Ok but for someone who says they don’t care or are suppose ally’s to women you get really upset at women/ terfs I’m saying this as a gay trans masc you need to chill bc this just gives them receipts that all trans women are men who are misgonistic and violent seriously stop replying to them if it really doesn’t bother you

Lord have mercy, I'm going to summon the patience to respond, and give you the response this deserves. I'm going to level with you

I have never clarified what my gender identity is beyond "they/them" because I didn't believe my identity mattered beyond, only the content of my words. But if this needs clarification I will provide it so no one misunderstands me. I am not a trans woman. I believe this discourse shouldn't have to be done by trans women exclusively. Why must someone who opposes bigots be marginalized? Why must the marginalized fight the bigotry in their own oppression? Why can't I, a gnc cis passing queer woman be absolutely appalled and moved with rage at how awful these cosplay conservatives tarnish the very lavel activism with their existence?

It's not fucking fair how little people get in the world to help, and they get even less the more layers of intersectionality we get. And the lower you get the less society cares about you. The only thing you can turn to is fucking activism when you get so oppressed everyone has a fucking reason to hate you. So you join feminist circles to gain community, and a twisted fucking surprise, even the people who claim to care about gender liberation "feminists" dont care.

I'm allowed to find the struggles of others maddening, in the same way I would hope good white allies to find racism maddening or men to find sexism infuriating. If you're a good ally you should be MAD that someone of your same intersectionality can't just fucking treat people right.

It shouldn't be on trans women to take the brunt of this, or insist everyone ignores them. They don't ignore trans women! They go to safe spaces for women and harasses them, disseminates their photos, their information, and relentlessly bully them! Respectfully, I do not see how I am guilty for the anger I feel for the complete blatant acts of human depravity it is to bully a group of women who have a scary high suicide rate. By not talking about it and just expecting people to fight this issue with silence, I believe that we don't provide adequate community.

It is not just enough to be not a transmisogynist, you have to be anti-transmisogynists. I should not have to put my life in danger by standing up for black people in a room of trump supporters. But a white person should use what privilege they have to stand up for what's right. If I expect allies to do that for me, I need to do that for groups I'm allied with.

Thank you for reaching out. And in situations like these please, think about what you say. I believe you intended good with this post, but I also believe you could reflect on your words. I don't believe it's fair to call a black women aggressive for anger.

No minority should be responsible for the whole group of people, it's not fair to make minorities play by their bigots rules to be respected. Basic human respect shouldn't be earned through respectability politics.

hi guys im having a normal one again (looking at the part of the 2015 transgender survey about trans sexual assault rates) shoutout to all my transmascs & nonbinary fuckers we are SOOO FUCKED

Wow... So they might actually outlaw self-medding for trans women here in Denmark and make estrogen and anti-androgens a controlled substance because of a bogus study that claims that self-medicating HRT *will* cause blood clots... All based on data from less than 50 trans women who've had blood clots early in life. All while literally not taking into account any of their other risk factors (substance abuse, V-Leiden, obesity, smoking, etc) and blaming it solely on their hormone treatment... Here we go backsliding on all the strides in regulation that we've made in the last decade wooooooooooo...

every time I want to kill myself I remember I can't because I don't want to give transphobes the pleasure of seeing that fucking number reach 50

TW: Suicide, misgendering & deadnaming

From January 14, 1860:

“An extraordinary case of a girl concealing her sex for many years, has been brought to light at Peitiers, France. Augustine, alias Augustus Baudouin, a young person of 17, was known in the town and neighborhood as an active lad, and had been in place in respectable houses as “odd boy.” This individual was lately tried for robbery, and while in prison, the authorities conceived some suspicion, and ascertained her to be female. On being asked what reason she had for wearing men's clothes, she said she had observed that men got their living easier than women; but she refused to give any information as to her birth and parentage. She was removed to the female wards, but her repugnance to appear in woman's attire among her fellow prisoners was so great, that she committed suicide by hanging herself on an iron bar with a pocket handkerchief.”

Augustus Baudouin gave the same excuse most other historical crossdressers AFAB did, that men had an easier time finding work or an easier life, which is why they crossdressed. I can think of only one man who, in the article about him, said that he had always wanted to be a boy. And it's clear why, because "I was so tired of my woman's place in society and needed food, so I simply had to dress as a man!" is a much better excuse than, potentially, "I feel like a man and I dress this way because I enjoy it." The former is much more likely to garner sympathy, while the latter exposes you as something unnatural.

But this one stood out to me, because Augustus committed suicide in prison after being forced to wear women's clothing and be called a woman's name. He refused to give the authorities any information on himself, and both that and his suicide imply that he was not a woman doing this for pure survival.

It also is impossible to hear about a trans man committing suicide after being outed and not draw connections to our modern life, where transmascs have some of the highest suicide attempt rates. This is not new- as long as there has been queerphobia there has been queer suicide, and it's an issue that has been addressed by queer activists since Magnus Hirschfeld and in Autobiography of an Androgyne.

I wish we could know more about Augustus outside of newspaper clippings written by cis people after his suicide, gawking over him as "an extraordinary case" after society directly led to his death. Like so many trans men&mascs, his story was told for him and his view on his own gender was erased. We don't know exactly how his assigned gender was "ascertained", or what he might have gone through in prison, or the circumstances that led him to living as he did before he was arrested. All we have left of him is the spectacle cis people made of him after his death.

Rest in peace, Augustus Baudouin. I'm sorry you were robbed of the life you deserve. Over a hundred years later, we remember you, and we remember every other transmasc who has been killed by transphobic society. Though you may have felt alone while you were living, now we know we aren't. We are organizing and fighting for a better world for all of us; I wish you could have seen it.

RORY MANCER from YIIK: A POSTMODERN RPG

JUSTIFICATION:

"SPOILERS FOR YIIK, TW SUICIDE

this is a hc i submit extremely cautiously. if you know even a little about yiik, you know that rory's sister carrie commits suicide. you probably also know that depending on alex's actions, rory can follow in his sister's footsteps. given a lot of stereotypes regarding trans suicide rates, you can see why i'm reluctant to submit this.

BUT!!!!!

i think rory paints an unfortunately realistic depiction of being a closeted transfem in the late 90s. she's an early adopter of scene cutlure (something very popular among trans and gnc folks alike). she's generally a lot more sensitive than all the other boys, yet she lashes out because she's holding so much hurt in. she thinks she's the worst thing to happen to everyone else in her life. the only positive relationship she has is to a woman she barely knows. she's just-

you see what i'm talking about right??????

honestly, if rory was able to self-actualize a little bit, she probably would've mellowed out a lot more. maybe with a little more self-respect, she might've even been able to see through alex's bullshit and realize that she's not responsible for everything. she might even be able to properly grieve carrie's loss.

p.s. that scene at the end where rory's ghost says "it's not your fault" is 1000000% bullshit. rory's suicide is very directly the result of actions taken in the game by alex. it's completely alex's fault." - Anonymous

Reminder: Submissions are always open! Submit here!

Hi there! Not sure if you did this before, but how about some really angst Nico fics?

You have come to right place.

Actually no I don't think so. I mean. Literally 90% of my blog is just angst. What type of angst are we talking about here bc I have many from all ratings and pairings you're not making this easy---

I guess I'd just put some general thing here...?

Spare the Rod by GwendolynStacy: Nico-centric, Demeter curses Nico, forcing him to obey whatever the others say and also rendering him helpless to ask for help. It's straight-up a bunch of angst. Gods Nico needs a hug. This hurts me physically. Oh boy.

and the fierce reluctance of disastrous stars by nottesilhouette: Nico encoutering Luke's ghost in Tartarus.

Healing the Dark series by anxiousastronaut18 (Solangelo, TW: Self-harm, Physical Assault, Suicidal thoughts... the whole bunch)

Not Yet Living, But Not Quite Dead by altar_boy (Jasico, trans ftm Nico, Unexpected Pregnancy): This focuses largely on Body Dysphoria and let me tell you this fic is heavy. Like. It took me a while to finish it bc the topic, the writing... it makes me have to put down my phone and breathe for a while bc otherwise I'd just keep crying. Nico goes through so much. It feels like a dead-end sometimes. Proceed with caution, but overall I'd say it's a good fic!

The first time, the last time by Joana789 (hints of Jasico): Nico dies.

Your Life in Reverse series by wewhofightmonsters (One-sided Percico, later reciprocated). My fav is actually Fire Bringer which takes Prometheus' POV telling Percico's story. I cried.

The Most Beautiful Sound I've Ever Heard by ewtp (Solangelo): A bunch of angst. Will's trying to help.

Dreams by Phelpsgirlxxx: Nico's in pain and Apollo wants to help.

Dream a Little Dream of Me by LacyFairgold: Again, angst. But at least they're trying.

playin' peek-a-boo with the devil these days by antlsepticeye: Nico finds out Jesus is really and that he was abandoned all this time. Catholic!Nico I think?

I'm so sorry if this feels like a jumble but srsly I have a lot bookmarked and it's hard to dig all up without a clear instruction on what to find. 😭😂😂 And I mean like the PJOverse itself is pretty much a Hurt/Comfort work for Nico anw, as if House of Hades isn't painful enough----

Nevertheless, hope you have a good time reading!!!

TW: child abuse, manipulation, brainwashing, misgendering, suicide mention, cult mentality, etc.

You can see how unhappy and forced their smile is. Their “mother” (i use that term loosely since a true mother wouldn’t do this to their kid) is stalking them and monitoring their every move.

I hope they manage to escape this. I remember how unhappy and suicidal I was when dealing with my internalized queerphobia.

This is why the trans suicide rate is so high. This is why we need more resources for trans youth. This is why we need to talk more about trans kids.

This kid is going to either grow up to escape the terfcult or is going to commit suicide. It’s a sad but true reality that needs to be talked about more.

About What Happened From Feb 7-9th

Hey everyone, I’m making another post and I promise it will be the last time I talk about this here, unless there’s a huge update. Since last time it was emotionally driven and I wasn’t in a good headspace I thought I would make another now that I’m in a better mental state and can think more clearly.  

For those who don’t want to read this insanely long post, here is a summarized version: February 7th Kevin uploads a sponsored video on Hogwarts Legacy. It brought a lot of transphobia into the community and it turned on each other. On February 9th Kevin wrote an apology on his subreddit and it has a mixed reception. 

With that out of the way I would encourage you to read the full post as I go into more detail, analyze Kevin’s post and also touch on the video itself since I did watch it when it was uploaded. 

Some trigger warnings will be needed for this. 

TW // transphobia and antisemitism mentions, topics on or related to suicide.

Should also mention that I am only trans, not Jewish, so I cannot speak on their behalf. But since HL has heavy antisemitic themes it would be unfair to leave them out of the conversation.

I am documenting this so it is not forgotten and we can learn from it. There may be things I missed and can add if I am informed. This is also all mostly from my perspective as a trans guy who was very active in all sides of the community during this, not just the subreddit or YouTube comments. 

A recap of the situation:

- February 7th at 12pm Pacific Standard Time, the video “Being a bad wizard in Hogwarts Legacy” by Call Me Kevin is uploaded. It is a sponsored video. 

- Within minutes of the video being posted, the comments become very toxic. People express their concern and/or disappointment that Kevin would promote that game to his audience. People in the replies tell them to off themselves or call them 41%ers, referring to the suicide rate of trans people.

- r/CallMeKevin discusses it in the comments of the bot post and the discussion is mostly respectful.

- The hate then spreads far into the community starting with the subreddit.

- A user wrote an open letter to Kevin about all of this and the comments were horribly transphobic with several upvotes and the thread gets locked. 

- People take to twitter to discuss it and fights break out there as well. The amount of tweets covering it makes the situation spread far outside of the community as outsiders also share their thoughts.

- Other subreddits, specifically trans ones, also cover what happened to what was once a safe space for trans people. 

- February 8th, 12 hours after the situation begins, Instagram account cmk_things, which is run by three trans admins, makes a statement. The comments on that post also become horribly transphobic, thus spurring on the hate to the CMK Instagram community. 

- Allegedly, Anna_Chess is also harassed about this. 

- February 9th at 5am PST Kevin makes the subreddit post titled “A letter to the CMK community”. It has a mixed reception with some forgiving him and others not. 

- A much smaller scale fight breaks out between the people most affected by this and people calling them soft for not wanting to immediately accept Kevin’s apology. 

- By the end of the day things begin to finally calm down. The worst of it has ended.

End of timeline, for now (but I hope it doesn’t continue unless it’s positive). 

Needless to say, this entire situation was horrible for everyone involved. I truly don’t want it to happen again and we can all learn something from this, which is why I have documented it. Next I wanted to analyze the post Kevin made to the subreddit.

Kevin’s Apology Post Link to the post if you haven’t seen it: https://www.reddit.com/r/CallMeKevin/comments/10xu9ot/a_letter_to_the_cmk_community/?utm_source=share&utm_medium=ios_app&utm_name=iossmf  In this section I wanted to touch upon this more since the wording of it confused me at first, but now that I am feeling better mentally I can properly comprehend it. This is all coming from the perspective of a trans man who’s been a very active community member for 3 years and an active viewer for 5 (and also was an A+ English student who did these a lot). I am not meaning to defend him or anything, rather just explaining it from how I see it. It starts off with him saying he is sorry and that he wanted to explain it from his side. In the next one he wrote “I'm not sure how this whole thing was covered in other countries but as someone who does not use social media this boycott was pretty much invisible.” I am from Canada and this pretty much wasn’t covered at all except online in places you’d only see it if you were from a minority the game impacts, so I will give him that. However, you’d think a gaming YouTuber would at least try to keep up with what’s going on in the gaming world. Kevin also wrote “I'm surprised that I've not heard any discussion within my recent streams or on my comment section given the scale of it.” There was discussion of it, though it was usually just one or two comments or were in places Kevin wouldn’t have seen it. During the stream on February 5th there was a conversation in the chat about it that did get missed where someone asked if he was going to play it and people started saying that they hope he doesn’t for obvious reasons. Though I understand why it was likely missed, Kevin wasn’t reading the chat much as he was playing with other people when it happened. In the next paragraph Kevin wrote “I had also heard of there being a boycott of some kind on the game but honestly assumed this was not a big thing, every other day I hear of someone/something being a problem and I just don't engage with that news.” So he admits to hearing about the boycott after saying it was invisible to him? Strange. Sometimes these things aren’t huge issues as the internet does like to blow things out of proportion (I mean, just look at this situation haha) but oftentimes it is serious and should be treated as such. I wouldn’t be surprised if he heard about it early on before the weeks leading up to the launch and made an assessment based off of that, but on the other hand, I still find it really strange how he didn’t know about how serious this was. Again, you’d think a gaming YouTuber would keep up with these things. Other ones I watch do, like RTGame and Kwite/Kwote. “When it comes to boycotts in a general sense I would disagree that buying something is endorsing the view of everyone involved.” Is the first line of the next section. To an extent he is right, not the devs’ fault that Rowling is a shitty person. Though giving your support to things like this gives the companies involved more incentive to continue, which is one of the reasons why the boycott happened. The problem also wasn’t entirely the fact he played it, rather it was the fact he was paid to promote it to his audience of viewers who were impacted by the game and how his community turned on itself. There is another line in this part that I pretty much have the same thing to say about so I won’t repeat myself, but it’s along the lines of “but JK Rowling wasn’t involved.” Kevin then addresses the comments. The first two statements have no issues, he is correct. Not everyone is as informed as others are. In the third one he explains that usually when his videos are promoted to an outside audience it does get more hate than usual. That is pretty standard for YouTube. He then explains that this time the hate was amplified by the situation and he disabled the comments on the video, which is good on him. Kevin ends this section essentially saying he doesn’t support people attacking others for who they are along with his community because “from my experience [the community] have been the most kind and supportive group of people.” I do a little gatekeeping here, I always have. I believe that genuine fans of CMK wouldn’t be transphobic or antisemitic. Though a lot of the bigotry came from inside the community with users who were either active subreddit users, had CMK related usernames and/or pfps or were usernames I recognized from previous kind comments I got on my artwork. I guess it was the 1% Kevin left out when he said 99%. Kevin then explains how he can see why someone would be on either side of this situation, which is probably not the best thing to put in an apology letter to your community after alienating them and, albeit unintentionally, enabling transphobia and antisemitism to go on. It’s not really a good idea to be neutral on things like this as one side will assume you’ve taken the other’s side and vice versa. It’s like he doesn’t want to make a definitive statement. I know he probably didn’t mean it like that but the way he worded it makes it sound like such. The final part is about how he doesn’t want to put out any more hate and apologizes about everything. When I first read it I actually started crying about the last line, probably because I was at my lowest during the situation and it was 5am. I didn’t sleep at all during those two days. The last line was “I'm sorry for any hurt I've caused you, I have felt terrible knowing I've hurt a group that have been nothing but nice to me.” I am glad he said something as I was very worried he was just going to remain silent or only apologize in a reply thread on Twitter where only a few would see it (like last time). Part of me wishes he did a bit more but I’m satisfied with this. I never once believed he would endorse this behaviour nor did I think he was transphobic. He made a huge mistake that has ruined his reputation and the trust his community had, he’s going to have to work hard to rebuild that. I’m a huge believer in that you can accept an apology but not forgive anyone for anything they may have done. I personally did accept the apology but haven’t forgiven him yet. He shouldn’t have done this in the first place and this situation could’ve been avoided. Though once more time passes and things calm down more I imagine I will. I am in a position to make that call, I am a transgender man who was targeted during this situation as I was very vocal about it. Though I’ll return to the community soon, I have projects that I started before the situation that I don’t want to scrap. I’m just glad that the worst of it is over, we can only improve from here. If Kevin is somehow reading this then I have this to say to you: I know I seem harsh but I don’t mean to be, though sometimes the truth hurts. I genuinely hope you learn from this and I know you never meant for this to happen in the first place. You’ve never come across as that type of person to me. For a while I’ve relied on your content and community as an escape from the real world that was nothing but harsh to me because I’m not the perfect cishet neurotypical catholic woman my family wanted. I would’ve hated for it to all end over something like this. Please, don’t let it happen again. I don’t want to see you become known as a YouTuber who prioritized money over real human lives instead of fictional. And also, skill issue tbh.

Not sure what else I expected from my favourite clueless cishet. It’s sad how he is the only YouTuber I watch who did apologize for this. All the others doubled down and I had to unsubscribe. Grateful Kevin didn’t go down that path.

My own apology: Now I want to take some time to apologize for the confusion that I have caused. I will admit I was not okay mentally when I wrote all those things and I said things I didn’t mean. I also understand that my words could’ve been easily misinterpreted, which did happen. I reek of undiagnosed bipolar disorder and I also have autism. I usually try to not let that fuel anything I talk about online but sometimes it gets the best of me. I’m not trying to use that as an excuse, rather it’s an explanation to why it happened. I will do my best to not let it happen again. I’m sorry. The video itself: I did actually watch the video. I wanted to so I could see if there was any mention of the controversy and so I wouldn’t make assumptions. I watched it while in a call on a Discord server I’m in. We all shouted “KEVIN NO” when we got the notification and continued to shout that once I said it was sponsored. The video itself doesn’t have many issues, aside from the obvious. It was an unbiased look at the game and didn’t feel any different from other CMK videos. If I am going to be honest, I would rather have Kevin do a video on it than someone who’s very clearly biased and the “I bought this game to own the libs” type. Though I still preferred there to be no video at all. He’s also not the only Irish Lad to do a video, Terroriser and Nogla also have and I’m not surprised. Its a video I won’t ever be watching again though. The first CMK video I actually hated watching. 

Addressing comments: During this I have gotten many comments and messages as I was very vocal during this and I’m also a fairly well known user. Even if you’ve never heard of me you’ve likely seen the things I’ve done. I wanted to publicly address them as it offers more insight to the situation. The most common one I’ve gotten were things along the lines of “You should’ve seen this coming” because he’s played the other Harry Potter games. Yes, I did see this coming. I knew he was going to play Hogwarts Legacy and I warned people that it would likely cause a divide. I never thought it would be this bad, I thought it would just be an argument on the subreddit again or something. If it was just a regular video that didn’t cause this mess I probably wouldn’t have cared as much. Another was “but Kevin played the other ones, does that mean those are bad too?” No, in fact I used to recommend Kevin’s videos to people who still wanted to consume Harry Potter content without supporting a TERF. I was never into HP growing up but I still loved his videos on it. Those games are old and you can’t buy them new anymore, so him buying them isn’t supporting J.K Rowling. It also wasn’t entirely about the fact he played the game, it’s the fact he was paid to promote it to a community that is harmed by Rowling’s actions and it turned his once kind community horribly transphobic and antisemitic. That was the issue. “But don’t you have more important issues to focus on?” I see where you’re coming from with this but do you think we have that kind of power? Also, what group of people are making these anti-trans laws? Definitely not trans people. We are doing what we can to tackle those issues too, trust me. There’s only so much we can do. I guess it only becomes an issue when it slightly inconveniences you. “Why are you so soft?” “You can’t hold onto this forever.” “He apologized so get over it.” If you’re not trans and/or Jewish you don’t get to make those calls. When I say “trans” I am using it as an umbrella term, it affected every non-cis person in the cult too. What happened was absolutely fucking horrible and it’s understandable to why we aren’t quick to forgive Kevin and the community. We had our trust completely broken and it takes a while to heal from that. You wouldn’t be quick to forgive someone either if this happened to you. What someone does is not up to you to decide, if some choose to never forgive him then that’s their choice and we have to respect it. “I wish he would take down the video though.” I do too, but since it’s a sponsored video he likely can’t as he’s bound by a contract. If he breaches the contract he can be sued and he’s not winning that lawsuit from Warner Brothers. A situation like this has happened before where he took a sponsor from Activision/Blizzard while they were being sued for allowing sexual harassment to go on, so I hope this doesn’t become a continuous pattern. Hopefully he learns his lesson this time.  “But people were harassing him!” Where? Fucking where? I mean sure there may have been a few extreme people but all I saw were people expressing their disappointment and getting called slurs for it. The only people being harassed in this were the people who spoke out. I’ve been sent death threats, told to “join the 41%” and purposely misgendered because people thought I was attacking Kevin. Trans rights, until it means your favourite YouTuber gets criticized for enabling transphobia. “It’s not that big of a deal.” How fucking privileged and/or oblivious are you to see all this happen and go “eh, not a big deal”. As ridiculous as this all was, it was a huge deal. Huge enough to damage Kevin’s reputation online and, well, you know the rest.  And these comments weren’t addressed to me but I thought they were funny. Basically people congratulating Kevin for “not going woke”. Like, the existence of his sims and GTA RP series invalidates your entire sentence. You gotta be new to the channel or something or you think Grognak the Destroyer is cis or Jim Pickens is cishet. I also just hate that phrase, woke. 

As we reach the end of this really long thing I originally typed up at 8pm on a Friday night on a Google doc, I wanted to take a moment to thank a few people. It was a horrible situation for everyone and it reminded me that the genuine fans were still out there. Thank you to my friends and partners who supported me and came to fight for me. Thank you to everyone who sent me kind messages and/or left nice comments on my posts and art. It gave me the hope I needed. I hope someday we can restore the cult to what it once was, but it won’t be an overnight process nor will it be the same again. Despite everything, I stayed behind and watched everything happen so I could document it. If the cult was coming to an end I wanted to be there for it. I’m glad it didn’t. If you don’t want to come back then that’s completely understandable. I think we need to follow Jim’s rules more with the first one being “Be kind to everyone.” The cult was the only safe space I had for the longest time as I grew up in an extremely conservative area with an unaccepting family. I also sorta grew up watching CMK as well, I discovered him when I was 14 and I turn 20 later this year. His sims series was my first exposure to queer content and it made me feel so validated because I thought I was the only one who thought it was weird that guys can only like girls and vice versa. I would roleplay as Jim once with other members of the community and realize that being referred to as a man felt right. The community would pay to draw the characters in maid outfits and fund part of my legal transition. They would always come to defend me whenever bullshit happened because a few users got offended by a pride flag or a fursuit. CMK is a pretty big part of my life and I was very heartbroken when all this happened. Still am. I cried so hard I pulled a muscle somehow, that was neat. It’s poetic in a way that I made the last post on the subreddit before this shitshow happened. What happens before a storm? A warning, usually. I was the warning for the upcoming storm. My arrival in the cult was a prophecy. That or it was just a massive coincidence, that is more likely.  - SnowfallWarning/Big Jimbo Pickens

Transgender Day of Remembrance

Trans rights are human rights!

Let's take a moment to reflect on the lives of trans/gender diverse people that have been lost due to violence, and increasingly due to suicide. 😔🕯️🏳️‍⚧️

This is hitting me especially hard this year, as I think of all the beautiful people we have lost and continue to lose.

My challenge to everyone this year is to think about the ways we can improve the lives of trans/gender diverse people, and put that into practice today and every day. Some suggestions to follow below.

[ CW/TW - transphobia, murder, suicide, violence and hate discussed but not described ]

In their annual update, Transrespect versus Transphobia Worldwide stated there were 327 reported murders of transgender and gender-diverse people between 1 October 2021 and 30 September 2022.

Worse, we know the numbers are likely vastly higher because they are based on media reports. At Least 3 in 4 of the known trans/gender diverse victims of fatal violence will be misgendered in police or media reports surrounding their deaths, and most trans/gender diverse people don't have ID that matches their name and pronouns*.

*68% of trans/gender diverse people in the US don't have accurate ID - the global number is likely much higher

Some heartbreaking facts:

People of color in the trans/gender diverse community are at a much higher risk of being murdered.

Transgender people experience non-fatal violence more than four times more frequently than cisgender people.

Transgender women and men experience much higher rates of violent victimization (86.1 and 107.5 per 1,000 people, respectively) than cisgender women and men (23.7 and 19.8 per 1,000 people, respectively).

More than half of trans/gender diverse people have experienced sexual assault and/or intimate partner violence.

82% of transgender people have considered suicide, and 40% have attempted suicide.

Trans/gender diverse adults are 8 times more likely to be suffering serious psychological distress than the cisgender population.

61% of trans/gender diverse youth are battling symptoms of depression, compared to 29% of non-LGBTQ+ youth.

A recent study on suicide rates among adolescents gives us a glimpse into how serious the issue is for trans/gender diverse youth. The study looked at 11-19 year old adolescents over a 36 month period. 14% had reported attempting suicide. An examination of the percentage of kids attempting suicide from each gender identity group is shocking and heartbreaking.

50.8% Female-to-male transgender

41.8% Non-binary

29.9% Male-to-female transgender

27.9% Questioning

17.6% Cisgender female

9.8% Cisgender male

What can I do?

I know sometimes stats like this can come across as gratuitous, but I think it's important for all of us to understand the severity of the suffering transgender people experience. Only then can we fully grasp how much they need our support.

The number one thing we can all do to improve the lives of transgender people is to respect their gender identities as valid and real, and affirm those identities in our daily lives by using the correct name and pronouns (never assume, and never ask a trans person what their original name or pronouns were).

If you don't understand or believe trans identities are real, educate yourself. This is the internet. There are resources everywhere.

Do not assume someone's gender, or require someone to be of a particular gender in order for their perspective, interests, appearance or behavior to be considered acceptable or valid by you. Do not require people to 'out' themselves in order to earn your respect or have their voice be considered valid.

TALK to trans/gender diverse people! If you don't know any, befriend some, or reach out to the many trans people who are out and proud. Ask questions. Let them know you want to be an ally and to support them.

Respect common-sense boundaries. Don't ask about personal things like genitals, sexual activity, surgery or hormones.

Avoid backhanded compliments like, "I'd never guess you're transgender!" or "You look so real!"

Don't be a bystander. When we witness someone being discriminated against, mocked or misgendered - when we see transphobic attacks, jokes or slurs being made - STEP UP in their defense if it is physically safe to do so. Even when no trans person is present, speaking up against hate speech, mockery and misgendering wherever and whenever it occurs should be an automatic reaction in our lives. It should never be socially acceptable to harm others (and this behavior does harm).

Similarly, do not be a bystander when you see someone who is in distress. Reach out and offer your support, or else ensure that support reaches them in some way. You might save a life.

Stand up for the human rights of transgender and gender diverse people. Put your money where your mouth is. Vote for candidates who make trans rights a priority, and find ways to support trans people in your community and around the world.

Support queer refugee and asylum organizations around the world that are working hard to help queer people escape state violence and oppression.

Donate to causes that are doing this work. Particularly organizations led by trans/gender diverse people.

Seek out, elevate and amplify the voices of trans and gender diverse people at every opportunity. Work to help eliminate the marginalization and silencing of trans voices.

Stand up and work hard against racism, poverty, social injustice, sex work stigma and other major factors that contribute to the suffering of transgender people.

Trans women are women. Trans men are men. People's identities are real and complete based on how they self-identify. Resist the urge to 'qualify' them or set them apart from cisgender women and men in your mind or behavior.

Affirm and support all trans/gender diverse identities, regardless of that person's gender presentation. Not all transgender people decide to or are able to undergo medical transition. A transgender woman who looks and sounds masculine to you is still a woman.

This is by no means a comprehensive list. There are probably thousands of other ways we can help and support trans/gender diverse people in our lives. This is something we should actively explore and prioritize. It's unconscionable to stand by and watch others suffer, yet make no move toward change.

BE KIND TO OTHERS.

We never know what someone is going through, what their private hell is like. We should never underestimate our power to help someone survive just by being loving and kind, giving a smile, affirming someone's existence and value.

Lives have been saved by a smile or simple kind word at the right time. This happens much more frequently than we know.

Sources:

HRC -Dismantling a Culture of Violence

TMM TDOR 2022 Report

Transgender Adolescent Suicide Behavior

Suicidality Among Transgender Youth: Elucidating the Role of Interpersonal Risk Factors

‼️‼️TRANS STUDENTS IN THE UK‼️‼️

please share this as it is uncertain but likely and puts MANY students at risk

(this is likely to apply primarily to secondary school students but again we really dont know)

additionally just adding a preface i do not know all the information and have not fully read the paper however i do believe that these are firmly risks that people need to at least be aware of

tw: mention of detransition, suicide and endangering children

Following a centre-right paper about the threats of transgender students, sunak has announced there will be changes in advice/safeguarding laws concerning gender/transgenderism in schools.

this is the paper but i warn you it is incredibly disrespectful and dehumanising and hinestly terrifying so please have cautikn

https://policyexchange.org.uk/publication/asleep-at-the-wheel/

although we do not know what the update will be these are the suggestions from the paper which are likely to be highly consideredconsidering previous anti-trans sentiments:

1. any student questioning their gender to a teacher will be outed to their parents as a "safeguarding" measure

(this will remove safe spaces for students who cannot risk their family knowing thus increasing the suicide rates. they want us dead)

2. schools cannot let students socially transition in any way (name, pronouns, sports teams etc)

(again this removes safe spaces and any form of gender affirmation from those they meet the most, again suicide rates. this will likely also result in forcibly detransitioning many students such as myself)

3. schools must show all pshe/sex ed material to parents to ensure their approval

(likely forcing schools to remove lgbtq+ topics including risks such as AIDS or the mere existence of queerness)

4. schools must change their approach to stop encouraging "gender distressed" children

(they want to bury our existence even if it hurts people)

5. bathrooms, changing rooms and competitive sports must be single sex

(removing gender neutral facilities and also for some reason mixed gender teams pushing ideas of boys and girls needing to be separated)

6. LGBTQ topics are safeguarding issues (legally considered as hurting people)

(demonises queerness and removes awareness)

7. schools must be punished for not informing parents that a student has questioned their gender in any way

(means schools are forced to out students regardless of whether it actually benefitd them)

8. schools cannot mention gender critical beliefs or ideas of sex being different to gender

(trying to hide our existence to snuff us out despite going against science and medicine)

overall? THE GOVERNMENT WANT US GONE.

weve seen whats happening in america and as with many things its been likely to happen here for a while now. until the start of the summer term were waiting for the other shoe to drop as to how bad this may be but it doesnt look good.

This will endanger many students either due to the outing or not being able to voice trans issues/ be accepted by those who previously would have- i myself am preparing for a long and diffcult conversation with various teachers that have constantly supported me

Also be aware that whatever happens may set a precedent for the future. even if youre not trans if youre in any way queer this might effect you from holding back education on queer relationships to potentially finding a similar rule set for sexuality.

if you can talk to teachers NOW about your name/pronouns before the official changes are made and they can claim having never known. play it safe. do not put yourself at risk

additionally, you are valid no matter how you are percieved, how you present or how you must act to ensure your safety.

love you all <3

poem #8

(this one is a long one and comes with a list of TWs, so the actual poem is below the cut. this one is also a lot more prose-poetry/slam poetry-esque than my other stuff :thumbsup:)

TW for school shootings, trans genocide/transphobia, abortion (mentioned), police brutality (mentioned), suicide (mentioned).

the thing about TikTok written 4 april 2023

y’know, i only opened this app because i saw a clip somewhere of one of my favourite bands. the singer made a joke in Scotland last night, and surely someone had to have posted a better-quality video on TikTok.

it was the first thing i saw when the app loaded, because they just know me so well. i watched it and saved it so that i can watch it again as a distraction or something later. but then i made the mistake of scrolling.

the next thing i saw was a 5-minute video about how people my age and younger were screaming for their lives just across the pond outside of government buildings. they are desperate not to be killed in their classrooms, desperate to live through this semester, desperate to be heard, but the suit-wearing rulers shuffled through their 1000-person sea, one foot at a time like it was dark and they couldn’t see the people my age and younger lining the walls, holding their signs, screaming for change. i watch it, and i have to keep scrolling.

some video about all the shit you can buy for just 8 USD from a gas station in Japan. i don’t watch the whole thing; i keep scrolling.

someone with a cool haircut is sitting on the floor of their bedroom, crying. the sound playing is saying something from a show i haven’t watched about a storybook fox who is sick and tired of living in a hole. they are crying, the tags say that they are trans, and they are crying. their bio says they are just 14, that’s three whole years younger than i am and something in me surges because that is my sibling whose name i don’t know and that i may never get to because the threat of genocide has them, 14, crying on their bedroom floor. not tonight, i think in silence. i do not want to cry tonight. and so i keep scrolling.

and the next video is an indie artist who didn’t exist a year and a half ago, but even so, their new single that when viral drops in a few nights so i follow their page and i hold my breath: should i scroll again? i do, i don’t learn.

and there’s a joke i don’t get with the loudest fucking noise i’ve ever heard. it makes no sense, i scroll again.

oh look, a 9-year-old girl who got shot when she went back to pull the fire alarm so her classmates would know to run. run. run. her face is the centrepiece, her smile from an earlier date something i need to learn to shake off by tonight. i can’t even imagine what being her might have been like. i scroll again.

a cover of a song, sung atop guitar chords; another joke that the comments don’t explain to me either; another reminder of the imposing genocide; abortion bans are being enforced; they’re using force against unarmed protesters again; a poem spoken to me by a person named Lee; more tour clips to distract me; some statistics about teen suicide rates rising in the States; and one of those checkpoints that tells you that it’s time for a break. stand up, stretch, get some water. the song playing low in the background is one i’ve heard maybe a hundred times by now, but i do as i’m instructed, and i take a deep breath.

my curtains are open and i can see through my window. i remember the song i started writing the other day about how people like me seldom live long enough to see their hair turn grey. i remember how i couldn’t finish it off because something salty and wet rubbed the ink off my page and i closed my book and i pretended that i wasn’t upset, like how, in an hour from now, when dinner is served hot in front of me and they ask me “how has your day been?” i will pretend my phone is not heavy in my pocket and that the kids' shouting isn’t plaguing me and that trans people aren’t losing their right to exist and be free and that a girl half my age wasn’t shot because she got unlucky one day.

and i regret opening TikTok every time that i do because i always fail to miss all those kids i heard dance on here. instead, i get singers on stages and artists who speak and kids who know how to barricade doors with desks and bookshelves and how to defend themselves with their trendy metal water bottles, and news about the latest legislation passed that ensures that more kids will be forcefully born into a cyclical mess where they don’t get to grow up without routine checks as to whether they can tell apart a juice box pop and a gunshot.

and there are not enough words to tell you all the things i have heard scrolling through TikTok, where the mothers are gentle with their children until they go to sleep, because then they take off their soft tones and don their broken voices, screaming out in hopes that their kids won’t have to.

it has to be a phenomenon: the ability you need to grow by my age if you want to use an app as unsuspecting as the sound of a clock, TikTok. if you cannot master empathy and apathy and the way in which you must be able to switch between one and the other at the littlest flick of your wrist because what’s funny one minute must always precede the latest tragedy, death giving way to a joke and a smirk from a pretty girl in a skirt whose page a month ago was all about ways you can help in Ukraine, but clearly, she has become a master of this miracle.

and at the end of it all, when it has been hours of hearing about Neo-nazis and the generalised patriarchy and the right or wrong ways to raise bread yeast, i think three things:

one: a simmering roll of “wow”. both my empathy and apathy have been expended, and now, i have nothing left to give.

two: i am never coming back here again, like a hotel where they promise a rest, a break, a chance to get away from your day-to-day stress. one star.

three: oh look, my band said something funny again, and god, i could use a distraction.

Tw: Discussions of Trans Suicide and Mental health issues

Being Non-Binary (or in any other situation where you can't exactly pass as cis) sucks because just blend isn't really an option in our society so I essentially have two options

(A) Be out, correct people that don't recognise your gender CONSTANTLY. Deal with all the backlash that comes with that, (the ignorance, the weird stares and invasive questions ect.) and also accept that some people are so stuck in there norms they just won't learn and will continue to class you how THEY see fit.

(B) Don't disclose anything, endure being constantly being misgendered and let your mental health corrode slowly until you have a breakdown, rinse and repeat. All just to maintain safety and not be stigmatised.

-

And people wonder WHY the mental health amd suicide rate amongst trans youth is so high, when your constantly shoved between a rock and a hard place because your fellow humans beings won't treat you with the most basic sense of fucking dignity.

Don't even get me started on the harassment, seeing news articles advocating for genocide the lack of safety in the medical field, and fuck me all the "research" in trying to get us to not exist

I'm so fucking tired

Disclaimer: this is just how I perceive things as a trans queer person. Not everything I have to say is 100% factually proven.

TWs for suicide mentions and homophobia/transphobia

the urge to write a fully cited, grammatically profound article of why the lgbt community is still threatened for those with the mindset that "they have pride parades so obviously they're not oppressed".

Honey.

Clearly you're rotting your three braincells browsing the Twitter of bigots like Rowling and Musk and acting like you're so fucking smart.

Look at the fucking news.

82% of trans people have considered killing themselves (circa April 2020). Around 40% have attempted.

The worst part? This rate is highest among children. Fucking children are killing themselves because of this.

Bullying isn't helping shit, transphobia in general isn't helping shit, and these new laws certainly aren't helping shit.

In at least 66 countries, even being suspected of being gay is punishable by law. And you call us "pampered"? Not everyone has the money to emigrate to a safe country. Not everyone is safe.

So let me ask you this.

Do you know anyone who has been disowned for being straight? Who has been arrested for being cis? Do you and your black and white pebble for a brain know of any anti-hetero laws being put into action recently? Ever?

That's what I fucking thought.

We wave our flags and hold parades to show how far we've come and how much further we'll go, not to flaunt or say we're better. There's so much left to do and accomplish, just so we have the same rights as cishets. Calling us "pampered" or "snowflakes" is exactly what we're trying to fight against, and the fact you're spreading that misinformation will only encourage us to hold more parades.

Because clearly, there's more work to do.

Sources:

https://pubmed.ncbi.nlm.nih.gov/32345113/

https://www.humandignitytrust.org/lgbt-the-law/map-of-criminalisation/

Tw talking about suicide and abuse

Yeah like. What about if a person's mental health problems and life struggles are almost entirely the fault of their bigoted or abusive parents. And then they kill themself. Are we to say said parents are not at fault?? Like sure they didn't specifically murder them. But in every way except literally...they kinda Did.

Yes exactly!!!! & this specifically applies so much to the deaths of transmascs. Trans men have been shown again and again to have some of (if not most) highest rates of suicide. Undoubtedly much of that is related to transphobia. But even beyond that there are so many situations where someone's cruel treatment of another person leads to their death.

& I'm not saying the solution here is that everyone who does that is Evil and needs to be sent away but I feel like we SHOULD expect accountability. What justice is there if you can directly cause someone's death but because it was somehow indirect enough that you don't have any responsibility to acknowledge that and change or do something for their loved ones??

Don't You (Forget About Me)

by ThxxKitKat

TW - suicide attempt, depression

"The rain continued, monotonous and grounding. Only the rain. Never ending, churning, pattering, falling.

What if… What if it were to stop?

Fat, freezing droplets rolled down Peter’s face, clinging to his eyelashes and dripping from his nose. The teenager’s shoulders shook lightly and unevenly, wet hiccups silenced by the incessant roar of the rain. Peter didn’t so much flinch as his body swayed precariously on the edge. He blinked blankly, breath tumbling steadily from his mouth. What was living anyway?

He took the step."

Post NWH Peter is lost and alone. He has nobody. He's fed up. Upon attempting to end the pain and suffering, however, Peter finds himself dropped right back into the past. What will he do with the painful memories of his now-future. Reuniting with friends and family, Peter slowly heals and learns what it is to be a teenager again but what will he do as history starts to change before his eyes?

WIP (I'm writing this as I go and there is a possibility this won't ever get finished, just FYI)

Words: 2394, Chapters: 1/?, Language: English

Fandoms: Marvel Cinematic Universe

Rating: Teen And Up Audiences

Warnings: Graphic Depictions Of Violence

Categories: F/F, Gen, M/M

Characters: Peter Parker, Harley Keener, A cat, Tony Stark, James "Bucky" Barnes, Loki (Marvel), Stephen Strange, Happy Hogan, Shuri (Marvel), Michelle Jones, Ned Leeds, Natasha Romanov (Marvel), Pepper Potts, James "Rhodey" Rhodes, Sam Wilson (Marvel), Avengers Team, Bruce Banner

Relationships: Peter Parker & Tony Stark, Peter Parker & his cat, Ned Leeds & Peter Parker, Peter Parker & Pepper Potts, James "Bucky" Barnes & Peter Parker, Peter Parker & Natasha Romanov, Happy Hogan & Peter Parker, Michelle Jones & Ned Leeds & Peter Parker, Loki & Peter Parker, Peter Parker & Stephen Strange, Peter Parker & Shuri, Peter Parker & James "Rhodey" Rhodes, Peter Parker & Sam Wilson, Avengers Team & Peter Parker, Harley Keener/Peter Parker, Michelle Jones/Shuri, Tony Stark/Stephen Strange (implied), Pepper Potts/Tony Stark (past), Michelle Jones/Peter Parker (past), Bruce Banner & Peter Parker

Additional Tags: Irondad, spiderson, Trans Peter Parker, Tony Stark Acting as Peter Parker's Parental Figure, Hurt Peter Parker, Peter Parker Needs a Hug, Angst, (there is so much angst i'm sorry), Peter Parker's Field Trip to Stark Industries, Peter meets Harley for the first time, Post-Spider-Man: No Way Home (Movie), Time Travel Fix-It, Pre-Movie: Avengers: Infinity War (2018), Peter Parker is a Mess, Peter is very smart, Suicide Attempt

source https://archiveofourown.org/works/46725910