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#social commentary
triaelf9 · 5 months
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I'm sure some people online could spend their time better
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aptericia · 3 months
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Not proud to be here.
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Ok, here goes draft like 5 of this fucking post. I spent 4 hours tossing and turning in bed last night thinking about this, and then this morning I found a tumblr post that really helped me understand what I was trying to say.
The post talks about how aromantic "advocates" claim that "aros don't take up resources, so there's no reason not to include them!" And if that's actually what people believe, I think I can finally articulate why it is that I feel so alienated in queer spaces.
It's because aspecs in general aren't "welcomed" by much of the queer community. We're tolerated. We perhaps get the luxury of not being contradicted on our own identities, or not being specifically kicked out of LGBTQ-only spaces, but that's the whole point: what we get out of the queer "community" is people NOT doing things, not actually doing things FOR us. And that, frankly, is not enough. We deserve conversations about us. We deserve to have others consider our feelings, even when making lighthearted jokes. We deserve varied, respectful representation in media. We deserve the active deconstruction of amatonormativity in society. We deserve to have space made for us, rather than at most being told we should "go take up more space!" ourselves.
Of course, the reality is that my being aspec is a personal matter that does not inherently affect anyone else. But the same can be said for literally any queer identity. Your being gay doesn't say anything about me, so of course I shouldn't hurt you for it, but why should I help you either? Because your happiness and comfort are important. The same goes for aspecs.
And most of the time, I don't even need anyone to make space for or expend resources on me; I can live fine in everyday, non-queer-specific places without mentioning my identity at all. But it's the queer community that claims it will make that space for me, doesn't, and then acts defensive and morally pure if I call out the hypocrisy because "we're queer too, you can't erase our identities to advocate for yours!!!!"
Again, this post isn't about specifics. I have queer friends who are incredibly thoughtful and supportive about my identity, just as I have non-queer friends who are. I find more solidarity in aspec-only communities, as well as trans/genderqueer ones, although there are still many exceptions. This post is also not about amatonormative ideology, which is extremely common from queer and non-queer people alike. This post is about the reason I've felt so betrayed by the queer community.
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On a personal note, I remember being so excited when I started identifying as aromantic (and later asexual). Fitting myself into labels has been a lifelong struggle for me; to this day I still can't confidently say if I'm White or PoC, neurotypical or neurodivergent, abled or disabled, cisgender or not cisgender. I continue to struggle making friends because I don't fall into social cliques. To discover that I officially, certainly, was LGBTQ+ lifted a huge weight off my shoulders. And now I'm just so sad to find that despite that, I'm still stuck in the middle. I didn't get rewarded with a community. I still feel alienated from both queer and non-queer people. I know it was silly to get my hopes up when there's such vast diversity in both groups, but it really was a disappointment. Going to my first Pride parade last year was really the moment where I realized this.
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fancywordology · 7 months
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It's also not about making the movements anti-man, anti-white, anti-straight. Very important to remember.
And it's NOT ABOUT YOU AS AN INDIVIDUAL either if you're a part of these groups. It's about the GROUPS.
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queerism1969 · 1 year
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sunbeamedskies · 23 days
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Hating nazis does not mean you’re not prejudiced against Jews. Posting about how you’d love to punch a nazi is not your get-out-of-accusations-of-antisemitism free card
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catgirl-kaiju · 5 months
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it's so funny to think abt how the dystopian levels of surveillance and data collection we are subjected to every day without consent, and sometimes without awareness being done primarily for the purpose of advertising goods and services to people. targeted ads that so often get blocked and ignored because everyone hates ads.
just... the hilarity of a vast network of machines dedicated to spying on everyone in the world, straight out of the mind of a deranged conspiracy theorist, which exists to let you know that shoes are 10% off at wal-mart, and which doesn't actually make you want to shop at wal-mart
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silvermoon424 · 7 months
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I hate how much of the obesity "debate" basically boils down to "fat people don't have any self-control and just need to put the fork down to get me to respect them. Because then they'll be thin."
Hardly anyone actually wants to confront the systematic causes of obesity; it's always about "personal responsibility." And like yeah, I don't deny that that plays a part, but God forbid you ever suggest there are factors outside of people's control too, then you're "glorifying obesity."
I've legit heard some fatphobic people say that Japan has such low rates of obesity because of their national attitude of shame towards fat people, ergo we need to start viciously shaming fat people worldwide. They never seem to mention that Japan has an abundance of fresh, healthy, easily available, and cheap food; you can literally walk into a corner 7-11 and buy a fresh and nutritious meal for a few bucks. There's just nothing like that in the US. Many parts of Japan are also very walkable, encouraging people to ride bikes, walk, etc instead of driving everywhere.
Idk, it just really bothers me how so many people act like fat people are solely responsible for their weight when entire policies are the result of food companies lobbying the government to influence the way food is made and distributed. Very often not for the better. Not to mention how these decisions and obesity in general disproportionately impacts the poor and BIPOC.
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decolonize-the-left · 9 months
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.....does anyone else get the vibe that the limitless expanse of the internet, media, and consequent ability to interact politically, spiritually, and apathetically with people locally and globally maybe had an influence not only on the individual's relation to the collective but also their ability to participate in it and see their significance to it?
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Can we talk about it?
Like I feel like as some who was a frontline activist and now is a disabled social activist who dabbles in radicalizing liberals... The wall I and my peers continuously keep running into is the collective feeling that someone else will do it.
"it" being whatever action.
For me it's signing a petition, protesting, donating, community organizing (both online and offline).
We get tons of interest on stuff. Interest which very rarely translates to doing more than showing a poster to the friend theyre with before trashing it, reblogging a post, or hitting "interested" or like when we post local events.
And on All these platforms posts gets to a point of "enough" responses where ppl just stop responding and sharing, too.
On Tumblr you see this a lot with donation posts and people constantly having to make new ones. Cuz they're getting notes, but not tangible assistance that will help them. And the reblogs stop because there are so many notes that ppl start assuming that the goal was met or will be met soon.
But that isn't what's happening. And like I said this isn't just with donation posts or money so the answer isn't "well ppl are broke" which would be an easy and sensible answer.
Honestly, I've been thinking that with so Many people easily accessible online with so many opinions and varying levels of popularity and followers that it's easy to lose yourself in them. Especially now when so much of life takes place online.
It's so easy to think you're just one of those many people. ....So surely nobody would notice if you were being a little facetious, right?
Gonna be real, it seems a lot to me like a lot of people are trying to hide their lack of integrity through the anonymity offered online.
And like sure maybe nobody would notice if it was just a few people being facetious about supporting something but it's SO MANY (in my experience? Upwards of a thousand once) and Everywhere. Online, offline, and apps.
And the thing that makes it weird is that every one is assuming that people are being more helpful than they are. That more people are showing up.... Even though they themselves are not showing up either. Like I said reblogs for donations stop, shares stop, and only a handful of ppl show up to events irl. You can literally compare reblogs to the signatures when a petition is being shared.
Wanting to show up isn't the same as showing up.
"People" are not coming to change or show up to the revolution. It's you. You are the people. You are the people that need to show up. Not just as a notification on my screen but actually, because you think someone else will have enough integrity to show up for you but they don't.
Your integrity matters.
You matter so much. I don't know what it is behind this mass behavior that has y'all acting otherwise but I'm telling y'all right now that YOU and the choices that YOU make matter. The events that you choose to spend your time at and how you spend your energy and protecting your rights matters!
That isn't some "im just another drop fighting an endless battle in the ocean" kind of deal.
I'm telling you from experience: there is no ocean! We are in a fucking drought and every drop matters.
Show up. Nobody else is doing it on your behalf.
.......or is it just me? Has anyone else noticed this
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animentality · 5 months
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intersectionalpraxis · 2 months
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averageperson888 · 4 months
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caitlinjohns77 · 1 month
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queerism1969 · 10 months
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juniperandjustice · 5 months
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catgirl-kaiju · 2 months
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"afab trans women/transfems" are terf shit btw. the intent is to make afab detrans folks work against their own interests by attacking trans women who try to point out that that's not the way those words work. trans and detrans folks have a lot of the same needs, don't let bigots drive a wedge between us.
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silvermoon424 · 1 year
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Literally one of the most important lessons I've ever internalized is "you don't NEED to fully understand something to support someone's rights."
This has been especially relevant for me with issues of gender and trans rights. I'm a cis woman who's very comfortable being a woman. If I'm being honest, while I understand a lot of the basics of gender discourse and topics, I don't think I'll ever be able to personally relate to it or understand it on a deeper level. I'm just happily cis. I don't get gender.
But I think a lot of cis people- and this used to be me- get super caught up in trying to fully understand trans issues. And don't get me wrong, that's important, but you don't NEED to know the intricacies of being bigender or whatever in order to support that person's rights. A trans man/woman or nonbinary person is just that, a person. They deserve to be happy like the rest of us.
The same applies to race, other aspects of gender, etc- like, a white person doesn't need to understand what it's like to personally be black and subjected to systematic racism to be an ally, nor does a man need to fully grasp what it's like to be a woman and subjected to systemic misogyny. Is it important to try? Of course!! It's always extremely important to be empathetic and willing to listen and learn.
But so many people get caught up in "well, I don't GET this so it must not be real." They don't understand that it's okay to not "get" something. Someone else's rights and happiness are not dependent on your personal progress learning about what life is like for them. God I wish I could rubber-stamp this into every single homo sapiens' brain.
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