#one with beans that i can stick in the microwave and warm up | Explore Tumblr Posts and Blogs

geraltofriviasleftbuttcheek · 3 years

Text

"C'mon, princess," Geralt coaxes gently, holding the piece of zucchini up to Ciri's mouth, "you've gotta eat it. I promise it's not that bad."

Ciri turns her chin away, face pinched in displeasure. She makes a soft "na" sound, her little fist reaching out and making a grabbing gesture at the plate of banana mush he put on her high chair tray. It's their compromise: baby food she's used to after she eats the solid food they introduce.

He shakes his head with a smile. "You can have the bananas after you eat the zucchini," he tells her. He makes a gesture at his own plate where the omelette he'd made for himself is cooling. "Look, it's in my own breakfast. It's good, I promise."

She kicks her feet, brow furrowed. Her face is still pinched and she keeps turning it away from him every time he brings the vegetable to her mouth. He laughs at how cute she is making that grumpy face at him. She's definitely his daughter.

"It's not any worse than the bananas," he says, faking his exasperation. He picks up the spoon from the plate, bringing it to his own mouth to make his point. His own face scrunches up, nose wrinkling at the taste. Eugh. The zucchini is better, why in the world do babies prefer this?

"Is Daddy trying to feed you the icky zucchini?" Jaskier's voice says, and then he's swooping in to shower kisses over her cheeks, and Geralt feels warmth spread in his chest as she giggles under the attention.

He sits up, pretending to huff. "Daddy's trying to work out a compromise, and you're spoiling it," he says pointedly as Jaskier takes the spoon from him and feeds her the bananas like she'd wanted. "She's supposed to be eating solids too now."

"And she will," Jaskier agrees, feeding her another bite of banana mush. She's settled into her chair more happily now. "But maybe don't start with the zucchini?"

Geralt rolls his eyes but turns to his own breakfast, which is almost un-appetizingly cold now. "I had some left over. Figured I'd give it a shot. We can try green beans for lunch or dinner, I guess."

"Sounds a lot better than zucchini, doesn't it, sweet girl?" Jaskier asks her, then kisses her head, murmuring other nonsense to her as he continues to feed her.

It makes Geralt's stomach flutter to see how soft and gentle his best friend is with his daughter, and once again he pushes the feeling away. It's not like that between them, and probably won't ever be, and he needs to get over this silly crush that just keeps lingering for some reason.

It doesn't matter that he wants to kiss Jaskier stupid sometimes because he's so overwhelmed with feelings, or hold his hand when they go grocery shopping, or curl up with him at night, keeping him close. It doesn't matter that Jaskier takes on half the responsibility for Ciri and treats her like his own daughter and is practically her second father, either.

It doesn't matter.

If he keeps telling himself that, he'll start believing it eventually, right?

"And what has your omelette done to deserve such a glare?"

Jaskier's tone is playful, and Geralt looks up at him, realizing he's been frowning down at his plate. Instead of doing the mature thing and relaxing his face muscles, though, he just keeps frowning and sticks his tongue out.

"Gone cold, is what it's done," he grumbles. "No thanks to this one being a picky eater," he adds, gesturing with his fork to Ciri, who is currently smearing the banana mush over the high chair tray. A true artist. Gods, he loves the fuck out of her.

Jaskier gasps dramatically, making Ciri giggle again as he turns wide eyes on her, and it takes all of his willpower not to crack and start smiling. "Well, we can't have that! Papa, to the rescue!"

Ciri giggles even more as Jaskier scoops up his plate and takes it to the microwave to nuke it for half a minute or so, and Geralt tries not to let the way he refers to himself as Papa get to him and make his heartbeat stutter in his chest. It's not like that. It doesn't matter.

Instead, Geralt pushes up from the table and follows him, leaning against the counter. "Don't you have work?" he asks, feeling twice as reluctant as he sounds.

Jaskier looks at the clock and swears under his breath, changing the word halfway through to something slightly more appropriate for one year old ears. "Shi-ale pecans! Yeah, I do. Gods, what would I do without you?"

Geralt makes a face at that to hide how happy it makes him to hear it, nose scrunching and brow furrowing, and Jaskier laughs at his expression.

"Like father, like daughter," he teases, and then he's in Geralt's space, leaning closer, closer—

—and then warm lips are against his face, lingering for a single heartbeat at the corner of his mouth before they're gone again and Jaskier is off out the door, waving over his shoulder.

"Bye, dear!" he calls back to them. "See you later! Don't nap all day!"

The door shuts with a soft bang, and Geralt just stands by the counter, staring after his best friend even after he's gone. His mind is blank, full of nothing but the memory of the soft feeling of Jaskier's lips against his skin, the familiar scent of his cologne, the easy way he'd leaned in, like he's thought about doing it before, like he's wanted to do it before, like he wants to do it more—

Geralt startles when the microwave beeps its end. He grabs his reheated omelette on autopilot and takes it back to the table. He stares at it for a few moments, feeling hot in the face, no doubt blushing beet red, and then looks up at his daughter as she makes soft noises to get his attention.

She holds out her hands, covered in banana mush, and says, "Ba!"

"Yeah, princess," he agrees, mouth pulling up in a smile. "I like bananas, too. No thanks to your Papa's obsession with fruit smoothies."

As he starts into his omelette, Ciri going back to playing with the mush on her tray, Geralt thinks maybe—

Maybe it is like that.

Maybe it could even be more.

#the witcher #geraskier #fics.#dadralt & papaskier own my life #dont try to save me just let me drown in softness

397 notes · View notes

comfyswitcherblanketfort · 3 years

Text

My Darling Cat Roommate

lmao this isn’t lambden, as the title may suggest. sorry folks

@stinastar hit me with some feels over and modern roommate au where Geralt just doesn’t know what to do to make Jask feel better and this happened.

Warnings: We go into some Seasonal Affective Depression stuff here so like be careful with that if it triggers you, jask beats himself up a little, mentioning feeling numb at things that usually bring him joy, i swear in this one. I haven’t changed, dont worry lol

_______________________

Jaskier trudged home from work on Friday, exhausted but relieved he had the next week off. He wolfed down the leftovers Geralt had heated up for him and almost fell asleep on the couch before Geralt hauled him up and walked him into his room, where he promptly fell asleep on top of his duvet in jeans and his shoes. Sometime around when early morning coffee workers were getting up he undressed and snuggled under the warm blankets.

When he woke to Geralt making a smoothie he was prepared to launch into a full ‘morning people’ rant, only to check his phone and realize it was 2pm. So, maybe he’d needed rest.

It was still grey enough out that he shrugged and went back to sleep.

When he woke up again it was dark and the TV was going. He wrapped up in his comforter rather than putting on sweats and shuffled out to the kitchen only because his stomach growled when he tried to roll over.

“Morning, Sleeping Beauty!” Geralt called over his shoulder as he floated past with the pasta he’d left in the microwave.

Jaskier just grunted a small “Thanks,” before he disappeared back into his room. He scrolled through various apps as he ate and rolled back into bed.

He might have fallen asleep, he might not, but he certainly didn’t get out of bed until his bladder absolutely demanded it on Sunday morning.

Geralt intercepted him in the hallway before he could make it back to his room, “You feeling okay?”

“Hm? Why?” Jaskier took a moment to respond, staring at Geralt like he’d grown a second head. He knew his hair was probably greasy but he couldn’t look that bad.

“You slept all day yesterday.” Geralt looked like he was diffusing a bomb rather than talk to his roommate, “Did something happen at work?”

Jaskier just shrugged, “I’m just tired.” And a little numb.

Geralt nodded, “I’m headed to the store. You sure you don’t want me to pick anything up for you?”

“I’m okay, Geralt…” he sighed, slipping past his brick wall of a roommate to slink beneath his blankets once again and make himself as small as possible.

It was late January and the Seasonal Affective Depression was in full swing. He should have bought that fucking happy light when it was on sale. Should have bought the Vitamin D tablets he saw last week. Should have let Geralt drag him to the gym a little more when he felt the initial dip. Should have blah blah blah. He thought over every little thing he knew would have helped that he just hadn’t done and sighed, pulling his blankets tighter around him. He knew he wasn’t going to do any of it until it got bad enough that his hair would stick to his forehead once he hit this point. Might as well hurry it along so it could be over with.

Geralt knocked on his door, snapping him out of his mini spiral. He hummed, not even bothering to turn over until he heard the rattle of the doorknob.

“I know you didn’t want anything, but… uh. I was in the bulk section. Got you the peach things.” Geralt’s voice was lower and softer than usual as he raised the frankly massive bag of peach rings for emphasis before he set them on Jaskier’s desk.

“Than-” Jaskier coughed when his voice came out raspy and broken, “Thank you.”

Geralt leaned against the doorframe for a moment, a curious frown on his face, “Bake Off is on in an hour if you wanna watch it.”

Jask forced a smile and shrugged, “We’ll see.”

Geralt pursed his lips and nodded, pausing a moment before pushing off the doorframe, “Okay.”

Jaskier stared at the peach rings for a while after Geralt closed the door. Eventually he compromised with his brain and rolled out of bed onto his knees, waddling a couple of steps until he could reach the rings then launch back to bed.

Normally he would have almost cried with happiness that Geralt had gotten his favorite treat. He loved it when Geralt did little things for him or thought of him enough to give him something, but he felt rather indifferent as he shoved the twentieth peach ring in his mouth.

Without warning his door opened just enough for a plate to appear and be gently set on his desk.

Geralt muttered, “For the sugar high…” before his hand disappeared and the door once again shut.

Jaskier almost smiled when he saw the neatly arranged concentric circles of Totinos Pizza Rolls on the plate. He got to his feet to fetch them this time.

Around ten that night there was another knock at his door that pulled him from an hour long scroll through tiktok.

“Jask?”

“Yeah?”

Geralt held a big grey bundle in his arms, “Do you- Uh. I thought- weighted blanket?” He held his arms out with a hesitant smile.

Jaskier sat up, “But don’t you use it to sleep?”

Geralt shrugged, unfolding the bean-filled blanket and laying it over Jaskier’s legs, “I’ll be fine.”

Jaskier stared at the ceiling for a while after he left, confused by Geralt’s suddenly attentive behavior. He would have expected the grouchy man to enjoy the silence that came with his bad days. For how much Geralt complained about his loud music, he certainly wasn’t expecting gifts.

Geralt left a note in the kitchen Monday morning saying he’d made Jaskier a breakfast sandwich with instructions on how to warm it up without it turning soggy. Jaskier stood in front of the panini press reading and rereading the note as he heated his breakfast like it was in Old English. He ate at the kitchen table this time, annoyed with the crumbs in his bed, and counted up all the little gifts he’d been brought. He could come to only one conclusion.

Geralt was part cat.

He’d stopped functioning and Geralt kept bringing him mice.

He smirked and sent him a quick text, “Thanks for the breakfast. 👌 V good.”

After breakfast, he decided maybe he could change his pajamas, but he stayed tucked under Geralt’s weighted blanket for most of the day. Every now and then Geralt would text him something stupid Eskel or Lambert did, or a meme he found on his break, and every time Jaskier would grin and send back an emoji. Words were out of reach but Geralt frequently only communicated in emojis and one-word sentences. He should get the message.

Jaskier fell asleep around two, really asleep not just the fitful light sleep he’d been having the last couple of days. He was rousted from a dream about a talking panini press by Geralt tripping over a pile of laundry and softly swearing as he tried to right himself without crashing into the bed or Jaskier’s lute.

“Geralt? Darling, what are you doing?”

Geralt finally caught himself and nearly blinded Jaskier with a smile as he straightened up, “Didn’t mean to wake you.”

Jaskier sat up and scratched at his hair, “Yes, but doing what?”

“Oh! Yeah. Uh. I-” Geralt, still grinning, pointed to a small fern in a bright orange clay pot sitting on his windowsill.

“You got me a plant?”

Geralt was practically beaming when Jaskier glanced back at him.

“Has anyone ever told you you’re a cat?”

Geralt snorted, sitting down on the edge of the bed, “You’re feeling better?”

Jaskier tilted his head, “I think so? What makes you say that?”

“You called me ‘Darling’.”

A hesitant smile crept on Jaskier’s face. There was an echo of the usual all-consuming warmth spreading in his chest that he usually felt when Geralt smiled at him. He may indeed be feeling a bit better. Come to think of it he actually wanted to shower.

“I taped Bake Off. If you’re feeling up for a trek to the couch,” Geralt offered, forced nonchalance dripping from every word.

Jask nodded, “Let me shower, then we can finish off the peach rings.”

Geralt’s smile nearly stopped his heart, a sure sign he was nearing the land of the living again, “I got lasagna on the way home too,” he chirped as he jumped up and made his way to the door.

“Hey, Darling?” It felt a little forced and goofy saying the pet name like that, but Jaskier just couldn’t help himself, “Thank you.”

Geralt’s smile softened, “Anytime.”

#listen yall idk who im projecting on more with this one #but the feels are strong and i yearn #geraskier #geraskier roommates #geraskier roommates au #roommates au #the witcher #the witcher modern au #the witcher roommates au #geralt of rivia #jaskier #seasonal affective disorder #seasonal affective depression #cw SAD #depression #thems some heavy tags for something meant to be fluff #that kinda just hits the nail on the head for the fandom tho yeah?#lol #soft geraskier

365 notes · View notes

disabled-dragoon · 3 years

Text

My back pain's starting to flare up really badly again which can only mean that the cold season is rolling in a vengeance and I am not looking forward to that.

So here's a little list of things I like to use to ease the pain because why not. It might be helpful! :

Heat Packs/Hot water bottles- Cannot go wrong honestly. Not for everyone ofc but heat helps a hell of a lot with pain. I have these little microwaveable heat bean bag things that you heat up and stick on the sore spot and they last for hours. It's very soothing. And hot water bottles work well to heat up seats and beds during the night for extra soothing, but they can leak if not fastened properly. And the heat trapped in the duvet might be a bit uncomfortable to sleep with if you're not fond of it, but give it a try if you feel up to it.

Electric Blankets- Often a bit more expensive than a decent hot water bottle or heat pack, but a bit more reliable. They warm up the whole bed/comfortable surface instead of one major spot, and the heat can be set to your liking and will rise gradually instead of being hot almost immediately. I find this is particularly great for knee and hamstring pain. But it could potentially be a fire hazard if left on too long so be wary of that.

TENS Machines/Digital Pain Relievers- Arguably one of the more pricier options, yes, but it works fairly similar to a regular muscle stimulator in that you stick the patches over the affected area and put the machine on a vibration setting you feel comfortable with. You'll feel little bursts of sensation in the area that shouldn't really hurt (not majorly so, anyway; turn it down if you does) but it can be a bit uncomfortable and may need to be reset after cycles end. This is what I mainly use for lower back and shoulder pain and it tends to work okay. Sometimes it's difficult to find the right setting for your pain though. They tend to be portable though.

Deep Heat Creams/Sprays- Essentially over the counter spray on pain relief. Always check the ingredients before you use to make sure there's nothing harmful to you and please follow the instructions carefully. The one I typically use even has braille over the instructions! Not necessarily the most reliable, but a very quick short term solution if you're in the market for one.

#I'll add more if I can think of any #but I did say a little list!#disability tips #actually disabled #disability #disabled #chronic pain #pain relievers

38 notes · View notes

kitchenwitchtingss · 4 years

Text

♥ 𝔸 ℝ𝕖𝕔𝕚𝕡𝕖 𝕗𝕣𝕠𝕞 𝕞𝕪 𝕂𝕚𝕥𝕔𝕙𝕖𝕟 𝕎𝕚𝕥𝕔𝕙 𝕁𝕠𝕦𝕣𝕟𝕒𝕝 #𝟛 ♥

Sweet Cream Buns

This recipe was given to me by a friend awhile ago, and I feel it needs a little more appreciation. They’re super easy to make and are tasty too!

I feel one thing a kitchen witch has to master is their ability to make all sorts of bread. It’s such a staple, and is so versatile. Not to mention how much of a crowd pleaser it is.

This recipe is a tasty bun, that when bitten into, oozes vanilla custard. Whenever I make these, they are gone in the first ten minutes. I tweaked this recipe from one of my good friends who enlightened me on this yummy recipe. I highly recommend you to try these for yourself!

Now in this recipe I will be showing you three fillings that I’m sure you will love!

- Vanilla Custard

- Chocolate coffee cream

- Brown sugar maple custard

Ingredients

For the Dough

1/2 cup all-purpose flour

1/2 cup bread flour

1 cup cake flour

A sprinkle of sea salt

1/3 cup sugar

1 packet of dry yeast

1/2 cup warm almond milk (Or any type of milk)

2 tbsp heavy cream

1 egg

3 tbsp butter

For the Vanilla Custard

5 tbsp sugar

2 1/2 tbsp flour

3 egg yolks

1 cup whole milk

1 Tablespoon butter

Vanilla Bean

Vanilla Extract

For the Chocolate Coffee Cream

6 tbsp sugar

3 tbsp flour

3 egg yolks

1/2 cup whole milk

1 Tablespoon butter

1/4 cup expresso/ brewed coffee

Milk chocolate/ dark chocolate/ Semi-sweet chocolate (Its up to you)

For the Maple Syrup Custard

5 tbsp brown sugar

3 tbsp maple syrup

2 1/2 tbsp flour

3 egg yolks

1 cup whole milk

1 Tablespoon butter

Directions

To prepare: Set your butter and eggs out 10 minutes before you start so they enough time to come to room temperature.

Start by filling a measuring cup with your milk and heat in your microwave for about 20 seconds, or until when you stick a (clean) finger in, it is just warm. If it is too hot, it will kill your yeast mixture. Add your dry yeast in and stir. Let it sit for 10 minutes to bloom.

Next, in a kitchen aid (If you have one) attach the dough hook and mix your flour, salt and sugar together. Now crack an egg into the yeast mixture and add it to the kitchen aid bowl on low speed. Add in warmed cream. Let the dough hook do its magic on medium low speed until the dough is very smooth and elastic.

Add in your butter 1 tablespoon at a time and let it mix until completely smooth. About 4-5 minutes.

Oil a bowl with some neutral oil, or with some butter and place the kneaded dough ball into the bowl. Cover with plastic wrap and place in oven with the light on, or in a warm area.

Leave it to rise for 2 hours, or until doubled in size.

Ok, so now poke your dough and let the gas leak out from the dough. Cut it into equal sized pieces and place cling wrap on it and let it rise for another 15 minutes or more.

In the 15 minutes, now is the time to make your custard cream. On high heat, add your milk and butter and let it come to a boil. Then turn down your heat and whisk in sugar, egg, and flour. Add in your additives (Vanilla, maple syrup. etc.) and mix on low heat until it has reached a thick pudding like consistency. About 6-12 minutes. If you are doing chocolate, here is the time to melt your chocolate in, when it is off the heat. Let it cool completely.

With a rolling pin roll out the pieces of dough and place a dollop of custard in the center. Fold them over and press/pinch the sides together. Repeat the process until all of them are like this.

Place them on a tray and wrap cling wrap over them. Let them proof for about an hour, or until they’ve doubled in size again.

Now with a nonstick pan on medium low heat, place the bun in the pan and cover with lid. Cook each side for about 5 minutes, or until it is a nice golden brown. You can also cook this in an oven. 400 F for 8-15 minutes.

Now your done! Enjoy this hot and cold, they are tasty either way. It will be a little crispy when hot and soft when cold.

I hope you enjoy this recipe!

I love you all! My DMs, mail, and comments are always open!

xoxo, Angel

4K notes · View notes

beautiful-and-terrible · 3 years

Text

dazed ‘n’ confused (part 4)

A/N: just a quick chapter for you guys before i have to put this story on the back burner :( i have an annual essay coming up in school that i gotta focus on. anyway, hope you like the gangs drunk shennanigans

Ship: Rodrick Heffley / OFC

Warnings: underage drinking / drug use, inebriated driving (DONT DRIVE DRUNK KIDS THIS IS A FICTIONAL STORY DONT BE STUPID :) )

---

“If we get caught, my mom’ll kill me,” Rodrick groaned.

“Let’s bounce,” Nicole said, untangling herself from him and grabbing his hand as they ran further into the back yard, looking for an escape route.

“I’ll boost you,” Rodrick said, gesturing to the fence. Nicole nodded, not thinking of a better plan, and wanting to get out of there as fast as possible. She stepped into the make-shift step Rodrick made with his palms, and as she swung a leg over the fence, he pushed her the rest of the way. It wasn’t the most graceful execution, and she ended up landing on her ass with a grunt of pain.

Rodrick also clumsily made his way over the fence - both of them being drunk and high didn’t help their coordination much. “Sorry, are you good?” Rodrick said, clutching his shin, and Nicole waved him off.

“It’s fine, let's just get to the van.”

“Oh, fuck, the van!” Rodrick hissed, “The pigs are totally gonna know it’s mine.” With a big fucking stupid band name written on the side, Nicole reckoned he was right - it was pretty easy to identify, even without the plates.

“I can drive, don’t worry,” Nicole said, already starting toward the white van, creeping between other cars on the street.

“Nikky, you’re as trashed as I am, no way am I letting you drive.”

“Trust me, hot Rod,” Nicole said, slipping her hand into his front pocket and pulling out his keys before he could even blink. As they approached his van, Chris and Ben appeared in the shadows next to them, whispering excitedly as they spotted them.

“As soon as we saw the lights we bolted,” Ben snickered, but Chris looked concerned.

“Yo, I hope Caitlin doesn’t get arrested. There was a lotta booze in there,” he muttered, and Ben smacked his arm.

“You whipped, dude?”

Chris scoffed, “No, I would just feel bad for anyone in that sitch.”

“I agree,” Nicole said, feeling guilty that she couldn’t help Caitlin get out of trouble.

“C’mon, let’s fucking go,” Rodrick said, and all at once the four of them dashed to the van. Nicole jumped in the driver's seat, shoving the key in the ignition with some fumbling, and peeling out from their parking spot across the street from Caitlin’s house with enough force to make even Rodrick proud.

“We’ll make a NASCAR driver out of you yet, Nikky,” Rodrick laughed, whooping as he leaned his head out the window like a dog, the night air tangling through his hair. Ben scrambled up to the front seat from the back of the van, fiddling with the radio before he settled on a station playing “Where Is My Mind” by Pixies. Nicole turned up the volume to its top capacity, concentrating on the road lines in front of her. The adrenaline of avoiding the cops had sobered her up a little, but she was still feeling paranoid from the weed and drowsy from the beer. She drove as slowly as she dared so as not to seem suspicious.

“Thanks for being our getaway driver, Nicole,” Chris said, his words slurring a little more than she had noticed previously. She looked back and saw him chugging a beer in the back.

“Dude, don’t fucking drink while I’m driving! We’re already in deep shit as it is,” Nicole said, turning on to the main street of downtown Plainview. Just a few more turns and they’d be home.

“You’re deep in something, alright,” Ben cackled, and he and Chris high-fived.

“Yeah, six inches deep in your mom,” Nicole shot back, and Rodrick let out an “ooooooo”, pointing at Ben, “Gotcha, bitch.”

Eventually, by some miracle, they made it to Nicole’s street. She hit the curb as she pulled up in front of her and Rodrick’s house, causing all three boys to shriek in unison. Nicole dissolved into giggles, both in relief of finally being out of danger and in reaction to the boys high-pitched screams of indignation.

“She’s an antique, Nikky!” Rodrick said, jumping out of the van to stumble to the front and assess the damage.

“Oh, I’m fine, by the way,” Nicole snarked, and Rodrick suddenly looked at her intensely, giving her a slightly blurry-eyed up-and-down look.

“Fine as hell,” he muttered, loud enough for her to hear, and she blushed, biting her lip to keep from smiling too widely.

“Rodrick, can we crash at your place,” Ben asked, Chris making puppy dog eyes at him.

“Me too - I don’t wanna wake my parents up. Our front door is creaky as shit,” Nicole said.

Rodrick sighed loudly, as if he were being asked to do something terribly inconvenient.

“Yeah, fine. Y’all want mac and cheese?”

The four of them, all drunk and high as kites, looked at each other and nodded in perfect synchronicity.

As quietly as they could for four fucked up teenagers, they snuck their way into Rodricks kitchen. He pulled out a four pack of Kraft Mac and Cheese microwave cups from the pantry, filling them all with way too much water and sticking all four of them, at the same time, in the microwave.

“Dude, can I eat this beef jerky?” Chris asked, rummaging through the pantry.

“They’re my dads,” Rodrick said, as if that offered an explanation. “If you wanna explain to him why they’re gone, knock yourself out.”

Chris slowly put the bag back, looking put out.

Nicole stood next to Ben, both of them leaning on the kitchen counter. Nicole looked over at him, and he looked back, giving her a little smile. He wasn’t bad looking, but where as Rodrick was endearing because he tried to seem cool and really wasn’t, Ben had an effortless coolness about him.

“Thanks for coming with us tonight, Ben,” Nicole said. The alcohol must be making her feel emotional. After all, they had only just met today.

“Aww, Nikky, of course! I never pass up an opportunity for debauchery,” Ben said, giving her shoulder a squeeze. He pronounced debauchery like “de-booch-ery”, but Nicole was too drunk to catch the mistake. Out of the corner of her eye, she saw Rodrick glaring at Ben. Dumbass, he has no reason to be jealous, Nicole thought to herself, and gave him a little reassuring wave by wiggling her fingers in his direction.

“Yo, be careful on this mac, its fucking hot,” Rodrick said, pulling the cups out of the microwave. They still had water in them, and the cheese powder wasn’t fully mixed in, but in the moment it was the most delicious thing Nicole had ever tasted.

“Should we watch a movie?” Ben suggested, and Chris bounced on his toes excitedly.

“Killer Clowns from Space!! Pleeeaaaase! You’ve been promising me for weeks now that we’d watch it.”

Ben sighed, Rodrick rolled his eyes, but Nicole had no opinion on the subject, so she made the executive decision to say, “I’m down.”

Ben and Rodrick both groaned, and Chris gave her a fist bump from across the kitchen island.

“Nikky has taste, sorry guys,” Chris said, looking very smug as he slurped his luke-warm mac and cheese.

They all somehow stumbled up to Rodrick’s room - Nicole belatedly realized she had been dreaming about being in his room for weeks, and now that she was here took the time to really appreciate what was in front of her.

A person’s room can tell you everything you need to know about them. For one, Rodrick was messy, but no more messy than any other average teenage boy. Clothes on the floor and the back of his desk chair, thrown haphazardly over a bean-bag in the corner of the room. There were christmas lights strung from the ceiling, both white and rainbow, that gave the room a cozy vibe that Nicole would’ve never expected from Rodrick.

His walls were mostly covered in band posters, and above his desk there was a cork board littered with tickets of concerts he had been to. Nicole almost seethed with jealousy at the sheer amount and quality of concerts he had been to - Leftover Crack, Pleasure Venom, Less than Jake, and one of Nicole’s personal favorites, Mannequin Pussy.

“You like Mannequin Pussy?” Nicole said, whipping her head around to look at Rodrick.

“That's not the only kind of pussy he likes,” Ben hollered, causing Chris to smack him upside the head.

“There's a lady present, dumbass,” Chris said, and Ben raised his hands in surrender.

“I think you mean that’s the only kind of pussy he gets,” Nicole said, throwing a teasing wink toward Rodrick, who blushed bright red.

“Yeah, they’re good. Romantic is my favorite album,” Rodrick said, scratching the back of his neck self consciously. Ben and Chris started making kissing noises in his direction, and Rodrick threw a pillow at them.

As Chris and Ben fought over who would set up the projector, Nicole let her snooping instincts take over, looking at the other miscellaneous things Rodrick had around his room - empty liquor bottles filled with more lights, a surprising amount of books (mostly graphic novels), a lava lamp filled with miniature rubber ducks, and mushroom paraphernalia. Everywhere. His pillowcases, the tapestry above his bed, and the stickers on his water bottle all had holographic or brightly colored mushrooms on them. She was so absorbed in her investigation she didn’t even notice Rodrick next to her until he spoke.

“Committing it to memory? You might never be in here again,” Rodrick said with a small smirk. Nicole gave him a look out of the corner of her eye.

“I wouldn’t count on it, babe,” Nicole said boldly. She felt the warmth of Rodrick’s hand on her hip, and looked up at him. And his lips. She wanted to kiss him again so badly it was like a drug, her body telling her to get her next fix as quickly and as often as possible. Being in his space, the place he let himself be his most authentic self, was very intimate, even with Chris and Ben still arguing in the corner.

Rodrick looked away shyly, squeezing her hip once before turning back to the boys. Chris had evidently lost the rock-paper-scissors match to set up the movie on the projector, and was adjusting the screen on the far wall of Rodrick’s room, trying to find a website to pirate the movie from.

“If we’re gonna watch this shit let’s do it,” he said, settling himself in the beat up reclining chair he had, arms above his head. He should be illegal, Nicole thought to herself, making herself comfortable on the bed.

Which ended up being a mistake, because 20 minutes into the movie, Nicole was asleep. She felt a blanket being gently placed over her before she was dead to the world.

#rodrick heffley #rodrick heffley x reader #rodrick heffley x original female character #rodrick heffley fanfic #rodrick #diary of a wimpy kid #greg heffley #emo #rock #band #emoband #ratpack #summer #summer romance #fanfiction #rodrick heffley fanfiction

70 notes · View notes

feral--bog--witch · 3 years

Text

I don't know if anyone of my mutuals are from Texas but here is a really good list of winter survival tips from a lady who lives where it gets to be -40C (up to -55C sometimes).

Layer your clothes.

Start with leggings or skin tight pants, then put sweats or another fuzzy type pant over top of that. Put on a tank top, then a t-shirt, then a sweater, then a coat. Same with socks. Layer your socks as well. HOWEVER do not put so much on that you start sweating. If you start sweating you MUST remove a layer to where you are warm but NOT hot. If you get cold while you are sweating, it negates all your layers and you WILL get cold faster.

For going outside without winter gear.

Do the layering and if you have wind pants or a wind jacket (waterproof outer shells can work too), put that over top of your clothes. Its not rated for cold weather but it will keep the wind from cutting through you which is a big thing that can affect your core body temperature. The wind will be freezing and it won't take you long to get freezing as well if it can cut through your clothes.

For your feet, water proof foot wear but NOT rubber boots. Those will make your feet freeze.

And for gloves, if you don't have any, you can make some quick ones out of socks but you MUST put them on BEFORE you go outside otherwise it negates the reason for them. They KEEP you warm, not MAKE you warm.

Also remember leggings can be doubled as a scarf and you can and will lose heat through your head so wrap it up or wear a hood.

What to do if you think you have frostbite.

You can tell if you are frost bitten due to the fact your skin will kind of go numb and you can no longer feel it. The worse it is, the more you can't feel. Now to warm that area back up once you are safe inside DO NOT USE HOT WATER! This is imperative. You WILL cause second or third degree burns because you can't tell how hot it is. Start with tepid water and rub the area vigorously while you run water over it or hold it under the water. Increase the temperature slowly over time. Another point. This WILL hurt. It will hurt A LOT but you need to keep going. It hurts because your nerves are thawing out and you are regaining circulation. This is normal and GOOD. If it hurts you know the area is slowly thawing out.

If you don't have access to water, rub the affected area a lot, massage it and work the skin and muscle. The friction will slowly thaw it out through heat and you will need to keep doing it to ensure it thaws out completely. Once again this will hurt but you need to push through it to ensure you retain functionality of that area be it your hands or feet or fingers or toes.

What do do to prep your house for freezing temps.

First thing you need to do, especially because in the south your houses are not built for freezing temps is to drip your taps. All the taps in your house should be dripping hot and cold water. This will prevent your pipes from freezing.

Also open your cupboards under your sink to help prevent the pipes from freezing. If you are concerned about it still freezing you can use cardboard to wrap them, it's not the greatest for insulation as it's not built specifically for it but it will work in a pinch to keep your pipes from freezing. You can also wrap some cotton batting around them BEFORE you do the cardboard to insulate even better.

Then we move onto draft proofing your home. If your house is drafty it will get cold VERY quickly, especially when you have freezing wind blowing. So for your windows, hang dark blankets up to cover the windows, this will help prevent drafts and the darker colour will absorb heat that will be help keep your house a touch warmer.

For your doors, roll up towels and put them at the bottom of your doors to help stop drafts from coming in or out. If you are leaking around the edges, if you have it, staple double over plastic to over hang the door to isolate the draft to the door itself. If you don't, hang a blanket to cover the door completely. This will block the draft and keep the cold from coming in and the heat from escaping.

What do do if your power goes out.

First thing you are going to do is bring everyone into a single room, if you can centralize the room to be in the middle of the house, that's even better as the cold will take much longer to reach it. As you do that, close all the door you can and then you are going to amp up your space to help retain heat. So you are going to cover the door with a blanket and you are going to bring as many blankets as possible into that space.

You are going to stay there with everyone and eat and sleep in this room TOGETHER. Your body heat will keep the room warm and if you insulate it properly it will retain that heat. If you notice a wall is super cold, hang a blanket up on it, if you notice a draft, stuff it with a towel or hang a blanket up on it.

You want the room to be as insulated as possible. And yes I include pets with this so bring in their food and water dish and if it's a cat bring in toys and their litter box.

For light, use flashlights or camping lights. If you have kerosene lamps use those, but generally use candles. Make sure they are high off the ground, not where they can tip over, and make sure they have a plate or a tray underneath then so that if they DO tip you won't catch anything on fire or get wax every where. Remember that crayons can be used as candles, and if you shove a candle in a can of Crisco that shit will burn for like six days straight. Also if you have an orange, cut it in half, take the pulp out, pour in a little cooking oil into the half a peel (make sure the flash point of the oil is high so it doesn't catch fire), and then stick a small candle in the middle, this will give you a large amount of burn time for a small candle.

For heat. There are several methods you can use to heat up a space, one is you take a tiny can, put a toll of toilet paper inside of it, then you dump isopropyl alcohol (min 70%) over the roll until it's soaked, and then light it on fire. This will provide both light and heat for several hours.

If you want to double that heat, take a terra cotta pot or a metal pot and have it slightly over top of the can. NOT covering the fire but resting slight over top of it so the rim of the terracotta pot or the metal pot it level with the edge of the candle. If you have several of those, you will heat the space rather quickly.

If you have a woodburning stove or a fireplace, then use that! Just make sure you have your chimney unobstructed donut draws properly and for all burning types of heat ALWAYS HAVE A CARBON MONOXIDE ALARM. If you DON'T then make sure your space is ventilated.

Also never fall asleep while the fire is going. So candles, your little flame heaters, ect.

Keeping yourself warm at night.

The absolute BEST blankets to use to wrap up in are sleeping bags. Use them on-top of all your other blankets and they will keep your heat in so much better than anything else. They are specifically designed for colder weather and keeping you warm.

Keep your feet warm. The best and easiest solution to this is to make a 'bed rock'. Back in the old times people used to warm up rocks and stones and stick them at the end of their bed underneath their covers to keep them warm. We can mimic that by using hot packs, so those little plastic bean filled baggies that you warm up in the microwave. Pop those into the microwave for two minutes and stick them at your feet under your blankets and you will have warm feet for up to three or four hours.

If you don't have a heat pack, that's fine! You can make one with a sock, rice, and a hair elastic. Fill your sock with rice, tie it closed with the elastic and there you go! Homemade heat pack (I actually made one this winter when our power went off. It makes a WORLD of difference.)

If you are stuck outside in the freezing cold (and can't get into a shelter).

Layer your clothes and if you are still cold, crumple up newspaper and stick it between the layers. This will act as a insulator to keep your body heat in. You need to stay warm. It's easier to stay warm than it is to warm up.

Try and get access to a tent and a sleeping bag will increase your chances of staying warm. You need shelter and a tent with a sleeping bag is the best way to do that. If you have shelter you can survive but if it's snowing do NOT let snow accumulate on your tent. This can block air flow and can cause your tent to collapse.

Sleep on something that protects you from the ground. Even if you have to layer cardboard to keep the cold away from you, do so.

If you have no shelter, you can make one using cardboard boxes. Find a large box if you can, then a smaller one that fits inside of it but still fits you. Once you have them, find a place that is sheltered from the wind and then place your boxes so that the opening it towards the shelter and then shove crumpled newspaper in the space between the boxes to provide insulation and while it's not pretty, it will work in a pinch. If you want too insulate it more, put plastic over the boxes and then pile snow on the sides and a thin layer on the top. This will insulate your shelter as snow acts as a great insulator.

Buddy up. The more people you find the more heat you can generate. Never be alone out in the cold. It's easier to fall asleep when you shouldn't and you won't have someone else there who can help you if you need it. Have at least someone else with you if you can manage it.

Never go to sleep cold! If you are warm you can stay warm but you can't warm up if you are cold. Doing jumping jacks, rub your legs and arms, do whatever it takes to get warm before you go to sleep.

If it's super cold out, keep moving and find public spaces that are open to get out of the cold. Sometimes it is too cold for you to stop and sleep. You might want too but you can and will die if you do. The cold will kill you quickly and it is better to keep moving to keep yourself safe and awake. If you can find open public buildings, like 24 hour laundry mats or libraries or other buildings like that. Go in to get warm as best as you can and if you can sleep there, do so but you cannot sleep outside if it's too cold.

Stay safe.

This is the biggest piece of advice I can give you. This cold snap is horrible for people who have never experienced it before so stay safe and stay warm. Im worried for you, I'm used to this, you aren't. I love you all and stay safe!

#texas snow storm #texas #survival #survival tips #please boost #please interact #cold weather survival #tips and tricks #texas is frozen #get this to where the people who need it can see it!#stay safe #stay warm

119 notes · View notes

amerrierworld · 3 years

Text

Supposed To Be

Ocean’s 8 fanfiction

request: the reader finds out what Tammy does at party with the girls and maybe gets angry at Tammy for not telling her and lying to her. Then hets angry at everyone else and they all fell guilty. And maybe tammy says something that’s losses the reader of more. Then the reader walking out. The next morning the reader is ignoring all the texts and calls from Tammy and the girls. Tammy going over to talk to her...

Summary: Tammy is planning something for you with the team, but can’t let you know about it.

Characters: Tammy x fem!reader, the Ocean’s girls, (divorced!Tammy)

Word Count: 2,550

Warnings: Angst angst angst angst angst angst!!!!!! Miscommunication!! Hurt & comfort! Eventual happy ending :)

You first started feeling uneasy when Tammy’s text responses went from excited paragraphs and emojis to one-word answers. It was such a simple thing, but you barely got to see her in person some weeks, and this was the only thing that kept you connected.

After an inevitable divorce, Tammy moved to the city to be closer with the entire group, sharing custody of her children every other week. It had been stressful, but you had been there for her every step of the way, and a fruitful, happy romance had blossomed.

But now, even after all those months, there was a sudden barrier you couldn’t seem to get through. Her phone calls were hasty, her texts short, and no one else in the group seemed concerned like you were. You got no updates on her kids, which usually she couldn’t stop taking about. Frankly, it felt like she had gotten tired of you.

So, you shut your phone off and went out for the rest of the day, window-shopping and wandering around the city to get your fuming mind off of things.

On the other side of the city, in Lou’s spacious loft, Tammy had gathered the other ladies, vigorously typing lists on her phone as she paced back and forth.

“Really, Tam, you’re overthinking this! Why do you feel the need to go through all this?” Lou sighed, swirling her glass of rye.

“Because it has to be just right,” Tammy snapped back.

Everyone knew how detail-oriented and perfectionist Tammy was. It was a life-saver for criminal activity and ensured safety for the gang to get through undetected. But sometimes, in ordinary life, it was a bit overkill.

“I really don’t think Y/N needs all this, babe,” Nineball added, lounging in a large, velvety bean bag and a joint between her lips. “Lou’s right, you’re overthinking it.”

“Listen, she’s my girlfriend, and this is my plan. Can you please just be a little bit supportive of this?” Tammy threw her hands up, exasperated.

“Her birthday isn’t for another month,” Debbie pointed out.

“Exactly, I’m already running behind!”

The remaining seven shared a few bemused glances before Daphne handed Tammy a glass of wine to calm down. Debbie sighed, pulled up a chair and reached for the snack bowl.

“Alright, what’s the plan, TamTam?”

You still had one of Lou’s door keys from the last heist, and figured it was the best time to return it. It was starting to get late, and it was a bit of a walk, but you didn’t mind. The fresh air did good for your nerves and bad mood.

You hadn’t seen Lou in ages either, so you figured a quick catch-up was needed too. Not even thinking, you used the key to let yourself in, washed over by warm light coming from inside, and-

Laughter? Music?

You froze. The first person you saw, of course, was Tammy. Your eyes were drawn to her in any room, always. She was laughing, nursing a drink in her hand, chatting with Lou and Debbie, who looked equally as pleased.

There was popcorn popping in the microwave, and the TV was showing a movie. Your heart sank little by little, as you realized that yes, they really had gotten tired of you. You didn’t register the pile of paper and notes on the coffee table, at all.

Lou saw you first, and went a little pale. She registered the keys in your hands were hers, and it clicked in her brain why you were there. She nudged Debbie, who immediately turned off the music, as if they’d been caught doing something illegal.

Then Tammy turned her head and saw you, her beautiful smile fading away instantly. Her mouth hung open a little, as if she didn’t know what to make of you standing there, in the flesh.

Suddenly your confusion melted into anger, and your heart broke little by little as they stood there, staring at you, not even bothering to say anything.

You tossed the keys to the floor, turned around, and slammed the front door shut.

No one was moving. Tammy’s brain was lagging, still trying to register why you looked so distraught, so betrayed. The rest of the group eyed her shyly. Constance had a mouth full of popcorn that she was afraid to chew down on because of how loud it would be in the silence.

“You fucking idiot,” Rose was the first to speak up- Tammy was shocked to hear her swear. “What’re you doing jus’ standing there? Get out and go after her!”

“Yeah,” Amita said, “she didn’t look too happy when seeing all of us.”

“Did you tell her where you would be today, Tam?” Debbie questioned her, looking her squarely in the eye. Tammy bit her lip, and shook her head. Cue a collective frustrated groan.

“Tammy, we love you, but you can be so stupid sometimes,” Lou said, grabbing her glass from her. “Go on!”

Tammy nearly stumbled over her heels as she hurried after you, fearing she wouldn’t be able to find you in the dark.

“Y/N?” she called out, frantically looking out as the door closed behind her. She spun around, looking left and right. “Y/N!”

“Stop yelling,” you snapped. She turned and saw you leaning against a streetlamp, face washed in eerie light.

“You’re still here,” she said, relieved.

“No, I’m just waiting for a cab,” you said, not meeting her gaze. “You should go back to your party.”

“Do you want to come inside?” she asked you, wringing her hands.

“No, thanks,” you said, shoving your hands deep in your pockets. “I wasn’t invited, so.”

“Oh, Y/N, I didn’t mean to-,”

“No, no, you clearly did,” you shook your head, interrupting her. “It’s fine, really. But next time you get sick of me, have the fucking courtesy to actually break up with me, please?”

“What are you talking about?”

“You’re barely answering any of my texts, and every time we talk you’re miles away. And now you’re throwing a party with the whole team, except for me. What gives?”

“It’s not what you think!”

“What the hell am I supposed to think, then? Do you even realize what the past few weeks have been like for me? Jesus, Tammy, I’ve been worried sick.”

Tammy didn’t know what to say. She didn’t want to lose you, she knew she couldn’t lose you, but to explain the plans and explain everything she’d prepared would ruin so, so much.

“Y/N, I love you with my entire heart. I can explain, I promise.”

“No, forget it,” a cab pulled up to the sidewalk and you yanked open the door. “Come back when you’ve made up your mind, I guess. Unless it’s something I don’t want to hear. Bye, Tammy.”

With that, the cab sped away, and you left a stunned Tammy standing on the sidewalk.

It was nearly two weeks later. You didn’t know how on earth you got this far without talking to Tammy at all, but you figured you made it clear where you stood. If she never talked to you again, you understood the message, and you were through.

A bit overdramatic, maybe, you wondered? If it was, you weren’t prepared to be the first one to cave. You wouldn’t go begging and crawling back to her. You were too stubborn and proud- even with the constant crying over the past few days.

You were sitting at a bar, drinking a sweet and fruity drink while watching some mindless sports game on the monitor when a familiar blonde slid into the seat next to you.

“Go away,” you said, not looking at Lou. She waved her hand, and the bartender set to work on a drink for her.

“Good evening to you too, sweetheart,” she said.

“What are you doing here?”

“I could ask you the same thing. This is my bar after all,” she received her drink and took a big gulp, leaning forward on the bar and looking over at you.

“No it isn’t,” you frowned, trying to piece your memory together. “Your club is dozens of blocks from here.”

“Yeah, and then I bought almost every bar and club on this side of the city. You’re looking at one rich-ass owner, Y/N.” Lou grinned, but you couldn’t be bothered to return the smile.

“Well, congrats Lou. No need to rub it in. Some of us are meant to just be broke.”

“Since when did you become such a downer?”

“Uh, since my girlfriend decided her life was better off without me?” you scoffed.

“Is that really what she said to you?” Lou asked, blue eyes piercing. You shifted in your seat.

“Not exactly, but I know when people are tired of me,” you muttered. “Walking in on the whole team who went through hell together having a party without me kinda sends a clear message.”

Lou chewed her lip, and sighed. She pushed the empty glass away from her and took her time to unwrap a stick of gum.

It was quiet between the two of you as she got up and straightened her jacket, flicking her bleach blonde hair away from her eyes.

“It wasn’t a party, Y/N,” she said. “Talk to Tammy. She’s been absolute shit the past week.”

You bristled, not wanting to think about Tammy again. But Lou left you to it, paying for your drink, and headed out the door. You rubbed your face, tired, and lonely, and cursing yourself for letting it get this far.

Hesitantly, you took out your phone, reading the ‘six new voicemails’ notification, and lingering your finger over the green listening button. All from Tammy.

“Hey, Y/N. Giving me a taste of my own medicine, huh?” A weak laugh. “I’m sorry for not responding or talking more with you.. you have every right to be angry.”

You got up and headed home slowly, going through each voicemail carefully, listening at least twice.

“God I don’t even know where to start. It’s been so... empty without you. Please call me soon? There’s so much I want to tell you.”

Turning multiple corners, you put on your sunglasses, hoping it would hide the tears threatening to spill over.

“I feel terrible. And the girls are mad at me for letting you get away. Not-not like you ran away, but- but not fighting for you, you know? For such a stupid, stupid reason too. I, uh, hm... I miss you.”

I miss you. You stared at your front door, listening as the voicemail ended, frozen. You were mere steps from getting inside, but there was something in the way.

Tammy looked over her shoulder, standing on your doorstep, and you nearly burst into tears all over again. She was startled just like you were, surprised to see you there.

Your arm dropped limply to your side, voicemail forgotten, and you took a shaky breath,

“I miss you too.”

You sat across each other awkwardly. You offered her a cup of tea, she politely declined. Tammy was carrying a large tote bag with things inside, and you were intrigued, but didn’t make any effort to start the conversation. You would remain stoic, and not cave. No matter how beautiful she looked, how rosy her cheeks were, how done up her hair was. But there were giant bags under her eyes that you could not ignore, and something pulled at your heartstrings.

“You look well,” Tammy said, smiling weakly.

“No I don't,” you replied. Her face fell. “Neither do you.” Ouch.

“Crazy what only two weeks can do to a person, right?” she chuckled hoarsely.

She continued, “I realize that... that I didn’t handle things very well, with how it ended.. on the sidewalk that night.”

“Hmm.”

Her fingers were shaking, and your resolve nearly crumbled. She reached into the bag and grabbed a massive binder, nearly bursting with the amount of pages. Your name was written in thick letters on the front.

“This is why I wasn’t talking to you,” she muttered, bashfully. “And I realized that keeping this a secret from you isn’t worth the risk of losing you.. like, actually losing you and never getting to have you in my life again.”

Your mouth fell open as you turned to the first page. It was one of those massive wedding planner books that some young girls like to have when dreaming of their future wedding.

Only it was for your birthday. Lists and lists of your favourite music, your favourite foods, restaurants, colours and clothes. Plans for venues, DJs, special outings and reservations. Plans for each member of the team to take care of little things; drinks, dances, meals, performers...

“Oh my god,” you whispered.

“It was going to be your first birthday with the two of us really together. It was supposed to be a surprise... perfect and special. I guess I went a little over the top..” she rubbed her neck with her hand and blushed.

“Tammy... oh my god,” you kept saying, with every new page, and new intricate lists and ideas. “Oh my god.”

“This is incredible,” you breathed, tears falling freely now. “I’m so, so sorry.”

“No no, I should be the one apologizing,” Tammy replied firmly. “I should have told you.”

“But then it wouldn’t have been a surprise! Oh my god, I should have been more trusting in you,” you cried softly. “Tammy, oh, god. Tammy, I love you so much.”

Every detail was spot-on. She knew you inside and out, like no one else ever knew you. No one had ever cared so deeply for you, to think so deeply for you.

Now Tammy was crying too, and you were two blubbering messes, clasping hands across the table and spilling tears on the pages. Thankfully, they were laminated.

“I’ve scrapped it all,” Tammy confessed.

Your head snapped up, “What?”

“Well, when I say scrapped.. I rescheduled it for next year.. I didn’t think that you would want this anymore. Not after what I did.”

“Debbie thought it a good idea to just move it to next year, in case you still wanted it, and.. well, in case you and I are still...” she cleared her throat, face red, not wanting to finish her sentence for fear of jinxing it.

You pushed your chair back and walked over to her, cupping her face and kissing her sweetly. She melted in your touch.

“Of course I’ll still want it,” you said, brushing her mouth with your lips. “I want you.”

“So-, are- are we o-okay?” Tammy’s breath hitched with increasing sobs and you kissed her, again and again.

“Yes, yes, yes,” you laughed, kissing her tears away. “I don’t want anything except you.”

“Good,” Tammy giggled, “because I don’t think I had anymore energy to finish these plans.”

“When did you start making this?”

“About a month ago.”

“Oh, Tammy, my God,” you threw your head back, understanding why she had gotten so distanced now. “You can’t possibly think all of that-” gesturing to the thick book, “would be possible to plan in just a few weeks right? Not with your perfectionist habits, at least.”

“Hey,” Tammy warned, but her eyes were twinkling.

“Plus, I love every single detail you put in there, I swear, but I don’t need anything except you and the people we love on my birthday. Seriously.”

“Good, because that’s exactly what Lou offered after she slapped some sense into me,” Tammy confessed. “A party at her loft or one of her clubs? And then.. cake?”

“Yes!” you clapped your hands. “Our friends, and cake.”

You slid forward to sit in Tammy’s lap and pressed your warm face in her neck, kissing her there and hugging her closely.

“That’s all I need,” you murmured. “That’s how it’s supposed to be.”

Tammy let out another sob, wrapping her arms around you tightly and kissing the side of your head, nuzzling your hair without abandon.

A/N: A bit longer than usual but I wanted to do the lovely request justice :D Miscommunication is such a bitch... especially when it doesn’t work out, but in this fiction land it does!! We love soft!Tammy~

#tammy #tammy oceans 8 #tammy x you #sarah paulson #sarah paulson x you #sarah paulson character #wlw #lgbt #lgbtq #lgbtqia #ocean's eight #oceans8 #oceans 8 #oceans 8 fanfic #ocean's 8 #cate blanchett #Sandra bullock #fanfiction #merry writes

118 notes · View notes

renjunfromthestars · 4 years

Text

one last time

Pairing: Haechan + Reader

Genre: Angst, smut? suggestive, fluff, established relationship

Song recs: Lose by Niki,Pluto Projector by Rex Orange County, Sofia by Clario

Warnings:

Word Count: 2.9k

Summary:

Sometimes, just loving each other isn’t a reason to continue being together.

Life consists of moments, and some people are only meant to stay in your life for a moment.

___

September (Now)

When you wake up, it’s breaking dawn. Despite the layers you’re tangled in, it’s still cold in the little one bedroom apartment you share with Haechan downtown. There’s an obscene amount of blankets for the sheer size of the bed; the air condition has been blasting too low for weeks, and neither of you have bothered trying to turn it off.

The kitchen sink has clogged up a couple days ago, from the buildup of grease or a stray utensil you don’t know—just that the dishes have piled up, and much like the thin balance that holds you and Haechan together, are on the verge of collapsing.

You question if he still lives with you out of fear of being alone, but you know the answer has always lied in the thin white sheets of the empty two sized bed when you wake up.

Even so, during the rare moments you wake up early enough to see him next to you, there’s an unspoken wall split down the white sheets, and you haven’t really kissed each other in weeks.

As your eyes dart around the room, what should really be considered evidence of your relationship seems old, like artifacts, untouched for centuries. The picture frame that once graced the nightstand, trapped in the crevice between the wall, the 70-millimeter projector Haechan bought you for christmas, back in the box, collecting dust and untouched.

It’s another day, another changing of the seasons, and you’re still looking for someone to blame, but it's hard to point fingers at someone who isn’t there.

It’s hard for Haechan to do wrong when he hasn’t been doing anything. So maybe it’s you that make the moments alone feel so long, as you find yourself waiting for just the click of the door opening, a call, a note, a kiss, anything. And maybe one day, if you try hard enough, you’ll find something out of nothing.

But right now, as you hear shuffling and the click of a door, you know he’s only leaving the apartment again.

September (Before)

It’s bittersweet when the last hints of summer fade into fall, but when you make your way up the stairs and finally drop the boxes on the floor, you don’t mind it as much as you thought you would.

“It’s so spacious.”

“You don’t have to lie, Channie.”

“No I’m serious.”

“First of all, you’re never serious, and second of all, it’s only because it’s empty and we haven’t unpacked.”

He seems so excited and you can’t blame him, you’re excited too. A place to finally call your own, even if it was the size fit for a Keebler elf.

As you work on opening each cardboard box, Haechan digs in, taking your things out of the box, organizing them. When you’re finally done, you plop on the couch, resting. When you look over at Haechan he’s focused, with a little drop of sweat traveling down his face as he puts up the curtains.

Christmas (Before)

“Well, it has character.”

“You don’t have to lie.”

The thing in question, being the little Christmas tree Haechan dragged in despite your insistence that one wasn’t necessary. It’s frail, evidenced by the way the weight of the star bends the tip of the tree, and the firs that branch out from the trunk are discolored. It’s so dry, you think, if you snap the tree in half and start rubbing the sticks together, you could start a fire. You rather not be arrested for arson, so you just sigh. It is kind of endearing, but you’d never admit it.

“And now we wait for Midnight,” he declares, wrapping his arm around you. “so I can kiss you in celebration.”

“I think you’re confusing Christmas with New Years.”

“I figured you’d be difficult,” he shrugs. “You’re always worried about something,” he begins, rummaging in his pocket. “Loosen up it’s Christmas, our second one.” When his hand finally leaves his pocket, there’s a small bunch of mistletoe haphazardly attached to a string. He lifts his arm, and it dangles just above your heads.

“You have to kiss me now.”

“I’d kiss you regardless-”

“Shut up.” With the swift movement of his head, he presses his lips against you.

It’s Christmas, and you don’t have a lot of money. It’s Christmas, but you have Haechan, and that’s all that matters.

…

“Where did you get this, anyways?”

Haechan scratches the back of his head. “I dunno.”

“Don’t even try lying to me, I’ll get it out of you eventually.”

“It’s not lying if I withhold the truth,” he says stubbornly, and you roll your eyes as you adjust the focus of the screen.

“No seriously, this is a really nice projector. I don’t think we could’ve afforded something like this if we only ate rice and beans for a month.”

“I don’t understand why it matters.” he says nonchalantly, chewing on the last of the popcorn

“It matters because rent is due next week, and we’re almost short because of the heating bill.”

“You worry too much.”

“And you worry too little” you interject.

“Not when it’s about you.” he responds, and your face softens.

He opens his arms, and you crawl into them. You’ve been stressed with work lately, he knows.

You’ve always talked about getting a projector, and how cool it would be (“We could have movie nights!”) but knowing you, you wouldn’t ever drop money on one to buy it for yourself.

It’s the last of his graduation money well spent, just to make you happy.

New Years (Before)

You don’t know if it’s the twinkling lights, or the atmosphere (or the champagne) that has you feeling this way, but you’re feeling quite warm and fuzzy.

You trip and nearly kiss the floor on the way to the snack table when Jaemin catches you.

“Woah woah woah there, easy. Looks like someone’s had too much to drink.” he teases, reaching across the table to grab a napkin. Some of the champagne from his flute spilled onto your dress, and Jaemin dabs a napkin apologetically.

Renjun glances to his side and gives Haechan a little tap, pointing to your hunched figure. Haechan sighs, and makes his way to you.

To the average bystander, it's an innocent display of chivalry as Jaemin links his arm around yours and you lean on him, searching for a place to put you so you won’t cause anymore trouble, but Haechan can’t help but feel a little, pissed off? Peeved, jealous even.

“My dress,” you grumble, and Jaemin only laughs. “It’s okay, you still look pretty y/n. You’ve always been.

Yes, you do look pretty tonight, Haechan knows, and when you’re back in his arms, he whispers to you that you’re going home.

...

You’re breathless when Haechan scoops your legs from right under you, disregarding the heel on your left foot you still haven’t taken off.

“Too slow.” he huffs, and you can only wrap your arms around your neck in support when he impatiently shakes your body slightly so that your shoe falls to the floor.

When he finally makes his way to the bedroom, he plops you front first. The bed feels so comfy, but you snap back into focus when you hear some rustling, then the familiar clank of the metal of a belt hit the floor.

When you turn around, he wastes no time kissing you, and you almost forget what you wanted to say.

“We didn’t even-” Haechan begins to slide his hand under your dress, interrupting you. “Even see the ball drop” you manage to gasp out.

“Does it matter?” he hums. Your strapless bra is yanked right out from under you, and any resolve you had to press the topic any further goes with it.

“It is so bad that I want to spend some quality alone time with you on New Years?”

He’s so worked up it’s almost comical, and he makes it a point to fuck you so that you’ll be feeling it for the next week, but you’re not complaining. It’s quality alone time after all.

Spring (Before)

If they say March comes in like a lion and out like a lamb, then your sanity must have left with it. You get a job promotion, and Haechan well, finally finds a job after months of searching. Haechan’s excited, you’re excited, money isn’t as much of an issue anymore, and you couldn’t be happier.

With your newfound responsibilities, you find that it’s hectic at work, so you’re hardly home when he is. When you are, you find yourselves too tired to do anything but stick a frozen dinner in the microwave, and call it a night. But when you can, you try to set aside a day to eat together, to do something.

It’s difficult at first, but it’s okay, because change is arduous, and it’s okay, because you have each other.

You try your best to call during lunch breaks, but even then, the calls get shorter, and spending time together becomes an afterthought. The time you do spend together is awkward, with strained silences in between that make you think, was it always like this before? You would almost prefer arguing- then you would at least be talking to each other.

Maybe the riff between you two goes deeper than that, then just work on the surface. It’s riddled with doubt, uncertainty. Doubt, when he says he has extra hours he needs to do at the company, uncertainty when you don’t know when you’ll see him next. You don’t need to lose your mind every time he doesn’t call, because he certainly doesn’t. He doesn’t, so you won’t. You shouldn’t have to win his love, right? because you have it. You’ve always had it.

You don’t know when it occurred to you that his laugh began to mean something more to you--but right now, you’re not so sure when you started evolving into strangers.

Summer (Before)

Spring bleeds into summer, and work lets down a little. Haechan has the day off. You let him know you’ll be coming home a little early, and you do, right before the sun sets, groceries in hand.

When you slip off your shoes and hang your jacket on the coat rack, you make your way to the kitchen. As you make your way to the kitchen, you notice the pans on the stove, and the single empty set aside in the sink.

When you make your way to the bedroom, you find him on his back, scrolling aimlessly through his phone.

“Does this even matter to you, if we eat together?”

“Not really,” he shrugs.

You drop the subject.

September (Now)

Maybe at a time you felt free here, but right now, everything about the apartment is suffocating, the blankets, the air, the silence. You bring out the duffel bag you haven’t used since you’ve moved in, and begin to fill it with your belongings. You need to be somewhere, anywhere. Anywhere but here.

Dusk is transforming into evening when you finally see him. He’s leaning against the door frame, with the light of the sunset illuminating the thin wisps of hair that frame his face. In baggy sweats, and your favorite white tee of his, with the tiny hole on the sleeve from wearing it so much (because you liked it, he once said), in the rose tinted light, he’s the spitting image of the boy you fell in love with, the boy you’ve always loved, for the past year, months, weeks. But when you take the time to look closer, he looks tired, with his eyes sunken and hollow. At the edge of the room is as close as he gets, but he feels miles away

“Where did you go today?”

“I was out with a friend,” you lie. You’re always there when he comes home, and that hasn’t changed. But how else are you going to explain the traces of makeup that linger on your face, and the fact that you’re dressed? You didn’t think he’d care enough notice, let alone point it out. You look up at him, but his gaze remains on the floor, shoe digging in the peeling carpet.

When you see his jaw tense and lips begin to part, you see a glimpse of the man who used to hold on to you like you were the last person on earth; he’s lost the right a long time ago, to be overprotective, to ask about your day, like it would make any difference now. It’s when his gaze travels from the carpet, to the closet, the empty hangers, the sweater in your hands, the bag, he stops; it’s finally sinking in.

Baggy sweats, in a white t-shirt with his heart on his sleeve. Messy hair, he looks like the man you’ve always known, always loved, last year, last month. Today, and even tomorrow when you’re on that train going far far away. If you get on that train.

Because you’ve been thinking: Is this what love is? They say distance makes the heart grow fonder, but all you’ve been feeling these days is empty. Even so, after all this time apart, you still feel the urge to kiss him.

“Where are you going?” he looks at you, the closet, the bag.

“I don’t know.”

“You don’t need to lie to me.”

The answer is in your silence, and wordlessly, he walks past you and lays on the bed.

“Come here,” he says, and his body forms a crevice on the bed that hasn’t been there for months.

“I don’t think I should.”

“Please,” his voice breaks, and you feel your plans begin to tear apart at the seams. “Just one last time.”

He knows he can’t stop you from leaving, it’s inevitable, an unspoken end. He can only delay it.

There's a soft crinkle as he wraps his arms around you in your jacket, tightly, almost painfully.

“The truth is, I- I still, I-”

“I know,” you say softly, interrupting him. “Me too.”

…

When you wake up it’s breaking dawn, and you’re tangled in the arms of the only thing you’ve ever known love to be. He looks so peaceful, with the light of dawn shining on his bare face like drops of morning dew catching the sun. He’s still Haechan and you’re still you, but you know things are different now, and somewhere along the way you forgot to tell each other about it.

You hastily get your bag, leaving no room for second thoughts.

As you head out the door, you see a bag of groceries carelessly dropped on the counter, the bag broken. You see oranges, cereal, a carton of eggs all for two. You see your favorite brand of instant coffee, the one Haechan hates, but always buys for you anyway.

It’s bittersweet as the last hints of summer fade into fall, and you mind it. You mind it a lot. You know there will be a time again when everything will fit right in, but right now, everything is falling apart and you can’t look back. Maybe in a different life you both fight all day, but kiss all night. In another universe, things could still be changing too. You could be leaving this little apartment together, on a train maybe to somewhere bigger.

September (Before)

“y/n?”

“Yes Hyuck?” you say absentmindedly, fiddling with his silver necklace as you lay on his chest. You’re both tired from unpacking, and you might be just a little late for work. It doesn’t matter, you can spare the subway fare instead of walking.

“Where do you want to live eventually?”

“I have no idea, but I’m open to anything. I think it would be really cool to live in the city,” you ponder. “but I wouldn’t be able to live there my whole life, you know? What about you?”

“I kinda wanna live in Utah.”

“Utah is really pretty.” you agree. “Airplane tickets are kinda expensive though, trains are cheaper, but it might take a little longer, and I don’t know if I can be in confined space with you for that long.” you tease.

“Don’t lie you love me,” he grumbles. “It just seems so great,” Haechan continues. “It’s rural and the houses are so big and-” he suddenly pauses. “What if we can’t find jobs in the same location?”

“Hyuck why are you so worried about all this? ” You can only laugh at the little frown he makes in response. “We just moved in, and all of this is so far ahead in the future.”

“I want to make your life amazing,” he announces, “I want the best for us so figured I might as well start planning now.”

You’re ready to tease him for his sudden onset of seriousness, for being so out of character. The Haechan you know doesn’t plan; he scarfs down cereal each day in the morning, and throws on the first item he sees-but when you look up at him, his eyes are filled with sincerity—He’s dead serious.

As you sit up you kiss his forehead, cupping his face in your hands. Feeling his cheeks contract as you pull away, he purses his lips.

“Kiss me?”

“Okay, just one last time,” you laugh. “I really need to go now though.”

______________________________________________________________

a/n: I don’t know why but I’ve been writing a lot of sad stuff lately, I hope this one makes sense lmao. Let me know what you think, feedback is always appreciated

180 notes · View notes

greedygreedyphilza · 3 years

Text

the results of the netherrack texture, smell, and taste survey!

95 responses + my own response! this got very long obviously so below the cut it goes

note: to clarify i was thinking of the new texture but any answer thinking of the old texture is not wrong and i love them all so

what do you think netherrack feels like?

- beans

- I feel like it would be similar to impacted dirt. Not quite solid like stone, but still pretty hard. The same vibes you’d get from Mars, yaknow?

- i think it feels like crumbly rock. idk how to describe it. soft-ish

- you know like cracked dirt? maybe somehow more squishy. my perception of netherrack is that it’s just evil dirt.

- that dirt thats like not together like beady gritty loose dirt

- squishy, a bit wet, and hot to the touch. Like felt soaked in hot water.

- rock

- semi-spongy semi-rock. if you know you know

- Like those large stones in Central Park that people climb on, but bumpier and warmer

- like that weird black rubber shit they use as the floor of some parks

- stone bricks but worn down and like chunky if that makes sense idfk but a bit more soft like able to fall apart CRUMBLY CRUMBLY YEAH CRUMBLY

- Hard. The noise is too deep for it not to be. Softer than normal rock, so like compacted sand but not as gritty

- The layer of netherrack that is exposed to open air is hard like rock from the heat and proximity to lava. Break through it and you get a softer dirt like texture that ‘grows’ in clumps like an aggregate fruit (fascinated)

- very very dry and crumbly, imagine oreo crumbs that sap the moisture out of your hands like chalk

- flesh

- Something like bumpy and rough, kinda like bricks

- Sort of like a dry natural sponge. It’s firm with many jagged holes and would probably hurt you if you brushed against it too hard

- river bed sand but not wet but not dry

- A bit greasy, like rocks are clumped together using a not very greasy component but the grease is still definitely there.

- It’s crumbly and warm, I think. Like that volcanic ash stuff. It’s also porous, and kinda makes your hands feel dry after you touch it.

- gravel but made exclusively of tumbled stones and very hot. like hot water when u wash dishes hot. wont burn you but you think “oh thats kinda hot” and do nothing.

- probably very rough

- hot cement

- Sort of like IRL sandstone. Soft-ish rock

- The rubber floor they have on playgrounds. You know, it’s kind of textured and rough but also a little springy?

- If you chopped bricks up into gravel and then the heat melted it slightly and solidified into a Rock

- Limestone

- You know the sorta rough, but soft mats that cover the ground outside playing areas or jungle gyms? Yeah.

- A malleable rock that easily crumbles in your hand to dust, like ash

- firm but vaguely soft, crumbles like chalk

- hot kinda bumpy, not like gravel but like. god idk. like those big clumps of nerds candy you find sometimes at yogurt places

- jagged rocks. not sharp enough to cut anything, just not smooth in the slightest

- concrete but like… Red. yknow

- Depends on which texture. The first one would feel wet and moist with what I can only assume is blood? The red shit that’s leaking from the cracks. The new one looks dry and brittle.

- Rocks, but spongy

- Dry mulch or densely packed flakes of dry skin

- squishy gooey hot gross

- VERY crumbly, like if you tried to climb up a wall of it you couldn’t grip it at all, it would come apart in your hands

- like hot stone the sun has warmed

- Meat, but hard. Like the crust of a honey baked ham. Just a tad crunchy

- The same feeling as slightly freezer burnt beef you defrosted in the microwave and now it’s like both slimey and sticky. It has a slight crunch but feels like walking over a spot you spilled soda and you shoes stick slightly.

- crumbly, but smooth somehow

- Like rubbing your hand over hot rough stones

- Dusty but solid, sandstone like.

- hard rocks

- that rubbery material used for playground surfacing, with all the little granules and very Warm

- a smooth lake rocks but softer and stuck together

- Squishy, not like a sponge but like flesh. Like rock with a slight squishy give to it.

- Almost like talc— world’s softest rock/mineral, because of how fast it mines. Or like… one of those foam play mat tiles, but somewhat scratchier.

- old netherrack? bit like steel wool, more tightly compacted. new netherrack? hot rocks that have melted together and reformed, still a little bit melty.

- Hard, like cobblestone, but more crumbly. Leaves a powder on ur hands that gets under ur fingernails. If u don’t wash ur hands after a long time it burns. Slightly unstable to walk on and unpleasant to step on with bare feet. Actively absorbs moisture.

- rough but not brittle

- slightly damp red clay, it doesn’t stick to your shoes though

- sulfur but not as soft, like in-between sulfur and regular rocks? really soft crumbly rocks?

- coarse sand but with dirt

- Bumpy and soft with a slight roughness to it

- a weird gray line between fairly solid like a rock and crumbly like wood that’s been in a fire

- chalky, crumbles like sheets

- really crumbly rock. kinda soft but not soft enough to break if u stomped on it. ever since i saw the block i always thought 'hm yes. this is how it feels.'

- Squishy- very very squish. Yknow the kind of chunky uncomfy stuffing?? That stuff!!! But compact enough to walk on

- squishy but like firm

- skin but not the outside. like the inside of skin the red part

- Rough stone

- like. Marble I think actually but really lumpy

- like really clumpy dirt. or like you know wet sand? that sort of clumpy-ness but not wet

- 1. it's hot. 2. there are a few hairs. they are not soft. 3. it has some give but it's definitely firm.

- a soft rock! it feels like kinetic sand when it sets in-between your fingers, and you can break up the Big Chunks with a little water to turn it into a paste

- shitty fucking gravel. i bet like you go to kick it and instead of flying through the air for a minute it just cracks. but like if you touch it, the stones hold. it takes a minute for them to burn you, so it's like a game of hot potato. but with rocks.

- rough

- hard marshmallow

- hard/rough and bumpy, definitely like a root

- Slightly squishy rock. Sort of sandy?

- dry scab

- dirt but mean and hot

- sponge

- kinetic sand and lava rocks

- slightly squishy, like how walking on it sounds

- rocks. cobblestone but. different? like on the surface its smooth but its not matte. and with all the rocks like cobblestone (important to note here: i am not that familiar with the old texture)

- smooth rock w/ cracks. very oily

- bumpy and fleshy. Like cobblestone, but instead of stone, its just the flesh of beans

- gravel and chalk

- very smooth gravel

- chicken u left out on the counter for 3 days and now its all dry and hard

- hot, rough, like blacktop left in the sun in the middle of a heatwave

- Very rough but crumbly. The overall stone isn't actually crumbling but you feel a lot of dust and rock pieces fall off if you brush part of the surface of it. (The dust is more like sand)

- okay so like. imagine hard playdough. like really hard playdough. it feels like solid rock when ur just walking on it but if you break the surface of it its soft like putty and holds shape?? so you can makes molds out of it and stuff. its very cool trust me

- Like a mix of obsidian and stone. Smooth boi

- smooth rock

- wet sand minus the wet but not like dry sand. compact and oddly squishy, but like still kinda rough.

- Ummm kinda smooth but with bumps and craters. idk but I got this moon that lights up n I think itd feel kinda like that

- Kinda squishy but still firm. Like cheese. Rlly hot cheese

- coarse dirt and/or hardened mud

- Playground fake mulch: rough and firm but a bit squishy when pressed on

- i feel like since it’s supposed to be the dirt of the nether (or at least it is to me) so i feel like it had a similar texture but more grainy and less put together. as you walk on it you sink into it, it invokes a slight panic the first time someone walks on it. it feels as though it might not hold your weight but it does. a little bit tougher then normal dirt but not as tough as stone. it’s very rough to the touch and if you were to scrape against it too hard or fast it would surely cut your skin. hot to the touch but not enough to burn, more like almost comforting like the warmth from holding a hot drink but it saps the moisture from your hands. the warped and crimson ones feel more put together and you don't sink into it as much as normal netherrack, it feels like moss to the touch

what do you think netherrack smells like?

- beans

- fire

- red

- Sulfur (obviously)

- burning. even if its never been lit thats just its scent

- sulfur

- strangely rotten, like that off smell u get when u know something is going bad but like it smells hot at the same time

- bitter, a bit metallic, just a touch of cordite.

- rotting corpses

- like someone crushed a jalapeno using a rock they got from a parking lot. the la croix of smells: faint, but there is Something there

- Ham that's like 10 days away from expiration but already funny-smelling; only when rubbed. Default smell is that one rock that smells like rotten eggs.

- some sort of smoked meat

- nothing

- smoke. maybe faintly like period blood

- There's a hint of sulfur (of course) but what surprises most people upon chancing to smell the softer netherrack underneath the shell is... slightly. eggy. Not rotten egg like sulfur but... like an eggy dessert. Not quite as sweet though.

- i think it smells the same as when you have a campfire going on a hot day or when you step into a car thats been in the sun for too long

- flesh

- Something that's been burnt

- Nothing until it's lit on fire, after which it smells like fireworks.

- burnt popcorn

- Like ash?

- I think it smells like soil, but spicier.

- like burnt tire rubber

- Smoky coals :)

- BBQ sauce but slightly warm with like chili peppers int here and slightly burnt

- Hot pavement.

- Probably kind of acidic

- Hot asphalt

- Very very burnt, almost like you overcooked toast or popcorn and it takes a while after leaving the nether to stop smelling like it

- The distant burning of a substance not found elsewhere, like tainted minerals bubbling in a furnace coming from your neighbor's window

- burnt toast

- hot. but no probably really bland but people think it smells like this or that due to plants or skin burning on it

- my cooking. completely burnt.

- strawberry

- Netherrack txtr1: rotten and metallic. Netherrack txtr2: probably like warm/hot rocks

- Sulfur, heat, and what I imagine a volcano to smell like

- You know when you turn on your stove and inky gas comes out but no fire ? And then you lean forward and catch a sniff adn your like "WoW! Thats awful!"

- hot brick

- Burnt bacon

- Burnt but like not bad

- Smokey, definitely, but acrid. Like when you're burning green wood. I feel like if you sniffed it too close your eyes would water.

- Over smoked beef and soup thats like a day away from going bad being heated up.

- that smell you get in hardware stores/the warehouse portion of ikea but more ... earthy and burnt

- Warm rock...

- Rusty, Tangy, with a hint of sulfur

- warm rocks

- mild rotting meat honestly

- Brunt dirt

- Vaguely sulfuric, mixed with a hot, earthy scent, like fungus.

- the actual rocks dont smell like much. a bit singed and whatever the antithesis of wet rocks is. the nether itself provides more then enough smoke to inhale

- Sulfur. Sulfur and something burning, somewhat like gunpowder just fired. The smell of explosives but to the left. Warmer, more rank. The smell is faint unless you pulverize it or actively smell it by holding it close to your nose. One of those smells that is strong, but easily blends with other scents instead of smothering them.

- mmm the smell of heat which is definitely a smell you know what i mean.

- the ground after rain with traces of campfire smoke

- rancid, burns your nose so much you cant even properly smell it, hot smell

- burnt bacon and burnt chocolate mixed together

- Sulfur

- burnt...anything really. but like really faint brunt smell, depends on what biome it's in. can netherrack be in different biomes?

- metal smell. like the one that happens when metal comes in contact with skin

- like hot rocks. like the rocks u see in fireplaces. charcoal i think? ive always thought of netherrack smelling like that and idk why.

- Burnt.

- like a semi decaying mushroom. so like. a little gross but enough to eventually desensitized to it

- spicy!!!!! it smells spicy .

- Nothing much, it just caught the smell of fire and smoke from the Nether

- You know when your about to sneeze or it's really hot and your nose is feels like it's slightly / medium burning in pain yes definitely that but like all of the time and also smells like it's a hot day

- h o t

- when you walk past a dumpster behind an elementary school on a hot day

- smoke, but that's just because it's in The Nether. if you like, let it sit out for a couple of days and then smell it it'll smell like the sun

- probably like a dirty grill y'know? like you just made the world's fattiest burgers and all that gunk is in the grill? like that but burning. probably bad.

- faint blood or an irl rock

- rot and death

- rotting dead mixed with expired milk

- Sulfur

- blood and fire probably

- by itself it doesnt rly smell like anything, but its hard to divorce it from the smell of brunt pork and sweat

- uhhh smoked wood/ charcoal

- hot rocks. like how somethings hot and you can kind of smell it? like a desert smell? or is that just your smell receptors getting hot and not knowing how to deal with it

- burning oil

- like limestone would, i bet. but like. a very very musty version

- smoke and salt

- ash

- raw meat (bad)

- warm concrete

- Burnt, very very burnt. Just... just literally the smell of fire almost- like the rest of the Nether. It's not very pleasant and you'd likely not want to sniff it up close (unless you enjoy the smell of fire?)

- d. dirt.

- Idk rock probably. Maybe also ironish.

- rock

- Hot Dirt. what does hot dirt smell like? oh, you know ;)

- Big smell. Very big smell. Like charcoal and cinnamon but turned up to ten (maybe a hint of onions cause like if your around it too long your eyes start to water)

- Burnt

- coals on a grill

- Asphalt in the summer

- i think it smells like smoke, but it's stronger and sticks to you like chlorine. you can tell someone has been in the nether recently because of the smell of netherrack (unless they have been in a soul sand valley, then the scent of death follows them). Or it smells like hardware stores like some else said, metallic, earthy, almost smokey. in warped and crimson forests it smells more earthy and way less like smoke.

what do you think netherrack tastes like?

- beans

- dirt

- charcoal

- also burnt tire rubber. dont eat it. its a stone.

- very sour and bitter at first, and then becoming almost repulsively bland. Very bad rubbery texture.

- rock flavored la croix. basically nothing but with a hint of dirt

- Kinda chalky texture, kind of bitter but ultimately not disgusting

- Charcoal

- mmm cronchy brunt rock

- Warm rocks

- hot rocks

- Bacon

- sand with a hint of either artificial cherry, artificial strawberry, or artificial watermelon

- hot brick

- you know when you overcook bacon and it's super crispy and really brunt tasting to where its inedible? that but a sandy texture

- Igneous rock?

- hot!

- raw meat.

- good.

- smokey spong

- dirt in a good way. or sand

- spicy rock :)

- volcanic ash. mixed with like. the bitterest coffee ever. just really bitter.

- you know when you trying to swallow a tablet but you just end up swallowing the water and the tablet is now disintegrating in your mouth and you're just trying to get more water in to get the taste and texture of the tablet out? that

- spicy.

- Stone

- like "crakclckecklcaeckkcle" gravel if it were smooth water rocks (you know those rocks that's like, much cooler when they're wet, and are perfectly oval shaped, no cracks in them), but im sure if u open your mouth and breathe while its in your mouth, it tastes like burnt milk ice cream in the form of smoke hitting the top of ur mouth. Pretty sure if you exhale while it's in your mouth, smoke comes out too, like if you were exhaling a cigarette. Expect its dirty black and not just, smoke.

- sexy yum crunch

- like dirt. but more hard and red.

- To the player who attempts the unthinkable, the taste of netherrack is rumored to be that of rotten flesh. That the consumption of the soft pulpy netherrack clumps beneath the shell tastes of slimy and inedible gray matter, and that to eat it would cause the brain to simply fail at comprehending what the body had consumed. The rumors are false. It tastes, against all odds, like a spicy egg custard. That being said, it should not be eaten in large amounts, as it can make one quite sick and is worth almost nothing nutritionally despite filling the stomach. It can be used to starve off the feeling of hunger in this regard, but gives no sustenance. Source: me, unfortunately.

- burnt dirt

- pop rocks: lava edition. aka hot dirt

- Netherrack txtr1: rotten with some crunch. Have you ever ate rocks as a kid? Well that taste but with putridity. Netherrack txtr2: idk probably like lava rocks.

- nothing good

- spicy, like if you put it in your mouth it's like overly spicy...pop rocks?

- SPICY DIRT. specifically like clay but spicy. if u took the hard shell surface and crumbled it up you could use it as a spice.

- ketchup

- very very bitter, also once wet starting to crumble up

- it's too hot to taste, you're just burning you taste buds. but if it was a reasonable temperature, like coal that's already been used in a fire pit probably

- terrible

- hot and i think like. if you chewed on rocks and when they split apart its just,,, freakin burning

- burnt rubber

- idk but NOT GOOD! LOL

- Dry dirt but no mineral aftertaste

- gravel but if pretended to be coal

- MEATY ALSO. There's a theme of meat with it. A very fatty, unpleasant meat, similar to how people are describing as tasting.

- Gross probably

- ur mom (SLASH JAY SLASH JAY i think probably like burnt tasting but weirdly bitter too)

- Rocks

- Why are we eating grou- /j but the most unpleasant burnt food you could think of

- wet dirt mixed with a little bit of stone

- Hot rock...red flavor

- Salty, bitter, leaving an unpleasant rush of iron on the tongue due to buring the delicate tissue there. In trace amounts, it's not unlike pure malic acid mixed with salt and unsweetened cocoa.

- Gross. The texture is awful. The top layer crumbles in ur mouth and leaves hard rock bits along with sand parts and it's not pleasant. It probably soaks up moisture in your mouth as if you just licked a deodorant stick. It really just tasted like charred rust or rocks or something, not exactly a pleasant feeling. It also probably fucking hot?? Like maybe not actively bringing but it is much warmer than your body temperature (which is why it soaks up moisture in ur mouth). Anyway- overall please don't eat netherrack.. it's just a sandy rock on fire :(

- sand?

- raw meat (bloody)

- sweat, liquid smoke and weird meat

- roasted cashews

- Sulfurous sand

- rock

- Alarmingly bitter and very dry (not like lemon bitter. More like the nail polish you put on so you wont bite your nails but different)

- cat piss and mold

- Blood and rock. Crunchy

- The default taste is copper mixed with granite. Will taste warmer when near lava and the taste will be more distinct. Will taste cold and stale when farther away from lava.

- im not too creative but kind of. okay mostly rocks, just kind of no taste and hot, but with the tiniest hint of. dried pizza? hot pockets? like bread and sauce and herbs.

- Blood and gold

- it's fucking rock

- Specifically lava rocks

- wall paint but more brunt

- its very dry. tastes like sheetrock

- donuts that have way too much oil on them

- Burnt chalk and a dash of rancid eggs (tie back to the sulfur).

- Again, something burnt that would probably make you gag

- legit just cobblestone so like if you ate some rocks

- ...not good

- very very bland. like dirt but instead of being earthy it tastes like hot water

- i actually have eaten hot coals before /srs (don't do that please) but i imagine it's like that but with barbecue sauce on. just hot. you know how things taste like they're burning you? yeah.

- Stone? Burned stone, I guess?

- Burnt

- like a rock, for sure. maybe a bit ashy? maybe like piglin feet? maybe like lava? depends where its from and how long its been there ig.

- Salt and oil and dirt.

- I have never thought about this... probably just grosser, hotter, rocks

- pain

- Very bitter, like very badly burnt sugar.

- grandmas ashes

- Too hot to taste, your tongue just burns and you're left with the aftertaste of your burned mouth and the dame vague acidity of its smell

- It burns your tongue and make your mouth dry, and leaves an aftertaste like eating a hot pepper.

- spicy rock

- Bitter, like really bitter and it melts in your mouth

- flesh or something meaty but like. more like jerky

-r. rocks??? idk i didn't think this far

- red again

- i think it tastes like rocks but it's spicy and instead of making your mouth water it just sucks up the moisture, and it pops in your mouth like pop rocks, and like another person said when you open your mouth you exhale smoke a thick dark smoke like when smoking a cigarette. eating it will kill a regular player but love the idea that piglins will clean it and occasionally use it as a spice in very small amounts because too much can kill them as well unless an immunity is built up

#minecraft #mineblr #netherrack #netherrack survey #this took so long i am so tired #the cursed answers are the best but i also love the people that left me like paragraphs #the last answers in all of them are mine #also might update this if new answers ever come in but not guaranteed

12 notes · View notes

c-estmabiologie · 4 years

Text

nine terrible cups of tea (and at least one equally terrible cup of coffee) | the haunting of bly manor fic

Dani tries to master the art of making a proper cup of tea. It goes just about as well as you'd expect. (1987 - 1994)

Also on AO3!

One

“Really you could just throw a tea bag into your mug, pour some water on top, and call it a tea. But we’re better than that.”

Dani isn’t convinced but she tries her best to follow the steps as Jamie patiently describes them. She talks about making tea with the casual confidence of someone who believes that Dani can will a good cup of tea to exist. As if this isn’t the first time that she has tried to hold Dani’s hand through the process. Dani’s pretty sure it won’t be the last time either, but she tries to wield some of Jamie’s confidence as her own.

“If you want to be really proper, you can even warm the pot first with some hot water from the kettle and, you know, just dump it down the sink.”

Dani swirls the hot water around inside her teapot, feels it warm under her palms. It’s nice. Wasteful, but nice.

“What does this do?”

“No idea. Somebody probably decided that it makes the tea taste better.”

“Okay,” She drops two teabags in. One for herself, and one for the pot, according to Jamie who’s not leaving tea totally up to chance and Dani’s efforts; her arm is soft and cool against Dani’s as they stand shoulder-to-shoulder at their kitchen counter, each with their own pot of steeping tea.

“Now here’s where you might make a mortal enemy of a Brit: adding milk to your cup before or after the tea.”

“Does it have to have milk?” Dani asks, thinking Aren’t there people who drink their black tea black, like coffee? That’s a thing, right?

Dani can feel Jamie twitching a smirk beside her without having to look.

“It has milk if you’re making English tea.”

She remembers the looks she got from Hannah and Owen and even the children whenever she’d made an attempt at tea. She can’t remember when she’d added the milk. Jamie, for sure, must be exaggerating the offense.

"But which one’s the right way?”

“Hmm? Oh, I don’t really care as long as it’s the right amount of milk.” Dani realizes that Jamie’s already gone ahead and poured her own cup without her, milk and all, and she’s missed it. She pours her own tea and splashes in milk until its colour matches the tea in Jamie’s cup.

They look the same to Dani.

“Alright,” Jamie says, “let’s have a taste shall we?”

They taste the same to Dani, but Jamie’s brow furrows just a little as she takes the cup away from her lips. And then she starts laughing.

“Okay, how is that possible? We did the exact same thing!” Dani takes another sip from her own cup to prove her point. It tastes fine! It’s tea!

“I really have no idea, Dani,” Jamie’s still laughing. “You’re just shite at making tea.”

Two

Jamie's been trying to relax with a book in the bedroom when she hears the beeping coming from another room. Just three little beeps, then nothing. A minute later, the three beeps chirp through her focus again.

When it happens a third time, she finally puts down the book to shout.

“What is that?”

“What’s what?” comes Dani’s reply from across the apartment. Then the beeps make themselves known once more.

Then: “Oh. It’s the microwave. I got distracted.”

Owen had bought them a microwave as a housewarming gift. It was a convection microwave, he’d told them proudly, which apparently made it special because you could microwave your food on a metal tray if you wanted. The idea was that they could warm up their takeaway faster, or cook frozen dinners (Owen’s very generous way of chiding them for both being awful cooks). Jamie hated it. It was big and ugly and had faux-wood paneling on the side. She’d rather stick to making burned stews on the stovetop.

Dani appears in the doorway with a mug in each hand. She holds out one mug to Jamie.

“I made you tea.”

“What, in the microwave?”

Dani shrugs and sips from her mug.

“No.”

“It’s fine—”

“Absolutely not.”

Three

It’s a quiet-ish day at The Leafling and, to be honest, Dani is sort of enjoying the peace of arranging flower displays and curling ribbons. The sun is warm through the windows.

Jamie is laid up in bed with some sort of cold. She’s being a surprisingly big baby about it, too, Dani is surprised to realize. Her wife doesn’t like it when she can’t be useful.

Speaking of certain wives who shouldn’t be up, Dani can hear steps coming down the stairwell that connects the shop to their apartment. The shop’s back door pushes open a moment later and Jamie appears with jacket on and her curls stuff up into a hat. She’s pale and her nose is pink and tender-looking around the nostrils.

“What are you doing down here?” Dani demands in her most teacherly voice, but Jamie clearly has plans to go out, not back upstairs.

Jamie’s voice is raspy and hoarse.

“I need to go out to the shops and get some more milk. Ours is off.”

“I had some in my cereal this morning and it was fine.”

Jamie coughs into her collar.

“The date on it’s fine. But I add it to my tea and it’s curdled.”

“Oh.” Dani’d left the tea steeping for her before she’d come downstairs.

Then: “It’s probably the lemon doing that. In your tea, I mean.”

“There’s lemon in my tea?”

Dani nods. “There’s honey in it, too. It’s supposed to help with your sore throat.’

Jamie sighs, then sniffles, then seems to deflate a little.

“I’m gonna be honest: it sounds absolutely disgusting.”

But Dani insists that she at least give it a try (without milk), that it will make her feel better (it does, a little, admittedly), and that, who knows, she might like it (she does not).

Four

Summer heat hits hard, and The Leafling doesn’t have air conditioning. The ceiling fans do nothing more than push hot air around the shop. The plants slump in their pots (which annoys Jamie), and fat houseflies keep finding their way indoors, only to bang themselves relentlessly against the windows until they fall dead on the sills (which annoys Dani). Everything is slightly damp with sweat or condensation.

“This is something my ex-almost mother-in-law used to make,” Dani says, stirring the ice around in the pitcher with a wooden spoon.

“You know there’s probably a less complicated way to say ‘ex-almost mother-in-law’.” Jamie says. Her hair is sticking to her neck, and her gardening gloves feel like they’re being peeled off of her skin as she takes them off.

“She used to make it for my, you know, Eddie and me in the summer when we were kids,” Dani hesitated. “I don’t know. It just always reminds me of the best parts of summer.”

But when she looks up Jamie has a glass and is holding it against her cheek.

“You know,” she says, “I do know what iced tea is. It’s not exactly a foreign concept.”

Jamie is thoughtful as she drinks the tea slowly.

“So,” she says finally. “This is what makes Poppins think of summer.

“It’s kind of a funny taste isn’t it? Cold tea on purpose.”

Jamie gets up and pulls Dani into a hug that’s nice, but not altogether pleasant — their skin clings together and comes apart audibly in the heat and they both smell very strongly of themselves.

“Thank you for sharing it with me,” Jamie says into her shoulder.

“I’m going to go upstairs and put the kettle on.”

Five

“What is it?”

The gift sits on their kitchen counter, out of place and mysterious with its glass-and-stainless steel modernity next to their wooden cutting boards, cluttered and kind of oily spicy jars, and that obnoxious faux-wood panelled microwave.

“Owen says it’s a French press. He was really excited about some Danish company. Said it’s apparently great for beginners.”

Jamie makes a note to herself to somehow ask Owen to stop giving them gifts for their kitchen.

“I didn’t think Owen drank coffee.”

Dani looks thoughtful, “I don’t think he does.”

Owen’s gift doesn’t come with instructions, and neither one of them wants to ring Owen up to ask for help. Dani takes charge, grinding the coffee beans (which Owen had also generously provided) in the spice grinder… and then washing out the grinder and starting again when Jamie points out that the fresh grounds reek of coriander.

They aren’t sure if they’re supposed to give it all a stir once the water’s been added. Or when to press the plunger. Or how long it’s supposed to sit. Their first attempt produces faintly coffee-flavoured water. Their second, a grainy, chewable mess.

The French press gets relegated to a high shelf above the stove, behind a fern. Eventually it will pinch-hit as a flower pot and Dani will love how the glass reveals the root systems buried in the soil.

Six

“This tea tastes weird.”

It’s Dani who says it.

Jamie looks up from the arrangement she’s been working on. It’s wedding season and The Leafling has been swamped with orders for bouquets and table arrangements. Jamie’s been going back and forth on this particular order all week with a bride who seems unhappy no matter how precisely she tries to follow the bride’s vision. Frankly, it’s been pissing her off (the last time she’d come in and rejected Jamie’s work, Dani had sensibly stepped in to take over the conversation before Jamie could get their shop shut down for punching a customer).

“Are you sure you didn’t accidentally drink vase water?”

She picks up her own cup and takes a sip. The milk must have been added too soon and seized up the brewing. The tea tastes like nothing. Dani is watching her.

“Yeah, this is pretty bad.”

Dani says nothing.

“Oh shut up. I’m allowed to have off days, too, you know.”

“I didn’t say anything!” Dani says, but she’s smiling.

Seven

Jamie somehow manages to drink vase water.

Neither of them can explain how it got into her tea cup or where her actual tea had gone.

Eight

“Hey.”

The word is spoken into Jamie’s hairline and followed with a kiss. She smiles, half-awake, and reaches to pull Dani to her so she can kiss her properly. Her hand jostles a tray and something makes a precarious, jangling sound.

“What’s this?” she rubs at her eyes. It’s still mostly dark in the room.

“You’re up early.”

Dani’s at the side of their bed with a serving tray. She’s barefoot, still in her pyjamas and, from what Jamie can tell, still pretty sleepy herself.

"What’s the occasion?”

“No occasion.” Dani places the tray on the bed and climbs in next to Jamie slowly, careful not to tip anything on the tray.

"I just thought it would be nice to have the morning together. I bought scones.” Dani warps her voice around the word in a way that is definitely not the American pronunciation, but just as definitely not a passable approximation of Jamie’s accent. As Dani hopes it would, it makes Jamie smile.

“I see that. Scones.”

“Mm-hmm. And biscuits,” Dani never could manage that one without the secret sort of laugh that says that the Rich Tea biscuit that she’s picking up off a plate will only ever be a cookie to her.

It’s all lovely. The biscuits, the morning, Dani: lovely.

And then, of course, there is the matter of the tea.

A few problems that meet Jamie immediately as she takes a tentative sip. First, it’s cold. Second, even with what looks like an alright amount of milk (Jamie notes that Dani’s been getting better on this front)...it’s bracingly bitter.

She bravely takes another sip to avoid spoiling the otherwise perfectly cozy moment. Something solid dislodges itself from the bottom of her cup and hits her wetly on the nose. Jamie can’t help but splutter a little, and the thing plops back into the cup. It’s the tea bag.

“Uh, Dani?” Jamie realizes that she’s poking a bruise a little here, and Dani looks so happy next to her, breaking off pieces of scone with her fingers.

“How long was the tea left sitting?”

Dani’s brow furrows.

“I’m not sure how early you wake up these days,” she says. “I may have made it… a while ago. Is it okay?”

Jamie gently places the cup back onto the tray.

“It’s just a little on the cool side, that’s all.”

“Oh,” Dani tests the side of her cup with the back of my hand, as if to memorize what a little on the cool side means to Jamie.

“I can just warm it up in the microw—”

“ No. Let’s just enjoy our morning.”

Nine

“Does anyone who drinks this stuff actually enjoy it?”

They’re in bed, limb flung loosely over limb. On the TV screen, a woman sits tensely under a tree while another sticks her bare arm right into a beehive. Bees swarm up her sleeves and into her undone braid.

“I think it’s pretty nice,” Dani says, “It’s peppermint. It’s supposed to be relaxing.”

Jamie curls up against Dani’s chest. She cradles her cup between them, more for its warmth than for any interest in drinking it.

“It tastes like hot toothpaste.”

On the screen, the bee charmer has returned with a mason jar full of honey. She invites the other woman to have a taste.

“Do you think they’re gonna get together?” Dani says. Jamie considers the scene for a few seconds.

“Yeah. But it’s a little weird to go after your dead brother’s fiancée like that isn’t it?”

Her own mug empty on the bedside table, Dani picks up Jamie’s abandoned tea. It’s still warm and it’s left a warm spot on the blankets between them.

“I guess it’s a little weird. I still want them to get together.”

Jamie makes a sound that might be agreement, but her eyes are drifting closed.

She’ll fall asleep before the movie’s over. Dani will fill her in on the details she’s missed over breakfast, before they have to return the tape to the video store.

Ten

“It’s so nice to have someone cook for me for a change,” Owen says, pleasantly. It’s not often that he’s been able to come around to their place over the years (and lately it’s become even less often).

“You’ve always done so much for us,” Dani calls from the kitchen. Something clatters loudly into the sink. “We just want to return the favour.”

Owen glances at Jamie, who confirms with a nod that it was, of course, Dani who had had such a thoughtful idea.

“I’m just nervous to serve dinner to the accomplished chef and restaurateur Owen Sharma,” Jamie says. “I’ll have you know that if it were my idea, I’d have just gotten takeaway and arranged it artfully onto plates. Real plates, of course. Nothing but the best for our Owen.”

Dani comes in then with a tray and busies herself with setting up the table. Jamie clears away the half-melted candles and clutter to make room.

“I thought we could have some tea before dinner.”

The hesitation that hangs in the air is palpable mist off a pond.

Owen clears his throat and politely reaches for a cup.

“Did you make it, Dani?”

“She’s been practicing,” Jamie says, drawing one knee up to her chest and reaching over to get a cup for herself.

“She says I’m not allowed to be a judge anymore. Says I’m biased against her, but really my tastebuds are probably shot. So, you are her lucky new victim.”

They toast to friendships and loves that are never truly lost and gamely drink Dani’s latest attempt at a proper cup of tea.

“You know what,” Owen says after a moment. “It’s not that bad.”

“Really?”

“You hear that, Poppins?” Jamie says, with another half toast of her cup. “You did it.”

“Really?” Dani says again. She takes her own sip, searching the taste for what might have made this brew remarkable. It just tastes like tea to her.

“It’s good?”

Owen and Jamie both make non-committal sounds, but neither do they abandon their drinks.

“It’s not the most amazing tea I’ve ever had,” Jamie admits. “But it’s absolutely, absolutely a decent cup of tea.”

“You know what?” Dani says, “I’ll take it.”

#the haunting of bly manor #the haunting of bly manor fic #dani clayton #jamie taylor #jamie the gardener #dani x jamie #thobm

46 notes · View notes

twokinkybeans · 4 years

Text

Kinktober Prompt Fill #22: Cloned

Find our full Kinktober post right here!

Summary: Peter's nightmares are so bad he just doesn't go to sleep anymore. Tony urges him to go sleep by using his visual hallucinations in their advantage. Warnings: Post Endgame, Tony lives, Adult Peter Parker, Sleep deprivation due to trauma, Hallucinations, Established Relationship

I took some liberties with the idea, because I wasn't particularly inspired today. I really wanted to write some angsty fluff, so there's not /much/ kink in here, but I hope it's enough to keep you beans satisfied! <3 Once again not beta-d, whoops.

-Lien

Read on AO3

One side effect of the Spider-bite that no one ever thought of, was the incredibly realistic and intense dreams that haunted Peter’s nights. Often enough when his alarm went in the morning, he felt as if he hadn’t slept at all. After beating Thanos, the dreams became even more prominent, even more extreme. He’d see all the death and destruction, all the pain, torture and agony. It became too much for Peter to handle, so he opted to just… Not to sleep again. “And then that one’s gonna go innnnn… there,” Peter mumbles, putting a wire in its place. He then turns the device he’s fixing and presses the buttons to activate it. “Beep boop.” “Who’re you talking to, kid?” Peter blinks. Did someone say something? Probably not. He twists the device again and reopens it to check why it didn’t actually turn on. He notices the wire he just placed is actually misplaced. Didn’t he put that… In the other-eh, thingy? “Wrooong,” he whispers into the opened belly of the… What is he fixing again? Looks like a remote. Probably a remote. “Wrong,” he repeats. Peter frowns at his hands. Since when does he have… Four? Is that a Spider-thing too? Shouldn’t he have eight then? “Peter-“ Peter turns his head to where the distant voice is coming from, only to realize Tony is right there next to him. Didn’t it just sound as if he was behind the door? Huh. “I know what sleep deprivation looks like, kid.” “I’m not tired,” Peter says, widening his eyes like a toddler being told it’s bed time. “Am just… a little sleepy maybe.” “Then go to bed.” “Nnnno.” Peter prolongs the n just a tad too long for to not be awkward. “Bad dreams.” “I know, sweetie, I know, but you can’t do this to yourself.” “Do what?” Peter stumbles upright to walk to the small kitchen area in the lab. Tony barely catches him when he trips, but the young man quickly pulls away from his boyfriend. Peter opens the fridge to find a can of Coke- he needs the sugar. He also spots some leftover mac and cheese. He figures he’s also going to need the carbs to stay awake, so he grabs the container (opting to ignore that it took him three tries to hold onto it properly) and moves to the microwave. “No-no-no-no-“ Tony rushes towards him before he can close the microwave door and put on the timer. “We’re not warming up a metal can in a microwave, baby.” Tony’s fingers curl around Peter’s to stop him from pressing the button. Peter frowns and turns his head to the kitchen appliance and then to his hand. He’s still holding the container. Oh, he put his drink in the microwave. “I- I’m sorry,” he mumbles, turning back to the fridge only to notice he left the door open. He wants to stick his leg out to give it a gentle nudge to close it, but he immediately loses his balance. “Woah, there, I gotcha, I gotcha-“ Tony’s warm body catches Peter’s and it takes a second before the boy looks up. His eyes widen at the sight. “Tooony,” he slurs. “There’s two of you.” “That’s it.” Tony picks Peter up and carries him bridal style. “I’m taking you to bed.” Peter would struggle if he had any strength left in his body, but he doesn’t. He just wants to sleep, but he can’t. Not with the images he sees behind closed lids. Peter lets himself be taken care of. The two Tonies sit him down on the toilet, brush his teeth, help him into his pajamas and tuck him in. “Y’know-“ Peter mumbles. “I’m not sure what’s better.” “Hm?” Tony One and Tony Two (as Peter decides to call them) lay down next to Peter and raise their eyebrows. “I always think, nothing tops having sex with Tony.” Peter chuckles quietly. “Haaa, I said tops.” “Yes, Peter, you also said sex.” The Tonies’ eyebrows raise curiously. “Mm, I did.” Peter smiles. “I think I know what might top having sex with Tony.” “Oh? And what’s that?” Tony one and Tony two lean in slightly, lips hovering over Peter’s. “Having sex with Two Tonies.” Before Peter can continue his fantasy, both men are already sitting on top of him. He wonders why he can only feel one pair of legs, but he doesn’t really care. He’s already getting hard at the sight of his lover grinning down at him. “How about we strike a deal?” “Mmm?” Peter swallows loudly, already pushing his hips up and struggling to keep his eyes open. “We-“ The Tonies gesture around vaguely, looking unsure of where the other actually is. Maybe… It’s cause there’s only one Tony? Is there? No, Peter’s sure he sees two. Maybe Tony just can’t see them? “-are gonna make you feel really good.” Tony One and Tony Two lean in again, caressing Peter’s pajama shirt and slipping under it to tweak Peter’s nipples. The boy grunts, obviously exhausted already. “We’re gonna make you come. Do you want that?” Peter nods, head pressing into the pillow. “Yes, please,” he replies politely. He’s already losing track of his surroundings. “But we will only do that if you promise you go sleep after that, okay?” “Hmm…” “Okay?” Both Tony One and Tony Two repeat. Peter smiles up at his boyfriend times two and nods, closing his eyes and readying himself for the blissful pleasure. Maybe, with both Tonies with him, he won’t get bad dreams. “Oki.”

9 notes · View notes

anthropocore · 4 years

Text

making an apple pie

ingredients

1 sheet of shortcrust pastry

NOTE: you can make your own if you want, there are lots of great recipes online or in cookery books. you will need around 400g of shortcrust pastry, rolled to about 0.5cm thick.

NOTE II: this recipe can be made vegan if you use a vegan brand of pastry e.g. Jus-Rol! don’t forget to check the label

3-4 apples, peeled, cored and sliced thinly

I used apples picked from the orchard last year - from the freezer, defrosted.

spices - whatever you want! I used cinnamon, clove, nutmeg, and ginger

1 tsp vanilla essence, or more if you love vanilla!

juice of 1 lemon

mix this into the sliced apples - it will reduce the browning effect of oxidisation

1 or 2 tbsp sugar - depending on how sweet you would like the pie to be. brown sugar works best!

1 egg, beaten - to glaze the pastry

NOTE: you can also use milk to do this, or plant milk to veganize the recipe.

equipment

an oven and oven gloves! this will be a hot pie!

a 9-12 inch pastry dish, around 1-2 inches deep. it’s up to you really, whatever depth or width of pie you like! but these are approximately the right measurements for the ingredients listed

baking paper

baking beans

NOTE: these are usually small ceramic beads that are used to weigh down pastry as it cooks, to stop air bubbles forming in the pastry. you can also use dried kidney beans, lentils, rice - anything you have to hand! I used dried kidney beans, which are stored in an airtight container in the cupboard in between uses.

a pastry brush - if you don’t have one you can use a piece of kitchen paper or even your fingers! it’s for spreading the egg/milk onto the pastry

instructions

remove your pastry from the fridge around 30 minutes before you need to use it! if the pastry is too cold, it will be difficult to unroll and may break. don’t worry if it breaks, you can warm it with your fingers and use water or milk to stick it back together. you can always roll it out again too!

pre-heat the oven to 180 degrees celsius

cut a piece of baking paper large enough to line the base and sides of your pastry dish. this goes between the dish and the pastry to stop the pastry sticking.

unroll your pastry, and cut to the approximate shape of your pastry dish. this is ideally around two-thirds of your pastry. it needs to completely cover the inside of the dish. if your dish is round, you can cut the overlapping corners of the pastry and push the spare bits into the gaps to ensure the dish is lined to the rim.

place your pastry dish into the freezer for 10 minutes, or the fridge for 20. cooling your pastry before you cook it helps to reduce the amount of shrinkage that occurs when the pastry cooks.

at this point you can cut your leftover one-third of pastry into strips, and refrigerate on a plate. these pieces will make the lattice on top of the pie!

once the pie is suitably cooled, place another piece of baking paper on top of the pastry and add your baking beans or alternative.

place pie dish into the pre-heated oven for 15 minutes.

meanwhile, toss together the sliced apples in lemon juice with your spices, vanilla, and sugar, so that the slices are coated. leave this mixture to rest. (I recommend tasting the apple at this point - it’s delicious!)

after 15 minutes, remove the pie dish from the oven and carefully take out the baking beans. this is most easily done by carefully lifting them using the baking paper underneath.

brush the pastry with egg wash/milk, and return to the oven for 5 minutes.

after 5 minutes, remove the pie dish from the oven. gently place your apple slices into pastry dish - it should be filled to the brim!

use the cooled spare pastry strips to create a lattice on top of the pie. you can break the strips and re-join them using your hands, to make the right length!

cover the lattice with egg wash

place pie in the oven for 30-40 minutes. I recommend checking your pie at around 20 minutes, to see how it’s doing. if you are concerned that the pastry is cooking quicker than the apples, you can cover the pie with cooking foil and reduce the oven temperature by 10-20 degrees. your pie is done when the apple filling is soft and bubbling, and the pastry is golden brown. use your eyes and your nose and check the pie often while it is cooking!

your pie is done! serve with whatever you like - cream, ice cream, yogurt, fresh or frozen berries, toffee sauce, or custard!

share it with the people you love or keep it all to yourself - you worked hard to make it! it should keep quite well in the fridge for 5-7 days, and can be eaten cold or re-heated to piping hot in the oven or microwave.

you can also follow this basic recipe and replace the apple filling with just about any fruit, berries are really good!

#baking #apple pie #cottagecore #cottagecore cooking #naturecore #fruit #dessert #recipe #cottagecore recipe #cottagecore aesthetic #cottage life #my posts

37 notes · View notes

c-is-for-circinate · 5 years

Text

C’s infinitely modifiable recipe for vaguely niceish dinner-including-vegetables 20 minutes after walking in the front door

Like many of us, my executive function is dead by the end of the day, especially if I’m tired, especially if I’m hungry, and figuring out How To Food when I need it most is hard as fuck, especially if my kitchen’s kind of messy and I stall out on needing supplies or space.

Also like many of us, I have a really hard time figuring out How To Vegetable, because I’m very afraid of buying fresh things that might go bad before I have the spoons to use them. And IDK about you, but I get really tired of eating the same thing all the time, so the only way to actually make myself get excited about cooking and eating is to have the option for variety.

Luckily for me, I’ve nailed ‘many, many pasta dishes I would not be ashamed to serve my mother’ down to a familiar, easy formula that I can follow with whatever I have on hand in the freezer and cabinets. Even better, knowing this formula helps me go grocery shopping, because I can buy specific canned, frozen, jarred, and refrigerate-able things knowing several different ways I can use them.

Maybe it will help you too! Maybe not! But it has made my life SO MUCH BETTER, so, as a gift from me to you, A Recipe (of sorts).

To start: Drop your shit by the door. Get out one frying pan, one pasta pot, and a wooden spoon or plastic spatula or whatever you have to cook with. It does not matter that the counter is a mess; all you need are two clear stove burners. There are almost no prep steps to fuck with your executive function and block you from starting this process as soon as you get home.

Step 1: Veggies Get some olive oil heating up in your pan on medium/low. While it’s warming up, go to your freezer and grab any frozen veggie you own: broccoli, peas, sliced bell peppers, zucchini, spinach, mixed medley, whatever. When the oil’s hot enough that a couple of drops of water sprinkled into it sizzle a bit but don’t spit, pour the veggies straight into the pan. (About 1/4 to 1/2 of a bag is usually plenty for me to make dinner + tomorrow’s lunch). If the oil is Way Too Hot, turn the burner down, wait briefly, and toss the veggies in anyway. They’re frozen, they’ll survive.

Step 2: Carbs If you’re doing regular pasta (or those great frozen raviolis they sell at the grocery store, for extra flavor/protein), stick a pot of heavily salted water on the hottest burner cranked up to high, slap a lid on it, and wait for it to boil. If you’re doing couscous or some other fun grain that cooks in 10 minutes or less, get that going however you usually make it. If you’ve got a bunch of leftover rice in the fridge from the other day’s takeout, wait until the veggies are mostly thawed and then toss it right into the frying pan. Break it up with the wooden spoon and add a little extra oil to make sure none of it’s too dry. (Sadly, this recipe is not scaled for potatoes.)

(Optional: Seasoning #1 If you happen to have minced garlic in your fridge, throw that shit in the frying pan when the veggies are mostly thawed. If all you’ve got is dried, that’s cool, wait for later. Make sure you add the liquid soon after, b/c garlic burns fast. This is also a good time to add ginger, if you have it on hand and the ingredients you’re planning to use work with it.)

Step 3: Liquid Grab a can of [black beans/tomatoes/coconut milk/crushed pineapple/literally whatever, use the condensed soup if you want, this recipe is ANYTHING GOES] from the cabinet, drain about half the liquid out of the can and throw the rest straight into the pan. OR snag a jar of [pre-made pesto/harissa/salsa/whatevs] from the fridge, and spoon in a big glop. (Use judgment here. Save half a can of things like coconut milk instead of draining it down the sink. If it all looks super dry you can add some a splash of broth, or juice, or milk, or wine, or whatever, but you shouldn’t need much--you’ll have pasta water for that in a minute, and your frozen veg probably produced a ton of liquid to begin with.)

Step 4: Cooking Get that pasta in the water as soon as it’s boiling. If you’re doing grains, check on them and do whatever you’re supposed to do to make the grains cook right. Turn up the heat on the stuff in the pan so it bubbles a little around the edges. The wetter all the stuff in your pan is, the hotter you want the burner. You’ve got a fair bit of leeway here; so long as you’ve still got liquid in there, and you vaguely keep an eye to make sure it doesn’t burn, this can keep going without damaging anything until your carbs are done. (Sugary liquids like orange juice or the syrup from canned fruit are more likely to burn, so keep a closer eye on those and cook them a little cooler.) This is a good point to wash out a bowl to eat out of if you don’t have a clean one. Shove just enough dirty dishes aside to make sure you’ve got enough space in the sink to drain the pasta.

(Optional: Meat/meat substitute We’re cooking fast tonight, so we’re going for precooked meat options. I’ve used canned tuna, frozen Ikea meatballs, leftover grocery store rotisserie chicken, frozen shrimp, fancypants gourmet chicken sausages (which freeze very well), jarred pulled pork I made in my crock pot three weekends earlier... Like everything else in this recipe, you can go as low-budget or as pretentiously gourmet as you like. Microwave frozen things on 50% for a minute or two in the bowl you’re planning to eat your dinner in, then throw them right into the frying pan.)

Step 5: Season (for real this time) Taste the stuff in your frying pan and decide what it needs. You can throw in dried spices or fresh or dried herbs, or splash in soy sauce or vinegar or sriracha, or anything else you use to season food. Season heavily, because your carbs are going to stretch all the flavors out, except for salt--you can add that once everything’s in the same pan.

Step 6: Combine When your starch is mostly-almost-done, drain most but not all of the liquid, and dump the pasta or quinoa or rice or whatever-you’ve-got right into the skillet. (Leaving in a little bit of pasta liquid will help thicken everything and stick it together.) Mix it all up with your trusty wooden spoon or plastic spatula or whatever you’re using and let it all hang out for a minute while you get your bowl. Here’s where you taste and add more salt if it really needs.

(Optional: Cheese If it’s been that kind of day and the stuff in your pan + the contents of your fridge offer up a tasty combination, turn the heat off and just dump a shitton of shredded cheese right into the pan. Mix everything fast so it all melts together from the heat of the pasta and it all gets melty and a little stringy and delicious.)

And that’s it! One Frozen Veggie + One Carby Base + One Wet Canned/Jarred Thing + a few minutes of cooking + some spices + optional meats and/or cheeses = dinner, fifteen to twenty minutes after walking in the front door, plus probably lunch for tomorrow along with it.

This is also very often my base recipe even when I’m working with fresh veggies or raw meat. Chopping fresh veggies adds an extra 5-10 minutes at the front end, depending on how many different kinds of vegetables I’m using. (Make sure any raw veggies go into the pan before any frozens, because they’ll take longer to cook.) If I’m working with raw meat or fish, or I’ve marinated tofu and I want it to get brown and tasty, I’ll generally season my protein and sautee it in the pan before I do anything else, then set it to the side in the bowl I plan to eat dinner in and cook everything else just the same as normal.

Obviously this takes a little bit of flavor-matching when it gets to the seasoning stage, but the whole ‘match a frozen thing to a canned/wet thing’ part is surprisingly forgiving, particularly if you stick to individual veggies instead of trying to play with one of those mixed vegetable medleys.

I generally season a few different ways based on my ‘wet’ ingredient:

Canned tomatoes --> tons of garlic, any vaguely Italian herbs like basil/oregano/fennel, mozzarella or Parmesan cheese

Black or red beans --> lots of chili powder, some garlic, sometimes other spices with a bite like paprika or ginger to round out the flavor for fun, usually cheddar or “southwestern cheese blend”

Canned fruit, orange juice or canned baby corn --> heavy ginger, some garlic, soy sauce, sometimes Chinese Five Spice if I have it around, no cheese

Coconut milk --> just ginger and garlic, OR something vaguely garam masala-like (cinnamon, cumin, cardamom, coriander, cloves, chili, plus also non-c spices like nutmeg and whatever else seems like it might be an okay idea), no cheese

Just broth --> any of the above, OR mustard and paprika, usually with cheddar (particularly if I can add frozen or fresh diced apples to a frozen veg like broccoli)

Pesto, harissa, salsa, and other jarred ingredients usually have tons of seasoning in them already, so I season lightly to enhance whatever they’ve already got going on

(Worth noting that I grew up on Italian cooking, so I think garlic belongs in everything and I’m very much not an expert on many flavor profiles--these are things that taste good to me, and a place that might work for you to start from if you don’t have a lot of ideas what you might like.)

Good luck! Happy cooking!

#food #recipes #I have no idea if this formula will be helpful to ANYBODY ANYWHERE #but it's helped me figure out how to eat vegetables and also meals that aren't completely out of a boxx #less sodium than kraft mac and cheese at least #so what the hell #maybe somebody else's life will be made slightly easier #by a general outline that can be adapted with lots of variations #and doesn't require an oven

331 notes · View notes