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ferociouslycreativemystery · 1 year

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So I watched La Locker Room Aux Folles. Twice. Have an essay (cause how else is anyone supposed to process their feelings? talking to people? sounds fake but ok)

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THE FUCKING BUILD-UP TO THE MOMENT. THE EXECUTION OF IT. JUST THE EVERYTHING!!

So we have the first half of the episode, where tensions build through Isaac's ambiguous and continuing dismissal of Colin. Not knowing what it means allows for fear, and time amplifies that fear by letting each dubious action resonate, louder and louder. Now, we all know what this show is, and we think we know who Isaac is, so the fear may be reluctant to take root. Nevertheless it nags and nags, until you remember the little hints that this could go the wrong way: Isaac's homophobic comment in episode 3, Nate's betrayal of the team after feeling cheated, and doubt comes creeping in. You begin to wonder: could they really go there?

And then the loudest action hits: Isaac's offence at the use of a slur. From the moment he steps into the stands we know that his actions will force a crystallisation of his intent. Schrödinger's box is about to be opened; the midpoint is upon us.

Time for the locker room.

First: a long silence. Brilliant. I was on the edge of my seat. It gives us even more time and space to process, and infer, to feel every emotion fuelling the room: confusion, disappointment, worry, concern - fear. Who's gonna say something, and what will it be?

The unevenly balanced scales are threatening to topple, because out of everyone there, only three people truly know what's up. Given Isaac's behaviour up till now, we are only able to fully trust two of them to appreciate the real stakes at hand. Everyone is circling the bait, desperate to pull it down and find out what's on the other side, but only two people understand that the ramifications of the bite would run so much deeper.

We circle closer. Sam reveals the word that was used, and we're locked in on the subject. Not incidentally, not humorously as before, but seriously, directly, and with investment. This won't just be brushed off, or joked away. What happens now will be remembered, and what happens now holds weight.

The camera is on Colin. Everyone else is talking, but the camera is on Colin, because for all the time he's spent keeping his head down, the tide has finally gone out, and it has caught him between the seabed and the shallow surface. Any careless move, and he could break its surface tension.

Here, we reach turning point 1.

Isaac reveals the true source of his frustration, and the great tension hanging over the first half of the episode is resolved: he feels protective, and fears his previous inaction might have inadvertently caused hurt. Relief. One crisis is averted; he's not homophobic.

But this revelation soon begs another: what change has brought on this seemingly disproportionate reaction all of a sudden? Well, Isaac is too upset to give that answer. He leaves the befuddled team with two clues though: his best friend, Colin, and a hypothetical: "what if one of us is gay?"

The bait the team has been circling is now within touching distance. They go for Colin, "Do you know what that was about?", and he, paralysed by the proximity of the surface, dares only shake his head. Stay down. So the team follow their one lead and finally bite down.

Only, they choose the wrong hook.

They don't have all the pieces, so once they've laid the puzzle and find that one is missing, they fill the hole with the most immediately available, and also the wrong, person. Nevertheless their confusion is cleared, and the imminent danger is averted. Colin has the room to breathe easy again as the tide rolls back in, the surface floating further and further up, farther and farther away. But every tension is not resolved; the team's understanding is still not aligned with reality.

And Colin has seen through to the other side now, closer than he ever has before. Breaking through suddenly seems like a real possibility. Not just a distant fantasy, but something that could actually be done. Was almost done. What's more, the pieces have already been aligned, and all the team is talking about now is supporting the person in question. All he would have to do is step up and fill that precariously bridged gap, before the surface disappears from view again.

And he does. Of course he does, because this is his team.

Turning point 2 comes to pass, yet we don't get to see it happen. Because the words aren't important, it's about what comes after. And, (de)fences down for the first time, the only thing that invades that raw, newly exposed area of honesty is acceptance. It is so mundane, and so so significant, because what it means is support. The heavy weight Colin has carried along all alone for so long lands softly as a feather, because the hands that have hereunto been weighing it down further, unknowingly, can instead turn into helping ones.

And that is not the where this ends. Because again, the point was not the words, but neither is it the way they were received. We linger in this moment of acceptance, because the support is what matters. Now, my personal instinct in any such moment of anticipated sincerity is to cower away, because "having feelings about something obvious is cringe - how dare you care about something that isn't new and shiny and untainted by familiarity". So seeing Colin just stand there, letting the moment wash over him and allowing the others to fully see and continue seeing him, felt very impactful to me.

Another thing I love about the aftermath is that no obligations are pushed on Colin. He doesn't have to explain himself, he isn't scrutinised or made to apologise for having stayed closeted. He isn't mentioned to the media in regards to the incident.

Instead, the team and coaches close ranks around him. They take responsibility for managing their own actions and reactions, they handle Isaac and the press conference. Colin is allowed to set the pace, and the destination, and it is treated as a given that the team's role is to simply follow along and work together until they get there. He never has to defend himself, only explain his reasoning to his closest friend so that they can continue to understand each other. Because while yes, this is about Colin, Colin is also about the team. What matters is that they support each other.

The only thing I didn't quite connect with, and in fact made me feel slightly alienated (entirely personal - this is not a criticism of the episode, just a private reflection), was the "I was 99% sure you'd be fine with it, but the 1% scared the shit out of me" line. The possibility of rejection is obviously a pitch black shadow hanging over a huge number of queer people when coming out, and I am very fortunate to have never been in that position myself. But there are also more ways than flat out rejection that coming out can change a relationship - homophobia comes in many shapes and sizes.

I personally prefer stories that adress the less direct version, where there isn't an expectation of open hostility to coming out per se, but where ignorance and a lack of understanding might mean that any soft, honest, and vulnerable truths uncovered will end up squashed.

A great example of this is George's coming out arc in Feel Good (on Netflix), where the central issue isn't overt homophobia, but rather a pervasive careless and insincere attitude among her friends and family regarding anything emotional. It does result in homophobia, but not necessarily of the archetypal bombastic variety. I really enjoy exploring those nuances, of how prejudice feeds and feeds off of emotional cues and attitudes.

But I realise that this is not a story about an analogous situation to that, and that there is only so much nuance you can fit in a short scene at the end of an episode focusing on queer acceptance rather than the preceding fear of exclusion. And I can see that that line is an effective summary that's easily digestible to a wide audience, even if it does paint over some nuances. A single story cannot delve into every beat exactly according to your own wish list, unless you write it yourself - which is why I read, write and love fanfic. :)

(Oh and btw, Nate's arc was also great, mirroring Colin's in how he is finally letting the facade drop, acting on what he really values and cares about rather than trying to fit in and belong on other people's terms.)

Overall: an amazing episode with some really great moments - many of them all time favourites for me. Wonderful handling of the subject matter and masterful balancing of the tension with the resolution. They knew what they were doing, that's for sure. This is officially one of my favourite episodes in any series ever.

I'm so glad I found this show.

#I wrote this for me. but I'm sharing in case anyone else would like to read as well :)#this began as tags on a gifset #but I quickly realised these thoughts couldn't be contained in a mere 30 tags #yes it's basically just me recounting The Scene beat for beat #but I needed it out of my system okay #it's 1.5k words ish #maddie's writing tag #ted lasso #colin hughes

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regulus-books · 7 months

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warnings: so fluffy it made me want to throw up

wc: 967

I walk in to my apartment, my dark hair wet from the pounding rain outside. I put my bag down on the ground and walk to my bedroom, where I find my boyfriend, James, playing video games at his setup that he insisted we have. He's got his headphones on, ones with cat ears that I told him were childish, but he wanted them because they light up, one of his ears are uncovered so he hears me close the door.

"Hi, babe," I walk over to him and put my hand on the back of his head, leaning down to softly kiss him. The sound of his controller clacking is soothing to me.

"Hello, darling. How was school?" I sit on a bean bag chair.

"Very boring, very lonely."

"I keep telling you to make more friends, Pandora can't be around forever." I roll my eyes, Barty and Evan dropped out of our college within four weeks of being there.

"I know," I run a hand through my hair, pulling it away from my face. "What are you playing?" I look at his screen.

"Don't know. Some weird zombie killing game Sirius wanted to play," He clicks something on the screen and goes back to the controller.

"Hm," I shrug. "I'm gonna go take a shower." I stand up and kiss his head, then grab clothes. I take a long, hot shower, dry my hair and go back to my room.

"Feeling better?" James asks, turning to look at me.

"I guess," I sit on the floor next to him.

"Don't sit on the floor, darling, you're all clean. Come up here." James grabs my hand and pulls me up to sit on his lap, so I'm facing away from the screen.

"Who are you talking to?" I hear my brother's voice through James' headphones.

"Regulus," James answers, both his arms around me, he continues to play his game.

"Tell him I say hi."

"I can hear you, Sirius." I say, loud enough for James' microphone to pick up.

"We should chill soon," Sirius says, I can hear Remus in the background, complaining about one of his essays, also in college.

"Sure," James answers for me as I cuddle farther into his neck skin. "You're warm." He says, laying his head on top of mine.

"Makes sense, I'm not cold blooded, dear."

"What did I do to deserve such a smart boyfriend?" He laughs.

"Common sense and intelligence are different."

"Someone's tired, hm? You usually feed into my flirting."

"Aye! That's my baby brother your talking to, Potter!"

"He's in college, Sirius! Not a baby!"

"I don't care! If you had a brother, I wouldn't-!" I reach over to James' mouse and hang up on my brother.

"That was mean," James takes a hand off his controller and rubs it down my spine.

"He's annoying." I can feel James' smile.

"And you're mean."

"Don't care."

"Text Sirius for me and tell him you hung up on him, he won't be mad at you," I reach over to James' phone.

"Put in your password," I hand it to him, he pushes it away.

"The code is our anniversary," He says, I just stare at his face. When he realizes I'm staring, he looks at me and laughs a little. "You okay, m'love?" I look back down at the phone, a picture of me from when we got our flat is his background, I smile a little.

"Um, yeah," I punch in the numbers 10.3.80. It actually unlocks. "Oh."

"What? Is something wrong?" James asks, moving a piece of my hair out of my face.

"Nothing. Everything's perfect, darling." I lay back on him, my hands wrapped around his neck so I can still see his phone.

I text my brother.

This is Reg. Sirius, I promise, you don't have to worry about James hurting me. He loves me. I love him. So much. PS I hung up on you, he didn't. Stop being annoying. kisses hugs.

I shut off his phone and put it next to his keyboard.

"You wanna go to bed?" James asks, I turn to look out the window, and then look at the time on James' desktop screen.

7:30pm.

"Do you want to?" I ask, looking at his face.

"If you want to."

"James, that's not a answer."

"Alright, let's go," James closes out of all his tabs and picks me up.

"I can walk, J." I say, but I don't pull away.

"Grab my phone, will you?" He ignores, I nod, and lean back to pick up his phone off the desk. "Thank you, lovely," James holds me, one hand on my back and one on my butt. He sets me down on our bed and I crawl to my side. The right side. I always have the right side, when me and James first moved in together he fought with me over it. I won, obviously.

"Did you learn anything today?" He asks, plugging his phone into its charger.

"No," I say, folding the blanket over my body.

"Oh, you did too. You know what they say?"

"No, what do they say?"

"You learn something new everyday." James smiles and lays next to me.

"I learned that you saved that picture of me from last year when we first got the flat after I told you to delete it." I raise a eyebrow.

"Well, you look so cute in it." James puts an arm around my stomach and lays half on me, his head on my chest.

"Well, you told me you deleted it." I put a hand in his hair.

"I lied."

"Thanks for telling me."

"You're welcome." I smile, happy and content.

#marauders #jegulus #regulus black #james potter #james x regulus #r.a.b #j.f.p #regulus books #fluff

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soclam · 8 months

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i've been taking a break from playing bg3 so i don't get burnt out between filling my time with solely that and schoolwork, but because of brainworms i'm still thinking about it so here's victri's first impressions of the origin companions! (in order of when she met them)

Lae'zel: She's literally the first person Victri SEES after getting abducted by the mind flayers. When she bumps into her later, she's so happy to see someone else who can help her fight her way out of this place. She also thinks Lae is cool as hells because she kicks major ass. In her mind, they have strong bonds formed by the nature of them being in the same predicament so she's lowkey offended when she finds out Lae'zel doesn't think of them as besties?? Ma'am we fought together, we could have died together, and we're just allies? The fuck?

Shadowheart: (This is very funny because I failed the roll to free her from the pod and I didn't know I could just.. switch to Lae and try again so I left her behind by accident sdlkfhskhld) So Victri does her best to free Shadow on the ship but can't figure it out, so she promises to come back for her - and she means it! But then shit goes down and our silly little bard is waking up on a beach wondering why she isn't like beyond dead. When she starts to wander down the road and finds Shadow on the beach, she's genuinely so elated - you didn't die!! And of course Shadow is like "oh it's the bitch who left me behind :) i mean, at least you tried i guess". Victri starts sweating bullets and is like "haha let's travel together my fellow half-elf!" and Shadow hits her with the "we are not kin" and Victri gets ready to eat sand and die right there. Vic really wants to make things up to Shadow because she feels so guilty about not being able to free her (even though things turned out okay in the end). Vic is also very nosy so she's like "let's get to know each other!" and is thrown when Shadow is just like "let's not!".

When Shadowheart and Lae'zel start fighting or bickering, Victri almost always thinks they're trying to sway her out of concern for her. Like "aww my bestie wants me to make the right choice :)". No girl, they just want you to side with them. They don't like you (yet).

Gale: A strange magic man just came out of the portal in that rock, of course she's intrigued by him!! She also thinks he's really cute (this will cause problems for us later!) and is so genuinely relieved to encounter a person who is just?? polite?? He didn't try to kill her, he's been nice and seems normal, this is a man we can trust. When he asks for a tasty snack of some magical items, she has many questions but is basically just like "okay :) I love my good friend Gale" and hands him a fancy sword she found on a corpse while her other companions are begging her to give him something shittier. She also might have accidentally led him on without realizing? (This was a result of me planning to romance Gale but then finding out that Astarion is actually charming and they didn't lie to me on Twitter. Gale I am so sorry I still love you I am just bad at planning-)

Astarion: Since Vic and Astarion become an Item later I could write a whole essay on them. Basically she clocks him as someone who is capable of handling himself in battle, but is still clueless enough to turn her back on him. She's wary of him for about ten seconds and then hits him with the ol' "Wanna join my crew party?" With Astarion's admission later in the romance that he doesn't like Tav at first, I imagine that he meets her and is taken aback with how... gullible and naïve she seems (putting it nicely). Victri is like "oh cool, this guy who is skilled with knives is teaming up with us :) a great asset for our cause" and Astarion is like "it's gonna be so easy to manipulate this moron". She's a bard and likes to flirt but it usually doesn't go farther than that for her. When Astarion comes onto her, she definitely takes it at face value and is super earnest about starting to have feelings for him as they come. By the time he admits his feelings for her, she's already fully in love with him. His whole "aha so this was basically me manipulating you but I caught feelings oops" catches her by surprise because she's SO BAD at romance but she strongly believes on judging people in the present so she's more happy he's being honest now than upset about him lying before.

Wyll: THE Blade of Frontiers?? Victri is a bard so yes, she's heard the stories. She's stricken with how down-to-earth and genuine he seems. He's a little subdued compared to her other companions, but he has a strong sense of justice which she really resonates with. She thinks he's just the coolest, I like to imagine that he's kind of her rock throughout the adventure in a platonic way. He's always ready to lend an ear or a hand, based on the situation, and she'd do the same for him in an instant. Most of his values line up with hers and she feels like he's such an asset to the team. Does not even flinch when he gets devil-ified because she lowkey thinks the horns look good on him. She tries not to say anything though because she wants to be respectful of his feelings! The only thing holding her back from trying to kill Mizora is the knowledge that Wyll would die as a result. She would do anything for him, honestly, he's like a brother to her.

Karlach: Love. I could literally just leave it there. When she first runs into Karlach with Wyll, she senses something's up before the tadpole fuckery starts. Just looks her up and down and is internally like "this... is not the person Wyll described at all". She's all too happy to go fuck up the fake paladins for her newest bestest friend! Vic and Karlach have a lot of similar feelings about their friends ("we love them") and their issues ("that's so fucked") so they get along well. From the jump, Victri is like "I'll do whatever I can to help you [with the engine]" and when Karlach mentions needing an infernal mechanic she gets a literal exclamation point above her head and runs in circles because "I KNOW ONE OF THOSE!!" (Unfortunately for Karlach and Victri, I had already finished the Grove questline and Dammon had left for Baldur's Gate! So we had to wait until Act II with all this infernal iron burning a hole in her backpack teehee).

#bg3 #bg3 spoilers #bg3 tav #victri things #i might do individual posts abt the companions later because these started to get too long for my liking #but this is pretty much act 1 vibes #she loves her friends!#the more i think about it the more she has luffy “join my crew!!” energy sklfdhfsdh im gonna cry

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daimonhalos · 3 years

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Appreciation post for the eggpire and more during the red banquet cause I'm not seeing enough love for how well they organized and delivered and because I'm so proud of cc!Bad for how far the Bloodvines arc has gone ♥ (this stuff is from Bad's vod btw)

Also something to cheer people up a bit in case the lore got u hard like it got me cause I'm still not okay bestie <3

The starting soon screen being an animation (with glitches to show another frame!!) plus the jazzy electro-swing soundtrack underneath. Just such a good intro, I felt like I was actually in the waiting line for an event, just awesome.

Ponk. Just Ponk, dapper man, handsome Ponk just standing there. Gorgeous, thank you, standing ovation, I love him.

Just everything Bad and Ant did with the building of the room, the stairs!! The coat room!!! The statues right in front of the table, everything looked SO pretty.

ANT MY BELOVED LOOKING HANDSOME AS ALWAYS I just loved all their outfits. The banquet's skins just SLAPPED HARD.

The little moment where Bad changed view of his character and we could see him, Ant and Ponk cwc

Bad singing >>>>>>>>>>

Everyone getting lost despite the oak signs

THE ARC ABOVE THE DANCEFLOOR, WHAT THE HELL YOO

Bad complimenting everyone on their outfits and giving out some gapples here and there

Bad also always repeating the same catchphrases

Sam just drinking copiously and the dumpy situation

People actually dancing + HBomb being the dj

Puffy walking around Bad to see his outfit and complimenting him, just felt like their old friendship cwc

FOOLISH GAVE BAD A FLOWER <3

Bad scolding George for not wearing an outfit (Sam's "his name is Gogy and he is beautiful")

"It's almost time for the feast. It's gonna be delicious." the foreshadowing

Everyone dancing together cwc

"minecraft dancing is speed squats" eret ilu

Bad and Ant complimenting moment ♥

The eggpire all on the same side of the table. Them

Ponk's little "Hello!" after Bad said he made the soup, plus everyone going "good job!!" just twt

When Bad started asking if anyone wanted to give a toast, I realized eventually that this was more of a disguised "Want to say your last words before death?" and it now sounds s o freaking cool. ye s

P O N K 'S S P E E C H

"you look beautiful right now" sam i will cry

When in the middle of his speech, Bad turns to Ant who's already looking at him, nods, Ant nods back, and as Bad turns around again we can see Ant walking away from his seat. I am OBSESSED with this scene, like you already know something is about to go down and oh gosh it was delivered so good

THE LAVA COMING DOWN FROM THE CEILING AS BAD KEPT TALKING, NONE NOTICING, HIM TALKING ABOUT HOW THE BANQUET WILL BE UNFORGETTABLE. SO HOT

"And yeah! Thank you for coming everybody" the little mischievous giggles right after "And prepare uh ... yep. Prepare to die." AND THEN HE FUCKIGN DRINKS FROM HIS GLASS LIKE COME ON YOU CANT BE ANY COOLER THAN THAT YOOO

"The leaf is staying the way it is" you can hear the laughter in his voice like HAH GOTTEM that's so good

Bad still giving Hbomb gapples cwc

"Where you looking for this perchance?" AND THEN EQUIPS THE ENTIRE ARMOR AND WEAPONS E Y E when the twists started dude. this si where the twists started and never ended

HANNAH CROSSING SIDES AND SIDING WITH THE EGGPIRE. QUEEN SHIT that was such a cool moment for her i'm so glad she's getting her moment

The eggpire laughing, just pure villainy, love them

"Time to get on the main event" the nonchalance. The way they equipped the crossbows and readied the arrows at the same time. B r u h fucking awesome they are

The eggpire faking being afraid when Sam was talking about blowing the egg up. Sad that we already knew about the obsidian thing, but still made it a very cool scene. Especially right after when they started laughing at them again. I don't know what it is about it but I love them being so sassy.

FREAKING EXECUTIONS THEY WORKED FOR MASS EXECUTIONS they were able to trap all those freaking people!! And trick them and counter attack all the time! what the fuck, I'm so impressed

Thank you Fundy for sounding super terrified /gen ♥

Wait ahah they really said EGGSECUTION-

THE EGG HATCHES THE EGG HATCHES THE EGG HATCHES im not saying IT but im saing Velvet

"Follow me! Follow me!" HANNAH SOUNDED SO ENTHUSIASTIC i love

"We trusted you!" "Well, that was your first mistake-" THE WAY BAD WAS ABOUT TO LAUGH. DUDE they definitely had so much fucking fun making this

sassyboyhalo

Foolish acting thank u ily. Also the thunder not working what the heck i wanna know what was going on inside his mind right then he sounded so lost. THE ACTING

"Sacrifice!" Hannah idk how to say this but I love you

ANT MOMENTTTT

When puffy called them selfish i was expecting bad to just do a huge double take. I wanted him to snap immediately PLEASE SNAP-

BAD DELIVERING AGAIN WITH THE AMAZING ACTING

"Not just for the egg but for what the egg is going to give us" he's so desperately trying to make them udnerstand it promised him his friend back he literally mentions it every single time but everyone calls him selfish because they think he wants power when he just wants skeppy's friendship back in this essay I will- Anyway yes I love that he never explicitly says it because it kills us viewers with pain cause we KNOW and then the reveal will be 100 times more powerful. This is so awesome

"I can't stop Quackity and you know why I can't stop. If I stop I can't get what I need." his voice grew so much lower like he's just holding back MAN I HH IT WAS SO GOOD

SECRET RETREAT ROOM YOOO

Ponk giving Bad some food and telling him to stay safe, Bad telling both Hannah and Ponk to stay safe too. My tears

And now the solo Bad lore part, where we actually see the true part of him that's absolutely devastated and makes me cry, the way he acted all confident and then saw everything crumble in a few seconds and now he's destroyed again because what if they find a way to destroy the egg what then? what if he never gets skeppy back? dude, you can just read his emotions it's so sad and i love how it was portrayed

"I know where I can go. I know who I can see!" BDI REF BDI REF FOR SURE I have a feeling that's going to be explained in the next lore stream with Skeppy and I'm so hype. I love the little crumbs of references here and there.

"But now they have it.." he sounded so broken??? bad your acting please ill cry

"I didn't really want to hurt anybody" his true self trying to get back cwc especially because he's farther away from the egg. I just love the transition between the guy Bad portrays who's so sure about the egg when it's in front of others and the doubts and anxiety he actually has when he's alone. Just so cool

"Did I screw up?" im just pointing out everything that moves me emotionally cause these people's acting is so cool

Ending the stream with simple black background my beloved

Okay but really I'm so so so proud of the ccs for making this happen and it's only going upwards, I'm literally so in awe, they really said go big or go home

Free space for Ant's villain speech I wasn't able to hear yet, but they said it was v cool, so I'm trusting people on this

Thank you for listening, stan Bloodvines arc /hj

If I made typos no I didn't

#badboyhalo #antfrost #ponk #hannahxxrose #captain puffy #awesamdude #fundy #foolish gamers #hbomb94 #georgenotfound #velvetiscake #skeppy #quackity #dream smp #dream smp spoilers #purp pls stop #long post #red banquet

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starbuckie · 3 years

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𝐬𝐭𝐮𝐝𝐲 𝐛𝐥𝐮𝐞𝐬

pairing: highschool!bucky barnes x reader

words: 1.0k words

warnings: senioritis, fluff, and bucky being a clingy little shit

summary: senioritis is a bitch, and that virus certainly extends to two teens in brooklyn.

a/n: i’m tired of high school and shit and finals are kicking my ass so i wrote this lil thing. (also look at this lil skinny noodle theater boy, i woulda dated the heck out of him) anyways, please enjoy <3

main masterlist || sebastian stan characters masterlist

Y/N’s eyes focused in and out on the pot of pasta her mother was cooking on the stove. There were many other things she should have been doing, pressing matters like the fifteen unfinished assignments she had to turn in by the next Monday, but the combination of a near-summer school day and the stress of not actually doing the assignments was getting to her.

“Honey, I’m home!”

Great.

The bane of her existence came in the form James Buchanan Barnes, God-like dick game and loved by all mothers. His fluffy chestnut hair was swept under a baseball cap, and he carried two bags of groceries, for her mother, into the kitchen where she sat.

It wasn’t as if she were bothered by her boyfriend, but with him around there was no way in hell she would get anything finished. Turning back to the half-assed, half-written page she had been working on for hours, she tried to ignore the presence of Bucky hugging her mother hello.

Once again, an absolute kiss ass.

“Hey, pumpkin,” Bucky dropped a kiss to her forehead as he started to put the groceries away. Fucking suck up. “How come you didn’t answer my text? I asked if I could come over.”

“I did answer your text, asshole.” Y/N turned over her phone to check the texts for evidential proof. “Yeah, see, I texted you no.”

Bucky shoved the phone away from where she held it out to him, placing an orange on the table. “And I chose to ignore that text because I wanted to see you.” He sang with a smile.

That little smirk he wore was enough for Y/N’s tough resolve to break and she stood to pounce up on him from behind with a hug. She nosed his neck gently and smelled his cologne, amber and oud filling her senses and making her mind all boggled with thoughts of him.

“Hey, if you two are gonna be gross, then go upstairs,” Ms. L/N smacked her shoulder with the dirty dish rag and she squealed away from the hit. “But if you two are gonna bang, then go to his because I’m not washing those damn sheets for you do that.”

Both of the teens blushed at her ribbing, and immediately grabbed their stuff to scramble upstairs. As they trudged up the stairs with their backpacks, Bucky noticed the way Y/N’s eyes would flutter shut for a moment and the way her steps faltered. It was no secret that her five AP exams were kicking her ass, and the studying was no better.

The way he saw it, there was no point in struggling onto the slippery grasps of sleep in replacement of studying. Highschool was three weeks from being done, and soon enough they’d be out of Brooklyn and on their way to California to hit the sun and study their asses off in college.

As soon as they entered her ivy-painted room Y/N slammed the stupid essay on her desk and slumped into her swivel chair. Bucky knew the drill well enough by that point, dropping his backpack by the foot of her bed and flopping onto the pristine white sheets with an obnoxiously loud groan. “God, this bed feels so good, pumpkin, I don’t know how you can stay out of it for so long.”

“Well, when you’re falling behind in school it’s a lot easier than you’d think.” Y/N quipped back distractedly. The words on the paper seemed to swirl and move right under her stare, and there was no way she could focus. She knew that eight more pages of blank papers sat right under the first, all waiting to be filled out with sentences about the effects of cardiorespiratory coherence on the spectrum of human emotions.

Bucky groaned, hauling his legs onto the sheets and turning towards his girlfriend with a pout. “C’mon, babydoll, if you come over here, you can have sex with me. How’s that sound? You wanna have sex with me? I’ll do that thing you like, even make you shed a few tears...”

Though his offer sounded more than appealing, Y/N had to turn it down and shift herself in the chair to ease the throbbing of her core. “As much as I would like to cry on your dick, and trust me, I would very much like to cry on your dick, I unfortunately need to cry on my essay instead. I was getting work done all until you walked in with that cute lil’ smile of yours.”

Bucky blushed at the comment which made her grin. It was amusing how flushed he got after making such raunchy things to her. “Well, what do you want, babydoll. I can bring you a bowl of mac and cheese from your ma, or,” he scooped her up in his arms, reveling in her squeals of laughter, “I can snuggle ya to death. How’s that sound?”

Her voice was muffled against the fabric of his henley, but he could kinda not really understand the words she gurgled out. “I’m gonna take that as a yes.”

Y/N laughed in his hold, turning over to smush her face into his chest. “I’m just tired of this bullshit. All the assignments and late nights, and don’t get me wrong, I love my mother, but if I get one more comment about my study time management, I’m going to scream.” She sighed, clutching just a bit harder around his back. “I want it all to be over, I guess. Just you and me in California already, sitting in the sun and drinking green juices, or whatever shit they do over there.”

Bucky didn’t even have to say anything, Y/N knew he shared the same sentiment. College was fast approaching and scary, and the stress of the impending graduation did nothing but make it seem that much farther away.

“God, you’re so warm, I wanna lay with you here forever. Studying can go fuck itself.”

“Then stay with me, pumpkin,” he chuckled, pulling her closer. “I ain’t going anywhere yet.”

Legend has it that there was no studying done for the rest of the night, and Y/N’s mom would find them passed out in each other’s arms before six o’clock.

#bucky x reader #bucky barnes x reader #bucky barnes #bucky barnes x you #highschool!bucky #bucky x yn #bucky barnes x yn #sebastianstan #marvel

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lifeofclonewars · 3 years

Text

Fives and Echo in Clone Cadets

Okay, buckle in if you're gonna read this. I'm an English major and you can tell bc this started out as a quick rant with a few points in my head at midnight and turned into a full analytical essay on the Domino Twins throughout the entirety of Clone Cadets in one sitting plus some next-day editing. What can I say, I analyze everything I watch even when I'm not consciously doing so. Some pictures and links included.

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I get the whole “Fives and Echo weren't close until after Rishi” thing because of the poetic-ness of the narrative of brothers who aren't close going through trauma and coming out of it stronger and as best friends all that but listen to what I have to say.

We’ll start chronologically: with their final run-through before the finals. As you may know, I made a list (here) of who argues with whom during Clone Cadets. The other three constantly nag Echo about his habit of repeating things. Hevy and Cutup both call Echo, well, Echo but before he accepts it as a name and more as an insult. Cutup’s the first one to do it, literally almost right off the bat. Hevy does it to purposefully pick a fight after the practice test. DB responds to Echo's “stop calling me that” with “stop repeating every order.”

Fives argues a bit with the rest of Domino when they're all arguing, but he only says one negative thing toward Echo. But there are so many things that make it different from the things aimed at Echo from the rest of the squad.

He tells him “Will you shut up with instructions? You're not in charge.” Domino’s nagging Echo about the repeating, Fives... doesn't quite do that. The narrative makes it look like Fives is also mad about the repeating orders, given both DB and Cutup have at this point. However, what Fives says doesn't make a direct reference to Echo’s habit, at least. He's definitely frustrated here (they all are, they’re failing again), but, at least to me, he's frustrated because Echo's focused more on getting them to follow exact orders instead of moving forward or working together. And yeah, he snaps a bit while reminding Echo he's not squad leader and not focusing on the right thing. But he never mentions the echoing, and, after this one moment, he never makes a negative comment toward Echo again during Clone Cadets. Also, important to note, Echo wasn’t repeating orders or anything when Fives snapped at him, just saying they’re not following orders again (which is different).

So, basically: everyone’s arguing about everything. Everyone argues with Echo about various things. Fives is the only one that doesn’t go and make a comment about Echo’s repeating during it, though.

That signifies something. Fives has got a better understanding or acceptance or trust in Echo than the rest of Domino. He doesn't mock him for what makes him him. He gets why Echo does it, maybe. Even if he doesn't, he knows it helps Echo and that Echo repeating orders is his way of trying to help his brothers. And this comes into play at a point farther along in the episode that we’ll get to soon.

Next comes the, like, one moment we see the clones have some downtime. It’s when, once again, they start arguing. Despite DB being the one to tell Echo “stop repeating every order” during the run-through, we see them getting along here. We see them chatting with each other and 99 very briefly when Fives' gives his “you never even met a girl” line and Hevy comes barging in. Hevy insults 99, Echo tells the squad to follow orders, an argument starts, yada yada.

Then, Hevy gives his “care to repeat that, Echo?” line, which I mentioned earlier as Hevy doing it to purposefully pick a fight. When they start to fight, we hear the other members of Domino start cheering Hevy on. One says “Come on. Get him, Hevy!” The other says, “Smack that know-it-all.”

Here’s the thing, though. They show a shot of DB, Cutup, and Fives. Cutup can be seen pumping his fist but his accent isn’t heard. There are two voices speaking, but they’re layered on top of each other so it’s hard to tell who’s speaking and how many people are speaking if you aren’t paying attention. Together, this comes out to look like Fives and DB could be the ones talking, and Cutup’s not actually speaking.

However, as I’ve mentioned in previous posts, Cutup’s accent drops in and out all throughout Clone Cadets. Especially during impromptu moments. With this, it is also possible to conclude that he is speaking during the fight, just without a different accent, especially since he’s pumping his fist.

That leaves Fives or Droidbait as the other person speaking. As you can see, both of them seem to be watching. Now, you could argue that Fives is the one who said something. You can argue the DB is the one who said something. Since they’re showing the fight when the lines overlap (the “Get him” one starting about a second earlier), there’s no conclusive evidence for either. For the point of this argument, you can’t argue that it proves Fives and Echo were close, you can’t argue that it proves they weren’t.

Following that comes Colt’s speech before the final. As I’ve noted multiple times, nobody in Domino is happy with Echo the first time he makes a comment.

Going back and watching it happen in time reveals a bit more, though. They’ve all got facial expressions kinda similar to it when it cuts back to them after Colt speaks. Echo says “thinks he means us, boys?” Hevy seems to be the only one truly angry about the comment. The other three seem to be more of “what are you talking about, you know we’re not that great.” Plus, you know, they’re all nervous about their final. Even more so with how they didn’t make it through the day before. (Here’s a link if you wanna see it for yourself. 0:45; it’s all quick reactions, but you can see what I mean)

(Hmm so maybe I was wrong about that screenshot before. Go figure. There’s a reason screenshots aren’t always completely reliable sources for shows, since none of what I just talked about is visible in a standstill moment. This is why I’ve rewatched Clone Cadets 48209832 times. I’m still picking up new things about Domino while doing it.)

When Echo says, “well bravo for Bravo Squad,” some other things happen. Firstly, Echo’s rolling his eyes. He’s either being flippant about Bravo or he’s being self-aware enough to know it’s a bad pun and that his brothers don’t like his comments. But Fives actually looks over, concerned, when he makes the comment.

That definitely counts for something. Especially since the other three don’t look very concerned about how Echo’s feeling with the comments. (Hevy’s definitely not looking over here.) But Fives seems to be wondering how anxious Echo’s feeling or something along those lines and how Echo’s expressing it. Especially since Echo doesn’t purposely pick fights like Hevy. He’s just making comments that happen to aggravate the Squad more than he’s usually trying to use as his way of showing he cares about his brothers and how well they perform.

After that comes their first run of the final. And with it comes a moment I love so much. Echo’s standing at one of the cover blocks when Fives runs up to him. Not only does this happen, but Echo smiles so much at seeing his brother do so.

He’s just! So happy that Fives is there. I love that. Anyway, Fives tells him, “you flank right, I’ll flank left.” Then comes Echo’s lil pun moment. Fives rolls his eyes, but he looks more fond but exasperated than truly annoyed.

Right after that, Fives runs off again. Which means he took Echo’s comment about staying on the same side and went with it, even though that wasn’t his initial plan. He’s trusting in Echo’s combat planning there. After DB gets shot down, we can actually see this happen as they meet Hevy at another one of the blocks. They come from the same side, Fives, then Echo. So, it worked out successfully.

When Colt tells them they failed not too long after that, another thing happens! Fives and Echo share a look. They didn’t have to — Hevy was behind Fives and Cutup was in front of Echo. They could’ve shared a look with them. But they didn’t. It’s definitely an “oh crap” kind of look they share with each other. Something that’s usually shared with those your closer to in situations like that, ya know?

“But wait!” you might say. “These are mostly examples of Fives being a good brother than of them being close.” Well, that’s where Echo and Fives talking to Shaak Ti about transferring squads comes into play! Of course, since I’m going chronologically, it’s not the immediate next point on this, but it happens during this conversation.

The two of them talking to her is a pretty big deal, especially since constantly up to that point we see Echo not getting along with the squad. He definitely wouldn't do it with Hevy, who he fights with most. Cutup and Echo don't fight as much as Echo and Hevy but we don't see them actually talk to each other besides whenever they do the sim, right before the second final, and Rishi. And Rishi is Hevy and Cutup making fun of Echo a bit. (Main difference then is that they do understand each other better to some degree and it doesn't escalate like it once might've.) DB, I touched on some points earlier.

But there’s a reason it’s Echo and Fives here, and it’s more than just Fives fighting with him less.

When they talk to Shaak Ti Fives trusts Echo to do the talking for them (he only speaks up twice with small comments then). While it’s a short conversation, most of the talking is done by Echo. The duo most likely had a conversation beforehand about what they were asking and why. While we don’t know who asked the other if they wanted to do it, they’re both there, and Fives trusted Echo and his memory and ability to repeat the points they wanted to make. It's the exact opposite of what the squad has been doing. Instead of mocking the repetition, he gives Echo a chance to do it without judgment and as a positive thing.

Echo also goes on to do some things that show it’s not just Fives being a good brother, it goes both ways with them.

There are only two instances where we see Echo touch someone. One is when he fights with Hevy (and Hevy starts it). The other instance is with Fives, during this talk. The two of them had been standing at parade rest and Echo — who's whole thing as a cadet is following orders — breaks it to set a comforting hand on Fives' shoulder!

He's the one to do it! Echo’s the one that takes the opportunity to comfort Fives and Fives doesn’t shy away from it. And not only did he recognize what Fives was feeling, but he also acted on it. They know each other well enough at this point to understand each other’s emotions and how to react to them accordingly.

And it's not like the other clones don't nudge and pat each other on the back and whatnot. Hevy pats 99 on the head (condescendingly smh Hevy you know better but whatever that's not the point).Both Fives and DB nudge Cutup for a comment he makes.

Echo just... doesn't do it during Clone Cadets. (I will point out he gives 99 a light excited punch on the shoulder during Arc Troopers — but that's after he's been with Torrent and trusts 99 even more than he did on Kamino for helping Hevy out) But he does voluntarily set a hand on Fives' shoulder. He’s comfortable enough with Fives to do it when we don’t see him do it with the rest of Domino or even 99.

Also, we all know Fives smacks some of his brothers, we've all seen that post by now. But he never does it with Echo. Instead, he lets Echo do what he's comfortable with. I just think that's important to note.

There’re also multiple times in this scene where they share looks while they’re speaking or when Shaak Ti says something. If you watch Arc Troopers or the first half of the Citadel Arc, even some parts of Rookies, Fives and Echo have a lot of nonverbal communication. This is just planting the seeds for that.

This scene can also be used for some “Fives and Echo aren’t that close” arguments, especially if you go with the “they are literal twins” hc. The whole “they wanted to stick together because they were twins, not necessarily because they got along better” argument. There are some other points here, like the fact that Fives did say something rude to Echo, or that Fives was talking to Cutup in their downtime and Echo with DB.

The thing is, with these things I've talked about, it shows that they were close on Kamino, regardless of that hc. I highly doubt LF and Filoni actually write them as twins (they probably would've mentioned it by now if they were). So while I personally like to take some of these things as them being twins, mostly they just show that either way, they were close. And the points Echo makes while asking Shaak Ti come into play as well.

Echo states, “Which is why Fives and I are looking out for each other,” when told that the clones, like the Jedi, have individuals and the group be one and the same. He makes it a clear point that they’re looking out for each other, that they’re trying to make the decision they think is best for the other. That’s! A big deal and sign that they’re close, if you ask me.

Right at the end of the scene, Fives once again shows his trust in Echo. After hearing that they’ve been given another shot at the final, he looks skeptical. What does he do right after? Look at Echo. He didn’t need to, he could’ve stared at the wall, ground, given Shaak’s back a funny look. But he looks to his brother for comfort again. And we see Echo look back at him, doing so, right as it transitions to Cutup’s scene.

(“Wow this is really long, you must be obsessed with Domino Squad,” you might also say. That would be correct lol. We’re almost done, though.)

The next time we see either of them is when they think Hevy hasn’t shown up but then does. This is a nice little moment. Domino must’ve had a conversation or something because Cutup, DB, Fives, and Echo seem to be more at ease beside the whole missing Hevy thing. I should write that conversation someday. Echo even repeats what Fives said and nobody makes a comment about it.

Hevy eventually surprises everyone with his dramatic entrance and marches through their bench area to head to the simulation room. After that, the three of them turn and look at Echo, who shrugs. Not really a moment between Echo and Fives and more about the whole squad, but it’s there. Domino’s getting along better as a whole, matching more of what the dynamic between those two has been the entire time.

And finally, the second final. Like how the practice test is slightly focused on Echo’s comments and the reactions to it, this one’s focused on Hevy being the natural leader he is. Also, just, Domino Working Together.

When they take cover in the little slit thingies, Fives and Echo take cover in the same one. Part of it was probably which one was closest. Part of it definitely was production trying to make it easier to fit more of them in the same frame there. But also, it says something about how they trust and understand each other on the battlefield. Partially from growing up training together, partially they've got the trust and understanding the whole squad is just finally starting to get within the rest of their dynamics.

The only scene in this whole episode I don’t know who’s who is during the medal scene. If we base it on where Hevy stands, Echo and Cutup are the ones to talk. However, the second clone doesn’t have Cutup’s accent and it’s not one of those situations that Cutup tends to drop his accent. So I’m not really sure, other than that Domino is very clearly all proud of each other. I’m not really sure why I wrote this paragraph then… aNyWaY, that’s the episode!

TL;DR Throughout the episode, the Domino Twins show multiple signs of them being close to each other. I really think that the episode is supposed to show us that they're close from the beginning and Rishi just made them form an even stronger bond. Paraphrasing Shaak Ti, their journey is about them connecting to the rest of their squad throughout the episode, not necessarily about them also learning to connect with each other. They’ve got that down, after all.

#b talks #arc trooper echo #arc trooper fives #domino twins #domino squad #echo #fives #clone cadets #star wars meta #clone wars meta

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collisiondiscourse · 3 years

Note

CODI CODI CODI

opinion on dynamight? :D

WKSDKEK HI AJ

okokokok if ur honestly... asking—i dont have any genuine hate for the name dynamight. its cute its fun and its very 4 year old kacchan. BUT i have this theory that it isnt his actual hero name. maybe i possibly am reaching very far and will pull a muscle with all this stretching and jumping to conclusions but... here are

Farfetched Reasons Why I Think DynaMight Isn't Bakugou's Final Name (SPOILER ALERT, duh):

1. It's too similar to his previous rejected names

We all remember how in the start of the series, Bakugou's whole naming problem stemmed from the extravagance and... overbearingness of his chosen aliases. From the most famous 'Lord Explosion Murder', the written kanji version being '爆殺王' and pronounced as 'Bakusatsuo'. In comparison, we have DynaMight: The God of Great Killing Bomb—which, taking the latter part is written '大爆殺神' in kanji and pronounced 'daibakusatsu-shin'. For a name that took maybe 4 or 5 years to FINALLY get introduced, its oddly similar to all the names that were already rejected or shot down. They even use 2 of the same kanji characters which denotes that they may even be said in the same aggressive tone like how it is in English (but take this point with a grain of salt bc i am NOT formally educated in Japanese.)

2. Narrative-wise... the timeline placement of the reveal just doesn't make sense.

I dunno about you, but in the middle of the war during the deconstruction of the pro-hero society seems like one of the weirder places to put Bakugou's hero name reveal. Especially when its something that doesn't have an immediate link or visibility to Bakugou's character aside from his personality. We've already seen that Bakugou's supposedly changed a LOT ever since his first days at UA—so I find it weird that in the MIDDLE OF HIS CHARACTER ARC and not even ten chapters after Bakugou Katsuki: Rising (where *ahem* important things occur...), we get a name like this which is awfully reminisce of Bakugo's choices pre-character development. Why make us wait so long if it was gonna be something so similar? Is the only change/nuance going to be the All Might pun? Hori-sensei may give us answers soon, but for now the timing seems incredibly out of place.

3. The other characters don't take it seriously.

Most of the other characters including the likes of Spinner absolutely do not take it seriously. Iida and multiple other actors at the scene poke criticisms at it and react in the same way class 1A did when Bakugo introduced Lord Explosion Murder. The only positive reaction being Mirio, who we all know is the human version of sunshine and puppies (and also just a really good senpai). The key reactions I wanna note are Deku's and Best Jeanist's.

- On Best Jeanist's reaction

BJ (its for shortening purposes i SWEAR) is seen to depict a lacklustre, disinterested, and almost even dissappointed response. As Katsuki's mentor figure and someone that was implied to have inspired Bakugou to reconsider his hero name—I find it odd that he was depicted to disapprove of it so offhandedly. His arrival and participation at the war was something I very much looked forward to due to the amount of things that Bakugou might do now that he knew Best Jeanist was still alive a la shounen anime 'I'm empowered by my mentor figure' style. I think that if Bakugou were to do a name reveal, he would've chosen something that Best Jeanist would immediately recognize as something resultant of Bkg's character development.

- On Izuku Midoriya's reaction (or lack thereof)

I won't elaborate bc it will actually take me weeks to formulate an essay, but Deku is currently at the epicenter of a lot of Katsuki's character development. From One for All to the tear jerking panels of Chapter 285, we know that Deku inexplicably is the no. 1 person that wants to know Bakugou's hero name.

So why isn't he there?

We don't get to see Deku's reaction to Bakugous huge name reveal because he's too far and too busy fighting. You'd a thunk that if it was so significant and powerful, Deku's reaction would come out. While it IS possible that Deku's reaction is on another chapter entirely bc he's just THAT excited about it, I highly doubt Bakugo would announce such a thing where Deku could not hear.

But Codi! you say, arms sore and floppy from reaching so far with me. Why? Why would Bakugou make and announce a fake name then?

Well. Prepare your ankles because I am about to jump to some even FARTHER conclusions.

First of all, they ARE in the middle of a war. Bakugou, while heavily injured, still is smart enough to see what's happening and be able to parse when they're on the losing end. Mans is a 4/5 on the intelligence rank if I'm not mistaken, and it's pretty obvious the heroes are losing. The whole hero society has been absolutely turned up on its head with the Todoroki Family Drama, and I think that Deku jumping back into the fight is the best indication that Katsuki will follow suit. I think that Deku knew about the hero name DynaMight before hand, ESPECIALLY because it sounds like something only he and Kacchan could come up with (the All Might pun is just TOO good ok). I think that there's a reason Bakugou's okay with Deku being so far away when he reveals it

But what of it?

I think that to understand Bakugou's decision to name reveal now involves taking a look into the actual name DynaMight/Dynamite.

Dynamite, as we know, is an explosive made from nitroglycerine and stabilizers in 1867. The reason it became so popular was that it helped with a lot infrastructure projects to speed up construction and mining. It was available soon as well in the civillian market because of its powerful but controlled explosions. Instead of a fiery explosion that burned for extended periods of time, nitroglycerine was more of a one and done kind of explosion.

Later, it was used as a military weapon that caused mass destruction and a sudden interest for innovations in explosives. Alfred Nobel, who's name you now might recognize, was ashamed of his past inventions and alias as 'The Angel of Death' (Bakusatsuo, anyone?). He hated the fact his explosives had been used to cause war and death and thus created the Nobel Peace Prize so that his name would be associated with Peace and Hope instead.

If you're picking up what I'm reaching really hard for... then you already know.

The reason I think Bakugou faked DynaMight as his hero name is to act as an actual sort of Dynamite in the tide of the war. I think this was, in actuality, a code word or even tactic of some sorts for an actual plan he had with Deku. Now that he's both revealed his name AND joined the fight again, the attention of all the villains and actors (including us, the audience) are on him and him only. Because 'Dynamite' is a controlled explosion. Because 'Dynamite' works once nefore its done its job. Because Bakugou mfing Katsuki does NOT wanna be associated with his past decisions and history of destruction and wants his name to be a symbol of winning and saving.

A symbol of peace.

Or. maybe its actually just DynaMight. idk. who knows? Maybe Im just really really really really deep in denial.

Thanks for reading!

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aspiring-ginger · 4 years

Text

Thunderstorms Ch.1 (Fellowship x Reader)

Summary: Reader is in for a pretty large and unexpected surprise when a massive thunderstorm hits. How did the Fellowship of the Ring end up in your backyard?

Warnings: Language

Word count: 3,151

Pairing(s): Platonic Fellowship of the ring x fem!reader, eventual romantic interest (Lord of the Rings)

Who do you want Reader to end up with? Vote here!

A/N: Okay, absolutely no one asked for this, but here we are. I’ve been kicking myself for not doing requests or FMN ch2 because of terrible writers block but I got a random stroke of inspiration and decided to write this. I figured it’d be better to write anything than nothing at all! Because this is in a modern setting, reader is from the US because I am, and any slang I use I want to be authentic and don’t want to offend anyone by trying to pass it off as somewhere else. I hope y’all enjoy this!

Comments and feedback are always appreciated! Let me know if you want more!

Taglist: @thunderdog8

Masterlist I Next

You stretched out your stiff muscles as you stood from your desk chair. You rubbed your hand down your face and paused your music, deciding that it was time to take a break and make some lunch. Groaning as you opened the refrigerator door you called out,

"Alexa, play some music" Not really caring what it picked as long as it was something.

You were home alone in your childhood house, and any noise was a much needed distraction from the eerie creaking and groaning of the building around you. Your parents were off in their summer home down south having to take care of some repairs or leasing or something, so they left you in charge. You didn't mind, it was a place to stay while you worked and took online classes to finish school. Plus, you had the whole place to yourself, so it didn't matter how messed up your sleep schedule was, or how much noise you made.

You would have to go to the store soon, you thought to yourself, glancing around your mostly empty shelves to find something edible. You decided on a quick sandwich and some fruit, grabbing the necessary ingredients and humming along to the music as you worked.

When you finished, you debated watching something as you ate or simply eating as you worked. You decided on the former- after all, you'd been on top of all your school work so there was no rush to get anything done. With that decision out of the way now you just had to decide what exactly to watch. You sat down on the couch with your drink and food in hand, looking around the living room for inspiration.

It had been awhile since you watched any of your favorites again, you thought as your eyes landed on a Harry Potter DVD that had been collecting dust on top of your playstation from whenever you watched it last. But no, you weren't really in the mood for wizards. Pirates of the Caribbean? That was always a good one. Plus, it had Orlando Bloom in it so….yay. You snapped your fingers- that was it! Lord of the Rings! It still had Orlando Bloom, but it had that deep fantasy setting you've been craving. You popped in the first disc of Fellowship, extended edition of course, and began happily munching on your lunch.

---

Your heart swelled as the credits rolled, remembering just how much you loved those movies. The scenery, costumes, soundtrack, actors, everything about it was just so, so, ugh! You just loved it so much. You grew up on these movies and they always had a special place in your heart.

They were still super long, though, and you needed to get back to work. You cleaned up the living room and headed back upstairs to finish your essay for class. Smiling, you decided to put on the soundtrack from fellowship instead of whatever you were listening to last. Maybe then you would get more inspiration? Or at least time would pass quicker. Whatever it was, you just needed more to satisfy your lotr craving. You were definitely watching the other two movies when you were done.

You got several hours of good work done, not even realizing when your music had switched to the two towers. You were snapped out of your work-zone when a clap of thunder sounded outside, and you realized just how dark it was. The only light in the room was your computer screen. You went to turn on the light and continue working when you saw lightning flash from outside your window. Frowning, you remembered when you checked the weather this morning and the chance of rain was very low. Of course meteorologists are never really 100% right all the time, but this seemed a little off. How could they miss a huge thunderstorm?

You just shrugged and sat back down at your desk to finish- you were so close to being done! At least you'd sleep well later to the sound of rain. You saved your document just go be safe. Yeah your program autosaved your work but you couldn't be too careful if there was a storm. What if the power went out? Whatever, you just needed to focus to finish the last two paragraphs and then you'd be done.

You glanced up to your window as you began to type when- a huge rumble of thunder shook your whole house and lightning flashed incredibly bright. You felt the weight of the thunder even rattle your insides as you were seemingly blinded by the lightning. Blinking, you looked around to see what the hell just happened. There was nothing but darkness around you, your monitor no longer showing the essay you'd been working on for so long. You were right- the power went out. And holy shit were you glad you saved.

If the thunder and lightning were so close together, that meant the storm was above you, right? You stood up to get a closer look out your window. Wind was howling, whipping the rain and trees all around in the torrential downpour. Thunder rumbled and lightning flashed again, slightly farther apart this time, and what you saw outside….well you definitely didn't expect.

The brief flash of light illuminated figures of people laying down in your backyard. What? You rubbed your eyes and looked harder out into the darkness, still seeing the motionless shapes. Your backyard was fenced in and locked, there was no way so many people could get in. And why were they just laying there? In the rain?? You were so utterly confused. There was just no way. You had to be going crazy. This was just you seeing things in the shadows because you were home alone. It was nothing.

Your stomach churned as you paced around your office. Should you go outside? Or at least downstairs to get a closer look? What if they needed help and were stuck in the rain? There were some woods beyond your property so maybe they wandered in. But no. Were you crazy? That's how stupid people always die in horror films. Something incredibly weird and scary happens and they go check it out. And then they get brutally murdered or something. No. Out of the question. You tried to tell yourself that you were just seeing things, making shapes out of shadows for nothing. There was nothing there. But no, your stomach didn't agree. Your gut told you there really were people out there. You saw them in the flash of light. If they were just shadows, you wouldn't have seen anything from the lightning.

Okay, so, there really were people in your yard. What should you do? Call the police? And then what? Hi officer I think I see a bunch of men in my backyard. No they're just laying there. How dumb would that sound?? Ugh no, you couldn't do that. If they were just laying there….how long had they been there? You certainly didn't see anything from the kitchen during lunch. The knot in your stomach twisted further. If they ended up needing help or something and you just sat there doing nothing, you would end up kicking yourself about it later.

Ugh! Curse your stupid moral compass and your need to help others. If this was how you died by being the stupid person in a scary movie, then so be it. You used the flashlight from your phone to light the way through your house, throwing on some shoes and a raincoat as you headed downstairs. Since it was still light out when you were last down here, the blinds were all open and you had a good view outside of both the front and back. There were definitely people out there. Now that you were closer you could make out at least...8 bodies in the grass? You crept into the kitchen and shined your flashlight out the glass door. Your light reflected off of several of the figures. You thought they might be wearing reflective gear or something, but the light wasn't as bright as it should've been. No, that was metal that reflected the light.

You squeezed your eyes shut and clenched your fists in hopes of gathering up some courage. You sighed and tried to calm your nerves. You reached out and unlocked the door, pausing to see if the bodies would react to the noise. They didn't flinch, so after a moment you pulled the door open, and slid the screen door to the side . They didn't react to that either, so you stepped out into the rain.

Without turning your back on them, you stepped around to the wood pile nearby, glancing back to grab a long stick. There was no way you were gonna touch these strangers. Stick in hand, you crept up to the nearest one. Upon closer inspection, you saw what was reflecting the light from the door. Laying in front of you was a man with dark medium length hair. His clothes were ragged, a green cloak hung around his shoulders. It certainly looked nothing like anyone would wear currently. Strangest of all, however, was a sword strapped to his back along with what appeared to be a blanket. Tilting your phone around, it looked very real. A foam sword or prop wouldn't shine like that.

You looked over to another figure and saw a similar sight. A man with medium length hair and a green cloak but instead of a sword on his back, he had a large round shield with what you think was a sword strapped to his hip. What the fuck? You glanced to another, a man with long blond hair and a matching green cloak but this time with a bow, daggers, and a quiver full of arrows at his back. You knew these props. It looked so familiar. Your breathing picked up as you looked over another figure. This one was much smaller. He had shorter, currier hair and again the same matching green cloak. Where the other men had boots however, this man...child(?)'s feet were bare. And large. Much larger than you would think for someone of his size.

The pit in your stomach sank much deeper. You knew who these men were, or, at least trying to be. You literally just watched the first freaking movie. You identified each member of the fellowship of the ring. Aragon was in front of you, followed by Boromir, then Legolas. You saw Frodo, Sam, and you couldn't tell which one was Merry or Pippin from this distance but there were definitely four Hobbits. The furthest figure must've been Gimli. Gandalf was not among them, but that would make sense given the rest of the fellowships matching green cloaks. You were definitely freaking out now. There were a bunch of freaking cosplayers passed out in your yard? What the hell were you gonna do now? Your thoughts were racing, but your stomach was faring much worse. Somehow, you thought, it was much worse than it seemed.

You thrust your stick forward, prodding at the 'Aragorn' that lay at your feet. He didn't stir, so you poked a little harder. You thought you saw his breathing quicken, but reached forward with your stick anyway, just for good measure. The man shot up and grabbed your stick away from you in one fluid motion, drawing his blade with his other hand.

You stood like a deer in headlights, unmoving with eyes wide. The man held his sword out at you, pointing it at your throat while he glanced at his surroundings. You blinked and quickly threw your hands up in surrender, dropping your phone in the grass. Thankfully, it landed face down so it still provided some light. Rain continued to pour.

'Aragorn' looked back at his companions all strewn about then turned back towards you, thrusting his sword in warning.

"Who are you and what have you done to them?" The man spoke and you just stared, mouth agape.

"What is this place? Answer me!" He insisted and took a step forward bringing the blade closer to your throat. There was no way that thing was a prop. That thing looked sharp.

You tried to speak, your mouth suddenly dry and tongue getting caught in your throat. His yelling, it seemed, was loud enough to wake the others, as they began to stir.

"Aragorn. What is this place, what is going on?" You heard another voice speak and a blade removed from its sheath. Boromir stepped up to Aragorn's side and held his blade out at you as well.

Your mind was racing at 100mph but you were just frozen in place, shock taking over your body. How were you supposed to respond to this? What were you supposed to do? Looking at each of them, that was, without a shadow of a doubt, Aragorn and Boromir.

"I-I…" you began, trying to form the right words. Aragorn simply raised a brow, "I-uh.. my name is (y/n) and um, you're in my backyard? I have no idea how you got here."

"Your yard? This is your house?"

"Uh- yeah um...do you want to come inside?" Aragorn and Boromir exchanged glances.

"How are you so quick to invite us in? What do you want from us?"

"Nothing!" You answered a bit too quickly, your voice going up in pitch, "Uh I mean n-nothing. I don't want anything from you. I was just writing in my house when the thunder hit and I looked outside and you all were just laying here, so I came out to see what was going on. Look, I wasn't even armed!" You gestured to your stick that was still in Aragorn's hand.

He glanced down at it and indeed, it wasn't even sharp. He dropped it to the ground, calling out something in elvish, you only picked up Legolas' name. He responded in kind, and Aragorn nodded. He called out another phrase and turned back to you.

"You seem to be telling the truth, and we have no memory of how we arrived. We are in no position to refuse such a generous offer, but know this-" he twirled the sword in his hand before sheathing it, "should you try anything, we are armed." Boromir did the same, and you nodded in agreement. Legolas was helping the others up.

"Please, um, follow me." You weren't sure if you should let them go first or show them in, so you decided to enter before them to show that you really didn't have any traps or anything malicious.

You held your back door open for them as they entered one by one, all looking around at their strange new surroundings. Aragorn was last to enter, and you awkwardly shut the door behind them and locked it. They all looked to you expectantly, dripping water all over your kitchen.

Aragorn cleared his throat and took a small step forward. "I am Aragorn, son of Arathorn. This here is Boromir of Gondor, Legolas of the Woodland Realm, and Gimli, son of Gloin. The halflings are Meriadoc Brandybuck, Peregrin Took, Samwise Gamgee and, Frodo Baggins." Each bowed their heads as they were introduced. "And your name once more, my lady?"

"(Y/n) (l/n)....of Earth..?" You winced as you added the 'earth' bit. Here you were with your childhood heroes all standing in your kitchen, and you were just making a complete fool of yourself.

"You have our gratitude, my lady. " Aragorn put a hand at his heart. "Would you, perhaps, direct us back on course so we may be on our way? We would hate to impose." He glanced around your kitchen as he spoke, looking curiously at your appliances.

"Um..about that." You began to sweat. How the fuck are you supposed to tell them that they're in a completely different world with little to no chance of getting home?! "Uh, please um take a seat if you want. This um.. is going to be hard to explain." The men gave you strange looks while the hobbits pulled out your four kitchen chairs and sat down.

"You're not in Middle-Earth any more, but that's pretty obvious I guess. Uh, here it's called Earth. Just Earth, no middle. We don't really have any kingdoms here, each country has their own elected officials or dictators. We're in the United States of America, or the US for short. You um… you're in a different world than yours. And time, I guess. We're also a lot more advanced with our technology than you. Oh shit- um.. I realize now that it's weird that I know you're from Middle-Earth but let me explain ummm" you were definitely panicking now "Middle-Earth exists here? But.. to us, it's just a work of fiction, a story from a book. A really popular book. Like, the whole world has probably at least heard of it. So you're all um, characters in the book. Well, books actually. It's a series. Um, the author is J. R. R. Tolkien and the series is called The Lord of the Rings. And movies too. Really famous movies…" you trailed off.

They all stared at you in shock.

"I can prove it! Here….you must still be in the first book, The Fellowship of the Ring. I mean no offense, but I'm guessing that you just went through Moria and then Lothlorien, and were making your way down the river Anduin and planning to approach Mordor from the north...right?"

Their eyes went wide and they all exchanged looks.

"How do you know that?" Gimli asked.

"Well uh, I can tell because of your cloaks. You got them from Lorien, they have the leaves. And they look new, they're not that dirty yet. And Gandalf isn't with you.." you finished sheepishly. You almost said because Boromir was still there. And they were all still together. Thank god you kept that information to yourself.

"So," Boromir began, "Your entire world knows of the ring? And our mission?"

"Of course!" Their shoulders sagged so you quickly added, "Well the books and movies are super popular! A ton of people know your story, but that's a good thing! Everyone knows your story because they love it and they're rooting for you. They want your mission to succeed and to see the ring destroyed, too." They looked visibly relieved. " I swear on my life that I want nothing to do with the ring and I want you to succeed at all costs. I've grown up loving the books and the movies, so it really means a lot to me." You swallowed as you realized how awkward that sounded.

"Thats nice but, what's a movie?" Pippin asked.

Oh god, this was going to be a very long night.

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jeagerism · 4 years

Text

wish you were here

✒ word count : 4.2k

✒ characters : park jimin x reader

✒ warnings : sadness, like hella sadness im sorry, break up!au, reader just misses him lots, small amounts of fluff, cursing, seeing the person you love with someone new, first dates, moving on, crying

✒ summary : You're sitting in your bathtub eating marshmallows at 3 in the morning three weeks after the break up, and you're doing fine, you really are. But then, all of a sudden, you're crying and realising how much you miss him.

✒ author's note : as i wrote more and more i was like...hmmm. jimin. here is the completed fic im scared to post this didusissj but if i don't i might die so. hope u guys like dis one xoxo it's my first jimin imagine pls do not hurt me im trying :o

It's 6 p.m. on a Saturday when it happens.

The curtains are open slightly in the living room, rays of golden sunlight reaching just past where your feet rest on the couch. You're typing up an essay when Jimin slips through the door, toeing his shoes off. Five-fifty, just like clockwork. The coat he wears everyday goes on the same hook - third from the left. He shuffles over to the couch and presses his lips to the crown of your head, just like always.

It's easy to fall into routine.

Another episode of Sex Education plays in the background, long forgotten after an hour of staring at the same screen. You're pretty sure your brain is fried. But you'd made a promise to yourself that you'd finish this essay today, so you make due.

"Hey." The way your lips stretch into a smile is hard to control, even more so when he copies your actions. He falls onto the couch beside you, leaning into the cushions with a hum. He smells like the strawberries and honey body wash in the bathroom.

You let your eyes study him for a few seconds, then go back to typing, and it's quiet, just like always. It feels normal. Nothing's different.

Until it is.

"I think we should break up."

Of the five years you've known Jimin, you've been through a lot. And while most of it had been dealing with things much bigger than yourselves, bigger than romance and first kisses, you'd had your fair share of relationship issues.

But things were good. He would come home every day, smiling, press that same kiss to your forehead. Sit right beside you, leaning into your side, his warmth seeping into you. Sometimes he'd play with your fingers, a thing that kept him occupied and calm. You knew Jimin, you knew all his habits, what made him tick, how he acted when he was sad, or happy, or angry.

"Y/N?"

"I can't", you breathe out, so softly it's barely audible. And you wonder if he can even hear you. If he can hear the way you're trying to gather up everything you're feeling right now and trying to shove it down, down, down. "I don't understand? I need, can you-"

And as much as you know Jimin, he knows you all the same. He knows you're panicking, and normally, he'd grab your hands and help you breathe. In for three, out for three. In for three out for three. He doesn't do that this time. He doesn't even look at you.

"I'm just not...happy. I'm not happy and I don't think I make you happy anymore, either."

But you do. He does, Jimin makes you so happy that sometimes you forget how to breathe. He makes you so happy that you love everything about him, even the things that drive you insane sometimes. So happy that you pick up the clothes he leaves on the floor after his shower, or place his shoes back neatly, or cook his favorite food for him whenever he asks.

These are the things you want to tell him. You want to tell him it all and more, but the only thing that comes out is :

"Okay."

Because what else can you say? He's just said that he's not happy with you anymore, and he's so close but farther away than ever, and he's not even looking at you.

In for three, out for three. But you still can't breathe. And this time, as his words fall on near deaf ears - something about "my stuff" and "sometime later" and "you stay, I'll go" - and he slips his shoes and coat back on, and it's quiet, it's not because you're happy.

You can't breathe because it hurts. You're not sure of how long you stay on the couch, computer running hot on your lap, a "Are you still watching" message on the tv. But when you finally look up, it's dark.

And you take a breath. Dragging yourself to Jimin and your bedroom - your bedroom - takes more of an effort than you'll admit, but you get there. The pillow is cool against your burning cheek. You allow your eyes to close tight, because his side of the bed is never this cold.

All you can do is breathe. In for three, out for three. Something you'd learned from him, with him.

It's all you can do to keep yourself from breaking.

He takes you on your first date in September.

It's bowling, which is a stereotypical first date, but it's him, so you don't really mind.

Park Jimin is nervous. It's evident in the way he wipes his hands on his pants before he holds your hand. The way he gets quiet after laughing at one of your jokes, as if he's afraid of being too loud or happy.

"No fair!", you call, speaking through a pout. "You've got like, superhuman abilities or something. You're obviously gonna win." Crossing your arms, you shake your head. "I think we should label this as cheating."

Jimin chuckles, rubbing the back of his neck. "I'm not trying, though."

You make a noise of protest. "That's even worse!" Leaning closer to him, a furrow in your eyebrows, you huff. "Are you saying I'm just plain ole bad at bowling, Park?"

"You said it, not me." It's the first joke he's made all night. You laugh, eyes closing just from the force. "I could, uh, I could help you? If you want. Since I'm so good and everything." The last part is said teasingly, and you can hear the smirk in his voice.

You stand, ruffling his hair with a smile. "Teach me then." By the time you've grabbed the ball you've been using the entire time, he's right behind you. Sticking your fingers in the holes, you twist it around lightly.

"I see why you're so bad now." You turn, opening your mouth to defend yourself. "You're not even holding the ball right, you know."

"Well, I'm sorry I was never taught bowling ball holding basics. I didn't even know you could hold one of these-"

He interrupts you with a hand on your waist, delicate and soft. His fingers rest just above the top of your jeans, brushing against soft skin. "Like this", he murmurs. Jimin's other hand adjusts your own. "And then this." He keeps his hand atop yours, and brings your arm back, helping you swing it forward. You're so focused on how close he is that you don't notice you still need to let go of the ball.

Lips brushing against the side of your cheek, Jimin hums. You shiver. "You know, this doesn't actually work unless you let go of the ball when you swing, pretty girl."

You feel like you're going to combust. Park Jimin just called you pretty. Park Jimin, the boy you've had a crush on for months. Called you pretty. Blinking, you swing your arm back with him again, and let it go when it comes forward. Not caring if the ball hits the pins or not, you rotate, until you're face to face with him. All soft, silky hair and lips that look as soft as pillows.

"What?" He raises an eyebrow, another pretty flush spreading over his cheeks.

"Can I kiss you?"

The noise that comes from him mirrors the shock on his face that quickly morphs into timidness. "Like you even have to ask, Y/N."

His lips feel even softer than they look. You've had a first kiss before, but this is the only one that's felt right. Something in you tells you that means something. When you pull away, you're smiling, breathless.

"Hey", Jimin whispers, nodding his head behind you. "You knocked down all the pins."

As he walks you home, he holds your hand.

"I'm glad we got to do this", Jimin says, and his eyes don't meet your own until you squeeze his hand tight. You think about how he'd wrapped you up in the extra sweater he'd been wearing when he'd noticed you were cold. How he'd pulled you closer when walking down the sidewalk because people were bumping into you, and had held you that way the entire way back.

"Me too." You grin, watching the pink on his cheeks spread to his ears and down his neck. His smile mirrors yours regardless.

Jimin sighs. "I'm, um, sorry if it was lame. I know bowling is kinda...well, kinda bland for a first date-"

"It was perfect." You let your fingers detangle as you back up. "Best first date I've ever had."

His cheeks swell with a big, boyish grin. "Next time I'll take you to the arcade downtown." A smirk. "Maybe that time you can beat me in something."

You always thought that if Jimin ever left you, you'd cry.

Not that you thought of it often, but it still came up once or twice. Every time it did, he was always right there, with soothing words and soft lips pressed against the tip of your nose.

So, the fact that you don't cry surprises you.

You don't cry, and a part of you thinks that, if you did, it would never stop.

Your sadness turns into anger at every reminder of him around your apartment. There's traces of him everywhere, a forced memory no matter where you step. So you keep breathing. You take a breath.

You take a breath when you see his lunchbox he took to work with him every day. When you visit your friends and they ask how plans for the yearly Halloween party you'd always throw with him are going. When you see a news article about him and the boy's album release. You breathe.

Because you are angry with him. Angry for making you waste your time, making you think that it was you and him. That he still loved you, and that you knew him.

Going back in your head, everything had seemed fine. The two of you hardly fought, you told each other I love you every morning and every night. You still had your weekly movie nights every Friday. You laughed together.

Nothing had changed, right? You knew him, right?

A week after he's been gone, it hits you that you never knew him that well at all.

You didn't even know him well enough to tell that he was falling out of love with you.

Two weeks after the breakup, and you no longer feel angry. You feel the dragging feeling of sadness creep up on you again. The anger probably would've stayed, but he'd come to get his stuff earlier in the week.

He forgets a few things, but you don't say anything. Why don't you say anything?

Getting used to life without him is a process. You forget that you don't have to buy those off brand crackers he likes. You never wake up in the morning to his humming in the shower. Things...change.

The bed was never this big, was it? It always seemed small, small enough that the two of you always crowded together, legs tangled together, arms around waists.

Now, it's massive. You pull the blanket up to your chin, and even though you probably shouldn't, you press your cheek into his pillow.

When you fall asleep, you dream of him.

His skin is bathed in moonlight, pale and soft. The two of you sit in the big clawfoot bathtub, the one you both loved, empty and fully clothed. He's quiet, and anyone else would think that's because it's nearing three in the morning, but you know him. You recognize the subtle shaking of his hands, the sweat beading at his hairline even though it was freezing inside the apartment, the way he taps his fingers together in rhythm.

You know him.

"Hey." It's the first word spoken since you'd sat down. He's facing you, curls going every which way from attempting to sleep earlier. Holding up the bag you'd snagged before you'd followed him in here, you grin. "Want some marshmallows?"

Jimin's lips twitch into a smile, and even though it disappears as quickly as it came, it's something. Massive hand plunging into the bag, he grabs a handful and proceeds to shove a few in his mouth. You settle for popping them in one by one; the small, colorful bits melt on your tongue.

The bag empties faster than expected, so soon you have nothing to occupy yourselves. As you start to suggest opening the other bag in the pantry, he speaks.

"It's happening again", his shoulders rise up to his ears. His hands rest in between his knees, tangled together, fidgeting.

With a heavy sigh, you lay a hand across his own. "I know." Jimin's eyes meet yours, honey colored and exhausted. The bags under his eyes are more prominent than they have been, and although it's not as bad as the last few times, it's still bad.

"I don't want it to happen again."

And well, you don't quite know what to say to that. Because you don't either. This feeling was always with him, always simmering underneath the surface. It never completely disappeared, but it did get easier to deal with. It was bearable, almost nonexistent at times.

You know it hurts him, and him hurting makes you hurt. He deserves so much good, he is too good, to have so much weight on his shoulders. To be plagued with so much anxiety and pain, and for what? You don't even know the answer.

No one is perfect, as living with him for this many years often reminds you. He's definitely not. He leaves his shoes in the middle of the floor. He forgets to replace the tissue when the roll runs out. He's never had a plant that's lasted more than a week, because he's either not here or just forgets.

So no, he's not perfect. But you know damn well he's the closest thing to it you have.

"I'll be here." You swallow, fingers slotting in between his. "I am here. No matter what, rain or shine, you know that." Jimin lifts the side of his lips into a smile. "I love you."

Switching in his spot, he turns, leaning back against your chest, rejoining your hands soon after. "I know." He brushes his lips across your knuckles. "I love you, too."

Your other hand combs through his hair, twirling curls around your fingers like thread.

The two of you don't retire to your bed until the sun begins to peak over the horizon.

You wake up with sweat beading at your hairline.

In for three, out for three.

You ignore the phantom taste of marshmallows on your tongue. A shaky hand pushes the blankets off of your body, and you're taking the familiar path to the kitchen before you can really think. There's a bag of mini marshmallows where they always are. You grab them, tearing a whole in the top as you walk towards the bathroom.

When your back meets the familiar chill of the tub, you can feel the way your throat begins closing up. But you push it away with a hand full of marshmallows, which distracts you from the aching burn settled deep in your chest.

You've never done this alone. Every time you've sat in this exact same position, marshmallows in hand, he's been here. But there's always time for change. At least that's what you tell yourself.

You'd spent all your time in this tub with Jimin. There weren't any more of those times. No more late night baths where you just talked about your days. No more pic nics on the living room floor when you didn't feel like going out. No more hugs or I love you's or simply just seeing him across the room.

And another. In for three, out for three. Focus on something else. Anything else but him. Your eyes switch from the wall to the bottle of soap on the ledge of the tub. Strawberries and honey. His favorite. Something else. The two towels hanging on the rack, one yellow and one red. You remember picking them out the night you moved in. It's getting harder to see with the tears in your eyes, but it's fine. It's fine.

Because you don't miss him. You can't, because the smell of strawberries and honey are fading from the pillow that's beside yours. The red towel hasn't been used in a month. There's never a box of off-brand crackers with his name on them in the cabinet anymore. And he's not here.

And you can't wish that he is.

September is different this time.

The streets are full of people, and you're filled with a happy sort of warmth as you wait outside of a coffee shop. Rubbing your hands together, you blow warm air on them to rid yourself of the numbness starting to creep in. It's the type of cold that sets in slowly. You nudge your nose against the scarf you're wearing with a shiver.

People around you pass by with smiles, arms full of bags or holding others hands. It's peaceful.

"You're going to drop them!"

Glancing up, your eyes dart around until they find the source of the noise. There's a part of you that wishes you hadn't. A part of you that wants to shove your nose back into the fabric around your neck.

Seeing Park Jimin is...weird.

There's a certain type of irony in the way that you see him during your first September without him. It twists and tears at you with bleeding fists.

"Jimin, let me carry some!"

The girl next to him is pretty. She's more than pretty. Jealousy ebbs in your chest for a mere moment at the smile he gives her, the way his eyes sparkle. Remembering how he used to look at you like that pours salt onto the wound.

His hair is blond now. He looks good. Jimin had always looked good, though. There's no doubt in your mind that he's one of the prettiest people you've ever met. But he looks good. He looks like he's glowing. He looks...happy.

I'm just not...happy anymore.

"I've got it", he laughs, leaning his head back with a smile. Turning, he regains his grip on the bags, switching his gaze over, over, over. "See, like…" His eyes are sparkling. He looks happy. Is this what he meant?

I'm not happy and I don't think I make you happy anymore, either.

"Y/N?"

You quickly avert your eyes, turning and stuffing your hands into your pockets with a huff of breath you can see in the cold air. For a second, you can hear his footsteps getting closer. Of all the ways you thought you'd bump into him, it was safe to say this wasn't on the list. Seeing him wasn't on the list at all. Avoiding the problem until it went away seemed like a good enough plan.

Just as you're ready to turn around and face him, even if you really do not want to, a hand lands on your shoulder. Gentle.

The endless run on thoughts of what you're going to say become muddled as you open your eyes.

"Sorry it took so long. Since someone wanted peppermint hot chocolate, even though they were obviously going to be running out, I had to wait a little longer." The corner of his lips lift into a grin. "Didn't mind though. Anything for you, I suppose."

You shake your head with a smile as he hands you the cup. "Thank you." The drink warms your hands, the numbness melting away.

"Ready to go?"

Jimin's behind you. Jimin is behind you with a girl who may not even be his girlfriend, but a girl who makes him happy. Makes him smile.

And you think you're a little okay with it.

You don't really have a choice, but. It's easier to swallow than you'd expected.

You've learned to live without him. And even though there's a piece of you screaming and throwing a fit like a child that just wants and wants, you don't break.

"Yeah. I am."

Pivoting, you walk forward. He's still relatively far away, but close enough that you can see him in your peripheral vision. Close enough that you make eye contact once more as he readjusts the bags in his arms. Close enough that you see the sparkle in his eyes.

You take a breath as your shoulders pass, mere inches of space between you. He still feels far away.

In for three, out for three. Breathe in.

It smells like strawberries and honey.

You smack your lips together as you continue on.

You're craving marshmallows.

Two Months Before

Park Jimin is scared.

Which isn't something he'd normally admit so easily. But, given the circumstances, he doesn't think too much of it.

Filling his cheeks with air, he gnaws on his bottom lip in thought. He's been chewing on it for so long he'll probably tear a whole in it, but he can't help it. Thinking back on the conversation he'd had hours before scares him. Leaves him with an unsettling feeling in his stomach. Anxious, deadly butterflies.

"How're things with Y/N?" Taehyung sits back, sipping from a stark white coffee mug. "Not that we don't see you guys every two weeks, but, you know."

Jimin laughs, shaking his head. "They're good. She's good, amazing." He's smiling so wide his cheeks hurt.

"God, stop looking like a lovesick fool", his friend teases. He tilts his head, scoffing. "Propose already." Jimin must look as lost as he feels, because Taehyung raises an eyebrow. "You okay?"

He blinks, rolling his shoulders. "Yeah, I'm good. I guess I just...never thought about it. Marriage and stuff. I mean, I have, I just…" He shrugs, eyebrows furrowed. "Never really thought about it too in detail." Why does his stomach feel like this?

"Do you want to marry her?"

"Yes." The answer is instant. Something hidden underneath, but something all known.

Taehyung smiles. "That was pretty fast. Are you sure you've never thought about it?"

Jimin wets his lips, clearing his throat. "Guess it just...doesn't make sense with anyone else. It makes sense with her though. It feels right."

The blue haired male across from him smirks, huffing out a laugh. "Guess you'll need a ring then, huh?"

Marriage had always been a far away concept. Something to be worried about later down the line. It seemed like, without even realising it, down the line had come sooner than he expected. He's known Y/N for five years, and while every moment has been one he wouldn't give up, it's sped by so fast.

But when he thinks about it, it doesn't make sense if it isn't her. Nothing makes sense if it's not her. If he closes his eyes and pictures his wedding day, no matter what, in every scenario, every way you look at it, she's the one walking down the aisle. Every time. It's her.

Jimin reaches into the dresser drawer beside the bed, feeling around until he finds what he's searching for. His fingers brush against the velvet box he'd shoved in there an hour earlier. When he brings it out, the butterflies in his stomach have friends.

He wants to marry her. He wants to do it right. He wants to put this ring on her finger and watch her eyes light up. And plan the wedding with her and discuss color schemes and where to seat guests at the reception. Wants to kiss her in front of a room of people as his wife for the first time. He wants to adopt a dog and buy a house with a backyard.

Park Jimin wants to do all of this, and he wants it to feel right, and it only feels right with her.

But if she said no. If she didn't want him the way he wanted her. Park Jimin is terrifyingly in love with her. The type of love that makes him crazy. That makes him wake up early just to pull her back into his arms, because he knows how she likes being held. Because he knows her.

So if she didn't need him like he needed her, he doesn't think he'd be able to handle it. Because she may be able to walk away and find someone new, but he won't.

She's it for him. This is it for him. He doesn't think there's ever gonna be anyone else.

He's loved her every day since the moment he met her.

The not wanting is what might tear him to pieces. Can nervous butterflies die?

The sound of keys turning in lock nab his attention, and he jumps to his feet, heart in his throat. Something in him aches. "Jimin? I'm home!"

Rubbing his thumb over the velvet box once more, he slips it back into the drawer, way in the back. He closes it, and breathes. In for three, out for three. Jimin looks up, and puts on a smile, even with this ache.

He loves her.

"Coming!"

✒ tags : @lysjeon @goldenlilyz @savageprince7

#park jimin imagine #park jimin x y/n #park jimin x reader #park jimin x you #park jimin #jimin #jimin x reader #jimin x y/n #jimin x you #park jimin imagines #jimin imagines #jimin imagine #bts imagine #bts imagines #bts x reader #bts x y/n #bts x you #bts #dej_writes

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connordavidscamera · 4 years

Text

Love Notes | Connor Brashier

A/n: I would like to thank the person in the dorm next to me for inspiring this meet cute situation. *there might be a part 2 or a blurb to follow this because there is a specific part that isn’t in here that I promised Rina.

Summary: someone on your floor has been playing piano and you can’t not love it. (college!AU)

Warnings: none

Word count: 3.5k

***

It’s been one of those days. You know the one where you’re awake, you’re alive, but you can’t seem to focus on anything. You’re going through the motions, but you can’t sit still, can’t pay attention in your lecture, can’t get yourself to work on a homework assignment for more than five whole minutes. Yeah, it’s one of those. I’ve been alternating between scrolling through my phone and working on this five page essay that’s due Friday that I currently only have an introduction for. Well… if you consider two sentences an introduction. My professor definitely would not.

I sigh and toss my phone on my bed, where it bounces and lands on the floor with a loud thud. I groan and run my hands over my face, maybe I just need caffeine. However, getting said caffeine would mean walking all the way across campus for a $5 cup from Starbucks that definitely would not keep me awake without a few extra espresso shots. It’s not worth it. But then again, maybe the walk outside would do me good. (Not that it did this morning when I was walking to class.)

I’m grabbing my shoes from my closet when the first note fills the room. And then the second and the third. At first, I think I’m imagining it, maybe it’s coming from my computer, but then I remember that I didn’t have music on. The notes get faster, louder, almost more aggressive, like the person playing them is pushing harder on the keys. But it still sounds so pretty - I might be a little biased though because I’ve always been a sucker for piano. I’ve always wanted to learn how to play too, but I never had the chance to take classes.I stand there for a while, just listening. It’s so pretty, soothing.

It takes me a minute too long to figure out what the song is, because every time I think I have it, I’m wrong. But it’s a popular song. Not new though. At least a few years old. One that was played on every radio station for months and months. Thinking Out Loud by Ed Sheeran, I finally decide. And that’s when the melody comes to me and I find myself humming along to it. And that’s when I realize that I’ve finally focused on something for more than a second.

The notes continue to fill the room as I look over at my abandoned paper. Their fingers on the keys though, are slowing down just as I sit in my chair, convinced that if they just keep playing a little bit longer, I can get through maybe half of this essay. And much to my delight, they do keep playing once they finish the other song. It stops for just a moment though, probably to think of another one to play. This one I don’t recognize at all, but it’s soothing and while they continue to heat each beautiful, melodic note, I type away at my computer.

My two sentences quickly become ten, then fifteen, then twenty, then thirty and I’m on a roll. Before I know it, I’m working my way down my third page and the playing still hasn’t stopped. To anyone else this is probably the most annoying thing to hear, because who in their right mind would be playing the piano for, I glance at my clock, an hour and fifteen minutes straight? And I definitely don’t have an answer. At least not right now. But I’m gonna find one. I close my laptop and shove my feet in the shoes I had taken out of my closet earlier. I don’t close my door completely when I step out of my room, knowing that I’ll go back in just as soon as I find the source of the notes. They get louder as I make my way down the hallway. I stop in front of the door where I’m 99.9% sure the music is coming from. Room 1327.

Cautiously, I press my ear against the door and am once again met with the aggressive taps on the keyboard. I take in a deep breath and nod before heading quickly back to my room. I grab a stack of sticky notes from my desk and a sharpie. I scribble out a few words and then rush back out to the room. Half of me says not to do this. To leave it alone. But the other half of me says that whoever lives behind that door needs to be told that they play beautifully. Which is exactly what the note you stick on their door says. Just three simple words and a smiley face.

‘You play beautifully. :)’

And with that I go back to your room to grab my bag and keys, now in desperate need of that caffeine I was craving only an hour ago. I lock the door behind me and head to the main exit, opposite of what is going to easily become my favorite room, if they continue to play like they are now. I open the door to the closing notes of “The Scientist.”

When I come back, much later than I anticipated (but I guess that’s what happens when you go to the only open Starbucks on campus at eight at night, with an abundance of due dates fast approaching.) my eyes are threatening to close on me - despite the two extra espresso shots I added to my order. I don’t notice it until I’m at my door, key in the lock, that the music hasn’t stopped. And being the oh-so nosy person I am, I make my way down to the magical room 1327 and notice my note is missing. I smile softly and I hope - selfishly - that they play just long enough for me to fall asleep.

I trudge back into my room and the first thing I notice is all the lights are on, which means my roommate, Tara, is back. She’s not a huge fan of the dark when alone, always keeping at least two of the lights on when I’m not in the room. She’s laying on her side, with her phone in her hand and her earphones in. I move farther into the room, turning off the bathroom light on my way to my desk. I set my bag on my chair and toss my keys on the smooth, although kinda crowded, desktop. She sits up, pulling her earphones out. “Hey.”

“Hey, sorry I’m back so late. Starbucks was packed. And then I ran into one of my friends and we got a bite to eat.”

“It’s okay. Do you hear that?” She asks quickly.

“Hear what?”

“The piano. Do you hear it?”

“Oh that? Yeah, they were playing before I left.”

“Yeah, well they’ve been playing for almost two hours now. Nonstop. It’s driving me crazy.”

I shrug and reach for a fresh pair of pajamas, “I don’t know. I think it sounds nice. I’m gonna go shower.”

I don’t hear the music in the bathroom, but that’s definitely because I’m playing my own, needing something that could wake me up just enough for me to get through my shower without passing out from complete exhaustion. I’m disappointed to find that the notes are no longer filling the room when I get out of the bathroom. It’s strange, but I already kinda miss them.

---

Mystery piano person continues to play for the next week, sometimes repeating songs from the day before, but mostly playing new ones. I wonder if they knew these all previously or if they’re just learning as they go. Sometimes it’s hard to tell, but that could just depend on the difficulty of the song, I guess. I tug on the sleeves of my jacket, pulling it off my shoulders before going to my desk to write another note for the piano person.

‘Still beautiful. But aren’t you scared your fingers will fall off with all that tapping? Lol :)’

I leave the room to put the note on their door when I notice one already there. I scrunch up my face. The one I left yesterday was already gone by the time I got back to the dorm last night, and it was written on an obnoxiously bright pink sticky note. This one, however, is blue. I don’t want to be nosy, but I can’t help but read it when I go to place mine.

‘Thanks for the notes. Glad you like it. Have a favorite so far?’

I stare at the writing for a while, it’s scribbly, and small (half of the sticky note is left untouched), but legible enough. It’s Part of me thinks I shouldn’t reply. Because if it’s not for me then that would be totally awkward. But if it is, it would be rude not to answer, right? I scurry back to my room to get a pen. I’ll answer, I decide. There’s no reason not to.

‘Yellow - Coldplay’

The music stops on the other side and I quickly run back to my room, not wanting to get caught. Because sure this isn’t wrong or anything, but some part of it feels… intrusive. I hear the door opening just as I’m shutting mine and I so desperately want to peek out and see who mystery piano person is, but that would give me away as well. And even though we live on the same floor, I’ve hardly met anyone that wasn’t Tara and a few girls that lived down the hall, and I’m not quite ready for that yet.

---

It goes on like this for another two weeks, passing notes back and forth. Him asking for feedback - I usually have none. He thinks I’m lying, says there’s always room for improvement. I tell him that since I don’t have a background in music, I have no room to judge. He asks if he can teach me. I tell him maybe someday.

‘Okay Yellow, we’ve been at this for weeks. You gonna tell me your name yet?’

I smile at the nickname.

‘Not today, piano man. Soon.’

‘Fine. But you know my room number. Can I have that at least?’

I think it over. It seems only fair that he knows that.

‘1320.’

The note is not on his door the next day. It’s on mine. But I don’t respond to this one. I don’t have time.

And when I get back to my room later in the evening, the note was still there, untouched, unanswered. And even though I wanted to, I didn’t have the energy to respond. I was spent. It was one of the rougher days. One thing just piling on top of the other until it’s like that one chair that has all your clothes on it that’s not necessarily dirty, but you wore it for a few hours so it’s not clean enough to hang back up. You know the chair that becomes the biggest fucking inconvenience when you need to work at your desk so you have to throw all the clothes on your bed only to throw it back on the chair when you want to lay down.

Yeah, my day was pretty much that chair. I woke up late thanks to my alarm that just didn’t go off? So I was running really late, and I had to sprint to my first class, and I was still late. Then when I went to get coffee, the line was long, and when I finally got my drink I had a total of two sips before someone bumped into me and I dropped the cup on the ground outside the building of my next class. Then there was a pop quiz in said class that I’m quite sure I failed because I don’t think our professor had even covered half of what was on that test. Then my phone died and in my rush to get to class, I left my charger in the dorm. And the cherry on top of this already melting sundae, I locked myself out of my room. I swore I had it when I was leaving, but as I retrace my steps, I remember leaving it right there on the bathroom counter. And it’s just my luck that Tara won’t be back until after midnight tonight because she’s closing at work. I let out a loud groan and take a seat across from my door, legs crossed in front of me.

I know I should work on my homework that’s due at the end of the week (in literally just two days, actually) but my computer is on the verge of dying too, so there’s no point. I pull out the book I’ve had stuffed in my bag for days, in hopes of finding some time to read it. I guess with nothing to do for the next four and a half hours, I could read.

I don’t know how long I’ve been sitting there, but I notice about ninety pages in that the familiar sound of piano man is not filling my ears.

“Locked out?” Someone says, the first one that I’ve seen come down the hallway since I’ve been here actually. I knew this floor was pretty dead, but I didn’t ever notice that it was this dead.

I chuckle bitterly, “Yeah. Just a little bit.”

“Is your roommate on their way?”

I shake my head, “No, she won’t be back until late.”

“Did you call the RA on duty?”

I hold up my phone which rested beside me - habit, I guess, to take it out of my back pocket in case I get notifications, “Phone’s dead.”

“You can use mine, if you’d like.”

I shake my head, “No, it’s okay. Thank you.”

“Well, it’s cold out here. Why don’t you come to my room? You can charge your phone and get off this dusty floor that I don’t think has been cleaned since we got back from break,” he says light-heartedly.

I can’t help but laugh, “You have a point there. Okay… sure. But I have to ask you something first.”

“Shoot,” he holds his hand out to help me off the ground.

“What’s your name?”

He looks down with an embarrassed smile on his face. “I’m Connor. And you are…?”

“Y/n.”

“Well, y/n. It’s nice to meet you. Uh, my room’s this way.” He takes the lead and I sling my bag over my shoulder. I think my heart stops when we get to his room. Room 1327. Fuck.

He frowns for a second, looking from his door to mine just once before opening the door. “After you,” he pushes the door open and I smile sheepishly before entering. Sure enough, there’s a keyboard against the far wall, where the window overlooks campus. The odd number rooms definitely got the better views. I stand awkwardly near the wall, allowing him to walk through and set his stuff down.

“You can sit down. Let me just, move some of this stuff real quick,” he takes his towel off his desk chair and takes his shoes from under the desk, throwing them carelessly to the corner. “Sorry, it’s a little bit messy. It’s laundry day tomorrow, so there’s shit everywhere. Please, sit.” He gestures to the chair and I do, setting my bag down next to me, leaning against one of the legs of the desk. “Do you want something to drink? I have water and… no that’s about it. I need to go grocery shopping, too.” He laughs.

“Thanks, Connor. But I’m fine.”

“Okay,” he nods, sitting down at the stool in front of the keyboard. “Oh! Charger,” he stands up and goes over to his nightstand. “May I?” he holds his hand out and I nod, handing him my phone from my back pocket. “Sorry, I’d plug it in over there, but that outlet is fucked. Hasn’t worked since I moved in here.”

“No, it’s fine, really.”

Slowly he makes his way back to the keyboard, facing me, away from the setting sun. I spare a glance behind him and notice the bright pink sticky notes that rest on the wall beside the window. They’re my notes, every single one of them. I clear my throat. “Um, I’m assuming you’re the one who’s been playing the past few weeks.”

He cringes, “Yeah, sorry about that. It’s just how I’ve been destressing recently. It’s probably been getting on everyone’s nerves.”

“Not everyone’s… you play beautifully.”

He doesn’t say anything for a second, and then clears his throat, looking down at his feet. “Uh, thanks.”

“How long have you been playing?”

“It’s actually a pretty recent hobby. My friend started teaching me like last March, I think. And then I started watching a lot of videos on YouTube and I got pretty good at it, I guess. I mean, I won’t be selling out any arenas or anything like that.”

I laugh softly, “Well, I would definitely buy a ticket.”

I swear I see his cheeks tint pink, “Do you play?” He asks, avoiding the compliment.

“No,” I shake my head. “I’ve always wanted to learn, but I’m pretty sure I don’t have a musical bone in my body.”

“I don’t think that’s true.”

“Oh it is. I uh, I auditioned for my school musical in like fifth grade. I don’t think I’ve ever seen someone cover their ears so quickly.” I laugh and his eyes crinkle at the sides as he tries his hardest not to. “It was definitely not one of my shining moments. Yeah, I told myself that day not to even think about starting a career in music.”

“Were you singing?”

I nod.

“Okay, well singing isn’t playing. And if you ask me, the notes, the chords, that’s what makes the music, not the words. Although those are important too.”

“Can you sing?”

“My shower head hasn’t told me to stop yet.” he jokes. And when I laugh, genuinely this time, he just watches me for a minute. “So you like yellow,” he says, turning to face the keyboard.

“I’m sorry?”

“The song. You said it was your favorite one that I’ve played.”

I sigh, “What gave me away?”

“‘You play beautifully.’”

“Well, it’s true. However, my preference did change since you last asked me. And don’t think I haven’t noticed that you now play yellow at least twice every day.”

He’s really blushing now. “Gotta keep the audience happy.” His fingers press gently over the keys not settling on a melody yet. “What’s your new favorite then?”

“You played ‘happier’’ the other day. I’ve never heard it on piano like that. I really liked it.”

He nods and starts playing the opening notes to it. “Now, I told you I wasn’t a singer,” he looks back at me, “but I’ll try it just for my biggest fan.”

I roll my eyes, “Oh shut up.”

“‘When the morning comes and we see what we’ve become, in the cold light oh na na na na na na na na…’ definitely don’t know those words.” He smiles and I think my heart melts at the sight. “‘Every argument, every word we can’t take back. Cause with all that has happened, I think that we both know the way that this story ends.’”

He continues through the song, but doesn’t continue singing after the first chorus. I’m sitting here, watching his fingers dance across the keys like they were made for it. He moves his body with each note and I am absolutely mesmerized. I know I’ve always loved piano, but watching him do this makes me love it even more.

“God, you’re perfect.” I mutter when he’s done and immediately cover my mouth because holy fuck, I said that out loud.

“Well, I wouldn’t say perfect.” He turns back to face me. “You’d have to get to know me more before you could make that assumption. And I can guarantee that you will not feel the same way after.”

I shake my head, covering my face with my hands. “I’m sorry. I really did not mean to say that out loud.”

“It’s cool,” he waves it off. “Although, I wasn’t kidding about getting to know me. Because I’d love to get to know you.”

I clear my throat, removing my hands from my face. “Well, I’m free right now,” I say, crossing one leg over the other, this newfound confidence foreign to me.

“Can I take you to dinner? Or to get coffee, if you’ve already eaten.”

“Right now?”

“Why not? You said you’re free, right?”

I nod, “Yeah. Yeah.”

“Okay, then it’s a date.”

“A date?” I question with a raised eyebrow.

“First dates are usually meant to get to know each other, aren’t they? And hopefully this isn’t too forward. But I think I have an idea for our second one too.”

“Oh you do? Well someone’s optimistic.”

“Only when it counts. So, may I?”

“May you what?”

“May I, Connor,” he stands from his seat and holds his hand out to me, “take you, y/n, on a date? Right now?”

I bite the inside of my cheek, “Yeah,” I finally say, placing my hand in his, “Yes, you may.” He pulls me to my feet and we’re so close. He smells nice, clean, with just the slightest hint of cologne that I can’t quite place. But I know it’s easily becoming my favorite scent already.

***

I hope you enjoyed reading!! Like, reblog and leave feedback!! Permanent tag: @soyalimoncada-blog @tinycertain @magcon7280 @daisyangei @devilmendes @babybrash @fallinallincurls @lovewithanattitude @sinceweremutual @myyohmyuohmyy @perfectly-mendess @enchantingbrowneyedgirl @baroness-alison @lostinmendess @linanilssonfurberg @luvluvxx @mariamuses @shawnieeboyy @divinginfearlessly @mendesficsxbombay @shawnsthighs @shawns-badreputation

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104 notes · View notes

blissfulparker · 5 years

Text

What’s mine is yours→college!peter

Summary→ you and peter share just about everything. Nothing goes untouched by the other. But what if you start getting a little deeper with your stealing?

Parings→ college!peter Parker x college!reader

Warnings→ fluff

A/n→ this is for @thollandss writing challenge! Hope you enjoy.💖

At first it was hoodies, cold New York nights that had you wrapped up in some of your favorites sweatshirts from peter. To his old midtown one from high school to the one he got in Italy when he went to Europe. He didn’t mind, no, in-fact he loved seeing you bundled up in them. When he’d hug you goodbye you’d smell just like him and you liked that too. Peter always leaving a mark on you somehow.

Then it was tee shirts or his flannels. These were on fall mornings when you needed something quick to throw on before class when you spent the night in peters dorm. His shirts would be big on your or stretched out from how long he’s had them. His flannels would be snug on you. They’d be long at the torso but short at the arms. You loved the wear them buttoned up as a sleep shirt or tucked half in as a outfit.

Peter couldn’t blame you because he sometimes did the same to you. Stole your hair ties just to wear on his wrist so every time he looked down he’d be reminded of you. His favorite was the red velvet one because it reminded him of Spider-Man.

Sometimes he’d take one of your shirts, not to wear—well, maybe it depends on the size and what it was—just to cuddle with when you’d be gone at night. You thought it was adorable and let him take as many shirts as he needed.

People thought you guys were So tooth rotting that sometimes they couldn’t stand to be around you. Seeing peter with your scrunches, you with his hoodie, even matching necklaces. Playing with each other’s hands and falling more and more in love every single day.

But right now peter was running late. To meet you of course. He just came back from patrol and was already 20 minuets late to your study date at the coffee shop.

2:18pm

Hey! I ordered you coffee but it got kinda cold so I just drank it. Where are you?

I’ll order you another when you get here but will you be here? Haha love you!

2:34pm

Pete, I already finished two problems for our chem class, you have to do 15 and 16 it’s only fair

2:36pm

Are you on patrol? Sorry for blowing up your phone I’m just worried I haven’t heard from you.❤️

We’re all the texts from you while peter was busy swinging around the city. He frantically searched for a pair of clean socks but they were all dirty. He swore he had a pair of Nike ones that were clean but he couldn’t find them for the life of him.

“Ned! Did you borrow my socks?” Peter called out as he searched the drawer. He groaned as he was pretty much out of luck at this point and was going to be even later than he already was.

“No, you have small feet peter.” Ned called from his video game and peter grunted as he resulted to spraying dirty ones with febreeze and slipping on some shoes.

“I had a pair of clean ones and now their gone. Whatever I’ll just do my laundry tonight.” Peter comes out with his back pack and picks up some of his books for the classes.

“Mmh, can’t do that. Someone already is using three washers and the other one is out of order.” Ned smashed buttons and peter threw his head back and groaned. He’ll just go down to the laundry mat, he desperately needed clean clothes.

“Whatever, see you in an hour or something.” Peter waves and ned finally pauses.

“You mean whenever you’re done smooching up with (y/n)?” Ned tells him and peter blushes.

“Shut up!” He taps his books. “Besides were not even at her dorm so we won’t be doing any of that.” Peter tells him with his head high before he opens the door. “Seriously though who’s using three washers?” Peter shakes his head as he closes the door and makes his way downstairs.

I’m on my way now! Sorry I’m so late couldn’t find any socks! I swore I had a pair of nike ones but I guess I must’ve lost them in the laundry room.🤷‍♀️ see you soon!

Your phone buzzes with a text from peter. You’re slightly annoyed he’s so late when you should be use to his lateness. You knew what you signed up for but when he doesn’t check up on you that’s when you start to worry.

You look down at your feet and see that it was you for the reason he’s late. You had his Nike socks on that matched perfect with a pair of mom jeans and one of your new sweaters that peter already adored. You move your pants leg down farther so that when he walks in he can’t see you stole his socks.

It was an accident anyways. Normally you’d hate sleeping with socks on but one night peters doom was particularly freezing cold. His portable heater was broken and his sheets were too thin. Peter had no problem but you needed so badly to be warm.

Once he fell asleep you slipped out and found a pair of Socks. Not your usual soft fluffy ones from target or Forever 21 But they would do. They were the only pair of clean ones peter had and as much as you loved your boyfriend, there’s no way you’re using dirty socks.

You thought that you’d just take them home and wash them. Which you did, but you were wearing them again because it looked cute and you thought of him. To be fair, you’re scrunchies we’re running low all do to peter wearing them as bracelets.

Peter walked in gripping his backpack and pushing his hair back as he joined the line to order a coffee. Medium caramel latte with 3 shots of espresso. That’s what he always ordered, if he could to more than three shots he would but they cut peter off at three saying more could kill him. It didn’t matter though, 3 shots was nothing Because of the effects of the spider bite. For caffeine to run though peters body he needed at least nine shots for something to happen.

“Hey!” He comes and presses a kiss on your temple as he takes a seat next to you at the table.

“Hi!” You reach up for his lips and he gladly accepts the kiss.

“Sorry I was so late, I was on patrol and lost track of time. Some kids got their baseball stuck up in a tree so I got it down for them and some old woman couldn’t find her car and then the next thing you know I was late. I also can’t seem to find my socks anymore. I dunno I think I’m loosing my mind.” He takes a sip of the warm beverage before setting it down and taking out his stuff.

“Weird.” You nod and scoot your feet even farther under the chair so he can’t see them. “Anyways, I needed help with problems 1-4 for math and want you to proof read my essay for creative writing if that’s okay with you?” You ask and he nods.

“You’re an amazing writer there’s really no reason for me to proof read but I always love being the first one to read your works.” He smiles and you feel a blush creep up.

Peter moves his books and suddenly his highlighter falls in between your two chairs. You panic, not exactly thinking he’d get mad at you but just think he’d find it a bit weird.

“I’ve got it.” You reach down but peter was already one arm down and grabbing the pink highlighter.

“Hey,” he stopped and then came back up quickly. “Aren’t those my—“ You cover your face with your hands and push back your hair.

“I’m sorry, I know I know it’s weird but your dorm is so cold pete, so cold. One night when your portable heater broke and I was already bundled up and you were fast asleep I couldn’t sleep because my feet were just freezing. I thought I had some of my fuzzy socks from the winter in your drawer but I didn’t so I saw these and put them on and they helped. I was gonna take them home and wash them which I did but I was gonna keep a little longer because I liked they way They matched my fit.” You confess and peter stares at you in awe. His lips parted and his eyes have a twinkle but soon his lips turn into a playful grin.

“oh, you’ve started stealing my socks now?” He grins and you grunt as you find your face back in your hands from embarrassment.

“I know, I know, it’s weird. I’ll give them back tonight when I do my laundry.” You tell him and he scoots his chair closer and moves your hands.

“You’re so adorable.” He says with a smile and you have the hardest time making eye contact with how embarrassed you are. “I don’t care, I think it’s cute.” He kisses your cheek and waits for you to look at him.

“I think it’s embarrassing.” You mumble, not serious. just that you stole your boyfriends socks when most girls just take their boyfriends jackets and maybe a shirt. You just take everything from peter.

“No, what people think is embarrassing is a boy who doesn’t have long hair wear a big fluffy velvet scrunchie on his wrist everyday. The ones from forever 21 or H&M. Has no long hair at all but wears them on his wrist because it smells like their girlfriends hair and the imagines her putting her hair up in one.” He tilts your head up and you smile because you know he does that.

Red, blue, black, teal blue, maroon, baby pink, plaid, the one with little flowers on it. He had them all in a collection in his drawer. You had plenty more and when you tried to get new ones peter just gave you the old ones to wear some more before he stole them back.

“Do you still want your socks back?” You ask and he taps his highlight and looks down at the problem.

“Do you have more than one pair?” He asks and you shake your head ‘no’ but then the hair on his arm goes up and you sigh.

“Yes, okay fine I have the Harry Potter ones too.” You pout and he jerks his head up. He’s been wondering why those come and go. He never made the connection.

“My hufflepuff ones?” He asks and you shake your head.

“No, you lost those over a month ago, that wasn’t my fault. I take the ones with the little hedwig all over. I’ll buy you some more I promise.” You tell him and he just pulls you into his chest.

“No need for that, I guess since we’re confessing things...I took your queen tee shirt about a month ago. I told you that you lost it but sometimes I use it as a pillowcase when you can’t sleepover.” He admits and you giggle, you knew that. Peter was really, really bad at playing dumb. Also you found it under his disgusting bed when you were looking for the condoms he hid from everyone who walked in.

“Yeah, I know that pete.” You smile and kiss him on the jaw.

“You do?” He tilts his head and you nod and adjust yourself back in your seat.

“Yeah, found it under your bed.” You shrug and it’s now peter who is red. “Can we work now and worry about where are clothes are later?” You want to change the subject before you admit to taking anything else of his—his Spider-Man mask he thought he lost.

“Yeah sure, which ones are we on again?” He asks and you point and he starts to get to work before he stops to take s sip of coffee and looks at you.

“Wait, have you seen my Spider-Man mask then?”

Let’s talk about this and tell me how you feel!

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#peter parker imagine #peter parker x reader #college!peter #peter parker fluff #peter parker fic #peter parker fanfic #peter parker x y/n #peter parker au #peter parker angst #peter parker x you #peter parker ffh #tom holland imagine #tom holland x reader

747 notes · View notes

the-mic-drop · 4 years

Audio

Shonen Jump Rap Cypher by Rustage

Lyrics below the cut

If anyone wants to break down some lines that you think not everyone will get, please feel free!

Monkey D. Luffy- One Piece (Performed by Rustage)

Starting with the number one, hey

How’d a pirate get this long, hey

‘Cause I eat the gum-gum, see them run run

when I hit that gun, hey

Sailin’ I’m taking no breaks when my crew’s on the move as we pillage the grand line

Looting the treasure we can find

I’m blowing up like a landmine

Going gear second, I reckon that I’m a weapon

I’m wrecking up those who threaten in messing with my own brethren

Stay reppin’ look where I’m headin’

No question the Yonkos sweatin’

I’m bettin’ in words I’m yellin’

I’m the king and there’s no forgettin’, UH

Gon Freecss- Hunter x Hunter (Performed by Fabvl)

I’ll jump the competition, really there’s no contest

Channeled future Nen and most of y’all ain’t even bomb yet

It’s nonsense

Pro exams completed as a child

Hisoka, I think these clowns are living in denial

So don’t make me power up, I’ll call the thunder at my right hand

If you want the strongest Shonen, then you called the right man

They might stan

Treat you all like Pitou, it won’t take long

Name is Gon and this time, I’mma make sure that you stay gone

Naruto Uzumaki- Naruto (Performed by None Like Joshua)

Oh, better believe it’s Naruto

Who’s the best hero? All of you know

My legacy is happening, I got a type of running named after me

while you’re slow

Can’t keep up with my chakra flow

Except Hinata, I’m her Ho

Kage

All I did was call her and I told her to come over ‘cause my parents are not home

Out of these ninjas, you can watch my dub

Even all my filler is so far above

When it comes to Boruto, why y’all givin’ up

like I did with simpin’ on Sakura?

Killer B’s rapping, but I get the encore

With the power that I bring, I don’t really want yours

‘Cause I came from the swing, everybody shunned more

Now you’re looking at the king of this Jump Force

Yami Yugi- Yu-Gi-Oh! (Performed by Connor Quest!)

I’mma master, you be

practice newbies

That’s a doozy

for Yami Yugi

Puzzle did something like a hadron tunnel

‘cause now I got Atem through me

Champ of the match see fans fawn, no matter what hand’s drawn

I’m kicking up dust, metal tanks in land form

When we d-d-d-d-duel there’s sandstorms

Cards are flippin’ I need an answer quick

and I might find my Dark Magician

If I wish, and believe hard enough in the heart that’s in ‘em

(Heart of the cards)

I see Seto’s fear

Pull the fifth part of Exodia

Guess it’s all came to a head, so clear

that your deck’s gonna get X’d, oh dear!

Asta- Black Clover (Performed by Eddie Rath)

Welcome to the magic

It’s a tale that’s tragic

Filled with a pain that’s harder than plastic

especially when you discover you don’t have it

When I started I was less than amazing

But now that I’ve been chosen by the Grimoir, I’m rising to the occasion in a blazing flame of

Magic

Ain’t no Hocus Pocus and Abracadabra

Not a wizard you joke with

This is not Gandalf the Grey, but you shall not pass hopeless

Better be ferocious

Was the poorest orphan living in darkness

but now that I’m focused, I be thanking all my hardships

Ichigo Kurosaki- Bleach (Performed by IBDL)

Uh, hittin’ back with that Bankai

Got that power like I came out of the Dangai

Pops passed the torch; now I’m the fam’s Don guy

Think you Aizen, but you lookin’ like that Don guy

Y’all like Soifon, your raps barely sting

My bars are Getsuga Tensho, got that masterful swing

They say, it ain’t over til the fat lady sings

But you’ll know it’s really over when that black lady sings

Koro-sensei- Assassination Classrom (Performed by CDawgVA)

Mach speed

Blow up the moon and now I’m making these children write essays

Comin with tentacles teach you a lesson in why you don’t mess with the sensei

I amaze

Used to be the Reaper, now I run this class

I can turn a loser to assassin, do it real fast

Light Yagami- Death Note (Performed by Zach Boucher)

I think I’ve been out of my head

Gift was given, made some poor decisions, that I wish I didn’t, but I’d do it again

Feeling different, I was on a mission to achieve my vision with a page and a pen

Sit and listen to the words I’ve written

I ain’t even finished ‘til I see that they’re dead

Don’t even try to pretend

There’s no malicious intent

Stay in my thoughts, stick to the morals I’ve got,

and kill everyone who is not

Just never get caught, ‘til every criminal rots

They’ll consider me as a god

At whatever cost, that’s how I excel

Cannot be stopped, even if I fell

I’m taking them off if you couldn’t tell

I gave up a lot to give you this L

Shoyo Hinata- Haikyuu!! (Performed by Shwabadi)

Yah, here comes Hinata

When I’m on the court the enemy has got their guard up

Never gonna fall off, bet I’m gonna pop off

Way short, but I’m packing punches like a sawnoff

Hot like a sauna, this ball of fire don’t know nada

but I’m gonna chase desire to go farther

every jump will take me higher

They put walls up, so I had to learn to fly

Putting up points, spiking it, or clearing the way

Best decoy, got a little something to say

to anyone that doubts that I’m here to stay

Only got one goal, that’s to play the game

Underestimated, I’m the ace, you just wait

when I spike it past the net, you might take it to the face

Izuku “Deku” Midoriya- My Hero Academia (Performed by Divide Music)

Coming in with 100% of me

I got you all trembling

Oh just with a flick of a finger

put you back where you’re supposed to be

I’m not, holding back

I got you so calculated. I’m

one step ahead, One for All gon’ be demonstrated

Get it? Got it? Good.

Nothing better and you should know

Started at the bottom

but I made it to the top so

Step aside, I’m climbing to great heights

with All-Might by my side

Reppin’ U.A. with pride, oh

Yusuke Urameshi- Yu Yu Hakusho (Performed by GameBoyJones)

Giving you the finger, Spirit Gun

Send you off with Botan, then you done

Hit you with the stick, and I didn’t need a grip when I’m pulling from the hip, then click!

Because I’m, locked loaded, the clip is ready to go

Got a, shotgun in my hand that’s ‘bout to blow

Cause I’m hittin’ you quick fast

givin’ you whiplash

wearing these Spirit Cuffs

You could be human or demon, cause honestly, I just don’t give a fuck

If you’re looking for the best, just know there’s no other

‘cause I’m flexing out here like I’m the youngest Toguro brother

Gintoki Sakata- Gintama (Perfomed by Shao Dao)

They call me, Gintoki, slim not stocky

Lemme Shonen Jump on your leg and your body

Odd Job Gin, don’t mess with my possee

If you touch my hair, then you will be sorry

Ne, boge (Hey, bloke)

Nanikore, uruseena (what is this? Not good.)

Cause you’re way too sloppy

Got a silver soul, Shiroyasha

Swing my sword and Amanto scatter

Gintama, not Kintama

Tell Shinpachi we need money

If Kagura or Katsura bring more trouble, we keep running

Pay rent? That’s a waste of time

That weather girl, I will make her mine

You can beat me up and that’s fair and fine

But if you hurt my friends, then prepare to die

Tanjiro Kamado- Demon Slayer (Performed by DizzyEight)

Look, slayin’ demons that’s what we do

If you filled with evil, then my blade is highly lethal

If you comin’ at my people, pray to god I never meet you

Ever mess with Nez, you KO’d when I see you

I’ve grown stronger from that fateful day they found me

I trained hard to hone the skill, the progression so astounding

My style like breathing water, that mean you can never drown me

Whirlpool, that mean I’m slicin’ everything around me

Emma- The Promised Neverland (Performed by FrivolousShara)

E-M-M-A 63194

Listen to what I’ve gotta say

The others walked, seems now we’ve gotta run away

Don’t you talk, adults are the enemy

You can break every bone in my body, I won’t falter

and if the plan fails, the idea simply alters

Ah, these demons scheming, but they ain’t the only monsters

Our combined IQ breaks the safe, strength in numbers

Now we’ve woken from the slumber

Never ending perfect Summers

Across the farm, you can’t help but wonder

Soma Yukihira- Food Wars! (Performed by DiggzDaProphecy)

See I’m the anime Raekwon

The chef baby, stay calm

You can’t stand the heat

Stay out the kitchen, get a day job

Word, and the finale’s superb

I take a sec, put on my band, an’ I’ll be happy to serve, uh

So ma, tell me what you like and I can hook it up

Ya boy’s got them recipes the best couldn’t cook it up

And she gon’ bust from the taste of my meat

Chef, boy are these boys always cookin’ up heat

Jotaro Kujo- Jojo’s Bizarre Adventure (Performed by Dreaded Yasuke)

It’s my go, they call me Jotaro

Don’t get me mad, I’mma go fat only with jabs you go through silos

Got that drip from Cairo, girls will simp my silhouette

I know think it’s a typo fighting with a platinum psycho

None of y’all is a threat

What you gotta say in your breath

Better speak with a bigger chest

Now you lyin’ down with my pet,

while Iggy piss on your neck

All types of disrespect, what you expect?

Go against a vet, better get your techs

wanna get swept through the complex,

now who is next?

Bobobo- Bobobo-bo Bo-bobo (Performed by BassedOlaf w/ ThighHighSenpai)

Bobobo making the foes stare

Call me the master of nose hair

Look at the hair on the heads of these anime characters,

brother, it’s no fair

But I’m better than these guys, don’t you understand?

I came second place at screaming face-to-face with desk fans

Afro is full of surprises, look at my power’s immense

Leaving beauty screaming-

(Bobobo, that makes no sense!)

Hunting hair hunters, Saitama, I’m coming for you

Don Patch a better Super Saiyan God than Goku

Son Goku- Dragon Ball (Performed by DaddyPhatSnaps)

Oh they went and called Kakarot

had to be danger

Leave em flat-footed like they in the gravity chamber

I’m just looking for a challenge, can you battle me stranger?

Shonen legend in the saddle and the power is major

Level up on the track, flow Ultra Instinct

Bye bye bye fusion dance is always in sync

Wink

And they wonder why I’m last on the song

‘Cause when all of y’all were talking

I just formed a Spirit Bomb

14 notes · View notes

callmeasyouwantidk · 3 years

Note

3, 6, 12, and 21 for the Writer Asks, please! 🤗 💜

Thank you for the ask Hiro!

——————————————————————

3. What is your favorite/least favorite part about writing?

My favorite is the feeling you get when you have finished writing so you reread it to make sure everything is correct.

My least favorite is writers block. AHHHGHHHHGHGGGGGGGG

——————————————————————

6. Favorite character you've written?

I never wrote originals yet (even tho I'm thinking on it) so my fav is Butsuma with completely different attitude in my mid-century AU. I made him like, as strong, as serious, but now he takes everything close to heart and just had to go with it because a good king can't allow himself to be a crybaby in the war. He was suffering and I loved to reread about it. Usual writer stuff, nothing new)

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12. Which story of yours do you like best? Why?

Honestly I'm not sure here. There are like three stories that r good enough to be my favs. I can't decide... Ugh. Whatever. Basic review of them 😅: First story is basically about Tobirama getting kidnapped when he is a child (like, 6 months or so) by Tajima. That happened while Butsuma was at his mission and Tobi's mom was about to give birth to Itama so Hashirama and Tobi were with their nany. But what can a regular human nany do when at the window she sees the head of the Uchiha clan? Only try to get the children to safety or get help. Unfortunately, Tajima got his hands on one of the boys before nany could. Now Tobirama grows up among the Uchiha as one of them, with only one goal - to kill his father, brothers, mother, and his own clansman. He succeeded at killing two of his brothers at young age, and killing his mother while a teen. Tajima gets physical pleasure when he sees Butsuma clutch his teeth in anger and dispare every fight Tobi includes. Not gonna go farther, too long, but you got the spirit.

-------------------------------------------------

Second story is about Hashirama getting caught prisoner while Tajima is still ruling the clan. He learns that he was caught when he used himself as a shield to save Tobirama from a wicked two way attack that would have killed him. He also learns that even tho he did save him, the poisoned blade did a little cut, so Tobi will die from it in few days. Gotta get out. While trying to find his way out, Hashi stumbles upon his father and father's good friend who went missing four years ago, who's also held prisoners. Same story - too long to tell, but you got the spirit.

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3rd story has two versions. This is Ver 1. It's the AU I'm currently working on. Mid-century AU, where people have wings (type and colour of wing depends on personality, hair colour, and mobility of the person. Also it might depend on the wings your ancestors had.) and magic. Butsuma is the king, Tajima is the king. Senju kingdom grew weaker lately, because many of their blacksmiths have been slaughtered in one of the attacks on kingdom, and the army needs weapons. Because now the knights gotta run around the field looking for a weapon in case they don't have their anymore, they grow more and more tired after every fight. The Knights of the Round Table (which includes Butsuma and his knights) decided that the kingdom is growing too weak, and judging from Uchihas actions, they realize it too and don't hesitate to use the opportunity. They have decided that if the Uchiha kingdom does one strong enough strike with all their power, it might even be the end of it. To prevent this happening Butsuma calls Tajima for negotiation. He says that both armies are tired and that it might be good to take a break and form temporary peace, let the armies rest for a while, heal up, and continue. Tajima, of course knew where it was coming from, and it was far from the deal he was willing to make, so he asked for a payment. He said that he will consider such deal, if Butsuma gives him one certain payment to stay away. The payment is Butsuma himself. Tajima asked Butsuma to give himself in as a prisoner. A slave. Only in such case will Tajima agree. Having no other choice Butsuma agrees, signs the contract, and gives himself in, leaving a wife and his four children. While being an Uchiha slave he is treated even worse then a homeless alcoholic. Leaving in a cell in dungeons. In summer/autumn and spring working on the fields, and in winter helping as a servant. For every little mistake he was punished with a certain amount of whip blows that would leave him a bloody mess, and a lot of deep bruises. He was given only the things that he need not to die to quickly. In cold winters he had to swallow his pride and beg for something warm. The only way to get a little food for him was to pleasure Tajima in a naughty way (if you know what I mean ͡° ͜ʖ ͡°). His status here was lower then a dog's, so anyone and everyone could do whatever they wanted with him. He had to do every request regardless of anything. Because of constant physical and emotional stress of more or less regular punishments and the inability to say "no" to all the perverted guards around the castle he aged greatly in a not so long amount of time, even tho he also did a lot of work to adapt. Madara was helping him tho, as much and as well as he could. He would call him in for said "naughty time" but would let him just sit and rest for an hour after which let him go. He would bring him a little of bread if Butsuma didn't eat for more then 3 days. He would help him get treatment if Butsuma got ill. Ten years later, when Madara grew to be 24 he made an assassination on his father because didn't agree with his perverted way of spreading tyranny not only on Butsuma, but through the kingdom itself. He became the king, and let Butsuma back to his family, shortly after which they made a permanent peace treaty.

Ver2. All the same but instead of asking for Butsuma to turn himself in, Tajima asked for one of his children. Through days of thinking of a way to get out of the situation, and Tobirama saying his word, Butsuma sends Tobi to Tajima as a prisoner. For Tobi it's all the same story but only that people get their wings only when they turn 18, and in the Uchiha castle it is forbidden for anyone to use wings except the royal family. Tobi had to learn to control his wings while always being at risk of them opening randomly and getting him in a lot of trouble. Bit again, Madara helped him with that.

Very 2 has a different ending tho. At some point when Tobi is around 22 the Uchiha kingdom suffers an attack from a big enemy coming for Tajima. During that attack, Tajima dies, but so does Tobirama. Tobi goes to the other world, but instead of resting in peace he spends a his time looking over his family and kingdom. With years passing, he becomes the Guardian of the Senju kingdom, and he looks over it and all the people living in until the end of times.

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21. What aspect of your writing are you most proud of?

Um... I guess that I make kinda very dramatic content, and a lot of people actually like drama but usually are ashamed (for whatever reason) to say about it so there are not much actual dramatic fanfics.

——————————————————————

Hope you had good time reading my 3 page essay answering these. I really couldn't decide on the story could I?😅

3 notes · View notes

theforgottendaydreamer · 3 years

Note

Hey! It’s me the anon again! I totally get what you are saying but from the opposite of the spectrum where memorization feel is impossible but my adhd(I also probably have asd I am working with a therapist to try to find a place to do an evaluation at the moment) allows for me to make an insane amount of connections. So like I get it but from the opposite end? It’s still tricky but I am better at analyzing things then memorizing them. Like when I took art history I for the life of me couldn’t remember terms/names/dates of art pieces but i do remember stories about them and can analyze things really well.

My biggest issue is getting overwhelmed with what is in my head because it’s too much so it can be hard to get it out. I am constantly connecting things in an interdisciplinary way to the point I have had one of my college professors say that I am one of the most interdisciplinary thinkers she knows if not the most. I can’t turn it off and I low key wonder if my brain only understands life through metaphors lol.

Idk if that made sense since I am just waking up from a nap and I am barely coherent but I get that different things work better for different people! I am interested in how dyscalculia effects how people learn! I think 1-3 people in my hall at college have it? I have a little bit of an understanding but I want to know more. In another life I would definitely study neurodivergence and the brain. I am just glad that none of my college classes so far have required exams. Only essays and art pieces(one of my majors is studio art)

From my experience (everyone has different experiences) dyscalculia affects my ability to process simple information that require reasoning rather than memory. It's gonna be a long post, so I'll write everything else under the cut.

I'll try to explain it with an example, starting from math: take something as simple as take-aways, the ones you do in elementary school, even.

The other day, I had to calculate 2021-14. My reasoning was flawed from the start, and I only realised it after my parents made me notice.

I said "okay, let's simplify this." because I know I have to, "If it were 2020-15, that would be 5." I know as much, because as long as something's a multiple of two or of five, I can manage.

I continued, "2020-15=2005. But I need to consider the 1 I dropped to go from 2021 to 2020, and the 1 I added to go from 14 to 15." and I can tell you that I just had to check with my calculator because I was doing it wrong again. Anyway.

"Since I added 1 and took away 1, it would be like doing 1-1, so 0... 2021-14=2005."

And I still swear on whatever you believe in that it still makes no sense to me, even if I try to draw the little dots as if I were six years old. Like, right now. I don't get it. I really took away one and added one, so why would 2021-14=2007? Where did I take that extra 2 from? Try and explain it to me, and I promise that I still won't get it.

I just don't get what I'm doing it wrong, and if the calculator weren't there I'd be dead by now.

Now, expand this problem to every little thing that involves critical thinking. Everything. Most of the problems involve numbers, but not only, sadly.

Formulas. You know algebra, right? Numbers are rare there, and most problems involve data that are letters, or numbers that really don't need to be processed on their own, it's a matter of copying them down correctly.

So, you just need to use the right formula, put the data there, and it's done.

Wrong.

Visual memory allows me to remember formulas easily, but I don't know how to pick the correct data.

If I know that something's, like, the speed of a body, and I know that the speed of a body goes in a certain little spot of the formula, I'll still get it wrong because something happens in between me understanding where I need to put the data and me putting the data in there. I don't know how to explain it, but everything makes no sense at that point.

I can write down the normal formula with each incognita without a problem, but I can't go farther than that because everything is too confused. It's like looking at a language you don't know that uses an alphabet you can't read. You may or may not recognize some patterns, but if you don't know what you're reading, it's like not knowing anything at all.

The other day, my dad explained to me how a turboshaft engine works. Friendly reminder that my average grade in physics was 4/10, never got more than a 6.5/10, despite my best efforts (too many numbers, too many data I didn't know where to put).

Anyway, he explained how that thing works from a mechanical point of view. Did I understand it in its entirety? No. Could I put it into words here for you? Maybe. Could I "draw" it and explain what each part is and how it works from a mechanical pov (so, no data)? Yes, a hundred percent.

What I do is impress the general shape of something- words, images, anything- in my brain, and put it aside. When I need it, I go find it (my technique is to look left, then slightly upwards. That's how I see things in a better way) and just copy it.

Which, by the way, reminded me to say that I also mix up right and left, since I read this thing three times and only realised that I wrote the wrong direction just a second before posting it. This is why I only use the GPS on mute.

Anyway- of course, I don't have perfect visual memory (my grades surely show that), and it doesn't help in each and every situation, and it's also tiring.

But. What I'm great at it's echoic memory. I remember people's voices and what they say to me (out loud) perfectly. I remember my teachers' voices from kindergarten. The info usually fades after a while, but it lasts long enough for me to use it when I need it for a test, or something. And the tone, the characterization of each voice- I don't ever forget those. This is why I remember songs I've heard once, maybe twice, years and years ago. I just... do.

It's not like I have good memory. I forget people's faces, people's names, streets, everything. But only when I know that I won't necessarily need them, or when I could always ask for them again.

My visual and echoic memory kick in when I need info pronto.

Does that make any sense to you? Sorry for the long post aaaa!!

Edit: figured I should add more things that dyscalculia causes.

Plus, only talking about math and anything related to numbers that I know I'll have to elaborate in some way makes me physically sick. Some of my friends think it's funny, I don't, 'cause math anxiety isn't just "aaa I freeze in front of the blackboard", no, it's also (for the most part, too) something that- speaking personally- activates my fight or flight instinct. Imagine an anxiety attack, but not the GAD kind (I do have GAD so I know what I'm talking about), but more "I am in danger. The danger is caused by this. This is dangerous."

I skip numbers when I count (farewell number 7 and everything that ends with it), can't tell 4 and 7 apart without focusing hard, no perception of time, distance, weight, nor speed, I don't understand graphs nor know how to make them properly. Also, mundane events don't happen in the proper order because of me. Just earlier I turned the car off, left the car, reached my doorstep, realized I hadn't locked the car, went to check my bag for the keys, didn't find them, went back the car only to find that I'd even left the door open, and the keys in. Or, sometimes I grab a tissue, throw it away, and realize that I forgot to blow my nose. Etc.

This happens- I think- because the brain cannot comprehend what it's looking at, despite everyone around seems to understand what one's brain should understand as well. It's like when you're stuck in a dream where everyone's laughing and you don't know if they're laughing at you, or at something else. In dreams, you don't ask, you can't. You're frozen and just stick to what you're trying to do.

It works exactly like that.

#ask #anon ask #dyscalculia #dyscalculia awareness #math cw #maths cw #i'd say #math tw #for me. i'm not kidding.

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gtseven7 · 4 years

Text

My Seven Idols

this is the picture mentioned in the story

Summary:

Got7 as highschoolers as they deal with graduation and college at the same time starting up their own Youtube channel as idols.

A/N:

So this is chapter 1. Really, I wasnt supposed to write this thing but it has been bugging me for months and I just cant shake it off okay? I tried resisting thinking, dude you're on your way to the juicy parts of Seven Princes. But whelp I lost a battle within myself and wrote this anyway. I hope you guys like it!

masterlist

//prev

The click-clacking of the keyboard echoed in the room as Y/N furiously typed the remaining subtitle of the video she had been editing the last few nights. Hitting the export button, the brunette could finally exhale and relax. The beach aesthetic video she had been working on was now in the process of being complete. She just has to wait till it loads to a hundred and her hard work will pay off. Smiling to herself, she minimized the editing software and opened up her InstaBook. She scrolled leisurely, seeing the pictures of her peers and some from her photographer idols. Y/N was examining an aesthetic cityscape picture from one of her favorite photo blogs, Def, when her notification alerted her of a great news. Ding! And the words that popped up from the right corner of her screen made her screech. As it was almost midnight, she had to restrain herself and not wake her parents. But she can’t help the giggle that escaped her mouth. She quickly clicked the pop up. It said: pjy_01 updated his profile picture. When the picture loaded, Y/N's jaw almost unhinged. Park Jinyoung a.k.a. Mr. Student Council President rarely posts a picture of himself. His feed was usually just books, food and random sceneries. He did have few self-taken pictures and Y/N was happy with it (some of them are really just bad quality but she’ll take it) but this one? This one’s just beautiful, amazing, gift from the heavens. He was sitting on a comfy white couch, staring directly at the camera with puppy eyes. His white button up was slightly unbuttoned(!!) as he wore an innocent face and a cute peace sign as a cherry on top. Y/N was just about to scream and jump around. But before that, she made sure to save the picture in her Jinyoung Stash folder. “Woah. What is this Jinyoung? You should always post things like this. I’ll be a happy woman.” She sighed dreamily, staring at her screen but missed the notification of her software that finished exporting her video.

Y/N was rudely interrupted when her phone suddenly rang. Not even looking at the caller id, she answered the call with an annoyed tone. “What?” No one would be phoning her at this time other than her best friend. “Yo chill out Y/N.” Youngjae laughed at the other end, knowing he most likely disturbed her from her hobby. Which isn’t entirely false, he just didn’t know that the hobby at the moment was staring at their president and not videography. ”It’s midnight Youngjae, what do you need?” She elicited another hearty laugh from the guy. Any other circumstance, she’ll laugh along since his laugh is contagious but this time was not it. “Well?”

“Geez, aren’t you such a joy tonight. I’m just gonna ask if you already finished the essay homework due tomorrow.”

Blank silence. It was then that Y/N laughed at the ridiculing situation. Homework? Was there ever one? And she voiced it out, still half cheerful and half threatening. Youngjae might be pranking her once again. “The essay homework Mr. Kwon asked us to do. The one about Romeo and Juliet. Don’t tell me you don’t remember?” Youngjae chuckled a little too, thinking that his friend was making fun of him. When the only sound he heard was the bark of his cute dog Coco beside him, Youngjae started to sweat. “You haven’t done a single thing didn’t you?!”

“I think I’m gonna puke. Youngjae-ahh~ What do I do?!”

Y/N's eyes bugged out, realizing that yes, there is indeed an essay due tomorrow. And it is for Mr. Kwon’s subject, her most feared teacher. Oh how that teacher terrifies her whole being. How could she be so stupid?! “Youngjae!!! What do I do? What do I do?!” Panic was starting to rise from her gut, her heart beating too fast that even midnight coffee can’t do. Add the obvious panic in her bestfriend’s voice on the other end, it made things worse for her. “I don’t know! Uh… I can lend you mine? Just modify some parts. Paraphrase things…”

“Oh my God Youngjae I love you. You’re the best!!”

“You owe me one Y/N.”

“I do, I do. Thanks so much.”

They bid goodnight to each other, Youngjae promising to pick her up from her house so she won’t be late; she once again praised his goodness before hanging up. And as promised, he sent her his homework, Jinyoung’s picture on her screen forgotten. Y/N once again typed relentlessly through the night.

“I bet Jinyoung never had a problem like this. Y/N you must do better!”

That motivation fueled her to write the essay about Romeo and Juliet even if she didn’t understand what it was about aside from it being a romance story. Little did the sophomore videographer know, her high pedestaled president sat on his chair under the dim light of his study desk at the same time as her. He was hunched in concentration on the essay he stalled on doing days before it was to be submitted.

No words flowed, his pen stuck mid-air. “Argh. What the heck is this shit about anyway?” Jinyoung huffed as he crumpled his nth paper and tossed it in the bin beside him. His brain was not cooperating with him that night and it’s just frustrating. Why does he have to explain why the economy of their country is not thriving as it used to? It’s just plain bullshit to be honest. He had mountains of council work the past few days and he wasn’t able to attend few classes including the class he was supposed to write this essay for. This is why he hates skipping, when things like this essay arrive, he doesn’t know what to do. He didn’t have time to read up everything that’s why he just went straight to bluffing his way out of the conclusion of the paper. The distracting noise of the instrument app on Jaebeom’s phone didn’t help him much either. “You have your own room, your own bed. Why are you always here?” His housemate just shrugged and continued his melody making. It was sounding good to be honest, not that his friend ever made a bad song but the other’s process was just making the writing too difficult for him. “How can I even finish when you distract me like this?”

“One, Jinyoung, it was your fault for not doing it earlier. Two, you are not distracted by my music. You just don’t want to do that stupid paper.”

And it hit him too well. He’s right. Most times, Jaebeom’s music calms him but this time his brain just straight up refuses to do a thing. His long haired companion exited the app after saving his work. Jaebeom laid down on Jinyoung’s bed. He patted the space beside him, encouraging the other to lie down with him and sleep. “Don’t push yourself too hard. Get some sleep first, you’ve had a harsh week.”

“Get out of my bed.”

“Hmm…”

And with that, Jaebeom closed his eyes to sleep. He’s not a fast sleeper per se, he’s just waiting for Jinyoung to join him but he didn’t. He opened his eyes just a slit saw the student body president scribbling again with a determined face.

Few hours after, it was almost three in the morning. Jinyoung has to get up at six to prepare for their eight o’clock class. He doesn’t like not sleeping properly but for the sake of that damned paper, he had to sacrifice. He sighed once again and turned off the lamp. Looking to his right, he saw his friend sleeping peacefully, facing him from the farther half of the bed. Jinyoung shook his head in exasperation. He sat on the unoccupied side and stared at his friend of ten years. His face lax and serene. The nose ring glints under the soft glow of the stars from the window. Jinyoung’s hand inched towards the other’s face, stopping midway. He clenched his fist and brought it back to himself. ‘Ah, I really wanna remove that nose ring so badly.’

Morning came and the sunlight was harsh on Y/N’s face. She finished her essay in time, luckily. She trudged along the hallways of their small house, the only thing that woke her up completely was the smell of fresh bacon being cooked. She quickly ate her breakfast, showered and said goodbye to her parents with a tired smile. The sound of the bell announced the arrival of Youngjae by their door. She opened it and her friend almost screamed bloody murder. “I thought a zombie came out to eat me.”

“Shut up.”

Youngjae laughed and slung an arm on her shoulders. He ruffled her already messy hair further. “Did you finish the write up?” She gave a gloomy thumb’s up while yawning, earning a giggle from the boy. “Ah seriously, you should take care of your studies more Y/N.”

“Says you. You were up all night long playing. I can see it on the bags under your eyes.”

“At least I finished my work before doing so, unlike someone I know…”

Y/N clicked her tongue in disapproval but she knows he’s right though. “I got carried away with the good shots I had when me and Yeji went to the beach last week. Aah, I made such a good video last night.” Youngjae smiled at her friend as he watched her walk half asleep.

Y/N and Youngjae were friends since they were toddlers. With their mothers practically sisters because of their closeness, and their houses are just one backyard away from each other, the two developed a close friendship. Oftentimes they’d be hanging out in their places, playing video games or reading comics. Although when they started to grow up more, they drifted away slightly, having different circles of friends. That didn’t bother the two of them though. They thought that it’s better to have their friendship outside school so that they won’t get sick seeing each other’s faces all the time. With this, they rarely go to school together anymore. Their classmates are in the dark about their closeness as well.

Youngjae pulled out his phone and scrolled his pictures. He suddenly got excited about showing his bestfriend about his dog’s new outfit he bought recently. “Y/N, Y/N, look at Coco. I bought a new shirt. It’s so cute.” He practically shoved the phone on her eyes but it didn’t matter much to her as she was as excited as him. They practically raised that cute dog together. “Omo! Coco’s so adorable!” They were both bouncing on their steps as they look at the dog’s pictures posing differently with each new clothing. The two of them were cooing. “Ah, Coco is such a joy.”

"Y/N!”

They both stopped on their tracks when they heard a familiar voice. It was Yeji, Y/Ns other bestfriend outside Youngjae (he’s still the bestest but Yeji doesn’t know that). She happily waved at her two classmates, a teasing smile forming on her face already. ‘Youngjae and Y/N walking together eh? How interesting!’

Yeji’s appearance was their cue to head apart so Y/N smiled at Youngjae and said goodbye. “See ya later in class!” He just hummed in agreement, seeing as his peers are also in sight. He waved at Yeji and parted with Y/N He walked towards his other friends and greeted them.

"So Youngjae huh?”

“What about him?”

“Nothing…” Which wasn’t true because now she is sporting a silly smile on her face. Probably imagining things outside of this world and conjuring up different ways how her friend and Youngjae fall in love. Yeji is a fangirl at heart and she just ships everybody. She never imposes it to everyone though, she’s just happy to think about it and keep it to herself. Amazingly enough though, the people she secretly shipped usually ends up together at some point. But Y/N knows her too well and she knows the outlandish things going in her mind right now. “We just happened to meet along the way Yeji.”

“I didn’t say anything!”

The school entrance as it always is, was full of commotion. More so today than usual. Y/N saw a hoard of students lining up the gate with annoyed expressions. ‘Ah, it’s probably President Jinyoung.’ She giggled to herself, happy to see him early in the morning. She’s still a little bit over the moon with his latest picture. “Do I look okay?”, that question snapped Y/N out of her daydream (the picture still lingering at the back of her mind). Yeji took out a small mirror and checked herself out. She combed her hair with her fingers, checked her uniform, straightened everything that doesn’t look ironed out. “You know he just nags at those who violate badly. We’ll never get reprimanded.” Yeji breathed deeply as she puts her mirror back to her bag. “I’m just making sure you know. I don’t want those cold eyes stare at me. It’s scary.” Y/N wanted to protest, ‘Jinyoung’s not scary! It’s a part of his charm!’ but a whine stopped her from doing so. While they were talking, they have pushed inside the crowd to get in and not be late for class. They reached the front where Jinyoung was standing sternly, his mouth thinned in disapproval. “Bhuwakul. How many times do I have to confiscate that earrings of yours?!”

“Why are you so keen on getting these anyway? Would I do better in my tests if I don’t wear them?” The boy, with his id lace yellow (which means he’s a *freshie), was so close to stomping his feet. But Jinyoung was not fazed and just stared at the boy with a piercing stare. “If you wear them, would you do better? No right? So hand them to me. You violated the school dress code. Come get it at my office after school.”

The people around them were murmuring, Y/N even caught what the others are saying. They think that Jinyoung was being unreasonable and harsh for no reason. ‘Which isn’t true! He just cares about what the students of this school looks like.' The sophomore turned to glare at the onlookers that defamed their president. ‘Ungrateful fools.’ But she was startled when the tall boy (oh my he’s tall) beside the one named Bhuwakul spoke innocently. “Let him be, he probably just wants to wear your earrings.” Even Yuna, the student council secretary, was shocked at the carefree manner of his dialogue. The president just raised his right eyebrow, “Kim Yugyeom, button up your uniform and tie your necktie properly.” and reprimanded the other freshie without hesitation. Yugyeom grimaced a bit but did what he was told. ‘You should be the one buttoning your clothes last night President huhu’

Despite the commotion at the front gate (which happens almost everyday as Jinyoung loves to greet the student body with “Rule # 5 under the clause of the dress code law….), Y/N and the students of their campus managed to get to their class safely. When they entered their homeroom, Y/N and Yeji was greeted by Ga Young, another friend of theirs. It seemed that she had only arrived a few minutes before them. “Yo! Entrance was pretty hectic today.”

Yeji made a face and flipped her brow wavy hair away from her face as if she was hassled on their way over. “Ugh, don’t tell us. We had to push our way out earlier.” They both giggled and chattered mindlessly about the events that morning.

“Don’t you think the foreigner freshie earlier was kind of cute?” Ga Young said dreamily, looking at the ceiling as if he could see his face there. “Oh, that one with the earrings?”

“Yep. We’re blessed with another foreigner beauty.” That’s true, the videographer thought. He’d look good on camera.

“Yeon Seo isn’t a foreigner.” Y/N countered, debating that her friend’s crush wasn’t exactly from another country. He grew up in their city just like everyone else is.

“He’s a half-half though.”

“The tall freshie had a face too.”

Yeji and Ga Young started to talk about the new eye candy they found. Those two are fans of idols, especially the amateur ones they have in their school. Y/N absentmindedly listened to the two’s gossip. Sometimes she thinks she’s in a webtoon or something. These kinds of things exist on books and comics even dramas that she consumes. Y/N still can’t believe such things are in her reality. Aren’t groups of popular boys with a cheesy group name only in fiction? She wondered if it’s possible that this is not a real world.

“But you know, I heard rumors that Bhuwakul's gay.”

That piqued Y/N's interest. Not that there’s any problem with being gay, the rumor just caught her interest. Not many people are brave enough to admit their sexuality in their community so it was pretty interesting.

“Eh? Who told you?”

“My freshie cousin told me. He said that he’s close with girls and gives fashion advice. He’s on the softer side as well.”

Huh… Y/N thought it was a baseless rumor after all. “That doesn’t mean he’s gay though.”

“That’s true.”

When the talk about the foreign freshie Bhuwakul ended, the other two started to talk about their favorite topic once again. The Five Roses. Y/N was just done with that subject and had heard enough to last her a lifetime. She couldn’t even understand why the girls in their school seemed to be under their spell. In Y/N’s opinion, they aren’t that good looking. Heck, even Mr. Cold Eyes Jinyoung was much more handsome. ‘Especially if they saw last night’s picture. How come they don’t talk about it?!’

“Ji Woo looked handsome today too!”

‘Oh come on, even Youngjae looks better than that guy.’ At the thought of her bestfriend, she turned to glance at him. He seemed to have caught her and gave him those warm sunny smiles that made her heart beat a bit faster. Even if she doesn’t consider her childhood friend as a man, she’s sure that he’s a good looking guy.

//next

#got7 #got7 fanfic #got7 scenarios #got7 imagines #jackson wang #park jinyoung #kim yugyeom #mark tuan #bambam #choi youngjae #im jaeboem #got7 fic #my seven idols

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