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call-me-aesthetic · 3 years

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If Twisted Wonderland was an American Public School

WARNING: There are some slight sensitive topics that are featured in here! Reader discretion is advised!

Part 2 can be found here

Heartslabyul

Riddle Rosehearts:

- That one preppy girl who takes all honors and AP classes 😑

- Wants everyone to know that he’s becoming a doctor one day for his strict parents or he’ll dishonor the family

- Reminds the teacher about homework, knowing well that he’ll get slander for it

- Complains about how he got a 90 on his test or a B on his report card, a try hard much?

- Wears a cardigan with thicc but cute glasses since he’s one of those people with can’t see shit on the board so he has to move to the front of the class

Ace Trappola:

- The SoundCloud rapper, that’s it

- “Wanna listen to my mixtape? It’s pretty fire, my guy.” 😩🔥

- You will not miss him BLASTING out some song on his Bluetooth speaker, that shit be echoing through the hallways

- Tells you to stop what you’re doing only for him to either sing horribly or do a backflip, thinking that he’s so cool

- Wears a Supreme jacket with AirPods and waves on his head

Deuce Spade:

- Assuming that he’s still a delinquent, he’s that kid with the most fucked up school record

- Not much of a bully but will still talk shit to your face without caring, might even throw stuff at you during a lesson and you would be the one getting in trouble instead of him 🗿

- If he ever gets mad, it would be overdramatic like kicking the desks, punching the lockers, or walking out of the classroom unannounced and everyone would look at each other wondering wtf happened

- Covers the entire desks with drawings of skulls and those “s” if you know what I mean

- Wears Champion hoodies, wants you to know that he’s broke and rich at the same time

Trey Clover:

- The guy that’s not really popular but everyone knows him since he’s in all their classes

- Most people might have a crush on him because he’s REALLY nice 😳👉👈

- Gives off “older brother” vibes based on the way he looks and acts, like offering you a ride home if you beg ask nicely

- Secretly bakes creme brulee but doesn’t want to mess with the flow so he sticks to the status quo

- Wears the school’s hoodie just because he thinks it looks good on him, and the fact that he doesn’t know what else to wear

Cater Diamond:

- Hot Cheetos girl 🥵

- Has a whole buffet of food in his backpack and will not hesitate to eat them during a lesson, no sharing either sorry

- Excuses himself to the bathroom or full on skips class just to film a Tiktok

- Has about 100 followers on Instagram Magicam and brags about how he’s famous

- Wears a Thrasher hoodie with large hoop earrings and his hair in a bun

Savanaclaw

Leona Kingscholar:

- The kid who flunked their freshman year that also sort of vibes with new classmates

- Always gets mistaken as a teacher by people since he looks and sounds old

- Knows the lessons but still fails them anyways, didn’t really give a damn either 🙄

- Captain of every sports club you can think of, never actually plays but has a lot of knowledge on them

- Wears the school’s letterman from years ago since it used to be his brother’s and that he’s too lazy to buy a new one

Ruggie Bucchi:

- That one kid who NEVER has money for the book fair or any other school event

- Always has to ask his classmates for some cash

- If he somehow does, then he’s one of those kids who buys Diary of the Wimpy Kid or the World Record books

- If he’s feeling cheap, he’ll buy the “cool stuff” like the chocolate scented calculator or fruit snacks 😭

- Wears oversized hoodies and basketball shorts that are clearly hand-me-downs

Jack Howl:

- That one athletic kid who’s both scary good and competitive when it comes to school games like football or soccer

- Literally the best player on his team and without him, they’re trash as hell 💀

- Tries his absolute best to support his teammates without yelling at them for how dumb they are

- “KICK THE FUCKING BALL! DO YOUR LEGS EVEN WORK?!”

- Wears the school’s jersey just to show off his “school spirit”

Octavinelle

Azul Ashengrotto:

- The kid who sell snacks for “charity” but everyone knows he’s keeping the money to himself

- If you don’t have cash or try to negotiate with him, the only thing he’ll do is raise the price up

- “What do you mean you don’t have ten bucks? I can see it in your pocket.”

- Just bring nothing with you, he’ll doing anything to steal your stuff 🤭

- Wears a collar shirt with a tie and khakis that have pockets to keep his glasses and money in

Jade Leech:

- The kid who puts on a goody two shoes facade but is actually a stoner

- Only does “safe” drugs like vape but occasionally smokes weed, mostly in the bathroom or behind the school 🌬

- Can play it off and hide the scent when he’s high, teachers never suspect anything from him

- No one really cares to stop him unless he gets caught or something idk

- Wears clothing that either makes him look like a businessman or a junky, there’s nothing in between

Floyd Leech:

- The kid that’s plays basketball or volleyball just because he’s hella tall, and is actually good at the sports but doesn’t put much effort into them

- Always stays behind after gym, even though the teacher tries to make him leave for his next class 😬

- “I swear after this one shot, I’ll go to class.” *He never made that shot*

- Will jump you no matter who or where you are, and will get angry if you step on his new shoes

- Wears the jersey of any famous team with the latest pair of Jordan sneakers

Scarabia

Kalim Al Asim:

- VSCO girl at best, don’t lie to me now 🤡

- The only words he knows are “And I oop– sksksk.” and “Save the turtles.”

- Walks during a track meet while everyone else is running and sweating hard, the teacher doesn’t care either

- Doesn’t really do anything in gym but talks to his classmates and stands near the water fountain to refill his Hydro flask

- Wears tie dye shirts with cute scrunchies

Jamil Viper:

- That one quiet kid who everybody thinks is a serial killer but he’s actually not, I swear

- He just wants school to be over and spend the rest of his summer relaxing 😔

- Although he shouldn’t abuse his “power,” he‘ll move his hands in his pockets or backpack to make it look like he’s about to pull a weapon out.

- “Chill, I’m just grabbing a pencil.” *Everyone in the class started crying*

- Wears dark colored hoodies that intimidates people but are actually comfy

Pomefiore

Vil Schoenheit:

- The baddie popular girl 😌💅✨

- Arrives to school late with a Starbucks in hand from his local Target

- Fixes himself every 5 seconds like reapplying his lipgloss or spraying Bath and Body Works cherry blossom perfume

- Uses acrylic nails and long hair extensions as weapons during a cat fight

- Wears a crop top with ripped jeans and those clout sunglasses

Rook Hunt:

- That creepy guy in the hallways who tries to get your attention, even if you don’t know him

- Scares people when he says, “Ayo, where my hug at?” 🥶💯

- Uses at least 10 cans of Axe body spray a week after gym class, which stinks up the locker rooms

- Waves at you if he passes your class, even walking into the room just to say hi

- Wears literally anything but always include a hat

Epel Felmier:

- The artist girl who just wants to be alone 🧑‍🎨

- Purposely draws in front of you but pretends like you’re not looking

- If you complement him, he’ll just brush it off and proceeds to diss himself

- “Thanks but I’m not THAT good at drawing, teehee.” *Insert Radio Rebel face*

- Wears a hoodie or a cardigan with big pockets to put his art supplies in

Ignihyde

Idia Shroud:

- I don’t even need to tell you who he is, y’all already know ahaha 🥴

- Sneaks a whole PlayStation in his backpack so he can play with it during lunch

- Is on his phone 24/7 even in class to the point where teachers don’t care anymore

- Tries to get people into anime but only to little success

- Wears a shirt of any anime character or that damn ahegao hoodie, girl bye

Ortho Shroud:

- The nerdy kid who’s known for destroying others at many games

- Plays classics like D&D, Yugioh, Pokémon, the whole shabang

- Daily Beyblade battles during recess with everyone surrounding him, the menacing aura radiates off of him

- Will steal your things if you lose to him but gives it back a week later cuz he’s sweet 🥰

- Wears light up Sketchers shoes and those Minecraft shirts you find at Old Navy

Diasomnia

Malleus Draconia:

- The theatre kid who also goes to band practice, change my mind 👁👄👁

- Takes his role seriously when it comes to school plays and concerts, even if he gets casted as a damn tree or doesn’t go solo

- Remembers the songs and their lyrics to any musical you name, a really good singer at that too

- Plays almost every instrument, you definitely know this since you can hear him down the hallways during a test

- Wears a white button up shirt, black pants with fancy dress shoes, and top it all off with a fricking Rolex watch

Lilia Vanrouge:

- The weird guy who pranks people and vandalizes school property in every way possible

- If you ever get a textbook with a message that tells you to go to a certain page only for you to found a picture of a dick, yeah that was him 😒

- When using a Chromebook, he’ll leave a tab open on YouTube so when the next person uses it, pray that your ears will still work by tomorrow

- During lunch, he is a literal DEMON that mixes milk with chicken nuggets together and having the audacity to eat it too

- Wears an oversized raincoat or a windbreaker but idk wtf kind of things he has hiding underneath

Silver:

- That guy in class who consumes Monster energy drinks and falls asleep 99% of the time but somehow manages to pass the class 🤷

- Whenever he’s awake, he’ll talk to the teachers since he’s basically friends with them for some reason

- Writes his name out of boredom on any desk you sit on but in different places, sometimes around the corners or the sides

- Has a sixth sense because he’ll wake up if you try to draw on his face and if you did get something on him, it’s on sight

- Wears those colorful hoodies that zips all the way up to cover his face with a matching backpack, it’s pretty cool ngl

Sebek Zigvolt:

- That kid who literally knows everything about historical wars and will show it off during class

- Also has knowledge on weaponry, which has people questioning him but he’s just very dedicated on serving his country and people

- Knows how to fight and defend himself from a bitch since he spent his summer at a military boot camp, put respect on my man’s name 😤

- Honestly a great partner for a group project, actually does the given work but not the whole thing for you

- Wears anything that has camo pattern and chunky combat boots

I only made this because me and my friends were talking about our school memories so yeah. This is based from my experience so they might not be exactly accurate. Might even be a part two if you want.

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cooloddball · 3 years

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JIB9 (JIBCON 2018) ANALYSIS PART 2

Go read part 1 of jib9 analysis if you haven’t read it already.

Continuing from where we left off...

Misha says no, he doesn’t think that Cas feels like part of the family and Jensen smirks and looks down while Jared smiles

Jensen helps Misha along with his answer

Jensen defends Sam and Dean after Misha says they don’t show emotion saying things like “I love you so much”

Jens: “There are a few scenes where you know,”

Jared: “Didn’t you see the one with the whole if we die we will do that together too?”

Jens: “Yeah that was emotional”

This is getting serious people. Remember this is season 13 they are talking about.

Jens keeps going on “you know there was embracing, and then there was a lot-I mean…” This whole time Jensen is looking at Misha

Misha is like “All I’m saying…”

And Jensen cuts Misha off and says, “Did you miss that?”

Look at Jared’s face here though. He’s like are you guys having a lovers’ quarrel? Am I missing something?

Misha tries to talk again but Jensen is adamant, unrelenting to give up on that there was an emotional scene between Dean and Cas. 13x05??? “Were you not there?”

Misha being who he is and not backing down either he says, “NO” rather defiantly.

Jared’s face here though. He stopped talking and is watching these two lovers go at it. (No, not the sexy kind)

Jensen doesn’t look too thrilled about what Misha said. Jared laughs Jensen is basically done at this point. Look at his face.

Misha continues “That was Castiel”

And Jensen just looks appalled, he raises his eyebrows looks down at his hands [0.43 insert Jensen’s face atm] and since Misha is looking at him and he sees that Jensen is unhappy he adds “I’m very method.”

Jensen goes to say something but stops himself, Jared senses the tension, Misha is still looking at Jensen and Jensen hasn’t looked at Misha since he asked him “were you not there?”

IDK what is going on here but it fees like more than just about Dean and Cas and more like it’s about Jensen and Misha. I mean Jared and Misha are having fun with it and Jensen just seems adamant to prove they care A LOT about Cas which is weird considering the fact that the moment Misha was asked that question Jensen agreed with Jared that they are not as pleased that Cas was back (this was a joke) . So what has changed since then? Only a few seconds have passed.

Jensen presses on, “I mean was Cas there? I know he was there physically but was he there emotionally? Because it doesn’t sound like it.”

The way Misha is holding his microphone he looks scared. Jensen can’t take his eyes off Misha.

Misha says, “see this is what I’m talking about” I think he realizes Jensen is getting too emotional and personal on stage and he decides to guide the conversation to the funny side.

Jensen laughs .

Misha says “ I don’t think he [Cas] lets himself feel worthy or wanted” and Jensen keeps looking at a fixed spot on the floor and I don’t know what’s so interesting there. Jared says “smart” in reference to Misha’s statement and Jensen nods.

Jared tries to make fun but Misha is not having it, he [Misha] looks at an imaginary watch and says “That said-uh…that said I think this season he’s felt more part of the team and the family…probably *looks at Jensen* more than ever before” Now I talked about that moment here but I have to reiterate, something is off here tbh. I don’t know what was going on with Jensen but something was definitely off.

I have been thinking about what the causation of Jensen’ s behaviour could be and I have come to a very weird and maybe kind of controversial conclusion, IDK. But here’s what I think. Maybe Misha finally told Jensen that he didn’t feel like he was part of the family because of the way they treated him and talked shit about him at J2 panels? Like how he pretended to gag when he saw Misha on screen during the jib9 j2 panel the previous day. Or the extreme pranks Jared played on him and Jensen just stood aside? The way some j2 fans send hate to him and that it gets to him. Maybe he finally opened up. Because if that is the case then, Jensen blamed himself for making Misha feel like that when he didn’t have any intention to? I hope I’m making sense. Or maybe it could be something else entirely but I feel like since 2017 Jensen had stopped going along with Jared’s attempts to make fun of Misha at their panes. So maybe this was him feeling bad that he ever played a part in that??? Okay my head hurts I have to move on.

Since that moment Jensen doesn’t look okay, even when Mishalecki are bantering with the next fan, Jensen just seems sad? Sad is not the right word but he seems kind of upset

So the fan makes a small mistake in what she’s asking and Misha laughs then Jensen turns to look at him for a brief second, it’s literally for a second and Misha looks at him with his big blue eyes but Jensen looks away rather quickly. I think they can both feel the weight of the previous answer Misha gave simmering beneath the surface but they can’t talk about it atm.

Now Jared says something rather weird to me, “A man who goes to sleep with an itchy butt wakes up with a smelly hand.” (I know it’s a saying or whatever but it’s just a strange thing to say or maybe it’s just me) Jensen is nodding along to that but Misha doesn’t look amused. I think it’s an interesting thing to say when two of your best friends who play with each other’s butts are seated on stage with you. I’m not sorry I said that because it had to be said.

For a literal microsecond, Misha looks at Jensen but Jensen is looking at a fixed spot on the floor as has become norm in the last 2 minutes. Mish suppresses a smile because he knows Jensen still feels bad about earlier.

Jared says that’s why he thinks the brother’s and Cas have to die in order for the show to end and Jensen’s face is just stoic. Dude wtf??

Jensen joins in the banter and makes a joke about a man who stands on a toilet while high on pot he’s not crazy he’s just high? J2 make another joke about a man going backwards to Bangkok or something. Misha manages to laugh at those jokes.

Jared asks Misha if he has anything to add and Jensen looks at Misha smiling look at the way he’s looking at Misha. It’s like he wants to stuff him in his pocket and take him home with him.

Jensen is laughing so hard now because Misha says that the only sayings that come to mind are the only ones he doesn’t want to say.

They try to pronounce the German word and it’s hilarious AF.

So Jared makes a joke of a sound that the fan is helping them pronounce and Jensen is just done. Completely done because he looks away and scratches his beard like he wants to be anywhere but there. JFC What is going on? He was happy again.

OMG husbands whispering at each other while Jared is engaged with a fan. Gossipy Jensen. Also I’m glad whatever tension was there after the Cas question is finally gone and they are back on track again.

They are in there own little world because IDK what Misha whispered to Jensen but Jensen is unicorn laughing. Aww J

“We just said some really bad shit” I like it when Jensen curses. Now I want to know what they said because when Misha whispers it to Jared, he laughs really hard as well. Oh to be a tiny ant crawling around, listening to their whispered secrets. A girl can dream am I right?

7.33 Jared asks the fan what her “that German/Austrian word” was that morning and I am inclined to think whatever the husbands were whispering to each other had something to do with a sex-related orifice because of the way Jensen reacts.

The fan puts Jared in his place. Look at Jensen’s reaction.

He’s like you go girl.

Jensen wants to whisper something to Misha so bad but he stops himself.

Okay so Jensen says he did bicycle touring and he did take part in some of the quests. Is he talking about GISHWES because he never can pronounce that word. LOL.

So Jared interrupts Jensen starts telling his story and Jensen just shuts down just look at his face the entire time Jared is telling it.

Misha and Jared are talking about how it’s so hot on stage and Jensen is just miming to the fans how it’s not hot. I love when he does that. Naughty boy.

Misha moans and he and Jared just rush off to point the fan in their direction while Jensen just stands over the fan on his side of the stage and cools his balls off.

OMG!!!! Misha is doing the mating dance while making fiery eye contact with Jensen and sips from the bottle. Jensen heeds his husband’s call to mate and walks briskly in long manly steps to wards him and he takes the drink off his hand while looking at him like he wants to eat him [it’s called a mating dance for a reason] and inhales the drink whatever it is and it must be really strong because he looks away and says something to Jared. Misha walks away says something to Jared and goes to sit down. Jensen starts twerking his booty. Misha your man wants to mate on stage do something. Anyway Jensen pours the drink that Misha had sipped directly from the bottle in a shot glass and does the rck on sign and sips it. The entire time Mishalecki are just looking at Nesnej and laughing not understanding what is going on.

Jared sniffs the drink and says “poker face” and Jensen says “thanks Lady Gaga” IDK if this was a snide comment or just banter but now we know Jensen listens to Lady Gaga and Katy Perry (re: jib8).

This part is really funny when the fan thanks Misha for sending a recovery message to her friend but Misha says that he had no choice but to do it because the fan just held out the phone to Misha and Misha was like “oooh, heeey”

I think Jared asks Misha what happened and Misha explains because Jared folds over laughing.

Jared starts talking before Jensen can answer the question and again Jensen doesn’t look too amused. This guy keeps stealing his thunder.

Jensen manages a smile when he hears that Misha did a German accent

Misha asks Jensen if he wants some tips on accents and Jensen smiles and says no. Ouch. Sorry Mish, your man doesn’t want your help. He’d rather wing it.

Misha is not backing down and compliments Jensen by listing all the accents that Jensen can do. We love a supportive husband. Hype your man Mish.

Jensen says that he speaks French and he has a little have a tête-à-tête in français. I find it funny how Misha pretends not to know Jensen speaks French yet he just listed all the accents Jensen can do. Sure Jan. And after the French interaction which Misha adds a flair of a French accent when he talk as and , Jensen tries really hard not to smile. Someone’s excited. #accent kink ;)

Jensen says he doesn’t think Michael is going to need an accent and Misha says yes he will in French accent and Jensen is just trying really really hard not to smile.

Look at Jared’s face though he’s like dude are you seriously turned on by Misha’s weird accent right now? It’s not even funny and Jensen can’t stop smiling.

Jensen is done with Misha’s shenanigans so he just cuts him off and Misha is exasperated and Jensen proceeds to ask his question.

Fan says she would improve on Misha’s German accent and Misha gasps scandalized and even Jensen is not happy about that but he takes this moment to make fun of Misha so the comment doesn’t seem as harsh

Look at Misha’s face

and here is Jensen’s face he can’t believe someone was mean to his baby.

Anyway, in an attempt to make it less painful for his man he tries to make and joke and says, “I didn’t send that out with the insult in mind but I’m really glad that happened.”

The joke makes it worse and Misha doesn’t seem to feel better. Poor Misha.

It’s over.

Time for the closing ceremony

Jensen and Briana singing.

Misha and Adam

I love their friendship, makes me think of the possibilities that could’ve been between Cas and Mick on the show.

OMG Jensen you naught boy, yeah I see you have experience humping and spanking. Go on Rockstar we love to see it.

Even Jason Mann’s sees Jensen humping the air and Misha and Jensen turn to look at Jason. Jensen is smirking at him after what he just did. OMG.

The way Jensen is looking at Rob when Rob tries to sing the remaining verses of carry on my wayward son. Jensen you need apple juice. Jensen is me. He is insane and he is me and I love him. JENSENKIN!!!!

Why are Jensen and Misha gravitating towards each other unconsciously? Do their hearts have magnets that pull towards each other?

Speaking of them why does Jensen seem extremely tall here and Misha looks so tiny.

Am I the only one who doesn’t like the guy who played Ketch? OMG he just rubs me off the wrong way.

OMG is Jared trying to touch Jensen’s hand? Eww He touched Jensen’s arm and Jensen didn’t even look at him. This is embarrassing. Jensen hasn’t looked at him once/ HELP.

Misha and Jensen are standing the same way at the exact same time and they aren’t even looking at each other. OMG!! This is insanity.

Jensen turns to smile at Misha. Aww J

Jensen looks at Misha with a smile on his face when Daniela says they’ll be back the next year the year that gave us straddle gate and boners.

It’s over guys.

So I have come to the conclusion that something was going on between Jensen and Jared at jib 9.

See you on the next one.

Part 1

#cockles #jib9 #jibcon 2018 #jib9 cockles panel analysis #j2m

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threecrowsinatrenchcoat · 3 years

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Paint My Spirit Gold

Dukeceit Week Day 2: Green/Yellow

Fans of the YouTubers "Deceit" and Remus "The Duke" Sanders start to suspect that maybe, just maybe, the two of them are more than simple internet pals.

AO3 Link: [here]

Word Count: 2187

Warnings: n/a

@dukeceitweek <3

[ID: A screenshot of a Twitter post by user @CallMeDukie. It features a watercolor-style painting of a snake. The snake appears to be made of melting chocolate, and there is a large bite taken out of its tail. Cherries and jam are leaking out of the snake at the bite wound. The snake's expression of horror is overly-exaggerated to the point of comedy. The caption reads: "liked your snake boi, @SerpenThyme. thanks for the inspo." /end ID]

A notification ding cut Janus off mid-sentence.

“Wow, someone left their cell phone on, so professional,” he said, giving the camera a dramatic eye roll. That someone was him, of course, because he was the only one in the apartment- just him and the running livestream- but that was no excuse not to be a drama queen about it. He finished wiping flour off his hands and grabbed his phone to silence it; but the notification made him pause. He flicked his eyes up toward the camera and gave a slight smirk.

“My goodness, I’m famous,” he drawled. “The Duke himself has graced little old me with some fan art.”

Most of the comments in the chat wanted him to show it, so Janus opened up Twitter to see the full post he’d been tagged in. It was a watercolor painting of the coiled-snake chocolate sculpture- lovingly named Jake by his viewers- he’d made for his YouTube video last week; it was wearing an expression of such comedic horror that Janus had to stifle a laugh. He flicked his phone screen toward the close-up camera on his counter so his viewers could see.

“How kind of you, Remus,” he said. “All of you should go scold him for what he’s done to poor Jake here.”

Most of his viewers would know he was joking- after all, they were the ones to nickname him Deceit when he provided neither a real or fake name for his online persona. They knew full well what he was like by now.

The oven timer dinged. Janus silenced his phone and set it aside.

“And our first batch of cookies is done. You know, why don’t we show the Duke some appreciation?”

[ID: An Instagram post by user @SerpenThyme. The photo is an artistically-framed shot of a stack of sugar cookies with green, yellow, and pink icing. Propped up against the stack is another cookie, with an intricate icing-drawing of an octopus. The photo appears to have been color corrected to have high contrast, low saturation, and a dark vignette at the edges. The Instagram user @OctoDukie is tagged. No caption. /end ID]

“You know, I have often been accused of actually being a little old lady, what with my fondness for knitted jumpers, rocking chairs, and incredibly fucked up murder mystery books. Today I am doing nothing to dispel this accusation, by making soup.”

The studio was dark and empty aside from Remus' workspace. Everyone else had left long ago, even his own brother, which meant that it was officially ass-o'clock in the morning (or, as most people called it, somewhere between 1 and 2 a.m.) But Remus was stuck in hyperfocus, honed in on putting the last touches on a commission that he'd been putting off for weeks. It's not that it was a tough painting- once he'd gotten started, it was actually a very creatively satisfying piece- but man, executive dysfunction could go suck a dick

“French onion soup, specifically. Because while I do like to pretend I am a classy bitch, I am also, regrettably, a lazy bitch with a distaste for anything that takes longer than one bottle of wine to make.”

Remus hated working in silence. It was stifling, almost suffocating. His brain needed noise like his lungs needed air. So when the studio had grown still and silent, Remus had flipped open his laptop and queued up some YouTube videos.

“So we have here three pounds of onions that we need to slice up, pole to pole. You’re going to cry no matter what, so if you have any memories you’ve been repressing since middle school, now is an excellent time to dredge those up.”

And if it happened to be 90% SerpenThyme videos, well. Sue him.

“Now the first rule of caramelizing onions: fast and sloppy is always better than slow and thorough… at least, that’s what every man I’ve ever slept with tells me.”

Remus choked and glanced over to his laptop screen just in time to catch Deceit's trademark smirk directed at the audience just for a moment. It was the deadpan delivery that always got him. Remus could barely hold onto a joke long enough to get through it without cackling mid-punchline, but this fucker could say the funniest shit like an off-hand comment.

He wiped his hands off on his jeans (what use were clothes if you couldn't use them as paint rags?) and pulled his laptop across the table. He typed out a quick comment, citing the timestamp of the joke, and after it was posted, he shut his laptop.

'Cause ass-o'clock was short for "get-your-ass-home-or-I’ll-kick-it" o'clock.

[ID: A screenshot of a YouTube comments section. The first comment is by user TheDuke, and reads: "10:42 wow, rude." The second comment is a reply by user SerpenThyme, and simply reads ";)" /end ID]

Janus plopped down on the couch with a slight groan. He didn’t need to stream today, but he really hated missing days. Besides… he was fine. Really.

He adjusted the camera until he was happy with the framing, and then checked the settings on his streaming software. Satisfied, he started the stream, and watched as his usual viewers rolled in.

“What do you mean I’m not in my kitchen?” Janus drawled, addressing the chat. He glanced around with an expression of faux-shock on his face. “My goodness, when did that happen?”

He chuckled, and then gestured to his surroundings. “Yes, we are in my living room today. If you must know, my closest and most trusted friend tried to murder me today- yes, Virgil, it was attempted murder and nothing less- and I survived with nary a scratch… and a broken foot, but that is beside the point. Anyway, I’m not allowed to stand for long periods of time, and I may or may not be somewhat inebriated by pain pills and couldn’t stand even if I wanted to. So we are cooking from my couch today.”

Janus paused for a few moments to read the chat messages as they popped up. A few get well soon’s, a few theories about the “attempted murder,” Virgil- who moderated his chat for him- vehemently denying the “attempted murder” but otherwise refusing to clarify the event, and a large volume of wtf why are you streaming today, take care of yourself comments, which made him smile. But one particular comment caught his eye, almost lost amid the torrent of an active chat: wait this kinda looks like the Duke’s living room?

“Oh, VampSuga,” he said, addressing that commenter in particular with a slight smirk. “I haven’t the faintest idea what you’re talking about. Anyway, since I can’t reach my oven from here, I thought some no-bake cookies were in order. For these you will need-”

[ID: A screenshot of a Discord conversation. The text reads:

“VampSuga: Ok ok hear me out. Dukeceit.

Starstruck96: who?

IneffableSnek: lmao

FeralBeauYasha: lol

VampSuga: Deceit and Remus Sanders! They’re totally dating. I will die on this hill.

FeralBeauYasha: Isn’t the duke w/ PatPat?

IneffableSnek: no thats his brothers bf

FeralBeauYasha: ohh

VampSuga: Did anyone see Deceit’s stream today? I swear that’s the Duke’s livingroom.

StarStruck96: idk that seems like a stretch

IneffableSnek: no wait i kno what u mean

IneffableSnek: im watching the duke’s old videos and that one where he shows off all his old weapons he’s in a living room kinda like deceit’s

FeralBeauYasha: They were acting all cute on twitter too

VampSuga: DUKECEIT” /end ID]

"Hey guys, been a while since you've seen my face and not just whatever my hands are busy with, when it's within YouTube's terms and conditions I mean. They used to be way more lenient…" Remus trailed off for a moment, then shook his head sharply and plastered on a grin.

"Anyway! In June me and a few other creators did a fundraiser for the Trevor Project, and y'all smashed the goal, so I let you decide what video I'd make this month." He paused, and gestured to the mountain of clothes piled behind him on the bed. "And you had so many juicy ideas to choose from, but you decided to dress me up like a Barbie instead."

Remus paused to scroll through his phone for a few moments. "Ah, ok, here we go. Twitter user YoonIsMyCat- oh, BTS, nice- sent in this first outfit. Uh… future Remus, put up the post here somewhere." He gestured vaguely to his right. "Y'all went with either a fuckton more clothes or a fuckton less clothes, which I respect. Apparently this outfit is called…” He squinted at his phone. “Amish chic? I take it back, no respect at all.”

Remus cycled through the outfits his viewers sent in, which ranged from the aforementioned “Amish chic” to “2008 rave attire” to “ok now you guys are just fucking with me” (which consisted of one of those big puffy snow coats, lime green in color; booty shorts with the shrug text emoji across the ass; fuzzy pink boots; and a yellow cowboy hat to top off the whole thing. It was awful. Remus loved it.) The mountain of clothes on the bed gradually became a mess of clothes spread across the floor instead, until there was just one outfit left.

“Ok so Twitter user VampSuga sent me this outfit that I’m gonna call ‘sexy librarian.’ I couldn’t find this exact sweater online, but-” he paused for dramatic effect, before brandishing a sweater toward the camera like a bullfighter. “My boyfriend had something that was close enough.”

Remus hopped up from the bed and switched off the camera so he could change.

“They’re going to lose their minds,” a voice drawled from the doorway. Remus threw his shirt at him.

“Shoo, I’m getting naked.”

[ID: A Twitter post by user @CallMeDukie. It features a selfie of YouTuber Remus “The Duke” Sanders, a Hispanic man with his hair dyed green and styled into a spiked mohawk. He is wearing a yellow knitted cardigan over a black button-up shirt. He is grinning widely at the camera. The caption reads: “my viewers pick my outfits! now live on youtube. go see what i look like as a sexy librarian!” /end ID]

DukeceitStan

first and only dukeceit shipper ig

DukeceitStan

wow there’s so many of you now! Hi!!

DukeceitStan

i want this to be canon so bad omg

DukeceitStan

i mean just look

[image]

how

[image]

cute

[image]

[ID: A series of three gifs featuring Youtubers SerpenThyme, aka Deceit, and TheDuke, aka Remus Sanders. Deceit is a black man with long, dreadlocked hair, and vitiligo patches along the left side of his face. Remus is a Hispanic man with green-dyed hair styled into a mohawk, many ear and facial piercings, and tattoos covering both arms. Each gif is edited so that the highlights are tinged yellow when Deceit is seen, and tinged green when Remus is seen.

The first gif depicts a close-up shot of Deceit’s hands as he carefully decorates a cookie with green and yellow icing. The cookie art he is working on appears to be a half-finished octopus. The gif then fades into a mid-shot of Remus, with his back to the camera, facing a canvas. The canvas is blank, and Remus appears to be laying out paints on a table to his left.

The second gif depicts Deceit seated at his couch, facing the camera. He has many ingredients spread across his coffee table (including oats, cocoa powder, and butter) and appears to be in the process of laying out several more. The gif fades to show Remus seated at a similar couch with a similar coffee table in front of him. The camera is angled slightly downward to better show the myriad of knives spread out across the table. Remus is gesturing wildly with a morning star held in his hand.

The third gif depicts Deceit in his kitchen. He is pulling on a bright, yellow knitted cardigan, and smirking toward the camera. The gif fades to show Remus in his bedroom, seated on his bed. He is holding up a similar-looking cardigan toward the camera and grinning. /end ID]

“Remus, it’s almost two in the morning. Come to bed.”

“I’m coming, sorry. Twitter distracted me.”

“Mm. I can’t believe the bird app is more distracting than I am.”

“You should try harder.”

“Come to bed and maybe I will.”

“Ok, ok, I’m coming. Hang on though, is it cool if I post this?”

“Sure. They figured it out anyway.”

“Sweet. Ok, Jannie, I’m coming.”

[ID: A screenshot of a Twitter post by user @CallMeDukie. It reads: “Dukeceit is canon.” /end ID]

#dukeceit #dukeceitweek #remus sanders #janus sanders #sanders sides fic #kye writes

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notmanagingmymischief · 2 years

Note

yes this took way longer than 2 hours and yes it takes up a 10-page google doc and no im not ashamed <3

—

also this is my universe now and ransom riggs can go suck it because in my head Abe never leaves for war because we do not need jacob entering the world. Ever.

Tbh idk where or why the fandom started hating jacob but im here for it (granted i havent seen the movie in ages and didn’t finish the book series lol)

When you'd realized that you could play your downloaded music offline

Hello spotify premium ad (im kidding, i love this opening line <3)

But starting December 1st, the only music you had played was Christmas music.

I start the week of halloween hehe

But it also made her smile, especially when you had your door cracked open and she could see you dancing around your room, singing the lyrics loudly, the younger children joining you occasionally, singing and dancing along with you.

AAAAWWWWWWWW ALMAAAAAAA

And amongst the four of them, they hatched a plan.

Uh oh ;)

Saw how you acted around each other, each interaction strangely tense and, sometimes, bordering on flirtatious, and Emma was nothing if not a hopeless romantic, one who in turn got most of the others just as invested in your relationships.

Lmao emma you poor sweet soul. I love you

You found some old fashioned string lights, which you hung around the edges of the sitting room, as well as some areas outside--that was a challenge, seeing as there was no electrical source outside the house, meaning you also had to find a way to sneakily retrieve an extension cord that you spent at least an hour, possibly more, getting put in place so that it was out of sight (and out of mind).

Pfffftttt lmaoo

Once the job was finished, it earned you a kiss on the cheek from Alma, which honestly kept you going for the rest of the week without a drop of caffeine; quite impressive.

Literally me when I get a hug from my favorite person whom I will never ever get together with and yet I love perhaps too much

No but in all seriousness this is so cute wtf

Also alma giving free cheek kisses????? I will gladly volunteer myself <3333

A decent amount of the ornaments had ended up near the bottom of the tree since most of the kids could only reach so high, though they did have some help from you and Alma, lifting them up when they really wanted to place theirs higher up.

Good thing they don’t have a dog bc that would really mess with those lower placed ornaments

OKAY BUT ALMA LIFTING UP THE KIDS IS SUCH AN ADORABLE IMAGE WTF

Watching the ymbryne interacting so actively with her charges was endearing, and left a fond smile resting on your face even hours after everyone was finished.

Screaming, crying (perfect storms)

Sorry i was listening to taylor swift yesterday

BUT ANYWAY– THIS IS SO CUTE

At some point, Alma got confused as you worked on one of the special ones, a batch of peanut butter blossoms.

Not gonna lie, i did need to look up what those kind of cookies are but thats fiiiiiinnneee

She hadn't seen these kind, and had ended up positioning herself behind you to watch you work over your shoulder, hips pressed snug against you and hands absently resting on your waist. Your breath got caught in your throat, but you did your best to pretend that the closeness wasn't affecting you even as your cheeks burned hotly. Still your hands worked steadily, years of practice making it easy to work on autopilot. "What are you making?" Alma whispered in your ear, and you cleared your throat before replying "They're called peanut butter blossoms. They were my dad's favorite so I've made them a lot," you recalled, "I think that--that the children will like them." Alma hummed, resting her chin on your shoulder for a moment longer before finally stepping away and returning to her own tray, checking the oven absently.

oKAY WHAT THE FUCK

THIS IS SO CUTE

DOES ALMA KNOW WHAT SHE’S DOING BECAUSE IF SHE DOES ITS VERY SMOOTH

No but actually i love this paragraph so much, it just melts my heart

The casual intimacy of this moment is described so perfectly; i love it.

It was an action that made Alma quite happy, always enjoying you interacting with her children so easily, doing things for them that you really didn't have to do, simply because you wanted to.

<333333333333<333<3333333

I love this so much omg

You caught her eye once, in the window, and grinned towards her, casually tossing a snowball at the window that made the ravenette step back automatically. When she returned she was scowling, but you could tell it was playful and winked back before bringing your attention to Hugh, who was pulling at your arm to help him build a snowman, aptly named Frosty.

DUDE THIS IS SO CUTE WTF I LOVE IT SO MUCH

Also because it’s totally something i’d do

It was every part the classic Christmas card image, like coming home to a warm house, wife and children waiting eagerly to celebrate Christmas Eve. The correlation you automatically made between the idea of a wife and Alma made your pace stutter, along with your breath, but before anyone could notice you schooled your features.

OOOOOOOOoooOOOOooOooooOOOOOOOOOOoooooOOOOO

Her eyes moved up and caught on a few spots of snow in your hair. Casual as can be, she reached out and raked her fingers through it, effectively melting the delicate flakes, along with your heart, and you ducked your head, flustered as you thanked her quietly.

aaAAAAAAAaaaaaAAAaAAAAAAAAAAAAaaaaaAAAAAAaaaAAAaaaaaaAAAA

MY HEART IS DYING

THIS IS SO ADORABLE

AGAIN WITH THE CASUAL INTIMACY WTF

They received it of course, until finally Alma stated that it was time to eat. You felt bad that you'd forgotten to come in and help her, but she assured you that it was fine and you playing with the children--therefore keeping them out of the kitchen, and the house peacefully silent--was enough help.

Look at them working together without even realizing it <3

You muttered a compliment to Alma about her cooking, delicious as always, and the ravenette smiled back playfully, teasingly stating "Did you expect any different, darling?" You went along with the jeer, and just as smoothly replied "Of course not, dear." Paired with a wink it left Alma a bit speechless; you weren't often one for endearments, so the sudden use of one was a welcome surprise. Still the woman cleared her throat and refocused on the rest of the kids and her own meal, refusing to give you the satisfaction of seeing her flustered. You chuckled at her stubbornness but made no comment on it.

PFFFT THIS IS SO CUTE WTFFF

I LOVE IT AND YOU <3333

ALSO THE PET NAMES IM DYING

All of them besides the older children fell for it, of course, but even they kept the spirit up and pretended to believe your words.

Tbh im continually surprised that these teenagers are actually nice people. They don’t complain all the time or ruin things like santa for the littler (idk if thats a word but whatever) kids. It’s actually so refreshing to see and I love the way that you portray that <3

Alma lingered in the doorway as her children walked past, some giving her hugs and others passing with no more than a smile and nod.

LOOK AT EVERYONE RESPECTING EVERYONE ELSE’S BOUNDARIES I LOVE TO SEE IT

Finally you found one, tapping on it and turning up the volume as "I'll Be Home for Christmas" began playing.

I totally listened to this song while reading this part of the fic hehe

You smiled mischievously and held out your hand, dropping the phone onto a table. "May I?" Alma looked between you and the proffered hand skeptically, asking "Do you even know how to dance?"

ALMA

LMAO

You scoffed playfully, mocking offense as you exclaimed "Do I know how to--Alma! What do you take me as? Uncultured?" "Yes, actually." The casual comeback, slipping from her lips alongside a blank expression, made you laugh loudly.

THIS IS SO FUNNY OMG I LOVE IT SO MUCH

Your grin had dimmed into a fond smile and you automatically placed your other hand on Alma's waist, earning you a strange look; perhaps she's used to leading.

Of course she’s used to leading. That's a very alma thing to do

You watched carefully as Alma's expression relaxed and she muttered "I will admit, you do have...some skill."

Normally you'd return it with your own teasing jab but tonight you just hummed and murmur "Told you so." Alma rolled her eyes but also smiled, and you knew that she was enjoying herself as her hand tightened just slightly in yours.

AAAAWWWWW THEY’RE SO CUTEEEEEE

Also lmao alma

A few minutes passed, and Abe finally prepared to leave you two be, giving you some much needed privacy, just barely hearing you mutter "I believe we're being watched," and Alma replying "Oh yes. You just now noticed?"

Lmaooooooooo

I love this little scene

As soon as the room fell silent again, you bid your goodnight to Alma, snuck in a quick kiss to her cheek, and slipped out of the room and up to yours, ignoring the little "hey!" the ymbryne let out.

AWWWWWW <3

Together, they talked quietly and finished planning their...well, plan, and promised to put it into motion at the first sign of Alma's wake the next morning.

Hehehe

I love these kids so much

The next morning, you were awoken by a beam of warm sun in your eyes, having forgotten to close your curtains the previous night. You yawned and stretched your arms above your head, reluctantly getting out of bed after a few more minutes of rest.

Imagine being able to sleep in on christmas morning

Couldn’t be me

I woke up at 4am on christmas this year and didn’t go back to bed until 12 that night

"Wait! Not yet!" You gave her a skeptical look, already suspicious. "There's a surprise for you and it's not ready yet," the small brunette claimed, and you took a deep breath, hesitant to believe her but, not wanting to ruin the 'surprise', nodded and agreed to wait until she gave you permission.

EVEN THE LITTLES ARE IN ON IT TOO

Instead of kids sitting by the tree, you instead found Alma by the tree. Not sitting, rather kneeling. She was wearing her usual outfit, but as she raised her head, having heard your surprised gasp at seeing her, you noticed a ruby red bow tied loosely and delicately around her neck, the same color as your lipstick.

BIRD

HOW ON EARTH DID THEY GET ALMA TO DO THAT?????????

Nearly speechless, you did manage to choke out a slightly cracked version of her name, earning you a nervous smile. When she didn't move or stand up, you hesitantly walked closer, watching her unusually timid behavior carefully. The woman's head bowed slightly again, gaze not meeting yours even when you stood directly in front of her. Taking a chance, you carefully hooked your fingers under Alma's chin to tilt her head back up, forcing her eyes up as well. They connected with yours and you could see the anxiety swimming just beneath the surface as you stared down at her in confusion. "How in the world did you let yourself be talked into this, Alma?" You asked, a smile finally playing on your lips. It slightly relaxed the woman, and gave her enough courage to reply "Honestly, I'm not quite sure. I suppose I have a weakness for seven children collectively begging me to."

HONESTLY I DONT HAVE ANY WORDS

THIS IS JUST PERFECT IN SO MANY WAYS AND I LOVE IT SO MUCH

"You look like a present, all wrapped up so prettily. Or are you a puppy with your pretty red bow?" You teased her, voice dropping to a purr and effectively bringing a flush to Alma's neck that crept slowly up to her face. You leaned down a bit closer and murmured "The question is, who gets to unwrap you?" with a smirk, eyes dropping to Alma's lips for a moment, parted with surprise.

aaaaaaaAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAA

"Well that all depends on who wants me, doesn't it?"

AAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAA

ALMA!!!

So you breathed "I may have an idea of who that could be," unconsciously licking your lips, which inevitably caught Alma's gaze, cobalt eyes focused on scarlet.

AGAIN

NO WORDS

DONT MIND ME SCREAMING INTO A PILLOW BECAUSE OMG THIS IS GLORIOUS

They stayed there for quite some time, the ymbryne not quite able to respond until she finally managed to choke "Who do you have in mind?" Your smirk twitched up a bit further, and Alma just had time to look back to your eyes before you had replied "Me," and finally brought your lips to hers. The suddenness took Alma's breath away and she instinctually leaned up on her heels, trying to get closer to you with you still firmly keeping her head in place by her jaw. The kiss was tender but left both of you breathless as well as speechless; though you weren't planning on talking with your lips still very much preoccupied. Neither of you were willing to break the kiss, even as the angle began to get slightly uncomfortable, and your free hand absently fiddled with the bow at Alma's neck, running your thumb across the silky material and up to the woman's jaw, where you traced the length of the bone. Finally though, you did have to breathe, so you pulled back a few inches, letting go of Alma's chin but still running your thumb against her jaw affectionately. The look in her eyes was overflowing with fondness, and she went to say something.

jsbdjhcbsdKJBDVHSBDCKSNDOCIBSWCJHADHVBCJAEORFVBOHADVCJHVASDCBAJCD JHVADWCVALWDCJLVHBADUFYVOIWEKJF VJDFVUASBDPVJSDLJC AHSDBCPIAJVJHASDVHCBwj flhqoyefapejfvKJIFBVPIFDIPVUAPEIRBVPAIHDFBVOAEBFVPHAEROF

DHBDCBHDCHBcjhbshDBCBSDC

DYING

DEAD

IM DEAD

ITS FINE

aAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAA

THIS IS SO FUCKING ADORABLE AND FOR WHAT?? JUST TO MAKE ME SCREAM?? PROBABLY AND YOU KNOW WHAT?? IM OKAY WITH THAT

DUDE YOUR WRITING SKILLS ARE JUST BEYOND

THEY’RE SIMPLY UNPARALLELED

I LOVE EVERYTHING ABOUT THIS <3333

But before she could, the shouts of excited children entered the room, followed by grinning teenagers, and you knew exactly who had put Alma in this position. You almost wanted to reprimand them for making her uncomfortable, but you also knew that without this little push you most likely wouldn't have ended up where you are now.

<333333333333333333

The blonde nodded, clearly not ashamed in the least, and the others also piped in with admittances of guilt.

I love those kids so much

After a moment of silence, you gave them an expectant look and gestured behind you to the other, non-human presents, and instantly the kids were in motion, crowding around your legs and falling to the floor looking for their respective gifts.

“Non-human presents” LMAO

As soon as the headmistress had disappeared, Emma approached you with a small smile. "Took you long enough," she said, and you rolled your eyes. "How did you even come up with this?" you asked instead of scolding her, and the blonde replied "Well, we heard you listening to that one song on repeat and decided we'd, you know," she laughs quietly, "Take a hint from it." You knew what song she was speaking of almost immediately and stated "You're all I need underneath the tree," dumbfounded at their cleverness.

SMART KIDDOS <3333

"You know, I've got a present for you too," you mumbled, resting your chin on her shoulder.

I love the image of someones chin resting on the other persons shoulder, its just so impossibly sweet <33

The ravenette hummed in interest, continuing to work but responding with "And what might that be, darling?" You laughed airily and exclaimed "Well I can't tell you! Then it wouldn't be a gift!"

Cuties omg

"Are you planning on taking that off? Or do I get the honor of opening this present?" You breathed, slipping behind her and wrapping your arms around her waist. Warm breath fluttered against Alma's skin and sent shivers down her spine, the double meaning not lost on her in the slightest. As you placed gentle kisses against her neck, the woman shakily replied "Who gave you the idea that you get to do such a thing?" Her voice wavered as she spoke and you waited patiently as she continued; "Haven't you heard of 'you can look, but you can't touch'?"

ABSCABDIUBADCNAKSC

O-OKAY ALMA

Though Alma's heart was nearly beating out of her ribcage she still managed a playful smile, one which would no doubt be wiped from her face soon enough, and replied "But you look so wonderful when you're frustrated."

OOOOOOOOOO

well practiced and honestly putting her own skill to shame--in the best way of course–

LMAO ALMA <3

I love her so much omg

playing on loop in her mind and occasionally spilling from her lips as you lavished her neck with attention, finally pulling the bow's tails and undoing the knot, letting it hang across her shoulders. It's ruby red a sharp contrast to her navy jacket, you absently registered that's what had been in Horace's dream last night. Still you didn't think about it too much as Alma pulled you back to her lips before she could let a too-loud noise pass them, the borderline moan instead felt against your lips.

1) OMG

2) the ribbon!!!!

3) OMG

4) I LOVE THIS SCENE AAAAA

You spoke her own name against pale, burning skin, orisons of worship to the woman you love. And when you finally had to stop, when you at last removed your lips from Alma's, still you repeated benedictions like it was your last day alive, like Alma was the only one who could save you.

Ive said it probably 1,000 times and i will say it 100000 more times but HOLY SHIT YOUR WRITING IS SO DAMN GOOD

The way that you string words together and mould them so that they form these delicate, beautiful, delicious sentences is simply extraordinary. You have so much skill, and it really shows. You clearly know and care about your characters and when you suddenly get sentences like these– ugh. It’s just gorgeous. <333

The woman whined when you removed your lips from hers and tried to lean forward and catch them again, somehow completely abandoning her natural tendency to keep a tight schedule.

Cutie pie <3

No but seriously alma is so adorable

You weren't very good at it though, not nearly as good as Alma, but luckily she got the hint quick enough and shook herself out of her daze, clearing her throat and snatching her time piece from your hand, checking it herself.

Look at them working together again omg

This ending paragraph is adorable, seriously

It only took a glimpse of the hands to have her stating "We have seven minutes and thirteen seconds to finish breakfast." You nodded, and let her up with no more than a quick peck to her cheek, still warm to the touch. It took Alma a moment longer to fully collect herself, but after taking a deep breath, closing her eyes tightly, she snapped into action, back to her usual self (mostly). And as she worked, stealing the occasional kiss here and there, the ymbryne couldn't think of a better way to start Christmas.

ASCANSOCIABSCHJLSDHVCLS D I LOVE THEMMMMMMMM

THIS IS SUCH A GOOD ENDING TO A BEAUTIFUL STORY

I LOVE IT SO MUCH <33333333

OKAY SO OVERALL: one of the best christmas fanfics ive ever read (but honestly who’s surprised bc its you who wrote it)! Alma and y/n are just so adorable together. I love how they work as a team, even sometimes without realizing it, and are able to be so casually intimate with each other. That is something that takes time and trust to build up to, i think, especially for alma. I feel like a lot of the time we see her as a strict, kinda frigid (idk if that is the correct word for what i'm trying to describe but imma use it anyway cuz im too lazy to think of another one lol) and closed off woman, who clearly cares for her children but has a wall built up for some reason. (I may be completely wrong but whatever.) but the way that you describe her and y/n’s relationship is calm, quiet, teasing and intimate in a way that makes them seem like they’ve been married for 50-some years, while also keeping that spark that they have bright and new. y/n is able to crack open alma’s shell and get her out of her own head. Basically what i’m trying to say is that the way you write these two characters is AMAZING and I love you so much<333 keep writing because the world deserves to hear what you have to say

Help your reviews continue to leave me breathless 😭😭

Legit squealed in excitement when I realized you'd sent this tyhgrfdcs

BUT thank you my love!!!! ughhh never stop doing what you do 🥺💖💖💖

I do care about my writing and characterizations, the biggest reason as to why I don't post often is because, even if I've finished the story, I'll go back and read and reread every action and piece of dialogue from characters just to make sure it's perfect. Very time-consuming, but completely worth it if it continues to earn me such wonderful feedback like yours 🥺💖

#ask #petit etoile <3 #fic review

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theendofeverafter · 4 years

Text

My personal Ever After High ships

No one asked but I’m doing this anyway. Here are my own EA ships. Maybe I’ll make a separate page or something on my tumblr to list them (idk the lingo here haha). I’ll include my anti-ships at the bottom because there are some I’m personally really opposed to.

In no particular order:

SHIPS

Darling Charming x Holly O’Hair - This is probably my one of my all-time favorites. Was there sufficient interaction in the show? Hell no, they spoke to each other one (1) time on camera. But they’re perfect for each other, I swear. Darling is a knight in shining armor, and Holly has always dreamed of the whole Prince Charming thing or whatever. She writes fanfiction about it, for chrissakes. Darling can be that for her. Plus, I’ve always pictured Holly as liking girls (no matter what she said in Thronecoming lol). Appling/Dapple is nice, but I think Darling can do better than Apple.

Raven Queen x Dexter Charming - One of the only canon ships, but a good one nonetheless. I really like them together. I forgot which post spelled it out on here, but someone else said that Dexter serves as the privileged, down-to-earth guy who feels misunderstood by his family, while Raven is the rebellious girl from the “wrong side of the tracks”. Even though Raven is still wealthy as the daughter of a king and queen, she’s still an outcast. I love that kind of pairing! Dex is one of the only non-Rebels to treat Raven like a real person. Raven teaches Dex how to color outside of the lines. I think they’re a good match for each other.

Lizzie Hearts x Daring Charming - No, I will not be swayed on this. Lizzie and Daring were the OG ship and another CANON pairing. Let’s dissect: Daring is dared by his friends to get a date with her. She has high standards (as she should) and doesn’t give him the time of day. He has to prove himself to her, not use cheap tricks to get her attention. After he takes her on an adventure (getting her out of her comfort zone), she warms up to him. Then she asks him to keep their date a secret, and he does! He takes the dare’s consequence on the chin to protect her reputation. This is honestly out of character for him, which is why I’m hyping up this otherwise bare-minimum act. This friendship continues into the books, as they interact a lot in A Wonderlandiful World. Lizzie and Daring complement each other, too: she’s a responsible, dedicated princess who never loses sight of what’s important. He’s a fun-loving prince who revels in public admiration. Lizzie can teach him to be more responsible while Daring can teach her to relax and have fun.

Ashlynn Ella x Hunter Huntsman - Not much needs to be said. Ashlynn has a vegan cheerleader significant other and you don’t. Jealous? I know I am.

Kitty Cheshire x Ramona Badwolf - She was a werecat, she was a werewolf. Can I make it any more obvious? They’re both snarky and mischievous. Plus, Kitty would have a chance to redeem herself after almost outing Cerise and her family.

Briar Beauty x Hopper Croakington II - I’m so sorry for all the straight ships :( I promise the sequel to The End of Ever After will NOT be as straight as EAH. Anyway, Briar and Hopper have so much potential. You can tell that Briar has warmed up to him throughout the series. First it was her turning him down and being grossed out by his frogginess. Then she enlists his help with the True Hearts Day dance (though I have a hunch that this was all thanks to Cupid). Then she tolerates his existence at Spring Fairest (and even saves him from being blown away on the Fairest Wheel). Then she enlists his help again with the recreation spell in Epic Winter. She likes him, people! I think Hopper is a really nice guy and a perfect love interest for Briar, who deserves everything in the world.

Duchess Swan x Sparrow Hood - I will die on this hill. They’re together in the *show* and I can prove it. After they “break up” in True Hearts Day (they were just friends then), you see them in the background together all the time. In Epic Winter, they were together when they were spying on Grimm. Why do they spend so much time together? Are they just friends? Or is there something going on between them? I think the second is much more likely. I love their dynamic and wish it was explored more in the show. Also, someone has pointed out that Sparrow’s necklace is the same shape as Duchess’s earrings. This can’t be a coincidence.

Chase Redford x Justine Dancer - I’ll admit it, this ship came out of nowhere for me. It is entirely based on the fact that I think they’d look good together. Ramona/Justine shippers are entirely valid.

Jillian Beanstalk x Lilly-Bo Peep - My final wlw relationship, unfortunately. I feel like Lilly-Bo is a girl who wants to go on adventures, but can’t because of her needy sheep. Seriously, those animals are constantly crying for her attention. Jillian is freewheeling and can help Lilly-Bo chase her dreams.

Alistair Wonderland x Bunny Blanc - The two most boring Wonderlandians deserve each other. Mattel screwed ‘em up badly. Chase/Alistair shippers are valid as well b/c I don’t even know with these two. I guess I like that they’re such close friends? And that they can’t tell that the other person has a crush on them? Who knows.

Nina Thumbell x Humphrey Dumpty - This is another wtf ship. I headcannon these two as being a year younger than the main EAH characters, and I think they’d be cute together, so it’s a ship. No questions please.

The rest of the characters will either find people outside the school to date or not date anyone at all (yes, I’ve headcannoned Cedar as asexual and aromantic, even as a “real girl”).

ANTI-SHIPS

Raven Queen x Apple White - I think @rebelliouslyeverafter had a great post on this. I’ll link it here.

Rosabella Charming x Daring Charming - This is a personal preference since I’m a hardcore Dizzie shipper. I cringe every time I watch Epic Winter because the show pretended like Daring and Lizzie weren’t romantically involved. There’s nothing wrong with the ship inherently, but I much prefer Daring being the Beast but not in love with Rosabella.

Cerise Hood x Daring Charming - Same reasonings as above, but there’s even less material to refer to with this ship (in my opinion).

Duchess Swan x Poppy O’Hair - Why.

All other ships are fine to me, even if I don’t agree with them myself. And of course, you’re free to ship whomever you like. These are just my preferences.

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mrs-nate-humphrey · 3 years

Note

you’ve talked a little bit about this wrt dan, but i’m curious: what are your favorite seasons/arcs for the main gg characters? (serena, blair, dan, nate, jenny, vanessa) cause everyone’s personalities tended to uh, shift a bit from season to season and storyline to storyline, and i’m wondering which eras of those characters were your favorite?

oh, so i sat on this question for a very long time, and spent a ton of time thinking over it. here we go!

i loved the way serena was written in s1 and s2. she was so full of joy despite all the difficult things she’d endured, so bubbly and warm and... lively is ALWAYS the adjective that comes to mind for serena, despite how it’s a terrible pun. but yeah! she had an energy to her that was very childlike & genuine, and i loved that about her - despite the things she’d endured, she was so full of light (?? how do i describe this.) i know that serena’s arc gets notably more tragic s3 onwards, but i feel like the way she was written lost a bit of depth s3 onwards as well. she had a sharp wit, and a good sense of humour, she was playful and... most notably, she had this little giggle? that she literally NEVER does in the later seasons, which makes me sad?? she stopped laughing like a child at the age of, what, 19?? idk. in s1 & s2 serena had so many layers, and i feel like as the seasons went on they tried to, uh. keep only the surface layers? they didn’t really do justice to the character they started out with.

my answer for vanessa is actually the exact same, with slight modifications. vanessa’s energy in s1 and s2 was unparalleled. literally the best. i loved her and the way she was critical of everything and YET so ready to learn. compared to all these rich, privileged, white people... her presence was just SO good and so important to me, because the way she was so critical of the uber rich was something nobody else really was, and i think that perspective WAS valuable and should’ve remained, haha. idk what it was about s3, but i feel like they didn’t keep the crux of who vanessa was? it wasn’t a BAD vanessa season as much as an incomplete one. i felt they could’ve done so much more with a character like vanessa.... she’s so vibrant and full of life! and the way s3 was for her was very surface. and then in s4 they just demolished her character entirely. i’ve said it before, i’ll say it again: what jenny, juliet and vanessa did in 4x09 was TOTALLY out of character for vanessa. she would never, ever do that. and by the time s4 came around... someone else said this, i don’t remember who. but they said that vanessa was basically being used as a plot device more than as a character. notice how she’s always in the right place at the right time to overhear the right thing? it’s a travesty, because vanessa was just..... so significant to me. like her being there added so much value & even changed the tone of the show imo.

my blair feelings are very complicated. i think she’s fascinating, and i love leighton & her performance. i love book blair so much more than show blair, and idk why or how to explain it. i mentioned this in that post where i ranked the characters, but while watching blair in high school specifically i can’t EVER forget that she would probably hatecrime me, and even when she’s out of school she is still supremely racist at times. i actually liked blair best in s5 - and i know she was going thru ~tragic~ stuff (i think they dialled the tragedy too high actually, like, blair had TOO MUCH on her plate and from a storytelling point of view it was... ambitious, to say the least, to hope to bring all out of that out on tv) but like, keeping her tragedy aside. her capacity for kindness and care really shone thru while she was with dan, and i liked how the d/b relationship took her out of her comfort zone and her “but im a Waldorf!” bubble and let her, idk, be a person. i liked her in s4, too. i feel like blair is a really good, nuanced, fleshed out character as blair, and the way she clung to being a waldorf combined with her rich-white-girl privilege got kind of boring after a while because like. she’s not like louis? her character has so much depth. her character doesn’t need to be reduced to a title, because she’s SO much more than that.

i feel like i need to do a lot more rewatching when it comes to dan because i CANNOT be objective about him. he reminds me far too much of myself!!! down to his flaws and his mistakes and his issues – i was a precocious little shit in high school at times in very similar ways to dan, i like to think i’ve grown out of that (& am perpetually making an effort TO grow out of falling into those patterns) & that’s what i want for dan, too. dan’s arc feels real to me, because a lot of it is my arc, too. feeling lonely, out of place & unaccepted in high school --> being a popular kid in college… that hits really close to home. s1 & s2 are important seasons to me because i’m extremely protective of awkward, trying-his-best high school dan (he can be awful at times, but he can be earnest and sincere, too!) i feel like s4 is actually the best dan season – took me a while to get here, but halfway thru my s2 rewatch that’s how i’m leaning. but dan’s arc was very interesting to me, and i wish they’d kept his heart. trying to retcon him as evil fell absolutely flat to me, like. who are you convincing! one of my friends and i were joking about how georgie blackmailed dan into pretending to be gossip girl (she obviously has dirt on him that nobody else does.) anyway. dan’s arc felt pretty true until the end of s4. i wasn’t a big fan of how he was written in s5, i felt like something had been taken away from his character, but i don’t know how to say it better. you’re right though, i have gone over this a lot! so i’m not going to break my head over it, ‘cause we’re already a thousand words in and i still have nate and jenny to go.

speaking of jenny, though: i think dan’s storylines REALLY needed more of a big brother arc. the way he was characterised, especially in s1, was very “i would kill a man for my baby sister” and i have NO idea where that went or why they got rid of it. (actually, i do have some idea. fucking chip wiskers apologism & elevation of chair over literally anything else. sigh)

okay, now speaking of jenny in terms of jenny. i liked her s1 arc, like, her trying to make friends with these people & trying to keep her morals and realising she can’t do both was interesting. i think that should’ve been that with her clashes with girls in constance, though. and afterwards, either nothing happens, or she transfers out of constance, etc. jenny’s s2 arc makes me sad – she was exploited and treated like dirt in so many ways :( the jenny/agnes was interesting in s2, though, and there’s no way to interpret it that ISN’T lesbian. i’ve always felt like jenny’s feelings for nate in s2 are very comphet. jenny’s s3 arc made me even sadder than her s2 arc- she was alienating all her friends one by one, making everyone hate her, and just…… spiralling. she really needed a better support system. her s4 arc made no sense. like. why did she come back in the city to fuck with serena like that? it didn’t feel right.

yeah, all that said… i feel like there are many super intriguing elements of jenny’s storylines and arcs, like, even within canon events if things had been executed differently, it could’ve been actually good/empowering. but the writers hated jenny. and this show was never a feminist show.

ah, so… nate. he started out as a flake in s1 & s2. that’s his whole thing. he doesn’t know who he wants to be / how to get what he wants / how to get where he wants. he takes people for granted. he isn’t dependable or reliable, he lets people down (most notably, blair & vanessa.) and he means well, sure! but his life is like amber and he’s trapped in it. he doesn’t follow his heart, he’s too busy trying to please the wrong people, etc etc. in s3 he’s suddenly so ready for commitment, which always breaks my heart because vanessa!!! but anyway. s3 has a shift in his character, possibly him getting dumped at prom and realising that high school is over and one thing that tethered him to his family (being a kid, being a high schooler, being a minor, whatever) – one big thing that held him there is gone. so it makes sense that he starts trying to be his own person. i like s3 nate, and s4 nate. we see nate sort of gradually try and be a moral compass, and it’s interesting to me. when i write d/n fic something i really focus on is dan finding nate dependable, and i think that’s a value that builds in nate over time. nate of season 1 is not dependable, nope, no way. but nate of s4 seems like a decent friend to have. in s5 and s6 they more or less threw his entire arc to the wind and gave him so many shitty storylines (sage spence, wtf? nate would not do this. he’s been on the opposite end of this before, he would not carry the pattern forward, ffs.)

idk. this almost hit 1.7k, LMAO. i hope it made some amount of sense!

#anon #this is long enough to be a fanfic LMAOO #meta

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merinnan · 4 years

Text

Time Raiders

Okay, pausing the DMBJ 2 watches to watch the Time Raiders movie instead! I've been told that the entire movie is basically one big crackfic & I want to see how true that is

- Apparently the only place I can find it is YouTube

- And we open with someone laying down cards which...seem to be making a qilin pattern. Okay.

- And now we're at the Himalayas, and it seems to be a bunch of white soldiers shooting people?

- Oh, this leader white guy has a classic villain look. I love the pocket watch, too

- Wait, he's supposed to be a scientist?

- He obviously hasn't read the Evil Overload Handbook

- And now this is giving me flashbacks to Xiaoge's first appearance in DMBJ1

- Ah, yes, I think this is the Xiaoge for this movie. Excellent.

- DUDES. You have GUNS. You were using them just before. Why are you now using knives only?

- I mean, it wouldn't do much better, because Xiaoge, but still

- This is A Look

- Finally, one of them uses a gun, and it's as useless as I expected it would be

- Ahahahah, omg, what he did to these two guys is hilarious

- That is a TERRIBLE hiding place

- Don't....don't leave him alive. JFC

- This flashback montage is super weird

- Look, I don't have a tattoo myself, but I'm pretty sure that that's not how you get tattoos

- And now we move to Wushanju

- Oh, I think it's Sanshu who's been playing with those cards

- ...you have got to be kidding me

- Really? We're really doing this?

- I guess this is Wu Xie, then

- What even did he just randomly put that mask on for

- That is NOT a newborn

- Awww, kid Wu Xie

- Yay, creepy old houses. And ofc kid Wu Xie is gonna try to get inside

- But that is a fucking massive lock

- Yes, of course, wrap the porch in giant fuckoff chains, but don't lock the front door. Why not?

- ....k

- Sure, that happened

- And bratty kid Wu Xie still pinched one of the medallions after all of that

- Okay, yeah, if you were a kid who had to go to a funeral every month, no wonder you'd be so bored at them

- This movie is all over the place in terms of timeline

- I think we're finally into the time period of the main story

- And it seems this one also has Wu Xie as having been an architecture student of some kind

- Oh, yes, that's exactly what you want to find while crawling through a tunnel

- WX: "Sanshu can never know about this. You didn't tell him, right?"

WM: *oh shit I'm screwed face*

- Hi Sanshu, I wonder how you got here

- I love that no matter what version it is, Wu Xie is a little shit XD

- ...Wu Xie. Moths. Light. No.

- Wu Xie gonna Wu Xie

- Wu Xie, what are you doing?

- OMG

- Sanshu, this is all your fault for never letting him in anything like this. He doesn't know not to touch

- Wow, that wasn't subtle at all

- That's some steampunky looking villain lair right there

- I love how the 'passerby video' getting screened fucking everywhere is just the movie footage of that scene XD That's some high quality passerby video with interesting angles

- That's an interesting drinking spot, Xiaoge

- I love that so far Wu Xie's instincts for everything is either 'touch it', 'wear it', or 'dismantle it'

- ....okay

- Yeah, I....I think this is going to be my reaction to most of the movie, tbh

- Although at least this whole magic Snake Empress and weird ancient technology/magic thing is more interesting than the bland het palace drama randomly dropped into the middle of DMBJ1

- Oh, finally, some product placement

- I was wondering what was taking it so long

- I love how all their desks and papers and such are inside what look like coffins, and then fold out

- Oh look, Xiaoge's sword is inside one of the coffins.

- And there's Xiaoge

- Hei Ye gave Sanshu the sword decades ago?

- lol, this is like some Sword in the Stone bullshit right here

- I love it

- a) Was all that really necessary

- b) wtf even is that sword?

- It's a really bizarre design, and surely being able to be moved like a mechanical device would weaken it?

- ...okay, that was a cute meeting, I'll give it that

- Love how the older guys are teasing Wu Xie in the truck here.

- Oh, Wu Xie's actually a psych student in this one

- And like, Wu Xie, how do you know Xiaoge was looking at his reflection. It's a window, he might have just been spacing out at the scenery

- You must have been paying a lot of attention to him to notice it was the reflection he was actually looking at, hmmm? 👀

- This is a cute Wu Xie, tho

- Yes, Wu Xie, despite your lack of modesty there I totally caught that you just called Xiaoge handsome

- WU XIE WHAT NO DON'T DO THAT

- Hahaha, Xiaoge had exactly the same reaction

- No, Wu Xie, it doesn't matter that you'd taken the ammo out, you should never stick the barrel of a gun in your face and look down it like that.

- Even if you're certain it's unloaded, you just DON'T DO THAT

- Wu Xie, lacking impulse control and survival instincts without Xiaoge and Pangzi since....forever

- (okay, lacking survival instincts was perhaps a bit too far, but still)

- I love Xiaoge's "omg what even are you" look at that

- This is a very talkative and open to talking about himself Xiaoge

- It's kind of weird

- lol @ Sanshu locking Wu Xie in the truck so he can't come with them

- I mean, really, does he actually expect this to work?

- He knows his nephew both likes and is good at taking things apart, after all

- lol, I knew it

- Oh

- Oh, that's not a good sign

- Even Coral's logo just screams 'villainous organisation'

- These mercenaries look like video game characters from like COD or something

- Oh hi, lady I presume is A-Ning

- I like the haircut. Looks kinda like DMBJ 1 Xiaoge's haircut, just with the fringe over the opposite eye

- Oh, there's that gratuitous boob shot that @thosch3i told me about

- I really don't see why it was necessary for A-Ning to crawl all over the truck like that when everyone else just walked past it

- There is some really nice scenery in this movie with all the mountains and cliffs and such

- "What I'm doing isn't about right or wrong, it's about how much" I like this A-Ning. She is refreshingly direct and mercenary

- Damn, I though Xiaoge was going to notice the drone. I mean, it's so close to them! He should notice it!

- Love Hendrix's surprised Pikachu face at recognising him, though

- I'm honestly surprised that none of them have looked in the truck at all

- I do appreciate that this movie doesn't even attempt to pretend that they're not tomb raiders

- And that they have no interest in preserving this place

- Because BOOM! Let's just dynamite our way in and destroy half the wall

- Oops, no floor there

- Hahaha, this tomb is a fucking platform game

- Lovely, a shootout in a tomb. Just what every good tomb raiding movie need

- lol, Sanshu

- Don't you ever ever again wonder where your nephew's little shit tendencies come from

- I think Xiaoge and A-Ning are the only truly competent people on their respective teams

- A-Ning, 'keep them alive' does not mean 'try to shoot one in the face at close range'

- That little boot knife is kinda cute, though

- Clever move, Pan Zi

- I love the Xiaoge/A-Ning fight. He really is the only one who could keep her distracted

- I'm impressed at how well she held her own with him

- IDK why he was holding back

- Also, Xiaoge participating in fight banter, no matter how minimal? Strange, but also kinda cool.

- I'm going to be giggling about that "Not bad"/"I know" for awhile, I think

- IDK how they had the time or the ability to stay still long enough to rig up that trap, I'm impressed

- lol, yeah, I didn't think that it would take Wu Xie long to get out of the truck

- I take back my earlier comment about it being too harsh to say that Wu Xie lacks survival instincts without Xiaoge and Pangzi around

- Wu Xie, there is not enough light down here for you to get good shots without your flash being on

- I know having your flash on is a BAD idea, but still

- You cannot be getting good photos in this light

- Why is Xiaoge separated from everyone? He jumped down with them

- I mean, it's good that he is, otherwise Wu Xie would be kinda screwed right now

- Huh, bats, there must be an actual entrance to this tomb, not just the one that Sanshu's team made.

- A-Ning's tiny baby drones are so cute

- The English dubbing in this is surprisingly good compared to the shows

- Yes, good, the staring is starting

- ...Wu Xie, you little shit

- He's so pleased with himself

- Xiaoge is so confused until he explains it

- OMG, a Xiaoge smile

- OMG A XIAOGE LAUGH

- Ah yes, multiple large tornadoes, a way to signify weird shit is going now

- And weird spinny planets forming an...energy grid of some kind?

- ...k

- The mini drones apparently only pick up on people who are part of A-Ning's team, I guess

- JESUS

- I mean, I had a strong suspicion that was gonna happen, but it still made me jump

- Xiaoge to the rescue!

- Damn, that sword is strong

- This tomb definitely has a spider colony, but given it also has a bat colony that doesn't surprise me

- Those are some creepy looking mannequins

- This set up looks like a game of Mouse Trap

- A game of Mouse Trap with fire

- That's actually a really cool way to light all the candles and lamps

- I'm impressed that none of the cobwebs have caught on fire

- Oh, so NOW you use your flash, Wu Xie. When the room is all well lit and you don't actually need it

- CREEEEEPY

- Wu Xie and his compulsive need to touch things

- Are all the puppets connected somehow, or are we gonna have spooky magical shit making them all come to life?

- Oh, the puppet band is like the bells, I guess

- Huh, it seems Wu Xie's the only one who got thrown into memories in these illusions, everyone else's hallucination still has them inside the tomb

- wtf, a lion is a weird thing to hallucinate

- Magic Zhang blood, go!

- IDK why he needs to cut himself for each person, though, surely one cut should be enough to get all the drops of blood he needs

- Good boy, Wu Xie, already so protective of his Xiaoge

- This really is a fucking platform game

- Guys, this is why you study up on the raid mechanics BEFORE you enter the instance

- Ahahahah, the music playing as Wu Xie basically dances with the sword trap

- lol, the look on Xiaoge's face as he realises Wu Xie is just...fucking dancing and taking photos

- And that it's WORKING

- OMFG, this is basically just a bizarre dance sequence

- I love it

- It's so stupid

- The puppets having fucking crossbows

- Because ofc they do

- Repeating crossbows

- ...k

- So now we have a room full of skeletons stuffed into cages

- Why not

- Ah, we're about to have bugs show up

- Excellent

- This is what I've been waiting for

- Let the hilarity begin continue

- Dude, you can quit right now as much as you like, but it doesn't mean you're going to be able to get out of here by yourself

- I guess this guy's gonna die now

- For the tropes are hungry and must be fed

- Much like the bugs

- Yep, here we go

- Hello, shibie, I've been expecting you

- These ones don't look as cartoonishly ridiculous as the ones in DMBJ 1, I'm sad

- OMFG, it's eating the shovel/pick/thing

- Okay, this is a good effort at cartoonish ridiculousness

- It's a lovely day in the tomb, and these are horrible shibie

- Poor Wu Xie, so shocked at getting slapped

- And yeah. Yeah, that's about the only thing you can do there.

- Only way to save the guy is to just give him a quick death so he doesn't suffer from being eaten alive

- They're lucky these shibie move so slowly. It gives them plenty of time to climb up onto those frames

- lol, weird bendy sword again

- Wow, good catch, Wu Xie

- Y'know, Wu Xie, it might have been more useful to give the knife to Da Kui

- And ofc Wu Xie falls down

- What is a DMBJ adaptation without Wu Xie getting himself into danger like this?

- That was so much wtf all at once

- First, an unbroken flute just, like, laying there on the ground

- Then, Wu Xie somehow thinking that playing it would save him from the bugs

- Then that WORKED

- He's like the fucking Pied Piper of the shibie

- What even is this movie

- Haha, the little OK sign he flashes at Xiaoge

- The wtf look on Xiaoge's face

- Same, Xiaoge. Same

- I love how everyone just. Accepts it & congratulates Wu Xie on being an awesome flute player

- But then ig what else are you gonna do?

- It's like, well, this may as well happen

- Sanshu's team really likes using grenades, huh?

- Well, it does work pretty well!

- See, Wu Xie, this is when you need to summon your bugs back

- On a completely different tangent, I cannot get over how weirdly the subs translate men you ping. I had to look up wtf shtum was. I've never come across it before. Is it something more commonly used in the US or something?

- Xiaoge, when you said you had a better way than digging under the door, I didn't think you meant just BATTERING THE FUCKING DOOR WITH THE SHOVEL

- Oh, no, it's with your sword

- Because the best way to look after a sharp blade and keep it in good condition and keep a good edge is to...hack at rocks with it

- Ofc

- Why didn't I think of that?

- OK, ig fucking up your sword's edge did actually work, there's now a giant-ass hole in the door

- This is serious Day After Tomorrow vibes here

- Ah, yes, giant lightning strikes that cause so much force to travel through the earth that they can semi-collapse a tunnel deep underneath a mountain

- Just your usual tomb robbing dangers

- Physicists and meteorologists would have a fucking field day here

- Ah, I see we're at this level of the platform game

- With the collapsing floor you need to get across without falling

- Okay, that's really kinda sweet of Wu Xie here. He thinks he's likely to die, and the most important thing to him is giving Xiaoge the pictures he took of him so that he doesn't lose all his memories

- And aww, Xiaoge's so worried about him

- Like, I'm totally understanding why the transmigrated Wu Xie in that fic looked at these two and went "wow, we're so gay in this timeline"

- Even the music in this scene is shipping it

- Romantic line, and dramatic fall through the floor. Yep.

- I'm amazed he survived that fall, but it's Wu Xie, and he can't die

- ...yes, ancient Persian architecture totally had anachronistic technology. Sure. This is definitely like that

- omfg, they're statis chambers

- 2000 year old stasis chambers

- Guess they're not worried about catching Sanshu and his team to get the key anymore. They've been kinda sidetracked

- Side quests will do that

- ...plant golems

- "Don't shoot the thing that's in the process of murdering your friend! You might damage my research project!"

- Ew, that's not a nice death

- Yes, good girl, A-Ning

- That thing was just gonna kill your whole team otherwise

- ...how did that laptop survive the blast enough for Wu Xie to be using it with no problem

- That's one tough laptop

- Where do I get one?

- And hey, I guess the one Chinese guy with A-Ning isn't actually one of her people, since she just, like, left him there 🤣 In the room with a plant golem 🤣 That she then threw a grenade into 🤣

- ...omg, that's meant to be Pangzi?

- I was wondering why no Pangzi in the movie. I guess 3/4 of the way through isn't too late to properly intro him

- Ahahaha, Wu Xie actually thinks his bluff was super successful when there's a plant golem behind him

- Xiaoge to the rescue again XD

- lol @ both Pangzi and Wu Xie using Xiaoge's sword as a restraint

- ...surprise A-Ning! I wasn't expecting her to actually come back

- And she's somehow lost all of her guys

- That's a lot of snakes, but I'm more interested in where all the water is coming from and why you can see the sun behind those shelves

- Given how deep under a mountain they're supposed to be

- I do love competent, pretty girls wielding huge fuckoff guns

- This door mechanism is so intricate (like the key/timer). So ofc I'm sure they're going to destroy it all

- Because that's how tomb raiding movies go

- Introduce a tomb with intricate and complex mechanisms far in advance of anything else known to that time period and civilisation, and then destroy them in dramatic fight and escape scenes

- OMG the floor is lava

- Of course there's lava as well

- Oh, and it seems it's now all open to the sky

- Ig the lightning which could mysteriously exert high levels of force must have smashed through the mountain and very neatly cleared it all way so that this part of the tomb and only this part of the tomb is now open air

- Wang Zanghai wishes he could go this extra with tomb building

- And now Xiaoge being super extra to get across the destroyed section of the bridge

- So this dude is gonna wake up just before Xiaoge gets there, isn't he?

- And we're going to get an epic swordfight between them

- At least, it better be an epic swordfight

- Otherwise this buildup will be very disappointing

- Ah, yes, good, there we go

- And all the plant golems are also waking up

- ...along with a shitton of snakes

- OMG the snakes have arms

- The snakes

- have arms

- OMG Xiaoge's sword is doing what now?

- That's almost as ridiculous as the snakes with arms

- It's like a sword designed by a 13 year old weeaboo boy

"it's gonna be ancient, and super strong, and nothing will ever make it blunt"

"okay, seems like a typical magic sword so far, that's fair"

"and you can bend it at right angles"

"...you can what"

"and when it's bent at right angles, you can make it spin really fast and still use it like a proper sword"

"...it what"

- ...the Snake Empress is reforming in her armour as thousands of little vines all coming together

- k

- Sure

- This may as well happen

- And her armour has boobplate, because ofc it does

- Oh, she ain’t happy that Xiaoge just killed her plant golem boyfriend

- Her aesthetics are hilarious

- It's part Queen of the Damned, part Little Shop of Horrors

- Okay, snake lady, your worms might change the world but honestly I think that lightning would be more effective if you could control it

- Sanshu and co just randomly walk in through another entrance

- Oh, and there's the rest of A-Ning's team

- I want the story behind this A-Ning and her team. The way they all call her captain, and follow her without a second word, and are so genuinely happy to see her. This isn't just a throw-together team, or a team that Hendrix put together and put her in charge of. This is her team, and there's an obvious history between them

- And snake lady is suddenly not looking as pretty as she was, for no discernible reason

- One minute she's jumping around, the next she's all pale and falling apart. At least her face is

- It's like she's decomposing throughout the fight

- And here come the snakes with arms

- They move just as slowly as the shibie in here do

- They jump pretty fast, though

- RIP the next member of Sanshu's team

- Yeah, machine guns aren't that effective against regular snakes, let alone magic snakes

- And the plant golems are here

- RIP more of Sanshu's team

- Ah, the little snakes with arms are all grown up and off to conquer the world

- ...omfg Pangzi

- And this time it's A-Ning to the rescue

- I love how quickly Wu Xie and Pangzi fall into the dynamic of a pair of clowns, regardless of adaptation

- RIP Harry. You went out like a badass

- Oh wow, both teams are having some fucking epic sacrificial deaths in this fight scene

- I like

- And more cute pingxie, this time in flashbacks

- lol, clearing out plant golem conversion by pure force of will

- ...and channeling blood down the grooves in the sword blade apparently...makes it sharper?

- At least, it couldn't cut through the vines before, and now it can

- That's not how magnetic fields work

- Ahahaha, Wu Xie pulling out his flute

- He's gonna pull that Pied Piper shit again, isn't he?

- Here come the shibie, come to nom on plant-snake-lady flesh!

- She's having just as much trouble with them as everyone else does

- Because it's a lovely day in the tomb, and they are horrible shibie

- Wow, she hits hard, she knocked Xiaoge like halfway across the chasm

- Good thing there was a random broken pillar there

- Are they getting obliterated?

- Ah, no, they're getting sucked up by the wind

- Shibie-nado!

- You know, I kinda like how bad Wu Xie's English is compared to everyone else who's spoken English so far

- It nicely demonstrates who speaks it a lot and who doesn't

- Aw, Wu Xie, you're always so optimistic when you're baby

- And it actually worked. I'm impressed.

- Oh wow, A-Ning, that's some character development right there, caring about right or wrong instead of money

- Nice Pangi & A-Ning dynamic in this movie, given how they usually hate each other

- This is definitely the final level of a platform game

- Hahah, the two teams now

- Awwwwwwww 😭

- I think this is the first time I've seen Wu Xie rescue Xiaoge rather than vice versa

- "I regret not locking you in the truck myself"

- Sorry, Xiaoge, I don't think you'd actually have much more luck with that than Sanshu did

- Xiaoge, you really should have been more careful there, you almost did low Wu Xie

- Good thing A-Ning was close by!

- ....the sword...is being used...as a boomerang

- wtaf

- Hahahah, the snakes' death throes, omg

- lol what even was that ending

Overall: This movie was just one long DMBJ PingXie AU crackfic, and the author didn't know how to end it so just...didn't write an actual ending. That's the only way I can explain it.

#dmbj #daomu biji #time raiders

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lailarain · 3 years

Text

Warning: Spoilers for Danganronpa: The End of Hope's Peak High School:Despair Arc

(I'm watching for the first time)

We're back at it again, guys!

Also, yes, I've realized that I porbably should've watched Danganronpa 2.5 first, but I'll do that after Despair Arc

Episode 1:

Oh it's ponytail teacher lady🙂

NEW INTRO YEAH BABY

POTHEAD GUY I MISSED YOUUUU

FUYUHIKO, SONIA, MAHIRU, AND HIYOKO THE NOSTALGIAAAAAA

I'm only a few minutes in and I'm already dying of laughter from the dialogue😭

MIKAN I MISSED YOU

This ponytail teacher lady, istg😂😂😂😂😂

THE TEACHER HAS A BLADE WHY DOES THE TEACHER HAVE A BLADE

Okay where is Nagito he's the only reason I'm watching this🙄

"oH goD jUrAsSiC pArK"

IS THAT WHO I THINK IT IS?

NEKOMARUUUU

Isn't that that one pervy chef?

Teruteru, that's pretty gay😀

AKANE HELLOOOOO

Soda the simp has arrived

GUNDHAM YES I MISS YOU SO MUCH😭😭😭😭

IBUKI MY GIRL

PEKO WHY'D YOU HAVE TO DIE I MISSED YOUUUU

NAGITO NAGITO NAGITO NAGITO NAGITO NAGITO NAGITO NAGITO NAGITO NAGITO NAGITO NAGITO NAGITO NAGITO NAGITO NAGITO NAGITO NAGITO YES

NAGITO'S LAUGH🥺🥺🥺

I fear this teacher😀

Wait....Mitirai...and the Ultimate Imposter......what the fuck is going on

HAJIME IS THAT YOU, MY BELOVED NON-SHAPE-KNOWING BOI

Awwwww he's hurt by what people say🥺

CHIAKI I MISSED YOU

Hajime, you DO have a talent. You're the Ultimate Nagito Magnet

Man, I'm probably not gonna get to see Hajime on screen a lot in this anime😔

Hey blonde bitch how ya doin

Okay we've officially seen the gang! Time for episode 2!

Episode 2:

"They're all good eggs" tell that to killing game nagito lol

Why the fuck are those two always fighting😭

"I'll have you know that we are training in real life combat conditions" "Oh in that case, knock yourself out"

This is why you don't take random glowing bottles from pervert chefs, kids.

NAGITOS JUST SITTING THERE SMILING LMAOOOOOOOO

Hajime looks so uncomfortable that a teacher is trying to have a casual conversation with him😂

Oh are they talking about the Kamakura project?

Gundam playing video games makes me so happy and idk why maybe because I love how dramatic he is lol

You ever like someone so much that when they do something as simple as speak you start freaking out at how awesome they are? Yea that's how I feel about Nagito.

ARE THEY PLAYING MARIO KART?!?!?!

why is the school rumbling GUNDHAM WHAT DID YOU DO

Nagito crying over the food lmaooooo

What did Akane sayyyy😀

NO ONE TOLD ME THIS WAS A HENTAI

WHAT THE FAWK IS GOING ON

Props to Fuyuhiko for being a man and stopping Kazuichi

Istg whatever they pay these voice actors clearly isn't enough

MIKAN WHAT DID YOU SAYYYYY NO ONEE TOLD ME YOU WERE A LESBIAN

I don't even know what to say about Nagito😳

CHIAKI JUST FUCKIN PUNCHED HIM

"I regret nothing"

Nagito's so wholesomely making everyone uncomfortable🥺

Chiaki and Hajime's relationship is soooo wholesome🥰

Episode 3:

Hajime has literally solved the murders of his friends 5 times, and he calls himself average🤨

Why are all the other Reserve Course students blue?

Wait isn't that blondie Fuyuhiko's sister?

Hajime being in the middle of these random girls fighting be like 👁👄👁

Okay I'm kinda scared to ship the green hair girl and Mahiru because they might be siblings

Hard to believe that this girl is my baby boi's sister. At least Fuyuhiko has the dignity to not randomly bully a girl for no reason

Okay I hope the FBI doesn't come to my door if these two are siblings but MAHIRU I SAW YOU BLUSH GIRL I SHIP IT

Thank god fuyuhiko understands that his sister is crazy

Hajime and Chiaki gaming together is so cute🥰

I hope Chiaki didn't just accidentally convince Hajime to do the Kamakura Project😀

The blonde just called her lovesick for Mahiru...I think we got non-related lesbians on our hands

Wait.....THIS IS WHAT HAPPENED IN TWILIGHT SYNDROME MURDER CASE WHAT THE FUCK

Okay I'm kinda starting to feel bad for the blondie

GREEN HAIRED GIRL KILLED HER HOLY FUCK THAT ESCALATED QUICKLY

Wait...if the green-haired girl didn't kill her...then who did?

Woah....why is the green-haired girl acting like that🤨

WAIT GREEN HAIR GIRL IS DEAD WHAT

Is this really how people normally treat Reserve Course Students? The discrimination is so unfair.

HOW DARE THIS BASTARD TOUCH MY PRECIOUS HAJIME😤

Oh so they're on a mission

Omfg Hajime don't you DARE think you're nothing and agree to be a lab rat I swear

FUCK NO HE AGREED

I am so close to crying rn😀

How's Chiaki gonna react to this😔

Episode 4:

Chiaki is sad aww🥺

Okay Nagito looking serious is NEVER a good sign

SHIT NAGITO FROWNED THAT'S NOT GOOD

Komaeda is so polite😌

Nagito.....what is Plan B😀

WHITE-HAIRED GIRL HOW YOU DOIN😁

Oh its other blonde boy and peach-haired bitch

WELL CLEARLY NAGITO'S LUCK AIN'T SHIT

HOLY SHIT NO😭

WAIT NAGITO SET UP FUCKIN BOMBS?!?! Man, I love my chaotic boi🥰

THEY SWITCHED BAGS TOO?!?!?

This is gonna be a huge shit show, isn't it?

POOR WHITE-HAIR GIRL SHE'S COMPLETELY INNOCENT😭😭😭

What the fawk😀

HOW IS HE SO CALM, JUST LIKE "I don't think that was a laxative😕"

NAGITO'S JUST TALKING BOUT HOW UNLUCKY HE IS WHILE ALL THIS SHIT IS GOING DOWN LMAOOO

WAIT SHE JUST SLAPPED HIM

YES TEACHER LADY YOU TELL HIM HOW FUCKIN AWESOME HE IS

Yay Komaeda won't get expelled😊

WAIT NO DON'T TRANSFER HER I LOVE HER NOOOOO

Uh yeah he did it all for yall 'cause he's fuckin nagito komaeda🤨

WAIT SHE'S GONNA COME BACK?!?!?! HOLY SHIT YES

Episode 5:

Poor Mitirai🥺

yeah, see? This is why I relate to Mitirai. ANIMATION IS FUCKIN MAGICAL.

Thank GOD. I thought we were gonna have to watch the teacher lady suffer😅

Okay I know this is pretty off topic, but where the fuck is Hajime

Of course as soon as I ask that question, they start talking about the Kamakura project😅

Expelled? Bullshit.

Wait NO I WANNA SEE MORE NAGITO🥺🥺🥺

WAIT THOSE ARE THE CHARACTERS FROM THE FIRST GAME

Awww they're so happy to see her how wholesome🥺

"You perfect cinnamon roll" MY THOUGHTS EXACTLY

SAIONGI WENT THROUGH A GROWTH SPURT HOLY FUCK

Wait Mitirai and......Mitirai? So he IS the ultimate imposter.

"People flake out and let you down, but carbs are always there" - Mitirai. Truer words have never been spoken😢

IT'S JUNKO FUCKIN ENOSHIMA BABY

Right, the killing game hasn't happened yet, so both Mukuro and Junko are alive and well

So, are the ultimate imposter and mitirai sibings?

Mitirai no don't overwork yourself🥺

Did he just....say "I need you"....pick her up.....and give no other context?😀

Poor Mitirai

WAIT MIKAN NO IT'S NOT THAT KIND OF MOVIE

MAKOTO MY BOY I MISSED YOU

HAJIME IS THAT YOU? YOU LOOK TERRIBLE

Wait...HAJIME NO

HAJIME DON'T YOU DARE

WHAT ABOUT CHIAKI?!?!?!

HAJIME'S EYES ARE RED NOOOOOOO

I'm gonna miss good old Hajime😔

Episode 6:

HAJIME NO TALENTLESS PEOPLE ARE STILL PEOPLE

WHY THE FUCK ARE THEY DOING THIS TO AN INNOCENT HIGH SCHOOLER

It's......Izuru Kamakura😔

Hajime no🥺🥺🥺🥺🥺

Awww Chiaki misses him

Wait why didn't the teacher just lie and say that Hajime was expelled🤨

I am so close to crying rn😀

Ponytail teacher lady is gonna realize the heartbreaking truth about Hajime, isn't she?😔

Awwww buff guy🥺

That is the weirdest tourture I've ever seen

The sad thing is she doesn't even know that it was Hajime who was made the victim to the project.

Wait why is Kamakura there what's going on

"KAMAKURA KAMAKURA YAS Q U E E N."

CAN MUKURO STOP LETTING JUNKO MAKE FUN OF HER LIKE BITCH YOU ARE AWESOME

Ikuru literally the entire time Junko is talking is basically just: 😑

WAIT HE AGREES WITH JUNKO NO

wait....MITIRAI IS GONNA MEET JUNKO FUCK NO

FUCK NOOOOOO

Okay we're officially halfway through, and I'm super pissed that Nagito is god knows where because he's the ONLY reason I'm watching this

Episode 7:

MITIRAI STOP TALKING TO HER RUN ASAP AHHHHHHHHH

Junko does realize that she basically just triggered every single fan of Danganronpa, right🤨

"aWw lOoK aT hiM trEmBLe hE'S goNnA bUrsT a blOoD veSsEL bEcAuSe I jUsT diSseD hiS wAifUS"

WAIT JUNKO NO DON'T SMILE LIKE THAT

THEY THINK HE'S DEAD LMAOOOOO

NAGITO YES FINALLY

NAGITO WTF PUT SOME CLOTHES ON

Wait so is that the crash site of the what killed his parents🥺

Kazuchi, Teruteru, stop being pervs and shut up please🥰

GUNDHAM YES WE STAN

MITIRAI IS MISSING NO

Istg if they lay a hand on Mikan they bouta lose a hand😀

Poor buff guy🥺

SHIT NO THEY'RE GONNA BRAINWASH HER

Junko's eyes really went ⬆️↗️➡️↘️⬇️↙️⬅️

Wait who tf are these people🤨

Junko what is it with you and killing games😀

Wait she's actually really good at singing😯

Can we get an f in the chat for these poor students

IZURU WHAT THE FUCK DID YOU JUST DO

THEY'RE SWEEPING IT UNDER THE RUG AGAIN?!?!?!?

So that was his promise😔

It's the cool moving comic thing from the games😯

The Reserve Course students are NOT happy😀

Poor Chiaki still misses him😔

Imagine if she knew HE was the killer

Episode 8:

(So some of my notes were deleted and when I rewrote them they got deleted twice. So I'm just gonna go where I left off.)

NAGITO YES MY BOY I MISSED YOUUUUU

"Who are you" lol

At least CHIAKI is nice to Nagito

YES NAGITO YOU LIFE-SAVER😤

Talk about what🤨

WHY ARE THEY TREATING THESE STUDENTS TO "KNOW THEIR PLACE" ISTG

Okay Nagito what is it with your luck

"Oh we found a secret passage cool😶"

POOR MITIRAI

WAIT NAGITO KNEW?!?!?!?

NAGITO HAS A FUCKIN GUN I REPEAT NAGITO HAS A GUN WHY DOES HE HAVE A GUN

OKAY WHY DOES NAGITO SOUND SO THREATENING ALL OF A SUDDEN

Okay am I crazy or was that interaction between izuru and nagito just now pretty gay?

NAGITO HOLY FUCK NO

OH THANK THE LORD

NAGITO THIS IS NO TIME TO BE A SIMP FOR IZURU

Episode 9:

That....is Hinata😔

WAIT NO DON'T YOU DARE HYPNOTIZE CHIAKI

Teacher lady is gonna be hypnotized, isn't she😖😞

OKAY JUNKO THIS IS TOO FAR

Wait is Mikan pretending?

Poor Guy😢

YEAH LISTEN TO NAGITO

I mean, I don't wanna abandon the teacher but it's already too late

WAIT IS THAT WHAT HE LOOKS LIKE?!?!?

It's so sad to know that they're just running into destruction😔

NO POOR TEACHER LADY

STOP IT RIGHT NOW

NO NO NO NO NO NO NO NO NO NO NO NO NO NO NO NO NO NO NO NO NO NO

NOOOOOOOOOOO

You're already too late😞

WAIT WHY ARE THEY BEING SO VIOLENT

Poor Mitirai, man🥺

WAIT NO JUNKO YOU WOULDN'T

Junko STOP LEAVE HIM ALONE

You're in deep shit, Junko

WAIT NO DON'T DIE MITIRAI

Oh thank god😅

Mitirai😭

Poor Nagito too

WAIT MIKAN WHY

NO THE TEACHER IS DEFINITELY HYPNOTIZED NOPE

Episode 10:

Something's wrong....

Chiaki, don't be fooled

Wait is he actually gay tho

Okay Junko please SHUT THE FUCK UP🥰

This isn't gonna go well, is it?

CHIAKI NO

JUNKO DON'T YOU LAY A HAND ON HER

Wait why are they in a trial room

WAIT NAGITO WHY DIDN'T YOU WARN THEM BEFORE

CHIAKI NO

(Won't let me type anymore. Continue post here)

#the end of hope's peak high school #danganronpa 3

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eirenical · 4 years

Photo

@onemuseleft in response to my latest fic post...

AHAHAHA, OMG. XD You have no idea how hard this made me laugh. Because it really, really did. And I hope you don’t mind, but I actually wanted to take an opportunity to talk about this a little bit, because you’re not the first person I’ve talked to whose been drawn to the show because 1) the happy romcom vibe and The Gay from the first ten eps or so or 2) (possibly) it’s one of the few Z1L shows on Viki, so you’re going to run into it sooner or later if you’re looking for more of him to watch. ;D

OK, SO. In my defense, a decent part of the suffering is because I’ve taken it on as a challenge to write as many fic for this fandom (Granting You A Dreamlike Life) for Whumptober as possible. I’ve had a REALLY dark AU in my head for this canon pretty much since I got about halfway through watching it, because the set up is PERFECT for it, and Whumptober was just too good of an opportunity to indulge that desire to pass up.

(And this got... kind of long, so I’m going to put the rest behind a cut. XD)

I am catering like... 150% to my own tastes in this fic, because all the people I know who would be interested in a fic like this are not in this fandom, but OH WELL. When I’m done I’LL have it to read, and sometimes that’s enough. ^_^

HOWEVER. It should also be noted that SO FAR about 75% of the angst and suffering in this fic and its prequel ARE CANON. Like... There is a tiny scene in the first fic that I slotted in, but really it could have been reappropriated from an earlier scene in a different episode, because it’s very similar. There’s more non-canon stuff in the second fic, but the entire framing of the situation and where we end up IS ALSO CANON.

So, my point is that this ENTIRE SHOW IS SUFFERING. XD And yeah, I’m indulging that to the max, but if you are looking for a happy romcom type show... I would stop somewhere around episode 14 or 15 or so and just pretend the rest of the show doesn’t exist. ;D

But IF THAT HASN’T SCARED YOU OFF YET... here are a few things you should know before you jump on in...

1. The show is a soap opera. Get that into your head right now. And just like a soap opera, if it is possible for the plot to take a turn for the worst... IT WILL. If it is possible for the most unlikely and ridiculous thing to happen, especially in the name of making things worse? IT WILL HAPPEN. The ONLY other shows I know that do that are soap operas. So. Take that for what you will. ;D

2. There are three main “arcs” to the show:

Episodes 1-14/15ish: Mostly happy go lucky romcom. Adorable. Hilarious. SO MUCH GAY, OMG SO MUCH GAY, WHY DID THIS SHOW NOT END IN A THREESOME. *sobs softly* THEY’RE SO CUTE TOGETHER AND THEY COULD HAVE BEEN SO HAPPY, I REALLY NEED TO WORK ON THAT FIC, TOO.

Episodes 15/16-25/26ish: Things get BAD. Love triangles, separations, betrayals, soft squishy boys turned into the ACAB cliche, just... everything starts to fall apart and there is SO MUCH SAD.

Episodes 26-40: AHAHAHAHA. YOU THOUGHT THINGS WERE BAD BEFORE? BOY WERE YOU WRONG. THAT WAS A THIRD GRADE PICNIC IN COMPARISON. ON A SUNNY DAY. WITH YOUR FAVORITE DESSERT. THINGS ARE NOW VERY VERY VERY BAD. THEY ARE AWFUL. EVERYTHING THAT CAN BE DONE TO HURT YOUR FAVE WILL BE DONE TO HURT YOUR FAVE, ESPECIALLY IF YOUR FAVE IS LUO FUSHENG. ALSO THIS SHOW HAS A BODY COUNT. A VERY HIGH BODY COUNT. ODDS ARE YOUR FAVE WILL DIE BY THE END BECAUSE NEARLY EVERYONE DOES.

So... try to be prepared for that. XD

3. Zhu Yilong is FUCKING AMAZING in this show and it is 1000% worth it to watch it JUST FOR HIM ALONE. I mean... LOOK AT THIS NONSENSE. WHAT EVEN IS THAT??? I CAN’T. HALP. *screams into a pillow* XD (Thanks again for making that gifset, @elvencantation; it is still very much a happy place for me. ;D)

4. Kind of a corollary to #1, but... don’t expect the plot to make sense. It... it won’t. It is a soap opera. The plot is not the point. The point is the relationships between the characters, and there is pretty much just barely enough plot to give those relationships a set on which to sit. So, yeah. Don’t... don’t expect the plot to make sense. You will break your brain trying to make sense of it. By the same token, this show is ostensibly set in the 1920s (possibly 1930s?) in Dongjiang; a port city in China. I... uh... yeah... just... just picture it as an alternate world that is loosely based on the real place and historical accuracy is just... not a thing. At all. XD

5. There’s a framing plot in episode 1 (and 2?) and 40 that bookends the series and everything in between is a girl telling the story of her grandmother’s great love affair/tragedy as a child. The framing characters are played by the two main characters’ actors, but they have... nothing to do with them. This SHOULD have been a reincarnation plot, because it would have made SO MUCH MORE SENSE, but it wasn’t. Not even in the original book. So... IDK. Just run with it and don’t worry too much if those parts don’t make sense. XD

And if there is ANYTHING ELSE YOU WANT TO KNOW or if you decide to start watching and you want to yell about it, I AM ALWAYS WILLING TO YELL ABOUT THIS SHOW. I am also happy to give away spoilers if you need/want to know things like “is my fave one of the few who doesn’t die?” Because, I get needing to know that. XD

Anyway... HAVE FUN, I GUESS?

Because I completely unexpectedly love this ridiculous little show with all my fucking heart (because WTF, I HATE soap operas, especially ones built on romantic misunderstandings and miscommunications where everyone dies in the end and... THAT IS THE WHOLE PLOT OF THE SHOW WTF BRAIN????) and I need more people to talk to about it. XD

#granting you a dreamlike life #onemuseleft #conversations through replies #people saying nice things #...yes it counts #XDDDD #I'M SORRY IF THIS WAS WAY MORE THAN YOU WANTED TO KNOW #BUT YOU EXPRESSED A VAGUE INTEREST #AND I GOT EXCITED #OOPS #XD #gyadl meta #eirenical.meta

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riskeith · 3 years

Note

hi babe, hope you slept well.. ♥️

answering on the phone is just *takes screenshots* *opens tumblr app* *switch between screenshots and answering* do you also put on my messages on the laptop and answering with your phone usually, because that’s what i do lmao sjshdks. thank god for technology.

(I LOVE BEING CALLED BRO.. i believe that i would’ve been a dudebro in another life tbh..) there is? i’m not super immersed in the fandom actually so i had no idea, do you have any examples? ofc only if you wanna talk about it i know these topics can sometimes be annoying to think about. also you’re right! ‘don’t like don’t read’ is the law. follow it. i can’t believe how some people have the nerve to talk about what other people do creatively... yikes

you should if you ever find yourself not knowing what to read! i think their fics were some of my first in the fandom and they set the bar so high hehe. dude i love how oikawa just wants to see kageyama burn it’s so funny..... he’s so cocky about it while kageyama’s just his moody self. speaking of; one of my fave fics of yours is the swapping jerseys one!

WTF 😭 BABY POOLS AND POOL FLOATIES..... razor please come back to us please. sidenote but do you also think that his powers are 5 star level? hes soo powerful it’s so odd how he’s only 4 star haha... or maybe it’s just me being biased.

YEAH! THE SAVING SCENE IS SO AHHHHH. god especially if they have dialogue while person a is hurting and person b just spills all their feelings and becomes so erratic and scared and person a is like holy shit you love me.... and after everything is okay there’s still some awkwardness and tension and aaa.... 💢💔

OOO. sadly the ps5 is always out of stock it’s crazy how fast it sold out. but i mean it makes sense it’s arguably the most popular console so.. hopefully they restock soon. last of us is such a fun game! and the second part is ~gay~ which is always a plus. i’m not sure which memes you mean? tell me 👁 HAHA that makes sense actually omg... lumine and aether reunion won’t happen until like two years if the updates keep coming the way they are (STOP THAT WOULD ACTUALLY BE SO FUNNY.... like hello if you want to unlock the rest of the story you either gacha $pin for it or you imagine it yourself love ♥️😗) talking about this makes me wonder what the other worlds might look like....

your followers are just here to witness us planning our co-op date sjsjdkdjskz. speaking of,,, hehe. i have some fantastic news. i’m at ar level 11 right now and co-op unlocks at level 16... i might just reach that tomorrow (today for you) so i’m just saying hehehehehehehehehehehe.... 😏♥️

BOWL CUT. my cutie little baby. also mullet? sounds nice omg you will probably rock that look... 😳 i’m a non mullet supporter but if cluna has a mullet then call me a yeehaw mullet lover i suppose. can’t believe my wife is a cowboy. OMG YEAH IT MUST FEEL SO NICE your head went bzz bzz. how long did it take for them to accept it? and yeah god ikr some people take hair so seriously which is fair but also i’ve never understood it... like it grows out..? wow you really went from a ballet girl to punk rock style huh. i feel like you’re the both sides of the ‘she was a punk she did ballet’ meme.

memo fic is a jealous fic? mmm smells good. I FIGURED jshdjdkhsjs slow songs are just not your forte, huh? rip. langst is the best yet worst thing ever tbh. and YEAH I DO we’re truly 🤝 ok literally mood sometimes it’s just nice to talk about how much you love a character through another character in a fic yk? so what if this 2k fic contains 1k words about how beautiful oikawa looks? it’s what iwa feels <3 (YOU’RE LEARNING!!!!!!! THATS SO EXCITING!! i guess you just have to drive me around, huh?)

oh i’m in love i’m with that fic my girl. and i knew about that spoiler it’s kind of hard to miss it since it’s everywhere skdhdkdhdk... god, that sounds so good thank you for sharing it. pining iwaizumi hajime >>>>>>>> the air i need to exist 🥺

THE DAY IS SO SOON CLUNA, it’s literally here soooo soon holy shit i just can’t wait. i played for almost 6 hours today in a row like an idiot and now i never wanna see hilichurls again in my life but hey, one step closer to my baby. prepare yourself.. 😏

AWWW i had a feeling you’d be a tea person. but omg tea effects your sleep? how late is too late for you to drink it? what’s your favorite flavors? 👁 and i’m addicted to both shdkdhsks. i say addicted bc i literally have 6 cups of tea per day easily and like.. 1 or 2 coffee cups per day. it’s really bad but i can’t stop so.. 🙇🏽‍♀️

COLLEGE BOYFIES CLUNA. COLLEGE BOYFIES WITH DIP DYE HAIR. imagine them doing each other’s make up and nails before going to concerts together. imagine xiao in euphoria kind of make up. holy shit. here’s something for your overwhelmed heart jsdhjshska. xiaoven soulmates girl, no doubt about it. THE EDIT THE EDIT THE EDIT!!!! they just look so beautiful. we need scenes with them like Asap. the edit is based on a fic... notes down.

can’t wait to see your screenshots. super excited!!

xo, m.a. (i almost wrote my name down in a haste shshskdjdk... although you’ll find it out soon...)

hiya!! i slept alright~ ahaha

:o that’s smart! but no i don’t LOL whether i’m on my phone or my laptop i just continuously scroll up and down fhdskjfkhsdf i think that’s why i come close to missing some paragraphs some times oops. yay for the ~wonders of technology~

(AIGHT NICE AHAHHA fhsdkjfsh does that mean you’re a bit of a tomboy?) actually coincidentally i came across this thread: https://twitter.com/maxatsuomi/status/1350145589296685057 which gives you an idea lmao (also some things on there i wasn’t even aware of wtf) EXACTLY??? it’s even worse when non content creators try to come for content creators like?????????/ um you’re getting all this food for FREE and yet?????? lmfao the nerve of some people

i def will!! FKJSHFDSKJ yeah that do be their dynamic lolol. and thank you!! i too think i snapped on that one 😩😩 glad others agree ahahah

i actually haven’t really seen him in combat... and when we could trial him i was too busy trying to pass the quests to focus on how he fought fhdkfhsdkfjshf but i do think his abilities are cool!! he have wolf above head 🥺

YEAHHH BOYEEEEEEEEEEE god that reminds me of a scene from a drarry fic (What We Pretend We Can't See wink wonk)

oh damn!! hope they restock soon for your sake~ yissss ive watched a playthrough and omg lev.... my Son. i don’t think i can find the memes again but it was just about the bugs like how if you throw a grenade on the highway everyone will run out of their cars like a flashmob or something hfskfhsdjfkds. (LMAOOOOO) there’s actually a trailer with the other worlds! https://youtu.be/TAlKhARUcoY (it has spoilers tho supposedly lol. none we understand rn at least)

hdsfkhjs. omg you absolute legend!!!! but i also hope that you’re taking care of yourself and prioritising the important things too fhsfhdksdhf. but i am excited hehehehehe

AHHAAHKFHDSKJFSD pls... once i saw someone with an actual proper mullet on the bus and i was like “ew... keith would look like this irl?” FJSDHKFSAHKDASHDFSDJFKJFDSHFKJS. but what can i say i got influenced by all the kpop bois 😔 and hmmm idk? i think my dad didn’t care too much but ik my mum did/does fhsfskfsdfhkf so who knows lollllllllllllllllllllllllllllll. IT REALLY DOES GROW OUT LMAO LIKE. fhkshkfsdkj my cousin called me a rockstar when she saw it LOL so you’re prob right 🤪

yeah slow songs really just. aren’t LMAO ‘behind this mask of mine’ was based on a slow bts song and i put it in the playlist i had for it (bc obviously) but i wanted to skip it every time hfksjdhfskjdfhskfdkfhkslfhadksfjsdjhfkashkfjsdh. EXACTLY!!!!!!!!!! you are so correct. (hehehe i was gonna say that too that you don’t need to drive bc it’ll take you around 😏 LMAO)

fhkdsj thank!! legit pining iwa.......... more like pining ME mayhaps i just be self projecting 🤪🤪

lolol dw i can fight the hilichurls for you 😩 also who’s your fave enemy to fight! i used to like fighting the treasure hoarders most but the hilichurls are cute.. FHSKJDHFSDFKJSD plus i need their fucking masks my god why are their drop rates so shit hfsdhjfks

i’m not too sure actually? i’ve never been up early enough to test it but i like drinking tea like after dinner... which is the problem AHAHA. hmm well i like matcha a lot LOL but also chai? and then like black tea.... all the other ones too... i used to drink some fruity ones which were nice but we have a lot of the like basic chinese ones at home too and i enjoy those as well lol. wbu?? omg.... m.a........... dfhksdfkjhfkjshfksjd that’s a lot!!!!!!! do you even need to drink water then HKDSJFHKSDFHDKDSHFJKSDH

omg............. ive never seen euphoria LOL but ............. omg ...................... i cannot process thoughts rn.....

xoxo!! c.r. (you mean bc we’ll be playing co-op? you don’t have to if you’re uncomfy fhdskjf my genshin name was literally ‘aether’ up until yesterday FHDFHSDKFSDFJSHFKSDF)

#marriage anon #wowclunaanswers #long post

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randomfandomimagine · 4 years

Text

Amazing ‘The Amazing Devil’ Things (Horror and the Wild)

I need to fangirl for a little because I absolutely love The Amazing Devil and I was so excited for the new album, and it did not dissapoint!! They put so much love and passion into this and it is art! I have been saving a bit of money and since their music makes me so happy I might buy the album. I wanted to talk about my favorte things about it under the cut (warning: it’s long). If anyone wants to listen to this piece of art, they posted it on Bandcamp here :D

The Rockrose and the Thistle

The sound of wind in the background, such a cool little detail!

Joey’s soft voice and how it breaks on ‘thistle’, omg

The sewing metaphor, I absolutely love it!

Madeleine subtly joining in 😍

The atmosphere! How unsettling and moving the song is

‘The kindest thing is to never leave you alone’

The Horror and the Wild

I thought I couldn’t love this song more and then came the studio version

I am a nerd and have so much fun singing this one!!

Even if it’s almost impossible to sing both their parts hahah

The beginning reminds me of Led Zeppelin’s Kashmir and I love it!

Some lyrics I trully adore, like:

‘You’re the words I promise I don’t mean’

‘and I am Time itself, I slow to let you play, I steal the hours and turn the night into day’

The change after ‘remember me I ask, remember me I sing’

How they move on to the chorus using a similar sounding word

‘Give me back my heart you wingless thing / think of all the horrors’

I absolutely adore how they sing ‘wild’ in this version

How Joey’s voice raises with ‘the’ and ‘your’ in the chorus

‘Fret. Not. Dear. Heart. Let. Not. Them. Hear’ and the drums!!

Joey singing that growly ‘remember me’

Then what is probably my favorite part of the song:

Just how cool it sounds, how fun it is to sing along, the awesome lyrics…

Fret not dear heart, let not them hear

The mutterings of all your fears, the fluttering of all your wings

Welcome to the storm, I am thunder,

Welcome to my table bring your hunger

The repetition of ‘old man’ and how the song slightly fades at the end

Wild Blue Yonder

How upbeat it is!! Catchy and fun rhythm!

When they sing ‘wonder’ and ‘yonder’ together

‘Hold’ (pause) ‘this time we’re done for’ 👏

‘So hold me like you used to, so tight I’d bruise you’

Everytime they use the word ‘love’ I melt

Or ‘dear heart’, ‘darling’ or anything like that, for that matter 😍

It is my absolute kryptonite, seriously!

‘All those books we both drowned’

‘I’m lost, I’m found, in you’

‘Can you hear that scratching’

‘robot vampire’…. just 😂

Madeleine’s voice when she sings the high ‘hide under the covers’

Welly Boots

One of my personal favorites!! (if you can’t tell)

The guitar!! Love that riff!!

The changes in tone, I love them so much

As many have said before, it reminds me of the Witcher episode 6

Just these lyrics!!

The change in rhythm after this last part!! So good!!

And I love you, don’t you know

That I’ll be with you all along, as long as you are kind

To those who are not strong and cannot find their scarlet welly boots

Cos when it’s cold

I’ll wrap my scarf around you

And when it’s hard

I’ll place your head into my hands

And when you scream that it’s not fair,

It’s like I’ve gone off to the coast

Left you behind just standing there

Pretending not to see your ghost

If only you could hear my voice

But you are screaming far to loud to hear me swear

Just because I left doesn’t mean that I’m not still there

The drums set the rhythm so well and I love them in this song especially!

‘But I’ll stick up for you, even though you haven’t got a clue, you haven’t got a fucking clue, And I’m so proud of you‘

Bonus points for Joey swearing 😂

‘I know you’re strong enough to do this on your own’

As always, Madeleine’s beautiful voice joining in 😍

‘Just when you’re about to give up every hope you have you turn around Perched by the stairs, someone’s gone and left behind, A brand new pair of scarlet welly boots’

That part hits me right in the feels and I can’t even tell why

The outro guitar riff, even if it makes me sad that it’s over

Farewell Wanderlust

THE PIANO FOLLOWED BY MADELEINE’S VOICE? I’M DEAD

THE SONG LITERALLY JUST STARTED, WTF? I’M IN LOVE

Joey’s voice lowly accompanying Madeleine’s

‘I’m the hardest goodbye that you’ll ever have to say’

Just… Madeleine’s voice, it’s too gorgeous, I can’t handle it!!

How the piano stops at ‘I’m the Jesus of wishing to Christ he’ll come back‘

The way she sings ‘She’s down. She’s dead’ and the piano? Aaaaah

Joey whispering the lyrics and then his voice gathering strength

‘I promise you I’m not broken, I promise you there’s more’ gets me every time 😭

The way Joey sings ‘adieu’ is amazing and I don’t know why?

When they sing the chorus together it’s too much!! Omg, this is art!

The fucking ending is so brilliant, perfect end to a perfect song!

The tune also reminds me of an Avenged Sevenfold song, ’Acid Rain’

Maybe it’s the piano? Idk, but it just moved me all the more

Because Avenged Sevenfold is one of my favorite bands 😚

So when favorite bands collide I just can’t even hahah 😊

Fair

Probably my favorite along with Welly Boots (this is gonna be long)

This one reminds me so much of my series Soul of a Warrior (Jasnissa!)

‘It’s what my heart just yearns to say, In ways that can’t be said’

The first lyrics and I am already in love with the words in this song

Let’s just assume I fell in love with every single word of this one

Joey’s voice is so beautiful to listen to, I am s w o o n i n g

‘And he holds her close just to keep the world at bay’

‘It’s not fair how much I love you’ 😱😍😭

I really love the guitar in this one too

Again, those lyrics!!! Absolutely captivating:

The way his voice kind of breaks a little sometimes when he lowers it

And if you asked me to, if you asked me I would lose it all

Like petals in a storm, cos darling I was born

To press my head between your shoulder blades at night when light is fading

Just to let you know I’m old, waylaid and feels like I am wading into

carpet burns and carousels oh Christ you’ll be the death of me

And calm throughout his melodrama she will turn and say ‘dear heart It’s me, its me

You don’t need to pretend to be someone you’re not

The Office reference and the ‘that’s what she said’? Joey, you nerd 🥰

Also, how he kind of laughs as he is saying it?

‘cos you make me ache you bastard’ aaaaaaaaah

That Unwanted Animal

This one gives me very specific vibes that I can’t identify

It’s like kind of medieval and dark but there’s something else

Still, I absolutely love them, this one is so unique!

When Madeleine whispers ‘you light the candle’, literal chills

Why is her voice so beautiful?! Stop it, ma’am, you are too powerful!

‘You try so loud to love me, But I cannot seem to hear’

The hushed ‘Throw the plate at the wall’ and the change? Amazing!

The vocals in the background are incredible!

More fanfastic lyrics, they never stop!

‘Be good to me, I whisper. And you say what. And I said nothing dear’

‘And these plates they smash like waves’ Battle Cries!!!

And you rip my ribcage open

And devour what’s truly yours

And our screaming joins in unison

I cry out to the lord

The lyrics never fail to amaze me, they are so damn good!

‘No, not I’ Joey? Sir, please, have mercy 😂

That ending with Madeleine’s voice and the drum and the guitar and the violin? *chef’s kiss*

Marbles

Again, knew this by heart because of the live version

And the studio version just improves it if that’s possible?

The instruments at the beginning already give me chills

And then Joey and Madeleine taking turns to sing? Ugh!

When the drum comes in I absolutely love it

I think this version is a bit slower than the live one? I like it!

It’s also softer, they’re almost whispering at the start 💗

‘And you’re the thigh high hemline I just can’t stop staring at’ is, for some reason, such a fun line to sing :)

‘The flat we rented was a palace for my queen’

‘She sang do you think I’m sexy? And oh god I really did’

‘You’re not flawed darling, you’re just a little under-rehearsed’

My favorite part, even if I can’t exactly say why:

This song just tells such a compelling story!

And I’d sink to the floor, what’s the point anymore,

And you, you’d reply with a glint in your eye

(And you, you’d reply with a drink in your hand)

Saying ‘I don’t know, but I’m here, I’m all yours, dear heart don’t cry’

THE CHORUS IS PURE LOVE, OKAY?

‘Your eyes aren’t rivers there to weep but a place for crows to rest their feet’ is such a lovely thing?

More amazing lyrics:

How Joey holds the note in ‘day’ and shifts back into the chorus

I’ve loved you, for a hundred years

Certainly fucking feels like it

The minute I met you the colours of my life begun to pour

I’m scared of the dark

And now, even though you’re mad and these memories won’t stay, it’s okay.

Cos now I get to meet you for the first time every single day

This song also reminds me a bit of the Witcher and Jaskier

‘The crows feet are new‘

‘Are you perhaps short of a marble?!′

Again, they nail the ending with Madeleine’s beautiful vocals

Battle Cries

As always, the guitar sounds great!

Something they often do that I love is how they sing different lyrics at the same time, Joey and Madeleine singing together is my weakness

THE LYRICS!

‘After summers of fasting I feel hunger at last’

But that breathing you hear don’t mistake it for sighs

Don’t you realise - They’re just battle cries dear

And these lines aren’t wrinkles dear heart

Hardly knew the words

They’re just dollops of paint on a new work of art

I’m dolled up love don’t I deserve to just

And as I walk away I know I’ve been through the wars,

But that creaking you hear in my bones is not pain, it’s applause

‘Our devils broke rank, and out of the depths came an army’

With you I could summon the gods and the stars

Watch them dance out the plays that we wrote from the heart

And we’d laugh at the ghosts of our fears. We were kids.

‘This isn’t a break up, dear heart, it’s a season finale’

This one just gets me with the tune and the lyrics together!

All it took to unearth in the dust and the dirt

Some release or respite from the heat and the hurt

Was taking the time now and then to ask how I am

And now at the end, at the end of all things,

I’m not going to scream, beat my chest at the wind,

I’m doing fine.

Also, Madeleine’s beautiful melody before the chorus, omg!

To summarize, this album made such an impression on me. I literally don’t remember last time I connected so much with someone’s music. They are all such incredible people and talented musicians, and Joey’s lyrics just stayed in my heart, he’s so incredible!

#my fangirling got out of control for a bit there #the amazing devil #the horror and the wild #joey batey #madeleine hyland #if joey happened to like this post i will die of happiness #*would #but he probably won't hahah #i just want them to know how amazing they are! 😭#rant #random #fangirling #long post

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smores100 · 4 years

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once again we’re in full agreement lol. What’s your take on s3 remakes you’ve watched? Wondering how you feel about Skam FR as it’s kind of a similar situation to me where the chemistry & beauty is there but the writing and style is iffy (overwrought &overdramatic). My favorite s3 is druck. As a wlw I had high hopes for españa but it was p slow/v desexualized—a whole discussion, but my other gay friend & I were disappointed given how remakes with guys don’t hold back in that respect.. Thoughts?

Honestly re: wtfock tho I really do wonder if they had like one good writer in the room surrounded by fools. Bc it really does feel like some group projects I’ve been in where I feel like I’m the only one who’s not a fucking fool and carry the whole thing while having to fend off bad ideas (but when the majority rules, those bad ideas/execution get put in). I wonder if that’s what happened w wtfock.

re: wtfock, lol group projects are the worst….idk what wtfock’s writing process was like, but i’d love to know it. according to their wiki there were 3 writers this season? all seem to be male, naturally. did the two other writers have good ideas but there was a main writer who overruled them and did his own thing? or maybe they’re the rl one brain cell squad, that would explain a lot :p in any case, i’m unimpressed (friday’s clips did not help with that).

as for the other part of your ask….oh damn i have so many Thoughts on that, lol. this is probably gonna get long and messy, but you asked for it!

* druck - my absolute favorite. it’s the only one i’ve watched since s1, so that definitely played a part in my emotional investment and attachment. still, there was more to it than that. it was the closest to og imo in vibe and style (it felt small, real, lowkey, quiet, natural like og, as opposed to - as you said - overwrought and overdramatic + overproduced like the others); they cast an actual trans guy to play a trans character, if you wanna talk about a skam remake doing something REVOLUTIONARY? druck is the one; i loved matteo’s and david’s characterizations, how they both had a bit of isak and even in them, and the role reversal in some scenes, made things feel fresh *and* fit their characters/story; i LOVE that teens matteo and david were played by actual teens michi and lukas!! they’ve completely ruined me for all other remakes, bc thissssss is how it’s supposed to be! thisssss is how it should look like! THEY ARE KIDDOS. and they (druck and michi/lukas) truly captured what it’s like to be young and fall in love for the first time, the awkwardness and the nervousness and stuttering and fumbling around, the softness and pureness and innocence of it all!!! also they have THE BEST dynamic - other people might prefer all the hot kissing and steamy making out and the smouldering looks, but me? i just couldn’t get enough of their dumb chaotic energy, best friends who love each other deeply and are also constantly little shits to one another. gimme them pranking each other and playfighting every day! and then being soft and THE HANDS and matteo being a clingy koala basking in david’s affection :3 i also loved how for the most part they didn’t just copy/paste og’s storyline, they made some changes and knew how to make *other* changes accordingly for it to make sense and fit the story *they* were telling - for example, replacing the ‘call your gf’ scene with matteo’s panic attack/breakdown (one of my fave scenes), or their reunion at the end of ep 7 (replacing the desperate kissing + sex with a comforting and relieved yet also bittersweet and melancholic hug), or even matteo getting advice from his drug dealer instead of the school’s doctor, lol. also THE BEST BOY SQUAD, hands down. and matteo is my favorite isak bc to me he felt like his own character instead of just another isak, he was different and reletable and a constant Mood. that being said - it wasn’t perfect and it had its issues. there were a few times when i did feel they stuck too close to og scenes and it didn’t *entirely* work for me, just felt a bit off; i will forever be disappointed that they didn’t directly address and acknowledge matteo’s mental state/depression, bc there were enough signs imo to indicate that he did suffer from something. they mentioned ‘therapy’ in mia’s, alex’s and kiki’s cases, i truly thought they would with matteo as well, but alas, they dropped the ball on that one; i was extremely upset with david’s outing, but i’ve since calmed down and have managed to see it in a more positive light, tho i still have mixed feelings about it and am not fully on board with that decision, still wish it had been done differently (but at least! it wasn’t brushed off and was addressed immediately and eventually led to david having agency and yelling out his pain!!! which was good and important and cathartic); also eps 8 and 9 were pretty messy writing-wise, things either didn’t make sense or would’ve made more sense had the clips were organized differently (that random ping pong clip….?). overall tho, the good outweighed the bad, and it remains my fave

* skam france - now that’s a tricky one. the way i felt about it in the first half of the season, is different from the way i felt about it in the second half of the season, is different from the way i feel about ever since watching druck’s s3. it’s funny you should say how similar it is to wtfock for you, bc i’ve been thinking the same thing for quite some time. those neighboring countries sure have a shared flair for the dramatic! fr’s s3 was pretty much the first s3 i watched (i gif-watched half of skamit, couldn’t get into it). i wasn’t planning to (i was extremely unimpressed by the couple of s1 eps i tried watching, and same by axel’s acting in those first two seasons), but even is the loml and they got me gooood with their eliott pov trailer, which might have affected my excitement over it during the first half. back then i really enjoyed it for the most part, despite some clips being rushed or missing the point thus not fully having the required effect (their locker room scene, for example, or the ‘generalizations are bad’ convo), or how much i hated basile (a character so obviously written by a man it’s amazing), or the cheesy piano music. there were enough good things for me to focus on instead (more in a bit) that i could ignore the things i didn’t like or weren’t as good imo. however, all the positivity got sucked out of me when yann noped tf out after lucas came out to him bc WAY TO MISS THE POINT OF SKAM!!! and things went downhill after the director’s IT’S NOT DISNEYLAND IT’S FRANCE 2019 comment. i’m getting all upset just thinking about it, but to say *that*, to explain that horrendous decision bc lowkey homophobic reactions are realistic!!! only to THEN be all ‘haha jk yann isn’t homophobic! we just wanted you to *think* he was! he’s actually an awesome friend who took several days to reflect on all his past wrongdoings while his bff was at home having a nervous breakdown bc he believed his bff hated him!’ ughhhhhhhhh, miss me with that shit. great that they had yann apologizing for his past comments, but the way in which it was done was for pure shock value and angst, completely ooc for his character (all season he was all ‘tell me tell me tell me let me help let me help let me help’ only to do *that*?? nahh), and interesting how out of everyone the only black character was the only one with a negative reaction (remind you of anyone), highlighted even more during ep 7 aka the ott lucas coming out tour. then ep 8, that should have been 100% all lucas and eliott and building up to eliott’s manic episode suddenly had that weird random pov changing clip in the middle of it which truly wtf, basile was still basile, lucas thanked chloe for outing him, more scenes felt rushed, they had sex in school where people could come and go in front of huge windows in broad daylight and luckily didn’t get poisoned from licking all that paint! and i did not like the flatshare, i absolutely hated mika and lisa kicking lucas out of his room - which he pays rent for! - and manon not even trying to put up a fight, and them being like ‘roommate isn’t just a place, it’s a way of living. that’s a family, and you’re more like a cousin.’ ‘a second cousin.’ ughhhhhh and then when eliott was recovering from his depressive episode, they *still* didn’t give lucas his room back or at least let eliott stay there, he was sleeping on the couch, i’m aldjlajdafj. can’t believe i’m gonna say it, but TAKE NOTES FROM WTFOCK. tl;dr there were some good moments in the second half, but i was feeling bitter more often than not about certain things, so my enjoyment wasn’t as high as when it first started. and after watching druck, druck’s brand is definitely much more my style. plus, i was already struggling with making myself believe axel and maxence were in their teens, but after druck it’s completely impossible, so i just pretend they’re in college or something lol. all my issues with it aside, i’d still rate it higher than wtfock, bc overall the writing was better, more coherent, and made much more sense. i also liked lucas’ friendship with the girls; i loved that instead of copying the underwater kiss + 21:21 like some others have, they came up with their own thing i.e. polaris, which i thought was lovely; the lucas/manon crying in the middle of the night together in front of the tv was one of my fave scenes of the season; also love how we were introduced to eliott on the first week! and they spent time together! and specifically the piano playing scene, ohhhh; and in general elu are sweet and i reeeeally like axel and maxence and their friendship. so yeah, it had some major issues, but i’d rather have a coherent story with something done for shock value and drama ONCE than an incoherent story with several shock value moments.

* skam espana - sorry to hear you girls were disappointed! i only watched half of it, so i can only comment on what i saw. i decided to binge watch s1 and give s2 a shot when i heard they were giving cris isak’s story - it felt a bit weird to me, but it was also something different and new, and i did have an appreciation for their decision to have a wlw season (also much more revolutionary to me than showing a gay bashing), so i was intrigued and willing to try it. sadly i didn’t really vibe with s1? it’s totally a personal preference i think, maybe even a cultural thing idk, but it felt very fast and loud and hectic to me, idrk how to explain it. i was just more into the chill more lowkey vibe of druck and skamnl. but i still gave s2 a shot, and idk, it still wasn’t my cup of tea. i thought it was ok for the most part, but there were some things that bothered me - joana/cris felt underdeveloped to me? and things b/w them felt like they were moving so fast from the second they met, like jona was so intense and forward ALL THE TIME, they had like 6 almost kisses in a really short time, like shhh slow down. i remember disliking their ‘call your gf’ scene, it felt really petty and kinda mean to me? bc i felt like joana came on to cris *really* strongly and *very* frequently, so cris was more than entitled to feel hurt and betrayed when she found out joana had a bf, but then cris was kissing a dude and joana positioned herself and her bf in front of cris so she’d see them kissing too, and i just didn’t like bc seriously?? cris is valid, just apologize to her and explain?? idr much else tbh, they had some really cute and sweet scenes afterwards, i’m still against doing the underwater kiss + 21:21 so i was kinda meh about that (tho aesthetically speaking it was BEAUTIFUL, and i’m like, fiiiiine girls deserve an underwater kiss too, i’ll allow it just this once!), and that cuddling clip in ep 6 i think was sweet and the last one i watched. like i said, i was less vibing with this remake, and iirc it was going on during druck’s s3 and skamnl’s s2 - which were my faves, plus skamfr was on too i think and i was lowkey following it too, so….there was just too much all at once and something had to go, and it was skamesp. it was also around the time when panaphobia-gate happened, so *shrugs* i’m not wlw myself so your opinion on it being desexualized is probably more valid than mine? i just know when i did watch, there was a lot of kissing and making out and being cute and touchy with each other, so i thought it was ok? as i’ve mentioned before, i don’t need to see a naked butt or anything like that to *get* it lol, i thought they were lovely! but that’s just me. i will say that my faaaave part was most definitely the cris/amira friendship. they were so wonderful! one of the best skam friendships imo. i might one day go back and finish the season just for the heck of it, but they didn’t do anything major or highly offensive that made me have negative feelings towards it, it was just a personal preference + circumstances (too many remakes!) that made me be less into it and drop it before the end.

#phallusophical #replies #sorry for the gigantic wall of text!#but like i said - you asked! haha #i'd put this under a read more but my blog theme makes it harder to read there so....sorry!#all those who aren't interested in my opinions just quickly scroll past this just this one time ty #aaaaanyway hope this answered your question??? 😊#skam remakes #long post #druck #skam france #wtfock #skam spain

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nerdygaymormon · 5 years

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Maybe you've answered this before, but why don't you just leave your church? Doesn't it bother you being part of something that rejects you? Don't you want love? I don't understand why gay people ever stay in that church.

I get these questions from time to time. Never sure what to make of them. I get that it’s unusual for a gay guy my age to still be part of church. I hope part of this is they like me and want me to be happier. But it also feels like they are looking down on me, idk.

I don’t have a short, simple answer, so strap in, it’s going to be a long ride.

1) I was a teenager in the 1980’s. It is hard to be gay now, but it was so bad back then. Being gay was shameful. The 80′s was the AIDS crisis, so mostly what I heard about being gay was death. There were no legal protections, society was against us. Actively hostile, bigoted statements were common. My own dad told homophobic jokes to big laughs. Coming out looked like I’d be condemning myself to a terrible life and strip all the good things from me.

Also, with no role models, I was having to work through what it means to be gay. I also did manage to get ahold of a gay porn magazine (this is long before internet was a thing). I was crazy to think I could hide it. I shared a room with three brothers so no privacy. Despite my denials, my parents knew this was mine and they were so upset. My dad now tells me he wishes he sent me to conversion therapy once he learned I had this magazine. Can you imagine?

2) I grew up believing in this church, which included the terrible things taught about me as a gay person. At age 19 when my bishop challenged me to pray about going on a mission, I instead prayed to know if God could possibly love me (which is really sad that a kid could grow up in church and not know that). I felt love radiate across my body as a voice in my ear said “You are not broken.” That experience sustained me for a long time

3) I went on a mission in the 1990’s. If you haven’t been on a mission, it’s probably a surprise that it can be a relief. There’s no pressure to date. I could form close bonds with other men, and even though these are non-romantic relationships, they are intensely close.

4) I was still in the closet when I went to the church schools in Rexburg & Provo. At the end of my first semester, my roommate came on to me and let me feel him up and stuff. I went to sleep thinking maybe the two of us could leave the church, transfer to a different school, say goodbye to my family and we could have a life together. It would be a huge sacrifice for both of us and I thought he felt the same, but the next morning he turned me in to our bishop. I thought I was going to get kicked out of school, be sent home in disgrace, maybe disciplined out of the church, but instead I was put on probation and had to stay the summer in Rexburg. I was heartbroken and swore off love and focused on school. At the end of the summer, to my surprise the bishop made me the elders quorum president.

That first roommate, we were best friends. He is Bi and decided a life with a woman would be easier, and considering it was the 1990′s, he was correct. He left school a few days later, met a woman and got married. I hate how he ended things, but I don’t blame him for the future he chose for his life.

5) BYU in Provo was my backup school, and reluctantly it’s where I transferred to. It turned out that I genuinely liked BYU with 2 exceptions, the severe restrictions the Honor Code placed on LGBT students (which was the same as at the Rexburg campus), and the fierceness with which the Honor Code Office sought to enforce those restrictions. Occasionally I’d hear rumors of sting operations they had done to catch gay students. There was this low-level fear always of getting caught whilst a student in Provo. My roommates also expressed their dislike of anything remotely gay. Even though I kept the rules, I didn’t dare tell anyone that I’m gay because the potential cost was high.

While at BYU I had a major faith crisis. I no longer believed a lot of the truth claims of the church, but I wasn’t about to lose all that tuition money. I stuck it out. So not only was I pretending to be straight, I also had to act as though nothing about church bothered me.

6) The same voice that told me I am not broken would occasionally tell me that it’s okay to pursue relationships. It gave me great hope. I still get that message. Being a good Mormon, I thought this meant that somehow God was going to change the church. In the temple I’d hear that it’s not good for man to be alone and the law of chastity was presented in a way that could include me if I was married to a husband (the temple says no sex except “with your husband or wife to whom you’re legally and lawfully wedded”).

7) After BYU, I should have come out and gotten on with life, but I didn’t. My first job was working for a Mormon boss. A landlord who is LDS gave me a deal on rent. Coming out seemed like it would disrupt my life in really negative ways. Plus YSA Wards were a source of friends and support network.

8) In my 30’s I was no longer in YSA wards, and the world was getting better for gay people. The fight for gay marriage was in full swing, and so many of the people in my life were very opposed to it. It bothered me that the church was so opposed and fought gay marriage because in my head, it was a way for me to follow God’s promptings and pursue a relationship.

Being a Mormon is very much an identity. It’s hard to peel off. It’s my social network, it’s what much of family life revolves around, It’s a belief system and way of viewing the world. it’s a map of what one’s goals in life should be, and so on. Staying in the closet kept the rest of my world intact.

I know you’re thinking wtf, you’re a grown man, own your life!!! I grew up in an unstable family situation (we had many financial troubles and moved frequently), so I crave stability. Remaining in the closet and in the church were keys to maintaining that stability.

9) Squashing all my romantic and sexual feelings also shuts down most other feelings. I spent most of my 20’s & 30’s feeling numb, like I was watching life but not a part of it. I spent those years wishing I was dead, that a bus would hit me or a major disease would strike. Those kinds of deaths would end my misery and also be okay for my family because they wouldn’t have to know I’m gay. I recognize now how messed up that is.

10) The great source of happiness in those years was being an uncle. I’m the oldest of 7 children, my siblings had lots of babies born in those years. The joys of being an uncle only increased the pressure to stay in the closet and in the church because if I didn’t, my only source of happiness might be taken away.

11) I finally reached the point where I was tired of going through the motions of having a life. I was ready to come out. Rather than make some grand announcement, I decided to be honest with anyone who asked about my life. When someone tried to set me up with their friend, I would ask if she had a brother. As these sorts of situations came up, I was coming out to people one by one.

I didn’t exactly “come out” to my family. I figured since my parents had found the gay porn mag when I was a teen, and then gay porn malware on the computer when I was college student, they probably already knew (and they did, but were in denial). Also, I thought coming out would be saying I’m not trustworthy and an awful person for having pretended to be something I wasn’t for so long (not true, but that’s how I thought of it).

12) I’m such a late bloomer that I sometimes am embarrassed about it, especially now that so many people come out in their 20′s and even as teenagers. At the first Pride parade I attended, someone told me that we all come out when it’s right for us, and this was my time. I think that’s true.

13) Most of my adult life in church was being pianist in Primary. Shortly after I started telling people I’m gay is when I was called to be in the stake young men presidency. My stake president says he looked over at me playing piano one day and thought, “that man has much more to offer.” I wonder if it’s because I was more confident, my identities were less in conflict than they’d been in the past, I wasn’t afraid and hiding.

As stake young men president, I made sure I knew by name and something about every youth in the stake. I wanted them to know they were seen, they were heard, they were loved. Teens go through such hard things and I wanted to be a kind, supportive person in their life. Most youth don’t know who the stake youth leaders are, but they all knew me. Several told me about hard things in their life and some even came out to me. Parents of gay teens would come speak to me and I’d let them know life in church is hard and unfair, ways they could help support their teen, and prepared them that their child’s likely path would be out of the church. I felt like I bloomed in this calling and made a difference.

14) In 2015 marriage became legal for same-sex couples across the USA due to a Supreme Court ruling. I thought that finally the church would have to come to terms with it and accept it. But then came the November policy banning the children of gay couples from being members. It felt like a punch in the gut and I nearly walked away. I was still stake young men president and weighed whether the difference I made in this calling was worth putting up with how church clearly didn’t want me.

15) To help my parents buy a house, I had a bunch of their debt put into my name and I lived in the house with them. At the time it seemed a good way to avoid the loneliness of being on my own. But living with them also made walking away from the church tricky.

16) A month later I hit the 3-year mark of serving in the stake young men’s program, I was released from that and called to be stake executive secretary. My stake president told me that anyone can make appointments, but he wanted my unique viewpoint in all the highest councils of the stake. In this calling I occasionally meet general authorities and I speak with them about being gay in the church. My stake President recently joked that he has twice been a counselor in a stake presidency and now is a stake president, and in those years he’s met many general authorities, yet I have way more impact on them than he ever has.

17) Shortly after getting this new calling, in 2016 I started my tumblr blog. Eventually I used the blog as a way to examine, explore and record what it’s like to be gay in the LDS church. In some ways this blog is one giant pep talk to myself.

18) In 2017 my blog exploded, one of my posts went viral. It’s almost like God got tired of waiting on me, now I was out to everyone who knows me, and many more.

All of a sudden I had so many hurting Mormon LGBT people contacting me, most were teens and twenty-something’s. I’ve tried to help them, to affirm them. In many ways it feels like the years as stake young men president working with teens, the years I spent developing a spiritual independence, the studying & thinking about how being gay can work with the gospel, the fears & worries that are part of being in the closet, all of that prepared me for this.

19) Later in 2017 my mental health dived. I became suicidal. I started therapy. I finally had to face how harmed I’ve been by my time in church. I also had to admit I will never be enough in this church, I can never reach the goals & purpose of life as laid out by the church,. My therapist helped me see that I need another framework for what a successful life looks like and what would make for a joyful life.

In 2018 I was still in therapy and was diagnosed with social anxiety disorder, which partly explains why coming out and leaving the church were so difficult. The major driving motivation of this disorder is wanting to not disappoint people.

20) My therapist says I feel things more deeply than most people, but because I’d pushed down my feelings so long, it’s actually a bit scary to feel so much. I also started dating and trying to get gay friends. These sorts of big changes were hard for me. The psychologist said, in an amused tone, that I fully examine a path before I’m willing to take a step down it, meaning I’m cautious and slow to get going, but am certain when I begin of where I’m going.

21) Some of my family openly embraces me as gay and loves me no matter what. Some make their love and access to their children conditional on my being in church.

22) I thought 2018 would be the year I leave the church. There’s a personal reason I haven’t; I feel there’s one more thing to do, a friend whom I can help. That I came ahead to pave the way for this friend.

I know this all sounds crazy, talking about a voice telling me it’s okay to have gay relationships or that I have some missions in life to accomplish. That’s part of faith, I guess.

23) It’s unfair to say I’m still attending church for my friend. First, I don’t want him to feel any pressure. Second, it’s my decision, not his. I also am working on paying off debt so I can more easily live on my own, I’ve joined Affirmation and met a lot of LGBT Mormons/post-Mormons and feel like there’s something of a potential support group/friendships there. I’m thinking of changing jobs, even moving to a different university. In other words, I’m laying the groundwork to make any shift more smooth. Whether I take a breather from church or not, these are good things to do.

24) I’m in my 40′s and can see that in some important ways I’ve lived a stunted life. But I’m also able to use my voice to speak up for LGBT individuals inside the church, to try to make this little corner of church kinder and more receptive.

25) I can’t even imagine what you’re thinking of me. A hypocrite, someone who stays with an organization that contributed to my own mental health crisis. Someone too afraid to live. I can’t undo my past and all that lost time. I’ve made a lot of progress and am moving forward. I also believe and hope that things I share on this blog and things I say in my local church help LGBT members.

Maybe you can understand, maybe you can’t, why my life went so differently from yours. I’m certain you won’t agree with a number of decisions I made, but they were mine to make and they explain where I’m at now.

#David gets personal

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dxmagedrose · 4 years

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GET TO KNOW THE BLOGGER!

Tagged by: my lover @hammurabicomplex I’m tagging: anyone and everyone who wants to pick this one up! share with the class if you feel like it! tag me in it!!

PRESENTING. RANDOM DEEP DIVE WITH INDIGO-MUN AT 2AM ;

FIRST NAME Good fucking question… It’s (sort-of) currently Dylann! I was Kieran before that, though; it’s still used as one of my first names and I’m not used to Dylann quite yet bc I’ve just started using it.

Indigo is one of my middle names though, and I’ve used it as an online handle elsewhere forever so I use it here now! [ Fun etymology facts: Dylan(n) is a mythology name generally meaning “born of the wave” (aspiring diver & a water witch at heart). Kieran means “little dark one” bc of my love for horror, && I chose Indigo bc as a kid to be it was neither boy (blue) or purple (girl) and was both and neither as well as my absolute favorite color as this vibrant ass mystical color. ]

STRANGE FACT ABOUT YOURSELF hmmmmm…. I’m a horror lover at heart, so as a child (I wanna say 12), I was walking through an antique store (I have a few cool finds, I considered putting my other one as the fact tbh) and I turned the corner and I saw these two dolls staring back at me at the foot of the stairs of this antique building. my blood froze, and i felt my stomach drop. i got actual, physical goosebumps stumbling across these two creepy dolls staring back at me in the corner, and i couldn’t leave the store without them. perhaps the little painted porcelain boy would be somewhat spooky by himself if it wasn’t for the terrifying lidded gaze of the porcelain girl with the hairline fractures and slightly open lips. i cant look at her. i dont really find dolls scary, I like to find the spookier ones ones, and she makes me paranoid as hell. i keep her face covered and her up in my closet except for when i bring her out to show her off proudly as the spookiest thing I have but……. i dont really collect dolls anymore. even thinking about her brings a fearful tear to my eye. i don’t like to think about her for very long, but that’s why I’m so fucking proud to own her. ( YES — I’m THAT white person in the horror film )

TOP THREE PHYSICAL THINGS YOU FIND ATTRACTIVE ON A PERSON hhhhh a beardy jawline, high cheekbones, crooked canine teeth >:3c

A FOOD YOU COULD EAT FOREVER AND NOT GET BORED OF b.l.t.’s with avocado. ahhhh. my mouth is watering just thinking about it, oh my god. just a bit of salt and pepper???

A FOOD YOU HATE barbecue anything, i hate the taste of bbq sauce, you keep your nasty black goo to yourselves at the grill. twice in my life i have presented with barbecue pizza and both times i cried literal tears. why would you do such a horrible thing to a person? what kind of a monster are you? how do you sleep at night?!

GUILTY PLEASURE the sims. constantly. always. i’ve sunk thousands of hours into my households. oh also uhhhhhh i run two 80s horror blogs, one being a shitpost blog with occasional art of mine and one gremlin fanfic ship blog for horrible, terrible self indulgent fanfics i’ll get the courage to finish writing & post so i can be cancelled on tumblr for at some point. NO, i won’t link them. as i pretend they’re even all that hard to find, within a day i was found on both by someone i admire here a lot :’) ilu bby thnk u eternally for supporting ur local horrifying dumbass wtf

WHAT DO YOU SLEEP IN the same clothes i’ve been wearing all day usually, my sweats & long sleeve raglans or my hoodies. i like being cozy day & and out. and ugh. efoort. just throw me in a blanket in a cool room and im out.

SERIOUS RELATIONSHIPS OR FLINGS serious relationships with some openness or poly. i wish i could fling! just not exactly easy for demisexual autistics lmao.

IF YOU COULD GO BACK IN THE PAST AND CHANGE ONE THING ABOUT YOUR LIFE, WOULD YOU AND WHAT WOULD IT BE I think I would be adopted by my grandma as a kid. It would save me some trauma but mostly I think it would get my autism diagnosed way earlier and save me angsting all these years of wondering why & thinking it’s my fault I’m struggling so much and so loud and affectionate and different in a world that i didnt fit in the same way.

ARE YOU AN AFFECTIONATE PERSON when i get drunk i text people how much they mean to me in my life. does that answer your question? ahhh. i’m sometimes a cuddle monster with friends, i message people with long texts about how much they mean to me, but I sometimes really don’t like to be touched at all.

A MOVIE YOU COULD WATCH OVER AND OVER AGAIN FLYPAPER. F L Y P A P E R. FLYPAPER. FLY, and, I can’t stress this enough, fucking PAPER. ( Though also Whole Nine Yards and both Re-Animator & Bride ). I have watched Flypaper already like, 5 times this week and I’m still not done, and the other movies have been on repeat for days in this household within the last year. In the past it has also been Donnie Darko & the new Nightmare on Elm Street. roast me.

FAVORITE BOOK White Fang by Jack London. Have I actually ever finished it? No. Do I still own a copy I’ve had since childhood thru multiple dogs eating it, taking it to and from school, and highlighting and circling all the best parts of chapter one ever since I was a kid and it was too hard of a book for me to read? You bet your ass. If I ever need inspiration I just reread chapter 1. Although one of my other favorites was Broken Monsters by Lauren Beukes. But White Fang is like, a weirdly personal text. We stan London’s writing in this household.

YOU HAVE THE OPPORTUNITY TO KEEP ANY ANIMAL AS A PET, WHAT DO YOU CHOOSE FENNEC FOX!! I used to daydream about having my own named Shiloh when I was a lil kid. they’re adorable little things and i am obsessed. i mean, gimme any fox and im happy, marble foxes, red foxes… but I was obsessed with fennec foxes. Also tbh ferrets. I want a ferret.

TOP FIVE FICTIONAL SHIPS [IF YOU ARE AN RP BLOG, YOU CAN USE YOUR OWN SHIPS AS WELL] Rosa & @ninetyscnds‘s Luke, Rosa & @iimpulsivity is already screaming my name, Rosa & Constantine, Jesse & Andrea from Breaking Bad, and the joker and harley of 80s sci-fi Dan & Herbert from Re-Ani. I am but a simple opossum.

PIE OR CAKE Pie! I’ll take both pumpkin & melty apple over cake. also, cheesecake is more pie than cake soooo, pie wins.

FAVORITE SCENT my dogs / my blanket. :’) It’s the most grounding smell in the world.

CELEBRITY CRUSH oliver jackson-cohen, i’m fucking GAY and im angry about it. there i was, minding my own business, and i saw that asshole in a certain SHIRTLESS GIF and it AWOKE SOMETHING IN ME. dont talk to me about it, holy shit im obsessed with beardy men now god fuckkdafjaask i hate him why did he make me this gay i was perfectly fine being into girls but NOOOOOO him and his dumb hairy chest and sweet rugged face and I—— I also am obsessed with the archaeologist & television personality Josh Gates and may or may not be considering making a fan blog for him bc idk if my anthropology docuseries host is Dad or Daddy but i love him lots

IF YOU COULD TRAVEL ANYWHERE, WHERE WOULD YOU GO I would go on a dive with anthropologists and archaeologists doing fieldwork research in the ancient cenotes of the Yucatán Peninsula. My actual dream job, catch me crying & fantasizing about being underwater documenting Mayan skulls given as offerings. Fuckkkk, I love anthropology so much!! take me anywhere in the world to immerse myself into culture & archaeology.

INTROVERT OR EXTROVERT Introvert. I have a real life friend I see roughly once a month, and that’s it. Plenty of online relationships, I’m chatty, message me all day every day. but i dont do people well.

DO YOU SCARE EASILY I used to! Really bad. I don’t as much anymore. I do get paranoia a lot still. Having therapists telling you that the FBI could be outside your house watching you through your windows will kind of nervous. ( no google results for: yes hello fbi i am a writer please dont put me on watchlists i just have research i need to do for this idea im working on, would you like to try again? ) I have nightmares nightly but not they never make me afraid, they just make me feel like crap. jumpscares and loud noises and seeing people reaching into their pockets dont set off as many brain alarms anymore tho!! progress haha.

IPHONE OR ANDROID I like my android better bc of capabilities but meh

DO YOU PLAY ANY VIDEO GAMES My mom, her husband & I play COD for family game night, and Silent Hill is my life’s blood. I’ve sunken hours into Sims & Skyrim, and Norman Jayden from Heavy Rain is my #1 fictional character in existence, why do i love the druggie babies

DREAM JOB Oh… You’re asking me to pick? I’d love to be an anthropologist doing work out in the field. Underwater archaeology is peak, but I’m also heavily considering being a body recovery diver or police diver. I’d love to see myself in uniform someday, if possible. Just the thought makes me teary eyed & proud.

WHAT WOULD YOU DO WITH A MILLION DOLLARS fund my person creative & educational endeavors. get myself a spooky ass abandoned house to make my own home to create in, and travel to the world’s best dive sites. just live a mild life of education, creation & exploration. that’s the dream TM.

FICTIONAL CHARACTER YOU HATE dr. hill is a gross and whiny lil bitch this post brought to u by the miskatonic crew, how is everyone here an even worse bad guy than herbert west precious dan excluded talk shit get hit tho john winchester from spn and both walter white & todd from breaking bad are all in my crew of hated characters. i jusT… the reani novel is difficult to read because i have to deal with this old sack of shit.

FANDOM THAT YOU WERE ONCE A PART OF BUT AREN’T ANY LONGER Supernatural :-)

… AND THIS CONCLUDES A DEEP DIVE WITH INDIGO!! //

#||: && the mundane ( ooc );#( get to know a bitch!! )#( this was... a lot of me rambling about weirdly personal shit at 2 am )

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fvckhxbits · 5 years

Text

wow. [c.e]

a/n: chris has all my uwus and this is part four and the finale lmao

summary: so what happens when you finally kiss the love of your life?

word count: 1,889

warnings: I apologize if u prefer a different kind of juice; y’all im shook idk what im writing half the time; fluff if u squint; also wtf kind of summary man

It’s been weeks since you’ve spoken to Chris and yet here you are, standing in front of his door. Taking a deep breath, you knock aggressively before waiting and contemplating on if you should just leave now while you can. Before you can make a decision, the door cracks open and you give him a small smile. “Why the hell haven’t you been answering my calls?” He opens the door wider, inviting you inside but you know better and continue to stand in the same spot.

“Come in,” he says, motioning for you to come inside but you continue to stand there, frozen like a deer in headlights.

“I need to talk to you,” you inhale deeply and he stares at you for a long while before crossing his arms.

“Well, come inside and we can talk.” He raises a brow and moves aside for you to come inside and you forfeit, slipping inside and making a beeline to the living room. “So, what’s up?” He makes his way to the kitchen, knowing that you normally ask for a cup of juice of some sort. You don’t answer, chickening out on telling him how you really feel. When he sees you’re not going to talk, he continues, “So why haven’t you been answering my calls?”

You look over at him, “I-I’ve been busy,”

“Doing what?” He slips the cup of apple juice into your hand and when his fingers brush against your skin, you can’t help but relish the feeling and your hand twitches, wanting to grab his but you barely stop yourself.

“Stuff,” you nonchalantly answer which is better than you expected. You shrug and take a sip the apple juice as he looks at you, scanning your face. You shift in discomfort and turn away from him. “So, what’s her name?”

“I missed you,” he ignores your question and your heart buzzes in a way you can’t describe. You can hear him stepping closer and your heart accelerates to the point where you nearly can’t hear anything except for his footsteps coming up from behind you.

“Chris,” you whisper, turning towards him.

“Like, really missed you,” he stares at you and his hand is hovering over your upper arm. Your skin is begging to be touched by him, to be wooed and relished in every sense. You’re subconsciously biting your lip when you lean up slightly to look at him and the next thing you know, you’re kissing him like your life depended on it because it was starting to feel like it did.

That was a rule you two had made when you decided to start fucking around was to not ever kiss on the lips. It was mainly because it was a symbol for romantic love and it didn’t make sense to kiss each other on the lips if you weren’t romantically involved. It was a rule made for good measures but damn, you’d be lying if you said you hadn’t wanted to break that rule since day one.

“Chris?” A voice echos through the house and you’re pushing him away, grabbing the apple juice and slinging yourself over the couch, careful not to spill the juice. He takes a little longer to process what just happened and clears his throat, “In here,”

You had known about his long dating history but you weren’t expecting to see his long time ex, Minka. She was the longest person he had been with and no doubt he still had feelings for her. Obviously, you tell yourself, why the fuck else would he be with her, dumbass.

“Hey,” she smiles and makes her way over to him, kissing him on the cheek and he looks uncomfortable when he smiles back and wraps his arm around her waist.

“This is [Y/N],” Chris steps away from her for a second and you smile weakly, giving her a small smile of acknowledgement.

“So this is [Y/N],” she smiles and makes her way over to you. “I’m Minka,” she holds out her hand for you to shake and stupidly, you high five her instead. Her smile fades and she looks at Chris like is she okay and you swallow hard, turning back to your apple juice. “Nice to finally meet you,” she says and you ignore her, unsure of how to react so instead you just nod, still sipping on the juice. “So...” She turns back to Chris and smiles brightly, “are you ready?”

“For?” Chris looks at her in confusion and she laughs it off.

“Our date,” she reminds him and the lightbulb goes off in his head. “Right,” he looks over at you as if trying to gage your reaction. “Thanks for coming over to watch Dodger for me on such short time,” Chris adds and you look up over at him, offering him a small smile.

“Anything for a friend,”

“I’ll see you in a few hours then.” He grabs his jacket and takes Minka’s offered hand. She swings his hand a little as they make their way out of his place. You sigh, letting out a frustrated scream which echos and Dodger happily yips, making his way towards you. He bounces up onto the couch and you rub his belly, “At least you love me, don’tcha bubba,” you mumble and he happily wags his tail at the attention he’s receiving.

After Dodger falls asleep to your addictive petting, you slip off the couch and make your way to Chris’ room. You purse your lips as you peek inside and find it to be in the same condition that it was the last time you were here--clean but of course, Dodger’s loyal lion slumped on the floor beside the foot of the bed. You smile softly before mindlessly trailing into his room and you walk past his closet, hands brushing against the soft materials. You smile and inhale deeply, savoring the scent of his cologne. You make your way to his bed, falling down onto it as you splay your body on his cool sheets.

The bed dips and you look to find Chris hovering over you with that smirk of his and you instinctively reach to grab his arm, biting your lip. He smiles at the sight of you and leans down to press a feather-like kiss on your neck. “Chris,” your voice is soft, almost pleading and he moves, his hands gliding up your body from your hips, then under your shirt until he’s pulling it off. As he tosses it aside, you reach for the button on his jeans and make quick work of trying to slide them off of him. He chuckles a little when you attempt to strategically shove his pants off with your feet but sorta failed. “You’re cute,” he whispers, assisting you before he leans back over to press kisses on your hips, then your waist, then your breasts and lastly, your lips. You greedily accept, Minka being the last thing on your mind. “I love you.” You whisper when he pulls back with his lips millimeters away from yours.

You wake in a jolt, looking around at your surroundings with a cold sweat. “The fuck,” you whisper and slide off his bed, making your way out to the living room to check on Dodger who is still sound asleep and you notice that it’s dark out. Jesus, you make your way back to his room in search for some clothes, knowing he secretly kept clothing for you in case something ever happened. You grab a shirt and some undies, then steal a towel before stepping into his glorious bathroom. If you could live in his bathroom, you would. It was twice as big as your own bedroom and it made you envy Chris for the gorgeous house he obtained through his hard work. As you strip, you turn on the water and are oblivious to the sound of the front door closing.

Chris can hear the shower in his bedroom running and he smiles to himself a little. He tosses his keys into the bowl and trudges over to Dodger’s sleeping form and strokes that one part behind his ear. Dodger is stirred awake and he yips at the sight of his dad. Chris laughs and kisses his son on the top of his head, “Missed ya too bubba,” Chris grins and continues to pet Dodger while he paws at his dad affectionately.

“Where’s your lion?” Chris smiles and Dodger whines, flopping his head to one side as if he couldn’t understand what his dad was asking. “Ya big baby,” Chris laughs and stands, heading into his bedroom and grabbing the lion, not before catching a glimpse of your naked form. You’re drying yourself and humming softly and his cock twitches at the same time, his heart thuds in his chest loudly. Chris’ phone slips out of his pocket and hits the carpeted floor, making a dull noise loud enough that you can hear. You flinch, eyes wide as you attempt to pull on your clothes quickly in case someone had broken into Chris’ house which later on you realize didn’t make sense because he lived in a gated neighborhood.

You make quick work to call Chris and of course, his phone blares loudly in the same room as you and you peek your head out to see Chris standing there like an idiot, in the middle of picking up his phone with the stuffed lion tucked under his arm. “Hi,” he laughs a little and you breathe heavily.

“Jesus fuck,” you grumble, opening the bathroom door wider so you can leave. “Fucking scared me,” you trudge out, hand on your hip as you end the call.

“I dunno what Jesus has to--oof,” he looks at you and is met with a pillow to the face.

“Shut up,” you snort and snatch the lion out of his hand. “Is Dodger--”

Dodger yips at the sound of his name and you smile. “What is it bubba?” You ask him and he howls in response before galloping into the bedroom, rolling over onto his back. “Hey baby,” you say in a baby voice and hand him his trusty lion before he goes ham on it. Now with Dodger distracted, it’s easier for Chris to bring up the kiss so you quickly stand, “I’m gonna get outta your hair now,” you make quick work of grabbing your things but he stops you.

“So what, you’re just going to pretend like what you did, didn’t happen?”

You turn around, feeling as if he was attacking you so you immediately become defensive. “I--”

He interrupts you by pressing his lips to yours and you’re kissing him back with so much passion and emotion. You feel like you’re about to fall apart, burst with love and you honestly don’t know what you’re feeling. All you know is that he’s kissing you like his life depended on it and you’re doing the same. You’ve never had a kiss that compared to anything like this and Chris’d be lying if he said this kiss didn’t make him dizzy. “Jesus fuck,” he whispers as he parts from you momentarily.

“I dunno what Jesus has to do with this,” you whisper and he can’t help but kiss you again and again, pulling you close to his body.

[previous]

[masterlist]

#Chris evans #Chris evans x reader #Chris evans x chubby reader #Chris evans x plus size reader #imagine #probably angsty #angst #reader #reader insert #lmao back at it again #this is honestly going on for a lot longer than I was expecting #not gonna lie I played yall #featuring Dodger #the sweetest boi

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