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waltzingwithspirit · 8 months

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PICK A CARD: MESSAGES FROM THE SUPER BLUE MOON

Left: 111; Right 333 Disclaimer: Take what resonates and leave the rest. You are not allowed to copy my work under any circumstances. All personal readings are paid. All thing mentioned in disclaimer in my pinned posts applies here.

🌑111🌑

You are worried about something that you have just started or will begin soon. It could be college, job offers, but something has you worried. You are doubting everything suddenly and no matter what you do or where you go, it creeps up on you. You need to observe, the more you reject the awareness of the negative thoughts, it feels the more powerful they get. Do not think yourself as the thinker of the thoughts, you are a mere observer, so identify as such, tell them, now that they have spoken, now you are aware of them , and later say ‘ I do not consent to this’ and let it be. The key is to simply observe not control and when they do not get the attention they so wanted, they’ll leave you be. You are extremely intelligent, mental gymnastics is your thing, some of you are good chess players, logical, love to deduce things. Here you are being told to use your creativity, you have being given a tool, whatever that might be in your specific case, you are being told to use to to go to calm waters, or the ruffled ones will wash all over you. Do not be afraid of the shadow, see it, learn from it. Acceptance is key here, for a lot of you, denial is your coping mechanism, but it is not working in your favour anymore. You have suppressed feelings for too long and now they want to come up, clear limiting beliefs, become aware of them. THIS IS THE BEGINNING OF YOUR SHADOW WORK JOURNEY(for a lot of you). There is more to the problem, like you can’t even put your finger on it, there is self doubt, you go one way and the other seems more like it, you are in a mental maze, what is your strength is not applying here and you my friend, are frustrated, FIND A NEW ANGLE, A NEW WAY. For you are dealing with the subconscious, not an easy fae. (The messages won’t stop, if I go on, I’ll go on forever) COMMENT' 111' to claim healing. 🌙DM for a personal tarot reading to heal your shadows.🌙

🌕333🌕

Word channeled: GRATITUDE JOUNRAL.

You have a lack mindset. No matter how much balance you achieve, or growth, you focus on what you don’t have and let that affect how you feel about the rest. The main important thing is money, you feel insecure about it, at this point, you just want a lottery or someone to spoil you. You are tired and desperate. You are being told to see abundance in other areas, like look at this example: person sitting in the shade of the tree crying, all they think is if I had some money, I could buy an apple, what he doesn’t realises is the tree he is sitting underneath is the apple tree. You have it right there. Sometimes, abundance is you, your skills to get the fruit. Whether you buy a dress or make one, at the end you still have a dress, and during the process, you still have to make effort, whether at the dress or somewhere else. BASIC NECESSITIES ARE OF COURSE NECESSARY, but this is not we are talking about. This is different, someone blaming and self pitying. You are being told to keep a gratitude journal, the more you thank for recieving the more the universe gives. It only understands the word yes. So if you say ‘I am poor’ it is so be it. So affirm good things especially while eating, me mindful to not watch anything while eating because it goes straight to the food, whatever they are saying on the tv. ESPECIALLY NO NEWS AND CRIME DRAMAS. The good news is you are almost there, almost there to reaching equilibrium, at the end it’s all about balance and trust me when I say, it’s not far away. Keep focusing on the good, be happy with what you have while working towards what you want. This is healthy attitude, remember the universe does not respond well to desperation. COMMENT' 333' to claim healing. 🌙DM for a personal tarot reading to heal your shadows.🌙

EL TAROT

#pick a picture #pick a pile #pick an image #pac reading #pick a card reading #ask response #pick a photo #pick a card #pac tarot #free tarot #blue moon #blue

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overgrown3d · 9 months

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What do you need to hear right now?

✨How to select your pile?✨

1. Slow your breathing, taking deep inhales. Focus on feeling present in your environment.

2. Looking from left to right, use your intuition to pick the pile meant for you (what you connect most with.)

3. Doesn't resonate? No worries! Pick another, it's message may be just right for you.

• • •

pile 1 -> pile 2

-> Pile 3

Pile 1 ;

Cards: 6 of Swords, Queen of Wands, 2 of Wands, Knight of Wands, The Tower (base)

"You have the strength to move forward, Keep going!"

The biggest obstacle in your life right now may be your thoughts. Perhaps you have tried to change or improve certain aspects in your life, particularly the actions you perform to meet your goals, and feel burdened with insecurity as you face hardships and deal with your circumstances. Maybe you've tried to change your life in the past but got disheartened, believing you weren't capable of overcoming your struggles. It seems that you've nurtured an idea, business, relationship, habit, or any action that isn't serving you anymore now that you've grown outside of it. Like building a foundation on unsafe lands, only after an event happens do you realize that it is time to bring about change for your own sake, and rebuild your life on stronger soil. Realizing this may cause a great deal of pain for you, but this change will be fruitful in the end.

~~~~🍃

There is indecision in what next step you should take, but know that you've overcome the greatest leap of all: The first step. You absolutely do have courage to shake off the shackles of your past, whatever they may be. What's next in store for you is a lot of action, but this time with the right decisions and choices.

We all have different circumstances in life, what we need to do is make the best out of it, with whatever we've got. 💚

~~~~🍃

Pile 2 ;

Cards: 10 of Swords, The Emperor, Justice, 3 of swords, 7 of swords, Ace of Wands & The Fool (base)

"You must look like a fool before becoming the master."

Get to work, baby! The message you need to hear right now is get into action! You've got the m-fing chances to be successful! This signals massive career change or great profits. You may have healed or are in the process of healing from a catastrophic event, leaning into a lot of internal questioning, perhaps overcoming grief or loss. You may be exploring different careers you can pursue, or areas of study. You got to take action despite your hesitance to new beginnings, and there will be a great need for discipline, learning new techniques, acquiring skills to master your area in interest. Most likely you will need to sacrifice your hedonist tendencies, maybe even a person that is unbelieving in you, and whatever else is holding you back. I'm hearing "necessary sacrifice". I'm getting the vibe that this could be a business, freelance work, maybe a very demanding job that you considered doing. Delve into uncharted territories and keep reconsidering your career path if you question it being right for you. Your strength relies greatly on your ability to start, now you just need to GO! GO!GO!

~~~~🍃

Pile 3 ;

Cards : 10 of wands, Knight of Pentacles, The Star, Knight of Cups, Ace of Swords (rev)

"You are your biggest investment"

Focus on yourself more, man! It's likely that you're burdened with too many tasks and responsibilities, possibly some from a partnership? Get more in touch with your emotions, your relationships, with yourself, dammit!!! I'm getting massive workaholic vibes here, and that applies to all forms of labor btw! Give yourself a break, you deserve it so much. Neglect your logical, ultra-efficient side for now, because I guarantee that getting a break from your responsibilities (Maybe you are the breadwinner, caretaker, student, or an ambitious person trying to kickstart a business) will produce greater financial success/less financial burden. It's possible you're stressing too much about money, but to you, that stress is reasonable. Let go of the thoughts that limit you to your area of work, and start exploring more of your identity and emotions. You will be able to make a lot of progress with this balance. 💚

~~🍃 You reached the end of the reading, 'till next time!

#tarot reading #tarotcommunity #pick a card #pac #tarotblr

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femmefatalevibe · 2 years

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Femme Fatale Playbook: How To Cultivate Self-Regard (In Every Area Of Life)

How to live with self-respect in every aspect of life. Here's your ultimate guide to living in your dark feminine energy.

Living with self-regard (or self-respect) means understanding that you cannot pour from an empty cup and the importance of making yourself your #1 priority. Feeling your best also has a domino effect. You become a better friend, boss, sibling, parent, child, lover, etc. when you feel comfortable with yourself and content in your own skin. Of course, some of these practices will apply to more than one area of life (ex. Sleep improves your physical and mental health and a good night’s rest can also be considered an act of self-care), but these principles/examples are divided up to streamline these tips. Enjoy xx

Areas of Life:

Career

Self-Care/Self-Development

Finances

Physical Health

Mental Health/Emotional Well-Being

Sexual Health/Sexuality & Sensuality

Relationships (All Types - Friends, Family, Work, Intimate)

Career:

Discover what you love: Find the subject matters, industries, and a way of adding value that lights you up inside. Take a job or get creative in your methodology to make this area of interest into your career.

Set clear goals: Do I want to work at a particular company? What position/title? Do I want to go out on my own – who are my dream clients, work volume, lifestyle, business structure, income? Write all these details down and strategize small, practical daily tasks/habits to reach your goal.

Build an indispensable skillset: Research, case-building, copywriting, strategic planning, computer programming, sales, data analytics, etc. Learn transferable skills to guarantee you'll always have something valuable to bring to the table in our ever-changing world/work culture. Start with one and accumulate more as you work towards self-mastery.

Know your worth: Negotiate – your salary, rates, workday structure, corporate benefits, PTO, etc. Never let someone have you begging for breadcrumbs or the bare minimum.

Speak up (when necessary): Communicate – clearly, directly, and assertively. Don't let someone walk all over you. Finish your sentences with certainty even if someone tries to interrupt you while you're speaking. Advocate for yourself, whether you're trying to secure a promotion, a new project, a proposed solution for a client, or taking a necessary break. Also, know when it's in your best interest to stay silent. Ensure your integrity remains intact. The truth of a matter speaks volumes.

Organize your day (Prioritize!): Set yourself up to win by outlining your priorities first before others' tasks and projects consume your mind and calendar. List your top 3 to-dos for the day that are non-negotiables for you and will inch you closer to your goals. I recommend the Productivity Planner for daily use.

Keep records: Have email records and call notes regarding every interaction and decision written down. This practice enables you to stand your ground when necessary and saves you a lot of trouble.

Set boundaries: Proudly affirm your 'no' to a project, any disrespectful comment, or too many nights of overtime work. Schedule and stick to your breaks and the time you clock out (within reason, of course). Never allow a company or endeavor to run you into the ground at the expense of your mental or physical health.

Make connections: Cultivating a network of mentors, colleagues, and peers in the same or adjacent fields is priceless. These connections can lead to new opportunities, provide a healthy and productive space to explore ideas, or generally vent and exchange advice. Strike up that conversation at lunch or an event. Follow up with a LinkedIn request or thoughtful email. You never know what this conversation might lead to and the opportunities it can bring.

Self-Care/Self-Development:

Create daily/weekly rituals: Establish ones that add a little joy and streamline your day. These habits can range from a 10-minute yoga or meditation session every morning, to practicing morning pages or a daily shadow work prompt, reading 10 pages daily, getting your steps in, and planning your tasks, lunch, and outfit for the next day the night before to creating a weekly house-cleaning schedule or meal planning. Discover systems that allow you to put yourself first and set you up to win the day.

Find ways to feel beautiful: Create luscious skincare, shower, and hair/makeup/nail routines that make you feel like a queen. Invest in well-fitting, high-quality wardrobe staples. Make your favorite cup of coffee or tea daily. Keep your signature scent on hand. Exfoliate. Invest in matching pajama sets.

Indulge all of your senses: Light a candle. Put on a moody playlist to relax, focus, unwind, or turn you on – any melody that suits the occasion and gets you in the zone. Take a bubble bath or do a face mask. Relish in a warm beverage or a healthful, comforting meal. Use silk pillowcases, hair ties, and bed sheets. Pamper yourself with small everyday luxuries.

Expand your knowledge: Make it a priority to read a few articles and 10 pages of a book daily. Being educated on different topics and the world provides you with personal fulfillment and enables you to enter into a wider pool of conversations. This practice also strengthens your mind, sharpens focus, and helps your brain relax.

Explore your interests: Learn what subjects and activities light you up inside. Whether it's painting, dancing, tennis, spin classes, learning about ancient world history, politics, fashion, science, etc. Take time to study and practice in these areas of interest.

Embrace your creative side: Write, read, draw, create a mood board, explore Pinterest or Tumblr, style outfits, organize a section of your room, cook a new recipe, make a playlist – any fun activity that ignites creativity.

Plan dates for yourself: Take yourself out for coffee, lunch, a shopping date, or even a mini vacation. You deserve to enjoy experiences and derive pleasure from enjoying these life moments without worrying about anyone but yourself.

Remember to rest: Getting 7-8 hours of sleep nightly and taking breaks is essential for productivity and overall well-being. Never feel guilty for allowing your body and mind to recover. Neglecting rest only backfires if you're playing the long-term game.

Finances:

Know your income/expense ratio: Ensure you know exactly how much money is coming in and going out every month. Create a personal balance sheet to audit your financial well-being.

Track everything: Keep a record of every stream of income and where every dollar is going – expenses, savings, estimated taxes, investments, charity, etc.

Have a set emergency fund: Between 3-12 months of expenses should be ready in a high-yield savings account at all times. If you have a family or are self-employed, aim for 6-12 months of necessary savings to stay sane. Saving this amount of money takes time. Be patient, and cut back on frivolous expenses if needed for the short term. It's an act of self-care.

Invest (especially in a Roth IRA or backdoor Roth IRA): Set one up through Vanguard or Fidelity ASAP if you have not already. Don't underestimate the importance of compound interest on your financial future and security.

Automatically pay yourself first: Automate a portion of your paycheck to savings and your investments, so you never see this money. Pay yourself first before spending (on anything but necessities).

Always max out your 401K employer-matching: Make sure you know what percentage your employer will match and always meet this investment requirement. Do yourself the favor. It's literally free money.

Only spend on your essentials & what you actually enjoy: Invest in pleasurable items and activities strategically. Only spend on additional experiences and products that add value to your life. Cut unfulfilling expenses.

Read about personal finance/speak with your brokerage firm: Take time to read about these topics and learn everything your parents didn't teach you or were not taught at school. Use licensed professionals (CPAs, brokerage firms, etc.) as a resource, too, for your personal goals.

Use savings plug-ins/discount codes

Physical Health:

Cook/eat healthy meals: At least 80% of the time. Focus on eating whole foods and a (mainly) plant-based diet. I've been vegan for 10 years and it's done wonders for my body, skin, and mental clarity.

Drink plenty of water daily: Set a target of ounces = to your weight in pounds. Incorporate lemon, lime, orange wedges, or frozen berries if necessary to keep this habit interesting.

Find workouts you love: Whether that's low-impact like pilates, yoga, walking or dance classes, spin classes, weight-lifting, etc. The best exercise routine is the one you can gladly maintain.

Make daily movement a priority: At least 15-30 minutes daily. I aim for 10-12K steps at least 5 days a week.

Limit processed foods, alcohol, cigarettes

Step outside: Get at least 10 minutes of sun daily, weather permitting. Always wear sunscreen.

Sleep Well: Aim for 7-8 hours (Create a sleep hygiene routine!)

Maintain proper hygiene: Shower daily, moisturize, wash your hair on your necessary schedule, brush your body from head to toe, etc.

Do pelvic floor exercises: It does wonders for your bladder and helps to satisfy your libidinal energy.

Go to your annual appointments: Primary doctor/Obgyn/Dentist/Dermatologist

Mental Health/Emotional Well-Being:

Meditate: Some of my favorite ones are linked HERE (for anxiety), HERE, (focus/productivity), and HERE (feminine/sexual energy).

Journal: Do a daily shadow work prompt, gratitude journal exercise, or practice morning pages (stream of consciousness journaling for 3 pages every morning).

Read: 10 pages of a self-development/psychology book, at least 3-5 articles, or a chapter of a fiction or non-fiction book. Daily.

Take breaks: A 10-minute walk, a real lunch break, listening to music, making coffee. Something pleasurable to recenter your focus and energy.

Discover movement you love: Walking and dancing are your best friends.

Keep your space clean: Wipe off all surfaces and put things away daily. Keep your desk organized. Clean and put away the dishes before bed. Stick to a house cleaning schedule.

Make to-do/bullet-point lists: For every area of life – work, chores, groceries, other items you need, wishlists, activities, and hobbies you want to pursue

Schedule and plan out your week: House cleaning, laundry, work project management, email time blocking, appointments, beauty routines, workouts, etc.

Create non-negotiables: Sleep, daily walks, a healthy dinner, your skincare routine, a 15-minute shower – whatever must-do rituals you need to look and feel your best every day.

Connect with your inner circle: Make a deliberate effort to stay in touch and catch up with those who are loyal and have your best interest at heart. Make time to chat on the phone, send a text, or better yet –get coffee, lunch, drinks, or dinner weekly with at least one person who you know makes your life richer in some type of way.

Put restrictions on social media/screen time: Use your settings to limit your time on certain apps (Instagram, Twitter, Tik Tok, Facebook, etc.). I set mine for 2 hours a day. Stop checking email right before bed and first thing in the morning (at least try really hard not to –I'm so guilty of this one!).

Give freely: Be generous with those who you love, mentors, and mentees. Everyone appreciates when you put a little effort into giving someone a small thoughtful gift, doing a kind gesture, or lending an ear. It makes you feel good and can make someone's day, week, month, or year.

Set boundaries: Take time for yourself – to recharge, indulge in solo activities, have some fresh air, breathe, or sit in silence. Give freely with no expectations, but never overextend yourself. When seeking to know whether you're striking the right balance between giving and gatekeeping your energy ask yourself: Am I being kind, or do I feel like I'm losing a piece of myself when engaging with this person/attending this event? Be honest with yourself. Listen to and follow your initial gut reaction.

Go to therapy: If you can afford it, weekly (or bi-weekly, monthly) sessions are a game-changer for self-discovery, emotional regulation, and general happiness/life fulfillment.

Sexual Health/Sexuality & Sensuality:

Let go of shame: Internalize your right to pleasure. Claim ownership over this aspect of your life. It gives you confidence in and outside of the bedroom, so you move through the world with a magnetic aura and powerfully feminine energy.

Own your sexuality and preferences: Embrace who and what you're attracted to. This principle extends from your sexual orientation to your libido, turn-ons (fantasies, adult content, steamy memories, etc.), preferred positions, kinks, and devices. Sexuality and arousal are so personal. Allow yourself to be free of stigmas for the things you do in private. No one needs to know how you derive pleasure behind closed doors (unless it's a partner who's involved, of course).

Make time for self-pleasure and exploration (at least weekly): Understanding that you're in control of your own pleasure is empowering. Learning what you like is essential for sexual gratification – whether you're alone or sharing the experience with a partner.

Allow the mind-body connection to be your friend, not your enemy: Sex starts in the mind, so this point is important for climaxing. Get out of your head and into your body. Learning to enjoy your own body is a sign of self-respect.

Keep everything clean & hygienic: Only wash inside with water (no steaming!), clean any toys, and use protection. Safety and self-regard go hand-in-hand.

Find products & habits that make you feel beautiful: Invest in lingerie, sheets, perfume, body lotions, candles, wine, etc. that make you feel confident while in the mood.

Engage in playful & creative activities: Don't be shy about (safe and consensual) experimentation (I'll leave this to your imagination) and activities to build up tension, like a romantic dinner or a dancing session beforehand to make this area of your life more exciting and fulfilling.

Relationships:

Communicate expectations: Clearly and often with any individual in your life. Listen and respond. Don't react. Validate emotions when necessary. If someone cannot do the same, understand that it's almost always a sign of projection. Remain calm and confident in yourself. Always command and show up to others with the highest level of respect.

Have empathy, but not at your own expense: Live with respect and consideration for others, but remember your life is for YOU. Beware of guilt-trippers. Don't take the bait.

Set boundaries: Uphold them unapologetically. Seek to understand others' needs and boundaries, so you can be considerate of their needs too. Empathy and kindness come from a place of self-respect. They are not the same people-pleasing.

Be generous (but don’t overextend yourself): See above in the mental health section.

Be true to yourself: Authenticity is essential to personal fulfillment. Live in your uniqueness. Remember: trying to be someone else doesn't work, she's already taken. You have so much value to offer this world. Let your queen energy shine through. Live your truth. Remain self-assured. Be unapologetically you.

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ravenwitch45 · 4 months

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Ok so you know how striker was lit on fire I'm the new episode? Can j request headcanons where striker comes back to his house and his female s/o helps him? Feel free to ignore

(Yeah good lord, I felt so bad when that happened, he deserved it and I don't blame Blitz but man, how desperate and scared he seemed by it fucking hurt, so love this idea, I'll do my best to give the cowboy some comfort.)

Striker getting help from his Fem SO with his burns, reluctantly XP

Striker practically slammed the door open before closing it, startling you greatly, his clothes were singed and his tail was wrapped around his waist, a burn mark on the tip showing why he was avoiding dragging it across the ground, a very disgruntled look on his face

"What the hell happened?! Are you okay?!"You exclaim, causing him to groan a bit "Nothing! A job just went a little so-south that's all"He grumbles awkwardly, you of course say that's bullshit noting the several burn on his body and clothing and he's too tired to argue with you.

You settle for getting him to sit down so you could help with the burns, pulling out some cool burn gel to place on the burns after he strips down with some difficulty to show you it all, you can't fix the clothes a seamster is probably what he needs but that can wait.

He growls at the sting and chill as you apply the gel at every burn, the one on his tail being particularly difficult as he keeps squirming and rattling it, making you pin it down so you could actually do it, which he grumbles at of course, even more so when you tell him he'll have to try not to move his tail all that much so he doesn't fling the gel off.

Striker is far from a nice patient, but he's not fighting you much either, just complaining and groaning which you ignore both, cause you know he needs this if he doesn't want these wounds for longer then necessary, maybe even avoid them scarring too badly if at all.

You wish he called you when it happened, since a quick application helps more but you don't complain, your just glad he's alive and not sick from the wounds getting infected or something. You still got to him relativley quick.

Eventually you finish apply stuff on all the burns you can see with him just in his boxers before asking if there's any other burns you should know about, he stiffens at that before saying no, and you immediately know he's lying.

You know the routine well enough, so you just ask where it is? His eyes widen but he still shakes his head, refusing to say it, too embarassing so you ask again and he snaps "Why do you care so much?! I can do it myself Y/N! Haven't you helped enough with the aftermath of me being pathetic already!"

You go silent for a second before raising a brow "Okay first, I'm helping you Striker, there's no reason to be like that, and second, in no way are you pathetic! What got that idea in your head?"

"Because I keep losing Y/N! Whenever a job puts me up against them, or anyone with a decent bit of skill, I lose horribly and end up having to run away with my fucking tail between my legs, I keep getting humliated!"

"Having a run of bad luck doesn't make you pathetic, Losing some fights doesn't either, what matters is that your alive for satan's sake! I know how quick death happens around here, so you surviving is strong in my eyes."You counter making him grumble

"I... I just hate not being strong enough, or smart enough it's just... I hate feeling this weak sometimes."The cowboy admits before you hug him, making sure to not irritate any of his burns "Your not weak, it's strong to live to fight again another day, and I'm sure you'll win this one day, one way or another, just let yourself rest, and give yourself some grace Striker."

He awkwardly nods, thanking you with a slight blush on his face and you say your welcome before smirking, "Now where's the last burn Striker?" causing him to sigh as he grips the elastic of his boxers "Not a word after we're done, ya hear?"

"No promises."

#ask reply #helluva boss #helluva striker #helluva striker x reader #x reader #helluva boss x reader #suggestive at the end #if you know why you know XP

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pub-lius · 2 months

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Hey, so recently I saw a post about the misogyny of hamilton, so I wanted to ask you if it was true. Not the part of misogyny (because in that time it was normal, I guess), but rather how much was? (does make sense?), did it affect the relationship with eliza or with her daughters?

Thankyu!!! (Muak)

hm okay so im not completely sure what you mean but i am going to do my darndest

So, in the time period which Hamilton was alive, which is the latter half of the 18th century, there definitely was a profound attitude of misogyny, but it was very different from what we know today. Most of our idea of sexism comes from the religious revivals of the 20th century (and people who know me know how i feel about the godforsaken 20th century when it comes to history). This is yk your typical idea of a housewife being at home, taking on the burdens of homemaking and child rearing and basically keeping everything together at home while the husband worked a stressful 9 to 5 and didn't do shit at home and weaponized incompetence and implicit biases and yadayada

This was not the case in the 18th century! 18th century gender roles are very different from what we're used to, and even more different than what the Victorians and Edwardians considered the norm. This is especially visible in Hamilton's relationship with women, so I'm quite excited to talk about this.

Firstly, I want to talk about the joker to my batman: Ron Chernow. A major theory he supports in his biography of Hamilton is the two sided nature of Hamilton's perception of women. He says that there is a clear distinction between two "types" of women in Hamilton's wife-- the good, Christian mistress of the house and the stupid, mentally unstable skank. These are his terms. I want to hit him in the head with a brick.

"Together, the two eldest [Schuyler] sisters formed a composite portrait of Hamilton's ideal woman, each appealing to a different facet of his personality. Eliza reflected Hamilton's earnest sense of purpose, determination, and moral rectitude, while Angelica exhibited his worldly side- the wit, charm, and vivacity that so delighted people in social intercourse." -Ron Chernow, Alexander Hamilton, page 133

Yeah, this is horseshit. It gets worse when he compares Elizabeth Hamilton and Maria Reynolds on page 367, but I'm not going to get started because I won't stop. And this isn't about him anyway.

Instead, I want to talk about WHY this is horseshit. First of all, even Alexander "thinks with the wrong head" Hamilton didn't have this fucked up mindset, because it is heavily based in 20th century evangelicalism that didn't even exist in Hamilton's world.

Yes, obviously there was religious attitudes that condemned certain actions from women, but this was not as intense as in later periods. In the 18th century, an upperclass woman, such as Elizabeth Hamilton, would be responsible for maintaining the household, but this meant being in charge of the servants rather than doing the work herself. The work she did do would be maintaining the finances and the family's reputation.

Reputation was everything in the 18th century, and this especially applied to women. Not only did they have to maintain their own reputations, but they had to raise their children to have the skills necessary to do the same, and often had to fill in for their husbands in this department if they held public office. It's very difficult to maintain your reputation if you're beating people with walking sticks in the Continental Congress.

When it came to lower and middle class women, their jobs weren't different in that they carried an equally important role in the family. They would be doing household chores just as well as their husband, and these weren't easy chores that made women "feeble". They very often took a lot of physical strength and endurance, and it wasn't considered unladylike for women to do "men's" chores while their husbands were away. This isn't to say that women in later eras didn't do the same, but it wasn't as publicly frowned upon.

Hamilton had a very unique perspective as he was witness to both sides of this coin. His mother, a single, working class mother would be juggling both the man and woman's role. I think it was really this background that allowed him to have a much more informed perspective on womanhood. He was one of the few men in this period that I've seen write from the perspective of a woman, specifically a grieving mother.

"For the sweet babe, my doting heart Did all a mother's fondness feel; Careful to act each tender part And guard from every threatening evil. But what alas! availed my care? The unrelenting hand of death, Regardless of a parent's prayer Has stopped my lovely infant's breath-" -Papers of Alexander Hamilton, volume 1, page 43.

Chernow attributes this to Hamilton's deeply empathetic nature, which is fair, however I think it also shows that he was able to understand a woman's experience specifically.

I say this because Hamilton does tell us a little bit about exactly what was expected of women in the time during Elizabeth's first pregnancy in a letter that is usually used to call him a sexist, but I think it's a little more complex than that. Here's the excerpt:

"You shall engage shortly to present me with a boy. You will ask me if a girl will not answer the purpose. By no means. I fear, with all the mothers charms, she may inherit the caprices of her father and then she will enslave, tantalize and plague one half [the] sex, out of pure regard to which I protest against a daughter. So far from extenuating your offence this would be an aggravation of it." -Alexander Hamilton to Elizabeth Hamilton, October 12, 1781

In this letter, Hamilton isn't telling Elizabeth that he wants a boy to inherit his fortune, to carry on his name, or the other reasons that were given by his contemporaries for preferring sons over daughters. He specifically states that his reasons are his fear that his traits will be passed onto his children, and that if its a daughter, she will be more discriminated against than his son because of her sex. Essentially, it was easier to be a gay son in the 18th century than a thot daughter. In that question, Hamilton would choose gay son because he knew that men were generally less criticized than women.

So, I'm not saying Hamilton wasn't sexist, because, by definition, he was. He was taught that women were fundamentally different than men, but he didn't look down on women for that, because that simply wasn't normal. You wouldn't be a gentleman if you looked down on a woman for being physically and psychologically different from a man, you'd be an asshole. While their interpretations of these differences don't align with what modern medicine has determined, they weren't the same as in the later eras in American history. Women were, most certainly, oppressed because of these perceived differences, but it was a different system of oppression than what typically defines our idea of sexism.

It's hard to say if it affected Hamilton's relationship with his wife and daughters, as there isn't any real written proof, but I imagine Hamilton's attitude specifically towards women did make their relationship different than other fathers, daughters, husbands, and wives of the time. We do know that Hamilton was a very hands on father who dedicated a lot of time and care towards his children, and he did not treat his daughters any differently than his sons. He put the same amount of energy into their education, though they weren't educated in the same thing, and he seemed to be equally close with all his children.

Hamilton and women is a very interesting topic, and it gets more complicated when it comes to Rachel Faucette and Maria Reynolds and those parallels, but that is a topic for another time. Good thing its women's history month! Hope this helped :)

#alexander hamilton #history #amrev #american history #elizabeth hamilton #women's history #18th century #founding fathers #founding mothers #women's history month #asks

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typically-untypical · 4 months

Text

A Magician's Mask

AU: Circus

CW: Alcohol Usage

WC: 3,574

Date: 12/17/2023 (That's all for today until after I clean my kitchen for the Holidays!)

Patton felt safe in Roman's arms, gently pressed against the canvas fabric of the circus tent as the two of them exchanged soft kisses. This was fairly normal for them, praising each other on their acts and swapping sweet secrets hidden behind the main tent. Even Janus walking up on them was fairly normal. He had seen the two of them making out far more times than he could count, and he didn't mind one bit.

"Ring master," Roman drawled, pulling back only enough to allow Patton an escape.

"I guess I should expect a lion tamer to be ballsy, kissing out in the open like this." Janus took a step forward, giving Roman a kiss first then Patton before he stepped back again, leaning on his cane. "I have a job for you. Well, more for Patton then for you."

"Rude," Roman pouted, shifting to give Patton a bit more space. "And why is it I'm not included in this special job?"

"Because your social skills suck," Janus deadpanned before fondly rolling his eyes. "We have a new start." He tapped his gloved fingers against his cane, using it more for stabilization than he'd probably like to admit. "However, he's a bit shy. I figured Patton, out of the two of you, would make the best impression and be the least likely to leave him wanting to run away from us."

"Rude," Roman repeated and Janus stepped forward, leaning in closer to Roman. "I could give you a special assignment as well, but that requires you behave." There was a shiver in the air, a lingering quiet that was broken by Patton stepping in to save the day.

"I'd be happy to look after the new kiddo, how old is he? Oh! Did we finally get to adopt a youngen? You know I've always wanted a kid." He clapped his hands together and Janus moved back once again, smiling at his boyfriend's enthusiasm.

"No, he is about our age so I wouldn't consider him young. However, maybe we can kidnap you a kid in the next city we stop in."

"Now that wouldn't be very nice," Patton pouted and Janus just smirked again.

"I know."

"You're incorrigible," Roman waved his arm, pulling Janus in, though really Patton knew he was giving Janus plenty of opportunity to move on his own so he wouldn't mess up his knee. "Don't worry Patton, I'll keep our temptress from attempting to hurt any of the children who visit us."

"How sweet, and how do you intend to control me when you can't pull your thoughts away from kissing Patton."

"Not true," Roman whispered, "I can easily distract you by switching my attention." He leaned in to kiss Janus, stealing his lips and breath. The two slipped into their own twist of subduction and romance, so Patton decided to slip away, allowing them privacy to flirt and canoodle. He did have a job after all.

It wasn't often they got new people in their little family. Janus was very picky about who he let in but he always had a reason. Even if with Roman it had mostly been because 'the pretty boy is hot'. Patton giggled at the thought as he made his way to the center of their encampment. Janus set the wagons in a way that encouraged cooperation and collaboration. New people were almost always put at the center so it would be easy for them to reach out and ask for help if necessary. Once they were a bit more incorporated into the group, the wagons would get rearranged again. Sure that could be a bit difficult for people who didn't like the spot light, but who in the circus was afraid of a little attention? Knocking on the door to what served as their spill over wagon normally, Patton waited with bated breath, curious about who Janus had hired. He hadn't heard about anyone applying but sometimes these things were a bit sudden and the sudden ones were almost always the most interesting. They had a lot of the standard circus acts but Janus had a knack for finding things that wouldn't work in a typical circus and incorporating them here. He had also started doubling up on performers so they could run longer shows without burning people out. The circus was getting big and Patton loved every moment of it. "Hello, I'm Patton, part of our patented welcoming committee!"

The door opened to a tall man, probably only a few inches shorter than Roman, looking curiously at Patton. Where Roman was bulky and strong, this man was thin and whispy. He had an air of magic to him and Patton was excited to soak it all in. "Was that supposed to be a pun?"

"It was, I think I'm rather punny." Patton could see the way this new man fought back a smile attempting to remain serious and stoic.

"Interesting. My name is Logan, I believe Janus spoke of you. You are the trapeze artist, is that correct?"

"Yep, that's me, I had rather lofty goals in life don't you think."

Logan brought his hand to his mouth and coughed but Patton could see the hints of a smile just past his pointer finger. "I believe anyone who is willing to throw themselves through the air is a very adventurous and entertaining person." Logan cleared his throat, putting his hands behind his back. "Though I am curious as to what brings you to my door step. You said something about being the welcoming committee?"

"Yep!" Patton clapped his hands together. "It's my job to show you around, make sure you're familiar with the space and introduce you to everyone else in our circus. We keep getting bigger every year so if there are people you don't know it's okay." He gave Logan a reassuring smile and held out his hand. "Do you want to come with me?" For just a moment, Logan hesitated. His fingers reached out but then curled in. Was there a reason he was hesitant to reach out to an offered hand? Eventually, Logan nodded, but his hands behind his back, leaving Patton with far more questions than answers. Maybe he could sweet talk Janus into giving him more details later. For now though, he was playing host!

Patton took his time showing Logan around, trying to leave the other man plenty of space to talk about things. He didn't seem like the talkative type, at least not anymore. He would open his mouth to say something but then close his lips tight. It was disappointing, especially when bits of his personality would show through. Via, the daughter to one of their ushers, had almost tripped and Logan quickly caught her and helped her up. He gave her a soft smile before producing a handkerchief with the flick of his hand. He dusted off her cheeks before offering her the cloth. That wasn't the only trick Logan had up his sleeves, and it wasn't the only time he helped someone without a second though. Patton could see how the close up magic would work well to stir up a buzz in the crowd, but had Janus known about the compassion?

"Patton?" Someone was calling his name. Oops, he hadn't realized how lost in thought he was. Patton looked up, catching Logan's eyes. They were such a deep blue, far deeper than Patton remembered from early but then again he hadn't been this close. His cheeks dusted red as he lost his words. "Apologies for invading your space, but it seems like you wandered off there, metaphorically. Is everything alright?" Logan was so close, so incredibly close and Patton wasn't used to people being this close and towering over him. Most people treated him with kid gloves, the only two people who towered over him and didn't worry about the impression they might make was Janus and Roman.They towered over him with smirks and teasing quips, but there was concern and compassion in Logan's voice. Oh, shit. Would Janus be upset if he fell for the new guy on the first day?.

"Oh yeah, I'm good kiddo, perfectly okay. Just got a bit distracted." He took a step back, almost tripping on one of the tent stakes but Logan caught him, arm wrapped around the small of Patton's back, his other hand in Patton's. That was not helping his problem right now.

"Please be careful, the human body is surprisingly resilient when properly taken care of but it's best not to put yourself in situations where you may get injured."

Patton just nodded slowly, mouth hanging open slightly. "Well, Think that ends our tour." His mouth felt so dry and the lump in his throat had grown bigger.

"That may be best, you are looking a bit flushed. I hope you haven't gotten too hot out in this sun."

"No, no, I'm good," Patton muttered, giving the best smile he could. "Please let me know if you need anything, kay?"

Logan nodded slowly, gently taking a step back from Patton. "Of course, thank you for your kindness."

[Section Break]

Roman wasn't avoiding the newbie, honest, it was just that... well, Logan wasn't really his type. The man was quiet, stoic, and walked around as if he were a ghost. Sure there was probably a reason, no one moved that quietly without having a reason, but it still felt weird. The whole situation was made worse by the way Patton was enamored. He talked so much about the different things that Logan was doing, the magic, the pulling in of crowds, the pulling of his own weight with chores, it all made Roman feel a bit insecure. What was so good about this Logan character anyway? He had Patton's approval, and obviously he had Janus', but that wasn't enough.

They were going to be heading to the next city tomorrow morning, so this was their last night to celebrate, yet Logan was sitting just far enough that he wasn't part off the group. What did Patton see in someone so antisocial? Roman had a few drinks in his system, and just enough liquid courage to turn off his impulse control. He was finally going to tell Logan off. "How dare you steal my boyfriend's attention? So smug and so smart. I bet you think you're all that, don'tcha?" That wasn't what he meant, right? It was because Logan was so sullen, but he was smart. He had helped Patton with a few tricks to make them safer and he had actually discussed methods for helping Janus' leg hurt less during performances. Was it really his intelligence that irritated Roman, or just that Logan had taken Patton's attention?

If the look on Logan's face was any indication, he was surprised at Roman's observation. Did he not realized how enamored Patton was? How dare he be that stupid? "Apologies, I'm a bit lost, by your boyfriend, do you mean Patton?"

"Obviously, yeah there's also Jannie, but you couldn't have him if you tried." A look of something crossed Logan's face, something Roman couldn't read in his inebriated state. "Jannie's too smart to fall for a... for a... meanie."

What he could understand, were the words Logan spoke next. "I apologize that you see me as mean. However, I'm aware I can't have Janus, as I'm aware that Patton loves you. You won't lose him to me." There was a gravity behind his statement that soaked into Roman's core, a memory of his brother looking listfully out to the ocean which was always just out of reach for the two of them. Logan had turned to look at Janus and Patton, curled up together as Patton tried to feed Janus a marshmallow he was pretending he didn't like. Still, Janus occasionally took bites from it when Patton pretended he wasn't looking. Roman followed Logan's gaze, watching the scene and feeling the warmth fill him. He smiled at the two of them. He almost forgot he was standing next to Logan.

"You should rest," Logan's voice was smooth and despite not being as deep. Roman wasn't jealous when Janus and Patton were cute or when they talked about each other, so what made Logan different? And what was with Logan's tone. It was heavy. It tasted wrong. "Let me take you back over to the two of them."

"And you won't steal my boyfriend?"

"I won't steal your boyfriend," Logan agreed, putting his hand on Roman's back slowly leading him toward the fire.

"What about stealing me?"

There was a pause, a stutter in Logan's even steps before he continued. "I had the notion that you didn't particularly like me?"

Roman shrugged. "Who knows, you're softer than I thought. I'm never wrong, but maybe I could know you more. I'll debate you when the world is less woooh. If you win you can kiss me."

"We can discuss the details when you're sober." That felt like a rejection and Roman pouted, right up until he focused on Janus and Patton again. Throwing his arms open he stumbled toward the two of them.

"My loves!"

[Section Break]

As Logan watched Roman sit down next to Janus, leaning into him and spinning an epic tale about defending Patton's honor, Logan slipped away, fingers playing at the shirt buttons on his wrist. He had expected Roman not to like him. He was everything Logan could be, loud, vibrant, creative, he just hadn't expected Roman to think he was trying to take away Janus and Patton. Sure, he was closer to the two of them than anyone else but that was because they were they two who had reached out, and Logan was a bit too nervous to talk to the others.

When he had first asked Janus if he could join them, Janus had asked Logan why he wanted to join the circus and his answer had been the only obvious one. Logan wanted to find a place where he belonged. He wasn't convinced this was the right place. It had been nice thus far but he couldn't get into the groove of it. Everyone here was so full of life, and Logan was.... he couldn't break out of his own silence.

It was hard for him to relax and let go of all of his fears of failure. Watching Roman, Patton, and Janus, not to mention the others, Logan wondered if he'd be able to go back to the way he was when he was younger, seeing the world through the eyes of childlike wonder, asking questions that never had answers, existing without reservation. He grabbed a coin from his nightstand, sitting on his bed as he flipped the metal disk along his fingers. There were times when he almost let it slip, almost allowed himself to speak freely. There were times when it felt like the chains of his past were going to let him go. However, as soon as his lips would curl to speak he would hear the voices in his head, the cruel jabs at him being annoying, over bearing, and unwanted. It was hard to fit in when he was playing a part, but he couldn't give up his mask. He couldn't risk people hating him for who truly he was. If they hated a watered down version of him, that was alright. He hated himself too.

With a sigh, Logan set the coin back down and lied back in his bed, looking up at the ceiling. Janus had hired him to do close up magic, and Logan was good at that, but he had said something that still rung in Logan's ears. "We all have masks, the question is are you happy with the one you're wearing." Was he?

A knock at his door pulled him out of his thoughts and Logan pushed himself up, dusting down his rumpled clothes. He walked over to the door, opening it up, words dying on his lips as he saw Janus and his all too knowing smirk.

"May I come in?" Why was Janus here? Shouldn't he be curled up with Roman and Patton at this point? The night was beautiful, if Logan had a lover he would want to be in their arms under this sky.

"Of course." Logan took a step back, giving Janus the space to enter. "I'm sure you are aware there isn't much room for you to sit but feel free to take a seat on the bed."

"Thank you, Logan, always so considerate." Janus walked over to the bed before slowly sitting down, rubbing his leg at the knee. "I wanted to apologize for Roman, I'm aware of how... protective he can be but please know it comes from a place of care and not a place of hostility."

That was obvious. The care Roman had for both Patton and Janus shone through all of his actions, the way he held his breath every time Patton did a stunt, the way he led Janus to a chair after each performance. Logan had been watching all of them carefully, silently observing the life they had built together. He had been jealous. No matter how loud Roman was, no matter how much Patton didn't understand, no matter how secretive Janus could be, they all still loved each other. The three of them accepted each other just as they were. "I took nothing he said to heart. Alcohol has a way of getting to all of us and I know his affections for Patton run high." Patton had been one of the best parts of being here at the circus, and also the worst. He thought he was a comedian with all of his puns, and while Logan had, at one time, loved a good play on words, he found himself groaning internally at Patton. For so long he had been told that was a low brow form of comedy, but it was cute, wasn't it? It was a fight between who he wanted to be and who he had been told he had to be.

"Yes, his affections for Patton do run high, and he can be a bit possessive despite us having an open relationship. More than once I've had a talk with him about scaring off people I want to pursue. Should I tell him to back off from you as well?"

There was a purr in Janus' voice that Logan didn't understand and he furrowed his brow. "I don't believe there is a need for that. If my understanding is correct, Patton is simply being friendly. He acts similar around me as he does around others in the troupe."

Janus chuckled, shaking his head. "I'm fairly sure your understanding is wrong, but I also wasn't asking about your connection with Patton."

Logan furrowed his brow as he looked down at Janus. "You are Roman's only other partner, correct? I..." It was like being struck with sudden understanding. "Do you have an interest in me?" That was news to him. He assumed he had just been a form of amusement for Janus.

"It's interesting. You are extremely perceptive, you approach people who will be interested in the tricks you have to show. You gage moods, attitudes, all in a blink, and yet you haven't noticed what is right in front of you." Janus stood up, leaning on his cane as he took a step forward. "I am interested in you. I'm interested in the smile you try to hide when Patton makes a joke, I'm interested in the way you strategize, I'm interested in who you are when you let your walls down." Logan stepped back as Janus approached, back hitting the wall as his breath caught in his throat. "Just to make things extremely clear. I want to pursue you. Will you let me?"

Logan hesitated. He didn't know how to respond. What if this was all some cruel joke to show him how much of an outsider he really was? Logan caught that anxious thought and tried to pull it away from his heart. Janus wasn't like that. Janus wasn't like the people he knew in his past, but he hadn't thought the others were like that either. He would have to sleep on it. "May I... May I have time to think?"

Taking a step back, finally giving Logan room to breathe, Janus nodded. "Of course, but don't think I am the only one on pursuit," He smiled. "Oh, something I might add. Roman is insufferably jealous, but it's not usually about people his partners are pursuing but rather about people he wants to be pursued by. Just a hint."

"Masks are useful," Janus whispered, "But if you never take it off, you'll forget who you are." He nodded his head to the door and Logan slid away, giving Janus the space to exit. "It can be hard to take a mask off, but it's worth it when you find the right people. I know from experience." It was a strange bit of wisdom to leave Logan with, but he did leave, closing the door behind him leaving Logan standing there as a blushing mess.

He wanted to be seen. He desperately wanted to be seen.

But was he ready for it?

Looking back at the coin on his nightstand, Logan went to turn out his light.

There was only one way to tell.

@tsspromptmonth @simplestoryteller @fantasticfangirl21 @joylessnightsky @glacierruler

#TSS Rare Gifts Event 2023 #Untypical Creations #Sanders Sides #Sanders Side fic #Fanfic #Patton Sanders #Virgil Sanders #Janus Sanders #Logan Sanders #Mild Logan Angst #Circus AU

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thejackofalltrades42069 · 5 months

Text

Avoiding having a random life.

I’m back. I promise I’ll write a shorter post someday, in my mind this post was like 4 times shorter.

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Intro.

I had been thinking for some time about how contradictory we are, a lot of times we think something, or have some sort of “philosophy”, but when it comes to actually doing things, we often do things that are completely opposite to what we preach or completely different from what we believe are our values or our philosophies.

To a certain degree this is completely normal and we could even say it’s intrinsic to human beings, BUT, this could be pretty bad if it’s done too much because, if for example I’m thinking in a certain way and then acting the opposite way all the time, maybe I’m acting unconsciously too much, and that’s not good (because I’m messing up my own plans all the time).

Maybe I have an objective like saving money, I suggest other people to save money, and I say I’m saving money, but I end up going out every weekend and spending it all in fancy dinners, alcohol, and ordering things online.

As Rachel said in Batman Begins, “But it’s not who you are underneath, it’s what you do that defines you”, this is completely true, you can think of things you believe and things you value, but if you don’t act accordingly, then, you’re just behaving randomly.

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Ideas to fight this.

Perhaps a lot of times it’s not enough to just be aware of things, to read things, to talk to a therapist or other people, because even if we are skilled or know certain information, as humans, we have certain tendencies, and we’re biased by our environment way too much, so we end up doing what people around us (and in social media) are doing.

As Rah’s al Ghul said in Batman Begins, “The training is nothing, will is everything, the will to act.” If we don’t take action with our lives, we’re not doing much, we’re just existing (that’s not necessarily a bad thing for everyone), even if we’re knowledgeable or if we’re trained, it’s easy to remain in “inaction”.

It’s completely necessary to take practical measures to change our biases in a positive way so we can improve ourselves and stop behaving randomly as our emotions dictate in that moment, if we always act as our emotions dictate at the time being, we take many bad decisions very often (like buying a bunch of stuff online that we don’t need, like behaving in a shitty way to a friend).

Perhaps a good place to start with is learning information, but that information needs to be taken to practice, and it needs to be followed up, by reading more, and by applying it to our lives and sticking to doing it at least for a month so a habit can be created. After that, we need to always give some sort of follow up, by consuming useful information, and by forcing us to make some practical changes.

Example: we can do a schedule for activities, and really do them, say you want to exercise because you sit on your butt all day, find the best time in the day, force yourself to exercise even if it’s just 30 minutes. Use sticky notes or whatever, wake up earlier, or force yourself to do it right after work or school

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Don’t do random stuff all your life.

These ideas lead to my next topic I’ve been thinking a lot recently; most people just do random actions all their lives until they die (not that there’s something wrong about it, but I can’t live like that myself).

To clarify and give examples:

When people don’t have a clear objective about what they want in life, they end up doing a bunch of senseless and random things like having a completely awful job for years and keep working there because they think they’re making a lot of money and they think they need to have a certain lifestyle, but, that could lead to a totally stressful and meaningless life.

Another example is how many people don’t have a clear idea of how a love relationship should function in the long term, some don’t even know what to expect from a relationship. Others have wild unrealistic ideas of how relationships should be, so most people end up breaking up all the time because they have a very poor management or unrealistic expectations of the relationship. This info needs to be learned, not just through experience, but also, through books, podcasts, through other people like therapists, friends, and so on.

A lot of other examples come to mind, like how so many people just spend all weekends getting drunk and being hangover, or how they spend the little money they have in fancy meals and in fancy clothes. We tend to do what others around us do, but, is that really what you want to be doing? Do you really enjoy that? Is there any meaning or future in doing that? Asking many questions like these can help find an answer, the answer will be different for everyone.

Anyhow, the way I think we can counter this random lifestyle is, knowing what we want (something realistic), and with baby steps, walking toward that goal.

If you don’t really know what you want out of life, you can start with small goals, achieving one, then the next, for example, you want to continue learning Spanish but you don’t have a lot of time, well, set a schedule and get an easy app for language learning like Busuu or Duolingo, find the best time to do it 15 minutes, and really do it, and, don’t worry if you skip a day or two, but be consistent, avoid other social media so you have the energy, take the time to do it even more in your holidays.

To provide a real example for a larger goal:

When I was 18 I was taking a French class, a guy asked another guy how come he was taking a full time French class and not working, he replied that he saved money, he said that since he was a lot younger, when his parents gave him money, he would put away some of that money, when he worked he always put away money, by the time he was taking the class he could quit for some months because he had a bunch of money saved (not the case for everyone I know, but a lot of people who can save money just spend it however they can). After I heard that guy I thought that was real smart, when I started working I would always save money, just in case I wanted to quit or in case I wanted to buy whatever or travel, over the years I accumulated a bunch of money and I thought, “huh, I could buy a house eventually”, I kept saving money for about other 5 years with that house in mind, and after about a total of 10 years guess what, I just bought a house with my girlfriend a couple months ago, thanks to my savings it’s a nice location, a nice hose, and a small mortgage (now I’m very poor, though).

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Conclusion.

My goal changed through the years, but the fact remains that I achieved a great thing because I kept saving money, it would be the same case with other goals, we just need to take small steps toward those goals, learn useful information that can guide us, do some trial and error, and so on. Even if our main goal in life changes, it’s a lot easier when we have a solid foundation of knowledge and practical skills, it’s always good to keep learning a few things here and there and taking action (beware of being too passive, but do things progressively, don’t go insane).

And, as a personal note, don’t overwork yourself and don’t try to have huge and unlikely goals, many people end up very badly when they want to achieve something that’s too great (perhaps I’ll write about this next).

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bettsfic · 2 years

Note

hi, i'd appreciate a little advice on this. as someone who is currently seeking a career in creative writing similar to yours, do you have any advice for those just starting out? i don't have much connections to my local industry and i don't really have a mentor that would help me with this.

if it helps, i am an undergrad (but soon to be fresh grad).

congrats on your soon to be graduation!

your best bet is going to be applying for cw MFA programs, which would offer both connections and mentorship. you're going to want to look for fully funded programs, which is to say, programs that cover your tuition and offer a monthly stipend in exchange for teaching composition or cw. don't apply anywhere you have to pay for. it's never worth it to go into debt, and moreover, paid programs are a nightmare mix of gross wealth and competition for what little funding there is.

but! if you're still in your early 20s, there's no harm at all in holding off on the MFA to work somewhere full-time for a while. i thought my 5-year gap between my undergrad degree and my grad degree made me a poor candidate for grad school but really that's what most people do. undergrad puts you through the ringer and there's no shame in recovering from academic burnout for a while. one good thing about a career in writing is that there's genuinely no hurry. the more life experience you can pick up, the more inspiration there is to draw from. so have fun, don't rush, live your life as close to the way you want to live it as possible.

the first and maybe hardest thing to accept about a career in writing is that you'll always have to split your attention. almost no one is a full-time creative writer. but the good news is that there are lots of jobs related to writing. you could go into publishing and be an editor or agent. once you get your MFA you can teach college courses or work in a writing center. or you can go into commercial copywriting or copyediting (that's where the big money is). it's hard to make enough money to live on just your creative work, but there's a ton of money in adjacent fields.

as far as pursuing publication, i would focus on short form. read short stories, write short stories, publish short stories. (or if you write nonfiction, focus on essays.) short form allows you to practice the complete drafting, revising, submitting, and publishing process in a safer and more contained space than novel publishing. once you go through the entire process over and over again, you gain the extremely valuable, extremely rare skill of knowing when something is finished. it's absolutely necessary to reach that feeling, that little click when you know something you've written is the best version of the thing it is and more edits will only turn it into something different, not better. getting to that point lends you confidence and security in your own work.

more specifically, i recommend writing one short story, max 4k words, the best work you're capable of. now you have a writing sample for applications and awards, and something to publish. getting a good sample ready will start opening doors for you.

while you're doing research on figuring out what lit mags to send to, keep an eye out for publications looking for slush readers. there is no experience more valuable than putting yourself on the other side of the submission window. you get a very rapid understanding of what editing really is, what kinds of stories are out there, and where your own work stands. you'll also gain some connections that way, and maybe some editorial mentorship. these positions aren't paid, but they also aren't a huge time commitment, and it's worth its weight in gold in helping you accept rejection. the rejections you receive hit different when you know how it feels to vote thumbs down on someone else's work.

if your goal is to eventually get an agent and then a book deal with a big publisher, know that the road there is a long one, and that's a good thing. i feel horrible for writers who debut at 25 to major acclaim. it may seem like a dream come true, but it's a curse. first of all, now that i'm in my 30s, i'm glad it's taken me this long to get where i am, because i'm confident enough in my work and i know what i'm doing well enough to push back on things like bad edits. i can, and have, turned down people interested in my work who didn't actually vibe with it. you want to hold out for the people who love your work for the same reasons you love it. it takes a long time to cultivate that kind of security, the belief that you and you alone know what's best for the story you're trying to tell. too many voices too early on can ruin something beautiful.

also, in literary fiction, the debut novel is a big deal. it might be in other genres too but specifically in literary fiction, a book deal isn't just a book deal. it's your introduction into the community. once you have a book out, you'll start getting ARCs for blurbs, requests for interviews, signings, juror requests, maybe even commission work from big magazines. so it's not just "oh i finished a novel time to publish it i guess." a debut is "this is the absolute best work i'm capable of, i know and have faith in what it's doing, i know my own unique style and aesthetics, i know where it belongs, and i'm ready to share it with others."

that might be hard to take in and i know i didn't listen at all when my mentors told me not to rush publishing. i put a lot of undue pressure on myself when i should have been focusing on craft, and i also queried agents when my first manuscript was only half-baked. i can't tell you how badly i regret that. i went out with my second manuscript instead, which was a bigger risk but i was far more confident in it, and which signed me an agent and got me on the desks of dozens of editors. one editor put a bid in but her publisher said no. so i ran a marathon only to get to the finish line and have to turn back. i started writing it in 2016; the last round of submissions was late 2021. five years, and it's still not published. and it may never be. but there will be other manuscripts, other editors, and other opportunities. and as time passes i only gain a sharper understanding of what i'm trying to get on the page.

meanwhile, there's plenty to do before big publication. put your work out there. apply for workshops, residencies, grants, awards. start building up your CV. keep writing and generating new work to build up your portfolio. keep an eye out for opportunities that come your way. just yesterday a residency reached out to me to ask me to be a juror on their application board and in exchange they're giving me a month-long stay at their place (i can't tell you how much i love residencies. pain in the ass to apply for but a godsend once you get in). you just never know what's going to open doors for you; a publication in a small magazine might net you award nominations, maybe even award wins. the more you put yourself out there, the more rejections you'll receive, yeah, but the acceptances can be huge. unfortunately that means it's hard to plan your future, but it also helps you develop faith in yourself knowing good things will come your way at some point, as long as you keep writing and sharing your work.

#writing advice #the writing life

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fishcemetery · 7 months

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♫ Missis Sara, sail me seas ♫

The rules are simple! Tag people and name a character you want to know more about! If you want to let the person you tagged decide who to showcase, then don’t name a character and they can pick somebody. Easy! The person who is tagged will then bold the remarks below that apply to their character &, if they want to, include a picture with their reply!

(i'm going to amend the rules and italicize the tags as well, because i can never for the love of god tell which words have been bolded on mobile, unless i squint really hard.)

Tagged by @bunnybananasims! Although Camille is a formidable herald of damnation and game errors, Sara is still THE queen and icon, so the choice was kinda obvious. I admit, it's my fault so few people even know about her, but I'm going to fix it soon. I promise. There are A LOT of screenshots.

A couple things to note: first, with the way my storytelling goes, Saramesses Coppuroplise is basically a Sims version of an original character of mine, and for the most part her personality and backstory stem from there.

That's kinda necessary, because second, she's been randomly acquired in the course of gameplay and has no actual in-game backstory... except that when my starter sim and I found her, she had been meticulously hacked into several pieces and scattered all over the planet, and we had to put her back together with love, care, black magic and some industrial-grade glue.

In other words, she's my mummy. Or at least used to be.

$ Financial: wealthy / moderate / poor / in poverty

✚ Medical: fit / moderate / sickly / disabled / disadvantaged / non applicable

✪ Class or Caste: upper / middle / working / unsure / other

✔ Education: qualified / unqualified / studying / other - on the job (haven't bothered with installing University yet, but as the town's resident Mad Scientist, she's at least qualified enough to blow up the lab every week and still keep the job)

✖ Criminal Record: yes, for major crimes (?) / yes, for minor crimes / no / has committed crimes, but not caught yet / yes, but charges were dismissed (they wouldn't have massacred my 3000-year-old girl like that for nothing, so someone must've done something)

◒ Children: has a child or children / has no children and doesn’t want any children / wants children

◑ Relationship with Family: close with sibling(s) / not close with sibling(s) / has no siblings / sibling(s) is deceased

◔ Affiliation: orphaned / adopted / disowned / raised by birth parent / not applicable

♦ extroverted / introverted / in between

♦ disorganized / organized / in between

♦ close minded / open-minded / in between

♦ calm / anxious / in between

♦ disagreeable / agreeable / in between

♦ cautious / reckless / in between

♦ patient / impatient / in between

♦ outspoken / reserved / in between

♦ leader / follower / in between

♦ empathetic / vicious bastard / in between

♦ optimistic / pessimistic / in between

♦ traditional / modern / in between

♦ hard-working / lazy / in between

♦ cultured / uncultured /in between/ unknown

♦ loyal / disloyal / unknown

♦ faithful / unfaithful / unknown

★ Faith: monotheist / polytheist / atheist / agnostic

☆ Belief in Ghosts or Spirits: yes / no / don’t know / don’t care

✮ Belief in an Afterlife: yes / no / don’t know / don’t care

✯ Belief in Reincarnation: yes / no / don’t know / don’t care

❃ Belief in Aliens: yes / no / don’t know / don’t care

✧ Religious: orthodox / liberal / in between / not religious

❀ Philosophical: yes / no

❤ Sexuality: heterosexual / homosexual / bisexual / asexual / pansexual

❥ Sex: sex repulsed / sex neutral / sex favorable / naive and clueless

♥ Romance: romance repulsed / romance neutral / romance favorable / naive and clueless / romance suspicious

❣ Sexually: adventurous / experienced / naive / inexperienced / curious

⚧ Potential Sexual Partners: male / female / agender / other / none / all

⚧ Potential Romantic Partners: male / female/ agender / other / none / all

☠ Combat Skills: excellent / good / moderate / poor / none

≡ Literacy Skills: excellent / good / moderate / poor / none

✍ Artistic Skills: excellent / good / moderate / poor/ none

✂ Technical Skills: excellent / good / moderate / poor / none

☕︎ Drinking Alcohol: never / special occasions / sometimes / frequently / alcoholic

☁ Smoking: tried it / trying to quit / quit / never / rarely / sometimes / frequently / chain-smoker

✿ Recreational Drugs: never / special occasions / sometimes / frequently / addict

✌ Medicinal Drugs: never / no longer needs medication / some medication needed / frequently / to excess

☻ Unhealthy Food: never / special occasions / sometimes / frequently / binge eater

$ Splurge Spending: never / sometimes / frequently / shopaholic

♣ Gambling: never / rarely / sometimes / frequently / compulsive gambler

｡˚ ✧ I tag... random followers who don't seem to have done it yet. Here. Pick anyone, and have at it. Have an extra burden on your shoulders. Or don't – who am I to tell you?

@simsanctuary, @tsims, @ares-in-a-jar, @blossom-sims, @nikkeisimmer

And if you really really wanna do it, but no one's tagged you yet – just tell everyone I did, and go forth, champion! I'm rooting for you and your pixel people.

#ts3 #the sims 3 #the sims #simblr #ts3 simblr

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allthebrazilianpolitics · 2 years

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Brazil’s Exodus of People Is A Bad Omen

A growing number of Brazilians are losing hope in the country and emigrating, including high-skilled workers.

At a recent dinner party in São Paulo, a friend who is an executive at a technology company mentioned that he and his wife are planning to move to Lisbon. “The public schools in Portugal are great, it’s totally safe, and I can get almost all my work done remotely,” he said. He added that he expected to fly to São Paulo every month or two, whenever an in-person meeting would be necessary. Several other guests said they, too, were considering taking their families to Lisbon or Miami after having spent several months during the pandemic working from abroad. Indeed, the possibility of working remotely has spurred a debate about leaving Brazil among a growing number of Brazilian executives and entrepreneurs.

Such cases make up only a fraction of the increasing number of Brazilians who go abroad in search of opportunities. The bulk of those leaving the country are less privileged, though emigration is out of reach for the poorest. In 2021, a staggering 17% of Brazilians who traveled abroad did not return, a record high. The number of Brazilians legally residing in Portugal, for example, recently reached a new record of 252,000—a whopping 23% increase compared to last year. The actual number of Brazilians in Portugal is likely half a million, including those who live there illegally and the thousands of Brazilians who also hold European passports and thus do not register as Brazilians.

Moreover, the number of Brazilians applying for Portuguese citizenship also saw a significant increase over the past decade, from 24,000 in 2010 to 58,000 in 2020. Likewise, the number of Brazilians living in countries like Italy, Ireland and the U.S. has increased sharply over the past years—1.8 million Brazilians now live in the U.S., a 20% increase from 2016. The number of Brazilians detained at the US border is also reaching new records at nearly 150 per day.

Managers and entrepreneurs consider leaving not just for economic reasons—after all, many prefer to keep their high-end jobs in São Paulo or Rio, which pay much more than comparable opportunities in places like Lisbon. Often, they seek to offer their children “normal upbringings” with better safety and public education outside of the elite bubble. This reveals deep-seated doubts about whether Brazil can overcome its most urgent challenges, such as profound inequality and a lack of public safety, over the years to come.

#brazil #brazilian politics #politics #migration #mod nise da silveira #image description in alt #man i have a friend in europe rn and they said to me 'it's amazing! if you want things you just get to do/get them!' 😭

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taleofbread · 1 year

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Adventure on Wave Mountain

(a short story I wrote 6 years ago in a sleep-deprived caffeine-induced manic state and have finally summoned up the courage to share with the world)

One day, A fell in love with B. But B was more interested in C. Unfortunately, C had been captured by E, an evil magician, and was being held in the deepest dungeon of E’s castle, located at the top of Wave Mountain. They were being subjected daily to horrible magical experiments.

B proposed to A that the two of them go on a journey in order to rescue C. A agreed, adding that they could contact their friend, D, who had a large amount of knowledge about the terrain around Wave Mountain and could serve as a guide. D was a small spider who lived in a nearby village.

D agreed to help them. But what the two didn’t know is that D was secretly in love with A!

The three travelers made the long journey to the mountain. They faced many dangers, and were beginning to run low on supplies, but finally, just before morning, they made it to E’s dark castle at the mountain’s peak.

The companions opened the front door of the castle to find an entrance room with two other doors, one leading to the right and one to the left. D, who was skilled at detecting magic, examined both doors. “There’s a spell on each door allowing only one person to enter, so it looks like you two will have to split up. I don’t think it applies to nonhumans, though.” B decided that they would be fine alone, and so D went with A though the door on the left, while B went right.

B found themself in a smallish reception room containing some chairs and a desk. A lamp on the desk cast a cozy warm glow about the room. At the desk sat a guard named G.

G introduced themself and explained to B that this was the entrance to E’s dungeon—but to get in, B would have to beat G in a staring contest. B, though not physically strong, had a large amount of mental control over their own body, and so they agreed to the contest eagerly.

B sat down across from G and the two began to stare at each other. They stared for five minutes, ten minutes. To pass the time they started chatting. G told B about their childhood working in their parents’ bakery, before finding at age fourteen that they identified strongly with E’s evil cause and running away from home to join E and get a job as a guard. G had had many challengers, they told B, but they had never lost a staring contest.

As the two talked, however, something unusual happened. After so long staring at B’s face, and hearing about their life, G found themself feeling something they’d never felt before. B was so…beautiful. It seemed a shame to G to simply turn B away, as G had done to so many other challengers. G ached to keep talking to and looking at B. They were falling head over heels in love. But then G scolded themself, remembered why they were there. Protecting the castle was the most important thing. “My sincere apologies,” G said, pressing a button on the desk as they spoke, “but this is how the boss wants me to play.”

B saw a flash of light, an explosion, and then something red. And pain. They clenched their teeth together, determined to keep eye contact with G, but tried to use their peripheral vision to see what had happened on the desk. Their right hand had been blown clean off. Shards of wood that had been torn out of the desk were now embedded in their left hand and arms. A bomb. They felt sick, but kept their eyes on G, even more determined to win despite the unfairness of it all. E’s rules are not fair, B knew, but E sticks to them no matter what. So G will do the same. Even if my hand needs to be blown off, I’ll be allowed entry if I win.

G swallowed. Even the best starers had given up after the bomb was pulled on them, and usually it wasn’t even necessary. B must believe very strongly in their mission. And their hands, G thought…what have I done to the hands of such a kind, pretty, determined person! First one tear, then another came to G’s eyes, then many more. It was the first time they had ever cried in their life. G hid their head in their hands in shame, trying to cover the tears. G realized too late that they had broken eye contact.

G glanced at B, then looked down into their lap again. “Rules are rules,” they said, opening a drawer in their desk. “Who are you here to save?” “C,” said B. G selected a key from their drawer and handed it over. “Good luck,” they said. “You’re the first one to ever beat me and you deserve it. The dungeon is through this door back here.” B walked to the door they indicated, opened it. “But be warned that your troubles aren’t over yet,” G called as B went in.

Meanwhile, A and D were walking upwards, seemingly endlessly—a flight of stairs, then a hallway, then another flight. They finally found a locked door blocking their path. At first the two thought they were stuck, but then D, because of their small size, volunteered to go inside the lock and turn the bolts with their legs and A agreed. A watched D disappear into the lock, heard one click, then another, then 6 more. Then a voice: “There’s one bolt that I can’t reach, but with your strength you should be able to force the door open.” A wrapped their hand around the knob, then hesitated. “You’ll be ok?” “Hopefully,” came the reply. “Either way, we don’t have any other options.” “Alright then,” A said. “Get ready…” They twisted the knob, harder and harder, until with a sound of snapping metal it turned and the door swung open.

As the door opened A found themself face-to-face with E, who had been making some sort of dastardly magical concoction before they were interrupted. A froze on the spot in their fear of E’s power. Then, D fell out of the keyhole to the floor, and suddenly all of E’s attention was directed to the small spider—5 of D’s legs broken, desperately but unsuccessfully trying to stand.

E fell in love instantly. Who was this attractive spider, they wondered, who had somehow managed to get into their secret laboratory against all odds? I want this spider to be in my life forever, they thought. E strode past the cowering A and began to bend down to look at D. They’re hurt, E realized. Then A, in desperation, threw themself between the magician and the spider, crying, “stay back!”

“Get out of the way,” commanded E. “I need to heal that spider.” Heal?, thought A with confusion, but they said, “Not until you tell me where the dungeon is. I’m here to rescue a friend.” “Mhmm,” replied E in a sassy manner, “and since when was such a small human strong enough to order around such a powerful evil magician as I?” But then E realized that A’s left heel was poised above D. “Tell me or I’ll crush them,” A said grimly. Ignoring a startled squeak from D, they continued: “You want to have a chance of healing this spider, you’d better tell me where to go. I need to rescue somebody who’s important to a friend of mine.” “What a wet blanket,” sighed E. “It’s right down these stairs.” They pointed to another doorway in the back of the lab. A headed for the door, pausing to look back at the magician and D. “You’re really going to heal them? Aren’t you evil?” A asked. E replied: “You do you, and I’ll do me.” Apparently satisfied, A turned and continued towards the dungeon.

After descending a different, seemingly endless array of staircases, A went through a door and found themselves face-to-face with B. B sprawled on the ground, in despair, splattered with blood. Which seemed to be theirs. And missing a hand. “Fuck,” said A. “Shit.”

They wrapped their arms around B, tears falling from their eyes. “What happened?” But B could not answer. “We need to save C,” was all they said. “I have a key to their cell. It’s just over there.” A looked to where B was pointing, noticed what they hadn’t before. To their left there was no floor. Only a seething pit of what A immediately recognized as Hydrofluoric Acid. Across the pit, A could see another hallway, probably leading to C’s cell. And to get across—a row of bars, arranged like monkey bars, along the ceiling.

B stood up, hugged A. “We’re almost there,” they said. “I can’t use my hands, but you can go across, get C—it should be easy with your strength. Take the key,” they said, holding it out. “No,” A said, practically sobbing “I can’t—I just threatened to kill D, B. I was ready to kill one of my friends to save another. I can’t save C. I don’t deserve to.” “Yes, you can save C,” B replied. “I’ve done much worse than you did. People do what they have to in order to save loved ones. It’s ok. You can keep going.” A blinked, rubbed their eyes. Let go of B’s bleeding hand. “You’re right,” A said. “keep going…” They walked towards the pit. Grabbed the first bar. “Then you need to come with me,” they said, turning. “Because I’m pretty sure that door locked behind me. Hold on to my legs.”

“I guess you’re right,” said B, after checking the doors they both came in through. “Sure you can carry me?” “Of course,” said A. “What else is there to do?” So B grabbed onto A’s legs with their arms, and A swung onto the first bar, biceps straining to hold both of their weights. A was the strongest person B knew, and sure enough, they swung to the second bar, and the third, B holding on.

Suddenly, B heard a flapping sound. Some sort of cloud was approaching the two of them. As it got closer, B began to make out a flock of birds flying towards them. “Cave Pigeons!” they yelled to A, but before they had even finished the flock was upon them and all was a blur of feathers. B felt talons digging into their neck, their arms. They looked up to see that A was being attacked even more heavily. A had let go with one hand in an attempt to wave the pigeons away from their other hand, but every time they stopped the pigeons would come back and start clawing at the hand that was still holding on. Finally, A realized that all they could do was keep going. They began to reach out their right hand, now covered in cuts, to grasp the next bar, while the pigeons fluttered and clawed all around them. B watched as A tried once, twice, and on the third try finally managed to wrap their hand around the iron. A wasn’t going to make it, B realized. With all the blood on their fingers they wouldn’t be able to grip the bars and carry both of their weights. There was only one way, B thought, to avoid the two of them falling to their deaths.

“I’m so glad I was able to be friends with you!” B said to A. And they let go of A’s feet. “B!” A screamed. “No!” But all they could do was watch as B fell away from them forever.

C, leading A, took the steps up out of a secret dungeon exit into the pinkish light of morning on Wave Mountain. At the same time, E was emerging from the front door to watch the sunrise. D, legs healed, rode on their shoulder. C started in fear to see E, while A just looked at magician and spider dully. “Don’t worry,” said E, letting D down from their shoulder. “You three can be on your way whenever you’d like. I just really wanted to look at the sun rising over the mountains this morning.” A blinked, then turned to look at the rising sun. But what A saw was a funeral pyre, set adrift out into the infinite black oceans of space. Mourning B’s death. Only, the sun has always been a funeral pyre, A realized with a start. It’s a funeral pyre for everyone that has ever died, anywhere on the earth. A stood there, letting it wash them clean in its blinding pink light.

#short story #original story #adventure on wave mountain #A #B #C #D #E #G #wave mountain #i write stuff

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punmster · 2 years

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The first of many (hopefully) advices from an idiot...writing characters that drive a plot

I'm too fucking tired because tumblr deleted my first draft so here's a bullshit shorter version of what I was gonna post before it got yeeted into oblivion.

So here's my shitty understanding of how to make sure your characters aren't cardboard being thrown around by the plot and to develop that middle bit of the story nobody seems to know how to do

First of all, understand that likes, dislikes, gender, sexuality, etc. don't really matter unless they are the focus of the plot. In fact, they are typically results of the plot (eg. a character likes choccy milk, so rejects the strawberry milk that is poisoned...using red wine vs vodka or goat cheese vs rat cheese will work just as well)

With that in mind, here are the 9 things I believe to be necessary to write a character that influences the plot (personality affects plot, my friends), and therefore to understand how your plot may flow realistically and without OOC

Note that you can interpret these categories as you like and can ignore the starter questions I added, and I recommend writing whatever you think is relevant while always keeping in mind the extent to which these things apply (hence why I didn't just put a list of character traits or a list of character dev questions, which I think are either too vague, too specific/narrow, or too absolute for making realistic characters)

Here's a character sheet you are free to use, print, open in MS paint, put in a google slide like I did (with credit):

Rank: Authority.

I have 3 P's, one of which is position. This means things like status (a wanted felon can't do as much as a knight captain or prince), relationships (the prince might not be able to go against their fiancee from the duchy), and literal physical position (can't help a problem in Russia if you're in Africa)

Class: General purpose of the character

Listen, why have a character if they don't even do shit for the story? Even if not explicitly said so in your story, a character may be a mentor for another, a friend, a voice of reason, etc.

Preferably don't have two characters with the same role

Charisma: Everything to do with socialization (ew)

Important b/c if your character isn't literally the only conscious being in existence as I suspect they might be, they will need to interact with others

Notably, other characters will have to react to them (which we will discuss another time)

How do they interact with others? How extroverted or introverted? Are they talkative with certain people? How shy?

How kind? How involved do they get? How much are they willing to step on others for their goals? How considerate are they of others?

How convincing are they? How well liked are they?

Are they competitive? Do they have a general dislike of people? Are they bad at interacting with certain demographics like children?

Are there types of relationships they struggle with? Are there some they don't want at all?

Speed: Patience and complacency

How quickly a character acts can influence your story's pacing. When they act is generally important to figuring out the timeline of your story.

How quickly do they respond (regardless of how well they do)? How patient are they? How complacent are they?

Do they follow the rules? Do they only act on the orders of others?

Do they rush in recklessly or do they make a plan? Would they do one in some cases (eg. only reckless if it comes to their loved ones)

How much are they willing to stand in terms of punishment, pain, insults, etc.?

Intelligence: Skillset and methods

Another of the 3 P's: power. Even if a character is in the position to, do they have the ability to do something?

What a character is able to do will obviously affect what actions they can take regarding conflicts in the plot. Note that failure can even be a good chance to develop character, learn, add more conflict, etc.

What is their job? What skills do they learn from that? What experiences do they have?

Are they street smart? Book smart? Have common sense? Creative? Or by the book?

Are they emotionally intelligent? Can they analyze and understand others' actions? How good are they at planning?

Note that OP characters aren't really Mary Sues, if they have a good conflict regardless (eg. One Punch Man is unbeatable but still has interesting problems…as a result of his unique situation)

Defense: Vulnerability and openness

Kind of charisma but applied to themselves? Not actually sure how to explain this one so you don't get an explanation

Important because everyone hates miscommunication trope (jk jk….I say as I write a miscommunication arc spanning seven chapters….which I need to edit soon)

How secretive are they? How trusting? Who would they trust? Do they prefer to live in ignorance?

How willing to communicate and how willing to share with others?

Tenacity: Morals and bottom line

Once your character decides to do the thing, how much will they do for the thing? Important to know your characters' limits.

Note: This is partly related to motivations > what your motivations are will obviously affect what you will and won't do, especially if those things go against what you are trying to achieve

Will they kill, steal, lie? Are there some people they won't do those things to (as mentioned in charisma)? Are there things they will do that thing for, even if they are usually against it?

How far do they act before things get too overwhelming? Are there certain things that are too scary or too embarrassing or too risky that they won't do?

What are their morals?

How hard do they work to improve? What do they do to improve? Will they cheat or do things honestly?

Flexibility: Adaptability, self awareness, open-mindedness

The ability or lack thereof to change is important for character development.

How well do they respond to sudden situations? Will they fall and fail and panic in certain ones? Will they remain calm?

How willing are they to accept or give help?

How much do they acknowledge their flaws? How willing are they to improve?

How receptive are they to different opinions? How willing to change their beliefs? How eager are they to change? How much proof or influence from outside until they change?

Motivations: Obviously, goals

What a character wants to do will drive their entire role in the plot. It is the last of the 3 P's: purpose. A character will be unlikely to act against their own goals (although, maybe that can be useful as a plot twist, showing them sacrificing their goals…)

I recommend listing these in priority, as well as acknowledging that some goals will spawn further goals.

Final note: if you wanna write a relationship, you should ensure that the other character likes some of the above traits in their friend/partner/whatever

#writing #writing problems #writing advice #writing tips #someone fucking kill me #btw if ur a student you can get adobe acrobat for free and turn pdfs into pngs #just go to tools and then to export pdf and select as image and then export as png #im so fucking mad that tumblr deleted my whole other post #bruv

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mbti-notes · 2 years

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Anon wrote: How are you? Could you type assess me? Hope I followed the instructions correctly. My conclusion was INTP with immature Ne-Si, however, I'd like to submit to you the reasoning behind my conclusion. Hope I did my homework correctly.

Ti – my decisionmaking process is to think “what is x? if x means y, what does that entail?”. For example, if I am confronted with a situation I think about what possible outcomes can I have? Do I desire those outcomes? How can I act on each of those possible scenarios? And then I analyze which one has the outcome I am more prepared to face. I do not like to be rushed into taking a decison too quick or without knowing all the variables necessary to decide what to do. It’s easy in theory, but in real life we never know if we know all the variables and there isn’t always time to investigate them. I like to formulate hypothesis and analyze them. Usually, I ask “what”, “who”, “how”, “why”, “where”, and “when” questions to do this. Or I think step by step, trying my best to break down the tasks into small chunks (I have executive dysfunction due to ADHD so it’s not always the easiest think ever). I

Te – That’d be similar to the way I described Ti. However, I must admit that I don’t have the best Te doms interest in changing the outside world if it’s not something that caught my attention.

Ne – I’ve read a lot of asked questions on your blog and I have no doubt I have underveloped but high Ne. Signs of unhealthy Ne – I am very willy nilly as you say, I frequently want to change my life or everything I am doing and I expect progress to come in quick leaps. I am not patient to put in the hard work to actualize things I really want. I have learnt a bit late that rules that apply to others also apply to me, in the best way possible. I jump from one thing to the next very often, and it’s very hard for me to learn consistency, but I am trying my best. Why? I think I just find it very challenging to focus on something for too long, something else always become the next new

I also have underdeveloped Ne because due to trauma and hardships I became too afraid to dream of a better life, a bit of a “should I try if there’s the change I am going to fail?” because I have failed many times, only to learn that I should confront my anxiety and try whatever I think it’s worth trying. It’s harder to practice though. But I don’t want my mental pictures to be just pictures, I want to live them in the real world, otherwise it’d be a wasted life. Nowadays I think of the job I want, learn skills to adapt to it, to complete my master’s degree and go after another, and also graduate in philosophy at some point. I’m also very impulsive. It may be a stereotype but I am also very prone to joke around the most uncomfortable situations, as a way to lighten up - sometimes I have this silly fear of not being taken seriously because of that.

Si – I find it very difficult to follow instructions or do things the proper way, this is a constant pattern in my life. Also whenever I am stressed, I keep googling illnesses, medicines I could take to feel better. When stressed, I also ruminate about the past and what I should’ve done or I keep trying to “fix” the past by getting fixated on it. The sense of doom never lasts because I am very prone to think “ok, now I am going to do things differently, I am still 27, I am not old”. Age has also creeped in – ever since I turned 27, I keep thinking I am too old to do the things I wanna do, even though I rationally know this is bullshit. On a positive light, I am not very ambitious, I just want to have a stable life in which I can provide for myself and a future family. My physical space is not ordely nor I care if it is ordely as long I can have a personal system to find the things I use the most (ordering by utility) and makes sense to me. I am also in a comfort zone because I am materially privileged and in my country this means I can study whilst my parents support me and that's a lot in my home country, argentina. I don’t have to worry about getting a job I don’t want and suck it up, so I usually don’t challenge myself – and this bothers me, because it may be a way of self-handcapping. I have been resisting to challenge my comfort position in life even though my head always tells me to do so because I have built nothing in my life, and I really want to. It’s like I am resisting to expose myself to the world beyond my comfort zone (some of it because of anxiety and catastrophizing multiple bad results), so I get stuck in a rut. I’ve been making some progress though, but I am not there yet and as I said on the Ne description, I expect things to happen quickly, almost like a miracle. So far I am convinced I have an unhealthy Ne-Si dynamics and that Ne is calling but I don’t know how to answer to it.

Fe – It’s not that I want to avoid being emotionally involved, it’s just hard. It’s not default for me put emotional investment on doing mundane tasks. It’s hard. I have social anxiety but I connect well with others online. I am not averse to people, I like to have fun just as much as the next person. I worry about being hated by others or if people will use my intimacy against me if we get too close. Like the Si description, it’s something I’ve been working on because it's also a reaction to trauma.

Ni – I have a tendency of getting stuck in my own head and talk to myself a lot there. Sometimes it is a representation of this world but slightly different, as some sort of internal dialogue. At the same time, this picture can change as I live reality and form new pictures, as I discover the pleasures of the outside world. The pictures changes according to the current moment of my life, according to the phase of life I am in. I don’t think I am a Ni user because there are loads of pictures – ie the job picture, the friends picture, intellectual hypothesis – that can quickly change according to evidence or good arguments – and a lot of those pictures are actually daydreams, as if I want reality to conform to whatever I am daydreaming. The content of those daydreams are usually scenarios I wish were real at the moment. I daydream to shape reality but also to avoid it.

Fi – I don’t like to open up about feelings. My feelings are mine. However, I am not a Fi user, even if sometimes I pursue random interests just because I just feel like doing it. Whenever I give advice to others, I usually tell them how I would solve a situation and I can emphatize more if it’s something I experienced myself. I did benefit every time I took care of myself by thinking on doing uncomfortable things (getting out of my comfort zone as a privileged person) for my personal growth.

Se – I sometimes overindulge sensory pleasures, especially when I am anxious, however I am not exactly pragmatic as a Se type would be. I can be really impatient as I mentioned on the Ne description though. Evidence for Se is really weak.

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You didn't follow the instructions properly. You're supposed to contrast at least two entire functional stacks, but you only did the INTP stack. You're supposed to respond, in detail, to every point in the guide for every function of the stack, but you didn't, so the examples remain too vague to be useful and mostly just reveal your misconceptions about the functions. It's also unclear why you included your random thoughts about the other functions without specifying the type and the stack position. You say you have difficulty following instructions, but it is a basic requirement here. I don't like to guess. The reason I'm very insistent that people follow the instructions and structure their profile properly is because I don't have time to sort out everyone's details for them, and I can't achieve certainty without the info I ask for.

I can only offer the following comments:

1) You seem to be lagging in ego development, which means that you suffer from low self-awareness. It's likely that you're merely presenting a version of yourself that isn't close enough to the truth.

2) I don't think you have a good enough handle on your mental health problems. They obscure the truth by causing you to conflate their symptoms with the functions. Almost all the patterns/behaviors you describe are compensatory or defensive in nature, i.e., not natural or inherent to personality type and thus inadequate for determining type. I hope you're getting therapy for the trauma and adhd.

3) INTP seems unlikely. You exhibit too many characteristics that contradict the type. Most importantly, I don't think using this functional stack for personal development is going to lead you in the right direction.

#typing #ask

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jobsrus1 · 4 months

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Girl With a Resume Plan

As I sat there waiting for the line to move forward at the local Kroger, I found myself talking to someone about their struggles trying to find a job. Naturally this would happen to me since I help people find Us to get jobs. They went on and on about how they can’t get most interviews, they don’t get called back or they don’t meet the qualifications. I asked them to show me their resume, I’m not a genius but I have some tricks up my sleeve. I noticed that they just had too much stuff on there, they were getting lost in the shuffle. I gave them all the advice I had and continued about my day. A week later, I was at the same Kroger, in a different line, and there was the man again that I helped with his resume. He said he got a job within that week. He sent out his new resume and viola, there it was.

I wanted to tell that story because it made me feel good, therefore I wanted to put some tips together to send out to the world in case it could potentially help someone else as well. We all can struggle with words, but we struggle most when we must write about ourselves – like a resume. Don’t think about it as if it’s yourself. Think about it as if it’s your best friend and you want them to look gleamingly, flawless. See below for some guidelines to help you write an easy and great resume:

Use a professional font, nothing fancy, you can express fancy in other ways if you’re trying to. Use Times New Roman, Arial, or Calibri.

Never go past writing one page. Some people say two, try to keep it at one.

Add a headshot of yourself. Not a selfie, a family photo or anything with other people, just a nice, clean headshot.

You should always start your resume with an introduction paragraph, that is your pitch to the hiring manager. I suggest writing that last so you can pull key points from your other sections into your introduction.

Always have your contact info at the top under your name or somewhere on the side depending on the template you use.

State your education, always. If you are getting an entry-level position, whether you are a high school GED carrier, a graduate or you have your Master’s Degree, put your highest level of education completed.

State your most recent job, and a job before that. Three jobs max. Complete the name of the job, the location, your job title, and the job duties you had performed but think outside the box. Don’t just say, cash register usage. Say handled funds for revenue responsibly. Put the dates you last worked. The month and year are fine.

List any soft or hard skills that may apply to the position you are seeking to gain.

Put any accomplishments you feel necessary, but this is not required.

I find it appropriate to always put two very high-skilled, high-level individuals you have worked with as references.

Lastly, make more than one resume. Just change the introduction paragraph several times based on the position you are seeking.

For more tips or for some good stories revolving around jobs and the workforce. Check out our next blog.

Signed,

The not so normal, lady behind the JobsRUs.com mask

#jobs #staffingagency #leadership

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garlique · 5 months

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so here is my dilemma today sjdjdjs . day 2 in the field of a new job and yesterday i fucking HATED it and HATED the commute to the point where i cried the whole way home and then ALSO cried for like an hour afterward w my partner about how much i hated it and how miserable i was !! im putting it below a cut bc it'll probly get long but if anyone does read it all tell me if i should quit or try to keep going through it

okay so basically the job is charitable fundraising, face to face on the street canvassing. i dont wanna go into too much detail abt the company structure but the company that hired me is contracted by the IRC to do all their face to face fundraising. so yesterday they did some like intros and some basic dos and donts and then paired us up w someone and said "okay go!!"

here are my issues with it that are just about the job structure and not my own issues: theres no centralization at all and every day i would be going to a different spot. now this would be fine if it was based in tacoma, where i know my way around, and also dont have to ride for an hour on multiple forms of transit to get TO the city. the job is in seattle but i live in tacoma and anyone who sees this who does this commute will understand lol. they'll tell us where we're mesnt to be the next day 'by 8pm the night before' and having to scramble every single night to work out a complicated and frankly expensive commute to a brand new place makes me wanna kill myself sjzjzjzjz

minor issue but we have to use our personal phones and let them location track us for time clock purposes and i truly am not comfortable with that, and it saps my phone battery horribly which is a major source of anxiety for me

also in all their promo materials people had tables they were Sitting behind and for us, it is literally standing still in one spot for 6 fuckin hours a day which like i get it but if i can't walk around or sit i cant do it!!

last major issue is in fact the job itself. and i will admit this is my fuckin fault but i dont even rmr when i applied for this position and i have just been desperately applying for whatever i think i could get. but goddamn i am so tired of jobs where the people i interact with as a RULE treat interactinf with me like a horrible fucking chore or something else awful they have to get through like i can just FEEL the disgust radiating off them and that is so goddamn exhausting to me

now here is where we get into why u Shouldn't quit. the number one answer is that i am less than 2 weeks into quitting nicotine and in like another 2 weeks i SHOULD be a lot more normal. i say should because unfortunately nicotine is a surprisingly effective med for a lot of the mental issues i deal with and i honestly DONT know if i will get back to feeling normal within the month timeframe most people do !! and thats also assuming i dont fuckin relapse at all in that timeframe and am Able to stay off it, which if i stay at this job will probably be very impossible. but i truly just DONT have the necessary emotional regulation skills to deal with what i need to at this job! i dont have the emotional regulatory skills to deal with the constand rejection and brushing off, i just dont have the ability to not take it personally right now. and honestly given everything i dealt with at cascade and how much that affected me i dont know if i Will have those regulatory skills once im thru quitting!!

i dont know. like i want a job where i know im putting Good back into the world but i also dont want tiny fucking returns and rejection and unhappiness, and besides this would be an expensive fuckin job w the commute n the food n everything. i just dont wanna fuckin do it and i feel like with how fast paced everything is in this industry i should probably just fuckin quit now .lmao

i just dont know what to do and we're so brain foggy that we cant even make a fucking decision and im so tired and i dont wanna do it lmao . so someone tell me if i should quit or not !!

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