#i just find it so annoying that everyone's got that desperate need to bring one of them down just to lift the other up | Explore Tumblr Posts and Blogs

purple-babygirl · 11 days

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in the far corner of the forest IV

Pairing: Orc!Bucky Barnes x human!f!reader

Word Count: 6,540

Summary: For the longest time, the kingdom has used Bucky as their number one fighter, forcing him to win their wars for them. The only thing he asked for in return after he was done was that they give him a wife, and they did. They handed him the orphan he picked on a silver platter; it wasn't like anyone would miss her. It would've been perfect if she actually wanted to be there though.

Warnings: mentions of hand injury, idiots in love, feels, jealousy, racism against orcs, angry behaviour, shouting, fight gets slightly physical, bruised arm, crying, angst (i'm sorry). I think that's all.

A/N: good news result in long chapters. thank you from the bottom of my heart for everyone who has wished me good luck with my interview, you guys are angels. please enjoyxx💜💜

“You’re in love.”

“I’m what now!?” Bucky chuckled dismissively as he dropped his axe.

Bucky had spent half a day at home, refraining from going to work because of his hand’s condition, but as much as he loved staying home with her, he knew he wasn’t made to take a break.

So he thought he would visit, talk to Sam for a bit and maybe get some pent up ‘feelings’ out on some tree logs. His metal arm was still working just fine after all.

“I said, you’re in love with your human wife,” Sam repeated, smiling so warmly that Bucky wanted to smack him.

“I got her a few weeks ago.” Bucky shook his head in denial of the mere idea of him falling for anyone, let alone a human.

He did love Sam and Sarah, but that was it. They were the only humans he could tolerate. He hated the rest of them. Hell, he hated the human half of himself.

Bucky was just trying to make life easier for himself, that was all. He has been through enough conflicts and he didn’t need this in his marriage too. He deserved to live a normal life like everybody else.

Yes, he was courting her, and maybe he did constantly crave the feel of her body against his ever since she let him hug her the night of the injury, and he was definitely getting hopeful now that she hadn’t tried to run for a whole half day, but that didn’t mean he was in love! Did it?

“And now you’re in love with her.” Sam smirked, knowing how much it drove Bucky crazy that a female human had him on his knees for her love.

“Quit saying that!” Bucky stood up, ready to walk away from his annoying friend.

“Why does it make you so angry that you’re in lo—”

“Don’t,” Bucky warned him, eyes angry and glaring.

“—ve?”

“I am not in love with her, okay! She’s human! Plus, that girl drives me crazy! Do you know how many times I had to bring her back after she’d tried to run in the first two weeks? Five fucking times! That’s almost once every two days, Sam. And she only had one foot working!” Bucky ranted heatedly, desperate to negate his best friend’s theory.

Was he in love with her? And if Sam could see it, did that mean she could too?

“Well, why do you care to bring her back? Why not just let her run?” Sam shrugged, internally dying for Bucky to acknowledge his feelings.

“She could die out there! Humans are weak.”

“So?” Sam probed, intentionally ignoring Bucky’s remark about humans’ strength.

“So— so I signed all those things when she was offered to me. She can’t— I can’t—”

“You can’t?”

“I can’t let her get hurt,” Bucky admitted lowly, sitting down on a log with a loud sigh.

“Why does that make you so upset?” Sam dug deeper.

“Because I think you’re right. I think I might be in love with her.” Bucky rubbed his eye with his good hand, pushing his hair back angrily.

“And?”

“And she thinks I’m the devil.” Bucky’s face fell to his palms.

“Did she ever say that to you out loud?” Sam asked, touching the end of his sharpened blade.

“She doesn’t need to, Sam. I see it in her eyes every time I find her after she’d tried to run away.” Bucky’s voice was broken like his friend has never heard before.

“I thought you said everything was better after your injury?”

“Yeah, but that’s not gonna last forever.” Bucky gave a sad grin, “she’s soon gonna go back to seeing me the same as before.”

“Well, it’s up to you to change her mind, Buck.” Sam patted his friend’s shoulder, giving a squeeze.

Bucky sighed once more before getting up.

Sam was a human. A very handsome one with much less scars and non-icy skin. He would never understand. It would never work. She hated him.

He could continue trying, but it wouldn’t change anything of the way she felt about him and their marriage. She had told him time and time again how she felt about both.

“Going home already?”

“Yeah, I can’t miss the running away bit. It’s my favourite,” he sighed, Sam's laugh trailing behind him.

“Smile at her for a change.”

“Shut up.” I do smile at her. I only ever smile at her.

“Sarah loved the jam by the way!” Sam yelled.

“I’ll let her know!” Bucky yelled back before exhaling sadly.

Sam would never understand. Her taking pity on him those past couple of hours was nothing more than sympathy and likely even guilt.

Sam would never understand that of all the eyes in the world, it seems like Bucky has managed to fall for the only ones that knew how to hurt him, the eyes that would only look at him as a disgusting, frightening monster.

When Bucky got home, everything was creepily in place. His door was closed like he had left it and he actually had to use his key to open it for the first time in a while.

Stepping inside, the warm smell of roast chicken welcomed him back.

The house was warm because all the windows were actually shut, too. It was all so calm and homely; the orc was seriously worried.

And then he heard it: his human wife’s sweet voice, humming the melody of a song unfamiliar to him. It sounded like it was coming from the kitchen.

Bucky carefully shut the door behind him, not wanting her peaceful mood to end so soon as he tried to take lighter steps to where she was.

Much to his dismay though, she needed something from the other side of the kitchen and when she turned around she saw Bucky and gasped, jumping embarrassingly high.

“You scared me!” She whined, holding a hand to her heart.

“Sorry.” Bucky smirked, entertained by how cute she looked when startled.

“Welcome home,” she mumbled with a bit-back grin, holding onto his forearms before getting on her tiptoes to plant a kiss on Bucky’s cheek.

She never told him, but she was unbelievably thankful when he didn’t specify which type of kiss he expected weeks ago, and even more thankful when he didn’t object to her pecking his cheek before burying herself under the covers.

Life with Bucky has gotten undeniably familiar lately and leaving him was all of a sudden an idea that didn’t interest her as much as before.

Everything he was saying and doing has brought her closer to him without her even comprehending it.

As the days passed, she had realized running away was too exhausting, too risky, and for what? It wasn’t like she had a home to run to or a treasure buried somewhere or a lover worth escaping her orc for.

Her orc.

Hers.

A word she never felt the meaning of until the day Bucky made her his wife.

Bucky was the first and only one to present to her a taste of something she has never had: the feeling of exclusively owning things.

The smile that graced her face when she brushed her hair the first time with the brush Bucky got her was new and unprecedented.

Her brush, he called it.

Her shoes. Her chair. Her towel. Her clothes. Her books. Her side of the bed. Her cottage. Her kitchen.

And her husband.

Everything was brand new and completely hers.

Nothing was handed down to her, nothing was used before the minute her fingers had touched it. None of the things Bucky gifted her had previous owners, including him and his heart.

Most importantly, she didn’t have to share any of it with anybody.

“You’re home,” Bucky said, a surprised yet very happy smile lighting up his handsome features.

“I thought the wife was supposed to say that,” she replied playfully, going back to the bubbling pot.

Bucky raised his eyebrows at the good mood she seemed to be in. He was liking this.

He watched her sprinkle some black pepper into the soup as he came behind her.

She could feel the heat of his body surrounding her even when they weren’t touching and it had her heartbeat going crazy.

“Thank you, little human,” Bucky whispered, before he leaned down and pecked her cheek as well, his stubble and blunt tusks tickling her jaw.

She felt her whole body jolt with electricity at the simple graze of his lips and tusks on her skin as she closed her eyes.

Bucky left the kitchen and went to the bathroom but she was still hot as if his warmth never left her.

And when she opened her eyes and absentmindedly reached her fingertips to touch her cheek, she found herself smiling too.

What was happening to her? What was this foreign feeling lifting her off of her feet in the middle of the kitchen?

“Sam’s sister loved your strawberry jam by the way!” Bucky shouted to her from the bathroom, making her jump again before smiling to herself.

He didn’t use Sarah’s name on purpose, not wanting to ruin her happy mood as he had noticed how angry she got every time he would say it.

“I’ll make her more tomorrow!” She replied with a grin, proud of her hand’s work, her jealousy long forgotten after Bucky’s words of the night before.

After all, how could she be jealous when she was the one that Bucky was looking at like that?

When she finished setting up the table and Bucky didn’t come out of the bathroom, she got a little worried.

He never took too long during his showers, and now that he only had one arm to use, she thought he would cut his showers even shorter.

What if his wound was bleeding again and he didn’t want to tell her and was trying to fix it by himself inside the bathroom? She knew she should have stopped him from going to the yard!

“Bucky.” She knocked on the door softly, wanting to make sure he was okay.

“Yes, little human?” Bucky instantly opened the door for her.

And he looked like a dream.

Steam has surrounded him inside the bathroom, water drops from his still-wet hair dripping down his muscular, bare chest and for the first time since Bucky has been naked around her, she found herself looking at him. Actually looking.

Bucky’s chest was so broad, beefy and ribbed down to his abdomen. Scars of all sizes and shapes littered the beautiful, icy greyish skin, a reminder of the battles he had fought and all the sacrifices he had made.

Her heart clenched at the sight, a pang of sympathy coursing through her as she could only imagine the pain he must have had to endure.

Still, she found her hands tingling in curiosity, desperate to know what tracing the healed skin would feel like under her fingertips.

Bucky was a sight for sore eyes, a sight that both captivated and unnerved her, stirring a flurry of unfamiliar emotions in her chest that she struggled to contain.

She averted her gaze, feeling a wave of embarrassment wash over her at the unexpected intimacy of the moment.

“Are—” she chocked, her voice barely above a whisper as she coughed it out, “are you okay? You took a while.”

“Yeah, I’m just having a hard time drying up my hair with one arm,” Bucky reassured her, chuckling lightly at his dilemma as he let the towel around his neck drop.

He was completely oblivious to the way he just made her face burn up as her thoughts spiraled out of control.

“Come.” She took Bucky’s hand in hers, careful not to squeeze his palm, and led him outside to their bed.

It took Bucky a second to move his feet, but when he did, he felt like he was being carried on top of a cloud.

She felt herself drawn to him in a way she couldn’t quite explain, her heart pounding with a mixture of nervousness, curiosity and… desire. A new sensation was tingling all over her body, specifically in places she didn’t need to be tingling right now.

Positioning herself between his parted legs, she reached to take the towel from around Bucky’s neck.

His eyes watched her, surprise flickering in them as he realized what she was going to do, unable to believe what was happening.

Sensing her nervousness, Bucky offered her a reassuring, grateful smile, silently encouraging her to continue.

And as she began to carefully pat his damp hair dry, her touch tentative and her eyes focused, he felt warmth welling up inside him.

She couldn’t help but steal glances at his bare shoulder and chest, her cheeks burning with embarrassment at the engrossing sight. It was a feeling unlike anything she has ever experienced before, her heart racing with unparalleled excitement.

The awkwardness of the situation began to fade bit by bit as she focused more on the task at hand, in its place growing an overwhelming sense of closeness and familiarity.

Bucky’s hair was so soft under her fingertips as she took the towel up and down the brown locks. She wished she had given herself a chance to touch it more before.

As she finished drying her orc’s hair, she met his gaze with a shy bite of her lip, her eyes sparkling with newfound confidence.

Bucky reached out to take her hands, his smile appreciative as his lips pressed a deep kiss on each palm, silently thanking her for her kindness and care.

“I didn’t know your cooking was so good. You surprise me every day,” Bucky praised, as she filled his mouth with more lentil soup, trying not to think of his conversation with Sam or the way his body was still on fire from the mere act of her drying his hair for him.

He couldn’t even believe she was feeding him after seeing him struggle to keep the food on his spoon using his left hand.

“All the girls at the orphanage know how to cook. They teach us all sorts of things and make us to be good housewives,” she replied, suddenly nostalgic of her days at the orphanage, curious to know how, where and when Bucky got the chance to see her back then.

Bucky didn’t say anything, busying his mouth with chewing some bread as his smile shrank.

She didn’t look happy. Why did she stay then? Was she planning on running away at night that day? Maybe she put something in the food?

“I’m glad you like your dinner though,” she said, breaking the thick silence with a soft smile as she fed the orc a piece of chicken.

“Why didn’t you try to leave today?” Bucky couldn’t hold back.

She was taken aback by his question. She thought he wanted her here.

Was he finally done? Did he want her out? Was he not going to look for her this time? Has Bucky given up on her? Was he going to leave her be had she gotten out today?

Most importantly, she didn’t know how to answer because it seemed like she was done running away from her new life with him, and she didn’t know if she could admit that.

“I– did you want me to?” She asked, her voice strained as she tried to hold in the tears.

“No! No, of course not!” He assured her quickly.

“Then?” She chewed on her lip.

“I don’t want you to stop running if it makes you feel alive,” Bucky told her, his blue eyes gushing with love he didn’t intend to show, “I’m willing to go to the ends of the earth to find you.”

“What?” She wasn’t expecting this at all, all the tingles she had hardly managed to shake off after drying Bucky’s wet hair coming back to attack her.

How were these words coming out of an orc! And why did they make her heart stutter in its beats?

“I love your fiery spirit and I’m afraid I’m killing it by keeping you here against your wishes. I never want to be the one to snuff your fire out.” Bucky admitted, eyes sincere as he watched her.

She just stared at him for a moment, stunned as her heart skipped yet another beat.

If he only knew that he was the one who had managed to bring this fiery personality to life.

Bucky respected her silence and went back to enjoying his dinner, not wanting to push her for a reply. She could take her time.

She kept staring at him in confusion for another minute before taking her almost untouched plate and getting up.

She almost ran to the kitchen with her hand on her heart.

What was going on with her? Her heart wasn’t seriously beating this loud for the orc. Could it be?

He sounded so selfless and spoke so gently like he has never before and she was overwhelmed.

His words were doing things to her that she has never felt before. What was wrong with her?

She knew she had caught herself staring at him without a shirt just minutes ago, maybe admiring his eyelashes as he slept in some early mornings, but she rendered it curiosity and nothing more.

She shook her head, her thoughts startling to her as she emptied her plate in the garbage and started washing it vigorously.

Bucky no longer had an appetite, sighing at her reaction.

He told himself he could understand, but it was still hurtful the way she jumped out of her chair.

He left his plate on the table, not wanting to invade her privacy by going to the kitchen before leaving the cottage altogether.

He probably shouldn’t have said anything.

She revisited the subject the same afternoon though, not wanting there to be any misunderstandings between her and Bucky. Not any longer.

“I don’t wanna leave anymore,” she admitted timidly, making Bucky’s smile betray him and his usual frowning.

“But I don’t like being locked away in here all day either,” she said carefully, scared to upset him.

“Where do you wanna go? The forest is dangerous, little human.” Bucky was back to frowning at the thought of anything bad happening to her again.

It was torture for him when her foot was still healing and he was the most relieved when it finally did. He couldn’t just let her roam around when she didn’t know the area.

“Take me out when you come back from work maybe? Or even on your day off,” she suggested, desperate to see the world.

“And go where?”

“Anywhere. We can walk around the woods before it gets dark, you could show me your shop, I could meet Sam? Or we could even go to the market!” She suggested eagerly.

She has been locked up for so long and she didn’t want to continue her life like this.

Bucky actually thought about it and he didn’t hate the idea. Taking her out with him would ensure her safety. He would be by her side and he would protect her. He also liked the thought of taking her out and properly courting her even if she didn’t know that that was what he was doing.

He said he didn’t want to kill her spirit by keeping her in here and she gave him the solution.

“Okay.” Bucky nodded at her with a smile.

“Okay?” She exclaimed happily, not believing Bucky would actually take her out to see around.

“Okay.” He nodded again reassuringly, her happiness making him laugh.

“Well, don’t you have tomorrow off?” She asked suggestively, gesturing to his hand.

Bucky laughed, nodding, “put your shoes on.”

“Thank you, Bucky.” She involuntarily gave his healing hand a squeeze, kissing his cheek before running to get her shoes.

Bucky swallowed hard, hoping he would be able to hold himself together and not completely melt under her sweet company.

“You’ve got to promise me though,” he said.

She looked at him questioningly as she slipped one foot into a shoe.

“No running away, little human.”

“No running away. Promise.” She promised, shaking her head with a shy smile.

Bucky smiled big, taking her smaller hand in his as she grabbed her basket in the other, ready to browse the market with her husband.

Her husband. That was starting to sound unquestionably comforting.

“Oh, and one more thing.”

“What?” She tilted her head with a grin.

“You owe me a kiss,” Bucky said, his tone serious.

“No, I don’t! If anything, I just gave you an extra kiss!”

“Yes, you do. From that morning. You’re still one kiss behind!”

“I just made up for it!”

“Doesn’t count. That one covers the night before.” Bucky shrugged, a smile etched on his lips.

“Okay, fine.” She kissed Bucky’s cheek, “stop going around saying other girls’ names though.”

Bucky laughed, “I only know one!”

“Still too many,” she whispered under her breath, but Bucky heard it, smiling from ear to ear as he took his hand in hers, taking the right path out of the woods. ~ It was a beautiful afternoon, full of warm sunshine and fruitful deals. She has got some pretty good stuff for really good prices.

She couldn’t believe Bucky actually gave her pocket money.

He didn’t want her to have to ask him for money every time something caught her eye. He wanted her independent, fulfilled and brave as she bought herself whatever her heart desired.

Her heart was so full and her smile was inerasable.

Bucky didn’t let go of her hand all day and she actually liked it so much that she never complained. The feel of his calloused skin against her soft palm wasn’t like anything she has felt before.

She didn’t want to let go of his hand even while looking at the different stands and booths at the market.

But she eventually liked the flower stand too much and told Bucky she would take a look at them while he continued buying them the fruits he was picking.

“Good afteroon,” a smooth voice interrupted her admiration of the potted plants before her, making her look up for a second.

“Good afternoon.” She smiled coyly.

“Any favorites?” The handsome man inside the booth asked her.

“All of them,” she giggled softly, the sound catching Bucky’s ears at once.

The man laughed back, “okay, I think I have something special for you. How about this one?” He brought her a purple flower from the batch hidden behind him inside the booth.

“Oh, how beautiful! What is this one?” She wondered, amazement sparkling in her eyes at the sight of the pretty petals.

“That is a Globemaster Allium. Pretty, isn’t she?” He asked, staring at her desirously as she looked at the flower.

“Yes, she’s stunning!”

“I’m Cole by the way—”

She heard Bucky clear his throat next to her and looked up at once, the innocent awe in her eyes softening the orc a little.

“Look, Bucky! Isn’t this the most beautiful thing you’ve ever seen?” She pointed to the flower pot excitedly.

Bucky leaned in, his frown scaring her a little, her breath hitching when his lips tickled the shell of her ear, “no, little human, you’re the most beautiful thing I’ve ever seen.”

She chocked on her own saliva, hiding her hot face with her hand as she coughed, “Bucky!” She whined with a shy smile.

Where did that come from!

“Let’s go,” Bucky said with a nod of his head, eyes stern as he glared at Cole.

“Can—” She held his wrist, “can I have it?” She asked softly, gesturing to the flower pot.

Bucky wanted to say no. He didn’t want her to have this farmer’s flower. But he couldn’t say no to those hopeful, beautiful eyes of hers.

“Fine.” He watched her get the money out of her pocket and she smiled gratefully as she almost set them down on Cole’s counter.

“It’s on the house,” Cole said, still smiling dreamily at her.

She could all but swallow as she gave a polite smile back before looking up at Bucky for help.

“Take your goddamn money.” Bucky made a quick job of paying for the flower, taking the money from her and slamming it on the counter, making the whole booth shake.

He quickly took his wife home, deciding that was enough socialization for the both of them for the day.

She wasn’t going to lie, she was loving jealousy on her orc. It felt so intoxicating to have someone love her so much that he was jealous of other men talking to her.

She wouldn’t tell Bucky, but she would probably spend the nights of the next week smiling at the wall every time she remembered how he held her hand back home just a little bit tighter that day.

Her own heart was running wild at the sight of the orc now and she didn’t want it any other way.

“Now you know how it feels,” she teased with a smile as they were getting ready for bed.

Bucky couldn’t let it go, talking about how they were never going to stop by that farmer’s flower booth ever again.

“That’s not the same! I was never into Sarah! But that man was openly ogling you!” Bucky grumbled, his frown digging deep into the skin of his forehead.

“He was just being nice, trying to sell his flowers,” she laughed, upsetting Bucky even more.

How couldn’t she see it? The guy was all over her!

“He was flirting and you were all giggles and blushes.” Bucky copied her, going to the bed and burying himself under the covers, facing the wall.

He understood now why she had done that.

“Hey, that’s my spot!” She joked, not knowing if Bucky was being serious.

“Not tonight,” he murmured from underneath the covers.

“Bucky,” she whined, uncovering her orc’s face.

Bucky didn’t reply, pushing himself closer to the wall.

She tried to bring him on his back by the shoulder like he so easily did her a couple of night ago, but he was too strong for her and his body wouldn’t budge.

She huffed, “okay, you left me no choice.”

Bucky remained still, wanting to see what she meant by that as he felt her shift behind him.

Before he knew it, she was on top of his bicep, trying to slot herself between his body and the wall.

“What on earth—”

“You started it, Bucky!” She said, voice determined as she kept pushing, trying to squeeze herself in the small space accessible.

Bucky looked at her in amusement for a second before moving back, making her body drop as larger space became available.

She landed with the tiniest “ouff” on the mattress, facing Bucky on her side with her back to the wall, its coolness helping soothe the heat rising to the surface of her skin.

That was the closest she had been to Bucky since their hug the night of his injury, face to face as his passionate sapphire eyes watched hers.

“Hi,” she whispered, heart in her throat.

“Hi,” Bucky replied with a charming smile, smoothing some of her ruffled strands back in place.

She stared at the orc’s eyes, not the slightest bit scared of the fact that she was trapped against the wall by his huge body.

“You’re not the only one who wants to be loyal to this marriage, Bucky,” she said, surprising Bucky and herself, “I don’t want the farmer. I don’t want anyone else.” but you.

Bucky smiled in disbelief, taken aback by her words, and she took it as permission to move closer to his chest. He instinctively wrapped her up in a protective hug, wondering how he was able to hold himself back from kissing her.

She pushed her face into her orc’s chest, his scent and warmth engulfing her into a protective bubble.

She couldn’t believe she said the words she has just said and it made her bury her burning face deeper in Bucky’s arms.

He could only hug her tighter, his nose in her sweet-smelling hair as his smile grew bigger.

This moment right there was everything Bucky has ever wished for. He could die a happy orc right then and there.

It became a habit for them to go out to the village on Bucky’s day off. They were both having a great time, getting closer and falling harder.

Cole hasn’t spoken to her again after learning that the snow orc was actually her husband, and she respected Bucky’s feelings and never approached Cole’s booth no matter how pretty the plants on his stand were.

Market outings were their thing now and she wasn’t going to let anything ruin that.

She didn’t want anyone else’s attention but Bucky’s anyway. His hand has almost fully healed and she could now squeeze it all she wanted whenever she got excited about anything they encountered.

One thing did occur that annoyed her though and that was the way the jewelry lady would look at her every time she and Bucky would pass by. The woman had so much pity in her eyes when she saw her hand in an orc’s and she hated it.

She despised the way people misjudged her orc when he was far better than any human man she could’ve ever ended up with.

Yet, the lady kept giving her those pitiful looks, probably thinking Bucky had enslaved her or something.

But enough was enough.

When Bucky was busy looking at the knives, she made her way to the jewelry lady, determined to put an end to the ridiculousness.

“He is my husband,” she sternly told the lady in the jewelry stand, taking the chance that Bucky wasn’t listening.

“Oh.” The lady quickly gave a kind smile, turning from concerned about her to happy for her, “I apologize for misjudging you, dear. I was only worried about you. We’ve all heard stories about him.”

“Well, that’s all they are. Stories.” She ferociously defended, her eyes still stern.

“I’m sorry,” the woman sincerely expressed her regret, squeezing her hand.

She nodded with a small smile, accepting the older woman’s apology.

“I don’t see a ring on your hand.” The jewelry lady gestured to the collection of rings in her glass box with a wink.

“Oh.”

The sentence caught Bucky’s ears as he turned away to look at her embarrassed face.

“We didn’t get time to buy one. It all happened so quickly,” she explained awkwardly and Bucky’s expression fell.

“I have a pretty collection if you wanna take a look, and don’t worry about the price,” the older lady suggested kindly.

“No, it’s okay—”

“Choose what you like, sweet thing,” Bucky whispered to her, immediately by her side when he saw her eyes skimming over the jewelry, “I’m sorry I’m not familiar with the human marriage traditions. I should’ve gotten you one sooner.”

“It’s okay, Bucky. You don’t have to,” she reassured with a tender smile.

She didn’t need a ring to know that she was Bucky’s.

“I want to. I want you to wear my ring, little human.” Bucky raised her hands to his lips, placing the softest kisses on her each finger.

Her heart surged as a shy smile spread on her lips, heat rising to her cheeks.

“Okay.” She nodded happily, feeling like she was in a dream and she never wanted to wake up.

Though very expensive, Bucky ended up buying her the ring she chose. It was the prettiest gold ring with a moss agate blue diamond.

She tried to talk him out of it, wanting to pick something cheaper, but Bucky wouldn’t have it.

She has never felt as special as she felt with Bucky’s ring on her finger. It was the prettiest thing from the most handsome orc.

And in that very moment, she was the happiest that she trusted her gut; that she gave Bucky, and herself a chance for this marriage to be something more than a contractual deal.

Bucky couldn’t believe she has finally let him make her his. When he slipped that ring on her tiny finger, he felt like he was king of the world.

While walking back to their cottage, a new dream got unlocked inside of her, one that included her and Bucky and their very own little stand in the market.

“Can we stop by the shop before we go home?” She asked tentatively.

“Sure, why? Did you forget something there yesterday?”

She has been to the shop a couple of times, curious to meet the important people in Bucky’s life and possibly have friends of her own, too.

“No, just wanna show Sarah the ring,” she said, a shy smile lighting up her happy face.

Bucky brought her hand to his lips, kissing her ring finger this time, “to the shop it is.”

Everything was going amazingly and she wished with all her heart that it would stay that way, but unfortunately, the very next day was a day for another fight that none of them saw coming.

Bucky still hasn’t recovered from her little stunt a few weeks ago and today he came back to find the cottage empty again.

He should have locked the door. He shouldn’t have trusted that a ring on her finger might stop her old habits or give her a magical change of heart.

What about all the small moments she had shared? Did those mean nothing to her?

Bucky’s anger and feeling of betrayal wiped away everything nice that had happened between the two of them, only remembering that she never wanted to be here in the very first place.

“Why are you so adamant about making me lose my mind?” Bucky asked, pushing her inside and slamming the door behind them.

“I’m not! Would you just listen?!” She yelled back, startled by the harsh treatment.

“What the hell were you thinking?!” Bucky shouted as if he didn’t hear her.

“I was just—”

“Wandering through the forest alone is dangerous, I’ve told you time and again, and yet you keep doing it!”

“Would you listen to me?!”

“No! You acted like you would stop running, so what changed?!” Bucky threw his big arms in the air, making her take a step back.

Bucky looked bigger than he usually did when he was livid like that.

“I wasn’t running!” She repeated, her voice tinged with anger of her own at the distrust.

“Stop lying!” Bucky growled, roughly grabbing her by the arm.

“I’m not lying,” she insisted as she tried not to wince at the way Bucky held her forearm, her jaw clenched defiantly.

“Then what were you doing up the hill, huh?” Bucky unconsciously squeezed her arm harder.

“You’re hurting me.” She tried to pull away, but Bucky wouldn’t release her.

“You think you’re the only one who has fucking feelings?” Bucky shook her in his hold, unintentionally bruising her further.

She cried out but it fell on deaf ears, “Bucky, let me go!”

“Do you think what you do doesn’t affect me just because I’m not a goddamn human?!” He forced her closer, making her tears fall as he barked in her face.

His words hung heavy in the air, echoing through the spacious room.

“Bucky, please,” she tried again, not wanting to fight anymore.

Bucky finally listened, suddenly shocked at his actions as he let her arm go.

It’s been so long since he had made her cry and he just ruined everything good he had worked on building with her.

She just stood there, whimpering in pain as she held her arm to her chest.

Bucky watched her roll the sleeve of her winter dress up to look at her arm and there they were: thick fingerprints on her flesh.

“I— I’m sorry,” he whispered, trying to get closer to look at her arm, swallowing hard.

To his surprise, she let him.

“I’m sorry, little human.” Bucky wiped a few of her tears away, regret evident in his voice.

“I wasn’t running,” she repeated, pushing her hands in the pockets of her dress, “I was collecting berries to decorate the cake I made earlier.” She pulled handfuls of now ruined wild strawberries, raspberries and blackberries out of her pockets and dropped them on the wooden table for him to see.

She left Bucky alone to stare at the berries and went to the kitchen.

And boy did he stare.

He felt so stupid and ashamed at the way he had reacted. He just hurt her and she wasn’t even trying to leave. He wouldn’t let her explain either and had unjustly judged her.

She got out a cold water bottle from the fridge, pushing it to her bruised arm.

Bucky walked into the kitchen, shame branded on his face.

“Are you okay?” He asked, not knowing what to do to correct his mistake.

“What do you think?!” She irritably snapped at him, waving her bruised arm in the air.

“I just wanted to help!” Bucky barked back.

“Well, I don’t want your help!” She shouted.

“Fine! Don’t want it!” Bucky walked out, his feet stomping on the wooden floors.

He stormed out of the cottage, violently slamming the door behind him.

Bucky then realized what he has just done and how he had made the situation even worse. He kicked a rock so hard he was sure it flew to the other side of the forest as he saw birds flying disruptively.

“Damn it!” He yelled out loud, slamming his fist to the door, making her flinch inside the cottage.

The fight between the orc’s rough exterior and his rather tender feelings for her was torturing Bucky. What he meant to show was that he cared about her and was worried for her, but instead he’d done what he’d done.

She, on the other side of the wall, irately got out of the kitchen with the trash bin and swept the berries from the table, throwing them in the garbage.

When Bucky got inside again, she was cleaning the stain of the berries from the table, her features still twisted in a frown.

He opened his mouth, trying to think of anything he could say to fix this, but nothing came out. With a sigh, he left the cottage once more, leaving her all alone.

She sat down with a huff, throwing the cloth in her hand across the room.

She let her tears run in frustration.

It was supposed to be a peaceful night where they enjoyed a delightful desert that she has worked hard on making and was going to work hard on decorating.

She was trying to start a life with him. Why did he have to ruin it like that? She wasn’t running. How could she make him believe her?

She desperately wanted, needed Bucky to trust her.

She cried harder, feeling helpless in the face of her orc’s rage as her heart clenched at the thought of a happiness gone so soon.

Part V

Tag List:

@harrysthiccthighss @tinystudentfirepurse @lavendercitizen @tumblin-theworldaway @pretty-pop-princess-hs @lilymurphy03 @idontwannagomrstarkk @glxwingrxse @littlelioncub43 @mathletemadison @canned-rootbear @pandaxnienke @loveisallyouneed1125 @floral-recs @littlemoonkiller @hallecarey1 @vespasianphantom @vicmc624 @winters1917 @ionlyeverwantedtobeyourequal @blkmystery @millercontracting @trappedwriter @am-3-thyst @obsessedwithquinn @sydnielauryn @alittlerayof-pitchblack @olipiaa @peterparkersgirl-blog @buckybarnessweetheart @thealyrs @colorfulbluebirdpainter @stuckysgirl27 @ihavetwoholesforareason @princess-bee0 @pastel-noah168 @steeph-aniie @buckitostan @onthr-dream @sapphirebarnes @123iloveyou456 @ciaqui @lindasweetie @justherefortheficandsmut @xxdiaqiaoxx @morgthemagpie @wintrsoldrluvr @goldylions @serendipitouslife90 @sebastians-love @leelee1234love

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plmp0 · 18 days

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The Sex Love House PT 3

Summary: Welcome to the love house where a lot of stories will infold, 7 participants will have a chance to live together in the same house for a mounth while still doing their normal activities, will they find real love in this short period? Or at least this is what ur friend want u to believe. Part 1 Part 2

Warnings: a very manipulative!jay, manipulative!sunghoon, manipulative!heeseung, ex!bf!Jake, everyone is a perv in this house, reader is clueless, shameless reader, kinda stalker reader, Siyeon (from dreamcatcher) is also part of this, this is a pure filth, explicit content.

Smut warning: hand!job, oral (f), cum eating, desperate Jake, kind of subby!jake, p in v, unprotected sex (cause it's fiction), overstimulation, a lot of teasing, i think that's it

A/N: This part was supposed to go out a long time ago but i forgot to save it and i had to re-write it again so it's not as good cause i got annoyed sorry. Also this is not proof read so there might be some mistakes and typos so yeah

It's the week-end Jake woke up today going straight to ur room knocking on ur door before entering, u were still in ur shower robe hands blow drying ur hair as he looked at u through the mirror "oh hi i was going to talk to u after i finish, we didn't get a chance to yesterday" u said upon brushing ur hair.

He noded his head eyes scanning u, u got more beautiful since the last time he saw u, he's ngl he forgot about u at some point but he just woke up one day having u running through his head, what could u be doing now? Did u get taller? Did u let ur hair grow? How many relationships have u been through? He had these small thoughts about u, but everytime his heart tries to soften to u, the memory of ur ghosting and its side effects come back to him, it was like a trauma for him, getting in the way of every relationship he tried to be in, always having doubts about the other part, not able to trust her fully, he really has abandonement issues now.

"There is no need to bring back what happened in the past" u said getting him out of his thoughts, u turned off the blowdryer approaching him eyes softening now that he is close to u, ur guilt kicking in immediatly "m so sorry for what i did, i know nothing can excuse what i did but i wasn't mature enough" u said holding his hand in urs, he cleared his throat avoiding looking at u, pulling out his hand gentely and that was enough for u to know that he didn't forget u.

U sighed feeling bad but deciding to brush off the topic "so tell me, what r u doing now?" U asked hoping to get rid of the awkwardness noting how he didn't let a word out.

He smiled shrugging "i took over my dad's work"

U smiled back remembering how sweet his dad used to be and how good he treated u "i hope he is doing fine"

"He is" was all he replied with, taking a seat on ur bed "ahh right! Do u want something?" U asked after runing out of ideas to lighten the mood, he sighed hands massaging his forhead "i just wanted to ask if u have some pain relievers"

"Ohhh? Ur head hurts?" U asked hands busy searching in ur drawer for the said pills, taking it out and handing it to him "here" he took it from u thanking u and putting it in his pocket .

U sat on ur chair facing him now forgetting that u r still in ur robe that is about to open in any second now, ur hair isn't fully dry u look so... so tempting Jake's eyes can't help but stare at u head empty only u running through it.

"U don't want the guys to know that we were together?" U asked after talking for sometime now without getting a reply from him.

He cleared his throat again " ah idk i didn't know if u'd like them to find out so i chose to not say anything" he shrugged, u smiled at him he is still considerate as always "i don't really mind but since we didn't talk about it the first time let's just keep it between us"

He smiled back wanting to stay with u longer, seeing u now in front of him again brought back his old feelings towards u.

U heard ur phone ring on the table behind u "excuse me" u let out softly turning back and stretching to get it without standing from ur seat, exposing ur bare thighs and a faint sight of ur blue panties to Jake whose eyes were boring into u tongue darting on his lower lip , he gulped hands sweating and itching to feel ur soft skin, u smiled at ur succeed attempt to get ur phone seating properly now and answering ur call, Jake's eyes didn't leave u even for a second scanning the way u pout whenever something is not pleasing u, the way u roll the end of ur hair listening to what's been said on the other line, lips smiling from time to time flashing ur white teeth, everything about u was beautiful and he miss having u for himself.

U made eye contact with him in the middle of the call mouthing a sorry, Jake only smiling at u as he waited for ur call to end (but wishing it to take longer so he can drink in ur beautiful features more).

U ended the call that was from one of ur co-workers asking u about some file u wondering why tf they want that in the week end, u sighed looking at Jake noting the way he is looking at u.

"That took longer than i expected sorry"

He didn't budge even when u waved ur hand in front of him, only waking up when he heard ur soft voice calling his name and he almost let a sound out from that "are u okay? U r spacing out a lot" u asked concerned, eyes looking at the way his adam apple boped down before hearing him gulp loudly.

He shakes his head like he was in some sort of trance head dizzy as he inhaled u r fresh smell now that u approached him " m fine dw" u sat next to him, resting ur back on the wall and he followed ur movement head titling to face u " u r still as beautiful as u were" he let out making u blush a little bit as u give him a thank u chewing on ur lips fingers playing with the hem of ur robe.

He massaged his shoulders letting out a small groan and u turned to look at him he really look so tired "do u want me to give u a massage it's gonna help u relax a little bit" u said.

And he stayed still for a minute thinking about ur offer before noding in agreement, u stood up going to take an oil u use whenever u wanna relax "come on lay down" u rushed him and he did "i think it'd be better if u remove ur shirt" u said as he removed it and tossed it somewhere on the bed, u straddled his back he pressed his face on the matress upon feeling ur weight on top of him, his body shivering when the cold oil met his skin ur hands following after, massaging his nerves skilfully, he shut his eyes his body relaxing while releasing soft groans every now and then.

U were so good with ur hands he almost fell asleep if it wasn't for the unintentional scrach he felt on his back, u just continued working ur magic ignoring the way his body squirmed, u smirked a little bit knowing exactly how he liked that, u kept digging ur nails on his skin saying a sorry with a fake pout whenever u do so.

He could feel his muscles tensing up again, his forehead now resting on his hands teeth biting his lower lip not wanting to let a sound out, but it was impossible at this point especially when u brushed ur fingers faintly over his soft spot, u knew his body so well doing the most to get a reaction out of him, ur competitive side kicking out until a moan skipped his lips making u stop ur movements immediately "ohhh?" U said mockingly leaning forward until ur lips met his ears "u r still the same Jakey" he whimpered his hips humping the mattress shamelessly making u chuckle "what are u doing?" U asked faking a confused tone as u moved from his body standing in front of him. Jake titled his head looking at u confusion written all over his face, u cocked an eyebrow at him as he didn't stop his movements his eyes boring into ur body that was all exposed for him at this point, the robe not doing any job at hiding ur skin, the small curls at the end of ur hair still wet arms crossed waiting for him to speak but he didn't, u sighed clenching ur jaw slightly leaning forward lifting his chin with ur index finger "where r u looking? My face is here" u exclaimed wanting to get something out of him but his eyes are fixed on ur lips, u dart ur tongue on them watching how his own mouth is open almost drooling at the sight of you. Jake has always been like that, everything u did used to turn him on, and it looks like nothing changed.

U chuckled softely kneeling on the floor so u can face him blinking slowely as u caressed his cheeks titling ur head and getting closer to him until ur noses touched u were planing to tease him a little bit more but he rushed kissing u like he was starving for years, his lips moving so fast tongue rolling around urs u let go of his cheeks one hand now around his neck while the other one is searching for his hair tugging slightly as he moans in the kiss.

U left his mouth panting for some air, u looked his way and u can't help the heat that went to ur cheeks when u saw him, he looked so fucked out just from a kiss coming closer to kiss u again "so eager" u thought

U kissed him again his hands holding onto ur thighs, Jake now sitting properly without breaking the kiss making u also stand and straddle his lap, u started rolling ur hips slowly his hands following your pace, his thumbs tracing circles on ur inner thighs, ur hand going from his hair to his neck applying a small pressure and he groaned in the kiss.

"Shhh" u warned him and he whined in return making u smile in the kiss as ur hands traveled to his pants, unbuttoning them and sliding them down his knees along with his boxers, he let a deep breath out his body tensing up as he waited for u to touch him, the anticipation killing him.

"Please" he managed to mutter out his dick twitching in the cold air as his head tilted backwards and a sigh left his lips when u wrapped ur hand around his cock.

Ur thumb pressed on his slit collecting the precum that is oozing from it and spreading it along his length, his grip on ur thighs tighten as his body shakes under ur touch, he moaned in the kiss the need of breathing making him part his lips slightly, his moans were so loud despite him trying to stay silent his eyes were rolling to the back of his head.

His hips started moving up to meet ur strokes as his moans increased in volume, u felt him getting close, ur thumb now pressing on his slit again teasing him by stroking the base and going to the top before repeating the same process.

"Baby" he moaned against ur lips as his hips buckled upwards his stomach and chest rising, his hands are gripping ur thighs tightly, his nails digging in ur flesh, his toes curling as his mouth parted in a silent scream the only thing coming out of his mouth was a gasp as his eyes rolled back.

His dick twitched a few times his cum landing on ur robe and his chest, ur eyes were scanning the view, his head was still resting on the bed his eyes closed, his whole body shaking still feeling the waves of his orgasm, he was so sexy like this, and u can't deny that the thought of him getting off just from u stroking him made u so turned on, u were sure that your panties were soaked wet.

He was catching his breath when he felt u getting off his lap, he opened his eyes, his chest moving up and down, his dick still twitching as he saw the mess he made.

"Fuck y/n im sorry" he said trying to grab a tissue but his body was numb and his mind hazy.

U didn't pay him any attention going straight to ur closet pretending to get another robe and discarding the dirty one on the ground.

Jake was looking at u his dick already hardening again his eyes were roaming over ur body his gaze fixated on the curve of ur ass and the way the blue panties hugged ur thighs.

He wanted to eat u alive, he wanted to make u cry out his name, he wanted to fuck u, and u wanted the same, his dick was pulsating against his stomach, and all his senses were focused on u.

U felt his stare, turning back to face him a smirk forming on ur lips as u took a step forward and his hands were instantly on ur waist pulling u down on his lap, he attacked ur neck kissing, biting and sucking on it, he didn't want to leave a mark so he didn't suck for a long time, he went lower until his teeth bit ur collar bone his hands pulling down the new robe as his lips met the top of ur breast leaving kisses and licks.

"Oh" a sigh escaped ur mouth as u tilted ur head backwards, his right hand went down cupping ur clothed pussy while his left hand held onto ur waist for support.

He started moving his fingers, drawing circles on ur clothed clit, he didn't stop the movement of his mouth on ur breast as u started grinding against his hand. Jake was like a starving man, his touches so earger, his actions desperate.

U held onto his shoulders for support as he pushed u back laying on the matress, his body covering ur smaller frame as he started sucking on ur right breast his hand moving away the panties and entering two fingers inside ur pussy making you arch ur back as a gasp left ur lips.

His fingers were hitting the right spot and he went to kiss you again, his mouth making it hard to breathe, the pleasure was too much, ur eyes were watering, and his dick was rubbing against ur thigh, Jake broke the kiss panting like a dog delivering kisses on you stomach as his thumb was circling your clit, u were so sensitive his every move was sending shivers down ur spine, he was so focused on pleasing you, and it wasn't hard for him to get the job done, it's like he has been dreaming about this for a long time, he was now on a face level with your pussy he groaned biting his lips before replacing his thumb with his tongue, a scream slipped your lips and your back arched high in the air, his grip on ur waist was bruising, he didn't want to let go.

He hummed upon tasting you his eyes closed tongue going wild making it hard for you to contain ur moans and u were sure by now that if Heeseung was in his room he 100% have heard you, his room next to urs and that just added to ur heat making u go crazy, you were close by now already worked out just from earlier, Jake's finger went deeper making you let out a cry hands tugging at his hair and he moaned upon that "Cum for me" he mumbled against your pussy, the vibrations of his voice enough to make u reach your peak.

You cried out his name legs shaking uncontrollably, head dizzy, and chest heaving, and Jake didn't stop licking on ur clit not even giving u time to calm down and recover from ur first orgasm, "No-omg" your hands went to pull him away but instead you found them back on his hair pushing his face closer, his tongue was so skilled and u can feel yourself getting close again letting out small cries , the feeling of his tongue was so amazing and u can feel your whole body burning up, it didn't take long before u came again squirting on his face this time.

Jake pulled away his lips wet, face glistening with your juices, his eyes dark, "That's so fucking hot" he muttered licking his lips and wiping his face with his hands, he was looking at you hungrily, his cock red and dripping with precum, you wanted him inside you.

"C'mon here" u said pulling him closer for a sloppy kiss tasting yourself on his tongue as you started moving your hips, both of you were a moaning mess, the need to be close was so strong.

"Jake" u moaned against his lips and he hummed eyes still closed "fuck me" you said and his eyes shot open his mouth hanging open his breath got caught in his throat, and u smiled at him softly you were always a fan of his reactions always acting like he hasn't heard these words before as if it's his first time and you were sure that he was now going crazy, ur words made him feel like his heart is about to explode.

He didn't hesitate to get between your legs, his dick rubbing against ur wet folds as his mouth went to suck on your neck, your hands went to his back leaving red scratch marks as his tip was pressing on your hole, the need to enter was strong his eyes scanning your expressions as he entered you, a satisfied sigh escaped both of you lips, you were so warm and wet around him he didn't have any energy to start slow, his thrusts were hard and rough his hands holding onto the sheets as his hips met yours with a slap, the air was filled with your moans and the sound of skin slapping, the bed creaked underneath you and you could hear it hitting the wall, it's not a surprise if u end up with a hole in the wall, and he was going so fast he didn't give you a chance to adjust his cock hitting the right spots, "fuckk you feel so good Damn" he groaned his hips moving by themselves his head dropped enjoying the way you feel around him, your hands went to his back pulling him closer wanting to feel him deeper, his chest was now touching yours, his skin was so hot and he was sweating a lot, you can see his veins popping his mouth hanging open as his forehead was touching yours, his thrusts becoming more aggressive and it was hard to catch your breath, you can feel yourself getting close for the third time tonight your stomach twisting and your eyes rolling to the back of your head, Jake's hand moved away from the sheets gripping the headboard as he was slamming into you loving how you moan his name, he was close, so close, his dick twitched inside of you.

He was so lost in pleasure he had other plans for you but he forgot about everything focusing only on the delicious feeling of you he swear he hasn't felt this good since being with you, he doesn't know why but u just enjoys it more when it's you, his thrusts were now unrhythmic moaning as his hands went to the pillow and you let out a surprised yelp when his other hand grabbed a fistful of your hair pushing your head back loving how you look for this angle ,his cock was throbbing and pulsating inside you the knot in your stomach was so tight and you could feel yourself reaching your peak, Jake was grunting his eyes shut curses leaving his lips "fuckk fuck fuck" and you could feel the tears building up so sensitive from the previous releases and it was a matter of time before both of you came at the same time, he pulled out after spilling his seeds all over your stomach.

He let go of your hair and collapsed on the bed next to you, both of you were panting your minds were blank and the air was still thick, the room smelled of sex, Jake's hair was sticking to his forehead, his chest was moving up and down, the only sound in the room was the heavy breathing. You were laying there trying to come back from the high, you looked at Jake his eyes closed, his face still sweaty and red, your eyes moved lower, his chest and stomach are covered with his own cum and he didn't seem to mind.

You chuckled "what?" He asked eyes opening to look at you.

"Look at the mess" you said pointing at his stomach, he sat up a little bit checking it out wanting to say something but he stopped after seeing you crawling, ur hands dropping his body back as u leaned down collecting all the cum that was on his body licking it up making sure to leave no trace behind Jake had to slap himself to see if he was dreaming, his eyes were bulging and his mouth was dry 'fuck you are so sexy y/n" it was too much, too many feelings all at once, it was hard to control the heat pooling in his groin and he can feel himself getting hard again, he let a deep breath out when you stopped to show him the cum u collected before swallowing it.

"Fuck so dirty" he said pulling you for a heated kiss, your tongue battling his for dominance, he was already hard again his body was aching for u and u couldn't help but rub your pussy against his shaft.

"Please" he begged, and as much as u wanted him you were sure that your body can't take anymore, already sore from yesterday and the events that took place minutes ago.

"Next time Jakey" u said pecking his lips and he whined, his hands went down to rub your pussy and u let him, u were sure that you can't do it but a few moments later u were bouncing on his cock again.

You sighed after what happened Jake stayed with your for a bit helping you move to the shower wanting to help but u stopped him wanting to relax for few minutes and have an alone time and he nodded pecking ur forehead and leaving. You took longer than intended cleaning your body lazily, you went out expecting to find a mess in ur room, ur robe thrown on the ground along with ur panties and the sheets wrinkled but instead everything was neat your clothes on the basket another sheets on the bed and that alone made your day.

Jake was sweet and caring as always and ur heart ached with guilt, ur mind was still in shock from everything but you didn't have the energy to spend a long time thinking, you dressed up wearing a long blue dress with a small slit on your left leg, drying your hair only with a towel putting on some perfume and walking out. U heard some noises on the living room and u followed finding everyone except from Jake and Siyeon sitting on the table having breakfast

Jay's eyes followed your every move his jaw almost dropping, the sight of your thighs driving him insane and it was so unfair, "wow y/n u look so beautiful" Heeseung said devouring you with his eyes and Joy nodded her head while Sunghoon didn't say a thing his eyes scanning u head to toe while stuffing his mouth with food, Joy pulled the chair next to her patting it for you "come on". She is such a sweetheart and u can't help the smile forming on your lips, you took the seat sitting now between her and Sunghoon and across from Heeseung and Jay, a small groan slipping Jay's lips when he saw u sitting so close to Hoon, his eyes were dark remembering yesterday's night but he wanted to take care of you today not liking how he let u go without helping. He grabbed ur plate putting a big amount of various food and handing it to u making u chuckle "i don't think m gonna be able to finish this but thank u" u said softly making him smile as well "enjoy, u need to regain ur energy".

Joy and Heeseung were talking about something but u can't pay attention u didn't realize how much hungry u re until u had ur first bite of food. "I thought u were going out this morning" Heeseung asked eyes not leaving ur face wondering what kind of excuse u'll make after he woke up to ur moans and you could feel ur cheeks heating up remembering the events that took place just few hours ago, u cleared ur throat shaking ur head "i changed my mind" u replied trying to avoid eye contact and laughing awkwardly afterwards, Heeseung grinned nodding his head pretending to believe u "Ahhh i see" he said. Joy's eyes roamed on the table "Where is Siyeon?" she asked particularly no one and Jay answered "She still have things to do at her house but she'll be back this afternoon"

"Where is Jake?" Sunghoon asked after a while and Jay was the one to answer him again "He left few minutes they called him from work"

U nodded, it was obvious that he didn't want anyone to find out, "How did u sleep last night?" Heeseung asked u and Jay chocked on his drink while you almost spit your food, Sunghoon who was taking a sip of his tea was now coughing loudly, Joy turned to look at him her eyebrows raised "are u ok?" She asked and he gave her a thumbs up eyes watering, Heeseung was laughing at the reaction of everyone his eyes meeting with yours and you could feel the heat on ur cheeks. "Oh my god u look like a tomato" he commented still laughing and u kicked his leg with ur feet under the table so embarrassed wishing that a black hole could swallow u and take u away from this place.

Sunghoon was now smirking loving to see u in that state remembering meeting with you yesterday when u were about to head to ur room after getting out of Jay's room sweating, face flushed and lips swollen ur robe closed messily and ur hair was in a very terrible state, u stopped at ur steps upon noticing his shadow turning to see him in front of you and u really tried to act normal but there was no point of that at that rate, so u just decided to do what u do everytime = running to ur room and die from shame! u hated that it's Sunghoon who caught u all the time and u weren't sure that u'd be able to look at him the next day but u managed to do that somehow. The table went silent again until Heeseung spoke again "i was just asking cuz it was too cold yesterday and the heating system wasn't working for me so i went to ask u if it works for u but u wasn't in ur room"

"Ahh yes" u lied "i was probably in the kitchen i got so thirsty and i didn't bring water to my room before sleeping" u mumbled, ur words beating u making Sunghoon laugh again impressed by ur ability to lie that fast. Heeseung and Jay were grinning knowingly, Joy didn't seem to understand the whole situation but she shrugged continuing what she was doing on her phone. U finished eating not daring to lift ur head again rushing to clean the table and do the dishes and u almost tripped, ur legs still sore from earlier if it wasn't for Sunghoon who catched u his hands around your waist holding you close, he chuckled his lips next to your ear his hot breath tickling you "are u still thirsty?" he whispered making u push him away chewing on ur lips, he chuckled again "just kidding watch out ur steps" he said tickling ur chin and leaving, making u freeze on ur spot questioning wtf was that about before walking out to the kitchen.

Jay followed u the thought of u doing the dishes while obviously looking tired not clicking with him, he insisted to do them instead asking u to have a rest in ur room, u sighed defeated and went back to the living room not wanting to spend ur time alone knowing that u'll just gonna be having unnecessary thoughts so u hopped on the couch laying there next to Joy who was watching some random insta reels and she smiled creating more space for you "what are u watching?" u asked her softly, Joy positioned her phone to match it with ur sight "just some reels" and u nodded watching videos with her while talking about some random stuff, u sighed the mic on ur back making u uncomfortable, "u should sit in the middle" Joy suggested but u shook your head "it's fine" you replied and Joy frowned not satisfied but she didn't say anything.

After some minutes Sunghoon walked to the living room sitting accross from you, his eyes not leaving ur body and u tried not to meet his gaze, his stare was so intense and intimidating and u wished he ignored u like earlier, "y/n" he called your name and ur heart skipped a beat it was probably the first time u heard ur name skip his lips, Joy looked at him raising her eyebrow but watching ur interaction quietly "yes?" u answered voice almost unheard and Sunghoon smiled, he loves when ur all shy and awkward with him, he cleared his throat before speaking "u wanna go on a date with me?" he asked u making ur eyes widen u certainly was not expecting this from him especially and u were wondering for a second if u've heard him correctly "uh?" u managed to let out and Joy couldn't stop herself from giggling next to you, Sunghoon didn't lose his charming smile making ur insides melt not even bothering to repeat his question, u looked at Joy for help, this situation almost awkward, she was smiling at you encouraging you to give him an answer, "umm... sure" u said after some moments, Sunghoon was waiting patiently and he seemed happy with your reply and Joy clapped her hands excitedly "great then it's settled" she said and u could feel yourself drowning, not knowing what to do and what to expect ur face as red as Joy's phone case ur eyes still looking at Sunghoon who didn't drop his smile now smirking at u, his eyes so intense making u question ur respond "i hope i don't regret that" u mumbled only for u to hear.

This part has been sitting in my drafts for a long time sorry :( but yeah this was not how i wrote this part originally nd it really sucks that i didn't save it but yeah hope u enjoy ^^ the next part is gonna be super intense, spoiler: it'll be both Sunghoon and Heeseung focused and oh god this duo is a lot!

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aethersgirlfriend · 4 months

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we need more fresh-out-of-the-pit aurora. i see so much newly summoned phantom and about how he's left out and confused and just wants to please his packmates and like YES absolutely but what about rory?!?!??! (under the cut because i went on a tangent)

first of all - her summon !!

phantom and aurora being bonded summon buddies means everything to me so yes they got summoned together in the same circle no i won't take criticism yes they're in love in every way possible

rory refuses to look at anyone but phantom for the first few days, no one can even get a good look at her face. the girls take her on the tour of their part of the den and all that but she looks at the ground the whole time and escapes to her room until phantom is done getting the tour and they hide together. she only wears his clothes (aka swiss' old clothes but she doesn't know that yet) for ages and they'll venture out together to get food and maybe explore their new environment a bit but apart from that you don't see them.

but then how about a bit after her summon when she gets more used to things? what about her being so tiny? in the pit it had its positives but topside? she's still getting used to everything being so big. she has no concept of fashion or hair or makeup so when she sees cumulus and her beautiful white curls she decides i want to do that! and lus ends up having to brush out all the knots she made for an hour. or how about this - she's absolutely TERRIFIED of the older ghouls. aether and omega? she is kind of used to. zeyphr? not yet. alpha? absolutely not. after only knowing of her own small multi ghoul size and her pale pink complexion her whole life in the pit, how do u expect her to react to the massive, grey skinned fire ghoul? that's a trick question, she won't deal with him. she disappears into thin air (she's half air ghoul!!!!) everytime she sees him.

but that's just the silly stuff, what about the angst???

seeing how close cirrus and cumulus are and desperately wanting to impress them, but overdoing it and embarassing herself so she doesn't talk to anyone but phantom for a week and the girls are so upset that she's back to square one?

or during that week - not being able to talk to phantom as much as she's like because aether has him practicing so much and she's still slightly intimidated by the older ghoul so she doesnt wanna annoy him by stealing away his student so she seeks out mist - the solitary ghoulette who only really hangs out by the shore occasionally - but mist wasn't even aware there was a new ghoulette so she freaks out at the sight of rory and rorys left all alone with no clue how to make friends

or her returning back to the abbey hours later when everyone was stressing about where the fuck the tiny ghoulette disappeared to and turns out she got lost in the forest trying to find flowers for the girls as an apology because she saw mountain give them bouquets and she's covered in scratches and mud and bug bites and her hair is full of leaves and sticks and she's sobbing her eyes out and phantom runs over to her and won't let anyone near her for the whole evening and snaps at anyone who comes too close

but eventually aether gets them both to calm down and the girls bring aurora into their part of the den and clean her off (with phantom there watching over her the whole time because he's not that calm yet) and tell her she doesn't have to impress them and put cream on all her bites and braid her hair and tell her how pretty she is and how they're so happy she's here and eventually swiss pulls phantom away to talk to him about not trying to murder his packmates over aurora because none of them are going to hurt her (phantom saw aurora being upset because she got lost looking for stuff for the girls and immediately thought they did it on purpose) and when he leaves the girls make a big pile of pillows and blankets and lay her down and let her get all her feelings out

and she's on her side and cirrus is at her back and cumulus at her front and sunny at her feet and they're all whispering sweet nothings to her as she cries silently at how comforting it all feels and falls asleep to lus humming a tune and wakes up and the whole pack sit down in the morning to talk it all through 💕💕💕💕

oh yes and she definitely saw cirrus eating salad one day and then mountain took her to the flower field just beyond the greenhouse and turned away for 2 seconds and she started trying to eat all the flowers because she thought that's what cirrus' salad was made out of

#aurora ghoulette #aurora ghost #phantom ghoul #phantom ghost #nameless ghoulettes #ghost ghoulettes #ghoul headcanons #ghost bc #first time posting a long headcanon I'm scared

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vigilanteshtagain · 5 months

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HEADCANONS BECAUSE I'M BORED

GOJO

- Uses Instagram the way Millennials do (the first and seconds year's get second hand embarrassment)

- Drives like a maniac. Yaga has explicitly forbidden him to drive students around

- NEVER washes his blindfold, and if anyone suggests he should wash it he will get offended

- Cooks very well but settles for takes outs and fancy dinners with his students because he HATES to eat alone and has no one to share his food with back home, makes him even lonelier

- HAS to smell good ALL the time, and has a collection of different colognes, each one for specific ocassions

- Enjoyed taking Megumi to the park and playing with him, and wishes he wouldn't have grown up so fast

- Made hand crafted albums of every single little thing Megumi and Tsumiki have done, bad portraits of him and all

- Kissed sucked Geto's toes at some point, I'm not sorry

- Nevers answers the phone, much to Yaga's annoyance

- His heart warms up whenever his students bring him little gifts, like sweet pastries

- Defends his students with his LIFE, but this is canon already

- Is an ugly crier, like really bad. He yells when he cries. Shoko just stays there giving him the foulest glare.

GETO

- Refuses to cut his hair, no matter how many times Mimiko and Nanako have complained about finding long hairs plastered on the shower walls

- Keeps photos of his time in Jujutsu High in a box, and looks at them on lonely nights (specially photos of Gojo and him SHUT UP THIS IS CANON TO ME)

- Is allergic to nuts

- Has considered getting Mimiko and Nanako a pet, maybe a dog or a cat (I see them more as cats people)

- Definitely drew Gojo's eyes in the middle of class, multiple times because he couldn't get the colors "right"

- Is a tea person

- Sleeps like a victorian child on their deathbed, he's way too dramatic

- Tax evader

NANAMI

- Shops EXCLUSIVELY in brand stores. Dior, Channel, Gucci, you name it.

- Owns an air frier, uses it to it's maximum capacity. As soon as he got one, pots, pans and stoves doesn't exist to him anymore (I don't even know why I included this)

- Is in desperate need of a pet, this man needs some love and comfort in his life but his job as a sorcerer makes it difficult to have one

- Doesn't actually hate Gojo, he just gets heavily annoyed by him. After all, Gojo and Shoko are the only "close" classmates he has left.

- Pets stray dogs and cats on the streets and feeds them whenever he has time

- Actually likes that horrendous tie

- Knows how to play an air instrument, not sure which one but definitely knows how to play at least one

NOBARA

- Follows every beauty and fashion influencer, her for you page is flooded with that

- She's a Tini fan no doubt, La Triple T on repeat for days

- Can't dance to save her life

- Shows her affection through quality time

- Certified Barb along with Yuji, Nicki Minaj's biggest fans. Megumi acts like he doesn't care but he is just as Barb as they are.

- Her cf on Instagram is basically her day to day with the idiots she calls classmates (She likes to document them to have memories for the future)

- Actually very good at math, despite her not liking numbers.

- Gets road rage even if she's not the one driving

- Got Megumi into skincare

- The first one to propose a movie night between the first and second year's, she likes when all of them hang out

- She's the type to create a group chat to plan a birthday party for her friends and organizes everything

- Has a free pass to everyone's dorm, like she sees the door open and enters just to hang out, SHE DOESN'T CARE

- She enjoys training with the second years, specially Maki (NOBAMAKI FOR THE WIN)

- She gives practical gifts

- Gets way too much into TikTok drama, it's the only thing she'll talk about for days and it's overwhelming

YUJI

- Had a dog when he was little, probably named it something cheesy

- Likes reggaeton, in love with Karol G (a ver, quién no?), Jennifer Lawrence who

- Sunset pictures fill up his camera roll

- Doesn't like needles, still gets nervous when he get shots or vaccines

- He does this thing where he chews really fast whenever the food it's too hot to eat instead of letting it cool down. I don't know how to explain it but it's painful to watch, Megumi and Nobara smacks him on the head for that

- Definitely the type to bake a cake for his friend's birthdays, he bakes it with so much love I'm crying

- Gets his feelings hurt rather easily but he is quick to forgive

- Knows every single trending celebrity gossip and talks about it with Nobara and Megumi

- A KING at dancing, he can dance pretty much anything

- He gives very well thought gifts, like he really puts effort and pay attention to what his friends like

- He calls Nanami just to see how he is doing, needless to say Nanami is deeply touched by this

- Snores so bad Sukuna thought he was going to choke the first nights after Yuji ate the finger, now it's just background noise for him

MEGUMI

- Cuddles with his shikigamis on cold nights, and takes his demon dogs on walks

- He's very reliable, the first one out of his friends to find solutions to a problem

- SMART, but this is already canon

- Taught his demon dogs to steal and hide Gojo's clothes just to mess with him, he's a MENACE

- CAN'T TAKE A JOKE, he doesn't understand TikTok references it's so annoying.

- He looks like he's mad all the time when he's out, so bad sometimes people glare at him unprovoked

- The type to say no whenever someone asks him to do something but ends up doing it anyway

- Has thought about getting a tattoo related to his shikigamis in the future, but he's not really sure if he's going to get it done (Probably his demon dogs mark or Mahoraga's wheel because God he thinks about summoning it first thing in the morning, "With this treasure I summon" in italics tattooed on his forearm)

- Neat freak, NEEDS to have his room clean and organized at all times (if he doesn't, that will be his last straw and will summon Mahoraga)

- Gives well thought gifts, but plays it off and says it's nothing

- Bad grammar makes him wince, needless to say he has perfect grammar. His essays are perfect.

- He was that annoying child that corrected everyone whenever they said something wrong, like "Um, actually you're wrong because-", UGH. He's still like that but now he just throws a nasty glare and corrects them.

- His love language is acts of service but quality time is also important to him (despite how he pretends to hate hanging out with Yuji and Nobara)

- A very decent driver, Gojo taught him despite how he drives like a beast

___________________________________________

Sorry this was too long, but one thing led to another. Jjk brain rot is consuming me.

#i should be studying for my midterms #jjk brain rot #jujutsu kaisen #gojo satoru #nanami kento #satosugu #nobamaki #geto suguru #megumi fushiguro #nobara kugisaki #yuji itadori #jjk gojo #sukuna #maki zenin

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37-drc89 · 4 months

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take yourself home; han jisung

chapter I.

trope: teenager love

warnings for this part: cursing, family problems, mention of vomiting and sex, underage drinking (don’t!!!)

reader is referred to in female pronouns.

word count: 5k.

part II hopefully coming soon.

note: part two is expected if this one goes good! i'll appreciate any feedback, reblogs and comments <3 also, english is not my first language so i apologize for any typos or grammar mistakes! x

masterlist

House parties were never exactly your thing.

The whole concept just never seemed appealing nor any interesting to you. Screaming, drunk people bumping into each other at every step, floor sticky from all the spilled drinks, air thick as poisoned with sweat and alcohol and loud music blasting out from the speakers so noisy you can feel your heart shaking in your chest. It’s barely possible to move an inch without causing any unwanted contact with strangers or witnessing someone vomit outside the window. Everything just making you feel dirty like you were pushed into a pigsty surrounded by no humans but animals, alcohol effectively robbing people of any manners and awareness of personal space. Some people you saw two times at most, probably in your school hall, trying to bring you on the said "dance floor", only murmuring about how boring you are when you decline. This was always enough to make you end up on the couch, lazily sipping on your drink and cringing while watching people’s animalistic behaviour. Or, if you were lucky enough to push through the crowd, find your place at the balcony and finally getting taste of anything else than the disgusting odour filling up the house. That’s why you’ve always desperately tried to stay away from partying, if you could even name it that way.

Fortunately or unfortunately, one Saturday you ran out of excuses you would usually throw at your nagging school seatmate and they succeeded to drag you to a house party that Chan organised. Chan is popular, like, a lot. How could he not? He attended last grade which already was enough for some girls, desiring for an older boy. What’s more, he was extremely respectful towards everyone, very well known for treating women right and fitting perfectly into every group with his witty personality. Everything he touched, he ended up succeding in, both sports and school - always more than happy to help everyone who needs it. Not to mention his unnecessarily attractive appearance, muscles poking out of fitted shirts, skin glowy, smile so bright it could blind everyone passing by him in school. Perfect, perfect man. You like him as well, of course, positive that it’s really impossible not to. However, no matter how much you liked and admired Chan, you despised parties. You weren't even sure whether he knew about your attendance as he just let your seatmate bring a partner with him. You were whining, complaining and being annoying, anything just to get out of this unfortunate situation. But as it suprisingly turned out, this was the very first time you did not regret going. Because this was the first time you got to meet Han Jisung.

Back off, maybe not the very first time. You’ve seen him a couple of times in the hall, clinging onto Chan’s side, always more than happy to keep him company on his way home or goof around in the library. But in the hall he never really stood out, just mixing with any other students. Maybe a little bit noisier than others; it was a challenge not to overhear his laugh spreading across the floor.

But this was the first time you actually noticed Jisung.

The party itself started just as shitty as you imagined it to be. When you and your seatmate arrived at Chan's place it was already completely stuffed with people that were spilling out on the backyard. As soon as you stepped your foot in the house, blasting out music shot into your ears like a nightmare and you immediately knew you can forget about properly communicating with anyone. Few glances are thrown in your direction before everyone came back to their tasks as they realized it's just you. Not paying too much attention to it, you just informed your friend you'll be on the couch, though it seemed like she was already too caught up in some heated conversation with random kids from school. Sneakily, you grabbed a beer from the counter and plopped down on your usual spot. Maybe gaslighting yourself into thinking this party will be different than any other was an absolute shit idea. How long should you stay so you don't come out as rude or boring? Two hours? That would be solid two hours taken away from your life without any use, though. An hour? Maybe that's too short and wasn't even worth going all the way here.

Your eyes observed as people kept coming, occupying every possible corner of the room and with that, making you lose sight in anything. All your eyes could reach was dancing figures, occasionally bumping into your legs, making you feel trapped in your little space.

That doesn't make any sense.

You pulled up from the couch, barely making it outside of the room. You held your drink up, careful so none of it gets on your tshirt. But in the end, some of it ended spilling down your arm, anyway. Your body pressed itself onto the door frame, taking as little space as possible and you took a look around, searching for a way out. Gaze stopped at the stairs leading to second floor and it seemed like no one has occupied it yet as the lights were off. You squeezed shoulders to your body and quickly sneaked between the crowd of sweaty bodies. Every touch and rub left on your body a burning feeling like someone just smeared it with acid, your face scrunching in disgust, just wanting it to be over as quickly as possible. Finally making it to the stairs, you released a breath you were holding, shoulders going slump as you made your way upstairs. You left the light off, not wanting to draw any unwanted attention to your actions. Blindfolded, you try to find any doors with touch only and when your fingers finally met a handle you pushed the doors open with no hasitation. Some might think its nosy to walk around someone's house like this, but sooner or later, you know someone will be fucking in one of those beds, anyway.

Supposingly, the room you ended up in was a bedroom, moonlight shining through huge windows decorating the area in a delicate silver glow, exposing it's silhouette just slightly. Using your poor vision you walked past huge bed, ignoring the strong urge to just jump onto it and let in sink you in until morning comes, when everyone is gone. You could've sworn there was something yelling to you, ushing you onto the matress, already making your eyelids heavy on your eyes. It all made up kind of comforting atmosphere, muffled music coming from downstairs, only floor shaking lightly with every bass and you almost could feel it in your guts. Hundreds of conversations were going on just below you, but they all mixed in one, composing a steady hum.

You found your place on the floor, back pressing against the bed, knees bent under your chin. Facing the big balcony door, your eyes observed blinking city lights and traced small cars passing by the streets, just to disappear mere seconds later. You could feel your body sinking slowly into the pitch black as your eyelids started to give in under their weight. It took only two minutes for them to close completely, weight now resting on your head, so you hide in your arms, forming a ball of yourself. Mind focused only on sounds coming from the party, though they started getting quieter with every second, your ears losing track on the screams and laughs. Peace overtook your previously restless body, leaving you all to yourself.

All you saw was the city. You saw the last joyful day you remembered, from summer few years ago. Your father was back to your country at that time, just to get some time with his loved ones for once. Your mother was holding a camera in her free hand, taking pictures of her sweet child, of her treasure, of you. You were wearing your favourite yellow dress that day, decorated with designs of plenty different flowers. You named them all, in honour of the dress being your absolute favourite. Hair loose, long back then, falling on your shoulders and back, on top of your head rests a cute hat you declined to take off, even if it was already evening. Wind was blowing slightly on your young face, making you laugh squeakily.

Your father hands you your favourite ice cream, caramel flavoured. The ice cream he promised you as your birthday dessert, a gift, so simple yet it made you happier than you've ever been. Being ten is no joke, he once said, when admiring his only child, suprised about how much you've grown when he was abroad. Each time he visited your hometown he made sure to measure your height, giving you a present every time, for growing so strong and tall.

Your mother holds your birthday present out of your sight, patiently waiting for you to finish your dessert. You, being the curious and impatient child, gulped it down almost immediately in urge to open your gift. She only laughs at your determination before handing it to you. When you eagerly try to pull the ribbons off the box, your parents send each other a fond smile. Excitement in your eyes slowly starts turning into irritation as the ribbons seem unable to untie, no matter how hard you pull them. Your muscles tense, making your hands shake in your useless attempts. Just when your eyes start welling up with angry tears and you raise your head to seek any help from your parents, your voice hitches in your throat, seeing no one is sitting by your side anymore. You blink, and blink, and blink, trying to get your vision back, but everytime your eyes open, everything around gets even more blurry. You try to call for help, to shout for your mommy and daddy, but the only thing coming out of you are hurtful whimpers.

Your father is far gone now. One day when he left the country after joyful holidays with your family, he never showed up again. You and your mother were waiting on the airport since morning that day, only to come back home with flowers almost dried out and cake completely melted from waiting in the sun. After that day, you can't even remember when was the last time you saw your mother's smile, now a stone-like expression glued to her face permanently. That was the first birthday you didn't get your ice cream treat. Now your favourite flavour has changed, you can't stand caramel anymore. Now your hair is much shorter, as no one is there to braid it for you. Now your favourite yellow dress is somewhere in the basement, dirty and dusty, probably not even looking any similar to yellow anymore. Now your birthday is the worst day of the year.

Your body jolted up almost entirely off the foor, horrified gasp leaving your mouth, followed by unsteady, heavy breathing in any attempt to catch any air in your lungs. You can feel your body trembling under the weight of your nightmare, but you don't cry. You don't cry because there's no use of crying. Nothing will change no matter how many tears leave your eyes. That's all you've learnt for past six years.

"You okay?"

You jumped slightly in place and turned around to see the source of somehow similar voice coming from right behind you. Your gaze lands on a silhouette sitting on the bed, gently hovering over your shaking body. You squint your eyes but can't catch a glimpse of the stranger's face. Voice deep and familiar, you seek through your brain to recall it's owner, but the canvas stay blank.

"I get them too."

"Huh?"

"Nightmares. I get them too."

He plumps his body down onto the floor, keeping a safe distance between the two of you. However, the position helped you take a closer look at his face. Moonlight now slightly shining its glow into the round cheeks, big eyes, and barely visible smile plastered on Han Jisung's face. He gifts you with an understanding look, as if he was trying to bluetooth some comfort into you. You only shake your head, brushing it away.

“It wasn’t a nightmare.”

“That must’ve been a solid dream then, you were turning and tossing in your sleep like crazy,” Jisung nods his head slowly, eyes fixated somewhere far away, outside the window, “What was it about?”

You shot him an annoyed look, brows knitted together.

“A rollercoaster ride.”

“That’s fireee…” he sounds genuinely impressed, and you seek for anything in his face that could tell you if he’s being fucking for real. “I’ve never been on rollercoaster. Unless we’re including the emotional ones.”

Jisung chuckles audibly to himself but quickly tone it down after noticing your dead silence. His eyes look back from your face to some random spot outside. “Were your parents in this dream?”

Spit stills in your throat at his question but you refuse to turn your head towards his. You slowly let air leave your nostrils in tensed huff.

“Why?”

“You talk in your sleep. You didn’t know?”

“I didn’t.”

Your empty response signaled Jisung not to continue on the topic, so he only nods and points at half-empty beer bottle settled down by your hip.

“You shouldn’t be drinking, you’re sixteen, no?”

“I can smell wine from like three miles away from you, Mr. Policeman.” you returned, earning a quiet laugh from him, throwing his head back gently.

“Guilty.”

Incredibly awkward conversation. Incredibly awkward and simple but easier than any random chat with your seatmate, or Chan, or anyone else you got to talk to, ever. Jisung’s aura felt warm, familiar, slowly inching its way towards you and embracing your body. Something about it made it seem like you don’t have to be extra or put any much effort to talk to Jisung. He wasn’t really expecting you to talk to him, either. It’s not like he was unfamiliar with people ignoring his poor attempts of making a conversation. But you didn’t run away from him, like anyone else would. You sat there, with him, when you could've just brush it off.

“And why are you here?” you quirked an eyebrow at him, expecting Jisung to be glued to Chan like he always did.

“I’m not a fan of crowded spaces. They make me feel like I'm in chokehold.”

Jisung’s response take you aback a bit, your eyes blinking few times at him in surprise. You’re positive that everyone who at least heard of Han Jisung once in their life would associate him with need of constant attention, being in centre of a crowd. His personality is so bubbly and bright it could easily outshine everyone in the room. You supposed his loudness was intentional, to pull people towards him.

“Are you sure you’re the Han Jisung I walk by in school everyday? The one who won a competition in taking shots just to get some stupid title among those losers?”

“Sometimes you gotta take a step back and stay in the crowd so someone else can be the best. I can’t be a winner every time, I'm basically doing them a favor.” Jisung laughed at his own words again in obvious attempt to brush the topic away. So you let it go, getting up from the floor with slight struggle caused by your previous position that made your legs sore. You opened the balcony door and stepped outside, cold breeze welcoming your poorly dressed body. Jisung followed you out like a puppy, leaning on the railing just beside you. Current location allowed both of you to observe the wildlife going on below you, in the backyard. Beer pong, truth or dare, even a whole ass concert performed by a group of drunk girls. It all created a disgusting mess.

“They look possessed.” you commented, internally very happy you actually have a person you could complain to, knowing your boring and judgemental attitude won’t push Jisung away.

Dead silence creeped in for good two minutes.

“Maybe that’s what normal teenagers do?” he murmured into his palm, not looking at you, “Maybe they’re ordinary people and we are the weird ones?“

You sent him a pitiful look, genuinely amused by the fact that he dared to compare you to them.

"You want to be like them?"

"Sometimes it seems easier, no?"

You raise an eyebrow at Jisung.

"To be ordinary, I mean. Do you ever wonder how does it feel not to get those glances? Or not to be judged? You're just a part of the crowd wherever you go because you fit in. With everyone. Doesn't that sound cool?" He tilts his head at you, however, you notice he avoids eye contact, staring at some random spot on your cheek. It's obvious this topic bothered Jisung’s mind for a while, many thoughts spinning between his gaze, but you can't decode any of them.

You take a minute to analyze every light reflecting in his pupils.

"No, I don't think so. You won't find your spark in the crowd, not when it's constantly hiding between others," Jisung remained silent, but this time his eyes met yours, a sign that he's listening. "But once you find it, right people will come to you themselves."

"How do I recognize them? The right people?"

"You just do." Your body turns towards his entirely.

"Don't look for yourself in others, Jisung. You'll spend your entire life being lost. And by the time you wake up, your life will be coming to it's end."

"Are you happy with your life?"

"You ask too many questions, has anyone ever told you that?" Your eyes roll, but Jisung doesn't take his off you, visibly waiting for your response. You sigh. "Someday I will be. We both will be."

You never showed up at any house party again. But neither did Jisung.

That night you felt heard for the first time in six years, even though you didn’t have much to say. Jisung seemed to understand what remained unspoken, knowing the right time will eventually come, someday. Some sort of invisible string connected you and him, pulling you to each other whenever there was no one else to be there for you. And you never complained, Jisung may say odd and stupid things at most times, but that might be the part of you that you needed, the one where perspective on life is a bit gentler. Jisung noticed the rough shell you put around yourself throughout the years and started off with brushing its spikey surface, hoping one day he'll crack it open, for you.

And he feels the same. Having a genuine friend was an unfamiliar experience for Jisung. Whenever his eyes land on you he swear he feels like his body is freed, even if it's only for a few moments. Like tight ropes loosened on his body, softening the grip so he can expose another part of himself to you. You never laugh, you never make fun, never judge. Sometimes you don't even say anything but he knows it's equivalent to I accept you. And he feels accepted. Like he finally found a shelter that would protect him from a storm, no matter if it's only for now, Jisung knows he's safe with you.

-----

Shoot.

A noise spreads through quiet, pitch black room, then it goes silent again. You shift in your bed, face scrunched in focus not to get discracted by it so your current progress in falling asleep doesn't go to waste. Legs pulled up tightly against your chest, completely wrapped up in the covers, finally giving your muscles some proper rest they've been yearning for. A minute passes.

Shoot. Shoot.

You pull the blanket above your head. It doesn't take too long for your lungs to beg for some fresh air, but you stay covered up from head to toes, relishing in silence so loud you could feel blood flowing in your ears. However realisation hits quickly and you know it won't work without suffocating yourself to death, so you let just the tip of your nose outside through a small hole, breathing in some cool air.

Shoot.

What the fucking hell.

You sit up angrily, irritated groan coming out of your throat as you pull youself up and seach for the source of the noise that disturbed your only almost succesful attempt to sleep. You furiously look around the room, listening carefully for any hints.

Shoot.

Your body turns itself towards the window in a hearbeat, ready to murder the doer. Swinging it open, your eyes land on not anyone else than Han Jisung, standing just below your window with the stupidest grin on his face, already waving to you.

"Oh jesus fuck." you're already disappearing inside again when another muffled thud reaches your window in attempt to stop you, along with Jisung's quiet "Hey, hey, hey!" being heard outside. You swing your head down once again. "You have 30 second to explain yourself or I'm never talking to you again."

Because what exactly is happening right by your window is Han Jisung standing by his bike tossed in the grass, with very poorly looking muffin in his hands, a single light up cangle stuck in the middle. It glows the smallest shine on his face covered in the darkness, allowing you to see the silhouette of his smile so wide it almost gave you a cheek ache just by looking at it.

"How long does it take for you to wake up, god," he drops his head for a second, shaking it, before looking up at you once again, searching for your face in the night. "Dumbass even forgot it's her birthday today."

Yeah, your birthday.

Of course you didn't forget. It was the very first time in good 3 months you went to sleep before midnight, purposely, just to avoid this horrible day appearing on the callendar, again. This time you were falling asleep praying to heaven to let you sleep through today and wake up when it's over. Not to add that this year specifically meant less than ever to you as you were turning eighteen, suddenly everything reminding you about how a grown up woman can't gather her life together, not in the slightest.

Apparently, Han Jisung was born to ruin your plans.

"It's a little bit cold down here so if you don't mind getting your ass over here and bringing me some jacket, that would be fantastic." Jisung gets you back to earth and you only throw him an angry scoff, disappearing in your room for no longer than 2 minutes before jumping carefully out the window and closing it as quietly as possible, not to wake up your sleeping mother that would probably slip into a coma if she witnessed you sneaking out. With a boy especially. You face him with your brows furrowed in annoyance and he gestures you to blow the candle that already was dripping down the muffin. Your eyes roll.

"Happy birthday, y/n."

"You're insufferable. I wish myself a better friend next year," you blow the candle in one puff and hand Jisung your jacket he already claimed as his due to the numerous amount of times he borrowed it from you.

"You know damn well no one else would befriend you," he chuckles and hides the candle in his pocket.

As you walk past him you can't help the corners of your lips forming in the tiniest grin. No matter how much you despised your birthday and celebrating it, if you could even call it this way, your chest felt warmer knowing that there's someone in this world that doesn't hate it as much as you do. Just like last year, Jisung is the only one to remember. Who else if not him? Your mother practically crossed out this date out of her life, your father never called, beside that no one else has ever asked. A year ago you were so sure by your eighteenth birthday he will be gone, either by getting some new, fancier company or simply growing out of you. Yet here he is, standing by your window at midnight, still the same way he was a year ago. He really hasn't changed at all.

You ended up sitting on a cold kerbstone by already closed store and its parking lot, completely empty and quiet like it's never been. Knees hugged to your chests, jackets wrapped around your bodies tightly. Silence maintenances between you and Jisung, but it's not uncomfortable, quite the opposite, actually. You share occasional glances at each other while swaying back and forth. Eventually your eyes land at the cake lookalike he placed between your bodies and you examine its messiness. The frosting clearly not mixed well, spilled on top of the muffin as if Jisung was in a hurry and some old, probably expired colorful sprinkles on top of it all. Somehow you found it pretty. Yes, it looked like a total disaster, but picturing Jisung tries and effort he put in it made it look better in your eyes.

"Shall we taste the masterpiece?" he grinned, catching you staring at the cake. You nodded and he proceeded to clumsily part the muffin in two pieces.

"One, two, three..." Jisung counts and both of you bite in. You chew, feeling occasional crunches here and there, sprinkles rock hard between your teeth. He observes you carefully, searching for your reactions as you take your time swallowing it.

"It's pretty bad," you comment after a while, shaking crumbs off your hands. Jisung whines, hiding his head between his knees.

"I know! I suck at baking. I should've just buy it-"

"But I like it."

Jisung's head shoot up and he's looking at you, startled. The muffin is still filling up his cheeks that create two perfect globes decorating his face. You giggle to yourself.

Silence. Jisung continued to chew on the food, quietly, eyes glued to his feet. Yours remain on your hands. You clench and unclench them, observing nail prints on your skin disappear everytime you stick them inside it. Your bottom lip is stuck between your teeth, now all red and swollen.

Weird feeling built up inside of your guts. You don't exactly feel... older. It just feels like everything suddenly started to matter. Everything you did and everything you did not do. You try searching for any other emotion in yourself, but the only one left is guilt.

"I don't want to grow up, Jisung."

He doesn't look up this time, lips forming in a tight line.

"I know. I don't want to, either."

Jisung rests his arms on his knees, laying his head on them, turned in your direction. You mirrored slowly, gaze meeting his. You blinked at each other, not any particular emotion written on any of your faces. You scanned his, tracing every curve of it with your eyes, stopping by every mole and scar. He's so far from what he used to be. His nose and jawline much more visible, his hair grown, just an inch, but it did. Looking at him now, you see he matured. A lot. And it's amazing how you've watched him grow out of this stupid, irresponsible boy he used to be. But you know this boy is still hiding inside of him, in the deepest corners, Jisung effectively trying to suppress him. Sometimes, you just wish he would let him out. Just to go back.

"Have you ever thought of running away from here?” you blurted out suddenly and you swear you could see Jisung’s breathing stop, response building up inside him, carefully thinking about his next words.

“I have, I even tried. But I guess I’m afraid to go. Or maybe I’m afraid of being left all to myself,” he answers slowly, sigh leaving his lips right after.

“Wouldn’t that be great? I mean, aren’t you tired of the city? Of people, your family, sometimes even of yourself,” he blinks at you silently before turning his head, looking at the lantern ahead of you, and you do the same. “Because I feel stuck here.”

“That was the reason I ran away. I felt like I wouldn’t move on if I stayed here. I think I was searching for something to look forward to.”

It really seemed like Jisung spoke words for you.

You move closer to him, pressing your side onto his. Your head finds its place on his shoulder and he doesn't tense up or move away. Jisung melts into the position, like his shoulder was designated for you to lean on. His lips press to your hair and sigh leaves them.

"Did it work?" You ask and he shakes his head no, lips formed in a line once again. Your tongue pokes inside of your cheek. "Would it work if we went together?"

Jisung looks at you, question written on his face and you push yourself off his shoulder, locking your eyes. The words left your mouth so easily Jisung couldn't find any hesitation or joke in your face. "I don't know."

"Imagine this. We could be wherever we want, doing whatever we want. No one would know us. Maybe we could... find something. To keep us going. I don't know."

"What about our families?"

"Do you really think any of them would bat an eye?"

Jisung goes silent. He is silent because you're right. As far as he remembers, he was no one's special concern. He never thought about whether it's work's fault or just lack of love, but it separated his family members effectively throughout the years. That was the main reason he has spent past years in your company - both of you could sneak out, stay up late, skip school. Freedom, some might say. But honestly, never in two years he saw pure happiness in your eyes. And neither you did in his. You really are the only thing Jisung has left. He treasures you more than himself and the night you met, he promised himself to let you experience life once again.

So fuck it.

"Okay. Let's do this."

Your eyebrows furrow suspiciously, scanning his face features, looking for any signs of joke. You go quiet for a minute, expecting him to break his character, saying you lost your mind and that he's not going anywhere. But that doesn't happen.

"Wait, really?"

"Mhm. Consider it your birthday present, I guess."

#skz #stray kids #skz au #stray kids fanfic #skz angst #stray kids x reader #han jisung #skz jisung #han x reader #han jisung x reader #han jisung fluff #han jisung stray kids #han x you #skz imagines #stray kids scenarios

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dckweed · 11 months

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Can you write a fic about Hangman and his friend from childhood and when she found out she was pregenat, her (former) bf broke up with her? You can make it as angsty or fluffy as you want.

TIA

absolutely love this! i had a couple of ideas and i hope you love the one that i landed on for this prompt! again guys, feel free to send in more, i love new ideas! this is honestly alot longer than i anticipated it to be and im so so so sorry but i got so wrapped up in it for some reason but hi how are you? also, would we want a part two to this maybe? make Jake and Babygirl a series? idk man i could vibe with it. anyway, comment, reblog, send in asks <3

warnings: angst, fluff, mentions of pregnancy, mentions of abortion and guilt and shame.

disclaimer: I did not add in abortion to make a stance on pro choice, nor did i add it in to make a stand off to pro lifers. Please do not bring the matter of pro choice or pro life into my comments or you will be blocked from my blog. This is a topic that makes me incredibly angry as a woman, abortion may not be something thats for you or that you'll ever find yourself doing, but that doesn't mean that its not an option for other people. Not every person will make the same choices as you, can we please remember and respect that? Everyone has a different stance on this topic and that is okay, but theres no need to argue.

part two

'YOU'RE NOT ALONE, OKAY?' jake seresin.

When Jake had called you last week, he had heard it in your voice immediately, even though you tried so desperately to hide it. The sadness, the fear. Before you had even finished telling him how much you missed him, he had cut you off with a: "What's wrong, babygirl?" Babygirl. He had called you that from the day he'd met you, and it had annoyed you greatly at first but over time it came to be second nature to respond to it and you had stopped rolling your eyes after a year or so. You and Jake had been stuck together like peanut butter and jelly from your very first day together. You were 13 when you had first moved into his hometown, your family had bought the ranch right next to his and his mama had made her happy way over to come say hello, a grumpy and annoyed Jake in tow.

You often laughed at the memory, Jake had come off as he usually did, ego-fueled and jackassy, though you later learned that it was just a front to survive in his big family of all boys, where he just happened to be the youngest and treated like the baby. You had even called him a jackass on that day, and he quickly followed it up. "Babygirl, has anyone ever told you that you're a brat?" Even at 13 he had the playboy names that he'd learned from watching his older brothers. He was appalled that you swung your arm back and popped him one right on the cheek, leaving his eye black for the next two weeks. He was enamored by you immediately and from that moment on was by your side every waking moment of the day.

Relationships had come and gone for both of you, both of you having your hearts broken more than once and seeking the other out for comfort, there had been many a night spent on one of the others living room couch with fuzzy blankets and cake while one of you cried. You and Jake were so bonded that most of your partners took it threateningly, girls he liked enough to bring around his family (including you) took offensively to you almost immediately, and your boyfriends took his presence in your life personally, and this time? Well, this time was no exception.

"..you still there?" You sobbed out a terrible cry that had him sitting up straight on his couch. You felt terrible immediately and tried to reel it all back in, you were calling to congratulate him on the permanent placement after the uranium mission, all of which you had heard details about every single night. "Y/N, what happened?"

"Jake..he left me.." You cry, trying not to snot all over yourself as you looked down at your bathroom counter, panic flooding your tone. It had been two weeks since he'd been gone, and you had been fine because you knew you didn't need him, but you were scared now. Scared for your future, scared to tell Jake about the two positive lines on the two pregnancy tests sitting on your sink, because what if he left you too? "I dont even remember what it was over," Him, always him. "but it just hurts so fucking bad because it's like two fucking years of my life wasted on this goddamn asshole and he went and..just..left."

He had left. Had taken every single one of the things he had kept at your home, and had even gone as far as blocking your number, all because you said you had wanted to go take a trip to see your best friend Jake when he was finished with his detachment, even though you had just seen him two months before. He had called you a whore when you first told him you thought you were pregnant, it hadn't been more than two weeks since you'd last seen Jake and he was absolutely convinced that you two had fucked, even though he had been with you the whole time. You couldn't understand why every guy you dated thought that there was something between you and the man who had always been your best friend, or why his girlfriends treat you the way they did, but you tried not to dwell on it for too long.

"Y/N." Jake sighs, the sounds coming from your end of the phone absolutely tearing him apart. It always tore him apart, the way that you would fret and cry over these..these boys that hadn't ever treat you in the way that you needed to be treated, or let alone loved you in the way that Jake knew you needed to be loved, because he did love you in a way that you would probably never know. He had always been to afraid to tell you, too afraid of it making you uncomfortable enough that you would leave his life. Maybe not immediately, but over time, and that thought scared him even more than telling you how he truly felt because goddamn he couldn't and wouldn't ever imagine a life without his babygirl in it.

Two hours of crying on the phone, of convincing you to calm down and to take your damn vacation like you had planned, because you deserved it, and 14 hours later, Jake had you in his arms, held tightly to his always muscular chest as he basked in the feel of you, the scent of your hair and perfume. You looked a mess, you were a mess he knew, but he didn't care.

"I missed you so much.." You sniffle, pulling away from him. You wipe your eyes as you look up at him, his usual charming smile plastered across his stupidly handsome face, you couldn't help the smile that spread across yours at the sight.

"No tears, babygirl, no tears.." He says, bringing a thumb up to help you wipe your eyes. You lean into his touch, as if that was all the comfort you needed in the world and you watched the way his face softened, you loved that.

"Happy tears, i promise." You chuckle, leaning against him as he lead you to the baggage claim carousel for your flight. Your suitcases were easy to see, he'd seen them a million times before and didn't even need to double check to make sure he was right, he recognized the small stain on the bottom by the wheel that had been his doing. "You don't have to carry my bags Jake, you've already done enough by coming to get me."

"I always pick you up from the airport whenever you visit," He says, looking down at you as if what you said was absolutely insane. He grabbed the cases with ease and started wheeling them away, letting you carry your carry on bag. "Besides, if my mama ever found out i didn't carry a woman's bags for her, she'd drag me out of work by my ear and give me a talking to." He says only half jokingly. Mama Seresin had been a strict woman, but a loving one and had instilled all the southern gentlemen charms in all of her boys, quite proudly she liked to say.

"I know, and i feel like it's alot to ask, I dont mind carrying my own bags, Jake.." You say, following after him. You wore a baggy sweatshirt and some shorts, you knew it was hot in the San Diego area but you weren't wanting to risk Jake asking if you'd gained weight if your normal clothes looked different, you weren't ready to tell him yet.

"And i feel like it's the least i could do, you literally sat on an airplane for four hours just to come see me, you dont need to carry your bags to the truck too.." He says in a way that told you not to argue about it any farther, so you don't.

The trip to his truck isn't too long, he managed to find decent parking not far from the arrivals gates and you had planned your flight for a time when you knew it wouldn't be massively busy, but the drive to his off base apartment felt like it took hours. Jake talked most of the time, making sure the A/C was blowing on you at full blast because you looked sweaty, telling you about his friends and how they couldn't wait to meet the girl he was always talking about, about how he was looking forward to having a permanent position at the TOP GUN academy, even though it meant he couldn't be close to you at home anymore.

You listened the whole way, but your mind was on the little thing in your womb now, growing by the moment. Your mind was on the man who had up and left you as soon as you said it might have been a possibility because he swore you were a whore. Your mind was on your own Mama, who had passed away many years ago, you wished she was here to tell you what to do. You knew you could go to Jake's mama, she had always been like your own in some ways but you also knew that she couldn't keep a secret to herself, Jake would be the first phone call as soon as you were out of earshot and you didn't want him to find out in that way. You didn't want him to find out at all, afraid of what he would say, of disappointing him, you hated that thought more than you hated the thought of your Daddy being disappointed at you.

You had contemplated making an appointment at planned Parenthood, you knew you weren't too far along, it was still a possibility for you, but you couldn't bare the thought of it, as upset as you were. The universe had given you this curveball for a reason, you had to believe that, even if you didn't agree with it. You had to believe that this accident had a purpose.

You hadn't noticed that Jake had pulled into a small parking lot, or that he had even parked the car at all until his hand waved in front of your face, snapping you out of your reverie. "...Earth to Y/N..." You blinked rapidly a few times, taking in a deep breath as you turned to look at him. "You good?"

You smile forcefully, and his eyebrows furrow. "Sorry, i spaced for a minute. It's been a long couple of weeks, my brain wasn't all the way with it.." You say, looking outside the windshield. "Why are we at the beach?" You ask, your eyebrows furrowing now. A sandy strip of beach was in front of the truck, you could see the waves crashing against it and you could make out some people milling about, birds flying over head. If you squinted, you could make out a couple of surfers on the water, waiting for a decent swell to ride in.

"Because i live in the building right over there." Jake says softly, getting the feeling that something other than the breakup was bothering you. You were usually full of chatter, typically, jake couldn't get a word in edgewise when you were around, and he loved that about you, but today? Today it was all him and that worried him.

You glance towards the building to your right, confused. "Oh.." You shake your head and unbuckle your seatbelt, opening the door to his truck to get out when his large hand on your elbow stops you, his fingers wrapping around it and pulling you back towards him. "...Jake?"

He sighs, looking at you with that stern, but probing glance, as if he were looking into your soul. "..Are you sure you're okay?" He asks after a moment of hesitation, he wanted to know what was going on but he didn't want to push it too hard.

You could have cried right then and there, and you almost did as you could feel the tears welling in your eyes, your chin quivering as you tried desperately not to let them fall. You could only hope that he didn't notice. "Yeah," You nod, giving him the best smile that you possibly could, putting your other hand on top of his and giving it a squeeze. "I'm okay Jake, i promise.."

Jake doesn't believe you, not one bit but he knows that he'll figure out whats going on eventually, or you'll break down and tell him. You always did. He nods once, letting go of your arm before taking the keys out of the ignition and hopping out. You follow suit, having to jump down before joining him at the bed of the truck, where he lifts your bags out and sets them down.

The rest of the day goes smoothly, you settle into the guest room that he had made up for you, and you catch up with him on what he hadn't filled you in on over the phone. He made you lunch, and took you for a walk on the beach, letting you lean against him as you enjoyed the smell of the ocean.

Jake couldn't help but wish that he was able to do that with you all the time, hold you while you guys walked on the beach, or make lunch and eat it with you. He loved being with you all the time, and he always had, he just had never realized until it was much too late that it was because he loved you. He didn't like to dwell on it too much though, he didn't like the yearning and the sadness and anger it brought him. There was no need for it when you were with him now, even if only for a little while.

By the time sunset comes around you're starting to turn into the you that he's used to, the happy, goofy babygirl he had always known, and he can't help but think it's because you're happier here with him than you were with your ex, wishful thinking, he knew. But alas, a man could dream, couldn't he?

You were sat on the couch in Jake's living room, watching a game show like you used to when you were kids when you heard his phone ping with a text message. You chuckle as he groans grumpily, half asleep with your legs in his lap, and shifts to reach for his phone on the small table next to the couch.

You watch him roll his eyes and poke his tongue out as he types out a reply to whomever it was, you grin before poking him in the chest with your foot. "What was that eyeroll for?" You ask, half amused and half curious. You always were the nosey type. "Was it Rooster?" He had told you about how rocky their friendship was, but that it was getting better, you knew that Rooster could annoy the hell out of Jake without even trying and you thought it was absolutely hilarious because you knew that you used to do the same thing.

Jake sighs, looking at you with that million dollar smile of his. "If you must know, Babygirl," He starts and you cant help but giggle a little. "It was Phoenix, the squad are all heading to the Hard Deck and they wanted to know if I was coming." He says and you hum at him in response. "I'm telling them no, I'm sure you don't want to go and i don't want to leave you alone."

You think on it for a moment, staring at him before making your mind up. "Lets go." You say, sitting up and swinging your legs off of his lap. You miss the pout that he makes, his eyebrows furrowing at the loss of your touch. "I want to meet your other friends, i bet they could tell me some stories." You say with a giggle, going towards the guest room to change into better clothes.

Jake watches after you and stands with an exaggerated sigh after a moment. "Fine, but I'm only going so they tell you the good stories!" He says and you cackle knowing damn well that they would probably spin you some tales about the man you've known for a good portion of your life, you didn't mind because you could tell them some things that would make them piss themselves in return.

It wasn't long before the two of you are out the door, Jake locking it after you before walking with you to his truck. You were honestly feeling alot better about things with your ex after only being with him for a few hours, Jake always had that affect on you to make things feel better when it felt like the world was tumbling down around you.

You sing along to the country station as Jake drives, the windows down in his truck letting the ocean breeze flow through the cab as you guys go along the coast, and within a few moments you see the lights of the Hard Deck through the windshield and take note of the full parking lot.

"Damn Jake, is it always this busy?" You ask, slightly on edge by the amount of people that were probably in the bar, you put your hand on your tummy subconsciously, which Jake caught out of the corner of his eye as he found a parking space. That struck him as odd, you had never been the socially nervous person before.

That was Jake's first clue. You declining a chilled tequila in favor of water was his second, and honestly it was the only one that he needed to make the assumption. You never turned down tequila, especially after a breakup like this. Eyebrows furrowed in thought as he introduces you to his friends, Jake watches you throughout the night, merely sipping on his beer as he did, keeping an eye on you as moved throughout the bar.

Phoenix and Rooster absolutely loved you, they couldn't believe that you and Jake had been friends for as long as you had, or that you could stand to be around him and his ego. Bob had thought you were his long distance girlfriend from the way that he always talked about you, and the fact that he rarely every called you anything besides Babygirl. You chuckled at the trio, about to tell them that he had never once in your entire friendship called anything other than Babygirl if it wasn't absolutely necessary, when you felt your stomach lurch as Penny brought a plate of seafood around your area of the bar. Quickly, you excuse yourself, just barely making it to the bathroom before the vomit spews out of you.

Jake was hot on your tail, had even followed you into the bathroom to dutifully hold your hair for you, his large hand rubbing your back as you heaved the contents of your stomach into the toilet. "Jesus Y/N.." He says, a serious edge to his voice. He wasn't sure what he was upset about, the fact that you hadn't told him immediately, or that your boyfriend had left you. "How long?" He asks when you stand up, wiping your face with a paper towel he had handed you.

You let out a soft sigh, making your way to the sink where you splash your face with water, hoping that if you delayed the answer he would go away. He catches your eye through the mirror, arms crossed over his chest as he gives you that look of pure concern.

"..Two months, i think.." You finally say and Jake's jaw clenches. Your lip quivers, terrified that he's angry with you as scared tears well up in your eyes. "He..he called me a whore..he thought i slept with you and he called me a whore and he left and he took all of his things and he blocked my number and jake i dont know what to fucking do because this wasn't part of my plan!" You wail in one breath, completely breaking down in the bathroom of the bar.

Jake is almost startled by your outburst, but it quickly turns to anger at the words that left your mouth, at the accusation that your ex had made towards you. Jake knew you were a fiercely loyal person, you wouldn't have ever cheated on him, but he was more than certain that he would have cheated on you, how else could he have called you that so easily?

Jake swallows his anger, noticig your tears coming harder and faster down your face and crosses the small bathroom to pull you into his arms, letting you rest your face on his chest as he holds you, letting you sob all over his shirt. "It's okay, Babygirl.." He says, looking at the sight in the mirror. If there was one thing Jake Seresin knew for certain, it was that he was going to make sure you were cared for, it may not have been his baby but you absolutely weren't on your own in this, he wouldn't let you be. "You're not alone..i promise you.."

#top gun #top gun hangman #top gun fanfic #top gun requests #hangman #jake seresin x reader #jake seresin fluff #jake seresin angst #jake seresin fanfic #jake seresin request #jake hangman seresin

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canonically47 · 2 months

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so we all agree that Alec's the main antagonist now, right?

definitely. he's pulling all the strings right now.

the main villains right now are:

fiore. a very, very strong player in season 1, fiore is now unable to strategize and manipulate as well as she previously did, everyone now knowing her shenanigans. she cannot make any bargains... but hunter and ally seem to be willing to work for her. a possible plotline that will be tended to later.

ellie. after messing up the girls alliance, the focus wasn't on ellie all that much this episode. however, we did see tess comforting aiden - will tess turn on gabby and ellie, especially ellie? right now, ellie is in almost no position to win, and desperately needs the villains alliance.

yul. the worst ever, but let's ignore that for a second... and he's still the worst ever. he had an early elimination and everyone knows just how much of a loser he is. without grett, he wouldn't survive a day. which brings me to her.

grett. dependent on yul, but according to my theory on my last post, she might have voted for him, which is incredibly interesting to see. i believe grett will have an important role in the story very soon once this is addressed - which has to be sooner rather than later, since yul is gunning for connor, thinking he voted for him. it's clear that the writers want us to believe grett or riya voted for yul, because they clearly showed us connor didn't.

riya. she's smart, but very, very cocky. her entire plotline revolves around connor. she is disliked by everyone but him, and yul called her what should be classified as a slur, so she's got that going for her.

but alec... now, alec's the great deal here. alec has everyone wrapped around his finger. with miriam gone, grett choosing to vote with him rather than against him and by extention so did yul, fiore clearly by his side, and ellie and riya agreeing as well, alec is the main deal. he's the one pulling the strings, and will be until one of the annoying heroes swoops in - - but when? when will they do that? when jake and tom stop ignoring each other or, at best, fighting? when ally and hunter finally communicate? when connor finds allies? when tess retalliates against ellie and gabby? when aiden, tom and jake work together? it is terrifying just how much power alec holds in the game right now. if the writers don't play some bullshit hErOeS aLwAyS wIn!111!!11! tHe MaGiC oF fRiEnDsHiP and if they write him well, he will play his cards right and make it far, far, FAR. and i cannot wait to watch him burn the world :3

#anon #anonymous #asks #my asks #disventure camp #disventure camp all stars #dcas #campamento desventura #odd nation cartoons #disventure camp alec #disventure camp fiore #disventure camp ellie #disventure camp yul #(vomits)#disventure camp grett #disventure camp riya #(vomits again)

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ballsgrabber69 · 9 months

Text

transman!chuuya x male!dazai

TW: PAST ABUSE, RAPE, SEXUAL ASSAULT!

Loud, whorish moans filled the silent house. And maybe a few screams. Dazai was stroking Chuuya's oh so sensitive clit, making the shorter man cry out.

"F-fuck! Osamu, please!!" The ginger almost wailed. He's been edged for an hour or two, and he just did the No Nut November challenge. He's never had sex with Dazai. He was always scared.

He thought that the brunette would really make fun of him, shaming him, degrading him, but when he had finally brought up the courage to tell the taller man, he expected him to leave him again. The first time he left was for a good reason; he knew Dazai had left to get away from an abusive environment, and he thought that not being a real man would be another good reason.

No body ever made him feel human. Just because he wanted to be a man?

Somehow, his dickhead ex had found out, who was stronger than him, came to his house and hurt him, beat him, but most of all, raped him. Now Chuuya isn't a little omega, no. He fought back. He hurt his ex. Bad. He's in the hospital right now, because of Chuuya Nakahara himself. He was scared to have sex with Dazai, but now is his first time. Now he likes it. Now he's taking it slow. He's easing him with touches, but now he's also teasing him.

The brunette gently shushed the sobbing man, stroking his clit just a bit faster. Chuuya's eyes rolled back as he felt this intense feeling creep into his stomach. His hips were shaking as well as his thighs.

"Samu, I think.. If you keep touching me like this, I think I'm g-gonna finally cum!-"

As soon as the ginger said that, with the little cock on his clit leaking, his hole pulsating, thighs shaking, head thrown back, the brunette cruelly pulls away, making the usually calm Mafioso wail.

"Not yet, you poor thing~" Dazai whispered in a hushed voice.

The poor executive let out a loud sob when he felt the detective cup his small breast.

Dazai once again hushed the sobbing man, thin, but full lips gently grazing a soft, puffy, pink nipple, coaxing it to harden. Then, his tongue came to play. He was touching, teasing only one of Chuuya's breasts, making the smaller man whimper.

Chuuya groaned when he felt a warm, wet tongue circle around his hardened bud, and began to gently suckle on it. Dazai was proud of himself; he knew that only him can bring out the ginger's submissive side. Everyone's seem his strong, dominant side, but nobody's ever seen this side, and they both would rather keep it that way. The redhead's clit began to throb again, meaning he was close. A warm knot was rising in his stomach, and the man trembled.

Dazai noticed, and a smirk came in his face.

"Oh? Is chibi about to come?~" The brunette asked, licking the other man's nipple slightly faster.

"Yes! I'm so close! I!-" Chuuya got cut off by a obscene moan when he felt the warm, warm, almost hot knot rising in the pit of his stomach. His cunt was twitching, leaking so desperately. He didn't know if it needed to be touched it if he just needed to cum. Maybe it was both.

Dazai shushed the smaller man, sucking on his nipple harshly to get all the spit up before cruelly pulling away again, an annoyed whine coming from the bottom.

"Fucking mackerel." He muttered. "I hate you."

"I love you too, slug!" The taller man spread Chuuya's legs open again, cupping his face and pressing a deep, gentle kiss to the smaller's lips.

Dazai's hand moves down Chuuya's too skinny stomach, feeling his abs, and the spiky hairs of his recently shaved cunt. Toffee eyes look into ocean, asking is he was really ready. Blue nods at toffee and gives a ready look. The brunette nods, and a strangled shriek leaves the ginger's mouth when shockingly soft fingers leave a toned stomach, find a desperate, swollen clit, and finally begins to stroke it.

"Fuck! Please, please, please!!-" Ocean eyes are filled with tears as they look at toffee, those eyes smirking back down. He wants this. He needs this. Dazai's hands feel absolutely nothing like Those hands that hurt him in the past. When he was sixteen, eighteen, and just barely a year ago.

Those breasts are bouncing slightly as those fingers continue to stroke a cute, engorged clit. Dazai's looking up at his husband, his brawn, his partner in crime, his lover...Ooh, he's in love. He loves the way usually cold, icy blue eyes roll back from every brush upon the tight pink pussy.

Chuuya's eyes are rolled back, his thighs shaking. Who would've known that Dazai Osamu, the man he hated, would become the man he loved. He's moaning and whimpering loudly, drooling in some places. Tears are leaving tracks on his face as long, slender fingers stroke and brush over his leaking cunt. He can't see Dazai's gentle smirk as he gradually picks up the pace. He feels a lick on his ear, as well as a gentle whisper, telling him that it's gonna be okay, that those hands aren't haunting him. It's gonna be his true, first orgasm. One of pleasure and not pain.

"It's okay, Chuuya.. I've got you." That same gentle whisper. Dazai Osamu.

The knot was coming faster and faster, and Dazai knew. Chuuya was trembling, shaking. Not because he was scared, although that's one of the reasons, but because it felt so intense.

"S-Samu..! I'm scared.." Chuuya whimpers, his breathing growing a little bit frantic.

"Shh, slug. I got you." Fuck, that gentle whisper that always made the ginger weak. "I'm not him. Alright? Now, I want you to let go."

Chuuya's eyes slowly roll back as he nods.

"I'm gonna count down, and you're gonna release, alright? It's not gonna hurt. I have you."

Another nod.

"Ten."

Dazai's fingers slow just a tad so he can have Chuuya completely ruined when he's done.

"Nine."

Soft fingers brush over an extremely sensitive nipple.

"Eight."

Chuuya's eyes roll back completely.

"Seven."

The ginger's breathing is getting heavier as he gets closer and closer to his first painless orgasm.

"Six."

Dazai's soft fingers fondle with his tongue piercing as soon as his soft, wet tongue slides out.

"Five."

Slender fingers stroke his clit faster again.

"Four."

Soft, somewhat thick thighs begin to tremble, and when they threaten to clamp shut, a bandaged hand moves away from the tongue piercing, and rubs the smaller's stomach, keeping his legs spread.

"Three."

Gloved hands are gripping the sheets.

"Two."

Dazai's fingers are moving even faster, and the knot in Chuuya's stomach is threatening to snap.

"One."

Soft lips kiss horrifyingly, traumatizing scarred and bruised skin. He never knew Chuuya been through this, or even had a soft side.

"Go ahead, Chuuya. You can cum now."

It was as if the ginger's body was waiting for those words. With a scream, Chuuya's spilling his liquid lust all over the place. The orgasm rocked him to the core. His eyes immediately rolled back, and his back arched until it cracked as if he was stretching. Maybe he needed that. He's squirting all over Dazai's hand, making it sheen and shiny with his juices. Dazai whispered assurances in the smaller's ear, slowly working him through his orgasm, still stroking his squirting clit as fast as he was. It was so fucking intense and long, but it wasn't painful. It didn't hurt. It felt...so good. Chuuya was sobbing, screaming, but it was all in pleasure. A good pleasure. The orgasm was blinding Chuuya and his senses. He's forgetting how to even breathe because it's so intense.

From the sight, Dazai felt as if he was gonna cum in his boxers, because his cock was twitching.

When he saw the small man relax, and his sobs and screams subside and die down to whimpers and moans, his fingers gradually slowing to work him through the last bit of the orgasm and pulling away.

But the brunette doesn't stop.

He's still going, now brushing his tongue against the overstimulated clit. Chuuya's sobbing as he quickly and undeniably approaches another extreme orgasm. His eyes are crossing, and God, he explodes again.

He cums in Dazai's mouth, sobbing as he grips his hair. His back is arched, screaming out his name as he wails from the overstimulation. His face and chest is red. His chest heaved as he squirts uncontrollably. His eyes are rolled back and he stopped breathing.He sobs as he throws his head back, shaking like crazy. He sobs in overstimulation. His eyes squeeze shut and he sobs louder, squirting everywhere and making a huge mess. It's so...beautiful. Seeing the usually cold, brutal Mafioso open up and lose himself to Dazai.

When he's done and the brunette feels the grip loosen, he pulls away, licking his lips and kissing the ginger's. He's a pile of whimpering, sobbing and wheezing. He's recovering from his second orgasm now.

Chuuya was a panting mess now, absolutely nothing like how he usually is. Ocean hated it but toffee loved it.

"One more, Chuu?"

"F-Fine! Just o..one more!"

And so Dazai took the throbbing, quivering, cunt back into his mouth. Chuuya sobs as he feels the taller man flick his tongue back and forth, up and down over Chuuya's hypersensitive pussy. It didn't take long for Chuuya to cum again.

"Awhh, how cute.. Chuuya's gonna cum again, is he?~" Dazai smirks, his tongue flicking faster and faster until his lips press on the clit and gives it a gentle kiss before licking it again, holding Chuuya's shaking legs open as he soothingly rubs his horribly, horrendously scarred thigh.

"Y-yeah!" Chuuya moans

"Then do it. Cum for me, sweet thing.."

Chuuya lost himself as soon as toffee eyed said that, and it hit the blue eyed man so damn hard.

The feeling took over him as he continued to moan and sob, his hand gripping the bed and the other gripping his own hair, his toes curling as his face scrunched into a grimace. Tears streamed down his red face. Chuuya was loud from the insane orgasm, squirting everything out.

He threw his head back in pleasure. The pressure was everywhere. This was full body. He couldn't move, just letting the feeling of his third orgasm take over him as he sobbed, whimpered, moaned and whined. His chest heaved and his small, adorable breasts bounced slightly as he kept touching, teasing and eating him. His eyes crossed as his tongue lolled out, his eyebrows furrowing as his sapphire eyes became unfocused before he closed them again. It wouldn't stop..

He began to swear and whimper under his breath, his small body shaking and writhing as Dazai sucked his sensitive cunt. He let out more sobs, almost turning to screams of pleasure. He lost control. Heaving, gasping sobs left him as the overstimulation blurred and overrode his senses.

When Chuuya was done, Dazai's tongue flicked slower and slower, but he still wanted to see the executive lose himself again, so he moved quicker again. A shattered moan escaped the ginger's lips.

He drove his tongue inside of the smaller man, strumming out another loud moan that was music to his ears. He was quite an instrument to play, so finely tuned, and if he touched him right, he made the most glorious sounds; sexy, raw, intense, absolutely delicious noises of pleasure as Dazai plundered Chuuya with his tongue. He grabbed wavy brown hair, yanked and pulled him closer to his throbbing cunt. He thrust one finger inside him, switching the angle it and hitting her in the spot that turned her moans into one long, loud scteam of pure pleasure.

The orgasm sounded and looked extremely intense. When he was done, Dazai completely pulled away from the overstimulated sex.

Dazai shuddered against Chuuya, his legs quaking, and when he finally slowed to look up at the ginger, he saw his hair was a wild tumble, and her face was glowing.

"Are you alright, Chuuya?" A concerned Dazai asked.

"Mm.. Mhm.." An exhausted Chuuya groaned, his head tilting to the side in exhaustion. His chest was heaving as gasping sobs and hiccups wrack him gently.

"Oh, baby.. Did I hurt you?.." The brunette asks gently, taking the redhead into his arms and holding him.

Chuuya shook his head. "T-that was s..so fucking intense.. That felt so good.."

Dazai gives a content laugh. "That's good, baby.. Now why don't we clean up and sleep, hm?"

"Good idea.."

And so they did. They bathed together, Chuuya cooked a little something for them both because everybody and their mama knows that Dazai would be blew up the whole human population trying to cook. They had a little fun in their free time, cuddled and went to sleep together.

Though when they fell asleep, only one of them dreamt.

#bungou stray dogs #bsd chuuya #bsd dazai #sub chuuya nakahara #dom dazai osamu #chuuya nakahara #dazai osamu #soukoku #trans chuuya

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armpirate · 1 month

Text

Soundleasure | Choi San || CH. 11

Pairings: Soft!San x fem!reader || Strangers to lovers, fake dating

Genre: smut, angst, fluff, online sex, ghosting

Warnings: inexperienced!San, fem!reader, masturbation, online sex, camboy, first times.

Summary: You can do whatever you please and be whoever you want on the Internet. And San knew that a little bit too well.

After finally following all the signs the universe was throwing at him, he started living a double life that no one was aware of. Everyone in his daily life knew him as Choi San, the reserved and quiet boy who wouldn't raise his voice, and would barely communicate with anyone outside of his comfort group. But only a few knew him as Soundleasure, the man with a sexy voice and a filthy mind that had their toes curling just with his narrations.

He never thought of the possibility of those two lives ever meeting, he had always tried for them to follow a parallel route and had always played safe to keep his friends from ever suspecting that side even existed. But his plans will start to crumble when he gets a little too close with one of his subscribers and she invades his real-self and altergo's universes without being able to stop it.

Y/n will not only help him to keep his secret from his circle, but will also show him there's more of Soundleasure in him than he'd like to admit.

Previous || Next

MASTERLIST

Aprox. time of reading: 16 minutes

While the teacher was still going on on a topic he didn't pay attention to, San thought on how to reschedule his evening so he'd have time to record the content for the video and study after he met Y/n.

He didn't know why he rejected her at first the previous day, because he was dying to find the tiniest excuse to see her again. She offered it to him, and he rejected it without giving it a second thought. Not only that, but he also saw the way her glance turned sadder after his first refusal, letting disappointment take over it.

San didn't care how pathetic he'd seem sending her a text later to take back his decision, he didn't care how desperate he could seem by later saying he wanted to do it. He'd do many things like that just to hear her excited voice and her shy "Thank you" again.

He was so dumb for ever thinking of giving up the only chance he had.

When his phone buzzed, he couldn't help but smile at the idea of Y/n texting him to remind him about the plan they had. Although that smile suddenly turned into an annoying huff when he saw who it was.

Soulmate: Do you have something to do later?

San: Yes.

San: And can you stop changing your name on my phone??

Soulmate: It's better this way. It fits me more

San rolled his eyes before he changed his name back to the one he was saved as, before he touched his phone without his consent.

Woo: What are you going to do?

He hesitated on being straightforward with the answer. For his friends, Y/n and him were pretty much still together, it was nothing weird to keep treating her as his girlfriend with them.

San: I have plans with Y/n

Woo: Uhhhh

Woo: San and Y/n, sitting in a tree, KISSING

Probably he had known his friend for way too long, because he could clearly hear his voice singing that line while he read the text.

Woo: First comes love

Woo: Then comes marriage

San: What do you need?

He interrupted him, knowing Wooyoung would go on with the song lyrics if he didn't stop him.

Woo: My charger broke, can you buy me one?

San: Sure. Do you want me to bring it to your office?

Woo: Nahh, no worries

Woo: I'll borrow one from someone

Woo: Thank you!

And along with that text, the gif of a cute puppy sending kisses appeared on his screen right after.

Typical Wooyoung.

As the moment to see her got closer, his anxiety levels increased as well. He felt uneasy, nervous, unable to pre-plan all the possible scenarios that would lead after meeting Y/n. And, for a quick moment while he was on the bus to the mall, he was regretting ever telling her he'd agree on doing any of that. It was so ironic how he suddenly contradicted all the positive thoughts he could only think about not even two hours back.

Y/n: I'm waiting by the font

She let him know. San was aware she only did it to let him know where he was supposed to head as soon as he arrived at CambridgeSide, but that text added more pressure to the fact that he was just a few steps from facing her.

He was only a few minutes away, the fountain was right at the entrance and the bus stop wasn't that far away, but he for sure made it seem that it was further than it actually was. Whenever he took a step forward, he reconsidered what he was doing and took two steps back -he could tell those people around him thought he was crazy.

Y/n: I know it might seem like it, but I don't bite

How could he tell her that he actually wanted her to bite him, and suck him... and do everything she pleased to him.

Confused by her text, San lifted his eyes from his phone, catching a hand waving in the air not that far from where he was, aware that Y/n had been witnessing his weird walk and inner fight that kept making its way out of his mind.

—Ignore what you saw, please —he first said, as soon as he stopped in front of her.

—Why? —she giggled, standing up from the bench she was sitting at— I think it was cute.

She actually couldn't remember the last time a man was so nervous to meet up with her. She was so used to that toxic masculinity, as they tried to show off how confident they were, that seeing San struggling to meet up with her was kind of endearing.

—Did you come straight from class? —she pointed out, aware of his computer backpack hanging on his shoulder.

—Oh... yeah —he nodded, holding onto the strap.

—You should've told me. I'd have told you to meet up later.

By the way she was dressed, completely opposite to the laid back outfit she wore on Saturday night, he could tell she also came straight from her workplace.

—You also came straight from work —he noticed, pointing at the black briefcase that hung on her shoulder—. We should've met up later for you, not because of me. I usually take one hour to get home anyway.

Y/n giggled silently at his response, looking away just to get back to her neutral personality before she said something stupid or, even worse, blushed in front of him.

—I usually stay a bit longer in the office —she informed—, so technically speaking, it's the same. Let's not worry about that, then.

She made it so easy. She made everything so natural and light, that he wondered what was that thing that always made him doubt on whether to meet up with her or not.

—Why did we meet up here? —San finally asked, looking at the big "CS" sign on the top window of the building.

—Hmm, you agreed on faking the relationship in front of my dad —San nodded, encouraging her to continue—. I thought that maybe you'd need a bit of... tuning.

—Tuning? —he frowned.

She genuinely loved his style. San already gave the perfect college boyfriend with his gray hoodies and oversized t-shirts, but if she wanted her father to leave her alone with that whole thing, she needed a bit of help to turn him into the man that would go through the first filter in front of her father's eyes.

—What's wrong with me?

—Nothing —she answered fast—. You're fine.

Maybe a little bit too much.

—But you look like you're still in the first year of college, and I need you to look like you know what taxes are —she excused herself—. I knew if I told you I would do this, you wouldn't have agreed.

Although she wasn't exactly right. He probably would've hesitated a bit more at the idea of the var being a bit higher, but he probably would've ended up in the right same spot in front of her.

—It'll be just the outfit for the dinner —she added—. You won't have to pay for anything. I'll buy it for you, and you can keep everything.

—I guess that's right.

Her smile widened at his answer, squirming in excitement before her hand reached for his wrist over the fabric of his hoodie, dragging him inside the mall.

San didn't quite remember when was the last time he bought any clothes for himself, he was sure the hoodie he was wearing at that moment was part of his closet during his high school years. The only difference was that it looked a bit smaller than when he bought it back then.

They walked past several shops, although Y/n didn't even look at a single one of them. They moved all the way to one of the shops on the second floor, as if she had the whole route settled and nothing would manage to divert her from it.

As soon as they stepped inside, San could tell there was a huge difference in the vibe that store had in comparison to the others they walked past. There was barely anyone inside, except for the two assistants and the three suited middle-aged men looking around some of the hangers. The clothes were perfectly carved on the white tables, there wasn't a single wrinkle on either of them.

San followed her around the shop, while she looked through all the clothes that could convince her and, at the same time, fit him. Out of curiosity, he looked at the tag of one of the white shirts she had left back on the hanger before she continued with her search.

Three hundred bucks for a simple white shirt?

—Why don't we buy those clothes somewhere else? —he suggested— I'd rather you not have to sell a kidney for them.

She simply scoffed, finally lifting one of the dark blue shirts to his torso, checking the color with his skin.

—It's not like I can't afford it.

She left the shirt back to where it was, sighing.

Money wasn't a problem for her. Even after she gave up on half of her salary to keep two of her employees on her payroll, she still managed to save up some money. Unless it came to the repair of her car, which she knew would take her a few months of savings to be able to confront it.

—Still... there are shirts in other shops for fifteen dollars.

His comment almost got cut off by how close her hand was to his neck when she lifted another shirt, almost allowing him to feel the warmth of her body. Looking down at her was another big mistake, she was closer than expected, and he could almost feel his brain struggling to work out properly.

—My father would be able to tell straight away the shirt is fifteen dollars —she commented—. He's quite sensitive to fabrics and quality —she grimaced as she mentioned it—. I think this one would look good on you.

—That's why you didn't just tell me to buy formal clothes by myself?

—Ding ding ding —her fingertip hit gently the top of her nose as she momentarily turned to him—. If you're going to wear expensive clothes to fake to be my boyfriend, it's just fair I'm the one paying for them.

He continued following her around the shop, carrying the few things she kept picking up, along with two pairs of shoes.

As he zipped his pants and slid the belt through the thin spaces at the hip, he felt so strange. The pants were comfortable, and the fabric felt the nicest he had ever worn, but for some reason it didn't feel like him.

The curtain suddenly opened a bit, enough for Y/n to peek through it to see how it was going inside, causing San to jump and try to hide his exposed torso with the unbuttoned shirt.

—It's nothing I haven't seen already —she giggled at his slightly blushed cheeks.

She had seen further than just his torso in 4K on her screen, a few too many times since they started speaking, and he had been taking way too long inside the dressing room for her to think he could've needed help.

—If it makes you uncomfortable, I can wait outside though. I just wanted to check everything was alright.

—No, it's okay —he stopped her—. But come inside, the curtain is half opened.

After being aware, Y/n moved inside the wide dressing room he was at, closing the curtain behind her. Looking at him through the reflection, and admiring that new style on him, she was able to see how attractive that man actually was. He was already attractive, she liked his small details and how undercover all of his features went by his simple clothes. That style, and black as a color suited him in a way she didn't expect it would.

It was like his personality changed completely, and she could tell by the way his fingers moved up through his torso as he buttoned the shirt.

—If you stick it too inside, it'll be uncomfortable for you —Y/n mentioned, seeing the way his muscles started marking under the tight fabric of the shirt.

Her hands lowered to the edge of his pants, making him freeze on the spot as her fingers gently caressed his skin over his clothes while pulling the shirt up. When she looked up over his shoulder to check out his reflection in the mirror, their eyes finally met. Only then, hooked by those innocent and eager eyes, she was aware of how close she actually was, with her arms wrapped around him while her hands were still on his lower torso.

It was a gentle and simple touch with no further intentions, but somehow the environment got heavier once their eyes met. He didn't have to think of anything, he didn't need to come up with any fake scenarios, because the warmth of her body on his back was already doing all the work, feeling that familiar throb in a certain part of his body.

—Can you leave?

Y/n shortly frowned, looking up to him and having San looking down at her to reiterate how badly he needed her to get out of there before things turned worse.

—Please.

Before he could even finish pronouncing the word, her hands were already away from him and she stepped outside of the dressing room, assuring him she'd be waiting for him outside. San peeked through the curtain to make sure she was walking down the corridor, disappearing at the first turn to go back to the main shop.

He needed to get rid of the problem he was starting to have before it got worse.

—Okay. Disgusting things —his back was resting against the wall, while his head was thrown back as if that would help to eliminate every trace of proximity from her body.

When Y/n saw him again, she could tell he looked more relieved in comparison to how he looked when he was in the dressing room. Even the subtle tan of his skin disappeared for a moment back there.

—Is everything alright? —she finally asked.

—Yeah, it's just...

—It's okay —she rushed to say, when she realized how he was struggling to explain himself.

She crossed a limit, and San was too nice to tell her until it made him so nervous that he was forced to tell her to leave. She understood it.

He didn't dare to explain further, and confess she managed to bring out a side of him he didn't know existed. He didn't want to say out loud that he could go crazy with just a soft touch of her fingers.

—It'll be four hundred sixty five.

San squirmed at the price, making Y/n giggle at his reaction before she paid for the clothes with her credit card. She handed him the paper bag filled with his clothes and shoes, while she chatted with the assistant about one of the colognes on the shelves behind him.

—Yeah, my father went crazy looking for it —she commented—. I bet he'd love to know he won't have to order it online. Thank you so much —she smiled wide, attempting to step back.

—Thank you. Have a nice day —the young male answered back.

San followed her from behind, walking a bit faster to get to walk next to her as they exited the small shop. Right when he was about to speak, her ringtone blasted, getting her attention before he could even attempt to have it.

—I'm sorry. I really need to pick this one.

—Sure. I have to buy something, so I'll meet you up here when I'm done.

—Okay.

Before picking up the call, she waited for San to be far enough so he wouldn't be able to hear the call she was about to have. It wasn't like she felt like hiding it from anyone, but it just felt too complex to explain it at that moment.

—Miss Y/n? —a female voice asked from the other side.

She didn't really need her to tell where she was calling from. The number was saved, and it popped way too many times in the past two years for her not to recognize it.

—Yes. That's me —she sighed.

—Good afternoon, hope everything is going well. I'm Rebecca, from MST Clinic.

Y/n already knew that.

—I was calling to remind you there were a few tests pending from the biannual revision.

—Oh, shit —she muttered—. Sorry. I completely forgot.

—It's alright. We're here to remind you —despite not seeing her, Y/n could tell the lady was smiling just by her voice alone—. There was no date set, so I'm wondering if you have any preference...

—Next Wednesday could be?

She tried to remember whether she had any meeting scheduled or not, sure that she probably had nothing important for that day -and she'd probably be able to skip whatever came up.

—Wednesday... Eleven in the morning? —she suggested.

—Sure.

—I'd also like to ask: how have you been feeling? Has there been anything bothering you, any problems? Is your mobility correct?

—Hmm yes, for now. Since the last incident, I haven't had any problems.

—Have you adapted well to medication?

Considering she had been taking it for almost two years, it was quite obvious she adapted well to it. But she held back from letting out that harsh comment.

—Yeah, everything's fine.

—Okay, then —the woman sighed—. We'll see you on Wednesday. Have a nice day!

—Have a nice day you too.

Y/n took a quick look around, remembering how San mentioned he'd leave to buy something and come back shortly after, so she took the time to sit lean back on the crystal railing while she checked her phone -mainly concentrating on her emails and chats.

She lost track of how much time she stayed there, and how much time she spent there, but she lifted her head when she thought she had been there for a little bit too long.

And still no sign of San.

Her phone buzzed in her hand, thinking it could be him telling her to meet up somewhere else, or announcing he left, but a sigh of disappointment showed off when she saw her father on the screen.

—Where are you? I was going to invite you to eat something. Jennifer told me she didn't see you leaving for lunch today.

—Well, I'm on my way to have lunch right now —she sighed.

—By yourself? Send me the location and we'll eat together.

She was well aware her father had already eaten, but he was still offering to have lunch twice just so he'd eat, too.

—I'm not alone —she answered.

—Who are you with?

—My boyfriend —she rushed to say.

—That's great! Then send me the location so I can finally meet him.

—No.

—No? —a loud sigh came through the speaker— Why not?

—You'll scare him off. And he isn't ready to meet you.

—I'm eating no one —he tried to sound calm—. It'll be quick. It's either today, or this weekend. I'm just saying that, if it's on the weekend, it'll be just the three of us. You choose.

Which also meant he wouldn't hold back with some comments or questions.

—You shouldn't eat so much. What about a coffee instead? —she tried to negotiate.

—Deal —she felt relieved at her father giving in.

—I'm in CambridgeSide. See you at six, alright? At six —she remarked, hoping he wouldn't show up earlier.

And she agreed on meeting up with him when she had no idea where San was, she was the dumbest.

For a quick moment she thought that he possibly gave in to his instincts and left without telling her anything, although that thought disappeared when she saw him approaching her from afar. With one small difference.

At first she thought it was just the distance, then she wondered if he probably styled it differently while he went to do what he had to do. But the closer he was to her, the clearer it was that his hair looked shorter.

—I gotta go —she hung up at her father, unable to look away from him—. Your hair —she pointed out.

After he came out of one of the shops with Wooyoung's charger, he walked past a hair salon -not even taking two seconds to step back and stand outside of it. He wasn't sure at first, but there was something deep inside in him that was telling him to just do it. His hair wasn't a crazy length, just enough for it to be a headache to style it something, and to be forced to part his bangs because they'd get over his eyes if he didn't. It was a hairstyle that didn't fit with the clothes Y/n had bought for him, nor with the idea of the man her father wanted to meet.

A shorter hairstyle would probably work better.

—What?

—It looks good —she nodded, finally smiling.

—Ah, by the way —San started—. I'll pay for the clothes.

While he came up with several scenarios for the moment where he met a man he didn't even know the appearance of, the thought of Y/n paying for the bag that was resting over the small coffee table of the hair salon made him feel guilty. He got to the conclusion that the best thing he could do was to pay for all of the things that were in there.

—No, why? —she suddenly stopped, looking at him— I already told you it's my responsibility. Take it as a repayment?

—For what?

—You paid back my subscription —she reminded him—. And now I'm doing the same for you.

—Still...

—If you feel so bad, buy me something to eat —she interrupted him—. I haven't eaten all day, and I'm starving.

And she thought it'd also be a nice way to settle his role in front of her dad.

—You haven't eaten all day?

—No, I've been too busy to think about food —her head tilted to the side.

She had told him before how her stomach would completely go non-existent whenever her mind was focused on something, only able to feel hunger whenever she felt completely disconnected and in peace.

—You should've said it as soon as we met —he complained—. Let's go to eat something right now.

She wondered if it'd be a good idea to tell him then about what was going to happen, but then she thought that he'd probably get so nervous that he wouldn't take a single bite of his food.

She definitely couldn't tell him if she wanted him to enjoy a lunch he had been waiting for all day.

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man11c · 1 year

Text

Xavier x Reader - Maybe a few more lessons. Pt 6.

Plot - During second term, you join Nevermore academy. One of the first things you do is join the archery club, and from there you get to know Xavier Thorpe. At first he seems head over heels for Wednesday, but maybe at some point he'll see something in you? In school, you go through many dilemmas which you need to solve.

Part 6

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After Xavier and you finished the project, you didn't see him as much. You'd see him in some of your classes, and he'd catch you after school to chat to you or then again at archery. That was really it. You had no other excuse to see him.

You always noticed Xavier would disappear after his last class and would be gone for what seemed like hours. You overheard his friends talking about sometimes. Curiosity struck you, but you weren't one to go snooping in other business but what harm could it really be? After all, everyone wanted to know where Xavier disappeared to for so long the moment bell rang.

When you were anticipating for the bell to ring, it always seemed to drag out. Minutes seemed to take hours to pass. The seconds flicked over as you tried to patiently wait. It lasted a whole eternity before you got to the final stretch of class. Only a minute or two left before the end of the day. You thought you'd be mummified in your seat at the rate time was moving at. Yet finally, the loud and annoying bell you had been so desperate to ring finally made its appearance. You could finally let out a sigh of pure relief as you jumped up from your seat, putting things away. From afar, you kept your eye on Xavier. Xavier looked over to you and shot you a smile before he walked away from the class. He always remembered to say some sort of goodbye after class, or even something small like that.

Usually, you'd be strolling out of class, nowhere important to be but yeah, no - not today. You walked quickly out of the class to see where Xavier was headed off to. It turned into some sort of sneaking game. You walked out into the woods, it was strange for sure but it didn't matter yet. You tried to make little noise, avoiding the things in your path sat down to make you fail and expose you. Even mother nature was against you in this moment.

The walk wasn't long until Xavier made it to his location, and his companion, which he didn't know about... from the outside, it looked grubby, some worn down shed? Why the hell did Xavier drag himself all the way out for... this? And it had a padlock and everything. How strange, still your couldn't help but just imagine what could be inside in such a place. What could Xavier be hiding away in the woods. Well, you'd soon find out wouldn't you...?

You saw as Xavier slipped in, and you stayed behind a tree from a far. You groaned, you couldn't see anything from where you were standing. So you just had to wait, in this forest which you already forgot the path out of. That was a problem for later. It didn't seek long for Xavier to leave the shed for a moment and walk off. You took that moment. Heading right inside, and all your wild assumptions far off anything that was inside. Drawings, paintings. So much art, some grotesque snd grim to look at. Other so beautiful and delicate. You stared in awe as you looked at all the paintings. "Wow..." You said to yourself as you took a few steps around the dark room. You looked with admiration at the paintings but you couldn't help but notice multiple discarded paints and drawings of Wednesday. All shoved into one corner to hide them away. You went to look at them, stroking your fingers along the canvases that had been coated with paint and charcoal.

"I didn't know I had a secret admirer of my paintings." A sudden voice from behind you which caused you to get startled. Xavier stood at the door, his silhouette glowing agints the light outside. You turn slowly on your heel to bring yourself face to face with Xavier. "Don't worry, it's not the first time someone intruded into my studio... sure they had other reasons for it." Xavier didn't seem phased at all. "Xavier, your art is beautiful." You tell him, looking at his approaching tall figure with wispy hair. "They are so... powerful to look at." You turn back to look at the paintings around the room. You looked closely at the details on the paintings. Xavier stood there sort of flustered from your comments, but he tried to play it off. "I'm, I'm glad you like them (y/n). I spend a lot of my time in here painting. I would make too much of a mess in my dorm if I tried to paint." He laughed as he stood next to you, your shoulder scraping against his arm. "Why would you hide this? You should be showing these off." You rip your eyes away from the painting to look at Xavier. But he kept looking at the painting with a dim look in his eyes. A shaft of air around you, shifting up from the ground up onto your skin. Crawling up your legs.

"Not everyone looks at them the way you do, some are too weird to show. And most of them are from my dreams." Xavier told you, finally bringing his eyes back down to you. He could see the admiration in your eyes. His paintings were genuinely liked, even at their most raw state. "And then again, I got blamed for being a monstrous killer... so let's say that's put me off aswell." Xavier inhaled a deep breath.

The way he said it himself made you look at him confused, but it didn't look like he'd tell you any further. "It's nice to have someone like you liking my paintings. It inspires me, really." Xavier looked down at you, bits of hair falling from his ear. His eyes looked into yours, so intently, but it wasn't weird. His eyes held something you couldn't explain. It was silent. You were too busy looking into Xaviers eyes. At some point, you got slightly embarrassed of this and looked away to the side. "I noticed all your paintings of Wednesday, the way you painted her... it was so elegant. You are really good at capturing the beauty of her." You changed subject, assuming this would be something he'd be dying to talk of. Instead, he looked off... an expression of a person who has given up on something so dear to them. "Yeah, that'll be the last of them." Xavier walked over to them and turned them away, showing the canvases face against the harsh wood. Had he really given up on Wednesday now? "I'm like a dog chasing my tail. I go in circles again and again to try catch her, yet to no avail." Xaviers tone grew somber. He seemed so calm, but the hurting in his heart showed through under his reserved manner.

The topic changed not long after, and you sat and watched Xavier drawing. You didn't know what it was, his canvas opposite you. In the silence, there was sounds of a pencil gliding across the canvas and the soft bristles of his paintbrush mapping out things in his mind. Xavier looked so concentrated, his eye focused, and his fingers wrapped around his paintbrush. Holding it with so much love. You could tell he loved this. "I think, this might be the most beautiful addition to my work yet." Xavier voice cutting through the silence that hung around you. Excited you walked over. And what you laid your eyes on. It was ethereal.

Your mouth parted, yet no words left your mouth as you looked into your own eyes. And Xavier hovered behind you, looking down at you with a small gentle glint within his eyes. His eyes clung to the small features of your face, how your lashes were long and parted just right. How your nose sat on your face. He just looked at you, lost in your features meanwhile, you were too lost in your own. Wet paint sitting drying upon the big canvases. "It's to show my gratitude, for helping with the project and making archery more enjoyable. Thank you (y/n)."

You couldn't even process his words, but his voice mused through your ears. "Xavier... I'm? I don't know what to say." You tried to make up a sentence, but you had swallowed all your words, leaving you speechless. "Don't say anything, just... enjoy it." He raised his hand to the painting. You saw how the painting brought itself to life. It was you laughing and generally just being happy. You turn to look at Xavier, your eyes saying a lot more than you could say properly.

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I absolutely adored writing this. Oh my god... I made myself smile smh I love artist boys

Part 7 out now❗️❗️

Word count : 1446

#xavier x reader #xavier thorpe x you #xavier x y/n #xavier thorpe x reader #xavier thorpe #percy hynes white #wednesday #spotify #x reader #wednesday netflix #fanfic #xavier thorpe fanfic #nevermore #nevermore academy #bianca barclay #wednesday addams #wednesday series #Spotify

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wardenparker · 2 years

Text

You, Me & Mexico

Jack ‘Whiskey’ Daniels x female reader Co-written with @absurdthirst

Rating: Explicit Word Count: 16.9k Warnings: Mentions of deceased spouse and child (of course, it’s Jack), previous relationship, cursing, food mentions, alcohol consumption, aggressive use of a baseball bat, vaginal sex, unprotected sex. Dad!Jack, unplanned pregnancy (after the fact). Summary: Moving to New York with your teenage daughter would have been a big enough change all on its own. But when your new next-door neighbor rings your doorbell, your whole world is about to get flipped upside down. Notes: This silly little ‘What If?’ is inspired by our dear devotion to the Yeehonk Cowboy of Our Hearts, but also by the fact that I just got the results of my DNA kit back. Enjoy! 🤠🧡

Nothing ever stops moving from being stressful. Not the adventure, the chance to get away from that one annoying coworker in your office, not even being excited for the beautiful brownstone in the West Village that your grandmother left to you in her will. There's always things to worry about no matter how carefully you plan. What if something happens to your furniture on that moving truck? What if something important gets lost? Or left behind? What if the cat freaks out in his carrier because your fourteen-year-old has been playing the same song on repeat for the last two hours and the poor little ball of fluff just can't take it anymore? Thankfully, there doesn't seem to be any kind of horrific crisis with this move. At least not yet.

It's a sunny, cool morning in New York City and every passerby on the street seems happy to ignore your existence, leaving you to direct the movers as they bring the last of your things inside the biggest home you've ever owned. Mallory is already up in her room shoving furniture around to find the best configuration in her new room, and no doubt Astro is meowing his approval or disapproval with every change.

Getting settled will take a little time. New York City is nothing like anyplace you have lived before. But with a teenager who desperately wants to be a musician one day and the chance to actually own your own home? Asking your company for a transfer to the Manhattan office had been a no-brainer. "Maybe you'll meet somebody." Your mother had said, when you had told her you were moving. "There's so many men in New York City!" But you had insisted that the only man you needed in your and Mallory's life was your tomcat, and left it at that. There's just no use in pretending that you haven't compared every man in the last fourteen years to the man who gave you your daughter.

******

Groaning, Jack opens his eyes to the sounds of people working outside. Not unusual for a city that is constantly busy, but this is right outside his windows. Right. New people are moving in next door. The sweet old lady that had been his neighbor in passing for the last six years had died. Apparently leaving her house to her granddaughter. Sighing, the Statesman agent rolls out of bed and shuffles towards his bathroom. His body aches and he feels every day of his forty-one years after the beating he had taken on his last mission. For the first time since he had become an agent, Jack Daniels was looking forward to sitting at the office.

******

"Last load." One of the movers tells you, carefully pulling his hand-truck loaded with boxes marked Master Bedroom up the ramp they laid over your front steps when everyone arrived this morning.

“Thank you so much.” At this point there's nothing left for you to do but haul yourself inside, and you take a moment to lean against your front steps and really take it all in. The three-floor brownstone is sandwiched in the middle of a fully populated street and your grandmother's little window boxes are crammed full of cooking herbs and pansies that give the house a welcoming feel. You'll definitely keep those, you think, looking up and down the length of the building. But maybe not the faded floral curtains just inside.

******

The inside of his brownstone had been updated when it was chosen as his residence in New York. Modernized and filled with Statesman technology, but the thing he loves most is the walk-in shower. The hot water on demand beats down on the blooming bruises that ache and the stiff joints. He’s getting old, a realization he hates when he’s lived for the job for twenty years, since he lost the reason for living for someone else. The only other bright spot when he got down in his feels was the month-long interlude to his grief that is something he looks back on with fondness of an old love.

******

It's more than a half an hour later when the movers are vacating your new home, and you can hear Mallory happily crowing inside about having her own bathroom. For a teenager, finally having her own bathroom separate from her mother is the absolute epitome of privacy, and it makes you smile to hear her happy about something relatively simple. She had had to leave her few friends behind to start fresh in the big city, but you're not worried about her making new ones. She had her father's charm, for better or for worse, and people are drawn to her just like you were drawn to him fifteen years ago. With a contented sigh, you pull out your phone to take a few pictures of the front of the house now that it's officially home. You promised your mom that you would send them, after all. At some point today you'll have to search out the nearest grocery store, but not this very moment.

Getting dressed, Jack wonders about the new neighbor. He had been nosy, looking out the windows and saw evidence of a kid, at least a teenager. He chuckles to himself, wondering if the newest residence had been told about the raccoon that frequents the back gardens between the houses and loves to raid the trash cans. As he buttons up his dress shirt, he decides that after work, he’ll be neighborly and introduce himself.

Three Weeks Later:

"Mal, take the groceries in through the kitchen door, sweetie, not the front door." Once a week grocery trips to the market have been a whole different experience than your old chain grocery store used to be, but now you've got a bunch of bags of fresh things that are brand new favourites to fill your kitchen with. The trick is to remember that you technically have two front doors here, and the old servants' entrance to the 120-year-old brownstone leads directly into the kitchen, so you don't have to climb your front steps to go into the parlour-level front door and then down the stairs inside to get to the kitchen.

No neighbors have emerged to introduce themselves in the time since you moved in, but you figure that's just New Yorkers keeping to themselves and you don't worry about it. Mallory's school year has begun and even with the change of location, work is just work. New York isn't feeling all too different from anywhere else so far, except for the neighbors being less nosy. And honestly? That's just fine with you. Tonight you're making Mal's favourite dinner to celebrate finally unpacking the last box, and that required a big grocery trip. You're not inclined to skimp, though, because you really would do anything for your little girl. Even if she's a lot less "little" then she used to be.

******

Living in the city had taken some time to get used to. He was comfortable here now, enjoying the way that he had convenience to everything, but he missed the sense of community he had in Kentucky. While they were spread out, people waved and talked and asked about the family when they saw one another. Here, he didn’t see his neighbors, still not having gotten a look at the new ones that had moved in three weeks ago. That’s partly his fault, getting caught up at work had made it easy to continuously put off going over and introducing himself. So he’s making up for it.

The large white box in his hand holds a selection of – in his opinion – the finest bakery selections in the city. Which is saying something. Jack pops up the steps of the neighboring brownstone, his knees protesting creakily, and rings the bell.

It's surprisingly easy to hear the doorbell from downstairs in the kitchen, although you don't know anyone who would be ringing it. Maybe this is your first taste of door-to-door proselytizing that you never got living in small towns. "I'll be right back," you tell Mallory before hustling up to the front door. When you peak through the peephole in the door there's a man standing on your front step but his back is turned, so you just figure what the hell and pull open the door. "Hi. Can I help you?"

Jack turns around, the charming, easy smile on his face freezing when he comes face to face with you. You’re older, he can tell, but the time has been good to you. Dumbfounded for a moment, he gasps out your name, wondering suddenly if he’s gotten shot in the damn head again and is dreaming.

“Jack?” Swearing you could faint right there on the spot; you swallow down the panic crawling up your throat and try to quell the shock on your face. Of course it’s him. You see those eyes and that smile every single time you look at your daughter. “H—how…I mean…what—what are you doing here?” He has a box in those large hands that you used to know so well, and there are more crow’s feet around those questioning eyes, making you wonder if he came here intentionally. If that goddamn kit you did with Mallory might have sent him to your doorstep somehow. God, how did he get even more handsome? That’s not fair…

“Me? I – you live here?” Jack asks, trying to overcome his surprise at seeing you again. He can’t help but think you are still gorgeous.

“Just moved in.” Still in your work clothes and not yet dressed for comfort, you step outside and pull the front door mostly shut behind you. You can still hear inside if you need to, but this way Astro can’t make a break for it. “How did you find me?” After all, you had searched for years and never managed to find a single trace of him. Not that you knew much in the first place.

The truth is, he didn’t find you. He purposely never went looking for you, not wanting to see the life that he wasn’t a part of. He had been so messed up from Allita’s death, losing his unborn son, that he had vowed to never find that kind of love again. So when he had found himself missing you, he had sworn that he would never go looking. And he hadn’t. “I— uh, well—” Jack flashes you a small smile, as if it was just the most unusual thing. “I’m your neighbor.” He admits, turning to point to the townhouse right to your left. “Lived here for years. Did you— were you related to Mrs. Jones?”

There was a hopefulness alongside the worry in your heart that you hadn’t felt until just now – as it twists in your chest and extinguishes completely. He hadn’t found you at all — this was all an accident. “She was my grandmother.” You tell him honestly, winding your arms around yourself like a shield. “She left me the house when she died.” It was a generous gift, of course, and caused a small amount of family drama, but your grandmother’s will was specific: the West Village brownstone that she had lived in for almost her entire adult life was to go to you and Mallory. “You…uh…you knew her?”

“Not well.” Jack admits, shamefaced. “Work keeps me busy, but I would help her when she needed something moved or when the damn raccoon got trapped in her cans.” He reaches up and rubs the back of his neck, bowled over by the fact that he didn’t know his sweet, older neighbor was your grandmother. Remembering the box, he offers it to you. “Here, this was supposed to be a welcome to the neighborhood gift.” He tells you. “Meant to come introduce myself when you moved in, but – life.” He shrugs as if it’s not a big deal, his stomach clenching at your mere presence. Especially since he remembered there being a teen’s stuff among the moving boxes. He wants to ask about your husband, but he’s afraid he will hate the man on principle alone.

“Raccoon in the trash cans. Got it.” You nod vaguely, not even sure if you want to accept the otherwise very neighborly gift of whatever is in that box marked with a bakery’s logo. Your head is spinning and your throat is dry and you can swear you hear Mallory downstairs calling for you. “That’s—” But can you even bring yourself to explain? “I gotta go,” you mumble instead. The box has somehow made it into your hands, and you feel like a retreating wild animal fleeing the scene. “Thanks for stopping by, I guess.”

“Bye.” Jack stares after you for a moment, bewildered by how quickly you had turned and fled. The immediate happiness of seeing you again turns to confusion and then sours in his stomach. Wondering if you were upset with a past lover being so close to your family. Jack sighs and shoves his hands in pockets, turning around and walking down the steps. Maybe it was going to be better to just be those neighbors that didn’t speak.

The panic attack that comes as soon as you shut the door is not small, and it’s not something you can hide from your daughter when she comes running up the stairs at the sound of her mother crying. “Mom?” She bends down, taking both of your shoulders in her hands and checking you over the same way you used to do with her when she was small. “Who was it? What happened?”

“I—it—” You hiccup back more tears, trying to calm yourself down. “It’s fine, Mal. I’m fine. I just had a tough day at work.”

“That’s bullshit.” Proclaims your headstrong teenager, who has hopped up and grabbed her baseball bat from the umbrella stand by the front door. “You were in an amazing mood five minutes ago.” She’s faster than you, obviously, and pulls the door open to find whoever it was that upset her mother. The only person she sees is the next-door neighbor opening his front door and she fumes. “Hey Asshole!” She screams out, raising the bat.

“Mallory, stop!” You’re too late by a mere hair – unable to pull her back inside before Jack has made eye contact with his daughter.

Jack freezes, his entire body locking up and he couldn’t move if he wanted to. If he had been in danger, he’d be dead. Not that there isn’t significant danger from the teenager, an enraged expression on her face as she charges towards him with a baseball bat. Jesus…she…she looks like him. Jack staggers back slightly at the dark eyes, furious with the same calculating expression he’s seen in his own mirror. But what gets him – the ears. Her ears are curled back on the edges.

“Jesus fucking Christ.” Jack yelps, looking past her to where you are wide eyed with terror. “You had my kid?!”

It’s Mallory’s turn to freeze now – raised bat dropping to her side like cement as she looks at the man on his front step and then back at you. “Mom?” Her voice is small – almost scared – and you swear the last time she sounded so helpless, she was six years old.

“Everybody in the house.” You direct, in a voice that will not compromise. Waiting until Mallory has passed you and gone inside to look Jack square in the eyes. “I had my kid. You were nowhere to be found.”

Jack grinds his teeth, angry – furious that you had a fucking child and he didn’t know about it. “So that’s how it is?” He demands, the wounds that he had managed to start to close that month with you torn open, a bleeding mess on his heart. He has a child he never met – never knew existed – until she called him an asshole. “It wasn’t like you left a number for me to get up with you either.”

“At least you knew my last name.” You counter, clenching your jaw as he steps up to your front door for the second time. “I knew your first name, a dubious last name, and Kentucky. And it turns out that that not enough for a birth certificate.” All you can do in this moment is shake your head, the weight of fifteen years of missing him far outweighing any residual anger. It was a month, and you were only twenty-one. You had never considered that what you felt for him was real love, or that your life would be so completely changed. “Just…come inside and meet your daughter. Or don’t, if you don’t want to. But can we – please, I’m honestly asking – can we save being mad at each other for when she’s not around? She shouldn’t have to hear whatever you think of me.”

He stares at you for a moment and sighs, remembering that he ‘hadn’t’ given you his last name. Or – he had, but you had been convinced it was fake. And it wasn’t like Jack Daniels was a name people would honestly take seriously if inquiring about it. “I’m not mad.” Jack huffs and shakes his head. “Okay, I’m mad, but I’m more upset than anything.”

“You can be upset with me when she goes up to do her homework.” It’s the best you can offer, knowing that Mallory deserves honesty and truth as much as either you or Jack does. “I’ll take whatever you’ve got to throw at me. But…none of it is Mallory’s fault. She’s innocent.”

“Her name is Mallory?” He’s quiet, still trying to process all of this. He’s also a little hurt there’s you think he’s going to punish a child for something she had nothing to do with.

“Mallory Paige.” When you step back inside, the teenager in question is sitting on the bottom of the stairs that lead to the second floor with her cat in her arms and the bat nowhere to be found. “And her best friend there is Astro.”

Mallory is practically beside herself when you close the door, looking between you and Jack with so many questions that she doesn’t know where to start. Well – yes she does. Her mouth is just so dry that she can barely get the words out. “Is…is he…really my dad?”

“Yes, honey.” You sigh softly and nod your head, both hands shoving into your pants pockets nervously. “This is Jack.”

Jack stares at her for a long moment. So many things, different traits from you, from him, have made such a beautiful young woman. He wants to touch her, to make sure she’s real, but he’s a stranger to her. “Jack Daniels.” He tells her quietly. “You have my ears.” The twitch of his mustache is a small smile, pleased and nervous.

“And eyes. And smile.” Mallory nods, her voice as quiet as his is. “I mean…I think. At least…that’s what mom says…” She hasn’t really seen much of a smile from the man in the three minutes she’s known him, so she can’t tell.

“Yeah?” That does make Jack grin, rocking back on his heels and looking between you and Mallory. “I still say you look like your momma. Thank the good Lord. Least you don’t have my nose.”

“Why don’t you stay for dinner?” The offer is an olive branch to Jack, since you were already planning on cooking and it’s that time of day. “Maybe we can all talk while I’m cooking?”

“Only if you are okay with it.” Jack looks back over at you again, aware that you are not happy with him and his reaction to the news. He wasn’t exactly proud of it, but he also knows you don’t know the full truth of why he was single when the two of you met.

You’re not entirely sure if you are okay, but being heartsick isn’t an excuse to deprive them of knowing each other now that they have a chance. You try for a smile instead, finding it’s waterier than you’re proud of, and you pick up the bakery box from the side table where you had managed to leave it before nearly collapsing in the entry way just a few minutes ago. “Mal got an A on her first Spanish quiz of the year and we finally finished unpacking. We’re celebrating with chicken parmesan.”

“Nice.” Jack nods in approval and looks over at Mallory. “You like chicken parm? It’s one of my favorites.” He doesn’t know what to do, or what to say so he nods towards the bakery box. “That place has the best cookies and Danishes around. I brought you quite a few of them.”

“Mom makes the best.” Mallory takes the box from your hands as the three of you troop down the stairs to the kitchen. “Chicken parm, I mean. Not cookies. Mom’s cookies are like rocks.”

“Hey!” You groan, huffing a little at being ratted out so early in this conversation. “They’re not always rocks.”

“Nah.” Mallory laughs and grins at the man who is apparently her father. Now that she’s had it pointed out, she can see her ears on him, and even her crooked smile. “Sometimes we just eat the dough so you can’t ruin them.”

“I have been known to eat cookie dough myself.” Jack chuckles. “I buy those Tollhouse logs and it’s me and a spoon when I’m feeling the sweet tooth.” He bites his lip. “When’s your birthday, kiddo?”

“March 30.” Mallory sets the bakery box down on the counter when she reaches the kitchen and goes to the refrigerator to retrieve the bottle of iced tea there along with three glasses. “I, uh…I know about Mexico,” she admits quietly, looking over at you. “Mom told me some stuff.”

“She asked me a few years ago why she didn’t have a dad.” It hadn’t been the first time she had asked, but it was the first time you felt that she was old enough to hear some of the truth. “So I told her about how we dated for a little while and then I couldn’t find you to tell you that I was pregnant.” You really and truly cannot busy yourself enough right now, and you are pulling out pans and groceries like a fiend. Anything to not look at him. “I tried for a long time.” And nearly gave a lot of different men named Jack Daniels heart attacks in the process – it had been shocking enough to find out that real men even had that name that it had given you hope, but you never found your Jack.

Dated for a little while. A very innocent term for the month-long torrid affair the two of you had. A month of exploring the locale and each other, you practically living in his cabana when you felt like a third wheel with your friends. “Sorry about that.” He winces and regrets his decision to never look you up. “It can be hard to find me, unless you know the right people.” The intelligence agency he worked for made sure of it.

“Great-gran’s probably laughing.” Mallory predicts, holding out a tall glass of peach iced tea to him. “She loved weird coincidences and Shakespearean stuff.”

“Hmmm.” He doesn’t know much about coincidences, but he has to meddling friend who seems to know everything. “She was a nice lady.”

“So, Jack.” As much as she wants to just dive in, Mallory has never called anyone ‘dad’ and never thought she would. “What do you do? Please tell me it’s cool. Mom’s job is so boring.”

Jack chuckles and shakes his head, knowing that he can’t divulge too much right now. “I work for Statesman. The whiskey company.” He gives her a small shrug. “Acting CEO.”

“You run a booze company?” The teen is clearly delighted, leaning over the kitchen counter where you’ve buried your face in your cooking. “Does that mean I can drink whiskey, Mom? Since it’s like…my birthright or whatever?”

You snort, shaking your head at her. “I’ll buy you the fanciest bottle they make in six and a half years, kiddo. It can be your first legal bottle.”

Jack snorts and doesn’t say a word when Mallory pouts. He’s not going to go against what you say. He’s not crazy.

“You can have one sip if there is ever an open bottle in the house.” Caving when all she does is pout isn’t a good habit, but you don’t like to make things forbidden to her. That makes them mysterious and desirable, and she’s more likely to go behind your back to get it or end up overdoing it. “But that’s it. And we’re not buying a bottle just so you can try it.”

“Yesssss.” Mallory does a small celebration dance before trying to collect herself and look well behaved. “I just want to know,” she explains, eyes gliding back to Jack in embarrassment. “I don’t…know that much about you…”

“Ask me anything you want.” Some things couldn’t be mentioned of course, but as soon as Jack leaves your house tonight, he will be on the phone to Champ. “I’ll answer as honestly as I can.” He wants to offer to help, he’s pretty handy in a kitchen, but you seem to be trying to avoid looking at him. Busying yourself with everything and he doesn’t want to make things even more difficult.

“Do you have another family?” Mallory’s face is screwed up into an expression of determination, meant to mask the fact that what she’s asking is actually her biggest fear. The one that cruel kids taunted and tormented her with mercilessly and has made her glad to leave previous towns she had once loved or considered home. “Is that why you left Mom?”

“Mal!” There is no amount of squeezing your eyes shut or deep breathing that can undo the fact that your daughter just asked that question, and you set down the block of parmesan you were grating carefully. “Just because he said you can ask questions doesn’t mean you can be rude.”

“It’s okay.” Jack assures you, giving Mallory a bittersweet smile. “I don’t have another family.” He admits softly, licking his lips before he decides to explain. “When I met your mom, I had lost my wife and unborn son two years earlier.”

“Oh…” You can feel your shoulders round, stomach flopping and face drawn in sympathy. “I’m so sorry, Jack.” You didn’t know. How could you? The two of you had done nothing but live in moments of passion and pleasure the entire time you were together. The insulated bubble of your fantasy affair had had no room for reality.

“You didn’t know.” He jerks his shoulder up, one careless shrug although his entire stance is anything but careless. “It wasn’t something I was…able to talk about.” He admits. Hell, it was hard to talk about it now, but that was after a lot of therapy. He looks back over at Mallory. “So no, there’s no secret family.”

“So then why did you leave?” She asks, her voice quiet and tinged with embarrassment. “Why didn’t you want to see Mom anymore?” The whole ships passing in the night explanation seemed like a bullshit adult excuse to her, but she had never thought that she would have an opportunity to actually ask him.

Jack sighs, leaning against the counter and looking at the daughter he should have known about. “Because I was afraid.” It shocks him when the truth comes out if his mouth. “I— when my wife died – it nearly killed me.” He looks down at his boot, scuffing it on the tile floor. “Your mom, I knew that she was special, but I was terrified that I would lose her somehow.” He chokes out a harsh laugh. “Hard to lose someone when you don’t have them, right?”

“I guess.” It’s hard for her to grasp, but she nods slowly before looking down at Astro between her feet and frowns. “I’m gonna feed the cat.” She announces without segue. “Don’t say anything important until I get back.” She’s gone in a flash, with Astro yowling at her heels as he chases her up to the main floor where his bowls and food are. The air in the room seems to get sucked out after her, though, and your shoulders sag at the counter while you try to figure out what the hell to even say.

“I’m sorry.” Jack props his elbows on the counter and leans over it, closing his eyes with a huge sigh of regret. “I didn’t— I wasn’t trying to attack you.” He mumbles. “I just honestly never thought I would have a kid after… and then I find out…” He breaks off the comment with a choked sound.

“I’m sorry. I tried for so long and then it seemed like you just didn’t want to be found which is so stupid and I just—” With both of you speaking at once it’s sort of a jumble of apologies, but you shake your head fiercely and wipe your hands on the nearest kitchen towel. “All she’s ever wanted is to know you. You don’t have to be any more involved than you want to be and I’m not going to ask you for money or anything, but…” You shrug your shoulders and lean across the counter so that you’re shoulder to shoulder. “It would be nice if you wanted to come around sometimes. Get to know her a little?”

“I—” Jack turns towards you, his eyes swimming with emotion. “We have a daughter.” He breathes out in awe.

“My birth control wasn’t quite as strong as we thought,” you joke, even though the water in his eyes is bringing tears to your own that make your throat stick and your shoulders feel heavy.

“Darlin’ if I had known….” His eyes close and he sighs, hanging his head. “I didn’t want to find out what you were doing.” He admits softly. “I didn’t want to see you married to some asshole with two point five perfect kids and a dog, so I never looked.”

“Just one perfect kid.” That feeling of being drawn closer to him is so familiar that you could swear it was just yesterday that you were lying in his arms on the beach in Puerto Vallarta. “And the cat. But he can be a jerk if he doesn’t get his breakfast on time.”

“Was it…hard?” He can’t imagine having to raise a child on his own. “Doing it alone? Did you have family to help you?”

“It wasn’t easy.” This close to him, it’s hard not to want to reach out and touch him. You haven’t allowed yourself to, not wanting to know if that magnetism that had existed fifteen years ago is still there. “But my family helped where they could. We lived with my parents for a long time before heading out on our own when Mal was about eight. At that point I could afford to support us on my own.” You sigh softly, watching your hand inch closer to him of its own accord. “Sometimes I wonder if anything I do is remotely right at all, but she’s turning out amazing all on her own.”

“She was going to take on a full-grown man with a baseball bat.” He chuckles before he cocks his head. “What was that about?”

“I—” If it’s possible, you deflate a little further. “She heard me crying after I shut the door,” you admit, staring down at your hands. “And she’s never taken it lightly when I get upset. I guess…” The thought would make you laugh if you weren’t nearly in tears again, and the sound you make is more like a hiccup. “I guess she’s a hell of a lot more protective than I thought. Just be glad she didn’t swing. The kid has a hell of an arm on her.”

Jack snorts and feels pride swelling in his chest at the notion that his daughter would ferociously protect her mother from anyone. “She wouldn’t have hurt me.” He promises, edging closer to you and unable to deny that he wants to touch you, pull you in and inhale you. To see if that scent that was always underlying any perfume – your scent – was still the same.

“She would have tried.” When he shifts closer, the tips of your fingers brush his arm, and you inhale sharply. Apparently, that spark hasn’t faded over time. At least not for you. And you’re not sure if that’s what you were hoping for or dreading. After all, the idea that he might still want you fifteen years later is…well, it’s wishful thinking.

“Good.” The air has shift. Thickened. If it weren’t for the fact that this is not a mission and you are not a target, he would think that someone is about to attack. Maybe they are. “Fuck.” He whispers, looking into your eyes. “I should have stayed.” He murmurs. “I shoulda told Champ to send someone else.”

“Champ?” You feel like you can barely move, fingertips touching his skin and breath mingling between you like no time has passed at all.

“My boss.” Jack straightens up, bringing you with him. “Darlin’, tell me I’m crazy.” He begs softly. “Tell me to step away, or I’m gonna kiss you.”

“I’ve never been known for my good sense when it comes to you.” The two of you are so wrapped up in your own little world as you round the edge of the counter to be closer to him, that you don’t even hear the soft creak of the stairs as Mallory stops in her tracks to give you privacy. “I just…I don’t…” Don’t isn’t very convincing when you’re practically gliding into his arms, and you force yourself to stop – closing your eyes briefly and breathing slowly before you open your eyes again to find his gaze still locked on you. “Don’t do it unless you mean it,” you ask, barely hearing your own voice. “Letting go of you once was hard enough.”

Jack sighs, heavy and deep for the pit of his soul. “I’ve always thought of you.” He confesses softly. “You – being out there, kept me sane sometimes. Thinking about that month, wondering what you had become.” He leans in and nudges his nose against yours. “You seeing anyone, darlin’?”

“No.” You haven’t for years, essentially giving up on dating when no one could ever come close to making you feel the way that Jack did. The way he still does, apparently, with your arms sliding easily around his waist. “No one ever…I-I couldn’t stop comparing them to you…which felt pretty silly until about ten seconds ago.”

“That’s good.” There’s a cockiness to his smirk as he leans in again. “Because you were always the bar no one could reach.”

If being able to touch him again took your breath away, then it’s surely a natural progression that kissing him for the first time in fifteen years makes your heart stop. That part of you that never stopped being in love with him is soaring right now as you curl your fingers into his shirt and hold his softer form flush against you. You’re both older, softer, changed in both large and small ways – but Jack tastes exactly the same as he did so many years ago. He still overwhelms and fills your senses in exactly the same way, and the reassurance that you haven’t been glorifying his memory for fifteen years is enough to have you eagerly seeking to deepen the kiss.

Kissing you was always natural. From the first time on that little dance floor, crowded and sweaty, to right now. He’s been no saint since the two of you parted ways, but there have only been two women that fit into his arms like they were made for him. Now one of them is right here. Jack groans and eagerly slides his tongue into your mouth as you open for him.

You moan softly, pouring the sound into his mouth as the two of you relearn the contours of each other’s mouths and grip the curves of each other’s bodies, lost in the moment in the middle of your kitchen. Years ago, a kiss like this would have had your back up against a wall or tree or door and your dress pulled up to your waist so Jack could push inside you as slowly or as frantically as he pleased – but it builds more slowly tonight. Reminding yourselves of exactly how good things can be.

Maybe its age that’s slowing him down, or maybe it’s that he doesn’t want this to end, but Jack doesn’t rush. Which is a good thing when he sees movement out of the corner of his vision and he pulls away hastily, remembering you do have a teenage daughter in the house.

“I…um…” With your entire face on fire and your body lit up with that desperate, aching need for pleasure for the first time in years, you’re relieved to only see Astro when you turn your head. But a creak on the stairs makes you nearly laugh; you bury your face in your hands for a moment before taking a deep breath. “Mal? You can come out of hiding.”

“I didn’t want to interrupt.” Mallory is chewing on her bottom lip when she emerges, hands stuffed into her pockets and looking sheepish. “It sounded like you guys were talking about something important…” For her entire life she’s dreamed about her dad reappearing and her parents getting back together – wanting that idyllic life of domestic harmony like other kids had and so her mom could be happy. And it sounds like she might actually get it. Or at least she’s a huge step closer than she was even an hour ago.

“Sorry, kiddo.” Jack has the decency to flush at his daughter having to deal with him kissing her mom the first time he meets her. “I didn’t mean to rush that.”

“Does…” Mallory looks between you with poorly disguised hope in her eyes, settling the question on Jack when she recognizes the look on your face as uncertainty. “Does this mean you’re getting back together?”

“I—” Jack looks back at you and then to Mallory again. “That is up to your mom.” He hums softly. “It’s been a long time since she’s had to put up with me.” Flashing a grin at the joke to dispel the tension. You might not want something with him. “She might not want ‘ole Jack.”

“Yes, she does,” Mallory insists quickly. “She—”

“Mal.” You have a feeling that if you don’t stop her, a whole lot of teenage observations will come spilling out of her mouth and you’re not sure how ready you are for any of those truths to be spoken. “Your dad and I have a lot to talk about. How about for now we just set the table and I’ll finish making dinner?” A glance at Jack gets you a nod, and you squeeze his hand gently in your own before letting go. There is a lot to talk about, but having him back beside you has always been your ultimate fantasy.

Instead of haunting you, he helps Mallory. Letting her order him around as the two of them get the table ready to eat. It’s homey and comforting, something he’s not imagined for himself in forever. Learning that his daughter has his observation skills is amusing, along with your artistic side. The flowers that had been on the entry way table magically appearing on the table in a recreated centerpiece. “So, what other questions do you have for me?” He asks her, knowing she wants to know more. He’s already soaking up information about the first fourteen years that’s he’s missed.

“I looked you up when I was feeding Astro.” She admits, holding up her cell phone as she connects her Spotify to the Bluetooth speakers she got for her last birthday to play some music during dinner. “All I could find was your company bio. Born and raised in Kentucky, worked for the company for twenty years, blah blah blah, all that kind of stuff.” Mallory tilts her head at him as she turns on a Florence and the Machine playlist – her favourite that you also love – and shrugs. “What do you do for fun?”

Jack hums, knowing that his main ‘hobby’ is work. “Rope work.” He decides that’s safe enough. “Plus a little sport shooting. I am handy with a whip, a lasso and six shooters.”

Mallory’s nose wrinkles slightly, confusion evident on her face, and she squints at him like she’s inspecting him for a lie. “Didn’t cowboys die out like a hundred years ago?”

Jack chuckles and shakes his head. “Naw, they’re still out there. Just have to know where to look.”

“It was always kind of your dad’s thing.” And despite the distractingly neat button-down shirt and typically tight jeans he’s wearing, you had noticed that he still wears cowboy boots regardless of living in New York City. “He was the only one walking the beach in boots instead of sandals.”

Jack grins at the way Mallory wrinkles her nose and reaches out to tweak it. “Soft soles.” He huffs. “Sand burned my feet.”

You soundly resist the joke about how that was the only soft part of him back then, and instead hand Jack a bowl brimming with spaghetti in garlicky tomato sauce to put on the table while you bring over the platter of chicken. “How long have you been in New York?”

“Six years.” Jack brings over the bowl and sets it down. “Champ wanted me running the New York office. Knowing I liked to play the stock games.”

“Everybody dig in.” Seeing him sitting at your dinner table like he’s always meant to be there is disorienting in the best kind of way. Like you’ve imagined him and wished him into being there for so long that it finally worked. The whole thing will be enough to make you break right down and cry tonight, but for now you’re going to savor it, and hold on to that fresh feeling of his lips against yours for as long as you can.

It’s quiet for a moment while everyone fills up their plates. Jack keeps looking between you and Mallory, wondering what it would have been like if he had kept in touch, if he had known about her. “We should do something.” He decides. “Some kind of family outing?”

“Can we?” The suggestion energizes your daughter, making her sit up straight in her seat enthusiastically as she digs into her dinner. “There’s a bunch of touristy stuff we want to do since we just got here. Yankees game, Broadway, the Met, Times Square, all the super touristy stuff.”

“Whatever you want to do.” Jack nods. “As long as your mother is okay with me playing your guide.”

“I think there’s something you should do first, though.” Mallory tells him honestly. “You and Mom should go out. Even if it’s not like…a date date. You should spend time together.”

He stares at his daughter for a moment before he chuckles and shakes his head before he looks at you. “I think she’s trying to orchestrate something, but she’s probably right.”

“I shouldn’t have let her watch Parent Trap so many times,” you huff, raising an eyebrow at Mallory as she gives you her best innocent face. “It wouldn’t kill us to have dinner.” There are certainly plenty of things to discuss that aren’t for your fourteen-year-old’s ears, especially after that kiss. “It doesn’t—don’t feel like it has to be a date. We should just take some time to catch up.” The last thing you want him to feel is pressured, no matter how much you were ready to drag him upstairs not too long ago.

“No.” Jack braces his elbows on the edge of the table, that kiss making him confident that you are still feeling the same way you did all those years ago. “I owe you fifteen years of Mother’s Day celebrations. And I want to see if we are still compatible.”

Mallory looks positively triumphant with her mouth full of pasta, and you look at Jack for a long moment before nodding. “Okay.” It’s not exactly hard to agree to, since that kiss screamed compatibility. “Mal’s old enough to stay home alone, so…yeah. I’d like that. Just – let me know when and where.”

“You could always go out tonight!” Mallory chirps. “After dinner. It’s early and this is New York.” Jack bites his lip to keep from laughing at the face of unbridled enthusiasm.

“Your dad might have other plans, honey.” After all, who knows what kind of life he’s leading these days. He had asked you if you were seeing anyone, but you hadn’t had the presence of mind to ask the same.

“I don’t.” Jack supplies quickly. “But your mom may not want to do anything tonight.” He offers, giving you an out of you want it. “It’s been a shocking day.”

“What the hell.” You laugh, shrugging at the absurdity of the entire day on whole. An extremely eventful Thursday if there ever was one. “Why not? The house will be nice and quiet while Mal does her homework.”

He hadn’t expected you to say yes, but he flashes you a grin and nods. “Well, okay darlin’. How’s a stroll through Central Park sound?” He asks. “They have a lot of musicians out in the evenings.”

“Sounds good.” Nothing formal, nothing fussy, and nothing that will be too upsetting to Mal if it doesn’t go well. That seems okay to you.

******

Jack insists on cleaning up the dishes, shooing you away to go get ready and claiming that Mallory can help him if he needs guidance on where to put things. “You know,” he keeps his eyes on the pan he is scrubbing. “You momma may not want to pursue anything with me.” He tells her. “But that don’t mean that you and I aren’t going to get to know one another.” He just doesn’t want her to push for the two of you because she wants to keep him in her life. That was guaranteed the moment he learned about her. Living next door just makes it even easier.

“She misses you.” Mallory dries the glasses and flatware carefully to put away, watching her father as he works. “I know that having me isn’t a guarantee that you’ll get married and live happily ever after. I get that.” She shrugs a little, leaning on the counter and looking up at him. “But she never asks for anything for herself, and I know she wouldn’t ask you for anything either. So…whatever happens is whatever happens. I just don’t want her to regret shit anymore.”

“Damn.” Jack shoots her a grin and looks back down at his pan. “Seems like you inherited my spirit.” He tells her. “Brash, fearsome and reason to fight when it’s something you believe in or want to protect.”

“Mom says we’re a lot alike.” She puts the clean glasses in the cupboard and offers him a small, devious grin. “At least, that’s what she said when I frustrate her by talking my way out of trouble.”

His laugh is full, from the belly and he practically crows at how pleased with herself she looks. “I could always get her madder than a hen having her eggs stolen and then soothe her ruffled feathers.”

“I don’t—” Mallory chews her lip, plopping down on the stool on the other side of the counter to look at him. There are only a few old Polaroids in a shoebox in her mom’s room that she had ever seen him in, and he looks pretty much the same. Just older and all the things that go with age. “I don’t think she ever stopped loving you,” she murmurs, eyes shifting away to look at her own hands the same way you do when you’re nervous or upset. “I mean she’s never said it or anything, but I don’t know why else she would’ve avoided dating like she did.”

Oh. Jack’s shoulders slump and he looks at the daughter the two of you created from a vacation fling. “I—I promise I won’t hurt her.” He vows softly, knowing that she cares about your happiness.

“Okay.” Mallory nods, having said all she has to say for the moment until she remembers one more thing while putting the flatware back in its drawer. “Did you…” she looks back at him apprehensively. “Ever love her?”

“I did.” He murmurs softly. “It’s why I couldn’t be with her. At least why I thought I couldn’t.” His grief over his wife had twisted him and warped his thoughts on love for awhile. “There have been two women I’ve loved, and your mother is one of them.”

******

It took you a solid twenty minutes of staring in your bedroom mirror panicking over not having anything nice enough to wear out on a maybe-but-maybe-not date with the man who fathered your child. You manage to calm yourself down enough to transfer your energy to a pep talk – reminding yourself that you’re just going for a walk and the whole point of this is just to casually spend time together so just put on some damn jeans and a clean blouse and fucking breathe. Is this the first night you’ve refreshed your makeup after work instead of wiping it off in exhaustion? Yes. But you’ll be damned if you don’t go on this totally casually absolutely not-a-big-deal walk and not look nice for the man you – begrudgingly admit to yourself – have been in love with for fifteen years. You just can’t let yourself get your hopes up. Even as good as that kiss was.

Heading back downstairs, you check yourself in the hallway mirror one more time and stop to give Astro a snuggle when you grab your favourite cardigan off the coat hook by the front door. “Knock knock.” Deciding to announce yourself when you get to the bottom of the stairs in case Mallory and Jack are talking about something one of them might consider personal, you pause in the kitchen doorway before turning the corner. “How’s clean up coming?”

Jack is wiping his hands on the dish rag as he turns around. “Done.” He manages before he purses his lips together and lets out a low whistle. “Darlin’, maybe I need to go freshen up to be worthy of walking you around.” He praises as he sets down the towel and takes a step towards you.

“It’s just jeans and a clean shirt, Jack.” Still, that doesn’t stop the warmth from rising in your cheeks, pleased at the praise without letting yourself visibly preen. Not in front of Mal.

He grins, rocking closer and catching a subtle whiff of perfume. “Everything looks good on you, remember?”

“Yeah, yeah.” You roll your eyes at him like you don’t distinctly remember that he used to end that phrase with things like ’especially me’ or ’even nothing’, or look smug about it after painting your skin with his cum. “I remember.”

“You kids have fun, now.” Mallory grins, echoing what you always say to her when you would drop her off at a friend’s house. “Doors will stay locked, no tv until my homework is done, lights out by 11:30, I know the drill.” She practically shoves the two of you toward the kitchen door looking as pleased with herself as humanly possible. “You two stay out as looooong as you want.”

“Why do I have a feeling your daughter wants you on this date more than you want to be on it?” Jack asks as the two of you find yourselves on the stoop.

“That’s not true.” Outside, out of view of your daughter, you feel like you can breathe a little more easily. If only because the baggage you carry is full of things that you try never to shoulder her with. “I’m just…I’ve had a lot of dreams that start with you walking back into our lives and I don’t want to pressure you into anything. That’s all.” Taking a deep breath, you nudge him slightly as you head for the few stairs that will bring you to the sidewalk. “I know she has her hopes up. But you’ve had a lot dropped on you today even before our teenage daughter decided to play matchmaker.” Holding your hand out to him as though it’s proof that you want to be there, you offer him a smile. “For me? I just can’t believe you’re actually here.”

Jack takes your hand, feeling the weight of your fingers resting against his and the warmth of your skin. “I regretted it.” He admits quietly. “Not getting your information, or leaving you a way to get ahold of me if you wanted.” He shakes his head. “I know I didn’t tell you about my wife, I couldn’t.”

“I feel like I should have worked harder to find you, but I tried everything I could think of.” The two of you start down the street together, easily finding that stride together like it hasn’t been more than a decade since you walked hand in hand. “Things would have been so different.”

Jack grunts, fully aware that without a Top Secret clearance, you wouldn’t have been able to find him. “Darlin’, there’s a reason why you weren’t able to find me.” He ventures, squeezing your hand. He knows Champ might be sore at him, but you are the mother of his child. His family legacy. You would find out when he dies, and family who are together get to know.

“What do you mean?” There aren’t many people out right now, or at least a lot fewer than you would have expected for the time of night, and you and Jack stride slowly down the block together even with confusion written on your face.

“Statesman isn’t just a whiskey company, darlin’.” Jack explains. “Beyond the bourbon, we’re an independent intelligence agency.” He looks over to see you frowning even harder in confusion. “I’m a spy, sweetheart.”

Stopping dead in your tracks, it takes every ounce of restraint you have not to just wrench your hand out of his and do something rash like scream. “Jack, if you don’t want to be in our lives, just say so,” you tell him, carefully removing your fingers from their place threaded through his. It feels like you’ve swallowed concrete, the sinking disappointment in your belly pulling you away from him a little more every second. “You don’t have to lie.”

“I’m not lying.” Jack huffs, reaching for you but dropping his hand when you jerk out if his reach. “I’m – hand to God, I am an intelligence officer. Was one when we met.”

“Spies don’t work for distilleries; they work for the government and you are the least likely military man I’ve ever met in my life.” The boiling frustration pouring off of you pushes tears to the surface as you wrap your arms around yourself and shake your head emphatically. “How in the hell am I supposed to believe you, Jack?” It’s like a comic book, too far beyond belief to even entertain. “Is Jack even your name? Or was I right that Jack Daniels was an alias the whole time?” It’s a silly name and you’ve always thought so. Thought he was hiding something. But you went and fell in love with him anyway like a fool.

His lips push into a frown, and he shakes his head. “Come on.” He turns around and starts walking back the same direction you just traveled from. “I’ll prove it since you can’t take my word for it.” He tells himself as he walks with large, determined strides that anyone would have that reaction. Although he had hoped you would ask questions rather than just disbelieve him.

“I guess I’m following you.” Muttering to yourself as you watch him start to walk away, you’re torn between the absolute heartbreak of finally thinking that he truly wants nothing to do with you and being concerned that he might not be well. The percentage possibility that he’s telling the truth is so slim that you immediately push it from your mind. Despite clearly not believing him, you hustle behind the man you were supposed to be taking a nice stroll with until he’s climbing the stairs to his own brownstone right next to yours.

From the outside, Jack’s brownstone looks normal. He opens the outer door and moves over to the wall next to the door. Turning around and making sure you are paying attention before he leans down to peer into the small round orb that looks like a digital thermostat on the wall. Initiating the retinal scan.

“The hell…?” Sheer curiosity has you stepping closer, looking at the panel that he’s staring into but looks like something out of a James Bond movie.

The interior door to the house clicks open and Jack shoves it open so you can walk in. “It’s in my library.” He tells you, leading the way through the wax rubbed paneled hallway and through the original pocket doors into the cozy room.

His house is built exactly the same way as yours, the whole block having been built at the same time well over a hundred years ago, but his library is much grander. Yours is low key at the moment, and is mostly a place for you to read or Mallory to play her guitar. “What is?” You ask, not seeing anything suspicious or out of place in the comfortable space.

When he had moved into the brownstone, he had told the techs that he wanted all the Statesman upgrades to blend into the natural feel of the house. Beyond the retinal scanner, they had done a damn good job. Jack walks over to a bookshelf and presses a button that is hidden in the ornate carving.

A whole panel of the wall starts to move, sinking inward slightly before shifting and sliding to the left so that part of his bookcase gives way to a… “Do you seriously have a wall of weapons?” There are guns of various calibers hanging alongside what looks to be a lasso and a whip like he mentioned earlier. Jesus Christ, you had always just thought he was really into growing up on a ranch…

Jack picks up what looks like just a whip handle, short and practically useless to the common person. “Back up.” He warns you, pressing the well-worn button on the handle as the electrified whip extends and flickers to life, deadly and beautiful.

“The hell?” Stepping back wasn’t quite enough, and you stumble backward a large step more before you steady yourself on a nearby chair. “Is that…electric?” You ask, eyes wide with awe and somehow more confusion.

Jack keeps his eyes on his weapon, knowing it can slice anything in half and he doesn’t want to accidentally hurt you. The vase, however, he never really liked it. He swings the whip over his head and flicks his wrist, sending the electrified cord out to wrap around the neck of the vase and flowers, neatly slicing them off and letting them topple to the floor. Straightening up when he’s done, he presses the button again and the whip retracts. “It is.” He finally answers, turning back to you.

“Jesus!” Instinctively jumping backward to be even further away from the weapon, you can feel all the blood drain from your face and your jaw drops open in shock. “What—how did—I don’t—” A coherent thought doesn’t seem to be able to form for an exhaustive amount of time and you stand there, dumbfounded, for longer than you’re proud of. “You’re—you’re serious, aren’t you?”

Jack sets the whip down and nods, aware that there is probably a good chance that you will flee. Perhaps keep him away from Mallory. “I wasn’t lying to you, darlin’. I’ve never lied to you. Maybe kept things to myself – like why I was in Mexico – but I never lied.”

“Wh—why were you in Mexico?” It’s overwhelming, and confusing, but your gut is somehow sure that he’s telling you the truth – which might only be adding to the feeling of confusion, you can’t tell yet. “You just said you were on vacation…?”

“I was in a sense.” Jack nods, relaxing slightly now that you are asking questions. The reluctant belief in your eyes making him shuffle slightly closer to you. “I had just finished my first mission. Those bruises you saw weren’t from a bar fight in Jamaica – well, not just a bar fight.” He admits. “I was in Mexico to recuperate and lay low. And celebrate mission success.”

“So you—” Shaking your head only seems to rattle your thoughts more, and you look between him and the secret wall panel of weapons (is that really just a thought you just had?) apprehensively. “You’re like…James Bond with a Stetson?” The phrase is so ridiculous that it almost makes you laugh, but all that comes out is a breathy huff. “Just…going around the world on secret spy missions and sleeping with random women and pretending to sell whiskey?”

“No, I do sell whiskey.” Jack flashes you a grin and lifts his hand to rub through his hatless hair. “Have you seen our stock? As the senior agent, I’m not seducing as much as I might have when I was younger. And I go out on missions only when the young bucks can’t get it done alone.”

You have far, far too many questions all swimming around in your head right now, but the way he’s looking at you is so earnest that you swallow – hard – and look back over at him. “So, what…I couldn’t find you because Jack Daniels is your code name or something?”

“No.” Jack shakes his head and grins at you. “Jack Daniels really is my name.” He tells you. “It’s more that Ginger keeps records of me classified.” He chuckles. “My code name is Whiskey.”

“Of course it is.” With both of your hands waving in the air, you flop backward into the chair you were just leaning on. “I—this is…it’s kind of insane,” you admit, trying to wrap your head around the completely far-fetched idea.

“I’ll admit that.” Jack places the whip back into the panel and slides it closed. “But that’s why you couldn’t find me.” He murmurs softly. “If you decide you don’t want to have anything to do with it, that’s fine.” He would be heartbroken, but that’s not a new sensation.

“If all this were true—” The hurt look on his face makes you pause, and you pinch the bridge of your nose tightly between two fingers. “Let’s say this is all true,” you rephrase. “Wouldn’t you get in a ton of trouble for telling me?”

“Maybe.” Jack can still see that you don’t want to believe him. “Let’s find out.” He opens up a drawer in his desk and tosses you a pair of reading glasses, keeping one for himself. “Put those on, darlin’.”

Sure. A pair of glasses will tell him if he’s in trouble with his super spy bosses. Makes sense. You’re just about willing to admit that your weary heart can’t take a bunch of elaborate lies, but that insistent nagging in your gut tells you to put the damn glasses on and just find out. The image in them is almost instant, as he puts his own pair on and taps the tip of the frames like he’s pushing an On button or something.

“Jack! Burnin’ that midnight oil there?” An older man, broad like Jack but with perhaps ten or fifteen years on him and possessed of a thicker accent, appears in front of your eyes with a cigar in his mouth and a surprised smile on his face that quickly drops into concern. “Jack…” He clears his throat purposefully. “Now, I don’t mind there bein’ a beautiful woman in my office, but I prefer it when they’re by my own invitation.”

“Sorry Champ.” Jack motions towards you and introduces you. “There’s been a development here in New York.”

“Oh?” Champ raises a brow and sets down the cigar, then turns to reach for a bottle of Statesman Reserve. “What seems to be the problem? Nothings coming from the White House.”

Jack shakes his head. “No. This is more of a personal thing.” He explains. “Aww hell, there’s no good way to explain this, Champ. This lady is the mother of my fourteen-year-old daughter that I just learned about.”

Champ pauses, the bottle in his hand poised to pour, and he carefully sets it back down on the desk in front of him. “Ma’am,” he nods to you before looking back at Jack with a sigh. “When I told you to take a little R&R after the Jamaica job, this ain’t really what I meant, son.”

“I know.” Jack barely manages to keep from rolling his eyes, but he does huff. “However, now that I am aware of this, we need to initiate ‘Family Protocol’ for them.” He reminds his boss.

“Ginger’s already got everything set up, she’s just waiting on my go ahead.” Champ admits, leaning forward at his desk. “Ma’am, I understand this must come as a bit of a shock to you, but rest assured you’re in good hands, alright? Ol’ Jack’s the best in the business and we’ll take good care of you.”

“Uh…” The best you can do is nod, bewildered, and reach for Jack’s hand to cling to. As insane as this is, he’s still your port in the storm. “I—okay.”

“Wait…” Jack’s nostrils flair. “How does Ginger already have everything set up?” He demands, fully aware that those kinds of things take time.

“About a week ago, your DNA got pinged in our system—”

“The ancestry kits.” You interrupt, now wide eyed over something completely different. “A couple of weeks ago Mal and I each did one of those ancestry kits where you spit in a tube and the company analyzes your DNA…she hated not being able to fill out those school projects they have the kids do about family history and I—I thought—it could help us find out about where your family came from.”

“And you didn’t think it would be a good idea to let me know?” Jack asks, incredulous that Champ and Ginger would keep this from him.

“I was havin’ Ginger put together a file for you.” Champ admits, picking up the bottle again to pour himself a drink. “Same as we have done for any other agent.” It had happened a few times over the years, but never like this. The existence of those dang DNA tests was turning out to be interesting for the intelligence community. “But that file can be sealed now, since y’all found each other.” His eyes trace between you and Jack for a moment as he takes a sip of his drink. “Why don’t you bring your lady friend and your daughter down to Kentucky on the jet this weekend and we’ll get them squared away. Some of the New York techs can update their home security while you’re here.”

He’s still slightly upset, knowing that Champ knew first-hand about Jack’s past and how it shaped him. Although he can’t be too upset about him withholding information until it was deemed safe. It was the nature of the game he played. Turning to you, he wants to know what you think. “Darlin’?” He asks softly. “It’s your decision.”

“What are ’Family Protocols’?” It was the phrase that Jack had used, but you have no idea what it means and frankly it sounds more threatening than protective to your ears. “And why do we need to update our security? We’re not in danger…are we?”

“No.” Jack shakes his head. “No more than the average person. It’s why Statesman keeps our identities locked down so tight. Even the president doesn’t know who we are.” He doesn’t want to scare you, but he wants you to know the truth. “However, we take our families very seriously, so you are protected as if you were. Kind of like being the First Family, without the Secret Service taking you shopping.”

“This is…” You can’t help but shake your head, brows knitted together as you try to absorb the inherent truth of the situation. Jack didn’t make himself invisible to you for fifteen years – he was that way to everyone. He had kept his life to himself years ago to protect you. To keep you safe from his big, wild world of spies and secrets. “This is a lot,” you murmur finally, squeezing his hand tightly. “But it would be…it would be stupid not to do it, right? Like if someone did figure out Mallory was your daughter and something did happen, then she could be protected?”

“Listen, even if you want nothing to do with this, Mallory will be protected.” He promises fervently. He won’t let his second child down like he did his first. He knows rationally that he couldn’t have prevented the events that took them from him, but he can’t help but wonder if being an agent at the time wouldn’t have helped. “I promise you, Statesman won’t let anything happen to her. Even if you aren’t aware we are around.”

“At the risk of being…sentimental in front of your boss?” Nodding in the older man’s direction, you never talk or your eyes off Jack. “I spent fifteen years with you on my mind every single day, Jack Daniels. I’m not bowing out just because things get weird.” The conversation about what the two of you are to each other still needs to happen, but it’s suddenly feeling even more important than it did when you were only talking about your daughter’s happiness and not her safety.

“This sounds like a mighty fine time for me to say Goodnight.” Champ interjects with a clearing of his throat. “Jack, you tell Ginger when you’re coming, and I’ll have the ranch house made up.” He looks towards you with a polite nod. “Ma’am.” He taps his glasses and his image disappears.

“So…” Flustered and still a little overwhelmed, you take your glasses off and carefully hand them back to Jack. “Your boss seems…nice? Polite, at least.”

“He’s a good man.” Jack admits. “He’s the one that recruited me to Statesman.”

“Our walk got derailed.” You blow out a breath, knowing that that is your fault. “But I think…I think this is more important.”

“I understand that it’s a lot, sweetheart.” Jack acknowledges, moving over to you and rubbing your shoulders soothingly. “We can take the walk now, or we can have a drink and talk.”

“I think it’s only fair that I try that whiskey you sell.” Reaching up for him, your thumb smoothes over his stubbled cheek like you’re trying to reassure him and not yourself. “Central Park will be there the next time we want to take a walk. We should talk about things. I mean…you just found out you have a daughter and I just found you, so…there’s a lot to unpack.”

“Yes it is.” Making his way over to the bar cart gives him something to do. Keeps him from grabbing you and kissing you again. Talking needs to happen. “You really have thought about me since then?” He asks, picking up a bottle of Reserve.

The urge to chuckle is one you can stifle, and you walk across the room to the sofa beside his elaborate bar. “Of course I have.” You tell him honestly. “You—you changed my life, Jack. Even if you hadn’t given me Mallory, you still would have changed everything for me.”

“Cursing me for leaving you alone isn’t the same as wanting me there.” He smirks as he pours you both a double and brings the glasses and the bottle over to the couch.

“There was more wanting than cursing.” The glass he hands you is heavy, the liquor inside a rich and syrupy deep brown. “Although I probably would have said some pretty unkind things to you during the actual labor so maybe it’s better that you missed that part.”

Jack chuckles and sits down beside you. “Every woman has the right to curse the person who did that to her as much as she wants.” He reasons before he holds his glass out to you. “To being neighbors.”

“Neighbors.” The glasses make a pretty clinking sound and the warm, smoky sweet burn of your first sip of Statesman makes you hum pleasantly. “I have all kinds of photo albums and home videos. You can took a look whenever you want.”

“I will.” Jack wants that more than anything. “I want to see whatever you’ve got. I’ve always wanted kids…before.” He admits quietly. “Wanted five or six of them.”

“I always thought I’d have two or three.” Though obviously neither of you had ever anticipated having them together. “Mal used to ask me for a little sister for Christmas every year…” You shrug a little, staring into your glass. “You don’t have to tell me what happened to your wife, but I—if you want to talk about it, I’m all ears.”

“No.” Jack sighs softly. “You deserve to hear about it. Despite what you think, I was in the military.” He tells you. “My wife, she was eight months pregnant with our baby boy and she went to the convenience store to get me another pack of cigarettes. I was about to go out into the field for the weekend and wanted to make sure I had enough.” Bitter guilt rises in the back of his throat thinking about how he was packing for a fucking field op while his wife and child lay dying. “She— two fucking meth head out freaks came in to rob the place.” His voice wavers and he coughs. “She was caught up in the crossfire.”

“Oh, Jack…” You set your glass down on the nearest table and reach for him instead. “I’m so sorry.” Losing him to the wild and unknown world was hard enough. You can’t even imagine the heartbreak of knowing there was no chance you could ever have him back again. “And I…I didn’t mean to offend you. I just meant – the only military men I’ve known were uptight. Sticklers. And you were…you were so free when I knew you. But I guess…I guess we actually have a lot to learn about each other.”

“I was kind of a rule breaker in the military.” He admits with a grin. “It was join Statesman or going to the brig.”

“That sounds more like the man I knew.” It makes you smile, despite the ache on his behalf for the loss of his wife and first child. Losing Mallory would completely destroy you.

“I— when we met, I was sure that no one would ever touch my heart again.” He takes another sip of his whiskey. “And when you did, you scared the shit out of me.”

“If it’s any consolation, you surprised me, too.” Picking up your glass again seems to be the best way to keep yourself from holding onto him like a lifeline so you cradle it in both hands and look down into the amber liquid so you don’t have to see if he reacts badly to what you’re about to say. “I didn’t exactly think that I was going to meet the only man I’d ever love at 21.”

“Did you try to move on, darlin’?” He asks quietly. “Surely there someone that had captured your interest?”

“I tried.” You nod but hesitate to look up at him, afraid of being overly emotional while you talk. “But nothing really came of any of it. Finding a man my own age was out because none of them wanted to be fathers so young, and after I while I realized that none…none of them compared to you anyway. And Mal doesn’t deserve to have some half-assed excuse for a stepfather just because I miss sharing a bed with someone. I love her too much to bring anyone into her life that isn’t worthy of her.”

“That’s good.” Jack can’t fault you for your view. “I haven’t found anyone either. One-night stands are as close to a connection as I’ve made in the past fifteen years.”

“Well.” When you shrug again it is accompanied by a lopsided smile. “You had your secret life to protect. Can’t fault you for being picky about who you share it with.”

“It wasn’t because of that.” He murmurs softly. “It was because of someone else.”

“You…met someone else?” It shouldn’t surprise you. And it shouldn’t hurt as badly as it does. But you can feel every single one of those long-seen hopes breaking in half as you take a long drink of that whiskey he’s now known for.

Jack looks at you for a moment before he snorts and shakes his head. “Sweetheart…” he shuffles closer. “I was talking about you.”

“You—?” Shock paints your face yet again, and your head shoots up to find him looking down at you so softly that you could just break right down and cry. It makes your voice soft and your shoulders round, and your eyebrows raise up in bewildered surprise. “You really loved me that much?”

His hand comes up to stroke your cheek, wanting nothing more than to lean in and kiss away your surprise, but he doesn’t. Instead he looks into your eyes and nods seriously. “Darlin’ I left my heart with you in Mexico. You— you made me realize I could love again, and you swiped it right up and took it with you when we went our own way.”

“I took a little bit more of you with me than just that,” you remind him, shifting slightly so you can thread your fingers through his other hand. “But you…I guess you never knew that you carried my heart all these years, like I didn’t know I carried yours.” It’s sobering, an irony of the glass you have in your hand, and you move that much closer to him on the couch. “We were so caught up in having the best temporary moments together that we didn’t consider letting it be more.”

“I don’t know if I woulda been good for you until I got my head on straight.” Jacks admits, knowing he had to work through some issues to admit his feelings for you back then.

“Seems an awful lot like a second chance.” You’re almost afraid to say it, but the echo of that kiss in your kitchen and the shy graze of his calloused fingertips on your cheek give you so much hope that you’re bursting with it.

“It seems like.” He hums, enjoying the way your eyes flutter slightly. “It would be a shame to waste it, wouldn’t it?” He asks, his thumb rubbing over your bottom lip before he leans in and kisses you again.

It would be a damn shame to waste it, you could not agree more. You’re so eager not to waste it that you barely get your glass onto the nearest table, abandoning it entirely to run your fingers through Jack’s thick hair and pull him closer.

There is a groan that rumbles from his mouth, into yours. Passionate and lusty while his own hand fumbles to deposit the nearly empty glass so he can wrap his hand around your back and tug you back towards him. It's what he's wanted for so long. Needed for so long and it's finally here.

You’re not sure which one of you loses balance first, but the result of desperately clinging to each other and refusing to let go lies in Jack toppling backward and taking you with him. It is by no means the first time you have ended up sprawled out across his chest in a fit of passion, but it has been long enough since the last time that it makes both of you smile into the kiss. You might have laughed if you weren’t so hungry to swallow every other sound he feeds you.

Jack grunts, grinning against your lips and he takes advantage by sliding his hand down to cup your ass. Rocking you on the steadily hardening bulge in the front of his jeans.

Whimpering in response, you plant your knees easily on either side of his trim hips to steady yourself and let all your sounds of approval drip into his mouth. It’s been years since you so much as kissed someone, let alone was in such a compromising position with anyone, but you soak it up with glee – because it’s him.

Suddenly it’s fifteen years ago. Both of you greedy and unable to get enough of each other. Keeping his lips on yours while he’s kicking at his boots, trying to toe them off so he can move on to removing other clothing. Unless you want him too, he’s not stopping.

Needy moans and sighs fill the room, elevating the sound of pants and labored breathing to a favourite symphony. His boots and your shoes hit the floor gracelessly, letting your balance shift once more to focus on unbuttoning his shirt even though your hands are clumsy and eager.

“Jesus.” Once the two of you come up for air, it’s a race to see who can get more buttons undone, or ripped. Jack doesn’t give a shit. The sacrifice of a shirt is a small price to pay for being able to touch you. Reaching between you when you get it opened, he flicks the button of your jeans open and drags down your zipper.

“Should’ve— fuck— worn a dress,” you grumble, hating the few seconds that you have to lift off of him to actually pull your clothing off. Your favourite shirt and most flattering jeans hit the floor with an unceremonious thunk, and you wish like hell that you had thought to put on cuter underwear for a split second before getting self-conscious. This isn’t the same body he knew – you’ve changed since pregnancy and childbirth, filled out with age. There is always a chance, however slim, that he might not be attracted to you as much as he used to be.

“Fucking hell.” Jack moans as he grabs onto your hips, larger and softer than they were before. Matured. He loves it. “Still fucking gorgeous.” He thought you were a knockout fifteen years ago, but you are even more beautiful now. Maybe it’s because you’re the mother of his child, or still hold his heart, but you are everything he wants in a woman.

That answers that, you think with a grin, as Jack practically pulls you back into his lap. “Jeans,” you mumble against his lips, your fingers already working to pull his belt buckle open. The man has never owned a single pair of jeans that wasn’t a damn second skin – not then and not now – and you love it.

Jack growls when you start to push and tug his jeans down. "Fuck, I'll do it, take off your fucking shirt." He begs, gently pushing you off of him so he can leap up off the couch and start to peel the jeans down his thighs.

You have never minded taking orders when they’re that eager, and twenty seconds later you’re standing completely naked next to the couch as he finishes kicking off his jeans and pulling off the undershirt that he was wearing under his plaid. He’s softer now, a slight belly where there used to be flat abs, and his thighs thicker with that little bit of inevitable padding that has kept strong muscles safe over the years. The body of a god right up to the cowboy pornstache and it makes you grin wickedly. “Lie back, baby,” you insist, moving to get back on the sofa and straddle his waist again.

He fucking loved, loved, when you rode him. Always teasing that he was your broncin' buck and you were trying to break him in. Laying down and reaching for you, noticing your breasts have changed and loving that fact. Giving him the daughter that is next door changed your body and when he gets the chance, he's going to kiss and praise each change individually. "Jesus, I don't remember the last time I've been this hard." He groans, cock twitching against his stomach.

“Probably the last time I was this wet.” Rolling your hips forward in his lap drags your dripping cunt along the underside of his cock and makes you both moan. “Fuck, Jack.” Actually having him beneath you again and not just imagining him with your fingers between your thighs is a head rush of the highest order, making you wish you could still swivel your hips like you used to, to just slide him right inside you.

"Yeah?" Jack grunts, tensing his stomach muscles and making his cock lift a few inches off his belly. "You like the feel of that cock against your pussy, sweetheart?" He moans himself when you grind down against him a little harder. "You— you should feel it inside you again, just to be sure you like it."

Steadying yourself with one hand on the back of the sofa, your other wraps around his thick length eagerly, guiding the tip of his cock to your entrance when you lift your hips. It’s all a series of relatively small movements, but sinking down on him – slowly, because shit you forgot how thick he is – is that perfect, sinful version of heaven you’ve been missing for years and years. The way your pussy has to stretch to accommodate him makes you cry out in pleasure, head dropping back while all your focus jumps to the twitching cock inside you.

Hissing between his clenched teeth, Jack tries to stay still. To not buck up and bury himself deep as your tight walls slide over him. He's already about to bust and he will curse himself blue if he disappoints you like that. Needing to make sure that you cum at least twice before he lets go himself. Especially since he hadn't eaten that pretty little cunt like he should have. After, he'll do that after. Right now, his hands are clawing at your hips and his feet are pushing against the end of the sofa so hard the damn thing creaks in protest.

There is no wasted time here, no pause to absorb or adjust, just the greedy rhythm of rise and fall as you set a slow pace riding him. He looks exquisite underneath you – like some kind of pornographic Renaissance painting – and you let yourself fall forward to press another earnest, sloppy kiss to his lips.

Jack pants against your lips, eyes fixed on you as you bounce on his cock. His hands helping you rise and sink down on him. Encouraging you to ride him at your pace but also encouraging you when your pace falters.

“M-missed you so fucking much.” It falls from your lips without thinking, the roar of your pounding blood too much to blot out the rambling of your heart. “Always l-loved you.”

"God, I love you." He breathes out, feeling like he's drowning at how harshly he's breathing and still cannot get air. He loves it. Winding his arms around you like steel bands and dragging you down to his chest while he starts to thrust up into you.

Fingertips grasping his chest for purchase mean your nails scrape over his nipples, making him gasp and you grin. He always liked just a touch of pain with his pleasure, the roughness being a gorgeous byproduct of how needy you both always were for each other.

“Fuck!” Jack bucks his hips up, dragging you down to bite on your bottom lip and grind up into you. Sex with you was always unrestrained and it seems like nothing has changed. Sure the parts are aged, but the two of you seem to work like a well-oiled machine together. The memories come back in a flood with every touch – what he liked best and the things you had discovered together. Your skin burns under his attention, his tongue tracing searing circles on your neck and chest and large hands imprinting themselves on your sides as he clutches you against him.

Groaning against your skin, he reacquaints himself with your taste. There’s nothing like it, intoxicating and completely you. “Good girl.” He pants. “You’re just as sweet as the first time I had you.”

You keen at the praise, never having been shy about loving it from him, and grind yourself down on his cock with a gasp. The extra friction of coarse hair at the base of his shaft on your sensitive clit makes you buck and whine, as your thighs starting to shake and the tightening coil in your belly heralds an orgasm like you haven’t felt in years.

“That’s it. That’s it.” Jack growls, watching you fall apart in awe. You’ve always been breathtaking when you cum, but this time is punching him in the gut. Making him lunge up and capture your lips with his own, swallowing your cries for himself.

Shaking in his arms isn’t a new sensation for you, but it’s like you’re feeling it for the first time all over again. Sobbing his own name into that kiss is like a prayer, and you feel for a moment like you’re floating on the most wonderful cloud in the world as he fucks you slowly through the aftershocks.

Jack hums, slowly lowering himself back down to the couch and sighing, stroking your back gently as you pant on his chest. “Like riding the best bike.”

“Not done yet,” you hum, regaining the rise and fall rhythm after the moment you need to catch your breath.

Jack chuckles and slides his hand down to grip your ass. “What if I told you I came?” He asks playfully.

“No you didn’t.” Your chuckle is throaty and deep. “You’re still hard, and you didn’t do the thing with your eyebrows.” The thing happens every time, or at least it used to, and the way his forehead would knit together in intense concentration only for his eyebrows to raise up fully in relaxation afterward became one of your favorite little quirks of his.

He chuckles again, shaking his head as he wonders how you know him so well. "Guilty." He strokes your back and hums. "I just don't want you too sore, darlin'."

“If you really don’t want to fill me up, I guess I understand.” Rolling your hips in a figure right in his lap draws a sharp gasp from him and you grin. “But I’ll be glad to be sore from taking you.”

“Sweetheart, you’re gonna kill me.” He groans and grins at you. “Make me cum.” He orders, slapping your hip playfully.

“You’d love to go out with your cock wet.” Nipping at his bottom lip, you only pull away so you can sit up in his lap. It gives him the best view of your tits as you ramp up your pace, bouncing on his cock with renewed vigor.

“Only if it’s your juices on my cock.” He huffs, reaching up and cupping one of your tits. “Fuck baby.” He watches you with wonder. “You’re gonna make me cum.”

It’s a race now, fingertips finding your clit and rubbing fierce circles over the swollen nub to see if you can find a second peak along with him. “Come on, baby.” There’s no better feeling than this one, right here, and you keep your eyes steady on him despite how badly they want to flutter shut. “Cum in me. F—fuck! Fill me up, Jack.”

His hips are bucking up off the sofa, his arms the only thing keeping you anchored and not flying off his cock. Whining at how good you feel around him. When he cums, blood rushes into his ears and his shout is loud and pleasure filled.

You collapse easily into his chest, panting for breath in the wake of that rushed second orgasm that just barely followed his. The combination of your own cum with his paints your pussy just as assuredly as sweat has beaded on his chest, but you lean up to kiss the space between his eyebrows with a grin. That ecstatic expression on his face when his eyebrows raise will never get old.

Humming, he purses his lips at you until you kiss him. Relaxing into the sofa now that both of you are satisfied. “Still batting a thousand.” He jokes, remembering the small teasing way you had set up a scoring system on sex.

Huffing playfully, you can’t help but grin at him. “Does it help or hurt your average that you actually fucked me so hard that you bypassed my birth control?”

“I think that counts as a grand slam.” He jokes, sliding his hands up and down your back slowly as the two of you relax. “Technically speaking, I did exactly what the act is supposed to do.”

“Technically.” You can’t really disagree with that, so you just snuggle happily into his arms and giggle slightly to yourself. “Way better than a walk.”

“Yes it was.” He agrees with a smirk, leaning up to kiss the top of your head. “Although, we do still need to talk.” It’s a hell of an ice breaker though, considering his cock is still inside you.

“I guess.” The exaggerated roll of your eyes is only to make him smile, and you draw yourself away from him reluctantly. “Give me just a minute to use the bathroom and then we can pretend to be rational adults?”

“It should be in the same location as yours.” He agrees, sitting up as you stand. “No weird tech watching you in there.” He promises with a wink. “Just old-fashioned leering on my part.”

“You’re allowed.” You promise him, striding off to his downstairs bathroom to clean yourself up and steal a moment of composure. However this conversation goes, it’s sure to be emotional.

While you're gone, Jack tugs on his boxer briefs and pours the two of you another round of whiskey. He hadn't expected the sex, even though it was great. He had truly meant for the two of you talk. He picks up your clothes and folds them neatly to set on a chair for you to dress or not, and turns on the gas fireplace. He misses the wood burning fireplace in Kentucky but can't fault the convenience of this.

When you return just a few minutes later, a self-consciousness has set in that has stolen the sway from your hips and made you grateful that Jack had stacked your clothes because it makes it a hell of a lot faster to pull them on. Not that that reunion wasn’t amazing – but you were supposed to be talking.

As disappointed as he is that you are dressing, he understands it. After you button the last button, he saunters over to you and hands you the whiskey glass. “So, what do you want, darlin’?” He asks softly. “Perfect world.”

“Perfect world?” You sip the amber liquid with a sigh – Statesman is actually incredibly tasty – and let your eyes shut for just a moment on the fantasy. The one you’ve had thousands of times over the years. “You.” You murmur, buying yourself a moment with another small sip. “Us. Our family together.”

“Okay.” He’s a little relieved that you are making it so easy for him. “I want to make sure that we make the right choices, and our daughter is priority.” He doesn’t want to fuck up or make some kind of mistake with her. “Let me know what kind of role you want me to have.”

“I want you to be as involved as you want to be.” It seems like a pithy answer, but it’s honest. You don’t have any idea how demanding his life is, or what his completely insane job might necessitate. “In a perfect world – the fantasy one – we would decide we can’t live without each other and we’d get married, and you’d be there for everything. But your life is…it’s more complicated than that. And I don’t know what is realistic to ask of you.”

Jack nods, understanding what you are saying. “I think that marriage would be the goal for us.” He says honestly. “But I do want you to see if you can handle the life I live. Date me and see if I match the memory in your pretty head.”

“I might not match what you remember, either.” Or, your worst fear, he may decide he doesn’t want to be a father after all. Actually make the conscious decision to leave you and Mallory. “Dating seems like the smart plan.”

He smiles and shakes his head. “Changed some, maybe less partying and semipublic sex, but I doubt you are much different that the girl I fell in love with.”

“Definitely less public sex.” There’s no debating that, and you practically snort into your drink as you shake your head. “My life is Mallory now. I go to the office, and I have Mal. That’s it.”

He nods, knowing that his own life is just work. “When I’m not on assignment, I’m normally just in the office every day.”

“But when you are…” Your eyes tick up to his. “You’re in danger.”

“Sometimes.” He admits but shoots you a grin. “But I’m real good at my job, darlin’.”

“So what happens when you go on a mission?” It’s the thing you can’t really wrap your head around, for obvious reasons. “I’m assuming it’s not all…shoot ups and seductions like in the movies?” At least you hope not.

Jack snorts and shakes his head. “A lot of times it’s boring intel gathering.” He explains. “And to be honest, the seduction gets old after a while. Some of these women look like little girls!” He huffs. “I’m getting old, starting to leave that to Tequila. He’s still a young buck.”

“Tequila?” The code name makes you laugh, snorting softly at how silly it sounds to your untrained ear. “Are you all named after liquor?”

“Champ is short for Champagne.” He tells you with a grin. “But don’t let him hear you callin’ him that.”

“He didn’t strike me as a champagne guy, but that was just a first impression.” Sitting back down on the couch, you draw your legs up beside you and wrap both hands around your glass with a tentative expression on your face. “So…you wouldn’t be getting shot at or sleeping with other women every time?”

“If we are together, I won’t be sleeping with anyone but you.” Jack assures you. “I’m too old to play games. Never was a man who liked a cheat.”

“Okay.” You reach for his hand, squeezing it tightly. “I…I wouldn’t have stopped you from doing your job. But it would have made me uncomfortable.”

He understands, if the roles were reversed, he would feel the same. “So we date, and we make sure that we are giving our daughter a healthy relationship to look up to.” Jack chuckles. “It’s a damn good thing you live next door.”

“We’re honest with each other and we communicate.” Never in your life have you sat and methodically plotted out your relationship like this, but maybe that was okay. Maybe doing something different was key. After all, none of those other relationships had stuck, had they? There must have been a reason. “All she’s ever wanted is to have her dad in her life. She’s going to be thrilled.”

“Darlin’, you’ve—” Jack chokes up slightly and slides closer to you. Setting his glass down so he can cup your cheek. His eyes are slightly watery but he doesn’t give a damn. “You’ve given me the best gift I could have ever imagine.” He chokes out softly. “You’re back in my life and you’ve given me a daughter, a family.”

“I hope you’re ready for baseball games and Taylor Swift concerts.” Smiling against his hand is the easiest feeling in the world, lighting you up from the inside out. “And Disney and horror movies in equal measure.”

“I’m ready for it all.” Jack grins. “Statesman has season tickets to the Yankees.”

"If you weren't already her dad, that would make you her favourite person." Setting your glass down again, you can allow yourself the luxury of sinking into his arms and inhaling the comforting smell of his cologne and whatever makes up him – along with the smell of sex that always seems to accompany you. Especially back then. "I love you, Jack." You murmur, roping your arms around him. "Always have."

“I love you too, darlin’.” Jack presses his lips to your forehead and sighs softly. “I love you so much, and I promises you – now that I’ve got you back in my arms again – I’m never lettin’ you go.”

______

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