#especially given the amount of us who are autistic
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…can’t believe i need to say this in 2024, but if you see a tumblr blog that’s an obvious sockpuppet, just block them. don’t give them any attention.
for those who weren’t aware, a sockpuppet is an account that someone uses to pretend to be someone they aren't, usually for the sake of accomplishing a particular goal. "asexual" sockpuppets were used extensively in tumblr's ace discourse years (which reached their peak in 2016-2019). aphobes and exclusionists made blogs where they roleplayed as exaggerated aspec caricatures, trying to paint asexuals as childish, ignorant, bigoted, etc - in a word, "cringey." crazey-acey-in-spacey was an especially notorious example of a sockpuppet that a lot of people took at face value, since their deliberately outrageous behavior (falsely) confirmed a lot of the biases tumblr users already had about aspecs. it's NEVER worth engaging with any of these accounts - don't feed the trolls, as they used to say.
ways to spot an "asexual" sockpuppet:
makes a lot of statements that are intentionally tone-deaf and offensive. especially look out for sudden mentions of race/analogies to racism ("ace genocide," "ace reparations") - a common tactic in the acecourse days was to paint asexuality as a "white" orientation, and to suggest asexuals were racist.
references other infamous sockpuppets like crazy-acey and the "warm milk aceggot" post.
makes claims about famous people being aspec, especially people who are known for bigoted beliefs. it was very common for aphobes to make asexual moodboards of people like thatcher or trump; they did this to paint aspecs as out of touch with reality and the wider queer community, and to strengthen the association between asexuality and bigotry.
use of the words "acey" or "asexy." some people do use these words in a positive sense now, but anti-aspec shit-stirrers used them a lot back in the day to imply asexuals were stupid and childish. (and if we're being honest? autistic, too. the aphobic parts of tumblr had a VERY strong undercurrent of ableism.)
this one's a bit less common, but watch out for references to christianity. one widespread aphobic talking point is calling asexuals "puritans" and suggesting that they're aligned more with conservative christianity than the rest of the queer community. aspec christians certainly exist, but given the history of this site, it's just better to double-check aspec accounts that bring up christianity out of the blue when they're engaging with other blogs.
it can be hard to tell the difference between a sockpuppet and a genuine aspec account if you don't have the exact same amount of 2016 tumblr brainrot as me, so feel free to message me and ask about anything you're not sure about - my dms are always open 👍
#my post#asexual#aphobia#ace discourse#ableism#long post#i can't stress enough how you should just block these people and move on. all they want is attention and if you give it to them they win#god is this absolute loser behavior though. didn't you hear? acecourse hasn't been trendy for years now. log off.
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look i get the spirit but can y’all please stop referring to all people who use neopronouns & xenogenders as “just kids who want to express themselves”? like yeah some of us are kids but a lot of us are adults, myself included, and i’m getting pretty sick of well-meaning allies accidentally insinuating that our gender identities & expressions are childish. thanks
#corvidforest#especially given the amount of us who are autistic#it very much feels like infantilization and i am fucking tired#neopronouns#neopronoun safe space#neopronouns are valid#xenogenders#xenogender safe space#xenogenders are valid#transgender
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Autism Symbol Dragon.
This is the autism symbol as a dragon. I did this to represent the influence my autism has on my art. This is a public domain drawing and anyone can use it for any reason.
I really like the infinity autism symbol over all others, especially the Godawful puzzle piece. It really encapsulates the diversity of our community and how unique every autistic individual is. But I wanted to do a little spin on it by turning it into a dragon to add some extra meaning. A dragon to me is the symbol of the imagination itself, since dragons are so diverse in of themselves and can look like or represent anything. But as well as imagination, I think the dragon also represent resilience and a ferocious passion.
My webcomic is absolutely full of different types of dragon. Here are just a few examples:
(Can you tell dragons are one of my special interests?)
I was diagnosed at about 3 and I've had a very mixed relationship with being autistic until recently. There was a time when I really hated having to bear the label of “autistic” and tried for years to erase that part of me because of the stigma. Being an artist allowed me to get away with being a bit weird because I could chalk it up to just being "an eccentric artist," but there was also the side of me that needed extra accommodations and help, the less glamorous side. I would often push myself to be as neurotypical as I could in these areas and I developed a debilitating fear of becoming a burden on others, to the point where it started damaging my mental health. Eventually, I developed panic attacks due to overworking myself (and struggles with accepting myself as queer), autistic shutdowns became more frequent and this lead to further humiliation and a further disgust towards my autism.
It wasn't until I became a freelancer a few years ago that I realised how much damage trying to hold myself to neurotypical standards was having on me. While being able to work remotely was a dream since it meant not having to deal with the sensory nightmare that is using the local bus service, it also meant I experienced autistic burnout more frequently. Then I came across the autistic community on Twitter, where I started to discover so much about myself and how my brain works.
I also made a lot of incredible friends through this and even had the courage to publicly come out as queer. Now I fully embrace being autistic, even the parts that society deems “unacceptable” like stimming and not making eye contact. I am happy in who I am and no longer see myself as a burden.
Sadly, there is often a discussion about whether autism should be cured or not, a discussion that should absolutely not be happening because autism is not a disease. If you "cured" my autism, you would also remove my art. My art and my autism are inseparable and one does not exist without the other. Autism has given me the ability to think outside the box and traits like my monotropism allow me to hyperfocus on a project until its completion. Having spoken to many autistic creatives throughout my life, a good chunk of our struggles do not come from being autistic itself, rather society’s refusal to accept or accommodate us. Many of us could achieve great things and truly innovate society, but there are too many systemic barriers in the way preventing us from doing so, and no amount of “hard work” or “conquering our disability” (fuck inspiration porn, seriously) can change that because individualistic solutions do not fix systemic problems. Simple solutions such as disability benefits that actually properly cover our living costs, a higher wage for carers of disabled people and proper work accommodations (including the option for remote work) would mean the world of difference for us.
Now personally, I am a bit more radical in my thinking and I believe the current system of Neoliberal Capitalism needs to be done away with entirely because ableism is built into Capitalism itself. This is what has drawn me to ideas such as anarchism and the Solarpunk movement. In particular, I try to live by the "12 principles of Permaculture" to the best of my ability. I think "Embrace Diversity" and "Produce No Waste" can be applied to living as a disabled person, since disabled people are often seen as a waste product under this system and embracing our differences means we are not wasted.
For those of you who have followed me for a while, you may have noticed that my art, like me, is weird. I love to embrace the weird and the quirky. My creatures are whimsical and bizarre. My characters all tend to be quirky outsiders. I have always been drawn to surrealism and absurdism, the work of Salvador Dali in particular really caught my attention.
Art has always been a safe way for me to explore the unusual and alien, and it has been a voice for me when speaking words fail. I use it to explore the things that frighten me and to help process a chaotic world. As weird as my art is, I think the weirdness and absurdity is a reflection of how weird and absurd our modern world is and how little sense it makes to me anymore.
There are often themes of environmentalism and the profound beauty of nature, influenced heavily by growing up in an area of natural beauty. Furthermore, the theme of "empathy for monsters" is a personal favourite. Maybe the reason why there are so many weird, twisted and grotesque monsters and creatures with tragic backstories in my webcomic universe is because I see myself in them - just weird little off-putting things that want compassion and to be understood.
As I have grown as a person, so has my art. The more I learn about my autism, the more I can open up and the better I can express myself.
On a final note, if you would like to support me and the work I do, please consider donating a Ko-Fi. It would really help me push towards my goal of finally launching my webcomic, plus it would also allow me to talk more about important topics surrounding disability, sustainable living and art/creature stuff.
Happy new year, everyone! And especially to all of my autistic and neurodivergent comrades out there.
#autism#actually autistic#neurodivergent#queer autistic#autistic artist#fantasy artist#digital artist#fantasy illustration#autism symbol#infinity symbol#creature design#dragon art#dragon artist#autistic art#autism art#permaculture#solarpunk
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None of that
Derek Morgan x Platonic!Reader
Warnings - meltdown, self harm stims
Spencer Reid Masterlist
Masterlist
A/N - IDK when the next update for the Autistic! reader series will be but hopefully soon! Decided to focus on Derek on this one as iv seen a lot of Spencer x autistic reader ( the main focus of the one shot series ) but who doesn't love some rep for the other characters, I may also do Emily, JJ etc x autistic reader as their own one shots :)
Reblogs, comments & likes always appreciated!!
Today had started off bad and just seemed to be getting worse. You had woken up without Spencer as he had to go off to Louisville with Hotch to do a death row interview at the last minuet meaning your carefully planned out schedule for the week now had a wrench thrown in it, something you didn't deal with at the best of times, let alone without your boyfriend.
You had checked the weather when you were picking your outfit and it was supposed to be a mild but sunny day, so you picked a shirt and skirt with a sweater vest in case it went colder than expected but on your walk to the subway the skies suddenly opened and you got drenched to the bone before you could get under any decent form of shelter. You were lucky that your go bag was at the office but it meant spending your entire commute soaking wet.
By the time you reached the office you were nearly at the point of a meltdown so you text Rossi to say you were here just taking time to calm down after a hellish commute. Once you finally walked into the bullpen you nearly flinched at the amount of noise and lights in the space. You knew today was going to be a bad one and you would be lucky to escape it without a meltdown.
You took up Spencers desk for the day, a common occurrence when he was away as it brought you comfort, so you were next to Morgan and across from Emily, two people you adore on any given day aside from the fact that today you could hear the music coming from Morgans headphones just enough to the point it was driving you up the wall and combined with Emily's constant clicking of her pen as she did her paperwork and the buzzing of the various screens and lights around the room it was becoming too much but without Spencer here you were just frozen in place. You trusted the BAU with your life, literally more often than not but you still didn't want to have an outburst in the middle of your work day, especially when it was only another hour before Spencer was due back at work, the interview having been quicker than expected.
“Can you stop! Please!” you snap at no one in particular but both Emily and Morgan freeze. You clap your hands over your mouth and make a break for Hotch's currently vacant office, a place he had specifically told you to use when he wasn't in it and you had learnt to listen to him after a few meltdowns in the FBI parking lot. You’re only half sure the door closes behind you as you fall into the corner of the office Hotch had shifted around specifically for your meltdowns. He had kept it dark so it all blended in and didn’t overwhelm you but it was all soft, cushions on the floor and wall with some small fidget toys in a box to the side so you could grab them.
You can hear footsteps approaching the doorway and the door slowly creaking open and the footsteps slowly approach, it's not Hotch or Spencer. It can't be Emily, JJ or Garcia given they’re all in heels leaving it to be Morgan. “Hey baby girl, can you look at me?” he asks as he sits down cross legged in front of you, coming down to your level. “There you are, you gotta come back down to me okay sweetheart? I know you're overloaded right now” He keeps his voice low to try and encourage you to breathe. He didn't notice the fact that your hands are scratching at your arms until they were starting to bleed, “Hey hey hey mama none of that thank you okay, here grab my hands okay, you can squeeze as hard as you like, just no scratching yourself up okay?” He's not harsh about it, just firm. You grab onto his outstretched hands and he starts trying to guide your breathing. “There you go, see? You're doing it now. Do you want your fidgets? I can also go grab you a Hot chocolate or something, I don't have pretty boy on hand but he should be back in a half hour or so and Hotch has cleared you to go home when he's come back.” You smile at Morgan, reaching for the box of fidgets and grabbing one out. “I'm going to go grab you a Hot chocolate missy, behave while i'm gone okay?” You laugh as he leaves, settling back into the cushions with the fidget, nearly falling asleep.
Taglist - @reidstheyfriend , @oosnapitskat, @lover-of-books-and-tea
Add yourself here!
#greyswritings#criminal minds#criminal minds x reader#spencer reid x reader#spencer reid#spencer reid x you#derek morgan#derek morgan fluff#derek morgan fanfiction#derek morgan x autistic!reader#spencer reid x autistic!reader#x autistic reader
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(Warning for discussion of abuse)
There is a certain ableist and classist feel to the way that a lot of people talk about highschool education and graduation that I've noticed. "I bet they never graduated highschool" is often used as an insult and to imply stupidity, for example. I've noticed this trend for a long time, but struggled to put it into words.
While education is important, I often feel very put down by the amount of emphasis placed on being a highschool graduate (and, on the opposite end, the disdain for non-graduates). I never graduated, due to a variety of factors; I suffered very extreme abuse starting in first grade from the school environment (As a diagnosed autistic kid growing up in SPED in the 2000s, ABA was the standard), I was being abused at home, I moved schools a lot, I struggle with several disabilities which impacted my ability to learn and developmentally I was never really at the same level as my peers besides in English and art, I developed chronic physical issues while I was still in school due to a genetic condition, and finally, I was kicked out of the house when I was 17 by my parents and I just never ended up going back to school (not that I could have graduated anyway due to a variety of issues).
I was never able to learn quite right and that lead to me falling further and further behind. By the time I was in middle school, I was already so far behind my peers that even if my teachers had wanted to help me learn the content, there was so much they would have had to teach me that it would have been impossible for them to fit it into the time I had with them, especially when they had a lot of other students to attend to besides me. On top of that, I had already given up on my own education sometime during elementary school, so any attempts that were made by my teachers were not well-received by me. I had already developed a complex web of trauma responses to anything to do with school by that point.
It seemed that I was caught in an impossible situation where between the trauma I suffered with and my autism, I could not tolerate even being in a classroom setting, much less learn in it, but there were no other options, which lead to chronic activation of trauma responses which overwhelmed both me and my teachers as well as everyone else in my life. There was also no understanding for me in these settings either, and nobody informed enough to realize what was going on with me and why I was constantly either shutting down and unresponsive or having severe panic attacks. Rather, I was called lazy, manipulative, not trying hard enough, making excuses, acting out for attention, and a slew of other insults as well as near-constant punishments which only served to traumatize me further.
To this day, I only have a second grade education in math. I do not know multiplication, division, algebra, physics, chemistry, and a variety of other subjects. Attempting to study school subjects gives me flashbacks no matter which method I use, whether it's online or with another person or on my own. I am gifted in English, but otherwise I do not know many of the things that people are generally taught in school as kids.
When I tell people I never graduated, often the response is "it's okay, you can still get your GED!" as if me not having graduated is a character flaw that I must eventually work to fix. It makes me feel as though my worth and value as a person is tied to whether or not I have at least a highschool education, and that without it I am less worthy of people's time.
Going back to my initial point, if not graduating highschool makes you "stupid", you must also consider who in practice is unable to graduate highschool - I find it is often disabled kids, traumatized kids, and impoverished kids. Not all of them, I'm sure, but definitely a lot of them.
Tying intellect and a person's worth to whether or not they graduated highschool fucks over those who couldn't through no real fault of their own and frames them as lesser for it. How can you say you believe in disability rights when you shit on those who are too disabled to complete school? How can you say you are against classism when you view people who could not graduate due to having to work full-time as lesser than you?
I feel that regardless of how much people insist they are an advocate (or how much they say "No no, when I said people who don't graduate are stupid I didn't mean those people, I only meant what I see as the acceptable group of non-graduates to call stupid"), there are biases at play regarding perceived intellect and formal education. I am viewed as inherently less-than when people learn I did not graduate. My lack of a highschool graduation certificate or "at least" a GED is viewed with pity by just about everyone I talk to.
I don't have a neat way to wrap up this post, but I do think it is important for people to examine their own biases when it comes to discussing formal education, as well as the overlap of non-graduates and marginalized groups, especially as it pertains to disability politics and capitalism.
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I find your thoughts on fandom interesting, and in general, I'm really glad to see more discussion of the bad shit fandom can/is doing to young women in radblr spaces. But I mean this as an honest question: Why do you consider fandom not challenging writers/readers such a problem? These aren't professional writing spaces, and the vast majority of fanfic writers don't intend to go into them. Does an artistic hobby *need* to challenge its participants to be worthwhile? I mean this all really genuinely, especially as someone who *does* work in the arts and *does* actively want work that challenges me, and has traditionally prided herself on it -- are these inherent moral goods? Am I a reasonable standard to expect of other people? Is engaging with boundary-pushing art a requirement of healthy maturity? Why? Is, say, a human rights lawyer who spends her free time watching trashy reality shows blighted, somehow, by that fact? What about a cashier who watches the same stuff because she's genuinely not interested in anything else? And, given the vast majority of readers of actual books basically read the way fanfic-only readers read -- the same genres, which use well-worn tropes -- do we think fandom is actually keeping its participants from more worthwhile experiences?
(I suspect you might argue this is dumbing down the publishing industry, which I would really disagree with, as someone in publishing -- I know we can all point to Ali Hazelwood or a million YA books that advertise with tropes, but I really can't emphasize enough that this has been the case since modern publishing began, and I think pinning "so-so prose that's The Same Old Shit" on the current young female writer cohort borders on sexism, tbh.)
I've been thinking about these questions a lot lately, and I just don't know the answers. My gut wants to say yes, it's good to present challenging work to people, especially women, because art is a key part of the human experience, and can effect all sorts of societal things. But also ... I know very little about the environment, including my immediate natural environment, and if I'm honest, I'm not really inclined to learn. I'm sure learning about it would effect all sorts of change in my life and concept of self. But I'm probably not going to do it because I have a limited amount of time and I'd rather give it to other things. Is that better or worse than engaging with challenging art? Is it better or worse to be me than the woman reading the same old tropey fanfic in her free time?
I think what I WOULD argue is that, specifically, fandom as it is reinforces patriarchy and induces a lot self-destruction and alienation in young women, with particularly vile effects on young lesbians, autistic women, etc. But if it didn't do that....would I still have a problem with it? I don't know. But it's interesting as hell to think about, and I'd love your thoughts on it.
hello nona :-) many interesting points, much to consider
>Does an artistic hobby need to challenge its participants to be worthwhile?
no. I’m sure there are plenty of people who enjoy crochet or knitting or something like that for the sake of it or to de-stress. I’m sure there are also plenty of people who write and draw for the sake of it with little interest in grinding for improvement. that’s fine. the problem is when you have people who replace reading and personal edification with endless fluff + pointless indulgence.
reading... things... that are above your level, that actually make you think, is how you increase your vocabulary, your linguistic competence, your critical thinking skills, your ability to express yourself. difficult and complex texts present you with opportunities to broaden your perspective. they stimulate your mind, present you with new ideas; they can help you grow as a person in ways that the Same Old Shit simply won’t/can’t. it would be like benching the bar every day for 10 years straight and expecting to get stronger... I presume. I don’t lift weights.
as I said previously, I don’t think fanfic is going to destroy your brain, but if you read nothing but fanfic, that is on the same level as (or maybe worse than) reading nothing at all. of course I’m going to be critical of a community of people who humblebrag about how they can’t bring themselves to read 25 pages of literature in an academic (non yaoitastic) context.
ya ya it’s a joke they’re joking very funny, but do you see people of other creative pursuits or hobbies joking about how they can’t bring themselves to focus on a piece of actual literature or nonfiction? how they have zero interest in anything outside of anime boys kissing each other? it’s a sign of intellectual stagnation (and eventual regression imo).
I watch a lot of shitty youtube videos, but I acknowledge that they are basically a waste of my time. meanwhile you have post after post singing the praises of how culturally important and worthy of respect Our Beloved Fic Writers are in spite of the fact that their work is, by and large, completely self-indulgent shit! there’s just so much potential that isn’t being tapped into & so much complacency... it’s very frustrating to me. I find it dishonest. red white and royal blue is not going to change the world... lol
for the record, yes, you are right, lots of Real book-readers also read mostly self-indulgent shit. genre fiction is far more popular than anything else... and I don’t care for booktok either. in fairness, literary fiction isn’t always good, and I’m sure there were many women who read nothing but terrible pulp novels 70 years ago too. that doesn’t make fandom any better! not to say this is all women’s fault - I just have zero frame of reference for how “cultured” men may or may not be, and I don’t really care either way. I focus on fandom girlies because they’re what I know, & I want women to be... better, or at least more interesting. this is, of course, sexist by definition. I hold myself and other women to higher standards. I will admit to that. I’ll also admit to the fact that I do not care about men or what they are writing or reading and would not give a shit if they all became illiterate thoughtless slugs. it is what it is.
truthfully, I have no interest in moralizing any of this. I just find it depressing! it’s resulting in more and more women who cannot relate to and have zero interest in anything outside of the narrowly defined fanfic bubble - so, more and more women who can’t relate to me or what I care about. I’m selfish, and I think it’s unfortunate that there are so many young female writers clearly capable of writing something interesting who nevertheless restrict themselves to lowest common denominator coombrained garbage because it’s what’s easy and popular.
do we have a responsibility to pester random strangers about their amateur fanfic? naw. who has the time? all I know is that conversations I’ve had with my female friends about our original works or other women’s writing have been vastly more substantial and enlightening than any argument about who tops or bottoms in supernatural... imo. in my opinion
re: the environment and social responsibility, I also have no interest in debating what matters are the most important and whether you have a personal, moral obligation to educate yourself about them. I recognize that we all have a limited amount of time and energy to dedicate to something which is admittedly fairly peripheral to most people’s everyday concerns (such as... paying the bills). then again, so is almost everything.
at the end of the day, I just think it is an awful shame that some women would - and they freely admit this - rather turn their brains off and do nothing, think about nothing, read the same shit over and over, watch the same shows over and over, draw and write the same things and dynamics over and over... than do anything else. anything different or thought-provoking or uncomfortable. it is a loss for the breadth and the depth of women’s contributions to culture as well as their empathy and intellectual curiosity.
obligatory food analogy: a little bit of junk food won’t kill you, but if that’s all you’re eating, you are probably not... doing... well
and that’s not even getting into the social contagion present within fandom re:mogai, relationships, and gender identity shit (which I would say probably has a lot to do with the underdeveloped critical thinking skills and worldviews of girls who read nothing but fanfiction). I would love to come back to that at some point, but I think this post is long enough, so I’ll just put a pin in it. there’s honestly an insane amount that I have to say about common talking points regarding the value of yaoi/fanfic (in terms of how they portray Marginalized Identities and Relationships and how it supposedly helps women navigate their own trauma through a proxy or some shit like that) oh god this is a horrible run-on .... that’s all for now! send post!
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The Anomalies headcanons
This is Spiderverse x Pjo x DC crossover team i've been working on that consists of Miles,Percy and Jason.If you don't like that idea,please just scroll past-Being nice is free and easy
@honeypotsworld @jelmet @insomniac-jay @julieemarine @floof-ghostie @cottoncandyspikes @c0tt0n-c4ndy-sw1rlz @moonage-gaydream @desi-pluto @genderfluid-bat @ammomancer @edityrhometown @spnandmarvelrunmylife @someallpowerfulforce @prettyboybirdie @templarhalo @jellyjays
They're called 'The Anomalies' because they're 'not supposed to exist'.Miles gets called one by name,Poseidon wasn't meant to have kids anymore and Jason's ressurection wasn't planned by anyone good.They use the name as reclamation to those people who use their existence against them
Percy's dimension is Earth 27 and Jason's is Prime Earth
Percy and Jason are afro-caribbean like Miles,both being dominican and Percy half black-greek.They're also all autistic and trans,with Miles and Jason being trans guys and Percy a trans woman who's full name is Persephone,chosen by her as a thank you to the og for giving her what's basically ancient greek magic hrt-Metamorphose,food that's been blessed by Aphrodite to give the eater their dream apperance
Miles' design is the same other than a few scars he gains on their adventures(Because he's perfect as he is <3)but Jason has brown skin,shoulder length dreads with one being white from the Lazarus Pit and is fat in addition to his canonical muscle and Percy has the darkest skin out of all of them,kinky hip length hair that's naturally styled in a way that makes it look like waves and is curvy,busty and has some more muscle than in canon and her gray streak turned white instead of fading completely so she dyes it sea blue to blend in.She's also pastel punk,Jason is goth and Miles just kinda does his own thing,although he does have a love for cute like things like Sanrio which Percy helped him embrace so he wears merch from it
Miles ends up becoming a Blue Lantern thanks to befriending Kyle and earns Apollo's blessing by being truly and earnestly dedicated to his art,with Apollo sobbing like a baby when he gave it to him because of how amazed he was(Percy to resist the urge to slash him away from him)
The reason Sally has sea color changing eyes is that she has kryptonian dna thanks to interdimensional shenanigans from her great grandparents escaping Krypton before it's explosion and this is why Percy is even stronger than your average Big Three Kid.After being adopted by Clark,she's given the name Per-El but even before that,he acts as a fatherly mentor to her so similar to the Persephone thing,she dones the Superfam symbol on her costume as 'Hydro'.Her costume is black and sea blue and has a hood and a lower face mask like Stephanie's
She also ends up hosting Venom for a significant amount of time and actually made him more scared of her than she is of him.Many people still wonder how she managed that-The ones who don't know her personally that is
Jason's Lazarus Pit dna being exposed to Miles' Spiderperson kind for so long and so often turned him into a Spider Mutant similar to Miguel,only with werewolf-like traits instead.He was pissed about it at first,especially with Miles' distressed apologies making him feel guilty and Percy's teasing,but learned to accept it and went under 'Batspider' until he learned to control his newfound powers.His costume is moddled after Miles' but with his own gothic twists like his Spider Symbol being cracked("Girls,girls,contain yourselves,there's enough to go around!" "Percy,for fuck's sake-" "Jay,you look like black Emo Elmo" "......How would anyone be able to tell i'm black in this???" "Same way they do with me.It's about vibes")
They met post itsv but pre atsv,post hoo when Percy graduated high school but toa never happened and a few days after utrh(the movie version is the one were following since that's the best written one).Doc Ock had survived the crash and gone into hiding to make another dimension teleportation device,becoming much more unhinged in the process,and attacked the town square to plant it on Miles to get rid of him by giving him 'a fate worse than death' and Percy's defying of the gods went way farther than in canon so they asked Apollo to bring her to Olympus and banished her from their realm,both ending up on Prime Earth and literally crashing straight into Jason in his Red Hood gear as he rode out further than the outskirts Gotham on his motorcyle.Percy and Miles hit it off instantly and it was helped by reminding eachother of Gwen and Nico,Jason decided to make sure Miles survived because he saw his Robin self in him and Percy and Jason bickered eachother's heads off from the start
Team Mom Percy so true.She does her best to make sure they all eat good,sleep well,don't go out on missions with too bad of injuries,keep up with training and are reassured they're loved.Miles and Jason gladly return the favor(Though Jason's more subtle about it)
Percy and Jason=Miles defense and hype squad
Percy encourages Miles to embrace his inner kid and eventually tells that one of the reason's for it is her own extremely lonely childhood that she dosen't wanna see him go through.That was the first time he'd been her shoulder to cry on and they were closer than ever afterwards.He appreciates it a lot because he'd been getting at the age where it's considered 'inappropriate' for boys to be 'cutesy' and it was upsetting to him and she helped him own it
Jason regularly uses Miles as a head rest and has an arm slung around Percy's shoulder,both as affection but the latter also for protective reasons
Miles draws Percy and Jason instead of Gwen in his sketchbook(That scene was mad cute but i prefer found family angles over romances ones when it comes Miles for the most part)and they tease him about just like she did("Love you too,Girasolito." "Damn,you really look up to us huh?" "Where's the River Lethe when you need it?!")
Jason and Percy are queerplatonic partners.Autism 2 Autism Red-coded 2 Blue-coded Transmasc 2 Transfem Bat 2 Super Communcation
They all big white bloob eyes in their costumes,including Jason with his helmet!!Also,in superhero dimensions,masks and helmets move with the wearers facial expression
Jason teaches Miles to channel his anger in useful ways and Miles helps Jason's rage calm itself
CHAOTIC ASF EVEN OFF DUTY.McSupers trips at odd hours,saying the weirdest shit because they're just that open with eachother,fucking around with their powers and even more!!Their love language is being sweet freaks together
#the anomalies#miles morales#percy jackson#persephone jackson#jason todd#black percy#latino percy#afrolatino jason supremacy#blue lantern miles#apollo blessed miles#part kryptonian percy#per-el#hydro#symbiote!percy#clark kent#latino superfam tag#spiderman#robin#red hood#spider mutant jason#batspider#spiderverse#atsv#pjo#hoo#batfam#ditf#lost days#utrh#letters from summer
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I couldn't make it to Friday. I just missed you all so much. I also missed talking with a few friends and sharing opinions.
Like, I just read 10 comics from a Wonder Woman run from the 80s that's honestly pretty good. There's a lot of great panels and pages that I would loved to share and such.
I also recently watched Delicious in Dungeon, as per request from a friend of mine. My favorite is Laios. I'm not one to point out characters who are "autistic coded" like my fellow neordivergents, but I am one to look at characters, point at them, and go, "I'm just like that" when looking at them. I felt that way with Abed Nadir, who I still say is one of the best mirror image I've felt when looking at a character. And while I'm sure Laios isn't actually autistic, to me he is. And given that non autistic people try to tell me that The Good Doctor and Sheldon are good representations of autism, at least let me have Abed and Laios.
I've also made great leeway into my Doctor Who review, almost finishing The First Doctor's run. Though, I very much miss Ian, Barbara, and even Vicki. Screw Steven especially. And Dodo...partially.
And I have one DCEU movie left before finishing this first part of this DCEU retrospective I'm working on. Sidenote, you're going to see real quick why I don't talk about movies and shows that I hate for long periods of time. You would NOT like me when I'm angry.
While I was gone, I also missed some creators on Tumblr who's art and posts made my day. You have no idea how boring a lunch break is when you don't have an endless amount of MoringMark comics to scroll through.
So, yeah, I couldn't be kept away for long...but I am going to start limiting my use on Tumblr. At least, with how much I scroll through it. I don't want another breakdown like i had last Friday and I'm going to limit what I see on here and stay off of Twitter especially. Shit gets WAY more intense on their, especially the shaming. I voiced how heavy my heart felt with everything going on in the world, and I was met with some understanding and care. If I voiced it on Twitter, I'd likely get people calling me selfish and that I don't deserve a break. So...yeah, no more Twitter for at least a month.
But on here? I'm sticking around. Just in a way that I feel more comfortable. Maybe in the future, I'll be comfortable scrolling again, but until then, it's limited Tumblr time.
Thank you all for being understanding, thanks to those who sent kind words and messages, and thanks to one in particular for helping me a lot more during all of this panic and anxiety even before I decided to take a break. I owe a lot to you, buddy.
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OPTIMUS BINGO. NEOW.
I FUCKING LOVE YOU /PLATONIC
hashtag girl
I'm gonna talk abt TFP because you know that's what my brain is unfortunately filled with and also Optimus has no right to be as interesting as she is given the show's overall quality.
There's. so much about her that I love. The weight in her movements and the consideration she puts into them. How fucking old and tired and worn down she feels. The autistic swag. Her speech patterns and expressions. Her role in the War and her duties as a Prime and how heavily it weighs on her.
Firstly, something I actually like about TFP is how the mecha have a lot of weight. The ground shakes when they move, their movements tend to be sort of slow and fluid, and, especially in the first few episodes, there are several really great shots that put into perspective how fucking MASSIVE the mecha are.
In Optimus' case, all of that remains true, but there's also the way she interacts with others. Her movements are very calculated, especially when it comes to her hands. It gives you the sense that she's aware of her size and strength and moves accordingly.
This is further underlined by seeing how she moves during battle: she's a heavy hitter, as- unlike Arcee or Bumblebee, who tend to use speed to their advantage- Optimus often uses her own frame as a weapon, and every punch has a great sense of weight and force behind it.
This contrast is incredibly cool and works so well to tell us more about Optimus. It shows us that she can absolutely be dangerous and there's a reason she's alive even after so long, while also making it clear that she's well aware of her strength and cares about others. She knows how to use her power incredibly well.
It reminds us that she's been through a lot. She's been fighting and commanding and making decisions for so long now, she's gotten perfectly used to it, but it just weighs on her and tires her out all the more.
She doesn't allow herself to participate in celebrations, or laugh, or display any sign of emotional vulnerability as long as she can help it, all so she can focus on her role. And, in the moments where she does slip up, she's quick to recover and shut herself back in.
I wish there were more works discussing/portraying the sort of… apotheosis that Optimus has (to an extent) willingly put himself through.
I think that the question of what a person is, what makes you one and how much you can strip away from someone until you're suddenly looking at something- a subject, a concept, rather than a person- is fascinating.
Optimus feels like he's something more than just a person, like he's this immortal being, and that's something he did purposefully, in my opinion. He shut himself off and stripped himself down to this- at first glance- simple idol, an idea rather than a person. It gives others hope and a sense of direction, even in desperate times, and she's willing to give them that at the cost of who she is.
She recognized the mythical status that came with his primehood, coupled with how much people looked up to her as their leader during such difficult times, and decided to fit herself into the shape of her idealized, perfect self.
She's a tragic and sad character because this is a role she didn't want, made all the more difficult by the War, and she still gave it more than what anyone could have asked for her.
Something I want to note is how others react when she puts away the act. In the scene where Starscream escapes with the keys, and Optimus does the dramatic yelling at the sky thing, it's clear that Bulkhead and Ratchet are surprised and unnerved by this. I wouldn't say they're afraid exactly, but there's certainly an amount of uncertainty and weariness there.
And, to a certain extent, it's an understandable reaction. It's made pretty clear that Optimus keeps themself very closed off and controlled, so to see them slip up like this is likely something entirely new to Bulkhead and a very rare sight to Ratchet.
But, on the other hand, it shows us how unrealistic the expectations the Autobots, albeit unintentionally, put on Optimus are. Optimus' outburst isn't him endangering his teammates, he doesn't make a reckless decision or punch a hole through a wall or anything of the sort. He yells it out. This would have been a pretty expected reaction from a lot of the other characters, but it's sudden and scary coming from Optimus.
I also really love her expressions in general. Especially how she speaks. She does her best to avoid misunderstanding, making herself as clear as possible and using 'big words' because they're more accurate (the autism is strong).
However, I do think a lot of how she presents herself simply is her. Some of it is a facade, but I do not think she's actually the joking type as she's often made out to be. Were she not in such a position, I think she would be similar to how she is now. We saw that with Orion Pax, who was much more trusting and expressive, but still more reserved than a lot of the others.
Ultimately, Optimus is a very sophisticated character, and sadly, a lot of the things that make them interesting get often either ignored, or mischaracterized to hell.
They tend to often be portrayed as naive, almost childish, especially in romantic scenarios, which is very off-putting for several reasons.
Often, people point to her attempts at talking it out with Megatron and establishing peace as a sign of naivete, and I don't think that's accurate.
She's hopeful. She's flawed, yes, but at her core, Optimus is a good, genuine and kind person with a lot of empathy. She tries to extend that towards people that many would deem either irredeemable, or just not worth it.
I think that's far from naivete. Optimus understands that they do have to kill to survive. They understand that not every situation is fit for peace talks, that they can't let themself or their team be put in danger just so they can try to talk someone down.
They know when they can try to negotiate, and when it's out of the question, and, in this situation, that's where the line between being naive and simply hopeful is.
Something else that makes me quite uncomfortable is the frequent attempts to "fix" her by making her more emotional and expressive.
Her stoicism and "lack of emotion" are not inherently negative, in that they are an aspect of her personality, and removing them changes who she is. And while the role she has forced herself into does hurt her, I believe the way she acts stems heavily from her natural personality, rather than an act.
I often see her being portrayed as far more prone to emotional outbursts, laughing relatively often, having sarcastic remarks or being very flirty, and while this is often just the mís-characterization that comes from being a new writer, it's telling how this is something that occurs specifically in the heavily autistic-coded character of the show.
The third option is villainizing her. I most often see this in relation to his treatment of Arcee, specifically her need for revenge and trauma.
As I've already stated, Optimus is a hopeful person. He hopes, above all, that there's always a right path, a way to do things that's morally and logically the best. He has a sense of this greater good he's always working towards, always trying to follow, and I feel that while this does impair his judgment at times, it's by far not enough to make him an evil person.
His disagreement with Arcee stems from this idea of the greater good- that forgiveness is the key, that revenge is always bad and placing yourself on your enemy's level is to be avoided at all costs. If you're kind to your enemies, if you show them mercy, surely they'll treat you the same, right?
Whether it be against Starscream or Airachnid, defenseless or in battle, Arcee should not exact her revenge as it would accomplish nothing.
Optimus directly contradicts this sentiment later on by almost killing a defenseless Megatron. However, I don't think Optimus was lying or trying to manipulate Arcee by his earlier statement. Rather, I think, Optimus is forced to rethink his stance on the killing of a defenseless enemy if it means preventing future harm. At this moment, Megatron is at his mercy, and given all he's done and will likely do in the future if left alive, Optimus chooses to end it right there, even if his attempt is unsuccessful.
In the end, I think Optimus is far from naive, hypocritical or evil- he's simply flawed. He wants to do the right thing, and though he makes mistakes, they are honest mistakes, coming from a place of care and hope, rather than malice.
One last thing I want to talk about is Optimus' relationship to Megatron.
Megatron hates Optimus, that's pretty clear. He hates them for taking away his title, for their 'for the greater good' stance, for their forgiveness and wisdom and for the way they care about others and want to see the best in people.
Optimus' feelings, on the other hand, feel much more complex.
On one hand, he's aware of the danger Megatron poses. He's aware of the destruction the War has already caused and of the threat it poses for as long as Megatron is alive and able to enact his will.
Optimus understands that Megatron must be stopped, but this is where things get complicated.
He does want, and tries, to stop Megatron, but is in constant conflict with himself over how to achieve this. He's hesitant to kill Megatron at the start, even during battle, he mourns Megatron's 'death' in the first few episodes.
He wants to reason his way out of the conflict, because he still hopes that Megatron could see reason.
I've detailed their relationship more here, as it's a very interesting dynamic and I think it should be talked about outside of the context of shipping.
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more tales from the gas station propaganda! i personally would recommend checking out the web series as well as the books honestly - the books are a lot more detailed but the web series is still interesting! if you only read one of em 100% go for the books but they're still pretty neat together and also feature some differences (and an entry or two that didn't make it into the books)! it also felt more immersive to me to read the web series and then read the book, where jack talks about the blog/writing it. i personally started with the web series and moved onto the books afterward, and recommend doing that since it can drag a bit more if you read the books first (since a lot of the web series content is featured in the books). i found it most useful to read the web series + side stories, the books, and then the spinoff/side story bedside manor! the web series is more comedic than horror, though the books also lean more towards comedy in the first half.
anyway, in terms of actual propaganda - alongside the actual plot being really good, the characters are a big highlight! the prev propaganda went into it a bit, but the cast is endlessly fun. jack, the main character, has very dry humor and ends up kind of being "the straight man" of the more eccentric cast, but he's very fun bc unlike a lot of characters who fit that trope, he's JUST as weird and unhinged as the rest of the cast in his own way. his best friend (from book 2 onward at least), jerry (the blonde himbo) is the most chaotically hilarious character - deeply impulsive, wildly overly affectionate with everyone, weird fun fashion, unbothered by functionally everything, and basically just a human puppy given murderous tendencies. he and jack are also deeply pathetic (i say this affectionately).
there's also rosa, one of jack's coworkers in a later book with a massive crush on him (that he's fully oblivious to), is just a ball of sunshine and the only real competent employee; she's also fully unaware of the supernatural shit going on and is Very stressed over it </3 book 4 especially gives her fantastic characterization. o'brien is the local sheriff on gas station duty from book 2 onward (she basically cleans up any shit that goes on at the gas station) and is a little standoffish at first, but gets attached to jack and the rest of the crew pretty quickly (though she tends to show it more through endless nicknames and doing everything she can to keep the cast of idiots safe); she cares a Lot and actually puts effort into trying to keep the town safe and figure out what the fuck is happening
and that's just the main four characters! all of the side characters are also really good - spencer, the murderous stalker who has it out for jack, brick roscoe & brick roscoe, two agents of an unknown organization who cover up supernatural shit, benjamin, an insanely tough monster hunter/survivalist tired of everyone's shit, agatha, a cool old lady with a massive monster truck.. really, there's no shortage of fun characters
also! it's a pretty diverse series, with multiple canonically queer characters (even of the main cast, jack is ace + jerry is bi), physical disability rep, characters of color, and ofc mentally ill characters (again including jack himself) - alongside many people seeing jerry as coded (and potentially canonically?) adhd and jack as coded autistic
i will say that it's important to keep in mind there's a LOT of triggering content - alongside the horror stuff, which includes gore/body horror, unreality, paranoia fuel, torture, kidnapping, stalking, and more, there's also a LOT of discussion of abuse/child abuse and the series doesn't shy away from the bigotry the cast often faces (in particular warning for racism, ableism, and homophobia + slurs), and unfortunately there's also a decent amount of fatphobia in the series. i would 100% recommend the series, but do be warned that it's very heavy, especially towards the end
like the other person said the series is all available in audio format, both through audiobooks and youtube reading of the series! i'm not sure if the books are in any libraries but they're also all available to buy online, and obviously the web series is free to read on reddit and the tales from the gas station website. it's a bit of a long read (i get through books fast and it still took me a good week or two to get through everything even marathon-reading it) but it's worth it imo!
^
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I can't help but feel like all of this defense of Bianca is purely due to ableism that F1 fans themselves have but don't realize.
The amount of times I've seen people try to pull the "I can't be racist because I have black/brown friends/relatives" card and still have to face consequences, yet she uses her autistic brother as a prop to claim she can't be ableist and people are suddenly like "omg best apology ever, we support our queen."
No. I am autistic. I've gotten bullied for it for much of my life. I don't appreciate seeing Bianca continuing that bullying by encouraging the use of autism as an insult, and I especially don't like her using someone who is autistic to try to cover up her behavior. People need accountability if they're going to learn, and so far her version of "taking accountability" has just been "I'm just a girl, just a kid, only 18, I didn't know better" which luckily she deleted, and then using her autistic brother to try to gain PR brownie points after insulting people with autism.
And I KNOW F1 is full of ableism, not just on twitter but on here too. Hell, I was ranting to a F1 friend maybe a month ago about a post someone made on here about how they didn't like Lando solely because they thought he was neurodivergent but he was too privileged to have to mask his neurodivergent behavior and I just? Girl what in the fucking ableism. Do people realize how exhausting "masking neurodivergent behavior" is? And that post had about a dozen notes - not of people calling it out, but of people agreeing with it. Lance gets the majority of it, but I've also seen people use autism to insult Logan too. He isn't in F1 anymore, but I saw it all the time with Latifi too. Like fucking stop chalking up disliking people to "omg i don't like them because they exhibit behaviors that i associate with autism," that's fucking gross and insulting!!!
Idk I'm tired of reading how I'm anti-women or anti-POC for not immediately accepting her apology and jumping right back in to supporting her. She needs to do a LOT of self-reflecting and attitude changing, as do motorsport fans in general given a lot of responses to this situation. Ableism isn't cool, cute, funny, etc. (Also looking at the fans who repost that RocketPoweredMohawk YouTuber's clips in the tags on Tumblr too. The guy's biggest punchline is "HAHAHAHA lance autistic" yet F1 fans worship the ground he walks on and treats him like peak comedy. Please, find an actual sense of humor that doesn't involve making people with disabilities the punchline of your jokes). It's getting old. It's not funny or quirky or edgy. It's exhausting to constantly run into reminders that most of these people I'm interacting with in my online spaces would never accept me and would probably just bully me if I ever came across them in real life. 🙃
Thank you for saying all of this. I genuinely didn’t even know this was a line of ~commentary (ew) on Lance or Logan. It’s absolutely disgusting. I feel like we’re only just getting to a point where people even understand autism (and let’s be clear…they still don’t lol not really) but shit like this is so gross and only forces autistic people even further into the margins of society. I’m really sorry the fandom is like this. You deserve to take up as much space as you need, and the rest of us need to hold ableists accountable.
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Izuku - the human hero
How perception controls the mind
(quick warning, I put this in a doc and its 15 pages without images. Be warned that it will take a solid amount of time reading. Get comfy)
How to be a hero
Before we get right into the thick of this, I wanted to explain what exactly makes someone a hero. For this, I'm gonna have to explain what makes cops inherently flawed. (This is also gonna get political, so if you like cops and don't wanna read about someone who does not like them, click off now. I'm not afraid to throw around the word "pig" for a non animal. You will be blocked if you try to argue with me. Also I am speaking about this as someone who lives in a major city in the US, so if you, again, try to argue with me, you. will. be. blocked. I don’t care about your liberal opinions)
Cops have three purposes, making people feel safer, making sure major events or protests don't go haywire, and keeping people in the prison system. (for economic benefits that those systems provide. Aka free labor) The thing that separates real life cops from heroes, are that heroes are legitimately needed as they do community service and deescalation along with taking care of villains. (even if they aren't trained on deescalation which I dislike. *cough cough* katsuki *cough cough*) Plus, they are given twice as much training as a cop is, as cops aren't trained on much compared to UA. They have to have a high school diploma, 21 weeks of cop school, and a few rigorous tests. (source)
But let's get back on track. So, heroes do five things as a part of their job. To make citizens feel safer, make sure protests/events don't go haywire, community service, deescalation, and stop villains from hurting people/property. They are put through three years of training at a hero school and pass their provisional licensing exam. It also seems like it's required to take work studies and class 1-A just took them really early. They're also highly regulated when it comes to use of their quirks and detaining villains.
But there's more to it than that. How well you did in your tests for UA is entirely dictated by the people around you. Well not entirely, but we're human. We thrive on other people's approval, because it's in our very nature. We need support, gear, and the right training to be able to do what we want to do in life.
Theoretical, quirkless heroes
As we've established, heroes need three things. They need gear, support, and training. Gear can be anything from a support item that allows their quirk to function (like aoyama's belly lazer) to the quirk itself, like in izuku's case. The thing that stops a quirkless hero is the fundamentals that they lack that the rest of the world already has... according to the able bodied people in hero society. Because, let's be honest here, there is more to getting into a hero school than getting a quirk.
Let's use Katsuki as an example. He had the perfect quirk, perfect financial background, friends, teachers, but no mentor. Though it seems more like Katsuki trained near constantly in order to become a hero. As best jeanist said, he DOES actually have the skills to become a full fledged sidekick already, he just lacks discipline. No mentor. That's what UA is for most people, the time in which they get a mentor. A quirk is not everything, because you need to have the smarts or the empathy for the people you're saving. That is what holds Katsuki back and pushes Izuku forward, empathy.
Empathy isn't really controllable though to some extent, especially if you don't have any to begin with. Katsuki and Izuku both have autism, but Izuku has hyper empathy and Katsuki has low empathy. That just means that Katsuki needs to learn the basic steps of SHOWING empathy as a hero to the people he is saving. Technically that just means he needs to learn how to mask better, but yeah, depending on the job masking can be so important. That's why we even have the innate ability as autistic people, for survival. We're allowed to use it in a way that is healthy to both us and others. But it's OUR choice, not anyone else's.
Getting back on track, most of the opportunities would have been taken away from Katsuki if he had a useless quirk and/or no quirk at all. THAT'S the true difference between Katsuki and Izuku.
If izuku the quirkless hero were to happen, then izuku would have needed unquestionable support from someone. That would have vastly changed his overall likelihood of getting into UA. Not only that but, as stated in the anime, quirkless people weren't even ALLOWED to go to UA up until Izuku's application year.
So the thing that stops a quirkless hero from becoming a reality is the perception of other people and the opportunities that they provide. Katsuki would have been phenomenal training for Izuku, maybe some sort of sponser for his support items, and the support from the people around him would have given Izuku the tools to succeed. But quirkless people aren't given that. THAT, my friends, is why the quirkless hero Izuku would have failed.
What is a quirk?
Quirks are a fickle thing because of how inconsistent they are. It makes understanding their impact so difficult. Before I explain how quirk discrimination works, I think it's important to properly define a quirk.
Let's group quirks into three groups: mutant, non mutant, and both. I think what defines a mutant quirk is anyone who has "physical characteristics". That can include anything from the change in hair color to being a pile of sludge. (like the sludge villain)
A non mutant quirk is anything that does NOT fit the original definition but is still a quirk. So pretty much anything non physical, like Uraraka's "zero gravity" or Aizawa's "erasure". Their physical appearance has no affect from the quirk they have.
And our third quirk type is never actually defined in the series even if it has the basis to be its own group. It could be anything from not affecting how their quirk works like Koda and how he seems to be "tree like", or be an ingrained part of their quirk as a whole. Like Tsuyu.
So that could mean that if mina didn't produce acid, then her quirk could have just been that she looks like an alien. This could be the same with kirishima's quirk because he has sharp teeth. That also makes you question that if part of inko's quirk is that she has green hair (a mutant quirk since it changes appearance), then izuku's quirk is actually that he has green hair. If ofa powers up any quirk it possesses, and it can't actually do anything to izuku's theoretical "quirk", then if the power was given to, lets say, Tsu, then her normal quirk would be unaffected. Maybe her poisonous mucus would be heightened, I could see that, but then wouldn't her "actual quirk" be that she produces mucus instead of just "frog"? Like mina's quirk, because the fact that she is pink seems to have nothing to do with her actual quirk.
Maybe the actual name of a quirk/how you define it is up to the person who owns it. Like quirks are up to the perception of yourself. Shigaraki's quirk is called "decay", but it could also very well be "disintegrate". In fact, that is MORE accurate to how his quirk works. But because he is a villain, he probably just named his quirk "decay" to seem more menacing.
So, quirks are up to perception, seems pretty similar to how heroes function right?
Disability
So, in a society that is even fundamentally discriminative, even towards people with quirks, where does that leave quirkless people?
We're gonna have to use our imagination a bit with how quirklessness is actually treated in MHA. (obligatory "hori why did you build up this plot line sm and then do close to nothing with it") There's few actual information we're given, and most of it is through a kid who was so discriminative because of his inferiority complex. So, let's make a list.
The most obvious one, but obviously being prone to bullying and teasing
Not being able to go to UA(?) up until izuku's application year
Less support from those around you (teachers, parents, other kids, or even heroes)
Doctors inherently see them as "underdeveloped" because they also don't have the "newer/more efficient" bodies that quirked people have (... tbh this just sounds like eugenics is openly accepted in the medical field in MHA so uh-)
Being quirkless is automatically seen as "weak" in mha, by both quirked and quirkless people
Most of this is about perception. And while systemic oppression is terrible to experience, perception can create a constant cycle of gas-lighting for the people who experience it. For example, while there are no direct laws that stop a trans person from getting medical care here in the US, (depending on the state) yet it's still extremely hard to get the resources. It IS a systemic problem in the way that capitalism is inherently set up to fail, but not a direct one. A person could say that a micro aggression from a white person to a POC is just because they're sensitive or looking into it too much. But god forbid it be actual oppression to touch someone's hair unasked for! Or ask someone where they're from even when they say the US! No, instead you're just "taking away from actual oppression" or "looking for things that aren't there". (as said in my bio I am white so feel free to critique this on anything I may have gotten wrong or you feel should not have been said)
For oppression to work, it must not be visible from the oppressors point of view. This will keep those who live in blissful ignorance from giving their support to a group that experiences it, while keeping white people from being uncomfortable.
From Izuku and possibly Inko's point of view, it may even be harder to get certain medical care. Technically it shouldn't even affect his schooling since use of quirks aren't even allowed in public unless you're a licensed hero, yet his teachers/students make it a point to make his life hell for his genetics.
MHA is inherently flawed due to eugenicists that were born as a result of heroes.
MHA is entirely about perception, from how heroes don't understand why capable citizens choose not to be heroes, to the villains who don't understand why those who were oppressed become heroes. Izuku was given ofa to be the dramatic irony of it all. The quirkless person has become a hero but at the cost of feeding into the environment that creates the very thing he fights.
Color theory/character design
One of the most important fundamentals of a visual story are the designs that the story chooses. And something I have always adored about mha specifically (especially in comparison to other anime and manga) is how strong the character designs are. Same face syndrome is almost non-existent in my hero, mainly because horikoshi knows EXACTLY how to make each character he designs distinct. (Same face syndrome is just when an artist draws characters with very similar faces for everyone. Studio ghibli often has this issue which is why they have characters that look the same from completely different movies) He also has a strong sense of color theory and knows EXACTLY how to make a character's colors tell more into their story than we think.
Take Nighteye. Weird choice of an example, I know, but he has one of the most intelligently well put together designs in the show.
This is the anime so please bear with the lanky hands problem. When you look at Nighteye you know EXACTLY WHAT his character will be like. He is a serious, well put together man, yet he has spots on his perfect and professional red tie. This shows his need for laughter in the heroic world, yet also shows his professionalism. He also wears a white suit, something that seems a bit odd for hero work since it would get dirty, but it also plays into his ideals for laughter and goofiness and hiding that behind a professional aura. Horikoshi knew EXACTLY what he was doing with every aspect of this design. Even down to the slight heel of his shoe, or the slight lankiness of his nature. When you look at Nighteye, you get a sense of professional intimidation and outright oddness.
And this isn't even covering the color theory aspect of his character. His hair is such a clever choice, using the yellow in his hair to both symbolize mirio and All Might, and making those aspects highlights. Because they are the highlights of his person. How he brings out the good in the characters around him. While also making his hair color an off, more swampy/murky green compared to Izuku's. Showing he is the shadow in his life at that point, while also being his parallel.
When you break down the fundamentals of a character design, you can start to make sense of who they are
Now that I've broken down a character design, you can see that the aspects of both Katsuki and Izuku's characters directly reflect their designs. I'm also going to say that I will only be commenting on hero costume design OR if their civilian clothes are consistent, like in small might's case. Civilian clothes aren't really made to do anything but make a joke or just be placeholders since it doesn't really matter. (like izuku's "sheets" t-shirt)
Izuku's design
We're gonna start with his color, of course; green. Green can mean a lot of things, from envy to new growth.
What makes the color green so special to Izuku's design is that it paints a picture of something so weak yet so strong. Something so alive, so human. There are a million and one things a color can mean, but what makes the color of a character so special is the consistency of that color. So while it does represent Izuku's rebirth into becoming someone strong;
"I'm the deku who always does his best" - coming soon for the psychoanalysis.
He is also weak. He is as strong as an oak tree, yet as weak as a daisy. And that's okay. That doesn't make him not a hero.
Green itself is also something nurturing, it's why he's so good with kids and, once again, the one with hyper empathy out of both of them. Deku and Kacchan. Midoriya and Bakugou. Izuku and Katsuki.
And on the flip side, Katsuki's color is so so SO fascinating from a color theory nerds perspective. His color is loud, outstanding, brash, strong, and most importantly, represents work. Hard, tedious, work. (I feel like I should also mention to give credit to where credit is due, most of color and general art imagery comes from paganistic religions throughout the world. So, it's important to remember the people that came up with the ideas we use and to respect everyone's beliefs. Because we sure as hell wouldn't have half of the culture we have today without those religions throughout history that may or may not be dead. A lot of it was lost with colonization, but they do still exist)
It's a color that exudes enthusiasm, creativity, success, and much much more. It can also be a color that represents impatience, dominance, and exhibitionism. It is a strong color, through and through, and it's the exact opposite to green.
The fact that orange and green are also secondary colors is important, showing the parallels between the two.
Why am I bringing this up? WHY is this so important? Well my friends, the answer is simple.
Izuku and Katsuki's colors are how they perceive themselves.
Izuku thinks he has two separate sides, even though they are one in the same. He is either the weak deku or the strong deku. The deku that always does his best. The deku too weak to stand out on his own. While Katsuki thinks of himself highly, he is either treated like a god or looked down on. He is always strong, always loud, always running ahead.
Even though neither of these perceptions are correct.
Izuku's bullying
Psychologically speaking, your childhood dictates a majority of your mental well being as an adult and how you react to a situation. It is the most influential part of a person's life. This can, of course, change as you gain more experience in life and possibly go through something traumatic whatever that may be. Your brain has some built in coping skills that we honestly have no clue why we do them?
As an example, my coping skills as a child became my imagination and escapism through shows or other media, while my sibling learned to disassociate from their emotions and childhood. Ultimately, even though I'm the younger out of the two of us, they don't remember our trauma but I do. And that's just, how it ended up working out. Some people try to take control of their trauma by writing about it, or by reading it. All three of these options have their good and bad sides. It just depends on the extremes of these coping skills.
Either way, because of how influential your childhood is, it's kind of important that your parents don't mess it up to the best of their abilities. This isn't always controllable though, which is why we're here, talking about Izuku's bullying.
Let's define what exactly Izuku went through. (obligatory tw for bullying/mentions of suicide)
Ah, the most memorable, the swan dive scene. I've talked about my thoughts on this scene multiple times, but to give a little rundown on my analysis here, this is supposed to be the worst thing Katsuki ever does. So, let's address a couple of things here.
Izuku is not sad, he's angry. They are both emotionally stunted in this scene, not even giving themselves the opportunity to process their emotions about this entire situation.
On one hand, the emotional part of this, both of them are actually having the same reaction. They are turning despair and insecurity into anger. The thing with anger is that it is a secondary emotion. They are just emotions that are born out of other feelings, so anger is super common because it feels better to be angry than it is to feel hurt.
I feel it is also important to address that every emotion is important to let yourself feel. Bottling up anything will end up making you explode later in the long run, and that includes anger. Secondary emotion =/= a bad emotion, it just means you should be aware of where the true feelings come from so that you can process it.
And on the other hand, the psychological part, Izuku's biggest concern is that Katsuki becomes a hero. Of course he does actually care about himself; no matter how many times people want to say that Izuku doesn't have a backbone, he does and he has since the first episode. The thing that stops him is Katsuki's threat. (Which, btw, was that a bait?? Was he even gonna do anything?????)
But I personally think the most interesting part about Izuku's bullying from Katsuki and his lackeys is this moment. It goes overlooked all the time, even though it's actually the most accurate descriptor of his bullying and also shows the moment Katsuki's reasons for bullying Izuku change. Before this, Katsuki put distance which turned into bullying because Izuku was weak and quirkless. He was better than him, why should he be around him? He was too clingy and kept on reaching out his hand. He was calling me weak.
But Katsuki knew how strong he was! That's why he put so much distance, he was looking down on Izuku for being stupid. Sure it affected his insecurities, but this panel right here? This was the first time he ever thought that Izuku's "thoughts" might actually be true. Which lead to rejection, bullying, and hate.
So now that we've established the actual bullying, how did this affect Izuku? Well, of course, it affected his self esteem. Izuku's self worth is basically on the ground or slightly raised throughout the manga. It was due to other people too, sure, like All Might, his mom, Iida, etc. but that doesn't change Katsuki's actions.
And this self esteem problem is so built into his very being that even when someone like Uraraka comes along, someone who helps him build his confidence, only ended up creating another version of himself he can compare to. Instead of being the weak deku Katsuki assigned him, he's now the deku that always does his best. And if he does anything that won't kill him or bring him close to death, he is the weak little deku again. He's everything Katsuki told him he was in middle school.
His perception of himself is so distorted, that he's only now picking up the pieces
This isn't Katsuki slander, Katsuki on his own has grown into a person who's assured of himself and others. He aims to be the light in Izuku's life and has atoned, apologized, and been forgiven. He had a phenomenal redemption arc and he constantly aims to fix this problem. But this isn't about his actions, this is about Izuku. So I expect 0% slander of Katsuki, All Might, or Inko.
The most ironic part about Katuski's death is that Izuku has been the one with death flags on him since the beginning. Death has always been an integral part of his character, and Katsuki's has always had the plot armor that he would let him stay alive. One of Izuku's first scenes is of Katsuki telling him to kill himself. We've already KNOWN deku's reaction to Katsuki's death. Izuku has always seen Katsuki in life or death situations, kidnapped, saw him get plunged through his body, but Katsuki? He barely saw it once.
No, scratch that, twice. His vigilante arc and his fight with shigaraki during the first war.
This is why Katsuki's "death" is so clever. Horikoshi AGAIN flipped it on its head. Deku is always the one in dangerous situations; he's downright suicidal when people are in danger. We've seen Izuku almost destroy all of Matsutafu over Katsuki being hurt. But we haven't seen Katsuki's reaction to Izuku's outbursts over him, nor have we seen the reaction to his possible demise.
Inko Midoriya - Izuku's first insecurity
Of all the people I've listed that have had an impact on Izuku, the first one to ever hurt him was inko. Inko may only have a few scenes, yet they are able to tell a much bigger story into who she is and how she is flawed. Everyone had their own major individual impact on him, so let's talk about why her impact is so unique.
Inko Midoriya, my my what an interesting woman you are. Something I actually adore about every parental figure in MHA is that none of them are perfect. They all have flaws, subtle or not. They are all good and bad even in the short time in which we see them. Endeavor, Rei, Inko, Mitsuki, Masaru; hell even whoever "Hisashi" is because while he supports them financially, he's never actually there. (if dad for one is confirmed canon which I think it most definitely will then I'll go into the reasons why he has "good" parental aspects in a different post)
Now, I can hear you asking the question, "well, what's wrong with Inko?" because inko is supposed to be this nice, nurturing woman that makes Izuku this little "momma's boy" archetype. And you're right! You could make the argument that Inko is possibly the best or one of the best parents in the series. But she is still that, a parent.
Parents are flawed, they're human. They are gonna mess up majorly in some way somehow and that's just how the world works. The best we can do is that, our best. We should always strive to change and grow as people in the moment, which is precisely what Inko does. She grew. Because her most major flaw was giving up on Izuku, she gave up on his dream. Quirkless heroes are possible, they always were, but perception and access to materials and knowledge is hard! And I'm not saying it's easy or anything, or even that Horikoshi should've taken that narrative. I actually love ofa and what it's done for Izuku's character.
What I am saying though is that Inko was the first person to not believe in him.
She was the first person he had to prove himself to, and only did so when he suddenly had a quirk and got into UA. She never stopped him, but she also never gave him her full moral support.
A major developmental impact parents have on children is how they choose when and how to support them. Even if you know your child can't be a mermaid, it's still extremely important that you assure them of their dreams. Not doing so can cause problems. This can include an immediate idea that you are not enough when you're older, general insecurity issues, and make you sensitive to rejection. It's setting them up for settling on something that they don't want to do which will make them unhappy adults, or just straight up stop them from taking the steps to do, well, anything.
Choosing whether to make your passions a career or not should be a choice you make on your own, not something that was shut down from you as a child. Izuku had no support, he is his only support. He even says so!
Because not even inko believed in him, and she was his only support system.
This is not Inko slander by the way! Because this is even an addressed problem in the series. She Apologizes to Izuku a little after he gets into UA if I remember correctly.
She did fail him, but that doesn't make her a bad person. It was bad and it just happened. There is no excuse, she just made up for her mistakes. Which is a continuous correlation throughout the series; no excuses or explanations. It just happened. And that's okay. She's a phenomenal parent and deserves to be praised for what she's done for him as his mother. She is amazing.
Uraraka - the hero for heroes
On the totally other side of the spectrum, I almost feel like Uraraka's looks are a visual representation of who Inko should've been. Because, like people have pointed out, Inko and Uraraka's looks are SO SIMILAR! Like it's almost uncanny. This isn't a Freud™ moment, (or at least I hope it's not) I think this is simple parallels.
Let's take a look at Uraraka so you get what I mean. (this is going to be very brief since I still wanna make a similar post about her, so yeah, this only covers her relationship to Izuku. Sorry lol) Right off the batt, she is his supporter. She supports his rivalry with Katsuki, fighting against a "bully" in her eyes. (I'll be covering this idea in her analysis btw) She even makes sure he has "good luck" by not letting him fall on his first day, TWICE! She is his first supporter and first friend in UA, a title he never had to earn by being "amazing". And at that moment she’s exactly who he needs. Someone who will build up his confidence in battle, saving, and general hero work.
Something I feel like people don’t understand is that Izuku needed Uraraka way more than she needed Izuku. And I don’t mean that in a way that he never actually did anything for her, rather that she made most of the conclusions about the flaws of society on her own. She came to the conclusion about toga without Izuku. Without anyone else directly telling her, OTHER THAN TOGA! She put together the pieces. She is neither the love interest nor Izuku's number one fan/supporter; she is her own independent person with her own flaws and ideas. She has her own goals, saving those who may not "look" or be "worthy" of needing saving. Like toga, like Izuku.
He was her inspiration, but she is now confident and smart enough to see Izuku's flaws and to believe in herself. Just as she was his main support to fall back on, and now he is able to confide in the people around him. He is confident enough to build a support system to help him.
Because men are not the inspiration for women to be strong, and women are not the support for their strength.
I think it's time to put away these very obvious patriarchal ideas. Building a new system throughout shonen to view women and queerness is important, because I'm tired of seeing men be inspirational and women be their support. Let's switch it up a bit, let women and men be friends; let them coexist without them being solely for the mc's arc. Let them be their own character.
Back to parallels with Inko, Uraraka was basically his sole support system along with Iida for a long time. Inko AND Uraraka being his only support was unhealthy in all aspects, you should never feel like you have to rely on one person to help you keep going. Izuku was still independent, but thank god for All Might and later on Katsuki for being his support in getting better.
All Might - "you can be a hero"
Now, I know that title is a little weird, but it's true! All Might was the first person to both believe in him and say he could be a hero.
I’ve seen a lot of slander on All Might and I feel like it’s a little unprompted? Like yes, crushing a kids dreams and leaving him on a rooftop and telling him to “knock until someone opened the door” isn’t like the BEST idea in the world. I get that. I understand it.
But at the same time, can you really BLAME HIM? In his mind, the only reason he is a hero is because of ofa. The reason why Katsuki and All Might are so similar has to do with the fact that they both define themselves by their quirk. A perfect example is when AM is talking to aizawa about losing his quirk.
It’s interesting seeing his thought process change and gain confidence in himself after talking to stain. All might had the same perception the rest of the world had, so of course he’s going to react the same way anyone else would.
All Might has not been quirkless for a long time
That has vastly changed his perception of both Izuku and himself. He saw ofa as apart of what made him great, not as an add on to an already great person.
Does this excuse his actions? NO! Of course it’s still BAD. I can admit that All Might supporters often excuse this behavior through ignorance. He’s still an adult and mentor and he’s had the time to learn, but there’s also an ignorant mentality from society as a whole.
And he had a point did he not? Being quirkless in hero work is still dangerous. Heroes are just glorified police. Hero work is not for quirkless people for a reason. That’s fine. I understand that. And like I said before, I don’t think horikoshi should’ve taken that rout of story telling! Ofa gives you more room to work with.
What I am talking about though, is how this mentality affects a child. Imagine being told as a kid, everyone BUT YOU, can have your dream? Everyone can be your idol, EXCEPT YOU. That’s traumatizing! It causes an inherent “otherness” in people.
Izuku still probably would’ve ended up a vigilante if he didn’t get a quirk and get into UA. Which is infinitely more dangerous than a hero because you can’t ask for backup or get immediate medical help in the field. Izuku needed to be a hero if he was going to be safe.
However, all might is the first person to EVER, give Izuku the confidence he needed. He told him what he needed to hear, told him he could be a hero. That he could fulfill his dream.
He made Izuku’s pipe dream a reality through training him and giving him his quirk. So yeah, I love all might, Izuku loves all might, he’s what Izuku needed most; a mentor and someone who believed in him.
The human hero - a psycho analysis
Wow we’re almost to the end! This bullet point was actually what started this entire analysis on Izuku. It was the first thing I wanted to make into a meta and then I just kept adding and going and.. now we’re here. It’s kind of bittersweet since this has become part of my routine, to get home from school and work on this ginormous essay for fun. But, here we are. Welcome to the end friends. I hope you enjoyed. Psycho analysis is something I hope I’m good at, but maybe I’m just pointing out the obvious lol.
I wanna start with his anger issues and where they come from. I’ve seen people time and time again say that it’s only Katsuki who has the anger issues, but I think you forget that this is an emotionally stunted boy in his teen years. It’s kind of hard NOT to have them at this stage in life. But where do they come from?
Ever heard of the term “emotionally immature”? It’s usually born out of a traumatic event of some kind. Generally, after getting to know someone you can make a rough estimate of when this person stunted in maturity.
Emotional immaturity is different from mental immaturity, and I need to get that out of the way. Mental maturity is simply just, how you respond to life based on your past experiences. Emotional maturity is your immediate response. Think of it like a conscious vs a subconscious response. And a lot of the time this is where anger issues stem from. Along with a lot of your own self doubt and insecurity.
It’s definitely important to analyze our emotions and it’s a skill people have to learn, but that doesn’t mean we shouldn’t sit in the actual feeling of that emotion. Coping skills are great but they’re there to be temporary solutions to the bigger issue at hand. You have to sit and work through your emotions like you were supposed to the first time and that fucking sucks. I know I try not to curse when I do these analysis’ but it really does! You literally feel like you’re going through it all over again sometimes, but it’s what you have to do so you can mature emotionally.
And did Izuku ever do this? No, he didn’t. He did hero analysis or something else with his time. He used his interests or hobbies as a way to escape his problems with his dad, the bullying, and then again when Katsuki got kidnapped or when Katsuki was stabbed by shigaraki. He never got the chance to sit down and just, write about it. Sit in it. Work through them.
Oh but I can hear you saying, “yeah but how does he have anger issues?” My friend, what do you think those tears are for? Because it’s not just sadness or happiness. He’s angry. He repeatedly gets angry.
He’s pissed! And for good reason! But he is not outwardly pissed. Because if he was for most of his life, he was bullied even more. Izuku is in the position of not having the power, ever. And that created issues. With control, identity, and regulating emotions. He’s supposed to have been able to outwardly share his emotions throughout childhood so he could regulate when he was in crisis, but he didn’t. He learned to regulate his actions and bottle everything up so that it could explode at a later time. But when he came to UA? Things were different.
He started to mature again, emotionally. He was allowed and given the space to go full anger issues mode, so now every time he gets fired up in battle and tries to act like Katsuki, he explodes. Bigger than Katsuki now, because he never regulated his emotions correctly. (See more in ochako and Katsuki’s post because I’ll be getting back to this later)
And, this is not me villainizing any of Izuku’s emotions or responses. Ofc you should never invalidate anyones emotions. Not only are they justified in a lot of scenes, but they’re also not necessarily his fault.
What I AM saying though, is that unless there is a bigger issue, people do not get that angry during a match. Not even Katsuki got that angry until todoroki literally gave up the battle by not giving it his all like Izuku did or what HE even did during their match.
He got SO upset when shinsou called ojirou a monkey that he almost threw the match.
People didn’t get that angry during a match! At all! Not Ochako, Tokoyami, todoroki, and or even KATSUKI BAKUGOU, MR. ANGER ISSUES, got that angry!
Frustration is very different from anger. Very, very different. I think the subtlety of Izuku and his character just adds to it, because you have to really look for it to get an accurate understanding of him and his character.
The perception of others changes you
It’s only human nature for the perception of others to affect you. It’s normal, expected even. We’re social creatures, we conform to societal standards.
But when those standards get too high, or they’re made to make you feel small, it only hurts other people. It only hurts Izuku and his mental well being.
Trauma changes you (haha see, we’re finally getting back to that image of deku hitting shigaraki that I said would be referenced here!!!) and in Izuku’s case, he learned that getting closer to Katsuki made him act and feel a certain way. Romantic feelings is my personal opinion, and whether he knows what those feelings are or aren’t is up to you.
I talked about this in an ask before, but Ochako creating a new meaning of the word "deku" for Izuku only created a person he could separate himself from. If he is not the deku that does his best, then he is the useless deku all over again. There is no in between for him. (once again more autistic coding with the black and white thinking that he has)
This is very subtle, and that’s purposeful. A conscious writing decision to make sure that you, the reader, would not know his inner thoughts and turmoil.
He’s both emotionally immature, and emotionally separated from his peers, all might, and his mom. He has put himself in the position of being alone because it is all he knows.
Finally - perception
So, why does horikoshi keep most of his character relatively secretive? What would be the point other than to just, reveal it? You’re given all the pieces to put everything together so what’s the point in not even saying anything.
One key factor: izu//ocha. I have to ask the question, if you were to create a story that was secretly a queer story in disguise so that it could break an industry in some way, how would you do it? Personally, I would keep the main character and their love interests thoughts relatively secretive, give the pretend love interest confirmed feelings to confuse the viewer, and make the main character say vague statements that seem romantic. I would also make the two seem plain and maybe a little unlikable in some way even though the story is supposed to be about the character and his relationship to other people.
Which is exactly what horikoshi has done. He has used the perception of the viewer to say a bigger statement about how the viewer consumes storytelling. This is called “readers perception”, it’s one of the key aspects of how you choose to write a story. If the viewer was given all the information at once, it would be a boring story. So as a writer you need to choose what, when, and how you will show the reader information.
Horikoshi has an amazing understanding of this. But it’s also a really common writing issue! Steven universe is too tied to its main character, completely keeping the viewers perception of the story in solely stevens perception. But mha is never TIED to a main character and can therefore switch everything up so that you and Izuku have a completely different set of information while still FOLLOWING him as the main character.
And we keep coming back to this same topic; perception. Is it really so hard to believe that My Hero Academia has always been about the perception of others? From insecurity, to pride, it has made it a point to never let the characters make a perception of their own. Of themselves. Something healthy to view and understand. To the point where it even uses the perception of the viewer against you. Against the characters. Against the real life consequences of the world. My Hero has always been a show about proving perceptions to be wrong.
Your perception about how a shonen should work will change as MHA uses its platform and ideas to make a new for the industry. Not only will it create a space for minorities in a place that has actively excluded them, but it will also drive away or even change the opinions of the already existing people in them.
Stay hopeful. Keep your indomitable human spirit thriving in all parts of your life.
(I’m for some reason attached to these notes of how I organized this so it’s staying lol)
How to be a hero
Theoretical, quirkless heroes
What is a quirk?
Disability
Color theory/character design (izuku vs katsuki)
Izuku's bullying
uraraka, all might, katsuki, inko
The human hero - a psychoanalysis
#wow having a computer is nice#like i actually put in the time to make my thoughts comprehensible lmfao#its a treat#ill probably do a post on ochako next (mostly bc im excited to talk about her color theory) but thatll take a while#This has taken me a month to make and its so bittersweet finishing it but yeah hcieuhcieuchi pls enjoy it theres so much love I put in#midoriya izuku#mha deku#bkdk#bkdk brainrot#bakugou katsuki#bakudeku#bnha deku#mha analysis#deku midoriya#mha bakugou#togachako brainrot#brainrot#bakugou x deku#decchan#katsuki x izuku#katsuki bakugo mha#ochako uraraka#uraraka#ochaco#bnha#mha#Izuku analysis#midoirya izuku#bakugou x izuku#izuku mydoria
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It kind of bothers us to see people treat those who insist OSDID is a trauma disorder as "terfs" or to see those who insist it is not as naysayers because, and we mean this as honestly and as kindly as possible, no one fucking cares about this sort of discourse in real life.
I don't mean that medically or professionally people don't care, but rather that a diagnosis exists so that someone can receive the help and resources they need, and the only reason they would need those is if they were struggling. Many self-proclaimed endogenic systems insist they do not have trauma, therefore have no need for a diagnosis or resources given to those with severe trauma.
As a community, we know science, especially mental science, has ethics it is required to follow, which is why to test exactly how, why, and what is needed to form a dissociative disorder is unethical. That being said, there are plenty of RAMCOA/programmed systems who will sit and tell you and while there aren't papers posted on it, it is widely known, especially in Christian nationalist and human trafficking organizations, how to induce OSDID and various (mostly cluster B) personality disorders.
Hell, even someone who has never done the research but wants to start a cult can just make a system (in our experience)
Now, if we are to look at OSDID as a complex disorder stemming from PTSD (post traumatic Stress disorder), then the idea that being "mixed origin" due to experiencing stress makes no sense. Stress is inherently traumatic, though in varying amounts for different people. Autistics tend to have lower stress thresholds.
Also, many people devalue their trauma. They act like because it wasn't dramatic or fancy enough, that because it wasn't a cult or witnessing a body, it isn't "enough." This couldn't be further from the truth.
A list of things that could cause any number of traumagenic disorders:
Spanking
Employing the false parenting method of leaving a child to cry in their crib so that they will "learn." (they are incapable of such, as they are a child)
Forcing a child to spend long, unwilling periods of time by themselves
Forcing a child to sit in silence puncuated by meditative or "worship" procedures as a punishment (the Mormon church does this often)
Having an inconsistent and often negative view on a child's consistent actions (being kind one day and miserable the next etc etc)
Repeated bullying
Emotional and/or physical abuse from a person in power of the child (parents, teachers, lawmakers, other students)
Gaslighting
Enforcing body dysmorphia
A child growing up in a home where the parents hate each other and do not try to hide it or do anything about it
Religious abuse/harassment (things along the line of "if you don't follow our very vague and impossible idea of perfection, you will burn or suffer forever")
Medical neglect
Emotional neglect
Physical neglect
Sexual harrassment
Sexual assault
Rape/CSA/CSEM
Torture
Witnessing death
Cannibalism
Being forced to engage in and/or cover up a murder
Literally anything cults do
There is no precedent for how severe the trauma has to be as long as it is trauma and repeated. You will notice how a good portion of these are usually started in infancy, before memories may even form. This is often why many systems don't remember or cannot access those memories. No matter what type of amnesia, if the brain was never able to remember its trauma from the metaphorical get-go, it is unlikely it would gain the ability to do so.
If you experience plurality or dissociation, speaking to an informed trauma specialist, or even a close friend who may deal with the same thing and is educated about what is going on may help. Personally, I don't care if someone identifies as endogenic or multigenic or whatever label people come up with to excuse their trauma. One of the symptoms of this disorder is denial. I don't even encourage trying to find out the specifics of one's trauma without a strong support system. I do think self-diagnosis is a valuable tool, but like any form of diagnosis, it is designed to figure out what the problem is, so that it can be easier to manage. I also think it's unfair to call those who believe the current research on the disorder "TERFs" or "sysmeds," as being trans has no link to childhood trauma or any significant research to back up what "causes" it.
For context, the gender dysphoria argument was created sometime in the early stages of trans medicine so that doctors could determine which patients would do anything for SRS/HRT, so that they could make their prices unreasonable.
#mental health#mental health blog#did#dissociative identity disorder#osdd#otherwise specified dissociative disorder#pdid#partial did#ptsd#evergreen system
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Autistic High Empathy Masking Theory
Ok OK ok So I just saw a tiktok a few hours ago about the tendency of high-empathy autistic individuals having problems with others trauma-dumping on them, inappropriately given the social context, as in strangers or new acquaintances, or coworkers who are not on the level of being friends with. I have experienced this myself and tbh it has fucked up my gage for what's normal human interaction and how to build friendships.
I think I have an idea for why it happens, though.
Ok So short version: High empathy folks mask in a way that gears them towards social acceptance, due to a number of things, but the mask is imperfect and signals a deeper level of social connection due to the empathy.
Main points this theory relies on: 1. The idea that high empathy folks tend to have a specific, consistent, different masking style than low empathy folks. 2. The commonly accepted theory that masking is used for social acceptance and safety. 3. The commonly accepted theory that the mirror neuron system contains abnormalities in autistic individuals(its been seen in certain studies, but I always have doubts on their sampling) AND the idea that that said abnormalities differ between autistic people and empathy levels (not spoken about to my knowledge, hence my doubt abt previous studies).
So the video previously referenced talked about the discussion in the community about low empathy autistics and their resulting difficulties in making and keeping relationships, especially friendships.
My theory, if correct, would simply explain this as the mirror neuron system not influencing the body language and behavior of the person, and possibly not even their cognition. This would result in less socially-endearing behavior as part of the social mask, subconsciously expressing a social cue of "I have no obligation to be safe for you" (social cues are a whole thing and I've studied them a lot to try to figure them out but I think I'm pretty close; the basics of it boil down to situational pack bonds, camaraderie, and signals for safety on moving to a more intimate level of relationships, such as friends, good friends, and people you can be vulnerable with. The social cues I'll be talking about are safety and pack-bond signaling ones, because they're most relevant in the discussion for acquaintances)
The result of this social cue is that the person spoken to is less willing to be vulnerable and create less of a foundation for a friendship or otherwise to be built on. (Neurotypicals, like autistics, need a foundation of safety, but unlike autistics, they don't necessarily build it by qualities, they build it by consistency and safety previously shown in the relationship)
Disclaimer: There are obviously many factors that could go into this, namely the early trauma surrounding human interaction creating an avoidant attachment style and activating danger signals in low-empathy folks to subconsciously prioritize their emotions over others. This could lead to further disuse of the mirror neuron complex, I really haven't studied this enough and I'm not sure I will be able to.
Anywho:
If this is true, then the opposite could be said for high-empathy autistics, in that our empathy is due to an overactive mirror neuron network, and that that same network influences our masking style because of the perceived rejection we received when our behavior caused others to feel rejected, early in the masking process. That rejection shapes our social cues to give out accepting ones no matter what is aimed at us, so the relationship level(acceptable amount of vulnerability) in the other person's mind deepens rather quickly, because every subconscious feeler they put out to see where the social line is is met with an inviting "You're good! Come on in! You're safe here." social cue, which is quite often latched onto by other traumatized individuals, but also a good portion of the general population. (hence, the trauma dumping)
People crave connection, and our nervous systems are telling them they can find it here.
I might post separately how this can create a specific type of attachment style and dissociative aspect to the autistic trauma in individuals, but for now I'll leave it at the fact that this reward circuit, which would also be developed in early childhood, tells our brains that this version of ourselves is accepted and other versions aren't. So therefore, we need to spend far more time working on this to gain social acceptance, because in the past, evolutionarily, social acceptance was the literal biggest factor that made or broke whether we survived.
That could easily play into the gifted kid syndrome as well as many of the other common high-masking autistic experiences.
As you can tell, I'm totally normal and cool about this. But uh if you wanna ask me questions I'd be happy to answer them :)
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Hey everyone, I mainly came here to post screenshots of train sim world. I love trains out in the wild, in sim games, and in model form. Unless otherwise noted, all train pics i post are screenshots from Train Sim World (currently tsw3 but one day will be able to get tsw4) taken on my PS4. I will credit any custom liveries (paint/design for those outside of railfanning) that get displayed; I do not take any credit for any custom content, all props will be given to the talented creators. If you happen to be the one who I mention in livery credits and would like your Tumblr mentioned/credited, feel free to contact me.
Other main interests are My Little Pony, Star Trek, and consumption/regurigtation of advertisement slogans and jingles. I am trans (she/her), Vulcan/autistic, and Jewish (though don't be put off, while I'm very spiritual myself, any and all religions/beliefs are valid and awesome. Have witch sibling so I'm down with all of it).
Edit: In light of recent events in Israel, I feel I should say that while I am Jewish and proud of my faith, I am by no means an Israeli apologist. I love the idea of the land of Israel (mainly from a spirtual perspective. My religious feelings shouldn't dictate who owns land. The land can still be part of my spiritual experience regardless of what flag is flying) being Jewish, but the current state/government of Israel annexes/occupies regions and that is not cool. Like honestly I would be totally okay if the land itself was owned by Palestine and maybe Palestine would be okay with me being buried there as well as being allowed to visit holy sites (while being respectful to the importance it has to the Mulslim world as well). What I want is for all peoples that want to live and/or worship in The Holy Land to be able to do so peacefully. So please don't see that I'm Jewish and think that I am in anyway pleased by seeing Israel launch attacks, especially with the amount of non combatants that get hurt and killed. G-d never wanted us to have a king of Israel, and They definitely don't want blood shed (Source: Isa. 2. [4] ....nation shall not lift up sword against nation, neither shall they learn war any more.). Sorry Netanyahu, but I feel missile strikes and tank columns count as swords.
At the end of the day, Judaism is supposed to be about Life, not ending it.
Live long and prosper,
Sparkles
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Hi there. I am an autistic adult who has incontinence + other issues that seem to respond very well to diaper usage.
My incontinence stems from severe anxiety issues & though it has been mild to moderate most of my life in terms of the amount of fecal leakage I suffered some bodily changes due to anal fissure that did some damage to my rectum causing it to prolapse if I push without having urge to go #2 thus blocking fecal exit if no urge. This leakage though mild for many years was very persistent. Due to the length of time the anal fissure took to heal, my anal sphincter was also altered in that the muscle became overgrown & stiff with very little elasticity causing the opening to become very small & easily blocked by prolapse. All that & add on top of that the association of toilet association with pain would cause me to lose the urge before I could get sat on toilet.
Any more I have to take stool softeners to be able to go at all & even then I have to take whatever opertunity I am given to go #2 when I have the urge & due to the association I mentioned earlier with pain & toileting which I still suffer even though fissure is healed, the pain is still there due to hypersensitivity of the scar tissue. I found that using the diaper is the best option to go #2.
When I mentioned earlier of anxiety related fecal leakage, it seems to happen whenever I am given a task that is even somewhat difficult for me. These leakages occured even if I was very severely constipated & since I found it difficult to use toilet due to loss of urge & prolapse, I sometimes went three weeks without the ability to deficate.
Other reason I use diapers is it seems to have had a very significant impact on a spasms disorder called myoclonus which is a close relative to epilepsy but does not cause loss of awareness. These spasms were extremely annoying to me as I couldn't take ten steps without a full body spasm. I had over 100 spasms a day for several months. I was about to lose my job as a result of these spasms.
One night I had a dream I wet the bed but woke up dry. This inspired me to do an experiment where I put on one of my girlfriends pull up diapers, wet it & went back to bed in wet diaper. When I got up next morning the spasms were all but gone, only 3 spasms all day. I tried this again next night & had zero spasms next day. After this I was hooked. I started wearing diaper most every day.
Sadly, later, I had a stroke. I came through pretty well & I was prescribed some Miralax stool softeners as a potential stroke reduction measure. This further increased my fecal incontinence but in a way it was a godsend as long as I had a diaper on it meant I could go when the urge hit & often I didn't even have to push. This eliminated both the pain & the prolapse & made it possible to go #2 when I got the urge. This allowed me to fully empty my bowels, which I couldn't do before.
Both of these things diaper were a godsend for me. Now I wear & use them all the all time for both #1 & #2. I feel very comfortable using diapers. I feel more at ease & less jumpy. Before my startle response was extreme, such that I hurt my neck more than a few times from rapidly turning my head from being startled. This settled a lot after using diapers as my main means of elimination.
Being more at ease has also helped my relationship with my girlfriend. Note, she also wears pull-up diapers & fully accepts my need to also wear & use on a daily basis. She has seen the difference it has made, especially with the myoclonic spasms. This acceptance goes a long ways toward helping me with my own acceptance of my need for diaper use.
This is not a sexual blog. Nor is it a place for all the diapered but photos. Please don't try to post them here. By the way I am 66 years old.
I changed my mind this is a purely sfw tumblr from now on.
Also, I seem to be getting these requests to follow from people who have not made any posts here. One of them appeared to want me to go to a sex hookup site.
I am not interested in these requests. If you dont have any posts or any profile on tumblr or you are just about sex don't follow me. If you do follow me & don't have any posts on Tumblr, I will block you.
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