#pda autism | Explore Tumblr Posts and Blogs

pixieverse-icedtea · 9 months

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i wanna go back and hug my younger self so bad, that little girl went through so much

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autball · 30 days

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A child is having outbursts at school, or at home, or wherever else, on a pretty regular basis. And at some point, someone suggests that they need to learn better coping skills.

They suggest therapy, or maybe there’s even a special program at school. Because yes, better coping skills/self-regulation skills/frustration tolerance really would solve everything, wouldn’t it?

Well those are fine skills to have, to be sure, but more often than not, it’s not what that child (or adult) needs most. What they really need is someone to figure out what’s stressing them out so much and then do something about THAT.

Because it’s not actually weird to be distressed over distressing things. Maybe *you* don’t understand what’s so distressing about school or the grocery store or that new person in the house, but that doesn’t mean *their* distress isn’t legit.

People reeaalllly like to suggest better coping skills for autistic, ADHD, and otherwise ND folks. (Since we already have a diagnosis, it’s that much easier to locate the problem in US.) And what they’re really saying with this an awful lot of the time is, “Can you please stop being so distressed by distressing things because it’s making a lot of work for us and we’re not about to change anything for you.”

So before you put someone in some sort of therapy that will teach them that they’re wrong to be upset about the things that upset them and how to get better at pretending to be okay, maybe consider that you might be expecting them to “cope” with more than they can reasonably be expected to.

#autism #autistic #actually autistic #autistic problems #autistic experiences #adhd #audhd #pda autism #pathological demand avoidance #neurodivergence #coping skills

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cancerstanople · 7 months

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What to do if you have a demand you desperately need to fulfill and you can't:

Make up a shitty little character in your head to give you the exact opposite demand, so you can avoid THAT demand while getting done what you need to get done. "Do not brush your teeth." Fuck you Janet, I'm gonna do what I want.

Make up a story that would reframe the task at hand as an act of rebellion or spite. "I live in a world where showering is illegal and if I get caught I'm going to jail for a thousand years."

Use that task to procrastinate on other tasks. "I've got homework I really need to do...hey I haven't done my laundry in a while."

#pathological demand avoidance #autism #pda autism #neurodivergent #adhd #actually autistic #neurodiversity #executive dysfunction

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ditzydoodiary · 4 months

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i feel really bad for saying this, but something i struggle with regarding my autism is trying to sound interested in other people's interests. i try so hard to seem interested because i know that feeling of being ignored when infodumping about your interests, but also, my own interests are so restricted that i cant get into/seem interested in anyone elses interests.

i cant get into things people recommend me, at all, no matter how hard i actually want to because it just feels like a demand. i also cant get into anything else even if i myself really want to get into it. especially if someone else's interests involve anything with real humans. cant watch anything thats live action, it needs to be animated and usually has to involve animals in some way.

#autism #actually autistic #adhd #level 2 autism #mid support needs #pda #pathological demand avoidance #pda autism #special needs #disabled

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autism-affirmations · 24 days

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#autism #autistic #actually autistic #autism memes #affirmations #autism affirmation #audhd #pda autism #pda #pda profile #pathological demand avoidance #persistent drive for autonomy

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my-autism-adhd-blog · 3 months

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10 Signs of 'Pathological Demand Avoidance (AKA Persistent Drive for Autonomy)

Neurodivergent_lou

#autism #actually autistic #pathological demand avoidance #pda autism #persistent drive for autonomy #struggle with authority #neurodivergence #neurodiversity #actually neurodivergent #feel free to share/reblog #Neurodivergent_lou (Facebook)

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e114-6i11 · 8 months

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Too relatable.

#actually mentally ill #crazy #crazy? i was crazy once #mental health #mental illness #mentally unhinged #ptsd #cptsd vent #autistic experiences #adhd #adhd brain #adhd problems #anxeity #pda autism

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therianboyswag · 6 months

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pda and therian gang where r we at

#therian #otherkin #cat therian #pda autism

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maevesweirdart · 2 months

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god: “hey dude check this out” creates pathological demand avoidance

angel: “but won’t this like… ruin people’s ability to function in society, while also sounding like a bullshit excuse whenever a person tries to explain it?”

god: “exactly! that’s the point lol” >:3

angel: “…yknow, honestly, i think i might quit”

#neurodivergent #actually autistic #actually neurodivergent #pathological demand avoidance #pda autism #pda profile autism #pda profile #pda

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chronicsymptomsyndrome · 5 months

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PDA autistic culture is hating the demand that comes with labels so much that you don’t even like identifying as agender because it still feels like…a gender (a concept which society forcefully imposed on you, and you therefore want no part of)

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starful-emporium · 3 months

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the more I think about it, Kristen Applebees shows a lot of pda autistic traits.

she avoids the demands of being a cleric. she avoids the demands of being a student. she even avoids the demands of her friendship with the other bad kids.

#would you be interested in healing us is also cleverly worded to not trigger her pda #pda autism #pathological demand avoidance #kristen applebees #dimension 20 #fantasy high #fhjy spoilers #fhjy

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autball · 3 months

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Contrary to popular belief, “hating praise” is not just a PDA thing. There are many reasons it could not sit right with someone.

It’s also assumed that people like this just hate all praise, but that’s not true either. What we hate is feeling manipulated, or lied to, or monitored, etc.

I mean, do you realize how much adults are encouraged to use praise to manipulate kids and people in care?? We’re supposed to use it to get more of the behaviors we like, and to promote a “growth mindset,” and to encourage them to stick with activities we think are good for them, and so on and so on.

That’s so much trying to get people to do what we want them to do! Is it really any wonder that praise could end up feeling disingenuous and manipulative after a while? How often are we just genuinely appreciating something they’ve done or who they are as a person, and how are they to know the difference?

If you have someone in your life who reacts badly when you praise them, maybe take a look at your motivations or the way you’re doing it instead of assuming they are the one with the problem. Maybe there’s something like low self esteem or rejection sensitivity skewing their perception, or maybe their perception is just fine and they’re picking up on your ulterior motives (and they don’t appreciate it!).

And please know that you don’t have to withdraw all praise. Everyone wants to feel like they’re good at *something* and that people like what they do. Just wait until it’s wanted, and make sure it’s genuine, with no expectations attached.

#autism #autistic #actually autistic #adhd #audhd #pathological demand avoidance #pda autism #oppositional defiant disorder #autistic experiences #autistic feels #autistic problems

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rainbowpopeworld · 5 months

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Actual exchange between my therapist and me-

Therapist: “And what do we do if we can’t do something the first time we try?”

Me: “put it away and never do it again?”

Both: ~laughter~

#gifted kid #gifted #neurodivergent #nd things #perfectionism #trying to be a recovering perfectionist #praise #pda autism #adhd #it’s both normal and possible to want to win at therapy #oh no it’s queue #personal post

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ditzydoodiary · 4 months

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trying so hard to not have meltdown right now

my mum KNOWS direct instructions stress me out. she knows about my PDA. so why does she get so surprised when i cant do something that she asks me to. so angry and upset. want to cry and stamp feet but cant

growing up undiagnosed PDA autism traumatised me. it traumatised me so badly. being treated as if im bad kid cuz i can't follow expectations, demands, instructions etc. not a bad kid. im really not. why cant i just do this like every other kid. taking a shower shouldn't be so hard

#autism #actually autistic #pathological demand avoidance #pda #pda autism #disabled #adhd #level 2 autism #mid support needs #special needs

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autism-affirmations · 8 months

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