#but im so so tired of people coming in and just refusing testing because they want to see grandma or whatever
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you know what boils my blood.
over the last 2 weeks, i've seen countless patients walk into my urgent care center, symptomatic for so many things, refusing to get tested for covid and flu, citing that they don't want to knowingly bring it to their holiday tables. i had a patient tell me, verbatim, "i don't want to test for covid, because i don't want to be the asshole who brings it on a plane."
i understand that - i understand that holidays are times where people look forward to meeting loved ones that they might only see once a year, or where they get a break from the hectic back and forth of their lives.
but here's the thing - whether they get tested or not, they will bring whatever they have to their holiday tables. it's pure recklessness to know that you're sick, and walk into someone else's house spreading the disease.
today, january 2, i saw 91 patients, many of them who have tested positive for covid and flu. many of these patients are the same ones who didn't want testing 3 days ago, until their events were over, and now, they will have to reach out to everyone they know to let them know that they were positive because they were showing symptoms well before their event.
the next week or two? we're going to see many, many more, all people with symptoms that started around christmas. these are the only two viruses we test for rapidly in our office, but they are potent and can be fatal in many people.
so here's why i wrote this post, and maybe it's a little late, but - if you care about your loved ones, please get tested if you know you're sick. it doesn't have to be at a clinic if you don't want it to, because the over-the-counter tests work just fine too (if you test within 5-7 days of symptom onset). just...please don't try to run from the knowledge that you might have covid, because immunocompromised people, elderly people, people with co-morbidities like asthma, pregnancy, diabetes, etc...many of them may not recover. and they may not be sitting at your holiday table in the future because of it.
#zee rambles#this isn't to guilt trip anyone#but im so so tired of people coming in and just refusing testing because they want to see grandma or whatever#and on top of that people are avoiding vaccinations and all that too??#we all lived through the pandemic - everyone saw how many people unfortunately passed away from it#now because of vaccinations and some amount of herd immunity we're finding milder cases in healthy people#but that doesn't mean its gone#that doesn't mean it doesn't have long-term repercussions even in healthy people and that doesn't mean people aren't still dying from it#honestly i just needed a lil rant#and if this helps at least one person??? im all for it#also i can't sleep so here we are spilling thoughts into the voidddd
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as someone whose been infected with covid multiple times im fucking running out of patience with being surrounded by people who refuse to mask, test themselves, or even stay home when showing symptoms treat me like my cautiousness is annoying to THEM.
sick of hearing “oh well if anyone was feeling sick i’m sure they won’t come” ITS FUCKING AIRBORNE
sick of being patronized for not wanting covid a fifth time.
even by people close to me, who care about me, who know the way covid has ravaged my body and brain. as if it’s not fact that people with No Symptoms At All are capable of spread. that’s pre symptomatic and asymptomatic. (If you think you haven’t been infected and you haven’t been testing yourself it’s entirely likely you’ve had an asymptomatic infection) That you’re most contagious 2-3 days before and after your symptoms begin. That it can take up to 14 days for symptoms to appear, and in that period you can pass on covid.
absolutely sick of peoples selfishness and unwillingness to even CONSIDER doing the bare minimum to even slow the spread? to even test before large gatherings? to give a shit at all?
while the rest of us are suffering through long covid or extreme isolation because leaving their home may kill them? anyways i don’t expect anyone to really read this i’m just feeling so tired and scared and left behind… i’m going to go broke because a decent set of masks is only found online for upwards of 50-60$ in my area.
fuck.
#covid 19#long covid#mask up#please wear a mask#please test yourself#pandemic#covid is airborne#covid isnt over
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example #7375 of the tories wrecking the nhs
so. i have covid; ive had two positive tests and the covid monitoring centre is sending me a pulsometer so i can send daily results. theyve called me every day since i reported it.
i also have my first physiotherapy appointment with rheumatology in three days... that i cant really afford to miss.
because if i ask for a rearrangement, its registered on the system as me "refusing to attend the appointment" making it much harder for me to actually get appointments. and having various chronic illnesses (including one that can be fatal if unmonitored and untreated), i very much need regular appointments.
its taken me like four years to get this appointment and the closest rearrangement is six months away.
plus, ive already had to rearrange one this year because i was bedridden with covid last week. and even though the condition the appointment for should be monitored every three months at least to avoid blindness or death, and that one is now two months away.
which means i already have one mark against me, claiming me to be non-compliant. i cant exactly afford another rearrangement since it comes with another negative mark in the system.
so my best option, personally, is to attend the appointment even though i have covid and it is registered on the system that i have covid and covid is an infectious disease.
youd think that factor might make it so that i cannot attend automatically. that would make sense, right?
yeah no. when we called up, the nurse said "as long as you feel up to attending, youll be fine."
its insane, just fucking ludicrous.
the system under tories has literally put me into a fucking trolley problem where my options are:
attend the appointment but risk infecting who knows how many people
OR
miss the appointment and subsequently be marked as a patient who doesnt bother attending appointments and hence, be offered less appointments if any, hence risking blindness or death if im unable to get regular appointments for my neurological disorder that needs regular monitoring to avoid blindness or death
the tories' version of the nhs is literally punishing me for getting ill.
its unacceptable to miss an appointment for any reason, and uh, you know whos more likely to miss an appointment? the disabled and the poor.
the system is blatantly designed to trip up those the tories find undesirable and burdensome; they dont even bother hiding it because a lot of people either agree with them and their bigotry, or they just cant be bothered to care for the disabled and/or the poor.
im sure i could come to some coherent conclusion here, but im honestly just too fucking tired to do that.
fuck tories.
#kai rambles#uk politics#ukpol#britpol#british politics#nhs#uk nhs#tories#covid#covid 19#tw covid#ableism#tw ableism#classism#i just#i dont want to go because i do not want to risk infecting even one fucking person let alone everyone on the train and in the waiting room#but also#im already now going 5-6 months without a checkup for a condition where 3 month is considered a bit long#like at first it was meant to be monthly#because there is a genuine risk of blindness or death or like an aneurysm or a stroke#and i already have prior brain damage#if i miss it and they add another negative mark on me in the system#i am risking blindness and potential death#i already had issues getting appointments because of transphobia and that was terrifying#and you know? during lockdown my brother attempted suicide 22 times and during all that time i couldnt see him in person#because i was locked down in a different city and as much as i wanted to go and be there for him i wasnt risking harming someone else#by breaking lockdown rules. so i never broke them because i dont want to risk harming anyone else#and now im put in this situation where the best option on a personal level is to completely go back on that#and the hospital is encouraging me to do it#its so ridiculous and awful and i hate it
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URGH I HATE NPD TESTS. I FEEL LIKE IM BOTH EACH TIME. I'm both overly confident but have awful self esteem lurking in the background and they're both fighting to come out. it depends on who I'm around with and what happens. basically I feel that with strangers I'd be super confident, then have some moments of opening up about my self doubts, then be confident again but in a more healthy way and basically sorta hyping each other up. but it without being linear like- I still have moments where I feel like shit and open up to people close to me about my lack of self esteem.
(it's long TT/gen srs) :
like see?? overall I wanna be the center of attention, in a way of "I've been isolated for a huge chunk of my life and am scared to be alone" and "I need the attention to get validation in order to counter my lack of self esteem"
BUT me being isolated for so long ALSO drives me to be awkward, shy, and sometimes straight up scared to interact with people because I'm scared to mess things up or just don't know how to do so[interact] (especially if you take into account me being autistic and already struggling as heck with social cues). but I'm ALSO scared to get the attention from the fear that that attention would be bad attention where people would ridicule me/not take me seriously (FUCJ YOU CQ./SRS NEG) and just lead my self estime to drop even lower
YOU SEE MY FKING PROBLEM???/SRS NEG ANGRY sad.
I feel like I'm both extremities, and if not at the same time then shifting from one another too often./srs neg tired (ntm at self tbh, I don't hate how I am. I'm just frustrated by the problems I encounter. it's tiring./srs neg info)
as someone who has been manipulated before, I don't like it. but that doesn't mean that I don't find it easy or I can never see myself being able to do so easily.
I just hate people lying and I can get the job done by being straightforward anyway, I'm not losing time with this bs./srs neg tense info
yeah, as someone who is fcking ridiculed by an ENTIRE MULTIVERSE and THEIR(my) CREATOR I don't really think I get the respect that I deserve. hmph./s angry srs gen (tired and sad too)
like all I'm asking is people to not make fun of me being bipolar. and autistic. and mentally ill. for FUCK'S sake.
yeah I probably warded off half(/exaggeration) the system including fresh with my shouting. sorry pal/gen srs)
...d-
do I.
do I even.
ahaha- do I even have to fucking answer this???!! are you shitting me???/s srs neg angry
you know the answer./neg
im fREAKING AUTISTIC. WHAT THE HELL DO YOU WANT FROM ME??
I'm calling this infodumping but whatever./s ntm neutr tired
(I like showing my puppets and plushies ok?) (they're pretty and took time to make and are sort of like my friends, I'm proud of making them)
...this is a freaking trick question./srs neg stressed because bOTH ARE TRUE.
...does this count if you didn't have the choice? or refused help when you needed until people forcefully got you out of trouble?/gen srs gq
....I'd say it does./srs, ???/
...ok yeah...I...think I made....that clear.../srs, neg(?), shameful, tired/
aha...yes, I do.../lh, gen, pos, less sad/
#me#my post#vent#rant#npd#npd safe#narcissistic personality disorder#error sans#plural#endo safe#fictive#idk/srs tired#oh shit its six am#fucj me#/srs neg still tired#long post
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This is a bit ventish so sorry already
I'm coming to the disability tags for help. I have knee pain so bad it makes me unable to walk at time (hot and cold gel usually doesn't work), similarly to my dad I also have really bad headaches that I kinda just got used to because my mom refused to give me advils or similar things during most of my life. I also have trouble breathing but its confirmed to not be asthma (did the test twice+ lung x ray).
I have a paediatrician , she is pretty bad at her job (not looking more into my leg problems after a blood test, telling me to take melatonin because I said I was way more tired then usually (I sleep just as much) and to stop taking Tylenol to fix my headaches (did not work)). Everyone around me says she is trying her best and agree with her that its "all in my head". I got a social worker by her and said social worker refused to give me a therapist because I am also waiting for autism screening (still don't understand why I can't do both) so they won't even let me confirm that.
I am also going to other doctors for my transition, they said they might give me a therapist if my social worker still refuses so I guess I at least have that? My social worker has been sick for the past 4 months however. I can't contact her for help and because I'm trans , no social worker at school wants to help me because I'm "impossible to help" because "only hormones can make me feel better"
Everyone around me makes me feel like I'm faking being unwell , intentionally or not. I feel like I can't trust my own body scream for help and I don't know what to do. She makes me so depressed I don't actually want to go see her again , thinking about going to her office makes me stressed. Should I just wait until I'm older and hope people take me more seriously , should I just give up in general and suffer ?? Since I have no note from the doctor that say sport is extremely distressing to me because of transness or cannot physically do sport because of my issues I am seen as lazy and am actively forced to do them even tho it hurts me a lot (physically and mentally) to a point where giving my all makes me unable to walk properly for a few days.
Im sorry for coming here for help but I have nobody else to ask.
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petty exes au bets jeanist is downright enthusiastic when dabi tells him that his test of loyalty is to fake his death (and subsequently giving up his presence as a hero and his ability to put people at ease with his presence cause he will nonlonger be there to put them at ease) because hes had to deal with months of listening to hawks rant about his ex and hell finally have some peace cause there's no wya villains have to time or focus on silly little things like their ex, right???
he gets to the league base afterwards, dabi dissapears somewhere and jeanist is acquainting hismelf with the rest of the league
then dabi comes downstairs a package in hand and mittering something to himself
and jeanist, who's talking to toga, and she explains: yeah he's like obsessed with bothering his ex, theyve been having this weird prank war that i think is just him refusing to move on cause hes secretly still into his ex and i keep getting pulled into it and im so tired of it
and jeanist has the abrupt realization that there truly is No Escape from this bullshit
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i think i've finally succeeded in putting into words something that has been driving me insane recently, and i beg of anyone with insights to jump in on this.
ive recently started going back to therapy, and every fucking time i do this i become convinced that there is no one who can help me. Now, i am a huge advocate for therapy. Go to fucking therapy, if you have the means - bit i'm amending that statement somewhat to include: find the right Kind of therapy for you, because there's more options than just talk therapy.
which informs the bit that's driving me insane, which is:
i feel like my therapist is more interested in eliciting the textbook neurotypical response from me than actually listening to or treating me.
i do not have an official autism diagnosis because where i live they run you around $4k, and they largely refuse to even bother testing women above a certain age, however almost anyone who has ever spoken to me and knows anything more about autism than Sheldon Cooper Disease can guarantee you i have it, and from personal documentation over the course of now five years im pretty confident in saying I Am Autistic.
one of the ways this presents is that i am hyper aware of everything at all times. not in a high alert trauma response way (though also possible) but just in a My Attention Contains Multitudes way where i can comfortably juggle awareness of the clock ticking, the humidifier running at a different pitch today (probably need to change the filter), traffic outside, a conversation in the next room (if i get bored of this one sounds like the woman on the phone is having an entertaining day; i'll eavesdrop), wind, some animal in the garden, the AC is a bit high i'm cold, obviously the AC is set with you in mind because you're wearing long sleeves, and it is your office after all, have you read all those books on the shelf or is it just meant to make you look official, oh have to turn my phone to silent, my leg's getting tired i'm uncrossing my knees, oh someone else just came in and they didn't shut the front door so i can hear more traffic plus beach sounds now, oh school must have let out for lunch i can hear games, the humidifier smells weird too what's goin' On with that thing today?
and literally all of that happens every second of my life in every room i'm ever in, and at no point do i lose focus on the conversation. i just work that fast.
now my therapist does not understand autism. that is very apparent. because every single time i stop masking he suddenly drags me through grounding exercises i don't need - i can lucidly explain that i am already familiar with all the steps, can intelligently describe what is Actually happening in my mind, am showing no signs of distress or dissociation - and will not let me speak again until i hold eye contact, sit still and straight, and talk in an expressive tone.
and i have explained to him in detail what it will look like when i am in distress. he just ignores it.
and i feel like in his kind of therapy, the resolution of issues comes from explaining to people What they are feeling and what caused it. knowing this then solves the issue for them. MY issue is that my body stores negative emotions as physical sensations (and that i Do blame on trauma) even long after the emotion itself is gone, i am neutral and have processed it, and can recognise i am not in danger or distress. I just can't coax my body out of Threat Response, and usually have to wait days at a time for the lingering grossness of a slightly awkward phone call to work it's way out of my chest. That's what i'm coming for. i can describe what happened, how it affected me, how it Didn't affect me, what i think, what i feel, what i will do next time, and my whole emotional healing process - BUT i can't turn off my body's natural threat settings until Way after than they should have disengaged.
and despite being extremely clear and eloquent (i thought), and describing that sensation multiple times in different ways, it took THREE sessions before my psych blurted something like it out, and i latched into it and said 'YES!! THAT!! That is what i've been saying!' and he finally said 'oh! oh i'll change what i've set up, then'
and i have to do that every time. i feel like he doesn't respect my ability to understand my own body (which is something i've been receiving more and more from male practitioners in my town) and will only help me with the things i ask for if he can make it sound like he came to the breakthrough explanation for me. and even after that, he's altogether more interested in just getting me to act like how i imagine neurotypical people do at the end of a profound session than actually giving me any tools that could assist me.
i am beginning to think i am better off going to a trauma informed somatic therapist, but i wouldn't know where to find one nor how to tell if they are good.
please can anyone tell me what this is, what i might benefit from doing, and indeed if anyone else in the world has to deal with this and how u do
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lmao so im completely shameless and a sucker for physical intimacy so ive been thinkin abt darling just having childe or kaeya sit on the floor while theyre in a chair and them just. slinging their legs over his shoulders as they do other work ?? they meant it as a friendly gesture to make him happy but also he might b drooling when they gently press their thighs against his head -💉
Slight NS_FT
No, because this ask has completely rotted my brain… Kaeya and Childe are such prevs they’d turn the most innocent of actions into fantasy material… little gross men </3
Warnings: Yandere, GN! reader, God! reader, talks of religion, obsessive behavior/mindset, mentions of murder/death (by thighs/legs), perv! Childe, perv! Kaeya, masochistic tendencies? (especially on Childe’s part), implied sub!character x dom!reader dynamics,
The rest of the ask is under the read more!
— Kaeya
You’d only called for Kaeya’s assistance since Lisa wasn’t around to help you like she normally would; you were in the library just looking for some books to pass time – being under constant surveillance by some of the most protective people in Teyvat often led to your activities being restricted for your “safety”.
He’d been more than happy to drop what he was doing (which honestly was him preparing to go bother Diluc for the afternoon) to come to your aid. He’d teased you a bit, joking about how much you needed him - probably to try and distract from the obvious blush in his face the longer he spent time with you - but eventually helped you find some books about Teyvat’s mythology and history, both subjects that has greatly interested you since long before arriving.
He insists you read yourself, saying something amongst the lines of “I’m too tired, but if you want - I’m more than happy to listen to you reading it for me” though you’re inclined to believe he simply wanted the chance to silently stare at you, a guess that came from the fact that current that was exactly what he was doing.
You found it weird that he didn’t seem to sit down, opting to stand tall and proud beside you, you’d insisted he take the seat beside you but he refused - that is, until you gesture to one of the pillows on the ground, one that found itself laying just between your legs and the plush chair your rested upon.
“Why don’t you sit there if you���ve got such a problem with chairs?” It was partially a joke, you didn’t think he’d rather sit on the ground than an actual chair, and a last ditch attempt to have him sit down somewhere (because heaven knows how much it stressed you out to see him just standing there on the side, didn’t his feet hurt? Wasn’t his back tired? He’d been there unmoving for at least half an hour), you didn’t think he’d silently take the seat beneath your own and sweetly smile up at you.
“Probably the best seat in the house,” he muses, looking around between your legs as his eye twinkled with admiration while he stared at your shocked expression, “come on, you invited me over - don’t tell me you didn’t mean it?”
“Haha, very funny, Sir Kaeya.” You roll your eyes, hiding your face into the book - hoping the cover would be enough to hide the embarrassed look in your face - it’s not your fault he makes you flustered.
He simply laughs, finding your newfound embarrassment amusing, and lets his head hit the edge of the cushioned seat almost touching your skin, as if afraid of defiling you with his touch - “I’m not bothering you, am I?” He asks, his eyes closed, realizing he might be taking too much space for your legs to properly rest.
“Hmm, not really,” you think, your legs were a bit cramped up from earlier, you look down upon the man sitting beneath you, “but it’s fixable.”
You test the waters and let your legs rest upon his shoulders before simply letting them drape over his upper body - he doesn’t react much, simply stiffening at the contact before slowly relaxing - “You don’t mind, do you?” You tease, ready to move your legs in case he asks you to.
“N-not at all.” He coughs into his hand and it’s your turn to be amused at his sudden shyness; did you hear it right? Had Kaeya, the Kaeya Alberich, just stuttered? You go to remove your legs, shocked at the realization, but his hands shoot up to grasp at your thighs; “Don’t! I… I mean, you don’t have to, I’m fine… unless you want to, then it’s… fine too.”
You smile slightly, but opt not to tease him too much - not when you feel him hesitantly lay his cheeks against your skin, caressing your legs with such tenderness you struggle to believe this is the same man who’d slaughtered hundreds of his people, your eyes visibly saddened at the idea.
What a troubled soul, you muse while letting your body limp against him, you remember all you’d heard about his past and lore and your heart aches and so you make a promise to yourself to try and spend more time with him.
If only you knew, that while you worried and pondered over his past - the Cavalry Captain was all but drooling over the way your legs squeezed his cheeks. You would be surprised at how hard it was to contain the moan itching to rise from his throat when he felt your legs first find his body, if he could - he’d turn around and kiss your feet, let his hands wander your sacred skin while he proclaimed how grateful he was for you and your love, but he didn’t want to ruin such a peaceful moment. All you had to do was squeeze your legs and decide to restrict his airflow with your thighs and he’d be a goner, dead - no longer alive, but he didn’t mind at all - he’d rather die at your hands (legs) than die any other way, he wants to laugh at the thought.
His heart was beating a thousand miles an hour, he could hardly contain the excitement crawling all over his body the longer his skin touched yours. It felt electrifying, a buzz stronger than even Dawn’s Winery’s finest alcohol couldn’t compare to. If anyone looked at him, they’d think he was edging himself just by the lewd look that took over his handsome features.
For now, he’d keep these thoughts to himself - simply hoping you’d been so kind as to help him later with his little problem, courtesy of your unknown effects on the Khaenri’ahn.
….
— Childe
Your time in Liyue was coming to an end, you’d soon be embarking on the Crux to visit the Raiden Shogun and her region, Inazuma, which meant the last few days had been hectic as Zhongli and other residents of Liyue attempted to make the most of your time there before you left.
You’d managed to sneak off and find yourself some time, your head was pounding and your legs ache after hours of nonstop walking, you had originally meant for it to be just yourself - a well deserved break after the last torturous days - but it doesn’t take long for the Snezhnayan diplomat, Ajax, to find you - much to your… in reality, you were too sleepy and tired to try and feel annoyed or irritated.
“Ended up running away, huh?” He laughs, making his way towards you - your figure was almost completely hidden by an oversized blanket in the cushioned chair you laid upon, “You should be more careful, you almost had Lady Ningguang send out a search party for you.”
“Mmhm?” You groan, you vaguely acknowledge his words - your body was exhausted and your mind felt like soft putty; you just wanted to sleep and not wake up for the following week or two.
“They really ran you out…” He muses, a pitiful look takes over his face as he assesses your fatigued state, “Care to make some room?”
He originally meant for you to scoot over so he could cuddle you, it was basically a death wish - if Xiao or Scaramouche found him snuggled up to your sleeping he would probably end up dead and floating in the shore of Liyue Harbor by dawn, but it seems like your position is too comfortable or you’re just too sleepy to properly consider better options and instead, you part your legs and nudge him over to sit on the floor between them.
“‘ere.” You lazily motion, before flopping your head against the plush chair once more.
He can’t even tease you, his face is red at the implications - did you have no idea how… how perverted you were making him feel? He knew you probably had no secondary or lewd intentions but you couldn’t just do that and expect him to be okay! Still - he isn’t complaining, he’d dreamed of being in between your legs (in all ways imaginable) for embarrassingly long (to the point he’s sure if Zhongli knew he’d be banned from Liyue), and he only stumbles slightly on his feet as he makes his way to lean between your legs.
“Better than any pillow Mora could buy,” he groans, letting his cheeks meet your thighs, he looks up at your face - you looked so cute, sleepy and yawning, “so nice and kind, letting me rest like this… you’ll make them jealous, you know?”
His fingers trail your skin, taking note of how delicate it felt against his worn out gloves.
You don’t acknowledge his words, your journey into unconsciousness must have been swift, only tightening your grip on his cheeks in your slumber.
“… !” He feels more blood rush to his cheeks, his eyes involuntarily roll back at the feeling of your skin on his as your legs apply a pleasurable amount of pressure against his face - fuck, he wished Zhongli would walk in, so he could rub it in his face.
His hands go to rest on your legs, almost as if begging you to stay there or squeeze him tighter - kill him, he truly wouldn’t mind going like this, but it seems he was too careless and you’re startled awake by his sudden and rough touch.
“A-Ajax? …! Are you okay I didn’t -!”
“Of course not,” he breathes, trying to hide how much he enjoyed the location and situation he found himself in, “you should rest, I’ll keep watch so they don’t bother you.”
“But don’t you want a pillow or to move somewhere more comfortable?” You ask, afraid you’d hurt him and slightly embarrassed at the predicament.
“No, it’s okay,” he laughs, never once parting his cheeks from your thighs “if you don’t mind.”
“Not at all,” you reassure, thinking for a second before smiling down at him, “t-thank you for keeping an eye out.”
“Now, don’t worry and rest,” he smiles, patting your legs and you take it as a sign to head back to sleep - you’d need to make the most of any shut eye you could get in the next couple of hours, “to help you like this… is my pleasure.”
And it really is.
#self aware genshin#yandere genshin impact#yandere genshin au#genshin impact x reader#genshin sagau#sagau#yandere childe#yandere tartaglia#yandere kaeya#yandere ajax#yandere harem#god!darling#yandere genshin#yandere#yandere x reader#kaeya x reader#childe x reader#๋࣭ ancient scrolls#๋࣭. shino’s offerings#๋࣭. hidden devotee: syringe
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Mie, I’m begging for some Jean college au bf hcs - im literally so down bad for this man and the way you write men is just 🤌🏻🤌🏻🤌🏻
Absolutely, not a problem 😌 I saved this ask as a draft a while ago when you sent it, sorry for just now getting to it. Anyway, I love Jean with my whole heart, best boy, best boyfriend <33
King of forehead kisses, and not even just because of his height in comparison to yours; he just likes it. He likes the feeling of pressing his lips against your skin, and making you feel safe.
Brings you tea or coffee however you like it every day without fail. If he can get it to you in the morning before work/school then he’ll do that, if not he’ll meet you some time in the middle of the day to drop it off. Your own personal courier just for drinks.
He… has a thing for long(er) nails. He loves the feeling of them against his skin, even if you’re not scratching to apply pressure—just you holding his hand them grazing his skin is enough for him.
That being said, he will pay for you to get your nails done. Actually, he’ll pay for… almost anything you want, but the nails benefit him as much as they do you so feel free to ball out.
He never blowdries his hair because he doesn’t... know how to do the back of it. You did it for him once and he hasn’t stopped thinking about it since, but he’s also too embarrassed to ask you to do/style it again.
On the subject of hair, he does do his best to style it and take care of it, but he’s a sucker whenever you play with it. Sometimes he feigns like you’re messing up all his hard work, but he’ll literally crane his head into your touch. He loves it.
The first time he lays on top of you and you run your hands through his hair... top 10 most euphoric moments of his life. He tries to fight off the sleep threatening to take over him, but it’s futile. Give it 15 minutes at most before he’s knocked out like a baby.
Dogs love him. Anytime you’re in a park or just taking a walk and there’s a dog around, it’ll come up to him and he looks adorable leaning down to pet it. He loves dogs, too! So he’s always happy to stop and pet them. He’d be a 10/10 dog dad.
Has your name saved in his phone with two hearts at the end. Do not point it out.
Loves taking pictures together and if you guys are on a date, he’ll ask someone to get a picture for him. He just likes having them to look back on (and to send to his mom, later).
He doesn’t mind painting classes or videos or tutorials, but he hates paint by numbers kits. He claims that they have no sense of color theory and that it takes the originality and fun out of painting. Not to mention the quality of the paints isn’t great to begin with; all of which he takes very seriously.
It’s pretty cute actually, to see him get worked up over the paint kits. He claims that painting and drawing isn’t even something he takes “that seriously,” it’s just a hobby for him (one he’s insanely good at); but in moments like these, you can tell that he’s way more into art and art theory and history than he lets on.
Huge movie guy, from animated movies to martial arts movies, Jean is usually willingly to give anything a watch at least once. When he’s high, he can go on about his favorite directors and art styles and movie details for hours if you don’t stop him. It’s super cute. Just don’t bring up Moana, because he’ll start crying.
Arm around the shoulder kind of boyfriend for sure. It’s a casual way of keeping you near him and letting everyone know that you guys are together. Plus it allows for him to easily pull you into him for a quick forehead kiss when needed.
Listen. If you hug his arm, he’s on cloud nine. He tries to be nonchalant about it but he’s about three seconds away from his eyes rolling back in his head it feels that good to him. Bonus if you lean your head on his bicep a little—then he’s a goner.
He takes his bagels very seriously and believes that both you and him deserve nothing but the best quality bagels. He’ll grumble if a bakery gives you guys a less than favorable one and make a note that taking the long route to get to his favorite place is much more worth it.
Always makes you walk on the side furthest from the cars. If he notices you’re not, he’ll just shuffle behind you until he’s shouldering the street and you’re on the inside.
He grew up on a kind of modern ranch situation; not exactly all the way in the countryside, but not isolate from the city, either. Because of this, he knows how to ride horses, take care of smaller farm animals, tend to plants, and yes he knows how to use a lasso. You wouldn’t know any of that though, because he never ever talks about it. The only way you find out is when he takes you to visit his mom’s house for the first time, and she asks him for a hand around the place.
(He’s got a cowboy hat, too, but refuses to put it on. He got it when he was, like, nine, okay, leave him alone).
When he thinks you look tired, he’ll wrap his arms around your shoulders to hug you. It’s usually followed up with a kiss to your head, and a promise that you guys will go home soon and get food on the way.
He’s a really good cook. He just understands and flavors and pairings really well, so he doesn’t need a recipe to make something that tastes good; he just kind of knows what to add to get the balance he’s looking for.
Naturally, he’ll cook for you. Especially if he finds out that you haven’t eaten all day/in a long time. He doesn’t care if it’s 11pm and it might seem excessive to make steak and potatoes with a side salad at this hour, he’s gonna do it to make sure you eat, and you are going to sit there and watch.
He also bakes pretty well, though he isn’t as experimental with his baking as he is with his cooking. He usually sticks to what he knows, and it’s not cupcakes and brownies and cakes; he’s better at croissants, and cheesecakes, and canelés.
Dating Jean means getting along with his friends. If you guys didn’t know each other before you started dating, be prepared to be ambushed by Connie and Sasha (after Jean stops hiding you away and gives them the green light lmfao). Neither of them waste time with the small talk and formalities; straight into mini golfing and beer pong. They make you feel welcome right away.
Sasha always teases that you’re too good for Jean, and that she might just steal you away for herself some day. Sasha is also Jean’s main confidant, so she really knows just how much he loves you, and yeah, she teases him for being lovesick, but really she’s happy for Jean. And proud of him for facing his feelings like this.
Connie adores you, and you know he trusts you when he starts going to you for advice/help. Could be anything from schoolwork, to what color he should get his new shoes in. He’s also the one who, surprisingly, you have the sentimental talks with about your relationship with Jean. It’s easy to overlook, but Connie loves Jean, and he’s come to love you too; he just wants you both to be happy, so he’s there to listen when you need it.
Jean waits outside of your classroom after you’ve had a test or presentation, usually with a drink or a snack, or the promise of taking you out as a treat. Always tells you he’s proud of you, and is there to comfort you if you think you didn’t do too well.
He does not shut up about whatever major you’re in. It could be the same as his; it could be the complete opposite as his. He thinks it’s so sick that you’re doing it, you make it look cooler, you make it look better, and he’s certain you’re the smartest person in your program.
He’s pretty serious about his studies, too, so he’s always down to study with you in the library whenever you’re both free. More often than not, he shows up after you, usually with food or extra chargers. He greets you with a kiss on the forehead, and asks you how you are while massaging your shoulders gently. If it’s been a while since you took a break, that’s the first item on the list, after that, he gets to work and stays with you until you’re ready to go, even if he doesn’t have as much work to do.
He always sits across from you. This goes for when you’re in the library, or out to eat at a restaurant; Jean loves sitting across from you. He gets to see your face the best that way, and he adores looking into your eyes when you talk.
He’s not... not a morning person. He’s not up at 6am ready to grind, but he wakes up before noon; let’s say 10am is his happy medium. That being said, if you wake up before him, regardless of the time, there’s a 9/10 chance he’ll lay on your back and tell you to hush so you guys can sleep for 10 more minutes.
If you’re (close) friends with Eren, Mikasa, and Armin, Jean is... happy you’ve got people to rely on, but, “Of all people on the planet, you put your trust in Jaeger?” He acts so bitter (because he is), but deep down inside, he’s glad you have Eren to rely on if you need to.
(Also, you have to humble him and remind him that he and Eren aren’t all that different. If you like him, why wouldn’t you get along with Eren, bye).
Turns out though, that it’s not Eren who threatens to beat him up if he breaks your heart. It’s not even Mikasa, although, her threat goes without saying; it’s Armin he’s terrified of.
The last time Armin hated someone, it was this guy in your program, who happened to share a few mutual classes with him, too. Jean never knew the full story, just that he’s pretty sure that kid dropped out the following semester.
If you have a job on campus, Jean usually doesn’t show up while you’re working (knowing how embarrassed he would be if you did that to him), unless you work the night shift and it’s dead. Connie, however, does show up; usually in some kind of crisis (“Please help me, I don’t know what the fuck APA formatting is and this is due tonight, please, please, please!!”). Your coworkers actually thought Connie was your boyfriend for a minute. That’s when Jean starts showing up more lmfao.
He makes it a point to go on a scheduled, night out, kind of date at least twice a month. He knows life gets busy with school and work and midterms, but he always makes sure you both set side a time to take a well-deserved break and be with each other.
He’s the romantic type, so these dates are pretty swoon worthy, too. Drive-in movies, nice dinners, classy art exhibits, Jean plans it all. On that note, he really likes planning dates; he just doesn’t like talking about them with his friends beforehand.
All in all, very romantic, very precious boyfriend. He’s always thinking about you, what you need, and how he can help you out. You’re one of his main priorities, and he just wants to treat you right.
#anonymous#when.... when.... WHEN IS IT MY TURN#aot x reader#jean x reader#jean kirschtein x reader#jean kirstein x reader#aot imagines#no because he's the love of my whole life#jean fluff#jean smut#eren x reader
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SAFE AND SOUND
a/n: this one took a little longer to write, but im so happy its finally finished! its not what i originally planned, i started a whole different plot but hated it so started again, but i might go back to the first story, so maybe more bodyguard!harry content is gonna come! anyway, hope you’ll enjoy this one!
pairing: Bodyguard!Harry X Reader
warning: use of weapon (no one dies), mentioning of cancer (no one is sick), sexual content
word count: 9.1k
masterlist
“This is not up for discussion, Y/N. What you are doing and what you are about to achieve soon might upset a lot of people that hold great power. We can’t just assume you’ll be fine, walking around like anyone else in the world.”
Your boss, Julian explains it to you, leaning onto his desk, trying his best to keep his cool about your protest to get you a guard to watch out for you and keep you safe. It’s been an ongoing struggle and fight you two have been having these past weeks and it became a burning situation since you’ve made some major progress in your project.
“I’m not some kind of royalty to have security with me all the time,” you grumble rolling your eyes.
“Not just royalties have guards, Y/N. Just accept it, that you’re valuable, your work is very important not just to our company but to the whole world. Do you not realize how big it is? You are close to having the cure to cancer, Y/N! You can easily get a Nobel-prize for that!”
“I know that it’s important, but no one knows me, no one will see me on the street and know who I am or what I do!”
“It’s not about the people on the street. The world is a dark place, darker than you could imagine. Please, just… I want to know that you’re safe.”
Staring back at him with your arms folded on your chest you contemplate his words. You can see the rationality in his words, it’s just that you don’t want to break your routine, you don’t want people around you all the time, you don’t want to end your privacy like that. But Julian is right, your work is important and there have already been a few attempts to steal your researches, but they miserably failed. However that doesn’t mean they will be stopped the next time as well.
“One guard,” you speak up. “Just one. I’m not gonna have a whole fucking team,” you tell him raising your eyebrows. He lets out a relieved sigh, a tiny smile tugging on his lips.
“I was hoping you’d say that.” Reaching out to the phone he presses the buzzer that signals to his assistant, Monica outside and a few moments later she walks in, accompanied with a tall, suited man, his green eyes immediately falling to you upon entering the room.
“Y/N, I took the courage to pick him out for you myself. This is Harry Styles, the best you can find in the city if not in the country,” Julian introduces him as he pushes himself away from his giant mahogany desk, walking closer to the man as they shake hands firmly. You stand up from the armchair you’ve been sinking into these past ten minutes and unsurely hold out your hand to the man.
“Harry Styles, pleasure to meet you,” he introduces himself, a thick British accent lacing through his voice and the way his green irises stare back at you, you can feel your heart fluttering in your chest. Mr. Styles is undeniably the most charming and handsome man you’ve ever met, with his perfectly carved cheekbones and chiseled jawline, pink lips and those enchanting green eyes framed by his thick lashes. There’s something in his appearance, something feminine, but still, he holds so much masculinity at the same time, it’s hard not to be enamored by him.
“Y/N Y/L/N,” you mumble your name, shaking his hand slightly before letting go of it.
“Details about your cooperation have already been discussed with the security agency and us, but of course, your word is what counts, so we’ll walk over the whole plan with you as well,” Julian explains to you and you nod shortly.
The three of you move to the conference room and the next hour goes by with working those so called details out, some of them are ridiculous, some of them you can get used to, at the end you are left with a somewhat bearable plan, but one thing is for sure. Harry Styles will be a big part of your life from now on.
THREE MONTHS LATER
The tiny pack of sugar tears open in your hands, but you put too much effort into it so the countertop is now covered with the content of the pack instead of ending up in your paper cup.
“Fuck,” you growl, dumping the empty pack into the trash before grabbing another one, hoping it won’t end up the same way.
“Let me help you,” a smooth, male voice speaks up next to you and Harry grabs the pack from your hands as he places his own coffee to the counter. You let him tear the pack open easily, pouring the sugar into your drink without problem before he puts the lid back to your cup.
“Thank you,” you mumble, closing your tired eyes for a split second. You’ve been overworking way too much these past weeks, it’s starting to shut your system down, but you don’t want to rest, not when you’re so close to finishing your project.
The past two weeks have been major, you finally made the progress you’ve been working towards for months now, letting you step into the last phase of your work finally. But it’s been a quite stressful time as you’ve been eager to finish as soon as possible, but that meant little to no time spent outside of your lab.
Harry shoots you a reassuring smile before you both grab your drinks and head out of the café in the direction of your workplace.
The past three months were one hell of a ride when it comes to Harry. You didn’t hide your dislike towards his continuous presence in your life, standing by your side wherever you went. It frustrated you, made you feel like you didn’t have your freedom any longer even though he never did anything to make you hate him. He was considerate, respectful and only wanted to do his job, yet you still gave him a hard time at the beginning, right until the need for his work was proved.
Two months ago someone broke into your apartment while you were out, they searched through the whole place, looking for something. Well, not just something, they were clearly interested in anything connected to your research, but luckily, you’re not dumb enough to just let these stuff lay around your home.
Even though you didn’t encounter the person responsible for it, the incident still shook your up. Knowing that someone could get into your personal space so easily, that they could have come at a time when you were home and vulnerable, it scared you. Harry was the person that eased the worry and fear in you, he took care of everything in an instant and upon his best advice, you moved to a new apartment with a higher security level. He even moved to the place next to yours so he could be as close to you as possible at all times. There was a much needed shift in your relationship after that and you didn’t see him as an intruder any longer in your life, but more as a hero.
“So would you like Italian or Mexican tonight for dinner?” Harry asks as the two of you enter the building, using your IDs you go through the massive security gates, the guards in post nodding in your way.
“Isn’t it your night to choose?” you smile at him sideways as you wait for the elevator.
“Okay, then Thai,” he smirks, making you laugh. “Hope you are not planning on eating it here again,” he gives you a warning look and you purse your lips.
“I have a lot to do, and—“
“Y/N, you need to rest sometimes,” he scolds you as if you were just a child.
“I do rest. Sometimes,” you answer with an innocent look as the elevator’s door slides open and you walk in with Harry following you right behind.
“Like once a week? Do you even sleep when you’re at home?”
“I do! Don’t make me look like I’m some kind of crazy workaholic!”
“I’m just worried about you, is all,” he sighs, giving you a hard look.
“Oh, Mr. Styles. If I didn’t know you better I would think you might have a soft spot for me,” you smirk at him teasingly before the elevator arrives to your floor and you walk out without a word. Harry just stares after you with a small smile tugging on his lips as he thinks about your words. It’s funny, especially because you both know something more than just a professional relationship has been going on between the two of you, only dancing around it as the situation is a little too complicated to address now.
It’s not like any rules are tying you down, but you would rather not mix up work with your private life. You might have feelings for Harry, but you refuse to act up on them until he is out of his duty as your personal guard.
Your days are usually the same. While you lock yourself up in your lab, working with no end, Harry stay either with you in there or he hovers around the door, keeping an eye on everyone and everything. Just the thought of his presence never fails to bring you a sense of comfort, knowing that you don’t have to worry about your safety until he is near. It might seem nerdy, but you can easily get lost in your work. It doesn’t feel like a job, growing up with parents who were excellent doctors and pharmacists themselves, you were doomed to be a science enthusiast yourself from the beginning. Learning has never been a task for you but a gift, as you liked to look at it.
Working overtime happens often because you lose touch with time easily once you get down to work. Nothing exists outside of your lab and you hardly realize how late it is until Harry usually warns you.
“I didn’t joke when I said I didn’t want to have dinner in here,” he steps into your sanctuary while you’re in the middle of running tests for the millionth time today. Pushing your glasses up to the top of your head while the machines are buzzing and whirling, you look up at him with a tired smile.
“Let me just… finish this one last test and then I promise we’ll head out.”
“Alright, but I’m watching you. No more tests,” he warns, sitting on one of the stools while you finish what you started.
Harry never really asked you about your work, for a while you weren’t even sure if he knows what you’re doing and why it’s so important. It was never discussed at the beginning and he never brought it up later either. But judging from the time he spends near you at the lab he must have picked up a few things about it surely.
The machines stop working and the tiny beeping sound signals that the results are out. You grab the long printed paper and start scanning the data, chewing on your bottom lip as you hope to find what you’ve been looking for all day. The numbers are coming in great, but it’s been like this for a while, it’s the end that never matches up with your expectations. So when you get there and see the graphs showing the result that you’ve been dreaming of since the start of the whole project years ago, your mouth falls open in disbelief even though it’s what you’ve been working for all this time.
“Oh my God,” you whisper.
“What?” Harry’s head snaps up in alert, jumping off the stool.
“I… I did it,” you breathe out, glancing up from the paper. “It’s my first time succeeding, Harry!” you start laughing, the shock taking over your whole body that you really did it this time.
“And what does that mean?”
“Come on, let me show you,” you tell him in excitement, pulling him over to the computer where you pull up all the data you’ve been working on. A virtual version of a cell comes up on the screen as you start typing, modelling what you want to show him. “This is a completely healthy cell, it’s what you are made of too, mostly,” you ass with a chuckle before another cell comes up on the screen. “And this is what cells that are affected by cancer look like.”
The difference is a lot more complicated than what you can explain to him in such a short time, but he can see it with his own eyes. The color, the shape, everything is different from the first one. Harry examines the screen and nods shortly, letting you know that he is following.
“I’ve been working on a substance that is able to not just detect the cancerous cells but it can also kill it effectively without hurting the healthy ones.”
You bring up the virtualized version of the substance you’ve been working on, a short animation showing how it can tell the two cells apart and only attack the cancerous one.
“I haven’t been able to get the numbers above 60% when it comes to succeeding in the process of selection so my whole project was about finding a solution to that. I’ve been trying to find the right substance to mix with our already existing one to solve the problem, but I haven’t been successful in it.”
“I assume until now,” Harry hum and you nod smirking.
“Yeah. The last test results came back very good, quite promising. It’s still not the end of the process, but it’s a huge step.”
“That’s great,” he smiles at you and though you know he probably understands just a fracture of the whole process, he can still figure out how important it is. “Congrats, Y/N.”
“Thanks,” you breathe out, pride filling your chest as you shut the computer off. “I guess this is my cue to end the day,” you smile at him before packing up everything, getting ready to finally leave.
It’s not the first time Harry is spending the evening at your place. You often have dinner together, or watch a movie whenever you get home early enough to do that. Through the time you’ve spent together because of his job you’ve grown to be friends above everything. Good ones, in fact, which is a big deal for you since making friends has never been an easy task for you.
You bought takeout on the way home and as Harry set the table you poured yourself a glass of wine, knowing well Harry would never drink when he is on duty and he is basically working all the time he is with you, so you’re drinking alone. You both sit to the dining table, starting dinner together in a comfortable silence. It’s another thing you appreciate about Harry. He doesn’t try to talk when it’s not necessary, you hate small talk, you’d rather sit in silence than talk about something nonsense and Harry is a partner in that.
“When do you need to leave work tomorrow to get to the party on time?” he asks breaking the silence and you freeze. His eyes fall on you, examining your features for a moment before he smirks. “You forgot about it?”
“I just… thought it’s going to be next week,” you truthfully admit.
“We talked about it last week,” he smirks at you playfully. “And I told you it would be next week which is… this week.”
“I know how the days work, Harry,” you give him a look of ‘give me a break’ before you turn back to your food. “I just…”
“You just forgot it,” Harry finishes for you, and you just roll your eyes at him.
Glancing at him over the table you wonder if he’ll wear something different than is usual attire he always wears. Black suit with a white shirt underneath, the top two buttons left undone, giving you a tiny peek at the tattoos on his chest. You know those are not the only ones, you’ve seen him with the suit jacket off before, the sleeves of his shirt rolled up, his whole left arm is covered in ink and you wish you’ve had the chance to take a better look at them.
Harry is such an intriguing person in a lot of different ways. He definitely likes to keep things to himself, not one to ask for attention and it’s not just because of his work, it’s his personality. However he is good with people, interacting with them, being social. A skill you haven’t really mastered yourself yet and you probably never will. He always seems to know what to say, you’ve never seen him even the slightest bit anxious or nervous before, the confidence he holds is unmatched and it makes it hard to not think about him in ways you shouldn’t be.
After dinner he helps you clean up, just like he always does before heading out, but before he could leave he stops and turns back to face you.
“Oh, a friend of mine is visiting from the UK on Sunday. I already mentioned it to you before, but I was hoping I could get the afternoon off,” he wonders and you nod right away.
“Of course! I’ll be just fine at home,” you smile at him.
“Thank you,” he smiles back before walking out of your place at last.
Because of the party in the evening you are forced to stop working early the next day. It’s weird to leave the office in broad daylight, but you know today can’t be one of those days when you end up seeing the new day in the lab.
Harry was right yesterday, you completely forgot the whole party thing, meaning you didn’t plan anything ahead and you had nothing to wear, so through the day you called your sister, Mara to help you out. She was more than happy to lend you anything you needed. She meets you at the office, beaming to spend some time with you finally. It’s not that you don’t like her company, but you are quite different, is all. Your sister didn’t get sucked into the world of science, though she definitely has the bright mind to take up on any field she would want to explore. But she was more into the world of art, having written her first fantasy novel at the ripe age of twenty, she is now a bestseller author at only twenty-nine with a bubbly personality and basically every trait you never owned yourself.
“Harry! So nice to see you again!” Mara beams at the man as the three of you meet up at the lobby.
“Hi, Mara,” Harry smiles with a tiny nod.
“Alright, I have everything you could need so let’s head to yours!” your sister cheers before you make your way out to your cars.
Arriving to your home Harry splits from the two of you, letting you to get ready in peace and also to get ready himself. Mara didn’t joke when she said she has everything you need, the trunk of her car is basically filled with clothes and shoes, there’s no chance you won’t find something to wear tonight.
She orders you to take a quick shower as she unpacks everything she brought and when you emit from a cloud of steam with a towel wrapped around your body and one on your head, Mara gets down to work.
“So do you have a date for today?” she curiously asks while she does your makeup.
“Huh, yeah, sure,” you huff ironically. “It’s just gonna be Harry and me.”
“So Harry is your date?” her ears perk up, but you’re quick to protest.
“Of course not! He comes with me everywhere,” you mumble with your eyes closed as she is doing something on your eyelids.
“But it could be a date,” she offers and you huff in disagreement.
“You know that’s not how it works, Mara.”
“You are making it more complicated than it is! No one would blame you if you just… went for it! Harry is obviously an attractive guy.”
“Then maybe you should date him,” you bite back bitterly. Growing up you weren’t the boys’ favorite, they always paid all the attention to your sister. It’s not that you blame her or them, she always had a more capturing and lively personality that attracted people naturally. But it made you wonder if there was something wrong with you, spending all your time with your nose buried in a book or doing researches for fun while Mara was out with her friends, living her best life. Even her published books were inspired by her personal life experiences.
“Y/N,” she sighs, her hands leaving your face so you open your eyes to look at her disapproving expression. “You obviously like him so I would never do that and besides that, he for sure likes you too.”
“What’s not true,” you deny right away, but then you look at her curiously. “But why would you think that?”
Mara smirks at you tilting her head to the side, seeing right through your act that you’re not interested in Harry. Of course you are, but you choose to keep it at bay for the sake of his job.
“Y/N, I see how that man watches every move you make. It’s written all over his handsome face.”
“Of course he watches my every move, that’s his job!”
“No, it’s different. You’ll see it sooner or later,” she smiles before ordering you to close your eyes again so she can finish your makeup.
Mara does wonders to your looks, the makeup look she does on you already makes a huge difference since you don’t bother to do anything on your every days. But she didn’t stop there, she made your hair look like you just stepped off of the pages of a magazine and the dress the two of you chose was the cherry on the top. The emerald green dress was tight around your curves, showing just enough of your body to be still considered modest, but also have some spice. And though there are a lot of advantages of the dress, your first and most important thought (to you at least) was how well it goes with the color of Harry’s eyes.
“I’m a genius,” Mara sighs satisfied with her work as you slip on the pair of nude heels and put your necessities into the little clutch you’re taking with you. Just when you’re gone with everything, the doorbell rings and your heart jumps in your chest, knowing that Harry is standing on the other side of the door.
“I’ll get it for you,” Mara smiles rushing to the door as you walk into the hallway, standing a few feet behind her so as she opens the front door and Harry comes into view, over Mara’s shoulder his eyes easily find your figure standing there, feeling a little awkward and self-conscious, like you are about to go to prom with your crush. Difference is that you are not a teenager anymore and you aren’t going anywhere together together. Tonight is just work for him.
But as his bright green eyes fall on your frame and you see his lips slightly part, you can’t help but allow yourself to think for a moment that it’s more than just work. That he feels the same way about it as you do. Though you don’t voice your hopes and just smile at him faintly, hoping you don’t look completely ridiculous in your outfit.
“Harry, come on in!” Mara invites him into the apartment and he walks in, wearing his usual black suit with the difference of having a tie on around his neck, his white shirt is appearing neat and crispy and his sometimes unruly curls are now gently combed back a little so his curls are not falling into his forehead.
“Hi,” you smile at him nervously fumbling with your clutch as he takes a few steps closer to you.
“Hi. You look… beautiful,” he smiles back at you a little breathlessly as he takes a respectful look down your body before his green irises meet your gaze again.
“Thank you. You look great too,” you chuckle softly. “Should we… head out?”
“Yeah, sure!” he nods, offering you his arm and you link your arm with his instantly, hoping you won’t trip in your heels. “Lock the door when you leave, Mara, alright?” you call out to your sister who is watching you smiling.
“Sure! Have fun!”
You wave at her one last time before walking out and shutting the door closed behind you.
This party is held every year at Pharma-Z, mostly this is the time when the brain meets the money. Investors and funders like to meet the people behind the million dollars researches from time to time and this is the occasion where both sides show up. Julian always asks you to be social and try to mingle, but the whole thing feels forced and painful for you. You’d rather just be left alone with your researches and projects without having to schmooze to the people who give you the money for your hard work.
It’s held at one of said investors’ luxurious penthouse, that doesn’t even look like someone’s home with the huge outdoors infinity pool, the spacious and modern interiors and the expensive looking decoration that was put up just for the occasion.
“Y/N! I’m so happy you are here!” Julian approaches you with a drink in his hands and you’re happy to see a familiar face in the crowd. You don’t really know others from work, only your little team you directly work with and of course, your boss, Julian.
“It’s not like I had a choice,” you chuckle giving him a short, friendly hug. Julian is far from a nightmare of a boss some people have to face at their job. He is an actually nice and very smart and intellectual person. The pharmaceutical industry can be harsh and dark, the competition between the businesses is way more intent than people think. This is why you need the protection. Some companies profit off of the fact that cancer has no cure yet. They make money from all the treatments that doesn’t even guarantee full recovery. A lot of big fish don’t want the cure, because that would make them lose a good chunk of their income and some of those would even go to the depth of hurting you for being so close to ruining their business with your invention. Pharma-Z is luckily a genuine company that wants to help sick people and that’s why you’re working there.
“You know how important it is for the company,” Julian sighs, but he understands how uncomfortable these events make you feel, though he can do nothing to help you. “Harry, nice to see you again,” he smiles at the man by your side.
“Julian, nice to see you too,” he nods, shaking hands with your boss.
“Mingle a little so people can see and meet you, alright?” Julian requests and you just nod silently before he moves on to the next group of people.
You get yourself a drink to ease your nerves a little as people start approaching you. Some of them you’ve met last year, but there are a lot of new faces. Your project has brought in quite a few new sponsors and investors and now they want to meet you and talk about the research their money is going into.
You try your best to keep a smile plastered across your face as you tell the people the same thing over and over again, receiving praise and compliments on your work before moving onto the next conversation just to start over again.
You can feel your social batteries running out, not sure you can put up with another conversation with a wealthy investor who wants you to know you have a job because they gave money for your project in hopes of you bringing more money to them.
Harry has stayed by your side the whole evening, and you didn’t notice but he kept examining you every few minutes to make sure you were holding up and he noticed how tired you’ve grown from socializing for so long.
“Y/N,” he softly calls out, his palm finding the small of your back. “Why don’t we get some fresh air?” he kindly offers and you immediately understand that he is trying to get you away from the guests and the overwhelming conversations you’ve been dealing with. Nodding you let him usher you outside, finding a spot where the two of you can be a little alone.
“I fucking… hate small talks and being nice to everyone,” you let out a long and heavy sigh, as you lean against the railing, paying just one short glance at the city’s bright lights under your feet. Harry chuckles shortly.
“I figured. You’ve been chewing your lips so hard I was afraid you’d start bleeding.”
Now that he has brought your attention to it, you realize you are doing it again, so you let go of your bottom lip from between your teeth and it brings out another chuckle from Harry.
“I’m just… not good with these… social stuff.”
“I disagree with that,” he hums, furrowing his eyebrows.
“Oh please, if you haven’t realized it, my number of zero friends is a tell, I think.”
“Come on, it’s not zero. You’re friends with Mara.”
“But family doesn’t count, she is kind of forced to be my friend,” you shrug, making him laugh.
“Okay, but I’m your friend too, aren’t I?” You furrow your eyebrows at him.
“You spend time with me because it’s your job.”
His eyes soften on you as he leans against the railing next to you, looking so effortlessly handsome and charming, you almost need to take a deep breath at the sight of him. And the cheeky smile on his pink lips is definitely not helping your case.
“I know you didn’t mean that. You’re a smart woman, Y/N.” Reaching out he tugs a loose strand of hair behind your ear as he inches closer a tiny bit. “I think we stepped over the line of just work.”
“So… you consider me your friend?” you ask shyly.
“If you have to ask maybe I’ve been doing something wrong,” he chuckles softly, making you smile too. Folding your arms a shiver runs down your spine from the cold evening breeze. “Are you cold?” Harry asks, but before you could even say a word, he shrugs his jacket off and drapes it over your shoulders.
“Oh, thank you,” you breathe out shyly.
“Do you want another drink?”
“Yeah, I think I might need another one,” you chuckle and nodding he tells you to just stay there until he gets you a new one.
Turning towards the view, you enjoy the lonely moments for a little, not too keen on going back inside and keep up the façade of interest any longer. You’d rather just head home, maybe have another drink with Harry on your couch while you watch a rerun of whatever show is on TV and then fall asleep after a hot shower. You’ve been working way too much lately and it’s just now crashing down on you. Next week you definitely should cut back on your hours at the lab, the project is already going amazing, it won’t hurt if you actually had some rest before you lose your mind.
You hear footsteps approaching you and you think it’s Harry returning, but as you turn around you are faced with a stranger, a man who is staring down at you with bloodshot eyes and… a gun pointed at you.
Your breath hitches, your blood freezing in your veins at the sight and your legs almost give up underneath you.
“What… who are you?” Your voice comes out as a whisper, tears already flooding your eyes as you melt against the railing as if you had anywhere to go, but you have no chance against him.
One glance at the gun allows you to see that it has a silencer on, with the music coming from inside and no one around, if he shoots you, he’ll be able to get away before anyone realizes what happened.
The man doesn’t answer, just holds up the gun, aiming right at your chest and you close your eyes, thinking that this is it. This is how your life ends, in the middle of a posh party with no one around to help you. Your lips are trembling and hands are shaking as you hold onto the railing, waiting for the inevitable to come, keeping your eyes shut, not wanting to see your killer as the last thing you see before you go.
And then you hear the muffled gunshot, making you scream in fear, your knees turning into jelly, but the pain never comes. Instead, you hear grunting and growling as a body falls to the ground in front of you.
Your eyes snap open and you see Harry straddling the man, the gun lying near your attacker’s hand and he is trying to reach it, but before he could, you kick it away as Harry throws a punch at his face that stops him from trying too hard to free himself.
The next few moments are so busy and blurry at the same time. Your legs give up underneath you, making you fall to the ground, your whole body shaking in waves. In the meantime Harry gets the man into a position where he can be easily controlled and people start flooding out at the scene, helping Harry while security working at the party take the man, the police already on its way.
When Harry can finally step back from the attacker, his eyes fall on your figure and he rushes over to you, kneeling down next to your trembling body, cradling you into his arms upon seeing how shaken up you are.
“Hey, it’s alright. It’s over, you’re alright,” he murmurs, holding you tight as your fists grab onto his shirt, your breathing is uneven, the oxygen barely makes its way into your lungs as you’re panting and gasping from the shock. “Come on, let’s get you inside, Y/N,” he gently tells you, helping you up from the floor even though your body feels like a pile of brick.
You can feel everyone staring at you, whispering behind your back as you try to hide in Harry’s arms while he walks you back inside, away from the man that tried to take your life. He walks you into one of the bathrooms and closing the lid he sits you down to the toilet while he grabs a towel and wetting it he kneels in front of you, tapping the cloth to your cheeks gently. You haven’t even realized that you’ve been sweating from the shock and the coldness feels amazing against your burning skin.
“I’m sorry,” you mumble, but not even you are sure why.
“Nothing to be sorry for, Y/N,” he gently murmurs, giving your hand a squeeze as you shut your eyes closed. He grabs a glass from one of the cabinets and fills it with water handing it over to you.
“Thank you,” you mumble, bringing it to your trembling lips, but before you could drink it, your eyes snap up to meet his gaze. “And thank you for… what you did.” Your voice dies down at the end, the picture of the man pointing the gun at you still living so vividly in your mind.
“No need, it’s my job after all, right?” he chuckles softly, making your lips twitch the slightest bit before you start sipping on the water.
The police show up soon and they arrest the man who refuses to talk. They also request you to give your statement about what happened, but Harry manages to let you just give them the brief story and go in sometime soon to give them your full statement so you don’t have to spend any more time there. They are quite sure the man was hired by someone who doesn’t want you to finish your project, and it’s scary how far some people are willing to go just for the money, just to keep sick people in suffering for their own benefit.
Heading home you stay silent as Harry drives, staring out the window you let the nightlights of the city pass by you while you still see the same face, the face of the man that held a gun at you tonight. The gunshot is still ringing through your ears, it was so close, so real… of course it was real! All of it was real and your life was on the line. If it weren’t for Harry, you wouldn’t be here right now.
Arriving to your home Harry helps you out of the car and you cling onto his hand as you head up to the apartment. He keys the two of you into your home, flicking the lights on and looking around before you go further inside, just to be sure.
“It’s all clear, don’t worry,” he murmurs as you nod and make your way into the bedroom. Kicking your heels off your feet you sit on the edge of the bed, letting out a long breath, feeling your limbs loosening up a bit for the first time in the past hour.
Harry moves around the place doing whatever before he joins you in the room, kneeling in front of you his hands find your bare knees and your eyes meet his worry-filled green irises.
“Do you want to take a shower?” he softly asks and you nod your head. “Come on, I’ll start the water for you.”
He helps you up from the bed and walks you into the bathroom. You stand there awkwardly, not sure what to do as he starts running the water in the walk in shower before he steps back to you.
“Would you…?” you ask, turning around, needing help with the zipper of your dress. Harry clears his throat as his fingers work on it and a moment later the fabric loosens around your frame as you hold it to your chest with your arms. Turning back around you peek up at Harry and you notice the slight blush on his cheeks.
“I’ll be outside at the door, okay?” He whispers, his fingers delicately touching your cheek as you nod before you watch him walk out and close the door behind him.
The hot water feels freshening, like it could burn away the memories even though it’s still so vivid in your mind. You stand under the running water longer than you intended, but it feels nice and needed. Once you’re done, you wrap yourself into a fluffy towel and walk out of the steamy bathroom only to find Harry sitting at the edge of your bed, waiting like a loyal puppy. When he sees you, he stands from his spot and you don’t miss the way his eyes scan over your body that’s barely covered.
“Alright, I’ll go now, but if you—“
“Don’t!” you gasp, panic taking over you at the thought of being left alone. One of your hands grasps his arm to stop him from moving and he freezes in his spot, staring back at your fearful eyes. “Please, stay here,” you plead, voice barely over than just a whisper.
There’s a heartbeat of a pause in him as he is watching you intently and for a moment you think he’ll say no, but then his hand finds yours on his arm and he gives it a gentle squeeze as he nods.
“Okay.”
You let out a long, relieved breath as you ease into comfort. He’s staying, he’ll be with you all night, protecting you from everything and everyone.
“Can I take a shower too?” he asks softly and you nod, stepping to your wardrobe to get him a clean towel. “Thank you. I’ll be back shortly,” he tells you before walking into the bathroom and shutting the door closed behind him.
You hear the water running again and you find yourself standing at the same spot as you listen to the noises coming from the bathroom. Harry is in there, soaking under the water naked and you can’t take your mind off of how badly you want to be there with him.
It’s not just because of what happened tonight, though it made you realize that you don’t have much time to waste. Nothing can assure that you’ll live another day and you don’t want to deny happiness from yourself. You want to be with Harry and as far as you can make it out, he feels the same way.
Upon a sudden decision, you pad your way over to the bathroom door and open it carefully, the warmth immediately hitting your face as you step inside and close it behind you. The glass of the shower is steamed up, you can only make out the blurry frame of Harry in there and you wonder if he heard you come in, but it doesn’t seem like that. His clothes from the night are lying on the floor in a pile, his watch that he always wears is carefully placed next to the sink.
Your hands grab onto the edge of the towel around your body and you unwrap yourself, hanging it up on the wall before stepping to the shower. Hoping you won’t scare him, you open the door, the steam immediately hugging your naked body warmly and you see him standing there with his back facing you as you step into the spacious walk-in shower.
He notices your presence, you see him freeze mid-movement before he peeks over his shoulder, his eyes falling on you as he slowly turns, facing you completely. Standing in front of him completely bare, you feel more vulnerable than ever in your life. You’re scared that he is going to send you away, that he won’t let you get closer to him and if that happens, you’ll feel humiliated, but he just stands there in his naked glory and doesn’t say anything, so you take it as a chance to shoot your shot.
Reaching up your hands slide to his hard chest, up to the base of his neck as you push your front against his, skin to skin with the hot water running down your bodies. His hands find your waist and you could cry from the feeling of his touch on you. Pushing yourself up to your tiptoes your nose nudges against his as your eyes fall closed.
“Y/N,” he breathes out, stopping you right when your lips could meet. Opening your eyes you see the hesitation in his green irises that appear so much darker than they usually do.
“Do you not want it? You don’t want me?” you whisper.
“I do. It’s not that,” he sighs shaking his head slightly. “But you went through a lot today. I don’t want you to make decisions you might regret in the morning.”
You can’t help the small smile that tugs on your lips at how considerate and protective he is over you, thinking that this might be just something that crashed over you in the heat of the moment, but it’s been in the making from the first day you met him. Despite all your protesting against him, you knew you needed him and not just as your guard. He is what’s been missing from your life all along, you just never realized it.
“There’s nothing I could regret when it comes to you, Harry. I needed tonight to open my eyes. Our days are counted, I’m done running from my own happiness.”
He lets out a long, shaky breath as his hands hold tighter onto your waist while your hands run up his neck until your fingers tangle into his wet locks.
“I need you. And not just because of tonight. I’ve always needed you.”
“I’m here, Y/N. I’m all yours,” he breathes out before his lips smash against yours all wet and hard, but it’s the most heavenly feeling you’ve ever experienced.
You become a mess, tangled in each other, lips melting together as your hands explore naked limbs and torsos, bodies pressing tightly against each other shamelessly. Harry walks you backwards until your back hits the cold tile and you let out a whimper as you arch your back at the sudden feeling, just as his head dips down, lips attacking your neck, kissing and nibbling on the soft skin. Your light leg lifts as his hands wander down your thigh, your hips pressing together and you feel how hard he is, his cock pushed against your other thigh, making you moan at the feeling. Reaching down you blindly wrap a hand around the base, giving him a few slow pumps, earning a guttural growl from him before his lips return to yours, kissing you hard and filled with passion. His hands are all over you, on your thighs, ass, back and chest, as if he was mapping your whole body wanting to remember how every inch feels under his touch.
Without tearing his lips away from yours, he blindly reaches behind him, shutting the water off before urging you to jump into his arms, legs wrapping around his waist. He carries you out of the shower, placing you to the counter next to the sink as he stands between your legs, his hands once again finding your breasts as they knead them, making you whimper and shake under his touch. It’s euphoric and addictive, you already know you won’t be able to go a day without feeling him against you like this.
“Bed?” he breathes out against your mouth and you nod eagerly. Reaching to the side he grabs a towel, wrapping it around you, tapping and squeezing you to dry you off, throwing fits of giggles when you grab it and wrap it around his body as well.
The towel falls to the floor abandoned and forgotten as he lifts you off the counter and brings you to the bed, laying you down and holding himself up above you with one arm. His other hand cups your cheek and turning your head you kiss his palm gently, eyes glued to his as he settles between your legs.
“Are you sure about this?” he breathes out, his lips dancing against your cheek and the corner of your mouth.
“Yes! Harry, please!” you beg with a whimper, your whole body aching to feel him inside you.
“I’ve got you, I’ve got you, love,” he kisses you as his hand leaves your heated face, runs down your naked body until his fingers reach your throbbing clit.
He slides two digits through your already wet folds, but just to work you up even more he starts drawing circles on your bud, turning you into a whimpering mess underneath him. Your fingers dig into the lean muscles on his back, feeling them twitch from his movements and one hand sliding down to his ass, grabbing a handful of him while pushing him closer to you, his erection pressing against your core.
“Harry, I need you!” you moan, not able to contain yourself any longer. You need to feel him, you need him as close as possible.
Reaching over to your nightstand you grab a condom from the drawer, ripping the package open with your teeth before you carefully grab his erection and roll the condom down his length, ready to finally feel him inside you.
He flicks his fingers on your clit one last time before his hand wraps around the base of his cock, giving it a few pumps while his soft lips kiss down your jawline and throat, his face hiding in the crook of his neck. Your arms circle around his shoulders, your chest heaving from the sensation as he positions himself just right, the tip teasing your hole. Harry lifts his head up, his bright eyes finding your gaze just as he sinks into you, filling you up perfectly.
“H-Harry! Fuck—“ you gasp at the feeling, your walls stretching around his thick cock as he stays still for a few moments, letting you adjust to his size.
You draw your legs up, giving you more space to go deeper as he starts thrusting, sliding in and out of you oh so perfectly, inching you closer to your relief with each movement. You cup his face in your hands, staring into his eyes as if you could see his soul in them and for a split second, you feel like you actually do. His lips are parted and the cross pendant is grazing your chest while he fucks into you, never falling out of his rhythm.
You want to beg to him not to stop, to keep moving and moving, but no words can leave your mouth as your back arches, your orgasm building up in the pit of your stomach. You start grinding your hips in sync with his, allowing him to reach deeper into you, making your toes curl from pleasure.
“Harry, I’m gonna—I-I’m gonna—Ah!” You can’t make up one coherent sentence as your legs start shaking, feeling your orgasm taking over your body.
“I know, baby. Let it go. Let me make you feel good,” he pants, his lips kissing you everywhere he can reach, your lips smashing against each other in a messy kiss, your tongue meeting his in the middle just when you reach your high.
You moan and cry out his name, fingers digging into his flesh as you chase your release. Seeing you fall apart underneath him is enough to throw him over the edge, spilling himself into the condom as his mouth hangs agape, your name falling off his tongue as if it was the holiest glorification. Combing your fingers through his hair you hold him to your chest as he collapses on top of you, his head lying on your naked chest as you both try to catch your breath in the sudden silence that came over you without the sounds of your passion.
Rolling off of your body he slips out of you, an empty feeling taking over you right away, but he is quick to cradle you into his arms to keep the intimacy. You lay your head to his chest, a thin layer of sweat covering the both of you, but you couldn’t care less. You listen to his steady heartbeat as you draw one of the swallows on his chest with your finger, running it over the lines of the ink. You want to soak in the moment and stay in it for as long as possible, but you can barely keep your eyes open. As Harry’s fingers are gently running up and down your bare back you let your eyes close and the last thing you remember is hearing his soft whisper.
“Don’t worry, baby. I’ll keep you safe.”
You wake up without an alarm in the morning and it’s the first time for that in a long-long time. You stir and groan before you open your eyes, your hands reaching out next to you, looking for the man that was next to you when you fell asleep, but there’s nothing and no one beside you now.
Panic rises in your chest as your eyes pop open and you frantically look around in the room, hoping to see him somewhere near, but you’re alone.
“Harry?” you call you as you sit up, holding the sheets to your chest since you’re still naked. No answer comes and you can feel your heart rate rising instantly.
Getting out of bed you grab the nearest clothing item you find which is an old hoodie, and you put on a pair of clean panties before you carefully walk out of the bedroom, afraid of what you might find outside, but it’s completely silent and still, no one is around. Harry has left.
“Fuck,” you breathe out, feeling the lump in your throat growing as tears are forming in your eyes.
Where did he go? Why did he leave? Is he coming back? Is he gone forever?
You can’t stop yourself from going into depth you shouldn’t, just because you don’t find him first thing in the morning, but you still haven’t entirely recovered from last night’s events and before you could stop yourself, you are thinking about the worst possibilities there could be.
And then you hear the lock turning in the front door.
Blood rushes out of your head as you freeze, afraid it’s another attacker and this time you won’t be as lucky as you were last night. But as the door opens Harry walks in with a paper bag in his arm and you can’t help, but start sobbing at the sight of him.
“Harry!” you cry out, launching at him and he barely have time to put the bag down before he catches you, locking you in his strong arms.
“Hey! No need to worry, it’s just me!” he soothes softly, his hands running up and down your back and head. “I’m sorry I scared you, just wanted to get you something to eat, baby,” he murmurs, kissing the side of your head as you try your best to hold back your sobs.
“I just woke up alone and I thought…”
“I’m sorry, baby. I shouldn’t have left while you were sleeping. But I’m back and I’m alright.”
You just nod, hugging him a little longer before you loosen your hold around him to lean back and look him in the eyes.
“So… you’re staying? With me?”
“If you want me to, yes,” he nods with a soft smile as he cups your tear-soaked face in his hands. “I’ll keep you safe and sound and I’ll be whatever you need me to be.”
“Just be yourself and… be with me,” you shyly ask him and he nods, his smile growing into a wide grin before he leans down and captures your lips in a sweet, intoxicating kiss.
Thank you for reading, please like and reblog if you enjoyed it!
#harry#styles#harry styles#harry styles au#harry styles oneshot#harry styles one shot#harry styles x you#harry styles x reader#harry styles x y/n#harry styles fanfiction#harry styles fluff#harry styles smut#harry styles angst#harry styles imagine#harry styles fanfic#bodyguard!harry
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Uhm hi, I saw that your emergency requests were on and wanted a little confort for a long time. If you find a little time for this, here's my request: I never really had a lovely family, I was bullied and so much more. I have an ED but I am trying to recover and overall I wanna work on myself. I had very long hair and my parents loved it and never allowed me to cut it. Well now I finally did and my mum and I got into a fight and she was so manipulative and she said I always give everyone else the fault. Could you write a story where the reader tells their s/o about the manipulative and toxic household and gets comforted?
(My favorites are Osamu, Iwaizumi and Tendou, but feel free to use whoever you like.)
CONTENT WARNING: Eating Disorders, Toxic/Abusive family, Fear of failure, overperfectionism,
I love that you have come to me for help darling thank you for doing so,
You’re very lucky for comfort because I actually go through this also. I have a rocky relationship with my mother.
It got a little too long, so I only did Osamu. BUT you can always send me a request for Iwa and Tendou.
Also it gets a little in depth, but I wanted things to be concrete for you.
Please don’t be afraid to light up my inbox, or request again, if you’re ever in need of me!!
Osamu Miya
Osamu loves to share his passion for cooking with others, especially his s/o.
When he noticed you refusing his offers at lunch on the daily, he frowns.
Was it something he did?
Better to just observe for now.
He decided to test out his theory one day, giving you his normal morning greeting of a hug and a chaste kiss to the forehead.
“Good morning my love.” he cooed, pulling you close to him.
You smiled brightly at him, “morning, ‘Samu!”
Things seemed to be off to a good start, but there was time for him to observe.
As the day skipped by, he noticed how your demeanor would change.
Like during English, when you got an 80% on your test. He noticed your happy face drop into an immediate sour one.
“Love an 80% is just fine. You have room for improvement, yes, but you’re not a completely lost cause.”
“Y...you don’t get it, ‘Samu.” you mumbled, tucking the test in your school bag, standing to leave as the bell rang.
Things only seemed to get worse as time passed.
Osamu noticed that you were in an absolutely terrible mood during lunch, practically on the verge of tears. It was only worsened when Atsumu was poking fun at you for “forgetting your lunch.”
“Hey.” Samu mumbled, fingers gently grazing your shoulder, “let’s go somewhere, yeah?”
After announcing to his brother and Kita that you two had to see a teacher, he led you by the hand to the empty gym. He sat you down on the sideline benches, letting you sit on his lap as you rested on his chest.
“Okay love, what’s been happening?”
The threatening tears started to burn as they welled in your eyes.
“I just... It’s all falling onto me ‘Samu. I can’t keep disappointing people! No matter what I try to fix, I always just end up falling short and disappointing someone-“
“You’re not disappointing people, I promise you.” He replied softly, wrapping his arms around you protectively.”
“But I am... it’s my fault that things are going this way I- I just need to be better.”
This comment sparked something inside him.
“(Y/N) there’s more to this... isn’t there...?”
The tears come out. They’re fat and patter onto Osamu’s hands, which are laced together around your torso.
“Take your time, my pretty baby. I’m right here.”
“ ‘s my mom. She just... She doesn’t believe in me anymore. It seems like all I am to her is a burden. I don’t even deserve basic things like eating anymore.”
“I see.”
“Im just so tired of feeling like this, ‘Samu.”
“Then don’t.” He replied quickly, “Just try to rest and relax for now. I promise you we have plenty of time.”
Osamu gently raked his fingertips up and down your arms as he rocked you in his arms.
“You are so much more than what your mother accounts you to be.” He says in a barely audible voice, “You’re passionate, sympathetic, humorous, kind-hearted. You’re dazzling, my love.”
“ ‘Samu don’t-“
“ M’not just trying to flatter you. I really mean it (Y/N). I love you for exactly who you are. You’re far from disappointing, In fact you push me to do better with volleyball.” He rests his chin on your shoulder, “Though I now understand why, whenever I see you so passionate and satisfied at succeeding, it makes me think ‘hey maybe I should try that mindset and I’ll have more fun.”
He once again wraps you in his embrace, squeezing tightly
“I love you for you. Your mother can’t do anything to taint my view of you, and I sure as hell will make sure she can’t do it for others’ either.”
#osamu miya#Miya osamu#osamu x reader#haikyuu osamu#osamu Miya x reader#osamu comfort#haikyuu comfort#haikyuu emergency requests#tw ed#tw eating disorder#tw family#anime#emergency requests#the great unknown#inarizaki x reader#osamu Miya comfort#osamu Miya x reader comfort#osamu angst#osamu fluff#osamu crack
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Please wrote more surrogate fics please . could I request one with SakuAtsu or could you just start a series on these. If you'd me comfortable with that. That on IwaOi surrogate fic brought me so much joy. I can't even describe it.
oh my goodness i’d love to!!! it makes me so happy knowing you liked it cause like,,, idk why it’s just special to me :) also im so glad you asked for sakuatsu bc these two ships are basically my favorite jhfgbsj. and yesyes i’d love to have a mini series with like little scenarios of each ship <333
this was insanely long. like insanely.
content warning; artificial insemination, pregnancy, haikyuu manga spoilers, gay people being happy idk
being iwaoi’s surrogate
BEING SAKUATSU’S SURROGATE
↬ it took forever to even get them together, so with a duo as indecisive as them, it’s imaginable how long the decision to raise a child together took. it took a long, long while for that transition from enemies to lovers to be final, and even then, they hadn’t realized how serious their relationship was until they were off getting married and then suddenly wanting a child?
↬ it was something atsumu brought up out of the blue, just casually as they sat side by side on the couch. “wouldn’t it be nice if we raised a child together?” and it stuck with sakusa ever since. he didn’t know why he was obsessively thinking about it as much, but it’s all he could think about. literally. anytime he so much as thought about atsumu with a child, and a child of their own too, his stomach did a thousand and one flips. sakusa was never the biggest fan of children, and he knew that neither was atsumu. but, this would be different, wouldn’t it? Still, he tried to remind himself of the cons; they were pro-athletes, they didn’t have time, they didn’t understand the weight of the responsibility, were they even ready for something like that? somedays it was too tiring to take care of themselves, of each other. were they ready to be responsible for a whole life, someone dependent entirely on them? it seemed too— unrealistic. like something he could only hope to dream about, and just dream about.
↬ until he thought of atsumu with a little kid, a spit image of either one of them, sitting on his lap, giggling and laughing and squealing in glee. and so he decided, there will always be cons, he just has to see if the pros outweighed them. and honestly, they did. they were pro-athletes, sure, but that also meant they were financially stable, and could provide for a child, properly. they were mature now, knew each other very well, and had adapted to living with one another. they had family and friends all around. the kid would for sure grow up loved and cared for, and him and atsumu would add another person to their family. it really seemed like a dream, but this time, an attainable one.
↬ so as he ate dinner with his lover, he blurted out, “let’s raise a child together,” and atsumu honest to god choked on his food. he asked sakusa if he was serious, if he meant it, if this was real, and sakusa’s answer was yes to every single one of his question. yes, he was serious; yes, he meant it; yes, this was real. as real as can be.
↬ they both already knew they wanted a surrogate, and it didn’t matter who was the father. so long as the child was theirs.
↬ finding a surrogate was, well, a pain, to put it into perspective. sakusa was so picky about the “requirements,” if you will, and atsumu was suspicious of every single woman, it was kind of ridiculous really. he just “didn’t trust that they wouldn’t run away with the baby!” in his words. atsumu suggested sakusa’s older sister, which seemed perfect in his head, but sakusa refused, claiming it was 1. extremely weird, and 2. he doubted she’d say yes, with her own life to handle.
↬ and it finally, finally, came to atsumu: he could always just ask, well, you. he had met you during his college years, and since then, he’d been coincidentally crossing paths with you ever since then, and you’d even managed their msby jackals team at some point. it was weirdly ironic how he’s coming back to you, kind of like fate.
↬ so he suggested it to sakusa, and for once, the latter didn’t really have any way to object, except, “what if this inconveniences her?” other than that, you were the perfect candidate. they knew you well, trusted you, knew they could rely on you. and atsumu was sure you wouldn’t run with the baby. with regards to the inconvenience part, well, they could always just deal with that when the time came.
↬ they invited you over for some breakfast two days later, after they’d thought about it properly, endlessly, and figured you were their best option. it was weird seeing them so nervous when you first arrived, like they were breaking up with you or something. atsumu barely ate with how nauseous he felt, and sakusa spent the entire time watching you eat instead, hands fidgeting and legs shaking. it was really weird, but you didn’t bring it up, letting them take their own time to tell you whatever it was they wanted to tell you, because obviously, they clearly had something to say.
↬ after breakfast, you sat in their living room, just watching the tv quietly, until sakusa offered to get you some water. you weren’t really thirsty, but you agreed anyways, unsurprised to see atsumu rise from his own seat a minute later with a, “be right back,” as he headed to the kitchen. you could hear them bickering and whisper-yelling, and if you weren’t starting to grow as nervous as they were, you would’ve had it in you to laugh. they returned looking like they were bearing the most daunting of news, sitting down on the couch perpendicular to you. atsumu’s hands were sweaty and intertwined tightly together, while sakusa tried to remain as composed as possible. it seemed like the dark haired man would speak up, finally, parting his mouth with a deep breath.
↬ but it’s atsumu that blurts out, “please have my baby!— our baby. please have our baby.”
↬ honestly, your first response was to laugh, in disbelief, as you clutch your glass of water. but then you see their faces — god they looked so goddamn scared — and you realized that, they were really serious. they really wanted you to carry their baby for them. holy shit?—
↬ you were mostly speechless after that, stuttering as you ask them to please explain, you’re honored but are they are, have they thought about this? properly? in depth?
↬ to your surprise, they really knew what they were doing. they’d done their research, and thought about a million other options before deciding that you were the best one. they also repeatedly told you that you didn’t have to do this, and that they didn’t want to guilt-trip you into doing it either. they wanted you to say yes only if you yourself wanted to say yes, and if this wouldn’t negatively affect you or halt your life in any way. you were the one that was going to be carrying the baby anyways, weren’t you? at the end of the day, this was all about you.
↬ you asked them for time to think about it, and reminded them that it wasn’t a no. you just wanted to make sure you were making the right decision whichever that ended up being. a few days later, you call them, asking them to meet up one way or another, and atsumu’s even more nervous than he was asking you; not even sakusa’s gentle lips to his temple or large hands soothingly rubbing at his back or his kind words could help him. sakusa himself was insanely anxious. in his head, it seemed like your ‘no,’ would finalize everything. that it would really mean no hope in having a child of their own, their very own.
↬ you invite them over to your home, and the kettle is already boiling when they arrive. you make them tea and make small talk if only to delay the inevitable. but, to each of their surprises, you take a deep breath and say, “i’d be honored to carry your baby for you,” with the brightest, warmest smile. sakusa has to bite his inner cheek to will himself to not cry, because he can’t believe you said yes. you agreed. you’re going to carry their baby. him and atsumu were having a baby.
↬ atsumu doesn’t stop himself from throwing his arms around you, collapsing on top of you in tight hug that you kind of can’t breathe, but you let him, and you laugh when he thanks you for saying yes, that he’ll “be forever in your debt.”
↬ it’s the happiest you’ve seen either of them.
↬ when you’re done with the process of insemination (of course, atsumu does joke that the three of you should go the natural way and have a threesome, to which he earns a smack from his lover and a smack from you, at the same time), the three of you just have to wait, really. it’s the longest period of waiting you’ve ever had to do, but you try to be patient, as patient as you can be. when you wake up one morning and throw up, you look at your period tracking app to see if maybe you were pms’ing. except, you weren’t. you were late. like a good three weeks late.
↬ immediately, you’re booking a doctor’s appointment. you wait to tell sakusa and atsumu after confirming your suspicions, because you don’t want to raise their hopes up for nothing. they’ve already been swimming in a pool of doubts ever since the insemination, calling you everyday to check up on you and ask for any progress. when the doctor confirms your pregnancy — holy shit you were pregnant — the first thing you do is go over to their house. you know it’s not the best idea to show up unannounced, but with how long they’ve been waiting, and how much they’ve been wanting this, the more and more you fed into it, you couldn’t wait any longer to tell them. you arrive, and the moment sakusa opens the door for you, you gasp out, “i’m pregnant.”
↬ sakusa’s quite literally frozen in shock, his mouth pressed in a thin line with eyes wide open, while atsumu walks over and goes, “oh hey,” in greeting before noticing sakusa’s face and just ???? “what’s going on?”
↬ “i’m pregnant.”
↬ “you’re what?”
↬ you show them with tears stinging your eyes the results of the test you’d taken at the doctor’s, and atsumu grips the report so tightly, like it’ll disappear if it slips only slightly from his hands. sakusa’s still in shock, trying to process everything. it takes him a good while before he can function properly again.
↬ the pregnancy itself is a lot smoother than you’d imagined. iwaizumi, as their athletic trainer, although not well versed with pregnancy, knew a lot about health and taking care of yourself in general, so he made sure you were always eating right and healthy. he even accompanied you once when sakusa and atsumu couldn’t, to the doctor, and made sure to ask him specifically what you should and shouldn’t be eating. all of the olympic/national team are more excited than anything. they’re insanely protective over you, and always pamper and care for you you when they can, whether that be back/neck/shoulder massages or giving you their food when they notice you eyeing it or letting you lean entirely on any of them for support as you walk. granted, they do make fun of you, especially the bigger your stomach got, but they mean well, really. suna once made fun of you and, because of the hormones, and because he was genuinely just mean, you started to cry. since then, suna swore off bullying you, at least until you gave birth.
↬ osamu is beyond ecstatic to become an uncle. he’s so excited it makes atsumu incredibly emotional. he goes with his brother on trips to ikea to buy a crib and gifts him an insane amount of baby clothes and always begins a conversation with, “how’s the baby?” every time you’re around, osamu’s hand can be found resting on your stomach, soothingly rubbing, excitedly grinning when he feels a kick. he is just so happy for his brother, he could cry.
↬ you ask them if they want a gender reveal when you find out or to keep it until the delivery of the baby, but they’re both insanely impatient (even though sakusa does try to convince atsumu to wait because it’ll be exciting, he himself isn’t even that convinced of that and they just ask you to tell them). with the help of osamu and his and atsumu’s parents, you organize a gender reveal party. the moment he sees the pink smoke, atsumu cheers so loudly it makes you laugh till your stomach hurt. sakusa’s grinning wider than you’ve ever seen him, grabbing atsumu’s face and kissing him, before pulling you into a tight hug. it’s literally the cutest thing ever, everyone just cheering loudly around you and celebrating with you.
↬ when you go into labor, you’re with neither of them, but with osamu, aran, and kita. they were staying the night at a hotel since they had training away from where they lived, and you were spending the night at osamu’s because the fathers of your baby really didn’t want you to be alone so close to your due date, and who better than osamu? your water didn’t break, but you kept having contractions. you were brushing it off as normal pain at the start, but they started to get worse, and closer together in time. kita, because he’s kita, had been keeping track, and told you how far apart your contractions were. to which you went, “contractions?!”
↬ aran’s calling sakusa and atsumu as kita grabs your bag as osamu grabs his keys and helps you to his car. you really couldn’t have been around a better set of men, because they were perfectly composed the whole time, helping you breathe and stay calm by staying calm themselves, reassuring you that you didn’t need to worry and that you will get to the hospital in time. they did flinch every time you screamed or cried out in pain, but aran held your hand the entire drive there, and kita guided you to steadying yourself as osamu drove as fast as he could.
↬ the issue was with sakusa and atsumu. to say they were freaking out would be an understatement. they were positively losing it. atsumu’s anxiety was louder than sakusa’s, but the latter’s was clear as ever on his pale skin and clammy hands. they were so annoying in the delivery room, literally faring worse off than you, who was pushing a whole baby out of her body. when you finally gave birth to a healthy baby girl, atsumu sobbed and sakusa cried in his hands, so maybe it was alright after all.
↬ they literally couldn’t believe their eyes when the nurse handed you the baby and placed her on your chest. she was so, so tiny, so beautiful, and theirs. honestly, you couldn’t hold back your own tears at the sight of her, and at their reaction to her. you held her in your arms as they thanked you, over and over and over again, for the biggest blessing they could ever receive.
↬ despite the fact that you were simply their surrogate, sakusa and atsumu knew they couldn’t just separate you and your baby, and neither could they just take her home all of a sudden. so for the first few months, you stayed in their guest room, but the baby slept in her own room. it was more difficult than you expected it to be when you were leaving her to go back to your own home, but they promised you repeatedly that they’re not really taking her away. it wasn’t as if you couldn’t visit at any time you wanted to come visit her. but at the end of the day, you knew what you had been signing up for, and that she was their daughter.
↬ she grows up to be a gorgeous woman. she’s interested in volleyball, sure, she’d been raised with volleyball players everywhere around her, but it’s not her immediate passion. atsumu thought he’d be more upset about that than he actually was, because he found out that it didn’t matter at all what she wanted to do. hell, if she wanted to do nothing at all and stay home forever with them, he was 100% on board with that. whatever made her happy and healthy, he was okay with. she grows up to be really close and really comfortable with both of her fathers, and they make sure with every passing day that no matter what, she can always come to them. and she does, about every little thing. and each and every time, they listen and advice and guide her properly. a s parents, they’re a perfect balance of strict and lenient. they set and raise her to never cross those boundaries, but otherwise they give her complete freedom. they respect her privacy, her decisions, everything.
↬ there was a day when she came back home from school, and they had taken a biology class for kids, where a teacher had explained periods to them. obviously, as curious as ever, she’d asked her dads about it, because she didn’t really get it. she wanted to know the how’s and the why’s and the what’s and the when’s. with every passing second atsumu had felt his lifespan shorten. eventually he suggested they call you, who she knew as her ‘aunt’ for the time being, since you were a woman and nobody would really explain it better than you. when she did get her period eventually, and had to sheepishly and shyly ask her dads to go to the store for her because she needed, um, supplies, atsumu lost it. sakusa had to try and calm him down all while laughing as he got ready to go to the store for her, because the drama of miya atsumu never gets old. he just couldn’t believe she was already getting her period. what the hell! what the actual hell!
↬ of course, he proceeded to embarrass her by telling osamu, telling sakusa’s parents, telling his parents. not cool :(
↬ when she was old enough, especially to understand the concept of being a surrogate (oh my god the sex talk was a whole other insufferable thing), they told her about you, and that you were actually her biological mother and not just an ‘auntie.’ she tried to be angry at them for keeping it from her, but she was honestly more excited about finding out than anything. it brought the two of you closer together, and for the next mother’s day, she organized a whole brunch for you, her and her dads, got you a gift, flowers, everything. yeah, you did cry.
↬ you genuinely have never been more satisfied and thankful for a decision like this one, ever, especially because of how much of a blessing the outcome had been.
can u tell this isn’t my first time thinking about this. ever since i posted the iwaoi one i’ve been wanting to do a sakuatsu one, but i didn’t really know whether anyone had enjoyed that or would want more, so thank you for sending in this ask!! love u all mwah <3
#haikyuu x reader#haikyuu headcanons#miya atsumu x reader#sakusa x reader#sakusa kiyoomi x reader#atsumu x sakusa#sakuatsu#sakuatsu x reader#atsumu x reader
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18 and Junhee pls!! Xx
"to be fully seen by somebody, then, be loved anyhow is a human offering that can border on miraculous."
proof read: kinda
warnings: none
note(s): the format might be garbage, im mobile.
Love is a weird thing but so are the conditions that come with it; the limits that people decide need to be in place. You understood boundaries or not wanting to take too many steps before you knew the relationship would hold but some things never sat right with you. It took a few years but it wasn't until you overheard some of your project group talking that it finally hit you; most people you knew didn't want to date their best friends for two reasons.
1. It could ruin their friendship. This reason was obvious and of course you understood.
2. They'd seen way too much.
You remember hearing those words and your head lifting, confused and wondering what that could even mean. When you were in a relationship that would eventually progress, weren't they just going to see those things anyway? You never could let that thought go, not once you decided that would only make it better; it would make a relationship stronger. Well, in your eyes.
Dating was something that seemed to come easier to you before those thoughts started polluting your mind; no one seemed to understand or see you in a way you really wanted. The ideal person for you was someone who saw everything; the bad days, the good days and the maybe okay but not so great days. It was really starting to mess with you. By not wanting to date certain friends, were you restricting yourself from the relationship you really wanted?
Only one person, one friend, knew you better than you knew yourself, you were positive of that. Your best friend of nine years, Junhee, had probably been through almost every bad thing possible in life with you. You began recalling all the situations you'd been in with each other that were memorable; the things you wouldn't have faced with anyone else because you didn't want anyone else to see.
'Do you remember when you got your belly button pierced?'
And that's when it began.
The question came out of nowhere, breaking the silence of your apartment and leaving Junhee to look up from his book confused and blinking. 'Uh.. yes?' His response came out slow, hesitant like he was missing some weird in-between the lines meaning of the question.
Your head tilted, finally looking over at him. 'Do you remember the way you squeezed my hand to the point it was purple because it hurt so bad you nearly passed out?'
His features flushed at the ridiculous memory being forced back into his head. 'You mean the same day you had to cling to me, crying because your first tattoo felt like your leg was being seared off?'
You hated crying in front of people for any reason but you couldn't go alone; you'd never go alone for something like that. You just nodded in response before returning to your own book, continuing to read like you hadn't brought the subject up at all.
Your first date after you began recalling things and getting far too deep in what could only be sentimental thoughts went okay. A friend of your friend's, Sehyoon, who was an art major and knew of you but didn't know you; he'd never really integrated himself into the small friend circle on campus but Byeongkwan spoke highly of him.
He was sweet; a gentleman. Pretty much anything you could really ask for but you noticed little things; minute things that didn't even matter. You felt like you were being unreasonable or judgmental despite only picking out things that didn't match. Didn't match what, exactly?
He wasn't Junhee.
The realization had you suddenly shooting up from your seat, interrupting the poor male's answer to your question about his major and spilling out several apologies as you even fought to put money down for your own food. It took quite a few more 'I'm really sorry's before you were speeding out of the small restaurant; you'd make sure to call him later.
You found yourself in the only place that made sense: banging hard on the door of the RA for your building, hardly caring if you disturbed anyone else.
'What?' was the greeting you received from a very frustrated Donghun, wanting nothing more than to be left alone again. And yes, you called each other your friend.
'We have a really, really big problem.'
Being a mutual friend and despite not wanting to get involved in anyone's "drama", he spent two hours talking you out of it, down from it and against it, reminding you just why your newfound feelings for your best friend were a problem. He even reminded you of your comment, three years ago, about how you could never possibly like Junhee; how he remembered that and you didn't, you didn't care to ask.
You returned home a wreck, tired and wanting to burn your own emotions. Were you really uncovering some unconsciously buried feelings or did you just like the fact that he /saw/ you? He'd seen you nearly on your deathbed sick.
He'd seen you living in a depression nest for two weeks, barely able to get out a bed and eating nothing but honey buns and cereal.
He'd seen you grieve family members and pets; seen you walk into the rain and scream at the top of your lungs because of how lost in despair you'd been.
He'd seen you drunk and stupid; he'd seen you the night after a one night stand and hungover to the point you wanted to fight the sun.
He'd sat by you absolutely throwing your guts up.
He had seen every single side of you and you'd seen the same from him but it only started to stack further and further.
You knew his favorite songs because God forbid he only have one. You knew his favorite color, favorite food and his weird retirement plan that involved a tiny petting zoo of his own that he refused to just call a farm. Your pins for everything were each other's birthdates and he was the only other name on your bank account. Why?
Staring down at the menu you'd seen over a hundred times, you were sure, you couldn't decide on just what sounded good and part of you just wanted everything. Those moments staring at words that started to blur, you noticed Junhee hadn't touched his menu and kept shifting around, visibly uncomfortable for reasons you couldn't possible figure out.
'It's unlike you to not be going off about the food here.. or already having ordered your favorite drink that, I recall, you said you'd die without if you didn't have it every time you came here,' you began, closing the menu and setting it down with narrowed eyes, 'what's going on?'
'It's stupid. Just.. order and get some food, I'll probably just eat later. I'm not really hungry.'
That was a bold faced lie and you knew it, the concern growing. 'And, what's the oh-so-stupid reason, exactly?'
It took him a minute, shifting more and acting like a child who had gotten in trouble. 'I, uh.. I can't really..' he gestured around, lips pursed and growing even more upset by the second, you could tell by the way he was trying to stop himself from frowning. 'Can't really afford it.' You were college students, it wasn't the world's biggest secret if you couldn't afford something.
'Do you really think I'm just going to eat in front of you?' You snorted, avoiding any comment that would further his being upset over the situation, 'Don't worry about it and order, okay?'
Financial struggles were no quiet matter between the two of you and never had been since you started school. Junhee lived off campus in an apartment with two shitty roommates, a terrible part time job and parents that pretty much didn't care if he perished on the side of the street somewhere. You, on the other hand, which you didn't like bringing up, were doing fine but only because your parents dropped something of an 'allowance' into your account for foods and necessities.
You ignored his attempt to argue and told him if he didn't order something, you were going to do it for him; he shut up.
The next day, you took a trip to the bank.
You could feel eyes on you as you splayed across the couch, staring at the ceiling and contemplating life and all of it's annoyances. No question left you but even if you wanted to say something, you were cut off.
'So, are you going to tell me what's going on? For the past.. three weeks? You've been asking me all sorts of weird stuff,' Junhee inquired, frowning thoughtfully, 'Are you testing me or something? Trust me, yes, I remember every single second I've spent with you. I remember every word you've said, the names of every guy you've been with and the ones I'd like to fight. I remember every birthday and gift I've given you and the ones you've given me. Yes, I remember your favorite things and everything so, what's the deal?'
It sounded sentimental at first but then you noticed that all too familiar waiver in his voice and out of the corner of your eye, you noticed his hands fiddling with the chain bracelet that had adorned his wrist for five years; he wanted to cry. A crying Junhee was something no one ever wanted on your hands and you briefly recalled a phone call from a very panicked Byeongkwan because of just that but you were letting your thoughts get off topic.
'I think I'm in love with you.'
'If you don't want to be fri-'
You were both cut off as your head turned to finally look at him, soaking in the unreadable expression on his features when someone busted through the door; 'Look!'
Both of you looked towards your two friends that invited themselves into your door, one holding a new cat and the other looking just as pleased with the announcement but it gradually dropped. 'Shit, did we interrupt something?' Of course, you always knew when you finally and truly confessed to someone that it would be Byeongkwan who ruined the whole thing; you used it as an escape, though, reminding yourself of what the confession could do to your friendship.
'New minion, I see,' you chimed, sitting up and ignoring the question, both of them, as you rose to greet Donghun's new pet. You were ignorant to the looks shared between the three boys and you were happy about that.
Now, you just had to avoid it ever coming up again until it was forgotten.
Junhee, however, didn't want that to happen.
After about an hour of chitchatting and ignoring the gaze of your best friend, you excused yourself under the excuse of having a meetup for a class, despite it being your dorm, and managed to weasel your way out. There was really nowhere to go, no one to talk to and you surely didn't have any plans for the next week; you ended up at the café on campus. It was quiet and filled mostly with a few students doing work and the two members of staff behind the counter, one eventually joining you at the table. He didn't say anything, waited for you to stop your dramatic Disney scene and acknowledge him.
'Would you date me, Yu?'
Taken a bit off guard, he ended up snorting. 'I can't tell if this is a trap or you want the genuine answer,' he replied, crossing his arms atop the table, 'but, on the hand that it's serious.. probably. I mean, I definitely wouldn't turn you down. We've known each other for a few years, hang out on a regular basis.. get along and have a lot of similar interests. So, yeah.'
The answer made your lips draw into a deep frown and you tapped your fingers against the cup, soaking up every word. 'Even though we're friends? What if we broke up?'
A soft 'ah' came from him as he realized what was really going on and he shrugged, thinking it over for a minute or two. 'We're both adults and I don't believe either of us would do something so that the breakup would be something that could ruin our friendship. I understand it would be like.. friends then it being intimate then back to friends, but I think both of us are mature enough to deal with that and not let it bother us too much.' He spoke like he'd been through it several times and in reality, it had only been once, a small fling with a mutual friend but they still seemed pretty okay. 'Is this about Jun?'
'Does everyone know?' You groaned out, releasing the cup to lean back and rub your hands over your face in defeat, 'I.. I told him I think I love him then Kwan and Donghun showed up and I bailed because now I don't actually want to face him or admit to ever actually saying it. I do! I do love him! I don't.. I don't want to lose him, you know?'
You could see the way the latter looked at you, sympathetic and calculating what words wouldn't just stress you out further. 'Look.. I know you don't want to hear it from me or anyone else for that matter because you want to keep saying it'll ruin your friendship when in reality, you don't like the idea that you could hurt each other, I was the same way with Donghun, so I understand.. but, you should really see all this from an outsider's point of view. Junhee looks at you like you hung the moon and you look at him like he painted the stars; yes, it's been like that since I've met you and a reminder, it's been years. I don't know what took you so long to realize it or if you've just avoided it this whole time but anyone would have to be blind not to see it. Now,' he sighed deeply as he finished and straightened, 'I think you should probably go and talk to him about it considering you just confessed then ditched but it's your choice. I don't think you have anything to worry about.. for either of you. You're the most loyal person I know, so I have no doubt you'd ever hurt him in a way that would ruin you guys and he can barely swat at a fly or sit still through hearing thunder, you think he's going to do something? Regardless.. one of these days, soon, you'll have to face it and I really hope you don't go into it with the cliché reason of your friendship being ruined.'
The words sank in slow and you wanted nothing but to cry your eyes out because he was right; he always was and you hated it. It took a while for you to speak and he seemed okay with that, briefly leaving you to fill a couple orders before returning. 'I know you're leaving for break tomorrow.. tell him before then.' Those were his last words before he bid you good luck and a good night, heading back to his own dorm, most likely to call Donghun now that he'd projected just a little bit.
Irrationality was a word that would be in your character description box and the word stupid could very well be right next to it because when you got home, you packed your bag and decided to leave early, not bothering to let any of your friends know. You needed time and you were being selfish, so selfish to the point you thought maybe he'd just hate you when you got back.
Oh boy were you wrong.
Two days into being back home and confiding in your mother who promptly smacked you upside the back of the head, you found yourself sitting on the porch and moping, split between what to do. You suspected the boys were a bit angry with you when you noticed the ample amount of texts, voicemails, social messages and phone calls that had gone ignored; you caught a glimpse of the absolute book Yuchan took the time to send you, leaving you kind of scared to even open it. It didn't take long for the guilt to set in but you chose to wait until you were back on campus to deal with it.
Or at least, that was your plan.
'So, I know you've never been a fan of confrontation but.. you've never been the type to run away.'
The sudden voice startled you as you hadn't even noticed anyone pull up and of course, upon looking up, you were met with the face you were trying to avoid the most. Junhee stood at the end of the sidewalk looking pitiful and shifting his weight in a nervous manner. You didn't bother trying to speak, not knowing what to say but you did wait for the rant, the berating that you deserved; that wasn't who he was though.
He even stayed quiet for a minute or two, making his way closer to sit on the steps, looking up towards your figure. 'Did you mean it?'
You could have answered right away, poured your heart out and let out the tears you'd been holding in since the moment you left. Instead, you stayed quiet and pulled your knees closer to your chest, not trusting your own voice. He didn't relent though, reaching out to lightly nudge your knee.
'That's all I need to know.. did you mean it? If.. if you didn't I can just leave and we don't have to bother with it again.'
'And, if I did..?' Finally finding your voice, you looked over to him, chewing hard on your lower tier, nervous and kind of wanting to throw up.
You could see him thinking it over before a faint smile showed up. 'I'd most likely cry.. but I'm going to cry either way,' he began, shrugging his shoulders while moving up to sit next to you, 'I'd also tell you that I love you, too and I've been trying to tell you that for years now.'
The confession made your heart flutter, your skin burn and the butterflies being kept back burst in delight in your gut. 'Even.. after everything we've been through? Everything you've seen..?'
Junhee nodded. 'Mhm. I'd go through it all again and what do you mean? I've seen nothing but you.'
#fairieswritings#a.c.e#junhee#clicheprompts#a.c.e scenarios#a.c.e reactions#a.c.e x reader#a.c.e imagines#a.c.e drabbles#kpop#kpop scenarios#kpop drabbles#kpop reactions#kpop imagines
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Aran and Aone as dads headcanons !
requested by @kara-grayson04: would you do aone and aran as dads?
a/n: MY BOYS!!! i love these two sm and i actually meant to post smth for aone before but i lost inspiration :((( it was an imagine not headcanons and i struggle to write sometimes-- maybe i’ll rewrite it and post it but idk (it was based off of his concern that people didn’t like to sit next to him on the train) and... aran needs more content !!! i’m literally in love with him... ALSO TIMESKIP ARAN HAS ME 😳👉👈 LIKE THE BEARD??? he looks SO GOOD.. Also.. oh my god im so sorry it took me so long to post these 😭 i literally have no excuse i was just tired
warning(s): manga spoilers
Ojirou Aran
hello sir, your hand in marriage pls <3
He’d be SUCH A GOOD DAD
I have no doubts in my mind that he’d literally be the best husband, father, brother in law, grandfather, uncle, cousin, sibling--
This is me saying that I love Aran and I think he’s perfect
I also think this way about Kita
Kita Shinsuke, and Ojirou Aran, please... your hands in marriage
Osamu too-- he can cook 🥰
But Atsumu??? 🤢🤢
That’s a joke he’s one of my favorite characters
Anyways back to Aran <3
But like him having twins-- one boy and one girl
The amount of dread he had before they were born because all he could think about was what if they turned out like the Miya twins
But!! when they were born and weren't the devils incarnate he was like 🥰🥰
His twins are both super energetic and never sit down
But they're like!! so happy all the time and he just
*heart clench*
He'd literally do anything for them it's so cute
When they were born, he'd spend hours in their room after you went to sleep
He would like cradle them and tell them stories and all that :((
Since he's a pro volleyball player, he wouldn't be able to spend as much time as he'd actually like with them so that's why he'd stay up late just in their room
If they ever start crying in the middle of the night, he'd immediately let you go back to sleep and he'd take care of it !!
He thinks it's fair because you take care of them so much when he's away for games and you also birthed them so like
Whenever he's home, you don't have to do half of the things you normally do
As the twins grow older, you start bringing them to his games and he's like "!!!" cause they're his pride and joy 🥺🥺🥺
He'd show them off to his teammates after the game
Aran would be like "Look!! Here are my two angels who are nothing like the Miyas 🥰🥰"
Atsumu meeting them at MSBY vs Red Falcons cause you had time off from work and the twins wanted to go
The twins knowing what their dad has said about Atsumu and being like "👁️👄👁️ my dad says you're rude" and he just *clenches heart* cause its so cute yet so sad
CAUSE LIKE yeah they're insulting him but the look on their faces is just... so cute
That's kinda masochistic, Atsumu
Actually Atsumu's a lot better than he was in high school as an adult so they do warm up to him, sadly 😔
Aran is definitely the type of guy you see in public with his kids and immediately go like "wow, he's definitely a great father" because he just radiates that energy
okay i do this sometimes idk if others do
He never yells too much at his kids and always talks things out maturely with them and its 🥺🥺
He tries not to spoil them too much but definitely does on accident CJWJCIE
They'll come back from the store and you'll see toys in their hands and you just give him one look and he's like
LISTEN
They're just too damn cute for him to say no to sometimes
But he won't spoil them to the point of them becoming obnoxious!! he knows the limits and has set them !!
When you were pregnant, he was literally so helpful and you just... hardly had to do anything
He wasn't as strict with making you do LITERALLY nothing like Sakusa, but he definitely tried to do everything he could
Absolutely no!! carrying of anything!!
He's a strong volleyball player who was one of the best back in high school-- he refuses to let his wife carry anything !!
All in all, Aran would be the best dad of haikyuu and i would write more but that would be too long
Aone Takanobu
ohmygod
I literally love him so much hes just... his current concern knocked me out
I would sit next to you Aone 😔
anyways
Aone would definitely be a great dad but he'd be a bit aloof unlike Aran would be
He wouldn't really be too sure what to do cause he's scared his own kid would be afraid of him :(
For a while, he'd be extremely hesitant to take care of your guys' daughter because he just :(( he was scared that she would start crying
Turns out his daughter literally is a ball of sunshine who thinks her dad is!! the coolest!!
I mean he's really good at volleyball and he's so BIG 🌟👄🌟
L i k e
He's literally her walking jungle gym-- you can pry this headcanon from my dead body i REFUSE to see anything else
He would be in the kitchen drinking coffee first thing in the morning and suddenly, he hears her tiny footsteps and then theres something weighing down his arm
SURPRISE!!!!! it's Misa!!!!
Forgive me, i was binging Maid-sama
She's all like "dad! dad!!" and then she'll start rambling on and he just
heart clench
You both were such a blessing in his life because neither of you were afraid of him 🥺🥺
Aone and you met during college!!
You guys didn't go to the same college but you met him on the bus hehe
🥰🥰 and you sat next to him without hesitation and actually tried to start a conversation with him because he looked to be a similar age
Now you two are married and have your cute daughter, Misaki 🥺🥺💖
Futakuchi wasn't allowed to babysit her by himself because he said something bad in front of Misa once and she asked about it later to Aone and you at dinner
Futakuchi getting a call from Aone and it's completely silent
He got the message (๑•﹏•)
Hinata is Misa's favorite uncle!!
because Futakuchi said bad words that anyones not supposed to say >:((((
Hinata likes to tell her stories of his interactions with her dad and shes all like ✧\(>o<)ﾉ✧ cause!! her dad's so!! cool!!
Since Aone works in construction (i think), he's super strong so she's always testing his limits
"Dad... can you lift the couch?" "... yes."
He lifts the couch and she's squealing like "WOAHHHHH!!!!!!!!!!!!!! DADS SO COOL!!!!!!"
stop shes so proud that Aone's her dad and it's just so cute
all of her friends think that Aone's the coolest as well because Misa never stops talking about him!!
"Aone-san, you're so cool!!! Misa-chan was right!!" "RIGHT?? RIGHT?? My dads awesome!!!"
He's never felt so much happiness
When you were pregnant, he was this huge ball of anxiety... the poor thing...
He's super nervous he's gonna accidentally hurt you in some way and so for a while, he refuses to touch you im-
He doesn't know his own strength and if smth happens to you, he will literally die
It took you scolding him for like 20 minutes for him to finally understand
He's still hesitant to hold you when you guys are in bed tho cause he's 😔😔
Aone would definitely struggle at the beginning as a father but he's literally such a great dad after he lets go of his worries!!
#aran ojiro#aran ojiro x reader#aran ojirou x reader#aran ojirou imagine#aran imagine#hq aran#aran fluff#aran x reader#aone x reader#aone x y/n#aone fluff#aone takanobu#aone takanobu x reader#aone takanobu imagine#hq aone#hq imagines#haikyuu fanfiction#haikyuu fanfic#haikyuu#haikyuu scenarios#haikyuu!!#haikyuu headcanons#haikyuu imagine#hq x reader#haikyuu x reader#ojirou aran#ojirou aran x reader#ojirou aran imagine
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Oooh oh oh! Me!! I have an AU!! Maybe even two? Both are modern!AU’s so feel free to go with anything modern in general + bucketheads but I also had these in mind:
1. Lately I’ve read this yoga instructor Din AU from @gaiuswrites and I was wondering about instructor-like AUs in general? Yoga Din owns my heart now but like if you want to go with like idk math tutor Paz or motorcycle instructor Boba or something - by all means: go ahead
2. KINDERGARTEN AU. Are they the teacher?? Or do they have a crush on the teacher???? Who knows? Perhaps even a babysitter??? Just kids + mandos make me vibrating with excitement (*ahem* I’m sure it keeps them excited in another way too but that’s a thot for another day)
Ooooohhh this is good, I like both of these. And since I'm doing two im doing them under a cut so the post isn't super long...
Instructor AU & Kindergarten AU
Din-
Instructor AU
Ok so for this AU I think Din being a sign language instructor would be an interesting concept. And you are taking his classes because you need them for your job or you have a family member that is deaf.
Din's classes aren't that big and he usually has his son, Grogu, with him, who is mute and only speaks through sign
One evening you came to class and you were the only one to show up that night so the two of you mostly talked and got to know each other
That’s how you found out that Din himself was deaf in one ear and that’s why he knew sign even before he got Grogu
The two of you grew closer and after that night, Din asked you on a date
Kindergarten AU
So for Din, you are Grogu’s kindergarten teacher and Din is one of the dads that you just watch and are like goddamn if only he was single, what only made it worse was he was on the local fire department
Then Grogu bites another child and you have to call Din into your class after school to have a small talk. That small talk ends up taking a lot longer than you thought and as Grogu played the two of you chatted, Din explained that he was a single parent and had adopted Grogu because after he saved him from an abandoned building Grogu clung to Din and refused to leave his side
After that Din started waiting longer when he picked up Grogu just so he could chat with you for a little bit, and finally one day you shyly had him your phone number saying that you’d like to chat more away from the school
After that, the two of you end up going on numerous dates, both with and without Grogu. You find out Din is a secret romantic and he is always super sweet on the dates
Then he picked you up for a date one night and drove you to a small park away from town. There he set up a picnic and it was so cute and sweet and perfect, but then he had proposed. (After you said yes, it was practically night and Din may or may not have made love to you on that picnic blanket)
Boba-
Instructor AU
So for Boba, I thought it would be really cool for him to be a self-defense instructor and you just moved to the city and wanted to take classes because you worked late at night and just wanted to be prepared
Boba usually taught in bigger classes, but when he saw that you were struggling with a few things he invited you to come at a different time so he could teach you one on one (and it had nothing to do with the fact that he had found himself very attracted to you, or how his co-instructor Fennec had been teasing him about you)
The first solo session went smoothly and you found yourself blushes and biting your lip whenever Boba would come up behind you to show how to move your arm or move your hips
The tension only grew within your solo lessons with Boba, but neither of you acknowledged it and just working around it
Then one lesson Boba decided to test your skills in a one-on-one spar, the first few times he overcame you, but to both of your surprise, you were able to get him on the floor and pin him. That tension, yeah that doesn’t exactly exist anymore but you do need help walking to Boba’s car afterward
Kindergarten AU
So Boba in this AU is going to be more of a Babysitter AU. So Boba owns some big corporation and that means he works late nights often so he doesnt get to be home often in the evenings, so enter you a poor college student that comes in and watches his son, Jango.
You never ask about little Jango’s mother and Boba never talks about it, which doesn’t bother you.
Boba pays you more than he should but shrugs it off saying that you are a good babysitter, Jango loves you, and he remembers being a broke college student
The nights that you work for Boba,you always make sure to cook a warm meal for both Jango and Boba, keeping Boba’s portion in the microwave for when he gets home and making sure there is enough leftovers for lunch tomorrow for Boba
You tend to work on homework on his coffee table after Jango goes to bed until Boba comes home. One night you end up falling asleep while studying and when you wake up you findyourself in Boba’s bed. You jump up surprised only for Boba to walk out from his ensuite bathroom saying, “Easy little one, youre too tired to drive hime tonight so you are staying here.”
Bonus: You both definitely end up fucking and the next morning you wake up cuddled to his chest and without even opening his eyes Boba tlls you you should move in with them
Paz-
Instructor AU
So Paz is like canonically a man that knows his way around weapons, so for this AU I want to make Paz a shooting/gun instructor
You take his class for some reason or another and you are just instantly taken by this huge man that is just so gentle with how he hands both his guns and the people he is teaching
Once one of the girls in your small class brought her small child because she didn’t have anyone to watch him so Paz puts earmuffs of the kid and carries him around on his shoulders the whole time, and you watched him sneak the kid a sucker after the class was over
Paz tends to linger around you alot when teaching or watching you hold or handle the guns, and the two of you just pine after eachother throughout the entire course
On the last day of class you ask Paz shyly if he had plans after class, he had planned to go drinking with Din but he canceled immediately, and told you no and the two of you went to a small restaurant and ended up staying and talking so long that you were there until closing
Kindergarten AU
Paz is the teacher in this AU and you are a single mother of twins, a boy and girl
One day you are late to pick them up because your boss had been being a jackass to you, and you walk in ready to start apologizing only to stop speechless, finding Paz on the floor redoing your little girl’s hair and telling a story that had both children captivated
When your kids notice you they get upset, not wanting to leave Paz’s company, you just turn to apologize to Paz for being late, he just tells you that it was fine. But you still feel guilty so you invite him over for dinner as a thank you
That night the four of you each a homemade meal and Paz does nothing but compliment your small home and cooking all the while keeping your kids entertained
Paz stays well after the kids go to bed and as the two of you sit on the couch you talking you find yourself eventually kissing him while sitting on his lap
Sorry for taking so long with this, but I hope you like it!
#anon thots#din djarin x reader#din x reader#boba fett x reader#boba x reader#paz vizsla x reader#paz x reader
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