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#and then did like nothing to address it afterwards
buckysbabygorl · 4 days
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Say It
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Summary: Bucky hates you and the feeling is mutual. It didn’t matter if he was attractive, or heroic, he was a grade A pain in your ass. The petty insults and the constant staring. It unnerved you. But you know how to get under his skin….
Pairing: Bucky Barnes x Reader
Warnings: SMUT, enemies to lovers, swearing, gun use (no violence), begging, dom/brat dynamics
Sergeant Barnes was nothing more to Y/N than a nuisance.
He was always giving Y/N shit. At the compound, on the streets, during missions. He just never let up.
She did her best to avoid him, as being in the same room as him always brought out her worst.
He made her feel snippy and childish, resorting to constant defenses and quick retorts that left her with her head spinning afterwards.
It always felt like he got the final word, the last laugh, and it drove her crazy.
But with all his insults he dealt out, she had one solid retort. The one thing that could get under his skin… his army title.
Sergeant.
She wasn’t sure why, but nothing else phased him.
For him, it was the way she phrased it. Laced with disdain and contempt, throwing his authority back in his face.
His title be damned, she didn’t care. He may have been an authority figure in the army but he was by no means her superior. They were equals on the field and she made sure to remind him of that every chance he got.
She never called him by anything else, other than a few nicknames like asshole, dick, etc.
Never Barnes, never Bucky, never James.
Just sergeant.
And today was no exception.
Barnes and Y/N had both failed their firearms tests, or rather, neither had shown for their scheduled tests due to an emergency mission. Both were extremely skilled in their previous tests, but without passing the second time, neither of them would be reinstated as agents.
Not wanting to take any chances, Fury mandated bi-weekly training for the two. Why they had to train at the range at the same time, was beyond them.
“Your stance is off.”
Y/N huffed, glancing at Barnes out of the corner of her eye.
He stood to the side, arms crossed over his vest, gaze piercing under neath his protective glasses.
“Noted,” she chided, “Though your input wasn’t asked for, it’s noted.”
He chuckled, “Just trying to help. Wouldn’t want to fail your second time, would you?”
She reminded herself to unclench her jaw, nearly shattering her teeth in annoyance.
“I didn’t fail. I missed it. Same as you did.”
She sturdied herself, aiming for her target at the far end of the range.
She calmed herself, breathing in and out. In… and out… in—
“You’re gonna miss if you keep that stance.”
She growled, “Will you shut up and just let me shoot?”
“You need all the tips you can get, kid. No need to get hostile.”
A nickname she loathed, kid. He was always throwing it up in conversation, even when addressing her to other people. His constant reminder of how “young and inexperienced” she was.
“If you don’t stop talking, I’ll show you hostile.”
He stalked closer, leaning against the firing stall wall.
“Considering that you’re so inexperienced with a weapon, I don’t feel all that threatened.”
She disarmed her rifle and rested it, turning to face him.
“Right, right.” She said, “I have no experience with weapons. If only I had as much experience as you, tell me another fucking war story while you’re at it Sergeant.”
His face lost its smirk, dark blue eyes now glaring at her.
“You should show me some respect.”
She laughed, turning away from him.
“I should show you nothing, I don’t owe you anything.”
She picked up her rifle again, rearming it and getting set to shoot. She could feel his eyes boring into the side of her head. Her face grew hot, a trickle of sweat slipped down her temple.
Just breathe. Be steady, be certain. Fingers on the trigger, get ready…
“You gonna wait all day?”
That was it.
7 shots fired from the barrel, fast and paced with perfect precision.
7 holes left in the target’s chest, all she needed to pass.
She would be ready for upcoming test.
She disarmed her rifle once more, removing her tactical gloves and tossing them to the table.
“Anything else you care to say?” She asked.
His eyes had never left her form, and he smiled.
“Lucky shots.” He replied, “Hopefully they don’t clock your form on Friday.”
“Fuck you.”
She moved to walk passed him, her arm colliding with his shoulder.
He grabbed her wrist and whipped her back to the stall.
“Don’t talk to me like that. Be quiet and stand here.”
His hands gripped her hips hard, and he spread apart her legs with his. His stubble scraped her cheek, his breath hot on her ear.
He moved her as he spoke, his hands harsh and controlling. “Face the target squarely, feet shoulder width apart. Toes should face the fucking target flex your knees—”
His hips bucked against hers, “Lean forward towards the target. That’s how you take a fucking shot.”
He was breathing hard against her neck, his heart ramming against his chest. She hoped he couldn’t hear hers ramming too.
“That’s isosceles. I prefer the goddamn weaver stance.”
He didn’t move, and neither did she.
“Yeah?” He uttered, “You do that and you expose an area. Right here—”
His large hand wrapped around her torso, nearly encompassing her side.
“—that’s open from your armor. You get shot there, you die.”
She shoved him off of her, whipping around to face him.
“What difference does it make? They’re both accepted stances by the government’s protocol.”
“If you don’t give a fuck about your survival chances then why give a fuck about your test at all? Your stance matters.”
She stepped to him, her face inches from his.
“I give a fuck about my survival chances. Just because I don’t like your old school, traditional bullshit stance, doesn’t mean I don’t give a fuck about my test.”
“You refuse to take any criticism about your skills, it’s gonna get you killed.”
“Oh you’d like that, wouldn’t you?”
Their chests heaved in unison, their eyes wild as they dared to look at one another.
“Then you wouldn’t have to deal with the hot-shot rookie that knows more than you, that could replace you in a heart beat.”
Discarding his eyewear, he scoffed in her face. As he stalked forward, her back inched towards the opposite stall wall.
“You think you’re so much better than me, than everybody on this team. You couldn’t replace me, I’m one of the strongest and most experienced members on this team. You’re nothing but an entitled brat with your head in your ass. I can do more than you could possibly imagine.”
Things were turning dangerous. She hated that he insulted her age, she hated that he called her inexperienced, she hated that he was constantly fucking with her head. She hated that he looked so fucking hot when he was this angry, standing right in front of her.
“Oh yeah?”
She grabbed the tactical gloves and shoved them into his chest.
“Then why don’t you show me how it’s done—”
He watched as her lips snarled, hand pressed against his chest.
Don’t say it. Don’t you fucking say it.
She smirked.
“Sergeant.��
His hands flew up so fast.
Gloves fallen to the floor, her hands were pinned to the wall.
He pushed her up with his hips, body taut against her.
Her eyes were blown wide, lip dropping in awe.
“Say it again. I dare you.” He growled through gritted teeth, noses touching.
She urged her body not to tremble at his grasp, heat pooling in her abdomen.
He was testing her. Playing some twisted mind game. He wouldn’t hurt her, he wanted to see if she backed down. She wouldn’t.
“Sergeant.”
Blue eyes turned black.
His mouth was hard on hers, fingers digging desperately in her wrists. He pressed his hips forward, pushing his hardness into her clothed core.
She gasped into his lips and he took the chance to battle with her tongue. He ground himself against her again.
He pulled away, taking in her shocked gaze.
“You wanna mouth off to me? Give me attitude?”
He ducked his head into her neck and she shuttered. His hips continued their bucking.
“No respect… I’ll teach you how to behave.”
Her head was spinning, thoughts running wild from the man in front of her. All this hatred, all this fighting, now his hands were releasing hers and stripping off her vest.
Her hands were free now, why wasn’t she pushing him away?
She grabbed his shoulders to stable herself, watching as his hand dipped into her waistband. The other gripped the underside of her ass, keeping her clothed pussy right against his hardening cock.
He laughed to himself, “Is this you showing me hostile? Look at you now, nothing to say.”
She stifled a moan as his fingers drifted across her panties.
“Barnes, I—”
He awed, “There it is. No ‘sergeant’ this time, huh kid?”
He rubbed at her clit through the fabric, watching as she struggled to keep her composure.
Her nails dug into his shoulders, and he hissed.
“Don’t call me that.”
He leaned in to her neck, fingers shifting her panties to the side.
His voice vibrated against her throat.
“You don’t like it? Be good and I’ll call you something else.”
She gasped as his fingers entered her, strong and purposeful.
He groaned at her wetness, licking the skin at the base of her neck.
Her legs clenched around his waist, he rewarded her with another finger.
“If I’d known fucking you would have shut you up, I would’ve done it sooner.”
She swallowed a sigh as his fingers pressed against that perfect spot.
“You aren’t fucking me. You’re teasing me.”
He bit her neck and she gasped again.
“Be patient sweetheart, I’ll fuck you soon enough.”
As his thumb circled her clit while his fingers pumped into her, her eyes rolled back. Head drawn back, she couldn’t help but moan.
Bucky hummed as he fucked her with his fingers, “You like that?”
She bit her lip as he continued his teasing, his face moving away from her neck.
He leaned back and grinned, “Is that what you want? Me calling you sweetheart while I fuck you?”
“I—”
Her moan interrupted her as he picked up his pace.
He tsked as he rested his forehead against hers.
“Use your words. You wanted to before.”
She whimpered as he withdrew from her, angry with herself for giving into him as much as she had. She couldn’t let him win like this, she had to bite back a little.
“No,” she huffed, “Try something else to turn me on.”
He smirked at the challenge, and his hands dipped back into her waistband.
She wasn’t prepared for him sliding her pants to the floor, hiking her up further onto the wall.
“Fine,” he said, “but you’ll have to ask nicely.”
He was as soft as before, his fingers moving at a harsher pace. The newfound angle left her crying out, desperately clawing at his arms in pleasure.
“What do you think, huh? Maybe baby?”
He dipped his head to her chest, sucking at the delicate skin.
He didn’t need to watch her to know what she liked, he could feel it in her body. The beating of her heart and the rapid breaths she gave as he pulled her closer and closer to her peak.
“Princess?” He drawled, “No, no…”
He curled his fingers, pulling another whimper.
“How about Angel?”
She clenched around his fingers and gasped as he bit into her breast.
“Oh god—.”
“Ask me nicely, Y/N.”
Her back arched against the stall, eyes closed as he edged her.
“Fuck, yes. Yes Barnes, yes.”
She cried out as he drew her orgasm from her, hips rutting into his hand.
He groaned as she coated him with her wetness, the mewing mess he had made of her.
This was so much better than training.
“I knew I’d get you begging. I fucking knew you’d be good for me.”
He pulled her away from the wall, and she stumbled into his arms. Her eyes were glossy, hair tussled and lips swollen. All from him, all his doing. Pride welled in his chest, but he wasn’t done yet.
He spun her around, leaning her against the table that faced the targets.
“Remember what I told you Angel. Feet apart, bend forward.”
He pushed her chest down to the table, hands raking over her backside.
She growled, “I don’t need another damn shooting lesson.”
Her ass stung as his hand spanked her.
“What happened to being good, kid?”
She propped herself up on her elbows, “I said, don’t call me that—ah!”
He smacked her ass again, “That fucking mouth again. Why don’t you put it to good use?”
She sighed as he pushed her down to the table again, “What? You want me to suck you off, that it?”
He chuckled, “No Angel, I’ve got something else in mind.”
His hands swiftly removed his belt, slipping down his pants and boxers to leave him in nothing but his vest and t-shirt.
Pulling out his cock, he teased her entrance. Slowly sliding his head along her glistening folds, listening as she moaned in anticipation.
“You’re gonna say my name.”
He dipped his throbbing head in, feeling her legs tense… her pussy clench around nothing.
He pulled back and she exhaled.
“You’re gonna beg me, and you’re gonna say my name.”
She attempted to rut back against him, desperately hoping she’d take him in.
She couldn’t say his name, she couldn’t beg. She’d never live that down.
His metal hand held her in place, not letting up.
“Say it Angel,” he demanded, “Beg me to fuck you.”
“Screw you Barnes—”
His thumb was harsh on her clit, and she yelped at the rough circles he drew into her.
“I’ll leave you here, a wet fucking mess. Don’t test me, Y/N. Say it.”
“Fuck,” she cried out as he teased her with his fingers. “Fine I—”
He put the head of his cock in again, stretching her entrance.
“Bucky, please.”
He hummed, “Better. But not what I want.”
She felt herself grow cold in her exposure, Bucky pulling away and hand leaving her side.
She whipped around, “What? I said it!”
He smirked at her, shaking his head.
“First name, Angel. And beg.”
“Are you fucking serious?”
He could see it in her eyes, how desperate she was. Yearning for more, but so damn proud.
“Just say it, Angel. All you have to do.”
She hissed through her teeth, so touch starved she could cry. This would be the death of her, her legs shaking and wetness pooling at her thighs. Fuck, she had to.
“For god’s sake James, please just fuck me.”
He strode forward with ease, pushing her back onto the table.
He knew she’d give.
“That’s my girl.”
Her hips were around his waist in a second, hands in her hair and kissing her roughly as she moaned beneath him.
He bucked his hips against hers, sliding his cock along her dripping entrance.
He lined himself up and thrust into her, her head rolling back in a loud cry.
He groaned as he filled her up, her pussy tight around him.
“Fuck, you feel perfect.”
He rutted into her at a relentless pace, unforgiving as his hands gripped her waist.
“So good, Angel. Could fuck you forever with a pussy like this.”
Her fingers curled into his hair, gripping tightly as he pounded her harder against the table.
“You want that? You want me to fuck you over and over? ‘Til you can’t say nothing but my name?”
She exhaled a yes, mind too clouded from pleasure to stop herself. She was melting in his hands now, completely at his whim.
“Say it Angel, say my name.”
She was going to cum again, her vision growing blurry as it pooled in her stomach.
“James, oh god, James!”
She came hard, the lights blinding her as her orgasm took over her body.
His thrusts grew harder, determined to keep her cumming until he finished.
“That’s it Angel, cum for me. So fucking pretty when you cum.”
His hips stuttered as she looked at him, a moaning mess with her pleading eyes.
“Cum inside me James, please.”
He was done for.
He finished with a groan, body falling limp against her. Their chests rose and fell in unison, their breaths filling the quiet room.
It was dawning on them now, the wild scenario that had played itself out.
How did they get here?
Too tired to question it, Bucky lifted himself off of her.
He gently wrapped his hands around her waist, guiding her to sit up.
Silent, they look at each other.
Their faces were unreadable, dripping with sweat and cheeks swelled with red.
She tried to discern that look in his eyes, she never knew what he was thinking.
Unless he was right in her face, snarling at her, then she knew what he felt.
Anger, frustration, hatred.
This look… now that was something new.
He cleared his throat, running a hand through his hair.
“Okay…” he started, “no more ‘kid’ and no more ‘sergeant’.”
She swallowed, not trusting her voice she responded with a nod.
He nodded back. “No more fighting. It’s exhausting.”
She was taken aback that, and he laughed at the look of shock on her face.
“C’mon. It is.” He pointed between them, “Our energy is much better spent on this.”
She laughed, shaking her head. “Wow, just like that?”
He nodded. “Mhm, just like that. You drive me crazy but, I can’t say I haven’t been thinking about this since the day we met.”
Speechless again, she stared at him as he continued.
“You’re frustrating, you make me worried, you—hell you’re reckless and it scares me. Feels like I have to keep an eye on you all the time.”
“You are frustrating. You don’t trust me to take care of myself or the team.” She said
He shook his head, “Not true. You’re a great agent, but I meant what I said. You don’t take criticism.”
She scoffed, “And you criticize too much.”
Still shocked at the events prior, she didn’t shove him away as he moved to hold her.
She shocked herself further by wrapping her arms lazily around him.
“Well,” he said, kissing the top of her head, “we’ll work on that.”
~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~
Sloppily written but hey, we get what we get and don’t get upset.
Taglist:
@pigeonmama
@dontputyourfckingdrinkonmytable
@dumb-ass-3
@cuddlycalcifer @babyblue-07 @babybluereads @lonewolf471 @niiight-dreamerrrr @fandomsfallnomore @elliee1497 @godspeedlover @sexwithhiddlesbatch @shower-me-with-roses @yougottalovefandoms @rebekahdawkins @gentlybarnes
Bucky tag list:
@emmabarnes
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fairyhaos · 1 month
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how seventeen comfort their s/o after a nightmare
requested by anon !
masterlist
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seungcheol
one moment, all the terror is consuming you and you feel like you're trapped in all of your worst fears and the next, you're being jolted awake and you find yourself sobbing into a warm chest, seungcheol having grabbed you and hugged you so suddenly that it literally woke you out of your nightmare. knows you better than you know yourself. holds you in his arms even after you drift off once more
jeonghan
“what's wrong, baby? shh, don't worry, it was just a nightmare, it didn't actually happen, i'm here.” very good at verbally reasoning with you through your hazy panic, even as he's stroking your hair and hugging you tight. helps your tears go away in a matter of minutes, and holds you and talks to you about everything and nothing to help you fall asleep again
joshua
instantly comforts you by constantly reassuring you of his presence. is all “i'm right here sweetheart, don't worry, i'm not going anywhere, i'm here for you” and just holds you, rocking you from side to side as you cry and tremble in his arms before the aftershocks die down and the warmth of his comforting presence helps you finally relax
junhui
makes the most distressed sounds in response to your distress. might very well end up crying with you, but he gives rlly good hugs so you help each other calm down too. you eat ice cream out of the tub together after, talking about nonsensical things bc you don't want to think about the contents of your nightmare. but that's okay, bc junhui will be there by your side always
hoshi
“you're crying? are you crying? oh, baby, why are you crying, don't cry, it's okay.” he's all big, genuine comfort, wiping at your eyes with his hands even though you scared him by waking him up whilst sobbing your eyes out. he jumps into helping you instantly, holding you until the trembling subsides and you feel like yourself again
wonwoo
scoops you up into his arms without a second thought. he's so worried for you, because you've been rendered incoherent by the nightmare, but he'll hold you without a question until your heart stops beating so fast that he can feel it vibrating in your chest, keeping you protected in his arms. 
woozi
like some sort of sixth sense, he always wakes up whilst you're contemplating whether it's silly to wake him up after you've had a nightmare. doesn't even have to say anything, just looks at you, takes your hand and drags you out of bed to make a snack in the middle of the night, taking ur mind off the nightmare and staying by your side until you feel better. 
minghao
“you're okay, you're okay, shhh it's okay, you're okay. i'm here with you, everything's okay.” biggest focus is reassuring you that you're safe, that you're with him and nothing can hurt you here. he might address why exactly you had that particular nightmare later, but right now, his biggest priority is keeping you safe. 
mingyu
wakes up to the sound of you crying and does not even think before sitting upright in an instant, making his head feel all achy but that doesn't matter because he needs to help you, right now, needs to make whatever is hitting you go away in an instant. it's almost instinctive, the urge to protect you. makes you instant ramen afterwards to get rid of the post-nightmare shivers
dokyeom
he's a light sleeper, so the moment he hears any sound of distress from you he's blinking awake, blindly reaching for you and trying to pull you closer into his chest, even if you haven't woken up yet. makes soothing noises to you until you relax. if you didn't wake, then he'll just hold you til he falls asleep again, but if you did, then he'll tell you he loves you again and again until you believe it
seungkwan
when he wakes up to you tapping his shoulder hesitantly, breathing still a little shaky, he knows that you've had a nightmare. can tell instantly whether you wanna talk about it or not, and when you don't, he simply shifts a little so you can hug him in bed, listening to the sound of his heartbeat until you fall asleep again, safe. 
vernon
shakes you out of your nightmare with the most concerned tone in his voice, and he's all groggy with sleep but he cares so much and the relief that you feel from seeing his bleary face in the darkness makes you cry out of love, overwhelmed. he doesn't question it, just lets you cry into his shirt until you feel better
chan
he is, unfortunately, a rather heavy sleeper, so you wake yourself up by crying before he's able to wake up to comfort you. it's okay tho, because even if he's a heavy sleeper, he's also, like, a telepath, so the moment you're awake he's also blinking his eyes open too, reaching for you before he's even woken up fully, doing everything within his power to make your hurt and your pain go away. 
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reactions tags: @weird-bookworm @minhui896 @bunnyiix @slytherinshua @haowrld @belladaises @newgirlygirl @moonlitskiiies @mirxzii @wonranghaeee @yonabutnotyuna @crackedpumpkin @wqnwoos @kthstrawberryshortcake-main @kawennote09 @a-wandering-stay @icyminghao @valenhui @sweet-like-caramel @odxrilove @kyeomyun @chansburgah @pepperonijem @jeonride @kellesvt @kikohao @astrozuya @eightlightstar @onlyyjeonghan @aaniag @starshuas @all-american-fangirl @f1uffyjun @sea-moon-star @nonononranghaee @isabellah29 @mcu-incorrect @hrts4hanniehae @dokyeomkyeom
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anantaru · 1 year
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— their favorite kind of pda (public display of affection)
including kaeya, diluc, kazuha, kaveh, alhaitham, scaramouche, baizhu, heizou x gn! reader
꒰ genre ꒱ — fluff, crack, very sweet n cute
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kaeya likes when it's you who's initiating it instead, when now— you're suddenly looping your hand into his arm and tugging him a bit close too, so you would awkwardly bump into each other and laugh it off afterwards, so that even in the middle of the night, everyone could see and recognize how madly in love the both of you were. another part was the immediate reaction of kaeya, how he‘s trying to play off becoming all flustered, still not addressing it, while his arm was closing around you further until you‘re practically smushed into each other while forgetting where you even wanted to go in the first place. oh, right, good hunter! on the way to eat a good meal, yet kaeya thinks it might be better to take some food home so you could continue your little cuddle session more throughout.
when it comes to master diluc, he— in all his luminosity, adores placing his palm against your lower back. all things considered was it a subtle kind of shifting which you personally did not mind. diluc wasn't a fan of having a dozen pairs of eyes fixated on him, nor on his relationship with you— yes, he couldn't possibly stop it from happening but he at least tried to give nothing away regarding you both, what you were doing wasn't to be anyones business, ever. yet regardless of such, he would never leave an opportunity untouched of showing the public that you're the one who claimed his heart. diluc has the chance now and tenderly placing his palm on your lower back was a perfect motion which would bring the both of you an immediate swift of love and contentment.
kazuha was someone who was never really thinking about it more throughout nor did he never feel like he must show anything of that sorts to the public eye. so, when he meets up with you he'd be very spontaneous with it as well, you could never guess on what it's going to be today or what the man was planning. occasionally he'd get a hold of your hand, or start twirling you around, place his palms on your cheeks and humorously squeeze or add a little peck on the tip of your nose. whatever the case, it was your clear-out favorite, one of his most dearest traits, his spontaneous nature and how he implemented it into your relationship with such ease, this man truly had captured your heart and you won't ever take it away from him.
your sweet boyfriend kaveh was a sucker for holding your hand while sauntering through sumeru city— while, you had to be certain, he'd never let go of you. call it being a small quantity of a protective emotion that would fuel your boyfriends desire to have your palm on his for the entire duration of your meet up. keep in mind, sometimes he doesn't even realize he's still holding onto you and you have to remind him that "love, can you let go of my hand for a bit?" so you could stretch and turn, getting rid of the little burn coming from kaveh's strong grip. "w-why?" would be the next thing you'd hear from him— while now, it's assurance which you were counting on the utmost, because in truth you couldn't get enough of him holding your hand either.
it was quite new for alhaitham to ease into the entire relationship sphere and its supposed doings to consider. for you personally, he can take as much time as he required as long as he was wholly comfortable and happy. while the scribe wasn't a man of big words, he had now, developed a habit of parting his arm for you whenever he was fully engaged and locked into an intriguing new book. lets picture this, you're visiting him after a busy day, while he wouldn't say much he'd now open his arm automatically so you could snugly cuddle yourself into him, slant your cheek into his chest while feeling his tranquil heart beat against your skin as alhaitham carried on to page through his book, which was now, he realizes, a little bit more difficult.
scaramouche wouldn‘t admit it to you, ever, don‘t even think he might consider telling you that, yes, he in fact adores when you catch him entirely off guard and put a little kiss on his cheek— just one, subtle and tender peck on his squishy skin. the next you knew is how he‘s awkwardly averting his gaze and viewing the other direction, just doing something so you wouldn‘t notice the obvious red tint on his milky skin, how the moonlight was glaring right down on it and accentuating his mess of a reaction to you. how come he‘s already longing for another kiss? hidden underneath the night, scaramouche realized it‘s a scenario which certainly had already been written in a romance novel, but it‘s making him feel warm and secured, so he might return the favor now.
you were sure of it, truly, that baizhu had a sweet craving on having you on his lap as much as possible. first of all, it requires no engagement of his own limbs and muscles, he can leisurely stay seated on his work desk while you're taking place— one arm around his neck while you kept the other to yourself or decided to play with his hair. second of all, baizhu could now, talk to you while simultaneously further engage in his research and work load. but not only that, it can also go the exact opposite direction, he especially adored it when out in public, when you're having a sweet picnic and it's baizhu now lowering his head on your lap, so he could rest for a little bit while surrounded by both your scent and the soft melodies of nature— maybe you'll even slant your digits through his hair again, jokes aside, he hopes you'd do it.
how many different kinds of versions regarding pda were accessible to your ordinary person? the pretty detective heizou would make sure to try all of them at least once. your boyfriend thinks it‘s to enjoy and taste each and every thing in life, so why would he only set himself to one of it? in the beginning, heizou will start with holding your hand, testing the waters, while later he‘ll be all over you, mix and matching everything into another. lets say you‘re suddenly meeting a friend, don‘t think he‘d leave you guys to it, heizou will hug you from behind while resting his head on your shoulder, he‘s a perfect smooth-talker and will flawlessly engage himself into the conversation. it‘s known to the public eye that the both of you are inseparable, only showing up as a pair and now you‘re showing it too.
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Blessing
Pairing- Ao'nung x Sully!reader
Summary- You are the twin sister of Lo'ak who is the complete opposite of each other, and when you move with the Metkayina you caught someones eye.
A/N- This was a request
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You are the complete opposite of your twin brother, his was rambunctious you were always calm, he was rebellious you were obedient somewhat. He wanted to fight you wanted to collect plants make medicine help to heal people. But somehow you fit each other just right, he was your best friend as you were his.
One time Lo'ak got into major trouble and at communal dinner someone made a joke calling you "the better twin." And it irked you to the bone. "That's not funny." You would say before returning to your previous conversation. And with all of this your father was very protective sometimes you think it's because he sees your Uncle Tommy in you doesn't wanna lose you how he lost Tommy, he never does talk about your uncle but you can just feel it.
When you had to move to the Metkayina clan it was hard but you tried your best to be happy. And when you got there it was nothing like you expected. They said you had demon blood, that hurt but you deflected it as much as you could. And then there was Ao'nung, when he first saw you he thought that his heart was going to explode in his chest your beauty was undeniable. But he was a big teaser at you and your siblings but his sister smacked some sense into him.
He would leave flirty remarks, "Looking good Y/N." When you would swim or, "How's my favorite forest girly doing." He would say or your personal favorite, "Pretty girl." and you would just reply kindly, with a "Thank you Ao'nung." Or a small, "I am fine how are you." and that just wrapped him into your love spell deeper.
Then he started to help you with things, even when you didn't need it. He just wanted a reason to be close with you. You thought he was just being helpful, but sometimes you couldn't help but get butterflies in your stomach when his hand would graze yours when lifting something into the docks, or when he addressed you as pretty girl and it drove you insane.
And now he here he was looking at his reflection making sure his hair was right before he went to talk to your father, Jake Sully. The Toruk Makto. Hell yeah he was scared but it would all be worth it. He walked into your families mauri only Jake was there sharpening his dagger. Ao'nung gulped a wad of saliva. His palms were sweaty and sweat threatened to spill all over his body.
He took a deep breath composing himself. "Hello Jake." Ao'nung spoke bringing his fingers from his forehead outward towards Jake as a sign of respect. "Ao'nung." Jake spoke suspiciously. "If you are looking for any of my kids I do not know except Y/N she's out collecting pearls for her little sister." He said sighing afterwards.
"No sir I just came to ask you something important." Ao'nung said Jake stood up at the seriousness in the younger males voice. "Yes of course what is it." Jake said. "I would like to ask for your blessing to court your daughter." Ao'nung spoke quickly and swiftly. And it seemed all the color drained from Jake's face. "M-my d-daughter Kiri?!?" Jake said running his hands over his face distraught. "No! Not Kiri, Y/N." Ao'nung corrected the male.
Jake turns to him, protective dad overload. And just before he could speak you walked in. "Hello fathe- Ao'nung, hey." You say indigo painting your face as Ao'nung says hello doing the forehead motion to you as he did to Jake, but Jake could tell he was flirting, right in front of him!
Jake looks at the interaction dread filling him. "What are you doing here?" You ask softly putting a bag filled with pearls down looking at him. "Oh I was just asking your father," Ao'nung took a deep breath once again before telling him he was asking for your father blessing. "His blessing to court you." He said turning back to his father.
A sense of excitement and happiness could be felt anyone in a ten foot radius of you. You looked at your father huge smile plastered on your face shaking your head up and down, yes. Your father took one deep breath and closed his eyes before he spoke, "Yes, you have my blessing." Jake said and Ao'nung turned to you and gave you a smile just as big as yours. "But," your dad said making you turn your attention to him. "You don't go anywhere alone I was a teenager not long ago I know what's going through that pea sized brain and I am not, repeat not having a baby under this roof, so help me god I will kill yo-" "Dad!" You yell stopping the threats being thrown at a shocked Ao'nung.
Oh and, when your brothers found out you were being courted all hell broke loose. "How could you let my baby sister be courted but that fish boy!" Neteyam spoke. "I am not a baby." You say as you finish separating fruits as your mother instructed you to. "I refuse to be brothers with that fish." Lo'ak said shaking his head. "I'm not happy about it either but if he makes her happy then let it be." Your father said to them. "Oh you are acting like children." You say throwing a price of fruit at your father.
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scoobydoodean · 5 months
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what is your opinion on people calling dean a heavy misogynist? i don’t agree personally but i feel like you could put my thoughts into better words
First, I have to chuckle a little at "heavy misogynist". Apparently, some people have begun to realize their fave is also guilty of misogyny crimes therefore they focus on making sure all of us know Sam is a light misogynist and Dean is a heavy misogynist. I just find that amusing.
This is a broad topic in a long show, so I won't endeavor to address every conceivable incidence of misogyny in the show I can think of. Instead, I'm going to create a few headings, at least one of which I think most criticism falls under.
Misogyny through the writing team
How Sam's misogyny gets a pass
Purity culture wank and Dean performing for Sam
How Dean actually treats women
Misogyny Through The Writing Team
First, Supernatural in of itself has issues with misogyny—as in, the writers of the show (including female writers) have issues with misogyny which they are happy to put on display semi-frequently. The show started in 2005, during a period of time where casual sexism was absolutely rampant on TV and no one thought anything about it. Female celebrities were regularly mocked and dragged on cable television in a way men simply weren't. They were called bitches and skanks and whores, and even "progressive" voices were inundated with casual misogyny and a fixation on purity culture (that largely applied to women only). Quite simply, I think fandom tends to be far too generous toward the writers, assuming certain things were "flaws" the writers intentionally wrote for the characters.
Put another way, there are some criticisms I prefer to level at the writing team rather than the characters, because what is written plainly reflects their ignorance in the real world rather than any intent to give Sam or Dean or any other character meaningful flaws—much less outright terrible ones that greatly harm their image. I'll give a few examples:
2.17 "Heart" makes me very uncomfortable as I sit here in 2024 and observe how Sam and Madison's romance develops. Me feeling that way does not mean the authorial intent of 2007 Sera Gamble was that I think to myself, "Man Sam comes off as uncomfortably rapey here." Hopelessly bad with women, perhaps—but not creepy.
In season 2, the writers begin to develop a running “joke” that Sam is afraid of not just clowns but also little people. The latter “joke” is (wisely) dropped fairly quickly. I have never criticized Sam for being afraid of little people, and I never will. It is readily apparent to me that this running "joke" reflects the ignorance of the writing team rather than an intent to give Sam meaningful or interesting flaws. Their intent was to use little people as the butt of a joke. I personally find this "joke" distasteful, and the idea of trying to take that and somehow "dunk" on Sam for the bigotry of the writers is more distasteful to me.
This is also how I feel about the running "joke" of a porn magazine and website (BAB) that solely features Asian women, that is put on display on multiple occasions during the show—first in 2.15 "Tall Tales", where the context is Gabriel infecting Sam's laptop with a virus from the website and making him believe Dean is responsible. BAB continues to make "Easter Egg" appearances in the show afterward. While often associated with Dean by fandom, the writers clearly think of BAB as a general, "funny" (it isn't), running gag with no more depth than "haha men like porn funny". An issue is stolen by a sentient teddy bear in 4.08 "Wishful Thinking". An issue is owned by the teenager who swapped bodies with Sam in 5.12 "Swap Meat". The Men of Letters also collected a considerable number of issues (8.17). I simply do not believe the writers thought for a single moment about BAB being a grossly racist gag. They most certainly did not write it as an intentional criticism of Dean from that perspective. It reflects nothing but their ignorance and racism here in the real world, and absolutely SHOULD be criticized from that REAL WORLD impact.
How Sam's misogyny largely gets a pass
One of the things I have not been able to stop noticing on this rewatch is Sam's issues with misogyny, and how often Sam's misogyny comes out in conflicts with Dean... starting from the very first episode of the show. Pretty much any time you get anything that feels like it might be a misogynist Dean or horn dog Dean moment... Sam either just has or is about to follow that up with some misogyny of his own.
In 1.01, right after entering Sam's apartment and meeting Jess, Dean mentions the Smurfs on Jess's shirt. We think to ourselves "Okay. A little misogynist... a little horn-dog Dean." Sam is happy to 1-Up that in two ways. First, Jess voices her intentions to go get dressed. Dean dismisses this, but while doing so, makes it clear he intends to leave the room with Sam, as he'd like to have a private conversation with Sam anyway. Sam objects, walking over to Jess and putting an arm around her, demanding Dean say whatever he needs to say right then and there. Maybe this would feel supportive if Jess wasn't in her underwear and hadn't just made it clear that now that the panic over a possible break-in is over, she'd really like to not be in her underwear in front of a stranger. But nope. By god she needs to stand there so Sam can prove a point about misogynist Dean! Second, Sam immediately (and I think quite erroneously) jumps to imply Dean is trying to cut Jess out of the conversation because she's... a woman? Or... something? He makes a big show of moving over Jess and standing beside her, saying anything Dean has to say, he can say in front of Jess. However, the moment Sam actually understands that Dean is here because John is missing on a hunting trip, he dismisses Jess to speak to Dean alone... because he's lying to her. By painting Dean erroneously with this "The men are talking" bullshit that had nothing to do with anything, Sam sets himself up to be viewed as a misogynist by his own framing of the situation and what it means to leave Jess out of a discussion. He also reveals his own alleged principles as a performative illusion. Despite being his intended life partner, Sam never intends to tell the woman he loves about his past as a hunter (he makes this clear later on the bridge). However, I think because Sam's actions usually co-occur with what gets called out more directly or more immediately recognized as misogyny from Dean (should have gotten him for the Smurf's comment, Sam!) Sam's misogyny often flies under the radar... and he's really... pretty bad.
I spoke here at length about how Sam tends to look down on women who interact with Dean (often before meeting them). There is absolutely an intersection with purity culture here and there's discussion in that thread about that as well, and whether this is a "2000s writers" issue or intentionally written flaws.
In 1.06, Sam cuts Dean off before Dean can accept an offered beer from Rebecca, but then as soon as Sam needs Rebecca out of the room, Sam asks her to not just bring them those beers... but also fix them sandwiches. Rebecca says, "What do you think this is, Hooters?" and Dean mumbles, "I wish" and we somehow lose sight of the fact that Sam literally just asked a woman to make him sandwiches which is possibly the number one misogynist man trope. Sam vaguely suggests Dean is a misogynist in 1.19 for nudging Sam to go on a date with Sarah Blake and possibly get information on the case, because that would be "using" her, but Sam wants to "use" Meg Masters in 1.22 and he wants to "use" Ruby to get what he wants, and when he said getting information from women was "Dean's job", he was also showing he was perfectly willing to use Dean and Sarah—he just doesn't want to get his hands dirty. It also comes to light in 1.19 that this is more about Sam's belief that he has to protect women from him, and Sarah herself ends up calling Sam antiquated for it.
I mentioned before that Sam doesn't plan to ever tell Jess who he is, and he makes the same plans with Amelia. Dean, meanwhile, confides in Cassie (it's what leads to their breakup) as well as Lisa.
I also have to mention... one of the funniest things I see deancrit samgirls in particular dig at time after time after time is Dean calling women "bitches". Never mind that Sam also calls women like Ruby and Bela bitches and calls a woman a bitch in front of Madison. Apparently none of these occurrences count because... *looks at notes* reasons. "Bitch" only counts as misogyny when it's Dean saying it. Also, let's not mention that Sam exclusively uses the word "bitch" to refer to women, while Dean also calls men and creatures bitches at different points so it isn't a gender specific insult for him.
Dean is definitely the "heavy" misogynist here... right? (I guess Sam is a "tall" misogynist instead).
Purity culture wank and Dean performing for Sam
Dean is commonly treated in fandom as if he's some kind of sex pest, and quite blatantly... he isn't one. Women almost always proposition Dean first (thejabberwock has sets on this here and here), but him asking people out also isn't inherently creepy in any way? Co-occurring with Sam's purity culture inundated judgements, we often see fandom's own as well, where Dean is some kind of sex pest because he... likes women? Or... because he has sex with consenting women who also want to have sex with him? Sometimes it's giving purity culture wank, sometimes it's given big radfem energy... but regardless, I sometimes see people talk about Dean like him so much as making eye contact with a woman is a violent sexual threat, and that's just laughable—as is denying the agency and autonomy of consenting women in general.
Even though it doesn’t matter in the grand scheme of things, I'll also add that Dean... doesn't even actually have sex with the frequency that people talk about it? Dean has sex with Cassie—who was a long term partner of his in 1.13. He has sex with an actress in 2.18, and with Doublemint twins in 3.01. He has sex with a waitress 4.05. He plans to have sex with someone in 3.04, but turns her down when he realizes she's a prostitute who's working. This happens again in 10.07. I'm on season 4 of my rewatch and haven't been formally keeping up... but Dean is not actually having a lot of sex? We get implications he's been out partying a few times, and can maybe infer he scored, but we don't actually know.
I'm not a huge fan of performing Dean, in the sense that I think over the years I have seen it wildly overstated far too many times. But I do think Dean sometimes plays a character for Sam especially. Dean tells us this himself in 2.03 "Bloodlust" when confiding in Gordon. He never says so directly when it comes to the sexy sex guy doing sex persona, but his actions reveal him. One can think of plenty of examples of Dean saying horny stuff about women to Sam... but what about his actions?
How Dean actually treats women
Finally, there's how Dean actually treats women... and one would be very hard pressed to prove to me that Dean is sexist toward the women in his life. He's been close friends with multiple women and worked with women on hunts on multiple occasions and never once batted an eye. Jo in 2.06 is sometimes floated as an example, but it's actually discussed within the episode. Dean makes it very clear that he thinks women can do the job just fine. What he has a problem with is Jo's lack of experience and her romanticization of the job (especially during a period where Dean has fallen deeply out of love with the job himself). Everything we see as the series progresses supports Dean's assertion as truth. He's very good friends with Charlie, Jody, and Donna and doesn't go around excluding them on hunts while favoring men. That is not a thing that happens. While he initially tries to talk Claire out of the life (as he does everybody—this is not unique to women—see Adam for example) when she decides to hunt, he supports her regardless. There is nothing uniquely overprotective about how Dean treats women who hunt. End of. Dean has no illusions about traditional gender roles or any of that nonsense, jumping to clean dishes after dinner at Jody's and cooking breakfast for Lisa and Ben. (Our knowledge of Dean and the chores he does for his family already tell us this—but regardless). Even Demon Dean, an entity with no love for anyone and close to zero principles, targeted men who abuse and threaten women, and when Crowley ordered him to kill Lester's wife to fulfill the terms of Lester's demon deal, Demon Dean instead became so deeply annoyed with Lester's hypocrisy (he cheated on his wife first) and his assertion that it's different when men cheat, that he killed him and smiled while doing it.
So anyway, nope—I don't think Dean is a "heavy" misogynist.
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watchmegetobsessed · 11 months
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“Who’s is it”
JUST HANDS
WORD COUNT: 1.9k
WARNING: sexual content
SUMMARY: Harry, your college best friend has offered to help you move, but neither of you expected him to find your dildo in the midst of packing. And you especially not expected what came afterwards.
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You know you’re fucked the moment you see Harry grab the blue shoebox from under the bed, but it doesn’t process until he opens the lid and pulls out your trusty purple dildo.
This was not on your bingo card. Your best friend holding your beloved cock replacement that has gotten you through so many droughts and heartbreaks when you couldn’t even bear to look at a man.
Now that dildo is being held up by Harry and you feel like you’re about to scream and burn the apartment down. 
“Um, whose is it?” Harry manages to ask, his cheeks turning cherry red, but he is still holding up the fucking dildo.
Once your muscles are over the shock and you finally force yourself to move you step to him over the plenty of boxes and bags on the floor and grab the dildo from him before shoving it into one of the bags.
“Who do you think it belongs to, idiot?” you snap, the heat that’s crawling up your neck is dizzying. “We’re packing up my bedroom, whose fucking dildo would it be?”
Harry clears his throat and just stands there for a couple of moments while you busy yourself with emptying the dresser. But maybe it wasn’t the best idea, because now Harry is watching you throw your thongs and all kinds of underwear into a bag, making it even more awkward.
This is not how you imagine this afternoon when you asked Harry to help you pack up your room. You’ve been living here for the past two years, sharing the apartment with two other girls, but you finally found a nice studio apartment for your senior year of college, so you’re moving now. Harry has been a huge help so far, but right now you wish you never asked him to come over.
Minutes pass by and he is still just standing there, staring at you and it’s now pissing you off.
“What?” you snap with a sigh as you finally dare to look up.
You’ve known Harry since the first day of college. He spilled his green juice on your right before your first ever lecture and then switched shirts with you just so you could make a good impression on the professor. So you sat in an oversized, simple black shirt while Harry sported a sheer white blouse with a big green stain on it, ignoring every curious eyes that turned to him.
You’ve been best friends since then, but you’ve never seen him look at you the way he is looking at you right now. Pupils dilated, the friendly green of his irises has disappeared, his pink lips are parted and there’s something new in his posture as well, but you just can’t put your finger on it.
And it’s making you sweat.
“Uh, n-nothing,” he shakes his head, breaking the eye contact at last. “It’s nothing.”
“Then let’s just move on, alright?”
He only hums as he grabs a box from the floor and gets back to work. But it’s not the same. You can feel the tension as you silently pack next to each other and you catch Harry staring at either you or the bag you shoved the dildo into. When some time has passed and you’ve passed by the embarrassment you finally work up the courage to address the situation, hoping to ease the suffocating tension.
“Um, sorry about… the… I forgot about it and didn’t think you’d find it.”
Harry looks up at you from the pile of shoes he’s been placing in a box, he looks like a deer caught in the headlights for a brief second before a smirk tugs on his lips.
“Forgot about it? So you haven’t used it lately?”
“That’s not… that’s not what I mean. I did use it recently–” 
Did you really just admit to masturbating to him? With your purple dildo? For fuck’s sake, this is getting worse by the minute.
“I-I mean, uhh–”
“I know what you meant,” he chuckles, looking down at the shoes as he shakes his head, but you notice his ears have turned red. “It’s just… never mind.”
“What?”
“Nothing, let’s just move on.”
“No, tell me! I wanna know what you wanted to say.”
Sighing he drops the pair of tennis shoes from his hands and looks up at you.
“I just never thought you’re the kind to use… help, like toys.”
You blink at him.
“What’s that supposed to mean?”
Your thoughts are racing a million miles per second, trying to process his words. He never thought you were the kind to use toys? You’re not ballsy or freaky enough to use a dildo? Does he think you’re too prude for sex toys? And most importantly, has he actually been thinking about your ways of masturbating?
Harry shrugs as he stands, hands on his hips. 
“It’s just that I always thought you either get a hook up or just use your hands.”
“Why? You think I’m too prude to use toys?”
“That’s not what I said,” he chuckles, but you’re not done pouring questions at him.
“And do you often ponder about how I usually masturbate? Because you seem to be having a very strong opinion about the topic.”
“What?” Now his face has gone blank and you can sense his discomfort.
“Just so you know, I very much love to use that dildo and I’m also a fan of rabbit vibrators, I used to have one, but I dropped it and it broke and haven’t gotten a new one.”
Harry’s eyebrows rise and you swallow hard as you realize just how much you gave away about your private life. Neither of you speaks and then you both just sort of go back to packing without acknowledging the things said, but you can’t stop thinking about it.
This might not feel like this big of a deal if you haven’t been crazily into Harry these past months. You have no idea when your feelings shifted from friendly to “I want him to fuck me in the school cafeteria”, but it’s been messing with your head. Your dirty dreams about him don’t help your case either. 
Just as you recite his words probably for the millionth time he breaks the silence.
“I do, by the way.”
“Huh?” you ask with a dumb frown.
“I do think about how you pleasure yourself. Pretty often. Mostly when I’m wanking.”
Your mouth drops open and whatever was in your hand now drops to the floor as you stare back at him. He is holding your gaze smugly, as if he is challenging you to react and make the next move.
The ball is in your court.
Your chest is rising and falling rapidly as you’re trying to wrap your head around where this conversation has gotten to and you make a decision within a second.
“Do you want to actually watch me touch myself?”
The words sound distant, but you know you said them. And you watch Harry’s eyes turn darker than ever as he slowly nods.
“Yeah.”
Your desires take over your actions, rationality has been thrown out the window as you walk over to him and take his hand, pulling him over to the dresser that’s facing the bed. 
“Stand here,” you tell him as you position him against the dresser and then you climb onto your bed, making yourself comfortable in the middle, opening your legs so Harry has an excellent view of the way you run your hand over yourself, only your tiny cotton shorts covering your pussy from his greedy eyes.
“I could use the dildo, or just my hands. What do you want, Harry?” you question, while you keep rubbing yourself over the fabric of your shorts and there’s probably a wet stain already showing through it.
“Hands,” he answers eagerly. “Just hands.”
Lifting your hips you push down your shorts and underwear, over your knees and then kick them to the side before opening your legs again, this time exposing your naked cunt in front of Harry.
When you hear a shaky moan from him you lick two of your fingers before reaching down and keeping eye contact with him you start circling them on your clit the way you like it.
“You like it?” You ask, words turning into a moan when you hit the right spot.
“Yes,” he breathes out and as your gaze drops to his crotch you notice just how much he is enjoying the show. The outline of his cock is teasing you from across the room and though part of you wants him to fuck you until you forget your own name, you’re also enjoying this little game you’re playing and you want to finish it.
“What else do you want me to do, Harry?”
This time he needs a few seconds before he can answer.
“Finger yourself.”
“Want to see my fingers fucking my pussy?”
“Yes,” he nods eagerly and you see his hand twitching, but he doesn’t touch himself, instead, he looks you in the eyes and asks: “Can I touch myself too?”
Fuck, you love this obedient side of him, love that you feel in charge of him.
“Yes. I wanna see you play with yourself while I fuck myself.”
Harry groans as he rushes to undo the button and zipper of his pants and tug them down halfway on his thighs, just enough to let his hard cock finally spring free. Your mouth waters and you whimper as you push two fingers inside you, pretending like it’s his cock that’s filling you up, though you know it will be a whole different feeling when his dick finally pushes into you.
Leaning against the dresser he is jerking himself off while watching you edge yourself closer to your orgasm. Curling your fingers, pushing, pressing and pinching, you already know you won’t last much longer, not when you’re staring at Harry’s throbbing cock.
“Are you close?” you ask, gasping for air, your back arching from the mattress.
“Yes, fuck, I’m gonna come,” he hisses, his eyes glued to you. 
“Come with me, Harry!” you whine and he nods, his hand going even faster now.
You stare at each other the moment you both reach your climax. Your legs are shaking and you can’t quiet yourself while you watch Harry’s cum squirt onto the floor in waves, he gasps for air and calls out your name like a plea.
Minutes pass by and the two of you remain in your own respective spots, trying to catch your breath and return to reality. When it finally happens you sit up and you’re met with Harry’s eyes already resting on you. For a moment you have no idea what’s gonna happen, but then you both suddenly start to laugh. 
“That was… unexpected,” he admits, lazily pulling his pants back up as you scoot to the edge of the mattress. Harry walks over to you and helps you up from the bed. Now you’re looking at each other from up close.
“But did you enjoy it?” you ask with a sheepish smile.
“The proof that I enjoyed it is on the floor now,” he chuckles and it makes you laugh as well.
“Maybe… next time we could be closer to each other. Even touch each other,” you muse.
Harry smirks as he takes your chin between his thumb and index finger before running his thumb across your lower lip.
“I would love that.”
Thank you for reading, please like and reblog if you enjoyed and buy me a coffee if you want to support me!
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starlazergazer · 9 months
Text
Couldn't Get Rid of Me if You Tried
Pairing: Anakin x Reader
Request(s): Reader has a nightmare and Anakin stays with her / Reader can’t sleep so Anakin stays by her side / Reader hasn’t slept in a few days and Anakin notices and makes the reader go to bed, not leaving until they fall asleep
Warnings: Swearing, nightmares
Word Count: 4.9K
A/N: Long overdue but I finally finished writing something! This is a mash up of a few different requests I thought would work well together so let me know what you think!
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Anakin fixed his robes for what felt like the tenth time in the last ten minutes, part of him chastising himself for being this anxious over nothing but a bigger part of him worried that they weren’t laying properly, or that his hair was sticking up in a weird direction, or that there was something stuck in his teeth.
Not that you would ever judge him for any of that of course. In fact, he already knew exactly what you would do. You would fix whatever it was yourself, an amused giggle slipping out as you approached to rake your hands through his hair attempting to tame every stray piece until you were satisfied, a light smile never dropping from your face throughout the process.
Another part of him considered messing up something on purpose just so he could see that smile.
But no that was a bit ridiculous even for him. You were expected to land any minute now and spend the next week in meetings preparing to address the senate, and Anakin was to be your guard for the entire time. He’d have plenty of time to earn your smile, hopefully without needing to embarrass himself.
The sound of the door opening snapped him out of his thoughts. Anakin quickly jumping to his feet, holding his hands rigidly in front of him and taking a deep breath.
A loud voice sounded before he saw anyone, a list of meetings and notes being rattled off by one of your aids loudly as in strolled your own personal security guard, the man immediately noticing Anakin and giving him a small nod before scanning the room, you following in close behind him.
Anakin couldn’t help but grin as you entered the room, your attention completely absorbed by the datapad you held in your hand, eyes skimming across the screen rapidly as you read, offering small hums of acknowledgment as your aide continued to rattle off messages.
You walked right by without even noticing, going on autopilot to your desk and setting the pad down, not sitting yourself but rather standing over it, stretching your legs as you continued to read. Anakin couldn’t help but chuckle under his breath at the sight, vividly remembering your conversation with him after your last flight into Coruscant about how the long flight made your legs ache, you refusing to sit for as long as possible afterwards in an attempt to get blood flowing back to your toes.
“Allana has senator-“ and finally your gaze rose from the pad, instinctively heading towards your aide’s form but snapping to Anakin the minute you realized there was another person in the room, brows furrowed for a moment before you recognized him “An- uh jedi Skywalker?”
His lips ticked up at the near slipup, giving you a small bow “senator it’s nice to see you”
“It’s nice to see you too” and the confused expression returned to your face, eyes snapping to your guard then aide for a moment before returning “Is there something I can help you with?”
It was now Anakin’s turn to wear the confused expression “I was under the assumption that you had requested extra protection for your speech”
Your eyes snapped to your bodyguard, raising an eyebrow “Did we request extra protection?”
“We did” he nodded, pausing a brief second before continuing hesitantly “I figured it could be beneficial after what happened last time”
He could hear your sigh from across the room as your gaze snapped back to the datapad, quickly resuming your reading only making Anakin more confused.
“What happened last time?”
Your gaze snapped up to your guard, a silent threat sent across the room before your gaze connected with his, a smile painted on your lips that didn’t reach your eyes “nothing”
Anakin was already turning to Dex, your guard, a million questions on the tip of his tongue. He hadn’t been on Coruscant the last time you had made the trip out but he hadn’t heard of anything happening. What were you keeping from him? Instead of being able to ask, however, Allana spoke up, her voice slightly higher than usual as she sought to cut the tension in the air.
“Senator you’re needed at-“
You didn’t even let her finish, grabbing your datapad off the table and waving her off “of course senator Elan’s meeting thank you Allana” and without even looking back at him you were headed back out the door, your entourage filing out behind you leaving Anakin to bring up the rear, trying to edge off his disappointment from your much too quick welcome.
-
You were back at your desk, the same place you had been all day if not in a meeting, typing away furiously at your speech before you, not taking notice of Anakin’s approach until he set the glass down before you.
He’d made you your favorite, the same one you always had whenever you came to Coruscant, usually shared with Anakin while the two of you talked before bed. He always missed those talks, one of the few times he felt like he could really talk about himself not in relation to the jedi order, one of the few times he got to actually hear from you, not the senator.
You smiled up at him as he set it down and Anakin felt a warmth spread through his chest at that look, feeling that finally you were looking at him for the first time all day, not the curious jedi showing up in your room or the hired guard standing off in the corner, just a friend who made you a drink. “Thanks Ani”
And oh how he missed hearing that nickname from you, a grin creeping on his lips as he clinked his own glass softly against yours, rising it to his lips in an attempt to hide it as he sat down in one of the chairs before your desk, settling in as you went back to typing, finishing out a few more words before finally taking the glass.
“Where’s Dex?”
You shrugged back at him, eyes casting back to your screen as you read over whatever you had written “I told him he could go to bed, you’re up to guard me”
He nodded back at your answer, taking another sip of his drink before responding “It is rather late are you heading to bed soon yourself?”
He watched your eyes jump to the nearest clock, eyebrows jumping up slightly as you read the time, an exhausted sigh escaping as you rubbed a hand over your face “Today went by much too quickly”
He chuckled softly at you as you shut down your system, picking up your glass as you walked down around your desk to sit in the chair next to him, angling your body to face him “I guess time flies when you’re having fun” he offered.
You laughed at that, shaking your head softly “oh is that what this is?”
A comfortable silence fell over the two of you and Anakin always loved how he never felt the need to fill silences like this when they came up between the two of you, more than happy to just sit in your company.
“How’s Obi-wan doing?” You asked him, a small smile growing on Anakin’s face.
“He’s good, he’s off world on an assignment right now”
“You’re not with him?”
“No there’s this senator who requested extra protection for this speech she’s giving” he responded innocently “extra protection her team requested due to some incident she stupidly won’t tell me about”
You hummed back in response and Anakin couldn’t help but notice the way you seemed to struggle to keep your eyes open, your posture completely slumped over in your chair as you used it to support your head “maybe this senator has a very good reason for that”
“I doubt it” he responded with a soft shake of his head “maybe this senator should go get some sleep before she falls asleep in her office chair”
That seemed to snap you back to attention, your posture pushing you back up slightly as you made extra effort to make eye contact with him, groaning slightly as you did so “no I’m okay”
“oh yeah you look it” he hummed back with a smirk, pushing himself to his feet and offering you his hand.
“No come on talk to me. I haven’t gotten to talk to you in months I miss it” and he felt his heartstrings tug at your words, his smirk growing into a softer smile as he chuckled slightly.
“Then it’s a good thing you’ve got me for a whole week” he mused “but right now you look like you need sleep badly so come on”
With a small roll of your eyes you took his hand, letting him pull you to your feet. And he tried to ignore the fact that he had stood too close to your feet when he pulled you up, tried to pretend it hadn’t been his intention when your body was nearly pressed against his once you were standing, tried to disregard the way his body seemed to hum from the close contact before he stepped aside and slipped a soft hand to the small of your back to usher you forward.
“You know I think I can find my way back to my room from here” the amusement in your voice telling him that you didn’t mind.
“The council tasked me with protecting you this week and I’ll have you know I take my job very seriously” he told you, the mock sincerity in his own tone making you laugh, his heart swelling within his chest at the sound.
“I’ll be sure to leave you a glowing review with the council then, five stars for jedi Skywalker” you slowed outside your door, pushing it open but spinning around to lean against the doorway and face him, Anakin relishing the soft smile that graced your lips as you looked up at him.
“I certainly hope that your scale is out of five stars” he practically hummed the words, taking a cautious step closer to you eagerly noting the way the corners of your mouth lifted even higher as he did so.
“oooh unfortunately my scale is out of ten stars” you scrunched up your face in a grimace, a small shake to your head as your eyes bounced back and forth between his own “you lost some back there when you made me go to bed instead of staying to talk to me”
“It’s a good thing I have all week to earn them back then” he mused with a smirk, leaning softly forward.
And by this point it would be so easy, so easy to lean down and close the distance, so easy to capture your lips into his own, so easy to pull you by the waist against his chest, so so easy….so so over the line.
He halted his movements the second the thought occurred to him, the realization that any push forward would be without a doubt crossing a line. And he wasn’t just talking about the jedi’s line, he could reconcile with disobeying the code, but this would be crossing your own as well. He was your hired guard, a man whose sole responsibility it was to protect you, surely you wouldn’t want someone like that acting the way he so desperately wanted to, crossing that professionalism boundary.
It'd been quiet for too long, Anakin too in his own head to realize it until it was too late, until your smile started to slowly slip off your lips, a ghost of one remaining as you spoke, soft and sweet “Goodnight Ani”
And he tried to ignore the effect that nickname had on him as he forced himself to take a step back, giving you a small nod “goodnight senator”
“Y/N” the correction came quickly.
And he would pretend that he hadn’t done it on purpose, used your title instead of your name just so that you would correct him, assert in this moment at least that your relationship went beyond just senator and jedi guard. He would pretend that right now that was enough.
“Goodnight Y/N”
-
Anakin struggled to sleep that night, not that that was unexpected after what he had nearly done in your doorway, so it was no surprise that he was up early and dragging himself towards the dinning room of your apartment before the sun had even a chance to rise.
What was surprising was to see you already at the table, a piece of toast in one hand, a document you were reading over in the other.
“You’re already up?” he didn’t bother to disguise the shock in his voice, his brows furrowing at the sight.
“Had some work to get done” you shrugged, not taking your eyes off the document “figured I’d get an early start”
Slowly he made his way around the table to the chair beside you, his eyes never leaving your figure as he tried to piece out what information it felt like he was missing, his gaze quickly catching the dark bags under your eyes and the slow lethargic blinks you were giving the paper “how long have you been up?”
“Not long” another shrug, another avoidance.
“You look like you’re on the brink of collapsing” he pushed a teasing tone into his voice, hoping making light of the situation would get you to drop whatever guard you still had up “you don’t have any meetings for another few hours why don’t you go back to sleep for a little longer”
Finally you turned your head to look at him, Anakin easily seeing through your every attempt to appear more awake, the way your posture straightened, the way your gaze widened slightly, the small uptick in one side of your mouth as you forced a smile, a façade created solely for his benefit “I’m okay Ani”
“And you’d tell me if you weren’t?” he asked skeptically.
This got an amused snort out of you as you turned back to your work, a more real smile gracing your lips “probably not”
And for now he decided to drop it, to let you have whatever secret you were keeping from him, to let you have one sleepless night “next time I’m asking for a less stubborn senator”
You laughed at that, a fond shake of your head as you glanced over at him “nice try I know I’m your favorite”
You have no idea.
-
He found you in the same place as the night before, your head propped up lazily on your fist as you stared down at the page before you on the desk, your other hand slowly taking notes with movements that were far too large and far too lazy to be anything legible. “Senator we have got to stop meeting like this” he teased from the doorway, a brief flick up of your eyes the only sign that you had heard him “you behind your desk nearly falling asleep in the chair, me walking in telling you to go to bed. Feels awfully familiar”
“Y/N” your soft voice quietly protested; your head still propped in the same position as you ignored the rest of his sentence.
“Y/N let’s go to bed” He dropped his voice to a low, calm pitch, stepping into the room and up to your desk, watching you slowly push yourself into a more upright position.
“No I need to finish this” you objected with a sigh, digging the heels of your hands into your eyes as you stretched in your chair.
He couldn’t help but chuckle fondly at the movement, his eyes darting down to the page you were taking notes on “sweetheart your notes aren’t even legible.”
Your head snapped down to the page as well, taking in what looked like nothing more than a series of random loops that were supposed to be your notes “shit”
“yeah” he chuckled softly, head nodding to behind him as he spoke “come on you can do it in the morning.”
“No I need to-“ objections poured out of your mouth again but Anakin barely heard them as he made his way around your desk to crouch down next to you, your voice halting once Anakin placed the crook of his finger beneath your chin, pulling your gaze to him.
“When was the last time you slept?” he asked softly, taking in the way every feature of yours screamed of exhaustion “and don’t say last night I know that’s a lie”
You let out a sigh at that, pulling your face back from his grasp “I mean I did sleep some last night”
“When was the last time you slept more than an hour?” he countered.
That question silenced you, your gaze fixed on the work in front of you, your voice so soft when you finally did answer Anakin had to strain to hear it “I don’t know”
“Exactly” he sighed, reaching down to grab one of your wrists, giving it a small tug “come on you need to sleep.”
“I don’t want to sleep” and he knew it wasn’t just because of work, but he wasn’t going to push, not yet.
“Okay, you said last night you wanted to talk what if we did that instead?”
Your head rose to meet his gaze slowly, your brows furrowed slightly as you looked up at him skeptically “yeah?”
“Yeah” he nodded with a smirk “but only If you’re laying down in bed”
You groaned at that, your body slumping forward so that your forehead hit your desk.
“Come on” he laughed, using a hand on your shoulder to pull you back up to sitting position, giving it a soft squeeze before reluctantly removing it “you don’t want to sleep? Fine, but at least lay down. A compromise” he tried to convince you with a small chuckle “and here I thought you’d be proud of my negotiating abilities as a senator and all.”
That finally earned him a laugh, then another groan as you pushed yourself to your feet “can’t believe you’re using this power for evil.”
“If you weren’t so stubborn I wouldn’t have to” he hummed back softly, leading you down the hallway and to your room, giving you a chance to change and brush your teeth before ushering you to your bed and taking a seat on the ground beside it.
“You know it’s a big bed” you offered softly, sleep already pulling your voice down to a near mumble “you can sit up here.”
“I’m good right here” he responded softly as he leaned his back against your mattress, his position putting him mere inches from your resting form above.
A hand was cast carefully down over the edge of the mattress and before Anakin could think otherwise he reached up and tangled his fingers with yours, choosing to believe you offered it to him by doing so, accepting that perhaps it was just the position you liked to sleep in even as you hummed happily from above him as he rubbed the pad of his thumb lazily back and forth on your finger.
“Can we talk yet?” your voice was muffled from your position on the mattress, but Anakin didn’t complain, keeping up the rhythmic motions of his thumb as he responded in a soft voice barely above a whisper.
“What do you want to talk about sweetheart?”
“Tell me about your last mission” you supplied immediately a smile rising on Anakin’s face as he started to tell the story, barely paying attention to his own words as he instead focused on the sound of your breathing, waiting until it started to slow and deepen.
He stopped talking once it did, his thumb slowing to a halt only after he made sure you hadn’t noticed the silence, only then daring to press a soft kiss to your knuckles before pushing himself to his feet and out the door. A soft “goodnight Y/N” whispered from the doorway before he shut the door behind him.
-
Not long after Anakin had fallen asleep a disturbance in the force was dragging him back to consciousness. It took a few seconds to orient himself as he sat up in bed, part of his brain trying to take in his surroundings while the other part was screaming that something was wrong.
His body reacted before his mind did, his feet were on the ground and pulling him towards you before anything else, his only instinct being to get to you.
Saber hilt in hand he threw open your bedroom door, eyes rapidly scanning the empty room before falling on your sleeping form as your head whipped back and forth, soft whimpers falling from your lips as your legs tangled up in the sheets.
With a small sigh in relief Anakin set his saber down on your bedside table before making his way over to you, a hand coming to your shoulder to give your body a small shake.
Your eyes shot open immediately, a surprised yelp escaping your lips the same moment, as one foot reared up and made contact with his torso.
A grunt left Anakin as he was pushed backwards by your kick, your form scrambling up the bed to get further away from him, loud ragged breaths coming from you as you curled up defensively in a ball as far away from him as you could.
 “Hey hey it’s okay” he tried to soothe you, one hand coming up but refusing to take a step towards you yet, giving you a moment to calm down.
Your heavy breaths were the only thing filling the silence in the room as you offered no response, your form staying tightly curled in on itself as Anakin practically begged you to answer him.
“Y/N you’re safe, it’s just me, it’s Anakin” he tried again.
Your breaths halted at his words, your form remaining unmoving, Anakin risked a step forward.
“It’s just me”
“Ani?” Your broken voice had his knees shaking, Anakin having to fight to urge to rush to you knowing that would likely just set you off again.
“Yeah that’s right it’s just me sweetheart”
Another tense silence passed between the two of you before you spoke again, your voice slightly stronger “Ani? Ani, oh god I’m so sorry-“
Anakin didn’t let you finish, taking your words to mean he was okay to approach as he closed the distance between the two of you in a few steps and scooped you up into his arms as he sat down on the bed.
You didn’t hesitate to curl up in his arms, taking the opportunity to bury your face in his chest, slow shaky breaths wracking your body as you fought more tears.
“You got nothing to apologize for sweetheart” he tried to assure you, running a hand softly through your hair as he held you tightly against himself.
Your breaths started to slowly even out as your muscles started to untense, your body slowly relaxing in his hold. Only once you had completely calmed down did Anakin speak again, burying his face in your hair “do you want to talk about it?”
You didn’t respond, something Anakin certainly didn’t blame you for, simply held you against him, rocking softly as he continued to stroke your hair.
After a few more minutes you started to shift in his arms and Anakin had to fight the instinct to hold on tighter, to not let you escape. Nonetheless he forced his arms to go slack to allow for your movement, feeling relieved when all you did was shift until your back was against his chest. Anakin eagerly wrapped his arms around your waist and pulled you against him once again, the two of you sitting in a comfortable silence.
“Last time we were here” your voice was soft enough that even from his position just behind you he struggled to hear “a man broke in and hid in my room”
Anakin’s movements stilled at that, his entire body freezing for a moment as his brain struggled to process your words.
“I just woke up and he was there at the end of my bed” you continued in an empty, hollow voice “I screamed and Dex came and took care of it. Nothing happened, nothing” and here it felt like you were trying to assure yourself more than him “but still I’ve been having nightmares about it ever since”
And as usual Anakin’s first instinct was to reach for anger, ire rising within him towards the jedi council for not telling him, towards Obi-wan who had to have known, towards Dex for letting him act as your guard without all the facts, towards himself for not having picked up on it sooner.
But as you shook slightly in his arms he knew his anger wouldn’t serve him properly here, lashing out at anyone wouldn’t fix anything, it wasn’t what you needed now.
His hold on you tightened, pulling you further into his chest as his chin sat comfortably in the crook of your neck, mumbling the question against your skin “sweetheart why didn’t you say anything?”
You sniffled, your cheek resting comfortably against his for a second before you answered “It’s stupid”
“It’s not-“ Anakin’s objection came quickly but your affirmation followed shortly, as if you had been expecting it.
“It is, he didn’t even hurt me, didn’t threaten me, just startled me and now months later I’m still too scared to sleep? It’s pathetic”
“You are far from pathetic” You could feel Anakins words against your skin as he spoke, his face lifting off your shoulder to press a kiss to the back of your head “A man broke into your room and you found him looming over you while you slept, that is objectively terrifying.”
He felt you sigh against him, the words clearly not fully sinking in.
“Besides its not entirely about what had happened, which I cannot stress enough is horrible, but rather the idea of what could have happened. Maker Y/N why are you even still in this room? You should’ve taken mine”
You were quiet for a bit, a deep breath inflating your chest against him before you responded “I thought if I stayed here I could force myself to get over it, to try and be braver than it”
He shook his head at that, unable to keep the fond smirk from growing on his lips at your answer “You’re plenty brave for even taking this apartment after last time, staying in the same room is just stupid”
That earned him a wet laugh, a few chuckles that had you relaxing slightly in his hold “Will you stay with me, please?”
The thought of leaving hadn’t even occurred to him “Sweetheart you couldn’t get rid of me if you tried”
Another small set of chuckles, your body further melding with his as you relaxed even further, exhaustion finally starting to take over.
“Except not here, come on lets go back to my room”
You shook your head at that, leaning it back against his chest “no it’s okay-“
“Please” he cut you off with a near whisper “for me please don’t force yourself to stay in this room”
Nothing but the feeling of your breaths against his chest for a few moments before a reluctant nod “yeah okay”
Anakin smiled satisfactorily at that, slowly, reluctantly releasing his hold on you to allow you to stand up, not hesitating before taking your hand and intertwining his fingers with yours, pulling you out of the room behind him before you could object.
Walking into his room Anakin didn’t hesitate to slip into one side of the bed, watching you carefully as you stood apprehensively at the edge of the bed on the other side, slow choppy movements in your limbs as you reached for the covers and carefully got into the other side, taking care to stay on your side.
But after tonight there was no more overthinking, no more worrying about crossing the line, no more talking himself out of things. You needed him and to Anakin that superseded everything.
As soon as your head hit the pillow Anakin scootched up behind you, throwing an arm around your waist and pulling you up against his chest, chuckling at the small gasp that left you at the movement.
But you didn’t pull away, your muscles tense for a moment as you adjusted before you relaxed against him, one foot coming back to tangle your legs with his own, burying yourself further into his chest as Anakin offered a content hum.
“For the record I really would have been okay with staying in my own room as long as you were there” You whispered back at him “you make me feel safe Ani”
He tightened the hold on you even more at your words, a smile so wide it hurt his cheeks overtaking his face as he buried it in your hair “alright we can try that tomorrow then”
“tomorrow?” you teased easily, any tension from the circumstances of your present predicament slowly fading from the room “awfully sure of yourself there aren’t you?”
“I told you sweetheart, you couldn’t get rid of me if you tried”
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sgiandubh · 1 month
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Show must go on...
... and rather very much in your face, mind you.
Scottish Xena posted two stories at about 7 AM, counting calories, and, in the process, making sure to address roughly any objections that were ventilated on this side of the fandom, including this very page. See for yourself...
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What are the odds she'd be talking about nutrition? Right. I am not an idiot. I know when something is way Over The Top - less is more, Xena. Less is always more: there was no need to overdo it like that, placemat and all, if you wanted to remain credible. You read us and you have been instructed to do so, just to perfectly stick to your walking, talking and very profitable Local Innuendo script.
Fair enough. And then, you also tell us that you will be at Hyrox today around noon, to film some ESN promo: your bread and butter, of course. S is just for shits, giggles and that Instagram yield:
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So, there's that. *urv connecting dots like crazy, without having the slightest clue of what was discussed at that table. Her own brand of cheap fanfic for the masses, for the other five clowns commenting, out of which three at least are her own sock accounts.
Cue in the Useful Idiot. The Brazilian Tourist and Fan. Uma senhorita tão desagradável, who changed her story in between her first reaction reel and the debrief, back at her suburban Airbnb or where the fuck that was filmed.
First reaction reels:
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'Just saw SH.' Not alone, oh no: 'com uma moça'. With a girl. So yeah, she had qualms asking for a pic.
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First lie and dramatization. She posts a message for S where she explains she did not dare approach him, but she saw him alright. The one in Portuguese is completely different, though: 'I am going to post the video without sound, because I could only say "what a shame", while I was filming him on the sly. LOL.' I guess she thinks we are all idiots, or something. Also, in her reel, she confirms: 'ele estava almoçando com outra pessoa'/he was having lunch with another person. So far, so good, right?
Six hours later, a second debrief batch of reels, taking her reader's questions. The narrative changes, with a strong bias:
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'Yes, he is super accessible and educated! I did not freak out, I just politely asked to take a pic (what I do consider the right way to approach famous people, at the end they are still human beings).'
For the people in the back: she is a lady. And a liar. The worst kind of liar, actually: a narcissistic one. Let's see what else she takes great pains telling us: 'ele tem um fandom bem tóxico'/he has a very toxic fandom. From now on, we just know what to expect, right?
Second answer, she explains he is very tall. He went inside to pay the bill and then he also went towards the bathroom (wtf?), she followed him inside, she asked for the menu, he finally went out and she approached him ('abordei' - 🙄) between the door and her table. Classy.
Cue in to a third answer (and second lie) to a very odd question: 'what did he smell like?' or something along those lines. For this one, I had to ask confirmation from Shipper Mom, who told me two things (she knew next to nothing about the whole episode- no bias): ' it's damn hard to understand what the hell she is talking about, she is eating half of her words. Plus you can tell she is lying.'
He doesn't smell, she tells us. But hey, she also freaked out a bit, finally (I thought she hadn't?!) and then well, 'ele estava com outra pessoa, uma moça, deve ser a namorada dele'/ he was with another person, a girl, probably his girlfriend'. But then he went inside (again? wasn't he coming out of the venue?), 'and the girl stayed at the table'. Things go murky afterwards, like they absolutely always do: she tells us she spoke to her (?), but would not say anything more, yet making sure to tell us she 'saw both of them'.
If anyone has a better version than mine, please step forward: we listened three times in a row, with Shipper Mom, a teacher of Portuguese and published literary translator. She was appalled by this young woman's carelessness and mendacity.
The Brazilian Tourist Fan is 23 years old (and it shows), she presents herself as a journalist and writer:
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Seriously? What are the odds?
And finally, to wrap it up, the classical cheering moment, at yesterday's Hyrox: ' yeah, Sarah, nice!'
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Nice, indeed.
FFS. Will it ever end?
Yes, it will. Anything ends: even Stalin's terror.
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stars-interlude · 4 months
Text
Poison!
a/n: I know i said a gorou fic was gonna be next but trust its in progress 🙏🏾🙏🏾 ALSO I PUT MY WHOLE HEART INTO THIS ESPECIALLY THAT TEXTING PART 😵 ALSO TYSMMM FOR THE NOTES ON THE KAZUHA FICC I rlly never thought that my work would reach that many people 😭😭 again tysm!!!
★Pairings: Leadsinger!Xiao x Fem!reader
★tags/warnings: Band!AU NSFW not proofread! smoking weed, high sex
synopsis; After your best friend Hu tao invites you to her bands concert for the first time you see her members and u see the lead singer afterwards your talking to Hu tao and he comes up to you and invites you to his place..
[💿] now playing-
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You open your eyes to see the ceiling of your dimly lit room. you sluggishly reach for your phone to see a notification from “Hu tao 🥁‼️‼️” it was something about going to a concert “i’m way too tired for this..” you mumbled. You put down your phone just to hear a knock at your door. you get up to see who it was and speak of the devil it was the one and only Hu tao “Hii.. you look like a mess if i’ve ever seen one” “Hello, how are you would’ve been just a bit better” you interject “Anyway did you see my text? It was about my bands concert.” you recall seeing her text but not really processing it “uh yea I saw it” “ well you’re coming right why aren’t you trying to plan an outfit its only in a few hours?” Your eyes widen hours you literally just woke up “hours? i got up a few minutes ago” “it’s 6pm…” Hu tao says as she walks in uninvited “i had a lot of things to do last night” you argued as you followed her. Hu tao gets to your bedroom at starts going through your closet throwing out things she thought fit the theme tonight. “no way this dress will look great on you” she says as she holds up a dark red dress. “Not bad ‘Tao I’ll wear it.”
When you get to the place where the “small concert” was you see a lot of people around your friend band while they played. As you squeezed though the crowd to get a better look you can see all the members which you’ve been introduced to some but you see the lead singer and surprisingly he’s really attractive, as your looking he looks back at you and of course you can feel your face getting hot and he makes it no better with that smirk of his face. For the rest of the few songs they played you avoided eye contact with him and just took photos and videos of the band to show to Hu tao later
Just as most people were leaving you see Hu tao running up to you “Hi, how did we do?!” “You guys did great you wanna see the photos I took while you guys played?” You can basically see the stars pop in her eyes “Of course I do, you know who you’re talking to right???” you pull out your phone to show her “we all look soo cool but why didn’t you take any pictures of Xiao?” “who’s Xiao?” you respond you’ve heard many things about Xiao but there was no way he was the lead singer “what photos of me..” you and Hu tao turn around to see just the slightly taller male.
"Hey, look who it is the man himself Xiao" Hu tao announced to you. Xiao smirked “Hey.. you’re that girl I saw when i was on stage. No photos of me? hm” He said as he moved closer to your face “uh well sorry you just weren’t my main focus” you shrugged “you were definitely mine..” Xiao muttered to himself “well here” Xiao says as he hands you a small piece of paper. Then he walked away “What’s that?” Hu tao questions “I don’t even know lemme look” you opened the paper to see a phone number with an address, you felt your face get hot “it’s nothing, nothing you need to worry about” you quickly slipped it into the pocket of a jacket you wore with the dress and you started to walk out with Hu tao
“you better not hook up with him..” Hu tao looks at you “who said I was?” you replied back “I’m just looking out for you” she says as she drops you off at your place “good night ‘Tao” you say as you open and walk into your apartment
As you walk in your place you think about what she said “not to hook up with Xiao..” you pull out your phone and begin to text him
11:37 Pm
[name] - Hey it’s Hu tao’s friend from the concert
Xiao- Well u coming to my place?
[name] - i’ll be there in a few
Xiao- kk see u
You couldn’t believe what you were getting your self into but before you could process it you were already out the door. When you finally get to his place you knocked on his door and when he opened it the smell of weed made your head go blank “heyy I didn’t think you’d actually come” Xiao said fumbling on his words. You got to his room and sat on his bed his room was surprisingly clean you thought as you saw Xiao pull something out of a jar that was in a box. It was a blunt he lit it and took a long drag “you don’t mind do you?” he looked at you “no not really..” “come here cute thing” He said as he patted his thigh implying that he wanted you to sit there. You walked over and sat
He started to kiss your neck leaving marks all over until he got to your lips “you wanna take a drag?” before he could say anything else you took the blunt and took said drag afterwards you started to cough “slow down cutie little by little” Xiao said as he finally kissed your lips. He pulled away and picked you up blunt in mouth and put you on his bed you took the blunt and took another puff and you sat up to kiss Xiao as you two kissed you could feel his hands unzipping the dress you had on. when you pulled away there was a line of spit still connecting the two of you “Xiao.. can we do it now?” He looked at you and chuckled “do what? use your words” you whined it was embarrassing asking someone for sex “fuck me Xiao..” Xiao smiled and gave you a peck on the lips just before he put out the blunt that the two of you were smoking “poor baby so needy” the two of you started to get undressed and Xiao kissed up and down your body when he got to your chest he pinched and pulled your nipples
When he felt like he’s teased you enough he took his cock out and started rubbing it against you folds “oh fuck..” He hissed in pleasure and then he suddenly thrusted in “ngh~ more please” after you said that he went faster and way deeper than you’ve expected from a guy in a band. The room full of the smell of weed and sex had you going crazy “Xiao gonna cum..” you basically squealed. your back arched off the bed it felt like you were gonna pass out then Xiao leaned down and whispered “that’s all you got, there’s a lot more to cum come”
you could tell that this will be a long night..
extra:
when you woke up after Xiao fucked your brains out you got a bunch of text from Hu tao about where you were and you knew that it would be hard to explain it to her..
a/n pt2: xiao seems a lot bolder than i expected to write him.. well I hope you guys enjoyed that it took mad long to write 😭😭
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outofgloom · 6 days
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THE TOOLS WE HAVE
He was back. The room spun, and he heard, rather than saw, the worm-like creature slough away and plop into the water of the nearby pool. Then he was very, very sick...
When it was over, he raised himself shakily and checked the interface suspended above him. The six brains glowed faintly, and the six Matoran bodies attached to them remained motionless, as still and unmoving as they had been since the Signal crossed the universe and worked its terrible transformations, however long ago that’d been. There were no more days or years since the sky had been taken apart, so it was hard to keep track.
The various linkages of the interface seemed unphased, which was more than he had expected. He steadied himself against another wave of dizziness. His mind felt…bloated…expanded, worse than normal telepathy. Helryx had mentioned side-effects…the toll of “transtemporal projection”. She was one to know, of course.
Aside from that, everything had gone according to plan. He’d conveyed the information that Helryx had provided, as best he could. The Matoran that he had addressed…the Matoran had been strange—confused at first, but seeming to understand by the end. Afterward, he’d successfully pulled himself back, though the effort had been greater than expected.
Was it enough? How would he know? Even Helryx hadn’t been sure. The fact that he was still here, in this chamber, still in continuity with past thoughts…Did that mean he had failed? Would he even recognize success? The changes might be subtle...
He looked around. The chamber looked no different than before. He placed a hand against the cool stone of the floor and sent out a sonar pulse into the substructure. Mostly intact, no new incursions, although the ominous microtremors were still there, as always.
Unsatisfied, he stood and crossed to the long row of masks embedded in the wall nearby. He removed an Akaku and an Iden and placed them on the faces of two of the inactive Matoran. He tried not to look at them for too long. It still disturbed him to see them this way, even after all this time. His sensitive hearing registered the ever-so-slight shift and rasp of their autonomic breathing.
“Get used to it,” Helryx had told him time and again. “We work with the tools we have. If you succeed, you can have all the stimulating conversations with them that I’m sure you would’ve had otherwise. I never found Ce-Matoran to be particularly good talkers myself…”
Krakua wasn’t sure that he would ever get used to it.
The interface hummed ready. He stooped and positioned himself in the center again, and the six brains glowed in a circle above him like a living Suva. Eyes closed, he exhaled and activated his own Suletu.
Suletu into Iden. Up through the stones of the fortress his consciousness projected, broadened, then coalesced. He was in open air, hovering just above the central column. Into Akaku, he swept the interior rooms briefly from above. All as expected. The many defenses continued to be manned by his forces. No change.
Now he moved his mind-spirit out to the ramparts and brought the telescopic components of the Akaku online. The dense protosteel walls went transparent, and he looked beyond:
Dry oceanbed greeted him, but that was nothing new. He had hoped...but no. In all directions the waste spread from what had once been the shores of the fortress island. His fortress, now. The ocean floor was eaten into numerous holes and channels, all the way to the smoke-filled horizon. The Swarm appeared to be focusing its efforts elsewhere for the time being. He glanced up at the sky, or what once had been sky—now a mixture of jagged gaps and fitful flickering lights. It was a strange, broken thing, and beyond his sky there was another sky. More alien, with a single great light burning down.
He remembered when the Swarm had started to eat the sky, and the stars had gone out one by one. That was when he’d known for sure that the world was over.
He had not felt that way when the first Cataclysm had struck the universe, and they all learned that the Great Spirit had been deposed by a treacherous Makuta named Teridax, nor even when the second Cataclysm followed, and the seers said that the Makuta was contending with the Great Beings themselves.
Even when the Swarms had appeared from every hollow and deep crevasse, and the strange Signal washed across the universe, converting every Matoran it reached into a servant of the Swarm, into a destroyer...he had not yet given up hope. Everyone he had sworn to protect, gone. All but the Ce-Matoran, whose minds were different, and who instead were simply hollowed out by the Signal and left empty. The seers cried that the Great Beings had cursed the universe for the crimes of the Makuta, and had sent their robotic servants to accomplish one last terrible Duty: to eat the world into Nothing.
Even then he had not fully despaired. But the sound of the world being unlidded: a deep, unnatural groaning noise that shook the atmosphere and went down into his innermost ears, into his bones…That had been the moment. There was no going back.
But Helryx had another plan. A backup plan. She always did.
The interface powered down as he reinstalled himself into his own body. He sat motionless, letting the seconds beat by. Nothing outside had changed, as far as he could tell. After all the battle and desperate strategy, all the effort, the sacrifices and pain, all the millennia of preparation…he had hoped that it would be enough, that he would not have to—
The ground shook slightly, enough to ripple the water of the dark pool. Suddenly there was a squat figure in the doorway at the other end of the chamber. Two icy-blue eyes stared at him from beneath a domed faceplate. It was one of his. It chkt'd at him in its ugly way, and he understood it—he had by now become adept at communicating with the creatures via their sound-frequencies.
“INCOMING INCURSION. NORTHERNMOST HEXTANT, BELOW,” it chkt’d.
He’d been the only Toa of Sonics in existence when the second Cataclysm arrived, and that made him uniquely suited to combat the Swarm. He was able to confuse their command-structure, deactivating individual units entirely or even turning them to his own will.
“RETURN TO COMPLEMENT,” he chkt’d in reply. “INTERCEPT AND DIVERT.”
The swarm-unit acknowledged his command and swiveled to go. Another tremor went through the floor as it did so, and for a moment it teetered, off-balance.
“Careful, Mazek—” he began to say involuntarily, but stopped. Helryx’s words drilled into him. They are gone. Their names are gone. He fought back a tide of memories, memories of a Ko-Matoran, a friend…the accursed Signal ringing in their ears—unexpected, too fast for him to neutralize it with his own counter-vibration—of the painful sound of limbs buckling and stretching, of armor fusing here and splitting there, of a voice pleading for help, pleading as the vocal tract deformed and the words distorted, and the eyes elongated into slits, still icy-blue.
Disconnecting it from the rest of the Swarm had been the only mercy he could give. They are gone. Shut it out.
No, he would never get used to it, not even after ten thousand years.
The swarm-unit had left. He sighed, resigned at last to what he must do. He removed the Iden and Akaku from the interface and re-cycled the system, checking the attachments on the Masks of Truth, Translation, and Helryx’s own Mask of Psychometry once again.
Next, he retrieved a stack of tablets from a nearby table. They were covered with writing and calculations: Helryx's logs. He waved to the far wall, and the door of the vault opened with a hiss. The chamber beyond was cold and damp, green-tinged, and filled from top to bottom with hundreds of small tubes.
And in each one there was a worm.
He surveyed the result of their centuries-long hunt through the wreckage of the world. The Order had known for some time that the transtemporal memory encoded in the nascent minds of the creatures could be used to reconnect to moments in the past, but never to change those moments. Not until Helryx’s research, and the creation of the interface.
He consulted the tablets again, tracing along the carefully organized shelves. He would have to select another specimen, target the right moment, and communicate the right message, but which to choose? Helryx had been unsure if a sequence was required, even with all her years of traversing alternate dimensions and spying on different timelines using the last remaining Olmak.
For his first attempt, just minutes ago, he had used the one that Helryx deemed to have the broadest potential: a specimen that had attached itself to a single Matoran prior to either of the cataclysms. The messages he had transmitted were obscure, something about the importance of “lightning” and “six heroes”. That was as much as he could transmit through the link.
It was odd, though. The Matoran had not responded to the name Helryx had listed. It insisted its name was something else, something starting with a “V”. He couldn't recall. Hopefully it wasn't vital. The target had been located in an important place, after all—very close to the Core. Surely it had been the right Po-Matoran...
What next? The logs offered many options. A number of specimens had apparently interacted with the Makuta Teridax himself at one point, but such direct interference seemed unlikely to succeed. Another of the worms had apparently linked itself to an ancient entity called Tren Krom at least forty millennia before the cataclysms. There might be an opportunity there, yes…
He pulled down the canister containing that specific worm and tucked it under his arm, returning to the main chamber. There was another shudder in the ground, and the stasis tubes clinked and jostled as he moved to the interface, preparing to unseal the tube.
Something stirred in the doorway on the far side of the chamber—another of his swarm-units, or one of the lesser couriers he’d peeled off. He chkt'd to dismiss it without looking, too absorbed in his task.
“The Manutri chirps its greeting,” a voice said, “but the icehawk is earless and cannot hear. It dives for the kill. Who is the greater fool?”
Krakua’s eyes snapped upward. It was a Matoran—bent and ill-shaped—standing across the room from him, examining the interface with sharp eyes.
“Who—?”
Another tremor shook the fortress. Harder this time. His forces must have engaged with the latest incursion below ground. The Matoran moved into the room. A Po-Matoran. A familiar mask. Krakua stared. For a split second, he thought he might be hallucinating. His mind still had that bloated feeling. It was possible...
“I take it that, from your perspective, we have only just spoken,” the Matoran said, stepping into the room. “For me, it’s been a little longer, but here I am.”
Krakua finally found his words: “How are you not…not…”
“Not part of the Swarm, like the rest? When the fields of Flameleaf dissolve each season and must be replanted, the hardier Firevine is exposed, for it does not melt. But that’s not really important, is it?”
It was relief that he was feeling. Relief like pain, washing over him. He felt his legs go weak. He hadn’t had a real conversation for such a long time. It was difficult to formulate his thoughts aloud.
“I thought…I thought nothing had changed,” he stammered. “Thought the message didn’t work. I can’t believe it.”
“Well...” The face of the Matoran now grew flat and serious. “You’d better get over that quick. I’ve had time to consider this plan of yours, messy though it is. You’ve at least done most of the legwork, I see.” The Matoran motioned to the open vault.
Krakua nodded slowly, still feeling a little dazed.
“First,” the Matoran continued, “you can put back that worm you’re holding. It’s the wrong one—the markings are off. We’re looking for a specimen from Metru Nui, around the time of the first Cataclysm. You have this, yes?”
“Metru Nui…” Krakua set the tube down and focused his attention, sorting through the tablets he still held. “Yes, here. I dredged the specimen from the ruins of the city outskirts, but Helryx classified it as ‘minimal impact’.”
“Did she? How disappointing. No matter. There is a Toa in the city who will need some special...encouragement, I think. And then…then we’ll see what happens.”
“Encouragement? There’s nothing about that in the notes…I wouldn’t even know where to start...”
“Encouragement was never her strong suit, I suppose. Well, I'm sure your mentor did her best, but this may have been a little beyond her expertise. Where is she, by the way? I thought she would be here.”
Krakua blinked. “She…The last time…she never came back.”
“Encouraging.”
“She was probably just delayed. Time runs differently on other planes. Or maybe—”
“Or maybe not.” The Matoran shrugged dismissively. “It doesn’t matter. We’ll work with the tools we have...”
The tools we have. Krakua’s gaze wandered to the interface as the Matoran spoke. The masks stared back at him. The eyes were open, glowing but empty.
“...And we’ll have to get a bit more creative with our messages,” the Matoran was saying. “We can do better than...whatever it was you relayed to me back then.”
The floor trembled again, just a little. By the feel of it, he could tell that his forces had been successful in deflecting the incursion. His tools...They'd report in soon.
They are gone. Their names are gone. But if you succeed...
Krakua shook himself. The Matoran was looking at him expectantly. “Well, uh...the messages have to be simple,” he said. “Otherwise the disturbance is too great, and the timeline splits.”
“Of course. Basic causality.”
“And they have to be cryptic as well—not too easy for the target to comprehend immediately, but still decipherable at the right moment.”
“You don’t say.”
“That’s the hardest part, really. Helryx hated it, and I was never any good at riddles...”
Velika smiled.
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Danny had origallany moved into this new world filled with hope and optimism. Heck, the city he moved to was named Metropolis for ancients sake and was protected by a colorful man in red underpants. He had rights in this world as a "metahuman" and he didn't need to protect anyone with all these superheros around. It was perfect.
Or so he thought.
It all started when he met and subsequently flirted with a man named Tom Davidson. They clicked almost instantly even while his little brother Damian gave Tom the stink eye. Eventually they had to leave and they happily gave thier farewells. Danny later kicks himself for not getting Toms number.
Damian confronts Tim, asking why he lied and Tim responded that he didn't want to be out as Tim Drake: Gotham Rich Guy and wanted to be normal for a while, which Damian reluctantly accepted. Tim thinks this was more because he didn't want to escalate and get into even more trouble with Bruce. That was how he got stuck with a babysitter in the first place.
"Tom" and Danny meet again a few weeks later outside of a coffee shop and they recognize eachother. Danny waves him over and they drink coffee together and chat. Afterwards Danny asks him out to coffee and they set up a time and date.
Danny didn't think asking his crush out would be this easy.
Tim actually didn't realize he'd been asked out on a date date and is just happy to hang out with someone he shares so many hobbies with.
After weeks of accidental dating, Danny invites Tim out to a fancy restaurant for a date and nothing goes as planned. First, a snobby waitress had tried to give out the table Danny had made reservations for (the one in the most romantic part of the restaurant and thus he had to pay extra) to one of her own friends and thier own date and Danny had ask the manager what was going on which got the manager involved and the girl got fired. She got dragged out yelling about who her daddy was. So already not a good night.
Both Danny and Tim were kinda awkward after that. But wait, there's more! The lady who was supposed to get the table for free thanks to her friend tried going full Karen, much to the horror of her date, who told her off and broke up with her right then and there. Fireworks ensued but Tom and Danny were seated soon after so they didn't get to see the rest. The restaurant did offer to give them complimentary desert as an apology, which was nice.
Danny said something like, "I was expecting dinner, but the show was a surprise!" Which broke the ice and got them laughing and chatting while they waited for thier meals. At some point while eating Tom perked up and said he needed to go to the bathroom and rushed off quickly. Danny thought it was odd, but blamed his paranoia on the fact he used that excuse so much to get away from situations and go play hero.
At first thats what he thought Tom was doing when he didn't come back for a while, so Danny got up and went to the bathroom to confirm his suspicions. Instead of an empty bathroom he saw Tom in there kissing some blond guy.
Danny just turned around and left without making a sound. What fresh soap opera hell was this? He walked up to thier waitress and explained the situation. She quickly got his food boxed up with both his and Toms complimentary deserts (he'll take a victory here no matter how petty) and he paid the bill and gave her a large tip before speedwalking out the door.
He ghosted Tom after that. It was a good thing he never Gave Tom his address he guessed.
He didn't see Tom for almost a month before he ran into him at a farmers market in Gotham accompanied by an elderly man in a sling. Tom introduced the man as Alfred. Alfred was very polite. Danny, however, was not. "Why are you introducing him to me?" He asked bitterly. "We're not friends."
"We're not?!" Tom asked, having the audacity to look shocked.
Danny nearly growled, but didn't want it getting out that he was anything other than perfectly human, so he bit his cheek and turned to walk away. Unfortunately for both Danny and Tom, the latter had grabbed his wrist to keep him from leaving and Danny snapped.
He grabbed the first thing he could, which was a cabbage from a nearby cart. Ignoring the owners shout of "My Cabbages!" He proceeded to absolutely hail down veggie based pain onto the creep that broke his heart. He slapped a fifty into cabbage guys hand before he turned and left in a huff.
By the time Tim recovered he was covered in veggies and bruises and very confused. Tim decided he had a new case: What the heck did I do???
Danny was mad cause he keeps running into his cheating ex. He had agreed to let Lex Corp send him out to Gotham for a few weeks on a business trip in hopes of avoiding the guy but now he's seeing him everywhere.
Angry and tired, he was not pleased to hear shouting and explosions outside his street. He opened his window and saw the Joker fighting the local hero and yelled at them to keep it down. The Joker was momentarily distracted and got his lights punched out by Batman for it.
Danny didn't think anything of the incident after that, just rolling over into bed and falling asleep. Of course the Joker tracks him down and breaks into his hotel room to try and kill him. Which leads to Danny killing the Joker in self defense.
Theres a media crapstorm from this. Danny swears he heard Vicky Vale in his hotels vents but that may have just been him hallucinating. Some super hot guy with biceps that made Danny blush hugged him and thanked him. Hes not really sure what that was about but he was just glad this was over and he could leave this cursed city in a few days.
Then Batman broke in. Danny told him to scram and somehow it turned into a fight. Maybe Batman was trying to intimidate him. Maybe he was genuinely trying to beat up a 19 year old. Whatever the reason he had still broken into a guys hotel room and attacked him...which lead to Danny panicking and using his powers to get Batman off of him...unfortunately he used the wrong power- intangibility- and killed the man instantly. His organs were on the floor, soon followed by Dannys vomit when he saw them.
The bats got the alert of Bruces vitals stopping and went nuts. Danny looked at the corpse and decided now would be a good time to get the heck out of dodge.
Of course Red Hood shows up in his apartment in Metropolis. He sat at Dannys dining table cleaning his gun and asked Danny to take a seat.
Instead of threatening him like Danny expected he began asking questions. Mostly about some "Tim" guy. Eventually everything was cleared up. Danny was mad as a hornet finding out that "Tom Davidson" was actually Tim Drake and that he was 17 instead of 19, and that he was dating that blond guy from the restaurant and claiming he didn't even realize that Danny had asked him out, which Danny called bs on.
Danny felt somewhat sick at learning he had dated a minor, even if it was supposedly only technical and only for a month or so. Danny was 19 and Tim was 17 and Danny didn't think that was okay. Hood waved it off and had him explain the events surrounding the Joker and Batmans break ins and eventually told him that he would deal with the bats but told him to watch his back because the bats were grieving and it was hard to tell what they were going to do.
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naamahdarling · 4 days
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I do want to say, because I know I am extremely and probably sometimes unfairly unforgiving of everything to do with the medical profession, that I had a really good experience last week with a team that was very empathetic and trauma-informed. The area of medicine is deeply triggering and I truly didn't know if I would even be able to talk or not. They were very understanding and respectful and I didn't feel like an inconvenience or a difficult patient, or like someone who was making a big deal out of nothing.
I know and they pointed out that I'm not the only person with this issue. This is actually common. It is utterly baffling to me that so many providers aren't able to cope with PTSD in their patients, especially patients whose trauma is medical in nature. These people treated me like a normal person who had experienced some very not-normal things.
Anyway, I had an unexpectedly hard time afterwards -- I figured the hardest part would be the appointment, and it super was not -- and have had a hard time off and on since. It has not been fun. It's been frustrating and confusing and upsetting and scary. But for once, none of that was the fault of the people I saw. I went in unsure I'd even be able to talk about it and nearly completely certain I wouldn't be able to move forward with the things I need to do. I figured I would probably have to white-knuckle it through a panic attack. I came out having held a productive conversation that left me scared, yes, but also hopeful and optimistic that I can move forward. And I didn't have a panic attack. It was a radical and unexpected change.
I worked hard for this. Any trauma is an awful thing to live with. The work of remaking yourself around the holes it punches in you is hard and confusing. The healing is often slow. In my case it comes with very few immediate rewards (it will actually make my life more difficult for a while because I'll have to deal with more medical interference, hooray). But it was time for me to do this and I have come far enough and worked hard enough to have the resilience to try, and I did it.
All we did was talk, but that would not have been possible a year ago. It was all I could do to ask for a referral because even naming the specialty was upsetting. I couldn't make the phone call to set up an appointment and when they called to try to do it, I hung up. Six or eight months ago I managed to dial the number and then hung up the instant someone answered. Last week I walked into the building and said out loud multiple words that make me feel like I have worms under my skin and which I can barely look at, let alone type. I didn't lose speech. This was a big win for me, and I'm thankful it went well, and I actually am proud of myself. I didn't even use any of my antianxiety meds that day, because I didn't think I would need them.
I don't feel grateful to the staff, I feel like someone finally did the bare fucking minimum, but I am very grateful, because I am not only what I feel. I am also what I know and what I do, and I am finally sort of getting those three things to match up in a way that they patch the holes in one another a little, and maybe someday I can stop slipping through the cracks.
I'm scared they will fuck up when I go to get some issues addressed, and they will betray me or harm me. I really am. Because hey, that's what my experiences have prepared me for, so that's a very natural way for me to feel. Rational, even.
I'm scared that I will look back at this appointment and feel stupid for having experienced any hope at all.
But even if it goes to shit, I still went in there and tried. I still did my best. And my best was okay. I was able to separate my fear from what needed to be done just a little bit. That means something. Because I didn't think I could do it at all.
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septembercfawkes · 3 months
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Circling vs. Zigzagging Conflicts
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Nearly every writer understands that a story needs conflict. The protagonist sets off to fulfill a goal, runs into an antagonistic force, and their struggle creates conflict. This should happen in the story as a whole, this should happen in acts, and it should happen in almost every scene--the difference is that the smaller the structural unit, the smaller the antagonist and conflict (simplistically speaking).
Today I want to talk about a sneaky problem I sometimes see when editing manuscripts, one that relates to conflicts.
Sometimes the writer simply “circles” the conflict.
What I mean is that after a given conflict, nothing has actually changed in the story. We just completed a “circle.”
For example, say the protagonist is a favorite target of the schoolyard bully. They get into a verbal fight, but when it's over, nothing's different. The conflict didn't have any consequences.
It may not sound that bad.
And if it only happens once in a while, and there are enough other conflicts going on, it may not be.
But if this happens repeatedly or this is the main conflict, the plot isn't progressing. It just did a circle and the characters ended up in the same situation they were before the encounter. Essentially, no matter how exciting the scene may seem to be, you could still cut it and the story would be the same.
Let's look at an even less obvious example.
The protagonist needs to get Object X from Character B.
The protagonist finds a way to successfully steal it.
But then immediately afterward, Character B steals it back.
The scene ends, and the protagonist is back at square one.
It doesn't sound that bad, does it?
And if it only happens once in a while, and there are enough other conflicts going on, it may not be.
But if this sort of thing happens repeatedly--over and over and over--the plot isn't progressing. You're just going back and forth and back and forth and back and forth. And if we just arc that path a bit, guess what? It creates a circle.
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Another example:
The protagonist has a problem.
But she's not taking action to solve the problem. 
Yes, she reacts emotionally to the problem.
She may even sometimes come up with a plan for how to try to solve the problem.
But she doesn't execute it. Or, some other problem comes up that keeps her from executing it.
And rather than come up with and execute a new plan to address that problem.
She just reacts emotionally to the problem.
Imagine this going on for multiple scenes.
The plot isn't progressing. She's just ruminating.
It still feels like the text is just circling the conflict.
Please know I'm not saying a story can never do these things. On rare occasions, circling conflicts can be useful, like when the point is to show the audience how some things don't change. My first example may arguably work near the beginning of the story, to show what the protagonist's day-to-day life is like. My second example can sometimes work as a frustrating irony. And my last example, well . . . don't do my last example. Okay, okay, maybe it could work to show off how the protagonist is incapable of or has the flaw of never moving forward (and chances are it'd probably be better to illustrate that through summary, rather than scene).
And some degree of circling can work, when the story needs to end with the characters and world in the same place they started, like in a serial, but note that usually through the installment, there isn't much circling.
And often, even if the external circumstances complete a circle, the journey changed the character internally in some significant way.
BUT if you are repeatedly writing examples like those above, where the situation at the end of a scene or act is essentially the same as it was at the beginning of the scene or act, then you aren't moving the story forward.
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Sure, conflict may show up on the page, but the text is just circling it.
Instead, it's much more effective to create a zigzag. 
If we wanted to keep this super simple, we might say the scene (or act) needs to move from a positive situation to a negative situation, or a negative situation to a positive situation. Or, a positive situation to a better situation, or a negative situation to a worse situation. Essentially:
+ --> -
- --> +
+ --> ++
- --> --
This is a good starting point, but I admit, it sometimes feels oversimplified to me.
In any case, the situation the character is in, has changed.
The story didn't do a circle. It did a zigzag (or zigzigger or zagzagger). 
The protagonist had a goal, encountered an antagonist, had a conflict, and the conflict came to a definitive outcome (if only on the small scale for that scene). It hit a climax or turning point.
And that outcome carries consequences.
The protagonist gets in an argument with the bully and gets suspended for his language. If he's suspended, his parents will ground him, and he won't get to go on an upcoming date with his crush. It's a setback.
Character B steals Object X back and in the process, mortally wounds the protagonist. Now the protagonist needs to get help before they die.
The protagonist takes action to solve the new problem, and not only succeeds, but manages to solve her original problem at the same time.
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But often just adding consequences isn't enough. We need to make sure the consequences aren't or can't be undone, at least not easily or coincidentally. We don't have the protagonist's dad have a serendipitous change of heart and simply allow the protagonist to go on the date.
Don't undo what you just did (generally speaking). 
If the protagonist ended with a bigger or new problem, make him put in the effort to try to solve it. (See the "No, and . . ." vs. "Yes, but . . . " rule under "Disaster.")
And don't forget my "acid test" for plot progression. At the end of the scene (or act), ask, did the protagonist's current goal and/or plan shift? If the answer is no, chances are you did a circle. (Or you at least left things stagnating). If the answer is yes, something changed.
As I mentioned above, sometimes the change is internal. 
Maybe Character B did simply steal Object X back, but maybe that leads to the protagonist realizing he doesn't want Object X as much as he wants revenge on Character B. He hatches a plan to exact that.
While that may not be as strong as the protagonist getting mortally wounded, it's better than nothing changing, and the experience does change the direction of the story.
Personally, I'd still be cautious of writing such a situation, though. In most types of stories, we want consequences to be both internal and external.
But that topic could be another post.
So in closing: zigzagging conflicts is better than circling them.
Adieu.
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cuddling w peter 😔🫶
my favorite 🫶🫶
here’s a cutesy lil blurb that i’ve had in the works for a while :) ik it’s mid september but this concept was just too tempting !!
inspired by a prompt on my pinterest feed:
“ let’s get you home. you’re freezing and i don’t want you catching a cold. ”
✨masterlist.✨
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1k.
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You love cuddling with Peter. His warm hands snug around you, his head hidden away from the world in your neck, and his gentle lips brushing your skin. It was a shelter for you; a comfort. Plus, you were the perfect size for him, and he was the perfect size for you. You fit each other in an unspoken understanding. An understanding met with touch and serenity.
When it was your turn to be the big spoon, you could easily drape your arms around him. His body flush to yours, you knew that nothing could ever harm you in the hold of your boyfriend. It’s why you always cling to him whenever you’re together. You love to grab his hand, or keep your head rested on his shoulder. You know he loves your touch just as much from the way he hugs you from behind, and presses his knee to yours whenever you’re together.
You two are almost always together, except when you’re at work, or he’s patrolling, or when you need a healthy boundary set.
This time, his absence was requested by a regulated patrol. He invited you to sleep over, just like he usually did on the weekends. You camped out in his empty room, dressed in his clothes and finishing assignments in your pastime. May was more than happy with your unseen companionship and your presence filling his bedroom; just as long as her nephew came back intact, everything was fine.
Of course, your place of residence was New York City. Anything was possible. And blizzards, in January, were more than likely. The winds were blistering, and you could feel the chill seeping through Peter’s sealed window. Even with the heat on, you felt the shivers shake your figure in the protection of Peter’s hoodie.
Before you knew it, the window opened, revealing your frostbitten boyfriend and his shaking–superhero boots. He’s all shiver–me–timbers and frigid and smiles. The sight of his smile after he takes off his mask momentarily warms the cold air bleeding in through the window, but as the winds howls louder, your trembling intensified.
You stood from your his chair, helping him inside without dragging in the snow. “Jesus, babe!” The words came out as a gasp, “You’re freezing..” You could’ve told him that his shoulders felt cold as ice through his suit, or warned him about the snowflakes freckling the shape of his curls, but you mentally argued against it. Instead, you pulled him in with a bit more urgency than before, and hastily shut the window.
And he just stood there, watching, grinning. You could tell he felt taken care of, and you hadn’t even gotten started yet. His dopey grin was something contagious, and instantly spread itself across your cheeks. You kissed his frosty nose, lacing the warmth of your fingers through the icicles of his. “C’mon, Pete, I don’t want you catching a cold.” You spoke gently, tugging him towards his closet for a change of clothes.
There was no need to address the newest drapes of purple under his eyes, or the shadows of extra crinkles and stress lines scribbling themselves on his forehead. There were no words necessary for you to pry on just how sobering the patrol truly got. It was an unspoken acknowledgement. An acknowledgement you addressed in the seconds added to the length of your hugs, and the extra kisses you’d dress his face with.
If Peter ever started the conversation, that was his decision. And when he did, you were there to listen. You were always there to support him, however he needed. Like right now, as you helped him change into warmer clothes.
He’d put on a pair of gray sweatpants, and you helped him wiggle his way into a band tee, then added the extra layer of a hoodie on top of it. Immediately afterwards, you cupped your hands over his and breathed into them, trying to gift him back some of the warmth he always provided you. And he just stood there, watching. He smiled a smile of sickly sweetness and sunshine. It was laced with a familiar glisten. A glistening of admiration.
“I love you.” He lulled, appreciatively. Peter’s figure melted towards yours, still shaking from the cold, but relaxing in your touch. His forehead rested against yours, smiling at you with his famous smile of peace and security. “I love how you take care of me. And, God..” The last word nagged on his breath so adamantly, his eyes rolled lightly with it. “I missed you.”
His lips traced a thousand words into your knuckles as he kissed them, pulling you in and holding you like it’d be the last time he’d ever be allowed to. He held you like it was his purpose, like it answered all of the questions he’d been dying to ask. His biceps against your own and fingers pressed to your back, his legs intertwined between yours as two of you took rocky steps in the stumbled direction of his bed.
The embrace wasn’t worth releasing to attempt at a safe venture to Peter’s mattress. Besides, he trusted his spidey–sense to alert him if he were about to take a tumble.
Laid and nuzzled together and husked into the warmth of his bed, you both released the weight that had been perched on your shoulders. All the crates of stress and homework and saving citizens and the outside world just beyond the walls of Peter’s bedroom suddenly vanished. All that was left was the hushed sound of Peter’s heart pressing to his chest and the faint chorus of your breaths whisked with the air.
Your fingers had a habit of drawing little shapes along the length of Peter’s body while you cuddled; tracing lines down his arm, writing out indescribable paragraphs of all that he meant to you with the tips of your fingers. He welcomed the notion by pressing kisses to your hairline and murmuring tongues of praises and appreciation into the space between you.
Body to body, huddled together, you knew there was no other place you wanted to be. Cuddled with your boyfriend was heaven; it was perfection, comfort and safe haven and eternity and shelter. Most importantly, it was yours. And no one could take it away from you.
Truly, you couldn’t think of anything better.
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sunnycanvas · 8 months
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and what about Baldwin and his wife having married (because of their parents and politics) as children, but not sharing a (first) kiss until he returned from his Great Victory at 16?
We were both young when I first saw you
I close my eyes and the flashback starts
Queen (Y/N) fondly looks at painting .She is old and gray now. She strokes the painting with tears running down her eyes. She smiles and closes her eyes when she remembers that fateful day
I'm standin' there
On a balcony in summer air
The little girl was bored out her mind. She was on the balcony of palace as she put her hand on her cheek. Just then the little girl heard giggles and looked down and saw bunch of boys mocking her. A boy bright blue eyes and blonde hair stood out the most,"Oo! Look at her face". The boys squished their face opposing her mocking her posture. The little girl hurt cried out "Wait, when I get down there" "I will show you how strong I am!" The boys loving her reaction say "Oo! The little girly wants to fight The little girl with tears in her eyes ran away crying
"What a shame, she left"
"Yeah, it was fun mocking her but unfortunately she left"
"Man, I am bored now" "What should be playing next"
"Oh, I know" said the boy with bright blue eyes and blonde hair. "How about we play a game where we pinch each other to find out who is the strongest". The boys scoffed and rolled their eyes annoyed "How boring"
"Yeah! Suggest something else". The boy with bright blue eyes and blonde hair smirks and says don't forget who is the prince. His friends grumbled and finally agreed. While they were playing the little girl came to them and said "See I came down just like I said I challenge you to play with me as well" . The boys let out mischievous smile and agreed to her request "Atleast we all can overpower her" "Yeah, she looks weak" while the boy with bright blue eyes and blonde hair smiled and muttured "Silly girl" Just as they expected the girl wasn't able to bear the pain. The prince feeling sorry for the girl decided to step in. "I shall protect her, anyone who wants to hurt her has to go through me first" his friends taking their opportunity pinched the prince but nothing happened. Unknown to them a man working under William of tyre observed everything and decided to inform him. The prince finally turned to look behind to see the girl but unfortunately she had already left.
"Baldwin, your teacher is calling you"
See the lights, see the party, the ball gowns
See you make your way through the crowd
And say, "Hello"
Little did I know
It was the prince's birthday. Her father and king greet each other. King Almaric I addressed his son and said "Baldwin, meet your betrothed"
"Me and her father decided that you will marry her".
The little girl shyly poked out her head behind her father. Her father chuckled and said "Please forgive my daughter for she is shy" "Introduce yourself dear" The girl shyly looked at the prince and said "My name is (Y/N)". The prince said "My name is Baldwin". Baldwin shyly came forward and said "Here are some flowers as an apology for yesterday" "Please forgive me, my teacher scolded me and said a true knight protects and honours the lady and doesn't hurt her". (Y/N) astonished by beautiful flowers said "That's alright, besides you protected me afterwards".
"Really, what happened" inquired (Y/N)'s father. (Y/N) smiled and said "We were pinching game with the prince protecting me afterwards, while fighting the other boys he felt no pain" . Baldwin IV beamed in reply not noticing how pale (Y/N)'s father became.
That you were Romeo, you were throwin' pebbles
And my daddy said, "Stay away from Juliet"
"I can see why the king was desperate to get you betrothed". "I can't back away now since I already accepted it and it could be dangerous but stay away from him" "He is a leper and he will die soon and might get you infected as well". (Y/N) and her father heard sound of pebbles hitting the window. They both went out and saw the Prince Baldwin with few knights. Noticing her father one of the knight commanded "The prince has requested that his betrothed come down and play with him." (Y/N)'s father reluctantly let her go not before warning her about the prince's disease.
And I was cryin' on the staircase
Beggin' you, "Please don't go,
Baldwin IV approached his betrothed with no expression on his face. "I have been just informed about my diesease" "My father says this disease is god's vengeance against the saracens, if it's true I call it unfair" Baldwin IV chuckled as he said the last statement. He soon went into deep thought and you suddenly noticed how beautiful his bright blue eyes are, you unconsciously leaned forward but Baldwin IV closed your mouth with his hand. "I am aware now your father is upset about the engagement, I understand his sentiment and think it's best we annul it"
and I said
Romeo, take me somewhere we can be alone
I'll be waiting, all there's left to do is run
You'll be the prince and I'll be the princess
It's a love story, baby,l just say, "Yes"
(Y/N) cried when she heard those words and Baldwin IV immediately regretted saying those words. (Y/N) cried and said"Please don't say that, I really want to marry you and don't worry about annulment" "Father says he can't do anything about it since it's already agreed upon" "We will soon marry each other" "You are the prince and I'll be the princess" "Please don't leave me" "Let's meet again secretly so that I can convince you" (Y/N) hiccuped since she cried so much. Baldwin IV wanted to wipe of her tears but retorted in last moment. He asked rather confused "You would purposely marry a leper and be known as leper's wife". (Y/N) in tears nodded her head signalling her acknowledgement. Baldwin IV smiled and said "Silly girl"
So I sneak out to the garden to see you
We keep quiet, 'cause we're dead if they knew
So close your eyes
Escape this town for a little while, oh oh
Late at night (Y/N) wears a hood as dark as night and sneakily goes out of her manor with the help of king's gaurd. "Baldwin" smiled the girl and went in for a hug but the prince signalled her to stop so with heartbroken expression she stopped. "My father is worried that your family with their influence of their power will break our engagement and get you to marry someone else" "Hence, they have asked me to assist you to come out of your manor and called a priest here to get you to marry me now". (Y/N) looked at her left and suddenly saw a priest looking at the prince with disapproved reaction. "My lord" said the priest. "You must know how important this marriage is for the betterment of the kingdom". However Baldwin IV paid no heed to priest's word and said "It's your choice, according to the law of church nobody can force you to marry against your will" "Not even the priest". (Y/N) with determined expression said "I will marry, for us and the kingdom" . The priest smiled and said "That's a smart girl". "I can see she will befitting queen our Kingdom needs". (Y/N) looked at prince Baldwin IV and asked "When will I get to touch you". Baldwin IV smiled at responce saying "When miracles will happen, then only I can trust god's plan for me and let me touch"
Romeo, save me, they're tryna tell me how to feel
This love is difficult, but it's real
Don't be afraid, we'll make it out of this mess
It's a love story, baby, just say, "Yes"
Oh, oh
Years growing up it had been difficult for (Y/N) and Baldwin IV. She came to be known as leper's wife. Baldwin IV although was kind and respectful to (Y/N) didn't allow her to get too close. Worried that she will get infected like him. As for her family and relatives, (Y/N) had been labelled as disgrace. Although they appeared kind to her in public especially when she became queen. She knew about their deep rooted hatred for her and how she had become subject to pity as well as mockery among people. (Y/N) didn't care as long as she had Baldwin IV as her husband. He had been kind and devoted to her that is until oneday......
I got tired of waiting
Wonderin' if you were ever comin' around
My faith in you was fading
When I met you on the outskirts of town, and I said
"Must you leave" (Y/N) said tears in her eyes. Baldwin IV looked at his wife sorrowfully and said "Honey, I don't want to leave you". "I don't want to leave you behind but this day was bound to come sooner or later". "You knew the day you married a leper". (Y/N) in tears aggressively held Baldwin IV shoulder and said "I never knew you would go to battlefield". Baldwin IV sighed and said "I have duty to my crown, God has entrusted me to protect my people as king" "I can't do that". (Y/N) hurriedly said "Let me come with you".
"No" retorated Baldwin IV. "You are currently a queen regent and you will protect the kingdom in my absence".
"Besides it's too dangerous for you"
(Y/N) sighed tiredly and said "Atleast promise me to come back alive".
"I promise" said Baldwin IV
Romeo, save me, I've been feeling so alone
I keep waiting for you, but you never come
Is this in my head? I don't know what to think
Queen (Y/N) waited day and night for her lord husband and took care of the kingdom as if they were her children. No news of her husband came and (Y/N) gradually got worried. Especially knowing that Baldwin IV army was much smaller compared to Salahuddin. (Y/N) prayed that her husband would come back alive and safe to stay by her side again. As days passed by, so did (Y/N) mental health. While she excelled in her work. No court gossip could hide the fact that the queen was in constant state of melancholy for the arrival of her husband.
And I said
You'll never have to be alone
I love you and that's all I really know
"Baldwin" exclaimed (Y/N) happily. There stood her husband bloodied but alive with no serious injury in front of her. (Y/N) rushed forward for a hug but stopped last moment "S-sorry you wouldn't like that" instead she was shocked with what happened next. Baldwin IV kissed her properly on her lips. Baldwin IV tongue completely dominated (Y/N) tongue. Baldwin IV still unsatisfied angled his head to kiss his beloved deeper. (Y/N) soon had difficultly in breathing and gasped her shoulder tightly."Silly girl, going for a hug". "God has finally shown me favour" "We won battle of Montingsard" . "Now" Baldwin IV voice lowered dangerously and her checked out his wife and said looking at her for top to bottom. "I can do everything I want". "Come my love let me worship you on bed".
'Cause we were both young when I first saw you
(Y/N) smiled as she remembered that day and touched the painting which depicted romanticised picture of king and queen meeting after Battle of Montingsard. (Y/N) yawned and went to sleep clutching the painting.
"My love". The king old and tired said, He foundly looked at his wife and said "You are so beautiful". Suddenly he realised that his wife had been clutching the painting". "Silly girl, missing me again". The king kissed (Y/N) forehead and went to sleep beside her.
Romeo and Juliet by Taylor Swift
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cabinofimagines · 1 year
Text
Wait for me?
Ah, it is the yearly Poly!Solangelo fic for my birthday (the 11th for timezone sake) :) Gotta keep writing hehe
thanks to my ex (my muse ) and Danny for proofreading!
Pairing: Poly!Solangelo x reader, Will Solace x reader x Nico di Angelo Request: Hey, I was thinking maybe a solangelo x reader where the reader comes back late from a quest- like it took them longer to complete then they thought it would and Nico and Will were all worried and then just general fluff or something? Feel free to ignore if you don’t want to write it Word count: 3.4k Warnings: mentions of death a few times, some angst
-Asnyox
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The low flicker of the campfire put everyone in an orange light. For a bit you had actually managed to sing some songs with the few campers still at camp, but the energy was a little low. 
“It’s always kind of weird when people leave after winter break, huh,” Austin remarked while he was still softly strumming his guitar. “Yeah, the quiet comes back too quickly.” Will said from beside you. He was holding a sleepy Nico close to him on his other side, while softly playing with your fingers too, “At least the infirmary will be empty again,” “Oh no, we might get bored,” Kayla joked softly, “Hey, Rachel, weren't you going back today too?” Rachel nodded her head, after which she shook it again. She sighed. “I wanted to, but I feel like I am forgetting something. There is something I need to do before I can leave camp and it is eating at me.” Rachel stared into the flames before groaning loudly. “I hate this.”
“Well, dear child, I do not remember any tasks given to you.” Chiron spoke as he walked closer to the campfire, “Perhaps a belated prophecy as our Oracle?” he suggested. Rachel perked up. Her eyes widened as green smoke started to come from her mouth.
(Y/n) will return alone, after collecting the stone, and repairing a parents shrine, Only then, all shall be fine.
 Will’s grip on your hand suddenly got tight, as Nico sat up from his position, clearly distressed. The green smoke faded and Chiron quickly caught Rachel as she fell down. 
“(Y/n),” Chiron addressed you as he made sure Rachel was sat safely, “it is most unusual that you have been directly addressed by name. This most likely is a quest from your godly parent, do you accept this quest?” You could feel the eyes of your boyfriends on you, their worried gazes burning into your head. You knew they would not want you to go, but it was your parent, who chose you to do this. 
“I do.” you said, and you heard protests from your boyfriends. 
“I will-” Nico started, “I mean we will go with (Y/n).” the son of Hades looked at Chiron, who shook his head slowly. “I fear that that is not possible, my child.” Chiron stated calmly, “As the prophecy demands (Y/n) to go alone.” Chiron turned to you, “It probably is best if we go over possible details at this moment, so you can leave in the morning if you wish.” 
You started to stand up, and so did your boyfriends. 
“Will, Nico, I-” you purse your lips. “I want to know the details-” Will started but you shook your head. “How about you go to my cabin while I discuss this with Chiron?” You grabbed both a hand of Nico and one of Will, “That way will probably be quicker, and I will tell you the details afterwards, okay?” Reluctantly your boyfriends nodded their heads, as they watched you walk off. 
───────────
“I don’t care what the prophecy says!” Will grumbled as you were packing your bags, “What about the rule of three!” “That contradicts ‘will return alone’ Will, we’ve been over this.” you sighed, a slight tremble in your voice, “I don’t want to go without you, but I will not” you glared at your boyfriend, “needlessly endanger the loves of my life by ignoring the prophecy.” you waved your hand, “besides, it’s like Chiron said, just a small thing to do for my godly parent and then I will be back! Nothing to worry about.” You heard Will sigh from behind you as you went over your belongings one more time. 
“I don’t like it.” Nico stated, “I want to protect you, you shouldn’t have to go in alone.” You turned around to see your boyfriends sitting together on an empty bunk bed. You walked forward and motioned them to scootch apart, worming yourself between them. You softly grabbed both their hands, squeezing them softly. Nico leaned his head on your shoulder. 
“It’s not like we have much of a choice. It’s either going alone, or most definitely get you two mortally wounded, if not outright killed.” “But what if you get hurt?” Will whispered, “What if I am not there to help you?” “You will be, after all,” you looked at Will, meeting his eyes, “You taught me how to do first aid, don’t tell me you’re doubting your skills as a mentor?” Will grimaced as his gaze softened. 
“We will still be worried about you, love.” Will slowly moved towards you and gave you a careful kiss, “and we’ll miss you.” 
“I will miss you both.” you sighed, “I think that might be the worst part.” You felt Nico snuggle into your neck, “Just promise me you’ll wait at camp for me?” “I guess,” Nico mumbled, “But if I catch any wind of you being in danger I don’t think Will would stop me.” Will nodded his head in agreement. “Nico!” you paused, “Gods I love you both Will, please make sure Nico won’t do anything stupid,” Will hummed in agreement, as Nico protested with a weak ‘Hey!’ “Oh and Nico, please make sure Will doesn’t do anything either-” Now it was time for Will to feign hurt.
“Why is he not allowed to do anything stupid, and I am not allowed to do anything?” Will put a hand over his heart. 
“Love, I think you’ll be too busy looking after Nico.” you shrugged, “and the last time we let you do stuff you somehow came back with six cats to take care of so,” 
Will sighed as he went back to leaning on you, “I am going to miss you,” he pressed a kiss on your shoulder. 
“I’ll miss you too, but if all goes according to plan I will be back in a fortnight!” you promised your boyfriends.
───────────
The next day you were off, leaving behind two worried boyfriends. With a positive attitude, and your sword on your side, you were sure this would all be a piece of cake. However, the first obstacle was already in your way after only a few hours of traveling. 
You sighed as you checked the map. The first part of the quest was to find the right material to repair the shrine, and sadly the Home Depot you went to was all out of it, so the first ‘easy’ part was getting harder with the second. What should you do, rent an Uber to bring you to the next closest Home Depot (you did not have that much money on you), ask the Gray Sisters to do it instead (that would be a near death experience) or try stealing some from a museum? The last one might not be the smartest, but then why would there be a museum right next to the Home Depot? 
On your way you went. 
───────────
The sun was setting and it had been a few days since you left. Nico and Will sat together as they looked out over the strawberry fields, definitely not in case you were going to suddenly show up from outside the border. 
“I miss them.” Nico sighed, “But they will be okay, right?” “I hope so,” Will leaned his head on Nico’s shoulder, “What do you think they ate for dinner?” Will felt Nico sink down a little. “I don’t know, what if they didn’t have any?” Nico tensed a little, “What if they are stuck in a hole right now, desperately trying to get out?” Will huffed. “Do you think they drank enough water?” Will asked and Nico made a non committal noise, and Will sensed his worry, “What if they found a new kind of demigod and became ambassador for their godly parent there without telling us?”  “What do you-” Nico gasped, “Hey! It would have been dangerous to introduce Camp Half-Blood to Camp Jupiter at the time!” Nico protested, roughly sitting up. Will swiftly followed his movement. Nico glared at Will, “I am seriously worried about them, okay?” 
“I know, Nico, my sunshine,” Will smiled, “But what if they get accused of kidnapping their parent and become a wanted criminal throughout the entire states?” Nico’s glare faltered. “I think it’s more likely that they lose their memory,” Nico hesitated, “to get raised by wolves for a bit, before they arrive at Camp Jupiter. At least then we will find them again.” Will softly cupped Nico’s cheek with his hand
“They will come back to us,” Will kissed Nico, “We just need to trust them.” 
───────────
Nico paled when he realized where you were. He had heard the story of Em’s emporium from Percy and Annabeth. Why were you here? 
“Stupid cyclops with it’s stupid hands and fucking-” you walked into frame. Nico tried to move closer, but he noticed he was stuck. Stuck as a statue. “Take a breath (Y/n),” you looked around, “Improvise, adapt, overcome. There must be statues around here somewhere, it won’t be as fancy but it will be enough.” 
You walked up to Nico, staring directly into his eyes. 
“This one should do.” You brazed yourself, and pushed him to the ground. 
Nico woke up in a cold sweat, shaking. Why were you in his dreams- his nightmares? You seemed to be alright, but he knew this was not part of the discussed plan- you were in danger- what if-
Nico started to sit up, only to feel his hand press into another body. 
“Ouch-,” Will groaned as Nico recoiled, “Love?” Nico rested his back against the wall, counting the timing of his breaths- in for four, hold for five and out- in, hold out.
“Nico?” Will entered his vision, “Nightmare?” Nico nodded, reminding himself that you were alright even if you were in his dreams. Will positioned himself next to Nico, not touching him, but he could feel the bed shift. Will recounted a few times where Nico had nightmares, and he fell into a routine the three of you had set up. 
“Do you want to talk, or for me to try to guess what it is?” Will asked and Nico nodded, “Talk?” Nico shook his head.
“About down there?” Will asked, Nico signaled ‘no’, “Your past?” Nico shook his head again, “I don’t know uhm,” Will felt Nico nudge his hand, and he carefully grabbed it, “Can you help me out, love?” Nico licked his lips. 
“(Y/n),” his breath hitched. Will squeezed his hand as he tensed. “Are they alright?” he whispered, and Nico softly nodded, “But you’re scared because they’re in your dreams?” and Nico nodded again, leaning against Will now. Will engulfed his boyfriend in his arms. Will softly rubbed Nico’s back. “It’s okay to be scared,” Will whispered, “I am too,” and Will realized he could no longer promise Nico that you would be alright. He just hoped you would be. 
───────────
After the last nightmare, the nights became restless. If the planning would have been right, you should have been back two days ago but you were not. Nico was scared that the next time he would dream it would be about your dead body, and he continuously attempted to sense your soul. You were getting further away, but you were not dead.
Yet. 
He hadn’t had a new dream about you, and Will got permission form Chiron to stay over most nights. Together they talked, but whenever the topic turned to you the conversation quickly quieted, both of the boys in their own worlds of worry. At some point, Will had put on your favorite movie, putting out the snacks you normally ate. But, the gummy worms went untouched, and as Nico hugged Beanjamin close -his weighted goose plushie - he slowly dozed off. 
Will was worried. He noticed the growing bags under Nico’s eyes, but how could he help? Austin nowadays reassured him multiple times a day that you would be back any moment now, but would you? Will didn’t blame his boyfriend for having a nightmare about you, however Nico and nightmares were never a good sign. What if it just meant you were gone? 
As Will leaned closer, he could already hear Nico whimper from another nightmare. 
Oh no.
Nico turned around, suddenly face to face with his lover. You looked beaten, but not injured. Dirt stains covered your clothes and face, and Nico tried to reach out to you, only to phase right through you. 
“Why the fuck is this tunnel not ending yet!”  You huffed, before sitting down on the floor and leaning against the wall, “This will be easy they said,” you mumbled, holding in a sob, “easy my fucking ass” 
Nico stepped forward, “(Y/n), please” You closed your eyes in defeat. “keep going for me-” he begged you before the dream faded away. 
Will hated how deep Nico could sleep when he was having nightmares. Every time it felt like the dreams would suck Nico in, only letting him go when he had seen everything. “Nico please-” Will called out just as Nico shot up, hitting his head against Will’s head.
“Fuck!” both boys exclaimed. 
“Sorry,” Will said after a moment, “I should not have been hovering above you, I guess.” 
“What are you sorry for?” Nico sighed, “It’s not like you could’ve known.” They both sat in silence, not looking at one another. 
“I heard you say their name,” Will hesitated, “Are they alright?” Nico swallowed harshly. “They didn’t look injured-” Nico clenched his fists. “But?” Will prompted. “Something must be wrong.” Nico sighed, “They were crying, something about a tunnel- I don’t-” Nico looked Will in the eye, “I think we should go.” “Okay, but we need to discuss it with Chiron, tomorrow.” Will said. 
“But!” Nico shook his head, “I guess you are right, fuck.” 
“I know, I am sorry.”
─────────── 
The conversation with Chiron did not go well. Nico was seething, standing at the border of camp as Will held him tightly. 
“They are hurt Will! I can’t just sit here and wait for them to die!” 
“I promised them I wouldn’t let you do anything stupid!” Will tightened his grip, “I promised, Nico.” 
“But what about protecting them?” Nico was no longer yelling, “What about loving them?” Will tensed and he wished to fucking scream at Nico. Instead, he decided to be the bigger person and he took a deep breath. 
“I love them and I love you.” a pause, “and I cannot stand that you are making me choose.” Will felt his shirt slowly get damp. He hated it when Nico cried, but it was better than when he was angry. Will closed his eyes as he felt Nico’s arm sneak around his waist. 
“I can’t lose them,” Nico mumbled, “I can’t lose you but-” he gasped for air, “I’m sorry, I’m terrified.” Will held his boyfriend in silence, pressing his lips to the top of Nico’s head, as he slowly let his own tears flow. The wind blew around them, leaves rustling as they both tried to calm down. Slowly their breaths synchronized. 
And suddenly another pair of arms engulfed the two of them. 
“What-” Will quickly pushed the third person away, as Nico stepped back. “Geez guys, I know that I haven’t showered yet but this is excessive-” “It’s you,” Nico’s voice quivered. “It’s me,” You smiled painfully, “I need to go to the infirmary-” you clutched your side, and before you could even move Will and Nico were at your side, holding you up, “Sorry I took so long.” “I love you, and would love to talk,” Will grimaced, “But my priority is healing you, my love.” 
“Thank you.”
─────────── 
Much to Will’s chagrin, Austin stood on taking care of your wounds as he was on shift. He had tried to object, but Austin was right that perhaps he was not in the most emotionally stable state to professionally assess the injuries you had sustained. So, Nico and him were just standing outside of the infirmary until you were properly patched up. Next to him, Nico had his eyes closed, and if Will didn’t know better he would think Nico was relaxing. However, Will did know better, and the creasing of Nico’s eyebrows worried him. 
“How are they doing?” Will asked. Nico’s eyes sprung open, as he was surprised by the voice of his boyfriend. Nico had been concentrating on the feeling of your soul, which seemed too far away but so close. He had fully forgotten that Will was there with him, waiting on you too.
“Their souls wavers sometimes,” Nico let out a breath, “Which is normal for injured people, I guess.” Will nodded in response. He had to remind himself that Austin had as much skill as he had, and that you were not in any mortal danger when you arrived. You had to be fine, you would be fine. 
These thoughts did not stop Will’s heart from stopping when Austin walked out, looking a little dejected. “How’s-” Will started. “They kept correcting me on what I was doing,” Austin laughed, “A bit embarrassing for me, but they are alright.” 
“Thanks, can we go in?” Nico asked, ignoring Austin’s comment. Austin stepped aside, and Will and Nico made their way inside the infirmary. 
As your boyfriends approached you, they saw the awful state you were in. Nico went to stand on the right side of the infirmary bed you were in, and Will on the left.Neither of your boyfriends dared to step closer, as you were barely sitting upright. Instead they each grabbed a chair and sat down within reach of you, wordlessly.
“Did you get any ambrosia yet? Nectar?” Will slowly moved closer as his stomach churned at the sight of your weakened state. You tried to shake your head, but quickly stopped as you closed your eyes in pain. “I am at my limit already, didn’t really have time to properly heal up on my way here.” your voice came out rough, but steady, “How are you two holding up? Missed me?” Nico’s gaze went from your face to your hand. It was wrapped in a bandage, much like the rest of your upper arm. 
“We were worried about you, my love.” Nico heard Will speak as he softly grabbed the blanket instead of your hand. He didn’t want to accidentally hurt you, and your form seemed so bruised and broken. His ears still picked up Will, who was retelling all that happened since you were gone, but his brain did not process it. Instead, he feared that just being here was already weakening you. He knew his presence wouldn’t hurt but- but what if the essence of death brought you closer? What if he made his nightmares come true? 
“... has been having dreams about you. That’s why we were at the border.” At the mention of his name, Nico looked up, releasing the deathgrip he had on the blanket. 
“Oh?” you looked at the son of Hades, “all good dreams I hope?” Nico’s head stopped any thought it had when he looked into your eyes. Your shining, alive, eyes and your handsome face. “That doesn’t matter,” Nico muttered as he sat more upright, a feeling of ease coming over him, “Now that you’re back, it doesn’t matter.” Nico was never going to let you go alone again, as he promised himself to keep protecting you no matter what. 
Will looked at his boyfriend, as he smiled. The past few weeks had been rough on them, even worse on you, but the three of you were finally together. You still looked tired, but less so after your talk. Will knew that he would need to wait until you were better and as Austin walked back into the infirmary he stood up. 
“I think we should let (Y/n) rest, Nico.” he wanted to hold you in his arms until you fell asleep, but you needed uninterrupted sleep for now. Nico nodded as he too stood up. Tomorrow he would hold you, if you were better. He will wait until you are healed.
“Sleep well. Love you.” Will said as he waited for Nico to be at his side. “Love you, (Y/n). See you later.” Nico had a ghost of a smile on his face. 
You carefully laid down, before saying a final ‘I love you’ to your boyfriends, as you could finally relax.
But just before your boyfriends went away there was one more promise to be made to them.
“I’ll see you tomorrow?” Will knew that he and Nico would wait forever for them, if they needed it to heal. He didn’t know when this journey would end, but he would walk besides you and Nico, hand in hand. Nico knew he couldn’t promise you a kind road, or a fair sky, but he knew that he would protect you and besides you in any way he can. 
“We will,” Will promised, a promise he can keep.
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