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#I have been the upset person that took digs at their ex before

whoblewboobear · 2 months

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Getting hung up on Tracker and Kristen taking digs at each other when they’re still talking about something bigger like religion frustrates me to no end. Yes they are exes, yes things can come off rude but neither one of them has been wrong in the meat of what they’re saying when discussing religion and the way they practice.

Outside of the fucking or fighting, Trackerbees have ALWAYS been able to understand each other and hear each other out when it comes to their respective gods or religion as a whole. They both have different perspectives to offer, different work ethics, and different wisdoms to share the other because there ultimately is a bigger picture. These young women are both incredibly wise.

They’re also messy ass teenagers! Those bigger, more introspective, and worldly questions will be interspersed with a low blow or two. But it’s a low blow because there can be some truth to it. Focusing ONLY on the low blows and using that to paint whoever you like less as a bad person gets you nowhere. It kinda does a disservice to the story telling when you paint it sooo one note bc Brennan and Ally do SUCH a good job at drawing out the complexities of their relationship. The infatuation, The toxicity, the hurt, the gratitude, the frustration, the support, and the love. All of it.

#whenever they talk there’s discourse about one of them being rude #look me in the fucking eyes and tell me you haven’t said some rude shit to your ex before I dare you 👊#they are teenagers that broke up they’ve hurt each other they’re not always gonna be nice #I respect that they’re comfortable enough with each other to say the rude thing and then still want to lean on eachother and love eachother #there’s so much nuance to their relationship on so many levels #these ladies fascinate me and I’m not gonna villainize either of them bc if you blanket paint someone as shitty bc you didn’t like how they #phrased something the world gets a lot smaller #your circle gets a lot smaller #this is fully coming from personal experience #I have been the upset person that took digs at their ex before #I have been the person that cut people off bc they said something I don’t like #I know there are a wide spectrum of ages in the fandom but a lot of the posts that blanket call someone awful skew younger #it’s not a bad thing it’s just.. very tunnel visiony and very black and white #dimension 20 #fhjy

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silvershiningtarot · 5 months

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PAC: What Happened In A Past Life With Your Spouse? Pt1

Disclaimer: This is about a past life between you and your celebrity crush and I'm going to make a part 2 if you are destined to be with them in this lifetime. So remember this is a general reading and I know some y'all know these. Other celebrities. Let's dig in and see if you have a past life with these people. Take what resonates and leave the rest. This is Four Piles. Breathe and out and meditate on these piles.

https://www.patreon.com/Silvershiningtarot

Pile 1: Okay, either you or they embody a lot of feminine energy. I think you or they were very independent. I sense you met them at a wedding. A few of you probably met your Spouse you at a wedding that's what I'm picking up. But oh yeah!! I'm getting a sense this could've been your Yang and you were the Yin or it could be the opposite around. Either way, their energy was strong 💪 I'm sensing. I have a feeling either you or they went off to war. Why am I feeling a family member went off to war like the Army? They had to fight for their country. I'm getting that either you or your spouse was upset about it. Okay, either, you or your Spouse got cheated on. I see that it could've been you while your husband/wife went off to war. Or they dealt with someone who cheated on them. It does suck. But remember you are not in that past anymore. I'm hearing a lesson learned. Ahh! An ex put a curse on them so this curse is probably brought over in this lifetime. Or this curse has been following them or you for a long time. Your spouse is part of y’all soul tribe! This is your soul family and they are yours. I think this was your best friend and I am not sensing that you guys did each other bad. Even if you two did, I do feel that you two dealt with it. Both of you made peace with it. What did I say!? Masculine Energy. This was a very yin and yang vibe between you and your Spouse. Or you/your Spouse might of embodied a lot of masculine energy. Honestly, I sense that your husband was the wild one. That is what I'm picking up. Whenever you went off to work your husband took care of the household. So I've noticed that there seems to be a healing connection here in this past life. Don't worry we will go in a little further than this. Ohh! I think that Celebrity Crush (FS) deals with EA (Emotional Abuse) so they kinda traumatized them or you got traumatized by that. I feel this vibe that this kindred spirit helped you. Or vice versa. Some of y’all celebrity crushes that you dealt with in that life before incarnating down here seems to be wasn't so bad. I get this feeling y'all didn't do anything bad to each other. I can feel it strongly. You guys didn't do anything to each other. Of course, you two had y'all ups and downs. I felt a normal vibe for a pile. I'm hearing a song in my head for this Pile. Both you and your FS are star-crossed lovers I noticed that and I feel that. You two are connected to the stars ⭐️. Teenage dream vibes, you two were like teenagers.

Pile 2: Oh snap, 🫰 I think that some

Of you met your true love ❤️ in the past life. The second you met them you two activated each other. Both of you have a spiritual bond. It’s like you both find each other. I feel that your spouse was a female and you were the male and your spouse became a mother. Yeah, this was your true love and this was a once in a lifetime. You've met them at the right time. Again, I was right! The roles were switched in a past life. But I sense that your spouse was the female and they became a mother. Both of you had a fairytale connection, I feel that you two are meant to have it again. But that's pt2 of something else. Anyway, I feel like a few of you married your true love and it was happiness and wish fulfillment. I feel that your spouse was obsessed with love or you could've been obsessed with love. This makes me think that your person 👭 was a hopeless romantic kind of person. Feminine Energy! This reminds me of Pile 1 in a sense. I think that your Spouse always makes themselves pretty for you whenever you come home from work. Soul vibration I feel that this true love was your soulmate. I wanna cry 😭 in this pile. Because this is so beautiful no matter what you guys stick together. I feel that you got them and they got you. It's that the second you see your Spouse you fall for them deeply. That's amazing to me. I think you or your spouse was a priest or priestess. I think that your spouse or you were Spreading their spirituality to the world. I feel that both of you activated each other. I'm talking about opening each other's 3rd eye chakra. I am hearing “meant to do it again.” again, whoever this celebrity spouse is whoever you're thinking about or feeling then in this lifetime it's meant to happen again. If this happening for y'all then tell me what happens because OMG 😱 so beautiful. WHAT DID I SAY!? So beautiful, soulmates this could be your high-vibe soulmate 🤭🤭💋. This is your perfect match. Both of you give each other safety, security, and comfort. I keep hearing “Meant to do it again.” Your true Love coming back down in this life. But this is a past life. That's a song I've heard in my head.

Pile 3: Marriage Union. I feel in a past life you and your spouse switched roles. Where you were the male and your spouse was the female. I think that you two overcome a lot of hardship between you and your spouse. I think you two finally have your victory. For a few of you, I think that you or your spouse was sort of a player. I heard “not them.” I’m guessing that you never hurt 🤕 your spouse like that. I feel those were your past mistakes. It is like when someone meets their spouse they stop all the childish games. That's how I feel about what happened to you. Wow, that's amazing you two activate each other. I feel that you both have a 5D connection and yes, of course, you guys are starseeds. See! I was right, look at those past mistakes! You've done in the past are over now. I feel that your spouse helped you humble you down. I feel very proud of this pile 3. Especially, the piles with y'all celebrities' crushes. Give yourself around applause 👏🏽. I was right! Both of you switched roles. They could've been your neighbor, teacher, or a student in a past life but it is something important. I feel this curse tried to break y'all apart but nothing stands in y'all way I mean nothing. You two stay together for a very long time. Aww! I did get that one aha! High school sweetheart. I feel both of you dealt with unrequited love for a long time until you met your true love and I feel that you're meant to do it again in this life. Don't get me wrong everything is free will but I feel that no matter what you two are magic 🎉 I mean magical souls.

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stuck1nthelimbo · 6 months

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im so normal about them — 📌 post | masterlist | ko-fi

4 》(Nipple play) - Gagging - Hickey/biting marks ― Breakup High [Getou Suguru x f!reader]

When Satoru breaks up with his gf, who's supposed to console her other than his best friend, Suguru? And consoling includes more than reassuring words...

TAGS!!! 2.1k, no beta reader, gojo's ex sleeps with his bestie, unprotected/no condom sex, hickeys/bite marks, teasing, licking cum, slight nipple/breast play, pussy drunk suguru lol

pookie, desperate suguru??? who wanted satoru's gf??? since the moment they met??? these two posts are giving me desperate vibes

It’s been a week since he broke up with me, and instead of feeling heartbroken, I can’t believe he had the guts to do so. This ego of mine couldn’t handle being humbled by the man, who asked me out first. After the breakup, to my surprise, the person who lent me a helping hand was none other than Gojo Satoru’s best friend, Suguru Geto. I woke up to a text the following day with consoling words and an offer to hang out with me to keep me company and my mind — occupied. I took midnight walks with Suguru, divulging my worries to him. After a meeting or two, he confessed to having a teeny tiny crush on me since meeting me through Gojo. I wondered how many times he had jerked off to the thought of me.

“Still can’t wrap my head around it,” I scoff, crossing arms over my chest, one leg over the other, and lean back in a chair while a raven-haired male brews coffee in the kitchen. He doesn’t turn around, merely throws a glance over the shoulder. Tied-up hair subtly bounces around, the bangs dangling about.

“Come on, don’t look into it too much,” he doesn’t sound reassuring, just annoyed with the repeating topic. I’m preoccupied studying his back, he hums some lullaby. The outline of his broad shoulders is visible through the plain white shirt; He has awful timing in choosing gray sweatpants. Or if we take into account that he was expecting me to show up at his flat, he is perfectly aware of how to create a ‘comforting environment’ for a person with a broken heart.

“He broke up with me and still cannot leave me alone. We hang out so much,” Geto thinks he can click his tongue without me noticing. As he turns around, I spot the paper-thin line his lips have formed.

“You guys still hang out?” he huffs.

“Remember when I was texting you the other night?” I refer to the event a few nights ago. He gently places the cups filled with piping hot coffee on the table and raises an eyebrow in anticipation of an answer. “I went to his place, we drank,” I hesitate to mention the affair that took place, “and then had sex. I texted you while he was asleep beside me,” the change in his facial expressions is apparent: the soft gaze turns into a mean glare in a split second. He clutches the cup handle between his thumb and index fingers.

“Don’t you have any self-respect?” He sneers before bringing the coffee cup to his lips.

“Why? Cuz I sleep with my ex?”

“Exactly,” he leans forward, hissing through his teeth as if we’re surrounded by people in his empty apartment. “You’re sleeping with a man who broke up with you, still clinging to him,” I have my reasons, “Any man would gladly sleep with you.” In response to his indignant comments, I also lean, keeping my face a centimetre from his.

“I’m not clinging to him, just looking for a replacement,” I sip my coffee, basking in its deliciousness until I notice the glassy stare Suguru’s giving me. Head hanging low, he observes me from under the furrowed brows. I think he’s mindlessly upset with me until the contrast between his large cold palm and my warm thigh snaps me out. Those long fingers bluntly dig into my supple flesh. He has never been this bold.

“And I said, any man would eagerly take Satoru’s place, ok?” alluding to the availability in the middle of the conversation, the sheer confidence in his moves prowls a shiver up my spine, “You don’t need to beg…”

“Who would take his place?” the tension in the room can be cut with a knife. His mouth noticeably agape, his eyes hungrily wander all over me, making my skin tingle with excitement. Their final stop is around my lips. Before he’s finished daydreaming, I grab his face, squeezing cheeks and leveling his eyes with mine, “who?”

“Oh, you know damn well,” he mutters through puckered lips; My heart drums in my chest when his eyes scurry across my face, his lips pouting stronger as I grasp his face. My unoccupied hand lingers around his stiffened shoulder, sensing the muscles gradually strain under the path of my fingertips.

His jet-black eyes stare unfocused, stunned, as both arms envelop my waist, open palms firmly press on the back, pushing me onto his lap. Geto’s hot breath spills all over my jaw, goosebumps prickle it, and his coffee-stained lips skim along the skin. The caution in his moves thins out my patience.

“I can fuck your brains out better than him,” he mumbles against my ear, securely holding me against his lap and shoving the pants-straining erection onto me. How long did he wait for this opportunity? A large hand swats my ass, I wince at the sensation and glance over the shoulder; His digits dig into the flesh, gliding under the fabric of my shorts, until the tip of his middle finger brushes against the underwear. I hold my breath, shifting attention to the hand that eagerly kneads my pliable ass cheeks.

“Geto,” I fake a protest, attempting to distance myself from him, but his arms bind tighter around me; He groans at the sound of his last name: I make it sound so formal, meanwhile my hips instinctively roll on his lap with legs spread apart.

“Don’t call me that,” he objects with a weak pout. I lean back as far as possible, hold his face between my hands, and goad him.

“Suguru,” I've never referred to him by his first name; His eyes luster, one hand sinks further into the supple flesh of my ass, the other sidles through my hair and forces me into a greedy kiss. His tongue slithers into my mouth, lapping against mine. Steamy fog clouds my judgment, dissipating the remaining scraps of thoughts as I cling to him, throwing arms over his shoulder and linking fingers behind Suguru’s head. He breaks the kiss, short-winded, lips glistening with thin threads of saliva.

“Say that again,” his eyes glued to my lips, he babbles. I repeat, enunciating each syllable of his name. He leaps to his feet and hurries to the bedroom, I lock my legs around his waist, preventing myself from slipping off of him. Blindly swinging open the bedroom door with an open hand, his mouth feasts on my neck with vehement hunger, scattering violet blotches across my shoulders and throat.

I ease the locked legs behind him, slump back onto the bed, and throw arms in the air, awaiting him.

He crawls on top, messily yanking clothes off of me, tossing them on the floor. Grabbing the neck of the white shirt, Geto pulls it over his head, before he closes the distance between us: planting light kisses around my lips, he decides to move down, softly tracing down the jawline, neck, and chest. His teeth tug on the perky nipple, drawing whimpers from me. Suguru’s breath on the damp skin electrifies my body.

“Fuck, I wanted to do this for a long time,” he speaks under his breath, in hopes that I won't hear it. His hands fumble with my shorts, jerking them off my knees. Suguru’s lips return to adorn my skin with pecks under the navel, while his fingers hesitate to remove the underwear. The digits circle the clit through the flimsy fabric, driving me mad. The pressure’s just right, but the rhythm’s off, making me arch my back.

“Suguru, please,” it doesn’t take me long to whine, I’m impatient, and he snickers against my stomach; His hand reaches for the condoms on the nightstand, and instantaneously I smack it away. He has an unopened box of condoms, so either he has been expecting me to give in or– “It’s fine, just do it,” I croak. My fingers slip between the waistband and his flushed skin, stretching the sweatpants down, followed by his erection springing out: for someone who seems timid and bashful, the girthy cock clashes with his rosy-cheeked face and eagerness.

“Are you sure?” Suguru’s voice wavers, his digits hooking on my underwear, until I slide it to the side without pulling them off, exposing my dripping slit. His ears redden, and the embarrassment seeps into my shoulders when he stares at my nude figure, savoring the sight. I gasp, hold my breath, as the head of his cock nudges against the entrance and feel my inner walls stretch to accommodate him. He’s painstakingly slow, relishing the sensation of a cunt fluttering around him. Suguru’s mouth agape, half-lidded eyes stare into mine, he repeatedly mutters the word ‘fuck’ and I feel some sort of accomplishment. The moment he bottoms out, his groin pressing against me, his head buries in the crook of my neck, “God, I've dreamt about this,” the words slip through his rugged breathing.

With lazy slams, Geto rolls hips, his fingering holding on my thighs for their dear life; My brain decides to shut down: I lay head back into the pillow, close my eyes and fully immerse myself in heavenly passion. Those strong hands hold my hips still, as he shoves his full length inside me, before entirely sliding out and repeating several times. My cunt spasms on Suguru’s cock, I feel the veins running along his manhood throb against my walls, scraping the remaining sanity out of me.

“Fuck, faster,” I beg; He’s here to torture me and atone for my mistakes; Peeking under the lashes, I witness his pathetic expression, furrowed brows, clenched jaw, air whistling through the teeth while his eyes affixed on the spot where we’re connected.

“You’re so fuckin’ good, baby,” the words spill out of him piece by piece, scattering as he rolls his hips vigorously, hands clasped to my sides tighten, gradually bruising the skin underneath the digits; Geto’s arms flex, burly muscles clearly protrude; He rams his cock in me, the sound of damp skins smacking against each other echoes in the room. He leans forward, latching his lips around the perky nipple, sucking it like his livelyhood depends on it. My cunt clings to his cock, and with each thrust, he loses the composure: front teeth gently tug on the nipple, afterwards, he feverishly nibbles on the flesh around it, creeping up til those canine teeth sink into my neck. His hips don’t let up, rutting into my without a trace of coherence.

The rougher he gets, the quicker the ecstatic pleasure builds in the pit of my stomach; Within a minute or two, my finger desperately circles my clit, and the coil of orgasm unravels under the navel, washes throughout every fiber of my being. I attempt to cover my mouth and stifle my moans, but he swats it off, instead his hand holds my jaw, and his lips lock with mine. I helplessly mewl against his tongue.

Geto’s legs jitter, he frenziedly pulls out, to my disappointment, and with a few eager pumps, his palm squeezes the base as the ropes of white creamy fluid shoot on my body. He hoarsely pants, low whimpers sneaking in between the deep wheezes. My legs still tremble from the aftershock.

Spent, Suguru slumps at my side, his arm rests over his forehead, nostrils flare as he regains steady breathing. I prop myself on elbows, line index finger on my stomach, scooping the milky substance on, and smearing it on my tongue.

“What a waste,” the eyes that have been glued to me, widen in shock; The laugh reverberates from his throat.

“Fuck, don’t do that, I’ll get hard again,” Suguru pulls himself up and off bed, tiptoeing to the nightstand on the other side. He hands me a couple of wet napkins, and with one in hand, glides it on my skin. As he’s eagerly cleaning up the hot mess he has created, my eyes burn holes on his face, delighted by the sight. Sculpted jawline, rose-tinted lips, silky black hair curtaining the pale face. Hand reaches under his chin, but the doorbell at the door snatches his beauty away from my fingers.

“You get the door, I’ll clean up,” I insist, crumpling the napkin.

A slim hand turns the doorknob, and to his surprise, the white-haired male grins from ear to ear. Without an invitation, the guest barges inside, leaving the host to hang open his mouth in silent response.

“Did I interrupt anything?” his long finger points at raven haired’s blotched neck with a vile grin. But before long, a smile fades from his face, he turns the head frantically and sniffs around, “the perfume,” his eyes bounce from the kitchen to the bedroom door.

“Satoru,” Geto’s voice breaks, lodges in his throat as Gojo swings the door wide open, only to be left with the sight of me, fully nude, prancing in front of the mirror, neck adorned with Suguru's desperation.

“Suguru…”

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togamest · 1 month

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-> “i’m right in front of you.” (x) — 1,842 words. gn!reader, smoking (w33d), reader wears cherry lip gloss, jewelry, has slight cleavage and tattoos.

Kakucho's jaw aches.

He's been staring at your cherry gloss lips for almost this entire lunch. You'd been yammering on about your recent breakup, talking about how they never put the dishes in the dishwasher and instead chose to place them in the sink, their consistent refusal to cook dinner, their lack of empathy and willingness to do absolutely anything that didn't directly benefit them...honestly, it was a surprise you had lasted this long with them.

The worst part is that, even with all of those things that bothered you, you were still terribly upset about it. Kakucho doesn't miss those nights of you crying into his shirt, wailing about how they didn't care for you at all, about how you knew you were better off without them but why did it have to hurt so much. He almost went through your phone to find the fucker's address and give them a piece of his mind; seeing you so hurt enraged him to the point where he'd see red whenever he left your apartment. It was a fucking miracle he didn't get arrested by doing something stupid to take his mind off of it.

Kakucho didn't answer. He didn't think he had to, and now he has to watch you act completely oblivious to the connection you two clearly had, him being the first person you'd called up after the breakup to take care of you. He'd have done it a hundred times over for you, without ever needing to be asked—

"Kaku."

He jerks up, looking over at you. There's an expression in your eyes that he's never seen before; it's close to worry, or anxiety, but it's mixed with something unidentifiable, before it's gone in a flash. "Huh?" he responds, not knowing what else to say, and you scoff, taking a sip from your matcha latte. "You know," you say to him, a laugh on your lips, "if I'm boring you that much, you can just go back to work. I know I keep going on about it, it's my fault—"

"It wasn't."

"What?"

Kakucho's nails are digging into his palms as he rises, his fists practically shaking as he rests them on the pretty glass table in front of you, looming over you. His shadow engulfs you, and for a moment, his brain goes to a dark, dark place before he wafts the thoughts away as quickly as he possibly can.

"You know it wasn't your fault. Why do you keep saying it is? Why the fuck do you still care so much about this bastard?"

His voice is beginning to rise in volume, but you don't flinch away from him. In fact, you sit there, looking at him with a face of defiance, just like when you were kids and he'd steal your toys to see if he could get a rise out of you. You never gave in to him, digging your heels into the sand of forward progression, taking the toys back when he was finished with them. You never yelled at him, or fought, or got angry at him. You simply took it right on the nose, standing tall and fierce.

It's the one thing he loves the most about you.

You don't respond to him at first, before sighing and looking down at your latte, your fingers tight around the plastic. You give him a nod, before returning to look at him, and you look tired. Your tone is defeated as you respond to him, and it breaks him just a little.

"I know. I know, I know. You're right; you've always been right, Kaku. I know."

He almost loses it right there, hearing you tell him that he's right. Yeah, just not right enough to be with you, I guess, the sinister voice in his head whispers at him. He shudders.

"I'm going back to work," he says shortly, grabbing his phone and his things. "We can smoke later if you want, though. Maybe that'll help."

He's left with your laugh as he walks away, doing his best not to look back. If he looks back, he'll lose it for sure.

The rest of the workday really sucks. He's plagued with thoughts of you, in all aspects; thinking about your childhood together, thinking about how your ex treated you, all of the thoughts are colliding together into a horrible kaleidoscope that only stokes his fire. He's worried for tonight; he always is, as he rolls the joint on his dish after getting the text that you're heading over. You're very pliant when you're high, and he can't lose you tonight in a shitty mistake. He can't.

You show up in comfortable clothes; baggy sweatpants, sweatshirt, and a cute beanie over your hair as you wander in, an overnight bag slung over your shoulder. Because, naturally, you'd spend the night; Kakucho has two bedrooms for a reason (unfortunately), and he won't even allow you to consider taking an Uber or driving home under the influence, even if you argue with him that you're fine. He hates thinking that you won't make it home and it'll be his fault.

You make yourself at home on the couch, putting on some gentle lo-fi music, pulling off your sweatshirt and revealing the tank top you have on underneath. Tattoos spiral up your shoulders, dragons and roses and koi fish lineart loud against your skin, and his breath hitches at the necklace you're wearing.

There's a long-standing joke that Kakucho would always get you jewelry; he didn't really know what else to get you for special days or your birthday, but he did know you loved jewelry. This particular necklace was probably the most thought he'd put into a gift; it was a thin silver chain, with your birth flower pressed into an incredibly small circle of glass, rimmed with silver.

That, and it's resting dangerously close to your neckline, your cleavage just enough to be suggestive.

He shakes his head as he watches you reach for the joint, choosing instead to chuckle as he joins you on the couch. "Gettin' ahead of yourself, yeah?" he rumbles, and you look at him with surprise, mischief bright in your eyes. "Sorry," you say, not sorry at all as you hand the joint to him to light, "forgot my place, I guess."

As he lights it, he shakes his head, blowing the smoke into the space between you two, watching it change colors with the LEDs behind his TV screen. Pink, purple, red, yellow...

"Never. Jus' messin' with ya, promise."

You both relax into the couch after a few hits, and eventually, your head lands on his shoulder as you both watch some sci-fi animation that you'd been into for the last few weeks. It's trippy, interesting; it's a bunch of short animated videos, some lasting a few minutes with others going up to ten to fifteen minutes. It's cool, but Kakucho's barely paying attention to what's on his screen in favor of what you're doing next to him.

Your head is resting on his shoulder, yes, but your hand has moved to his thigh. It's dangerous, the movement; your touch alone almost makes him jump as his jaw sets once again. Someday, he's going to grind his teeth into dust from making sure he doesn't overstep his boundaries with you, not wanting to risk what you two have. And besides, it's too soon after your breakup to even consider dating, even Kakucho knows that—

And then you sit up, your teeth nibbling at your bottom lip as you look at him. He tightens up, mostly due to the fact that the way you're looking at him is so, so similar to the way you looked at your ex. Similar, but not the same. There's something else there, something that's close to passion, or maybe obsession. "What?" he croaks out, his hand accidentally coming to rest on your hip, his thumb brushing against your exposed skin. There's a shiver from you then, from his calloused hands touching you, so softly and gently, and the threads that are holding Kakucho together feel like they're snapping with every second that passes.

"Can I kiss you?"

The request is innocent, your big doe eyes looking at him so hungrily that he can't help but breathe a gentle yes, and your lips are on his own so quickly that he almost doesn't register the movement at all, only the emotions that flood his body after, the aforementioned strings all snapping apart. The line has been crossed, but...

...he doesn't mind.

Kissing you was like nothing he'd ever felt before; he feels like he's floating on clouds, weightless. All his worries and stress and tightness has smoothened out. It was like he'd been wandering in a desert, hoping and praying for relief and receiving none, and finally he stumbles upon a beautiful oasis. That's you; you are the oasis to him, so beautiful and sweet and tasting like cherries and all the things he loves the most about you. His hand comes up to cup your cheek, and you moan into his mouth, and he almost forgets how to breathe.

"Fuck, you taste good," he whispers against you as he maneuvers you on the couch deftly, resting your back against the comfortable fabric of the couch as he hovers above you, his lips just centimeters from your own. You hum, a giggle escaping your lips, and it's the sweetest sound he's heard in a long time; longer than he'd like to admit.

Somehow, someone out there has blessed him with an angel in his presence. The one thing he's wanted for so long is stretched out in front of him, but he's hesitant.

"Are you sure you want this?" he says softly, moving a little further back so he can look directly at you. Where he expects rejection, there's something much softer when both of your hands move to hold his face within them, your palms pressing against his cheeks as you nod your head. "Yes," you say simply, and when he raises an eyebrow, you sigh.

"It was always you, Kaku. I should've seen it, I should've noticed. You were always right in front of me. Whenever I needed someone, you always made time for me. You always wanted me to be happy, and I—"

"I can make you happy if you'll have me," he blurts out, before blush flushes his face, his cheeks hot as he attempts to look away, "b-but it's fine if you don't, I'll be fine—"

"Shut the fuck up and kiss me, Kaku." Your tone is exasperated, but there's a pretty twinkle in your eyes as you smile at him. Like an angel.

He dives down into you again, his heart swelling. For now, it's just you and him. Maybe this will come up tomorrow, maybe this will be a mistake that you'll regret, and if that's the case, Kakucho will live. But if you'll have him, he thinks to himself as he moves down to press open-mouthed kisses to your neck, your whines filling his ears and only spurring on his movements...he'd be able to die a happy man.

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#kakucho x reader #tokyo revengers x reader #tr #ari's autographs

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bi-disaster-yn · 2 years

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The Dustin Henderson Defence League

Pairings: Steve Harrington x Henderson!fem!Reader; brother!Dustin Henderson x sister!Reader

Summary: Reader joins forces with her ex, Steve to put a stop to her brother, Dustin being bullied. If they work so well together as a team - then why did they break up?

Warnings: Steve getting punched (shouldn’t really be a warning if you’ve watched the show).

A/N: Thank you so much for the 500 followers! That’s insane and I never expected this. Thought I’d spice things up and add Stranger Things fics to my Masterlist. This fic (and all future Steve fics) is dedicated to my best friend who adores Steve. She always lets me rant and rave about my favourite fictional characters and is the only person I trust in real life to know I write fics! This one is for you, chika. You know who you are!

Fuelled by incandescent anger, you barged into the mall and stormed your way to Scoops Ahoy. You were a soldier marching into battle as the adrenaline surged through your veins. Armed with evidence in the form of a note that was crumpled and digging into the palm of your hand, you were ready to make your case.

Once you reached your destination, you gave Robin a slight nod as you charged towards the staffroom door. Robin smirked and didn’t stand in your way; secretly hoping that you were here to berate Steve for something and spice up her boring Wednesday afternoon. However, you weren’t here for Steve. You had come for Dustin.

Dustin sat playing with his hands in the backroom of Scoops on the table, his legs swinging off the edge of it as he nervously detailed his account of events to Steve. When you barged in through the door, it drew both of their attention to your furiously trembling form.

“Oh shit.” Dustin muttered, suddenly regretting his course of action in confiding in Steve.

“Dustin Henderson! We promised we would tell each other everything! Now I have to find out you’re being bullied by a note?” You basically shrieked and slammed the note down on the table next to him that had inscribed on it all sorts of threats from his bullies.

“And to make things worse,” you continued, oblivious to how Dustin had looked at you in wide eyed terror. “You came to Steve fucking Harrington before me!” You gestured to Steve – your first acknowledgement of your ex-boyfriend since you’d arrived – who stood awkwardly, folding his arms over his Scoops uniform as though he was embarrassed that you’d seen him in it.

“Hey, look, Y/N, I get you’re upset but-“ Steve started but you cut him off.

“Shut it, Harrington!” You snapped and directed your attention to Dustin. “Well? What do you have to say for yourself?”

“First of all, don’t speak to Steve like that. Second of all, how did you even get that note?” Dustin challenged, sitting up straighter and feigning confidence with all his might.

“I was helping mom out by doing the laundry and found it in the pocket of your jeans!” You responded quickly and gave Steve an apology in the form of a pursed lip nod, accepting that you had been too sharp with him. Your rapid response dragged Dustin’s confidence from him and his shoulders slumped again, feeling ashamed that you had found out about the terror that awaited him at school every day.

Steve picked up on Dustin’s hesitation and decided that whether you liked it or not, he had to step in.

“You’re right, Y/N, he is being bullied. If it makes you feel any better, he tried to make it out like it wasn’t a big deal to me either when clearly it is,” he took the opportunity to look at the note and then gave Dustin a stern side eye. “I think he just didn’t want to worry you since you’re going off to college soon.”

The comment did not in fact, make you feel any better. It made you feel worse. It was already preying on your mind that in a mere month’s time you’d be on your way to college, leaving your mom and Dusty behind. The concept terrified you already but knowing that Dustin was beginning to substitute you with Steve as a way to mentally prepare for your departure was heart-breaking.

You had to take action.

“Dustin, who did this?” You asked. “And don’t you dare lie to me.”

“The same kids as before.” Dustin sighed, realising it was futile to continue hiding things from you at this point.

“Right. I’m gonna finish this once and for all.” You stated plainly and made your way out of the staffroom, outfitted with a new purpose. You were going to prove to Dustin that it should be you that he came to with anything that bothered him. Not your ex.

You knew the kids he was talking about; they were the same ones that hung around outside the arcade and terrorised Dustin and his friends when all they wanted to do was play video games. They were a couple of years older and were all brawn, no brain. Dustin, Lucas, Will and Mike never stood a chance against them.

The thoughts in your brain ran wild as the list of possibilities of how you could handle this circulated round in it. Just the thought of laying eyes on one of those little shits was making your blood boil and your feet drove further and further into the ground as you charged towards the arcade.

It wasn’t long before you were interrupted by a hand grabbing your arm and stopping you in your tracks. In amongst your internalised rage, you hadn’t even registered that Steve had followed after you. He had pulled your wrist and spun you round so that you had come face to face with him.

Annoyingly, his eyes staring back at yours still made you feel vulnerable and somewhat soft. If you didn’t have a mission to attend to then you might have caught yourself staring into them for longer.

“Leave me alone, Steve.” You murmured through gritted teeth and pulled your arm back.

“I want to help! I don’t want you to do this alone.” He offered with a half-smile.

“You’ve done enough.” You retaliated with a huff. There was no way you were going to let Steve swoop in like a white knight and earn all of Dustin’s admiration and respect for what was supposed to be your job. He was your brother and Steve had to accept that.

Steve sighed and put his hands on his hips dejectedly, looking down at the ground as an awkward silence created a discernible tension between you. Whilst it was painful, neither of you felt the need to pull away but instead remained shackled in your respective positions.

“I know you may not like it, but Dustin is my friend and I wanna look out for him. I don’t want to give that up just because we’re not together anymore.” Steve eventually confessed, having taken off his Scoops hat and playing with it in his hands. He was still unable to look up at you. Perhaps if he did face you, he wouldn’t have been able to voice how he was feeling. However, you weren’t feeling quite so sympathetic yet.

“Yes, Steve but he’s my brother! And he thinks the sun shines out of your ass! Do you know how hard it is when I do everything for him and Mom and all he can talk about is you?!” You spat back at Steve, folding your arms and sighing deeply. A lump formed in your throat and frustrated tears sprung to your eyelids. It was downright infuriating to say the least. In the absence of your father, you had basically helped your mom raise Dusty and had always considered you and him to have a close relationship.

That was until Steve Harrington sauntered in with enthusiastic but empty promises of love before leaving you and taking Dustin with him. It stung not being enough for Steve but to be second best for Dustin, that was a killer.

“Hey, I know it’s tough on you guys without your dad, trust me,” Steve gave you a knowing look as he recalled the number of nights you had spent lamenting to him about your horrific excuse of a father. “But you can’t deal with this shit on your own. It’s too much for one person to have to handle all by themselves. Dustin knows that, that’s why he doesn’t want to worry you or upset you. The kid thinks you’re incredible… you are incredible.”

Admittedly, Steve’s words had what was probably their desired effect. It made you pause and digest what he was saying. You physically cringed but you had to agree with him that you couldn’t do this all on your own. You couldn’t gatekeep Dusty either. He had been deprived of a father and whilst you wished he’d picked someone else to be a male figure for him to look up to; Steve was just going to have to do.

“Alright. I guess you can help.” You said softly, without needing to say anymore as Steve accepted your offering of a truce. He might have preferred to hear you’re right, Steve but you weren’t about to give him the satisfaction. Not today anyway.

“Okay, great.” Steve smiled warmly at you. “So, what’s the plan?”

At that moment you realised you had not actually formulated a plan. You had just been charging towards the kids like a raging bull with no strategy in sight.

“I didn’t actually have one?” You bit your lip and involuntarily let out a giggle at your own rashness. A wide smile stretched across Steve’s face as he chuckled with you.

“Okay, I love the enthusiasm, but we cannot just go in guns blazing on a group of kids. We need to be smart about this.” Steve smirked as he churned over his own ideas before eventually looking up at you with such extreme animation that one would expect to see a lightbulb hovering above his head. “Why don’t you punch me in front of them? A little preview of what could happen if they come near Dustin again? Which they won’t because this is gonna work!”

You furrowed your eyebrows at him in disbelief. It would be a lie to say you weren’t at least a little tempted to punch your ex but the very fact he suggested it still came as a surprise. Afterall, didn’t he need that face to win over the girls that came into Scoops for their daily ice cream fix?

“You want me to punch you?” You asked with uncertainty.

“Well, I mean, don’t like knock me out or anything. Just punch me hard enough to scare them.” Steve explained eagerly. As much as you hated agreeing to his idea, you didn’t have a back-up plan to offer.

“Fine.” You sighed. “I’ll try not to hit you too hard.”

“That’s the spirit.” Steve grinned. “Lead the way, Henderson.”

United over a common purpose, you made your way to the arcade together. It was like the old days when you would make the kind of grand entrance into school together that commanded respect and demonstrated authority. Harrington & Henderson: untouchable. Except now when you looked down, your hands weren’t linked nor were your fingers intertwined. All that remained was distance.

Instinctively, you almost reached out to hold his hand but stopped yourself. The earlier vulnerability returned and you decided to fold your arms so that you wouldn’t be tempted to try and reach for him again.

Steve did the same by putting his hands in the pockets of the sailor shorts.

The kids hung around at their usual spot outside the arcade. They fixated on the door menacingly, hoping to trip up any younger kids before going in so that they might steal their arcade money. Little shits.

“Hey!” You yelled as you approached them, gathering their attention. “Do you know a Dustin Henderson?”

“Yeah,” the one who you had concluded was the leader retorted. “What’s it to you and sailor boy?”

Steve’s cheeks turned pink as he smoothed down the top of his uniform with the palms of his hands, suddenly being made to feel self-conscious by a 15 year old. He looked down in embarrassment which was only going to be made worse as you balled your fist and swung a punch at his face.

The punch was much harder than you intended and Steve’s face swung dramatically to the side as he shrieked out a profanity. He held his tender cheek delicately and looked up at you in a horrified but impressed way. You flexed your fist out after its assault and turned back to the group of youths who now stood with their jaws at their feet.

“You go near him, or any of his friends again, and you’ll get the same treatment. Got that?!” You shouted and they all nodded dumbly back at you. “Good. And move away from here. You look like a bunch of creeps sitting outside the arcade!”

They all scurried away from you like pigeons flying from a hungry cat. You couldn’t help but stand a little bit taller with pride as you watched them run away.

“Owww.” Steve wailed behind you, interrupting the internal pat on the back you were giving yourself. “That really hurt!”

“Sorry!” You giggled and turned round to him, thoughtlessly cupping his face in your hands to assess the damage you had done. “You did tell me to punch you.”

“That was before I realised what a mean right hook you had.” He responded with a chuckle before you both locked eyes and realised the intimacy of the way you were holding his face.

You stared at each other in silence. There was so much to say but at the same time, nothing to say at all. You had gotten so used to not touching Steve that the feeling of his cheeks in your palms made your breath hitch uncomfortably.

At the same time, you jumped away from each other awkwardly. There must have been something particularly interesting on the ground as you both dipped your heads to stare at it; careful not to cross the line with eye contact again.

“That was a nice thing you did for Dusty today.” You mumbled as a way to combat the silence, giving credit where it was undoubtedly due.

“Yeah, well, I didn’t just do it for him.” Steve confessed, kicking his heels off the ground.

“Steve, don’t.” You warned, already not liking where this was going. He had looked up at you with forlorn eyes and a helpless expression. This was dangerous territory you were both now entering, especially when you had already promised yourself that you wouldn’t risk getting your feelings hurt again.

“What happened to us?” He asked simply and you were ready to punch him again.

“You dumped me! You said you didn’t feel the same way anymore!”

“Yeah, well I was an asshole.”

“I’ll say.” You scoffed and folded your arms again as though this could barricade you away from Steve. As if this could stop him from getting close and taking a hold of your feelings.

Steve took a few steps forward and put his hands on your arms to hold you in place. When you refused to look up at him, he put his thumb to your chin to tilt your head up to look at him. You swallowed thickly, being forced to stare into his eyes again.

“Yeah, I was an asshole but I’ve grown up a bit. And we make a good team, don’t we? Too good a team to be apart.” Steve pleaded, staring into your eyes for some sort of hint that you were able to meet him halfway. It was a sweet torture having him this close to you again without him being yours.

Maybe it was the way he looked at you. Or maybe it was the way he had allowed you to humiliate him in front of a bunch of kids so that you could defend your brother. Perhaps, it was the way that he looked after Dustin like he was his own brother. It could even have been the way that he’d still tried to make his hair look cool even while wearing that ridiculous Scoops uniform.

Either way, you had lost all resolve at this point and you grabbed his face in your hands to kiss him. Steve’s eyes widened at first then slowly shut as he melted into the kiss, his hands finding their way to your hips and pulling you closer. Your own hands trailed through his signature hair where they belonged.

Pulling back from the kiss, you had to stifle a laugh at the shiner you had left on Steve’s face starting to form. Steve noticed the corners of your mouth stretching into a wide smile and immediately clasped his hands to his face again, fighting the blush that was rising to his cheeks.

“I told you that you had a mean right hook!” He laughed, still feeling a little embarrassed.

“Come on, Harrington,” You held your hand out for him. “Let’s get some ice on that and you can tell Dustin all about how brave and cool you were.”

“Emphasising the brave and cool part.” He agreed, taking your hand. “I missed you.”

“Yeah,” You admitted. “I missed you too.”

#steve harrington #Steve harrington x reader #Steve harrington x female reader #Steve harrington fanfiction #Steve harrington imagine #Steve harrington one shot #stranger things #stranger things fanfiction #Dustin Henderson #Henderson!reader #Joe Keery #Joe keery x reader #reader insert #Steve harrington angst #Steve harrington fluff #ex!steve harrington #Steve harrington x yn #Steve harrington x you #brother!Dustin Henderson

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reimeichan · 1 year

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TW gaslighting and talk of splitting ahead. Pretty personal stuff, delves into shit I went through with my ex.

Been doing some digging and self-examination and... I’m actually fairly certain now that, even if our ex didn’t know for sure if we have DID or not, they sure as fuck took advantage of our dissociative barriers and lack of memory to make us second guess ourselves constantly.

Like, sure, very few if anyone can actually recall in exact detail every single word of an hour long conversation that we’ve had with every single person in our lives. But our ex claimed to be able to do such, and would use that in arguments against us every single time. And due to my own shitty memory, I ended up just taking their word for it every single time. “I thought I told you I’d get it done this evening,” I’d say. And they would say, “No, you didn’t. You said you’d get it done by 6pm. It’s now 8pm.” Okay, so 6pm is still evening. It wasn’t word for word what I said according to you, but I still wasn’t lying when I said evening. And like, stuff like that would constantly happen to the point I’d second guess every single word and every single conversation I’d had with them. I mean, they’d already shown that their own memory was generally better than mine in things that were definitively provable (misplaced items, appointments, etc.), so how could I doubt them during these arguments as well?

And it’s because of these seeds of doubt that started reinforcing those dissociative barriers within myself. And so to please they, I would split parts of myself to do whatever they asked for, because it was easier to just do as they said instead of arguing otherwise. Wash the dishes every day. Make sure the door is locked every evening. Vacuum the floor once a week. Clean the bathroom every other week. I split myself into so many tiny little autonomous parts so that I wouldn’t doubt her, so that I wouldn’t think too hard or feel too upset by her words.... and for what?

I, Cyan, used to be one alter. As my memories return from these parts of myself that I’ve chucked away, I’m certain that back in college, even possibly before then, I was one alter. But something changed once I started living with my ex, and my memory issues got worse and worse, as I constantly split parts of myself off just to please my ex. But even that didn’t satisfy them, because those memory issues also caused problems.

I can’t say for certain if my ex was reinforcing those dissociative barriers on purpose for their own benefit.... but I can definitely say that whatever happened fucked me up as a part really badly. And I don’t even know how many of “me” there are in this Cyan subsystem. It was confusing and upsetting to discover this about myself; I guess to a certain extent, I knew. But the parts of me that knew also hid that from the parts of me that didn’t.... and now I have all these memories and emotions being shared between us, and I’m just trying to make sense of it all.

I loved my ex. I still love them, we’ve been together for so long and they’ve helped me out through so much. But I also hate them. I hate that I’ve turned out like this from living with them for so long. I hate that I’ve been fragmented into all these tiny little pieces and I’m the one who has to deal with putting the pieces back together.

I don’t know why I’m talking about this. I guess... I just needed to vent. It’s been on my mind for too long and I don’t know how to get my thoughts in order.

#actuallydid #actually did #dissociative identity disorder #did #cdd #personal #vent #trauma #tw gaslighting #tw splitting #splitting #gaslighting #fragments #by cyan

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thechaosisgettingexhausting · 7 months

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I betrayed you

im going to treat this like a letter to my friend that I keep continuing to disappoint but I also want to express my emotions to this whole situation as if im writing them a letter. **disclaimer: I am not home wrecking, my friend was never in a relationship with this man... my friend genuinely hated this man's guts a couple months before this incident, slowly they had to build civility because of mutuals**

hello _______,

I truly want to apologize to you about that weekend, I was acting on my own desires and I was not considering that it was your weekend. even after we had a conversation about this situation I continued to pursue him. you made it evident that you did not want me to be associated with him.

I can imagine your discomfort when you saw I was getting along with someone you did not favor, in no way am I trying to make excuses, but I was under the impression that things were getting better between everyone involved. matter a fact I thought if me and this guy got together maybe the tension would dissipate eventually because then I could gossip to you about him, but I can't.

now this is the hard part, I can't say it in any other way but blunt.

I have been seeing him behind your back. I have been seeing the guy that had caused stress in your relationship. I want to ask you for more details on why he was already on your bad side, other than what I already know, but I know you do not even wanna hear me refer to him.

every message, every second I was had with him felt like I was digging myself a deeper hole, I'm hoping this time im not being blindsided because losing you as friend because of a mf would be a big L on me. but I kept going because he is leading me into stability, I found a comfort in him, he even treats me better than my dad...

we've always had ups and downs but my perception of you never faltered until this. I was very compassionate in the beginning because I was slightly aware of my wrongs and I didn't see you as a person that would treat me worse than some of my exes.

you left me in the dark for 5 days. didn't tell me what I did wrong...when I approached you the day I noticed you were acting cold, you brushed me away just like what my dad used to do when I'd try to communicate with him. you gave me a vague hint to the problem.

you to completely holding that clear communication was so immature and emotionally tolling. the things going on in my life at the time had nothing to do with you but you had no sympathy for what I was struggling with. chose to leave me in the dark and let the anxiety fester. I was crying every day for 1 week before this(my ex) and in a complete mental fog for 2 months because of the mental toll the last relationship took on me. for my best friend of 9 yrs, I never thought you'd ever treat me like those men

even at my worst I wouldn't just discard you or degrade you. I would communicate with you so you wouldn't have to overthink and overthink and overthink about what you could do to fix a problem, a problem I wasn't even aware of. ofc I've talked to my other friends about it, keeping all the information as neutral as I could (they could be biased) but they all said that the way this was handled was meant to cater only to your emotions and how you felt. you didn't even gaf about my emotions or anyone else in the situation. when all this time I was tip toeing to not upset you. I was already used to the way you talked to me so only when I recited what you said to me, to my friends, they were in shock. I didn't even realize how harsh your words were until I said them out loud.

with all the things I already had on my plate, you didn't care to ask anything on my perspective, how I was feeling, you showed a smidge of remorse when you said you were worried about me like how you worry about your younger sister. I didn't feel like I had a place to speak at all.

for you to compare this to the moment with that other dude, was very telling to how low you really do view me. you saying "not to slut shame" then proceeds to say "I feel like you would've immediately gone for him if I didn't tell you how I felt about it" you thought that if you didn't communicate to me your discomfort with him that I would've gotten on him, is that not the point of communicating? was I meant to read your mind?

I have made mistakes in the past that we've addressed and fixed. there's no clean way out of this where you'd still have trust for those around you. or even a place where you'd want to be friends with me anymore.

I can't take back what I did that weekend and the following weeks after, I feel like it's selfish to say I don't regret what I've discovered with him. im a coward because I can't put myself to say this to you. me and the guy have been trying to find ways to communicate with you but you made it evident that you want nothing to do with him

I wanna tell you all the good things he's been doing for me. I want to prove you wrong about him. there's so many good qualities about him that I KNOW you'd be highly supportive of. when I broke up with my ex you even said "you deserve someone who will listen to your words and do what they can to make you feel happy and comfortable", now that I have that person I can't even be excited to tell you about it.

I wish you weren't so spiteful, prideful. idk if you refuse to see it or youre just unaware but the main people involved, hate this position. I can't fully blame you on that part because im the one that pursued him. him and I were the ones guilty for pursuing each other looking away from your prominent disfavor.

I've always seen my friends as great people that I trust to be vulnerable with and now I don't even feel comfortable talking to you because I want to address the elephant in the room but I know you'd explode on everyone if I tried to. I feel like I have no place to speak at all. I feel bad for not communicating with you, im always honest with my friends about my life and for me to hold this large part of my life from you because you don't want to see anything else, is beyond frustrating.

to the person reading this on Tumblr: I'm leaving out many things to keep this anonymous so don't assume they're a bad person or anyone involved. I wish I could talk more freely but it would be risking our identities

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hansolmates · 4 years

Text

here comes the bride, all dressed in pride

summary; You and your cousin Doyeon have had beef with each other since the sandbox. When she plucks the last straw, you decide to end your long-simmering fight by claiming that you and her ex—Jeon Jungkook, are now boyfriend and girlfriend pairing; jungkook x reader (f) genre/warnings; fake dating!au, fluff, crack, mentions of cheating, lang, alcohol, mc eats meat, tw sexual harassment, toxic family, dick talk, making out, if u have that one family member that pulls bs on you constantly this is it, this fic is for all the people who have a huge ass family who wont leave them alone w.c; 17.3k a/n: my second fic for gcn’s 23 birthday project! the fact that wedding szn zoomed by us like that... and so bc im sad that so many weddings had to be postponed this fic was born! a huge thank u to vivi @eerieedits / @chillingtae for creating this BEAUTIFUL fic banner and separator pls check vivi out to make your fics all purty

prompts used: “You’ve always been beautiful to me, don’t you know that?” and “I never knew love could be like this, feel like this.”

if you enjoyed this pls consider giving a like and a share💕💕

Doyeon likes to call Jungkook, “the one who got away.”

You like to call Doyeon, “the one who drove him away.”

In secret, of course. In fact, the only person who knows how much you loathe Doyeon and her behavior is your father. And all your co-workers. And your boss. And your boss’ ex-husband.

And Jeon Jungkook, but of course you haven’t seen the man in two years and back then he was far too polite to address his concerns of your hatred of his then-girlfriend.

Okay, so everyone and their mother knows how much you don’t like your cousin. Kim Doyeon and you have had beef since the sandbox, and for whatever reason is always out to one-up you. A strange competitive nature in everything, academics, family, and even boys. The sick, twisted part of you has come to enjoy it. While you’re not a fighter as devout as Doyeon is, you have your own callous tendencies farmed from the seeds Doyeon has planted in your brain. She gives you a comment? You can’t help but throw one back. Since you’re a painfully mature soul you don’t have any mortal enemies as far as you know, Doyeon is the perfect amount of hot water to keep you on your toes.

“I’m really sorry that you couldn’t be a bridesmaid,” Doyeon cooes next to you, swirling her champagne glass with a too-jutted pout, “but if I did there’d be an odd number of pairings and you’re a little too old to be walking as a bridesmaid, am I right?”

Your nails. Are digging. Through your dress. Alas, you’re in public and you have class. Doyeon smiles at you with all teeth, reminding you of the Beldam from Coraline. Aside from that she looks absolutely stunning in that Lirika Matoshi strawberry dress that has her Instagram aching with likes and love from her baseless followers.

“I don’t know,” you reply lightly, leaning back in your seat, “I mean, if Yoojung and Rena can be bridesmaids and they’re three years older than me, wouldn’t I make the cut? It’s okay to be honest and say you just didn’t want me in the bridal party.”

Doyeon laughs, slaps your thigh like you told her the most hilarious joke in the world. Anyone passing by would think you’re best friends. You laugh too, incredulous at the amount of power she thinks she holds.

“Nice party,” you tack on, surveying the room. It’s filled with pastels and beiges, bright and airy. It’s Parisian themed, and while you’re not a fan of theming cultures, you can’t deny that you’re loving the infinite supply of macarons.

“Oh, yes. This is just a taste of the real wedding,” she laces her fingers together, as if she thinks she’s living an Elizibethean love story, “speaking of, you put on your RSVP that you’re bringing a plus one. Am I allowed to know who’s the unlucky date?”

“As if you care.”

“I care if you’re bringing Jimin. That tiny thing nearly gave Aunt Lillian a heart attack when he gave a striptease at Yoongi’s graduation party.”

You smirk softly at the bold memory. That was the plan.

Doyeon sighs dramatically, crossing her legs and popping out a cherry red heel. She plays with the back on the balls of her feet, letting the little pearly rhinestones glisten in the candlelight, “I should really commend you, cousin,” she drawls, “I mean, how kind of you to be so charitable and give your dopey friends a chance to have fun. After all, I’m sure it is difficult for someone like you to find a date.”

It’s no surprise as to how you end up with a date at any family formal gathering. You say you bring a plus one, and then between Jimin, Taehyung and Hoseok. The three of them draw straws as to who gets to gorge on free alcohol and food for that night.

“Difficult?” you arch a brow, “I get plenty of dates.”

Doyeon giggles. She must be feeling extra vindictive today, high on her impending marriage and the taste of bubbly champagne. “By taking turns with those three? You gotta be kidding me,” she snorts, tipping back her crystal, “please y/n. Don’t get so defensive because I’m getting married first. Your time will come. That is, if you stop dicking around with your friends.”

Normally you’d smother any attempt at Doyeon to call out your friends, but now she’s just done that and insulted your ability to get some, and you are livid.

“Actually,” you quip sharply, “I’ve been dating someone. It’s been a couple months, actually.”

“Oh?” Doyeon’s genuinely interested, face falling slightly, “you’ve never mentioned anyone, I don’t see anyone on your social media.”

“Yeah well,” you feign sympathy, pressing your lips together and tilting your head accordingly, “I’ve had to keep it private for a couple of reasons.”

“What, is he ugly or something?” she chuckles, “but really, who’s the person who has the misfortune of being in a committed relationship with you?”

Maybe it’s because Doyeon’s right, the both of you are too old. The two of you have been running around each other for years, with no end in sight. Maybe, the words that linger on the tip of your tongue will be the final nail in the coffin.

“Jeon Jungkook,” you state proudly, clear as day. “Jungkook and I have been dating for three months.”

And you pick up the vanilla macaron that sits innocently on your plate, ravishing it up like it contained all the tension in your table. Between you and Doyeon’s bubble, you could hear a pin drop.

“Jungkook?” her smile is concrete-solid, “my Jungkook?”

“My Jungkook,” you correct, giving her a puppy-eyed look, “I’m really sorry I never told you. I mean, is there ever a right time to tell your cousin they’re dating their ex-boyfriend?” you laugh, either to lighten the mood or because you love the way Doyeon pinches her face, you don’t know.

“How did you two even meet?”

“We reconnected through Seokjin. You know how the two of them play Starcraft together, I just ended up joining the call and he was so funny and nice. We just sorta… felt it.” Doyeon nods like a slow bobblehead, still comprehending in her pea-sized brain, “I just hope it isn’t too awkward. I know it’s been awhile but, if you really don’t want Jungkook to come I can always take Hoseok or something.”

“No, it’s fine,” Doyeon says a little too quickly, masking on her picture-perfect smile. “I’m with Namjoon now, and I’m totally happy. Water under the bridge, it’ll be totally fine.”

“Really?” your eyes practically sparkle, thankful for the amount of glitter and highlighter you’ve dumped on your face today, “I really appreciate it, Yeonie.”

And she quickly downs her champagne glass, and gets up from her seat. It’s haunting, the way she gets up, pink tulle billowing around her ankles. “I have to attend to the other guests,” she says.

“Of course,” you raise your glass.

“But, be careful,” she gives you a little smile, one filled with a last-ditch attempt at a jab, “Jungkook, he’s a little hard to deal with.”

“Oh don’t worry. I know how to deal with Jungkook’s hardness,” you wink, and Doyeon’s face falls like a ton of bricks.

“That’s not what I meant.”

“I know,” you shrug loftily, “that’s what I meant, though.”

And you don’t bother watching Doyeon stomp off the metaphorical stage, double fisting two new glasses of champagne from an awaiting butler as she finds some other poor guest to pick on. Now, the matter of securing your date. Conveniently so, the most important man in the room is walking your way, and you manage to snag his tie just as he passes your table.

“Ow—ow! I’m choking!” Seokjin grabs, nearly throwing his tall body onto your lap, hands grappling to release the tension on his neck. “Leave me alone, woman! I just wanted to get some chicken tenders!”

“Jin,” you say sweetly, opening his blazer to retrieve his phone, “I need Jeon’s number, now.”

“Jungkook?” your favorite cousin pales, eyes widening as you take out your phone of your own, copying down the digits, “what did you do?”

“Don’t ask questions.”

Seokjin says your name again, firmer. “You’re playing with fire.”

“It’ll be fine, it’s the last time,” you quell, already knowing how much Seokjin hates being in the middle of your fights. Once you’ve secured the phone number, you place Seokjin’s phone back into his pocket, patting his breast. “Thank you. You know you’re my favorite cousin, you know that?”

He grumbles a “damn right I am” before stomping away, resuming his race for his chicken tenders.

You: hey jeon it’s y/n. I see you’re doing great, i saw on instagram that you released your first app w/yoongi! Totally amazing, been playing for weeks, really upset that i can’t get past the flaming frog boss :((

You: Feel free to ignore this, i won’t blame you if you do. Im at doyeon’s rehearsal dinner, and she basically snubbed my friends and said i couldn’t get some prime dick even though im?? Me??? Anyway, im tired of her shit so im gonna throw it back at her, one last time before she ties the knot. I told her you and i have been dating, and im bringing you as my date to her wedding. Really sorry, the demons took over my brain and made the worst and best comeback of my life. So… if you’re up for being the hottest couple on the floor in three weeks and showing how madly in love we are, please text me back? Or not. You might think this family is crazy and i accept partial responsibility.

You: I’ll buy u every meal for every practice date we have if u agree.💕💕💕

Jeon Jung-boo-thang: thanks, i appreciate that. To defeat the frog boss, go back to the coconut cave and find the garnet garter. It absorbs his fire and u can easily defeat froggo w any level 15 weapon

Jeon Jung-boo-thang: and as for the real reason u texted me. Im in. let’s get pork belly tomorrow.

Two years ago, you were surprised that Doyeon could manage to snag a man as fine as Jeon Jungkook. Also unsurprised, because Doyeon is gorgeous and could snag any man she wanted, and has snagged every man she wanted.

Jungkook was different though. He had an air of innocence to him. He loved her, a little too much to be safe. Your heart would betray you every time you would find him at a family gathering, making her plate and counting the calories she so meticulously measured. How can someone so sweet be with someone like Doyeon?

Your heart ached for Jungkook when they broke up a year later. From what you heard, Doyeon was Jungkook’s first serious girlfriend. And then you wanted to rip your heart out a week later when you caught Doyeon smooching with her favorite graduate professor Kim Namjoon, wanting to erase any possibility you’d have at love. At that time, you never wanted to feel the pain you imagined Jungkook was going through.

“Y/n! Over here!” you’re a little taken aback at how much has not changed in Jungkook. His eyes still sparkle like fresh dew, his smile is still pearly white and infectious. He’s even early, snagging a table at his favorite barbeque place and waiting for you as if he is the one organizing your first date.

At the same time, there’s so much that’s changed about him. He’s confident, even going so far as to walk over to you and slip your jacket and purse in his grasp like a gentleman. He leads you by putting a hand lightly at the small of your back, making you feel impossibly small in comparison to his Dorito-shaped body, broad shoulders and a deliciously trim waist.

“How was the walk over?”

“Not too bad,” the conversation is casual, easy. You wipe the sweat off your forehead with a napkin. “Could use a little exercise now and again. I did eat a whole tray of macarons at that rehearsal dinner.”

Jungkook laughs from his belly, causing you to smile. “Nonsense. You look great, by the way,” you don’t mind it, actually, you enjoy it when his eyes rake over your body. After all, he’s now your boyfriend and he needs to get familiar with all the important bits. He leans his arms forward, bracing him against the wooden table so his face is closer to yours.

“You’re not doing too bad yourself,” your eyes gloss over the veins and intricate tattoos that paint his muscled upper half. Your smile morphs into a smirk, letting him know you’re enjoying the view just as well as he is.

And as soon as the tension sparks, it ends just as fast when your waiter comes up to light your grill.

“So,” Jungkook wastes no time in decorating your stove, making sure to add all the appropriate aromatics and infusions to season your lunch, “do you know why Doyeon and I broke up?”

“Cheated on you with Namjoon, I assume,” you keep your eyes trained on the darkening meat.

Jungkook slips a piece of meat in his mouth. Any expression of pain (whether it be from Doyeon or the barely cooked meat) doesn’t reveal itself as he stops to take a sip of water. “Who else knows?”

“Just me and Seokjin. The family loved you too much and Doyeon made up some sob story about how you two were going different life paths.”

He chuckles to himself, taking great care in flipping the meat. “I really was a fool in love, wasn’t I?”

“It… was mildly cute.”

“Tell me the truth, you have no reason not to.”

“Okay, you made me want to vomit rainbows and glitter every time I saw you.”

The two of you laugh, faces crinkling shamelessly as the two of you busy yourselves with setting up the table. Most of the food is done and the aroma of fresh onions wafts around your grill. As you place chopsticks on his side of the table, you think about all the times Jungkook made it abundantly clear how much he loved Doyeon: the love letters tucked into her purse, 100 day anniversaries, even just a simple Americano for her in the morning.

“Is that why you never hung out with us?”

“No,” you reply lightly, “Doyeon made it clear that I shouldn’t talk to you.”

Jungkook frowns, “You really don’t like each other, do you.”

You shrug, “Just always been like that,” you quirk a smile when Jungkook places the freshly cooked meat on top of your rice before serving himself.

“So what’s the plan?”

“We go to the wedding, make out a little, get Doyeon boiling. Even if she’s not interested in you, she’d still be upset knowing we are together.”

“And why is that?”

“Because it’s me,” you grin into your glass, staring at a water-stained Jungkook through the blue tinted glass. “And all you have to do, is enjoy your night and look pretty.”

His eyes crinkle, chopsticks pressing between his lips. “You think I look pretty?”

With a roll of eyes you don’t respond, preferring to dig your chopsticks in your rice. No need to inflate Jungkook’s ego too soon.

Pinning the main theme of your hangout to the side, the both of you dig into your meal. You throw conversation back and forth like pebbles, grains of sand that build and build until you’re caught up with each other’s lives. It feels so strange to admit it’s been two years since you’ve spoken to the man, and all of a sudden the once luscious meat feels dry in your mouth.

“Jeon,” you put your chopsticks down, “are you sure you want to do this with me? I mean, I know it’s all my fault and I dragged you into it. Don’t feel obligated to agree to this.”

“I’m a hundred-percent sure,” he doesn’t stop eating, shoving two spoonfuls of rice in his mouth. His cheeks puff up considerably, and your eyes trail down to his neck as he swallows, “I wouldn’t be here if I didn’t wanna.”

“Right,” you don’t need a big explanation or a personal confession from Jungkook, just his consent. “Partners, Jeon?” you hold up your glass.

“Partners,” he agrees easily. The smile on his face disarms you, a full-fledged grin decked with pearly whites. Clicking his glass to yours he adds, “And it’s Jungkook, babe.”

Oh, this is going to be interesting.

Seokjin thinks the two of you are the most boring fake-couple.

His eyes dart back and forth between your spot on the couch and his desk, where Jungkook is currently seated. Seokjin is hovered over Jungkook, who’s typing and clicking furiously over his PC game. You’re on your phone, feet pulled up to the coffee table while some old Netflix movie plays in the background. To top it all off both of you didn’t even try to dress like it’s daytime, nearly matching in sweatpants and an oversized hoodie. It doesn’t look like a couple coming to visit Seokin, it looks like Jungkook is playing video games with Seokjin while his cousin hangs around like she owns the place.

“Shouldn’t you guys like, I don’t know, go on dates or something?” Seokjin feels like he’s talking to the air. “Maybe get to know each other before the big day?”

Pulling your phone down to your lap and Jungkook taking off his headphones, the two of you shrug at each other, “No, we’re good.” Jungkook says.

“We know enough,” you agree cooly, “Jungkook likes Valorant.”

“I do like Valorant.”

“He likes pork belly.”

“I do like pork belly.”

“He’s ripped as hell.”

“I am ripped as hell.”

“Okay but have you guys kissed yet?” Seokjin interjects, probably compensating for the nonchalance in the room with his own brand of freaking out. You two only see each other when you’re hanging out at Seokjin’s apartment, and while he’s happy that you two aren’t doing the whole 9-yards and creating an elaborate scheme, the both of you are almost too relaxed. His anxiety is spiking.

“Yes,” Jungkook answers, “at the barbeque place we went to.”

“It was nice," you tack on, "Jin, we got this. Don't worry."

"How can I not worry when you're trying to upset our cousin on her wedding day?" he's sweating in his fully air-conditioned apartment. “I get that she’s the devil’s spawn and everything, but she’s still a human being.”

“In second grade she pushed me on the treadmill because I was going too slow. I got caught on the roller and got a bald spot for two months.”

“Okay yes one bad example—”

“And in senior year she accused me of plagiarizing her essay just because we chose the same topic. I almost didn’t get into college!” Seokjin sighs, crossing his arms. All valid points, and arguing with you isn’t a route he wants to take. “Jin, the point is that she’s constantly pushing my buttons. I’ve always been the bigger person and now that I’m old and confident I just want one jab.”

“That’s valid,” Jungkook pipes up, pressing the spacebar a few times, “I want a jab too, she cheated on me.”

“See? It’s a mutual decision.”

Seokjin asks, “Why aren’t you more worried about this?”

"Because Doyeon isn't going to chew me out on her wedding day," you checked your aunt's seating chart last week and you are far, far away from the bridal table. "We're just going to show off a little bit. Get drunk, eat some bomb steak. Break up in three months or less.”

"You don't have to just convince Doyeon, it's your entire family! Not to mention you also have to go to the bachelor party!"

"Oh I almost forgot," you reach under the couch for your laptop, "Jungkook, in two weekends from now we're flying to Las Vegas for the bachelor party and wedding. I'll buy your ticket now."

"Thanks, babe!” Jungkook sends a cheeky grin to Seokjin, who is unimpressed. “See? I remember to call her babe.”

“Alright, get out of my house,” Seokjin tugs Jungkook away from his computer, causing the younger man to swivel around in his plush gaming chair.

Jungkook frowns at the monitor, “But I’m still bronze one. I’m aiming for silver one by this weekend.”

“Don’t care. As much as I don’t like this plan, I’m not letting you two slip-up.” Seokjin pulls out his phone, revealing Doyeon’s Instagram story, “Doyeon and Namjoon are at the mall buying swimsuits for Vegas. Go to the mall and ‘accidentally’ run into them.”

You sit up straight, tilting your head to the side. “That’s not a bad idea, actually,” you bound over to grab your jacket, giving Seokjin a big fat kiss on his cheek, “Thanks Jinnie, do you know you’re—”

“I’m your favorite cousin. Yeah whatever, bye.” He waves you off, plopping in his own chair so he can enjoy his games in peace.

“I’m driving,” Jungkook declares, swiping your keys from Seokjin’s opal dish.

“Oh, hell no,” you jump on your tippy toes to reach Jungkook’s grasp on your keys, but he’s so freakishly tall there’s no way you can reach. “I drive my car!”

“I’ve always wanted to drive your car back then,” Jungkook cooes, leaning in so your noses touch. “C’mon, you can trust me.”

“You two are gross already,” Seokjin admonishes from the other side of the room, “see, it’s working!”

Poking his cheek so he gives you some space, you whip your head to hide the flush that burns on your cheeks. “Fine, but if you crash you’re buying me a new one.”

“They’re over there,” you hiss between the racks, shuffling between the plastic hangers to point to Doyeon and Namjoon at the women’s section of the store. They look disgustingly adorable together, with Doyeon pointedly telling Namjoon which swimsuit suits his stature better while Namjoon nods along and goes with whatever she says. You crouch down lower, fearing Namjoon’s tall frame would catch you. “Now we just gotta act all couple-y and they’ll notice us. Or maybe we can walk over to them? What do you wanna do?”

“Do you think we should get matching swimsuits?” Jungkook pays no mind to your sleuthing, holding up a red pair of swim trunks to his thighs, “we could pretend to be sexy lifeguards.”

You tilt your head away from the pair, only because Jungkook has been genuinely interested in this store since you’ve arrived. Putting a hand under your chin, you scrutinize the dark red cutoff shorts. “They’re cute,” you nod appreciatively, “It’ll make your thighs look thick.”

Jungkook’s grip on his hanger lowers, and he regards you with dark eyes. “You think my thighs look thick?” he asks, leaning in and putting one hand on the curve of your waist. His fingers dance on the surface of bare skin between your top and jeans, and while you’ve agreed beforehand that you two could touch each other wherever in public, it still surprises you when gooseflesh rises to the surface.

“Easy there, tiger,” you chuckle, putting a hand on his chest to stop his sudden bout of flirting. “I’m just stating the facts, we get it. You lift.”

“You’re so cute when you try to put your guard up,” he’s brushing noses with you now, and you feel the plastic of the hanger crumple pathetically between you two as the gap closes further. “But you can’t hide from me.”

And just as his lips move to press against yours, a shrill “Jungkook!” echoes throughout the large store.

You nearly flop over the boardshorts rack if not for Jungkook’s arms secured around your waist. Oh right, you think dumbly, this is all for show. Doyeon and Namjoon are right in front of you, purchases already made and looking at you two in curiosity. Well, Namjoon is definitely curious, because you know for a fact that Doyeon speaks very little of you to him and you’ve only conversed with him a handful of times. Doyeon on the other hand, looks a little stiff in the grin.

“Hello to you too,” you remark to Doyeon, who’s barely acknowledged you. You reach over to squeeze Namjoon’s arm, “Hi Joonie,” you crinkle your eyes, and you fight back a squeal when he smiles back with dimples. Doyeon has such a cute fiancé, and if you’re keeping score he’s way too good for her.

Doyeon’s eyes glaze over to where you’ve touched Namjoon, and she links her arms with his. “What a coincidence, you two are buying swimsuits where we’re buying swimsuits.”

“Well, there’s only one mall in this town and we’re going on the same trip in two weeks,” you reply blandly, and you feel Jungkook pinch your side. “Oh, Namjoon. Have you met my boyfriend Jungkook?”

“Can’t say that I have,” Namjoon reaches over to clasp Jungkook’s hand, “nice to meet you, man.”

While Namjoon and Jungkook exchange small talk, you pointedly ignore the waves of negativity Doyeon sends your way in favor of observing the two large men. Namjoon just said it was nice to meet him, therefore he has no clue who Jungkook is. Interesting, considering Doyeon two-timed in favor of Namjoon. It gets you a little antsy, and you wonder if Namjoon is faking this whole interaction or if Doyeon is hiding something.

“Baby,” Jungkook rests a hand on your shoulder, regarding you with concern, “you spaced out there, are you okay?”

“She’s like that, Jungkookie,” Jungkook gently presses your shoulders down, blocking your view of Doyeon as she regards your not-boyfriend as Jungkookie. “My cousin’s a bit of an airhead,” her tone is sweet and jesting, the backhanded jab going right above Namjoon’s head.

“I’m just hungry,” you say, forcing a tight-lipped smile.

“Well, that’s perfect,” Namjoon clasps his hands together, “Yeonie and I were just about to go grab some dinner. Why don’t you join us?”

Doyeon and you both reply immediately, “That really isn’t necessary—”

“Nonsense,” you don’t even have the heart to be upset at Namjoon because he looks so damn genuine, “It’s been two years and I haven’t even bought you a meal, y/n. After all, we’re going to be family at the end of the month.”

“Right,” you answer reluctantly.

“We’re gonna make reservations at the Cheesecake Factory,” he pulls out his phone, ready to make a call, “but you and Jungkook can finish shopping, okay? The wait will be a little long but by the time you’re done our table should be ready.”

You and Jungkook wave off Doyeon and Namjoon as they make their way to the restaurant. Your hand is caught in the air by Jungkook, who regards you with worry in his eyes. “I wasn’t kidding when I said you looked spaced out,” he says, “tell me what you were really thinking.”

Subconsciously, you squeeze his palm for comfort. “I don’t know, it just feels weird knowing Namjoon doesn’t seem to know you at all. Normally Doyeon loves to talk shit about her exes.”

Jungkook scoffs easily, “I mean, if she’s marrying the guy I’m sure she doesn’t want to let him know the details of how they ended up together.”

“True,” you decide to let it go, and follow Jungkook to the register to pay for his swim trunks.

“So,” the little ‘ding’ of the register opens up the money box, and Jungkook quickly hands the clerk his cash, “we’re having dinner with them after this?”

“Only if you want to.”

“We need to, right?” Jungkook thanks the clerk, holding the bag in one hand and threading his fingers through yours as you head out the store.

“Well, do you want to?” you ask again. Jungkook stops the two of you on the sidewalk. It isn’t a fast stop, but a slow down that makes his walk a little more thicker, more deliberate as he trudges you down the lane. You move in front of him, clutching your hands between his. “Are you okay? You barely even acknowledged Doyeon.”

“I’m fine,” you flinch at his harsh tone, and he immediately moves to remedy it by squeezing your hand back. “I’m sorry. It’s just been awhile and I’m definitely over her but,” he bows his head, feeling embarrassed, “she hurt me, you know?”

Going into this is definitely one of the more selfish plans you’ve put your mind to. Your heart pangs thinking about what must be going through everytime he sees her. If he’s reminded about all the good times they shared, or how much he’s over thought every single conversation he’s had with her up until this point.

“Of course,” you completely understand, knowing from the beginning that this whole mess would end up with some dicey feelings someway or another. “I’m just thankful you chose to stick by me. And we can talk about it if you’re comfortable,” both of you being victims of Doyeon’s brand of torture, you hope the two of you can at least be friends after all of this is over, “we don’t have to go have dinner with them.”

“But, Namjoon got us a table—”

“Namjoon will be fine. We can always have dinner with him another time,” you smile softly, “what matters is that you’re okay.”

His gaze melts, and you feel his grip loosen in your hold. He regards you with weak eyes, betraying the confidence he held himself to moments before. “Thanks, y/n,” he says, “I really appreciate that.”

“Anytime,” you reply honestly. “We can go to Cheesecake and order to-go. I can make some excuse about how my stomach hurts and that we should do a raincheck.”

“Sounds good.”

“Do you wanna eat at one of our places or eat at the park or something?” you’re already pulling up your phone, checking out the menu. “We could invite Jin too.”

“The park sounds nice,” neither of you acknowledge the fact that you’re not inviting Seokjin, and for some reason that’s okay.

“Yeah,” you agree simply, “the weather’s beautiful.”

Under any normal circumstances, you would’ve been friends with someone like Jeon Jungkook, easily. A little part of you wishes that you could’ve met Jungkook first, but Doyeon has better connections than you and always had a good crowd around despite her inner motivations. No awkward exchange happens when you suggest to Jungkook to eat together. Even though you’re not technically dating, the two of you know that eating together is better than eating alone.

And you have to admit Jungkook’s great company. The two of you drive to a reserve nearby, overlooking a tiny lake. Instead of a fancy Italian tablecloth the two of you move your car seats down and set a spare picnic blanket in the trunk. Instead of a candlelit dinner the two of you find some emergency electric tealights in the glove compartment, lighting it up between you two as you dig into your to-go boxes.

You’re a little envious that so much time has passed by. You could’ve been a little sneakier and made a better effort to communicate with Jungkook when you saw him regularly at family parties, and maybe you two would have a better friendship today. Nevertheless, the two of you mesh like peanut butter and jelly, exchanging conversation that has your cheeks sore from smiling too hard.

By the time you get to dessert, the moon is out and the stars are floating above your heads. The two of you are at war, fighting with your forks over the last strawberry in your cheesecake slice. After some careful stabbing Jungkook manages to nab it with his fork.

He almost puts it in his mouth, but instead swipes up some whipped cream to press the last strawberry to your lips.

“I think it’s working,” Jungkook says randomly as you chew the sweet fruit, “you could see it on Doyeon’s face today. She’s unsettled.”

“Yeah,” you agree, lying down on the lavender gingham picnic blanket.

“Do you know why she fights with you all the time?”

“That’s a question I’ve been asking myself since the dawn of time.”

“I think I know why.” Jungkook looks down at you with his large doe eyes, licking innocently on a spoon of whipped cream.

“Pray tell.”

“She’s jealous of you.”

“No,” you disagree easily, “she’s jealous that I have you.”

“Bzzt! Wrong,” Jungkook puts his empty container in your makeshift trash can, falling beside you and knitting his hands under his head. You have a little window on the roof of your car, so both of you are able to stare at the navy sky, “she’s always been jealous of you. Think about it. The two of you have similar lifestyles: same career path, confidence, taste, education. But even after all of that? People still like you more.”

You scoff, hands immediately reaching to fiddle with the frayed corner of fabric next to your fingers. “I don’t think so.”

“I’ve met all of Doyeon’s friends,” he informs you, “they’re weird. Like yeah, they care about each other on the surface level. But they’re nothing of substance. They’re not like your friends.”

“Please, Doyeon has everything she could ever want,” you don’t know what kind of complex you have supporting Doyeon’s life, but something deep and insecure wants to separate you two as far away from each other as possible. “Like… she’s Malibu Barbie and I’m Polly Pocket.”

Jungkook turns to face you, resting his head between his palm and leaning on his elbow. “Do you not think you’re beautiful?”

“Yeah, but compared to Doyeon—”

“You’ve always been beautiful to me, don’t you know that?”

You choke on your saliva, feeling small and skittish at the implication behind his words. It’s been two years. You’ve only been friends for two weeks. How can he possibly say that?

“I uh, saw you once,” Jungkook coughs, and you watch the way his pale cheeks unmatch the moon and instead flit to a crimson hue, “we were at some party and you were wearing this really cute black dress with a white bow in the middle. Doesn’t even matter what party because it was random, y’know? I was gonna go talk to you but Doyeon got to me first and well, the rest is history.” He breaks eye contact with you, unable to handle it.

You remember that party, vaguely. It was random, some sort of poetry slam in a shady part of town. Doyeon and you didn’t even go with each other, you were with Taehyung and she just happened to stumble in there from another nearby party. You didn’t even know Jungkook was there that night, or how you were a hair's breadth away from meeting him before Doyeon.

“Don’t ever think you’re lesser than her just because out of all the people she chose to pick on, she chose you. It’s why she never lets you get to know her boyfriends. She’s threatened by you because you’re just as special,” something low sparks in your chest at his words, “and now that you’ve finally decided to stoop to her level and fight back with a taste of her own medicine, she doesn’t know what to do.”

Feeling like your body is on a beach and you’re sinking in sand, you soften over your picnic blanket, mulling it over. “Did I make the right choice? Stooping down to her level.” Your voice is quiet, comparable to the chirping birds and buzzing gnats outside.

“We won’t know until after the wedding,” Jungkook answers honestly, “but I do know I’m sticking with you until the end. We’re friends now, got that? You have no excuse to ignore me anymore.”

You don’t want to ignore Jungkook, never in a million years. Now you know that you are envious of Doyeon, for having an opportunity to love and care for an amazing person like him. So in a sudden bout of emotion, you roll over to straddle Jungkook’s waist.

He’s shocked, hands flying to your waist to make sure you don’t wobble off. But you’re determined, and lean down to press your lips against his. He tastes like cheesecake and strawberries, the taste melding with your own as you relish in the feeling of his soft lips against yours. You melt a little when he squeaks, breaking into a soft moan as he reciprocates the gesture. He’s warm and large and he makes you feel safe. Once your brain returns to your body, you break for air. You only pull back a few centimeters, and there’s no way for you to get off because Jungkook has locked you in place.

“What was that for?” he asks breathlessly.

“Don’t know,” you’re whispering against his lips, unable to pull away, “just felt like we needed a little more practice.”

He blinks, before relaxing in a silly smile. “I agree,” he says simply, dipping you on your back so he can be on top the second time around.

“We’re in Vegas, baby!”

Every single terrible comedy movie set in Las Vegas has brought you to this very moment. You’ve always wanted to say that line. Dumping your luggage next to Jungkook’s, you flop on the nearest mattress. Thank goodness you only wore leggings and a t-shirt on the flight, it’s the optimal sleeping outfit after a long day. Feeling something hard and plastic dig into your brain, you hold up the culprit and squeal excitedly. “Look, Kook!” you wave the crinkly confection in your hands, “they put mints on the pillows!”

Despite your room being a square with two queen beds, the hotel does not skimp on quality. The decor is ornate, the white and gold trim on the doorknobs and metal appliances shimmering beautifully. The beds feel like clouds, as you try to imagine what a cloud could possibly feel like, this is it.

Jungkook immediately follows suit, ripping off his outer clothes until he’s left in his undershirt and boxers, flopping next to you on the mattress. He immediately opens his mouth when you shoot a mint, catching it easily. “I feel like we’re in a deleted scene of Crazy Rich Asians,” he says, letting the hard mint clink around his teeth, “is this the part where you tell me your family comes from old money and I’m gonna be your sugar baby?”

“Don’t be so hopeful,” you narrow your eyes, booping his button nose with your finger.

“I’m just saying, the first class flight threw me off.”

You giggle, slapping his chest, “No. If that was true, we wouldn’t be sharing a room with my cousin. Sorry you have to share the bed with me, I got the hotel with Jin and he doesn’t want to sleep with you.”

“S’okay,” Jungkook replies softly, leaning closer to make grabby hands at you, “you’re softer.”

Tentatively, you scooch over so you can lean on Jungkook’s chest. You two have a little time before Doyeon and Namjoon’s combined bachelor and bachelorette party. The past two weeks have been nice—scratch that, the past two weeks with Jungkook have been wonderful. You never cared to measure how much time passed before meeting him, but now that you’ve begun fake-dating, time is the only thing you regard. You’re already beginning to miss him, knowing that in a week, this whole arrangement will be over.

Well, not exactly over. Jungkook says you’ll remain friends after this, but you don’t really want that. You want more, and it scares you to think he may not feel the same.

But right now you’re snuggling like an old couple, sleeping comfortably between pillow-like sheets and minty breath. Your pretend boyfriend, now your pretend boyfriend with benefits, looks soft and huggable and you want to bottle up this moment forever. You say benefits because, well, the cuddling is an added bonus. Practice practice practice, Jungkook sing songs the words you used that one night under the stars, excuses to seal his lips to your lips. You’ll never argue with that. So when Jungkook’s hand tightens around your waist and pulls you closer, you relent.

One second, you’re closing your eyes and the next, you’re waking up to Seokin’s wide eyes staring back at you.

“Eep, you creepo!” you shriek, scrambling away from him. That’s when you realize Jungkook’s missing from bed, the scent of his laundry detergent lingering between the eggshell Egyptian cotton.

“Jungkook’s in the shower,” Seokjin immediately reads your mind, pulling away so he can unpack his luggage. “My flight just got in two hours ago, you both were out like a light when I arrived.”

“Ugh, I’m really not ready to party.”

“Doyeon just texted the family group chat. She reserved the rooftop, the party starts in an hour,” he talks mindlessly, rifling through his stuff. Seokjin is fiddling with his clothes, despite the fact that you know Seokjin prepares his outfits days in advance so he doesn’t have to choose. He looks concerned, pulling out a flamingo pink boardshort and setting it down on his mattress. Finally he says, “I’m worried about you.”

“Why?”

“Because. It’s clear that you’re starting to fall for Jungkook.”

The words strike you straight in the place you’re trying to avoid. You’ve been living in a fantasy these past two weeks, thinly veiled by the whole reason you two are together in the first place. Doyeon’s wedding is just around the corner, and what then?

“I’m not saying that he doesn’t feel anything for you either,” that gets your heart skipping a beat, and you secretly hold a hand to your chest under the blankets, “but do you really want to start off a relationship like this? A relationship all messy and morally objective because it’s built on revenge?”

“Don’t worry about me,” the words easily fall from your lips, “I can take care of this.”

“I hate it when you say that,” the words are curt and harsh against Seokjin’s plush lips, “I’m allowed to worry about you, y/n. You know why? Because, because you’re my favorite cousin too,” he bites his lip, walking over so he sits on your side of the bed. “So don’t tell me what I can and can’t worry about. I want you to be happy, I want you to stop holding in this anger you have for Doyeon and move on.”

“I’m sorry,” you whisper, leaning over to press your cheek against Seokjin’s shoulder. “You’re right.”

“For the first time in a long time, you’ve finally decided to lean on someone,” and both of you know who that someone is. “I don’t want you to lose him over some petty family issue. You should tell him how you feel.”

“I will,” you wrap your arms around your cousin’s slim waist in a silent thanks.

“Am I interrupting a tender family moment?”

The two of you pull away to stare at Jungkook, leaning against the doorframe that leads to the bathroom. He’s in a plain white t-shirt and the red board shorts that you bought at the mall, cutting off mid-thigh and revealing the bulky muscle underneath. You were right, the shorts do make his thighs look thick.

Seokjin groans exaggeratedly. “Yes, yes you did.”

Jungkook immediately goes to replace Seokjin’s spot, and some stray droplets fall fresh from the shower due to his slicked-back hair. “Do you wanna get ready? First party’s soon.”

“Not really,” you admit, “you’re gonna meet the family all over again.”

“Second time’s the charm,” he winked, “I’ve already met your parents and everything. Not feeling nervous at all.”

“Oh, really?”

“Really,” and the facade cools down a little, “well, maybe a little nervous for your Aunt Lillian. Her stares give me the heebie-jeebies.”

“Don’t worry, I’ll protect you from Aunt Lillian.”

“God the two of you get worse every day,” Seokjin has magically changed into his shorts, tucking himself into the bed, “don’t wake me up until we pre-game.”

Doyeon and Namjoon don’t skimp on the festivities, although in taste the ideas are Doyeon’s in its entirety. It’s lavish and colorful, with a beautiful infinity pool in the middle decorated with lavender and pink headlights. There’s a buffet table overflowing with tasty food. There’s petal pink champagne overflowing from fountains, decorated with fresh strawberries bobbing around the fizzy drink.

“I don’t know,” Namjoon and Jungkook have been talking for well over an hour, and it’s clear how well they mesh together. Heck, you’ve accepted that Jungkook may like Namjoon more than he likes you. Jungkook’s eyes sparkle as Namjoon discusses the various genres of rap and hip-hop music, explaining the potency of mature themes in a young community, “but I will say music is like another language, knows no boundaries when it comes to sending their messages to others.”

You fight the urge to chuckle when Jungkook sighs dreamily at the music theory professor. “Wow, that’s so deep.”

Getting up from your cabana, you nudge Seokjin, who’s currently flirting it up with one of Doyeon’s bridesmaids. “Hey, wanna get a drink?” you ask, throwing your wrap on the cushions to reveal your strappy red bikini.

“And chicken tenders,” Seokjin presses a kiss to the bridesmaid’s cheek, bidding her goodbye as he follows you out of the shaded area.

“Do you two lovebirds want anything?” you stare pointedly at Namjoon and Jungkook. While Namjoon’s eyes stay in contact with you, you can’t help but smile a little more when Jungkook has a hard time keeping his gaze in one place.

“I think we’re fine,” Namjoon answers for both of them, swirling his beer bottle. “I’ll meet you two at the bar once I’m done.”

“Sure thing,” Seokjin puts a hand on your back to lead you to one of the open bars. As much as you like being in a handsome hotel with money to burn, nothing beats the fact that your entire family is here to celebrate. The elders have corroborated two cabanas for poker and other games, while your younger cousins are playing ping pong and air hockey on the other side.

“Namjoon sure is a dreamboat,” Seokjin bemoans, handing you an electric orange drink. You take a sip of it, and bug out when you realize it tastes nothing like alcohol. You’re definitely in for a night. “Like I can hear him wax music thingamajib any day.”

“I thought you were into that bridesmaid.”

“A mere diversion,” he sighs, leaning his tanned arms against the bar, “can’t ignore the deep voice Namjoon has, it’s intoxicating.”

“I’m sure Jungkook would agree,” you egg on.

“What are you two talking about?” you straighten up when the man of the hour shows up at the bar, absolutely glowing under the sunset. He orders a round for the three of you, and you immediately chug your own drink to get to the next one.

“Talking about how you’re stealing Jungkook away from me,” you joke, accepting another fruity drink from Namjoon. Damn, this stuff tastes like candy.

“Oh, never,” Namjoon replies brightly, waving the thought away, “do you see the way he looks at you? Hopelessly in love.”

Maybe it’s the copious amounts of alcohol, but you feel your stomach flip-flop at the thought of love. You’ve always known what love felt like, the warmth of Namjoon’s cheeks whenever he sees Doyeon, when your mom takes care of you when you’re sick, when Seokjin makes sure you’re not emotionally constipated 24/7. But the thought of Jungkook and you in love? It’s a feeling you secretly yearn for.

“Right? It’s disgusting,” Seokjin groans with an eye roll, “like, Jungkook wasn’t like that with Doyeon at all when they were together.”

The slip up has the three of you choking on your own thoughts, staring at each other like the three have just been told you’re on a prank show. But it is no prank, and you look at Seokjin who’s absolutely horrified.

“Oh shit,” he squeaks, looking at Namjoon guiltily, “did I say something I shouldn’t have said?”

“I don’t know,” Namjoon replies coolly, “did you?”

The ominous response gets you going, and you quickly place a hand on Namjoon’s arm, placating him. “They dated, yes. But it was only for a short time and we’ve sorted everything out. Nothing for you to worry about.”

“Oh,” Namjoon quirks his head, and regards you two with pursed lips. “I’m not one of those guys who freak out over other people’s exes. I’m just surprised that I’ve only heard this now,” Namjoon takes a slow sip of his drink, and despite your drink also being cold and refreshing, you’re absolutely sweating.

“Well, I’m sure Doyeon didn’t want to worry you.”

At the mention of his future wife, he beams. “You’re right, she’s considerate like that,” and the conversation ends just like that. He holds up his drink to the two of you, and you and Seokjin do the same. With a sharp clink he leaves you two to mull, happily conversing with the next round of guests he needs to entertain for the week.

“That guy is too nice for his own good,” you shake your head, asking the bartender for your third drink within ten minutes.

Seokjin leans over you and warbles, “So you’re telling me that Namjoon has no idea that Doyeon cheated on Jungkook in order to date him?” he’s sweating just like you are, following suit to your actions and asking to make his drink a double.

“I don’t know,” you bite your lip, your teeth worrying the dark skin, “I’ve been thinking about it for a while though. I just don’t want to get involved, you know?”

“But this is different!”

“But Doyeon’s family!”

“And all of a sudden you care about Doyeon’s feelings?” Seokjin gripes back, “it’s not about Doyeon, it’s about the both of them. And if we know something that Namjoon doesn’t, wouldn’t it be in our best interests to warn him before he seals a marriage deal that costs him over a zillion dollars?” he gestures to the extravagant wedding party.

“But we don’t even have any proof that’s the case,” you frown, “Doyeon could have changed—a little, not a lot—since meeting Namjoon, maybe she thinks it’s best to reveal as little as possible.”

Seokjin wonders what kind of family he has. One as chaotic as his takes a lot to stomach, and Seokjin likes to pride himself in his strong appetite. “Fine, let’s just keep a close eye on both of them this week. And if anything remotely fishy happens, we strike.”

“Deal.”

You return to the cabana alone, with a plate of fries for both you and Jungkook. Jungkook is also alone, laying on the lounge chair with his eyes closed. It gives you a chance to ogle your fake-boyfriend a little bit, reveling in the sight of his toned body.

Setting down your plate with a sharp rap of the glass, Jungkook opens one eye. “Hey,” he smiles, drinking in your muted expression, “you okay?”

Damn Jungkook for being able to read you so well. “I think so. It’s nothing, really.”

“Well, will you tell me if it’s something?”

“Yeah, I will.”

“So, I do have something to tell you though.” Jungkook sits up, regarding you wearily. “Can you… stand in front of me?” Confused, you shove a fry in your mouth and walk up to him as directed, your back blocking the entrance as you stand in front of him. “Okay, come closer. Now bend down,” you bend your back 90 degrees, and he presses a hand to your shoulder to stop you, “no, no. With your breasts out, just a little—there! Arch your back. Like you’re doing the Sorority Squat.”

“Excuse me—”

“The music isn’t even that loud,” he mutters to himself, “no one would need to push their boobs in my face to hear me.”

“Jungkook, is someone pressing boobs to your face?”

“Why,” he breaks into a playful grin, “jealous?”

“Not if it’s Aunt Lillian.”

“Unfortunately it wasn’t,” he twiddles with the drawstrings of his shorts. “It was Doyeon.”

Doyeon? She didn’t walk by your cabana all day. Heck, she barely greeted you when you arrived with Jungkook. But when Jungkook’s alone is when she decides to pounce? And with what motive?

“I don’t know,” he’s rambling to himself, “maybe I’m overthinking it. It was only half a second.”

“Jungkook, I have something to tell you,” you say instead, panic in your features.

“Is it something urgent?”

“Well, no but—”

“Then tell me when we get back to the room,” Jungkook easily pulls you onto his lap, and you instantly heat up when you feel your bare butt press against Jungkook’s golden thighs. “Like you said, we’re in Vegas. Let’s have fun while we can.”

“Okay,” you tuck your head between his neck and collarbone, reaching to press a kiss to his smooth jawline.

Relaxing against the plush lounge chair Jungkook feeds you fries while talking about the things he wants to do this week. It’s his first time in Vegas and he wants to make the most of it. He wants to visit all the buffets he sees on Buzzfeed compilations, relax at the pool, maybe catch a show. The thought of spending all week with him and your family is nice, and suddenly you don’t feel so awkward sitting on his lap, and eventually he pulls you between his thighs so you can lay on his chest.

“And between you and me,” he fake whispers against the shell of your ear, as if he’s telling you the biggest secret, “we’re the hottest couple here.”

The next three days leading up to the wedding are relatively uninteresting.

Uninteresting in the best way possible. On Monday you and Jungkook spend time with your little cousins, taking them to The Adventuredome, one of the resort's indoor theme parks. On Tuesday you and Jungkook go shopping at the outlet malls with your parents, blowing hundreds of dollars on cheap Levis that have your luggage bursting with a new wardrobe. In between all of that Seokjin and occasionally Namjoon joins you two in your buffet journey, hitting up the top spots and filling your tummies to the brim with delicious food.

On Wednesday, Jungkook brandishes two gold-foiled tickets in front of you, waving them around like a fan. With one finger, he pushes away your Pokémon battle, “I got us tickets to Cirque du Soleil,” he announces proudly, “waited in line for an hour.”

You gape, scrambling off of your bed and throwing your Nintendo Switch to the side. “Jungkook,” you marvel, “these are so expensive. How’d you manage to get a show for tonight?”

He shrugs, “Looked around.”

“You’ve been impulse buying a lot this week,” you tease, “like really, you don’t need three pairs of the same ripped jeans.”

“This wasn’t an impulse buy,” he says, “I’ve been looking around for shows. Just managed to pick them up today, so go get dressed for our date.”

Did Jungkook just call it a date? Giddy with excitement you throw the covers off, running into the bathroom to get ready. What a surprise, you didn’t think Jungkook would be into spontaneous things like this.

Seokjin left the bathroom open, so when you walk in the room it is steamy and warm. Your dear cousin is still in the shower, probably waiting for his conditioner to pass three minutes of set-in time.

“What are you getting ready for?” Seokjin asks over the rain shower.

“Kook got us tickets to Cirque du Soleil,” you chirp happily, looking through your skin care products.

“I wanna come!”

“Nope! Jungkook called it a date.”

“Oh, a date,” Seokjin drawls, putting his head under the water to rinse his hair clean. “Well then, should I vacate the room for tonight?”

“What, no!” you’ve closed the door, so thankfully Jungkook can’t hear you talking about him. “We’re not doing anything. We’re just two friends who are fake-dating going on a date.”

“Sounds like a real date, though,” Seokjin wraps a towel around himself to cover all his important bits before getting out of the shower, bumping elbows with you so he can brush his teeth. “Either way, I’ll be gone tonight. It’s my turn to watch the baby cousins. Don’t have too much fun while I'm in their room watching Despicable Me for the millionth time.”

“We’ll be sure to stop by with some pizza or something,” you tease, a little wiggle in your hips when you vacate the bathroom.

By the time you and Jungkook are ready, you two are dressed impeccably. Jungkook is wearing one of the ripped black jeans he bought on Tuesday, combined with a white button up and black blazer. A classic outfit with a little bit of Jungkook-themed flair. And to Jungkook’s surprise, you’re wearing the dress that he first saw you in, all those years ago. You’ve gained a little weight since college, but you still fill out the little black dress beautifully, the little white bow in the middle adding a simple yet adorable touch. It took a little sleuthing and searching through your old college clothes, but you were determined to find it when Jungkook reminded you how much you love the design.

Clearly from the way Jungkook is currently gaping at you like a bloated fish, he loves it too.

The show is beautiful and colorful, leaving you speechless and in tears by the end of it. Jungkook lets you hold his hand the entire time, feeling a bout of anxiety anytime the acrobats fall gracefully despite the large height.

Overall, it was a wonderful show, paired with your equally enamouring date. It’s getting harder and harder to distinguish what’s fake and what’s real in your heart, and throughout the night you’re sorely reminded that you should tell Jungkook how you feel.

But by the time you get to the room your parents are calling you, asking to get their suit and dresses out of the car so hotel service can do a last minute press and dry clean.

“I’ll be back,” you say to Jungkook, “I need to go get their clothes out of the car. They’re always so forgetful.”

“Want me to come?” he offers, hand shying away from inserting the keycard in.

“No, I’ll only be fifteen minutes, tops.”

“So I guess this is this the part where I get a goodnight kiss?” he asks cheekily, leaning on his heels so his tall frame reaches yours. You don’t hesitate to give a short peck to his pretty pink lips. He pouts at the brevity, “that was too quick.”

“Go inside,” you insist, “the sooner you get ready for bed the sooner I can get ready for bed.”

“Then more kisses?”

“Then more kisses.”

Jungkook breaks into an all-teeth smile, unable to control himself when he dips down and steals a longer, more lingering kiss to your lips. “I had a great time tonight,” he says, mimicking every single teenage rom-com protagonist who’s deeply in love with the popular jock. “Don’t take too long, okay?”

You nod, pushing him inside, “C’mon, if you stopped talking I’d be back by now!”

Once the door closes shut, you let yourself do a little dance in the hallway, wiggling your butt and giving yourself a mini-celebration. You quickly text your group chat that you just came back from the Cirque show.

Jimin: what, a date with your fake date?

Hobi: jeon jungcock? 👀👀

Jimin: whaaaaaattttt. U’ve gotta have sat in his lap at least. 3 times since you’ve started this ting

Hobi: i’ve heard things in college…

Taehyung: u are all gross and i hate u

Taehyung: but so am i bc im very curious

Just as you’re about to send a heated reply, the elevator dings, revealing a pissed off Doyeon. She’s bare-faced, in a fluffy lilac bath robe and matching puff ball slippers. You slip in right beside her, making sure there’s a comfortable amount of space between you two.

“You’re going to the parking garage too?” you ask, eyes lingering on the lit button.

“Yeah,” she’s looking at her phone, a few stray hairs from her mahogany bun falling onto her forehead, “Aunt Lillian left her medication in the car. I don’t know why she has to send me, I’m busy getting married.”

“My parents left their formal clothes in the car,” you shrug, “you know, my parents and Aunt Lillian share the same brain cell. Gotta help them out once in a while.”

The icy silence in the elevator is probably the calmest you and Doyeon have been since you’ve announced your relationship status with Jungkook. You fight the sigh, opting to take out your phone and open some unread messages.

Jeon Jung-boo-thang: hurry up, the bed’s cold without u

You: lool, why do u look constipated

Jeon Jung-boo-thang: because i am, hurry up. Im bringing ur switch to the toilet and playing on your profile

You: JEON WAIT YAMPERS AT 5HP GO TO THE POKEMON CENTER U HEATHEN

You tilt your head a centimeter, feeling Doyeon breathing down your neck like Puff the Magic Dragon. You look at her with wide eyes. Her long, slender neck manages to snake its way next to your head, “Can I help you?” you ask amusedly, clutching your phone to your chest.

“Are you two really together?” she asks, batting her lashes. All this week she’s left you alone, and you’ve been wondering when she’s going to make herself known. It’s a little self-absorbed you have to admit, but ever since Namjoon’s ignorance to Doyeon’s previous relationship, you’ve been on edge.

“Of course we are,” you spit back, “I love him.”

And you must be very convincing, because Doyeon’s gaze falters just a fraction. You glare at her, staking your claim. Ever since Jungkook told you the reason Doyeon hates you is because she’s jealous, you’ve started to feel a bit of sympathy for her. Doyeon is beautiful and smart, she has no reason to feel this way. But the brain holds fickle thoughts sometimes, bringing darkness to the mind.

“He loved me first,” she bites back, lifting her chin.

“And why do you care?” you laugh tonelessly. The elevator dings open, and you’re met with the open air and concrete of the parking garage. “He may have loved you first, but he’ll love me last.”

You leave the elevator first, a little pep in your step as you make your way to the rental car to gather your parent’s things. While the words you uttered are white in nature and may not hold any sort of weight to them, it manages to bring Doyeon to her knees, absolutely quaking in the elevator.

You’re tasting revenge, and it’s sweet.

“Okay, you need to leave,” Seokjin pulls away the shot glass from your lips, “I didn’t spend days planning the itinerary for you to mess it up. Bridal party in Doyeon’s suite and the groom’s party in Namjoon’s parents suite.”

“That’s dumb,” you chastise, crossing your arms, “we’re all meeting at the same club at 10. Why can’t we pre-party together?”

“Because it’s tradition!”

“Screw tradition,” you stumble on your heels as you purse your lips at Jungkook, “Kook, when we get married I don’t wanna do a whole boy-and-girl party. We’re equals, right?”

“Of course, baby,” he cooes, being careful not to smudge your makeup when he presses his lips to the crown of your head. “But for the sake of Seokjin’s sanity, you should probably go to Doyeon’s. It’ll only be an hour or two.”

You gasp exaggeratedly at the blatant betrayal. He only grins cheekily in response, dipping down to press a wet kiss to your cheek. “Fine,” you cross your arms, snatching back your drink from Seokjin’s grasp to knock it down.

Leaving the bachelor pre-party pains you considerably. They’re having such a good time joking around the suite, telling each other fun stories and relaxing in chairs as they watch TV. This is your kind of crowd, not to mention that you can peacefully check out Jungkook’s ass in those tight dress pants without any crazy club lights distorting your vision.

From past family party experience you already have a feeling what’s coming for you in the ladies’ suite.

Loud music pours from Doyeon’s suite, and it’s completely unlocked. The bridal party is raving, ten seconds away from being completely drunk and immobile. The lights are being manually shut on and off like some sort of cheap rager, and you have to tell Yoojung to tone it down before you get a seizure.

The stench of acidic drinks and the tang of alcoholic air is palpable, and instead of a shot you opt for a glass of peach champagne to slow you down.

As you walk deeper into the suite, you notice a crowd forming by the balcony. Tapping your cousin Nari on the shoulder, you regard her with a hug and kiss. “What’s going on over there?” you ask, heels not helping you see any better.

Nari’s all blushy and pink, hiccuping as she gestures to the balcony. “Her maid of honor got Doyeon a very special gift!”

Managing to weave through the women blocking your view, you fight the urge to gag when you have a clear view of the scene in front of you.

You really don’t understand the purpose of bachelor and bachelorette parties. “One night to be single all over again!” they all say, even though they’re not actually single? Like why does the couple suddenly get one night of forgiveness when you’ve already spent years being in a committed relationship?

Why is it okay that Doyeon’s dry humping a stripper on the balcony? Her white silk dress is ruched dangerously high, soon close to flashing her family. Aunties and friends and the like are cheering her on, and she flips her head perfectly to all the phones shoved in their faces, making sure to get the perfect angle.

Fighting the urge to roll your eyes, you turn back in the hopes that your other family members would be willing to have a good old-fashioned tip back with you.

You squeal when your hands accidentally land on a bare, oiled chest. You look up, mortified at the large man covered in black harnesses. “Hey babe, I’m Wonho,” he says, faking a sultry gaze as he looks at you up and down, “you’re part of the bridal party too? Wanna dance?”

Feeling naked, you push past him, careful not to get anything on your dress. Wonho? Wonno.

Jungkook loves your family.

(Except Doyeon.)

As much as he told you not to worry about him, and he’ll be completely fine when he meets your family, he couldn’t help be a little wary on the flight over. After all, it’s been two years and he didn’t know how things would be different.

Chaoticism and all, your family is a thing to be cherished. Even though Yoongi has been on mood swings that make Jungkook question his sanity from time to time, and Seokjin is secretly breathing down Jungkook’s back every time he so glances at you, he thinks things are right where they should be.

But despite all that they regarded him with familiarity, hugged and kissed him like old friends, something is different. They’ve turned over a new page for him. They don’t bring up Doyeon. They ask about his family, his job, his life in the city. They ask about how you and Jungkook met, and how happy they are for you. How happy they are for him.

Oh, how he wishes everything could be different. In another world, you two would already be together.

He wasn’t lying back at the cabana when he said you two are the hottest couple at the resort, including the bridal party (but don’t tell Namjoon). You look absolutely stunning in your sparkly red dress, accentuating all the right parts and lighting up the whole room.

When he finds you in the club you’re sitting down with your Aunties, keeping the elders company while the younger ones are flagging down the bartenders. He thinks it’s cute, how well you fit in between them, coddling you like you’re still a child in their eyes.

“Dear, your boyfriend is here!” your one Aunt yells over the loud EDM.

You lift your head up quickly, giving him the prettiest smile. Your teeth glow purple under the neon lights, and he fights the urge to laugh when he holds out a hand. “Mind if I steal her from you?”

“Of course, she’s gotta live a little!”

You pout, a little wobbly but nevertheless still in the right mind as you shuffle out of the booth to meet his awaiting arms. “Hey handsome,” your voice is thick and sweet-smelling, “come here often?”

“Only when my girlfriend does,” he replies cheekily, hands immediately coming to your butt to smooth out your dress. He shys a bit when your Aunties hoot and holler at his public display of affection, but all he wants to do was pull the hem down a little bit. No way is he going to let anyone get a flash of your goods.

“Let’s dance!” you take your hand in his, leading him to a comfortable corner of the dance floor.

Clubs aren’t really your scene, aligning with Jungkook’s sentiments towards the loud generic music and terrible smell. But you’re in Vegas, and he feels that it’s all part of the package to experience the nightlife at least once. He puts his hands on your waist and you giggle like you’re in prom, hands coming to rest on the collar of his button down.

“Hey,” he says with a lopsided smirk, “wanna make out?”

“Sure,” he notices that you don’t even check if anyone’s seeing, and it makes his heart flutter when you don’t hesitate to get on your tiptoes to meet him halfway.

He’s always hoped for a moment like this, a moment where the room stops spinning and both your minds click into place. It’s almost comical, how he distinctly notes that the music fades once his lips touch yours. The kiss is hot, yet intimate. Even though he makes excuses to kiss you all the time because of practice, it goes to show that you two definitely never needed it. Your tiny hands grip the collar of his button down, bringing you two impossibly close despite the hot air. His larger hands grip at the strings that hold your measly dress together, grappling at any excuse to get to your soft skin. The two of you are a natural when it comes to each other’s intimacy.

The two of you pull away, mesmerized. You haven’t kissed like that before. He melts under your stare, his thumb reaching to nick off any lip gloss that’s moved in the process.

Seokjin comes down the floor to haul you both by the shoulders, “C’mon lovebirds, they’re taking wedding shots!”

The two of you follow your cousin to the crowd of people that is your family, already with their own drinks in hand. Doyeon and Namjoon are sitting atop the bar, making a very loud toast that consisted of a quick “thank you!” and “we love you!” before downing their drinks with their arms linked together. The room is thrumming with excitement for tomorrow’s festivities, and surprisingly, you and Jungkook included. He tucks himself in your body like a puzzle piece, hugging you from behind while he watches Namjoon’s eyes sparkle with love under the neons.

The nightclub gets a little blurry after that, with the copious amounts of alcohol and shameless actions from your family and friends. By the time it’s twelve Jungkook notices you swaying at a rate that you can’t handle. He knows your limits and knows when you have to urge to pee every five minutes, it’s time to go. With a chaste kiss you leave him at the bar, deciding to make a pitstop to the bathroom before telling Jungkook you want to head up.

You’re locked in a stall when you hear Yoojung’s voice.

“Ugh,” she groans, voice echoing through the tiny room. “Jungkook is so sexy. Do you see the way he’s dancing out there? He’s a literal babe magnet, I can’t believe he ended up with someone like y/n.”

You don’t move a muscle, pressing your ear against the door that hides you. The silly slander isn’t news to you, Doyeon has been feeding her friends all sorts of bullcrap so they wouldn’t bother talking to you.

“Yeah, Jungkook’s a real treat but he dated Doyeon first. Sounds like she’s into sloppy seconds,” Elly replies, another bridesmaid you’ve met in passing. “But I don’t know, they do look happy together.”

“Please, I’m sure Jungkook’s just using her so he can get one more chance at Doyeon before she ties the knot,” you bristle, the thought of Jungkook still having feelings for Doyeon makes your heart thud painfully against your chest, “like, what a downgrade. Namjoon and Doyeon do not deserve this drama. If Jungkook ever liked Doyeon at all, he wouldn’t have come. Period.”

You slam the door open, causing Elly to squeal and Yoojung’s YSL lipstick to fall onto the sink. You’re the epitome of relaxation, walking towards the sink to wash your hands. The bridesmaids simply stare at you, unable to formulate a comeback. When you finally dry your hands, you say your next words.

“Jungkook is here because he loves me,” an act act act. This is all an act. You shouldn’t be this offended because you know it’s all false. “And you’re wrong. It’s not Jungkook that doesn’t deserve Doyeon. Jungkook was too good for Doyeon.”

And you slam your heels against the tile, stilettos pounding to the beat of the music. Your exit is full of anger and frustration as you ignore the burn in your step and the ache in your heart, flagging the first bartender you see to get you a double.

Shot for shot, that anger soon melts into guilt as Yoojung’s words sink in. The thought of Jungkook using you to get to Doyeon is terrible, you can barely stomach the thought. But that’s exactly what you’re doing, right? You’re using Jungkook to get back at Doyeon.

Why did you even want to get back at Doyeon anymore? Why do you have to prove anything to her? If she just continues to push you around, isn’t that more on her than it is on you?

Jungkook soon finds you after you’ve nursed a few drinks, leaning unceremoniously against a barstool. His eyes widen at your state, and he immediately sheds his jacket to wrap it around your waist.

“Why did you drink so much?” he chastises, “it’s the night before the wedding.”

“Jungkookie,” you warble, clutching your stomach, “I don’t feel so good.”

He sighs, bending down. “Get on my back. Make sure the jacket covers you up, okay?”

He doesn’t even grunt when you put all your weight on him, feeling like a ragdoll as he hoists you up. You wrap your arms around his shoulders, letting him carry you to your room. Most of the older family already went upstairs to sleep, so none of your cousins could care less when they see you get hauled away by Jungkook.

You inhale, he smells like sweat and cologne. “I like putting my head between your neck,” you babble, and you feel Jungkook chuckle through his chest, “you smell so nice there. It’s the bestset! Comfiest place ever, ‘specially when m’sleepy.”

“Are you sleepy now, baby?” You love how smooth the petname falls from his lips.

“I will be when we get upstairs,” you reply, happy to see the elevator is empty. “I’m just all up in my head.”

“Is that why you were drinking so much? You said you were gonna stop earlier.”

“Yeah, but,” you shamefully tuck your head in his shoulder, “I was frustrated.”

“Frustrated? At who?” concern laces his tone as he struggles to hold you with one hand and fumble for his key in the other. You tighten your legs around his slim waist until the door clicks open, and he immediately walks over to your bed to plop you down. “Babe, are you crying?” he finally has a good look at your face, horrified to see the streaks of tears mixed with mascara running down your face.

“I wa-was jealous,” you confess tearily, clutching your face in your hands, “some girls in the bathroom were calling you sexy and that you were only here so you could try to win over Doyeon. I know it sounds ridiculous and you would never do that but. The thought of you getting back with her makes me so jealous and I hate it! I’m starting to feel so guilty about this, all of this. I put all of this on ourselves and I’m ruining it.”

“Ruining what? You’re not making any sense.” Jungkook places a hand on your knee, crouching down so he can look up at you.

“I’m ruining us,” you gush despondently, “I’m ruining any potential of us before we even start.”

Jungkook freezes, hand clutching your knee like a lifeline. The potential of you two together? You’ve thought of that? Jungkook didn’t drink much tonight, so his mind is definitely running on all cogs.

Coming to a conclusion, he rubs slow, soothing circles on your knee, his other hand reaching up to wipe the tears from your face. “You’re not ruining anything,” he declares firmly, “that’s impossible. I may have agreed to fake-date you because of Doyeon, but I stayed because of you.”

His heart aches seeing you so upset, and he decides to take initiative to get you out of your clothing and ready for bed. You don’t have any words, opting to let Jungkook take care of you as you try to calm yourself down. He finds a spare t-shirt, a long one so you’ll be comfortable. He doesn’t bat an eye when he unzips your dress, in favor of balling up the shirt and getting you clothed as fast as possible. He rifles through the bathroom to find your makeup wipes, and he’s gentle when he scrubs up the once pretty makeup you spent half an hour doing. Barefaced and fresh, you look sleepy and ready to crash.

But before Jungkook can tuck you in, you clutch his arm.

“Jungkook,” you murmur sleepily, “I think I lo—”

“I know, baby,” he doesn’t want a confession like this, and he’s sure you wouldn’t want it either. You still look a little green and you’re not sober, so he makes the executive decision to pin these feelings for later. “I’m not trying to invalidate you, I promise. I want you to tell me this, all of this in the morning. We’ll talk then.”

“Okay,” you melt in the sheets, pulling the blankets up to your chest. When you see Jungkook move away from the bed, you jolt, “Where are you going?”

Jungkook smiles, reaching over to tuck you back in, “I left my blazer in Namjoon’s room. I’ll be right back, okay?”

He walks out of your room as quietly as he can, making sure to close the door slowly. Once it’s sealed shut, he leaps up, giving himself a silent cheer as he bounds down the hall. You like him back!

The smile on his face is tired but full of fervor as he makes his way to Namjoon and Doyeon’s suite. He doesn’t even care that he probably has to talk to Doyeon to get his jacket back, thoughts filled with the excitement of his requited feelings and going back to his room to cuddle up with you.

He doesn’t even have to knock when the large double doors swing open. Dumbfounded, he looks down at Doyeon, wearing a tiny black nightie and dangling his jacket with one finger. It’s an outfit that leaves nothing to the imagination, and he feels his neck heat up at the feeling he’s encroaching on an intimate moment.

“You left this,” she says slowly, a tiny smirk on her lips.

“Uh, thanks,” he says, making sure not to touch her when he grabs his blazer.

In her other hand she holds up her room’s designated ice bucket. “Could you also get me some ice, please? Namjoon’s fast asleep and I really don’t want to walk out all… exposed.”

He swallows his sigh, knowing it’s going to take significantly longer to get back to you when Doyeon drawls like this. “Of course,” he replies tersely, “after all, you are the bride.”

“Thanks, Jungkookie.”

He makes quick work of getting Doyeon the ice, pumping his long legs down the hall. The ice room is cold and cramped, barely enough for his tall frame to fit in. He jabs the container in the holder, pressing the button ten times per second to get as much ice out as possible.

As soon as he turns around with the ice, he drops the whole bucket.

Like glass, it shatters onto the ground, hundreds of little clear pebbles skimming across the floor like marbles. Doyeon’s pushing Jungkook against the ice machine, freshly manicured hands splayed across his chest. Her body is flush against his, making sure that he feels all of her with her thin silk gown.

“What the fuck, Doyeon get off of me!” a little part of him hopes she’ll come to her senses on her own so he doesn’t have to put his hands on her.

“C’mon, Kookie,” her voice is a sickly candy sweet, her eyes wide with hunger as she takes in his form, “just one more night, you and me. Like old times. One more night before I tie the knot.”

“You’re crazy,” he balks, running his hand through his hair, “this is sexual harassment, do you know that?”

“You don’t mean that, Kookie,” Doyeon dips a red-tipped nail down his chest, “why settle for someone like y/n when I’m right here?”

He grabs her wrists, firm. She winces at the contact, but doesn’t say anything when Jungkook delivers her a scary glare. It gets her quiet, fearful of this version of Jungkook. Doyeon’s never seen Jungkook like this before, so unwilling to bend at her whim and emanating all his power against her.

“Why settle for your cousin?” he whispers like it’s the most obvious thing in the world, “because, I love her.”

Her lip curls in disgust, nails digging into the palm of his hand. “But you loved me first.”

“And I’ll love her last,” he spits pack, letting go of her. His anger splits for a brief second, regarding Doyeon with sorrow, “this is low, even for you.”

Jungkook pushes past the ice, wobbling out of the ice room. He doesn’t look back, he just knows that he needs you right now. He needs to tell you everything, figure out a plan to cancel the wedding or something.

But when he crashes inside the room, you’re dead asleep. He can’t find the courage to wake up Seokjin as well, who returned and is sleeping in his club outfit. He groans, feeling useless as he stares at the two of you, ignorant of what just conspired ten minutes ago.

And Namjoon, what is he going to tell Namjoon? Poor guy doesn’t deserve any of this.

Walking up to your side of the bed, he tucks your loose hair behind your ear. You look so peaceful now, so beautiful.

It’s just going to have to wait until the morning.

The morning of the wedding, you wake up alone.

The first thought that runs through your head is that Jungkook has rejected you. The little, insecure bug that will never go away in your brain fills you with rash thoughts. He’s on a flight half way back home and he regrets this whole week.

But after that exaggeration, you notice two aspirin and a bottle of water on your nightstand, along with your phone that’s fully charged.

You pull up the screen to check the dozens of messages that flood your app.

Jeon Jung-boo-thang: morning babe, im sorry i had to leave early. Namjoon showed up at our door freaking out that his suit is the wrong fit and shade. Now im running around vegas trying to find a replacement that doesn’t look like an elvis presley extra

Jeon Jung-boo-thang: but i didn’t forget what you said last night, i promise! Just go get ready and i’ll meet u at the chapel outside the resort.

Jeon Jung-boo-thang: i also have something to say to you

Jeon Jung-boo-thang: wow i didn’t realize how ominous that sounds. Dw, everything will be fine

When someone tells you something will be fine, it’s a universal agreement that no, things will not be fine.

So you get dressed, and put on your makeup mindlessly. You don’t really know what to make of Jungkook’s cryptic message, but you decide to leave those thoughts in the back of your mind as you go to the other rooms to help your family get ready.

Seokjin is busy tying the ring bearer’s tie, looking handsome with his slicked back hair and polished grey suit. “Morning, cousin,” he sing-songs, “you look beautiful today!”

You smooth out your dress, a cascading silver number with starry sparkles. You feel like you’re living out your magical girl fantasies, wrapped up in layers of tulle and a sparkly sweetheart bodice.

“Right back at you. Say, you didn’t see Jungkook this morning, did you?”

“No, but I heard he’s with Namjoon hunting for a new suit. Why?”

“Nothing,” you lean against the guest table, “he just said something really ominous over text.”

“I will never get a peaceful day so long as I’m in this family,” he says this directly to the ring bearer, a toddler who’s obviously confused at his uncle’s weird sayings.

Your phone beeps conveniently, displaying Jungkook’s name.

Jeon Jung-boo-thang: just got his suit. We’ll be there in fifteen. Meet me at the garden behind the chapel, please. It’s urgent

Now you’re just worried. So you tell Seokjin your sentiments, and that he should have his phone on hand in case you needed him. With a confused nod, you leave him to go down to the garden.

The groomsmen and bridesmaids are already at the chapel taking pictures. Only the wedding party is really allowed at this time, but you manage your way through the gardens virtually undetected. Jungkook’s already waiting for you, hiding under a white gazebo overlooking the hotel’s fountain.

He looks gorgeous in his all black pinstripe suit, hair pushed back and pants fitted perfectly around his waist and thighs. When he sees you he gets up, full of skittish energy. You note that his hair isn’t even styled, only washed and curling slightly at the ends, as if he’s in a rush.

“W-wow,” he marvels when you rush up to him, “you look gorgeous.”

You drop the handful of silver tulle, letting it fall to the floor. “Jungkook,” you clasp his hand in both of his, guilt flooding your eyes. You’ve been thinking about this all morning, and you need to cut to the chase. Jungkook tries to open his mouth but you silence him with a finger on his lips. “I can’t—I can’t do this. I know this sounds really stupid and you probably don’t want anything to do with me after this, but I shouldn’t have made this elaborate scheme,” you bite your lip, feeling even more antsy as Jungkook squirms in his grip. He however, is trying very hard to focus with his eyes, confused at your sudden confession. “I like you, Jungkook. I don’t want to parade you around like a revenge plot anymore, it isn’t fair and it’s wrong in so many ways—”

“That’s great,” he says simply, brown eyes swirling with thoughts, “um, ditto. But—”

“Wow,” you frown, “I pour my heart out to you and this is what I get?”

“It’s great that you want to be selfless right now,” Jungkook takes your hand, firm and tight, “but without this elaborate scheme, we wouldn’t be saving asses like we are right now.”

“What are you talking about?” You thought Jungkook rushed you down here so you could talk about each other’s feelings before the wedding.

“Doyeon just threw herself on me last night. I got her ice and she took that as an invitation to seduce me like an episode of Sex and the City. Namjoon needs to divorce her, like yesterday.”

Your face then morphs into something dark and ugly, and you fling your whole confession out the window. The thought of Doyeon going as far as throwing herself on Jungkook as a last ditch attempt to get back at you, has you seeing blood red. “What? Why didn’t you tell me this sooner!”

“You were asleep!” he shoots back, putting his hands on your shoulders. He rubs warm strokes up and down your bare arms, “please relax. You’re shaking.”

“And why didn’t you tell Namjoon when you were driving around all morning?”

“I tried to!” he retorts, hands swinging in the air. You huff when his hands land back on your shoulders, preventing you from running to the chapel to extract Doyeon out yourself, “but he just kept talking shit about how much he loves Doyeon and he can’t imagine being together with anyone but her and I felt so bad! I’m sorry I chickened out. I really don’t wanna be the one to break Namjoon’s heart. I’m just the plus one!”

You pinch your brows, mulling it over. “Fuck it, let’s crash a wedding,” you declare, “where’s Namjoon and how can we get him alone?”

Jungkook exhales, a hand carding up to loosen his thin silver tie. “He’s taking pictures with the groomsmen right now. It’s gonna be awhile before we get a chance to talk.”

“Fuck,” you curse, sitting down on the white bench. Jungkook presses soothing circles on your back. “We have no choice, we have to get to him before the ceremony starts.”

“You’ll have to get through me, first.”

Doyeon’s not even in her wedding dress when she strides up to the two of you. She’s in ballet flats with her hair and makeup done, but the only thing she’s wearing is the thin underdress of her actual ball gown, a simple silk negligee that reaches her ankles. You don’t even know how she’s managed to escape the bridal party, especially without her dress.

Feeling protective, you step in front of Jungkook. “Before you say anything,” you murmur, “I’m not ruining your wedding, and I never wanted to. You’re ruining it because of your mistakes.”

“Oh, boo-hoo,” Doyeon rolls her eyes, playing with her nails, “I didn’t even do anything wrong, everyone knows that on the bachelorette’s night she can do whatever she wants. Namjoon could’ve fucked whoever too if he wasn’t so faithful.”

“Namjoon is ten times the partner you are and would never do that,” You’re seeing red, unable to comprehend the complete garbage spilling from Doyeon’s lips. “You touched my boyfriend without his consent, and I will never forgive you for that,” your voice is scarlet, angry and thin.

“It’s not like he isn’t used to it, I—”

“NO!” the sound that comes out of your mouth has all three of you flinching, and you’re thankful the gazebo is far enough so that the rest of the wedding party is oblivious to your actions. “You’re not allowed to justify yourself anymore, Doyeon. What you did was fucked up, what you’ve done to all of us is fucked up!” You realize now that you didn’t need to get back at Doyeon with a fake date, what you needed was this. You needed a reprieve, a chance to lay down your law. “Jungkook was right all along. You are jealous. You’re jealous and selfish and have no shame. You think you own whatever you set your eyes on, but you’re wrong. We’re not objects, we’re people.”

You walk up to Doyeon, eye to eye. You jab a hand at her chest, pushing her back slightly. You soak up your cousin’s expression, and you watch as Doyeon’s eyes pop out in surprise at your act of boldness. “So you have a choice here. You can either swallow your pride and leave Namjoon at the aisle quietly and save whatever dignity you have left. Take your pathetic ass on the next flight back home and pack up your apartment. Or, we can start a big scene at your ceremony,” you probably look manic, filled with freshly injected power, “I know Seokin’s always wanted to yell ‘I object!’ at a wedding.”

“You have no proof,” Doyeon glares right back, taking a step closer to you. Your noses are practically touching, but you dig your heels in the white-stained wood, puffing up your chest and standing your ground.

“Doesn’t matter,” you bite back, “what matters is that Namjoon will doubt you. Namjoon knows we’d never do anything to sabotage a wedding without a valid reason. Even if you do get married tonight, we have Jungkook’s word and proof of a relationship that overlaps with his. I find this option to be far worse because it’s prolonging the inevitable,” you shrug, “I hope you two didn’t sign a prenup.”

Hot, angry tears mess up her meticulously done makeup. Black rivers carve through her porcelain skin, showing the feelings that have been dormant since been hidden under a facade. Doyeon’s eyes dart back and forth between the two of you. She’s practically vibrating in combined fear and rage, seeing blurry images and memories and regrets of what could’ve been if not for her self-absorption. And finally, your cousin comes to a decision.

“I hate you,” she emphasizes each word with the most concentrated of venoms in her tone. WIth one last look at the two of you, she stomps away. Instead of going to the direction of the chapel however, she takes the shortcut back to the hotel.

Her grave words are unsurprising, but nevertheless disappointing. A thinly veiled smile grazes your lips, sadder than ever as you watch your cousin go. “And I pity you.”

As soon as she’s gone Jungkook doesn’t hesitate to scoop you up, hugging you tightly as you fight the urge to cry again. “Oh babe, that was really hot. The way you stood your ground? That was amazing!” Jungkook takes out his silver pocket square to wipe the stray tears that threaten to ruin your makeup. “You’re so strong, don’t you know that? You did it and I’m so proud of you.”

As much as you want to revel in the affection, go back and bed and fall asleep until noon, you can’t. Grasping Jungkook by the hand, you tug him to the chapel. “C’mon,” you say, “we have to corner Namjoon.”

The groomsmen photos are done by the time you get there. Thankfully, the to-be-groom doesn’t look too occupied. His eyes widen upon seeing you two stumble from the garden of all places.

“Oh, y/n. Jungkook,” Namjoon tilts his head curiously at how winded you two look, equally flushed and out of breath. From your state, Namjoon muses that it must've taken a lot of effort to finally get to the groom unattended, save for a few random family members he’s making small talk with, “The wedding isn’t for another hour but I must say, you two look radiant together. Doyeon always thought you’d end up an old spinster-catlady, but I always told her that you’re too beautiful to be single for long,” he pauses to send the aforementioned man a wink, “Jungkook’s a lucky guy. What were you two doing back there?”

“Uh, things?” Jungkook scratches the back of his head, not wanting to reiterate the fiasco between Doyeon moments before.

Namjoon smirks at the ebony-haired man, “Couple things?”

You can’t take this needless small talk anymore. With a teary groan, you throw yourself at Namjoon. You hug him tight, and you don’t even care when you feel a slosh of his water bottle sprinkle your hairstyle.

“Joonie,” you bemoan, “please, please don’t leave me. You’re the best not-cousin ever. I know it’ll be a pain to face Doyeon after today but you’re a strong independent man and when you’re ready Jin is single and ready to mingle—ow! Jungkook! Did you just pinch my ass?”

“Do you really think setting him up with the next cousin is the best idea right now?”

“I figured a little humor would lighten the blow,” you sulk.

“I’m sorry what—what blow?” Namjoon frowns, pushing you away from him. “Y/n, have you been crying?”

The tears resurface at that moment, like a kettle on overboil. Namjoon’s face is knitted together, unable to grasp at any conclusion. Namjoon feels something grave is upon the sky as he tenderly brushes away your tears with his thumbs before releasing you. Instantly Jungkook pulls you to his chest, patting you soothingly. As much as you two do not want to be the bearer of bad news, the time is now.

“Namjoon,” Jungkook says, finding the strength that was previously stuck in his throat, “we have to tell you something.”

Needless to say, Las Vegas is very forgiving when it comes to last minute wedding cancellations.

The whole wedding party, both Namjoon and yours, collectively feels like a whole ice bucket has been dumped upon your families. You would like to say that the whole issue was handled mess free, but that would be a bald-faced lie.

There was screaming, crying, hysterical laughter from all sides. Doyeon’s parents were of course furious, embarrassed, unable to calm down a hysterical Doyeon as they haul her on the next flight home. You have a feeling they won’t be showing up to family events anytime soon.

Namjoon’s family leaves quietly, frustrated, but classy. After all, they know at the back of their heads they dodged a bullet. Everyone leaves except Namjoon however, who isn’t quite ready to go back to his and Doyeon’s apartment. Namjoon invites Seokjin and some other close cousins to stay in his suite until their flight tomorrow afternoon, wanting to be surrounded by close friends and (almost) family.

As for your family, they decide to find the silver lining. While the chapel was able to cancel the wedding, the reception wasn’t as easy to sway. At the very last second, your grandparents decided to make use of the reception and renew their Golden Anniversary vows instead. The ceremony will be a quick, sweet affair. At this very moment, your cousin Yoongi is getting officiated online.

And for you? You’re in the place where you’ve wanted to remain all week. A fluffy hotel bed wrapped up with your not-boyfriend.

Or?

Would a not-boyfriend be snuggling against your chest like you’re the softest teddy bear in the toy shop? Would a not-boyfriend be hooking your leg atop his lap, forcing you to latch onto him so his hands can roam freely against your soft thighs?

“We have to get ready for the wedding,” you whine against his hold, to no avail when he only holds you tighter.

“But your grandparents are already married,” Jungkook whines right back, nuzzling his nose in your head. “This is like an afterparty fifty years later.”

“I wanna get dressed,” you insist, pushing yourself up, “and we still need to talk.”

Without Seokjin staying with you, the hotel room feels much bigger and freer for the two of you. Your clothes are scattered on the floor, uncaring of any wrinkles or smears that would get on the delicate fabric.

All that matters is that Jungkook is still here with you. Doyeon’s wedding is called off, but he’s still lying in bed with you. You want to burn this image to memory, and keep it forever. Jungkook laying in only his white undershirt and boxers, looking at you dreamily as if he’s still in nap-mode. Hair that was previously windswept and exposing his forehead is now out of place, fluffy and sticking out in all directions. His cheeks are flushed with coral-colored warmth, and a little puffy because you two have been sleeping most of the afternoon.

“Right, talk,” he repeats, letting you hand him his black button up so he can clothe himself.

You throw off your shirt somewhere behind you, not wanting to face him as you walk to the full-length mirror. “So, I think my feelings for you are pretty clear and out in the open…”

“Same, I think I made it pretty clear as well.”

“What? You turn around, looking at where he’s still half-covered in bed. “You did not. I distinctly remember almost confessing my love to you last night. And then this morning, only for you to cut me off and say ‘that’s great’.”

“Oh,” he stares at the white sheets that cover his lower half. “I guess I didn’t then.”

You smile wryly, turning back to face the mirror so you can slip into your dress that’s been pooled around your ankles like a silver halo. “Maybe you thought it in your mind and forgot to tell me.”

That seems about right. Jungkook has a tendency to be a little too passionate for his own good, windswept in thoughts and feelings until they consume him. He hops out of bed, walking only in his dress shirt and socks as he makes his way to the mirror. “Then let me do all the talking,” he says softly against your neck, hands on your hips.

You shiver when you feel the cold silver of the zipper whirr up your body, Jungkook’s large hands splaying across your back to smooth out the waistline.

“You of all people would know that being with Doyeon is a trip,” he chuckles into the crook of your neck, “I thought that was what love felt like. Being codependent, jumping through hurdles, trying so hard to please someone who can’t be pleased.”

Jungkook’s hands wrap around your waist, hugging you tightly. He squeezes you and holds you like the most precious thing in the entire world. Through the mirror, you two are quite a pair.

“But with you, I never knew love could be like this, feel like this.”

“So… are you saying you love me?” you fight the urge to bounce around in his grip, the biggest smile on your face.

“You really just want me to say ‘I love you’ and be done with it, huh?”

Within seconds he’s pulling you from behind, whirling you around to the edge of the bed. He manages to flouce up your skirts to billow around his lap, sitting you down on his bare thighs.

“You look like a cupcake, all sprawled up like this,” Jungkook says cutely, peppering kisses in a trail from your chest all the way to your lips. “You look like a huge, silvery cupcake and I love you. It’s so easy to love you.”

Maybe it was kismet that Jungkook didn’t get to you first all those years ago. Maybe the right time is right here, right now.

“I love you, too,” you say happily, dipping down to press a long, passionate kiss to his lips. He tastes like love and a happy future. When you pull away, you encapsulate his face in both your palms, regarding him like the sun and stars. “But you know, if we date you’ll never get away from my crazy family.”

Jungkook snorts, pressing his forehead to yours, “And miss Yoongi re-marrying off your grandparents tonight, the next year of Seokjin and Namjoon running circles around each other, and a lifetime of happiness?” his hands snake under your dress, finding purchase in your soft skin, “not a chance.”

#jungkook x reader #gcn23 #goldenclosetnet #btsghostie #kwritersworldnet #jungkook fic #jungkook fluff #jungkook angst #bts fic #bts fanfic #bts fluff #bts angst

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mae-gi-writes · 4 years

Text

Take Me Back | Sunwoo (The Boyz)

Requested by anon! You broke up with Sunwoo because of long distance and he’s hated you ever since. When you meet up after three years, feelings resurface.

Genre: angst, ex to lovers au, enemies to lovers kinda, fluffy ending.

A/N: JESUS i know I said that I don’t have time because I LITERALLY DON’T. So don’t ask me why all this inspiration comes to me when I can’t even sit down to write -- I write on the way to and from work, it’s so sad -- so yeah. I hope you enjoy <3 <3

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Breaking up because of long distance was one of the biggest regrets of your life. The fact that you had to let him go because it was just getting too hard for your heart to cope was, in itself, heartbreaking. But you figured that it could get better, for the both of you, if you moved on with your lives without being tied at the hip with someone that was a continent away.

Except, the moment you had murmured your silent goodbyes, you had broken down into the most horrible, heartbreaking sobs that had ravaged your entire body. You cried and cried and cried, and wouldn't stop. The tears just wouldn't stop even when you told yourself that it was better this way, that he'd find someone better, stronger, it did nothing to ease the burning pain pulling your heartstrings apart.

One thing was for sure, Sunwoo's behaviour made things much easier. He'd grown distant first, curt and cold and isolating you, though you knew deep down it was a way to protect his own heart from the damage you'd inflicted on him.

But then he started ignoring your messages, spoke rudely whenever you did catch him on the phone. While you tried being understanding the first few times, you soon grew frustrated and annoyed that he'd act so childishly. The man you had once loved with all your heart had now been reduced to nothing but someone who kept digging holes into your heart.

You juggled the thought of asking him whether he hated your guts for what you did. You wouldn't judge him. On the contrary, you'd understand.

But you hadn't. Merely because the thought of losing him forever pained you.

Fast forward three years and here you were, sitting in a restaurant with a group of your high school friends, Sunwoo included. He'd nodded curtly at your appearance but did nothing more, causing your heart to squeeze in pain at the nostalgia kicking through your stomach.

"It's been years, Y/N. And you look the same," one of your good friends, Eric, jovially stated with a wink, already down by a few beers.

"Thanks Eric, I'll take that as a compliment."

"Don't go hitting on Sunwoo's ex with him right here," your classmate Raina said, "let's not end this dinner in a fight."

"I don't think Sunwoo minds," you mumbled loud enough for it to reach everyone's ears.

"You're right, I don't care," Sunwoo's voice -- still as deep, still as gorgeously beautiful and rough. An obvious contrast to the iciness of his words like pricks aimed at your heart.

You tried your best to brush off his comment, turning to Raina to ask her about any updates about her love life.

As the night wore on and people fell into deeper conversation, others left with excuses that they had spouses to return to, families waiting for them. Until there's only you and Eric in a corner, with Sunwoo at the bar, chatting up a gorgeous girl that looked like she had just walked out of a magazine spread.

"Still doesn't wanna talk huh?" Eric took a swig of his drink.

You shook your head, "he hates me, Eric."

"No he doesn't."

"Yes, he does.He can't even look at me in the eye without scowling."

"Bollocks. You just don't see it."

"What's there to see?" You scoffed, "if killing me was legal he would've done it ages ago."

Hesitating slightly, Eric takes another swig of his drink before replying, "look, I can't speak for him. But...you'll just have to talk to him yourself."

"Fuck no, I'm not doing that," you crossed your arms over your chest.

"Stubbornness never looked good on anyone."

You pulled out your tongue in response.

"Childish," Eric's eyebrow rose in amusement. Before you could defend yourself though, the said man turned to call out Sunwoo's name and you watched in growing horror as Sunwoo walked over to your table.

"Right," Eric jumped up from his seat as though it was on fire, "Sunwoo, keep her company. I'm off to see my girlfriend."

"What? No--" but Eric was already out of the door before Sunwoo's protests were heard, resulting in an awkward air hanging off your table the moment he turned, causing you to quickly drop your eyes to the beer you were nursing.

"You don't have to stay here," came your mumble.

You felt him shift in his seat before he said, "even if I am, I'm not doing this for you."

"I know," you shot back, gaze flitting up to clash with his mahogany orbs, ones that you remembered held so much love and tenderness before. They were now cold, dark with silent seething anger. You continued, "I know you're not. I never asked you to."

"Then stopping looking at me like that," he snapped, "you of all people should know how tough this is for me."

"Sunwoo, it's been three years--"

"Don't," he cut you off with a hiss, "talk about that."

Rage started to bubble in your stomach, "I don't understand whether you hate me, or whether you’ve just turned into this rude annoying person that nobody can stand.”

He seemed to have been slapped by your statement, stayed silent for a few minutes as he clasped his drink a little tighter.

Knowing Sunwoo, he was probably silently seething from what you'd just said. Your own fingers clenched around your beer, hating how easily he could upset you even after all these years.

When he spoke next, his alto was slightly softer, a little less harsh on you, "I don't hate you."

"Doesn't seem like it to me."

There was a pause in which you managed to recollect your emotions, the anger simmering down to cold remorse at how badly you had left things.

"I'm sorry," you murmured out, avoiding his eyes in case he saw the pain that consumed you, "I know it's not easy for you. It's not easy for me either."

"I don't hate you, Y/N," Sunwoo's alto was gentle this time, without any of the malice of the earlier hour, "I...It just hurts me, every time I see you I can't stop thinking of what we were before. I--" he shifted and you managed to lift your orbs up to his, only to see guilt swimming through his as he choked out, "I miss you."

Emotion tightened your chest. Tears rushed to your eyes, "I miss you too."

You stayed unmoving, your eyes saying everything that your words couldn't. The music boomed around you, filled the empty silence that would've swallowed you whole otherwise.

When you felt your ex-boyfriend move in your peripheral, you glanced at him, noticing for the first time the tired lines around his eyes. What looked like resignation was set on his face.

And then he was pushing his hair back, muttering a string of excuses about how he couldn't do this anymore before he walked right out of the bar, with you gaping at his retreating form.

"Sunwoo! Hey--" you scrambled up to chase after him, stumbling over your feet as you gripped your bag clumsily. Running out into the street to see him already steps ahead of you, you quickly jogged up to his frame, not taking into account the nervous fluttering through your chest.

"Hey, wait! Sunwoo!" You gripped onto his arm and pulled him back. He resisted.

You started blurting things out anyway, desperate to make things right, desperate to take away the pain he felt.

"Sunwoo I'm sorry," you stumbled on as he quickened his stride, "I never--I never meant to hurt you, I-- I thought that it was best for both of us at the time, I didn't--" your words were choked, laced with emotion, "I didn't know how hard it would be."

He stopped so abruptly you almost walked into his back.

His shoulders shook as he spoke, "when we broke up, I couldn't stop thinking. Did I do something wrong? Should I have done more?" He took a breath, "I wasn't living, Y/N. I barely ate. I kept seeing you everywhere I went. It was-- it was horrible," his alto broke at the last word.

You took a step closer. Tentative. Hesitant. Hands tightened into fists.

He continued, "and it never got better. I thought it would. That's what they all said. But three years have passed. Three years and I still feel like I lost the most precious fucking thing in my life and I can't live with myself because of that."

You couldn't feel your heart, which was tightening with pain and sympathy that mirrored his words. Memories of you crying into your pillow as you willed all of your love to disappear, memories of the dull ache stretching across your ribs because you had cried too much.

You opened your mouth, an apology on the tip of your tongue, when Sunwoo swivelled around so fast you barely blinked, his hands finding your shoulders in a tight grip.

"Y/N," His eyes were red and red-rimmed as they searched yours in growing desperation, "look Y/N, what I had-- what we had, I miss that. I miss us. Please, I--" swallowing thickly as his grip tightened on you, he continued, "you can do anything. Anything, Y/N. Break me. Use me. Do whatever the fuck you want but just-- just--" his chest heaved with a shaky inhale, a sob echoing from his throat, "just let me be yours again."

The silence that followed was deafening. You couldn't believe your ears. Your heart beat so loud you felt it vibrate against your ribcage.

His chest heaved, his breaths coming out short and static as he stared at you, waiting, hoping.

There were so many things, so many things you wished to say at this very moment, so many things that you had regretted the moment you had parted ways with this amazing man.

And now, to hear that he wanted you back, that he was still undoubtedly, irrevocably in love with you was enough to bring fresh tears to your eyes as another wave of pure hope crashed through your heart and flooding it with light.

"Y/N," Sunwoo searched your eyes, "say something--"

You did. Jumped up to press your mouth against his.

He stumbled, hands finding purchase at your waist.

And when he kissed you back, all thoughts flew out of your head only to leave Sunwoo's taste engulfing your entire being like you had never stopped loving him from the first day you met.

It was pure, utter bliss. It was like finding the lost lover that had parted ways with you at sea. Sunwoo's mouth was hard on your own as he moved with the same grace, the same fluidity that left you breathless. His grip tightened, fingers sliding under the hem of your shirt to rest on your lower back as sparks ignited beneath your half-closed lids. Everything came crashing back; the memories, the happiness, the giddy excitement that erupted in the form of goosebumps and electrical sizzles over your limbs whenever Sunwoo kissed you.

It had never stopped. And at this very moment, you wondered briefly why you had forced him away when your heart was still irrevocably his.

One hand coming up to cup your jaw, he proceeded to tilt your head back to suckle onto your lower lip, the action causing a gasp to die in your throat while your hands tightened around his neck, pulling him even closer if that was possible.

Sunwoo's chest rumbled with a choked up moan, tongue darting out to meet yours halfway while a soft whimper echoed through your throat. You tried to match his movements, to kiss back as passionately as he was kissing you. But it was almost like Sunwoo was trying his best to make up for all the time you's spent apart, his mouth permanently pressed on yours and when you turned to catch your breath, he kissed your cheek, the corner of your eye, pulling you into him to imprint another kiss at the base of your neck.

You shuddered with emotion, body lighting up on fire and heat pooling through your stomach. Turning your head back until your noses brushed, your breath caught when your eyes locked, for Sunwoo's gaze was one of fierce, intense affection, as though you were something he'd sworn to protect his whole life.

"Don't," his gaze softened, thumb brushing your lower lip, "don’t ever leave me again, I--” his own lips trembled, "I don't know how...how I'll live with myself if you do."

You knew that words were going to be useless at this point, so you just nodded, biting down on your lower lip as he leaned in and dropped a kiss near your temple.

It was weird after so long, to have his body so close and his scent overwhelming your senses, a reminder of many long nights where you'd cuddled up to sleep on his chest. Just the memory made your lips tilt into a soft amile.

That grabbed his attention, "what are you thinking about?" He murmured.

"About you," your soft maroon clash with his intense dark chocolate, "about how stupid it was to have given up on us, because all this time apart feels like a waste. And I feel so stupid."

"It's not your fault Y/N," he smoothed a hand over the side of your head as his gaze softened, "there were so many things working against us. And maybe-- maybe it was right, at this time."

Your head tilted upwards to watch him. You felt his fingers, absentmindedly drumming against your lower back and igniting a line of sparks up your spine.

He continued, "I wouldn't have known, how important you were to me, how you filled up such a major part of my life--Oh shit. You're crying?" He was quick to catch your incoming tear with his thumb, panic flashing through his features, "Y/N? What is it? What did I say?”

“Nothing, it’s nothing I just--I’m so sorry I broke up with you,” you blurted out as silent tears trailed down your cheeks. Shaking your head and looking up into his maroon orbs, you impulsively reached up to cup his face with your hands. Lucky, your subconscious chanted. You were lucky to have someone like him.

"Come here,” You didn’t protest when Sunwoo’s arms tugged you into his broad chest -- was it broader? You felt like it was-- before his head rested atop yours. Another softest of pecks was imprinted atop your forehead, then your nose, before he dipped his head for a chaste kiss upon your mouth.

It felt like a promise. It felt like a message conveyed from him to you, that he wasn’t about to let go, prompted even more when he wound his arms around your frame in a firm, yet gentle hug.

You pillowed your head against his chest, closed your eyes, and counted all your blessings.

You were definitely counting Sunwoo as one. And you’d make sure that you wouldn’t be as foolish as to let go of him ever again.

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lubdubsworld · 3 years

Text

Better Man.

~~~~~~~~~~~~`Just to see you smile, I’d do anything. ~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~

Taehyung x Oc

Rated 18 +

Post Divorce, Getting Back Together, Second chances, Angst.

Chapter 1 Chapter 2 Chapter 3 Chapter 4

Chapter 5

Do you ever truly know what someone is feeling?

You could spend decades , breathing the same air, hands held , your fingers brushing ....connected physically and even mentally but a person’s emotions, they’re hidden away.

You only ever know what they’re willing to show .

And yet,

all of us build relationships, convinced that we know exactly what the other person will feel when we act a certain way. Buying her flowers will make happy....visiting him at work will take away that little bit of stress.

But sometimes, what we think someone feels, may not be what they truly feel.

And that’s when your actions, well intended actions..... end up with disastrous consequences.

~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~

“So....last night...” Jungkook’s teasing voice did nothing to ease the pounding in my head.

“I do believe you promised not to tease me about it if I drank two glasses of water, which I did by the way.” I told him firmly, trying to bring the words on my planner into focus as i squinted. Three meeting. Each two hours long.

kill me now.

“I wanted to ask HR to give you the day off but you have quite a schedule today. “ He said casually, leaning over me to peer into the planner . I glanced at his wrist resting on the table, the expensive rolex showing that it was a little past 9.

“ We’re planning out the Christmas campaign first and I have a meeting with Taehyung’s team in the afternoon so we can go over the contract see if they have any requirements and then the social media team in the evening at four to discuss promos and revamping the website.” I glanced up at him.

He gave me a smile before casually leaning down, lightly gripping my chin and tilting my face up. I felt the brush of his lips against mine, fleeting and gentle.

‘You’re beautiful.” He smiled.

I blinked.

And then took a deep breath.

“Your wife...” I said softly. “ I saw her today.”

Jungkook went completely still at that.

“She was waiting in the lobby on my way up. I didn’t know who you were married to and I was a little shocked and also little upset because....” I glanced at him. “ She was my best friend in college. “

Jungkook swore.

“Fuck.. I told her to stay the fuck away from my company. Did she say something to you?”

i shook my head.

“I didn’t greet her because I wasn’t sure if she remembered me. And I wasn’t sure if i was remembering her right. i didn’t know she was your wife till i heard someone mention it in the elevator on my way up. Did you know that she and i knew each other?”

Jungkook looked just a little guilty.

“When you first joined the company, she saw your resume on my cvomputer. told me a lot about you. She remembers you. Fondly. She wanted to come meet you but...things happened. “ He shrugged.

Things like infidelity and divorces .

“Ahh...” I smiled. “ Tell me i wasn’t another way to get back at your ex wife, Jeon Jungkook ssi...”

He made a noise of protest.

“no... No of course not Christ...it’s just...I’ll admit she made me curious about you. She spoke of you being spontaneous and fun and wild and I’d seen you as this demure, elegant woman in the office. i was curious. I wanted to know which one was the real you. “

“Were you curious before she cheated....or after?”

“ Jang Mi...this isn’t what it looks like .. I’m done with her. She fucked my best buddy and ruined my fucking life...” He sounded pained.

I frowned.

“It’s hard to believe she would do something like that. The Aera i remember had a very strong moral compass.”

“Yeah well, apparently, you can live whole entire lives with someone and never really know the person. Listen, do we really have to talk about my ex wife?” He asked, eyes shining with discomfort.

I shrugged.

“I’m not fond of drama. I won’t tangle myself in a relationship that risks hurting a lot of people Jungkook. That’s just not the kind of person I am. I’m sorry.”

He made a noise of impatience, shaking his head.

“We won’t be hurting anyone... We have fun together. We like each other. We’re attracted to each other...that’s all that matters....” He said sharply.

“ If we were in our twenties , without kids ....maybe. But that's not how it is now. I have a son, you have a daughter and I think I’m not completely over my marriage yet.” I said softly.

He froze.

“And i don’t think you’re completely over your wife either.” I smiled.

He glared at me.

“Ex-wife.” He snarled.

“She makes you feel things, Jungkook. You need to sort that out before you start something new with someone else. I’m only saying this because we’re old enough not to

He growled and punched the desk.

“God, how can she keep ruining my life even when she’s out of it.” He muttered, stepping away from me and moving to the door.

I watched him storm out of my office and bit my lip.

~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~

By the time evening rolled around, I was exhausted. But the day had been productive and I was happy because the contract had been finalized, the theme had been decided and we’d also spent an amazing three hours redesigning the website. Although it wasn’t in my job description I had studied web design in college and the creative department always welcomed my inputs.

“You’re in a good mood...” Taehyung’s voice was a complete surprise and I turned to him, shocked. He was dressed in a black t shirt and blue jeans and sneakers and looked a whole decade younger.

I felt affection rise up my throat so fast I nearly choked.

“What are you doing here?”

“My agent told me you guys were incredibly cooperative today. She also told me you were quite possibly the loveliest woman she’s ever met and that I’m an idiot to have let you go.” He smiled.

I laughed, shaking my head and my gaze shifted to the small bunch of tiger lilies in his hand.

I felt warmth bloom in my chest.

“You remembered.” I said softly, pleased.

“Thirteen years since our first date. The lily to my tiger. ” He held the flowers to me and I grinned, pressing the flowers to my chest.

“Man I feel old.” I muttered.

“You are old.” Tae grinned and i grimaced, before tossing him a glare. .

“You’re supposed to say I still look as beautiful as i did thirteen years ago.” I said.

“But you don.t” He grinned impishly. “ You look a billion times more beautiful.”

I felt the atmosphere shift, the air charged with something dangerous and i looked away. Usually, this was when I would laugh and throw my arms around him. Pull him close and press my lips against his , slip my fingers into his t shirt and trace the skin of his back. Feel his hands on my waist as he lifted me up to twirl me around and kiss me just like that.

How often had we kissed that way? Thirteen years is a long time to count the number of kisses we’d shared.

We both stayed quiet, looking anywhere but at each other.

“I...there’s a reason I came.” He said finally.

I glanced at him.

“Oh?”

“The lawyer. Ms. Lee she ... recommended a relationship counselor”

I blinked, my breath catching in my throat.

“Taehyung we’re-”

“Just hear me out. Its not mandatory and it won’t affect the divorce in anyway. its just something the court offers all couples going through a divorce and we’re free to refuse it. “

“Did you?” I asked.

“Did I what?”

“Refuse it. Did you tell her no?”

He stared at me.

“No.” He said finally.

I exhaled sharply.

“Wow.” I whispered, feeling jittery and unbalanced. He sighed and came closer, reaching out to lightly grip my wrists. I let him tug me closer into a hug and held him tight, my heart pounding with anxiety.

“Mia.... I just... I’m not saying we should try to fix this.... relationship.” He said softly, eyes gentle and pleading, “ I just think this whole thing has taken a toll on both of us and maybe we can heal better if we get the help of a professional. Come out of this with closure. Instead of battling guilt and regrets everyday. Just ....it could help us move on. Don’t you think?”

You could never really tell what the other person is feeling.

I couldn’t tell what Taehyung was feeling right now?

Hope ?

Hope that we would fix our marriage....

or maybe hope that he would finally move on from me.. Maybe this whole thing was his final attempt to end things with me for good. So he could walk out of my life forever without any lingering guilt or regret.

I would never know.

I clung to him harder and somehow the pain of the entire two years we’d been apart, rammed into me at once.

I choked on a sob. Breathing became difficult and I felt myself gasping for air.

“Mia?” Taehyung’s panicked voice was the last sane thought that registered.

~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~

“Are you sure you’re going to be okay? I can stay the night if you want. I’ll sleep in the spare bedroom . ” Taehyung whispered, seated on the warm fluffy blanket that he’d managed to dig out of the closet in the spare bedroom. i was already tucked into the bed, fingers clutching the satin lined edges .

i shook my head.

“I know how much you need your gazillion pillows. Go on... I’ll be fine.”

“i feel terrible. i pushed you into a panic attack.”

I waved off the guilty words.

“You didn’t . i was already a little frayed and i guess i haven’t really been processing all the stuff between us the way i should have. i just got a little overwhelmed.”

A panic attack. At the age of 32. The last time i had one I was twenty four. I wanted to crawl into the bed and never resurface.

Taehyung’s gentle fingers , stroking my cheek brought me out of my own head.

“I was so scared.” He said softly and my heart ached.

“I’m sorry i scared you.” I said apologetically, gripping his wrists lightly and stroking the skin there with my thumb.

“I really want to stay. i don’t think I’ll be able to sleep if I go home right now.” He whispered.

I bit my lips.

“Okay... but... You need to hug something. To sleep. “

He grinned at that.

“I’m old enough to survive one night without a pillow, Mia .” he chuckled.

I flushed, sinking deeper into the covers.

“Okay.”

“You don’t have to worry about the counselor thing. I’ll tell Lee we don’t want to do any-”

“No!!” I said quickly, a lot louder than I’d intended.

Taehyung blinked.

“I just... I realized that I haven’t been dealing with any of this...the right way. I’m so confused and disoriented all the time and I .. I don’t mind getting some help. To sort things out. Just for myself you know...without the pressure of trying to fix...well us.” I finished .

Taehyung gave me a wide smile before bending down and kissing my forehead.

“ Okay, Mia mine. Sleep well, and I’ll see you in the morning.”

~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~`

#taehyung fic #taehyung smut #taehyung fanfic #bts smut #bts fic

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pretend-writer · 4 years

Text

Better Than Revenge (Hargreeves x sibling!reader)

Summary: Y/N’s boyfriend broke up with her unexpectedly and the Hargreeves goes and finds out the truth.

Pairing: Hargreeves x sibling!reader

Title Reference: Better Than Revenge x Taylor Swift

Word Count: 2.1k words

Warning: swearing, violence

✤ · ✤ · ✤ · ✤ · ✤

It was all so sudden, I thought that me and him were alright. We've just got back from a trip couple of days ago, taking cute couple pictures and posting it on social media.

Every night, he told me that he loved me and he would never let me go. It took us hours to even hop out of the hotel bed because he would want to cuddle with me all morning. All the love he shared that I thought was genuine didn't mean anything to him.

Was a blind? Was I too naive? Should I have known me and him were in a fake relationship this whole time? Did I waste a year and a half of my life thinking that he loved me? I didn't know what was real anymore.

The only truth that came out of this was that my boyfriend and I were over with. Everything else was a blur.

'Y/N?' Allison tapped me on my shoulder. 'Are you coming inside?'

I've been in my head all day since I got the breakup text from my boyfriend, I totally forgot that I was outside sitting next to Ben's memorial statue.

As I continued to stare at the ground, I shook my head. 'No, thanks.'

'It's about to rain, you should come inside.' Allison still sat beside me even with the complicated weather outside, concerned as she knew something was wrong with her sister. 'What's wrong?'

'You know the best days of my life was supposed to be this trip with my boyfriend?' I slightly chuckled, feeling stupid about myself as I said those words at loud. 'Turns out I was wrong.'

'What did John do?'

I bit my lips and sighed; I couldn't even blame him really. 'It's all my fault. For believing that this was all true, for thinking that he was happy with the relationship. I'm so fucking stupid.'

'What did he say to you?'

'He said enough.'

Allison quickly stood up and left my side. 'I'll be inside, come join me soon okay?'

✤ · ✤ · ✤ · ✤ · ✤

Allison POV;

The things that Y/N said hit a nerve. I already knew something was not right with the relationship. There was always something off with John but I figured if Y/N trusted him, I should too.

I've should've trusted my guts.

It was one thing to hurt my sister's feelings but to make Y/N sad to a point where she sat in the rain made me very upset and angry.

Y/N was the cheeriest one out of the bunch, constantly making us smile when we're down. Her smile was how we all got through the day, especially during our childhood with our so-called father.

It always took a lot for her to get mad or upset about anything. This already proved that John had something to hide and I would do anything to find out what was going on with his life.

I didn't want to leave Y/N alone under the dark, gray clouds but she seemed as though she was not going anywhere at all. I gave a kiss on the top of head before I walked back into the building.

'What's wrong with her?' Diego peeked through the window, watching Y/N leaning next to Ben's statue.

'John broke up with her and I'm going to find out exactly why.' I flared my nose, infuriated about this situation between my sister and her ex-boyfriend.

Diego furrowed his eyebrows, confused about everything. 'W-wait, John and her broke up? Didn't they just come back from their cute little trip?'

'He's a fucking liar is what it is. I swe-'

'Allison, are you sure he's a prick?' Diego tried to be civil which I completely understood but something about my instincts told me otherwise. 'We have zero proof of why this man broke up with Y/N.'

'That's what I'm trying to find out. I just don't trust him. It doesn't make any sense at all.' I rolled my eyes, taking a deep breath. 'You can watch Y/N while I go do some digging.'

Diego chuckled, 'Are you kidding me? I'm coming with you. Let's expose this man.'

✤ · ✤ · ✤ · ✤ · ✤

Diego POV;

Luther, Vanya and Five were left with Y/N at home to make sure she was comfortable and feeling better. We also had to be extra careful about Y/N finding out about us stalking her old boyfriend.

If Y/N even got a hint about me, Klaus and Allison's whereabouts, her emotions will get the best of her and she will not hesitate to use her ultrasonic scream to try to get to us.

Y/N was the most level headed out of all the Hargreeves but her number one pet peeve was people digging through private lives. Her finding out the truth especially in the fragile state she was in would ruin us.

And seeing her hatred towards paparazzi and the way she fought them off on her off days as Number Eight, I would never want to be Y/N's enemy.

Which was why Allison, Klaus and I, the mouthy triggering siblings had to leave the house. Klaus and I privately argued that Five should've been with us but with his smart mouth, we knew he was going to use his "genius brain" as an excuse to stay and distract Y/N.

Klaus didn't like that, given the fact that Y/N and him were tight like glue. But everyone knew that Klaus was the number one person that needed to leave the house.

'Why can't I stay with Y/N?' Klaus whined, 'You know I suck at these investigating type missions. I could be a great caregiver to our sweet sister. I would give her some warm tea-'

'We haven't even pulled over to John's house and you're already running your mouth. That's why.' I turned around toward Klaus who was laying down in the back of the car as Allison drove my car. 'You'd be the first one to tell Y/N our secret and we can't risk that, dude.'

Allison looked at our brother from the mirror, smiling. 'Don't worry Klaus, she will be fine. I promise.'

✤ · ✤ · ✤ · ✤ · ✤

Klaus POV;

The car suddenly stopped moving, Allison and Diego unbuckled their seatbelts. Ben, who was squished to the side where my legs rested rolled his eyes. 'You could've saved me some space for me to sit.'

'You're a ghost, why does it matter?' I replied back to him, I didn't think that he'd cramp up while I laid down in the back. 'Besides, my legs were on your lap so you should be fine.'

'Who are you talking to?' Diego asked me as he watched me get out of the car.

'Nobody.'

Ben yelled, just like he always does whenever I claim that I talk to myself. He had to realize we were here for Y/N, Ben can have his moment to shine some other time.

Diego, Ben and I followed Allison into John's house. Y/N used to bring Allison and I here often to hang out with John, we knew where he hid his spare key.

'Let's split up and look for some clues. It's got to be in here somewhere.' Allison mumbled, walking upstairs.

'Psst, Klaus!' Diego pointed behind him, 'You want to partner up? Maybe if we do it together it'll be faster.'

'Why are you whispering? The man isn't even here.' I chuckled at my brother, 'I think working together would take more time.'

Diego hissed, 'Fine! Be that way and go with your imaginary friend.'

'Why are you so upset? You really love me, don't you Diego?'

He pulled out his knife, looking at me intensely without saying any word. I knew Diego was sensitive but I didn't think that would trigger him to throw a knife at my face.

'I'm sorr-' before I was able to finish my apology, Diego struck his knife next to my head, hearing a loud groan from behind.

'Allison! I got him!' Diego shouted as he quickly got up and ran past me. I turned around and saw John lying on the ground, holding his shoulder in pain.

'What are you crazy fuckers doing here.' John winched.

Diego pulled the knife out of him, wiping the blood off with John's shirt before he put it back on his harness. 'Given the circumstances, I do not appreciate your tone dude.'

'See, I knew you Hargreeves were crazy. I don't know how I put up with you and your sister for nearly two years.'

'Now that's when you stop talking.' Diego stuck his finger into his knife wound, making John scream louder than he was before. 'I'm telling you, shut the fuck up before we do more harm.'

'Okay, okay!' John yelled, still grabbing onto his shoulder. All I could think about was how infected his shoulder was going to be after all this mess.

As I stared at John's wound, I went back to thinking about my poor sister. 'Why did you break up with Y/N?'

✤ · ✤ · ✤ · ✤ · ✤

Y/N’s POV;

'Rock, paper, scissors, shoot.' Luther and Vanya said in sync. They have been at it for about an hour now, I've never seen two human beings intrigued in this boring game before.

Five just stared at them with an angry face like always, all he has been doing was mumbling to himself and complaining about something I couldn't hear from here.

'What are you guys doing exactly?' I questioned my brothers and sister that has been in the living room with me for over an hour doing nothing.

At first it was odd that they were sitting with me, quiet and not saying a word but I didn't question anything. Now it was weird of them to be here as if they were keeping an eye on me.

'Just keeping you company.' Luther grinned, 'Do you need anything?'

'No, thanks.' I gave him a soft smile, asking an additional question. 'Did Allison say anything to you guys?'

I was in such an emotional state, I blurted the end of my relationship to Allison without thinking of anything. What happened between me and John was over, clearly over and if he wanted that I couldn't say no.

Knowing how overprotective Allison can get of me, I was worried what trouble she got herself into. I hoped she wasn't doing what I thought she might be doing.

'Nope, nothing.' Five, Luther and Vanya all said in the same tone.

'Y/N!' I heard Klaus screaming from the front door, rushing inside to come see me. 'He's a fucking dickhead!'

'Who?' I asked Klaus as he was trying to catch a breath, leaning into the couch to rest.

'Your fucking boyfriend, that's who.' Diego walked in right behind Klaus, anger flushed all over his face.

Allison rolled her eyes, hitting Diego's shoulder while standing next to him. 'You don't have to say it like that, geez.'

'What did you guys find at his house?' Luther asked.

'At his hou-' I looked at the three of them, confused. 'What did you guys do?'

'While Vanya, Luther and I were here distracting you Klaus, Allison and Diego went to John's house to find clues as to why he broke up with you.' Five summarized, with a big smirk on his face.

My eye shifted towards Allison, slowly shaking my head. 'You know how I feel about this.'

'Hear me out, okay? He-'

Diego cut Allison off, 'He had a ultrasound picture in his hand Y/N. John is a fucking asshole and I was so close to punchin-'

'He what?' Luther yelled, immediately standing up and towering over everybody. 'Where is he right now?'

'Laying down on his living room floor because Diego threw a knife through his shoulder.' Klaus added.

'Y/N, I'm so sorry okay? But I had to go see for myself and you being sad is the last thing I want to see.' Allison took a step closer to me. 'You we're blaming yourself about this breakup and I didn't want you to do that. That's why I went.'

There were no words left to say; I felt angry, sad, disappointed that my boyfriend of almost two years had a different girl the whole time. John was even about to have a family with some other woman.

I clenched my first as I thought about John, the more flashbacks I had of our "happy times" the angrier I got.

My siblings started to notice the change of my expressions. Klaus' eyes widened, 'Are you okay Y/N?'

'Come on guys, let's go get him.' I took my jacket from the couch, quickly putting them on as I walked towards the front door. All my siblings started to cheer as they walked next to me, Diego and Klaus hugging me from each side.

'Let's get this son of a bitch!' Diego screamed with his fist in the air.

#hargreeves x sibling!reader #n.8 x reader #number eight!reader #n8!reader #tua fics #tua oneshot #the umbrella academy oneshot #the umbrella academy fic #diego hargreeves x reader #luther hargreeves x reader #allison hargreeves x reader #klaus hargreeves x reader #vanya hargreeves x reader #ben hargreeves x reader #five hargreeves x reader #hargreeves x sister!reader

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pucksnsticksnhockeyboys · 3 years

Text

homesick

summary: when you’re homesick near the holidays, Quinn does his best to make you feel at home with him and a cup of cocoa.

word count: 2.4k

note from the writer: day two! gotta say, this one was very self indulgent / masterposts of the Christmas fics

tagging: @bqstqnbruin @broadstbroskis @laurenairay @calgarycanuck @sorryjustafangirl @slapshot-to-the-heart @cthoodsthetic @tayella13 @wastedheartcth @kiedhara / add yourself to my Christmas fic taglist

Moving far away from your hometown had always been the plan. It was a fresh start, with new people, sights, and opportunities.

But, no matter how much you loved living away from home, you really missed it sometimes.

The Christmas season had long arrived in full force, decorations in every window and holiday songs on repeat in every department store. And usually you loved it, you were the first person to put up the lights and the last one to take them down in the new year. But it was your first Christmas away from home; work keeping you in Vancouver when all you wanted was the nostalgic familiarity of the holidays in your hometown.

As a result, you turned into a bit of a grump. Declining invites to go out with friends and opting to stay inside and mope by yourself. Really, it was doing nothing to help the feeling of homesickness, but you’d never admit that to yourself.

Quinn caught onto this; he was always sperceptive of your changing moods even before you started dating. So once you sent your message telling Jake and the rest of the group to go bar hopping without you, it only took Quinn half an hour to show up unannounced on your doorstep.

A knock drew your attention from the corny Hallmark movie you had been watching, and you hit pause on the dramatic confession of love. The woman who never had time for romance after moving to the big city to pursue her dreams could wait to tell the hardworking man from her hometown how she felt. On your doorstep was the man who managed to capture your own heart, even if you hadn’t quite told him in so many words yet.

“Hey, I didn’t realize we had plans tonight?” You told Quinn, nonetheless opening the door wider and letting him in. He ducked down to give you a kiss before replying, and it was only after he had shuffled all the way into your apartment did you notice the takeout bag in his hand.

“We didn’t, but I wanted to see you.” He shrugged a shoulder, making his way into your kitchen while you shut and locked the front door behind him. When you finally caught up to him, he was pulling containers of food out of the bag, and when you recognized the company’s logo, you looked at your boyfriend suspiciously.

“You ordered from Kimmy’s; you never order from Kimmy’s.” You confronted him, his answering laugh echoing throughout the otherwise quiet apartment. It was the old argument between the two of you; you loved Kimmy’s, Quinn loved Lucy’s. They had the same food and were in theory the same place, but you swore Kimmy’s way better. Even when you told Quinn to order from Kimmy’s, he always, without fail, came back with Lucy’s instead.

Except for tonight, apparently.

Quinn gave you a sheepish look and stopped pulling food out the bag, and instead opened his arms for a hug. Confused but not wanting to pass up the opportunity to be held by your favorite guy, you complied, and his arms came around you to hold you tight.

“I know you’ve been sad about not being able to go home lately.” He started, rocking you back and forth. You didn’t protest his statement, because there was nothing to object to. Instead, you waited for him to finish. “So I figured that we could have your favorite takeout, and then watch some Christmas movies. I also have a surprise for later.”

“This isn’t the surprise?” You questioned with a grin, tilting your head up to look at him whilst staying in his arms. A swell of emotions took over you, but the one that hit you squarely in the chest was the overwhelming desire to tell Quinn you loved him.

And you did love him. You loved that he knew when you were upset and when you needed a pick-me-up movie night. You loved the way he smiled and the way he laughed. The way he made you go to all of his home games when you were free and called you his good luck charm, win or lose. You loved him with your very being, and you had known for a while that you loved him, but you had been waiting for the perfect moment to tell him.

“No, this isn’t the surprise.” He chuckled, dropping a kiss to your forehead before turning to finish getting the food out of the bag. You slipped away to grab two plates, along with silverware, moving seamlessly with Quinn until you were sitting on your couch with him.

“What movie did you want to watch?” You asked, reaching for the remote to turn off the cheesy Hallmark movie you had all but forgotten about.

“This is your cheer up movie, you pick.” Quinn told you with a shrug, already digging into his plate. You rolled your eyes at his smile, biting back the joke about how he shouldn’t talk with his mouth full. Wasting little time, you pulled up a classic—Love, Actually.

“It’s a sappy romance movie kind of night.” You told Quinn decidedly, and he didn’t put up an argument. Settling back into your seat, you felt yourself start to feel a little bit better about not being able to spend Christmas back home. After all, you couldn’t worry about much with Quinn by your side.

By the time Colin Firth was jumping into the lake to save his novel, Quinn got up from the couch and whispered a quiet ‘I’ll be right back’ before slipping into the kitchen. You tried your very best, but you couldn’t focus on the movie any longer and instead you found yourself listening to your boyfriend doing something in your kitchen. Ratting dishes, running water, and the sound of your microwave—for the life of you, you couldn’t figure out what he was up to.

“Do you need any help?” You called after a moment, a smile toying on your lips as you heard Quinn let out a quiet curse. Part of you wondered if you should be a little more concerned, knowing his lack of domestic skills could very well lead to something disastrous, but you trusted him enough to tell you if something went awry.

“No, I got it.” He replied, and just then he was reemerging with two mugs of hot cocoa, decked out with marshmallows and candy canes that he must have snuck in with the takeout.

“You’re really pulling out all the stops, huh, Huggy?” You teased, watching with mirth as he rolled his eyes playfully at the nickname. You spent too much time with his teammates, but you had to admit they were onto something with the teasing name. There was just something entirely too adorable about calling your boyfriend Huggy, especially when all he typically did in response was blush.

“Anything for you.” The comment was delivered in a light tone, but you and Quinn both heard the honesty that rang through the three simple words. Another set of three simple words made its way to the forefront of your mind, begging to be said. But instead, you chuckled quietly, most of your attention on the mug he was setting on the coffee table in front of you.

“Cheesy.”

“Hey, you said it was a sappy romance night.” He defended, settling back into his seat by your side. You didn’t respond right away, too busy taking a sip of the cocoa Quinn made. You could tell he was waiting for your reaction expectantly, and you gave him a proud smile when you realized it tasted perfectly fine.

“I love it.” You assured him, and with that final bit of convincing both of your attentions returned to the movie. You had to admit, as much as you felt like a grinch before, Quinn’s efforts to make you feel more at home thousands of miles away from your family were warming your heart.

Though, you wanted to say something a little bit different than ‘I love it.’

The movie continued and by the time credits were rolling, Quinn was on his feet and ushering you to the door with a grin. You complied, only after pouting your lips for a few short kisses that he readily supplied.

“So what’s the surprise?” You questioned, following Quinn’s actions by tugging on your coat. He chuckled, not taking the bait and revealing what he had planned just yet.

“I’m not telling you, but I got the idea from Brock.” He confessed, opening your front door for you. You shot him a teasing look, meeting his lopsided grin and feeling your heart swell in your chest. Following him out of your apartment, you couldn’t help the next comment that slipped past your lips.

“You’re taking romance advice from Brock now? Was Jake not available?” You joked, referencing his teammates’ mess of love lives. Jake was in a friends with benefits situation with someone he was falling for fast and you were pretty sure Brock was still in love with his ex from his hometown. Quinn shook his head in mirth at the chirp directed at your mutual friends, and instead of answering, he slipped his hand into yours.

“Well, it was my idea. Brock just told me where to go.” Was all he said on the topic, watching you lock your apartment door behind you. He filled you in on the latest jokes from his practice earlier in the day as you made your way out to his car. He was in the middle of a story about Petey’s sports car and not handling Vancouver’s winters by the time he opened your door for you and it was only after ten minutes of driving did you think to question him about where you were going once more.

“Huggy, where are we going?” You sighed dramatically. Even in the dark, you could tell he rolled his eyes playfully at the nickname.

“Why do you have to call me that?” He teasingly groaned, reaching over the center console to thread his fingers through yours. Giving his hand a squeeze, you chuckled at his mock annoyance.

“That’s not an answer.” You said in a sing-song to get your point across. It was Quinn’s turn to chuckle, the sound bringing a grin to your face and causing your heart to pick up in pace.

“You know how you said you wanted to go look at lights?” Quinn started, immediately piquing your attention and earning an excited gasp from you. He was smiling, clearly proud of himself and you felt your eagerness grow.

“You’re taking me to drive around and look at Christmas lights?” You sat up in your seat, turning to face your boyfriend with a hopeful look. He chuckled at your reaction, lifting your hand to his lips to press a kiss to the back of it as a form of answer. You could have sworn you felt your heart grow two sizes at the action, the three words you had yet to say to him begging to roll off your tongue.

“I remember you said that you always drive around your hometown with your family to look at the lights, so I figured we could do the same thing.” Quinn said as if it was something nonchalant like the weather, and not one of the sweetest things you had ever heard.

That was the tipping point.

“I love you.” You blurted before you could stop yourself. You felt the car swerve slightly as Quinn worked through his initial shock at your confession. He glanced at you, then, a broad smile on his face that helped calm your nerves slightly.

“Yeah?” He questioned with unrestrained glee in his tone. You nodded, watching as he pulled over onto the side of the road. As soon as he had the car in park, he was leaning over to your side and grabbing your face with both of his hands to connect your lips in a kiss that settled you completely.

He didn’t need to say the words back immediately, you felt them in the way he was kissing you, the way he was taking you to drive around and look at lights. You felt it in the way he bought your favorite takeout and let you watch your sappy romance movies. The way he knew you needed a night with him to help get over your homesickness.

You loved him and he loved you just the same.

“I love you, too.” He told you just that the moment he broke the kiss, the words mumbled against your lips with a sureness and honesty that you felt to your core. You were in love with Quinn and he loved you back, and with that knowledge you felt all your previous sadness about missing home disappear, because as long as you were with him you could make any place feel like home.

“Thank you.” You told him as he pulled back out onto the road and continued towards the neighborhood full of houses decorated to the nines with lights and other Christmas ornaments. Quinn gave you a confused look, though he was still wearing his same dopey smile he had since the moment you confessed your feelings to him. “For doing all of this, I mean.”

“Why wouldn’t I?” He said simply, and now that you had already said it once, your second I love you fell past your lips with much more ease and a lot less nerves. He repeated his earlier action of pressing a kiss to the back of your hand, and you couldn’t help but admire his profile that was currently bathed in white, red, and green lights from the decorations outside on the houses. His smile turned a little mischievous, but you barely noticed, too caught up in your love for him. “You’re supposed to be looking at the lights, you know. Not me.”

“I can’t help it.” You replied with a chuckle, finally dragging attention from him and out the window. The sights were truly beautiful, but you were looking at everything with rose tinted glasses now that you had finally confessed and knew he felt the same.

It was funny, you thought, that you moved so far away from home and yet the lights on the decorated houses could have been the ones in your hometown and you wouldn’t have known the difference. You still missed your family, of course, but with one glance to the man driving you around, it all felt a little bit more like home.

Being in love made it all a bit easier.

#Quinn hughes #Quinn hughes imagine #quinnn hughes x reader #vancouver canucks #vancouver canucks imagine #vancouver canucks x reader #nhl imagine #hockey imagine #12 days fics

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kookiesjoonies · 4 years

Text

risk it — jjk | nine.

risk it | nine: one more chance.

a/n: i know this update is kinda late, pls forgive me. xo

↠ main pairing: tattoo artist!jungkook x salon owner!reader

↠ side ships: namjin, vmin (fwb), hoseok x makeup artist!oc

↠ word count: 2.1k

↠ warnings: angst (duh lol), language

SERIES SUMMARY:

✧ a drunken text ends with you wrapped up in the arms of your ex-boyfriend. aka the man that you dumped two years prior, after he refused to marry you. suddenly, all of the feelings that you’d seemingly had buried come rushing back up to the surface, and you’re not sure how long you can ignore them.

Jungkook’s hands were gripped onto the steering wheel so tightly that his knuckles had begun to turn white. His lips were pursed, brows narrowed, and chest heaving with angry breaths as he drove toward your salon.

He had half a mind to turn around and drive in the opposite direction— to your apartment, where Yoongi was, and pummel him into the ground until he was bruised and bloody from head to toe.

But he wanted to see you more. He wanted to tell you exactly what he thought about you having sex with his ex best friend, and he wanted to know exactly what the two of you had done together.

Ever since Taehyung had sent that fucking picture in the group chat, it was all he could think about. He kept imagining Yoongi’s hands traveling up and down your body, Yoongi’s mouth trailing down your stomach, and every time he’d envision Yoongi fucking you into your mattress all he saw was red.

When he finally pulled into a parking spot outside of the front door, he took a deep breath and ran the palms of his hands down his face in an attempt to mentally prepare himself for what was to come.

The sign above the door read Kookie Cutters, and he couldn’t help but to shake his head as memories of the two of you together flooded back in.

He was lying next to you on your shared bed, one hand mindlessly on your breast (as it always seemed to be), while his other hand held the television remote.

You’d been trying to come up with a name for your business all afternoon, and at first, he was eager to help. But after you shot down all fifty of his suggestions, he’d resorted to just nodding and grunting as he let you ramble on.

“I want the name to be something unique, yet personal. Something that nobody else has thought of.”

He nodded his head in agreement, attention more focused on the soccer game in front of him than on your words.

You rolled your eyes, plucking a pillow from behind his head and swatting him with it.

“Hey! I was listening!” He insisted, swatting your attack away with his hands.

“Uh huh, so what did I say?” You lifted a brow, hands on your hips.

He smirked at your newfound attitude, always finding it so adorable and endearing.

“Alright, alright. You caught me.” He admitted, to which you let out an annoyed sounding huff.

“Kook! This is important!” your eyes lit up then, a theoretical lightbulb switching on above your head, “Wait, that’s it! I’ve got the name!”

“Care to share with the rest of the class?” Jungkook teased, and you playfully punched his shoulder.

“Kookie Cutters, but… spelled like your name.” You visibly blushed as you told him your suggestion, and he was sure you were the cutest person he’d ever laid eyes on.

“Sounds good to me.”

Jungkook inhaled one final deep breath before wrapping his hand around the door handle and opening it up, stepping inside of the decently sized building.

He was immediately greeted with the smell of bleach and hairspray, the sound of gossiping hairdressers and clients buzzing through his ears.

The place had grown impressively since the last time he’d been. You’d obviously hired more help, as well as made several renovations to the store’s overall aesthetic. The walls that used to be the ugliest shade of puke green were now a stylish cool toned grey, and the once tile floors had been replaced with dark rustic hardwood. You’d replaced the cheap light fixtures with spectacular chandeliers, and the waiting area that used to have a sofa and a small tv now housed several chairs and two wall mounted flat screens.

It suited the place, he thought. It suited you.

“You look lost.” A feminine voice pulled him out of his trance, and he turned to face none other than Lee Mina.

He offered her a small shrug, his eyes still looking the place over and attempting to catch sight of anything he might’ve missed.

“Just impressed, is all. Looks a lot different than it did two years ago. Well, I mean, other than the name.”

“You’re a cocky son of a bitch, you know that?” The brunette crossed her arms over her chest and tapped her toes on the floor below, exuding annoyance from every single one of her pores.

“I’ve been told that a time or two, yeah.” He confessed, looking past her and scanning the other women in the salon— looking for you.

“She’s in her office,” Mina informed, “but I highly doubt she wants to see you.”

“I told her I was on my way here.”

“Awfully bold of you to come into a place filled to the brim with scissors and bleach, don’t you think?” Mina held a bite to her voice that damn near sent shivers down the man’s spine.

Luckily, you finally made an appearance and stood beside your hard headed friend.

“Down, girl,” you placed a hand on her shoulder, nodding toward the waiting area, “you’ve got a client, no time for poisoning my ex boyfriend.”

“Trust me,” she started, shooting a death glare in Jungkook’s direction as she began to walk away, “I can make time.”

Jungkook was sure that if looks could kill, he’d be six feet under right now.

“She doesn’t like me, does she?”

You scoffed, hands on your hips.

“Can you blame her?”

No, he couldn’t.

He sighed, rubbing nervously at the back of his neck, “Can we go somewhere and talk?”

You nodded, “Yeah, we can go into my office. Follow me.”

He did as he was told, keeping a safe distance between the two of you as he walked behind you.

“I like what you’ve done with the place, by the way.”

You mumbled a thank you as you opened up your wooden office door, stepping aside and gesturing him to go in before you.

Your office was just as impressive as the main space, but Jungkook could tell that you’d taken the time to make this room more personal. Pictures of you and your friends hung on the wall behind where your glass desk was sat, and he’d be lying if he said it didn’t upset him to see that there weren’t any pictures of you two. Not that he’d expected there to be.

Apparently, you could see the way that his face seemed to fall at that realization, and you were quickly bumping his hip to turn his attention to the picture frame beside your laptop.

It was a photo of you and Jungkook, around seventeen years old, he guessed. His hair was much shorter, and his skin had a lot less ink— as in, had no ink. Yours was the same way, bare and tattooless. Jungkook was kissing your cheek in the photo, and you were grinning from ear to ear with your metal braces on full display.

He couldn’t help but to reach out and touch it, allowing his fingers to ghost over the picture as he reminisced about the past. You’d become his everything when the two of you were just sixteen, the typical high school sweethearts cliché.

He shared his first kiss with you, and you shared yours with him. It was so bad— teeth clacking and tongues unsure of what to do. But eventually, the two of you figured it out. Together.

Your first time having sex was even worse, because neither of you even managed to cum. Maybe you would’ve, if Jungkook’s mom hadn’t walked in in the middle of it and proceeded to give you the world’s longest speech about how she was too young for grandchildren.

“Did you really think I’d have pictures of everyone else, but leave you out?” You asked, taking a step forward and leaning your back against the desk beside him.

“Guess it shouldn’t shock me,” he shrugged, straightening his posture as he sat on the edge of the desk and allowed one leg to dangle down, “seeing as how I still have a picture of you on my station at the shop.”

“You know,” he laughed, shaking his head, “I was so mad before I came here. Really, my blood was boiling. But as soon as I laid eyes on you—“

“Don’t,” you cut him off with a wave of your hand, “just say what you came here to say, Jungkook.

You weren’t looking at him, your eyes were staring straight forward at the frames hanging on the wall in front of you. He could see the way they were glossed over, tears threatening to spill out at any moment.

He’d made you cry so many times before, and every single time he did he felt like he was dying— like all of the air was being slowly sucked from his lungs.

“Bug, don’t cry,” he stood in front of you instantly, his hands instinctively finding their way onto the sides of your face, “I just wanted to apologize, to tell you that I’m sorry for hurting you.”

You closed your eyes, and to his surprise, leaned into his touch. He swiped his thumb across your cheekbone as a single tear fell down, tucking a loose strand of hair behind your ear.

“You keep saying that,” you choked out, fully allowing the sobs to take over your body now, “but you don’t ever make any effort to stop doing it!”

Your body began to shake, and you could no longer hold yourself up. The weight of everything that had happened recently, and in the past, was clearly getting to you. You fell against Jungkook’s chest as you continued to choke out pitiful sobs, and he used his strong arms to hold your body up to keep you from slipping to the ground.

“I c-can’t do this anymore, Kook! I’m so in love with you that I feel it in every inch of my body, but all you seem to want to do is h-hurt me,” you continued to ramble, using the back of your hand to wipe at your nose, “and I know you don’t mean to sometimes. But sometimes y-you do! And I just— I miss you, I miss who you used to be. I miss the guy that loved me and treated me right when we were teenagers! I know he’s in there somewhere, so either dig deep and f-find him or stay the f-fuck out of my life because I—“

The sound of Jungkook’s own sobbing cut you off. He’d begun stroking your hair with his hand as he let you get everything out, but it wrecked him to know he was making you feel this way.

“I’ll try and be better, I swear to God I will. You’re all I’ve ever fucking wanted, and I am so sorry for all the hurt and pain I’ve caused you. You deserve so much better than me,” he lifted your chin with his fingers so that his sad eyes could meet your own, “but if you’ll give me one more chance… I swear I’ll be the man that you need me to be.”

He could tell that the gears of your mind were working in overdrive, weighing out the pros and cons of putting your trust in him again. He hoped with every fiber of his being that you would, because come hell or high water, he was going to prove to you that he was worth your love again.

You lifted your hands up to meet his face, wiping his tears from his cheeks and tucking his long strands of hair behind his ears.

“Okay. One more chance.”

The sigh of relief that Jungkook breathed out could no doubt be heard from the other side of the world. He nodded once, taking in the fact that you’d actually agreed to have him in your life full time again, even on a trial basis.

His forehead leaned against your own as he pulled you tighter against him, giving your body with the tightest embrace— scared that at any moment, you’d change your mind and run in the opposite direction.

“I promise you won’t regret this, bug. I mean it, I—“

Jungkook was cut off by Mina swinging open the door to your office and announcing your presence with her seemingly always excited, high pitched voice.

“Oh, my God! I’m sorry, I-I didn’t mean to interrupt, it’s just— uhm,” she was stammering awkwardly, and speaking way too quickly, “Yn, you uhm… have a client. She’s waiting for you.”

You gave her a quick nod, letting her know that you’d be out in just a minute as you wiped at the mascara running under your eyes.

“Call me later?” you asked, finally breaking away from your ex lover’s hold, “We have a lot more to talk about.”

“Sure thing.”

As you turned to exit the room, you stood up on the tips of your toes and placed a hand on Jungkook’s shoulder before allowing your lips to peck a kiss to his cheek.

“Get home safe, Kook.”

⇠ masterlist ⇢

a/n: if you’d like to be added to the tag list, send me an ask! thanks for reading!

tag list: @ppersonna @taetaewonderland @preciouschimine @agaassi @honeyoongles @jinhitwhore @alterlovess @dontaskshhhhh @bonobonoya2001 @fan-ati–c @diorhobii @athenakyle @nerdycookiemonster-1222 @ashleyjoyx @sadgalsadpal @shaktibhardwaj @jeonsbananamilk @bat-shark-repellant @jkhey97 @sterynlis @aizuwusho @krystle1990 @crazylittlemay @betysotelo18 @cypheruby @deadleaves278 @awesomekpoptrashblogposts @styxdagger @kookoo-kachoo @jungkooksseuphoria @imluckybitches @ayasanuwu @sugaminh @kisskoos @tae165 @themyscirarey @janetgordyx3 @mini-coop25 @out-of-jams @sugalarity @yoongissugarmommy @missseoulite @amoreguk @meesheru @namugguk @guksweet @55west81st @barbikatherine @ilyeuphoria @jeon-joker

if you aren’t tagged, it’s because tumblr won’t let me tag certain people for some reason. so sorry! :(

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butgilinsky · 4 years

Text

tension // rc

warning; language, underaged drinking, mentions of cheating, mentions of anti depressants but not rly depression, mentions of smut but nothing descriptive, hella angst

summary; you find out the real reason kiara doesn’t hang out with you and the kooks anymore.

word count; 4.5k+

rafe x reader, platonic!kie x reader, and a sprinkle of rafe x kie

you had been friends with kiara for years. back in middle school, when kiara sat at a table by herself, you shocked your friends by placing your tray directly across from hers and asking her why she chose to sit by herself.

you knew people that liked kiara, so you knew she wasn’t forced to outcast herself, but you quickly learned that she didn’t like the people at your school. she’d rather save turtles that caught in a plastic bag rather than talk about which swimsuit fit her body the best.

she wasn’t like your other friends, and you liked that about her. you liked that she didn’t stray from her genuine personality to fit in, like most people on figure eight did. she was authentic and real, and she wasn’t going to jeopardize that for a surface level friendship.

kiara used to blame her kook year on you. if you hadn’t befriended her in middle school than she wouldn’t have felt so lost when you moved onto high school and she was stuck to finish seventh and eighth grade. the age difference - only two years - never made a difference before, but after spending an entire year with you, her last two years in middle school were hard to swallow.

the pogues didn’t go to the same school, and with you in high school, she had no choice but to turn to sarah. sarah had been a mutual friend between the two of you, and provided a sense of comfort and familiarity that kiara couldn’t find anywhere else.

kiara was excited when she began high school. she could start hanging out with you again, coordinating her elective classes to spend more time around you. it was everything she had been looking forward to for the entirety of eighth grade.

she looked up to you. a girl two years older than her that didn’t care when her friends ragged on her for spending so much time with a freshman. you took her under your wing and made sure nobody gave her shit in high school, and she’d never forget that. even when she spent the entire next year swearing off any and all kooks.

you never understand the switch she had flipped, thinking she had gotten comfortable with her makeshift life on figure eight. you thought you proved to her that kooks weren’t all that bad. you showed her that for every time topper made a crude remark, kelce was there to interject with a light hearted response. you tried to make her comfortable there, treating her like the younger sister you never had.

then she flipped on you. when her and sarah had a falling out, you were caught in the middle of it. you’d been dating rafe at the time, which made you biased in a way you wished you didn’t have to be. you couldn’t throw sarah in your rear view mirror like she didn’t mean anything. she was in the heart of your friend group, and despite what you wanted, you were around her too much to cut her out entirely.

losing kiara hurt. you’d opened up to her about things that nobody else knew about you. you’d slept at her house when things with your parents got rocky. she was there when your brother moved for college, and offered a sense of comfort you couldn’t find in your other friends.

she didn’t ask you to choose, she simply left without another word. she told you that she’d see you in school but that had to be the extent of it. if she was swearing off all kooks, that had to include you, no matter how much it hurt her to walk away from you.

your last summer on the island was supposed to be the best one yet. sure, you’d be back for small breaks during the semester, and an entire month between fall and spring, but you were going all the way to south carolina in august. you were determined to have a good time.

leaving rafe would be hard, seeing as he had just gotten back from his first, and last, year at college, but you were prepared to face the battles, no matter how tough.

something about this summer felt off from the beginning. you didn’t know what it was, but you tried to shrug it off anytime it came up. you did your part in trying to keep your boyfriend and his goons out of trouble, though that proved easier said than done.

it didn’t help when sarah dropped off the radar, beginning to sneak around and disappear for long periods of time. she had blown it off every time you asked, despite you promising her that she could trust you with every fiber of her being. you had been her honorary older sister for years, and you dating her older brother only heightened that.

when she blew off your plans to go to the movie night, you made a mental note to dig into what exactly deemed more important than sneaking drinks during the movie neither of you cared about.

“hey, kie.” your head turned to follow your boyfriend, eyebrows pulled together when he stepped up to the concessions stand to stand beside the girl you hadn’t spoken to in - you don’t even remember how long.

you picked up on kiara’s annoyed expression quickly, sensing a small amount of discomfort in the way that she quickly ignored rafe. he didn’t seem to notice, or maybe he just didn’t care, but it captured your interest fairly quickly.

topper tried to grab your attention, mentioning something about the bottle of burnett’s he scored from his plug earlier that day. you waved him off quickly, eyes firmly locked on the two that stood just a few yards away from you.

“how are you?” kiara spared you a short glance before practically rolling her eyes, trying to mentally map out an escape plan, no doubt.

“i’m fine.” rafe nodded, swinging his weight from the balls of his feet back onto his heels.

“good, good. um, tell your boy that we know what he did.” kiara’s expression stood steady, despite the confusion clear in her eyes that you were sure rafe didn’t pick up on.

“sorry, what boy are you talking about?” her eyes found yours again, but she could tell you were just as lost as she was, so she looked back at rafe quickly.

“uh, he’ll know.” kiara rolled her eyes one final time, though the eye contact between the two last just long enough for your fists to clench at your sides before she turned and walked away.

“bye.” you watched rafe watch kiara walk away from him, his hands shoved in his pockets and back turned towards you.

there was something in the way that he watched her leave. the way his gaze lingered on her longer than normal. the way he chewed on the inside of his cheek when he spun around to face you. how his eyes were locked on his feet for a short second before he was offering you a bright smile as he returned to the same smiling rafe before he’d seen kiara.

“what the fuck was that?” you didn’t notice topper pinching the bridge of his nose behind you, shaking his head at rafe’s lack of subtlety. you didn’t see the way that kelce was shaking his hand back and forth, telling rafe to completely deny whatever the hell just happened between him and kiara.

sure, to anybody else watching it was just rafe and kiara talking. two people that supposedly didn’t like each other, despite their shared title of a kook. two people talking about something very vague and somehow secretive.

but to you, it was your boyfriend talking to a girl he often didn’t associate with. it was rafe talking to your ex best friend who had left you high and dry after a fall out with your other friend, which you had no hand in. it was the girl who had deemed you guilty by association after sarah had turned her back on the girl.

it was obvious there was tension between the two of them, but you had no idea why.

“what was what?” rafe wrapped an arm around your neck, trying to pull you into his chest but you planted your hand flat on his chest to stop the collision.

“that whole interaction, the tension, what the fuck was that about?” rafe rolled his eyes and moved to press a quick kiss to your forehead, something he knew calmed you down without fail.

“the only tension between kie and i is the same tension between her and the rest of figure eight. she hates me, ‘cause i’m a kook and i mess with her dirty pogue friends.” you wanted to push it further, wanted to say something else, but you couldn’t stop yourself from melting into the boy’s embrace when he pressed another, longer kiss to your forehead.

“stop stressing, baby. let’s go sit down.” you nodded, accepting the kiss rafe moved to place on your lips.

the next time you noticed something being off was midsummers. your mind had already been racing when you’d stood beside topper, eyes locked on sarah and john b less than a mile away. you were confused as to why she wasn’t being discrete about it, kissing him during one of the biggest events of the summer.

your hand found topper’s arm, squeezing it gently before leaning into his side to provide a sense of comfort that he surely needed. you were confused, hurt for topper, and you knew it would inevitably become your job to get to the bottom of it all.

you were upset that rafe wasn’t ravishing you in your dress, like you had originally planned. he had made a few comments in your ear as the night progressed, especially after the slit in your dress rode up while you crouched behind kelce to hide from your parents while you downed a glass of wine.

his eyes had been glued to you almost all night long, and while you were drinking it all in and enjoying every minute of it, he’d disappeared at some point and you were now left to comfort a confused and hurt topper.

when the commotion between jj and the head of security erupted in the middle of the crowd, your eyes found rafe. you knew he had something to do with it. you would’ve blown it off as a casual kook v. pogue rivalry interaction, but the way his eyes were trained on kiara when she began sticking up for jj made your blood boil.

“you okay?” topper nudged you with his elbow, but you shook your head gently, eyes burning into your boyfriend’s back as he watched kiara run off, despite her parents’ protests.

“do you know something i don’t, top?” his eyebrows pulled together in confusion, not catching on to what you were asking him. “what’s going on between rafe and kiara?”

you knew you’d hit something when topper’s face fell. his lips parted as he tried to come up with something. a diversion, a distraction, an excuse, anything. you could tell he was digging through his brain for something to say to you.

“topper, what the hell is going on?” he started stuttering, falling over his words as he shook his head slowly.

“n-nothing. why would you- what makes you think that anything’s going on with them? kiara and rafe? pfft, that’s ridiculous, y/n.” your jaw clenched and you put a hand flat on his chest, pushing him back and away from the people stood around the two of you.

“topper. spill. now.” your voice dropped to an octave you never used with topper. he’d seen you use it with rafe on multiple occasions, and the one time that kelce lied to you about the wine stain on your carpet. he knew it was a tone that you only used for specific situations, and he knew it meant he had no way out of this.

“i-”

“what’s up with you two?” your head turned towards kelce, the bright smile he held once left his face at the sight of your tensed muscles and hand still pressed against topper’s chest.

“what’s going on with rafe and kiara?” kelce looked panic, eyes looking over at topper who was shaking his head quickly to say he hadn’t told you anything he was supposed to. “kelce.”

“okay, okay-”

“kelce, no!”

“top, we can’t hide it from her forever.”

“we can if you shut up!”

“she’s clearly catching on-”

“only because you’re giving her ammo!”

“shouldn’t we tell her the truth if she thinks it’s still happening-”

“still happening? how many times has it happened?” topper let out a heavy sigh, mentally cursing kelce for saying too much. kelce always had a soft spot for you, and that proved to be a weakness in more situations than not. “someone tell me what the fuck is going on, right now, or so help me god-”

“rafe and kiara slept together, okay? they slept together when you two were going through one of your spats.” your hand fell from topper’s chest, an uneasy feeling flowing through you as you tried to process the given information.

“it happened once when you drilled into him too far and he kind of flew off the rails a bit. he swore it was a one time thing but then they fell into a bit of a routine. it only happened a few times, but-”

“when?” your eyes flicked between the two boys, who were sharing eye contact to decide who was the one who ha to break it to you. “i don’t care who says it, someone just fucking say it!”

“right before rafe graduated.” kelce rushed out, almost out of breath from how fast the words fell off of his tongue.

you were still friends with kiara then. you’d been dating rafe for over a year at that point, and you were finding out about all of this over a year after it all happened.

“how long?” topper sighed heavily, hating the position he was currently in. he was friends with both of you, but rafe was his boy. he’d been sworn to secrecy for over a year now and it would’ve been fine if you weren’t so observant, and kelce wasn’t so guilt ridden.

“a few months, i don’t know. like three, maybe four.”

you wished the ground would swallow you whole then. you knew it wouldn’t have come to light if you didn’t dig so far, but the damage had been done. you knew now, and there was no way around that.

everybody had been lying to you. your boyfriend, who you loved more than anything. your ex best friend, who you still cared for immensely. the two boys who had stood up for you for years. the two boys who you cared for like they had been siblings born into the wrong family.

your eyes stung, maybe from the tears that didn’t often come to you, maybe from the pressure of holding them back. you weren’t entirely sure which caused the burn in them, but it was uncomfortably present. your head started nodding, and your hands found the fabric of your dress, lifting it enough for you to bend your knees and slip off your shoes.

“what are you doing?” kelce started moving before you could walk away, worried he had just ruined seemingly everything with a simple conversation. a conversation he should’ve steered clear of.

“i’m going home, kelce.” you turned around, almost running right into the last person you wanted to see.

“you’re going home?” he spoke gently, eyes locked on your shoes in your hand before looking back up and cupping your face in his hands. “hey, what’s wrong?”

you grabbed his wrist gently, pulling his hand away from your face and setting it back at his side. he was confused, watching you summon every ounce of self control you possessed in order to stay calm in this moment.

“i’m going home.” you said one more time, walking around rafe and towards your car, but you felt a hand on your elbow seconds later, only a few feet away from your previous spot.

“baby what’s going on? at least let me drive you home-”

“why don’t you drive kiara home, rafe?” rafe rolled his eyes, letting out a low groan at the name that slipped from your lips.

“we’re back on this kie bullshit? there’s nothing going on between kiara and i-”

“there was though, wasn’t there?” rafe paused, his movements stuttering as he stared at you with an unreadable expression. “c’mon, rafe. tell me nothing happened. tell me that you didn’t cheat on me with my best friend.”

“who told you? was it kelce? son of a bitch. i knew his soft spot for you was going to bite me in the ass-”

“the only thing that bit you in the ass was your inability to keep your dick in your pants, rafe.” you ripped your arm out of his grasp then, eyes wide and filled to the brim with tears that you refused to let surpass your waterline.

“baby, just listen to me-”

“no, you listen, rafe. i have never loved a person in my life the way that i love you. i have never done anything to hurt you and i would never think of doing something like what you did.

“i have never spent my time thinking about a person the way that i think about you. i never asked you for anything, never asked you to promise me a single thing. i never forced anything onto you, and you couldn’t do me the decency of just staying loyal to me. i would never disrespect you like that.”

he knew you were right. he’d been at the boneyard when tourons approached you at a kegger. he’d seen you turn every single one down before they wasted their breath on asking. he’d seen you duck and dodge every person’s efforts in any situation, just before you came back to him with an amused smile and another story to tell.

you kept him out of trouble that way. you were honest and transparent. you could’ve easily turned them down and pocketed the experience, but you told rafe every time. you didn’t know he saw almost every time, but you did it because you were loyal. you didn’t see anybody else the way you saw rafe. you’d do anything to assure him that he was the only one you had eyes for.

and the icing on the cake was that kiara was involved. meaning that your entire junior year that was spent juggling time between your best friend and your boyfriend, they were spending their free time with each other, behind your back. you would’ve done anything for either of them. you still would.

“y/n, i love you-”

“i wish i believed that, rafe. i really wish i did.” you shook your head gently, looking back at the other two that were watching with guilt building within them. “i’ve been loyal to the three of you to a fault. i’ve never kept anything from either of you, and-”

you shook your head, looking up at the sky to fight the oncoming rush of tears that continued to build. you refused to wipe them before the fell, but you also refused to let them fall. topper and kelce had never seen you cry, and rafe had only see it a few times.

“i expected better, which may be my fault. i just- for fucks sake. topper i just watched your girlfriend cheat on you and comforted you for the last hour! how in the hell is that not enough motivation to say something to me about this?” you were screaming now, but there wasn’t anybody around to hear any of you.

“y/n, i’m sorry-”

“just, forget it. i just want to go home-”

“baby-”

“we’re done, rafe.” his shoulders dropped, along with his jaw as he stared at you in disbelief. “it’s done. whatever this was to you,” you moved your hand between the two of you, gesturing to you as a couple. “whatever the last two years was is over, rafe. we’re over.”

your voice broke, pitching up in the middle of your words. rafe felt his airways constrict as a lump formed in his throat. he felt tears burn his eyes, much like yours had been for a few minutes at this point. he saw you slip through his fingers as you started taking steps back from him, not daring to show any sign of weakness as you squared your shoulders.

“don’t fucking follow me, any of you.” you threatened lowly, spinning on your feet and walking off before any of them had time to process everything that had just happened.

you tried to find your car, heavily disappointed and frustrated when you remembered you’d come with kelce. you were supposed to come on your own, given that rafe was being dragged along with his family.

the frustration was enough to let the first tear slip out of the corner of your eye, falling down your cheek at an excruciating pace. once the first slipped, it was as if the floodgates had been knocked down.

they came faster than you could wipe them away, which led you to leaving your cheeks a stained and wet mess on your walk home.

you tried to think of all the times you’d blindly trusted the pair, never questioning their actions or motives a single time in the past. you never questioned people you trusted. it had been one of your faulty traits, being loyal to a fault. you blindly trusted people, but it had never come back to bite you this intensely.

you rolled your eyes when you saw the pogue’s van on the same road you had been walking down for longer than you could remember. you were sure it’d pass until it didn’t, slowing to an excruciating pace on the road beside you.

“y/n!” you sighed heavily, fully intending on ignoring the group of kids piled into the van beside you until kie stuck her head out of the passenger side window.

“y/n, why are you out here all aone?” you turned then, facing the van that then came to a stop, kiara’s eyes locked on your tear stained cheeks. “holy shit, y/n, what happened?”

kiara had only seen you cry once. it was the summer before you were going into high school, and you’d fallen off of your surf board. you were frustrated, having fallen more than succeeding that afternoon. the pent up frustration tipped you over the edge you’d been teetering on for months.

you told kiara about the problems you’d been faced with, anxious about starting high school and seemingly losing all the friends you’d had your entire life. you didn’t know what to expect, and you were scared, but you never told anybody that.

nobody expect kiara.

“you were my best friend, you know?” you spoke gently, watching as kiara’s face twisted in confusion. “you were my best fucking friend and i trusted you with things i’d never tell anybody else. i told you about my parents almost getting a divorce, and how i almost had to move in with my brother all the way in maine.

“i told you about almost being put on anti depressants, and confessed every secret i ever had to you. i told you everything. i trusted you with everything. never in a million years did i ever think you would’ve gone behind my back and fuck my boyfriend.”

kiara’s face dropped, her eyes widened while a chorus of gasps erupted from inside of the van. she moved to step out of the van, pushing the door open after struggling to unlock it and stepping in front of you on the dark and empty road.

“y/n, you have to listen to me-”

“no, i don’t. that’s why you stopped hanging around, isn’t it? that’s why you ran to the cut, because you went behind my back and slept with my boyfriend for months-”

“y/n, it wasn’t like that, i swear.”

“then what was it, kiara?” you screamed, your shoulders falling further than they already had while you stared at her with defeat evident in your features.

“i fell in love with him.” you scoffed, rolling your eyes while a sarcastic laugh dripped from your lips.

“that’s amazing, kiara. i’m so happy for you. i’m so happy you found love in the one person on the entire island that held my heart in the palm of his hand.” she sighed heavily, anger bubbling inside of her.

“it’s not my fault i fell in love with him, y/n!”

“did you love him the first time you fucked him? is that why you slept with him, or was it only after you’d snuck around behind my back for months that you started to fall for him?” you raised your eyebrows, your patience for this conversation wearing thin.

when she didn’t respond, you nodded. you smiled softly, despite the fresh tears rolling down your cheeks as you stepped away from the van and kiara.

“y/n, wait-”

“get back in the van and never fucking speak to me, ever again, kiara. i don’t want anything to do with you for the rest of my life.”

kiara felt her heart shatter in her chest. watching you walk away with every ounce of the truth hurt more than the day she’d walked away, shielding you from this heartbreak.

she knew it was wrong the first time she slept with rafe. she’d been vulnerable, and seeing rafe vulnerable somehow helped. she didn’t love rafe then, but it didn’t take long for her to fall into it with him. their time together had been brief, but it was something kiara would never forget.

falling in love with her best friend’s boyfriend was never something she intended on doing. she told rafe it was wrong and that they could never be together again after the first night, but she had trouble following her own rules. she’d been heartbroken when rafe broke things off for good. he didn’t want to hurt you anymore than he already had, and kiara had to respect that.

that had been the leading factor in kiara’s hatred for the kooks. she knew kelce and topper knew. she knew rafe would never tell you, and you’d get to live the perfect life by his side. she hated rafe for stealing her heart and crushing it in front of her eyes. she hated you for living the life she wanted more than she’d care to admit.

she hated herself for hurting you, even if you didn’t know. she’d covered it up with the story of sarah’s party that night. though that wasn’t a lie, it was dull compared to her betrayal towards you. sarah was never her best friend, you were. you just, unfortunately, loved the same boy.

you both were in love with rafe cameron, and he chose you.

but none of that mattered to you as you walked home, tears in your eyes and on your cheeks. you had lost everything in one night, and you didn’t know how to process it.

one thing you knew for sure is that you couldn’t wait to move off of this island.

#rafe cameron #rafe x reader #rafe #obx #the obx #the outer banks #outer banks #outer banks netflix #drew starkey #kiara carrera #kie carrera

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tordenvejr · 2 years

Note

Hi Vic,

This is a heavy question so only answer if you feel called to, and I hope I’ll do it justice.

(Emotionally abusive ex, sexual coercion).

Due to necessity and seeming compassion, I moved into a shared house with close friends, one of which was an emotionally abusive ex. I was in the healing process when I made that decision and couldn’t think or see things clearly, and half-believed the reality he was feeding me at the time. We agreed to be close friends and I felt it was the responsible, mature thing to do - and most importantly, the most loving.

The abuse continued here and there. Manipulation and gaslighting. Sexual coercion. The coercion eventually allowed me to sleep with him a few times post-breakup while living together. This was a very confusing time. I tried my best to express how it made me uncomfortable, many many times. The more serious I was (which wasn’t very often out of fear I suppose) the more panic he through back at me (always lots of shouting). Sometimes suicide threats. I went to him to express my pain, which he turned into his pain and threw back at me.

I’ve now realised + shut off from a dead end situation. I’m practicing ignoring, and shutting out, and focusing on me. However, the coercion happened again recently (always light hearted, still dangerous). I had to say no multiple times, and was proud of my firmness (which I felt remorse for not grasping before) . He apologised - but only because he’s with someone else now. She’s a lovely lady. It seems they’re together but he hasn’t told me - I think back to the times I thought he was cheating on me (he called me crazy and evil for accusing him, despite the evidence) and wonder, if I can do anything now. I want to tell this girl. I’m worried it’ll do more harm than good.

He’s shown her private conversations between us though and has told me she thinks I’m emotionally manipulative but that she��s honest with him too (I’m not, I don’t know if I believe him, I just know that it’s added salt in the wound and a way to get back at me - he knows he’s emotionally manipulative).

It’s made me realise how cruel men can sometimes be, and how they can sometimes crush innocence. How much sacrifice women go through, how vulnerable and strong we can be. He (I hope you don’t mind me saying) utterly and continually took the piss.

He was very controlling in the past. I was very entangled. It’s this weird half-get out where we’re still friends, and I still have love for him, this lovely boystrous boy, but there’s so much pain inside him that he’s inflicting on others.

I feel like I have all this weight on my shoulders. Maybe I was naive to be friends. I tried so hard to be loving, I fought my corner, I have been angry, I have been upset, I’ve cried, I’ve talked to friends. I’ve felt listened to, not listened to, hardly understood. There was just so much pain that no one sees, it was so insidious to me. I’m lucky I half-realised so soon on, but unlucky to have dragged the other half on for so long. Imposter syndrome kicked in.

So I’m left in this weird situation where it feels like I have to just ignore it and get on with my life, but there’s this thing looming over me. Do we tell his new partner? Do I leave completely and run for cover? How to heal when he’s digging into the wound? He’s framing me out to be evil, manipulative, and not over him to his new gal, admitting that he hurt me but only half-admitting, half dragging me down. It’s not true. I don’t want to talk to his illusion or panic. How to escape?

My friend advised me to write all the bad things down. There were just so many. I have a mental block on most. I can’t believe I didn’t believe myself. I still feel the guilt and punish myself for not being better. He tells me I think I’m perfect and that I’m not. He tells me that no one else brings out this reaction in him, and that it’s only me. The gaslighting has changed me as a person slightly too, I notice myself trying to explain in absolute fact and feeling like I’m mis-remembering everything. He continues to be sometimes friendly, sometimes rude, making comments and remarks, disregarding physical boundaries! Irritating me like a friend, knowing it angers me, making me feel like I’m overly sensitive to get annoyed.

I lost my temper recently and shouted at him that he’s lucky I have such a strong head and heart.

I’m wondering if you have any insights. Please know that this message comes with deep love, and that I feel a lot more able now to protect others from similar behaviour, a fire has been lit inside me that only seeks to heal + move forwards. I’m worried though that he still has my left arm in a twist. My housemates (his close friends too) offered to kick him out but I felt it was the wrong thing to do. It would backfire: it would be too much guilt: I should not control: I want to let it lie: I don’t want to cause any harm. He’d always hold it against me and paint me out to be a terrible person, and that scares me. I don’t know if I could deal with seeing him in pain.

I also just don’t know how to deal with the image people have of me, how it seems so wrong, so little justice, I’m trying to be as kind as possible but people see the bitchy ex girlfriend

- with love, always. Have the loveliest evening. I believe the right thing happens when we’re on the side of love

Thank you for listening ♥️

love loses its power and its true nature when it's used and given in a way that inflicts violence or pain on ourselves. to be loving doesn't mean to be unconditionally forgiving, of bad behavior or to give space to people, who repeatedly and purposely exhibit hurtful behavior, because you see the good that is packed in there deep, deep somewhere. if the good isn't given freely to you with open hands, if there are no genuine apologies and remorse, but only attack on attack, then that good is not relevant. it is being suppressed, it is not alive.

don't give love and space in your life to people whose goodness lies dormant and dead. while their hearts may deserve it when you sweep away all the wounds that causes them to inflict more wounds on other, you cannot sweep those things away for another person. that is their work. and they will eat your kindness raw and digest it into leverage and means of manipulation.

is it loving to you? is it compassionate to you?

you do not need to be on good terms with someone who abused you, and while your intentions may not be as such, it is an act of violence against yourself. you do not deserve any violence. and certainly not in the name of sparing someone who hurts you. i say this with love, but i say it firmly because i never want you to be around this man or anyone like him again.

i'm deeply sorry he took advantage of your well meaning, and i'm sorry he fed you lies and called them truths. it is not your fault for not seeing through them, that's how manipulation works, it is not a fault to anticipate love and kindness in another because that's how a relationship exchange should be. it is his fault that he didn't show the love and kindness that he was supposed to. you never deserved lies or the abuse.

you can show a manipulator the wounds they inflicted on you, and somehow they'll spin it into the wounds that you have inflicted on them. they will grasp at anything because they have such a distorted relationship with reality. this can break you down and make you even more uncertain of your own narrative and of your own worth. that's why it's so important to work with and process these things on a mental and bodily level because your body needs to know that it is safe now.

your boundaries should never, ever be met with aggression, violence or denial.

i'm proud of you for being firm in your boundaries, and i'm sorry you experienced remorse at not being able to before. we often aren't able to express boundaries when we feel unsafe doing so or as if it won't be respected. in this context that is a part of the coercion and abuse.

i'm not clear on if your still live together, but if you do i would strongly advice that you get out of there truly as soon as possible. it's important to not only ignore him, but to cut him out entirely. so on the topic of warning his girl, you can do that if you want and you will be safe doing it, otherwise pass on the responsibility and ask someone to do it for you. after that let it go, you are your responsibility.

i'm sorry that he's turned the emotional manipulation back on you. he's probably giving a very different recount of what has happened, prompting her to think that.

you can have love for someone and not allow them space in your life. the minute manipulation (and deliberate at that) comes into the picture they lose the right to be around you, not to mention the second coercion occurs. he does not sound one bit lovely to me, sometimes when we contain wonderful things we can project them onto others - but the reason you see him as lovely is because you are seeing him through your eyes.

trauma is a heavy thing to carry, but it becomes lighter the more we process it and let go of the things that aren't in our highest good (him.) it's a good thing to be trusting of others, to be loving and forgiving, but use it for the right people. if someone repeatedly mistreats you they are not the right person.

leave completely and cut ties with him. be attentive with yourself. you went through something very traumatic for a long period of time. your body and heart needs your kindness and healing. if the aggressor is present your nervous system won't open up enough to heal.

he may paint you out to be a crazy ex girlfriend, but as he paints out every woman he's been with in this way eventually it will come to light that the common denominator is him.

ask loved ones if you can stay there until you get a new place, block him off of everything, tell people you trust to help keep you safe, get legal grounding if necessary.

writing can be a good outlet, but it's important to also get a bodily trauma release. focus on the trauma of the treatment you went through, the effects on your self esteem, expression and for the guilt and self punishment. you didn't do anything wrong. eft is a good tool for this that you can use anywhere.

rather than saying he's lucky that you have a strong head and heart, allow yourself to be lucky. because you will use both to value your safety.

he is an abuser, emotionally and physically. you have every right in the world, to kick him out. you are allowed to control who has a right to be around you, and he lost that right a long time ago. he can hold whatever he wants against you because he is irrelevant for the rest of your life. no space for cruelty. and he can paint the situation however he wishes, because it has nothing to do with the reality. it is not your responsibility that he would feel pain as a direct result of the consequences to his own deliberate actions.

be careful that kindness becomes a means of walking over yourself. you don't have to be polite and shrink to small and digestible for others to approve of you or to have them maintain a good image of you. you are kind and you are good, and you will continue to be no matter what any of these people may project on you. if they want to think of you in that way, then they can have at it!

i wish you all the best and more

while i am a therapist, this answer doesn't replace therapy. however i offer counselling here.

#answered

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hinatas-sunshine · 4 years

Text

Synopsis/Request:

Genre: Fluff, tiny angst

A/N for requester: I hope you feel better! I know break ups are the worst - I hope everything works out for the better and you feel at peace by the end of the whole thing. You’re amazing never forget it sunshine! 🌞💛

A/N: I hope you guys enjoy this! I’ve been kinda busy with school and I’ve been writing this throughout the day! Enjoy I love y’all KITHES 🥺❤️

Bokuto:

• When he noticed your sad mood he was automatically sad with you

Akaashi: Bokuto-San? What’s wrong?

• Bokuto staring helplessly at your upset figure sitting in your seat with your knees up to your head down, shoulders shaking as you cry

• Akaashi knew what had happened and he wasn’t about to tell Bokuto without your permission

“Why don’t you go ask her what’s wrong?”

• He walked over to you and draped his body over yours trapping you in a hug, and you moved out of your laid down head to hold him

“We broke up Bokuto.. My boyfriend and I broke up, he broke up with me..”

• He felt his blood boil but just held you closer as you cried silently in his arms

• After school he told Akaashi not to wait up at practice and he walked towards your ex boyfriend, head high and mighty

• Your ex boyfriend almost walked past him but Bokuto pushed him back into a wall

“B-Bokuto...”

“Listen- You don’t have another chance, for starters. When you realize what a cool girl you lost you’re going to be the one crying, and I’ll laugh because you don’t get to ask for her back. It’s sad to see you didn’t appreciate the girl you had because now she’s gone for good - out of your life and she deserves better than this world has to offer. Y/n is my best friend, and anyone who hurts her goes through me.”

• Your ex was a shaking figure next to your best friends towering one

• You turned the corner sniffling before seeing Bokuto’s seething figure over your ex boyfriends trembling one before you placed you hand on Bo’s arm and looked at him

• Your beautiful e/c colored eyes all swollen and nose a deep red from all your crying- his heart dropped to his stomach

“Bo just leave it, it’s not worth it.”

• He nodded slowly before leading you away from him, but not before turning back and glaring at your ex as he scurried away

“You should wait for me to get out of practice! I’ll walk you home and we can have a movie night! I mean it is Friday after all!”

• You sighed

“Bo I wanna be alone right now...”

“But you shouldn’t be, Kuroo always tells me that being alone only makes you more sad. Come on y/n! I’ll even bring your favorite ice cream and candy!”

• You softly at him and nodded, agreeing to his plans

“Fine, we can hang out.”

• Practice was spent with Bokuto teaching you to spike the ball, and pretending it was your ex boyfriends face

Konoha: SCARY! SHES SCARY!

Akaashi: No-

Bokuto: 🤩

• Bokuto kept his promise and you two ate snacks and watch your favorite movie

• switching tubs of ice cream with him and digging into his you spoke up

“Girls ending up with their guy best friends is such a cliché, I’ve never seen it happen in real life.”

“Yeah you’re stinky I would never!”

“And you’re a walking headache!”

• But were you two both SO wrong 😋

Kuroo:

• It was 3 AM when you called your best friend

“You crackhead what are you-“

• When he heard sniffling all his small irritation and tiredness went away and was replaced with instant worry

“Y/n... what’s wrong?”

“H-He broke u-up with me. And I felt alone and had no one else to talk t-to s-so I c-called you.”

• He hated seeing you like this, he hated not being able to reach through the small screen of his phone and hugging you

“Look that jerkwad didn’t deserve you - you were too good for him in the first place and I bet he doesn’t even know how amazing you are.”

• You sniffled slightly but smiled at Kuroo regardless

“Thanks Ku... I knew u could talk to you rooster head... you look a little more roostery?”

“SHUT UP!”

• The next day you seemed normal - but that was to everyone else. Kuroo knew you like the period table baby 😾

• He saw the way you began sighing more and he saw your smile threatening to fall Everytime you spoke - but you weren’t one to cry in front of people.

• He also definitely brought you your favorite coffee since you two were up pretty late last night talking

• When lunch rolled around you sat in front of your phone bouncing your leg nervously and looked around

“How are things with you and (ex boyfriends name).”

“We kinda... broke up...”

• You stood up from your lunch table and walked away fast to your locker

• Kuroo apprached you seeing your head in your locker

“I’m c-coming back I just have t-to get something..”

“Y/n... you’re crying...”

“I-I’m not! The o-onions are just so strong in here!”

• He brought you out of your locker and shut it before taking you in his arms, resting his head on your head as you cried

• Later when you were leaving the school doors you saw Kuroo blocking your ex boyfriends path and you hid around the corner

“You know - she was too good for you. Not everyone can handle a precious heart like hers.”

“Look man can I just g-“

“Who said I was finished?”

• He shut up immediately as Kuroo nodded continuing

“You won’t talk to her, you won’t try to get with her again, you won’t even LOOK in her direction or I swear you really will wish you hadn’t messed with the wrong person.”

“Y-yes sir.”

• Kuroo stepped out of the way before your ex ran past him and Kuroo nodded as he walked down the hall

“Y/n you can come out now.”

“How did you?”

“You always take this way.”

• You nodded and thanked him for what he did

“You don’t need to, I meant what I said and I’ll do it again any other time.”

• You waited for him to leave practice, and then he took you to get some dinner because you hadn’t eaten at all that day

“If you don’t eat I’ll tell Yaku-“

• Not the scary senpai 😔

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