#well. cass does too but- | Explore Tumblr Posts and Blogs

societysonlooker · 1 year

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I'm not trying to be an asshole but I think the funniest thing about fandom discourse is that the same kinda people who will tell you to kys for "liking incest" all because you ship two characters with the same mentor are the SAME PEOPLE that will bend over backwards to defend the most uninspired, bland, and toxic ass ship you've ever seen just because it's canon and het.

#save gotham MY way #you beat the shit out of me to get back at bruce #no. I beat you down so you'd realize robin meant *pain*#and would quit #i- oh...#i have your back. i know no one else in this fucking 'family' does but- but i do #well. cass does too but-#yeah. yeah ive got yours too.#yes this is me being salty but. fucking listen. cassandra cain was not adopted by bruce untol she was something like 19 fucking years old.#she came into that family absolutely READY to really Be part of the family #because outside of bab's mentorship/mothering role she'd never HAD one before.#so she immediately took to dick as her older brkther and tim as her little brother; despite the fact that neither of them jad trusted her #at ALL when she'd first showed up. but you know what the fuck else is Just as likely? This grown ass woman seeing them #as her brothers in arms rather than her Brothers.#and that makes sense. right? a 20 y/o woman going jnto the marines doesnt suddenly view all of her basic training peers the same way as she #sees the two annoying kid brothers she left back home. and instead these guys are now her brothers in arms. the people who are going to #watch her back while she watches theirs.#so if thats easy to comprehend then why is it so hard for people to understand that jason and tim (at least in fucking preboot) Do Not See #Each Other As Brothers. hell! preboot jason is a straight up villain! and one that both hates what tim represents as robin but also #has a high level of respect for tims capability as a hero! preboot jason considered/worked with exactly Two People in his entire 6 years #and they were Scarlet and Tim.#he had trust issues put the fucking door and Didnt Like People and he *still* put her cards out there during bftc to ask tim to work #with him. and sure. bftc fucking sucks. cass should have been batman and just reverted him to urban legend status within the media. however #all of the character interactions (at least the ones where theyre helping each other) are Actually Pretty Well Done. this arc Does actually #help tim and dami reconcile a bit. dick finally steps into the shoes left for him. jason shows that -while off his fucking rocker'his goal #of hasnt changed- DESPITE the fact that hes an entire and highky influencial crime lord!#that emotional journey from to #it just has the potential to be so fucking GOOD and theres nothing wrong with seeing this possibility and runnjng with the ship you think #would come out kf that kinda arc. i mean. hell its Gorgeous.#then meanwhile youve got yja meg brain-nonconning connor while evryone excuses it and antis bend over BACKWARDS to defend it.

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tequiilasunriise · 6 months

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When Steph and Cass get married they don’t take the last name Brown (Daddy Issues™️) or Cain (Daddy Issues Prime™️) or even Wayne (Steph absolutely REFUSES to become a Wayne nosirree), but a secret fourth thing (Gordan).

#BARBRA GORDON IS CASS’ MAMA AND TO AN EXTEND STEPH’S TOO OKAY #yes Steph still has Crystal but yall can NOT tell me she didnt lowkey look up to Babs as a secondary mom figure #the only one who is in on the jig is Kate bc shes officating the whole thing bc DUH and the way she fucken WHEEZZEEDDD when Steph explained #the way Kate would stand at the podium and anounce with such a smug grin #looking DIRECTLY at Bruce #‘I pronounce you…. MRS STEPHANIE AND MRS CASSANDRA GORDAN!’#the sheer fucken UPROARRRR #Steph LAUNCHES herself into Cass’ arms and kisses her senselessly as her now wife effortlessly carries her in a bridal carry #babs takes a second to process before instantly losing her NIND bc oh these crazy kids did NOT no no shes not crying #(she is. she so is. her date Dinah is handing her a hankerchief)#the batbros minus dami are hollering and cheering bc YEAHHHH STICK TO THE MANNNN #dami himself is dismissive and muttering about how could anyone throw away the wayne name like this #(on the inside he actually thinks this is pretty funny and must admit Barbra’s last name is a worthy rival to the Wayne name)#Bruce. Bruce is stunned. shell shocked. this girldad just lost his fav kid his princess #Jim is just having a damn good time bro is clapping Bruce on the back and having a good laugh over it all #also does this mean he has two honorary grandkids? no? well suck it bruce theyre my grandkids now #the other gothmanites who were invited like the birds of pret or the gotham city sirens are also all clowning on Brucie Boy #dc #stephcass #cassandra cain #stephanie brown #batfam

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clarisse-doodles · 2 months

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Cass + ballet 🩰 (ft. supportive siblings and good dad Bruce)

I love the idea of Cass enjoying dance. It's an outlet that allows her to express herself without words, and I think she would enjoy the highly technical aspect of ballet combined with its storytelling and emotional side. and as a former dancer I always have fun imagining my fav characters do ballet :)

#ft good older bro dick grayson. and supportive babs and steph. and good dad bruce #sewing pointe shoes in the batcave as one does #cass jus having fun #dick and cass bonding over how they both enjoy stretching and falling asleep in the strangest positions #the rite of passage of trying pointes for the first time #bruce watches her first performance and she gives him a big hug #listen yall when i saw that comic panel of cass seeing ballet for the first time and the way it just Made Sense to her #i havent been normal since #i also just love the idea that eventually cass decides to take lessons and makes friends and learns things she'd never considered because #i think she'd be able to replicate most of the steps just by watching because of her training but she would be coming from #a background focused on martial arts and fighting and not. art and storytelling #and i'd love to see that being explored more. cass using her athletic skillset in something so unrelated to vigilante life #creating beauty instead of causing violence #clearly i've thought about this too much #if you have fic recs PLEASE GIVE THEM TO ME #i haven't read a lot of comics either outside of the first half of cass' batgirl run so recs for comics abt cass welcome as well!#clarisse doodles #dc #cassandra cain #batfam #batgirl #black bat #dc fanart #ballet

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itsjaywalkers · 5 months

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not sure if i actually ship bartylily but i am very intrigued by them….would definitely read if u ever wrote anything for them 👀👀

how do u think them and jeg would interact?? i feel like the existence of bartylily would throw james & reg off so much lmaooo

CASS I ADORE U AND I’M KISSING U SO HARD FOR THIS it’s such an honour to hear that you’d read them if i ever write anything for them <3 (which i definitely will, they’re in my mind too often)

OOOOOOH I JUST GIGGLED OUT LOUD i think their reactions would be . very fun and wildly different. like reg would be surprised at first and i don’t think he’d get it. like barty, he has this specific view of lily in his mind and he doesn’t understand how barty could’ve fallen for her in the first place and viceversa. they don’t make sense to him but he isn’t . mean or judgemental about it, i feel like none of barty’s friends would be (they’d tease him and take the piss out of him all the time tho, bc that man is Down Bad). after he actually Sees them together a couple of times he starts to get it. they shouldn’t make any sense but they do and they work surprisingly well together so . he stops questioning it at some point and is just supportive

james however. is Appalled. Baffled. Disgusted even. this might just be one of the worst things that’s ever happened to him. it’s not even about jealousy, he’s with reg (sorry it’s the jeggy obsession) and only sees lily as a friend but barty is his Least Favourite Person in existence. he already has to spend too much time around him bc he’s reg’s best friend and now??? now he’s with lily??? bc not only they get along but they’re also dating??? yeah no Fuck That

don’t get me wrong i feel like almost all of lily’s friends wouldn’t take kindly to the news at first (obviously this depends on how u portray both friend groups and their opinions of each other but to me . they never truly get along u know) but i think that they’d grow to accept it at some point. even if begrudgingly. marlene and mary at least. the jury is still out about sirius + remus + peter

but james??? oh he Hates it. and Hates it forever. he’s happy to see lily happy, yeah, but that’s about it. he’s the man who gets up in the middle of the wedding to try and oppose even if he knows there’s no stopping them (reg is incredibly embarrassed and hating his life choices and trying to get him to sit back down) (barty finds it absolutely hilarious and is delighted to know he’s causing james this much turmoil even after so many years) (lily is very much Done and this is exactly why she didn’t want to invite james) (but barty needed reg there and everyone knows that reg and james are a package deal) (anyway i digress)

#god this ended up being so long I’M SORRY #hope you at least found this entertaining cass MWAH #also i actually don’t think barty and lily would get married but i was trying to make a point and it got out of hand #and i loveeee weddings so they deserve one too even if just hypothetically #anyways i just think bartylily work incredibly well #doesn’t matter if platonic or romantic #they just fit #and it’s unexpected and it doesn’t seem to make any sense except !! it does #that’s their charm #thank u sm for indulging me <333 #asks #bartylily #cass tag <3

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batfamfucker · 2 years

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I will now be personally headcanoning that Bruce pulled Tim aside one day to ask his opinion on if Tim would ever consider changing or adding Alfred to his middle name(s). I've always interpreted Jack Drake as having been abusive towards Tim, due to some of the comics where he's been violent and such (Like the time he destroyed some of Tim's belongings and such when he was angry at him, or the straight up neglect when Jack and Janet went to explore the world regularly and leave Tim behind, forgot his birthday, etc), and so I feel like sometimes Tim would feel icky about keeping his middle name as 'Jackson' after his biological father (I'm surprised he ever kept 'Drake' and didn't just fully move to 'Wayne', but alas). I feel like Bruce would also be aware that Tim sometimes feels left out of the family, especially due to the early years of him and Damian's dynamic and constantly being told he was never Bruce's 'real son'. It doesn't take a lot of common sense to realise those kind of words will linger, even after the brothers have improved their relationship. I had originally thought to consider this with Damian, but he's already named after Thomas, so I feel as though Bruce would choose Tim so that he gets to both honour his second father, and let Tim know that he will always be Bruce's son and a part of the family, regardless of DNA. Tim accepts, and so his middle name becomes Alfred, instead of Jackson.

Alfred doesn't find out until he's going over some family legal documents and sees it. He cries when he does.

#I feel as though Bruce would have also considered Jason especially when Jason adores Alfred #And he knows Jason can also feel estranged from the family for obvious reasons #So I feel he would've discussed it with him too as well as Dick to let them know that he isn't trying to leave either of them out #Or make them feel like they're not his sons. But he thinks it would really help Tim's ongoing doubts whilst ensuring he wasn't named #After his abuser (Again I'm ignoring the Drake thing)#And I think Jason and Dick would be understand of it. Dick is named after his biological dad who he loves so he's all good. And Jason is #Aware that Bruce loves him after some therapy and family counselling sessions that Bruce took them to to improve their relationship #Which worked. So Jason knows Bruce is always going to cherish him as his son despite their history. And also both #Brothers are very aware of Tim's feelings (Jason and Tim have bonded over it. He knows how bad Tim can get mentally when he thinks about it #too much) so Jason is completely fine letting his baby brother have the name. Makes up for those bad early days between them a little #Which Jason does still feel guilty about and has talked over with Tim during some of their deep talks where he apologised for it.#Either way I feel like it's the classic Big BrotherTM who also wants his Baby BrotherTM to be okay even if he doesn't admit it #I'm also headcanoning that Cass who didn't have a middle name was approached by Bruce who asked if she liked Martha as a contender #She definitely did #Anyway- I won't tag everyone because I've used half the tag limit already so just the ones in the post #Tim Drake #Bruce Wayne #Alfred Pennyworth #Robin #Red Robin #Batman #Agent A #Tim Drake Wayne #Tim Wayne #Batfamily #Abuse mention tw #Headcanon

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junkmailmusubi · 9 days

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late night chip-posting! oh yeah !

#ive had this littl guy in my head for a while but ive recently become obsessed w/ him #see i actually /do/ have agent ocs but i never draw them for. Multiple Reasons (mainly lack of confidence)#chip is 3's lil buddy. hes kinda dumb but thats reasonable bc hes like. five #youd never know his name is chip bc 3 has so many other potato chip/french fry-themed nicknames for him #“crinkle-cut i have to ask you. are you ready to take on the world.” “i thought his name was ruffle?” “well it's crinkle-cut now. too bad”#+ he does get a “proper” salmonid title later. it's 'Seasoned Savior - Kin of Three Stormstruck Frontiers'#“it's chip! he doesn't!” “doesn't what?” “uh - think. probably.”#cass's creations and conjurations #splatoon #chr: chip 🍟🐟#⛺🪲

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ninawolv3rina · 25 days

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Thinking about the dysfunctional found family that is the X-Men again (and throwing my Spidersona into the mix makes it no better)

#honestly rogue and kurt have my favorite dynamics with logan #rogue and logan get into the dumbest scrapes sometimes cuz they have less than a brain cell when tneyre together #and so of course thats p much cass' dynamic with him as well #except cass is also kind of a loose canon in a different way than rogue is #i think rogues powers have led her to being overcautious in a lot of ways #and cass absolutely does not have those hangups #like rogue would not be venom #ever #shes too conscious about the effect her powers have on others #and meanwhile cass is like hel yeah symbiote babey #so logan does have to get a little more firm with cass than he does with rogue but ultimately if u put the xmen in a bar with karaoke #cass and logan WILL be singing some stupid song by the end of the night #cass carver #x spider #cassidy carver

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teleportationmagic · 1 year

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There is a dead boy in the Batcave.

Not literally, of course, but the glass cage marks the place where blood and bone would be too gory to leave behind. Too unsanitary. Father’s not the type to abide by that – at least not from what mother’s told him, and what his surveillance has revealed. But the suit is clean enough, so they sit next to a ghost and let it take up space in the room, a physical weight demarcating it’s territory. The rest of them – Oracle and Nightwing and Drake all float around it, like fish splitting around a rock in a river.

He'd think it’s weakness to grieve this hard, this long, but allowances are made for strong men, and his father is a strong man. The gravemarker sits, silent in the heart of their operations, next to the giant penny and the t-rex.

And still, some small part of him cannot wonder who it was who left this imprint on every single person in that room, the faint outline of his cape twirling through their upright backs.

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Months later, he finds another gravemarker.

This one isn’t in the Batcave, rather it’s tucked away in the clocktower. He hadn’t spotted it at first, hadn’t been able to put a name to it, but Oracle was the immaculate sort. It was expected, for someone of her pedigree, and the deviation was shocking in its presence.

The paper is laminated. Letters scrawl across the page, constructed incorrectly and ungracefully, weaving backwards and forwards with little rhyme or reason. And yet still, it is clear pages are missing – the transition in how the letters are written is subtle, page to page, but jumps every now and again.

Underneath is black fabric. It’s flexible – tight and form fitting, but still stretchy in the way that Grayson’s suits are. He pulls it forward and it unfurls to reveal a yellow bat.

Batgirl, then. The second. His fingers trace the stark lines, a glossy sort of shine over the black fabric, even under all the dust. Something flips, uncomfortably – he knew this girl. His mother had told him about her pedigree. And yet here she was, dust gathering on evidence of her failures – paper stacked up that showed him nothing.

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He finds the third gravemarker on accident.

The purple fabric is so much unlike Timothy that he can’t help but pull it out. It’s poorly made, compared to the others – the most present comparison he can come to is a bedsheet, too thin to be any good in their line of work. The place he’d found it in is equally puzzling, a blue shoebox that he’d forgotten to throw away, in the back of his closet. He wonders if he’d simply lost it, as buried as it was.

It’s not all that’s in the box, of course. They’d rolled out when he’d lifted the suit – all spilling sideways. There’s a few ticket stubs, a set of keys, a slip of paper with a hasty sketch, and two photo. A blond girl, with a gap-toothed grin and bright green eyes, and an older woman with the same blonde hair, cropped short. It was the only thing that wasn’t caked with years of grime, the pictures clearly digital, then printed out. There’s a name on the back that he doesn’t recognize, not on either of them.

He picks up a sketch – Timothy, he recognizes, in his Robin suit, stylized into a cartoon. A purple figure flits next to him, a streak of blonde pencil crayon following her. Something bounces in the art, young and joyful and wild, wrapped up and kept in old, yellow paper.

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Cold sweeps the house. They’ve done this enough times that Dick is half-certain he should be accustomed to it, but it still feels like a bulldozer through his heart.

The worst part is the forgetting. Every now and again, he looks up and expects Damian to be there – expects to see a dark, short flash of hair. But the hallways are empty, and the walls echo, and he’s done this time after time but he wants the kid back.

He wants him back.

It’s Dick in the end that goes through his things. There are pieces – notebooks and sketchpads filled with drawing. Some more stylized, a round feminine face smiling, sparks flying around her. Pink shaded flowers in the corner. Pencil shavings leaving dark marks where his eraser couldn’t pick up quite enough.

Underneath is an canvas, big and bright – the colours nearly make him gasp when he turns it over, blue and orange and purple spilling out, the sun at dawn. In the front, a bird, the details intelligible in the contrast. Deliberately so. Its wings leave visible trails of smoke behind it.

He can see the brush strokes, underneath. See the smudging, see the small places where he’d set his hand down and left a mark on the bright colours of the background. The trees had been done on top in pencil crayon, tiny and spindly needles reaching out for sun.

He catches tears before they hit the piece, his head bowed low.

Alfred says nothing when he finds him later, perched on a step stool. He hangs it up, loud and proud, lets the light hit it.

In the evening light it glows.

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thelittleredheadedmusician · 6 months

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I write some really niche fics (hopefully some of you just went “no shit, that’s why we’re here” and some went “no shit! Tell more!”) but I feel a little more vindicated for my series of Mia Dearden & John Constantine being reluctant friends fics. I initially justified it as a “Ollie met John once & Dinah is friends with Zatanna so she probably heard of him if not met him once or twice so Mia could have heard of him thru them” AND GUESS FUCKING WHAT. AS OF THE CURRENT BOP ISSUE DINAH NOT ONLY KNOWS JOHN BUT THEY’RE ON DECENT TERMS AND HE KNOWS OLLIE TOO SO LIKE *insert Brooklyn 99 VINDICATION meme here*

#dc comics #kinda #look the current lineup of bop can be described as ‘interesting’ and ‘eclectic’#personally im over harley being in absolutely everything she’s just not a character i really like #& if anything the oversaturation of her has made me dislike her #but! i like the plot so far & dinah does have a history of working w/ people who aren’t heroes esp in bop #i like that they didn’t just ignore babs but would like to know why she can’t be in the loop #love love love to see sin back #have questions about the deal w/ the amazons having her? & the (i think she’s) wildstorm character #cass & barda being birds makes my heart so fucking happy (well barda has been a bird but cass getting to be one!)#& their little friendship is hella fun really enjoying that #dinah’s list in the first issue too!!! so good!!! we love to see references to pre52!!!#AND THE ART OHMYGOD IM OBSESSED WITH IT #like the golden age almost style & john REALLY looked like sting (as he should) it’s just so good #and SO expressive the faces are all so unique & the details so spot on just yes #really excited to see where this goes

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porto-rosso · 10 months

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Anyone else find it weird when people get super up in arms about saying one of the bats is the best at (insert something here like martial arts/detective work/acrobatics)?

#like theyre all good at everything so pointing out areas where each may shine particularly doesn’t bother me?#calling cass the best martial artist doesn’t mean the others aren’t extremely skilled martial artists #saying babs is the smartest doesn’t mean the others are stupid it just means she’s slightly more advanced in a specific field #I think i see people take the most issue with claims that Tim is the best detective #which when he’s being dubbed as ‘the detective’ of the bats I completely understand as it does somewhat imply the others aren’t very skilled #but specifically saying he’s the best detective doesn’t (to me) erase the other bats being good at that #it just kinda gives him a niche #which most of the bats have one way or another #it’s kinda all in phrasing like each can have a speciality but it’s important to word it in a way that doesn’t erase the others skill #as well #that being said I completely understand general exhaustion with oh-look-at-how-good-Tim-is esp with how much dc itself has been pushing that #Tim gets pushed as being the best in general way too much and especially in a really weird way that’s often done to put other robins #(tho particularly Damian) down #which absolutely should be criticized #so this is more about when i see people being super aggressive at the idea that any of the bats could have specialities #sorry this was long and rambley

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breadedsinner · 11 months

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I think an overlying theme across all 3 of my canon girls and their relationships is "I need to believe there's hope for you, so that I can believe there's hope for me, too,".

#DA Tag #This is me just reconciling w the fact #That there's no going back Hervor spares Loghain and that's that #Their situations aren't really the same an outside might think she has no blame #But in her mind she's not a real dwarf and has no honor #So she would respect a man wanting to make things right #For Judith ... you could make the argument it'd be more poignant with Anders #But he does the thing no matter what you do so #BUT she and Seb struggle with wanting things and doubting if they deserve anything so #Seb pretty much knows he's like candy to demons and turns out Judy is too #There was just more to ...untangle with her #And then with Rota well #She all but yells that when she argues with Cass #What hope is there for a criminal that was forced into repentance #If there's to be none for someone who actually wanted it

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shatteredfears-arch · 2 years

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when you look at the voice lines daniela is literally the only one that refers to ethan by name, which in bela’s case makes sense because she wont refer to a man by his name lol, shes way too much of a misandrist, but bela actually does know his name.

in cass’ case… despite hearing cina say it, and hearing daniela talk about him so much, i think she honestly just completely ignored his name and doesnt actually know it at all. it starts with an E, thats all shes got lol, the part of her brain that focuses on concentration was sorta stabbed w a parasite that managed to latch onto her frontal lobe at the minimum, ans scar placement suggests cerebral cortex, i think it managed to barely skip over the brocas area and hit just below to the temporal lobe too (maybe, like its an if since her motor functions are already off due to the cadou causing dyspraxia, some of the equilibrium does appear off as well, but that can be related to the motor functions. ) on her personality. like she already was adhd, autistic, and had dyslexia prior to the infection. she developed dyspraxia after the cadou altered her brain.

honestly the main thing that hints at short term memory issues is probably a game function issue where she can sometimes mention ethan killing bela, but then still calls for her. or if tou kill bela and dani first, she also still tends to call for them while knowing theyre dead. but again, its a video game and that can just be data error lol. but the cadou’s implanted in her brain, girls gonna probably have some memory issues anyways. this post isnt rly abt her cadou tho or the way it effects her brain ima do that later bc its a lot but yEAH

anyways main point of this post; bela just hates men and refuses to give ethan even the decency to refer to him by name, dani knows his name and uses it, cinas said his name multiple times, and cass didnt listen and doesnt care, even in timelines where she survives and he survives and she knows him and even if she got to know him it would probably take weeks, months or even years to get his name right lmao

#and she’ll only hide it sightly they some kind of weird not nickname #the ways cass has probably used her memory issues to lure in new prey lol #and LISTEN bc of the adhd she already has memory issues #if she isnt looking at it its not there #she never stays still long she has to be moving constantly #her attention span to anything she isnt fixated on at the time is zero #bela bitching abt cass’ messes????#cass doesnt even remember making the mess she remembers slaughtering and the fun but she didnt look at the mess therefore it didnt happen #all her mini fights with ethan she gets bored so quickly too bc of him not even trying djdjdksksk #she’ll purposefully frame it as disrespect too like ses caling him the wrong thing to jnsult him #bc cassandra refuses go be embarrassed #!but she honestly just doesnt remember or care sorry ethan #even if she did grow to care even a little bit she wont remember for awhile tho so #probably ur edwin or sometbing #nahbe even just blondie #and thats assuming shes not just calling him prey probably bc shes giving minor respect to heisenbergs claim #bc even tho mother hates him cass does like her uncle well enough jsut bc hes chaotic and ferel #she herself is chaotic and feral which makes her accept heisy as family even if momma doesnt lmao #like yeah. thats my uncle. and my uncles many annoying dog things. made by the lesser uncle. bc other uncle refuses to be feral. not as fun.#cass vc just stab things and ill accept you!!!!#out.

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begaycommittreason · 1 month

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out of context things heard in wayne manor:

bruce: i understand, but pretending you cooked jerry the turkey is not a proportionate response to damian calling you a peasant again

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jason: look there’s a right way and a wrong way to make food. there’s also the bruce way, which is the wrong way except faster and worse

duke: *frantically scribbling notes*

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tim: do you think our relationship was kinda like incest now?

steph, horrified: never open your mouth in my presence again timothy

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dick: so then he’s like—guys. guys are you seriously signing about me in front of my face. i learned it too—hey i do NOT have a butt chin take that back—

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damian: i don’t understand, why does he wear such a ridiculous hat? is it like that margaret poppins woman grayson showed me?

tim, who watched the live action cat in the hat too much as a kid and is about to violently infodump: well you see-

dick: oh god it’s too late

jason: yeah the brats on his own for this one i’m not fucking dealing with that again

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bruce: are you lying?

tim: always. anyway, like i was saying—

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steph: hey what’s up with you and all the redheads

dick: …i’m not discussing this with you

steph, starting to chase him: gingervitus is a serious affliction! you cant run from this

dick, sprinting away: yes the fuck i can

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duke: so is anyone gonna talk about the elephant in the room…

dick:

dick: look i was feeling sentimental and zitka jr. really isn’t any trouble

damian: she is magnificent

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tim: so i dropped out and

duke: wait we can drop out of high school??!!?

bruce: NO.

duke: please bruce ap biology is beating my ass right now

jason: nah tim just got to drop cause bruce was dead and he’s a loser. the real problem is what you’re reading in ap lit right now, because i have thoughts on that curriculum—

duke: i’m not even gonna use half that material in the real world

tim: actually most of our villains have PhDs so their plans are based on pretty real science

duke: not helping timothy

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cass, signing: why are brothers on the ceiling?

jason: tims in timeout from working on his caseload

cass, still confused: yes but why taped to the ceiling

duke: listen if you know a better way of restraining his psycho ass then i’m all ears

cass: and damian?

jason: oh he saw this as free range target practice so he had to go up there too

cass: they are plotting revenge up there

duke: think of it as brotherly bonding

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damian: it’s not my fault he got in the way

bruce: you threw an eclair at lex luthor

damian: i was aiming for drake

tim: bruce we can’t take him anywhere

dick, holding back laughter: timmy you paid four separate people to come to the gala solely to ask lex if they could use his head to see if they had something in their teeth

tim: you have no proof that was me

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duke: look steph, it’s not that we don’t want to help with this

jason: i don’t want to help

duke: it’s more that i don’t think we can physically fit that many people in a shopping cart, and your whole plan kind of hinges on that

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alfred: i’m not mad, just disappointed in you.

every batkid, near tears: sorry alfred

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jason: HE HAD DIPLOMATIC IMMUNITY AS THE FUCKING WHAT—

bruce: listen—

tim, mouth full and brain empty: the ambassador to iran. crazy right?

dick: tim please

#batfam #dc #bruce wayne #dick grayson #jason todd #tim drake #duke thomas #cassandra cain #stephanie brown #damian wayne #batfamily #batman

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cobbleztone · 2 months

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I have seen too many posts of Bruce being a tired old man who understands nothing his kids talk about, but im tired of that crap, Bruce is definitely autistic and he learns everything there is to know about what his kids enjoy so he can bond with them

Dick is into dinosaurs? Bruce now knows more than any paleontologist on earth.

Jay is really into a specific book series? Bruce has now read all the books, watched all film adaptations, and he has spent countless nights theorizing about it.

Tim is into skateboarding? Bruce is now a professional skateboarder and knows how to make a board at home.

Damien is into animals? Well, Bruce just got himself a PhD in zoology

Duke is into chess? Well Bruce is now an expert in chess

Cass is into dancing? Bruce has learned every form of dance in existence

And if you thought he only does this for his legal children, then you thought wrong

Bruce learns that Barbara is into fantasy rpgs? Well, Bruce just learned all about fantasy games

Stephanie is into cooking? Bruce now knows every recipe in existence

They all find it odd but weirdly endearing that he knows so much about what they all enjoy

#bruce wayne being a dad #dc comics #jason todd #bruce wayne #damien wayne #dick grayson #headcanon #batfam #stephanie brown #cassandra cain #barbara gordon #duke thomas #tim drake

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brucewaynehater101 · 2 months

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AU for Bats and the JL

When Duke joins the brigade, the Bats are ecstatic to introduce him to the JL. Why? None of the JL actually believe that the Bats are non-meta humans. Are they supposed to believe that Batman can do all that he can because he trains really hard?

The JL is so convinced that the Bats are lying about not having powers that they've included it in New Member initiation. It's considered "rude" and "mean" to call out Bats on their very obvious power usage. In fact, guessing Bat powers is half the fun! They gather all of the non-Bat members to have potluck discussions about it.

Obviously, the Bats are well aware of these meetings. They have their own gatherings where they laugh at the suggestions or come up with strategies to fuck with the JL.

For Bruce, the JL is convinced that the man has control over shadows as well as increased mental compacities. Bruce is way too skilled in disappearing in a room full of people with enhanced senses. Also, he knows facts about almost every subject.

For Dick, that man should not be able to move like he does. He either doesn't have bones or has increased elasticity. Dick's favorite JL memory is crawling down the Watchtower halls with his joints in weird places. Green Arrow's scream is forever recorded and backed up into five different servers.

At first, the JL thought Jason had emotional manipulation capabilities. The hope, courage, and passion he inspired could not have been naturally occurring. Then, after he re-emerged as the Red Hood, obviously his powers are resurrection -_-

Tim? Kid's a cryptic ancient creature. The creepy kid will stare at you without blinking throughout a two hour meeting. Stay away from him and don't piss him off.

Steph nearly laughed herself into a coma when someone tried to convince Hal that Spoiler gets her power from the color purple. Her switching to Robin's costume caused a riot and the JL members frantically scheduled an emergency non-Bat meeting. Should they intervene with Bruce forcing her to wear a costume without aid to her powers? The few months she was Robin were tense for the members.

Damian has an ability to understand martial arts on an unparalleled level. What other non-meta ten year old can utilize a sword so effectively?

Cass is an entity. They don't know what she is, but they fear her all the same.

Barbara is all-knowing. Her ability to collect information and navigate technology can not be naturally occurring.

Now, the JL is faced with the first Bat to admit he has powers. Does that mean none of the others have powers? Is Signal's just too obvious to deny?

#dc comics #dc universe #dc robin #batman #tim drake #bruce wayne #damian wayne #jason todd #dick grayson #cass wayne #barbara gordon #duke thomas #dc red robin #dc red hood #dc spoiler #dc signal #dc nightwing #steph brown

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cannedinternets · 23 days

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Yanno, a thing i see a LOT in fics is that the Batfam think Danny is a meta, b/c ghosts don't exist. Which is valid, i mean they ARE a team of detectives with a shitton of wacky themed rogues and, at least on batman's part, a noted distaste for and disbelief in magic and the supernatural.

But bruce and tim have both worked with ghosts directly. (Maybe the others too? fuck there's a LOT of comics and animated series and-) So i think it would be much funnier if they think he's not a ghost, b/c Ghosts Don't Work That Way.

In fact, b/c Communication Is Not The Batman's Strong Suit, I think it's funny if all of them are wrong but for different reasons.

Bruce - has worked with Deadman. You can't see or interact with ghosts without magical outside intervention. Thinks Danny is a magic user who transforms a la Shazam/Captain Marvel.

Dick - Clown trauma? Mind control Trauma? One of your rogues tried to brainwash you to be his son/weapon? Damn kid you're like me if i had it even worse. Thinks Danny is a "regular" kid vigilante with a schtick.

Babs - Well the video evidence she can find deffo lines up with him being a super, but there's a hardcore blackout around his town, he doesn't legally exist, AND any outside info she runs into is usually cutoff by someone (tucker or technus depending), AND he's mentioned cloning. So he's probably a designer "cloned" (ugh dc that's not how cloning works) meta kid that's being taken advantage of by the government and/or cadmus.

Cass - Thinks Danny is a terrible liar (true) who is counting on the refuge in audacity to keep people from realizing what he is (also true). Thinks he's someone who got themed meta powers in a lab accident and is playing up the ghost thing b/c he fights ghosts constantly.

Jason - Glowing green eyes? Ability to manifest green constructs that look like they're made of goo? Constant death jokes? Aww, this dude is just another me but he is also a meta/somehow got anime girl powers out of getting dunked in the lazarus pits.

Tim - worked with Secret. Ghosts can fly, shapeshift, go intangible, teleport, posses people. Thinks phantom is an actual ghost that is possessing/overshadowing Danny, possibly consensually? He's looking into it. Ironically, is the closest to the truth.

Steph - Hasn't seen Danny do anything that the other bats can't do, and HAS seen him work on an engineering project for 16 hours straight. Thinks Danny is something like the bats, either under-powered or completely non-powered and makes up for it with tech and mystique. Also thinks Danny is a great ally in gremlinship.

Duke - his Ghost Sight does NOT play well with ghosts, ironically. Thinks Danny is some sort of eldritch horror with a human guise. He seems cool tho, Duke isn't gonna judge someone based on looks even if they do give him migraines.

Damian - thinks that Danny is a Pit Demon and you are all insane.

Jarro - thinks Danny is a Green Martian. Also thinks Danny is awesome.

#dpxdc #danny phantom #batfam

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