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#there were already so many layers to his character in AT but now it feels like we get to dive deeper
astearisms · 8 months
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fionna and cake drawings before and after watching the episodes so far. it’s nostalgic and somehow cathartic and poignant and relatable and—it just started
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chrollohearttags · 7 months
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kinktober • day two
kink: office sex
character: nanami kento
show : Jujutsu Kaisen
fic type: drabble ( wc: 1.2K)
content warning + themes: choking (he uses his tie), spit play, missionary, squirting, daddy’s used a couple times, infidelity, hint of toxic nanamin
───✱*.。:。✱*.:。✧*.。✰──── ───✱*.。:。✱*.:。✧*.。
“K-Kent—I’m gonna come if you don’t stop! I’ll make a mess..ruin all of the newest reports.”
“Correct me if I’m wrong, sweetheart..but is that not the point? Besides..it’s nothing we can’t fix.”
the type of banter that one would ever expect to be partaken during such a sexy, intimate moment. It was a scene akin to something from a movie or a corny, cliche porno. Alas though, it was your reality..back pressed to the pinewood desk, legs hiked up midair and three fingers hooked inside of your cheek. Being thrashed around on the base of your boss’ cock. Sharp thrusts being fed to your fertile little cunt…making a mess would have been quite the understatement at this point. A blanket like sheath and strings of your creamy arousal dripping all over his shaft. Honestly, he was the only man who could ever invoke such a reaction from you.
“Tell me though, my dear?..Can he make you do this? Hmm..has that boyfriend of yours ever made you come like this? You’re so turned on right now…” it was a fact that CEO and your secret fling, Nanami Kento was quite proud of. Holding you up after hours, long after the remainder of the staff had dissipated and gone home. Using the guise of some ‘special assignment’ that he only entrusted in your hands to have you squirting all over him. “We—really shouldn’t be doing this!—ahh fuck! It’s so wrong.” The words flowed from your mouth yet they meant nothing. Not when your body was singing an entirely different tune. One where you were writhing underneath him and sloshing around in your own slick. Having ripped your top open, Kento glared vehemently as your ample breasts bounced around, crashing against each other. In truth, there was nothing your sorry ass excuse of a man..if he could even be called one, could do with you. A woman of your pedigree deserved nothing but the best in every single aspect, including dick. You had been employed here for three years and not once had he ever seen that asshole bringing you lunch or flowers. But rather, aggravation and headaches about some girl he had been messing around with or how he had taken your car whilst you were out working. It utterly repulsed him! So he was going to vet every bit of his frustrations by fucking you senseless..
“But it feels so…fucking right? Wouldn’t you agree, sweetheart? I mean, it surely seems like you do with the way you’re squeezing my dick.”
for all the days that he had watched you strut about throughout the office halls, wearing something far too revealing and rousing..all the nights he had dreamt of getting you alone and letting his tongue trail up your thighs as he teased that soaking center. Knowing the sheer anticipation alone had you turned on; waiting for him to peel back those panties and letting that sticky layer of arousal be exposed to the cool elements. Watching those nipples stiffen up as he pinched them between his fingertips…taking all of the time in the world to pleasure you. Which luckily came to fruition tonight. He had you panting like a little dog in heat, salivating and falling all over yourself..having already invoked one orgasm, he was hoping to produce so many, you’d barely be able to function. Wielding that dark tan tie that had cheetah print littering the material, Kento fastened the grip around his knuckles, tugging tighter as to slightly restrict your air. Being choked definitely turned you on more than you’d care to let on. Also, it would keep you reigned in, just in case you decided to run from the dick!..
“Tell the truth. He can’t get you this wet. Now can he? I’m the only one that can, right? This is the type of fucking you deserve, isn’t it?” Questioning with gentle coos as he slid a thumb between your lips to suckle on. Those innocent looking eyes glaring right up at him. Feeding you a soft slap to the cheek, Kento posed the question once more before ramming his cock deeper. “Y-yes, daddy.” Evoking a smirk and earning yourself a sloppy kiss as he placed a hand to the center of your stomach. “Thaaat’s my good girl. Now you just keep coming on this dick. That’s your only job right now, understand?” To which you’d nod, reassuring him you’d do as he said. Those quivering legs rested atop his shoulder blades, ankles laced with gentle pecks to assist in calming you down. When he’d notice your gaze starting to falter and your head falling backwards, Kento made haste in snatching it back up before hooking your jaws with two fingers.
“Hey, eyes up here, sweetheart. I didn’t give you permission to look away. Focus on this dick, nothing else.” Which was all but inevitable as that swollen appendage pounded into you. Hitting that sensitive core each time he thrusted in and out. A thick coat of pearlescent cream slathered over all that shaft, it was such a delectable sight. But Kento was a little greedy, egotistical if you will. He couldn’t let up until he saw you convulsing. Which wasn’t too far off base because once he hooked your jaw, you’d begin to pant as he sped up that heavy pounding. Not letting up until he felt that pussy tightening around him and clutching as if you didn’t want him to pull out..
“Kent!—I'm gonna come..”
“Ah..not yet. There’s one more thing I need.”
coiling your fingers together, Kento leaned down and gently brushed the top of your forehead before marking it with a kiss. “Tell me you love me..right now. Say it..” full and we’ll aware of the fact that you were already cheating but telling another man you loved him, only to turn around and be forced to go home and say it to your boyfriend was nothing more than a slap in the face. Even so, the immense pleasure and intensity of the moment had taken its toll on you so with his thumb caressing your cheek, you’d utter the fateful phrase:
“I love you, Kento.” Bringing a devious grin of sheer satisfaction to his face. With that, he’d prompt you to release and suddenly, a shower of sticky rain splattered his tan suit and blue button down that had been halfway undone. A sight he’d never grow tired of. Only to give you his load in return right after. You’d meet in a haze of passionate kisses to center you from those climatic highs. You’d stay like that for a few minutes; limbs entangled and lips crashing together…finally pulling away, you’d begin to chuckle, completely overtaken by bliss. Patting your asscheek with a gentle slap, he’d usher you up with his opposite hand to help you gather your bearings.
“Hey, let’s get out of here. The cleaning crew will be coming in a little while.” Informing you as he buttoned that shirt back up and fastened his pants. But whilst you were getting re-dressed, making the best attempt you could to make yourself look presentable and not as if you had just gotten ravaged by your boss, it was then that a familiar contact would appear across the screen of your iPhone..
Satoru 💍
you felt a sinking sensation in the out of your stomach, a combination of guilt and anxiety lingering but it didn’t matter. Because as far as you were concerned, the only man who could satisfy you was right here.
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mylonelylittlestar · 3 months
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My little star
Characters: Xavier Summary: random relationship headcanons with Xavier Warnings: None A/N: I've completely fallen in love with Love and Deepspace, especially with Xavier. It's truly hopeless
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the type of boyfriend to get you matching pyjamas
he gets you so many that they slowly start to replace all of your own
likes to match with you even if you don't live together, so sometimes he just texts you to ask which pyjamas you're wearing so he can change into the matching one after he showered
if you ever gift him slippers, blankets, or pillows, he will keep them forever (even if it's something goofy like those big fluffy bunny slippers)
the best person to ask for good midnight snacks. He can recommend fantastic instant noodles, chips, crackers, or other snacks that are light and won't give you stomach aches late at night or negatively impact your sleep in any other way
very interested in your skincare routine (if you have one) and will try out any mask or cream that you give him
if you come up with a routine for him (a simple one, maybe, like the basic cleanser > toner > moisturizer), he will follow it diligently, dragging himself out of bed before he sleeps every day to do it because you were the one to pick those products for him and he doesn't want to waste that
he feels like it connects you to him, even if your routine is completely different and a bit more complicated
never cries during movies, no matter how sad they might be, but he does (on very rare occasions) get a bit teary-eyed
he will hold you if you cry during a movie, and he would never even think about making fun of you for it
he does secretly think that it's cute that you get so worked up about a movie
can sleep through anything. a bomb could go off in his house and he wouldn't know that it happened until he woke up
has seen every single episode of any shitty sitcom you can think of at least three times because he occasionally watches them while he sleeps
sometimes he quotes them but because he knows each of these shows so well now he always quotes the lesser known scenes and no one gets what he's talking about
you start to understand his references after a while, so sometimes he will quote some obscure scene from a super unpopular sitcom that got cancelled after one season and you're the only one laughing
secretly sneaks to the arcade sometimes to practice the claw machine game because he wants to get you the plushies you don't have yet (and to impress you)
he ends up getting dozens of repeats of plushies that you already own. he collects in a small storage room in his apartment that used to be empty
he ends up giving them away when the collection gets out of control, donating them to a children's hospital nearby
gets all shy when you find out about it, blushing bright red like a tomato (or a wasabi octopus)
knows about every single 24 hour store in the city because of his odd sleeping habits and always knows what to do no matter what time it is
you can't sleep and want to go on a date at 3:27 am? he knows a place
if someone is mean to you he will try his hardest to deescalate the situation, but he's also fully willing to fight the person if that doesn't work
I mean have you read his Anecdotes 2? He doesn't give a fuck. He'd prefer not to fight, sure, but if it's unavoidable? What is he gonna do? Not fight and defend you? Ridiculous.
The fandom has already started turning him into this soft uwu stereotype, but the thing is that that's... just not him? He's sweet and kind, yes, but that's not all he is. He's complicated! He has layers!
if he ever falls asleep during a date he would feel awful about it for days, even if you reassure him that it's fine and that you're glad that he feels safe enough around you to fall asleep
he tries to make it up to you with a different date and he falls asleep again, which starts a vicious, endless cycle
when he finally does get over his guilt it's only because you fall asleep during a date after you had a long day at work
knows when you cheat in kitty cards, but sometimes he just lets you get away with it, especially if he knows you had a stressful day at work. He hopes that the win will cheer you up
his good night kisses are forehead kisses while his good morning kisses are on top of your head if you didn't sleep over or on the cheek if you did
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Hoops, Thief and Tease
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Characters: Buggy x Reader
Warnings: slight language/suggestive themes (how can you not?)
Summary: You infiltrate Buggy's circus again. He hates that you do it and he hates himself for falling harder each time...
A/n: I was inspired by the song Dopemang by Kiiara. Specifically the line "If you f- with me, I f- with you" which felt appropriate.
A few hours of his absence was all it took for Buggy’s crew to be knocked out with a perfumed bouquet. A signature move that was repeated each time you had visited his treasure boxes without invitation. He marched through the tent to see if you had taken anything else, silently plotting revenge. When he reached the main ring, he heard a soft creaking from above as he crossed the floor.
Buggy’s eyes moved up and there you were, calmly seated on a hoop as it swayed back and forth. He was pissed that you had managed to infiltrate his domain again, furious that you had stolen from his personal treasure trove again, and absolutely hated the way you looked so ethereal in the air.
He had asked you to join his crew many times over the years and each time you pressed a kiss to the corner of his mouth and declined.
“How did you get in here?” He called out, voice clearly bothered.
Swaying, you hummed softly and rest your head against the curve of the hoop. “The door was open.”
Buggy rolled his eyes at the lie. It didn’t matter now, you had already found a way in.
The hoop began its descent to the ground and you pivoted your legs enough to make it spin ever so delicately. You held on the sides, closed your eyes and leaned back just enough to feel the cool air against your face.
Humming with content, you opened your eyes. Gripping the hoop on either side of your thighs, you pushed forward and released one hand. Now dangling in elegant circles, your legs moved to swim through the popcorn scented air. You did this until you were close enough to the ground, releasing your hand from the hoop entirely you landed perfectly - face to face with the blue-haired pirate whose eyes were caught in a daze.
“Hi, Buggy.” You whispered, a smile gracing your face.
It took the man all his will power not to fall into pieces at your voice and the closeness. He had to remember that he was furious with you but the longer you breathed his air, he was forgetting it all.
You leaned forward, lips ghosting his. “This is where you say it back.”
Buggy closed his eyes and took in a deep breath to clear his head but your scent fogged his thoughts, replacing them with images of him peeling back the layers of your clothes until he got to your bare skin…
No - grr! He had to stop.
Buggy opened his eyes and inhaled sharply, snapping back to reality. He stared at where you had moved a few paces back to the hoop hovering above ground. You took a seat and rocked your heels back just enough to start a small swing.
“You can’t barge in here whenever you want.” He said plainly. “I have rules.”
You smirked. “So do I and it’s very simple - steal my treasure once and I’ll claim it back, piece by piece when you least expect it.”
“Most people let it go.”
You sent him a small shrug. “I’m not 'most people'.”
By the East Blue, he knew that all too well.
“What’s wrong, Buggy?" You taunted. "Feel frustrated that you can’t stop me? Annoyed that you're losing treasure? Tired that I-”
Buggy marched in your direction and grabbed the sides of the hoop inadvertently trapping you.
“You infuriate me.” The words may have come from his mouth but he couldn’t put much truth to it. You didn't
Smiling back, you tilt your head to read the emotion in his eyes. Then you leaned in. “Is that all I do?”
That was all it took to break his resolve. Buggy brought a hand to clasp around your neck firmly before slamming his mouth over yours. Your hands gripped the hoop tight so you wouldn’t fall back as the air was knocked out of your lungs.
He knew how the night was going to end - in a splendor of bliss. He knew how he’d wake in the morning - stomach sinking after you had gone again.
Buggy would have to make peace with your choice to leave but for now, he’d settle with painting you with his red lips for as long as he could.
Masterlist here (for more One Piece)
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summary: i'm back on my "'i have more knowledge on x topic than all your advisers together, i just couldn’t progress through the ranks for one reason or another, so you should definitely make me your concubine, so i can gossip about your minister of finance’s stupid proposal while wearing expensive shit and fine dining and then we slowly fall in love' royal au" bs again, so have some rambles because there are a lot of possible constellations here
characters: shouto :: kenma :: inui/koko :: al-haitham/kaveh x gn! reader
general masterlist
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𝐒𝐇𝐎𝐔𝐓𝐎
You could practically feel the daggers being glared into your skull. This entire meeting so far, the prince’s closest adviser had narrowed his eyes at you, a gesture which you only returned with a coy smile.
Really, just because it wasn’t common for a royal concubine to attend a meeting concerning safety measures at the upcoming masquerade ball, there was no need for such hostility.
Then again, maybe the adviser was so foul-tempered because of the physical position you found yourself in. But it wasn’t your fault they hadn’t prepared another seat for you or that Shouto was notoriously unbothered with social etiquette. So, if the prince ordered his concubine to sit on his lap instead, who were you to argue?
You doubted he glared at you because he was aware you had been investigating him or that you knew he and his fellow spies were planning an assassination attempt on the royal whose arm was currently lazily curled around your waist.
Surely, “concubine” was not exactly the title you had had in mind when agreeing to work as an intelligence agent on the Todoroki court but considering the former crown prince Touya had basically gone up in smoke after an attempt on his life, placing yourself right next to the prince where an enemy wouldn’t expect might not be a bad idea.
Besides, since you had taken the prince up on his offer, you had been able to enjoy many luxuries you could previously not even dream of. Delicacies practically melted on your tongue, the material of your clothes was of a quality so fine it was like dressing in air and the library held rare books you normally couldn’t get your hands on just like that.
You also had to admit, pretending to be Shouto’s lover wasn’t exactly torture either. Not only was he as handsome as they come but he was also very well-mannered towards you even in private. The clumsy side only few got to see when he let his guard down was also quite adorable.
So, to say you were quite comfortable where you were and had no intention of giving up your spot any time soon was an understatement.
“Your Highness is it really necessary to bring,” the adviser paused momentarily as he gestured at you, “this person to a meeting such as this? How can we be sure they are not working for an opposing kingdom, relaying our security measures to the enemy?”
You caught yourself before a snort escaped you. Seriously, how was nobody onto this guy before you came around?
“I have no doubt about their loyalty to me and the kingdom,” Shouto said, tone even as always, yet his hand around your waist tightened. “Besides, their safety might be compromised just like mine, so this information should be shared with them as well.”
“That’s right,” you goated, a sharp grin on your lips as you reached backwards over your shoulder to run your fingers down Shouto‘s neck as you held eye contact with the adviser. “I’ve shown my devotion to the prince in ways you never could.”
Soon you’d watch the light drain from his eyes as you ended his miserable life but for now you’d find amusement in how they widened in indignation.
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𝐊𝐄𝐍𝐌𝐀
“Your Highness! I must ask you to stay in the medic’s quarters!” Said medic was fussing around you as you pulled the outer layer of your clothes back on. “I dressed the wound and used a minor healing spell but you need to rest! A-and your medicine—“
“I can rest in my quarters too,” you sighed, already halfway out of the door. “Someone will come pick up the treatment later.”
The medic was still stammering long after you already set out towards your room, trying not to put too much pressure on your side. You didn’t think it’d be that big of a deal but apparently the monster’s claws that had grazed your skin were laced in some sort of venom, the pain of which left you wheezing when you received another blow to the stomach.
Half stumbling, half falling into your room, you reckoned whatever spell the medic had cast hadn’t done much to rid your body of the poison, especially if you remembered how he had floundered once you first drudged into the infirmary. No wonder you had gone behind your parents’ backs to employ someone who actually understood his craft.
“Whoa what happened to you?” Kenma lifted his head from his magic-driven game board at the sound of the door opening. His sharp amber eyes studied you from head to toe, taking in the ripped clothes and collection of bruises and scratches. “You look like death chewed you up and spit you back out.”
“Thanks,” you retorted just as sarcastically, working to rid yourself of the rest of your armour, wincing when you strained the area around your ribs. “Must be the poison.”
“Poison?” Immediately, Kenma had perked up, already rounding the table, his game forgotten. “What poison? And where? And why didn’t you lead with that?”
Usually, the guy tried to make himself as small as possible, hoping to blend into the background. But whenever you dragged in yet another weird and wonderful ailment from out in the wild, your shy healer found himself in the habit of becoming a little bossy. Other royals might take offence if their concubines used that kind of tone but you had to admit you didn’t really mind.
“Well, it’s not like you gave me much of a chance to explain,” you laughed, pulling your shirt off and letting it pile up with the rest of your things, then wriggled your eyebrows at the blond. “So, where do you want me?”
“You are the worst, even when you’re dying,” Kenma rolled his eyes before a warm hand settled on your bare back and nudged you towards the bed. “For now, just lie down. And tell me exactly what the hell happened to you.”
Without any resistance, you settled down and watched as Kenma got to work. It was fascinating each time, even if you didn’t understand much of it and you were the one having to be treated. Whenever he focused on something, he adopted this no-nonsense expression, lips tightened into a line and eyebrows drawn together. You didn’t even want to start thinking about the way your skin tingled where his fingers touched you, well aware that the reason for it wasn’t the magic Kenma used.
“I told the doc someone would pick up my medicine later,” you spoke up once your healer had finished his work and both of you were just lingering within the same space.
As always when you told Kenma something he didn’t want to hear, he made one of the most expressive faces of disgust a human could muster.
“I’ll make sure to trip on the way,” he shrugged and you were aware he might actually do it too. “I didn’t spend all this time healing you just so that idiot can poison you again with whatever concoction he came up with this time.”
“Just what would I do without you?” Brushing a stray strand of hair out of his eyes, you didn’t miss how Kenma, the guy who used to flinch at people coming near him, leaned slightly into your touch.
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𝐈𝐍𝐔𝐈 / 𝐊𝐎𝐊𝐎
The golden light of the sinking sun illuminated the balcony as birds chirped their last songs of the day. In the midst of the flowers blooming across the railing and the castle walls, three people sat around a table filled with fruits, cheese and many other delicious foods, eating and laughing together.
“But to come back to your Minister of Finance’s proposal,” Koko, who seemingly hadn’t taken his eyes off the kingdom’s budget sheet, spoke up. Splitting off a few of the coins from the stack in front of him to visualise the share he was thinking about, he offered his insight. “I think we should use a cut of the newly allocated funds to strengthen the army’s equipment. The knights could do with new armour, especially considering the neighbouring kingdom has been less than friendly lately.”
“What new funds are we talking about?” You inquired, not having been privy to the meeting prior this day. 
“The party we sent out recently was more successful than we expected them to be,” Inui clued you in with a small smile as he studied what Koko proposed.
“Ah, the expedition that was my idea and that I equipped with the right tools. In that case,” you said, a mischievous glint in your eyes, before you made the stack of coins levitate over your outstretched palm, “I think we should use it to build a magic tower. It would help more with defence than equipping the knights, considering what fun things I could do with one.”
“Don’t be ridiculous,” Koko scolded, reaching over the table to snatch the coins back. “How should we justify the King’s concubine wishing for a magic tower?”
While you shrugged, Seishu took your hand and answered much gentler than the black haired man. 
“I have to agree with Koko. Not because I doubt you could do a lot of great things with such a tower but because we already had a lot of trouble explaining why the lightning only struck the enemy’s side in the last battle,” he sighed, giving you an understanding look he knew had you giving in already. “The public doesn’t know we have a magic user on our side and word of construction would spread fast. Don’t forget why you went into hiding in the first place.”
“Yeah yeah, I understand, no magic tower. But, how about,” you leant back in your chair, tossing a coin you had hidden up your sleeve before Koko could retrieve it, “one or the other magic tome? Nobody would even notice. Just say it’s for a new necklace or whatever else concubines usually get.”
“Are you suggesting we commit fraud?” Koko levelled his accusatory gaze at you.
“I don’t know, am I?” You innocently asked, batting your eyelashes at him. “It would be for the good of the people, after all.”
“How is you getting a new toy good for the people?”
“I could make the grains grow faster or whatever the people usually pray for,” you shrugged. “I’m at least granting their wishes.”
“I thought you were interested in necromancy recently,” Seishu laughed knowingly. “I’m no expert in the field but how is that helping with making the crops grow?”
“I’m sure a walking dead body or two would scare off the crows,” you said as seriously as you could. “It might also scare off thieves, now that I think about it.”
Koko just looked at you, horrified, while Seishu laughed at your nonchalance. When the former regained his senses, he reprimanded you again. 
“We are not using tax money, so you can experiment with the undead and unleash them on the public!”
“Eh, it was worth a try,” you relented before popping another grape in your mouth.
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𝐀𝐋-𝐇𝐀𝐈𝐓𝐇𝐀𝐌 / 𝐊𝐀𝐕𝐄𝐇
You were well aware of the whispers that filled the halls of the castle when you weren’t present. 
Kaveh was probably a more conventional concubine to take, considering his innate kindness and striking beauty. Clearly, when he waltzed into the room beside you, it was like the sun was rising before everyone’s eyes. Yeah, he was probably an expected choice.
Al-Haitham, on the other hand…
It wasn’t exactly his physique which raised people’s questions. Moreso it was his gruff temper and apparent boredom with most topics, burying his nose in a book and brushing people off with less than a single word at times, that made your staff shake their heads at your appointment.
Not that it mattered much what other people thought.
What did matter, however, was that your country’s infrastructure had improved significantly since you made your peculiar choice of companions. After most critical meetings concerning upcoming construction, your subordinates believed your return to your chambers meant you just had to relieve some pent-up stress. Yet, those “steamy” nights were spent hunched over maps and graphs of your nation, pointing out the flaws in your advisers’ proposals and redoing blueprints of planned buildings.
Perhaps nobody else in the castle was aware of it, but Al- Haitham and Kaveh were a genius strategist and brilliant architect respectively, responsible for the projects the public praised you most for. And that had been the nature of your relationship in the beginning. They patched out your advisers’ proposals and you made sure they were compensated accordingly, unconventional as the methods may be.
Though, you supposed, after working together for a while, the titles you had given them may not be so wrong anymore. Long nights spent agonising over the ideal location for a new project had turned into quiet evenings lounging around your quarters, enjoying fine wine and lingering touches. Having the two around had become a great sense of comfort to you and running into them between meetings and stacks of paperworks waiting for you made a spark of fondness flutter in your chest.
However, running into both of them at the same time also meant the unlikely pair were probably bickering. This time, you could actually hear them before you rounded the corner.
“I’m telling you, if we use this type of wood-”
“It would rot under the environmental influences faster than you could complete construction.”
“Why, you…!”
Pinching the bridge of your nose, you exhaled ready to calm down the situation somehow. Then, you came face to face with them and had an entirely new idea on how to mediate. Haitham had his arms crossed as he regarded the blond with an unimpressed expression, the pose accentuating the way his biceps and triceps flexed. With Kaveh turned away from you, you had a clear view of his back, as always exposed by the flowy robes he wore.
Sure, they might not be the most usual concubines you could’ve chosen, but that didn’t matter.
“Strategy meeting in my quarters, now. Royal orders.”
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soraontop · 4 months
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THE TRUTH UNTOLD
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title the truth untold ( pt. 1 of 10 things i hate about you series )
summary how it all begins.
genre angst, fluff towards the end, slice of life
characters jung sora (8th female member oc of enhypen), nam iseul (female oc, former 9th female member oc of enhypen), park jongseong, park sunghoon (briefly), brief cameos of other enhypen members
warnings poly ot7 enhypen au with 8th female member. knetz are really mean to sora. slut shaming, self-deprecating thoughts. enhypen are still learning about sora’s many, many layers. unrequited (?) love. idiots in love. pining.
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note aaaa okay sorry it took a min. here is the first part of how enhasora began. just letting you know … prepare for a ride cause im not gonna make it easy on them. 🫶🫶
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Jung Sora knew one thing before ENHYPEN debuted. She was absolutely and utterly fucked.
It starts a month before ENHYPEN’s debut. Iseul gathers Sora and the seven boys in their living room, the room cluttered as always when all nine of them were in their tiny dorm. She knows what’s coming before it leaves Iseul’s mouth. She thinks of how she knows Iseul better than anyone.
“I’m leaving ENHYPEN.”
The room goes still, and Sora’s heart drops, even though she expected it. There’s an awful, funny feeling in the pit of her stomach and she feels like she’s going to throw her breakfast back up.
Sora inhales sharply and that seems to break the rest of the members’ silence.
“You’re kidding, right,” Jake chuckles, head ducking down. They wait for her to laugh, telling them it’s a joke. But she doesn’t. His head snaps up, “Wait, seriously?”
At Iseul’s silence, Sunghoon stands and walks out of the living room, slamming the door to the bedroom shut. Sora flinches, closing her eyes briefly. She feels eyes on her and looks to see Heeseung staring at her. She smiles weakly, breaking eye contact to turn back to Iseul.
“I don’t understand,” Niki said, brows furrowing. “Why? We haven’t even debuted yet.”
Iseul swallows, “I— I thought I could do it, but I can’t.” Her eyes connect with Sora and her eyes are shining, bottom lip trembling. “Sora … you understand, don’t you?” Her voice breaks, hand reaching out for the younger girl to hold.
Sora stares at her hand for a moment, disappointment settling in. This was really happening. She looks back up, and a tear falls from Iseul’s eyes. She pushes her feelings aside, forcing a weak smile as her own eyes become wet, “Unnie … You know I do.” Their hands clasp together, fingers intertwining tightly. She swallows the lump in her throat, “I want to tell you to stay. I don’t want you to leave.” The other members watch as she blinks away her tears, never one to cry in front of others. “But I know you’ve already made your mind up. You’ve already booked your train ride home, too, haven’t you?” When a sob rips out from Iseul’s chest and she nods slowly, she nods back. She stands up, pulling Iseul in for a hug, shocking the older girl.
They hold each other tightly and Sora whispers for only her to hear, “I love you, unnie.” She pulls back a moment later, glancing at the boys who are still staring in confusion. They don’t know the reason. She sighs, turning back to Iseul. “I’m going to …” She turns her head but Iseul already knows where she’s going, sniffling and nodding.
As Sora walks away, she knows there is no use to beg Iseul to stay. If she didn’t want to debut so badly, she’d go with her. But she’s always wanted to be an idol— it was her dream. She had been a trainee for far too long to just give up now because netizens didn’t like that she was a girl in a boy group.
She hesitantly stops at the bedroom door, bringing up her fist before stopping. She stands there for a moment before breathing in and out, gathering the courage to knock on the door. “Sunghoon?”
There’s no answer. She sighs.
“Please … Just hear her out,” is all she has to say before he’s ripping the door open and pulling her in. The door closes behind her and he’s staring at her, face blank. If she didn’t know him so well by now, she’d think he was angry at her. He was angry, yes, but not at her. “You don’t understand.”
“Then make me understand,” Sunghoon fires back.
“Imagine you’re in our shoes. We’re the only girls in a group full of boys, set to become idols in front of thousands of girls who already have their claws in you. You know how fans are, they think you’re theirs,” Sora says in one breath. “They see us as competition and they don’t like that.”
“We get the same reaction from guys—”
“No, you don’t,” she shakes her head, “They call us sluts. Whores. They pat you on the back and say, ‘Wow, aren’t you lucky with the ladies?’” She tilts her head, smiling a patronizing smile. “It’s always been like this. And it’s always going to be harder on us.”
She doesn’t stay for a second longer, hoping her words get into Sunghoon’s head as she leaves. Iseul is still talking to the boys as she heads to their shared room. No, her room. Only her room now.
When the door shuts behind her and she climbs into her bed, shoving her face into her pillow, she finally allows the tears to fall.
When Iseul comes into their room a few hours later, she pats Sora on the head and climbs into bed with her. They hold each other and don’t speak for a very long time.
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It’s weird without Iseul, Sora decides a few days later after Iseul has gone back home. It’s like the boys are walking on eggshells around her and she hates it. She tries to go back to normal, but it’s hard when they won’t let her.
After Niki allows her to serve his food, she stares at him for a moment, expecting him to protest, but he doesn’t. He only thanks her and begins eating. She waits another second, before turning away. Her eyes connect with Heeseung’s and she bites her lip, forcing herself to look away. Jay is now staring at her and she blinks.
A warm feeling washes over her body and she turns her head abruptly. She knows if she looked in the mirror right now, her cheeks would be red. She hates this feeling. She hates feeling vulnerable, like he can just tell what she’s thinking with just one look. She wishes he didn’t pay her so much attention. Then maybe it would be easier to get over him.
Sora sits down at her spot at the table after Heeseung hands her her plate as the boys engage in conversation, allowing her to eat her food silently. She hates herself. It’s a bold statement, but she does. All the things netizens are saying about her, that she’s a slut— that she likes one of the boys, or worse, even all of them. That she paid her way into debuting, either by actual money or other … favors. She’s just proving all of them right.
When she first read the comments about her, after the final episode of I-LAND aired, she was appalled. She felt sick to her stomach. How could anyone assume that of her? How could anyone say something like that to anyone? She doesn’t know how many times she’s cried herself to sleep or gotten so sick that she threw up nothing.
She knew the expectations of an idol, she’d been one for a year when she was thirteen with I.O.I. But that was nothing like this.
“Sora?”
Her head snaps up, eyes widening as she looks around the table. All seven of them are staring at her. She hopes she didn’t miss anything too important. She puts down her utensils, realizing she hadn’t even been eating. Just playing with her food.
Sora clears her throat, “Yeah?”
“Are you not hungry?” Jake switches to English, glancing down at her plate. “You should eat.”
“Ah …” She looks at it, too. She’s sheepish as she looks up, “Yeah. I had a big breakfast.” Everyone knows that’s a lie. But she doesn’t allow any room for argument as she stands up, “I’m going to put it in the fridge and I’ll clean dishes once all of you are done. Anyone want anything?” She almost expects one of them, Heeseung, most likely, to protest and tell her to go lay down, but they don’t. She bites down on her bottom lip, slightly ducking her head so her hair will hide her face. “Okay,” she says quietly, quickly taking her plate and walking into the kitchen.
Sora doesn’t know why she’s so disappointed. She hates being taken care of. She’s used to being the one to take care of others. She shouldn’t feel this way. She shouldn’t feel any of this.
Her phone rings in her jacket pocket right as she finishes putting her plate in the fridge. She checks the contact name.
Dad.
Sora blinks. And then stares at it some more. She allows it to continue ringing, staring at the screen until she hears footsteps heading her way. She quickly silences it, shoving it back in her pocket and leaving the kitchen just as Sunoo comes in. She doesn’t make eye contact, making sure to not brush against him as she leaves.
She can feel their eyes on her as she leaves. She wishes someone would say something.
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LITTLE BIG BRO: Noona, are you having fun?
LITTLE BIG BRO: I miss you.
Sora hates feelings, she decides. She’s staring at the text messages from Kangmin, her oldest younger brother. His contact photo stares back. She goes to type something back, but she doesn’t know what to say. Does she lie? Say she’s having fun? Say she misses him, too?
If she said she misses him, would that be a lie, too?
Guilt creeps in at the thought and she hates herself more for even thinking it. Of course, she misses her brothers. They were always around, always messing with her and begging for her attention every second.
Sora turns her phone off, throwing it on what used to be Iseul’s bed. She shoves her head under her pillow, wanting to scream. There’s a knock on the door and then— “Sora? Can I come in?”
She bolts up in her bed, eyes automatically heading to the mirror in the room. Her hair is a mess, her cheeks are puffy, and her lips are dry. She quickly combs her fingers through her hair, searching for her lipbalm and smoothing it over her lips. She clears her throat as Jay knocks again, “Yeah, oppa. Come in.”
Jay steps inside the room, eyes roaming around as if he hasn’t seen it a hundred times before. But now it’s different, she tells herself. One half of the room is gone now. Empty. Before she can dive into her self-deprecating thoughts once more, she pats the bed beside her, “What’s up?”
Jay complies, staring down at his lap for a second. He had practiced this for a while before he even left his own room, but now that he was here, it was like all of it left his mind. He sighs, looking up at Sora who looked at him in confusion, “Do you want to talk?”
Sora blinks. “Talk? About what?” She knew what he was talking about and he knew that she knew. But he indulged her, anyway. He always would.
“Iseul noona,” Jay says gently, hand twitching by his side as if he were about to hold her hand. “You didn’t stay.”
“I went to talk to Sunghoon-oppa,” she murmurs, rubbing her palm on her sweatpants. “He needed to understand.”
“And he does, now,” he says. “I …” He sighs, “You’re not like yourself, Sora. Are you uncomfortable around us without noona here?”
Sora blinks in shock, head snapping up to look at him, “What? No! I’ve been friends with some of you before unnie and I even met. If anything,” her voice grows stronger, “It’s you guys who haven’t been yourselves. You’re uncomfortable with me.”
Jay doesn’t know how she can come to that conclusion. “What? No, we love you.”
Her heart warms at the confession, but she forces it down, “You guys keep just … letting me walk all over you! Letting me do whatever, walking around me like I’m about to break. I hate it. I hate it so much.”
Jay blinks. And opens his mouth before hesitating. He closes his mouth. “What … I thought you liked doing all that? We all did. That’s why we’re not stopping you like we usually do. We thought it’d make you feel better.”
Sora swallows, suddenly realizing what she had confessed after hearing his words. She looks down to her blanket, playing with the end of it.
“Sora,” he sighs at her silence. “It’s okay to want to be taken care of sometimes. You know I’m— we’re,” he clears his throat, “—always here for you. No matter what.” His eyes focus, becoming a little stern, “Okay?”
She looks up, studying the look in his eyes. She doesn’t recognize it. She wants to change the subject. “Okay.” She still doesn’t fully believe his words and he can tell.
Jay abruptly cups her cheek with his hand and her eyes widened, cheeks flushing red. His hand is warm, fingers slightly rough as his thumb smooths over her cheekbone. “Sora. Listen to me. If you need anything, if you want to talk about anything, you can come to me. You don’t always have to do things yourself. It’s okay to ask for help. You will never need to do anything by yourself when you have us.”
Her heart is beating erratically and she’s pretty sure Jay can hear it, he’s so close to her. God, that’s so embarrassing. Her eyes nervously dart away from his, laughing nervously at his words, “Ah, alright, alright. I get it, oppa. I understand now.” She pauses for a moment, before asking, “Does this mean you guys will go back to normal now? I … I miss the way it was.” Her voice grew quieter with the last sentence.
Jay chuckles, “Yeah, I’ll tell them.”
“But don’t tell them I said any of that,” she points her finger at him, trying to gain the upperhand again. She straightens up, and his hand falls from her cheek. She tries not to seem disappointed.
Jay’s smile is endearing, teasing but gentle, “Whatever you want … Baby.” His smile grows larger at her reaction, not expecting him to use the petname as it came out of Heeseung or Jake’s mouths more. Her eyes widen comically with appalled rage in them, mouth dropping open. Her cheeks are still red, hair a little messed up but she’s still pretty as the first time he saw her in the halls of BigHit.
“Yah! Don’t call me baby. I’m not a baby, you’re a baby, baby.”
“Whatever you say, baby.”
NEXT.
228 notes · View notes
legendoftherisingtide · 6 months
Text
[intro]
Bakugou is a prideful, arrogant person. He holds himself to the highest standard; he is the best and everyone else is simply below him. Everything he has ever done was in pursuit of being number one, shining above the rest. He has to have a perfect victory, he has to be a perfect student, he has to win to save.
He pushes and pushes and won’t let anyone see his weaknesses or his insecurities. He can never lose, he can never fail, he can never show that he regrets or hesitates or that he hasn’t thought everything through. He must never be vulnerable in every sense of the word.
Then why is he standing in the rain.
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To apologize shouldn’t be a sacrifice, but it is for Bakugou. To pour his feelings, to admit his wrong, to let down all of the walls he has built and be vulnerable. And in front of his whole class.
He is willing to sacrifice his pride, to fully sacrifice any superiority he could have, to bare his soul and even risk rejection. Because he knows Midoriya is more important. Because he wants him to come home, he wants him to know his true feelings, because he wants things to change. 
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Because Midoriya has changed him. Midoriya has opened his eyes; by showing him he’s allowed to be open, that his feelings should be expressed, that he has so much to learn, and so much of that was learned through Midoriya just existing.
He isn’t sacrificing his safety frivolously because he’s expected to as a hero; he is doing it because he has grown. He is doing it because he has finally admitted to himself that he wants Midoriya to be with him and safe.
So I will sacrifice this for you. Not because it will change anything, as much as I want that I know that I can’t just fix all the wrong with just this. And I am willing to do as much as it takes to earn your forgiveness. But I don’t need that from you, not now and not ever if you don’t want that, I just need you to rest. I did so much wrong. And I am sorry for everything. You don’t have to do this alone. Lean on us. You are so strong and being supported doesn’t discount that. You’ve taught me that. 
I hate the rain. But I will brave it for you. 
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He would do everything in his power, admit so many things, just to get Midoriya to take care of himself. We see him being the most vulnerable he has ever been in front of people that aren’t Midoriya. He does so much completely out of character, all in pursuit of being there for Midoriya. 
For Izuku.
He finally gets over himself and finally tells Midoriya the feelings he has felt for so long.
He lets go of this idea he is inherently better and finally acknowledges that his hatred for Midoriya has always been about his own shortcomings and insecurities. But he still wants to be better, they are still rivals. He isn’t going to sacrifice that part of him because that is just who he is; he is still going to push to number one.
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But now it’s different.
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There is verbal and vocal acceptance and respect. Before it was unspoken; their relationship had changed ever since Ground Beta. They were proper rivals, with mutual respect and care, they were actively making each other better.
But Bakugo finally verbalizes it and tells Midoriya, not only is he sorry, but he wants to actually have a proper friendship; he wants to continue to become better and earn his forgiveness. He wants them to push each other to be better, he wants to continue to fight for the top spot, he still wants to be the best.
But when did it become something else? 
When was the turning point when it started to shift from wanting to surpass Midoriya and be the best, to wanting to keep up with Midoriya and stay by his side?
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Bakugou has already sacrificed himself for Midoriya before. His body moved on its own; with no hesitation, he would save Midoriya. He has already risked his life for him. But there is a layer to it that I don’t think people talk about. 
He tells Midoriya he shouldn’t try to win this on his own. 
He disguises his concern with an insistence that he’s in it to fight for himself when he initially joins the battle. But it is to fight by Midoriya’s side and support him.
But taking the hit for Midoriya, jumping in the way isn’t just support. This is sacrifice. This is giving yourself to ensure the safety of someone. And it was second nature. 
There are two reasons and both are a sacrifice of something in the moment.
It is knowing someone is so valuable, so great, in all senses of the word, that they must be protected. Bakugou is sacrificing his body and admitting that Midoriya needs to stay alive, for personal reasons and/or for the world. He needs Midoriya to be okay, Midoriya can’t fight alone and Bakugou will do anything to make sure he will be okay. 
But the sacrifice of ideology. 
With every development, he has relinquished parts of himself. When he sacrifices himself he is not only sacrificing his body but is admitting that he can’t do this on his own; he needs Midoriya too. This isn’t him wanting to be better than Midoriya, it’s him wanting to do it together.
Midoriya changed him.
He doesn’t die for Midoriya. He wakes up and just as his last thought was Midoriya, so was his first as he woke up. He runs to his side. People are dragging him back, trying to have him rest, knowing before he even said anything that he would lose his mind over Midoriya’s situation. 
Everyone sees how Bakugou feels about Midoriya.
He sacrifices himself because Midoriya can not die on him. Midoriya has to stay alive. Midoriya has to keep fighting. 
There can not be a world that doesn’t have him in it.
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This is the culmination of what has been developing ever since the final exam where Bakugou finally works with Midoriya; the day that win to save, save to win was noticed. Then furthered after Ground Beta where they finally talked to each other and something changed within them both.
But the final sacrifice is the culmination of Bakugou’s character.
He knows what this decision will mean. Everyone screams for him not to. He knows that he is going to die. He knows he will not win this fight.
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This isn’t dying for the cause. This isn’t just a hero complex. This is because he can help Midoriya and he will. This is for Izuku.
I will sacrifice myself for you. To give you more time, to give you even the slightest chance of winning. I will sacrifice myself for you because you are who can win. I am going to die. I am going to die and in my final thoughts, I will ask if I will still be able to be by your side.
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It is no longer can I beat you. It is no longer can I surpass you. It is can I still catch up to you. It is can I still even be equal to you. He has already sacrificed the idea that he could beat Midoriya, that isn’t what he wants anymore. What he wants is to stay here with him.
I will sacrifice everything I am. I have wanted to be the best. All my life I have wanted to surpass you and everyone around me. But you. I will let that go for you. I let it go in my mind for so long now and I have never wanted to admit it. Is it even possible? Is it even possible for me to catch up to you? Is it even possible for me to stay by your side. I can’t be that anymore. I am sacrificing even that now. I will never be number one now. I will never become the person I always dreamed to be. I will never surpass you. I am forever sacrificing that now. I will die here.  
But can I still be with you?
The sacrifice of his life is him fully relinquishing everything he is, admitting that he can’t keep up, losing all of the progress he has made, letting go of everything that made up his character.
And the last thing on his mind is if he can still be able to be by Midoriya’s side.
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He won’t let him go again. 
356 notes · View notes
moonlesslights · 1 year
Text
Red thoughts (Sanemi x f!Reader)
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Summary: After being kept apart from the Wind Hashira by your master, a mission suddenly brings the two of you together into a heartwarming path with dangerous twists in between that end up putting a bulge in Sanemi’s pants.
Warnings: Smut with plot. This is somewhat long but i’m really in love with this man so I also needed some fluff here. Minor character death and choking kink.
(If there’s something more you consider should be in Warnings, please let me know!)
A/N: I hope you enjoy this, because I truly enjoyed writing it. A lot of fun, love and smut with a happy ending, so don’t worry. Love y’all!
...
“So you’re the little flame.” The Wind Hashira grins at you, mockery dancing on his eyes. 
His white hair stands out against his pale skin full of scars that cross his face from side to side. A tug on one of the corners of your lips occurs when you are now able to observe that classic extravagance in each of the Hashira.
“Is a pleasure to finally meet you, sir.” You bow, slowly, and his smile disappears at the sight, drawing you to your full height again with the doubt that you've done something wrong.
You frown at his irritated gaze, glancing quickly at your own clothes for anything that didn't look entirely presentable. But you just can’t find a single stained o wrikled spot on your kimono, and the anger on his face is starting to freak you out. Was this what Kyojuro meant with his warnings about this man all this time?
"Has anyone told you how weird it is to introduce yourself to someone after spending a week in the same place as that person?" His voice now carries a hint of bitterness and irony that makes your stomach sink. "I've seen you loitering around the compound for six days and I think I'm the only Hashira who doesn't know your name."
Your eyes widen in surprise before you can do anything about it. He had seen you? For six days? Your mouth opens only to close again without having managed to bring a single word of excuse to the tip of your tongue. Gods, how disrespectful has it been to have overlooked him all this time? Now you have to feel your face heat up at the thought: How much have I ignored his presence that I've only seen him for two days?
His large eyes continue to examine you, piercing through every layer of courage it took you to even appear in his domain. Your heart is already beating faster than you would like, and each blow to the chest makes you lose more and more composure in the face of his insistent, too insistent gaze.
But it's not your fault! It's not fair that any opportunity to have a healthy friendship relationship with him slipped away before you could even notice because of someone else, because of...
 “I was looking foward to talk to you for some days now” You rush to say, narrowing your eyes in his direction. You're not going to let the first thing the imposing man knows about you is the fear his presence seemed to exude for everyone else. “But Master Rengoku… Mhm…!” Are you going to say it?, was it right? Your lips snap shut, gods, how were you going to explain that now?
"Oh." There is no need, you realize. No more words are necessary for the Hashira in front of you to understand your reasons at once.
However, you are not sure if that knowledge makes you happy.
You shift one foot after the other, playing with your balance as you remember how many times you asked to meet Master Shinazugawa and how many times Kyojuro talked you out of it. It were his words as your superior that you respected enough to carry out his wishes...
At least until Oyakata-sama himself called for you to ask you to join the Wind Hashira on a hunting adventure that had come his way.
"I'm sorry!" You exclaim at the top of your lungs, bowing.
Sanemi frowns even deeper, but this time with confusion. His voice is next to appear:
"What are you doing?! Stop you idiot!" A weary sigh calms you enough to look back at his face. You shrug, a soft smile painted on your lips. "Whatever. Wait for me here, we'll be gone in a moment."
Your enthusiastic nod only elicits another groan from him. His figure turns around and disappears into his residence, giving you the opportunity to observe the large trees and the huge garden that surrounds the wooden house.
It looks like a quiet, comfortable home. Definitely much quiet than the place you shared with Kyojuro as his tsuguko, and with three guys a little too hyperactive.
Your eyes roam the neatly arranged room, the fine armchairs and china arrangements on fully stocked bookcases. You can't help but smile at how long such order would last in your own residence with your 4 favorite walking disasters present.
"But why can't I go too?"
"I don’t need you."
"If it's an easy one they shouldn't send a Hashira..."
"Who said it was an easy one?!"
Your attention flows into the structure, watching two tall figures walk towards you.
Sanemi is wearing his classic outfit now, instead of the training uniform, and the boy next to him, Genya, his brother, frowns at the shout the Hashira just let out.
"Idiot..." The younger of the two murmurs under a sigh, but continuing on his way next to the white-haired one.
"I don't think it will take too long." Sanemi replies, giving him a death glare. "Take care of the place while I'm gone."
"As if I ever hadn't." Genya murmurs, arms crossed.
A simple smile is drawn on your lips at the scene, attracting the dark-haired boy's gaze faster than you would have liked.
His eyes widen in surprise and his mouth falls in reflex as he turns to his brother with raised eyebrows.
"And what are you lookin at now?" Sanemi spits out, almost baring his fangs.
Genya gently shakes his head, widening his eyes even further: "Isn't she who...?"
The Hashira's huge hand shoots at his brother's head, holding it in a threatening movement for several seconds until he finishes whispering something into his ear.
A threat that, more than scaring the minor, encourages him to let out a mocking laugh and to say goodbye to both of you with a huge smile that seems to warm up the top of the ears of your companion.
...
Traveling to the northern village began as a journey nothing if not heavy.
Sanemi was not someone who was easy to strike up a conversation with, and you had to realize that sooner than later.
Monosyllables. That's the only thing you can expect for an answer. A "yes", a "no", a shrug of the shoulders or an irritated sigh; and, if the Hashira is feeling generous, maybe he'll give you an "Enough already"
Was that he was still angry about the incident with Rengoku?, or is it his nature that prevents him from trying to be the least bit nice?
Whatever the case was, it is gettin in your nerves. And maybe that’s why you get along so well with the guys and Kyojuro: they just never shut up. And neither do you. So how is this supposed to work now?
“How about we play a game?” You try now, giving him the most unstable smile he could have seen in a while.
His eyes travel to yours, slowly. He tilts his head with an almost imperceptible movement and your smile is now threatening to split your face in two.
“Mhm.” Sanemi shrugs and turns to the road again.
Your blood boils in your veins. You’re not going to be able to stand the next two and half hours of travel this way. Agh!
“Just answer me, would you?!” You snap, abruptly stopping. “I’m sorry about what happened with Master Rengoku, but I'm here now and I’m trying to make it up for both of us!, I wanted to talk to you too, I actually wanted to see your training, I WAS JUST FOLLOWING ORDERS, ASSHOLE!”
The silence after your scream cuts the air. The crow above your heads squawks between the discomfort as you feel your teeth pressed together. The wind caresses your skin, cold, and you swear this is how he would feel.
“I see something… yellow.”
It takes you a moment to restart your brain cells. One blink, two blinks. He’s standing right in front of you, not even looking in your direction; one hand on the Katana’ handle and his breath as calm as you have ever heard.
… Is he trying to play?
Your mouth feels dry. Your heart in the throat still. Of course.
“That yellow flag…”
“No.” He answers.
Both of you continue walking in silence, soft steps directed to that still far destiny.
“The curtains of that house.”
“No.”
“The dress of that girl.”
“No.”
“Haven’t we passed it already?” You ask, looking back to see if something yellow made it out of your sight.
“No.”
The shoes, those doors, the ornaments, that house, the hair of that man…
“No.”
“Agh! I don’t know. Screw it, you’re impossible…” You groan, looking at him. “What is it?”
He then turns to you, grin on his face and bright eyes of someone who just won. Well, at least he looks more happy now, it doesn’t matter if…
“The sun”
This mother…
“The sun it’s not yellow!”
“Of course it is!”
“No! Look at it now, do you see it yellow?” He frowns, glancing at you like you were crazy.
“Of course I’m not looking at it, I’m not stupid.”
That’s debatable.
“The sun is not yellow, that game wasn’t fair.”
“Everyone draws it yellow.” He shrugs, ignoring the looks of other people on the two of you.
You clench your jaw. Does he feel like he won?, let’s show him how stupid he really is.
“My turn.” You rush, looking around you. “I see something… White.”
“The clouds.”
“No.”
“The wall.”
“No.”
“If this is some kind of joke…” He looks at you as you spread an innocent smile over your face. “That doll.”
You turn your head as you actually thought about it, but then: “No.”
Ten more objects passed over his lips movements, his patience running low with every response your gave him.
“Do you give up?” You ask, leaning in his direction.
“No. Shut up.”
Another ten objects and the town it’s left behind, making him grow angrier with every step. C'mon, everything in the woods was brown and green, what the hell would be your excuse for cheating now?
“Do you give up?” You ask again, confusing his thoughts.
“Screw you.” He sentences, avoiding your gaze.
You take that as a yes.
Your smile widens and he lets out a sight, irritated.
“That.” Your hand raises and points to his head. “Your hair.”
His face… priceless. His clenching fist… threatening. He feels the anger raise up to his system as his eyes fix on the white strand falling to his face, smacking reason into him.
Nah, that should have been cheating, it wasn’t allowed, was it?, choosing something of one of the players. It wasn’t fair because… because he didn’t even thought for a second his hair was the thing you were seeing. Fuck off…
He looks at you, frowning and with his canines showing; but in the moment you burst out laughing, his walls crumble.
The joy that emanates from your throat is… lovely. He had never got the chance to hear it before, always too far from you, always too distracted. Your eyes are almost close as your smile spreads across your face, and then…
“Don’t look at me like that, neither of us can beat the other!” You let go your body to his, dropping your head on his shoulder with a soft movement. Then he learned your first love language: touch.
And it was bad, it was too bad, because he loved the touch, he craved it, but most of the time he didn’t know how to ask for it. So when someone he finds lovely takes ahead, he just can’t help it: he doesn’t want to lose it.
His hands raise to your shoulders and brings back your body against him, brute. Chest to chest, skin caressing skin, and cold wind messing his stupid white hair.
His eyes are glued to the distance in front of him, refusing you the possibility to look at his face. And maybe it was okay, because you would have got scared at how uneasy he looked, what the hell is he doing?
His brows are strongly furrowed and his arms are shaking with the idea of the mistake he just made; but he doesn’t seem to be able to lose the grip on your body.
And he just hates it, he hates it until you let out a soft happy sigh and rub your nose against the skin on his collarbones, he hates it until you let your head rest on his shoulder and your arms climb to wrap around his neck.
“This is nice.” And he doesn’t hates it anymore. 'Cause you murmur with your lips touching his skin, easing the crawl of anxiety you got every time you went on a mission.
So he lets go, lowering his arm to your waist, applying comforting pressure to your body. His head drops to your shoulders and he swears the rhythm of his heart calms as your essence surrounds him.
Another squawk echoes from the sky and his hands tighten on the fabric of your kimono.
"You know that the Demon in that town could be a Kizuki, right?"
"Mmm... Mhm" You nod.
"Genya doesn't know anything, I didn't want to worry him... He's always been affected a bit more than the others." Sanemi sighs, his cold hands giving a pleasant chill to your skin. "I'm not your master and I don't give a shit about oaths... If things get ugly, you're out, do you understand me?"
"No, wait..."
Sanemi stands back up to his full height, his arms still around you and his face inches from yours; widened pupils that don't leave your eyes for a second.
"I don't want you to play hero, all you'll do is embarrass yourself. I want you to get out of there and bring Rengoku or Tengen with you, do you understand?"
You shake your head, looking down. This is not how it is suppose to work.
"That's an order."
"Genya would never forgive me. If I came back without you, I would never forgive me... Not if this is our first mission together."
The Hashira shakes his head in amusement.
"He will. You will. It's an occupational hazard."
Your eyes go up to his, how can you fit in so well with someone you've only just met?, how can you feel it under your skin?
"I don't need you to promise me that you will..." He whispers, his lips brushing your cheek now and his lashes caressing your temple. "I need you to obey."
Your heart pounds in your chest, throwing you off balance. You have no choice but to nod.
...
The village... The village was not in the form you expected to find it.
There were no bodies on the sidewalks and no blood running down the streets. No screams or terrified people. It didn't look at all like what Oyakata-sama had described as "a village subjugated by a demon".
The only thing that seems to warn of danger is the strange atmosphere in which everyone seems to move. Pink particles that float through the entire town and begin to blur your vision just 10 minutes after your arrival.
"What is this?" You whisper, reaching your hand out in front of you trying to catch a few between your fingers.
Sanemi shakes his head next to you, tapping your wrist to stop you from doing that.
"I have no idea, but I don't think it's the best to stick around too long to find out what happens if we keep breathing this shit." A man walks in front of you, smiling a little too friendly, lowering his eyes to your entire shape. "This thing keeps them calm and happy one way or another. We need to get to the Demon before this lowers our own defenses."
After a few comments, you both agree that the best way to find the responsible for all of that was following the path to the biggest concentration of pink particles. But with every step you keep taking to the big house on the edge of the town, your head feels more and more light and your feet start to move on their own.
You two need to finish this as quickly as possible or you won’t be able to fight right.
“Let me take the front, you enter from the back. Let’s take it by surprise and cut its head off once for all.”
Sanemi smirks at your plan, nodding.
“Whatever you say, little flame.” He agrees, taking his katana. “Just try not to die before I get there to save your ass, got it?”
You smile as you see his frame disappear when he turns to the next lane, white hair floating between the darkness. He’s going to do his part, you’re sure, and you need to do yours if you want to prove everyone and yourself that you deserved to be the next Fire Hashira.
The front door creeks at your intrusion, letting you observe with apprehensiveness the first hall on sight. Your steps appear to make too much noise and your ears keep warning you on every little noise you’re aware of.
Katana on hand, it is the only thing that makes you feel ready to whatever it’s coming. That said, your movements are clumsier at every minute that passes, and the amount of concentration of pink dust in that house was crazy. You could barely see two steps ahead of you.
“C’mon, c’mon..” You mutter, rushing your steps upstairs. “Where are y…?”
“Where is your lover?”
You stop every single movement of your muscles at the voice breathing on the back of your neck. A chill runs thought your spine. Shit, you couldn’t even sense her smell by now.
“I’m sure he was with you on your way here…” She continues, starting to walk into your sight.
“Do you mean that white haired guy?” You ask, raising your katana in front of you, furrowing your brows.
“Yes!” She exalts, smiling with bright fangs. “Where is he?, did he left you? Already?”
Her pretty face shrugs in confusion, looking at you like she was really concerned about your answer. She’s tall, a lot more than you, and her dark hair seems to float around her pink dress, giving her an strange aura you have never felt before… But that could be just the amount of pink particles you had inhaled by now.
“It was about the guy you kissed months ago?, Is he jealous?” Her bright eyes give her a childish, almost innocent appearance.
You step back. How did she managed to know about that?
“You kissed him too just a couple of days ago, isn’t?!” Your eyes fly open at her statement, felling like an idiot the moment your face starts to turn red. How could you be blushing in a moment like this? “But you don’t feel the same way… Is it because this new man?”
Her voice trembles and you force yourself to look at her eyes. You feel your chest let go at the realization: She wasn’t a Kizuki. But the way tears start to build up under her eyes tells you that her explosive personality could be the real problem.
“But then why did he leave you?! Didn’t he know you want him?”
“No…” You try to calm her. Your hand tightens on your weapon, getting nervous at how every rush of emotions lets out another wave of pinky particles. “He’s not my lover, he just had things to do.”
“N-No… But you two… I was sure…” Her knees buckle, looking at you with hidden pain in her features.
“It’s okay.” You coo. As pacific as her death could, the better.
“No… No, no!” Another pink wave hits you straight on the face. “You’re lying!, or you don’t- you don’t know how he… Where is he? Where is he?!”
“I’m here.”
Both pairs of eyes fly to the the back door of the room, widening with different emotions at the white haired figure brandishing a katana on its hands.
“Yes!, he came!” She looks at you with evident excitement and you need to hide the amusement at the confusion written on Sanemi’s face. “Now I can tell you how he feels, now you can know I wasn’t wrong!”
That seems to activate something in the Hashira. Sanemi clenches his jaw, tensing up.
“Fuck this.” He whispers, rushing towards the demon with a clean movement, seeking to cut off his head in one move.
However, the smile on the girls face only gets bigger and bigger. Jumping aside, the blade misses her neck for inches.
You get on action now, taking advantage of the distraction caused with Sanemi intervention to direct your katana to her feet, hitting below her knees with almost a perfect technique. Still, your legs feel weak at the sudden movement and your fantastic success is quickly overpowered by your face crashing on the floor.
Before the demon falls, her crawls aim to Sanemi, who just in time steps back and brandish his katana so the entire hand of the girl is cut off her body.
You had seen it before, a thousand times with Rengoku: the only thing that could make a Hashira spend more than three minutes with a demon is a number on its eyes. Anything else, they would tear it apart.
The demon in front of you… She wouldn’t stand a chance.
And she appears to knows it, too early, too easy.
Sanemi’s blade doesn’t stop for a second, it redirects to her neck, letting the flesh slide through the metal, dropping an amused head to the ground with a soft thud.
Her body stays still on the air, frozen in time, just a few centimeters above the wooden floor; still connected to the Demon emotions.
A prostitute, you realize.
She was a prostitute, a girl too innocent for that kind of job. A girl without family, without friends, just her and business. A girl who dreamed of another life, a beautiful life, with a house, a dog and a man who loved her above anything else. She spent her last minutes as human believing she would find true love with one of those men she had in her bed.
And on her last night, she did. She fell in love. But the beast there saw another kind of potential for her, another job. So she took his blood and never got tired of it.
He never loved me…
“Flame, step back!”
Between those sheets, I never found love…
“Master!”
“But you…” She raises her gaze, smiling so pure that your heart drops at the sight. “You are going to find it. It’s really here…”
Her body twitches on the air and her skin starts to break on even more pink cracks that threaten to split at any given moment.
“I’m so happy for you two… I’m happy now.”
“Get down!”
Sanemi’s voice is the last thing you hear before her whole body exploits into uncountable waves of red particles, washing over you with so much strength that your own body is thrown to the nearest wall.
“Master?” Your voice is barely a whisper and yet, your throat aches at the minimal effort.
Your lungs tighten every time you breathe and your legs feel weak, too weak. Moving out of the room can’t even be in your plans right now.
Everything you see is just red.
“You stupid idiot, where are you?”
It is Sanemi. His voice is what brings you back now, again. His steps seem to be still far from you, but you can tell he’s getting closer.
The red dust has almost disappeared by now, only a few particles remain floating around you and your hair. What a disaster…
“I’m still here, Master.” You answer, trying your best to get on your feet again.
“Yeah, no shit.” His mad voice echoes trough the walls before his tall frame appears crossing the back door once again, too. “Lucky you…”
“Lucky me?, I have no idea how much of that red shit I just inhaled…” You frow, raising your face to meet his a few feet from you. Yet, the one thing that catch your eye is the enormous hole on the room’s window. Oh… “Lucky me, I guess”
He huffs at your realization, taking a few steps ahead, watching for himself from how high he had fell. A new record, it seems.
“Are you hurt?” You ask, shaking off some more dust from your clothes. He doesn’t respond, still looking through the window. “What is this shit anyways?”
You start to walk closer to him, muttering some more questions under your breath. Nothing really important as you try to convince yourself that the Wind Hashira is tough enough to take that fall, that he would be okay, that Shinobu would make sure of that.
By the way, you need to send a crow as soon as possible so they can know about Sanemi’s state…
“Stop”
Eh?
The Hashira’s hand is raised up to your chest, indicating you for don’t keeping getting any closer to him.
“What?”
“Stop. Just fucking stop” His voice cracks at the last word, turning on all your alerts.
“Sanemi?, are you felling unwell? Does something hurt?” Your hand reaches out for his shoulder and you take it back almost immediately.
He was burning…
“Sanemi?, are you…?”
“Get away from me. Now.”
His voice is harsh and doesn’t leave space for questions. You had only heard him using it on another slayers, leaving them with wreaked knees and whole body trembles.
Still, seeing the way his eyes shut close, almost painfully, you just couldn’t seem to obey this order.
“Why?, what do you feel?” You coo, leaning closer to him.
His response comes with another tremble.
“I’m hot. I feel like I’m burning alive…”
Your heart sinks, drowning in impotence when you don’t find anything you can do immediately to take that pain away from him.
“It’s okay, I’ll send a letter to Shinobu right now, I’m sure she will know what to do.” You try, taking him from both shoulders.
“No. You go…” He shakes his head, getting your hands off of him. “I want you out of this room.”
“No, what are you talking about?, I’m not leaving you.” You reach for him again. “Come on now, can you walk?”
You raise his arm on your own, trying to lock it over your shoulders to help him move, but his head starts to shake in denial the moment you step closer, struggling with each other.
“No. No, it’s okay…”
“Let me help you…”
“No, leave me.”
“C'mon now, just let me…”
“I told you to stop!”
The next thing you feel is your ass crashing down the floor, hard. His movements were too sudden and his strength too much for you. You need to look up to him to realize how far he had just pushed you.
However, any hints of anger wash away when you focus on his face:
White salty hair sticked to his even more pale skin, unmatched breath and open eyes with extremely widened pupils.
Oh.. and a bulge between his legs.
It hits you.
Hard.
That’s what that red dust was: an aphrodisiac. A powerful one for what you could see. You feel stupid for have just realized what you had let Sanemi gotten in to. He probably was in an even moren affected state since the beginning.
You start to remember your way to this house, how the men seem to be in an perpetual infatuation’ state. Even the Wind Hashira looked approachable under that pink dust. You bet women loved how easy was to deal with men under that spell.
Gods, you and Shinobu should start a new project right away…
“Out.” Sanemi orders, avoiding to look in your direction. You open your mouth just in time to be interrupted again: “Get out before I do something we will both regret tomorrow.”
You begin to shake your head as soon as his words hit you in the throat. His pain is evident, his face is red and his fists clench around nothing, digging his nails to his own flesh, so hard that you fear it’ll start bleeding.
Did he plan on you leaving him like that?
“Look at me…” You ask. “Look at me, Sanemi.” The way his eyes lift at the mention of his name dropping of your lips gets you walking to him in no time. “If I get out of here now I won’t be able to come back for at least three hours, you sure you can hold on until that?, you sure you won’t do something mad out of desperation before that?”
“If you do not leave this room right now I’m sure I will do something mad.” His eyes have turned bestial and his knuckles are white, clenching now so hard on the window frame you’re sure he will break the wood under his fingers soon.
Your heart pounds on your chest and your brain is working at full speed. You should go, you should start running as soon as possible and bring help here, but again, how long would that take?, how much suffering he would have to bear when you…?
“Fuck!” The pain that exudes his voice is the breaking point for you when you watch him fold on his stomach, bracing himself like he would die right there.
“Would you really regret it?!” You exclaim, looking down to his widened pupils.
He shakes his head, unsure.
“I don’t want to mess up whatever is going between you and Rengoku” He admits, frowning.
“What?, what are you talking about?, there’s nothing going with me and Kyojuro.”
He starts to try to stand straight again, still clenching to his stomach. You do your best to help him, letting him use your shoulder as a support and then getting your hands under his, so your arms avoid him to come down again.
Still, he lets out a desperate groan when your chest and his own rub through the movements and his hot skin touches your cold.
“That witch said you kissed a guy, right?, wasn’t it Rengoku?” His head drops to your shoulder. Hot breath running chills against your sensitive skin.
You nod, letting Sanemi's essence surround you.
“And she also said I didn’t feel the same… Remember?” That was the first time you admitted that out loud. “So tell me now if you will regret it so much so I can go out and bring help…”
“I would kill for having you in my arms the whole night, flame.” His lips brush against your neck, igniting your hear in only one sentence. “But if we do this, if we do this right now..” he lets you feel again the bulge pressing against your lower stomach. “I’m not letting you go back to him. This won’t be a one night stand, flame. I’m keeping you… so you tell me if it won’t be you the one who regrets it tomorrow.”
You smile, felling his head moving out of the crock of your neck to look at you directly on the face.
You get on your tip toes, pushing both of the tips of your noses together. His lips brush against yours and you start to wonder if that red dust didn’t affect you too. But with the growing tension, the only thing you can do is closing your eyes and crave for him to close the space that still remained between your bodies.
“I need words, little flame.” He grins, and when you open your eyes you swear you haven’t seen such a beautiful man in your entire life.
“I won’t regret it.” You smile, sure, running your fingers through his white strands, trying to make him certain of your decision. “Let’s do this.”
“You won’t run away?”
“Where else could I be, idiot?”
The way his lips crash against yours lets you feel how much pain was still running trough his system. The way his hands clench to your hips, forcing your body to curve into his, lets you feel how much desire he is holding on.
Your legs wrap around his waist when he lifts you from the floor. You can feel that he’s moving, but his hot lips dancing against yours, letting his wet tongue explore your mouth, avoid you to acknowledge anything else.
His neck then curves to lower his head, placing soft wet kisses to your sensitive skin from your jaw to your collarbones. Your mouth falls open, letting out a low gasp at the way his huge hands start to browse your body. You feel him everywhere.
Still, it is how his teeth crave into your skin what brings you back to what was really happening. No matter how much you would have wished this to occur under different circumstances, you can’t let the joy of the moment distracts you for what you need to do right here, right now, this time.
You drop from Sanemi’s embrace and plant your feet on the floor again. His confused face doesn’t last long after your hands push his chest and force his body to fall onto the bed of the room he had brought you two to.
“What are you…? Oh, fuuuuck.” Your tongue tracing the fine line of hair from his pelvis to his navel makes him arch his back with a loud groan falling from his clenched teeth.
Your hands travel around his exposed torso before you push your body up, straddling his hips with your legs. He takes you by the neck and pulls you into a kiss, devouring your mouth as you roll down your hips, applying friction on his crotch. The hardness in his pants rubs against your clit just right and you let a moan fall from your mouth, making him groan.
“Fuck, please, Flame…”
The desperation in his voice takes you by surprise when he takes by the waist and applies pressure down on him, forcing you to feel how bad he needed you.
You leave one last kiss on his jaw before kneeling down, looking at him when your fingers pull at the edge of his pants. Sweaty white locks glued to his forehead and a slight brush of pink across his cheeks and nose gives you every answer your needed. You pull down the fabric and he finishes to toss it off his feet, freeing his cock in front of you.
Well, his idiocy is definitely not the only big thing about him. Shit, is that really going to fit inside you?
You take him with one hand, giving it a few strokes, unsure. You are a virgin after all, you are not quite confident that you are doing it right. You move your hand up and down, applying pressure and registering Sanemi’s reactions; and when you pass your thumb across the tip and he throws his head back, you know you did something right.
“Just like that…” The white haired murmurs, supporting his weight on his elbows, closing his eyes, enjoying the soft caresses of your little hands of him, not sure if it was the red dust what was making his body feel surrounded in flames or  just how much he had dreamed about this from the first time he saw you...
God, this shit is getting on his brain, he needs to make sure it doesn’t get to his tongue.
Tongue...
“Fuck-... Flame!” His hand tugs at your hair as the wet contact of your mouth wraps around him. 
His eyes dart to look at you between his legs, your lips just a few millimeters from the tip and dove eyes looking in his direction. His breathing gets stuck in his throat and suddenly, Sanemi feels guilt pounding in his chest.
“Did I do it wrong?” You ask just above your breath and he swears he could die right there and now. 
“No, no... It’s just... We should change positions, c’mon, I want to make you feel good too...” He starts shifting his body before you press a hand on his chest again, shaking your head. 
“No, Sanemi...” You climb up to him without letting go of his cock, also raising your free hand to his shoulder. “Tonight is about helping you, besides...” You press your lips to his ear as you whisper: “You’ll make me feel good in a bit too.”
And you swear you can feel him throb in your hand. 
His eyes are glued to you as you lower down to your knees again. You let your tongue fall out your mouth, pressing along all his long shape before wraping your lips at the top and taking his balls and the bottom with your hand. 
The first few moves you try are just testing, because you can't get him deep enough before you gag. So when his hands tangles on your hair again but instead of pushing you away bring you closer to him, you know you’re fucked. 
“Relax your throat and stick your tongue out... Yes, like that.” His hand starts pushing you down and you feel your eyes getting watery as his tip hits the deep of your throat. “Juuuust like that. Good girl.”
You take a deep breath when he goes all the way back again and, before you know, he’s pushing into you with a new found rhythm. Your hands grasp at his hips, trying to mantain a little control over your body as brutal groans scape from his lips and the thrusting becomes even more erratic. 
You gag one more time and look at him with those lust-filled eyes and he truly believes he has never seen anything hotter. His hips stutter and he lets out a soft moan after a deep groan when he pulls you out just in time, ‘cause not even understanding what was going on, you followed his movements and now your pretty face was splattered in cum. 
He was wrong, there was something even hotter. 
“Shit, I’m sorry.” He’s not. Do not believe him. 
You smile and grab your kimono’s sleeve to wipe it off only for him to pull at your wrist and stop you. You open your eyes big and look at him closing the distance between your bodies. His thumb comes at your face and colects the cum with a couple of movements. 
“Open.” He orders, tapping your lower lip with his knuckles. 
You obey him, letting your jaw fall down just enough so he could push in his thumb, letting you taste him as he pressed down your tongue with malice. A grin appears on his face as your lips close around his finger. 
“Stop being so goddamn sinful, little flame.” 
A genuine smile breaks your act. You got caught. He pulls away and you let out a soft laugh, looking at him with bright eyes. God, how could this feel so right?
 “How are you feeling?” You ask, soon enough your features are full of concern again and he hates the sight of it. 
His big hands grab at your waist and pull you up to his lap, wraping his arms around you. You blink with curiosity at him when he frowns and press his index right between your brows. 
“Don’t do that, you’ll get wrinkles.”
You let out a loud laugh before pressing your own index on his forehead too. “But you are doing the same, idiot.” He looks up and huffs, letting his hand fall again to your hips. “Besides, smiling also creates wrinkles, here...” You touch both side of his eyes.
“Those I don’t care.” He complains, narrowing his eyes. 
“How are you feeling?” You ask again, preoccupied that the pain from the begginind hadn’t stopped. 
“Better. I can stop here, I feel good enough to wait for Shinobu if that’s what you’re asking, Flame.” Sanemi’s lips are now brushing agaisnt yours with every word his lips drop. “But I don’t want to. So tell me if I need to stop right now, we’ll do whatever feels okay with you.”
Your red face is the only thing that doesn’t feel okay. For fuck’s sake... C’mon!, what happened to all your confidence? No, why did you have to sit there?!
“Did you listen, little flame?, it’s okay if you want to stop here.” 
You shake you head at his suggestion, looking down. He tries to tilt your head up with his fingers but you refuse it, bitting your lip before your are able to speak.
“... This feels okay.” You whisper, rocking down your hips with his hard cock. His hands tighten on your skin and you are still wondering if he knew how wet you got of feeling him growing underneath you all this time. 
“Fine.” Is the only thing he says before he turns you around and drops your back against the mattress.
Sanemi undresses you quickly, big scratchy hands that run over your body without any shame. Your kimono slips off your shoulders when your breasts are exposed. Sanemi is fully hard again and... He was lying to you. He wasn't okay, every second tested his ability to keep his hands to himself, every time you touched him he ignited, just how much pain was he willing to take if you believed him?
His eyes follow each of your agitated breaths and you now know perfectly well that the red dust is still running through his entire system. His lips wrap around your right nipple while two of his fingers pinch the left one, creating electrical currents down your body. You let out a gasp, feeling his tongue dancing on your skin, but not satisfied with that, he presses his teeth down your nipple, not letting go until you whimper under him, and with that, he crawls to your lips again, demanding for his tongue to be taken into your mouth.
“Sanemi…” You whisper, cupping his face between your hands.
As he works with your lower lip, one of his hands loosens the skirt of your kimono and takes it down your legs, letting you push it off your feet to the floor. His fingers then trace down your leg up to your inner thighs, pressing his thumb slowly on your bundle of nerves and forcing a moan out of you straight to his lips.
“Let me prepare you, little flame.” He says, pleas, as his digit works on you, making your squirm under him.
“Mhm..!, Sanemi, no…”
“Shhh, it’s okay. I’m gonna take care of you.”
Your panties finally come off and you are, now, completely exposed to him. He accommodates you on top of a pillow, letting your head rest as he backs up a bit, only enough to watch your entire body, dark pupils all over it, red cheeks calling for another thing but just lust.
“You’re so, so beautiful, flame.” He grins, hidden thoughts under his tongue. “I’m scared to stain you…”
“Sanemi-”
“Am I even worth to it, love?” The sudden pet name takes you by surprise, letting you silenced for his next sentence: “I don’t think I have ever hold something so precious, I-”
“I want it to be you, Sanemi.” You interrupt him, smiling. “I’m starting to suspect Oyakata-sama knew what he was doing putting the two of us in this mission.”
He lets go of a simple laugh, warming your heart. “Do you really think so?”
You nod, cupping his pale face between your hands to peck his lips three times. His hand rests above one of yours, bringing you closer to him, enjoying your essence surrounding him.
“Thank you.” He whispers.
You try to look at his face to talk him out of “thanking you” but you’re suddenly pushed back into the mattress, covered by his whole body.
“Now let’s do this right, shall we?”
“Sane- Oh, fuck!” His fingers start to play on your clit without a warning, pressing down on your skin, almost making spread your legs with no other thought in your head.
His pace is savage, delicious, bringing you closer to the edge only for him to stop, delighting himself with the way you squirm under him, noting how he was the first man to make you feel this way.
Soon, one of his fingers looks for your entrance, moving cautiously until he finds it, then, he curves.
“Mhmmm…!”
“Yes, right there, love, isn’t it?” He gives you a sided smile, taking a much faster rhythm and adding a second finger a moment later, opening you for him. “I’m gonna need you to tell me if something doesn’t feel right when I put it in, okay?”
You nod, biting down your lip. His words were like an echo comparing to the felling overflowing all of your senses. However, instead of positioning right, your master continued with his finger inside of you, pulsing every time harder and harder.
“Sanemi… It’s okay, I can ~ah~ do it now…”
He shakes his head. His pupils almost take the entirety of his eyes by now, looking down at you when he says:
“I need you as relaxed as possible. I don’t want to hurt you, Flame… So I need to take one out of you first.”
His left hand comes down on your throat, deliciously squeezing, as a third finger joins the pair inside of you and his thumb takes over your clit. It soon becomes too much to bear and you can’t say no more than “yes” every time a new motion brings closer and closer to your ecstasy.
And it comes sooner than expected: crashing, destructive all over your body, making you grip fiercely to Sanemi’s arms, arching your back on senseless movements.
“That’s right, little flame.” His praising words drawn another moan from you, taking you back from your orgasm sweet and gentle. Two words you couldn’t believe, described the Wind Hashira. “Do you feel good now?”
You nod, closed eyes and sloppy smile.
“Yeah.” You grant. He steals another kiss and looks at you in the eyes. “Come here, Sanemi…”
As you share a deeper kiss he finally positions between your legs, still playing softly with your clit, and pressing the tip into your entrance. You gasp to his mouth and his tongue takes the chance to come down in you, letting you taste the salt and forest in him.
Sanemi starts to slide in, bruising grip on your hips when he groans, murmuring under his breath “you’re tight…”. The sting that comes along alerts your senses, but the feeling clouds them again. The pain and the pleasure had never been in such a close line before.
“I’m… Oh, god- I’m gonna start moving now, okay?” His head is beside yours and his breathing sends shivers down your spine.
You lift your legs, interlacing them around his waist when you nod.
Slowly, he exits you only half of his shaft, and pushes in again. Both of you gasp at the feeling. Your nails look for his skin one more time, burying themselves and leaving furious red marks on him as he repeats this movement enough times for you to accustom his size.
That was seven minutes ago.
Now that you have given him green flag to start moving as he wished so, now he was on his knees and your hips lifted up to him, with both of his hands holding you up by the waist as he thrusted into you in what it seemed an unstoppable pace.
Your moans were loud, specially since, on a particularly hard thrust that made you clench on him, Sanemi had growled and bitted down your shoulder, hurting the skin but sending you on another uncontrollable orgasm.
You don’t think you can take one more.
“Don’t close your eyes, flame. Look at me.” He takes by the chin, forcing you to lock gazes with him. He grins and you can feel him starting to squeeze on your throat again. “Mhm! Fuck, you like that, don’t you?, I know you like it because you squeeze me down here… and you moan, shit, you moan so sweet, little flame.”
“Sanemi…” You whimper, arching your back and pressing your fingers on his biceps, giving him exactly what he needed.
“I’m gonna cum, love. Oh- I’m gonna…”
“Inside.” You bring your arms around his neck when your back finally meets the mattress again and his body comes closer to yours.
“I-I can’t, flame. We can’t.”
He’s not lying. He might be dying to impregnate you and get his seed deep into you, hell, he can get completely turned on only with the thought of fucking a baby into your tummy, but…
You shake your head, pleasure clouding your reasonable brain when your legs find their own way to lock behind Sanemi, mumbling one more time “inside”
Well, fuck it.
The white haired resumes his brutal thrusts, continuing brushing your clit with the thumb of his right hand and pressing down your throat with his left.
He edges you for some more minutes, keeping you moaning into his ear and screaming his name as he wished so; but finally, his hips start to lose control and the big dom man above you soon turns into a mess of grunts and low whimpers almost asking you to make him cum.
“Oh, please, please, pleaseeeee… Fuck!, Ah! Fuck… So-so good.”
You wished you could have laugh at the moans of your master, but you weren’t in an exactly better state right now. If worst, you could barely speak and your legs were trembling intensely with your tummy still having spasms every three seconds, bringing another gasp out of you.
Sanemi moved out of you and to your side like a big cat that had been just fed and was ready to take a deserved nap.
“Are you okay?, how are you feeling?” His arm comes under your body, bringing you closer to him.
“I’m okay, how are you feeling?” You repeat, concern still hidden in your voice. Was he still in pain?
“I’ll survive.” He smiles, tilting his head, but the answer doesn’t sit right on you and he can almost immediately tell. “I’m okay now, Flame. I swear. Believe, if a need another little dosis of help, I’ll let you know.”
This time it’s you who breaks into a smile, smacking his chest playfully while you shake your head. At the action, he throws his head back, laughing with his eyes closed. He had never felt this happy before, he didn’t remember how good it felt. To love. To be loved.
It is really here.
And you have never seen such a beautiful thing before. If you could burn into your pupils a permanent image for the rest of your life, this would be it.
To want to hold something forever.
“Sleep, little flame, we have a big journey tomorrow.”
You are already yawning as he speaks, nodding and not even protesting at his words. Your legs were jelly, your vocal cords sore and the tiredness of the fight was finally catching up to you.
“Mhm-mhm, good night, Sanemi.”
He grins, placing the covers on top of both you.
“Good night, love.”
His lips pressed on your forehead are the last thing you feel before finally surrendering to your heavy eyelids, but you can still swear you hear the soft and lovely laugh of that little demon somewhere out there.
She’s glad you’re happy.
You’re glad she’s finally in a place where she can be too.
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raffe156 · 1 year
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Spoils of War
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Pairing: John Price x f!reader (Tank) OC
Warnings: Smut/nsfw, 18+, unprotected sex, mentions of violence, Possessive Price, Dom!Price, rough sex, age gap in my head Price is 41, fluff at the end
Summary: You make Price jealous, end of hahaha 
A/N: Thanks for so many likes and reblogs on my last post! Possessive Price has got me in a hold and I really like this MC and Price dynamic, got more ideas and wips for them :)    @yeyinde and @irnbru32​ this one's for you two!
Please as always comments and feedback welcome 
Disclaimer: I don't own any of the Call of duty characters - Only Tank
3:00am 
You glanced at the alarm clock on the small side table. You knew you needed to get up, but Price had you trapped under his arm you were tucked right into him. His soft snoring in your ear. You traced a scar on his forearm the hair had not quite grown back. The man was like a space heater, you could feel it coming off his bare chest. You were just in his T-shirt but you could feel yourself sweating. The Ac unit had broken days ago on the Los Vaqueros Base, you had asked Alejandro to fix it god knows how many times only for him to respond with “Maybe you shouldn’t be wearing so many layers querida” followed by Rudy apologising for his Captain.
You tried to turn yourself in the small cot so you could put your foot on the floor, but Price gripped you tighter to him.
“Not trying to do a smash and dash are you love?” - The sleep was thick in Prices voice. You turned your face back to him.
“Yeh your my 1am booty call John…I’ve got Ghost pencilled in for 3:30…” - You laughed, but you noticed the change in his body.
“Oh I'm joking John…I need to make sure Im at least back on my side of the base before everyone wakes up…can't be seen doing the walk of shame back from my Captain's room can I? knickers in my pocket…speaking of which can I have them back please…their on your desk” - You sat up on your elbows. Price looks over at his desk your black underwear draped over his desk lamp.
“No…Keeping them thanks…spoils of war and all that lot” - He mirrored your body sitting up on his elbows a smirk on his face.
“Spoils of war?…John you can't keep my knickers…I'll take your boonie hat then...I think I'd suit it” - You got up moving over to the desk to swipe your underwear and his beloved hat his top just covering your arse. Your weren’t fast enough he was up and already at the desk your underwear in his fist, he gave your arse a slap for good measure.
“Now now…got to be quicker than that love, even half asleep you can't beat me” - He was feeling cocky now. He eyed you up and down god did you look good in his T-shirts. He leant back against the desk you could see the outline of him in his boxers, fuck he was handsome. You slinked over wrapping your arms around his neck hugging your own elbows noses pressed together.
“It’s ok you keep them…ill ask Simon if I can have my lace ones back…” - you sighed leaving the whisper of a kiss on his cheek. You pulled away feeling pretty smug with yourself.
Why was he feeling like this? He knew you were joking, but the image of Ghost with his hand on you…you clawing at him while he’s buried deep in you. Him hearing the soft sobs as you cum saying his name…his tongue all over you…Price felt like his blood had turned to acid and it was boiling through his muscle into his bones.
“Have you seen my pants…cause your not keeping them as well…” - You looked over at Price, he looked like a storm cloud.
“what’s the matter? You know I'm joking don't you?” - you walked back over to him cupping his face. Your eyes were pleading with him. You and your big mouth. Price didn’t say a word instead he started kissing you, but it was all teeth, biting greedy, rough.
“Mhmmm….slow down John…”- You tried to pull away but he had you locked in his arms, he moved down to your neck, biting and sucking at it so it left marks. He wanted to mark you as his.
“John don’t, your going to leave marks and I'm not wearing a neck gaiter for the next few days in this heat…ahhh!” - he had bit your shoulder.
“Call me John one more time I dare you…I'm your Captain and I think you need reminding of that” You could feel him on your thigh he was hard, and you couldn’t lie it was making you wet.
“Yes Sir….Captain” - Your heart was racing.
“That’s better…on your knees” - He said pulling his cock out of his boxers, the tip already leaking, you did as you were told.
“Open your mouth…tongue out” Price could see you squirming on your knees. He was going to enjoy this he thought as he slapped his cock off your waiting tongue. You wrapped your mouth around him softly licking the underside of his head. You looked up at him as he slid further down your throat.
“That’s a good girl…” - His hand snaking up into your hair.Price growled as you took him as deep as you could, He was moving your head for you, he hit the back of your throat causing tears to well up in your eyes, he wiped them away with his thumb and pulled out leaving you drooling and gasping for breath but it was short lived as he thrust himself back down your throat and held you to his base your tongue flat to his balls. You tapped his thighs. Fuck the oxygen was leaving your brain, but you could feel how wet your were.
“Alright, easy now take a breath” - Price pulled your head back, saliva on your chin, he wanted to ruin you. You were trying to steady your breathing, you liked this game and wondered how far you could push your Captain. Price could see the look in your eye you were scheming, well he was going to put a stop to that.
“You have 5 seconds to get on the bed…or I'm using my belt on your arse”- He stepped away from you reaching for his pants to unloop the belt his cock bobbing against his stomach. You didn’t waste any time getting to your feet and crawling on to the bed where you waited for further instructions from your Captain.
“Good girl, 6 seconds, but i'll let you off this once…” - he slapped the belt together. It made you jump but the spring in your stomach said otherwise. Price grabbed your wrists slipping the belt over them pulling it tight. More marks you thought. He raised them above and over your head leading you to lie on your back arms reaching towards the top of the cot, tying the other end to the metal rail headboard. A nervous laugh escaped from your mouth. Price noticed you pull your knees up defensively. He cocked his eyebrow at you not a chance your were hiding now. He bullied his way between your thighs pushing your knees apart leaving your bare. He loved the sight of you spread out for him on display, loved the way you couldn’t help buck your hips up. Loved the way your squirmed under his gaze like it was burning you. He was right his gaze was searing into your skin causing your blood to rush and thunder in your ears. You were begging him with your eyes to brand your skin with his touch.
“Look at you…all laid out for me…or would you prefer Ghost between your legs looking at your wet cunt?” - He was smirking as he traced the inside of your thigh with his rough hand, his thumb grazing over you slit. You were feeling brave and wanted to see how far you could push your luck.
“Ghost would already be eating me out like it was his last meal” - Your grin bit at him you could see it in his eyes. Price knew you didn’t mean it you were trying to get a reaction out of him, but he couldn't help the image that formed in his mind.
“Oh I’m sure he would…in fact I know he would be, any of the men on this base would be I wouldn’t blame them either” - Price lowered his head , you could feel his breath on your sensitive skin an inch away from your throbbing cunt.
“I've seen the way they all look at you…wondering what you sound like when your moan, when your begging for it, how you would feel pressed against them tight and hot…” - Price swipes his tongue flat over your folds, flicking the tip off your clit. He takes a quick glance up at you you face is buried in the crook of your elbow, he can hear your panting the dry heat suffocating you. He’s toying with you but your answer got you what you wanted, you always got what you wanted with your Captain, his face buried in you his beard rough on your inner thighs. It was short lived just as you were wading in, Price removed his mouth and replaced it with the sting of his hand the pain spreading up your body.
“For fuck sake…” - You where reeling at the sudden shift in touch. Price gave you a cruel look as his fingers prodded into your cunt thick and heavy, curling up hitting you just right causing a choked moan to escape, his thumb pressed against your clit, rubbing tight circles. You eyes screwed shut as he applied pressure to your abdomen.
“Fuck…John, please…” - Your pleas cut short as he corrected you with another slap to your pussy.
“What did I say about calling me John?…I'm your fucking Captain…”- Price was enjoying this and he couldn’t help feel sorry for you, but you need to be taught a lesson. He sat back resting your legs over his bare thighs he loved the dirty scowl on your face. He gives you that eye crinkling smile but it's laced with smugness and you wanted to kick it off his face. Before you get a chance to kick out Price lines himself up with your centre, rolling your clit with his tip coating himself with you, it sends sparks up your spine that crackle through your nerves. He slides his T-shirt up your body exposing your hard nipples kissing in-between them, rough, nipping kisses, he sucks a bit too hard on one of them leaving a pink hue that will bloom into a dark purple love bite by the time the sunrises.
“Please…Sir…” - Your begging his cock resting at your entrance you can feel your walls clenching around nothing and your really cant help let out a little sob the frustration getting to you.
“That’s a good girl…see your….learning” - Price rammed his cock in, not giving you the time to adjust around him like he usually does. No his rhythm is heavy and powerful each one you feel him at your cervix, you arch your back while your bitten breasts bounce with every thrust. You cant even choke out a moan, the sound of his hips connecting with your arse and thighs is obscene also his swings are causing the headboard to hit the wall, someone was going to hear you.
“Think Ghost or Soap could fuck you till you couldn’t speak love?…After the other night I bet they have wanked themselves dry at the sight of your naked wet body…but i'm telling you now i'm going to make sure they know how good you get it from me…” - he growls, slamming back into you making your eyes roll back in your head. Your caged under him his arms resting either side of yours, he wants to hear you, he needs to hear you. He starts to bite at your neck, licking it his beard scratches you face. There your on the edge he's dragging your walls with every pull of his hips, its pooling in your stomach your going to snap open. You want him to snap you open.
“OH FUCK!…” - You cum, your legs shaking around him its loud, but you don't care.
“Feels to fuckin good love, your so fucking tight, want me to fill you up…” - Price can feel your walls tightening around him pushing him into his own realise.
“YEs…Plea…Fuck me…i want your cum in me Captain!” - You sob the words out, desperate. Price is drunk on the sounds your making as he fucks you rough and hard, the sounds filling the small room, he groans loudly as he cums inside you, panting your name.
He falls to the side of you his cock still twitching inside you, he presses his forehead to your temple. You both try to catch your breath. Price reached up to unbuckle the belt from your wrists, the skin scorched from the rough fabric. He made a mental note to kiss them better later.
“So does this mean I can have my knickers back?” - Your voice is wrecked and dry as you turn your face into him.
“No and dont ask again” - He chuckled lifting his head up to kiss you softly this time. Priced wrapped his arm around you tightly. You were back in the same position as when you woke up you glanced over at the alarm clock 3:35am
“Shit i'm late to meet Ghost…” - You laughed ringed around the room. Price looked at you like your were deranged a smirk creeping at his mouth.
“Really woman? Your going to be the death of me?” - He nudged you back into him, You laughed.
“No really John…I need to get up…In 10mins everyone is going to be gearing up for the brief with Laswell and I don't want to be scurrying back to my room with the best part of you running down my leg thanks” - You tried to push your way up, but he was stronger despite being nearly half asleep again.
“John…really…let me up” - You really were struggling now. Price wasn’t budging he wanted you to stay there with him in your own little bubble, because once you left this room you both had to resume your roles, him making sure you didn’t get yourself killed, you barking back at him for doubting you.
He made another mental note to ask you when this was all over out on a date, dinner and drinks, but for now he was happy like this in your little bubble.
“shhhh shhh…love just give me 5 more minutes” - He felt the lull of sleep pulling at him, his mind showing him the life you both could have together, he could hear you laughing, sing song voice as you danced around the kitchen belly round with his baby glowing and beautiful, two more running at him hands open and sticky. He wanted that and he was going to do everything he could to get it.
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jess-the-vampire · 1 year
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I genuinely don't understand the gripes a few people have with how Belos was handled in the finale. "Dont just brush him off as being evil" Well, why the fuck not? Dude wasnt born evil but he purposefully chose destruction and death at every possible opportunity for 400+ years. Nothing about his backstory would have made any impact on the characters affected, because its not an excuse, its not even an explanation! Caleb had the same childhood and he loved the Boiling isles. Eat boots Belos.
Ok, buckle up cause this is gonna be a long one, we gotta have a chat about Belos as a character, because there's been so many takes about this i keep seeing about " he never accepted the isles the way luz did" and "He had 400 years to change and he never took the took the offer", because it just seems like the fandom wants to kinda ignore a lot of the nuance about his situation and why it's not that simple?
and i'm for sure certain it's because the fandom is obviously already pretty biased against him since he's the villain, and what he does to the main characters as well as represents.
And that's fine, obviously he becomes a pretty bad person, no one is obligated to like him and it's ok to feel uncomfortable given the character he is.
But i think a lot of these issues as to why people have such mixed opinions about the finale has a lot to do directly with the fact the show DID keep his backstory as vague as they did, when if they had gone into it i think we would've had less of this discourse.
Now none of this is me excusing him obviously, but the fandom is very adamant to just not allow him to have depth either, when....he's allowed to be irredeemable and have depth at the same time. He's meant to be a very human villain, a character that could happen to anyone under the right circumstances
So not exploring that depth, why it got how it did, and how things like it can be prevented is a flaw within the show and among a lot of fans.
And to be fair, the show does not HAVE to do it, but the show also clearly wrote his character to have a lot of implied depth whether people like it or not, him coming from a very real religious group alone and making him a foil to luz has turned what could of been a very one note villain into one with a lot of layers to his villainy.
And if the show wants to make belos a very one note villian, no depth, they could of very easily done this by just cutting out details like his love and care for his brother, or just make make him want to destroy witches simply because he decided on his own they were worth destroying.
But that's not exactly what they've presented belos as being.
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The show thrives in having characters who aren't just simple nor cookie cutter.
Hunter isn't just some cocky sidekick, he's an abused teenager who craves love and affection, and is willing to go high and low to earn it, terrified to be thrown away and replaced and constantly is forced into a mold just to get the affection he craves. He's highly sheltered and isolated just because his father figure doesn't want him to be his own person since that wasn't what he was created for
King isn't just a tiny little brat who craves power, he's a child whose been lied to about his past, and he wanted nothing more then to be taken seriously and feel a sense of belonging. He believes that he wants power, but finds out he really only wanted to be treated like anyone else, and that he's far happier with a family that loves and cares about him rather then being a powerful demon king.
Lilith isn't just a self important antagonist who wants to force eda to do what she wants, she grew up close to her sister and wanting to be by her side well into the future, but felt a sense of inadequacy in comparison to eda. The pressures of the coven system and need to win against her sister made her make a drastic choice she regrets and she wants nothing more then to fix it and make everything the ideal fantasy they grew up wanting to have together. She's also a large nerd, craves the attention of higher figures since her own mother used to put all the attention on eda, and changed her appearance just so people would take her seriously.
And the show does this with most of it's cast, obvi there's the exception like tibbles and even bosha who don't have too much to them, but they're also very minor antagonists and there's still stuff you can pick up on.
Belos however is the main antagonist, everything that happens in the show, happens because of him, his entire backstory is basically why the plot of the show happens.
Not just that, but also caleb and evelyn, if it weren't for the drama between these three, there would be no show.
And people are WELL aware these three aren't the main leads, they aren't going to be the main focus of most episodes and obviously the show was going to end in the favor of the main characters.
But
the story the show tells between these three ties very strongly into the ones with the leads too. We are given at least enough details to notice parallels between stuff that happens with characters like luz, and characters like philip.
We know philip and luz grew up in gravesfield, we know there were outcasts there, and they had one family member they relied on to support them there. They ended up in the demon realm, they both learned magic, and they both are strongly motivated by their beliefs regarding the isles.
So there's a lot they share in common, which makes it really easy to take a look at philip and say "Well it's his fault for not being like luz and accepting the isles like she did".
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But, there's a lot of differences here
Luz grew up with fantasy, with magic stories about witches and heroes and demons. Philip grew up in a 1600s puritan village which demonized this stuff, he was a young child growing up being told this stuff was evil and he was taught to fight against it.
Luz felt odd for her interests and out there personality but at worst she felt isolated and misunderstood, she didn't like her mom's efforts to change her to be "Normal". Philip actually conformed to gravesfield, caleb clearly encouraging his brother to do so, just so both of them could fit in with the town. Had they not conformed at best they'd be isolated, but at worst they'd be dead.
Camilia is an adult who eventually opens up and talks to luz about how it was wrong to try and change her to be "Normal", that she herself hid her own interests to do so.
Caleb, was a child, he did not have any open conversations with his younger brother. Caleb hid evelyn and his interests with witches from philip and then on top of this, left philip behind.
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You could absolutely say the fact caleb didn't talk to philip is pure speculation, and not confirmed at all. That all of this could be summed up to unreliable narrators.
But we know caleb left for the isles before philip did, we know it took time for philip to find him again (because his beard grew out), we know caleb had a wife who seems to be pregnant, that he was introducing philip to (Implying he not only hasn't seen philip in awhile, but that eve and philip have never met to caleb) and all of that alone feeds into the fact caleb left him behind to start another life. This is all shown in his memories alone, stuff we can't chalk up to unreliable narrators.
So the most logical conclusion to come to is caleb left philip to start a new family, we don't have a lot of details as to if caleb ever planned to return, if caleb had good reasons to do what he did, or much about his mindset.
But we have enough to know Philip loved and looked up to caleb, that he relied on caleb, and caleb lied and left him.
There is again, reason to tie this back to camila and luz.
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but this is not a child leaving a parent behind, this is a parental figure leaving a child behind.
This is what i mean by the issue being lack of clear answers, people claim caleb left when philip was an adult, but we actually have no confirmed evidence for this. We have enough of philip's memories to know 2 things, that he was still a teenager when caleb was meeting evelyn, and he was an adult when he arrived.
You could argue philip was an adult by the time caleb left, but it's so vauge you can also argue caleb left when philip was a child and philip didn't figure out his way to the demon realm till adulthood and there's not enough proof to go one way or another.
now titan dad says philip had no genuine reasons for his actions, that he did this all for glory, but as steve put it back in OTWAT, the titan is just a guy.
And given the collector situation, he can make mistakes and screw up just like anyone else.
Titan dad only sees what he can see and make observations based on what he sees. He saw a human come to the isles with a bias already against witches, who ended up killing his brother, who claimed to come here to save others and that's all he's going to see philip as being. Someone who wants to save others but just hurts them instead.
He has no reason to know what philip grew up under, nor does he have reason to know philip and caleb's story before they arrived. There's no denying philip did love caleb, and that they were close, but that caleb leaving him behind for witches drove them apart.
I think the problem ppl even have with what titan dad says is purely because the fans take it at face value, because let's be honest, most fans will believe the objective heroes for what they assume over the villians. And since the show again, leaves philip's story vauge, and never puts it in the main focus, people will just assume what titan dad says must be the truth.
Like yes, you can pick up on these details if you are paying attention, but most people won't do that, so a lot of fans will listen to the god telling them what philip's motivations are coming from rather then put together the sense of betrayal from caleb that hurt philip that most of the evidence is actually pointing to.
philip had no parents, and had no one but caleb as far as we can tell, and then caleb left him too, like he didn't want him anymore.
And he left him in a bigoted town, alone.
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the damage this could of done if he was a child is pretty darn bad, and for philip to assume this happened because of a witch means reinforcing everything he's been taught about witches.
Caleb lied about his changes, so when caleb sees him again, caleb seems to be a different person, which does fit with what philip says to luz about the isles "Brainwashing people".
tho you can argue that that's not the truth, that philip knows caleb did it on purpose and killed him for betraying him, cause of how he blames him in episodes like FTF.
But again, this is the result of leaving things vague, because either situation is plausible.
it's plausible philip never intended to kill caleb at all and he died as the result of trying to protect eve because the show says he was trying to target evelyn to save caleb, and it's plausible he died on purpose out of philip's rage for caleb leaving him. Because guess what? That means caleb had the means to go see him and could've seen him but made the choice NOT to, so yeah, that's pretty heartbreaking.
again, this also comes into play regarding Philips's guilt.
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People objectively keep saying philip HAS no guilt regarding caleb, but we have evidence for both guilt and non guilt.
Now, sure, his portrait of dead caleb implies philip is not guilty for his death based on his expression after the fact. We also have the fact philip shows distain towards the grimwalkers, that he never outright expresses he feels bad to anyone.
But, we also have caleb's death being treated as one of philip's worst memories in KT that he objectively recalls in horror, he says he "Tried" to save caleb in FTF, which implies he wanted to save him and that he's mad he didn't manage to do so. The grimwalkers and caleb could be seen as ghosts, but also as hallucinations, and if you are seeing them as the latter then it makes sense he'd be seeing them out of some level of guilt towards having them killed.
If the show had these details explained more fully, it would be easy to either deem belos as being a murderous dick with no remorse who thinks killing was the right thing, or as a guilt ridded stubborn murderer who wants to not acknowledge he was wrong and screwed up.
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it's why people are split, because you could objectively choose to see him both ways and the ending will affect you differently depending on what you picked up on.
But now let's talk about philip not changing, because people have bashed him for not doing so in the 400 years he's been there and that he had opportunities to do so but didn't.
And i think this is half right, half wrong.
Philip came to the isles with biases, he basically grew up in a cult, he came in thinking he was traveling into hell to go find caleb. Caleb encouraged his hatred, and then his hatred got further pushed when caleb seemed to be kidnapped, and then further pushed when he was surrounded by nothing but bigots.
So this man was already on a bad foot compared to luz, who was here to live out the fantasy books she grew up on, and objectively would have no reason to hate or fear witches nearly as much.
And we do know while the BI can be compassionate, it also has it's issues, even luz faced discrimination for being human herself while on the isles. Being powerless there is well, not great, it's why luz had to figure out her own way to do things alongside everyone else.
And the Bi ARE dangerous, especially for humans, so it's at least understandable philip is not going to just show up and look past the flesh eating plants, the evil weather, and the lack of anything he can even objectively eat.
Now philip could of considered things outside of his bias, and made the effort to try and look at things from a new perspective. But we also have to acknowledge that it's not easy to come out of this long time brainwashing either, and that it takes time and help to do so.
And philip, didn't seem to have that.
Yes, caleb grew up the same way, but not only was he older, which already set him up to question things more. But he had evelyn, he had someone to challenge him and his views and change his mind.
Philp, doesn't have that, there is no confirmation anyone ever really chose to challenge his views or make him realize he was following a lie.
Caleb could of but caleb left.
All we see is philip, isolated, following the beliefs he was taught and being hostile to witches, and witches rightfully being hostile back, which just further is feeding into his bias.
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You can assume philip had chances to change but didn't, but there's no real strong evidence of that being offered to him either. That any witch ever tried to make him question anything.
It's pure speculation.
Now Philip is a stubborn ass dude for sure, so yeah, we can claim he just simply didn't want to consider it.
But people are claiming Philip was shown help that he didn't take and that's just not true. We never see anyone asking him to do the right thing or making him question things, at least not compassionately.
no one to our knowledge ever did challenge him, or did reach out to him, not even in the show itself.
Luz is rightfully hostile towards him even when trying to challenge him, hunter does attempt to try and come up with helpful ideas but he would silence himself if his uncle didn't like it (Not to mention the existing fact that he is supposed to be a caleb replacement so his existence comes from philip not wanting him to change or question things philip thinks caleb should not), and well....collector giving him a hug isn't gonna do anything at that point to stop him from thinking the worst of the isles.
This is partially because belos has the power in scenes, that if he hears what he doesn't want to hear he can quickly silence the individual and ignore it.
He's basically put in situations where no one is challenging him and if they are, they're usually doing it with distain and he's responding like a dick right back.
So maybe not much could of been done when belos has become emperor, outside of some rare occurrences where he has no choice but to listen or if he was challenged by someone he respected and would be less willing to hurt. Maybe he's too far gone to back out now and has too much power to even allow himself to consider what anyone had to say, even if they did do it kindly and wouldn't face his wrath.
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but he was only emperor for 50 years too.
So ok, what about before that?
Well, yeah, maybe there were chances he could of been, but that's a period of time we only see so much of, and none of it shows one way or the other that Philip was offered the chance to improve.
I think had we gotten a scene of philip being offered a chance to do good, to consider things, that he knew he was wrong and still rejected it, it would back up this whole "Philip made the choice to not get better" thing people claim.
but truth is, it's speculation, we don't know.
A guy who spent his life buying into where he grew up and came in with biases that became a cycle of him being terrible and witches reinforcing what he thought isn't just suddenly going to change his mind and be nice now on a whim unless those biases are challenged in a way he can't deny.
it's on him for not considering looking on things outside of his bias for sure, but people seem to think doing that is simple and easy and it's really not.
Philip had no evelyn, he was left with no one but his bias and stubborn mind.
It's like king said back in hollow mind " People don't want to believe they've been following the wrong person their whole lives", and philip didn't have a luz like hunter did to help him realize how wrong he really was.
Instead it got worse and worse.
This is why philip feels real, because this can happen to people, that they can grow up with hate and never receive the help they needed to pull them out of the mindset. So they get worse, they become worse people.
and we can argue philip didn't deserve the chance to get better, but you'll never know if you don't try and we don't know if anyone did try before he was too far gone.
to think all of this could of been avoided if caleb actually spoke to his brother and gave him the chance to change...
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Tying this all back to the beginning-
Philip's story ties into luz, they are foils in a lot of ways, but people need to remember they have differences outside of luz being a good person and philip being a bad person. Those differences make them into the people they are.
That luz was set up to love the isles in a way philip was set up to come in with a bias against it.
That it is not as simple as "Philip should of just got better" given what happened to him and the lack of help he had.
That philip never really is objectively shown to be offered genuine chances to reconsider his views on the show as much as people keep claiming so, and it's mostly all assumption at this point.
That so much of this argument over whether he's one way or the other could of been fixed if the show hadn't kept things vague.
By doing so, it leaves a lot for interpretation about him and therefore means people will have different views on what he thinks and feels and therefore will have different views on how his death should of been handled.
Caleb and philip tie into camila and luz, they tie into the clawthrone sisters, they are the basis for the plot of the series, they tie into hunter and the themes of being understood and being honest about yourself and conformity and it is no wonder people care about them.
It is incredibly valid if anyone expecting this story, that tied into the plot so hard ,as well as the themes, was upset it felt unexplained or dropped in the finale.
Especially since the fandom, with an obvious hatred for belos, responded to it by treating titan dad's word as god and simplifies philip's story completely despite everything i just mentioned here.
It is perfectly fine if you are not someone who cares about belos, but the people who do are perfectly allowed to be bothered that the show itself kept the complexity vague and not addressed and none of it mattered when it came to how his arc ended.
And that the only person who properly gives a personal opinion of what he thinks his motives are, simplifies him to being evil, and the fandom roles with that and the show never tries to do much to prove otherwise despite the evidence.
because this is a fascinating story about how conformity and bigotry can drive two close brothers apart and it feels like a story the show should of at least dedicated more of an episode to.
Especially since there's no clear idea if we'll ever get extra toh content to really tie any of this up.
Again, none of this excuses belos/philip for what he did, does, or tries to do, no amount of his life being screwed over and people treating him bad and not reaching out to him will ever excuse the fact he went so far.
But let's also just, not pretend it was an easy fix either, that someone can just....stop believing what they believe with the drop of a hat.
Especially given how this can reflect real people who are made into people like this.
He is nuanced, and people are attached to this villain for good reasons.
Nothing is simple about him, and it's just a product of how the show has handled his character.
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rzyraffek · 6 months
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This is my first time doing an ask, but I was wondering if I could request an ftm/ftnb reader x slasher fic (any character you think would fit/any character you want to add) where the reader has trouble breathing in the winter/cold and wearing their binder just makes it worse and their whole body is sore due to going up and down stairs so much so they can't keep up with the slashers longer strides and has to run after them.
Like, if the reader and the slashers were at the zoo or somewhere outside and the reader just started to take SUPER deep breaths just to be able to breathe normally or just to get air; especially after walking up or down stairs or hills.
And at one point the reader just gets tired of having to take so many deep breaths so they just go the the bathroom and take off their and layer two jackets over their shirt since they didn't bring an extra bra.
And like about 20 minutes later, reader STILL has to take super deep breaths just to actually breathe and having to run after the slashers just to be able to walk next to them; but with how sore reader is, they can't keep up with their partner and often has to take 3-minute breaks just to be able to catch their breath.
Remember binder users! You should wear them only up to 6hours daily! Dont ruin your ribcage!! I use to wear binder so yeah, I get it.
Anyways👹ofc i will write this!
So bacially, ftm s/o struggles with breathing due to binder and weather! You didn't specified which slashers so I will just go with flow on this one!
Slashers with s/o that struggles with breathing due to binder
Micheal Myers
Don't worry dude is used to noises of people choking to death lol
But fr dude gets a bit worried? He doesn't like how sometimes s/o has to take breaks just to breathe
If you guys are in rush and s/o has to take a break dude will just "hell nah fuck this" and pick s/o up
Micheal really doesn't care about gender or sex. Your a dude? 👍. There's no need to 'prove it' or look certain way for him to belive you
Brahms Heelshire
Dude fr will set a timer on his phone so s/o won't 'overdose' binder 😭
Erm honey you are starting to hyperventilate, its time for a break dont you think?
Brahms acually did his homework and read bunch of articles about binders and now he understands way more😊👍
Darling remember to exercise before and after you wear it so it less uncomfy
Finds s/o very cute and squishes them too hard sometimes
Billy Lenz
????
The fuck?Are you suffocating or something? *judges*
What feels worse? Wearing binder a bit too tight or billy sitting on your chest while your trying to sleep?
Bro doesn't understand what is "gender dysphoria" and tired to hide s/o binder once cuz he didnt trust it
Lucky for you Billy doesn't go outside, so you don't have to worry about him getting lost walking faster than you
What are pronouns?
Jason Voorhees
Oh Jason you big baby
Jason just feels bad, cuz he knows that s/o feels less cool without the binder but baby you cant breathe😭
Of course he will wait for s/o and he won't rush them at all!
Will try to convince s/o to not wear binder so often. Jason sees you as a perfect boufriend weather you wear it or no
Genuinely worried about s/o health
Asa Emory
Ah creature, why would you think that wearing binder for whole day was a good idea?
Dude is smart, he already knew what binders are!
He is aware that trans people often struggle with dysphoria and he can't just be like "dont wear a binder lol" so he tries to calming explain that nono honey you are a man even if you don't have a flat chest i love you
If he finds out that s/o whats a top surgery, Asa went "Alr bet" and then your bank account blew up
Funfact! If s/o was openly trans before they met Asa... dude was convinced that s/o just has severe asthma 😭 he was like ??? Uh do you have your inhalator with you?? Or like is it temporary???
👽guys I ate good chicken today. With sauce
Also im not sure if its good? I kinda forgot how to write entering stuff😭😰
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bluexiao · 2 years
Text
#guy next door kind of likes you (it’s a secret though) 
—what kind of neighbor are they? and also… they kinda like you shh you’re not supposed to know that! 
CHARACTERS. Aether, Albedo, Ayato, Childe, Dainsleif, Diluc, Gorou, Itto, Kaeya, Kazuha, Scaramouche, Thoma, Venti, Xiao, Zhongli; gn! Reader 
THEMES. crack; fluff; platonic to romance kind of; has implications of being a drunkard (venti’s part) 
NOTES. I was originally going to go for the college headcanons but i decided to do it next time since this one seemed too adorable to not write now. 
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ZHONGLI is the gentleman neighbor. Always helping whenever you needed, always greeting you in the mornings when he goes to work and you were also about to do so with yours, or when you two also see each other when you both go home. Sometimes, he invites you to tea, especially when you openly show that you are comfortable with him and consider him as a friend. Actually, he sort of became your confidant. If you had anyone or anything you were frustrated with, it would be his pleasure to hear your worries and rants. He also has a knack of giving you history lessons… he doesn’t really mind even if you feel sleepy from hearing them, he’d find it adorable when he finds you asleep that time he was comforting you through his stories even. 
XIAO is the neighbor who glares at you or narrows his eyes at you when you meet his gaze. You always think that he is angry at you, so you never tried to approach him. At first. One day, however, you were walking home alone and he had saved you when some drunk person tried to hit on you. You invited him to dinner the next day in thanks for this, and since then, you found out that he wasn’t angry or irritated at you. He was just… normally like that, especially when it’s someone who he did not know much. The more you got to know him, the more you got curious about what else he would open up to you. He’s kind of like an onion; will sting you a couple of times with his words, but will nonetheless have many layers, but all the layers were a part of him, and you had grown to love each one of them. Before you know it, you will be considered the one closest to him and one of the very few people he trusted. Unbeknownst to both you and him, he was feeling more than that. 
VENTI is a friendly neighbor who is always drunk at night. He probably was already your friend before you came to know that he was a drunkard. He’s not dangerous when he’s drunk though, but it still makes you raise your brow. He looks too frail to always drink alcohol, you probably had told him off when he sometimes knocks on your door at night to greet you in his drunk state. He would nervously laugh as he says hi to you, ask you how your day is, and rants over his own day before saying goodnight and going back to his own apartment. 
THOMA is the neighbor who brings you food even when there are no special occasions! (Well, all the more so when there is one. He may even cook a feast, to be honest.) That’s why it’s not a surprise that you always have food even when you are not good at cooking. Maybe if you don’t, he will probably even offer to always bring you food, saying that he could always cook a little bit more since he lives alone. In return, you always insist on taking him out on a Movie Night (nOT a movie date… yet). He always has this specific time where he knocks on your door and hand over food for you (or eat with you, actually), but whenever he couldn’t, you would be the one to either cook for him or send him ordered food or take him out. It was just a thing for you two as neighbors and friends. Whenever you two would eat together, you two just talk about random things, mostly about his employers or knowing about each other more. What you don’t know about him, however, is the very same reason why he keeps on cooking food for you. 
SCARAMOUCHE is the neighbor who angers you a lot. He teases you but he looks like he absolutely despises you—oh how wrong you are there though. He would be the type to rile you up and laugh at your “pathetic face”, that was what you’re used to. When you one day snapped at him though, he suddenly stopped teasing you that way. “Well? Are you going to tease me again?” “You said you didn’t like it, didn’t you? Don’t tell me-“ “Do you think I’ll believe that you are stopping for my well-being?!” “Well, I… never mind! Suit yourself!” “Hey! What did you mean by that?!” Your neighbor is kind of a mixture of a straightforward man who is also kind of a liar. Well, he’ll only show the other side of him when it’s something about his weakness… which is you. 
KAZUHA is the neighbor who always hangs around his lawn or porch; either reading a book, sleeping, on his phone, or having a pen and paper in his hands. A very chill neighbor, for short. He’s not too friendly, not too cold. When you meet his eyes, he gives you a warm smile or a nod. If you greet him vocally, he would return the favor and since then would greet you vocally first. “Good morning”s, “Have a nice day”s, and “Take care”s. You later on found out that he only did not speak to you because he wanted to know if you were comfortable with him talking to you, but he did want to approach you. 
KAEYA is the neighbor who you thought is a crime leader or something but it turns out, he’s working for the government and is a high-ranking official. Quite unexpected, no? It was probably the reason why you became more curious about the guy. Well, it doesn’t take long until he approached you and introduced himself to you. He seemed rather nice… a little flirty, but he’s not uptight or someone who thinks himself highly just because of his occupation. Also, he does kind of look good… Maybe you should flirt back every once in a while? Maybe accept going to the “dates” he was offering a couple of times? He doesn’t seem that suspicious… right? 
ITTO is a loud neighbor. Always has his “gang” or group of friends staying with him or hanging out in his apartment. Sometimes, you could even hear them conversing around the hallways. You dreamed of telling them off but you were also quite fearful. ITTO is a big man. Even if his personality differs from his stature—from what you observed—he still looks strong. One day, however, you decided enough was enough and knocked on his door, then calling your neighbor despite having people in his apartment. Again. You could only sigh and almost roll your eyes as the “gang” cheered when you had asked to call for their “boss”. When you were about to tell him about your frustrations, you noticed something strange. He is… is he blushing? 
GOROU is the cute neighbor. He’s quite adorable and looks very friendly too so you’re probably the first to approach him and introduce yourself. You found that your assumptions are right, only… he seemed very flustered when you greeted him the first time. Oh? What is this? Is he… embarrassed or something? With this, you decided you wanted to find out why without directly asking him. You’ve begun hanging out with him every chance you two got; whenever the two of you see each other in the hallway, or when you see each other at the convenience store near your homes, buying ramens for your dinners after admitting that you both were too tired and lazy to cook something healthy. Or when you were walking homeand pass by GOROU talking with his friends, and when he sees you, his eyes will gleam as he calls you over. But then, you were slowly realizing that he was only doing that kind of expression whenever he was talking to you. Only you. Oh. 
DILUC is the rich front neighbor—you were doubting how the hell you had even gotten a quaint house in front of his mansion. You sometimes looked over at his mansion a few times, wondering to yourself how much money it would cost before going over your day. He is also the talk of the town, it seems. Your elderly neighbor (the one beside your house) once told you that the owner of the house is a bachelor who inherited a wine business from his father. Because of that, you kind of had a background about DILUC, but you decided not to pry further. You supposed a private man would not like his private affairs out in the open, no? Well, that bit is something that you would find out sooner than later because you soon met this rich front door neighbor but he ignores you after you smiled at him out of respect. Although it was not too long until a maid comes over and asks you if you will be available for the weekend, as their Master DILUC wanted to eat lunch with you and apologize for his rudeness. Wait, what? 
DAINSLEIF is the neighbor whom you thought is either a divorcee or just a single man who has no plans to marry. After all, there were no kids or spouses in the house, right? He looks quite attractive though sometimes you wonder why that is the case. Maybe because of your curiosity that you probably caught his attention. Because one day, he greeted you while you were at a fast food restaurant not that far away from your homes. He sat in front of you and was rather good at small talk, telling you that there was no other table left and since he recognized you, it was most practical to stay and try to ask you if you would be willing to share. If it was anyone else, you would have said no. If it really was anyone else. But it was him—the same neighbor you had been dying to talk to but couldn’t find the courage to do so. 
CHILDE is also the rich neighbor, but he is quite talkative, huh? Sometimes, you find him appealing, sometimes he’s kind of suspicious. He says he is a merchant or something but it doesn’t seem to be like that. Why does a merchant even have lots of subordinates who regularly visit him? Suspicious. Either way, you decided not to bother with him. It’s just that he approached you first. You thought it was just harmless greetings and small talks, but you felt like he was… intentionally wanting to get close to you. You wanted to ask him and find out why… but now, he was already asking you out on a second date. Wait… when was the first date, even?
Oh, you probably know about your neighbor, AYATO, because he sure is famous around town. There’s no one who had never heard his name or his family’s name. Not only are they famous for being rich, but they all have blessed genes of good looks. However, they don’t go outside often, only a few times during the weekends. One day, however, you saw a particularly handsome man on their garden and it took you a moment to realize that he was Kamisato AYATO… and that time was spent with him waving your way, crossing the street and introducing himself to you. “Ah, nice to meet you A-Wait, you’re Ayato? The Ayato?” you blurted out without thinking, and you probably heard the most handsome laugh your whole life. 
ALBEDO is a silent neighbor, but one day you got a knock from your door and find a cute little girl with pigtails, asking you if she could stay with you for the meantime. You were about to reject her because who the hell is she? But she shows you a picture of ALBEDO, your neighbor, and tells you she’s his younger sister, Klee. You were still reluctant about letting a stranger in your house so you stayed and played with her outside instead. It turns out, you actually enjoyed spending time with the little girl. You just didn’t know that Klee already told her brother to make you her official babysitter… to help her brother to also get close to you, of course! After all, brother Bedo has a crush on neighbor Y/n. Well, it would be a win-win situation, right? Klee is definitely the best matchmaker ever! 
AETHER is the helpful next-door neighbor who usually assists you or others with their groceries or when crossing the pedestrian right in front of the apartment complex you all live at. Even if he’s tired from university or his part-time job he still tries his best to look like he isn’t, you noticed, and that was one thing you wished you could tell him. But you found yourself hesitating because you two were not really that close. Sure, you two had small talks and all, but you two were merely acquaintances. As far as you were aware of. Well, his rose-tinged cheeks, usual greetings through text messages, and his worried looks whenever you looked tired were just his concern as a fellow person, right? 
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malleux · 7 months
Text
performance anxiety.
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-> lyney x fem!famous singer!reader
-> warnings: mentions of past bad relationship, anxiety, no use of y/n
-> words: 3.4k
[a/n]: this was not supposed to be this long but. not proofread, idk what universe this is in where all of these characters are friends but shut up. i just started writing, gun to my head i could not tell you what happens in this story
Applause. Roses. Adoration. Entertainment. 
You craved the effervescence of the spotlight. The thrill of being on stage. Millions of eyes are on you and you alone– coming together for the sole purpose of viewing you. 
It seemed a bit voyeuristic, but you couldn’t care less as the final notes of your song rang out across stages all over the country and applause replaced the roaring in your ears. People stood as they clapped, whooping and hollering. All for you. 
You stood before them night after night, baring the roughest edges of yourself on the stage for them all to judge. You were vulnerable to every attack possible– verbal, physical, emotional. Yet none occurred, save for the dozens of flowers that showered you every night as you completed a performance flawlessly once again. 
It was only after you made it backstage to your dressing room that you finally took a breath. A very shaky, very exhausted breath. Stagehands ran back and forth, putting up props and fixing light fixtures for someone else’s performance the next night, but they reassured you that nobody could possibly outshine you after you had christened the Opera Epiclese. 
Your first performance in Fontaine. In your hometown. 
“That was amazing!” Your manager burst through the door, a cup of water in her hands. She passes it to you. “One of your best performances yet– not that the others were bad! Quite the opposite, actually–”
“I get it. Thank you.” You chewed on your lip, gazing at yourself in the mirror. You looked frazzled up close with the stage makeup slightly smeared across your face. Not enough for the audience to notice, though. No, to them, you were perfection. “I hope they thought the same.”
“Are you kidding? You were amazing. I bet you made at least ten men think about leaving their wives for you tonight.” You cut your eyes at her, and she backtracked immediately. “I-I mean! Oh, that was such a bad analogy, wasn’t it? I’m sorry.”
“It’s fine.” 
It really wasn’t fine, but you weren’t going to make your friend-turned-manager feel any worse than she already does for bringing up the past. You weren’t married– Archons, no– but you lived a fast life that not many were equipped to handle, especially if they were staying home while you traveled Teyvat on a tour. 
Your ex couldn’t handle you and your lifestyle, so he handled others in bed instead. 
It didn’t sting as bad as you would have expected it to. You couldn’t take the time to grieve, not when there was a performance in Natlan the night you found out. Other performers and those who lived a more nomadic lifestyle had warned you about failed relationships and friendships with those who did not stay close or did not understand the busyness of traveling. You truly believed you were the exception, and now you realize that such relationships are impossible. You chose this life, thus giving up the idea of a simple love. Your friends were your manager and the crew that traveled with you, and that was that. You didn’t stay anywhere long enough to culminate true, meaningful connections with anyone. 
“Are you ready for the encore?” 
You swiped another layer of lipstick on and fluffed your hair in the mirror before turning back to your manager. 
“Born ready.” 
—---
Lyney sat on the edge of his seat for the past hour and a half and continues to do so, staring at the dark stage. 
His sister keeps a hand near his chair, just in case he somehow leans too far forward and falls out of it completely. She’ll never understand his infatuation with such a famous singer– it’s not like he had a shot with you anyway. Nevertheless, she made sure to surprise him with front-row tickets the minute she learned of your performance at Fontaine’s beloved Opera Epiclese. 
Lyney nearly cried in happiness and he’s nearly crying now, praying to every Archon above that you’re going to come out for an encore and that this isn’t the end of your show. The tears almost fall as the spotlight graces the stage once more and music fills the room. 
Everyone in Fontaine tried to get tickets for your performance and the most influential of citizens were sure to attend. Furina sat in the VIP box, leaning on her hand as she watched you step back onstage. She was quiet for once, enraptured by your voice. Clorinde was at her side. Neuvillette sat near the twins, seated but smiling. Charlotte and Navia were a bit further back, Charlotte furiously scribbling on her notepad to review the performance. She stopped writing halfway through, though, unable to stop herself from just enjoying the performance. Wriothesley and Sigewinne showed their faces from outside of the Fortress, the former succumbing to the latter’s pleas for tickets. Even Freminet was there, on the other side of Lyney, just happy to see his brother so happy. 
And yet there he was, sitting in the middle of the row, front and center. A perfect view. And there you were, in that jaw-dropping dress that sparkled perfectly in the lights, reflecting the same way the stars in the sky shined. Lyney was positive there were also stars in his eyes, but he couldn’t help it. 
And when the performance was over, Lyney finally sat back in his seat and exhaled a deep breath– one he had been holding since the minute you appeared onstage. 
Lynette looked him over as if to make sure he was okay and happy. She didn’t need any words to tell that he was over the moon. “Are you ready to go?”
“Just– just give me one minute.”
—---
“How long will you be in Fontaine?”
“Probably a week or two, at most.” You hummed, finally eating a snack left for you by the Hydro Archon herself. “It’s been a long time since I’ve been home. I’d like to stay a bit longer.” 
“Hmm,” Furina’s finger tapped her chin– a clear sign that she was thinking. About what, nobody could tell. “How about another performance before you leave? Many people didn’t get tickets to this first show. You’ve had so many supporters from here since you started. Why not give them a special thanks? Especially me, since I’ve supported you and been your friend for all these years?” 
You squinted at her for a moment, trying to decipher what she could be devising in her head. You weren’t a mind reader, and Furina didn’t necessarily all have it going on in her head, so you opted to just ask her outright. “What could you possibly gain from that?” 
She reeled back, feigning offense. “Nothing! It’s-it’s just that it’s great for business. And we’re having special visitors soon who may want to see. Totally not because I want to watch it again– heh.”
“What special visitors?”
“Why, the Traveler and Paimon, of course!” Furina clapped, “Yes, yes. They’d love to see your performance.”
“Hm.” You continued staring at her, unconvinced that the legendary Traveler wanted to see your performance. But, you did get to perform again and get a part of the profits. You didn’t see why not. “Fine.” 
The squeal that came out of Furina’s mouth was enough to almost break your glass of water– a feat many singers trained to do for years and could not accomplish. Yet, your friend was close to doing it without even trying out of sheer excitement. 
She grabbed your hand once you were done changing clothes and dragged you out of the dressing room. You had no choice but to follow as she led you into the main room, where the audience sat. It looked much different from before with the lights on and the chairs empty. 
Except for two chairs, three people still present in the opera house. 
At the sound of her voice, the three turned around. There was a pair of twins and a younger blonde boy. The twin boy made eye contact with you and seemed to shoot straight up, becoming entranced as he saw you. This was typically a normal reaction for fans, but there was one difference this time. 
You were entranced too. 
Furina looked at the three and huffed. “Isn’t it time for you to go home?”
“Sorry, Lady Furina,” The youngest boy spoke and motioned to the other boy, whose face was bright red. “Lyney just needed to sit for a minute.”
“Is he okay?” You tilted your head, gently shaking free of Furina and walking to them. Furina gasped and crossed her arms, almost angry that she didn’t have your attention anymore as your self-titled “best friend”. “Your face is hot.” 
The twin girl hid her mouth with her hand. “He’ll be okay eventually. I think he got overheated or something. Got all nauseous and dizzy.”
“Oh my Gods, I’m so sorry!” You felt awful– you had told someone that you felt the air was a bit too hot in the audience, but you were brushed off. This just proved that you were right. “You all come with me, there’s fresh water and everything in the guest house I’m staying in tonight.”
You ushered everyone out of Opera Epiclese and into the small building next to it. It was the guesthouse, built solely for performers without a place to stay as they traveled. You were given it for your time in Fontaine and couldn’t be more grateful, especially at a time like this when someone is in need. 
Lyney, Lynette, and Freminet– as you learned their names were– followed you and a pouting Furina into the house. You offered them all a seat on the couches and chairs before running to the kitchen and grabbing a bowl of cool water and a rag. You sat next to Lyney, who was silent the entire time, and neared his face as you put the rag on his forehead. You were a bit confused at Lynette and Furina’s snickering behind you, but you could only worry about the boy in front of you whose face turned even redder at your closeness. 
“Say,” Furina spoke up, “Lyney and Lynette here are performing at the Opera Epiclese tomorrow. Fancy a show?”
“Really?” You looked into Lyney’s eyes, “What do you do?”
He swallowed, and you wondered if he needed a glass of water. “Magic.”
“You’re magicians? No way!” You grinned, “I’ve always wanted to see a magic show live! Furina, I think we should go. I’d love to see more of these two.”
“I do too.” Lynette joined, “We can get you on the reservation list for front and center… unless you’d like to sit VIP with Furina?” 
“We’ll both sit front row. Neuvillette can have front row if he wishes to attend.” Furina grinned at Lynette, and you couldn’t help but feel like you were missing out of something as you cared for Lyney. 
“Wonderful.” Lynette stands up, followed by Freminet. “I think Lyney just needs rest now, but we don’t live far in the Court of Fontaine. We probably need to head out before it gets too late.” 
You nod and hold your hand out to Lyney, who takes a second of staring before taking your hand and hoisting himself up. You both definitely hold on a bit too long to be typical for someone you just met, but exceptions could always be made. 
“I’ll see you tomorrow then, Lynette.” You glance back at the boy at your side. “Lyney.” 
“Y-yes.” He speaks. You like his voice. “Tomorrow evening. I’d love to see you there.” 
After the three left, Furina stayed on your couch and stared. 
You sat across from her, staring back with a puzzled expression. 
This was the longest you’d ever heard her be quiet and it was incredibly unnerving. You couldn’t take much more of this. 
“What?”
Another beat of silence. “What do you mean ‘what’?”
“What do you mean ‘what do you mean’? What did I do?”
“You’ve never done that before.”
“Done what, Furina? I don’t have time for this–”
“Gotten all flustered like that. You don’t even dote on me like that and I’m your best friend.”
“Lynette said that he got overheated during the performance.” You defended, “I had to help him, I felt bad. I told the crew that it was too hot in there but they didn’t listen–”
“You’re stupid.” Before you could retort in offense, Furina leaned forward. “You haven’t been that open and nice since…” 
You’re glad she doesn’t finish that sentence– doesn’t let his name leave her mouth. Furina is right and you know it, but you definitely don’t want to admit that. Especially not to her. 
“I just felt bad.” She doesn’t believe you and you know it. “Fur, you know I can’t. People can’t keep up with my life. He’s cute, but I’m better off alone.” 
Furina looks away for a moment as if to think about what she’s going to say next for the first time ever. “He’s different.” 
“You don’t know that.”
“First, I know him better than you do. I’ve had my fair share of run-ins with that crew, and I’m the Hydro Archon. I know everyone in Fontaine.” She twirls a finger around her hair– a telltale sign that she’s desperate for someone to listen to her. You want to oblige, but your mind won’t let you. “Lyney understands the life of a performer. Has he traveled? No. But I bet he’d be more than willing to travel with you as like– an opening act or something!” She snaps her fingers as if this is some sort of life-changing revelation. 
Your anxiety says otherwise. 
“What about Lynette and Freminet?”
“They can go with you!” She says as if it’s the easiest thing in the world. “Lynette is Lyney’s assistant, so she has to go. Freminet would be good with helping with finances or something. Or if you happen to drop your wedding ring in the ocean, he can get it.”
“Wedding ring?”
“Yeah, for when you marry–”
A knock on the door interrupts her and you’ve never been happier. You give each other confused looks before you get up and open the door a crack. Behind it is a face all-too-familiar, and you open it wider. 
“I-uh, forgot my hat here.” Lyney, cheeks still rosy, rubs the back of his neck in embarrassment. 
“O-oh, of course!” You stammer out, leaving him at the door and finding his hat in one of the other chairs. Furina stares him down in a way that makes him feel like he’s intruding on a very important conversation, but he tries to brush it off as one of her theatrics. 
Lyney’s smile returns when you appear again, his hat in your hands, and tries to ignore the jump of his heart as his fingers accidentally brush yours when he takes it. “Thank you so much.” You watch as his figure begins to retreat from the guesthouse, but he quickly turns around and waves. “And I do hope to see you tomorrow.”
—---
Lyney does, in fact, get to see you tomorrow. 
Peeking through the curtain, he sees you front and center, sitting in the same exact seat that he was in the night before. Furina is at your side, chatting with you happily and ignoring the questioning whispers of her citizens as they question why she’s on the floor instead of in her box. Their questions cease when they see you. 
A bit of jealousy hits him as he sees some citizens ask for your autograph or come up to talk to you, but he can’t dwell on it long before Lynette is behind him. 
“Is she here?”
“Yes.” He lets out a nervous breath. “Everything has to be perfect tonight.” 
“It will be.” She reassures, “And don’t worry about anything else. I have it all covered. She’s come to see you and you alone, so you just focus on being the best you can be.”
Lyney has never been more grateful for his sister than he is at that moment. Sure, it was one thing when she accepted his schoolgirl crush on a famous singer, but when she was actually here, at their show, watching him, she was the best wingman in Teyvat. 
He peeked out of the curtain once more, his breath catching in his throat when he sees you looking directly at him. You wave and send him a soft smile and Lyney can feel his entire body heat up. He’s determined and ready for this show to start. 
And with a short countdown, it does. 
In most performances, Lyney keeps his eyes above the crowd. It’s an illusion many performers learn– don’t look directly at anyone specifically, it’s easier to quell the anxiety of thousands of eyes being on you, judging your every move. He knows you do this tactic as well, getting to witness it firsthand last night as you wowed the crowd from the very stage he was on tonight. He wondered how he could possibly be equal to such a wonderful performance and his mind gets a bit louder as doubts start plaguing him. As quickly as they come, however, they disappear. 
Lyney looks at you. 
You’re dressed beautifully, hair and makeup done simply as if to bare the real you. Oh, how Lyney longs to know the real you. 
You think it’s a funny coincidence when the first rose comes to you. Just a chance that a draft happened to send it directly into your lap after Lyney throws it into the crowd. Same with the second rose, that he passed off to you personally as he walked by after doing his switch trick with the box. You realize it’s not just some happenstance when the performance ends and you are left with a bouquet of roses in your hands, your face hot as Furina teases you. 
“Rainbow roses have special meaning in Fontaine, you know.” She grinned. You swatted her away. 
“I know.” You huff, “He probably uses those in every show to make the little lucky audience girl feel special.”
Furina opens her mouth to speak, but a voice from behind speaks up before she can. “I normally use Romaritime Flowers, and only pull one out of my hat, but I thought tonight I could do something a little different.”
Lyney prays you aren’t uncomfortable when you turn around– the adrenaline of the show is the only thing driving him to speak to you steadily right now, and he didn’t know what he’d do if he got rejected. He’s pleasantly surprised when you do turn around and your mouth is slightly agape, your cheeks darker than usual. He did his job. 
“They’re beautiful. Thank you.”
“Keep them, they’re yours.” Lyney places his hands on yours to push them back when you go to give him back the bouquet, but he doesn’t remove them when you clutch the flowers to your chest. “This is my official offer– let me treat you to dinner.” 
You turn your head to give Furina a look, but she’s long gone. You make a note to curse her out later. 
“Lyney, I want to accept your offer. So badly. But I just know it won’t work.”
Seeing Lyney’s face fall almost makes you want to take it back, but you can’t. You can’t get hurt again. 
“Please,” His voice has gone soft, “How do you know that?”
“It’s happened before. I’m just protecting you. I’m going to be gone soon and you can forget about this little infatuation–”
“No!” Lyney blurts out but quickly composes himself. “You’re not protecting me, you’re protecting yourself. I’m not whatever man hurt you in the past. I’m a performer too, I can handle all the things that entails.” 
“Lyn… This is only my third country on my tour. I have so many more left, I’ll be gone for a very long time. It’s not fair to ask you to wait for me.”
“I think I get to decide what’s fair for me.” You don’t respond, looking away. Lyney takes your chin between his fingers to make you look at him. “And I think that me waiting for you is a fair trade if it means you come back to me in the end. Please, ma chérie. Consider it.” 
You took a breath, weighing the options as seriously as the Oratrice. You think back to your conversations– the ones with your manager, the ones with Furina. Finally, you meet his eyes fully. Lyney hasn’t looked away, a softness in his eyes that you were not expecting.
“Let’s go to dinner. I’ve been thinking of hiring an opening act for the rest of the tour anyways. How do you feel about that?”
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iwaasfairy · 1 year
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┌─ “ ! „ MOLASSES
tw. incest, noncon to dubcon, size kink, belly bulge, a lot of praise, breeding, creampie, corruption, lotta emotions and tears, ? yandere, soft service dom! vash wordcount. 5k
a/n. if you don't watch this show please please give it a try it's grEAT ♡♡♡ I don’t know anything other than the first 8 episodes of Trigun, so there will be spoilers or references from those, but nothing else! So if you’re also watching the show for the first time you are safe. I’ve just gone off of the backstory we know so far and personal interpretation, so some things might turn out to be a little out of character in the future. ♡♡♡ hope you liKKEE it i loVEEE love these charas already im gonna cry
vash the stampede x fem!reader
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The dust that tickles your neck makes breathing heavy, sluggishly treading through layers upon layers of sand. The blanket of dust also catches the light of the sun, casting everything in a stunning brilliance while drowning out the horizon. It stings, and your feet burn with every step- you wipe a sloppy hand across your forehead, but remain just as sticky, hot and gross. All things that- in the long run- don’t matter. Or won’t matter once you’re done here.
The sand shifts under your feet, and makes the climb even slower.
Only a few more steps. You take a deep breath, and watch the scene unfolded before with a heavy feeling that makes your empty stomach churn. At the bottom of the wave of sand, the big metal cruiser stands shimmering violently under the midday sun— smoking, abandoned if the footprints are anything to go by, and recognizable. You trip your way down the mountain of sand with heavy legs, sinking down every few steps as you look around.
The faint shape of a town remains at the edge of your vision. It’s far, but not impossibly so. You wouldn’t like to do it by foot, though, can’t imagine anyone would. The vehicle, while glowing with heat, is valuable enough not to leave even its wreckage behind. And the person you’ve been trailing is no fool. If you had any energy left, that would set off more alarm bells then it does. But you still unholster your gun, the metal heavy in your hands as you raise it towards the door nearest to you. It would be safe to assume they’ve gone, and their numbers aren’t great enough to leave people lingering.
Your breathing is tight as you wipe your hands on your clothing again, one by one, and make it the last bit down in a jog. The town doesn’t look particularly rich or well-populated, but any town out in the middle of nowhere like this one, has one thing of value.
The door of the vehicle clinks mechanically as it slides open, and the engine of the vehicle blows a long, whistling noise— and your aim is perfect as you freeze up. It reveals a set of stairs into the upper deck, but you simply glare, and after a few seconds, put on a slight frown. “You can come out now.”
Your voice is steadier than you imagined it would be.
There was a time where you longed fondly for the reunion, you suppose, nights by the campfire, in other people’s company. It was impossible not to, foreign as you were to the world. Wondering where and how you belonged, if you were missed, or needed. But it’s been years… too many years, and things have changed.
And yet, his voice sounds exactly how you remember it when it comes from within the metal cage- just out of your view. “That’s awfully distant.”
“Come out or I’ll riddle this hack of shit full of bullets and leave you stranded out here,” you say now, peering through the scope along the heavy barrel, and cocking it once. “Now, Nai!”
There’s a soft chuckle, and then feet that gracefully slide down the stairs into view, each step slow and steady and confident. You expect nothing less. The white cape obstructs most of him from your view, so you don’t dare blink— until at last, he jumps down onto the shifty sand, both hands raised. “That’s Nai niichan to you, isn’t it?” It’s unbearable. The low tones of his voice are just present enough not to allow you to slip into thought, but you find yourself tearing up regardless. He’s still sickeningly perfect, light hair sweeped away from his forehead, brows soft and straight, and a smile to pierce straight through your heart.
Whatever type of restraint you convinced yourself you could have if you saw him again, seems to evaporate with the sun flares that burn above. Instantly. And though you had time to prepare yourself, the last few hours of catching up to him aren’t enough for the onslaught of emotions that crash over you as you aim that barrel straight at his face. “Cut the shit. You don’t get to talk your way out of this, not this time.” Your voice cracks, and you bite your lip. “I wasn’t expecting to pick up on your tracker this far out…” Or at all. But maybe it shouldn’t surprise you that the eldest expected you to give up on him. Given he gave up on you, too. “Where’s the rest of them?”
“Not here.” At your glare, his mouth corners twitch, and he lulls his head to the side. “I’m alone, baby sister, I promise. I sent them into town to handle business. You understand.”
The quip gets under your skin, and you’re sure he knows, but you narrow your eyes, and tighten the finger on the trigger as Nai waits. For what, you’re not entirely sure. There’s so much to say, too much for a single person’s lifetime, but you know your eldest brother. He’s strong, and shifty just as much as the sand he plays around in; and he’s most likely just entertaining you. You know that. “I should just kill you right here and now,” you end up mumbling. Sand scratches the metal of the cruiser, and the ticks of the dust hitting the surface grow louder.
“I don’t even get a chance to explain myself?” The joyful melody of his voice is everything but normal, and you want to scream, and kick and cry until it stops being so damn grating, but you can’t. You hate him. You hate him, don’t you? “How cruel.”
You snap. Voice full volume and angry, you don’t even feel the way it stings between breaths as you bark out what needs saying. “This isn’t a game, Nai! It’s been five years, and that’s all you have to say for yourself?! Explain what?!” Your vicious anger makes your entire face feel hot, burning with an entirely different purpose. “Explain how you took him away from me?! Why? What did niichan ever do, except give you chance after chance to make things right?!” All those years of your grief that built up into a ball of resentment can’t be stopped with a simple confrontation. You knew that going in. But it suddenly all comes out like a dam that’s been shattered, and floods everything else.
“And I’m to blame?”
“You killed him!” you burst, glaring so hard your eyes might make him drop dead on the spot. “He was all I had left! But you just can’t let things go! And you took him- y-you took him from me, and I’m here to make you pay.” The dry chuckle isn’t unexpected, but it still hurts. And you find yourself fighting back the very real urge to make him hurt just the same- simply taking a deep breath instead.
“Careful. Your favoritism is showing.” The white jacket rustles unnervingly in the wind, as the howling picks up in volume. It seems to thump in the same rapid rhythm your heartbeat is, and Nai raises a brow. “You’re no idiot, so I’ll assume you came with a plan. But little sister or not, even you have to realize that if I want you dead, it won’t be much of a challenge to make that happen. You’d do better trying to get along with me and show some forgiveness.”
The cold, calculated way he throws it out between you two is almost laughable. Like it’s even a choice. Like you were ever given any other choice than revenge, when he left you out here to die. Stranded, alone, with the only family you have left… “I’ll never forgive you,” your lips move, kissing the words— and wonder if you mean them. You don’t think you do, not really. But you want to either way, be it out of spite, or some sense of justice. No one could say he didn’t have it coming. “Never.” You bite back a sniffle, to caress the trigger tighter even—
a name.
your name.
called out like a gentle caress, or a brush along your cheek.
Your teary eyes focus on the movement at the top of the stairs quicker than you can process that the voice isn’t Nai. He wasn’t alone, and he lied- he always does, the child in you chants- but the voice… is familiar. Too much so. It sets every hair on your body up on end despite the heat, as a few steps sound on the metal stairs. Boots, a red coat, and you stumble back. The gun lowering automatically, dropping to the floor as heat floods your face. Heat in the form of tears, rolling thick down your cheeks. Nai barely moves, but you’re shaking as your other brother kicks up some sand and smiles, kind and wide and wholly him.
“Hey, little sister.”
Absolute disbelief floods you as you watch Vash, your Vash, stand side by side to his twin— and for a moment, you wonder if the heat got to you after all. But he moves, and though Nai moves to keep him from approaching, before you know it you can feel warm hands on your face; stroking your teary eyes and keeping you from totally collapsing. “Vash? Vash- niichan-” Your voice fails you as his blue eyes close and his matching nose bumps yours pressing his forehead to yours; and everything fails to make sense. “But I- I thought- you were dead, you were dead- I kn-” You pull back to look at Nai, then Vash, then Nai again.
The two people you had spent the last five years mourning— your kin, your blood; without grievances, alongside each other. “I looked for you.” Your own voice takes you aback with the thought. Because it’s true. You looked. Everywhere. Every sign, every possible option, you had dug for years on end to find nothing- “I checked … everything, if you reached out to me anywhere, I would have heard- I-”
You shouldn’t feel ice cold to the touch, eyes stinging as the wind picks up- but you dare glance up at your brother again- and he’s still quiet. Regretful. Sorry. The familiarity you find in those baby blues suddenly feels miles and miles away, and you take a staggered step back. It’s funny, really. “You knew.” You were always the temperamental one of the three, and you always felt more strongly than Nai did, you knew that for sure. But you used to kid yourself in saying Vash understood; as kids tend to do.
Realization hits you square in the face. “You knew I was tracking you, and you made me think-” The words die in your throat. “You left me out here. You left me to die out here. Y- to join him?!” Your head hurts, and spins, and you suddenly feel like you’re sinking into the floor with the full weight of that. Though either of them haven’t spoken yet, the silence is proof enough. It makes you sick, it burns on the way down, and you almost feel your stomach climb up into your throat.
“I had no choice, every second I didn’t- you were in danger,” Vash starts, reaching for you again, and you smack his hand away as hard as you possibly can.
“I thought you were dead! And not only did I not know, you didn’t even try. Both of you just left me-” By now, you’re barely breathing; the short, gasped hiccups aren’t enough to bring oxygen back into your system— you reach for your disposed gun to whip it back up at your brother’s face— as your frown digs so deep into your tear-ridden expression it aches. “Give me one good reason why I shouldn’t kill both of you.”
Nai only stares as your barrel goes to press against his twin’s forehead, but Vash— you suppose you were always three sides of the trifecta. If you had the temperament, and Nai nii the logic, Vash would be the emphatic one out of you all. Because even with your heavy duty gun right between his brows, his sad smile as he reaches for your cheek doesn’t fail; and he leans into you. “I’m so sorry. I’m so sorry.” Your shaky breath isn’t enough, and you pull up your runny nose as you look back at Nai.
His beautiful face, and the quiet, tender look that passes— before the icy cold returns. “We don’t have time for this, Vash.” A mechanical click is so loud and heavy and piercing, a split second before you feel something hit the back of your head hard, and the world goes dark.
+
The room is quiet, apart from the slight ruffle of the sheets with his breathing, and yours against him. Ship Three rumbles at night, like a large beast settling down- it always keeps you up longer than you want it to. Keeps you from dreaming, too. But even in the darkness, there’s other soft noises you recognize like they’ve been coded into your brain, like the way he yawns and drapes an arm around you. These were the good days. Childishly unworried and awfully clingy. His voice is soft when he hums, and digs his chin a little deeper into the top of your head. “Not gonna sleep?”
“‘m trying,” you nod back, and nuzzle your face into his collarbones a little more. Your lashes brush the rough fabric of his shirt each time you blink, and shuffle, before eventually the hand creeps up to lovingly pet along your hairline. Vash’s eyes are half lidded when you dare to cast a glance upwards, but even the slightest bit of light gives them a warm, impossible shimmer. It’s home, and you find yourself clinging onto him a little tighter. The only sense of comfort you can allow yourself when the rest of the ship still feels so hostile, and you two- foreign.
“What are you thinking about?” he whispers, and even in your childlike innocence, it takes you aback a little. There’s only a few things you can think of that keep you up at night, right? Worries you and him share, should both be concerned about. You never bring it up, though. Because he doesn’t either, and what big brother says, goes. But you are not nearly as unaware as a child of your age should be. And you worry about tomorrow. If Luida and Brad decide to kick you two out at one point, if… 
No, when Nai niichan returns from his shallow grave. And you know he will. It’s only a matter of time.
“Can’t I come with you tomorrow?” His embrace is just tight enough to make you believe the promise you make every time you go to bed. “Everyone else but never each other,” you parrot, dutifully searching for his other hand to link your fingers with, “right?”
Vash stares for a moment longer, before a smile comes up onto his lips. It doesn’t reach his eyes. “That’s right.” We can lose everyone else. You’ve always believed your big brother. Trusted him implicitly, and without second thought, always. But for the first time in years, your throat closes up a little as your fingers tighten into fists of his shirt, and your desperate grip on him seems to be failing you. There’s no choice. There’s nothing else left to save.
+
Your head doesn’t hurt as much as you realistically know it should, when you come to. You groan, and your eyes slowly flick open to the sight of steam, and an intense heat that envelops you head to toe. The warmth of water all around your sore muscles is, by all accounts, a royal treat. Even the upper echelon has a hard time getting enough water to run a bath— and it splashes all around as you right yourself in the bath and try to come to. The first thing you notice is the shape of someone hovering near the doorway, and you wrap your arms around your upper body with a sneer.
Nai’s light hair is longer than it used to be. Of course, you don’t remember that much of the lean, skittish boy he used to be way back when, but you had pictures of the years you were too young to remember any more vividly. And when Vash died- when he left you- you barely got a glimpse of Nai before he vanished back into thin air.
The water is hot enough to make everything feel languid and soft and you have to fight yourself a little to raise an arm out of the water to go and grab for a towel. One that Nai snatches out of your reach, tossing it instead over the sink with a little lift of his brow. “Don’t be a brat. You probably haven’t had a bath in years, don’t act like you don’t enjoy it.”
You have no smart quip back to that, because you do of course, and instead let out a long breath. “Did you undress me?” Your eyes slide just quickly along his form-fitting white suit before tightening your arm around yourself. Along with your legs crossing, your spine straightens as he keeps his eyes on you too intently.
“It’s nothing I haven’t seen before when we were kids.”
Your dry chuckle fills the room only just. “It’s not the same as when we were kids, niisan. Not even close.” If he actually considers that fact, he sure doesn’t show it on his face, and the silence grows even tighter and more tense as you wait. After a few uncomfortable seconds, Nai turns his back on you to open the door.
“Vash, she’s awake.” If anything, that’s worse. You’d much rather spend another uncomfortable eternity stewing in your disdain for the eldest, than have to face Vash right now. But Nai doesn’t care, of course— and the slight shuffle outside of the large bathroom makes you want to sink into the water and resist the urge to come up for air. The two switch spots, and then the door is closed, and you’re trapped here again.
He calls your name so gently you almost think you imagine it, but it still tickles all the way up your spine with longing. And anger, and regret, all balled into a mess that is at risk of spilling over again at any moment. “How are you feeling?” His voice breaks the bubble. And you look to him despite everything, because you’re nothing if not trained to rely on him. It’s all you’ve ever known, and being betrayed doesn’t make that habit any easier to swallow. “Are you still hurting?” His cheeks are flushed over as he crouches down, and shuffles a little closer to the edge of the bathtub.
“Stop patronizing me, Vash. I don’t want your help.” You might say that, but you and him both know better. He says it out of genuine worry. The only problem is, you don’t want his fucking worry. You want him to plead for your forgiveness and explain and give you reasons to forget that you’re upset. You want his crocodile tears to wash away the fact that you’re hurting— and as long as you don’t get any of that, how can you forgive? His fingers reach out to grip along the back of your head and feel, and though you feel a very slight soreness, it’s mainly the casual way he touches you that sets you off. “Get your hands off of me.”
And then you’re crying, pulling up your nose against the wetness spilling out of your stupid, childish expression- and Vash, as he always does, goes even more familial and comforting. “Oh, my little girl, shhh- it’s okay. I’m so sorry, I am, c’mere.” He tosses his sweater aside to stand and move you out of the deepest part of the bath and makes room for himself, kicks off his socks, and slides in behind you. Uncaring about the fact that he’s in a shirt and boxers, he comes into the hot water and pulls you right back into him, and you don’t have the willpower to do anything but let him. “Big brother’s got you, shhh, shhh. I’m right here.”
You hate that it is comforting. You hate that you like the closeness.
And in the way you turn to press your face to his cheek, or how his arms fit around your curled up position in his lap, there’s a soft press between your brows that he fills with gentle kisses, where he runs his mechanical hand along the length of your thigh over and over again. And when you look up at him, Vash’s baby blues glint over, and he dips his head to be even closer to you. Close enough to feel his breathing on your face, and- have his lips pressing against your mouth. He lingers, knocks his forehead with yours, before the warmth returns and stays, and this time it heats your body up from the inside out.
“Niichan,” your voice breaks the silence, and he wraps his arms even tighter around you. Uncaring of the fact that you’re, his smallest sibling, is naked in his lap. Or well— you don’t dare think of any other option for his prodding and touching, happy to just live and let live for now. You’ve never been entirely ordinary in this world, after all, and… by virtue of proximity, it’s so easy to fall back into the role of the all adoring little sister. The press of his hips under yours is distracting when he shuffles, but eventually starts kissing down your neck.
“I never meant to leave you, I promise. Nai came to find me- and he forced me to join- I wanted to look for you, I swear, I went back- but Nai thought you wouldn’t … forgive him- and that you’d only be in more danger.” It goes in one ear and out the other. All you know is that your skin is so cold wherever his hands leave their traces, and that you don’t want him to stop touching you. You want him to say it. “Please forgive me. Please. I am so sorry.” His eyes are always so pretty when they’re aimed your way.
+
The bed sheets are cold when you land on top of them, Vash climbing over your body and running his lips down your neck and chest all the way down your belly. There’s something so high and out-of-this-world about the way he touches you, and clings to you, and you want to drown in it more than anything. But there’s just the one problem— He tosses the towels aside, and squeezes the soft plush of your thighs as he kisses you and his tongue opens your mouth again. “S- Love me,” he breathes into the kiss, before growling when your leg hooks around his thighs to pull him closer, “say you love me.”
The one problem that rears it’s ugly head as you watch your brother grab at your waist and scan your naked body before him like you’re just anyone- like- Your breathing hitches, and you shake your head. “No, no no no, wait, niichan.” You barely got a second to come to terms with the fact that you’re near him again, and barely one more to have him descending on you- that you didn’t stop for a second to think. This is your brother, and as much as your body might lie and say that it’s not so bad, you know better. He knows better. “Vash nii, no, we can’t. We can’t.” Your breathy moans of his name aren’t enough, and dragging a hand through his hair and tugging for good measure isn’t either.
He’s already panting and flushed above you, and tastes your mouth again as he spreads your thighs. “Oh, come on, imouto, please. Just lay back, lay back for me.” You try to push at his shoulder, but he only presses back harder, and stares at the point between your two bodies. Where his hard cock is dripping pre and the tip flushed red between his muscular thighs. It makes your tongue squirm in your mouth, as the cold glass of his hand comes to grip your jaw and he kisses and moans and does all of it without thinking. “Please, little sister, it’s been so long. I’ve missed you so much.”
His body lowers to yours, having his hard cock now brushing the top of your dripping pussy, heartbeat jackhammering against your ribcage like crazy. What is wrong with you? You know this can’t happen, know that the right thing to do is to shove him off and go to bed, but your body is so hot. He’s hot too, and so much different from what you knew him as— it fucks with your brain. Like a willfully forgiving haze that suffocates any sane thought. “Couldn’t get off without you, for five whole years,” he breathes, and kisses you, running his tongue along your ear and down your neck, “couldn’t do anything. I only wanted my little sister. Always- always wanted you.”
His other hand comes to trace random shapes on your tits, just barely brushing your nipples until they’re peaked and you have a cold shiver roll down your spine. “Don’t you want to be one with your big brother? Hm?” You do. Your arms instinctively reach up to wrap yourself around his back and feel his heartbeat against yours, larger shape basically crushing you into the bed. But it’s okay, and the way he rolls his hips against your waist, cockhead kissing the sloppy, needy entrance of your cunt- feels so fucking good. You can’t. Your head is shaking ‘no’ even though he pants your name and lines up to slide the swollen, ruddy tip between your bottom lips.
“We can’t, we can’t, niichan. It’s not right.”
“Shhh,” he squeezes your face before kissing you again, then flicking your nipples between expert fingers until your pussy is basically sucking him in itself, and your trembling legs slot over his calves. “I’d never want to leave my baby sister behind, how could you even think that.” The breathy admission is paired with a sloppy kiss above your heart, before he sucks the soft of your tit into his mouth and laves his tongue over your peaked bud. Then his hips roll again, and with a soft hiss, his heavy, hot cock slides into you. You should fight. You should run out of here. Should’ve never tried to find Nai to begin with.
But you moan as his heat fills your walls and he bucks slowly into you with unadulterated adoration, and tug at his blond head of hair for support. “Niichan, Vash niichan, no, no, y- can’t be inside me. Get out~” The out sounds more like a moaned ‘aw’, as his cock slides inside inch by inch and stretches you.
It aches. Every touch is more heated than the last one, and your nails automatically dig into the skin of his back as he bottoms out and tries to settle in your heat, tight little pussy barely big enough to fit all of him. Your eyes flick up to his face, and he laughs a little absentmindedly when you tear up. “Oh, fuck, you’re so tight. M- fucking my baby sister’s pussy- holy shit. I’m gonna move, m’kay?” It hurts and stretches you inside in a way that shouldn’t feel good, but it does, it does, you want to cry. He kisses sloppily onto your mouth and cheek, before groaning, “m’gonna -fuck.” The lewd sound of your cunny squelching as he pulls back and grabs himself at the base, pushing back in with a long moan— it’s so much.
But you’re entranced, totally sky-high with the way he looks above you, and over you. “Ah, ah, ah, nii~chan, I can’t, I-” you struggle to stay still under so much pleasure, hips jerking and your entire body pulling taught like a bow. “Vash nii~” Ever devoted, he blushes and groans your name and whispers to you, sliding in and out of you and pushing your thighs open further. With each pump, you’re a little further gone. With each pump, he seems to fill more of you, making your pussy drip all over the fancy, soft sheets. Your hands reach back to fist into the satin when he lays a final kiss onto your mouth, and rights himself to drape one of your legs over his shoulder, using his body weight to fuck harder and deeper— every pap, pap, pap sliding the bed back and forth in the dark.
And you choke on it, on your tears and spit and all the words that don’t make it out of your mouth; it keeps your head in a blissful cloud. One that has you slicking all over his cock as he fucks in and out, with rapid, rhythmic abandon. He’s so pretty. He’s so fucking pretty, is all you can think as he hoists your hips up with a hum and grinds his cock slower and deeper against your plush walls. “Oh, f-look at that. I can see myself through your belly, baby. Fu—ck.” It’s true. When you look down, he’s pressing on a little pouch that looks more raised than it should, and the push makes your pussy clench even harder around him.
“Niichan, n-niichan- that feels weird. S-stop.” He doesn’t, and the high blush on his cheeks and ears goes even more flushed when his eyes meet yours and he goes to wipe the tracks on your cheeks away.
“S’okay. I’m gonna take care of you, I swear ‘t. Ack, you’re so pretty, so fucking good.” His hand goes to change grip on your lifted thigh, while the other rubs sloppy circles at the top of your needy pussy until you can’t take it anymore. Your legs lock around him, and you grab at him arm in order to slow him down, but he simply shakes you off and spits onto your pussy for good measure. “You can cum, it’s okay. Big brother’s cock feels good in here, right? In that tight, little pussy. Go ahead and cum, cum for me. I know you want to,” the words barely come in, only the way your feet tremble and your muscles go even tighter.
You’re clenching so hard around him he has to fight to keep up the solid rhythm of his thrusts, and moaning, and throwing your head back as your nails drag down his arm. “I- I’m cl- oh god, I wanna cum with you, niichan—” you cry out with a tiny voice, getting shut up by your own hand slapping over your mouth at the terrible admission. But it lingers in the air as his fingers speed up more, rubbing that puffy nub until your vision goes black and white and the tightly wound coil in your belly snaps. “Vash nii~chan- I love you, I lo-love you. Please,” your voice dies, letting Vash fuck you through your orgasm as your toes curl and thighs shake and he jackhammers his cock inside you.
He heaves you off the bed into his arms before you’re even done to have your arms around his neck, and matching hysterical heartbeats thumping against each other, as he kisses at your temple. “I know, I know, I know, baby. Niichan’s gonna give you what you want, hm? And then you’ll say thank you, and I’ll fuck you again.” The kiss is sloppy when it finds your mouth, tongue taking more than you can give in your current situation. “Oh, I’m gonna fuck you again, hang on- shit, c-cumming. Love yo-mouto, love you, m’filling you up.”
As he moves your body up and down on his thick, slicked up cock like a doll, you can’t control the slick that runs down your thighs or the ruined expression— just that you cling onto him as the last twitches of your soft walls wrap around him like it’ll keep him right beside you.
With a last few punishing thrusts, all the hot cum from your big brother’s fat balls fills up your insides, pumping you full to the brim with heat. But you barely get a second to come down before he lets you back into the bed, and turns you over so you’re onto your knees, and his cold fingers push inside to plug you up a little more. “Gonna breed this little baby sister pussy, hah. That’s okay with you, right? I promise I’ll make it feel good, imouto.”  
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rootbeerworshiper · 2 months
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Summer (part 2/3)
Reader x Matt Sturniolo
summery: Summer camp has always been your favourite thing, but as you enter you last year at the camp, as a councillor, you meet someone that changes everything.
warnings: so long omg sorry LMAO, mention of suicide, just so much fluff
alsooooo definitely accidentally posted this when i had already written like half of it and i’ve been writing it while it’s private so it will most likely be far down on my page hahah
part 3 here
love, sienna <3
surprisingly you slept well last night—between the noisy children and Matt intruding your every thought, you weren’t sure it was possible.
you can’t get him out of your mind, his eyes, his sudden kindness—his hands.
yeah you were obsessed with some guys hands, that’s how perfect he is.
camp is only a week long, which doesn’t really leave you enough time to muster up enough courage to actually do anything with him—but that does not mean you won’t be thinking about it.
he’s the kind of person that has so many layers, like a complex character in a novel—you just want to know everything about him.
looking at him is nice too—you can’t get the image of him by the fire out of your mind.
never in your life did you think you’d become so infatuated with someone who’s currently avoiding juvie, but here you were, journaling every waking thought you have about him.
normally you’d tell Amara, but for whatever reason a part of you wants to keep Matt to yourself. he’s the one thing in your life that makes you interesting and the moment Amara sees him you’re sure he’ll switch his gaze towards her—most boys do.
maybe you were interested in Matt purely because he approached you first, another thing that usually happens to your best friend.
whatever it was, it’s slightly embarrassing.
the two of you had one civil conversation and you’re already head over heels.
as much as you’d love to sit here and daydream about Matt, you are a councillor and you do have a job to do.
so you muster up the energy at 7:30am to wake up all the kids as they begin to get ready for breakfast.
you yourself also have to get ready, which feels like a task in it self because now you had something to look good for—well you had someone.
taking out your braids from the day prior, you brush through your curls that are now more defined than usual.
you’re grateful they aren’t frizzy, the world being on your side for once in your life.
a mental battle ensues on whether or not you should apply makeup. normally you wouldn’t. you usually don’t even pack any, but for the time being you’ll do anything to be more desirable, especially next to Amara.
the kids are finally ready and so are you, now just wearing your red councillor t-shirt and white linen shorts that you thrifted a while ago, along with a few bracelets you had made at prior years at camp.
you along with the campers put on your shoes before walking outside, the feeling of your black converse sinking into the gravel that resides outside your cabin combined with the smell of the morning brought you serenity that was truly incomprehensible.
with that you begin the walk to the dining hall once more, trying to avoid rubbing your sleepy eyes as to not smear your freshly applied mascara.
the menu for breakfast consisted of scrambled eggs and french toast which had your kids jumping up and down at the thought of.
you were just grateful that councillors were allowed coffee in the morning—maybe you didn’t sleep as well as you thought. it was hard to tell how much of the dreaming you were awake for.
instinctively, you look around for familiar faces. you and Amara hadn’t really spoken last night after the fire, just a goodnight text and her saying that she has to catch you up on her life—she always does.
its clear when you spot Amara she has a pounding headache, you have a talent for telling when she’s hung over—and yet she still looks like she’s straight off the runway.
you don’t know why your thoughts of jealousy had gotten so bad recently, but for whatever reason it was overtaking you.
there’s no time to look around for Matt as you begin placing food onto your paper plate, asking the kitchen staff for a coffee with cream and sugar.
momentarily you forget about him, caught up in the mess your campers were making and smiling as they grin ear to ear alongside you.
that is until you see him again. somehow he got more beautiful.
you could tell that he was also tired by the way he rubbed the sleep out of his eyes and sipped on his coffee, but nonetheless you were infatuated with him.
something about the way he was so incredibly good with kids caused your heart to do actual backflips. it’s hard to even tell he was forced to be here from the way he lets the kids tease him and pull on his clothes.
the sight is too funny not to laugh at but the moment his eyes meet yours from across the room your focus changes to your plate.
it was probably incredibly obvious how obsessed with him you were, and you were sure he’s used to it.
the itinerary for the day is basically every activity you can think of, including rock climbing, archery, arts and crafts, swimming and more.
the way it all works is that two cabins are paired together and each day they complete two of many activities.
you knew that your activities were rock climbing and crafts, but you weren’t sure what cabin you would be paired with.
the camp leader begins to list the pairings, and slowly, there is less options for you to be put with.
“and lastly councillors y/n and councillor Matt’s cabins will be paired!” the leader says enthusiastically.
you weren’t sure how you felt about this.
sure, you can spend more time with the boy you can’t get off of your mind, but on the other hand you fear the more time you spend with him, the more likely you are to scare him away.
so for a moment you’re anxiety kicks in, thinking about what your going to say to Matt, how to not make a fool of yourself in front Matt, or how-
Matt.
you’re eyes meet his once more. now lingering longer than before.
he’s the first to break the eye contact, chuckling to himself as he begins to assist his campers in putting everything away.
butterflies enter your stomach immediately, one small smile from him is all that it took.
as much as you’d love to stay in this spot forever, watching him, you have to assist your own campers with their sticky plates and interesting questions.
once everyone has poured out of the dining hall and into the open area, the cabins are split into their respective groups.
you don’t say anything to Matt at first, paralyzed by the fear of making it awkward, so you just sort of… stand next to each other.
“how’d you sleep?” he asks, catching you off guard as you bring your gaze towards him.
he’s not much taller than you, maybe two inches or so, but you still had to look up slightly to make eye contact.
somehow, you muster up the courage to speak. “it was okay, kids were pretty loud till like midnight and then i got asked about 4 times to walk people to the bathroom so you know” you kick the rocks beneath your feet, looking down at them to avoid eye contact. “you?”
“it was pretty weird sleeping in a room full of ten year old boys so not a lot of sleeping happened for me” you both look up to see that it’s time to head to your activities, the first of which being rock climbing.
as councillors you didn’t have to actually rock climb, just assisting the kids in getting their gear on and such.
other than a few stolen glances between you and Matt, nothing really happens, and there’s not enough time inbetween kids climbing for anymore small talk.
after every kid has gone, you’re about to begin heading over to the craft area when one of Matt’s campers speaks. “Matt and y/n you should do a rock climbing race!” he says enthusiastically, earning cheers of agreement from practically every other camper.
you and Matt immediately look to one another and before you can even say no to the kid he smiles. “sure, it’ll be fun” your breath practically hitches at his words but you’re in no position to say no.
so you swallow your pride. “okay sure. Matt you are so on”
the two of you walk over as the station leader assists you into your harnesses. “you’re all set” she smiles at you.
as you and Matt lined yourselves up you were met with an abundance of cheers from the campers.
the one leader now speaks again, this time counting down. “on your mark”
you look to Matt and he has the cheesiest smile on his face, one you haven’t been able to witness until now.
“get set”
he looks back to you, but doesn’t hold the eye contact long as he looks back up at he wall ahead, and you do the same—it’s unlike you to lose to a boy because you’re too busy staring at him.
“go!” she waves her hand dramatically as you and the boy to your left begin climbing up the wall.
rock climbing was one of your favourite activities growing up at camp, and up until this point you hadn’t lost a race to anyone.
so here you are, putting in your full effort as you scale the wall, Matt continuing to keep up with you.
this goes on for a moment longer until you go and reach for the bell at the top, feeling victorious.
the feeling doesn’t last long because another hand comes into your line of sight, reaching for the same string.
you tied.
ten years of winning every race and you’ve now tied for the first time.
the bell rings and everyone below you cheers as you look to Matt—it’s hard to be mad at anyone that looks that good. “good game” you say as you begin to make your way down the wall, reaching your hand out to shake his.
he reaches for your hand and does the same. “same to you” you try your best to avoid the way his hand makes you want to melt, focusing now and getting down to the grass that awaits you below.
_______________________________________________
the rest of the day is pretty standard, and after arts and crafts you had new beaded bracelets to add to your growing collection.
dinner goes smoothly too, and by the evening the kids have full control over what they wish to do before lights out.
this gives you a chance to talk to Amara, which is something you feel like you haven’t done in forever. the two of you are sitting at the dock by the lake, watching the sun set as you talk about everything that’s happened so far.
“i don’t know why you won’t peruse anything with him he sounds perfect for you” you groan.
she’s now filled you in on the older camp councillor from last night, and it’s safe to say you were growing more annoyed with her inability to commit to a guy, especially one as good as the councillor.
“he gave me the ick i don’t know” she ponders for a moment, gaze still fixated on the scenery that surrounds you. “wait how was it doing the activities with that weird kid?”
you furrow your eyebrows, not entirely sure who she’s referring to. “Matt?”
“yeah that’s his name” she replies smiling as if the idea of him is just that funny.
it’s hard to not feel a little sting, but you’re used to this, you and her have very different taste in guys. “i don’t know why you think he’s weird, he’s pretty nice actually”
“i don’t know he always looks angry at something and like i’ve never seen him not wearing a long sleeve it’s just odd”
now you’re definitely annoyed. normally you’d play along just to get her to stop talking, but for whatever reason you feel the need to stick up for Matt—maybe it’s because you aren’t sure anyone else would.
“you don’t know anything about him Amara you shouldn’t be judging him over nothing” you reply with a harsher tone than you were really expecting.
“why do you care so much? do you have a crush on the kid or something?”
yup you sure do.
but Amara doesn’t deserve to know that, not when she’s acting like this.
so you just get up, replacing yourself with your feet on the slightly wobbly dock.
you open your mouth to say something but ultimately decide against it, the last thing you want to do is speak out of anger and regret it the next morning.
“y/n i didn’t mean it like that i’m sorry” she calls out but you continue walking towards your cabin in a fit of anger.
_______________________________________________
it doesn’t make a ton of sense why you were so offended by her words. deep down you knew there was more of Matt for you to learn about, more backstory behind his complexity and you couldn’t judge him without it.
you shower quickly, although you hate the camp showers with a passion. all you can do is be as fast as possible and pray no bugs join you in the stall.
once you’ve dried off fully you change into some random boxers you own and your moms old crew neck that you brought with you everywhere.
it brought you closure wearing it, having a physical way to feel close to her was needed in your time of grief.
the campers all settle in to their bunks and you drown out their talking as you return to your book from earlier.
usually reading was an escape from your life, a way to forget—now as you read you can’t help but wish these romantic things were happening to you.
it’s too much.
so you attempt to sleep, putting the bookmark on a page that brought you particular sadness and letting out a huge sigh as your head meets the pillow.
you wish it was easy to turn your fast moving brain off, but it’s a battle that you know all too well—a battle you lose every time.
so once it’s clear that all the campers are asleep, you make your way out of the cabin, tip toeing as much as possible and quietly picking up your slides.
you squeeze your eyes as the door creaks ever so slightly and pause as you await a reaction, but nothing happens, so you continue out.
the moment you shut the door behind yourself you take a few breath. if only breathing was enough to shut off your mind.
you bend over to slide on your shoes and you begin to walk to the dock, hoping to gain some peace and serenity while you watch the stars.
it’s a short walk and soon enough you find yourself at the same spot you fought with Amara at hours prior, and the thought of the fight alone makes you feel sick.
you’re unsure of how it got this bad with her. it’s not like you actively hated her or anything, she’s still your favourite person. but something in the way you continuously watch her reject guys just to disprove at the one guy that actually looks like at you like you’re human makes you really upset.
camp used to be so different. always filled with lifelong memories, but you want nothing more than to forget what happened tonight.
you wipe the tear that’s creeps on to your face and lay down, knees bent and your hands on your stomach—having your hands placed there is something Amara taught you to do when your brain moves too fast for your breath to keep up.
the use of that strategy is ironic now.
after a few short moments you hear footsteps behind you—there is no way you are ready to talk to Amara yet, not when you still feel like shit.
“Amara i don’t wanna speak to you right now please leave me alone” you call out without looking behind yourself.
the footsteps pause for a moment so you assume you’ve successfully caused your best friend to walk away, but you’re met with a voice that is all too familiar.
“i’m not Amara”
Matt.
the footsteps continue as you look back to him. “mind if i sit here?”
you wipe your face quickly, the last thing you need is any more lingering tears left on your cheek and a boy to make fun of them. a quick nod of your head and he’s sat next to you, closer now than at the fire.
he’s the first to lay back now, in the exact position you were in before being interrupted. “do you wanna talk about it?”
you match his position on the dock, sighing to release all stress. “are you gonna get annoyed if i sit here and ramble about girl drama?” you knew it was more than that, but most people you have tried to confide in didn’t see it the way that you did.
“i think calling it girl drama just undermines the pain you’re clearly in” his gaze is fixed on the stars but you can’t help but look to him.
“that was a big word for you” you smile slightly and earn a shake of the head in return—it’s clear he’s hiding a smile you just aren’t sure why. “but yeah uh i kinda fought with Amara in this exact same spot like a few hours ago”
you pause. it feels extremely weird to be confiding in someone who was a stranger to you yesterday but somehow he feels like the only person in the world who will listen.
“she just said some mean shit about this guy that i’m into as if she doesn’t shut down every guy that looks at her. and i wish i had her problem, i do. but it doesn’t come that easy for me, guys don’t usually look at me that way”
“and this one does?” he asks, looking at you as if on cue.
you fight the stupid smile that creeps onto your lips. “he does”
it’s silent for a moment again, you aren’t really sure how to continue this conversation.
“you’re telling me no guys are into you?” he asks. as much as you wish the words didn’t have the effect on you that they did, sadness looms over you once more.
“that’s exactly what i’m telling you. they all look to Amara before i can even get a word in. i’m used to it now, but it’s still a hurtful reality check that my life isn’t one i read about.” once again you were unsure why you were being so open with Matt, you had never said these words out loud before, something about him made it flow so effortlessly.
he sighs at this, as if the sadness that looms over your head has travelled to his. “i don’t see what everyone sees in Amara. i prefer the other friend”
you just laugh. “that’s funny” as confident as you were that he was joking, his face is dead serious. your eyebrows furrow in disbelief. “wait you’re serious?”
“way to make it a thing” he laughs but you can’t even begin to imagine what you’re meant to say in return in order to continue the flirty banter—god where was Amara when you needed her.
“wait why did you sit next to me yesterday at the fire? i thought you hated me” you muster up the courage to speak.
he clears his throat slightly and you can tell he’s uncomfortable. “i never hated you. i was just mad that my parents sent me here. i sat next to you because i thought you were pretty, it’s really not complicated.”
you allow your jaw to drop at this. to most people this may be a normal occurrence, but for someone as hot as Matt to be hitting on you is not something you could prepare yourself for.
he looks to you and you immediately cover your face with your hands—you were flustered over nothing.
the last thing you expected him to do was gently remove your hands from your cheeks. “this isn’t gonna work if you’re terrified of compliments”
“sorry i’m not used to it” his hands are still holding your own. “can i ask you something?”
he nods, not letting go.
“why do you always wear long sleeves?” you were expecting a more uncomfortable reaction from the boy, instead a smirk enters his face.
“you wanna see?” you could melt at the words but instead you nod as he lets go of your grasp.
he sits up and his hands grab the bottom hem of his hoodie and lift it over his head—momentarily exposing his stomach.
you can’t help but stare until he pulls his tank top down and places his hoodie to the side. “holy shit” is all you’re capable of saying. it’s unclear what you were anticipating but it definitely wasn’t this.
Matt’s right arm is completely covered in tattoos. from flowers on his shoulder to a seashell on his forearm he practically had a full sleeve.
you’re fully sat up now too, hesitantly reaching out to his arm to further inspect the ink that covers him. “you can touch my arm i won’t bite” he says, speaking more quiet than before, but it’s an offer you take up—grabbing the boys arm and tracing your fingers along the numerous tattoos.
the longer you graze his arm the more you can feel eyes burn though the top of your head, so without thinking you look up and your eye’s immediately meet his—now closer than ever before.
you fight every urge to back away and cringe of embarrassment, because deep down this is all you’ve thought about for the past 24 hours and now it’s real.
the eye contact lingers for a while, your arm still on his as the two of you practically breathe in sync.
“can i kiss you?” Matt asks and immediately you nod your head, unable to think about anything else.
he leans in and a sense of comfortability washes over you in the most unexpected way. as much as you lack experience, this feels so incredibly right.
you’re the first to deepen the kiss and his hand makes its way to your cheek—you could melt at the touch.
it’s something so simple but so intimate. your hand rubbing small circles on his arm while his fingers bring you impossibly closer to him.
as far as kisses go, you’re sure this is as good as it gets.
after a moment the two of you back away, looking into each others eyes immediately.
you can’t fight back the dumb smile that forms on your face, and for once, he doesn’t either.
he lays back down and you follow suit, now placing your head in his chest as his arm wraps around your waist. “i wish everyone saw you the way that i see you” you say—his one hand now making its way to your hair to toy with it as you speak.
“you want everyone to want to kiss me?” you smack his chest as he laughs.
“obviously not Matt” you sigh, sinking further into him. “i just mean like everyone sees you as this tough guy who doesn’t care about anything, but that’s not you at all”
“what am i then?” his voice is deeper now, more tired than you’ve heard him before.
your own arm wraps around his waist before you speak again, it still doesn’t feel real. “for starters, you love kids, i can tell. most councillors don’t put up with half the shit your cabin does to you but you just allow it and i don’t think it’s because you don’t care, i think it’s because you like to make them happy.”
he just hums in response. “you also care about other people. like when you saw me sitting alone, part of me just assumed you were coming to make fun of me but i think you just didn’t like seeing someone so social sit alone. and i saw the look in your eyes when i opened up to you. it wasn’t pity, it was empathy”
it’s easier to speak to him when you don’t have to look at him in the eyes, and with his hand in your hair guiding you through your words. “you just don’t let people see that side of you and i don’t understand why”
he shifts slightly in his spot—you definitely struck a nerve and you were not expecting to.
“you don’t have to uh tell me if you don’t want i get it if it’s personal” you say quickly, desperately trying to not ruin what has barely started.
“no it’s fine uh” he thinks for a second, fingers still gently scratching your scalp. “when i was younger i was the happiest kid, like you would never see me without a smile on my face. and uh i had this best friend, his name was Nate, and he was my everything growing up.” you can hear him sniffle above you and you subconsciously squeeze his tighter, wanting nothing more than to make the boy feel better.
“a little more than a year ago today i had to read his suicide note. everything in the world felt so unfair. i had to watch his family suffer and no words of comfort would fill the void that Nathan left. i guess uh since then i haven’t really been smiling a lot because i haven’t had much of a reason to.”
the thought of this made your heart hurt. “i’m sorry. i know what you’re feeling, i mean a little bit anyways. my mom was my best friend and it never felt like i got enough time with her. it’s terrifying how death happens so fast you know?”
he just nods in response, fighting back the lump in his throat as you speak. “one second i was watching The Office with her and laughing on the couch and the next i had to prepare a speech for her funeral. and you can never say enough in those few pages to encapsulate someone’s entire life. never”
you both feel a sense of heaviness as you sit in a more comfortable silence.
“what’s your favourite memory of Nate?” you ask, hoping to lighten the mood.
it seems to work because Matt immediately smiles. “it was in middle school and we went out to Mcdonald’s and decided to play the penis game.” he laughs softly. “we were practically just yelling the word penis in an almost empty restaurant and peeing ourselves over it” you laugh along too, the mere image of this is enough for you to find it funny.
“what’s your favourite memory of your mom?” he asks in return.
you think for a moment before landing on one specific one. “when i was 12 she taught me how to make her signature chocolate chip cookies. she was already diagnosed with cancer at that point and she was determined to leave her mark on the world in any way she could, including her many recipes. i didn’t know at the time that she was dying, and there was no way for me to. she was the happiest she had ever been and we had so much fun together, eating the chocolate chips while we waited for the cookies to bake”
“she sounds like a really good mom” he says, looking down at you.
“do you think we’re put on this earth for a reason?” you ask, you’re eyes now feeling heavy as you cuddle with Matt.
he takes a moment to respond. “i do. i just don’t know what mine is, or if we’re ever really supposed to have that figured out”
“it just sucks because currently, my reason to be on this earth is to be a supporting character in an interesting movie, and i don’t want that”
“so make your own movie” those words alone are enough for you to smile. you look up to him to see his eyes already on yours and you place a quick kiss on his lips.
“i like kissing you” you say sheepishly, both hands now under your own chin as you look up to him.
he smiles back.
knowing what you know now, the fact that he’s smiling at you—because of you, could make you melt.
“you should do it more often” he replies, looking at you with a new look in his eyes, one of admiration.
you didn’t see that look often, and when you did it was directed towards your best friend.
so you kiss him again. and again. and one more time for good measure. if you could, you’d be here forever, just like this.
“we should probably go back now, the sun looks like it’s about to start rising” you laugh. the last thing you want to do is leave but you don’t have much of a choice.
he sighs dramatically. “what if i just wanna stay here forever?”
you sit up now, looking down at him as you place a hand on his chest. “well that would simply be unrealistic”
it takes a lot for you to muster up the energy to stand up but you do, and you reach down to help the boy up.
the short walk to your cabin used to be a good thing, but seeing as you don’t want to leave the boy at your side, you’d be okay walking three miles to make it back.
you’re now at your cabin, directly outside of the door as you and Matt just stare at each other. neither of you want to leave, but you both know that this night needs to come to an end eventually.
he places his hands gently on your waist, almost as if he’s testing the waters, but by the way your arms immediately wrap around his neck he knows he made the right choice.
“goodnight Matt” you whisper in his ear, earning a simple “goodnight y/n” as he kisses your temple and inevitably lets you go.
you watch him walk away, screaming silently the moment he’s out of sight—fighting every urge in your body to jump up and down like one of your campers at the mere thought of tonight.
a/n: this feels so incredibly long but i finally finished part 2!! part 3 will be the longest one so if you didn’t get a snack for this chapter you’ll want one for the next
taglist: @inlovewithmattstur @lolasnoww-blog @tastesousweet @ivypoison @disturbedwoodelf @sturnswift @junnniiieee07 @ellie-luvsfics @sturnified @alicejwebster @s7urnfilms @madsdogst @justlivinglive @sluttycupsworld (some users didn’t work to add)
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