#taking the time to say this is a loving reminder that the shit loki does is UNEQUIVICABLY fucked up. no ifs ands or buts.
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// remind me to write some metas abt Loki tomorrow but in the meantime, i rewatched Thor. the most meta-y bits from me liveblogging it
#taking the time to say this is a loving reminder that the shit loki does is UNEQUIVICABLY fucked up. no ifs ands or buts.#he is still a very interesting character and while his reasoning may be understandable it is NEVER justified#i'll expand upon this later but i felt the need in my bones to remind of that esp since a lot of these msgs are me being emotional and -#- yelling in caps because he's an atrocious and fascinating little man#MUSE / Loki#STUDY / Loki#MUSING / Loki#━ ♔ shielding your eyes from the bright noon-light : studies.#marvel //#mcu //#violence //#death //#war //#ender dont look#religion //#racism //#<- cause thats what it is w him n the frost giants! even if its OBSCENELY normalized by everyone it Literally fucken is by definition!!!!!!#━ ♔ wanting like flesh knitting over a wound : xxx.#ask to tag //
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hi! i love fftsr and i really enjoy the dynamics between everyone and their personas so i wanted to ask how you decided to characterise the personas/their dynamics and if you had envisioned how the other thieves interact with their personas as well?
sorry if this question is weird 😭 keep up the good work!!
interesting question...
(uhhh I didn't think this would happen with this question but SPOILERS FOR UP TO CHAPTER 46 OF FFTSR)
To be honest, the ony dynamic that I put a real degree of thought into is the Akechi & Robin & Loki dynamic- I wanted neither persona to be entirely good or rational, or one side representative of 'being evil' or whatever. Akechi's problem, is that his thoughts, feelings, and ideas so often contradict eachother, and he is entirely unable to reconcile that. So even when Robin and Loki do agree, Akechi is more likely to ignore them than take thier advice.
Of course, just because I didn't put too much thought into it doesn't mean I'm pulling all the other dynamics out of my ass lmao:
Sumire takes second place for "Persona who talks the most"- Ella, for the most part, is a supportive force that also isn't afraid to call Sumire on her bullshit. Whether or not Sumi listens is another matter entirely. This sort of stems from how Sumire's third awakening is her final resolve to stand on her own, to reject Maruki's reality despite all it could give her, to be unapolagetically Sumire for the rest of her life- So her persona is a force to remind her of that vow, when she starts slipping into her anxieties and her tendency for avoidance.
Haru doesn't get a lot of POV scenes, but her awakening was very fun for me to write. Since I've taken Haru in a direction that is distinctly angry, I wanted Milady's words to reflect that anger at her circumstances, and the need to break from it.
Ren doesn't chat with Arsene often enough for me to remember much of what he says HAHA- he doesn't have the same influence on Ren's character the same way that Akechi and Sumire's persona's do. When he does talk, however, it's usually to quip or be a smartass- a trait which I've quietly yoinked from how people tend to characterise Arsene/Shadow Ren- as, simply, the essence of Joker.
And, now that Ren has also resolved the whole Crow situation, his dynamic with Metatron is pretty much that Metatron is a forceful reminder of the kind of thinking that got Ren to make poor descisions in the first place. Metatron often speaks up any time that Ren tries to justify taking Maruki's deal, spoken with all the snark and fury of the real Akechi.
Most of the PT haven't had POV scenes, but Futaba and Makoto certainly have!
For Futaba, any time Necronomicon speaks up is usually when Futaba is trying to avoid something. Stemming from her awakening, Futaba's vow to never allow lies to decieve her again is reflected in her persona, and especially when she tries to decieve herself.
For Makoto- I actually can't remember if Johanna has spoken in a previous chapter, or if she's going to speak in an upcoming one, but Johanna's shtick also stems from Makoto's awakening. Makoto's vow was to not be trampled by authority, to ensure that she can be herself even in a society that aims to push her in a box. Johanna will speak up if Makoto is becoming complacent, if she tries to take the easy way out.
Uhh that's pretty much it! For the other PT's personas, I would similarly draw from their awakenings to decide what I would want them to say. For the most part, though, everyone's personas start getting chatty when their wielders aren't being true to themselves.
FUCK I FORGOt about Maruki. HAHA I wrote Azathoth as being a cryptic peice of shit, mostly. That kind of 'cult leader talk' is the kind of shit he pulls in canon, and I saw no reason to change that.
Shadow Maruki, on the other hand, is a more true reflection of the man himself- an echo of who he was in the original timeline. Shadows and personas are two sides of the same coin, but how they present themselves does vary. They're archetypes, rather than a 1:1 of their wielder's personality.
aaand that's all I got! ty for the ask! <3 <3 <3
#asks#persona 5#fftsr#This was really fun to think about since I hadn't really thought about it before HAHA
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The Little Things
Pairing: Loki x Fem!Reader, Married couple
Plot:
We do not realise when the little things change the courses of our lives, of the relationships we hold dear, until there is nothing left but a painful void. Will Loki and his wife be able to fill this void again?
Warnings: Lots of angst but with a happy ending, nudity (non-sexual), long read.
Read time: ~43 mins
“How was dinner?” She asked as Loki settled down on the couch after a long night.
“Dinner was good. Everyone missed you.”
A dry chuckle accompanied the slight shake of her head. “I’m hardly anyone to be missed.”
With a sigh, Loki got off the couch and walked towards their bedroom. “I’m going to take a shower,” he said as he plucked some clothes from the wardrobe, and sauntered towards the bathroom.
Recent experience had taught him that no matter how hard he tried to convince her, the distance between them would only increase, the reason behind this aversion being unknown to him.
Their shared room, which was once filled with sounds of happiness and images of love, now witnessed tired eyes, frowning mouths, snarky remarks, distrust and tear-stained pillows. A perpetual gloom lingered in the air, soaking its residents in sadness everyday.
When things changed between them was a question hard to answer but it was easy to see, even with the foggiest eyes, what had changed between the two souls who had once been the elixir of each other’s life. It was probably the little things that were tossed away, once every month and eventually once every week, into the abyss of resentment, until that abyss became full enough, strong enough to consume them like a large, looming black hole.
We all believe that some things are better swept away under the rug, don’t we? Some small, apparently inconsequential things that are better pushed out of sight, although our hearts are well aware of the dirt plaguing the house. It is not until the rug starts rotting and the air becomes unbreathable that we realise the things that we have done.
But sometimes, there is no turning back.
By the time Loki came out of the bathroom, (Y/N) was already tucked snugly under the comforter, with her back towards him. The slow rise and fall of her body told him that she was asleep. A frown settled on his face as he got under the covers. Like every night, he wanted to reach out and touch her arm soothingly. He wanted to gently hold her waist, turn her towards him and hug her tight. Or maybe simply wrap himself around her while his chest felt her heartbeat through her back. And just like every night, he stared at her with disappointed eyes from afar, he waited, and then turned to face away from her, hoping that Sleep would find him soon.
What he never knew was that she longed for the same things. He didn’t know that every night she wished him to hold her, to kiss her head. And that she was wide awake all the while he was pining for her.
But the mighty invisible wall that had grown between them prevented any feelings from passing across, not even to Loki’s magical mind that could once hear her thoughts from across the house.
Morning came with the usual rays of sunshine trying to invade their space through the gaps in the curtains. The only exception was that it was a weak invasion; the sky was bleak because of the clouds travelling across it.
By the time they both woke up, it had started to drizzle. At the breakfast table, as they silently sipped on tea, they heard the rain falling in torrents outside.
“Shit!” She stomped her foot. “Why does it always have to rain when it’s time to go to work?”
Loki chuckled. Although the air always seemed to be thick, there were some moments when old habits and old love found their ways through the creaks.
It surprised her, needless to say. But it also triggered a small shot of happiness in her chest. That sound! That beautiful melody that used to brighten up the gloomiest of days! She realised that it still had the same effect on her. But the reminder of the long gone days lended a sad touch to the episode.
“What?” She inquired with a small smile.
“Nothing.” It was evident that Loki was trying to hide a laugh behind his cup of tea. He could shield his lips from view but not the sparkle in his eyes.
“Tell me, please.”
“No, it is just…nothing important,” he simply replied.
He had thought that she was no longer interested in being a part of his humour or his mischief which she had sometimes remarked as “getting on her nerves”. What he did not realise was that those were just some hard days, and that she missed his snarky comments badly. She hated the way he kept everything to himself - all the joy and the grief, especially the latter.
As usual, her heart urged her to keep poking him until he laughed his thoughts out. But that invisible wall which time had created forbade her to step forward.
“Alright,” she concluded in a small, disappointed voice, and focused on her plate.
Loki caught that tone - the lingering disappointment that now pervaded every line or word she uttered. He had once tried to shake the grey thoughts out of her. He had pleaded, urged, even quarrelled. But given that most of the time the truth led to more arguments, she had started burying everything inside her. And the wall started growing thicker.
But something stirred in him this time. He decided to drop the mask at least once.
“I…It is just that,” Loki let his guard down a little, “you look…um…cute when you do that…when you stomp your feet.”
His words hit her like a train. Sweet compliments, Loki opening up his heart - these were things that she only dreamt of now.
“Well, I…I mean… ” While she fumbled with thoughts, emotions and words, Loki saw through her turmoil and caught her..
“Remember you had once stomped on my feet?”
The memory instantly produced a soft laugh in the back of her throat. “That was an accident! And it’s not like you felt anything. You simply feigned hurt.”
“I may be a god but those pointy heels can hurt the toughest of beings, mind you!”
“No way!” She laughed a little more this time. “It was just one of your little dramas.”
His eyes suddenly lost the spark as they lowered towards the floor. “Yes… my… things that you dislike,” he sighed and gave an awkward, painful smile.
The kitchen was again filled with nothing but the patter of the rain and the clanks of the cutlery.
Shifting uncomfortably in her seat, Y/N made attempts to say something - anything that would alleviate the pain that they both bore. But no line seemed to be the right one.
Tired of measuring every word every single time, she decided to drop the facade. If it led to a fight, then let it. At least they would get to talk, to vent out the toxins or whatever has been building up inside.
“I never disliked your dramas,” she confessed. “Or your mischievous…whatnots.”
“I clearly remember you telling me more than once that my pranks irritated you,” although Loki’s voice was low there was a hint of an edge to it.
“Those were some rough days, Loki! And I have explained this to you a million times!” Her emotions had started to crawl towards the brink.
Loki still did not meet her pleading eyes. He let out a dry laugh. “Several rough days you’ve had then.”
They were spiralling down the hole again, she realised. It wasn’t something that she could bear any longer. And somewhere deep down she knew that Loki hated it, too. She felt her eyes starting to get moist but, over the months, her pride had swelled large enough to forbid her from showing her “weaker” side before him.
So, she decided to do what she thought was the best thing to do in that situation: leave the room. She got up and started gathering her unfinished breakfast to put them in the bin.
“Finish your breakfast,” Loki called as soon as she laid her hands on her plate. “Please.”
“I’m not hungry,” her voice was shaking with effort to hold the dam of emotions.
“Please, (Y/N),” Loki got up from his chair and strode towards her. “Please do not do this to yourself. Please do not do this to me!”
“To you?” Her voice had started cracking as her vision became blurry with tears. “Do you think I enjoy this? This… being depressed all the time, not talking to you, not experiencing our bittersweet banter, seeing our happy times burn away, seeing our love getting swallowed by whatever is going on in here?”
“I do not enjoy it either!” He shouted, only to drop down to a whisper, “I do not enjoy it either.”
She stayed transfixed, anticipating the bitter flow of conversation that had just poked its head again into their once loving home.
“(Y/N),” Loki advanced towards her, “I…I do not want any of these!”
Her voice was barely above a whisper, “You do not want me?”
“No! No! I could…I could never think of that. Of us! … I do not want whatever has been happening between us. This…distance. This sadness. This…wall that has formed between us. I do not like this, (Y/N). I…”
His voice trailed off but his eyes remained fixed on hers, waiting for a reply, hoping.
This was the first time in several months that one of them had opened up. They did, initially, show their vulnerable side, and it even helped to douse the fire but eventually pride got the better of them. And all truth, all hurt were swept under that thick layer of nothing but falsity.
When Loki did not receive any response from her save teary eyes and shaky breaths, he took a few more steps towards her.
“I am tired, (Y/N). I am exhausted! I want us back. Can you help me, please? Wha-What happened between us? We were so… And now… I hate this, (Y/N)! It hurts me. All the time… And I know that you hurt, too. So, can we just…drop this…whatever this is? Can we…”
“Believe me, I’ve been wanting to drop this every single day!” She finally confessed amid tears flowing down her cheeks and onto her blouse. “I just…I didn’t think that you’d be…”
Feelings and tears both flowed out without any barriers this time. Words were exchanged; some led to anxiety while some soothed the burns.
The torrent outside had eased down to a drizzle. And so had the situation inside the house.
“Say,” Loki took a deep breath, “how would you like…uh…going for…dinner tonight?”
A small chuckle escaped her, followed by a sniffle, “I would…like that. But I don’t think the weather would. I mean, look at it.” She gestured a hand towards the window.
“I could teleport us,” Loki humoured.
“Or…we can drive through the rain. It would be nice, I think.” She nodded as she recalled the many times they had gone for a drive whenever it got cloudy or rainy.
“Romantic, I dare say!” His eyes brightened up.
“Yes…maybe.”
“I was thinking,” Loki hesitated slightly before continuing, “let’s take the day off. It’s late already, and…”
“And?” She looked at him with hopeful eyes, wondering if he’d say the words aloud.
“And,” he wet his lips, “we would get some time with each other…some much needed time, … I think.”
A tiny satisfactory smile cracked through her lips. “Are you sure? We might kill each other if we spend the entire day under one roof!”
“Oh! Do not overestimate yourself, darling!”
‘Darling’! She vaguely remembered the last time he had used his favourite nickname for her. ‘Darling’! Loki himself was surprised at how smoothly it flowed past his lips. ‘Darling.’ His darling.
Perhaps these uninhibited surprises were what they needed to break the ice.
“Okay,” she nodded hopefully, “let’s see.”
Evening was welcomed on a peaceful note. Of course, that is if you would call quietude ‘peaceful’. Neither spoke much, afraid to let words take control. Verbal communication had, somehow, turned from being the cause of attraction to the cause of all troubles.
When (Y/N) came out of the bedroom with her clutch in one hand and heels in the other, a dressed up Loki couldn’t help but arise from his seat on the sofa. The last time he had seen her dressed up for him was probably seven to eight months ago. Although she looked beautiful in his eyes everyday, there always used to be this gloom that kept holding her glow back.
Once his astonished lips found their composure back, he cleared his throat and offered his hand to hold the clutch while she wore the heels.
“I was-” Loki reconsidered his words. “You look ravishing!”
A faint blush surfaced on her cheeks at the compliment which was both unexpected and unfamiliar these days.
There was, however, something about his eyes and about the way that his lips remained slightly parted that told her that he wasn’t done letting his thoughts out. Caught in the dilemma of whether to poke his silence or whether to extend concern, she decided to act on her instincts.
“Something bothering you?” She asked gingerly.
Slightly startled, Loki opened and closed his mouth rather comically before finally speaking but not without hesitancy lacing every word.
“You-you look gorgeous. But…I…”
The wait was killing her. Several undesirable thoughts breached her worried mind. When she could no longer take the burden, she interrupted his thoughts.
“You may say it, Loki…whatever it is… It’s okay if you have to cancel tonight’s plan-”
“What? No!” Loki exclaimed, afraid that the only chance of making things right again might be lost because of his musings.
“All I wanted to say,” he clarified, “is that you-you need not wear…my-these…colours. I mean, it looks better on you than on me but…you should not do anything…that you…do not want..to.”
Loki’s voice began losing its confidence and strength the more his sentence tiptoed towards its end.
There was a time when she used to buy almost every piece of clothing in a particular shade of green. “Loki green” she used to call it. Call it obsession or love, her passion grew to such an extent that Loki had once jested that he would have to file a complaint for copyright violations and that he would have to get himself a new colour.
But things had changed eventually. So, when he saw her wearing a dress that was dipped in his colours, he was, needless to say, thrilled. But the sad part was that he couldn’t be convinced that she would actually wear it because she wanted to and not in an empty attempt to impress him.
When she realised where he was going, she was quick to add a funny remark, or so she had thought.
“Oh! I’m not doing anything to please you, God of Mischief, if that’s what you’re thinking.”
“Oh!” Loki seemed to be hit by the words. “I see. I get it. I was just…”
Observing how his head hung low, she quickly re-ran her words in her head. It was only then she realised that they were probably more snarky than she had intended them to be.
“Loki, I…I did not mean to…did not mean it that way.” She tried her best to clarify but every word seemed to trip over the other. “What I wanted to say was that…I really wanted to wear this colour. Your colour. And it’s not out of some…obligation…or-or need to impress you that I have chosen this. I swear, Loki. Please don’t get me wrong!”
The weight lifted off his chest. But the incident left them both wary of what to speak, or how to speak. It reminded them once more of the raging river of misunderstandings flowing between them.
The ride was a quiet one. And so were the first few moments at the restaurant.
When inquired about the order to be placed, Loki insisted that his wife choose the menu for the evening. He wanted to give her the freedom of choice, he wanted to make it about her.
But amidst their exchange, she somehow got the impression that he wasn’t enthusiastic about their date, that he simply wanted to pass every decision-making onto her and just get over with the night.
—
Not many months ago…
It was the weekend, and (Y/N) found herself busy typing away on her laptop, just like most other weekends.
Loki had just returned from an afternoon walk by the beach. Humming on his own and half-hidden by the door of the refrigerator, he was busy looking at his options for a liquid refreshment. Finally finding one that seemed fit to satiate his taste buds, he came to stand beside (Y/N), idly gazing at her laptop screen.
“You should have come with me. The sunset was amazing!” He smiled while kissing the crown of her head with a feathery touch.
“I wish I could but,” she continued without lifting her eyes from the screen, “I have work to do.”
“I know,” Loki sighed, “Some other time, then.”
With a smile, he turned to leave when her comment made him halt his steps.
“There’s never another time for me,” she whispered to herself but hoped that Loki would hear it clearly enough.
“What?”
“What? Nothing. I was mumbling nonsense to myself. As usual,” she shrugged nonchalantly but her sarcastic smile and her eyes did not attempt to mask the lie.
“Why would there not be another time for you?” He took a step towards her.
“So, you heard it. Why ask me then?” She carried on jabbing at the keypad but wasn’t sure if her notes made any sense anymore.
“I heard it, yes. I just was not sure if I had heard you correctly. Why would you say that there would not be another time for you?”
With an exasperated sigh, she slammed down the lid of her laptop. “Loki, when has there been time for me lately? I mean, you have been busy. I have been busy, too. But…somehow you always find time for yourself and never for me!”
“Well,” Loki replied with a slight irritation, “I did ask you to come with me today. But you said that you have work to do.”
“Right. I have work to do. But why can’t you have time for me when I’m free? Why not offer a walk at night?”
“That is because you say that you are exhausted after a long day! Every. Single. Day!!” It was becoming more and more difficult for Loki to control his frustration which was quickly morphing into anger. “(Y/N), what is the matter with you?”
“I don’t know,” she threw her hands in the air. “Maybe I have become boring to you! You tell me.”
“What? Bor-” Wiping his face with both his hands, Loki inhaled deeply before slowing letting the air out. “I do not know where this is coming from but if you would like to go for a walk or simply go out tonight, I would be more than willing to accompany you.”
“Hah!” Her sharp laugh mocked him. “See, now that I told you, you are ‘willing’ to accompany me. Why, do you not ‘want’ to take me out?”
“(Y/N), (Y/N), (Y/N)!!!” His control finally gave in to a shout. “Why do you speak this way? At the very least, tell me why you are angry! Tell me what I can do. Please! Let us go out tonight, talk about this, and solve everything. Tell me where you would like to go.”
“Seriously, Loki! Can you not ever, for once, stop dumping all questions on me, and do something for me, from your heart? Or do you not want to do anything at all?”
“Norns!!” Loki’s shout this time shook her a little but her ego was too thick to let any vulnerability slip past it.
“Do not shout at me, Loki! You never spend time with me nowadays! You never think about how I am anymore. And this is not just about today. It’s the same story everyday!”
“I try! Heavens know that I try. But-”
“But what?”
There were so many things that Loki wanted to say. But his anger and her obstinacy were too high at the moment to allow anyone to think sensibly.
“I do not wish to speak on this matter anymore now. Let us talk once you feel better.”
With these words, he opened the front door, stepped out determinedly, and slammed the door behind him.
“Feel better? Do you think I’m sick? I’m mentally unstable? Or what? Run away because that’s exactly what you do all the time!”
She stood there screaming her accusations to an empty house and sobbing into her palms.
—
Present day…
“Are you sure that I should place the order?” She managed to afford an almost real smile. “I’m not very good at making these choices, you know that.”
“Come on, now. You are not at all bad at this. On the contrary, I believe you are excellent! Could you please place the order while I visit the washroom?”
He gently pushed the chair and left her with a myriad of heavy questions floating in her head.
…
At some point of time, in the middle of the night, her sleep faded away. Whether it was a dream or some discomfort, she did not realise at first, but soon discovered that it was the heat. She tried to pull the covers down but something was blocking it.
Loki’s arm was gently, but heavily draped around her waist. A small smile tugged at her lips at the sight. It was something that she hadn’t witnessed in months! The weight of his arms made her feel secure. His tender grip around her reminded her of a safe haven.
Sighing deeply, she slowly turned so as not to awaken him. In the dim light of the sleeping city outside, she observed his peaceful face. He looked so different in his sleep! There was a serenity to his features that seemed to wash away all negativity from the mind and from the air! It reminded her of all those moments when she had fallen, again and again, in love with him. And something warm fluttered deep within her heart.
Planting a soft kiss near his jawline, she gently placed her hand on the side of his neck. And drifted off into sleep again with the feeling of Loki’s pleasant coolness seeping into her.
…
It had been three days since their date. The days that passed in between witnessed loving smiles being sent across rooms, and even heard some small laughs echoing between the walls. The house seemed more illuminated by the sun rays streaming in through the curtains.
And yet, it wasn’t bright enough. And yet, the light seemed to be filtering through a large cloud looming over the house.
Encouraged by the recent success of their date night, Loki decided to take a bolder step.
He strode into the kitchen, where she had just started the arrangements for dinner.
“(Y/N)?”
“Hmm?” Her eyes and hands were busy with the food to be prepared.
“I was thinking…well…you love the mountains, do you not?”
She laughed softly, “Of course, I do. Why?”
“We could go on a vacation. What do you say?”
The melody of the words made her leave everything and turn her full attention towards him, “I…It’s…That would be wonderful!!”
“We have been stuck here for a rather long time now. I was thinking of a long vacation, away from all the mess of life. We will see places, relax, drink wine and enjoy the beauty of life!”
Laughing merrily at his words, she shook her head, “Dramatic as always! Yes, I ‘d love that!”
“Let’s do it right away! Next week, shall we?”
Her face fell at the words. “Uh…well…”
“I am thinking of a trip to New Asgard to begin with. I’m sure Thor would be ecstatic to see you again!...”
Loki was so enthusiastic in planning their vacation that he failed to notice the frown on her face - one that was growing heavier with each passing second.
“... We haven’t visited them in a long while. Seems like a century! Ha! And to think I have already seen thousands of years!!” He pondered, lost in his own world.
“I’m sorry, can we postpone the dates?” She interrupted hesitantly.
“Postpone? Darling, what are you saying? It will be excellent! Trust me! And then we shall go to the mountains!”
“I have this work thing. There’s this project that needs me. And I must get it completed by the end of this month. So-”
“Come on, (Y/N)! We shall go to the sea if you want! Anything that you desire!”
“But this is important!”
“What is important right now is you taking a break! We need to take a break.” Loki’s voice softened. “You have been working day and night, and look at what has become of you. You look so tired all the time.”
“This is about my career, Loki,” she continued on a confident but gentle note. “This project is important because it will give me - give us the opportunity to live a better life. I’m doing it for us.”
“We already have a good life,” he tucked a stray strand of hair behind her ear, “but we need better…I do not know how to put it. (Y/N), this can be our chance to make our marriage better. I’m ready to give everything into it.”
“So am I. But…can we just postpone it…maybe a month later?”
Realising that he was going nowhere with it, Loki took a deep breath and nodded. “Fine. If that’s what you want.”
“Loki! Please! I… It’s just that-”
“It is fine, (Y/N). You do not owe me an explanation.”
“No, please listen to me. It’s not that I do not want to go with you. Heaven knows I do. Although I’m sure that we’ll end up quarrelling anywhere we go,” she chuckled. “But-”
“That is alright,” he cut her off with a tight-lipped smile. “You may do as you please. I understand that your job is important. I-I certainly do.”
“Loki, please don’t make it sound like that!”
“Like what?” His voice wasn’t loud but his furrowed brows and the suddenness of his words made it obvious that he had snapped. And it startled her.
“Like…like…”
“Like what, (Y/N)? Like I am forcing you to sacrifice your career for me? Just like I have, apparently, made you sacrifice your life, your happiness for me?”
“I never said anything like that!” She pleaded.
Her feet started towards him but stopped midway.
“Yes, you did not say that. My apologies. Not now, not today. But you did, did you not? Many times! In some way or the other you always keep reminding me how unhappy you are! Of how I robbed you of a life that could have been a grand one! A happy one.”
“Loki. Please. Stop.” Gone was her pleading voice. The pain cruelly dug up all the anger that had been buried somewhere deep inside.
But Loki was far from stopping. The dam had broken and all the pent up emotions - those that he never knew were lurking inside him, waiting to be released - had taken over his senses.
“Loki,” she called him once again, the hint of a warning lingering just below the surface.
“The truth is that you never truly loved me. You simply claim to love me - a fake, hollow, brittle claim.”
“Do not accuse me of that!” She finally snapped.
“Why not? It is the truth, is it not? Had you loved me, you would have understood, at least appreciated how hard I try to make you happy! To give you the life you have always wanted.”
“Have I not loved you? Have I not understood or appreciated you, Loki? I have tried to make our lives better, too. But you do not seem to notice that. Because no matter what happens, you are too occupied with your narcissistic self!”
“So this is it, then?” Loki spat out a cold laugh. “I am narcissistic. I believe you never got to see past my mistakes, ha. Did you? You see me as a self-absorbed being, capable of nothing but rot and decay? Unable to love anyone else other than myself?”
“I never said that, Loki! You’re manipulating my words again!”
“Oh! You think I am a child who does not understand the foulness lying beneath your lines?”
“Yes you are!! And you may take that shitty mind of yours and…and just...go away! Go somewhere where you’d be happy!” Tears were swelling past her eyes. “Somewhere away from the source of all your sorrow. Somewhere away from me!”
“Oh! Now you kick me out of our house? Wow! Marvellous, (Y/N)! Marvellous!”
“I don’t want any more of this!” She wanted to turn away, run into her room and shut herself from the world until the storm calmed down.
But something stopped her. Her eyes went wide at the sight.
“It has always been about you,” Loki continued, “about your work, your problems, your priorities. And I am the last on your list of priorities! You never have time for us. And then you blame it all on me! You are the one responsible for our fallout!!”
A faint glow had started taking shape around Loki’s fingertips.
“Loki!” It began as a frightened whisper.
“You torment me every moment of my existence. You speak as if you mean nothing to me, when the truth is that I mean nothing to you! You look down upon me as if I am the worst creature in this entire universe, the most selfish-.”
“Loki-”
“-being. I will not have-”
“Loki!!”
“What??”
“Your hands!”
Loki’s eyes went wide, and for a brief moment, his heart was strangled with fear. Regaining control over himself, panting, he looked up to see a terrified (Y/N) staring at him.
“I’m so sorry, (Y/N). I did not mean to…I did not even realise-”
“This is not the first time, Loki.”
“I know. I… Please, (Y/N), forgive me. It will not happen again. I promise!”
All strength had left her. “Do you see what we do to each other? What we bring out in each other? Is this right?”
The fear of losing control, of losing everything he held dear had quickly put out the anger boiling inside, and replaced it with a crushing sorrow.
“It is not. But we will change it…Can we change it? Or is it-”
“Too late?... I fear so.”
Thoroughly exhausted, Loki leaned on the nearest wall for support.
“This is not what I wanted,” he let out a defeated sigh.
“I know… And I’m sorry for it. You could have had everything you ever wanted. A god! And you chose me. And,” she huffed, “this is what you get. Wasted years of your life!”
“I did not want this for us,” he corrected her. “That is what I meant.”
“I...I’m just…not the right person for you.”
“Why do you always twist my words?”
“Because your actions speak otherwise! And I don’t even have to twist your words, they are…they are…”
“They are what?” Although Loki tried to keep his voice steady, his eyes were far from hiding the anger and frustration that had started simmering again.
“They are simply fake. Hollow.”
It physically hurt him to drag this conversation further. He knew where it was going and where it would end. It always left them both emotionally bruised. And yet like every other time, he hoped that it would end in something else, something good. He hoped that, at least for once, it would end in them hugging tightly and apologising for all the hurt they had been unintentionally exchanging.
“(Y/N),” it was a little above a whisper. It was a prayer. It was a hope.
“It hurts, Loki,” a broken whisper escaped her, in response to Loki’s plea. A tear ran down her cheek as she spoke. “It hurts like hell…every time we quarrel. Every time we are mean to each other.”
“I know!” He took a few hopeful steps towards her. “It hurts me, too. I-I just cannot-”
“Let us stop!”
“I want us to stop.”
“I don’t want to…I…but, Loki, we have to!”
“Let us-”
“Let’s end this. Us. In fact-in fact, there is no longer ‘us’, Loki. It’s been long dead. So, let us just stop pretending that we have something. It’s no use dragging this, living every day dreading a-a fight or cruel words or…I don’t know…I’m just afraid to do anything or to say anything.”
The ground seemed to fade away from beneath Loki’s feet. This was nothing close to what he was thinking, what he was hoping for. His knees felt like they would give away under the weight of a seemingly dead but heavy heart.
As his mind frantically searched for something to say, he looked again and again at her face - that sweet, exhausted, weeping face - that had grown on him like a habit, that had been his anchor on this alien planet. He constantly kept hoping that she would change her words. To all the gods before him, to the Norns, he kept praying that he had mistaken her words for something else.
But his prayers seemed to evaporate somewhere in the suffocating air of their shared house.
“Tell me you do not mean that,” Loki pleaded with her. “Please tell me that it was only a-a momentary remark that you made. A passing comment. Please!”
“I love you, Loki…but I cannot live with you. Not anymore,” she announced with an excruciating lump in her throat. “I’m sorry.”
Her whisper was far more cruel than the sharpest dagger. Dazed, Loki watched her retract into their room and softly shut the door. He could hear her sobs but the confidence and the strength to hold her, to console her had left him. With unsure steps, he made his way to the sofa, and dropped himself into it.
—
A nightmare woke her up. The entirety of the short period of her sleep was filled with nightmares. Painful moments of her fights with Loki, fears of him leaving her, of finding someone else while she watched - all the things that she found unbearable tainted her dreamscape.
As if they were the only windows to escape the tortures conjured by her subconscious mind, her eyes opened and brought her back to a gentler reality. But it took her only a few seconds to remember the incidents of the previous night and to realise that even the real world wasn’t very assuring.
The morning light stung her swollen eyes. In a futile attempt to clear her vision, she rubbed them, and squinted at her phone to check the time. It was past 7 AM. Loki was usually up around this time unless he had to stay up till late.
A sudden emptiness filled her heart, as if it had been hollowed from within. The urge to see Loki, the need to have him in her presence started overwhelming her. And although her body seemed to be void of any strength to leave the bed, she reluctantly pushed herself off it and shuffled towards the door. It was not just her body that was hesitant; her mind was, too, given that she was the one who had declared that they shouldn’t be together anymore, given that she had hurt Loki enough to make him turn his back towards her, given that they did not make any sense together anymore. But despite everything, her heart screamed for him, which did not seem to make any sense to her either.
Timidly, she reached the door of the study, which had lately been Loki’s escapade from the harsh reality of their once beautiful marriage. It was open. The silence told her that Loki was probably still asleep on the dark green chaise lounge - one of the few pieces of their home that they both still agreed on. Tugged by both reluctance and the sobbing desire to see him at least once, just to make sure that he was alright, she stood beside the door for a while, until at last, she decided to take a step forward and peek inside.
It was empty.
Surprised, she wondered where he could have been. Maybe the guest room? But that was unlikely of him. Chewing on her bottom lip, she made her way to the said room.
It was unoccupied as well. The bed had no trace of anybody touching it in a while.
Maybe he was in the bathroom. As she strained her ears for any sign of activity, realisation dawned upon her that the house had been absolutely silent except for the sounds of her movements.
“I love you, Loki…but I cannot live with you.”
Panic started piercing its claws into her as scenes from her recent nightmares floated into her mind - broken pieces of her subconscious mind where she watched Loki leaving her for good, where she found herself crying to sickness all alone in that godforsaken house.
With tears blurring her vision, she almost ran from one corner of the house to another with the hopes of finding him or at least finding something - anything - that told her that he would return, that he had probably gone out to get some fresh air or to attend to some urgent matter. But she found nothing.
Desperately, she called his number only to hear the faint ringtone of his phone floating down the corridor. Following the sound, she reached the study, where his phone lay amidst a pile of books. She searched the table frantically for a letter or a note that at least explained the reason for his absence.
Nothing.
And that was exactly what she felt on every square inch of her body as she slumped on the floor. Nothing. A strange numbness overtook her as she realised that the previous night had indeed been too much to tolerate, that they had probably, finally, crossed that line of no return, that her words were probably too harsh for him to bear.
“You torment me every moment of my existence.”
This was soon followed by anger, for she was still there in the house, still ready to be there with him despite all the disagreements and fights and the unhappiness that lingered. But he had left. And left without a word.
Tears flooded her eyes and onto the floor as she howled in pain - a pain so deep and impossible that it felt like her heart would carve itself out of her chest. She didn’t know where to find him. He was a sorcerer. He could be anywhere. He could be in New Asgard in the comforting company of his brother or just sitting on a deserted shore of the ocean in some lonely corner of the planet.
“Tell me you do not mean that.”
Before her miserable senses would persuade her to do something that she might regret, she decided to act rationally and wait for a while. Maybe he was out for a walk. A walk always calmed him down. Or maybe he was indeed sitting by the ocean and will be back home once he realises that she needed him. Maybe he went to the Avenger Compound, which would be unlikely but she was ready to accept any story, any consolation, as long as it gave her hopes of his return.
An hour passed by. The lonely walls of the house witnessed her pacing from one corner to the other or fiddling nervously with her fingers or with the armrests of the chair she sat on.
By the time it was almost nine, she had lost all abilities and patience to endure. She had to do something, she decided.
Not knowing where to begin, she thought of giving Thor a call. As she staggered on her feet, trying to get to her room and to her phone, she heard the unmistakable click of the front door’s lock. Although frozen for a second, she managed to rush out - out of the room, out of her misery - and to the front door.
There he was, her Loki, in his joggers and sweatshirt, carrying a couple of bags in hand. It was probably, she felt, the most relieving, the most beautiful and the most hopeful sight that she had ever seen in her life!
“Where were you?” She managed to choke out.
Loki, who was rendered both speechless and immobile by (Y/N)’s miserable state, almost did not hear her. He had expected her to be sad, to skip breakfast, he had half-expected her eyes to be swollen but to find her in a state that screamed grief was something that he had never imagined.
“Where were you?” She repeated, louder and more desperate this time.
“I-I was…(Y/N)!! What has happened to you?” Placing the bags beside the door, he quickly came to hold her.
Forgotten were the fights of the previous night, forgotten were the cruel words that were exchanged. All that mattered now was her. Only her.
As his arms cocooned her, the last of her strength crumbled. It was Loki’s arms that were keeping her from falling to the ground again.
“I thought you had left me,” she wept into his chest.
“What??” It came out as a soft breath. “How…how could you ever think so? I would never do that to you! Never!!”
“I’m sorry, Loki! I’m so sorry! I shouldn’t have said what I said last night. I didn’t mean any of them. I swear, I didn’t!”
“Shh...I know, my love. And I’m sorry just as much! I have hurt you, too. I know. But know that I can never think about leaving you. Because that will cause me far more pain than anything else I can imagine.”
He slowly untangled himself from her, only to wipe the tears off her cheek and card his slender fingers through her dishevelled hair. Holding her tight, he walked her to the sofa, and carefully made her sit on it while he kneeled before her.
“Now tell me, darling,” he kissed her hands and engulfed them in his own large ones, ”are you feeling alright?”
Unable to trust her voice, she simply nodded.
“I’ll run you a bath, and you will wash away all tears and tiredness as well as all hurtful thoughts. Okay? I’m never leaving you. And as comforting as it may sound now, you may have to keep tolerating me all your life, for I can’t live a single day of my life without you…no matter how much we quarrel, how much we shout at each other. Alright?”
He did it. After months of hurting, Loki finally managed to say the words. And also managed to make a small smile crack its way on her face.
Kissing her knuckles once again, he got up to prepare the bath that he had promised her. But she was quicker; silently, she held his wrist, forbidding him from leaving her even temporarily.
“Where did you go so early in the morning?”
“I went to get groceries,” he replied calmly, as if his absence was nothing unnatural.
“At seven in the morning??”
“Six, actually.” Loki sighed. I wasn’t able to sleep all night. So…I went for a walk and…went to the beach. It was peaceful, with no one there. It gave me the perfect environment to think, to realise that…regardless of where we end up, my path will always be entwined with yours. I do not want a path that does not lead to you, that does not go along with yours. I-”
“You didn’t even think of informing me? Didn’t think that I might panic?” Her voice was rising with every line. “That I might worry for you? Don’t you realise that despite everything, I love you? That I can’t afford to lose you? Yes, I might have said some nasty things yesterday. Maybe I had said something like I can’t be with you anymore or…I don’t know! But I still love you! Nothing changes that. I still worry about you. You are still my husband. And I won’t accept anything any other way!”
“Sweet,” he knelt before her again, “you can scold me as much as you want. I’m sorry. You were sleeping, and I knew that you were up all night. So, I did not want to disturb you. I thought I would return before you woke up. Guess I did not realise how time passed… But, right now, you need some food and rest. You will take a bath, then we will eat, and then we will have the entire day to fight again. Is that a deal?”
Her quivering lips did not have the confidence of giving an answer, so she simply chose to nod.
With a soft kiss to the back of her hand, he stood up.
“Loki?” She was just able to grab the tips of his fingers to stop him from leaving.
He knelt down on a knee. “Yes, love?”
“What do we do about us? We can’t just keep fighting everyday…We are bound to drift away again. Someday. I want that peace back. I want that happiness back, Loki.”
“Well, I do not remember a day when you did not bicker with me,” he gave her a teasing smile, and watched with joy as a smile surfaced on her sad face. Cupping her cheek, he continued, “I had been thinking…this morning…about us. About why we continue to vex each other when we are so much in love with each other. I think, and I’m not sure, but…I think we worry too much about what might annoy the other. And the worst part is, we do not even voice these worries! (Y/N), we must speak our hearts out. We-”
“Now that makes more sense,” she sniffed.
“It does, does it not?” A small laugh of relief escaped him. And her nod further encouraged him to bring his signature smirk back. “But I do not guarantee that I shall stop bickering with you.”
“Guess we can’t stop fighting?” She chuckled, and the voice tingled in Loki’s ears like the most melodious sound he had ever heard.
“Every couple has their own way of showing love, I assume,” he smiled. “Ours is…”
“Messed up,” she completed the line for him.
“Just like us,” he added with a soft kiss on her forehead.
Once he was done preparing the bath for her, he started towards the kitchen to prepare breakfast. He was going to make the entire day about her, he had decided. But just as he was about to leave the bathroom, she called him.
“Would you…I mean,” her tongue darted between her dried lips, “would you like to join…me?”
He stared at her disbelievingly. It had been months since they had been intimate. He wondered if it was just a momentary demand created by her recent sorrows. Maybe she would come to her senses and would regret being so close to him.
Seeing him hesitate, she almost believed that she had made a mistake, and her heart plummeted several hundred feet below the floor.
“It-It’s alright,” she stammered, “I…I don’t know what I was thinking. I’m sorry. My brain isn’t working properly. I-I don’t want to… I mean…I’ll just…” She pointed towards the warm water and bath salts waiting for her.
“Are you sure?” He finally spoke.
This made her stare at him with hope.
“Are you sure you want me to…” he gestured towards the bath with his eyes and gulped.
“Yes. Yes, I mean…only if you want to. I don’t want to make you uncomfortable. I know we haven’t been-”
“I would love to!” He interrupted her with a warm smile.
“Really?” Her hopeful face was what gave Loki further confidence. “Are you sure?”
“Of course, I am,” he stepped towards her. “May I?”
A small, confident nod was all Loki needed to help her undress. As her clothes dropped on the floor, she helped him with the same. On any other day, she would have been paranoid about leaving the clothes on the floor and not in the wash. But today nothing bothered her. All she wanted to feel was Loki and his love - a love that she once thought was lost but had discovered again only a few minutes ago, and after an agony that she did not want to experience ever again.
Loki never forgot how perfect she was in his eyes, but seeing her after such a long time made the breath in his throat hitch. A blush crept up his cheeks as his eyes rediscovered her. And he noticed a similar crimson painting her cheeks and ears as her eyes darted across his form before fixating on the floor.
Loki helped her into the bath and settled behind her. Slowly, he pulled her towards him until her back was resting upon his chest. The warmth of the water, of their bodies seemed to drain away every tension, every pain, every negativity that they had been feeling lately.
This closeness was perhaps the element that was missing between them, they realised. Too engrossed in their individual lives, they blamed the exhaustion, the busy schedules and each other for the growing distance between them, when all they needed, perhaps, was a hug, an assuring hold of the hands or a chaste, warm kiss.
Loki took her left hand and brought it to his lips while his other hand settled on her neck, slowly making its way down her shoulder, massaging along the way.
“How long has it been,” he asked, “since you took care of the pain in your shoulders?”
She gave a soft laugh. “I don’t even remember. It has become a part of me now.”
“Not anymore.”
With expert hands, he released every knot on her shoulder and on her back until she was sighing in relief.
“What about you?” She turned halfway towards him.
“Later. And I’m a God anyway. My tolerance level is quite high,” he jested.
“Do Gods not get stiff muscles?”
“Well…they do…but not as much as you mortals.”
His cheeky grin felt like sunshine in the room.
“Us mortals, huh?” She laughed.
“Mm-hmm.”
She brought his arms around her, engulfing herself in his warmth, feeling safe from the world, from her own demons.
“(Y/N)?” Loki called softly after a long moment of silence. He had rested his cheek on the crown on her head, and his deep voice seemed to send tiny vibrations through her veins.
“Hmm?” Her response was dreamy; she had already started drowsing off in the safety of his embrace.
“Can we begin anew? What if we go away somewhere, for a few days? Away from the noise and hustle of this city? Somewhere quiet. Only the two of us? No fancy vacation, no itinerary. Only us. And whatever we wish to do.”
The water splashed softly as she turned sideways to face him.
“Please! I’d love that!”
And with that plea on her lips and moisture in her eyes, she put her hand behind his neck and pulled him for a warm kiss. Something, which they both realised, they should have done a long time ago. It wasn’t rushed. It wasn’t greedy. It was a slow unfolding of all the emotions that they had buried inside them. It was the resurfacing of the unconditional love that they felt for each other.
“I love you, (Y/N),” he murmured on her lips.
“And I you, Loki. But I don’t think there’s ever going to be a day when you do not piss me off,” she confessed with the hint of a smile toying on the corners of mouth.
“Hmm…I do not mind as long as the fight is compensated in this manner,” he unleashed his famous smirk.
Laughter spilled from her lips as she slotted them once more against his eager ones.
***
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Eff Being Friends
Steve Rogers x POC!Goddess!Avenger!Reader “Ci”
? x POC!Goddess!Avenger!Reader “Ci”
Ex!Thor x POC!Goddess!Avenger!Reader "Ci”
Ex!Loki x POC!Goddess!Avenger!Reader "Ci”
Wordcount: 4191
Summary:
To say the relationship between Steve and I was complicated would be an understatement. But I’m not the one to blame. That honor goes to Captain Indecision, himself. So why would he ever think I would make things easy for him?
Warnings:
18+ Only MDNI, Angsty with some mild smut and surprise feels.
Notes:
Heavily inspired by “Fuck Being Friends” by Jessie Reyes. I have this need to fuck with Steve. Also there be a twist abound. Who could the mystery person be?
Banner by @cafekitsune Divider by @firefly-graphics
Your off and on relationship with one Steven Grant Rogers, is once again off. This hot and cold shit is for the birds. If it weren’t for his dick game being almost magical you would have written him off a long time ago. Well that and you might possibly be in love with the fucker too.
When he’s not self-conscious and feeding into his own paranoia, things are great. It’s when he lets his intrusive thoughts and the opinions of others guide him that things take a turn.
Like when he starts acting a fool now that Thor is on the compound for a visit with Loki. Both of whom are technically your exes but as you’re gods you don’t hold the same morality standards when it comes to multiple partners. You were actively hooking up with both of them at the same time, ages ago.
It may have even become a bit of a competition between the brothers at one point.
So why should you shy away from all the wonderful flirty banter and not so innocent exchanges being thrown your way. Steve needs a reminder that you’re not from this realm and he can’t toy with you as such. Just because you’ve put up with his bullshit thus far, does not mean you will continue too.
Being green with envy serves him right.
Tony has gotten into the habit of throwing a game night once a month for ‘morale’ or whatever. Honestly, you think it’s just an excuse to get everyone shit faced enough to reveal or do embarrassing things so that Jarvis can hoard it all to be used later. Whatever the reason, you are more than excited this months is happening while the Asgardians are here.
You’ve been having the best week with them. Reminiscing the good ol days and creating some hot and heavy new memories to add to the list.
“Watching you surrender to my magic. Wrapped tight in my shadows. Is a sight that will never cease to amaze me. Offering up your body, the perfect altar, for me to worship. To show my own devotion through your surrender. A gift I have never taken for granted my dear. Steven really is quite the fool.” Loki professed before rendering you brainless and cock drunk for hours.
Steve’s eyes have been attached to your frame all night. Begging for you to give him some attention. But you pay him no mind. You’re preoccupied being very flirty and touchy feely with everyone.
Tony has decided that tonight’s game is Truth or Dare. It seems the man of iron is also enjoying watching the gods get under Steve’s skin.
You take every dare, and they get raunchier by the ask. You give Nat, who is sat next to Captain Cranky, a sultry little lap dance that ends in a heated kiss. Only to be broken up by Steve’s quiet growl.
On your next turn your dared to make Thor get a boner without touching him. You saunter behind the loveseat he is perched on. Leaning in so that you can whisper in his ear. You regale him with all the dirty things you love that he does to you. The way his lightning makes you sing like no other. All stated low enough for only the gods and the super soldiers to hear. Your mission is a success of course. Thor’s unable to hide the ‘hammer’ tenting his slacks as he pulls you over the back of couch onto his lap and bites down on your throat making you giggle.
The game continues with Clint having to admit that he most certainly has seen his teammates getting it on when he has been up in the vents. “Some things you can’t unsee unfortunately.” He shivers.
Sam, having confessed who he thinks has the best ass, turns to you. “Truth or Dare Ci?”
“Dare of course. Why change it up now.”
“I dare you to get Loki to genuinely smile.”
You look at him quizzically. “You think you’re so smart. Prepare to be knocked down a peg or three bird boy.”
Standing you walk over to Loki, who has been leaning against the wall, observing all night. With a cheeky smile you wave your fingers and cloak yourselves in darkness that's not only soundproof but is also time spelled as well.
You lower to your knees and snap Loki’s pants out of existence. The visual of you before him is enough to turn his cock hard as steel in front of your very eyes. You waste no time attaching your lips to the foreskin covered tip. Teasing the sensitive flesh with your tongue before sinking down to the hilt. You pull out all the stops. Sucking his cock until he comes down your throat with a roar. Savoring every drop as he fills your belly.
Removing the spell, it seems to the room as if only 1 minute has passed. It does not go unnoticed that Loki is relaxed while he continues to lean against the wall. Grinning like a loon.
This is when Steve notices your slightly swollen lips and quiet panting. Having been on the receiving end of that look many a time, he seethes. Cracking the glass of whiskey in his hand.
You give your turn to Loki so that you may catch your breath. It’s no surprise to anyone that he chooses Steve. “Truth or Dare Captain?”
“Truth. I have nothing to hide.” He challenges the God of Mischief.
“Alright.” He glances at you quickly. Catching you subtly lick your lips, most likely still tasting of him, grinning to yourself. “When was the last time you got your cock properly serviced and with who?”
Everyone assumes the answer will be you when you were still together a couple weeks ago.
With a cocky grin and sip of his drink he answers as he stares you down. “Yesterday after training with Sharon. She caught me on my way to change in my room and said I looked tense and needed a release. I took her up on her offer. Plus she gives decent head.”
He must have thought that you were going to be upset that he let poor lovesick Sharon suck his dick instead of getting the best head of his life from you. You couldn’t care less actually.
Not when you were getting dicked down in your own post training bath with Thor. It really is a great way to help stretch out and relax your muscles.
“Good for you Steven. You always are so tense after a rough training session. I know I was. Thor helped sort me out though.” You sweetly state.
“Are you serious right now? You two were practically on the verge of killing each other in the training room.”
“Great foreplay. Don’t tell me you never partook in post battle coitus with her. She is ravenous after any kind of rough play.” Thor, the sweet himbo that he is, adds in.
“Fuck this. I’m going to bed.”
“Should I call Sharon to come lick your wounds?”
“Fuck you Ci”
“Sorry not tonight, Cap.”
In the state-of-the-art training room only Stark money could provide. Left to your own devices. You and Bucky are engaged in an intense sparring session.
Each move is calculated, precise, and born from years of relentless training. Bucky, a seasoned veteran, exudes an aura of quiet confidence and strength. While you, a woman of equal skill and determination, possess an uncanny ability to anticipate his every move.
As you grappled along the training matts, your bodies intertwined in a dance of submission and evasion. Knives glinted in the dim light, their edges a constant threat that kept you both on high alert.
On an instinct, you feigned a strike. Your body language, a masterpiece of your deception. In that split second, you seized the opportunity to swiftly maneuver behind the super soldier and lock him in a chokehold.
Triumph flashed in your eyes as you tightened your grip around his throat. Victory soon at hand.
But Bucky was not a man to be outdone. With a lightning-fast reversal, he spun on his heel, catching you off guard. His powerful muscles and Vibranium arm strained as he flipped you over, pinning you to the ground. A wry smile played on his lips as he secured his victory.
Though the training session had ended, the unspoken tension between the two of you lingered in the air.
“Still too cocky for your own good, Doll.”
“Are you ever going to get tired of saying that?”
“You ever gonna stop letting me best you?”
“And miss gazing into those icy blues of yours. I don’t think so. I’ve been a goner for them since the first time you laid eyes on me.”
The first time you met James Barnes was not in Germany like every likes to think. In fact, you had a prior and very intimate relationship with the Winter Soldier. You nursed him back to health long ago when he was still under Hydras thumb. He had wound up collapsed at your doorstep in the middle of nowhere when a mission went wrong and his handler died.
That was the first time he was able to begin remembering. You spent countless nights in front of the fire. Keeping each other warm as you explored these new feelings together. Keeping your skills sharp by engaging in sparring sessions that always ended up pressed flesh to flesh and covered in sweat. Helping him hold on to whatever memories would pop up. It was both sweet and dangerous.
When Hydra tripped your alarms, he begged you to just let him be retrieved. He couldn’t bare knowing any harm came to you because of him. So you let him go with a sweet kiss. But not before placing mark on his ribs that only other gods and those spelled to do so can see.
“You never told him did you?” You inquire.
“Neither did you.”
“I did it for your protection. You were on the run and I didn’t want anything to happen to you. It’s not my fault he went on the run for you. Who do you think helped him break everyone out and gave Shuri the extra juice to reverse those nasty words in your head.”
“I can’t keep watching him do this to you Ci. I’ve tried talking to him but he cant get it through his stubborn skull how good he has had it. I would give up my humanity to have you back again. I would never take you for granted. Hell, I’d happily let you keep him as a lover in our life if that’s what you so choose. I wouldn’t care who I had to share you with. Just as long as I had you.”
“James.” You whisper. “Take your shirt off.”
“What? Why?”
“Just do it please.”
As he does, the rest of the team file in along with Thor and Loki to run some training exercises of their own.
“Buck why do ya got your shirt off already pal?” Steve questions.
“I asked him to.” You deadpan.
“Why the hell would you do that for Ci? Don’t you have Thor and Loki to play with. Bucky is off limits.”
“I’m afraid that’s where you wrong Steven.”
Bucky looks at you with pleading eyes. Unfortunately you just don’t care to keep this secret anymore.
“James, lift your left arm and turn your side towards our team please.”
“Oh! Your finally going to do it. I was wondering how long, if ever, you were going to let them in on it.” Loki teases.
“On what?” Steve grits out.
“On this.” With a wave of your hand a symbol appears on Bucky's ribs. Glowing a soft golden light that matches your eyes. A chalice overflowing with wine.
“He already is mine. He has been for a quite some time. And will remain that way until he draws his last breath. Which wont be for a very long time as his soul is tied to mine.”
Bucky looks at you with confusion in his eyes. “You gave me your soul bond? Even though I was under Hydras control.”
“I did. It was what gave you the extra strength to endure and survive. I knew you would make it back to me one day. As an immortal I have all the time in the world to wait.”
“But you were with me when I brought him back here.” Steve blurts out.
“Well aren’t you the observant one Stevie. It changes nothing. If he had come to me that day and declared he wanted his place by side, he’d of had it in heartbeat. After a discussion between all of us of course. I’m not actually heartless. I just come off that way.”
“What the fuck Ci?! My best friend! You couldn’t tell me you had been with my best friend when he was brainwashed.”
“Watch your tongue, Rogers. You have no room to speak upon what I did or did not disclose to you. I wasn’t the one playing games with the others heart and emotions now was I.” You seethe.
“I asked her not to.” Bucky imparts. “I was free of Hydra, and we were rebuilding our friendship and I didn’t want to mess it up by intruding on what you had. I was just happy to be near her again and that she had someone I trusted by her side. But man was I wrong. What the hell happened to you Steve? Little Stevie from Brooklyn would have never treated a dame, let alone a goddess, the way you have Ci.”
“Don’t try and turn the blame on me Buck. You could have told me you’d been with her. We shared girls before back when I couldn’t get any on my own. What was so different with her?”
The team looks at each other after that comment with curious brows.
“Because she means more to me than just sex and that is what you would have reduced it to. I told myself, I would either get to have her fully, out in the open or not at all. Keeping my love tucked in the shadows.”
“So you’re the only one who can love her?” Steve shouts.
You clear my throat. “Ahem. You gave up that right when you kicked me to the curb yet again two weeks ago.”
“That doesn’t mean I don’t love you. I just get all lost in my head thinking about starting a family and how would that even be possible with a goddess if I couldn’t even get my dance with Peggy. Then I get angry and need space so I just end it so I can really think things through. I always come back though, Doll. Always.”
“Wooow.” Tony says with a clap. “Capsicle really stuck his foot in it this time.”
“So, your telling me, that instead of just having a conversation about what’s prattling around in that stubborn ass head of yours you thought it prudent to just break up with me then turn around and ask for me to take you back time and time again?” Your eyes alight with golden fire as your temperature raises.
“Avengers, I’d advise you to get behind me and Thor for your safety. I’ve only ever seen her this angry a handful of times and it usually does not end well.” Loki nonchalantly states.
“Yes. No. I-I don’t know. I was confused okay!” He shouts back. “Needed to work some shit out.”
“And that required you to be between Sharon's thighs and any attractive woman who gave you the time of day?”
“Well no, not exactly. That just helped me shut my brain off. But it never felt as good as being inside you.”
“Well, congrats to me for having such good pussy. Why is that though? Does my pussy beat better than my heart does? Boy, please, you aren’t blind. Your too smart for that lie.”
“I’m an idiot when it comes to women and love in general okay. Give me a fight and I know exactly what to do. But love? I’m clueless.”
“Don’t expect pity from me for you playing with my heart. I gave you more than enough room to grow and explore and figure things out as they came. It’s not my fault you chose to throw those things in my face. It is my fault for taking you back so many times though. Especially after Bucky arrived. But he wanted to stay loyal to you. His oldest pal. So I catered to his wishes. Even if it ended up to my detriment.”
“Seemed to be doing just fine to me while you were hooking up with Loki and Thor.”
“My Godly exes. Who I was in a relationship with a millennia ago in another realm. Men who I trust enough with my body to understand that carnal pleasure is all I am able to afford them at this time?”
“Makes no difference to me. Not when you were parading it around. I now can only imagine how it made Buck feel.”
“Didn’t bother me. I know all about how their relationships worked. Gods are different. She’s not in love with them like that. Not anymore at least. They were no threat to me. Plus I was still staying in the shadows.”
“Also.” Thor interrupts. “That lovely little soul bound symbol along Barnes’ ribs can only be seen by other Gods and anyone the bond holder deems fit to see it. So we already knew where at least half of her heart was held. Plus she is such a great lover. I never pass up the chance for such pleasure when I am afforded it.”
“Aye Aye” Loki agrees.
Steve throws his hands up and storms off. Most likely to go ruin a punching bag or five.
Bucky takes the opportunity to embrace you in front of everyone. At his acceptance of your claim, gold and black lines appear on your left shoulder. Matching the pattern of his Vibranium arm.
“Seems the bond has formerly been reciprocated. Welcome to Immortality White Wolf.”
“What are we going to do about Steve?”
“Let him go pout or fuck or whatever he needs to do. When he’s calmed down, we’ll have a conversation and figure out if he deserves a place by our side. You do have a very very long life ahead of you now.”
“Oh he has a looong way to go before I’m okay with letting him get close to you like that again. I think you gave him far too many chances.”
“I gave you a chance from the start didn’t I. Wasn’t planning to fall so quickly or for you to have such an impact on me but sometimes the fates like to play games.”
“Doesn’t help when you spell their lovers for making a pass at you.” Loki discloses.
“Excuse me, but I was spelled for my protection. If they had tried to keep their hands to themselves nothing would have happened to them.” You defend. “And If I remember correctly, you benefitted that night from the spell as well. Bedding down 3 fates at once is quite a feat. You’re welcome.”
Loki grins that devilish smile. “I’d be happy to show you my gratitude once more.”
After family dinner later that night…
“Are you serious Steve? You can’t possibly be serious right now. Who the fuck gave you the right to even speak with such vitriol on your tongue about him? He may care about maintaining his salvaged reputation but honey I am a whole mess of I don’t give a fuck. There is nothing you can do or say to me that I haven’t already done to myself. So come on. Try me. I love stupid games. I always come up with the best prizes.”
“Doll, you don’t need to do this. I’m okay. Steve's just hurting.”
“Like hell you are James. I know that look in your eyes and I’m not okay with it. Everything inside of me wants to make a scene right now. To bring America’s Golden Boy to his knees. But I know you don’t want that. So, this is the best solution.”
“Oh, wow. You need the goddess to fight your battles for you now Buck. Just look at you pussy whipped already. I must say I much preferred when I didn’t know you had had my woman before me.” The angry blonde spouts off.
That was it. That what the last nail in his soon to be coffin. Your shoulders relaxed, as a calmness took over. You turned to smile sweetly at the group of hero’s lounging around you in the common room. “If you’ll excuse me.”
You rise to your feet. Bucky reaches out with his metal arm, giving your hand a squeeze and looking into your almost vacant eyes. “Doll?”
You just squeeze his hand back before releasing it and starting to walk away. You could hear Steve’s teeth clenching as he bites down on his jaw. A quiet had settled within the room.
“Sure can dish it out. Too bad you can’t ta-“
That was all he was able to make out before your hand tightened around his windpipe. No one moved to help the hero.
“What was that? We’re you going to imply that I couldn’t take it. Tsk tsk tsk.” You make sure to dig your nails in, allowing little rivulets of crimson to take the course of gravity and stain is alabaster skin.
His eyes begin frantically searching the faces of his friends around him. Surely someone would come to his aid. He was the leader of the team wasn’t he.
“Oh, they won’t help you my dear. As you know I’m not exactly mortal. And therefore, even with all their nifty enhancements. They are no match for me. Expect Wanda. Although I really don’t want to know the truth to that. I very much like the Scarlet Witch.”
You allow him to take a quick breath and he squeaks out. “Thor. Loki.”
“My demi god exes?” You start to laugh. “You think the can or will save you?”
He nods.
“Oh you poor unfortunate soul. That’s not going to happen. You see, I can control the elements and well all that lovely Thunder can be rendered useless with a snap of my fingers. I’m also the mother of magic. Only one close to me is Freya. Loki’s magic technically stems from me.”
You turn to the blonde Adonis and dark prince with a smile. “I wouldn’t do anything to you without just cause. You know that.” You send them a wink and they beam a smile your way.
“Doll, he’s starting to turn red.” Bucky states.
“Oops.” You loosen the pressure on his windpipe but keep your hand firmly in place around his thick and bleeding neck.
“I think it’s due time for you to retire to your wing for the night Captain. Wouldn’t want anything to happen to you that can’t be reversed.”
You take a step back, releasing him. Watching as he clutches his neck. Eyes brimming with hurt and anger.
You lean forward and run your tongue along an errant trail of his life force. Making sure he watches as you trace it along your lips, before pulling it into your mouth and swallowing. With the snap of your crimson covered fingers all traces of blood disappear.
“Now run along. And remember,” You step forward so that you may whisper in his ear. “This was but a warning. It would more than please me for you to fuck around and find out what I would do if you slight what is mine again.” You place a kiss to his cheek and return to your White Wolf.
Everyone watches on as he huffs and puffs. Stomping towards the elevators.
Everyone except for Bucky. He only has eyes for you.
He pulls you down to straddle his lap. You can feel exactly what that little display of your power used against his best friend did to him pushing against his zipper. His flesh hand grips your hip tightly as his metal thumb runs along your bottom lip. “Say goodnight to our friends, Doll.”
“Why? Steve’s gone. We can enjoy the rest of our evening in peace now.”
“Say goodnight, георгин. Unless you want our friends to see you get fucked stupid.”
You bite your lip and maintain eye contact with his steel greys. “Goodnight, Earth’s mightiest.”
He grips your thighs tight and rises from his seat. Heading for the elevators. “Tony, up the sound proofing for our floor. Oh and can you funnel the audio to my Asshole best friends room as well.”
“Damn that’s pouring lemon and salt into the wound.” Clint quips.
Tony messes with a screen on his watch for a moment. “Done and done terminator. Try not to break too much furniture this time please. I’m gonna have to start a tab soon with you two.”
Before the elevator doors can fully close you shout out. “What’s the fun in that!”
#poc reader#steve rogers x reader#thor x reader#loki x reader#thor smut#loki smut#bucky barnes x reader
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Eff Being Friends
Steve Rogers x POC!Goddess!Avenger!Reader “Ci”
? x POC!Goddess!Avenger!Reader “Ci”
Ex!Thor x POC!Goddess!Avenger!Reader "Ci”
Ex!Loki x POC!Goddess!Avenger!Reader "Ci”
Wordcount: 4191
Summary:
To say the relationship between Steve and I was complicated would be an understatement. But I’m not the one to blame. That honor goes to Captain Indecision, himself. So why would he ever think I would make things easy for him?
Warnings:
18+ Only MDNI, Angsty with some mild smut and surprise feels.
Notes:
Heavily inspired by “Fuck Being Friends” by Jessie Reyes. I have this need to fuck with Steve. Also there be a twist abound. Who could the mystery person be?
Banner by @cafekitsune Divider by @firefly-graphics
Your off and on relationship with one Steven Grant Rogers, is once again off. This hot and cold shit is for the birds. If it weren’t for his dick game being almost magical you would have written him off a long time ago. Well that and you might possibly be in love with the fucker too.
When he’s not self-conscious and feeding into his own paranoia, things are great. It’s when he lets his intrusive thoughts and the opinions of others guide him that things take a turn.
Like when he starts acting a fool now that Thor is on the compound for a visit with Loki. Both of whom are technically your exes but as you’re gods you don’t hold the same morality standards when it comes to multiple partners. You were actively hooking up with both of them at the same time, ages ago.
It may have even become a bit of a competition between the brothers at one point.
So why should you shy away from all the wonderful flirty banter and not so innocent exchanges being thrown your way. Steve needs a reminder that you’re not from this realm and he can’t toy with you as such. Just because you’ve put up with his bullshit thus far, does not mean you will continue too.
Being green with envy serves him right.
Continue: ao3 tumblr
#poc reader#steve rogers x reader#thor x you#thor x reader#thor smut#loki x reader#loki smut#bucky barnes x reader
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My first impression of the Ikemen Villains guys:
[Disclaimer: I know nothing about these characters asides from the descriptions shared around Tumblr. I probably won't play the game any time soon considering that its being first released in Japanese, so unless it later on gets released in English, I won't play. Also this post is partially a joke, don't take me too seriously.]
William Rex
He gives off a more "evil, avoid at all costs, worldwide disaster" vibe than Gilbert ever did. My first thought upon seeing him was, "omg- Vlad???" But then I read his description and thought, "ohhh. So Vlad, but evil. Like if Vlad and Motonari had a baby..."
Harrison Gray
First thought, "yo, Edgar, what are you doing here??" Like bro does look like Edgar, even his description screams Edgar to me. I've seen others compare him with Nokto, but I havent paid much attention to Nokto so maybe thats why I cant see it? Idk. But yeah, I guess since Ikerev is over, Edgar had to find a new profession :/
Liam Evans
Omg, look. Loki grew up, he's a big kid now!
Idk how to really react to this one? Like, ok, he's got the chesire cat curse or whatever, he looks a bit like Loki, ..and he's supposed to be sexy? I mean, I see the vibe they were going for. But if they try to shove that "drop-dead gorgeous" or "sexy ladies man" shit down our throats like they did with Yoshimoto and Shingen in Ikesen (could also probably find other examples in the other games..) then I might end up hating him.
ALSO HIS POSE AND SORTA HIS OUTFIT REMINDS ME OF YVES-
Elbert Greetia
Omg its Chevalier but if he was actually angsty. Or maybe it's just Lancelot.
Ok- so its mostly like the hair that screams both Lancelot and Chevalier to me. Its Lancelot's style but Chev's color. And the eyes could easily be a mix of both-
But he also kinda reminds me of Satan from Obey Me, with the whole "obsessively collects beautiful things and leaves them untidy in his room." That's literally Satan but with books, but Satan also likes beautiful things.
Alfons Slyvatica
Omg is that Sebastian Michaelis?? (Im sorry- Ive never even seen Black Butler, I'll go home now-)
Idk. Ive seen others compare him to like, Jean but evil. I look at him and see Sebastian Michaelis. Or maybe like, Kicho because of the hair. But then the line "With his consistent dishonesty, he teases you, but-" makes me think of, strangely, Mitsuhide?
Roger Barel
I've seen other compare him to Jin. I look at him and see Loid Forger. Which funny enough, his VA, Eguchi Takuya, also voices Loid Forger-
Its mostly the hair style, and the face, and the glasses- like if he was blonde, with blue (is it blue-? Or does Loid have green-?) eyes then he'd look even more like Loid. I cant really think of any ikemen series characters he reminds me of, at least not appearance. But with the part in his description that says "An egoist who seems rational and will go to any lengths for his own research." makes me think of Faust for some reason..
Jude Jazza
He doesnt immediately remind me of anyone. Ive seen comparisons to Clavis and Silvio, which kinda makes sense? I guess I could see it. The uhh "A twisted man, he has a promise he wants to fulfill and a sullen heart." at first made me think of Mitsuhide. But then I remembered the definition of sullen and that doesnt fit Mitsu. But I guess the having many enemies and being seen as a cold-blooded person who loves the despair and misfortune of others DOES fit Mitsuhide, at least on the surface. Idk. Im bad at analysis like this.
But also like- I share a birthday with this man. Like the exact same date, Dec. 13. So im gonna end up HATING him.
Ellis Twilight
His appearance doesnt really remind me of anyone right away. But his description of being somewhat disturbing yet kind and gentle to everyone, being strangely obsessed with other people's "Happiest Moments in Life" and the having a "love" that he wants to prove makes me think of Charles.
But like, the opposite. Because Charles wants someone to love him, while it seems like Ellis wants to prove his love to someone? So... Charles but emo.
Victor
So.. A lot of people speculate he's the one who put the curses on the others, because his own curse is scratched out. Like we cant read it. Some have compared him to Sariel, because he's like the guide in the game. But also uhh- sorta reminds me of Amon. Maybe its the long hair (probably is).
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Silhouettes In the Spotlight - Bucky Barnes - Ten
Summary: Bucky Barnes has worked immensely hard to have a filmography expanding across genres and garnering accolades from critics, peers and fans. Y/N Y/L/N, with her debut novel (fan-fiction turned New York Times Bestseller) has two other best sellers under her belt. Next is her highly anticipated fourth book lined up for release. SHEILD Productions has acquired the film rights to her debut novel and they want Bucky Barnes to play the lead (aka himself) by any means necessary. This story is about angst, lust, heartbreak, and love. After all fairytales only exist in books and movies right?
Warnings: fluff, making out angst, swearing, towards reader: non consensual touching (not sexual in nature but still non consensual is non consensual), physical abuse, degrading language, non consensual photography. heavy chapter if these themes bother you please do not read the chapter, alexander pierce is a shit head or worse, brock rumlow too, i have demarcated the areas where the non consensual touching begins and ends.
Pairing: Actor!Bucky Barnes x Plus Size!Fem!Reader
Word Count: 7.6k || Dividers: @firefly-graphics
Main Masterlist || Fic Masterlist || AO3
Chapter Nine|| Chapter Eleven
HEADLINES:
Alexander Pierce Visits Dolores In Rehab Centre.
Natasha Romanoff Hopeful To Find The Next Doll, Maria Hill Joins Search For Auditions to Re-Open.
Author Y/N Spotted First Time Amid Break-up Rumours With Steve Rogers, Fans Attack Her Social Media.
Steve Rogers Jets Off To Europe. Top Ten Places To Visit To Get Over Break-Up Blues.
British GQ Announces Cover Star Bucky Barnes, Shoot To Take Place This Month.
Hydrangeas Publishing and SHEILD Productions Still In A War Over Buy-out, Authors Suffer As Work Is Pushed Back But Deadlines Aren’t Eased.
On-lookers Say Loki and Ace Spotted Getting Closer. Enemies To Lovers Or Just A Fling?
Bucky wonders if he’s dreaming, he really does as his hands run over your head along your back as you burrow closer. Your breathing soothed, sleepily seeking more of his warmth as laughter rumbles at your adorable behaviour.
“What’s so funny?” You question, muffled by his shirt.
“Not funny, endearing.” He corrects, you raise your head, chin resting on his sternum looking up at him.
“You’re thinking.” You muse, narrowing your eyes.
“Observant.” He chuckles, crinkles by his eyes appearing.
“Tell me?” You try to sit up, his hold tightens, “James,” you giggle, his left palm cups your cheek, the cooler thumb brushing over your cheekbone.
“I’m thinking, is this what Rhys felt, when he saw his Doll in reality? When he finally felt her against his body? Did he ask himself over and over, is this a dream? Is this a dream?” He watches you absorbing his words, blue eyes searching your own.
You press a soft kiss to his palm, his eyelids flutter closed, you place a kiss to his wrist. Bucky’s breath hitches.
You kiss the inside of his forearm, the way you can manage with his right arm still caging you in, when you reach the crease of his elbow, you look up at him. His gaze trained upon you.
“Doll reminded Rhys, that this is their reality, every-time either one of them questioned if they are still in a dream the other showed them, with each touch, with each syllable of love, with each kiss. That this is their reality.” You watch as his eyes turn glassy.
“And how do we remind each other?” His voice a soft whisper, “In the chaos of this life I lead, of these flashes and spotlights that surround you and I?”
“Those bright flashes, that spotlight that shines upon you, the shuttering chaos that waits for your brand new, when you just hold my hand and then my fingers intertwine, we’re just two silhouettes in the spotlight, together we’ll remind, that those bright lights that illuminate, only make me see you more clearly.” You tell him.
“We’re two silhouettes in the spotlight, they don’t see you like I do, they don’t know how easily I’ve given my heart to you.” Bucky admits, you turn misty eyed. He chuckles, wiping the stray tear.
“Might be coming for your job, Feather.” He jokes you give him a watery grin.
Then hide away into his chest again. Bucky wraps his arms around you, kissing the top of your head.
Your thumb brushes over the material of his shirt. Contemplating sharing your other book idea since you feel no urge to write the one you’re currently supposed to publish.
That draft lay abandoned since weeks.
“Whats on your pretty mind?” Bucky coaxes you out of your reverie.
“Well I had another idea for a book…” You begin, he frowns as your body tenses.
“Feather, why are you nervous?” He questions.
“I’m scared about the idea and how it will be received.” You admit.
“Well tell me, I want to know.” He urges, “You know I love the stories you’ve shared. Biggest fan right here even though I was terribly late to the fandom.” He clicks his tongue and the lil scrunched up face he makes has you giggle.
“Well it’s about, this twenty six year old and a forty year old…” you watch him.
“Quite the age gap but nothing to bat an eye too much at you know?” Bucky shrugs, “Are they in love?”
“Well, he’s her father’s best friend… the dad and he met when—,”
Incessant ringing has you pause, Bucky looks towards the table where your phone is the number is unknown,
“Why does he not understand I don’t want to talk to him?” You grumble.
“You think it’s Steve?” Bucky reaches for the device.
“I know it’s him.” You huff, he answers the call still, putting it on speaker phone.
“Y/N.” Steve’s voice greets you, “Please talk to me.” His words are slurred, “Did you send me to voicemail again? Fuck.” Clanging of bottles and a shatter occurs.
Bucky worries and you look up at him, “Steve?”
There is a hiss, “Why won’t you talk to me? Am I that bad?”
“Steve are you alright? Where are you?” You question.
“Why don’t I dislike you? Why are you in every goddamn thought of mine? Was the fucking same when Bucky and I had our fall out. Is he with you?” There is a sniffle.
“Steve, please tell me where are you?” You plead, you don’t want him hurting himself.
“Steve,” Bucky’s own throat is tight with emotion.
“Bucky?” Steve whispers, “I’m a horrible friend aren't I? Parading around your details and having a thing for your girl.” Steve gives a humourless laugh.
“Steve are you at home?” Bucky questions, “Just tell us we’ll come get you.”
“You’d bring her? I want to apologise for being a shit, a shit head.” Steve drawls voice thickening.
“She call you that? First meeting grumbled it under her breath but I heard it.” Steve chuckles.
“She called me a knob head once.” Bucky adds, you glare at him.
“I don’t think this is the time to discuss—,”
“I see her in my dreams you know? Picked up her book, the one with the guy who lets her get away and then returns years later as her bodyguard?”
“Steve I think you’re muddling all the books.” You look at the phone in concern, Bucky prompts you to ask Steve again.
“Steve? Where would we be if I came in your dreams right this minute?” You wonder if the tactic will work. Bucky hands you your jacket while grabbing his own.
“We’d be in my penthouse, you’d like the view from here, city lights and limitless sky.” He chuckles, then sighs as if he just took another sip.
“I know where it is.” Bucky takes your hand as the two of you head to the stairwell to not lose the connection of the call.
“That sounds nice.” You say, “Steve you have to talk to me, I need to know that you’re okay.”
“Just palm hurts, sliced it on glass, s’nothing.” He dismisses your sound of concern.
“Can I ask you something?” He wonders, sounding childlike, hopeful.
You and Bucky settle into his other car. The one he uses to remain undetected.
“You can, go on.” You prompt, Bucky intertwines your hands over the console.
“Why didn’t you and your mom leave him? Why did the two of you suffer? I’m asking because it took a long time for me too. I stayed cause I thought I could protect Mum by taking the hits for her.” He sniffles, your heart breaks for him.
“You know what she did? She would purposefully call me in, so she could be saved. She threw me under the bus. Your mum isn’t like that, she shielded you.” His voice cracks, Bucky squeezes your hand.
“I-I don’t know Steve, I never had the resources before and when I got them I knew I needed more and mom needed me.” You admit, “I wish I could have left with her earlier.”
Bucky’s jaw tightens it pains him to hear your say this, you spilled everything over the course of time from your mutual confession.
“Do you miss him? I miss mine, the good parts when I was younger.” Steve admits, you hear liquid sloshing.
“Steve, you gotta stop drinking man.” Bucky tells him, worry lacing his voice.
“I can handle it, your the one who can’t handle lick, lick-kurrrr.” Steve laughs, Bucky shakes his head.
“Yeah I’m a total lightweight.” He admits.
“Yeah you are, punk.” Steve agrees.
“You’re the punk.” Bucky reiterates.
A moment of silence settles over them, you can hear the breathing on the end of the line. Bucky’s grip tightens on the wheel and your hand.
“I miss you, Buck.” Steve admits.
“I miss you, Stevie.” Bucky says, without hesitation.
You watch him, he swallows. You squeeze his hand.
Steve cuts the call just as the two of you enter the basement parking. Bucky guides you through the familiar path to the penthouse.
Bucky reaches behind the succulent handing near the window next to the door, the key hidden under the fake plant.
Bucky takes a deep inhale as you both enter the apartment. It’s dimly lit, the television casting a glow across the living room, the glass crunches underneath your shoe. Steve’s head snaps up.
“Y/N?” He blinks several times, Bucky comes to stand behind you and Steve’s gaze shifts to him.
“Bucky?” Steve places weight on his right palm, then winces.
“Shit.” Steve looks at the cut as it drips across his forearm.
“First Aid’s in the kitchen if he hasn’t moved it, get him to sit up on the couch?” Bucky requests and you both part.
“Steve, you need to sit on the couch.” You move closer he only looks up at you.
“Oh you’re here, m'eudail.” Steve reaches for your hand with his uninjured one.
“Steve I need you to sit up on the couch.” You tug on his hand.
“M’eudail listen, I need to tell you I’m sorry.” He kneels then stands swaying you grab his arms to help steady him. Yet you sway with him.
“Steve sit, I’ll listen please just sit.” You urge, you look away to see if Bucky’s on his way back.
Steve grasps your chin, making you face him, “Steve,”
His lips brushing against yours, “Please.” he pleads. Your hands raise to push at his chest.
“Steve, I’m with James—,” his lips cut you off and then he’s flung back. Bucky’s fist connecting with his face. Steve doubles over, palm covering the injured area. He groans pressing himself into the couch.
“James.” You grab his hand, Bucky turns to you, walking you to the edge of the room.
His thumb runs over your lips, you look up at him.
“Don’t defend him.” He warns you.
“I’m not, are you okay?” You question.
“You better hope this doesn’t bruise.” Steve groans.
“Get over it.” Bucky calls out, eyes not leaving yours, you look at his chest.
“I’m sorry.” You look back up at him.
“You have nothing to apologise for, Feather.” He assures you.
“That guy on the other hand, his list just increases.” Bucky sighs, pressing his forehead to yours, you close your eyes.
Footsteps pad closer and then fade, you heard the sounds of Steve hurling. You wince. Bucky sighs.
“Stay here.” He requests, and moves to one of the rooms shutting the door.
You stand for a total of one minute before carrying the bottles into the kitchen, trying to find the broom to gather the glass before it hurts anyone else or Steve again.
Bucky walks out as you’re sweeping the glass into the outer carton of a Whiskey bottle.
“He’s okay, threw up given the consumption, the forearm gash isn’t too deep.” He explains, moving to the sliding closet and retrieves the dustpan.
“You spent a lot of time here?” You as as he takes the broom from you.
“Starting of our careers he and I, with our first big endorsement bought this place,”
“And then he sold his half to me after the accident but before things went downhill.” Steve walks in rubbing his bloodshot eyes, some how seeming soberer.
He shuffles into the kitchen, Bucky and you finish putting the glass in the trash to find Steve sipping the coffee mug while staring at the bandage on his palm.
“You both can leave.” He says, Bucky rolls his eyes, “Don’t roll your eyes at me.”
“You still have all the stupid with you.” Bucky grumbles, you glance between them.
“Bucky—,” Steve turns and his eyes shift to you.
“I’m sorry about what I did. It was shitty and non consensual and me being drunk isn’t an excuse or a reason. I, I’m sorry.” He looks away and then back at you.
“Steve, that was really crappy.” You swallow down the lump in your throat, “Just, don’t do this stupid thing about drinking yourself to oblivion.”
He nods, taking a sip of the coffee.
“How, how are you holding up?” He asks, Bucky looks at Steve, observing the bags under his eyes and the withered look.
“I’m okay, given how things are I’m sure you heard.” You shrug.
“I’m sorry about the thing with your mom’s facility, I just, I wanted to be able to, fuck, whatever my intensions were it was shitty of me.” He sets the glass in the sink, scowling at the empty bottles.
“Don’t go down that path.” Bucky says knowingly.
A haunted look crosses Steve’s features, “I already am upon it.”
“No.” Bucky presses, he steps forward, Steve faces him.
“Just go Bucky. Take her with you, she’s better far away from me. You all are.” Steve procures another bottle.
“You’re going to keep drinking?” The words leave your lips.
“Sweetheart, just go home with your boyfriend.” Steve sneers.
You glare at Steve, he doesn’t look at your drinking straight from the bottle.
“Steve—,”
“I said leave, before I call the cops for trespassing.” He seethes cutting Bucky off.
Your phone and Bucky’s ring in tandem.
“Yelena?”
“Sam?”
“Did you use the back entrance?” Steve groans, the two of you answer the calls.
“Are you with Bucky At Steve’s?” Yelena’s voice is frantic.
“Yes?” You sound wary how did she know?
“Valentina has paps stationed outside, the security tipped her off about you.”
“I haven’t even been here!” You almost yell, Bucky’s expression is hardened as well.
Steve’s stomach flops again, “Fucking Valentina.”
“Sam’s attempting to get rid of them.” Bucky informs, “He’s told us to lay low.”
“Where here?” You ask.
“Where else sweetheart?” Steve scoffs.
“You know what you did was hurtful but this, bullshit facade of yours hurts more.” You sneer, Steve’s mouth twists into a grimace he stomps over to his room shutting the door.
Bucky sighs.
“I’ll call you back, there is something that needs taking care of,” Yelena cuts the line before you can say anything further.
When the two of you head to the living room, muffled shouting resounds from his bedroom.
“Valentina I swear if you don’t remove those fucking paps I will terminate your contract.” Steve sounds extremely calm but his voice keeps growing in octaves.
“Oh please you know I have shit on you.” She warns, “I know the shit Alexander has on you.”
“Are you threatening me? You know I’m your biggest client I drop you, you will go down as a nobody.” He warns.
“You’re too much of a chicken. Please what are you going to do?” Valentina scoffs.
“You’re fired.” He states, cutting the call, dialling his legal team.
“To what do I owe the pleasure, Rogers?” Matt Murdock chuckles.
“Matt, i’ve fired Valentina, I need a new person to fill her place and I want everything iron clad, she has a slippery tongue.” He warns.
“Understood, I’ll have everything done by the end of the day. You take care alright?” Matt requests, Steve closes his eyes.
“I will.” He affirms, closing his eyes he opens the notification tab, already tweets, messages and emails pouring in about the leaked video that cuts Bucky out and only has you move through the building lobby.
Outside Bucky winces at the articles pouring in painting you as the one who cannot let go. The fan’s opinions dwindling. Then Sam shares a link. It takes him to Steve’s page.
Bucky’s eyes widen, he taps your arm handing you the device. You raise your head from your hands.
“ @.Steve_Rogers: it has come to light that security footage from my building has leaked and been fabricated to today’s date. I apologise for the privacy invasion this has caused Y/N Y/L/N, she has endured enough on my account with fabricated tales and speculative articles into the nature of our relationship. We are co-workers nothing beyond that, she has written a brilliant book, that has achieved great accolades, and now I and my co-stars and the crew of the movie have the chance to bring her vision to life. I apologise to the fans as well, I know how all of this looks and I know most of my relationships are out in the open before I or my partner have the opportunity to decide, which is also why I have cut ties with Valentina de Fontaine. Please understand that this is a time you should be respecting Y/N Y/L/N not parading her private moments of offering to help me bring Beckham to life and twist them into a cruel jab at a relationship. Yes the pictures leaked, yes we shared a friendship. I did stupid things to fuck it up instead of being authentic. She tolerated me way beyond what she should have. Nothing more to it. Now, if any of you know a great PR rep or manager please let me know, preferably someone who doesn’t give a shit about keeping me in the headlines and gets me to do authentic work I believe in, thank you.
All of the love, S.R. ❤️”
You re-read, he disregarded everything, admitted it was false, you look up at him as he steps into the living room.
“Well you did say to find the real me.” He shrugs, Bucky shakes his head chuckling.
“You still aren’t forgiven.” You tell him.
“I know, I’ll earn it.” Steve smiles confident, “Want food while the paps clear?”
“I could do for a pizza.” Bucky pipes up, he’s satisfied seeing the bruise on Steve’s face.
“You know? Why not.” you agree.
You stare at the email, three days later. Alexander finally booked the venue for the meeting. You log it into your calendar. Yelena places a bag of take out in front of you. She had been hiding something acting shifty. You had hoped to catch her off guard but one thing about Yelena, she is never letting her guard down.
“Eat, Y/N.” She gestures with her hand.
“yeah I, I had a question.” You begin, she looks up at you, nose scrunched.
“What is it?”
“Why are you being so fidgety?” You narrows your eyes as her jaw drops and she immediately launches into being defensive.
“I am not!” She scoffs, you press your lips into a thin line.
“I don’t buy it, what is on your mind.” You question opening the bag that contains Indian food, the aroma soothing your senses.
“Then why are you so…,” You pause as she stares behind you. You turn, Steve waves from the doorway.
His attention is drawn by another worker at BW.
“Is this why you’ve been shifty?” You turn back.
“Yes.” She exhales.
“You took him on thats okay, Yelena I know you’re going to treat him better than Valentina did, you don’t have to worry about my reaction. Him being here won’t have you divert your attention from my work.” You smile when she nods.
“I didn’t know how to tell you, its just, there was so much going on at your end and well…” She just trails off, slumping back in her chair.
“I’m not handling him directly we’ve taken him on as a client.” She explains you nod while eating.
“So Alexander has sent out the invites for the dinner.” You turn the laptop around for her to read.
“The dates the same as Bucky flying out. Have you told him?” She looks at you with furrowed brows.
You nod, “James is trying to alter the flight till after the dinner meeting thing is done, Sam’s on it as well. Right now it’s coinciding with him boarding the plane.”
You recalled the tension that rolled off of Bucky’s body the minute you mentioned this meeting. He hadn’t told you much about his own interactions with Alexander but you knew there was a-lot more to it. You just hoped to where your mind wandered wasn’t true. It was easy to think of horrible things.
You stared at the email again, it seemed daunting the only thing getting you by was that other authors would be there too.
Sam’s phone clatters on the glass he glares at it. Bucky groans throwing his own phone at the couch, it bounces and lands on the carpet with a thud.
They don’t need to affirm what they already know. The tickets and dates aren’t changing.
“I have a bad feeling.” Bucky says, the entire meeting thing has left a deep gnawing and clawing feeling in his chest. He doesn’t want Alexander to have something to hold over your head.
Given how Alexander behaved when Bucky broke his PR relationship contract. He had a sinking feeling that you were going to be used against him. When it didn’t happen he stupidly allowed himself to feel relief and then the email came in, the meeting was on the same day but after he was being flown out.
“What is the next step? Slip a recording bug in her bag?” Sam questions, “Hire a bodyguard?”
Bucky covers his face with his palms, “Isn’t Steve an old Hydrangeas author? Also Loki they reached out to Loki.”
Bucky bolts towards his phone dialling Loki’s number.
“Hey mate.” Loki greets, “How are you?”
“Loki, hey,” Bucky wonders if this would work.
“What’s wrong? Did something happen with Y/N?” He sits up, “Are you okay?”
“No, she’s okay, it’s, did you ever go through the deal with Hydrangeas? You know they reached out for you to come on as an author right?” His friend hums at the question.
“They did but then the whole buy out thing happened so I never got on board, not that I would have, why?” Loki frowns, Bucky wasn’t seeming as himself.
Bucky sighs, then begins to explain, Loki grows worried.
“Wait did you say British GQ?” He confirms, “The just announced Steve as a special coverage too.”
“What?” Bucky looks to Sam, “GQ Steve.”
“On it.”
“Look, I’m in New York send me the address and I’ll keep a watch okay? He doesn’t have shit on me that the world doesn’t already know.” Loki assures.
“Thanks mate I’ll send the address to you. I’m sorry to drag you into this mess.”
“Mate, Y/N is as much of a friend to me as I am to her, even without you two being together I would take care of her no questions asked.” Loki assures yet again.
“Thank you.” Bucky’s voice is thick with emotion, he knows how hard it has been for you to form friendships as these, the way you cried to him with tears of joy when you realised how everyone was there for you came out in support of you.
“You don’t know how much this means to her and me.” He adds.
“Bucky, she means a lot to us as well. Now go, I’ll have everything sorted here.” Loki smiles as they bid each other good-bye.
Bucky cuts the call Sam looks up at him, “Steve and you are on the same flight.”
He presses his lips into a thin line.
Something doesn’t feel right.
There is a private entrance to the airport that high profile individuals utilise to avoid being spotted as well as priority boarding after persons with different abilities.
Bucky turns to you as Hayden places the car into park moving out to unload his bags. Giving the two of you another few moments to cherish.
“You have the pepper spray?” He questions again.
“I do,” you show him and tuck it into your purse again.
He cups your cheek, the feeling in his stomach knots further.
“James.” You look into his eyes, “I will be alright.”
“I know I just; I’m going to miss you.” He swallows down, eyes searching through yours, you give him a smile.
He strokes your cheek, “I’ve been meaning to say this earlier I regret not saying it earlier but I was worried that it might be too soon, but then again maybe I’ve been feeling this way for far longer.”
Your lips part, he gives you a soft smile.
“I love you, Feather.” He declares, the four words wrap around your heart.
“Oh, James,” You inch closer to him, your lips brushing over his, “I love you, James.”
Your confession a whisper against his lips that brands itself onto his being.
He pulls your face closer, his lips on yours everything else in the world fades away.
His hands move to your hips pulling you across his lap, the grin blooming across his face between the kisses the two of you share.
“I’m the happiest man in the world today, Feather.” He admits, you nuzzle into the crook of his neck, his palm running over your head.
“I wish you didn’t have to go.” You murmur, pressing a kiss to his jaw.
“I wish I didn’t either.” He admits, he kisses your shoulder, your scent taking over him.
The two of you remain embraced till Sam taps on the tinted window, “We have to move, I’m sorry to cut this short. Steve’s here too.”
You shift away, but not before Bucky gives you another searing kiss. Even as he opens the door to leave Bucky bends back inside, he grabs your hand bringing it close to his lips and placing a kiss to the tattoo he adores.
“Take care of yourself for me, I’ll be back in three days okay? I love you.” He cups your cheek again.
“I love you too. Come back soon, take care of yourself for me.” You place a kiss to his palm, he smiles.
Hayden enters the car again, you watch as Bucky, Sam, Steve and his new manager make their way into the airport.
“Shall we head out Ma’am? The Hotel your event is at is about an hour away.” Hayden meets your misty eyed gaze through the rearview mirror.
“Hayden,”
“Ma’am, he’ll be back before you know it.” He assures, you nod, taking the tissue he offers.
“Thank you.”
Bucky sighs as you inform him of the sudden venue change, you made it in time, given as the hotel was closer to the previous venue.
It’s fifteen minutes till he has to board the plane.
The knots in his stomach only tighten he’s in half a mind to give up the cover page. Loki’s been updated about the venue change but the message isn’t read nor delivered and his phone is unavailable. He traces the path to the exit with his gaze.
He should leave, his limbs push to have him rise from his chair.
“I thought you’d bring her along.” Steve muses while sitting down next to him.
“I wanted to but she has this meeting with every other Hydrangeas author and Alexander.” Bucky watches the blonde man’s brows furrow.
Bucky’s heart sinks at Steve’s next words,
“Bucky, that meeting was cancelled this afternoon.” Steve says while pulling up the email on his phone.
The words blur, “Steve she’s still invited, she’s on her way to meet him.”
“Boarding call for Delta Airlines JFK to LHR.”
Steve’s features set into a harsh glare, Bucky begins moving to the exit, “I’m not getting on that plane.”
“No you are not.” Steve agrees following him.
NON CONSENSUAL SCENE BEGINS
There isn’t any welcome sign or guidance line to where the meeting is as you enter the hotel lobby. You had told Hayden he could take the night off since getting back home from here was easier.
You message Bucky that you’ve reached and tuck in your phone when the manager stands in front of you.
“Ms. Y/L/N, I presume?” He speaks in a gentle manner.
“Yes, um, am I late?” You question worriedly.
“On the contrary Mr. Pierce is delayed he has asked me to take you to the presidential suite.” He gestures towards the lift.
“I, won’t the others be there for the meeting?” You ask while following.
“You’re the first one here. The suite is equipped with a private conference room.” He explains and you step behind him of the elevator.
“Oh, okay.” You tap your foot to the elevator music.
The doors open directly into the presidential suite, you follow behind to the meeting room, the chairs are lined up around an oval white marble table. Bottles of water kept along with notepads and pens.
The manager pulls out a chair for you, you thank him as you sit.
“Would you care for refreshments? Any drinks?” He questions, you shake your head.
“Water is fine, you reach for the bottle, taking a few large gulps, his walkie beeps, he excuses himself from the suite.
You wait for a few more minutes sighing as you head towards the window, taking a few more gulps of the water and reaching for a second bottle. The sudden thirst you’re attributing to nerves, you place the bottle down.
“Ah, I see you made it.” Alexander grins like a cheshire cat.
You turn, “Oh, hello Sir— Alexander.” he smiles as you greet him.
“Ah come along I wanted to hold a mixer out on the foyer, no idea why Stuart brought you in here.” Alexander beckons you towards him with the flex of his fingers. You push away from the window, the floor tilts, you stumble propping yourself up with the back of the chair.
“Are you alright sweetheart?”
You look up at him, he’s smiling, you blink, his features morph into worry. Nodding you take the support of the wall blinking several times to clear your vision. When you reach the doorway you fall forward again, the floor shakes.
You groan as you’re picked up, large arms wrap around your waist. You shuffle in the tight grasp.
“Brock put her on the sofa and get rid of the jacket.” Alexander orders, taking off his own suit jacket and cufflinks.
Brock places you on the large sectional, when his hands move to your jacket you grab his hands, “Please no.” You plead, alarms ringing in your head and the vibrations of the floor don’t stop.
“Her, phone’s going off, it’s Barnes.” Brock says, looking up at his uncle.
“Throw it to the side.” He huffs, a clatter resounds as the vibrating floor stops, you stare up at Brock, trying to push his hands away. Brock pins your hands above your head.
“James won’t let you—,”
“Shh, sweetheart, you and I are going to take some very interesting photos. James is on his way to be far, far away from you.” Alexander’s palm cups your cheek.
You pull your head away, he grabs your jaw harshly, you cry out. Distantly fabric rips and Alexander’s weight is above you as he nastily grins at you.
“Oh look at you, crying. Oh sweetheart, you should have thought of this before you tried to get in the way of my entire plan. My best actors and you? Have you seen the mirror?” He laughs wickedly, there is a bright flash, you cry out at the sting on your cheek that follows.
“Dip your head down.” Brock tells him, Alexander’s breath fans across your neck, you struggle against him.
“Fucking bitch, I’m not even touching you. Who would want to? Certainly not my actors, they are toying with you. Shiny little toy, they ran after Dolores the same way.”
Your eyes close at his words, you can’t feel your limbs anymore, disorientation taking over.
He grabs your hand, making your fingers move close to his mouth you catch a flash of your tattoo before Alexander takes them in his mouth, you will yourself to kick or pull your hand back, his teeth clamp around your index finger you cry out at the pain.
“Fucking bitch. I will make sure no one hires you, or publishes you. I will even ruin your little Barnes’ career. At least him I used well, didn’t I Brock?” Alexander chuckles.
Brock’s laugh echoes around your mind.
“Don’t, don’t hurt James.” you cry as his fingers twist your wrist, the dizzying feeling as you’re turned around.
“Maybe I should tell you what I have on Steve then, you’re going to forget all of this, and I’ll remind you.” he chuckles darkly, you see the flash against the upholstery.
“Little toy of SHEILD, thats what we should call you, fat fucking toy, your followers, your fans, all increased because of my company. I bought Hydrangeas already, I leaked your chapters, you will be SHEILD to buy your book rights, I’ll earn a profit you get nothing. Just the way I milked your precious James’ arm loss.”
You can hear him but your tears seem louder as he tells you the vile things he did to the two of them, the drugs, the women, the compromising pictures with everything.
You cry out as he pulls you up then pushes you down to the floor. You struggle to remain on your knees as he has you face him.
“Was supposed to be Steve losing his arm, fucker was becoming a liability, then Barnes stepped in with his improvisation. Maybe I should hurt him again. Or should I hurt Steve?” Alexander’s ring bruises your cheek. “Answer me.”
“Please don’t hurt them! Please don’t hurt them! I’ll do anything.” You plead.
“You open your mouth and you see what I do to you.” Alexander warns, throwing you back, you curl up on your side, black spots cloud your vision.
“Anyways once your little boy toys know what occurred they won’t touch you. Who will believe that you didn’t sleep with me, you were the one that wanted to rise above. No one. Who will believe that I, Alexander Pierce drugged you? No one. Who will believe a little author who lied to everyone about her father not being an abusive man but displayed every bit of it in her book? No one will believe you. When I’ve produced movies and best selling sagas, your story is in my hand as well. You’re a liar, a fraud, no one will believe a silly pathetic girl that makes up stories for a living.” Alexander pats your wet cheek.
Brock takes a final picture the white flash bleeds into blackened darkness.
NON CONSENSUAL SCENE ENDS
The ding of the lift and silence of six minutes echoes around the rental car. Sam drives as swiftly as possible. Steve’s gaze is trained on his phone that was video recording Bucky’s device. Bucky was shaking, anger rolling off of him in waves.
“Yelena?” Steve’s new manager, Angel’s, voice cuts through the silence, “We need Barber and Murdock. It’s Y/N, something happened, just get them at BW private meeting no paps nothing. Off books. You need to go get her, she’s shaken up. Medical team as well.”
Your sobs break free, Bucky’s heart bleeds, “Feather.” he says.
“James?” your voice breaks off more.
“Feather I’m coming to get you okay? I, I need you to talk to me, are you hurt?” Bucky will kill them, he’s going to kill Alexander and Brock.
“Do-don’t I’m, I’m not, I’m not—,”
“Feather, please, please, don’t believe a word he says, I believe you.” He assures, you cry harder over the call, there is shuffling across the line.
“You didn’t go?” you whimper, bringing the watch closer to your face.
“I’ll explain when I get there okay?” he sounds broken, hearing everything that was done to him and Steve.
“Don’t come here. I’ll, I’ll meet you at home, please.”
“Baby—,”
“I don’t want to be here.” You plead, “please.”
“I’ll call Hayden for you.” he says.
“I gave him the night off.” You inform, “I, I thought he would—, there should have been others…”
“Yelena is on it.” Angel assures, “She’ll reach in a few minutes.”
“Did you hear everything? It the call’s on the watch…” You wonder when did the call dial or get answered during the struggle. He sighs, he doesn’t know how to answer this question.
“Who-Who else heard?” You sniffle, your shirt was in tatters, the buttons half popped off.
“Feather…” Bucky winces, “Steve, Angel and Sam.”
“We’ll make him pay, Y/N.” Steve’s voice is gruff a little scratchy, the whole ordeal lasted thirty minutes, how did the call get answered they don’t understand but Steve began recording the device with his own phone.
“We can’t, he’ll ruin your careers. He threatened to hurt, hurt you, he said more but I, I was drowning?” you try to make them understand.
“Nothing is more important than you.” Bucky says, his vibranium arm whirs as his fist is tightly clenched.
“Alpine and Mum, the nurse…” You being to panic again,
“I’ll have someone relieve the other nurse and say you’re caught up okay?” Steve assures you, “Angel, call the nursing facility please, an email from them has the contact information.
“I’m not going to stop, Feather. We’re going to make him pay.” Bucky assures, you whimper.
“You, you tried to warn me, I should have said no.” You begin to cry again.
“This is not your fault, you were misled. This was planned by them, you are not at fault.” Bucky assures you, he swallows thickly.
You take a deep inhale, the elevator dings, “Someone’s come back,” you hide away the watch behind your back, cowering against the sectional. Pulling your jacket to cover your form.
Yelena comes finds you on the floor she drops her bags as you arms wrap around her, you begin to cry, “I’ll have her back at BW.” Yelena spots the ongoing call on the watch.
“Have change of clothes for you, your hoodie.” She explains, “I thought maybe it was a spill…”
You shake your head, she helps you wear the hoodie. Your limbs wobble, “He had something in the water in the conference room.”
Steve and Bucky share a glance, they were familiar with the laced drug.
“Yelena, get the bottles.” Steve says over the speaker phone.
You follow her not wanting to be alone, she grabs the half empty bottle and the empty bottle and a third sealed one.
She takes your hand, leading you to the basement parking. You numbly follow her, getting into her car.
Bucky paces the entirety of the BW office, his head snapping up to the entrance every time he hears footsteps. Steve watches him while he replays the audio for Matt and Andy.
Matt’s lips press into a thin line as the call progresses for a second time. Your cries for no and help have your voice hoarse.
Andy scribbles the time stamps across a piece of paper. Noting down everything that was occurring via the audio. Every word where you pleaded for a no, or asked them to stop marked. His breathing trying to remain in control. The anger towards men like Alexander only growing.
The audio ends, Steve looks towards both of them.
“We need to tread with this very carefully. It is non consensual, she repeats over and over, he also admits to incriminating things he has done to you and Mr. Barnes.” Matt lists, “Andy you need to work rationally not with anger.”
“I know what I’m doing Matt.” Andy huffs, “We can build a case. However this needs to be off books and off records. The main thing is she’s shaken, if she says no, we cannot do anything.”
“What do you mean? We have to do something!” Steve yells.
“Mr. Rogers, please understand, till the victim does not file the complaint, there is nothing we can do.” Matt sighs.
“Andy come on.” Steve looks at the man helplessly.
“I can’t do anything Steve, we can talk to her, assure her that this will be dealt with without harm to either you or Mr. Barnes but if she says no, that it a full sentence.” Andy looks at Steve who only gets more irritable.
“You need to cool off before she comes in.” Andy advises his brother, “She needs rational and calmness right now.”
Steve only grumbles under his breath.
His head snaps up as Bucky and you meet halfway, he lifts you up as you wrap around him, your sobs greet everyone. As you hold on for dear life to Bucky.
Bucky runs his hand over your head, leading you to Yelena’s office, the three seater couch allowing you to lay on Bucky as he holds you. Apologies fall from both of your lips, he kisses your tears away while shedding his own.
“I managed to get a hold of Loki.” Sam walks into the conference room, “He ordered a drink in the hotel lobby. Woke up right now.”
“He was drugged as well?” Steve looks towards Andy.
Andy’s lips press into a thin line he notes this down as well, “We need him to come in, I’ve got Dr Banner and Dr Cho in to find DNA evidence and take blood samples. Again only if Y/N agrees.”
Steve pushes the nearest chair and it topples over, he rests his palms against the wall trying to curb his anger.
“He’ll hurt the two of you.” You say for the umpteenth time sitting in the conference room to discuss how to go about this whole situation.
“Feather, we have him threatening you over us. He cannot do shit.” Bucky cups your cheeks, you weren’t leaving his side to afraid to be alone. The scent of his cologne calming you.
“It will all come to light.” You say, “What about that?”
“It anyways would if we did a misstep with Alexander.” Steve says from his place to your left.
“Exactly, this way they know Alexander is the bad guy.” Bucky’s thumb brushes over your cheekbone. You look down at your hands, his teeth marks left a gash over your tattoo over the exact place Bucky left his parting kiss.
Bucky’s jaw tightens as he sees the flesh marred.
“If you still do not want to, Matt and Andy will leave.” Bucky tells you and your gaze lifts to the two lawyers, Steve explained Andy and he are twins but Andy left the family and changed his last name. The information seemed like whiplash. He had kind eyes, as Steve did in some moments you had with him.
“Y/N, look the trauma you underwent tonight was horrible and I cannot provide words that may be able to comfort you,” Andy’s voice is sincere, “What I can offer is a chance to make sure Alexander and Brock never get the chance to hurt you or anyone else again.”
“We have a contact in the FBI as well, her team was investigating SHEILD for the longest time, money laundering amongst other things, we can build a case.” Matt assures, he tilts his head the glasses gleam against the light.
“He won’t be able to hurt James and Steve or anyone right?” You want to affirm.
“Yes.” Matt says, “even what he mentioned about Bucky’s accident that was scheduled for Steve.”
“We will make sure of it.” Andy adds, his gaze flickers to his brother who harbours worry towards you, Bucky’s expression holds the same worry.
“What about Bucky’s accident?” You look amongst everyone, your brows furrowed, “I, I don’t remember…”
“It’s probably the drug altering your memory.” Matt deduces.
“Don’t strain yourself trying to recall, we can take your statement afterwards as well.” Andy says, he taps his pen on the paper.
“We all are going to believe and support you, no matter the choice you make.” Bucky grasps your hand gently, Steve lightly touches your forearm.
“Look around the room,” he urges, and you do, “Bucky, Yelena, Angel, Loki, Matt, Andy, Sam and I, we are all here for you.” They all offer encouraging looks, you feel tears brim again.
“Okay, okay, I’ll file the case.” You look at the two lawyers, Matt smiles.
“Thank you.” He says.
“Hey, Darcy, I have some news.” Andy stands gazing out the window continuing his call.
“Y/N, this is Dr. Cho, she will be assessing you and documenting the injuries.” Matt announces the minute Dr. Cho steps in, “her perfume is recognisable.” he explains with a light chuckle.
“Y/N, I’m Helen Cho, I’ve step up the examining area in the other office, you can have someone accompany you.” She gives you a warm smile.
Your gaze moves towards Yelena, she nods, “Of course I will.”
You swallow standing up, looking down at Bucky.
“I love you.” he tells you kissing the back of your hand.
“I love you.” you cup his cheek brushing your thumb over his jaw.
You look back at Steve, “M’eudail, it means, my darling.” he tells you, you nod.
“Steve.” Andy warns.
“Thank you for being here, you’re a good friend.” You say to him, Steve find a weight lifted from his shoulders.
Bucky’s eyes meet his, he nods affirming and agreeing to what you said.
You meet Loki’s gaze with an apology on your tongue.
“Hey I’d get knocked out as many times for you.” The green eyed man gives you a cheeky smile.
You give him a smile and walk out with Yelena following Dr. Cho.
HEADLINES:
Steve Rogers and Bucky Barnes Get Into Public Altercation At JFK, Escorted Out By Security.
Dolores Issues Apology Statement As She Gears Up To Return From Rehab.
Loki Laufeyson Naps While Waiting For Script Read.
GQ Releases Statement Redacting Bucky Barnes and Steve Rogers From Next Month Issue, Director Brock Rumlow Chosen Instead.
Alexander Pierce Issues Statement Hydrangeas Now A Part Of SHEILD. New Name — HYDRA.
A.N.: i know this chapter a heavy scene, if anyone needs to talk my DMs are open.
Taglist is Open comment or DM to be added!
Taglist: @stevesmewmew @elle14-blog1 @crazyunsexycool @sebsgirl71479 @pandaxnienke @slutforsexyseabass @eclecticpatrolroadlawyer @pandaxnienke @vampire7595
#bucky barnes au#bucky barnes#james buchanan barnes#bucky x plus size reader#bucky x female reader#buck barnes fic#bucky barnes one shot#bucky barnes fluff#james barnes x you#bucky barnes x reader#bucky fluff#sebastian stan#bucky x yn#the winter soldier x you#frostironfudge#bucky barnes x plus size reader#james buchanan barnes x you#white wolf#bucky barnes angst#bucky is the best#bucky x reader#Bucky barnes smut#james bucky barnes#bucky fanfic#modern bucky barnes#modern au#marvel#bucky x y/n#bucky fic#hollywood au
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Loki S2E1
Really starting where we left off, aren't we? Awesome.
"I don't know you." 😭
Yesss, take a piece out of that Kang statue, will ya?
Loki's day literally just keeps getting weirder and weirder. Lmfao.
Also, Casey being an MVP.
Ayyyyy, I missed the title theme so much (she says, as if she doesn't have a Loki playlist Spotify).
Ooooh, war room. 👀
Casey and Loki are NOT having fun right now 🤣
Well, at least that one hunter is apologizing for pruning Mobius. Though, "I was just doing my job" is an awful apology.
Yeahhhh, can't deny now that Ravonna knows He Who Remains.
X-05 reminds me of Rumlow.
B-15 is so underrated. I love her.
AYYY, that went well.
The way Loki is so bent up on emotion that he's almost maniacal. The way Mobius is still trying to help him despite that.
"In order to do that, I need a Loki Who Remains." Lmao.
"I have no memory of having my memory wiped." Why would you??? Mobius, never change.
Holy shit, poor O.B. hasn't had a visitor in like four-hundred years.
The back and forth with O.B. taking to Loki and Mobius is so funny omg.
He has to get pruned again. Heh.
Shoulder bashes Mobius 😂
They bicker like an old married couple 😂
Not only are the lights flickering, they're falling. Oh boy.
"...ran diagnostics every few hundred years." Man, time really did just blur together for these guys before all this, didn't it?
"If I don't make it back..." I hate it when people say that.
Holy shit, that is a huge suit.
Sometimes I forget that Owen Wilson also played Lightning McQueen. Then there's Mobius just casually reminding me: "Get ready to see some hoofin' like you've never seen before." The nostalgia. You can't tell me he didn't improv that line 😂
THE MUSIC.
You know it's bad when they're evacuating the TVA.
"Give him more time. He can still make it." This man is such a golden retriever, I love him.
"Mobius, listen to me. There is nothing you can do for him. He's lost to time." githgoihgrhrioithj
Sylvie???????
Lmfao. He's always getting pruned during pivotal moments with her.
I almost just spat out my soda. That was so fucking funny. Poor Mobius, that looked painful
AYYY, THE END CREDIT MUSIC. I MISSED YOU.
END CREDIT SCENE.
WHAT'S UP, SYLVIE.
She does not understand fast-food restaurants.
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Small answer id that Odin is a thorki shipper
(Jk but seriously does Odin know what kingdom alliance means)
While i was spending my literally-at-least-minutes thinking about Odin's Shit Plan one thing that occurred to me was that since getting Loki actually onto that throne would probably require military support from Asgard (some people might call that "sending an occupying force to install a puppet regime to de facto annex new territory" but obviously i would never do so, ahem) then Loki actually being the heir by law wouldn't really matter at that point either way. Odin may as well send Thor to Jotunheim instead, and then when he inherits Asgard the crowns are united and no more war ever again.
In Thorki terms however what happens is Loki is sent off to Jotunheim alone and sad and weeping, with his slim willowy build and his beautiful soft hair all he has to support himself with, and Thor is like "This doesn't seem... good? He knows fuck all about Frost Giants and doesn't know anyone there and also I miss him. Not in an incest way, OBVIOUSLY. I love him as a brother, I do not crave his touch upon my broad warrior's chest."
He stands at the Bifrost angsting hotly until a dishevelled Asgardian who went off to serve with the Suddenly King Of Jotunheim shows up to say "Yeah that didn't work. Nobody believes he's Lauffey's kid and they don't want him anyway." Oh no! Thor is shooketh and aghast! SHIT JUST GOT REAL!
He grabs an eight-legged horse (it's been hanging around for a while, nobody knows where it came from - WTF 8 legs??? - but it's always reminded him a wee bit of Loki so he likes it) and he heads to Jotunheim to save his bro! Then he stops, doubles back, gathers an army and heads out again, this time properly equipped with more than optimism and love. Brotherly love and not incest love OF COURSE.
And then idk everyone fights and in the aftermath it turns out that WAS incestuous love after all I guess? Thor tells Loki that you know what our dad's a bit of a dick, sending you off like that barely supported and away from me I mean from Asgard. And Loki's like yeah he is. I hate that bastard so much now. >:(
And Thor says Well it occurs to me that one of us is the theoretical heir to Jotunheim albeit not successfully so, and the other is the heir to Asgard and like... well if dad died I'd be king of Asgard and I would totally commit all my forces to supporting you over there. Might even. You know. Marry the two kingdoms together symbolically and literally. If you'd be into that. But this plan would rely on me being king and dad might just live forever so. Ah well, it was nice idea, right?
And Loki says, I don't know if you've noticed but we've still got that army from three paragraphs ago and that leaves Asgard basically undefended and WHAT IF - I'm not saying it's a good idea but WHAT IF... we told them Odin had been replaced by like. A witch? An evil witch pretending to be him. And that we need to go there and kill him to save Asgard from him. This sounds a bit unlikely yeah but would both of Odin's sons lie about a thing like that? And if Odin isn't really Odin then you'd be king now anyway so they'd be sworn to follow you and... As I said, just an idea. We probably shouldn't do that.
And then Thor has a think about it all (which takes a while as he is slightly Stupid!Thor in this story) and then he stands up and calls out to the army who were offscreen for the intimate dialogue bit but otherwise conveniently close, "RIGHT LADS I've just heard some bad news about Odin."
#thorki#replies#i think i just stared into the abyss and the abyss stared back and told me that it loved me#i dont ship thorki really but i can see why people write fic of it and i've read some#also look how i evoked that bit in Thor where loki talks thor into an invasion while saying he didn't so that tumblr believes him#and insists for many years afterwards that the trickster character didn't trick anyone with his wordy trickstery ways
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youtube
The Loki season two trailer dropped today. Judging from the trailer, the series seems to be leaning more into the series' horror elements. I'm basing that largely on the soundtrack because I have not met a single person that isn't creeped the fuck out by theremin music, myself included. That being said this is definitely your typical horror story. It falls into the social horror genre, which is quickly becoming one of my favorite subgenres.
Social horror is a newly emerging genre of horror that examines all of the fucked shit that we as a society allow to take place simply because the mainstream says that it's ok.
In the case of the Loki series that is allowing one person to take the fall for crimes that he didn't even do and also hunting down and murdering someone simply cause they're transgender. And I know that not everyone headcannons Sylvie as trans and for those of you who don't, I have a question for you:
If Sylvie isn't trans and was simply born female, then why didn't the TVA come for her as an infant? Why would they wait until she was a child capable of complex magic and, ya know, running away?
Just a little something to think about.
It does seem as though Sylvie's story is taking the back burner in season two. Or that's how it seems in this trailer. She didn't exactly turn out to be a fan favorite among stalkerish Hiddlestoners who can't stand to see Tom have a love life even if it's an imaginary one. Or among biphobic assholes who insist that being a straight-passing relationship negates a bisexual's queerness. So it would make sense if Sylvie got less screen time, but she was also a huge part of the season one story arc.
I, personally, thought it was nice that Loki had someone who didn't exist simply to remind him of what a terrible person he was simply for existing. But it's like I said their kiss didn't really eek me out as much as it did other people cause I guess I'm desensitized. Desensitization is what happens when you watch A LOT of horror movies over a long period of time. Or when you just live through so much fucked up shit that you just stop caring.
I do have a line, though, and I don't go out of my way to read about incest and shit like that. Like there's this book called All The Ugly & Wonderful Things by Bryn Greenwood that I absolutely refuse to read because the plot is basically that this girl's life is so fucked up that the only good thing she has is an incestous relationship with her brother or someone. That's just fucking torture porn, ok? It's disgusting. But the whole incest/self-cest trope also plays into the social horror thing cause that happens quite often in horror stories.
Cause usually when characters end up in a consensual incestous relationship it's because they've bonded over shared trauma and are kept so isolated both socially and psychically.....That I guess it starts to feel like it's impossible for someone other than this sibling or whoever to love and understand them.
It's not meant to be sexy or funny. It's meant to be tragic. And like you think you might be some desensitizing yourself I highly recommend--
Vampire Knight by Matsuri Hino
Flowers In The Attic by V.C. Andrews
Bates Motel tv series
Vampire Knight also exists as an anime, but I don't think the complete series was ever put to film. So if you wanna know how it ends then you need to read the manga. Flowers In The Attic is also a movie and you definitely want the 1987 version if you decide to watch it. Here's the trailer--
youtube
The movie is (or was) available to stream for free on Tubi.
And Bates Motel is a TV series that depicts a prequel to Robert Bloch's classic horror novel Psycho. The novel was adapted as a movie by Alfred Hitchcock whose well-known for putting horror movies on the map with his film, The Birds. Bates Motel stars Freddie Highmore and my favorite scream queen, Vera Farmiga who you may know from the Conjuringverse movies that depict the work of famed paranormal investigators (and con-artists) Ed and Lorraine Warren. Here's the trailer for that, too--
youtube
If you guys think some of these are too much for you to handle or that they're too triggering, I recommend looking up reaction videos and embracing schadenfreude because I can promise you if the person watching is a first time viewer.......Well, the first time I watched Bates Motel I was pretty much making this face the entire time--
So yeah.
#comic books#marvel#marvel comics#mcu#marvel cinematic universe#graphic novels#marvel movies#books#comic book movies#loki series#loki show#loki season two#marvel loki#thor movies#horror genre#horror novels#horror movies#social horror#flowers in the attic#v.c. andrews#bates motel#robert bloch#vera farmiga#classic horror#horror series#nerd stuff#nerd thoughts#horror nerd#this has been a psa#schadenfreude
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thoughts on lunasae? u have them listed in your pairings, i was wondering if u could elaborate on them more specifically. i'm still
conflicted on the pair myself. sometimes, i think it'd be a cute and funny ship that id love to see more content for. other times, it
feels like it'd be wayy too draining to put anyone in a relationship with luna (probably just my own personal biases speaking though.
it's tiring to deal with people who are so… backhanded. but i feel sae would probably handle his personality better since he doesnt
really seem to take shit passively). i can see them as a couple… but like, one that's gonna break up in the future? or just a relationship where they just have the occasional hookup or sumn? idk, thats why im so interested on what u may have to say abt it. im also curious as to why u may like it over something like shidousae
An ask for my other shipping log in Blue Lock!!!!
As always, a ton of rambling, so it's behind the read more.
On Shidou / Sae: they're on the lower end of my ship interest ranking, simply because there’s nothing in their interactions that particularly compel me towards them (those superbly gay lines to each other aside), and there’s not much of Shidou’s character design that interest me. My initial impression of him was some sort of spoof on the gyaruo subculture, and it really hasn’t changed much, hypersexualisation included. If there’s more stuff between them, or more development of either of them in the future I might get more invested, but for now I think that Lunasae could have a far more interesting dynamic and narrative, even if the authors don’t take it to where I think they could.
I get why you say that Luna is possibly tiring to deal with in a relationship. The way he talked to Rin? Not everyone can accept that kind of sarcasm and way of talking. But there’s quite a bit more to his character, even in his very, very brief appearance in the manga. It could really just be me overthinking things as usual, but I don’t think so. There’s some subtlety both in his character design and depiction that suggests that he is a character that has been given a fair bit of thought by the authors, so I’m running off of that. This is gonna be a little all over the place, so bear with me.
As a very, very minor character, there’s not much screen time for Luna, but there’s a ton of stuff we can extrapolate from his very brief appearance.
His interactions with Rin in the vs World 5 miniarc is really fun from a writing perspective. On the surface and in a quick skim through, the impression that he gives off is that he’s sarcastic and rude, but his actions with Rin in the mini arc tell a different story. He first deescalated Rin’s provocations (to Rin’s benefit, might I add) and neatly keeps Dada, Pablo and Adam from Rin after that by turning Rin’s attention, and Rin’s ire, onto himself. And how does he do it? By talking about Sae, praising Sae, even, to Rin’s face and saying he’s looking forward to see how Rin does.
During the match he gives Rin valid criticism and points out his weaknesses, and towards the end after Isagi and co. have given up on winning the match, while Rin is still trying to win, he even goes so far as to say he’ll face Rin sincerely. After he scores the last goal, he immediately reassures them as well, reminding them that this is an evaluation, and that they were never expected to win. He even tells them (foreshadows?) to meet in an official match next time. All in all, I think Luna has a sharp tongue on the surface, but he’s also pretty subtly caring with a certain level of emotional maturity and astuteness at handling conflict. Also seems to be a bit offbeat, judging by how Loki had to point out that he was being rude for him to apparently notice it.
I’m gonna dive a little more into meta about character design, since there really is so little we have about him in the story right now.
I’m going to start off with his name: Leonardo Luna. Luna was the part that really jumped out at me first, because one of the most common uses of Sae’s given name, the Japanese kanji, is to describe nights and shine, e.g. 冴えた夜、冴え輝く, both of which well, can be easily linked to the moon, thus Luna. The moon shines brightest in a clear night, after all. :D
For Leonardo, the meaning is lion-heart, and there’s a ton of positive connotations with the name of course, mostly to do with bravery, but I also like the implied meaning of a lion at the head of its pride, caring for the cubs and its pride members etc.
Then Leonardo’s nickname: the Noble of Real Madrid. Probably something in there about how he’s probably noble-hearted, tying into his given name, but there could also be something about Leonardo being a Madrileño and perhaps a legacy player of sorts, with older family who had made names for themselves in the sport too.
I’ve said before that I like them as an asshole x asshole ship, though in all fairness that’s pretty much all of the Blue Lock characters and ships. Just thinking of the both of them being judgy assholes together is hilarious to me, along the veins of Sae outright insulting someone to their face and meaning it, then Luna at first seeming to come to the other person’s face, then delivers another backhand insult way worse than Sae’s without intending to be rude is a comedy bit for me.
From what little we’ve seen of Luna, he seems to be a little fond of teasing people. Maybe a bit fond of leading people around the nose, with the way he played against Rin that time. I think that Sae is okay with that. Sae doesn’t give Shidou a hard time for any of it in the U20 match, even going along with it, somewhat. The only time he got pissed was when Shidou leapt onto his back without permission after Shidou got his second goal. When Oliver outmaneuvered him, Sae too, went along with it and continued playing in the match.
I think they both appreciate the hard truth, and have a pretty level-headed view of things overall (arguably you can’t get far in competitive sports without being able to do that, but y’know). Leonardo certainly doesn’t hesitate to say that he believes a Spanish guy could win in sumo more easily than Japan could win the World Cup in football, and its the same poor opinion that Sae himself has about Japanese football. They’re both also pretty decent at guiding/giving advice to others – I’d even say that Leonardo and Sae had some parallels to each other when they were with Rin and Shidou in the World 5 miniarc + U20 arc respectively, talking about Rin and Shidou’s weaknesses and how they needed to get better.
They’re both also more subtle with how they care for people, and we can see it in how they treat Rin. I just talked about how Luna looked out for Rin in the World 5 miniarc, but Sae is similar too. I’ve talked about how Sae treated Rin badly, but he’s still mostly a good brother to Rin: he didn’t scold Rin when Rin interrupted his match when they were children, he played and pushed Rin to be better with him, before he went to Madrid he was worried about how Rin would do without him since it’s implied Rin has never played without him up till that point. He would have ditched the U20 match after seeing Rin score, even saying that he has ‘seen what he wanted to see’, which strongly implies he just wanted to see Rin doing well with the Blue Lock project. He also thinks very highly of Rin’s capabilities, and his word choice shows as much when he talks about Isagi to Rin at the end of the U20 match (RIP Rin for not understanding the subtlety and having better insight to Sae’s thoughts).
Luna mentioned Sae specifically to Rin. It could be simply a minor detail more to distract Rin than anything, but I’m inclined to think that Luna has watched, or maybe trained a bit with Sae before despite the age gap. It’s not unlikely, since Sae is one of the best young talents around within Real’s Youth system. Clubs try to train up their own people irl and move them up if they have potential. There’s probably some level of regard he has for Sae there. On a more speculative note: I wonder if the authors are implying that Luna took the part-time job with Blue Lock because he was interested in Sae’s interest. Sae cancelled his return flight to Spain just to observe the Blue Lock project. It would have made some buzz in Real, especially if Sae is a core figure of Real’s youth team and that well-regarded, which I believe he is.
Also, Luna’s a world-class player, I can’t imagine Sae considering his butt as unattractive lmao.
Beyond that, I think Luna could be a fantastic foil to Sae, if the authors take it that way. Given the name etymology I discussed above, it would be amazing to have their stories paralleling each others: Leonardo, as a true blue Madrileño, growing up and achieving international success in his hometown and home team, vs the struggles that Sae had to go through while living out the basic immigrant story: of searching for greener pastures overseas to fulfill his dream, the hardships from living in a very different culture etc. Potentially quite a bit of drama, such as microaggressions, racism + bullying, the need to work twice as hard to prove himself to get at the same starting point others already are, the child exploitation that exists behind the whole sports youth system; basically a side commentary of a ton of social issues, which, again, I kind of doubt they’ll dive deeply into. It’s a bit too heavy, I think, for your average shonen sports manga, but who knows.
Then there’s the whole bit of the career paths both have chosen and are succeeding in: Luna as a world-class forward, and Sae as a genius midfielder part of the current generation's world-level players. There’s a fair amount of conflict and, well, story that could be in there too. We have nothing yet about the full reasoning behind Sae’s decision to change his dream, so *shrug* imagination, here I come.
Also I wonder why all the forwards Sae's been shown to play with, besides Rin, are blonde. Hmm?? Hinting at something, Kaneshiro-sensei??? Does Sae have A Type beyond the butts???
On the shippier side, I do believe they can have a pretty easygoing dynamic going on between them. A lot of easy banter, not quite like Shidou and Sae's conversations in the U20, but similar. They both definitely like the high life too, and I wouldn't put it past them to be the type who'd have super expensive dates and have them on a whim too, like, idk, a spur-of-the-moment trip to Paris or something.
And there's the typical drama involved with an age-gap relationship, plus the side dishes of navigating an interracial relationship, and a queer one, in a pretty homophobic environment overall. Especially when you remember that Sae himself is a perfectionist. It's an excellent bedrock for all sorts of character and ship dynamic explorations. All fun stuff to explore and think about.
TLDR; I like their individual aesthetics. I like what we’ve seen of their individual personalities. I like the potential they could have, both their commonalities and their differences. There’s a lot of story that could be there between them, and I have a ton of fun imagining dumb shippy and not-so-shippy stuff between them. So that’s why I ship Lunasae.
#niki answers asks#lunasae#tqvm for this ask i've been dying to talk about their narrative potential in-series#shippy or not they can be INTERESTING#and that's enough for me
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THUNDER AND FURY (THOR ODINSON X BLACK! OC)
Summary: Nicki Fury a tough girl who had no time for games is put on a team of formidable superheros falling in love with her polar opposite Thor odinson
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It's a man with long black hair, a smile sprawled across his face in a mischievous manner, he raised his head. The smile dying down. He looked deep into the eyes of Fury, Nicki, Barton and Selvig. Standing up, he held a scepter.
"Sir, please put down the spear!" Fury commanded.
He looked down at his spear as if reminded of his power, suddenly pointing it at where Fury, Nicki, and Barton were standing and shoots out and exploding blue light toward them. Barton tackles Fury and Nicki and barely missing the blast.
Machine gun fire is shot at the man, but the bullets ricochet off him like rubber. He jumps high from the platform and attacks the guards firing at him.
In the blink of an eye, the intruder takes down several guards with his knives and energy blasts from the scepter.
He stops and waits to see who will attack him next. Honestly, the whole lab has almost gone to shit. Barton tries to stand up but the male quickly walked towards him. As Barton raised his gun the stranger grabbed Barton's hand.
"You have heart." He mutters pointing the head of his spear at Barton's chest. Barton's eyes suddenly glow black then fade blue just like the Tesseract.
The ability to control Barton's mind was now in his hands. Barton puts his ear piece away standing up straighter.
The man seemed busy using his abilities to control the minds of several S.H.I.E.L.D. personnel, Nicki watched as Fury took the Tesseract, placing it back into its case and following him as he snuck out of the lab.
"Please don't. I still need that." The intruder said stopping the pair.
"This doesn't have to get any messier." Nicki warned raising her arms in defense.
"Of course it does. I've come too far for anything else." He paused regaining himself "I am Loki of Asgard, and I am burdened with glorious purpose."
Selvig gasped quietly "Loki? Brother of Thor?"
Nicki was perplexed why I the world would the gods come down just to pick a fight with them? they hadn't done anything, or had they Nicki thought eyeing her father suspiciously.
"We have no quarrel with your people." Fury said confused.
Loki smirked maliciously, "An ant has no quarrel with a boot."
"You planning to step on us?" Fury questioned pretending to sound offended.
"I come with glad tidings, of a world made free."
"Free from what?" Nicki scoffed, another villain with a hero complex.
"Freedom. Freedom is life's great lie. Once you accept that, in your heart..." Like a gunslinger, Loki turns to face Selvig who'stood behind him and placed the spear against Selvig's heart. Selvig's eyes begin glow black also fading blue. "You will know peace."
"Yeah, you say peace, I kind of think you mean the other thing."
From the vacuum chamber ceiling, the Tesseract energy cloud rapidly builds into what Nicki could assume may be an implosion.
"Sir, Director Fury is stalling. This place is about to blow. Drop a hundred feet of rock on us." Looking to the two Barton continued "they mean to bury us."
"Like The Pharaohs of Odin." Nicki smirked crossing her arms.
Selvig typed something into the computer "He's right. The portal is collapsing in on itself. You got maybe two minutes before this goes critical."
"Well, then..." Loki raises his eyebrow looking to Barton almost as a signal Hawkeye , Shoots Fury who falls to the ground.
Nicki's hands began to shake as they did every weapon in the hands of the evil SHEILD agents flew out of their reach leaving Barton and the rest unarmedm
Nicki let out a loud hiss as she felt a sharp pain pierce though her abdomen looking down she saw it was a blade that loki had previously used.
Suddenly she was sent flying back by a force so strong that made her clutch her head in immediate pain.
She groaned as she watched Barton grab the case containing the Tesseract leaving the lab with Loki, Selvig and the others.
Forcing herself up she crawled to her walkie talkie "Hill, do you copy?" Nicki asked pulling the blade from her stomach.
Maria stood outside she'd had heard Nicki but she was praying the god hadn't. "Barton is..." Maria got no time to hear the rest before Barton began shooting at her.
Clint hopped in the driver's seat of the Jeep still shooting at the agent as he drove away.
"Dad? Dad?" Nicki called for her father who didn't answer he was to busy pulling the bullet from his pierced skin.
Snatching the walkie talkie out of Nicki's hands he spoke "He's got the Tesseract! Track it down!"
As the Tesseract's storm was still brewing in the vacuum chamber Nicki threw her father's arm around her neck before running as fast as she could out of the building.
The pair made it safely through the building dodging a couple falling beams. Nicki could feel the ground shake underneath her feet.
"Get in the passenger I'll fly" Nicki told her father as she jumped in the aircraft. She watched as her father scrambled "looking for something?"
Pressing a button on the control panel the back of the jet converted into a weapon wall complete with grenades and all.
"All I need is one" Fury smirked confidently taking one of the guns down.
The surface of the landing pad began to give way right after Nicki had gotten the aircraft off the ground and up into the sky she watched in the rearview mirror as the place they had work so hard for fall as if it were nothing.
Fury slid open the chopper's door as he began shooting at the Jeep carrying the evil god and the tesseract.
Loki looked up at Fury and in a fit of rage, pointed his scepter which shot out a blue light. The chopper soon caught on fire.
Nicki tried to stable the plane her hands shaking against steering wheel she tilted the plan to the side giving them enough time to jump safely before the aircraft touched ground.
Nicki brushed her hair out of her face before standing next to her father who was shooting at the Jeep but they were too far and too late. Loki looked back a victorious smiling on his face.
"Director? Director Fury, do you copy?" Agent Phil Coulson said through the walkie talkie.
Fury paused before answering "the Tesseract is with the hostile force. I have men down. Hill?"
"A lot of men still under, don't know how many survivors" she said almost as if straining.
Nicki stood there watching the spot the Jeep had just been at, she wasn't mad she was angry. Snatching the walkie talkie out of her father's hand she spoke "Coulson, get back to base. This is a level seven as of right now, we are at war."
"What do we do?" He asked softly.
Nicki didn't know she looked up to her father who started off in the distance.
But she could tell behind that eye patch was the plan of a lifetime.
THE AVENGERS
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Can you write something where the reader is an avenger who has adhd? ❤️
Thank you so much for the request and I hope you'll like it!
Please, be aware of the fact that I do not suffer from ADHD, so if I wrote something offensive or incorrect, please let me know. I do not mean to be inappropriate and I'm aware of how serious ADHD can be, so I apologize in advance if I wrote something stupid.
Pairing: Avengers X neutral!reader
Warning: angst, mention of ADHD
GIFs belong to their creators.
YOU BEING AN AVENGER WITH ADHD WOULD INCLUDE:
Avengers being well aware but never making you feel inappropriate about it;
They all respect you deeply and also take care of you when you need their help;
Tony scolding everyone when they distract or lose attention during meetings, except you, because he understands that is sometimes hard for you to stay focused;
He being so proud when you ask him to repeat because he knows that, at the beginning, you were too embarrassed to ask;
Everyone being extremely protective of you;
But especially Steve and Natasha;
They always make sure to keep an eye on you during the battles;
They fight next to you all the time;
Even if they are perfectly aware of how strong and skilled you actually are;
They also get quite mad when someone hurts you;
You sometimes become hyperactive and when it happens, everyone just let you be;
You are sometimes afraid of being annoying but the Avengers always make sure to remind you that you're not;
Thor actually likes when you are like this because it's a good occasion for you to train with him;
He teaches you plenty of things anytime;
He always lets you try if you can lift the hammer;
He chuckles when you get determined and patiently hypes you up;
"One day, you're going to lift it and steal my powers. I know that."
Sometimes, you just feel like doing something fun and not related to missions and fights;
That's when Peter comes in;
He loves spending time with you;
You and him are the youngest of the group so you have so much in common;
You hang around together, with mutual friends;
He is so protective of you;
You too are so close, you know you can always count on him;
You usually sneak in Tony's laboratory to try his suits on;
Sometimes you get caught, but when you don't you spend hours fighting against each other in Ironman suits;
"Mr. Stark will kill us."
"Relax, Pete, he won't even notice."
He loves seeing you happy so he ends up listening to you;
Some days are so good;
But some others, not that much;
When anxiety comes you feel overwhelmed by it;
You mostly tend to isolate yourself: that's when you need Loki the most;
No one understands you like him when it comes about pain;
He knows when you need him, he doesn't even need to ask you;
He reassures you and makes sure not to leave untill you feel okay;
"Pet, I'm not going anywhere right now."
He softly tells stories to you while you try to focus on his tales, so that you can distract from your anxiety;
He reminds you that everything is okay and you are safe, and nothing bad is going to happen;
He hates seeing you like that, so he prefers staying next to you and help you face your anxiety;
As soon as you feel better, you just need to do something to distract;
Usually, Wanda and Vision take care of you in these cases;
The adore you and love when you are happy;
So they organise a picnic all together;
They invite you to cinema;
Or they simply spend time with you;
They make sure that you feel loved and understood;
You always make fun of them when they end up being cheesy;
"Ew, stop kissing in front of me guys."
They can't help themselves but laugh;
They support you and make you feel loved;
But not everyone is like that;
When someone fools you around or give you an hard time for your ADHD, the Avengers simply explode with anger;
Especially Bucky and Sam;
They won't let anyone say a single word to you about the matter;
They are so protective of you;
They don't even waste a moment, no one talks shit about you;
"So, you have ADHD, does this mean you're crazy?"
"Bucky, have you heard this bastard?"
"I did, Sam, and I think he needs a les-"
"I'm not crazy, but you're definitely an asshole."
They are so proud of you for the way you stand up for yourself, but this doesn't stop them from being ready to throw hands;
In conclusion, they are your family and they love you exactly for whom you are;
You feel protected, understood, loved. You feel home.
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To Adore You
Relationship | The Avengers x plus size fem reader
Words | 1,742 words
Warnings | discussion of insecurities + body image, fluff and lots of it, minor language
Notes | To add on to my comfort fics with Tony and Loki, I wanted to provide headcannons of all the avengers and how they’d react to such insecurities. But tbh, it could work for anyone, plus size or not. We’re all a little broken. <3
Notes Pt 2 | Should I add anybody??
Notes Pt 3 | Did I mention how much I cried while writing this?
Steve
Steve lived through the 40s. He’s seen many women during his time, and yet you are still the most enchanting. You’re everything he’s ever wanted, everything he’s ever dreamed of. He’d die in war for you, although you’d resurrect and kill him if he did.
“You’re my best girl,” he say, watching you stare at yourself in the mirror and picking away at your “problems”.
He’d take you out in dates, to go dancing, to the movies, or somewhere else, just to get the opportunity to look and feel your best. He knows how much a nice dress and makeup makes you feel like your best self. But when you get home and peel back all of the layers, you’re left feeling empty and plain. Steve would spend all night worshipping your body, holding you close and kissing all of your insecurities. “You’re my world dove, and you’re perfect.”
Some days he’d catch you talking bad about your size, how you’re too big, too fat, too everything. Steve would just wrap his arms around you, serving as a reminder of how tiny you are in comparison to him. “Our bodies were made for each other, as though we were carved straight from stone and made to fit like puzzle pieces.”
When you aren’t looking, he’d pulling out his tiny notebook and draw you, hoping you could see yourself the way others see you; how he sees you. We are all our own biggest critics, but the outside world can’t see these tiny blemishes you cry about. They can’t see the way your hair supposedly doesn’t fall the way it should.
Natasha
Nat never got to love her body as it naturally existed(just like Bucky), forced to be a government experiment and become a pon in a larger game she knew little of how to play. She just went along with it, being dragged by a locked collar. There was no freedom for her.
That is why she despises watching you break down, tearing apart your natural body in your free existence. “Baby, you’re the greatest thing that’s ever happened to me, you know?” You mean everything to Nat, providing her with a comfort she craved many years for. She never thought she’d find someone to love, someone she could love the way she does you. Not even Steve is as special as you are.
“Angel,” she say, holding your face so there’s no room to look anywhere else but at her. “You know why I call you Angel? Because you saved me. You, yes you. With your body, the perfect one that gives you strength, wakes you up in the morning, the one that allows you to see me everyday, that one. She can’t bare to hear you talk shit about yourself, knowing how much she adores every part of you.
Nat might even threaten to fight you, knocking you out cold until you come to your senses. But sometimes, not even she can sway you. So she’d just listen. She’d hold you close to her, head against her chest so you can hear how much of an effect have on her. She’d whisper sweet nothings to you, and talk about every moment where looking at you had taken her breath away. Of course that’s every moment, she’d confess, but she’ll limit it to the first time you met and your first date at the least.
Bucky
For a long long time, Bucky had no control over his body. He knew what it was like to hate the skin you lived in, to wish every day that you were someone else. That’s why it tears him apart to see you cry about your body. It feels as though someone is setting fire to his lungs every time you talk badly about yourself.
“Doll, you’re the moon, you know that?”Every day the sun sets, encasing the planet in a seemingly eternal darkness. But then the moon comes, as bright as she is. She may look dull in comparison to the sun, but her light is just as critical. She is different, but no less important. She casts a ray on sparkling waters, her reflection bending in the turn of each wave. She changes, she grows, and yet the people rely on her and love her through every stage. She is the light amidst their darkness, same as you are for him.
“You’re my best girl,” he’d remind you. His only girl. He’d go through cyrofreeze again for you. He’d do anything and everything just to keep you smiling. He adores your smile, reminding him of the Wakanda sun in summer. He’d seen a thousand sunsets, yet there’s nothing like that one in particular.
When you’re upset, Bucky would hold you real close, steel blues staring deeply into your own. “Plum, you are everything to me. Okay? There’s not a bone in your body, a strand on your head, a mark in your skin that I don’t love. And If you hate it, I’ll adore it for you in the meantime. Got it?” You’d nod of course, and he’d kiss each of your tears away. He’d proceed to wipe his own tears because when you’re sad, he is too.
Peter
Peter is probably the most awkward human being on the planet, so feelings are definitely a sore spot for him. He’s always afraid of saying the wrong thing. His love language are acts of service and gift giving; what he can’t say, he can show.
Whenever you’re feeling less than perfect, which is what you are, Peter would make crowns out of your favorite flowers and put them in your hair. He talk to you about flowers and the golden ratio, the manifestation of perfect in nature. It exists without any influence or manipulation. They’re perfect, untouched and allowed to be bent but never broken. No matter what they look like, what color they are, whether the stem is long or short, they’re perfect. And he’d remind you ever day, if need be, how naturally occurring perfection is in all of its forms, the same as the two of you.
He’d created like sculptures and figurines made from his webs or Tony’s plethora of gadgets. He’d stay up all night, despite Aunt May’s tumultuous warnings to go to sleep, just so he could make your day. It’s the little things, just to see you smile.
He’d carry you when you’re feeling down, reminding you that you don’t have to be “dainty” to be carried bridal style like the queen you are. He’s not gonna drop you, don’t worry.
Sam
Sam is your personal hype man, always and forever your biggest cheerleader. That’s why he’d be upset to see you talk down on yourself.
“Have you seen you?,” he looks at you incredulously. He kiss his teeth, grabbing your hand and dragging you to the mirror. He’d go over each part of your body, kissing each and every so called “imperfection.” Your body is a temple, he’d remind you. It carries you to a from work, it helps you breath, it helps you dance as good as you do, it sings the most enchanting melodies, etc. So how and why could you not love it? And while you’re in the journey to adoring every party of you, he’ll take on the job until you see yourself the way he sees you.
Sam might even take you shopping, because a good outfit always lifts the spirits. He’s scream and cry like a fan girl every time you leave the dressing room, bragging to the other customers about how stunning you are. “Look at my baby guys! That’s my baby!” He’d embarrass you wholeheartedly, but you’d never forget who’s cheering you on from the sidelines in the last quarter.
Thor
Thor is a god, so he’s always around beautiful people. Despite the many beings he’s encountered, he’d argue without hesitation that you are “the most beautiful creature in all of the galaxies, my love.”
Thor would provide countless examples of gods and goddesses with all their imperfections, who were regarded as royalty. Their imperfections were perfect in others’ eyes, the same as you. He’d talk about Freyja, the goddess of love and the most gorgeous of them all. She too, was plus size.
He’d worship the ground you walk upon, talking until his throat is dry about how no mortal, alien, wizard, or other could hold a candle to your beauty. And not only are you beautiful to look at, your soul is kind. Who you are beneath your skin is the woman he fell in love with, the person he would cross galaxies for and experience Ragnarok 10x over to see again.
He’d probably call you an idiot, yelling about your “audacity to insult the woman I love!” He’d be heartbroken honestly, seeing how torn up you are and hating everything he couldn’t get enough of. He’d come up with the dumbest ideas to cheer you up, many of them involving making a complete and utter fool of himself. But he knows a hearty laugh does the soul good.
Bruce
Bruce is…difficult. He’a such an intelligent man, but so profoundly stupid. He likely wouldn’t even realize at first what you’re upset for. But once he does, he’d drop everything for you, nearly burning his arm off in his lab by spilling a strange chemical on his way over.
As hulk, Bruce had never felt more unlike himself. He spent years battling his own body, hiding away what he thought were the ugliest parts of himself. Even though hulk is cool, strong, and important, Bruce couldn’t live existing that way. And he practically broke apart in trying to accept that element of his life.
He knows your insecurities aren’t just going to magically go away because he doesn’t see them, the same as everyone else. But, he’s willing to hold your hand and guide you in a direction to see yourself through his eyes. He probably could if we’re honest, with the right tech and formulas.
But for now, he’ll settle on talking to you. He’ll sit quietly, rubbing your back and kissing your face while you talk about everything that’s “wrong” with you. Then, he’ll tell you everything he loves about you. From your smile, to the way your nose crinkles when you shiver, to the way your lip pouts when you’re upset(which he finds hilarious and cute), he loves all of it. Every single part of you, even the green and “ugly.”
#steve rogers#natasha romanov#bucky barnes#peter parker#sam wilson#thor odinson#bruce banner#Steve x plus size reader#bucky x plus size reader#Natasha x plus size reader#steve rogers x reader#natasha romanov x reader#bruce banner x reader#thor x reader#hulk x reader#captain america x reader#marvel headcanons#marvel fluff#bucky barnes x reader
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Hey man, good to know you're back to the game, I'm proud of your mental progress and everything else. Could you do a headcanon about the avengers with a boyfriend that is REALLY sarcastic towards authorities, makes dark remarks all the times or when people hit on their BFs like: oh I am a prince! I'll treat you like monarchy! And he answers like: oh, like, Ann Boleyn or Marie Antoinette? He dresses up into the alternative/gothic side but deep down is very caring and shit, also LOVES literature and history.
AYEE WADDUP SETH??? AND TYSM FOR CHECKING UP ON ME I'VE BEEN DOING BETTER💕💕- and bruh I'm actually alternative and goth in real life LOL.
Also sorry if I missed anything this was alot-
{Requested}
Avengers x Male!Reader
Marvel Preferences: Sarcastic Boyfriend
(Lmao Steve IS the authority) Steve has to deal with your snarky remarks everytime he tells you to so something or when he's scolding you on your safety. Everyone's surprised on how much patience he has with you, and how he makes excuses for you but not without scolding you later on.
He's not very amused when you would flirt back with anyone who's hitting on you, giving you that serious that 'Captain' look.
He grows a little worried about your dark sense of humor, and he doesn't really find any of it funny...
At first, Steve doesn't understand the whole alternative or goth fashion thing, but he grows more open to it when you would explain more to him. He still has trouble understanding it, but he does love how you can be carefree about your fashion style.
Bucky is a little worried when you would talk back to authorities, and tries to tell you not to overdo it because he doesn't want you to have to deal with any punishments. But if you're defending him, he feels more flattered and vulnerable.
He chuckles a little at your dark humor, only for the team to sit in shock when he does.
But he's not very amused when you would make such comments when people are flirting with you. Out of jealousy, he grabs your hand and drags you away, only to be grumpy when you would joke about it (you gotta make it up to him with hugs and kisses later).
He really likes your style and he admires how you can just be yourself (rip anyone who makes any mean comments about it).
You are Tony's ideal match and worst nightmare (Rhodey just says this is everyone's worst nightmare though). You two always give authories (Steve cough) a difficult time, and they have to deal with the both of you. But that comes back to you later since the both if you are sarcastic and snarky, you would end up having a comeback match with each other, which would last all day.
He gets your sense of humor which can match with how sarcastic he is (on how he uses humor at the wrong times).
When you would make a bunch those comments, Tony agrees with you and then playfully says he's much more of a prince than you are, just to make you a little jealous on purpose.
Yes, Tony says you look like you came out of a rock band (I get this alot) and comes up with a bunch of nicknames for you based off of your appearance.
Sam thinks it's usually funny and entertaining when you would talk back to authorities (Steve) sometimes, but if it's more of a serious situation, he warns you to take it more seriously.
He teases you about where you got your sense of humor, and always expects you to have some dark joke in a casual conversation (even at the wrong times). Sam doesn't really mind it, and would laugh at how shocked people are that he's not bothered by it.
Sam admires your fashion style and jokes about you getting into any trouble, only to laugh when you would come up with a snarky comeback.
Scott...is either shocked or confused everytime you talk back to the authorities. But then, he thinks it's cool and tries to copy you, only to get yelled at or look pretty stupid later on.
He has a blank stare whenever you would make dark jokes or remarks, only to say something like, "uh...what just happened and where did that come from?" As a whole, he doesn't really understand dark humor.
When you flirt back with people, he jumps in and gets defensive, trying to shoo away the person who was hitting on you, not caring if he looks ridiculous or not.
Scott thinks your fashion style is so cool, and wants to dress like you, only to probably backfire when Cassie says she wants to dress like you as he would get all defensive about it.
Peter gets worried when you would talk back to authorities, and gives you a small warning such as a light bump on your back or shoulder to get you to stop. He's trying to get used to your dark humor, but he's glad that you're able to get along with MJ so well due to your humor and fashion style.
When people flirt with you, he can't tell if you're being sarcastic or not when you would say such comments. He starts getting all pouty and gives you puppy eyes, to get more of your attention.
At first, Bruce would be really silent and feel awkward about you being rebellious. Now, he does tell you to back down, to everyone's surprise.
Your humor on the other hand? To everyone's shock, he actually laughs at a few if your dark jokes (only if he can relate to them).
He's not really bothered by your fashion style. He actually finds it ironic how sweet you can be sometimes.
Thor is not very fond of how rebellious you can be - this actually worries him, especially since it reminds him of how he used to be, and he doesn't want anything to happen to you, and he tries to get through to you.
He actually finds himself laughing at your dark humor, which surprises everyone (well, he does hang around Loki).
He finds how you dress is unique and praises you on how beautiful you are. Thor does wish people shouldn't judge you for how you dress and how suspicious they are of you, only to want to show them just how loving and caring you really are.
You're an ideal match for Loki. He just finds it's entertaining when you would always talk back to the authorities, and sits back and watches. When it comes to your dark humor, he completely understands and finds it hilarious.
But if you flirt back with people? Loki gets jealous easily so he went hestitate to steal you away and remind you who you belong to while having his way with you.
You have lots of common with Loki when it comes to your fashion style, and does think it's fasinicating how someone can have so much in common with him. He also surprises you with accessories to match with your outfits.
You and Pietro can also be everyone's worst nightmare. He can be really stubborn especially when it comes to any authorities, and what makes it more of a handful is when you would tag along with him.
He understands a little of your dark humor and finds some of your jokes funny, but it goes to an extent. Some jokes may end up triggering him ('cause of HYDRA) and he takes that very seriously.
Pietro gets jealous easily, so flirting with the person who's hitting on you will cause him to drag you away, making you have to deal with him being all grumpy.
He doesn't really care about your fashion style since he's more fixated on your personailty than anything else.
#Requested#Marvel Preferences#Avengers Preferences#Steve x male reader#Bucky x male reader#Tony x male reader#Tony Stark x male reader#Sam Wilson x male reader#Sam x male reader#Scott x male reader#Scott Lang x male reader#Peter x male reader#Peter Parker x male reader#Bruce x male reader#Bruce Banner x male reader#Thor x male reader#Loki x male reader#Pietro x male reader#Pietro Maximoff x male reader
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The Nanny - Tom Hiddleston x Curvy Reader
“Papa!” India ran towards her father, Chris Hemsworth.
Hemsworth picked her up, looking around for whoever had the other two. When he spotted you, he waved and laughed seeing both boys clung to you. You had one on each hip. A big perk of being curvy is that it makes it a lot easier to tote the little ones around.
It was rare that him and his wife, Elsa, both had projects going on at the same time, but when it did happen, they had a close friend nanny the children near one of the projects. With the twins being a year old and able to be away from their mother for a short time, Elsa reluctantly took a month-long job where she would be doing quite a lot of traveling. Chris put her worries at ease and told her she had put her own career on hold quite a lot for their family. You had met the couple back when you nannied for their manager. When they had India, you helped them navigate having a child while working in Hollywood. When the twins arrived, you once again moved in with the family and helped smooth the hectic schedule involved in being a parent to three kiddos while working in such a high-demand and publicized job.
“India, I told you to wait for me” you gently scolded the young girl.
“…but I saw papa n unca Tom” she replied, hiding her face in her father’s neck.
“India, you know you need to listen to Y/n. She just wants you to be safe” Hemsworth said, rubbing her back with his hand.
“…m sorry” she said, peeking her face out and smiling at you.
“Thank you” you replied.
“You look like you’ve got your hands full” Tom said, a soft smile on his face as he looked at the two boys sitting on your hips. “I think we’re done for the day” he added, gaining the attention of Tristan, one of the twin boys.
Tristan reached out a hand, making grabby gestures towards Tom. “Looks like you’re about to have your hands full” you quipped, safely passing the 1 year old to Tom who happily took him into his arms.
“Hey, buddy” Tom said, smiling as the young boy gently played with the wig he was wearing. Tom was great with everyone’s kids. It kind of made you wonder why he hadn’t had any of his own.
Hemsworth spoke to India, bouncing her up and down. “Papa and uncle Tom need to go get out of our costumes and then we can all go home and eat. Does that sound okay?” Chris was talking to India, but he looked at you and Tom as well just wanting to confirm that this plan worked for everyone and making sure Tom knew he was welcome to join.
“Sounds wonderful” Tom replied.
“India, why don’t we go get dinner started for everybody. I could use some help.” You knew that India LOVED to help cook.
“Your papa takes a lot longer than me to get ready…” Tom teased, making Hemsworth laugh. “So why don’t you let me walk you back to the car with Y/n so he can get a head start?”
India started squirming, wanting her dad to put her down. “Make sure you hold uncle Tom’s hand the whole way.”
When you got back to the car, you put Sasha in the first child safety seat and turned to grab Tristan from Tom. “Thank you for walking them back with me”, you smiled up at your always generous friend.
“No need to thank me” he said, passing off the second boy. “You’re incredible with them, but I know it has to be a lot of work.”
Strapping Tristan into the second child safety seat, you replied. “You’re a natural with kids, Tom. You’re going to make a wonderful dad someday.”
Slightly blushing, he replied. “Well, I’ll take that as the highest compliment coming from you.”
Tom’s sincerity kind of stopped you in your tracks for a second. “I’ll take that as a compliment as well”, you failed at hiding the grin he’d put on your face. “India, say bye bye to uncle Tom. He needs to go get ready so him and papa can come home.”
The girl gave Tom a hug before reaching for you. “I’ll see you guys soon” Tom said, waiting to leave until you got the third child strapped in so he could open your door for you.
“Always a gentleman” you smiled at Tom who was still in full Loki garb.
As you climbed into the car, Tom said “A woman such as yourself deserves to be served by the gods.”
You felt your cheeks warm as you thanked him again. “Remind Chris that he promised he’d bring home ice cream for India.”
When you got to the house where you, the kids, and Chris were staying during filming you pulled into the garage and unloaded the kids. The two boys were in their safe gated area in the living room so they could play, and India was sat on the counter helping you tear apart lettuce for the salad.
“Good job, sweetie.” You said, finishing up the grilled chicken and squash. “Can you go wash your hands for dinner while I get the boys set up in their high-chairs?” you asked, setting India on the ground. “Make sure you use the bathroom downstairs. No stairs without an adult!” you called out. You continued making the salad at the counter
“Dinner smells wonderful” you heard, feeling a hand on your shoulder. You were startled, not knowing the guys had arrived home.
“Shit!” you yipped, turning and almost dropping the bowl in your hands.
Tom grabbed the bowl, trying to hold back laughter. “I’m so sorry” he laughed out, setting the bowl on the counter and wrapping his arms around you.
“You made me say a bad word” you replied, laughing into Tom’s chest. You wrapped your arms around him and leaned back against the counter for stability. Looking up at him you added, “No swearing in front of the children”.
“Well, I’m not the one that said it, darling” a smirk present on his otherwise serious face.
“You’re supposed to leave the mischief at work” you laughed, dropping your arms from around him and turning to finish the salad.
“What fun would that be?” he said quietly into your ear as he reached around you and snagged a vegetable out of the salad.
When you turned around, he was stepping over the child gate to grab one of the twins and get them set up at the table. You shook your head as if you could shake away the very inappropriate thoughts you were having about your friend.
You could hear Hemsworth laughing in the other room, India giggling along with him. “Well, are you going to tell me the secret?” he said. “No one else can know?” he questioned. India must have been trying to tell him something. “Well, they can’t hear you, just whisper it to me.” It got quiet for a moment. “Ah, I see. I’ll have to pay attention and see for myself.”
“Are you telling secrets?” Tom asked after grabbing the second twin and setting them up at the table.
“Mmhmm” you heard her say as you brought the platters full of food to the table.
“Do I get to know?” you asked, turning to grab the twin’s bowls since they weren’t eating adult food yet.
“Maybe” she answered before telling her dad she could get in her own chair. She was quite proud that she wasn’t in a high-chair anymore and she wanted to seat herself.
“Do you need help with anything else, darling?” Tom asked, following you back into the kitchen.
“Help me grab the cups of water?” you answered, handing him two full cups before grabbing your own and a small juice cup for India.
“Dinner was delicious” Hemsworth said, leaning back in his chair with his hands over his stomach.
“It truly was” Tom added, standing to gather the dishes.
“I’m glad” you replied, gathering the dishes Tom hadn’t grabbed. “You don’t have to clear the table.” You said, reaching for the last dish.
“Nonsense” he replied, grabbing your hand before you could grab the last dish. “You worked hard preparing this wonderful meal. The least I can do is help clean up.”
He wouldn’t let go of your hand until you conceded. “If you must” you said with a smile. “Thank you.”
You saw India crawl into her dad’s lap and whisper something to him. “I see” he answered, looking between you and Tom.
You shot him a look, letting him know you were suspicious of whatever they were talking about. Hemsworth shrugged, acting innocent.
After dishes were done and leftovers were put away, Chris put the twins to bed. You could hear him singing along with the giggles of the twin boys. “India, do you want to take a bath before bed or in the morning?”
“Tomorrow” she answered, crawling up the stairs to her room with you right on her heels.
“Tom, there’s a bottle of red wine already out on the counter if you want to grab a few glasses. I’ll be back down in a few.” You called down the stairs.
When you finished getting India dressed in her jammies and got a movie playing in her room, you headed back down the stairs. You could hear the guys talking in living room, but you couldn’t really make out what they were talking about. “You make it sound a lot easier than it is” you heard Tom say before you made it to the bottom of the stairs.
“All good?” Hemsworth asked, getting up to go say goodnight to his daughter.
“As per usual, she’s a dream. She’s watching Big Hero 6.” You answered, walking into the living room.
“Come sit” Tom said, holding out a glass of wine for you.
You grabbed the glass and sat in the spot next to Tom. “Thank you for pouring the wine” you said, taking a sip and sighing, laying back against the soft couch.
“Long day?” Tom asked.
“Not nearly as long as yours. I can’t imagine going non-stop all day like you guys do.” You answered, turning your head to face Tom as you took another sip of wine.
“Ridiculous” he said, tapping his glass against yours. “You take care of three tiny human beings that have all of the energy and attitude of their father”, he laughed. “I’d argue that your job is harder.”
“They’re great kids. The only reason this week has been a bit tiring is because the twins are teething. Sasha seems to be getting it worse, though” you explained.
“Poor thing” Tom said.
“I know. He’s been clung to my side all week. I’m surprised Chris got him to sleep, actually. He’s been fussy at bedtime and usually ends up passing out in my arms.” You felt Tom’s arm slip from the back of the couch to your shoulders.
“Well, enjoy the break” he said, pulling you to lean into his side a bit. “Though I can’t blame him for wanting to sleep in your arms.”
You looked up at Tom. “You’ve been awfully complimentary today.”
“I’m just saying, you’ve got a wonderfully voluptuous figure, darling.” He cleared his throat. “I imagine anyone that gets to fall asleep in your embrace is going to sleep well.”
“Well, if I thought you were interested, I might just tell you to find out for yourself.” You could hear Hemsworth coming down the stairs.
“Tom, I got the spare room all set up for you so we can ride into work tomorrow. No point in going to your place since we both have to be in the make-up trailer at 7 tomorrow anyways.” Chris said, laying out on the couch across from the two of you after grabbing his wine glass. “Y/n, I checked Sasha. He’s still asleep.”
“I’m glad. Hopefully his teeth aren’t hurting him as much.” You answered.
Chris looked at how you and Tom were sat and made eye contact with Tom, raising his eyebrows and looking between the two of you. “Anything you two want to tell me?” He asked, grinning like a little kid.
“Whatever do you mean?” Tom smirked, drinking the last of his wine. “Would you like more wine, Y/n?”
“Yes, actually. Thank you.” You sipped the last of your wine, handing the glass to Tom. When he got up, you watched him walk away with a smile on your face.
When he was out of earshot, Hemsworth imitated him. “Oh, whatever do you mean?” He laughed, looking at you and waiting for some sort of response.
“I have no idea what’s gotten into him” you shrugged, unable to keep the smile from your face.
“I’d wager a bet that I know what’s gotten into him.” He looked you up and down, sipping his wine, as if to say ‘duh!’ You’d become practically family to Chris and Elsa, and unbeknownst to you they’ve always thought you and Tom would make a great pair.
“Then why now?” you asked.
Chris shrugged. “India’s big secret earlier was that she thinks uncle Tom over there thinks you’re pretty because he looks at you like I look at her mom.”
Your face softened, thinking that was the cutest damn thing you’d ever heard. “Your daughter is officially my favorite of your children. You aren’t allowed to tell the boys. Or their mother.”
Chris laughed. “But seriously…give it a chance. Trust that I know something you don’t.” He was trying to help without breaking Tom’s confidence.
You could hear Tom walking back. You whispered, “I didn’t know I had a chance!”
“Here you go, darling.” Tom sat back down, opening his arms so you could resume your earlier position.
“Thank you” you answered, snuggling further into Tom.
The conversation went back to normal after Tom came back. The guys talked a bit about what they would be filming tomorrow, and they answered questions as you had them. Chris talked about the fact that Elsa would be coming to visit for a few days since Tom and him had two days off from filming after tomorrow.
“Y/n, Elsa will be here for 2 nights, 3 days and she wanted to make sure you knew that you didn’t need to work that whole time. You’re obviously more than welcome stay with us and keep your schedule, but she wanted you to know you could make plans.” Chris explained, knowing that you usually stayed and helped even when one of the parents was going to be around full time for a while.
“I don’t think I have any plans to make, but I’ll keep it in mind” you answered.
As the night wound down, you could feel yourself drifting off while cuddled up next to Tom. “I think I’m going to call it a night.”
“It is getting quite late” Tom responded, his hand running up and down your arm.
“Thank you two for a nice kid free night” you laughed, pulling yourself from Tom’s embrace to stand up.
Tom watched as you slightly adjusted your clothes, his eyes gazing over your body as you stretched. “The thanks should go to you, love.” He stood, grabbing the three wine glasses so that they could be rinsed in the kitchen.
“You have to stop giving me all the credit” you replied, grabbing the glasses from Tom. You leaned up and pressed a quick kiss to his cheek before taking the glasses to the kitchen.
When you were far enough away, Chris started teasing Tom. “Oh, whatever do you mean?” he repeated from earlier.
Tom threw a pillow at him, leaving the living room to find you in the kitchen. “I don’t want to startle you again” he spoke before he entered the kitchen, peeking around the corner with his hands raised.
“I didn’t even know you guys were home earlier” you laughed. Your hands were in a sink full of water, rinsing the wine glasses.
“I just wanted to come and say goodnight.” Tom walked up behind you, placing his hands gently on your hips and kissing your cheek from over your shoulder. “I hope you get some well-deserved rest.”
“You too” you answered, but he was already walking away when you turned to look at him.
When you got in your room, you felt like you were floating. Today felt crazy. Sure, you and Tom had been fast friends from the start. You’d certainly grown close, but today felt like something entirely different.
“Chris said to trust him.” You stripped out of your clothes and took the time to decompress in the shower. You towel dried your hair, threw on a pair of short spandex shorts and a baggy t shirt, and crawled into bed.
You were woken up by the baby monitor in your room. “Oh, Sasha.” You crawled out of bed and quietly made your way down the hallway. “Come here, sweetheart.” You picked Sasha up and he threw his arms around your neck. You walked back and forth, bouncing him in your arms.
“Is everything alright?” You heard Tom quietly ask from the doorway.
“I’m so sorry if he woke you” you said, feeling bad that they had a full day of shooting tomorrow.
“Don’t be” he replied, walking into the room and rubbing Sasha’s back comfortingly. “I take it his teething woke him up?”
“Must have.” You answered. “I’ll get him back to sleep if I take him to my room.” You turned to check on Tristan and he was standing up in his crib with tears running down his face.
“I’ll grab him” Tom said, moving to pick the boy up out of his crib and holding him to his chest. “What do you normally do when they both wake up?”
You couldn’t help but smile at how cute Tom was in his pajamas and glasses. “I’d take them back to my room with me. They usually fall asleep pretty quickly after that.”
“Would you like some company?” Tom asked, kind of in awe of how easily you handled the craziness of taking care of three very young children.
“I’d love some” you answered, turning and walking to your bedroom. Holding Sasha to your chest with one arm, you pulled back the blanket and crawled into your bed. You were sat up, just a bit, with the already half-asleep boy draped across your front with his head snuggled into your chest.
Tom followed suit with Tristan draped across his much leaner figure. “Come here” he said, lifting his arm so you could tuck the two of you against Tom’s side.
“I hope you aren’t too tired tomorrow” you said, feeling yourself already drifting off to sleep.
“Don’t worry about it, darling. Get some sleep.” Tom pressed a kiss to the top of your head before dozing off, himself.
You woke up to Hemsworth trying to wake Tom with the biggest grin on his face. “Brother, we need to leave in a half hour.”
Both boys were still passed out on top of the two of you. You rolled out of bed, still holding Sasha. “Let me go put Sasha in his crib and I’ll be back for Tristan.” You walked to the boy’s room and laid him down in his crib. Before you could even turn towards the door, Tom walked through with Tristan. “Good morning” you whispered.
Tom set the boy down in his crib and gestured that the two of you leave so you wouldn’t wake them back up. “Good morning, beautiful.” Tom gently closed the boy’s door and pulled you to him in a long, lazy hug.
“You’re not allowed to be charming this early in the morning.” You laughed against his chest.
“Nonsense” he said, letting his hands slowly slide to rest on your ass. “If I’m not allowed to be charming then you’re not allowed to be irresistible.”
“That road goes two ways” you said, sliding your hands under the back of his shirt and grinning up at him.
“Oh, does it?” Tom replied, dipping down to kiss your cheek before whispering “I think you should stay at mine while Elsa is here.”
“Tom!” Hemsworth whisper-yelled down the hall. “Get your hands off my nanny’s ass and get ready for work.”
You both tried to quiet your laughter as not to wake the boys back up.
“Consider it?” Tom said, releasing you and walking towards Chris to get changed and on their way.
You quickly walked to your room to brush your teeth and wash your face. You threw on a more modest pair of shorts and quickly put your bra on so you could go make the guys some coffee for the road.
Once in the kitchen, you brewed some coffee and got two travel mugs ready. You grabbed a piece of fruit and a protein bar for each of them before Tom walked in. “I hope you got enough rest”
“Actually, I feel incredible.” He said, eyeing the coffee and breakfast you’d set up for him and Chris. “I don’t think it has anything to do with rest, though, if I’m being entirely honest.”
“It must be something in the air” you blushed, ducking your head.
Tom took a step towards you. “At this point, I don’t think I could spend all day trying to pay attention to my lines and cues and such if I’m preoccupied with wondering whether or not I’ve made my feelings clear.”
You looked up at Tom, realizing this is the first time you’ve ever seen him look nervous. “Was your invitation serious?” you asked, filling the gap between you and sliding your arms around his neck.
“Very” he answered, holding you tight against him.
“Then, yes” you answered, going onto your tippy toes and pressing your lips together in a slow, gentle kiss.
“Brilliant” he breathed out, dipping back down to connect your lips once again.
--------------
Part 2? Let me know! (I haven’t edited this so I apologize if there are errors. I’m too sleepy.)
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