#sometimes the solution is becoming a frog and i love that | Explore Tumblr Posts and Blogs

caffeinated-cryptid · 4 years

Text

patton and the no-good day

5.9k words | AO3 link | warnings: angst, alcohol, swearing, arguing, lashing out, minor injury, crying, fire, repetition.

“Patton wants to know what it’s like to make the right choices, so he tries...And tries. And tries and tries andtriesandtries-

(aka: a time loop fic where patton manages to revisit the day of svs, this time with the goal of making everyone happy. he quickly discovers that he's bitten off more than he can chew.)”

________________________________

Patton was unhappy. And he was unhappy because everyone else was unhappy. After the wedding, he had become so intimately aware of every mistake he had made. From Logan’s quiet dismissal when he tried to talk to him, to Virgil’s obvious avoidance of everyone, to Roman’s complete shutdown.

The only sides he could assume weren’t mad at him at the moment were Janus and Remus. And Remus was only a maybe, just based on how excited he’d been to hear that he had turned into a giant muscular frog alone.

Patton could only grimace upon recalling his breakdown. It was supposed to be the turning point for him, an indication of ‘Hey, I've come to realize that I’m deeply flawed but now I’m able to start fixing things!’. But of course, it didn’t turn out like that. Every day that passed only grew harder and harder with his mistakes staring him in the face. He was tired of waking up, dreading the insurmountable process of trying to make things right and failing, only to fall asleep and try again the next day.

It was like he was trapped in a loop of identical days, each one as ineffective as the last.

Patton could barely imagine the end of this tunnel, until one morning, he woke up and for once everything felt... different.

He ignored the feeling at first as got ready as usual, heading out towards the kitchen with the expectation of seeing empty chairs at empty tables once more. Except when he walked in this time, preparing to make a breakfast no one would eat, everyone was there already seated. It was just like how everything was before-- Janus and Remus were absent, but Logan, Virgil, Roman...all of the sides he considered his best friends were there, all togeher in one place for the first time in weeks.

He burst into tears on the spot and they collectively startled, immediately questioning what was wrong. It took a few minutes to convince them all that he was fine, that he just got emotional seeing them all because he loved them so much (which wasn't even a lie!), and in the end they accepted his explanation because sometimes that was just what Patton was like. As he sat down and tried to act as normal as possible, he couldn't help but stare at all of them, so carefree as they chatted and poked fun at each other. There wasn't a single furrowed brow, or a hidden frown, or a look of hurt. It was unfortunately because of that that he knew his gut feeling was right; there was something strange going on here.

Throughout the morning, Patton couldn’t put his finger on what was so familiar about this day until he felt a certain series of events occur: Thomas gets a call. He picks up the phone and talks with the casting agent for a famous director. He’s told that he got the callback for his audition and he’s terribly excited, so excited that his sides come out to celebrate with him and-

Oh. Oh! That was his cue, wasn’t it? Patton bit back a frown, rising up to share their excitement and then to remind them about the wedding that was scheduled for the same day. It was hauntingly familiar, seeing the way Thomas and Roman became dejected and knowing that this was only the start of an uphill battle.

And then Fauxgan came in- or rather Janus, disguised as Logan- and when Patton saw his new snakey friend, his chest swelled with excitement. This was his opportunity to change things! He knew that in the current script, Janus would soon reveal himself and begin pushing back against what Patton had said. So when that happened this time, he could simply agree and make it seem like he had been convinced to change his mind. That way, they could reach a different solution and everyone would be happy. Simple!

Patton watched and waited patiently as the others made comments back and forth; Virgil and Janus snarking each other as Janus made his case to be listened to.

“That...can not be where the bar is!” Virgil protested in disbelief once Thomas agreed to hear him out, based on his vague 'the enemy of my enemy is a friend' ideal.

“Well, the bar for skipping an important opportunity should be higher than a...social engagement.” Janus replied distastefully.

This was where he originally jumped in to disagree. Patton saw Roman grow shifty out of the corner of his eye and knew: this was it!

“Maybe Janus is right! This is a huge opportunity. We should try to figure out a way to make both events if we can, but this means a lot for Thomas so we shouldn’t just skip it.“ Patton said confidently, even though the argument felt strange coming out of his mouth. At least he knew this time around he was making the right choice by backing down.

But the others only looked at him strangely, with varying degrees of confusion across their faces.

“Who’s Janice-”

“You’re agreeing with him?! I knew you were acting weird-”

“How do you know my name-”

Patton’s eyes widened, realizing his subconscious mistake. He had gotten so used to referring to Deceit as Janus over the weeks that they’d been friends that his name just automatically slipped out. It was too late to take it back; the conversation was quickly derailed, with too many accusations coming out at once to even try geting back into the dilemma. At one point Janus wondered aloud if Remus had somehow gotten out and taken the form of Patton, which only raised more questions and ended with a sword pointed at his throat.

It was a disaster. They make the last-minute decision to go to the wedding out of spite for Janus and Patton.

________________________________

The next morning, Patton woke up with a start, looking around his room to find that it was exactly the way he had left it the day prior. Normally this wouldn’t be such a cause for alarm, but today it was because Patton was certain he had thrown a few things last night in childish frustration at himself for messing things up. Only soft items, because he couldn’t bear to accidentally destroy anything in his sentiment-filled room, but the fact remained that seeing his pillows lined up at the end of his bed again was a strange sign, one that had him suspicious about how this day was going to go.

To test his theory, he went down to the kitchen without bothering to change out of his pajamas, only to see the other three sides already sitting there in the exact same places as yesterday. He paused in the doorway, waiting for them to show recognition of the day prior-- for some kind of hostility or accusation. The only thing he received were snickers.

“Nice PJs, Pat.” Virgil smirked over his bowl of cereal before going back to scrolling on his phone.

Patton’s mind slowly processed this. It was as if the day had reset, back to the world he had woken up to yesterday. He sunk down into the last remaining chair and forced himself to make a joke about ‘having a PB&J sandwich to match this PJ day’, despite Logan’s protests that he would not be sharing the last jar of crofters (He always said this to deter them from eating his jam, but it was always a lie and he'd always let them have some in the end. Patton didn’t realize how much he missed that habit of his until he almost started crying again over Logan passing him the jam jar).

After a perfectly normal breakfast, he quickly returned back to his room to change and prepare for what was ahead of him. Now that he knew the day was definitely repeating and could recognise where he went wrong yesterday, he just needed to ensure he didn’t make such a silly mistake right off the bat again.

He went through the motions: Thomas getting a phone call, him reminding them of the wedding, and then the beginnings of debate.

“I agree with Deceit.” He said this time, smiling as he remembered to not use Janus’ name.

Despite his conscious effort, it doesn’t go over much better. Janus was surprised and suspicious of Patton’s sudden change of heart and Virgil immediately got on the defense. Once again, the argument quickly escalated.

“Why would you side with him?! He’s one of the others! You can’t trust him!” Virgil cried, hands tugging on his hoodie strings as he desperately tried to convince them. It was currently three against one. He must have felt cornered, having no one on his side, Patton realized belatedly.

“And how are you so sure of that?” Patton still responded back, feeling offended on behalf of his friend. He had promised himself he wouldn’t make things worse this time, but seeing Virgil get so angry at him hit a sore spot. As long as he was right about his theory, this day was already ruined the moment he sided with Janus, anyway.

“Because I was one of them!” Virgil yelled, and his expression quickly changed from frustrated to devastated to frightened. And then he sunk out, giving no one the chance to stop him.

The remaining sides stood in silence before Janus broke into hysterical laughter. Patton could hear it echo in his mind as the day reset for the third time.

________________________________

The next time, he didn’t bring up the wedding at all.

Patton didn’t want to kid himself; he was scared from seeing Virgil sink out so suddenly. After having Virgil’s anger directed at him twice and seeing him leave upset once, he figured that meant that outright siding with Janus was a risky thing to do if he wanted to make sure everyone was happy by the end of this.

So instead of trying to change his stance, he simply removed the confusing aspect out of the equation altogether and made sure no one remembered it or brought it up. This way for sure, he thought, everything would go a lot smoother.

...He was wrong.

Weeks passed after the phone call and everything was peaceful-- Patton didn’t experience any resets and he took this as a good sign, enjoying the time with his family which he had dearly been missing out on. The sides were excited for the opportunity, which only grew when the callback came and went and they aced it. It was like Patton had finally achieved the dream scenario, until one day later when Thomas summoned them with a horrified look on his face.

“I skipped Lee and Mary Lee’s wedding when I went to the callback.” Was all he said.

“...Huh? How is that possible?” Virgil asked, simultaneously looking like he was going to faint and/or run away. “That couldn’t have been yesterday, could it? I mean, the odds of that…”

“It was. However…” Logan spoke up, and everyone watched as he summoned his calendar, wearing baffled expressions when he pointed to yesterday’s date-- revealing that the wedding had never been written down at all. Thomas had somehow pushed it completely out of his mind.

“But...it was for a big opportunity! Surely they’ll understand if you explain why you had to miss the wedding.” Roman argued, glancing around at the panicking sides.

“That’s the thing, they’re upset that I didn’t tell them about it beforehand and they think I blew them off on purpose. Now all of our mutual friends think I only care about myself.” Thomas stressfully looked down at his phone as he got another text message- and not a very kindly-worded one at that. “I don’t know what to do to fix this!”

Patton paled. Surely that couldn’t be right. Could things really have gotten this bad, just because he hadn’t reminded them of the wedding?

“It looks like Thomas has become a social pariah.” A smooth voice cut in. “And I’m sure you all know who’s to blame.”

No-

________________________________

The next time, Patton woke up in tears, unable to get the image of Janus turning against him out of his mind.

This time he doesn’t try to avoid the debate. Debates were crucial; they were how they got through most of their problems! In retrospect it was silly to try and skip that part of the day altogether, but at least now he had a clearer idea of what to try next. The issue from the last attempt was that Lee and Mary Lee weren’t spoken to, so this time he’d back Roman up when he suggested communication.

When they were next able to arrange a meeting to talk, Thomas explained the situation to the couple; how he had gotten a last-minute once in a lifetime offer. They were excited for him and encouraged him to take the opportunity, but Patton saw it in their eyes, how they gave Thomas sad smiles and looked at each other with disappointment.

He panicked, and Thomas changed his tune, pretending to check his phone and coming to the ‘realization’ that he got the time wrong, that he could go after all.

Lee and Mary Lee were thrilled.

But the others hated him for it.

________________________________

The next time for sure, he thought he’d get the courage to do it right.

They talked to Lee and Mary Lee. Thomas explains the situation, and this time Patton doesn’t make him change his mind. They’re disappointed, but despite knowing this deep down Thomas stays firm and decides to go to callback anyway.

During the lead-up to the 13th of April, Roman keeps looking to him for guidance, asking if this was really alright. Patton tries to assure him, but even he doesn’t know. He feels like everything he’s doing is putting them on the right track, but after thinking he was doing the right thing and being wrong several times, he isn’t able to say for certain that they were making a good choice. Especially not with the unknown variable of Lee and Mary Lee's disappointment thrown into the mix.

Eventually Roman learns to stop coming to him with his fears, and when it comes to the callback he chokes during the performance. Thomas messes up and someone else gets the role.

They don’t get to go to the wedding or win the callback.

Roman ducks out the same day and Remus takes his place.

________________________________

The next time, Patton was overly aware of his lack of certainty. He hadn’t realized how close Roman had been to falling over the edge, so during his next attempt he can't help but keep it fresh in his mind.

Throughout the debate he makes sure to agree with the creative side. He didn’t oppose any of his arguments or call him out where he originally thought he was being selfish; he’s as kind and gentle as can be, haunted by what had happened one cycle ago.

It makes Janus upset. He knows Patton’s true stance and can’t understand why he’s silencing his voice so much for one side alone. He ends up pointing out how Patton is being underhanded by trying to use flattery to get things to go his way and then mentions how that must be how he's managed to keep everyone under his thumb for so long. Patton sees red.

It’s nice to get his steadily building frustration out. Perhaps Janus is an undeserving target of his anger, but the criticism just hit too close to home for him to accept lying down. He didn't want to be a manipulative person. He had been trying so hard to let others have their voices be heard and not seize control the narrative too much, but in the end wasn't that what he was doing now? Trying to manipulate everything, even if his motives were good? The realization had blood pumping in his ears, drowning out everything but his own voice.

Everyone becomes tense when he starts yelling and Janus only stares in shock, confused and oddly enough, hurt to be the focus of the usually happy pappy's wrath. Patton yells until his throat is hoarse, and then some more because he knows he can't damage his vocal chords here. He does it for Logan, who had been pushed aside almost every time they've done this. For Virgil, who had so many doubts and fears and was too afraid to share them until they become too much. For Roman, who was the most likely to get crushed whatever they did. For Janus, who was just trying to get a seat at the table. For Remus, who potentially never would.

For himself, who just couldn't get this right.

When he's done the room is so silent that they would have been able to hear a pin drop and he feels a weight off his chest. He's made his point, loud and clear.

Even though the others have no idea what he’s talking about.

________________________________

The next time, Patton wakes up feeling guilty for losing his temper, despite how cathartic it had been to let loose a little bit. He can’t look the others in the eye when he goes to breakfast, and instead spends the whole time in his head, trying to figure out what to try next.

This time he decides to soften his voice. He already knows it’s a mistake based on prior experience, but he doesn’t know what else to do-- doesn’t have the time to consider any other approach to take before Thomas is getting that phone call once again.

Throughout the debate, his statements fall short. He lacks conviction. He subtly tries to side with Janus and Roman, but not to the extent where it makes Virgil upset, and it only makes him look flakey. He’s flimsy; uncertain, and everyone can tell. He can practically feel Logan’s desperation to take his place from the back row.

In the end, Thomas is convinced that he’s a completely horrible and selfish person due to Patton’s lack of assertion otherwise and avoids both events out of a self-induced spiral of guilt and anxiety.

________________________________

The next time Patton is too firm. He keeps assuring Thomas that he’s not a bad person, and realizes too late that he fell back into his old habits.

Roman sentences them to the wedding again.

Patton summons a pillow to scream into in frustration.

________________________________

By the 50th loop, Patton had more or less given up. He starts the day by rolling out of bed and popping open the cork of a wine bottle right into his face. It’s in the moment he starts feeling a black eye form that he makes the formal decision: fuck it.

He skips breakfast to sip wine through a silly straw (because casual alcoholism doesn’t count when you make it fun. Or when you’re stuck in a figurative nightmare), and he changes into the most ‘dad on vacation’ clothes he owned; a gaudy hawaiian shirt and cargo shorts. He forgoes shoes because decidedly this isn’t a shoes kind of day, and after 50 god-forsaken attempts at trying to get this right, he thinks he’s earned a little self-indulgence.

When the time rolls around to start the video, he belatedly rises up in the living room tispy and wearing his old 2015 new years novelty sunglasses. The others are immediately taken aback at his appearance while Thomas grimaces.

“Ah… So that’s why I’ve been thinking about cursing people out all day.”

“You should. It’d be funny.” Patton giggles.

“...Okay.” Virgil states, likely finding his behaviour too familiar for comfort. “What the fuck."

Janus doesn’t join them this time around; instead the real Logan shows up because suddenly everything had switched courses into a completely different problem. The four of them try to figure out what’s wrong with Patton, and he refuses to cooperate the entire time, just for the heck of it. Eventually he grows bored of watching them fuss and squabble, so he starts saying the first things to come to mind, the deepest opinions that were buried under all of his repression-- things he wouldn’t dare say if he were sober and free from this hell.

“I hate all of you sometimes.” He announces over their discussion without guilt, too far gone to care how hurt the faces that looked back at him were. He knew it wasn’t real anyway, at least it wouldn’t be when the next loop started.

“I hate how I can apologize forever and it’s still not enough. I hate how I have to accept the mistakes made against me, but you all get to sulk for weeks and not even let me try to make things right. When all I’ve ever wanted is to make you happy.”

“Patton-” Logan begins hesitantly. He looks like he wants to contradict him and Patton doesn't care for it.

“Stupid of me, right Logan?” He cuts him off with a laugh, dry and completely unlike himself. Logan closes his mouth, regret flashing across his face, and it just felt so good in that moment to be the bitter one for once. He’s never done it before; always having to take the high road while everyone else chose to be petty and self-absorbed in their own egos. No fault to them for that; he felt pretty amazing right now, going against the moral code he had built and adhered to for so long. It felt forbidden and like the sort of thing he’d regret later. (And heck, with all the mistakes he’d been accidentally making, perhaps doing something wrong on purpose was like taking that power back.)

“I’m doing all of this- going through this day again and again- for what?” He continues, glaring at them individually. “I’m doing my best here- just to make everything alright again, and- fuck.”

Patton ignores the shocked expression he gets when he swears. He’s getting too close to feeling bad again, so he summons another bottle of wine. He learns from his mistake and points it away from himself this time, and the cork doesn’t hit him in the face; instead it smashes into the tv screen. Roman and Virgil yelp. Thomas stares.

“...Patton, what are you talking about?” Thomas asks.

“I suppose it doesn’t matter.” Patton giggles again after taking a long swig, sliding back against the blinds until he's on the floor. Away from the cameras, at last. “None of you will remember this anyway.”

And they don’t. (They never do)

________________________________

The next time, he wakes up without a black eye or a hangover and considers not leaving his bed today. He does anyway, just to make sure he hadn’t done something irreversible and ruined everything for real this time.

He goes to the kitchen to find everyone sitting like they always do, in the exact same positions at the exact same time with the exact same food, without fail. They acknowledge him the same way they always do as he enters the room and he can’t help but grind his teeth when it feels like mocking. So he walks over to the cupboard and starts pulling out plates to smash against the ground.

They’re surprised, worried, taken aback, and as he stands in a sea of broken china he doesn’t care about what they have to think about him. He already knows nothing he does right now will have later consequences, even if it means cutting up his feet like an idiot.

He’ll just have to do better next time.

________________________________

He doesn’t do better. Instead, he gives into the urge to stay in bed all day. No one comes for him and the discussion happens without him, which he knows because he resists the summons to go testify.

Maybe Logan got to be the lawyer this time. That’d be nice, he supposes. ________________________________

The next time he sets fire to his room, just to see what it would feel like to see everything he cares for burn.

(It doesn't feel much like anything, because he already knows it'll be back the next day. He hates it in unspeakable amounts when he's proven right.)

________________________________

The next, he goes over to the other half of the mindscape and steals Janus’ hat, feeling a bit more carefree as the side pursues him around the mindscape and the rest of the day is derailed.

________________________________

The next, he tries to make a cake to celebrate the callback and accidentally burns it. He feels like there's some sort of cosmic irony there.

________________________________

The next, he does nothing but make puns until the others cry in frustration.

________________________________

Next, he goes to the other half of the mindscape again and hangs out with Remus all day, just to check up on him after not seeing him since he took Roman’s place that one time.

Remus tries to attack him several times but Patton is past the point of being afraid of him. At one point he catches the shuriken Remus throws at his head and he finally manages to earn his favour.

They end up having a good time, talking until everything resets again.

________________________________

Next, he kisses everyone on the cheek and apologizes for getting drunk and being mean to them.

(Despite them being reseted versions of themselves and therefore not remembering any of it. He still does it anyway and it still makes him feel slightly better afterwards).

________________________________

Next, he finds the energy to make a genuine effort once again.

This time Logan ducks out. Patton spends the next few loops in mourning.

________________________________

By around the 75th loop, he’s finally had enough. There’s no more fun to be had messing around with these constantly-reseting sides, and he’s so so tired of trying to keep the peace and failing. Nothing he does was working-- in fact it seemed like he was just making things worse based on the amount of times one of the sides had broken down in front of them or tried to duck out or left with undealt with emotions. (There were so many things he had seen that would stick with him for a while, wondering just how close they were to having something similar happen in reality. He couldn't even rest anymore, kept awake by the questions.)

If he were a different side, one more accustomed to problem solving, perhaps he would’ve had a solution by now, but he just doesn’t. It's not how he was meant to operate. So instead of trying to figure it out, he goes to Virgil’s room after breakfast and starts blubbering in front of him until he’s led onto his bed where he's awkwardly consoled.

Virgil, without even knowing why he’s upset, places a comforting hand on his back anyway which sends Patton into even greater sobs. It had been so long since he'd let someone hug him or show him affection- so upset with himself for his failings that he stopped believing that he deserved any of it. This time he just lets it happen because he needs some comfort and if he doesn't get it he doesn't know how he'll be able to continue forward.

The two of them end up moving to a more neutral part of the mindscape as to not make his feelings worse, and he allows himself to indulge in just being held. He's aware of exactly how long they have until the start of the debate, so he milks his time with Virgil for all he's got, until eventually his crying evens out into sniffles, leaving him with tired eyes and a runny nose.

He knows Virgil wants to ask what’s wrong, but he breaks the silence first when he finally manages to calm down.

“Do you know how to get out of a loop?”

He can’t see Virgil’s face from where they’re hugging, but he can tell that he’s at odds with the question.

“You’re asking me, the MVP of spiralling, how to get out of a loop?” Virgil asked unbelievingly.

“Yeah, you’re right- It was stupid.” Patton begins, pulling away before Virgil stops him.

“I didn’t say that.” He says quickly, worriedly. Then he goes quiet in deliberate thought. “...You have to rely on the people around you to get out of it, I guess.”

When Patton makes a questioning noise, he continues.

“I mean… Sometimes it’s all you can do, y’know? You’re always gonna be biased when you’re living in your own head, and if you’re struggling to get through something yourself... the best thing to do is ask for help. Get a different viewpoint.”

"Sounds scary." Patton laughs wetly. Virgil joins him, sounding relieved.

"Yeah. It's definitely not as easy as it sounds. Being vunerable and reaching out to people, that is."

"...How do you manage?"

"Well..." Virgil pulls back a little. "I don't always. But you just have to trust that it'll be worth it in the end. And it usually is."

After a moment of thinking that over, Patton draws back fully and stares at him. Virgil meets his eyes with barely-veiled worry as he continues. “So… If you’re dealing with something, you can always tell us. You should know by now that you don't have to deal with everything alone, popstar.”

Patton can't meet his gaze any longer when his eyes heat up once more. "...I just want to be there for all of you," He finally admits in a small voice. "It's my one goal, and I feel like I only let you down. I can't expect you to carry my problems with you, on top of that."

Virgil's frown deepens. "It's not us carrying a burden for you, Pat. It's sharing the load equally so you don't fall under the pressure." His hand found Patton's back again, rubbing small circles. "If you feel like you have to be the one to fix everything all the time, then maybe we failed you as friends."

Once again, the dam broke, and Patton sincerely did not know what to say to that. Virgil pulled him back to his side, letting Patton rest his head on his shoulder as he let out his second round of tears for the day. They were spending too much time talking about his issues, he realized as the video started once more, but Virgil didn't make any move to leave his side, and for the nth time that day, he was incredibly greatful to him.

Something about their conversation clicked in his brain, and it was like he knew exactly what he needed to do. When he was finally ready to let go of this day, he gave Virgil one last hug and thanked him for his advice. He then sunk out back to his room and fell into bed, waiting for the cycle to start over again.

Perhaps he had known all along what he would have to do to end this, and Virgil had given him the final shove.

Either way, he so was ready for it to be over.

________________________________

On the final loop, Patton decided to follow Virgil’s advice.

He goes back to acting as normal-- eating breakfast, getting the call, rising up, reminding them about the wedding-- and this time he doesn’t do anything especially different.

Unlike his previous attempts where he tried to change his tune, tried to see through every possibility, tried to stop arguments before they started; he instead tries to do everything the same way the original debate had gone, to be the best of his memory.

He didn’t falter when he said things he now knew to be insensitive, he didn’t hold back on disagreeing with the others, or insert himself into problems that weren’t his to help with yet. He watched as the cracks formed between each side, watched the gavel swing down, watched every other side sink out after shooing Janus away.

And he knew it would be just fine.

He looked into Thomas’ eyes and felt nothing but pride. Just like the real thing, this one looked uncertain, but was briefly relieved by the conclusion they came to, putting his trust in Patton as he reassured him in his decision. He knew that by choosing this route he was accepting the heartbreak that would come later, but he accepted that. He understood now that hiding in fantasies of getting everything perfect was counterproductive and unrealistic. He knew it was time to go back.

As he sunk out to his room for the final time, he realized that if this exercise taught him anything, it was that above making the right choices, above having the right things to say to fix everyone’s problems, all he needed, all along…

Was patience.

________________________________

Patton opened his eyes to the sight of dim spotlights overhead. With a loud dad grunt he was glad no one else was around to hear, he rolled over to sit on the edge of the stage, looking out to the seat in the crowd he had once been impersonated at.

He took in the room once last time before the lights continued to dim, which he instinctually knew to be the mind’s way of telling him to leave. He was ready for it; so he did.

Hopping off of the stage, he walked between the aisles towards the exit, pushing the doors open to be greeted with the familiar space of the mindscape. He stood there for a second, letting his eyes adjust from the darkness of the theatre as his memory slowly returned to him-- compressing the months he had just gone through until he could remember why he had come here in the first place.

“So.” He heard a familiar voice come from next to him as he regained his bearings. “Are you satisfied with what you found?”

“...Yeah.” Patton said softly, turning to smile at the figure.

“And?”

“I didn’t need to change anything in the end.”

There was a sharp exhale, barely a scoff. “Well, I could’ve told you that, and it would’ve saved you a lot of hassle.”

“You could have.” Patton agreed. “...But it was helpful seeing all the way things could have been different, too.”

His eyes fell to the ground, recalling the different outcomes that were wildly different and much much worse than their current situation. It made him grateful for the way everything had turned out-- imperfect but not broken-- and made everything seem so much less bleak than how he first thought it to be. When he was so lost that he had chosen to relive that day for the sake of getting peace.

“Oh? And what exactly happened in there?”

“A lot. One time I stole your hat. You got so mad that you started hissing.” Patton’s smile widened at one of the better memories, even more so when his friend grumbled.

“Wow. I’m so glad the hour I spent out here waiting was used productively.” Janus sighed, pulling his hat down subconsciously. “...I am glad that it helped, though.”

“I am too.” Patton hummed. “Are you ready?”

“As I’ll ever be.”

Janus finally returned his smile and Patton brightened up. They weren't yet confident that they could fix everything that had happened between the sides, they didn’t even know if it was possible for them to do so alone, but they were at least willing to take that step forward and offer a helping hand.

And that's all that matters, right? No matter how many times they were let down or faced an obstacle, they just kept getting up to try to be better. It didn't matter if things weren't alright again right away; sometimes earning forgiveness meant trusting the other person to come back to you eventually. Waiting for that opportunity to glue back the pieces together.

And if Patton was certain about anything, it was that he was more than prepared to wait.

________________________________

Tags: @nasatshirts @quinnthequeer @mayflowers07 @overlad-of-the-snakes @varthandi @foxxsong @omnicrex @nadiestar @mistythegirlfluxmess @greenninjagal-blog @hit-or-mish @slytherin-halfblood @i-need-a-life-8903 @lemonlinelights @logicaemetus @bluestarfan10 @marshmallow-fluffy @enby-phoenix @arrestjellyfish @its-the-usda-certified-trashman @impatentpending @killjoy-3000 @nonasficcollection @mhep24601 @atomic-cat-dragon @puffydove @qrowdraws-notforyouthough @randommuffinyt @bubblycricket @theactual-devil @viana-dascolli @modsnow

#my writing #sanders sides #patton sanders #janus sanders #remus sanders #virgil sanders #logan sanders #roman sanders #platonic drlamp #patton and the no-good day #patton angst #OOF IT'S DONE

804 notes · View notes

clint-ftm-barton · 3 years

Text

Heyo I never post fic here bc it’s my main but also nothing exists lol u feel me so here you go

(Pls interact with this if you like it tho bc I’m self conscious 😭)

Pairing: (pre-) polyfrogs, Nursey/Chowder

Nursey loves his boyfriend, don’t get him wrong. He would never cheat - that just isn’t his style - and if he ever felt the desire to be exclusive with someone else, he’d break up with his boyfriend first. But he doesn’t want to break up with Chowder!

He and Chris are super happy too! Derek has absolutely no complaints about their relationship. In fact, he’s head over heels for the goalie.

Trouble is, he also has a major crush on his roommate. Like, major. Bad. Daydreams about crawling into bed with him and kissing those stupid freckles until Dex is giggling bad. (God, Nursey loves his giggles.)

And it’s kind of tearing him up. Why can’t he just have both of them? Why can’t there be two of him? One for C and one for Dexy. Is that so much to ask? And no, he will not be asking anyone on the team for advice, thank you. They already chirp him enough for the starry eyes he makes at Chowder. The LAST thing he needs is word getting out that he also has a crush on their token ginger. He can barely afford the fines as-is.

No, no, no. He’s just going to suffer. That’s the only solution. He can’t break up with Chowder - he loves him too much. Besides, Dex is straight anyway. Derek will get over it eventually.

——————

Chowder loves Nursey. Everyone on the team knows as much. Everyone on the team has had to fine them at least twice, it’s not exactly a secret. But Chowder has a secret that not even Nursey, his love, knows. A dirty little secret, if you will.

Will. That’s just it. Chris has the biggest crush on Will. Like. As big of a crush on Will that he used to have on Derek. Obviously he’s dating Derek and he’s not dating Will but.

The crush sort of developed after they’d already started dating. Will is Derek’s roommate - plus their teammate - and it’s a little hard to NOT include him in some of the things they do as a couple. It’s fun to have him come along anyway! It doesn’t feel like he’s third-wheeling, at least not to Chris.

Chowder would never cheat on Nursey! That’s not his point. He loves Nursey and feels so grateful to have him as his boyfriend. He just also has a crush on Dex. Which, like, as long as he doesn’t act on it doesn’t even matter, does it? So what if he pictures himself spooning with Dex sometimes. Or - even better - himself and Nursey spooning with Dex. (Dex in the middle cause, well, why not? Or maybe they could switch it up? Not the point.) But it doesn’t matter. He has to tell himself it doesn’t matter. Cause otherwise it would consume his thoughts all the time and then where would he be?

It doesn’t matter. He’s happy with Nursey, and he’ll allow himself to have his little crush, he’ll just have to stifle it until it goes away one day.

——————

Dex has a problem and it’s a fucking big problem. Well, maybe not that big in the grand scheme of things, but he’s allowed some dramatics every now and then.

The fact of the matter is he has a crush on his roommate’s boyfriend. But that’s not all. No, of course it has to be bigger than that. Because of course it does.

No, see, not only does he have a crush on Chowder, but he’s got a crush on Chowder’s boyfriend. That’s right. Both of them. Fucking Nursey too.

At first he thought he was just lonely. Nursey and Chowder got together and he was as hyped for them as the rest of the team was! He still is. They’re such a cute couple. Plus, they’re super chill with keeping up with regular frogs nights and all that.

But that’s sort of the problem. He started out feeling like a third wheel, even when they insisted he wasn’t, and then he watched them become so natural around each other. And then, one night he realized he wants to be a part of it. And not just like a friend or a roommate or a teammate. Of course not. The worst part is that it’s both of them.

There isn’t a single part of him that wants to break them up. No, he’d rather quit the team and move back home to Maine before ever doing that. But… if there was any way that he could just… sandwich himself right in the middle of it all. Or - fuck it - he’ll take a one night threesome at this point.

…Maybe he really is lonely, he supposes. Whatever. It’s not like it’s going to happen anyway.

Instead he’ll just sort of… watch. It sounds weird to think of it that way, but he has no other descriptor. He’s their friend and that’s it. They’re so fuckin happy anyway, it’s not like they’d even bother giving him a second thought. Not like he blames them! Just. Kinda sucks. Whatever. He’ll be fine. He’ll find someone of his own one day. Maybe not until after college, but he can survive until then.

Right?

#idk lol lmk if you want a sequel #basically they’re all dumbasses #will anyone even read this #polyfrogs #check please #derek nurse #will poindexter #chris chow #fanfic #mine

34 notes · View notes

swissmissficrecs · 3 years

Note

Can you recommend fics which are fluffy but explicit as well? :D I have just read a super angsty fic and I need to see my boys happy. Thanks x

Reply: First off, I have these fluff-related rec lists, but not all of them are high-rated and some also have quite a bit of angst:

Fluff Master List

Fluff (more since the previous master list) + even more fluff and good feels

Then from my bookmarks, I have culled these E-rated Johnlock fics that should be fairly light on the angst and high on the fluff & romance:

A Family Trait by cumberqueer (12K, E, Johnlock) Set post-S4, John is back at home with Rosie in Baker Street. He's working on a lot of things, including building his trust with Sherlock once more. An emergency shift at the clinic jumpstarts the process, forcing John to leave Rosie at home with only Sherlock to watch her. Sherlock does his best and John makes a mistake, but everyone is happy in the end.

An Approximation to Perfection by TooSel (22K, E, Johnlock) Sherlock realises just how good the sex John had with his last girlfriend was. The solution is simple: he's going to do everything in his power to ensure that their own sex life stays interesting. Only that it's never quite that easy.

And if you say the word, I could stay with you by CaitlinFairchild (12K, E, Johnlock) What Sherlock thinks is, On the day I die, be it in a dirty alley at forty or in my bed at eighty, the last thing I will remember is tonight, the way you looked at at me on the snowy pavement, cheeks pink with the cold, breath puffing in frosty white clouds, your heart in your eyes and snowflakes in your hair. I will remember that single perfect moment in my life, that moment I knew I had everything I ever wanted, and whatever happens next, I will die content. What he says is simply, "Marry me."

Clutter-Free by MissDavis (13K, E, Johnlock) 5 times John made Sherlock clean up the flat and one time he didn't have to.

Full Circle by cumberqueer (13K, E, Johnlock) Sherlock Holmes has noticed that his best friend and crime-solving partner John Watson is doing well - too well for what they've been through, if you ask him. Sherlock is worried John is seeing someone that is making him very happy, and intends to find out who. But first: data. Featuring a spreadsheet of John Watson's Smiles, a parentlock makeover for 221b, and John being charming af.

If There Were Any Time For A Miracle by Berty (31K, E, Johnlock) John and Sherlock are spending Christmas at the Holmes' family home. Sherlock has a plan that John doesn't know about. John has a wish that Sherlock doesn't know about. If there were any time for a miracle, this would be it.

I'll Follow You Into the Dark by fearfully_beautifully_made (19K, E, Johnlock) ...A story about two men who have had a very tough couple of years and are long overdue for a little tenderness and healing. Or four times that one of the boys wake each other up from a Nightmare and one time when it is not a Nightmare. ;)

In July of This Year by yaycoffee (12K, E, Johnlock) There is an oft-cited experiment discussed in classrooms and cocktail parties alike, a convenient analogy when one endeavors to make a point about not noticing the obvious until it is inevitable. Simply, if you place a frog on a hot plate, it will jump off immediately, but if you put that frog on a cool plate and turn up the heat slowly, slowly, it will simply burn. Or: How these two idiots melt together, finally.

Johnlock Advent 2018 by sussexbound (47K, E, Johnlock) A collaboration between @honeybeelullaby, @chained-to-the-mirror, and myself. @honeybeelullaby provided the wonderful prompts, @chained-to-the-mirror drew pictures based on those, and I wrote a ficlet for each one.

Merlot by Itsallfine (14K, E, Johnlock) Sherlock and John work toward becoming something more as they prepare to host the Holmes parents at 221B for the holidays.

Put a Little Love in Your Heart by MissDavis (16K, E, Johnlock) Sherlock Holmes and John Watson will both tell you that they are not sentimental men, and that neither thinks the holiday season is anything more than a series of dates on a calendar. Don't believe a word they say.

State of Flux by Atiki (24K, E, Johnlock) John’s marriage is over and he is finally back home (i.e. at Baker Street, where he belongs). Sherlock is awfully insecure and John is awfully hesitant, and they're both awkward idiots, of course, but they figure it out. Many First Times happen.

The Allowables by cwb (14K, E, Johnlock) Got your email. Your idea of whispering filth to me in public is genius. ALWAYSI thought you might like that. CBTM

To Feed Your Hunger by FinAmour (21K, E, Johnlock) What does a kiss say, after all? A kiss is a gift. A kiss is a promise. A kiss says, “You’re mine, and I’m yours.” John exhales. “Can I kiss you?” Sherlock is trembling in his arms. “If you don’t,” he murmurs roughly, “I may lose my mind.”

To Keep Quiet by Salambo06 (11K, E, Johnlock) Four days. In the end, that’s all it takes for Sherlock to accept the fact that there is a chance John might be feeling just as desperate for more as he is.Still, it doesn’t change the fact that they need to talk. Sherlock counts it down to four conversations in total, at least. He’s certain John is just as aware of this fact as he is, but still, Sherlock finds himself unable to think of any plan of action.

Undersea-Rainbows by agirlsname (11K, E, Johnlock) If John ever saw a picture of how Sherlock gazes at him when he isn't looking, things would turn around very quickly for them.

Winning the Goat by ArwaMachine (17K, E, Johnlock) The life that Sherlock and John have together is rather unusual. Sometimes they lounge about the flat with their daughter. Sometimes they flee for their lives from a band of organ-harvesting criminals. Sometimes they shag. Sometimes Sherlock insists upon arguing with John about the Monty Hall problem for weeks on end. Somehow, they love each other. Somehow, it all works.

#request #fluff #rec list #could-be-dangerous-sh

46 notes · View notes

this-is-my-metanoia · 3 years

Text

𝔭𝔬𝔢𝔱𝔦𝔠 𝔩𝔦𝔠𝔢𝔫𝔰𝔢 - 𝔥𝔬𝔴 𝔱𝔬 𝔩𝔬𝔳𝔢 𝔟𝔞𝔱𝔰

Whenever asked what my favorite animal was, I found it hard to answer – just like every other ‘favorite’ question. However, over the past year I have finally decided and chose my answer, although I know it’s not typical.

I love bats.

Now, when most people think of bats, their negative reputation comes to mind. Unfortunately, a lot of people associate them with death, fear, evil, bad omens, etc. Traditional “bad” characters such as witches, are often portrayed in the company of bats. Demons are another example, sometimes depicted to have bat-like wings. Most notably, vampires are traditionally shown to be able to transform themselves into bats, with the imagery of blood sucking associated with it.

However, there is a deeper symbolism to the deeply misunderstood animal.

It is true, bats can symbolize death – but not necessarily in a negative sense. They represent, to be more specific, death and rebirth. The animals symbolize letting go of the old and bringing in the new. They are symbols of transition and the start of a new beginning. Bats are also a symbol of communication since indigenous cultures discovered and observed bats to be a highly social creature. They have strong family ties, displaying their sensitivity, nurturing nature, and sensitivity to members of their group. In Chinese culture, they represent good luck and fortune. In that same culture, a group of 5 bats represent ‘The Five Blessings’, or wufu 五福. These are the blessings of long life, wealth, health, love of virtue and a peaceful death.

Overall, bats represent and are symbols of illusion, rebirth, intuition, initiation, journey, inner depth ,and communication. Nothing like its negative stereotype.

Given my very strong defensive stance when it comes to this animal, I was of course drawn to the poem How to Love Bats by Judith Beveridge. The poem is as follows:

---

Begin in a cave.

Listen to the floor boil with rodents, insects.

Weep for the pups that have fallen. Later,

you’ll fly the narrow passages of those bones,

but for now —

open your mouth, out will fly names

like Pipistrelle, Desmodus, Tadarida. Then,

listen for a frequency

lower than the seep of water, higher

than an ice planet hibernating

beyond a glacier of Time.

Visit op shops. Hide in their closets.

Breathe in the scales and dust

of clothes left hanging. To the underwear

and to the crumbled black silks — well,

give them your imagination

and plenty of line, also a night of gentle wind.

By now your fingers should have

touched petals open. You should have been dreaming

each night of anthers and of giving

to their furred beauty

your nectar-loving tongue. But also,

your tongue should have been practising the cold

of a slippery, frog-filled pond.

Go down on your elbows and knees.

You’ll need a spieliologist’s desire for rebirth

and a miner’s paranoia of gases —

but try to find within yourself

the scent of a bat-loving flower.

Read books on pogroms. Never trust an owl.

Its face is the biography of propaganda.

Never trust a hawk. See its solutions

in the fur and bones of regurgitated pellets.

And have you considered the smoke

yet from a moving train? You can start

half an hour before sunset,

but make sure the journey is long, uninterrupted

and that you never discover

the faces of those Trans-Siberian exiles.

Spend time in the folds of curtains.

Seek out boarding-school cloakrooms.

Practise the gymnastics of wet umbrellas.

Are you

floating yet, thought-light,

without a keel on your breastbone?

Then, meditate on your bones as piccolos,

on mastering the thermals

beyond the tremolo; reverberations

beyond the lexical.

Become adept

at describing the spectacles of the echo —

but don’t watch dark clouds

passing across the moon. This may lead you

to fetishes and cults that worship false gods

by lapping up bowls of blood from a tomb.

Practise echo-locating aerodromes,

stamens. Send out rippling octaves

into the fossils of dank caves —

then edit these soundtracks

with a metronome of dripping rocks, heartbeats

and with a continuous, high-scaled wondering

about the evolution of your own mind.

But look, I must tell you — these instructions

are no manual. Months of practice

may still only win you appreciation

of the acoustical moth,

hatred of the hawk and owl. You may need

to observe further the floating black host

through the hills.

---

Now, what I love about this poem is how it has the reader picture and imagine itself as a bat. It's a beautiful piece of work that describe the true nature of this animal.

"Begin in a cave."

"Weep for the pups that have fallen. Later,

you’ll fly the narrow passages of those bones,"

The opening words are interesting, as it has death introduced immediately. It isn't necessarily a bad thing - it is simply just life. Bats are known to live in caves, it's where they are born and most likely, where they die. Life begins and eventually comes to an end. It can be sad, and we may grieve, but it all has its time and place. It's no different for these creatures - they feel the joys of birth, and the sadness of death.

"open your mouth, out will fly names

like Pipistrelle, Desmodus, Tadarida"

Pipistrelle, Desmodus and Tadarida are actually geneses of bats, all with their own unique traits. This was just a small detail I found interesting.

"You should have been dreaming

each night of anthers and of giving

to their furred beauty

your nectar-loving tongue. But also,

your tongue should have been practising the cold

of a slippery, frog-filled pond."

The description here to me is describing two specific species of nectar-feeding bats: the lesser long-nosed bat and the Mexican long-tongued bat. These animals do exactly as the poem describes, and drink nectar from flowers. It's a pretty description of their feeding habits, not at all the dark, fear driven automatic assumption of drinking blood (although the Vampire Bat does drink blood, it is not the only species). Bats usually have to swoop down in order to drink water, and there are some species that eat frogs - something the author might have known, hence the description of a "slippery, frog filled pond". But all in all - bats need to feed and drink just as we do.

Perhaps one of my favorite parts of the poem, however, is the last section:

"But look, I must tell you — these instructions

are no manual. Months of practice

may still only win you appreciation

of the acoustical moth,

hatred of the hawk and owl. You may need

to observe further the floating black host

through the hills."

To me, the author is saying how their written "instructions" on how to be a bat, how to appreciate the creatures, may only teach the reader small facts. This includes predators such as hawks and owls, like it mentions. The last line, however, tells the reader that further observation is required. They can be told information all day long, but it is better for them to see it themselves, to understand the animal through their own research. Hopefully then, this deeply misunderstood animal can be loved by others as well.

#poem #poetry #humanities #literature #bat #bats #judith beveridge

3 notes · View notes

foximator-blog · 3 years

Text

It took me longer than I meant to, but I finally have all of my Electric Heart AU designs for the Mega man 4 robots done.

Bright man was built to illuminate and oversee jobs that are made dangerous by a lack of light, such as night time construction or underground mining. The bulb on top of his head and his smaller flash light arm use a lot of energy, so Dr. Cossack built a separate battery for his lights rather than letting his primary power core drain out completely. Bright man loves brain exercises and coming up with solutions to problems, which often results in him getting many "Bright ideas". Though these bright ideas happening suddenly often results in many a blinded eye. After Wily kidnapped Kalinka, Cossack installed a buster so that Bright man could help rescue her, unfortunately Wily reprogrammed all of Cossack's robots before the rescue could happen. His element is Light for obvious reasons, and his weakness is Rain flush due to rain messing up electronics.

Toad man is an agricultural robot who aids in the growth of crops during dry seasons by creating artificial rainfall with a specialized nutrient rich liquid solution. He loves his job, and is very knowledgeable and all types of garden plants and crops. Snake woman loves to tease him, which he very much dislikes, so he's often looking for garden slugs he can use to scare her off. He was going to use his jumping ability to rescue Kalinka, but then Wily reprogrammed him and replaced his rainfall solution with a strange acid. His Element is Life, as he was made to help plant growth (and because toads aren't in water as much as frogs are) and his Weakness is Drill bomb.

Drill man is a mining and construction robot built with a highly durable body in case of accidental cave-ins. He loves to work quickly and efficiently, but he lacks proper planning skills. This does lead to accidents as one would imagine, but he once found a hot spring on the job, and he was commended for it. His Drill bombs are already a powerful weapon on their own, so it's no surprise Wily chose to reprogram him. His element is Earth, and his Weakness is Dive missile, as it can easily shoot through his armor.

Built for tomb and cave exploration, Pharoah Man is equipped with highly sensitive camera eyes for dimly lit environments, a special Tutankhaman mask for warding off curses, and the ability to produce miniature suns so he can charge his solar power core while underground or deep in a tomb. Despite being made for archeology, he takes each expedition seriously and takes great care not to desecrate graves. While initially a Fire type when built, he somehow gained the ability to levitate and teleport after going on several expeditions, and his suns started to take a more unnatural color. According to Pharoah Man, these abilities are "gifts from the spirits" and this results in his Undead typing. He is the robot besides Skull woman closest to Kalinka, and he was ready to use his supernatural powers to rescue her, but then Wily intervened and reprogrammed him. Because of his sensitive camera eyes, his Weakness is Flash stopper.

Dust man is a clumsy robot who was built for cleaning and transporting garbage, and he does so by sucking it up into the vacuum duct on his head... which is his mouth oddly enough... He has a big appetite, and is a compulsive cleaner, so it's often hard for him to stop eating. His mostly trash based diet results in bad breath, which is something he hates to have pointed out, and his clumsiness often results in scratches or dents he patches up with duct tape. Besides being able to gather and shoot big clumps of garbage from his main duct, he is also able to weaponize and shoot smaller bits from his buster. His element is Air, since vacuums suck things in and shoot things out via Air pressure, and his Weakness is Ring boomerang, as it jams his vacuum duct and causes him to choke a bit. The ring boomerang is also fairly sharp.

Built for Marine exploration and fishing, Dive man is a submarine robot with the disposition of a naval officer, which is why he hates Pirate Man. Through the power of water pressure, he can propel himself both forward and backwards through water, or launch his Dive missile. Though impressive and environmentally friendly, this also has a flaw that causes him to spin uncontrollably and shoot forward quickly... which doesn't bode well for Dive man as he sometimes suffers from sea sickness. Despite how painful this flaw is, Wily would weaponize it when reprogramming Dive man anyway. Obviously his element is Water, and his Weakness is Skull barrier... since he's a robot focused on offense, it's good to have a strong defense, though his Weakness may also be a reference to sailor superstition surrounding skulls or spirits.

When Wily kidnapped Kalinka and blackmailed Cossack, Wily forced the good scientist to build two more robots solely for fighting Mega man, and he gave Cossack two rough concepts to work off of. One was for a buff male blade robot... but instead of building that, Cossack built a robot with Ring shaped boomerangs that would be hard to shoot down, and made her a female simply to spite Wily. Ring woman is the most competitive of the two combat oriented robots, and after Mega man stopped Wily and Proto man saved Kalinka, Ring and Skull would go on to become body guards for the Cossack family. Ring woman loves to practice gymnastics and ply ring toss, but she hates kids who aren't Kalinka... so she stays at Cossack's side while Skull takes Kalinka to school. Her element is Magic, as she technically has a toy theme, though some people think her theme is Space (Magic includes both), and her weakness is Pharoah shot, most likely in reference to gold being a metal with a low melting point.

Alongside the buff blade bot, Wily also had another rough concept, but the other was for an utterly terrifying and destructive robot built in the likeness of Wily's Doc robots. Not wanting to create something so hideous and destructive, Cossack Built a defensive guardian spirit robot instead in the form of Skull woman. Based on heavy defense, Skull woman's primary weapon is a shield, and she takes her role as Kalinka's body guard very seriously. It's also rumored that Skull woman's unmasked face looks similar to that of a lost loved one... resulting in Skull woman developing an even closer bond with her family. She loves to watch horror movies, but hates Dust man's breath and Shade man's singing. Her element is Undead, and her weakness is Dust cluster, in reference to bones decaying at a much faster rate when exposed to Air and dust. It's also worth noting her Skull barrier causes her systems to overheat if she keeps it up for too long, and the Dust cluster clogs up the exhaust ports she uses to cool down.

In the original version of Mega man 4, Ring man is only built to fight Mega man, and not to be a detective like he was in Mega mix. That felt like something that would come later in the line, which is why I moved Ring in between Dive and Skull.

#megaman #au #megaman 4 #bright man #toad man #drill man #pharoah man #dust man #dive man #ring man #skull man #electric heart

20 notes · View notes

tosikoarts · 4 years

Text

SFW Alphabet | L Lawliet

L is here too, wow. You can check tosikowrites tag for more. Warning: there’s a lot, again.

A = Affection (How affectionate are they? How do they show affection?)

Here is the thing: сhildren receiving inadequate affection may manifest stunted physical growth despite receiving adequate nutrition, so you can imagine what it can do to the emotional growth and perception of other people. Watari tried to cultivate kindness, mercy, love equally in his wards but it is impossible considering how many orphans reside in Wammy’s house. Little L was more interested in the world’s famous inventions, books, riddles than in other children, and now you have to face the consequences.

He has to start from scratch. In the beginning L sticks to mimicking affection given to him. You bought him a box of chocolate, he will buy you a box of eclairs. You ruffled his hair, he will play with yours, twisting it on finger. You hugged him and he will hug you whenever feels convenient. At some point he will find new ways of showing his love.

Understanding that he can do other things too gave him insight. He can try this, and that, and ask you if you liked it or not, wow. L’s curiosity will take over: different types of kisses, various cuddle positions, playful fights, nights out, nights in – he wants to do it all.

Well, not everything is so rosy. During work, he forgets what he has learned and goes back to his old self. Sadly, this won’t change no matter what.

B = Best friend (What would they be like as a best friend? How would the friendship start?)

Where to begin? How do you even get this man to be your friend? You don’t. He chooses you and then suddenly, - boom! – you’re best friends forever, it is established fact. But before it happens, he will study you like an ant under a magnifying glass.

There is not a lot of places where he can find a person with an IQ close to his. High chance L will look for a friend among the best FBI agents or fellow detectives.

Friends who judge people together stay together. He is a person who likes to spill some tea and throw a little shade for entertainment.

Sarcasm and irony are things that no conversation can go without, so L wants a person who doesn’t get offended right away and can keep up with it.

C = Cuddles (Do they like to cuddle? How would they cuddle?)

The best way to make L shut up is to cuddle him. No way he will refuse a good cuddle session when in private, but will hesitate if someone else is around.

He’s 100% touch-starved. All cuddle positions are fine, but if you want to knock him out completely go for face to face cuddle while on his lap. Now he can’t sit in frog-like position (so his IQ has already dropped) and there’s person playing with his hair? Congratulation, L has fallen.

D = Domestic (Do they want to settle down? How are they at cooking and cleaning?)

D stands for domestic and disaster when it comes to both cooking and cleaning. Even though he would love to settle down and retire from detective work, he has no skills when it comes to the most basic things. His whole life someone else took care for those little unimportant tasks so he could push human mind to its limit, and now it’s too late for relearning. When he tries to cook it never ends up well, you just have to accept this man’s futility and move on.

E = Ending (If they had to break up with their partner, how would they do it?)

There was nothing surprising that he had to break up with you. No other possible ending for such relationship, absurd and strange, and with someone like him. L will choose cruel ghosting because explanation is for losers and emotionally mature people. One day he vanishes from your radar: no more messages, no more calls, nobody knows him because L never met your friends. Conscience continues to nibble him for two weeks or so, he has to continuously fight desire to contact you and he would miserably fail if there was no Kira to occupy all of his free time.

F = Fiance(e) (How do they feel about commitment? How quick would they want to get married?)

Two to three years are enough for him to pop a question. Those months were spent in careful study and relationship viability assessment. Let’s be real, he will put person he likes in tricky situations just to evaluate their reaction. Manipulative? Yes. Cruel? Yes. Weird? Yes. He won’t allow anything extreme though. After all, he learned a lot about human interactions and developed undoubtedly strong feelings for them. In addition, he will propose during trip to Kyoto, when visiting Kiyomizu-dera with its famous Love Shrine. Right after “Why would I walk between these stones if I already found you?”.

G = Gentle (How gentle are they, both physically and emotionally?)

In the beginning his level of gentleness is somewhere between a log and jar of jam. Day by day, week by week L realizes that all of his actions come down to the will to care, love, protect, - and guess what? – these three have to be gentle in order to fit the definition of healthy relationship. He allows himself to grow emotionally. If we talk about physical sphere, he is very cautious from the beginning and tries to fight his natural stiffness so another person can feel his love.

H = Hugs (Do they like hugs? How often do they do it? What are their hugs like?)

It’s another of his weakness. L wasn’t properly hugged as a child and it took a toll on him: when you hug him for first time, he is stiff and awkward. Second time is better, but his hands on your back still feel like a mannequin’s grip.

L grows fond of warmth and comfort pretty fast and he starts to initiate hugs himself. His favorite part of the day is when he tiptoes to you from behind, grabs you in bear hug, and you both fall on the sofa/bed/anything soft enough to leave you without bruises.

I = I love you (How fast do they say the L-word?)

He suddenly blurted it out after only 3 months of dating. It sounded so innocent, affectionate, sincere, that he shut up for a minute to rethink what just happened. He totally meant what he said, of course, but at the same time, he was not sure it was the right moment, the right tone, even the right choice of words. L will try to explain what he wanted to say in trembling voice but will not say anything coherent because L.exe stopped working.

J = Jealousy (How jealous do they get? What do they do when they’re jealous?)

Because of how hard it is to let new people in, L becomes very attached to those who have overcome all obstacles and decided to stay in his life. Thus fear of abandonment arises, and so does jealousy.

He is not paranoid about where you are and who you spend your time, but he doesn’t mind knowing it. You don’t want to use a tracker on your phone? Too bad, maybe, he’s already installed it. For your safety only.

Easily jealous and will need a lot of reassurance despite immediately becoming distant and silent. It is another way of manipulation because what if you do leave him all alone?

K = Kisses (What are their kisses like? Where do they like to kiss you? Where do they like to be kissed?)

Again, he didn’t have a lot of practice so L’s kisses are sloppy and a little rough. His lips are always chapped because of constant licking and biting during intense thought process, and they feel a little dry on your skin. Because of this (and awkwardness, of course) L will quickly shift kisses into cuddles or hugs. He both prefers to kiss and be kissed on the forehead, since, in his opinion, it is the gentlest expression of love.

L = Little ones (How are they around children?)

The God is dead, house is on fire, Watari maneuvers between flames, trying to save the day. No, seriously, kids love L, he looks like a character from their favorite cartoon, but since he is not the most energetic person, to say the least, they quickly lose interest in him. The best solution for L is to babysit with someone who is more experienced and can guide him through this complicated process. Otherwise, he will make sure all dangerous objects are out of reach and leave children to themselves (if their age allows, of course).

Afraid to have kids of his own. Living in orphanage, he had no real functional family so a thought of parent's duty scares him.

M = Morning (How are mornings spent with them?)

· Morning routine depends on L’s messed up sleeping schedule:

If he went to bed last night, it means sleep deprivation finally got to him. Next 12 hours or so he will spend in blanket cocoon, tossing and slightly snuffling. No human power can wake him up, there’s no point in trying.

However if he stayed up all night, you will find out your kitchen turned into delicious sweet buffet. TV is still turned on with weird movie playing, but no sound is coming out of speakers. A tower of empty teacups is about to collapse. L is sitting in the chair, eating two cupcakes at once, lost in thoughts. He will offer you to join him in feast and raise his head a little, exposing his cheek for a kiss. It’s 5 am. Sun is rising and erasing last stars from the sky. Life is good.

N = Night (How are nights spent with them?)

·Nights out are rare, most of the times you stay inside, eating take-out and watching true crime documentaries. He still cannot decide whether they are dumb or interesting, so he keeps watching and changing his opinion with every new episode. After you go to bed, L will lay down next to you. Sometimes he will fall asleep, cuddling you and nuzzling into your neck. Sometimes he will get up and do God knows what.

O = Open (When would they start revealing things about themselves? Do they say everything all at once or wait a while to reveal things slowly?)

Well, he gives you fake name, always lies about his job, and holds back many details about his life… L wants to open up, he really does, but there’s no way he will do it. To every question he has a prepared half-true answer. Everything related to detective work is hidden behind seven seals and will be never presented to you unless you’re from FBI.

P = Patience (How easily angered are they?)

The embodiment of serenity, L never gets angry in classical sense. He may sulk, turn to sarcasm, shower your with stinging comments or, on the contrary, suddenly stop talking, but you’ll never see him red-faced, screaming, swearing right and left. He doesn’t have time to waste energy on such silly thing. It takes a lot to make him mad. After he calms down, L will continue make bitter remarks about thing that pissed him off for weeks.

Q = Quizzes (How much would they remember about you? Do they remember every little detail you mention in passing, or do they kind of forget everything?)

Not that attentive, really. You would expect him to remember a lot but he is always busy chasing exceptional criminals and his brain erases many details, both minor and major. For example, he can easily forget your Birthday and congratulate you both before and after it.

L never fails to remember anniversaries thanks to phone reminders. However, if he doesn’t check his phone that day, he will forget about them as well.

R = Remember (What is their favorite moment in your relationship?)

No matter how trite it may sound, his favorite moment is their first kiss. L clearly remembers his heart beating deafeningly loud and palms sweating like he’s kid who got in big trouble. There is no picture left in his memory, only feelings and crazy thoughts, terribly matted together. After it happened, L couldn’t even make a witty remark. Later that day he sat in front of overflowing cup of tea and slowly realized how little happiness he had felt before.

S = Security (How protective are they? How would they protect you? How would they like to be protected?)

Since he did everything to protect himself first and then, - just in case, - put a spying app on the phone of his loved, a satisfactory sense of security drowns out all of his possible fears. If anything happens, there’s already a rescue plan waiting to be executed.

T = Try (How much effort would they put into dates, anniversaries, gifts, everyday tasks?)

Let’s say he is trying, he is trying his best every day.

When it comes to presents, L will go for advice to Internet, rarely to Watari, and choose gift as close as possible to your interests. Dates are all on you though, because he feels so strange when he has to plan something for you two. On a subconscious level, he is afraid to ruin everything.

Tries even harder on anniversaries (if he remembers about them) and you either have the best day of your life, when he does whenever you want, or you are all alone wondering what the actual heck. In short, it’s all or nothing situation.

U = Ugly (What would be some bad habits of theirs?)

L is obviously manipulative, you can’t justify him. Some manipulation techniques are so integrated in his thinking and speech that it is impossible to get rid of them. Like if gaslighting was an Olympic sport, he would have all golden, silver, and bronze medals.

It seems like the opposite to the first point, but L also loves to be inappropriate straightforward. You know, moments when you understand what you feel but when another person vocalizes it or comments on it, you absolutely lose your shit? That’s what we talk about.

Quirkiness. I don’t really think this needs explanation. The totality of his strange habits can be a very repulsive sight to an ordinary person.

V = Vanity (How concerned are they with their looks?)

Watari is more concerned about his looks than he is. L never buys his clothes, his wardrobe is minimalist’s dream and consists of few pieces of monotone clothes, three pairs of shoes, and warm jacket for a fall/winter season. He doesn’t like brushing his hair, bites his nails to the blood, but absolutely adores hot bubble bathes. Looks do not matter when all people see is the letter L in Gothic font.

W = Whole (Would they feel incomplete without you?)

Depends on time spent in the relationship:

It’s stupid to expect L to suffer tremendously if you leave in first two months. When you are here he is a little bit happier, when you are not he is not that concerned. There’s still a high chance you’ll see him as he sees himself and leave, so why would he bother? It’s almost a painful expectation for another person to give up. If it ends, nothing will change, end of story.

Later L starts to catch himself worrying that someone finally climbed over the wall of his alienation, and it doesn’t seem like they are planning to leave any time soon. The closer they get, the scarier it is. If you suddenly cut all ties, he will be heartbroken, his face is emotionless like always but he is still hurt deep inside.

If anything happens a lot later in relationship, like year or two, L’s reaction will be calmer. He is grateful for everything they had and shared with him, for every moment of happiness, so he doesn’t feel like they can leave completely now. They will remain in his memory and his heart and because of it he won’t feel “incomplete”. A little bitter, but not hurt or emotionally torn apart.

If there’s any possibility that his loved one was killed by Kira, L will be furious. He will turn over every stone, use everything he can to avenge them and bring a peace to their memory.

X = Xtra (A random headcanon for them.)

It’s scary how much time L spends in frog-like position with back hunched. Therefore I feel like he will be ecstatic if someone offered him a good back massage to relax those tense muscles.

Overall, he loves random spa days when you two spend time in sauna, hot springs, yoga class etc. This probably would be his present on your first anniversary.

Some children were obsessed with dinosaurs, some were obsessed with superheroes, but L was obsessed with occultism, urban legends, haunted things, unexplained disappearances, and ghosts. His obsession died but its influence didn’t. Why else would he be so scarred and intrigued after hearing about Shinigami?

Y = Yuck (What are some things they wouldn’t like, either in general or in a partner?)

Just like Light, he wouldn’t stand blatant stupidity. Even if there’s something to compensate it, he will grow tired of dumb questions or over-all behavior. Oh, and he will give his comments on it whenever possible too.

Nosiness and bad boundaries. If he keeps some information to himself, it is not because of luck of trust. As a world’s best detective, he has many reasons to dodge personal questions to protect his work from interference and himself from possibility of getting killed.

He doesn’t like loud noises but can put up with it if needed with his collections of different ear plugs.

Z = Zzz (What is a sleep habit of theirs?)

It’s a common knowledge L’s sleeping schedule is non-existent. It has been like it since the day he took his first case and nothing has changed since. Watari keeps an eye on how many hours L stays awake and suggests him to rest from time to time but it rarely helps. Once L got so exhausted he straight up started hallucinating about having an adopted child and it scarred the hell out of him. After this incident he takes Watari’s advice more seriously.

L tried different versions of polyphase sleep at least once. Non of them worked, he ended up even more tired and frustrated, lost feeling in one of his arms, then broke a cup because of it.

Also L can sleep everywhere, no matter how uncomfortable he is. In the chair, leaning on the wall, on the floor – it all works for him unless there’s a loud noise in the room.

#death note #l lawliet #death note headcanons #l lawliet headcanons #L #death note headcanon #tosikowrites

201 notes · View notes

queenof-literature · 4 years

Text

Wolfie

Wild meets Wolfie. The second part of my series, Hero of Wild!

https://archiveofourown.org/series/1778263

AO3: queenofliterature

Link could always talk in his dreams.

He didn’t know why, it always came out as a painful gargled mess in real life. Once, one of the treasure hunters at Dueling Peaks Stable heard him trying to talk to himself and said he sounded like a demented toddler, causing both brothers to cackle. He kept trying, he could feel the words on the tip of his tongue and each time he thought for sure he could reach them. He never did. There weren’t always cruel words when he tried to talk, sometimes it was just scathing glares like the gossiping women in Hateno. Sometimes it was mothers dragging their children away from him as if he were a rabid dog. Eventually, Link never talked again. Not that he couldn’t take a joke, but he was the Hylian Champion. What would people say if they heard their champion talking like that? Not to mention that using his voice sent waves of fire through his throat. Enough people knew sign language, he could get by with a notebook if he had too. It was fine.

It wasn’t fine.

Watching all the other Links chat the long traveling days away hurt more than he expected. They were fun, and they understood him in ways others didn’t. They were Heroes of Courage too, they knew how hard the expectations could be. But Link, or, Wild now, wasn’t one of them. He had failed his Zelda, his Hyrule, and his friends. Why should he deserve new friends? But a selfish part of him wished he could talk to them. Wished he didn’t have to try and wave for their attention to add an abysmal amount to their conversation that had already left without him. It wasn’t their fault they could talk. It wasn’t fair to ask them to slow down so he could sign something half of them didn’t understand completely. Apparently, sign had changed over the centuries.

He wanted so badly to be able to talk. He had so much to say, so much that his Zelda had taught him and what he had learned on his adventure. Did they know how cooking hot-footed frogs bring out certain properties that are cancelled out when combined with other materials with hidden properties? He had done so many experiments with his cooking and he had found out so much! Oh well. He’d probably just annoy them anyway. That’s what happened when he talked in his dreams. People would make fun of his voice. Zelda would make fun of him for being a failure who can’t even talk properly. The other champions would blame him for his death, and when they didn’t they told him to shut up and do his job, in his dreams he never took his vow of silence. He thinks he had dreams, deep in the Shrine of Resurrection. His death on loop, his failures repeating in his mind. Sleeping leads to dreams.

He didn’t like dreams.

Twilight had the last watch tonight, although Wild tried to take over a watch every single night. Twilight tried to connect with Wild, he really did. He just didn’t know how. Focusing on everything was hard to do. If Wild wanted someone’s attention, he had to wave and hope they noticed. He would never go out of his way to gain someone’s attention, and he would never do more than a little wave. Sometimes Twilight would be able to catch it and ask who he wanted. Most of the time it was just little facts about his Hyrule. He was trying to be helpful and Twilight appreciated it. It was just hard to communicate with the shy boy. Especially when they were walking, when they all had to look out for monsters.

Twilight could see why his name was Wild. In that battle against the Lynel, he was an elegant force of chaos, breaking equipment, finding odd ways out of a situation, and seeing the battlefield in ways no one did. That was his element, the wild. Twilight wanted to get to know him in his environment, but it’s not like he wanted to chuck the boy into danger. He just wanted to see that spark again. Ever since Wild joined the group, the hollow spot he felt wasn’t so hollow. He never told anyone, he would sound insane, but Wild was meant to be here the entire time. Twilight just didn’t understand why Hylia waited so long.

Speaking of Wild, the boy was sleeping curled up in his thin bed roll away from the campfire at the edge of camp. He wanted to sleep further away, but everytime he tried Time told him to get at least within the bounds of camp, as to not be taken by a monster in the middle of the night. Wild huffed through his nose, but did as he was told.

Everything about him was a paradox. He was untamed, and yet he wasn’t disrespectful. His scarred face showed experience, but his age showed adolescence. His eyes were ancient and haunted, but also carefree and bright. Wild was a conundrum that Twilight and the others desperately wanted to solve.

Wild came with so many questions. Why couldn’t he talk? Was it physical with the scars on his neck? Mental, with the anxiety he clearly faced? Both? Neither? Did he just hate them? Twilight and the others had no idea.

Something about Wild made the wolf within him claw to get out. Not in an angry way, or a way that hurt. But in a way that the wolf wanted to help him, protect him, and ease his pain. He wanted Wild to talk to him and to trust him. Perhaps it was him being jealous of Warriors and Wind, and he shouldn’t pull Wild into his jealousy. No… it was deeper than that.

It felt like Wild was to Twilight as Twilight was to Time. Damn. He’d have to talk to the Old Man about this tomorrow.

“Link.”

“Link!”

Link’s eyes snapped open, only to be met with a lid of glass, surrounded by water. No no no. Not again. He didn’t die again. He didn’t. He didn’t fail again!

“Link, you failed me.” The voice was Zelda’s.

“No. Please Zelda this is a mistake. I’m coming. Let me out! Zelda I’m coming!” Link screamed, slamming his hands against the glass, hands turning red. But the glass didn’t budge.

“You left me, Link. You arrive one hundred years late to stop Calamity and you disappear two weeks later. I’m rebuilding a kingdom and you’re playing hero. You think your shiny new friends care? You’ll kill them, just like your last ones.” Zelda’s voice filled his ears no matter how hard Link covered them.

“No! Zelda I’ll come back! They need my help! The Master Sword told me!” Link pleaded.

“So now you feel your connection to the sword? I prayed for seventeen years. You don’t deserve the sword Link. You deserve nothing.” Water began to rise within the chamber. Link panicked and banged on the glass once more, but nothing changed. Nothing would ever change.

Twilight was twenty minutes into last watch when he heard soft noises coming from within camp. Twilight sighed, there were many restless nights with eigh-nine Heroes of Courage in one place. Whether it be nightmares, insomnia, the Heroes of Courage sometimes just had a hard time with sleep. But someone would sense it and wake up to comfort their friends. Twilight was close with them, but he didn’t want to step on any toes or cross any boundaries.

Hm. He should have heard rustling by now, one of the other heroes rising to comfort another one. But all he heard were the same soft noises becoming increasingly strained. Now that he thought about it, Wild hadn’t slept in the past few days they were together…

Twilight whipped around and looked at Wild from across the campfire. His scarred face was pulled into a pained expression, even from what little Twilight could see under the hood he insisted on keeping pulled up, even in sleep. His skin was pale and clammy, and his hands were scratching at his scars, turning them a bright red. Oh Hylia, Wild suffered from nightmares, and pretty terrible ones if they all looked like this. Perhaps he hadn’t slept at all since they were grouped together because of them. Wild seemed like the type to be embarrassed at needing help. They all were to an extent.

Twilight desperately thought of a solution. If it were the others, he could wake them up and give them reassurances or a gentle hug, depending on who it was. But with Wild, he had no ideas. Wild didn’t like to be touched at all so he couldn’t imagine he’d be very keen to affection after a horrifying nightmare, Twilight knew for a fact he slept with a knife and his slate nearby. But he couldn’t just leave the kid alone in a nightmare that would probably only escalate. Shit, what did he like? Maybe Twilight could throw a rock at him to wake him up? Hylia no that’s an awful idea. Shit he was so bad at this. Oh wait! Animals! Wild loves animals just like him! He could transform into a wolf and be gone by morning. It wasn’t ideal, Wild wouldn’t assume he spoke sign and therefore wouldn’t be able to talk, but he could at least offer physical comfort if Wild wanted.

He would have to be careful. The others knew about Wolfie, but if Twilight wasn’t there come morning, they would panic and wonder where he was and why he left them unprotected. And Wild hadn’t met Wolfie yet, and there were many savage animals in his Hyrule. This wasn’t his best idea, but it was the only one he had. Slowly, Twilight crept out of camp. Not far enough to leave the camp unwatched, but far enough from prying eyes who might happen to be awake. His transformation to Wolfie didn’t really hurt anymore, it was just the uncomfortable feeling of bones shifting. Once he was fully transformed, he silently trotted back to the edge of camp where Wild was.

What was the best way to go about this? He certainly did not want to get stabbed if Wild saw a giant wolf looming over him. So maybe a quick wet nose to the face then back up? Yes that seemed best. Twilight stalked forward, pressing his nose between the hands scratching at scars to stop him before he hurt himself further, then quickly backing away as Wild jolted awake with a small gasp and grabbed the rusted knife under his bedroll. Wide eyes gazed rapidly around for a threat. Wolfie shrunk down and whined, trying to make himself look as nonthreatening as possible.

Link gasped awake. A threat. His hand immediately went to his knife, desperately looking around to what was trying to kill him tonight. Yiga? Bokoblin? Moblin? After frantic eyes scanned the whole area, they landed on a hunched over wolf, stunning Li-no Wild. That’s right, he was in the camp with the other heroes. Keeping the knife in front of him, he eyed the wolf suspiciously. Wolves didn’t act like this, they would have bit him immediately since he was at the edge of camp. He knew he should have slept in a tree like always, but it seemed rude to be up high and more protected than his new group. The wolf, still having his head down slightly, approached him slowly. Not in the slow stalking motion that meant it was waiting for an opening. It almost seemed inviting. Wild wished he could talk to it. Was it hungry? He could spare some food but he didn’t want other wolves coming to this area. What in Hylia was going on?

Twilight continued to approach slowly, watching the knife wearily. Wild let him approach, though Twilight could tell he was nervous. Who wouldn’t be? At least Wild has some sort of self preservation. Soon, Twilight was at the knife. This was the moment of truth. He ducked under the knife and sniffed Wild’s hand, before nuzzling it slightly. Wild almost dropped the knife in shock, blue eyes wide. Twilight began to walk closer to Wild, before huffing and laying his head down in his lap. Looking up, he saw the clear shock on Wild’s face. Hesitant and shaking hands reached to pat his fur. Once he realized it was okay, Wild buried his hands into soft fur. Twilight wagged happily that his plan had worked, until he felt something wet on his head. It seemed the soothing motion only had Wild’s nightmare come back full force. Wolfie whined guiltily.

Wild attempted to tell him he was okay, but all that came out were rasps and words so broken Twilight couldn’t even begin to comprehend them. Twilight’s heart broke for the boy. It seemed he really wasn’t physically able to talk. Wild’s hands went to scratch at his neck and face again, but Wolfie intervened. He wanted the boy to cope however he could, but he didn’t want Wild to hurt himself. Wolfie sat up and nuzzled into Wild’s neck to prevent his hands from reaching it. Wild tried to say something but Wolfie couldn’t understand no matter how much he tried. Wild’s dam broke completely as he buried his face into Wolfie’s fur and cried, trying to use the fur to muffle any sounds he made. Twilight stayed the entire time, even as Wild’s small cries turned to hiccups and he got drowsy, Wolfie stayed.

His original plan was to leave as soon as Wild fell back asleep, but the teen had all but collapsed on him as they laid down. He didn’t have the heart to move and possibly wake the boy, leaving him alone to transform back into Twilight who he felt he couldn’t open up to yet. So Wolfie stayed. Time could make up an excuse for him in the morning, he was the only one who knew. He would see Wild draped on top of him and the tear tracks on the younger’s face and know what happened. As a wolf, he had better senses. If something came close to them, he would know. For now, he stayed by Wild’s side.

Time’s eye opened a crack, he’s always one of the earliest risers in the group. He sat up, back cracking slightly from sleeping on the ground before turning to say good morning to his protege on watch. Time froze when he realized his protege was nowhere to be found. He grabbed his Biggoron Sword and stood quickly. Twilight wouldn’t just leave them unguarded. Time’s eyes scanned the area, before landing on their newest addition draped on the wolf form of his protege. Time’s posture relaxed, although his abrupt rising woke some others in their party. Legend and Warriors had also awoken.

“Seems the new guy has finally met Wolfie.” Legend smirked at the sight before him, smirk only dropping when he noticed the tear tracks on Wild’s face.

“Seems like he had a rough night.” Warriors commented. “Leave it to our resident wolf to cheer him up.”

Wolfies’ eyes peeked open glaring slightly at the other heroes, almost daring them to wake the boy on top of him before dozing off once more. Time chuckled slightly. Seems his protege was a little protective over their newest member.

“Where’s Twilight?” Warriors asked, masking his concern. “He wouldn’t leave us to the monsters would he?”

“No.” Time shook his head. “Wolfie isn’t panicking so I’m sure he’s just checking the perimeter or scavenging. He wouldn’t leave us without Wolfie here to alert us.” Time resonated. He held back his relief when the others bought his excuse. Time smiled once again at Wolfie and Wild, not making too much noise and risk waking the others. Breakfast could wait a little while.

#wild #twilight #time #legend #Warriors #legend of zelda #LoZ #breath of the wild #linked universe #linkeduniverse #lu #wolfie #lu wolfie #queenof-literature story #QoL Story

103 notes · View notes

sebastianshaw · 4 years

Text

@starbucks-redcups Here is the “Toad in Tabletop Games I Like” post you requested! Also tagging @toadlingscentral and @brotherhoodofm and @awkward-snake-girl because Toad... @acaprioglino, you still like Toad? Okay, so I said I would pick a vampire clan or a werewolf/other wereanimal breed, or a DnD race class...but for Toad I am doing ALL of them because I immediately knew which I think he’d be for each. For a vampire, he is absolutely a Nosferatu. In the “Vampire: The Masquerade” setting, each clan of vampires has a curse, a weakness. For the Brujah, they enter Frenzy (a state of uncontrollable bloodthirsty rage) twice as easily as other clans. For the Lasombra, they do not appear in mirrors or photography, a fitting punishment for their pride, and more of a problem than it used to be in this modern age of cameras everywhere. For the Toreador, their same of beauty that makes them artists can also hypnotize them, making them stand still staring enraptured at whatever has captured their aesthetic appreciation...a big problem if the sun comes up or someone is attacking them. And Nosferatu....the poor Nosferatu are all so hideously deformed that they cannot ever mingle with humans, they must remain hidden so as to preserve the Masquerade (the system that keeps humans from knowing vampires exist and walk among them) No matter what a Nosferatu looked like before their Embrace (becoming a vampire) they become horrible in death, often unrecognizable as their former selves. Many look like Count Orlok in the movie that bears their clan name, but many others have a more “individual” appearence---all of them, however, are too hideous to ever pass as human, and even the other clans look at them with revulsion (especially the beauty-obsessed Toreador) So, like Toad, they’re outcasts for their appearance, both from humanity and often looked down on by other vampires, just like Toad is rejected both by humans and often by other mutants. Yet, just as Toad has been a valuable underling to Magneto, so too are the Nosferatu very valuable to other vampires. The fact that they have had to learn how to stay hidden has made them masters at going undetected (having the power of Obfuscate helps---it can make you invisible or ignored!) and have become spymasters and intel-gatherers without peer! When you need info, you go to the Nosferatu, and they always have it---for a price. Toad isn’t really an information-peddler at all in canon, but he is very tech-savvy, and that’s where I think he works as a Nos. In the digital age, Nosferatu have kept up very well with using computers and the internet, and some have become truly extraordinary hackers. Toad’s more of a machinery/inventor guy, but I could see Nos!Toad taking the Internet spymaster route instead. I could also see him using his inventing talents to make modern solutions to vampire problems---helping preserve the Masquerade, dealing with hunters, etc---and earning his value to other vampires that way. Nosferatus also have the power of Animalism, letting them control critters. A lot of them seem to prefer rats, but Toad can sometimes control or communicate with amphibians in canon depending who is writing, so I imagine Nos!Toad has a bunch of little frog and toad buddies that act as his eyes, ears, and living security systems. Finally, Nosferatu are super strong, posessing the power of Potence, and while Toad’s never been a real brawler, his kicks can definitely kill a man! Toad’s werewolf tribe would be a Bone Gnawer. Bone Gnawers are the “mutts” of werewolf society, the outcasts, the poor, the downtrodden, the ill-bred. Their human forms are often homeless bums or filthy runaways, their wolf forms look more like scrawny junkyard dogs, and other tribes look down on them, especially the aristocratic Silver Fangs. They get no respect and have to earn every scrap they get, but they’re innovative and clever since they have to rely on what little they have, and they’re tough as nails despite not being as big and strong as the other tribes. They’re tragic figures, but also smart, scrappy underdogs, just like Toad. Toad would also be a metis. See, a peculiarity of the wereanimals in “Werewolf: The Apocalpyse” is that they can’t mate with each other, they must mate with humans or animals in order to reproduce. If two werewolves mate, their offpsring will be sterile and deformed, and this is called a metis. As a note, the term “metis” is also unfortunately the name of a real-world Indigenuous Canadian ethnic group, and while I hope there is no connection (the werewolves use a lot of their own unique language that was invented for the game---crinos, ahroun, theurge, etc.---) this game company (White Wolf) has done shitty racist things before, so like...it’s a possibility. But like, regardless of what the NAME for such a creature is, that’s what Toad would be. Anyway, MOST werewolf tribes shun the metis, and it’s against their laws for Garou (werewolves) to mate with each other for the exact reason that it produces metis. A metis has to earn their place normally, and a lot of them spend their whole lives trying to do that. But the Bone Gnawers are different. They not only embrace their own metis, but they will adopt the metis from other tribes as their own, not blaming them for the sins of their parents or being what they are. But other tribes will still be nasty towards them. So, Toad has a place among his own people, but will still face persecution from others, which I think fits. Many metis and Bone Gnawers both often become angry and bitter because they’re fighting for the same righteous cause as other Garou (just as the Brotherhood wants to protect mutantkind, the werewolves want to protect Gaia) but get treated like dogshit, which I think also fits Toad. They keep fighting the good fight, but they’re often snarky and distrustful of others because they always expect to get kicked once they’re not useful. For a werebeast, I think he’d be a Ratkin. The Ratkin are wererats, and they’re my FAVES. Not just because I love rats, but because they’re honestly SO MUCH FUN. It’s kind of hard for me to describe if you’re not familiar with the setting, but in a world where a lot of the other creatures are all very formal and serious, the Ratkin are like...honestly, I could read their entire breedbook with Toad’s voice from the X-Men Evo cartoon and it would sound PERFECT; one of the rats in it talks about how a Stargazer tribe werewolf tried to impress him with a haiku about cherry blossosm, so the Ratkin recited half a limerick then hit the wolf on the nose with a stick and ran away. I love it, I love them. Like the Bone Gnawers (the only werewolf tribe they get along with) they’re scrappers and survivors who live on the fringes of society, using their brains to fight for a good cause even if they’re not as big and tough as others, and even if those others don’t appreciate them. There are different “Aspects” of Ratkin, basically different castes, and Toad would ABSOLUTELY be an engineer. Engineers use their shocking intelligence to salvage and devise ingenious devices from rubble and garbage to fight against the Wyrm and its servants (the Wyrm is like...the big bad evil spirit that all the wereanimals are fighting to save Gaia from, basically) Metis are a thing with wererats too, but the rats treat them equal, unlike werewolves. I would still have Toad be one, though, to keep his odd appearance; his rat form would probably be hairless, poor guy, and he’d probably have an unpleasant smell. As a note, Ratkin HATE humans, but the Ratkin metis will often have sympathy for humans who are downtrodden and outcast by other humans (which can make their fellow rats sneer at them) Finally, for DnD, his class would be either a Rogue or an Artificer. A Rogue is one of the original classic DnD classes, they’re sneaky cunning thief-types who live by their wits and rely on skills and stealth and cunning and trickery instead of brute force. They pick locks and pick pockets, and I think they’d be a great fit for X-men Evolution Toad specifically. They can be very acrobatic, and are great at avoiding danger, which also fits for Toad’s leaping abilities and how he can be cowardly ( speaking of that, the Ratkin, while ultimately willing to die for Gaia if they must, would definitely always prefer to live another day if they can, rather than die a noble death if they don’t have to) So you could totally go with Toad as a Rogue, someone who has been cast out by society and thus has become a thief and a scoundrel to survive. But the Artificer, a new class, works even better when you consider Toad’s mechanical genius. Artificers, like the Ratkin Engineers, merge science with the supernatural. They’re inventors extraordinaire who unlock the magic in everyday objects, and channel arcane power with tools and tinkering! For his race, either a Grung or a Kobold. The Grung are little frog-people. They’re agile, they’re amphibious, they jump really good, and their skin secretes a substance that is harmless to them but poisonous to other creatures. By using a small amount of this poison, they can mentally enslave other creatures, and depending on the writer (Toad’s powers fluctuate around a lot due to his unstable genetic structure, as I’m sure you know) Toad can also secrete chemicals from his tongue and fingertips that allow him to influence, manipulate, and control the minds of others to a limited extent, so there’s that similarity. Different colored grungs have different castes/roles in their society, and I think Toad would be a green or blue. Green grungs are the tribe's warriors, hunters, and laborers, and blue grungs work as artisans and in other domestic roles. Green because, even though he’s not the bravest, he is often used as a grunt or canon fodder in fights by the Brotherhood, and blue because “artisan” could also cover being an inventor. Kobolds are little lizard-people who often serve dragons as the dragon’s minions (and Toad is usually in the minion role) and are noted for their skill at building traps and preparing ambushes, which I think Toad’s engineering skills would make him good at, plus I think he’d far prefer trapping an enemy than having to fight them. Like Toad, Kobolds are often dismissed as cowardly, foolish, and weak by others, but actually they’re clever and can be quite aggressive, as is the case with Toad too. I hope you enjoyed this and that at least some of it was accurate/fitting!

#toad #mortimer toynbee #todd tolansky #out of shirt

24 notes · View notes

rawliverandcigarettes · 3 years

Note

☀️🐟 💗 for shlee? i think he's cute

Thank you so much for asking!!

☀️ How well does your OC take care of themself? Do they tend to put others before their own wellbeing and if so how often? What is their favourite way to pamper themself?

Shlee is a *disaster* when it comes to taking good care of himself. For his defense, this is partially due to the lack of proper guidance as everyone in his close circles is a disaster at taking care of themselves in various, special ways. It's also due to his complete lack of salarian upbringing and having a parent that doesn't really go anywhere beyond the bare minimum of making sure the alien baby doesn't crumble and die --anything skincare-related is an approximation, and his food intake is only somewhat appropriate for salarian metabolism and its needs. So alone, this deteriorates even further: undersleeping or oversleeping, garbage food habits, a propensity for addictive behaviors and solving his problems with immediate solutions that might (and will) lead to long-term problems. He does drink water/hydrate his skin aaalmost as much as he should, so yay Shlee, one correct thing, congrats.

He also has a tendency to show that he cares/that he's invested by putting himself in unsustainable situations, and is afraid that pushing back or putting himself first might get him rejected, either professionnaly or with personal matters. Still: he does hold a grudge that he's being put into this situation, even by his own volition, and might snap about it at some point in the future.

I think Shlee is driven towards aesthetic things, so he will prepare himself fancier teas/cocktails based on how pretty they look rather than how they taste, and I think that's his best approximation of "taking care of himself".

🐟 What was your OC like as a baby? What were they like as a child? A teenager? An adult? How do you think they’ll develop ten years into their future? Twenty years? Will they live to old age?

Halfway Home will cover most of that in greater details, but Shlee changes *a lot*.

As a baby, he's very sick all the time and quite needy because of it, but will bite you if you do something he doesn't like. Very instinctive, because his body is busy fighting off a generalized poisoning that stifle his growth.

As a child, he's very obsessive about certain topics, sometimes unpredictible, and starts to become shy, anxious and closed off after a certain event. Can still be a bit much, and cares a lot about exactitude, which is very aggravating for his asari sister who doesn't remember things as well as him.

As a teenager, he learns to become agreeable, and morph his awkward, antisocial behavior into constant damage control. He tries to project reason and obedience above all, but secretely craves freedom and desecration. Still capable of audacity and pettiness, but will come off as more passive agressive at this point.

Then he becomes... barely an adult, more like a late teenager, when a lot of things in him explode. His anxiousness morphes into nervous immediacy, his prudence blows up into recklessness, and a lot of anger erupt and overflow, being a driving force of who and what he becomes. Shlee then becomes attached to justice and belonging, longs for more control and more power, but overcompensates this behavior with a tendency to punish himself in various ways as he discovers more and more elements about the circumstances of his birth and the realities of the world he lives in.

And I'm not going to spoil anything, but Shlee's life is going to be and remain a constant battle of explosion and collapse, of tolerating the consequences of his actions upon the world while not completely giving up on himself too. It's not going to be easy! He will find sporadic moments of peace, but healing is a complicated, messy path, and there are scars that never leave.

💗 Ramble a bit about this character!

I love him. ;_; No but really, Shlee is a hot mess that took me a while to get right. I think he's there now. He used to be biotic! This still matters to the plot now (biotic-ness or lackthereof), but he's no longer a biotic and I think this made the character, because he had to find strength elsewhere. This decision really sharpened his tongue and allowed him to become much more bold, in a way that grants him insane power sometimes, and also puts him in awful situations in others. His psyche is full of complicated things interplaying each other, but I think that his character journey makes sense now, and I'm happyyyy.

Anyway, he makes me laugh and cry, and I'm so fucking sorry I dumped all of my garbage unto this poor space frog that never asked for any of this. Thank you Shlee for dealing with the garbage!!!

Ask me about my OCs!

#shlee #halfway home #asks

2 notes · View notes

najatheangel · 3 years

Text

Date with Idol Ship⛄️🤍

Hiii! I hope it's not too soon to request another ship. May I request a date with an idol ship with WayV please? I'm not sure how much info you remember from the last ship, but I'm gonna add new stuff, so you won't have to read the same info. I'm good at giving advice and helping people with their problems. I'm also patient, understanding, considerate and carefree. When my friends get into an argument, I don't pick sides. I listen to both sides and try to come up with a solution. During a bad situation, I try to lighten up the mood with some jokes. [...]

@wjnterchild Welcome back sweetie of course not your absolutely alright! I love doing these so I’m glad to do another request for you. Alrighty girly your ship is finally here!✨✨

The member your going on a date with is...Xiaojun

His outfit for the date:

Your outfit for the date:

How it started: 5 years ago you and Xiaojun went to the same high school, lived in the same neighborhood and even your families knew each other. He was always the first one to approach you at your front door offering to take you to school. People at school would even tease you two about becoming a couple especially when you played the prince and princess at the school play the princess and the frog.

You both had your passion and the love of arts so it was bound to happen, but what you both didn’t expect was a 5 sec kiss scene where he transforms at the end back as a prince. You both were nervous hoping this doesn’t change anything between your friendship and top it off it was both of your first kiss like EVER. This was only the beginning of your love for each other blossoming.

After you both graduated high school, you started going your separate ways going to different universities promising each other to stay in contact, but that didn’t last too long. You knew Xiaojun was majoring in music, but you didn’t know that he was planning on becoming an idol.

You saw him debut with his group Wayv for the first time and you wanted to get mad at him for not telling you, but then you heard him sing regular. Instantly you grabbed the remote to pause the tv and remembered why you fell for him in the first place. His singing made you feel all kinds of emotions you’ve never felt before. Happiness, sadness, anger and strongest emotion of them all love. Your sister noticed how long you were staring at the handsome man on tv and all of a sudden wanted to check on you.

Your Sister: Sis you must really miss Xiaojun huh? Why don’t you just call him? Plops herself on the couch leaning on your shoulder.

Y/N: I wish I could. His number changed, we haven’t talked to each other since we’ve graduated and plus, what would I even say to him? You sighed in frustration and pouted watching the tv as he smiles at the other idols.

Your sister: Well we’re actually not that far from their dorms. Apparently they go to the same grocery store as us! That’s your best chance at bumping into him.

Y/N: Ehh I don't know sis, this seems very odd. He might think I’m stalking him or- Your sister all of a sudden drags you off the couch and pushes you out the door.

Your sister: Enough of your fussing! Just trust me, your bound to see him. Just at least take a walk around the store and see if he’ll be down there. She looks the door window giving you a thumbs up.

This was your last shot at trying to reunite with him. A part of you was nervous not knowing what to say once you see him and another part of you wanted to be confident hoping for the best. Just like your sister told you you were walking down the streets of Seoul admiring the scenery.

You notice it starts to sprinkle rain at first, but then it starts pouring like a waterfall. You run finding the closest shelter trying to protect yourself from getting sick. You are also not a big fan of thunder storms so you curled up in a ball having trouble looking up. All of a sudden, you feel a pair of arms wrapping around you from the thunderstorms.

This strange warm feeling was giving you deja vu. You didn’t dare open your eyes until the mysterious figure holding you said your name. That’s when you slowly opened your eyes looking up with your sparkling eyes.

Y/N: X-Xiaojun? Is that really you?

Xiaojun: Long time no see y/n. You must be very scared why don’t you come with me where it’s more safe. Smiles at you warmly waiting for your answer.

Y/N: As a matter of fact I do. We have a lot of catching up to do mister. Stands up following him smiling back.

The Date Spots: SM Cafe/Han River

Xiaojun wanted to make it up to you after those 3 years of not telling you about his now public life as an idol. He wrapped his jacket around you warming you up and sat you down next to the SM album collections.

He ordered you two large hot chocolates with whip cream and chocolate drizzle. To top it all of he ordered your favorite set of vanilla cupcakes custom just with your name on it. He was clasping his hands together hoping to get a positive reaction out of you which worked.

The both of you clicked back right away like it was the good all days talking about each others families, careers, friends and to get more personal love lifes.

Xiaojun: So...do you have a boyfriend?

Y/N: Giggles sipping your hot chocolate. No, not yet a least. What about you? There’s a lot of pretty girls in the industry. Have you found the one yet?

Xiaojun: That may be true, but I already have someone I like. Looks down smiling as he eats his cupcake hoping you would understand where he’s hinting at.

Y/N: O-oh right. Of course that was bound to happen. You look disappointed and was about to pack your stuff and go back home. Xiaojun stops you by standing in front of your gently grasping your shoulders.

Xiaojun: Wait. Can you stay with me a little longer? I want to give you a tour around my company if that’s okay. He looks at you with infamous cute puppy dog eyes.

Y/N: Hmm alright, since you’ve asked with so cutely I don’t see why not.

Xiaojun shows you all the floors of the SM company from the studio to the private movie theater sharing you everything about his life being a member of Way v. He even buys you souvenirs from the store of your favorite groups such as Shinee, Girls Generation, F(x), etc...

The sun starts setting down after hours of playing around with Xiaojun at the Sm company. Just like old times you guys decided to take a trip to Han River where you first met as teenagers on the winter day.

Winter was your favorite season and apart of that reason was because Xiaojun saved you from that rough patch where you felt lost and unsure of what direction you wanted to take in life. Lucky for you Xiaojun came around the right time to encourage you to keep going.

While you were lost in your thoughts all of a sudden you felt his hand griping on yours smiling down at you. He out of no where kisses you on the check and proceedes to say.

Xiaojun: Hey you got your head in the clouds again. What are you thinking about?? Notices you staring at him for that suprise attack.

Y/N: W-why did you do that? Don’t you have someone you already like?? Ends up sitting your self down on the bench blushing like crazy.

Xiaojun: Ahhh, I thought I made it so obvious. Ruffles his hair out of frustration at your oblivious behavior. Y/N...you remember when you played the princess and I played the prince in that school play?

Y/N: Gulps. Yeah and what about it?

Xiaojun: Ever since that day after that kiss, I couldn’t stop thinking about it. For years I have been trying plan the perfect way to tell you my feelings before training to become an idol, but it’s like there’s always some dumb misunderstanding. So now that the sun is setting down and the stars are coming up...I want to say simply that I love you and I hope you accept me not just as your friend.

There’s a slight pause between you two staring at each other unsure what to do next, but a spark lights within you to confess right back.

Y/N: Me too Xiaojun. Ever since that day, I just knew that I wanted to be with you as your special someone. I just didn’t want to stop you from achieving your dreams or stealing you away from anyone. No matter what I just wished nothing, but the best for you.

You both slowly lean in pulling each other closer and then boom...your lips are crashing into each other. It was not too slow, but not too fast either just the perfect pace. In both of your minds you thought this was simply worth 3 years of waiting.

The Aftermath: After a long day of following Xiaojun all day it was time to walk back home. You insisted on taking a cab back home, but of course Xiaojun was not going to let that happen. Him being the sweetheart and best boyfriend he is, he’s letting you ride with him in his personal van driver. At least your alone this time in the back seat it can’t be helped Xiaojun sometimes need to have security with him in case saesangs start following him.

The both of you cuddle in the back seat giggling having the time of your lives wishing you can stay with him much longer. Your face suddenly changes to sadness when you realize that this will be the last real you will have with Xiaojun. You have different schedules and paths in life that it’ll be to hard to match.

Y/N: Xiaojun, are you really sure you want to make this work? I mean it’s going to be hard to keep up long distance. Plus your going to be promoting in China most of the time.

He turns looking at you and lifts your chin to face him.

Xiaojun: I’ve never been so sure about something in my entire life. Y/N I love you too much to let you disappear again. It might be difficult, but I will all the time in the world to be with you while still achieving my dream singing.

Y/N: Aren’t you in the slightest bit scared of what will happen?

Xiaojun: Now out of all the years you’ve known me, you know I would never be scared. I might be lonely and a bit sad at times, but I know it’ll all be worth the wait to see you again and again.

You arrive at the front door of your apartment and he was opening the car door for you making sure you stepped out the car safely.

Before you were off your way walking inside your home, you turned around giving Xiaojun one last look and said.

Y/N: Xiaojun I had so much fun today. It was just like old times and I want to cherish this moment forever. You you his jacket towards you to look him in the eyes smiling innocently.

Xiaojun: Same for me. W-we should end the night off with a good night kiss. Laughs at his embarrassing voice crack and then leans in attempting for one last kiss.

You hear your sister slamming the door open and the moment has been ruined by your sister interrupting.

Your sister: Welcome back home- oh long time no see Xiaojunnie.

Y/N: Sis!! Really now.

For the rest for the night you finish off sharing one last group hug before Xiaojun was on his way back to the dorms. It was a night to remember and a night that you’ll never ever forget. He promised you next time he’ll get that good night kiss.

Thanks so much darling for requesting again and I hope this ship somewhat made your day/night. 🤍🤍

#wjnterchild⛄️#submission #kpop ships #idol date ships #idol date ship #date with idol ship #date with idol #wayv ships #Wayv ship #wayv #xiaojun

2 notes · View notes