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somehowmags · 9 months

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i NEED to grip and shake you like a salt and pepper shaker tumblr user somehowmags cause im so insane about rook i need to talk about him I MISS HIM SO MUCH RHAHSHSGSGDYSHSHAHSHH but this cookie hits so im not gonna talk about him now. also im really hyped for the possibility of a book 8 wherein there's a grim overblot and they explore yuu's arc and their role in twisted wonderland, their backstory, mickeys involvement, and what lies ahead for them. i just can't grasp that twisted wonderland might end after book 7 because you can't do that to me. you can't end my mental illness :/ drop more lore like it's a pumpkin in MY enclosure. i intended for my twst mc to be based off alice liddell in American McGee's Alice but canon yuu takes such a big backseat in the overall story i have to think my thunk so much about my own mc's respective role in the lore and ongoing story and it hurts. the curse of needing to have a girlboss mc

WAUBLBLGLGLBLBGLGBL <- me being shaken like a salt and pepper shaker

HONESTLY I DON'T THINK THEY'LL END IT AFTER BOOK 7!!! they've set up rsa and that upcoming tournament between the two schools already, and we still don't know what the monster in the beginning that looks like grim is, and we still don't know what mickey's deal is! (everytime i remember that mickey mouse is in this game i have to sit down and put my head in my hands for a lil bit. what the fuck man. it feels more jarring than him being in kingdom hearts for some reason asdkljhjalsdf) storywise, there's still a lot to get to! also, i get the feeling that they'll want to show the twst versions of the disney princesses as well which i personally would be very excited to see and also maybe even the fourth year students!

and on the cynical side of things...gacha games are really popular right now, and i think disney will milk the cash cow for all its worth for as long as they can. sure, twst isn't as popular as, like, genshin impact, but its still fairly popular in its own right, and im sure theyre making a pretty penny off of it. and what keeps people coming back is story and character. (granted, im sure it would get more popular and therefore more profitable if they'd just fucking release it in more regions but. well. im not being paid to advise disney on shit lmao. if i was we would already be able to buy those 60 dollar jumbo plushies in the us and i would have a gazillion of them) but also story heavy mobile games tend to run for a long time anyways- like, fire emblem heroes came out in 2017 (holy shit that came out in 2017????) and it's STILL releasing its story. basically do not underestimate corporate greed

but in the interest of not being a total hater i also trust in yana toboso's writing here. for the problems that i have with her (and by problems i mean whatever criticisms i had from the last time i read black butler in like 2018 aklsjdffhalksdhldfhk) she is a good writer and black butler has been continually published since. holy shit i just checked wikipedia its literally been published since 2006 LMAO THAT'S WILD so i don't think the story will be running out for a while!

#asks #twst #also YES to your mc #we need more girlboss mcs. im sick to death of prettyboys. i want WOMEN #although honestly i really like the way yuu is written in canon #its like the y*kuza (censored to not go into tags) (games not real ass people) thing where you don't get many choices #so every choice you do have is one that yuu would make #and those choices paint a very interesting portrait KLJASDHLKASHFD #yuu is a little weirdo too i like them #i always get weirdly attached to invisible/silent protagonists i love them sm

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pyrowitchery · 2 years

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Baneful Work

Baneful Magic and Methods

How to Break through Baneful Magic

Things to Remember

Hex vs Curse

Nobody Came Curse

Shaker Jar Curse

Hexing

Jar of Consequences Hex

List of Items to Use

Baneful Magic Ingredients

Crystals for Cursing

Return to Sender

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fanimesenseiwrites · 3 years

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Things the MC would bring back to their demon bois from the mortal realm:

Lucifer:

MC goes to second hand stores and vintage shops always on the look out for vinyl records that they think Lucifer would like.

Most of the time they try and bring back stuff he'd actually like, such as Tchaikovsky or Vivaldi

Once, they brought back Stravinsky's Firebird Suite and Lucifer wouldn't stop kissing them (once they were in the privacy of his room of course)

Sometimes the MC will bring back more modern music just because it makes them think of him

"I dunno, I just listen to Hozier and think of you"

Lucifer doesn't like all the modern music they bring back but he appreciates the sentiment just the same

Then there's the gag gifts...

Any kind of music that has a reference to the devil or Satan or hell is fair game

These gifts usually elicit an eye roll from the eldest brother but he keeps them all the same

This is why Lucifer owns a copy of "The Devil Went Down To Georgia"

So when MC brings back a copy of Giuseppe Tartini's Violin Sonata in G minor, they're a little surprised at Lucifer's delighted reaction

"You know, I was the one who visited Tartini in his dreams."

MC's mind = blown.

"Also, this copy is cursed. I know you know how much I enjoy cursed vinyls."

"I- wait... What?!"

MC is very upset that they had a cursed vinyl in their possession this whole time

Mammon:

This boy loves stuff, and he loves MC, so he's gonna love any gift really

But MC knows he loves treasure and jewels and as much as they'd love to just bring him back nice watches and jewelery...

MONEY IS A THING, AND MC IS NOT MADE OF IT.

So MC settles for semi-precious stones instead

They always find fun and beautiful stones at museums and those metaphysical stores and they always pick out one that reminds them of Mammon

They're really nervous when they give him his first gift

"Hey, I got this for you and I know it's not fancy or expensive but I saw it and thought of you and I just wanted you to have it."

Mammon will love them until they die. He is really just so touched that MC thought of him. He'll try and play it cool though

He totally fails. MC won't tell him that though

MC brings him Lapis Lazuli and tells him it reminded them of his eyes and Mammon is now a puddle of lovesick goo on the floor

Mammon puts more shelves in his room dedicated to all the gifts MC gives him

One time MC brings him back some fool's gold in a teeny little jar on a chain, so that he can wear it

"Fool's gold? Why cuz I'm a fool?" Mammon asks with a roll of his eyes.

"What? No, cuz I'm a fool for you."

Mammon only love MC until they die? WRONG.

He's gonna love them forever now

He was gonna do that anyways

Leviathan:

C'mon, this boy is easy. Anime/manga stuff and TSL. Need I say more?

At first he'll be suspicious of MC wanting to give him gifts, but once they've convinced him that they're doing it out of the kindness of their heart he's really touched

The first thing the MC brings him is a pen with a little Ruri-Chan on the end of it

"I know it's not much, but I just happened to see it and I knew you'd like it"

Like it??????

HE LOVES IT! HE'S OVER THE GODDAMM MOON.

He's never seen anything like this in the Devildom and he doesn't think about the small stuff usually because he's too busy trying to get the big collectors edition items. So he actually really loves this.

MC continues to bring him cute small stuff like buttons and keychains and Levi loves them all.

His favorite item(s) that MC brought him is a pair of Lord of Shadows and Henry BFF enamel pins

He definitely tackle hugged MC when he got them

He gives the Lord of Shadows pin back to MC so they can each have one and show off their BFF status with them

Satan:

MC loves going to second-hand bookstores to shop for Satan.

Satan also appreciates new books, but there's something special about how his face lights up when he finds something old or rare. Anything with a little bit of history to it.

Of course, finding rare books for not a lot of money is a rare event in itself

So a safe bet is to bring Satan non-fiction, the boy loves to learn

But he really loves it when MC puts thought into finding fiction books that he would like

"I just really feel like you'd like Dean Koontz so I brought you one of my favorites by him."

Satan loves those gifts the most because he can talk to MC about the books afterwards

Satan's absolute favourite gift is a leather bound copy of Arabian Nights though

"I was thinking we could read this one together"

"Like you read it to me and pretend to be Scheherazade?" Satan suggests.

MC is flustered at the connotation of the suggestion but agrees anyways

The time they spend together reading that story will forever be one of Satan's favorite memories

Asmodeus:

He's a little harder to shop for than the MC had originally imagined

They tried bringing him make-up and skin care, which Asmo always graciously accepted, but he never seemed super excited about the gifts

But what else is to be expected from the guy who already uses only the best products?

MC suddenly gets an idea when they send Asmo a selfie of them at the park

- OMG! You're so cute! And the background is pretty too!-

MC starts dressing up and going to nice and beautiful places just with the intention of taking pictures

Botanical Gardens, museums, downtown skylines, anything that would make for a good picture

MC goes full on aesthetic art hoe just for Asmo

Only the best pictures get sent to Asmo

Asmo is LIVING for the looks their MC is serving up

- You are absolutely STUNNING! I'm in awe at these AMAZING pictures-

MC makes a scrapbook of the best pictures to give to Asmo the next time they see him

Asmo loves it and keeps it on display in his room always

Also, Asmo definitely makes MC their personal photographer after seeing the wonderful shots they took

Beelzebub:

Obviously, the boy loves food. He's always down to try new snacks from the mortal realm.

But MC wonders if there's something better that they could bring him

One day MC is at GNC for supplements for themself when they notice the workout supplements and get an idea

They grab some fun flavored protein powder and some BCAAs and a really nice shaker bottle just for Beel

Beel is actually really excited to get these gifts!

The Devildom doesn't have fun flavors of protein powder and the shaker bottle is such a great idea!

MC always brings new flavors of protein back for Beel, doing their best to find the weirdest flavors for him to try

Beel's favorite is definitely Birthday Cake.

MC starts bringing him new stuff to try too, protein bars, recovery supplements, collagen, and superfoods shakes

Beel tries everything and tells MC what their favorites are

"I love the BCAAs, I just wish the Devildom had them..." *sad Beel noises*

MC may or may not talk to Diavolo about researching BCAAs and getting them produced and sold in the Devildom

The supplements MC brings actually help Beel with his workouts and to control his hunger (a little)

Beel actually gets hotter??? Who knew that was possible???

MC definitely takes advantage of Beel's new 8-pack 😏😏😏

Belphegor:

What do you get the boy who only wants to sleep?

MC has gotten him stuffed animals and blankets and even a couple of nice pillows, but nothing seems to excite him

... but maybe that's just his personality??

It's not until MC accidentally leaves a sweater in the Devildom, that they figure it out

- You left your sweater down here- Belphie texts MC.

- Oh no, I'll just get when I come to visit y'all again-

- That's fine. I like having something that smells like you-

And the light bulb went off in MC's head.

Every time MC goes to visit they leave a shirt or sweater behind for Belphie, so that he can have something that smells like them.

Belphie loves how MC smells, its like a sweet dream all the time. It helps him sleep better when they're gone.

Belphie starts to complain when MC is gone longer than the item they left smells like them

(Which is every time)

So MC will start leaving Belphie more than one item, packing them in airtight bags so he can use them one after another until they return

Belphie can and will fight anyone who tries to take MC's clothing

"Mammon, you have two seconds to put that sweater back or I will kill you."

And Lucifer probably won't stop him

Diavolo:

He's honestly the easiest to please.

He's so fascinated with any thing that humans do that he'll enjoy any gift from the human world.

MC's first gift to him is a rubber duck.

"The duck is wearing a crown so it made me think of you and I just thought it was cute."

"I love it! What's its purpose?"

"Uh... to float around in the bathtub with you and look cute?"

"Isn't that what you're for?"

Diavolo loves the rubber duck so much it gets his own silk pillow to rest on when it's not taking a bath with Diavolo.

MC brings him cute pens, and keychains sometimes bottles of wine if the bottle is cute.

"The bottle is shaped like a cat! Isn't that delightful?!"

MC's proudest moment was when they found a full and intact tea set at the thrift store

Diavolo immediately fell in love with it.

He insists on only using that set when having tea with MC

But his favorite gift will always be the rubber duck.

Barbatos:

He'll insist that he doesn't need any gifts but that won't stop the MC.

MC is with him in the kitchen in the Demon Lord's Palace when they get an idea.

KITCHEN TOYS.

Barbatos works so hard, he deserves some things to make his life easier and liven up the bland kitchen

MC's first gift is a vegetable spiralizer.

"You use it to turn zucchini and squash and the like into noodles so that you can do fun stuff with vegetables!"

Barbatos accepts it graciously, but he'll probably never use it.

MC brings him spices from the mortal realm and Barbatos actually really loves those.

When MC brings him a food processor, he offers to cook for them right then and there

Despite all the weird gadgets MC ends up bringing him, and there are plenty out there, Barbatos's favorite is a ladle that looks like a stegosaurus.

It's far more whimsical than anything he would've ever picked out, and he'll never use it, but only because he's afraid of ruining it, not because he doesn't love it.

At some point, Barbatos does ask MC to stop bringing him kitchen gadgets

"Why? Do you not like them?" MC asks with a pout.

"I appreciate all of them, but I have everything I need when you're in the kitchen with me."

If MC wasn't already in love with him they are now

Smooth bastard just doesn't want anymore shit in his kitchen

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cinnamonbunsenburner · 3 years

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A Witchy Situation *Oikawa Tooru x Witch! Reader University AU*

You were panicking. The cauldron you had ordered online was not going to make it for the full moon tomorrow night. Frustrated, you tossed your phone to the bed and threw yourself to the ground dramatically, throwing a tantrum like a kid.

‘It’s the moon’s fault, gods damn it! All this energy is making me fucking crazy and now this shitty cauldron wouldn’t make it for my ritual to rid myself off the bad energies this past month!!’, you vented in your mind.

You continued to weakly pound your fists on your bedroom floor when you suddenly heard the soft pitter patter of the rain.

“RAIN. WHERE ARE MY JARS?!”, you exclaimed out loud. You were internally thankful that your boyfriend wasn’t home because you cannot for the life of you stutter out a believable explanation on why you were gonna place several mason jars and bowls on your patio. It was enough that you convinced Oikawa that rain water was ‘healthier’ for your indoor plants *it wasn’t* rather than tap water.

You gathered some of your jars, which were empty because you recently performed a protection ritual in your shared apartment, and placed them carefully on the floor of your patio to catch some rain water that you were going to charge under the full moon tomorrow night.

As you went back inside, you decided to light some incense to smoke cleanse the apartment and your used tools. You spread them out on the living room floor, carefully putting some crystals to cleanse in a bowl that’s full of salt and the non-soluble ones in a bowl full of the last of your rain water.

‘It feels to stuffy in here ugh,’ you thought, grimacing as it might influence your behaviour even more. Looking at the clock, you still had about two hours before your boyfriend comes home from practice. You opened the windows and began lighting your incense with the intent of cleansing all the negative energy that roamed around. You started with your used tools and moved to the rest of the apartment. As you went into the kitchen you couldn’t help but stare at the several jars of herbs and spices decorated .. everywhere.

When you were beginning your craft *which was also the time when you and your boyfriend moved in together*, you suddenly felt the need to stack up on some herbs with different magickal properties despite not doing spells yet. Then came the hoarding of jars, crystals, incense, and of course, candles. But it was mainly herbs that you kept on buying. It wasn’t until Oikawa pointed out that you were wasting money when you could plant your own. And that was the birth of your obsession with plants.

Two years later, your mini herb garden influenced your hot as fuck boyfriend to also grow his flower and vine garden as well. It was the happiest day of your life when Oikawa brought home three different kinds of flowers and a vine of some sort, saying that you two are going to breath the freshest air with the amount of plants that you have. And you couldn't wish for something more amazing than that.

‘We’re plant parents y/n! Oh! We should name all of them.’

‘They already have names Tooru-’

‘Nonsense! Those are LABELS, y/n-chan. Our plants need more respect and freedom of expression!’

You eventually gave in and now all of the pots of all the plants have names. Yes, your idiotically endearing boyfriend memorised their names like the back of his hand.

You smiled fondly and shook your head. Sometimes you don’t know if Tooru’s secretly a green witch or something with the way he cares for each of the plants. But nevertheless, you loved it. You loved him.

‘Damn it, I’m simping so hard again. That's his job, not mine! Ugh I love my idiot so much’, you face palmed your most probably red face.

You finished cleansing the entire apartment and put out the incense, heading towards the bathroom for a shower.

---

You were just finishing up with your night skin care routine *charged with a beauty sigil and positive intent, obviously* when you heard your front door open.

“Behold, your prince has come bearing food!”, Oikawa’s voice echoed loudly. It was a saturday so it was Tooru’s turn to buy dinner. It was something you guys talked about.

You two would always take turns in either buying or making dinner. Even if there was a misunderstanding between the two of you, that ‘treaty’ as Oikawa had put it, would always be followed. One time, there was a particularly large fight between the both of you *you can’t remember anything from it anymore but you two had definitely learned from it * that provoked the both of you to raise your voices at one another.

You both soon realise your toxic attitude in avoiding problems and bottling it up, letting it burst at the second it was too much to set aside. From then on, no matter how small the issue is in your personal lives, you talk it out while eating dinner. Sure, it might cause a slight disagreement but you two actually preferred it that way rather than letting it boil further into a huge melting pot that may risk a permanent tear in your relationship *yes, you two had opened up about this. And yes, Oikawa is indeed an ugly crier. But hey, at least your problems are solved sooner than later.*

You froze as you remembered that you had accidentally left your witchy stuff out in the open. You weren't particularly closeted but you weren't ready to tell your boyfriend. You were sure though that he already had a hunch once you hoarded some stuff that you normally didn’t pay attention to. And with his knowledge of extraterrestrials and the unknown, it’s going to shock you if he still doesn't suspect you of being a witch.

You quickly put down your brush and rushed to meet your now suspiciously quiet boyfriend. You found him crouched on the floor poking at the crystals in your salt bowl while holding your wand in the other hand.

“Tooru! You’re home! ahahaha, that’s nothing to be,” you closed off your book of witchcraft that was bearing a chapter introduction to blood magick. “thought about too much,” you said nervously, tucking your arms behind you as you stared off to the side. He looked up at you while his eyebrows were furrowed in confusion.

“..One of your crystals are kinda goopy and kinda melting there in the water y/n-chan,” Oikawa pointed at your bowl full of rain water.

“Eh?”, you stared back at him.

It was an awkward silence after a few moments, neither knew how to react. He blinked at you.

And you blinked back at him.

...

“...crap, my Selenite.”

“Uh.. yeah. It’s kinda dissolving so I think you should take it out”

You snapped out of it and quickly sat beside him to attempt to salvage your water soluble crystal. The said crystal doesn’t even NEED to be cleansed. It was partially dissolved and your eye twitched, thinking that this was such a rookie mistake and you were a stupid witch and now your boyfriend probably thinks that you’re crazy and-

“I have food. Wanna talk about it?”, Oikawa smiled softly, letting go of your wand and began arranging the food on the table.

You looked at him, surprised that he was taking these things lightheartedly. The man even had a smile on his pretty face and was humming some kind of happy song.

The two of you fell in a semi-comfortable silence as both of you ate.

Oikawa looked at you with an unreadable expression. It made a literal waterfall of sweat drop down behind your back despite the cool temperature. He put down his chopsticks and laced his hands on the table. The opening of his mouth to speak seemed like it was on slow motion and you were preparing yourself for the worst.

‘Oh gods, here it comes’, you thought, panicking more and more.

“Sooo... can you curse someone for me?”

“Eh?”

“I have this weird classmate who just kept on clicking his pen repeatedly during exams and it’s SO FRUSTRATING. Like-”

“Now wait a damn minute pretty boy,” your eyes twitched at his literal dismissal of the not-so-normal things that he just saw. “Y-you’re not gonna break up with me? Or like say that I should be burned while tied to a post??” At this point you probably blinked your eyes out at his unexpected reaction.

“Why would I do that? You’re still my girlfriend, right?” he tilted his head to the side before his eyes widened and he gasped loudly. “UNLESS YOU’RE NOT?!!! BAD DEMON. GET OUT OF MY BEAUTIFUL GIRL’S HOT BODY. I’LL GET THE SALT, I SWEAR!” Oikawa exclaimed while reaching towards the salt shaker on the end of the table *it wasn’t salt lol*.

“WHAT- NO YOU IDIOT! IT’S ME-”

“THAT’S WHAT DEMONS SAY AAAHH. Y/N-CHAN THERE’S A SHAPE SHIFTER DOWN HERE TRYING TO KILL ME. IT WANTS TO DONATE MY ORGANS FOR POWER.”

“DEMONS DON’T EVEN DO THAT. TOORU THAT’S NOT EVEN THE SALT, THAT’S SUGAR-”

Let’s just say it took a while to convince your overdramatic boyfriend that it was you.

#haikyuu!!#haikyu #haikyuu #haikyuu imagines #haikyuu x reader #oikawa x reader #oikawa imagine #oikawa imagines #witch au #au #haikyuu au #oikawa au #oikawa tooru #oikawa tooru x reader #tooru x reader #haikyuu witch

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ltleflrt · 4 years

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Feels Like Home Ch 1 - Destiel Version

Small towns are quiet. No cars, very few voices unless one visits the Roadhouse around mealtimes and at sundown when it converts from a diner to the local watering hole. Sometimes the loudest thing a person hears all day is the buzz of electricity, or the hiss of wind kicking sand up against walls.

That’s what Dean loves about Lebanon Kansas. At least now he does. When he was a kid, he’d hated the small town he grew up in. It was too small, barely a wide spot in the road, and he wanted to be part of the bigger world. But after years in the army, and visiting many strange and exotic locations during his service, he came home. The world is too big and too loud sometimes, and Lebanon’s small town silence is exactly what he needs right now.

So the sudden clang of tools is jarring enough to bring his head up to see what the hell is going on. Unfortunately, he’s reminded rather painfully that he’s under the hood of a car when the back of his head connects with it.

Rubbing at the sore spot, Dean extricates himself a little more carefully from the car he’s working on and straightens to see what all the racket is about. From the grumbling and cursing coming from the direction of the workbench at the back of the shop, he has an idea.

Confirming his suspicions, Jo is somewhat violently putting away tools, bitching and growling too low for him to catch any words. Hoping he’s not the current target of her ire, he cautiously makes his way toward the back of the shop.

“Hey, I appreciate your sudden zeal for order,” he says dryly as he watches her throw a wrench into a drawer. It nearly bounces right back out. “But if you break it, you buy it.”

Jo spins around and pins him with her glare. She has another, larger wrench clenched in her fist, and she brandishes it at him. “These tools are made of fucking steel,” she snaps. “I’m sure they’ll be fine!”

She looks pissed enough to bite through one of them, but he’s not dumb enough to tell her that. Showing no fear in the face of her bark but no bite attitude, he pulls a rag out of his back pocket and attempts to clean some of the oile off his hands. He eyes Jo for a moment before his eyes drift to the clock on the wall behind her. It’s late afternoon already, and his stomach growls to remind him that he hasn’t eaten since far too early in the morning. “You want to go to the Roadhouse and get something to eat?” he asks as if Jo isn’t seething with anger in front of him.

He isn’t surprised when she nearly explodes at the suggestion. “No, I don’t want to go to the goddamn Roadhouse. I just came from the goddamn Roadhouse, and now my appetite is ruined!”

“My treat,” he offers, ignoring her outburst.

“Are you deaf?” Jo demands. “Why the hell would I want to go back there?”

Giving up on getting his hands any cleaner without some harsh soap, Dean tucks the rag back in his pocket. Completely unafraid of Jo’s temper, and the heavy tool-slash-weapon in her hand, he steps close and slings an arm over her shoulder. He takes the wrench, twisting until it slips out of her white-knucked grip, and sets it on the bench before guiding her out of the garage and into the afternoon sunlight. “If you don’t go back, she’ll gloat about being right,” Dean says as a blast of heat hits him. He’s already sweaty from working in the garage all morning, but being out of the shade only feels a hair cooler than the surface of the sun at the moment.

“She’s not,” Jo grumbles under her breath. But her spine straightens and she shrugs out from under his arm to march ahead of him.

Dean grins after her, admiring the way the sun glints off her golden curls in an almost angelic fashion. The little spitfire definitely reminds him much more of a demon the rest of the time. A hot breeze sets him in motion again quickly though, and he hurries after her toward the air conditioned interior of the Roadhouse.

As Jo slams through the Roadhouse’s door, the bell clangs loudly to announce her, and he catches it before it swings shut, sighing in relief as cool air envelops him. He wonders what Jo and her mother are fighting about today, but knows better than to ask. Especially not within Ellen’s earshot. He can handle Jo’s temper. On a good day he can handle Ellen’s temper. He’s not stupid enough to think he can ever handle them both at once.

Jo climbs onto a stool and pulls out a menu. She glares at it sullenly, as if she doesn’t have the whole thing memorized forward and back.

“Heya Deano!” Ash calls from behind the counter. His lazy grin doesn’t falter when he turns it on Jo, even when she tries to burn holes into him with her eyes. “Hey there Joanna. Back for revenge?”

Jo only glares harder for a moment before putting him on ignore.

“Hey Ash,” Dean greets cheerfully as he settles onto a stool next to Jo.

“The usual, buddy?” Ash asks. His eyes are bloodshot, and he looks like he just rolled out of bed, but there’s a sharp mind behind that stoner facade. For the umpteenth time, Dean wonders why the hell he’s hanging around Lebanon and not off working for the CIA or some other shady organization.

It’s not worth thinking about too hard though, because he’ll never know the real answer. Ash likes to play up the mystery, and Dean wouldn’t know the truth if he heard it at this point. Instead he turns his attention to filling his empty stomach. Pie sings its siren song from under the glass dome at the end of the counter, but even with the A/C cranked up, Dean’s still feeling overly warm. “How ‘bout the usual plus a chocolate milkshake?

“With or without the wakeup?”

“With.”

Ash taps his knuckles on the counter. “You got it, Deano.” He turns and starts working his magic with the shake mixers behind the bar, and calls through the window that opens into the kitchen. “Hey Benny, make Dean a burger.”

A head pops into view through the serving window, and Benny gives Dean a lazy salute. “Hey, brother,” he greets warmly. “It’ll be ready in a few minutes.”

Dean returns the salute and nods. He turns to his prickly neighbor. “You want anything, Jo?”

“Coffee,” she snaps.

A long sigh comes from the other end of the bar from where Ash is working his magic, and Ellen grabs the pot and carries it over to them. She pours a cup for Jo without a word, then walks away.

Dean resists rolling his eyes where mother or daughter can see him. He’s not angling for a slap upside the head, just lunch.

With a flourish, Ash whirls around and presents him with his shake, distracting Dean from the silent war going on next to him. He takes a long pull off the straw, and sighs happily at the chocolaty coffee flavor. “Thanks, man. That hits the spot.”

“Yeah, it’s damn hot out there today, ain’t it?”

They chat about the weather, even though it barely changes at this time of the year. But soon Benny’s pushing a heaping plate through the serving window and calling “Chow’s up!”

The burger is perfect. Juicy, and piled with onions, just the way Dean likes it. He digs in, groaning at the tang of sharp cheddar, and licking grease from his lips. Jo glares at him with disgust, and turns slightly away from him.

By the time he’s finished the burger and is contemplating how many fries he can manage while still finishing his shake, Ellen and Jo have defrosted and are talking softly while he pretends not to hear them apologizing to each other. Ash is singing off key to the radio as he fills the salt and pepper shakers, and muted clangs and clunks from the kitchen keep him aware of Benny’s presence in the kitchn.

It’s peaceful. It’s the reason he moved back. The quiet and peace of Lebanon keep the nightmares at bay.

But he still startles easily, so when Jo digs her elbow into his ribs it’s only through supreme effort that he doesn’t try to attack her. She notices his aborted movement and raises an eyebrow at him, fully aware of what almost happened but not impressed. But she doesn’t say anything about it, instead tilting her head toward the wall of windows to their right.

“Hey look,” she says, just as he registers the loud rumble of an engine outside, “someone got lost.”

Dean turns to see a motorcycle pulling up to the Roadhouse. Gravel dust rises around the stranger as he comes to a stop, and the music from Ash’s radio seems extra loud when the bike’s engine shuts off. Dean’s eyes trace over the man’s wide shoulders under a black leather jacket as the guy reaches up and pulls off his equally dark helmet. Mesmerized, he follows the guy’s movements as he reaches up and runs fingers through the tousled dark brown hair revealed by the helmet’s removal.

This time when Jo elbows him he doesn’t jump at all, but it’s a reminder to breathe. He lets out a breath he didn’t know he was holding and turns his attention to her, plastering an innocent look on his face and hoping she didn’t see his reaction. Of course he’s not that lucky, and he stifles a groan at the wicket glint in her eyes. “Don’t,” he warns.

Jo shows him her teeth, more of a challenge than a smile. Behind them the bell rings over the door as the stranger walks in.

As one, he and Jo turn to see the newcomer.

The guy stops just inside the door, and smiles shyly at the sudden attention he’s receiving. “Hello,” he says with a nod of greeting before walking toward a booth near the window.s

Dean takes the greeting like a punch to the gut. The guy is hot. Smoking hot. With traces of gray at his temples and a little salt in his not-quite-a-beard. A beautiful mouth, and god those eyes. Dark, maybe blue, and Dean itches to get close enough to find out for sure. And the man’s voice, fuck. Like a shot of whiskey, going straight to Dean’s head.

A little too quickly to appear casual, he turns back to the counter and looks down at the food left on his plate. What the hell is wrong with him? He’s seen plenty of hot men before. Hell, he just has to look up and see Benny in the kitchen to find one.

Out of the corner of his eye he sees Ellen take the man’s order. He catches himself leaning slightly in that direction in an effort to hear the man’s voice again and immediately straightens in his seat. He stuffs a couple fries in his mouth and chews despite the fact that he can’t really taste them anymore.

“Quit being a pussy and go talk to him,” Jo says, thankfully in a low voice that only carries to him.

“What the hell would I talk to him about?” Dean whispers back.

“You could start with an offer for a handjob,” Jo answers. When Dean chokes, she smirks and pounds him on the back, and continues as if she hadn’t nearly killed him. “Come on, it’s a great way to find out if he likes dick.”

Once his windpipe is clear he turns a glare on her. “I like dick, but if a dude started a conversation with that, I wouldn’t be impressed.”

“That’s because you suck at getting with guys,” Ash says, leaning close to join in on the conversation. “Want me to be your wingman, buddy?”

“No thanks, Ash,” Dean says dryly. “Not sure you’d be that much help.”

“I could do it,” Jo offers brightly.

“Yeah, no. That’d be worse.”

Jo punches him in the arm, and he glares at her as he rubs the aching spot. Which is a tactical error, because of course she takes it as a challenge. She gives him a downright evil smile, and slides off her stool, shimmying away from his grasping hands so he can’t prevent the disaster about to happen. She practically bounces across the hardwood floors, and plunks down on the bench opposite of the stranger.

Dean groans. This cannot possibly go well for him.

This is actually a rewrite of chapter 1 of my most popular Mass Effect Fic, Feels Like Home. I don’t know why I feel like doing this, but I do, so here we are.

#oops i ficced #feels like home destiel #destiel #ltleramblings

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dantedwards · 4 years

Text

Sometimes a drink is just a drink.

For such an immaculately kept bar, the lack of patronage was almost...unsettling.

If you closed your eyes you could faintly make out the echoes of what once was: the rattle of ice in stainless steel shakers, the quite thrum of a half dozen conversations bubbling about, soft piano pieces flowing out from a back corner. But when you opened them,everything was silent and still. Absolutely still. Just as eerie as it was serene. Just as off putting as the scene was pristine.

Oh it was bright and cheery enough, bereft of the markers of inactivity, but somehow that made the aura of loss strike more keenly. If the lights had been out and he had seen cloths over tables, stools up on the bar, he may have felt better about the whole thing. May have. But it was unlikely.

Joseph S. Greenman had the feeling, as he descended down steps free of the dust and rust of the outside world, that this place used to mean a hell of a lot to a whoooole mess of people. Those who lived in town and those passing through. Quite possibly more so to the latter than the former. Running a hand along a brass plated rail, he could still feel the sense of...forgiveness, an establishment of this caliber gave freely.

Come in, it said, shake off the cold. You're welcome here.

It had a way of drawing together the disparate elements of a society gone mad, and giving then a place to belong. Even if only for a little while.

Marvelling at the luxury of his surroundings, the Western detective couldn't say he had ever seen its like. Let alone had a change to grace such a place with his presence. Though few ever saw his company as graceful. The glitz and glamor of something so effortlessly chic and timeless was astounding.

Myriad walks of life may have left their footfalls here, but it was clear to whom this space had always catered to. Or at least had been meant to in it's heyday.

As it was, he broke off his musing with a heavy sigh. He could use a place to think. And nothing aided a man in thought quite like a quite spot with a nice drink. Rolling wide shoulders under his overcoat, he dipped out of it and slung the heavy jacket up onto a waiting rack.

Now Joseph had been, not quite given, the key to the front door, in an envelope slid into his room some time the night before. Glancing around as he drew nearer and nearer to the counter, he was fairly certain the proprietor had either recently passed on, leaving the care of the property to another, or felt comfortable enough to invite him in, and him alone.

But not comfortable enough, he had noted, turning the otherwise unremarkable package over, to disclose their name. Which was worrisome enough in it's own right.

He unbuttons his jacket, having forgone the vest, and took a seat smack in the middle of the row of stools. Jo scanned the shelves along the back wall with a practiced eyes.

No two bit back water dive was this. It was lined with only the best, not a half bottle empty to be seen. He chewed his lip a moment, wondering if that was a sign of diligence...or of reduced traffic.

"You've the look of a man embroiled in fitful contemplation. I think I've got just the thing."

She was dressed plain and neat and elegant, matronly without being motherly, prim without all the starched stiffness one would expect, with a ready smile of straight smoke stained teeth that scrunched her eyes over a pair of glasses that would have looked a smidge too big on anyone else. Joseph coughed as he hadn't even heard her approach and gave a nod.

"A man of few words!" She gave a small laugh, "Good. I don't need you to speak. I need you to listen."

"I'm good at that."

"I hope so. You haven't much a reputation here."

"I like it that way."

"Can I just say," she became a whirl of activity across the counter, a mesmerising display of skill and ritual, "it's refreshing to have a thoroughly fresh face about the place?"

"Well I can't stop you, but I do appreciate it."

"Hmm..." She taps her chin. "Yes. Yes I think you will do nicely."

He gave a grunt, watching the reassuring balance of ingredients before him, and placed the key on the counter.

"Why."

"We've come a long way. But it's still a man's world. And some things take a man's hands."

"I ain't looking to kill nobody."

"And I ain't looking to have nobody killed."

Another grunt. A small slide.

Joseph looks at the glass. And takes a sip.

(Called a Southern Slo Down)

"You didn't ask."

"I didn't need to."

"Mr. Greenman," she fairly nearly purrs. "Oh I liiiiike you."

"Ma'am." He dipped his head, and the glass, hiding the ghost of a smile as he sipped quietly for a time, content to let her show as many of her cards as she cared to. For now.

"You may be unlike any man I've ever met."

"Then you either haven't met very many, or only all the wrong ones."

"You honestly think," she cocks a brow, leaning back, "I've come to know that small a number working here? I've seen my share of both."

"My mistake then."

A few more sips. A few more bars.

"I'm not grey about the temples but we both know you didn't slip me this," he taps the key, "just to pour me a drink."

"A question then: would you have poured your own?" She moves back near the counter, the small of her back pressed to it as she watched him sideways.

"I was tempted to."

"Come show me."

Granted, this was hardly the first time an interview of this nature had prompted him for a showcase of his skill. But as he doffed the jacket and rolled up his sleeves he had to admit it was nice for once not to have to use a fist to do it.

No small set of scars crossed his forearms but again, she surprised him. Touching the largest of them without a word, and removing her hand before he could look at her. Even when he did she was adjusting her glasses and reaching into a pocket.

"You may be," he hopped lightly over the bar for a man of his bulk, "unlike any woman I've ever met."

"Then you either haven't met very many," she whispers off to the side, "or only all the wrong ones."

The liquor had done it's job and with rosy cheeks he belted out a genuine laugh. Rich and rolling and reverberating back to them. The first sound of mirth this little corner of illustrious entertainment had heard in many a month.

"What do I call you ma'am?"

"Oh I'm enjoying ma'am just fine," she places a cigarillo to her lips, "but Bridgette would be better."

"Bridgette then," he nods, striking a match off his chin and holding it before her.

"More a gentleman than you appear."

"More a lady than you say."

Match out he's soon dashing too and fro as the glass he intends to use chills.

"You're a fair hand back here."

A plume of smoke passes over his shoulder.

"It's calming."

"You call *this* calming," she cracks a smile of her own, "any quicker and you'll break a sweat!"

"All life takes work," he hefts the second bottle.

"Blood. Sweat. Tears." Setting it down he scans for the third.

"Shed all three before and behind the counter." Jo pours and eyes her up and down, not bothering to measure, not needing to.

Another plume.

"I would wager so have you."

Three dashes.

Two cubes.

One more match.

"But I've never been a gambling man. And don't mean to start now."

He mutters a curse under his breathe and blows out the flame.

"You said you didn't need me to talk and that's precisely what you got me doing."

Both cubes get tossed and he skewers a cherry dug from a mason jar.

"For you."

The elder woman maintains eye contact the entire time she moves to grip the glass and raise it to her lips. Small shiver courses through her frame.

(Called a Pentaque)

"Dinner. Tomorrow night."

Joseph takes his own and salutes her.

"Tomorrow night."

If you closed your eyes you could faintly make out the echoes of what once was: the rattle of ice in stainless steel shakers, the quite thrum of a half dozen conversations bubbling about, soft piano pieces flowing out from a back corner. But when you opened them, something lingered in the air, light as a fading scent drifting out of reach, like so much smoke and mist. But present nonetheless.

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tubular-ihateit · 5 years

Text

The Great Prank War

{Credit to @emovirgil-sanders for the idea}

In which Virgil and Roman start a prank war and chaos ensues.

/ / / / / / / / / / / /

The whole thing had started out as an accident honestly.

It was early in the morning. Too early for either Roman or Virgil to be awake in their opinions. But never the less they were both stumbling around the kitchen in a sleepy daze, each going about making their own hot beverage they hoped would help them feel less like death.

Virgil had groaned out a quiet 'pass the sugar' to which Roman lazily lifted the container down from the self and slid it over to his roommate and childhood friend as he stared down at the steaping cup of herbal tea in front of him.

The sound of a spoon clinking against the side of a ceramic mug was soon followed by the sound of Virgil spitting put his coffee in surprise and shock. The sudden noise caused the more theatrical of the two to snap his head up in concern.

"The fuck?" Virgil muttered, now mostly shaken out of his tired state. First he checked the coffee jar to make sure it was still in date, which it was.

Roman watched him with confusion and looked down at the same time as Virgil to the container Roman had handed him. Instead of seeing the usual sugar shaker that appeared at least twice each morning, sitting beside the mug was the shaker of salt.

The two friends realised three things in this moment.

1) putting the salt and sugar on the same shelf had in fact been a bad idea as Virgil had stated when they first set it all up.

2) salt really did not work in coffee.

3) vengeance will have to be had.

Roman spent the next few days constantly on his toes, looking over his shoulder and jumping at every unfamiliar noise. He felt he was acting rather like his anxious friend, who in all earnest was basically a brother to him. He would constantly keep an eye on him when they were in their home together.

Then, one day when he was getting up to get ready for work he couldn't find any of his shoes (which was odd considering he had so many pairs). He started to panic, wondering what on earth the emo nightmare could have done with them.

He tabled out his room, sliding down the hall with his socks and practically leaping down the stairs to a smirking Virgil on the kitchen doorway, holding a steaming cup of coffee between the sleeves of his oversized hoodie.

"Mornin'." Roman looked around before turing his gaze back to the slightly shorter male.

"Where are they?" He demanded. Virgil gave a small shrug and a sip of his coffee.

"Whatever do you mean Roman?" Safe to say he was not amused by this.

"The shoes. All of them. Where?"

"How would I know?" Virgil turned his gaze to the window on their front door. "Lovely day for tree climbing isn't it?"

Roman's eyes widened in quick realisation and he sprinted to the door, throwing it open then taking a step back in shock as he saw the tree at the bottom of their lawn that was now littered with shoes. HIS shoes.

Virgil slowly made his way to beside Roman.

"Huh, I guess shoes do grow on trees. Weird." He patted Romans shoulder and turned away, heading back into the kitchen to finish off his coffee. "Have fun with that sir sing-a-lot." Roman grumbled but made his way down the garden to start retrieving his shoes.

It was only a few days later the Virgil awoke to his entire floor covered in brightly coloured legos and his walls plastered with neon post-it notes. Then a harsh knock on his already open door.

"Good morning! Dear me, seems you have a bit of a situation there."

"Roman..." Virgil hissed lowly, sitting up in his bed and sending a glare towards his roommate.

"Oh well, good luck with that." And just like that he was casually making his way out to work.

"Roman!" Virgil tried calling after him, tired and agitated. After no response he groaned and mumbled curses to himself as he tried to navigate the death trap of legos.

It was a day later, when Roman was getting back from a shopping run that the next prank hit.

A failed sense of security had settled over him, expect it to have taken a couple of days for something to happen. Virgil took full advantage of this.

At first nothing really seemed off, but then Roman noticed an odd hissing. Being the 'brave' one out of him and Virgil he decided it was his duty to investigate. When he followed the sound he realised it was coming from the bathroom.

He cautiously opened the door and almost feel, letting out a high pitched screem, when he was greeted with a bowa constrictor slithering around his bathroom floor and over the towel rack.

"Begone, you nave! Foul tresspassor! This is not your land!" Roman yelled while waving around a towel in the direction of the snake.

After a few moments of watching him flailing around Virgil emerged from his room laughing and picked up the snake calmly.

"Glad to see you an Ethan are well acquainted now." He hummed before heading back to his room a shutting the door, leaving a flustered Roman behind.

Romans next prank didn't exactly go to plan. The idea was to post up pictures of himself on every possible surface that Virgil would see for long periods of time. He had done this successfully, until Virgil had countered by putting the world's worst collection of moustaches on every single one. He might have been less offended had Virgil of not put in the extra effort to make his moustache art look spectacularly like it was done by a five year old high on sugar and juice.

This war went on, back a fourth between the two for months, driving everyone one around them insane. At one point Roman managed to get a group of his co-workers to dress up like him and he brought them home. Virgil was sufficiently freaked out when he walked in to find six different versions of his roommate scattered around his home, but easily turned the tables by getting them all to pie Roman in the face the next day at work during different times (which led to four total outfit changes for the princely man that day). After that, everyone unofficially agreed to not get involved.

Neither man seemed to ever run put of new ideas for a good hearted prank they could play, although ocassionaly they would take an old one and do it in a different way. Like when Roman plastered sheets of the lyrics to every disney song ever around every single iteam Virgil owned. Then a few pranks down the line did the same thing but with sickeningly over-positive motivational quotes.

It was a battle hard fought on both sides. There was balloons, cream, lamp shades, plants and yes, even syrup. Oh the syrup. Days of scrubbing and it still lingered in remnants everywhere.

It was only after Logan and Patton stepped in that the war between the two stopped. They now had a common enemy. And thus started the "Great Prank War: the sequel".

#virgil sanders #creativity #princey #patton sanders #morality #logan sanders #logic #pranks #prank war #platonic #prinxiety #roman sanders #i tried #sanderssides #thomas sanders #did i do ok?#idk if it satisfies yall or no

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barberwitch · 6 years

Text

Witch Tip Wednesday 4.18.18

Witching When You Need It

Coffee Shops

Not everyone has a witch kit to go, or they’re in the process of making one and need small supplies to add to it! Coffee shops are one of my favorite places to go for portable stuff, or if I left my witch kit at home and really need a boost.

Most coffee shops will have several ingredients you can get for free, or for a nominal price, especially if you regularly go there:

Below are some ingredients and some correspondences. Just some inspiration, but use what works for you.

Coffee

Grounds can be used for divination, much like tea leaves

Some people read the swirls that appear when pouring in milk.

Stores will sometimes give used grounds to use in your garden.

Invigoration and/boosting

Cleansing

Some people use for hex breaking, but caffeine also restrict blood vessels, so could conceivably be used for casing hexes too

Tea

A lot of people forget that you don’t just have to drink tea, they’re bundles of herbs, so look at herbal correspondences you may find!

Chamomile, green, white, Black, oolong, roobos, citrus, jasmine, Masala Chai (usually has black tea, cinnamon, clove and cardamom, but varies by brand), Earl Grey (bergamot and black tea) all can be used for their herbal correspondences.

Divination with tasseography!

Cinnamon

Usually in a shaker bottle, so keep that in mind.

Associations with sun and fire

Psychic boost for divination

Spirit communication

Blessing and healing

Protection

Love magic

Heating things up

Honey

Make a honey jar spell

Attraction

Glamour magic

Achieving goals/manifestation

Offerings

Cream

Tons of folklore about cream, read up and see if anything fits for you

Offerings

Divination (see coffee)

Rock sugar/white sugar

Love magic

Glamour

Attraction

Prosperity

Multiplying

Smoothing things over

Making other receptive

Now, if the shop also has food, usually they can be depended on to have a few more ingredients

Pepper

Banishing

Binding

Curse work, hexing, jinxing

Cleansing

Protection

Grounding

Salt

Cleansing

Grounding

Protection

Water connection if sea salt

Preservation

Lemon Wedges

Love magic

Representative of the Sun

Connects to water and lunar energy (idk, they seem to conflict but you get mixed messages)

Purification

Curse work, hexing and jinxing

Natural astringent and antibacterial

So there you go! Some pretty common ingredients you can grab in a pinch, and the benefit is that most of them are served at all major coffee chains, and even a lot of small ones. Good luck out there!

🦇Cheers, Barberwitch

Like this? Buy me a ko-fi! I really appreciate it

Original content of this blog is licensed under a Creative Commins Attributution-NonCommercial-NoDerivatives 4.0 International license.

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shiftythrifting · 6 years

Photo

My recent trip to SEVCA in Springfield, VT. Highlights include: 1. This slightly horrifying candle holder. 2. A homemade martini glass 3. One of those creepy figurines that are always in thrift stores, but with busted glasses. 4. This figurine missing an arm 5. This cursed Humpty Dumpty cookie jar 6. I don’t know what these are. They’re shaped like green cheeses, and might be salt n pepper shakers. 7. A bedazzler 8. This stunning painting of an owl.

#submission #thrifting #thrift finds #figures #housewares #weird #decor

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yutamint · 7 years

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apartment shopping w/ yuta!!

smol and quick lil bullet au scenario thing bc i’m moving into my very first apartment this friday and i actually might DIE.... anyways ya i was thinking about this and it’s rly short and kind of whatever but ye ye pls enjoy

pairing: yuta nakamoto x reader

genre: this is aalll fluff

notes: i say like one or two curse words but other than that pls enjoy

word count: 587

ok let us begin

so you guys finaally bought your first apartment together and !!! so much responsibility

and ofc you’re excited to move in w/ yuta but you’re mainly excited to go shopping

bc.... ikea.... and target..... and everything wonderful

yuta is lowkey excited too but he lets you decide color schemes n everything bc he trusts your eye and tbh he really doesn’t care as long as he gets to wake up next to you!!!! gross ik sorry

you want to go for a very simple/homey vibe so think like whites?? blacks?? monochrome things?? but w/ a splash of like blue maybe?? whatever ur heart desires

“can we get body mirrors?” “wait yuta you want more than one mirror” “well yeah one for me and one for you duh” “why cant we share” “what if you get in my way” “ok two mirrors”

target to you..... is like.... a candy shop to a kid..... your world, your happiness, your everything, the actual love of your life (besides yuta i guESS)

“let’s get fluffy pillows” “why do we need these they are so uncomfortable” “we can put them on the couch” “do we even have a couch” “???? idk let’s just get them” and yuta sighs bc nothing will stop you

ok you guys literally had to get two carts bc you couldn’t stop yourself you just kept adding shit into the carts until it looked like it was about to topple

“yUTA AROMA DIFFUSERS ARE ON SALE LET’S GET FIVE” “why..... would.... we need..... five..... can we get one....” “but they’re buy four get one free??” “what do we do.... with the other four” “we can gift them to our friends!! johnny would like one”

so you call up johnny and you’re like “hEY DO YOU WANT AN AROMA DIFFUSER” and he’s like “HELL YEAH I DO” and so that’s how five aroma diffusers got into your cart

and candles!!!! omg so many candles!!! you love candles bc they are so soothing and ugh i love candles too!!

“babe why do we need candles when we have aroma diffusers” “they’re very relaxing and i like using them when i take baths”

yuta at this point has given up bc you guys don’t have actual furniture yet just really random shit that you might never use

he looks at the cart and ... “y/n what are these” “they’re salt and pepper shakers!! aren’t they cute they’re shaped like lil snowmen!!” “it’s september and how are we supposed to use these if we don’t have anything to cook with” “oh.... we should probably get pans or something huh”

and he just shakes his head and kisses your forehead bc siGH this is why he loves you

and so i guess it turns into yuta buying all the necessary items for your guys’ apartment bc... you both know it wasn’t gonna be YOU

in the end you guys managed to get everything you needed and even though you said goodbye to three cupcake scented candles, a pack of mason jars, and a rly cute dog sweater (to which yuta said “i don’t even know why you tried to buy the sweater... we don’t even have a dog”) you two were happy and content and everything in between

“thanks for dealing with me today, i know i was kind of annoying” “i always deal with you y/n but i don’t know what you’re talking about you’re never annoying.... we’ll go back next week to get those candles” “thank you” “i love you okay don’t forget” “i love you too yuta”

i’m so soft fuck i want to buy candles now

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tabletoptrinketsbyjj · 7 years

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Trinkets, Valuable, 2: More useful than simple baubles touched mystery, these items have either a clear purpose, a reliable ability or are made from a fairly costly material. The items could fetch fair prices to collectors of the strange, jewelers, antique or art dealers or simply to barter with if the owner is short on actual currency.

A beautiful set of gold filigree tarot cards inside a velum lined box. This deck once belonged to a fortuneteller who fell afoul of darkness.

A black wedge that weighs one pound and becomes one pound heavier each month it remains in the possession of the same creature

A blanket which renders any creature wrapped in it invisible, but only when they are unconscious and snoring.

A bolt of opalescent silken fabric that ripples and sparkles when kissed.

A bottle of ink that never goes dry or runs out

A bottle of red wine which appears thick and viscous. Anyone drinking even the smallest sample will be cursed with hematophagy, meaning they now only gain nourishment from fresh blood. The curse can be broken by laying naked in bright, direct sunlight for eight uninterrupted hours.

A chain of alternating silver and bronze links. The silver links are ethereal, while the bronze links are not, but they can still interact with the other links.

A clear glass rod that becomes a Random Color based on who is currently holding it (It is always the same color for the same people).

A coin pouch containing four slender golden ingots that are no larger than a grown man’s finger. Each is stamped with the sigil of a stylized spider.

A coin purse containing a dozen gold coins, each meticulously defaced and crudely carved with the face of a grinning goblin.

---Keep reading for 90 more trinkets.

---Note: The previous 10 items are repeated for easier rolling on a d100.

A beautiful set of gold filigree tarot cards inside a velum lined box. This deck once belonged to a fortuneteller who fell afoul of darkness.

A black wedge that weighs one pound and becomes one pound heavier each month it remains in the possession of the same creature

A blanket which renders any creature wrapped in it invisible, but only when they are unconscious and snoring.

A bolt of opalescent silken fabric that ripples and sparkles when kissed.

A bottle of ink that never goes dry or runs out

A chain of alternating silver and bronze links. The silver links are ethereal, while the bronze links are not, but they can still interact with the other links.

A clear glass rod that becomes a Random Color based on who is currently holding it (It is always the same color for the same people).

A coin pouch containing four slender golden ingots that are no larger than a grown man’s finger. Each is stamped with the sigil of a stylized spider.

A coin purse containing a dozen gold coins, each meticulously defaced and crudely carved with the face of a grinning goblin.

A crystal beaker with the measurements in some long forgotten standard, etched in platinum.

A cube of ice that never melts

A dented iron tankard that turns anything poured inside into raw sewage.

A fist sized clear glass sphere with an iron arrowhead inside it whose tip always points at the sun.

A fist sized, unbreakable glass pyramid filled with what appears to be ice or snow. It is always cool to the touch.

A fist-sized gemstone that changes colour corresponding with the time of day, along with the phases of the moon (assuming you have one moon).

A fist-sized glass sphere that floats through the air, never straying more than two feet from its owner

A five-foot length of string that is capable of hanging perfectly horizontal without being tied to anything. It cannot support any weight however.

A flat circular stone which causes its bearer to smell like wildflowers.

A flute with buttons rather than holes so you can play music without blowing into it

A foot long glass rod that shatters easily but then instantly reforms from the shards

A foot long steel rod with a crystal embedded in its tip, which emits light when within a magnetic field.

A foot-long glass rod that, when placed in a container of liquid, will stir until it is taken out.

A glass eyeball that emits a projection of a human face that changes expression depending on the direction in which it’s looking

A glass jar filled with an edible, creamy white substance that fills back to the top each day at dawn. The substances tastes sweet but has zero nutritional or caloric value whatsoever.

A glass rod that projects a three-foot square, two-dimensional image of an unknown creature on any flat surface.

A golden armband forged in the shape of a serpent eating its own tail. The serpent is masterfully crafted and its eyes, fangs and the tiny scales covering its body are finely detailed.

A golden mechanical songbird. It is capable of playing three different tunes.

A green glass marble that floats next to its owner and whistles when they are angry

A hand crank music box which plays a melody that causes listeners to think they are dreaming.

A horn and horsehair toothbrush with bristles that always have exactly the right feel for the user and leaves the mouth feeling clean and minty fresh. The toothbrush automatically sterilizes itself if the brushes are submerged in water for one minute.

A jar of face paint that starts out black and changes color to match the bearer’s mood while worn

A knapsack that temporarily (and seemingly randomly) changes the color of anything placed within it. The change wears off five minutes after the objects leave the bag.

A knife block carved from jade, holding four knives, each with a handle made from jade and set with pearl fasteners. The blades are of bright, sharp, steel.

A large, sealed waterproof tube containing a bolt of a luxurious satin-like cloth

A leather map case that creates one sheet of new paper each day

A long-handled silver spoon that brings everything in it to the perfect eating or drinking temperature

A magical animated broomstick that sweeps only the ceiling. Can only be deactivated by touch.

A magnetic iron wedge that always points east when placed on the ground

A marble sized glass orb that orbits the head of the last person to touch it.

A marionette with a ceramic face that has a long hook nose and blue eyes, covered in flowing multi-colored silk, and a cross of light blue-silver metal and resilient strings made of the same. The toy is five feet from top to bottom.

A masterwork suit of feather-light plate mail which seems to have been made for the exclusive wear and use of a standard sized housecat

A metal ball that perfectly camouflages itself to whatever it’s touching. It turns white when you whistle at it.

A metal rod bent into a triangle that frightens off small animals with its mere presence

A metal rod that makes anyone who touches it sneeze, but never more than once every few minutes

A metallic mask that fits perfectly on its wielder’s face and changes expression when he does.

A mirror in a silver pointed starburst setting with wide triangular leaves. The top has a large round intaglio black opal, and each of the wings are cameo-set with round moonstone and onyx.

A monocle that shows different colored auras around people depending on the time of day they were born

A painting of an ogre eating a sheep that has a dark somber quality to it. The frame is made from silver and is set with a dozen, intaglio-cut rose quartz

A painting set in a silver frame that shows a new, beautiful scenic image of a place in the material plane every day

A pair of large brass shoulder pads that make the wielder’s body shimmer with golden light when worn.

A pair of pants that fit perfectly and never seem to get dirty but are always uncomfortably chilly

A pair of shining silver balls that chime when clicked together.

A pair of silk stockings that are always warm to the touch

A pair of tailor’s shears that can cut through any kind of leather.

A piece of lava rock that is cool to the touch but never stops flowing with bright red lava

A pouch of six seeds that, when planted, grow into thick shaped bushes over the next twenty days and function as hollow shelters large enough to accommodate one hound-sized animal each

A pretty silver hairpin that can be easily used as a lockpick and never suffers any kind of damage when used for such purpose

A quill pen that only marks on living flesh without the need for ink. The marks fade in a week

A Randomly Colored metal sphere, three inches in diameter that floats one inch overtop of any solid surface it’s placed on. It can support one pound of weight while floating.

A red rag intended to be wrapped around the scabbard of a sword. It magically whisks away blood and other liquids from a sword as it is sheathed.

A rolled-up piece of metal that plays soothing music when it gets warm

A sandstone pyramid that gives off a Randomly Colored light as bright as a candle, for one hour at a random time each day.

A scarf made of Randomly Colored silk but is virtually indestructible and cannot be dirtied or stained

A sealed scroll tube containing deed proclaiming the bearer of the parchment as the owner of a house in an underwater city. Both the scroll tube and the parchment are completely waterproof.

A set of five small metallic plates that can be set to orbit around a single creature’s and display ever-changing, unknown symbols

A set of four steel arm and leg bands which cause small harmless sparks to dance across the wielders body at all times, if all four are worn.

A set of salt and pepper shakers shaped like the front and back half of a unicorn, made of porcelain and inlaid with gold and silver

A set of small silver figures, each representing a different circus performer in a different pose. There is the Master of Ceremonies with his arms outspread, a strongman lifting up a barbell, an acrobat standing on her hands, a lion tamer with a lion, and a monkey riding an elephant.

A set of three glowing crystal rings that slowly orbit whatever they are placed around. They can be used as a bracelet or necklace.

A shadowbox which contains a large, perfect, glowing specimen of a moth. The specimen goes through its entire lifecycle as long as the box is closed. When it is opened, the specimen is found freshly preserved in whatever state of life it was at the time. When it grows old and would die, the old specimen is apparently removed, and a new egg appears in the box to live out its life.

A sheet of papyrus that captures a person’s portrait when a command word is spoken (reusable if the command word is known).

A short silver chain joining two crystal rings together. It’s fairly obvious the rings are meant to be worn on adjacent fingers with the chain serving as additional decoration.

A shrunken, shriveled head of a halfling. This morbid fetish has eyes which dart to and fro when the living are nearby. The owner of the head can command it to sing songs about heroes of old, which is does reasonably well.

A silk scarf that if passed over anything while being focused on, will instantly matches the colour of that object

A silver cylinder that, if spoken through, makes the user’s voice sound wavering and strange

A silver fork that makes every word the holder hears seem incredibly rude and offensive

A six-inch metal string that stretches to eight feet without breaking

A slender glass rod that translates everything said while holding it into a language no one can understand.

A small and incredibly detailed (And strangely beautiful) stone statuette depicts a huge worm-like creature bursting forth from the ground. It is obviously the work of a master craftsman. Perceptive PCs can even make out a tiny pair of legs protruding from the creature’s mouth.

A small ceramic disk, that makes quiet soothing noises that are only audible to creatures within five feet of it. Most beings find the gentle sounds aid them in falling asleep in unfamiliar places. The disk can be turned on and off by tapping it gently.

A small coin purse containing six pellets that, when dropped into liquid, remove its flavor and color

A small crystal sphere that glows as bright as a candle under starlight

A small glass flask containing the hair of a desert dwelling creature, the hair absorbs light during the day and glows at night. If exposed to the sunlight during the day it will shed light equivalent to a candle.

A small golden bell that gives off rich sounds when rung

A small golden button with a few green threads still attached. A prancing unicorn is embossed on the design of the button. If sewn on a garment and then worn, the button will teleport away the user’s clothing to a fairy circle.

A small golden jewellery box covered in strange decorations and unknown writing.

A small golden statuette of a man that is constantly river dancing.

A small grey stone disk that grows darker in color when within 100 feet of water.

A small hand mirror that makes anyone who looks into it feel handsome / beautiful and physically desirable.

A small hand mirror that shows a much older version of the viewer

A small hourglass necklace which has been crafted from pure silver.

A small ink pot that was cleverly fashioned from a tiny hollow stalagmite. The top of the stalagmite has been sliced off and reattached with an intricate set of hinges forged to depict two nesting bats. A silver clasp holds the pot shut. Of the matching quill, if there ever was one, there is no sign.

A small jewllery box that, when touched, creates the disconcerting rustling sound of hundreds of small insects coming from inside. The volume of the noise increases the more the lid is touched and starts chittering angrily if the lid is opened. The box is empty unless items are placed inside of it.

A small marble birdbath, inlaid with gold.

A small metal ball that tastes like sweet mint and leaves the tongue stained yellow if sucked on. The flavor never runs out.

A small metallic potted shrub that produces several brightly colored glass beads every week. The shrub needs to be watered with liquid contains heavy metals, silica or finely ground quartz in order to flourish.

A small model of a castle that matches a real one exactly and changes to match new alterations.

A small painting that displays a different face every day. Usually the face is smiling, but on every fifth day it is weeping. No face is ever repeated and the quality of the painting itself is exceptional

A small pink stone that, when placed under the tongue, causes harmless fog vapor to spill from the mouth, until it’s removed.

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