Reblog to kiss a narcissist on the forehead

Fuck the stigma around NPD.

I love narcissists.

I want narcissists to succeed in life.

I want narcissists to find happiness.

I want narcissists to have healthy and effective support systems.

I want narcissists to be able to say they have their disorder without it being demonized.

I want narcissists to take care of themselves.

Because that's what narcissists deserve.

Because narcissists are people.

seeing an anti-narcissist post talking about how narcissists will believe they're good people and never realize the harm they're doing.

It is really amazing how anti-narcissist folks fit their own definition of narcissism.

Because when we even try to calmly explain, no accusatory language, to them why they are harming victims of abuse as well and why they are dehumanizing a group of people, they will instantly use their trauma and abuse as a reason for why they aren't wrong and believe they are standing up for victims of abuse.

Narcissists are victims of abuse too. My abusive mom is, I am. Like. You're demonizing a group of abuse victims as if it'll help you heal at all by acting like the narcissist is evil and self loathing. Regardless of whether your abuser has NPD or not doesn't matter. My mom's autism adds to her mistreatment of me. She takes things at face value and will neglect me even when I flat out tell her. It's not a trait of autistic abuse. Disorders do affect treatment of people, duh, because it affects their world view and how they perceived things. Like, how someone depressed may have their self image warped as well as their view of people around em. But that does not make it "disorder abuse." The disorder didn't abuse you, people with the disorder aren't more likely to be abusive or have their symptoms/traits affect others. You have a warped view because of trauma too. And people may use their disorders as a scapegoat (my ex used his depression a lot for his mistreatment of me and even blamed me for his depression), but it doesn't make it disorder abuse. It doesn't mean every person with the disorder is evil. And if you're someone who can "separate a narcissist from someone with NPD cause they are different" you fail to see how the correlation still harms people with NPD. That's why we ask you to use different terms.

We can't find solace in trauma and mental health spaces because of this anti-narcissist rhetoric and belief. That narcissists are bad and abusive and will always hurt you and can't love. Trauma victims with NPD can't even be welcomed in most trauma victim spaces because of this. People with NPD cannot look up help for their disorder without being bombarded with how to cope with the toxic narcissist. Just think about it for more than 5 seconds and try to empathize with us (since anti-narcs love using empathy, here you go.)

Empathize with us. Show us compassion. You ARE hurting victims. You're throwing trauma victims under a bus as a scapegoat and an outlet for you cause of your abuser hurting you. It IS a you problem. We are asking that you listen to us and learn and actually show us compassion and treat us like people. Honestly.

And don't even try to say "well you're a narcissist, of course you'd say that." That is literally ignoring what we say because of a bias you have with the disorder. I am saying this cause I shouldn't have to be wary of mental health spaces, I shouldn't have to go on Tumblr and find the NPD community to help me through narc crashes. I was having a narc crash and tried to find help on Google, all it did was make me suicidal instead of wanting to self harm. I could have died! And I have seen stories of other people with NPD killing themselves because of the stigma! This is a fucking real issue and me being a narcissist and affected by this ableism does not discredit what I say. Just please listen!

But if you're unwilling to, just block me. Because if you aren't willing to listen and learn and try to understand then don't even bother interacting with me, even negatively. I won't waste my time on people refusing to listen.

Narcissists are so beautiful and handsome and wonderful, they deserve to be proud for all that they have survived especially with such a distressing disorder

Narc abuse news article except its a platonic hyper empath x narcissist fanfic where the hyper empath compliments the narcissist and the narcissist feels it and hypes up and the empath feels that vibe and feels better and the cycle repeats

Now thats fucking friendship

Narcissists I love you, sociopaths I love you, psychotics I love you, low empathy people I love you, people with demonized disorders I love you, people who are questioning if you have a demonized disorder I love you, you all deserve to have a space that makes you feel safe and you deserve help and to recover from your illnesses and trauma

Idk how people will be anti self dx and then call sb a narcissist like so I can't diagnose myself based on my lived experiences and research because I don't have the qualifications to diagnose others but you who also doesn't have that qualification can diagnose people with a disorder you probably barely know about?

This post is not about being concerned and telling someone you know personally that they should look into something to see if that might be the case, that's a suggestion. This post is talking about people who are making videos on YouTubers who get exposed and calling them narcissists like... You don't even know them. Besides they usually won't even show signs of NPD, they'll just be manipulative and maybe have a pretty big ego and sense of self importance but none of the other signs, like an unstable sense of self, need to be praised, or a genuine lack of empathy* are present. And that's only to name a few symptoms, others also rarely appear when these YouTubers get called narcissists for being bad people. A narcissist is not the same as being a bad person, you can't call everyone you don't like a narcissist. Despite the people I'm specifically referring to, this post can also be about anyone calling somebody, even someone they know, a narcissist without having a single clue how the person thinks or what narcissism even is.

*A lack of empathy is not the same as not caring about others. Empathy is the ability to understand how others feel, and to feel with them. A lack of empathy is not a lack of compassion. It does not mean you don't care about others. It means you can't really understand how others feel. You can't read their feelings and you don't feel a certain way just because they feel a certain way. People who don't have empathy can still care about others and people who have empathy don't necessarily care about the feelings of other people. Being able to understand the feelings of others doesn't necessarily mean you give a shit about the way they feel, and you may even find delight in someone being upset if you wanted them to hurt.

common disproven myths about NPD (from a narcissist) 💗

🎀 ▪︎ narcissist abuse isn't real. you wouldn't call an abuser with depression "depressive abuse" or someone with bipolar "bipolar abuse". It's a term meant specifically to attack people with NPD, regardless if they're victims theirself. its just emotional abuse. Stop demonizing specific complex disorders that vary on a case to case basis in order to deal with your own trauma.

🎀 ▪︎ low/no empathy does not mean people with NPD cannot learn to care about people.

🎀 ▪︎ not everyone with NPD wants to be cured, and that's completely acceptable.

🎀 ▪︎ the idea that "real narcissists would never tell anyone they're narcissists" is ableist bullshit spread around to convince people to witch hunt and bully individuals who're trying to recognize their own traits.

ALL NARCISSISTS ARE VALID. DON'T LET ANYONE TELL YOU OTHERWISE.

btw stop demonizing every mental disorder thats not like,,, mild social anxiety . if thats where your support ends then its not really support

anyway heres some positivity for my mentally ill folks ❤️

plain text: anyway heres some positivity for my mentally ill folks ❤️

a lot of text under the cut

if you have ocd i love you and i hope you have an amazing day

if you have hoarding ocd youre so amazing and just remember it doesn't make you gross

if you have pocd just remember that i know you would never hurt a child, you are worthy of love and you deserve to be able to seek help or talk to people about your condition without getting shamed.

remember you are not your intrusive thoughts, even if they say terrible things that does not mean you're a terrible person

if you have low or no empathy you are still an amazing person and a lack of empathy does not mean a lack of care, im sure you care about those you love in your own way and you deserve to be cared about in return. hell even if you don't care or find it hard to care about people you still deserve to be cared about and treated well because youre still a person and youre a good person despite what people might say.

mid or high support needs autistics i know a lot of the autism communities online are mostly low support needs autistics but you are still as much a part of the community as they are, its okay to need more help or accomodations than other people around you. accommodations are amazing and not at all something to be ashamed of.

you have a learning disability ? that's totally fine, our education system is made to fit a very specific niche of people and if you're not a part of that neiche that does not mean you're stupid, you're smart in your own ways and you can do amazing things.

you have a cluster b disorder ? that does not make you an abuser, you are not defined by the actions of a bad person with the same disorder, your disorder does not make you a bad person. your morals and actions are not determined by a disorder and people who say that are uneducated.

whatever youre struggling with remember that you are loved, there are people who care about you, and you are not defined by your struggles <3

I decided to create a separate blog for my posts about narcissism, @quitblamingnarcissism.

“i love vampires because they’re hot and i want to bite people/be bitten, cool gothic motifs and religious trauma”

completely valid, 100%. me too

but i really love vampires because i have cluster-b disorder symptoms and representing them through appealing monsters makes me feel better about how awful it is to be demonized and live like this

Your parents are not "narcissists". They're typical authoritarian assholes who treat you like their property because society allows them to.

Your ex boyfriend is not a "narcissist". He's a typical misogynistic douchebag who treats women like shit because society allows him to.

Your boss is not a "narcissist". They're a typical classist dipshit who thinks workers' entire purpose in life is to generate profit because society allows them to.

And even if they happen to be a "narcissist", that's not what gave them the power to get away with abuse.

So stop blaming mental illness and start blaming society's normalization of abuse. Stop acting like someone has to have a mental illness in order to do something cruel when ordinary people have been doing atrocious things since forever.

Narcissists, I love you. I love you. I love you.

You don't need to have energy to deserve anyone's love.

You don't need to be kind to deserve anyone's love.

You don't need to be smart to deserve anyone's love.

You don't need any talent to deserve anyone's love.

You don't need to love any way to deserve anyone's love.

You deserve it now. As you are. Unconditionally.

accepting aspd and npd traits instead of clinging to the ideal of a "good person" and clinging desperately to my hyperempathy made me way happier.

I let myself have my empathy gaps and times where I can't empathize at all. I let myself be more apathetic and straight forward. It actually allows me to communicate my emotions and trauma without having a meltdown and hurting myself or having a psychotic episode and lashing out and screaming.

Letting myself be narcissistic allowed me to ask for reassurance and attention, ask for praise, and act out how I felt without feeling the need to hate myself for it.

I could tell my friend "I know this is a sad thing for you, but I really don't care and I can't tell if this is okay or if I should try to give you comfort. Can you please tell me what you need so I may give it to you?" "I know you just lost your pet, but I feel absolutely nothing right now because I can't handle loss and I'll probably feel the emotions in a few days. So I'm sorry if I come off like I don't give a shit."

And then she said "it's okay, I understand. I just don't know how to feel or who to go to. Can I just have some comfort?"

Oh my god, it is so easy when you don't demonize your already stigmatized traits. I clung so hard to being a good person just to still be called bad and treated as a monster. Now I don't give a shit cause I know me, I know my experiences, and I am seeing so much healthy communication between me and my gf and me and MA. Every day our relationships get so much better. It's almost like stigma hurts traumatized individuals, gasp!

Yeah there's negative parts to my disorders, but I try to focus on the positive points otherwise I'm at risk for harm and we have to protect our body from harm. I'm so incredibly unstable and dissociated all the time. My narcissism lets me feel worth it and on top of the world. My antisocialness lets me no longer rely on people in a toxic dependent way and to also find the courage to stand up for myself instead of constantly trying to people please. I've had these traits so hidden within me cause of the expectation of a good person placed on me and because of them being "evil" disorders.

But fuck, man. I finally started being better when I realized they weren't evil disorders and I wasn't bad for having them. And seeing shit that you're constantly abusive and evil and can't feel love fucking hurts. I struggle to connect with people, my love is shown so differently, but that's okay.

So yeah, ableists, you can learn something or you can shut up and leave. We love antisocial folks and narcissistic folks around here. We rule! ^v^

This is specifically about NPD/ASPD, but any PD disorder, you're loved to especially if you fall into the category that doesn't fit the bullshit expectations of a "good person" or "good neurodivergent." You deserve some fucking love and you're welcome here.

uhh???

the thing that gets me the most about ableism against pd’s is that ppl will be like “these disorders make you an ASSHOLE!!!!” and then turn around and pretend that other disorders can’t and don’t make you act shitty.

depression and anxiety can make you irritable and snappy. they can cause you to refuse to listen to people and to be distant and withdrawn. they can cause you to seem angry, bitchy, rude, uncaring, etc.

ptsd causes an array of difficulties in forming meaningful relationships. it pretty much shakes up your entire worldview and sense of self a lot of the time. ptsd can cause you to get angry often. it can cause you to yell and scream. it can cause you to withdraw from others, run away, or cut them out. it can cause general changes in demeanor and more cynical worldviews. it can make you seem grouchy, negative, explosive, impolite, difficult, needy, controlling, etc.

and yet when people with personality disorders have symptoms of that nature, suddenly we are irredeemable monsters. when it’s npd, bpd, hpd, or aspd instead of ptsd or depression and anxiety, people suddenly and magically lose the ability to be understanding.

mental illness is an explanation, not an excuse. i firmly believe that. hurting others is never justified simply because you have any disorder.

but if you can be patient with people who have depression, anxiety, ptsd, ocd, or any other more well understood mental illness, you can be patient with us.