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swordofpevensie · 3 years

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We Will See (Prince Caspian x You Fic.)

requested: by @lovecatystuff Hi! Could you write something with Caspian and arranged marriage, when both of them didn't want it at the beginning but later he see how caring and lovely she is, please? Thank you in advance! 💜💜💜

warnings: angst, arranged marriage, the reader (you) has a terrible father, mentions of violence, implying of rape, almost violence, we defeat sexist idiots here, miraz is a jerk, slowburn.

word count: 5005

a/n: i sincelery hope you like it caty because you are so cute and deserve to be happy. i’m so excited to share it with you! (｡♡‿♡｡)

my masterlist is not here because you know, i broke it.

.*･｡ﾟ ༘✧

The first time you saw Caspian, you were sure that you hated him. First of all, he was so spoiled, because he was the prince of a strong empire. He was also conceited. He didn't even greet you. And you could tell he was doing his best not to look at you.

While your father and Miraz were discussing how this marriage would be and its benefits, you and Caspian just sit there. No one asked you what you thought, if you wanted to get married, if you liked each other. You felt like a worthless and pathetic animal waiting to be sold to its new owner. You wanted to cry and escape from that room, that castle and get lost. You wanted to be alone for the rest of your life because you were sick of your greedy father and sacrificing yourself for his benefits.

“My Lord,” You heard your father speaking. “I'm sure this marriage will make both of us stronger than we already are.”

Miraz nodded; there was an evil smile on his face.

“You know she will stay here,” He spoke. “Is she good and obedient? I don't want a bride who is a rebel in my castle.”

Your father had a little flashback about you. You fighting with a sword, showing up in the castle covered in mud, the time you bit a man's hand because he was trying to stop you from fighting, you yelling at your father because he didn't allow you to go outside, the time you fell into a hole with your horse while you were training.

“She is absolutely obedient, my Lord.” Your father said. You tried so hard not to smile. “She will not cause you any problems.”

Miraz looked at you; there was something in his eyes that made you so uncomfortable. But you didn't look away, answered his eyes and stared at him until he felt annoyed and turned his head.

“Then, let the preparations begin!” Miraz shouted.

Your father signified you to come with his hand. When you stood up to go, Caspian did the same.

“May I talk with you before you leave, Princess Y/N?”

You didn't ask your father for permission on purpose. He beat you and forced to you to get married no matter how hard you tried to fight back and stop him. Now, you were determined to turn his life into a ceaseless torture.

“Yes, of course.” You replied him. Honestly, you were surprised that he condescended to talk to you.

“I think it will be better if we can talk alone. Would it be okay for you to go out?”

“I'd like to go outside.”

Your father grunted angrily and intended to stop you but Miraz stopped him.

“We should let young lovers talk.”

When you were finally outside, Caspian stopped in the middle of the garden.

“Thank you for accepting my offer, Princess Y/N.” Caspian started to speak. “I know you do not want to get married with me. I totally understand that, we've just met and maybe you have someone else in your heart, or maybe you just do not like marriage.” He cleared his throat. “What I'm saying is although we both do not want this marriage; I think we should try to enjoy it. I do not expect you to love me and I can't love you suddenly but if we try to be friends, things may be easier and bearable. What do you think?”

You didn't like him, that was a fact, but his words offended you somehow. Especially when he said bearable, you felt very offended. Were you ugly or not enough for him? Were you a person who was annoying and unbearable? You didn't do anything wrong in the short time he saw you. Why did he use such words then?

“Yes, Prince Caspian, I do not want to get married to someone like you and I will do whatever it takes to stop this marriage.”

He seemed angry. “You cannot stop it now. They've already decided. We are getting married, no matter we like it or not.”

“I can stop it!” You raised your voice. “And I will!”

He rolled his eyes. “Could you stop your father when he first informed you about the marriage?”

Your answer was silence.

“That's what I thought.” He took a short breath. “I know you are angry and sad. I feel the same things. You are not the only one who is forced to marry. If we can respect each other and become friends, we can at least have a good time despite their evil intentions.”

“No,” Your voice shook. “I will stop my father. I will try harder.” When you felt your tears coming, you turned around and left Caspian there.

Caspian was sure that he hated you. Although it was the first time he saw you, he thought you were unbearable and about to turn his life into a nightmare.

.*･｡ﾟ ༘✧

It had been a month since you and your father left Miraz's castle. During this time, you kept fighting with your father and objecting this marriage but he was determined and strong.

He punished you, made you stay in the dungeons for a week, locked you in your room and let you out only when tailors came to prepare your wedding dress.

You felt nothing but unhappiness. Sometimes you weren't even there, people talked to you but you didn't hear. You were unhappy, sad and broken because you felt like nothing, no one. You opinions weren't important, your voice wasn't heard. You didn't want this marriage because your mother and father's marriage was also arranged and your mother suffered because of your father for her whole life. You were scared to have the same fate.

However, no matter how hard you tried, you couldn't stop your father and your wedding day came. You, your father and the maids travelled to Miraz's castle the night before the wedding.

The maids helped you get dressed, they did your hair, put some scent on your body, and you were ready to go.

Your father was with you during the ceremony. He escorted you until you arrived to the dais and Caspian held your hand.

Your dress was dark red; you noticed Caspian's cape was the same colour. He wore black trousers and boots, his shirt was also black.

You made your marriage vows but both of you kept it short and simple.

Caspian had managed to convince his uncle not to have a ball after the wedding. Miraz accepted because he didn't care about your wedding at all and he didn't want to deal with people.

When you were informed that there wouldn't be a ball last night, you were glad. You didn't want to want to dance with him and pretend to like him.

Therefore, after ceremony ended, Caspian and you went to your room. The place you would stay for the rest of your life. You hated every step you took and every single minute you walked. Caspian was holding your hand until you arrived to the room. It was a matter of form.

He opened the door and waited for you to go inside.

You were scared. What if he wanted to make... It? Would he hurt you if you said no? You had no weapon with you because your father made sure you didn't take any. You could fight with him with bare hands but what if he had a weapon? Your heart was beating so fast and your legs felt numb. You entered the room and just stood. You didn't know what to do.

But when you turned and looked at him as he closed the door, you realized he seemed nervous.

“So...” He said in a low voice. “We have to be here tonight, to make others believe in our marriage. Will you just sit and pout or would you like to talk with me? My books are there,” He pointed the right side of the room with his finger. “I mean if you like reading history.”

He was not going to hurt you. You took a short breath in relief. You felt all your muscles relaxing and that numb feeling leaving your body.

“I love history.” You replied him. You tried to sound friendly. He was right, you had to stay in the room until morning and maybe spending time with him wouldn't be so bad?

He took a step towards you, meanwhile you stepped back reflexively. He frowned.

“I know we do not know each other yet. The first thing I need you to know about me is I will never hurt you. I am not a violent person; you don't need to fear me.”

You just nodded.

“Is there anything you need me to know?”

“You should fear me.” You said and he laughed.

“Why?”

“I am an excellent fighter.” You were really proud of yourself. “There is no man I can't beat in a sword fight.”

“Oh, okay, Princess Y/N is fierce.” He had a smile on his face which made him look very friendly and warm. “Would you like to fight with me at dawn?”

“Of course.”

He extended his hand. You took and shook it. You looked at each other for a few minutes, without breaking the handshake.

“History,” You said when you realized you'd been holding his hand. “Books. Could you please show me your books?”

“Please,” He pulled the chair behind the desk for you. “Be my guest, Princess Y/N.”

You smiled as you sit.

“What do you like to read?”

“I read anything I find.” You replied. “But my favorite subjest is Narnia tales.”

He seemed suprised. “Do you know about them?”

“Of course I do. My mother used to tell me their stories. Kings and Queens of old, I am very fond of them.”

“Talking about Narnia is forbidden here.” Caspian said. “My uncle doesn't like Narnians.”

“So how do you know?”

“I have a professor. He teaches me. Wait a second.”

He turned his back to you and started to search something in his bookshelves. One wall of the room was used as a bookcase. He took a book from the back of the shelf. He brought the book and put it to the desk.

“May I sit?”

“Yes, yes please.” You moved a little when he sat to the chair next to yours.

He opened a page. “Here is one of their pictures.” He explained. His voice was confident and excited. You could tell how interested he was in Narnia. “This is High King Peter, this is King Edmund, this is Queen Susan and this is Queen Lucy.”

You nodded as you looked at the picture. “It is very beautiful.” You'd never seen their pictures before. “Do you know Mr. Tumnus?”

“No, I have never heard this name before.”

“Oh, he was an satyr and Queen Lucy's friend. They say when she first came to Narnia, Mr. Tumnus saw her and welcomed her in.”

“Who else do you know?”

And you talked about Narnia, Kings and Queens, fairytales, your favorite stories and heroes, what might have happened to Narnians. You chatted about yourselves too. Your childhood, your training stories, what you liked to do, what your favourite food was.

He wasn’t that bad, actually, he wasn’t bad at all. Communicating with him was easy, he was friendly and talkative. He smiled frequently and was always careful, never got closer to you before asking.

You thought maybe he was right after all. You were married now and neither he nor you could rise against your father or Miraz. Maybe things would be better if you started trying to be friends with him.

That's why you were nice to him whole night. You let him see the true you, the funny, nice, kind and lively you. And he liked that side of you. He hoped you'd never stop being like that because he hated to see you upset and broken. The day when you talked in the garden was a nightmare for him. You seemed so unhappy, so tired and upset and he felt the same things. The look inside your eyes broke his heart, which was already damaged.

Because when his uncle told him he'd get married, Caspian was so scared. He was too young to be married. He had dreams, wishes, and plans in his head. He was going to be a seafarer and search for Narnians. But this marriage would mean to stay inside of the kingdom and with his future wife. He hated that thought. However he still hoped his chosen wife would be someone easygoing so that even though he wouldn't love her, he could still have good time with her and try to make her happy.

That hope was destroyed by you when he tried to talk with you. He was disappointed and sure that his life would be a disaster from now on. He thought you'd make his life a torture for him.

Spending time with you, however, changed his thoughts. He realized you were nice and easygoing when you wanted to be. You were funny and very wise. Every story you told him and each new information you gave him about Narnians amazed him and he felt so glad that you knew and liked Narnia. He loved the way you told stories, with a big excitement and admiration, because he felt the same things when he talked about Narnian stories. Sharing his feelings with you made him feel so good.

You fell asleep after a while. The whole day was overwhelming and you were really tired, therefore you couldn't stop yourself.

Meanwhile Caspian was trying to find a book about astrology. When he finally found the book, he turned his face to the desk and saw you sleeping. Your arms were on the desk and you put your head on your arms. He couldn't help but smile. But then he realized he couldn't let you sleep on the desk. He put the book randomly to a shelf and approached to you silently.

“Y/N,” He told your name in a calm voice. “Princess Y/N, you should wake up.”

He tried to wake you up a few more times but you were in a deep sleep.

“Okay.” He muttered and sat next to you.

He couldn't sleep though. He sat there with you until you woke up at dawn. He read some books, thought about his day, and sometimes watched you.

He honestly felt happy because you two managed to be friends.

.*･｡ﾟ ༘✧

After three weeks had passed since the day you and Caspian got married, your public duties started. The first one was to visit the market place and observe the economic situation of the people and listen to their problems. You were really excited because you liked to talk with people and also you wanted to feel useful. Sitting inside the castle all day and spending most of your time with Caspian were getting boring.

Honestly, spending time with him was actually good. Waking up at dawn and fighting until you both were tired became your tradition. Caspian taught you how to use arrow and bow; in return, you taught him how to fight with a dagger. After fighting, you came to your room and took bath respectively. If there was any meeting, you and he participated together because Miraz demanded you to make this marriage seem believable, therefore outside of your room, you were always together. You had to hold hands sometimes but besides that, it was alright. When you spent time together in your room, you read, studied with Proffesor, just chatted together; you drew and he watched you, you watched him as he played the piano. At night, you slept in the same bed but you kept the distance.

However, all of those activities made you feel selfish because you were now the princess of Telmarines and your duty was to serve them and meet their needs.

When you finally arrived to the marketplace, you walked arm in arm. He was very thoughtful; he helped you with your dress, pulling it gently so that you didn’t step on it. He held your hand while you were getting out of your carriage.

You couldn’t tell if he was excited or not until he started talking with people. You saw that people loved him and he was very fond of them. He knew their names and he was so kind. He was very good at talking with children and he was so soft and cute with babies. He introduced you as his wife many times, which made you feel weird but somehow good.

He watched you as you talked with people. He was surprised because you were very nice to everyone. You were polite and your manners clearly showed that you cared about all of the people. Several women gave you flowers or something they cooked or baked. His eyes were on you as you ate food you were given and thanked and praised each woman. He’d seen princesses who didn’t even accept food from people. A boy wanted to give you a flower crown and you crouched down for him to put the crown on your head. Caspian found himself smiling while watching you. He realized you weren’t a person like he’d assumed. He let his prejudice form an opinion about you, which was something he shouldn’t have done. He judged you with your one and only mistake and realizing that made him feel very angry at himself.

He took a deep breath to get rid of his thoughts. He firstly needed to do his duty. Later, he could apologize to you.

You spent almost four hours in the market place, however neither of you realized how much time had passed when your driver and one of your guards (you insisted that you didn’t want them but you couldn’t stop Miraz) informed you about the time and told you it was time to leave.

Caspian and you discussed everything people told you, their problems, how to solve them, how to help people. The problem was actually very clear: They were sick of paying taxes as they knew their money was only spent for the armies of the lords who did nothing to help them.

As soon as you arrived to the castle, you went to Miraz’s room to discuss it with him. He was a strong lord and if you could get his support, others would probably listen to you.

Caspian was with you when you entered the room. He was right behind you but he was silent. He wanted you to be the one to solve this problem and win the hearts and minds of people.

However when you explain the situation to Miraz, he said ‘’No.’’ without hesitation. You were shocked because you really thought he would want to help you.

You frowned. ‘’How can you say no? They are our people, we must help them.’’

‘’Their taxes protect them.’’ Miraz looked very determined.

‘’There is no war at this moment. I think we can abate the taxes.’’

‘’Princess,’’ Miraz said in a insulting manner. ‘’You shouldn’t puzzle your brains with such problems. Go and do ordinary princess things. Comb your hair, sing, kiss your husband or whatever. This is not your business.’’

He made you angry, more than you can describe in words. You wished you could punch him but you managed to be calm somehow.

‘’My ordinary princess things are my actual responsibilities towards our people. And it is not your decision to make. It concerns all of the lords, therefore we will take it to the council.’’

‘’You will not.’’

You looked at his angry eyes with determination and stubbornness. ‘’You cannot patronize me. I have every right to discuss it with the council. Who do you think you are? The king?’’

He raised his hand against you however Caspian captured it before you or Miraz could do anything.

‘’Don’t even think about it, uncle.’’ He said in a low voice, gritting his teeth.

It was the first time you saw him angry and you could honestly say that he looked dangerous.

‘’She is right.’’ Caspian continued. ‘’We will take this to the council and you are not the king, you cannot stop me or her. The council will decide what to do.’’

He let go of Miraz’s hand but his face didn’t change. ‘’You wanted to bring her to this castle and make her our princess. You have to respect everything she says and does because like it or not, she is our princess and I think what she is doing is amazing and very right.’’

After hearing Caspian’s talking in that tone and manner, you understood why he was a prince and the next king. At that moment, he was not just a young and inexperienced prince, he was a strong king and he knew how to rule a kingdom, in that case, people. He was made to be king and realizing this made you feel proud of him. You also appreciated him and how he stood up for you.

‘’Come.’’ He said to you and together, you left the room. Caspian directly went to the council room and demanded a meeting.

You explained the situation and needs of the people. Caspian supported you and made sure that everyone knew that you weren’t alone. Some of the lords didn’t want to abate the taxes while some of them supported you.

It was debated in the council for two days, you and Caspian never gave up the cause. At the end of the second day, lords announced that they agreed to abate the taxes and spend their economic sources to help and support the people. General Glozelle supported you extremely. You thought he supported you just to annoy Miraz but you were still thankful.

You and he were in your room after everything was over. You felt really tired after talking, discussing and arguing for two days but the satisfaction of beating Miraz was worth it.

‘’Princess Y/N,’’ Caspian said. ‘’I really appreciate what you achieved. My uncle doesn’t even let his wife to be a council member but you defeated him very elegantly and successfully.’’

You smiled at his compliments. ‘’Thank you,’’ You said. ‘’But I think I would lose without your help. Thank you for standing up for me and your support.’’

‘’With such a determination like yours, I think you would beat my uncle and council without me.’’

You smiled proudly. ‘’Thanks. My father says I got it from my mother.’’

‘’May I?’’ He asked as he stood up close to the bed.

‘’Yes, please.’’ You made room for him. ‘’And you don’t have ask every time. Also you can call me just Y/N. You don’t need to add princess.’’

‘’Oh, so, are you starting to like me, Y/N?’’ He asked jokingly.

‘’I thought we became friends.’’ You looked at him. ‘’Didn’t we?’’

‘’Yes, yes we did. We are friends.’’ His voice was low and he wasn’t looking at you.

‘’Is there any problem?’’ You felt worried. Had you done something wrong?

‘’No, just...’’ He breathed out as he rubbed his nasal bridge. ‘’Yes, there is a problem and you’ll hate me when I tell you.’’

‘’I won’t hate you.’’ You got closer to him. ‘’I know I was really rude to you at first but believe me, it changed. Please tell me. I’m sure we can solve the problem together.’’

‘’I tried really hard not to do this but I couldn’t stop myself. How could I? You know about Narnians, you love history as much as I do, you are an amazing fighter, you are brilliant, lovely, caring and very stubborn.’’

You were confused. Yes, you were flattered but what did his words mean?

‘’Caspian-‘’

‘’I like you. Not as a friend. As a... When I introduce you as my wife to people, I feel good.’’

You couldn’t say anything. The only thing you did was to give a short and shaky breath. You were totally shocked because you never thought he’d like you. You had been mean to him and you were distant. Honestly, you thought he hated you or didn’t like you. You assumed he was just trying to be nice and was putting up with you. But his words vanished all of your prejudices because he sounded very sincere and serious. The way he complemented you and the last thing he said... You felt good, that was for sure, but you didn’t know how you felt about him. Did you like him? You’d never considered this, maybe because you were determined not to like him or maybe because you were sure he wouldn’t like you.

‘’Caspian, I really don’t know what to say. But I don’t hate you, I never did and I never will. You’ve been so good to me, more than I deserve. You are so nice, kind, thoughtful and caring. I am really thankful to you. However I am not sure about my feelings. I never thought we would like each other.’’

He nodded silently. ‘’It’s alright.’’ He said. ‘’I don’t and can’t expect you to like me suddenly.’’

‘’It’s not because you are an unlikable person.’’ He looked at you as you continued. ‘’It’s because I was sure that you would never like me.’’

‘’So... What will happen now?’’

You smiled at him. It was a warm and sincere smile. ‘’We will see.’’

.*･｡ﾟ ༘✧

‘’I’m beginning to think you are doing magic.’’ Caspian said while he was looking at the second arrow you shot which pierced the little red circle on the target board.

You laughed. ‘’I wish I could but, no, it is the result of practicing too much.’’

He took the arrows from the board and brought them to you.

‘’You’ve improved so much. I feel very unneeded while I’m standing here.’’

‘’I think you should be proud. You are my teacher after all.’’

‘’You are a brilliant student.’’ He said, smiling. ‘’However, I think if put your leg like this,’’ He put his right leg a bit further than where yours were. ‘’It will be better.’’

You did as he told. ‘’Is it okay?’’

‘’Yes, and you should raise your arm higher.’’

You did that too.

‘’Just a little- Can I show you?’’

‘’Yes of course.’’

‘’Okay, now,’’ He took a step towards your back. ‘’Your elbow should be like this,’’ He spoke while he put his hand to your elbow and pushed it up softly. ‘’And it would be better if your arm,’’ His hand were on your arm now, his touch was so gentle. You felt that his fingertips were burning part of your skin which wasn’t covered with arm-guard.

You tried to ignore his touch and focus on what he was telling but you failed. You felt like a candle slowly melting because of the fire. You woke up to the fact that you wanted to melt. For him.

‘’Y/N,’’ You finally heard his voice. ‘’Are you alright?’’

‘’Yes, I am.’’ You took a short breath and lowered your hands and bow. ‘’I’m sorry, I just...’’ You turned your head back and looked at his face. ‘’Can I ask you something?’’

‘’You can.’’

He looked very worried and you loved it. He was very caring during all this time you spent together. He was also so thoughtful. Whenever you frowned a little, he immediately asked if you were okay. He always made sure that there was water on your night table. He always helped you when your dress caused you problems.

‘’Do you still like me, Caspian?’’ You asked very nervously.

He licked his lips before talking. ‘’Yes, I do. More and more day by day, actually.’’

You smiled when you heard his answer. ‘’Then, I have some news for you.’’

He raised his eyebrows, there was a little smile on his face. ‘’I am listening very carefully.’’

‘’Prince Caspian,’’ You said and took a deep breath. ‘’I think I like you.’’

His smile got bigger and bigger and you heard him laughing. ‘’Really?’’

You nodded. You were smiling too. Saying your feelings out and loud made you feel very relaxed, as if a heavy burden was taken off your chest.

‘’How?’’ He asked.

‘’Am I supposed to give you an alphabetic list?’’ You shrugged your shoulders. ‘’It just happened but I think it was inevitable.’’

His dark brown eyes were shining. ‘’It feels like I am in a dream.’’

‘’Does it mean you dream about me?’’ You asked jokingly.

You realized he was taking you into your arms. You let him because you needed to be in his arms, feel his touch and body heat.

‘’Sometimes.’’ He said. ‘’Don’t you?’’

‘’Sometimes.’’ You copied him. It made him laugh.

‘’Can I kiss you right now, Princess Y/N?’’

‘’Yes, yes you can, Prince Caspian.’’

You dropped the bow when his lips touched yours. All of your muscles relaxed, you felt like you would fall to the ground but thankfully his hands were on your waist, holding you tight.

His lips were soft, his kiss was passionate. You could almost taste his desire and you absolutely loved it. Being loved and wanted by him felt like you were over the moon.

He was the one to break the kiss and look at your face very carefully. He liked it when he saw your red lips.

He was looking at you carefully, as if he was trying to understand whether you were real or not. You noticed that he really couldn’t believe you liked him.

‘’I like you.’’ You needed to say it again so that he could believe.

He took your hands into his and brought them closer to his lips, then kissed your hands. You bit your lower lip, it was your soft spot.

‘’I like you too, so much.’’ He managed to say before you grabbed his face and kissed him.

#prince caspian #prince caspian fic #prince caspian imagine #prince caspian x reader #Caspian #caspian x reader #caspian imagine #narnia #The Chronicles of Narnia #TheChroniclesOfNarnia #narnia fanfiction #NARNIA FIC

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hotchley · 3 years

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lauren: aaron and emily

Yeah so for something that is meant to be a conversation, there’s a surprising lack of her speaking but honestly, this was so much fun to write. I forgot how angsty Hotchniss could be like DAMN

This is my take on what happened at her bedside before they moved her, and is dedicated to everyone who said they would read it because without you guys, I probably wouldn’t have actually written it so thank you so much!

Trigger Warnings: serious medical injuries, references to abortion, implied/referenced child abuse, religious themes

read on ao3!

“You could’ve told me,” he tells her, even though she can’t hear him. Her eyes are closed. If it wasn’t for the rise and fall of her chest- so faint it almost isn’t there- he would believe she was dead.

And in some ways, she is.

To the team, Emily Prentiss is gone. Just another victim of a dangerous serial killer with a vendetta. To the children that love her- Jack, Henry, even Carrie, who she still spoke to once a week- she will be in heaven. With Haley. To Aaron and Jennifer, she will be hiding. Alone and weak but safe.

Safe. He wants to laugh at that. How can she be safe when everyone she loved is being torn from her? When Ian Doyle is still alive?

He doesn't want to be the one to tell her she was dead. He doesn't want to be the one to tell her that she had to go to Paris- the one place that had never been touched by the bloody hands of murder and pain- until they found Doyle. If they ever do find him. He doesn't want to let her go.

He wants to bury his head in her hair, inhaling the familiar smell of her shampoo that had always felt like the safety he craved but could never hold onto and pretend the sea wasn't pulling him under, cutting off his breathing as he struggled to stay afloat. He wants to hold her, hearing the steady and strong beat of her heart that reminds him of the reason for doing all of this. He wants to feel her hands- so warm and soft- against his stomach as she draws on his ribs so he can look in the mirror and see her, not George Foyet.

He wants so much. But there is a reason he is the Unit Chief. There is a reason he is in the room with her whilst JJ comforts a crying Reid. There is a reason that when the team thinks of Mom, they think of him. Not Rossi. Certainly not Gideon.

He does the difficult jobs. He does the things that need to be done but nobody else wants to. He cleans the blood off walls and stands guard at hospital beds. He pulls them away from dead bodies and witnesses their anger and sadness. He takes their insults and cradles them when they cry. He pretends he isn't human so they can believe they didn't hurt him.

He does the difficult jobs because he brought all of them into a life of loss and pain, and in his opinion, it is a small price to pay. It is less than what he deserves to do. It isn't enough to make up for everything he has caused them to see but it is a start.

When Emily leaves- and JJ will go to Paris with her, no matter how much she may say he should go instead- he will carry out their grief assessments. He will let them look at him with pain and hurt and anger and sadness and ask him what the point is. As they ask him why they are alive.

And then he will run. Because they will find Ian Doyle, and when they do, Emily Prentiss will return. They will hate him, and he will be a coward. He will take a job elsewhere and let them repair their lives, rebuild their home, without him.

But until that day comes, he will sit by Emily's bed, holding her hand, limp and cold, and pray for her to wake up. He hasn't prayed since he was a child. And even then, he didn't really believe in God. But desperate people will do anything. And although he was calm and collected before the committee that decided Emily's fate, he is desperate for her to just wake up.

So he will atone for his sins and take whatever punishment is deemed appropriate. He will let her go and never inhale her perfume again, if only so she is able to open her eyes.

"You could've told me," he repeats, thinking about the last woman he said those words too. But that had been different. JJ wasn't Emily. "I could've helped you. You could've trusted me with this. And I know it isn't about me. It's about you. But I'm selfish, Emily Prentiss. I'm selfish and I don't want to let you go but I have to."

He doesn't know how to. He doesn't know what he's meant to say when she wakes up and only sees him. JJ had looked at him when she said Emily never made it off the table. It was a single glance, but he'd understood. He had walked away from the team. Refused to let his tears fall.

And then he had looked the committee in the eye and told them he had no emotional attachment to her case. He had lied. And Emily had, in their words, been saved. He didn't believe it was saving her. He believed it was keeping her alive so one day, she could come home and live a better life.

The woman on that bed is not his Emily. It is not the Emily he loves, or the Emily that told him he wasn't alone. It's not the Emily that dances around the kitchen with Jack, or the Emily that refuses to flinch when he has nightmares. The Emily that never walked away from him until that one fateful day.

He should have known something was wrong then. And if not then, when she was late twice in the same week. But he had been so blinded by his own hurt and anger and betrayal that he refused to comment. Secretly, vindictively, he had hoped that her lateness was being caused by her own pain. That she was trying to avoid him.

Now he realises that he was right. She was trying to avoid him. Because he knew her. And if she saw him properly, she would crack. And in the same way he had been determined to find Foyet alone, without anyone else going down with him, she had been determined to find Doyle alone.

But Foyet had still killed Haley. And Doyle had technically killed her. In some ways, he had killed the team too. He didn't know how to bring up Spencer's migraines with him, but Emily had been his confidant. What was going to happen now? How is Derek supposed to move past being told to let her go?

The doctors had told him to get some rest and to go home, but he can't. Jack is still with Jessica, and his apartment is still littered with scraps of her. He hadn't moved anything after that night. He had thought it was strange when she didn't ask for any of it. Now he knows why. She had bigger things going on.

He told Clyde Easter that it would be his fault if something happened to her. Because he needed someone else to blame. He needed to believe that he was a good man that had done what he could. But he hadn't. Rational thought told him that just like with everyone else, he couldn't force her to tell him the truth or accept his help.

The part of him that was still helplessly in love with her told him that he could have. Should have. But he hadn't. So now he was sitting there, watching the heart monitor, convincing himself she was alive. Bracing himself for the moment she woke up.

He still doesn't know what he's meant to say.

"I was so angry at you then. After everything we had gone through, I didn't understand why you were just so willing to throw it all away. You had told me you would never leave, and you just left me there, in the home we had finally started to build. But I get it now. And I am sorry. I am so, so sorry that I wasn't enough and that I didn't do more and-"

"Aaron," she whispered. Her eyes had fluttered open moments after he'd started speaking, but she hadn't been ready to confront the world. He needed to get the words out. He needed a moment to be Aaron before he morphed back into Hotch.

She has no right to his name. Not now. Not after everything she has put him through. Not after she left him on his knees, a ring so different from the one Ian had tried to give her that still symbolised the exact same thing, with tears in his eyes as she pretended he was nothing in order to protect him.

But she needed him. She was cold, and her stomach hurt, and she didn't know where she was. She didn't understand why it was so dark, or why only he was there, apologising. The team should have been waiting. He should have been smiling, looking slightly disapproving. Not crying. He wouldn't risk any of the team seeing him like that.

He looks up. "Emily," he whispers, pouring every inch of his heart into that single word. But as he says it, he is looking at her hairline. Not her eyes. He knows that if he looks at her eyes, he will crumble. And now she is awake, he cannot let himself do that.

He forgets that Emily knows everything about him. She knows the optimum temperature for his baths. She knows the way he takes his coffee, the fact that he hates two-in-one shampoo and conditioner but keeps it in his go bag for ease. She knows which nightmares lead to a cold shower that chills him to the bone and reminds him of his own fragility.

She knows that his own humanity terrifies him. She knows how he shuts down and avoids everything when it gets too overwhelming, which is how she knows whatever has happened is bad. Worse than bad.

"Where is everyone?" she asks, shocked by the weakness of her voice.

He doesn't reply. He knows that he needs to. That with every moment that passes, she comes up with another scenario. But he didn't need to tell the team that she never made it off the table. Until now, he has been able to pretend that none of this is even happening. That when she opened her eyes, he would guide the others down to her room.

That when they discharged her from the hospital, he would take her to his apartment, Jack's toys strewn across the living room and the carpet, which if you looked at it from just the right angle would see had been changed in one area.

"Hotch," she whispers.

He closes his eyes for a few seconds. When he opens them, there is no warmth behind his stare. He still won't meet her eyes, and she feels herself begin to panic. His biggest tell is when he refuses to look at someone.

"They believe you're dead," he says, voice completely monotone as he fights a wave of emotion.

"Then why haven't you gone and told them that I'm not?" she asks, already terrified of the answer.

He looks down. "Emily, I'm so sorry. I am so, so sorry. You don't need to forgive me, but I need you to know that there was no other way to keep you safe. I tried. I tried so hard, but there was no other way-" he inhaled, snatching his hand back the moment she tried to hold it.

It hurt, more than anything that had happened over the past weeks, to see how he did not trust her. Not anymore.

"I always said that the only person that wouldn't forgive you is yourself. And I stand by that. So tell me the truth. Please Aaron. Just tell me what happened because I can't remember and it is terrifying, and you know what it is like. Please," she whispered. She tried, once more, to take his hand, but she was too weak.

He did not know what it was like to not remember what had happened. He remembered everything Foyet had done to him, from the first time the knife had touched his skin to the moment he had lost consciousness. He had never told her that. He probably never would.

"It's to keep you safe," he said, trying to find the words to explain what had happened. But like the ability to save the people he loved, they evaded him.

"Safe," she repeated. Like she didn't know what the word meant anymore. Maybe she didn't. Maybe she never had. There had been a time where his arms were the safest place she could find herself, but the man sitting in front of her was not the one that had held her at night.

The man sitting in front of her was a coward.

He flinches at her tone. It's been so long since she's spoken to him like that- snapping her words and rolling her eyes- that he's forgotten what it felt like. He wonders how. Her words always managed to meet their mark.

"Yes Em." The Em slips out without meaning to. He doesn't get to call her Em anymore. "Safe."

"Ian Doyle has murdered every single person on that team apart from Clyde Easter. Explain to me how I'm going to be safe."

"He's going to believe you're dead," he says, too quietly for her to hear. He says it to himself because he too needs to believe she's dead. In some ways, she is because she'll never be the woman she was before, and it's all his fault.

She frowns, the words not quite processing as her head still hurts from the painkillers. All she can say to him is: "What?"

She deserves more than what he can give. So he ignores his own shattered heart, and finally, finally meets her eyes. His own pain and anguish is reflected in hers. She almost looks away because she cannot handle his humanity. Almost. Her desire to prove she is better than he believes wins out, so she carries on staring.

"Ian Doyle hurt you. Badly. So-" he pauses again. Desperately tries to find that neutrality he had always stressed the importance of. He fails, because just like with Foyet, this isn't just a victim of a heinous crime. It's the woman that holds whatever pieces of his heart that still exist this time. Even as she had walked away, leaving him on his knees, he knew he would never stop loving her.

"So what, Aaron?" she presses, sounding angry.

It scares him, her anger. Everyone's anger scares him. He hates it, hates that his father still holds that kind of grip on him and his mind, but the moment someone seems angry he feels himself shutting down and becoming smaller. Drifting away to a fictional world where nobody cries and he's safe.

He doesn't deserve to shut down now.

"Everyone thinks you're dead because that's what we've told them. And they will think you're dead until we find Ian Doyle and-" he doesn't finish his sentence. Ian Doyle needs to die before Emily can come home to him and the team. But if he tells her that, she will realise he is not the good man she believes him to be. He is just one misstep away from becoming an unsub they cannot find.

"They think I'm dead," she says, tears in her eyes as all the pain she has been repressing since the first sign of Ian's return suddenly makes itself known. She doesn't feel anything physically- the sedatives are working- but it feels like her heart is being ripped from her chest.

For a moment, she wonders if Aaron felt like this when Haley died.

"I'm sorry," he says, again. It's what his vocabulary has been reduced to. He doesn't know how to put everything he wants to say into words. He doesn't know what the point in doing that is, because it won't change anything.

JJ is taking her to Paris. She deserves that. She needs that. She needs to see something good. He doesn't deserve to see Emily smiling and healing enough to travel. He deserves the anger and hatred of the team. He already knows that when it's time for them to know, he will tell them how it was him.

"You're sorry."

"Emily, please, I am trying to keep you safe, so just let me tell you what's going to happen. When the doctor gets here, they're moving you somewhere out of state, and as soon as you're strong enough, JJ will go with you. Paris, I think. She'll be your point of contact." It comes out in all one breath because if he stops he won't be able to start again.

"Are you?"

"Am I?"

"Are you really trying to keep me safe, or is this about you? Because I told Derek to let me go. I told him to let me go because Ian won't stop coming after people until I am dead. He broke out of a prison that should've held ten of him. He murdered every single person from that operation apart from Clyde Easter."

She's hurting. She's angry and hurt numb and upset and still so in love with him, but she can't hold back. Not now. She has to let go of everything and everyone she has ever cared about, and although rationally she knows it isn't his fault- it's Doyle's- she can't shout at Doyle. She can shout at Aaron though.

"Emily," he pleads, closing his eyes.

"You should've let me die," she spits. "You should have let me die because then this whole thing would be over. Ian would've got what he wanted and nobody else would be getting hurt. He'll work out I'm not dead. He will. And then the next person he kills, their blood will be on your hands."

He knows she doesn’t mean it. He knows that. It doesn’t stop him from looking at her face, at the mouth that had always felt like a firework against his own and wondering how she manages to do this to him.

“Stop,” he begs. He can’t take much more.

“Just like Haley’s,” she says before she can stop herself.

Those three words make his heart shatter all over again.

Time seems to slow down. Her own words register in her mind and her jaw drops. She presses one trembling fist to her mouth, forcing the apology down. She can't give it to him right now. He won't accept it. The other traitorously reaches out for his hand, still resting on the blanket.

He had turned away the moment she said Haley's name. When he looks at her again, eyes read and cheeks damp, his mouth is forming the word why, but no sound is coming out. He's frozen, hands trembling and there is nothing she can do to cure his pain.

There are no words she can whisper. No medication she can count out for him. No stories of her childhood that she can distract him. There is nothing she can do because this time, it was not a serial killer scarring his stomach so every time he looked in the mirror he would see them. It was not a man that should never have had children causing him to look at her and ask what he had been thinking.

It had been her. That was the problem with profilers. They always knew where to strike. The difference was, he was too afraid to do it. She was too angry to not.

The worst part is, he doesn't reply. He doesn't say a single word, because in his head, it is what he deserves. It is what everyone has been thinking since the day of the funeral. The difference with her is that she does not hesitate to say what she thinks.

It used to make him smile. In this moment, it breaks him.

He moves from the chair. He's done his duty. And if he looks at her, he think will say something he doesn't mean. Something cruel. Something about her own issues- about how she doesn't trust him, how she is so afraid of commitment she would let the only good thing she's ever let herself have go.

She knows that he won't. He's too good. Too afraid. It's why, before she can overthink it, she whispers one word: "Stay."

He's still close enough to hear her. She watches as slight relief, then pained love, and finally a forced and cold neutrality that she has always hated because it means people don't get to see how beautiful and painful his humanity is.

Nothing he does will ever be enough for this. He will never deserve her forgiveness. The final decision was out of his hands, but if he had just fought a little bit harder, then he could have told the team and they would be able to share the burden. He will never be good enough for her. The darkness she has carried with her since that day in Italy, even though she understands now that she too was just a child faced with an impossible decision, will never compare to his.

Her darkness was part of her beauty. His got people killed. Her, laying on that bed, is just another piece of proof. He cannot give her what she deserves, but he can give her what she wants.

And so, he stays.

Nothing she says will ever make up for those words that now feel like copper in her mouth. She will never deserve the feel of his calloused hands- some from the horrors of his childhood, others from the guitar he loved to play so much- in her own. If she had just been quicker, less of a survivor then he would be able to mourn her death instead of hiding the truth. She will never be good enough for him. The darkness he has carried with him since he was a child, a darkness that should have never been created, will never compare to hers.

His darkness is part of his humanity. Hers got people hurt. Him, heart once more in tattered shreds because of her, is just another piece of proof. She cannot give him what he deserves, but she can give him what he needs.

And so, she reaches out for him.

She takes his hands that are not coated with Haley's blood, no matter what he believes and holds them tightly. He lets her, even though every part of him screams to let go. Haley's body was cold the last time he held her. He does not want to remember Emily as this cold and fragile girl.

But he will not take her to Paris. JJ had to stand there as they fought to keep her alive because he was frantically trying to convince people that cared more about politics than they did about real lives. She needs it.

He won't survive without it, but maybe that is for the best.

They sit like that, hands clasped in some pathetic recreation of the long nights and days they had spent together.

When the doctors came to take her away, somewhere where he could not follow, the full extent of what was about to happen hit her.

"Aaron, I-"

don't blame you, need you to come with me, want you to forgive yourself, regret saying no, trust you with everything I am, think you are the best man I know, didn't mean what I said-

"I love you."

"Emily, you-"

don't need to lie, are so much more than you give yourself credit for, are one of the most beautiful women I have ever met, cannot regret saying no, were right about Haley, were right about everything-

"You shouldn't have said that."

She knows that. But she needed to say it in place of all the things she could never find the words for.

"Be happy for me," she says, right before the doors close.

"I'll try," he whispers, to an empty and cold room.

He doesn't. He runs instead, like the coward she accused him of being.

#criminal minds #criminal minds fanfic #hotchniss #aaron hotchner #emily prentiss #sad aaron hotchner #sad emily prentiss #hurt emily prentiss #hurt aaron hotchner #tw implied child abuse #tw religious themes #tw abortion mention #sumayyah writes cm

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illuminatedquill · 3 years

Text

Nevertheless, Episode 9 (Preview)

Na Bi’s Choice

It’s almost time.

This will be my last post until after the latest episode drops, I think. I have no more to say; no more speculation to offer. I am actually still undecided as to whether I’m going to watch it tomorrow or binge it with the final episode next week. We’ll see.

So! I am here to offer a recap and a run down of where Na Bi has been and where, maybe, she’s going in this next episode based on everything I’ve seen so far. This is my opinion and if yours differs, I would love to hear about it.

Let’s do a recap:

Na Bi is, somewhat unsuccessfully, trying to move on from her relationship with Park Jae Un. In episode 8, we have two confessions (well, three, but Soljiwan don’t deserve to be a part of this angsty mess): one from Yang Do Hyeok, Na Bi’s childhood best friend, and one from Park Jae Un, local asshole.

Na Bi seems now aware of how messy her personal life is and has decided that now is not the best time to be dating. She turns down Do Hyeok, who only reassures and comforts her that it’s fine; he still likes her no matter what. Do Hyeok, best boy that he is, decides to respect her decision and give her the space she needs to choose what is best for herself.

Jae Un, asshole that he is, hasn’t gotten the memo that Na Bi desires an end to their drama and continues to invade her personal space and cross boundaries where he isn’t wanted. He does his own version of a confession and drops a hefty piece of info: that he was present at the night when Na Bi’s ex revealed his erotic sculpture of her and saw it all went down. He further reveals that he fell in love with her at first sight there.

Na Bi, thankfully, isn’t impressed.

(Not sure if the show is going to expand further on this info but we’ll see.)

At the end of episode 8, it’s evident that Jae Un is increasingly desperate to keep Na Bi by his side. He stalks her to the alleyway where they first talked all those episodes ago and drops that dumbass one liner about butterflies again.

And that’s where we left off.

Let’s break down Na Bi’s choices next. I’m not going to say how likely any of them are to happen; it’s all up in the air.

It’s Na Bi. We won’t know until she says it.

First off:

Park Jae Un

Let’s talk about it. Chemistry and attraction seem to reign supreme in Nevertheless and his case seems to be further bolstered by the fact that Na Bi seems unable to shut him out permanently (at this point, I’m not sure what exactly would be her breaking point with him). Yes, the two have evident feelings for each other but I’m feeling it more from him, rather than Na Bi.

The tables have certainly turned in this latter half of the drama: now Jae Un is the one desperately in love, whereas Na Bi is not willing to reciprocate. His gestures and advances of “sincerity” towards her come off as entirely self serving; I feel like he enjoys the feeling of being in love with her rather than actually being present in the relationship. It’s one thing to love someone; it’s another thing entirely to put in the work to make the relationship sustainable. And I have yet to see anything from either Jae Un or Na Bi that tells me that they could be a viable couple in the long run.

Also, Na Bi’s decision (if she sticks to it, which I hope she does) to not date anyone currently might have closed the door on this couple already: Jae Un clearly wants to date Na Bi now. There’s an interesting (and increasingly plausible) scenario that could arise from this:

Na Bi gives in and admits her feelings to him but still rejects him because they need to sort themselves out. Jae Un, impatient and wanting nothing short of a hard ‘yes’, takes this as a total rejection and leaves for America. Na Bi is heart broken once again but moves on. They meet again after he returns and it’s up to the viewer to interpret whether or not they give it a second chance.

Here are the factors that work in Jae Un’s favor: first, that damn explosive attraction he has with Na Bi. Although I think it’s wearing off by episode 8, it’s still a potent force. And the fact that Na Bi still has lingering thoughts and feelings towards him also speaks that she isn’t done with him, much to her dismay. Yes, she’s angry, suspicious, sad with him but if she really didn’t care she wouldn’t feel anything at all. And, despite Na Bi’s better judgment, we know he’s the one she keeps turning to.

Other factors? He’s the fucking main lead. Rarely do kdramas have the girl end up with anyone other than the main lead. Our best boy Do Hyeok isn’t even listed as a second lead. So, that’s something to take into consideration.

But don’t count Do Hyeok out just yet. Let’s talk about him.

Yang Do Hyeok

Best boy. One of three reasons why most of us are watching this mess (the other two being Soljiwan). Do Hyeok, despite all the factors previously mentioned working in favor for Jae Un, continues to represent a strong rival and possible endgame for Na Bi. So, let’s talk about him.

Nevertheless makes the strong case for Jae Un and his type of love but it also makes a strong case for Do Hyeok. He was a bright, yet brief presence in the webtoon and his screen time in the drama has definitely been extended to showcase even more of that sweet, charming smile of his.

I’ve written in a previous post about why Do Hyeok and Na Bi make sense and why their relationship is already so good even though they’re not dating but I’ll simplify for you all here: it’s based on an even playing field and has a strong foundation of friendship already present. Do Hyeok doesn’t leave Na Bi in any doubts about how feels about her; he comforts her when she’s feeling down even after she rejected him; he is attentive and cares for her deeply. And, also, she trusts him implicitly in a way she doesn’t with Jae Un. He makes her smile the most like no one else does. With him, Na Bi is unapologetically happy and carefree that she hasn’t been in a long time.

Do Hyeok’s only flaw is that he has epically bad timing. Which, unfortunately, matters a lot in relationships.

The feelings Na Bi has for Do Hyeok have been complicated by his confession but, in a rare moment of clarity (again something she doesn’t have with Jae Un who only confuses her), she turns him down in order to protect him from herself. So, yes, Do Hyeok is still the childhood best friend but only because Na Bi is keeping him safe. She doesn’t want to disappoint him.

One factor working in Do Hyeok’s favors: he’s still in the drama, for one. Seol-a, Jae Un’s ex, has been absent since episode five (although she’s making her grand return in this next episode). If the show was really done with Do Hyeok, it would have been a done deal by now (well, we’ll see what happens in episode 9) but it tells me that there’s still a plan for him. He’s not merely a distraction or being used for character progression for Na Bi and Jae Un.

The biggest thing going for Do Hyeok right now? He and Na Bi are endgame in the webtoon. There’s been plenty of talk about how they’ve made changes to differentiate the drama from the webtoon but I’ve been talking with others who have read the webtoon and we are in agreement: the changes, while substantial, have been to the characters and not so much the overall narrative. I’m not saying the ending will be exactly the same but I do think it will hit the same beats just in a different, healthier and happy way.

My scenario for Do Hyeok and Na Bi is that she makes the choice to finally ditch Jae Un for good but doesn’t commit to Do Hyeok immediately. She might stay friends with him after asking him to wait for her. We’ll see the set up and consummation for that in episode 10.

(However, since Nevertheless is entirely driven by the characters and their choices you could make the argument that those character changes are enough to warrant a different ending. So, take that as you will.)

Despite all the positive things I have to say about Na Bi and Do Hyeok, I have to stress that nothing is guaranteed here. The preview promises nothing but more pain and angst between Na Bi, Do Hyeok, and Jae Un. That’s the only certainty.

Well. There’s one more certainty. At least, I hope. In fact, it’s the most obvious and clear choice that Na Bi should be making in episode 9 and the one I hope the writers are gearing towards. It’s the only outcome any of us should care about, really.

Yu Na Bi

Yes, you read that right.

This is the only endgame we should really give a shit about. That Yu Na Bi chooses herself, her well being, her happiness, over anything else. Jae Un vs Do Hyeok - it’s not important and never really should have been.

Yes, we can all differ on the opinion of which of these two guys can best help her achieve this but Na Bi really needs to stand on her own to achieve this. Happiness has to come from within; she needs to fix what’s broken inside before she can be in a good relationship.

Na Bi needs to love herself first before anyone else. She deserves that so much. I want that before anything else and if she can get that, I will forgive the writers for all the BS they’ve put us through. And even if she chooses Jae Un. I’ll be happy for her and wishing her well.

(Although, again, Do Hyeok is the only one who gets that she needs to figure this out for herself, BUT it’s still Na Bi’s choice. It’s not that Do Hyeok deserves Na Bi, but she deserves someone sweet and good like Do Hyeok in her life.)

Best of luck to us all, Na Bi, and Do Hyeok tomorrow. It’s the beginning of the end. We’re almost there. Let’s wish them all happy endings.

I’ll leave you all this as the mind set you should have going into episode 9:

#jtbc nevertheless #nevertheless #kdrama #han so hee #chae jong hyeop #song kang #yu na bi #yang do hyeok #park jae eon

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with-love-anu · 4 years

Text

I don’t like you

Pairing: James Potter x Slytherin!Reader

Summary: James and you hate each other and have the biggest prank war

Warnings: Swearing, pranks.

Word Count: 2,718

You let out a groan, squeezing your nose shut at the smell of dung bombs. Coughing, you rushed out of the room and the Slytherin dorms seeing a familiar messy black haired boy run away laughing. Your eyes pricked with tears at the awful smell and your throat felt raw. You saw your friends run out too. Taking in a deep breath, you tried to control yourself. You were done, so freaking done. This was the third time the same week that Potter and the elder Black brother had pranked you all. Except they weren’t funny anymore. That’s what pranks are supposed to be, right? Something you could laugh and enjoy at? You looked at Elodie clenching her eyes shut at the sensation. You had a plan. You knew it was crazy. But when did that ever stop you? You had never talked to James. But it was very much clear that he did not like the Slytherins. Not even a bit.

***

James woke up with a groan, smelling something flowery all around him. He yawed, ignoring the strange smell, getting up. He had transfiguration, charms and astronomy that day. Thankfully nothing with the snakes. He got out of the shower, opening his wardrobe for clothes seeing Sirius groggily go into the bathroom. Remus was asleep, that owl. Always last minute yet, never late. His eyes widened and he blinked. Everything was green? He took out all his clothes haphazardly, panicking on seeing them all dark green with silver accents. A note fell down at his feet and he picked it up with a frown.

“Dearest Marauders,

Take this beautiful gift of green robes from me. I know not all of you deserved this, but then again, didn’t feel like anyone of you should be left behind. I know how much you love us, Slytherins. Why not showcase it?

With love,

(Y/n) (Y/l/n)”

“SIRIUS!!! Remus!!!” he called out.

“What?” snapped Sirius from the washroom and Remus didn’t even move from his bed just letting out a grunt in response.

“Sirius get your ass here! And Remus wake up or I’ll kick you” he said stalking towards the bathroom as Sirius came out with a toothbrush in his hand. James shoved the letter to his face as he started reading aloud, eyes widening with word. Remus got up suddenly looking at his friends with wide eyes, rushing to his own wardrobe groaning on looking at the vivid green colours and the strong stench of flowers. Sirius however, started crackling.

“WHAT?” James bellowed.

“Well, the sarcasm is…” He snorted before he saw James frown. James shook his head as Remus glared at them both.

“This. Has. A. Strong. One. Week. Dye. It wouldn’t remove before the expected time. Why should I suffer for all the things you two do?”

“And I am not suffering?” James quipped back as Remus just shook his head, huffing and went back to his bed. James looked at Sirius who didn’t look worried at all.

“Aren’t you worried?” James asked, as Sirius shrugged.

“I look great in everything.” He said making James want to punch him.

He dressed up quickly, dashing out of the dorm towards the great hall. Ignoring the looks of the students around and the snickers he looked for you amidst the Slytherin table. He stalked towards you as you finally noticed him.

“(Y/n) why the hell did you do this?”

“Now, that’s not a way to talk about the gift I gave you. I worked hard, you know?” you said batting your eyelashes as he scowled at you.

“You. Slytherins. Are. The. Best. Thing. To. Walk. On. This. Planet.” He shouted as his eyes widened. He put his hands over his mouth as people around you looked at him.

“Merlin! You put a speaking charm on me didn’t you?”

“Well, I thought you needed some help with words.”

James growled jumping up and down in annoyance. You tried not to laugh. Really did. But the corners of your mouth turned up anyways. He looked like an idiot. You giggled as he turned towards you. His cheeks reddened.

“I don’t like you.” He said in a squeaky voice.

“I don’t like you.” You retaliated.

He hated himself for thinking that you looked adorable when you laughed. He wanted to beat himself. No. He wouldn’t. He knew what he would do. He would just prank you instead. He gave you a sickening sweet smile in return, walking back to his own table.

***

You rushed out of the bathroom angrily. Your skin was green. Green. Elodie looked at you with wide eyes.

“What happened?” she asked as you huffed.

“I don’t know, okay? I was in the shower and after using soap, my skin turned freaking green!” you hissed as Elodie tried to calm you. You handed her a small paper and she started to read it.

“Dear (Y/n),

A gift from me, to showcase your pride for your house. You could thank me later.

James.

P.S. This gift in no way means I’ve started liking you. I don’t.”

“James. James did this. That bastard!” you said, wanting to scream as Elodie rubbed your back.

“Well, it’s just hands and legs…”

“I’M GONNA GET HIM BACK. JUST WATCH ME.”

You smirked. You knew just what you were gonna do. James started a fight with the wrong person. You didn’t like him. At all.

***

James stalked towards you angrily as you tried to keep a straight face. You knew what was coming. And you couldn’t help but smile.

“Wow. Real mature of you, (Y/n)!” he said in a baby’s voice as you tried not to crackle. He sounded like he was saying everything through his nose.

“Well, one of us had to be, right?”

“Yeah. And giving me the baby voice makes you the adult.”

“I’d think so, yes.” You said brushing his hair. They were surprisingly soft. His eyes narrowed at you.

“I don’t like you.” He said as you raised an eyebrow.

“I don’t like you.” You said laughing.

***

You adjusted your cap as you heard a whistle behind you. You turned to see James. Of course, it was him.

“I like your cap.” He said smirking.

“Geez. Thank you. Just bought it.” You said through gritted teeth.

“I wonder how it would look on me.” He said as your eyes widened.

“Sorry, not gonna let you borrow it.” You hissed and he laughed.

“What if I just…” he said coming closer as you took a step back, glaring at him in warning. Not that he took it. He snatched the cap from your head as the long white hair fell down.

“James. Give it back.” You threatened, as he put it on his head.

“Nope.” He said as he started running away.

“James!” you shouted chasing him.

Students of Hogwarts saw the two of you with wide eyes. A white haired, ghostlike girl chasing after James as he laughed. This had been ongoing for a long time and people wondered who would win. Some said James, since he had been doing it forever, some (Y/n) since she was a Slytherin. Some just shook their head wishing they would just shag already and get this over with. No one however, had the guts to raise their opinions out loud, lest they would get involved in the prank.

***

“James. This doesn’t go in. We have to stir it first.” You said calmly.

“Why don’t you do it then? Miss know it all.” He said as you looked at him fiercely. Slughorn had paired the two of you together for the next project and it couldn’t be more of a disaster.

“Well, I would, if you let me!” you said taking over the pot. James looked at you as you took a few breaths and slowly made the potion, muttering for ingredients from him every now and then. The potion started coming out just as it was supposed to. He stared at you as you hummed and worked slowly and efficiently. You looked cute like that. Bending over your book, murmuring things to yourself and making the potion. A few strands of hair fell out from the bun you’d put up. His face heated up as you caught him watching you. Lucky he could blame it on the heat.

“Could you cut some beetroots for me?” you asked as he nodded, getting to work. You two finished up with the potion fairly quickly after that.

“So, library at 4?” you asked as he nodded and turned to leave. You looked at his retreating figure, thinking, maybe he wasn’t so bad after all.

And he wasn’t. The more you got to know him, the more you believed in it. You two still constantly teased each other; there was no doubt in that. Even pranked each other ever so often. But they became more and more lighthearted, something you both would crackle over. There was something different about James.

He didn’t look at you with hatred now. Come to think of it, when was it ever ‘hate’? But there was something soft about the way he gazed at you now. Gentle and almost loving? He changed his views on Slytherins, he really did even if it was just a little. It warmed you, when he for once, acknowledged the Slytherin boy to be better at potions than him. It was a start. You had started to notice other things about him too. His goofy nature, his smile which seemed to light up everything around, his eyes that sparkled with mischief. Your heart fluttered when he complimented you. You had long given up trying to beat it down. Nothing worked, ever. Was it really that bad though? Liking James?

***

You were going to the library with a skip in your step. As you turned the corner, you saw James talking to Lily. Way too close to be friends. Something inside you turned and your smile dropped. You had forgotten how he was crazy about the red-head. You stomach twisted up in knots as you saw them both. The feelings you were ignoring for so long crashed on you, drowning you. You turned, walking away.

“Oi (Y/n)!!!” James called out to you as you walked faster not wanting to talk to him. It didn’t work, James ran to catch up with you.

“Where are you going?” he asked reaching up to you.

“I was going to the library, but you seemed to be busy with Evans so I decided not to disturb the two of you.” You huffed, not knowing how to control the anger which was just seemed to burst out.

“Hey! We were just talking for a moment okay? I want us to complete the project first.” He said softly, furrowing his brows. Why were you so angry at him?

You let out a dry laugh.

“Of course you want to finish the project. You want to get away from me as soon as possible, don’t you? Because you don’t like me.” You huffed as James felt his heart fall. He gritted his teeth. Of course you still thought that.

“Yeah. I don’t like you.” He hissed. “So let’s complete the project, shall we? To get rid of each other?”

You looked away. You wanted him to tell you otherwise, you wanted him to reassure you that the two of you were something, anything. Friends, companions, anything but this. But of course he didn’t consider you anything.

“Yeah, sure.”

***

The study session was tense. The two of you never worked quietly. There were always jokes, laughs and talks between the two of you. James had regretted his words as soon as they came out of his mouth. He gulped, seeing your expression fall as you let out a robotic yes. You hadn’t looked at him since. It was killing him. He didn’t know how to break the bubble he had himself created. He hated seeing you closing off to him.

You sighed looking at the last lines you’d written. You looked at the time. It had been two hours.

“I think we should stop. There are just two pages left, we can do them tomorrow and then you’ll be free.” You said packing up your things. James opened and closed his mouth as you picked up your bag.

“(Y/n), listen!” he said as you turned towards him.

“I didn’t mean to-“ James said as you sighed cutting him off.

“James. It’s okay. I-“ you took a deep breath trying not to break. “understand. You don’t like me, I don’t like you. We are stuck together for some time. You don’t have to apologise.”

James sucked in a breath. No.

“But-“

“(Y/n)!!! There you are! I’ve been looking all over for you.” You turned to see Elodie. You looked at James, whose eyes were pleading you to stop. You couldn’t. You left the library, walking towards your friend. James stood there watching your back. Why did he feel like he was losing everything?

He grudgingly walked back to the common room, your thoughts plaguing him. Someone called for him. He turned to see Lily catch up to him.

“James, I was wondering, maybe we could sneak out for some butterbeers. It’s so cold and snowing too.”

James took a deep breath. He wasn’t in the mood for anything.

“Not today, Lily. I’m tired.”

“Oh. I meant it as a date, you know?” Lily said hopefully as he looked at her. He didn’t he feel the butterflies he used to. He had started getting them for someone else, someone far better. It wasn’t Lily he wanted. It was always an infatuation he felt for her. He wanted (Y/n). He wasn’t so sure about anything else. He shook his head. It was now or never.

“Lily, I’m sorry, I can’t.” he said, rushing towards the dungeons.

Running through the corridors, he saw, it was in fact snowing. He shook his head sprinting forward. He stopped suddenly as someone caught his eye. It was you. You were standing out in the snow, looking at the sky. He moved towards you, your back to him, conjuring a snowball. He threw it at you as your eyes widened in shock and you jumped, turning towards him.

“What now James?” you snapped.

He conjured up yet another ball and threw it at you. Your eyes widened as you glared at him.

“I wanted to say something.” He said as you conjured up a ball and threw at him in response. He hissed at the icy sensation.

“Then say it.”

“I don’t want to get rid of you.” He said throwing a snowball at you as your teeth clattered at the sensation. You threw a snowball in return glaring at him.

“Then stop acting like you do.”

He threw yet another ball at you.

“You make me act like that.” He said as you threw a huge one in response.

“I make you act like an idiot?”

“Yes. You drive me crazy!” he said throwing some snow at you as you grunted.

“Then why don’t you leave me alone?” you huffed as he threw yet another ball at you, making you cough and splutter.

“Because I can’t.”

“Why?” you asked throwing a ball at him.

“Because I can’t leave the best thing that happened to me.” He said as you stopped. You looked at him with wide eyes, stalking towards him. You poked his chest with every word you spoke.

“I’M. THE. BEST. THING. THAT. HAPPENED. TO. YOU??? WHAT. IS. THIS? SOME. KIND. OF. PRANK? YOU. DON’T. LIKE. ME.” You said huffing as he just took your hand away and cupped your cheek with his other one, leaning in and kissing you. It was short. You stared at him as you pulled away.

“I promise those are the truest words I’ve ever said.” He whispered as you looked at him and pulled to kiss him again. He sighed against it, pulling you closer by your waist and you tangled your hands in his locks. He moaned a little feeling your warm mouth against his. As you both pulled back breathless he placed his forehead along yours.

“For the record, I still don’t like you.” He said as you giggled.

“I don’t like you either.” You whispered back smiling.

A/N: This is based on the ship request I did long ago for @im-a-writer-right. Can be found here.

#james #james potter #james x reader #james potter x reader #james x y/n #james potter x y/n #the marauders #marauders #marauders x reader #hp #harry potter #Anu writes

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jawabear · 3 years

Note

Hi~ could I request a Javi fic inspired by the song Take my breath away by Berlin? 🥺

Take my breath away (Javier Peña x Reader)

Not my GIF

A/N: thanks for the request Anon! I know you said you wanted it based on the song but I kind of based it on the scene in which the song plays in Top Gun...I hope that’s okay... this is more of a Frankie song to me, but I loved writing this for my love Javi. But I’m sorry if this kind of sucks? I really like it but I think it’s more to my personal taste... but I hope you enjoy it. I definitely recommend listening to the song whilst reading this, and maybe watching the scene too. But it’s not a requirement. Sorry for any mistakes. Stay safe.

Genre: Angst, Smut, Fluff

Warnings: Fem!Reader, angry flirting, very slow sex, Javi being a little clueless about love and feelings, soft!javi, me trying to talk politics, time skips

Summary: The Calí case was to run differently, that was made clear to him. But something else is made clear to Javier as well.

Watching every motion in my foolish lover's game,

On this endless ocean finally lovers know no shame

Another day, another meeting. That’s all it was for Javier. But he didn’t expect much else. He didn’t expect the Cali case to be any different from the Escobar case. It now he was the one calling the shots, everything was a whole lot harder.

But he knew what meetings would entail. Him getting a talk from the ambassador. Generals giving zero shits for the safety of the DEA agents. And anyone else who was in their throwing in there opinions that meant jack shit to anyone else there. And she would be there.

The bane of Javier’s life.

She had been in his life since the Escobar case got going, but before Steve was sent down from Miami. He wasn’t sure what her job role was exactly. But she was in every meeting. In the background. Blending in and going unnoticed until she spoke. But Javi noticed her immediately. A radiant being. A beautiful woman. Who knew how to get shit done. And did it well.

Javier walked into the meeting room where it seemed everyone else had already been assembled, all waiting on him. All eyes were on him. He gave a curt nod and looked quickly around the room for a seat and glancing over the eyes that were on him. All except one pair.

There she sat. Writing something on her paper that probably had no relevance to anything and that no one would ever see. At first she didn’t care to acknowledge him. But he knew that she knew he was there.

Her eyes briefly looked up and met his.

Those eyes. Those damn eyes. They saw everything. They took everything in. She didn’t miss a single detail about anything or anyone. And he had fallen for those eyes. Those bright, big, beautiful eyes.

But it seemed as soon as they met his own, they were gone again, looking back down at her paper. Javi took the only seat that was available, the one that was right opposite her. Of course.

“Nice if you to join us, Agent Peña” Crosby said in a sarcastic tone.

“Sorry I’m late” Javier apologised, adjusting his sitting position as he opened the file in front of him.

The meeting got stated soon after that but it was nothing that Javier hadn’t already been told on his arrival back in Colombia. And besides, his attention was on something far more interesting. Or someone. But she paid no attention to him. She rarely ever did, save for the odd glance here and there. They had hardly ever spoke to each other. It seemed she much favoured Steve when he was there, that’s what he guess anyway. She much preferred to talk to him than Javi.

Javi knew that his feelings for her were ridiculous and one sided. She wouldn’t give him the time of day let alone the attention and affection he desperately wanted from her. She was firm, level headed, and strong willed. She never did anything spontaneous or unplanned. And he never seemed to have a place in her life. He didn’t have a place in her heart. At least, that’s what Javi believed.

“Ambassador” she said as she leaned forwards slightly to make her self visible to everyone. They all seemed a little surprised when she spoke up. Most likely because they had forgotten she was in there. “If I may sir?”

“Please” Crosby said gesturing for her to continue.

She nodded and glanced back to Javier whose eyes had barely left her for the duration of the meeting so far “I am aware, sir, that you have already made it clear to Agent Peña that the Cali case cannot be like the Escobar case. But I wanted to make it clear to both Agent Peña and everyone else present exactly what that means”

She paused for a moment and looked around the room for any sign of objection, but when she receive none, she continued again. “Calí had to be done differently. The Godfathers play by their own rules, yes, but they do have rules. And so do we. So we have to play by our rules too. We have to follow the rules of the Colombian government too. There is no way around that. No more unnecessary risks. We cannot work as freely and as uncontrolled and Agent Peña did in the Escobar case. It’s just not going to pass this time. And whilst they succeeded in capturing and killing Escobar, the extent of the damage left behind is immeasurable. It is best for the people of Colombia and the American government is we try to avoid that same future at all costs”

“Is this now just a dig at me, agent?” He laughed making her look at him.

“No. It isn’t. I’m simply stating that we can’t have a re-run of what you and agent Murphy did in Medellín. Too many lives were lost in the hunt for Escobar. Calí has to be done differently”

“It’s a drug war, (Y/N)” he spat “there is going to be a body count however it plays out”

“It’s the DEA’s job, Javier, to reduce that body count. Or to ensure there isn’t one at all. But from what I’ve heard, you had a personal hand in making the amount large” she retorted quickly, giving him a dark look from across the table.

“I think what she is trying to say,” Crosby spoke up, sensing the hostility between the two agents “is that we take no more unnecessary risks. We play things by the book. For the safety of everyone”

That pretty much wrapped up the meeting and Javier was far too pissed of to stay and shake the hands of those who thought so little of him. He made a quick escape and (Y/N) watch his every move.

But she was more polite than Javi was. No matter how bad a mood she was in, she always stayed to show respect to the others, even if often they didn’t deserve it. But once that was done, she followed in Javi’s footsteps out the door and trailing after him.

(Y/N) didn’t quite managed to catch up to him. She stood at the top of the embassy stairs as he swung open his car door. “Javier!” She called out to him. She knew he heard her, but he ignored her completely. He got in his car and it wasn’t long before he was driving off. “Fuck” she swore under her breath before marching to her own car to chase after him. He was going to listen to what she had to say, whether he liked it or not.

Turning and returning to some secret place inside,

Watching in slow motion as you turn around and say

“Javier” she called again getting out her car to meet him.

“You insult a guy and then follow him home?” He mocked.

“Javier, listen to me-“

“To you saying what? Have you got a list in your pocket of all the other ways you can slate me and my work? If you don’t like me (Y/N), just tell me. You’ve made it fucking obvious to everyone else!”

He went to walk past her by she took his arm in a surprisingly firm grasp and forced him to turn back and look at her. He could see the anger rising in her, she looked at him with serious yet soft eyes.

“Everything I said was true but there was more that I wanted to say. But I couldn’t say it back there. There were things I couldn’t admit back there. Like how I admired your bravery and dedication to this job. I couldn’t say that because everyone would see right through me. I didn’t want people to know the truth” she stated firmly as she looked between his eyes.

He let out a laugh and placed his hands on his hips “oh yeah? What truth?” He asked.

“That I’ve fallen for you” she said without skipping a beat.

For once in his life, Javier was speechless. He just stared at her, not knowing what to say. And she just stared right back, she wasn’t phased by her words at all. But what she was phased by was what he did next.

He walked towards her, grabbing her face in his hands and pressing his lips to her. She immediately kissed him back, he hands coming to rest on his hips. Their lips moved against each other perfectly. The cliche line that they were made for each other became apparent. And it was true.

Nothing felt more perfect.

My love, Take my breath away

She stood up against the wall beside his bed, his hands either side of her head but he stood at arms length away from her. Watching her with hungry eyes as she slowly unbuttoned her shirt revealing her black lace bra.

Javier hesitantly reached out his hand and trace along the fabric whilst she looked up at him through her lashes with wanting eyes. His hand slid up to her shoulder as he pressed his lips to hers again. His tongue came out to run across her bottom lip and she didn’t hesitate in opening her mouth for him to explore. As he did this, he pushed her shirt off her shoulder, it dropped to the floor and he wrapped his arms around her as she brought her hands up to rest of his bare chest.

“I’ve fallen for you too” he whispered. They were the first words he had uttered to her since she had said the same. She hummed against his lips and managed to slip her arms around his neck, lacing her fingers through his thick hair holding his lips against hers.

Carefully, Javi pulled her off the wall and laid her on the bed. He pulled his lips from her and looking into her eyes again. Slowly he lifted his hand and gently brushed a few stands of hair from her face. He then moved that hand down her body and slipped his fingers into her panties and stroked through her folds.

“Javi” she gasped before biting down on her bottom lip. His rough fingers found their way to her clit where he began rubbing soft circles over it making her moan quietly. Javi buried his face into her neck, licking and sucking at her soft skin. Her fingers wrapped around his strong biceps as she melted into his mattress and his sweet touch.

(Y/N) began rolling her hips, grinding against his fingers eager for more friction. Eager for his touch. He pulled his head from her neck and reattached his lips to hers, his tongue sliding back into her mouth, stroking over hers as he pushed down her panties and threw them across the room.

Their tongues still dancing together, her hands moved down his back to his jeans when she skilfully undid his belt and unzipped his jeans. His fingers were still rubbing at her clit making her let out breathy moans into his mouth. She sat up slightly so she could reach into his boxers and pull out his already hard length, teasing his head with her thumb making him instinctively thrust into her hand with a grunt making her smile.

He let out a low growl and pushed her down onto her back again before pushing his jeans and boxers further down his legs. He leaned back over her and slowly eased himself into her.

“Oh fuck” he gasped into the air. She hummed as he pushed further and further into her, her tongue sliding up the length of his neck before he looked back down at her. She looked up at him with a teasing look but that look was soon wiped of her face as he began to slowly thrust in and out of her. She hummed and flattened her hands on his broad back.

They both began filling his room with quiet and breathless moans of each other’s name. The gentle rustling of his bed sheets and quiet squeak of the bed too. The sound of his lips sucking at her neck and the sound of her fingers gliding up and down his back.

Javi had never been this slow and sensual with anyone. But he had never had a reason too. He didn’t need to work out his frustrations of his day, nor did he need to forget. No. He could enjoy it. He could feel it. Feel her. Hear her. Love her.

Her breath hitched in her throat as she rolled her head back, her back arching up so their chests were touching. She moaned from her throat as her nails dug into his back.

No words were needed for him to know he had hit a good spot inside her. Now words were needed for him to know she was already close to her end, but so was he. The slowness of the sex was driving them both crazy in the best possible way.

It just felt so good.

She whispered his name and he whispered hers. His thick fingers trailed down her body again, meeting her swollen clit and rubbing barely there circles on it, the light touches blew her mind, her nails dug further into his skin making him groan.

Javi looked down at her, loving the expression of pleasure on her face. He gently nipped at her chin making her smile “oh Javi” she whispered.

He only moaned in response as her walls began to pulse around him and she began to pant. His hips began to move a little fast and he pressed harder against her clit pulling cut little whimpers and whines from her.

It wasn’t long, then, before she was coming around him. Her breath almost stopping completely as her walls clamped down on him and her eyes were squeezed shut. He came quickly after that, shooting ropes of his hot come inside, resting his forehead against hers.

She was basically frozen in her state of pleasure, her body not moving or responding to him as he slowed his hips and pulled his fingers off her.

Javi pressed a loose kiss to her parted lips “breath for me baby” he whispered to her. Words he never expected to say to someone after sex. But nonetheless, he had to make sure she didn’t die on him. A deep breath fell from her lips fanning over his face “good girl” his hips came to a full stop and he slowly pulled out of her, letting her back ease back down onto his bed as he rolled off her.

Take my breath away

“I’m sorry” she whispered to him as she dragged her finger down the slope of his nose “I didn’t mean to make you angry. I know you did what you had to do for the good of the people... I said what I said because-“

He cut off her apology by pressing his lips to hers in a soft kiss which she returned, her hand moving to rest against his cheek.

“I get it” he muttered against her lips “you don’t need to apologise”

“But I do” she said quickly “you’re a great agent Javi. And I admire you. I want you to know how great and amazing I think you are...” she looked up at him with sadness in her eyes. Desperate for him to know the truth.

“I’m just doing my job (Y/N)” he ran his index finger down the navel between her breasts “but I should apologise to you. For that way I spoke to you”

“I deserved it...” she smiled “for what I said to you”

“I guess we’re even then” he chuckled.

“Hmm, I guess so” she gently pulled his head back down so that she could kiss him again.

Take my breath away

13/01/21

Taglist: @linkpk88 @phoenixhalliwell @lunaserenade @harrys-stan (let me know if you want to be removed or added to the list)

#javier peña #javier peña x reader #javier peña fanfic #narcos #angst #smut #fluff #pedro pascal #fanfic

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hes-writer · 4 years

Text

Benefit of the Doubt

Summary: Harry makes a list and Y/N finds it

Warnings: angst

Word Count: 1.6k

Based on: a request made by @killerstyles :)

Harry’s mother always said that if you love someone; you would do your absolute best to be by their side, through the good times and the bad. There was no denying that Harry loves Y/N—everyone around them could see it. Somehow, they couldn’t. Harry wished that he wasn’t dating Serena. Don’t get him wrong, she was a nice, easygoing person. However, it seemed that her heart belonged to her ex-boyfriend and Harry wasn’t sulking over it too much. Y/N wished that he didn’t see her as just a friend.

“So you break up with Serena and get together with Y/N,” Mitch concluded, “Easy solution.”

Harry sighed, slouching lower on the leather couch as he swept his sweaty palm over his face. He bit his lower lip in thought, explaining that it wasn’t that easy.

As much as he’d like to say that the media doesn’t control him and that his fans’ opinions didn’t matter; they truly did. Serena did not deserve to be put in a place of endless scrutiny about who dumped whom, nor did Y/N have to be catapulted in the spotlight for being his (possible) girlfriend. Neither woman needed the bad attention that came for being with him and Harry felt guilty.

“It’s not that easy,” Harry repeated with a slight shake of his head.

“Either way, someone’s gonna talk,” Adam nodded in agreement with Mitch. “You can’t please everyone, H”

“How about this,” Mitch quipped, eyes bulging as an idea conjured in his mind. “You make a list, pros and cons of Serena and Y/N,”

“Why would I do that?”

“Both of them are gonna get hurt. It’s just a matter of lessening the consequences.”

_____

“Well?” Adam asked with a raised brow, tapping the pen against the sheet of paper.

“Serena is nice but she’s not Y/N,” He answered, scanning the list one more time before making his final decision.

His cellphone was tossed in his lap, the device skimming of his taut stomach before landing on the carpeted floor of the studio.

“Make your call so we can get back to work,” Mitch directed, glancing at Harry who was currently searching for Serena’s name on his contact list.

_____

Another day at the studio meant long hours spent trying to find the right mix of sounds to make a song. He usually did not mind but after his phone call with Y/N a few days ago went thoroughly well, Harry was excited to enter the building.

He had confessed to her—over the phone— and she responded in a surprised manner. Y/N suggested talking it over in person but their schedules didn’t sync up for a private conversation. Instead, they had to settle for when Harry was at the studio and Y/N had a two-hour gap between her classes.

The atmosphere of the room shifted as soon as Y/N entered the room carrying a bag of sandwiches for the band. Mitch was tuning his guitar as he was set to go in the booth right after Harry. Adam was going over some tricky rhythm with Sarah by the drums.

Nonetheless, the band paused their actions to greet her with hugs and smile, granted that she had become close to them over time.

“Hey guys, I brought sandwiches,” Y/N passed around the meals, each of them thanking her for her kindness. Glancing at Harry, he gave her a thumbs up while singing into the microphone, one hand grasping the bulky headphone.

“Something going on between you two?” Charlotte teased, catching the attention of Mitch and Adam.

Y/N blushed lightly, not used to the fact that Harry had a crush on her.

“Not really,” She said, proceeding to walk to the trash bin to toss the oily plastic bag.

“Don’t be coy, Y/N,” The peach-haired woman mused, chuckling lightly at her shy friend.

“Really! Nothing’s going on,” Y/N looked at Harry once more before dropping the plastic in the bin. She couldn’t help but notice a crumpled piece of paper with her name on it. “What’s this?”

Adam shifted abruptly in his seat, alarm flooding his eyes as he looked at Mitch. “It’s just a—“

Serena

PROS

famous

a model

already has a nice body

beautiful

can travel a lot

social

CONS

can be dramatic sometimes

spoiled

allergic to cats (can’t play with evie :(

Y/N

PROS

goes to university (smart!!!)

nice personality

cute

amazing friend

CONS

shy

doesn’t have a lot of friends

reads too much

stays home instead of going out

can’t cook

normal

“Y/N! I’m so glad you’re here, honey” Harry greeted after pushing the heavy door open. A kiss was planted to her cheek and she could sense him giving her a wide smile.

“Shy…doesn’t have a lot of friends…reads too much,” Y/N mumbled quietly, only then did Harry realize what the piece of paper she held read, “stays home instead of going out...can’t cook,”

Harry could feel sweat building at the nape of his neck, tension overtaking the room. Mitch’s fingers stopped plucking the strings of the guitar and the metronome was clicking at a beat that represented Harry’s heart pounding hard in his chest.

“Normal?”

The crack in her words broke Harry’s heart more than seeing her watery eyes looking up at him. He could close his eyes and pretend that the woman he loves was grinning up to him but he can never erase the sound of her voice replaying over and over with such sorrow.

“Y/N, it’s not what you think,” He tried to grab the sheet from her hands, only to have her pull it out of his reach.

“What is this, Harry?”

There was a resonant gulp from the three guys in the room, Charlotte and Sarah quickly realized the gravity of the situation and dismissed themselves from the room, tugging the sleeves of Adam and Mitch with them.

Y/N gave them a grateful smile, shifting her attention back on Harry.

Sweat beaded on his temples, wishing that he had never made the list in the first place, knowing that his decision was as clear as day and self-doubt showed up and kicked him in the ass.

“I just wanted to make the right decision,” He finally admitted, hands grabbing at Y/N’s wrist in an attempt to better the situation. There was no use lying or denying the fact that he did it. It was in his handwriting.

“So you point out my flaws? Compare them to somebody else? You of all people should know how much this hurts me,”

Harry’s mind flashed back a couple of months ago when Y/N almost broke off their friendship. Her reasoning being that her acquaintance with the famous ‘Harry Styles’ has garnered her legitimate threats and worldly advice that someone like her should never be around someone like him.

And to think that he told her to brush it off because he had a date with Serena, leaving Y/N dumbfounded. It’s not like she needed his permission to leave his circle—she just thought that maybe he cared enough to comfort her with wise words of wisdom twice his age.

“What’s wrong with being normal, huh? Can’t be seen with plain, old Y/N?” She questioned while lifting her arms in the air, fingers clenching from how hard she was gripping the sheet.

“Nothing! Nothing’s wrong with you, Y/N!” his voice was pitched higher than usual, panic seeping in his tone. He was going to lose her before she was in his arms. “It was a stupid list. I never should have made it in the first place.”

Y/N scoffed, “You were weighing out your options. I understand. Why would you want to be with someone like me when you can have her”

The disdain in her voice was obvious. She spat the words out before she could realize the effect it had on the man in front of her. Y/N was way past trying o be civil the moment she realized that he wasn’t who she thought he was. Not like he thought of her anyway.

“Why are you focusing on the bad?” Harry cringed for lack of a better word. Her ‘cons’ weren’t necessarily bad, just minor flaws that were inferior to Serena’s outgoing personality.

The glare he received made him cower back slightly on his heels. Despite being taller, Harry felt intimidated by the girl. Truthfully, she was flattered by the ‘pros’ because it made her feel like she stood out. It made her feel special to know that he thought of her that way. However, she can’t ignore his written retorts about her and the fact that he felt the need to write them down, comparing her to a previous fling that embodies what she lacked was what hurt the most.

“Because I can’t change them, Harry! Those flaws make me who I am,” She stuck a finger on her chest, neck craning to as if to yell, but actually doing so to make him see her point. “You should know better than anyone,” Her disappointed sigh made Harry want to scold himself even more. The crease on her forehead disappeared, her eyebrows dropping because she wasn’t angry at him anymore like she initially was. Tired eyes scoping his guilty features as her mouth turned down at the corners, shaming him—a frown.

Y/N could handle criticism from people she didn’t know—people that judged her from what they see on the surface because they didn’t know who she was. It was a bearable pain, unlike this one. This pain came from Harry—the man who admitted his feelings for her through the phone because they were too busy to mutually agree on an in-person confrontation of their feelings. The Harry who let her—a stranger in a cafe— sob in his arms while she broke down, too shy to ask for something until he noticed her timid features, his soft dimpled smile comforting her immediately. It seemed so distant, having known each other for a short time but it still felt like they were childhood friends. Their bond was strong, sharing deep secrets and buried insecurities only to have him use it against her.

-------

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copperpieceharlot · 3 years

Note

Bud I’m sorry to swing into your inbox uninvited like this but my soul is having an OOTS renaissance thanks to your content in the tag and did you say Leverage AU

haha holy SHIT this got Long. but yes. i’ve been. Thinking. (also literally Never feel like you have to apologize for sending me messages. i was Hoping someone would ask me about this. now i have an Excuse to share EVERYTHING ive written abt it :3)

Obviously, Roy is the leader/brains of the outfit. He grew up having some Strong Opinions abt what’s Legal versus what’s Right due to tragic backstory involving the death of his little brother which was definitely SOMEONE’S fault for negligence but since there technically wasn’t any illegal behavior, there were no consequences for it. Also he’s still angry at his dad bc he thinks his dad is also partly culpable (and also also just a dick). He’s the Moral Backbone of the team (alongside Durkon, more on that later) in basically the same way Nate was in og Leverage. He’s actually not the best at figuring out what people want (that’s Haley and, shockingly, occasionally Elan), but once he has that info, he is the absolute best at figuring out the ideal plan of attack to use in any given case.

Haley is still a thief. I mean she maps to Parker almost PERFECTLY. Her dad was a thief & a conman, her mom wasn’t but knew about it and mostly accepted it, but she died tragically in a mugging gone wrong or smth, which made Ian crank the paranoia WAY up and taught Haley to do the same in the name of “safety”. Let’s keep the “Ian is in Trouble and Haley needs money, Fast” which is why she signs on to the first job in the first place. She’s less acrobatic than Parker, tending towards finding (or making) weak spots in security, but she can still make a tumble check when she needs to.

Elan is the grifter who is somehow an Idiot but also not???? It baffles everyone. When he’s playing a part for a con, he’s FLAWLESS, but then the rest of the time he’s just. No Thoughts Head Empty. He probably gets lured in initially because he’s decided to try his hand at being part of a full team, rather than the two-man cons he’s been running that invariably end w his partner conning him as well and stealing half of his take. Also he likes the idea of being Crime Friends. He’s that tweet where it’s like, Roy: “after the heist is over, we split up and never communicate again” / Elan: [about to unveil his Crime Buddies Forever Friendship Quilt Puppets]: “never?”

Vaarsuvius is the hacker/gadget person. They have a Vaguely Snobby Yet Unidentifiable accent, dyed(?) purple hair (nobody has ever seen their roots) and nobody knows who they “really” are or where they came from, but they’re good at what they do so everyone just accepts the mystery. They probably got suckered into the team by their initial employer (who I’ll get to Eventually, lol) framing it as a challenge to their intellect, like, “oh, I see, you’re not smart enough to make this team work for you...” to which they were like Fucking Watch Me and also melted his computer. Anyways. They are joined (digitally) by their Intrepid Friend And Co-Conspirator (his words, not theirs), a fellow hacker known only as Blackwing, or, on certain forums, Blackwing_Bird. (In the first season, V only occasionally references him when saying they’re “calling in extra help” or smth for a particularly complex hack job. He starts showing up a little more in s2 and eventually by the start of s4 is a regular & established presence, but only appears as actions in a computer interface or output.) Elan is convinced he’s an AI, Belkar doesn’t think he actually exists, Haley pretends she doesn’t think he exists, and Durkon and Roy try not to think about it too hard, as long as B and V still get the job done.

Belkar is the hitter. He is on the team bc their initial employer got him out of jail for it. He doesn’t have a tragic backstory, he just likes doing violent crimes. As the series progresses, he grows some empathy & stuff, but really only for people who actually deserve it. Assholes still get decked. It’s all very touching. (Also he has dwarfism caused by achondroplasia. It doesn’t actually bother him and is useful in fights bc his opponents frequently have no fucking clue how to approach him, but he likes Pretending to take offense at stupid things just to see how far he can go with it.)

Aaaand last but not least, Durkon is the least involved member of the team. He’s actually a career criminal and Roy’s mentor, and wasn’t a member of the initial team that [redacted, I’ll tell you later, PROMISE] put together for a couple of reasons, the main one being that he’s Officially retired in order to spend more time with his family, which consists of his mom, his friend (not girlfriend) Hilgya, baby Kudzu, and a truly stunning number of aunts, uncles, and cousins. Roy frequently calls or visits him for advice and he Occasionally shows up to help out on local jobs, but generally he avoids doing crime if he can (as part of a deal with Hilgya, who is also a career criminal; basically, they’ve both cut back on the crime in order to provide a more stable home environment for Kudzu. But sometimes, you gotta do a little crime, and in those cases, Sigdi enjoys spending time w her grandson.)

NOW. THE BIG REVEAL YOU’VE BEEN WAITING FOR. Who got the team together in the first place?!

The answer: Lord Shojo (or whatever Normal Person Name you want to assign him). Now this is where it gets tricky: he had them do a thing that they thought was good, THEN they thought it was BAD, but then when they confronted him he revealed that it Appearing to be bad was actually a test of character and would they consider working as basically internal investigators for him? But then he had a heart attack, so, rip. But THEN it turned out that he’d left them a bunch of money anyway and they were all feeling kind of Inspired so they formed the Order of the Stick, LLC (which, no, i am not coming up with a new name, actually, because I just don’t care. someone else can come up w a justification for that name, tho, i’m sure it’s possible). Also Miko was there and was unhappy abt their actions, and also their general existence.

Moving on. Villains!

Redcloak is the Sterling replacement, because that DEEPLY amuses me.

Xykon is a season-long main villain, probably one that Redcloak finds himself working for but then “teams up with” (read: blackmails) the Order to bring him down bc even Redcloak finds Xykon distasteful. That’s season 3, let’s say.

Tarquin is another season villain, say season 2. Nale probably shows up pretty early in s1, actually, as another recurring antagonist like Sterling but uh. Less good at it. Anyways the s2 final 3 eps deal with them (accidentally) discovering that Tarquin runs some Evil Empire Company, then trying to outplay him and take him down. Idk if Nale still dies in this version tbh.

Tsukiko is a one-off s1 villain who returns briefly in s4 alongside Miko, who has gone well and truly off the rails.

Season 1 finale has to do w Roy finally getting Vengeance for his little brother.

The vampire squad is the s4 finale villain who do smth terrible to Durkon and then get the Mother Of All Revenge served up to them by the Order.

I envision the show as being 5 seasons (like og Leverage) but I’m not going to sketch out s5 because I think it should be based off whatever happens in the current story arc, possibly involving some legacy of the OotSquiggle.

Other stuff!

The Order of the Squiggle is a legendary criminal team from the 60s who stole a BUNCH of famous shit & then proceeded to legendarily implode. This has no bearing on the plot I’ve sketched out, I just think it’s fun.

The Sapphire Guard members should probably be reworked as FBI. I don’t care about most of them but I do think that Lien and O-Chul could be like, FBI agents who Choose to look the other way while the Order does their very-much-not-legal-but-still-fair Justice Crime, and maybe even help them out on occasion.

So, the Final season-by-season outline, based on everything I’ve written so far:

s1 e1: getting the team together, doing a con for Shojo, then at the end he dies and the gang is like “dang what now?" and intend to split up except then they Don’t.

mid-s1: Nale shows up and tries to trick the Order, but then gets beat like a drum.

late s1: Tsukiko is an underling of the Villain Of The Week, winds up in police custody. But She’ll Be Back.

s1 finale: Roy’s Vengeance: The Vengeaning. also we meet Redcloak as an antagonist.

s2 e1: the truth abt Haley’s father comes out

early s2: The Two Live Crews Job but it’s the Order vs the Linear Guild and the Linear Guild ARE all bad guys.

mid-s2: Redcloak returns. ugh.

late s2: the sapphire guard FBI makes its first appearance, hello O-Chul and Lien.

s2 pre-finale: once again they’re in conflict w Nale over smth, he spends the whole episodes making Cryptic Remarks, they basically beat him (like a drum!) but then the stinger at the end is that Tarquin reveals himself and Elan is like “Dad?!”, roll credits.

s2 finale, part 1: Elan is hanging out w Tarquin bc he’s DEEP in Denial, the Rest of the team tries to take Tarquin down, but it doesn’t work.

s2 finale, part 2: Elan finally gets a clue and they manage to beat Tarquin. still haven’t decided if Nale dies or not, but I’m leaning towards yes. also they rescue Haley’s dad.

s3 e1: fuck dude idk.

early s3: Redcloak shows up, AGAIN, everyone groans. he has blackmail on them, he wants them to take Xykon down.

mid s3: The Rashomon Job but it’s about stealing the Talisman of Dorukan and it turns out that Nale was there too (“oh!” Elan says. “I was wondering why I looked so weird in all those mirrors! But it wasn’t my reflection, it was Nale’s!” “Sweetie, that wasn’t Nale’s reflection,” says Haley. “Huh,” says Elan, “so the mirrors were broken?”, cue eye rolling from everyone else.), and the Successful thief was Hilgya, who’d nabbed it from the owner before it even went on display.

s3 finale: they beat Xykon, actually factually, because he deserves to get his ass Thoroughly kicked, even if only in AU form. Lien and O-Chul are there, so are some other less helpful FBI people. There’s a bit where O-Chul Exact Wordses his way out of telling his superiors about the Order’s less legal activities without technically lying. King shit.

s4 e1: doesn’t really matter. maybe smth to do w some legacy of Tarquin’s company to set up the drama w Malack & Durkon later.

early s4: Durkon gets SENT TO PRISON. Malack approaches the Order abt this because sure they have Different Ethics but they’re still Friends. (Roy is surprised and a little hurt that he’s never heard of Malack, but he ignores that in favor of Let’s Get Whatever Fuckers Did This To Our Friend.)

immediately after that: Miko and Tsukiko return as a Team, preventing the Order from working on the Durkon situation

mid s4: Redcloak makes another unexpected & unwelcome appearance but he’s maybe a little less of a dick? the Order collaborates with Malack & his Crime Buddies (hello, Vector Legion) to pull one over on him tho, because “less of a dick” does not mean “a pleasant or decent person”, and also he was mean abt Durkon being in jail, so he totally deserved it. he still gets whatever he wanted tho, just takes a blow to his pride. also prevents the Order from helping Durkon. they’re having a LOT of setbacks wonder why that could be, not to make sure the season fills its whole length or anything, no sirree

s4 finale: something something taking down the organization, headed by Hel (yes that’s her real name), which framed Durkon for their Big Crime. Durkon goes free and Extra Firmly retires, For Good, He Swears, but says he “met someone new” who might be an asset.

s5 e1: minrah joins the team! and the episode is set in like, somewhere really snowy. that’s all i got.

the rest of s5: don’t know, don’t care, it’s open-ended until the comic finishes up.

#mine #ask #corvidcorgi #order of the stick #oots #leverage #leverage au #oots au #au #outline #haha this thing clocks in at 1.9k words because i am LITERALLY incapable of shutting up #hope u enjoy it bc i spent Way Too Much Mental Effort mapping out how the OotS plotlines might play out in a leverage setting #and then promptly ignored Most of that in favor of making it funnier & dumber & more villain-of-the-week #(bc lbr the comic is Good but it's got an overarching plot form that the Leverage story style does Not jive with)#i'm not tagging all these characters lol

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yicruz48 · 4 years

Text

Teen Titans Review: Annual #2 Part 2

August/26/2020

Part 1

This again pushes the narrative of Damian as the angry aggressor with no self-control nor a ability to be conscious of how his own actions hurt other people.

I am not denying that Damian hasn’t been extreme before or has a temper but if written correctly he would have enough awareness to feel guilt for what he did to Emiko and not act so aggressively towards Bruce.

This is another section of the issue that I feel conflicted about how to feel about this for several reasons:

-> The things Damian says in these panels aren’t all false :

I wouldn’t be sincere in this review if I didn’t acknowledge the truth to Damian’s comparison. In the last two years real time the Wayne Manor has become a sort of coffin and tomb. A manor that only carries the echoes of those who used to live there.

After a while, I could imagine it would be distressing to visit the Manor because it would remind them of the people who weren’t there anymore.

-> I fear Anti’s will look at these panels and try to justify Damian as a bad person:

I asked my older brother (Who doesn’t know much about comics besides the bit I tell him) to read the interactions in this issue and give me his opinion on them.

“To me it feels like the writer is trying to show Damian is conflicted and not in the right headspace therefore showing him erupting into a fight with Bruce violently but...I can definitely see how someone who doesn’t like Damian could turn this narrative against him.”

And I agree with him. As much as dislike these direction in writing for Damian, I do see what Thompson was trying to do here (and since the beginning of the run). It hasn’t been executed well, but he has been trying to get the reader to sympathize with Damian (more than Glass that is).

And I believe it is trying to show that Damian is at his wits end, not thinking right-well-I mean-Damian hasn’t been thinking right in TT since 2018, but I guess he’s really not in the right headspace.

But I have the same fear that my brother mentioned, if you look at these same panels through the same lens of someone who doesn’t particularly like Damian you look at this and think is horrible. I can already imagine what they’d say:

“Look at how badly Damian treats his father!”

Although your supposed to look at this as Damian having a outburst after keeping in it for so long and not being emotionally-neglected by his father.

“Alfred’s death was hard for Bruce too, Damian needs to stop acting like he is the only one who is hurt.”

Even though Bruce is an adult and Damian is a teen(a severely-damaged one at that) and you know...BRUCE DIDN’T COMFORT DAMIAN AFTER ALFRED DIED...

And this further expressed in Detective Comics where Damian causally mentions that he is surprised that his father contacted him.

Like...um...Damian is a 13-year-old boy...are you really telling me Bruce hasn’t contacted his own underaged son especially after Alfred died?

“Dick just got shot and lost his memories. He didn’t die. Why is he acting like he died?”

I talk more about Damian’s and Dick’s relationship here.

But to put it simply, Dick is one of the only people Damian trusts to be vulnerable with. Damian is extremely independent yet depends on him the most. This is expressed many times in the beginning of rebirth (specifically in the Nightwing and Batman comics). Losing that connection is extremely damaging to Damian.

Moving on, I actually appreciated this scene with Crush. I happy that she kept the group from intervening between Bruce and Damian.

With the track record of how “great” the Teen Titans are at handling situations them getting in the middle of the fight would’ve made this worse.

Plus I liked that she recognized that this was something personal. So far, I’ve felt like the majority of the Teen Titans have antagonized Damian and it felt refreshing to see Crush realize that Damian’s actions are more personal than they thought.

But at the same time, I don’t know how to take this. I feel like they also wrote this in order prop her up to be the new leader in the next issues so at the same time it feels a little insincere.

I already said this in part 1 of the review but I am grateful for the decency DC or Thompson had to give us some personal reasonings for his actions, but again, it doesn’t work as a good trigger nor does it hold the same hype it would’ve if written earlier when it happened, not months after it happened.

One of the only things about these panels that I have to say is that I saw some people theorizing on twitter that perhaps Damian was expecting to be punished by his father because of how his other brothers have been treated by Bruce. But I really don’t know myself how to interpret it.

Why is Damian questioning why Bruce isn’t fighting back?

-> Was he expecting Bruce to punish him?

-> Was Damian expecting his father to challenge his new beliefs?

Because Bruce doesn’t really challenge Damian’s beliefs at the end, if anything, it seems like Bruce gives up trying to reason with Damian.

Which is sad if you look back to this panel in Batman and Robin 2011:

Jumping back on track, and then we have this panel:

Which is yet again another panel that I feel conflicted about.

I guess it’s nice Bruce finally told his son that he loves him, but also it’s a little to late now. Bruce should’ve expressed compassion to Damian when he had the chance, and he had a lot chances to do this:

-> On his 13th birthday.

-> By being more involved in his life.

-> When Dick got shot to remind Damian he had someone there for him despite Dick not being there.

-> When Alfred died in front of him. That was most likely traumatizing for him, would’ve been nice to have someone there to comfort him.

I feel like I keep repeating myself, but again, this four pages are difficult to interpret.

“Everything...lead...to...THIS”

-> I’m taking this as Damian concluding that being Robin (and everything that encompasses including the no killing rule) lead to him losing people he loved and eventually not being Robin.

“You will never truly see me so long as I am in your shadow.”

-> Damian thinking that Bruce won’t take him seriously if he is Robin?

-> Thinking that Bruce won’t ever truly see who he really is if he is Robin?

“Now I am finally free.”

-> Damian implicating that being Robin was a burden and/or restricted him from doing what he thinks is “right?”

As a Damian stan the last four pages were the most painful to read. Seeing Damian leave the Robin title frustrates me soo much.

Conclusions and Predictions:

-> This issue was not as bad as I thought (but still bad):

For one, I am glad Bruce didn’t beat up Damian.

I am glad they had the decency to give Damian more personal reasons to go down this path even if it was late.

-> (I’m gonna start talking about the art more in my reviews)

Pansica is a very talented artist BUT I personally don’t think he was the best choice to draw a comic with teens. The adults in this issue were drawn great but I feel like drawing teens is not his strong point.

There was points in this comics were Damian looked unpleasant and I think it was because Pansica tends to be very detailed although a lot detail does a disservice to drawing teens. As a artist myself, I lay off the details when drawing children since it often ages them more if you put more detail.

Maiolo’s colors are good. I don’t know if it was a conscious decision or not but the dullness of the color really emphasizes the darker vibe of this issue.

-> Thompson didn’t fail me this issue, he still manage to make me hate Roundhouse more than last issue :)

He also really pushed that unnecessary Emiko X Wallace ship in the middle of this issue. I think the bothers me about this relationship is that they gotten closer because of Damian killing. I really don’t vibe with that.

-> Bruce just suddenly offering a hug after giving Damian death stares at the beginning just confuses me.

-> Teen Titan’s didn’t ever take Deathstroke go and basically let him go unless he’ll be appearing next issue.

-> So far Damian sucks as being a villian/anti-hero, he failed both at killing KGBeast and Deathstroke.

-> Hate that once again, most of the blame was thrown at Damian.

->To Damian, being Robin was the best thing to happen to him.

It allowed him to see the mistakes in his past(that he was made to do) and work towards becoming a better person...in other words, it granted him an opportunity to redeem himself.

Not only that, but it granted him the opportunity to honor the people who helped him become a better person (Dick and Bruce).

And even Damian felt like he needed to “prove” that he could be Robin because I think even Damian felt like he didn’t deserve it or wasn’t good enough.

What this comic has done with him is atrocious and will always be no matter the outcome.

I have a petition related to Damian here. I would appreciate it if you shared and signed.

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char-lotteral · 3 years

Note

I agree with Kishimoto never trying to use the girls. The hate they get is not fair. I used to defend Sakura back in the days because I hoped kishi would do her justice. When shippuden started I WAS SO HAPPY because I thought this was the start of something great for Sakura and the girls but NOOOOO. Every time, Sasuke showed kishi turned her brainless. If you compare Naruto's actions and Sakura's actions to sasuke, you'd see they're completely different. What's up with that weird fake love confession scene 😭? It makes her look like she was manipulating Naru. JEEZ.

Also he literally had badass Tenten and Temari with cool useful abilities and he didn't use them ?! TF ?! Thank god for modern authors who treat their characters with respect :)

okay2 you know how i am with these longass rants so click readmore and brace yourselves

The way I see it, Sakura's character development in shippuden was always one step forward, two steps back. She gets this really badass scene (like her fight with Sasori and those cool ass medical skills) but is then regressed back into a pining girl in love every time Sauce is on screen or Kishi just throws her in the background YET AGAIN.

I love Sakura's abilities actually. Her brute strength, intelligence, vast knowledge and skill as a medic nin. But what I dislike about her character is how kishi handled her feelings for Sasuke. Naruto and Sakura's obsession with Sasuke was so???? huh??? it was so damn toxic and i never once understood why both Nardo and Sak were so obsessed with him. They were a team for one year???? I mean its great that they care about him alot but Sauce's feelings were kinda valid. His freakin clan died. Id go batshit crazy against my own village too. BUT BESIDES THAT. Both Nart and Sakura's Sasuke obsession was so annoying. 80% of shippuden was literally Keeping up with the Uchihas or Naruto yelling SASUKEH. BUT what irks me so much is the fandom's double standards with both Naruto and Sakura. "Oh Sakura shouldve gotten over her Sasuke obsession" but then turn around and call Naruto's obsession cute and gush about how he's so in love with him!!

Hot take but the only reason why sasunaru is "the most developed ship with the most chemistry" is because theyre both male characters.

I guarantee you if Naruto was a girl and SHE would be the one to have this unhealthy obsession who was chasing around Sasuke, the fandom would shit on Naruto just as much. And if Sasuke were a girl, Sauce would be sidelined like the rest of the female cast and Naruto would have another male character to have a "brotherly bond" with, because thats the only bond Kishimoto is actually good at developing. Yey for male characters having all the screentime and cool assets <333

And about that confession scene, I get her intentions. I really do. I understand that she did that in order to bring him home and that she cares about him but honey, w-why?? Why lie to him about your feelings?? Supposed he DID believe her, then what? then what kishi???? huh??? Some of her fans point the blame on Sai or whatever but I personally dont see why that scene was at all necessary. Maybe to establish Naruto's feelings for her wasnt all that serious? or his maturity? idk man. That scene was such a clusterfuck.

In the end her development in The Last and in Boruto was immaculate. She had one of the best glow ups in the old gen and ironically enough, her character wasn't butchered in Boruto. She got badass scenes she was cheated from in shippuden. I also love how she's finally getting the spotlight she deserves. Unlike the other konoha 12 :,)))

Okay onto the next female character that Kishi completely wasted. My baby. My light. 🙈 AAAHHH HINATAA.

I DONT EVEN KNOW WHERE TO BEGIN OKAY2 DEEP BREATHS.

Let me just establish this real quick. Hinata's goal was to get stronger because of Naruto, her goal was never to be with Naruto. She wanted to become someone who is worthy enough to stand beside him, someone whom he can consider as an equal, as a partner. She NEVER once said "marrying Naruto-kun is my all time goal UwU" (if youre one of those weirdos who interpret her character that way, youre immediately invalid, go take a hike)

I personally dont have anything against their crushes but to the point of making their personalities revolve around these guys every time theyre onscreen is so fucking frustrating. And with the way he writes their dialogues is so.damn.cringey. Like that one scene in the war arc with Tsunade and Madara

"I mAy bE a WomAn but I aM nOt WeAAKKKK"

BAAHAHAAHHA WHAT?? Everyone else gets coolass monologues and one liners but thats the best you can come up with Kishi?????? Hilarious.

If im being honest. Hinata's character is actually kinda well written. Not well executed. Dear God no. But with the way he set her story, her personality, her chracterization. She's honestly one of the best written female characters on the show. IMO. By Kishi's standards of writing women ofc. She's hands down one of the most complex characters. Her shy personality wasnt out of the blue, it wasnt a cutesy waifu trait. Her abusive upbringing made her that way. Her trauma turned her that way. So yeah, sue her if she looked up to Naruto as an inspiration when everyone else in her family treated her like dust. Shit on her for having Naruto's love light in her dark when her own damn father wouldnt even look her in the eye and her entire clan shunned her because she was "weak." She doesnt owe her family shit so idgaf what they do with the Hyuga clan. Neji and Hanabi aren't included btw

Im not gonna deny that her role in the show was only as the love interest but tbh for a love interest, Im glad her character wasnt so one dimensional. It just pains me SO MUCHHH how fucking wasted she is. Every time she's with Naruto, they always make her into a damsel in distress. They always feel the need to turn Naruto into the heroic prince. How cute.

LIKE THAT ONE SCENE IN THE LAST WHERE SHE'S THROWN IN THE CAGE?? WHY??? LET NARUTO AND HINA FIGHT THAT FREAKING ALIEN GOD TOGETHER. QUIT WITH THE TOXIC MASCULINITY. WE GET IT. NARUTO'S STRONG. GOOD FOR HIM. NOW LETS SEE HINATA THROW HANDS AND PUT NARUTO IN THE CAGE GODAMMIT

Hnggggg dont get me started with her role in Boruto. She's as relevant as a damn houseplant in the manga. They made her into an invisible trophy wife and "the mc's mother" and we all KNOW what happens to the shounen mc's mother once mc is in need of character development :) Quit putting her in the background. Give us that scene where she won against Hanabi DESPITE being retired for years. Give us that scene where she trains Boruto. GIVE US ANY FIGHT SCENE OF HER WHERE HER POTENTIAL ISNT WASTED WTF?¿

Now if you say that Hinata didnt have development. YOURE INVALID. She came from an abusive household, the shyest girl in her class, her insecurities got in the way of her own confidence, had difficulty of standing up for herself now became a loving mother of two, has the guts to kick her husband out of the house(with whom she couldnt even keep eye contact with when she was a kid) became the strongest hyuga, most supportive wife and mother, and has given her kids the comforting childhood she never had as a kid.

She has one of the most beautiful stories in the show and if you think her personality is only Naruto-kun and big boobs, then im sorry that you cant appreciate such a heartwarming story.

And I agree, killing her would honestly make me feel more at ease than continue to see her suffer because of godawful misogynistic writers. But at least let her die in an epic fight. Please. PLEASEE. She got nerfed so bad, i feel a physical pain every time i think about it

Okay what else. I think Ino got pretty good development. Another wasted potential in shippuden but she's doing good for herself in Boruto. I dont know what Temari is up to. They basically made her into another classic angry mom who beats up her husband for comedy trope. Haha very funny and original! Im not sure with her career, im not that invested in the anime.

Tenten??

oh G O D Tenten. The dirtiest of all. Her jokes about her screentime is so mean and i hate that its true ahsjhs. She was the only female character in OG who's goal wanted to be as strong as Tsunade but what did Kishi do to her?? Sidelined. Forgotten. Irrelevant. Like every damn female on the show :D

Konan shouldnt have died. I blame plot armor. I know in my heart that Konan wouldve kicked Obito's ass if it weren't for Kishi's boomer mindset.

Tsunade had so much hype when she was introduced but died down in the war arc. Madara wiped the floor with the kages. Holy shit. Not only that, but yipee! Naruto is there to save the day AGAIN!!!!

AND UGHHHH If the female characters were given proper treatment then maybe MAYBE all the endgame couples wouldve made fucking sense????¿¿¿

I think that ends my rant. Im not sure how the female characters in Boruto are handled. Except maybe Sarada (she's pretty well executed in the manga imo). But arguably they are sooo much better handled in Boruto than how the old gen girls were. And thats because Kishi isnt anywhere near the new gen female cast. I cant formulate a solid opinion with the other new gen female cast since im not entirely invested in the anime. Not ashamed to admit that I only watch it for the sunshine moments and for Hinata :DD

#and *scene #salty char.txt #char complains about Naruto AGAIN #yey #please end my suffering #i need to leave this fandom what am i still doing here #naruto #day 202 of WTF KISHI #i think i got that out of my system

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wtfevenismypage · 4 years

Text

Wakey Wakey Eggs and Bakey

request: Hotch x male reader where the reader gets taken by the unsub but the readers like being a sarcastic shit and making his situation worse and when you manages to escape hatch finds out about the sarcasm and general disregard for how serious the situation was and is worried but also happy and pissed

Warnings: Cursing, Blood, Depictions of torture, kidnapping

A/N: Have I told y’all how much I like writing sassy readers?

A scalding pain in your rib shocks you awake.And upon looking around, you discover it’s a knife, slicing patterns and scribbles into your skin.

“Shit.”

You whine out, throwing your head back in pain.

“Look who’s awake.”

“Hey. Got any eggs? Bacon?”

You chuckle to yourself, delirious due to the pain. You had a generally high pain tolerance, but being cut up like a piece of meat will hurt anyone.

“Nope. No eggs. No bacon. Only a knife and two hands.”

“Ooooo kinky. I like it rough, how’d you know?”

He doesn’t seem to find your totally funny joke funny at all. He digs the knife a little bit deeper, eliciting a loud groan from your lips.

“You think you’re funny?”

“Oh I think I’m hilarious.”

You speak between groans, unable to not joke in a situation like this. Sarcasm is a human’s best defense in your opinion, it could piss people off to the point of your release and that’s exactly what you needed.

“See bud, you chose the worst person on the team to kidnap, I am unbreakable. Many have tried, all have failed.”

You smirk through the pain as he stands, walking away briefly before returning with a camera. You almost laugh.

“Why the hell do you guys keep doing this? Every time one of us gets kidnapped people film it. You gonna show my team?”

“Not them. I’ll be streaming to the dark web to see who wants you. Maybe I’ll cut off your fingers, keep ‘em for myself.”

You just chuckled as he turned it on, streaming it to the dark web where your team was surely watching.

“Ugh, Hotch is gonna be so mad that I got caught. I can only imagine the lecture I’ll get.”

Your jokes really don’t seem to be impressing the short man. The grimace on his face seemed annoyed and angry, he wanted to slice you up into little pieces already, but he was all about giving a good show.

“Stop talking or I’ll cut your throat.”

“Awww, but then you won’t hear all of my precious screams! Don’t you want to hear them? I bet other people will. They’ll be so disappointed in you.”

You can practically feel Your unit chiefs glare on you as you continue to taunt the man. Hotch was well aware of your joking ways, how you never took anything seriously unless one of the agents on your team or another innocent was in danger or injured.

“That’s it you brat. I’m gonna make you scream.”

He raises the knife to your bare stomach, plunging the smooth blade in, gaining a loud groan from you as he yanks it out, admiring the way the blood spills out of your body.

“Shit.”

You groan, Breathing heavily as he continues to stab you once more. You refuse to give him what he wants though. He wants a reaction, a scream of pain, anything but your bullshit.

“Now we’re getting somewhere. What? You want attention? You won’t get any, I’m the one getting the attention, as always, and you, you are just in the shadows pulling the strings.”

That earned you an aggressive slice across your torso, a gasp of pain hissing out of your lips as groans and moans follow.

“Was it a sibling? Huh? You were always living in their shadow, constantly compared to them? Hurts knowing that they were always better?”

His expression darkened and you knew immediately that you were right. A sibling that was in the light, He was their shadow.

“She wasn’t no better than me! I deserved the attention not her!”

Your breathing became labored as you bled onto your pants, the pain becoming a sharp ache as the adrenaline keeps you awake. Shockingly, the only thing keeping you alive was the large slice directing itself from your right pec to your lower left side of your tummy.

“You’re right. She isn’t any better than you. Just please, stop with the knife. I get it okay? It isn’t fun being in someone’s shadow, trust me I know. The higher ups are training me to be the next unit chief, and they never stop comparing me to Hotch. I mean come on! We’re complete opposites! And really, no one could live up to him! Dude, I understand you.”

His face brightens, a look of sympathy on his face. Oh boy Hotch was definitely going to kill you.

“You do?”

You struggle to plant a smile on your face, sweat and a tear or two mixing together on your cheeks. This guy sickened you to your core.

“Yeah! I promise you, untie me and I promise I’ll make sure you escape. You don’t deserve what happened to you man! I’ll be sure you get out of here and you’ll get away with it, but I can’t do that with my hands behind my back.”

You shrug your shoulders, Heaving violently as he quickly crosses behind you and unties your wrists and ankles. They feel tight, achy. Itching to kick this guys ass.

“Alright, give me a second to gather myself, or else I’m gonna pass out.”

You say, leaning over and breathing shallow breaths as he crosses back in front of you. To catch him off guard, you grab the back of his neck with both hands and bash it into your knee.

Two tight grips latch onto your wrists as you continue to beat him up. He groans and tries to fight you off, but fails, falling to the floor unconscious.

“Alright, goodbye dark web, and possibly my team, I have a hospital to crawl to.”

You groan as more blood seeps out of your wounds as you walk away, hunched over.

There was no way in hell you were going to make it back to the station without bleeding out, but maybe someone will see you from a street and take you to a hospital.

That’s really the best bet for now.

And as soon as you reached the the pretty much empty street, you could feel your mind weighing itself down, shutting down your arms, legs, and eyes at last as your entire body crashes down on the asphalt.

You wake up with a steady beep next to your head. Chatter of people rushing by your room with a beeping of a phone a few feet away. Your eyes flutter open slowly, a sharp ache in your torso.

Penelope is sitting right next to you, her hand gripped in yours as she scrolls through her phone, streaks of tears on her cheeks.

“Hey Garcia...”

You manage to rasp out, her head darts up, staring at you in shock.

“Oh my god! Y/N I thought I lost you! Never do that again!”

You chuckle as she begins crying again, squeezing her hand tightly as she pulls turns to the hall, calling a doctor in.

It’s been a day since you woke up, and a few people came to visit you. Spencer stopped by with Morgan, the two brought you some milk, because according to Morgan “the milk in the hospital tastes like gasoline” and Spencer told you all of the vitamins that this brand had put in it.

Penelope hadn’t actually left, And Emily came in to bring you your favorite scarf as a little token of home. Rossi and JJ brought you pasta and played poker with you and Spencer (Spencer let you win).

The only person who hadn’t visited was Hotch. And that fact made you nervous. The only reason you could think of was that he either blamed himself or he was upset with you and didn’t want you in his sight.

You opted it was the latter.

So when you bolted awake from a nightmare, Forehead dripping in sweat and Hotch’s hands at your shoulders, you were terrified. He reassured you that you were safe and calmed you down before sitting back down.

“Hi sir...”

“Sir? Y/L/N call me Hotch. I’m here to check up on you and take a file. You up for that?”

You manage to nod, wiping the sweat off of your forehead before sitting up slowly, groaning at the feeling of the scarring skin on your torso.

“Alright, walk me through what happened, if at any time you feel uncomfortable you can stop. No explanations needed.”

You nod, an uneasy smirk on your lips. You were struggling to keep your sarcastic easy-going front up and you knew Hotch could see straight through it. You were just glad he was patient enough not to say anything.

“Well, after you sent me home I obviously didn’t go home. I went to a bar. A guy there told me to follow him once I was drunk off of my ass, so I accepted his gracious offer.”

You let out a dry chuckle, recalling the night until the end.

“When we got to a private room, he uh... He brought a cloth up to my mouth once we were in the bed. And... Next thing I know I wake up with... With a knife in me.”

Breathing and the beeping of the machines behind you was all that could be heard for a moment before you continued.

“I tried to remain strong... He really wanted to see me break. But I uh... I continued to use my obvious charm and sarcasm to piss him off more. Which only uh... It only made things worse.”

He sighed, staring at you in disbelief.

“You know, I saw what happened, we were all watching. All of your training for situations like that just flew out the window. Why?”

His tone was sharp, harsh. He wasn’t angry, more disappointed than anything.

“I... I don’t know... I just panicked and went freestyle! I blacked out and forgot! I’m sorry alright! I escaped though! I got out and learned his motivation!”

“Yeah, and he escaped.”

“Oh I’m so sorry your highness! I was more focused on getting out of there alive and getting information than bringing him in! And anyways, now we have more to add to the profile! I saw his face we can track him down!”

Hotch’s eyes flashed between your heaving state and the machine next to you, your heart rate was rising at a rapid pace as you spiraled into a coughing fit.

“Alright, you’re right Y/N, calm down. We’ll catch him, but you need to stay here and rest. Please.”

He pleaded, setting a warm hand on your thigh which seemed to calm you down instantly. You settled back into the uncomfortably stiff hospital bed, closing your eyes for a moment as everything sinks in.

“I’m tired Hotch. You saw the rest that happened yeah? Well there you go. There’s your file. Now just... Leave me alone.”

You whine like a little boy, one of your hands tracing your stab wounds on your stomach as tears slip out of the closed slits of your eyes.

“Y/L/N, I’m relieved that you’re alright. And I’m sorry that I sent you home, I should have let you stayed longer as you asked to. I-”

“Hotch, stop it. I don’t blame you in the slightest and neither should you. I should have gone home instead of going to a bar and I shouldn’t have drank or followed that guy. Don’t blame yourself for my idiocy.”

You hesitantly placed a hand over his, rubbing his knuckles with your thumb. You kept your eyes shut however, not having the guts to meet his eyes.

Meanwhile Hotch was having an internal battle on whether or not he should press a soft kiss to your hand or not. You were tired, ragged and torn down.

But with a calm breath, he raised your hand to his face, and pressed a slow and thoughtful kiss to your palm. His lips were soft and warm, they sent shivers up your spine and left a tingly sensation on your skin when they left.

“Rest well Y/L/N. I’ll visit tomorrow.”

He left you alone again and you smiled widely, the first real smile in a while. He knew how to match you perfectly. He knew you so well.

And oh boy was this going to be interesting.

PERMANENT TAGLIST(OPEN) @pinkdiamond1016 @spencer-reids-snow-white @sheepfather @eusuntgroot @libradolan @dr-reid-ismyspiritanimal @zhangyixingxing1 @secretpickleprofessordean @aquarius-pisces-rose

IF YOUR NAME IS CROSSED OUT I COULDN’T TAG YOU, SORRY!

#criminal minds #criminal minds fandom #criminal minds fanfic #criminal minds fic #criminal minds fanfiction #aaron hotch x reader #aaron hotchner #aaron hotchner x reader #aaron hotchner x y/n #aaron hotchner x you #spencer reid #dr. spencer reid #penelope garcia #emily prentiss #derek morgan #david rossi #luke alvez #thomas gibson

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random-imagines-blog · 4 years

Text

Holy Rivers {Jon Snow x Reader Oneshot}

Requested by: Anonymous Wordcount: 3117 Summary: You really don’t like the attention that your lover, Jon, has been getting from the Dragon Queen. You intend to make sure he knows that he’s yours. TW: Pretty much all smut below honestly. NSFW.

You always loved the sea, and a part of that was because your father, Davos Seaworth, was very much a man of it. It was even in your surname! But this had to be the gloomiest voyage that you had ever been a part of. Many of the people on these ships were heading for death. Hope of survival was slim in these days in any war, but one against the incoming dead? You stood on the bow of the ship, looking out at all that was ahead, trying only to see the good side of things. You had your father here, and he was still a good fellow to have during a fight despite his disfigurement. And you had your lover, Jon. And circling above the ship in the grey skies were two dragons, which was some pretty good arsenal in your opinion.

Yes - you were sailing with Daenerys, and the weight of all of her other titles. She surprisingly liked you, admired your lack of servitude towards men, that you didn’t put up with any sexism, that you were even tougher than some of the men in your own army. That you refused to slink back and act like a helpless woman when things got tough. When she wasn’t demanding people bend the knee or going on her ten minute rant of all of the names that she had, she wasn’t all that bad. But she had done something tonight which had pinched a nerve in you, and made you think of her as an entitled brat - not for the last time either.

During dinner, which she had invited you two to have in her cabin, she had been giving Jon some looks. Now, she could definitely not say that she did not know about the two of you since you were always together. Just because there was no wedding doesn’t mean that you two weren’t practically married already. Everyone knew that - even your father, though he didn’t fully appreciate that you two hadn’t had the ceremony yet. And yet, she had rested her hand upon Jon’s arm, and probably more under the table that you could not see.

You kept your calm during dinner, keeping your eyes on the plate to avoid shooting dirty looks at the ‘Queen’. You didn’t trust anyone with that title these days. Cersei was bad enough. Now you had this to contend with up close and personal. After the meal, once you and Jon were back in your own shared cabin, you were really able to let loose with your thoughts.

“Yes, I’m grateful that she had brought her dragons to fight our cause, and yes, I think it’s great that she has a whole army of people who are obviously devoted to her but my god, do I have to lose you to her in order for us to have a chance to live another a couple of years?” You asked, pacing the floor with your arms crossed in front of you. Jon was sitting on the bed, undoing his boots, saying nothing. He’d learned the value of silence when it came to your anger since arguing back had disastrous consequences. “And you just let her!”

“What do you think I should have done then?” He asked when there was a lull between your words.

“Not look at her like you were going to pick up your fork and feed her!” You said, opening up the window just to have something to do with your hands. You were feeling hot, your blood boiling. “I know we are not wed and your life is still your own but I never want to see another woman put her hand on you like that.”

“Some might say that you’re jealous,” He said, attempting to hide a little smile but you had caught sight of it. It just made you feel all the more passionate about the situation.

“Jealous?” You asked, turning on him, your whole body standing over him now. “You think that I am jealous of that white-haired woman? I would not trade places with her for any ship in the sea. Jealous - as if.”

“She was just trying to be friendly, and gain our trust.” Jon insisted, looking at you, completely undaunted.

“Well, she lost some of mine,” You scowled. “Are you trying to make me seem like the bad guy here? Because if that’s really what you want, I can become that.”

“I don’t know if you can,” He said. His words had flipped a switch in your mind. You were angry before, but now - now you were downright possessive. You had to make sure that he knew that it was you who would be there for him, you who would fight at his side, you who would love him until death. With the war coming, the two of you had not wasted much time. The relationship had developed quickly, and feeling that your time was coming near, you’d been making the most of it. There was not an inch in this cabin that had not been explored by the two of you during sex, nor were the kitchens or the deck truly clean. It would make your father disgusted to know that ships had been used this way by you. But you didn’t care if he knew - you were in love.

“You really think,” You asked, hopping yourself on his lap, wrapping your legs around his abdomen while he sat up straight. “-that you’re going to be able to distract me from that with sex?”

“I don’t have another choice,” He said, leaning forward to press a kiss on your chin. “I can’t have you killing her before we fight the war.”

“I guess that’s a fair point,” You sighed, tangling your fingers up in the curls of his hair. It was a sweet spot for him, causing his eyes to close and a mouth come out of his slightly parted lips. It was a beautiful sight. You wouldn’t trade him for any ship in the world either.

The playing with his hair went on for another moment before you yanked your hand away, causing him to groan rather than moan. His eyes shot open and he looked at you pleadingly to continue but you tutted and shook your head. “I’m the bad guy, Snow, you’re not always going to get exactly what you want.”

You hopped back to your feet and turned your back towards him, knowing that it would only tease him more. You lifted your tunic up from over your head and let it land on the floor near him. Your back was exposed to him, and you knew how much he loved it. Many a night he had fallen asleep while running his fingers up and down your spine. You turned your head over your shoulder and blew him a kiss, your hair falling over your shoulders to cover whatever might have been in view.

You abandoned wearing dresses whenever you were on a ship. Such a little thing as tripping on one’s long skirts could easily mean death when you could fall overboard and into the freezing water of the Narrow Sea. As well, you were rather proactive in the upkeep of the ship, even ascending the nets to get to the Crows Nest and take a turn looking out for land. That sort of climbing was not something that you could do in a dress. So now, in front of Jon, you were attired only in your trousers, your stockings to keep the cool air out, and your shoes.

A benefit of being a part of the ship was the muscle tone that you had, that you were proud of. You could arm-wrestle with the best of them, even beating Tormund once. The same arm that you used untied the laces of your shoes so you could kick them off - always the least sexy of the undressing processes. But then you were at your trousers, tied up with a corset-like front with a strong knot. Your fingers worked nimbly with it, undoing it slightly, pulling the thin piece of rope out so that Jon could tell what you were doing.

“You’re not being bad, you’re just being a tease,” Jon said, leaning backwards, balancing himself on his elbows. He was taking in the show, though. He would be crazy not to be enjoying it. He longed to kiss your shoulders, work his way down your back, down down down until he reached where your pants lingered -

But those soon disappeared, much like the top that you had thrown away. You had taken the stockings with you, stepping out of them with care. Now you were nude in front of him, but still with your back towards him. His eyes took in the most prevalent thing he could see - your ass, which was just the perfect size for him. He never cared much for looks - not caring about the whores the way that Theon did. But you - you were blessed with both looks and a personality that he had fallen for so quickly it nearly gave him whiplash.

You ran your fingers through your own hair now, cocking one hip up and then another in a dance that seemed very much like it was Dornish in origin. You hummed a song that you recalled from one of the ports you had stopped in many moons ago when you were helping your father with smuggling, and danced to it. “I don’t think you’re much of a good guy yourself, Jon. Letting her touch you like that in front of me. Putting me into this rage just to get a reaction out of me. I think you deserve to be teased.”

“Is that how it’s going to be?” He asked. You turned to the side, still rotating your hips, back to humming, and nodded. “The Queen is very beautiful, isn’t she?”

You avoided looking at him, knowing that he had a smug expression on his face. He enjoyed testing you, getting your mood up. Things always got rather heated that way. You slowed your dance down to a tantalizing pace, spinning around so that he could see your full front, a scene that always took his breath away. “Do you want to say that again?” You asked. He shook his head quickly, eyes transfixed on your chest.

“Didn’t think so,” You said. You leaned forward, moving in closer and closer to him, before tugging violently at his trousers. He lost his balance due to the force that you used and fell back upon the bed. Good - that was a good place to have him. You undid those trousers and pushed them down over his feet until they fell on the floor beside yours. This room was infamous for having discarded clothing all over the place.

His cock sprung out, freed from the fabric cage that they had been locked into all day. It was already as hard as a rock. You teased him further by licking the tip, making him grab onto your shoulders. His hastily trimmed nails dug into the skin, leaving little pink crescent marks. You would be sure to return the favor later. You kissed the tip, then licked up and down the sides in the same painfully slow pace you had taken with your dancing.

“Do you think that the Queen would do this?” You asked, sucking about half of his cock down your throat. Now, he wasn’t a giant in that department, but he was a nice size. Still, you were able to get all the way down if you wanted to, but right now he didn’t deserve that. He moaned at that, but didn’t give you an answer. Instead he just squeezed you once more, lightly attempting to push you down but you didn’t budge. Your tongue played against his split, then licked the underside of his cock before you released, the cold air bringing goosebumps to his pelvic region after being in your warm mouth.

“You’re thinking about her way more than I am,” Jon said, raising his head up to look at you. You shook your head, resenting the idea of that. Before you could make another move, Jon grabbed onto you and pulled you onto the bed. He was strong, and able to move you like you were a child’s doll made of fabric and sheep’s wool. His face was now buried in between your legs, and he started to lick at you as if your pussy was the fountain of youth.

“You’re so focused on thinking about her face that you can’t even remember her name?” You asked, biting down on your lower lip to keep from squealing. His beard always ended up tickling you, making you squirm. You didn’t grab at his shoulders like he did, but rather, grabbed onto the sheets for support. Your head was so close to knocking against the headboard but that was the least of your concerns at this moment. He was sucking on your clit, bringing you to a high far more quickly than you had anticipated. You struggled against him, then raised your feet under him to push him off. He looked up at you, lips moist and glistening, caught your eye then rolled his.

“That doesn’t even make any sense,” He said, looking exasperated. He tried to grab at you again so that he could return to his feast but you kicked him off of the bed, making him land on the floor. You smirked as he got up onto his feet, but that didn’t stay for very long. He picked you right up off of the bed before you could protest, slamming you down onto the desk, which was covered in maps and letters from ravens.

“I just think you liked the attention, Jon. Do you like her more than me? Do you think she’s better than me?” As you were asking these questions, you were trying to get off the desk. There were little figures on the map to help with strategy and they were digging into your bare back. As you flailed, Jon took the opportunity to step between your open legs and thrust his hard cock right into you. It was so quick that it hurt, causing an immediate discomfort but it slowly eased into pleasure. That didn’t mean, though, that you were done being irritated.

Jon held onto the back of your neck, forcing your head up to look at him as he thrust in and out, keeping eye contact the entire time. “Does it seem like I think she’s better than you?” He asked in disbelief.

“Can’t tell with you sometimes,” You muttered, pushing his hand away from you and leaned your head back against the wall. He instead grabbed onto your ankle and your thigh, keeping your legs spread as you struggled to find a way to keep yourself from being shaken too much. “Are you thinking of her right now?”

“I’m trying not to, but you keep bringing her up!” He growled. “Are you done with your jealous fit?”

You thought for a moment, which was hard because you could nearly feel yourself reaching a climax. You didn’t want to - that would mean that Jon won the argument. But you had a plan. Finally getting your arms underneath you, you pushed yourself up off of the desk, quite a few of the little figures sticking into your back but you didn’t care, and wrapped your arms around Jon’s shoulders. He was in a standing position while you were holding onto him like a reverse piggy back. Using your strength, you raised yourself up so only his tip was inside of you, then clenched your inner muscles to tease him all the more. Milk him.

“Almost,” You told him, resisting when he tried to drop you down little by little. “Who is your Queen?”

Jon froze entirely at that question. “What?”

“Not the Queen of the Seven Kingdoms, not the Queen of Slave-Freeing, none of that. Your Queen. Whisper it if you are afraid of treason, but if you do not give me the answer that I want, I’m walking out that door.”

Jon didn’t hesitate after that. “You are,” He said softly, whispering it into your ear. “My Queen.”

You released your hold on him, sinking down onto him until he was fully inside you. He carried you back to the bed, where instead of throwing each other around, you made what you would call love. However, you still felt the need to be in control of him. To make sure that you were the only one that he was thinking about during these pleasurable moments.

You went on top, straddling him, bouncing yourself up and down in a quick pace. That didn’t however, mean that he could slack off. He thrust upward to meet with your bounces, and his hand went to your clit where he started to rub it slowly at first, then picking up speed. Since he only had experience with one other woman before you, you had to teach him some things. The value of pleasure in that little bundle of nerves was lesson number one and oh how he had learned. His other hand went to your breast, holding it in place rather than letting it go up and down with you, your nipple getting caught between his thumb and his index finger.

You looked down at him throughout, keeping up the eye contact. “I love you, Jon Snow. My true King.”

“I love you, y/n,” He said in return. The words seemed to have a physical effect because before he could even warn you, he cum up inside of you, thrusting hard against his own control.

You rode him out, only slightly disappointed that you weren’t able to finish at the same time. After his moment of pleasure had past, and the sensitivity began did you roll off of him and lay down on the bed, sweaty and tired. “I take that back,” You groaned. “A King would be a gentleman and let their Queen finish.”

“I’m sorry,” Jon breathed, rolling over on his side to kiss your shoulder. “I’ll just make you finish twice next time.”

“Keep this up and there won’t be a next time.”

#Jon Snow #Jon Snow x reader #Jon Snow oneshot #Jon Snow one shot #Game of Thrones #GOT #Game of Thrones oneshot #Game of Thrones one shot #GOT oneshot #GOT one shot #oneshot #one shot #x reader #jons

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laukora1030 · 3 years

Text

Captain America: The First Avenger pt. 2

First off, spoilers if you’ve never seen the movies and you want to. And, english IS NOT my first language, so excuse me if I make mistakes.

Y’all, this specific scene reminds me of that scene where Elastigirl is trapped in all those doors and she kicks the guys’ asses. Like, tell me you saw Steve hitting this guy’s head with the door and your mind didn’t immediately take you to Elastigirl. Or was it only me? Just me? Ok, let’s keep on going.

Nvm, I found out why it reminds me so much of that scene. They’re dressed the same way!

Can we acknowledge how awkward Steve’s interaction with the imprisoned soldiers is? Who told him it was a good idea to say “I’m Captain America” to these people? Although fair, he did get them out rather quickly and he is technically Captain America, but I don’t know, it’s weird. Steeb, you liar, you haven’t knocked Hitler out at all.

I love Steve’s loyalty to Bucky. It gets annoying in the next movies, but in this movie it just shows me how alone Steve was and how important Bucky was to him, because when you have very little people who care for you, your instincts will always be to protect them.

I love the soldiers just wrecking havoc outside. It’s a fun scene seeing them fight back and use HYDRA’s weapons. How much property do you think they destroyed? Because I keep on wondering, did this act of rebellion from Steeb help turn the tide just a little bit?

There is a similarity between Red Skull and future Steve, and that is that, when they believe there is something more important than anything else, they are willing to sacrifice everyone and everything else for that. In this case, Schmidt was ready to destroy the entire base when he realized he was not going to win, just to save the studies, and future Steve was ready to endanger thousands of people to end HYDRA (CATWS), and to save Bucky (CACW).

I feel sad for Bucky. He was tortured back in the 40s, then for 70 years, and then he died and came back to life, how does one survive that? He is one strong man, but I just, his entire life saddens me.

I wonder what Bucky thought after he heard Red Skull call Steve Captain America. I would find it hilarious, even in that situation, but that’s just my weird ass talking. Why did Schmidt think he was Erskine’s greatest success when he looks red and Steve looks like this:

America, explain.

Another note to self: Schmidt is a bitch, but I love his car and I would go back in time to the 40s to steal it.

Bucky is so brave, though. He was tortured, experimented on, completely weak, and still, he put on a brave face and crossed that thing (I have no idea what they’re called) at a steady face, knowing that it could have fallen way before it did. Thanks to the Russo’s I had forgotten how much I loved Bucky Barnes. He is a great character.

Let’s talk about how pure of heart, dumb of ass Steve is. He had no idea he was gonna survive his little stunt jump, yet he did it with little hesitation because “I have to get my friend out of here”. Pure of heart, dumb of ass.

I can’t begin to imagine Peggy’s pain when she heard Phillips say that Steve was dead. Especially because if he was dead it would most definitely mean she would have no protection against whatever punishment Phillips saw fit for her actions. And yet she just won’t back down, because she knew she did the right thing.

The scene where Steve gets back with the 107th is such a great scene, because it shows exactly what Steve is made of. He has a strong mindset, he will fight for what he believes in, and he would do anything for others. It’s a powerful scene.

I wonder if Steve unconsciously wanted the praise he got at that moment. He was the small guy his entire life, the one who was beat and punched on a daily basis, and for once in his life he was being praised for something he thought he deserved. I think that deep down this is exactly what he wanted: recognition.

I wonder if Bucky’s face when Steve stopped looking at him was because he thought he lost his friend, because he was jealous, or because he thought he wasn’t needed anymore. Bucky and Steve grew up together, and when you see a friend you’ve always helped become something better when you’re not with them, I think that can seriously mess you up, especially if you feel like they don’t need you anymore, because, after all, they thrived after you left. I don’t believe he was that jealous, though. Yeah, he used to be the strong guy girls would look at, and now he wasn’t, but I’m inclined to believe it’s my third option. He was so used to going around saving Steve from his death wish (that’s what I call it, because I’m still surprised he survived all those years getting punched), that now he sees Steve save him and save everyone else, and he knows that, were Steve asked to go alone to a fight, he would not be able to do anything.

Steeb, you lil’ bitch, I know you don’t like cameras and stages, but that’s a medal of valour, I think it’s very important.

Can we talk about how hot Steve Rogers looks with his army suit? Because he does. Also, as I’ve said before, he ain’t dumb, so, if everything got enhaced with the serum, he must definitely had his intelligence amplified, and I like to believe that he has photographic memory, that’s why he could remember the map he saw when he saved Bucky.

I’m sorry, but what the fuck Steve? Who gave you permission to look like this?

(You’re welcome)

I like his team. Steve was always a good leader (I’m not even gonna touch CACW), he knew who to trust and who to take with him. Besides, like I said before, he is a great strategist. I think that’s what makes him such a great leader.

I guess I get why y’all ship Stucky. I don’t ship them, I love their friendship (once again, I’m not even gonna touch CACW with a ten miles pole), and I think they’re sweet, so I guess I can understand the ship.

Peggy Carter in a red dress is all I never knew I needed. She looks like a queen that will definitely punch you in the face if you deserve it.

I love the bar scene. The music is lovely, Bucky’s awkwardness is hilarious, Steeb and Peggy flirting is sweet as heck, and Bucky’s “I’m invisible. I’m turning into you, it’s like a horrible dream” it’s the perfect dialogue.

Okay, how did Howard get all of that glass on his face and didn’t get more than one single cut? Is he stronger than he looks or is it just movie magic? I guess we’ll never know.

Awkward Steeb is lovely as heck. But I don’t like the blonde. I guess it’s because I am not a fan of stolen kisses, I feel they would make someone uncomfortable.

Note to self: finally, a movie in sepia tones that isn’t situated in Mexico!

Coming back to the movie: the whole scene with the blonde woman is so freaking awkward. It was totally unnecessary. Like yeah, I get it was to show a jealous Peggy, but ugh, I hate it. Steeb looks son out of his element, it gives me that je ne sais quoi.

Note to self, again: if I ever want to date a woman, make sure not to talk to them the way Steeb did when talking about Peggy and Stark. Steeb, you idiot.

Gotta go back on track.

Stark said

The scene where Peggy shoots Steve’s shield used to make me laugh so hard when I was younger. Now it makes me irrationally angry. Peggy more so than anyone should know that bullets ricochet, she was lucky she that the bullets didn’t hit someone else after hitting the shield and just fell to the floor.

Three things about the different scenes after this last one, the one where Steve and the Howling Commandos raid all HYDRA and Nazi bases they can: Steve looks so cool on his suit, I love Red Skull’s car, and the Howling Commandos are amazing.

This is still sweet:

Bucky Barnes with a rifle could kill me any day, thank you. Also, I love this scene, it’s such an emblematic CA scene:

Oh oh, the train scene’s coming up next. What do I do now? Do I watch it, do I cry, do I suffer in silence (evidently no)? I was not prepared for this. I regret all my decisions up till this moment.

I’m never gonna get tired of saying that Steve is an amazing strategist. Just so y’all know, if it was me over the train, I would’ve already fallen to my inevitable death. Is it already clear enough that I love James Barnes more than I probably should? No? Then excuse me while I scream into the void aout how much I love this man. Also, him with short hair? 100/10 would recommend again.

I love how battered (I think I used the right word) Steve’s shield is. It’s a representation of his battles and it’s, I don’t know, it’s calling me. I guess I love when something shows everything they’ve gone through.

Ahhhhhh, THAT part is coming and I’m not ready!!!!! James Barnes, if you read this, I love you. It’s a painful scene to watch, if I’m being honest. Steve loves this man, in my opinion, as a brother, and seeing him at death’s door, you can see the pain on their expressions, one knows they’re gonna die, and the other one knows they’re gonna lose their brother. I don’t think I’d be the same person if that happened to me. And Steve’s cries, bitch, my heart.

That killed me, sorry.

I still admire Zola’s intelligence, and his sneakiness with the whole SHIELDRA thing. Like, I hate that bitch and I hope he died a very painful death, but he is a great character and I enjoy his scenes.

Who eats steak with milk? I just wanna know, find me behind the Denny’s.

I like the whole Zola and phillips scene, it makes sense, because of course he’d want to live. But tell me how you look at someone in the eyes and expect them to believe some bullshit about gods and infinite power? At least Phillip took the whole “his goal is everything” comment, because I sure as hell wouldn’t’ve.

Red Skull’s little speech about the Valkyrie is okay, I guess, but he mentions something that reminded me strongly of CATWS. He said “If they shoot down one plane, hundreds more will rain fire upon them.” I’m just thinking about the Helicarriers that were supposed to just, ya know, kill everyone that posed a threat to HYDRA. I think it’s a good parallel.

Note to self, again: I’m not gonna get tired of asking who was the idiot who decided to name this division HYDRA, made their slogan “if they cut off one head, two more shall take its place” then had their logo be an octopus without two extremities. Who do I have to fight?

I love the scene where everyone is screaming Hail HYDRA, because it shows you that, like Steve, Schmidt has presence, and a powerful voice, and he knows how to make people share his ideals. I enjoy it very much.

I feel sorry for Steve. I, listening to him talk to Peggy when he clearly has been crying, telling her that he cannot get drunk, which means that he’s tried it already, it’s a painful scene to watch. Chris Evans is such an amazing actor. He can emulate feelings so easily. Seeing him cry and suffer, God, it pains my heart. I honestly didn’t remember this scene, and to watch it without warning, well, it made me sadder than Bucky’s actual death.

“I’m not gonna stop until ol of HYDRA is dead or captured.” Brings a new light to CATWS for me, what about you?

I will leave it here, mostly because this shit is getting longer than I expected it to be. Anyway, I hope you guys enjoy this as much as I did. See you tomorrow.

#mcu #marvel cinematic universe #marvel #captain america #CATFA #steve rogers #the first avenger #character analysis #peggy carter #bucky barnes #i honestly thank you if you got here #love y'all #hope you enjoy this

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trilliastra · 4 years

Text

[Here, have a fluffy Xicheng fic where Jiang Cheng is loved and treasured by everyone.]

Yu Da lost his sight almost forty years ago, trying to protect his Sect from rogue cultivators. He was deemed, then, a useless fighter, but his brain still worked well enough so he was assigned as Madam Yu's adviser, her only ally, as she moved to Lotus Pier. He survived the massacre, helped hide the children in the forest, trusting his ears and his Golden Core to keep them from harm until Jiang Cheng found him and the children months later as he reclaimed his Sect, the group weak and starving, but alive nonetheless.

He was the first cultivator to recognize Jiang Cheng as a Leader, the one who bowed to him, thanked him for coming back for them and not giving up on his people. Yu Da was there on the aftermath of the Sunshot Campaign, giving orders when Jiang Cheng was locked in his room, grieving his sister's death and his brother's fall, shielding Jiang Cheng from the stares and the gossip.

Jiang Cheng held Yu Da in the highest respect and Yu Da, in return, was fiercely protective of his Sect Leader. Just like, Lan Xichen would come to realize, the rest of the Jiang Sect.

“Master Yu,” Lan Xichen bows deeply. Despite being in the company of a Sect Leader, the man does not stand up, only nods in return, polite, and gestures to the chair on his left. Lan Xichen understands the message clearly, this is his Yu Da’s house, his Sect, and Lan Xichen is merely a guest and will be continue to be treated as such until he proves his worth.

Lan Xichen smiles, “Master Yu,” he repeats, “I’d like to marry Jiang Cheng.” He announces, makes sure not to word it as a question. He’s not asking permission, Jiang Cheng does not need to be shielded from the world, but he should be treated with respect, care and love.

Master Yu arches an eyebrow, takes a sip of his tea and hums quietly. “He’s a special man.”

“Yes.” Lan Xichen agrees immediately. He did not notice it at first, did not want to notice. He admits Wangji’s distaste for the man helped cloud his judgement, but he’s seeing clearly now. “Yes, he is.”

“He’s strong, opinionated and easy to anger.” The man keeps saying.

Lan Xichen nods. “He has flaws. But he also has virtues.” His kindness, his spirit, his dedication. “I admire his strength.” Lan Xichen confesses. It was one of the first things he noticed, after what happened at the Temple. He was hurt, both physically and mentally, but he still held his ground, kept doing his work because he knew that his Sect had no one else, that his people depended on him, while Lan Xichen went on Seclusion, left his brother and his uncle to do his job.

He had never realized how privileged he was, and how lonely Jiang Cheng must have felt during those long years, without parents, siblings or friends.

If only Lan Xichen could turn back time, if only he could have done his job better.

“Guilt is not a good enough reason for a marriage.” Master Yu says, making Lan Xichen flinch. “Sect Leader Jiang, my boy,” he stresses, “deserves love and not pity.”

“I would never.” Lan Xichen promises. He thought about it so much, meditated, wondered and cried, for months when he first realized his feelings.

He was wrong once, he did not wish to repeat his mistakes, but Jiang Cheng – oh how could Lan Xichen not fall in love with a man so selfless, who would give up everything for those he loves, who did give up plenty for his brother, for his nephew, for his father.

An honest man, a brave leader, a lonely boy.

Master Yu does not say anything else, only waits patiently, for Lan Xichen to sort out his words. “I wish to make him happy.” Lan Xichen confesses. “To take care of him, to share his burdens. And to see him smile.” Jiang Cheng’s smiles are usually reserved for Jin Ling, but Lan Xichen is confident on his ability to make him laugh. He’s been doing it for the past few months.

“I hope, Sect Leader Lan, that you do make him happy.” Master Yu says, and Lan Xichen understands it as the threat it is. “And I hope he makes you happy as well.” He offers, at last, before standing up and shaking off the disciple trying to help him. “May your marriage be blessed.”

“Thank you.” Lan Xichen stands up as well, watches him move to greet the children playing in the yard. As he tries to follow him outside, Lan Xichen is stopped by a group of disciples, not one of them trying to hide their glares.

“We have a message from Sect Leader Jin,” one of them says.

“He respects you tremendously,” another offers, “but he will not tolerate seeing Sect Leader Jiang hurt. Accidentally or otherwise.”

Lan Xichen swallows heavily, equal parts impressed and intimidated. Jin Ling might have forgiven him for his part on Jin Guangyao’s death, but he will surely not forget. And when it comes to Jiang Cheng, the man who raised him and who loves him fiercely, Lan Xichen does not doubt Jin Ling would raise hell.

The disciples give him one last warning look before joining Master Yu outside and Lan Xichen feels his heart swell with affection for these people. Jiang Cheng really has no idea how much he’s loved and it breaks his heart to think about that.

He must change this immediately.

“Where have you been?” Jiang Cheng asks, looking up from his papers when Lan Xichen joins him in his office.

Lan Xichen doesn’t answer immediately, takes his time admiring the man he wants to spend the rest of his life with. Jiang Cheng rolls his eyes when Lan Xichen smiles, still not used to being watched tenderly.

When he was in seclusion, the first time Jiang Cheng visited him was awkward. Lan Xichen was angry, hurt, had spent countless nights awake, thinking about his mistakes and his bad decisions so the last person he needed to see was Jiang Cheng – the man who nearly lost everything because of Jin Guangyao.

“I do not blame you.” It was the first thing Jiang Cheng had said. “And I don’t hate you any more than I hated Wei Wuxian.” Lan Xichen had flinched, lowering his gaze as the other man stood in front of him, fierce stare, honest words. “You might have been naïve, but he tricked all of us. There’s no use thinking about the past and the things you could have done, should have seen. You can’t go back, you can only move forward and hope not to make the same mistakes again.” Lan Xichen remembers feeling incredibly pathetic, crying in front of a man who had stayed strong through the hardships of his life, who had every reason to be angry and still willingly tried to help others. “If you close yourself now, you will miss on the good things. Like watching your Sect grow, your people smile, and your brother getting married.” Jiang Cheng had pointed out, a hint of regret on his voice. Lan Xichen watched him go, a new-found admiration for the man.

One week later he was back to being Sect Leader Lan to his people. Two months after that, he became Lan Huan to Jiang Cheng. And soon, hopefully, he will be Jiang Cheng’s husband.

The thought makes him smile, excited. “Wanyin,” he says, reaching out for Jiang Cheng’s hands. The man lets himself be pulled into a hug, not before making a questioning noise, “I love you.”

“I know.” Jiang Cheng answers, confused. “I love you, too.” He whispers. It’s getting easier for him to say the words, Lan Xichen notices.

“I love you so much.” Lan Xichen keeps saying, pulling back to look him in the eye. He kisses him slowly, tenderly and smiles. “And I want to marry you.”

He watches Jiang Cheng’s eyes widen and he takes a step back, surprised, and perhaps, confused? “You – Lan Huan –”

“I do.” Lan Xichen interrupts. “I would not have gone to meet Master Yu Da if I didn’t.”

“You did not.” Jiang Cheng narrows his eyes. “You told him – you –”

“Yes, I did.” Lan Xichen answers, cheerfully, not letting go of Jiang Cheng’s hands. “He threatened me, and so did Jin Ling, and a couple of disciples as well.”

Jiang Cheng blushes, looks away. “I should have words with them –”

“Don’t.” Lan Xichen laughs, pressing a kiss on each of Jiang Cheng’s hands. “They are looking out for you.”

“You are a Sect Leader.” Jiang Cheng insists. He’s still not looking at him and Lan Xichen feels like his heart is about to leave his body, it’s beating so fast.

“Wanyin,” he calls, patiently, always patient. If Jiang Cheng is not ready, he will wait. If Jiang Cheng refuses, he will leave. But if Jiang Cheng is willing – “my love –”

“I am not good enough for you.” Jiang Cheng says. Lan Xichen is about to argue with him because that could not be more untrue, when Jiang Cheng turns to look at him, determined. “But if you think I am, if you really want to marry me, then – then I believe you.” He nods.

Lan Xichen smiles, circles his arms around Jiang Cheng’s waist. “Would that make you as happy as it would make me?”

“Yes.” Jiang Cheng answers, immediately. “Nothing would make me happier.”

Oh, oh, Lan Xichen laughs, openly. “Then I shall be your husband.”

“And I shall be yours.” Jiang Cheng adds, smiling as well.

And they will be happy.

#xicheng #jiang cheng x lan xichen #the untamed #mdzs #mo dao zu shi #my fic

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darkpoisonouslove · 3 years

Note

I'm offering you an empty salt shaker - asks 2, 5, 6, 15 (go ahead, I know you have something XD), 16, 20, 25 (about Bloom searching for her parents storyline)

Starting this again because guess who accidentally hit the key combination for undo and lost half an answered ask! This bitch right here.

I answered 2 here.

5. Has fandom ever ruined a pairing for you?*

Not that I can think of. It’s usually the source material that ruins things and fandom is tasked with fixing them later.

6. Has fandom ever made you enjoy a pairing you previously hated?*

I didn’t hate it but Bloom x Icy was incomprehensible to me. Fics helped a lot and so did other posts from here and there and I can see it now. Also, I totally couldn’t see Griffin x Codatorta but that changed, too. Though, that was less fandom and more trashcankitty12 with an ask that made me think about it a little more in-depth so it was pretty much me roping up myself into yet another ship. But ooh, I also don’t think I had considered Palladium x Avalon before fandom but, yes, indeed, it is right there in canon. And I was so puzzled over the Riven x Nabu content I was seeing but after watching seasons 3 and 4, I can totally see where this is coming from. The people are right. That is a bromance right there.

15. Unpopular opinion about the manga/show?

I have no idea what is popular and what isn’t (but you’re right that I have something aka A LOT) so I’ll just list my strong opinionsTM, okay? I will try not to dump on Bloom too much also because it is not a secret that I don’t like her so there is no need for me to go in too much detail.

4kids is the superior dub. That is probably the most controversial opinion I hold. But don’t worry, I’ll try to top it and up the ante. XD

I love Enchantix but it has so many flaws as a concept and even more as an execution and the thing that is really pissing me off is how obviously centered around Bloom’s arc it is. It was clearly created for the advancement of her character and the other girls’ stories came as an afterthought which is why Tecna’s Enchantix was total bullshit. And for having a transformation that is specifically created around Bloom, hers was bullshit as well. I think they should have let her reearn it in order for her to be able to use all of its functions like miniaturizing. Also also, at so many points it totally sounds like Bloom is not upset about the fact that Domino and all of its people were destroyed but about the fact that that means she won’t get her Enchantix. Which btw was a hasty conclusion because at the time Enchantix became a thing, she was still on a mission to find her parents which would have definitely been a way to earn her Enchantix and she had a sign that they were alive. So her angsting over not getting an Enchantix because of what happened on Domino was bad form on the writers’ part.

That spell for good decisions in 1x05 was one of the show’s lowest and most ridiculous moments. It was only included to flaunt in your face how naturally being a leader comes to Bloom because “See? See!!!!!! She can make a good decision without using magic to help her!” So can the majority of the population (note that we are talking about ONE good decision, not an unbreakable sequence of such). She ain’t all that special. Plus, Tecna was written wildly OOC there in order to boost Bloom’s stats so to speak. I’m sorry but Tecna would’ve known that three against four doesn’t give them advantage since they are freshmen and the Trix were seniors at the time. God, that scene was stupid.

Flora is the most boring character in seasons 1-3, fight me about it.

The writers totally had no idea what they were doing with the witches throughout most of season 1 which is why Griffin’s characterization in that season is so inconsistent. Also, wtf was that in 1x06? She straight up tried to kill a bunch of 15-year-old girls. Take a chill pill! I’m glad they figured out a much better balance with her later on.

Not using the fact that Cloud Tower is a living organism more was a fucking wasted opportunity. Especially in season 3 when Valtor took over it. That could have made everything so much better. Also, the witches should have been used more. They were interesting but deserved so much better in terms of development.

Sky should have just fucking died in 2x10. What were these resurrections and Bloom getting healing powers out of nowhere for a total of 5 seconds? You know, that could have been a good setup for a Bloom x Diaspro romance. It would have been so much better if they’d gotten together right after 1x17 and dumped Sky’s sorry ass. Also, Diaspro deserved better.

Riven is the best Specialist but he is especially better than Sky. Remember 1x22 when he was trying to escape CT? He was trapped deep in enemy territory with monsters everywhere and so high above the ground, yet he found his way out. Sky would’ve fucking died out in the open at Magix against one single monster if Bloom hadn’t shown up to rescue him. And the show has the gall to imply that Sky is a better Specialist than Riven is? Please!

The teachers should be fined and sued for emotional and physical damage they haven’t protected their students from. Especially the Alfea teachers who in 1x02 practically admitted that the witches might maim a fairy and they still won’t do shit about it. Nice one!

Griffin and Valtor is canonical subtext and I have nothing more to say about this. It is all there.

Valtor up until 3x18 and Valtor from 3x19 to 3x26 are two different people and the prior is superior in every way. The show ruined him in the last third of the season because there was no other way for Winx to defeat him.

Speaking about Valtor, his whole thing with the Trix is despicable and I hate it so much. It is extremely cringy on their part and extremely underhanded on his and I can’t stand it. Not to mention that it is wildly OOC for the Trix because they are obviously better than that.

I cannot understand saying that Bloom x Valtor is love-hate. I see only hate.

It is ridiculous how easily the Trix beat Griffin in season 6 and how they nearly take control over CT in season 2. And it is also ridiculous that she had to wait for Winx to unspell CT in season 3. She is a teacher, the headmistress of the most prestigious school for witches, a veteran and has been Valtor’s partner (and he himself admitted that together they were unstoppable which means that she has to be pretty powerful and even somewhere close to his level of power). Can the show stop acting like she is defenseless?

The teachers should have been used more. It would’ve been so much better if they were there to at least help Winx if not lead their battles. And it would have made much more sense. Also, how come Ediltrude and Zarathustra literally disappear when it’s convenient and then reappear again (like they did in season 1 when the witches went to Alfea)? That’s just bad writing.

Sky is adopted. He doesn’t resemble Erendor or Samara neither in appearance, nor in character and I hate them enough to headcanon that he was adopted but nobody knows because they don’t want to have claims that he is not an “official” heir of the throne because he isn’t part of the bloodline.

Mike and Vanessa are much more parents to Bloom than Marion and Oritel are, especially when the latter were first released from Obsidian, and the fact that Bloom starts calling them Mike and Vanessa instead of mom and dad after she learns she has other parents is abysmal. Also, they are literally the best parents ever and I love them to death. (I also like Marion and Oritel but Mike and Vanessa are definitely the superior pair of parents if we’re ranking them. I like the idea that the two couples are actually super close and love each other like relatives, in fact.)

What the fuck is up with the magic in this show? There is literally, like, NO FUCKING CONSISTENCY WHATSOEVER! You can’t blink without the rules of it changing in some way. But what am I saying? That would imply that there are any rules which is just not true. Also, there is no clear distinction of how powerful anyone is after season 1. The balance of powers especially between Winx and the Trix is pretty much whatever works for the episode. Same for Winx vs Valtor. The fuckery on that account is unreal. Plus, some of Bloom’s major power explosions happen due to her getting angry. According to the official Wiki - “While practicing or harnessing positive magic, one must keep a compassionate heart, primarily by keeping their thoughts and feelings clear of all negativity, making them capable of attracting positive energy more easily. Thus, if one is plagued with negative thoughts or feelings such as sadness, anger or fear, then their magic will grow weaker until they may even be left incapable of casting magic until said feelings pass.“ Read that and then read it again, let it sink in. According to the rules of the Winx universe, during some of Bloom’s most powerful moments she was actually using dark magic, not light such because it was fueled by rage. Way to keep it fucking consistent. And that is not just Bloom! FLORA out of all people attacks the Trix in rage in 3x12 when they hurt her sister aka she was also using dark magic at that situation (and then you have Wizgiz scolding Mirta for it in SotLK like it is a sin to use dark magic, smh). In some instances I would argue that it was more of determination to protect rather than anger which I would say would still result in light magic. But The Flora thing, Bloom vs Stormy in 1x09 (Bloom even says she got so angry so that was not a case of protectiveness), Bloom vs Icy in 1x26 and Bloom vs Valtor in 3x14 were definitely rage aka dark magic. And then Bloom is all “fairies don’t have any demons”. Guess again, bitch! Also, writers, you need a dictionary to start comprehending the words you are actually writing?

Now that I think of it, the whole arc in the Resort Realm was bullshit. If it is a magic-free realm, nobody should have any magic in it, period! What is this bullshit that you can use Charmix and Gloomix there because they have higher magical energy? That absolutely doesn’t matter! If there isn’t any magic in the entire realm, having a higher amount of magic in you will not matter because you still can’t use it... because there isn’t any in the realm!!!!!! What the hell! Honestly, the writers can’t comprehend what words mean and that is not the only instance in which it shows.

Someone told me that SotLK is better than Magical Adventure and I don’t mean to offend but that is simply not true. Magical Adventure is leagues above SotLK even if it has some structural problems. Like, literally everything is better. Bloom and Sky are even likable and communicate!!!!!!!! Literally when have you ever seen a better moment for their relationship than in Magical Adventure? If it had been all like that, I would have liked them as a couple.

I think I got everything that comes to mind rn out. Might think of more at some point. I was done and then came back to rage some more because I remembered I had more material.

16. If you could change anything in the show, what would you change?

I would have them make smart decisions because 99% of the shit they pull is so stupid it is unreal. I literally cannot tell how they are still alive. Oh, no wait! Plot armor. Yep, that’s it.

But if I had to pick something specific? Bring Nabu back. I sure as hell wouldn’t have killed him. That was an asshole move and I have no idea what the hell the writers were thinking when they wrote that.

And my second choice is - implement a magical system into the series because there isn’t one. Magic always works the way the writers need it to work to pull off their bullshit plot even if it contradicts everything that we’ve seen before. Please, for the love of god! Consistency is already dead; stop stabbing its corpse!!!!

20. What is the purest ship in the fandom?

Purest ship? Lmao, asking me this question is underhanded. XD If you mean no drama, then Flora and Helia Mike and Vanessa. But I think my actual answer would be Griffin x Faragonda because they have been through so much that we know of or we can deduce and they still stuck together. Sure, they had their ups and downs but it is obviously a love for life that has lasted through so many obstacles and keeps lasting. The reason why I can’t say the same for Mike and Vanessa is because we don’t really know that much about their relationship with each other. But anyway I love both these ships so much.

If you’re talking about a canon ship, though, then Brandon and Stella (I do not recognize the stupid relationship drama in season 4 as canon). He did lie to her about his identity in season 1 but it was for his friendship with Sky (alternatively, for his job and duty as Sky’s squire). I just love how obviously in love Brandon is with Stella and how much Stella doesn’t care about anything but him. She didn’t care that he was a “commoner” and - one of my fave moments - in 1x08 she only cared about his well-being rather than the competition. It was adorable and they are adorable and I love them so much. Pure serotonin, right there!

25. How would you end the Bloom searching for her parents storyline/Would you change the ending?

I would certainly change the logistics of the whole thing because, boy, did it make no sense at all. As for the actual ending, I’d argue that physically finding them is not the end of that storyline and she needs to “find” them emotionally as well which would definitely take more time than SotLK cared to address. Like, she got them out of Obsidian and boom, everything’s fine! She literally doesn’t know them! Those are her parents and she doesn’t know anything about them! Their touch and their voices are unfamiliar to her even and they have missed on so much that they will never be able to get back and you’re saying that everything is fine? Yeah, right.

I would have had her spend a year on Domino with them before season 4. The school year that started in SotLK? She spends that with them. Possibly even the one that starts in Magical Adventure as well. She learns everything she can about them and the family history. She also learns how to be a proper royal because she is the Crown Princess now and she has no idea what the fuck she is doing. I would have made seasons 4 and possibly 5 about that and added more politics in it. Layla and Stella are also princesses who will run their kingdoms one day so we could have had adventures in political relations with Winx Club. They are pretty famous so I am sure there would be rulers of other lands that see them as threats and don’t like them. There could have been tension about that and the whole thing with Domino being the planet of the Dragon Fire could have been addressed. Who would dare oppose them when they are the most powerful force? Are they the most powerful force after the 17 years the planet spent as an ice block? Are there old alliances to be reforged? What is the political climate in the Magic Dimension? All absolutely fascinating questions that would have helped the worldbuilding and made place for Marion and Oritel in Bloom’s life and in the show. We could’ve gone back to the feel of season 1 when they also had other things going on besides the big baddie of the season and it could have been a little more episodical with a loose theme to connect the season and the overarching story of Bloom finding her parents and her place in the world she was born in. That could have been positively epic... And a great way to retain the cast because the Company of Light were allegedly friends so we could have seen Marion and Oritel reconnecting with Griffin, Faragonda, Saladin and Hagen. There could have been resurfacing debates left over from the war. Kingdoms angry at Domino for something that happened back then in order to include flashbacks with the events. AND that would work out with the fact that the Ancestral Witches were still around and could have led to another epic battle that wouldn’t end with the destruction of a whole planet. Like I said, there were amazing possibilities... and they were all wasted.

Well, this was long... and just what I needed. I hope some (civilized) discussion will spark out of that because I am tired of screaming in a void and I want people to talk to me.

#winx club #anti bloom #anti sky #too many opinions to tag #meta #winx club meta #ask #her-majesty-wears-jeans #winx griffin

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mordoriscalling · 3 years

Text

Everything I Am, All That You Are (4/4)

Geraskier Soulmate AU, Modern with Magic, Post-Break Up, Getting Back Together

The last word of the song – “alone” – rings out in the silence in the concert hall. Jaskier’s voice is so resonating, so haunting, that Geralt has to put a great effort into walking away from it.

Then, he feels it. An unmistakable, soul-deep kind of touch.

His mate reached out to him through their bond.

Geralt sways on his feet and leans against the wall of the concert hall in order not to trip and fall. He looks back at the stage, meaning to catch Jaskier’s eye, but Jaskier stares at the seat Geralt has vacated a moment ago.

The audience erupts into roaring applause, giving Jaskier and Essi a standing ovation, which is definitely well-deserved. A performance like that is worthy of glowing reviews.

Geralt snaps out of the initial shock and strides out of the hall, spurred on by hope, now even more determined to carry out the plan that sprung into his mind when he talked to Yennefer earlier. It’s an excuse to talk to Jaskier, just a conversation starter, but it’s also something that Geralt has owed him for a long time.

He walks through the door which Jaskier disappeared behind after their first conversation this evening. It takes him to an empty corridor. In the quiet he meets, he’s able to catch the characteristic hustle and bustle that happens backstage. He follows the sounds until he finds himself in an environment that he’s rather familiar with.

After they bonded, Geralt used to wait backstage when Jaskier performed. Jaskier would come to him the moment he finished a set and ask for a review. Geralt would always respond in a similar way; it was an inside joke between them after years of Geralt giving Jaskier “three words or less”.

“How was my singing?”Jaskier asks, sweaty but grinning, as he greets Geralt with a peck on the cheek.

Geralt smiles. Through their bond, he shows Jaskier all the admiration and appreciation he has for his singing. It was a fantastic concert at a huge venue and Geralt is so immensely proud of how far his Songbird has come. He doesn’t put it into words, however, only leans down and starts nosing at the point on Jaskier’s throat where he’s the most ticklish.

Jaskier lets out a long squeal, high-pitched and delighted. “You can’t avoid giving me a review every time!” he laughs.

Geralt hums, then lays a kiss on Jaskier’s neck, then another, and another, enjoying the shivers he elicits.

With a breathy chuckle, Jaskier says, “One day, I will get a detailed opinion out of you.”

That day has finally come.

Geralt looks for Jaskier frantically but can’t find him anywhere. The hope that powered him starts plummeting now, making his stomach drop. Every minute of searching drags on like torture. In his desperation, Geralt intimidates some man into telling him where Jaskier is.

Following the directions leading him to a musical storeroom, Geralt feels his heart beat unnaturally fast for a witcher. He can hear it hammering in his chest as he rushes to the room, but when he barrels through the door and finally sees his mate, everything goes silent.

Amidst all the various instruments, there’re Essi and Jaskier, sitting next to each other on two chairs. In the cool light of the lamps, Jaskier looks almost deathly pale, with his hands cradled in his lap. He’s a picture of devastated.

When their eyes meet, Jaskier jerks in clear surprise

Before Geralt can lose the ability to speak yet again, he blurts out, “Your performance was stunning.” Jaskier blinks. Geralt swallows hard and goes on, “You command the crowd as well as you always have. Your control over your voice shows your mastery. I could hear everything you wished to convey.” Pain and plea. “You sounded...” Heart-wrenching, vulnerable, enchanting – “Beautiful.”

Jaskier hasn’t moved an inch, hasn’t looked away from him for a second. Geralt, flustered by the lack of response, turns to Essi. “I enjoyed your song,” he tells her, “The lyrics and the delivery were remarkable, and your voice is memorable.”

The girl inclines her head in thanks but her expression is stormy.

Geralt directs his gaze back to his mate, who eyes him cautiously.

“Thank you,” Jaskier murmurs, “I appreciate your review.”

Geralt waits for him to say anything more but Jaskier doesn’t add a word. Taking a deep breath, he forces the words out, “Jaskier, I – I need to talk to you. Alone.”

Jaskier sighs. He and Essi have a wordless conversation that consists of making various faces and gestures. Finally, the girl relents and gets up to leave. When she passes Geralt, she glares daggers into him.

After the door shuts behind her, heavy silence hangs in the room. Geralt takes a few careful steps towards Jaskier and, as he approaches, he notices that Jaskier holds something in his hands – a bowl of strawberries. He freezes

Jaskier smiles wryly, noticing his shock. “Oh, I was just...” He trails off, takes one strawberry and eats a small bite.

Geralt watches intently. The way Jaskier’s lips close around the fruit brings his mind back to all those times when Jaskier ate strawberries from his hand. He would lick Geralt’s fingers until they were clean of juice and Jaskier would suck at them, swirling his tongue around the tip, whispering husky praises like “you take such good care of me, my beautiful Wolf” or “you’re such a good mate, my love”.

As Jaskier finishes eating the strawberry, Geralt longs to hear the enthusiastic praise. He wants to go down on his knees and be at Jaskier’s command until he earns the gasped “just like that” and the moaned, “fuck, you’re so good”.

His hunger carries him the rest of the way. Geralt crosses the remaining distance between them and kneels at his mate’s feet. He hears how Jaskier’s breath hitches and his heartbeat stutters. Jaskier’s pupils dilate and his scent is tinged with arousal.

For a moment, Geralt can only close his eyes and cherish the fact that he can experience Jaskier’s body like this. He’s so relieved to be able to hear his mate’s heart and sense his scent that he could weep. Jaskier’s voice snaps him out of the joy.

“What are you doing?” he demands sharply.

Geralt sighs. Slowly, he takes the bowl out of Jaskier’s hands and puts it on the empty chair next to them. When he finally looks into Jaskier’s eyes, he says, “I want to apologize. To tell you that... life has already given me one blessing.” He puts his palms on Jaskier’s knees. “It’s you.”

“What are you playing at?” Jaskier snaps, his biting tone making Geralt flinch. “First, you don’t talk to me for years, then you show up here out of the blue, being all distant. When I reach out to you, you don’t respond, but now you’re being all touchy and lovely? What the fuck do you even want from me? Don’t you have a partner and a child to come back to?”

Every question is like a painful strike. Geralt clenches his fists, now placed in Jaskier’s lap, and utters, “I’m not bonded to Yen anymore. She found another Djin and we wished for the bond to be broken.”

Jaskier’s whole body tenses, then relaxes. “Oh,” he says quietly, “That’s... good?”

Geralt can’t help but chuckle. “Yes,” he replies, smiling up at his mate, “That’s very good. We’re both free now.”

Jaskier’s expression is bright like the sun but turns cloudy after a moment. “You stayed together, though,” he mutters, his voice dripping with bitterness.

“Not like that,” Geralt denies, with a vehement shake of his head. He shifts even closer to Jaskier so that his torso is pressed to Jaskier’s legs. “She’s Ciri’s mother and my friend, that’s it.” Drowning in the beloved shade of blue, he confesses, “Wolves mate for life.”

Jaskier purses his lips. For a minute, he’s silent. When he speaks, he asks, “If I’m your mate, why did you leave me for four years? When was the wish broken, by the way?”

“Five months ago.”

There’s the spark of anger in Jaskier’s gaze again. “And you still didn’t think to, I don’t know, give me a sign? A single thought through the bond, perhaps? Just... anything. Why did you make me wait?”

“I thought you wouldn’t want to see me,” Geralt admits, “after everything.”

Jaskier stands up so abruptly that he knocks the chair over. “Wouldn’t want to see you?!” he shouts, gesturing with fury, “Wouldn’t want to see you?! I was dying inside the whole time!” Geralt gets up himself and tries to get a word in but Jaskier rants on, “Everything I am is bound to all that you are and you... You have no idea how I felt. Four years of agony, thinking that you would never want me again – ”

“Of course I know!” Geralt bellows, “Of course I know, Jaskier, dammit!” He walks right into Jaskier’s personal space and growls, “Of course I know your pain. I’ve felt all of it and worse. It’s all my fucking fault!”

“No, it’s not!” Jaskier retorts, “We’ve talked about this. All three of us fucked up with the Djin!”

“What about the dragon hunt? Fuck, the things I said to you –”

“Did you mean them?” Jaskier cuts in, his stare hard and cold.

“No,” Geralt denies, “I was angry. It was all... too much. I couldn’t deal with it, I wanted to be left alone.”

“So I left,” Jaskier replies simply. “I hoped you’d find me, though, soon after.”

Geralt steps away from him and bows his head, hiding his face in his hair. Jaskier's words remind him why he didn't do exactly that. The shame of how he’s hurt his very soulmate returns to him with full force; it’s searing hot, just as strong as it was after he returned from the dragon hunt.

The flat is so quiet. In the silence, Roach’s whine resonates all the more.

Geralt sighs. He doesn’t have to move from the bed – their bed – to guess what the dog is doing. He knows that she’s sitting by the door to their flat, waiting.

“He’s not coming back!” he growls.

In response, the pitbull whimpers.

His eyes are starting to prickle so he closes them. The sheets still smell of Jaskier. He puts his head on Jaskier’s pillow and breathes in, trying to fill the gaping hole in his chest.

Most of Jaskier’s things are gone. The moment his scent fades away, Geralt will have nothing left of him. Nothing but a few books and the mark on his heart. With his fingers, Geralt traces the lines on the songbird’s wings, spread wide, and lets out a ragged breath.

His Songbird flew away, because Geralt made him. His words were so fucking stupid, he wants to cease to exist at the thought of having uttered them.

Roach gives a long, miserable howl. Internally, Geralt does the same.

Geralt swallows the feeling down. “I was too ashamed,” he admits quietly, “Thought that you’d be better off without me.” Jaskier scoffs and opens his mouth but Geralt talks over him, “Then I found Ciri and we stumbled into Yen and... Ciri wanted her with us but living together was difficult, with the wish. I couldn’t subject you to it.”

Jaskier’s expression is stony. He stands there, amidst all the instruments, motionless, glaring at the floor with his hands on his hips. “Did you sleep with her?” he murmurs.

The question sets Geralt off. “Who the fuck do you take me for?!” he barks, “I’m capable of restraining myself!”

Jaskier laughs, of all things. It’s a mirthless, ugly sound. “More than capable, it seems,” he remarks.

“What’s that supposed to mean?”

“I can’t believe you still haven’t learned your lesson,” Jaskier replies, seizing Geralt with a fiery look. “Can’t you really see it, Geralt? Every time you try to spare someone your presence, every time you don’t want to subject someone to your person, it brings pain not only to you but to everyone involved?!” He aims a pointing finger at Geralt and hurls the accusations on, “You wanted to undo the Law of Surprise and the Djin wish went to absolute shit! You didn’t claim your Child Surprise and she didn’t have anyone when her family was killed! You avoided me after the dragon hunt and made us both suffer!”

Geralt is rendered speechless but his lack of response seems to go unnoticed.

“Of course you were on your self-sacrificing bullshit!” Jaskier spits. “Gods, I should’ve known! How the hell didn’t I put two to two? Fuck, all that time when I was wallowing in my own hurt, you were stuck hating yourself more than anyone else could ever hate you.”

The last statement rings too true. The accuracy of it is nearly oppressive, and the following silence is unbearably heavy. Geralt brushes a hand over his face; his body suddenly reminds him of how tired he is.

Jaskier appears just as weary when he asks, “Why didn’t you talk to me? You could’ve just talked to me.”

Geralt wants to laugh at Jaskier’s naivety. All the accusations he’s heard start sinking in and, however right they could be, hurt. The instinct to strike back combines with rage unfurling inside him and Geralt lashes out before he can stop himself.

“And what?” he snaps. “Hear that it’s fine? Have you tell me that I shouldn’t worry when there was so much pain in your eyes? That I don’t have to be sorry when you were so fucking desperate for normalcy? That there’s nothing to forgive when you got so quiet after my fights with Yen? You tried so hard to pretend that everything was all right but you looked like you just waited for us to fall apart.”

Pain flashes in Jaskier’s eyes and Geralt knows he’s taken it too far.

“What else was I supposed to do?!” Jaskier exclaims, his voice cracking, “I didn’t know how to reach you, whenever you got so distant. I tried every way I knew but nothing worked. Nothing. You were hidden so deeply within yourself that I couldn’t –”

“There was nothing you could’ve done,” Geralt cuts in. He knows he’s being cruel but he feels so ugly right now, he may as well show all his monstrosity. “Sometimes there’s nothing you can do,” he tells Jaskier, “I know you’re used to getting your way, that exerting your influence and charm grants you whatever you want, but there are some battles you can’t win.”

“Really, Geralt?” Jaskier snarls, his teeth bared, “Really? Are actually a masochistic bastard? Are you trying to tell me that I shouldn’t have fought for you? That I should’ve just left you after Rinde? Should’ve just... given up? Or are you saying that this” – he gestures between them – “is a lost cause?”

The mere suggestion extinguishes all his anger in an instant. Instead, panic sets in; there’s decisive sadness in Jaskier’s eyes.

“That’s not true –” Geralt begins but to his horror, his mate doesn’t listen.

“But maybe it is,” Jaskier insist, “Maybe I’ll never win against your penchant for self-hatred. It’s been drilled so deeply into you, that you’re unworthy of love. I tried so hard to convince you but perhaps there’s indeed nothing I can do.”

The terrible resignation in Jaskier’s posture appears so final that a cold spear of fear pierces Geralt’s heart. He walks up to Jaskier so that he stands in Jaskier’s way to the door; he can’t bear to lose him.

“Jaskier, no, I – ” he stutters out. “I’m so sorry.” The sorrow in Jaskier’s gaze hasn’t changed, so Geralt begs, “Please don’t leave.” His voice sounds rough and wrecked, even to his own ears but at least Jaskier doesn’t leave. Encouraged by that fact, Geralt goes on, “I can’t ask you to forgive me, after everything, but – ” Tentatively, he reaches out and takes Jaskier’s hand in his. “Could you consider... coming back? We can figure this out however slow you want, just... Don’t leave. Please.”

Jaskier sighs, his eyelids fluttering shut, but he doesn’t shy away from Geralt’s touch. Geralt’s heart starts beating wildly in victory and then, as seconds pass and Jaskier still stands there, breathing, it turns to hope.

Yet, when Jaskier opens his eyes, he frees his hand from Geralt’s grasp. “I need some time to think,” he replies apologetically, “This... this is not it. This is not right.”

“What?” Geralt whispers.

“I’m not saying no,” Jaskier reassures. “I just... fuck, Geralt, I can barely resist you right now. I want my answer to count.”

Geralt opens his mouth to say something, anything, but he can’t muster a word. His throat is constricted in a silent, helpless scream. Jaskier smiles sadly.

“Thank you for the review, Geralt,” he says, “And don’t worry, I will see you around.”

Then, to Geralt’s anguish, Jaskier takes his hand and brings it to his lips, laying a kiss on Geralt’s knuckles. The feeling of his mate’s mouth on his skin sends a thrill down his spine and he gasps. Jaskier lets go and walks away. Geralt can’t will himself to move.

Jaskier leaves.

Geralt stays in the storeroom. Were he able to howl, he would do so, hoping that his Songbird would answer the call. Yet, Jaskier left once again. The memory of his touch is all Geralt can think about as he stands there, all alone, until he can take it no more.

When he finally springs into action, he knows he won't be stopped.

Read the rest on AO3

#myfic #geraskier #geralt x jaskier #soulmate au

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