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#its almost as if you get different experiences at different places lol

bunnypeew · 18 hours

Note

Do you write nsfw alphabets?? if yes then valentino alphabet valentino alphabet valentino alphabet valentino alphabet val 🌀🌀🌀🌀🌀👄👁️ (i'm mentally ill)

Valentino NSFW alphabet

self explantory MDI THANK YOU

YAHHH I CAN DO THAT NEVER DONE IT BEFORE SO BARE WITH ME AHAHA, I picture him as a switch btw :3c

A = Aftercare (what they’re like after sex)

He would defintly prepare a bubble bath for you after it since he's pretty rough with it and wants to make sure you are in perfect shape for him

B = Body part (their favorite body part of theirs and also their partner’s)

his favorite body parts of his are obviously his wings! cuz even tho they are very big they are still pretty sensitive, while on you it would be the breats/chest part, he loves to touch there since its almost always the most sensitive part of someones body

C = Cum (anything to do with cum, basically)

he's not scared of cumming inside, also loving it doesn't help that you are most probably getting cream pied every single time :)

D = Dirty secret (pretty self explanatory, a dirty secret of theirs)

he doesnt really have a dirty secret, everyone knows he's into anything so

E = Experience (how experienced are they? do they know what they’re doing?)

hes the Overlord of p0rn for fuck sake, he knows what he's doing for sure, since he had a lot time to practice too

F = Favorite position (this goes without saying)

mating press. MATING PRESS. even tho he knows he cant get you pregnant he wants you to take every single drop of his cum

G = Goofy (are they more serious in the moment? are they humorous? etc.)

Hes not a really humorous person in general but he does like to make you laugh sometimes during the deed, just to make sure you are enjoying yourself too

H = Hair (how well groomed are they? does the carpet match the drapes? etc.)

I like to believe he completly clean shaven, he's doesn't like hair and messy so he cuts it completely

I = Intimacy (how are they during the moment? the romantic aspect)

again he doesnt seem like the romantic type, but with you its a completely different thing, he loves you a lot even tho he's doesn't like to show it, sometimes he just cant help but be kind of lovey dovey during sex

J = Jack off (masturbation headcanon)

he likes to do it a lot, especially when you arent around, he used to have a lot of fwb before he met you, but now he restrains from fucking anyone else lol

K = Kink (one or more of their kinks)

OH LORD DOES HE HAVE KINKS,,, he has way to many to list I'm gonna be honest, he likes and accepts everything

L = Location (favorite places to do the do)

everywhere. LITERALLY everywhere. he doesnt care if he gets caught, if he wants you he wants you, end of discussion

M = Motivation (what turns them on, gets them going)

usually hes a really horny person in general but what gets him going is when you wear something revealing, or seeing you naked

N = No (something they wouldn’t do, turn offs)

I'm really not sure about this one chief 🤔

O = Oral (preference in giving or receiving, skill, etc.)

he prefers giving, he wants to make sure that you are the one enjoying it

P = Pace (are they fast and rough? slow and sensual? etc.)

fast and rough 100% self explanatory

Q = Quickie (their opinions on quickies, how often, etc.)

He loves quickies, especially if he needs to go to work after cuz then it means he will be in a good mood

R = Risk (are they game to experiment? do they take risks? etc.)

like I said in the Location part he doesn't care, he will take the risk if it means you'll both feel good

S = Stamina (how many rounds can they go for? how long do they last?)

he will go for a ton of rounds, that is until you are worned out, for him you could go on for forever

T = Toys (do they own toys? do they use them? on a partner or themselves?)

he likes to use vibrators, to make you feel even better during sex,, usually its an internal one :3

U = Unfair (how much they like to tease)

He teases A LOT,, he likes to be a dickhead about it

V = Volume (how loud they are, what sounds they make, etc.)

He's really loud, grunts. moans and whimpers will be heard from him all the time you are doing it

W = Wild card (a random headcanon for the character)

As I said in the title I imagine him as a switch so he fw everything, especially pegging ;)

X = X-ray (let’s see what’s going on under those clothes)

hes pretty big, but it doesnt show cuz he usually tucks, but lets say 8 inches soft and 9.5 inches when hars :3

Y = Yearning (how high is their sex drive?)

hes libido is really high. hes horny at all times of the day so ahahah

Z = Zzz (how quickly they fall asleep afterwards)

hes an old man. He will fall asleep right after idc

OKAY OKAY THIS IS THE FIRST TIME IVE EVER DONE THIS SO IM SO SORRY IF ITS OOC OR NOT AS GOOD BUT I HOPE YOU ENJOYED!!!

#valentino #hazbin hotel valentino #valentino hazbin hotel #the vees #valentino x reader #valentino x you #hazbinhotel #hazbin hotel x reader #hazbin hotel

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islandofsages · 4 months

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hello!! I was hoping I could request gn!reader (aka Yuu) who loves dancing (and is actually really good at it, preferably something like contemporary dancing?) but hasn't told anyone in nrc. basically, the boys' reaction to stumbling upon them dancing one day!!

(requesting for cater, lilia, riddle, jamil, malleus, rook and vil!!)

thank youuuu <3

characters: riddle, cater, jamil, vil, rook, malleus and lilia x gn!yuu

tags: relationship not specified, fluff, imagines format; grim mention in riddle's, cater's, malleus' and lilia's. vil mention in cater's. kalim mention in jamil's. vil's is set in book 5

warnings: use of the word "dear" as a term of endearment in lilia's part

author's notes: i tried making them stumble yuu in different places so if they seem random thats why lol also i almost forgot about the "hasn't told anyone at nrc" part i get so carried away sometimes help 😭

Riddle Rosehearts

He has a deep appreciation for dancing and consequently, he respects anyone who is a connoisseur of the art

He would tell you everything he knows about the art and comes to you to inform you on any new things he learns about it

You would tell him that you’re a dancer yourself, especially contemporary dance; the freeing nature of your favorite form has proven to be an effective way to relieve stress and express yourself

…But you’re a bit too shy to admit that to someone as amazing as Riddle - so fate takes the matter into its own hands

You were dancing in Ramshackle’s lounge, all by yourself since Grim is napping, a luxury you don’t get to afford too often

You simply felt like it; you put on some music and suddenly your body grows a mind of its own

You were so absorbed in your performance that you didn’t manage to hear knocks rapping on your door, let alone the sound of footsteps leading up to it

Sensing no answer from you and immediately growing worried, whoever was at the door bursted in to search for you… only to be met with a you in the middle of a dance move

It takes you a few seconds to notice him standing there in awe of your movements. When you do, you instantly ran over to the source of your music and switched it off in embarrassment

He asked you why you did that and would love for you to continue dancing but you only shook your head and tell him you weren’t fully ready to show off your moves yet and that you were simply going with the flow

“I mean, that’s kinda the whole point of contemporary dancing, just going with the flow? But still, I need to choreograph some parts of it to actually look like a form of dance.”

He chuckles at your response and doesn’t push you to resume if you feel uncomfortable. You thank him for respecting your boundaries

Though everything between you goes smoothly after the incident, you’ll never forget the look on his face when he laid his eyes on: the pure wonder in his eyes told everything you needed to know.

Cater Diamond

He thinks dancing is super cool and he sometimes try to demonstrate that - and in your opinion, he’s not half-bad at it despite what Vil would say

You would show off your own moves but you don’t wanna kill his vibes, even if he’d think you’re super good at it

But one day you’ll tell him how much you love contemporary dance and the fact that it can convey every human emotion and experience; and then that day comes, though very unexpectedly you would say

It was late in the evening; the school hallways are mostly empty, save for you and Grim casually having a conversation while walking your way back to your dorm

But one glance outside gives you all the inspiration you need for an impromptu dance session - the sky is bleeding orange, blazing yellow bandaging it

Your movements shift. You are now a tribute to the sunset. Grim stands aside and watches you with a sigh but he holds back his witty comments for after you’re done with your performance

Little did you know you have another person in your audience - Cater also had late evening classes and only now he’s heading back to Heartslabyul

At least, that was his initial plan. Seeing you dancing in the hallway caught him off guard, firstly because who in their right mind would dance in the hallways but secondly (and mainly), the way you move enchanted him

Could it even be called moving? Your limbs bend and flex so smoothly that he thought they turned into water somehow

By the time you’re done, you’re given a standing ovation by both of your spectators - one of whose you jump at in shock

“Yuu, that was like, crazy good! Are you secretly some pro dancer or something?”

You blush a little at the fact that he saw you and at the compliment; after that event, it’s impossible to hide anything from him so you simply tell him everything you know

You’d give him pointers and you’re happy to see his improvement from day to day but most importantly, his shining, genuine smile is something you wouldn’t miss for the world.

Jamil Viper

You know he’s very passionate about dance and you truly admire his skill for it

Although he’d be the perfect dance partner, you feel a little self-conscious sharing your own passion for dancing with him

He seems to sparkle when he shows off his skills and you think you lack that type of shine to your own - he begs to differ though, you’ve come to learn

The two of you were hanging out in his room, music pouring out from his stereo and you drowning in it, your limbs spread out on the floor

Then your room is shaken by some unknown noise, though you can assume it’s Kalim-induced, to which Jamil sighed and excused himself to go check out and possibly fix up

You lay there on your own then, nodding your head to the music, until a song you liked dominates the speakers, taking you by surprise

You don’t know what happened but as soon as the first note hit, you’re on your feet and your body was swaying side to side

Losing your mind and body to the music felt good, but then Jamil entered the room when you were mid-dance. You would’ve stopped if it weren’t for him joining in, but not without a taunt

“What, too scared to dance with me? Come and show me what you’ve got, Yuu.”

You accepted his challenge and continued where you left off - the two of you twisted and turned and ended up on the floor lying on your backs once again, gasping for breath

The two of you laughed breathlessly. He then praised you and your dancing abilities and wondered why you never showed him how skilled you are

You shrugged, thinking it wasn’t a big deal, but then he put a hand on your shoulder and offered to have more dance-offs. You didn’t hesitate to agree

When dancing with him, it feels like the most natural thing in the world, as if you were born to do this. And maybe, just maybe, you were born to meet such a wonderful person too.

Vil Schoenheit

You were a bit let down when you couldn’t actually participate as a dancer for the VDC but at the very least it allowed you to give yourself a bit more time to truly showcase your dancing to others

And hosting a training camp for the actual competitors isn’t too bad if it’s for your dorm and for something you’re passionate about

Ramshackle Dorm is lively, what with everyone there. Conflict was inevitable in this school but it did drive you crazy somewhat

One particular day, everyone was taking a break from Vil’s scrutinous training and you can feel the tension in the air

At some point, everyone left the ballroom. Only you remained seated on the floor, your back to the wall. You stared up at the ceiling and sighed. You couldn’t take this anymore

You got to your feet and simply started dancing, as quietly as you could. No music, nothing - you didn’t want to risk garnering attention by being noisy

It definitely served to alleviate some of your stress. You even smiled to yourself and at some points, fought the urge to laugh out of joy

The ballroom seemed different then. The images of your friends came into your mind - all their smiles, their frowns, the determined looks on their faces. You felt your movements growing more fluid at the thought of them

Once you’re done and panting, bent over your knees gasping for air, a loud clap reverberates in the room. Then another. Then a third. Then a figure emerges, their hands clasped

“What a pleasant surprise. You’re not bad at all. Though it’s a bit too late to recruit you, I surely hope you continue to hone that skill of yours.”

Did… did Vil Schoenheit just praise your dancing skills?

Let’s just say you took his advice to heart - it’s hard not to when it’s Vil Schoenheit himself

You also helped the others with some of your advice after the confidence boost and you’re happy to see their improvement. Seeing Vil satisfied also brought a smile to your face.

Rook Hunt

After the VDC, you found yourself more exhausted than usual by the events that occurred and you begged for a break from whatever deity is there in Twisted Wonderland. Dancing was the last thing on your mind

And for a while, that’s what you got - you were able to simply attend classes and watch your friends bicker with each other like a normal student. It was a well-needed break for everyone

Sometimes you’d chat for a bit with any familiar faces you run into and these days, you found yourself chilling by yourself in the courtyard

One day, you suddenly felt a longing to dance once more. And luckily for you, you had the courtyard all to yourself

It went from being some regular courtyard to your stage and the sun was your spotlight; you shone and you twinkled. You were like a star

And that was what you were told by the end of your performance, accompanied by applause from a singular person

“Très bien, Yuu… your performance has moved me to tears!”

Rook exclaims as he makes his way over to you; that certainly wasn’t your intention. You didn’t even think it was worth watching

But then Rook continues to comment on certain aspects of your performance, elaborating in very vivid detail. You’ve never felt so seen before

He would shower you with compliments, as if to say that you shouldn’t have a single doubt in your mind

And you hardly ever do after that since he very much threatened you to be kind to yourself or else

He would tell everyone about your wonderful skill (with your consent, of course), as if you’re his child who he’s been watching grow up over the years

He may be a bit loud about you at times but when you look over at him and see how proud he is of you, you only sigh fondly and hold back a chuckle.

Malleus Draconia

He doesn’t know a lot about the subject but he appreciates it as a form of art and expression of the people

And so you would tell him all about it while being careful to not let on that you’re one yourself which is surprisingly easier than you thought, considering how oblivious he is sometimes

He merely sees you as some sort of dance scholar and as if he doesn’t respect you a lot already, he definitely holds you in higher regard now

And somehow, that elevates to an even higher level when he suddenly finds you out

He was on his routinely walk around Ramshackle; it was a windy night, weather as pleasant as his conversations with you

Coincidentally, whilst his thoughts were on you, he spotted you in the backyard of your dorm with the ghosts and… hm? It’s brightly lit for once

Curious and wanting confirmation, he changed his route to suspiciously festive-looking Ramshackle instead

Meanwhile, you and Grim were dancing to some music the ghosts were playing for you. You all were having a simple party to forget your worries

The ghosts would comment on how you should stop outshining Grim so much, just to mess with Grim. But they had a point; you had a certain glimmer to you when you dance

Malleus saw that much when he reached your party. He stood within the frame of the backdoor, watching your every movement, entranced

After a few minutes did you notice him there, unmoving. Your steps trace their way to him instead. You extend a hand to him

“May I have this dance?”

And you may - the two of you danced, him slipping in flatteries in between moves. Maybe it was just you, but the party seemed to feel much more lively with him. No, not just the party; the whole world was.

Lilia Vanrouge

He knows a thing or two about dancing from all his adventures and he’d love to show you proof of it

So he does - he's definitely got the moves and you definitely want to show him some of your own… someday

You feel a little self-conscious about your own skills after his show but that doesn't stop you from working on your dancing. You're determined to make your skills worthy of Lilia’s attention!

Little did you know. It's futile to really hide anything from this sneaky bastard (affectionate)

You were on your way to class from Ramshackle with Grim and unfortunately for you, you had a little earworm stuck in your head that day

It started off as a skip, then two skips. By five skips, it turned into a full on dance. You felt alive, like you were a main character in a musical

Grim was making fun of you at first but then he started linking his arm with lampposts and swinging himself alongside you

Lilia was watching this all happen from afar, as one does. A student dancing their way to class is no everyday spectacle after all. And it's you too! All the more reason to play peeping tom

Just when you're about to reach the main building did he finally give you the jumpscare of a lifetime

“Why, you didn’t tell me what a wonderful dancer you are, my dear Yuu! I must admit, I feel quite offended.”

He was jesting of course - he was merely glad that he got to witness such a sight. And you’re glad that you’re not as unskilled as you thought you were

He tries his best not to boast your skills to others but you know he can never keep such hidden talent, well, hidden from his beloved Diasomnia family

You got the Diasomnia stamp of approval - not only that, but you’ve definitely impressed someone you hold dear.

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galedekarios · 2 months

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this is a personal vent post so please let me just get it all out without trying to come at me lol:

so many ppl saying they respect larian's decision to peace out and not deal with hasbro/wotc, but i have to be honest, i don't respect them at all.

they are leaving a game behind that is unfinished and a narrative mess.

they leave a game behind where everyone paid the same amount of money for it, yet depending on which character you prefer, you get less content.

the disparity between everyone else and their writer's pet ast*rion is insane. he has a half to a third more content depending on which character you compare him to.

they leave behind a sparse act 2, which is already so barren compared to act 1 and all it had to offer. act 3 is a narrative mess and lacks structure.

they leave a game behind where they made promises a handful of weeks before release where they ought to have known that they, in fact, will not be delivering said promises: access to the upper city, consequences for playing certain races across the acts (playing a drow is going to be different in act 1 and gives you advantages vs act 3 where it would give you understandable disadvantages), etc etc etc.

they leave behind a game where content was cut from the companions to make it seem like the origins have something to offer when that system is barely able to compare what origin playthroughs offered in dos2 and it hurts the game and the experience (like tara being cut for companion gale).

they leave behind a game where they promised to much variety and proclaimed in panels from hell how they struggled to show the width and depth of the game, but really? it's about as deep as a puddle. a lot of the choices do not matter. kill ethel? nah, she's alive and well in the city. no sister hags to be angry here. give karlach no infernal iron and never talk to her at all? doesn't matter, she'll survive until the end of act 3 and will still call you her bff. dissuade gale to use the orb? we'll make sure he'll still offer 3 more times just in case. send yenna away from camp bc you don't want her there? doesn't matter, she'll stay. and yes, i'm aware these are all small things, but they are part of a larger problem. almost nothing you do truly matters to the point of where i just skip most things in act 1 and 2 now.

they leave behind a game that they promise to still patch, but some things have been broken since early access / release to the point of where i'm like i'm sorry, but your word that you will continue to patch things means about as much to me as all the other empty promises. the dialogue about morena dekarios is still broken and it's been over half a year now. the astral sea scene has low-res body textures for months. i know from mutuals who love minthara that her romance is still broken. and i could go on and on.

and what gets me the most about this is all is that they have learned nothing at all from dos2: act 3 of that game was so bugged and all over the place that i couldn't muster up the motivation to finish it the first time i played. they neglected a character to the point of where he could have been removed from the game or made a general hireling (beast).

those issues were at least attempted to be fixed in the definitive edition.

with swen saying that there will be no new content anymore and stating that both bg3 and its characters are now property of wotc/hasbro, it seems unlikely we'll even get an attempt of a fix.

so what this boils down to to me is just another game company not delivering on their promises after overselling their product and more or less abandoning it after a year to move onto the next big thing.

i don't think i can respect that ngl.

#vg: baldur's gate 3 #series: baldur's gate #text: personal #larian critical #bg3 critical

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milliesdiary · 2 years

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𝐑𝐈𝐃𝐈𝐍𝐆 𝐓𝐇𝐄𝐌 — 𝐇𝐎𝐓𝐃 𝐑𝐄𝐀𝐂𝐓𝐈𝐎𝐍𝐒

𝐜𝐡𝐚𝐫𝐚𝐜𝐭𝐞𝐫𝐬; daemon, jace, aemond, aegon

𝐢𝐧𝐜𝐥𝐮𝐝𝐞𝐬; fem!bodied reader, SMUT!!! i cannot stress this enough!

𝐧𝐨𝐭𝐞; just some ideas LOL this was purely self indulgent :) i hope you guys enjoy!

𝐃𝐀𝐄𝐌𝐎𝐍

daemon loves it when you ride him; it’s one of his favorite things. his large hands always cup the tender flesh of your waist, sliding up only to pinch your delicate nipples as you bounce on him. he smirks as your mouth springs open to allow obscene moans to escape into his chambers, his cock vanishing inside your gleaming folds.

“daemon,” you groan, tossing your head back. when daemon lowers his hands down your thighs and clutches your ass roughly, you whimper in agony. scrambling for anything to hold onto, you find stability by placing your hands on his chest as you methodically grind your hips on his lengthy cock.

daemon forces his hips up to meet your balmy walls, causing that hot coil in the center of your stomach to loosen and threaten to snap. "this cunt is all mine," daemon mutters, his smirk falling as he rapidly slams his throbbing cock into you at a break-speed pace. your screams and his strangled groan blend together as his thick seed paints your quivering walls.

𝐉𝐀𝐂𝐄

soft groans fall from jace’s mouth whenever you rise and fall upon his cock, your dripping walls clenching around its throbbing length. his lips are hooked to your ear, emitting obscene groans with every movement and saying dirty words. jace isn’t one for dirty talk — he’s a respectful gentleman — but whenever you ride him? it’s something different. the man gets primal.

"shit — a little faster — yeah, just like that," jace says in a voice that is almost a whisper as he leans back and clutches your hips. his brown hair sticks to his sweaty forehead, those pretty eyes of his focused on you. “you’re perfect,” he adds with a strangled moan as he rolls his hips up to meet yours.

jace allows you to ride him at your own speed; he enjoys watching you take charge and fuck your cunt onto him passionately. when you reach your breaking point, you draw his hair back and bring him close for a messy kiss that results in a tangle of teeth and saliva, your hips accelerating until you both cum with each other’s names on your lips.

𝐀𝐄𝐌𝐎𝐍𝐃

riding aemond is absolutely amazing. it feels amazing, it’s sexy, it’s fast, and it’s hot. the puddle at the bottom of his shaft gets more shiny and sticky with each time you come up from his cock, and he hums in satisfaction when you let out a strangled cry of his name.

aemond is so enthralled by your movements that he doesn't notice your gentle voice as you whimper, "my prince, please—“ which causes your hip movements to slow down and eventually cease. your begging has him smirking devilishly, and he doesn’t give you a chance to say another word before he jerks his cock in and out of your folds for you, caressing that tender place.

aemond watches you closely the entire time: your thighs shaking from exhaustion, your stuttering moans, and the jerk of your pelvis as you strive to keep him inside entirely. he is captured. you are the focus of his one blue eye. "good girl,” he half-growls, lips drawn into a taught line as his hair falls into your face with every thrust. once you get close to your climax, aemond takes complete control, slamming his cock up into you and rubbing your clit with a thumb. ride him like the dragon he is and he’ll give you the experience of a lifetime!!

𝐀𝐄𝐆𝐎𝐍

much like the man himself, riding aegon is rough and intense. you tug on the waves of his platinum hair with every slide of his thick cock inside you, causing a groan to slip from between his gritted teeth. he loves it when you slam your hips into his as your tongues collide, causing a cacophony of moans to fill the room. he bites your bottom lip as his lithe fingers dig into the flesh of your ass brutally.

"you’re such a fucking whore," aegon growls breathlessly. “you might as well belong in a pleasure house.”

aegon watches closely as his cock disappears into your pussy, getting impossibly harder whenever you repeatedly scream his name. each harsh stroke inside of your cunt feels so fucking good. aegon can’t get enough of you humping him like a feral animal, and when he can no longer control himself, he grabs your hips and violently slams you down onto him.“fuck — just like this.” call him your king and aegon is instantly cumming.

#daemon targeryen x reader #daemon x reader #aemond targaryen x reader #aemond x reader #jace velaryon x reader #jace targaryen x reader #jace x reader #aegon targaryen x reader #aegon ii x reader #aegon x reader #hotd smut #jacerys velaryon #millie’s works — 📓

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fannyspammy · 1 year

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Butterflies

Adam Warlock x Reader

Summary: Adam has never felt the way he feels when he’s with you.

Warnings: none ! just a lotta fluff on fluff on fluff hehe hence the cheesy title. There aren’t really spoilers i think unless you count the location maybe? Idk it’s pretty general imo

A/N: watched gotg 3 twice over the weekend & im obsesseddd with this man lol. Might make this a series of firsts with Adam if yall would read it 👀 lmk if you’d like to be tagged in future chapters!

[not my gif]

He was built like a man — perfect in every way with his chiseled body & god-like strength — but he had the innocence of a child. And y/n loved that about him. He was the purest person she knew, embracing every new experience & every new discovery with such wonder. And she loved that she got to share so many firsts with him.

Y/n always smiled to herself when she remembered the first time he told her he had feelings for her. Or tried to, at least.

They were sitting in silence on a roof in Knowhere, people-watching. They’d come there every afternoon since meeting after the defeat of the High Evolutionary. Having lived in Knowhere with the Guardians before the attack (his attack, ironically), y/n knew all the spots for when you needed a moment alone, & when they’d met, she could tell he was someone who needed that space to just be.

So she introduced him to her spot, & they’d been coming ever since. But Nebula had needed their help with a few tasks that afternoon, so their daily retreat was pushed later into the evening. By this time, the community was out in the streets, dancing & playing & having fun. Music & laughter filled the air, & the faint scent of liquor presented itself as everyone began to drink the night away. It was getting late & y/n was getting tired, so she scooted closed & rested her head on his shoulder.

Y/n felt him tense at the initial contact, before quickly relaxing and melting into it, laying his head on hers. After a couple minutes he spoke.

“Y/n, I… feel something.. when I’m with you.”

She looked up at him without moving from her position, raising an eyebrow in confusion. “Hm?”

“Something.. warm. Tingly? I-I don’t really- how do I- it’s hard to explain…”

Y/n giggled at his flustered attempt to explain himself.

Adam sighed & tried again. “I.. care about you. A lot. But it’s different from the way I cared about my mother. Or Blurp. Like, I want to be with Blurp all the time & hug him & cuddle him, and I want to do the same with you, but in a different way. But I can’t explainhowit’sdifferentitjustknowthatits-”

“Adam!” y/n said with a laugh, stopping his rambling. She lifted her head from its resting place to look at him, amused. “Slow down!”

“See! When you smile at me like that I feel it!”

Y/n bit her lip to restrain the smile spreading across her face, her brows furrowed in thought.

“Can I try something?” She asked. Adam nodded.

“Do you feel it when I do this?” Y/n gently brushed a lock of hair away from his face. He nodded again, slower.

“What about.. this?” Y/n brought her hand down to his shoulder & dragged it down slowly to rest on his chest. She felt his heartbeat quicken.

“I feel it more now.”

Using her other hand, she grabbed his arm to raise it between them, and then placed her hand on his, gently interlacing their fingers. “This?”

His heartbeat quickened again and he nodded. A curious smile spread over his lips.

“I feel it right in my stomach.. almost like it’s.. like it’s fluttering. Like-”

“Butterflies.” Y/n said, finishing his sentence.

Adam nodded again, excitedly, like she’d just solved a puzzle he’d been stuck on for days. “Like butterflies!”

Y/n leaned in closer, resting their intertwined hands in his lap. “Adam, you like me,” she said with a teasing smile on her lips.

“Well yeah, you know I like you. I like most people. Except the ones I need to fight, which used to be you & our friends but now I like you guys.”

She chuckled and pressed her head against the nook of his neck, back resting on his chest, pulling his arm around her, fingers still locked together.

“No, Adam. I mean you like like me. Like, romantically.” She tapped his torso with her free hand. “That’s why you feel all warm and gooey inside when you’re with me, or when I touch you. You having feelings for me. Romantic feelings.”

“Romantic…,” he whispered to himself, then paused shortly. “Do you like me too? In the romantic way?”

Y/n felt his chest tense as his breathing hitched, anticipating her answer. He may not understand his feelings yet, but he knew he wanted her to feel the same way. She squeezed his hand softly in reassurance.

“Mhmm. I like you a lot.”

He eased beneath her & then was quiet for a moment, as if deep in thought, processing the new feeling he had just discovered.

Then he held her tighter, and she felt him smile as she melted into his embrace.

“I like liking you. It feels nice.”

#adam warlock #adam warlock x reader #adam x reader #will poulter #will poulter x reader #adam warlock imagine #will poulter imagine #gotg #guardians of the galaxy #guardians of the galaxy vol 3 #gotg 3 #gotg imagine #gotg vol 3 #gotg v3

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Text

Tangled in his Webs

Art generated by: Niji • Journey Request from: @migueloharacumslut Ask: And I have a request I forgot rather I submitted or not. Mad scientist Miguel x therapist reader Miguel gets put in a psych ward because he got caught experimenting on people and himself trying to turned them in to spider people. He’s been in the psych ward for five years and he needs to be cleared to go back in the world. That’s where the reader comes in to clear him only he manipulates her into thinking he is sane. During their session Miguel becomes obsessed with the reader and little does he know she is obsessed with him too. At night she touched herself to the thought of him. When Miguel get out he finds her. Make the sex nastyyy, hard and rough little choking wouldn’t hurt either. Please and thank you ! 😊 A/N: I really loved this idea and enjoyed writing Scientist Miguel so much. Might write him more lol, but thank you @migueloharacumslut for the idea. Also this is the first part and a second one will be following this one, hope you enjoy!

💉staring: Scientist!Miguel O’Hara x Fem!Therapist Reader

🩵preview: “I imagine I must seem like a puzzle that’s meant to be solved by you, don’t I, dear?” He asked, his gaze never letting up and keeping its intensity. Due to his closeness, you almost missed his inquiry, but upon detecting it, it surprised you. Hastily, you shook your head, dismissing his ideology and rejecting his notion. “N-No, I wouldn’t exactly describe you in that way, Dr. O’Hara.” You swiftly replied.

“You wouldn’t?” He asked, his voice low and slow. “So, how would you describe me, Doctor?”

🔬summary: As an evaluation therapist at Nueva York’s Sanctuary for Mental Healing, you are assigned a new patient—one who is complex, captivating, and dangerously drawing you in more than you ever expected.

⚗️tw/cw (Just for this part): Big Dick Miguel, Bondage, Fingering, Masturbation, Psychopathy, Restraints, Sadism, Size Difference, Restraints

🔭Pet names: Cariño (Darling), Querida (Dear)

🩵Rating: 18+ explicit I SMUT I

🥼Word Count: 7.7k

**This fanfiction is a work of fiction, and any resemblance to real-life individuals or events is purely coincidental. It does not intend to diagnose or represent any real mental health conditions. Thank you for understanding, and I hope you enjoy the story.**

Your eyes fluttered open, consciousness slowly returning. You felt a dull ache and soreness in your throat, accompanied by a pervasive feeling of weakness throughout your body. Blinking against the harsh fluorescent lights overhead and adjusting to the suffocating sterile scent of antiseptic, you noticed that you were lying on your back against a hard, cold surface.

With furrowed eyebrows, you attempted to sit up, only to be thwarted back by the metal restraints tightly bound around your wrists and ankles.

‘What the heck!?’

You thought, panic and fear beginning to grip you. Your eyes darted down to discover yourself clad only in your undergarments—a delicate white, laced satin set—leaving you exposed to the chilling breeze that consistently swept through the well-lit space.

You couldn't remember how you got here; your groggy mind unable to piece together the events that led to your presence upon the metal table. The faint hum of machinery echoed from far away, punctuated by distant murmurs that made your heart drop.

With dazed eyes, you looked around your surroundings to be met with the overbearing shade of a bright white that covered the walls of what looked to be a lab of some sorts. Countertops were lined with an array of perfectly arranged scientific instruments, machines, and beakers.

Shelves held neatly labeled containers, each housing an assortment of chemicals and biological specimens. Despite being well-lit, there were little to no windows present, intensifying the feeling of isolation within the controlled environment.

The place seemed devoid of humanity, replaced by a location where experimentation and analysis were handled freely without compassion or warmth.

But one thing about the lab really stood out to you: two jars sitting upon the shelves—one full of bloody red eyes and the other with abnormally sharp canines.

The sight almost made you vomit, hastily turning to look away. Your heart and breath were picking up, fear clawing at your being. Although how morbid the otherworldly body parts were, they triggered something in your head.

The more you thought upon it, awareness seeped in like an unwelcome guest; slowly, you began to remember.

The mental facility...

Red eyes...

The flowers...

Sharp canines...

Black glasses...

His release...

Him.

The wine...

Then darkness...

The memories came rushing back so quickly that you weren’t able to keep up, until it all came back to...

Him...

A wave of regret and stupidity overwhelmed you. Never in your life had you felt so worthless.

You should have known...

You should have fucking known...

‘He wasn’t well. He wasn’t fine. You were wrong, so wrong-’

“Good… You are awake.”

The bone-chilling voice of your captor filled the room, sending a familiar chill down your back. With trembling lips, you turned your head to see the backside of a massive male entering the room. His coffee-brown locks styled neatly upon his head, a white lab coat adorning his huge build along with black dress pants and oxfords.

The scientist wore clean attire, perfect for working in the lab, but his outfit was beyond your concern.

You knew who he was, but you didn’t want to believe it.

You gulped, watching him slap on a pair of white latex gloves upon his large, calloused palms before beginning to inspect the scientific tools that sat upon the nearby counter.

"And here I thought you would have been excited to see me again..." he said in a husky voice, responding to your silence—his Latino accent unmistakable, along with a hint of amusement found in his tone. You felt like an idiot for falling for him, for becoming so fascinated with a madman like him...

But you were still in denial.

You weren’t going to believe it was him until you saw his face...

“T-T-Turn around…” You said hoarsely, the pain in your throat distant underneath the layers of fear and anxiety coursing through your body. At your demand, the large scientist laughed. “Turn around?” He asked slowly, silence following his inquiry, making your body run cold.

Suddenly, he spun around, slamming his palms onto the metal table you laid upon. The abruptness and loud noise made you jump, and a gasp erupted from your lips. His eyes stared directly into yours, holding the same madness that you believed he had cured when you initially met him. But, like before, it wasn’t the insanity in his gaze that made your heart drop to the pit of your stomach...

It was his eyes...

His teeth...

The scientist’s crimson eyes looked down at you, taking in your discolored skin and half-lidded eyes that were still under a drowsy spell. “I turned around now, are you happy?” He asked with a playful smirk. “Do you recognize me now, dear?”

“Do I need to give you any more proof that it is I?”

Your eyes widened, the look upon your face enough to show the mad scientist that you did, in fact, remember who he was— but you were too speechless to respond, causing the male to chuckle.

His snickering seemed to reverberate off the walls of your mind as the fluorescent lights of his lab bounced off his razor sharp canines.

With trembling lips and dilated pupils, you looked over his face, your heart breaking more and more because…

It was, indeed, him...

The mad scientist...

The sexy patient...

Dr. Miguel O’Hara…

The man you fell for…

White, close-toed wedges clicked upon the mental facility's aged linoleum tiles, the floor's once-bright patterns now a faded, discolored mosaic covered with scuff marks and indistinct stains that revealed the struggles of all who shuffled through the dimly lit corridor. The mental facility, unintentionally, gave off an eerie atmosphere with walls clad in faded, peeling paint and ceilings with bright, flickering fluorescent lights that cast irregular shadows along the cold institutional floor, further giving anyone who traversed the halls the creeps.

You, a therapist meant to evaluate patients for release, were given a new challenge—a patient that held a sadistic background coupled with a remarkable intellect that made many wonders how he found himself inside 'Nueva York’s Sanctuary for Mental Healing.'

Dr. Miguel O’Hara was your new patient's name, an intelligent scientist who became a little twisted after his discovery of gene splicing. In his pursuit of advancing the human race, he became obsessed with the idea and creation of spider-human hybrids. After many experimentations of creating what is referred to as mutates, he was unsuccessful. Before he could continue with his study, he was arrested and sentenced to seven years here at the institution where it seems he’d made progress.

Whilst you walked towards his cell, taking the seemingly endless halls of the asylum, you looked over his file. Inside were documents containing his personal information, such as full name, date of birth, emergency contact, and next of kin. In the brown folder were also his medical history, psychiatric assessment, diagnostic evaluations, and much more information collected during his time at the institution; however, there were four pieces of his folder that piqued your interest:

Observation logs, Treatment plan, Risk assessment, and lastly, incident reports.

You studied each of the documents to discover the important details that needed to be surveyed before seeing the scientist in person.

_____________________________________

Miguel O’Hara - Mental Health File

Patient Information:

Full name: Miguel O’Hara

Date of Birth: 10/13/2070

Appointed into: Nueva York’s Sanctuary for Mental Healing

Admission Date: 11/10/2099

Emergency Contact: N/A

Next Of Kin: N/A

**The patient has explicitly communicated a desire for their next of kin not to be associated with their mental health treatment, and no detailed information about family members was recorded to respect the patient’s privacy.**

Diagnosis:

Primary Diagnosis: Psychopathy

Secondary Diagnosis: Antisocial Personality Disorder

Treatment Team:

Primary Therapist: Dr. Jessica Owens, Licensed Clinical Psychologist

Psychiatrist: Dr. Peter B. Parker, MD

Nursing Staff: Nurse Mary Jane Watson, RN

_____________________________________

Treatment Plan:

Medications

Fluoxetine (Prozac)

Dosage: 20 mg daily

Purpose: Miguel O’Hara is prescribed Fluoxetine to address symptoms of irritability that derives from his disorder of Antisocial Personality.

Lorazepam (Ativan)

Dosage: 0.5 mg as needed (PRN) for anxiety

Purpose: Miguel O’Hara is given Lorazepam on an as-needed basis to manage anxiety-related symptoms or impulsivity.

**Its used closely monitored due to the risk of misuse**

Lamotrigine (Lamictal)

Dosage: Gradual titration starting at 25 mg, with adjustments based on response.

Purpose: Miguel O’Hara’s treatment plan included Lamotrigine to help stabilize mood swings or emotional dysregulation.

_____________________________________

Incident reports

Date: 2/3/2100

Incident: Verbal altercation with another patient during group therapy

Action Taken: Immediate de-escalation and one-on-one session with Dr. Peter B. Parker.

Date: 6/21/2100

Incident: Refusal to take prescribed medication

Action Taken: Nursing staff provided additional support and education

Date: 10/3/2100

Incident: Refused to attend scheduled group therapy and became verbally aggressive towards staff members

Action Taken: Security staff was called to ensure the safety of other patients and staff. Miguel was later engaged in a one-on-one session to explore the reasons behind his resistance to group participation.

Date: 1/4/2101

Incident: 2nd occurence of refusal to take prescribed medication

Action Taken: Nursing staff provided additional support and education and therapeutic engagement by Dr. Jessica Owens to address any fears or misconceptions related to his prescribed medications.

Date: 4/18/2101

Incident: Observed by Nurse Mary Jane Watson of the patient hoarding various items in his room, including non-permissible objects.

Action taken: Staff conducted a room check, confiscated unauthorized items, and discussed appropriate belongings with Miguel. A follow-up session with his therapist, Dr. Jessica Owens was scheduled to explore any underlying concern.

Date: 3/21/2102

Incident: Engaged in a physical altercation with another patient during a recreational activity

Action taken: Immediate intervention by staff to separate the individuals involved. Both parties were assessed for injuries, and a report was filed. Increased monitoring and a review of Miguel’s treatment plan were conducted to address potential triggers for aggressive behavior

_____________________________________

Risk Assessments:

Current Risk level: Moderate

Factors: History of aggression, resistance to treatment, potential for manipulative behavior

Interventions: Increased monitoring, ongoing assessment for potential triggers

_____________________________________

Observation Logs:

Date/Time: 8/16/2102, 2:30 PM

Observation: Miguel exhibited signs of increased irritability during the group mindfulness session. Requested to leave the session prematurely.

Staff comments: Noted Miguel’s discomfort during mindfulness exercises. Alternative relaxation techniques were explored for future sessions.

Date/Time: 12/2/2103, 10:00 AM

Observation: Miguel was observed engaging in a one-on-one conversation with staff during morning indoor activities. Discussed personal interests and aspirations.

Staff comments: Encouraged Miguel’s open communication. Noted his ability to articulate personal interest, fostering a sense of connection with staff.

Date/Time: 2/15/2104, 6:45 PM

Observations: Spends most of his time in the facility’s library, engrossed in reading.

Staff Comments: Positive use of leisure time observed. Reading contributed to a sense of routine and engagement.

Date/Time: 6/23/2104, 8:30 PM

Observations: Attended the evening group therapy, contributing to discussions on coping strategies. Demonstrated empathy towards a fellow patient sharing personal challenges.

Staff Comments: Noted Miguel’s willingness to engage in group discussions and support peers. Positive progress in developing empathy and interpersonal skills.

**Miguel O’Hara has exhibited excellent improvement and staff believes he can be released in 2105, instead of 2107.**

_____________________________________

You closed his folder, taking a look at the photo that decorated the front. Like many patients at Nueva York’s Sanctuary for Mental Healing (NYS-MH), Miguel O’Hara didn’t look like a dangerous individual; he was actually quite handsome—with dark, wavy locks that framed his olive, chiseled face and amber eyes shielded by a pair of black eyeglasses; Dr. O’Hara wasn’t a bad-looking guy.

To ponder upon the atrocities, he could have committed for the sake of science was baffling as you gazed at the photo. The more you inspected the image, the happier you became at the fact he was doing better - better enough to be released back into society.

It was why you were here, anyway…

You tucked the folder under your arm and continued your walk towards his room, passing steel doors that lined the corridor, each secured with heavy bolts and reinforced locks to keep the patients contained and prevent them from harming themselves or others. Occasionally, muffled echoes of distant cries and disjointed whispers seeped through the cracks, adding to the unsettling symphony of the troubled minds that dwelled within.

You've walked these halls many times, but there was something about today that really made your skin crawl. So, it was relieving when you finally found Miguel O’Hara’s room, number 209.

Two guards stood on either side of his door, present only for emergencies. With a deep breath and slight adjustments to the white top, black blazer, and bodycon skirt that covered you, you gave each of them a nod and unlocked his door with a key, entering Miguel’s room…

Upon stepping inside, you instantly took notice of the soft, muted tones of blues and greens dominating the color palette, bringing a sense of serenity to the room. The patient's sleeping area contained the normal necessities—a comfortable bed with crisp, clean linens and a modest seating area. The furniture was arranged in an open and uncluttered manner, with personal touches here and there by the patient himself or for safety precautions.

For his adoration for reading and science, a small shelf was placed inside his room, displaying a few books and a potted plant, offering familiarity to the scientist.

Your eyes shifted to the large, muscular male who sat upon his bed, dressed in a white t-shirt, gray sweatpants, and slip-on shoes. His massive backside faced you as it seemed he was engrossed in writing, his huge hand moving gracefully upon the page he was working on.

You cast a glance at the camera positioned in the corner of the ceiling in his room, placed there for monitoring and to ensure the patient, and others remain safe. After making sure the camera blinks red twice, showing its activity, you approach him with light steps.

"Miguel O’Hara?" you called out to him in a soft voice, not wishing to disrupt him. All of his movements came to a halt, his body rigid as his large hand placed the pen he was using into the open journal before slowly closing it. You watched him set the book down beside him on the bed, wondering if the handsome male you saw on the photo would be the same seated before you.

It seemed you were watching with batted breath for him to turn around and when he did, the sight of him shocked you and made your heart skip a beat.

You knew from his photo, the male would be gorgeous—so attractive that if he weren't your patient, you'd probably gush over him from afar. But it wasn't his attractiveness that made your breath hitch.

He looked completely different.

He looked…

Otherworldly.

With a cold expression, you stared back at a pair of crimson eyes covered with black eyeglasses, a small smile spreading across his tanned lips, revealing a set of sharp canines. “You must be the therapist that is to evaluate me. Right, Querida?” He inquired with a hum, his deep voice holding a Latino accent.

You gulped at the intensity of his abnormal scarlet orbs, subconsciously clenching his brown folder in your hands and giving him a nod. “Y-Yes, I am,” you replied, stepping back to give the large male room to stand, and when he did…

He was like a giant…

The bed creaked at his ascent as his massive being towered over you, your head tilting up to maintain eye contact. Choking back how intimidated you were, you gestured over to the small seating area of two white cushioned chairs and a table in the corner of his room. “L-Let’s sit over here to talk,” you proposed, and for a moment, he just stood there, gazing down at you like a mere ant before his tight-lipped smile returned.

With an approving grunt, he stepped in front of you; with his powerful, long legs, it took him little to no time to reach the comfort area and settle down into the white chair, the seat creaking under his heavy weight. You followed behind him, moving to sit across from your new patient and shifting into a comfortable position.

When your eyes met the male's, his crimson eyes were already staring at you, lingering upon your body in a way that made you feel like a microbe under a telescope. You gave him a polite smile, shaking off the unsettling feeling that always rose within you when speaking with the patients. “It’s nice to finally meet you, Dr. Miguel O’Hara. My name is Dr. Y/LN, and as you’ve been informed, I am the therapist here to evaluate you for your release.” You explained sweetly, watching every part of the patient, who remained completely motionless, simply continuing to stare back at you with an expression devoid of all emotion.

“It’s nice to see a new face, doctor. It can get rather boring here,” he uttered, using his middle finger to push his black eyeglasses up the bridge of his broad nose.

You placed his folder down upon the table, turning it to not reveal his photo on the front; you've learned from past experiences that the sight tended to worry them. Bringing your legs to cross over each other, you clasped your hands, placing them on your lap. “Boring?” you asked with furrowed brows. “Why don’t we speak about your time here first, Dr. O’Hara? Is that okay with you?” The inquiry left your lips in a soothing tone, one that calmed most patients upon hearing it; but with this patient, you couldn’t quite tell—he hid his emotions too well.

“Well, maybe not boring…repetitive is a better word,” he corrected himself. “But, dear, I’m fine with speaking of my time here.” He replied with a smile, placing his hands upon the armrests and widening his stance. Your eyes drifted to run along his inviting toned thighs adorned by a pair of gray sweatpants that did little to conceal the curves of the muscles underneath.

You also took notice of his posture; taking a mental note of openness from the patient before you asked your question, “Well then, may I ask how you are doing during morning activities? It's stated that you prefer Creative Arts Therapy in the mornings, correct?”

He nodded, his sharp canines peeking out from between his lips as he spoke. “Indeed, mostly during Creative Arts Therapy, I write,” he explained in a deep voice. “I’ve grown to learn that to better settle my thoughts is to put them on paper.”

“And that is an excellent form of therapy that you’ve discovered for yourself, Dr. O’Hara. May I ask, what exactly do you write?” You asked, trying to ignore the faint sight of madness in his crimson orbs. “I write down my thoughts, ideas, and aspirations,” he simply said.

You hummed, giving him a smile. “How about future plans? Do you write about those?” At your question, he snickered, giving you a wry, dismissive head shake. “I…don’t write much on that,” he replied. “I’ll hate to get my hopes up,” he added in an amused, yet somewhat disheartened tone.

“Get your hopes up?” you inquired, eyebrows creasing in confusion. “May you elaborate, Dr. O’Hara?” The male nodded, his large fingers stroking the armrest of his chair in a deep caress. “I do not wish to anticipate that I will be released early,” his caresses of the chair never ceasing, and his eyes trained on his moving fingers.

You studied him, taking in his deflated voice and how he spoke in a slow manner. Your gaze shifted to take in the intricate motion his fingers moved upon the armrest as there were multiple reasons a patient would do such a thing.

He could be nervous, frustrated, impatient, or simply doing it to comfort himself. Recalling his mannerisms from previously, you could cross out your thought of him being nervous; the way the scientist carried himself was in a way of confidence that couldn’t be faked, so it left you with the last three—frustration, impatience, or comfort.

Without further observation, you couldn’t pinpoint his reasoning for his odd gesture, instead giving him a soft grin and replying to his previous words of anticipation. “I understand your concerns about getting your hopes up, especially considering that you were rewarded with an early release date based on your wonderful behavior as of late,” you sympathized, “So it’s completely normal to feel cautious about expectations,” you said, taking in the abnormally muscular male before you.

“But let’s explore these feelings, shall we? Let’s say you are released in the next two weeks; what would your life look like, Dr. O’Hara?” you asked, deeply intrigued by his answer.

A moment of silence filled the room after your inquiry, the doctor continuing to make intricate patterns upon the armrest with his finger before his red eyes returned back to you. A nervous chuckle rumbled from his chest—the sound restoring life back into the room. “Ahh, I always get stumped on that question. It's another reason I haven’t written much about it in my journal.”

You nodded, placing your hands upon your legs. “Well, let’s start small,” you proposed with a grin. “You seem to have taken a liking to the hobby of writing while staying here at NYS-MH. Would you like to expand on that?” Miguel gave you a thoughtful hum, his pointer finger continuing to glide against the armrest of his chair.

“I’ve…always wanted to write a book.” Your eyes snapped from his fingers to rest upon his chiseled face, surprise and amazement present upon your facial features at his desire. “Oh really? And what would that book be about?”

“Genetics, of course.” He chuckled, the mention of his past interest that caused his descent into madness making your heart skip a beat. Your eyes narrowed, the amazement fading from your being. You leaned back into your chair, keeping your composure.

“Are you still interested in Genetics, Dr. O’Hara?” Your inquiry being met with a nod from the patient, one that he didn’t hesitate on responding with. “I’ve worked in the field for almost my entire life and I’m exceptionally good at it.” He explained with a voice of knowledge in a low, deep whisper. “So why would I abandon my hard-earned skills and education?”

His reasoning on his maintained attachment to the field was an excellent one, but like many things, it could be a trigger; causing the once cured doctor to revert back to his old ways of sadism and horrendous acts for the sake of science. This potential trigger would not only bring harm to everyone once more but erase the hard work that Miguel had achieved at the mental institution to fix.

You cleared your throat before speaking. “I…understand your desire to write a book about Genetics. It’s an intriguing subject.” You said, preparing yourself to ask a question that would surely strike the doctor. “But considering the circumstance of your past experiments and the impact they had, how do you plan to approach the topic responsibly?” You asked, watching his reaction closely in anticipation.

After your question it seemed as if everything stopped—froze even…

You gazed at Miguel taking in his tanned face that stared back at you. His crimson eyes were empty behind his black frames and his posture was completely still in his seat.

You’ll think he was a statue…

“Dr. O’Hara?” You called out to him which seemed to snap him from his thoughts. His red eyes slowly shifted to you, his tanned lips pulling into a small smile.

“Responsibility, my dear therapist, is such a heavy word…” He said with a smirk. “But I wish to ask, what compelled you to work with the mental? It’s a challenging profession for those with weaker minds.” Miguel said, casting an odd aura upon the room with his every word. “I should know…many say they are for the discovery of science and when the time presents itself, they get cold feet.” He stated, his finger ceasing its movement upon the armrest.

It wasn't unusual for a patient to desire to ask you a question, but the way he gazed at you with his intense eyes and how his gravelly voice caused a shiver to run down your spine made you hesitant, which the patient seemed to have noticed. “I only ask since you handle your job so beautifully.” He complimented, his eyes taking in your seated position. “I only wish to know what led you here before me.” The words left the patient’s lips in an ominous manner, however, upon saying such a thing his olive face held a smile that could melt anyone’s heart.

His fanged grin, oddly, sent a wave of warmth through your being and caused you to forget your reply to his question. You shifted in your seat, trying to keep your composure and recall your departed answer. “W-well, I…umm… entered this field by the simple fact of being interested in psychology a-and the way the mind works.” You replied once you found the words, unable to hide the stammering of your voice due to how unnerving everything was becoming. Miguel nodded slowly, running his tongue along the tip of his fang, the action drawing your attention.

“Your interest in the subject of the mind is rather…fascinating.” Abruptly, he leaned up in his seat, resting his elbows upon his knees and invading your personal space. Your heart skipped a beat at his suddenness and at being able to see just how abnormal and captivating his scarlet eyes and sharp fangs were; it caused goosebumps to rise upon your skin at the mere sight.

“I imagine I must seem like a puzzle that’s meant to be solved by you, don’t I, dear?” He asked, his gaze never letting up and keeping its intensity. Due to his closeness, you almost missed his inquiry, but upon detecting it, it surprised you. Hastily, you shook your head, dismissing his ideology and rejecting his notion. “N-No, I wouldn’t exactly describe you in that way, Dr. O’Hara.” You swiftly replied.

“You wouldn’t?” He asked, his voice low and slow. “So, how would you describe me, Doctor?” He grinned, the fluorescent lights of his room bouncing off his sharp fangs as his eyes were filled with a hint of amusement, though it was impossible to ignore how it seemed he was toying with you.

“I…see individuals, like you, as people who have become lost in the darkness and just need assistance in finding the light once more.” You stated, his eyebrow raising and a chuckle escaping him at your answer. “A bold claim…” He said, his eyes tracing your figure and lingering upon how tightly you were now grasping your skirt.

“For a little thing like you…”

Miguel muttered imperceptibly that you almost didn't hear him. “E-Excuse me?” You asked in shock and with furrowed eyebrows causing the patient to snicker, shaking his head. “Just that your view is a unique way of thinking and a…intriguing one, in fact.” He said, leaning back in his chair and adopting a relaxed position once more.

“It’s really fascinating how intellectual you are, doctor.” He grinned. “Few possess the ability to navigate the labyrinth of thoughts of the mental. I applaud you on that.” Miguel praised, returning back to running his palm along the white armrest whilst giving you his undivided attention.

In your gut, you knew his recalling of the statement said previously was false, you were certain he said something that was out of the norm.

But could you have mistaken?

You took in his face, taking note of how he gazed at you. The scientist was attractive, and normally during your job you were able to ignore that appealing quality and complete the task at hand, but right now, it seems impossible.

The way his red eyes ran along your body like he was undressing you, made you blush. You couldn’t explain it, but you were stuck between your desires and your sense of reason.

You were aware of Miguel’s sadistic mannerisms and how there could be a chance he wasn’t fully well as he lets on, it was why you were here, but the longer you spoke with him, the more the task at hand was leaving you.

However, you couldn’t shake the feeling of unease he gave you at times.

“M-May I ask how have you been feeling lately? Any changes?” You asked, changing the topic and settling your eyes upon Miguel once more to see him smirking. “It’s all been the same, doctor.” He began. “We have group therapies on Wednesday, daily morning activities and indoor activities…” He said, wetting his lips with the swipe of his tongue, the sight causing the tips of your ears to burn red.

Sometime while he was speaking, you shamefully zoned out to taking in how sexy he looked.

His white shirt tightly hugged his body, giving one a view of his hardened nipples, defined pecs, and washboard abs. Every curve of muscle was accentuated under the white fabric that teased anyone who saw. The muscles of his legs pressed against his gray sweatpants, and your eyes widened slightly at being able to make out the enormity that rested against his thigh. The sight causing you to bite your lip…

“Querida?”

The sexy patient called out to you, snapping you from your trance. “Y-Yes!?” You inquired, clearing your throat and taking a more assertive and relaxed position to try and dismiss your previous lack of professionalism. Miguel snickered. “It seemed you were off somewhere else…and here I thought that was my job.” He joked, causing you to chuckle nervously.

“M-My apologies. You may continue.” You replied, wishing to proceed as if none of that happened. Miguel smirked, his crimson eyes roaming along your body before his finger began to tap upon the armrest.

“In my leisure, I write in my journal, read, or tend to my plant.” He finished, keeping it short and gesturing to the bookshelf in the room that held a pot of beautiful flowers. You smiled seeing how the black flowers bloomed upon the shelf.

“May I ask, what is it that you write in your journal?” You asked, looking back at him to see his eyebrows furrowed. “It wouldn’t be ethical if I asked what you write in your diary, would it, doctor?” He inquired, causing you to instantly become regretful of your words. You casted him an apologetic look. “M-My apologies, I didn’t mean to intrude.”

“No…it’s fine. Your fascination is interesting…” He trailed off, a tap of his finger following your words. You glanced back over at his plant once more, the flower really captivating you. “The plant is family to the Calla Lilies.” Miguel answered before you could even ask, looking over at you as you continued to inspect the plant from your seat. “Hmm…I’ve never seen a plant like this.”

“Because this plant, in particular, is very rare.” He explained. “Native to South Africa, Escape, is a very rare find.” Miguel said with a fanged grin. “It’s why I made it mandatory that it was brought with me when I was assigned at NYS-MH.”

You stared in awe at the abnormally black flower. This was your first time seeing a plant of pitch blackness that hadn’t already withered away, but Miguel’s next words grabbed your attention.

“But one day while tending to my flowers, I hit an…epiphany of sorts.” Miguel told you, causing you to cock your head in puzzlement.

His words intrigued you…

“May I ask what epiphany you reached, Dr. O’Hara?” At your question, Miguel gave you a look of appreciation and sincerity. “I understand that upon my arrival, I wasn’t…in the best state of mind.” He said with a sigh. “But after being here, I feel like I’m ready.”

“Ready for what?” You asked, bringing a small smile to his lips. “I…believe I’m ready to see the world again.” He answered, giving you a genuine look of certainty.

His realization filled you with gratification. You reached for his brown folder, believing he had, indeed, improved. The first major step for the patient was seeing that they were initially unwell, which the patient had achieved.

“I’m greatly pleased with your recognition of this epiphany of yours, Dr. O’Hara.” You said, holding his folder in your hands. “But I believe you are ready to answer some more serious questions.” You said, glancing up at him. “Are you ready?” You asked, seeking permission of his state of mind before proceeding.

With a nod from Miguel, you opened his folder, pulling out a few of his documents to begin asking more serious questions regarding them. “I’ve noticed in your next of kin that you asked for them to not be aware of your mental treatment.” You began, looking up at Miguel to see him already gazing back at you, his crimson orbs trained on you. The sight made your heart flutter. “M-May I ask how you would cope on the outside without your familial relations knowing of t-the treatments and necessary tools you've learned whilst being here?” At your inquiry, Miguel’s face hardened, his crimson eyes darkening.

“Well, you see, my dear therapist, family can be a bit…overwhelming.” He uttered, tapping his finger against the armrest once more like a metronome; his eye contact never breaking. “I’ve decided to take a more independent route for now.” He explained in a deep, slow voice. “But friends, colleagues—people who don't burden me with unnecessary questions about the past are who I seek.” He said, his voice holding a hint of coldness as his jaw clenched.

“Because, it’s important to focus on the present and the future, rather than the past, don’t you think…

Doctor?”

You gulped, his words seeming to have you in a vice. It was as if he had some kind of control over you, all of the rules and regulations you learned whilst being an evaluation therapist at NYS-MH faded from your mind. You couldn’t figure out what you found so enticing about him.

Was it the way he looked or behaved? How he seemed to speak with such intellect in a tone of voice that could lull one to sleep?

You were puzzled…

But you were certain something was happening, and it was greatly affecting you and your ability to think clearly.

You hesitantly nodded, clenching his folder and feeling your cheeks redden once again. “T-That is correct.” You agreed, not believing what you were saying. “I would understand your desire to look past your previous mistakes and move forward.” You uttered, trying to keep your attention on the patient.

“Indeed…Mistakes.” He smirked, a small chuckle passing his lips, his finger seeming to tap against the armchair after your words. Your eyes looked from his hand and to his face, studying how his coffee-brown locks blowned gently in the breeze from the vent overhead, and to his defined cheekbones and broad nose that made him even more captivating…

“Have any more questions for me, doctor?”

You jumped at his inqury, noticing you were just staring at him.

What the hell was wrong with you?!

A little disheveled, you fumbled through the folder for the next pages of information you sought, picking up his documents on his treatment plan of medications and his incident reports. “Umm…I-I wanted to ask about your medications.” You began, wetting your lips and holding the papers up to hide behind them. “T-There were two occurrences where you refused to take your medication. M-may I ask why you refused?” You asked, peeking around the paper to see the patient adjust his black eyeglasses upon his face along with the repeated thudding of his finger upon the chair.

“I must ask, how would you feel if someone took away your identity?”

“W-what?!” You asked in surprise, lowering the pages hastily. A laugh rumbled from his broad chest, giving you a clear view of his otherworldly fangs that made the pit of your stomach twist into knots. “You heard me, doctor.” He stated in a manner that was to be amusing but only made one disturbed.

“What if someone was trying to force you to be someone else? Someone you are not?” He asked, causing you to chew your inner cheek and ponder his question. “I…I guess I wouldn’t like that.”

“Indeed…” He replied. “Any creature would despise the fact of forced transformation of oneself. It’s the reason you cannot simply change a savage tiger to being a tamed kitten in your home.” The dark-haired male explained. “It’s because a tiger would always cling to its savage ways, it's what keeps them alive—it’s what they enjoy.”

Thinking back, you wished at that moment you listened deeply to his analogy. Took in each word he uttered…but like an lovesick high-schooler, you bypassed it and fell hard for his wit.

“That’s…a great analogy, Dr. O’Hara.”

“Why thank you, dear.” Miguel replied with a smirk before his old expression shifted to hold furrowed eyebrows and a frown—a set of facial features that instantly tugged at your heart. “But…the true reason I refused my medication was because…” He heaved a deep sigh, biting his lip. “The depressants make me sleepy and tired all the time, and…the idea of having to depend on medicine to stabilize my irritability and emotions is rather disheartening to me.” He said in a sorrowful voice. “I refused them because I believe I can be better without them.”

You listened closely to his words, taking note of his concerns and feeling rather empathetic. “In all honesty, how would you explain your current mental health condition?” You asked, placing your compassionate eyes upon him.

He gave you a heartfelt smile, one that made your heart soar. “Like I said previously, I feel better, Doctor.” Miguel said in genuinely. “I’ve seen the errors in my ways and am deeply disgusted by what I’ve done to innocent individuals…t-too myself.” He said, looking away at the ground in shame.

“I wish to return back into society and start anew.” He replied. “Be the man that I’ve wanted to be—not some madman who allowed his idea to get too out of hand that led to the deaths of innocence.” Miguel professed to you with an emotional and hearty voice.

You nodded slowly as you noticed his scarlet eyes flicker down to your hands that held the brown folder. “Doctor…

May I?”

Dr. O’Hara asked, extending his large, calloused hand to you, seeking your palm. Your eyes widened, thickly gulping and looking back up to meet his red orbs that seemed to suck you in—enticing you to take it.

Physical connection with patients were strictly forbidden, but the sadden look of desperation upon his face led you to take his hand. You placed the brown folder upon the table before resting your hand in his large palm, and instantly yours looked to have shrunken in size. With a fluttering heart and belly, you met his eyes and instantly melted under his crimson eyes.

“Please, Cariño. I assure you, I’ll be on my best behavior.”

The patient affirmed, giving your hand an affectionate squeeze, following his heartfelt promise. Your breath caught in your throat at his genuine gaze and words.

From his evaluation, you couldn’t help but agree that he was ready…

He didn’t utter a word of sadism or show signs of insanity, revealing his first diagnosis of Psychopathy was treated or can be suppressed. He exhibited signs of sympathy for his victims, and also didn’t become angry at triggering questions, displaying that his second diagnosis of antisocial personality disorder was also cured or treated.

Like he said…

Dr. Miguel O’Hara was ready.

You gave him a small smile, placing your free hand atop of his as Miguel’s eyes shifted down to your kind gesture and back onto your face. “Okay…I believe you.” You said, caressing his knuckles with your thumb. “I’ll be sure to send in your evaluation report that you are good to go.” You told him, but as an evaluation therapist you weren’t supposed to say, but you couldn’t stop the words from spilling from your mouth.

Giving him a departed smile, you released his hands and collected your things. His touch still burned into your skin and left you yearning for more of him.

You felt his abnormal eyes on you as you went to the door. Suddenly, upon putting your hand on the doorknob, a cold shiver ran down your back—one that instantly made you come to a halt. Your eyebrows furrowed at the unsettling sensation, causing you to bite your lip in nervousness.

“And Miguel…” You called out to him, using his name and looking over your shoulder at the dark-haired male. His tanned, chiseled face held an expression of hidden joy and interest as he turned towards you, his attention captured by your call whilst he remained seated in his chair

You clenched the folder tightly, hastily shifting your gaze to meet his scarlet eyes—the previous feeling of discomfort and unease vanishing.

“I-I hope you keep your word.” You said in a voice full of reverence. Miguel returned your words with a reassuring smirk, his sharp canines poking from over his bottom lip.

“You have my word, Doctor. I’ll be on my best behavior.”

After turning in Dr. Miguel O'Hara’s evaluation report and going home, the scientist was still on your mind.

The way the doctor looked at you with his beautiful red eyes from behind his black spectacles, with a gaze of interest, to the fanged smiles and smirks he gave you—merely thinking about it made your cheeks redden.

You bit your lip, feeling a need to cure this desire for him, but you decided to push it away. You couldn’t feel this way about him…

You couldn’t…

…

But you did…

Extremely…

You lay under the blankets of your bed, tossing and turning as every time you closed your eyes to sleep, he would fill your mind.

Especially the glimpse you got of his package.

How his massive member was accentuated underneath the gray fabric of his sweatpants, revealing how thick and long he was.

The remembrance made you drool…

It had been forever since you’d touched yourself. Being a therapist at a mental facility was a rather time-consuming job, and you weren’t really interested in the many men who tried to get your attention.

Until him…

Why did it have to be him of all people?

It was a guilty pleasure, that was for sure—to have fallen so hard for this doctor, your patient who had many wounds that still needed healing.

But oddly, his wounds only pulled you in even more…

You bit your lip, allowing your hands to begin roaming along your body, imagining they were his calloused ones—remembering how his large hands practically engulfed yours when holding his hand, and how rough they felt.

Oh, how good it would feel if they were the ones touching you.

Giving your clothed breasts a squeeze through your shirt, you moaned softly. Despite his past of being sadistic and cruel to others, you imagined him being gentle with you—caressing your body and touching you in a way that stole your breath every time. You arched your back as your thumb barely flicked over your pebbled nipples, drawing a whimper from your lips.

Your panties were heavily drenched in your juices due to your core's insistent pleas for stimulation and touch. Finally satisfying yourself, with a sharp tug, you pulled your panties down, freeing your pulsating pussy.

You breathed a sigh of relief, hastily getting into a comfortable position on your back and allowing your legs to fall apart. With closed eyes, you allowed thoughts of Dr. O'Hara to guide your movements.

His massive hand ran along your abdomen, teasing you with his skilled fingertips and trailing lower. A gasp escaped your lips as your fingers brushed softly along your throbbing bud and soppy folds, spreading your juices along the sensitive area.

You imagined Dr. O'Hara above you, his red eyes gleaming in the moonlight as he smirked down at you, pressing his large middle finger into your entrance. You moaned, feeling his finger filling your tight walls.

Whimpers escaped your lips at how good his finger felt inside of you, your back arching in desire for more of him. His smirk broadened at your eagerness, as he slowly drew his finger out to the tip before pushing back in, quickly finding a rhythm and keeping at it with each thrust.

Your toes curled, burying your face in your inner elbow as you continued to finger your wet pussy, wishing Dr. O'Hara was here, but imagining would have to do. It wasnt long before a heat began to pool in your lower belly, your breathing picking up.

"Taking my fingers so well, dear," Dr. O'Hara whispered into your ear, gently nipping along your lobe and throat, his fangs grazing your skin. You whined into your arm, his fingers picking up speed and hooking just right inside your pussy, bringing you to your blissful end.

With a loud cry, your thighs trembled horribly as your juices spilled in hot spurts, soaking your hand and the sheets underneath.

Your eyes fluttered close, trying to overcome the buzz that overwhelmed your body after your release. It took a moment, but when you caught your breath and your vision settled, you withdrew your fingers from your pussy, casting your eyes upon them to see that they, not Dr. O'Hara's, were covered in your juices. You exhaled in disappointment.

Despite how good it felt imagining it was him, you couldn't help wanting Dr. O'Hara in the physical…

"I imagine I must seem like a puzzle that’s meant to be solved by you, don’t I, dear?"

As you lay there, still tinglinh from your pleasurable moment, his words filled your head, leaving you to ponder his question once more.

Did you believe him to be a puzzle that only you could solve? In the moment, you said no, but deep down, you wanted nothing more than to thoroughly fix him.

Like many patients upon being released, they still faced numerous challenges, including reentering society, finding a job, and avoiding triggers, after departing from NYS-MH.

He was going to need help, and with all your heart, you wanted to be there for him.

And you were going to.

No matter what…

A/N: I hope you all enjoyed the first part of 'Tangled in his Webs.' 😆I really enjoyed writing Miguel in this persona as it was different and honestly fun, especially with him being a darker character. It was rather new for me writing in this manner, despite some challenges here and there, I'm overall proud of the outcome and I hope you are too!

@migueloharacumslut, thanks so much for the request, and I hope you are even more happier that it's to be more than one part, lol. But once again, thank you for reading, hope you enjoyed!

Make sure to like, comment, reblog, and follow! If you'd like to add a request to the kink series, Entangled Desire, or have an idea in general, just message me or submit an ask. I hope you all have a wonderful day and stay safe! 💙💙

<3 Taglist:

@oscarissac2099 @powerful-niya @szapizzapanda @mcmiracles @mreowmoreww @thedeva @jadeloverxd @lazyotakuofficial @migueloharacumslut @nattywatty @homewreckingwreck @kinkybandages @prazinos @huniedeux @impossiblebagelcowboyfreak @anniee-mr @crimin4llyins4ne @lynxslokley @rice-wife @oharasfilipinawife @migueloharastruelove @rodriash002 @e1f-boi @user3732094737 @truth-dare-spin-bottles @taleiak @alurafairy

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koolades-world · 22 days

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hiii i was wondering if you could write abt an asian mc ? with the brothers or the dateables i don't mind! i just think it would be funny to see yk asian mc who's a high achiever (so even at RAD when they know nothing abt magic they'll try to score high), always take off their shoes before entering a place (entering a place with shoes is forbidden !!), always cook rice or stuff from their country when on cooking duties ("wdym we already ate that when it was my turn last time?"), will make you special herbal tea if you're sick (first time i suggested to make tea for my ill white friend they laughed :( ), tells you to eat more and in the same fashion, whose love language is giving you food, etc... bonus point if mc swears in their mother tongue. And if the MC was living in their native country before going to the devildom, their ability to just nap anywhere as if it's normal.

As someone who grew up in an asian household it's just regular to me but i can picture the face Lucifer would make if the first time mc enter Dia's castle they take off their shoes casually or like MC stuffing Beel's mouth with food as if he just didn't swallow the biggest mouthful of udon ever saying "come on Beel you need food, you need strength to play Fangol"

For the nap thing i was thinking about my relatives who take nap on their wooden bad or just the floor during summer (cause its fresh yk). My grandma always said a hard bed is good for the back lol

Anyway no pressure!! Have a nice day and take care !

hi!! yes of course :)

i'm a different flavor of asian but some of the culture overlaps so this was fun to write! haha the amount of times my grandma has urged me to eat more is hard to count. oh and the amount of tea i drank when we went to visit. i'll never forget watching her make the tea because it was a whole experience

i'm half indian and someone actually requested an indian mc so that will be out tomorrow because doing these requests back to back easiest for me!

enjoy <3

Asian Mc

Lucifer

you're ALWAYS on him for the amount of coffee he drinks

you also always make sure he takes a break to eat dinner because he needs to eat in order to continue his work

despite how bothered he might seem sometimes, he really does value what you do for him

plus, you not only keep yourself in line, sometimes you do his brothers for him too. thanks on his behalf!

Mammon

once you grow closer, he's asking you to teach him swear words so he can cuss out lucifer

if you don’t, well, he’ll just pick them up when you swear and hope he can figure out what it means haha

if you want, feed him random words, or even compliments so when lucifer hears them, he'll just be confused haha

despite the fact that he's the demon, maybe you can help him in class

Levi

when he first meets you, he'd not sure what to expect

however he quickly learns you're the best at everything you do

this includes video games and everything of that manner

he's got competition now, but he has no clue how you got so good considering it was probably your first time at all of the games you've tried

Satan

he's impressed by your work ethic and desire to achieve

you got dropped in a totally new environment and instead of struggling to adjust like he predicted, you bounced back almost immediately and were at the top of your class like it was nothing!

he tried to ask you once why you seemed so determine to get the best grade and never asked again after the look you gave him

something the two of you can bond over, though, is tea! he can often be seen with a cup of tea so that's an easy conversation starter between the two of you if not homework instead

Asmo

while initially he thought you two might not get along, you actually do quite well

he's huge on no shoes in the house and especially in his room

after all, he wants to avoid bringing as many outside germs into his room as possible

can and will ask you to teach him how you make your special herbal teas because he hates being sick and genuinely just wants to know

Beel

he falls in love with your rice cooker

rice that easy and that quick? sign him up! if he didn't already love rice you've put him on it

he doesn't think he could ever part with you and your wonderful cooking

even if you do cook the same thing every time it's your turn, he will inhale it because not only is it delicious, but you're an amazing cook

Belphie

even he's impressed by your ability to fall asleep anywhere

at least he's always with his pillow and maybe a blanket but he's seen you just curled up on the porch waiting for someone to get home

but that sighting was rare, because he felt like he always saw you doing something

however he really appreciated all the little things you did for him, such as making his bed

#obey me #obey me!#obey me x reader #obey me satan #obey me beel #obey me mammon #obey me asmo #obey me lucifer #obey me levi #obey me belphie #obey me belphegor #obey me beelzebub #obey me asmodeus #obey me leviathan #obey me shall we date #obey me! shall we date #obey me! shall we date?

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fandomaya · 6 months

Text

Culinary Comfort

Pairing: Kento Nanami x Reader

CW: Food is heavily mentioned, some overthinking and insecurities on reader's part, Gojo is mentioned once (lol), use of petnames, just being fluffy and indulgent! (a suggestive implication at the end, ig?), not proofread as usual

WC: 765

Summary: Just exploring how shared love for food can create little comforting memories between you and Kento

You know Kento is the type of guy to take you to different premium eateries which range from restaurants to pâtisseries and the likes of that. He just loves the expression on your face which is of pure concentration, but all that makes him fondly smile is your cute little frown with an even cuter pout on your lips, all just trying to decide on what you want to eat from the wide variety of delicacies.

But he hates to see the hesitance on your features, and he knows why you feel that even. You genuinely feel at times you should not indulge much no matter how delicious the dishes may seem. Also, the fact that these are so expensive and your partner, Kento always pays for them, makes you feel guilty of burdening him.

But Kento doesn’t know how to make you realize that he loves to see you eat, to see the satisfaction on your face when you close your eyes and let out pleased soft noises as soon as the flavors meet your taste buds. You already have seen how he loves to help you out in the kitchen and most of the weekends he even tries out a new recipe for you which he is sure that you would savor. You can undoubtedly say that food is a love language of Kento.

So coming back to eateries, one fine day, he takes you out to a café that had opened a few weeks ago, and he tried it out himself too, unfortunately with Gojo after a mission. But fret not! Because this time he wants to have a better and peaceful experience with you since he loves to introduce you to new things and experiences.

So similar things happen this time as well. Upon entering, the aroma of freshly brewed coffee and sweet pastries envelops you. The subtle hum of conversations of other patrons creates a cozy ambiance on this bright weekend. You both take a table near the glass windows that look out at the busy street. The menu arrives, its pages whispering promises of delightful flavors, and he is fondly looking at your confused face of trying to pick something for yourself. But then as soon as the waitress comes in to take your order, Kento is quick to take over and surprise you. You never expected him to place an order where he requests to bring one serving from every item under the specials section.

As you open your mouth to speak, Kento preemptively squeezes your hand, a silent reassurance that halts your words. He smiles at the waitress so that he goes away before he brings in the requested delicacies. In a hushed tone, you find yourself blurting out your concerns to Kento, trying to explain that it’s probably too much and that he shouldn’t carelessly spend much money, plus you will gain weight, which seems unfavorable.

His words are often sparse, but his actions speak volumes. So he just gets up and drags his chair near to yours. He sits back down, holds your hands, and rubs your palms in comforting circles. He murmurs, “Look at me, sweetheart”' his voice a gentle melody that resonates in the quiet intimacy of the moment. Your gaze drops to your lap, worry etched in your eyes as if confessing a pang of hidden guilt, in some subconscious shame of indulgence.

With a tender touch, he lifts your chin, encouraging you to meet his gaze. His eyes are so soft and kind, that it almost makes you want to cry for burdening him with your petty, annoying habits. But he just says, “Listen to me carefully, love.” His words are a tender reassurance in the midst of your worries. “It is fine to eat more if you want to. I know you love to eat, and it is completely okay to indulge once in a while. We are not doing this everyday, are we?”. You nod your head, and he just kindly smiles while rubbing your cheek, not caring if anyone sees or judges.

What is his priority is to make you comfortable and keep you happy. Plus, he doesn’t care if you gain weight or anything. He reassures you, 'It's more than good; I love the softness of you.' His words carry a warmth that transcends the physical, embracing the entirety of your being. He knows that he would just get more of you to love and worship back at home, in the sanctity of your shared existence, so that you truly know how he loves all of you.

a/n: This was really self-indulgent, but I felt like writing it. I just love to eat and feed my loved ones with good food too. But I hate the guilt that sometimes creep in some of us, which makes us hesitant to delve in full sensory experience of culinary treats. If you reach till the end, thank you for reading, and I hope you eat well always <333

#nanami header is made by me and dividers by @saradika #jujutsu kaisen x reader #nanami x reader #jjk x reader #jujutsu kaisen fluff #jjk fluff #nanami fluff #nanami kento x reader #nanami kento x you #nanami kento #kento nanami x reader #jjk kento #jujutsu kaisen drabbles

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1111jenx · 9 months

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Jen haiii I missed you so much. Gurl tell me some chart placements that have completely altered your previous views on them after meeting irl. Stereotypes about signs you've found completely wrong after getting to know them. I'm dying to know the placements that truly shook you to your core, comparing your astrological studies and real life experiences with them.

Hi love,

I'm literally that one person that will ask for your birth time, birth date and location after 5 minutes of meeting yk so trust me when I say, I do have many stories to tell LOL. Before I start tho, I do need to mention that this is based off my own experiences purely and again, this is just for fun:D So please enjoy this post and let me know what you think in the comment<3

Mini Interesting Astrology Observations

- stereotypes vs. irl edition

— The amount of time I heard people telling me that Leo Rising is a ray of sunshine when in reality they can be, however not at first 100%. The way they come off are extremely practical, even a little bit distant at first. They have this powerful yet quiet aura to them. What I would say tho is that they enjoy the company of people who feels like sunshine, its just something about goodness in people that gets to Leo Rising. They adore a sweetheart always.

— I would even go as far to say that all Fire Rising initially have a hint of distance. Aries Rising can appear intimidating, truly living up to their stereotype with their nonchalant demeanor. But beneath that exterior, they possess genuinely kind hearts, though sometimes their delivery might be a bit raw. Leo Rising commands respect with their mere presence. Sagittarius Rising aligns closely with their stereotype, but remember the Water 12th houses of the Fire Risings:.

Pisces 12th house - Aries Rising: Hiding their unselfishness and uncondinational side to protect themselves.

Cancer 12th house - Leo Rising: Hiding their nurturing side and soft-heartedness to ensure they're respected or perceived in a serious way.

Scorpio 12th house - Sagittarius Rising: Hiding their devotion and secretive side out of fear of being taken advantage of.

— Libra Moon is an extremely interesting placement for me to see. People usually think they're pushovers typically but like.. lets be for real. They're just nice and they like to be perceived that way. But the second they can sense that hint of disrespect, all hell break loose LOL. They're extremelyyyy opionated people and for them, respect is something they believe they have worked very hard for. Mediators at core though, always see different sides but doesn't mean they can be one of the most stubborn people ever :)

— Scorpio Venus justifying their intense feelings is the funniest thing ever. They can 100% be very devoted in relationship but the thing is, a lot of Scorpio Venus are never ever gonna give themselves to you if they sense that you're not committed to them or even the little hint that you're not in it for real. Remember, this is a Scorpio placement we're talking about. Their pickiness can even outshine Virgo Venus on a good day. The type to genuinely stalk your socials and disappear at the blurriest red flag. For them to take you seriously, you have got to be all about them in every single way, they don't want that fleeting romance, when they're in, they're in. Playing games might be fun at first for them but they're are not going to be around to entertain anything as such for long.

— Sun conjuncts Venus gets along so well with women. A lot of their friends are usually women and it seems that they just know how to put people at ease. There's an energy of almost androgyny about them in the sense that they have a great balance of energies. Can easily befriend anyone.

— Libra Mars forgives often but usually its very logical. One of the best boundary setter I've ever seen. They are sweethearts don't get me wrong but they can easily put you in your place while still being the sweetest angel ever.

— Sagittarius Sun are extremely ambitious people. They're very very driven. While they enjoy letting loose, they're equally devoted to their work and aspirations. From my experience, they're the kind who would invest months into a project, only to celebrate grandly once it's accomplished. They truly embody the 'work hard, play hard' spirit.

— There's a stereotype that pegs Aquarius Mercury as detached and overly rational, almost robotic in their communication. But as you dive deeper, you realize this couldn't be farther from the truth. While they do possess an innate ability to see the bigger picture and communicate ideas ahead of their time, there's a depth and warmth to them that often goes unnoticed. These are some of the smoothest talkers. Contrary to the belief that they're disinterested in personal stories, many Aquarius Mercury individuals are deeply curious about individual journeys and narratives. I also noticed that since they can be so nice to talk to, people just casually open up to them about literally anything.

— I saw squares aspects synastry plays out in real life and often times its honestly super funny. Its like 2 people that speak 2 different languages trying to get the same thing but don't want to admit it out of pride LOL. I'm not a big fan when there's too much squares within personal placements but to be fair, they promote hella growth. After these kind of relationships, everyone just kinda become either more stubborn with their values or extremely open-minded LOL

— While Taurus Moon is very emotionally reliant, in the sense that they're their own safe haven and therapy guide a lot of the times. These people also may be prone to denial. They take time to come to terms with a lot of events that happened and kind of just buried it sometimes until they fully accept it. Unhealthy coping mechanisms as well but with time, they find their own peace in the truth.

— Earth Risings, lets talk. They got to be one of the funniest people alive. Their sense of humour always hits and they're the living proof for don't judge a book by its cover. Everytime I'm with them I always hurt my stomach by laughing too much PLS. However, when time calls for it, they can sit down and get all corporate on you trust😉

This has been surprisingly kind of fun, please let me know if you'd like to see more of this in the future:))

love,

saint jenx🪐

#astrojenx #astrology #astro notes #astrology observations #astrology notes #leo venus #libra rising #astro community #leo #astrology community #libra

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personasintro · 2 years

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monachopsis | 08

↳ 𝐬𝐲𝐧𝐨𝐩𝐬𝐢𝐬; after receiving unpleasant news that doesn’t allow you to grow your family, your husband comes up with an idea that unfortunately involves his brother whom he despises

⇢ 𝐩𝐚𝐢𝐫𝐢𝐧𝐠: tattoo artist!yoongi x reader

⇢ 𝐠𝐞𝐧𝐫𝐞: angst, fluff, smut, mini series

⇢ 𝐰𝐚𝐫𝐧𝐢𝐧𝐠𝐬: explicit language, toxic parents (nothing new lol)

⇢ 𝐰𝐨𝐫𝐝 𝐜𝐨𝐮𝐧𝐭: 15k+

↳ chapter index

⇠ prev. | next ⇢

It's been two months and you still can't believe it.

You're not quite sure what you're going through. On the outside, you try to be happy and content, desperately trying to convince yourself that this is something you've been waiting for. The journey to get there has been messy and it affected you more than you could've ever imagined. But nobody knows that. Nobody knows about the inner battles you're facing every hour, even every minute of your day.

The little life growing inside of you is… an overwhelming feeling to say the least. It's a huge reminder.

Yeonseok is thrilled, and has been from the moment he found you standing in the bathroom, barely able to comprehend the news. He's ten times happier, always smiling and making sure you have everything you need – not that he hasn't been doing that before. Now he doesn't allow you to clean and often, you have to remind him you're not even in that stage of being pregnant.

If it wasn't for the famous morning sickness, you would barely know it. It's still early for you to experience the different uncomfortable symptoms and struggles. However, you can't pinpoint whether the pregnancy is to be blamed for the frequent throwing up or your own conscience. You don't want to make it sound as if your mental health is on a bad path. More like the guilt is making your life tough. But no one is really to blame.

Realizing, you spend your time trying to constantly convince yourself just for you to end up with the same miserable ache in your chest. It's not good for the baby, that's what you often say in your inner and silenced thoughts that no one ever hears.

With Yeonseok too excited, he wasn't waiting too long to drop the news to his parents who, to be completely honest, have been just as thrilled. They've showered you with so much love, not hiding how excited they're about their unborn first grandchildren. They don't know the whole truth though. You're not sure if it's something you'd share with them. That would be fucking weird, let's be honest.

It feels like Yeonseok is too prideful to admit the truth. It feels embarrassing to do so as well. You're not sure if you could face your parents-in-law. But it feels wrong to be lying not just to them, but to yourself and in general. You're no saint, but all of it feels wrong.

Just like the fancy birthday dinner you've been invited to. It's Mrs. Min's birthday and apparently, she doesn't want to make it a big party which is so unlike her. It's been a couple of days since you've visited Min's residence. They made sure to invite you more often which you don't find particularly annoying or anything close to it. But having Mins right there in front of you… it reminds you how badly you, all of you, have fucked up with this deal. It should've been so easy but it's the exact opposite.

Mrs. Min places a greek salad on the table, the amount of food could surely feed a whole village, as she sits down with the biggest smile she so kindly gives you. It's hard to think of her as a bad person. But you can't help it and think about what he told you. You've experienced her to look frustrated, amongst other things, when it came to this one person.

The not so Korean food looks appetizing, though you're ready to dig into the steak instead, as its smell fills up your nostrils. The first bite tastes divine and you almost hum and moan from the delicious taste. In the midst of your second bite, Maria – their maid in her late fifties who has been with the Min's family since their sons were kids – apologizes for the disturbance and informs the family about someone's arrival.

“Mr. Min is here, m'am.” she adds, stating the reason for her disturbance.

The fork in your hand almost clinks against the expensive ceramic of your plate, but your hold tightens around it. The moment Maria excuses herself to prepare the dessert in the meantime, you swear your whole stomach strains as nausea hits you. You know it's no morning sickness or the delicious dish prepared by Maria and the chef in Min's kitchen. It's the damn psyche of having to see him again because he's here.

Despite today being his mother's birthday dinner, the thought of him coming over went over your head. Him coming makes sense but at the same time – it doesn't. He never comes at family dinners, very rarely and the shock on your in-laws faces tells you they're just as surprised. Yeonseok scoffs silently on your left, the sound not going unnoticed by you but you decide not to react.

Your heart hammers in your chest and you've lost all your appetite, nerves slowly crawling to every cell in your body.

“Well, what surprising news.” Mrs. Min fills the silence, and even though her voice doesn't hold any hostility, she doesn't sound pleased or even happy to hear her second son came. She simply voices her thoughts as if the topic is about the most casual or random thing ever.

Mr. Min hums, reaching for his glass of wine before a set of footsteps come closer and closer. With each step and second, you feel like flying out of the stool and hiding yourself somewhere in this huge house. You're nervous.

Nervous to see him again after you ended everything. It's stupid, what was going on between you could be considered purely as a business and you know you did what was for the best. Things were about to get too messy and you couldn't let that happen.

But you're also scared shitless. The thought of seeing him again shouldn't affect you this much and you're completely aware of this fact. The guilt – and so does the nausea – rises but before you can excuse yourself to use the restroom, not caring how weird that would look suddenly, Yoongi in the flesh stops at the entrance of the dining room.

It's not just you who naturally look at him because of his arrival or sounds of his footsteps, you all look up from your plates to stare at him. His hair color is different, you immediately notice since you're not met with his usual black hair and are shocked to see the silver color. His whole appearance is rather unexpected.

He stands there wearing a suit, looking the most elegant you've ever seen him. He's giving a completely different vibe and if you didn't know him, you would think he's someone else. It's weird to think how he suddenly fits into this family and you can tell he holds the same power every Min family member does.

The tattoos are hidden from everyone's sight and the most eye-catching feature is currently his hair color. He looks astonishing.

He scans the room, almost surprised to see just the four of you as his eyes stop at you for a moment. Your breath gets caught in your throat and you swear you stop breathing for a moment, anticipating whatever is about to come. But then he looks away and averts his gaze at his parents instead – and you hate how that pains you.

“Yoongi,” His mother says, not hiding her surprise. “We thought you wouldn't come.”

“It's your birthday, mother.” Yoongi informs as if she didn't know that.

Despite Yoongi avoiding any family gatherings and their sore relationship, Yoongi would always make sure to at least drop a gift to one of his parents whenever it's their birthday. He wouldn't often spend the day with them, or attend any parties they are used to throwing, but he tried his best to at least give them something.

After the failures of any parties he attended, it was just safer for him to avoid them all. Even though he was painted as the bad guy who doesn't care about anything, not even his parents.

But he came now – bearing a gift in the form of a small paper bag.

And then he moves and you watch every single step he takes toward the table, stopping beside his mother as she stands up with a hand over her chest as she notices the gift. Yoongi takes her hand into his big ones, rings adoring his long fingers as his lips brush against her cheeks before he wishes her a happy birthday. She thanks him, smiling the first time since he came here as she places the gift on the floor to check it out later.

Maybe she didn't want to disturb the dinner, but you still can't help but think she could've at least looked at the gift her son bought her. Does she even care about the gift?

But Yoongi doesn't look phased one bit, unbuttoning his suit as he sits at the free seat which happens to be right in front of you. Your eyes meet for a split second and you quickly look away, not having the strength to look at him any longer.

The table is huge but it wouldn't make sense for him to have a seat a few seats from everyone. You know he didn't have much choice but right now, having him right in front of you makes your legs shake in nervosity.

“We're glad you came tonight, son.” Mr. Min says at the head of the table.

Yoongi meekly nods before Maria comes again, ready to serve Yoongi his food as he simply puts his hand up. “I'm fine to serve my own food, thank you Maria.”

She looks a little perplexed at Yoongi's parents, but offers Yoongi a soft smile before she bows and retrieves back to the kitchen, informing dessert is ready whenever you're ready.

Yoongi serves his own food, his movements gentle and you gulp at the sight of his veiny hands as they reach to the bowl of roasted parmesan baby potatoes.

“Honey, does the steak not taste good?” Yeonseok speaks next to you, his hand on top of your thigh as you jump in your spot, staring at him with wide eyes. He cocks his head at your plate, noticing you've taken only one bite so far and seem to be not hungry at all.

With his question, Yeonseok attracts everyone's attention at the table and you gulp, giving him a tensed smile. “No, it's delicious.”

“Yeonseok, stop questioning her. You know how–”

Almost feeling like what she's about to say, you interrupt Mrs. Min's in the midst of her sentence knowing how rude that looks because you've never done that before. But you couldn't help it.

“It's delicious. Really.” you assure them, forcing yourself to take a second bite but instead of the good taste, all you want is to spit it out.

Your mother-in-law looks a little surprised by your interruption but she shakes herself out of it, offering you a gentle smile as she reaches for her red wine. However, she has different plans than just leaving the topic, Yeonseok's question and everything about it reminding her of the obvious.

“Yoongi, you should congratulate your brother. And Y/N.”

This time, you don't manage to catch the fork as it loudly clanks against the plate and you nervously apologize. Mrs. Min sounds ecstatic, cheerful at her words as she beams at both of you, your unusual behavior going completely unnoticed as everyone beams in the room. Well, your in-laws do as they shoot bright smiles your way. They're happy, it's nice to witness it but it's the least of things you can focus on.

Yoongi arches his brow, leans against his stool as he glances at his mother. “Congratulate?”

“Your big brother is about to be a father.”

The whole world stops.

At least it feels like that. Your stomach churns uncomfortably and you hate yourself how automatically you look at Yoongi. His features remain neutral, staring at his mother before he averts his sharp and dark gaze at you. Holy shit.

You've no idea what Yoongi thinks right now. Does he think you're a liar? You did tell him you're not pregnant – but only because you didn't know at that time. You made it seem as if you're helping him despite him not reaching the end of your deal. All of this is fucking messy. A fucking mess you can't seem to get out of.

And then he glances at his brother, forcing you to look at your husband as well as he stares sharply at Yoongi as if he's daring him to say something. He's tense and not in his usual relaxed posture as he glares the hell out of Yoongi.

But Yoongi only stares back at him, neutral almost like a robot before he opens his mouth and lets out a mere; “Congrats.”

His parents stare and clear their throats at the same time, biting back any distasteful remarks about Yoongi's lack of enthusiasm. That's what pisses them off. The lack of emotions he shows. It shows how controlling of him they want to be.

But Yoongi comes here like a king, showing them they can't control him.

You start noticing the little details even more now.

It's funny because the two brothers are wearing the same type of clothing, but both of them radiate completely different energy. You look at your husband and you see an attractive man. Both of them are attractive just in different ways and you hate that Yoongi is the one who makes your stomach flutter with a set of butterflies. It's just his looks and energy.

By asking to be excused, you would draw even more attention and you don't want anyone to feel like there's something going on. So you stay seated in your spot, bracing to take the stupid fork again along with knife.

For the rest of the dinner, you try to get as much food as it's possible into your stomach, swallowing down any urge to push the plate away. Your in-laws mostly talk through it along with Yeonseok as they talk about business and all sorts of stuff you don't care to listen to.

Yoongi, sitting on the opposite side from you, remains silent too as he chews on the food until his plate is empty. When Maria comes back with the dessert, a molten chocolate cake, you barely eat a half of it which is truly a shame. You were so excited for tonight's food, knowing it's always delicious and your in-laws are very precise when it comes to food and inviting someone over, whether it's for lunch or dinner.

You can't help it though. It's your nerves acting up and even your recent sweet cravings won't save you this time. Luckily, nobody voices your non-eager attitude when it comes to food, and this time you don't even care how it might look. All of that is somewhere back in your mind, if even, because all you can focus on is the man sitting not far away from you. You're practically right in front of his eyes, fully exposed to him even though he doesn't look your way. At least you think he doesn't.

You act as if he's not there, not even glancing his direction though you're more than aware of his presence. You don't feel his burning eyes on you – you're not sure if you want to. Yet it feels like there's many unspoken things between you, and him ignoring you too doesn't sit well with you. Which is selfish, you're aware, because you're doing the same thing.

So when the dessert is over and everyone continues to drink the expensive alcohol of each of their choice, Yoongi excuses himself to get some fresh air and he gets dismissed, even though he truly doesn't care. He leaves his seat and disappears further down the house.

Should you go talk to him?

You feel like you should.

But are you ready?

Not at all.

What are you going to say to him? You've no idea where to start or what you want to tell him at all. There's just this feeling that pushes you to go and talk to him.

Plus you don't want to make any bad blood with Yeonseok. It's already enough that he looked annoyed at Yoongi's sudden presence and unexpected arrival. The reason behind it is your pregnancy without doubt. No matter how Yeonseok says the baby is his, he knows biologically it is not. None of you can change that.

And you don't want to give him any reason to doubt you, or want to make him feel like you want to get closer to his brother. Not at all. It's better if you stay away from him – that much is clear.

Maybe living with this guilt is your price for ever agreeing to your husband's ridiculous plan. He's not one to blame though. You agreed after all.

So why the hell do you stand up after softly patting the corners of your lips, excusing yourself to use the restroom?

You know the restroom is not a place you're going to visit. Navigating your way through the house, you get to the backdoor that leads to a large garden and even before opening the tall and big glass door, you already spot Yoongi leaning against a pillar. A cigarette between his two fingers as he brings it closer to his mouth as he takes a drag.

Quietly but not too subtly, you open the door and sneak into the chilly night where stars surround the dark sky. The automatic lights already inform him about your presence, if the sound of the door opening hasn't.

But he doesn't react.

He never looks up. Nor even glances in your direction as he continues to smoke as if he's still alone, despite your figure coming closer.

Taking a shaky breath, you grow even more nervous to be facing him, no… to talk to him, again. Is he even aware of your presence? He must be. There's no way he doesn't know.

But much to your luck, it seems like he decides to put you out of your misery once he looks up, no longer staring into the distance or at his black elegant boots. The suit is gone and he stands before you in a white button-up, some of his tattoos slightly visible through the thin fabric. Averting his eyes right at you, no shock is evident on his neutral and expressionless face, he remains silent.

“Hi.” you stupidly offer into the thick air, not averting your gaze as much as you would want to.

A beat of silence follows.

“Hi.” he says back after a moment.

You hug your arms, rubbing your forearms to mask your nervosity as you bite into your lower lip harshly. Nobody takes any initiative in starting a conversation and you know it has to be you. You came to him after all. Not the other way around.

If you didn't come to him, there's a big possibility Yoongi wouldn't approach you. It didn't seem like he wanted to, to be honest.

Opening your mouth, no words come out of it as you ponder about your next words. But once you actually think of saying something, Yoongi beats you to it and his deep voice reaches your ears.

“What do you want, Y/N?”

He's straight-forward. Perhaps a little bit too much and you actually find yourself slightly offended by the question and the tone of it.

Okay. No beating around the bush. You got it.

So far it feels like Yoongi wants to have nothing to do with you. Not that you can't blame him.

“I didn't lie to you.” you blurt out suddenly.

He watches you, his features not changing even a bit before he slightly cocks his head to the side. He takes another drag, aiming his face in the opposite direction as a cloud of smoke leaves his mouth.

“I didn't know I was pregnant when I… talked to you the last time.” you specify as he remains silent before a silent chuckle leaves his mouth.

He finishes smoking, the cigarette now short and almost all used as he hollows his cheeks while he takes a deep inhale of it. Once he's done, he presses the cigarette against the white pillar which makes your breath hitch as he throws the stud on the grass. He doesn't bother to go to the nearest bin and throw it out.

His mother will be surely ecstatic once she finds it.

“Congratulations.” he says somehow dryly, but maybe that's just his usual way of distancing himself.

You don't expect him to be over the moon with the news. All of this is weird and his lack of reaction just proves to you that he doesn't really think much about this situation. You know what the deal was and the child growing inside you is not his. No matter how biologically that is incorrect. It's not like you expected him to give you some kind of reaction, other than the pure ignorance and a lack of interest he's showing.

“Congratulations?” you mutter back just as dryly, his dark eyes watching you.

“What do you want me to say, Y/N?” he sighs.

At the sound of your name, your heart clenches at how cold he sounds.

“I came here to tell you that I didn't lie to you. I didn't know and I only found out after we talked.”

Yoongi didn't know it for sure. You didn't know when you came to his place to put an end to everything. Clearly, he was aware of all the risks because there was still a chance. Fuck, it would be such a bad luck if you didn't get pregnant after all those times he fucked you just in one night.

But then a notification popped on his screen and his bank account has suddenly grown into something it never has before. The exact money that all of you settled on was now sitting in his bank account.

To be completely truthful, Yoongi didn't think you would be able to convince Yeonseok to send him the money. Yeonseok is stubborn, in a completely different way than Yoongi is and whatever has to do with him, he knows Yeonseok is even ten times more stubborn than normally. He hasn't had the chance to see much of your marriage and relationship, yet he knows Yeonseok is much softer around you. You're his wife after all and maybe there's some truth to it that people we love bring out the best in us.

So he thought you somehow convinced him.

And when he decided to come here and celebrate his mother's birthday, the last thing he expected to find out is that you really are pregnant after all. But is it that much of a shock? Somehow he settled with the thought that you aren't.

Maybe you decided to get a sperm donor after all, that's what he thought.

But according to your words, nothing like that has happened and you're pregnant thanks to him.

“Relax,” he sighs, “I didn't even think of you lying. I mean it's probably for the best that it ended up like this, no?”

You frown a little. “What do you mean?”

“I felt fucking bad for getting the money without you getting a part of your deal. So now that you actually got it, there shouldn't be any bad feelings.”

He makes it sound so easy, yet you feel like your heart is cracking for some reason. And you're fucking confused because you don't know what you want him to say. You don't know how you want him to react. The only thing you know is that none of this feels right and it's a fucking mess. And the same guilt is slowly crawling all over your body.

“Right.” you gulp, hearing your heartbeat in your ears as you try to utter a few words but nothing comes out.

Your head feels heavy and what feels like anxiety engulf your body. Even your legs feel like jelly and you hate yourself for wearing heels tonight, even though they're not that high to begin with. You stumble on the spot, your eyes widening in shock as you expect the worst. Luckily, Yoongi is close and even though the single stumble wouldn't make you fall, Yoongi places his hands around your forearms and holds you steady.

“Are you okay?” he asks, leaning his face closer to you as he tries to inspect your face.

Nodding, you swallow the uncomfortable lump in your throat rather dryly and despite your confirmation that you're okay, you look anything but it.

You're shocked. Shocked yourself. Shocked by this situation. You're exhausted, wanting to escape from the constant guilt and never-ending discontent you're feeling.

“Come on. You should sit down or go inside.” Yoongi mutters but you don't move, eyes wide in shock as you can't react in any way.

Your mind is whirling, you're completely aware of what's happening even though you're confused too. But your body seems to not react.

“Hey, come on talk to me,” Yoongi offers softly, taking your chin between his fingers as he makes you look at him.

His sharp eyes are set on you, a small frown adoring his face. “How far along are you? Is that what people ask pregnant women?”

Something snaps in you and a breathless laugh escapes your mouth. Yoongi's lips twitch and he nods his head to encourage you to answer.

“Two months?” There's a tilt to your tone that makes it sound like a question and Yoongi laughs a little.

“Are you asking me?”

You laugh, shaking your head as Yoongi slowly lets go of your arms and inspects you with his eyes once more. “I don't know. People have this stupid tendency to talk about everything in weeks when it comes to pregnancy and babies, and I'm confused over it.”

Yoongi snorts, “You and I both. I don't know shit about pregnancy.”

“I like your hair.” you blurt out and you don't fail to notice the brief look of surprise shadowing Yoongi's features until he lets out a breathy chuckle, brushing his fingers through his now silver hair.

“You do? Thought my mother would have some kind of snarky comment about it but she didn't.”

You laugh, eyes glancing at the top of his head again. Yeonseok would never dye his hair, you're sure about that. It's one of the many things that differs him and Yoongi.

“I never knew you're planning to dye your hair.” you admit, though it's stupid because of course you didn't know. You're not friends and there are so many things you don't know about him.

You both know that but luckily, Yoongi goes along with it and shoots you a brief smile.

“Yeah, it wasn't a plan. Just a spontaneous idea. My friend thought it's a good idea to do this at midnight.”

His friend?

Again, you don't know any of Yoongi's friends. All you heard is from Yeonseok and if you remember correctly, he called them 'a bunch of stoners' which you're not sure if it's accurate at all. Where would Yeonseok even see or meet his friends? It's most likely one of his judgy assumptions rather than a raw truth.

“Oh, the one I saw in your studio?”

What the hell?

Why would you say that?

Yoongi looks at you before he simply says; “Yeah.”

You know you have the look on your face. He sees it. He sees what you're assuming but he doesn't do anything to correct you.

Is he sleeping with her again? He did say they used to hook-up, that much you can remember. Actually, you can remember every single thing he said to you.

There's nothing holding him back now. He can do anything he wants to. So why do you feel… bitter about it?

You're the one married. You're the one who's pregnant.

Seeing him and being so close to him, there's something pulling you closer to him. Something that wants you to be in his close proximity. It's not love. You're sure of it. How can you love someone you barely know?

But the attraction you feel toward him is too much. It feels just the same as it did when you decided to end things. Nothing has changed and that scares you. You thought time would do you some favor but it turns out to be false.

“Hey,”

He snaps you out of your thoughts, your eyes blinking a few times as you find his dark glowing orbs.

“How are you doing?”

Something about his voice and the question itself is gentle. You're taken back for a moment.

“You mean besides pregnant and all emotional? Good.” you joke but Yoongi doesn't laugh nor chuckles how you expect him to.

Instead, he keeps staring at you until your smile slowly fades away.

“Is Yeonseok treating you right?”

“What kind of question is that?” you breathe out a chuckle, not hiding surprise.

“You seemed to be acting weird all evening. I don't remember you being this way.” he points out, voice hushed as if he told you a secret that nobody can hear which you don't understand, because you're alone outside.

Yeah, you're acting weird. For numerous reasons but he's the main one. Every single reason includes him but you can't tell him that. The baby you're carrying is biologically his. You made it through countless times of having sex, memories you can't seem to shake off. You no longer crave your husband's touch. You feel guilty every time he only touches you, and you don't mean anything intimate behind it. Whenever he would take your hand into his, you no longer feel the excitement and spark you once used to feel.

It's guilt and a need to pull away instead.

And you hate yourself for it. You're so mad at yourself that you want to scream into your pillow every night. But you put this imaginary mask on and you fall asleep with a smile on your face, letting your husband caress your still non-visible bump.

“I didn't expect you to come tonight. That's all.” you admit, not really lying but not telling him the raw truth either.

“What? You don't like seeing me?” he jokes this time, one corner of his lips lifting up and you swallow the urge to salivate at how good he looks doing bare minimum.

To be honest, you're not sure if you like to see him here. He just made your mind even a bigger mess than it already was without even knowing. He's completely clueless, going on with his life while you can't seem to forget about you two and what you've done.

“That's not it.” you laugh. It sounds a little forced though Yoongi doesn't react, maybe completely clueless about that too. “I'm glad you came.”

Okay, you weren't planning to say exactly that.

But it was worth it when you see the slightest glimpse of Yoongi's fond smile before he chuckles again.

“I'm sure your parents are glad too.”

You try to save it, though it makes Yoongi laugh even more.

“Yeah, not sure about that. Mom always sends me an invite over a text but I think she secretly hopes I never show up.”

You frown at the thought. The memory of her brushing off Yoongi's gift like it's nothing sudden comes to the surface. But you hope Yoongi is not right about this.

“I'm sure that's not true. Why would she hope about that?”

“I always bring some kind of drama.”

“You? The person who barely reacts?” you joke, laughing as Yoongi joins you though his life is nowhere near bubbly or equal as yours.

“They don't realize they're the drama.”

“Yeah, it's always like that…” you silently agree as the topic falls down a little and you end up staring at each other.

Heartbeat racing, you don't budge as you stare deeply into his eyes as he watches you with intense stare as well, which only adds to the sudden weird atmosphere and tension.

You open your mouth but you're interrupted by a door opening, soon spotting your husband as he looks around before his eyes set on you and his brother. He visibly tenses and without hesitance, makes his way to both of you. As soon as he's next to you, you feel his hand on your back as he sends daggers at Yoongi.

“What are you doing here?”

You're not sure who is he asking and you stare in bewilderment at how hostile he sounds. He could at least pretend to be nice. You don't like seeing him like this and you know it has everything to do with Yoongi.

“Are you asking me or…?” you chuckle almost nervously, but Yoongi doesn't budge.

He frowns at his brother as he scoffs, “Can't talk to my sister-in-law?”

You don't know what makes you want to throw up. Yoongi calling you sister-in-law or the bitter chuckle Yeonseok doesn't hide.

“Stay away from my wife.” Yeonseok spits and inches closer to Yoongi.

Eyes widening, you get between the two and subtly push Yeonseok. You ignore how he stares at you like you just betrayed him. You don't want to cause any scene, you want to avoid it as much as possible. At the moment you don't care who's right or not.

“Should've thought about it sooner.” But Yoongi only digs deeper, getting provoked by Yeonseok and this time you have to put much bigger pressure on Yeonseok's chest to not let him lash at Yoongi.

“Stop it,” you bark, not really sure who it's aimed at. Just one of them or both? “I came to talk to him.”

“And why would you do that?” Yeonseok frowns at you and you frown back, standing your ground as you scoff.

“Maybe because you've been glaring at him ever since he came? You're being impolite, Yeonseok. I just wanted to check on him.”

“That's not any of your business.”

Your mouth left agape, you're speechless but before you can react, Yoongi does it for you.

“Don't talk to her like that.” he warns and Yeonseok glares at him once again, but keeps his mouth shut because once he looks back at you, you see he realizes his mistake. He opens his mouth but you shake your head, silencing him.

“Wow,” he suddenly starts to laugh. You watch your husband turn into something you haven't seen yet, he looks almost insane yet he doesn't do anything big. He laughs sarcastically and bitterly, rubbing his forehead as he looks at you and Yoongi. “Look at that.”

“Yeonseok, stop it.” you snap, “Don't say something you'll regret later.”

His ironic smile fades, eyes boring into Yoongi who's standing behind you before he looks away with a clenched jaw.

Yoongi brushes past you and your husband, his intoxicating scent filling your nose for a quick moment as he makes his way inside. But he doesn't fully step in as he looks across his shoulder, eyes and words aimed at his brother. “Get your shit together.”

Yeonseok looks like he could punch a wall at the moment, but you don't entertain that idea, following Yoongi inside without looking back. He joins you, thinking twice about doing something stupid.

But by the time you're inside and joining your in-laws, Yoongi is already gone, leaving the rest of the family in a bitter mood because of his sudden departure. Only Yeonseok seems to be pissed off for a different reason. One, only the three of you know about.

Arriving back home helps to bring you some calmness to your sour mood. Yeonseok hasn't uttered a single word on your way back and so haven't you. What's the point? He seems to be upset and partly, you're the reason for it.

If you haven't decided to go to see Yoongi, all of this could've been avoided. Sure, in the end Yeonseok still couldn't help but glare at his brother at any given chance, but at least there would be no verbal confrontation. You know you just added fuel to the fire which wasn't completely helpful at all. But you couldn't help yourself.

You had to talk to Yoongi, as much as a part of you thought it was a dumb idea. You're confused and yet again, your thoughts are running wild that you don't pay any attention to your husband. Taking a longer shower, you replay your conversation until your headache approaches and even then, you see Yoongi's face in front of you. He occupies every corner of your mind and you breathe heavily to calm down your heartbeat.

This constant stress and hundreds of negative emotions you're feeling are not good for the baby. You wish you could just focus on yourself and the baby.

It's later on when you're scrolling through your social media, completely ignoring your husband as he's in and out of the shower, soon joining you in your bedroom. He stares at the ceiling, frowning at the plain color until he breaks the silence.

“Why would you go talk to him?”

It's the same question all over again, one you could answer easily but it would bring even more guilt and pain. Not just to you but to Yeonseok as well. You realize whatever you're dealing with alone, could potentially break everything you've been building with him. Sure, being honest seems like the best and healthiest option but you're a coward. You purposely try to push the real reason, not saying it out loud because you know the consequences it would have. You ignore it with every fiber of your body, well at least you try to do so.

Glancing at him, the pained expression on his face pains you even more. Yeonseok has expectations of you, some you understand and some you don't. But most importantly, you know you would act the same way if the roles were reversed. You know whatever Yeonseok feels, whether it's jealousy or betrayal, you would feel just the same.

It's already hard as it is – for both of you. You can't imagine being on Yeonseok's place. Your husband should never feel threatened by another man. And deep down you know that's how Yeonseok probably feels.

Sighing, you lock your phone and put it on your nightstand. “I told you. I just wanted to make sure he's fine. Everyone didn't seem happy to have him there.”

“What are you talking about?” Yeonseok frowns.

“Seok, come on…” you chuckle, “Your mother barely acknowledged him, so did your father. She ignored his gift, and didn't even bother to take a glance. I felt bad for him.”

You siding with Yoongi and partly having his back will only evoke another percentage of anger in Yeonseok. He's sensitive when it comes to his brother. You're growing quite sick of it. Maybe because you come from a broken family too. And it's not fair to Yoongi at all. Hearing his part of the story, you could relate to it even if your positions in your families are different.

Sure, he's not perfect either and often lets the temper get the best of him, but he's not at fault here. He's not as loved as Yeonseok is and the single thought makes your eyes water. You don't want your baby to feel they're unloved by one of the parents. You want them to be loved and have a great loving family. Somewhere they feel safe and loved.

“Since when do you care about this so much?”

The suspicion is evident in his voice and it makes your stomach clench uncomfortably.

“Just because I've been quiet this whole time, doesn't mean I don't see certain things Yeonseok.” you point out, realizing this is the first time you're having this kind of conversation.

You would often voice your confusion of how your in-laws speak about their younger son, but it would be often brushed off and Yeonseok would go on and off about how Yoongi doesn't deserve them, is an asshole and all the same old story. So naturally, you just let go of that topic because it wasn't worth any potential disagreements. After all, you barely knew Yoongi and everything you heard about him was from his parents and your husband.

You don't want to make it seem like because you had sex, now you suddenly know everything about him and you realize how your confession about tonight's dinner might sound like. You understand Yeonseok's suspicion and confusion, so do you the hidden annoyance laced in both his expression and voice.

But now you've seen a bigger picture, especially after talking to Yoongi. He sounded and looked vulnerable in his own style. You remember every minute of that conversation you held with him at his place.

At that time it didn't feel like he was your brother-in-law. At least you never really thought of him that way, hence the lack of his presence in your life. But back then, during the conversation, you never acknowledged it. He felt like… your friend.

You felt close to him.

Yeonseok looks speechless, betrayal showing on his face again but he can't expect you to agree with everything he says or does just because you're in a marriage.

“Is that all it is?”

Accusation clear in his tone, your mouth falls open as you stare at him wide-eyed, not believing your ears. “What are you initiating, Yeonseok?”

“I don't know, you tell me. You never bothered to discuss my brother before, at least not to this extent. I find it weird.” No, he finds it suspicious.

“Do you think I never noticed how you guys mistreat him?”

You wish you would keep your mouth shut as soon as you say it. Though it's true, the expression on your husband's face pains you. The last thing you want to do is fight. And any conversation about his brother means fighting. There's no other way. But he can't expect you to play a nice wife who constantly keeps her mouth shut. You're not like that at all. You've never been and he knows that. He knew about your every part when marrying you, even told you that's what made him fall in love with you.

But the topic named Yoongi would be often brushed off even if you might've said something that could potentially annoy or upset your husband. But he never lashed at you because of it, nor did he show so many negative emotions.

There is also a realization and you know why he's reacting like this. If you never had to intimately get closer to Yoongi, this wouldn't be happening. Yeonseok is sensitive and you get that.

“You can't be serious, Y/N.”

At the usage of your name, you feel like he's scolding you and his tone implicates that much. Frowning, you keep your mouth shut despite wanting to say something but you can't find the right words.

“Is this because you slept with him?”

“Oh my god!” you exclaim, sitting up straight before the anger causes you to get off the bed as Yeonseok stares at you with a lifted brow which angers you even more. “I can't believe you're bringing this up again.”

“You never cared for him, Y/N. Why would you go and seek his attention? You're pregnant and we're having a baby. You should focus on us.”

It feels like everything he's saying is wrong. And you get this urge to cry. Out of desperation and anger. But you swallow it down, staring in disbelief at your husband.

“I went to check on him, Yeonseok. You might not care about whatever relationship you have with him, but I don't like weirdness between me and other people. I felt bad so I went to talk to him. He literally congratulated us. It's not like we were doing something secretive behind your back.”

“Look at it from my point of view,” he starts, shaking his head. “My brother got you pregnant, you spent nights with him. Of course I'm going to get upset when you sneak out to see him.”

“For fuck sake, I didn't sneak out! I'm not some teenager that has to sneak out. I'm also an adult who's free and completely capable of making decisions on her own.” you frustratedly tell him.

“That's not what I meant.”

“No? Then what did you mean?”

There's a beat of silence spent with two of you staring at each other, the argument sitting heavily in the air as your bedroom starts to feel suffocating.

“Look, I understand your point of view. I should've told you I'm about to talk to him,”

You both know he would do anything to stop you.

And at the same time, you didn't think of it as a big deal. You thought you could somehow talk to Yoongi without any drama.

“It's not like I'm seeing him anymore. I just wanted to end everything on a good note.”

“You will be seeing him. He's your brother-in-law.”

You roll your eyes. “You know what I meant.”

Yoongi is not someone who hangs around his family too much. Something tells you you won't be seeing him anytime soon. Yeonseok knows that too.

“Let's not fight, okay?” he sighs, rubbing his eyes tiredly. “We both have different opinions about this but consider this argument done.”

“Is it really done? Because it doesn't feel like it.”

Yeonseok's expression saddens. “Yes. I'm sorry if I said something that hurt you. I didn't mean to initiate or suspect something.”

You're not sure if you truly believe his words.

But you're also exhausted by this fight.

“Now come lay in the bed, please. The stress is not good for you and the baby.”

Sighing and shifting on your spot, you join him in the bed. Though you stay on your side, slowly turning off the light as he does the same.

Yeonseok's jealousy could be justified. At the end, you did have sex with Yoongi and even if that was the agreement, it does make things harder. Even after it's over.

However, something tells you this is far from over. It's the beginning of something you can't name yet.

The first argument starts expectedly, at least that's how you would define it. Surprisingly, it hasn't happened right after the latest fiasco at Min's house. Yeonseok has been trying to be a good husband, happily ignoring the argument that involved his brother. Mostly busy with running the family's company, he tried to take you out whenever he could or just tried to spend more time with you. He hasn't missed any appointments you had, always beaming at the baby's scan with a widest smile.

But it was just a matter of time before things would go downhill and you know what exactly it would be.

Your husband has been needy, in ways you absolutely understand. Realizing his touch doesn't feel like it used to, you wouldn't let things get far other than simple caressing. Sex is natural in marriage and you had lot of it, even before you decided to start a family only to find out heartbreaking news.

Every time you would end any implication of lust or sex, he didn't comment on it but you could feel his stare and imagine the process of his thoughts. You would be frustrated too.

Actually you are. Mainly with yourself.

You can't give him what he craves for and the list of excuses gets thinner and thinner. It has gotten so thin that it raises even more suspicion and frustration on your husband's part. Do you blame him? Hell no. You're not sure you would be able to go months without intimacy, especially if your husband would give you a cold shoulder. Naturally, you would think there is a problem.

Now is there?

Yes. A big one.

How can you explain to your husband that you don't crave his touch? Just the thought of it makes you shudder in so much discomfort that it makes you sad. Fuck. You even thought about satisfying him with a single handjob or blowjob but you couldn't bring yourself to do it. It sounds twisted.

And sex is much more than just the idea to satisfying your needs. It has always been in your relationship. That's what differs between your marriage and the simple act of sex you had with Yoongi.

“This is getting ridiculous.”

It is. You agree with him.

Once again, you can't blame him for acting like this. He tried to be nice, asked if you're okay, if there's something wrong. But your answer would always be the same.

“I'm okay. I'm just not in the mood, must be the hormones. I'm sorry.”

Fuck. You know it's more than just some hormones. You barely know you're pregnant. Your pregnancy symptoms aren't showing anymore and anything extraordinary doesn't have to automatically scream “pregnancy” too.

But you often caress your small bump that's mostly visible in the evenings. Or maybe you're just bloated from all the snacks you eat before bedtime. Bonding with your unborn baby has been your current key to happiness. As much as you feel miserable and often lonely, despite having a loving husband next to you every night, whenever you would look down at your belly and think about what they will look like, who they would become, you suddenly don't feel alone at all.

No matter what happens, you have the baby. Your baby.

“Yeon–”

“No, I don't want to hear it. No more excuses, Y/N. I have been patient and you know that. I'm not someone who would ever force you to have sex, but you barely let me touch you and it's been months!”

You just finished eating dinner, one you prepared for him after he came back home from work. But now you feel like vomiting any second. No pregnancy symptoms though. Just your guilt and the fact that you know. You know that what he's saying is right.

Tears well up in your eyes. Nothing could make this right. There's nothing you could do to prevent this long awaited topic.

Yeonseok scans your face, noticing the sadness and vulnerability and his hands itching to get closer to you, to hold you tight and tell you everything's going to be fine. To tell you not to cry because it breaks his heart to see you crying. However, he knows this needs to be discussed and he can't continue to live in this marriage with zero answers. Or answers that sound nothing but lies.

“I'm sorry.”

Voice cracking, you stare at your husband in guilt and shame which makes it hard for him to look at you. He hates seeing you like this.

“No, Y/N.” he shakes his head, “Don't apologize but give me a proper answer. A reason. Is it your pregnancy? Do you not feel like having sex because of it? Or is there more to it? Maybe we should go to a couple's therapy or ask your doctor if it's normal. We can search for answers together.”

He's caring.

He's trying to find a solution meanwhile you mentally shake your head at everything he says. You don't need a doctor when you know exactly what's wrong. You know the exact reason (or more like reasons) why you don't want to have sex with your husband.

“No, it's not that.” you speak, voice weak and tired.

You're standing in the middle of your dining room, a kitchen island separating you from your husband as you're happy for this obstacle and distance at the moment.

“Then what is it?” he exclaims, trashing his arms in the air before they slap against his sides frustratedly. “Communication has never been a problem between us, Y/N. But now… I feel like I don't know you. You're different.”

He's being open, yet you feel your heart cracking as his words sound like an insult. Though that's crazy because he's nowhere near insulting you.

And when he goes on and on about not understanding you, saying the same words over and over again, something cracks in you with every word he says until you snap.

“Because I feel guilty!”

Admitting it out loud brings a beat of silence, Yeonseok's mouth shutting as he looks genuinely speechless.

“How can I have sex with my husband when I had sex with your brother?” Your voice cracks again, something changing in his expression before he frowns.

“I thought we were way past this.”

“Well, we aren't.” you bite back.

“So what? For the rest of our marriage and lives we won't have sex? Y/N, you knew what you were getting into. We agreed to it. You agreed to it! I was the last one who agreed to it, you told me you're okay, you said–”

“I know!” you yell, your hands slightly shaking as you grip the kitchen's counter for support. “I know.” you say more gently.

“I don't see any solution here, Y/N.”

He hasn't used your name so many times before. It only shows how angry and frustrated he is. Preferably frustrated at you.

“I didn't know I would feel this way, Yeonseok. How should I have known?” you raise your voice, voicing out your own frustration while his features don't soften. They turn even more stern.

“What exactly is your plan, then? Huh? We are married, Y/N. You can't expect me–”

“To wait?” you cut him off, “Is sex what you want? Let's go to the bedroom then. I will let you fuck me. Come on.”

You're frustrated, angry at yourself and you know this is not something you truly want. In the end, you know you wouldn't be able force yourself to have sex with him right now. Or anytime soon. You just can't. There is too much going on for you to do that. You wouldn't force yourself anyway.

As you make your way to him, in the midst of your sentence, Yeonseok shakes his head and holds his hands up. “Stop. You know I don't want that.”

“What do you want?” you ask, standing close to him as you stare into his tired face.

This is ruining both of you.

“I want us to be how we were.”

That single sentence makes you almost choke up, sobs wanting to get out of your mouth but you harshly bite the inside of your cheek.

“I don't know if that's possible. Not after everything.”

He opens his mouth but no words come out.

“I will sleep in the guest's room tonight. I think we both need to cool down to properly talk about this.”

You're escaping the confrontation again, you know that but you're physically and mentally exhausted. Thinking of the baby and yourself, you need to rest and take your mind off this. If that's possible.

“No.”

Yeonseok stops you with his voice booming in the room.

“I will take the guest room. You stay in the bedroom, the bed's bigger there.”

The bed in the guest room is large enough for two people, not mentioning it is for you alone. Both of you know that. Yet he still chose to let you sleep in your bedroom. It makes you even more sad now.

And he leaves, brushes past you as you two remain the most distant you've ever been. Your marriage and relationship is slowly but surely crumbling down.

It's safe to say you haven't slept well. As soon as the main exhaustion wore off, you were awake, tossing in the big and cold bed. Yeonseok kept his word and stayed in the guest room, which made you wonder if he's got trouble sleeping as well.

With having the whole night to think, even though it wasn't the right time to be thinking, you couldn't help yourself but consider every option you have. You couldn't help yourself but to think – if you never decided to go with the decision, you wouldn't be here and your marriage would go well. Maybe you and Yeonseok having kids wasn't planned for you. Maybe you should've lived the rest of your lives with no kids. Maybe after a while, Yeonseok would consider adoption.

But all of those are what if scenarios. No one knows if your marriage wouldn't suffer because of it later on.

You had those kinds of thoughts the whole night and by the time you woke up, it was almost lunchtime. Yeonseok was not at home, something you discovered after finally getting out of the room and walking around the apartment for a good half an hour. No sounds of anyone else being here were heard, so you went to check the guest room just to find it empty.

It's Saturday and Yeonseok has no work.

He wanted to take you out today, if you remember correctly. Not that you mind. After what happened yesterday, going somewhere out and acting like everything is fine is the least of the things you want to do.

When one of your friends calls you, you have to hold your tears back when she not only asks about you, but Yeonseok as well.

“Are you guys doing well?”

The single question makes you choke up on your sobs, she quickly understands there is something going on. So you tell her you don't want to talk about it right now. Luckily she understands and tries to take your mind off it. After an hour of talking and trying to laugh with her, the call ends and you're left alone all over again.

You've no idea what crosses your mind when you're trying to binge-watch the newest reality show, but you find yourself reading your old messages with Yoongi. Most of them are just dates and time, but hold a significant memory.

Even though you haven't slept well, you came up with the only solution you could find. With Yeonseok not being present, you weighed your decision and options. It's not going to be easy but you have this feeling you need to at least try.

He comes back around dinner time. Well, a little after that.

You expect him to come back wasted, or merrily drunk because you've never gone through this kind of situation and never had an argument this heavy. He's not the type to get drunk though, yet you expect him to do things most men would do.

However, he's completely sober when he joins you in the living room, barely giving you a glance before his eyes stop at you for a split second. You decide to speak first, judging by his stance he had no intention to speak at all.

“Can we talk?”

He bites back any bitter remark, simply staring at you before he offers a simple yet distant; “Okay.”

He doesn't sit nor join you on the couch, lingering at the end of it as he waits for you to speak. Mustering the right courage and ignoring your fastly beating heart, you lick your dry lips as you let out those painful words.

“We should take a break.”

Silence.

And then.

“What?” he breathes out.

“We should take a break.” you repeat.

He stares and then he sits on the edge of the couch, holding the arm rest for dear life as he looks shocked. And scared?

“What exactly do you mean by that? We are married, Y/N.”

“I know that,” you tell him slowly, looking at him a little sternly. Of course you know you're married. Does he think you're stupid? “And… we need a break. From everything. From each other. We both need to think.”

“Think?” He sounds shocked. “But you do plan to get back together, right?”

“I… don't know.” you tell him honestly. A break means many things.

But you both need to figure out where you stand and what you want to do with your marriage. You had a lot to think about. You're pregnant now. And to be a single mom sounds scary. But you can't be in a marriage that's not bringing you any joy. There are many issues you both have and you can't bring a baby into it. No matter how scary the thought of being a single mom is. For all you know, Yeonseok could easily kick you in the ass and say the kid is not his. You would end up divorced with a baby and no father near.

You're still not sure if this is the right decision, but you have to try.

“But we're expecting a baby. You really want to do this now?”

“And when? When not now?” you question him, frowning. “Don't think this is easy for me either. I'm the one who's pregnant Yeonseok. You could easily divorce me and leave me alone with the baby.”

“Why would I do that?”

Because you're not a biological father.

You can't say it. It's not fair to him. He is the father. You discussed it. Who cares about the biological side? But there's nothing stopping him from dropping his title of father. The baby is not born yet, no birth certificate has been done yet and won't be until the baby is here.

All you've got in him is trust that he wouldn't do it. Never in a million years you would've thought you would be in this position. Both of you.

“I don't know. I guess we need to figure that out. I just know I need some time alone.”

“Time alone for what?”

“To think,” you respond with a frown. “This is not easy for me either. But I can't be in a marriage where things don't work, Yeonseok. I know it's not your fault,”

It is not. He tried to be the best husband he could be.

“It's all on me. And for your sake, and mine, I need to do this.”

“Okay,” he says after a while. “So what now? Are we going to pretend we are roommates? I don't think I'm fully grasping your vision.”

“I'm gonna move out.”

Yeonseok starts choking on his spit as soon as you say it. “M-move out? Woah, that makes it even more serious and official. Where would you go?”

“I'm still working, partly but I am. I've got some saved-up money.”

“That's not right, Y/N. This apartment is ours. Your name is on it too.”

“I know, but I need to gather my thoughts and be alone.”

“Okay, then I'm moving out.”

“Seok, no.”

He frowns. “No. We have one small apartment in the city. I can stay there.”

You don't want him to be the one that moves out. You're the one who came up with the idea. It doesn't sound fair. Makes you feel like a bigger asshole.

“What does this mean? We're broken up? Are we together? Are we divorcing?”

You don't know.

“Let's just say we're broken up for now. We both need some time off. Some time to think.”

He stays silent before letting out a bitter chuckle. “I can't believe this.”

“Seok–”

“No. I gave you everything and you're leaving me.”

“We talked about this. I told you I need–”

“And what about what I need?!” he exclaims, standing up as you flinch. “I went to such lengths to keep this marriage perfect. I gave you everything I possibly could. I gave you house, luxury–”

“I never asked for any of that!” You stand up too, frowning at him. “And you know that. I never needed your luxury, Yeonseok. That's not why I married you or fell in love with you.”

“I know, yet I still decided to spoil you. Fuck, I even let my brother to fuck you!”

You're confused. He sounded broken and sad just a moment ago, almost as if he's trying to understand your decision but now, he's just angry and yelling at you.

“Please, don't bring that up.”

“Why not?” he snaps. “Isn't that right? You wanted him to fuck you. You agreed to it so we could start a family and now you're leaving me. Let's be honest Y/N,”

He sounds so distant. Like a stranger. Even his eyes darken and your heart squeezes painfully. So does your stomach.

“No one would take care of you like I do. We get divorced and then what? Co-parent? Or you're going to leave me and be a single mother? Nobody would ever want a single mother.”

Tears fall down your cheeks but he continues, staring at you without flinching as he spits out venom that slowly digs into every fiber of your body.

He just told you minutes ago that he wouldn't leave you alone with a baby. He made it clear he still wants to be a father no matter what. But considering everything he's spitting out, it's like he's trying to intimidate you.

Everything is a shock right now.

You stand there, crying and listening to him and his scenarios that are supposed to scare you. To show you what a good life you have with him. And for a second, you don't recognize him. You can't believe you married this man. But isn't this your fault? You've brought this inside him.

“Stop.” you whisper. “Just stop!” you scream.

He breathes heavily, glaring at you like you're the biggest enemy. You feel out of place. Like you don't belong here.

“Leave or I will.”

“You have nowhere to go.” he scoffs.

Your eyebrows shoot up before you turn around. No things with you, just your bag where you quickly toss your phone and wallet as you slip your shoes. Yeonseok is hot on your heels, doing nothing to stop you as you simply watch.

You take your things with you and slam the door shut. The door doesn't open but you don't linger around to wait for anything. Wiping the tears with the back of your hand, you rush to the car and bite back any tears that want to spill out. You need to get out of this place, drive safely so you don't harm yourself and the baby. And then you can cry all you want.

It was stupid of you to leave without any of your stuff. But it was the least of your worries and in the heat of the moment, you just had to get out of that place. Being there next to Yeonseok was suffocating. And the thought of it still is.

You park in front of a familiar building, its state not looking any better than you can remember. Who would've thought you would be back? Certainly not you.

But after sitting in your car that you parked in an empty parking lot in front of an already closed grocery store, Yeonseok words echoed in your mind.

You have nowhere to go.

It's not that true actually.

You could easily call one of your friends. But that would mean explaining them things and you want to avoid that right now. Plus, they would be the first thing on Yeonseok's mind if he were looking for you.

Will he? You're not sure.

You never had an argument like this and it's hard to say what he's going to do. But as of now, you want to be as far away from him as possible.

You thought not taking anything with you besides your wallet, phone and bag was stupid, but it's certainly not as stupid as you coming here. Why here out of all people? Why him?

He probably doesn't want anything to do with you, wants to distance from the drama as much as possible. Can you blame him? No. A part of you feels guilty for coming here. And nervous too. Is he even here?

Silently hoping he is, you make your way to the tattoo shop where its walls hold dozens of memories shared between you and him. But none of that is important right now. Before you can change your mind, you deliver a few soft knocks on the door.

There is no sound, no buzzing or chatter that could tell you there are people inside but the door looks like they can hold a sound or two. Much to your luck, the door opens shortly after and an unfamiliar face pops out of the door frame.

“Hello?”

He looks surprised to see you here, or maybe it's the weird expression you're holding that is somewhere looking like it's the end of the world between a massive need to cry your eyes out. However, you haven't cried yet so your eyes aren't watery nor red. You haven't seen yourself and you only hope you don't look as half bad as you feel.

But he still sends a bright smile your way. He does look kind of cute, definitely younger than you or Yoongi. Or maybe it's the blond hair and clear skin that make him look so youthful.

“How can I help you?” He offers a second after, relaxing a little as you catch a glimpse of the space behind him. You're surprised to see the place almost empty and an unsettling feeling grips your stomach.

“Hi,” you breathe out, “Is Yoongi here?”

“Ah, Yoongi is no longer working here. He moved out of this place, I'm renting it now.” he explains and you dryly gulp at the new information.

“Oh.”

The guy checks your face, tilting his head to the side for a moment as he studies your appearance.

“Um, but he gave me the address of his new tattoo shop. He might be there, if you wanna check?” he questions and your head snaps in his direction.

“Yeah, that would be awesome. Thanks.” you offer him a slight smile as he lifts his point finger in the air before he disappears inside.

He comes back not even a minute after, a yellow square paper in his hands as he gives you Yoongi's new address of his workplace.

“Umm, I should've asked sooner but you're not like, I don't know how to say this…”

You raise your brow at him.

“You're not… some psycho or something, right? He would kill me if he knew I just gave his address to someone.”

Chuckling, you open your mouth. “Chill. We are family.” you explain, not wanting him to worry. Technically you didn't lie, so there's nothing wrong with your response even though it does feel weird to say it.

It's Yeonseok connecting you two. Well, realistically there's also the baby but that doesn't exactly make you family.

The guy visibly breathes out a relieved sigh and luckily doesn't question you any further as you thank him for the last time, bidding a quick goodbye.

When you arrive at the scribbled address your navigation so kindly navigated you to, you park your car nearby on the opposite side of the road. You have to admit. This neighborhood and the building itself looks amazing, way more safer and in a better state. It's a complex of one big building with multiple shops. From a hair salon, some fast foods to a tattoo shop – which you hope that's where Yoongi is.

There's cool graffiti art on the wall of the mentioned tattoo shop, the name yet to be announced. You admire the art while you walk before you push the door inside. Like you expected, the place is spacious and there's an entryway. There's no chair or machines you walk right into, there's an actual reception and a bunch of boxes surrounding the place.

And you feel like an idiot for coming inside like some intruder, especially when there are people inside, chatting and laughing at the black reception table. Of course, they notice you right away and their heads are turned your direction in a split second.

You don't recognize any of them, at least not at first glance but that's before you recognize the woman from Yoongi's old shop. Yoongi's friend. Her hair is black and short now, a couple of new tattoos adoring her exposed thighs.

Her being here means Yoongi is around too. Or at least she could lead you to him.

But this hunt for Yoongi is starting to make you feel ridiculous. If he's not here, you will just have to figure out something on your own. Maybe you should sleep at a hotel or something, and not bother anyone else.

“Hi, sorry for barging in.” You even sound like an idiot.

However, the group looks curious about your presence, some of them shoot you a bright grin which eases down your nerves a little.

“Hey. You're Yoongi's sister-in-law, right?” The woman speaks up, her eyes scrunched for a second before they go back to their normal shape as she recognizes you.

“Yeah. Is he here?” you ask, shifting on your spot as you ignore the man eyeing you up and down with a little smirk.

He's got a few tattoos himself, the one on his neck catching your attention the most. However you don't let your eyes linger for too long.

“Yoongi, you've got a visitor!” She yells, tilting her head to the back where there's something that looks like a hall but it's too dark there to tell any more details. Even from where you're standing, they're mostly in your eyesight.

None of them make any sound, simply watching you and giving Yoongi's friend curious looks. Feeling a little bit awkward, you take the time to look around instead. There's nothing much to see. Boxes and unpacked stuff everywhere as everything smells of…. Novelty.

Following footsteps catch everyone's attention, including yours as he comes out of the dark hall, fully exposing himself to the bright lights of his new tattoo studio and a set of curious eyes. Eyes peeling off the floor to look at his friends, a look of annoyance and confusion crosses on his smooth face. Something about finally seeing him and being in the same room as him once again, makes your heart pick up the pace. You ascribe it to your nervosity and sudden regret of coming here.

“What?” he grumbles, silver hair slightly messy as his skin glows – or maybe it's sweat because he does seem to look a little tired. Judging by looking around, it seems like he's been working to get this place together.

His friend raises her brow and points your direction, all attention back to you while your eyes stay solely on Yoongi. You see it from the very beginning. From him frowning in confusion, staring at his friends before he follows the direction her finger is pointing at – you – until his eyes fall on your figure standing a few meters away from everyone.

His frown deepens before a look of surprise makes it onto his face while his mouth opens – very slightly – agape.

It's awkward. All of his friends – or whoever they are – are completely quiet, just watching you two like you're the most interesting part of the day.

“Hi,” you speak up, hugging your arms which totally reveals your uncertainty of coming here. Your usual collected and confident self is gone now, much to Yoongi's surprise. “Can we talk?”

“I don't know about our Yoongi, but you can talk to me anytime you want.” One of the guys says with a grin, his words causing you to send him an unappreciative glare. He obviously thinks it's a joke but you hate guys like that.

“Cut it out, Jimin,” Yoongi scolds him, sending him a second long glare before his eyes are back on you. “Come here. We can talk in the back.” Yoongi tells you and you get moving, not wanting his friends to stare at you any longer.

Do they know? Did Yoongi tell them? Is that why they stare at you as if you were an alien?

As soon as you get close to Yoongi, he motions to the back with his arm as the woody familiar scent of him surrounds the space around him. Yoongi sends a last glare to his friend or all of them – you don't know – before he leads you to the mentioned back. The hall is dark but not as dark as it appeared from where you were standing.

The back door is open and bright, revealing all the equipment a tattoo artist needs. There are empty boxes, some of them still unopened, lingering on the floor as he closes the door behind you. You look around, sensing the familiarity as Yoongi has stuck to his previous color and managed to have this place dark. But it doesn't look like some dungeon or creepy dark tattoo studio. Instead, it looks even more modern and chic – and you know it's going to look even better once it's all done. There is a long and wide mirror to be installed, leaning against the wall with a sheer bag on it protecting the glass.

But that's not why you came here. Therefore you don't look around for too long, turning around to Yoongi as soon as he closes the door and motions for you to sit down on a brand new couch. It's similar to the one he owned in his old studio. The only difference is that it's not black but light cream – however the leather looks comfortable and expensive.

Sitting down on the comfortable piece of furniture, Yoongi sits down on one of the chairs, sprawling his legs rather tiredly as he stretches his neck with a mild frown. “What are you doing here?”

He doesn't sound hostile but confused.

“I'm sorry. I didn't know where to go. I went to your old place but some guy told me you're no longer there, so he gave me this address. I hope that's okay.” you explain quickly, rubbing your knees as your palms get sweaty with each second.

“That's fine,” he assures you casually. “Did something happen?”

Staring at his brown eyes, you're only more confirmed what a stupid idea it was to come here. What's he got to do with your personal problems? He looks fucking confused, as he should. Probably wondering why you always keep coming back to him for some reason.

Yoongi might not know all of you, but he's not stupid or not observant enough to not notice when you're acting weird. When it's clear there's something wrong.

“Me and… your brother had an argument,” you start, staring at your knees. “I suggested we should take a break and well, he didn't exactly take it well.”

Yoongi leans forward, slowly and patiently as his frown deepens. “You broke up with him?”

“We are married. I don't think we can break up.” you try to joke, chuckling shakily as Yoongi's expression doesn't move which makes your grin drop.

“You know what I mean. Did he do something to you?” Yoongi asks, an awaited question finally spoken as his eyes quickly scans you from head to tone. He sounds unsure, not thinking his brother would be able to hurt anyone physically, especially his wife. But he still makes sure, it's a natural response.

“Apart from getting angry and telling me not so nice things, no. He wouldn't touch me like that.” you say, wincing at the thought of it.

Yoongi slowly nods, eyes never escaping you. “I don't understand… What happened then? Why would you want to take a break?”

“Because I can't be with him.” Your response is quick, mouth shutting right away as Yoongi's brows lift up.

Great…

“At least not right now. I just need some time to think. Our marriage and relationship is not what it used to be and it got me confused. I can't keep doing this to him and he expects things from me, which I understand but I also need to put myself first too, I can't suffer and everything got so fucking messy–”

“Hey, hey,” He butts in, leaning his head toward you as he makes sure you look at him. Once you do, he continues. “Breathe. Okay?”

Wow, easy to be said.

He wants to ask why you came to him? What's he got to do with your and his brother's issues? The questions sit on the tip of his tongue and he's ready to ask them, still straightforward as he is but then a silent sob leaves your mouth and he freezes, watching you shake your head.

“I'm sorry. I didn't know where else to go.” You repeat your previous words and he feels bad.

He's not great with handling other people's emotions, fuck, he's not the best person to comfort someone and most of the time he doesn't know what to say. This time it's not any different but it doesn't mean he's fine watching other people going through stuff. He's not as emotionless as people make him out to be – or as he often portrays himself to be.

“It's okay.”

“It's not,” You sob, finally breaking in tears. “You don't get it, Yoongi. One moment he said he's going to be the baby's father and then the next he almost hints at the possibility of me ending up alone. I don't want to be a single mom. I can't do this. I didn't go through this just for this to happen.”

You cry and Yoongi feels uncomfortable, not sure what to do as he listens to your cries and tries to make out your words.

Deep down, you know if you haven't said anything to Yeonseok and haven't proposed a break, none of this would happen. But your marriage and relationship would suffer in different ways. You're just trying to get this right, to deal with this somehow but it's fucking tough when you're all alone.

“How can he say that? He wanted to have kids too.”

He says kids in general. He avoids talking about the baby that's already growing inside your womb.

“He can't possibly leave you all alone to deal with… everything alone, right?”

You wipe your nose with your sleeve as you let out a bitter chuckle. You look at Yoongi, eyes and cheeks all wet and teary. “The baby hasn't been born yet. There are no documents signed. If he decides not to be the father, he can. DNA tests will prove he's not and I'm–” All alone. Sniffling, you stop yourself from saying.

“If he does that, he's an even bigger asshole than I thought he is.” Yoongi scoffs but you don't pay attention to those words too much, wiping your cheeks. “Do you, uh, want some water or something?”

You chuckle, shaking your head.

“I'm sure he just had a tough time dealing with the whole break thing. He loves you, Y/N. He always wanted to have kids. He is gonna come back.”

Is that what you want though?

“I don't know if that's what I want.”

“What?” Yoongi deadpans.

“I, like I told you, our marriage is not what it used to be.”

You don't want to get to the whole topic of you feeling guilty all over again. You know the last time you talked about it to Yoongi, or more precisely, the last time you decided to end things out of guilt, he didn't really take it well. Something tells you if you told him the whole truth, he wouldn't take it well either. What would you even tell him when you're confused yourself?

“Okay.” he says unsurely.

He leans back against the couch, letting a sigh escape his lips as you two sit in silence. It's awkward. He doesn't want to ask any more questions, thinking if you wanted to tell him you probably would. But one question that has already been asked still lingers in the air and after a moment of silently watching you, he can't help it but ask you again.

“Y/N, really, what are you doing here? I'm not kicking you out or anything but–is there a reason why you came to me?”

One thing is sure, you feel even worse after he says it and once he looks the horrification on your face, he opens his mouth again to justify.

“You got into a fight with my brother, you said you're taking a break. Did you pack some of your things with you? Where are you even going to stay?”

He hopes you didn't come here because of that.

The last thing Yoongi needs is for his brother to be knocking on his door or be involved any more than he already is. Just the fact you came here made him slightly involved and he doesn't like that. He was doing fine. His business is going good and finally, Yoongi is out of debts – thanks to the money Yeonseok gave him in a big exchange. He didn't do it for free though.

After you decided to break things off which ended up being a success for you too in the end, he thought he would never have to deal with this shit again. But here you are, cheeks stained with tears and in a state Yoongi would never imagine for you to be in.

“I had to leave in the middle of our fight. I didn't bring any stuff with me. I wasn't thinking…” You shake your head at your own stupidity while Yoongi gives you a pitiful look.

“Look, let me be straight with you. I wouldn't want to get involved in your personal problems with my brother. I'm glad I don't have to face him again and this thing we did–is way past us.” He tries to explain, mentally cringing how weird he sounds but he's only trying to voice out his thoughts.

You gape at him. A part of you understands him but the other is hurt how he doesn't care. Why would he? What did you expect of him? You know what… you expected him to be here for you, to maybe help you or assure you everything's going to be fine. Like a friend.

But you only realize he never was.

And you only hate yourself for it, because you made yourself to believe that in a way, he cared for you and wasn't so careless as Yeonseok pictured him – along with their parents.

“Don't worry, Yoongi. I'm planning to stay at a hotel.” You sound a little bitter but Yoongi doesn't comment on it.

The thing is, Yeonseok offered to move to another place but since you left in the middle of the argument, one that wouldn't probably end if you didn't leave, but right now you're not so sure. Is he still there? Where can you go grab your things? Are you even staying at your place or you will have to move out? Where will you go? You don't know anything.

It's a lot for your mind and body. You just want to be somewhere safe where you could possibly cry yourself to sleep.

“I just don't know what you want from me, Y/N.” Yoongi reminds you with an edge to his tone. “You can't come here and talk about being a single mom. What do you expect me to do, Y/N?”

You open your mouth, staring at him in disbelief.

“I don't expect you to do anything, Yoongi.” you bite back and he only scoffs.

“You and Yeonseok were willing to do anything to have this baby. You gotta figure it out.”

“I gotta figure it out.” you scoff under your breath.

“Yes, Y/N.”

God, you suddenly hate when he says your name. He sounds so stern and frustrated. He has never spoken to you like this.

“Or what did you expect me to do?”

You hate how accusing he suddenly sounds and it makes you frown as you look at him with a glare.

“I don't know what I expected but this was certainly not it. It was a mistake to come here.”

“I think you know.” He successfully ignores your remark but something tells you he definitely agrees with you. He doesn't want you here. Like he said, he doesn't want to get involved and that's a clue enough for you. But you stay glued to your place, ready for more throws from him.

“What?” you deadpan.

“Oh, come on. How more obvious can you get? Yeonseok starts talking shit about not being the father and you come to me,” he says firmly, suddenly standing up as his hand goes to his silver hair before he lets go. “I don't want kids, Y/N, I told you that. I'm not your kid's father.”

Every word he says is like a knife digging into your heart. Most importantly, you realize what he must be thinking. He questioned your motive for coming here and now he thinks you came here because you expected him to offer you god knows what. Apparently to take Yeonseok's place just in case he decides not to be a father after all.

He got it all wrong.

Your mistake and your own confusion has brought you into the mess. And Yoongi accusing you of something that's not even true hurts as fuck. And you could try to explain it to him but the truth is – his words hurt. They hurt so much that you can't bring yourself to explain anything.

However, his words are harsh regardless of how cold he sounds to be talking about a kid he helped to beget.

You stand up too, glaring at him through your teary eyes as you furiously wipe your cheeks.

“That's not why I came here at all. That's not what I want from you.” you tell him firmly despite your voice shaking.

“Really? Because–”

“You know what, fuck you.” You don't let him finish as you spring out of the room, not caring how harshly you open the door as you make it past his friends.

They stop in the midst of their conversation, not hanging around the reception table this time but unpacking some of the boxes as they stare at you while you storm out of the shop. Fuck Min Yoongi. Fuck all of them.

You've managed to dig yourself even a deeper hole with the Min brothers.

#networkbangtan #ksmutclub #btswritingcafe #ficswithluv #bts smut #yoongi x reader #yoongi smut #yoongi fanfic #bts fluff #bts angst #bts au #suga smut #personasintro

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soursvgar · 1 year

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Happy new years eve! Could you perhaps write something small about celebrating new years w the bros for the first time? What would they like to do on occasion? Eat fondue? Try making resolutions? Stay up to watch the first sunrise?

Maybe they don't even celebrate it because its kinda meaningless when your lifespan is so long lol

New Year's Eve with the brothers ♡

A/N: Hi anon, thank you for this prompt! This is really tiny, but i wanted to post it today to make it relevant so i hope you still like it!! ;v; ( i also just realized you said new year but i made it more new year's eve themed so i hope that's okay >< ) happy new year everyone!

Demon brothers x gender neutral mc

✧･ﾟ: *✧･ﾟ:*

ෆ Lucifer will get drunk and make a heartfelt confession.

"Maybe you should hold back on the demonus a bit-" You try to release the bottle from Lucifer's grip, but the latter was squeezing it a bit too tight for you to peel it off his fingers. You knew he was stressed, but didn't realize he was that stressed to finish an entire bottle of the intoxicating drink. Diavolo decided to throw a new year's eve party for you, and you recently found out he had put Lucifer in charge of organizing it. With his plate already full, you couldn't help feeling apologetic, despite you not being directly involved.

"Lucifer, I'm really sorry. If I knew of the party beforehand, I would've helped you with it." You decide to sit by him, hoping the light stroking of his arm will help convey your feelings. However, Lucifer only grins as he gazes at you, eyes shining with adoration. "Nonsense, you have nothing to be sorry for. I would do that all over again, for you." He puts down the bottle, now taking your hands in his. "You're the best thing that happened to me, to us. You've made this year worth more than all of my years in this realm combined, and I hope you'll stay by my side to make my next year just as happy."

ෆ Mammon will kiss you at the countdown.

"Ten, nine, ei-" Your counting is paused by a pair of lips pressing against yours, and doesn't resume for what seems to be longer than ten seconds. "Happy new year." Mammon smiles as he pulls away from you. "You know you're supposed to kiss me after the countdown, right?" You snicker, though, you have no complaints regarding his actions.

"I know, but I heard humans believe that if ya kiss your loved one at midnight, you'll be together for the rest of the year, so I was thinking- if I kiss ya before, during, and after, you would love me forever! Pretty smart, ain't it?"

ෆ Leviathan will create a vision board with you.

You had been intending to assemble a vision board for the new year for a while, but it slipped your mind with your busy schedule, only to return on the last day of the year. You came to Levi for help, partly because you knew you wouldn't be able to finish it in time alone, but mostly because you wanted to spend the night with him doing something fun together, and wasn't sure how to bring it up. The two of you were almost done carefully placing the pieces on the board when Levi lets out a sudden gasp.

"Wait, we forgot the most important part of the vision board!" Levi rummages through the scattered papers, pulling a picture of the two of you from the pile of photographs on the floor before he glues it right in the middle. "You have to have this on as well, so we can experience all those great moments next year together."

ෆ Satan will learn about different traditions for you.

"What color is the underwear you are wearing?" Satan asks, completely unaware of how his question comes off, at least until he catches a glimpse of your reddened cheeks. "O-Oh, I mean, I just read that some cultures in the human world believe that wearing different colors of underwear on new year's eve will bless you with luck in different aspects of life." He pauses to make sure you follow. "And... well, I wanted to see if you're wearing red- wait, I didn't mean see-" You chuckle as he clears his throat, his face is now the one turning pink. "Anyway, not like you need any more luck in that department when you have me."

ෆ Asmodeus will take you out to see fireworks.

"Where are we going? I told you I'm not joining one of your parties." You had already changed to a comfortable attire, planning to spend the last day of the year relaxing at home, but Asmo has other plans, insisting for you to come outside with him. "Pretty please? With a cherry on top? I promise you won't regret it!" He whines, grabbing the sleeve of your sweatshirt and pretending to be pulling you off the bed.

At last, you surrender, following Asmo to an open meadow with a remarkable view of the city. "Happy new year!" He beams when the clock strikes twelve; colorful lights illuminate the night skies as the sounds of explosions echo through them. "There are fireworks in the devildom?" You query. Captivated by the enthralling sight, you barely detect Asmo's arm wrapping around your shoulder to bring you closer. "There are now, for you, love."

ෆ Beelzebub will have a feast with all kinds of traditional food.

"Here, here! Try this!" Beel chimes, happily holding the chopsticks to your mouth. "Beel, I really can't eat anymore- I think you'll have to finish the rest on your own." You sigh. Truth is, you've been full after the seventh dish he had you sampling, but his enthusiasm was just too adorable to not cooperate with. "But these soba noodles are amazing, and you haven't even tried the lentils- it would bring you good fortune! Although, maybe you should hide that from Mammon." Beel shrugs as he continues stuffing his face.

"You know you could've just asked what food I eat during this time in the human world, right? You didn't have to cater food from every single country on earth." You laugh, finally stepping down from the tasting fest as you officially call quits.

"Hm? But where's the fun in that?"

ෆ Belphegor will fall asleep before the clock strikes twelve.

Belphegor really did try his best to fight the fatigue for a couple long hours while the two of you celebrated, but at the end, he succumbs to fatigue as his head falls perfectly on your shoulder- right before it hits midnight.

"Happy new y- oh, why are you looking at me like that?" Puzzled, Belphegor yawns, eyes glancing over to the clock after confronting your glare. "I missed it huh... I'm really sorry." He grins sheepishly, leaning in to place a peck to your pouting lips. "Well, are you still mad or can I get my new year's kiss now?"

#obey me #obey me shall we date #obey me lucifer #obey me mammon #obey me leviathan #obey me satan #obey me asmodeus #obey me beelzebub #obey me belphegor #obey me scenarios #obey me headcanons #obey me imagines #obey me mc

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ecoamerica · 2 months

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youtube

Watch the American Climate Leadership Awards 2024 now: https://youtu.be/bWiW4Rp8vF0?feature=shared

The American Climate Leadership Awards 2024 broadcast recording is now available on ecoAmerica's YouTube channel for viewers to be inspired by active climate leaders. Watch to find out which finalist received the $50,000 grand prize! Hosted by Vanessa Hauc and featuring Bill McKibben and Katharine Hayhoe!

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spaceyflowerswriting · 2 years

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make some headcanons with the boys leaning down to give their fem s/o a kiss on the cheek <3 and she holds his face and gives him a big smooch on the lips lmao thought it was cute.

Danny,Eli,Zack,Jake and Vasco pls you can take zack out if is too much. Thx!

lookism boys leaning down to give reader a kiss

details: fluffy headcanons, gender neutral reader but written in 2nd pov, reader has been dating character for a while

a/n: sure, anon!! its a very cute scenario <3 and i only write for genderneutral, please check request rules T_T

the headcanons kind of came out as mini scenarios themselves;; hope that still works for you !

daniel

> ever since you two started your date, he's been wanting to lean down and kiss your cheek as a dating milestone for him but his nervousness kept stopping him

> believe me, he's attempted like 5 times but whenever you turned his way he'd straighten back up and exclaim something like, "n-nice weather out today, huh?"

> eventually he gets the courage to towards the end of the date out of a last minute pressure

> it's a quick, shy peck and he backs away pretty fast. his initial reaction is to scream internally and then feel proud of himself before immediately apologizing to you if the kiss was bad

> you just smile and cup his cheeks, gently leading him back down to give him a loving kiss on the lips as reassurance <3 he melts into the kiss and becomes like a lovesick puppy!

> when you two part and he heads home, he's rolling around in his blanket thinking about how much he likes you and how he can't believe you like him, too <3

eli

> being one of the few (the only? lmao) men with actual romantic experience, kisses come much more naturally and casually to him

> simple kisses are an easy way for him to be physically affectionate, alongside holding your hand

> so, it's not uncommon for him to greet you with a kiss! especially if you two have been apart for a while. he'll stroll over to you and lean down to kiss your cheek.

> "i missed you."

> of course, you missed him, too, but today the feeling was just stronger than usual. before he straightens back up, you hold his face in place before giving him a smooch on the lips <3

> he's pleasantly surprised, but kisses you back, smiling into the kiss. when he pulls away, he cups your face back and adds an extra kiss on your forehead while chuckling~

zack

> the kiss came as a surprise to both of you honestly

> at a carnival date, you end up scoring a high score with one of the games and he leans down to smooch your cheek before pulling away to exclaim in joy

> it's only after his adrenaline sizzles away does he realize what he did. he tries to play it cool though, like it was totally planned

> it's easy for you see through the act though and you decide to grab a hold of his face and kiss him on the lips in a sort of teasing way <3

> despite his shock, he doesn't waste a second before kissing you right back. when you pull away, he's grinning like a lovesick fool

> "if i win you a prize at a different game, will you kiss me again?"

jake

> he's very playful so he's almost always leaning down, pretending he's about to do something important when all he does is give your cheek a quick kiss (and occasionally he runs off after lol)

> now was one of those times: except this time his tactic was saying, "hey, you're missing something here," while tapping on your cheek.

> as soon as you reply, "and what is that exactly?" he leans down to kiss where he tapped and replies, "my kiss," with a smirk.

> deciding to be playful back, you quip, "well, you're missing something on your lips, too," and hold his face to smooch him on the lips <3

> he holds back a laugh so you can have your moment while kissing you back with the same enthusiasm

> after pulling away from each other, he laughs and pulls you in a bit. "we could do this all day, you know~"

vasco

> if there's anything this man knows about romance, it's that kisses = good and he's full of love so he'll express that 100% ^_^

> always asks for your consent first !! like he excitedly runs over to you, already bending down a bit to be at the same level as you before asking, "can i kiss your cheek?"

> you nod and he smiles before leaning forward to smooch your cheek!

> much to his surprise though, you decide to keep him in place for a moment by cupping his cheeks and moving to kiss his lips <3

> when you pull away, he's so giddy he straight up picks you up into a hug and spins you around. when he sets you back down, he asks, "oh, yeah! can i kiss you back?"

> you say yes, of course, and he's kissing you back while cupping your cheeks~ may be squishing them though lol

#lookism x reader #daniel park x reader #eli jang x reader #zack lee x reader #jake kim x reader #vasco x reader #SORRY THIS TOOK SO LONG ;__;#ive been feeling like. my oneshot writing isnt good/feeling a lack of inspiration and that's affected my headcanons too #i really do hope these are fine 💔💔#requests

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1800-page-not-found · 6 months

Text

Another Lifetime | Gojo Satoru x Fem! Reader

I caught up with the manga and I think I'm going insane.

I was gonna make him a yandere but i switched up in the middle lol

ig i write for jujutsu kaisen now to yippie

Yall ever have those fucked up dreams of having a child or taking care of them only to wake up and realize your child doesn't exist, and will never exist?

If you do, then you can understand how Gojo acts in this story.

If you don't...just imagine how it feels to lose the closest person or animal to you, and for the entire world ignore the fact that you lost them and expects you to pretend they never existed in the first place. Something like that.

Something is wrong. Very wrong. You can feel it in your bones. Everything's the same, but different.

This... Gojo Satoru is not your Satoru.

What had happened that day? If only you were there to witness it. It was the first time you heard that the Gojo Satoru had fainted.

When he wakes up, he smiles, like his usual cheery self. But something's different. There's a hint of grief.

Everyone else seems to think he's fine. But perhaps its because they don't know him how you know him.

But now, do you even know him?

Day by day, he starts to stick less and less to his morals. He feels empty, a terrifying attribute for a man deemed the strongest. You just hope this Gojo Satoru will stay on the 'good' side.

Or maybe you never knew him at all.

Maybe, he held a facade, even in front of you. Maybe he was that broken this whole time. You wonder what happened that day.

But that's the past. Now...You wondered if you would survive today. It was no longer comforting, being alone with...Gojo was now a frightening experience.

"[name]." He smiled at you, yet it felt cold. Cruel. Evil.

"Yes, Gojo?" You answer back. He pauses.

"...You no longer call me Satoru." He is very close to you. It's suffocating.

"I thought you'd like to be called more formally." His smile drops. It's eerily silent, his eye pierce into you, seemingly tearing you apart until nothing is left.

"I see. Well! That's not what I really wanted to tell you!" And just like that, Gojo is happy. You can no longer tell if he means it or not.

"I escaped! That day-I was set free." He's spouting nonsense again. What does that mean?

"[name]." He grabs your wrist tightly. "are you afraid? Do you not like...the real me?"

The real him?

"Gojo, what nonsense are you spouting. Of course I like you." He smiles again.

"Just wanted to make sure. ⁱ ᵗʰⁱⁿᵏ ⁱ'ᵐ ᵍᵒⁱⁿᵍ ᶜʳᵃᶻʸ."

You exchange a few more sentences, and part ways. As you walk away, you can feel his eyes boring into your back, looking into your soul.

It's chilling. Gojo isn't smiling. Blood...Blood everywhere. Is this the day humanity ends?

"Gojo! What are you doing!?" You shout at him.

He turns around to face you. "Ah! [name]!" A smile that could only be perceived in nightmares appears on his face. "I got rid of them. They were going to hurt our family!"

You freeze.

He sees your reaction, and only grins in response.

"That day, I died. I really died. I couldn't use reversed curse technique. It was scary. 'How am I here then?' you might wonder."

He looks deranged, hysterical.

"It wasn't Jujutsu. A whole entire third world opened up." His face contorts to agony. "I lived a whole entire new life [name]! Free from curses, free from Jujutsu! We got married! We had a child, [name], a child! I was so happy-and, and-" He sounds crazy. He grips his hair, almost to the verge of pulling it out. "in a single moment-it all disappeared when I somehow came back to life."

--------

I...had a child? No, no, this is just him trying to get into your head!

--------

"It's not real."

"BUT IT IS, [NAME]. OUR DAUGHTER-SHE WAS REAL. ⁱ⁻ⁱ ʲᵘˢᵗ ʷᵃⁿᵗ ᵐʸ ᵇᵃᵇʸ ᵇᵃᶜᵏ…" He mumbles the last part. He crumbles to the ground, a sobbing mess.

This man...he is your Satoru. Just...broken.

But...if it's your Satoru, then you can accept it.

"Satoru..." You bend down. You're... crying.

He looks up at you, eyes red. "ʸᵒᵘ⁻ʸᵒᵘ ᶜᵃˡˡᵉᵈ ᵐᵉ ᵇʸ ᵐʸ ᶠⁱʳˢᵗ ⁿᵃᵐᵉ…" His voice is weak.

"I'm sorry." You pull him into a tight hug. "I'm sorry I couldn't accept you and comfort being at your lowest point."

The two of you hug for a long time, until Satoru pulls out a glass orb of sorts which glows a faint gold color. "Satoru?...What...What is this?"

"My baby...Our baby. I can bring her back, [name]."

But nothing's ever free in this cursed world.

"What price...must be paid?..."

He starts to sniffle, and breaks out into tears again. "I have to kill people [name]. I hate this. I hate this so much."

You pause. "How many?..."

"A thousand lives."

It honestly wasn't a hard decision. You hold your daughter's soul securely, then standing up.

"[n-name]?" Satoru looks up at you, wiping his tears away, just as yours start to pour.

"Satoru. From this day on, I will become a curse user. I'll take the blame. You have never hurt an innocent person, and I will have claimed a thousand lives. One day we'll meet again. Let me do this for you, please."

--------

It was terrible. Satoru knew that one day, your fate's would intertwine again. And on that day, you'd take your last breath.

"Under Jujutsu Regulations, t-the curse user known as [n-name]-he choked out a sob-[l. name] must be executed."

It was the first time after the day you left him, that he had cried again.

You didn't put up a fight. You smiled as blood poured out of your mouth. You held a piece of paper in your hand when you died.

It read:

I ᴅɪᴅ ɪᴛ, Sᴀᴛᴏʀᴜ. Fʀᴏᴍ ᴛʜᴇ ᴅᴀʏ ᴏᴜʀ ᴅᴀᴜɢʜᴛᴇʀ ᴡᴀs ʀᴇʙᴏʀɴ, I ʜᴀᴠᴇ ɢɪᴠᴇɴ ʜᴇʀ ᴜɴᴄᴏɴᴅɪᴛɪᴏɴᴀʟ ʟᴏᴠᴇ. [ᴅ. ɴᴀᴍᴇ] ɪs ᴀ ʟᴏᴠᴇʟʏ ɢɪʀʟ. I ᴋɴᴏᴡ ʏᴏᴜ'ʟʟ ᴛʀᴇᴀᴛ ʜᴇʀ ᴊᴜsᴛ ᴀs ᴡᴇʟʟ ᴀs ʏᴏᴜ ᴅɪᴅ ɪɴ ᴏᴜʀ ᴏᴛʜᴇʀ ʟɪꜰᴇᴛɪᴍᴇ.

I ᴏɴʟʏ ᴡɪsʜ I ᴡᴏᴜʟᴅ ʙᴇ ʜᴇʀᴇ ᴛᴏ ᴇxᴘᴇʀɪᴇɴᴄᴇ ɪᴛ ᴡɪᴛʜ ʏᴏᴜ.

Sᴛᴀʏ sᴛʀᴏɴɢ ꜰᴏʀ ᴏᴜʀ ʟɪᴛᴛʟᴇ ɢɪʀʟ. I ʟᴏᴠᴇ ʏᴏᴜ ʟᴏᴛs.

⁻Yᴏᴜʀ ᴏɴᴇ ᴀɴᴅ ᴏɴʟʏ [ɴᴀᴍᴇ].

He cried for hours, holding your dead body. You named her the same name you had given her in his other lifetime. He...never told you what you named her.

--------

"Daddy!" A girl shouts gleefully as she gets pushed forward on a swing.

"Wheeee! Isn't this fun, darling?" Satoru pushes his daughter carefully.

"Very! Hehe!" The little girl giggles.

--------

Satoru opened his eyes as he awakened on a grassy field. 'I fell asleep...where am I?' He looks around to see a faint figure on a hill, painting.

Walking closer, he sees, it's you. It's...you?... "[n-name]?"

He runs and hugs you so tight, you think you'd have died again from his hug.

"I can't stay long Satoru but... I wanted to check up on you. How is [d. name]?"

He smiled. "She's turning seven next month! She's also inherited your cursed technique."

"That's lovely. I'm so proud of you Satoru."

"Of course! I'm not the strongest sorcerer for nothing! It makes me the best father!"

You two talked for what seemed to be like an eternity.

"I have to go now, Satoru." You smiled softly.

"I know name. I love you. [l. name] [d. name.] loves you a lot too. She's never forgotten about you or what you look like, and I intend to keep it that way."

Your eyes widen in surprise. He gave her your last name.

"Goodbye. I love you, Satoru." You whispered as you faded away.

#angst #angst to comfort #jjk #jjk x reader #gojo x reader #satoru x reader #gojo satoru #gojo satoru x reader #satoru gojo x reader #jujutsu kaisen #jujutsu kaisen x reader #jujutsu kaisen x reader angst #satoru gojo

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xxsabitoxx · 1 year

Text

Promise Me

Giyu x Reader

Warning: this story contains angst

A/N: I said I was writing a Giyu angst…so here it is. I put the idea aside to finish my Kishibe fic and well… I wrote this in under an hour, I’m very tired and it isn’t proof read lol so if it’s shit… don’t tell me <3

Word Count: 2k

Sat on top of a grassy hill, light just barely filtering through to the ground, warm air cradling you in its embrace. You felt normal, for once in your life, you could finally rest without worry. “Strange… isn't it?” It was a quiet comment, as if your voice would shatter the illusion…even though it wasn’t an illusion to begin with. “Very much.” His voice was just as warm as the air surrounding you, so different than the one you were used to.

There was no reason for him to hide his emotions behind a sheet of thick ice, ice not even the toughest of picks had been able to break through. Mostly because they were never meant to, that ice was the kind only the sun itself could melt away. That was exactly what it did, removing every inch of the barrier he had built up over the first twenty one years of his life. “It almost feels like I’m dreaming.”

You watched the field below you, long grass swaying in the breeze. It looked inviting, like you could run through it for miles and never get tired. “Yeah… almost as if it’s too good to be true.” Giyu smiled softly, head tilting back to admire the brilliant hues of the setting sun. Painting the sky in an array of pinks and golds. Night was slowly creeping up on the two of you, yet it held no dread.

You no longer feared the setting sun, you welcomed the moon’s gentle embrace. There was nothing lurking within the shadows any longer, you’d forever be free from their grasp. “Me too, if this is a dream I hope it never ends.” You laughed softly, head tilting to admire the man beside you. Battered and bruised with so much left behind, so much that would never come back, you both emerged from the other side victorious.

“This just may be the longest dream I’ve ever experienced.” Your heart skipped, ever so slightly, as a smile crept up his face again. You weren’t used to it, you weren’t used to the warmth it radiated nor the brilliance it held when he smiled without restraint. The way his nose would scrunch softly, the way the corner of his eyes would crinkle. It only took an hour before you found yourself addicted to the look of it. “I rather like it here.” His gaze moved to meet yours.

For a moment, it felt as if time had stopped, as if the world stopped spinning on its axis for just that brief second. You couldn’t quite get over the man beside you, the man you now called your own. “Me too.” A gentle whisper, just as gentle as the breeze that carried it away from you. Everything about your life within the last two months was nothing short of new. A new beginning of sorts.

With that new beginning came new experiences. You’d never known a love like the one you shared now. It was delicate and young, you both had quite a lot to bear, to figure out. But this? It came naturally, no longer any barriers to keep you apart. There was no longer a reason to deny what was clearly there. Every day was a new opportunity, a new day to discover more about the other. Now, you couldn’t imagine your life without him.

You broke your gaze from his, a smile still present on your lips as you scooted closer to him, head coming to rest on his shoulder. “We should travel more, find every beautiful place we can.” Your fingers tangled in his, squeezing gently. “I’d like that. There is a whole world out there waiting for us. Now that we have the time to actually explore it.” His cheek pressed to the top of your head, eyes locked on the way your fingers intertwined with his.

“We could go anywhere we want. Take a boat across the ocean and discover what lies beyond it. Then, when we’re satisfied, once we’ve seen everything we could ever imagine, we return here.” You smiled, cheek squished to his shoulder. “We’d always have a home, so long as we’re together.” He teased softly, yet there was a weight to his words. “Tell me, Giyu…” you started softly, not wanting to pull away from him.

Yet you ached to see his face when you asked this question. “Yes? What is it?” His grip on your fingers tightened slightly, as if one gust of wind would pull you from him. “Are we going to spend the rest of our lives together? Just me and you?” You expected some sort of hesitation, some sort of silence that told you he was thinking about his answer. Instead, he replied without a second of hesitation. “If you’ll let me, I don’t ever intend on leaving your side.”

You pulled away, head lifting from his shoulder to look at him. “I’d never ask you to leave.” It was raw, maybe more serious than you intended for it to come out. Perhaps you only realized that because of the look in his eyes, blue eyes that held such surprise, such love. For a moment you found it hard to keep that gaze, as if the weight of his adoration would suffocate you if you tried to bear it all at once. “Good. Because you’d have a hell of a time keeping me away.”

A smile broke onto your face, one as brilliant as the setting sun behind you. One that made him pause for a moment, engraving each and every centimeter of your face into his memory. He never wanted to stop seeing the smile, he wanted to continue to be the reason you smiled in such a way. It was more intimate than any act of physical love in his book. A smile that was meant for him and him alone.

“I love you.” Slipped past his lips before he could pull it back, three words having a mind of their own as they tumbled helplessly out for you to hear. But maybe it was the words you uttered back that held more gravity, six words that pulled his heart in a million directions before snapping back into a whole. The kind of response he could only dream of getting, the response he didn’t quite feel he was deserving of. But that was something to be worked on.

“I know… I love you, too.”

You’d been aching to say it, quickly losing track of the amount of times where you nearly did. These were things that couldn’t be rushed. Now, you had all the time in the world to feel things out, cherish each moment and do things when the time felt right and not because the chance could get pulled out from under you. Now, though, saying ‘I love you’ now has never felt more right.

You shared a kiss, not your first, but one to remember. You’d engraved every bit of it to your memory. The way his lips felt against your own, soft and warm. The way he tasted, sweet like the honey from the pastry you had shared. The warmth between your bodies, the comfort of the other's presence. The sun fading to your backs, the sky lighting up with one last display of its brilliance before entering its slumber. Every moment of it was something to remember, hold on to and cherish.

Four years have passed since that day. Now, you sat on that very hill again. This time, you were alone. There was no longer a warmth cradling you in its embrace. The grass had long since died, the sky no longer held the brilliance it once did. It was cold, colder than sitting in the snow in the middle of winter with no layers.

Loneliness had never felt so crushing. As if the weight of it would drag you straight through the dirt below you and swallow you whole. Part of you wished it would. “You said I’d have one hell of a time keeping you away.” You laughed without any humor behind it, drawing your knees to your chest, the bark of the tree digging into your back. “You’re such a liar.”

You looked down, the stone was etched beautifully in perfect writing. His name front and center along with his dates. For some reason, it sent bubbling anger straight to your gut. Not anger at him, no you could never hold anything against him. It was physically impossible for you to ever feel badly towards him. No, this anger was directed at everything out of your control.

Just before his twenty-fifth birthday, he’d fallen ill. The kind of ill that you knew deep down you couldn’t come back from, the kind of sickness that pulled life out of you day by day…hour by hour. The kind of sickness that you could do nothing to treat, only try your hardest to make it comfortable. You had spent each and every day by his side, every waking moment holding his hand.

Remembering your travels, laughing about the adventures the two of you had shared. You’d meant every word that you said that day, you’d wanted to see the world. And Giyu did everything in his power to give that to you. You’d traveled to every beautiful place imaginable, even sailed across the ocean to discover the very lands you’d only ever dreamed of. He’d given you the entire world.

“I love you.” Just as gently as you had that day. Just as gently as you had whispered while he took his final breath. Just as gently as you spoke it every day you sat beside him on this hill. Your hand ached for the weight of his, fingers crying for the warmth of his tangled in your own. Crying to forget the coldness they had felt once he was gone, the warmth you’d never get back.

Thinking back on that day, you wish you had stared at him just a little longer, memorized the shade of blue that filled his irises. You wished you’d memorized the tone of his voice, the way his hair felt against your fingers, the soft blush of his skin. Even if you were granted all the time the world had to offer you, it would never be enough. There was no amount of time that would allow you to memorize him.

It was almost laughable, that three months without him felt longer than the four years you’d spent with him. Eventually you’d come to face the reality of your anger, that it wasn’t anger at all. The feelings you harbored were love, love in its purest form. In the end, that’s what grief really was. Love that you’d never be able to put forth, the kind that would forever hang on your shoulders and weigh you down. Always reminding you that it had nowhere to go.

“You’ll wait for me, won’t you? I promise I won’t be much longer.” Your eyes closed, inhaling the cool air through your nose. “It’s only a matter of time, it’ll catch up to me. My twenty-fifth is only a few months away. You’ll wait for me, right?” Your chest felt empty with each breath you took, nothing but an ache reminded you that you were still alive. It was infuriating to you, yet you couldn’t decipher why. Your mind is far too jumbled but unbearably silent at the same time.

“We can travel the world again. I’m not sure what lies beyond this, but I’m sure it’s far prettier than anything we ever saw. Maybe we can get married this time, when we’ll really have all the time in the world. We can enjoy each other with no time limit, for real this time. Giyu, promise me you’ll wait.” You knew no one was listening but that would never stop you from talking. When your death caught up to you, you’d die alone. But that didn’t scare you.

Not in the slightest. Because you knew he’d be there waiting, just as patiently as you had pleaded with him each time you sat beside his grave. Just as you had asked him, just as he promised you before his eyes shut, never to open again. Death was a warm hug, just as warm as the breeze had been that day. Just as warm as his hand had been intertwined with your own.

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fob4ever · 1 year

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patrick interview (iheartradio/mike jones) 2.28.23

link

[on people calling smfsd fob’s comeback] “i don’t think we went anywhere! we’ve been very very busy!”

he “very earnestly” loves smfsd a lot- it’s in the running for being his favorite fob album! and it means a lot to him that lftos was received so well.

“i have a day job! i score a children’s show” “you have a lot of day jobs actually!” “i have more than i need- its kindof overwhelming!”

“when you’re scoring, you’re sitting in a studio by yourself [...] and then i get plucked out of my studio and get put on a stage with fire and explosions and stuff- it feels very sudden and dramatic!”

“during mania i would go in the studio and take my voice and bend it [digitally] into completely different sounds [...] i was pretty satisfied with that experiment, it was fun”

“when we did records like ioh/fad, it was like [our] eyes were too big for [our] stomach- we had all these big ideas but we would go into the studio and have no idea what we were doing. we were still very green in terms of how to translate those ideas. now, all four of us have had so many experiences [in music] that we kinda know what we're doing and what we're talking about. and i was like, "man, if we could go back to that place, to that kind of studio, to working with neal avron [and] bring in these new experiences- what would that be like?" [it was about] bringing in these new influences and experiences into a studio and letting that sit. instead of having a specific sound we were going for, i just wanted to see what we all do now.”

he talks about wrigley and then does a sports announcer voice/impression

interviewer asks him if its daunting to have the whole year already planned out in terms of touring: “no, because i have very severe adhd so i almost forget that i am the same person in the future. i look at the calendar and i'm like, "oh, future patrick will deal with that! today patrick is doing this.”

he doesnt have a studio right now womp womppp. he’s inbetween studios atm. half the time he’s working at a desk in a hotel. he works off a little keyboard [as seen in the lftos bts vid] and then sends it off to an orchestra

patrick starts interviewing the interviewer lol “where’s the craziest place you’ve taken your radio show?”

he wrote the hulk rollercoaster theme imagining what he’d do if he got to score a hulk movie : )

universal has invited patrick to go ride the hulk rollercoaster but he doesnt like rollercoasters and is terrified of heights lol. during scoring, he scored it to a POV video of the ride but even then he still Felt it lmao

interviewer: “so no sports, no rollercoasters, but you do a great job at music so that’s all that matters!” patrick: “i’m kindof a one note guy. my one note is lots of notes!”

he wants to do a zelda score for nintendo! breath of the wild is his favorite game they’ve made, but one thing he misses about it is that its very quiet musically. he loves the ocarina of time soundtrack.

#beard.... :)#recap

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ecoamerica · 1 month

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youtube

Watch the 2024 American Climate Leadership Awards for High School Students now: https://youtu.be/5C-bb9PoRLc

The recording is now available on ecoAmerica's YouTube channel for viewers to be inspired by student climate leaders! Join Aishah-Nyeta Brown & Jerome Foster II and be inspired by student climate leaders as we recognize the High School Student finalists. Watch now to find out which student received the $25,000 grand prize and top recognition!

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