#it’s the perfect mix of chaos and order!!!! | Explore Tumblr Posts and Blogs

lucky-bucky-boy · 8 months

Text

Changing Tides

Paring: Bucky Barnes x Reader

Word Count: 6790

Summary: You and Bucky get paired together for undercover missions a lot because it works beautifully, despite the fact that you don't really even interact at home.

Warnings: 18+, unprotected sex, limited use of Y/N, LOTS of pet names (pretty girl, baby, i think baby girl, my girl etc), praise kink, oral f. receiving, slight angst, reader is in denial for a good bit of this, angst if you squint, reader is a part of the team, this piece takes place in an AU where everyone lives together and everything is happy

A/N: Oh. My. God. I did NOT intend for this to be this long, at one point I thought I was going to have to make this a two-parter but I got it all in here. I really enjoyed writing this, please let me know what y'all think!! :)))

I do not own these characters. Do NOT repost my writing and/or fics anywhere without my written permission. Reblogs are welcomed and highly appreciated!

Hues of velvety violet and radiant amber mixed, painting the evening sky like a scene out of a museum. The scent of warm sea salt was still palpable in the air, the crystal like water of the wide-expanding ocean reflected the light of the setting sun. Dancing specs of light could be seen in the darker shades of the sky, stars bright and clear against the inky color.

The cold metal of the hotel balcony pressed against your exposed skin, shirt having risen up as you leaned over it slightly. The view was beyond breathtaking, something you would argue belonged on a movie screen. It was serene, offering a moment of reprieve from the typical chaos you endured in a day, and a distraction from the man currently sitting in the hotel room behind you.

Hate didn’t describe the emotions you felt for the brunet. On a daily basis, there was an underlying disinterest but every now and then a seething annoyance would bubble at the mere thought of the former soldier. You couldn’t pin-point why. Bucky himself had never done anything to wrong you after his rehabilitation and reintroduction into society, and you could easily say nothing the Winter Soldier had done counted towards your feelings.

The odd part of it all is the Bucky and you worked well together, great even. More often than not, you found yourself partnered with Bucky on just about every mission the two of you had; from quick in and out missions to undercover operations like the one you were on now. The communication was great, the two of you easily fell into a rhythm and could read each other’s body language like you’ve known each other your whole life. It was easy to slip into a faux-domesticity with him, which was a stark contrast to the daily life you lived.

The day to day with Bucky involved a lack of any form of contact. You’d avoid the gym if he was in it, would eat in silence if the two of you happened to be in the kitchen at the same time, eye-contact was consistently avoided - Really, the only time the two of you were seen together at home was during group training sessions and team-building nights. You were sure to never make it awkward for the rest of the team, never bad mouth or be outwardly annoyed at Bucky’s presence, you just really couldn’t care less if he was there or not.

“Sweetheart,” his voice carried from the room, light and sweet, almost intoxicating with a feeling instantly having your gut turn and catch your skin aflame, “Did you want to go out for dinner tonight or just order room service?” His voice got nearer as he moved to join you on the balcony.The cool metal prosthetic wrapped around your waist as he stood next to you.

A soft hum left your lips, gaze moving from the horizon to the prosthetic then to Bucky’s face. He adorned a slight scruff, long hair pulled back into a low bun; His eyes nearly twinkled as they reflected the setting sky in the distance, he wore soft maroon button down and black chinos that truly made him look like a normal, well-off guy. Tony and Peter had finally managed to perfect the color needed to make Bucky prosthetic look like a normal arm which easily sealed the deal on assuring that there was nothing major that could be easily spotted to dox the two of you as agents.

The flight to Morocco was long and the next 10 days were easily going to be even longer, the last thing you wanted to do was be anywhere but a soft bed. “Room service,” you replied, matching the tone he had asked the question with. You leaned your head against his shoulder, moving your gaze back to the ocean, “Did you do a room check and get our things set up?”

He nodded, “Everything inside is clear and put away,” he squeezed your side softly when he said inside, a subtle emphasis to communicate where it was safe to not be in character. “I’ll go order the room service, you can go shower and get comfortable. I know how much you hate the airport.” He chuckled softly at the end, pressing a quick kiss to your hairline before making his way back inside.

You let out a soft sigh, making it inside as well and closing the balcony door behind you as you did. This really was going to be a long 10 days.

The bitter taste of the wine nearly made your mouth water, sitting somewhere between too intense and the perfect thing to take the edge off. The first full day had been smooth, an easy itinerary of walking and exploring the city. From the outside, the two of you easily looked like a love sick couple; matching clothes, a large diamond in your hand, Bucky always opening the door for you and your soft smile that just couldn't seem to leave you face; but in reality you had been mapping the city, learning the back alley ways and locating any ports that may be needed for a quick exit.

The small patio of the restaurant adorned a handful of tables, lanterns lighting the area in a soft romantic glow, lucious plants filling in any space, the open space allowed for ease of blending into the crowd while watching any passerby on the street. Bucky had taken up a game of footsie with you, chattering along about some of the shops you had passed along the way.

“Is there any shop you’d want to make your way back to?” Bucky took a sip of the wine in front of him, eyes fixed on you intently.

A soft hum left your lips, swaying your head back and forth softly as you thought. “Well, I wanna hit up the history and art museum, so maybe we could see if there’s any other cute shops there? If not, I’d definitely like to look at the jewelry store and bookstore we passed on the way here.”

“Mmm, I do think it’s time to get my pretty girl a new necklace,” the words fell off Bucky’s tongue like he sweet talked you on the daily.

There was that feeling again, the uneasiness that laid in the pit of your stomach and your skin heated up. Maybe this was why you couldn’t stand Bucky outside of missions, maybe you just didn’t want to deal with this feeling constantly. “You spoil me enough, ya know,” you offered a soft giggle, “I can assure you I don’t need any more jewelry, my love.”

Bucky smirked softly, cocking his eyebrows up at you with a knowing look on his face, “You may not need it, but that doesn’t mean I’m not going to do it anyways.”

You shook your head, about to offer a rebuttal as the waiter set your food down in front of you, all thoughts being lost to the amazing sights and smells. “This is easily my favorite part of our trips,” you stated, the distraction of food keeping you from noticing the way Bucky’s gaze stayed on you and a soft smile lingered.

Six days of being enveloped in Bucky’s presence, and thankfully it was getting easier by the moment. It had been a smooth operation so far, the information being easy to locate and gather without raising suspicions. As a result, Tony had said to take a day to relax, lay low and assure no one was able to realize there was something more to you two.

Bucky had made a home on the balcony of your hotel, a book in hand and a coffee sat on the little table next to him.He been there since the early morning and it was easily almost noon, not that that you were bothering to check the clock. A day off meant a day of sleep and eating, nothing much more than that.

However, sleeping wasn't something your body wanted to do so you found yourself with a forgotten movie playing on the television, your gaze consistently going back to him. You weren't sure why, but you couldn't keep your eyes off him. You'd been sitting for the past God knows how long trying to figure out why you couldn't pull your eyes away from him. His hair was down, something he didn't do quite often, almost always finding it easier to have it pulled away from his face. From the angle he was sitting, you could see his light gray button down was still completely unbuttoned, his jean shorts a little too snug around his thighs. He occasionally sipped the coffee that was most likely cold at this point, turning the page of the thick novel occasionally. His lips would purse, eyebrows scrunch occasionally, or a small chuckle, or even a shake of his head as he reacted to the words on the page.

The wind picked up some, indicating a small rain storm that was destined to his later in the evening was starting to make it's way in. Bucky pulled a hair tie from his pocket, tying his hair into his typical low bun before picking his book back up. And it finally hit you; Fuck he's pretty.

The thought immediately made your body heat up and the instant feeling of something in between shame and excitement sat low in your belly. It was like a well known secret your subconscious kept for years finally made it over the wall of denial in your brain, immediately making your thoughts run wild; Fuck he's so pretty, more than pretty actually. What if this is why we've been weird for some many years? Wait. Why would that make it weird? Wait. Why is it weird? Why do we get along so well on missions and then act so differently at home? Oh My God… Has the team been trying to set us up?

Shaking your head, you jumped up, apparently too suddenly because Bucky broke his concentration on his book to glance over at you. You could feel he was watching you move around, the only thought in your head now was to get out for some fresh air as you deciphered the flood of thoughts. You grabbed some fresh clothes, slipping into the bathroom with a heavy sigh once the door was closed.

You looked at yourself in the mirror, attempting to ground yourself. Okay, what the hell is going on? The question kept repeating itself over and over in your head as you slipped into a summer dress, a sage flowy piece that Natasha and you bought for this trip specifically. It was cute, and Nat was right when she said it complimented your skin; definitely different than your normal attire but still comfortable.

Walking out of the bathroom, you were relieved to find Bucky still where he was when you entered. After slipping on some sandals, you moved towards him, immediately aware of every detail of your very being. "Hey," you kept your voice soft, waiting for him to pull him eyes from the book and look up at you. There was something about how brightly his eyes shone with the golden sun beating down on him, there was a sense of both innocence and mystique, and the instant feeling of safety just from holding his gaze. "I'm heading out to get some coffee, do you want a fresh one? You've been sipping at the same cup for hours now."

Bucky glanced down at the cup, then to his watch, eyes going wide for a moment before a soft chuckle left his lips. "I've been out here for 4 hours already, shit. Yeah, I'd love a fresh one, doll. Thank you." He offered you a soft smile, "Just get me a-"

"A latte with three honeys on the side," you said matter-of-factly, "I could order for you at just about anywhere at this point." It was a teasing joke, one Bucky laughed at, but you instantly cursed yourself for even saying it.

"We do spend quite a bit of time together," he hummed out, "Did you want to go out for dinner or get room service tonight?" He asked, picking his book back up as he prepared for your departure.

"Let me see how I feel after I get back. But if we go out, it's your turn to pick. I picked last night." You stated before leaning down to kiss his hairline, still needing to keep up the act just in case someone was managing to spy; or at least that's what you were telling yourself. "I'll see you inna bit."

After returning with the coffee, still finding Bucky to be where he was when he left him, it was an instant decision to find a way to give yourself more time a way from the man that had your mind absolutely scrambled. Grabbing a book of your own, you let him know you'd be down by the pool if he needed you, using a quick excuse about wanting some change in scenery before the rain came as you left.

You weren't entirely sure how long you'd been out there, it couldn't have been too long, but you we're aware you were reading the same page over and over again. The words seemed to mix together, jumbling about and not registering even in the slightest, your brain still attempting to make sense of what you were feeling.

You never denied that Bucky was attractive, that's admittedly part of what made undercover missions easy. You never denied that you two got along well on missions, but you couldn't explain or pinpoint why you didn't get along at home. Sure, you were never hostile or rude, but it was exactly friendly or outgoing either. No matter how much you thought and walked through your early memories of Bucky, you couldn't make sense of anything.

At this point, you knew pride was part of the issue. You knew the team would be able to walk you through, at the very least Nat or Pepper or maybe even Steve, but you could never admit to them what you were currently feeling or going through. The only thing you wanted to do, needed to do was to act normal until you got home. Then you could just hide away and go back to not having to interact with the man that was causing you turmoil.

"There's my pretty girl," Bucky's drawl quickly pulled you out of your thoughts, causing you to jump at the sudden push back to reality. Seeing you jump caused Bucky to chuckle, especially as you turned to glare at him and his bright smile, "It's getting late, baby. We should go get some food."

He moved to the lounge chair you had made home in, kneeling down next to you so he was eye-level. There was that feeling again, low in the pit of your stomach that had your skin warming. "There's apparently food trucks at a park about not too far. Why don't we head there and get some food to bring back and watch a movie?"

Instinctively, you reach to tuck a strand of loose hair behind his ear, offering a soft nod and a smile, "That sounds perfect."

You wanted nothing more than to kiss him, the thought immediately making your already warm skin heat up more, feeling flustered and like a school girl. It's not like you haven't kissed, it was just agreed upon that it was reserved for dire need situations. All other physical touchs; hand holding, forehead kissing, even smacking each others ass was okay to sell the facade that you were a happy couple.

Bucky picked up on the change, a look of slight worry on his face, "You okay, doll?"

The laugh that left you was slightly anxious, holding the book in your hand up as a quick white lie, "Yeah, you just came down at a particularly… intense scene."

He immediately laughed, kissing your forehead as he stood up. "You're so cute. Let's get going though."

The bustling crowds offered a great distraction - Bucky stood proudly by your side, fingers interlocked together and swinging your joined hands softly like a love sick couple. The both of you scanned the crowd, trying to figure out where to go and what to get.

The lines weren't too long, there were nearly a dozen trucks, and live music playing. The sun was finally setting, more clouds rolling in and bringing in a cooler breeze that allowed for a reprieve from the beach heat. There were benches with umbrellas set up, lantern lights adorning some posts and wires around the lot. It was cute, and if it wasn't for the mission you were still technically on, it would feel so wrong to be here with Bucky.

After a moment of thought, you looked at Bucky, lips slightly pursed in thought, "I have an idea." You stated matter-of-factly.

He cooked an eyebrows at you, intrigued and slightly amused with your tone, "Let's hear it then."

"Let's get a platter or some random menu item from every truck then go back to the room and eat there."

Bucky looked around and nodded, "Ya know what, doll, that sounds fantastic. Do you wanna divide and conquer or go one by one?"

It was then that you realized the clouds were darkening, and the rain was definitely going to happen sooner than later. "Let's divide and conquer before the rain comes."

With a nod of agreement the two of you split, heading to either end of the trucks and working your way to each other. With the lines being shorter, it didn't take too long to get through them all, the both of you holding multiple bags stacked full of food and tied tightly. Quick words were exchanged before you started heading back towards the hotel, hoping to make it back before the rain.

The effort was fruitless though, with just maybe a few hundred feet left before the hotel you were staying at, the cold rain begins to pour down, the dark sky opening up and letting go every ounce of water it was holding on to. With loud gasps from the both of you, and small playful shriek even, you two took off running into the lobby, screeching yourselves to a stop as you entered and stood on the mats in front of the door. You were breathing heavily, attempting to catch your breath; a quick glance to Bucky showed you he was doing the same.

After a few moments, the two of you made eye contact, bursting into immediate laughter. You were both soaked head to toe, the only thing saved was the food. His shoes make a sloshing sound and your feet slid around in your sandals, you clothes clinging to every inch of your bodies. You were easily a sight for sore eyes, but it couldn't have been funnier.

"Why didn't either of us think about the rain?" You managed to get out through your laughter.

"Who knows, but let's get upstairs so we can get dry." He managed to respond.

The elevator ride up felt like an eternity, the cold of the AC feeling more intense from your wet skin. Bucky opened the door for you, letting you in first. He set the foot down, immediately kicking off his shoes. "Go shower, get warm. I'll pull out a change of clothes for you and we can swap when you're done."

Something about the direction made you freeze momentarily, causing him to look up at you, "(Y/N), you're freezing. Go shower. I'm fine to wait." His voice was soft and caring and there was a part of you that wanted to tell him to shower with you.

In the dim light of the room and the soaking wet clothes made him look even more divine, like he was sculpted from the gods themselves. You nodded, handing him the bags before making your way towards the bathroom. You closed the door, then quickly opening it to call out but he cut you off, "You want an oversized shirt and a loose pair of shorts, gets your ass in the shower." His tone was demanding but still playful. You caught the look in his eyes, mischievous, playful, and a hint of something you didn't want to recognize.

You kept your shower quick, ready to be in comfortable clothes and a bed with good food. After quickly drying yourself as much as possible, you wrapped yourself in a towel, and stepped out into the bedroom. Bucky stood in only his boxers, his own clothes in one hand while he scrolled through the television with the other. It wasn't the first time you've seen him with this little clothing, but something about it now made your mouth dry and your skin heat up.

"All yours," you said, grabbing his attention as you moved to the bed where he laid your clothes out for you.

"Thanks, doll. I'll be quick. You can pick the movie," he tossed the remote onto the bed before disappearing into the bathroom himself.

You stood there for a moment, taking a deep breath to calm yourself before slipping into the clean clothes. Bucky had already made work of getting creative. He pulled the ironing board from the closet and set the food up next to the bed, had fluffed the pillows up into a sitting position, and already gotten drinks for the two of you. By the time you had decided on a movie, Bucky was coming out of the bathroom.

Immediarely, you mind started short circuiting again. He looked soft. He had on a light blue shirt and a pair of light gray shorts, his hair was towel dried and brushed against his shoulders, a slight wave to the brown locks. He slid in bed next to you, getting himself situated and comfortable before handing over the massive spread of food for you to start digging into.

After about 20 minutes of eating and watching the movie in a comfortable silence, Bucky turned the volume down some, "Can I ask you a question?" The tone of his voice alone already told you how he was feeling. There was a sense of worry, anxiety almost to him.

"Of course, what's wrong?" You asked, sitting your food to the side so you could turn to look at him.

Bucky followed your lead, moving the food he had off the bed as well before taking a drink, trying to have a moment to articulate how he was going to ask what he wanted. Even though Bucky was sure the room wasn't bugged, he knew that there's was never a 100% chance of assuring that. The fact alone could make talking about things outside of the mission difficult, and this one one of those moments.

"How's the trip been for you? I know we haven't been on one in a while and I just want to make sure everything's okay, that we're okay." He had turned fully to look at you now, the worry in his voice making it to his eyes.

"Oh…" the response was immediate, and you regretted it instantly the second you so that worry on his face grow, "The trips been wonderful, and uh…" You sighed, toying with the blanket around you, "We're fine, yeah. I'm just… not here?" You said, sort of motioning to your head to get the point across.

Bucky cocked his head some, the worry turning to confusion. "Are we going to be okay when we go home?"

That was something you couldn't answer. What was okay. Was okay how you normally act? Was okay something different? Something better? Something worse?

"Uh… maybe?" You offered, immediately wincing at your own words. You sighed deeply, "I don't really know how to explain what I'm feeling."

"Okay," Bucky took a moment, letting you both sit in the uncomfortable silence that was the lull in the conversation. He was doing his best not to become frustrated, he knew there was most likely no easy way for you to communicate what you wanted to say or even what you were feeling, but he's been able to tell for the past couple of days that things, specifically that you, have been off. "What do you know?"

Your gaze met his again, taking a deep breath in to try to gather the courage to say what you needed. "Things feel… different?"

"Different?"

"Different."

Bucky stared at you for a moment, mind calculating and analyzing has he tried to decipher what you meant. In an instant it all clicked, and you didn't miss the way his lips curled into a quick smirk before his features soften. "Do things feel different when I call you my pretty girl?"

He watched as you immediately became flustered, averting your gaze and watching your chest rise and fall quicker. He thought he had sensed your heart rate quickening throughout the past couple of days, but he had honestly assumed it was anxiety from the mission. He had no reason to think it could be something else; Well, until now.

"(Y/N)," your name came as firm and demanding, causing you to look at him. The smirk on his face was more evident now, "We can continue this conversation now, or when we get home. But just remember, you're my favorite book to read."

You were instantly lost for words, mouth opening and closing as you processed what he just said to you. Waiting until you were home was going to be far too long, but talking about whatever this was now? Right now when you were flustered beyond belief, that flippant warm feeling filling every valley and curve of your body?

"Just say the word, doll, and I'll act like everything is normal. I'll go back to watching the movie and eating and ignoring the obivous."

A soft shake of your head was all you could muster as you search desperately for a will to stop the inevitable, or the courage to beg for it.

"Words, (Y/N). Use your words."

"I don't want normal." You swallowed, taking a shaky breath you continued, "I don't want this to go back to normal."

Buckys lips turned to a smile. "You don't want this to stop when we go home?"

You shook you head more feverishly, "No, I - Fuck, what have you done to me?" You groaned out.

"The same thing you've been doing to me for years, I suppose." His tone was matter-of-fact, cool and calm almost.

"What?" Your eyes had gone wide, mouth dry, and that God forsaken feeling low in your stomach was growing.

"You heard me. Obviously, we'll have some talking to do when we get home." He chuckled

Bucky moved as if he was going to grab the food, stopping once he heard, "No," come out of your mouth, "No. I want to talk about it now."

He looked back at you, eyebrows raising as to silently ask how.

"I want to…" You sighed, shaking your head in disbelief at yourself before leaning forward, cupping the back of his neck with your hand and pressing your lips to his.

This kiss was different; It was electricity filled, igniting every nerve in your body. You could feel the heat from your ears to your toes. It was intoxiting and addicting.

Bucky waisted no time in kissing you back, even letting out a small groan at your sudden assertiveness. His prosthetic hand held onto you waist, the other cupping your face as the two of you broke years worth of tension in one swift motion. Bucky pulled away first, taking in the plumpness of your kiss swollen lips, the sluttering of your lashes as your opened your eyes to look at him, and the darkness of your gaze that was stricken with last.

He looked just as enthralled, blue eyes dark as the night sky and hooded with desire, cheeks flushed slightly beneath his scruff. It finally clicked what the feeling you've been having all week was. Lust; pure, unadulterated lust for the man who was currently pretending to be your husband.

"Well damn, doll," he offered you a toothy grin, squeezing your waist, "Wasn't expecting that."

"Sorry-"

"Don't be." He bit his lip, studying your face for a moment, "Whatcha thinking, pretty girl?"

You couldn't help but get flustered, "That I want more. A lot fucking more." You hand moved up from his neck to card through his hair, his breath hitching some as you did. "Please, James, I need more." Your voice had a slight whine to it, something you hoped he wouldn't be able to resist.

"If I knew you sounded so pretty begging this would've happened years ago," he grumbled before kissing you again. This time though, he re-situated himself, helping you move to straddling him and doing his best to let you still have some semblance of control for now. His hands gripped your hips, keeping you from being able to move away from him.

One of your hands cupped his face, the other running down his clothed chest. You lips move in sink, a squeeze on your hips eliciting a small moan from you that he took advantage of, using your open mouth to slip his tongue in. You could feel the tent in his shorts growing, sitting hard against your core.

An experimental grind of your hips pulled a moan form the man beneath you; The sound was music to your ears, and enough encouragement to do it again.

Buckys hands moved, bracing you as he flipped you over to give himself more leverage and take control. Just as he begin to grind himself against you, he moved his lips from your to your neck. He kissed his way down to your pulse point, drinking in the sweet sounds you made. He sucked softly at the skin, moaned himself when you pulled at his hair.

Any rationale thought was gone at this point, any fears or anxieties you had pushed to the back of your mind as pure pleasure and desire took over the forefront of your thoughts. Once Bucky was sure he would be satisfied with the mark he left on you, he pulled back some to look you in the eye.

"Are you sure you want this?" He breathed out, offering you an out.

You nodded so quickly he couldn't help but laugh softly, "God, you look so fucking desperate, doll. You want me to fuck you?" He had a slight tease to his voice.

Another nod is all you could muster, but that wasn't good enough for him. "Uh uh, come on. Use your words. Need to hear you say it if you want me to do it."

You whined at his demand, pouting at him slightly, "Please."

"Please what?" His tone was more stern now, "If you want to continue, I need to know you actually want this."

His insistence to make sure you were consenting pulled at your heart strings. You nodded, "Yes, Bucky," you kept your voice soft before adding a slight whine and plea to it, "Please fuck me."

He smiled, kissing you much softer than had had before, "I'd do anything you asked me to." His words sounded like a promise that had you own emotions bubbling up.

Bucky leaned up for a moment, pulling off his shirt. He motioned for you to sit up and pulled yours off as well, groaning softly when he sat you skin. "Such a beautiful, pretty girl. Look at you," his hands ran up and down your sides and he took in your body before making eye contact with you again, "Most perfect thing I've ever seen, ya know that?"

He could feel your skin heat up at his comments, watching you squirm. "Take your shorts off, doll." Bucky moved off the bed, kneeling on the floor at the edge, "C'mere." He demanded.

You aren't going to deny him at this point, feeling yourself so tightly wrapped around his finger that you'd follow him into hell if it meant he kept talking to you like this. Once you were close enough, Bucky grabbed your thighs and pulled you to be perched on the edge on the bed, legs on his shoulders with his eyes level with your core.

"Look at this sweet little pussy," he squeezed your thighs tight, "You're fucking glistening, doll." He started pressing kisses to your thighs, avoiding the very apace you needed him at. "Smell fucking divine, I just know you're gonna taste even better."

Bucky watched as you already started fishing the sheets, squirming and biting you lip to hold back any noise. He already decided it was his job to make it impossible for you to hold back. Bucky moved his right hand to interlock with yours, taking his left arm and using it to put pressure on your waist, the cold feel of the prosthetic a stark contrast to the heat of your skin. Just as he squeezed your hand, Bucky licked a thick stripe from your core to your clit, genuinely moaning at the taste.

He wasted no time in drowning himself in your essence. Bucky licked and sucked, offering the occasional nibble, until you were grinding yourself in his face. Once soft gasps and moans were falling freely from you lips, he moved his left hand to your core, the cool digits of his forefinger and ringer figuring prodding your sopping hole. He wrapped his lips around your clit, sucking softly as he pushed two fingers in, relishing in the fact that your moans got loud.

Bucky pulled him mouth away, moving to you thighs and sucking hickies into the soft skin while his fingers worked magic. He already knew your body so well, years of working together on intimate missions allowed him to learn how to tell what you liked versus what you loved.

After leaving a few marks, he leaned his head against your thighs, looking up at you through his lashes and watching had your chest rose and fell and you head was thrown back in pure pleasure. "I was fucking right. Taste like honey, could drink you up all fucking day."

He licked a quick stripe again, from where his fingers were to the hilt inside you all the way to your clit. "So, here's what's going to happen. I'm going to continue eating your sweet little pussy until you cum all of face then I'm going to fuck you nice and deep so you feel my cock for days."

He chuckled when he felt your walls flutter around his fingers, "You like the sound of that, pretty girl?" He curled his fingers, hitting the spongy spot that had you gasping for air and eyes rolling into the back of your head. "Look, you're already so close to the edge. You better soak me, baby."

Bucky didn't fall short on his word, getting back to work on your clit with his mouth. His scruff added a nice sensation that bordered on pleasurable pain, fingers moving st the perfect pace and curving expertly, mouth switching between sucking and kitten licks. His right had squeezed your own hand, encouraging you to let go for him.

The pleasure was building quickly, it was intoxicating and inhibition destroying. You leaned up, using your free hand to grab hold of his hair and pull, giving you leverage to grind on his face. Bucky moaned against you, and truly giving you everything he was worth in his determination.

It didn't take much longer for you to fall over the edge, moaning loudly and body convulsing. Your legs squeezed his head as he continued to work you through your orgasm until you fell back, panting for breath.

Bucky pulled away, chuckling softly with a proud look in his face. From his nose down, he was absolutely glistening with your slick, "God you're fucking hot, using my face like that."

Bucky stood, pulling his shorts off, using them to wipe his face some, then tossing them to the side. "Can't wait to see your pretty face when I fill you up. Your gonna take me so good, aren't you?"

You nodded, already getting worked back up. You sat yourself up before he had the chance to grab you, leaning up and carding your hand through his hair again and guiding his lips to yours. You moaned at the taste of your own cum on his lips, reaching down to wrap your hand around his cock, jerking him slowly.

He pulled away from your lips, breathing in sharp. "Uh uh, doll, you can do that another time," he kissed your forehead, a sweet gesture that was a drastic difference to what was currently happening, "Right now, I wanna be buried inside you, making you cum all over me again. Cmon, lay back down for me."

You stole one more kiss before resuming your prior position. Bucky stood at the edge of the bed, pulling you back to the edge and holding your legs spread wide. "You can tell me to stop at any point," he said softly, "but unless you do that, I'm not stopping until you're thoroughly filled with me."

You nodded, offering a desperate, "Please, Bucky. Want all of you," and moving to hold your own legs up as the extra step to prove how much you wanted this.

"So fucking perfect," he groaned out. Bucky grabbed his length, teasing your slit a few times to get his thick tip left before finally pushing in. He was slow, listening to your gasp as he stretched you out so nicely.

Inch by inch, he pushed in until he was bent over you and all the way to the hilt, your lower bodies completely flushed. "You feel fucking amazing around me," he moaned out, kissing every inch of skin he could reach. Just as you were starting to whine, he pulled all the way out before slamming back in, causing you to moan out loudly when you felt him in the deepest parts of you.

Bucky set a brutal but rhythmic pace, changing it ever so slightly until he heard your moans and whines change to be deeper and louder. He moved one of your legs to his shoulder, which somehow allowed him to go even deeper, alternating between full thrusts and grinding against you.

He reached down between the two of you, rubbing circles in your clit with his thumb and watching as your whole body begin to shake with intense pleasure. "Look at you," he moaned out, "Better than my wildest dreams. You gonna cum again for me, already doll?"

He didn't need an answer at this point, he could tell from how your walls were squeezing him that you were close, and as much as he hated to admit it he wasn't far behind you. Bucky kept his movements consistent until he felt you fall over the edge again with a high pitch moan, his hips finally flattering as you squeezed him like a vice, quickly chasing his own high. A few erratic thrusts and he spilled into you with a moan of your name.

Bucky let your legs down, taking a few deep breaths before pulling out of you. He laughed lightly as you whined at the loss of him. He disappeared to the bathroom, cleaning himself up before bringing back a warm, damp wash cloth to wipe you down with. Bucky pressed softly kisses to yoh skin and he wiped you off, kissing your lips before tossing the cloth to the side and climbing into bed with you.

He helped you move back to laying normally in the bed, laughing once he noticed the credits of thie movie were rolling. He wrapped and arm around you, pulling you into his side and letting you get comfortable on him."How you feeling, doll?"

"Good, a little weird, but good." You said, voice drenched in exhaustion.

"Weird how?" He asked, rubbing his fingers up and down your back.

"Good weird. Happy things are gonna be different when we get home."

With how you were laying, you missed the way Bucky smiled down at you, "You don't understand how happy it makes me that I'll get to treat you like this all the time."

"Really?" You asked, already finding it hard to keep your eyes open.

"Doll, I've been yours since the moment I met you, someone was just too stubborn to notice her own feelings." He squeezed your side before going back to rubbing your back, "Get some sleep, we can talk in the morning."

#bucky barnes #marvel #seb stan #marvel smut #james buchanan barnes #bucky x reader #bucky barnes x reader #bucky smut #bucky barnes smut #bucky barnes fanfiction #marvel fan fiction #bucky barnes angst #bucky barnes fluff #james barnes #james barnes smut

2K notes · View notes

hd-junglebook · 1 month

Text

On Thin Ice

Part 1 - Word Count 1822

Part 2

Best Friends Brother/Forced Proximity

The pulsing bass of the music reverberated through the dimly lit club, bodies moved in rhythm on the crowded dance floor, bathed in the kaleidoscope of lights that flashed overhead.

At the center of it all stood Y/n, perched behind the sleek bar, expertly mixing drinks with a practiced hand.

Her eyes scanned the room with a cool detachment, taking in the eclectic mix of patrons who frequented the club night after night. Some were regulars, seeking refuge from the monotony of their daily lives, while others were newcomers drawn in by the promise of excitement and escape.

Among the throng of revelers, one figure stood out from the rest. Tall and confident, with a mischievous glint in his eye, was Jack Hughes, the famous hockey player whose presence seemed to command attention wherever he went. He was surrounded by his teammates, their laughter mingling with the music as they enjoyed the music.

Y/n watched them from afar, unimpressed by the spectacle they created. To her, they were just another group of entitled athletes looking for a good time.

But little did she know, Jack had already set his sights on her, intrigued by the challenge of winning over the one person in the club who seemed immune to his charms.

With a confident stride, she reaches their table and addresses the group with a professional smile. "Good evening, gentlemen. What can I get for you tonight?" she asks, her voice steady despite the loud music.

The other players eagerly place their orders, but Jack remains silent, his gaze fixed elsewhere as if she doesn't even exist. Y/n clears her throat, determined not to let his dismissive attitude get to her. Locking eyes with Jack, she holds his gaze, silently challenging him to acknowledge her presence.

After a moment, Jack finally meets her gaze, his expression guarded. Y/n holds his stare, refusing to back down. She leans in slightly, her voice dropping to a low murmur.

"Is there something I can help you with or are you just here to ignore me?" she says, her tone laced with a hint of sarcasm.

The other players begin cracking up amongst themselves, sensing the tension between Y/n and Jack. Jack's lips twitch with the hint of a smirk, intrigued by Y/n's defiance, not expecting her to address him so boldly.

"Surprise me," he finally replies, his voice low and husky.

Y/n raises an eyebrow, a smirk playing at the corners of her lips. "Alright then, consider it done," she says, before turning on her heel and heading back to the bar to prepare their drinks without a second glance. Y/n could hear them laughing even from behind the bar.

She steps behind the bar, the familiar rhythm of the club pulses through the wooden counter beneath her hands. She leans in, her movements fluid and practiced as she retrieves the necessary bottles from the shelves. The scent of alcohol and sweat mingles in the air, a constant backdrop to the cacophony of sound that fills the room.

With a steady hand, Y/n pours Jack's drink, the liquid flowing smoothly into the glass as she measures out the perfect amount.

Despite the chaos of the club around her, Y/n's movements are precise and deliberate, a testament to her few years of experience behind the bar. She knows this environment like the back of her hand, and she thrives in its fast-paced energy.

As she finishes pouring the drink, she takes a moment to savor the sense of calm that washes over her. Y/n approaches the table once again, carrying the tray of drinks, she can feel the weight of Jack's gaze on her.

She sets down the shots for the other players, exchanging friendly nods and smiles with them before finally reaching Jack.

With deliberate care, Y/n places Jack's drink in front of him, her fingers brushing against his hand for the briefest of moments. She meets his eyes, holding his gaze steadily as she waits for his reaction. Jack's expression softens slightly, a flicker of something unreadable crossing his features before he takes the shot glass in hand.

Their fingers brush again, this time lingering for a fraction of a second longer, sending a jolt of electricity through Y/n's veins.

"Thanks," Jack murmurs, his voice surprisingly gentle. With a simple nod, she returns to her duties behind the bar. She takes note of the two blondes leaning in close to each other, their heads bent together in whispered conversation.

They shoot furtive glances in the direction of the players' table, their giggles growing louder with each passing moment. Curiosity getting the better of her, Y/n approaches them with a quizzical smile.

"Everything alright, ladies? Need anything else?" she asks, her tone light but tinged with a hint of suspicion.

The blondes exchange a quick glance before one of them, a petite girl with a mischievous twinkle in her eye, speaks up. "Oh, we're just admiring the view," she says with a playful wink.

Y/n raises an eyebrow, her lips quirking into a half-smile. "Is that so? Well, I hear he has a thing for blondes," she replies, her voice tinged with amusement.

The girls look over at Jack, obviously trying to get his attention. This catches Jacks eye, and he quickly looks over at the two. Jack smiles a bit and then whispers something to his teammates. After he pulled away, they all began to laugh, he looked back at the drunk girls and smiles.

Y/n huffs out a laugh at the interaction before checking her watch, noting it was time to take her break. She headed straight to the more secluded area of the club, finding the lounge and plopping down on its couch. The soft hum of distant chatter fills the air, a soothing backdrop to her thoughts as she allows herself to unwind.

She takes the moment alone to relax in the quiet of the club before there’s a knock on the door frame. Y/n looks up to find Jack standing there, his grin wide and infectious as he meets her gaze. The sight of him catches her off guard, momentarily stealing her breath away.

With a playful twinkle in his eye, Jack saunters into the room with a casual confidence, closing the door behind him with a soft click. Y/n raises an eyebrow, her expression a mixture of amusement and skepticism as Jack enters the room. "Lost sweetheart?" she quips.

Jack chuckles, undeterred by her dismissive demeanor. "No, just looking for a moment to relax," he replies, his grin widening as he settles onto the couch beside her. Y/n rolls her eyes, her lips quirking into a half-smile despite herself.

"So, what's a girl like you doing in a place like this?" he asks, his tone playful as he tries to strike up a conversation.

Y/n scoffs, her eyes narrowing slightly as she sizes him up. "Working, if you must know," she replies, her tone clipped as she crosses her arms over her chest.

Jack's laughter fills the air, his eyes sparkling with amusement. "Ah, the glamorous life of a bartender," he says, his voice laced with mock sympathy. "I bet you see all kinds of interesting characters in here."

Y/n chuckles, her eyes dancing with amusement. "You have no idea," she replies, her tone light but tinged with a hint of sarcasm. "Let's just say, it's never boring."

But just as their banter begins to flow, the atmosphere in the room shifts. One of the blondes from earlier stumbles into the lounge, her presence immediately commanding attention.

She teeters unsteadily on her heels, her gaze fixed on Jack with single-minded determination. Y/n can feel the tension in the room shift, the easy rapport between her and Jack faltering in the face of this unexpected interruption.

The blonde sidles up to Jack, her movements clumsy and awkward as she tries to capture his attention. "Hey there, handsome," she slurs, her voice loud and grating in the quiet of the lounge. "Wanna dance?"

Jack's smile falters slightly at the intrusion, his eyes flickering with discomfort as he tries to navigate the situation. "Um, I'm sorry, I'm actually in the middle of something right now," he says, his voice strained as he tries to politely decline her offer.

But the blonde refuses to take no for an answer, her persistence bordering on desperation. She reaches out to touch Jack's arm, her voice growing louder as she tries to coax him into joining her on the dance floor.

Y/n can see the discomfort written plainly on his face. Without missing a beat, she leaps into action, determined to rescue him from the awkward situation. "Sorry, but Jack promised me the next dance," Y/n interjects smoothly.

Jack's eyes widen in surprise at the unexpected rescue, but he quickly recovers, shooting Y/n a grateful smile. "Yeah, sorry about that," he says, his tone apologetic as he stands up from the couch. "Duty calls, I guess."

With a quick nod to the bewildered blonde, Y/n and Jack make their escape, slipping out of the lounge without a backward glance. As they make their way through the club, Y/n can't help but chuckle at the absurdity of their excuse.

As they reach the crowded dance floor, Y/n suddenly becomes acutely aware of how close they are, the heat of Jack's presence sending a shiver down her spine. Clearing her throat awkwardly, Y/n takes a small step back, putting a safe distance between them.

"Well, that was... interesting," she says, her voice slightly strained as she tries to regain her composure. “I uhm need to get back to work.”

Jack's hand reaches out, gently catching her wrist and halting her in her tracks. She turns to face him, her gaze meeting his in the soft purple lights that cascade from above, casting a dreamlike glow over their exchange.

"Hey, before you go," Jack says, his voice smooth and confident. "I was wondering if I could get your number. You know, in case I need rescuing from any more blonde bombshells."

She quirks an eyebrow at his cheeky remark, a smirk playing at the corners of her lips. She tilts her head to the side, considering his request for a moment before responding.

"Well," she says, her tone teasing but tinged with a hint of approval. "I guess you're not gonna be my knight in shining armor after all." Jack chuckles, his smile widening at her playful jab. "I'll take that as a yes," he says, his voice tinged with relief as he reaches into his pocket for his phone.

But before he can enter her number, Y/n leans in close, her breath warm against his ear as she whispers, "It’s actually a no."

With a playful wink, she steps back, her heart pounding in her chest as she turns and walks away, leaving Jack standing there in the hallway, his mind reeling with the thrill of their encounter.

...

300 notes · View notes

waywardcrow · 3 months

Text

This is a request from @tianalsworld and I loved it so much! Hope you like it!

Pairing: Mob!Bucky x f!reader.

TW: Very light talk about the mob, sexual innuendos, suggestive comments, a little of angst and threaths from reader, no use of y/n, minors dni. English is not my first language so let me know if I make any grammar mistakes.

Graphics by @ firefly-graphics so all the credits to the creator.

“Hello, doll, you look astonishing today” you rolled your eyes at Bucky’s greeting, ignoring the jump your heart gave in your ribcage, you hated this man.

“Don’t call me doll, Barnes” you hissed, focused in getting the right amount of glass sugar in your mix “save that for the rich ladies attending your party tonight.”

Without giving him a glance you moved around your kitchen, the sun was barely up and your staff would not be there for another half an hour, still you couldn’t sleep. This was your first big event, you were working for a criminal family, yes but you were finally being recognized for your abilities, no longer shoved aside by stupid snobs who believed they were better than you for attending international schools and a manwhore like James Buchanan Barnes would not ruin this for you, no matter how hot he was.

“It’s jealousy what I hear?” he asked and got hit in the hand by you when he went to touch a hot tray.

“In your dreams, Barnes” his mother, the one who hired you, gave you full permission to deal with her son’s antics, knowing damn well his Casanova attitude.

“In my dreams you are sweeter with me, love”

“Well, in reality I have very sharp knives so go and bother someone else” you ordered and his laugh echoed in the empty fancy walls.

“Always making me smile, doll. Keep up with this and we’re going to end up married” Bucky stole a sugar cookie before you could react and walking backwards to the door, he blew you a kiss.

“When hell freezes over!” still, you didn’t believed a word.

Hours later, your kitchen was the complete opposite of what it was in the morning.

Chaos reigned everywhere but you controlled it, disappointing Winnifred Barnes wasn’t an option. Your hands ached, your feet were numb but the adrenaline running through your veins was enough to keep going shouting orders and prepping dishes, your brain going faster that your body and before you could notice, it was over.

The waiters were bringing everything back; the guests went home and your boss went to kiss you twice in the cheeks, beaming with happiness.

“It was perfect, dear, I knew since I saw you that you could do great things” Mrs. Barnes was like the classy ladies you used to see in magazines but she was always so nice to you, you couldn’t help but smile at her, happy for having her approval.

“I’m glad you liked it, Mrs. Barnes”

“I loved it but now, it’s time for you to rest a little, you earned it, we can talk about this and everything else in the morning” with a soft touch to your cheek, she left the kitchen, thanking the staff one more time.

You did the same minutes after, excusing yourself to go for some air you made your way to the garden.

It was only your first month in the Barnes mansion but it felt like a whole life, this could give you a lot of trouble but it was the best job you had so far and if you were totally honest with yourself, you were too enamored with the Barnes family to leave them.

Winnie was so sweet to you, so was the youngest daughter Rebecca and Mr. Barnes was always so polite, asking about your day and if you needed something, then there was Bucky.

The first time you saw him, you thought he was the most beautiful man you ever met and you still thought that way but being familiar with the endless list of women he slept with, it was the safest choice to stay away.

“There she is” Bucky’s voice broke through the night and then he was standing next to you “come, sweetheart, I have something for you.”

He pulled you by the hand and took you inside the house again with little effort, you were so tired.

“Barnes let go, I’m not going anywhere with you” making him stop you tried to pull your hand from his but he didn’t listened.

“Relax, doll, here is not where I go on my knees for you” the lack of food was playing with your mind, did he said what you heard he said?

He made you go in the balcony where a table was set with dishes of your food, candles and wine.

“What- what are you doing?” was your only question when he led you to your chair to pull it and help you take a seat.

“I figure you haven’t eaten all day so I picked your favorites” he explained like if he did this every day while pouring some wine for you.

It was true all your favorite foods were there, even the wine you were dying to try since you saw it in the mansion’s cellar.

“I mean, why are you doing this?” you asked taking a sip of your glass, it would hurt when he finally give up on you and go to the next conquer but it would be for the better.

“Because you take care of everyone here, I thought someone should take care of you for once” Bucky explained unfolding his napkin with something that looked like a nervous attitude but that wasn’t impossible, he was a fuckboy, a manwhore, the type of man that sleeps in a different bed every night and you were… you, there was no way you made him nervous.

“That’s very kind, Bucky” you admitted and his smile was shiny enough to dare the stars in the sky.

“Maybe this way you would see I’m a good guy and go out with me” he winked and maybe it was how tired you were or the wine but you laughed.

“When hell freezes over, Barnes.”

Here I am, obssesing over one more mob!Bucky and it feels great! Let me know what you think.

Love, Lily.

#bucky barnes x female reader #bucky barnes x reader #bucky barnes x y/n #bucky barnes x f!reader #bucky barnes fluff #mob!bucky barnes x reader #bucky barnes x you

311 notes · View notes

ratspaguetti · 29 days

Text

Smollusk is literally marina and pearls love child, and I want to see them in more comics completely gushing over their little ai baby, who will undoubtedly commit various warcrimes when it grows up (aka gets updates in which it slowly becomes more and more mature)

Smollusk being lawful evil is just the perfect mix of Chaos from Pearl and Order from Marina

#smollusk #splatoon #splatoon 3 #side order #marina and pearl #pearlina #marina #pearl houzuki #marina ida #rat rambles #order splatoon #pearl and marina but parents?? :0??#i love it

160 notes · View notes

whyanne4 · 9 months

Text

Memories

Pairing: Charles Leclerc x Verstappen! Reader

Part: 1/2

Category: angst

Summary: After months of sneaking around with your brothers biggest rival, Charles, you to end your relationship in order to protect both yourself and him from the medias praying eyes.

Right person, wrong situation. Loosely based on Conan Gray’s song: Memories. and Illicit affairs by Taylor Swift.

Masterlist

“Charles stop, we can't do this anymore.” You said as you felt the brunette slip his arms around your waist and kiss your neck gently. The warmth of his touch sent a shiver down your spine.

“Why not Y/N?” He whined into your neck.

“Charles I’m serious, stop. What if Max finds out?” You asked as you untangle yourself from his embrace.

“I don’t care.” Charles said defiantly, stepping back a bit.

"Well, I do. Max is my brother, and if he finds out about us, it'll ruin everything," you declared, stepping away and plopping down on the couch in his driver's room and in your mind all you could think of was all of the time you’d spent with Charles on that very same couch. How he’d kissed you and told you you were the most beautiful girl in the world.

You had met Charles through Max, your older brother and fellow F1 driver. The two of them were fierce rivals on the track. And you knew that if Max ever found out about your secret relationship with Charles, it would not only strain their relationship but also create chaos in the F1 media.

Last season, when you started attending more races and spending time with Max's team, you and Charles had found yourselves drawn to each other. It was effortless, like two pieces of a puzzle fitting perfectly together. You had tried to resist the temptation, knowing the potential consequences, but love has a way of breaking down walls.

The months that followed were filled with stolen glances, secret rendezvous, and stolen kisses. Every moment with Charles felt like a dream, and you knew that what you shared was special and rare. Everything was perfect. He was perfect, he still is but the fear of Max's reaction and the media scrutiny always lurked in the back of your mind.

You both had agreed to keep your relationship a secret, knowing that the repercussions of being discovered would be severe. But as time passed, it became harder to hide your feelings for each other. The thrill of the forbidden love mixed with the danger of being caught was intoxicating, but you knew it couldn't go on forever.

You know that it would be terrible for Charless image if the media found out. You were 4 years younger than him and you know that the people on twitter would be having a field day if your relationship ever got out.

So you never told anyone. Not Max, not your friends, nobody. Your relationship was a well kept secret. Sneaking out to see him at his apartment in Monaco or in his drivers room. Secret vacations to foreign countries. Hotel rooms under fake names. Think of anything forbidden and the two of you’ve done it. During those months of sneaking around both you and Charles fell hard for one another.

Those months were probably the best months of your life. He was the perfect guy for you and you hope that you were the perfect girl for him. The love you shared was something out of a fairytale and you knew that it was one for the ages. The kind of love only a few lucky ones get to experience during their lifetime.

But the reality of your situation was inescapable. You knew getting involved with him was a bad idea so you’d broken everything off three months ago. You knew it was the right decision. Trying to maintain your secret relationship would only lead to heartbreak and trouble.

Yet, the heart wants what it wants, and when you saw each other again for the first time since the split at this weekend's Grand Prix, he pulled you into his driver’s room like so many times before. You tried to resist, but your connection was too strong to ignore. One thing led to another and suddenly you were being pushed against a wall with his lips on yours before you came to your senses. Which leds to where you are right now:

“Y/N please listen to me.” Charles begged as he followed you and sat down on the couch beside you. You looked into his gorgeous emerald green eyes like you had a million times before.

“Charles, please don’t.” You tried with him but he wouldn’t let you finish.

“No! I don’t want to stop loving you. You are the one for me and I don’t want to spend my life with anyone else.” He confessed wholeheartedly. You felt the tears start to form in your eyes.

"Charles, please, we can't keep doing this," you said, tears forming in your eyes. "I love you, but we're only hurting ourselves by continuing like this. You knew getting into this that it wouldn’t last. However much I want to, we can never be.” You reasoned with him.

“I don’t care. Y/N you are the love of my life. We can make it work. We don’t have to tell anyone if that's what you want. Or we can tell everyone. Whatever you want.” He pleaded with you. “Or if you don’t want that I can quit F1 and we can run away together. We can get a secret house together in the countryside of France and start a family together or something, anything. I would give you everything I have in a heartbeat. Please just don’t give up on this Y/N. Don’t give up on us.” He started crying quietly and so did you.

“Charles, you know that wouldn’t work. Our families would find out eventually and so would the media. You will be bashed for dating me and your relationship with Max will be ruined.” You pleaded with him.

“I don't care. Y/N, you are the love of my life. We can make it work. We don't have to tell anyone if that's what you want. We can keep it a secret until the time is right,” he pleaded, holding her hand in his.

“Charles, it's not just about the secrecy. It's about our families, Max's feelings, and the media. It's about everything. As much as I love you, I can't put everyone else through that,” she said, her voice filled with sadness.

“So, you think what we had was nothing?” he was rightfully upset, but you didn’t know what else to tell him, he clearly wouldn’t go down without a fight.

“Please, Charles. This is hard enough as it is. Don’t make it harder than it already is okay. I know that one day you’ll find an amazing girl who will steal your heart and whom you will love 10 times more than me.” You put your hand on his cheek and felt his tears hit your thumb.

“That’s not possible, baby. I don’t want anyone else. We can make it work, please, you’re the one for me. I know it. I’ll never love anyone as much as I love you.” Charles pleaded.

“I love you too, Charles, so much.” You confessed to him. Even if you knew it wouldn’t help the situation at all. You felt the need to let him know that the feelings were not one sided. You loved this man with all your heart and if the circumstances were different, if you his rivals younger sister and if he wasn’t an F1 driver with the whole world watching his every move: You would probably get married, have a couple of kids and then grow old together. You would have the whole white picket-fence dream. But instead you were trapped in this situation and all you could do was try to let him go even if it was hard.

“See, you love me too. Y/N, I promise that things will work out.” He took your hand in his and caressed your palm gently with his thumb. His touch felt so familiar and you just wanted to let all your walls down and let him love you, let yourself love him. But you knew you couldn’t.

“Charles, as much as I want that, it’s just make-believe. It will never work out the way we want to and everyone will be hurt in the end, honey.” You felt the nickname slip from your lips before you could stop it. It was what you called him all throughout your secret rendezvous and the simple word held so much meaning for both of you.

“I know that, baby. I just don’t want to let you go. You’re my favorite person in the whole world. I don’t know how I will ever move on from you.” He seemed to finally give in and as much as it broke your heart you felt relief that he understood and didn’t argue more with you.

“I know it’s hard, honey. Which is why we can’t keep going back to each other from now on, okay? We can’t find an end to something that we keep beginning over and over again. From now on, I can’t be your friend or your lover, Charles. As much as it kills me inside I can’t hold you back from falling in love with somebody else.” You knew your words were harsh but you really needed to put an end to this here and now.

“I understand.” He put both of his hands on your cheeks and met your gaze. Both of your eyes were red from crying and held so many emotions and so much love for one another. “You’ll always be my person, no matter what happens or who I meet. If you ever change your mind I’ll be there for you with open arms no matter what. You’ll always have a piece of my heart Y/N. Please take care of it.”

“I will, I promise.” You vowed to him, your voice cracking as you tried to speak through your tears. “If things were different..” You tried to explain.

“Shh… Don’t worry about it, baby. You don’t have to explain.” He cut you off. “I’m not mad at you, I could never be mad at you.”

Silence followed as both of you gazed into each other's eyes, trying to savor your last moments together as a couple before all you had left were the memories of better times.

“Can I kiss you one last time?” He asked quietly as if he was afraid of shattering the moment.

“Yes.” Was all you could say before his lips met yours in one final, heart shattering kiss. Your tears mixed as they ran down both of your cheeks. His hands were still on your cheeks and you felt him pushing your face closer to his. You pulled away for air and he did the same.

“I’ll always love you, Charles.” You finally broke the silence.

“I’ll always love you too.” He said and you felt his soft hands leave your tear stained cheeks for the last time before he kissed your forehead and let go of you. You exited his driver’s room, heartbroken with only the memories of him left.

454 notes · View notes

avatar-anna · 1 year

Text

Love Games

summary: in which harry and y/n navigate having a secret relationship

young dad!harry, part of this / this universe

~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~

“Never have I ever had a song written about me.”

“Never have I ever made out with someone twice my age.”

“Never have I ever hooked up with a fan.”

With each prompt given, Harry was forced to give the answer that would best fit his image. Everyone laughed or cheered when he revealed that he had in fact done those things, which made the lunch Y/n had an hour earlier curdle in her stomach.

She knew it was all lies, that he’d never done any of those things—unless she counted as a fan—and that this was all part of his carefully curated popstar persona. The real truth was PR stunts and fake dates that made Harry seem a certain type of way to the general public. The truth was that Harry was that Harry wasn’t the womanizer everyone thought he was. The truth was he was the father of a two year old who he helped potty train and taught new words and sang lullabies to. Harry Styles wasn’t who he was portrayed to be, Y/n knew that, but something she couldn’t put a name to irritated her about the game, the questions, and Harry’s answers.

Because another truth was that Harry spent a lot of time on the road. He was handsome, talented, rich, and popular. And Y/n knew that even if those who wanted him knew about her and the daughter she and Harry had, they would still throw themselves at him. Who was to say that after an argument over the phone or if he was just feeling particularly lonely that he didn’t seek the comfort of someone else while she was home with Simone?

It was a terrible thing to think, but rumors about Harry being in a relationship with a model were running rampant the last few days. Rumors about Harry dating someone were always running rampant. Y/n normally didn’t give tabloids and gossip sites much thought, but for some reason it was all getting to her.

“Mumma? Hold you?”

Looking away from the hotel TV—because you couldn’t actually go to the live taping without raising suspicion—she mustered a smile for Simone. “Of course, love bug.”

Y/n swept Simone up into her arms and sat her on her lap. The two year old watched the screen, eyes never leaving it until the commercial break. She clapped and smiled and pointed, reaching her little arms out as if Harry could push through the screen and grab her.

“See Daddy now?” Simone asked, confused as to why she couldn’t see him anymore.

“Soon, baby,” Y/n responded.

And almost like he could sense them talking about him, Y/n’s phone pinged with a new message.

him <3: be back in twenty minutes!

Y/n knew it wasn’t his fault, and she knew that none of what he admitted to was true, but she couldn’t shake her doubts like she normally could. So she gave him a simple “ok” and turned her phone over. She looked down at Simone, who she could always rely on to cheer her up.

Her daughter’s face was the perfect mix of her and Harry. She had Y/n’s nose and Harry’s wide green eyes, her pouty lips and his deep dimples. She was too cute not to smile at, Y/n often found. Harry traveled the world, but hers was right here in her arms.

“How about some room service? You want chicken nuggets, bug?”

Simone nodded enthusiastically, and Y/n put the order in soon after.

When Harry came back to the hotel room, his bandmates followed, bringing all their usual noise and chaos. Some days Y/n would kick them out because she was trying to put Simone down for a nap, but the little one was still happily munching on cut up pieces of chicken, so she didn’t mind as much.

“Little Styles!”

Harry, Louis, Liam, and Niall all came into the room, crowding around Simone’s high chair. Simone smiled up at the boys, but it was her dad she reached for. He quickly took her out of the high chair so he could pick her up so the boys could play with her, and Y/n saw that as an opportunity to step away. She wasn’t sure if Harry knew she was upset, but she didn’t know if she could fake being fine either way. So while everyone fawned over Simone, Y/n slipped into the bathroom.

Her and Simone’s hotel room was standard—two full beds next to each other, one bath, a TV mounted on the wall, a small desk. Harry had a suite a few floors above them to not raise any questions as to why he would need a high chair or anything remotely baby related sent up to his room. As far as the hotel was concerned, Y/n and Simone were guests completely separate from Harry Styles and the rest of One Direction.

That notion squeezed Y/n’s heart uncomfortably too. She didn’t need to be in a suite or anything fancy like that, but she hated the way Harry’s management treated her and Simone. They couldn’t go to his shows, or they could, but Y/n couldn’t hold Simone so as not to raise suspicion about a young mother backstage at a One Direction concert. Any time spent together as a family was inside a hotel room—hers, never his. And absolutely no dates or staying the night.

Things hadn’t always been like this, but Harry explained that after Zayn left, the leash had been tightened on all the boys. There would be no room for error on anyone’s part, especially nothing as big as a baby scandal.

Y/n never said it to Harry, but sometimes she was selfishly grateful for the hiatus One Direction were taking soon. She didn’t want to announce to the world that she was Harry’s long-time girlfriend and mother of his two year old daughter, but she just didn’t want to feel suffocated like this anymore, or feel like there were people on Harry’s team who despised her and Simone for just existing.

Tears were on Y/n’s cheeks before she even realized it, the pinch of cold on the tracks they left behind being the only indication. She hastily wiped them away, knowing Harry or one of the boys would eventually notice her absence and come looking for her. Once she felt like she’d composed herself, she unlocked the bathroom door and stepped out. Liam, Louis and Niall were on their way to the door when she shuffled out of the bathroom, all of them awarding her with big hugs and warm smiles.

“You okay?” Louis asked quietly so no one but Y/n could hear him.

She nodded wordlessly, but he gave her a comforting squeeze on the shoulder and a tender smile before leaving the room with the other two boys. Of all the boys—besides Harry, of course—she’d become the closest to Louis.

The door clicked shut, and there was silence. Walking down the short hall, she reached the main space of the hotel room to find Simone back in her high chair and Harry feeding her. Y/n’s body filled with warmth at the sight, making her almost forget about all the things she’d felt the last couple hours.

She hadn’t made much noise, but Harry looked over to where she was standing. “Hey. Everything alright?”

“No, not really, but I don’t want to talk about it in front of her,” Y/n said with a smile.

“Do you want me to ask one of the boys to watch her while we talk in my room?”

She couldn’t keep the bite out of her voice as she replied, “I didn’t realize I was allowed to be in your room.”

Harry sighed and rubbed a tired hand over his face. He’d grown up so much since Y/n first met him, and yet he still looked so young. If she didn’t know him, she would never guess he was a dad, and she suspected Harry would say the same.

She wondered what life would’ve been like for the both of them if they’d never met, if they hadn’t been so careless one night. This life was difficult at times, and frustrating at others, but Y/n would put up with all of this again if it meant having Simone, but she did wonder.

“Of course you are,” Harry said, but he didn’t sound sure. Because the truth was he didn’t actually know if Y/n was allowed to be in his suite. Sometimes she thought Harry’s management worried that leaving the two of them alone for too long would result in another pregnancy, but no one ever said that was the reason, of course. “Y/n, can we please talk—”

“I—I think I just need some air. Can you watch her for a little?” she ended up saying.

Y/n could tell that Harry wanted to talk about whatever it was that was bothering her, but he didn’t try to stop her. “Yeah. Go ahead.”

“Text me if you need anything,” was all she said before she left.

:::::::::::::::::::::::::::::::::::::::::::::::::::::::::::::::::::::::::::::::::::::::::::::::::::

Harry knew he was in hot water, he just couldn’t pinpoint what it was.

The comment about being allowed into his hotel suite gave him a pretty good idea, but it seemed like it was more than that. He knew that Y/n put up with a lot, that being holed up with a two year old like this all the time wasn’t easy, but usually they were able to talk through their issues and come to a resolution together. But Y/n seemed so distant before she left. It made Harry incredibly nervous.

He loved Y/n with every fiber of his being. She was his best friend and greatest confidant, she supported him and cheered him on as he achieved so much, and was there for him whenever it all became too much. She was the first person he told about Zayn leaving, had listened to him rant and complain and try to make sense of one of his closest friends keeping such deep struggles a secret. She was everything to him, he just hoped she knew that.

“More please.”

Harry’s thundercloud of thoughts cleared for Simone, his mouth immediately forming a smile. “More?” he asked, pretending to be astounded. “You want more?”

Simone nodded, the curls on her forehead bouncing with the movement. Harry was going to cut up another piece of chicken for her anyway, but that smile would’ve sealed the deal.

When she was done eating, Harry took her out of the high chair and set her on the floor to play with some of her toys. He kept a watchful eye, knowing there was plenty of things in the hotel room a toddler could get into but shouldn’t. But she just sat on the floor and played with her plastic magnets, stacking them together and making new shapes. Harry sat with her, marveling at her creations when she showed them off and helping her build a tower just to knock them down.

Y/n found them sitting together when she came back to the room, feeling a little better than she had when she left. Harry didn’t say anything as she sat down next to him, though a wave of relief washed over him when she rested her head on his shoulder.

“Sometimes I just wish it was all over now and we didn’t have to deal with all of this, you know?” she breathed, watching Simone play with her toys.

“I’m sorry,” he said, knowing there wasn’t much else he could say. A lot of her stress was because of him.

Despite her best efforts, she sniffled. “I just hate the constant rumors and people thinking you’re available to be hit on or flirted with. And I know you would never cheat on me. I know that, but sometimes when it’s constantly in my face I can’t help but…” Y/n didn’t finish that thought, they both knew what she wasn’t saying. “And when it’s all over, I don’t even get the comfort of you holding me at night because—because—”

Harry did his best to hold her despite the angle they were sitting at. At first he was hurt at the implication that she thought he would ever cheat on her, but he wasn’t quite sure how he would handle everything if the roles were reversed. The fact that she was still here, still talking to him, meant more than words could describe.

“I—I’m yours, Y/n,” he said softly, but not without conviction. “Nothing matters to me more than what’s in this room. You and Simone have my heart.”

“I know,” she said, like she actually believed it. “It just feels like the world is against us sometimes.”

Harry knew “the world” was a stand-in for his management. They made their lives exponentially more difficult emotionally, but there wasn’t much he could do. Even during the hiatus, Harry would still be contracted with them, forced to play by their rules and hide Y/n and Simone away like they were something to be ashamed of.

“I’m gonna stay here tonight,” Harry finally said.

“Are you sure?” Y/n asked, knowing he’d get in a lot of trouble for risking exposure. Even if all management had to do was make people sign an NDA, they never wanted to take that chance. Y/n often supposed that their vigilance was something to appreciate, but she also thought their methods could be harsh.

“Yeah. I’ve missed having you in my arms too.”

She took her head off his shoulders then, their faces close enough that their noses were touching. Y/n nudged his with hers until he leaned in for a kiss. It was soft, nothing too intense while their two year old was playing right in front of them.

Later that night when Simone was fast asleep, Harry and Y/n stayed up, talking about everything and nothing. They both missed the intimacy of late night chats in bed, and though Harry had to be up early tomorrow morning, he made no attempts to go to sleep.

“Let’s go somewhere,” he whispered, thumbs caressing her bare shoulder.

He was talking like he could do whatever he wanted and go anywhere he wanted at the drop of a hat, but Y/n didn’t pop the bubble. She didn’t want to.

“Where?”

“I don’t know. Somewhere no one will find us. Somewhere no one knows who I am.”

“Might be a hard place to find,” she mused, playing with the rings on his finger.

She admired each one on his hand, pausing at the one on his ring finger. Her own was bare, there was no way they would ever be allowed to get engaged. But it was something she thought about amidst her busy life as a mom. Y/n often went back and forth between letting the world know that Harry was hers and hers only, as he’d promised, and keeping their love to themselves. Today was a shout it from the rooftops kind of day.

“I want it too,” Harry said, his eyes having tracked her gaze to where her bare finger lay tangled with his. They were young, sure, but they’d been through a lot together the last few years. He wanted her as badly as the day they first met, and if that wasn’t a sign that he was meant to be with her forever, he didn’t know what was.

Y/n turned so that she was facing him. Her eyes were heavy like they were fighting off sleep, but she kept them open. His long hair was splayed across the pillow, tangled from where her hands had rucked it up earlier. Harry, for whatever reason, had decided he wanted to grow it out. Y/n didn’t mind, though, she thought it made him even more irresistible. And the way Simone held a strand of it in her little fist whenever he held her was absolutely adorable.

“Want what?” she asked, even though she knew.

Harry leaned forward. Their lips touched, but he wouldn’t kiss her. Instead he mumbled, “To make you my wife. To let anyone who’s ever looked twice know that you have a husband.”

His words made her shiver. Harry’s jealousy didn’t show itself very often because they couldn’t be seen in public together. But he wasn’t an idiot. Y/n was breathtaking when they met, and she was even more so now. He could only imagine how many times people tried to flirt with her when he was away. Just the thought lit a spark of jealousy in him.

Y/n ran a hand through his hair. “Good to know we’re still wildly possessive of each other.”

Harry chuckled and kissed the spot just above her brow. “Always will be.”

She kissed him, leaving him no time to react before pushing her tongue past the seam of his lips. Harry groaned appreciatively, the low rumble making her toes curl. Y/n relished every movement, every stroke of his tongue against hers, each inch of her skin he claimed with his hand.

They were as quiet as they could be, aware of their daughter in her crib just a few paces away. A mouth on the shoulder to muffle, slow movements that didn’t have them breathing heavily but still sent them reeling, kisses that swallowed any noises that wanted to escape. By the end of it, they were littered with love bites and completely spent.

Y/n rested her head against Harry’s chest, her hand resting on his stomach as her thumb caressed the soft skin there. He worked out quite often and was in great shape, but she loved that he had a little bit of a belly.

“What would the world think if they knew Harry Styles had a dad bod?” Y/n murmured, giving him a soft pinch.

“Hey,” Harry replied, but wasn’t actually offended. “You love this body.”

“I do.”

Tipping her head up, she kissed him, sighing against the comfortable slide of his lips against hers. She was about to rest her head back on his chest when there was movement from the crib and a soft cry.

Shimmying into a pair of pants, Harry went over to the crib and picked up Simone. “Just this once,” he said, laying her down between him and Y/n, who didn’t hesitate to take her into her arms. In seconds, Simone was fast asleep, her cheek squished up against Y/n’s shoulder.

“Perfect,” she heard Harry whisper before his arm snaked over Y/n’s waist. Simone’s hand subconsciously reached for Harry, latching onto his hair. He kissed her cheek once before resting his head on his pillow once more before falling asleep, savoring the peace he felt of sleeping with his family in his arms.

#harry styles #harry styles blurb #harry styles x reader #harry styles fanfic #harry styles imagine #harry styles oneshot #harry styles fanfiction #harry styles x you #harry styles fluff #harry styles writing #harry styles one shot #harry styles fic #harry styles angst

1K notes · View notes

thewertsearch · 16 days

Text

Let's kick things off with a mega-giga ask compilation!

I've spent the last couple of days working through the backlog, and I've been able to answer some quite old asks that were spoilers at the time they were sent.

@kintatsu asked: So, I was rereading your blog, and got to the post where you determine that John's 13th birthday was a Monday, and complain on his behalf that he couldn't really relax due to having the whole schoolweek ahead of him. Well, I checked, and the previous day was the first Sunday after the first full moon after the equinox, i.e. Easter Sunday. So it might have been a holiday week.

John entered the Medium shortly after Easter Sunday, and he did so by biting into an apple. Forget about the god tiers – his most powerful transformation is clearly Catholic Beast Mode.

Anonymous asked: The thing about knowing your Aspect, I think, is that it's the Aspect you most GET. I GET Space and Light, I understand them completely, they are suffused in my bones and my blood, they are writ large upon my brain and every base in my DNA. What aspect do you just GET?

To be honest, I don’t think I know enough about any Aspect to ‘get’ it.

If I had to choose, then I'd probably feel the most natural affinity for Life and/or Doom – and if was forced to pick one, I’d say I'm very slightly more drawn to Life, just based on vibes.

@mhafanlol2000 asked: I think the horrorterror’s plan (or the closest thing we can comprehend) is CHAOS-by which I mean LIFE. Skaia is order. If it can want, then it wants its players to follow the script it has written-the Alpha. It wants propagation, the snake to eat it’s own tail, blah blah blah. That is order. That is perfect servitude. That is NOT life. The gods, meanwhile, want chaos. It wants its servants to live. It does not tell people to do anything. It simply gives them the facts, and says “here is what you should do. You can not, you can do whatever the hell.” It wants romance, conflict, CHAOS. that is life.

And if this theory is accurate to the canon Life aspect, then I feel justified in my affinity for it. It falls fairly closely in line with my own philosophy.

@necrowyrm asked: When searching your blog I always type "thew" before Tumblr autocompletes your URL. That has become who you are to me.. Thew, Glorious Liveblogger, navigating the treacherous seas of Homestuck

Sally ‘Thew’ Ertsearch, reporting in. 🫡

Anonymous asked: there's actually another arthurian joke to do with dave's land/quest. have another look at the disc platform that bro stabbed. how would you describe the shape of that turntable?

Ayy, Dave's a Knight of the Round Turntable! Honestly, that'd be a pretty great name for his theme song.

@caliquill asked: kanaya vs rose would be absolutely hilarious but. kanaya IS the original "I Can Fix Her" girl for a reason.

Anonymous asked: the only real requirement for a name suggestion to be picked was that the firstname was 4 letters. but by really cool coincidence strider and lalonde are 7 letters, and egbert and harley are 6, and if you add those together its 4/13! similarly, both the trolls names were required to be 6 letters (i think hussie mixed and matched them actually, some of the firstnames were suggested as surnames and vice versa) so theres a similar case to be made for 6/12. but just doubling the same number i think holds less water than adding together two different numbers

Number symbolism is just very flexible in general. All Hussie really had to do was introduce a few 'important' numbers, and the fandom could start finding them everywhere!

Anonymous asked: This may be the wrong place to ask, but have you deleted your post of analyzing the Let the Squiddles Sleep song? I can't seem to find it anywhere.

Here it is. Hopefully you're able to see it now!

Anonymous asked: Will the Mega-Ask-Compilation and Liveblog Recap also happen? ~LOSS (19/2/23)

The former is currently taking place. The latter was planned, but after skimming my blog for a bit, I realized I didn't have as much to say about it as I thought I did. Plus, it's been ages, so I'm really excited to look at some new pages. We can leave the old ones for later - I'll probably do some sort of blog retrospective eventually.

Anonymous asked: i figure the trolls' battlefield went through a full set of dnd dice/platonic solids, plus maybe some other notable johnson solids like a truncated icosahedron (aka a soccer ball or buckminsterfullerene), before becoming a sphere. maybe the outer ring went through stages like simple torus, mobius strip, borromean rings or other fun knots, before becoming a mobius net. (not really sure what a mobius net is, mathematically, but that's apparently what the thing around the final form of the kid's battlefield is called.) or maybe something weird happens with that many prototypings, and the battlefield turns into a tesseract or a klein bottle or a menger sponge or a mandelbulb.

If you so much as look at the Battlefield created by the Gigasession, your brain will leak out of your ears.

@manorinthewoods asked: <3Dave, >3>John, >3oJade, <>Rose (by process of elimination) ~LOSS (5/6/23)

I don’t think either of the girls have worn a playing card symbol. The leaf on Jade’s Wardrobifier does kind of look like a spade, but John’s already got that quadrant on lockdown.

Anonymous asked: Reading stuff about skaia on this blog reminded me of madoka, and made me consider that skaia might be like kyube and the other incubators and sburb is skaias way of keeping the unerverse from decaying

Reading this ask makes me realize that Rose is a near-perfect mark for Kyubey.

There’s only one way to save your session, Seer. Form a contract with me, and become a magical girl.

Anonymous asked: man. i dont know what i expected to happen when you found it. but for The Baby Is You to be liveblogged in less than 20 words during a post was not the way i expected it to go

I know it’s not technically part of Homestuck canon, but it really feels like Homestuck canon to me - at least to the same degree as Sweet Bro and Hella Jeff, and I liveblogged that.

Anonymous asked: begging (lightheartedly) for you to add posts like LOLCAT and "this guy's an orb" to one of the liveblog tags. they're pretty funny, and it's nice to see off-the-cuff reactions like that, haha. imo it'd be a shame for new readers to miss those kind of posts

Done! I sometimes forget to tag posts like that, because I usually just fire them off and forget about ‘em.

@captorations asked: “Give me a set of rules, and I'll analyze the hell out them, every time.” hello fellow doom player. hope you like the color green

Based on ~ATH’s association with curses, as well as Sollux’s programming hobby, I think there’s a decent chance that Doom relates to coding in some way.

Coding is all about rules, so perhaps Doom, is, in fact, the aspect of rules and logic. I'm not sure why such an aspect would be named 'doom', but it's been obvious for a while that these aspect names aren't always literal.

Anonymous asked: I’d just like to clarify some terminology because it seems relevant, but Aradia isn’t a red blood, she’s a rust blood

[The blood colors all have canon names: Aradia = rust blood Tavros = bronze blood Sollux = gold blood Nepeta = olive blood Kanaya = jade blood Terezi = teal blood Vriska = blue blood (I like cerulean better tho) Equius = indigo blood Gamzee = purple blood Eridan = violet blood Feferi = fuchsia blood and Karkat has no official blood name, but people usually call him mutant blood or candy-red blood - C ]

Oh, there are official names for each color? That’s going to be helpful to disambiguate each blood caste, especially when we really start digging into troll culture and biology.

Anonymous asked: I do believe the top-left ship on the wall - no, Karkat doesn't have red eyes. […] It's probably Vrisrezi, yes, but it could also be Vriskat.

Yeah, I’m still not sure who this ship is supposed to represent.

They have Terezi’s eyes, but the hair and symbol look like Karkat’s. Plus, Nepeta hates this ship, which would make sense if it’s between her crush and someone other than her.

Honestly, my best guess is that it was meant to be Karkat, and the red eyes were just a mistake on Hussie’s part.

Anonymous asked: something I never thought about… is the blue blood sourced from equius or did he get a stock.

Aradia has real blue indigo blood in her veins, and it almost certainly belongs to Equius himself. He could have got it from a donor, but I personally doubt there was anyone else he could ask. Equius feels like he'd be an outsider, even to other indigo-bloods.

Anonymous asked: vriska would be a good strider

Vriska Serket raised by Bro Strider would be the most terrifying character imaginable. I don't even want to contemplate what that upbringing would do to her.

Anonymous asked: Any piece of lore hussie writes needs to contend with the fact that hussie is resolutely committed to the bit. Hence all the words on how different trolls are being entirely blasted aside by 'and then they're just grey humans anyway lmao'

That's the price of admission into Homestuck, for better or for worse. Hussie quite clearly enjoys screwing with us, and we have to take everything we see in the comic with a huge pinch of salt.

Anonymous asked: I'll disagree a bit on the phrasing that Eridan forces Feferi to <> him because firstly she doesn't even seem convinced that he would commit genocide and secondly she dropped him super easily once the lusus-feeding is no longer necessary. While understandable, that doesn't suggest to me someone who is obliged by Eridan's aggression to pacify him. I think she has much more agency in this relationship (or lack thereof I suppose) than that.

Feferi definitely had her doubts – but she must have believed that Eridan was dangerous to a certain degree, because that’s the basis of a moirallegiance.

Forced might not be the right word, but she certainly felt some amount of obligation to pacify him. She sure wasn’t in that relationship for the good of her health.

Anonymous asked: So, Vriska has a conversation with Karkat, where he says she seems to have blackrom feelings for Tavros, but that he doesn't think Tavros can even feel blackrom properly. Then she has another conversation with Tavros in which she antagonizes him, and he notices, but just kind of ignores it and doesn't respond emotionally. Then we see her make a huge dramatic redrom gesture and kiss him. She vacillated because he wasn't into her… incel behavior.

Yup. I’ve always held that Tavros never wanted anything to do with Vriska. He doesn't want to love or hate her - what he really wants is to live in a world where she doesn't exist.

Vriska’s refusal to accept this basic fact is one of the main reasons she’s decided to make his life a living hell.

Anonymous asked: I headcanon that troll blood is analog, but the empire culls non-digital colors because they make the troll race seem like a joke or something. Lol

If there were minor variations in blood color, the Empire probably wouldn’t want to acknowledge it, since the stratification of blood classes forms the basis of their society.

We haven’t seen any trolls besides our twelve (apart from Troll Will Smith) so we can’t compare the blood of two members of the same caste - but we can speculate. Human blood color is known to vary depending on its oxygenation level, and I imagine troll blood would reflect its current chemical composition in the same way.

Anonymous asked: Vriska must be seething while Karkat introduces the concept of quadrants to the reader. Imagine this basic and important facet of troll life, and you're just getting schoolfed it. (This message was sent on 20/10/22.)

This was a fun bit of weirdness from early Hivebent, wasn’t it? In retrospect, it's kind of hilarious that Karkat decided to infodump to Vriska about the obscure, niche topic of… dating.

@sanctferum asked: According to his formspring, Hussie's self-insert's classpect is Waste of Space. He also briefly considers Huss of Lips. This is obviously not meant to be taken seriously but. since you asked @absinthe-and-alabaster asked: i believe hussie said somewhere that FedoraFreak's classpect was "Gent of Piss" Anonymous asked: (not sure if this is technically a spoiler but) hussie has jokingly said that fedorafreak's class is a gent.

If Dad Egbert was a Player, then the Gent class would be forced into canonical existence, as the only class that could possibly define him.

Anonymous asked: If Vriska's control does require the victim to on some level want to do the thing, then Sollux's insistence that you do not under any circumstance eat the mind honey could be something he developed in response to that incident. So that if she ever controls him again, she won't be able to make him eat it.

Wow, I never considered that. That’s a very good (and tragic) take, and I think I'm at least locking it in as a headcanon.

Anonymous asked: the official extended zodiac actually has… 288 signs, if im doing my math right? and also probably hadn't yet been conceptualized when that page was posted (the earliest known evidence comes from 2015). i don't know if any thought was put into the number or if it was just pulled from their ass, but there was a running gag in hussie's q&as where he repeatedly threatened us with a 10,000 page intermission focused on 48 squiddles, each representing a sign from the alternian zodiac Anonymous asked: I believe the troll zodiac is one of the few things in HS lore that was truly retconned, there’s actually 288 signs.

Move over, 48 Squiddles. I want to hear about the 288-player clusterfuck that actually gave rise to Alternia!

@manorinthewoods asked: wheee, you got to the first god tiering! this probably opens up a load of new things to say, so, first off: do you think you need to have a full echeladder to god tier? vriska implied so.

She never outright stated that it was required, but I still think it probably is. You generally need to max out your class levels before you can prestige.

@morganwick asked: Believe it or not, you're still in the "Homestuck could have updated RIGHT NOW" phase of the comic's release schedule. The break after the Equius-Aradia kiss aside, the hiati you've heard horror stories about didn't start becoming a thing until the end of Act 5.

[this was around page 3000. still true at this page though - C]

Hussie’s sheer productivity at this stage continues to astound. Could you imagine having that much creative energy?

Maybe Hussie just drinks twenty coffees a day.

Anonymous asked: as someone who is Normal about aradia it's an absolute delight to see someone dig into her character. she's so fascinating to me. (also, fun fact, a while ago tumblr voted her the coolest character in all of homestuck. so there's that)

Aradia’s awesome, and I still don’t think her death is going to stick.

Her ghost was perfectly capable of existing without a body, so there's no reason she can’t survive her new body's destruction.

Anonymous asked: feferi hasn't just woken up, she won't be stuck asleep until 3 hours and 14 minutes into the future! timestamps, yo

Consider this the first mark on my otherwise impeccable record.

Anonymous asked: does cat have a troll/kidsona? itd be interesting to see a full 4 player session in art

[No kidsona, yes trollsona, but even a picture of her would spoil stuff from Act 6 😆 - C]

What she said. It’ll be a while until we can meet KATYAA SCRENR.

@mhafanlol2000 asked: Hey! You can just call me Fan. In all honesty I’m just some guy who likes your liveblog. He/him. I’m gonna list some fan aspects, and I want to see what you think they’d represent, and what abilities they’d give Law Dreams Might Shape Flow

Ooh, more fan aspects! These were a lot of fun to puzzle out the last time.

Law would be the aspect of command, instruction and agreement. An example power would be giving someone a simple rule they're compelled to follow, such as 'don't turn around'.

Dreams would be the aspect of ideas, motivation and symbolism. An example power would be the ability to detect people's idle thoughts - the things they're not even aware they're thinking about.

Might would be the aspect of growth, conflict and evolution. An example power would be the ability to temporarily enhance someone's Aspect abilities, at the cost of making those abilities harder to control.

Shape would be the aspect of form, encapsulation and topology. Shapeshifting is the most obvious application of this aspect, but it's appropriate.

Flow would be the aspect of persistence, momentum and continuity. An example power would be the ability to 'continue' something that has recently stopped. For example, if your PC ran out of power, they'd be able to keep it running for a while. The longer it had been previously running, the longer they could keep it running.

@martinkhall asked: I think Bro might have been raised entirely by shonen anime and My Little Pony Friendship is Magical (the version that existed only in the heads of the worst examples of Bronys). And puppets. Puppets were definitely involved in raising Bro. Anonymous asked: "He has no known relationship with any of the other parents, but was definitely getting foreknowledge of Sburb from somewhere. I’m not even sure I want to know what sort of childhood produces Bro Strider." well. i mean. he grew up with Lil Cal didn't he? the clearly haunted puppet from the sburban dreamscape of derse? it was what he dropped to earth with. i feel like that might explain at least a small part of, like, whatever he had going on.

That’s true. I don’t trust that puppet one bit, and we don’t know what it was up to before the start of the session.

I still suspect that the thing’s still just as alive as it was on Derse, and is just choosing to play dead.

Anonymous asked: I imagine you might've already been told this, but when checking out your FAQ I noticed you described PS/PQ/FS as "not exactly canon" and that you're less interested in liveblogging them because one of your favorite parts is watching all the story come together -- without spoiling anything, I find it pertinent to mention that Pesterquest & Friendsim definitely contribute to the wider "canon" even though dubiously canon themselves. Definitely "part of the story" so to speak.

Yeah, we’ll have to see what comes of this. The problem is that I’m still fuzzy on what ‘dubiously canon’ actually means.

Hopefully that will become more clear as I’m actually liveblogging these tie-in materials – which I am planning on doing. Only time will tell how in-depth the liveblog will actually be, though.

@manorinthewoods asked: In my Sundered opinion, Bec Noir is the best character design in Homestuck. I can't think of any other interesting designs at the moment, other than some which don't beat him and are spoilers anyway (like LE's). Which design do you find most interesting, out of the ones you have? ~LOSS (22/9/23)

I definitely agree that BecJack has one of the best designs in the comic. Plus, Scratch is so weirdly intimidating for a cueball-head.

Anonymous asked: My favorite part of PKWU is just how pointy Gamzee's chin is. It's so… Defined.

iT’s ToO lAtE, ErIdAn! I’vE AlReAdY DePicTeD MySeLf As ThE ChAd, AnD yOu As ThE SoYjAk >:o)

Anonymous asked: i need you to know ag canonically ripped off the sleeves on all of her shirts just to show off the robot arm

I believe it. I don't even need a source; this is just so true to Vriska's character that it's obviously correct.

@bladekindeyewear asked: If you and your ask screener decide that literary/external-media hero title examples without any details or explanation are alright to pass on unless they're too obviously revealing -- and those in and of themselves are usually in heavy dispute by classpect theorists -- I've long been of the opinion that Monkey D. Luffy and Peter Pan are the best possible literary examples of a Page of Breath.

All Pages of Breath must be associated with pirates. No exceptions.

Anonymous asked: unfun fact: the reason rose and jade dont have a lot of pesterlogs with eachother is just because their text colours were kinda eyestrainy together. thats it thats literally the whole reason!! god damn

Hussie: "I don't write Rose/Jade conversations because they’re hard to read."

Also Hussie:

Anonymous asked: you have officially passed my second favourite flash in literally all of homestuck. it's all so well hinted at beforehand but it still comes to punch you in the gut nonetheless Anonymous asked: My favourite thing in this flash is how the name of the flash isn't John: Rise Up, it's JOHN. RISE UP. it's WV sending a plead to John to not die. My second favourite thing is the way the music remixes Doctor (The theme for LoWaS). Anonymous asked: [S] JOHN. RISE UP. is one of my favorite flashes in all of Homestuck. Savior of the Waking World is some of Toby's best work What are your thoughts on our first taste of god tier? @violetsquare111 asked: So glad you liked Savior of the Waking World! One of my favorites in the comic for sure. It takes a lot of ideas from another of Toby's songs, Penumbra Phantasm, a song that… never actually got finished or officially released. There's still various renditions of it though, and the HS collection links a couple of em. (Some people have speculated that Penumbra Phantasm itself was never supposed to be a Homestuck song, and might end up being used in Deltarune, which would be cool as hell) Anonymous asked: It's crazy to think that just about 12 hours ago John was wearing silly disguises to fool his dad and now he's dying to become a god.

God time!

I do think it was the most emotional flash we’ve had, on the strength of the music alone. Savior of the Waking World goes hard as all hell.

Honestly, when WV started calling John a hero, and telling him to rise, it did start to give me some mild chills. Like, yeah – we know John’s a hero, but it feels extra special when it’s coming from someone who’s normally so irreverent.

@elkian asked: Welcome back, hope you're feeling better! I am losing it a bit over you IMMEDIATELY understanding how this coin flip sitch works, something about the narrative and reasoning doesn't match my brain so I've reread it multiple times with total understanding out of grasp and watching you dissect it halfway into the page is truly wild (delighted). Also feel like I understand it a lil better with your analysis.

Thank you! This message was actually sent the last time I returned from a pause, so apologies that I’m one hiatus late in answering it.

@royalvorpal asked: I just reread your entire blog in anticipation. Anonymous asked: This is such a good liveblog, I'm rereading it again and you are really letting me relive the pleasant parts of my middle school years. Reading this blog makes me feel like I'm back on the school bus talking to my friend about the newest update. Thank you for doing this 💛 Anonymous asked: That return page didn't have any sound, so misleading! (I jest, nice to see you're back.) ~DJ @manorinthewoods asked: Hahahah, we are BACK! Lovely, I've missed this liveblog. Most in-depth Homestuck liveblog I'm aware of, looking forward to the restart! ~LOSS (29/3/24) @popcornsalty asked: So excited to see you back!!! :D @chaosorchestrator asked: welcome back! It's good to hear that you're planning on getting back into it! I hope things have been going ok for you in the meantime! @necrowyrm asked: HAPPY 4/13 (OR AS THE ENLIGHTENED KNOW IT: 13/4) AND WELCOME BACK!!!!!!!!!!!

Thank you for your votes of confidence, and happy 13/4 to you all!

@rippledphysique asked: Just found this blog and devoured it in a few days. I am selfishly wishing you the best in health and life so that it may return one day… @elkian asked: Hey Sally! Just wanted to wish you well on the recovery, the plague is no joke and I hope you've been able to enjoy some kind improvement. And that 2024 will be kinder, as well. Anonymous asked: wishing you the best in your interim, hopefully you can get a better position where you're not prone to burning out! Anonymous asked: Hope you're doing ok!! I miss seeing your cool liveblog on my dash @kittycatttmattt asked: Poor girl… Got killed by the schedule

Thanks for all the well-wishes, as well. Really, it wasn’t the schedule that was the issue – I just had a lot going on in the background last year. That’s all over now, though!

Anonymous asked: yeah, Homestuck's back babeyyyyy - the site was crashing because of traffic and everything @calamitascalliope asked: You coming back from your break resurrected Homestuck's corpse hggfffdd Anonymous asked: i think this actually is the first time homestuck has updated since you started liveblogging lol - homestuck 2 has been inactive assumed abandoned since december 25th 2020. also happy slightly belated blogiversary btw - you've been delighting us with your journey for two years now! @heliotropopause asked: New Homestuck upd8 just dropped. Apparently. Anonymous asked: what are the odds that you start liveblogging again the same exact day that postcanon comes back from the dead? Anonymous asked: crazy news. so literally just today, october 8th 2023, hussie has officially given complete free license to the newly formed "homestuck independent creative union" (HICU) to create content and monetize it with the homestuck brand however they see fit, with zero creative or financial control from any corporations or even hussie themself, though hussie has said they're available for consultation whenever the HICU wants their input. the HICU seems to be made up of people the community largely has respect for, and the person heading all of this up is James Roach, who is one of the most widely respected individual who has been inolved in homestuck "post canon" (ie. after homestuck itself ended). nobody was expecting any of this, it's completely bonkers. hopes are looking pretty high for homestuck compared to where they were merely a day ago.

Throwback to the day I personally resurrected Homestuck.

Has anything come of this since, actually? I haven’t heard anything about this new comic – although I do scroll in the opposite direction any time I see a reference to Homestuck, so I guess it makes sense that I wouldn’t.

@corporalotherbear asked: What’s your favorite Pokémon?

Contrarian, that I am, I’ll instinctively gravitate to Missingno., if only for the nostalgia factor. Gen 1 glitches were my first real experience with pulling back the curtain of a game’s code, and taking a look at what lies beneath.

My favourite official Pokémon are Porygon-Z, Shedinja, Reuniclus and Metagross!

@heliotropopause asked: Breath/Light is an interesting one, because the ‘Mixolydian’ implies a musical theme, and I thought Time was the musical Aspect. Maybe it’s not that simple. They've all got a musical reference in the name- they are called fraymotifs, after all. Anonymous asked: The Fraymotifs are all musical references actually. E.g. Breath/Time is "Ivories in the Fire", the ivories in question being John's piano keys. A fraymotif is a battle theme. Anonymous asked: ivories in the fire is a musical theme, especifically a Rap term used by Snoop Dogg. So yeah it's connected to Dave Anonymous asked: re: fraymotifs: you pointed out "mixolydian", but that's not the only musical term there. feather "cadence", pneumatic "progression", even fray "motif" itself! hell, the building where you buy these things has an emblem with a crossed sword and music note! so i think this might be less a situation of "need to rethink time aspects association with music" and more "fraymotifs have a musical association also" Anonymous asked: if you look a bit closer at those names, (including the one "fraymotif",) you may realize that "mixolydian" isn't the only musical term referenced…. @galaxa-13 asked: You say the breath/Light Fraymotif implies a musical theme, but they all do! Fraymotif is a portmanteau of "fray" (to fight) and "leitmotif" (repeated musical phrase). Each Fraymotif name implies a musical theme.

Dang it. Yup, they’re all pretty obvious references to music.

I wrote that post the day I was trying to wrangle our family PC into running the Homestuck Collection without lag, so I was a little distracted at the time. Please direct all complaints to Windows XP.

#asks #full liveblog #act 5.2 #this is just the first part of the comp. I have enough asks for another one. maybe another two. we'll see

90 notes · View notes

blackopals-world · 8 months

Note

What's the NRC staff's experience at ♨️!Yuu's bath house? I don't believe you've ever written about it in detail; only mentioning it on ♨️!Yuu's initial post. Then again I may have missed it since Tumblr is being rude right now. Feel free to gloss over this one if it doesn't seem like something you want to answer.

I haven't written about this yet.

The staff are in the unique position of having free access to the Onsen and its service. In exchange, it gets to operate without an alcohol license.

Yuu has promised that all the drinks are watered-down to the legal requirements and no one is getting drunk (which is only half true.) Keeping the faculty in the loop keeps Yuu out of trouble.

The Onsen has a private spring designated for VIPs and faculty. It has unlimited food and bottle service.

The main reason the adults use it is because it's the only place to relax away from students. Say what you want but standing all day, and being surrounded by unruly brats is exhausting. The onsen is perfect for getting away.

Everyone has a reason to go and it differs for everyone.

Trein

He's old he needs a good soak in the mineral baths. He usually drinks a strong soju and talks to Yuu about his younger days. Grandpa has a lot of wild stories before he became a teacher. He also goes on and on about his wife and how they fell in love.

He treats Yuu like a grandkid and goes to the onsen mostly for the atmosphere.

Crewel

He completely changes when he's relaxed. Yeah, he is worried about Yuu but when he is tired he needs to cut loose. He will literally let his hair down for one thing. He smokes even if Yuu gives him the stink eyes and tells him to take it outside.

He usually let's Yuu mix him a cocktail or a house wine of their choosing.

He uses the spa services the most. Facials, manicures, pedicures, and hair treatments.

Behind all that, if you get him in at the same time as Sam he's a college student again. Roughhousing, drinking, and telling vulgar jokes. If Yuu isn't there to see it.

Sam

The only reason he's still allowed is because he supplies the Spa and bar. He doesn't ask questions either.

He orders hard liquor, dark. Whiskey, vermouth, and Adictivo Doble Reposado (a favorite in my family) He once tried to get away with ordering absinthe and was poured a glass of water.

He enjoys the steam room says it feels like a hot summer Louisiana day by the bayou. (Trust me you with that was true. Louisiana summers can be amazing but the swamp is no joke)

Sam likes to goad the others into drinking more before challenging them to a few rounds of cards. He doesn't play any of the workers because Yuu trains them on how to win or lose games on purpose. Those girls could whoop your butt.

Vargas

He needs a good ice bath and massage after training. He views the onsen as an important part of taking care of your health. Taking time to relax the muscles and taking care of your body is key to a long life and healthy mind.

That being said he orders tons of beer and food. We can't all be perfect. He falls asleep sometimes and snores like a bear.

He likes to play ping-pong in the game room but he's really bad at it. No one tells him because he's so determined to win. It's doesn't matter because if everyone is drunk they all suck but think they are playing the best game of pong ever.

Crowley

Banned.

Fine. He's allowed. Begrudgingly.

He isn't treated badly but Yuu would rather he leave. But the onsen would be shut down he didn't agree to let it stay open.

He takes off the mask for once and scared Yuu.

"Who are you?!"

"What are you asking? It is me your dear headmage."

"You're lying! Where is the bird man?!"

Yeah, no object permanence here.

Crowley will get wasted off his ass and join in any chaos the others create. Children, the lot of them. He drinks just about anything. It's whatever suits his fancy that day.

He gets his hair done while he's there along with his nails. Yuu finds it weird that his hair creates a natural black oil like some species of bird and his nails are as hard as talons and just as sharp.

#onsen!yuu #twisted wonderland #twisted wonderland x reader #twisted wonderland yuu #divus crewel #twst divus #mozus trein #twst trein #twst sam #vargas #twst vargas #coach vargas #twst dire crowley #twisted wonderland crowley #twst crowley

285 notes · View notes

spiderispunk · 5 months

Text

Sorry for the long analysis but I gotta get this out:

Snow’s disgust about the mockingjays is so interesting. First that they’re muttations, and secondly that they’re a symbol that the Capitol is not permanent. He thinks the jabberjays are “impressive pieces of engineering” (Collins 445) but “refers to the mockingjays as “genes gone bad” (Collins 504). Jabberjays represent Capitol ingenuity, a lab experiment that was perfect in theory, and perfectly controlled until they went into the wild. Then the rebels found a way to outsmart and snub the Capitol. A slap in the face,m. And then a second one when then the jabberjays mated with wild, district birds. Mockingjays represent corruption. An unforeseen consequence of putting the two species together. Not completely district, but not quite Capitol either. The idea of which is not something that Snow can comprehend because he sees the world in black and white. Order and Chaos. District and Capitol. There is no conceivable middle ground.

The jabberjays were also never meant to be permanent. They’re all male. They would have died out eventually after they served their purpose. But they survived, only by mating with birds outside of the Capitol. Then they’ve mutated into something wholly different and unnatural to Snow. No longer purely Capitol, but not completely district either. In a way they represent what should have been the natural progression of Panem. There’s no way the Capitol could survive forever segregated from the districts— genetically, physically, whatsoever. But Snow and his Capitol counterparts are afraid of that, because what happens to their pure genes, their fictional superiority, if they begin to mix with the districts. The way they treat Sejanus is evidence of that fear, because he challenges their preconceived notions of how district-born people should be. They compare district-born people to beasts and animals, claiming they’d drink blood, or spiral into anarchy without the guiding hand of the Capitol. But Sejanus isn’t like that. Lucy Gray isn’t either. But sympathy for them equals sympathy for everyone in the districts, and that’s a no go. That’s why Snow goes to such lengths to convince himself that Lucy Gray isn’t district— not really, not in the ways that count (literally not having a permanent residence in the districts). But they can’t admit that they need the districts. They can’t survive without the districts, not for long. But they can’t accept that, and their inability to see the districts as people— not second class citizens— and treat them as such, causes the Capitol’s eventual demise.

TLDR: TBOSBAS, and the entire Hunger Game series at large is an allegory for relationships between the colonizer and the colonized, as well as power, control and white supremacy.

#I love Suzanne Collins so much #the hunger games #the ballad of songbirds and snakes #coriolanus snow #lucy gray baird

246 notes · View notes

lets-try-some-writing · 2 months

Note

For your "Sparling of Unicron AU, Unicron is an Oops Dad Spinoff," how would the bots react to OP dragging Unicron back to base by his audials, determined to make him behave like a dad to the kids? How would OP react to, idk, the kids telling him that he (OP) is a better dad than Unicron could ever be?

This feels like almost like something worthy of a snippet. Maybe it is worth a snippet. We shall see.

Crack part in question, here.

━━━━━━ ⊙ ❖ ⊙ ━━━━━━━━━━━━

Optimus was by no means the perfect son. He knew his purpose, he knew his design. He could handle himself alone. But the children? They needed a father. They needed to at least have closure. Leaving the team alone with children of Unicron was not advisable by any means, but Optimus had no intention of bring his entire team with him down to Unicron's core. They were not likely to survive the journey.

So off he went. He left in the middle of the night, catching only Rafael's curious gaze as he went through the ground bridge. The child sensed his intent, and neither said a word. Optimus was quick to arrive at Unicron's core, and it was there that the chaos god continued to remain silent.

Optimus: Father, why will you not heed me? Your children await you.

Unicron: ...

Optimus: Father, you made them. You made US. You cannot abandon us like this.

Unicron: ...

Optimus: Maker, creator, why will you not listen?!

Unicron: ...

Optimus: Keep your silence if you must. But you WILL come to your children and at least let them feel you presence.

Optimus: This is not a request. This is a command.

Unicron: ...

Unicron: Is this what you wish?

Optimus: Yes. I do not ask that you love them, but I do ask that you give them a chance. They are your creations, whether you like it or not.

Quietly, Unicron gathered his strength to create an avatar. Optimus nodded silently once it was formed. It was smaller than the giants that roamed during Unicron's waking. It came only up to Optimus's height, but that was all it needed to be.

Summoning a bridge back, Optimus brought Unicron's avatar with him just in time to catch the team worriedly looking around for him. They froze in horror when he came through with Unicron at his heels. The normal Cybertronians present instinctively prepared for battle. But the children? They stared in silence. Jack frowned, his fists clenched at his sides. Miko huffed and crossed her arms, completely unafraid. Rafael for his part glared but otherwise did nothing as Optimus shoved Unicron forward with an order to speak to his offspring.

The tension in the base was so thick it could have been cut with a knife. The children said nothing, Unicron said nothing, and instead they stared at each other with mixed apathy and disgust on both sides. Ratchet and the rest hissed at Optimus, demanding to know why he brought the Unmaker into their base. Optimus for his part attempted to explain, but that was when the children decided to make their move.

Rafael: I don't care that you are my father, but you left me and my friends for far too long to come into our lives now.

Unicron: I had no intention of interacting with my unwanted spawn. I care only for my firstborn.

Optimus: Father-!

Jack: Glad you are at least willing to admit you don't care about us.

Miko: Optimus has been more of a dad to us than YOU!

Unicron: Let him tend to you then. I have no interest in these affairs.

Optimus: Father! You can't just-!

Unicron: I shall await further communications from you, my firstborn.

Unicron left without another word, his avatar vanishing into the void. Optimus stood there dumbfounded and upset. How could his maker do this to his own children? He had cast them away to their faces. Sure they had not asked to be made, nor had Unicron intended to make them, but they were his children all the same.

The only relief from the interaction that came was in the form of the children reconfirming that they did in fact see Optimus as more of a parent than Unicron. It shouldn't have been surprising, but after everything, Optimus could only quietly accept the role with a smile. If his father would not be there for his spawn, Optimus could take up the role without issue.

#transformers #maccadam #transformers prime #optimus prime #team prime #tfp kids #miko nakadai #jack darby #rafael esquivel #alternate universe #sparkling of unicron au

103 notes · View notes

mika-no-sekai-blog · 1 month

Text

Word count: 2800+

Warnings: mentions of blood, nausea

I lightly edited it, but as I have headache I probably didn't notice quite a lot of mistakes. I know I could try another time, but I'm afraid this will take few days

Part XIV | Part XVI

Even days after your conversation with Feyre, your mind was often returning back to Tamlin with more worries than sadness. You somehow assumed that he didn't miss you as much as you missed him and that he most likely forgot about you and moved on, focusing on his court and its restoration. Otherwise he would stop Rhys back then or he would come to visit you or at least tried to contact you. But what if he couldn't? What if Feyre was right and Tamlin was hurt by your departure?

You wanted to ask somebody about Tamlin and his wellbeing, needed it, but who would answer you? Who could have such information?

Rhys, as High Lord, most likely knew what was happening in Spring Court. However he wouldn't tell you. You dismissed the thought as soon as it occurred to you because, well, now you knew your brother well. Although he left Tamlin alive, angry wasn't a strong enough word to describe his feelings toward him. And except of his family, Rhysand hardly forgave and definitely never forgot.

Another person who could know something, was Azriel. As a spymaster he for sure kept an eye on other courts. He was kind and nice to you, but no matter what feelings he had, his loyalty to your brother was on the first place. If you asked him, he could tell about it to Rhys and then it would be even more difficult to learn anything from anyone.

Feyre mentioned the redhead, Lucien, who claimed to be Tamlin's friend. You hadn't seen him around, but apparently he came for visit from time to time. He seemed to be the only possible choice. Only problem was how to contact him.

Tamlin wasn't the only one occupying your mind. In moments when you weren't thinking about him, your mind filled with old memories and feelings that Rhys revived. You had only one sitting with him so far and even though it was days ago, you were still confused and needed time to process it.

The memories made your life easier in certain ways. You didn't feel so out of place, so homesick anymore. This place changed, but people even though a bit older where still the same. Your current feelings kept mixing together with the old ones and you couldn't say how you felt about individual members of your family and that was main reason of the chaos in your heart.

Thankfully there was Azriel always ready to patiently listen to your rambling which helped you clarify your thoughts and slowly work through it. He never failed you and advised you wisely, guided you when you got lost.

And so it happened that you started meeting him more often, sometimes spending even all day long with him. You were afraid to leave Rhys' property because of the possibility to be again engulfed in the smell of magic. In order to get rid of the stress fresh air and mainly the contact with nature were very important for you. Therefore you were mostly outside, walking together in the garden, rarely staying inside of the house.

The garden around the house was large, kind of smaller park, full of flowers and surprisingly even herbs. It reminded you of your life in the forest and walks with Tamlin. You always picked up some herbs and Azriel made you a tea out of them. In the evening you sat together on the terrace, sipping your teas and silently watched the setting sun. However peaceful these moments were, they weren't perfect and you always missed something. It was unsettling.

Your life was changing little by little, but you weren't content with it. You knew you loved your brother and his two best friends, Mor became kind of friend, although still far from the relationship you had before memory loss, but better than last few weeks. Amren was complicated. You hardly met her at all, so it didn't matter much. You liked even Feyre. However her sisters were different case.

You didn't mind Nesta. She wasn't kind, but she wasn't bad or mean to you. She just.. was. The oldest of the sisters had enough of own problems to solve. And Elain? Before you hardly saw her, now you were meeting her wherever you went. She was like your shadow, staring and frowning at you every time you looked in her direction.

There were also small incidents. Salt in your drinks, dirt on clothes Rhys gave you, that just came back from washing, small amounts of grass, dirt or mud raining on you while you took a walk in the garden alone. At first you tried to ignore it. However the situation was escalating and it was hard to ignore now. You didn't want to point a finger to the culprit, but you knew who's doing it was.

After some time when you didn't react, culprit took it even further. Now it wasn't only following you around and angry looks. Every time you spoke with Azriel Elain appeared and totally ignoring the fact you were in the middle of conversation she started telling him about flowers or something that just happened to her.

Azriel was shocked at first, but as it repeated daily, you knew him enough to notice he was starting to be fed up by her behaviour. Still he tried to be gentleman and gently dismissed her, pointing out the fact that he was busy with something else which she paid no attention to and kept talking, flashing smiles at him.

At those awkward moments, well, you rather backed up. Giving up on your favourite time with Azriel was the best and easiest thing to do to prevent being in the center of the drama. Whatever was between the two of them, it had nothing to do with you. Or that was what you believed. You just assured Azriel that it's okay, that you could talk later and left.

One afternoon, after being again interrupted by Elain, you were wandering through the house aimlessly when you heard an angry voice coming from behind the Rhys' closed office doors. Normally you would ignore it and leave quickly to give him privacy, but when you heard Tamlin's name, you couldn't help it and came closer listening.

"I'm telling you, Rhysand, it's much worse than before. If we don't do something and very quickly, it'll be too late," the voice snarled. That voice. You had already heard it somewhere. But where?

"She is the only one who can help him. Let her at least visit him and talk with him.."

"No," you heard Rhys flatly refuse. "In this state Tamlin is too dangerous. He could hurt her."

"I'm sure he won't."

"Look at yourself. You are his closest friend, yet he would turn you into shreds if you didn't winnow away fast enough. I won't risk her life." Closest friend? Was it possible that the fox-like redhead was in Rhys' office now?

"He seems to have feelings for her and pretty deep ones. Otherwise he wouldn't be so broken after you snatched her away," Lucien snapped.

"Don't dare you!"

There was silence for a moment.

"Your sister is the only person who can help him get out of it. We both know it," Lucien said lowly, his voice still angry, but he tried to speak more calmly. With his every word your heart clenched so painfully that if you looked down at your chest, you were sure you would see a deep gaping wound there.

"You may not agree, but this isn't something you can decide. We ought to ask your sister what she wants. What she thinks. You've already decided for her that she has to come here with you, however, I heard that she doesn't like it. That she isn't happy here and wants to return to Spring Court. If that's the true you can't hold her here against her will."

"You would be surprised how much has changed since your last visit." Now Rhysand was definitely mad, his deep voice icy, dangerous. You hoped Lucien was smart enough not to annoy your brother even more. It could cost him too much.

"If you want to save Spring Court, she is the best shot we have. Think about it carefully. There's little time left."

You didn't need to stay to know what Rhysand answered him. It was too clear. With wildly beating heart you left unnoticed. You knew their conversation was over. Rhysand didn't want to even think about your return to Spring.

You didn't hear what exactly happened to Tamlin, but it wasn't necessary at the moment. You were already too worried after talking with Feyre. However now wasn't the time for that. You had to act. This was the chance you hoped for. Lucien was here and you had to take an advantage of it. He would leave soon, but you needed to talk with him before that, somewhere nobody could see you or hear you.

You hid into a dark alcove in a hall that Lucien had to pass on his way out and waited. Long time nothing happened, house was too silent and you started to worry that he left through the garden. You shut eyes, tears gathering in them, your head fell back against the wall. You missed him, your only chance to learn something about Tamlin.

A sound of angry footsteps filled the hall. Somebody was coming your way. You held your breath, peeking from your hideaway. As the person passed by the window his hair caught the light, shining brightly as a fire. You breathed a sigh of relieve. It was Lucien.

When he was only few inches from your alcove you whispered. "We need to talk."

Lucien's eyes widened, following your voice to the darkness you hid in. It took only a second. He halted and bending down he pretended to adjust his shoelaces. "Where?" he whispered. Really clever of him. You smiled.

"Meet me in the garden. Under the oak tree."

Without another word he stood up and left. You waited long enough and then stepped out from your hideaway. Walking slowly as if nothing happened, you headed to the opposite direction. You passed the terrace and stepped into the garden. Pretending to be on one of your strolls, you walked until the house disappeared behind the dense grove.

A massive oak tree grew in the farthest part of the grounds, hidden from prying eyes. It was ideal place for secret meeting. You looked around. You were all alone. You hoped Lucien would be already waiting here, but maybe he couldn't find this place even though this was the only oak tree in the garden. You sat down dejectedly between two strong roots and pulled knees to your chest, praying to the forgotten gods for a pinch of luck.

"I hoped to see you around," male's voice came from behind your back. You turned around, eyes wide. You didn't hear him come. Lucien stood there leaning against the tree trunk, hands crossed on his chest, playful smirk on his face. "And meanwhile you came to me."

He reminded you of a curious fox, his russet and gold eyes scanned you from head to toes. His smirk disappeared and jaw clenched, eyes narrowed. "I shouldn't have mentioned you in front of him," he muttered more to himself than to you.

You were curious what it was about, but you didn't ask. You were sure you already know the answer. You decided to get straight to the point.

"I heard what you and Rhys were talking about." With a thoughtful expression he scanned you one more time.

"You are really interesting being," he muttered. "I didn't know we had company. But I didn't sense you in that hallway either."

You shrugged. "What happened to Tamlin?"

His lips pressed into a thin line, he seemed to be considering whether to answer you.

"I don't care what Rhys says or wants. In this case. Tell me everything."

He ran hand through his long red hair and sighing sat down astride on one of higher roots. He leaned back against trunk and looked into the garden.

"It's bad with him," he sighed, worried.

"Is he hurt?"

"No, I guess not yet. But.. Do you remember the state he was in when you two met?"

You nodded. "He was quite wounded."

"I didn't mean his physical state," he snorted.

"I wasn't talking about his physical state. He was depressed. So much that he didn't want to eat and drink. He had also nightmares."

"Ah." Lucien stayed silent for a few heartbeats. His voice was grave. "It's even worse now. He won't change from his beast form, snarling like wild animal, lashing his claws all around. When I went to talk with him, he tried to kill me. I don't know whether you've been in his manor, but it's in catastrophic state. Like some beast's lair. He quite destroyed it.."

Your heart grew heavier with each word. Pain in your chest and behind your eyes was almost unbearable. "Why do you think I can help him? You are his friend. You could do that, too."

Lucien's brows raised and his lips slowly parted in a grin. "Tell me. Do you know the reason why he gave you that pendant you're hiding? What it symbolises?" Your brows furrowed, but before you could open your mouth he continued. "It's not that I don't want to help him. Otherwise I wouldn't be here, right? Unfortunately I can't help him. Nobody can. Except of you." His gold mechanical eye turned too you.

It didn't make sense. Why couldn't anyone else help him? You gritted teeth.

Your fingers touched the pendant through the fabric of your clothes. How could he know about this? You took it out only in your room when you were alone. The only person who saw it was Feyre. You looked up at him.

"You didn't answer me."

He rolled his eyes, slightly annoyed by your incomprehension. "You really didn't notice? I saw you two together for a short while and noticed. For Tamlin you aren't just an ordinary friend. Whether he acknowledge it or no, he seems to have quite deep feelings for you. The pendant is proof of that. Roses have a very special meaning for him."

You turned away from him, so Lucien couldn't see your face. You were shocked by his assertion and.. hurt. That was not true. He couldn't be further from the truth. Tamlin.. he didn't need you. Last time you were together he was already fully healed, ready to leave the cottage and you behind and return to his duties. The pendant was just a gift of gratitude. There wasn't anything else behind that.

You bit down on you lip so hard you drew the blood. This just added to your overall confusion and there wasn't enough time to start spiralling now. It was only a matter of minutes before someone would start looking for you. So you pushed those thoughts away, decided to think about it later.

"What can I do to help him?"

Lucien straightened, intrigued by the change of subject. He exhaled deeply. "The best would be if you went to him. I think he needs to see you, have you close enough to touch to have some effect on him."

"I don't think Rhys would allow it."

"I've already heard his opinion," Lucien grimaced. "His is as stubborn as-"

"Be careful what you say," you snarled. "He's my brother."

Lucien gaped at you. With open mouth. "Are you kidding me? Last time I was here you couldn't stand him. Nobody here. Feyre said you-"

"Stop messing around and rather tell something I could actually do for Tamlin," you interrupted him for the second time.

He seemed to want to say something to that. His eyes narrowed at you, but changing mind the fox-like male closed his mouth and instead looked around the garden, thinking. "As I said before, your visit would be the most helpful. Maybe.. maybe you could try to write him. I'm sure he'll chew it up before finding out who sent it, but who knows. Even stranger things happened."

"I'd have to go to the house. Somebody could notice." Sudden smell of magic took your breath away and a wave of nausea rose in your throat.

Lucien handed you two sheets of paper and pen. "Is it enough?"

You just nodded with clenched teeth and taking the writing tools you stood up, walking away from him. He didn't need to know what you were writing. When you were done, you put the letter into an envelope, sealed it and handed it back to redhead.

"It better work," the sighed. "I'll let you know if he reads it or replies." With that he winnowed away.

You stayed seated under the oak tree, thinking about Tamlin and things Lucien told you, until Azriel came looking for you.

Taglist:

@impossibelle @sevikas-whore @b0xerdancer @ladylizzieofdarbyshire @tele86 @mybestfriendmademe @nocasdatsgay @yunloyal @nebarious @isabiss @st0rmyt @lilah-asteria @ubigaia

#english isnt my first language #tamlin fanfiction #tamlin x reader #tamlin acotar #tamlin #pro tamlin #rhysand #azriel #lucien #elain #acotar fanfiction #acotar #sarah j maas #fiction writing

71 notes · View notes