#im trying my best to share my experiences at a pace that feels comfortable for me
Note
Selfshippers need to kinda be careful using the term soulbonding because it's a term that has roots in the plurality/multiplicity spaces.
https://multiplicity.fandom.com/wiki/Soulbond_System
Just wanted to warn you because you're a lovely mutual and I don't want you stumbling into syscourse accidentally!
Thank you for the resource! I appreciate you looking out for me.
If I'm being honest, I agree that it could be dangerous for people to use the term lightly. It's why I've been holding back from using it myself, and I wanted to do more research before I decided to say anything about it at all. I don't feel comfortable sharing what leads me to believe that I can identify with that term or any of the culture around it yet, but I feel safe in saying that it's one that makes sense for me.
The link you sent me is actually one that I've read through before, and I encourage anyone else to read through it as well. @jamesfiance also made a post with a few resources that I thought were helpful.
I have to say that I personally can't tell anyone what their experience is, or what counts as "real soulbonding," but I ask that if anyone suspects they might be experiencing it, or if they see the term and think that it sounds cool, please do your research. It is a serious experience and a lifestyle that many people live every day with. It's like a belief system.
The plurality aspect of it is hard for me to touch on without being too personal, but I don't really find myself interacting in those communities much. I have mutuals who are plural, and if they have opinions, I'd be happy to hear about them.
I'm not the best at articulating these kinds of things, which is why I'm not someone who comments on things like this often, so I want to make it clear that I'm not claiming to be an authority on any of these things, and I can only speak for my experiences and how I believe they fit into this term and the culture around it as I've researched it. That being said, I want to reiterate that selfshippers should do their research before identifying with it. Because the experience is more than having a deep connection with an f/o, but it's hard for me to explain in a cogent and concise way.
#man ajfhklds i'm trying hard to make it clear that i am not taking any of this lightly#im just all shaky bc this is rly important to me. and i want to be able to talk about my experiences with it#and im aware that i have a not-insignificant amount of people who'll see what I post about this and i want to represent-#my thoughts and feelings correctly#i admit that i don't know much about s.yscourse or what that looks like in detail; i don't look at d.iscourse in general#but if anyone reads this and does get hurt by anything ive said or feels annoyed bc im not understanding#pls know that you can talk openly with me about it. im not a person who's fixed in these things#im always learning and trying my best to be a person who does the least harm possible#on the flipside; if im taking this way seriously and its not a big deal then i apologize#like i said; this is very important to me. ive never met people who experience this before#and i thought for a long time that i was alone in it and weird#im trying my best to share my experiences at a pace that feels comfortable for me#while still assuring people who may worry that im an interloper using the term lightly that that is not the case#thanks again anon for looking out for me <3 i appreciate the heads up#ren speaks#ask to tag#it might be good for me to come up with a tag about this kind of thing too but. i wanna brainstorm a bit
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Thunder storms give me so much anxiety can I plz get Zoro comfort during a really bad storm?? Reader tries their best to hide that they’re terribly nervous but my mans can see right through <3 thank you ily
A/n: It's been a long time since i sat down to write something i actually enjoyed. I hope you like it <3
Zoro x reader
Thunder in the seas with a reminder of his childhood
The sea clouded with darkness, large clouds turned the whole sky nearly pitch black as if it was raining ash that day. No amount of sunlight peeked through them only loud bangs of thunder. The type of thunder that rattled the ship and the seas. The one that made your ears feels as if they were about to experiance a shockwave. You hid in your room trying to avoid the noise, trying to keep busy. Not a journal not a book helped to relieve the stress you were feeling, hands meek from the heightened sense of insecurity you stared out into the window. A thing you shouldn't be doing, however seeing the lightning strike you couldnt help but to await the next bang of thunder.
Nami had warned you that clouds have been forming in the sea for a while, the winds had picked up pace so why was it so surprising that there was actual rain and thunder?
The door clanked behind you, shrouded footsteps made their way behind you, Zoro's hands slid down from your shoulder to your hands.
"Dont stare at the sea." He assured speaking in a calm and low manner like he always did.
"Wasn't staring.. Just thinking." You puff a rather large breath. The anticipation of another strike was a little unnerving. Your eyes glimmered with fear that of a lost animal. You looked up at the familiar man smiling shyly to avoid any suspicion of your fear for the weather.
He smirked, he's not stupid. Youre barley holding his hand and even if you are, its so cold and boneless.
"Im gonna catch a nap, wanna join?" he retorted ignoring the issue just a little. Anything to find a distraction for you.
"I dont think ill be able to sleep Zoro." You watched as he slid off his boots laying in your shared bed, his hands behind his head he watched out of the small window, the sea looked pitch black almost, you couldnt even see the waves Sunny left behind.
"Doesn't matter just come." He waved you over.
You sighed. When hes set on something he'll stick to it.
You sat next to him in bed feeling the shift of his weight dip into the matress as his head landed over your shoulder he spoke lazily, voice a little choaked from the position.
"Youre afraid arent you?"
You stiffened up at the words your toes curling in your boots were the only indication that he saw through you.
"A little. It's only thunder." You laughed it off as a joke and yet the second you heard the sky roaring your eyes darted to the small window. The room shook a little. The new world really had some strangley strong weather.
"I was afraid of thunder as a kid. I remember my teacher telling me i used to cry the whole night if it ever thundered." He admitted calmly his hand reaching around your chest to your other shoulder he pushed you back on the bed.
Your head landed on the side of his torso, his steady breathing unnoticably calming your nerves a little bit.
"He had to start wearing ear muffs during late summer, apparantley i was the loudest crier he had ever heard." He scratched his cheek shrugging his shoulders a little bit.
"Did you grow out of it?" You asked even though the way he relaxed on your shared bed spoke for itself.
"More than id like to admit. Sometimes it still surprises me. Today's is a little harsh." He looks over at you and then out of the window once more. Sky is still dark as ever, The Sunnys creaking under the uneven waves of the sea, the whole floor sways lightly under the shackles of it.
"Thats what we get for going out to the New world, huh?" You steady yourself upwards only to rest your read over his chest.
"It's the price we pay for Luffy's dreams." He smiles to himself arm tracing soothing circles over your back. His hand moves slowly like hes thinking over each swipe of his fingers.
His heart beat is slow and steady, roaring in his chest is only the sound of pure calm. You listen in the steady thumps keep pushing up against your cheek with each beat eliminating the sound of thunder as you lose your sense of hearing anything but his heartbeat.
His eyes close, and yet his hand still draws lazy circles over your back, he shifts a little forward placing an unusual kiss on your hair as he continues.
"I don't think it'll stop anytime soon." He speaks softly the gravel in his tone is unparred.
"We could sleep it off if that's the case." You chuckle, theres no way Luffy wouldnt come barging it at the slightest hint of hard rain exclaiming hes all soaked in the rain.
Zoros free hand moves to take out each katana out of their signature spot, he lays them besides the bed staring up into the celing.
A big yawn echoes in the room causing you to yawn aswell. Whats with that coincidental mimmickery?
"I can't picture you crying over thunder." you speak up resting a hand over his chest just before your face.
"I can. The way my teacher said, it was the most annoying thing hes ever had to hear for hours. I imagine he started telling me that thunders nothing to be afraid soon after i ruined his ears." He chuckled with a puff of breath, stifling another yawn, the circling on your back seemed to pause, coming back for a few seconds and then dissapearing once more.
He was fighting his sleep to make sure you felt alright.
"Sleep mosshead, im alright." You throw a joking nickname watching as his hand rests on the small of your back his brows furrow.
He says nothing only the sound of slow breathing fills the air his brows unfurrow lightly as you pick up your head to check on him.
"Thank you." You whisper drawing lazy circles over his chest, the thunder roars outside but it cant get inside this room anymore. His presence seems to be enough to calm down the fear that tends to set on your skin. A little noise won't do much if he's there with you.
#onepiece#one piece fanfiction#onepiece x reader#one piece#zoro x y/n#zoro fluff#one piece zoro#zoro roronoa x reader#zoro roronoa x you#roronora zoro#zoro x reader#zoro x you#roronoa zoro#zoro headcanons#ronoroa zoro#zoro imagine#roanoa zoro
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TOA Anniversary Munday!
Celebrating TOA and the people who contribute to make our group what it is.
Repost, don't reblog. Only fill in what you feel comfortable sharing!
Happy anniversary, TOA! Here's to many more years spent together.
Name: vicky (aka key or wkey)
Pronouns: she/her
Birthday (no year): jan 6
Where are you from? What is your time zone? french canadian. west coast best coast. pst.
Roleplay experience: idk since i was like 7? running around the neighbourhood w the boyz and gming our own little world of makebelieve… writing/online-wise, since around the age of 10-11 when we got a puter in the living room.
Got any pets? black kitty called cabbage i fostered and then adopted. she's no thoughts head empty and that's why she won over my other 16 foster cats. /hj
Favorite time of year: autumn-ish or spring. don't do well in the heat but sad makes winter bad.
Some interests and things you like: comics&webtoons, puzzle games (picross, sudoku, etc), ultimate frisbee, tennis, hiking, traveling
Some funfacts & trivia about you:
-prefer crepes to pancakes
-don't leave me alone with a box of ice cream sandwiches for the love of-
-past key has cumulatively drawn 500+ comic pages over the years (and misses it dearly)
-used to play ice hockey, played for bout 12 years. stopped due to injuries.
What non-Fire Emblem games do you play? ffxiv, zelda, tales of, undertale
Favorite Pokemon type & Pokemon: ghost, haunter
How did you get into Fire Emblem? smash bros /j i think my bro acquired a copy of fe7 and the rest is history
What Fire Emblem games have you played? 6 through current
First Fire Emblem game: 7
Favorite Fire Emblem game: hrkkk probably 7 but super fond of sacred stones n path of radiance too
Any Fire Emblem crushes? 😳
lmao
If you’ve played the following games, who was your first S support? Who would you S support nowadays?
- Awakening: mightve been chrom by accident n woulda been pissed about it. henry & gaius beloveds
- Fates: conquest- niles, birthright- azama, revelations- kaze
- Three Houses: was it claude or felix? idk but claude is def why i started w deer haha
- Engage: louis and lapis i married both that's my story and im sticking to it
Favorite Fire Emblem class: thief or mage
If you were a Fire Emblem character, what would be your class? probably an archer, or mage. miss me w close combat
If you were a Three Houses character, what would be your affiliation? hmm… i wanna say deer but probably beagles
If you were an Engage character, which Emblem would you Engage with? lyn. long distance pew pew goes brrrrr
How did you find TOA? kept seeing it on twitter from ol ferp mutuals and eventually caved
Current TOA muses: hector, matthew, azama
Who was your first TOA muse? If you don’t have them anymore, could you see yourself picking them up again? ewan. some days i think i could.
Have you had any other TOA muses? florina, henry
Do you think you have a type of character you gravitate towards? prickly, maybe. in general muses that allow me to explore… ewan is more outgoing than i will ever be, but lets himself feel petty or jealous. hector is brash, but struggling with an uncomfortable and unexpected weight on his shoulders. azama invites conflict like he needs it to breathe, while ive typically been averse to conflict. florina is timid but trying to grow stronger for her friends (and herself, she comes to realize). henry is… an oddball, idk how to describe what draws me to writing him. change of pace maybe? requires thinking outside the box with his unique worldview. i dont tend toward angst but matthew is a good output for it if im feelin it haha.
What do you believe you enjoy writing the most? i think i like. when threads start to come together. yknow in stories when you can start referring to things that have happened? and you're like "woah wait i know what that's referring to!!"
when you manage to reach a shared history ig? i know im p slow re. writing but i cherish the bonds and overarching/intertwined stories my muses wind up with. people you meet touch your life in ways you might not immediately fathom…
Favorite TOA-related memory: lots of lock & key justice shenanigans… bunker … enjoyed unscripted a whole heck of a lot as well
How do you pronounce TOA? 🤔 T-O-A. sounds fancier to spell it out haha
Got any delusions that didn’t see the light of day that you’d like to share? 😉 felix, ike, kaze, serra, sain, naesala, ingrid, eldigan, bramimond, lethe, shinon, kliff… not so much delusions as "might be fun to explore…" – and i wouldn't trade our current reps of the above for the world ✌️
#munday#arrives a day late w starbucks#the formatting is so scuffed *shakes moblr*#thanks neffi for the meme
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Hello, I am trying to send this ask with as much respect as possible, I have tried doing research on my own but I find it very difficult but I do know a fair bit
Tw: medical experiences, unwanted hormones
My doctors say that I have “higher testosterone than expected from a woman” and by that they mean a dyadic cis woman, I am a pre-transition trans man, and I have incredibly painful periods that they “can’t do anything about” except put me on estrogen or painkillers, and I have slightly under developed breasts I think because they don’t look like most cis women’s, and I am constantly slightly anemic and I can’t seem to become un-anemic no matter how much I try, but they say that it’s not significant enough to impact my transition and I don’t think it shows up a lot physically, I don’t have a lot of facial hair or an especially deep voice but it does break a lot, but I do have a very high hairline and I think my hair might be getting thinner but Im unsure?
I feel out of control of my body and like doctors will not help me but maybe what I perceive as problems will go away when I transition and there will be no breasts or periods? I don’t even know if I want to call myself intersex because I don’t want to step on intersex people’s toes but on the other hand maybe it would be a good thing because strength in numbers? How do I figure out what is happening with my body and how to care for it when doctors will just not want to talk about it or say they can’t help me?
Hi anon, sorry that it took a while to answer.
I'm so sorry to hear that doctors have been so unhelpful. You deserve to have doctors that help you figure this out and to go on the hormones that you want to go on. If doctors have told you that you have higher testosterone (hyperandrogenism), that probably means that you are intersex. Doctors rarely ever actually use the word "intersex" when they are diagnosing people, so it kind of takes a lot of doing our own figuring out. When people are diagnosed with hyperandrogenism, usually the cause is PCOS or NCAH if things like Cushing syndrome have been ruled out. There are specific tests for NCAH if that is something you would be interested in exploring.
I don't think you would be stepping on intersex people's toes if you identified as intersex, intersex questioning, or went into intersex community spaces. As long as you are honest with where you are in your journey and don't speak over other people, I've found the intersex community to be really welcoming. The things you've shared are things that a lot of intersex people can relate to, and you deserve support and understanding. I think you would be welcome in intersex community. Intersex community has room for all of us, and we all have different experiences, variations, diagnoses--we have space to support each other without talking over each others experiences. You belong here if you want to belong here, but you also have the room to use whatever language feels most comfortable. There is no rush, and you don't have to move at a pace that feels too fast when it comes to understanding yourself, your body, and the language that you use.
I also had some similar symptoms and going on testosterone did really help me (still didn't get rid of my weird anemia and I'm still trying to figure that out, I know a lot of intersex people with weird anemia issues that none of us have figured out why.) I say that not to minimize what you're currently going through but to let you know that there is hope that things will get easier with your body. I know for a lot of intersex people, being on some type of consistent hormone helps us a lot, whether we are on estrogen HRT, testosterone HRT, or progestin like through an IUD or otherwise. Intersex people are still intersex no matter what hormones we take, but hormones can be an important option for managing our health. You might need to work with your doctor to figure out the best dosages and it might take a bit of trial and error to manage your hormonal health, but it can get better.
Doctors suck so bad, but know that you are not alone and you deserve to be listened to. You can check out this post for tips on advocating for yourself at the doctors. This is also a brochure you can print out and give to your doctor if that's something you are comfortable with. If you want to talk to other intersex people about your experiences, feel free to send an ask off anon and I can give you a link to an intersex discord server. There's also ISpace, an intersex facebook group, if that's something that you would like.
Truly the best of luck, anon <3
-Mod E
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NSFW Alphabet (N-Z)
Part 1 | Part 2
The Falcon and The Winter Soldier
Pairing: Sam Wilson x Female! Reader
Summary: A-Z of just smut (and some fluff).
Word Count: 1324
Warnings: NSFW, 18+, minors DNI, unprotected vaginal sex, oral (male/female receiving), masturbation (male/female), overstimulation, creampie, multiple orgasms, teasing, slight spanking, sex toys, cursing, language, mention of bodily fluids.
Authors Note: POSTING IN 2 PARTS! Because Tumblr won’t let you have more than 250 text blocks. Happy Birthday to Sam! I love how this turned out and I hope you all do too! Enjoy loves <3
Main Masterlist | Sam Wilson Masterlist
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Credit @ chrishemsworht for the wonderful gif
N = No (something they wouldn’t do, turn offs)
He would never ever do something that would hurt you in any way, shape, or form.
He had told you countless times that if there ever was something you weren’t comfortable with in bed or something was hurting that you speak immediately.
O = Oral (preference in giving or receiving, skill, etc.)
That man could live between your thighs if he had the chance. At every opportunity, he would search for your core to nuzzle his face in it and bring you earth-shattering after earth-shattering orgasm with his master tongue.
Sam was close to bringing you to a third orgasm in some random room at the party the two of you were attending.
His mouth was sinful as he sucked on your raw and abused clit for how long you didn't know. You lost track of time how long you've been spread out for him on some random surface as he was on his knees. The short dress you were wearing made it easy for him to have access to all of you.
“I-I don't th-think I can d-do one mo-more baby.”
“Just one more. Just one more for me.”
“Shouldn't we go back to the party? People must wonder where we are.”
“I don't care. I don't like the food there. This here is much better. Now cum for me one last time.”
He wouldn’t say no to an offer from you in sucking him off. He just wishes sometimes you would have picked a more appropriate time to do so.
“Her? Now?” Sam questioned as you were on your knees trying to undo his pants. The two of you were at a party, and you had gotten the sudden urge to feel him on your tongue, so desperate to taste him.
You had pushed him into some random small broom closet. The crowns of people outside having no idea what was going on just a few meters from them.
“Yes now. Do you not want me to?” You asked innocently as you grabbed his dick through his underwear. “N-no, I want to. Please keep going… fuck.”
P = Pace (are they fast and rough? slow and sensual? etc.)
If he’s been angry and frustrated that day, it’ll be more rough than usual. You could feel him take that little bit of frustration out on your body as he fucked you hard and fast from behind.
Not that you mind. It was terrible to admit, but you loved those times when he got home from his day a little angrier. Your thighs clenching together in knowledge that he would handle you roughly in bed.
Your head was buzzing as Sam fucked you into oblivion from behind. He had gotten home frustrated and in desperate need to release some steam. Your hands were gripping the sheets tightly in your palms to keep you grounded from his abusive thrusts.
His palm continuously left harsh slaps on your ass cheeks as he fucked you deeply into the mattress.
It didn't take long for both of you to release. His hands held a tight grip on your hips as he fucked you just a tad longer after the orgasm.
Q = Quickie (their opinions on quickies, how often, etc.)
If there really isn’t time for foreplay and exploring each other, he has nothing against a quickie if one of you is in a rush.
“We don’t have time for this Y/N! We need to leave in 10 minutes.”
“10 minutes is more than enough, Sam! We just need to be very quick.”
The rush to get his pants down as well as your underwear under the dress down was immense as you only had a few minutes to bring each other pleasure before you had to leave for the fancy gala both of you were attending.
R = Risk (are they game to experiment? do they take risks? etc.)
He’s up for exploring new possibilities in bed if that’s what you want.
New positions, maybe some toys that could be used to enhance both of your pleasures.
If you were game, he was as well.
S = Stamina (how many rounds can they go for? how long do they last?)
You have sex almost every day. That man can last as long as he wants and is good to go for 2-3 rounds. You don't understand how in the fuck he does it. It's like a secret superpower he has. He mainly uses it to his advantage when he wants to tease you to the fullest.
T = Toys (do they own toys? do they use them? on a partner or themselves?)
There won’t be that many toys that are used. Sam always says that his mouth, hands, and dick are the only toys that are needed in the bedroom.
Once in a while, he will ask you to fuck yourself with the dildo in your drawer while he watches intensely.
“Please, Sam, can you just come and touch me?” The drive of the toy inside yourself was good, but it would never please you in the same way Sam did.
“No, no. I want to watch. You’ll get me later. Now show me what you do to yourself when I’m not at home.”
U = Unfair (how much they like to tease)
There is teasing to some degree, but he mostly wants to get right on.
But those few times he does actually want to tease you, he’ll take his sweet time in doing so, driving you absolutely insane with need.
“No… please,” the pathetic plea for him not to deny your orgasm again was bringing a smirk to his expression.
“Shhh… I’m not done with you yet,” he said as his fingers were inserted in you once again to build you up. Was he going to allow you to let go this time? That would be left to see when the time came.
V = Volume (how loud they are, what sounds they make, etc.)
He can be loud at times, but mostly he’ll just let out grunts and moans of your name on a repeated loop. It became more evident just as he’s about to finish inside of you.
W = Wild card (a random headcanon for the character)
Sam loves drawn-out foreplay when he has plenty of time to spare.
He takes good care in preparing you and making you cum at least once before he’s even put his dick in you.
X = X-ray (let’s see what’s going on under those clothes)
Have you seen how he walks? He’s thick and long, and he knows how to make you absolutely crazy with it. The way he holds himself just screams big dick energy.
You’ve been together for years, but you still can’t get used to his length inside of you, and you doubt you ever will.
Y = Yearning (how high is their sex drive?)
He’s always ready if you are. He’s not joking when he says he wants you 24/7, 365 days.
Even when the two of you are tired but still horny for one another, you will find a way to pleasure each other.
The two of you were laying on your sides, Sam’s chest pressed tightly against your back as his dick was driving itself in and out of your tightness.
It was early in the morning. The two of you were as tired as could be but the need to feel each other was intense.
It wouldn’t be long until the two of you released all over each other. On the bright morning, none of you would be able to hold on for long.
Z = Zzz (how quickly they fall asleep afterwards)
He always takes care of you before his eyes close for sleep. Washing you, cuddling you, running a bath for the two of you to relax in.
He can’t sleep unless he knows you have been appropriately taken care of.
“Good night, sweet girl. I love you.”
Part 1 HERE
Credit @ firefly-graphics for the wonderful divider
Thank you for reading <3 Feedback through a comment is highly appreciated if you liked it! As well as a reblog to share it with others!
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Marvel Taglist: @whothehellisbuckybarnes @phoenixhalliwell @x-goddess-of-nature-x @trulysuccubus @skyesthebomb @whoreforsamwilson @natashadeservedbetter @beth-winchester21 @mrs-salvawhore @soldierstucky @missswritings @sariche @claudiaatje @myakai13 @paintballkid711 @ttalisa @teti-menchon0604 @J-e-nster @-im-fantastic- @donut-crazs @tatestripedsweater @feetoffthetablee @uraesthete @mae-black @midnightdragonzero @julia2000love @yvngzxx @midnightzonzz @kaystacks17 @missroro @living-that-best-life @alwaysclassyeagle
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#justsamwilson#marvel#marvel x reader#marvel x y/n#marvel x you#marvel fanfiction#marvel fandom#marvel female reader insert#marvel fic#marvel family#marvel fluff#marvel smut#marvel imagine#marvel one shot#sam wilson#sam wilson x reader#sam wilson x y/n#sam wilson x you#sam wilson fluff#sam wilson smut#sam wilson imagine#sam wilson one shot#anthony mackie#marveldiaries writes#tfatws#tfatws x reader#tfatws smut#tfatws imagine#tfatws oneshot
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Hello! Do you mind if i ask you for some advice? Im just really anxious about something. So, i am a university student who will start going to offline classes around next month. My university is in another city, which is a 5 hour drive from my current home, so naturally i have to stay at a place somewhere in that city. The thing is, im scared and anxious about moving out of my parents' house. The idea of living alone surrounded by strangers is just so scary to me. I just feel so anxious and i dont know what to do. I knew that sooner or later i will have to move out, but im just really worried about myself. All my life i have never slept alone. I always have my siblings as a roommate. I feel so safe being with my family, but i have to move out for my offline classes. I am scared and anxious. Please help me :(
Hi, friend. I'm not sure quite when I got this, so hopefully it's not too late of a response. I understand the feelings you described, though; it sounds a lot like how I felt when I went to college. It was about 3-4 hours from my hometown, I'd always been scared of change and pretty introverted, and the idea of being away from my family was terrifying.
My first weekend away, I was so anxious that I couldn't even go to get food; I just ate pop-tarts in my room and organized my things to try to keep busy. The first month, probably even the whole first semester, I called my mom all the time and went home every possible opportunity.
The things that helped me were finding friends, establishing a routine, making my space comfortable and secure, and letting myself call home whenever I needed to. I think letting yourself adjust at your own pace is so important, and recognizing that it's okay to not be independent all at once. It's also important to take little opportunities to be brave. Actually check out clubs and organizations that interest you, try some events, and let yourself be in situations where contact with other students will happen. It doesn't have to be a party or anything wild; it can be just spending some time in the student union or a common area of your dorm, going to some club meetings, or making some conversation with people in your classes. You'll start to gravitate to new friends, and that helps so much with the entire experience.
Try to decorate your room (or your half of the room, if you're sharing). Make sure you have a comfortable place that you like to be in, that you can feel secure in. Have some familiar things from home, use the same laundry detergent your family uses, little things like that can help settle you a bit. If you have a roommate, try to make sure you're on the same page about things like guests, always locking the door, respecting each other's space and such. Maybe you'll be friends, if you get along well enough. That definitely helps, to be in a good place with a roommate.
I know it's incredibly scary, the huge change of going off to university, but you'll start to adjust, and the anxiety will start to abate, and things will start to become more familiar and comfortable. It takes some time, but doing little things to feel secure and safe will help you get there, as well as finding opportunities to make friends. And remember that it's okay to call home as much as you need to.
Best of luck to you at university! <3
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one last time part 2
IM BACK! thought i’d celebrate with finally uploading one last time part 2! also..i physically couldn’t write this without putting some angst in there i apologize but there is a happy ending because it’s what y/n DESERVES!
you can read ONE LAST TIME PART ONE here!
Warnings: lack of communication lol, angst, smut, happy ending
~~~~~~~~~~
They hadn’t woken up with Harry still in bed in a long time, Y/N had missed it. A lot.
His head lay on the pillow, face smushed into it. His eyes were closed and he was snoring softly. Y/N couldn’t help but smile, she loved him.
But if they were gonna be distant with each other, what was the point of marriage? It was a heartbreaking thought that their love wasn’t strong enough to withstand not even two years before it was over.
She carefully lifted her hand, tracing her fingertips over his forehead, down the side of his face, and lightly running her fingers over his pouty lips. He twitched a little and it made her heart jump. She didn’t want him to wake up yet, didn’t want him to realize what was happening and then leave. No, she wanted him here, right here. For as long as she could have him. Because right now, he was still her husband. He was still the husband that loved her and wanted to spend time with her. Not the husband who didn’t really act like one anymore, the one always avoiding her at all costs. And it hurt, it hurt like a bitch to think that the man who she loved with her entire mind body and soul might not even love her anymore.
She admired him, she didn’t know for how long. All she knew was that the sky was dark when she woke, to it now shining bright in the sky, the birds outside chirping noisily into the air.
It started with his eye twitching, his breathing changed, his eyes peeked open, then closing again once the light hit them. He groaned out, raising his arm to cover his eyes.
Y/N couldn’t stop watching him, she should feel like a creep but this was her husband. For now, at least. The thought made her frown.
He recovered, uncovering his eyes and peering at her. She watched as his eyes widened a bit at the sight of her, and her heart broke a little.
“Shit, what time is it?” Y/N gulped and looked at her bedside table to where the alarm clock is, reading 9:53 am and reciting it back to him.
“Fuck, I was s’posed to be at the studio at 9. Jeff’s gonna kill me.” Y/N stayed silent as he quickly got off the bed, running to their shared closet and changing quickly, then running to their bathroom and closing it.
Y/N didn’t even notice the tear slipping down her face until it landed on her lips. She quickly wiped it and decided to get up as well, making their bed where they had made love for the last time last night.
She had to call up a divorce lawyer, schedule a meeting. File for a divorce, draft up the divorce papers. Gather herself and her emotions. Text her best friend for emotional support. This was all a new experience for her, and she was scared as hell. The last thing she wanted to do was end their marriage, but if he wasn’t happy, then she wasn’t happy either.
The bathroom door opened and he was looking around the room for something.
“Y/N have you seen my keys?”
“Have you checked the pants you were wearing yesterday?” She remembered unbuttoning those pants, pulling them down and having her way with him. This was getting too much for her.
“Ah, thanks, love.” Y/N sighed, placing the throw pillows in the right places and checking her phone for messages.
“I’ll be at the studio late tonight. Don’t wait up.” And then he was off, like yesterday never happened. And when she heard the front door slam shut she let the tears loose. She sobbed and sobbed into the throw pillow she just placed down, crying hard at the thought of losing him.
Still crying, she called her best friend to come over. Her best friend was shocked and scared that she was full on sobbing at 10 am, but she was too worried to question her. She raced to Y/N’s and Harry’s home, using her spare key to get in. Her heart broke at the mess Y/N was in. She knew about her and Harry’s distance but it never got this bad for Y/N.
“Can you find me a divorce lawyer?”
~~~
Vera Thomson was a top notch divorce attorney. Y/N’s best friend knew of her from her sister who had divorced her ex husband, and Vera made the process super easy for her.
Y/N tried to compose herself when her best friend was on the phone with Vera, but she broke again when she heard that she was free at 1 pm to discuss the details. Y/N didn’t want to meet up with her this soon, she didn’t want her marriage to end with the love of her life this soon. She kind of hoped for a delay in it, that it wouldn’t be this fucking easy.
“I-I can’t do this!” Her best friend sighed and wrapped her arms around Y/N, rubbing her hand up and down her back.
Between Y/N’s loud cries and the shushes from her best friend, they both didn’t hear the front door opening and closing. They also didn’t hear the footsteps climbing up the stairs and stopping outside their bedroom door.
“P-please, this can’t just be it!”
“Shh, Y/N, it’s alright. It will be okay. I’m here for you, we’re all here for you.”
Outside their open bedroom door, Harry stood in utter confusion at hearing Y/N’s cries. He wanted to go in but somewhere in his mind he knew he was a reason for her tears. It broke Harry apart each heart wrenching sob she let out. He wanted to go in and comfort his love, but for some reason he couldn’t move his feet.
When Y/N composed herself to utter a few sentences, Harry’s entire world stopped. He almost fell to his knees at her words.
“Do you really think divorce is the best option? S-should I at least wait a few more days until meeting with her? Or, or should I just get it over with today? How long does divorce papers take to draft? I’m so scared, I don’t wanna do it.”
She wanted a divorce? She was meeting with a divorce lawyer to draft the papers? He didn’t want what he was hearing to be true, they were okay.. Weren’t they? Yeah, he’s been super busy writing his next album, but she had to know she was the most important thing to him, right? He loved her with all of his heart, he never wanted her to feel like this, to the point of heartbreak and tears. He vowed to always make her feel special, and to always be there for her and to always spend time with her. Was he really the one making her feel like this?
Sure, he’d been coming home later than usual, spending long hours everywhere he got an ounce of inspiration for a new song. He’d be at the studio perfecting one song, then starting the next. But he didn’t know she felt this way. Was she that unhappy?
Holy fuck- he suddenly remembered her words from yesterday. “One last time, H. Please.”
“She’s a popular attorney, Y/N. I don’t know when the next meeting will be, you’re lucky she had room for you today.”
Y/N scoffed. She was lucky? She didn’t think she was lucky that she was getting divorced to her husband.
“Sorry, bad choice of words. Look, if you’re having second thoughts, I can cancel for you. Take all the time you need, you don’t have to rush, Y/N. This is a big decision, and maybe you should talk to him first? Maybe this doesn’t have to be an option? Maybe marriage counseling..?”
“No..” Y/N shook her head in disagreement.
“Marriages shouldn’t need counseling. If we were meant to last together, we don’t need counseling to dig into why we are unhappy in this marriage. Besides, this is for him. He’s the one unhappy, and if he’s unhappy, I am.”
Harry couldn’t take it anymore. He entered the room, both Y/N and her best friends heads looking up and eyes wide and frozen at the sight of him.
“What are you talking about, Y/N? You think I’m unhappy in this marriage?”
“Harry-“ Y/N started cautiously, not knowing how much he heard but he would of had to hear her last sentences if he was reacting like this.
“No, Y/N! I love you so fucking much, and to think I was ever unhappy in this relationship is utter bullshit.”
He was so worked up, so emotional, he was pacing the room trying to form words to explain his thoughts. His thoughts that were running wild, he was scared. He was scared that he would lose her, lose his precious Y/N. His darling who meant the whole universe and more to him.
He was mad also. Mad that she ever thought he was unhappy. Mad at himself for making her think he was unhappy. Mad at the both of them for not communicating their feelings properly. Mad that she would’ve given up this easily.
“H.. please. We both know you’re unhappy in this marriage. Is this not what you want?” Y/N saw the tears running down his face and she blanched, feeling awful for making him cry. She honestly thought she was doing the right thing, but maybe it was the fear. The fear that he no longer wanted her, that he had the ability to find prettier women. She was insecure, but fuck how can she not be? Her conflicting emotions must’ve shown in her face before her best friend rubbed her back and told her she was going to go.
Y/N nodded absentmindedly while staring at Harry. She made the decision to carefully approach him, what she wasn’t expecting was for him to fall to his knees before her.
“Don’t leave me, baby, please don’t leave me.” He cried out, Y/N’s heart wrenching in pain at the sight.
“I’m not, H. I’m sorry, I’m so sorry.” She fell to her knees with him, hugging his body close to her, so tight but she didn’t care. She sighed in relief.
He pulled back. “I- I remember you saying ‘one last time’ last night.. I thought nothing of it, but you were planning to leave me last night?” Y/N felt she was on an emotional roller coaster. She realized how wrong she had been in not communicating with him before taking a big step, calling a divorce lawyer. She should have talked to him about her feelings. Communication is key. They both knew that, so why had they both been quiet?
“I never want you to leave me, baby, never. You’re my heart, my soul, my everything. W-were supposed to start a family, grow old together, baby, tell me why you wanted to divorce me? Please?” They were both full on sobbing at this point. Y/N paused for a few seconds to think of her words.
“I never want to leave you, never want you to go either. We’ll be okay, H, okay?” Y/N cradled his face with her hands and traced his cheekbone, pressing warm kisses all around his face, and wiped away his tears.
“I’m sorry for assuming, I was just scared it was true, that you didn’t want me anymore.” She whispered. Harry’s face showed love and compassion as he kissed her lips, shoving into it warmth and passion and love and care.
“I need you, baby.” Harry murmurs against her lips, the kiss soon turning passionate and taking them to another level.
“Mmm, then have me.” Sexual intimacy was a big part of one’s relationship, and thank God their’s was out of this world. He worshipped her body and in return she worshipped his, they knew each other’s likes and dislikes and was not afraid to push one’s boundaries a little bit further. They were comfortable with each other, but in a good way that there were still more things to learn.
Her words ignited a spark in him—show her she’s the only one for you, show her you’ll never leave her— and that’s what he intended to do. Harry slowly brought them up, gripping her waist and pulled her up, bringing her body to the bed and depositing her there.
Eyes alight with excitement and lust, he prowled toward her.
“I can’t take it slow baby.” Harry heard her words but didn’t pay them no mind. He wanted to bring her to new heights that she hadn’t felt before with him.
Y/N tried to undress him but he pushed his hoodie back down and pinned her wrists to the bed. “Lay back and relax, baby, this is all about you.” Y/N gulped at the fire in his eyes and nodded, laying back and letting him take over.
He traced her body with his hands, not letting a single surface go untouched, he pulled her sleep shirt off, marveling at the sight of her perky breasts and hard nipples. She gasped when he blew hot air onto her left one, not touching it. He did the same to her right.
“No teasing me, H.” He again didn’t reply but finally wrapped his lips around her nipple, she moaned and gripped his hair, bringing him closer to her. He switched to the other and swirled his tongue over it, sucking and playfully biting.
He pressed a trail of kisses down her body, stopping at the waistband of her pajama pants.
“Even in just nighties, you look divine.” Y/N blushed at his compliment and bashfully looked away.
The tug on her waistband prompted her to lift up her hips, Harry pulling them down and then she was just in her underwear.
He blew out a breath and bit his lip.
“God, I fucking love you.” She mumbled the words back and he looked up into her eyes and smiled. “I’m sorry for making you feel like you were second choice. You’ll always come first, always. Please talk to me if you ever have doubts.” She nodded sniffling as she felt tears well up in her eyes again.
“Promise.” Y/N whispered, and he grinned, wiping a tear away and then started kissing around her thighs, sucking on the skin.
After what seemed like forever, he pulled her underwear off, immediately licking up a stripe up her vagina.
“Oh!” She sat up, gripping his head as he swirled his tongue over her clit and devoured her like no tomorrow.
“Ah! Ah, shit, Harry!” She yelled out, lost in the invigorating pleasure he brought upon her body.
He got up, withdrawing from her body. She started to protest but he laid down beside her on their big bed.
“Sit on my face.” Wasting no time, she came over on top of him and slowly sat, feeling his tongue enter her in and out and all around. He sucked and nipped and kissed, she saw stars.
He knew her body so well, but no matter how many times she’s come on his face, he made her feel so special.
“So fucking wet, come all over my face baby.” He said into his pussy, and she gripped the bed sheets as she came, riding out her high and smashing his face in between her legs.
She gasped, nothing really coming out except a squeak. Her ears felt numb and as she was coming down from her high, she looked down.
The bed sheets were wet around his face and she sat up a bit, seeing how his face was dripping with liquid.
She gasped again in disbelief. “No!” Harry laughed brightly, excited about what just happened.
“Yes!” She had squirted all over him but she didn’t feel the least bit embarrassed.
“You did so good for me, lovie.”
“Can I undress you now?”
“You can do whatever you want, I’m yours to do as you please.” She loved to hear those words coming out of his mouth. She quickly tugged off his work Columbia hoodie, tugging up his shirt in the process, then taking off his white pants and socks, leaving him in his boxers.
His length was fully hard underneath the fabric, so large and she wanted him so bad. Last night felt like forever ago even though it was only hours ago.
“I love your dick, baby.” Y/N said, bringing his hand into his underwear and wrapping a warm fist around his hardness.
He jolted at the contact and moaned at the squeeze of her palm.
She tugged off his boxers to his knees, not having the patience to give him a handie or blowie, she needed him in her now.
She positioned herself above him and made eye contact with him while slowly sinking down onto him. They both moaned at the feeling. It was different than last night. It had a different vibe, it was off, but right now they were better, and it felt so good.
She bounced on him, watching his face until her eyes squeezed shut in pleasure. He brought her down to hold her as he took control for a minute and fucked up into her. She took it, a loud moaning mess above her husband.
“Fuck, you feel so damn good, mmm...” He gave her ass a firm slap, rubbing it after to soothe. She squeezed around him at the feeling, and it prompted Harry’s release.
“Shit— baby, I’m coming.” She flipped them around, knowing he likes it best when he is fucking into her and taking control when he comes. He pistons his hips a few times and then brings his thumb to his mouth quickly, wetting it with his saliva then bringing it down to her mound, rubbing it in circles. That brought her up and over the edge and she screamed and they moaned and came together.
He stays within her a few minutes. Watching her relaxed face. They caught their breaths, and finally pulled out, watching the cum drip from her gorgeous pussy.
“Baby Styles?” He grins down at her, coming to lay beside her and pulled her in so close they could hear the other’s heart beat.
She shrugs in his warm grasp, enjoying the idea of starting their family.
“Maybe..”
“I love you.” He whispered, pressing a kiss into her hair. She sighed happily, in her post orgasmic bliss, but also because of the man laying beside her, her husband.
“I love you..” They laid together, enjoying themselves in each other’s presence.
It wasn’t one last time, after all.
THE END.
#harry styles imagine#harry styles imagines#harry styles smut#harry styles angst#harry styles fluff#harry styles one shot#harry styles fanfic#harry styles fanfiction
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heather + hwang hyunjin
hello lovelies! (ﾉ◕ヮ◕)ﾉ*:･ﾟ✧ ✧ﾟ･: *ヽ(◕ヮ◕ヽ)
this is for anon who requested a scenario based on conan gray’s heather, and i decided to add a little twist to it (because im a big baby and i cant take the angst TT) hope you enjoy! <3
STREAM GOD’S MENU AND EASY.
You faltered as you tried to match Hyunjin's pace, your high heels making the task even more impossible aside from Hyunjin's long strides. "Fuck it," you huffed and stopped mid stride, leaning down to remove the straps of your shoes, finally sliding them off one after the other.
Hyunjin took notice of your absence and quickly looked back to where you were, your heels hanging from your hands as you were sauntering towards him barefoot. "What made you think that wearing heels is a good idea?" he questioned as he walked back to meet you halfway, turning his back to you and squatting down. "Get on my back," he offered.
"I wanted to impress you, maybe even get you to like me or look at me as something more than a friend," you mentally answered him. However, you couldn't risk to lose him, at least not over some one-sided feelings you've been sheltering within your heart for the past few months.
"You're going to regret this," you playfully taunted as you snaked your arms around Hyunjin's neck. He hooked his arm around your calves, asking you if you were comfortable before carefully standing up, bouncing you up a bit to slightly rearrange your hold on him. "Come on, (y/n). I do this for you all the time," Hyunjin joked.
"You had the time of your life at that party, huh?" Hyunjin spoke after a moment of silence. You let out a heavy sigh. "I wanted to forget someone for a moment," you replied softly, afraid that he would catch on the hurt laced within your tone. "Who?" he asked.
"You."
You've been friends with Hyunjin since diapers, basically you shared more than half of your memories and life experiences with him, even some of your firsts, which unfortunately included having your first love. Yeah, you'd date someone here and there, thinking that maybe venturing out into other men would help you get over your feelings for him, there was no harm in trying, right?
But boy were you wrong.
Instead of forgetting your crush on the said boy, it remained, worse, it got stronger. No matter how many times you tried to erase your fantasies of Hyunjin, your heart and mind were stubborn -- fixated on the thought of making your love life suffer for life because you couldn't see any other way around it.
You thought of confessing, but that didn't work out for you. Not that Hyunjin rejected you or anything, but you didn't even get the chance to pour your feelings out for the male because he introduced you to her that day.
Min Yeji, his heather.
"Hello? Earth to (y/n)?" Jeongin waved his hand in-front of your face, snapping you out of your thoughts. "What got you spacing out?" he asked, throwing an arm around your shoulder and rubbing them in a soothing manner. "I'm confessing today, Jeongin," you exhaled in an attempt to calm your nerves, "I'd rather tell him now than never."
"Listen, if hyung fails to see the beautiful person that you are inside and out, then to hell with him," Jeongin reassured. "I'll personally ask Chan-hyung to teach him a lesson if he chooses her over you," he added.
You gave him a small smile. "Thank you, Jeongin," you said.
You knew it was wrong, selfish even, for having him choose between you and her and for having to confess at such an ungodly timing. You wasted all those years trying to find him in someone else when you could've just spoken your truth. Now, you were left with fighting for a spot to stay. But you wanted to tell him everything before it's too late, before you fade away from his memories, before you get replaced.
And with that, you gave Hyunjin a call. He picked up after the second ring, greeting you and telling you that he was just about to call you as he had something that he really wanted to tell you in person too. So, you guys made plans to meet up in the afternoon at the coffee shop that the both of you frequented during the weekends.
You nervously fiddled with your fingers, growing more and more impatient as the seconds tick by, feeling as if you were about to burst any second now.
"(Y/n)!"
You perked up when you heard his voice, but your smile fell as he approached you.
Hyunjin had his arm around her waist, sporting the biggest smile, one that you've never seen on him. The sight of this Hyunjin was breathtaking, almost unrecognizable as his eyes molded into crescents and his lips curved into the most charming smile. Guess that was reserved for her, huh?
You swallowed the lump in your throat as tears threatened to spill from your eyes, but you held them in and managed to plaster a fake smile on your face, like those countless times when you needed to be strong, especially when you needed -- no, when you should be happy for Hyunjin.
"Hey," you spoke as you got up from your seat, clearing your throat seconds later as you internally cringed at how weak you sounded.
"Yeji," he turned to look at her, "Meet (y/n), my best friend," he continued as he turned his gaze towards you.
That was your first time meeting her in person, but not the first time you've heard about her. Hyunjin made it known, three weeks ago to be exact, that he had been eyeing a certain someone. You still remember that night. Hyunjin was sprawled out on your bed with his head on your stomach as you lazily threaded your fingers through his golden locks. He rambled endlessly, gushing over everything about her.
Yeji leaned in for a quick hug and you returned her sweet gesture. "It's so nice to finally meet you," she beamed. "Nice to meet you too," you replied, wanting to reciprocate the excitement in her tone but you failed. "Take a seat," you invited.
You were so set on hating her and despising her throughout that afternoon, but something in you couldn't. You now saw why Hyunjin fell for her. Yeji had kind eyes, a sweet smile, a lovely personality, and so much more of what you weren't. You wanted her to be mean, maybe to even throw a glass of water at you while Hyunjin excused himself to the bathroom, only to come back and see you soaked in water. He would defend you and leave her, then it would end with him confessing his love for you, admitting that he was so blind to see it before, but now he's changed his mind. You know, just like those dramas that you spent hours watching with Hyunjin.
As Hyunjin busied himself with Yeji, you were mostly by yourself, except those times wherein Jisung would suddenly barge into your apartment and plop himself down on your couch and insist on watching dramas with you. Although you appreciate Jisung's presence, it simply wasn't the same without Hyunjin. You were so used to him -- his presence, his smell, his laugh, and his dramatic antics. It was like you had to start over again, but this time, you were alone.
Reality hit you harder as time passed by.
"--so yeah, I'm basically waiting for Chan-hyung's approval-" Hyunjin's rant was cut off as soon as he spotted Yeji a few feet away, quickly getting up from his seat to help her with her books and bag. "Hey, (y/n)," she smiled, giving you a quick hug like always. "How was class?" you asked her, trying to make small talk as the couple settled down across from where you sat. It was only then that you noticed the sweater that she was wearing. You immediately figured that it was Hyunjin's, judging from the way it drowned her petite figure and Hyunjin might have offered you the same sweater a few winters back.
You felt a pang in your chest.
"It sucks, as usual," Yeji replied as she let out a defeated sigh. "I totally feel for you," you chuckled.
"I can do your essays for you," Hyunjin cooed at Yeji, leaning in to press a chaste kiss on her cheek. You were quick to divert your gaze to your phone, not wanting to witness the affection that Hyunjin displayed. "That's so sweet of you, Jinnie, but you have your own classes too," Yeji responded as she playfully pinched Hyunjin's cheek.
You cleared your throat as you got ready to leave because a) you didn't want to third wheel, especially when you had feelings for the said partner, and b) clearly, your presence wasn't needed. "Hey, uhm, something came up with Jisung and it looks like he needs my help," you lied. "Oh, alright. We'll see you later, (y/n)," Yeji waved and you returned her gesture. "Call me if you need anything," Hyunjin stated and you nodded.
You fought back the tears that threatened to fall from your eyes as you walked back towards your apartment. Upon your arrival, you drowned yourself with school work, not only did it distract you from your current situation, but it also aided in clearing your weekend so you could squeeze in more hours of much needed sleep.
For the next few days, you decided to distance yourself from Hyunjin. It hurts, but you needed to save yourself from further heartbreak. You no longer hung out with him, you started texting him less, and then eventually, you avoided any sort of contact with him.
"Have you seen (y/n) lately?" Hyunjin nudged Seungmin, who was currently immersed in the movie that was playing on his laptop. "Yeah, I just saw her this morning, why?" the younger lad answered. Hyunjin's suspicions were confirmed, you were indeed ignoring him. But no matter how much Hyunjin thought about your new found behavior, he couldn't rack his brain for an answer. Was it something he said or did?
He came up with nothing for the past hour or so, and that's what led him to give up and just call you. "Pick up, (y/n)," Hyunjin mumbled as he paced back and forth in his bedroom, groaning when you failed to answer his call.
This continued on for days.
"Hyunjin."
"Babe," Yeji called for the blond-haired boy's attention for the second time. "Huh?" Hyunjin snapped out from his thoughts, "Sorry, I was distracted for a second."
"It's (y/n), isn't it?" she asked. "Well, yeah. It's just that I haven't heard or seen her lately," Hyunjin answered as he lowered his gaze, thinking that his response would settle wrongly with his girlfriend. He shouldn't be worrying about another girl, especially within Yeji's presence. Hyunjin expected her to lash out, but to his surprise, Yeji gave him a small smile -- it wasn't exactly out of understanding his concerns, but more of getting tired hearing his concerns. She placed her hands on top of his, "I understand, she's your friend after all. But, you do know that my patience has a limit, right?"
"I'm sorry, love. Forget about it," Hyunjin waved his hands, a motion to discard his previous statements. "Chan-hyung is hosting a party this weekend and I want you to come with me," he invited, "The boys really want to meet you."
Yeji shook her head which earned her a puzzled look from the male. "Come on, it'll be fun," Hyunjin prompted.
"Jin, I'm not blind," Yeji snapped. Her response caught Hyunjin off guard for a second. "Look, baby, if this is about-"
"I see the way she looks at you, the way she acts around you, and the way she avoids my advances. I don't blame her, though. If I were in her shoes, I would've cut the bitch already," Yeji exclaimed as a defeated smile made its way on her lips. "But instead, she's trying to be so strong and you're so stupid to not see this. Hyunjin, you've been friends with her for years, you should know her better than anyone else, maybe even better than she knows herself," she continued, frustration evident in her tone.
"Go to her, she needs you," Yeji exhaled.
[Present..]
"Hyunjin, you can put me down now," you said as the both of you neared his parked car and the said male complied to your request, letting you land carefully on the ground.
"What do you mean by wanting to forget about me for a moment?" Hyunjin questioned, his eyebrows contorted in confusion as he faced you. "I just want to forget you, get you off my mind, even for a second," you breathed out, the amount of shots that you took at the party giving you enough courage to pursue this line of conversation with Hyunjin. You already lost him and yourself, so you have nothing else to lose at this point.
"(Y/n), what are you talking about?" Hyunjin chuckled lightly, "Come on, bub. You're my best friend," he added.
And that was your breaking point.
"Well, I don't want to be your best friend anymore, Hyunjin!" you exclaimed. "I'm tired of being second best," you sobbed as you finally allowed your tears to fall. Hyunjin's smile immediately fell and his eyes widened at your sudden breakdown, you looked so hurt, betrayed -- you looked broken.
"Second best?"
"Yeah, just like how I was tonight, right?" you snapped as you flashed him a sarcastic smile. "Since Yeji couldn't make it tonight, you were left with the me," you retorted.
Hyunjin didn't respond because honestly, he didn't know how to.
"I tried, Hyunjin," you paused, "Believe me, I tried to get over you but I can't. I'm so in love with you. I tried to blame Yeji for all of this but how can I when she's been nothing but nice to me, she treats me like a sister."
"I wish I didn't wait that long, I wish I told you sooner," you continued.
"I'm sorry," Hyujin whispered. You shook your head as held your hand up to signal him to stop. "Don't apologize so that I can hate you."
You turned away from him, not wanting his eyes on you any longer. "I need to let you go, Hyunjin," you sniffed through your tears. You started walking away, still barefoot, but you didn't even bother at this point. Hyunjin's hand caught your wrist, "I'm not leaving you, at least not like this. Let me make this right, (y/n)."
"No, Hyunjin, please," you breathed out as you tried to free your wrist from Hyunjin's grasp. "I told you I'm not leaving you," Hyunjin argued, tugging you towards him and catching you in his embrace. He wrapped his arms around you, tightening his hold on you when you tried to push him off. "Shh, bub. It's okay, I'm not going anywhere," he spoke in a hushed tone and you hated the way it soothed you, causing you to lose your strength as you eventually gave into his touch.
Hyunjin gently stroked your hair as he whispered sweet nothings into your ear. He waited until your breathing evened out and soon later, he led you back to his car. "I'm driving you home, then we'll talk," he said.
The drive to your apartment was dead silent. A million thoughts raced through your mind as you looked out from the car's window. Now that you've sobered up, you felt stupid for acting out. Did you honestly think that throwing a tantrum would make Hyunjin dump Yeji? No, you didn't think so.
"Why didn't you tell me anything?" Hyunjin asked, his voice barely above a whisper. He sat next to you as he handed you a glass of water. "I never had the chance. I was supposed to tell you that afternoon when you introduced me to Yeji," you confessed, taking the glass of water he handed you. "Did it ever cross your mind that it was unfair for me too?" Hyunjin suggested.
"I'm not making you choose, Hyunjin," you sighed. "I know you love her, I don't want to rob you of your own happiness. That's why I'm the one who's walking away," you added as you sipped on the drink, setting it down on the coffee table and placing your hands back on your lap.
The blonde-haired male shook his head in disagreement as he moved down to kneel in-front of you, his hands tentatively coming up to lay on your knees. "Can I at least have a say in this?" he asked. You bit your lip and gestured for him to continue.
"You're right, I do love Yeji," he paused, taking a moment to form the right words. "But, I love you more, (y/n). I don't want you in pain because of me and it's killing me right now to see you like this," he added as a tear escaped his eye, recalling the state you were in a couple of hours ago, but he was quick to wipe them away. "You could've slapped me that day, called me an asshole, or something," he said, "I'll choose you over anybody, any day. I'm sorry it took so long for me to realize."
You were left speechless, uncertain of what your response should be, so you opted to stay silent.
"Yeji actually knew this was coming, maybe not right away, but at some point. I didn't believe her when she told me you had feelings for me. She told me she felt it the moment she met you in person," he explained, "So, we thought it would be the best to part ways and that's why she didn't come with tonight."
"I'm sorry," you muttered, keeping your eyes on your lap, finding a sudden interest towards the hem of your dress as you fiddled with it. "No, baby, don't be," Hyunjin replied, tucking a loose strand of your hair behind your ear. "I guess what they say is true, huh? You never appreciate what you have until you lose it," he admitted.
Finally, you mustered the courage to meet his gaze. "You'll always have me," you said. "Good, 'cause you'll always have me too," Hyunjin gave you a small smile. You pulled him up from his position, guiding him to sit beside you. Once Hyunjin was seated, you wrapped your arms around him, burying your face into his dress shirt. His scent quickly filled your senses, making you feel at home and protected, a feeling you hadn't had in a while.
"Let me make this right, yeah?" Hyunjin spoke as he held you close, one hand patting your head gently and the other rubbing the small of your back. "Yeah, okay," you agreed.
"She may be Heather, but you're (y/n), my (y/n)."
#stray kids#stray kids angst#skz imagines#stray kids imagines#stray kids scenarios#stray kids x reader#skz scenarios#hyunjin#hyunjin scenarios#hyunjin imagines#hyunjin angst#bang chan scenarios#bang chan imagines#lee know scenarios#lee know imagines#seungmin scenarios#seungmin imagines#felix scenarios#felix imagines#han scenarios#han imagines#changbin scenarios#changbin imagines#i.n scenarios#i.n imagines#hwang hyunjin#kpop scenarios#kpop imagines
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How to obey me brother and side character have sex
Authors note : im going to be splitting these up into the oldest brother , youngest and then the side character other then Luke of course he’s a baby 😌
Lucifer
Are they loud or quiet when having sex do they like it loud
Lucifer is pretty quiet when having sex
He my grunt or let out a quiet moun but don’t except him to be louder then lay
He prefers you being loud to him it bust his ego a bit and he likes to think it helps make sure people now your his little human
After care are they good at it or are you cleaning up ?
This man is the kings of after care
He runs you a hot bath and he might get in with you he might not
He’ll Cary you like a princess to wherever you might need to be
He’ll take you to the bath room if your legs hurt to mutch
And after he makes sure that’s all down he is going to either hold you till you sleep and the go do his work or cuddle and sleep with you
What’s the pace are they slow or fast in bed ?
Lucifer pretty fast but he keeps a middle pace
But if he feels in the mood to teas then he’ll go horribly slow
He normally will set the pass based on how tired he is and how mutch time he has to stay with you to have sex
If he needs to rush then he’s going fast but if it’s his free day off he takes his sweet time to play with you
Rounds how many do they normally do and how do they feel about quickes
Lucifer can do anywhere for one round to six like stated he bases it of his free time and he’s good no matter how many round you go
He is perfectly fine with quickes , don’t got him round he’s a man of class but if he wants you and he only has so mutch time he’ll take you
And daer god this man loves for play and that’s added to any round he does
Oral how do they feel about it and do they prefer giving or receiving
He doesn’t really care either way
Giving he likes because he gets to make you feel good and hear your sweet noises
Receiving he likes because he can look at you and all that your doing and he can Tease you easily from where you are
So either way neither of you is going to get disappointed by the results
Favorite position
 Lucifer favorite position is when your favoring him on his lap
But he’s also a fan of in tables
He likes when you face home because then he access to all your neck and he can see all your experience and how good he makes you feel 
And for over tables well one it makes it was easier to pull your hair pluse he can hold you hips still
But he’s open to most position If you want to try something now
What are they ok with and what aren’t they ok with
He will never fucking be a bottom or let you peg him
He is terrified of the idea of hurting you so he won’t do mutch more the hair pulling and even then he’s very careful
Anything that involves sharing you or having to be around other people when he’s having sex
Sizes how big are they
 Lucifer is assumed to be the second biggest of the brothers
He is above average sitting at a nice size of 7 inches
 Mammon
Are they loud or quiet when having sex do they like it loud
Mammon medium when it’s comes to noise
He willlet out some quiet mouns he’ll let out some loud ones to he also Cusses alone when having sex
And dear god yes he loves when your loud he wants you to screem his name from the rooftops
He want everyone to know that your his and no one else can have you
after care are they good at it or are you cleaning up
Hes not the beast don’t get me Wrong he tries he very best to help but at that ppoint he’s a blushing mess
He will help clean and after your done taking a shower or bath he’ll cuddle you
But past that he doesn’t know what to do past that
 what’s the pace are they slow or are they fast
Mammon pace is a true Medium for pass
He dose sometime panic or get worked up and either speeds up or slows down
But he’s normally good at staying at the medium pace
Rounds how many do they normally do and how do they feel about quickes
He can normally do up to 7 to 6 rounds but it can change on how he feels
And no he can not to a quickie that is way to spontaneous for are shy boy
He would mad panic if you and him tried
But other wise he’s good with lots of rounds
 Oral how do they feel about it and do they prefer giving or receiving
Mammon mutch prefers receiving oral
For the main reason that it kinda scars him to try what if he hurts you
So he’d rather receive it then give it and it really helps him feel like you care for him
 Favorite position
He likes cow girl and stuff like
And he dose manly dose missionary
Just because it makes him feel comfortable
 What are they ok with and what aren’t they ok with
He is so scared to hurt you he’s never bin with anyone none the less a human
So he doesn’t want to choke you or anything else around those lines
He him self is also a very shy boy and has to try very had not to lose his cool
So try not to overstimulated him
Unlike Lucifer Mammon is way more likely to let you peg him
Leviathan
Are they loud or quiet when having sex do they like it loud
He is petty loud and he doesn’t like that he is so please don’t make fun of him for it
He mouns a lot the poor boys never really had to much physical contact so he can get a bit overwhelmed
He dose like when your loud he is the  Avatar of Envy so he would love to make sure that no one even thought to take you
So when your Loud for him will having sex it boost his self confidence so mutch I
 after care are they good at it or are you cleaning up
He would love to help you but he has no idea what to do so you have to ask him to help you
But he it 100 % joining you in the bath he loves the watter it’s literally his element
So he’ll got in the bath with you and he’ll rub your shoulders and he’ll kiss your neck
But he’s so red wile doing it
He’s still in shock that you wanna be with a stinky otaku like him so give him time
After you two cuddles in his bed tub and he play a video game
what’s the pace are they slow or are they fast
Leviathan go’s at a fast pace at the end but he starts of pretty slow
He doesn’t know what he’s really doing but once he gots a hang of what he’s doing he starts to speed up and get a little more confident
But after your first time with him he not as bad and can start at a fast pace the more you two have sex
Rounds how many do they normally do and how do they feel about quickes
Leviathan  has less stamina than his other brothers but his round last way longer
So he can do 3 to 4 round but they can last anywhere from and hour to and hour and a half
So over all less round but there longer so it’s not a bad turn out
 Oral how do they feel about it and do they prefer giving or receiving
Oral is the one thing in the bed room that leviathan has confidence in
And for a right reason with his long snake like tongue he can practically take you to heaven and back
And he doesn’t mind receiving it too
One really good way to get him to stop playing a game it to start giving him oral wile he’s playing but he does sometimes get med at you for it
Favorite position
Levi’s favorite positions are any with you on his lap it makes him feel like a big strong man something he doesn’t always feel
And he also is really good at tail fucking like god tear and you being on his lag makes it easier for that
But he also like cradle position because he feels like he’s keeping you safe and it helps his Confidence and self-esteem just about
 What are they ok with and what aren’t they ok with
He would 100 % wear a maid outfit for you he might also let you peg him but that one will need you to try really hard to convince him
Like said he’s cool with tail fuck and he loves lap riding
But he dosnt like degrading you in any way shape or form
And no sharing you at all your his and no one else’s 
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Hi, i love everyone's thoughts and opinions over BTS. As an old armys, i understand. I also realize that the boys' success and moves are sometimes can be seen as so fast-paced, that maybe, maybe half of the fandom, especially the old one has not caught up to them.
However, i would love to point out that they are an ARTIST. They find new things and genres to try, they want to keep evolving and finding new avenues, and as artists, i think that's the best they can do. And changing is not a bad thing. Westernized? I understand where this come from, but they only have, including today, 3 english songs. BE album was amazing. Dis- ease is still their vibe. Life goes on is really heart-warming. In terms of lyrics, all songs in the BE album really hits. Maybe, we just have different interpretation.
And knowing BTS by what they have shown us so far, they love evolving, they LOVE trying new things and they love challenging themselves. We, as a fan, don't have the obligations to love everything they do, because they have enough privileges to do whatever and still receiving love. We don't have the rights to limit their creative sides. But i have come to love them beyond music. They are also my comfort people.
I really miss hyyh era. I also had a phase where i cannot enjoy era (dna and fake love era, im sorry) because.... i stucked at hyyh. At one point, i realize that's okay. It's okay. What is not okay is when people keep questioning their decisions and hating on what they do. I think it is very important to not limit their creatives in whatever things they try to do. If what they choose to do does not vibe with you, you can take a break :) Your feelings and opinions are valid so does what BTS chooses to do with their journey. I love you all! Happy Birhday armys <3
Hi, anon! I appreciate all this, and great to know these thoughts from an older ARMY. I agree with your points! They're artists and they do have the right and freedom to evolve, experiment, explore, and work with whomever they want! I personally loved BE, too. To have those different perspectives and expressions of what the world was collectively going through was pretty powerful. I remember them saying that they write what they feel and they always let us into their thoughts and emotions; they let themselves be vulnerable with us (even in their interviews) and now, they're feeling better.
In the amazon music interview, Namjoon said he cried so hard last year out of frustration; they all shared the depression and burn out and to see how they are now - I mean, I know it's an MV but did u see how happy they looked??? Suga did say these emotions come and go and that's normal. And it feels so validating, it's comforting. And like you said, it goes beyond music.
And I get you, HYYH was beautiful; I can't imagine having to move on from that haha (my top 2 fave songs are from there!) but your whole last paragraph was 👌🏽 Respect, I think, is so important. They respect us and we should respect them. Just the fact that they gave us a 5-minute pocket of joy of an MV on ARMY'S BIRTHDAY??? I'm pretty sure their love for us is beyond music, too.
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Raphael x Fem!Reader
Reader is April's little sister and meets the turtles through her. I changed the ages and timeline a bit just because I don't feel entirely comfortable writing the turtles as 15 year old kids. SO the turtles are 18 the reader is 17 nearing 18 and april is 27.
Warnings: some mention of parent death, but nothing else!
Part 1/ ??
Im still pretty new at writing fanfic and have only done a few and this is my very first tmnt one. Constructive criticism and nice things only please!
I didn't remember my dad. My mother gave birth to me a month before his death. I didn’t remember him but my big sister April did. She told me everything she could about him, all kinds of stories and old home videos. It's almost like I know him but I don’t. Sometimes it's sad and I wish for nothing more than to have some memories with him, but I’ve had a good life and have a great family. I’ve lived with my sister since our mom passed 2 years ago from cancer. I miss her a lot, but I like living with April and I love our apartment.
We both have a deep love for media. She is a reporter with Channel 6 and I started making youtube videos right around the time mom died. It was like a video diary back then and has since turned into something completely different, though there are the occasional personal diary type videos.
I was wearing my favorite oversized sweater. It was a deep forest green and nearly reached my knees. It was worn and a bit tattered in some places, but it was the coziest thing ever.. I was barefoot in the kitchen listening to April talking about the latest Foot Clan activity and thinking about the questions she was planning for some guy who worked on the docks. She had convinced her camera guy Vern to take her over there before they shot her morning segment.
“You’re gonna be late!” I called into the living room while putting some breakfastt in a container for her to take on the road.
“Thank you shorty,” She rushed in and gave me a kiss on the cheek as she grabbed her breakfast and rushed out of the kitchen again to grab her bag “I’ll either be back for dinner or late!”
“That's really specific April,” I mutter as a lean in the kitchen doorway and watch her check her purse. “Do you have your touchup bag and your toothbrush?”
April let out a small gasp and rushed back to the bathroom. She came back out with a bag, gathered her things and blew a kiss as she ran out the door. I let out a laugh and went to eat my own food.
I spent the day editing a new video. I just hit 700k last week so I was making a special video to celebrate. It had some songs that I had covered laid over a video of me painting a portrait of my mother and father. It was taken a year before he had died and they had gone on a weekend getaway in the Appalachian mountains.
I didn't look up until April burst through the door. It was already dark out and I hadn’t even noticed.
“I just witnessed a Foot Clan attack!” she called as she walked through the apartment.
“What? Oh my god! Are you okay?” I practically jumped up and followed her as she began pacing around the living room. “April? Are you okay?”
“I’m fine! There I was at the docks trying to get some answers and then BAM! They were there!” She went on about the attack and then started about some kind of vigilante that fought them off.
“Vigilante? Are you serious?” She didn't answer, she just went into her room. I sat back down on the couch and tried to process what she had said. In the end I shook it off and went get some dinner ready.
Over the next few days April was hard to find. She seemed to be constantly on the move and didn't answer her phone. She came home talking about dad's old experiments and giant turtles, and over the next 2 days seemed to just be gone. The spire on the Sacks building fell and The Shredder, who was the leader of the Foot Clan, was arrested and Eric Sacks was revealed to have been working alongside him the whole time. It was a wild time for New York, and April was suddenly quiet about the vigilantes.
Time began to move on and April started talking about these 4 new friends she had that were brothers. They seemed like a fun nice group, and the stories she shared were great.
“So,” I started as we sat together on the couch, “when do I get to meet the brothers?”
April choked on her glass of white wine. “What? Meet them?”
“Yeah, You talk about them all the time! I would like to meet them. They’re all you’ve been talking about for like 3 weeks.” I said as I pushed her with my foot.
“Ummm,” April stopped to think and had a vague look of concern on her face, “I'm not sure actually. They’re pretty busy guys.”
I narrowed my eyes at her. “Uh-huh. If you don't want me to meet them just say so. I was just curious.” I turn my face away from her.
“No it's not that, It's just they’re kinda shy. They don’t really like meeting people.” April's face said that she was telling a lie.
“Okay.” I left it at that clearly something is bugging her about me meeting her friends.
April-
April went to spend some time with the boys, but couldn’t stop thinking about them meeting her little sister. How would she react? She thought to herself, ‘I fainted when I met them, and there are still times when it kinda freaks me out a bit. I don’t want my baby sister to get scared and I don’t want the boys to get hurt because of it.’ They had tried to act like April’s reaction didn’t hurt them, but she knew it did. ‘I just want everyone to be happy.’ She was sitting in the lair watching the boys fight and Mikey brought up their Christmas pop album again. She smiled, (y/n) loved music and often performed covers on YouTube. She was really good at it. She had even written her own songs but at this point refused to release or talk about them on her channel.
“April, is something troubling you?” The brunette turned, surprised to see Master Splinter.
“Oh it’s nothing really.” She paused, “Actually could we talk? I am having some trouble.” Splinter nodded and gestured for her to follow. Not answering the questioning looks of the brothers, they went into Hashi.
“The boys avoid this room as much as possible,” Splinter said with a chuckle, “they will not listen in in here.”
“Makes sense,” April laughed and sat down on a mat with Splinter while looking at the odd structures in the room, “I’m having some trouble with my sister.”
“Oh yes, little (y/n) she had only just been born. I believe your father brought her down to the lab twice in those last weeks.” He thought back fondly on the small soft baby that looked so tiny in the arms of her father but so big compared to him then. “ what is it that is wrong?”
“She wants to meet the brothers. She doesn’t know that they are turtles, but she knows I have new friends.” April said looking down, “ we are very open. We’re the only family we have left so we always know each other's friends. It’s a safety thing I guess.”
Master Splinter hummed and looked at April, who continued.
“She wants to meet them and honestly I want her to too! I think they would all get along so well and I think the boys would adore her. It would also be nice to know that there are 4 ninjas who would look out for her.” April sighed and looked up at the ceiling.
“I just don’t want the boys to get hurt. What if she is afraid of them? What if she screams and calls them monsters or freaks? What if she passes out or cries. It would hurt them so much, and I don’t want to see my sister frightened anyway.” April’s shoulders slumped and she lowered her face to look across at Splinter.
“You know your sister well? Do you think she will react this way?” The rat questioned.
“I don’t know. This isn’t exactly a situation that has ever come up before or one I ever thought I would be in.” She played with her fingers in her lap and she watched him stroke his beard.
“I think you know your sister well and know what would be the best course of action.” He smiled, “I think the trouble now will be convincing the boys to risk meeting her. I have no doubt that it will be a split crowd.”
April nodded and gave a kind of exasperated smile. She knew exactly what he was talking about. Mikey and Ralph would agree, Donnie was iffy, but Leo would say no.
“Thank you Splinter. That does actually help. Do you mind if I stay in here a bit longer?” She asked.
“Go ahead child. Take your time.” Splinter got up and left the Hashi.
April sat and thought about what he had said. She thought back to everything she knew about her sister and what she knew of the boys. If her sister could be accepting she knew that they could have a great friendship. The boys were half a year older than her and they didn't know anyone their age. It would be nice for them to have that she thought. She knew Mikey would be super friendly right away, maybe even too friendly. Donnie would be polite but wary at first and a bit excited. Raph would be happy just to meet another person, but Leo would be cold. She feared that he would be distant and unapproachable and she knew her sister well enough to know she wouldn't be able to handle that.
She took her time and eventually rejoined the brothers. She brushed off their questions with a simple: “I needed advice.” She sat down with them as they all talked and joked around. Finally Donnie brought up the perfect opportunity.
“April you're lucky you don't have brothers.” He said as Mikey bombarded him with insane ideas for gadgets.
“Well I don't have any brothers but I do have a baby sister.” The turtles all turned towards her clearly shocked by this news. “She's actually about 4 months from turning 18.”
“Woah Angelcakes, We didn't know you had a lil’ sis. Is she as beautiful as you?” Mikey said while batting his eyes at her.
“I think she is absolutely gorgeous, and she sings and does art. She’s about to be a senior in high school.” April said while leaning closer to mikey. “Shes shorter than me and has curves for days. She used to be on the dance team actually.” April laughed and Mikey threw himself back and fanned himself with his hand.
“Why haven't you mentioned her?” Leo asked.
“You never asked if I had any siblings. She was born a few weeks before my dad died.” April smiled sadly at that “She actually asked if she could meet you.”
The boys seemed to freeze at that, and suddenly all eyes were on her.
“You told about us?”. Raph asked.
“Kinda. I might have left out the part about being ninja turtles, but I told her about my new friends and she wants to meet you guys.” Raph scoffed at her answer.
“So you didn't actually tell her about us.” He almost snapped at her.
“Cool it Raph.” leo warned.
“I don't wanna be looked at like a freak. She won't want to meet us when she sees us.” he stood up and walked off. April looked at the others who all looked like they wanted to disagree and agree with Raph at the same time.
“Sorry angelcakes, I'm sure baby angelcakes is great though.” Mikey shrugged.
April sat in disbelief that they all basically said no. The lair was quiet after that and she left after they ate some dinner.
She got home only to remember her sister was spending the night at her friends house. So she had the place all to herself. She let out a sigh and poured herself a tall glass of wine and sat on the couch thinking about the events of the day. She came up with a plan as she finished her cup and decided that by the end of the week they boys will have met her baby sister. She grabbed her phone and invited the boys to come hang out at her place for once this upcoming weekend. They didn't even ask if her sister would be there.
(Y/N)-
April had gone out to pick up some pizza for a late night dinner. I had school, homework, and some video editing to do and forgot to cook. April came home late and said not to worry about it and would grab some pizza. Her new favorite place didn’t offer delivery so she went to go get it. I decided that a nice hot shower sounded good and went in. I got out as I heard the front door open and close. I made my way to my room about to throw on my favorite green sweater only to remember that It had been washed and was in the dryer. So, I wrapped my towel back around me and opened my door to head out into the living room. I walked out and looked up only to meet with 4 pairs of eyes.
“Oh my bad,” I said, turning to go back to my room only to stop and turn right back around. “Ummmm…” I trailed off not sure what to say as I stared at 4 very large, very green, oddly human like turtles, all while in a bath towel that left most of my left hip exposed.
“Oh hi (y/n). I forgot to mention I had friends coming over.” April said walking into the room. “You might wanna put some clothes on though.”
“Yeah…” I said not able to look away from the very large turtle creatures sitting in the living room.
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i saw that post from the girl who's girlfriend isn't quite ready to be out. if ur blog didnt seem to celebrate love of all kinds (and i'm not talking straight vs gay, i'm talking happy vs sad) i would have kept this to myself, but between ur response and the op's story itself, i think im going to take this chance of sharing a burden on my heart, maybe to help someone else, or just for the shot at becoming at peace with it. a couple weeks ago, when u asked for everyone to send u stories of their lovers, i wrote most of this out but didnt send it.
i (21F) am a college student (god, is this reddit?). my entire life, i have cultivated the cleanest good girl image that i could. my parents sacrificed so much for my sister and i to grow up far more comfortable then they did, so i have tried to honor them with a little golden child they could brag about. straight As, never missed school, did community service, perfect SATs. i worked tirelessly to be on-paper perfect.
one of the reasons i've worked so hard to earn Good Noodle Stars is to make up for the fact that i am terminally homosexual. i realized real early that i could literally cure cancer and the first comment on the news video will be, "okay, she cured cancer, but at least I'm not gay like she is." i could raise thousands for charity, and my aunts would still say, "our kids may not get off the couch but at least they have sex correctly." so they dont know. few people do, none outside my closest circle.
in walks Mars(21NB). Mars is an anachronism. they are both a romantic with and without a capital R. be still my Dark Academia heart.
we got very close before school broke for Covid. Mars wrote me a letter every other week, encrypted and folded so that the only way to open them was to rip a paper seam that would show if someone had tampered with it. it was intoxicating. it was the first time i felt able to communicate freely about anything. i dont know - i didnt hold back my emotions, emboldened by writing in cipher. i spent all summer waiting for those red sealed envelopes, filled with stories and poetry and honeyed nonsense, and i refused to not respond with mirrored passion.
it was all great until it set in that I was going to have to face Mars again, in person. i prayed our school would decide all students had to stay remote. of course I wanted to see Mars, i want to do much more than just see them, but i knew it would only be a matter of time between us being reunited and them asking me out.
this was a person who crafted a puzzle where the answers were flowers that were a declaration of fidelity in Victorian Flower Language. of course i ate that up with a spoon. u would have too. listen, i know all aesthetics are fads and all fads age badly, but if the cottagecore girls get to learn to sew and bake and grow, i owe dark academia for teaching me the vocabulary and actions of my most treasured relationship yet, and giving me permission to be earnest and vulnerable in this life for 10 goddamn minutes. Mars is handsome and a genius and i was not used to feeling connected to anyone. but for all that joy, i was also drowning with the thought of having to break their heart by explaining i cant date anyone AFAB.
so the semester starts. Mars asks me over for a homecooked meal since restaurants don't exist here at the end of the world. they made me a beautiful dinner with all my dietary needs in mind. just like everything else i ate it up. and i made no effort to stop them from inviting me over for food and conversation again and again and a fourth time just to make sure it really hurt.
they kissed me after the last dinner. and I kissed them back, before stopping. they apologized for moving too quickly, but i explained that they had moved at the perfect pace, just with the wrong person.
there is no nice ending to this. it's real life. Mars took it as a breakup and didnt reach out to me again. i sobbed from halloween to christmas, i swear. i'm the villain in this story.
i started this post off as a sign of solidarity to the other young lady, but now im realizing that this letter would be better read by her fearful beloved, not her. it is 4am where i live, so i apologize if this has all gotten away from me.
love is a garden u have to water yourself. ngl, my favorite part about this blog is all the posts about learning to love yourself, learning to see ur intrinsic value dispite the core facets of u that have been deemed flaws, and trust the relationship between me, myself, and i.
i started out telling myself i was writing this to help the high school kid, but i havent shared this with anyone. writing this out has helped me process a thing or two, or at least start to. i like this idea of lavendersage being a kindly cryptid who will alchemise ur heartache into calm.
i hope you dont mind if i try to make this a thing.
my story is in the shape of a love letter. its tearstained before it even hits the water. i drop it in your river and watch it float away.
y’all are breaking my heart with these stories this week 🤧i feel so sad to read them and so helpless to respond, because i know how deep that pain must run and i don’t know if there’s truly anything i could say or do to take it away. but if i can lessen it from 100 to 99, well, then i’ll have fulfilled my goal of existing on this website. at the very least, i’m glad that writing this message helped you process some things on your own, but i’m happy to share my thoughts anyway.
your mars sounds like a top tier human being. victorian flower language? i’m swooning. it’s no surprise to me that you fell for them, and they were clearly head over heels for you. folks don’t make grand gestures like that for just anyone, that’s for sure 🥺
and i’m very sad to hear about the way things ended. but, anon, i can’t help but wonder if it is indeed over, or if hope exists on the precipice of a great act of bravery performed by you--something i know from experience is much easier said than done, and something i’ve failed to do in the past, so i’m not trying to be a hypocrite here. the ball is definitely in your court, though.
also...it doesn’t sit well with me to hear you call yourself a villain. i understand why you see it that way, as it’s clear that you deeply care for this person. but for many folks...the fear of what our family will say or think or do weighs so heavily on us that it robs us of any possibility of happiness with someone who isn’t the kind of person our family wants us to end up with. i’m sure plenty of folks, myself included, can empathize with this. and i’m sure on some level, mars does too.
my love, as with all things, i hope whatever happens next works out for the best, and that you don’t let this experience darken your heart. if things change between you and mars, please feel free to drop me a note. i’ll always be here to listen 💚💚💚`
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fallingforyou!namjoon | a-z
⤑ series: falling for you
⤑ genre: smut, student!namjoon x student!reader, college au.
⤑ rating: explicit.
⤑ warnings: smut talk... (mentions of) oral sex (f/m. receiving), penetrative sex, cumplay, masturbation...
⤑ A/N: lowkey didn’t realize how long its been since i first posted this... kinda sad :( my first sm au , im soo proud of it omg.
A = Aftercare (what's he like after sex):
Joon is very gentle and sweet with you, so this translates into the aftercare. He's always making sure that you're okay and that he didn't go too rough; would even offer you water or something to eat if you looked especially worn out.
B = Body Part (his favorite body part of his and also yours):
All of you is his favorite, but if he had to choose... Namjoon would be picking your legs as his favorite body part. They were so long and always so soft, not to mention flexible. His favorite body part of his would be his hands, because you liked how big they were always requesting spanks from them.
C = Cum (anything to do with cum basically...):
There had been a time where you were on your knees for him, putting in your best work and completely blowing his mind... he hadn't had the chance to warn you and before he could he was spilling into your mouth / catching the both of you off guard. Your cheeks puffing as his cum filled your mouth... might be his favorite sight.
D = Dirty Secret (pretty self-explanatory, a dirty secret of his):
No matter how many times he's rolled his eyes at the request, he really likes it when you take control. Even if it's just something as simple as riding him. Likes seeing how you lose yourself in it.
E = Experience (how experienced is he? does he know what he's doing?):
Right about in the middle. Didn't have loads of meaningless sex under his belt, but he knew what he was doing. A tad bit more experienced than you, but the two of you still managed to find new experiences to share and discover together.
F = Favorite Position (this goes without saying...):
Cowgirl, rather than reverse cowgirl. He liked when you were on top, but more so when you were facing him so he could see everything. From the way your face twists in pleasure to the way your tits bounced... plus that way his hands could get busy too.
G = Goofy (is he more serious in the moment, or is he humorous, etc.):
He wasn't serious to the point where the sex was boring or there was no adventure, he was just more careful than anything. Wanted to make sure that he was never hurting you and you were always enjoying himself, plus he didn't want to risk things growing awkward... so leaving the jokes out of the bedroom was his best bet.
H = Hair (how well-groomed is he, does the carpet match the drapes? how does he like you?):
Neatly shaven, just a thin layer of hair covering his pelvic bone. He figured you'd like it better that way, although he never could bring himself to ask... he liked you however you wanted to be, didn't really have a preference as long as it was you. You liked to keep yourself clean shaven and it made things easier when going down on you, so it was a win-win.
I = Intimacy (how is he in the moment, romantic aspect...):
Very, very romantic. A lot of hand holding and eye contact. But sometimes it would get a bit too intense so he'd be looking away with a dimpled smile. Because he wasn't for goofing around in the bedroom, he made up for that with all the romance he could muster... has even surprised you with lit candles and flowers once or twice.
J = Jack off (masturbation headcanon):
Not really for it. Joon would rather be with you than himself... but if there was a reason why the two of you couldn't be together and he was exceptionally horny, he would just do it. But would be craving you right after, so it would be like a waste of time.
K = Kink (one ore more of his kinks):
Facials. Discovered the night he accidentally came in your mouth and couldn't stop thinking how you'd look with it all over your face. He was shocked when you agreed and was ready to try it on the spot. Now every blowjob ends with a sticky masterpiece on your cheeks.
L = Location (favorite places to do the do):
He liked to get into it and be as comfortable as possible when he was with you, so at home was his favorite place. Either his place or yours. Wasn't a huge fan of interruptions or limitations so who evers place had the less guests, he'd be willing to go there to get one off.
M = Motivation (what turns him on, gets him going):
You do. Seeing you dance, watching you enjoy yourself. Hearing your laugh. He wasn't busting boners each time you pulled a cute face, but he was always paying a lot of attention to you and had become so infatuated that you effected him in ways he couldn't explain. Also, the way you'd discreetly brush against him when you were feeling needy... that would no doubt have him standing at attention.
N = NO (something he wouldn't do, turn offs):
Handcuffs. Did not like them in the least bit. They hurt his wrists and did not like not being able to touch you freely. He would, though, try it if you really wanted... but would insist on putting them on you.
O = Oral (preference in giving or receiving, skill, etc.):
Receiving. He was not, by any means, against going down on you... but there was something different about seeing you with his cock down his throat. No matter what, though, Joon was always returning the favor; and because he liked the sound of your moans, he'd just listen to them as a hint of him doing well.
P = Pace (is he fast and rough? slow and sensual? Etc.):
Slow and sensual, but fast toward the end. Joon being romantic and soft with you, would definitely opt for the slow roll of the hips, allowing you to feel every inch of him with each thrust, but as he started to loose himself in it – his thrusts would become more sloppy and uncontrolled until it was just a mess of untimed jerks that had both of you moaning out in surprise.
Q = Quickie (his opinions on quickies rather than proper sex, how often... etc.):
Not a fan. Would only go for a quickie if it was absolutely necessary, if not he would just wait until you were able to do the whole thing correctly.
R = Risk (is he game to experiment, does he take risks):
Joon is down to try whatever you want to try, might roll his eyes or joke about your requests but would be open minded for the most part. It was more often than not that he was discovering things that he never thought he'd like.
S = Stamina (how many rounds can he go for, how long does he last...):
He could do about two rounds with a rest in between. Since he likes to start with slow thrusts, he is actually able to last a lot longer... ranging from ten or so minutes in the first round. The second is usually shorter, but just as good.
T = Toy (does he own toys? does he use them? on a partner or himself?):
Nope. But you do and he was surprised when he found out. Joon has never seen you use it... or even seen it for that matter, but he would not be against you whipping it out one night and acting as if you were the only one in the room.
U = Unfair (how much does he like to tease?):
He tries to tease quite a lot, but ends up giving up because he's also teasing himself. You tease him right back, which doesn't help his situation... like at all. Joon finds it really hard to say no to you, so if he starts to tease, it'll last a good few minutes before he's giving in.
V = Volume (how loud is he, what sounds does he make?):
Not that aloud, grumbled grunts and groans in your ear that always has your toes curling. You're the one making the most noise, unless it's a blowjob that he's getting. In that case, it's constant praise and pleas for you to take him deeper, do it faster... harder, his hands automatically finding your hair as he watches you through gasps.
W = Wild Card
Joon would spend every second of every day 69-ing with you if he had the chance.
X = X-Ray (let's see what's going on in those pants, pictures or words):
The man is big. Like h u g e ! Like, imprint in gray sweats while soft... huge.
Y = Yearning (how high is his sex drive?):
Very high. He's always wanting you even if he's just had you. Even if he's too tired. He'll figure out a way to go again if you're looking at him in a particular way saying that you wanted more.
Z = Zzz... (how quickly does he fall asleep afterwards?):
He's not falling asleep right after, but does need a moment to rest or catch his breath. If he was already tired before beginning, than he'd be knocking out literally seconds after he's cum, only to wake up thirty minutes later ready to cuddle and coo sweet things to each other.
#namjoon#namjoon smut#kim namjoon#namjoon x reader#bts x reader#falling for you sm au#bts#bts smut#namjoon sm au#namjoon a-z
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creator tag
Rules: It’s time to love yourselves! Choose your 5 (ish) favorite works you created in the past year (fics, art, edits, etc.) and link them below to reflect on the amazing things you brought into the world in 2020. Tag as many writers/artists/etc. as you want (fan or original) so we can spread the love and link each other to awesome works!
thank you @kckenobi and @pandora15 for the tag!! <3 so here are the works, in no particular order and also oh gee i am so sorry this got so painfully long you can tell i’m procrastinating on my final + also i just tend to run my mouth when im talking about writing asdffd
to these memories (After Darth Sidious is defeated, everything changes. Some for the better, others not so much. Mostly better though. (Or: Anakin becomes a dad. Rex rehabilitates clone troopers who no longer want to be a part of the army. Ahsoka gets a call from an old friend. And maybe Obi-Wan finds out it’s not just his enemies who don’t stay dead. Basically, everyone gets the happy ending they deserve.)
so this was my first major longform tcw fic, and i just. i have a lot of feelings about this fic, mostly nostalgia and lots of gratefulness. first of all, i think i met a lot of super cool people through this fic, and i also? just? idk, this was a major project that i kind of worked on to cope with post-tcw sadness + also just. general sadness about the world’s situation. writing this story was actually super healing for me, mostly because i just. really wanted to have something where happy endings existed.
so this really...was an experience, and i’m so super grateful for everyone who read along. to this day, whenever i get a comment about this fic, i feel super happy because it makes me feel glad to know that there were some people who took comfort in this work, because i really wanted this fic to have that kind of effect on people. :’)
there they are (Right before Ahsoka leaves for Mandalore, Rex distracts Bo-Katan so she could give her family a proper goodbye. (There's hugging. We just needed our trio to hug.)
i think this was one of my first tcw fics of 2020, and. i just remember impulse writing this after watching old friends not forgotten because i was just. so sad that we didn’t get an anakin and ahsoka hug or a trio hug or anything. i understand why they didn’t--like, i really, really do, but. but i think if there’s a theme i’m going through this year, it’s ‘this was sad, so i’m gonna make it happy!!!’, so...as my masterlist puts it, ‘dave filoni said no trio hug, so i said fine, i’ll do it’.
uhhhhh, how very unusual of me, but!!! probably my working on a new original story. i’ve got the fourth draft of another story siting in the background, but. this other story idea came at me, and five outlines later, i started this story. i’m about three chapters down now, but. a snippet of the prologue:
“Well…it’s also a rather important story,” Rosalind said. “Do you enjoy stories?”
“I want to be a writer,” I blurted, and I stopped at that. I fiddled with my mug, heat that had nothing to do with the hot chocolate or the fire rushing to my face. Silly, oversharing me—oh, what a young, lonely child I was back then. So desperate for conversation that I had grown out of practice and resorted to sharing details that the average stranger would not care for.
But then again, these were not the average strangers—although I’m sure you’ve figured that for yourself.
“Yes,” I said meekly. “I enjoy stories.”
“Well,” Dae said after some time, “it’s good that you’re a writer.”
I lifted my head, and this time, I saw Dae and Rosalind smile at each other. A softer smile, one that made me feel suddenly dreadfully, dreadfully lonely.
“You might want to write this down,” Rosalind said at last.
And so I did.
*and cue the actual story* i won’t say too much because adsfsdfsfd talking about my original work makes me feel awkward + also i am constantly in fear of people stealing ideas even though,,,even though i know the only person who can write this story is me, anyways, but uh. i will say that i have a plan for a five-part series that’s basically about a witch and a princess. there’s a prophecy in the background. there’s magic. there’s rivals to friends to enemies to lovers. there’s father figures + big sister figures + found family + ancient kingdoms + the real world blending with the fantasy world + uh i’ve said enough okeee bye that’s it
the moment was enough (The war ends. Ahsoka and Obi-Wan try to work things out since the last time they actually saw each other.)
it had been a long while since i had written anything that was really just about ahsoka and obi-wan, but. i think everyone knows that i really love my grandpadawan and grandmaster duo? idk, this fic really made me feel things because i was thinking a lot about how obi-wan and ahsoka had left things. i wanted to make it pretty clear that they both clearly care about each other a lot, but like. also. there’s still some hurt there. i just had so much fun writing this, because obi-wan and ahsoka are such an underrated duo and i love them :’)
loose stitches (The discovery and aftermath of Maul. Anakin and Ahsoka find themselves pacing in front of the Council chambers multiple times. They might have taken Obi-Wan to Dex’s. Something might have unraveled, only to be stitched back together.)
kasey before you say anything pls know that i would talk about this fic until literally the day i die i am sorry if i am making you feel self-conscious--but anyways this was a collab with the ever-talented, ever-wonderful @kckenobi. so uh, quick story which mayhaps i might not have told anyone before, but whatever, i’m listening to evermore and therefore have no choice but to be emotional huh--this fic was like...one of the first collabs i’ve ever done? in general, collaborations were always something that made me nervous because it required lots of vulnerability and honesty, and there’s a side of me that’s very obsessed with having this image of Neat Writer Who Has Coherent Thoughts (which,,,doesn’t even exist so why was i obsessed? no idea). so that said, this collab was just. so wild + wonderful because it really was, first of all, such a cool, magical experience. there’s something so amazing and insane about passing words back and forth and like, even a screen apart, there’s something magical about like. sitting down at a laptop at the end of the day and feeling like you’re about to step into a portal where it’s just two people trying to spin a story. writing with kasey was just such a wonderful, absolutely magical experience, and i’m really glad that we got to write this story + the many more that we did. just. there’s something really personal and beautiful about writing until 1, 2, 3 am when the world’s asleep. anyways. magical.
asdfsdfd i’m very sorry that this got so incredibly long, but!! that said, 2020 was a hard year for lots of different reasons both personally + because of *gestures at the world* but. like. i’m really, really glad that i got back to writing clone wars fic this year, because i’ve met so many wonderful, wonderful, wonderful people here, and. yeah. y’all are my serotonin suppliers, and i do refer to a lot of people here as ‘oh yeah, my friend and i were talking the other day about...’ and ‘why are you smiling?’ ‘oh, just something a friend said--’ and. yeah. i hope y’all have a wonderful, wonderful rest of the year + also a wonderful life because y’all are simply the best :’))
no-pressure tags: @lightasthesun @meandmyechoes @soplantyourownflowers @ilonga @sonderwalker @mytardisisparked @60sec400 and really, honestly, anyone else who wants to!!! <333 (like. i mean it. literally. just tag me and lemme scream encouragements at you.)
#tag game#thank you!!#caroline stop writing essays challenge!!!!#i cannot and will not stop writing essays i guess adsfsdf
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Sorry to pry, if you don’t mind Soho, can you tell us a little about your experience with when you dated someone who was 35 when you were 19? (Only if you’re comfortable to share, of course. I’m not trying to judge you btw, just genuinely curious about larger age gap relationships)
Sure, I don’t mind. I feel like it sounds more crazy than it actually is in experience. Dating an older guy in his 30s when you are 19/ early 20s, I feel like is no different than when you’re at that age and you’re dating someone your age. By that I mean, that it’s true when they say men take longer to mature. The only difference I really found was that it’s obvious he had more experience in life, therefore he knew what he wanted and did it, and he knew what he wanted in life and nothing would stand in his way to change that. He also gave great advice. Better sex experience, too. Other than those things, there’s nothing odd or strange about it at all. He was the love of my life for a period of time, and I knew what I felt when I felt it for him. There were people his age who critiqued us at first, but that was because they knew nothing about our relationship, both romantic and friendship. He was one of my best friends.
Age gap aside, we were still both Millennials. Just opposite ends of the spectrum. The downside I can tell you, is that I do judge him now that im older, for treating me the way he did. He should’ve known that at 19, even though I felt like I knew what I wanted, I still had a lot of growing up to do. Now at an older age, I kind of judge him for dating me, because I had absolutely no idea what I was doing yet or what I really wanted. But that’s really it. It wasn’t like we never had serious conversations about starting a family. Like I said, I loved him. So yeah, the trickiest things about age gap relationships is that usually the younger girl still wants to have fun and take it slow when the older guy already knows what's what, and they are stubborn. Nothing can get in their way, kind of attitude. That includes goals and what you want to achieve in life and at what pace. Those kind of things, I feel, are the real issues in age gap. Or at least it was in my case at 19. I hope this answers your Q.
- SH
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1) Hope u are ok, i will let you this one here. Bakugou coming out as asexual-aromanitc, and having to explain to everyone what is it. (And if you want angst, people not believing him, that he's not grown enough to know, all that bullshit) Sorry is a little bit of proyection.
I’m doing well, thank you!!! And dw, I project HARDCORE and I also LOVE aroace Katsuki so it’s all good!! (i’m actually gonna project a bit in this one lol)
OKAY!!!
When the other kids were busy talking about crushes and who they were dating, Katsuki was focused on becoming a hero.
He had no time for romance, especially that sappy type he always sees on tv.
No, Katsuki was gonna become the greatest hero, and he would do that alone.
He never thought much of it. It didn’t seem unusual to him that he never had an interest in anyone else, that he couldn’t join in on conversations where the topic was romantic love or sexual attraction.
In fact, he felt smug when all the other extras were held down by girlfriends and boyfriends and datemates while he was forging on ahead. Seeing the confusion and awe on their faces when he told them that he had never been attracted to anyone was enough to erase the slight embarrassment he felt at not being able to relate to them.
Katsuki was invincible, unaffected by the curse that is romantic and sexual attraction, and he needs to let everybody know it.
(A few years later, at the tender age of 13, Katsuki finds he isn’t a superior being, he’s just aroace...
Well... okay then.)
He is aroace and still unaffected by the curse that is romantic and sexual attraction!
He didn’t really have friends to share his epiphany with, and the extras that followed him around were too dense to know what he was talking about to care. Besides, they’d probably just hear that he wasn’t attracted to girls and throw a fit.
Anyway, it’s not like he really wants to share this. No, this information is for Katsuki and Katsuki only.
But when he gets into UA, starts building a, admittedly reluctant at first, relationship with his classmates, the desire to tell them something he’s kept locked away grows.
It all comes to a head one night at the dorms. It’s a rare night of him hanging out in the common room with most of his other classmates.
Katsuki doesn’t know how the conversation steers this way, but the topic is now crushes. Some people are coming out, some people are just observing. Katsuki is becoming bored, and just as he gets up to leave, he’s noticed and asked, “Who do you have a crush on?”
He’s tempted to ignore the question, but surrounded by this open group of people that showed their support whenever someone revealed themself to be gay or bisexual or pan, he has the urge to let them know this part of him as well.
So he replies. “I don’t have one.”
“So who did you have a crush on?”
“Never had one either, Earjacks.”
Everyone becomes interested now.
Jirou looks skeptical, “It’s not weak to have a crush, yknow. If you don’t wanna tell us, fine, but to lie—”
“I ain’t lying, I’m aroace.”
There’s silent confusion, and Katsuki’s heartbeat thunders in his chest.
Someone asks what that is and, huffing, Katsuki tells them, “It means I don’t experience romantic, aro, or sexual, ace, attraction.”
They ignore his muttered “dumbasses” in favor of questioning him with a “You don’t, or you haven’t?”
“I just said I don’t. What are you on about?”
Kaminari then decides to speak up. “Dude, just give it time! You don’t know who you’re gonna meet that’ll knock you right off those stubborn feet of yours.” And he punctuates it with a wink.
Katsuki is getting annoyed.
“Okay, whatever. If that happens, that happens, but right now, it hasn’t. Therefore, I’m choosing the label aroace.”
Momo, with a finger on her chin and a contemplative expression on her face decides to voice, “But aren’t you acting a little hasty, Bakugou-kun? You shouldn’t use such a definitive label when you’re so young.”
Some people are voicing their agreement, and Katsuki feels like screaming, but he’s too busy being frozen in shock, looking at Momo with with the most incredulous look he could muster.
“What the actual fuck? How is me calling myself aroace any more ‘definitive’ than y’all calling yourself gay?” He can’t help the crack in his voice as he continues, “I’m genuinely confused.”
Before they could reply, Katsuki asks his own question with the most deadpan look he could offer:
“Do you ever wanna date a cat?”
There are exclamations of “No” and looks of bewilderment, but Katsuki continues, crossing his arms.
“Well I don’t think you should act so certain. I mean, maybe you haven’t met the right cat, yet.”
They’re telling him that that’s different, shouldn’t be used as an argument.
But then Kirishima perks up, and Katsuki feels dread consume him.
“Love, or don’t love I guess, who you... don’t... love, bro!”
And Katsuki feels hope bloom in his chest.
Only to have it crushed with his best friend’s next words.
“But we’re just trying to help you! We don’t want you to feel like you’re moving too fa—“
“Not only did I not ask for any help, but how is any of this helping me?!” Katsuki throws his arms in the air. “I came out to you guys, something we’ve been doing all evening, and you have the audacity to tell me I’m wrong?!”
He’s pacing now.
“Why the hell are you acting like I’m signing a death wish with my identity! You guys are the biggest fucking hypocrites, holy hell.”
Katsuki shakes his head and storms off, unwilling to be in that toxic situation any longer.
The next few days are met with guilt-ridden eyes from his classmates and the cold shoulder from him.
They don’t try to approach him, and for that, Katsuki is grateful, because he doesn’t know what he’d do if the people that rejected who he is tried to act like they did nothing wrong.
Yeah, maybe they weren’t being malicious, maybe it was just ignorance, but Katsuki is by no means obligated to forgive nor teach them. Until they pull their heads out of their asses and realize there’s a plus after LGBTQ for a reason, he’s perfectly fine with the distance.
OKAY SO TWO ENDINGS
1) The class that was there does their research and apologizes and are forgiven and whatnot (happy ending)
2) The class doesn’t do their research and just assumes that Katsuki doesn’t want to have sex or kiss anyone. They apologize, but the relationship is still tense with their ignorant comments and jokes. Katsuki is still hurt, especially when they start dating each other or other students, and he’s left to be the only one that values a strong friendship over romance. He feels left behind. (Angsty ending)
OR WAIT!!! ANOTHER ENDING!!!
3) The class doesn’t apologize or do their research, because they think Katsuki was making a big deal out of nothing. After those few weeks of the silent treatment, they try to approach him and act like everything is great.
Katsuki is angry and hurt, but eventually he finds comfort and very close friendships with Todoroki, Tokoyami, Shinsou, and Shoji. Not all of them are aroace, but they’re on the spectrum for one or both (bittersweet ending)
IM DONE!!! This honestly didn’t go the way I was thinking it would go, but I ain’t upset so it’s all good.
So ofc I projected with the being annoyed when people act like my sexuality isn’t a real thing (which is lots of ppl online and the classmates I told when they asked)
Also, that part about telling people that you’ve never had a crush and being smug when they’re like :0? Yeah, I used to do that until I was 13 when my older sib was like “yeah, you’re aroace” and I was like :0 “i saw that term in one fanfiction years back but i genuinely didn’t think abt it when i looked up to see what ‘ace’ meant but it fits perfectly”
So anyway, my sib also told me that what I was is Agender (which I knew abt but thought “that’s not me,,, right?” wrong) and I realized when they asked me if they could tell their friend my gender identity. I was confused like sure?? and then they said i was agender and their friend asked for my pronouns and i said i didn’t care
like,, i thought i was nb, but i wasn’t sure exactly what “type”(?) idk, but after that, i looked at the definition for agender that i didn’t understand before and was like :0 yep that’s me
ANYWAY YOU PROBABLY DIDNT WANT ALL OF THAT PERSONAL MUMBO JUMBO BUT THIS HC RELATES TO ME A LOT SO
THANK YOU SO MUCH FOR THIS 💖💗💕💞💝
#wow! asks!#bnha#boku no hero academia#mha#my hero academia#bakugou katsuki#bakugo katsuki#bakugou#aroace#aromantism#asexual#tw aphobia#but it’s due to ignorance#bakugou headcanons#bnha headcanons
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