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95jezzica · 8 months

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Your replies are closed, so I'll send this as an ask instead. I strongly agree with your idea of "Canon-Canon Nyo Nations", where the male and female characters represent regional cultures within the same country instead of making the female nations a "dream universe" gimmick. Expanding on this idea, what do you think about OCs who represent regions of the same nation? I would think it's a logical next step because 2 characters per country still wouldn't be enough to represent all regional cultures.

[Picture ID: Jamtland send an additional ask which says: "Whoops, I forgot to include this part in my first ask about "Canon-Canon Nyo Nations". What are your ideas for which regional cultures the female Nordics would represent, and what would the differences between them and the male Nordics? Picture ID End].

Oh yeah, sorry, the replies are still turned off. I have a post which seems to summon a lot of hateful idiots, so eventually I got too annoyed by it and turned off replies.

For the rest I will preface my answer with the fact I saw you're also Swedish on your profile, but I'll likely leave some extra information for any non-Swedes who might also read this, since I mostly use Sweden as an example. Also, fair warning to everyone: Long Post. [Below "Read More"].

For simplicity sake I've also choosen to just call nyo!Sweden Svea, and our canon-canon Sweden for... Well, Sweden.

Now, I personally don't make a lot of OCs unless they're humans or I'm making a human AU. (For an example I made Finland some "AU Parents", because I got REALLY tired of people always making Finland the orphan with no other family). With that said making OCs for regions and the likes is obviously still valid.

I also agree 2 personifications are too few for many countries, but I also understand why Hima wouldn't want to draw 3-100 characters for every country. Identity within a country is complicated too, because it depends a lot on who you're talking with as you describe your own identity.

If we take myself as an example. If I was talking with someone from another country I'd probably just say I'm European and/or Swedish, and perhaps mention I live on the west coast if they ask and/or seem more familiar with Swedish geography. If another Swede or Nordic asked I'd probably mention I live pretty close to Gothenburg - and if they live nearby I might go into more details, because my lil' hometown is small enough that there's no chance even other Swedes has heard of it unless they live somewhat close/have family in the area anyway.

My point is that it'd be difficult to make a representation for all kind of national-/regional-/state- identity within a country.

However, if we once again take Sweden as an example, I think (hws) Sweden would likely represent a lot of the middle/pretty far up in the west coast. Think the old Goths, and/or possibly Dalsland, Värmland, Dalarna.

Dalarna has the bonus of having a strong identity of their own in their region, and all three are placed close to (irl) Norway. It'd make sense how (hws) Norway and Sweden got to know each other early on then, but also how they might have met (hws) Denmark early.

Svea at the other hand is someone I view more as being further north-east, likely the literal ol' Svea, and someone I headcanon to have been among the first Swedish personification(s) to get into contact with the Finnish personifications.

It's weird though, because neither Sweden nor Svea really gives off "Stockholm vibes" (sorry non-Swedes/Nordics, I have no idea how to describe what "Stockholm vibes is) - but then again they are all based on Japanese stereotypes about the Swedes, so I guess it makes sense. x)

Another possibility I can imagine is the Swedish personifications in modern days being divided into something like this:

[Picture ID: A map of real life Sweden cut into three parts. From up to down: Norrland in strawberry red, Svealand in autumn leaf yellow, and Götaland in bright sea blue. End of Picture ID].

... with perhaps an additional personification for the far north and south. However, we have to keep in mind a lot of the far north of real life Sweden's lands would still be in the ice age early on and/or simply not be Swedish - and parts of what today is the real life far south Sweden would be with Denmark instead.

[Picture ID: An edited version of the previous picture, now with almost all of Norrland and the far south of Sweden faded out, since they weren't part of real-life Sweden at this point. Only a small part of south-east Norrland remains, now coloured and part of Svealand. The names are now also edited to say "North Swe" instead of "Norrland", "Svea" instead of "Svealand", and "1p!Sweden" instead of Götaland. End of Picture ID].

The picture above is a quick edit made by me and should by no means be used as a picture of research, so obviously not exact accuracy or anything, but it's a rough estimate of what (irl) Sweden would have looked like very early on, and also roughly what I headcanon (hws) 1p!Sweden and nyo!Sweden to represent/have represented respectively.

In history the Svea people more or less forced a union with the goths, but I headcanon (hws) Svea had absolutely no interest in working with the humans leaders and basically dumped all the responsibility and work on our (hws) Sweden instead. While Sweden was forced to work more closely with royals and leaders, Svea set to truly live like their people. That's not say say (hws) Sweden didn't interact with the "common people" at all, because he's a rebellious shit in his own right, but he was still forced to take on a lot of the responsibility and work with his leaders.

It didn't help that once Christianity was brought up in Scandinavia together with a less favourable view of women, 1p!Sweden no longer had a real choice than to take on the work. I think (hws) Svea moved back in with Sweden around the time Christianity became more common in Sweden (the lands and people), too. Partly because she felt guilty over having just dumped all the work and responsibility onto (hws) Sweden, but also because it was safer to live with someone she viewed and could claim as her brother. Svea would also have started out to (secretly) help Sweden out with work around this time, which only became official closer to modern days.

For the rest of the Swedish personifications I don't have a clear picture of what they'd look like, but the personification of "south-south" Sweden (in old days more viewed as "east Denmark") is likely around the same age as Denmark, Sweden and Svea, while the personification of Norrland is much younger than the rest of the Swedish personifications. I'd say (hws) Norrland likely didn't pop up until the Swedish population grew much bigger in the north and the Sami people were pushed further and further out in their lands by the Swedish population.

(cough). So I know I've basically only covered Sweden so far, but this post is already getting ridiculously long, so I will cheat a bit and refer you to @ifindus for Norway's regions instead. xD

[Again, art and OCs of the Norwegian regions made by @ifindus .]

Findus fully uses OCs for the regions to be fair, so I'm not entirely sure what I would make nyo!Norway represent since I really like Findus' OCs. x') . Maybe nyo!Norway could be more specifically the Oslo area? Because Oslo Norwegians are very different from Norwegians in the rest of Norway.

As generalization I'd say most of the Nordics probably have at least 3-5 personifications though, with one of them being the nyo. For an example Denmark might be divided into Jylland, Syddanmark, Sjælland, Hovedstaden - or it'd go a bit more detailed like cutting up Jylland in North & South like most maps.

(The Faroe & Greenland would obviously also have their own personifications, btw).

Hope this was helpful, and sorry I didn't get to cover them all in the post! x)

If inspiration hits me I might make another posts with the rest of the Nordics in the future. \^w^/

#Hetalia #hws Sweden #hws #hws nyo!Sweden #nyo!Sweden #hws Norway #hws Norwegian Regions #hws NyoTalia #hws Nordics #hws Svea #hws Goths #ask #hws Ask #hws Asks #Asks

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jungkookstatts · 1 year

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안녕하세요, 여러분!

[Translation]: Hello, everyone!

Hah, this makes me shy lol. Please bare with me.

Anyways, welcome to the blog!

Recently, I’ve been overcome with this gut feeling that I should finally launch this blog. I’ve been writing for years now, but I’ve always been so shy with social media, expressing personal self, and showcasing writings. So, I never really had the courage to post.

But, as apart of my new years resolution, I will let it all go and express myself like how I wanted to within the last few years. I am excited, nervous, and slightly razzled by the fact that I’m really going through with this. But I am ready.

A little about what I intend to post:

This will primarily be a BTS blog. Though I love every member, the majority of my writings are y/n scenarios with Namjoon, Yoongi, or Jungkook. I have writings for everyone; however, i tend to feel more confident with my writings with the prior three boys.

I do write 18+ scenarios, so adults only!! My writings will also always be female x male, not because I am against pairings with other genders, but because that is what I am most used to writing and am more familiar with. Still, if you identify as any other, you are always welcome to read. I intend to keep this space as a strict respectful zone to all people.

Another disclaimer: I do not own BTS or anyone else I choose to incorporate in my writings. I write with them in interest as apart of a fictional story — as a face and personality that is unique to them (in real life and in a story) — but never to disrespect, alter, or manipulate to fit my or others standards. Their respect comes with the respect of anyone else.

Now for formatting, here is how I will organize my writings in post:

Title

[picture heading]

Summary: [2-4 sentences]

Theme/Tags: [EX: Highschool!AU, Non-Idol!AU, Yoongi x best friend’s sister!AU, etc.]

Rating/Disclaimer: [18+/A/Smut/S/Mature/M , Fluff/F, Angst, Romance, etc…]

Word Count: [x,xxx words]

Author’s Note: [me blabbling]

A little about me:

Hi!

You can call me Sae, if you’d like.

I am a double-major, third-year university student! I do take Korean there! It has been just about a year and a half since I started learning it, and I love it to the core. It is really such a beautiful language and culture, and I am so glad I went through with taking it. I could talk about it for hours!

As for BTS, I have been a fan since I was in 8th grade…so 2015-2016? My first ever bias was Taehyung…ofc lol. However, I have been a Yoongi bias since around 2017-ish. Bias wrecker? I bet you can’t guess…Namjoon and Jungkook. Unfortunately or fortunately (however you view it), BTS was the only group I was able to fully get into and know. I love and listen to other groups like TXT, EXO, ATEEZ, Red Velvet, TWICE, etc. But I never got fully into them to the extent I did BTS.

As for other fics or posts you might see around here, I am a hard-core weeb. So, you might see some anime character’s on here. However, with a recent off-the-bandwagon mishap since entering uni, it has been quite a while since I have even watched a show. I intend to get back into it. We will see where life takes me.

So, yeah! I hope you like what I end up posting! Feedback is always appreciated. If you have any questions, feel free to reach out!

Again, I do not tolerate hate, disrespect, or anything malicious on my blog. If I suspect or if it is outwardly posted that someone intends on coming after me or anyone else on this blog, you will be reported, blocked, and otherwise removed from my page. Please remember human decency and practice being kind to others!!

Other than that, happy holidays and happy new year! 휴일 잘 즐기고 새해 복 많이 받으세요!

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wonkyreads · 1 year

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I used to write reviews here instead of just Goodreads. I’m hoping to going back to that, but to be honest, I moved last year and don’t have space for my books. This means I stopped taking pictures for the BPCs, so I stopped taking pictures of my recent reads, so posting here felt pointless. I like ranting here, though. Next year, I will attempt to keep that up.

For this year, take an end of the year top worst and best. (And keep in mind these are obviously just my opinions! This list also doesn’t reflect the books I DNF’d because I don’t consider them read personally.)

Top 10 Worst Reads of 2022

10. The Themis Files by Sylvain Neuvel

- So this is a sci-fi trilogy where a girl accidentally discovers a giant mecha hand buried deep underground and grows up to be a scientist and studies/digs up all of these mecha pieces. The first book is genuinely good, but the arguments and plot lines the author decided to take with the rest of the series progressively pissed me off more and more, though. Not a bad series, just ultimately not one I enjoyed.

9. A Little Life by Hanya Yanagihara

- I feel I’m gonna piss a fair amount of people off with this one, but it won’t be the last time in this list. With how popular this book is online I don’t feel the need to explain what the plot here is. The writing of this book was beautiful, definitely, it was the content I couldn’t stand. I’m a fan of angst. This was not angst. This was throwing a shelf’s worth of terrible things into a sack and shaking it up to see what happened. This was actively attempting to make people feel things in a way that felt so over the top and transparent that I found myself hardly caring at all. To me, this reeks of romanticizing queer trauma and just trauma in general. I’m just not here for it. Show me redemption or healing, they’re harder to write anyway since it seemed all Yanagihara cared about was the mechanics behind the story and not the story itself.

8. The Kite Runner by Khalid Hosseini

- This book is kind of a modern classic and it’s just… I’m not sure how I was supposed to sympathize with the main character. This is the story of Amir and Hassan, two boys in Afghanistan in the 70’s. Hassan’s father works for Amir’s, but the book spends a large amount of time trying to guilt you into feeling bad for Amir, our main character. That’s kind of the whole plot (without spoilers) as I remember it if I’m being honest. The writing was fine and I’ve liked Hosseini’s books in the past, I just disliked the main character so much it kind of ruined everything. I disliked feeling guilty for not liking him. It all kind of got in the way of the message for me.

7. The Bodyguard by Katherine Center

- Hannah’s a bodyguard and Jake’s a down-to-earth movie star who seems to have a stalker problem. I adore the concept, but I think my main problem with this book is that I hyped it up for myself and told myself I’d love it. That and the premise felt like a promise of some kind of danger and by the time anything actually dangerous happened it was so ridiculous I laughed at it. It’s the over-the-top kind of romance I tend to not like, though. I fully admit to skimming the epilogue because I also kind of hate romance novels that do that.

6. We Are the Brennans by Tracey Lange

- Sunday Brennan gets into a drunk driving accident and then must swallow her pride and move back to New York where her large Irish Catholic family pretends they don’t need her either. This book is about family secrets, but all I really remember about it is that it did this really bad, gimmicky thing where every chapter ended with the same exact sentence, usually dialogue, that the next chapter began with. When it’s done a couple times to show that we’re in the same scene we just left only in a different perspective, or better yet the two perspectives don’t hear the dialogue the same way, it’s fine. But it was every single chapter. Every one of them. I’m also super picky about domestic drama books like this. Hard pass for me.

5. A History of Wild Places by Shae Earnshaw

- Honestly, I’m not sure how to some this up without spoilers so I’ll just say it’s a cult-y mystery told in multiple time lines. This is the second book I’ve read by Earnshaw and both were promising starts with disappointing developments for me. For me, the book was too predictable to be satisfying and, worse, often it felt like the most boring option was constantly being chosen. The concept was originally very promising, but the closer I got to the end and realized the twist wasn’t going to be fun or interesting, the more reading the book started to feel like a chore.

4. There’s Someone Inside Your House by Stephanie Perkins

- Oof. I don’t know how I picked this book up and didn’t expect it to be a teen slasher. I’ll watch a slasher any day of the week (including the movie made from this book), but reading them is kind of boring. You know the tropes, so when they’re followed it’s anticlimactic. I also found some of the character interactions hard to believe, which didn’t help raise my opinion any. I’m just harsh on thrillers and any books involving “small towns.”

3. Summer Sons by Lee Mandelo

- When his BFF Eddie, and definitely not his boyfriend, dies of apparent suicide, Andrew moves into Eddie’s old house with Eddie’s friends to find proof that Eddie’d been killed. There’s also some supernatural stuff and dark academia themes. This is another opinion I feel will make enemies, and it’s one I’ve actually posted here before. I read this book so early in the year that I’ve forgotten most of the specifics about it. What I remember disliking the most, though, was along the same lines as A Little Life. So much felt like it was just there to romanticize queer pain and what was left outside of that was a disappointingly slow mystery that didn’t really surprise or scare me. I think the conversations this book attempted to have were interesting, I just also think it failed to pull it all off. I didn’t believe or feel these characters. I didn’t care for how much it read like Ronan (of The Raven Boys) fanfic. I was consistently annoyed with smart characters avoiding the plot line or making idiotic choices. Also, I’m still traumatized by how obsessed literally everyone was with Eddie, I’m genuinely avoiding books using that name now. All around, absolutely wasn’t for me.

2. Dating Dr. Dil by Nisha Sharma

- Romance is not my genre. Romance that is so over-the-top crazy unrealistic is super not my genre. This book follows Kareena and Dr. Dil in a retelling of The Taming of the Shrew. Kareena is supposed to get married before her younger sister and her family is pressuring her, also her dad is selling her childhood home. Dr. Dil hosts a TV show and wants to raise money for his community clinic. I disliked Dr. Dil so, so much and Kareena was so inconsistent. The book felt so unedited and contradictory that I was constantly annoyed with it. The balance between show and tell was nonexistent; you can’t tell me what these characters are and not back it up and expect me to like them or believe them. People’s reactions were crazy over-the-top sometimes and if I have to ask of people actually act like that in real life, I’m already frustrated. I adore The Taming of the Shrew. I could watch 10 Things I Hate About You on repeat. I wanted to love this book so, so badly and was so utterly disappointed in what I got.

And last, but certainly least:

1. Verity by Colleen Hoover

- Verity was one of my most recent reads (I, regrettably, listened to it while icing sugar cookies for Christmas) and it follows Lowen attempting to write the end to a book series she’s never read before by snooping through the original authors memoir manuscripts. Or something. I have never read a Colleen Hoover book before and bought this one through audible years ago because everyone seemed to love it so much. This book has a 4.4 rating on Goodreads. I would just like to know how. Honestly. Talk about unbelievable characters! There were so many unnecessary gratuitous sex scenes in this book and just.. laughable suspense. A lot of the “twists” in this book were so predictable, but I do have a few questions; namely, how the fuck did Jeremy’s milquetoast ass get two women to become so obsessed with him so fast? Also, do people actually think like Lowen does? Holy shit. No really, I have SO many questions and I’m fairly certain none of them are the kind Hoover intended for me to have. I could go on for hours but I’m attempting to avoid spoilers and also it’s a fairly loved book and I don’t want to verge into the territory of yucking someone’s yum or anything, I just genuinely don’t understand. 4.4! Jesus Christ!

#booklr #top 10 worst #my reviews #the Themis files Sylvain nuevel #a little life hanya yanigihara #the kite runner Khalid Hosseini #the bodyguard Katherine center #we are the Brennans Tracey Lange #a history of wild places Shae Earnshaw #there’s someone inside your house Stephanie Perkins #summer sons Lee Mandelo #dating dr Dil Nisha sharma #verity colleen hoover

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dowagersqueen · 11 months

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Just to make it clear I didn’t mean people are being dramatic because they’re getting attacked. Of course everyone is allowed to defend themselves and no one should ever be attacked over fictional characters. And this is exactly why I said everyone is a bit too dramatic because on one side as a Helaemond I get hated for being a Helaemond and on the other side I get excluded for not agreeing or liking the "Helaena’s children are Aemond’s" theory. The fandom in general is such a mess and everyone is so on edge about every little thing. Fact is not one ship in Hotd is unproblematic. Whether it’s Alysmond, Helaemond or Helaegon all three of these ships have some kind of sketchy vibe on them. Though I have to disagree that everyone should suddenly be okay or comfortable with incest just because it’s one aspect of the show. I mean rape, misogyny and other bad things are also inherent to the show but that doesn’t mean we have to like or be comfortable with it. A large age-gap is not the same as incest imo so again I do understand why not everyone is on board with Helaemond or any other incest ship for that matter. What’s not okay is to attack someone because they ship it. I think the only ship that really really makes me uncomfortable and that actually deserves the hate it gets is Lucemond tbh.

well, if it helps, you won't get hate from me for not believing the children theory or not wanting it to be true specifically as i wasn't its biggest rider either. i mean i've always considered it a realistic possibility, but as an alicent fan i cringed at the amount of hate that would double because of it because she's a "hypocrite", even tho the circumstances are different from viserys.

i've gradually came to embrace it and just psychologically prepare myself to get jumped for still standing in my girl's corner.

however recently i've also started to post about it just because of people see it as a reason to bully others. like you will have people post that picture of that supposed jaehaera casting next to aemond and say something really mild like "copy paste" and get death threats but a post that puts her next to aegon and says "she got x from her dad" doesn't. imagine if i started commenting about people also supposedly "romantcizing incest" and lowkey dismissing the possibile dub con of jaehaera's existance as a child of a forced marriage and use this to say really shitty stuff like "go kys" and "stop using children to fulfill your nasty fantasies"

so because i always saw it as a realistic direction the show could take i said fuck it, let's post some about this and spite some people. because hypocritical bullies should get pushed back down on their asses every time.

(however if it does become canon, i'll likely be in these kids' corner trying to protect them from b&c and discourse w my bare hands 😂)

but still... i don't think the hate one might get for being a helaemond shipper but not a children theory supporter (whoever sent you hate / bullied you over that sucks) compres to the hate campaign ran against helaemonds as a whole for months by alysm*nds. and now by helaeg*ns too.

gonna have to disagree w the incest aspect tho simply bc many if not most antis who hate helaem*nd support helaeg*n or some other form of incest, like aegond, rhaemond, etc. in fact i had someone try to explain to me that it's not the same thing if they're cousins. and still, i would hope that universally anti incest uncomfortable people would spend their time blocking and muting rather than, idk, sending anon hate. seems more productive to me.

anyway this is getting long but i think my bottom line is this: i get that you probably had some experience maybe that you felt you were sidelined for not believing in the children theory and i think that's valid, but looking at the bigger picture, the helaem*nd fandom is, for a lack of a better word, stressed out and while i myself have my own gripes w opinions of other helaem*nds on certain things, i also kind of get how things can get tense

but to come back to this: if you don't think that the children are aemond's, or don't want them to be aemond's, that's fine with me!

#asks

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lovphobic · 1 year

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10 13 20 26 38 and 49 for all of them, or if not, whoever you want to yell about most (^:<

SO MANY!! (explodes)

10. What kind of jokes make them laugh?

sildraste: in my head i imagine her as a very stoic person. closed off and reserved. no vulnerability. but thats not... necessarily true? she'd probably like.. jokes that dont really make a great deal of sense, or jokes we think are absurd. think feeding the donkey a fig and washing it down with wine :') - thalya: she is VERY pure of heart. and very childish. almost every good natured joke will make her laugh. knock knock. whos there. owls. owls who. yes they do. (loud, from the heart laughter. knee slapping) - morant: it is SO hard to make her laugh. it has to be a GENUINELY funny, original joke. she takes herself too seriously sometimes - valdys: she'll laugh at someone tripping on the sidewalk (not out of meanness) and also "deez nuts". she's like.. the other side of thalya in a way. except shes more immature than childish LMAO

13: Describe your character's typical wardrobe for the regular day

OK so i am NOT great at describing clothes myself, so this is going to be very image heavy

sildraste: i have been workshopping her outfit for two years now.. and i still dont really know. im kind of tinkering w the idea of her being more feminine presenting? not sure how i feel about it just yet bc, as i said, i cant facking think of outfit ideas. anyways, that being said: outside of the Usual Dnd Chaos And Battle, like.. After her story is said and done. i guess i could see her in something like this for sure. DURING her story.. i hope u do not mind me not using my entire brain for this one question and instead using an existing picture... but something like this maybe! - thalya: pre sildraste it was something like this for sure, just replace the skirt for whatever the dnd equivalent of jeans would be LMAO. but post sildraste i can imagine it as something like this. i can definitely see her reverting to pre after everything is said and done though :^) - morant: you know, for a character that is pretty much my self insert.. my mary sue... she does not dress like me at all! shes very dark colors, slacks and long jackets/cloaks. think this and this. i hate to say it but shes definitely d*rk ac*dem*a. - valdys: MODERN 70s!!!!!! COLORS. BELL BOTTOMS. FLARE SLEEVES. LIKE THIS!!!! she is the only one i know FOR SURE. shes definitely modern, like what we'd wear today. but w the SPICE and FUN of the 70s

20: Does your character have a comfort item?

sildraste: oh you KNOW its thalya's necklace. as destructive as it is (which she doesnt. like. Know.) its definitely her comfort item - thalya: i think either she doesnt have one, or she is a bit too new for me to have figured an answer out! so, right now, she does not! - morant: dagger :) i havent figured out the importance yet, but its there - valdys: in direct mirrorage of morant.. there is ZERO importance at all to her item. she just thinks its neat and it brings her happiness. her chicken plushie. i imagine it looking something like this. this answer may change in the future but it is what it is for now!

26: Are they an animal person? Do they have pets?

sildraste and morant i wouldnt say are animal people. they Like animals, but i cant see them owning one. i could only see them owning a pet if its co-owned with their respective partner

thalya is DEFINITELY an animal person. she may have been a jeweler's apprentice but she also spent a fair bit of time with the farm animals of the town, helping out and being a general ray of sunshine always. no pets though, currently - valdys would have a cat 100%. one of those stupidly fluffy white ones that shed like a motherfucker. this cat. specifically.

38: How does your character unwind after a long day?

sildraste: ngl she probably gets wasted. it is what it is. always been like that. get her some therapy - thalya: quite the opposite. probably takes a nice bath. rose petals if the day was especially long/hard. - morant: she doesnt. she just goes to bed - valdys: most of her "long" days come from her mothers bullshit. she makes little imaginary vlogs for her imaginary audience alone in her room which 100% consist of what would be called trauma dumping. JGHDKJGHDK

49: What is your character's biggest fear? Most irrational?

sildraste: funny that. its losing thalya. LOL. shes a very rational person for the most part though. despite everything - thalya: she definitely has fears.. but how do you in sound mind have fears when you were this close to being dead. in comparison that makes whatever fear(s) she has seem so infinitesimal. her most irrational though is probably just.. being hated. nobody hates her. shes not a hateable person. which in itself is... something to think about. how can a person have Nothing to dislike. what are you hiding. what are you compensating for. - morant: dying <3 but i think valdys is her irrational fear FKJSDHFJKSAHFUIASHJFKSDH. morant "HATES" her and thinks valdys also hates her. but valdys is stupid pining. morant though. thinks she is plotting to murder her in her sleep. there is miscommunication here unfortunately. she is stupid - valdys: shes pretty fearless i wont lie. but the answer would probably be being misunderstood. she doesnt always come off on the right foot. but shes earnest. her irrational fear though..

ok i cant think of anything. so sorry. but i got to the end and this is the only one i said "hard give up" on. so please applaud me

#this took me almost 2 hours. what being a non-creative will do to a mf #snail mail

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8outof10productions · 2 years

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Locations

My final list of locations is, MDRC in Milford, The Water’s Edge Rathmullan, Millies Bistro Milford, Brenda’s Hair and Beauty Milford, The Traveller’s Inn Milford, the home of Connie McGrenaghan who played Katie Higgins, Milford Athletic Grounds at Moyle Park, Council Offices Milford and the car park at LYIT. This project was a lot of calling, texting and meeting people about locations. taking pictures on my phone, then come back for test shots, then come back and shoot for real. I’m 36 and have worked in all of the pubs in the town at some stage, the butchers too, on building sites, and sat about enough pubs to get to know a few characters that I could write a book on. I suppose just over time in a small town you get to know everyone, if you get on with them, which can be a problem in Milford where everyone poetically hates one another, not like Ramelton with their community spirit, none of that down our way, they’d sell their mother for a pint on a bad day and their children on a good one. The thing is, I’m only a bollocks myself, I know my own kind, anyway, I digress. I am very thankful to all the business people and home owners that allowed me to use their premises for the pilot.

The Water’s Edge Rathmullan is currently getting ready for the market, I told John the owner that it’d be good publicity for the place if a few people see the video so that worked out a treat. It is some location. I would love to shoot a scene in the restaurant with the glass front although, I did use it for a pan when Kevin is on his way to his room. That room has some view, if I make any more episodes or add to this one it will begin the morning after the night before, Kevin will be having his breakfast at a table by the window with the view in the background, it would be a beautiful shot, it just didn’t fit this episode, it could be a good selling point when going for funding, having locations like this.

The Water’s Edge currently has no power so I relied on natural light coming through the windows and the LED for fill and to light the actors faces and person. I was very lucky that the weather was good every day I was shooting.

MDRC Milford stands for Milford & District Resource Centre, they have some offices that they rent out and others that they use themselves doing all kinds of stuff, accountancy, book keeping, printing and other things. I know Declan Meehan who is the manager there. Declan ran in the last council election as an independent, just narrowly missing out, he’s only young, he will get in the next time, probably a future T.D. He was happy to help out, he’s very involved in the community.

The location was good to shoot in, good natural light coming through the windows, I still used the LED lights though, only one of them, just for a fill. The downstairs room at the very beginning has a bit of an echo but it’s not too bad, the upstairs room had better acoustics for recording sound.

Millies Bistro/Brenda’s Hair & Beauty I made the set for Notions Cafe out of these two closed down business’s that belong to my close friends mother. I asked her about the bistro or cafe initially, but upon going there to check it out, realised that it was jam packed door to door with all kinds of crap, all the stuff I wanted was still there, the coffee machine, the counter, tables and chairs and heaps of other little props that you can see in the photos on the Notions post and in the pilot.

The lights that were already in the hairdressers were quite good, I had ceiling lights above, light coming in the large front window and the small decorative lights around the mirror behind the counter, I used the LED lights to light the actors faces.

The Traveller’s Inn Milford 40 yards across the road from the house I grew up in, my father has sat in the same stool since he moved to Milford 40 years ago, he had cancer last year so he didn’t sit in it for a while, but he’s back in it now a few nights a week. I remember Donegal winning the All-Ireland in 1992 in that pub, my friend Marc’s parents ran it at the time, I was only 6, walking in through them all, everyone celebrating, them all drunk, me and Marc sneaking into the store for 2 football specials. Good times. When I was 14 my brother ran the Traveller’s for a few years, I started doing the bottles and stuff for a fiver a day then got in behind the bar to work even though I was way to young. It wasn’t Football Special we were sneaking out of the store now though, it was Vodka and whatever else we could drown ourselves in, way too young to be doing that too obviously and they wonder why I am the way I am hahahaha. I used to do runs up to the bookies for all the drinkers too, betting on horses and the pools in the football. Then when I turned 18 I started drinking in there legally. Michael McBride owns it now and I get on good with him, he runs a good ship, he’s made big investments in the place and has it looking great, got the restaurant up and running again, added a coffee shop, taking full advantage of the tourism in the summer. I haven’t been drinking much lately on account of trying to get this pilot finished but I’ll get a bellyful of Guinness in The Traveller’s at the weekend when it’s all done.

The bar in the Traveller’s is perfect for a scene like this one, although I’d suggest painting it a different colour if I had funding to make a series, there’s a lot of green in there that I only really noticed when I shot footage in there. The lights on the walls are nice, I had them all on as it was quite dark in there and it also gives depth to a shot. There was a round white light on the ceiling right above the bar which we covered with some baking paper to dull it a bit as it was clashing with the other warm lights and was very bright on the actors faces, the lighting was decent in the end although tricky. The fire is behind the drinkers, so to emulate the light of the fire we had an LED behind them for most of the shoot with the temperature on warm for an orange glow behind the drinkers. Although it’s a class location, it is quite small and pokey, hard to get a good angle sometimes, hard to get the width, my 18-35mm lens worked out good though. It’s the scene that took me the longest to edit because I ended up getting too much footage and didn’t stick to my shot list enough on the night, this made me much more regimental in every other scene, I done up a shot list, done test shots and stuck to the list on the day of the shoot, it saves time shooting and editing, lesson learned.

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life-with-geo · 4 months

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January 8th

Hi, I’m back (almost started with hi guys, then remembered I have no followers lmao). It's been a week since I posted last, and I think I'm going to start posting every Sunday at 9:30 PM, essentially right before I go to bed. To be honest I don't know how long I’m going to be able to keep that schedule up, I might be taking on too much, but hey, we shall see, things change all the time.

In the week thats passed, not too much has happened. School started back up on the second, unfortunately, and I’m already drained. Ever since my visit to the hospital, everything is so much more draining than before. I hope eventually I’m able to pick myself back up from this burnout, but apparently, the time it takes to recover from burnout is about 3-5 years. I don't have 3-5 years to heal from all this lol.

We had a project due the day after we came back to my AP Lit class, our personal portfolio. I had a lot of fun writing it over the semester, but I also hated it. It took me through a lot of emotions and lore related to my past. I talked about my mom, my most recent failed relationship, and my failed friendships, all of which made me sad. I also talked about my grandma though, and my wonderful stepmom, so I think overall it kinda works out in a way. I think the worst part was putting the pictures into the binder. Pictures of my biological mom (you'll hear about her eventually) as well as pictures of my grandma. I may have been a little petty and attacked my ex in the portfolio, which is funny considering hes in that class and everyone can read them. I wonder if he will approach me about it, I doubt it, he's kind of a coward.

On a much more positive note, things have become slightly more serious with this guy I’m talking to. Some might say it is FAR too soon to be talking to another guy fresh out of a relationship, but it’s been over a month now since the last one, and I’m too much of an all-or-nothing person to be hurt by one guy for too long. Or girl. I just struggle with attachment stuff. ANYWAYS. He’s way different than any guy I've ever talked to, and tbh, its refreshing. He's kind and gentle, but also ambitious and driven. It's something I've always wanted in a partner. I really hope it goes somewhere because he is genuinely so amazing lol.

This week in the mental health section we have…journaling. Now I know a lot of people just say journal to get your feelings out there but people don't actually talk about the psychology behind journaling, the benefits of it, and WHY it helps. I know this is a pretty basic thing to talk about but its my first post with this little section added so bear with me, it's fine.

There are a lot of different ways to journal and different kinds of journaling, and it really doesn't matter which one you do, it varies on your needs and what you’re trying to prioritize. I personally bullet journal and have another separate journal for my thoughts and feelings. So a lot of people wonder how journaling can actually be beneficial and I did a lil bit of research and fouuuuund… depending on the kind of journaling you do, it can be either just a release of emotions, it can help track symptoms of mental illness (or physical illness if you suffer from medical conditions, you can track if it’s getting worse or not, especially helpful in cases of people with chronic illness, but again, it varies person to person). Journaling can even help to identify negative self-talk that you may do unknowingly, and you can put in the work to change those negative thoughts into something positive. (All of this information is from a study posted by the University of Rochester Medical Center).

So to focus on the benefits of regular (“regular”) journaling, I’m mostly just going to talk about how it can be done and what to recognize in your journal entries (ITS ALWAYS HELPFUL TO GO BACK AND REREAD THEM EVEN IF IT HURTS, you can see how far you've come, and see what’s changed and whats benefited you throughout your writing journey). Journaling can be instrumental in the progression towards certain goals, as it is an internal reflection, slightly different from a diary, which can be defined as writing about the events of a day, and is mostly a daily thing. Journaling doesn't have to be a daily thing, it can be something you do more often when you’re having a rough time, with long entries full of crossed-out words and scribbles, versus the times you’re doing okay and when the entries are shorter and the words are neater. Either way, journaling is very good for self-reflection, helping you identify triggers and other things that may cause you any amount of emotional stress.

I think my favorite kind of journaling is bullet journaling, which I’ve only been doing for a short while but it’s very different from my thoughts and feelings journal. My bullet journal is something I use to keep track of assignments and also my habits, my reading, and things I've watched, I might start using it to track screen time. I also use it to track the story I’ve begun and this blog as well. It’s becoming very helpful when it comes to the planning of my future and the progression of my goals. I personally never found my thoughts and feelings journal to be very helpful when it came to goal progression, but it’s different for everyone.

One of the best parts of a bullet journal is the creative freedom that comes with it, of course, that’s not for everyone, and some people may simply choose a more minimalistic setup, or they may just not bullet journal at all, but that’s seriously one of the most therapeutic parts. Its a very chill process, I personally stole my setup from a YouTuber who I like, so it’s not my own creativity, but thats something Id like to do someday.

Anyway, that wraps up this week's post, we shall see how this does, I might mess around with the length of posts, as this one got pretty long. See you next Sunday :)

#beginner writer #wattpad #wattpad story #writers on tumblr #journal #journaling #journal entry #mental health #positive mental attitude #coping skills #coping mechanism

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coreytravelogue · 8 months

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Ode To My Travel Companions

It has been awhile since I have wrote in here, I did write something awhile back but decided not to post it as it was laced with the kind of emotion I don't like putting here all that much. While I know I have broken the internal rule of keeping my demons away from this blog multiple times I still try to abide by it.

Tomorrow marks the 9 year anniversary of my trip to Europe and I know what you are thinking. For fuck sakes Corey enough with talking about Europe 9 years ago. One year from now will be 10 years since maybe celebrate it then, and how about a novel idea of doing another trip. You are right and all in due time.

I wanted to write at least something for August and the idea came when my jacket's zipper broke. For a moment I got really depressed because this jacket is more than just an ordinary jacket this jacket is my travel jacket. After the initial worry of losing my jacket was overtaken with sheesh Corey just replace the zipper but it got me thinking of the 4 items I take with me on just about every trip and how much they mean to me and feel like this August would be a good time to pay homage to them because they all come with a backstory and oddly enough a very similar backstory at least in theme. Of course they are all linked through travel but linked in what they meant to me at the start and how it evolved. Lets start my 2 most obvious companions.

in 2012 and 2013 I often attended a live podcast called Geeks VS Nerds, during the intermission they had a raffle. I started to notice that they never mixed up the bowl before picking from it so I decided to spend 20 bucks on tickets right before the raffle and I was winning every time. It became a thing till they figured out how I won of course. Most of the stuff I won I gave to my friends at Nerd HQ as a way to level out my karma plus most of the stuff I didn't want anyway. However one of if not the biggest prizes I won was a hand sown version of the Jayne hat, the hat on the left side of the picture.

For those who like me at the time I didn't know what a Jayne hat is it comes from the show FireFly, a show I am not much of a fan of outside of what the meaning of the hat or what it meant for me.

youtube

At first I did not want the hat, what would I do with hat like that that barely keeps my head warm and from a show I didn't care for? I even tried to give it away to a friend of mine, Dani. However Dani didn't feel comfortable taking it. I would like to think she instinctively thought that me and this hat should not be separated and that life had bigger plans for me and it than with her but chances are she probably didn't want the hat either.

Not long after that though I decided to travel to Europe and it didn't take long for me to figure out what I could use this hat for. I love the movie Amelie and always found the gnome around the world thing was a neat thing and thought why not do that but with hat. I was the only one I knew with that hat, everyone knew I had that hat and I hate taking selfies of myself so this was a best of both worlds.

However a few months before the trip I realized that I should buy a back up, just incase I lose the one I had and that is where the Jayne hat not he right side of the picture came from as I bought that one at a comic book store a month or so before the Europe.

The rest is pretty much history with my 2 Jayne hats, they have accompanied me in just about every place I have ever been to except Whitehorse because I for some stupid reason forgot to bring them. They are a staple of my travels and at times what drives my travels. I do not know if travel feels the same without those two with me.

This picture has a lot of history behind it and always makes me a little emotional, it looks like just a typical photo and it is but is more I know what I was thinking and feeling at that moment and no one could know it unless I told you. I won't tell you today but I also show this picture because you see the last two items I wish to pay homage to; my travel jacket and my messenger bag.

A month or so before I went on my trip my parents visited me in Vancouver for the last time and decided they wanted to buy me my travel supplies to make sure I was prepared. We went to a store called Atmosphere and I needed a jacket. The thing is I only had a jean jacket which is good for summer but not for winter and I had a winter jacket which is only good for winter obviously. I was going to be traveling in September, October and half of November. I needed a jacket that was light enough to not smother me during the late period of summer but warm enough to get me through all of fall. Of all the jackets the store help shown me it was that jacket that seemed right to me. I can't really remember why but I know the biggest selling point was inner pockets. It's hard to find that in jackets anymore but it is very important to me especially during traveling front pockets are easily pick pocketed however inner jacket pockets lower that risk at least a little bit. I know that was the biggest selling point of the jacket. I am pretty sure I didn't want it because it was too expensive and I didn't like my parents buying this stuff for me but they didn't care. So the jacket was mine and has remained mine ever since. Unlike the other 3 items I use this jacket the most and all through the year or at least when the weather is fine for it and given it is Vancouver this much of the year. Like my hats I can see myself ever not having the jacket in my life though I know of all of my items this jacket will be the first go given how much I have used it and much wear and tear is on it already. When it is no longer useable I will still keep it with me, in fact I may even want to be buried in it if it makes environmental sense. That is how much I love it and how much it means to me.

Lastly is my messenger bag. As I mentioned I was a part of a group called Nerd HQ and during my time there some of us did something called craft exchange where it was nearly a secret Santa. I suck at crafts but I thought it would be a good way to make pies for someone. I made 2 pies for one person but someone ho was my friend Tara's friend made me this messenger's bag. I feel so ashamed of myself now but at first I didn't like it. Like with the hat I thought what the hell would I use this bag for? There is no buttons or anything it looked like it had no real practical use. it took my friend Tara to sit me down and give me a well deserved tongue lashing to realize it is the thought that counts and you should be grateful someone put this much effort into something like this for you. She could not be more right, it did not take long for me to warm up to it and again once it became obvious I was going to Europe this messenger's bag immediately had a use and that bag became absolutely invaluable to me. I had a camping backpack but that is too large and bulky to bring everywhere I needed something compact, light and portable to carry stuff and that bag was absolutely perfect in so many ways. Perfect size to carry vinyl records and it had 2 inner pockets, one for my iPad and another was originally for my phone but over time became became the battery pocket. I cannot stress how much I love this bag now. It is also the most fragile though so I only use for travel.

So those are my four travel companions. 4 that have accompanied me on most if not all of my travels in the past 9 years and I hope for the next 9, 18 or 30 years. Doubtful but I will cross that bridge when I get there. They are and remain important pieces to me and my life.

They are constant reminders that sometimes you need to give something/someone a chance to reveal it's worth or you will miss out on so much. Sometimes what you want is not exactly what you need. I don't know if I will ever learn that lesson fully and it will always wind up hurting me.

So with that what is next. I plan on going to Edmonton and Victoria in October, I know yawn but you can't imagine how hard, expensive and stressful it is to travel right now. I could give you a story as to why but I am waiting till the trip that has given me grief is happening occurs to tell it.

There is of course another trip to Newfoundland but that is nothing new either. I know I have promised to do lots of travel over the years but there are a lot of underlining as well as obvious reasons as to why I haven't. Barring something seriously bad happening to the world and/or me I will be traveling in 2024 and it will be somewhere different, unique and/or fun. The plan is Japan, to burn all of my leave split between Newfoundland in December if I am still in Vancouver next year and Japan in November when I turn 40. If I am living in Newfoundland at that time then I am spending as much of my leave time as I can on Japan and leave a little time off for Christmas.

If not Japan, then Australia if affordable (which the tin of itself is doubtful) and if neither of those places are doable or affordable I am going back to Europe again because even though I have been to many of the places there at least twice I know I will have fun there and it would feel even sweeter to be back there 10 years later but I do want it to be Japan. Japan has always been #1 on my list but I never did. There is no better time than now or next year to finally see that place to cap off what has been period of highs and lows for me in my life that is my 30s. Till the next time shazbot nanu nanu.

#Youtube #Spotify

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eazy-group · 9 months

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Gata lost 67 pounds

New Post has been published on https://eazydiet.net/gata-lost-67-pounds/

Gata lost 67 pounds

Transformation of the Day: Gata lost 67 pounds. When she realized that her mobility was being impacted and routine daily tasks left her in pain, she knew something had to change. She had VSG surgery, changed her habits, and now she’s living a more pain-free life.

Social Media: Instagram: @gata.tale.2.tell TikTok: @ThaGataNegrra Twitter/X: @goGoMewbari Facebook: @ThaGataNegrra

What was your motivation? What inspired you to keep going, even when you wanted to give up? My motivation was the fact that I was miserable. I felt my movement was restricted – which is not good when you are a stage performer. I think the last straw was when…

a) I looked at a picture of myself that was taken at a pop culture convention.

b) I couldn’t make it even the equivalent of three or four blocks from my house without my back seizing up and needing to sit down and rest before continuing.

Seriously—I couldn’t even pick up my daughter from her afterschool program without pain. Something had to be done.

My motivation was literally seeing the numbers on the scale and tape measure dropping every week. It was being able to walk longer distances and go shopping without pain or having to sit down. It was the freedom of a pain-free back. And it was the fact that I was fitting into clothes I hadn’t worn in over ten years.

I had a Vertical Sleeve Gastrectomy (bariatric sleeve) and joined The Order Of The Sleeve in August 2020. I have no regrets.

How did you change your eating habits? I had the gastric sleeve procedure, so my eating habits radically changed. At first, it was nothing but protein shakes and water, then pureed foods. I chose the cleanest foods possible, even with protein shakes. I didn’t want anything with artificial sweetener or too many ingredients I couldn’t pronounce.

Also, when I began eating solid food again, I tried to ensure my meals were protein first, as is the mantra for anyone who has had this surgery. I avoided bread and pasta. If I did indulge, it was in very small portions. I bought toddler plates and forks and used them to help me eat slower and be mindful about enjoying what I eat. I also used chopsticks to help me with this as those literally force you to eat less and slower than usual–and I used them already, anyway. Chopsticks give you time to realize that you’re full and satiated, and you can leave what you didn’t finish.

In addition, I used Baritastic’s neat little timer, but in reverse: I used it to count the space between each bite instead of how long I needed to chew. It also had a timer for waiting in between drinking and eating.

It was important to me that I get over the leaving-food-on-the-plate thing. That habit is ingrained in our culture and tied in with so much guilt from our caretakers. I had to change my thinking around that.

What is your workout routine? (Cardio, weight training, Zumba, etc.) I am currently easing back into using the recumbent bicycle and a Scoop lateral trainer because I have osteoarthritis in one knee. I am also hoping to weight train again soon. I have fallen off, even though I still try to walk as much as I can. I’m revisiting dancing—hip-hop, belly dance, things like that.

How often did you work out? At first, it was five days a week on the recumbent bike. Now it’s way less, but I’m changing that now. I hate that I’ve slacked off, but every time I do something ungodly to my osteoarthritic knee, I freak out and do less than I want to.

What was your starting weight? What is your current weight? My starting weight was 252 pounds. My current weight fluctuates between 185-193 pounds. For some reason, I look a lot smaller than I actually am.

What is your height? I am 5’4″.

When did you start your journey? How long did your transformation take? I started my journey, really, in October 2019. We had to take six months of nutrition classes and counseling on what kind of life we’d have after the procedure. When the six months were up, we were full into Corona Year, and elective surgeries had been discontinued. I didn’t have the surgery until August 26, 2020, two days after my birthday. I lost nearly 70 lbs (66) in just under a year.

What is the biggest lesson you’ve learned so far? The biggest takeaway was that I needed to be gentler with myself. I struggled for a long time with the fact that other women who had done the procedure at the same time or after me were dropping like 80 lbs in six months. I called them “Bariatric Rockstars”, LOL. Not everyone can be a rockstar. So I learned to accept that my journey is MY journey for a reason. I’m still glad I lost what I did. I feel better. And I’m not done.

What advice do you have for women who want to lose weight? I’ll say the same thing for any woman on her weight loss journey: BE GENTLE WITH YOURSELF. You are not always going to have good days. Your journey is just that—YOUR JOURNEY. Focus on your NSV—Non=Scale Victories—when the scale isn’t doing what you want. You’re still losing. You are not your scale.

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thirty-and-hurting · 1 year

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I created a blog just for this?

I kind of hate my brother.

We were always pretty close when growing up. He's just about a year and a half older than I am. We lived in a pretty rural coastal town (that was a mouthful) and lived a relatively normal life.

Our parents separated when I was just over a year old. We shuffled back and forth between mom and dad every other week.

My brother has had severe anger issues most of his life. At least, that's how I remember it. He's been mad forever, and if you dare cross him when he's in a mood, you're going to get hurt.

Somehow, though, when we were teenagers, we both found ourselves living with our dad, and we became closer than we'd ever been before. We still fought and he still took his anger out on me physically any chance he had, but I always just assumed those were normal sibling things. I think what helped us get so close, is that it felt like it was him and I against the world.

Our dad had a girlfriend back in the day, and they were together for 10 years. They were terrible together. I still to this day don't understand why they stayed together as long as they did. They very obviously hated each other. They would get into screaming matches, and his girlfriend made it obvious that we were not her children and she didn't love us. She was nice to me sometimes, cause I was the quiet child (until I turned into a teen).

Anyway, we fought a lot with her, and it felt like it was just my brother and I against the world. When he graduated high school, he went to college for about half a semester before dropping out and moving to a big city, about 7 hours away. We kept touch almost every day. It was just me alone in that house, and I needed a way out.

I got myself kicked out of school and then he asked me to move with him. I had JUST turned 18 and all my friends were going off to college and I couldn't stand the thought of being stuck in that shit town without any of them, so I packed my bags and moved in with him.

From there, everything was pretty much normal. I think we had a very normal sibling relationship, nothing was really out of the ordinary aside from how verbally abusive he was to his girlfriend at the time.

Fast forward a few years, and he had a psychiatric episode. The doctors called it a drug-induced psychosis, but we're still not entirely sure that they were right. For months after his psychiatric episode, he would still have delusions, which was really fucked up.

He turned into someone I didn't recognize. Borderline homelessness, begging and manipulating everyone into giving him money because he couldn't cook for himself, and all he did was play video games and order food off of uber.

At this point, I also turned into someone I didn't recognize. I was an almost fully formed adult! I had a good job that paid me well, great benefits, I met and married the love of my life, bought a condo, got a dog. Everything was coming up Milhouse. I was proud of myself. I had finally gotten my life back on track after struggling with mental health and addiction issues and I was so excited to share my life's journey with my family over a group messenger chat.

It unfortunately didn't take very long to realize that my brother didn't give a shit. I still can't to this day bring up something positive in his presence that will get an appropriate reaction out of him. He has completely ignored every milestone in my life. Birthdays, anniversaries, homeownership, marriage. Nothing. Radio silence.

There's a lot more to get into here for people to be able to get a fully formed picture of who my brother is at his core and what my issues with him are, perhaps I'll save it for another time, or perhaps I'll just delete this after posting.

TLDR; my brother was my best friends for a good part of my childhood and early adulthood, then shit went sideways and he resents me for no reason

#family #family issues #drama #family drama #journalling #journal entry

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noctumbra · 3 years

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𝘸𝘩𝘢𝘵 𝘺𝘰𝘶 𝘯𝘦𝘦𝘥

summary ─ you took a deep breath and opened your mouth to answer him when the idea struck you. his offer.

pairing ─ bestfriend!bucky barnes x reader

warnings ─ smut, +18, bucky is also the reader’s roommate, kissing, oral sex, making out, beard burn, dirty talk, sexy pictures, lingerie shopping with bucky, cam sex, OF accounts lol, friends-to-lovers, mutual pining, i don’t know shit about creating sexy content jsyk lmao, very light choking

a/n ─ inspired by this ask! spider nonnie had blessed us with this great idea. edits and yellings happened and here i am lmao thank you @nix-akimbo for the edits, i drooled and screamed and had to change my panties:) hope you like it! please leave a comment if you do! thank youu!! (pictures i used for bucky are edits from, again, @nix-akimbo <3

p.s.: so sorry for the delay! enjoy 5.2k words of filth! pls let me know what you think

It was sort of an off day for both you and Bucky. After having to deal with all the exams and applying to colleges, today was a calm and relaxing day for you. Bucky offered to go somewhere where you could both just be outside and have a change of scenery after holing up in your rooms or dragging yourselves from one class to another. You agreed easily.

His choice was Central Park; he was claiming that some green and soil under your palms might do you good, and you couldn’t see why not. With a small picnic bag kind of thing, you went to Central Park and sat down on the thing sheet you brought from home. It was very nice out; the sun was smiling down at you people and there was a soft breeze. You could hear birds chirping, kids playing and dogs barking. It was peaceful.

“God,” you heard Bucky groan. “I could say ‘fuck it’ to going to college thing and live out here forever.” You chuckled.

“I don’t think you’d like out here very much in winter,” you said as you grabbed a strawberry and handed it to him. With a soft hum, Bucky took it. “Though I wouldn’t say no to the ‘fuck it’ part.”

Bucky frowned. “What? Why?” You sighed. It had been troubling you for some time now, and even though your parents said that they would be supporting you, you still didn’t like the idea of making them pay for your schooling.

“College is expensive as fuck, James,” you grunted quietly. “It’s expensive which means that I have to get a loan, and it’s gonna be a huge problem when I graduate.” Sighing again, you bit into the strawberry in your hand aggressively. Bucky didn’t say anything, opting to stay silent, you continued after swallowing the juicy fruit you just bit.

“I mean,” you started. “I’ll probably apply to some of the scholarships, but I doubt that I’ll get one. M’parents said they’ll help me, but I don’t wanna be a burden.” You watched Bucky changing his position. Your mind was racing to find some brilliant idea that was going to help you get through this money issue. Scholarships were very hard to get, you could work ─ it was more likely to be happen anyway ─ or you could just let your parents crush under your college bill. You snorted when a thought struck you, causing Bucky to give you a confused look. “I might start an OnlyFans account. Seems like it’s the only way to earn some real money to get through college properly.” Bucky grimaced for a second, and then his face got thoughtful. When he looked back at you, he started snickering.

“Okay,” he agreed, grinning. “But promise me that if you ever want to create content with someone, it’s gonna be me, alright?” You chuckled. You knew that Bucky had a crush on you during your first year in high school, but he was over it now was what he said a year ago.

“You just want to have an excuse to kiss and feel me up, Barnes,” you said playfully. Bucky shot you a cocky smirk, causing you to laugh.

“Joke aside, I mean it,” he said after your laughter died down. “Those kinds of things are dangerous if you don’t know your partner. So, I’m offering myself. You know me.” You nodded slowly. Deep down, you knew he was right.

“Yeah, well,” you murmured. “I’ll let you know if I ever decide to do such thing.” Bucky shrugged.

“You have my number, honey,” he said, giving you a soft smile. He had a dreamy expression on his face. You ignored the butterflies in your stomach that the pet name provided and pushed him back from his shoulder. He went down with a yelp.

“Stop thinking about me naked,” you grumbled. Bucky laughed.

It was a nice day.

Looking back, you probably should have taken him up on his offer. This year was your last in college, graduation was crawling close with every breath you took, and the closer you get to your graduation day, the more stressful your days were becoming. You were drowning in your loans, your rent and your share of bills were waiting for you to pay, your job at the library was on a shaky boat…

It was totally pure luck that you and Bucky were in the same college and decided to be roommates because dorms were too crowded and loud. He was understandable about your money issues, he didn’t have any problems with it since his family was actually rich. It was very nice of him not to force you to pay your part although it didn’t stop you feeling guilty about it.

“Earth to Y/N,” you heard a deep voice and jumped on your seat. Bucky was looking at you with a small smile, worry was waiting to take over his face around the edges. “You alright, honey?” You hummed approvingly, nodding at the same time.

“Just thinking,” you said, closing the book you’ve been trying to read for an hour now. “Got lost in my head.” Bucky didn’t say anything but continued to watch you. The worry was slowly taking over his face. “I’m fine, Bucky, really.”

“Look,” he started, “I’ve known you nearly for nine years now, so I know when something isn’t alright. What is it?” You sighed. You hated bothering him with your money issues because you knew that he was just going to offer to pay everything himself, and just let you be his roommate without having to pay anything ever again. You couldn’t have that. You also knew that he wasn’t going to let you go if you didn’t tell him what had been going around in your head.

You took a deep breath and opened your mouth to answer him when the idea struck you.

His offer.

You looked at him. The corners of your lips were curling upwards slowly as the expression on his face got more confused and worried.

“Why are you looking at me like you are about to kill me?” He asked, tentatively taking a few steps back. You grinned. You probably looked like a psychopath right now, but if he was still up to it, this thing was going to help you a lot.

“Do you remember the conversation we had in Central Park while we were still in high school? It was a week after the applications,” you explained. He frowned for a second.

“We had a lot of conversations that day, honey, be more specific,” he said, and you nodded. He was right. You’ve stayed there for hours and talked about thousands of things.

“We were talking about how expensive the college is and I said I might start an OnlyFans account? You made me promise that I’ll come to you if I ever wanted to create content with someone. Remember now?” You watched his eyes grow wide with a smirk.

“Um,” he stammered. “Look, I’m definitely on board with that, but I want you to know that I can cover you if you want, alright? Like, y-you don’t have to post pictures or videos of your body just to pay rent, I can handle it, okay?” Your smirk turned into a soft, fond smile.

“I know, James,” you murmured softly, “Thank you.” Then, you stood up from your seat and walked up to him. Your fingers trailed over the sharp cut of his jawline, nails scratching his scruff. “Even though the main reason of why I wanna do this is paying my share of rent and bills, but I won’t say no to get laid. God knows I need it,” you scoffed at yourself. “So, are you going to help me, James?” You looked at him through your lashes. You could see that his eyes darkening and feel his jaw twitching.

“You really want it to be me?” He asked. You nodded. Other than casual hook-ups, both of you were single, and you lived in the same apartment so, it was supposed to work perfectly. Bucky’s eyes darkened more like it was possible and stepped forward to press his body against yours. “We gotta set some rules,” he said as he brushed your hair back gently. You shivered. You’ve been this close before, he shouldn’t have been affecting you this much, but fuck him, he was.

“Okay,” you whispered. He smiled and leaned in just a little bit so that your lips would brush against each other. You gasped softly.

“Yeah, I know what you need, honey,” he whispered, and then smiled. Pulling back, he gave you a smirk. “Gotta go, but we’ll talk about the rules tonight,” he said and in ten seconds, he was out.

“Fuck,” you whispered as you let your body fall back onto the plush couch. Suddenly, you weren’t so sure about the whole thing because you knew he was going to ruin you for all the other men. “I’m fucked,” you whined.

Royally, you added in your mind and whined a bit more.

──

It was a week later when you decided to start.

Like he said, you talked about all the rules and things about what to do and avoid, and then you set up an account. Bucky went and bought a camera just for this purpose, and when you complained about it, he promised to use it for other purposes, too. After everything was ready, he took you out for a lingerie shopping.

“You’re already sexy as hell, honey,” he had said, “but we gotta make you look even sexier. I have an eye, y’know it, so I’m gonna help.”

Now, you were in a red colored lacy number with garter belt and fishnet stockings adorning your legs. You had shiny leather gloves that went up to your mid-upper arms. You decided to forego the shoes, and Bucky agreed. When you were done with putting on everything Bucky bought for you, you looked at yourself in the mirror.

You looked fucking sexy.

“You ready?” You heard Bucky ask and took a deep breath. You couldn’t help but feel nervous because Bucky was about to see you in a fucking sexy lingerie. He was about to your ass in its all glory since you were wearing a thong. “Y/N?”

You got out of the bathroom before you could convince yourself to give up the whole OnlyFans idea, and honestly? The look on Bucky’s face made it damn worth it that you didn’t back out.

He straightened up from where he was sitting on the edge of your bed. His eyes went dark quickly. His face darkened, and you saw his lips parting before his tongue peeked out to lick his lips very invitingly. His now-almost-black eyes moved down and up and down again on your body, and he took a deep breath.

“Motherfuck, Y/N, you look so fucking sexy,” he grunted, it was actually very close to a groan, your brain noted. Bucky took another deep breath and held his hand out to you. “C’mere, baby,” he whispered. Shivering lightly, you walked up to him, taking his hand. His fingers wound into yours immediately, squeezing just a little, and he pulled you forward.

With a gasp, you fell onto his lap, arms wound up around his neck and his arms around your waist. His body was so warm, so solid and big under you, you felt like you were very close to fainting.

“Damn,” he whispered, “You were already beautiful, and now in this thing? Fuck me, you have no idea how gorgeous you look, love.” You whimpered just a little, scooting a bit forward on his lap, plastering your own chest to his. His white, wifebeater was only providing you a nice view of his bulging biceps and giving you a little peek of his pecs. His sweatpants, however, they were doing very little to hide… things.

“James…” You breathed. Bucky cursed under his breath and pulled back just for a second to reach behind you. You knew he started the recording, you knew that there would be a little red light blinking at you; you shivered. This was so unlike you, but you wanted to it. Wanted to do it with Bucky.

“Ready, love?” He whispered, and you nodded. “You know what to do if you wanna stop or take a breather, right?” You nodded again. “Tell me your safeword, sweetheart.”

God, you thought, he’s laying it thick on pet names. “Winter,” you whispered. He placed a kiss on the tip of your nose, making you chuckle lightly.

“Good girl, honey,” he whispered and it was fucking on.

He leaped forward to catch your lips with his, moaning loudly in relief when the soft skin of his lips touched yours, you arched into it. His hands were roaming all over your body, nails dragging lines and making you shiver, while his hands were occasionally grabbing your ass and slapping it lightly. You moaned into the kiss when you felt his tongue licking on your bottom lip, and you felt it slip inside when you gasped.

Bucky already had you putty in his hands, you realized, and you wondered what you were going to be in when he was done with you.

“Alright,” he said with a low voice. He gathered you up in his arms and stood, turning around, he placed you in the middle of your bed. “I’m gonna take some pictures, that okay baby?” You nodded, teeth already digging into your bottom lip. Bucky watched your face a couple seconds; his thumb saving your bottom lip from the abuse of your teeth and he stroked it slowly. You poked your tongue out to lick his thumb, and then closed your lips around the digit. “Shit,” he cursed. “Pictures,” he grunted as he pulled his finger out of your mouth. You giggled.

He grabbed his phone that was sitting on your bedside drawer. He did a quick work on opening his camera app and looked at you. “Turn around. Lemme see that peach, hm?” You felt heat licking all over your body as you gasped. Slowly turning around, you pulled your knees under you as you stretched your arms forward to grab the headboard. This position gave your back a beautiful arch, you knew it.

“Goddamn,” he whispered as he moved himself around to get a good light for the picture, and you heard the soft ‘click’ sound a few seconds later. You looked at him over your shoulder, lifting your head just a little. You heard another ‘click’. Smirking, also feeling that you were gaining some sort of self-confidence, you placed your knees apart from each other on the bed, spreading them widely.

“God-fucking-damn, sweetheart,” Bucky groaned. He shuffled and pressed ‘click’ a couple times. You buried your head in the bed and deepened arch of your back, wiggling your ass playfully. Bucky hummed. He reached out to grab one of your cheeks, to dig his fingers into the soft flesh, and you gasped with the sudden touch. Click. Bucky hummed again and slapped your ass lightly. You moaned, pressing against the touch of his large and warm hand, you lay down on your chest.

Bucky trailed one finger down from your crack to your pussy. “Soaking it already?” He asked, voice low and hoarse. Lust, your brain realized, making you moan. Bucky rubbed you there with his thumb, over the soft fabric, and his other fingers dug themselves into the meat of your ass. “On your front,” he said, slapping your ass again. Swallowing a whimper, you did as he said.

“You look so fucking beautiful,” he whispered. You hummed and arched your back again, giving him a nice view of your chest. Click, click, click. Smiling, you lifted yourself up on your elbows. You could see that your effects for the pictures did not go waste: Bucky was hard and tenting his sweatpants. You lifted one of your legs in the air and pressed the sole of your feet to his stomach, right over his abs. You saw his cock twitching under the fabric, and your smile turned into a smirk.

“Drop the phone,” you whispered as you maneuvered yourself onto your knees, still facing him but also facing to the bulge in his sweatpants. Bucky did as you said and put the phone on the ground. “Lemme see you?” You asked next while pulling your gloves off. Bucky nodded and pulled his wifebeater off in a second.

He was a fucking god.

His beautifully tanned and smooth skin and taut muscles were blinking at you cheekily. You could see a faint happy trail leading to his cock. His arms were a bulging muscles and veins mess, and you wanted to trace those veins with your tongue.

Instead, you leaned forward and nosed his happy trail. His low groan and cursing were deaf to your ears because all you were focused on was the bulge that was touching your chin. You shuffled a bit forward and pulled his sweatpants down to his mid-thighs, making his cock slap against his stomach.

Thank fuck for Bucky Barnes and his love for going commando.

You’ve watched his dick swinging so many times when both of you were home. You’ve seen his dick both erect and flaccid through the thin fabric of his sweatpants. Finally, you were seeing it naked and all in display for you to play.

“Love,” Bucky whispered as he brushed a strand of hair away from your face. He sounded turned on. Good, you thought and grabbed his cock. Nosing right under his cock head, you inhaled the natural musk smell coming off of him. You were so goddamn wet just by smelling him, you knew deep into your fucking bones that you were ruined for all the other men already.

Tongue poking out, you licked him clean with slow, kitten licks. Bucky cursed. He couldn’t tear his eyes off you; he watched you as you wrapped your beautiful lips around his cock, watched your tongue licking him from root to top.

Bucky was going fucking crazy.

“Y/N, holy shit,” he moaned when you took him in your mouth. His eyes closed briefly as he tossed his head back with the pleasure. You hummed and bobbed your head up and down. He felt so nice, so thick and full in your mouth; you never wanted to let him go. Bucky grunted when you swallowed around him. He was already so damn close, it was embarrassing.

“Baby,” he said. “I’ll come if you continue to do that again.” You made a soft sound. You wanted him to come in your mouth, but there was this whole video thing to go through, so you pulled off. Bucky, always good at reading you, stroked your cheek. “Some other time I’ll let you have it in your mouth, alright?” You nodded. He smiled. “Move up,” he commanded, inclining his head towards the bed. You scrambled to follow his order. You spread your legs as soon as you were in a comfy position.

“I could eat you up…” He whispered. He crawled towards you on his knees, sweatpants ditched already and he was naked. He looked up at you, his dark eyes boring into yours intimately. Bucky nosed your clothed core. “Maybe I should…”

Whimpering, you wiggled slightly. He chuckled. It was a dark sound that sent chills down your spine. He grabbed your legs and threw them over his shoulder. Laying down on his stomach, he licked a fat line over the fabric.

“James!” You cried out. He rubbed his scruff covered jaw all over your inner thighs. His fingers grabbed the hem of your panties and he pulled them down, ripping them under the fishnet stockings and he threw them somewhere in the room. You gasped at the strength show. You could feel yourself getting even wetter. “Fuck,” you whispered. Bucky smirked. His tongue poked out to lick you clean.

It took you a second to realize that he was mimicking your ministrations on you. You let out a laugh which turned into a moan as the tip of his tongue nudged your clit. Arching your back, you grabbed his long hair. You knew he was good with his mouth; no mouth like his could be bad, anyhow.

“God, James,” you whispered harshly. He licked, licked, sucked and licked again, and you were going crazy. His beard was rubbing all over the slick and soft flesh, irritating the skin there. You were loving the fact that you were going to have some nice beard burn tomorrow.

Bucky slurped, licked you clean and flicked his tongue against your clit one last time before he pulled back. As much as he wanted you to come on his face, he wanted your first orgasm to happen on his dick.

You whined as he pulled back but purred in satisfaction when he laid on you, caging you under his big and muscle-y body. He was making you feel small and precious and honestly, you loved that feeling. It felt even better when it was Bucky.

“Lemme see them, yeah?” He whispered as he slowly peeled your bra off. Throwing it somewhere when it came off, Bucky didn’t waste any time to latch on to one of your nipples.

“Fuck!” You yelped at the sudden warmth around the delicate flesh, back bowing and chest pushing against his face even more with the new position. He flicked his tongue around, sucked and you felt his teeth nipping the flesh lightly. One of his hands was grabbing your other breast, fingers rolling the nipple. “Jaaames!” You whined, your fingers were still wound up tight in his hair. He hummed and pulled back with a pop.

“Fine,” he grumbled, turning your world upside down in a blink.

With a gasp, you were flipped around and were put on your stomach with your hips tilted up. Bucky’s knees were right outside of your thighs while your legs were as spread wide as they could. You could feel his hard cock right against your wet pussy, and you couldn’t help but moan and wiggle your ass a bit. Bucky groaned. His hips moved against yours, cock dragging up and down on your pussy as he reached for a condom. Both of you were clean and you were on pill, but he still wanted to make sure that you were not to get pregnant.

Bucky placed his hands on your waist and slowly moved them up and wound on of them in your hair. He made a fist, pulling them tightly to the side to expose your neck. You gasped and whimpered.

“Ready, baby?” He asked. You nodded. “You sure? Y’alright?”

“Yeah,” you whispered. “Yeah, ‘m fine, please.” Wiggling your ass against his cock, you moaned lightly. Bucky cooed at you softly, his free hand roaming all over your back in a soothing move. His fingers dipped into the holes of the stockings, ripping them just a little to make some room, and then he dipped his fingers inside of you. You cried out. Immediately clenching around the long and thick digits, you moaned.

“Fuck, Y/N,” Bucky cursed. “Tight as a fucking virgin, shit.” You hummed and canted your hips against him, practically riding his fingers. He made a sound of approval, removed his fingers and lined his cock up.

“Yes,” you moaned. “Yes, gimme!”

“Alright, love, don’t worry. I’mma give you what you need.” Swearing once again, Bucky slid inside of you with one slow thrust.

You screamed. Your back arched, hips tilted even higher and you clenched around his hard cock. Bucky cursed. His fingers were grabbing your hair tighter, almost making your scalp hurt, but you were loving the sting. You moaned and hummed as he started to thrust in and out. His pace was careful and slow, and remained like that until he deemed that you adjusted his length and width.

“God, shit, James,” you moaned. “You feel so good in me, so big…” Eyes closed, you threw your head back. Bucky responded your moan with his own. Just like you said, you felt so damn good around him. It felt like his cock was being wrapped tightly with hot silk. “Faster?” You asked, looking at him over your shoulder with wide eyes.

“Fuck,” he whispered as he let go of your hair and placed both hands on your hips for support. His hips fastened their pace. His balls, full to the brim, were swinging back and forth, occasionally slapping against your slicked covered skin. You were so wet that every movement of Bucky’s cock in you was making an obscene squelching sound. You could feel your thighs getting wetter with Bucky’s each thrust.

“James,” you whispered. “Fuck, James, ‘m close.” Your harsh whisper reached to his ear between the loud thrusts of his hips, and he grabbed you by the waist and throat to pull you up. You made a sobbing sound as the changed position made his cock drove in you even deeper. You loved the feeling of having him deep.

Bucky hugged you close to his chest; one of his arms was around your waist while the other was winding under your right arm, his right hand was loosely wrapped around your throat. You found the loose hand on your throat surprisingly grounding, and you sighed. Your hips flushed against his, you looked like you were sitting on his thighs in this position.

“Come whenever you wanna, love,” he whispered in your ear and placed a kiss on your cheek. The arm around your waist shifted on your hip, and he resumed his thrusts.

Having him way deeper was going to push you off the edge quicker than before, you could feel it. The tension in your belly was coiling with every single thrusts of his, your clit throbbing and your walls clenching around him; you were right there.

You sobbed. Your hands scrambled to grab any part of him; one of them wound up in his hair while the other grabbed the back of his thigh. “Yes,” you whimpered. “There!” You moaned when a little shift in his thrust lightened something up in you. “Fuck, ‘m─” Gasping, you swallowed the sob down. Your legs were trembling, pussy and stomach visibly clenching, you felt your nipples tighten up almost painfully.

“Oh fuck,” Bucky moaned loudly. His long hair was obscuring his face just a little bit, the ends of it tickling your shoulders. His scruff was rubbing against your neck, you could feel his happy trail against your ass, and with all these heightened senses you couldn’t hold onto your orgasm any longer.

You came on Bucky’s cock with a scream got trapped in your throat suddenly. Mouth wide open with a silent scream, your body convulsed and trembled against Bucky’s. If it weren’t his arms holding you upright against his chest, you would have collapsed face-first down on the bed, you knew it.

The spectacular fog of orgasm had covered your mind, making you vaguely aware of Bucky’s jack-rabbit thrusts. He was panting in your ear, hands tightened on your flesh and throat, you could feel his cock twitching in you. You turned your head to him lazily, still drowsy from your orgasm. Your hand on his thigh moved to his cheek to turn his face to yours.

“Come for me,” you whined lightly against his lips. You gave him a chaste kiss on the lips and whispered again. “C’mon, James, come for me.” Kissing him again, this time you bit down on his bottom lip and clenched your pussy around him tighter.

He gasped, his thrusts going mad as he moved his hips one, two, three more times before he stilled. Cock twitching, balls tightening up, he came inside the condom as his body crumpled forward. As he went down on the bed, he took you with him. Never letting you go, he cuddled you against his chest.

Five minutes later, breathing turned back normal, Bucky chuckled. “Goddamn,” he said and you grunted in approval. “You alright? Was I too rough?” You shook your head as you gave him thumbs up. He chuckled again. He rubbed your hips gently as he pulled out of you slowly. You grimaced as he did and watched him disposing the condom. He got off the bed, stopping the recording. “I don’t think this video will ever need an editing, but we’ll see I guess,” he murmured. He walked into the bathroom to grab a cloth to clean you up and himself, and then joined you back in the bed with camera in his hands.

“Shall we watch it before we upload it online?” He asked, brow cocked. You looked at him; his hair was a mess and his lips were red, his body had sweat glistening all over. He looked thoroughly fucked out, and you wanted to see him fucking you while looking like this for… who knows how many minutes. So, you nodded. “Alright,” he murmured and poked around the camera. You settled against his arm, head resting on his meaty shoulder. “Here we go…”

──

It was no surprise that watching fifty-six minutes of heavenly sex tape had led you to another round of sex. This time you riding Bucky into oblivion as he dirty talked the shit out of you.

At the very end, you decided to post the pictures first because Bucky was a bit hesitant about posting your very first sex tape online since it was ‘probably amateur’ and ‘you needed to get better a little’. You didn’t buy it, of course.

So, you cornered him only to learn that he didn’t want the video of you having sex with him the first time to be all over the internet, he wanted to keep it private. It was a very touching thought.

It only took Bucky to a little bit more cornering to admit that his crush on you back high school had never passed.

“Y-you… What?” You asked, feeling dumb. He chuckled nervously. “You have a crush on me ever since high school?” Feeling absolutely dumb, you kissed him on the lips. Bucky let out a confused noise but returned your kiss anyway. “You idiot!” You shrieked.

“What?” Bucky shrieked at you back. You kissed him again.

“I was depressed all those times thinking that you moved on from me!” You said, causing Bucky to freeze for a second. “I thought you moved on and I lost my chance…” You continued but more softly this time.

“Wait,” Bucky pulled back. “You like me back?” You nodded. He looked at you without blinking for a little while. “We are idiots. You’re in this shit with me.” You snorted as he rolled his eyes. But then, he leaned in to give you the softest kiss ever. You sighed happily. “So, are you up for a ‘congrats-you’re-an-idiot-couple’ sex?” He asked, face scrunching adorably.

Laughing, you climbed on his lap again and kissed him passionately as his answer. Bucky just moaned and indulged in it happily.

#bucky barnes x reader #bestfriend!bucky barnes x reader #bucky barnes smut #bucky barnes imagines #bucky barnes fanfiction #bucky barnes fluff #bucky barnes angst #bucky barnes x you #bestfriend!bucky #bucky barnes au #shameless

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theoreticslut · 3 years

Text

Mutually Curious // g.w.

george weasley x reader

requested: for @anxiousblanketqueen’s bday wc

word count: 3.8k

warnings: 18+ themes, mutual masturbation, slight dom/sub roles

A/N: hey loves! I’ve been wanting to post this one for like a week and I just never got around to it because finals are seriously kicking my ass. I am so stressed and so tired and I just want it all to be over with. But i also really wanted to get this out before Jill’s bday on wednesday (you should totally check out her blog and participate in her bday sleepover 💗) ! Ideally, I wanted to get all the fics out for her bday wc before her bday, but alas that is not happening. Oh well, she’ll just get some late presents 😂💗 Anyways, I hope you enjoy this!! Xx

You truly enjoyed days like this - where you had nowhere to go or nothing to do. You could simply lay around all day and do whatever you pleased without feeling guilty that you were avoiding something else.

What made days like this even better is when they were spent with your best friend, George. You two had been inseparable since second year, ever since you got seated next to each other in Charms class.

Throughout the decade you’ve known each other, your friendship has evolved in some rather beautiful ways. It started with pulling pranks and just having fun in each other’s company. Then you guys started sharing secrets and deep late-night thoughts. Eventually, nothing was off-limits for the two of you to talk about.

You both were just so comfortable with the other that it wasn’t odd to share intimate details that you’d hesitate to tell others. You knew each other inside and out, ranging from the basics of favourite colours and foods, to the more advanced knowledge of deepest fears and wishes, all the way to the ultimate comfort level of knowing each other’s preferences and stories from the bedroom. You just felt completely at ease talking to George no matter what the topic was, and he reciprocated that ease.

You two never run out of things to talk about, though, as you’re always finding out more about yourselves, whether that’s a new kink you want to explore or a new fact you learned.

Today was no different. Without even thinking about it, you’re voicing a rather interesting segway question.

“You know what I’ve kind of always wanted to try?”

“What’s that, darling?” George asks, looking up at you as he’s laid down by your feet.

“Masturbating with someone.”

You can just barely hear him let out a groan before he’s humming out an answer.

“Yeah?”

“Yeah. I just wonder what it’d be like, you know, being intimate and vulnerable like that without necessarily touching the other. Not that you couldn’t touch the other, though.”

You watch as he seems to think about your statement for a couple seconds, nodding lightly.

“Yeah, it’d definitely be interesting. I mean, it’s fun to tease your partner that way - you know, not letting them touch themselves while you get yourself off - but I’ve never really thought about both people masturbating.”

“I don’t know what I’d think about it.” You admit.

“I feel like it could be embarrassing, but at the same time it really does sound like fun.”

Frowning in thought, you lean back to look at the ceiling. You can only imagine what it’d be like to masturbate with someone present. All of that attention on you, basically putting you in a spotlight. You’re not so sure about that.

“Why do you think it’d be embarrassing?” George frowns as he props himself up to look at you. He’s known you long enough now to know that you don’t get embarrassed very easily. Why would you find mutual masturbation embarrassing? It’s not like you would be the only one doing it.

“I don’t know. I guess I’m thinking I might feel too exposed?” You sigh.

“Being naked in front of a guy, touching myself, having him watch? Like with sex at least his hands are on me so his attention is a bit divided. I’m not under his full gaze, you know?”

He hums, thinking about your words. He could understand how it could be uncomfortable to have a person’s undivided attention, but at the same time he thinks it sounds pretty great - having your attention solely on him as he strokes himself. And just the idea of getting to watch you pleasure yourself has him excited, his cock twitching happily in his trousers.

“We could always try it?” He offers, not hesitating to share his thought.

“What?” You ask, a bit incredulously, sitting up to look at him, meeting his gaze almost immediately.

“I mean, if you want to. It’s not like we haven’t talked about doing things with each other before, and we’d just be getting ourselves off. We wouldn’t have to touch each other if you didn’t want to.” He explains as he rubs at the back of his neck, clearing his throat as his cock grows at the idea of watching you squirm as you come undone in front of him.

You can’t help the little needy whine that escapes your lips, cheeks growing warm at the idea. You’ve only thought of George in bed with you at least a thousand times by now. There’s no way of stopping the thoughts of his cock and what it’d look and feel like from running through your head.

“And we’re already comfortable with each other, yeah? That could help you not feel so embarrassed.” he offers, hoping you agree. He’s only dreamt of you a thousand times by now, picturing what your body looks like and what your moans and whines sound like. It’s not uncommon for him to pop a boner at the thought of you.

You nod, understanding his thoughts. Honestly, there’s no one else you could imagine trying this with. While you’re embarrassed at the idea of your best friend seeing you naked and so vulnerable, the idea excites you to no end. You already felt safe with him, so why try this with anyone else?

“What do you say, y/n? You want to try it?”

You nod, a small whimper falling from your lips as you do. You never thought that you’d ever actually do anything with George, but Merlin have you wanted to. That’s one of the only downfalls of being so close with george - you can’t help but get turned on and want to see how true his stories are when he shares them with you.

“Y-yeah. Do you?”

“Godric, yes.” He moans, nearly panting already as he never turns his attention from you. If you thought you got turned on by his stories, you should try paying attention to him more when you tell yours. He’s constantly hiding an erection and trying to not pounce on you and make you his.

“O-okay.” You smile, already blushing as you gently chewing on your bottom lip as you figure out what to do first.

You figure that you should probably both undress first, so you cautiously grab the hem of your shirt, his eyes trained on you as he sits up.

Smiling and gently biting on your bottom lip, you slowly lift up the material to reveal your simple black bra to him, not able to stop the soft giggles from your lips as he groans.

“We’ve barely started and you’re already teasing me?”

“Not teasing you yet, Georgie. I’m just undressing.” You smirk, removing your shirt from your body.

He moans, eyes roaming over your exposed skin. Sure he’s seen your skin before while you wear shorter clothes in the summer, but watching you undress in this context for him is something he just can’t get over. He knows he’s not the first person to see your body, but that doesn’t matter when he’s the one who gets to see it right now.

“You’re so beautiful, darling. You know that, don’t you?”

You smile, a blush on your cheeks as you take in his words. You’ve been told by a number of people that you’re beautiful, but hearing it from George’s lips is otherworldly. It feels so much more sincere and intimate coming from him.

George smiles, watching as you melt at his words. He’s loving how absolutely adorable you currently look with a blush on your cheeks half undressed for him.

“Keep undressing, baby. I want to see you.” He urges, leaning back a little to spread his legs.

“Aren’t you going to?”

“Eventually, I promise. I want you to show me your beautiful body first. Can you do that for me, baby?” He asks, trying his best to contain a groan. Seeing you so vulnerable and pouty is more attractive than he would have thought.

You nod, smiling as you watch his eyelids droop in pleasure, a low moan passing through his lips.

You slowly untie the drawstrings on your sweatpants, smirking as his eyes follow every movement of your hands.

Carefully, you trail your hands over your body on top of your bottoms, enjoying the needy whimper that leaves George’s mouth. You grab at your inner thighs, purposefully avoiding your sex, loving the way that George is squirming in his spot.

Smirking, you slip your hands under the waistband of your pants, finally pulling them off your legs.

“Fuck, darling.” George groans, head lolling backwards.

He can’t help the grunt that leaves his lips at the soft giggles rising from your chest. He’s trying his best to behave, but all he wants is to take control of you.

“Georgie, you’re not watching.” You giggle, teasingly pulling the straps of your bra down off your shoulders.

“You’re being a tease, darling.”

“I would never, Georgie.” You smirk, loving the way his eyes darken at the sight of your bra straps hanging around your arms.

“No one likes a liar, y/n. Behave, angel, or maybe I’ll just leave you to get yourself off in front of me. Won’t let you see me.”

You whine, thighs clenching together at his threat as a pout forms on your puffy lips. George had mentioned he was pretty dominate, but you never expected it to be so hot, nor could you ever truly picture it.

“No. George, please don’t. I’m being a good girl. I promise.”

Whining at his dark chuckle, you watch as he situates himself a bit on the bed.

“Show me then. Show me how good you’re being.”

You nod, unclipping your bra and tossing it across the room. You grope at your breasts, a moan falling from your lips at the pure pleasure of it.

You hate to admit it, but from the moment george offered to try this, you had gotten extraordinarily aroused. You needed relief and you were finally getting some from your touch against your breasts.

“Such pretty tits, baby.” He praises, eyes glued to your chest and the way you wriggle under your own ministrations.

“Why don’t you take one of your hands, angel, and touch yourself through your panties? I bet your wet already, yeah?”

You whine, trailing your right hand down your body to the waistband of your panties, teasing it gently. You slide your pointer finger just under the band, enough to lift it from your skin and send shivers throughout your body, before you let it softly snap against your body.

“You like teasing yourself, darling?” George asks, restraining from touching you himself.

He just wants to see how wet you are. The idea of a wet spot growing on your panties while you rub yourself has him nearly wild.

You smirk, chewing on your bottom lip as you start to touch yourself, your fingers against your heat feeling amazing.

“Oh, George. Feels so good.” You moan, eyes shutting and head falling back against the pillows.

“I bet it does, darling. I bet you want to finger yourself right now, yeah?”

“Yes. Yes, George. I do.”

“Well wait a minute now, okay? You want to watch me undress, yeah?”

You nod lazily, trying your hardest to prop your head back up through your initial wave of pleasure.

He smiles, loving your blissed out face already as he lifts off his shirt. He smirks as he hears you hum in admiration.

Once off, he tosses it onto the floor and turns his attention back to you. He can’t help but chuckle as he watches your eyes trail over his torso. He knows he’s fit, having played quidditch for years, but having you admire his body has his ego rapidly inflating.

He carefully undoes the button on his jeans, slowly undoing the zipper and watching as you watch his every move.

He groans as he notices you slowly start rubbing your fingers over your pussy through your panties.

“So pretty for me, darling. Touching yourself while I undress. You’re so pretty, but you’re needy, yeah? Can’t even wait ‘til I’m out of my trousers.”

He smirks at the whine that leaves your lips, watching as your fingers slow down and you squeeze your legs together.

“M sorry, Georgie.”

“Don’t apologize, darling. I like how needy you are.” He smiles, watching you with pure adoration.

You blush at his words, unaware that he’s watching you intently as you watch his hands.

You whine as he slowly pulls off his pants, his boxers coming right along with them. You nearly drool as you watch his cock spring free from their constraints, and the groan that leaves George’s lips alongside it is pure heaven.

“Can you take off your panties, baby girl? Please?”

You nod, carefully hooking your fingers under the material on each of your hips, before swiftly sliding them down your legs, leaving you bare in front of your best friend.

“Godric you’re so pretty. Knew you would be, but bloody hell, darling.”

You blush, a whine slipping past your lips as he chuckles, grabbing the base of his cock.

“Fuck, baby. Show me how you make yourself feel good.”

You start at your chest again, softly groping each of your breasts and rolling your nipples between your fingers. You sigh gently at the feeling, registering George’s heavy panting across from you.

You carefully open your eyes to look at him, finding it difficult due to the pleasure coursing through your body.

You watch as he slowly strokes his cock, rubbing his thumb over the slit for a second or so whenever he reaches the top. Moaning softly at the sight, you slowly start trailing your hand down your body towards your sex.

Bucking against your hand as you reach your clit, you listen as George hisses, drawing your attention to him.

You watch as he grips his cock a bit tighter, his eyes closing gently in pleasure, falling backwards.

“You look so handsome, Georgie. Love when you throw your head back.” You giggle, loving the groan that leaves him and the small smile that forms on his face.

“You’ll be the death of me, y/n. The absolute death of me.” He smiles, watching as you blush and close your eyes gently while you play with your clit. This feels so much better than you could have imagined, your pussy already so wet and fluttering for george.

“Oh, George!” You gasp as you slip your middle finger past your folds, not thinking much about your actions anymore. whatever felt good is what you were doing.

“Ohhh, feels so good.” You mumble, starting to finger yourself as George watches intently, throat going dry. He wants nothing more than to take over for you, to finger you himself and to maybe get a taste. It’s taking everything in him to hold back, wanting to watch you pleasure yourself.

He watches as your fingers speed up, drawing you closer and closer to your release, moans and whimpers falling freely from your lips.

Before either of you truly realize it, you’re gasping as you come undone in front of him. You can feel your wetness seeping out of your cunt as the haze of pleasure slowly clears from your mind.

“That was so hot, baby.” George states, mouth softly closing as he watches you come to, his cock throbbing as he’s close to release himself just from watching you.

“Oh, George. Y-you haven’t cum.” You pout, looking over his face as he scoffs.

“I don’t care, darling. Seeing you come undone was more than enough.”

“But-“

“C-can I touch you? I want to finger you, baby. Please?” He asks, cutting you off from whatever argument you were going to give.

“You want to finger me?” You ask, a little surprised at his bluntness.

George nods enthusiastically, practically drooling at the idea. He can just imagine how warm and soft you must feel.

“C-can I touch you?”

“Merlin, please. Yes, y/n. Please touch me.” He begs, finding it hard to wait for your answer.

“Okay then. Go ahead, Georgie.” You blush, biting on your bottom lip as he practically pounces on you, fingers quickly finding your folds and running through them.

You jolt at the sudden friction, your previous orgasm having left you more sensitive than you realized.

“Hold on, George.” You gasp, grabbing a hold of his wrist to stop his ministrations.

“Are you okay? Did I do something wrong?”

“Didn’t do anything wrong, baby boy, I’m just sensitive. Need you to give me a second.” You explain, trying to catch your breath.

He nods, breath catching in his throat at the pet name. He’s had women be more dominant with him, but none have ever called him that. He never realized just how nice it could sound, but he’s sure it only sounds so nice because you spoke it. Regardless, he wants to hear you say it again.

“Okay, Georgie. Start gentle, please.”

“Like this?” He asks, his fingers barely touching you as he circles your entrance, occasionally dancing up to play with your clit.

“Just like that. Feels so good, baby. You can add a little more pressure if you want.”

You gasp, nodding as he increases the pressure in which he touches you.

“So good, Georgie.” You sigh, slowly reaching out for his cock between the two of you.

“C-can you call me that again?” He asks a bit bashfully, shivering as you faintly circle his tip with your finger.

“Call you what?”

“B-aby boy.” He gasps, your hand grasping around him tighter.

“Oh? You like that name, do you? Like being called baby boy?” You giggle, stroking his cock slowly.

“Yes.” He groans, bucking into your hand.

“Alright, Georgie, baby. You’re doing so good, but you can speed up now if you’d like to baby boy.”

He nods, finally taking control of your pleasure now that he knows you’re okay. He sighs as he can smell, and practically taste you, wanting more than anything to do so.

You quicken your movements on his cock as you feel yourself clench around his fingers. You want, more than anything, to make sure he gets to cum this time around.

“So close, Georgie. I want you to cum with me, baby boy. You think you can do that?”

He nods, bucking once again into your hand as you swipe your thumb over his slit, spreading his pearly precum around.

You can feel him twitch as you smirk, moaning as he leans up to start kissing at your neck.

“George.” You whine, eyes closing at how amazing his lips feel on you.

“Yes, darling?” He smirks.

“Who’s the tease here, now?” You pant, squeezing at his cock as you stroke him, loving as he shivers in pleasure.

“I th-ink it’s still you, baby.” He smirks, nipping at your neck.

“If you’re going to kiss me, can it at least be my lips?” You pout, wanting to kiss him so bad. You’ve always wondered what his lips would feel like against yours.

He chuckles, leaning up a bit further to capture your lips with his, both of you moaning at the sensation.

You can feel him twitch against you as you clench around his fingers, both of you close, but you had a feeling George was closer.

Sighing into the kiss, you squeeze your hand around the base of his cock, gently tracing the outline of his balls as he jolts.

“Fuck!” He groans as he cums, spilling his warm seed onto your thigh as you clench around him again, so close to cumming a second time.

“I’m so close, Georgie. Don’t stop, baby, please.” You beg, still slowly stroking him to milk his release.

With his eyes shut tight, he curls the two fingers inside you, perfectly hitting where you needed him to to send you over the edge.

“Yes, George!” You gasp, coming undone on his fingers.

He groans, eye shooting open although they’re heavy with his own pleasure. There’s no way he’s going to miss watching you cum around his fingers.

“So...pretty. So pretty, angel.” He mumbles, completely blissed out from his own release and then watching yours.

He sighs as he gently removes his fingers from your sex, groaning as he stuffs them into his mouth.

You both lay there for a few minutes, him laying practically on top of you as you both regain your energy and catch your breaths.

He’s the first to look up at you, admiring the post-coital state you’re in - happily playing with his hair and thinking with a soft smile fixed on your lips.

“So? What did you think?” He murmurs, watching you for your reaction.

You smile as you look down at his face, taking in how tired he looks.

“It was amazing, George. Something I’d definitely be willing to do again.”

“Yeah? I’m glad. I’m thinking next time we go all the way? What do you think?”

“All the way?” You ask him, quirking a brow in amusement.

“After you taste me, we get to see how my dick feels inside you.”

“Oh, so you just want to fuck now, yeah?” You laugh, pausing your hand in his hair as he chuckles, burying his face into your neck in slight embarrassment.

“Well, I’d kind of like to take you out on a date and ask you out if that’d be okay?” he smiles, muffled by your neck as he presses hot kisses to the skin.

“Oh yeah?” You tease, smiling just as he nips at your neck, sending a shiver throughout your body.

“Definitely. Best friends is wonderful, but I think we both know we want more, yeah?” He smiles, watching as you chuckle, a small blush taking over your cheeks.

“Just took us messing around to actually admit it.” He adds.

“Admit what now, Georgie?”

“That I want to be with you, as your boyfriend and maybe more someday. That I love you and always have.” He smiles cheekily, leaning up to kiss you as you giggle, pressing a soft kiss to his lips before pulling away.

“I love you.” You smile, absentmindedly picking up where you left off in playing with his hair.

You both lay in a comfortable silence for a minute or so, basking in each others love and body heat. You never expected your day to turn out like this, but you were glad it did.

“Thank you for trying this with me, but I agree, next time we go all the way.”

George chuckles at your words, a smile on his face as he presses a sweet kiss to your lips, his arms wrapping around you as he pulls you in close to him for a short nap.

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taglist - if you’re crossed out, I can’t tag you!

general - @accioalix @captaincactusjuice @inglourious-imagines @keepawaythenargles @lemongrasshoney @onyourgoddamnleft @valiantobservationkitty @concepcion @eternallyvenus @fandomwhoress @fleurho @fredweasleyzwh0re @harleigh110 @hufflepuffflowers @hufflrpuffforfred @i-miei-amori @littlemisswitt @sammy-the-gay @sightiff @starstruckgranger @teenwolfbitches2 @watermelonsugar2810 @harrypotterwifey @your-hispanichufflepuff @yikesyikesyikes95 @darthwheezely @callmelilone @teawiththeweasleys @justmesadgirl @xuckduck @filipi-yes @aestheticwh0r3 @siredkai @matsuno-nadeshiko @msmarklee1213 @immajustreadwritereblog @msmimimerton @perfectlysane24 @mischievous-queen @bunnyboo7 @grandeoptimist @daddystevee @slytherinxhunter @streetfighterrichie @just-here-to-escape-from-reality @isthereanymorejello @p0gue420 @hogwartslut @sebby-staan @fredshmeasley @catching-the-train-to-hogwarts

weasley family - @anxiousblanketqueen @rosietoesy @stoopidwithtwohoes @kaitlynw011 @livvysnaps

Weasley twins - @tovvaa @midsummernightdream @wand3ringr0s3 @tinylumpiaa @freddie-weaselbee @lovesanimals @pandaxnienke @stxrryxsky @fredweasleypls @georgeweasleyishot @melonoptimist @pineapplesandpinas @psychocracker @the-real-santana-lopez @zabinizucchini @andrea-23-5 @slytherinambitious @amourtentiaa @slytherin-7 @youralternatpersonality @teenagesublimefan @accio-remus-lupin @lindsaytriestowrite @missetbilu @pinkypurplemagic @leovaldez37 @chlo333w3asl3y @georgeswhore @weasleysprincess @snoopydoop1 @angeletarte @hpotterwhore @hogwortslut123 @impulse-anchor @celestialmage23 @gomi-owo @4amhotchner @weasley8800 @lilypad-55449

#JTR23 #harry potter #harry potter imagine #hp imagine #harry potter fanfic #hp fanfic #hp smut #hp fluff #george weasley #george weasley x reader #george weasley fluff #george weasley smut

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blueprint-han · 3 years

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[Image ID: A black picture with the title “HOW TO SUPPORT FANFICTION AUTHORS” written in bold caps lock, colored with a winter forest picture. End ID.]

Well, this post has been made countless times, but I’m making one too because I’ve seen a lot of people say they’re new to tumblr and don’t know the whole “reblogging is better than liking” rule and other stuff. So without any further ado, here are ways YOU can support the fanfiction authors. Now keep in mind this applies to almost every author out there, not just the stayblr fandom, so if you’re a silent reader (or even if you aren’t), I advise you go through this post. Warning, this is a fairly long post going into detail, so yeah. I still expect you, the readers to read this, and if you’re a writer, feel free to lmk if i’ve written smth wrong or if you want me to add something! ^^

In this post I’ll go into thorough analysis of the pros and cons of each of the methods listed here and how YOU as a reader can show the authors whose fics you read more love and motivate them to produce content.

WARNING; LONG POST! GOES INTO A DECENT AMOUNT OF DETAIL. NOT EDITED, EXCUSE ANY TYPOS.

#1 : LIKING !

I think this is basic common knowledge, and a lot of people tend to do this. When you like the post, the author sees it, you see it, and if the author has their liked posts accessible (which majority of the time they don’t), and if someone deliberately goes to check it, then they see it. See why so many authors say just liking does nothing? Only liking says “Hey, I’m gonna tell you your story is not that good by simply liking it and not sharing it with other people. :D”

♯ PROS:

You’re telling the author that you've read their fic, and either you’ve enjoyed it to a certain extent, or you’re just saving it to read for later.

Likes are seen by you, the author and anyone who has access to your likes (which, most people don’t).

♯ CONS:

If you ONLY like, you’re not really helping the author’s work reach a wide audience because this site isn’t Instagram. Reblogging is the only way people can SEE our works. I’ll cover more on that in the next section.

In a nutshell, liking is good! But you should most likely use it in a combination with the other stuff I’ve listed below, because just the like itself doesn’t really do much in giving the author any feedback or interaction on their fics.

To clear shit up; I’m not talking about those people who don’t read the story or appreciate it in the first place. I’m talking about those who appreciate the fic, like it, but don’t leave any sort of feedback to show that.

#2 : REBLOGGING !

This is SO, SO important. I cannot stress on this enough. Let me explain WHY so many writers stress on reblogging content:

Tumblr’s tag system is inherently fucked up, and has grown more so over the year. I’m not kidding, at first, the fic either used to show up in the tags or it didn’t, but now, sometimes your fic can be REMOVED from the tags because of,,, idk tumblr tag shit. Anyways, as you can see, it’s very demotivating for authors at that point, because the major way for people to find their content and expand their blogs has been blocked.

Due to this reason, tumblr authors need to RELY on you, their followers to help spread their works to a wider audience. Now again, before you get me wrong, I’m not saying you ae forced to rb our works regardless of whether you like them or not. BUT, that being said, if you DO infact like the story, there’s no harm in reblogging, right? By doing this you’re indirectly telling the author — “hey! :D I liked your fic! Which is why I am gonna share it to my followers so they can read it too :D” Trust me, you’re doing nothing but helping the people who produce content for you to read. Seems like a worthy cause to hit the reblog button, right? It’s only a one, or maximum two step procedure.

Leave tags in your reblogs! Trust me, as an author myself and as much as I know from all my author friends, we oft check the tags of your reblogs to see if you found any part amazing or even if you have anything to say about the writing we put so much hard work into. Even a key smash or a “This was so [insert adjective] 🥺” is enough to leave a smile on your authors face.

♯ PROS :

You’re !! Sharing !! Your authors !! Works !! This leads to them getting more recognition, so for the content they’re so graciously providing for free, you’re promoting their blog and helping them expand it.

If the tags are being a shit, which majority of the time they are, then you’re literally making an author’s day by reblogging! You’re showing them that you, a follower and appreciator of their works are willingly sharing their content because it deserves to be seen by more people. Again before any dumb people decide to attack me, i am talking about people who like the fic but don't bother reblogging and are silent/ghost readers. I am not forcing anyone to read anybody’s work.

YOU’RE MAKING YOUR AUTHOR SO HAPPY WHAT MORE REASONS COULD YOU POSSIBLY WANT !! 🥺

♯ CONS :

Literally none, because as far as I remember no author is against reblogging of their works. It’s quite literally the way this platform functions. Reblogging is IMPORTANT.

#3 : COMMENTING/SENDING FEEDBACK !

This kind of overlaps with the previous section, but THIS IS SUCH AN IMPORTANT STEP !! When you leave feedback, you are directly giving the author something so much more valuable to them than high follower/note counts or money. Your feedback is literally our serotonin. I kid you not the number of times I’ve received a positive comment and smiled and it has made my day. There’s a reason youtubers (though not the best example, bear with me here because it was the only one I could think of) ask people to subscribe, like and COMMENT. The subscription is like a follow, the like is ofc like a heart, and the comment is equivalent to an rb with comments in the tags.

You might argue and tell me that a comment is basically like an ask so the reblogging step isn’t necessary, but I’m sure 99% of you use YouTube and you know that more comments leads to people’s videos boosted in the stream/trending charts. This is what reblogging does. Reblogging shares the piece with other people like minded, which leads to a boost in reads. You are literally helping your author grow.

It’s quite literally the same thing as youtubers. Youtubers NEED validation to keep their content creation going, so do writers, so do other ccs on this site. This post is however, focused on WRITERS, so keep that in mind.

♯ PROS :

By doing this, you’re giving author valuable feedback! It’s similar to what you do in rbing with tags. Interactivity with their fics boosts their note counts and helps expand their audience, so srsly, now think of it: your one comment is playing such a massive role to help ccs create more content.

Imagine how much of a difference the note counts will be in when every person who simply likes after reading the fic, reblogs, leaves a comment and sends an ask. the note counts would be high on each and every fic, which is validation in itself, but your comments would inspire the writer so much more! Please, don’t skip the commenting part. Even a simple one like: “this is so cute!” is wonderful.

♯ CONS :

Remember, if you’re gonna give constructive criticism (which I’m sure you all are smart enough to know if different from hate), make sure the author is okay with it. Authors need to be in a specific mindset and must be ready to accept criticism, so if you’re gonna give constructive criticism to them when they’re at a low point, it may demotivate them.

Just commenting, instead of reblogging and commenting in the tags/ reblogging and then leaving an ask in their inbox, while it gives validation in plenty, will not lead to the author’s work being spread. Therefore I suggest either reblogging and commenting in the tags or reblog and then leave an ask, or comment under the fic!

!! reminder; I am not saying that if you don’t rb and just leave feedback, your feedback has no value. We authors truly appreciate every bit of feedback, but this post is aimed to help you learn how to interact with and support authors, and make them feel more motivated, because the current scenario of liking and scrolling is taking a toll on their creative abilities. Take it from a person who’s been writing for a year.

#4 : COMMSIONING VIA THEIR KO-FI/OTHER APPS !

Before any of you attack me, let me tell you that this is not a step that is 100% necessary to do. ONLY donate if you can and if you genuinely want to, and if anyone is forcing you to pay for something against your will, you need to get yourself out of there.

Regardless, if an author has a kofi and you’re able to and you want to donate, you definitely should! It’s also a valid form of support.

#5 : ADDING THEM ON REC LISTS/ RECOMMENDING THEM TO REC BLOGS

This is such an underrated option, to be honest. I can’t tell you the number of times I’ve seen my fic was recommended onto some rec list and it’s made me smile so hard. If you like some fics, create a rec list! They’re oft very popular amongst the fans too. Making rec posts is such a great way to share your favorite stories with others.

Rec blogs! I’ve seen a couple going around, and needless to say they are a great way to get someone else to read your favorite author’s work whilst also giving them your own feedback. These blogs oft accept recs via a form or ask box, and they leave your feedback along with their own, or else they’ll oft tag the author in the feedback post, so look! You’re basically helping your author share their fic to many more people, because you’ve given them feedback and a reblog.

♯ PROS :

Validation! Feedback! Reblogs! More exposure! Helping a blog grow! Spreading love! basically a run down of the stuff I’ve said before!

♯ CONS :

Literally no con of this. Unless, a one in a million case, this author says they don’t like receiving feedback/being tagged, and I’m sure NO person has said this before, at least none that I’ve heard of.

#6 : FINAL COMMENTS; MISC !

When an author points out about how the interactivity is drastically reducing, don’t just give them blind apologies. Yes, you feel sorry for not interacting as much, we understand, but rather show that you’ll become a better content consumer through your actions. We need to see that we’re not just throwing words into a void and that people are actually trying to be better content consumers.

Understand the fact that authors don’t get paid for this, and 99% of the time, these authors don’t take commissions either. They’re giving you novel worthy writings for free. Take Percy Jackson: You think the author would have felt motivated to write the subsequent parts, let alone two whole series based off of it if literally no one showed that they were interested? Rick Riordan has sales, he is being paid, there are millions of people and big agencies who provide him feedback. Now take that huge amount and simmer it down to an audience of maybe 10000 people This is what fanfic authors want. They don’t want your money, nor are they telling you to risk your lives for them. All they want is, a reblog, some tags, some feedback, some INTERACTIVITY. A sign that they aren’t throwing fics into the void and that people actually like them, some motivation to continue. Seems fairly easy to throw an rb with some tags, right?

Don’t bother to tell me that we do this for ourselves and we shouldn’t ask for likes and reblogs and feedback, because 1) you are consuming the content that we “write for ourselves” and 2) writers post their content here for interactivity and feedback. We could just not post and write and save our fics in our dungeon drafts for years. But we choose to post to entertain the readers, the consumers. And we aren’t even asking that much in return.

Don’t give me the whole “I’m scared that authors feel that comments are annoying” excuse either because seriously this has been DEBUNKED SO MANY TIMES. Istg, in the nicest way possible, if you still think writers are annoyed by interaction and feedback, after so many posts, long rants have been posted as to how we’re not, then you must truly be living under a rock. There, I said it. Please stop thinking this way, I’ll say it again, AUTHORS ARE NOT ANNOYED OF FEEDBACK, COMMENTS, TAGS, REBLOGS. WE LOVE IT. Saying this is like saying that the audience in a theatre play shouldn’t clap when the play ends because the actors would find it noisy. 🤡

I’ve seen some people saying they have anxiety issues and such, so pls note that I’m not invalidating your condition. If you’re trying to be more interactive, I really appreciate it! If you can’t, that’s fine too. You’re trying.

But for the people who have no reason other than feeling lazy to rb and comment, your lack of interactiveness is not excused. Please. Tumblr is a reblogging site. If you’re gonna consume content like authors are some sort of machines, I encourage you to go get some more perspective.

This site is not Instagram or the satan bird app. Your likes are appreciated but frankly speaking, they do nothing to the author except tell them “Hey i read ur fic but i'm not gonna support u :D” and honestly, that is detrimental to their creative capabilities and mental health.

DON’T FOLLOW AN ACC JUST TO MINDLESS RB THEIR SIGNAL BOOST POSTS AND THEIR REBLOGS OF GIFS AND NOT INTERACT WITH THEIR WRITING AT ALL ! Trust me, authors prefer a lower amount of interactive followers than a high count that doesn’t even give them any feedback. Again your follows are appreciated, but when you’re following, you know the type of content the author creates, so the author expects that the more followers, the more interactivity. These days, this is just becoming the opposite. So don’t do it! If you’re gonna follow to read, interact with their works. I promise, this will make both you and the author happy. A win-win situation.

In conclusion: SUPPORT YOUR FUCKING AUTHORS! THEY ARE NOT MACHINES THAT HAVE NO FEELINGS TO PRODUCE CONTENT FOR YOU! FICS TAKE DAYS AND DAYS OF PLANNING, PLOTTING, OUTLINING, WRITING, EDITING, MAKING TEASERS. SO JUST SHOW THEM YOU APPRECIATE THEM WITH AN RB. IT’S THE L E A S T YOU CAN DO.

I will be liking this post here written by the lovely @chaninfused and @scriptura-delirus . Please take time to read it because if you weren’t convinced by my arguments, you will see how much frustration we as writers face on a daily basis. Please, just show support. Here is the post by @stayndays about how to get more people to read your work, because it also has a note on reblogging. Please educate yourself, and put an end to this mindless consuming culutre and bring up some interactivity.

If you’ve read this far, I want you to go to two of your favorite authors and leave some feedback in their inbox, and tag me in it (either tag me yourself or ask the author to do so, they won’t mind). Show your writers that our words are taking effect and you are becoming better consumers. I mean it. I’m serious. I want every single one who reads this post to do this. besides valid reasons, if you’re lazy to do this, you’re a part of the problem. PLEASE get more perspective.

Also, feel free to add to this post! I’d love to read your thoughts too, remember to be kind though. And, if I think your rb is somehow contradicting my points and is bringing down the reason I made this post, I will politely ask you to delete your comment, because this post is about being truthful about the harsh reality of tumblr consumers and how we can change it. I’m sure none of you will let it get to that point, though. <3 love you guys. 💓

And, just a reminder, don’t just blindly like this too. Do what I said before, and while I am not forcing you, I’d appreciate your reblog, because seriously, it took me 3 whole days to write this, plus, I’m sure this will help more of your followers understand the fault in consumer culture. haha, that’s it! This post was way too long uff.

also, this is ur cue to not be stupid in my inbox. You have something to say? Think I worded smth wrongly? I’m sure it wasn’t my intention to do so, point it out with manners.

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angryfistman · 3 years

Text

kyotani x reader

No warnings

Summary: comfort with angry boy

Gender neutral reader

———————————————————————

Being friends with the big scary mad dog wasn’t as bad as other people were lead to believe. He’d occasionally share his lunches with you when you forgot yours (although you couldn’t get away from getting scolded by him.) He’d text you every morning to make sure you did your homework (so he could copy it.) Generally he’d always be there for you in his own way. Sure he wasn’t the most typical friend and maybe not always the nicest, but he was your friend nonetheless.

He knew you wouldn’t last with your current boyfriend. He made sure he told you that multiple times, much to your dismay. That is NOT something you wanted to hear from your friend. But he kept pressuring you into “just thinking about the future of your relationship with him.” You didn’t believe him when he had said he had seen your boyfriend with someone else. You thought it was just him being petty and overprotective like he had been before. Then he showed you evidence, several pictures and a video of him and the person you were always worried about, all in the same places you showed him and loved to take him to. Yeah. That hurt.

“I wouldn’t lie to you about that kind of stuff idiot” he had told you with a scoff. You really should’ve just listened to him then. Now you weren’t quite sure what to do as he showed you the pictures.

“I- oh. First of all I’m sorry I didn’t believe you.” You told him, genuinely feeling quite bad.

“THATS what you’re more worried about right now? That’s stupid.” He replied.

In response you said, “Well I’m going to be honest with you kyo, I’ve kinda been preparing for this since you tried to tell me last week. I didn’t really wanna face it but that night I realized it really wouldn’t be a stretch with the way he’s been acting.”

“The way he’s been acting? Have you been worried about this? Why didn’t you tell me?”

“Well you can’t exactly get mad at me! You were the one continuously putting my relationship down and doubting him! So my first reaction when I had troubles is obviously not going to be to go to you. Even if you were right in the end.” He scoffed at that.

Kyotani isn’t the best at dealing with emotions. His or others. So the only way he knew how to help was by saying,

“You wanna go check the park to see if they’re still there and you can watch me beat his ass?”

You laughed and responded,

“You know what? Honestly yeah let’s do it. Though I warn you I might get to him first.”

He smirked at that and gently shoved you forward to start walking to the park.

“What are you gonna do if we actually see him?” Kyotani asked. You sighed and thought about it for a minute before responding,

“I guess we will find out wont we. I haven’t really been in that situation before and it depends on how they react.”

“Makes sense.”

After about five minutes of walking you reached the park. Kyotani led the way to where they had been earlier in the day and then you saw them. Just like in the pictures, they were hanging out in the place beneath the trees you had shown him a month into your relationship. That kind of stung.

Before you could stop yourself you walked up to them and said, “Oh hey! Crazy seeing you guys here! Having fun?” with the biggest smile on your face. All they could do was look up to you in shock before your (now ex) boyfriend started to say,

“Woah hey it’s not what it looks like!”

“Oh really? What does it look like?” You said still with the smile on your face.

“I- uh- I’m sorry!”

“I don’t think you are. I really don’t. Most of the time I wouldn’t waste my time on someone like you but really? Cheating on someone? And one of my closest friends at that?” Kyotani said, stepping towards your ex in a threatening way.

Before Kyotani could actually do anything, you stepped up right in front of him and spit on him. The person he was with said,

“What? Are you a llama? That’s disgusting!”

All you said in return was, “I guess so! Baa bitch! Have fun with someone who cheats I guess! And before you get to say it, I’m breaking up with you dude!” And walked away with Kyotani following close behind you.

“I didn’t think you had it in you to stand up for yourself honestly.” Kyotani said.

“Excuse me? I am perfectly capable of taking care of myself! Plus I think you’ve rubbed off on me. As much as I hate to admit it.”

“That’s dangerous.”

“Tell me about it. Anyways! Wanna come to my house and play the new resident evil game? I could really use some simping for a tall scary woman honestly.” You asked. Kyotani nodded and you both made your way to your house.

After about an hour of playing resident evil and screaming about how much you wanted to marry lady dimitrescu, you had kind of settled down and started thinking about what had happened. You hadn’t really given yourself time to process that he had, in fact, cheated on you and that yall had broken up. Kyotani had noticed you were acting weird and sluggish all of the sudden.

“Hey? What’s wrong? You better not be sad over your ex now.”

“Well how can I not be? We were dating for several months. I’m not all that sad over it! Its just- it’s weird not having anyone to go to now I guess? Like there’s not gonna be the promise of dates or good morning and good night messages.”

“Are you dumb?” Kyotani asked.

“Excuse me?”

“Are you dumb?” He said again.

“You’re not gonna miss out on that stuff. I mean we could always hang out instead and if you really needed me to I guess I could text you good morning instead of just asking for the homework.” He said so nonchalantly that it confused you. You just stared at him with wide eyes.

“Who are you and what did you do with my Kyo!” You said loudly. He scoffed at you for the hundredth time that day and said,

“Well if you’re going to act like that I guess I won’t!”

“Wait wait no I’m sorry!!! Pleaseeee do those things!”

He rolled his eyes at that and said,

“I guess I have to.”

———————————————————————

SORRY FOR NOT POSTING GUYS I AM SO SORRY AGSHAGJAS HAVE THIS LONGER SELF INDULGENT FIC

#haikyuu #haikyuu x reader #haikyuu smau #haikyuu headcanons #haikyuu fanfiction #haikyuu fanfic #kyotani kentaro x reader #Kyotani #kyotani headcanons #kyo #Kyotani x reader #aoba josai headcanons #aoba johsai #aoba josai x reader #kyotani kentaro #kyoutani headcanons #kyoutani x reader

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nugnthopkns · 3 years

Text

i wish i could disappear

word count: 3.6k

warnings: explicit!fem reader, cursing, feelings of anxiety due to social media harassment, invasion of privacy that border on stalking

recommended listening: brutal | olivia rodrigo

series masterpost: here

a/n: and we're off to the races!! i love this album and olivia so much. there's a shoutout to goon by tobias jesso jr. in here bc it's my favourite album to cry to lmao (highly recommend giving it a listen!). i'm on the fence about this one but am posting it anyways because i don't think i can make it any better

How the fuck do people find your social media?

All of your accounts are private and Kevin makes sure to never tag you on the rare occasion he posts a picture of the two of you together. The wives and girlfriends who have public accounts make sure to never post about you, and you’re careful not to comment on posts often. You’re a private person and though you understand that due to the nature of your relationship with Kevin you intrigue some fans, you don’t want to give them more than you have to.

Despite making no attempt to open up to the public or media, every day you wake up with hundreds of follow requests from complete strangers. At first it was a little exciting knowing that people were curious about your life but after years of the same routine it’s become draining. It takes you nearly twenty minutes each day to weed through them and accept only the people you know personally. Kevin doesn’t actually know how many people want to catch a glimpse of your daily life because you do your best to keep it from him. Knowing would only bring him stress, and you want him to be able to focus on winning games and loving you with his entire heart.

☼☼☼☼

The phone on your desk rings loudly, pulling your attention away from the computer screen that has way too many numbers on it for your liking. The finance department needed someone to proof their audit before sending it away and since you’re the only one in human relations that has a business degree the job landed on your shoulders. Eager to take a break, you pick it up and press the receiver against your ear.

“Hello?”

The voice on the other side laughs gently, but you immediately know it’s Kevin. “Hi sweetheart,” he says warmly, “How’s work?”

“Fine I guess. It’s work, Kev. Nothing terribly exciting happens here,” you explain but continue to fill him in on all the coffee pot gossip you got this morning. Kevin listens as you complain about forgetting your lunch on the counter and chuckles at how upset the situation makes you.

“What if I told you I’m outside your window with a burrito bowl?”

Excited at the possibility of seeing your boyfriend before dinnertime, you whip towards the window and spot Kevin on the sidewalk, waving like an idiot despite knowing your office is on the fifth floor. You hang up quickly after telling him you’ll be down in two minutes and let the receptionist know you’re stepping out for lunch. There’s a line for the elevator so you head to the stairwell, taking them two at a time in your haste. You’re crossing the street to the small park where Kevin has set up a picnic before your co-workers are even out the door.

You plop down on the blanket beside Kevin and lean into him. He presses a sweet kiss to your forehead before passing you the food he brought. You take a bite, sighing at the taste. Kevin knows you better than you know yourself and knew exactly what to get that would satisfy your mounting hunger.

“Thanks babe,” you smile, holding up your fork and offering him a bite. He takes it graciously but makes a face. “What’s the matter?” you laugh as you take the utensil back.

“I fucking hate avocado.”

The two of you eat in relative silence, speaking only when you remember a detail from your morning. Kevin tells you about the drills he’s going to lead at practice in the afternoon and what he plans on cooking for dinner since he’ll be home before you. You insist you can whip something up when you get home but Kevin shakes his head. He reminds you that relationships are give and take, and that you’ve made dinner the past three nights because he had a string of games. You manage to reach a compromise that has you doing the dishes before you have to return to work.

Kevin insists on walking you back to your office even though you protest vehemently. Your relationship is far from secret, and has been the topic of workplace gossip more times than you can count, but after five years you’ve learned to ignore most of it. However, you don’t want your co-workers to think you flaunt your NHL player boyfriend to prove you’re better than them. They all love Kevin, and a couple of them congratulate him on last night’s goal as he follows you down the hall. A few of the newer hires stare in awe and shake his hand, completely blown away that one of Philadelphia’s biggest stars is asking how they like their jobs.

“Pretty soon they’re going to approach you to do PR for us,” you chuckle as you flip the light on and close the door of your office.

His laughter echoes off the walls as a pair of strong arms find a home around your waist. “It would be kind of fun to hear myself crush those radio commercials.”

“Since when do you listen to the radio?”

“Checkmate,” Kevin sighs, pulling you closer. He kisses you quickly, not wanting to give a show to anyone who could be walking past, but it still sends you reeling. You don’t want him to pull away and kiss him again.

You get your way for a few more moments and then Kevin’s leaving with a promise to not burn the house down and wishes for a good rest of the day. Focussed on giving the audit its final once-over you don’t bother pulling your phone from the drawer you had placed it in when you got to work that morning. You turn up the small radio at the corner of your desk and get to work scanning the document for errors. There’s a mistake halfway through that skews the rest of the data and fixing it takes a bit of time, but it isn’t a huge deal. You have nothing else to do except answer a few emails and organize meetings for after the weekend.

An hour or so later you’ve completed all your tasks and debate what to do. It’s too early to leave for the day, so you decide to kill time by checking your phone. You’re expecting a few notifications, perhaps two or three memes in the group chat you share with your friends, but not the hundreds that greet you.

The majority of them are instagram notifications, and assuming they’re just more fans requesting a follow you ignore them, instead heading to your text messages. There’s a picture from Kevin of a dog he found walking home and another from your mom asking why you haven’t called home in a few weeks. However the one from Claude’s wife is the one that piques your curiosity.

Just a heads up that someone posted a pic of you and Kev to one of those stupid wag pages. I filed a request for Instagram to take it down but it’s gotten a lot of traction. Sorry :((

Your heartbeat increases rapidly and a million thoughts fly through your head at a rapid speed. Fingers shaking, you respond with a thanks and open up the dreaded app. You don’t see it immediately, your feed being full of photos belonging to friends and family, but it’s in your messages almost two hundred times. Many of them have text attached and you know there will be a comment about your relationship regardless of which one you open.

Tapping on the most recent message you brace yourself for the worst. The new window opens a photo someone took of you and Kevin while eating lunch in the park across from your office not even three hours prior. It’s grainy and the camera angle is strange, but you’re eating and Kevin is looking somewhere out of frame. The accompanying caption reads Kev and his girlfriend out for lunch today! Follow @philllywagupdates for more :).

You let out a sigh of relief – it could have been a lot worse. Personal pictures of yourself have made it onto pages like that before and most of them they’re paired with mean-spirited captions about your appearance or other trivial matters. Assuming you’re in the clear, you head back to the page of the original message to thank the person for bringing the post to your attention. However, the message accompanying the post is anything but positive.

He can’t even fucking look at you. It’s only a matter of time before he leaves you

The blood in your veins runs cold. You know it’s not true – Kevin’s made it clear you’re the one and truthfully you’re just waiting for a ring – but it doesn’t stop the sting you feel. What could possess someone to say such horrible things? You decide not to respond despite, possibly opening another can of worms with the seen function, and close the app. Leaning back in your office chair you focus on anything but your phone, looking out the window at passersby while regaining your breath. It works for a while, but eventually not knowing what others said eats away at you. You go through every single message to see hundreds of similar comments to the first, with only a few saying they’re glad you’re happy or how posting the picture is a violation of your privacy.

By the time you’re finished your spirit has been crushed. However, it’s also an acceptable time to start the weekend – at least no one in the office will have to see you cry. Things are hastily packed into your bag and you wave a few quick goodbyes before once again taking the stairs. You curse yourself for deciding to walk to work that morning and set off in the direction of home wiping away tears. The last thing you need right now is for someone to recognize you, but you have to get home. Tobias Jesso Jr plays at much too loud a volume through your headphones and Kevin will most certainly remind you it’s bad for your hearing, but the melancholy piano riffs of Goon overpower the thoughts swirling around your head.

Do people really feel that way about me?

Are my friends just too nice to stop inviting me places?

Does Kevin really feel trapped?

Hundreds of similar sentiments and situations cross your mind as you stumble through the streets of downtown Philadelphia, but you force them as far back as possible before opening the door to the apartment you share with Kevin. Hoping to slip inside undetected, you take your shoes off slowly and throw your jacket on the end table instead of hanging it in the closet. Your plan fails somehow and Kevin hears you, greeting you in a goofy apron covered in flour.

“Hey sweetheart,” he smiles, but it drops once your eyes meet and he sees the hurt on your face. “What’s the matter?”

“It’s nothing,” you insist, trying to step around him in pursuit of the bathroom.

Kevin doesn’t buy it and sees right through your feeble words. “It’s not nothing if you’re this upset. If you don’t want to talk now that’s fine, but I think you should get it off your chest.”

You know he’s right, but you also know you can’t tell him the true cause of your despair. “Just some work stuff,” you sigh. “The audit got all fucked up and I had to fix it even though it’s not my job.”

It’s not technically a lie, which makes you feel better, and Kevin buys it. He presses a sweet kiss to your lips in sympathy. “Go take a shower and the gnocchi should be ready by the time you’re done. We can spend the night cuddling on the couch.”

“And watching Selling Sunset?”

“We can watch whatever you want sweetheart,” he chuckles. You part from him with a final kiss and head to the bathroom. Hopefully the steam from the water will carry away the negativity brought on by that damn post.

☼☼☼☼

Time passes but the hateful comments on social media don’t stop. In fact, you’re pretty sure they get worse. It’s so bad that you’ve deleted every app except facebook because you need it for work. Kevin doesn’t notice your abstinence from social media, but he picks up on how you spend more time criticizing yourself or staring off into space. When he pushes you either brush him off or feed some bullshit excuse about how work is getting you down. You know he doesn’t believe you but trusts you enough to come to him when you’re ready to talk.

You aren’t sure if you’ll ever be able to tell Kevin what’s been going on. There’s been scrutiny from social media before, when you first started dating, but it quieted down after the initial media frenzy. He helped you through that but it’s different this time around. Never before have you had strangers tell you your life is worthless or that your boyfriend should end your relationship. Some of the other wags notice your absence on instagram but chalk it up to you just taking a break. They reach out via the group chat and send wishes to see you at the next home game. It’s nice to know they care, but the voice in your head that has grown much larger in recent weeks tells you they don’t truly mean it. This leads you to decline the invite as politely as possible, citing extended work hours for your absence. In reality you’re too anxious to be anywhere that isn’t home or work, petrified someone is going to post something that will add fuel to the flames of those who interrogate you.

It’s another Friday afternoon, and you’re leaving the office early once again. There’s a small craft exhibition taking place around the corner from work and today is the last day it’s open. You had been meaning to go all week, hoping to find something small to add to Kevin’s birthday gift. As you step out of the building there’s a small group of young women, who don’t look old enough to have graduated college, standing off to the side. It fills you with dread, worried that somehow someone found out where you work and the insults are going to start occurring verbally, but you force yourself to be rational. You work fairly close to one of the artsier districts in the city and it’s more than likely they just want to find a cute mural to take pictures in front of.

You pass by and swear you hear them snicker, but you remind yourself you’ve just been jumpy lately. When they peel from their place on the wall and follow behind at a distance you think the coincidences are running out. It seems a little too strange how their movements line up with yours, and you go down a few winding side streets in an attempt to lose them. Part of you feels ridiculous because what group of barely legal girls would track a full-blown adult around a city of nearly two million people, but your life is currently strange enough you can’t be sure. They don’t follow you, and by the time you reach the market your heart rate has returned to normal.

The first few stalls have little to catch your eye, but a few rows in you find a leatherworker who makes adorable wallets. Kevin’s is ridiculously old and falling apart at the seams – his mom bought it for him before the two of you got together. You think a new one will make a perfect addition to the concert tickets you already bought and browse the table for something simple and elegant. A deep brown one with tan braiding around the edges catches your eye and you know it’s the one for Kevin. Checking the price to make sure you have enough cash in your wallet, you approach the shop owner to purchase. The older man has a kind smile that reaches his eyes as he thanks you for purchasing from him.

“No, thank you for making something so beautiful!” you gush. “My boyfriend is going to love it.”

It’s then you hear it – snickering accompanied by the click of a camera. You look over your shoulder to see the same group of girls from before laughing as they huddle over a cell phone, no doubt already starting to broadcast the photo across the internet. Tears prick at the corners of your eyes but you refuse to let them fall. Those girls don’t deserve to see their mission accomplished, but the longer they laugh at you the harder it is to swallow your feelings.

Head held high, you thank the owner one more time before holding your head high and walking past the group. The only way out is past them so you hold your breath and pray they don’t notice you. Unfortunately you aren’t that lucky, and one of them looks up just as you come into earshot.

“If Kevin doesn’t leave you after that sorry excuse for a gift I don’t know what’s wrong with him,” she sneers.

Another one chimes in, “You’re honestly so pathetic.” They all cackle in amusement, and you speed up. The tears flow freely now, and you call an uber even though it will be a ridiculous amount of money. You just want to get home.

The uber driver doesn’t say anything when you get in, though you know it’s strange to be bawling your eyes out at four in the afternoon. You can��t help it – weeks of keeping all the hate to yourself finally got to you and being followed with the sole intent of ridicule is the final straw. At one red light he silently passes you a box of tissues, which you accept gratefully.

Luckily the lobby of your apartment complex is empty and you manage to get to your floor without encountering a familiar face. There’s a few hours until Kevin gets home from his final roadtrip of the season, and if you play your cards right you can get all the tears out and be as normal as possible before he comes through the door. You don’t even bother to put anything away, just head straight to the bathroom to slump against the tub. Sobs rack your body and you lose all sense of time. All you can feel is the hurt you’ve been holding in releasing itself and soaking the material of your blouse.

Kevin finds you laying in the position hours later. He tripped over your shoes coming in the door and immediately knew something was wrong – you always place them neatly on the rack in the closet upon arriving home. Peering through the quiet house for a hint at where you are, he sees the bathroom light on and makes a beeline for the room. It breaks his heart to see you like this, and even more so because he doesn’t know what spurred it on.

“Sweetheart, hey,” he coos, maneuvering his body to sit beside you and pull you into his lap. “What’s the matter?”

You bury your head in his shoulder and clutch the material of his dress shirt as you cry harder at the sound of his voice. Kevin takes your reaction in stride, rubbing circles on your back and working on evening out your breath. He doesn’t pressure you to speak and provides the stability you desperately crave as the world around you spins. An unknown amount of time passes before your tears run out, but spend it all on the bathroom floor curled into Kevin.

“I guess I should have told you sooner,” you mumble, “But I didn’t want to bother you.”

Concern laces Kevin’s features and his eyebrows knit together. “Tell me what?”

“I, uh, have been the subject of some internet hate for the past little bit,” you say sheepishly. It feels stupid to not have told him now, but you can’t change that. “But you were really busy with the season and I wanted to make sure your head was completely focused on the game so I just dealt with it myself. I deleted the apps and tried my best to go about my life. And then today after work I was followed by some people and they said some really hurtful stuff and shit became a little too real.”

“I’m so fucking sorry.”

It’s your turn to be confused. “Why are you sorry Kev? You're Not the one sending me death threats.”

He tucks a loose strand of hair back into your ponytail. “Maybe not, but I still made you feel like you couldn’t talk to me about what was going on. What kind of partner am I?”

“The best one,” you say confidently. “It’s okay, I’m okay. I just want to forget about it right now. Can we just disappear for a little bit?”

Kevin wraps his arms around you tighter, as if he can engulf you to protect from the cruel outside world. “We can do whatever you want. If you want to get out of the city for a bit if you want, or just spend the next few days here away from prying eyes.”

“I love you.”

You say it because you mean it, and if you could scream it from the rooftops you would. Kevin is incredibly easy to love, even when you make it difficult for him to love you back. You know another much longer conversation is coming about everything that has happened recently because communication is the only way to solve problems and Kevin deserves that, but you’re thankful he’s willing to put it to rest for a few more moments.

He cracks a smile for the first time since he’s been home and kisses the crown of your head. “I love you too sweetheart,” he whispers, “Always and forever.”

Things are far from over and though you still never want to show your face in public ever again, you know that Kevin is going to do whatever he can to make things better and that’s enough for you.

☼☼☼☼

taglist: @ricohenrique @tortito @boqvistsbabe @iwantahockeyhimbo @himbos-on-ice @2manytabsopen if you want to be added just shoot me an ask :)

#i don't love this but here it is!!!#one day i'll like the stories i write #kevin hayes imagine #kevin hayes x reader #kevin hayes fic #philadelphia flyers imagine #nhl imagine #nhl fic #hockey imagine #hockey fic #cwrites #sour

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