#another one for the resources post when i finally make it
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actually, i should just say this in its own post--if you're ever looking for a translation of anything ancient greek, ian johnston has a ton of translations that are both genuinely good and completely free to read. a lot of the time free translations are really old or just not that good but this man has translated, like, everything from homer to sophocles to kafka to nietzche and he's done it extremely well. i didn't think he had an antigone but i just looked and not only does he have one but it's genuinely very good. so i highly recommend his website as a resource!
#mod felix#resources#another one for the resources post when i finally make it#i have a draft saved but it's very half-baked
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Fucking hell Nightbringer really gave me everything huh god
Henry 1.0 origin story
Cerberus origin story
Satan's cat thing origin story
"Goldie in Freezer" origin story
Levi's Ruri-chan obsession origin story
Mammon being scared of ghosts/horror origin story
More in depth version of Solomon & Asmo's first meeting/pact origin story
A painful reason for why Asmo's room looks like that
What the tsl characters would have been like irl (the absolute worst wtf simeon)
Mammon's issues finally discussed in depth
Mammon being extremely ride or die for Lucifer
Almost instant Mammon & MC friendship
Mammon being just so amazed by MC and also insanely supportive of them
Mammon being willing to do anything for his brothers, being more sure of himself, almost instantly following Lucifer's orders and making the others do so as well
Levi's issues discussed in depth.
Levi straight up saying he was depressed and still is
Levi's friendship with MC!
Levi & Lucifer's relationship!!!!!
Levi being shy and scared and just so 😖
Things being bad in the Celestial Realm even before they left
Asmo's issues being discussed in depth
Asmo very explicitly having body dysmorphia
The brothers being much more supportive and loving of each other
Lucifer being visibly scared of losing another family member and being insanely overprotective because of it
The brothers being slowly overtaken by their sins (something that was always a part of them but also something they could control as angels) and losing control of themselves
The brothers gaining new magic
Satan being a fucking mess
Satan not really fitting in and all of them being really awkward around him
Satan's issues being discussed in depth
Belphie's issues being discussed in depth
Belphie expressing passive suicidal ideation
Belphie talking about how he needs someone to blame for what happened to Lilith so he can process it/make sense of it even if that someone is himself
Lucifer's issues being touched on from from different perspectives/angles
Diavolo's issues being hinted at
Simeon's issues being vaguely discussed
More about Lilith! (remember my post about how lilith definitely wasn't a sweet little angel because there's no way the universe would let lucifer catch a break? I was right!!! She was as much a little shit as the rest of her family!)
More about the demon king! (He wanted to stop the war too🥺 also a whole line of previous demon kings!)
More about god/how angels work (all angels are brothers & sisters but not technically family the way lucifer & his siblings are!)
ADAM!?!?!?!?!?
Solomon & MC's Sorcerer & Apprentice relationship seen in full detail!
MC being absolutely amazing
MC being competent and powerful and dangerous and resourceful and confident and the brothers realising all that but them also being funny and snarky and chaotic and outgoing and homesick and caring
References to present (s1-s4) brothers (& how they'll tear solomon apart if he doesn't bring MC back)
NIGHTBRINGER!? BARBATOS!!!??? but past barbatos doesn't seem to know anything about MC and present barbatos is helping solomon bring MC back....so who...?
References to Noble demons and conservative demons and devildom politics
Angel - Demon prejudice /racism from both sides explicitly shown
The brothers being war criminals and how the devildom sheltering them nearly re-started the war between the two realms
None of them being able to identify MC as a human (it takes Diavolo a long time + Lucifer straight up denies it when MC tells him), Adam & Nightbringer saying MC has the "power of angels", MC's favourite manga being one where the youngest child out of 7 is described as being angelic (*cough*lilith*cough*), Diavolo, even after knowing MC is a human, going "what are you"..... me softly chanting: nephilim!mc nephilim!mc nephilim!mc
The lessons flow better? It doesn't feel like one arc is squished into two lessons and then you must immediately jump into another different arc. It feels like it's all just happening in a connected sequence?
Better pacing in my opinion. It doesn't feel rushed.... like the part where satan discovers cats and then later is seen still sitting next to the cat and watching it? It feels appropriately spaced out
MC's relationships with everyone doesn't feel isolated. Like earlier there'd be a lesson or two dedicated to one character and we won't see much of the other characters during it. Now it feels like everyone is there interacting with everything in a normal, natural way. Yes there are lessons dedicated to getting to know one brother but the others are there, interacting with each other and MC during that time as well
The emotions & relationships are discussed/written in a way that feels very real and believable that it becomes actually really moving (s1-s4 also did this well but in nightbringer because of arcs/scenes/relationships not being isolated, of things flowing better and having a better pacing, of them outright discussing their issues it has a greater impact - yes I cried more than once shut up)
In the end, Nighbringer is darker than og OM! but not in the "grrr gonna kill you" way. It's "darker" because they address more serious topics in depth
#obey me spoilers#obey me nightbringer#obey me#obey me shall we date#obey me!#shall we date? obey me!#swd obey me#swd obey me!#shall we date obey me#obey me lucifer#obey me mammon#obey me levi#obey me leviathan#obey me satan#obey me asmo#obey me asmodeus#obey me beel#obey me beelzebub#obey me belphie#obey me belphegor#obey me main character#obey me mc#obey me solomon#obey me simeon#obey me diavolo#obey me barbatos#om! mammon#om! lucifer#om! levi#nightbringer spoilers
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Lets. D0. This.
(Please note: Post will be updated as I find more resources and think of more strategies)
(Please do not re-use gif without permission…unless it’s to save Rise…)
Mutant May
YOU can watch Season 1 and Season 2 of RISE right HERE!
So I’ve seen a a lot of people still wondering if Rise of the TMNT can be saved.
There’s is a lot of hope, especially with the boom of fans joining the fandom after the movie dropped last year, people making more art on tumblr, twitter, tik tok, and so on. But also a a lot of doubt, especially after JJ Conway’s post on twitter.
BUT…I still think there is a chance…a GOOD chance. WITH ORIGINAL CAST AND CREW! Why?
We live in the internet. Information is more then easy to get out now thanks to social media. There is all kinds of ways to get the word out to people. Let’s abuse it. 😎
Fans have brought back shows before.
We need a MAJOR push through social media, more fans, more art, it’s up to us…and I think we can do it!
Fans convinced Netflix to bring Sense8 back for a finale
Fans convinced fox to bring back “Futurama” after it was cancelled in 1999.
Hey Arnold got the jungle movie thirteen years after the show was cancelled
Animaniacs got a 3 season revival 22 years after it stopped airing.
Brooklyn 99 was cancelled in 2018, and the fans convinced NBC to pick up the series.
Arrested Development was canceled after 3 seasons, but AFTER it was cancelled, it grew an audience and they made it come back!
Fans saved the original Star Trek in the 60s with letters.
They did it. Why can’t we?
So what can we do?
Well…
1. PETITIONS TO SAVE RISE that we can all sign…
PETITION 1 (The strongest one, but the more petitions signed, the better!)
PETITION 2
PETITION 3
PETITION 4 (save the content that was cut/we missed)
PETITION 5! (Make an ROTTMNT season 3)
2. Pester Nickelodeon and Netflix on social media (THE BIG ONE Y’ALL, THIS IS THE MOST DIRECT AND IMPORTANT)
Be polite, be non-toxic (don’t be rude or mean, the boys would not want that, and the Nick/Netflix won’t listen), but be LOUD, PASSIONATE, AND ANNOYING! Ask for DVDs of the show/movie, and then BUY THOSE DVDs!
MAKE SURE TO ASK FOR THE FULL ORIGINAL CAST AND CREW TO COME BACK, INCLUDING ANDY SARIANO AND ANT WARD.
Sample DM/Letter (but try to come up with your own. Too many repeats and they will ignore it)
“Dear Nickelodeon/Netflix/Viacom, I can’t tell you how much Rise means to me, and I really love that you put the show on air. But it was not fair that the show was cancelled before it got the chance to reach the audience it deserved, only because of a few bad reviews and a lack of advertising. The show is great, there’s tons of fans, tons of art, and people, including me, want so much more! Please bring it back! We want the original crew to come, Flying Bark, for the show to get it’s full second season restored, and it’s five season run like it was originally intended. People hated the 2012 TMNT when it came out, but it got it’s chance and now there are people that love it. Why can’t Rise of the TMNT have the same? It’s clear that the creators love their work and there’s a growing fan base for it. Rise just came out at the wrong time, but it deserves it chance to shine.”
The more personal you made the letter, the more you say what Rise means to you, the better.
As for me? I’m sending them a picture of Pizza Pigeon with the #wewantmoreriseoftheTMNT and #saverottmnt
Request movies/seasons on Netflix.
Ask for Rise Season 2, another season, another movie. Just keep asking!
Nickelodeon’s facebook page (Look, I know that facebook is a relic at this point, but the more people go there and PESTER Nickelodeon, the better!)
Rise’s facebook page
Leave good reviews. Share. Leave TONS of comments
Nickelodeon’s instagram
Nickelodeon’s Twitter page (treat carefully, there be Musks out there…only use if you are over 18)
Nickelodeon’s TikTok
Niceklodeon’s letter inbox
Nickelodeon, 1515 Broadway, New York, NY 10036
Rugrats was brought back because fans bombarded Nickelodeon with letters saying they wanted it back. Might as well cover our bases. This one is a BIG DEAL!
Nickelodeon’s Corporate Number
1-212-846-2543 Call them! Annoy them! Ask how we can get their attention! Tell them why you love this show! Why it deserves to come back.
Contact Paramount
Paramounts Request form
Official Fan Page Rise’s Instagram
The more followers the better.
Netflix’s instagram
Netflix’s facebook
Netflix’s Twitter (Treat carefully. There be MUSKs out there…only use if you are over 18)
SPAM NICKELODEON’S EMAILS!
If anyone has any more, any deeper more direct points of contact, or more ideas, please share!
3. Leave good reviews for Rise anywhere and raise awareness everywhere you can!
One of the key reasons Rise did not do too well because it was unfairly review bombed before people could give it a chance…so get out there on tik tok, IMDB, Rotten Tomatoes, and ESPECIALLY youtube.
Make reviews! Analysis! JOKES! Support other content creators! When the Rise Reanimated video comes out, share it like no tomorrow!
No one paid attention when How to Train Your Dragon came out, but word of mouth and people saying it was good, made it the success it was. Let’s repeat history!
Anytime there is NEW RISE CONTENT on Nickelodeon’s YouTube channel, watch it, share, spread it.
Share this post on social media, across various sites, use the information here to spread awareness about how people can help and what they can do. Be relentless! (Like Leo in Lair Games)
Ask influencers to review, react, and give RISE a chance without placing judgement.
4. Make. ART!
Draw, Write, TWEET, Make MERCH, Sell MERCH, Make Tik Toks, Videos on YouTube, posts on instagram, discord, what pad, demanding more Rise, spreading the word, and just showing how much you love this show! Not only will it attract attention, but it’s also good for all of us. There will be more Rise content either way.
Make sure to @ nickelodeon on ALL of your art! SPAM THEM! ANNOY THEM! DROWN THEM IN LOVE FOR THIS SHOW! Demand DVD’s and Blue rays of the SHOW AND THE MOVIE! It’s not fair that we can’t have access to it!
PLAY THIS GAME!
If you see official Rise MERCH in the while, buy it if you can! Also support as many rise content creators as you can. If you can’t draw? Write! If you can’t create! Like! Share! Comment! Support each other!
Rise April ART Challenge
Keep in mind…there WILL be pushback.
Companies as big as Nickelodeon and Viacom care about their bottom line: $$$…money. BUT pushback, whether they are taking down your videos on Tik Tok, striking artists on twitter, mean that they’re taking NOTICE. So don’t. Give. UP!
One last thing to remember: DO NOT harass fans for enjoying other versions of TMNT
Even though Rise is the first and only TMNT I have ever loved, I don’t believe in shaming other fans for looking forward to, or enjoying other TMNT series. Gatekeeping like that was what stopped Rise from (heh) Rising as high as it should have. All Rise fans are welcome, and all TMNT fans are welcome. Rise deserves to reach more fans, it deserves another season, and it does not need to knock down other TMNT series to do it. Show them your love and your need for more Rise, without making other TMNT fans feel unwelcome.
Share, spread the word, give it your best shot! A village can move MOUNTAINS! SO let’s do it.
So that in the near future…we can MAKE THIS JOKE!
#rottmnt#save rottmnt#rise of the teenage mutant ninja turtles#tmnt#unpause rottmnt#rottmnt leo#save rise of the tmnt#rottmnt mikey#rottmnt donnie#rottmnt raph#netflix#instagram#nickelodeon#viacom#paramount#facebook#signal boost#social media campaign#petitions#turtles#underrated show#flying bark productions#manifesting
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Eight Strategies for Improving Dialogue in Your Writing
Well, hi! Oh my… wow! It’s been a long time since I’ve posted! I’ve been very busy and I am genuinely sorry to all my followers, but that doesn’t mean I’ve forgotten about this account, but here is one final post for the year!
Hopefully next year I become consistent with it again!
Let’s begin!
One of the best ways to help a reader connect with your writing is by crafting excellent dialogue. Use these tips to learn how to write dialogue that showcases character development, defines your characters’ voices, and hooks readers.
Why Use Dialogue?
Good dialogue performs all sorts of functions in fiction writing. It defines your characters’ voices, establishes their speech patterns, exposes the inner emotions, and showcases their character development. Beyond mere characterization, effective dialogue can also establish the setting and time period of your story and reveal information in a way that doesn’t feel overly expository.
Authors use lines of dialogue to reveal a character’s personality and express their point of view. For instance, an archetypal football coach might speak in short, terse sentences peppered with exclamation points and quotations from famous war generals. By contrast, a nebbish lover with a broken heart might drone on endlessly to his therapist or best friend, speaking in run-on sentences that circle around his true motivations. When an author can reveal character traits through dialogue, it cuts down on exposition and makes a story flow briskly.
Eight Writing Tips for Improving Dialogue
The first time you write dialogue, you may find it quite difficult to replicate the patterns of normal speech. This can be compounded by the concurrent challenges of finding your own voice and telling a great story overall. Even bestselling authors can get stuck on how a particular character says a particular line of dialogue. With practice and hard work, however, lackluster dialogue can be elevated to great dialogue.
Here are some strategies for improving the dialogue in your own work:
Mimic the voices of people in your own life. Perhaps you’ve created a physician character with the same vocal inflections as your mother. Perhaps your hero soldier talks just like your old volleyball coach. If you want to ensure that your dialogue sounds the way real people speak, there’s no better resource than the real life people in your everyday world.
Mix dialogue with narration. Long runs of dialogue can dislodge a reader from the action of a scene. As your characters talk, interpolate some descriptions of their physical postures or other activity taking place in the room. This mimics the real-world experience of listening to someone speaking while simultaneously taking in visual and olfactory stimuli.
Give your main character a secret. Sometimes a line of dialogue is most notable for what it withholds. Even if your audience doesn’t realize it, you can build dynamic three-dimensionality by having your character withhold a key bit of information from their speech. For instance, you may draft a scene in which a museum curator speaks to an artist about how she wants her work displayed—but what the curator isn’t saying out loud is that she’s in love with the artist. You can use that secret to embed layers of tension into the character’s spoken phrases.
Use a layperson character to clarify technical language. When you need dialogue to convey technical information in approachable terms, split the conversation between two people. Have one character be an expert and one character be uninformed. The expert character can speak at a technical level, and the uninformed one can stop them, asking questions for clarification. Your readers will appreciate it.
Use authentic shorthand. Does your character call a gun a “piece” or a “Glock”? Whatever it is, be authentic and consistent in how your characters speak. If they all sound the same, your dialogue needs another pass.
Look to great examples of dialogue for inspiration. If you're looking for a dialogue example in the realm of novels or short stories, consider reading the great books written by Mark Twain, Judy Blume, or Toni Morrison. Within the world of screenwriting, Aaron Sorkin is renowned for his use of dialogue.
Ensure that you’re punctuating your dialogue properly. Remember that question marks and exclamation points go inside quotation marks. Enclose dialogue in double quotation marks and use single quotation marks when a character quotes another character within their dialogue. Knowing how to punctuate dialogue properly can ensure that your reader stays immersed in the story.
Use dialogue tags that are evocative. Repeating the word “said” over and over can make for dull writing and miss out on opportunities for added expressiveness. Consider replacing the word “said” with a more descriptive verb.
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Write your book STEP BY STEP
hello hello, it's me again!
today i'm bringing you a step-by-step / checklist to finally get your book done. i know it can be a bit complicated to put everything together to make your idea come to life (you're definitely not alone!)
that's why i compiled some tips and made this post, in hopes to help some author out there :D
let's get started.
PREMISE
assuming you already have a good idea in mind, you should start by writing a premise. to help you with that, try to answer these questions:
who is the main character?
what are their goals?
which troubles will they face / what's stopping them from achieving their goals?
do they have an opponent? if so, who?
now that you know the answers to these questions, it's time to write the premise. the premise consists in a sentence that summarizes your whole idea.
PLOT OUTLINE
there are infinite ways to plot your story. you can do it by writing down ideas and linking them together, following a scheme, or any other method.
the most common plot outlines are these:
synopsis outline: one to two pages, where you hit all the major beats of the story
in-depth outline: outline each chapter/scene
snowflake method: develop the premise into a bigger paragraph, and that paragraph into a page (etc.) until you have the whole outline of your story
booken method: plot the start and end of the story, and the main characters
the novel factory created plot sheets for free, and you can choose from eight different templates. you might want to check it out!
KNOW YOUR CHARACTERS
having your outline defined, you should start developing your characters now. the main character's profile might be more detailed than the others, however, it's up to you. there are many character sheets out there on the internet that will help you create flawless characters.
i have a post with resources that might be helpful when creating a character, check it out!
and here you have some prompts and sheets to create a character:
Quick Character Creator - EA Deverell
Extremely detailed character sheet template - @hawkasss
The Best Character Template Ever - Dabble
Character Twenty Questions Worksheet - The Writers Circle
at this point, you should also define the narrator's voice, tone, etc, as well as the pace of your novel.
LOCATIONS
define the principal locations of your story, the settings, and where the story is taking place. it's important to know how the environment looks, and how your characters feel about it.
for this part, you might find it useful to do some research about some locations, if you're not familiar with them. find inspiration on Pinterest, Tumblr, or even on books, paintings, and art. everything is valid.
if your story takes place in a fantasy environment, you might need to fill out a template to create it or write down the way you imagine it to be. try to get as many details as possible, so there are no holes when developing the novel.
SUBPLOTS
you might want to give more depth to your novel by developing a subplot (or more than one). make sure it doesn't get too confusing or that doesn't take the focus away from the main action.
the subplot can be a romance, another character's relationship, a character's arc, a backstory, etc. this will make your story more real and 3D, more realistic.
develop it as a side story and mix it with the principal plot but don't make it as important as the main story, otherwise, none of the plots will make an impact.
SYNOPSIS
write a synopsis as long as you wish, covering every important part of the story. this will help you to really know your idea, and have a solid structure for it. it can range from 500 to 2,500 words, but you don't have to restrict yourself to a number.
things the synopsis should cover:
the status quo
the complication
initial challenges
midpoint
further challenges
the low point
the climax
the resolution
DRAFT
and we get to the best part which is writing! now that you know everything about your story, characters, locations, and scenes, all you have to do is to put all that together in words. don't feel pressured to make everything look perfect already, just write what comes to your mind. if you have a new idea for the plot, good, write it down! if this character doesn't make sense anymore, okay, get rid of them. just go with the flow, following the structure you've planned, and everything starts to come to life.
i know it's so tempting to go back, read what you wrote, and start editing and polishing, but trust me, don't do that! it's a waste of time, and you will take so much more time to finish your first draft. in fact, i've given up on so many stories because of that...
just when you finish the first draft, you will re-read everything and start editing, fixing plot holes, changing what doesn't fit well, etc. but for now, just write, get the first draft done. enjoy the process, don't rush.
thanks for reading!
i hope this post was helpful!
also, you might be interested in this free workbook with over 90 pages and many exercises! check it out here: THE WRITER'S WORKBOOK
resources for this post:
How to Choose a Plot Outline Method: 4 Techniques for Outlining Novels
How to Write a Novel: A Step-by-Step Guide
#write#writer#writeblr#writer tips#writers#writers block#writing#writerscommunity#writing advice#writing help#writing inspiration#writing prompts#writing reference#writing resources#writing tips#writers on tumblr#books and authors#author struggles#authors#writing community#resources for writers#free resources#research#tips for writers#masterpost#masterlist#list of resources#step by step#useful#save for later
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i found jay’s black jacket (an ID guide)
This black jacket is worn by Jay about 9 times throughout Marble Hornets, including his final appearance. And after some weeks of on-and-off research, I think I know the exact make and model.
This post will detail exactly how I found it, and serve as a guide for anyone that wants to find the jacket, whether that's for cosplay purposes, or if you're just keen on collecting items related to MH.
Main post under the cut
Intro
The first step to identifying the jacket was to gather as many references as possible.
I went back to the web series and took screenshots from any entries the jacket makes an appearance. (shoutout to mg549′s very comprehensive MH wardrobe guide, without it this would’ve been much more of a pain)
Jay's jacket is, for the most part, very plain. It's a solid color, full-zip jacket, without any particularly eye-catching logos or other details. I had to look for moments where even the slightest distinction appeared clear on camera, at least as distinct as it can be. Even if it was just close-ups to get the shape of a zipper, or how many buttons are on a sleeve, it was the best I got.
While I did manage to find a decent amount of these, there was just one crucial detail that would've made finding it near-impossible; the brand is never shown. Thankfully, I had another resource.
In 2018 Troy Sold a Lot of Stuff
In early 2018, Troy officially announced that MH would be continued in a comic series. To fund the first issue, he held a number of auctions for production items used during the web series on Ebay.
These included items such as Jay’s camera, Brian’s hoodie, A Masky mask, and Jay’s black jacket.
Lo and behold, the jacket listing includes a picture with the brand in clear view. It's from Gap.
Ebay does not archive sold listings older than 90 days. However, Worthpoint, a website for valuing and pricing collectibles, does. Using Worthpoint I was able to find all of these items, (and a lot more, which can be found in this doc I submitted to Archive Hornets)
Identification
With the picture from the listing and the series screencaps, I had a complete ID list.
(Top image is from the Ebay listing, with the contrast adjusted a little for easier viewing. The bottom two images are from Entry #79)
The Gap logo (This specific logo dates the jacket being made anywhere between 1986 and 2009, when it first appears).
Front Zipper (Note the shape)
The two front pockets
The two buttons and pointed cuffs on each sleeve (Second one is a little hard to see but it's jusstt peeping out at the side)
The blue piping in the inner lining
The zipper in the right side inner lining
The gray mesh inner lining
With these in mind, I could now go to the next and longest step-
Finding the Jacket
I combed three resell sites; Ebay, Depop, and Poshmark. My main goal wasn't to actually purchase the jacket, (although, I would like to at some point) but to find a jacket listing that had every identifier, and have a more definite baseline for finding others. I needed to be sure what I had was enough to properly ID the jacket. The references I had stitched together were decent enough, but I wanted to see if there was something better out there.
After tons of page scrolling and tab-switching and comparing and contrasting, I finally got lucky.
(first two images are from crashthecloset's listing on poshmark, last six are from shannfo-76 on ebay)
I haven't bought one myself as of posting, but I feel pretty confident this is it. The jackets were already sold, but every marker seemed to be accounted for. It also revealed new ones, like the reflective pattern and pockets on the inner lining, (zipper on the right side pocket, button on the left pocket) and the materials tag.
With that, here's some final notes that may be helpful if you try looking for the jacket yourself:
Online sellers often describe it as a light jacket, a windbreaker, a 2-in-1, or 3-in-1.
"Gap Mens Black Jacket" is the search phrase I used the most since it yielded a (very) broad result pool.
Most of the jackets I found came from Poshmark or Ebay.
The exact size of Jay’s jacket is unclear. My best guesses are either a US Men’s S or M, since Jay was pretty skinny and of average height. I’ve only been able to find maybe 2 jackets that are a size M, one of which is the first pic in the photoset above.
Gap has sold other black jackets that look remarkably similar to Jay’s, and they do pop up on resell sites. One of these was so similar, the only discernible difference was the style of the logo. I highly recommend making sure it matches the exact one Jay had before purchasing. (It's also more than fine to ask/msg me if you have any doubts!) As long as you know what to look for, you shouldn’t have a problem finding at least one.
One detail that confounded me was this sleeve poking out of Jay's jacket. At first I thought he was wearing a long sleeve underneath, making this shot a continuity error since he appeared to Only be wearing the green short sleeve under the jacket.
@hivemite pointed out that this might be a two-in-one jacket, which has multiple layers for different types of weather. While I have not been able to see the sleeve outside of two shots in entry #79 and #80, one listing I found did describe it as a 3-in-1.
that's about it! hope this helps :)
#marble hornets#jay merrick#ref#over and out#long post#happy entry 80 day. heres some extra tidbits just for the tags#at least two listings called this y2k which is really funny.#it is also strangely difficult to find these in sizes smaller than large#another thing kinda related. worthpoint is a shitty site unfortunately#as you can see with the jacket description. in which it apparently ‘‘works and comes with a charging cable’’#<- i mean that Couldve been an error on the original ebay listing#however that is. impossible to verify now unless someone somewhere had a screenshot#but each mh item from this particular auction there had consistently bad errors that inclines me to say that wasnt the case#ok this went too long for a few extra tidbits but can you tell i lost my mind
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handbinding of A Study in Scarlette by kittebasu
There are people who want to live forever, and then there is Shinichi, who just wants to live a little longer than this.
this bind has been in my head since i first read the fic like, three years ago. i dreamed up so many ideas for it, for so long, and now it's finally done! the typeset was actually done in early 2022, back when i was still using google docs, but it went through a few iterations because i was just. so. fiddly. with every aspect of this book. it needed to be perfect (as close to perfect as i, an amateur bookbinder out of my depth, can get) and it had to be absolutely over the top, to reflect the insane amount of love and care that the author put into the fic itself.
the first time i read this fic, i barely knew what detective conan was, much less all of the intricate plot details; i was just along for the ride, but by the end i was completely invested. i went back and watched through the anime as well as a few movies (it took me six months) and then read the fic again. and then a few more times. kaishin and the world of dcmk has utterly gripped me. it's 100% this fic's fault and i love it so, so, much.
i went through a few iterations of visual designs and i'm really happy with the little details i managed to squeeze in.
the entire color scheme is based around red, because 1) it's a murder mystery, 2) for scarlette shinamoto (and the title of the fic as well as the original holmes novel it references), and 3) the irony of "lady red" actually being red. the secret fourth reason is that i think red/gold is a super sexy color combo.
i sewed the textblock with red thread to reference holmes' "scarlet thread of murder".
another detail i love is the five yen coin bookmark, it was one of my first ideas and it turned out even better than i thought.
i wanted the endpapers to evoke a sense of the white marbled floor of the ballroom, with the glow-in-the-dark kaitou kid caricature being the luminol on the floor, and the little pops of red looks like blood that's been mixed in. i lucked out in that the other side of the endpaper was like a lavender-purpley color, i like to think of it as a little wink wink nudge to the color of the actual Lady Red.
the chapter pages got a few reworkings, but i'm happy with the illustrations i ended up doing for each of them. the chapter titles are one of my favorite things about the fic, each one has so much meaning packed into it and flows so beautifully, and i wanted to put as much care into making them pop as possible.
the cover was a linocut carving i designed and carved, which i then printed onto the bookcloth, and ironed on htv on top.
i also threw in a couple of my drawings of my favorite scenes.
this is getting way too long, so i'll end it here. i'll have a separate post detailing the process every step of the way, if anyone wants to take a closer look. this fic is kind of directly responsible for getting me into fanbinding, so it's safe to say it altered the course of my life. i now spend way too much time (and money) looking at book stuff.
kittebasu, if, somehow, you see this and would like an author copy, i would be honored to make one and ship it to you; i would be overjoyed to gift you with any art i have the ability to make, because the fics you wrote have irreversibly altered my brain chemistry, and being able to give back in any capacity would be a dream. (thank you.)
a few postscripts:
i am not selling any copies of this fic. partially because i believe in the gift economy of fandom as well as firmly keeping fanbinding a hobby that will stay unmonetized, but also because it took me months (years, if we are counting when i first finished the typeset) to finish this and i do not have the strength.
however, if you are also a fan of this fic and would like a copy, i honestly, fervently, encourage you to give fanbinding a try! renegade publishing and its discord server are an absolutely wonderful and free resource. i knew nothing about bookbinding and had zero materials when i first started, but i've learned so much thanks to the lovely people there. if you're still apprehensive about getting started, i'd be willing to share my typeset of this fic as well as answer any questions about the making of this book if you DM me.
#detective conan#detco#magic kaito#dcmk#名探偵コナン#my books#kaishin#kaitou kid#kaito kid#kuroba kaito#kudou shinichi#edogawa conan#handbinding#fanbinding#ficbinding#fanfic#bookbinding#a study in scarlette#book binding#guys#its finally done#im tearing up#this has been my dream bind for so long and its FINISHED#and im really really happy with how it turned out#i seriously cannot put into words how much this fic rewired my brain#ash knows though he's seen my 2 am red string theory corkboard#about what the sequel might be about#まじっく快斗#meitantei conan#case closed
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Aug 2023, bookbinding of The Silent Isle Imbowers by Tharkuun.
I’m sooo so so pleased to finally share this! I have been actively working on this for many months and waited until Tharkuun received her copy before posting so the final result would be a surprise.
-----------About this bookbinding under the cut
This binding has been one of the more elaborate pieces I have attempted so far. This has been my first binding where I (1) made three copies of a piece at once, (2) used a modified a historical illustration, (3) collaborated directly with another artist on the decorative elements, (4) finished matching art for the cover and title page, and (5) layered paint and heat-transfer vinyl for the covers. These are also (6) the first non-tiny books I have made with this style of hinge and cover attachment.
Pretty much immediately after I first read this story I felt I had to make myself a copy of this. I had a strong mental image of a vintage-looking cover for a fairy tale, with a deceptively simple design of flowers on the cover, probably with fancy metallic accents, the kind of thing you’d find in an interesting used bookstore with no summary, no text on the back, no dust jacket, just the flowers and maybe a title. I’m going to make a separate post about making this cover design a reality because oh man has it been a journey lol! I designed and drew the digital art for the cover (digital because of the cut and application method), as well as the corresponding title page illustration (pencil and dip pen, scanned, title added digitally).
When I asked Tharkuun about it she was excited to suggest I get in touch with quillingwords, who generously agreed to collaborate with me! Among her talents quilling writes calligraphy, and hand wrote both the book title and chapter headers for me to incorporate into my plans. Check OUT those chapter headers! So fancy! A font could never!! Quilling has also been very encouraging and let me yell about this project in dms for months so the final result could be a surprise for Tharkuun. Thank u so much quillingwords, your calligraphy adds invaluable amounts of swag to this project.
I was going to do some kinda neat font for the chapter headers, but quilling’s work is too cool for that and I decided to use a modified piece of a historical illustration instead. The illustration also happens to be cool as heck: I was browsing the Artstor database (an academic quality resource available for free via Jstor, my beloved) and found E. N. Neureuther's 1836 gorgeous etching for etching of the fairy tale Briar Rose, an illustration made for a printing of a Brothers Grimm recorded German fairy tale with Sleeping Beauty elements. Much to my delight this illustration not only matches the general look I wanted but is actually relevant to the story, itself a Sleeping Beauty spinoff.
Slightly less stylistically consistent are the endpapers, which are prints of two different paintings by Arnold Böcklin: Isle of the Dead (1883) in the front and Isle of Life (1888). The first painting had occurred to me as an excellent visual to go with the story, and Tharkuun and I discussed this and agreed that pairing it with the related later, more optimistic piece was too thematically appropriate to resist.
I had fun and learned a lot making these books and I am very pleased with the result!!
Materials: Archival bookboard, cardstock, cotton cheesecloth mull, archival PVA glue, linen thread coated in beeswax, paper cord, red cotton embroidery floss. Blue cotton backed with archival paper, acrylic paint, machine cut black and gold heat-transfer vinyl. Laser printed text and illustrations. Metallic scrapbooking paper.
#artists on tumblr#bookbinding#ficbinding#fanbinding#dreamling#my art#here there be fandom#the sandman#the silent isle imbowers#tharkuun#described#id in alt text#pls imagine me screaming continuously about this project for oh idk 4 or 5 months? oh I can make shiny books??#im not allowed to @ people in this post apparently#links and fic rec in reblog#laying on the floor I found a few missing words I must have deleted on accident while fixing formatting#poppies (Papaver somniferum) and mugwort (Artemisia vulgaris)#tailfeather binding
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hello! do you have any resources/guides for the sntry css builder? tysm and sorry if this is troublesome!
Well get ready! Doll is about to explain a lot of things! One of the most important things is html coding! It's almost a requirement if you want to do sntry builders! Especially tricky ones. You can find templates, sure! But what if the template has issues that you dont know how to fix? Then you're screwed! Click below for a full explanation of points that come to mind! (Disclaimer: Doll is not an html coder by any means! She's completely self taught!) Also resources at the bottom of this!
A few basics:
If you wanna import fonts into sntry, you need to link them with a download link. I've been people use catbox, filegarden, and much more to link it. The point is, you must have the ttf ready to download. Then you implement it into your html code like this:
This way, when you want to use it you type its name in the divider or item you want! Say, if i want it to be the overall font, i'd put it in p or body!
For scrollboxes, the most usual ones are the lace ones! Which look like this:
Usually you'll need to have the lace image and apply it with the border-image code! Most lace images will look like this image by the way! Also if you want it to scroll it's usually good to give it a set height, and then set overflow to auto. Sometimes it'll show the scroller horizontally too, but i fix that by writing overflow-x: hidden; (x for horizontal y for vertical).
Another thing is positioning , you have relative, absolute, fixed, and i forgot the last one! But heres a few notes from what I gathered!
Absolute: It will stay to one place and when you zoom out it'll stay in the exact place you left it at!
Relative: It'll be in relation to the position of the device! So 1080 x 1920 computer will position it differently than a smaller one! granted its usually relative hence the name.
Fixed: No matter if its zoomed out or in, it wont move form that exact position.
Resources
Scripted neocities!
This site has EVERYTHING you might need for codes! Fonts, backgrounds, cursors, text, everything!!! It's SOOOO useful 10/10 I highly advice u save it!
Pinterest:
Self explanatory but pinterest has a lot of people who post sentries for inspiration !!! It's so useful to have a hit of inspo for yourself! PLEASE REMEMBER the people who post are real and have boundaries! So if they ask you for credit, CREDIT THEM! I also have a pinterest, but right now I haven't posted anything except saving resources !!! Here's My board! (Follow doll please pspsps)
Carrds!
The reality is, a lot of the builder sentries you may see have been either made from scratch, or inspired by carrd creators. I suggest you google carrd pro tutorials to see the code the creators may use, and then customize it and make it your own!
Final thoughts!
Doll did not expect it to be so long !!!!!
Sentry builder is...
honestly pretty easy once you get the hang of it! Style codes, html, you can google a lot of the resources you may need which will give you a head start into what you may want!! Good luck out there!
#♡ ; talking#rentry#rentry inspo#rentry resources#rentry coding#sentry#sentry builder#sntry#sntry decor#sntry graphics#sntry resources#carrd stuff#carrd#coding#coding help#carrd pro
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People give Janeway guff about not giving Kazon replicators and transporters. Still, it's proven repeatedly that giving one Kazon faction an advantage over the other would be mixing it up in an internal war that would LITERALLY shift the balance of power.
Klingons at least know the technology they have engineers, even as it's becoming a dying breed over Warriors.
TLDR in Alliance Chakotay and Tuvok convinces Janeway that making an alliance with a Kazon faction is the way to go.
And so she does finally concede on this little experiment but with a lot of reservations going in: That once they leave the infighting will go on, and might actually have been worse.
Tuvok naively thinks it might help and bring about a Federation.
B'Elanna then pushes forward Harry's sarcastic comment about forming an alliance with Seska and then at the first sign of this, Chakotay balks.
And then Janeway says something that I feel is her guiding principle in dealing with hard decisions:
Janeway: "You can't have it both ways Commander. If you want to get in the mud with the Kazon you can't start complaining that you might get dirty."
Again, this is what I love about Janeway -- she gets flack for it but when Janeway makes a decision no one else wants to make it.
As I've mentioned in another post in tags:
#right or wrong#i admire how janeway is always the one#who goes#the buck stops with me#she makes the hard choices on voyager#especially during debates#when the staff just goes around and around in circles#like in memorial where she starts just in the background#listening to the senior staff debate#from how janeway started in episode 2 of season 1#where she's presented with the horrific#sophie's choice of neelix dying because he has no lungs#and then subjecting another person to the same fate#to the (now boring debate about tuvix)#to this moment#to the moment on the memorial episode#she will take on that burden#and she will always stare at the hardest choice unflinchingly#because someone has to#as the 12th doctor once said#sometimes all your choices are bad ones#but you still have to choose#
In this episode, she allowed herself to be persuaded but she's not sold on it. But she's letting her crew run with it -- okay so we do this, but if we do this, we commit to it. And yet, at the first uncomfortable decisions... there's already balking. This was Janeway testing the waters if any other person on her senior staff could carry water about making the hard choices.
So far the ones who have stepped up were B'Elanna, Tom, and Neelix.
Anyway, I wish there was more fallout on the whole Kazon vs Trabe conflict because that was actually interesting.
But also Voyager had a Doctor Who problem -- if they meddle in the affairs of a spatial politik, they don't know the repercussions of their actions and just look at Living Witness and the reputation Voyager gained simply by doing a bit of a trade deal.
Voyager can help when they can, see: helping Brenari refugees escape the Devore. (Counterpoint).
But they can't and shouldn't really interfere with internal politics. They're not like DS9 where they can stay in one place and fix things permanently. They're just passing through.
This is also why I think she wasn't really considering Tuvok and Chakotay's thing during the Void episode where they raid another ship's resources. (Also, because after Ransom and Equinox, she knows what faltering in the Federation principles can do).
Crucially, she's also known both Chakotay and Tuvok enough that while she loves them -- Janeway knows neither men have the stomach for their proposals.
The Alliance episode was one example of that already.
Janeway, though, if she is pushed to make that commitment and there was absolutely NO way they can prevent raiding others-- Janeway would have committed to that action 110%. This is why I feel Janeway would actually come to a similar conclusion as Sisko in In the Pale Moonlight.
Especially, if she gets daily reports of Starfleet casualties. I have a feeling, there would be less kicking and screaming when Garak finally does his reveal.
Janeway has rules for a reason. She is fastidious about it. For a reason. Because once she commits to an action, it will take both hell and high water to take her off that course.
/edited
#star trek voyager#kathryn janeway#voyager s2#(what is it about briefing room scenes in early seasons#why is it so inert? the only thing keeping the scene#interesting was kate mulgrew's force of personality)
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The Feral One • Ch 28
Finnick x Y/N
Series Masterlist Link
This may be the last chapter for a few days as we’re approaching the end of the story rapidly and I haven’t finished editing it yet lol. I apologize for leaving it off with a cliffhanger but I want to make sure the end is perfect before posting it. Life’s been busy this week so I haven’t had the time to finish it the way I want to.
Content Warnings - Injury, death, medical issues, I promise Finnick isn’t being stupid this time lol
The next week was full of recovery. You slowly regained your strength and were able to try solid foods again. The doctors polished all your scars off, including the one on your face from your games, at your request. You wanted nothing left to remind you of them.
You started physical therapy, as well as regular sessions with Dr. Aurelius. He allowed Finnick to join you, realizing you felt more comfortable with him nearby. You still had to use a walker to get around, but you were making progress.
A few weeks after the war ended, Coin called all the victors into a meeting. There were barely any left, mostly due to the war.
“I’ve called you all here for a very symbolic vote,” she states. You don’t like where this is going.
She proceeds to pitch her idea for a hunger games featuring capital children. There are mixed reactions from the remaining victors, with some believing the idea to be fair and others believing it to be cruel. Votes are cast around the room and it finally comes down to Katniss.
“I get to kill Snow,” she tells Coin, who agrees to this proposition.
“Then I vote yes,” she states. “For Prim.”
You can’t even process what this means. Another games? Was Coin out of her mind? You finally realized what you had been denying all along, as long as Coin was in charge, you would never be free.
Finnick brings you back to your shared room after the meeting. You allow his touch but still flinch away at everyone else. Dr. Aurelius had been working with you on that but it’s hard to undo the trauma of many years.
“I just want to go home,” you tell him.
“You have to stay here for a bit,” he explains. “District 4 doesn’t have the resources for your treatment. Once you are better I promise you can go back to 4.”
“What about you?” you ask him. “Are you staying?”
He hesitantly shakes his head.
“I have to go to 4 for a few weeks but I’ll come back as soon as I can,” he states. “Johanna will be here with you in the meantime and I’ll call every day.”
“You’re leaving?” you ask, dumbfounded by his response.
“I promise it’s for a good reason,” he says, squeezing your hand. “I wouldn’t be doing this if it wasn’t important.”
“When do you leave?” you ask.
“In two weeks,” he responds. “I’ll be here for the first bit of your treatment and return before it’s over. Then we will both go back to 4 together. Do you trust me?”
“Always”
That afternoon Finnick helps you walk out onto the avenue to stand next to the other victors. Snow was finally falling, and you were both alive to witness it.
Standing in front of all the capital people made you uneasy. What did they think of you? Were they going to hurt you?
You’re lost in your thoughts when suddenly the crowd erupts into chaos. You look up to see Coin lying dead on the podium, an arrow in her heart. A mob of people begins rushing towards Snow, eager to kill him.
Finnick quickly scoops you up and carries you away from the commotion. When he finally sets you down, you ask what happened.
“Katniss killed Coin,” he states. “Snow is dead.”
He has to take you back to your room before you have a breakdown. What evil creature was going to seize power of Panem next? All of this was too much.
You end up collapsing on the floor of your room, shaking uncontrollably.
Taglist:
@randomgurl2326 @mystargirl-interlude @uther-pendragon-is-an-ass @yourdailymemedelivery @americanprometheuss @l3xi3luv @noisyalmonddreamer @nordicvxid @teaganthemorningstar @samatokisunfinishedcigarette @justtrying2getby @lvsticm @notplutos @innercreationflower @nexxus13 @kachelleee @helluvafire @haymitchabernathyslover @memeorydotcom @frostsword @meri-soni-meri-tamanna @giverosespls @honethatty12 @just-levyy @dd122004dd @nekee-lilac02 @impeterporker @nox-the-gay-nerd @redsakura101 @hopefulatrocity @eddiemunson4ever @fangirlvibez @kittimbo @zucchinimalfoy @sleepy-roman @secretsicanthideanymore @writerofadream @finnysmusic @mayonesavegana @lilifl0wer @finnickodaddy @abbersreads @fox-bee926 @ginger-swag-rapunzel @isasalom @yizhoutv @livingdead-reilly @imaegonstargaryenswife0 @faephoria @omwtkydttfym @iris1587 @sarcasm-and-stiles @10ava01 @impossessedbyjeongyeon @littleanubis21 @scorpiolystoned
*if the tag didn’t work please check your settings to make sure other blogs can tag you
#hunger games#finnick odair#hunger games fic#the hunger games#finnick odair x reader#finnick x reader#finnick odair angst#finnick angst#finnick#thg finnick#mockingjay part 2#the feral one#avoxrising
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My Heart Is The Worst Kind Of Weapon
Ellie Williams x Fem!Reader
The joke's on you - we are salt and you are the wound.
Summary:
Ellie confronts your abuser, and after years of torment, you finally feel free.
Ellie Williams x Fem!Reader. Strangers to Lovers. Hurt and Comfort. Can be read with or without considering the canon events.
Word Count: 9,600
The Last of Us Masterlist | AO3 Link
THIS IS A RE-POST. This is a fic from my old blog (a blog that was shadowbanned, forcing me to move). This fic is not stolen, it is completely mine, and I am just re-posting it to help people find my new blog, and to make my masterlist complete when I post new fics for this fandom.
Detailed warnings and author’s notes below the cut.
Warnings: reader uses she/her pronounces, the reader is a lesbian/does not date men, themes of abuse and abusive relationships, domestic abuse, ‘love at first sight’ trope, could be considered ‘soulmates’ trope, hurt and comfort, the reader is being abused by a family member and is saved by Ellie,the reader is being emotionally and physically abused by a family member, evidence of emotional manipulation/brainwashing in the reader character, the reader character has injuries from physical abuse, trauma, becoming free from abuse, depictions of violence (fist fighting between Ellie and the abuser), mentions of guns and gun violence, there is elements of Joel and Ellie’s relationship in the background and this could be read with or without considering the canon events (their emotional falling out), mentions of alcohol, drugging someone against their will (done toward the abuser), threatening someone’s genitals with a knife (done toward the abuser), kidnapping and intimidation through violent threats (done toward the abuser), mentions of hanging/choking/suffocation, use of lesphobic slurs (I think ‘rug muncher’ is the only one?) (from the abuser towards Ellie), Joel and Ellie making a kidnapping (and potentially murder) plot together, this has a happy/hopeful ending.
A/N: Another re-post of a fic I really, really love. This one is particularly deeply personal to me. Whenever I write about the concept of abuse, it’s very emotional for me, but this one has some more personal touches - because it is about abuse coming from a family member and how it can be difficult to part from that because you rely on them for survival and resources that keep you alive. Often times when people think about abuse - or when abusive relationships are modelled in media, it is a romantic relationship, and they display how a person can go from sweet and romantic and turn into a monster, and how it manipulates the victims emotions and makes it difficult for them to leave. And I do think that is an important story to tell, but one equally important - the story of an abuser who is a constant in your life, and makes you dependent on them for survival, and it causes you to rationalise all of their poor actions and behaviour because you need them. You want them to be a good person in your mind because you don’t know how to sustain your life without them.
Another deeply personal touch on this fic - the title. It is titled after a Fall Out Boy song, and you guys might know - I fucking love Fall Out Boy. I feel like all of their songs have a direct cord to my soul. But this one in particular is so special and tender for me. I was struggling with what to title this fic, and I was going through a playlist of songs that I listen to frequently - and this one came up. Although I believe the original intent of this song is about a cheating spouse, for me, it brings up feelings of how I think of my abuser. Especially the lines ‘I’m the kind of kid that can’t let anything go, and you wouldn’t know a good thing if it came up and split your throat’ and 'this is me wishing you in to the worst situations’.
I feel like it is very accurate, because Ellie is someone who is very 'wearing her heart on her sleeve’ and through this fic, she wants to be emotionally detached and leave the situation alone, but she can’t. And it turns her heart into this weapon against her, and ultimately, against the abuser. Because it is only of the fact that she cares so much about y/n that she wants to hurt the guy at all. And it also works to describe y/n’s feelings, because she hates that she has emotional attachment to her abuser, but she does, and it makes her feel as though her heart is a weapon against herself. So yeah. I hope you enjoy this fic, and if you relate to it somehow, I hope you can heal.
...
Ellie didn’t believe in love at first sight.
She was the type of person who thought it was cheesy - some made-up bullshit built for movies and books to sell people on the type of story that would never actually happen. She founded herself on facts, and though she knew realistically it would never happen in her lifetime, she thought that space travel was far more factual than something like love at first sight.
Until she met you.
And yeah, it probably wasn’t love - at least not true love - until later on. But there had to be some reason that she stuck her neck out for you like that. There had to be something drawing her to you like that. Maybe it was that fabled invisible string. That unspoken thing that made her want to die and want to kill for you, especially within the first ten minutes of meeting you.
You were with a group taking refuge in Jackson. In such a small town, rumors were rampant. The group had been in town for less than a day and people were already whispering about whether or not Maria was going to take in such a large number of people on such short notice.
Personally, Ellie didn’t care. She knew that Jackson had the resources to support new people and she knew that Maria would make the right decision. She was a good leader; she would sense if the group were good enough people to stay or not. She wouldn’t knowingly let in any dangers.
But then, Ellie started to care very suddenly, very much - when she met you.
When she saw you, the very first thing she noticed was your smile. She didn’t think she had ever seen someone smile with such intense, genuine joy. It was something that instantly twisted her gut into knots - filled her with those cartoonish butterflies as she took in the sight of you.
You were standing along the edge of one of the fences, near a small, green pasture for the animals in town. It was a small wooden fence that came up to your hips, around an area that was sectioned off to keep the baby cows in so they could graze. You were leaning on the wooden panels, admiring those little cows with awe, a smile on your face a mile wide as you watched the animals stumble around happily in the field. It was a beautiful spring day, with a light breeze kissing against your skin, and plenty of bright green grass for the cows to snack on. It made the sun seem so much brighter with your smile under it.
Ellie couldn’t help but find herself drawn to you.
She was supposed to be on her way to return her rifle to the gun shed after patrol. But instead, her feet carried her to you, almost entirely against her will. And soon she found herself standing barely a foot away from you, leaning on that same fence with one hand and staring at you with a big idiotic smile of her own.
You gave a small jolt when you finally took your eyes off the cows and noticed her staring. Ellie panged with guilt. She hadn’t realized how unintentionally creepy she was being. She didn’t know that it was a programmed response on your part - an ingrained jumpiness that you couldn’t help.
She swallowed around the dryness in her throat, struggling for words, and she was thankful when you spoke first.
“You guys have everything here.” You said, bright and excited as you put your eyes back on the grazing pasture. “It’s the first time I’ve seen baby cows before.”
“We - uh - we also have sheep.” Ellie tripped over herself to say this, shouldering the strap of her rifle to point beyond to a spot where the sheep’s pasture could not be seen. “And there’s greenhouses, and horses. My horse is named Shimmer. You can come and meet her if you want!”
Ellie almost felt stupid, rushing to say all of this, rushing to impress you. If you liked Jackon’s plentiful resources, then perhaps if she pressed just how fantastic and resource filled the place was, you would want to stay.
She found herself wanting you to stay. Very badly.
You bit your lip, slightly shy, and let out a nervous giggle. You didn’t want to turn her down. But years of warnings in a closed off echo chamber had made you weary of strangers. Even seemingly kind ones.
“That would be nice.” You told her quietly. “Maybe later.”
Ellie thought she was coming on too strong. She kicked herself internally because of it.
She had no idea that you were hesitant to be friendly - hesitant to get too close because of the ‘consequences’ you had seen in the past. In your eyes, Ellie seemed like a lovely, friendly person, but you didn’t want to get hurt for trying to make friends. Even if you felt a spark of attraction towards her, you could never pursue it. You didn’t have the room to do so.
Ellie simply nodded at you, the pain of rejection curling in her gut as she began to walk off. But she stopped dead in her tracks when she heard it.
Yelling - a brute voice disrupting your peace.
When Ellie turned around, there was a man. Someone who would have been otherwise average in his looks, if not for the violence he wore so boldly, obviously uncaring of who saw him. His face was tight with anger as he crowded into your personal space, grabbing a hold of your wrist and screaming at you relentlessly as though you had greatly offended him.
She wondered how someone like you - someone so sweet, who took wonder in baby cows, could ever do something to warrant such a visceral reaction of anger from someone.
Ellie gripped her rifle tightly.
A voice in her mind told her that it was none of her business, but another quickly argued back and said that you didn’t deserve to be treated like this. It said that she should step in. She felt frozen as the two sides warred inside her. For a few moments, she simply watched on, taking in the one-sided conflict between you and this man with horror swimming inside of her.
Your reaction was the worst part.
Your face immediately shifted from that excitement, awe, and wonder that the baby cows gave you and contorted into pure pain. Tears welled up in your eyes and pure fear overtook your entire body. Your spine coiled up, as if to protect your internal organs, but you made no real moves to get away from this man.
He spouted at you about ‘wandering off’ and ‘what have I told you before’, ranting on and on as if you had made some horrible mistake by taking time out of your day to admire a grazing pasture full of animals. Ellie was just about to unlock her knees and charge over there to do something about it when a vial, angry eye caught hers over your shoulder.
“The fuck you lookin’ at?” He barked at Ellie.
Those simple words were all it took to trigger something in Ellie.
At a moment’s notice, all of her logic flew out the window, and she found herself consumed by the impulse of her rage instead. She shed off the strap of her rifle, leaving the heavy object on the ground behind her in case it might impede her as she barreled toward the man like a raging bull.
“Why don’t you tell me, asshole?!” Ellie fired back, entirely nonsensical.
But both of them, ill-tempered, were beyond talking at that point.
He stepped around you and went to open his mouth again and Ellie took a swing. She easily made contact with his jaw, but he absorbed it well. Her knuckles stung as she pulled back and landed another hit on his cheek, most definitely leaving a nasty bruise.
Ellie was caught off guard when a large fist collided with her face.
She would never be the type to say that men shouldn’t hit women simply on principle. Especially not in this case, because she had swung first.
She was shocked simply because of the sheer force behind the hit. It wasn’t just to get her off of him - it was vengeful.
Though her skull was rattled, when he moved his hand up again, Ellie caught his wrist and hit him again. Still feeling that blinding rage, she took him to the ground. His nose felt like mush under her knuckles and she wouldn’t have stopped - if not for someone forcefully pulling her off of him.
She wanted to yell when she found out that someone was Tommy. But he quickly dampened any of her protests.
Tommy then gave her a long lecture about ‘first impressions’ and handling her temper during ‘misunderstandings’. He told her that being a part of their family meant that even unintentionally, she represented Jackson as a whole. Regrettably, Ellie felt guilt curling in her stomach because of his words. Even if the guy had it coming, she hated Joel or Tommy looking down on her with disappointment.
And some time during that long, droning speech, you and that man slipped away. Ellie had a very bad feeling in her gut because of it.
She had a feeling that he was nothing but a cause of pain for you.
But of course, she had no outright proof of that. Aside from your tears. But you weren’t even there to tell Tommy your story. And what story was that? That you had been yelled at? How the hell did that substantiate Ellie beating a man up?
She had nothing more to go on than a gut feeling.
So rather than telling Tommy about any of the things she suspected, she accepted everything she had said, she apologized for losing her cool, and then (after he gave her a hug, patted her on the head and said ‘it’s okay, kiddo’) - she turned and walked away.
When she returned her rifle to the gunshed, Jesse asked if something had happened on patrol to cause the bruises on her face and make her expression so sickly, and she quickly shrugged him off.
Ellie felt intensely guilty for not doing something more. She felt bad for not simply asking you what was wrong, for not handling the situation like a real human being. She had no clue why she couldn’t simply be calm when she saw you so upset like that.
She didn’t even really know you. She just had a feeling that you were too good to be treated like that. Something deep in her gut was screaming that you did nothing to deserve it.
The group you came in with split up. Some of them made their way down to the coast with the intention of fishing, perhaps finding and fixing up an old boat, and some of them stayed.
Ellie took notice when you and the man who had yelled at you stayed.
She also took notice of the fact that whenever she saw you around town, that man was never very far from you. And whenever he lingered around you, you were much different from the girl she had met that day near the pasture. You were slumped down, never rising to your full posture, constantly tense, and incredibly quiet. You never spoke a single word to anyone other than that awful man. You never even made eye contact with other people.
Ellie spent weeks watching you from afar, attempting to see if you were okay, looking for some ‘evidence’ that you weren’t. Some hard proof that she could bring to Tommy and Maria, something to show that she wasn’t insane for attacking that man. And it wasn’t until the spring rolled into summer, and Ellie’s bruises from the incident had faded, that she found time to speak to you again.
There was a time when Ellie caught you without your ugly shadow - when you were by the coops, feeding the chickens, imitating their clucking and laughing to yourself.
“I think you’ve got a career as a chicken caller.” Ellie chuckled as she walked toward you.
You smiled when you looked up and saw her.
“Maybe.” You shrugged. “I just like them because if they say mean things to me, I don’t have to know.”
Ellie felt a lump rise up in her throat at the pain behind your words.
It left an awkward, painful silence for a moment before you spoke up again.
“Look, I’m sorry about before.” You told her. “If you thought you had to defend me, or…” You continued staring at the grainy feed on the ground, pointedly not looking at Ellie. “I piss him off. Often. He was just having a bad day, and I-”
“That’s no excuse for him to yell at you like that.” Ellie cut you off. She rushed to get the words out, desperate for you to know this at the truth. “He’s got a temper, doesn’t he?”
“So do you.” You chuckled. It wasn’t genuine laughter.
There was a twinge of fear in your voice. It made her nauseous. She never wanted you to fear her the same way that you clearly feared that horrible man.
“I’m sorry.” Ellie said quietly, intense guilt overtaking her. “I do genuinely apologize if I scared you. I just… I couldn’t stand to see you crying like that.”
“I totally get it.” You snorted, painful humor lingering in your voice. “It’s so annoying. But… sometimes I can’t help it.” Though you kept your voice steady, these simple words spoke volumes of pain.
Ellie wanted to ask why. She wanted to ask if there were more days when he pushed you to tears.
“I’m sorry that I’m such a crybaby.” You told her. You tried to laugh this off, as though it was just a funny trait of your personality, and not a fault of pain being inflicted onto you.
Ellie shook her head vigorously.
“No.” She quickly corrected you. “That’s not what I meant.”
Confusion knitted over your features. Ellie fought hard to find the words to explain it.
“I was angry because he made you cry.” She explained. “I was pissed off because he upset you, and - and, I know it’s stupid. I don’t even know you. But you don’t deserve that.”
Hearing those words for the first time was a truth so radical it almost tore the ground from underneath your feet. After years of being told that you weren’t worth the trouble - that the food you consumed was a burden, that the bullets used to protect you were a waste - being told for the first time that you didn’t deserve such treatment… you felt like the words didn’t belong in your ears.
“What?” You looked at her with pure shock overtaking your expression, a most genuine and raw reaction. “You really care that much about me being upset?”
This gripped Ellie’s insides worse than anything else. You could barely conceptualize someone caring about your feelings this genuinely.
“Yeah.” She admitted quietly. “I do care.”
This left your face tight with contemplation, intense thought. Ellie didn’t want to leave room for you to get too caught up in it, for you to overanalyze her genuine gesture. So she came up with something else.
“So… did you still wanna meet my horse? Maybe we could take her out for a ride?” Ellie posed.
You seemed hesitant. But eventually, you decided ‘fuck it’ - you might as well have some fun. Especially if it meant spending some time with someone who actually seemed to care about you.
Ellie took you to the stables and introduced you to Shimmer, and officially introduced you to herself, as you did in return - which seemed odd after all that had happened. But it was nice to finally have a name to go with your pretty face. It was nice to finally hear your laughter as Ellie made an age old joke about hay and horses.
After you took a while to pet the horse and get acquainted with her, Ellie got permission to go past the gate. She took you on a slow trot on the outskirts of Jackson. She had butterflies curling in her stomach the whole time as you gripped her waist, sitting on the back of the horse, and you smiled brightly and complemented how peaceful everything was.
When the two of you got back from the ride, you kissed Ellie on the cheek, and she nearly squealed with happiness.
And then, she didn’t see you for nearly a week afterwards.
She thought she had done something wrong, but she had a sneaking suspicion that it had nothing to do with her and everything to do with that awful man who barely let you out of his sight.
The next time she did see you, you were walking along closely behind that wicked man, your eyes low to the ground. And when she called out your name, you didn’t look up to greet her.
The sweet summer turned into fall and Ellie felt the guilt gnawing at her more, especially when she noticed the days or even weeks when you didn’t seem to come outside. Days when you didn’t show up to do your chores and were supposedly sick, days when nobody else seemed to care why you were missing.
There was that voice in her head. ‘She’s just a girl.’ The voice said. ‘It’s just a crush. It’s none of your business. You should just move on.’
Ellie couldn’t bring herself to listen to that voice. For some reason, she felt this thing gnawing deep in her gut - something that said you needed her.
Against her better judgment, Ellie went to the house she knew you were staying at, and knocked on the door.
She wasn’t surprised when you answered. You peeked through the door with only half your face showing, utterly terrified.
“What are you doing here?” You barked.
Ellie had a feeling that your anger was a formation of fear, and it wasn’t entirely directed at her.
“I was worried about you.” Ellie admitted shyly.
You opened the door further, hesitantly, and then pulled Ellie inside before you shut the door and closed all the locks. Ellie felt her stomach twist when she noticed you looking through the curtains, as though you were afraid for your life, looking out for danger.
Ellie had a distinct feeling that she knew what that danger was.
A giant lump formed in Ellie’s throat when you turned around and she saw it - that black eye, swollen and bruised, glaring at her. It was the part of your face you had been blocking with the other half of the door. There were other things she couldn’t see. Scrapes and bruises and hand shapes swats over your arms and torso, covered by your purposefully baggy sweatshirt with long sleeves.
“Just stop.” You said, turning to Ellie, your voice quaking with the intensity of your emotions. “Stop worrying about me.”
Ellie’s jaw tensed. She would find that intensely difficult - practically impossible.
“No.” She easily told you so. “I care about y-”
“Stop.” You said, a harsh cry in your throat.
It was too painful for you to consider. The idea that someone sweeter and nicer existed in the world and cared for you. The idea that the way of life you had known for years wasn’t the only way to survive.
“Look, I like you.” You added on. “You’re really sweet. But you don’t want me. I’m sure you can find someone else-”
Ellie stepped forward, her fingers brushing so gently over your cheek, right underneath the swelling of that awful black eye. You were so entirely startled by the pure gentleness of the touch that you let out a choked off sound from the back of your throat, almost a sob.
“He did this to you?” Ellie asked, her voice deadly calm and quiet.
You refused to answer.
“Is he your fucking boyfriend?” She prodded, her voice even sharper and more offended now.
You scoffed, pulling away from her touch. You thought she was jealous of the idea of you having a romantic partner. But in fact, she was deeply offended at the universe, she was in turmoil at the idea that someone would even consider hurting you when they claimed to love you.
“My brother.” You told her, the word almost sounding like poison on your tongue. “I would never choose someone like him. But I’ve been stuck with him for as long as I can remember.”
“Oh.” Ellie said quietly.
It was not a possibility she had considered. But she knew that there had never been any romantic connotations to the interactions between the two of you. Only danger, intimidation, and pain.
It was almost a worse fate, in a sense. The idea that you had been saddled with him because of genetics, that you couldn’t escape him because of obligation, or being forced to survive together.
“Yeah, oh.” You repeated, tears clutching the inside of your throat. “And really, it’s none of your business. He’s always taken care of me. He takes care of me, so-”
“This is not taking care of you.” Ellie argued sharply, gesturing to the mark on your face. “If you need someone to take care of you, I’m right here.”
You rolled your eyes at this. Again, you thought it was jealousy. That it was her trying to make herself seem appealing as a romantic partner.
You didn’t know that she was serious, that she would give you the world on a silver platter if given the chance.
“And I sure as hell won’t hit you.” Ellie added on.
“That’s easy for you to say.” You scoffed.
“That’s easy for me to do.” She fired back. “Not beating the people you love is the bare fucking minimum. In case no one ever told you that.”
Her last words were intensely sharp, but struck a chord deep inside of you. It caused your stomach to churn with harsh realization, something you probably already knew that was brought to the surface and waved in your face:
This was not a life that everyone lived.
“I can’t do this right now.” You huffed quietly, shaking your head.
You were still swimming deep in denial, hating the idea that your life was founded entirely on pain. But Ellie would fight through all of that pain to get to you.
“Come on, how long is it gonna be before he kills you?” She asked, the words quiet but devastatingly striking.
You remained painfully silent.
“What kind of life is this for you?” She spoke up when you did not reply. “There’s so much more out there for you that doesn’t involve your asshole brother.”
“Look, you know nothing about him.” You said sharply. “You don’t know what kind of life he’s had. You don’t know what he’s been through. What we’ve been through. Some of the things he’s saved me from.”
Ellie could only imagine what was going through your mind. Obviously, she had seen some of the darker things the world was capable of. She knew that if your brother had saved you from some of those horrors, it made him look like a saint by comparison.
She wanted to scream that you didn’t have to go through this. Life didn’t have to be like this. Absorbing his hits and being a target for his anger wasn’t necessary for your survival.
“Usually it’s my fault anyway.” You sighed. “I meant what I said before. I have some weird talent for pissing him off.”
Ellie was downright insulted at this.
“It is not your fault.” She rushed to say, her throat straining with the intense passion behind the words.
You found it difficult to believe her.
Any reply you could have mustered was drowned out by the sound of heavy boots coming up the porch.
“Get out.” You barked at Ellie, panicked. “Get out, you have to leave.”
You shoved Ellie out the back door before she could argue, and the sound of more screaming and an ugly collision of a hand on flesh made Ellie clench her fists to avoid charging back inside. She had to tell herself one simple thing - she wouldn’t be able to explain a murder to Maria or Tommy.
She wouldn’t have to.
And there was maybe only one other person in town who would understand.
She went right from your place to Joel’s, and he seemed too pleased about her being there in order for him to really question it. He seemed even more pleased when she asked for his help.
When Ellie explained the situation, she was surprised that Joel didn’t want to take it to Maria. But they both knew that she was diplomatic. She had an entire town to think of. She couldn’t be chasing down people’s personal problems, and she couldn’t be known for doling out vigilante justice. She had to make people in Jackson feel safe, and she didn’t think that civilian trials and public executions would be the way to do that. And as far as Ellie knew, nobody in Jackson had ever acted up like this before. Maybe they were just good at keeping it a secret. (That thought scared her more than anything.)
Joel suggested something about a quiet smothering and a shovel. Nobody would ever find the guy’s body, he reasoned.
Ellie didn’t want it that way. Even if the guy was a piece of shit, he was your only family. She knew that in some fucked up way, you would miss him.
No - it needed to be his choice. And he wasn’t going to make the right choice on his own. So they had to guide him to it. Well, they had to force him to it and shove his face in the damn right choice.
And then, if he didn’t make the right choice - then they would go to Joel’s version, a Plan B, and they would get the shovel.
Her and Joel talked it over for hours, making a solid Plan A. When they were both finally satisfied, Ellie left out the back door to head to her place to finally crash for the night - when had it gotten dark out?
She paused in her tracks when she saw you standing at the bottom of the few stairs that led up to the porch.
You had a large sweatshirt hood pulled up over your head, and in the minimal light from the back door’s bulb, Ellie could see that your eyes were entirely startled. Your cheek was sporting a fresh, wicked bruise that hadn’t been there before. Your lip was busted, and you had the neck of the sweater pulled up, half hiding some marks on your neck.
Clearly your brother had come home furious about something. Perhaps he had seen Ellie leaving. She partially felt guilty about it, and definitely felt more secure in her plan.
“I - uh - I ran into Dina, and she said I could find you here.” You said, motioning off to where you must have spoken to Dina, muttering nervously because Ellie had been standing there for a few moments staring you down with sadness in her eyes and had not spoken. “I was gonna knock. But… I…”
‘I got nervous.’ The words were lost on your tongue. You knew it sounded strange. Being afraid to knock. Being afraid to ask for help.
Ellie walked down the steps to meet you on the ground, and you didn’t move away when she reached up and brushed a gentle thumb across your lip - not quite touching the area when it had been split open, but clearly scorning it in her mind.
She wanted to suggest something about running away, but she knew Joel would just come after her. The easier solution would simply be to get rid of the awful man who had done this to you.
You grabbed her wrist and leaned into her hand. She cupped your cheek then, holding you so tenderly that it almost hurt. Your body was so unfamiliar with sweetness, with comfort.
“I can’t do this.” You sobbed quietly. “Ellie, I can’t do this.”
You weren’t feeling brave enough to leave the familiar, the thing that bound you in pain and torment.
“Yes, you can.” Ellie told you firmly.
She gently tilted your head up, forcing your gaze toward hers.
“Ask me.” She told you.
You both knew what it meant.
‘Ask me for my help.’
‘Ask me to get rid of that monster, and I will.’
You let it bubble inside of you. The words swelled up inside of your throat, and a wicked sob escaped, causing hot tears to leak down and touch Ellie’s hand before you got it out.
“Help me.” You croaked. “Please.”
“I will.” Ellie told you firmly. “I’ll get rid of him.”
She leaned in then and planted a kiss on your forehead, something sweet enough to render another sob from your throat. When she moved to pull away, you reached around and grabbed the back of her shirt, clutching on tight to keep her there, pulling her into a hug and holding her to savor the precious temporary moment you were able to be away from your tormentor.
“Ellie?” You said her name, and she hummed a response, still leaning with her lips gently pressed against your forehead. “I know - I know it’s so stupid. But… I don’t want him dead.” You told her. Ellie had predicted as much. “I just… I want him gone.”
“It’s not stupid.” Ellie assured you. “I understand.”
By the time Ellie got everything together, the cold was just setting in.
The first snowfall had just hit Jackson, and she had made sure to keep a close eye on you in the interim. You told her over and over again that you were going to be fine.
A few times you even went back on your ask, you told her that you and your brother were getting along much better. Ellie’s gut churned on the days when you smiled and told her that things between you and your brother were getting much better, that he was making an effort to control his temper, that you could see him making ‘big changes’.
On for another fresh wound to show up on you and when she would ask you about it, you broke down crying and declared that it was all your stupid fault.
Ellie knew that he was never going to change. And it only made her more firm in her convictions to carry through with the plan that she and Joel had carefully laid out.
Gathering the supplies needed for her plan wasn’t as hard as she originally thought.
The pharmacy in Jackson was surprisingly easy to steal from. She found a pharmaceutical journal in the library; finding out which drugs could knock out a grown man and memorizing the names of them - not that hard.
And then Ellie took an easy fall during one of her patrols, wincing and whining about the pain in her twisted wrist far more than she felt it, getting the nurse to unlock the drug cabinet to give her some tylenol with codeine. Then she ‘accidentally’ knocked over a tray with a bunch of stray pieces on it, and she got what she needed out of the unlocked cupboard like clockwork.
She wasn’t sure if the people in Jackson were naive, or if she was far too used to being a criminal.
Her wrist had healed up nicely by the time everything else was ready.
Joel thought it would be wisest that they use his basement.
He explained to Ellie that they could use an old military technique - shut out all the light, take away anything potentially familiar about the room, make it naked and bare and anonymous so that it would seem like a random place that could be anywhere.
It would be right in town, but the prospect of seeming so far off, so ‘in the middle of nowhere’ - it would be a good part of the scare tactic. They spent some time cleaning out the basement, putting garbage bags over the windows, and draping the room in plastic tarping - partially to scare him, and partially, just in case.
Joel got a bottle of cheap whiskey that he watered down some, and Ellie poured out the bottle of pills onto the counter with the intention to crush them all up and mix them with the alcohol.
“Christ Ellie, that’s enough to take down a goddamn horse.” Joel commented.
Clearly, it was too many pills.
Ellie took a handful of them - half, and put them back in the original bottle. When she looked up at Joel again, he shook his head. Still too many?
“Here, let me.” He said, gently shouldering her out of the way so he could make the mixture himself.
“You act like you’ve done this before.” She commented.
“You act surprised that I’ve done this before.” He replied.
He did have a point. Especially considering that when Joel had met Ellie, he had likely been expecting her to be a large bag of drugs, and not a child who needed to be smuggled.
Joel put back a much bigger portion of the pills, only leaving four tablets that he began to crush up to be mixed in with the drink.
“The alcohol is gonna magnify the effects of this stuff. A lot.” Joel explained, emphasizing the last words. “You kept saying you didn’t wanna kill him. So you don’t need to give him an overdose.”
Ellie nodded. It was a good point. She felt lucky to have his help with this.
Joel scraped the crushed up tablets - now a powder - into the bottle, and put his thumb over the opening to seal it while he shook it up, making sure it was well dissolved before he put the cap back on.
“Remember. Pour one for yourself, but don’t fucking drink from it.” Joel reminded her.
It was a mental tactic. Pour two glasses, so as to not seem suspicious, but don’t take a sip.
Joel handed her the bottle, and they walked over to your place.
Ellie made sure that Dina was keeping you busy with spare chores, things she supposedly couldn’t do without your help, ensuring that you would be out of the house for the night and wouldn’t miss your brother gone. Ellie went around to the front door and Joel went to the back, waiting for her signal.
She knocked on the front door and when your brother answered, she waved the bottle. She apologized for the two of them having gotten off ‘on the wrong foot’ when he first came into town. She claimed that she wanted to set things right with him.
He looked her up and down with suspicion, but opened the door. He fetched a couple of glasses and Ellie did as Joel instructed - poured one for herself after she poured one for him, took it in her hand, but didn’t sip from it.
He eagerly knocked the first drink back and Ellie hated the fact that he didn’t pass out right away. He poured himself a second and she forced herself to make an attempt at conversation.
She asked about one of the pictures he had on the mantle over the fireplace - a framed photo of him and some woman. He grunted, saying that it was ‘his bitch’ but ‘she was dead now’. The way he spoke about women made Ellie want to hurl. This caused the conversation to lull into him asking if Ellie had a boyfriend.
She shrugged it off. Especially seeing as he didn’t seem like the most accepting type if she told him why she didn’t have one. Then he looked her up and down as though he was inspecting her. As though just because she didn’t have a man in her life, that made her an available prospect for him. Ellie clutched her glass so hard she thought it cracked.
He took more gulps of his drink, and then he mentioned you. He said that he had seen Ellie talking to you.
He wasn’t clever about his intentions. He wanted to know why someone who was clearly friendly toward his sister wanted to be on his good side all of a sudden.
Before she could make up some lie, the drugs kicked in. He became hazy, and made a slurred thought about his liquor tolerance being higher normally before he dropped to the floor, out cold.
Ellie knocked on the back door for Joel, and they had his unconscious body halfway down the basement stairs when Tommy’s voice came into the house, shouting for Joel. They both gave each other that ‘oh shit’ look and Joel dropped the man’s head like a sack of potatoes. He rushed up the stairs to talk to Tommy before his brother could come to them.
Ellie dragged the dead weight the rest of the way, and she listened as the voices carried through the house. Joel was getting called out for an emergency patrol route - a large horde of Infected had been spotted near the west watch tower.
Tommy asked for Ellie too, but Joel lied and said that he hadn’t seen her.
As Joel was gathering his things to leave, he went to the top of the basement stairs. He gave Ellie one last firm, knowing look. It was an out. She knew that if she wanted to, he would stay back and help her clean up the mess, and they would find some other way to go about things so she wouldn’t have to go it alone.
But she was firm in her convictions.
“I’ve got this.” She told him, giving him a nod.
He nodded back and then closed the basement door.
She picked a steady beam in the ceiling.
She dangled off it with her body weight to make sure it wouldn’t budge (even though your asshole brother was probably a good hundred pounds heavier than her). And then she put him in the noose Joel had tied, with the rope tied precariously around the beam.
She had more than enough slack on it to make sure that he wouldn’t choke while still unconscious from the drugs. As tempting as it was to simply kill the man who had been abusing you for years, this was about scaring him. This was a warning. An attempt to get him to make the right choice. His hands were tied behind his back, making him unable to get away.
As he came around to consciousness, he began to groan and squirm, and Ellie wasted no time in putting her plan into action.
She went to where she had the other end of the rope tied, fashioned to some hook that might have been used to hang up tools or something else at one point, and she untied it and hoisted him up. He choked furiously as his breath was cut off by the noose, and Ellie made sure he was far enough off the ground before she grabbed something else important - the stool.
When preparing, Joel had intentionally cut off two of the legs, making it wobbling and unsteady. She put it underneath him and guided his legs to it, and then he took a wheezing breath as the pressure was released from his neck while his feet wobbled on it unsteadily.
“What the fuck?” He barked out, obviously trying to sound intimidating when he was so breathless. “What the hell is wrong with you?! You’re fucking insane!”
Ellie took a step back, looking up at him with a neutral expression. He was entirely powerless. He couldn’t swing and hit her, he couldn’t run. If he jumped, he would hang himself. He was completely at her mercy, and he had to listen to what she had to say.
In regards to the question, she shrugged.
“Maybe.” She said simply. “I just wanna talk.”
“Oh, you wanna talk?!” He growled out the words in anger, still trying to sound lager and more powerful than he was.
And then, all too predictably, he swung out his leg in an attempt to kick her.
Ellie easily dodged it, and the motion made him unsteady on the stool. Both his legs fell off, and she simply watched as he struggled, hanging freely by the noose for a few moments. He sputtered and choked, kicking around frantically to get his feet back on the stool. It was a wonder that he didn’t knock it over.
Eventually, he did get back up to stand on it before he passed out. He continued to choke on the air, veins bulging in his face from the effort. All while Ellie stood back, arms crossed, staring at him condescendingly.
“That was stupid.” She commented quietly.
“Fuck you!” He choked out.
“Look, the way I see it, you have two choices. Maybe three.” Ellie explained.
He glared at her with absolute poison in his eyes, but remained silent and still, other than the tremors in his legs as he struggled to balance on the stool.
“Option one: you continue being a petty bitch, so I leave you here.” She told him simply. “You can test your endurance for a few hours, maybe even a few days. But no one will find you, if they come looking at all. And eventually, your legs will give out from exhaustion and you’ll hang.”
“Y/N will come for me.” He replied confidently. The devilish smirk that spread across his face gave Ellie the urge to smack him.
“No.” Ellie argued, just as quick, just as confident. “You really think Y/N is gonna be able to find you?”
This was the mind game Joel had talked about. He was right in Jackson, right under your nose. Would he shout for help, or would he believe that he was out in the middle of nowhere, stranded somewhere that you would never be able to find him?
His silence was all too telling. Ellie resisted the urge to smile, knowing how important a firm, intimidating face was in this situation.
“Option two,” She continued on, taking his silence as a sure sign that he didn’t like option one. “You can listen to what I have to say, and you can get agreeable about it real fast.”
“What’s option three?” He asked.
Of course, he didn’t like option two either. He didn’t like being agreeable.
But Ellie had a feeling that in a few minutes, option two would be the one that he’d beg for.
“You say something I don’t like,” She got her switchblade out of her back pocket, and clicked the switch to show off the sharp, shiny blade. “And then I kill you.”
There was a pointed moment of silence as he looked between the sharp point of her knife and her unforgiving, deadly calm expression. For a moment, his enraged face wavered, and then came fear. It was just a flicker, but Ellie saw it as weakness. And she was going to exploit it.
“What the fuck do you want?” He barked.
“It’s very simple.” Ellie explained. “Leave Y/N the fuck alone. Get your shit, leave town, and get as far away from her as possible.”
“That’s my sister.” He argued. “That’s my blood. You can’t just expect me to abandon the only family I have, I-”
“If you respected her as your family, you wouldn’t fucking beat her.” Ellie cut him off, the words turning to poison on her tongue.
He looked intensely caught in that moment, his expression becoming ghostly. As if he somehow hadn’t figured out that this whole thing was about his abusive ways.
“What? You don’t like me ‘cause I protect her? ‘Cause I look out for her?” He immediately switched, swelling into that self righteous, taunting person he was with you. “You wanna fuck her, don’t you? You fucking self righteous rug muncher, think you know what’s better for my own sister than I do! What the hell is wrong with you? You-”
As he ranted, Ellie stepped forward and hesitantly grabbed the waistband of his pants. Clearly, the message wasn’t getting through to him.
And though it was something more disgusting to her than blood, guts, viscera, even the smell of an old moldy building - Ellie yanked down his pants in one swift movement, trying to ignore the sight of it in front of her. She placed her switchblade right at the spot where his dick met his inner thigh, simply resting it there.
The feeling of the cold metal in such a sensitive spot easily shut him up. His stomach clenched as he held his breath, likely waiting for Ellie to cut him.
With him on the stool, it was hovering at around eye level, and she tried her hardest not to look directly at it. For you, it was worth it. That’s what she told herself.
“Listen carefully,” Ellie told him, her voice still low, still deadly calm. “You are going to agree to my terms, or they’re going to find your body missing this.” She threatened him, gently nudging the blade upwards, not yet cutting into flesh.
He gasped, shock and horror crashing through his system. He continued to struggle with balancing on the stool, struggling not to lean into the knife by accident and maim himself by mistake.
He looked at Ellie with terror in his eyes, but oddly enough, he didn’t say anything. Ellie considered it progress.
“I’m going to be very generous,” She said lowly, making it sound like a threat. “You have twenty four hours to get your shit, and get the hell out of Jackson. I don’t give a fuck what you tell Y/N. In fact, you don’t have to tell her anything at all. Just disappear. I don’t care where you go. Just get the fuck away from here. The farther, the better.”
Ellie paused, letting her words hang in the air for a moment.
“If you’re still in town by sundown tomorrow, I will kill you.” She said. “If you tell Y/N about this little incident, I will kill you. If I see Y/N later and she has a single scratch on her-”
“You’ll kill me.” He quickly finished off the sentence as he thought she would say it.
Ellie shook her head, putting on a wicked grin of her own for the first time during the conversation.
“No.” She said, a chuckle peeking through her voice. “I’ll make it slow. I’ll make you beg for death. I’ll make you wish that you had taken this very fucking generous first offer.”
There was another silence, filled only by the wobbling legs of the stool rocking against the ground, and the man’s anxious breaths.
Ellie wondered if he was stupid enough to decline her generosity.
“Okay.” He finally agreed.
Ellie hoped that she wouldn’t have to follow through on her threats, but she wouldn’t hesitate to.
She took her knife away from his crotch, leaving a small nick on his inner thigh that would hopefully serve as a good enough reminder of what he was supposed to do.
Of course, the temptation to hurt him more brutally was there. She knew that if Joel came home and she was covered in blood - he would help her clean up. He would help her hide the body. But Ellie knew that this was about something bigger than herself, her own rage, her own guilt.
It was about keeping your conscience clean.
She knew that if you ever found out that she had killed your brother, no matter the reason, no matter the situation - the guilt would fall back onto you. You would spend the rest of your days wondering how you could have done things differently to solve a problem that was never your fault. So she would take the burden of guilt or fault off of you, and force it onto him - where it belonged. He would get to live, but he would never go near you. Not ever again.
After thinking about all of this for a moment, and calming herself, Ellie unceremoniously cut him down, letting him fall into the middle of the floor with a grunt. She pulled his pants back up and shoved a bag over his head. The bag something else that Joel had woven into the plan - another scare tactic.
She kept his arms bound behind him as she struggled to lug him all the way across town without getting caught. He struggled against her hold and spoke up every now and then, demanding to be released, but Ellie simply kicked him and told him to shut up. It worked well. It seemed that he was truly afraid of her, because he was much more docile now than the man who had risked hanging himself to kick her in the head.
She dumped him on the back porch of your house and cut the ties on his wrist. He could feel stupid later for the fact that he had been in town the whole time, not secluded off in the woods someplace you would never find him. He yanked the bag off his head and looked up at Ellie with pure scorn in his eyes, and she held up her knife once more, reminding him just how sharp it was as she left him with some parting words.
“Sundown. Tomorrow.” She told him firmly. “Or Y/N won’t even find the pieces of you scattered out in those woods.”
Ellie was surprised when he didn’t say a single word, didn’t even hurl any insults at her back as she walked away.
She had no idea that he was happy to cut his losses, thinking that you weren’t worth the trouble if Ellie was willing to kidnap, threaten, and eventually kill for you.
Ellie went to bed early and hoped that everything had worked.
She woke up from a deep, hazy sleep to pounding on her door.
She struggled to get out of bed, thinking there was some kind of emergency. She flicked on a light and opened the door, and you came rushing inside.
Ellie almost didn’t see you through her sleep dulled eyes, her lids still half-closed, but she recognized your voice as she closed the door behind you.
“My brother is gone.” You said, your voice edging between worry and fear. Ellie thought you might be relieved. She didn’t know that you were still tentative - scared that he might come back, terrified it was a trick. “It’s just - he just packed up all his things, and when I woke up, he was gone. And he left me this note.”
You thrust a piece of paper into Ellie’s hands, and she blinked her sticky eyes open a few times in order to read it. She scanned over the messy writing, barely absorbing it. It was some bullshit about how Jackson ‘wasn’t right for him’ and he felt ‘suffocated’ and he was going to travel to catch up with your group who had gone to the coast, he thought he was a man of the sea, blah blah - but you needed to stay in Jackson, because it would be safer for you.
“It’s a trick.” You announced as Ellie read over the words. Your voice quaked, your throat tight with fear. When Ellie looked up, tears were dancing in your eyes. There were sharp scratches on your neck - they were scabbing over, and a greenish bruise on your cheek that was fading. “It’s gotta be a trick. He’s testing me. He wants me to - to follow him? Or he’s coming back, or-”
Ellie tossed the paper aside, uncaring of where it landed, and then stepped toward you, grasping your face with gentle hands.
“It’s okay.” She said calmly. “He’s gone.”
She echoed the words you had said that night, letting you know that she had miraculously granted your request.
If it was true, then you would consider her a guardian angel. But you almost couldn’t bring yourself to believe it.
“You did something.” You said quietly. It wasn’t accusing. It was a simple truth. You swallowed thickly. You waited before you asked your next question. “Is he dead?”
You would have hated to think that Ellie would go through so much trouble to frame his murder as him simply leaving town.
“Would you hate me if he was?” She replied.
Strangely enough, you had no clue how to feel.
Ellie saw the warring on your face, the years of pain tethering in your soul, and hoped to release you from it.
“He’s alive.” She sighed, a heavy awful truth floating from her lips. You looked somewhat relieved, but then that fear pricked into your big, sad eyes once again. “He’s not coming back. I can promise you that.”
If he did, Ellie would kill him. But she didn’t speak those words to you.
You lunged forward then, tightening your hands around her back, squeezing her with intense, passionate ferocity as you pressed your face into her shoulder and began to sob. Ellie held you dutifully, trying her hardest to be gentle with you, petting smoothly over your back as her heart ached at the sound of your cries. She had no idea that it was relief - pure relief exhaling from your lungs, the feeling of finally being able to breathe with the presence of that dark tormentor no longer hanging over your life.
“Thank you.” You sobbed, clutching onto her shirt. “Thank you, Ellie. Thank you.”
…
When Joel came back from his patrol, he asked where Ellie had buried the body. She sighed and told him that the guy had made the wise decision to leave town. Completely of his own accord. He shrugged and said he didn’t care either way - he just wanted to meet the ‘lovely young woman who was worth going through all the trouble for’.
Ellie invited you over for steaks at Joel’s house a few days later, and artfully dodged all the questions about whether you were dating or not.
…
A few months later, when winter thawed out and spring had come around once again, Ellie had taken you beyond the walls of Jackson once again, both of you delighting in the purity of everything nature had to offer, and your newfound freedom.
“Is it just me or is the air out here… fresher?” You posed, inhaling deeply as you threw your head back, truly basking in the nature around you.
Ellie giggled at this, and you threw a smile back over your shoulder at her. You walked along the path, bobbing between the trees and enjoying the greenery as it thawed out from the snow.
“It’s the mountains, there’s nothing but fresh air up here.” Ellie chuckled. “As far as I’m concerned, it beats living in the city. That place stunk to high hell. People piled on top of each other, old rotting buildings, no trees anywhere.”
You let out a small laugh at this. It wasn’t Ellie’s greatest work in comedy, but your lungs felt much lighter these days, and she soaked up the sound like the new saplings soaking up the sun.
She had also noticed your choice of attire for the day. For her, there was still that small nip in the air, something indicating that there might be one last frost left to the year, something that made her want to wear a sweater. But you had worn a short sleeved tee shirt with your jeans, and Ellie preened at the fact that there was not a single bruise anywhere on your skin. Some old scars that she could never have the hopes of reversing, but more and more lately, your smile outshined all of them.
“Ooh, look at this!” Ellie came to crouch at a small patch of grass, what you didn’t recognize as thick reeds that were somewhat special to her.
“What is it?” You asked.
“Joel taught me this.” She noted, making you even more intrigued.
Ellie plucked one out of the dirt, and held it between her two palms before she held it up to her two lips and blew - it made a sharp noise like a duck’s call, and you instantly began giggling at this delightfully strange sound.
“Okay, how did you do that?” You asked, kneeling down beside her.
Ellie grabbed up another one and put it in your hands, positioning them well. After a nod from her, you put it to your lips and gave a hard breath. You dissolved into laughter once again when it made that strange sound.
“I love that.” Ellie commented, absolutely beaming herself.
“What? You play the guitar but your favorite instrument is grass?” You joked.
“No.” She replied. “I love that smile.” She told you, motioning up toward your face. “That’s why I fell in love with you.”
“Els.” You murmured quietly, unable to truly explain the wave of emotion that came over you - being intensely thankful for her saving you, changing the course of your life, the swelling of love you felt for her and how it only grew with time.
Ellie didn’t need words. She leaned in and kissed you then, and you - for the first time in a long time - relaxed into her love and let yourself be happy.
From time to time, you were tempted to ask what exactly it was that she had done to make your brother go away. But as the months ticked on and your relationship developed - as Ellie helped you navigate your freedom and enjoy the sweeter things in life, you found that you truly didn’t care.
...
A/N: This is a standalone oneshot, so please do not ask about a sequel or a continuation for it, because there won't be one. If you liked it and you want to comment on it, please comment on the body of work that I have written. Or feel free to check out the many other works I have written on my TLOU Masterlist. Thank you!!
#sundrop writes#ellie williams x you#ellie williams x reader#ellie the last of us#ellie williams#ellie tlou#ellie x reader#ellie x fem reader#the last of us
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Eyeless Jack x angel!reader
Prize request 1/5 for @blackflask ! I hope you enjoy!!
Notes: Reader is GN! More of a "reader and jack meet and slowly grow closer" rather than "heres how they romance" post! I've never watched trolls but the dynamic in my head for reader and Jack here reminds me of poppy and branch
CW: None
Well it all started when you LOUDLY and quite ungracefully smashed through the poor mans roof and slammed into the ground
To save yourself from the embarrassment, you try to scramble out through the front door only to find it had already been locked for the night; you... were caught, quickly..
For one reason or another you're not immediately snuffed out due to trespassing onto his property; maybe it was because your wings were sprawled out on display, clearly showing that you weren't.. well, human
I like to imagine it's because he already has to deal with the fact he needs to take other human lives to survive, taking yours when he gets no sustenance or resource out of it just feels... worse
Jacks original plan was to patch you up and then have you leave immediately. The only real reason you werent instantly kicked out was due to your injuries, you couldnt really.. go anywhere
Jack is quiet, so hes not going to speak much when hes bandaging you- a problem if you happen to be a chatty person, you'll only really be met with short responses
He doesnt answer any questions you ask about him, he doesn't even give you his name on that first night
His original plan doesnt end up working, though, because you keep coming right back with things. Food, gifts, things like that. When he keeps rejecting them you turn to just.. following him around when he leaves his cabin, you insist that you want to pay him back
He tells you that you don't need to
And you dont take that as a cue to leave
Initially he wants his peace back but over time he starts to get used to your company
You guys start talking when he goes out to make sure the traps he set around are still.. functional and to see if they've caught something yet
You eventually learn his name, and he learns yours. You mostly talk about yourself, and your past and where you came from
It would take a while longer for Jack to tell you about himself, but he does open up to general conversation before that!
Hs finds you sitting on his porch waiting for him and he finally invites you inside.. now that you're not running off of pain and adrenaline you can see how run down the cabin was on the inside
You offer to help fix things, and he doesn't stop you after you keep insisting
And you add your personal touch, and unofficially you move in with him.. and suddenly things aren't so bad for either of you!
He doesnt even realize it when he starts seeking you out first, just to be around you.. its.. sweet
#creepypasta x reader#creepypasta x you#creepypasta imagine#eyeless jack imagine#eyeless jack x reader#eyeless jack headcanon#eyeless jack x you
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I need to say something to you all that may come harshly, but I say it out of love.
A lot of you would be living your dream lives already or have even succeeded at the I AM state months ago if you had just logged off of Tumblr and abandoned all other loa resources.
I really really hate, loathe and despise the obsession with “the void”. Nobody hates it more than me. I’m its number one hater.
You guys have over complicated something that wasn’t complicated in the first place.
These are Neville's instructions about how to do it:
You say silently but feelingly, "I AM." Do not condition this awareness but continue declaring quietly, "I AM — I AM." Simply feel that you are faceless and formless and continue doing so until you feel yourself floating.
Mind you, people haven’t even experienced the floating feeling or any other symptoms and still succeeded. You guys take mental note of what worked for another anon and hope that this will finally be it and that’s the problem You read success story after success story and send follow up questions about how long it took them to “get in”, which affirmations they used, what position they laid in, which exact meditation they listened to, what the temperature of the room was and whatever other irrelevant matters. You go from blog to blog in search of validation, wondering if you did it right by laying facedown rather than in a starfish position, if the affirmation you used is okay and if swallowing was the reason why you failed. That’s why you’ve continued to struggle, you keep entertaining the idea that you’re doing it wrong because you’re not doing it exactly like someone else and that has been the downfall for a lot of you. What should have been the takeaway? Different things work for different people, but what if I reminded told you that you are… God? As in, THE GOD, who gets to decide (assume) and so shall be? The God who can assume that snapping their fingers will instantly turn them into pure consciousness. Yet here you all are, folding like H&M sweaters accepting this (“failure”) to be your state of consciousness and hoping that this new exact procedure will finally help you succeed when all it has ever taken was to… assume otherwise.
The reason you’ve failed is because you’re conscious of that. How many times should I remind you all that consciousness is the only reality? That all it takes to finally see and experience the change is for you to shift your state of consciousness?
In order to rise to the level that you are not now expressing, you must completely drop the consciousness with which you are now identified. Until your present consciousness is dropped you will not be able to rise to another level.
Here is a list of all of the new additions that have been introduced/overcomplicated it:
Having to relax
Clearing your mind
Laying down
Staying still
Not swallowing (...?!?!)
Doing it before going to bed/at night
Using any kinds of waves (alpha/epsilon/theta)/subliminals
Affirming anything aside from I AM [I am pure consciousness/faceless and formless/the void/nothing]
Doing 3 day-3 week challenges……
inducing sleep paralysis
void concept………………
Affirm mindlessly throughout the day that it’s easy to do
I know people who’ve succeeded despite moving, while in class, while standing up in the shower yet day in and day out I continue to see people beg for the specifics. If any of these procedures worked for you and you manifested your dream life, congratulations! but none of these deviations are necessary. All they do is cultivate new assumptions within you guys that in order to become pure consciousness you need to clear your mind, stay completely still, take deep breaths, lay in x position, count to x, affirm «…» countlessly, etc.
I would also like to add, there is no need for void oriented blogs or extensive informational posts regarding this subject. You guys are only making it worse on yourselves. Blogs that are committed to answer void questions and reblog void success stories do more harm than good because they further condone the fascination with it and harvest more assumptions about how to do it.
Not only that, you guys obsess over methods and challenges wayyyyyyyy too much and your attention is specifically consumed by them when your focus should be targeted towards having it in the 4D. When you are fixated by the need for it to be present in the 3D as soon as possible, you are missing the point of the law of assumption.
It is not about wanting nor getting, it is about embodying and accepting that it is already yours now. Claim it in imagination and it’ll inevitably crystallize within your tangible reality. As within, so without.
There is no shame in wanting to try it out, there is shame in the pedestalization of it. The I AM state is not the answer to all of your problems. I understand the need for instant results, I know people who were dealing with difficult circumstances and wanted an immediate remedy so the I AM state became the goal when it shouldn’t be the goal, it’s only the means to get you to the goal, but obsessing over whether you’re doing it correctly isn’t going to help you, it’ll only impose stress and frustration upon you and will further push you in a hole of desperation and the cycle will perpetuate.
It only worsens when people literally put their lives on hold. You could have manifested your dream life within a week by entertaining a completely new state of consciousness (though gentle reminder that time shouldn’t be a point of focus in general either but I digress), but your attention is entirely consumed by the I AM state and you’re participating in three day challenges “waiting” until your mind is completely marinated in affirmations about how quick and easy it is… why? Stop waiting for your desires, they are yours NOW.
The reason why methods and challenges work in the first place is because you have given them permission to be the conditions that will be required in order to bring your desire in the 3D. If you assumed clapping three times would add $500,000 to your bank account that’s precisely what would happen and all that is asked of you is to shift your state of consciousness. Methods and challenges do not grant your desires, they are only training wheels that’ll aid you to live in the end and feel the wish fulfilled, which is meant to be the goal.
To see that you guys go to me and other blogs BEGGING us to manifest that you wake up in the void tells me that you guys truly don’t see yourselves as the architects of your reality.
Please adjust your self concept and stop surrendering to other people, it’s absolutely shameful. You are GOD, please start acting (and thinking) as such. Stop seeing yourself as a failure and start seeing yourself as the person who’s in control of every facet of their reality. because you are. The 3D is malleable at your command. That is what the law states. Please STAND UP.
You want to succeed at the I AM state? Okay, apply the basis of the law. How would you feel if you knew that becoming pure consciousness was as easy as breathing? That all it took was for you to relax and dwell on I AM? How easy it is for you to do whenever you feel like it? Sustain that state and you will not fail.
I genuinely pity and condemn the damage the fixation on the I AM state has caused in the community as a whole as well as on you guys individually. This is helping no one and I am tired of seeing the chokehold it has put a lot of you in. if you feel called out by this post then I strongly encourage you to reconsider what you plan to do from this point on. Leave « the void » alone, learn about the law and apply. Please, please, please give « the void » a rest. Not for my sake, but for yours. The pen (your imagination) is always in your hand and it's simply waiting to be used. You are all infinitely greater than you think you are. Stop putting your lives on hold and neglecting the inalienable power within you over the I AM state.
You have my love and you have my support. I wish each and every one of you nothing less than all of your desires materialized. I am here for you to help you however I can when it comes to clarification regarding the law of assumption, but I'm never going to partake in this fascination with the I AM state and further exacerbate it.
That is all.
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This is such an insanely good scene To Me and we genuinely do not talk about it as often as we should even though it makes me so autistic... So I'm just gonna analyze it, looking mainly at Ras' manipulation tactics.
First, you have Ras, pissed off in an alley, angrily complaining about his woes, when suddenly Beatrix approaches him with an offer. (This scene will later be paralleled in the finale, but Jordana takes the initial role of Ras, and Ras takes the role of both Beatrix and himself, the Approacherrr and the Manipulatorrr.)
Ras stops, because he hears Beatrix's footsteps before her shadow appears on-screen, and based on the lighting the shadows appear to be pretty long, this scene occurs either early in the morning or late in the afternoon. We're gonna go with early in the morning, as a reverse parallel to Jordana's scene, which is pretty late at night, so already you got an additional parallel.
Ras turns around to see Beatrix approach, he gets her name right the first time, but then proceeds to ask if she could be Zeatrix instead in a slightly fake tone. She reacts angrily, of course, and Ras feigns surprise at getting it wrong, and bows respectfully, as a means of apology. This was the immediate start to his manipulation, in "confusing" their names, he was feeding into Beatrix's anger, which he continues to do in this scene, and then later on with Jordana, both in the s1 finale and in season 2!
When Beatrix says she's interested in Ras' offer of unlimited power, he seems like he may be genuinely shocked at her willingness to join him, however given the tone he takes on, this may be another tactic to further play into her anger, asking her why she'd do it so she could explain, and just get even angrier.
When Beatrix vents about how Zeatrix's birth robbed her of elemental power and Levo's father, Ras says elemental power is a cheat, and someone who may not deserve it gets it anyway, this time wearing his manipulation on his face with a smirk, he Wants her angry, he wants her rage.
Ras then fakes a scoff and waves his hand around, asking a question he likely already knew the answer to, about Zeatrix being the future Empress of Imperium, and getting Beatrix even Madder as she explains she will be left with nothing, while Zeatrix gets everything.
Ras smirks yet again, and claims it to be a waste of her "true potential." Now, I have made a post about this specific line before (which I can no longer find) but basically, I think him putting emphasis on the "true potential" is Also meant ot anger her. Why?
Aside from real-world usage, in Ninjago, ones True Potential is, as we all know, them unlocking their element properly, so in saying it's a "waste of her True Potential," it's like Ras wants to rub in the fact that she lacks powers, that she can never Have that moment like her sister, where she finally figures out what holds her back, and unlocks her powers, because she's powerless.
Beatrix asks Ras to help her in seizing the throne, offering him the resources he needs to capture a Source Dragon, and in response, Ras bows to her, as he did earlier, and he goes "As you wish, Empress Beatrix," and he smiles yet again, he's succeeded, he's manipulated Beatrix, he's gotten her angry enough that she's willing to trust him, and murder her father to seize control.
Everything Ras did in this scene was to feed into her anger, hell, the way he glances at her at the end of the cold open, part of me thinks he Knew she was gonna follow, maybe he was anticipating it, hence, the glance. Ras was angry only until he needed to manipulate, in which case he became this instigating force, there to listen to Beatrix's rage, and make her even worse.
#GOD IM SO AUTISTIC#THIS IS SUCH A GOOD FUCKING SCENE#LIKE IF YOU WANT ME TO ANALYZE MORE !!!#ninjago#ninjago dragons rising#raine's rambles#ninjago spoilers#raine's analysis#ninjago analysis#if u read this whole thing u get a cookie <333
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sorry for nagging you but i wanted to ask if you have some tips on making comics. I’ve trying making many comics but i always lose motivation and can’t seem to get past even the first panel sometimes.
I did make a pretty long post here, with some advice for starting out! But that’s more technical I guess, and it sounds like maybe you’re looking for some motivational advice? So in addition to that post, I’d say…
Don’t look at these panels where you’re stuck as failures. Look at them, instead, as first drafts!! Keep the early planning stages loose, so it doesn’t feel like an arrow to the heart if you have to make changes. Many artists need to see their thoughts collected somewhere before they can refine things and move on to the next stage. Another big thing is learning to be okay with throwing those drafts away when they become more of a roadblock than a step towards that awesome, final version you’ve got knocking around in your head.
I can’t tell you how many times I’ve spent an hour plotting the composition of a panel…or maybe I’ve gotten too focused on the little details of a character’s expression, but the rest of the shot has just….idk died. I’ll copy and paste what I did like, and delete what’s not working or I’ll completely start over, no fuss. Wipe my hands of it and refuse to look at it as a failure. If I drew it once, I can draw it again! Practice isn’t time wasted, it’s time invested into growing! Drawing is drawing!
It’s always good to look back at your work, so you can see your improvement, but only focusing on your unfinished pieces might be doing more harm than good.
And maybe, you don’t have to draw a full 10 page comic from the get go! Try experimenting with shorter form comics! You can tell quite a number of stories in just a few panels! Learning the ins and outs of something new is a lot easier to accomplish when it’s done in smaller increments. That way you can have that feeling of success more often and it’ll motivate you into not giving up!
When I started EW, I was doing parts in like, one or two pages! Because I was still nailing down the comic techniques I wanted to employ. I was gathering brushes and learning how and when to use them! Learning how to create compositions that worked around dialogue bubbles! All the boring parts of comic creating lol. But then, the more comfortable I became with those techniques, the less time they took, and I could really go wild with the creative aspect! Now my updates are much longer!
It’s just a process. But at some point, all the advice and resources in the world can only help so much. You have to be willing to put in the time!
I’d say it’s kinda similar advice they give when you start working out. When you’re first starting, and you try to do more than your body is comfortable with, you’ll be in a lot of pain and won’t want to continue. It’s easy to give up if you’re not seeing results and you feel like you’re wasting your time. But if you start in a reasonable place, and let yourself learn as you go, then you can gain good habits and it’ll get easier!
And only then, when it’s easy, that’s when you challenge yourself! Not when you’re already struggling with just starting! Or it won’t be fun and all of your drive will disappear!
And that’s really what you’re doing this all for, right? For fun!
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