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cripplecharacters · 8 months

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Media Representation and Writing Characters with Facial Differences

[Large Text: Media Representation and Writing Characters with Facial Differences]

A writing (?) guide (?) consisting of an explanation of what facial differences are, some basics about the community of people with facial differences, a terminology guide that is extremely subjective, a very long explanation of the real-life effects of misrepresentation of facial differences, a subjective guide on why most tropes surrounding facial differences are awful and unoriginal, and the part that people actually want to see (I hope at least) AKA "types of characters I do actually want to see". As always, this post is meant for people who have no experience with the subject, and not in any way an attempt to tell writers with facial differences on what to do in their own writing.

What Does "Facial Difference" Mean?

[Large Text: What Does "Facial Difference" Mean?]

"Facial Difference" (FD for short) is an umbrella term for any kind of scar, mark, or condition that makes your face visibly different. This encompasses anything from not having parts of the face or having less of them (e.g. anophthalmia, anotia, hemifacial microsomia), having "more" to the face (e.g. tumors, neurofibromatosis), conditions affecting how the face moves (e.g. facial paralysis, ptosis, cranial nerve diseases), ocular differences (e.g. hypertelorism, nystagmus, strabismus), conditions affecting the colors of the face (e.g. rosacea, vitiligo, pigmentation conditions in general), a "look" that signals a specific disability (e.g. Down Syndrome) and approximately a million more things - scars, burn marks, craniofacial conditions, ichthyosis, cancers, and a lot more.

Despite popular opinion (popular ignorance would be more accurate because no one knows about it in the first place but opinion sounds better-) people with Facial Differences have both a movement (Face Equality) and a specific word for the oppression we experience (Disfiguremisia). There is even the Face Equality Week that happens every year in May! This is a real thing that has been happening, and we are generally going unnoticed, even in the "representation matters" circles, the body positivity movement, disability spaces, and so on. There is an alliance of organizations dedicated to this called Face Equality International, who can help you learn about the real-world community and movement! They even have sections specifically about media representation, which is foreshadowing for how important this topic is to the community and for how long the "explaining the issues of representation" part of this post is.

And of course, if you have a facial difference/disfigurement, you can do whatever the hell you want when writing! Call your characters how you call yourself, subvert the tropes you want. I don't want to preach to people who already know all of this firsthand. This post is meant to explain some things to people who don't have experience with having FD.

Terminology

[Large Text: Terminology]

There is a lot of words to describe people with FD. Some of them are alright, most of them are awful.

Please keep in mind that all of these terms (maybe except for the... last one...) are used by real life people. This isn't me saying "you can't say that about yourself" (more power to you!) but rather to educate able-bodied people that some words they refer to use with aren't as neutral as they think (at least not to everyone).

"[person] with a facial difference" - generally the most polite and widely accepted way to refer to us. That's what is generally used in the Face Equality movement, sometimes alongside the next term which is...

"[person] who has a disfigurement" - an alright term that is sometimes used interchangeably with the one above. However, most things that involves the term "disfigurement" to me sound kinda medicalized and/or like lawyer speech. It's not offensive, but just generally used in more official ways etc. Has the potential to make you sound like a medical report or a legislature sometimes. lol.

"A disfigured [person]" - starting to steer into the "uhh" territory. Describing a whole person as disfigured is, to me, just plain weird. I get that some communities push for the identity first language, but this just isn't it most of the time. Could be way worse, could be slightly better.

"[person] who has a deformity" - "deformity" is such a negatively charged word that I don't understand how people (without FD) still use it thinking it's neutral. This sounds awkwardly medicalized in a "case study from the 80s" way which is definitely not a good thing.

"A deformed [person]" - pretty much the jackpot of bad terminology, the term deformed, the calling of an entire person by it, it has everything I hate about writers describing people like me. The only one that I think is even more awful is...

"Horribly/gnarly/nasty/monstrous deformity/scar/[name of the specific condition]" - again, I'm impressed by what some people think is neutral wording. If you're searching a thesaurus for synonyms of "scary" to describe your character, I think it's time to just stop writing them. This is about using ableist terminology, sure, but I just can't imagine that someone calling their character that actually will represent FD well. It shows the negative bias and attitude of the writer.

However, there is also one pretty awesome and simple way to describe them!

Say what they have specifically. Really. Assuming you know what condition your character has (which... you should) it should be very easy. "She has Treacher-Collins Syndrome." "Xyr forehead has a port wine stain on it." "They can't fully open one of their eyes." It's clear and lets your readers know what you mean. You don't always have to throw around euphemisms to describe someone not having a nose.

Tropes and Current State of Representation

[Large Text: Tropes and Current State of Representation]

If you have read basically any of my previous posts about FD then you probably know what I'm about to say in this section. Still worth a read though? I hope. Warning that this is long, but you probably expected that already.

One thing I will note at the start is that I'm aware that a lot of writers were already turned off from this post just because of the terminology section. I know that artists love describing people like me as ugly deformed monsters! It's literally a tale as old as antiquity, and that's how overdone and stale it is. Visibly disabled = ugly. I get it, I heard it a thousand times before, I hear it majority of the time someone is excited to tell me about how horrible and gross their OC's scar is. But now some guy (me) from that group is telling you to like, maybe stop calling your disgustingly deformed character that!

I want to make it very clear that FD representation in media is not treated like a real thing that's worth anyone's time, even by the most "representation is so important!" writers. I guess it's too inconvenient to unpack the amount of baggage and uncomfortable implications this would cause. It's too good of a device in writing; everyone knows that if a guy with a scar shows up that it means he's evil, the easiest way to make a villain visually interesting is to make them a burn survivor, and if you need a tragic backstory for a serial killer just give them a congenital disability that caused literally everyone in the world to treat them horribly, so of course they started killing people. It's such a good moral signifier that literally every book and tale has done - pretty is good, ugly is bad. Dichotomy is so helpful. What is less helpful in the real world is that what is considered "ugly" is generally very tightly bound to what visibly disabled people look like. Ugly Laws weren't just like, coincidentally including disabled people and disability activists aren't still forced to speak out against being put in those "Ugliest People" lists by accident. This is all to say that facial differences are considered to be "ugly" completely uncontested, and you probably have this bias too, as the vast majority of people do. The whole "the character is ugly, then they become evil, if they're evil, they become ugly"... you need to be conscious to not do that. Don't make them evil if they're visibly disabled because it will always end up being the same old trope, no matter how many weird excuses and in-universe explanations you give. I want to put it in people's heads that you are writing about a community of people who are technically visible in real life, but have no large voices that the general public would listen to when it comes to how we are seen. The general public relies on media to tell them that.

Putting people with FD in your books or your art seems to suddenly be intimidating for a lot of artists when they realize that not only is facial difference a real thing, but people who have it can see what you write or draw (and your other readers will take some things out of what you write, subconsciously). When an author is faced with the fact that maybe they are doing harm with their writing, they either: suddenly don't want to do that anymore at all, or say: "I don't care! I'm going to be very innovative and make my very evil OC be deformed!" which is kinda funny to me that people actually seem to think it's edgy and cool to repeat the most tired Hollywood tropes but that's the best we can get I guess lol...

The attitudes that people have around the topic of facial difference and the whole "media impacts reality" are very interesting to me in general. On one hand, when I tell someone that I was bullied or ostracized because of my disabilities, no one is ever surprised. On the other hand, everyone is for some reason uncomfortable when I say that this doesn't just... appear out of thin air. People are taught from childhood that facial differences and the people who have them are scary, untrustworthy, or literal monsters. Media is a major factor in that. Like, looking back at it, it makes sense that my parents told me not to stare at other kids because they would get scared. After all, I looked like a kindergarten version of the bad guy from some kid's book. Other kids were able-bodied and looked like the good guy, I was visibly disabled and looked like the bad guy. That's the lesson kids get from media on how people with visible disabilities are: evil, scary, not to be interacted with. So they avoided me because of that while I had adults telling me to not even look in their direction. Dichotomy is so helpful, right?

And this doesn't magically stop at children. When I post a self-portrait or a selfie, I usually deal with multiple grown people comparing me to sometimes an animal, usually a specific character from a movie, sometimes even making my face into a meme right away. But if people don't generally see people with facial differences on the daily, then how are there so many specific reactions and so many similar problems that we go through? If it's so rare, then how are people so quick to tell me the character I remind them the most of- Yeah, media. It's always media. It's almost funny how everything circles back to one thing.

I want you, the author, to understand the impact of misrepresentation of facial difference. If you feel uncomfortable because you have done these tropes before, good! That's a sign of growth. If you want to help instead of harm, you need to get over your (subconscious) biases for a minute and think about how a person with the same condition as your character would feel like reading about them. Maybe you are even currently realizing that that one OC with scars is just five harmful tropes glued together. Maybe you are going to reblog this and tell me in the tags that somehow your character decided to be like that, as if they have free will instead of being written by a biased human being. Or, as I said earlier, a lot of people will be annoyed by this post and keep doing their thing. Which is like... whatever, I guess ?? There are a dozen huge movies and TV shows every year that do this. It's so basic and normalized that whatever reach this post will have will change very little. I have been signaled "we don't care what you think about how we portray people like you" my entire life, I'm frankly more surprised when people do actually claim to care. You can, practically speaking, do whatever because the FD community is fully ignored by uh, everyone, and even if I'm disappointed or annoyed I'm just one man and I know (from experience) that most people won't have my back on this topic. It's too ingrained in our culture at this point to challenge it, I suppose. I mean, there have been multiple media campaigns telling writers to treat us as people, and they had practically zero impact on the writing community. But even with my absurdly pessimistic view on this subject, I still decided to write all this. Sure, there are no signs of the industry changing and the writing community doesn't seem to care much, but I still naively hope that maybe the right person will read this and at some point in the future I will be watching or reading about a character that looks like me and actually have a good time, and even more naively that maybe people will gain some amount of awareness of the damage that has been and still is happening to people with FD through media, so that the next time they see that the villain has facial scars for no reason they will think "damn, this sucks" the same way I do. And very, very naively, I hope that people who read this will start seeing us as people. Not villains, not plot devices, not monsters.

Sad part over(?), now the fun(?) part. AKA the tropes! Yay.

"Dramatic Reveal of The Deformity".

Use of the word "deformity" very much on purpose here. This is arguably the most common trope when it comes to FD, and it's always awful. At the very best it links FD with trauma and talks in a Very Sad Voice about how having a FD is the worst thing imaginable, I guess (think a "X did this to me... now I'm Deformed For Life..." type of scene) and at worst it does the classic revealing that the main villain actually was a burn survivor under his mask, because of course he was. In media, people with FD are evil. If they're not, then it's because someone very evil did it to them (the most evil thing of all - causing someone to have a facial difference. the horror!). It can't be a thing unrelated to someone's morality, there's gotta be evil somewhere around it. There is literally nothing good about this trope. Showing FD as something to hide? Check. Dramatizing FD? Check. Placing the way someone's face looks as the worst thing possible? Check. General treating FD as some kind of circus attraction to stare at with your mouth open? Check!

"Wearing a Mask*."

I made a whole post about this one actually, that's how much it annoys me. Putting your character with FD in a mask is so overdone, lazy, and boring I'm not even offended as much as I thought I would. It's like... really? Again? For the millionth time, the character with FD is forced to hide their disability? Is the author scared..? What is the point of giving your character a visible difference if all you're doing is hiding it? And yes, I know that your character chose to do that for reasons that you as a writer somehow can't control. It's always so strange how it's the character that's in control and the writer is in the passenger seat when it comes to annoying tropes.

Found yourself already waist-deep into this trope? Take a look at this post I made.

*"mask" here refers to anything that covers the character's facial difference (e.g. eye covering, surgical mask, whatever. It's about hiding it and not a technical definition of "what is a mask").

"Good Guy has the Tiniest Scar You Can Imagine, but Don't Worry! The Villain is Deformed As Hell."

A genre on its own. In the rare instance that a positive character has a facial difference, they have a curiously limited choice - you can have:

the thinnest, definitely-very-realistic straight line going through the eye (the eye is always either perfectly okay or milky for reasons the author couldn't tell you),

the same exact line but going horizontally across the nose,

and if you're feeling spicy you can put it around the mouth,

regardless of location, just make sure it doesn't look like an actual scar (certainly not a keloid or hypertrophic one) and is instead a straight line done with a red or white crayon. Interestingly, villains have unlocked more options which stem from scars, craniofacial conditions, burn marks, cleft lips, ptosis, colobomas, anisocoria, tumors, facial paralysis, to pretty much everything that's not infantilized, like Down Syndrome. These are always either realistic or extremely bloody. I sound like a broken record by now, but no, your morality has nothing to do with your physical appearance and being evil doesn't make a visible disability get more visible. Shocker. And don't get me started on...

"The Villain turned Evil Because They Have Scars."

Ah, how nice. Disabled people are evil because they're disabled, truly a timeless classic for able-bodied writers whose worst fear in life is being disabled. In case that needs to be said, having a facial difference doesn't turn you evil, doesn't make you become a serial killer, doesn't make you violent, doesn't turn you into an assassin with a tragic backstory seeking revenge for ruining their life. If anything, having a FD makes it more likely for other people to be violent towards you. Speaking from experience.

"The Villain Just Has Scars."

An impressive attempt at cutting out the middleman of "clumsily and definitely not ableist-icly explaining why getting a scar made them evil" and not even bothering with a tragic backstory or anything. They are evil, so of course they have a facial difference. What were you thinking?

"Facial Difference is a Plot Point."

As anyone who's read like A Book will tell you, the only way to get a facial difference is to be in a very dramatic fight or an extremely tragic accident who will become a plot point and thus the facial difference is now Heavily Emotionally Charged and a symbol of The Event/The Tragedy. If you look at media, congenital FD isn't a thing, illness-related FD doesn't exist and boring domestic accident or a fall causing FD has never been seen. It has to be dramatic and tragic or else there's no point in them having it. A true "why are they [minority]" moment, if you will.

"Character gets a FD but then Gets Magically Cured Because They're Good."

Truly one of the tropes that make me want to rip my hair out. Curing your character with FD sucks just as much as curing a disabled or neurodivergent character. Who is this even for? That's not how real life works. This is some actual Bible shit, that's how old this trope is. The only thing you're doing here is making people think that those who do have FD just aren't "good enough". Every time I see it, I wonder what the author would think of the congenital disorder I have. According to this kind of in-universe rules, was I born evil and just never got good? or ??

"Character with FD has Self-Esteem Issues and Hates Their Face."

I admittedly mocked all the previous tropes because they're absurd, ridiculous, offensive, boring, all of the above, and have zero basis in reality. This one however... ouch, right in my own tragic backstory. This is unfortunately a very real experience that a lot of people with FD go through. I even have a hunch there wouldn't be as many if the general public didn't think of us as monsters, but I digress. Yes, a lot of us have or had self-esteem problems, and a lot of us wished that we wouldn't have to go through all the BS we were put through because of it. Thankfully for you, you don't have to write about it! Seriously. You don't need to. As one million people have said before me, "maybe don't write about things you haven't experienced" and I agree here. I have yet to see an able-bodied author get anything about this right. Instead of the deeply personal, complex experience that involves both you, everything around you and the very perception of what others think of you that this is, somehow writers keep giving the tired "character crying and sobbing because they're "ugly" now", because the author thinks we're ugly. Or maybe they're sad because all the other characters with facial differences are evil, and they didn't have the time to prepare their evil monologue for when they inevitably become evil in the sequel? Who knows.

"The Author Doesn't Know."

I'm not sure if a trope can be the lack of something like this, but the author not knowing what their character actually has going on medically is common to a ridiculous extent - this applies to all kinds of disabled characters as well. You don't need to name-drop the Latin term for whatever your character has, but you need know what it is behind the scenes. You need to know the symptoms. You need to know the onset and the treatment or lack of it. Please do your medical research.

Things I Want to See More of in Characters with Facial Differences

[Large Text: Things I Want to See More of in Characters with Facial Differences]

The thing you might have noticed is that I want Facial Differences and People with Facial Differences to be presented as normal. Not killers, not SCP anomaly whatever, not monsters. I'm aware that the term is tired, but I absolutely want Facial Differences normalized as much as possible.

I want to see more characters with facial differences...

who have friends that don't bully or make fun of them because of their appearance.

who have support from their family.

who know other people with facial differences - even if they're just background characters, or mentioned in passing. Marginalized people tend to gravitate towards each other, people with FD aren't an exception to this.

who are queer.

who aren't only skinny white cis dudes in general.

who are disabled in other ways! A lot of us are Blind, Deaf, both, unable to speak, intellectually disabled, having issues with mobility, and a million other comorbidities.

who are fantastical in some way - preferably not the "secretly a monster" way. But a mermaid with CdLS or an elf with neurofibromatosis? That's cool as hell.

who are allowed to be cute or fashionable.

who have jobs that aren't "stereotypical bad evil guy jobs". Give me a retail worker with a cleft lip or a chef with Down Syndrome!

who are reoccurring characters that just happen to have a FD.

who are those stock/generic characters that aren't typically associated with FD. Hero's mom has septicemia scars? Cool! The popular cheerleader at school has alopecia? Awesome! The bartender of the place the heroes secretly meet up at has Möbius Syndrome? Goes hard! The kid that the MC used to hang out with before they moved somewhere else has Crouzon Syndrome? Great!

who have their FD be visible.

who aren't ashamed of their FD.

who are feeling very neutral about their face.

who are proud of how they look.

who got their FD in a very boring way or were just born with it (and maybe make up very silly, obviously not real ways of how it happened when annoying people ask them. Think "oh, I was fighting a shark").

who have facial differences other than small scars.

who's angst is fully unrelated to their FD. I love me an angsty teen character! Even more if they are angsty about their crush, or basically anything that's not their disability.

who have a significant other who doesn't do the whole "I love you despite your looks" thing. It just kinda sucks. Sorry. I would hate if someone said this to me.

who are children and aren't implied to be "cursed" or "demonic".

in genres that aren't just horror or thriller. RomCom or slice of life, anyone?

who aren't evil.

I want to see stories with multiple characters with facial differences. I have nerve damage and facial asymmetry, and I am friends or mutuals with people with Williams Syndrome, Bell's palsy, Down Syndrome, neurofibromatosis, facial atrophy, ptosis... and a lot of other things. Your character would have (or, would probably want) some connection to their community. We aren't rare!

And, I want stories with the whole spectrum of facial differences shown. Of course you can't represent the whole spectrum, but you can still aim for at least a few. Don't give every single character with FD the same scar-through-eye + eyepatch combo. It's not unrealistic to have a range in your writing. Here is a list of facial differences you might want to check out for inspiration. Don't be scared to give them something rare - no matter how uncommon, people still have it. My specific condition is allegedly extremely rare - I still want representation!

Closing Remarks

[Large Text: Closing Remarks]

Facial difference and the media is a topic that plagued me for the past almost two decades and won't stop ever, I think. It's a very unique relationship of a group of people who just aren't allowed to get into the industry and an industry that clearly hates them, loves to use their image, and defines how people see them all at once. There's this almost overrepresentation that is consistently awful and damaging to an absurd degree. Most people know more villains with FD than actual people. Certainly doesn't feel great to be one of the aforementioned actual peoples. But I hope that this will change - the negative portrayals that are plaguing the FD community will slowly fade out and a newer wave of portrayals will come in, hopefully this time realizing that we are real people and care about us a bit more.

The thing with facial difference is that it's pretty much impossible to make a specific guide of what it's like and what to do in context of writing because it's an incredible vast category that includes conditions that are very different from each other. That's why this post was more focused on "why you should care in the first place" (sorry for the clickbait) rather than being a straightforward guide that would still be very lacking even if 20 different people were collaborating on it. I really, really encourage everyone who got through this rather long post to do their research on what they plan to write about, be conscious of their own biases, don't pull inspiration from movies because they're all hellholes full of tropes and just sit down for a minute, think of the real-world people with facial differences, and read what we have to say. I know that drawing a guy with a line across his eye is more fun than realizing you're low-key scared of or uncomfortable around the real-world equivalent, but sometimes you have to get over yourself and try to be a better person. Caring about the people you write about is, dare I say, essential. That will certainly make your writing of us better :-) (smiley face with a nose)

If you have any specific questions, feel free to send an ask

Mod Sasza

#mod sasza #face difference #writing advice #writing ref #writeblr #writing disabled characters #long post #writing reference #writing resources #writing guide #writing resource #writing tips #writing help #burn survivor representation

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fancyfade · 23 days

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Thinking about the representation of characters with chronic pain and... part of why I don't believe that any writer besides the batgirls writers was ACTUALLY trying to represent invisible disabilities with babs is because being an invisibly disabled person with chronic pain does not mean that you do everything an able bodied person does, but with one line that things hurt or you have to be careful.

Like now I use a wheelchair, but I used to do karate when I was still getting fibro. There was a bit where we all had to run for conditioning, and I had to sit out . Not "oh no this will feel in my knees". If I ran I would be able to do nothing else bc how much pain there would be. I still could do kata and stuff and sparring (probably unwisely) with a bunch of braces on every joint (ankles, knees, wrists, elbows), because that was low impact and hurt less. And I was completely wiped out after practices and lessons.

But my point is - being an active person with chronic pain does not mean looking like an able bodied person. Obviously it changes based on severity, and each person's individual experience, but I'm like... really babs has chronic pain and potential risk of reinjury and she's keeping up with the other batfam members on the rooftops in fear state? She's frantically lifting rubble and not immediately collapsing the instant she hears the people she was trying to rescue are safe? She pretty much just does everything an able bodied person does, but since the author said she had a back brace were supposed to pretend its reprentation and not CYA for ableism?

Like. Should note - I don't want babs to be a part time wheelchair user with chronic pain. I'm fine not being represented in this way, because she originally had another disability that was erased. But it's baffling to me when people act like dc actually intended her to be representation for people with invisible disabilities. I mention batgirls being an exveption bc that was what inspired this post - I was so surprised to see babs mention not getting up because her back hurt that I was like "wait literally no other writer of this era has done that amd acted like her disability might affect what she does'

#like inb4 i still dont like the Batgirls thing #but reading more comics of this era its like .. ok so that's the only place where dc pretends its for rep #and thats probably on the vwriters not the company #dc comics #barbara gordon #disabled characters #chronic pain

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five-thousand-loaves-of-bread · 1 year

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“people only say i’m low support needs / high functioning autistic because i can speak 🙃” often followed by this is why functioning labels are BS or support needs labels are bad or why they are actually high support needs they just internalize it (while being able to perform bADLs and some iADLs independently on typical day, able to keep own safety, etc).

while able to verbally speak is not the only way to have significant support needs or be low functioning, being nonverbal not required to be high support needs (and also some nonverbal ppl aren’t high support needs),

being nonverbal or nonspeaking or minimally verbal is a significant thing that requires a lot of help, and it often doesn’t exist alone. as in, the people who say the quote above don’t realize nonverbal people are not “just like them but just can’t speak.”

being nonverbal/nonspeaking/minimally speaking/unreliably speaking (unreliable as in apraxia not as in lose speech) by itself is a thing that need significant attention to because need give extra! additional! support to gain functional communication. for most (if not all!) nonverbal nonspeaking people, functional communication is not guaranteed, it doesn’t develop naturally like most speaking people, either because of skills barrier, or external barrier like lack of resources, or both.

so, being nonverbal alone needs often intensive and long term intervention like speech therapy and AAC. even if you do everything right, give the most up to date affirming therapy, learning any AAC takes time, whether high tech or low tech. and they almost always require external help to reach their full communicative potential.

being able to functionally communicate (speech/sign/AAC, etc, but society put most emphasis on speech so you will have easier time if can speak) is such a fundamental part of our lives, it is severely limiting when you don’t have access to it. it inherently puts you at a disadvantage.

but being nonverbal often don’t exist alone.

being nonverbal means you have trouble with expressive language. sometimes that expressive language trouble is just you can’t speak.

but more often, there is more. like trouble communicating with more than one word at a time / multi word phrases / short broken sentences. or have small or basic vocabulary. difficulty remembering words. cannot grasp basic or complex grammar. have trouble find words. etc.

others may have extremely limited expressive language in all areas, even if you give them the best AAC and instructions, give them picture cards and photos, give them pen and paper, etc. yes, there are nonverbal people who may not be able to ever learn most or any form of AAC for it to be functional or reliable.

many nonverbal people may also have receptive language issues and have trouble understanding language. they may not understand the question being asked or the instructions given to them. they may only learn to read picture books with simple sentences, or not learn to read at all.

or, they also have intellectual disability, which affect everything not just language. they may be nonverbal because of their ID. they may struggle with everything above, and have trouble with problem solving, have trouble understand cause and consequence (not just rewards/punishment), difficulty remembering things, developmental delay, etc.

or, they have global apraxia (full body apraxia), or severe dyspraxia, which means they have trouble coordinate movements. they may have trouble dressing themselves, feeding themselves, physically follow directions, fine motor, gross motor, drooling, etc.

i have heard nonverbal people w severe full body apraxia describe it as a brain-body disconnect, their body have mind of its own. their mouth make noises they don’t want to make and cannot control, their body point to “yes” for a question when they mean “no” (so you can see how this impacts AAC use, yes?), their body running around when they just want to be still, etc.

it gets even tricky because! many of our understanding of intelligence and IQ tests require good enough motor skill. they assume that the way you act is the way you are internally. they assume you pointing to “no” when being asked “is the sky blue” if you genuinely not understand color, the sky, or language, not that your body pointed to the wrong thing.

many people w ID have poor motor skills. but many people w severe apraxia don’t have ID.

and this is just things i’ve seen in nonverbal autistic people. there are so many nonverbal people who are nonverbal because of brain damage, genetic disorders, and so on.

not to mention that being nonverbal and not having access to functional communication—not able to communicate what you want, don’t want, boundaries, socialize, etc. is a frustrating experience to say the least. having someone speak over you, make every decision for you, assume you can’t understand (whether you can or not), not even bother speaking to you, talking about you in front of you, etc. and when nothing else works, and you are frustrated and in overload, you meltdown, you “act out” to try to regain control or get others to listen to you, or you act out bc “other people say these things about me that’s not true so i might as well make it true.” then you get labeled with having behavior issues!

so yes, while it’s ignorant for people to dismiss speaking autistics just because they can speak, which is an issue that needs to be addressed, the way many low support needs speaking autistic talk about it is also ignorant.

#originally wanted to go in one direction but ended up going a different one instead??#sorry if the beginning doesn’t really correspond w the rest #actually autistic #actuallyautistic #actually nonverbal #nonverbal #nonspeaking #autism #autistic #🍞.txt

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wormbraind · 2 months

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based on @glassknee's post and @notevenalittle1294's addition, i present to you: the sims endbringer mod, pho style (but not really, this is a fictional sims forum)

♦ Topic: [Self-promo] Endbringer Mod In: Boards ► Modding FKNSHJ (Original Poster) Posted On Apr 20th 2012: Hi all. 🙂 I’m excited to share this mod I’ve been working on. It involves randomized Endbringer attacks. By default they’re fairly more common than they are in real life, happening maybe once every ten in-game years, but if you look at read_me.txt in the downloads I’ve enclosed information on how to alter the probability and how to trigger specific Endbringers as well as how to make them easier or harder to defeat. Besides that I also included CC and a few Easter eggs that won't affect your gameplay.

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►termina2 (2011 Sim Comp Finalist) Replied On Apr 20th 2012: whoa, so cool :D i dont play with my sims much so ill try activating some endbringer attacks and see how it goes. im pretty bad at coding tho... ^_^

►tritebuilds (2011 Build Comp Semi-Finalist) Replied On Apr 20th 2012: Hey what the fuck? Endbringers aren't a joke. You've clearly never seen the aftermath of an attack, this is making a mockery out of the trauma of Endbringer victims such as myself. Who even comes up with this stuff???

►hshater Replied On Apr 20th 2012: im getting my popcorn lmfao

►termina2 (2011 Sim Comp Finalist) Replied On Apr 20th 2012: trite let's keep this civil, please, don't swear...

►oldlostsea Replied On Apr 20th 2012: Wait, isn't this the guy who posted those *suggestive* images of Leviathan?

►hshater Replied On Apr 20th 2012: +oldlostland what?? on here?? where?? not in a weird way like i don't want to see them but proof?

►oldlostsea Replied On Apr 20th 2012: +hshater Ok weirdo. It was on some PHO dupe (it has better information but worse moderation) and I only remember because it was weird + the random letter username stuck with me. I'll DM you the link once I find it.

►hshater Replied On Apr 20th 2012: +oldlostsea yeah yeah take your time. FJSKJ you've got anything to say for yourself?

►oldlostsea Replied On Apr 20th 2012: +hshater I found his account on the site and I downloaded the mod. Definitely the same person. The art style resemblance is uncanny. Sending you the link RN.

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►spaceg1rl (Suspended) Replied On Apr 20th 2012: why does the mod's art look like that? yeah he definitely wants to fuck them screenshot(64).png

►hole (Moderator) (2011 Simp Comp Winner) Replied On Apr 20th 2012: @spaceg1rl This is your fifth infraction this year. Suspended for two months.

►hshater Replied On Apr 20th 2012: +oldlostsea sorry i was walking my dog. and yeah that looks exactly the same as what spacegirl (rip) posted +hole i mean this as kindly as possible pleasedontgivemeawarning but with that username what grounds do you have to stand on

►hole (Moderator) (2011 Simp Comp Winner) Replied On Apr 20th 2012: @hshater It's a reference to Hole, the band, of which I made many Sims. You can see them in my Round 2 submission to last year's Sim Comp

►hshater Replied On Apr 20th 2012: yeah i'm sorry to break it to you but your tag says simp comp. congrats though!

►termina2 (2011 Sim Comp Finalist) Replied On Apr 20th 2012: i really love the atmosphere and the art and the cc... really surprised this was made by one person! good job!

►tritebuilds (2011 Build Comp Semi-Finalist) Replied On Apr 20th 2012: +termina2 You are literally contributing to the normalization of Endbringer attacks.

►termina2 (2011 Sim Comp Finalist) Replied On Apr 20th 2012: ?? im going to log off for a bit to work on a school project. really dont like how toxic you all are getting :( it's just a mod

►tritebuilds (2011 Build Comp Semi-Finalist) Replied On Apr 20th 2012: @cookiecrumbles @tenovertwosmallstones PLEASE remove this. It's extremely offensive and potentially f*tish content.

►cookiecrumbles (Moderator) Replied On Apr 20th 2012: I'm disabling replies while we discuss this. Please avoid harassing each other anywhere else in the meantime.

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#writing #parahumans #endbringers

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comradekatara · 3 months

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Toko? I’m interested since their dynamic is so under explored despite a lot of potential!

@leantailean asked: Zuko/Toph?

I definitely think that a lot of work has been put into zuko’s flustered blush in the “i’m going with zuko!” moment, but really, if someone you didn’t know very well grabbed your arm and proudly proclaimed that she wanted to spend time with you, you would get flustered too, assuming you were also the awkwardest boy in the whole world.

I do think their dynamic is very interesting in terms of foilage. toph is in a unique position to empathize with zuko not only because she was never subjected to his violence, but because she is also an abused disabled aristocrat who ran away from home to join the avatar. she’s really only heard about zuko through iroh, so she’s positioned to show him far more affection and understanding than the rest of group, who also foil him of course, but in far less materially concrete ways.

I do imagine them eventually developing a lovely friendship postwar, with toph sort of acting as zuko’s personal lie detector (he needs someone to help him pick up on social cues so bad), but as it stands, there isn’t much there wrt their friendship. toph is the one giving every time (empathy, advice, vulnerability), and zuko never actually gives anything back (besides simply burning her feet, which was an accident, he is also quite rude to her on their pseudo-field trip, which is understandable considering how stressed he is, but also, not great). toph is a very understanding and sympathetic person, but if zuko doesn’t make an effort to be kinder to the twelve year old child who has been nothing but gracious and helpful to him, at some point they will hit a wall.

as for romantic potential, this ship has always kind of baffled me because I truly see none whatsoever (sorry i guess). besides just the age gap, which i’ve already discussed as a sort of nonstarter involving many of these ships, and besides the kind of obvious (to me, at least) fact that they are truly the gayest members of the gaang, there’s the fact that zuko would simply be an awful boyfriend to toph, for the reasons i’ve listed above. to be frank, i don’t even think he knows her name.

i’m not saying i ship tokka, but i don’t really understand why anyone who ships toph with zuko (bad bf, doesn’t care about her, very little onscreen development) doesn’t just ship her with sokka (very good bf, her best friend, the central figure in her life, shielded her with his body from falling debris and held her hand with everything he had at the end of the world as they prepared to die together, etc etc) considering the age gap wouldn’t be a barrier (it is to me of course, but ymmv). i think the only real appeal is that people just wanna smash two fan-favorite characters together without really considering whether it narratively makes sense for them to do so. shrug

#prying-pandora666 #leantailean #asks #toph&zuko #toph #zuko #look. i love disabled homosexuals as much as the next disabled homosexual #but their dynamic is kind of go girl give us nothing #and that’s just platonically

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crookedkryptonitebeliever · 5 months

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this might be a touchy subject and you don’t have to answer but, as one myself, how would Yves act with a chronically ill/physically disabled person? or even someone who constantly deals with chronic pain that is debilitating for everyday life? btw i love your writing, no matter how cursed. 🤍

Yves feels his heart wrench whenever he sees you break down in tears, frustrated at yourself for not doing as well as other able-bodied people, frustrated that you have to surrender your autonomy at times to Yves. He truly does, he hates to see you in such a state. While he doesn't mind, even prefers you to be dependent on him due to his strong caregiver personality, Yves doesn't want it to be at the cost of your happiness.

He will read up on all the papers published about your illness or disability. Past and modern ones, there must be a pattern or some sort that he could identify. Yves will try his best to find a cure or at least something that will improve your symptoms greatly.

But the first thing he will get done is to talk to you. Discuss what you ultimately want; is it freedom you seek? His undying support? The unyielding truth that Yves will stay by your side no matter how bad it gets? Do you want to keep fighting for yourself, or do you want Yves to do it for you?

You will have the latest, cutting-edge prosthetics if you're struggling with an amputated limb or body part. All the helpful, relevant, accessible gadgets will be installed in the house in hopes of making your life much easier and giving back the level of independence you need to maintain your mental health. Yves will remember all your appointments for you, that fills his planners up. Your dosages, your medication, and the procedures of your treatments.

He will remind you, pre-pack your pills, and help you with your IV drip. Yves is very careful with his tone and words, he knows the stress, humiliation, and pain that come with living as a chronically ill person can easily set you off. Everything can be overwhelming, he does not want to see tears of anger or hopelessness in your eyes. It's not your fault, you never wanted this and it just happened to affect you.

Yves spends nights perusing through all experimental treatments, weighing between the risks and benefits. He will present his carefully curated selection to you, but he makes sure to pace it out appropriately. Because if he were to show you thousands of pages of medical reports, chances are you're going to be upset, overstimulated, and angry at him. You have very limited energy and focus, he needs to get his words as concise and accurate as possible.

Watching him kneel with you on the bathroom floor, as you experience your seventh vomiting tonight, truly shocked you. Understandably, you're in such a terrible state, that you've barely gotten any sleep for the past month. But Yves sleeps even less, he is always awake, always looking after you. Ready for any emergencies and constantly preparing items or foods that will ease you. Yet, he looks glowing, as if he wasn't caretaking a bleeding ball of misery. His hair is always silky and brushed, no bags under his eyes, and his movement is still crisp. And he always knows what to do, much better than you or your practitioners.

He knows your body well enough to administer his own dose of painkillers, going against doctors' orders and obtaining drugs that fully alleviate your pain. Strategically timing your doses so it won't be too hard on your liver. Taking your blood samples himself and ran them through his own trusted pathology lab, potentially proving that your doctor might have misdiagnosed you. Maybe you wouldn't need to suffer, Yves could find a cure.

You were very apprehensive at first when Yves suggested that he does his own testing. He has no credentials, why should you trust him? The doctors have much more experience than him and they went to school for this. You're not trusting a random to cut you open either, he's a mathematician, not a medical doctor or a surgeon-

You were dumbfounded when he produced his own certifications and licenses. Proving that he worked in hospitals, researched institutes, and even published his own medical papers that universities used as teaching material for decades. Everything he presented is legitimate, he even demonstrated the validity of them by your request. You could call his universities and they will all confirm his contributions, You can confirm with the government and the relevant boards, you can search for him anywhere, and early pictures of him will resurface.

He looked so different. Yves looked unremarkable in them with short hair. He looks unhappier and more exhausted, though. Makes you wonder how old he really is.

But that was all. You cannot find further information on Yves other than the ones he allows you to know about.

So you reluctantly let him stick a needle in you, only to realize that he's done. You blinked multiple times and darted your eyes from your arm and his gloved hands holding vials of blood. Unlike the usual nurses or doctors, you can't feel the needle going in or out. Yes, you saw it, but it was unbelievably fast.

Your jaw dropped as he didn't even need to palpate your arm. Yves just calmly inserted the syringe, gathered what he needed, and finished. You didn't experience any bruising later, which was astonishing with the speed he was working with.

He labeled them and packed them in a plastic bag with a biohazard symbol on it and into a padded envelope. Yves disposed of his gloves and washed his hands.

You expected him to enlighten you. Tell you stories while he was in the field, brag about his accomplishments, complain about difficult patients, anything! You needed to know more! Just who the hell is he?

But all he did was smile, give you a kiss on the forehead, and help you back to your room.

#yandere #yandere x reader #yandere oc #yandere male #yandere concept #yandere x you #tw yandere #yandere oc x reader #male yandere oc x reader #oc yves

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sopranoentravesti · 1 year

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Ok I’m FINALLY in a place where I have a minute and brain space to recount some of my Convention highlights:

I got 2 hugs from Nana Visitor. And she told me I look good as a Bajoran, asked me what I do, and when I told her, she asked what I do to take care of myself.

I also got told by multiple people that my eyes look similar to Nana’s (brown eyes next to the nose ridge?)

On Saturday, I wore my Kippah with my cosplay, going from Morning Services to Convention.

At one point, Robert Picardo was talking and John Billingsley was crouching down in order to surprise him and his face turned red. I thought he was having a heart attack.

I put my hand on his shoulder and was like “sir, are you okay,” until someone was like “he’s fine he’s just heckling Bob Picardo.”

Thankfully, he didn’t notice

I was a bit late for my photo with the (present) members of the DS9 cast. They had to bring Penny Johnson-Jerald back, but everyone was very gracious, understanding, and sweet.

“Who am I taking a picture with! Oh my goodness, you are too cute,” she (Penny Johnson-Jerald) also wanted to know my first and last name

They stationed Rosie, my Rollator, “center seat.” Terry Farrell complimented my vest, which I crocheted myself, and very excitedly told me she just learned how to crochet.

(I commented that despite my disability, I am unable to sit still and was taught to cope with hyperactivity and keep myself from fidgeting too bad).

J.G. Hertzler at one point approached me and was like “that [my Rollator] looks handy! Can I take a seat?” And growl chuckled and clapped my shoulder ( Klingon friendly style) when I was like “that is not honorable.”

Later he stopped me again. Apparently, one of his loved ones has MS, uses a rollator, but unlike Rosie, hers is not upright, and they are worried about it contributing to back problems. He wanted to know more, how to find one.

I asked Siddig a somewhat rambling question about Julian’s disability, Eugenics, and how that may have affected his relationship to other disabled characters, and disability in trek vs our Society as a whole.

I had my hand up for a minute and he was like “relax, you got next question” I was kind of embarrassed but then he was like “I don’t think you’re hyperactive, I just want you to not exhaust yourself“

He listened attentively, and he gave a vent like answer where he was like “I see your concerns about Star Trek obscuring / erasing disability… my general thoughts are that we are all racist (i was born in Arab Africa, in Sudan, riddled by geopolitical conflicts, Africans are also racist) we are all ableist, and all have the potential to be disabled . And unfortunately, it’s your job to appeal to me as an able bodied person, and my job to appeal to [another audience member] as a brown person …And why we need to work to change laws first, before we work on everything else. Sorry, didn’t mean to get all political.”

Later, I was sitting outside the venue for mingling because of autism ears and photosensitivity.

And he approached me and was like “hey, how are you doing? I just wanted to check in on you.”

Naturally, I aspirated my saliva and stammered something about avoiding the noise and migraines.

I didn’t think he remembered my name (one point I was attempting to steer around him and he was like “so sorry, sweet thing,”) but later when he was signing my autograph! He did! I did have to spell it, but I usually do anyways bc it’s spelled not the typical way.

At one point, I dropped a change of clothes I had packed and Bonnie Gordon came up to me “Darling, I thought your days as a stripper were over.”

Thank goodness I developed a tolerance for making a damn fool of myself.

There’s so much more. I met many cool people, including several folks I knew previously only on tumblr (hi, @xenobotanist @philosopherking1887 @cardassiangoodreads @ettaberrytea and multiple others I am forgetting just now) I got to hang out IRL with some people from the SidCity Social Club, which previously I only lurked at.

I’m still absolutely filled up with warmth. Like I can take anything

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neurosharky · 9 months

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How ASPD can be really dangerous

This post will only contain my own personal opinion and thoughts! It cannot be applied to every person with Antisocial personality disorder (ASPD)! We are all different!

Today I want to talk about some of the ways that ASPD can be really really dangerous! I think its super important to talk about the harm that can happen due to this disorder, even if its not a really pleasant topic. The following slides will contain some examples, but of course theres more to it, than I could ever mention here!

Mentions of physical harm, emotional harm, substances and similar things!

1. Physical Harm

People with ASPD may experience physical harm, due to their disorder! This could happen because of physical consequences from impulsive/reckless decisions, having been irresponsible with doctors appointments/medication/looking after themselves, or being so easy to anger & unable to stop themselves from provoking someone, that they end up in physical fights! Some people also cope with their ASPD & connected trauma by using substances, which usually have a bad impact on the body as well.

2. Emotional Harm

Emotional harm may be done due to losing relationships, of any nature, because of ones symptoms, being unhappy with ones way of dealing with things, being frustrated that the ASPD is ruining certain things like the chance at a future and similar stuff! Due to ASPD not being curable, it will always have an effect on someones life and one may grief what could have been, may experience a lot of unpleasant break-ups, job losses, arguments with people or personal failures, which can be hard to deal with! The symptoms affect a lot of different things and present themselves in multiple ways in every individual, so the exact harm may vary!

3. Developing other Disorders

If one has ASPD and is unable to cope with the symptoms, there is a certain risk of developing other disorders! This will look different depending on the individual, but may include: depression, anxiety disorders, eating disorders, addictions etc! It may also have a negative effect on already existing comorbidities such as other personal disorders, psychotic disorders, neurodevelopmental disorders and more! Individuals with ASPD may dismiss/be unable to care, or really do something about, their other disorders, which may worsen symptoms.

ASPD goes along with a disregard for ones own health and safety and due to impulsivity, law breaking, irresponsibility, aggressiveness and potentially also a momentary lack of danger awareness/non accurate judgement of the danger, people with ASPD can accidentally harm themselves pretty badly due to symptoms!

When we talk about this disorder we usually only talk about how the symptoms may harm other people (which is important), but we should focus on the individuals with the condition as well!

The disorder itself can do a lot of harm to the person having it and even more if its accompanied by outside factors such as stigma, trauma done to the person and more!

This is one of the reasons why its so important to make people with ASPD feel safe and welcome in therapy settings & support groups, as that can literally make the difference between life and death for them. Methods of coping with the symptoms, coping with the stigma & other peoples reactions, introduction to harm reduction, as well as support when it comes to building up a successfull life for oneself, are vital!

There are a lot of areas in which people with ASPD could get support, if it was finally recognized just how disabling this personality disorder can be and how important it is to focus on the harm done to the individual themselves as well!

So if you are a person with ASPD, know this: you are not alone with these problems! You are not the only one its happening too and even tho it can be really hard to deal with sometimes, there are methods and approaches that can help you and its 100% okay if you access those! They may not be specifically geared towards you yet, but if they help: get them!

If you have a person with ASPD around you: let them know you're there. Let them know you see the dangers and want to help them be safe! Whether that is that you are their impulse control, person they come to in order to discuss things before they go and have an argument, manage their doctors appointments and treatments for them so that they actually happen, remind them of looking after themselves & more. Every little bit of support can make a difference and even if they might not show it to you sometimes, I'm sure they'll appreciate the offered help! (tho ofc respect it if they don't want any!)

(first posted on my instagram)

#aspd feels #aspd traits #aspd thoughts #actually aspd #aspd #antisocial #antisocial personality disorder #aspd awareness #mental health #mental health education

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marc--chilton · 1 month

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henlo yes i hate that you can't ask with side blogs but whatever just going to out myself to my entire following (/hj) but like. mgv.

What do you think their scents would be like? Also, for fanfic purposes, how quickly do you think House would go into pre-heat after meeting Wilson (for context, I have a headcanon that if an omega who's been alone for too many heats meets what their more primal part of their brain decrees a potential mate, they go into heat early)

given how often medical workers have to sanitize for the safety of their patients, house and wilson probably have a decent amount of Clean Sterile Smell that lingers on them -- the ducklings too to a lesser degree probably. it's part of their scents but it's just because of their job so if they took a vacation it would fade after a while.

i imagine wilson would be like.... citrus-y. idk why but i'm getting orange vibes. citrus, and warmth. like a candle. yeah.... (zones out for a long time)

house.... i was thinking about this earlier. his disability affects his mood, and mood affects scents, so sometimes he smells more appealing, but on bad days you can almost taste his distress if it gets bad enough. sour, bitter notes more on your tongue than anything. otherwise he's fairly earthy, like a dry summer day, a little woody.... like a jogging path in a park. maybe even a little like artificial strawberry sometimes if he's really been gnawing on some suckers at ppth.

wrt the next question + your headcanon: ummm yoink! canon 4 me now. what if that was part of house finding wilson "interesting"? that specific word is vague enough to mean nearly anything, yet kind of a key word in the life of greg house at the same time. what was interesting, exactly? what if it was that hindbrain at play? something about this adorable alpha twink kicked some of those squashed and atrophied omega instincts into gear without house even realizing at first. it doesn't hit him until they actually talk a bit way later after wilson got bailed out that, oh, right, that's a thing that happens.

50/50 on if house keeps it to himself or if he casually propositions wilson like right there. they're at whatever hotel was booked for the conference and house says right as wilson is taking a drink, "huh. i think i'm ovulating. wanna do it?" and wilson nearly chokes to death

#asks #justaweirdonothingtoseehere #house md #i have had scent discussions with my mom over like candles laundry detergent etc #and we have a funny form of communication where i can just be like “this is a blue smell” and she's like “oh definitely”#i asked for her opinion too without explaining. all this. and she said wilson strikes her as peppermint #and house as like sandalwood and paprika #i haven't pondered the ducklings much but i figure the leading notes in cameron would be berries and cream #and chase probably smells like a nice mall circa 2003 #not quite ambercrombie but yknow. stylish scents #foreman.... a nice office. idk how to explain it #like dignified and detached but comforting but not homey #clean upholstery and a little cigar smoke. i dont know man foreman's cool

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wonder-cripple · 2 years

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I really don’t make posts like this ever, but I need to say something, and I need people to hear it and share it. I need this post to get LOUD.

Systemic ableism is affecting me so badly, it’s actively hazardous to my safety.

I got my doctorate in psychology back in April and a job offer in June. Two weeks later, an agency ready to hire me changed its mind, because their building had no elevator. They offered remote services I could’ve provided, but they chose not to hire me instead.

A similar pattern has followed over the course of over 70 job applications and interviews since then. Everything is fine, until I mention the wheelchair. That’s when the shadow crosses their faces and I can just tell that I’m not getting the job.

And the excuses just get flimsier. If it’s not office inaccessibility, it’s my inability to conduct home visits for similar reasons, or my inability to get out of my wheelchair to chase kids down hallways. Never mind the fact that there are a million approaches to therapy, a million potential workarounds, other staff that can help, the THOUSANDS of predoctoral school and clinical hours I’ve amassed. None of that matters, because these agencies don’t even TRY to be inclusive.

It’s starting to sink in that it might be years before I’m employed, if it ever even happens. And if I can’t get my two years of postdoctoral supervision, I can never get licensed. I can never start my own practice or get hired for a stable position.

And why does this matter?

Because gainful employment can mean the difference between life and death for disabled people. It could mean the difference between escaping abject poverty and not, surviving and not. Because our lives are expensive. Our needs are expensive.

Most importantly for me, it can mean the difference between an independent life and not having one. The ability to start a family versus not being able to, something that’s very important to me and all I’ve ever wanted. And every single fucking time an interviewer looks down in dismay when I mention my wheelchair, every single time I get a rejection email citing some form of inaccessibility, whether direct or indirect, my will to live shrinks that much more. Because I’m tired. I’m tired and I’m FURIOUS. This shouldn’t still be an issue in 2022. I did not devote literally my entire life to the pursuit of helping others feel better about life just to have every door slammed in my face because I’m disabled.

At my eighth birthday party, I had a “feelings corner”, where party guests feeling sad could come and talk to me in private about what was bothering them. I’ve wanted to do this for my entire life. Before I even knew it was something you could do for work. And I might not be able to. No matter how much I love it, no matter how much I want to use the skills I have to help people — especially marginalized groups — I might not get to. It might not happen. Because people are intimidated by the idea of a disabled professional.

My hope is just about gone, and if it wasn’t for amazing people like @kindred-sword distracting me from thinking the worst, and God forbid, doing the worst, I don’t think I would even be here to write this post. I would’ve been gone days ago. I’m fed up, I’m angry and I’m exhausted. Something needs to change, and soon. We matter. Our lives have value and so do our skills.

Disability is not and never was the problem.

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the-lincyclopedia · 4 months

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One of my primary beliefs is that anyone who wants to solve or mitigate a problem should care about correctly understanding the causes of that problem. And I find that often, people prefer to make assumptions about what causes the problem and then get upset when you challenge their assumptions, even when you're right.

I think those of us who are activists have a tendency to notice when people with power and authority make incorrect assumptions about us or about other people they have authority over. We help each other learn to notice this.

We know it happens in health care: We know that doctors often assume that a patient's symptoms are a result of the patient being fat, and that the patient "just needs to lose weight" in order to feel better, even when something entirely different is causing the symptoms. We know that psychiatrists sometimes assume that a woman having interpersonal issues must have borderline personality disorder or bipolar disorder, because obviously those are the right labels for difficult women, when actually she's autistic and the psychiatrist didn't bother to check.

We know it happens with how children are treated: Whether we're activists or not, many of us remember times when our parents or teachers acted like we were breaking rules or causing a scene for no good reason, when actually something was wrong and we were trying to solve the problem/get help/generally cope as best we could, and we just weren't asked why we were acting that way.

But the reason I'm making this post is because we, as activists, are not immune from making bad assumptions either.

So many people on this site, and in many activist spaces I'm in, talk as if every incident of harm (at least, every incident where "the other side" causes harm) involves deliberate malice--often nothing but deliberate malice. There's rarely any public consideration of other potential causes, such as genuine ignorance, competing priorities, differing but legitimate values, being stretched too thin, etc. Even greed sometimes gets left out of the conversation, despite the fact that I'm quite certain that greed is a more common motivator than sadism.

I want to be clear that I'm not making this point to cast the powerful as victims, to argue that they're misunderstood, or to scold you about being nicer to your oppressors. That is not my motivation.

I am making this point because when we assume that someone is motivated by malice and sadism when they're really acting from ignorance, greed, a different set of values, or a lack of time/resources to do things in the way they should be done, we are going to propose the wrong solutions.

A teacher who's not using universal design because they hate disabled kids and want neurodivergent students to suffer needs to be removed from the classroom. A teacher who's not using universal design because they don't know enough about it needs additional training. A teacher who's not using universal design because they're totally overwhelmed by having 35 middle school students in each of six periods throughout the day needs more resources and support. The problems look similar, or even the same, at first, but when you look closer, you see that different causes require different solutions.

Obviously, there are groups whose motivations are a lot less sympathetic than those of an overworked teacher. But even when it comes to, like, execs at health insurance companies, I'm guessing they're more likely to care about making money and be pretty apathetic about the details, rather than cackling gleefully at the thought of driving people to bankruptcy or causing them to suffer and even die for lack of care.

And if we want a more equitable world, I think it's logical and even vital that we know what causes the problems we want to solve, because that affects what the correct solutions are and can guide us in avoiding unintended consequences.

#a lin original #sj

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cowboyjen68 · 2 years

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Hi Jen. I’m in need of some encouragement. I love the idea of butchness. It just feels right. But when I look at myself it’s hard to see a butch in the mirror. I’m skinny and weak and recently disabled (bad back and knees… at age 19!), and I don’t have any strength or know-how (making/fixing things around the house for my girl) to offer a potential partner. I can’t even drive a car, much less fix one!

I want to be butch. I want to take care of my community and my girl. But I don’t feel like I can measure up. I look at other butches in my life and they have some sort of magical butch swagger that I don’t see in myself. How can I look, feel, act, and be butch… to myself, and to those around me?

I don't reallly like to be the judge and jurer of "butch" per se. I know another when I see her and to most people it is obvious. In my experience and opinion, you either are butch or you are not. It is easy because it is natural.

There are no body types, skills, hobbies, strengths or talents that all butches possess. We are as varied as any populationg. I know buthes who are fat, down right scrawy, work in offices, are afraid to get tattoos, build houses, babysit cats. I know butches with large breasts and some very small ones. My butch friends include jersey wearing sport lovers and those who work in the garden with wide brim hats and flowered garden gloves. Some drive old on the column shift square body Chevys and many more drive Priuses or modern crossovers. A few have wheelchairs and others use a cane or other walking aids.

Our body types and personalities do not define out butchness, however butchness may help for our likes and dislikes, we are not bound to rolls or rules. Butch is very much how we carry ourselves and that affects how others perceive us. We are often seen as "different" or "not good at being a woman" or "not like other girls". Sometimes we are seen as manly or non feminine or any number of words meant to pigeon hole women into a societal standard.

It does seem a often shared butch trait to feel especially protecting of the women in our lives, even those who are simply in our space temporarily and while not all of us are big courageous heros many of us feel good when we can be the safe person for other women.

I am 5′3, and 145 lb, by no means a large woman.I am not getting younger and with my shitty knees I have less of a swagger and more of an old lady hobble some days. Even with a pony tail and muscle shirt on (re no bra because I don’t wanna) I get clocked as something other than a woman when people have to make a snap decision and don’t really look. I can only describe it as our energy or the space we take up , or more way we exist in a space because there is not another word for it.

My suggestion is you don’t have to be sure. You need to get around other butches. Make friends with them and get an understanding of their experiences and see if you relate. If butch works for you there is no butch police (that I know of) to tell you you are wrong. And if it doesn’t fit, eventually you will understand why or why not.

At the end of the day you can be protective and loving, have a quiet power and learn anything you want from driving a big truck to building a bird house if that is what you want to do. One need not be butch to do any of that.

#butch #lesbian

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jasminedragonart · 1 year

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We're gonna do Treasure Planet because I love Treasure Planet.

Okay, first off, we all know this is based off Treasure Island so the plot is quite well known and, honestly, Disney knew that once the muppet version was released they could do nothing to compete against it so they had to go a different route which is how we got this beautiful movie.

I love the steampunk vibe. It's giving dystopian, it's amazing and you can really see the animators were having fun with experimenting with the character design.

We'll start with Silver. I liked his character design. In a lot of movies and adaptations they make Silver very capable and very mobile. They don't do this in Treasure Planet. Like you can tell this is a disabled man (cyborg) He has a very dog looking face, which is interesting in terms of symbolism because we could say he's like a dog with a bone, he won't give up until he gets this treasure but he's deteriorated along the way. You can tell that this quest has taken a lot out of him, not only his mind but his physical appearance. Like this man is half machine at this point and he doesn't shy away from that. Again, we see him struggle with his leg, he needs to take breaks which means, to the audience, that we don't expect a lot out of him physically. This is why we're quite surprised that he is very mobile when he needs to be such as when he's fighting Jim for the treasure. Mainly, however, Silver is made like this because we need to appreciate his mind rather than his physicality. We listen to Silver because he has very little else to offer in terms of character design, his words are what are important here not his strength. This is shown by him taking a leadership role when the mutiny occurs. Very rarely do we see Silver fight, again, he talks, he connives, he looks after Jim. And I did love that we saw Jim and Silver bond. Like you feel their connection in this film, they didn't gloss over that, they made it a struggle for him and it pays off, we are sympathetic to Silver at the end of the movie.

We'll move onto Jim. Why did they have to give us that song when his father goes off to sea? I feel like weeping every time I hear it, it's so sad and powerful and fits so well with the story because you can see this is a moment in time that has really affected Jim, he really loved his father and he wanted to go to sea with him, he's desperate for that paternal relationship. That's not to say he doesn't love his mother either. Like you can tell he does, he loves his mother so much but he's acting out because he's hurting and she doesn't know what to do with him. She doesn't have time because she needs to keep him safe by keeping a roof over his head. I love the parallel of his surf board thing being a hinderance in the beginning of the movie and then coming in handy at the end. I loved that. I thought it was poetic and it shows us as an audience that Jim isn't stupid. Like he has potential, but he's wasting it by getting into trouble. He made that board by himself, he literally attempts to fix Billy Bones's ship by himself and succeeds. Jim is actually really smart and it's quite nice to see that we can pick up on that within the first couple of minutes into the film. It makes the rest of the film, how Jim figures out the map and how the portal works actually plausible because Jim is capable of figuring things out, he's, again, not a stupid protagonist and we're shown this from the offset. It's very interesting that Jim's one of the only 2 humans in this film as well. They could have went full alien, but instead they made Jim human so he relates more to those at home who might also be feeling the way he does, aka abandoned and out of place in the world. It's also interesting because it does help to show just how alone Jim is. He literally only has his mother, there are no other humans but her in this film. It's very isolating.

Onto the professor and the captain. I liked them together. I liked the joke. You know, he's a dog, she's a cat, they're fighting like cats and dogs, it's funny. I liked all the star trek jokes they slid in there too 'I'm a doctor Jim!' like it works. It was great, their mutant babies were kind of cute, I liked it.

The crew was very interesting too. Like this film did a great job in making you feel for when the characters died. That guy who died, I don't remember his name but his rope was cut, I felt that, I really did. The sense of loss in this film is amazing. Like it is not easy to get an audience to empathise with characters, especially minor characters who die. But you feel it because it was a completely unnecessary and preventable death. It was murder, and that spider guy? Terrifying. I felt fear when he was on the screen, which is props to the colour and character design. He's red, which is our first immediate warning. Red is usually a colour associated with danger and blood so when he stands out and we see him we know that he's a bad guy. Also, he's a spider. A lot of people aren't fond of spiders and by creating this monster of a guy, like, yeah, I was scared when he was hiding in the ceiling, I still can't watch Jim looking for the map on the ship without feeling apprehension at what's going to happen. It's such good framing and storytelling, like it was an actual scary sequence.

The plot, again, we love it because it's Treasure Island and they did a great job in adapting it. You know it's a good film when you feel happy at the ending, and Jim ending up at the Naval Academy, Silver's constellation in the sky? It was great, I loved it. I love this movie, it's so good.

#treasure planet #disney

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