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#and i am going to miss a few things about processing this way
star-ocean-peahen · 1 year
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oh i don’t like this I don’t like this at all
i took a decongestant today and it’s being Really Weird because all my thoughts are round and soft and I’m not constantly aware of all stimuli and my thoughts keep stopping and starting and I can daydream for hours and hours without moving but I can’t make myself think about other people or plan for anything and I kinda feel like I’m not all here and did I mention the worst part:
i!! cant!! stim!! anymore!! none of them are comforting like they used to be and im not falling apart right now because this state of mind makes me feel nice and not need them and i felt exactly this way for years a few years back this is so fucking weird
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jorvikzelda · 1 year
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I started reading Lord of the Rings (bought Fellowship of the Ring like… last spring but never got around to starting) and I’d just like to say. Holy fuck what a slow book. You mean to tell me I’m over a hundred pages in and this man is only just leaving the Shire? Sign me up for MORE I love this shit. Tolkien said “I will take exactly as much time as I want to describe things and you will like it”. AND I DO
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soaps-mohawk · 4 months
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Cherry Red, Crimson Blood
Chapter 3 - Speak Their Language
Summary: You get something to aid you in your attempts to bond with your pack. Unfortunately, your ideas have consequences for everyone.
Pairing: Poly 141 x reader
Warnings: Alpha/Beta/Omega dynamics, Alternate Universe, a/b/o typical classism and sexism, some brief violent imagery but nothing worse than what's in the game, lots of military inaccuracies
Author's Note: Did you know there’s Scottish translators online? I do now lmaooo. Those military inaccuracies are really coming through in this one so...if you’re here for accuracy...I am so sorry. This one's a bit shorter, more of a filler for the next one but there's some important stuff that happens that you'll need for the next chapter. Also a lot of good ole easter eggs and references in this one. If you can find them all, I’ll give you a cookie. 
MASTERLIST | <- Previous | Next ->
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You perk up when a knock sounds at your door. You hop off your bed, eagerly swinging the door open. Price is standing there, a package in his hands. The corner of his mouth twitches as you smile, almost bouncing on your toes in excitement. 
“Kate said you’d be expecting this.” He says, amusement shining in his eyes. 
You nod, holding out your hands. “Yes, sir!” 
You take the package, holding it against your chest. You had sworn Kate to secrecy about what was in it, after a long explanation of why you needed it and why you were asking her for it and not Price. She said she threw in a few other things, things you didn’t realize you’d miss once you moved to the UK. You knew she likely did that so she wouldn’t have to lie to Price when he asked.
“Don’t have too much fun.” He says, giving you a smile. 
“I’ll try not to.” You grin. “Thank you, sir!” 
You close the door, not bothering to lock it as you bound back to your bed. You open the package, digging through the snacks to the bottom of the box. You move the box to the floor, holding the book in your lap. You run your hand over the cover, excitement thrumming through you. 
“The Powerful Omega.” 
You’ve spent the last few days running through what you remembered from the book the last time you read it almost four years ago. There wasn’t much, only a few things sticking with you. Things you thought would be helpful. 
You curl up on your bed as the others head out for the afternoon, the familiar sound of boots disappearing down the hallway fading into the background as you dig into the book. You’re determined to find some way to get Ghost to at least be tolerant of your presence. You don’t need him to want you, you don’t even need him to like you. You just know the entire process will be easier if he’s at least accepting of the fact you’re going to be part of the pack, whether either of you like it or not. 
That was long before you knew you’d be placed in a military pack, though. 
He’s a big, tough, military alpha who doesn’t like to show his face. There has to be something in the book that might help you, or at least give you ideas on what to try. You know the best you can do with Ghost is try. He’s an enigma on purpose, and it seems like he’s going to stay that way, regardless of how close you try and get to him. 
You could use Soap to get close to him. Ghost’s protective aura practically envelopes Soap whenever they’re in close proximity, laying a claim without even having to touch one another. You know getting close to Soap could force Ghost to get comfortable with you, or it might make him more territorial.
But that scene at breakfast a few days ago, when he’d gotten defensive over that soldier staring in your direction. 
You let out an exasperated sigh, opening the book. “Alphas are so infuriating for literally no reason.” You murmur to yourself. 
You read until another knock sounds at the door, signaling lunch. You use your note pages as a bookmark, stuffing the book into the back of your underwear drawer before opening the door. 
“Hungry, pup?” Price greets you as he usually does when he’s escorting you to a meal. 
You nod, stepping out and closing the door behind you. “Always, sir.” 
Like most omegas, you have a healthy appetite. It always gets bigger close to your heat, and you never quite feel satisfied and full during that time. You wonder how you’re going to manage on a military base with such a rigid schedule. There’s always snacks in the rec room, but you’re going to need a lot more than chips and protein drinks to keep you happy when the time comes. 
You follow Price to the mess, his arm brushing yours as you walk. You’ve noticed them getting closer to you over the past few days, at least in the literal sense. It started with Soap and Gaz. They walk closer to you, sit closer to you. When you join them in the evenings in the rec room they’ve started putting you between them. Price has now started getting closer, walking closer to you, standing closer to you, often looming behind you like a shadow. 
Ghost is the only one who hasn’t changed much, still regarding you with disinterest and speaking shortly to you when you’re forced to interact. 
“Don’t worry about ‘im lass. He'll warm up tae ye.” Soap had reassured you after a rather cold shoulder from Ghost. 
You’re not entirely sure that’s possible. You’re determined to at least try to get on amicable terms with him, and you’re hopeful the book will help with that. Even if he’s nothing more than just another alpha in your pack, if you can get him to stop being so icy around you, perhaps you’ll be able to settle in better. 
And maybe you’ll be able to fix your lack of instincts. 
Dr. Keller said there was nothing wrong with your lack of instincts at this point in the transition, but everything you had learned at The Institute goes against what she said. You’re an omega. Your job is to be obedient, to serve your pack, and follow your alpha’s commands. Good omegas do what’s asked of them without question, putting their trust in their alpha. No one knows what’s best for you like your alpha. 
Your alpha hasn’t asked much of anything of you. 
You don’t know how to feel about that. 
“I’m startin’ tae think that sandwich insulted ye, lass.” 
Soap’s voice pulls you from your thoughts. You have been sitting and staring at your sandwich for a while, lost in your thoughts. It’s not a terrible sandwich by any means, certainly better than the ones you got at The Institute. 
They’re all staring at you, four pairs of eyes watching you. You’ve barely touched your plate, and you hardly remember going through the line. 
You shake your head, picking up your fork to poke at whatever mushy vegetable Price had added to your tray. “No, it’s fine. I was just lost in thought.” 
“‘Bout what?” Soap asks, taking a bite of his own sandwich. 
You shrug. “Just something Dr. Keller said.” 
“Ah, omega secrets then.” Soap grins. “I’ve heard rumors that omegas know the true meaning of the universe.” 
“Yeah, it’s 42.” You say, earning a chuckle from Price. 
If you hadn’t been looking, you wouldn’t have noticed the shift in Ghost’s shoulders, the slight softening of his gaze for a moment as he stares at his own sandwich. 
He's laughing at you again. 
He’s an enigma, a confusing presence in your life. You have no choice but to have him in your life, just as he has no choice but to have you in his life. 
You finish your food quickly, wanting to get back to the book. You’ve already got some ideas floating around from it, things that might help you ease into their world a bit more. 
Gaz walks you back to the barracks after lunch, the area between the two buildings more crowded than usual. You both slow a bit as a whistle sounds through the air, your head turning as a rather crude comment reaches your ears. 
“Ignore them.” Gaz says, putting a hand on your back. “Bunch of cocksure alphas. They’re always rowdy after the weekend. They go out, surround themselves with omega barrack bunnies, make themselves feel important.” 
“Have you...been with a barrack bunny?” You ask hesitantly, mostly out of curiosity. You know they likely have. They've had their entire lives they've been able to dictate for themselves. 
“Not since joining the team.” He answers honestly. “None of us have. We don’t usually have the time, or the need. We have each other now.”
And now they have you.
“Do they, the other soldiers...do they know why I’m here?” You find yourself asking as you enter the barracks. 
“Not specifically.” Gaz says. “Most of what we do is classified, even to them. I think some of them have begun to put two and two together. And before too long, they’ll be able to figure it out.” He says, giving you a look as you stop in front of your door. 
“Yeah...” You say softly, your stomach churning nervously at the thought of your approaching heat. There’s still quite a bit of time before then, but you don’t feel ready. You don’t feel ready to spend a heat with an alpha, you don’t feel ready to be claimed. 
“Don’t worry too much.” He says, pressing his finger between your brows like he might be able to smooth out the frown that’s formed between them. “Price will take good care of you. Besides, we’ve got plenty of time to work out the kinks.” He chucks you under the chin gently before he leans down, pressing a kiss to your rapidly warming cheek. “I’ll see you later, yeah?” 
You still feel a bit like you’re floating as you close your door behind you. Your face is warm, not just from the forwardness of Gaz’s actions but also his words. You let out a quiet sound as you fan your face, trying desperately not to think about how soft his lips are, how easily he had ignited a fire within you with some words and a simple touch. 
Gaz is trouble, you think as you pull out the book again, settling down at your desk to read. 
You open the book, starting at the next section. 
Bonding With Your Pack. 
This is what you need, ideas on how to do exactly that. Even though you’re already beginning to feel close to Soap and Gaz, you still feel as if there’s a chasm keeping you from Price, and an ocean between you and Ghost. You just need something, anything that will start building that rope bridge and maybe a boat. 
Learn To Speak Their Language. 
You pause at the chapter title, pulling out the notebook you’ve been taking notes in. 
“As much as we want to think it can be, not everything can be about us all the time. Just like in any relationship, we have to put effort into others as well. If you find yourself struggling to connect with your alpha, the first step is to figure out something they’re interested in. Sports? Video Games? Food? Get to know your alpha, and make it a point to learn about something they’re interested in. Learn to speak their language.” 
You read the passage thrice over, the realization dawning on you. You knew from the beginning that getting them to adapt to you was not going to be possible. You were going to have to adapt yourself to fit into their lives. Their lives of fighting and war and violence and guns. 
An idea begins to form in your head as you brainstorm, scribbling page after page of notes. It’s not perfect, but you’re in no rush to perfect it. After all, you’ve got nothing but time.
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You sit next to Soap at breakfast, close enough his arm is brushing yours. You wish you could see Ghost’s face, or, well, his eyes at least. 
“So what do you guys do between breakfast and lunch?” You ask, all four of them pausing as they look at you. You continue to eat, pretending not to notice their looks. You know mornings are for their workouts before breakfast, but what they do between meals is almost entirely unknown to you. You assume it’s some sort of training, maybe meetings and briefings. 
“Training, usually.” Price answers after a moment. “Running simulations, training courses, weapons training, hand-to-hand. Keeps our skills sharp. Today they’re running a routine course to make sure they’re not getting lazy in our time off.” 
“Can I come?” You ask, their gazes snapping to you again. “To watch? I’m getting kind of bored sitting around.” 
Price’s gaze burns into you as you meet it, not looking away despite the tickling at the back of your neck telling you to yield. Tough alphas like a challenge, the book said. Don’t back down, even when you want to. 
“I don’t see why not.” He finally says, picking up his cup of coffee. “Give these muppets another reason to compete with each other.” 
The table erupts in chaos as Gaz and Soap immediately start betting with each other. You can’t help but smile, used to their bickering and competitiveness after spending time with them doing literally anything together. 
This is certainly going to be interesting, if nothing else. 
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“There’s two rules for you being here.” Price says as you walk with him down a line of hangars. “You do everything I say, and stick close to me. They’ll be using live rounds, and the last thing we need is you catching a stray bullet in some freak accident.” 
“Sir, yes, sir!” You say, saluting him. 
He stares down at you for a moment, amusement shining in his eyes. “Cute.” He leads you into the hangar, a sort of building made out of plywood set up inside. “Over here.” He leads you to where a sort of command center is set up. 
There’s screens showing feeds from cameras set up inside the mock building, a timer and an intercom system set up. You look it over in amazement, Price coming to stand next to you. 
“How does it work?” You ask. 
“They enter there.” He points to what you assume represents the front door. “Work their way through both levels to clear the house.There’s targets in some rooms that pop up when certain pressure triggers are hit on the floor. Hit every target, clear the house, exit there,” He points at a spot on the side of the house in front of where you’re standing. “And reach that red line in 60 seconds.” 
You blink in surprise. “How fast can they do it?” 
“Gaz holds the record currently at 19 seconds, Ghost in second at 19.5, and Soap at 20.5.” He says. 
“Wow.” You say under your breath, looking over the cameras again. “I’m not sure I could even think that fast.” 
Price chuckles. “I wouldn’t expect you to be able to, sweetheart. We’ve had years and years of training and experience. Stay here, I’ll be right back.” He says, heading back down the steps to where the others have gathered, wearing light gear. 
It’s not the first time you’ve seen them all geared up, but the change is always palpable. Gone are the laid back betas and alpha, and instead they’ve shifted into battle-hardened soldiers. It’s almost mesmerizing how easily they can shift between the two. 
And you can hardly handle your instincts getting a little twitchy. 
Price joins you again, turning on the intercom system. “Alright Gaz, at my go sweep the house and clear the rooms.” You hold your breath as Price pauses, Gaz in place at the front door. “Go, go, go!” Price says, the timer starting as Gaz enters the house. 
You watch on the cameras as he goes through the lower levels, jumping slightly as the first gunshots echo through the hangar. They’re louder than you had expected, even with the hangar doors opened partway. You feel a bit anxious as you watch the time and his progress, almost as if you’re watching an intense movie. 
17...18...19...
Gaz slips through the side door, racing for the red line marking the end. You stare at the timer as Price hits the stop button. Twenty one seconds. You wonder how often they don’t meet their previous records, or if their break really is having that much of an effect on them. You hear Gaz curse quietly as he passes, heading back to stand by Soap as Ghost gets ready at the start. 
The nervous anticipation doesn't lessen any as Ghost makes his way through the house, moving swiftly and silently as he always seemed to do. For such a large being he can move so quietly with an ease unlike you’ve ever seen. 
You watch the timer as he crosses the red line. 21.9. 
You catch a whiff of his scent as he passes, the hint of ozone burning your nose. He’s frustrated. They have to know they’re not performing as well as they know they can. Part of you wonders if it’s your fault they’re not even meeting their best times. 
Soap is up last, moving with an ease and focus that you’re not entirely surprised he’s capable of. Though he tends to be the most lighthearted of the four, and the most unserious, he made it on the team for a reason. 
Again you watch the timer, still held at rapt attention in the intensity of the moment as he crosses the red line. 25. He lets out a loud string of curses, most of which you don’t understand as he moves back to the start. 
“Wait here.” Price says before descending back down the steps. 
You’ve seen the change in him as well, a bit more subtle as he always seemed to be in the Captain mindset to some degree. You wonder if he’s ever not the Captain, if there’s a time where he gets to just be John Price. You wonder what he’s like when he doesn’t have the weight of his responsibility constantly on his shoulders. You wonder when the last time he got to let go like that was. 
“It’s my fault, isn’t it?” You say as he joins you once more. You’re beginning to think maybe you made a mistake in asking to come along. 
“Most likely.” He says, resetting the timer. “But that’s something we need to know. This is the new normal. They need to learn to work through it.” 
Especially if it’s you they’re trying to get to. 
You knew there was a risk. Just being associated with them puts you at risk. They’re hidden, anonymous, deeply classified for a reason. You’d gotten that briefing during your time training with the CIA, after Laswell had told you where you would be going. Just knowing their names, who they are, where their home base is, is enough to put you in danger. You were hidden just as much as they were now, your entire existence now hidden beneath layers of security clearance. 
You could still be a target, if anyone found out. They might think you have information, details about their missions, about the things they do. 
The likelihood of that happening was low, but never zero. There was still risk involved in being around them, a risk you were assigned to take. It was your duty, though, as an omega. Do what you’re told, go where you’re sent, follow your alpha without question. 
Institutes really are like the military, you think. Only you’re fighting a different battle than they are.
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You’re seated on the couch in your usual spot, curled up with a book. Your pack was having some downtime as Price had an emergency meeting he had to attend. Your heart had jumped a bit at the news, at the thought that they might be pulled away early. They weren’t supposed to get called off on a mission until after your next heat to allow for the adjustment and claiming, but if they were needed...they could be called away before then. 
So you’d settled in with a book in the rec room to try and calm your nervous energy. 
“Mind if I join ye?” 
You look up as Soap enters the rec room, a smile on his face. “No, go ahead.” You offer a smile back. 
He joins you on the couch, lifting your legs over his lap. You flush a bit at the bold move, but you were growing used to his boldness. “What are ye readin’?” 
“‘Lord of the Flies.’” You say, holding up the cover. 
“Did ye finish the other one already?” He asks in astonishment. 
“I’ve already read two books since I got here.” You say, laughing a little. 
“Och, yer a bright wee lamb, aren’t ye?” He chuckles. “Ye like tae read?” 
You nod. “Yeah. It’s good for passing the time.” 
He hums, grabbing the remote. “Ghost likes tae read too. Dinnae tell him I told ye that.” He holds up the remote. “Ye mind?” 
You shake your head. “No, go ahead.” 
He turns on the TV, keeping the volume low as he sits with you. His hand is warm where it rests on your calf, his thumb absentmindedly stroking circles over the fabric. You try to focus on the book but you can’t help the fluttering in your stomach at the proximity of the beta. You keep catching whiffs of his scent, and you’re beginning to feel an urge to ask him  about Ghost. If anyone can give you answers, it’ll be Soap. 
“Soap?” You ask, closing your book. 
He hums, turning to look at you. You stare into those bright blue eyes, your heart fluttering a bit. His eyes are so warm and expressive, shining with something you can’t quite put a name to. 
“Does Ghost...hate me?” You ask quietly, knowing with your luck as soon as you start the conversation, the man in question would appear out of nowhere. 
Soap’s lips tug up into a smile, a quiet chuckle rumbling through his chest. “Nae, lass. He doesnae hate ye. Ghost is...” He makes a face, trying to find the right words. “Ghost is very guarded.” 
He slips his arms around you, lifting you into his lap. You let out a quiet sound in surprise, wrapping an arm around his broad shoulders out of instinct. His arms wrap around you, his tactical vest digging into your side a bit, but you’re too focused on the sudden proximity to really care. 
“He's no an easy man tae get close tae.” He continues. “I know. Couldnae stand me when we first met. I broke him down, proved myself. We spent enough time together, and that bond just formed naturally.” 
“He sees me as a threat.” You say, voicing the opinion you’ve been coming to over the last few days. 
“I wouldnae say a threat.” Soap grins, his hand squeezing your side. “A wee yin like ye. He just needs time tae adjust. He's gonnae dae it in his own way.” 
“I don’t even need him to really like me.” You say, tracing the Union Jack on the front of Soap’s vest. “I just need him to tolerate me.” 
“This is him tolerating ye.” Soap deadpans. 
You give him a look. “Well he’s got a funny way of showing it then.” 
Soap chuckles, the sound vibrating through your body. “Nah, dinnae worry too much about him, hen.” 
You hum, leaning your head on his shoulder. “You’re right. It’s Captain Price I need to worry about.” 
“I dinnae think ye need tae worry too much there either.” Soap grins. “The Cap’n is head over heels for ye already.” 
You give him a look of disbelief, eyebrows raising. “What?” 
Soap nods. “Oh aye, I havenae seen him smile this much in all the time I’ve known him.” 
You continue to stare in disbelief. You knew Price at least tolerated the idea of you becoming his omega. He’s been nothing but polite, cordial even with you. In the traditional sense he’s already begun courting you, providing and protecting. You still have yet to move beyond the polite tiptoeing, even with how things have been shifting the last few days.
You have the beta’s approval, which you know is an important step in pack formation. 
You bite your lip, your fingers curling around the edge of his vest. “You really think he...” 
“Mhm.” Soap nods. “Cannae blame him, pretty omega like ye strutting around the base.” 
He’s getting closer to you. You can’t do anything but stay still as his face lowers towards yours. Your stomach is fluttering, but you can’t tell if it’s nerves or excitement. His hand slides down your side, following the curve of your hip before it settles on your thigh. He’s so warm, his scent amplified with your close proximity. You feel a bit dizzy, your head spinning a bit. You understand now how betas can still win over both alphas and omegas. 
“We all feel lucky havin’ ye.” He says quietly, his breath fanning your face. His forehead presses against yours, so close to you your noses are brushing.
You wonder what Ghost would do if he walked in and saw you this close to his beta. Would your body fly through a window or a wall? Or would he tackle you, wrap his hands around your throat and squeeze until your head pops or your airway collapses? Or, was Soap right and he would do nothing? 
Or would he like it? 
The thought sends a shiver down your spine. Soap likes you, both of the betas in your new pack like you. It’s good, you know, having the approval of both betas, even though you don’t technically need both. Price could claim you with only his and Gaz’s approval, though it would be easier if all four approved. 
You wonder if Ghosts supposed tolerance of you is because of Soap. The alpha is very protective of his beta, though you don’t doubt Soap would go to bat for you if he needed to. 
He might have already. 
Soap hasn’t moved, both of you frozen where you are. He wants to kiss you, you think, your brain pulling up all the movies you’ve seen in your life. You’re gripping onto him tightly, your stomach fluttering. You’re nervous, unsure of how to move next. Do you let him kiss you? You’ve only been kissed once before, but that was hardly more than a childish peck on the lips. He wants to kiss you like they do in the movies. 
Will Soap be upset if you pull away? Will he force you back and take what he wants? There would be no stopping him. Even if the others were in the building, even if they heard you, would they come to your rescue? Or would they let it happen because it’s your purpose? What would Ghost do if he walked in and saw you? What would Price do? Would Price be upset that he wasn’t the first to kiss you? 
You are his claim after all. 
You slowly draw yourself back, removing your arm from around his shoulders as you turn slightly to face the TV. You hold your breath, not wanting to catch the souring of Soap’s scent, the tell that he was upset at your decision. You wait for his grip to tighten, for his body to force you back onto the couch. His hand moves from your thigh and you tense, waiting for the reprimanding to come, but instead he simply wraps his arms around your upper body again, holding you like he had been before. 
Your heart is still thudding in your chest as you quietly watch the TV, the silence in the room thick but not uncomfortable. You lean your head back on his shoulder, letting yourself relax into him. The almondy scent of beta is thick in the air, likely his doing to diffuse the tension he must be able to feel. 
“British TV is weird.” You say, trying to follow along with what’s going on, on the screen. 
Soap laughs, squeezing his arms around you for a moment. “Aye, it really is.” 
You continue to sit with him, letting his scent relax you. You’ve given up following what’s on the TV, his warmth and presence slowly lulling you until your eyes are drifting closed. 
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The scent permeates the air everywhere he goes. 
Caramel. Vanilla. Strawberries. 
No amount of scent blockers can keep it from seeping under his mask, permeating his senses. He’d spray the scent blocker up his nose if he thought it might work. You’re stinking up the base, his beta, his life. Even now he can smell it, the sweet cloud of your scent wafting through the halls. 
He can pick up the sharp tang of anxiety on the edge of it, a low growl rumbling through his chest in response. It burns his nose and he hates it. His boots are quiet on the tile floor as he makes for the rec room, following the cocktail of scents. Your pungent sweetness layered over Johnny’s warm spice. 
Images flash through his mind of what position he might find you both in. He can smell the musky undertones of Johnny’s desire in the air, a scent he’s very familiar with. He knows how much his beta wants the new omega that’s been forced on them. They don’t need an omega. He knows how much Price fought against it, but even the Captain has begun to fall under your intoxicating spell. 
You don’t even know you’re doing it. 
His hands curl into fists as he steps into the rec room. The TV is playing some daytime rerun, but his eyes are drawn to the couch. Johnny is fast asleep, his head leaning against yours. You’re asleep in his lap, hand under your cheek, resting against his chest. You’ll have imprints on your skin from your hand and his vest. Johnny’s arms are wrapped tight around you, looking more peaceful than he has in a while. 
He’s already comfortable enough to sleep with you. 
“MacTavish!” He snaps, startling both of you. 
The only thing that keeps you from flailing to the floor is Johnny’s quick reflexes, his grip tightening around you to keep you on his lap. Johnny blinks the sleep from his eyes, squinting up at him for a moment. 
“Let’s move.” He growls, turning and leaving the rec room. 
He refuses to look at you in your sleepy haze, not quite as quick to wake as Johnny. He doesn’t want to watch the way Johnny eases you to your feet, how small you look leaning against him as you grumble sleepily. He doesn’t want to watch as Johnny guides you to your door, easing you into the safety of your room while they leave to do their jobs. 
He hates the way he turns back to look as Johnny speaks quietly to you, those big, shiny puppy eyes staring up at him. He hates the churning in his stomach as you soften at Johnny’s kiss to your forehead, the way you watch Johnny walk down the hallway. Ghost opens the door for his beta, letting him out, but he can’t bring himself to move until he hears the click of the lock on your door sliding into place. 
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fromgoy2joy · 7 days
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Let's write about Jewish characters in dynamic ways- that make it clear "Yes this is us. Yes, we are living our lives with this happiness and ritual, and we love it. "
Like it's so easy to write about, to have casual observances of Judaism and cultural practices be in the background of stories. I'll write of the few examples I can think of in my frame of reference as a college student-
there's a mezuza in the doorway of a college kid's apartment. Whenever his friends come over, it's a reach for some of them to touch it because both he and the rabbi who installed it are 6 foot three. The others feel like a middle school boy slapping the ceiling as they try and reach for the damn thing.
Characters rush on public transport to get to a rabbi's house on shabbat. The train is due. There's a flurry of regrouping, then trying to call a missing friend to get there, and then the process of methodically hiding Magen davids and jewish objects because getting to shabbat dinner without a situation was an order from college Hillel staff.
A character is half-drunk at 2 AM at the convenience store but has to scan the list of ingredients on their chemically disgusting snack for gelatin.
Said character is prevented by her friends from only sustaining herself on 7/11 slushees "even though it's all kosher!"
There are references to the Purim incident constantly- it is never clarified what happened on Purim.
the hypothetical gang of characters are in the middle of nowhere on a grand magical adventure. The main character notices a mezuza on a door of a cabin, knocks on it, and has an in-depth conversation with the resident. Then, he waves his friends over. "Hey, guys! We have a place to stay tonight!" Because through the magic of Jewish geography, it was discovered that the grumpy old Jewish man in the woods is the grand uncle of one of his Jewish Day school teachers
A character who eats cheesy bacon bagels regularly on passover has a deep respect for jewish ritual items. He kisses the siddurim as they're handed back into a pile, he always kisses his kippah that he wears for ritual purposes of shabbats and minions. He's very careful with these objects and keeps on claiming dropping something He is observant, and he cares so much, but not in the "typical" way. Just... please show the nuance in practice.
The big "going out night" for our fearless college student isn't Friday but saturday night because of shabbat.
The stain on the rabbi's couch is not to be mentioned
A character keeps on mentioning the stain anyway.
Jewish goodbyes after any event take a minimum of two hours and that's why the gang is delayed on their journey to save the world .
I want more representation than characters in novels saying "haha I'm jewish but eat bacon and love Christmas!" in such flat ways. Please feel free to add more hypothetical ways of representation in the comments !!! About or inspired by your own life and experiences ! Let's make this post vibrant!
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lnfours · 2 months
Note
i keep thinking of a second chance romance with lando, f.e. being young and having made stupid decisions when his career was just taking off, and then after a few years kind of wishing to get it all back🤔
i am: sobbing. i love second chance romances. also i got carried away… again…
lando brainrot? lando brainrot.
max fewtrell was the definition of a social butterfly. and if lando didn’t know that already, he sure did now. looking around at the crowd, he was almost sure his friend was more popular than him. he didn’t even know max knew this many people.
the music inside the house was loud, lando swore he could feel the bass in his heart. max had left him a while ago, the rest of the quadrant team off to god knows where. he stood in the kitchen, grabbing a drink and escaping from the crowd in the other room. he scanned the area as he tried his best to find someone to strike up a conversation with so he didn’t look like a total loser while his best friend made his rounds to different people.
that’s when he caught the first glimpse of you, making him do a double take as he looked back to where he thought he saw you. and sure enough, it was. you were here. in london. in the flesh. after all this time, you had come back.
his feet were moving before his brain could process what he was doing, mumbling soft ‘excuse me’s as he tried his hardest to reach you. luckily, ethan had found you and managed to keep you in a spot where he could join in on the conversation.
“that’s great, ethan!” you smiled, “congratulations!”
“thanks,” he smiled before lando caught his eye, “mate, look who’s here!”
you turned around to look at who ethan was talking to behind you, only to be met with those familiar green eyes and brown curls. you felt your heart squeeze in your chest, and all of a sudden you were brought back to when you were nineteen and madly in love.
scratch that, the only time you ever considered yourself to be in love.
you and lando weren’t necessarily on bad terms, the both of you had just drifted away. you had been through every thing together, attached to the hip since you were children. and the breakup was hard, sure, but with you moving to the states and his career taking off, neither of you had much time to think about it. you didn’t let yourself think about it.
“hey,” he said, coming to stand with the two of you now, “you’re… here?”
you smiled softly at the brit in front of you, “i wasn’t going to miss max’s engagement party.”
ethan had disappeared from the two of you, finding his way back to niran and aarav. it was just the two of you.
“yeah,” lando smiled softly, “uhm, how’s the states?”
“fine,” you shrugged, “no place like home, though.”
“you’re just back for the party?”
you hummed, taking a sip of your drink, “actually, they asked if i wanted to be a project leader for something they’re working on in the office over here, so i’m back in london for right now.”
he raised his eyebrows, “oh, that’s awesome, congratulations.”
you smiled, “thanks,” you couldn’t help it, your eyes taking him in. he looked good. so good. of course you still kept tabs on him, still watched the races when you had the chance to do so. but something about seeing him again after all this time, in the flesh and not on your tv screen, your heart was yearning, “saw your podium last week, mega drive.”
he shrugged, “it was alright, i guess.”
“don’t tell me you still do that.”
he laughed softly, “do what?”
“your thing!” you chuckled, “you do that thing where, no matter how good of a drive you have, you’re like ‘eh, could be better’.”
“well, it could be,” he said, “could’ve been me on the first place spot.”
“you’ll get there one day.”
he smiled softly at you before looking around the crowd. he spotted the door to that lead to the back deck that looked vacant, “did you want to step outside? get some air.”
you nodded and he offered you his hand. you took it gently, letting him lead you through the crowd of people before you reached the back door. he opened it, letting you step outside first. the cool summer breeze was a relief, the escaping from the loud music and an overwhelming amount of people.
“forgot why i loved this place so much,” you said, looking up at the night sky as he closed the door behind him, “you can see the stars here. can’t see much in new york.”
he hummed, stepping behind you, “might as well take in as much as the night sky you can get.”
“believe me, i am,” you chuckled softly, turning around to face him. the moonlight dimly lit his face as he stood in front of you, and you could finally see the start of a little bit of facial hair on his chin. you smiled teasingly, pointing at it, “i see you can finally grow facial hair,”
he rolled his eyes, “yeah and if i remember correctly, you said you were into guys with no facial hair.”
you twisted your lips in though, “still true.”
“damn,” he mumbled, bringing his hand up to his face, “guess i’ll have to go get a new razor tomorrow.”
you laughed, the two of you taking a seat on the steps of the porch. you looked back up at the sky, trying hard to ignore the way your heart was hammering in your chest. trying so hard that your brain couldn’t filter the next words out of your mouth.
“what ever happened with us?”
he looked over at you now, taking in your side profile before you looked over at him, “what do you mean?”
“do you ever think about us?” you asked, “like where we would be right now if we hadn’t gone and fucked it all.”
he licked his lips, “yeah, all the time.”
“me too.”
“this would probably be our engagement party,” he joked and you smiled, “can’t believe max beat us to it.”
“tell me about it,” you sighed, “i just had to give blake twenty bucks.”
he laughed softly, “no, but, seriously. i’m happy you’re here. i missed you.”
you swallowed, looking back into his eyes, “you missed me?”
“who wouldn’t?” he said, “even when we ended things and you moved and then i moved, i couldn’t help but feel like my life was missing something. like i was missing a piece to the puzzle, and… it was you.”
you were silent for a moment, processing everything that he had said before he cut your thinking process off, “i’m sorry, i didn’t-“
“lan,” you said, placing your hand on his, his rambling pausing as he mouth closed, “i feel the same. i was miserable in new york. i kept feeling like i had left something behind, like i abandoned it. and really, i had abandoned you.”
“you didn’t abandon me.”
“no, but it felt like it,” you said, “our whole lives it’s always been us against the world. and the last couple years it’s felt like its been the whole world against me. letting us go was one of the worst mistakes i ever made.”
“me too,” he said, reaching up and brushing away a strand of hair that had fallen into your face, “i’m still madly in love with you. i don’t think i ever stopped being in love with you.”
“me either.” your voice was softer now, realizing how close he was and taking in all the things you loved about him. his dimples, the way the freckles and moles decorated his face. he was still yours. he always had been.
he leaned forward, nose brushing against yours. you smiled softly, letting him cup your face into his hand. something he always did that would turn you to putty in his hands. even now.
“can i take you out for breakfast tomorrow?”
you nodded, biting down on your lower lip to suppress the grin on your face, which was ultimately failing, “i’d love that.”
he finally pressed his lips to yours, you melting into him. he pulled you as close as he could get you, deepening the kiss as he tilted his head to the side.
“hey, lando! shit, sorry-“
you two broke apart at the sound of max’s voice, who had already turned around and walked away from the two of you. lando laughed softly, letting your head dip down onto his chest.
“well, now we don’t have to worry about telling him.”
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bahrtofane · 2 months
Text
soapy oh soapy
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jude looses his lucky charm and looses his mind in the process
word count - 1.5K+
watch it - HAPPY ARPIL FOOLS. the most unserious fic to date ( jk theres one more coming )
p.s. -big shout out to my friends @aloejuicebr for fueling this madness u guys are real ones and even bigger shout to plooki @yayam26 for making soapy missing poster
-----
You end up forcing jude to do skin care with you after begging him for weeks because you just know you can work your magic and make him feel the best he’s ever felt. All you need is a night in. And time. Lots of time 
After some persuasion and begging, pouty lips and puppy eyes, he gives in. 
“Fine.” is all he says while you’re in his living room, legs over his watching a movie that you've long ignored in favor of bothering him. 
But you’re already giggling. Picking out a headband you want him to wear in your head. Pink care bear one it is. The night comes on a rainy day, he has a rare day off the next morning, so you want him to start it on a good note. 
You’re getting ready for bed, in your pjs, jumping about while you get your little baggie full of goodies out. 
“Here,” you hand him the headband,” put this on” pink care bear one just like you envisioned. 
He takes it, feeling the soft material while he hums, “what’s this for?”
“Keeps things out of your hair.” you smile, dragging him to his bathroom. You take about a hundred pictures, and he poses for you for each one. Giggling while you coach him into poses. You think you'll send a few to Jobe for good measure. 
You face the sink and think of a game plan. Eyeing the counter  
It’s here you first lay eyes on soapy. 
“Jude what the hell is that? "You grimace, looking at what looks like a dry stump of white something, sitting on its own little ceramic dish. 
Jude looks away, scratching the back of his neck, mumbling something under his breath. 
You swing your little kit on the sink counter, setting a hand on your hip,”what was that?” 
He sighs dramatically, putting his face in his hands,”it’s my good luck charm. soapy,” he wails. 
You snort, patting his back, “I'm sure he’s very uh lucky,” you give it a small pat. 
“No he is,” Jude brings his head up to face you, “ I know it. I've had him since before dortmund. “ he nods proudly. 
You grimace,”you’ve had a piece of soap for years?”
He only nods harder. 
“Okay jude. Whatever you say. “ 
“I am not getting rid of him,” he points a finger in your face. One that you gently move, pulling his hand into your own. 
“I didn't say get rid of him. Let’s get your skincare started, yeah?”
He nods, following you through the steps like a lost puppy. leaning down while you help him apply the creams and foams just right 
When it’s all set and done, he wiggles into bed happy as can be. Sighing deeply, “that was actually really nice. Thank you. “ 
peck! right on your nose. 
you laugh, “told you it would be nice. “ 
your next plan is to find a way to deal with soapy…
——-
Jude loses soapy. It becomes a whole fiasco. He can’t find him in the usual small little pocket in his duffel bag in the usual ziplock baggie. 
He’s frantic at his hotel, tearing his things apart, looking and relooking at the bottom of his suitcase. His jacket pockets, his pants pockets. 
He tries to think. Did he leave him in his bathroom? No. Can't be it. He remembers putting him inside the familiar zip lock baggie while getting the rest of his things ready. Where in the world did he go. 
His soapy. His poor soapy! How is he supposed to live in these conditions. He’s never. ever missed a single game without soapy. What is he supposed to do now? Loose?? There goes his good luck down the drain. Years of good performance is about to take a nosedive. 
When he’s set to do his routine face time with you pre game, you pick up on his sour mood. But he only brushes it off, blaming it on pre game nerves 
You don’t believe him, but don’t want to press
Jude pends 20 minutes locked inside the bathroom, head in his hands while he scolds himself. It’s a bar of soap he wants to scream, pull yourself together. But he can’t. Soapy has become more than just a silly little joke. He’s become attached to soapy, a part of his routine. He’d rather die than admit it out loud to anyone 
For now he sighs, smoothing his jersey down and getting ready to get on the pitch. 
——-
The only thing that’s been in his mind is getting back home and getting to the bottom of the mystery. Unfortunately for him, soapy is nowhere to be found in the bathroom. Not in the living room. The kitchen. The hallway. He thinks of hiring a cleaning team, but what is he supposed to say ? 
Oh hey guys clean my house and also be on the lookout for a dried out stick of white that looks like a finger haha. 
No. Absolutely not. 
He takes to his own devices and begins to tear apart his house in a desperate search for his beloved soapy. He spends the whole day on his hands and knees looking under places he didn’t even know his house had to begin with, squeezing under and into spaces he’s sure gonna regret tomorrow. 
It’s already dark out when he calls it quits. Nothing but a few bruises to show for it. 
He’s really lost him huh. 
——-
His behavior is soon picked up by teammates, coaches and staff. The usual cheery youthful Jude is replaced by a damp sluggish cranky one.
He’s silent at training, chewing the inside of his cheek while going through the familiar motions of each drill. 
Eduardo comes to him after they hit the showers, squeaky clean and ready to go home. 
“You good?”
Jude gives him a bashful nod, “yeah man. just a little worn out, don't worry.”
He gets a clap on the shoulder in response, and gives a tight lipped smile back. He’s gotta figure this out or it will start to affect more than just his mood. How stupid of him to let an old slice of a soap bar affect him so much. 
A little piece of him can guess why. Soapy is one of the very few stable things in his life. And perhaps the only stable physical thing. something to count on. Something to be able to rely on. Unchanging. 
But now that he’s gone and lost it ? jeez. 
——-
You show up to his house on a cloudy day, his favorite snacks under your arm. He greets you with a kiss, but you see the way his eyes droop and sag. What's wrong with your golden boy? 
He leads you to the living room where you make yourself at home. Plopping down on the couch and handing him his things. 
He takes them gingerly, setting them on the kitchen counter while he takes a seat across from you 
you frown, “Jude. What's wrong? “
He looks away, playing with his hands, knee bouncing. Okay what is going on that’s gotten him so worked up
“Baby…” you try, scooting closer to him. 
He screws his eyes shut, bawling his hands into fists, “I lost soapy,” 
oh. 
Your gaze softens, “You lost him? When?”
He sighs, cracking an eye open, when he sees you aren’t making fun of him he opens both, relaxing. 
“I don't know. when we played villareal away I couldn’t find him. Then i got back and tore this place up and still no luck.” arms falling into his lap. 
You place a hand on his knee. Gentle. Soft. 
“He couldn't have gotten far. I'm sure he’s somewhere obvious. “ 
“I guess,” he mumbles, leaning into your touch. 
You smile, letting him lean against you. He's so cute when he pouts. You like babying him anyway. The rest of the day is spent with his head in your lap while you press occasional kisses to his face, letting keeping up with the kardashians play in the background. 
When it’s time for you to leave, Jude whines, pouting and asking you to stay just a little more.
“It's already late jude, I would if I could you know that. “
He huffs, “I guess. “ 
You forgot about your bags laying on the kitchen counter, might as well put them away before you go. 
Jude gets up to help, sliding against the hardwood and meeting you in the kitchen
He grabs a chair from the island in the middle, bringing it to him and a little baggie falls from it. Is that what he thinks it is ? He picks it up faster than you can turn around and almost screams. He could cry tears of joy 
It’s soapy. 
You were right. It was right in front of him all along 
He holds up the bar for you to see and you smile, “see. told you. “
He nods, “yes you did,” kissing your lips as a thank you 
You hum, patting his head when you pull apart, “glad you found soapy.” 
Maybe soapy isn’t so bad after all. 
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dawnoftime22 · 3 months
Text
thief.
| N.R
Warnings: None
Summary: When you go about making your meal for breakfast, it had mysteriously disappeared, leading to an obvious suspect of a redhead.
Word Count: 784
Category: fluff<3
A/N: I've missed writing fluff very very much and this was for @ncsdlr, inspired by their post of nat so here's a cute short little fic about it :]
| Started on 06/03/2024, 5:53 AM |
| Finished on 06/03/2024, 8:58 AM |
Main Masterlist | N.R Masterlist
“What's yours is mine, is it not?"
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|——————————— ⴵ ———————————|
You stood in the kitchen, making a delicious sandwich for breakfast and maybe even to enjoy later after training if you don't finish.
At the moment, you were alone up until Thor walks in, going off to the pantry cabinet, assumingly looking for a poptart or cereal for his morning breakfast.
You turn from your plate of sandwich, walking to the fridge and opening it to grab some water. But when you close it and go back to take a bite of your food, it had disappeared, only a few crumbs of the bread and the sauce you put a trace of evidence of your sandwich that once existed right there.
"What the...Where did my sandwich go?" Your voice was full of confusion and shock as you blink, staring at it. Then, you look around, and notice Thor first, standing in the kitchen with you.
"Thor," you say, your expression deadpanned, and he pops his head out from behind the cabinet door, his mouth open in the way you called his name. He hadn't done anything, and even just by the tone of your voice, he knew you were accusing him of something.
Then he notices your empty plate that had a delicious looking sandwich he once saw when he walked in. You couldn't have finished it in seconds. That's when he figured out why you looked a little ticked.
"I did no such thing! I have been standing right here, and my hands are empty." He gestured with his hands, his face in utter disbelief. Your eyebrows furrow further in thought.
"Who is it then?" You raised your hands, your eyes still focused on him. He grabs a box of pop tarts out from the cabinet, opening it to slide a packet out. He looks up at you before going to the microwave, but he stops in his tracks.
"Just make...another one." He pauses in between his words as he notices a redhead passing by, holding an oddly similar sandwich to yours, chewing carelessly. He was too afraid to point it out, knowing the assassin might just kill him if he does.
But you see his eyes following something behind you rather than looking directly at you, so you slowly turn to look at who was there.
A small gasp escapes you. Natasha, stood right beside your empty plate, having come from nowhere. She was staring right at you, holding the exact sandwich you had just made minutes ago, that had disappeared.
"Thief," you exclaim, walking closer to the kitchen island where she's at and putting your hand on it, holding yourself against it. She swallows before speaking up.
"It's not stealing if you left it there," she shrugs, the sandwich moving along with her hand, and you had to process her words for a moment until you let out a small laugh.
"That's the same thing." You tilt your head slightly as you said it, her sentence making no sense. If it was anyone else, you might have already chased them around the room already to retrieve your sandwich.
"Why didn't you just make one yourself?" Thor had left the kitchen by now, enjoying his pop tart by himself while you and Nat continued your playful conversation.
"It's not the same," she says, and at that, you shake your head. Her face was calm, but her eyes held a hint of teasing.
"Well, then, you could have just asked," you mumble. Nat stays quiet, studying your face. She could have just asked, but she also loved poking at you for fun.
"Now I need to make another one." You complained as you pick up your plate, about to go grab the loaf of bread once again while your stomach complained at the late breakfast.
"You can have it back." She holds out the sandwich to you, even though it was clear she had already eaten more than you thought she had.
"No, you've already had a bite of it, keep it." Or more so, multiple bites. You wave your free hand that wasn't holding the plate dismissively, not minding since it was well...Nat, but you were a tinge upset.
She sees the adorable pout your face held, and a small smile tugs at the corners of her lips.
"I'll make one for you, how's that?" Nat stands up from the barstool standing tall for the kitchen island, moving to the counters to grab the ingredients. When she turns her head to look over her shoulder, she takes your smile as an acceptance.
Later on, the two of you enjoyed your sandwiches that you had, one being 'accidentally' made for the other, and one being especially made for the other.
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Text
Happy Birthday
Just a really self-indulgent fic for my bday. And yes I am going to spend my entire birthday on bg3 trying to romance this fictional vampire.
Summary: Astarion struggles to come up with a gift for you birthday.
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Astarion knew your birthday was coming up, but he didn’t know what to get you. What did you want that you already didn’t have? You already seemed rather content with whatever you had, and you barely glanced at trinkets in the markets, content with whatever loot you found during the journey. He was at quite the loss for in the romance books he had read, flowers, jewellery, perfume had been the typical gifts given and yet you had never quite been inclined towards such things.
“Astarion? Is something wrong?”
He blinks, startled and realises that you’re standing right in front of him.
“Oh, it’s nothing darling, don’t you worry,” he smiles, gently cupping your cheek. He presses a kiss to your forehead, thumb gliding over your skin. You frown but don’t press the matter further. If he was comfortable with telling you about it, he would share it with you. You weren’t going to make him uncomfortable by forcing him to tell you what was on his mind.
“Just…know that you can tell me anything, alright?” You ask worriedly, giving his hand a squeeze. He nods, lifting your hand to his lips and presses a kiss to your knuckles. You smile, pulling him in for a hug and he nuzzles you in return, happy about the small act of love.
“I’ll see you later tonight,” you lean in for a kiss on the lips before quickly pulling away to head off with Wyll to scout the area ahead. He watches you go, an imprint of your warmth lingering on his skin and heads back inside his tent, trying to ignore the way his undead heart pounds against his chest, words stuck in his throat.
He spends the next few days wracking his brain on what to get you for your birthday while taking out his frustrations on the poor goblins the party encountered along the way until one day, he found something that had caught your attention. Of all things, it had to be some mediocre cloak.
“What’s so interesting about that…thing?” Astarion frowns. “I could purchase a cloak made with far better quality elsewhere.”
“But it’s handmade! It’s a product of someone’s hard work, time, effort and heart! How could you not appreciate it!” You huff, handing over the gold to the grateful merchant and hug the cloak close to your chest, smiling brightly. Astarion rolls his eyes and pulls you along before you can spend more gold on ‘mediocre items’, but this encounter has given him an idea of what to gift you for your birthday.
The moment the two of you reach camp, he slips into his tent and sneaks out the sewing kit he has stashed away in the deepest depths. A number of items he can sew for you run through his mind, but the one thing that nags away at his mind is a scarf. It has not escaped his notice how you often shiver on chilly nights, brushing it off whenever Karlach confronts you about it. He never misses how you jump whenever he touches your bare skin on such nights before giving him a reassuring smile and leaning into the touch despite the chill.
So he begins sewing a scarf, weaving it together with fabrics of your favourite colours whenever the party decides to set up camp for the night.
You raise an eyebrow when Astarion hastily disappears into his tent without even saying a word to you for the third night in a row, wondering what is going on. The first two nights you let the issue slide, thinking that he just needed some space to process whatever was going on in his head, but this was the third night and it was getting worrying.
Making your way to his tent, you pause outside the flap, wondering if by doing this you’re intruding on his privacy but decide you’d rather risk getting yelled at for sticking your nose into his business than let his potentially dark thoughts consume him.
“Astarion? I’m coming in!” You call before lifting up the tent flap, hearing a small commotion as you step in but are only greeted with the sight of Astarion holding a book, sitting on his bedroll with a smile.
“Hello, dearest.” He’s sitting rather stiffly for someone who ‘has been reading for the past however long’, stirring suspicion within you but you pretend that you haven’t noticed anything, hoping that you can coax whatever it was out of him.
“You haven’t been feeding lately.” You start off with a simple comment to lower his guard.
“There are plenty of bears around these woods, darling, don’t you worry.”
“I thought you said bear blood isn’t as tasty as mine?”
“You have been rather busy as of late, darling. I didn’t want to tire you further.”
“You’re the one who has been rather busy as of late, disappearing into your tent immediately after we set up camp.” You point out, arms folded across your chest. “Is there something that’s bothering you?”
“No?” He blinks, “I’ve just been rather engrossed in this book as of late.”
“So engrossed that you can’t even set aside some time to spend with me?”
Oh. He screwed up.
“I didn’t mean to —”
“Am I really less interesting than a book?”
“Of course not!” Astarion shifts anxiously. Was he going to lose whatever was going on between the both of you? He hadn’t thought about how his fixation on getting that scarf sewn on time for your birthday would affect you, the message his actions would send you, and how…all he wanted was to make you happy.
Your gaze softens and you apologise for being so harsh with him, which he automatically brushes off with a fake smile and a laugh, saying that it was alright but you could tell you had set something off in the deep recesses of his mind.
“Astarion.” You say gently.
“Yes darling?”
“Please tell me if I’ve hurt you. I never intend to, but I need to know if I have so that I won’t repeat it again,” you plead, worry gnawing at your insides. What if his guard was back up, leaving him alone with his own mind that tore him apart? What if he was pushing you away, you couldn’t imagine a life without him in every facet of it. What if he had grown tired of you, or worse, afraid of you? You didn’t want to lose the bond so painstakingly forged and greatly cherished, the very thought that he would leave scared you far more than anything in the world.
“It’s not that!” He quickly stands to his feet, swiftly closing the distance and wraps his arms around you tightly. “It’s…nothing, I promise. Don’t leave me.”
He whispers the last part but you catch it anyways. Burying your face into his chest, you wrap your arms around him as well, breathing in his scent.
“I won’t ever leave you, you’re my star, I’m lost without you.”
His eyes widen for a fraction of a second and a wide smile graces his face, a smile you cannot see and he doesn’t want you to see. A giddy feeling bubbles within his chest, he had never thought he would ever find anyone who would love him, and yet here he was, standing in the arms of someone who considered him their everything.
“Thank you,” he murmurs, the half-sewn scarf left forgotten. He would much rather spend the rest of the night with you, in your embrace and so he does, happily purring away when you massage his scalp and pressing as many kisses as he possibly can to your face.
Your worries are washed away when you see him relax like this, slipping into a trance whilst he’s curled up against you. Maybe you were worried about nothing after all. You run your fingers through his soft silvery curls, humming a lullaby you remember from your childhood as you feel sleep claim you and you drift off soon after, burning the image of a trancing Astarion into your mind.
You and Astarion fall into a routine in the following days where he would spend the first half of the night alone in his tent, doing whatever secret private thing he was doing and then he would move over to your tent for the remainder of the night, spending it either cuddling or reading with you. It was an agreement the both of you were satisfied with, and the whole party was relieved that the tension had faded. Bit by bit Astarion inched closer towards a finished scarf, and the night before your birthday, he finally had the complete product.
“Finally!” He groaned, collapsing onto his bedroll. It wasn’t the best scarf he’d ever seen, but it was decent enough, at least for his standards. Then the doubt started creeping in. Would you like it? Would you wear it? What if all the effort he had put into making the scarf was for naught? But then he remembers how until now, you’ve been wearing that mediocre cloak you had bought because it was handmade and it reassures him a little. He wouldn’t know how you felt about his scarf until he gifted it to you.
When the sun rose on your big day, Astarion waited until the others had said their well wishes and given you their gifts before approaching you.
“Y/N.” He says.
“Yes, Star?” You tilt your head in confusion. He rarely called you by your name, and when he did it was usually a serious matter.
“Happy birthday,” he says quickly, embarrassed as he thrusts a neatly wrapped package into your arms.
You beam, eagerly tearing it open and gasp when you see what lies inside.
“A scarf! I’ve been meaning to get one!” You cheer. “Thank you, Star! Really!”
His heart warms at your words, his lips curling up slightly as he watches you struggle to put it on.
“Would you like some help with that, my love?” He reaches over anyways, untangling you from the fabric and expertly wraps it around your neck before finishing it with a peck to your fore head. “There, done.”
You happily twirl around, playing with the ends of your scarf and giggle, throwing yourself at the vampire.
“Thank you so much!”
“Anytime, love.”
“Where did you buy this from?” You ask, happily burying your face into the soft fabric.
“I…I made it myself,” he mumbles, twiddling his fingers.
“You did? It must have taken so long to make this! That makes it even more precious!” You hug him tightly.
“I’m glad you like it,” he kisses the top of your head, all worry long washed away.
“Of couse I do. Anything you give me, I like it.” You grin up at him. “Now, can we spend the rest of the day together?”
“I would like nothing more, my love.”
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ktzuki · 2 months
Text
sit on me;
izuku x reader, university au
✎ synopsis — there were no more seats, so izuku offered you a seat. on his lap 🤞(only BORDERLINE suggestive)
✎ a/n — bnha fandom i am here again but for my manz izuku. he is just so.... arrggghhh i love older izu aus hes everything to me
"yn, the movies starting!!" ochako screamed. your uni flatmates decided to host a movie night, and with all the stress from finals... it was really something you appreciated.
"on my way! blame kirishima for wanting so many snacks!" you retort, scurrying to the living room where everyone else was.
what bad luck you had. normally the couch was able to hold the lot of you, but jirou had invited her boyfriend, kaminari, to the party. and for the first time, you had the courage to invite your literature classmate, and crush, izuku midoriya.
"theres no more seats..." you mumbled from the kitchen doorway. you werent sure what to do, since this was a problem that never came up. you didnt want to kick anyone off, or disturb anyone since everyone looked comfortable. you also felt a bit down as you missed your chance to sit next to izuku. you knew the others would take a hint, but you never told any of them about your feelings. in the midst of your overthinking, you hadnt noticed the slight turn of izukus head towards your direction. he watched you for a bit as you couldnt come to a solution.
"you can sit on me if you want."
the room fell into silence at izukus statement, jaws dropping in the process. you werent sure if you heard that correctly, nor did anyone else for that matter, as the boy never usually had that kind of confidence — that was something youd expect from kaminari, or bakugo with his girlfriend (a sight youd never expect to see).
"woah, izuku... who knew you were so manly!" kirishima broke the silence, smacking izukus back in the process.
"yeah... woah...!!" "okay puller!!" "sit on- ????"
said boy only blinked his eyes a few times before the realisation of what he really said washed through him. in just a few seconds, he found himself stuttering and waving his hands in the air, sweating profusely. "i-i meant on my lap! seriously! i mean!! she looked stressed!! i didnt mean anything bad i promise!"
you had nothing to say, except laugh. his rambling was sort of cute. but you knew izuku was just a friend, he was only being considerate — its in his nature. "come on guys, you know what midoriya meant."
despite being incredibly shy when it came to all things izuku, you didnt want to miss this chance. you walked over to him, sitting across his lap and resting your back on the arm rest. the edge of the armrest was hard, so izuku slipped his arm there before you even laid your back. his arm was eventually going to ache, you thought, but he still did it anyways. everyone else seemed to have gotten distracted or bored after seeing izukus reaction, and went onto their usual chit chatter before starting the movie.
"thank you midoriya. i didnt know what to do." you quietly admitted, a bit flustered as you were sitting on his lap, playing with your hands awkwardly.
"no worries. i know how it is to overthink. i just hope youre comfortable?" he asked with a sheepish smile, noticing how awkward you were. it took you aback — was he always this thoughtful?
"y-yeah. i am." you looked away, not being able to bare any more eye contact with him. you guys were only friends, and you hadnt been in a relationship in years... maybe thats why you felt the way you did.
the movie went on, entrancing everyone into it. you on the one hand couldnt focus on anything but the mere fact you were sitting on izukus lap, and you werent sure why you even did so. the urge just to melt into him was strong, but you prevailed since you convinced yourself you "didnt want to take advantage of his kindness", even though the boy fully invited you to get comfortable. your neck was currently in a bit of pain from craning it to the side, and you felt too shy to move incase you block his vision or invade his personal space. why did you sit in this position? were you dumb? you were literally frozen trying to not distract him from the movie — something you wish youd be enjoying too.
"your necks going to hurt if you keep on craning it that way. wanna face forward?" midoriya whispered in your ear as to not disturb the others. you felt how close he was in the midst of your overthinking, and it jolted you, oblivious to midoriya. it made him chuckle, but his breath against your skin lingered even when you jolted away. you wanted to chase that feeling again, but fought against it.
"if thats fine... with you i mean!" you exclaimed — you were so thankful it was dark. you didnt want him to see you flustered over his actions when he was just trying to be kind. you wouldnt have minded sitting on anyone elses lap at this moment of time, or even the floor. his actions didnt make you uncomfortable, but rather made you want to-
"of course yn. get as comfortable as you want! think of me as like... a chair!" he quietly joked. you couldnt find that funny in the way he did, but it definitely felt funny to you. it didnt help how you were already feeling. the butterflies in your stomach were running rampage, and below that... you just hoped he didnt feel anything on his thighs. he clearly didnt realise what he was saying... or maybe that was just you feeling otherwise. still, you shifted yourself and found yourself comfortable in his lap, your back now on his chest, faces just cms apart.
for the rest of the movie, you calmed yourself down and found comfort in your position. normally, your mind would be running miles over being this close, to the point where you could count every freckle, but something about him was warm, and his steady heartbeat lulled you to sleep.
when you awoke, you found the movie was already over. you shuffled around, trying to wake yourself up after a good rest. you couldnt see anyone else, so you figured everyone had left after the movie ended.
"awake?"
you jumped, not expecting anyone to be around. "midoriya?"
"you were asleep on my lap, remember?" he reminded, albeit sheepishly, "you fell asleep."
"oh my god yes! im so sorry. i mustve kept you there for-" you turned to check the time, "hours!! im so sorry midoriya!"
he waved one of his hands in response, putting his phone down in the process. "its okay - you looked so comfortable i didnt wanna wake you."
"ugh... i so owe you. thank you for everything tonight." you sighed. if it wasnt for midoriya, you mightve considered leaving movie night as a whole.
his eyes lingered on you, but so did yours.
"yn?" you looked at him, "could i..."
you could practically see the clogs in his head whirring. there was nothing he could possibly be thinking about, except getting sleep for a long day of lectures tomorrow. he was stuck overthinking as to what he should say or maybe how he should say it, and in that time you found yourself admiring his features. since you and izuku were just friends, you never got the chance to see him up close — how did you never notice how pretty he was?
he probably didnt want what you were hoping he would want. with a sigh, you got yourself ready to leave, wanting to wash all your inappropriate thoughts about midoriya away as to not make this awkward for yourself in the future. he was still your classmate after all. he noticed you shuffling, and that broke him out of his trance. he infact did want what you want. in the first place, he only asked out of kindness, but things changed over time, for example, when you were shuffling against him — he couldnt believe how stupidly oblivious he was. just as you were about to stand, you felt the hem of your shirt being grabbed, "come back."
you looked back, confused. did you get the wrong idea? "please." he asked. and that answered everything. you felt like a giddy highschooler.
in a trance, you found yourself back on his lap, lips on his, minds blank. one thing lead to another, and you began straddling his hips, and his hands found themselves under your shirt. good thing no one else was around.
for the first time in forever, the two of you couldnt even think.
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eyesthatroll · 1 year
Text
needy | jack hughes
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pairing; jh86 x fem!reader
warning(s); fluff, established relationship, idk what else, smidge of angst (?), lowercase intended, not rlly edited.
word count; 1.1k
summary; jack comes home from a five game road trip
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"can you please come to bed?" jack whines from across the hall, interrupting your concentration.
pausing the outline you were currently writing, you let out a deep sigh. "just a few more minutes, j."
you hear stumbling across the floor, and in moments jack is leaning against the doorframe, wrapped in a burrito blanket you got for your birthday last year.
his hair has gotten longer since that last time you’ve seen him, messily resting past his ears and down his neck.
"you said that ten minutes ago."
you look up, and meet jacks pleading gaze. "you look tired, love. why don't you try and get some sleep?"
it was a little after one am, you were growing tired, and you knew he was too.
he rolls his eyes at you. "i miss you. didn't you miss me, when i was gone?"
removing your glasses, you rubbed at your eyes with your palms, trying to rid the looming tiredness.
of course you missed him, you always did, but you had inventory at work on monday and an important deadline coming up, you couldn't just drop everything because he was home. you had a life without him, too.
"of course i missed you, jack. i just need a little bit more time to work without you bothering me every five minutes, please." you knew the moment you said it, that you shouldn't have.
jack's eyes widen momentarily, as if he can't believe the words that just came out of your mouth.
jack is normally needy, roadie's aside. that was actually one of the first things that made you fall in love with him, his constant need to show you how much he valued and cared about you.
your family is emotionally distant, you've only hugged your dad maybe five times in your life, and you don't think you've ever heard him say i love you to your mom.
jack said it everyday, multiple times a day. leaving to go to practice, "i love you". ending every phone call "i love you". you made him dinner, "i love you"
you had yet to say it back to him.
there was a time you wanted to, but then it passed, and now every time you think about saying it, it just feels forced.
jack hasn’t taken offense that you haven’t said it yet, he knows how you are with this sort of thing.
‘whenever your ready’ he says.
"sure, yeah. sorry for bothering you." jack turns on his heels, not giving you a chance to respond.
the door closes quietly, echoing throughout the quiet apartment.
you sit in silence, your brain not quite processing what had just happened.
you figured you might as well finish your work, then call it a night. you plugged your headphones in and chose a random spotify playlist to work to.
it's about two hours later when you finally give in and close your macbook with a curse under your breath.
shutting the lamp off, you make your way to your bedroom, opening to door quietly as you're unsure if jack is awake or not. part of you hopes he is awake, so you can form some sort of apology.
hockey plays quietly on the tv, while jack is laying down, his body turned towards the window, light snores escaping him.
you go to the bathroom and brush your teeth, too tired to bother with your skincare routine tonight.
stripping out of your day clothes, you throw on one of jacks t-shirts that he's left, and join him in bed. you spared one last look at your boyfriend, before turning the tv off.
turning so your back is facing his, you shut your eyes, and try and force yourself to sleep.
after hours of tossing and turning, you glance at the clock to see that only about 45 minutes has passed since you last checked the time.
turning back to jack, you shook his shoulder. "jack.. jack wake up."
groaning, he pushes your hand off him, turning to face you. "what time is it?"
"a little after three."
"oh.. did something happen? are you okay?" he gives you a concerned look, his face illuminated by the small nightlight in the corner.
"no, nothing happened."
his lips part in confusion. "i don't understand."
"fuck i just-i don't want you to be mad at me, okay?!"
jack jumps slightly at your outburst.
"i'm sorry." you add quickly, before he has a chance to speak.
jack avoids your gaze, seemingly unsure of what to say. "it's not-i should've just left you to your work."
you reach out, brushing stray fallen hair out of his eye line. "you know me, you know i'm not good with.. feelings. but im trying, for you. of course i miss you when your gone, maybe too much. that's why i'm always working, i guess. to distract when your not here."
jack watches you intently. the two of you have moved closer now, his hand palming small circles on your thigh.
"it makes it easier, to not have days off when all i can do is think about you."
"you can always facetime me, or text me when im on the road." he says.
"i know, i just-i don't wanna annoy you. and please don't say 'you could never annoy me' because i know that's not true." you tell him.
"i would love to hear more from you when i’m on the road. even if it's a text here and there, it'll be nice to know you're thinking about me."
you nod.
"and if, you start to annoy me, i'll let you know." he finishes.
you crack a smile. "okay."
jack pulls you into his side. "though, you could never annoy me, because i love you."
"me too." you say, out of habit, but you continue. "i love you, too.”
"you love me?" jack asks, his face, a mixture of adoration and awe.
"stop it." you mumble against his chest.
"i knew it." he's teasing.
"only cause' i just told you."
"luke told me."
you whip you head up to look at him. "when?!"
he laughs at your response. "not sure, maybe a few months ago."
your face contorts in confusion, then realization. "i’m never telling luke anything again."
you lay back down, wrapping your arms around him.
"you loooooove me."
"you're gonna sleep outside."
"you can't make someone you love sleep outside!"
mari speaks! emptying my drafts i guess. if this sucks—sorry, i just started seriously writing a few months ago, so any constructive criticism is always appreciated, thanks! 🙂
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steddiealltheway · 1 year
Text
Thinking about Robin bursting into Steve’s house - he gave her a spare key long ago - and yelling, “I was just Nancy’s gay awakening!”
Steve is laying on the ground in the living room and sits up. “What?”
Robin launches into the story, “Well, I was just at Nancy’s as you know, and she insisted that she wanted to basically play dress up with me. So, she handed me some clothes and she jokingly changed into mine which were huge on her and so incredibly adorable. I mean-”
“Robin,” Steve says trying to cut off her inevitable Nancy ramble.
“Right. So, there I am in Nancy’s bra and pulling her really itchy shirt over my head, and when I finally get my head out, Nancy is staring at me in her panicked way. And I thought well, maybe I ripped one of her favorite shirts because it was tight and I may have heard a rip-”
Steve lightly taps her arm, and Robin nods. “But then, she just says, ‘Robin, when did you know that you were… you know… gay.’ And I didn’t think much of it, but I told her, and then she said asked if it can happen later in life. And the dots just connected, and I told her yes it can.” Robin finishes her rant in a frenzied state still as out of breath as when she got there.
“And then what happened?” Steve asks.
“I stole Mike’s bike and came here,” Robin says staring off with wide eyes.
Steve stares at her and blinks slowly. “So she’s had this gay awakening, and you ran away and left her to deal with it alone?”
Robin looks at Steve even more panicked. “Holy shit! Holy shit. Holy shit. Holy shit!” She stands up and runs to the door. “I’ll be back later!”
The front door slams shut and Steve sighs.
“I was wondering when Nancy would realize,” a voice over Steve’s shoulder says.
Steve jumps. “Shit, Eddie. I forgot you were here.”
Eddie puts a hand over his heart. “I’m hurt, Steve. Hurt. I’m always here.”
Steve looks off and questions his past relationship with Nancy. Yes, he got over her in a romantic way long ago especially when Robin told him she had feelings for Nance. And it’s been a weight off his shoulders but he can’t help but wonder…
“Hey, what’s going on?” Eddie asks already on the ground next to Steve.
Steve shakes his head, but he knows Eddie is stubborn so he gives in. “Do you think Nancy was gay when she dated me, and that’s why things never really worked out? I mean, I just feel bad for doing everything with her if she wasn’t happy.”
Eddie takes a moment and then shakes his head. “Steve, a person doesn’t just suddenly become gay, but I think what you’re missing is that I don’t think Nancy is a lesbian. I’m pretty sure she’s bisexual. Which means she likes both.”
Steve thinks for a second and realizes it makes sense. “So, she had more of a bisexual awakening than just a gay awakening.”
Eddie shrugs. “Yeah, you could put it that way. What I had was definitely a gay awakening though. It was in the gym and this one guy stripped off his shirt and it all suddenly hit that yes, I was definitely gay.”
Steve stares off and suddenly blurts out, “Do you think I could have a bisexual awakening?”
Eddie’s jaw drops before he stutters out, “Ye-yeah. I mean… I-I guess you could. But it’s not something you can just force yourself to do.”
“Take off your shirt,” Steve says seriously because he’s curious.
“Dude, I’m not going to force a gay or bisexual awakening on you.”
Steve looks Eddie up and down for a second. He’s always known he’s attractive, just like he knew Billy was attractive and even Tommy in his own way. But it was only fair to notice who would be potential rivals when Steve started dating. But… he knows Eddie is gay, so why would he note his attractiveness?
Eddie sighs and stands up to take off his shirt. “Okay, now you can go back to being your straight self,” Eddie says already pulling his shirt back on.
Steve takes a moment to process, but then he grabs Eddie’s hand and drags him up the stairs. “Steve, there is now way you’re about to do what I think you’re going to do.”
“I sure am!” Steve yells determined.
A few minutes and a lot of complaining later, Eddie has Steve’s jeans on and is pulling his yellow sweater over his head. Eddie even does a little spin.
Steve looks him over and realizes that he feels the same way towards Eddie as he always has. He definitely finds him attractive, and even has the thought in the back of his head that he wouldn’t mind kissing him. Plus, Eddie in his clothes is definitely adorable wait-
Since when has he always wanted to kiss Eddie?
“Oh shit. You cannot tell me that this actually worked,” Eddie says and then laughs. “Okay, very funny, Steve. You can cut it out now.” Steve feels Eddie grab his shoulders, “Steve?”
Steve turns to look at him and says, “Eddie, I really want to kiss you.”
Eddie steps back and says, “Steve, this really isn’t funny. Just knock it off.”
“I’m serious,” Steve says with as much conviction as he has. “And I don’t mean just right now, but I mean that it’s always been there in the back of my head, and I’ve been ignoring it. But, shit, I want to kiss you.”
“Why don’t you buy me dinner first?” Eddie jokes and then stops. “You’re serious?”
“One hundred percent.”
Eddie walks closer to Steve mumbling under his breath, “I cannot believe this worked. Must be a bisexual thing.”
Steve laughs and says, “Maybe it is.”
Eddie finally gets up in front of him and cups his jaw. “I’m going to kiss you now.”
“Not if I beat you to i-”
Eddie cuts him off with a soft kiss before pulling away and looking at Steve with a bit of fear in his eyes.
“Holy shit, I’m bisexual,” Steve says with a laugh before kissing Eddie again. He pulls back and says, “Wait, this isn’t just you helping me to realize, right? Like, I want to go on a date with you. Multiple if you wanted that…”
“Oh thank fuck,” Eddie says and kisses Steve again.
Steve will have to thank Nancy and Robin later.
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ldysmfrst · 1 month
Text
American Mate - (5) Heated Discussions
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Paring: Hybrid!BTS Ot7 x Plus-sized Human FemReader
Status: Ongoing series
Chapter number: 5 of unknown
Word count for Chapter: 2765 (sorry it is so short)
Work count for Story: 19,008
Genre: Hybrid Playmate Au inspired by works created by @yoongiofmine
A little about the author: I am a mother of two beautiful children. One of which is special needs, and on 3/28, they lost 75% of their vision. I started a Ko-fi and a Patreon if you feel the heart to donate towards helping with the medical costs of appointments, medication, and modifications to the house, which insurance doesn't cover.
Warnings: (I am not good at this, but I will try. Let me know if I missed anything!!) NOT BETA READ!! This story will have a bit of angst, fluff, smut, f/m, m/m, and m/f/m. This chapter does have Injury, Anxiety, arguments, comfort, Alpha Space, close proximity, and scenting.
Story Summary: The Hybrid K-pop group BTS is on tour in America; of course, things don't start out the way they should, but after an encounter with Y/n, things change but will everyone follow Fate?
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Keep Safe. Keep Safe. First, it was Taehyung, and now it's Yoongi. Alpha Space seems to be no joke. Derek was not lying when he said this mindset helps them protect. Let’s hope this doesn’t mean they will treat you like a child.
Walking out of the elevator, you cannot help but smile at the rest of the Bangtan pack. While still in pain, you felt safe around them. 
“Excuse me, Miss Y/n. I have a few things that I would like to discuss with you before we get going. Allow me to walk you to your van,” Manager Sejin directs you off to the side with a nod from Namjoon. 
Yoongi closely follows you as you go with Manager Sejin. “Miss Y/n, thank you for your care and consideration in this situation. I can promise you that it will not be easy for the eight of you, but it will be worth it.”
As he speaks, you feel a tail wrap around your waist, and a hand touches your back. Looking over your shoulder, you see that Yoongi has his hand on your upper back but is facing away from you, looking at his packmates. 
Noticing that the group has gathered in a circle, something significant is being discussed. Not wanting to keep Yoongi from doing something important, you look back at the manager.
“Manager Sejin, I do not feel so well. Can you please take me to the van? I would like to sit down and process things.” He nods and moves towards the van in front.
“Mr. Min,” you smile softly at the jaguar as he looks at you, keeping an ear tuned in to the group of men. “I am going to go sit in the van. I am sure that I will be fine there while I wait for you and your packmates.”
Adding a bit of a pout to your smile, you ask, “Can you go and make sure everything is okay so that we can go? My hand is really starting to hurt?”
“Yes. Van safe. Manager Safe. Go packhouse now.” Yoongi responds.
Unwrapping his tail, he pushes on your back softly, urging you to get in. He returns to the circle of hybrids in what looks like a new heated discussion.
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After exiting the elevator, Taehyung makes to stay with you, Yoongi, and the manager but is stopped by Jungkook. The younger one knows Taehyung would want to be a part of the discussion that is soon to come, even if he is still in Alpha Space.
After you had gone off with Yoongi and their manager, the remaining packmates circled up at the youngest's request. The mates seek comfort in one another. Jungkook hugs Taehyung from behind, while Jimin hugs Hoseok around the waist as he leans against Seokjin.
Most of the pack had been through finding mates since there are six of them. Jungkook was the only one who understood the concept of what to do with a new mate but had never been on this side of the situation. 
“There are two vans. Obviously, Yoongi will be going in the van with Y/n, but who is going with them?” asks Jungkook, looking around as it dawns on them. 
The vans only fit five people in the back. Each mate immediately started proposing why they had to be in the same van as you, all at once. 
Seokjin said he only got to speak to you before the observation room and needed to see if his Alpha would react like everyone else has so far.
Hoseok tops everyone, saying that he has only ever gotten to look at you, and it’s high time he was able to speak to the newest mate.
Jimin agrees with Hoseok and thinks he can help get Yoongi out of Alpha Space on the trip to the packhouse.
Taehyung keeps quiet, his Alpha Space pulling at him to be near you again soon. However, Taehyung’s Alpha was much calmer and understood that being the second youngest meant he would most likely not be allowed to go. 
Jungkook argues that he was the one who got you to calm down in the break room, and your instincts are already reacting to him. Therefore, he is the best person to keep you calm from here on out.
Rubbing his temples, Namjoon lets out a sigh. He said you were ‘no trouble,’ but you really are gonna be trouble for them, but not in a way he is worried about. It's just going to be a change in dynamic.
“Guys, we all want to spend time with our new mate, but we must remember that she is human and doesn’t understand. Right now, all she knows is that Yoongi is deep in Alpha Space, and we, as a pack, must help her situation.”
“How are we going to tell her, Hyung? If her family member's statement is true, she won’t believe us,” Jimin says, looking your way, ears flat in concern.
“That is a good question. I don’t have an answer right now.”
“We may not have much time to come up with something. She needs to know. She needs to understand,” Hoseok voices with watery eyes. If what that man upstairs said truly is the kind of person you are, they must help you grow to recognize yourself. 
Moving to hug Hoseok with the others, Jungkook adds, “She may know about hybrids, but she doesn’t know enough about the Alpha-side of the culture, and what’s even worse is that she doesn’t know how precious she is.”
“That’s it! I go in van. Show Mate real!” Taehyung finally speaks up. He turns to walk toward you with a puffed tail and determination, only to be stopped by Soekjin.
“No, you have spent time with her. She knows you care, but she still thinks I am looking at one of the playmates they introduced us to. I am going to go with her.”
Within seconds, they are back to all talking over each other. Each of them demanded the other stay behind with justifications. This time, Namjoon joins in the fray. None of them notice that you have entered the van, and Yoongi is standing just outside the circle, watching the hushed chaos. 
With a stern voice that is just a bit louder than everyone else, Yoongi declares, “Packhouse, go now. Mate in pain.”
Silence takes over the group as they all look in your direction. Though you are inside the van, they can still see you. Taking in your appearance, they notice your wrist keeps swelling more, your face is paler, and you are bouncing your leg with nerves.
"Yoongi-hyung is right. We need to go. Yoongi, Hoseok, Jungkook, and I will go with Y/n. The rest of you will go in the other van,” Pack Alpha says with a hint of Alpha voice, trying his best to get everyone going. 
“No,” Soekjin counters. “I pull the eldest card. Kookie, I am sorry but you should go with the others and help with Tae. I want to talk with her.”
“Hyuuunnnnggg,” whined the youngest, “fine, I will sit in the reject van.” Jungkook stomps off to the second van. His ears droopy, and his shoulders rounded like a scolded child.
“We got our bun,” Jimin says as he follows, pulling the still crystal-eyed Taehyung along. He mutters promises of scenting, nesting, and various kinds of cuddles if the Alpha joins him and the bunny in the second van.
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Taking a seat in the van, you notice two captain chairs and a bench seat. Not knowing where everyone else sat, you figured Yoongi’s Alpha would practically require him to sit near you, which meant the bench seat would be the best. 
Sitting in the middle of the bench but on the edge of the seat, you bounce your leg while you wait because your anxiety is still bugging you. Your wrist is throbbing now. 
You wish you had something to drink as you eye the bottles of water sitting in the different cup holders. Wishing they had something more potent, you keep quiet, and your eyes return to watching the group talk.
Noticing where your line of sight was, Manager Sejin grabbed a bottle of water from the cooler built into the center console, opened it, and held it out to you. “Would you like something to drink? We only have water.”
“Oh, thank you, Sir. I didn’t want to take something that belonged to the pack.”
Shaking his head, Manager Sejin can smell your nervousness as his eyes flit over your form. Then he takes a quick look at the pack. They are still deep in discussion. Finally, he looks you in the eye. 
With a sigh, “Miss y/n, may I give you some advice?”
Swallowing your water quickly, you give him your full attention and nod.
“You are a person. A person that has needs, wants, and desires. Don’t be afraid to speak up. Ask for things. Demand things. I know they can be a bit much but they are each a person just like you. Idol or not.”
At the sound of footsteps, both of you look to see some of them approaching. Before he moves to the front seat, he says, “They will be there for you.” 
You are not sure what was more surprising. The fact that the two captain's chairs could turn to face the backseat or that Yoongi allowed you to be sandwiched between his older packmates.
Seokjin entered first. He sat on the bench to your left, and you hurried over to give him room. This was short-lived because next came Hoseok.
Hoseok gracefully wiggled his way to your right side on the bench. No wonder he was a dance god, you thought to yourself as you dropped your eyes to the floor to avoid watching his chest and hips pass your face.
This puts you in the middle and unable to keep any respectful distance between yourself and them. Feeling a blush creep up your neck and face as the two men’s bodies pressed against your larger form, you move to sit on one of the other chairs. 
“Sit. Safe. Hyungs…hmmm…” Yoongi starts to explain, but his Alpha Space limits his words since he and his Alpha don’t want to give too much information about you being their mate just yet.
“Sit, please, doll. Yoongi will want to sit near the door to be your first line of defense. I guess you could say,” Hoseok speaks up gently, pulling at your elbow and guiding you back to your seat.
“Yes. Keep Safe. Guard.” Yoongi says with the look of a drill sergeant on his face as he takes the chair near the door. Namjoon, having already taken his seat in the other chair, spun it to face you.
“Guarding the door, got it but I could sit in the chair and Mr. Prime Alpha could sit with you. I am sure it would be more comfortable with him here than with me.”
Next thing you know, you are face-to-face with Seokjin as he leans his chest across your body to tighten you in. You hold your breath as you make eye contact with his deep, intelligent eyes.  
“I do hope you are not implying what I think you are,” Seokjin comments while handing Hoseok your seatbelt.
His eyes are searching yours for something. As your blush deepens, a smirk grows on his face before he says, “you are much more cozy to sit with than Joon, Miss y/n.”
You are dizzy at the thought of making yourself ‘cozy’ with Seokjin. Blinking rapidly, you try to return to this reality and out of the gutter as you chuckle a response, “Ah, cozy, haha, I don’t think Gabriel Iglesias uses that in his levels.”
A mixture of hissing and growls fills the van. Your eyes snap up to see that Seokjin is the one hissing as he sits back correctly. Looking over, you see Namjoon’s jaw is set, and Yoongi’s eyes have narrowed as they growl. 
Instinctually, you lean away from the dangerous noise makers which causes you to press against Hoseok. Placing a hand back on your elbow, he leans forward, whispering in your right ear, “Doll, I think you have had some rather mean and disrespectful people around you in your past, but you are with us now.”
“We do not allow for anyone to be self-deprecating. From the look on Yoongi’s face this isn’t the first time you have done this.”
Not taking your eyes off the three men whom you seemed to piss off yet again, “It’s not self-deprecation. It’s pointing out the truth, which helps me stay grounded.”
A soft hiss is heard in your ear, causing you to jolt forward, only to be stopped by an arm now around your waist. Hoseok chuckles as he pulls you back against his chest. His warm breath only adds warmth to your already heated skin. 
Whispering in your other ear, “While it is nice that you are so instinctually responsive to us, doll. You must learn to listen when you are told something. In time you will believe what we tell you as well.”
While time in the van seemingly stops and sound becomes non-existent, the focus is on you as you battle your various reactions. 
Your body responds in a mix of ways. The lean but fit body pressed against your back warms you, causing your heart rate to race. However, the deep chuckles, hot breath on your neck, and primal eyes watching you cause heat to start pooling lower on your body.
Your mind is back in your damn nightmare because you cannot seem to go more than five minutes without causing some kind of adverse reaction from the world’s most famous male K-pop band.
To top it off, you are internally scolding yourself for losing your professionalism when all you want to do is figure out how to make them stop being upset at you and hide before they notice that you are getting riled up over basically nothing.
Your gutter of a mind now takes the nightmare of being hunted by the pack of Alphas in a much different direction. 
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“Kookie! Kookie! Come on, bun. You know Jin-hyung is only trying to find ways to help,” Jimin coos at the upset bunny hybrid. Shaking his head, Jimin wonders why it is his job always to calm down these two lovebirds.
Realizing Jungkook is a lost cause, Jimin undoes his seatbelt and sits in Taehyung’s lap, gaining his attention. Jimin asks, “Alpha, is this okay? We really need Tae Tae back to help with Kookie and our newest mate. If I scent you well, can you let go?”
The crystal blue eyes look over his slightly older mate,”Scent then help mates.”
Smiling sweetly at the Alpha, Jimin noses at his jaw, causing the tiger to tilt his head to grant more space. Scooting forward and resting fully on Tae’s thighs, Jimin rubs his cheek along Tae’s jawline. Soft puffs of warm air blow across Tae’s neck, causing the Alpha’s breath to hitch. 
Continuing his journey, Jimin sniffs down the tip of his ear, down his neck to the bend where the scent of ebony wood is most robust. Pressing a soft kiss to the gland, the scenting session continues. 
The scent of ebony wood, oranges, and vanilla mixes. It is not long before the pouting bunny hybrid starts to watch his hyungs. Long forgotten is the reason why he is upset as he slowly releases his own calming cinnamon-like scent into the mix. 
Realizing that he has successfully got one of the two mates into a better mood, Jimin ups the ante. Shifting his weight forward, he lays his body flush against Taehyung. Within moments, Taehyung’s hand gripped Jimin’s tiny waist, pulling him in tighter.
Chirping happily at the response, Jimin kisses up and down Taehyung’s neck. When Taehyung starts to scent Jimin back, Jimin nips over the scent gland and laves it with his tongue, mixing their scents deeper.
Soon, the youngest joined them on the bench, sniffing the air and whining. Shifting closer, his bunny tail wiggled, and his ears stood as tall as they could inside the van.
“Tae-hyung, Minie-hyung, can I join? Please?” Jungkook asks as he softly places a hand on Jimin’s thigh. 
Nodding, Jumin moves to the other side of Taehyung’s neck, and Jungkook takes his place. Drowning the spaced-out Alpha in the loving scents of his two mates.
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harlowsbby · 6 months
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Nonsense 💘
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Requested, What about the reader pranking Jack by making him think she doesn’t want him kissing her.
“You two must want me to be single for the holidays or what?”
Urban and Annie laughed at your answer to their questions. “Come on it’ll be fun and you know it.” Annie argued.
“I agree, you know how worked up Jack gets it’ll be so funny he’d be so confused and irritated at the same time.” You rolled your eyes and huffed.
Urban and Annie came up with this bright idea well more like a prank. The saw a few videos going around of girls either dodging or acting like they don’t want a kiss from their boyfriends.
You weren’t going to lie you were actually down to do it but at the same time the two of you have been arguing lately like cats dogs and the last thing you wanted to do was start up another argument.
“What’s in it for me?” You asked them. “We’ll do anything you want for 24 hours?” Urban said.
“That’s all? I need something more.” Annie rolled her eyes. “I’ll buy you coffee for an entire week straight.” You smirked. “Sounds like a deal.”
After they explained everything again you hung up the phone and waited on the couch till Jack got back home from the studio.
It was about twenty minutes later when Jack came walking through the door, a smile and all was displayed on his face upon seeing you.
“Hey baby.” He said and placed his keys down into the bowl near the entry way.
When you didn’t say anything his head immediately shot up towards you, his eyebrows scrunched together.
“Babe? Can you not hear me or what.” He said and started to approach you. It was honestly really hard trying not to acknowledge him because all you wanted to do was kiss him and let him hold you.
“Hellooo? Earth to Y/N I know you can hear me I’m standing right in front of you.”
He huffed when you didn’t even flinch or anything, you just kept scrolling through your phone.
“What? I’m sorry Jack I was so into this game.” You decided to talk to him but whenever he tried to lean in for a kiss you’d dodge it.
“I was going to say I know you weren’t about to give me the silent treatment again. I missed you today.” He leaned down and went to give you a kiss and moved back slightly.
“How was the studio? Anything interesting happen today?”
You asked him and stood up and made your way into the kitchen. He stood there for a minute more trying to process that you just completely dodged his kiss.
When he made it into the kitchen you were grabbing a box of red velvet cake mix.
“I was thinking about making some cupcakes what do you think?” You asked him and tried your best to stiff a laugh at how confused he looked.
“What’s up with you?” He asked questionably. “What do you mean? Nothing is wrong all I asked was do you wanna help me bake some cupcakes or not.”
“I mean yeah I’ll help you I guess.” You smiled. “Sounds good just get me my mixing bowl and a spoon.” He nodded and went and grabbed what you needed.
When he came back he placed everything down in front of you and leaned forward to try and place another kiss on your lips but you pulled back once again.
Jack was in disbelief he wasn’t sure what your issue or problem was but he didn’t understand why you weren’t allowing him to kiss you.
“Alright Y/N what’s your problem dude?” You laughed. “Dude? I’m not your dude I’m babe, baby or boo.” He rolled his eyes.
“No you’re not because my baby allows me to kiss her. When I came back home you were ignoring me and now you keep dodging my kisses, what the hell did I do now?” He raised his hands in frustration.
“You didn’t do anything I’m just trying to bake us some cupcakes.” You innocently stated and opened up the box of cake mix.
“Am I being pranked or some shit? Give me a kiss.” He went back in to place a quick peck to your lips but you pulled back and laughed.
“Seriously!” You grinned. “What?” You asked innocently. He smacked his lips.
“Fuck this ima get my kiss.” He quickly grabbed the back of your neck gently and forced your head up and placed a long and gentle kiss to your lips before pulling back.
“Was that so hard? That’s all I wanted.” He stated and grabbed the bowl from you and started pouring all the ingredients into the bowl.
You couldn’t help but to laugh if there was one thing Jack was good at it was getting his way.
“So who made you do this little prank?” He asked while you sat across from him.
“Urban and Annie they though it would be funny.” You knew they’d both give you shit for ratting them out but you didn’t care.
“The next time I see Urban I’m beating his ass as for Annie well I guess she gets a pass this time.” You laughed and leaned up a bit over the counter and went to place a kiss to Jack’s lips but he pulled back making you gasp.
“Two can play that game baby.” You groaned and whined. “Seriously?!? It was a little prank. You’re so petty and childish.”
He shrugged his shoulders and grinned. “But you love me though.”
“That I do, that I do.” The rest of the night was spent cuddled up by the fire just enjoying your cupcakes in peace.
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aajjks · 8 months
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Lovers (m)
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synopsis. you love him so much. You’ll die if he ever leaves you.
warnings.YÄNDËRË CÖNTËNT, mätůrè cöntënt, ünhëälthy rëlätïönshïp, pösëssïvënëss, yändêrê nöönä, sůggëstïvë cöntënt, 18+ cöntënt.
note. HAPPY BIRTHDAY TO ME!!!! I’m getting old but send in asks? SHARE FEEDBACK AND ENJOY. *not edited*
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Even just looking at him makes you feel calm.
You’re not sure about how you got so lucky to stumble upon jungkook three years ago, but you are so glad that you found him, maybe it was destiny.
Maybe it was destiny’s plan to bring you two together, maybe it was your destiny’s way to make up for all the bad things that happened in your life by bringing Jungkook in your life.
And he is the best thing in your life.
Sometimes you cannot believe that he’s yours and that he loves you so much. The question often lingers in your mind that why does he love you so much? What is it that makes him so crazy about you? Why is he so obsessed with you?
And when you ask him that question you only get one answer.
“because I was made to love you.” he says it without hesitation every single time, His brown bambi eyes full of love, and honesty.
The way he looks at you every time every single day it makes your heart clench in your chest, how can someone love you this much?
His love for you has you addicted. You don’t think you can live without his love anymore, you need his attention you crave it every single moment of the day.
He’s got you, so used to this.
He Is standing with you watching the neighbors as they move in, the wind is so clear, hitting your face, he is holding your hand, so tightly so focused on that woman who carries those boxes.
You’re focused on him instead gazing at him, his innocence, is the best thing about him, the way he gets so curious about the littlest things it makes you so happy, he’s like a child almost in an adult body.
“Noona, do you think I should help that girl carry the boxes? I mean it would be kind of me don’t you think? And they’re our neighbors, so maybe I should go and help her?”
That pulls you out of your thoughts, you process his words, and it almost makes you annoyed. “but why Baby? I think that elderly man is enough and I don’t think you need to go and help her.”
Sometimes it makes you angry too that how kind he can be and how naïve he is, He makes you feel so territorial, you’re so possessive about him it scares you.
As you gaze up forward to see the woman you take your time to notice her appearance, she looks pretty young, that blonde hair, and those green eyes.. you are pretty sure they’re green, her nose is almost perfect, and her lips look pretty.
You don’t like that. Insecurity immediately bubbles up in your chest. You sigh as you looked at her. Jungkook hums an okay and shrugs.
“come on baby let’s go inside I don’t like the weather anymore.”
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it’s been a few days since your neighbors have moved in, you see the pretty girl, occasionally when you go out for work, it is ridiculous how pretty she is, she manages to look flawless, even at 7 AM in the morning.
You notice everything about her.
And you’re pretty sure that Jungkook does too.
And now you’re sitting at home, exhausted and insecure.
“Noona, why are you so quiet today? I missed you so much and you just came home showered and now you’re just sitting so quietly you didn’t even kiss me today… did I do something wrong?”
you blink twice as you see him stare at you with a gloomy expression and pouty lips.
“Tell me kookie.” You clear your throat. Crossing your arms on your chest you look at him with a serious expression, and he nods eagerly.
“Ask me anything I’ll tell you anything just talk to me.” He looks at you so desperately, his lips are quivering, “fine.”
“do you find her attractive?”
You don’t even know why you asked him this question,
but it was eating you up inside she’s way more beautiful than you can ever be. You’re also getting older. You don’t even feel like celebrating your birthday anymore
You’ve become so insecure in the span of three years, ever since he came into your life. He’s so beautiful, so handsome and so young.
What is he doing here with you?
Are you holding him back?
“I mean, she’s your age she’s beautiful she seems happy too… she is perfect. Do you like her?”
You stand up, suddenly, and look at him, borrowing your eyes into his. Your bunny boy stares up at you with his eyes completely caught off guard, his mouth is wide, with shock in his eyes, they get glossy
“Tell me Jungkook. Is noona not enough for you anymore?” Your heart feels like it will sink. You feel sick. The insides of your stomach are doing flips you’re not sure if you want to hear the answer what if he says yes he is tired of you?
What if he says yes, that he wants to be with her or he finds her attractive? The silence is eating you up yet you are not ready to hear his answer.
God you feel sick.
The jealousy is eating you from the inside, you haven’t felt hungry in so many days you can’t sleep because whenever you try to sleep the thought of him with her together fuck with your mind..
And she visits your house often, always smiling with her perfect teeth sometimes bringing cookies or pies, and he opens the door every time, smiling back at her, accepting her treats.
“N-Noona w-what are you even- shhh.”
You silence him before he can complete his sentence. You stalk closer to him, your head hurts from all the thinking you’ve been doing these past days.
You cannot lose him.
No you can’t.
“I love you so much koo. I really do.” You stop, he listens to you carefully, his brown eyes surprised but he doesn’t interrupt you, “I love you so much.” You let the tears fall, your voice shakes.
These emotions are so intense.
“Y-You love noona too right? You’ll never leave me right?” You kneel down on your knees, he’s sitting on the couch, frozen, his eyes fixed on you.
You grab his thighs, your nails dig into his jeans. “Tell me now Jungkook!” He doesn’t speak; it is driving you insane.
He’s so stupid!
“Too bad, even if you will, you can’t leave me Jungkook.”
You start laughing, something switches inside you.
You take your hands off him, “I’ll lock you up.”
Jungkook stands up and leans down so he can sit down infront of you.
“Really? What are you gonna do? Tell me noona.”
Your laughter stops.
You bite the inside of your cheek, you’re so confused right now, he’s breaking your heart.
“Tell me what are you going to do to me?”
“YOU ARE MINE. I’ll lock you up and never let you go.”
“You were actually right Jungkook. You were made to love me. Only me..” he listens to you so intently, you can hear how his panicked breathing matches with yours, none of you speak another word.
He closes the distance between you, you can feel his breath on your face and the rapid heartbeat, it’s synchronized.
“tell me that you love me please I need to hear it… please baby…” you beg him, your emotions are a mess. You’re not sure if this is because of lack of sleep or your insecurities
Jungkook looks at you with a weird dark hue in his eyes, his lips are pressed together in a thin line, it is frustrating you to know, and that he’s refusing to say anything.
It feels like years, and it’s been only a few seconds. His silence is like torture to you.
You start crying once again, are your hands cover your face and you let it all out.
And that is, until he finally says it.
“oh, I love you so much, noona, fuck… I love you so much.”
Before you can even look at him, he grabs your face and pulls it even closer to his, he takes one of your hands in his hand and guides it towards his crotch.
“Look at what you’ve done to me.”
He presses your hands onto his crotch and you feel his hardness against your hand.
“You’ve no idea how hot you sounded going all crazy… all for me, noona… fuck.. wish I could relive it over and over again..”
“But you have no reason to be insecure, because this heart beats only for you. Like I’ve said before, I was only made to love you.”
Jungkook presses his lips on yours, taking your breath away with how passionate it is, “my noona, my pretty noona.”
You kiss him back immediately and climb up on his lap, he shakes his hands around your body and you feel him shake.
“I love you so much… I love you alot.” He mumbles between your kiss, your fingers play with his hair as he unbottons your shirt impatiently.
“We’re each others forever, mark me noona, so no one can even think of me, without you.” It feels so good to kiss him, to be his embrace.
To hear him confess his undying love for you.
“I just wanted to hear hor much you loved me noona, she cannot ever take your place.. I don’t even remember her name.. I only remember you.”
“We’ll be lovers forever.”
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xpeachesncream · 10 months
Text
seven with you | bands drabble (jjk)
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↳ drabbles masterlist
yours (ft. the bands!couple) | drabble seven: it’s time for jungkook’s solo debut and you have a few feelings about it.
word count: 2.9k
warnings: cussing, mature language, oc experiencing jealousy and insecurity, oc is very supportive but inevitably feels insecure and scared, kook being protective of his family as always, soft and sweet unprotected sex, cowgirl 🤠, making out, neck kisses, sprinkle of breast play, pls excuse any errors as i quickly whipped this up!
a/n: anon, this is for you! 💞 ironically this is my 7th drabble for the couple 😅 hehe coming back to continue feeding into all the thoughts, fantasies, etc etc because of seven promotions. much love, hope you enjoy! so sorry if i missed anyone on my perm taglist, its been so long! i’ll be back again soon 🥰
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"So, what's hyung doing? Is he still at rehearsal?" Kai asks on the other line as you sit on the hotel bed, scrolling through your laptop.
"Yeah, he's still rehearsing for tomorrow."
"Do you know anything about the video?" You chuckle a bit and shake your head as if your little brother can see you.
"Mm, no.. besides who's involved. He wanted to keep it a surprise."
"Interesting." Kai laughs. "You're going in blindly with everyone else."
"I sure am." You laugh. "But, it'll be good! I'll get to experience this with everyone. I know it'll be amazing no matter what."
"How come you didn't wanna be in the video?"
"It's not that, I just always told Kook that he shouldn't let me hinder his process. If he wants me involved, then he can get me involved. If not and he chooses to do his own thing, then I'll sit back and support as I always do."
"Truthfully, did you want to be in the video?"
"I mean.." You hum as you tilt your head to the side. "It would've been cute."
"Then, why did you say no?"
"Kai. I just.. didn't want him to feel obligated. Plus, to be frank, I wasn't even sure if I was comfortable. I think Kook could tell, and he didn't wanna force it after that. Or, maybe he just had a revelation and thought it’d be better off not involving me.” You joke.
"Nothing is better off without you, you know that. But, of course. I get everything else that you’re saying.”
"I trust his process, though. I always do."
"True." He laughs. "Okay, shoot. It's about to release." You keep your eyes on the laptop as the music video starts, keeping your brother on the line as he promised he'd watch with you. He was currently at the Choi residence while you ventured out to New York with Jungkook— supporting him from the sidelines for the beginning of his 'Seven' promotions.
You smile as you see Jungkook and Han So Hee together at the table, praising her for being so beautiful and flawless. You giggle every now and then at Jungkook, but then you start to fix on the little details;
The chase.
His effort— though a bit much that it makes you giggle, the effort is there.
The way he looks at her, waits for her at the end.
Holds her hand and walks along her side.
Maybe you should've said yes to being in the video in the first place, then you wouldn't be in this predicament. Though, she fits well. The vibe is immaculate.
Their dynamic? Strong.
Let's take a moment to be real: part of you felt a little jealous at her flawless execution, a little insecure observing how perfect she is. It seems a bit silly if you generally look at it since Jungkook was Jungkook. But, you couldn't help it. You still weren't used to it, even if you reminded yourself every day that your man was Jeon Jungkook.
Even if you reminded yourself of your story with Jeon Jungkook.
Kai is still on the phone, slightly pulling you back to reality with his comments about how 'good hyung looked in the video' and how 'they worked well together.' He must have been tiptoeing with his words, especially when he quickly flips the script and starts to mention the explicit version that still needed to be listened to.
You follow the lead, playing it on your computer while Kai sat on speaker phone. You can hear the audible gasps coming from his end, your own eyes widening at the switch in the lyrics, the sudden shift of the entire song.
Although you were incredibly proud of Jungkook for continuing to step out of his comfort zone, you felt yourself shrinking and shrinking—
Falling into the never-ending pit of insecurity, jealousy, assumptions, what if's, etc etc.,
It was past midnight. Why was rehearsal taking forever?
Felt like hours, and hours.
"The explicit version— I— Wow. There is a lot to unpack here. But, I can't even say that I'm surprised. Hyung pulls it off well. Wanna be like him some day. He just doesn't care what anybody thinks, and he's so cool." Kai laughs with Yeonjun in the background as they continue to listen to the explicit version with you. You hear a faint 'I don't think this version was meant for us' coming from Yeonjun, a small giggle leaving your lips at their commentary.
"Stop." You say just as Jungkook gives three light knocks on the door before tapping the key against the reader and swinging it open. "Hey, I'll call you back later okay? Jungkook just got back."
"Okay! Tell hyung congrats on the solo debut and that we really liked it!"
"I will. Love you."
"Love you too!" He says as he hangs up the call. Jungkook strolls in with a big smile on his face as he types away at his phone, small giggles leaving his lips as he approaches you on the bed.
"Babygirl." He smiles at and you places a quick kiss on your lips. "Was that Kai?"
"Yeah, it was." You give him a tiny, pursed smile. "He said congrats on the solo debut and that him and his friends really liked everything." Jungkook pauses before he responds because he's typing another message before shoving his phone back into his pocket.
"Aw, thanks. That's my guy. Can always count on him." You let out a tiny laugh before avoiding his eyes, silently looking down at your laptop and letting your finger swipe across the trackpad. "You didn't have to wait up, love."
"Of course I did. I needed to catch it at release." You look up at him briefly. "How was rehearsal?"
"Fucking tiring, but we got through it. I'm excited for everyone to see the performances." He smiles and sits next to you. "So, what'd you think?"
"You two were great together, Kook. It was great.” You simply state.
"We were, weren't we? She was so helpful. And I felt at ease, like I didn't have to try much. She was such a natural at everything, it made things go by a lot smoother.”
"I can tell." You respond softly— probably a little too softly because Jungkook's smile slightly fades. Then, the thoughts start to swarm again just as you look at him. You quickly divert your attention by subtly biting onto your bottom lip, looking towards the hotel window when cars are honking their horns out on the street.
Of course, they were assumptions.
But of course, they were stupid, silly little thoughts stemming from your insecurity; occupying every corner of your brain, making you believe this skewed perception, this-whole-thing-that-is-a-thing-but-not-really-a-thing-because-there-aren't-any-facts-to-back-it-up—
"Hey." He pulls you out of your thoughts by taking your chin and making your eyes meet his own deep, brown orbs. "Talk to me, baby. I can hear you thinking. D-did you not like it? It's okay if not, you know? You can tell me. I value your opinion more than anything"
"What, no!" You shake your head. "I mean, no, of course I loved it. I loved every bit of it. It's amazing, and you know you always blow me away with everything you do." You cup his cheeks and let out a soft sigh. "I really do think you're amazing. I just.. maybe part of me kind of regrets not doing this with you?" He lets out a small breath before taking your hands in his and placing a gentle kiss on your palm.
"Are you saying that just because you saw her in the video?"
"Maybe? And, it did look easy. Everything looked so natural, especially for her. You two meshed well. I—I don’t know. I’m not really sure where I’m going with this anymore."
"Hm." He hums before tapping your thigh and bringing you onto his lap. You brush the hair out of his face while he wraps his arm around your waist, laying a gentle kiss on your cheek. "Baby, you know when I told you about it, I could tell you weren't comfortable with the idea. The last thing I wanna do is make you uncomfortable or unhappy."
"No, I know, Kook. It's not your fault. Trust me. It was beautiful and I really enjoyed it. I just.. felt a bit insecure especially since you didn't push on it. I thought you realized I wouldn’t work. She was way better and you totally saw that. You had this vision with her, and the thought made me feel a bit jealous too. I guess."
"I know this is easier said than done, but don't be. I love you." He brushes the hair away from your face this time. "You don't have to go out of your way to stand out or catch my attention. You don't have to prove anything to me, anyone. Plus, part of me felt kinda dumb for implying the idea knowing how it'd make you feel and how much attention it'd bring."
"What do you mean?"
"I realized it was probably better off this way simply because I didn't want people to paint this picture about us, or to assume our relationship was a certain way. I know there's already lots of things to be said about the video or the song itself, about our story— but at the end of the day, they don't know us like we know us and I'd prefer to keep it that way."
Because even though the relationship is out there, it's not out there. Jungkook tries to keep things balanced, keeping things private as much as possible out of safety— to create boundaries between his professional and private life. He would always put you and Kai first, keeping your safety, your comfortability and your happiness a priority.
Over everything, anything.
The moment he felt your uneasiness while mentioning the video, he retracted. He never wanted to force you, or make you do something that was too out of your comfort zone. He didn't want to cross that line of putting too much out there because he was happy with how things were. It was enough, just enough. And that's all he needed.
You were happy, Kai was happy.
Why would he ever push and ruin that?
"You're right. I understand."
"I hope that helps put you at ease a bit, princess. You can always talk to me about it. There was really no other reason behind me not pushing the idea." He caresses your cheek. "Okay? Nothing else." He kisses your cheek, before your lips. He gently taps the side of your hips before adjusting you on his lap and having you straddle him full on. You wrap your arms around his neck while he stares at you in pure adoration, a smile painted across his lips before he speaks again— "You're my muse. You're in everything that I do, bits of you are sprinkled everywhere. Everywhere that I go, songs that I've created, lyrics scribbled on paper, doodles on my notebook— everything." His hands travel up your sides, giving them a tiny squeeze as he lets out a small exhale against your lips. "You will always be my muse."
"I'm sorry, Jungkook."
"Don't be sorry." He chuckles a bit. "Everything you felt was valid, and I always want you to come to me about these things." You rest your forehead against his.
"I really did enjoy it, though. You always blow me away with everything you do." You kiss him just as you wrap your arms tightly around his neck.
"Yeah?" He chases after your lips, large hands grazing your back as he holds you close to him.
"Mhm." You giggle before poking the tip of his nose. "And uh, the explicit version of the song— we listened to it right before you walked in."
"Cool, huh?" You laugh and shake your head.
"You're crazy."
"You know.." He smirks before biting onto his bottom lip. "Think there's a little bit more explaining I can do for that one. But, I think it'd be better if I showed you."
"Oh?" You watch as Jungkook tears his beanie off and tosses it aside. "I think that'd be good." He leans forward for another kiss— but this time, it's deep. Deep enough for Jungkook to take in a strong inhale through his nose, shakily letting out an exhale once he parts from your lips. He doesn't waste any time before he's kissing you again, tongue swiping against your bottom lip before easing it in. His fingers trace your bare skin underneath your shirt, tips digging into your sides again when he feels you slowly rock against him— his length growing incredibly hard beneath you.
"Yeah, it would be good. Right?" He lets out a small moan in between kisses, hissing when he feels your lips make their way down to his jaw, neck. His hands travel to the hem of the shirt you're wearing, slowly prying it off and tossing it aside. He continues to sit on the edge of the bed while you straddle him, your hands now fiddling with his shirt before he pulls it over his head and joins yours off to the side.
"You aren't tired?" You lay some lazy kisses along his throat, sucking and nipping gently on the surface while his fingers tug at the fabric of your panties.
"Nope, not anymore." You make your way back up to his lips, relishing in every kiss, every squeeze— every bit of Jungkook. Midway, he finally helps you out of your panties before shifting his sweats and boxers down enough to let his cock spring free.  
"You sure?" You tease as you waste no time wrapping your hand around his member, pumping him a few times while listening to him let out a few moans.
"Positive, baby. Need you." He mutters as he signals for you to sink down his length. You do as told, slowly, easily, sinking down until he completely fills you up and bites his bottom lip. "Just like that. Right where you should be."
"Feel so full already, Kook." He chuckles as he adjusts himself better on the bed, tattooed hands traveling up your back, caressing your body, as he showers your tits with kisses. He takes a nipple into his mouth, tongue circling around the hardened peak before pulling back with a pop. Just as you continue to roll against him, he takes the other— giving his tongue a little more freedom to explore before sucking and giving it a quick pop. He continues to shower your chest with feathery kisses, moving to your shoulders and arms while you continue to set the tempo.
"So good— fuck." He moans. "You're doing so good, baby." He tightens his grip around your hips as he continues to praise you. "Just like that." He repeats. You whine, lips grazing his as you work him, ride him— feeling every inch of Jungkook inside of you. The way that your walls engulf him— squeeze him— with every roll of your hips makes it hard for him to hold on. Though, he can tell you're slowly tipping over the edge.
It's the way your face contorts in pleasure.
Your inaudible, silent moans.
The way your body stiffens when you work against him, relishing every bit of his cock before repeating the rhythm.
And he's right, you are close. So close. Jungkook pulls you into a sloppy, wet kiss before he slightly backs away to observe your face, you. He chases after your lips once more, biting onto your bottom lip and making you let out a moan that sounds like music to his ears.
The chase.
His effort.
The way he looks at you in pure adoration, easing you to the edge to see you in pure ecstasy.
Holding you close, keeping his hands on you at all times.
You continue picking up the pace a bit, causing enough friction against your heat. Jungkook calls your name, whispering sweet nothings against your lips as his hand rests on the nape of your neck— the other hand still on your hip. He starts to match your rhythm, your tone, thrusting upwards into you to fully tip you over the edge.
"Kook, I'm— I'm gonna— fuck." You whine as you become desperate, feeling the high settle into the pit of your gut. Finally, you tremble against him and moan loudly against him; hand squeezing his tattooed bicep, the other tangled in his black locks.
"That's it. Good girl." He caresses your back, continuing to thrust himself into you even as you try to come back down from your high. But now, he's there, and he's desperate for his own release. "You're my babygirl. You're everything to me. Everything." You moan loudly with him as he gives you one, two, powerful thrusts. "Everything that I do, everywhere I go. You're my muse. You're mine." He says against your ear, panting as he snaps his hips against you at a faster pace while holding you close; the sound of flesh against flesh filling the room. It's not long before Jungkook is coming undone, the aftershocks still rippling through your body. His cheek is pressed against yours as he pants and lets out a few whines, your walls milking every last bit of him until the very end.
"Kook." You whisper. "I love you. I'm so proud of you and I love you." He laughs lazily as he rubs at your hips.
"I love you too, princess. Good enough explanation for that?"
"Maybe." You giggle as you hop off and scurry off to the bathroom for a quick shower.
"I mean.. we can do more—" He trails behind you and welcomes himself into the shower.
"Jungkook, you need to be up in 3 hours." Your voice echoes in the shower and Jungkook scrunches his nose.
"And?" He laughs. "Running on no sleep is how I work."
"You're too much." You giggle when Jungkook turns you around and wraps his arms around you.
"Baby, baby, baby." He says smugly. "There's more that I'll need to show you, especially for the album."
"Jungkook." You try to scold him but you squeal when he has you wrap your legs around him and presses your back against the tiled wall— the night only leading to more sweet nothings, praises and genuine love. Jungkook loving on you, just as you with him.
Because, you are his muse. You are in everything he does, bits of you sprinkled in everything.
No matter the circumstance. No matter the day, time, year.
You will always be his muse.
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katz-chow · 7 months
Text
deranged!reader & her task force (katz's version)
me & ur mother @moongreenlight are genuinely insane. this is basically us if it even care 😞
a/n: fem!reader all military names fake, processes fake; mostly it'd be classified, not just not done...well we wouldn't know for sure. medical shit also real. i’m in both of those fields irl. no i am not a swifty
clinically insane reader doesn’t rampage kill. art has many mediums; regular people choose acrylics, watercolor, culinary, pottery…reader chooses murder. it’s a meticulous process that depends on the person, it’s slow, drawn out. which makes her a great torturer. thing is, she was part of SEAL team tango-8 but focused more on SARC stuff (search and rescue). she knows her way around a suture kit—and, fortunately, surgical instruments.
laswell knew reader for two reasons: odd separation orders and her confirmed kill count. there was barely anything documented about her medical discharge which was weird because 98% of the military is just paperwork (a fucking pain btw). only thing noted was “medically discharged” and “0% disability”. her confirmed kill count? 43. happy to be back in uniform, she skips around the hallways to price, giving him a giant hug and a kiss on the cheek, whispering threats in his ear. “if you ever discharge me, i’ll dip you in concrete to be my custom statue.” a sickeningly sweet smile follows. as he furrows his brows in confusion and bit of horror.
soap tries really hard to like her and he really does. she's so sweet and always tries to include him in things and bakes him cakes and always somehow includes almonds, joking how it's actually just cyanide. soap laughs until he sees her have actual cyanide in the kitchen, carefully dropping it into the batter with an eyedropper. then a tsp of almond extract. it wasn't enough to hurt or kill anyone, but it scared him
he told ghost and ghost goes and investigates. then he sees reader one night, cleaning her instruments, different mallets, scissors, blades and knife handles etc. and they are pristine...not surgically pristine but definitely floor grade. he continues to watch her at 2100, without fail, and cleans her surgical instruments. until he sees her missing from her barracks from her open curtains. he goes and finds her carefully dressing a man like a buck. she sees him and smiles at him beckoning him closer. after he puts an end to that, with cuts and bruises, he goes and tattles to price. reader crying in the prison about how much she'll "miss her uniform" price and laswell speak about it and they finally know what the fuck us going on. they send her out on the field.
its just gaz, a few recruits, and reader in a safehouse. they've captured one prisoner, a soldier of the pmc against them. he's tied to a chair and after gaz runs over his psychological warfare in him. gaz fails and tiredly beckons for reader to come in. he finds her staring dead straight ahead, looking like she was falling asleep with her eyes wide open. he slowly calls out her name, no response. he calls again, same outcome. he taps her on her shoulder and her eyes fall into a "normal" state and smiles brightly at him, "my turns?!" gaz films it, the blood, the slow agony-per laswell and price's request reader starts to skin the soldier. starting with just a silly little joke about cuticles and then it goes higher and higher, the piece of skin never tearing. it's superficial, it barely draws blood. "does that hurt? don't worry, i'll help!" she blows cold air onto the exposed skin, drying out his flesh slowly while the blood keeps it from fully drying. gaz gulps, the camcorder on a tripod next to him. "it's okay, you're not going to die. and if you do...i'll make use of you, no waste! promise! gaz, can you pass me the kerrison rongeur, please?" gaz scrambles around in her kit, metal and metal clinking together in the heavy duty box. "the fucking hole puncher, gaz." she screams at him, causing him to jump. he finds the long, gun-like instrument, its blade pokes and punches together. he hands it to her, the work end first. she yanks it from him, nails scratching his hand in frustration, but that same smile on her face. she takes small chunks of flesh from the man, blood gushing and pools. she digs dipper until she hits an artery, blood splattering over them all. "the mosquito! give the fucking mosquito." she screams as the man in front of them bleeds out. she launches for it in her box and clamps down. the man half awake. gaz's chest heaves up and down, his face in shock and fearful freeze. reader storms out, face falls flat, no more smile, no brows furrowed, just a dead stare in front of her. "pieces of shit, human bodies are."
laswell pulls out any psych eval documents she can find. she finds exactly one set of documents: your medical discharge. price shows ghost and they stare at the replaying video on his monitor. the image of a wide, blank-eyed reader, hair and face dripping with crimson blood, a small clamp clicked to close an artery. they keep her. soap is the one who finds your bloody kit left in your barracks. chunks of flesh, blood, bone... and other bioburden seemingly never there at all. the shiny chromium finish looking as if they were never used at all. reader who failed out of medical school because of the lack of moral and ethics her professors and physcians saw in her. they banned her from residency.
"can i...have him..? please?" "why would you want an execution order? aren't you an interrogator?" "i want to see the peristalsis!" "the fucking what?" "how his intestines move in his body and squirm around like snakes!!!" she dissects the man in a way only a careful surgeon could. doyen clamps closed off certain sections as she sits and animates the movement on her ipad. the man inhales and exhales evenly, a bandage over his throat, eyes wide and dry from the lack of tears.
soap, as empathetic as he is, sees reader in chow, sitting by herself as she stares dead ahead, mind clouded in thoughts. her arms moves a bit, twiddling her thumbs under the table. he sits down across from her, her gaze staring pass him, face unreadable and almost bored looking. "you alright bonnie?" reader's face smiles, her eyes still dead and still as they lag behind the smile she puts on. her eyes squint. "yeah! why?" "twiddling your thumbs there, anxious about your second mission?" she puts her cupped together hands onto the tabletop. her hands unclasp. she twirls the severed thumbs around. "just a lot on my mind, yeah..."
"can i have it?" reader asks when she sees gaz's shiny teeth.
reader takes interrogations very seriously, taking souvenirs for herself. a finger carefully dried out, teeth, an ear, hair, vital organs in formaldehyde, eyes into earrings, tendons as rings and bracelets.
she gave price a birthday present which included a human heart, dried and shrunk in a glass displayed case. "made it myself", she says. "...on your own time, my love?" "yes, never company time!" his birthday is not public imformation.
ghost was missing a pow. he asks reader. "where is he?" "who?" "the prisoner..." "i let him go." "why the fuck would you do that?" "i'm going hunting, do you want to join? we can dress him in the field!"
"i got you flowers, ghost, for your mother's grave." "how the fuck do you know about that?" "you told me!" "i fucking didn't! now tell me who the fuck told you that shit?!" "you did, don't be silly. you told me over a glass of scotch...or many glasses actually!" she giggles as he slams her against the wall.
price wakes up one night, the spine-chilling feeling of a pair of eyes stalking him. he picks up the gun from his nightstand, clicking off the safety. he blinks a bit, vision clearing and seeing a figure in the shadowy corner. "go back to sle-" her body is slammed against the wall, gun to her head. "go to bed, price." "what...are you doing here?" price breathes out, trying to steady his racing heart, popping the gun back to safety. "wanted a piece of your hair."
gaz finds reader in his room after work one day, reader sweeping his house. he changed the locks within a week, locking all external doors and windows. reader leaves him breakfast every morning still. he trashes it after the cyanide incident. he wakes up to reader with a plate of eggs and toast over his bed. "please eat it and don't waste food :("
the task force lives their day to day lives with the feeling of impending doom, paranoia, and a feeling of dread washing over them all at once whenever they catch a glimpse of you. they beg price to remove you, but price would rather not be covered in cement while still alive.
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