#I really appreciate this compilation of known facts! Despite her being one of the most open characters in the cast we still don’t know much | Explore Tumblr Posts and Blogs

btssaysstudy · 3 years

Text

Cheap Sunglasses || jjk

Pairing: Jeon Jungkook (BTS) x reader

Note: Inspired by cheap sunglasses by John K || do let me know if you liked it :)

Summary: Being a teaching assistant for college definitely has it monetary perks but who knew it had other perks in meeting a potential significant other.

Warnings: swearing, mentions of injury (not the reader), angst, jungkook being an annoying player at times, mentions of over-exhaustion from schoolwork

“Thanks y/n!” Mingyu grinned, reaching out for a fist bump. You laughed, returning the gesture. “No problem, just doing my job.”

“I’ll treat you for a meal soon, you can count on it! I’ll see you around!” He gave you a quick side hug before leaving the lecture hall. You got up from your seat, packing your belongings to head off for lunch.

“y/n! Could you help me compile the outline for the chapters to read for the semester?” Your professor approached you, handing you the list of chapters that class had to read. “Sure, when do you need it by?”

“Preferably by the end of this week? No rush! As long as it’s before midterms.”

“Okay, sure!” You glanced at the list, it was the same reading list as last semester, you just had to use your own outline for this semester. You smiled, thankful that nothing much changed with the syllabus so you had less work to do as a teaching assistant.

Your professor thanked you and left the hall. “You know, one definite perk of being a TA is tutoring hot students. Mingyu was definitely hitting on you.”

“No he’s not. We’re friends, I already met him for one of my classes last semester.”

“Mm, yea don’t believe you. Anyway, let’s hurry go, I’m starving.” Sooyoung rubbed her stomach and you grabbed your bag, leaving the hall with your friends.

One definite perk, which was not what Sooyoung said, of being a TA was that you get paid and you definitely needed the money. It was tough to juggle being a TA at first and you weren’t sure if you were cut out for it, but 2 semesters later, you’ve been a TA every semester and it’s become a part of your schedule.

“Chan-mi!” A loud bright voice called out for other friend. The three of you stopped, turning around to find the boy who was dubbed as the “sunshine” of your college.

“Yes?” Chan-mi clearly unfazed by his loudness. Hoseok grinned, saying a brief hello to you and Sooyoung. “Our club manager just texted me that we have an upcoming gig. Just a little insider info for you, you’re on the performing team.”

Chan-mi nodded her head with a short laugh, “He texted me too actually.”

“What?! I thought i’ll be the good news bearer.” Hoseok pouted, his group approached him, patting him on the shoulder to rush him for lunch.

“I’ll see you at next practice then!” Chan-mi waved goodbye as he was being dragged away by his friends.

His friends. That group.

That group was popular and they knew it. They don’t seem to bask in it but they would slip some of the times — easily charming people to get what they need, having girls praying that they’ll become their girlfriends. It was no surprise that they have quite a list of girls they dated.

Despite the list,their reputation wasn’t that bad. They would make it clear to the girls they take out on dates — that they’re not looking to commit. You figured it was the least they could to do the poor girls who were pining for them, laying out the facts immediately.

“So what are we eating? I’m about to die any second.” Sooyoung grumbled once more.

—

“If you’d like to book my TA, I’ve sent you an email with a google sheet for you to find a slot. She’s a popular one so better book a slot asap if you need her help.” Your professor announced to the class, making you feel shy from her comment, your eyes glued to your screen as you felt the stares.

You’d be lying if you said you didn’t know that you were a popular TA. You did put in the effort to help others since you were being paid after all, so, you did deserve the credit.

Throughout class, you could do your own things since you didn’t need to pay attention to the lesson. Halfway through the class, you clicked on the google sheet link to see that your upcoming week has been almost fully booked.

‘maybe i need a pay raise’ you thought to yourself, opening your own calendar to update your own schedule. Your eyes landed on a particular name, shocked that he even bothered to book a slot.

Jeon Jungkook.

You stopped yourself from whipping your head around to find him. He was part of that group and known to be the very athletic one. You guessed you stereotyped him to be those athletes that didn’t care about studies. You felt slightly uneasy, knowing his reputation in college and the girls.

‘It’s okay, it’s just one time slot.’

Once you noted the ones who booked a time slot with you the upcoming week, you contacted each of them to settle the venue & confirm the timing.

We can meet at my place :) - Jungkook

Yea, I’m not entirely comfortable going to a stranger’s place - y/n

Relax, it was a joke. How about near your place? So you don’t have to travel so much. - Jungkook

That works fine, there’s a cafe near mine. I’ll text you the address later. - y/n

Once class ended your two friends rushed to your seat. “So how’s your schedule Ms. Popular?”

“Really busy.”

“I saw the sheet, Jeon Jungkook booked a slot with you? Perks of being a TA is definitely helping cute students.” Sooyoung giggled like a little pre-teen girl.

“You don’t even need to be a TA to get cute guys, you have so many admirers.” Chan-mi made a very true remark.

“I’ll admit, you’re not wrong. But y/n’s snagging boys of a different league.”

“Stop idolising them like they’re gods.”

“They’re looks are god-like.” Sooyoung countered.

“You’re unbelievable.”

—

“Hey,” someone tapped your shoulder, taking out your earpiece to greet Jungkook. “Hey.”

He was dressed in a typical tired college student, in grey sweats and a black hoodie. Yet, you had to admit he looked cute in them.

“Sorry, did I make you wait long?”

“Oh no, I just came early to make sure we get a good spot. Not too near the rest of the customers.”

“I see you want a little privacy.” Jungkook grinned cheekily, clearly implying something else. You raised a questioning eyebrow at him, “Sorry, just kidding.” He quickly apologised, taking the seat opposite you.

“Anyway, we can just begin immediately. Do you have any questions?”

Jungkook nodded his head, taking out his laptop. “I do actually. Quite a long list if you don’t mind.”

“Well you have me for an hour. Go ahead.”

Throughout the 2 hours, you realised you really stereotyped him a great amount. You assumed he barely paid attention in class but he did — he even had a list of questions to ask. You honestly enjoyed helping these type of people the most, those that made their own effort to help themselves.

“You know,” Jungkook spoke, coming back from ordering his drink. “For the past hour and a half, I gotta admit, I stereotyped you to be a super uptight and socially awkward person. Then again, having to help tutor a lot of people would need social skills as well.”

With a chuckle, you shrugged your shoulders, “I stereotyped you too, so I guess we’re both guilty.”

Curious, Jungkook rested his weight on his arms as he leaned closer to you, “Oh really? What did you stereotype me as then?” A playful smirk clearly threatening to appear on his lips.

“A dumb jock.” You mischievously grinned back at him, his smile dropped, clearly not expecting that answer. It felt good to bruise that ego of his, even if it was just a split second. “Since I’m asking you to tutor me, I’m not gonna argue that.” He leaned back, regaining his composure and confidence.

You could feel his entire presence exuding with confidence, though he did have something to be confident about. In fact, he had a few things to be confident about - athletically gifted, popular and handsome. Anyone would call you a liar if you said you didn’t think he was handsome.

“If you don’t have anymore questions, we can wrap this up now.”

Jungkook nodded his head, “Thanks for helping me. Appreciate it.” He reached out his hand, offering a handshake. “A handshake?”

“Are you afraid of a little physical contact?” He teased.

Rolling your eyes, you reached out to give him a firm shake. “Glad I could help you.” He gave you a cute bunny smile, grabbing his things and leaving you behind in the cafe. You stayed for a few more minutes before heading back to your place to prepare dinner for your guests.

Cooking always seemed to make time pass by quickly because before you even realised, your friends were spamming your doorbell, rushing you to let them in. “How was he?” Sooyoung questioned the moment she entered your house.

“I had a good day thank you.” You sarcastically replied, grabbing a cup for them. “He was alright, he actually came prepared with questions.”

“That’s surprising. I honestly thought he booked a slot just to flirt with you.” Chan-mi commented as she helped you set up the dining table. “Come on, he wouldn’t waste his time on me.”

“Why not? You’re a great catch.” Sooyoung argued.

“Pretty sure I give off the vibe of “date to settle” and not “date for the fun”. So obviously, he won’t even bother.”

“Mm, you do have a point for that.”

“Anyway, enough about my tutees, let’s just enjoy girls night.” You raised your shot glass of soju, Sooyoung grinned excitedly, “Cheers to us”

As every week’s slot was released in the online sheet, Jungkook was always one of the first few to book. You couldn’t help but be surprised every time you saw his name on the schedule.

“So you picked up the sport by accident?” You clarified again as you took another sip. Jungkook nodded his head, leaning back into his chair. “Seokjin was the one who wanted to learn it, he dragged me to the trial class and the rest was history. He takes credit for it.” He laughed, a reminiscing look on his face.

“From your stories, you guys seem like brothers.” You watched an endearing smile creep onto his face, “They really do seem like it.”

His phone started vibrating and he checked the caller ID before sighing, silencing the call. You furrowed your eyebrows together, “What’s with that annoyed look?”

Jungkook shook his head, running his fingers through his hair, “Nothing much, just someone I went out with a week ago.”

“Trouble in paradise?” You joked.

“There’s no paradise. It was just a date, nothing more to it.” He nonchalantly dismissed it. You felt a bit offended of how casual he was treating their feelings. “If you don’t want to, you don’t have to go out with them, you know? You’re just giving them false hope.”

Jungkook sat upright, “That’s not true. I clearly tell them that I don’t mind going out on a date but that’s nothing. Nothing more than a date out. So it’s on them for still going for it.”

You sighed, “But you already know these people are dating you and hoping that they’ll be the one who will change your mind about the idea of commitment.” Jungkook shrugged, “Maybe that’ll happen one day.”

Narrowing your eyes at the boy in front you, you wondered if that was what he had been secretly hoping for whenever he went out with these girls. “Do you want that to happen? Is that why you’re more than glad to go out on dates?”

He didn’t answer immediately, staring at you as if he was thinking of a reply. Clearing his throat he adjusted his sitting position, “I didn’t say that. I just said maybe it’ll happen.”

“Yea but are you hoping for it to happen?”

Jungkook casted a soft glare, “Okay enough about my love life. How about you? Aren’t you single as well?”

You leaned back, nodding your head, “Yea, what about it?”

“Well, why aren’t you attached?”

Pressing your lips into a thin line as you thought carefully of your answer. “Unlike you, I date to settle.” Jungkook jutted out his bottom lip, internalising your reply as he nodded his head in response. “Interesting. You’ll probably click well with Jimin.”

“Your friend Jimin?”

“Yea, he has the same thought as you. Always nagging at me about the same thing you just did.” Jungkook chuckled to himself, shaking his head as he recalled the countless times Jimin was talking about Jungkook’s active love life.

“He’s right you know… Doesn’t it get lonely always meeting different people?”

There was a short pause in the conversation, Jungkook’s eyes shifting away, his gaze fixed on the table. “To be honest, yea. But at the same time it’s what keeps me from feeling lonely. Doesn’t make sense, I know.”

You smiled, “It’s cool, I kinda get it. But after our numerous study sessions together, I’m certain you deserve to be in a good relationship.”

Jungkook shrugged, “Thanks but I don’t think I’m cut out for it.”

Confused, you questioned for an explanation. Jungkook’s eyes wandered around as he thought of a response. The athlete randomly took out his pair of shades. “Are the shades part of your answer or something?”

“It’s cheap.”

“Okay?” Your response sounded for confused, wondering if he was trying to change the topic. If he was, it was a very weird way.

“I buy the cheap ones because I know i’m going to lose them sooner or later. Can’t keep the good ones. That’s how I feel about my love life. Sometimes it feels like I can’t have nice things.”

“Man.” You breathed out, leaning back into your seat. “That’s a great analogy and all but don’t be so bleak. Between the two of us? You’re probably going to be first one who gets into a solid relationship.”

Jungkook chuckled, “Thanks for the faith TA. Do you have the same amount of faith in me for this module?”

You pursed your lips jokingly, “I think you’ll need more consultations for the same level of faith.” Breaking into a chuckle right after and so did Jungkook.

The popular athlete reached out his tattooed hand once again, for a handshake. By then, you were used to this gesture, chuckling as you reached across the table to shake his hands. “Tell you what, let’s take a pause on tutoring. You should meet the rest.”

“The rest as in your group?”

“Yea,” He stood up, throwing his backpack over his shoulder and stuffed his hands in his sweatpants’ pockets. You liked his laid-back look, he always wore that similar style whenever he was meeting you and you assumed it was to get comfortable enough to study.

“Are you going to keep staring at me?” Jungkook smirked. You rolled your eyes, standing up to get your bag. “Come on, don’t be so mean to me.” He playfully pouted and he looked cute. You felt yourself feel shy just from that, “I am not.”

“Yes you are, you always mock me or insult me. Where’s my compliment?”

You pursed your lips, bringing your finger to your lips as you pretended to ponder. “You’re doing well with this class.”

Unsatisfied, he grumbled, “That’s not a compliment.”

“Of course it is.” You grinned cheekily at him, patting his shoulders. “But alright, you look cute in sweats.” Even though you clearly sounded nonchalant, your heart was racing from admitting that and you hoped that your face wasn’t getting hot. You kept your composure, and made the first move to leave the cafe.

You realised that you didn’t know where you were going to meet his friends, “Oh yea, where are we going?” You turned around to see Jungkook still standing in place. He cleared his throat and adjust his bag strap. “R-Right, just follow me.”

You didn’t want to tease him further but you clearly saw a pink hue on his cheeks. “Cute.” You muttered to yourself as he led the way.

—

“You want a snack? My treat, for all the tutoring you’ve been giving me.”

“Jungkook, you don’t have to—“

“Okay I’ll get you your usual.” He winked at you before heading off to the counter. You smiled to yourself, watching his figure walk away. You continued on your own work as you waited for him to come back.

Jungkook happily came back as if he won a prize. “Guess who just got free cake? We did!” Jungkook cheered, pushing his stuff aside to make way for the food. “Free cake? Why?”

“So the lady who we always see here apparently owns this place. She’s at the counter today and she randomly gave me this cake for us to celebrate Valentine’s Day.”

Confused, you looked at your calendar. “Oh, it’s Valentine’s Day.” “yea it is, didn’t you know?” “Clearly didn’t.” You shrugged, “But you should’ve told her we’re not together. I feel bad for the free cake.”

“No no, you should feel flattered she called us a cute couple. It means you’re cute.” Jungkook’s body froze for a moment realizing what he had just said. You laughed, “Yea right. Good joke, kook.”

Jungkook frowned, “I’m not joking. I think you’re cute.”

You pointed your pen in his direction, “You know, when I was young I heard that cute meant adorable but ugly.”

“That’s obviously not what I mean. You’re not ugly, that’s for sure.” Jungkook argued without hesitation. You felt flustered this time, retracting your pen. “T-Thanks, I guess.”

The two of you not only spend weekly 2h sessions together, but also became “study buddies”. Jungkook was unsurprisingly super concentrated whenever he started studying. You realised it was his character to always give it his all even if it was something he wasn’t too fond of — like studying. You also noticed his eyebrows would furrow as he tried to comprehend the materials, or sigh and scold himself whenever he found himself stuck.

He had a lot of endearing habits while studying, you couldn’t help but smile every time you noticed it.

“It’s Valentine’s Day, why aren’t you on a date today?”

“Because we arranged a study session today.” Jungkook answered as if it was so obvious.

“It’s just one day of not studying, you could’ve just told me. Plus, I’m sure many girls were hinting you to ask them out.”

“You’re not wrong about that.” He smugly answered and it made you feel a tinge of jealousy that Jungkook saw these girls as “date potential” while you were just his “study buddy”. “Tone down your ego—“

“But I’d rather study with you than go out on a date.”

You found yourself speechless, not knowing how you should be replying to that. Sensing that you were lost for words, Jungkook smiled, “Did I just take your breath away?”

“Shut up.” You snapped out of it, throwing your pen at him.

—

Hey y/n! Sorry i’ll be a bit late later, at the clinic so it might take a while before I’m let off! - jk

Are you sick? We can just reschedule! - y/n

No no! Just sprained my ankle during practice, that’s all! - jk

that’s all?! you’re not traveling today. what’s ur address? i can go over instead - y/n

You bit your lip, wondering if you were overstepping by insisting that and quickly sent another text.

if you’re alright w that of course - y/n

sure i just didn’t want to suggest it in case you weren’t, i’ll text u my address in a bit! - jk

On your way to his place, you felt nervous but you shrugged it off, blaming it on your usual ‘first house visit jitters’ — just like any other time you visited a place for the first time. Or so you told yourself. You ignored that feeling as you rang the doorbell, waiting for the injured athlete to answer the door.

“Hey.” Jungkook greeted you with a smile. You took a good look at his casted ankle, his weight resting on his crutch. A wince crept on your face, “Ouch, looks bad.”

“Thank you for asking, I feel fine.”

You stepped in, eyes taking your time to wander around his place. It was cozy, not cluttered as you had assumed. Jungkook pointed to the table placed by the window, well-lit for a good place to study or to wind down and have a meal. “Nice place.”

“Thanks. Didn’t have much time to tidy up the place before you came.”

“It’s alright, looks neat to me.” Your eyes glanced back down to his ankle, “Are you sure you want to have this session today? I feel like you should be resting—“

“You’re already here. I can take a little revision. Don’t underestimate me.” He teased, gently shoving your shoulder. With a light laugh, you nodded and sat down at the table. You watched Jungkook as he tried to find a comfortable position for himself, especially with his injury. Dropping his crutch on the floor, he settled down quickly to begin the session.

“So how do I know which case to use?”

“It depends on the scenario prof sets for finals. Just a tip, prof loves answers that argues both sides. So, it’s best if you argue with both cases but conclude with which is more relevant or stronger for the scenario.”

Jungkook nodded his head, his bottom lip jutted out once again as he took down your response in his notes. “Thanks, I’m glad I started consultations with you since the beginning of the semester. I would be drowning will all these laws and cases if I didn’t.”

“I’m sure you would’ve managed fine. Your friends are managing well too. Jimin’s pretty good with this module.” You made an off-handed comment about Jimin as you started to pack up your belongings. You failed to catch the slight furrow in his eyebrows and that irritated twitch in the corner of his lip at the mention of Jimin. He knew you two would match well, which he should be happy for Jimin, but instead, he felt annoyed that Jimin was having consultations with you.

He couldn’t help but ask, “He meets you too?”

“Oh yea,” You nodded, your eyes still not meeting his as you scrolled through your schedule, “He meets me lesser than you though, just once a week.”

Just once a week. He repeated your reply. That was enough to get close to you. Hell, he meets you three times a week almost every week. One would question if he really needed that many consultations a week. Jungkook would argue against that, defending that he needed it. But deep down inside, he knew he was lying.

You thought the same. Chan-mi and Sooyoung would make remarks on why Jungkook needed three sessions a week, hinting that he just wanted to find excuses to meet you. You would deny it every time, saying that he would always come prepared for each session with questions, proving that he really took those sessions seriously. But just like Jungkook, you too had a feeling that it wasn’t true.

“Anyway, hope your ankle gets better soon. I better give you time to rest.” You checked the time on your phone. Jungkook did the same time, quick to respond, “Do you want to stay for dinner? I’m going to be ordering delivery anyway. You know... With my ankle. You could have dinner before you leave.” He shrugged his shoulders, trying to be casual about it. Jungkook wasn’t sure what was making him particularly nervous to suggest that. He normally wasn’t nervous with his dates. Why was he nervous around you when it was not even a date to begin with?

You contemplated, imagining your schedule in your mind. The pause made him grow nervous, “You don’t have to—“

“I’m down for dinner. My schedule’s not too busy tonight.” You smiled, settling your bag down back on the chair. Jungkook returned an eager grin. “My treat. For coming all the way here to tutor me.”

“Enough with the treats—“

“No negotiations on this one. I really owe you for traveling here, especially on such a last minute notice.” Jungkook shook his head, scrolling through the list of possible food options.

“Alright, thanks kook.”

That nickname made his lips tug upwards as he tried to fight the smile. “No problem. What do you want to have?”

—

Dinner didn’t take long to arrive, you helped him collect the delivery and set it out on the coffee table. Jungkook had convinced you to watch a movie with him while waiting for dinner. Sinking yourself back onto the couch, the two of you happily enjoyed dinner while watching the movie he had chosen.

“That’s cute.” You commented as the credits rolled. The movie was a short light one and it helped the both of you de-stress from the upcoming finals season. You really needed that self-care.

“Thanks for the dinner and movie. I honestly needed it. Haven’t had much time to wind down lately.”

“Too busy with your consultations?”

You nodded your head, letting out a long sigh. “Yea, don’t get me wrong. It’s rewarding helping others, especially with the pay. But it’s just during this killer period that makes me regret it.”

Jungkook frowned, sitting upright, “I’m sorry I keep booking you.”

You chuckled, “Don’t be sorry. That is my job anyway. Plus, you’re always prepared for the sessions. I hate sessions when they don’t even know why they booked it. Drives me mad.”

Jungkook hummed, agreeing with you. “That must suck.”

“Yea,” your eyes trailed back down to his ankle once again. “What happened with your ankle anyway?”

“Training today. It’s been tough as well for me. Coach has been increasing the intensity and we don’t really get enough rest with studies as well. I wasn’t in the greatest condition today so I slipped.”

“Yikes. Hope it heals fast though.” You smiled cheekily, “Do I get to sign it?”

Jungkook laughed, “That’s so childish. No one signs casts anymore.”

“Please? I’ve never done it before!” You pouted, doing your best to convince him to let you vandalize his cast. You didn’t need to do much to convince him, he was willing to give in pretty much from the first time you brought it up. “A-Alright. Just don’t draw a dick or something.”

You hummed, feigning consideration. “I wasn’t planning to but now that you mentioned it...”

He glared, grabbing his throw pillow to toss it at your face. “Don’t you dare.”

“I was kidding.” You laughed, rushing to the table to grab a pen, sitting back down close to him to draw on his cast.

Don’t flunk my module.

“Done!” You added an “A+” next to it, willing yourself to not draw a heart which you almost did. You pulled away from the cast, looking at your work proudly. Jungkook snorted, “Don’t flunk my module? I won’t. Definitely not after all our sessions together.”

“You better.” You turned to look at him, suddenly aware of how close your faces were next to each other. You watched his gaze drop to your lips before flickering up to meet yours, “May I...?”

You nodded slightly, overcome by the adrenaline and fluttery feeling that was consuming you. You both leaned in, gently kissing each other, making sure you don’t put so much weight against him to avoid hurting his injury. Jungkook’s hand found your waist as he pulled you in, the other cupping your cheek. With your arms snaking around his neck, you both deepened the kiss.

Something in you snapped and made you pull away abruptly. “I-I’m sorry. We shouldn’t have done that.” You quickly got up to take your belongings.

“W-Wait, what do you mean—“ Jungkook called after you, struggling to get up fast with his crutch.

“You’re just going to end whatever we’ll have if we try. We’re looking for different things remember?” You rubbed the nape of your neck, “L-Look, could we just pretend this didn’t happen? I don’t want anything to be awkward between us.”

“W-Wait but...” Jungkook sighed, noting how resolute you were with your suggestion. “If that’s what you want.”

“Thanks Jungkook... Anyway, I should probably go. Get well soon.” You shifted your bag on your shoulder and sent yourself out the door.

After that incident, your schedule you had planned went down the drain. Your brain was foggy and your focus out the window the entire night as you kept thinking about that kiss. How it felt and how happy you felt. But you also reminded yourself that Jungkook was not looking to settle and you didn’t want to put yourself through that.

You just hoped things would be the same after that day.

—

I’m guessing the usual cafe? :) - jk

Where else would we go? - y/n

Maybe my place? - jk

Good try - y/n

Worth a shot - jk

You couldn’t help but smile to yourself every time you conversed with him. Your usual 2h slot with him would drag on if you didn’t have anything that day. It wouldn’t drag on because of questions, you two would just be talking and enjoying each other’s presence. Ever since you met his friends, you met him more outside your 2h slot with him. Though, it was always off-campus.

The incident at his place was as if it didn’t even happen. As if it was just a wet dream of Jungkook. You were thankful he stuck to the agreement and acted as if nothing happened. However, a part of you felt that it was the wrong move.

You look great today btw - jk

But that doesn’t mean you look bad on other days - jk

Just extra great today - jk

Feeling that familiar fluttery feeling in your heart, you chose to ignore the message, promptly closing your chat. You reminded yourself about their reputation with relationships, they weren’t into a serious commitment. You didn’t want to waste your own time either. For some reason you could feel someone staring at you and you could bet anyone 10 bucks that it was Jungkook.

After that moment, class went by fast and it was finally time for lunch. “Y/n! Do you want to grab lunch sometime this week? I promised I’ll be treating.” Mingyu flashed a very charming smile that made you smile back automatically. Behind him was Sooyoung and Chan-mi approaching you.

“You really don’t have to treat me, I’m just doing my job—“

“I insist, yn. I still owe you for carrying me on your back last semester for the other class.” He chuckled. “Come on, you pulled your own weight.” You shook your head with a laugh. You glanced at your two friends who were patiently waiting for you and possibly eagerly eavesdropping. Just as you were about to turn away, Jungkook’s group walked behind them.

You could’ve sworn that you made eye contact when you gave him a smile to which he coldly ignored, looking away and leaving the hall with his friends.

“We can go for lunch but you’re not treating me.”

Mingyu reached out to pat your shoulder, “We’ll see! I’ll get you again soon!” He winked at you and headed off. Your two giddy best friends reached out to pull you along with them. “Is that a date?”

“N-No it’s not!”

“Why are you stuttering?” Chan-mi teased, poking your sides. You took a few steps in front of them, turning around to face them as you walked backwards. “I swear it’s not a date. We’re just friends.”

“Alright, alright, now walk properly before you hurt yourself Miss-I-have-a-date-with-Mingyu.” Sooyoung turned you around by your shoulders. Just as she strongly whipped you around, your eyes met with Jungkook’s.

Your mouth opened to say hi but nothing happened when he once again, looked away, not acknowledging your presence. “Hey y/n!” Jimin happily greeted you, pulling you in for a hug. “Thanks for tutoring me yesterday.”

“No problem, just doing my job.” You grinned at him but your thoughts still on Jungkook ignoring you.

Jimin chuckled, ruffling your hair, “You’re cute when you’re humble. Anyway, see you around!” You said bye to the others, noting that Jungkook didn’t say a single word to you. It was as if you weren’t right in front of you and you felt offended.

“Did something happen between you and Jungkook?”

“No, nothing happened.” You denied as the memory of the kiss flashed in your mind.

“Are you sure?” Chan-mi questioned and you sighed. “Sorry, can we not talk about him? Let’s just have lunch.”

You didn’t notice your two friends sharing a look before collectively agreeing to drop the topic.

—

“Hey.”

“You’re late.” You commented, staring at your screen as you continued your assignment. “Yea sorry, I was on a date with someone and it kinda over ran.”

Oh. A date with someone. “O-Oh, how did it go?”

“Pretty well.” Jungkook took a sit, taking out his laptop, ready to fire his questions. “That’s good!” you sounded happy for him. You weren’t sure if your eyes were just trying to make you feel better but it was as if Jungkook seemed disappointed with your reply, as if he was hoping for a different reaction.

“Yea... Anyway, I don’t have much questions today so it should be a fast one. If you want, we could go get an early dinner?”

“I don’t think I can... I have quite a lot of things to do today.”

“Oh... That’s cool.”

Moving on from the topic, you two went through the questions he had smoothly though there was something nagging at the back of your mind. Why was he so cold towards you that day? Why is he acting as if he wasn’t being such a dick towards you that day?

“You good?”

“Hmm?” You glanced up to see genuine concerned eyes that made your heart flutter once again. “Y-Yea I’m good.”

“You sure? You seem quite out of it today. Are you unwell? Is something bothering you?”

You shook your head, getting frustrated. “Why were you ignoring me today in school?”

“W-What?” Jungkook pulled away, taken aback by your question. You sighed, “You know what I’m talking about.”

Jungkook shook his head, “I was just having a bad morning.”

“A bad morning.” You scoffed, “Right, so a bad morning would make you ignore my entire presence. I’ll take mental note of that.” Jungkook himself got annoyed, crossing his arms as he countered, “You didn’t seem to care about anyone else either when you were chatting up with Mingyu. Didn’t think my moody morning would even be noticed by you.”

You blinked a couple times, processing what he had just said. “W-What? I was just talking with him. Why are you even bringing this up?”

He didn’t answer this time, sighing as he packed his laptop in his bag. “I’m sorry, I can’t do this.” Jungkook got up and so did you. “You can’t do this? Are you jealous or something?”

“What? Of course not.” Jungkook frustratedly ruffled his hair. Not wanting to cause a scene at the cafe, you took your own stuff, chuckling dryly to yourself. “Well, you need to sort out whatever shit’s going on with you. I’m not here to guess how you’re feeling.”

“You’re not here to guess?” Jungkook whisper-yelled. “You were the one who suggested to ignore what happened. I’m here trying to keep my shit together because of that.”

“Jungkook, look. Let’s not talk about it here. Can we just drop it please?” ”Whatever.”

You walked away, not looking back to see Jungkook’s regretful look on his face.

—

Jungkook didn’t contact you after that day and you didn’t want to contact him either. Jimin, on the other hand, was trying to find out what happened between the two of you.

“He always shuts the conversation down the moment one of us brings you up.”

You sighed, “Nothing serious happened.”

“If that’s true, you guys wouldn’t be ignoring each other like the plague again. I had to lie to him about where I am today.”

A part of you, admittedly, would want Jungkook to reach out to you to just come clean about snapping at you the other day. You couldn’t understand how he could go on a date and then get pissed that you were talking to Mingyu.

“You shouldn’t have lied to him.”

“It’s nothing.” Jimin shook his head, “What really happened between you two?”

Defeated, you told Jimin what happened that day at the cafe. “You two are just plain stupid. That poor boy likes you. You like him. Case solved.”

“If that’s true, he wouldn’t have gone on a date right before meeting me.”

“Yes, I agree that part’s fucked up. He just sucks at admitting his feelings to himself. Don’t worry, I’ll sort him out for you.” Jimin draped his arms around your shoulder, “you can count on me to give him a good nagging.”

“Thanks Jimin but you don’t have to do that—“

“Jimin? Y/N?”

The two of you turned around, Jimin immediately retracting his arm when you saw Jungkook standing right behind you. “Oh Kook!”

“I thought you said you’re meeting your Tinder date.”

“R-Right about that—“

“No, forget it, it’s clear who’s your Tinder date. Enjoy.” Jungkook shut him down and walked pass the both of you. Jimin sighed, “Looks like it’s time for me to fix this mess.”

“I think he’ll beat you up if you go after him. I’ll talk to him. You’re right, we need to talk.” Jimin gave you an encouraging smile, patting your shoulders, “Good luck.”

You needed that.

You hurriedly followed after him, calling out to him to stop and wait for you. It wasn’t that hard to catch up to him with his injury as well.

Jungkook looked hurt and cold, as if he was building up his wall against you. “We weren’t on a date. Jimin didn’t want to tell you that he’s meeting me because apparently you get pissed every time you hear my name. I swear.”

“You don’t need to explain anything—“

“Yea of course I don’t, because I should just leave it to you to make wild assumptions every time some shit happens. I don’t get it. One moment, I think you may like me and the next moment you’re out on a date with someone else. Just tell me what is it and we can stop having this misunderstanding.”

Jungkook ruffled his hair, looking around the campus. “Can we talk somewhere else? And not here in public?”

You gestured with your hands, asking him to lead the way. Jungkook led you to a more secluded area, not too far away from where you bumped into him. You both couldn’t take walking together without clearing things up.

Jungkook didn’t waste any time, immediately diving straight into it. “I do like you. Hell, there’s nothing to even doubt especially after that night. I wanted to kiss you for so long. I never admitted that to myself until that very moment. But then you said you wanted to drop everything and I thought it was just in the heat of the moment for you so I agreed. I rather be friends than back to strangers.” Jungkook breathed, taking a short pause, “But then I see you with Mingyu, with Jimin, and I know these men are your type. The ones that settle down with the right partner. The ones that don’t go on many dates. But that’s been me. So i figured you regretted it when you said that i didn’t want the same things you wanted. But fuck, i want to settle down with you. Take things slow, see where the future takes us. Three sessions with you was over the top for my studies but I did it because I love our time together. I love studying with you, going off topic and talking about other things. I love teasing you just to see your reaction because it makes me smile. I love it when you tease me back just to annoy me. You annoy me but I love it.” He sighed, looking at the floor before meeting your watery eyes.

“But I know I’m not the type of guy you’re looking for. You made it clear yourself that night when you asked to drop it. So there. That’s why I went on that date before meeting you. Because I was so nervous about seeing your face, I needed to get my mind off of you. I admit, I’m sorry for doing that because that just further proves your point about me.” He trailed off, as the realization sinks in of how he had just fucked up his own chances of being with you.

You didn’t bother interrupting him at all, your heart pounding loudly against your chest as you took in every single word he said. Your brain and heart having a civil war with each other. Not knowing what should your next move be.

“I’m guessing silence means I’m right.” He spoke after receiving no response from you. “I’ll see you around. Take care of yourself.” He gave a pained smile as he headed off back to his place.

Your knees felt weak as you leaned back against the wall that was hiding the both of you from the others. Your hand brought up to your heart.

What were you going to do?

With a heavy heart, you made your way back to your place. As you settled your dinner, you aimlessly browsed through the shows on Netflix as Your mind was busy thinking about Jungkook’s confession.

Why didn’t you go after him? Why didn’t you say anything? Were you scared that it was all words? Were you scared of ruining the friendship you two had established? What was stopping you from doing what you wanted?

You knew you couldn’t leave things there. You had to do something before you regret. You liked Jungkook. A lot. You were willing to take the risk with him. Just as he was as willing to prove to you that he’s serious.

You reached out for your phone and key, making your way out the door and to where you needed to be.

Once you had arrived, you were knocking on the door profusely, “Jungkook!” You called out.

The door opened, “W-What are you doing here—“

“I like you too. You’re wrong. I don’t regret that night. I regret saying that we should forget about it. Because i couldn’t. I didn’t. I thought about it everyday. I’m willing to take things slow with you if you’re willing. I don’t want to regret this as well.”

The smile on his face grew as you admitted your own feelings to him, Jungkook pulling you in with his free hand as the other still held on to his clutch.

“I mean it as well. I have zero intentions to play around with you. I’m serious and I’ll prove it. I’m not going to lose you, you’re not cheap sunglasses to me.”

“I trust you.” You said with a laugh, recalling his metaphor as his grin only grew wider. “You just made me a really happy man.”

“Really? I couldn’t tell with that wide grin on your face.”

“You’re annoying.” Jungkook said with no malice in his tone as he leaned in for a kiss. Both of you had been wanting to do that again ever since that incident. Your leg kicking the door shut as you pulled yourself closer to him.

“I could get used to this.” You smiled as you pulled away.

“Well, you should. I’m going to be kissing you for a long time.”

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demetriandelibinaryboyfriends · 3 years

Note

Can you talk about autistic Hawk/Eil

Sure, I’d love to!!!

Credit where credit is due, of course--I got a lot of my Autistic Eli headcanons from @jackonthelongwalk, who’s got a little more authority to speak on the subject since he’s actually autistic and whatnot. I mainly just saw his takes and was like “THOSE ARE GOOD TAKES” and adopted all of them XD Although I DID come up with a few of my own headcanons!!! I’ll just compile everything here.

~Eli tends to be pretty particular about physical touch, and a lot of the time he doesn’t really like it. Over the years, Demetri’s found that one type of touch that Eli’s okay with is shoulder-squeezing, and it kinda becomes their thing. Typically Demetri giving Eli a quick shoulder squeeze helps comfort him and makes him feel safe by basically reassuring him “I’m here for you, I’ve got your back.” You can see Demetri give Eli a shoulder squeeze in 2x09 when he’s comforting him about Moon, and he does the EXACT same one in the school fight in 2x10 just before kicking him into the trophy case. I think it was his way of saying “even though we’re fighting right now, I still care about you” and that kinda helped snap Hawk out of his near-psychopathic rage. In Season 3, he’s still shitty to Demetri, obviously, but it’s more controlled, not as unhinged or feral--even when Hawk breaks his arm, he hesitates a LOT before and regrets it IMMEDIATELY after in a way I’m not sure his UNCHECKED RAEEEGE self would have during the school fight.

~Over the years Demetri develops kind of a sixth sense of when Eli is about to have a meltdown. He’s able to pick up on super minute changes in body language, changes in the way Eli speaks, small alterations in Eli’s general temperament--basically anything that indicates he’s getting overwhelmed. That’s actually how he discovers the shoulder squeeze tactic--Demetri realizes he needs a quick way to comfort and reassure Eli when he can’t go in for a full hug (like they’re in the middle of class or something) so he can calm Eli down a bit and stop him from having a meltdown. Mainly because Demetri knows the bullies will have a field day if Eli cries in front of the other kids, so the shoulder squeeze develops as sort of a way to protect Eli from this.

~At some point after Demetri first started using the shoulder touch/squeeze on Eli, Eli started also using it on Demetri to quickly communicate affection/appreciation. Demetri isn’t nearly as touch-averse or picky with physical touch as Eli, and would’ve been okay with a number of physical touches, but he’s honestly super touched that Eli saw him doing a thing and was like “Oh hey!!! Demetri does this thing to me and it makes me feel safe and loved, so I’m sure it’ll do the same if I do it to him!!!” It kinda becomes their special touch, and becomes somewhat of a silent “I love you” (although obviously these two clueless idiots are led to believe it’s ONLY platonic love for many, many years XD). You can see Eli give a little shoulder pat/squeeze to Demetri at the beach party in 1x09!!

~Eli really does not like being touched around or under the chin, mainly because this is how bullies like Kyler touch him and it’s triggering for him. Demetri basically never touches him here. Even after they get together and start getting intimate, Demetri tends to touch/stroke Eli’s cheeks or the side of his head if he wants to touch his face, but he avoids touching Eli’s chin like the plague because he knows how much Eli dislikes it. This is something Eli really deeply appreciates--even Moon wasn’t able to catch on to the fact that he didn’t like having his chin touched, and he was too obsessed with coming across as “tough” to her to admit that it bothered him. Moon didn’t mean any harm at all, of course, she just wasn’t able to pick up on his more subtle indications that he wasn’t a huge fan of chin touches. Demetri has come to pick these indications up by second nature.

~The whole thing Demetri does at the beginning of the show where he kinda talks “for” Eli (the thing that, ironically, people loooooove to blast him about for being a “terrible friend”) I think is largely done because Eli is autistic. Eli seems to have a lot of social anxiety right from the get-go--he doesn’t even verbally greet Miguel when he first sits with him and Demetri and Demetri introduces Eli. Eli just kinda awkwardly smiles and nods at him. He’s obviously not great with social cues either, which we see later on--he’s so PAINFULLY oblivious to the fact that Piper is super not at all into it when he tries to hit on her in Season 2. I imagine after a number of social blunders in their youth, and seeing just how uncomfortable and anxious social situations made Eli, Demetri took the reigns and did a lot of communicating FOR Eli to take some of the pressure off of him to talk. I’d argue that once Demetri is taken out of the picture, we can see in full force JUST how socially anxious and uncomfortable Eli really is--he seems damn near terrified trying to stand up for himself against Johnny when Demetri’s not there. He’s lowkey stuttering and tripping over his words, his voice is shaking. He nearly leaves the room in tears. He’s used to letting Demetri be his voice, and this seems to be what makes him feel safest and most secure. When this is taken away, he has to find a new way to protect himself--hence, possibly, the entire Hawk persona.

~Eli has a lot of issues with emotional regulation and often feels emotions really, really strongly and gets overwhelmed by them--as an ADHDer, this is a struggle I understand SO MUCH. When Eli gets really overwhelmed with strong emotion, he tends to have meltdowns. These can be either sadness-based meltdowns (like we see in the flashback) or angry meltdowns (like we see when he beats Brucks up). Due to his emotional regulation issues, Eli has a really hard time hiding his emotions or stopping a meltdown once it kinda onsets--this is why he tends to “bawl” at movies. Once he starts crying, he can’t really stop, or reign it in--it just keeps coming. He also can’t really hold it back--his emotions tend to force their way out, whether he wants them to or not. This is also why he goes so HARD when he’s angry--wailing on Brucks, throwing punch after punch at Demetri at the school fight, getting carried away and attacking Robby’s injured shoulder at the tournament. His anger (and other emotions) tends to just kinda explode out, and he has a really hard time reigning them back in and keeping them in check. Demetri, ever the voice of ration and reason, can help with this--and probably has a lot, historically. With Demetri less and less in the picture and their relationship on the rocks, Eli’s emotions just seem to get even more wild and uncontrolled, particularly his anger. Part of the reason I think Demetri and Eli work so well together--Eli tends to get very caught up in his emotions (no shame in that--I’ll admit I do too!), and needs someone to help him keep his feet on the ground and be the pragmatist who helps him keep things in perspective.

~Karate is most definitely a special interest for him. It lowkey takes over his life and he makes it damn near his entire identity--big special interest energy. And Demetri (at first, at least) is lowkey so supportive!!! Like he goes to the all-valley tournament to support and cheer Eli on, despite not having any personal interest in fighting and seeming to think the whole thing is the kind of dumb macho shit that goes against everything his nerd identity stands for XD But he goes to the tournament anyways to clap for his boyfriend best friend’s badassery!!! The real MVP!!! Also special interests in general (not unlike ADHD hyperfixations) tend to be very random, hence why seemingly out of nowhere Eli gets absolutely OBSESSED with karate.

~Just a random little headcanon I have (I think I mentioned it on one of my general headcanon posts), but I like to think after Eli adopts the whole “Hawk” persona, he gets a special interest in birds of prey in general for a little while. Like back before he’s too “tough” for anything even remotely related to “nerd shit,” he watches nature documentaries on raptors and the whole 9 yards and constantly rambles excitedly to Demetri about how badass he thinks they are, and how cool it is that they can “literally hunt mice from the sky and shit” (probably an exact quote from him). Demetri finds this sudden new obsession both amusing and kind of endearing--but as always, he shows an interest in it and accommodates it as best he can. I imagine he’s seen Eli go through a number of special interests over the years, and is a pro by now on how to handle them (my own childhood best friend is a fellow ADHDer, and he was CONSTANTLY getting new hyperfixations--I imagine it was something like that XD).

~The whole “Hawk” persona in general seems pretty autistic, speaking of that--like it’s almost entirely based in mimicry and masking. Like Hawk pretty frequently mimics Johnny’s expressions, body language, and speech patterns, and (at least at first) Miguel’s fighting style. He also starts to mimic a lot of Kreese’s problematic views and general “never accept defeat” attitude in late Season 2 and Season 3, setting his good old Bastardization Arc in full swing. The whole Hawk thing could easily be masking, especially given how exaggerated and overdramatic Eli’s facial expressions, voice, and actions tend to be when he’s trying to be Hawk. When he slips back into “Eli” (or how he was before he adopted the mask), it’s usually around Demetri (i.e. the Doctor Who conversation)--which makes sense, since Demetri “gets” Eli better than most people and Eli doesn’t have to mask or overexaggerate his expressions or statements to communicate effectively with Demetri. They’ve known each other so long and Demetri is so familiar with his body language and mannerisms that Demetri is able to pick up fairly easily on what Eli’s trying to communicate/express without Eli having to work too hard at getting his point across. It’s why Eli’s expressions and body language aren’t nearly as exaggerated around Demetri, even when he’s trying to intimidate him--he knows he doesn’t have to overstate what he’s doing to communicate with Demetri.

~Relating back to the social troubles and social anxiety thing, I think Eli has always had trouble communicating verbally, hence why he’s so quiet at first. And even when he does get more talkative, a lot of it is mimicking other people’s speech patterns and ideas (namely Johnny’s at first)--it doesn’t really feel like him talking. Even alone with Demetri, he tends to prefer to let Demetri do the talking, hence Demetri saying Eli’s a “man of few words.” He often prefers to communicate nonverbally through body language, and when he DOES communicate verbally, he does it somewhat sparingly and chooses his words carefully, not usually bothering to say things he doesn’t mean (if he isn’t masking, anyways). THIS is why Demetri was so ready to accept such a short, concise “I’m sorry for all of it” from Eli instead of a long, drawn-out apology for each individual thing he did wrong. Eli knows he doesn’t have to bother masking to communicate with Demetri, so he’s not going to bother saying something that isn’t genuine. Eli has never been the greatest at articulating his thoughts verbally either, so TRYING to apologize for each individual thing he did to Demetri would be extremely hard for him, and Demetri knows this. This is why he accepts Eli’s apology without question and doesn’t expect him to elaborate on it. He knows Eli’s communicating a lot more than he’s actually saying aloud, if that makes any sense, and he cares more about the entirety of what Eli’s trying to say rather than just the spoken part. And Eli definitely communicates he’s genuinely remorseful through his actions as well--saving Demetri from the Cobras, teaming up with Demetri afterwards to help Deme’s side win the fight, straight up openly BETRAYING Kreese and Cobra Kai AT GREAT PERSONAL RISK TO HIMSELF (especially if Tory’s threat is anything to go by!!!) in order to go back to Demetri. Honestly, given everything he knows about Eli and how he operates, expresses himself, and communicates, I highly doubt Demetri expects at all for Eli to go on a long, detailed rant about how sorry he is and is honestly just grateful to have Eli back in his life.

~I think at the beginning of the show, Demetri puts a lot of work into helping Eli feel as safe and secure as possible--possibly in part because Eli’s autism makes him feel kinda isolated as a “freak” or “outcast” or what have you. Demetri makes an effort to crack jokes and make Eli laugh when no one else will, possibly to help Eli feel more relaxed and at ease. And Demetri’s reluctance to try out karate could be a kind of misguided overprotectiveness on his part--he’s spent a lot of time building up their own little world for them where he can keep Eli relatively comfortable, and he’s worried anything that interferes with that or shakes up the status quo is going to stress out or overwhelm Eli too much. Demetri wants to keep things as they are, because even if it’s not perfect, and they still get bullied on the regular, at least he KNOWS how best to help Eli and help him feel better (or at least he thinks he does) in their current situation (i.e. “I think we’d rather spend our afternoons playing Crucible Control than getting hit in the face”). If they were put into a drastically different new situation, he WOULDN’T know how he should best assist and support Eli with it, and that scares him a lot--because he’s ALWAYS kind of intuitively known how to help Eli, and the thought of anything changing that makes him terrified that without him, Eli is going to get really hurt somehow.

I think that just about covers everything--might add more stuff if I think of it! Definitely go check out @jackonthelongwalk’s blog for more quality, in-depth autistic Eli content!!!

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spookyseraphs · 3 years

Text

supernatural and the x-files (specifically destiel and msr) parallels

this was intended to convert my spn friends to txf and my txf friends to spn and then it got out of hand. i got tired of finding sources for everything, so you’ll just have to trust me, i’m an expert on both subjects.

cas=scully

cas/scully's faith in god vs dean/mulder being non-believers (but believing in the other) (spn) (txf)

cas being the healer, scully being a doctor (spn) (txf)

cas is supposed to guard the michael sword but falls in love vs scully sent to debunk the x-files but falls in love (spn) (txf)

cas and scully are both immortal (spn) (txf) (also)

cas/scully's families hate dean/mulder (spn) (txf)

cas/scully coming to believe in humanity/the paranormal (spn) (txf)

i'm an angel vs i'm a medical doctor (spn doesn’t have a compilation) (txf)

they’re not like... the best drivers

hello dean vs mulder it’s me (spn) (txf)

dean=mulder

dean/mulder's fucked up fathers (spn) (txf)

dean/mulder's eldest child syndrome and their unhealthy need to protect their younger sibling (spn) (txf)

dean/mulder being the best in their respective fields (hunting and criminal profiling) and being well known for it

dean/mulder and their porn habits (spn) (txf)

no one has ever hated themselves the way dean and mulder hate themselves (spn) (txf)

dean and mulder both have issues with fire (spn) (txf)

both die, get buried, and then come back

sunflower seeds vs pie

also they both hate nazis (spn) (txf)

yellow fever vs war of the coprophages (spn) (txf)

ship parallels

blue and green eyes (hazel is close enough)

for some reason theres a pizza man parallel? (spn) (pt 2) (txf) (pt 2)

mulder/krycek vs dean/crowley (spn) (txf) (also)

cas/hannah vs scully/pendrell (poor hannah and pendrell never stood a chance... and died)

also cas/scully get laid ONE TIME (april/ed jerse) and they almost die because of it and then never do it again (spn) (txf)

vs dean/mulder having plenty of love interests/hookups

cas/scully have never done anything wrong ever

dean/mulder... sigh... i love them... but they've made some questionable decisions (i'm looking at you mulder: fucking the vampire THE EP AFTER SCULLY'S ABDUCTION AND WHILE WEARING HER CROSS and dean, kicking cas out and locking jack in the ma’lak box?? really guys?) (spn) (txf)

creators who think their relationship is platonic despite everyone with eyes saying otherwise (spn) (txf)

also the way that neither were ever written or intended to be romantic

the fandoms were split heavily between shippers and non shippers

they also both had to have scenes changed because they were being played too romantic

a kiss was cut from the episode memento mori and gillovny were always trying to hold hands (x)

jackles forever wanting to cradle misha's face and the cut i love you from the crypt scene (x)

just... gillovny vs cockles in general, i am not a real person shipper, HOWEVER they are both messy (spn) (txf)

their first meetings? iconic. chemistry? immaculate. dean/mulder are super defensive but tbh cas/scully fell in love at first sight (spn) (txf)

they also had no concept of personal space pretty much immediately (spn) (txf)

they have a baby (that has magic powers) together that they lose twice (jack dies and becomes god, william/jackson is adopted and then as far as they know he dies) (spn) (txf)

cas/scully also have a kind of kid (claire/emily) that dean/mulder are willing to co-parent regardless of the fact that they definitely aren't theirs (spn) (txf)

we get an i love you that still doesn't get taken seriously or make them canon (stuck in the middle (with you) and triangle) (spn) (txf)

dean keeping cas's trenchcoat vs mulder keeping scully's cross (spn) (txf)

they go absolutely batshit when the other is in danger or dies/is dying (spn) (txf)

they're also known and used by their enemies as each other's weaknesses (spn) (txf)

msr being mistaken as a couple vs every angel and demon cracking jokes about destiel being a couple (spn) (txf)

skinner and sam just off to the side looking frustrated while msr and destiel are having a couples moment (spn) (txf)

eating each others food (spn) (txf)

appreciating each others interests (spn) (and this one) (txf)

parallels except the roles are swapped

dreamland/small potatoes vs casifer, i just think scully/dean should have realized IMMEDIATELY (spn) (txf)

mulders fight the future speech vs cas's confession (spn) (txf)

they should have kissed and didn't

it almost ambiguously canonizes them both

AND THE SECRET TAPES, the most famous msr kiss isn't an actual canon kiss, it's a blooper of gillian and david making out in front of the camera (two different times) and it wasn't scripted it was literally just them messing around (x)

this is me manifesting jackles dropping the tapes and those tapes having the same energy

they just really love each other (spn) (txf)

non ship/general parallels

leyla harrison vs becky rosen being fandom stand ins (spn) (txf)

they were supposed to end on season 5

Good but bad (absolutely iconic) sci-fi shows

they both had two finales which both sucked

they shared soooo many cast and crew and both filmed in vancouver

they're such similar shows, motw/story episodes, the funny and serious episodes, dealing with the paranormal, they're basically siblings

also siblings in the way that they handle racism, misogyny and consent/rape/bodily autonomy

the supernatural book series vs the movie made about mulder and scully (spn) (txf)

mystery spot vs monday (spn) (txf)

tall tales vs bad blood (spn) (txf)

the benders vs home (spn) (txf)

why did both shows use live bees??? (spn) (txf)

the fbi's most wanted and the fbi's most unwanted (also everyone involved looks cute as fbi agents) (spn) (look how cute!) (txf) (cuties!!)

the syndicate vs heaven and the cigarette smoking man vs god

the bunker vs the basement office

every single side character on both shows deserved better!!! most of them literally didn't need to die!!! and i'm still angry!!!

the poor brothers adam milligan and charlie scully existing and then being literally forgotten about until the last season

the fandoms living for things cut from the scripts (spn) (txf)

team free will vs mulder, scully, and skinner

these ones are shippy, but more my opinion than factual

both pairs just keep getting traumatic events dumped on them for absolutely no reason

cas/scully both have major exasperated why do i love this man vibes

absolutely most iconic and slowest slow burn romances of all time and are just the longest games of will they/won't they, baiting, and were never INTENDED to be slow burns

they're always willing to die/kill for each other, however they WILL NOT talk about their feelings under any circumstances

in the field where i died, mulder says that he and scully have been around each other in past lives but never romantically and according to chuck, every other universe's castiel just pulled dean out of hell and listened to his orders

SO in these other lives/universes they were always linked to each other but only in this life/universe do they fall in love

the last seasons really fuck up my favorite characters

dean should not be that shitty to jack OR cas for that matter

and mulder shouldn't have left scully and william (and dearest dana?? DANA?)

and, controversial opinion, but cas/scully could do so much better and deserve so much better but dean/mulder... it's the best they'll ever get

HOWEVER, i feel like their love is MORE powerful BECAUSE cas/scully could do better but they don't want better or normal they want dean/mulder and they will fight to the death for it, it's not the easy choice, it's just what they want

and i say this with all the love in the world for both dean and mulder, but cas could have just followed his orders and returned to heaven like every other version of himself did. scully could have easily found a normal man to settle down and have 2.5 kids with. dean was always going to be stuck in chuck's plans, and mulder absolutely could not just go find a wife to settle down with.

cas/scully put up with SO MUCH SHIT from dean/mulder, while being ALWAYS FAITHFUL to them, it was never the easy option to love these men and stay by their sides, it was hard and they worked for it!!!

they’re both the greatest love story ever told, they tied

#spn #supernatural #destiel #deancas #txf #The X-Files #x files #msr #oops i guess the indented bullets don't work on mobile #anyway #i really spent two days doing this #making this made me really have to confront what is canon and what is fanon deeply ingrained in my mind #ALSO every msr moment is perfect when imagined as destiel #and vice versa #if i were smarter i'd write actual meta about this cause it was actually super interesting

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marvels-agents100 · 4 years

Text

the thing about love

volume I

sure, it could hurt you, baby, but give a little try

pairing: aaron hotchner x gender neutral ! reader

warnings: gore, death, blood, aaron is sad and traumatized, reader is shot, the usual,,, reader attempts to seduce a man at one point

word count: 14,685 (grab a snack, babes)

author’s note: welcome to s l o w b u r n central, also, this is currently my pride and joy, my lil babey, please love her

You knew he wasn’t yours to have. His heart had left him long ago, locked in a box in the back corner of his closet, leaving behind a dark void between the cobwebbed bars of his ribs, his burdened breaths a soft echo inside his chest. The only love, the only care he felt he was really capable of was the love he held for Jack. And yet, he laid in bed every night and wished the silk of his sheets would cover him completely, swallowing him into wherever he went when he fell asleep, locking the door behind him and losing the key. The guilt alone was eating him alive- how dare he feel exhausted for loving his son?- and it never left his mind, no matter how focused he was on a case. The lack of compartmentalization was something that would take time to get used to.

You saw it on his face, every time the glass door to the BAU swung open with the push of a heavy arm, every time the lines under his eyes became darker and deeper, every time he sighed like the sorrow and darkness that plagued his mind had leaned upon his shoulders once more. It killed you to see the weight he carried every day; you couldn’t begin to imagine how he felt. What completely broke the beat within your chest was how much you wished you could help, yet you knew he would never let you.

That was, until he did.

You had joined the BAU after Elle left, also specializing in sex crimes. The team is your family, your life, and everything in between. You watched them rise and fall, love and lose, laugh and cry. And every time one of you needed help, the others were there to support each other. It was a beautiful, wonderful thing, the BAU. And that beautiful, wonderful thing also included a certain Aaron Hotchner. Most of the team were too intimidated to ever really try prying into Hotch’s psyche, especially since Hailey died. However, one particular day, you couldn’t stop yourself.

Your knuckles tapped gently on the door to his office, your ear close to the wood, listening for a response. The blinds had been drawn the entire day, and hours had passed since the rest of the team had departed. If you didn’t know better, you would worry if Aaron was even alive in his office.

“Come in,” his voice rumbled, the words slipping past his lips with a small sigh.

You opened the door cautiously, first looking inside, then fully stepping in. It shut behind you with a soft click, Aaron’s eyes never looking up from the file before him. His left hand lazily dragged out a signature along the bottom of the page. Your arms tightened around the small stack of files you held in your arms- a compilation of yours, Spencer’s, and Emily’s.

You cleared your throat softly, “Hotch,” you greeted, a polite smile on your lips as his gaze finally flickered up to you, “this is all the work from Spence, Emily, and I on the Atlanta case.”

“You can leave it on the table there,” he gestured towards a small end table with his pen, before returning to his writing, “thank you.”

You nodded, setting the stack of papers down softly, stealing a glance at him before turning and making your way back to the door. Your hand hesitated as it reached for the knob, your heart begging you to turn around and talk to him, comfort him, absolutely anything to just help him.

He noticed your hesitation, your frozen stance by the door catching his attention. He sat up fully, his pen dropping on the desk as his brows knitted together.

“Is there something else, (Y/L/N)?”

Your outstretched and hovering hand slowly closed to a fist, your eyes shutting as you realized there was no way to play this off without him being suspicious. You turned to him, meeting his gaze and trying to keep from caving under his intense stare.

“Actually,” your hands ran down your pant legs, and you found yourself finding a seat across from him, “there… there is.”

He leaned forward on the desk, his expression still studying you, but his voice softening as he recognized how nervous you were, “What’s going on?”

“Sir,” you began, having trouble meeting his eyes, “I don’t want to overstep, and I know you’re a private person, but you’ve been in this office all day with the blinds shut and the door closed and- well, I’m sure I speak for the whole team right now- but we’re worried that you’re not okay, and if you wanted to talk- not that you’d need to, I’m sure you can work through a lot on your own, being knowledgeable in psychology and all-“

“(Y/N).” He cut off your rambling, your eyes finally snapping to his when he said your name. He paused for a beat before continuing, “I’m sorry if I worried you.”

You sighed, trying to not be discouraged by his complete avoidance of your question.

“What’s going on, Hotch?” You asked softly. He looked down at his hands, sighing deeply.

“It’s nothing you have to worry about,” he shook his head slightly as he spoke.

“But I do. And I will. I worry, you know that.” You gave him a small smile when his gaze lifted back to you. He returned it for only a moment before it dropped away from his lips.

“It’s just…” he took another breath, “it would’ve… it would’ve been her birthday today.”

As his voice croaked out those words, you felt the beating of your heart stop. The physical ache made you drop your head for a moment, just to catch your breath.

“I’m so sorry, I-“

“It’s okay.” He interrupted you again, “I know it’s been a while now, and I’ve been able to make peace, for the most part. But, every time today comes around, or Christmas, Thanksgiving- hell, whenever any holiday comes around- he always… Jack always-“

He couldn’t finish his sentence, his hand coming to rest against the bridge of his nose, catching the tears that threatened to spill over. Your head tilted as you watched him, tears of your own beginning to gloss your eyes.

“He asks about her, doesn’t he?” Your voice was barely a whisper.

Aaron sniffled, letting a deep breath straighten his back again as he tried to compose himself.

He nodded, “Yeah, he does,” he scoffed and shook his head, “I never know what to say.” The chuckle that fell from his lips was humorless, just a sad acknowledgment of how pathetic he felt.

“God, Aaron, who would?” Your once hesitant hand reached forward and rested upon his, “You are living in a situation with Jack that no one could have prepared you for, one that no one will ever have the answers for.”

“Is that supposed to make me feel better?” He joked, a single laugh escaping as he used his free hand to wipe away a tear. You let out a watery chuckle, giving his hand a squeeze.

“Yes, because despite the fact that there isn’t a single parenting manual on raising a kid like Jack, everything that you have figured out on your own has made him into the wonderful little boy he is.” You smiled at him, “You are an amazing father. The world deserves more dads that are like you.”

He gave your hand a squeeze, a real, genuine smile gracing his lips. A moment passed before he spoke again.

“Thank you, (Y/N), I appreciate you checking in on me.”

“We were all worried, sir.” You replied, “And we all know you don’t really talk about the dark, stormy thoughts that bounce around that head of yours,” he chuckled at that, “but, I felt like you needed to know: we’re always here. I’m always here. If you want to talk, if you want me to talk and distract your thoughts, if you just need the presence of someone in the room- no matter what it is- I’m here.”

He nodded once, eyes never leaving yours, “Thank you.” His voice was much quieter now.

You gave his hand a pat and stood, smoothing down your pants with your palms.

“Anytime.”

He stood as well, circling his desk to open the door to the office. You were close behind, stopping short when the door didn’t open. Aaron’s hand was stagnant on the knob, his eyes locked on yours.

“What is it?” You asked, a confused look on your face.

“I-“ he paused, then shook his head and opened the door, “have a good night, (Y/N).”

You nodded politely, choosing to ignore his behavior, knowing he had already made himself vulnerable enough for the night.

“You too, sir.”

***

“(Y/N), Spence, we have a case.” JJ breezed by the two of you, heading for the conference room. You were hovering over Spencer’s shoulder, his hand scribbling on the beaten pages of a legal pad. It was his idea, attempting to solve the Zodiac’s cypher. He could pick out patterns with a single glance, and you were able to add the small, less logical and structured details that his analytical mind always seemed to miss.

Needless to say, neither of you had figured anything out. It was simply a way to pass down time.

Upon entering the conference room, Spencer close behind, you found your seat between Emily and Derek. Penelope began pulling images onto the screen, her brightly colored fingernails tapping softly on her tablet. You leaned back in your chair, toes rocking it ever so lightly back and forth, back and forth. Hotch was the last to arrive only seconds later, his presence alone notifying you of his arrival. He had a way of making himself known before speaking a single word.

“Garcia,” he urged, signaling for her to begin.

“Alright,” she began, the unmistakable sunshine leaking through her words, “giddy up, cow boys and girls, you’re headed to Houston!”

You had to hold back your giggle- it sounded like she was pitching a dream vacation.

“Unfortunately, it’s not to attend the rodeo, but to find who killed these three men in the past month.” Three pictures flashed onto the screen, the bodies of three victims displaying before the BAU. “The bodies of Tyee, Kele, and Dakota were found three weeks, two weeks, and almost one week ago.”

“Why are we just now being called in?” You asked.

Garcia sighed, almost sadly, “Police claim to have not seen a connection, but others living on the reservation say that police didn’t try to.”

A pause fell over the room, the only movement being Derek’s head shaking slightly in disappointment.

“Cause of death?” Hotch asked, breaking the small silence.

"They were all shot once in the chest, then- and this is an image that will never leave my mind- were scalped. If that wasn’t enough gross and icky for you, they were all missing their left thumb.”

“Tyee Begaye, Kele Etcitty, Dakota Nez. All mid 30’s, all Native American, all living in the Alabama-Coushatta reservation. The similarity between them all makes me think they could be surrogates,” Morgan stated, his fingers carding through the file before him.

“What are they wearing?” Emily asked, referring to the burlap and tan clothing that, frankly, looked like a cheap and offensive Halloween costume.

“That, my lovely Emily, would be an attempt at traditional Native clothing.” Garcia replied, “Strong emphasis on attempt.”

“The scalping indicates that the Unsub is probably white, since the textbooks teach that it was purely a Native ritual. In reality, it was a white governor who offered rewards for ‘Indian scalps’.” Your fingers made air quotes around your words, “Maybe we have a white supremacist who is trying to seek some twisted form of revenge.”

“The missing thumb interests me,” Rossi thinks out loud, “is there a ritual or tradition that involves the thumb?”

“Not necessarily,” Spencer spoke, “however, the now disbanded Atakapa tribe lived along the Gulf of Mexico, until an epidemic nearly killed the entirety of the tribe in the late 18th century. They believed in life after death, and anyone who died by a snakebite, or whose corpse was eaten by another human, would be denied that afterlife.”

“Why would our Unsub be displaying rituals from a tribe that doesn’t exist?” JJ questioned.

“That’s a question we can answer on the plane,” Hotch stood from his chair, “if our Unsub sticks to his timeline, we have two days to find him before he kills again. Wheels up in 30.”

***

Discussion on the plane wasn’t leading very far, mostly because of the lack of information the team had on the murders. It was abundantly clear that local authorities, or at least the particular officers that had investigated the murders, didn’t take much interest in actually finding who had commit them. It was incredibly frustrating, knowing that you and your team could be miles closer to finding a serial killer if prejudice didn’t stand in the way of justice.

You pushed those thoughts away, knowing that thinking too hard about it would just infuriate you. There wasn’t time to be angry, you had to focus.

“Why the outfits?” Rossi asked, “These men are clearly Native American, why feel the need to dress them in stereotypical clothing?”

“It has to be a part of the fantasy,” JJ answers, “they look like they’re characters from a western.”

“What time period was traditional clothing like this worn?” Emily inquired, her eyes never leaving the file in front of her.

“When forced assimilation of the 19th and 20th centuries began, traditional clothing stopped being made in the name of appeasing the powers that be,” Spencer began, fingers wiggling with his words, “Most traditional, Native American fashion designers began making clothing only for certain celebrations and rituals, exclusively for personal use. It wasn’t until 1934 that the passage of the Indian Reorganization Act began to encourage the production of traditional clothing once more. The patterns and weaving we see in modern fashion today all began in 1942, when Native American fashion was featured in a high profile fashion show, and instead of being discouraged, was appreciated. Most designers use their Native roots to assimilate traditional textile with modern trends in order to reach a larger audience.”

“So clothing like this isn’t mass produced?” Morgan asked.

“Unless it’s close to October 31st, no,” Spencer answered.

“It’s August, there’s no way he purchased these almost a year ago, he wouldn’t have been able to control his urges for that long.” Emily shook her head, completely baffled.

“Maybe he’s making them?” You offered, doubt in your voice, “I mean, they don’t exactly look well made.”

“He could be ordering them online,” Hotch countered.

“Alright, alright,” JJ interrupted, “I think the significance lies in what the costumes are supposed to mean. He’s calling back to before the 19th century. What fantasy is exclusive to that time frame and involves Native Americans?”

“If we had more information on the killing itself, I feel like a lot of these questions would be answered,” Dave’s voice was laced with frustration.

“I agree,” Hotch began, “Prentiss, Morgan, I want you to talk to the ME, try to find absolutely anything that wasn’t reported. David, (Y/L/N), go to the newest scene and see if you can add to the reports as well. Reid, JJ, and I will go set up at the station, start interviewing families and the officers that were on the original scenes. We need to get all the information they neglected to share,” Hotch directed, approving nods coming from the rest of the team.

“And if they try to stop us?” Morgan asked, Hotch giving him a confused look.

“What do you mean?” He asked.

“Look, when I was with the Chicago PD, I saw this kind of prejudice within my own precinct. Bad cops won’t stop being bad cops just because we’re in their jurisdiction.”

Hotch paused a moment before speaking.

“Our job is to build a profile and catch whoever is doing this,” he began, “and we are going to do that, even if a bad cop- or anyone, for that matter- tries to get in our way. We’ve dealt with worse than this; I have faith that this team can still perform successfully.”

Morgan nodded in agreement, but you knew he still had his doubts, “Yes, sir.”

You all had dispersed through the jet, Emily and Spencer fiddling with a chess board between them, Morgan and Rossi both listening to music and staring dramatically through the window, and JJ flipping through her file in her own space, reading and rereading every word until her eyes ached. It was a habit, she knew, trying to memorize every detail of the case in order to justify her decision to present it to the team. Although choosing cases was no longer her responsibility, she still found herself with the guilt of not being able to help every person whose name was written in manila files on her desk.

You sat across from Hotch, him close to the window, your feet propped up on his unused armrest. You hummed lowly to yourself while glancing over the file, fingers tapping against the manila to the beat of your voice.

“You know,” Hotch spoke up, “if you ruin this seat with your shoes, it’s coming out of your paycheck.”

Your humming stopped and your eyes snapped up to him, catching the small smirk on the corner of his mouth, the smirk that he tried in vain to play off as he kept his gaze trained on the open file in his hand. A smirk of your own tugged at your lips, the papers in your grip falling lazily into your lap.

“You mess with my check, Hotchner, and I will consider you an enemy,” You threatened, your finger pointing at him to emphasize your words.

He shrugged casually, eyes lifting to meet yours, “I’ll add you to the list.”

Your angry resolve broke, a chuckle leaving your lips. Although his joking caught you off guard slightly, it all was oddly comfortable. His shoulders weren’t tight like they usually were, his eyebrows weren’t tensed, and his frown had disappeared. Usually, his rare humor would throw the whole team for a loop, but when it was just you and Hotch, there was just something so natural about it.

“Yeah, put my name right between ‘going to bed at a decent hour’ and ‘smiling’.” You retorted, narrowing your eyes and giving him nothing less than a shit-eating grin.

His face dropped from the sly smirk to stone-cold in a split second, causing your smile to grow even wider.

“How did you know that?” He asked quietly. You laughed then, a full, joyful laughter. You didn’t see how his smile had returned, and his softened gaze stayed trained on you.

“I guess you could say I’m good at my job,” You replied, wiping under your eye as you caught your breath.

“Now that,” he pointed at you, “is something I can’t deny.”

You smiled again, but genuinely. It almost made you blush, him inadvertently saying that you were good at your job. He didn’t compliment people too often, but when he did, it was always completely genuine and special.

“But I will still make you pay for this seat.”

“Yeah, okay,” you giggled, waving your hand dismissively at him.

***

The crackle of dirt and gravel under your soles mixed with the bustling of law enforcement around you. Rossi walked close by, both of you stopping as you reached the true crime scene. He sighed deeply as his eyes scanned over the red stain in the terra-cotta colored dirt, trying to not think about how little the uniforms around him cared about the life that stain had once provided.

“It’s pretty desolate out here,” you stated, purposely keeping your eyes up as you scanned the mountains around you, “the Unsub definitely knows this place, he’s familiar with it.”

“That means he’s probably local,” David agreed, eyes never leaving the dried blood on the ground, “(Y/N), look at this and tell me what you see.”

Your eyes finally flickered down to the blood, your hands finding home in your pockets in an attempt to hide your clenching fists.

“It’s…” your voice trailed off, your head tilting slightly as you realized what David was hinting at, “It’s… small. Dakota was shot, this all just looks like blood lost from the scalping and the removal of the thumb.”

“Which means,” Rossi added, “this is just a dumpsite. He’s taking them to a secondary location.”

“How long between the missing person’s reports and the discovery of their bodies?”

“Hours, no more than a day.”

You sighed, stepping closer and lowering yourself towards the ground, elbows resting on your knees. “So, he’s not holding them, but he’s shooting them in a secondary location before bringing them to these mountains, and dumping them.” You stood again, turning to David, “Why?”

His head shook slightly, “Possibly a forensic countermeasure. If he were to shoot them here, he could leave behind casings, splatter patterns… more evidence than what we have now, at least.”

You glanced one last time at the ground before beginning to walk towards the SUV. “I think we should get back and tell them what we’ve found.”

Rossi got into the driver’s side while you settled in next to him, a matching frown on both of your faces. You looked out the window, allowing your mind to drift away from the case. Usually, you stopped straying thoughts before they could begin, but you decided to set them free for the duration of the car ride back to the station. Upon arrival, your mind was to be strictly business.

You first thought of Hotch. You thought of the exchange you had a few weeks prior, where he opened himself up to you, even if it was just a fraction of the feelings he kept bottled up inside. Things had shifted, at least in your perspective, since then. He was more… himself. When there wasn’t a case- those few and far between days of strictly paperwork- you would find him smiling a little more, always directed at you. It was always just a tilt of his lips, just a twitch at best, but you always noticed it. He would find you in the break room, he would make light conversation. It was always professional, always appropriate in his position of Unit Chief, but you knew it was more personal.

Maybe it was your wishful thinking, maybe it was all made up by your own habit of overanalyzing. But, the physical reaction you had whenever those small moments of warm sunshine burst through the dark curtain of SSA Aaron Hotchner, the way your stomach turned and your cheeks ignited, now that… that was not constructed by your mind. That was a real, true reaction to a man you (apparently) liked a little more than you originally thought.

“Penny for your thoughts?” David cut your wondering short, and you were almost thankful for it.

“Hm?” You acknowledged, snapping out of your daze.

“Call me a profiler,” he chuckled, “but I know when you’re thinking too hard. Is something bothering you?”

“No, no,” you denied, a small laugh leaving your lips, “just, trying to stay focused on this case.”

“Hm.” He hummed, obviously not believing you. “Is it about the 16th?”

Your eyes snapped to him, his gaze holding steady on the road in front of him. A breath of pause added to the sudden tension in the air.

“How do you know about that?”

“Anytime Aaron Hotchner cries, you can be sure that I will know about it.”

You sunk back into your chair as another beat of silence filled the SUV. Honestly, you had no clue how to talk about the situation between you and Hotch. And frankly, you didn’t know if there even was a situation, it could all be made up in your head. Telling Rossi that you have the hots for your boss wouldn’t fix any problems you currently faced, it would only create new ones.

“I just want to see him happy,” you whispered, keeping your eyes forward.

“He is happy-“

“I mean, truly happy, Dave,” your head rolled towards him, his shoulders dropping slightly as he understood what you meant. He sighed heavily, readjusting his grip on the wheel.

“I think he lost that when he lost her, (Y/N), I don’t think he will ever go back to who he was before,” he sounded so sad, admitting that the man he considered family would never see a light he once knew.

“Maybe,” you agreed, “but that doesn’t mean I won’t try like hell to help him find it again.”

Dave glanced at you, a small smile tilting his lips up, “I think you’re the perfect person for the job.”

***

You had arrived just as Emily and Derek did, Hotch and the Captain of the station coming to meet you at the door.

“Captain McGuire, this is SSA Emily Prentiss, Derek Morgan, (Y/N) (Y/L/N), and David Rossi.” Aaron introduced. The captain politely shook all of your hands.

“Thank you all for coming,” his words were borderline disingenuous, but you smiled politely and let it go.

“We’ve got some news to share,” Dave said, turning towards Hotch. He responded with a nod before turning and leading the four of you to the Houston PD conference room, where Spencer and JJ were already waiting. Everyone stood around the table, unable to sit down with how uneasy the case felt.

“Everything here is just as you would imagine,” JJ began, clearly irritated, “these officers didn’t care enough to properly investigate these murders.”

“All of the families said that our victims were well respected, got along with other people, nothing too out of the ordinary,” Hotch added, his arms crossing over his chest as he looked at the evidence board.

“Dave and I think they’re being held in a secondary location,” you stated, everyone’s eyes turning to you. Your gaze met Aaron’s as you continued, “There wasn’t nearly enough blood at the scene for a man to have been shot there.”

“Forensic countermeasure?” Hotch inquired.

“That’s our guess.”

“Well,” Emily sighed, “I guess that makes more sense. The ME said the scalping and thumb removal was antemortem. The last step of his fantasy was shooting his victims. This guy would need somewhere to torture his victims without anyone hearing it.”

“I had Garcia do a search for any trespassing or squatting complaints around the mountains where the bodies were found, just to see if any witnesses saw the Unsub while he was disposing of his victims. There wasn’t anything significant,” Spencer chimed in.

“I’m starting to think this guy has more experience than we might think,” Morgan said, “he’s able to abduct, control, and torture grown men, then dispose of their bodies quietly.”

“What does that mean?” JJ asked.

“It means there’s probably more victims,” Hotch was storming out of the room as he spoke. You were close behind him.

“Spence, call Penelope, have her start digging!” you quickly spoke, hurrying to keep up with Hotch. You weren’t sure why, but you knew he was furious. He must have put something together before you.

“Hotch, Hotch!” You hissed, jogging lightly to catch up to him. “Aaron!” You finally stood in front of him, his angry steps halting before he could run you over, but his glare still trained on the door to Captain McGuire’s office.

Your hands hovered in front of you, level with his chest. You scanned his face, seeing nothing but anger in the way he glared over your shoulder.

“What is going on?” You asked quietly, teeth clenched together. It was then that his eyes flickered to you for a fraction of a second, a deep breath leaving his lungs. His shoulders lost some tension and his eyes closed, his attempt at calming himself clearly visible.

“We know this station is riddled with cops who don’t care about justice for anyone of Native descent,” he began, his voice low and dangerous, “how many people have died without justice? How many were at the hands of the same Unsub we’re trying to catch?”

“Hotch,” you tread carefully, “believe me when I say I am equally as furious as you. However, you, of all people, know that storming into that office right now will only cause more problems. We are surrounded by people who don’t care if we leave here successful or not, and the Captain may be a part of that group. We need to be smart about this.”

He huffed, but he knew you were right. It was a bit out of character, him getting so upset without being able to control it. He noticed that since Hailey had died, his emotions were a little stronger and a little harder to control, especially when it came to his job. His need for justice made him do things he would have never done when she was alive.

Was it a fault or strength?

“How do you propose we do that?” He asked, his voice more gentle than before.

“Let me go in there, break the news,” you offered, “if that man is anything like who I think he is, I could bat my eyes and get anything I want from him.”

Aaron’s gaze shifted from you, to the office, then to you again. “Okay,” he finally agreed, “in and out. Be careful.”

“Yes, sir,” you grinned, turning and walking towards the Captain’s office. You glanced back over your shoulder, seeing Hotch in the same exact spot you left him. Sending him a small wink, you reached the door and let yourself inside.

Hotch took another deep breath as you disappeared into the office, once again trying to calm himself. He had faith in you, he knew you could handle yourself, but the thought of that man- any other man, in fact- looking at you in the way he knew that Captain was going to look at you… well, that made him furious all over again. It was completely inappropriate, he knew, but he knew it wasn’t something that was within his control. He had just been feeling a greater sense- a greater need- to protect you, to make sure you were okay. He, himself, had a lot of questions about it. Why was he feeling this way? When did it start? Am I even able to feel this way again? Of course, he didn’t have any answers to his own questions. It always seemed to be that way. So many questions, all unanswered.

Despite his better judgment, he turned towards the conference room, fighting the bubbling anger in his chest.

***

The door clicked closed behind you, Captain McGuire’s eyes shifting from his paperwork to your face, then dragging down your body. You cleared your throat, your heartbeat already picking up slightly. You weren’t nervous, you knew you could take him down in a second if need be, but the way he looked at you like you were an object almost made you see red.

“Agent (Y/L/N), please, have a seat,” he gestured to the chair across from his desk.

“Thank you,” you spoke quietly, sitting down and crossing your legs, “I just came to discuss something quickly.”

“Of course, what is it?” He leaned forward on his elbows, a sign that he did, in fact, like you. You already knew that, of course, but the confirmation did make you a bit more confident.

“You see, we seem to think that this particular Unsub didn’t start killing three weeks ago. We think there’s previous cases,” you kept your voice soft, playing up an innocence you found that all men had some form of attraction to.

“With all due respect, I think I would remember a case like this.” He held his hand up as he talked in a way of dismissing you. You knew you could either snap at him and get kicked out, or play along and possibly get what you want. You had to feed into his ego.

“Oh, absolutely,” you agreed, uncrossing your legs and leaning forward, elbows resting on your knees. It gave him a full view, so to speak, and his eyes shifted exactly here you wanted them to. So predictable. “I would never insult your intelligence like that, sir,” he seemed to perk up at that nickname, “we’re just asking that you do a review with your officers, maybe someone will remember something they didn’t before?”

His eyes met yours again, and he had to clear his throat before he talked.

“Anything you need,” he was trying to flirt back now.

“Thank you, sir,” with a smirk, you stood and walked out, feeling the eyes of Captain McGuire follow you the entire way. As soon as the door was completely shut, you felt a chill run down your spine and you let yourself shiver.

You really hoped your flirting would get you something.

***

“Garcia, I need you to look for any cases within the Houston area that might be linked to these,” Spencer spoke into the phone.

“I already have, my little Einstein,” Garcia’s voice crackled through the speaker, “there’s nothing that looks like these.”

“They’re gonna be hidden, babygirl,” Morgan pressed, “details might have been left out in the case files. Send us anything that has even the smallest connection.”

“I’m going to need more time for that, love,” she sighed, nothing but disappointed in Houston authorities.

“Work fast for me, baby.”

“Oh, my beautiful, brown Hercules, do I work at any other speed?” She spoke seductively, earning a few smiles from the intensely frustrated team surrounding the phone.

“You never disappoint,” Morgan cooed, taking the phone and hanging up the call.

Hotch reached the room shortly after the call, everyone’s eyes snapping towards him as he entered. He looked over his team, eyebrows pulled downward, expression stone-cold.

“Are you okay, sir?” JJ asked bravely, her voice soft and understanding.

“I’m fine,” he muttered, “anything from Garcia?”

And just like that, Derek began to update Hotch on what Penelope was searching for, and all was forgotten. Hotch was good at that- making everyone forget about what he was feeling. The question he dreaded most was also the question he heard the most- are you okay? He would hear those three words and immediately have to find an escape, and excuse, as to why he couldn’t quite answer them. His feelings were ones that were felt only by him, shared only to the family picture he kept on his nightstand. It was comfortable, easy, and it kept him away from vulnerability.

He made sure he was facing towards the door of Captain McGuire while he worked, his gaze constantly flickering upwards and out the window of the conference room, hoping to find you there every time. When you finally emerged, he could tell how uncomfortable you were. You let yourself shiver, taking a moment to breathe before moving towards the conference room. Hotch made sure to meet you at the door.

“Anything?” He asked as soon as the door shut behind you. You sighed heavily before answering.

“He said he will reopen some cases and do some debriefing, but I honestly don’t think we will be getting much out of it.”

His eyes closed and he shook his head in disappointment. “Okay,” he finally spoke, “we’re on our own here.”

“Hotch, come look at this,” Derek called, pulling Aaron’s attention away from you. He hurried to Morgan, looking at the photograph held between them.

You moved towards the table and began working, praying to any God, any higher being, that something- anything- would catch a lead in the case.

***

“If I read one more file before I get a cup of coffee, I just might rip it to shreds,” you muttered, shoving your eyes into the heels of your hands. Your elbows rested heavily on the conference table you sat at, the many, many reviewed files scattered between you and the rest of the team. Analyzing them for any connections had been nothing short of tedious and time consuming.

It had been hours now, and nothing new had come to light. The sun had fallen asleep long ago, dipping behind the mountains, leaving a path of stars in its wake. The moon shone fully, the soft white blanketing Houston in a gentle embrace. You wished you could be sitting on the balcony of your apartment, staring at the twinkling of the stars and bathing in the cool air, your only warmth coming from a cup of hot tea gently resting in your hands. Instead, you were staring at pictures of dead men, trying to get ahead of a killer that was many, many steps ahead of you.

“Spence, have you found anything?” JJ asked, her voice sounding just as exhausted as you felt.

“I’ve read every file at least twice now,” he sighed, “I’m sorry, I can’t find any connections.”

“Don’t apologize, you’re doing everything you can,” you scolded softly, pointing a lazy finger towards him.

“Thank you,” he spoke gently, a thankful smile on his lips.

Your eyes returned to the papers before you, scanning over a single sentence before you gave up, “Why are we still looking, anyways? What do you think we’re going to find when- and if- we find any more victims?” Your hands accented your words, your frustration abundantly clear.

“MO,” Morgan answered shortly, “we need to know how this Unsub started- when he was still learning how to kill, when he was discovering what he liked most. That’s when he first made his mistakes.”

“Okay,” Rossi chimed in, “but how do we know that those cases were fully investigated? What if they’re just as neglected as the three we already have?”

Morgan sighed and ran a hand down his face, looking utterly defeated, “I don’t know.”

The ringing of Morgan’s cell phone caught everyone’s attention. He answered quickly, putting it on speaker.

“What’d you find, baby? You’re on speaker,” He asked.

“I’m sorry to report that I haven’t found much of anything,” Garcia said, “I mean, there are lots and lots of middle-aged, Native American men dying- which breaks my heart into very little, tiny pieces- but nothing that fits into our timeline or modus operandi.”

“Try expanding to neighboring states,” Emily recommended.

“I already did, sweet Emily,” Garcia sighed, “nothing.”

“Alright,” Morgan sighed, eyes closing as he exhaled, “keep searching, babygirl. Let us know if anything pops up.”

“Of course,” she sounded just as disappointed, “heads up, loves, we will find something.” Morgan hung up, setting his phone down before dragging a hand down his face.

Hotch’s file flipped shut in his hands, the fluttering catching the team’s attention, “We need to take a step back. Looking over the same words won’t get us any further.”

“What do you suggest we do?” Dave asked.

“Take an hour. Get coffee, food, whatever you need,” Hotch stood from his chair, straightening his suit jacket, “I wish we could stop for the day and return tomorrow, but we don’t have that kind of time.”

You stood, stretching your arms above your head, “Well,” your arms dropped to your sides, “I’ll take an hour. Hell, I would take 15 minutes. Any time for a mental break would be beneficial, at this point.”

“There’s a 24 hour pizza shop one block east,” JJ pointed out, “want to grab a bite there?”

“I’m in,” Derek stood.

“Me too,” Spencer agreed, rising as well.

“Pizza sounds so good right now,” Emily whined.

“Only if it is authentic,” Dave wagered, “(Y/N)? Hotch?”

“If I get full right now, I will definitely pass out,” you chuckled, “you guys go ahead.”

“Hotch?” Dave repeated.

“I’m okay, thank you,” his lips twitched into a polite smile for only a moment, then it was gone once again.

“Suit yourselves,” Derek teased, sending the two of you a dazzling smile as the rest of the team left the conference room.

You dared to peek over at Hotch, watching as his eyes looked back down at the numerous open files in his workstation. He even picked one up from the table to get a closer look.

“This break includes you, you know,” you said, smirking when his eyes jumped from the page to you. He set down the file again, a sigh falling from his lips.

“I don’t think I could take a break from this one, even if I wanted to,” he shook his head slightly as he spoke, arms crossing over his chest. A small silence filled the room.

“Okay,” you sighed, “I’m going to get us some coffee- good coffee, from the store across the street- and maybe some food, then we can sit and look over some of these together. Maybe we can find things together that we can’t find alone.”

He nodded, pulling out his chair and settling into it, “I would appreciate that, thank you.”

You smiled, nodding once in his direction. His eyes were already back on the files before you had even turned to leave. Something about this case bothered him, deeply, and you were almost certain you knew what it was.

Ever since Foyet came and destroyed nearly everything Aaron loved, particular cases weighed on his mind a bit heavier. It all came down to justice. Hotch couldn’t stand to see anyone or anything come in the way of true justice. You weren’t completely sure as to how Hailey’s death or George Foyet could have sparked this, you only knew of how angry Aaron would get now if anyone stood in his way.

You entered the corner store, heading straight to the hot coffee by the drink station. The fluorescent lighting only irritated the headache you had been fighting for the past hour, but you just ignored the pain as you came to a stop in front of the industrial sized coffee maker. You pulled two large, styrofoam cups from the dispenser, filling one to the very top with rich, black coffee, for Hotch. The steam billowing from the cup made your lips twitch up into a smile, the thought of caffeine beginning to change your mood for the better. Quickly making your own cup of self motivation, you moved towards the check out counter, the employee behind it looking just as tired as you felt.

“Just those?” She asked, finger already tapping away on the screen before her. You pulled a PayDay (Aaron’s favorite candy bar), from the small display on the counter and placed it next to the coffees.

“And that,” you answered politely, “thank you.” Your eyes wandered over the small keychains and magnets displayed on the counter. Most read ‘HOUSTON’ in large, colorful lettering, while others were decorated with horses and huge, green fields. Your head tilted as you looked, and a particular keychain caught your eye.

It was silver, sparkling subtly in the harsh lighting. You reached out and pulled it from behind the ‘HOUSTON’ keychains, the small cowboy hat resting on the ends of your fingers. Your eyebrows furrowed as you thought, becoming completely entranced by the small trinket.

“That one’s real popular,” the employee drawled, her southern accent pulling at her words, “everyone wants to be a cowboy, these days.”

“I see,” you replied quietly, still staring at the keychain.

“It’ll be $2.38 for those coffees and candy, ma’am.”

You shook your head, snapping out of your trance, “Yes, of course, sorry.” A nervous laugh left your lips as you reached for your wallet, the silver hat falling away from your hand. Quickly handing her a five dollar bill, you grabbed the coffee cups and candy bar before she even managed to open the register. “Keep the change, thank you!”

You almost ran out the door, needing to get to Hotch immediately.

***

“Hotch!” You all but burst into the conference room, kicking the door shut behind you, “I think I might have something!”

He looked up at you, slightly startled by your sudden entrance (but he would never admit it), “What is it?”

You almost laughed at how calm he sounded in comparison to how loudly your heart was pounding in your ears. Promptly setting his coffee and PayDay in front of him, you yanked a chair over until the armrest clinked against Hotch’s chair, then sat and set your own coffee down.

“Remember what JJ said about the costumes, on the plane?” You asked excitedly.

“Something about looking like an old Western-“

“Exactly!” You interrupted, “I might be jumping to conclusions, but the gun, the scalping, the race of our targets,” you counted your list on your fingers as you spoke, “I think our Unsub’s fantasy includes him being a cowboy. Like, a heroic, wild west cowboy.”

He nodded, eyebrows dipping as he thought it over, “That would explain the extreme sadism,” he added, “the narrative of most of those shows are cowboys versus Indians.”

“So,” you took a quick sip of your coffee, “maybe we should be looking for other murders that included any type of rope, gun- hell, even something like a horse.”

“That will help narrow it down,” he agreed.

“And! I almost forgot!” You couldn’t contain yourself, “Ranches, farms- they’re huge pieces of land that would be a very smart location to torture someone quietly.”

“We need to call Garcia,” he said, pulling his phone out of his pocket quickly, “and (Y/N)?”

“Hm?”

“Good work, really,” his hand rested on your shoulder, “but I’ve never expected any less.”

Before you even had a chance to respond, his phone was to his ear, and he was asking Garcia to narrow her search to the new parameters you had discovered. He rose and walked toward the board, looking over the crime scene photos, hand resting on his hip, as he talked. You just sat still, shoulder burning where his hand had laid, heart pounding in your ears. The warmth of his compliment surrounded you, making your cheeks hot and your mind fuzzy. A smile slowly edged it’s way onto your face, your shoulders rising as you held your coffee a bit closer, trying desperately to keep that warm feeling inside. You knew how ridiculous it was, to be sent into a full blush over a small compliment- and quite frankly, it was a compliment you heard a lot- but the mere fact that it came from SSA Aaron Hotchner, the man you found yourself think about way too often, made it all that more special.

“Thank you, Garcia,” he hung up the phone, turning to you again, “you should take a break. I can handle this by myself for a while.”

You relaxed back into your chair, taking a slow sip of your coffee, “You first, Hotch.” A smirk found its way to your lips.

“I’m fine.”

“No one ever says that when they’re actually fine.”

He just stared at you for a long moment, gaze narrowing slightly.

“You’re not going to budge on this, are you?” He asked.

“Not an inch,” the smirk never left your face. A smile of his own played on his lips.

“Fine,” he conceded, “but, as soon as Garcia calls back, it’s back to work.”

“Deal,” you nodded, “now, come sit and enjoy your coffee and candy I got you.”

He followed your orders, settling into the chair beside you (which was very close to you), and finally taking a drink of his coffee. A content sigh made his shoulders relax, eyes closing as he set down his cup.

“I never knew coffee from a gas station could taste so good,” he sighed, eyes meeting yours as a content smile settled on his lips.

“You’re welcome,” you teased, nudging his arm with your elbow.

“And this,” he held up the PayDay, “is my favorite. How did you figure that out?”

“Every old man likes PayDays,” you said cheekily, biting down on your lower lip to keep yourself from giggling. His eyes narrowed at you, but his smile only grew.

“I could put in an insubordination complaint right now,” he threatened.

You relaxed in your chair, letting out a noncommittal sigh, “Just show me where to sign, Hotchner.”

He laughed, putting the candy back on the table and shaking his head, “You’re lucky I understand your humor.”

“And it’s one of the reasons why we get along so well, Hotch,” your nudged his shoulder.

He chuckled a bit, his smile settling on his lips. He looked deep in thought, a certain tenseness tightening his shoulders and making a muscle leap in his jaw. You looked over at his hand, noticing how it fiddled with the corner of the candy’s packaging.

“What’s bothering you?” You asked, not really expecting much of an answer. He had opened up to you before, but it had been extremely late at the time, and he was, in that moment, probably more sleep deprived than rational.

He locked eyes with you, staring for a moment before speaking, “I’m sorry you had to talk to Captain McGuire,” he looked away, “and that nothing really came of it.”

“It’s okay,” you reassured, slightly confused as to why he looked so guilty about it, “I did it because he potentially had information that would be useful to us. I’d flirt with every dirtbag in this station if I thought it could help us.”

“I know, and that is what makes you so valuable to this team,” he avoided your eyes, reaching for his cup again, “you’re able to control your own emotions in order to do your job.” He took a sip.

Oh. You thought, that’s it.

“Hotch, you had every right to be angry.”

His eyes snapped to you, unmistakably surprised that you saw through him. Well, maybe he was aware that it wouldn’t be too hard to see what was bothering him, but he wasn’t used to someone just… calling him out completely.

“I was irrational,” he spoke, “unprofessional.”

“If I was in your shoes, I would have acted the same way.” Your hand hesitantly found his arm, palm resting on his bicep and fingers landing on his shoulder. His gaze flickered down to your hand, then met your eyes once again.

“You’re allowed to be human,” you said, softly, “and sometimes, humans have emotions. That’s kind of the whole reason why we have a job.” You giggled a bit as you spoke, trying to show him how ridiculous it was to feel guilty for a perfectly natural and normal reaction.

“Did he bother you too much?” He asked, nodding towards the office of Captain McGuire. You chose to ignore how he had changed to subject.

“No, not really,” your hand fell away from his arm, feeling noticeably colder when contact was lost, “I’ve heard worse from the men I meet at bars.” You chuckled a bit, shaking your head, “You know, you should hear some of the things I say to drunk men that bother me. I think you would find it amusing.”

Of course he would, he would love to hear you put a man in his place. The feisty attitude you saved for those who bothered you was one of his favorite things about you. It never failed to make him smile, wether it was directed at someone else or- on occasion- him. Your demeanor was nothing short of soft and caring, but once someone crossed you, well… hell hath no fury quite like yours.

“I would have to agree with you on that,” he chuckled, finally beginning to loosen up, “but, please, if any of these officers seriously bother you, tell me.”

“Alright,” you held your hands up in mock defense, “but I can’t guarantee that I will hold off on putting my two cents in.”

“I wouldn’t dream of getting in the way of that.”

“Good.” You smiled brightly. He returned it, having to look away before his face began to flush red. He wanted to just reach out and touch you- hold your hand, hug you, anything- but the thought of trying made his hands start to shake. You made him nervous, a feeling that he didn’t feel often, that he didn’t enjoy at all. But, he knew what it meant. He knew that he was far past the point of no return; the future would consist of his complete and utter falling for you. It terrified him, honestly, but it also thrilled him. He knew what love was, he knew how it felt. The ‘great love’ every one always fantasizes over, was a love he had already experienced. And God, was he determined to feel that again. Not always- he wasn’t always in the pursuit of love- but ever since he met you, that perspective changed.

But it still was frightening, the thought of loving you. He had experienced love, but he also had experienced loss. He knew that letting you take full control of his heart would be putting himself at risk of extreme, unimaginable pain. Pain that he never wished to feel again. Pain that he wouldn’t wish on his worst enemy. It was a dangerous, terrible gamble, the game of love. On one hand, he would be sacrificing himself in the constant war he fought with vulnerability, but on the other hand, he could mend the still broken pieces of his heart and be whole again.

The shrill ringing of your phone pulled him away from his internal battles, his brown eyes finding your (Y/E/C) ones.

“Garcia,” you breathed out, promptly answering and putting the phone on speaker. “You’re with me and Hotch, Pen, what’d you find?”

“Hello my lovely lady and sir, I have two potential victims for you,” she answered, the indistinct clicking of a keyboard in the background. “I narrowed the search with everything you gave me, then again to any murders that took place Thursday through Saturday.”

“The same time frame he’s using now,” Hotch added.

“Exactly. That search left me with two names,” she paused a moment, probably pulling up the case files on her screens, “Kenneth Thompson, 35, died six weeks ago by a single gunshot wound to the chest, and his body was found in his apartment, with his limbs hogtied, like a cow… or a little piggy.”

“His race?” You asked.

“White, which doesn’t match our latest victims, but I have more,” the clicking was heard again,

“Carlos Dominguez, a 32 year old hispanic man, found four weeks ago, dead, by a single gunshot would. But, there are also reports of deep lacerations to his hairline area.”

“So, he tried to carry out his fantasy, but it quickly died when he couldn’t ignore that Carlos was hispanic.” You suggested.

“He always favored the shooting,” Hotch said, “but didn’t develop the hatred towards the Native Americans until his third victim.”

“Or rather, he just realized that he couldn’t use surrogates for them. He needs the real thing.”

“That explains the development of the thumb removal- if he kills Natives with the belief of an afterlife, then he can’t let them go to their version of heaven. It wasn’t necessary for the first two victims.”

“He makes them suffer, even in death,” you shook your head, completely disgusted, “thank you, Garcia.” You hung up the phone, placing it back on the table and leaning back into your chair. Your eyes eventually found Hotch, whose elbow sat on the tabletop, his jaw cupped in his hand.

“I think we need to call the team back in here,” you said quietly. He checked the watch on his wrist briefly, then returned his hand to his chin.

“They have fifteen minutes, let them have it.” He muttered.

***

Briefing the team when they returned was anything but nice. They stood around the conference table once more, as Hotch told them about the new victims and the Unsub’s MO. Revealing and analyzing the true sadism of this Unsub was something that even Emily struggled with. The more the team learned, the more motivated they were to stop him.You could see them all getting visibly more distraught the more you told them.

“So, this guy is just playing cowboy?” Derek asked, anger evident in his voice.

“‘Playing cowboy’ is a very tame way to put it,” Emily scoffed.

“How do we even go about trying to find this guy?” JJ asked, arms crossed over her chest.

“We can start with farmland,” Dave suggested, “single out any that are secluded, or on very large pieces of land.”

“Let’s call Garcia,” you said, taking your phone out of your pocket.

“How big would a farm have to be in order to be secluded enough for this Unsub to operate?” Emily wondered.

“If we take into the fact that the Unsub is probably firing a gun on his property,” Spencer began, fingers intertwining together as he thought, “and, a football field- without the end zones- are roughly 1.38 acres, or 60,112.8 square feet, I would say you would need at least four or five acres to conceal that type of noise.”

“What can I do for you, Holmes?” Garcia chirped through the phone.

“We need you to pull land deeds- look for any farms with at least four acres of land, within the comfort zone,” you said, holding the phone near your voice.

“Got it,” she began typing away, “oh, my- well, you have 143 matches, my dear.”

“You said he hogtied his first victim,” Dave pointed towards you, “Garcia, narrow it down to farms that have cow and/or pigs on them. He had to learn how to tie a knot like that somewhere.”

“You have a brilliant mind, my Italian Stallion,” Garcia praised, “we’re down to 87.”

“How many of those also have horses?” Emily asked, “Can’t be a cowboy without a horse.”

“22.”

“That’s still too many,” you sighed. Hotch laid his palms flat on the conference table, head bowing in defeat.

“We’re missing something,” Spencer mumbled, walking towards the evidence board with narrowed eyes. His head tilted as he stared at it, mouthing words to himself silently.

“What do you see, kid?” Derek asked, taking a step towards Spencer.

“The gun,” he responded, finally.

“The gun?” Morgan questioned. Before getting an answer, Reid had whipped around towards the phone.

“Garcia, the first two victims, what did they conclude about the gun used?” He spoke quickly.

“Um,” she typed just as fast, “it was registered, but reported stolen two weeks prior by 62 year old Harvey Pooler… oh no, Pooler died four days before Kenneth was killed. Heart attack.”

“Did Pooler own a farm?” Spencer asked.

“Let me… see,” a small gasp came through the phone, “He did.”

“Take a 50 mile radius from the Pooler farm and cross that with our 22 potentials.”

There was a couple seconds of typing before she spoke again, “We have a hit. Five acres owned by a Timothy Locke.”

“What do you have on him?” Emily pressed.

“He lived there his whole life,” Garcia spoke quickly, “mother died when he was young, father was… well, not the best father. Multiple trips to the ER when Timothy was still little Timmy.”

“Where’s the father now?” Hotch asked.

“Dead,” she answered shortly, “Month and a half ago, natural causes.”

“That’s right when the killings began,” Rossi observed.

“There’s our stressor,” JJ added.

“What about hobbies? Places he frequented? Anything to tie him to the cowboy fantasy,” You asked.

“Besides his ownership of horses,” Garcia clicked away on her keypad, “he was a frequent flyer of the local rodeo, even participated in it… oh no.”

“What is it, babygirl?” Morgan asked worriedly.

“This particular rodeo, well, it was more of a reenactment type of show,” she explained, “most of their ‘historical retellings’ were that of the wild, wild west. The racist, kill the Natives, wild, wild, west.”

“Garcia-“ Hotch began.

“Oh, honey, I know. Addresses are sent… now.”

“Let’s go,” Hotch said, everyone starting to hurry out of the room.

“Be safe, my loves!” Garcia called.

“Love you, Penny, great work,” you told her, before hanging up and following your team towards the SUVs.

***

The kevlar vest reading ‘FBI’ hung on your shoulders, the slight weight grounding you completely in the events that were about to occur. You glanced over to Hotch- who was staring straight at the dirt road with both hands on the wheel- then looked over your shoulder at Reid and Emily in the backseat, nodding at them slightly before facing forward once again. Your heart was already racing with adrenaline, the rhythmic beat loud in your ears.

Emily glanced out the window, eyes scanning over the seemingly endless fields surrounding the many farms in the area. It all looked so peaceful, the way the green blades stretched towards a crystal blue sky, it was almost heartbreaking that such awful, heinous deaths had occurred on the very same land.

Spencer was leaned over slightly to see out of the front windshield, eyebrows pulled downwards and lips set in a serious frown. He was scanning for a farmhouse, a shed, anywhere that someone could keep another person hostage. The three of you were already driving on the property, just looking for the specific spot where the Unsub operated.

“Over there,” Spencer pointed to the right, a small, white, wooden house coming into view. Hotch turned sharply down a dirt road that shot off the main one, hoping it would lead up to the farmhouse Spencer had spotted.

It wasn’t long before the vehicle stopped, the four of you swiftly jumping from your seats, meeting Dave, JJ, and Morgan as they also left their SUV. You looked up at the farmhouse, eyes squinting slightly from the now rising sun. It was large enough to be comfortable for two, maybe three, people, with a front porch that lead to the entrance. It was two stories, a small, round window sitting on the front and center of the house. The white of the painted wood seemed to illuminate in the orange of an awakening sun, and you could’ve called it beautiful, if you weren’t aware of the horrors that took place inside.

“What’s our plan?” Emily asked, facing Hotch.

“We’re going to do a soft entry,” he began, “Morgan, Reid, and JJ will lead in the front, Dave and I will go around the back. Prentiss, (Y/L/N), there’s a cellar to the right, take some SWAT officers with you, but I want you to clear below.”

“You got it, boss,” you nodded, turning and calling over two SWAT members.

“Alright,” Hotch drew his gun, “Let’s go.”

You and Emily moved alongside Derek, Spencer, and JJ, breaking off as they closed in on the front door. You reached the doors of the cellar, looking over at Emily. She looked back at you, smiling slightly and offering a reassuring nod before grabbing ahold of the handle on the left door. You took a deep breath and grabbed the other one, looking back to Emily once more.

“One,” she counted softly, “two… three.”

You both simultaneously lifted the doors, the two-man SWAT team moving forward, descending the stairs before you and Emily. You were close behind, guns raised. Your flashlight moved around the room, finding it to be mostly empty, save for a few cardboard boxes in the corner. You turned to your right, finding a door tucked away by the staircase.

“Emily,” you alerted, “we have a door.”

She moved over to stand beside you, “Boys, over here,” she beckoned the SWAT officers, nodding toward the door with her head.

They approached slowly and quietly, taking position on each side of the doorframe. One reached out and placed a soft hand on the doorknob, waiting three seconds before turning it and pushing it open, immediately drawing their weapons in from of them as they cleared the small room. You and Emily followed them in once again, your eyes going straight to the unconscious man in the very middle of the floor. His head hung, arms bound behind him and legs bound to the chair he was sat in. His shoulders slumped, his hair stringy, and a small trail of blood trickled down his forehead.

You rushed towards him, the light flickering on as you knelt down beside him. Emily’s hand left the light switch and moved to the restraints on the man’s hands, working quickly at the knots. With gentle pressure, you pushed your fingers on his neck, breathing out a sigh of relief when you felt a pulse beneath them.

“We need a medic in the cellar,” you spoke into your radio, keeping your fingertips against the man’s pulse and taking a silent count of how many beats passed every minute.

“Sir?” Emily asked, finally untying his hands, “Sir? Can you hear me?” She had to hold onto his shoulders to keep him from slumping completely forward.

“We found the hostage, Hotch,” you said into your comm device, “currently unresponsive, we have medics en route.”

There was no answer.

“Hotch?”

Silence. You looked up at Emily, whose worried expression matched yours.

“Hotch,” she tried, “can you hear me?”

Nothing.

“Hotch, Reid, Morgan,” you spoke quickly, “JJ, Rossi, do you copy?”

Radio silence.

“Stay with him,” you said, quickly rising to your feet.

“(Y/N), what are you-“

“You,” you pointed at one of the SWAT members, “come with me.”

“You can’t just go up there- (Y/N)!”

You ignored Emily’s protests, jogging up the stairs of the cellar, the SWAT officer right behind you. Holding your gun in front of you, you turned left, heading towards the back of the house. Reaching the back door, you slowly crept up the stairs, clearing right as the SWAT member cleared left. The first room was the kitchen, small and vintage, then you passed into a living room, with purple couches sitting in front of an ancient TV. Cowboy themed decor hung on every square inch of the walls, ranging from horseshoes to framed photographs of Western icons, such as John Wayne. You moved through the room, turning left through a doorway, which led to the entrance of the house. Pink and yellow sunlight leaked through the glass detailing at the top of the door, illuminating the staircase that sat almost directly in front of it. The SWAT officer appeared on the other side of the entryway, nodding towards you in a silent was of saying ‘all clear’. You nodded back, allowing him to ascend the stairs before you, his boots creaking slightly against the steps.

As you neared the top of the stairs, you could hear the low voice that plagued your every thought, the voice that talked to you in your best dreams and worst nightmares, always speaking of comfort and serenity.

“Timothy, we just want to talk-“

A sickening, teasing laugh cut Aaron off, the unmistakable sound of heeled boots tapping against the floor echoing through the house.

“We both know that’s not why you’re here, officer,” a southern accent laced through his words, his voice dark and deep.

You crept towards the voices, which were carrying down the hall. One door was open, down near the end and to the right. With quiet steps, you made your way towards it. You held your hand out toward the SWAT member, having him stop a few feet behind you. Placing yourself at the edge of the doorframe, back passed firmly against the wall, you dared to peek your head into the room.

That’s when the smell started to hit you. It was rotten, pungent, and… familiar. Your nose crinkled, eyebrows furrowing as you tried to understand why you recognized something so awful. Then, you realized.

The smell of death.

Your eyes scanned over the walls, stopping at a far corner. Hanging from the ceiling were the three scalps that were taken from your victims, a silver bullet casing tied up with each one of them. You took in a shaky breath, trying to stop yourself from hearing their screams, or picturing the way they looked as they were tortured.

Shaking your head to clear those thoughts, you turned your attention back to your team.

The Unsub’s back was to you, JJ held firmly in a chokehold with his left arm, his right hand holding a revolver with the barrel pressed to her temple. Hotch, Morgan, and Reid stood in a semi-circle in front of him, guns all drawn and aimed.

“You don’t have to do this, man,” Morgan bargained.

“Of course I do,” Timothy Locke, the Unsub, laughed again, “if I have her,” he shook JJ slightly, “then I have a chance of leaving here alive.”

You moved your head out a little more, catching Hotch’s eye. Looking between you and Timothy, he nodded, ever so slightly. You knew what he meant, you didn’t need his words to know what you had to do.

Quickly, you switched to the left side of the doorframe, positioning yourself to enter the room without Locke seeing you.

“Putting the gun down and surrendering will get you out of here alive,” Spencer urged, clearly distraught that the Unsub was holding a gun to his best friend’s head.

“And you would love it if I did just that, wouldn’t ya?” Locke sneered, readjusting his grip on his gun slightly.

You slipped into the room silently, gun raised and steps slow. Hotch’s eyes flicked to you every few seconds, his expression- hardened and serious, but what else is new- unchanging.

“We know what your dad used to do to you,” Hotch said lowly, catching the attention of Timothy.

“You don’t know shit.”

“We know of the hospital visits, the broken bones. We know that you were left alone with him after your mother died,” Aaron’s voice was unfaltering, purposely trying to irritate Locke.

It was working.

“I said,” he hissed, “you don’t know shit.”

“Then enlighten me.”

Timothy took a deep breath in before speaking, “Do you know what happened in this house? Between these walls? How every time I wasn’t good enough or smart en-“ his hands swung out to the side as he talked, his anger getting the best of him. In one swift movement, his right arm had extended away from JJ, and you were holstering your own gun and lunging for Locke’s weapon.

You pushed his arm backwards, his hand tightening from the surprise. A single gunshot rang out, and a searing pain ripped through your left arm, causing you to cry out. JJ moved out of his grasp, which had loosened significantly, turning towards him and kicking his left knee inward, making him sink to the floor. You pressed your right hand to the hole in your arm in an attempt to stop the bleeding, using the last bit of adrenaline in your body to swing your leg up and connect your foot to the face of Timothy Locke, making contact with a sickening crack, rendering him unconscious. He was down before Derek, Spencer, and Aaron had even moved forward- it had to be less than ten seconds.

Spencer reached you first, pressing his palm over your hand, applying more pressure as your grip started to loosen and your fingers slipped from beneath his.

“Look at me, (Y/N), look at me,” he ordered. You tried to, but your head was dizzying and you were having a hard time keeping your eyes open.

“You’re going to go into shock,” he spoke quickly, “just keep your eyes open, okay?”

After cuffing Locke and checking in with JJ, Hotch rushed towards you, reaching you just as your knees buckled and gave out from below you. His arms held you steady, his knees bending as he slowly sank down to the floor with you.

“I- I don’t think the artery was hit, but there’s a lot of bleeding, so I’m not su-“

“Reid.” Hotch interrupted. Spencer’s eyes shifted from you to Hotch, eyebrows turned upwards, nothing but worry in his features.

“Call for medics again,” he instructed Spencer, whose hand was still on your arm, “don’t stop calling until they get here.”

Hotch’s hand replaced Reid’s, his free arm holding you against his chest. Your eyelids still drooped up and down, your battle with sleep being anything but victorious. It was almost like a dream, blurry and vague, with a feeling of unfamiliarity. You weren’t completely aware of what was happening. Hell, you still were not feeling the pain of a bullet passing through your arm. That’s how you knew something was very, very wrong.

“Keep your eyes open,” Hotch spoke, his soft words landing delicately on your ears, “keep looking at me, (Y/N).”

The corner of your mouth tilted slightly, “I got,” you let out a small giggle, high on adrenaline, “I got shot, Hotchie.”

“Yes, I know, honey,” his voice was still soft but by God, was he using all his strength to keep it that way. He fought against the way his heart threatened to leap from his chest, the way his mind became frantic at the sight of your blood painting his fingers crimson, the way he could feel his breaths losing rhythm.

It was through and through, he thought, it will be okay, they will be okay.

And yet, despite his logical thoughts, he felt like he could cry as he held you close.

“Did you get him?” You asked, your words weary and strained.

“We did,” Aaron could only whisper to keep his voice from breaking, “you saved them, (Y/N). Now, just do me one favor and keep your eyes open.”

Your hand shakily covered his, your fingertips delicate they brushed lazily over his knuckles. The small touch brought a small, content smile to your face- and that mad tears reach Aaron’s eyes.

He looked up as the EMTs burst through the door, kits jostling in their hands. Seeing them felt like taking a breath out of water, like he could finally get oxygen in his lungs again. He looked back to your drooping eyes as they pulled you out of his arms, working quickly to stop your bleeding.

He stood and backed away, stumbling over his own feet slightly, his gaze never leaving you. You were moved to a plastic cot, straps securing your head, chest, and legs, as you were lifted from the ground and ushered through the door. Hotch stayed where he was, focus trained on the pool of blood that began to seep into the wooden floor, turning it a dark burgundy. His mind attempted to understand that the stain was, in fact, from your blood. Suddenly, the weight of what he saw everyday piled on his shoulders, from the gruesome photos to the actual victims. He was always aware of their humanity, of their worth, but his jaded mind could look past that and move along. Now, it seemed he couldn’t hide behind compartmentalization and insensitivity.

Sirens chirped outside, the sound floating in through the window, and his head snapped up at the sound.

Flashes began to obscure his vision. He saw the home he shared with Hailey, he saw the smiling and devilish face of George Foyet, he saw the lifeless eyes of the mother of his child, the blood that stained the carpet, the way his fist smashed in Foyet’s cheek, the way Hailey looked when she was gone, the way Jack looked when he asked where she was.

Then he saw you. He saw your smile, the light step of your walk, how delicate your hands looked as you wrote, how you bit your lip if you focused enough, the way your hair caught the light. He saw the sunshine that brought light into his dark, dark life.

The siren chirping once more brought him back to reality.

With his trance broken, he rushed out of the room, steps pounding against the creaky floor and echoing throughout the house. He ran down the stairs, the echos creating a drum roll in his wake as he finally stepped onto the front porch. The ambulance door clicked shut, the EMTs finding their seats before the ambulance sped away, sirens blaring.

He watched you leave until the sun engulfed the ambulance in orange light. His chest was heaving, in and out, mouth hanging open slightly. Suddenly, the kevlar around his torso felt much too tight, his hands finding the velcro and tearing at it. His breathing quickened, the kevlar falling to the ground, but the pressure in his chest still present. Frantically, his finger fumbled with the top button of his shirt, nearly ripping it off in his urgency.

“Aaron?” Dave asked, ascending the porch stairs towards his friend, “Aaron, are you okay?”

“I can’t,” Aaron wheezed, hands pulling down on the collar of his now exposed undershirt, “I can’t breathe-“

“Sit down, sit down,” Dave ushered him to the floor, Aaron practically crumpling into himself, “now, exhale completely.”

Hotch did as he said, shoulders hunching as he let out his breath.

“Now 4 seconds, in through the nose,” Dave followed Aaron’s movements, his hand accentuating his breathing, “hold for 7 seconds,” there was a pause as the two men held their breath, “and now, out for eight.”

Aaron closed his eyes as he exhaled, the tightness of his chest beginning to loosen.

“Keep doing that until you’re ready to talk,” Dave said gently, settling into the floor of the porch while he waited. Hotch completed three more cycles before he opened his eyes. He looked at Dave, eyebrows flicked upward in worry.

“Now,” treading lightly, Dave asked, “what was that about?”

“I don’t know,” Hotch answered quickly, avoiding Dave’s gaze.

“Aaron, the rest of the team may be fooled, but I am not,” Dave began, pointing over his shoulder at the team, “I’ve seen the way you look at them, and the way they look at you.”

That made Hotch’s heart flutter, the thought of you looking at him the same way he looked at you.

“I’m not pushing you to do anything you don’t want to,” Dave defended, “but you already have so many things you keep to yourself, you might have to let this one out.”

Aaron sighed, jaw clenching slightly, “I know.”

“Good,” Dave smiled, patting Hotch on the shoulder before getting up and walking away, preparing to fend off the rest of the team and their questions. Hotch was on his feet just as quickly, rebuttoning his shirt and retrieving his kevlar. His face had returned to the stoic expression everyone was used to, but his pulse was still racing.

***

“The doctor says they will be okay,” Derek told the team, taking a seat beside Spencer, “they’ve been moved to recovery; we can visit once they’re awake.”

Everyone nodded, a gloom hanging densely in the air. The team knew you would be okay, in all reality. Spencer had been sure to spout off a multitude of statistics to prove that a shot in the arm, avoiding the brachial artery, was survivable. But, despite the logical comfort, Hotch could only remember the way you looked, bleeding and incoherent in his arms. The bright, lively red of your blood on his hands was an image that would stain his mind as permanently as the very same blood stained the wooden floor of that house. He figured he could add it to his endless collection of gruesome images that lived in his brain, but he also knew he was a fool if he thought he could compartmentalize that away.

His elbows leaned against his knees, hands coming to a steeple upon his lips. The lines beneath his eyes grew deeper with every passing hour, but he remained in the same position, just as quiet. When it came to his thoughts- in particular, the dark, intrusive thoughts that came to him when the sun went down- he was fairly good at navigating through them, keeping them from degrading his worth as a human and protector. However, as he sat in the uncomfortable, plastic chair of the hospital you were a patient of, he could only think of how many people had been hurt (or worse), because of him. He could only see the way Reid cried as Tobias Hankel tortured him, the way JJ broke when he told her he couldn’t protect her job, the betrayal in Morgan’s eyes when he realized he had buried an empty casket, the beaten and bruised face of Emily after Benjamin Cyrus found out she was FBI.

But then, he saw Hailey. He saw her lying, dead, on the ground of the bedroom they had once shared, the room in which they had decided what to name their child, the room they laughed and cried in, the room they had loved in. She gave him everything he had to live for- his son.

Then he saw you. Dipping in and out of consciousness, calling him nicknames and smiling as you bled onto the floor. The way you giggled and called him ‘Hotchie’ was a happy image spliced into a bigger picture that made bile raise into his throat.

Lastly, he saw George Foyet. At least, what had been left of him. He remembered how he didn’t even feel his knuckles split open as they collided with Foyet’s face. It scared him, truly, how he didn’t stop, even after George was gone. It scared him how he would’ve stayed there, killing a man that was already dead, if Derek hadn’t pulled him away. The broken, mangled face of The Reaper haunted him the most.

A hand on his shoulder pulled him away from his thoughts, his eyes reaching upwards to see who it belonged to.

“You in there, boss?” Emily chuckled, a dazzling smile on her face.

“Uh, yes,” he nodded once, clearing his throat as he stood. He smoothed down his shirt, suit jacket having been abandoned long ago. In vain, he tried to look like he hadn’t been caught off guard.

“They’re not awake yet, but the nurse said we can go see them, if you’d like.”

He nodded, blinking twice as her words processed in his overworked mind, “Lead the way.”

His strong facade was held together by bubblegum and paperclips when he entered your hospital room. The way you looked so serene- with your eyelashes resting upon your cheeks and your shoulders completely relaxed- it was almost overwhelming. It was only hours earlier that he watched that same face contract in pain, those same eyelashes flutter in an attempt to stay awake.

He stayed by the door as the team found their place around your bed, his hands finding themselves in his pockets and his eyebrows pulling downwards, like they always do. His heart physically ached beneath his chest, its beat no longer the allegro of anxiety, but the slow waltz of failure. He had failed you- failed to protect you, failed to keep you safe. Imagining where that bullet could have landed made it all the worse.

It was bittersweet, really, the way you made him feel. There was a sunshine, a happiness that you infected those around you with. Your warmth was a gift you gave to everyone you met, regardless of who the were or what they’ve done. You would pull the hurt and forgotten from the earth without questioning their origin, your delicate hands caressing them gently with the comfort they’ve never known. You spoke words that covered the listener like summer rain, moved in a way that mimicked the lithe movement of dandelions in the breath of spring. He would surrender himself to you in the way the tides surrender to the moon, and a small part of him knew he already had.

He would give what little of himself remained, if you’d asked. The thunderstorms and lightening he had journeyed through had washed away pieces of him, leaving an otherness that felt all too unfamiliar, that stared right back at him whenever he looked in a mirror. But, regardless of how much he lost of himself, no matter how withered he became, all of it would be yours, if you’d asked. Because, despite the darkness that engulfed his waking moments and controlled the rest, you were always beside him, with a candle to light the way. And for that, he would promise to love you with everything inside him, despite the raindrops that dance on his feet.

If you’d asked.

But, you wouldn’t, he knew, so he wouldn’t fall in love with you. He couldn’t. His heart was tired, weary, and weak. The thought of loving you- in the jumping-from-a-cliff-but-laughing-as-you-fall kind of way, because allowing himself to love you would open a floodgate- and potentially losing you; that was a trauma he couldn’t see himself recovering from. He didn’t have the strength to. So, he would reside in the outskirts of your life, keeping himself close enough to feel the warmth you radiated, but far enough to feel a chill trace his spine.

And that’s exactly what he did. He stayed near the doors of your hospital room, looking silently as the team conversed lightly with your sleeping ears, hoping you would hear their words despite your lack of consciousness. He could hear their gentle whispers, the way they teased each other, the gentle laughs they exchanged. He stood in a room of people that loved and were loved, each of their hearts clean of the bruises that riddled his.

He doesn’t remember when he left, or how he ended up in the George Bush Intercontinental Airport, but he was seated in an airplane seat, staring out to the wisps of clouds and star-spotted sky, mind empty and full all at once.

***

Your eyes slowly pried themselves open, the bright, white light overwhelming your senses momentarily. A groan left your mouth, eyelids dropping once again, your head tilting towards your pillow.

“Good morning, sleeping beauty,” the voice of Derek Morgan teased, a small smile coming to your lips.

“Am I in heaven?” You croaked out, “I think I hear the voice of an angel.”

“You’re too good to me, (Y/N),” he laughed, his hands gently patting yours. You opened your eyes again with a sigh, looking around the room at your team.

“You had us worried there, kiddo,” JJ chuckled.

“Sorry,” you grimaced, “I didn’t mean to get shot, I swear.”

“Well,” Spencer spoke up from his chair beside the hospital bed, “don’t ever do it again.”

“Pinky promise.”

“Yeah, leave the dying to me,” Emily joked, earning a weak laugh from you.

You looked around at your family, the people you loved most in the life you had, and you hid the disappointment you felt because one was missing.

***

Aaron entered his apartment, shoulders heavy as he set his briefcase by the door. He turned to find Jessica asleep on the couch, hands tucked beside her head. He walked towards her, pulling a blanket from the back of the cushions and draping it over her. She stirred slightly, but settled quickly.

He moved numbly, putting his gun away securely and removing the belt around his waist. Walking towards the bedroom down the hall, his shoes were kicked off and his dress shirt was discarded, leaving him in slacks, socks, and his white undershirt.

With a low creak, his eyes peeked through Jack’s barely open door to find him sleeping soundly in his bed, the dark blue comforter pulled up to his chin. Aaron stepped into the room fully, closing the door softly behind him. Carefully, he climbed into the bed beside his son, settling into the pillows. Jack reacted immediately, curling under his dad’s arm. With a small kiss to the little boy’s forehead, Aaron allowed himself to fall asleep, willing away the darkness of the day. Pushing the twisted thoughts away, his mind concentrated on the boy in his arms, and the incredible love he held for him.

#aaron hotchner imagines #hotch x reader #hotch #criminal minds #angst #this is so long im so sorry #I hope y'all are ready to READ

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silver-wield · 4 years

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I’m sorry in advance. This is a long rant. I think the main reason I can't accept this "SOLDIER!Cloud loves A” thing is because I've always felt that the whole love triangle nonsense was introduced solely to make the players invested in A. Let's face it, the biggest reason people were devastated when she died is because they were invested in her potential romance with Cloud. It was the easiest and cheapest way to make sure the devs achieved their goal. (1/5)

But in their desperation to reach that goal at any cost, the devs ended up damaging other things along the way. Having Tifa in the background until A was out of the picture was such a dumb move. It’s obvious they didn’t want any other character to outshine her. Creating this illusion of Cloud loving A served no purpose in the story. And Aerith herself didn’t bond with anyone save for Cloud. These among many other things. To me, all that wavering thing was so unnecessary to the narrative. (2/5)

Things felt rushed, and A was put on a pedestal and shoved in the players’ faces along with the potential romance with her. It was clear to me that the devs just wanted people to like her so that they’d be devastated when she died. But I guess you can’t ask for too much of games/stories back in 1997. I’m sorry, but I just can’t accept people saying that SOLDIER!Cloud loved A. They hadn’t known each other that long, and 95% of the time, they had other things on their plate than romance. (3/5)

It’s not like they were dating or getting to know each other during the brief time they spent together. Also, I don’t mean to offend anyone, but saying the LTD is now ending because A is stepping out and pushing Cloud onto Tifa sounds so insulting. Like Tifa can’t win unless her competition steps out and hands her the man on a silver platter. This time around, I feel that the devs are trying to do things properly. A is finally taking the time to bond with other characters, especially Tifa. (4/5)

Her world doesn’t revolve around Cloud only anymore. Tifa is not in the background anymore, so now people can get to know her and get attached to her even early on. The romance with Tifa isn’t something that feels like it’s come out of the left field about 2/3 of the way in. There might’ve been hints but they were too subtle. Among many other improvements. Whatever the devs do, I just hope they give us the best version possible of the story this time around. Thanks for listening to my rant.(5/5)

Death to the LTD 1

Death to the LTD 2 (dialogue evolution)

Death to the LTD 3 (soldier Cloud’s acceptance)

Cloud’s hyper vigilance

That would be because the concept absolutely was introduced to make the players more invested in Aerith, so her death had a harder hit when it happened. It was a new thing back in 97 to have a love triangle and pretty much everybody was starting to do it. There’s tons of movies, tv series and books out during that time that showcase the trope.

And having 2 heroines, Aerith and Tifa, and having the hero waver between them, at the time that was something new. ~Kitase, FFVII 10th Anniversary Ultimania pg. 11

I think everyone forgets the difference in technology between FF6 and FF7, not just graphically, but narratively, too. Back then, everything was new and everyone was still trying to find their feet and figure out evolving technology. I mean, it’s still evolving now, but those building blocks that form the base are still the same. Just because there’s now millions of polygons involved doesn’t take away the fact they’re still polygons.

FF7 was Square’s first foray into using more sophisticated methods of game development and that impacted how the story came across. In previous games, the optional content or hidden story arcs that had to be found to be appreciated made the game more fun. The player had to wander around more and talk to everyone to get the full picture and since it worked before, they thought it’d work again. That people would replay and swap party members around to trigger the other scenes and gather the rest of the puzzle pieces for the fuller picture.

But, they forgot they were trying to make everyone love one specific character, which meant the best way to do that was to keep her in the party over everyone else. Which meant people cared less about the others until the point she leaves the party for good. And by that point, when these people replay they just want to spend even more time with her, so they still miss the other dialogues and scenes with other characters that build their storyline alongside this other character they’ve pressed everyone to care about.

And that’s how the LTD got started because they chose not to play the game fully and only focus on one character, they didn’t see the entire picture. And the guides out at the time didn’t help much on that side of things because they didn’t give narrative canon party suggestions so that players got the most out of the story in each location.

Soldier Cloud loved Aerith?

Really? When they’ve been saying for years that soldier Cloud didn’t even exist or that we said he was really Zack and that’s why he’s into Aerith? It’s funny how the moment the devs confirm that real Cloud emerged to embrace Tifa they decided they could claim the dominant persona for their own, even though they also said that it was soldier Cloud who complimented Tifa, despite real Cloud not being the dominant persona. We even see visible evidence of the two aspects at war with each other in the honeybee inn scene before Cloud dances. That eye movement back and forth and expression of “fine, for Tifa” is an internal argument with the two aspects that soldier Cloud isn’t aware enough of to realise that’s what it is. If we take Soldier Cloud as the only personality then there’s no way he’d do that because it’s not cool, and soldier Cloud is always cool. He’s being made to dance because of real Cloud’s desire to rescue Tifa.

Aerith steps out...

Yeah, I wouldn’t phrase it like that, but the overall sentiment is that Aerith is refusing to do what happened in OG.

More importantly, though, and the thing I focused on in my death to the LTD, is Cloud’s behaviour and reaction and feelings. Because he’s soldier Cloud. Real Cloud isn’t part of the LTD because he already chose Tifa. Soldier Cloud is the focus of the LTD because he’s the one who misinterpreted real Cloud’s feelings and focused them on the wrong girl. This time, we see clear evidence throughout all of his interactions that he is also choosing Tifa.

In the train tunnel, while it’s real Cloud’s motivation to protect Tifa, Soldier Cloud is the one who carries out the roll. Then, it’s Soldier Cloud who kisses her cheek, the same as it’s Soldier Cloud who calls her beautiful. Because he’s the one flirting. Real Cloud’s desire is the motivator for him to do it, but it’s Soldier Cloud doing the thing. Same with every single flirty interaction. Real Cloud’s emergence is only confirmed by the devs twice in the game and both times relate to Tifa. Real Cloud’s hand twitches with the urge to comfort her and then real Cloud hugs her.

Everything else is only motivated by his love and desire for her, which means everything else is Soldier Cloud acting on those feelings.

The single moment of wavering from him is literally within the LTD nod scene in the train graveyard when Aerith grabs his arm. He doesn’t react when she does it, stays silent, leans away. He’s not showing her a preference. Then, he looks at and agrees with Tifa, which is showing a clear bias towards her.

Then right before Tifa grabs Cloud’s arm, his eyes start to shift towards Aerith. This is the reference to OG Cloud wavering, but then before he can even look at Aerith, he spots Tifa’s hands in his peripheral vision, gasps, then looks at and smiles at her.

That’s the result of Cloud’s wavering. He chose Tifa. After that, there’s zero LTD scenes and in fact, there’s a humorous shot of Tifa looking towards the camera after Cloud leaps on her to save her from the falling train carriage and Aerith thanks him for saving both of them. He didn’t save both of them. Didn’t even try.

I don’t think there’s gonna be anything to worry about going forward because one thing Nojima learned from letting things be “open for interpretation” is that his work gets butchered.

Since FF7, other FF titles he’s worked on -

FF8: Squall and Rinoa kiss.

FF10: Yuna and Tidus kiss.

FFCC: Aerith and Zack hug

FF13: Snow and Serah kiss and get engaged.

FF15 (when it was originally vs): Noctis and Luna kiss.

If anyone learned their lesson from this LTD mess, it’s Nojima, but he’s been restricted when it comes to 7 by the suits - which is one of the hidden graffiti meta messages in the train tunnel that refers to why Cloti was never made more explicit.

“They tell you to go with the flow so they can keep the status quo.”

Since this is the last of the FF7 compilation the suits have relaxed the reins on the LTD, so that Nojima can write the story as he sees fit, which I would guess is down to the fact they did sales projections and figured out that FF7 would be massively successful and has in fact also boosted sales of PS4 consoles because people specifically bought the console to play FF7R. With the new mysteries and twists to keep fans talking about the game until the next installment is out, they don’t need to hold onto this outdated LTD concept that everyone hates and isn’t anything the company wants to associate with because of how toxic and nasty it is. They’re a Japanese company having to hear these so called fans talking about how Tifa is a “typical Asian girl” or whatever tf they call her. It’s disgusting. Square yeeted the guys behind Genesis because of the controversy around them, so to have fans like this associated with one of their most popular and iconic titles? Yeah, that ain’t happening.

#Death to the LTD #for the fandom

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wonderfulworldofmichaelford · 4 years

Text

Michael After Midnight: Heavy Metal

Sometimes it’s fun to revisit old movies you watched when you were younger and find out, hey, this is better than you remembered! Sometimes your young mind just wasn’t ready to accept how awesome something was, and you needed time to fully understand what you look for and like about cinema to truly appreciate it. But then, sometimes, you watch something you liked when you were younger, and you realize… wow, this is absolute dog shit!

Such is the case with Heavy Metal. This is a movie I have frequently cited as a low-ranking entry on lists of the finest animated films of all time, and to be entirely fair to the film, it is important in a historical sense, being a cult classic that was passed around through bootlegs because music rights kept it from getting a home video release, and it came out around the dawn of the 80s and kind of destroyed what you would think an animated film was capable of. This film is full of sex, drugs, and rock and roll, and it entirely, unabashedly unashamed of this, for better or for worse.

Now, while I do think the overall film is a bit lacking, it is an anthology film divided into segments, and there are some pretty good ones I will make note of; this is not a film with absolutely no merit. But before that, let me point out the one thing everyone can agree is amazing about this film: the soundtrack. You’ve got Black Sabbath, Blue Oyster Cult, Stevie Nicks, Devo, Cheap Trick… if nothing else, the kickass soundtrack is worth a listen, though Blue Oyster Cult’s song inclusion irritates me to a great degree. The movie went with “Veteran of the Psychic Wars” for the soundtrack, despite the fact Blue Oyster Cult had a song ready to go that is literally about the final entry in the anthology, called “Vengeance (The Pact).” Why the people compiling the soundtrack made this choice baffles me; it reminds me of how they didn’t use “Jennifer’s Body” in, well, Jennifer’s Body, instead opting for a different Hole song from the same album.

But I digress. Let’s go one by one and touch on the segments:

The framing device is about an entity known as the Loc-Nar, who claims to be the sum of all evil, detailing to a little girl how it has influenced chaos and carnage across time and space. The thing is, though, the Loc-Nar doesn’t come out on top in any of the segments, and its schemes are often thwarted. So the entire movie is basically this supreme evil being detailing to a little girl how much it sucks ass at its one job.

The first segment is Harry Canyon, a story about the eponymous futuristic New York taxi driver. In some regards it reminds me of The Fifth Element, what with a scruffy, slummy, futuristic taxi driver trying to help a smoking hot babe find out the truth and all, but unlike that film, this short is a lot bleaker and gritty. You kinda know what you’re in for when Harry vaporizes a dude who tries to mug him, and if that’s not enough, the female lead of this short literally throws herslef at him, and yes, he gets to take a dive into her Harry Canyon – and you get to see it.

This is a running theme throughout these shorts – almost every female character has huge titties and is sexually promiscuous, throwing themselves at the first penis they see as if it was their job. It’s so incredibly juvenile and tacky as to be laughable, but I guess this comes with the territory considering the magazine this film adapted.

Anyway, the segment is harmless and unremarkable. It’s exactly what you’d expect from this sort of story, without much in the way of twists or turns.

The second segment, Den, is arguably the best segment in the entire film. We have a nerdy kid named Dan who gets transported across space and becomes the musclebound warrior with a huge cock known as Den. Every woman throws herself at him, every villain in his way gets pummeled, and no task is too impossible for this man! And did I mention that he is voiced by John Candy? Really, Candy’s comedic touch is what makes this entire thing feel fun and palatable; it’s a cheesy swords and sorcery romp through and through. Honestly, I don’t have much bad to say about this one, it’s just very silly fun.

Unfortunately we are back to being not great with Captain Sternn. Sternn, played by Eugene Levy (of The Wacky World of Mini Golf fame), is basically an intergalactic war criminal on trial, and when his paid witness Hanover Fiste (played by Rodger “Squidward Tentacles” Bumpass) comes up to the stand, the Loc-Nar influences him to the most evil act possible… betraying this war criminal in front of the judge and jury! GASP! I’m not sure what the Loc-Nar is really trying to do here; you’d think it would maybe want Sternn free to continue spreading wicked influence across the galaxy, but nah, it just makes Squidward hulk out and tries to kill him, only for the tables to be turned and Squidward to be dropped out an airlock, further cementing how utterly useless the Loc-Nar is.

Thankfully, once that’s over, we have yet another very strong segment, another contender for best in show: B-17. This is a genuinely creepy zombie short film, and the zombies are utterly horrifying and grotesque. This is regarded as the most nightmarish part of the film, and for good reason; this shit is certainly worthy of being called “heavy metal.” Honestly, there isn’t much bad to say about this one either, except perhaps that it is over far too soon.

Then we get to what is probably the worst segment: So Beautiful, So Dangerous. The entire segment is sort of meant to be a lighthearted comedic breather between The last segment and the final one, but it just comes off as combining every problem the movie has into one segment: the uselessness of the Loc-Nar, copious and ridiculous sex, drugs, and so on. Really all that’s missing from this is gratuitous violence, but hey, guess you can’t have everything all the time, right? It just comes off as really dull and pointless, and there’s not really anything particularly funny about anything that happens in it, unless of course you’re a thirteen year old who thinks “big boob woman having sex with robot while aliens snort cocaine” is the funniest shit on Earth.

Thankfully, we end on a strong note with Taarna, which is about a proud warrior woman dressed in horrifically impractical armor (and this actually effects the plot, I’m not kidding, somehow there was some self-awareness here) and a cool alien pteradactly flying off to fulfill a vengeful pact after the slaughter of a peaceful race by barbarians mutated by the Loc-Nar, in what may be the Loc-Nar’s sole impressive feat. Taarna is the ultimate hero, giving us the trifecta of qualities a heroine in this movie should have – boobs, butt, and bush... Er, I mean, sword, cool mount, and ass-kicking prowess. This one is not quite as good as “Den” or “B-17,” but I still think it’s a solid finale that has enough action and awesome music to make up for its tackier elements.

The movie ends with Taarna’s defeat of the Loc-Nar echoing through time and killing it which… makes absolutely zero sense, but whatever, the Loc-Nar is an absolutely atrocious villain and perhaps one of the most useless in cinematic history, he gets a 1/10 on Psycho Analysis. Then the girl gets her own kickass space dragon thing and becoming the new Taarna or something and, honestly, it’s the exact sort of batshit ending you should expect from the film.

So, is this really an awful film? In some places, no. It’s a love letter to cheesy, trashy sci-fi fantasy from the 70s, with all that comes with it, and in that regard it does succeed. But still, a lot of the film feels like the utterly juvenile fantasies of same sad high schooler, or perhaps even middle schooler, who has never had and who likely never will have sex. It’s a tashy little time capsule to a bygone era where this sort of storytelling was okay so long as there was enough blood and titties on display, so if that appeals to you, by all means, check this film out. It’s certainly not the worst thing in the world to watch, but animation has come so far and adult animation in particular is capable of so much more than adolescent masturbatory fantasies that this film has little value beyond a few solid segments and a damn good soundtrack.

Hell, just go listen to the soundtrack. I think you’d have a better time doing that.

#Michael After Midnight #Review #Movie review #Heavy Metal #animation #animated movie #sex drugs and rock and roll

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dongiovannaswife · 5 years

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Legacy; Vampire!Giorno Giovanna x Fem!Reader (Teal and Burgundy prequel.)

Side note (READ AFTER, SPOILERS); Alright, here we go again :3c JJBA is highly characterized by mentioning and playing with concepts such as the correlation between fate, destiny, coincidences, opportunities and luck. In some way, this piece happens around these, playing and suggesting some things (I’m sure you’ll be able to identify which scenes play around which one, dear reader). Here’s a little statement I want to make; the scene where Giorno feels a headache is a callback to Dio using the stone mask. I’m sorry if Jolyne feels out of character, I haven’t read part 6 and for what I’ve seen, she’s portrayed like this by some fans? Idk, sorry. Last, “destiny” was wrote in June, and “Fate”, “Legacy and the unnamed sequel were written between October 23-30 (same year), so the change is pretty noticeable and I feel deeply worried about it, but I think that rewriting “destiny” would be useless, since I feel like the emotions poured in that won’t be replicated this time, and maybe the concept doesn’t ring too good. Anyway, enjoy! Warnings; PTSD mentions, body horror (light, but still, take care), nightmares, blood. Feedback is always appreciated. The slow, pleading, arguing, begging and crying sound of Jeff Beck’ guitar solo during his interpretation of cause we’ve ended up as lovers fills the silence of Giorno Giovanna’s office, don of Passione for eleven years now, bringing a tone of presence to the enormous headquarters he’s in, after giving some of his soldatos a pair of missions and after a long and tiring meeting with La Squadra di Esecuzione. The young don behind the desk, the one who once looked thin and weak has come to hit a growth spurt after turning seventeen, looking like the man of the photo he still carries on his wallet, Dio Brando. A man he doesn’t know about, but one he’s created his own expectations in order to have an image to follow, even if he doesn’t say it out loud; it’s a secret he’s been keeping as deeply intimate, part of the child he never got to be, but that still resides deep within his heart. The non-so typical hairstyle form back then now replaced with his locks surrounding his shoulders, contrasting with the variety of well pressed suits he uses now.

Polnareff, Passione’s consigliere, pointed out his physical similarities with Dio Brando some time ago, proceeding to talk in little details about him, and if he was trying not to break down and scream at him for the actions of that man, it was clear by the way his voice wavered that he was still feeling the losses, maybe not because he felt culprit, but for the things that could have been about their lives. Maybe, Iggy would be with them now, or maybe not; maybe, Avdol would be still working on his shop, or maybe not. Maybe, Kakyoin would have been working as a CEO, maybe not. Everything about it was based around suppositions. Suppositions Polnareff could only think of, swallowing sadness and regret.

The Speedwagon Foundation found Giorno a couple weeks ago when unfortunately, one of the traces of the drug dealers they have just took care of leaded to him. Soon, a letter from Jotaro Kujo arrived three days before the actual events, signed by a cordial extent to meet him, alongside the members of the Joestar family; a petition of Joseph Joestar. In a way, it felt like destroying the stone mask through Murolo was useless, he could have easily done it himself, and all this cordiality could have been avoided. Giorno signed the last page of what seemed to be a directory, but it was, in fact, a compilation of the reports regarding the incidents with drug dealers around Naples when the doors opened and a well-known face appeared carrying the folders with the reports about each one of the members of the Joestar family. Getting up from his desk to greet her, Giorno took the folders and lay them on the mahogany wood desk, turning around to greet her completely with a kiss on the lips and a smile. (Y/n) straightened the collar of his teal dressing shirt, that seemed like a compliment for his eyes, the fabric making his eyes seem like the loveliest pieces of jewelry in all Europe. “Thank you, bella.” He says, kissing her lips again before turning around to take one of the folders, opening it and leaning on the desk behind him. Each report has annexed photographs of the persons and relatives, as well as the events mentioned, allowing him to get a more expanded view and judgment. The Joestar family didn’t seem to be a big family, but the links and powers associated with it were big and impotent. It seems like being born in that family is a sentence to do something big. Starting with Joseph Joestar, the older man that started all of this. Age: 93. Fought against an ancient and superior race of Aztec warriors found in a Mexican temple around 1939, their existence was linked directly to the stone mask, and the searching of a mysterious jewel. Joseph was a hamon —the power of the canalization of the energy residing in breathing, — and a stand user. Occupation: real estate. His wife is Suzie Q, his biological sons are Holy Kujo and Josuke Higashikata —from a relationship with a Japanese woman, Tomoko Higashikata. — His adopted daughter is Shizuka Joestar. His parenthood towards Josuke Higashikata was recognized until 1999, when he traveled to Morioh with his grandson Jotaro Kujo. Humming to himself, Giorno closes the folder, taking the following, (Y/n) leaning on the desk, gazing at the folders casually. Jotaro Kujo, Age: 43. Stand user, killed Dio Brando in 1989. Giorno frowns at the line, of course he knew Dio Brando was dead, Polnareff have said it back at that time, explaining briefly that he was an evil man. His daughter is Jolyne Kujo and has an ex-wife. Marine biologist at charge of the Speedwagon Foundation. Josuke Joestar —Higashikata for his mother, Tomoko Higashikata. — Age: 30. Stand user, nurse at the Morioh hospital. Had a direct impact in the events in Morioh regarding a serial killer and the arrow. Jolyne Kujo, Age: 20. Stand user. Student. No further information.

A knock at the door makes echo in the office and the couple recognizes the three paused knocks as Mista’s message; they’re here. Looking down at his girlfriend, Giorno allows himself a moment of weakness by letting his eyes show how afraid he really is. The vulnerability is somethings he’s not accustomed to show, but that somehow always end up being one of the most comforting things he’s ever felt; maybe because he’s always looking though and untouchable that vulnerability allows him to relax a bit: more so, in her arms. Oh, her arms feel like home; if heaven could be represented as something the man knows, then that’ll be her arms: if paradise have to be summarized in feelings beyond the comprehension of words, Giorno could hold her, and feel in paradise. (Y/n) looks up at him, gazing through her lashes lovingly, and noticing his expression, her lips curl upwards in what he interprets as an inspiring smile. Suddenly, it feels like everything will be okay as long as she’s by his side, holding his hand through whatever fate has to offer. Her gesture coaxes the resolve he needed and straightening his back and gifting her with a smile of his own, the boss sits behind his desk, posture proud and confident. And as (Y/n) stands by his side and puts her hand on his shoulder, Giorno speaks in that tone that screams power and determination; pride and experience. “Come in.” The door cracks open and with a nod, the first person in step in the office, now in silence after (Y/n) paused the music, is Jolyne Kujo. Jolyne smiles politely as she makes her way to the couch, but doesn’t sit and instead stays on her feet, crossing her arms. The next person is Josuke Higashikata, who smiles politely too, muttering a “Good morning” while his attention is posed almost completely in guiding Joseph Joestar to the couch. The old man nods and smiles brightly, looking tired and taking a seat in the expensive couch. Last but not less important, the one who he knows will be harder to treat with, Jotaro Kujo. The man looks at him calm for a second and then, when he seems to take on his features, his eyebrows rise and he freezes in the umbral. Almost instantly, his brow lowers and his right hand rises to point a finger at him; jutting chin and voice hoarse, violent with anger. Jotaro Kujo shifted to suspicion to shock to anger in less than Giorno expected. “DIO.” He says, angrily and with fists clenched at his sides and clenched jaw. His stand glaring at him, ready to attack. “I thought I killed you in Egypt, you bastard.” With voice filled with a dangerous determination, Kujo stays there, expectant. The tension in the room is overwhelming, and despite Josuke’s thoughts to stop Jotaro from getting hurt and hurting others, he’s not sure if he’ll be able to reach and surpass Star Platinum’s speed. Jolyne seems ready to jump between them, knowing way too well what’s happening; but she’s not sure either: Star Platinum is a though enemy, and with Jotaro blinded by rage and something more, it’s sure that it will be harder than that.

Lord knows what may happen if he attacks, we don’t know Giorno’s powers.

It may seem like a communal thought, and if there was tension surrounding them, now fear adds something to the mix, terrifying like a sniper hiding between buildings, pointing at a target surrounded by civilians. And in fact, it is; and more so, when the only opportunity to stop him falls in the minimal possibility of a coincidence or an opportunity gifted by whatever or whoever who rules the world. With her hand still pressed against his left shoulder, (Y/n) can feel the sudden and almost unnoticeable tension on Giorno’s shoulders and back, raising from the depths of his being. Perhaps Jotaro´s last statement hit something on his heart, or maybe on his moral. It’s not a surprise, but something praiseworthy, when Giorno remains on his don acting; straight back, shoulders throw back, head high and lifted chin. His voice holds respect and perhaps a bit of his charming nature slips in between his words when he speaks, not intending to sound mocking. “I think, Mr. Kujo, that you’re confused. And surely, I don’t need to explain to you that Dio Brando, my father, is dead. As you may already know, I’m Giorno Giovanna.” Jotaro stares at him, jaw clenched and brow still furrowed. Expression hard and far from calm, fueled with rage and a determination Giorno recognizes as the determination a warrior carries within him —however, this is not a coliseum and there’s not pride or luck to prove; there’s no battle to fight. —

If Jotaro had something to do or say, it all was stopped by Joseph Joestar. “You look like him.” His words are almost unrecognizable and his voice in general sounds way too raspier, his age not helping him to articulate as a young person would, but still, even if it takes a bit more of effort, it’s still not impossible to understand him. All it takes is a bit more of attention. Giorno doesn’t stop looking at Jotaro, aware of the stand still present. The don doesn’t show his own stand, merely because doing so would mean a fight. And he’s sure that fighting for the sins of a dead man wouldn’t bring him out of the bottle he’s in; of a bastard. Maybe he’s viewed by them as the same trash Dio Brando was. Perhaps they all are ready to kill him; maybe not. Whatever they want, Giorno knows it’s not about this. And if it is, then he’s ready to fight. “You look like my grandfather, just like grandma Erina described him.” Jotaro swallows hard and presses his lips in a tight line, his brow is still furrowed; silent, he steps back and struts away, Mista keeping a close eye to him until he leaves in the same way they came. “I’m sorry for that,” says Josuke, “he’s… deeply affected by that battle.” Giorno nods, looking at Mista and once the gunslinger catches his sight, Giorno looks at Polnareff. Mista nods and taking Polnareff he looks at (Y/n), silently according to take care of Giorno while he’s away. (Y/n) nods and Mista closes the door behind his back. Looking at Josuke, Giorno nods. “I understand.” Joseph Joestar looks at him with half lidded eyes and a polite but more sincere smile, and Giorno takes the opportunity to talk. “Please, take a seat. May I ask what business do you have with me?” Jolyne sits beside Josuke, who’s at Joseph’s right side. “It’s not business, actually. It’s a family matter.” Jolyne states, looking expectantly at her great-grandfather. Joseph takes his time to catch his breath before speaking. “The Joestar family can defeat anything as long as it stays together.” When Giorno arches an eyebrow questioningly, Josuke smiles brightly, trying not to laugh. Still, his cheerful nature acts. “Yeah, Giorno, you’re a Joestar.” When Giorno tries to pull up an argument regarding Dio Brando being an adopted son of Jorge Joestar, Joseph raises his metallic hand; and when he does it, it makes a clicking sound that startles (Y/n) a bit, her hand locked with Giorno’s now as she sits beside him, in another office chair. “Let me tell you about the family, Giorno. And you’ll understand.” Giorno nods and Joseph starts talking, mentioning Jorge Joestar and Mary Joestar; Jonathan Joestar and Erina Pendleton, Dio Brando and the stone mask, Robert Speedwagon, William Zeppeli; then it’s about him, Suzie Q, Caesar Zeppeli, Jorge Joestar II and Elizabeth Joestar and the pillar men; Jotaro Kujo, himself, Jean Pierre Polnareff, Mohammed Avdol, Noriaki Kakyoin, Iggy, DIO and the atrocities he committed, the families he broke and the innumerable lives he ended on his way; Josuke, Okuyasu Nijimura, Reimi, Arnold, Koichi Hirose, Rohan Kishibe, Hayato, Tomoko Higashikata, Kira Yoshikage; Jolyne, her mother and Jotaro. By the end of the story and since Dio Brando and his actions were explained, Giorno holds (Y/n)’s hand in a tight embrace, as if he’s trying to calm himself with her presence. When Jolyne excuses herself and goes out to look at her dad, Josuke turns to him, and as if he’s reading his mind, Crazy Diamond’ user speaks, “It’s not your fault, you know, I mean, everything Dio did.” “It isn’t my fault, but I know he did damage to all of you. Starting off with Jonathan Joestar, who could have lived a good and long life. It’s not my fault, but it makes me think and have a different vision of him.”

Joseph smiles, then, and with a certain wisely expression, comments. “I know how you feel, and no; it’s not your fault. None of it. In fact, I thought you were going to scream at Jotaro for what he did.”

Giorno’s shrugs, starting to feel more in some kind of confidence with them. “Justice may come for all; one way or another.”

Josuke smiles, deciding to lighten up the aura in the room, aware of Giorno’s thoughtful expression. “I like him.”

Joseph laughs, “Someone says something accurate about justice and you like them just for that?”

As father and son laugh, (Y/n) looks at him, and while doing so, he does look at her. Grasping his hand, (Y/n) tries to make him feel better. Even if she knows that he’ll talk about it later, when the privacy of their room brings peace to the don.

•••

When Giorno gazes at the photograph of Jonathan Joestar and Erina Pendleton, his heart sinks on his chest. (Y/n) sits by his side, her hand around his arm. Looking at her, Giorno’s lips open, but he’s not able to talk. (Y/n) leans backwards, bringing him with her and when he’s finally settled on top of her, hands locked and bodies fused in relaxation, he starts unraveling.

“Remember when I told you about the expectations I used to have about him?”

(Y/n) hums in approval, running her hand down his back, noting how his strong muscles shift under her touch.

“With the truth… All of them are shattered.”

His statement feels like a call for help, a desperate need to choose if the truth is better than a fantasy. Then again, the only thing that survives is the truth, righteous actions and the consequences will always come out; whether he was aware of this, the expectations weren’t created during his teenage years, but during those nights when crying was useless back at when he was six.

And now, in his adult life, Giorno feels like a child again. Discovering that he can feel something more aside from fake calm; discovering that he can be loved and love; discovering that he’s human after all,

and nothing will ever take his humanity from him

. Only fate could decide about him, but it was so damn desperate sometimes, to think that despite being powerful aside from his social position, not even his stand could ever rewrite his past or his future.

“I understand what are you trying to say, and I think, in all seriousness, that you know who you are. Your progenitors don’t define who will you be. You may have their genes, but the person you decide to be, it’s up to you.”

“I don’t want to be like him, (Y/n).”

“I know, Gio. And you will not be; who you are is up to you.”

♦♦♦

Gazing around the coliseum, he looks down and the first thing he notices is the pink suit. Then, the blood on his hands, the strong smell of the iron surrounding his face and the wet sensation on his mouth and lips; and then, gazing down when something soft shifts underneath him the terror of the pile of bodies under him is almost exorbitant. The first faces he recognizes are Narancia’s and Fugo’s. Then, Abbacchio’s and Bruno’s clothes, Trish skirt stained with blood; and then, Risotto Nero and his men; all of them dead, their bodies seeming rather absorbed off blood. Feeling his heart beating furiously, Giorno looks at his hands once again, but his hands are no longer there; what was supposed to be his hands are now a pair of mirrors; and when both mirrors are in front of his face, Giorno finally gets to see were the smell of iron comes from: his lips and mouth are full of blood; and it’s not hard to connect the points and realize that they all are dead because of him. Of the monster he really is.—

With shaking breaths and cold sweat, Giorno’s eyes open just to find (Y/n)’s worried orbs looking at him from above as she stands at his side, barefoot, her hands on his shoulders and when it finally clicks, Giorno’s breathing quickens again and as (Y/n) sits beside him, the tears don’t stop.

•••

It’s been two weeks since his hopes were reduced to ashes and the most horrible sensation of fear woke up when Giorno sits on his desk resting his eyes after the piles of paperwork he worked through the day. His teal eyes are fixed intensely on the sunset, noticing each orange and pink tone lacing the sky when a sudden pang of sharpen pain on his head makes him close his eyes and lean his head on his hand.

“Giogio, are you okay?”

(Y/n)’s voice brings him out of the exorbitant pain and seems to ease it almost instantly. “Yeah, I’m just tired… And thirsty.”

She smiles sweetly and entering the office, the sudden warm of her hand makes him realize how cold he really felt. (Y/n) frowns, and as she leads him out of his office, asks “Are you sure you aren’t sick? You’re cold.”

“Must be the lack of physical movement, cara.”

She hums, “Right then, We’ll walk to the restaurant, Mister Giovanna.”

Giorno smiles and as they pass besides the painting of the goddess of love, supposed to be the guardian of the Joestar’s in Joseph’s words, Giorno almost prays to her for not being like him,

even if the pain of his head felt like the welcoming ritual for a life beyond human understanding.

#Teal and Burgundy #vampire!giorno #vampire! giorno giovanna #giorno giovanna x reader #fem reader #fem s/o #sfw #JoJo's Bizarre Adventure #Jojo no Kimyou na Bouken #JJBA Vento Aureo #guido mista #panacotta fugo #Bruno Buccellati #naranica ghirga #Leone Abacchio #Risotto Nero #La Squadra di Esecuzione

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that-shamrock-vibe · 4 years

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Disney+ What To Watch: My Top 10 Favourite Modern-Day Disney Classics

#1. The Emperor’s New Groove

I absolutely and completely fell in love with this movie the first time I saw it. Not only is the movie’s comedy on point but the animation styling, the story and the emotion that develops throughout this movie, for me, is exceptional.

Now it is fair to say that my #1 and #2 favourites involve the main protagonists being indirectly turned into into animals by the movie’s main villains and the story that follows is a buddy movie about self-discovery. But while The Princess and the Frog is a developing love story, The Emperor’s New Groove is a cautionary tale about the pitfalls about power, how it can corrupt and to appreciate the little and simple things about life.

In a way, The Princess and the Frog and Lilo & Stitch are also about that as the former sees the the main protagonists learn to open themselves up emotionally and the latter is about the meaning of family but this movie combines with it a fun family adventure, some rather high-intense sequences, brilliant comedic scenes, one or two fantastic meta-reference moments and every main and supporting character fills their roles perfectly.

Not only are the characters fantastic, but this movie makes me enjoy both David Spade and Patrick Warburton, I don’t really dislike Warburton but I really dislike David Spade unless his voice is coming out of an animated llama.

The plot, despite being slightly derivative of a standard buddy adventure comedy, somehow makes itself quite unique in the sense of not only the prince cursed to be a llama learning to be human but also the very hands on interference from the villains.

Speaking of the villains, despite being a movie about Emperor Kuzco learning a sense of humanity while he is effectively exiled from his throne, this movie’s two main best features are Yzma and her minion Kronk.

There are very few actors that I say are born for roles and certainly fewer that I say are born for multiple roles, but Eartha Kitt was born to be Yzma just as she was born to be Catwoman. It’s no surprise that these are her two most recognisable roles.in mainstream fandom.

I cannot say enough great things about this character, she is, for me, the best Disney Villain since Cruella De Vil because she is unapologetically ambitious, knows what she wants and will stop at nothing to to achieve it.

Her design is cartoon enough to not seem real but at the same time you want to meet this woman in real life, if that makes sense. She is such an interesting character that you want to meet her, you want to interview her, you want to find out about her history and what got her to this point in her life.

But she is also hilarious and fearsome at the same time. She is a fully-realised three-dimensional character and not just this movie’s typical baddie. This is captured not only in the character design but particularly in Eartha Kitt’s performance. I love her almost as much as I love Cruella and her becoming a cat at the end was the icing on the cake of a fabulous performance for me.

Kronk meanwhile is what I deem to be a villain by circumstance, to the point where I actually believe he is slightly oblivious to exactly what side he has found himself on working for Yzma. This is because, maybe save for Pacha, he is the gentlest and most naive character in the village. That’s not necessarily a bad thing and it is a great moment when he finds his place in the world separate to Yzma and isn’t persecuted for his past because officially he hasn’t actually done anything villainous save for attempted regicide.

However, the great thing about this movie, and Kuzco being something of an anti-hero, is I don’t believe anyone in the kingdom would prosecute

As for Kuzco, he definitely showed some growth throughout this movie. He may not be the nicest individual but he does learn a lesson in humility and also friendship through his friendship with Pacha and the karma he receives through his actions reverberating on the giant target Yzma paints on his back.

This movie is also very quotable, this may not be the most well-known movie but chances are you will recognise a quote or two that were coined in the playgrounds if you attended school in the early 2000s. From Kuzco’s catchphrases such as “No touchy”, “Llama Face” and his “a-ha” victory chant, it’s fair to say that non-fans are at least familiar with one of them.

But also, let’s be honest, the best moment of this movie is Yzma’s iconic “Pull the lever Kront, wrong lever!”. Not only was this instant comedy gold but continued to be a staple in the franchise as the spin-off series The Emperor’s New School utilised many versions of this scene throughout the series.

Kuzco is also a fourth wall joke away from be the Disney Animated version of Deadpool, not only does he break the fourth wall numerous times in the first half of the movie, but also you can tell that if the movie was higher than a family friendly rating, he would not be so family friendly which is fantastic with the potential being there but not needing to be exposed.

Also, the movie is set in Peru. I think Up and The Three Caballeros are the only other movies in Disney history to actually feature any South American locales and not just the design in architecture but the fact that Pacha’s village is authentic to South American culture being a llama herding and produce village is very productive for an animated movie. It creates teachable moments without jamming it down your throats.

That being said, it would have been nice to have some Peruvian or South American representation in the voice casting, because despite the talents of Eartha Kitt and Wendie Malick, the rest is principally a white in a strictly Peruvian setting.

Musically there are just three words...Tom freakin Jones. Not only is his music the theme song for this movie but he is the only “theme song guy” to become animated as the theme song guy. He is in this movie less than Bucky the Squirrel yet I love him just as much.

Also there is a fantastic song that was left on the cutting room floor sang by Eartha Kitt “Snuff Out the Light”. Not only do I feel that if this song were included it may have made it a slightly different movie but also I would say that non-canonically it is one of the better Disney Villain songs if nothing else but for Eartha’s powerhouse performance.

This movie, like One Hundred and One Dalmatians is a movie where I can honestly say that, for me, there is not a bad moment in this movie, there are no slow parts, there aren’t any unnecessary parts, the slightly wacky or convoluted moments add to the genius that this movie encapsulates.

I can remember seeing this movie with my mum and sister and loving it, I remember playing the PlayStation game and loving it, Outside of Disney compilation soundtracks, this was also the movie soundtrack I ever owned and it is because of Tom Jones and Eartha Kitt’s performances...there’s just nothing bad I can say about this movie.

So what do you guys think? Post your comments and check out more Disney+ What to Watch Top 10s as well as more Top 10 Lists and other posts.

#disney+#disney plus #disney+ what to watch top 10s #disney+ what to watch #my top 10 favourite modern day disney animated movies #my top 10 favourite modern day disney classics #the emperor's new groove #eartha kitt #yzma and kronk #yzma #david spade #john goodman #patrick warburton #walt disney animation studios

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mischiefandspirits · 4 years

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Who is Iron Man?

Part 2 (Here is Part 1)

After a three month imprisonment by terrorists, child genius Tony Stark was rescued by an unknown entity. Who is this Iron Man? The world wants to know.

From One Court to Another

By Callum Killough - April 28, 2012

After six months, the adoption case for child genius and millionaire Tony Stark has finally finalized with United States Air Force Colonel James Rhodes and newly appointed Stark Industries Chief Executive Officer Virginia Potts gaining joint custody. When questioned at the press conference following the hearing, all three were pleased, though Stark once more bemoaned his failed emancipation.

For those unaware, five months ago Stark put in a request to become an emancipated minor despite being only ten. He used both his incredible intelligence and his work with Stark Industries as evidence that he was capable of functioning as an adult and should be excluded from the usual minimum age requirements. However, after long deliberation, the courts had decided not to grant him the exclusion, and therefore his emancipation.

In answer to a question about housing, Rhodes stated that Stark is currently staying with Potts until construction of Stark Tower completes in July, at which point all three will be moving into the penthouse there so that Potts and Stark can be on hand to set up the new headquarters and Rhodes can be near his latest assignment.

When one reporter questioned what “compensation” the courts had granted Potts and Rhodes “for their troubles,” Stark cut over Potts to remind everyone that she and Rhodes had turned down any subsidy or similar months earlier as their combined incomes were more than enough to care for the three’s needs and any of his more expensive endeavors (both personal and Stark Industries related) were financed by his monitored trust fund and private accounts. He then proceeded to refer to the reporter as something that can not be repeated to the admonishments of both Potts and Rhodes.

The conference ended shortly after and Potts was spotted lecturing Stark as they were escorted to their car, which Stark merely shrugged off with, “If they’re going to keep calling you and Rhodey gold-diggers, then they deserve it.”

Potts responded with, “Not on camera they don’t. Does Jocasta need to help you review the approved word list again?”

While Stark’s answer was unheard, he reportedly had a look of terror on his face as the door to the car was closed.

Though not confirmed, the Jocasta mentioned is believed to be one of the interns on the newly instated Stark Industries social media team who is credited with many of the photographs and videos on their Twitter and Instagram, including a video of the press conference which can be found here.

It seems that Stark is going from one court to another though as an inside source has let it be known that Potts and Stark arrived at the airport afterward to board their flight to New York to attend tomorrow’s opening ceremonies for the Stark Exo, only for Stark to be served with a subpoena stating he is to appear at a hearing for the Senate Armed Services Committee regarding Iron Man in D.C. the morning after the ceremonies.

It hasn’t been confirmed as of yet, but it can be assumed that Iron Man will likely be receiving one as well via his military liaison United States Air Force Major Monica Rambeau.

While the full purpose of the hearing hasn’t been revealed, it is speculated that the committee intends to force Iron Man to turn his suit over to the government. An anonymous source on the committee had this to say:

“While I can’t say for certain that is what the hearing is about, I will say that such an idea would be a hard sell indeed. While most on the committee think the suit should be in the hands of the military instead of a civilian, [Pennsylvania State Senator Gary] Stern in particular, they’d face a lot of backlash for pushing the topic. And I don’t just mean from Iron Man’s civilian fans.

“Many active servicemen and women — as well as their families and some veterans — have gotten behind the inventor thanks to some of the joint missions he has been a part of. Especially those in the know about rescue missions that never would have gotten off the ground without Iron Man’s assistance due to the danger involved for the rescue team. While I’m sure none of them would say no to a suit of their own, Rhodes, Rambeau, and [United States Air Force Brigadier General Glenn] Talbot won’t be the only ones up in arms if Iron Man retracts his help for fear that someone’s going to take his private property.

“Of course, that’s assuming the committee is even brave enough to go up against the cutthroat team Potts and Stark have proven themselves to be these past months in the first place.”

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An Excerpt From the Transcription of the Senate Armed Services Committee Hearing on Iron Man (April 30, 2012)

Senator Stern: Do you or do you not possess a specialized weapon?

Iron Man: I do not.

Stern: You do not?

Tony Stark: He doesn’t. Well, it depends on how you define the word weapon.

Stern: The Iron Man weapon.

IM: My device does not fit that description.

Stern: Well… How would you describe it?

IM: I would describe it by defining it as what it is, Senator.

Stern: As?

Stark: It’s a high-tech prosthesis. That is… That is… That’s actually the most apt description I can make of it.

Stern: It’s a weapon. It’s a weapon, Mr. Stark. I hate to inform you, it’s a weapon.

Stark: Please, if your priority was actually the well-being of the American citizen…

Stern: My priority is to get the Iron Man weapon turned over to the people of the United States of America.

Stark: Well, you can forget it.

IM: Sir, with all due respect, I am Iron Man. The suit and I are one. To turn over the Iron Man suit would be to turn over myself.

Stark: Which is tantamount to indentured servitude or prostitution, depending or what state you’re in. You can’t have it.

Stern: Look, I’m no expert…

Stark: In prostitution? Of course not. You’re a senator. Come on.

Virginia Potts: Tony, enough.

Stern: I’m no expert in weapons. We have somebody here who is an expert on weapons. I’d now like to call Justin Hammer, our current primary weapons contractor.

Stark: Let the record reflect that I observed Mr. Hammer entering the chamber, and I am wondering if and when any actual expert will also be in attendance.

Potts: Tony.

Justin Hammer: Absolutely. I’m no expert. I defer to you, Anthony. You’re the wonder boy. Senator, if I may. I may well not be an expert, but you know who was the expert? Your grandpa. Howard Stark. Really a father to us all, and to the military-industrial age. Let’s just be clear, he was no flower child. He was a lion. We all know why we’re here. In the last six months, this… Iron Man -- this unknown person -- has created a sword with untold possibilities. And yet, he insists it’s a shield. He asks us to trust him as we cower behind it, without even letting us know his face or name. With only the reassurances of a few handpicked people, including a ten-year-old child.

Stark: I’m the smartest person in this room and we all know it.

Hammer: I wish I were comforted, Anthony, I really do. I’d love to leave my door unlocked when I leave the house, but this ain’t Canada. You know, we live in a world of grave threats, threats that Iron Man will not always be able to foresee. Thank you. God bless Iron Man. God bless America.

Stern: That is well said, Mr. Hammer. The committee would now like to invite Major Monica Rambeau to the chamber.

Stark: Spectrum? What?

[Major Rambeau enters the court]

Potts: Tony, stay here.

Stark: Hey, Ramsey. I didn’t expect to see you here.

Rambeau: Sit down, kid.

IM: Major.

Rambeau: Deckard.

Stern: I have before me a complete report on the Iron Man weapon, compiled by Major Rambeau, Colonel Rhodes, and Brigadier General Talbot. And, Major, for the record, can you please read page 57, paragraph four?

Rambeau: You’re asking me to read a portion of a highly detailed report, Senator?

Stern: Yes, ma’am.

Rambeau: I was told I’d be giving a full testimony.

Stern: I understand. A lot of things have changed today. So if you could just read…

Rambeau: Just to be clear, you do realize that one portion of a report -- out of context and without the full summary of the findings -- does n-

Stern: Just read it, Major. I do. Thank you.

Rambeau: Alright. “As he does not operate within any definable branch of government, Iron Man presents a potential threat to the security of both the nation and to her interests.” Colonel Rhodes did, however, go on to say that the benefits of Iron Man far outweigh the liabilities and that it would be in our interest to fold him into the existing chain of command, Senator.

Stern: That’s enough. That’s enough, Major. That’s enough.

IM: I appreciate the offer, but I am not sure I meet the requirements of armed service without the suit.

Stark: I’m sure he’d consider Secretary of Defence if you ask nicely.

IM: I would not.

Stark: We can amend the hours a little bit, buddy.

Stern: I’d like to go on and show, if I may, the imagery that’s connected to your report.

Rambeau: I think it may be too soon to allow these images to reach the general public, sir.

Stern: With all due respect, Major, I understand. And if you could just narrate those for us, we’d be very grateful.

Rambeau: Bring up the images.

[Images located within file srcw35475]

Rambeau: Intelligence suggests that the devices seen in these photos are, in fact, attempts at making manned copies of Iron Man’s suit. This has been corroborated by our allies and local intelligence on the ground indicating that these suits are quite possibly, at this moment, operational.

Stark: Hold on a second, Ramsey. Let me see something here.

[Uncataloged videos appeared onscreen.]

Stark: Oh boy, I’m good. I commandeered your screens. I need them. Time for a little transparency. Now, let’s see what’s really going on.

Stern: What is he doing?

Tony: If you will direct your attention to said screens, I believe that’s North Korea.

[Uncataloged video 1: A large mechanical suit takes two steps then falls over, firing upon a crowd of onlookers as they scream and flee.]

Stern: Can you turn that off? Take it off.

Stark: Iran.

[Uncataloged video 2: A large flying suit spirals out of control.]

Stark: No grave immediate threat here. Is that Justin Hammer? How did Hammer get in the game? Justin, you’re on TV. Focus up.

[Uncataloged video 3: Justin Hammer is seen communicating with someone in a human-sized suit just before the suit twists nearly one hundred and eighty degrees at the waist. Its pilot immediately screams then falls silent.]

Stark: Wow. Yeah, I’d say most countries, five, ten years away. Hammer Industries, twenty.

Hammer: I’d like to point out that that test pilot survived.

Stern: I think we’re done is the point that he’s making. I don’t think there’s any reason…

Stark: The point is, you’re welcome, I guess. No need to thank IM, really.

Stern: For what?

Stark: Because he’s your nuclear deterrent. It’s working. We’re safe. America is secure. You want his property? You can’t have it. But he did you a big favor. He’s successfully privatized world peace. What more do you want? For now! I tried to play ball with these [redacted]!

Potts: Tony, enough!

Operation Robin: Second Report

Acting Agent: [redacted]

Date: [redacted]

Contact with the target has been made, but a problem has arisen as it would appear he has already found a new personal assistant.

I arrived at the target’s off-site lab on an errand to fill out paperwork and was greeted by a man (Japanese, late twenties, unseen) over an intercom. He checked my identity then allowed me in. When I walked in, the target was playing a game on a holographic screen while speaking to a woman (Irish, early thirties, unseen) over speakerphone as a pair of robots (little more than arms on wheels) cleaned. When I informed him of what I was there for he closed his game and spun the desk chair around to face me with a curious expression. When I attempted to hand him the paperwork, he frowned and moved away from the files.

That was when one of the robots rushed over in a flurry of beeps. It took the paperwork from my hand and dropped it into the target’s lap before rolling off back to the counter it had been wiping down.

“[Redacted] does not like to be handed things,” the man’s voice from the door responded.

I reminded the target that the information we needed to discuss was confidential and as such no one should listen in, but he waved it off saying there was no one listening that couldn’t hear. When I reminded him he was still on a call and that the man who had allowed me in was obviously listening, he said the woman -- he called her [redacted] -- was his new personal assistant and minder and the man -- he called him [redacted] -- was in charge of security for the lab and was required by [redacted] to keep an eye on the target whenever he was there for safety reasons, as such both were cleared for any information that he was privy to.

Due to the target’s dislike of paperwork, we finished quickly after that. In a successful attempt to stay longer to observe the target, I goaded his infamous ego by complimenting the robots and asking how they worked. Although he didn’t go into any details about how they actually functioned, he explained that they were designed to assist him. He had clear pride for his work in his eyes as he spoke of them, though he often spoke of how they messed up, especially one in particular which he repeatedly referred to as an idiot with humor in his eyes like he was telling me an inside joke. When I asked why he did not just reprogram them as “surely someone with your intelligence could make them better,” he immediately closed up and dismissed me soon after. As I left, I heard him tell them that they were “perfect just as you are, don’t listen to the mean lady.”

Initial assessment of target: Despite his intellect, he is far too immature at this point, with the propensity to boredom and anger that that pertains. He is a narcissist, takes to any criticism with denial and treats his creations as extensions of himself to be coddled and praised.

I have attempted to find more information on [redacted] and [redacted], but their employee files are encrypted. I confirmed that the bug [redacted] placed on the target’s servers was lost during his move so I could not access the files using that backdoor. As those are the only names the target proved and I can not be sure if they are even real names given the target’s fondness for pseudonyms, I am unable to investigate further at this time. I believe it is likely that the [redacted] the subject is connected to on Twitter is likely this woman, though I cannot confirm.

I will continue to investigate as much as possible without blowing my cover and await further orders.

Disaster at the Grand Prix

By Gisèle Favager - Translated by Valentin Paquet - 24 May 2012

The start of the Grand Prix De Monaco was delayed today when an unknown Russian man attacked American engineering prodigy Tony Stark.

Stark had come to Monte Carlo for the race with his adoptive mother Virginia Potts, but snuck away from her and their bodyguard after making a quick appearance at the VIP clubhouse to talk shop with the Stark Industries pit team.

He was reportedly in a playful debate with the team’s leader when the assailant, disguised as a Grand Prix mechanic, attacked the boy. He grabbed him and threw him into the road before using a weapon described as a pair of electrified whips connected to a chest harness power source.

Stark scrambled away from his assailant, barely managing to dodge the whips as he gave a sharp whistle. According to witnesses, the whistle caused the backpack he had brought down to the pit to unfold into a mechanical hound, which quickly scanned the area before running at the assailant. It leaped onto his back and bit into his shoulder. The man tried to remove it for only a moment before he collapsed to the ground in a jerking fit.

“Stun gun fangs,” Potts explained during a short public statement after the man had been taken away by the authorities. She continued on to say that the Digitally Operated Guarding and Guiding Individualized Entity -- or D.O.G.G.I.E. as Stark insisted -- is a prototype assistance drone modeled after service dogs that Stark Industries is currently working on.

“It is not currently available for production due to the current operating system being too specifically designed, though Stark Industries is collaborating with doctors specializing in neurology, cardiology, and psychology to ensure [the Digitally Operated Guarding and Guiding Individualized Entity] will be able to calibrate properly to its user. Further information will be disclosed once a release date has been set.”

Shortly after the incident, an American senator by the name of Stern appeared on television to make a public statement. However, what was assumed to be sympathies and concern over the wellbeing of his young countryman turned out to be an excuse to besmirch Iron Man. Stern attempted to discredit the inventor’s main defense that had been given at the hearing last month stating no one else had technology like the Iron Man armor and wouldn’t for at least five to ten years, as stated by Stark himself, by using the assailant’s weapon as proof that the technology did exist elsewhere.

Stark quickly took to Twitter with a retort.

“Hey intern that runs the @SenSternOfficial twitter, did your boss really just compare a suit of armor that can shrug off shots from a tank to a pair of whips that got their butt kicked by my dog?”

Who this man is and why he attacked Stark is as of yet unknown.

Amalia Riviera - (818) 375-8465 ext 8736 - [email protected]

May 30th, 2012

Natalie Rushman Notary Stark Industries Los Angeles Headquarters

Dear Ms. Rushman,

I regret to inform you that your employment at Stark Industries has been terminated, effective immediately.

This has come to pass for the following reasons:

Breach of contract

Corporate espionage

Misrepresentation of self in application

This decision is not reversible.

In accordance with your contract, all employee benefits have been revoked as of the sending of this letter. Your final paycheck will be withheld until the full investigation is completed and it is determined no further actions are necessary. Should it be determined that the matter must be taken to court, your final paycheck may be held indefinitely pending the court’s decision.

You have one hour from the time you receive this letter to vacate the premises. Should you remain, security will escort you out and trespassing charges will be issued. Any personal items remaining on the premises at the time of your departure will be gathered and delivered to your residence on file within seven to ten business days at the company’s expense.

It is requested that you turn over any company property you possess to human resources before you leave. This includes your company-issued laptop, cellphone, and badge. You will be fined for any company property not returned within forty-eight hours of receiving this message.

Please keep in mind the non-disclosure and non-solicitation agreements you have signed. Should you have any questions regarding the agreements, your termination, or the investigation, please contact the Former Employees sector of Human Resources at (818) 375-8465 ext. 5731.

Sincerely,

Amalia Riviera Human Resources Stark Industries Los Angeles Headquarters

Addendum:

Agent Romanoff,

Please inform your director that if he wishes to communicate with me, he need only utilize the number provided to him. This is your final warning. Any other incursions into the young sir’s privacy will be met with the harshest legal actions available.

Thank you for your time,

Iron Man

Iron Man 2.0

By CamicsComics - May 29, 2012

Hey there CamComs! I was woken up far too early this morning by my friend texting me and I’m not even mad.

Why?

Because she texted me a link to a tweet Tony Stark made at three A.M. this morning.

“@1r0n_M4n is doing some spring cleaning and giving away some old clothes. Think this will fit @ColRhodey?”

The tweet came alongside a pic of a silver Iron Man gauntlet engraved with Mark II.

Col Rhodes replied with “You’ve got no one to blame but yourself if Talbot sees this before his announcement and he bans you from any more meetings.” While Potts only said, “You’re grounded.”

Does this mean what I think it does? Could we soon have another Iron Man flying around?

So many have tweeted at IM asking for more info that #MarkII is trending, but he’s been silent all day except for a picture of Stark getting chewed out by Potts with the caption, “Happy Birthday, @TStark!!! 🎂”

I can’t wait to see what happens. And hopefully BGen Talbot doesn’t hear about this so Stark can keep giving us this quality content.

Happy B-Day you crazy eleven-year-old!!!!

Subscribe, like, and share, CamComs! Until next time, be the hero you want to see in the world!

From: [email protected]

To: [email protected]

Subject: Re: Proposal for new element name - Anthony Stark

Dear Mr. Stark,

On behalf of the International Union of Pure and Applied Chemistry, I would like to congratulate you on your accomplishment. However, I regret to inform you that your proposal to name your new element “Badassium” has been denied.

This decision was based on the vulgar nature of the proposed name.

We would be pleased to review a second, more appropriate, choice of name at your earliest convenience.

Best wishes,

Teresa Cordon International Union of Pure and Applied Chemistry Representative

Stark Under Surveillance

By Sabrina Blake - June 10, 2012

It’s well known that superhero Iron Man and kid genius Tony Stark have been connected since the very beginning, but so far there’s only been talk about the good things that come from it. Not anymore though as yesterday just might have given us a peek at the dark underbelly of this beast.

At around five in the afternoon, Stark broke the two-week-long media silence he’s been under since the attack on the Stark Expo to tweet, “TFW you finally duck out of the lecture on trying to slip inappropriate language into new element names, only for the director of New Age HYDRA to burst in complaining about how his spy got fired from your company for being a spy #FirstWorldProblems”. The tweet had been taken down in under ten minutes, but plenty had seen it by then. Screenshots and questions have flooded the internet, to no answer from Stark, Iron Man, or their people.

Someone’s giving us information, though, as an unknown person sent various news organizations a digital folder of information labeled The Aegis Files. The folder included a picture of a dark-skinned man with an eyepatch being escorted out of a building by Stark Industries security and a furious Col Rhodes alongside a slightly redacted report on the incident. All the personal information had been removed, though it did show that whoever the man was, he was taken in by the police before being turned over to a redacted organization. It’s assumed this man is likely the HYDRA director Stark mentioned giving the timing. Also included in the folder was a Stark Industries employee file. It was similarly redacted, though the woman’s photo was still there, revealing her to be a caucasian woman with auburn hair. She’s believed to be the spy as the file states she was fired due to corporate espionage.

Who are these people? These Aegis Agents, so to speak? What do they want with Stark? Where else have they infiltrated? How accurate is the comparison to the old Nazi intelligence organization? How is Iron Man connected?

Hopefully, we’ll hear more soon.

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#iron man 2 #j.a.r.v.i.s.#tony stark #rhodey #pepper potts

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white-rose-week · 5 years

Text

White Rose Week 2019: That Day on the Airship - Epilogue

Free Day

Self-Given Prompt: Callbacks to Prior Prompts

(Also available on FF and AO3)

Ruby's head popped off of her pillow.

She jumped out of the large, half-empty bed and began preparing for the day with an even wider smile than usual. As she put on her newest combat skirt, she looked at the now entirely empty bed fondly, giggling mirthfully at how tidy Weiss' side was compared to her own. After checking her pockets to ensure she had her scroll and everything else she needed for the day, she exited the room, closing the door behind herself.

Weiss was already downstairs eating breakfast and sending emails.

"I informed the board of directors weeks ago that I would be out today! I even sent them reminders yesterday. Can't they survive twenty four hours without me?!" Weiss mumbled with frustration as she sent off yet another memo to people she would be having stern conversations with tomorrow. Her hostile buyout of the Schnee Dust Company a few months after the defeat of Salem had proven quite simple after a scathing exposé came out detailing numerous labor and ethics violations that the company had committed in the past several years, along with thorough documentation of her father's knowledge and active approval of the violations. An exposé that Weiss most certainly not responsible for compiling and leaking, or at least, that's what she told media outlets that inquired about it. Regardless of who the (obviously noble, talented, and beautiful) person behind it was, it obliterated her father's reputation and sent the company into disarray. From there, leveraging the personal assets she had along with the notoriety from her involvement in the war against Salem, convincing the board of directors to accept her buyout was child's play.

Weiss smirked to herself. Even though running the company was a significant time commitment and she still had some problematic individuals to weed out, it was worth it. The only thing that she held as a higher priority in her life was—

"Good morning!" A singsong voice called out, and Ruby skipped into the kitchen, shattering any SDC-related thoughts from Weiss' mind.

"Good morning, Ruby." Weiss responded, her prior tension melting away as she closed her laptop and stood so she could give Ruby a gentle hug and kiss on the lips. "I'll prepare your coffee." She said, taking her seat again and reaching for the pitcher in the middle of the table.

"Only after I'm done refilling yours!" Ruby said defiantly as she quickly sat down and snatched the pitcher before Weiss could get to it. She gave Weiss a toothy grin as she topped off the white mug on the other side of the table. She was never content with letting Weiss dote on her unless she was able to able to return the favor.

"Very well." Weiss said playfully as she took the pitcher and proceeded to fill the empty red mug across from her, adding in cream and five sugars before nudging it with one finger toward Ruby.

"Thanks Weiss! It always tastes better when you pour it." Ruby said with a grin as she picked up her mug and held it outward. "Cheers! To our girlfriend-iversary!"

"Cheers. To us." Weiss clinked her mug against Ruby's and they both took their first sips, enjoying a quiet moment to stare at each other.

"So, you're sure Nora can run your shop for the day without accidentally setting off one of the hundreds of weapons on display?" She asked, only half joking as she broke the silence.

"Oh come on, she's not THAT much of a loose cannon anymore." Ruby waved Weiss off casually. "Plus, Ren is there with her. I'm sure they'll be fine."

"If you say so. I just don't want our day together to be interrupted by Ren calling you with the news that your shop has a giant hole in the wall."

"Relax, Weiss. We have too much planned today for you to waste time worrying about that type of thing anyways. And if you want to check the place for damage yourself, we can switch places tomorrow. You'll run the shop for the day, and I'll run the SDC and all your fancy-schmancy meetings!"

"As amusing as it is to imagine the department managers trying to keep up with your energy, I think we both remember the last time you tried to act like me, and I think they're a bit too stuffy to appreciate your brand of leadership."

"I think that means you need new department managers!"

"To be honest, I've been thinking the same thing. I'll probably be looking for at least a few new ones starting tomorrow. Would you be interested in running a leadership workshop for all the department managers once I've finished the hiring a few new ones?"

"I'd be happy to, but my fee is ten kisses per hour and must be paid out directly by the CEO."

"Your terms are steep, but acceptable. My people will call your people. Now if you'll excuse me, I have a very important appointment downtown." Weiss gave Ruby a playful wink as she stood and walked toward the kitchen. She placed her empty mug in the sink and gave her combat skirt's pocket a quick pat with her free hand, checking that she had her wallet and other essentials.

"I must be going as well." Ruby called out. "I've got a date with a pretty girl!" She chugged the last of her sweet drink before running over to Weiss. "Hi there, pretty girl!" She said cutely.

The couple giggled at each other as they exited their penthouse apartment and walked into a well-decorated hallway. A short elevator ride later, they were on the sidewalk of Vale's main street. The city had been rebuilt following the defeat of Salem at the hands of Team RWBY and their allies. While the general public was aware that Team RWBY had a hand in helping finally rid Remnant of Salem, they were far from the only huntresses who fought in the war, and they had kept the extent of their personal hardships to themselves. As a result, they held the comfortable status of hometown heroes and respected huntresses, but not the weight of superstar celebrities, meaning they were able to make their way down the sidewalk with their arms linked, enjoying the crisp morning air without being hassled.

As they walked, Weiss glanced over at Ruby, taking in her profile. Even from the side, her silver eyes sparkled with life and light. She got an even better view of them as Ruby turned to her. She could almost feel the power of the silver orbs staring into her blue ones. Or perhaps that was just the sensation of butterflies in her chest. She didn't really mind either way.

"I still can't believe you got us VIP invites to the grand opening of the new bakery in town!" Ruby said as she gave Weiss' arm an excited shake. "It's right next to my shop, so I've been watching the construction for the past few months. I some state-of-the-art ovens getting carried in, and they got a shipment of comfy-looking furniture just last week. I can't wait to see what it looks like now that it's finished!"

"I'm excited for you to see it as well. I have a feeling you'll really like it." Weiss said as they turned a corner.

"I'm sure I will, I've never been to a bakery that I didn't—" Ruby stopped walking and gasped loudly.

They had arrived.

A hundred feet away, their destination was nestled between their favorite combat skirt boutique, Dressed to Kill, and Ruby's weapon shop, which she'd affectionately named It's Also a Gun. The bakery's large glass windows had been covered with sheets of brown paper throughout the construction process, preventing Ruby from peeking inside, despite her best efforts. The paper was now gone, but she wasn't able to see most of the interior decoration due to the number of people that were already in the building.

Above the entrance was a sign that hadn't been there the day before. On each side was a large, ornate flower. Filigree trimming extended from the base of each bloom, resembling intertwined roots, forming the bottom of the sign's frame. The establishment's name was proudly displayed between the flowers in swooping cursive font.

White Rose Bakery & Cafe

"Wh-what? Is this…? Did you…? But, how…?" Ruby whispered breathlessly, her eyes still fixated on the sign.

"With great deal of time and planning, but I can already tell it was worth it." Weiss responded quietly.

"Didn't I make you promise to not buy me a bakery?" Ruby put her hands on her hips with a sassy, but not quite upset tone as she turned to her girlfriend.

Weiss grinned triumphantly. "You made me promise that I wouldn't buy you a bakery as a thank you gift. I made no promises about not buying a bakery because I know it would make the girl I love happy and because I think it would be a good investment anyway."

"I should have known you'd use a technicality like that." Ruby wrapped her arms around Weiss. "I love you."

"I love you too." Weiss said quietly she leaned in and gave Ruby a quick kiss.

"But you don't know the first thing about starting or running a bakery! And I know you couldn't have overseen this while running the SDC. Who helped you?"

Weiss tilted her head and grinned. "In a way, you did."

"I think I'd remember helping you with something like this!" Ruby said, gesturing grandly at the building.

"Well, you helped me pick the people who helped me. Although you didn't really know you were helping pick them." Weiss twirled some of her long hair around her index finger as she smiled blissfully at Ruby, taking in her girlfriend's reaction. "Do you remember that taste testing I took you to at the SDC headquarters about a year ago?"

"How could I forget?!" Ruby said enthusiastically. "We spent an entire Saturday tasting cookies, cakes... pastries and… coffee…" Her eyes widened a bit as she began to piece things together. "But you said I was helping decide who would get a catering contract with the SDC!"

"That much was true, and they've already catered several events for the company. I just left out the fact that the chefs that day were also competing for something else." Weiss' smile became mischievous. "The opportunity to design and run a new bakery in downtown Vale."

"Does that mean the chefs who baked the chocolate chip cookie that made me cry because it tasted so good…?"

"Are inside, probably putting a fresh batch in the display case."

"You're incredible." Ruby held Weiss tightly. "Just how long have you been planning this?" She asked with cheerful curiosity.

"Ever since that day on the airship. I knew we'd have to finish the whole 'save the world' thing before I could put my plan into motion, but that just meant I had a lot of time to think through the details." Weiss responded lovingly and slid her hands around Ruby's waist. "Shall we go inside?"

"We shall, but not yet!" Ruby said as she pulled out her scroll. "This is totally a 'home screen' moment!"

The two of them had continuously updated their home screens whenever they did something particularly fun or special together, with the most recent picture being from their visit to Blake and Yang's house in Menagerie. They snapped a quick photo and changed the settings on their scrolls before linking arms again and walking past the red and white balloons next to the front door.

When they entered, they were greeted by the scent of confectioner's sugar and the gentle sound of upbeat music. To their left, a small line led to a pair of cash registers that were attached to fully stocked display cases and a bar that extended the length of the wall. Lively girls wearing pink aprons were taking orders, grabbing pastries, and making coffee. Lacquered wood tables and cushioned chairs took up roughly two-thirds of the dining area. Couches and large coffee tables filled the remaining space, creating a communal lounge area.

As Ruby and Weiss approached the display cases, a woman approximately the same age as them walked out of a door behind the bar. The tall brunette had pale skin, purple eyes, and was wearing a chef's hat. When Weiss waved at her, the woman's expression lit up and she quickly poked her head back into the kitchen. A moment later, another woman with fair skin, light brown eyes, and wavy blonde hair appeared. The two held hands as they walked out from behind the counter.

"Weiss! Ruby! It's so good to see you!" The purple-eyed woman said warmly.

"Hi!" Ruby said, looking both excited and slightly embarrassed. "I'm really, really sorry, but I can't remember your names." She admitted.

The other chef smiled and waved her hand nonchalantly. "Don't worry, I don't think we even properly introduced ourselves at the tasting last year. I'm Madeleine, and this is my wife, Claire!"

"It's nice to meet you both again. This place is amazing." Ruby said, still in awe of her surroundings.

"The pleasure is all ours." Claire said, giving Madeleine's hand a squeeze. "We're so happy that we can finally share our cooking with the rest of Vale."

"Not to mention finally sharing the name of the place! Miss Snow-Angel-Investor over here really didn't want you finding out about her little scheme." Madeleine smirked and nodded in Weiss' direction. "We had to sign some intense nondisclosure agreements!"

Ruby rolled her eyes and nudged her girlfriend. "Sorry about that. Business Weiss can be kind of scary sometimes."

"Only when it's important business." Weiss blushed as she leaned slightly into Ruby before turning to the couple "And you both did a wonderful job with the preparations. I'm sure this place will be a complete success." She looked at them with sincere confidence.

"That means a lot to us." Claire said, her gaze drifting toward the brown eyes beside her. "We hope to be running it for a very long time."

"And we should probably get back to running it, but let me show you to your table first." Madeleine gestured for Ruby and Weiss to follow her as Claire returned to the front counter.

They made their way to the back wall, where a single unoccupied table was waiting with a small sign that said 'Reserved' in the same cursive font as the bakery's logo.

"Here you are." Madeleine said, plucking the sign from the table just as Claire reappeared with two large cookies held in parchment paper.

"And these are for you. If you want anything else, just let us know!" She handed the warm treats over before glancing lovingly at Madeleine. "Come on, sweetie."

"Right behind you, sugar." The other chef responded. The pair waved goodbye to Ruby and Weiss as they departed.

Ruby waved back at them until they weren't looking at her anymore. "This is all so perfect." Ruby mused as they took their seats. "The food, the atmosphere, the location, and the chefs are a couple too. What are the odds?"

"One hundred percent." Weiss responded with a simple shrug.

"Hmm?" Ruby raised an inquisitive eyebrow as she took a large bite of her cookie.

Weiss smiled adoringly as she used her thumb to wipe a stray crumb from the corner of Ruby's mouth. "You must have been too blinded by all the food at the tasting to notice that the chefs who served us were always in pairs. And were all women." She smiled lightheartedly. "I wanted this bakery to represent us in every way possible, so I did my research when selecting candidates for the tasting. All of the chefs that day were couples, so the odds of you selecting a couple to run the bakery was one hundred percent."

Ruby gulped down the mouthful of cookie. "You really did think of everything, didn't you?" She whispered happily.

"I certainly tried to. No amount of effort is too much if it's for you, Ruby." Weiss said lovingly. Under the table, she quietly slid her right hand into the pocket of her combat skirt.

Ruby blushed and took another large bite of her cookie. As she chewed, she became aware of the music playing in the bakery again.

~~~I won't need any dreams, it's all there if you're by my side~~~

A small shiver of tension went through her body. At some point, the bakery's cheerful playlist had arrived at a familiar tune and gotten all the way to its bridge without her realizing it. She and Weiss had managed to listen to the song a number of times over the past several years. In the weeks leading up to their final battle with Salem, they had made it a personal goal to listen to the piece in its entirety. A goal they accomplished.

However, that didn't mean their goal had been to make it through without crying. They knew they song would be an emotional one for them, but they sought to change it from a specter that haunted them into a memorial of sorts. But, every time they had listened to it, they did so intentionally. They had never encountered it by accident before, much less in public.

~~~Every moment's enough, and you take me to paradise~~~

Weiss noticed Ruby's expression and the song almost simultaneously. "Oh my gosh." She whispered frantically, her face going even paler than usual as she jumped out of her seat. "I swear I didn't tell them to play this. Stay here, I'll have them change it immediately." He combat skirt flared as she turned toward the bar.

~~~When I needed a hero, you knew it, and you were there~~~

"Wait."

Ruby's voice was steady as she grabbed Weiss' wrist, intercepting her before she could take her first step. "It's fine. I'm fine. I'd… like to listen to it with you."

~~~And I'm scared, but I'll open my heart up, I'm ready to dare~~~

Weiss look at Ruby with astonishment. "Are you sure?"

"I am."

~~~I know I've never felt like this before~~~

"Alright." Weiss pulled her arm gently, sliding her wrist through Ruby's fingers until their hands met. "I'm here for you."

~~~I never really knew what love was for~~~

"I know you are." Ruby whispered as Weiss took her seat again.

~~~I dreamed, but never did believe~~~

They then did something they had never done before.

"But baby, it's time to make up your mind."

Their singing was barely above a whisper, only loud enough the two of them to hear amongst the bustling chatter of the other customers.

"I think that tonight is when our stars align."

They saw tears in each other's eyes, but the tears were happy. Triumphant.

"Honey, it's now we leave the doubt behind."

They moved their free hands together, interlocking both pairs over the small table.

"Take my hand, cause you and I are gonna light the sky up till it's dawn, and baby, you and I are gonna shine."

Ruby and Weiss continued holding hands as the song faded, finally separating them so they could dry their eyes and finish their cookies.

"Thanks, Weiss." Ruby said before sighing cathartically. "This place is amazing, but I could really use some fresh air right now. Can we go for a walk?"

"Fresh air sounds wonderful." Weiss nodded in agreement as she stood and offered Ruby her hand once more.

The two waved to Claire and Madeleine as the left the bakery and took another moment to look at the sign outside of it before starting to walk around the city.

Their conversation didn't have any particular direction, nor did their feet. They simply enjoyed the sunny morning and each other's company.

"My feet are beginning to hurt." Weiss commented after they had been walking for nearly an hour. "Let's find a place to sit for a while."

"Yeah, my feet are starting to get tired as well." Ruby glanced around, approximating their location. "Oh! I know where we can go!" She scooped Weiss off her feet with a broad grin. "Ready?"

Weiss clutched Ruby's sleeves as she braced herself for what she knew was about to happen. "Ready."

A moment later, the world was a blur around her. A few moments after that, the world came back into focus, and she knew exactly where they were. She didn't even need to look down to know that she was being lowered onto a seat.

They were in a large, circular courtyard, sitting in one of the sturdy wooden benches that lined the perimeter of the otherwise open space. Gray slate covered the ground beneath them, as well as the walkways extending from opposite sides of the circle. One path went back to the city, and the other extended toward a collection of castle-like buildings, several of which were obviously newer than others. An insignia with two crossed axes emblazoned the center of the area.

"It's been a while since we've come here." Weiss said nostalgically.

They were in the front courtyard of Beacon Academy.

The courtyard was lively, but not overcrowded with students and visitors. A few people had briefly glanced in their direction due to the sudden burst of petals that heralded their arrival, but they were content to continue about their business.

"Yeah, it has. We were standing just over there when I fell into your luggage and then exploded." Ruby giggled quietly. "After that, I thought you'd never be my friend, much less my girlfriend." Ruby's words had a gentle, sincere happiness to them.

"If I'd had my way, you'd have taken that pamphlet on dust safety from me at the entrance ceremony later that day and never spoken to me again. Thank goodness things didn't go as I'd planned." Weiss scooted closer to Ruby and pressed the sides of their arms together.

"Most things haven't gone as planned for us over the years, have they?"

"I suppose they haven't. But somehow we wound up here, together."

"We have. And being with you is all that I need."

"I couldn't agree more."

They leaned into each other, sharing a quiet moment, which was interrupted by Ruby sighing wistfully.

"Weiss, I love you." Ruby sounded unusually serious. There was no hint of uncertainty in her declaration, which had been made many times before, but there was an unusual amount of weight behind her words.

"I love you too, Ruby." Weiss responded with a comforting tone, as she gently touched Ruby's arm. "So very much. In fact, I've been wanting to have a conversation with you about just how much I love you."

"You… you have?" Ruby looked at Weiss carefully. "What type of conversation?"

A slight blush reached Weiss' face. "Well, um… you see, it's about our… what did you call it… mutually consented trial period of courtship?"

Ruby looked stunned for a moment. "Wait! That's what I want to discuss too! You don't mean…" She paused with her mouth half open as she pointed a trembling finger at Weiss.

Weiss leaned back slightly. "H-huh? Wait, Ruby, you couldn't possibly…" The gears in her head spun, landing on the only logical explanation. "Hold on!" She scrambled around, her hand rummaging into her combat skirt's pocket.

Ruby began floundering about, realizing what was happening. "No! Wait! I… I want to say it!" Her hand flew into her own pocket and grasped around for the item she'd double checked was with her before leaving their apartment earlier that morning.

They became still as they found what they were looking for, hands still hidden from sight. They stared at each other, looking equally frantic and exhilarated.

"But Ruby, I want to be the one to—"

"No way, I've waited way too long to not ask you myself!"

"I've wanted to ask you for ages though! I—Fine! We'll ask at the same time!"

"Deal!"

They mirrored each other's movements, swiftly pulling small boxes out of their pockets, opening them with outstretched arms, and speaking simultaneously.

"Weiss, will you—"

"Ruby, will you—"

"YES OF COURSE I'LL MARRY YOU!"

As they embraced and kissed passionately, the open boxes fell from to the ground below, the rings inside them glittering brilliantly in the midday sun.

A/N: In the author's notes of my previous chapter, I said, "I don't anticipate having nearly as much trouble writing the final 'free day' chapter." So much for that!

First, I got delayed by several weeks due to hectic (but positive) circumstances. When I finally sat down to write the chapter, I almost immediately realized I didn't like the flow of events as I had initially envisioned them and spent a day writing and scrapping paragraphs. After taking a few days to step away, I hit a stride and wrote out most of the chapter, but then hit a brick wall in the final scene.

While my endgame was always a simultaneous proposal, I couldn't find the right words for the two of them to say in the moments leading up to the proposal itself. The scene alone took over a month of on and off thought. If it had been any scene other than the literal finale of the story, I'd have forced myself to publish something after a day or two, but I refused to let myself release the chapter until I was at least mostly satisfied with the ending. Even now, I don't know if I consider it perfect, but it feels as good as anything that I as a first-time fanfic writer could make without running the risk of the story never actually getting finished.

Aside from the final scene, I feel very good about how the rest of the chapter turned out. I really enjoyed bringing several things from previous chapters back, such as the bakery, combat skirts with pockets, coffee, and "Shine".

While I actively avoided creating any original characters in the earlier chapters, my setup for the bakery required chefs, and while I considered not having them actually appear, the idea of them being a couple to parallel Ruby and Weiss occurred to me and felt too fun to not use, so I spent several hours deciding what Claire and Madeleine's names and appearances would be. Claire's is based on a éclair, and Madeleine's inspiration is the French cookie of the same name. I felt that both pastries had a distinct enough appearance and color to satisfy the "color naming" rule of the RWBY universe. It might be a bit of a stretch, but I also wanted to keep the odds of the names I used appearing in the actual series to a minimum.

While this final chapter took significantly longer than I had ever hoped it would, I still really enjoyed the process of White Rose Week (months, for me, I suppose) and plan to do it again next year, but with either greater planning or without the goal of writing extended chapters and a continuous story. My direction will largely hinge upon the state of my personal schedule as the week approaches next year.

I cannot thank you enough for joining me in the adventure of my first fanfic. Every view count, favorite/kudo, follow/favorite, comment/review means a great deal to me. If you had any favorite parts, I'd love to know what they were. I hope my writing was able to bring you some joy, and I hope to see you all again next year.

Keep moving forward!

#white rose week #white rose #whiterose #rwby #fiction #weiss schnee #ruby rose #submission #day 8

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lansizhuis · 5 years

Text

WEILAN FIC REC

It's as the title says - the five times Shen Wei did a horny grip™ because let it be known that while Zhao Yunlan is explicitly shamelessly thirsty, Shen Wei is equally as thirsty but in a more lowkey manner. Oh, and of course, WeiLan as lesbians can't be passed up for this.(gift fic for taki who introduced the weilan lesbian agenda to me!)Hello! I finally had some time (spoiler: I actually didn’t but I can always have time for my dads) to properly make a compilation of WeiLan fanfic recommendations. I included some CN ones bc I absolutely love them to bits and pieces and some WeiLan derivatives bc why not.

Please click the kudos and leave a comment on the authors’ works to thank them and show your appreciation! <3 This will be updated periodically.

bc I’m shameless - imma shove my own weilan fics here

Title: Uhaw Summary: Shen Wei felt a smile on his face despite the seriousness of the situation. “Your loyalty will forever remain divided.” // “My loyalty is with you.” Zhao Yunlan declared. “Always has been, always will be.” [WEILAN MAFIA/GANGSTER AU 1/1] Notes: i was horny for weilan being horny for each other and being a power couple with some plot thrown in the mix im not sorry

Title: Devour Your God Summary: "The beast inside him howls and the inhumane thunderous chanting resounds in the beautiful ghost king. You remember don’t you? The more beautiful the ghost...the more terrifying."

[a look through shen wei's eyes as he goes through kunlun's multiple reincarnations until zhao yunlan; novel-compliant and shen san extra hints but should be spoiler free 1/1] Notes: sometimes we’re also sad in our weilan lives but do know they get their happy ending anyway

Title: Earlier On Summary: Zhao Yunlan starts remembering his life as Kunlun months after he first entered the world and his only clue resides on that creature (because his adult brain is now telling his baby brain that that wasn't a human) robed in white with a golden mask peering down on his crib. Notes: [novel-verse gift fic for orro AKA babey zhao yunlan having adult brain/memories who’s everyone’s source of headache]

Title: Five Times Shen Wei Did A Horny Grip Summary: It's as the title says - the five times Shen Wei did a horny grip™ because let it be known that while Zhao Yunlan is explicitly shamelessly thirsty, Shen Wei is equally as thirsty but in a more lowkey manner. Oh, and of course, WeiLan as lesbians can't be passed up for this. Notes: (gift fic for taki who introduced the weilan lesbian agenda to me!)

Title: Some Things Stay The Same and Some Don't Summary: “Xiao Wei,” Zhao Yunlan called in a serious voice making Shen Wei stiffen in attention, “Your boobs are actually big, aren’t they?” Shen Wei almost slipped from her position at the unexpected - or well, this is Zhao Yunlan so perhaps ‘expected’ should be the term - comment. “Yunlan, honestly!” “No really, it’s bigger than mine.” “Everyone’s bigger than your tiny mangoes, stupid owner.” Da Qing laughed from the kitchen. “I think even Lin Jing and Lao Chu have bigger ones compared to you.” Notes: lesbian!weilans part 2 for emmy featuring the primordial gods, shen wei + mama zhao interaction, and kunlun taking in 2 ghost queens instead of just one

Title: Repercussions of Meddling Summary: “You know what the diviner’s instructions were, right? Gather the hallows and let fate run its course or else there can be dire consequences.” Zhao Yunlan clenched his fist as he recalls Shen Wei’s hardships paralleled with Ye Zun’s loss of sanity, the ghost lovers’ fate in an effort to protect him, the brewing war as the vision the hallows have given him on their deaths, and an ever burning flame on his soul as he watched Shen Wei disappear stay clear.“There can’t be anything more dire than that future.” The two leaders looked at each other meaningfully. “And if the bulk of the repercussions on you twisting the timeline falls on you?” Zhao Yunlan huffed in amusement and flipped his long hair to his back. “If I'm the one who has to pay then so be it.” Notes: aka ye zun is a bad influence to shen wei and add that in for 10,000 years where they're both awake, alive, and together waiting for a certain someone's reappearance in their lives --- THIS CAN GET DARK; drama canon divergence au where zhao yunlan as kunlun ends up saving ye zun in the past and meddling with time

Title: A Path Back Home Summary: The Dixing kingdom's delegation set off for a peace treaty with the kingdom of Haixing as new tides of the world was coming. For some, this was a turning point for the three kingdoms. For Ye Zun and his father, this was a chance to bring back their two other family members home with them. The past retains its stories and secrets, the present shakes the foundations of everyone's belief, and the future is a path back home. (read a/n before reading!) Notes: weilan royalty a/b/o au aka the most self-indulgent fic (it wasn’t supposed to be multi-chap but brain said ‘world building’ and now i suffer)

Title: where everything converges Summary: collection for weilan week prompts - day 1: beginnings (SID+SW meets the youngest primordial god) day 3: au (tgcf au of god!ZYL and ghost king!SW) day 7: anniversary (there will come a day where SW wakes up to the 5,000 years and 1 day of being with ZYL)

Title: in all worlds and in all timelines Summary: collection of weilan prompts (do send some and i’ll see if i can write it!)

Title: The Power of Words Summary: “You have lived for as long as I have and so you must know that words have power. The likes of old sayings and proverbs hold a decree to them the longer it’s passed around from one breathing soul to another. They become entities and binding spells on their own through time.”

“What has that got to do with anything right now? Ghost Slayer, you are already treading a dangerous path with the choices you have made the past months. Do I still need to remind you of this?” the spirit asked.

The black robed creature acted as if he didn’t hear his companion and spoke once more. “I suppose it doesn’t matter right as of this moment,” he crossed his legs and continued, “Let me tell you a story; a secret.” Notes: it was supposed to be a oneshot but my need for novel shen wei characterization bled through so now it’s a 3shot *sigh*

***

Title: 狗在江湖 Notes: this is a mix of novel and drama elements AND it’s a/b/o AND it has 30 chapters so obv i cried

Title: Sweet Dreams Summary: 朱白ABO，架空末世微悬疑。 Notes: okay so it was weird for me at first bc they were using zhubai’s names until i realized they were pertaining to weilan derivative in general AND OKAY LISTEN - the plot??? THE PLOT??? GLORIOUS

Title: 我说所有的酒都不如你 Summary: 这大概是一个东江二哈狼和东江气死猫你追我跑你继续追我假装跑你拼命追我跑不动了的爱情故事（。 Notes: 2Luo aka Luo Fusheng x Luo Fei weilan derivative and this is legit my favorite derivative fic!!! they mixed both dramas and fed me sentinel + guide trope AND THEN WOW PLOT

***

Title: Black Cloak Reversed Summary: Chief Zhao is a little too friendly with the Black-Cloaked Envoy. The members of the SID worry that he's being emotionally disloyal to Professor Shen. Notes: drama; zhao yunlan is a filthy, thirsty man and SID mourns over this fact

Title: my heart broke loose on the wind Summary: If Yunlan is going to learn how to make actual food that requires more effort than just boiling water and putting hot water into stuff, he’s going to have to take all the notes. “Right,” he says to himself. “How hard can it be?” He watches all twenty-two minutes and fourteen seconds of Chef Shen's video without fast-forwarding. When it comes to an end, he clicks on the replay button. He ends up taking zero notes, and the only thing he manages to learn from the whole exercise is that Chef Shen -Shen Wei- is really fucking beautiful when he smiles. Notes: au; alternative summary - ye zun: how thirsty are you for my bro zhao yunlan: thirsty? pls im a paragon of all things holy, i am a kind and generous citizen of the world, i am - ye zun: i can help you get in his pants zhao yunlan: - thirsty af; i am very thirsty

Title: when we reunite, the world will tilt on its axis Summary: Zhao Yunlan tries to figure out how he should approach the matter of young Shen Wei. Notes: drama; babey!shen wei who's so earnest and genuinely in-love ahhh im soft

Title: Wild Thing, Stop Your Teasing Summary: Shen Wei’s eyelid twitch as Yunlan unwraps another lollipop, closes his spit-shiny lips around the spherical head while looking at Shen Wei under dark eyes and thick lashes. Fists clenched on his pant leg, Shen Wei swallows and tamps down the urge to grab Yunlan across the table. Notes: drama; when you think zhao yunlan's thirst has a limit - he goes an open his mouth but hey shen wei's head over heels thousands of years ago already anyway

Title: Tease the Wild Thing Summary: Yunlan's POV from shaenanigans' awesome fic ''Wild Thing, Stop your Teasing''. Yeah, it's the one with the lollipops, and the porn with feels. You know. The Good Stuff. Notes: more weilan smut after the one above?? SIGN ME TF UP

Title: without complexities or pride Summary: “Kunlun Hall’s rules do not apply to you,” Yunlan says simply, moving to steep some tea for Shen Wei. “You are the Black Cloak Envoy. Lord Kunlun holds you in high regard.” “And you hold him in high regard,” Shen Wei adds before he’s able to stop himself. Shen Wei can hear the wretched jealousy in his own voice, and no doubt Yunlan can as well, because Yunlan’s smile turns sly, and his eyes are very knowing when he says, “In a way, I suppose I do.” Notes: (Or, the Not-Exactly-A-Courtesan!Yunlan fic.) >> im crying bc YES

Title: Every ridge hand-picked by the late sun’s slant light Summary: Zhao Yunlan gets up to greet this man, his destiny – who is currently scowling behind his fancy embroidered mask – and smiles as filthily as he can make it. Whatever else they might be to each other, Shen Wei has been taunting him for weeks. Zhao Yunlan is going to take him home and fuck him until he cries and he wants Shen Wei to know that. “Long time, no see,” he says. The Black Cloaked Envoy blanches. Notes: when i say i thirst for weilan papapa where shen wei loses his self control - I MEAN IT

Title: that's where you belong Summary: First of all, how dare Shen Wei. Second of all, Zhao Yunlan has been looking forward to this for like, as long as he's been aware that Shen Wei is an alpha. Third of all -- Notes: im crying bc all i ever wanted was for novel weilan's characterization bc i know their papapa would be the hottest with that and i have been fed with this need and even partnered w/ a/b/o trope /SOBS

Title: Just Cared Too Much Summary: Zhao Yun Lan found out his father was dead while he was pouring concrete down the throat of a backstabbing dickbag. “Chief, I'm sorry, the Boss is gone. Shot to the head, on his way to meet the Russians.” Notes: i was dying to have a mafia au and this appeared THANK YOU; and def one of the other things that pushed me to finish my own mafia au for weilan lol

Title: 家教 - or - Domestic Education Summary: Shen Wei is the Ghost King, born out of the unyielding chaos of entropy that had consumed the underworld before the creation of the wheel of reincarnation. He's the cosmic guardian of death and all her darlings, and the universe through the lens of his eye is rife with demons, hungry ghosts, and shadows creeping out of their places. So there is absolutely no way he is getting sick. Notes: im novel verse trash and we get that PLUS mama!zhao uhh hell yes???

Title: Sarva Summary: Or, 一切. At work, in public, Shen Wei is meticulously, seamlessly polite. In bed, he's something else. Notes: this was the first weilan smut i read AND ALL THE YES BC SHEN WEI LOSING IT FOR ZHAO YUNLAN IS MY KINK

Title: Future Forged Summary: Masquerading as Kunlun, Zhao Yunlan sets out on a mission to recover the stolen Hallows alongside the young Shen Wei. Along the way, he discovers new abilities, forges new bonds, unearths old histories, and learns that the universe goes beyond his wildest imagination. Notes: lol way better take on what happened during that time travel thing than what the drama had

Title: who you allow Summary: But then Zhao Yunlan goes and gets a haircut, and Shen Wei. Pouts. For like three days. Notes: for the record - i, too, believe shen wei will pout bc of this

Title: Significant Other Colour Summary: Collars are so old-fashioned and Zhao Yunlan can’t help but feel that there’s an ulterior motive hiding behind Shen Wei’s innocently widened eyes. Notes: tfw i've tried to bury my needs on acknowledging how shen wei canonically wants to lock up zhao yunlan and then this fic hits me - author pls let me love you (for y'all heed the warnings)

Title: Afterimage Summary: Zhu Yi Long is an awkward turtle. Now he has to deal with letting Shen Wei and Ye Zun go. Notes: okay so im not really into fics on real people but this was done so well? it explores the effects of zhu yilong's method acting and sets straight that zhubai and weilan are not one and the same at the end of the day

Title: Twill Seeker Summary: The young master has a thing for the butler. The butler is at the end of his rope. Notes: if anyone comes after me and my apparent need for butler shen wei and young master zhao yunlan, hide me

Title: When You're Old, You Want To Celebrate Birthdays At Home Summary: Shen Wei comes home to a surprise. Notes: me, wiping a tear: oh look, a ye zun characterization i actually like even if he's mentioned only

Title: do nothing day Summary: “The stress of work is exhausting me and my wife is scolding me now,” Zhao Yunlan pretends to whine, hiding his face in the blankets. “You’ve seen who I work with, those stubborn kids who cause me nothing but trouble. You’re supposed to be on my side, meant to pity me when the world turns against me. I deserve this day off and I reserve the right to do as I please. And if I want to be a slug in the bed then that’s what I’m going to do.” Notes: "It’s so gentle that Shen Wei almost can’t stand it, the way Zhao Yunlan lets him do as he likes, just receiving whatever Shen Wei wants to give him. And there’s so much that Shen Wei wants to lavish onto his Zhao Yunlan." -- dont bother for the ambulance i know im DOA

Title: Heat and Desire Summary: Five times Zhao Yunlan had an oral fixation and one time Shen Wei did something about it. Notes: "You tease me, Zhao Yunlan," Shen Wei whispers, his breath tickling against Zhao Yunlan’s ear. "You tease me and you tease me and you seem to think that I won't do anything about it." -- me, choking: IM FINE

Title: Just A Phone Call Away Summary: Chief Zhao gets hurt on a case and nobody wants to be the one to call Professor Shen and tell him.... Notes: SID family + shen wei's first reaction to the call??? sign me up

Title: Never Losing You Summary: Yunlan can't open his eyes, can't shut his mouth. Needy, keening noises pour out of his throat completely out of his control. Shen Wei's closed fist is around him, pumping fast and tight in rhythm to his fucking, making him see stars exploding behind closed eyelids, thoroughly engulfed by the incredible sensations racketing up and down his spine originating from where they're so deliciously joined. Shen Wei's other hand cradles his jaw, careful, reverent, but also serves to ground Yunlan to the bed so Shen Wei can fuck him harder, deeper. Notes: i can never have enough weilan papapa bc if canon doesn't give me the explicit juicy details then im turning to fic writers with metaphorical gold payment

Title: third time's the charm Summary: “I’m what Da Qing likes to describe as ‘especially tenacious’ when I’m in heat, even more so when I have a specific Alpha in mind,” Yunlan tells him, casual. (Or, three times Shen Wei helps Zhao Yunlan through his heat.) Notes: me, looking through the window with a faraway look: a/b/o universe makes me weak even if it's not even explicit

Title: this secret language that we speak Summary: "If you don't want to do this any more," says Shen Wei, "you get off the couch, and we'll do whatever you want. Do you understand?" Zhao Yunlan is so hot he thinks he's going to light the couch on fire. He swallows and nods."I didn't hear you," says Shen Wei, implacable as death. "Do you understand?" Zhao Yunlan has to clear his throat, and when he manages to speak, his voice is gravelled with arousal. "Yeah. I do." "Good," says Shen Wei. Notes: i cried 69 times bc my horny ass is fed and jfc domineering shen wei??? *cries for the 70th time*

Title: Shen Wei Summary: Shen Wei loves Zhao Yunlan, and there is only so long he can feign otherwise. Notes: [Zhao Yunlan gives a small shrug, uninvested in the argument. “All right. And where do you belong?” Shen Wei freezes, flashes of memory assaulting him, of Kunlun’s skin hot against his, of promises moaned against each other’s necks. Inside you is all he can think.] BINCH I DIED AT THIS PART

Title: Sweet Dreams Are Made Of This Summary: Zhao Yunlan jerks back to the waking world gasping and screaming and drowning in the anguish that comes with being lit on eternal consuming fire. The unmistakable rich copper taste of blood fills his mouth and he opens tear-filled bloodshot eyes that he was sure melted a long time ago with the rest of his physical body. He sees faces crowding around him in varying degrees of worry, but the pain blinds him from putting names to the faces. His throat feels raw, as if he'd been screaming for centuries and realizes on the next breath that he's been screaming a name. Shen Wei's name. Notes: drama-verse but a hopeful one TYL im here for the whole the last episode didn’t happen bc we can use the plot that the drama threw away lol

Title: Aftermath Summary: The fallout after the dust has settled. Notes: a look on what happened after the 4th extra in the novel; s o f t

Title: The world that we'll invent Summary: Shen Wei's self-control continues to be tested. Notes: [Nothing in Shen Wei's long existence has prepared him for the problem that is Zhao Yunlan.] >> honestly this is the summary of weilan in general

Title: Quiet Heart, Hollow Body Summary: It has been ten thousand years since Shen Wei met Kunlun, but he could never forget the one who first saw beyond the mask of the Black Cloaked Envoy to the person beneath. Notes: im novel bias for so many reasons but this was absolutely amazing as a drama setting bc it /is/ closer to the novel setting bc shen wei was actually awake those 10,000 years so that desperation and intensity of novel!sw is closer here - really great read

last updated: March 2, 2020

#weilan #shen wei #zhao yunlan #zhenhun #镇魂 #guardian #zhinfo

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caitsbooks · 5 years

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6 Summer Adult Romances!

Click here to view the full post on my blog, or read more to find out more about these books!

Despite still feeling kinda new to the romance genre, I wanted to compile a list of some of my favorite romance novel’s I’ve read, that I think are perfect for summer.

Whether you’ll be reading on the beach or nice and comfortable in air conditioning, these books will be the perfect addition to your summer!!

Read more for descriptions of each book, plus check out my blog to see 6 YA Romances that are perfect for summer!

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THE HATING GAME BY SALLY THORNE

Page Count: 387 pages Publisher: William Morrow Release Date: August 9th, 2016 Purchase Options: Amazon, Indiebound, Barnes and Noble [ Click Here For My Full Review ]

“Lucy Hutton has always been certain that the nice girl can get the corner office. She’s charming and accommodating and prides herself on being loved by everyone at Bexley & Gamin. Everyone except for coldly efficient, impeccably attired, physically intimidating Joshua Templeman. And the feeling is mutual. Trapped in a shared office together 40 (OK, 50 or 60) hours a week, they’ve become entrenched in an addictive, ridiculous never-ending game of one-upmanship. There’s the Staring Game. The Mirror Game. The HR Game. Lucy can’t let Joshua beat her at anything—especially when a huge new promotion goes up for the taking. If Lucy wins this game, she’ll be Joshua’s boss. If she loses, she’ll resign. So why is she suddenly having steamy dreams about Joshua, and dressing for work like she’s got a hot date? After a perfectly innocent elevator ride ends with an earth-shattering kiss, Lucy starts to wonder whether she’s got Joshua Templeman all wrong. Maybe Lucy Hutton doesn’t hate Joshua Templeman. And maybe, he doesn’t hate her either. Or maybe this is just another game.”

This book is what finally pushed me into reading adult romances. Yeah, I had read a couple before this one, but this is the book that made me fall in love with the genre. I know it’s been talked about by most everyone, but if you haven’t read it yet, this summer is the perfect time (especially with the movie in the works)!

THE KISS QUOTIENT (THE KISS QUOTIENT #1) BY HELEN HOANG

Page Count: 333 pages Publisher: Berkley Release Date: June 5th, 2018 Purchase Options: Amazon, Indiebound, Barnes and Noble [ Click Here For My Full Review ]

“Stella Lane thinks math is the only thing that unites the universe. She comes up with algorithms to predict customer purchases — a job that has given her more money than she knows what to do with, and way less experience in the dating department than the average thirty-year-old. It doesn’t help that Stella has Asperger’s and French kissing reminds her of a shark getting its teeth cleaned by pilot fish. Her conclusion: she needs lots of practice — with a professional. Which is why she hires escort Michael Phan. The Vietnamese and Swedish stunner can’t afford to turn down Stella’s offer, and agrees to help her check off all the boxes on her lesson plan — from foreplay to more-than-missionary position… Before long, Stella not only learns to appreciate his kisses, but to crave all the other things he’s making her feel. Soon, their no-nonsense partnership starts making a strange kind of sense. And the pattern that emerges will convince Stella that love is the best kind of logic… ”

Firstly, if you aren’t a fan of series, don’t worry. This is just a series of companion novels, so you don’t have to commit to them. But trust me when I say, after reading this, you will want to. I just love this book so much. These characters are just absolutely amazing and you will not regret picking this up!

JOSH AND HAZEL’S GUIDE TO NOT DATING BY CHRISTINA LAUREN

Page Count: 309 pages Publisher: Gallery Books Release Date: September 4th, 2018 Purchase Options: Amazon, Indiebound, Barnes and Noble [ Click Here For My Full Review ]

“Hazel Camille Bradford knows she’s a lot to take—and frankly, most men aren’t up to the challenge. If her army of pets and thrill for the absurd don’t send them running, her lack of filter means she’ll say exactly the wrong thing in a delicate moment. Their loss. She’s a good soul in search of honest fun. Josh Im has known Hazel since college, where her zany playfulness proved completely incompatible with his mellow restraint. From the first night they met—when she gracelessly threw up on his shoes—to when she sent him an unintelligible email while in a post-surgical haze, Josh has always thought of Hazel more as a spectacle than a peer. But now, ten years later, after a cheating girlfriend has turned his life upside down, going out with Hazel is a breath of fresh air. Not that Josh and Hazel date. At least, not each other. Because setting each other up on progressively terrible double blind dates means there’s nothing between them…right?”

I have two Christina Lauren books on this list because I am addicted to their books. However, this one is by far my favorite of theirs. It’s a friends-to-lovers done so well, you won’t be able to put it down. I know I wasn’t able to.

RED, WHITE, AND ROYAL BLUE BY CASEY MCQUISTON

Page Count: 423 pages Publisher: St. Martin’s Griffin Release Date: May 14th, 2019 Purchase Options: Amazon, Indiebound, Barnes and Noble [ Click Here For My Full Review ]

“First Son Alex Claremont-Diaz is the closest thing to a prince this side of the Atlantic. With his intrepid sister and the Veep’s genius granddaughter, they’re the White House Trio, a beautiful millennial marketing strategy for his mother, President Ellen Claremont. International socialite duties do have downsides—namely, when photos of a confrontation with his longtime nemesis Prince Henry at a royal wedding leak to the tabloids and threaten American/British relations.

The plan for damage control: staging a fake friendship between the First Son and the Prince. Alex is busy enough handling his mother’s bloodthirsty opponents and his own political ambitions without an uptight royal slowing him down. But beneath Henry’s Prince Charming veneer, there’s a soft-hearted eccentric with a dry sense of humor and more than one ghost haunting him.

As President Claremont kicks off her reelection bid, Alex finds himself hurtling into a secret relationship with Henry that could derail the campaign and upend two nations. And Henry throws everything into question for Alex, an impulsive, charming guy who thought he knew everything: What is worth the sacrifice? How do you do all the good you can do? And, most importantly, how will history remember you?”

You all knew I would have to put this book on here. It’s my obsession. The love of my life. I know this book is getting a lot of hype right now, but let me tell you, it deserves all of it. This book is really something special. Not only is it an adorable romance with enemies-to-lovers and plenty of wit, but it’s also a powerful read that you don’t want to miss.

THE UNHONEYMOONERS BY CHRISTINA LAUREN

Page Count: 400 Publisher: May 14th, 2019 Release Date: Gallery Books Purchase Options: Amazon, Indiebound, Barnes and Noble [ Click Here For My Full Review ]

“Olive is always unlucky: in her career, in love, in…well, everything. Her identical twin sister Ami, on the other hand, is probably the luckiest person in the world. Her meet-cute with her fiancé is something out of a romantic comedy (gag) and she’s managed to finance her entire wedding by winning a series of Internet contests (double gag). Worst of all, she’s forcing Olive to spend the day with her sworn enemy, Ethan, who just happens to be the best man. Olive braces herself to get through 24 hours of wedding hell before she can return to her comfortable, unlucky life. But when the entire wedding party gets food poisoning from eating bad shellfish, the only people who aren’t affected are Olive and Ethan. And now there’s an all-expenses-paid honeymoon in Hawaii up for grabs. Putting their mutual hatred aside for the sake of a free vacation, Olive and Ethan head for paradise, determined to avoid each other at all costs. But when Olive runs into her future boss, the little white lie she tells him is suddenly at risk to become a whole lot bigger. She and Ethan now have to pretend to be loving newlyweds, and her luck seems worse than ever. But the weird thing is that she doesn’t mind playing pretend. In fact, she feels kind of… lucky.”

While Josh and Hazel’s Guide to Not Dating may be my favorite Christina Lauren book, this one is pretty close. Enemies-to-lovers, fake datings, and basically every other classic trope everyone loves found their way into this extremely fun read.

WELL MET BY JEN DELUCA

Page Count: 336 Publisher: Berkley Release Date: September 3rd, 2019 Purchase Options: Amazon, Indiebound, Barnes and Noble [ Click Here For My Review Teaser ]

“Emily knew there would be strings attached when she relocated to the small town of Willow Creek, Maryland, for the summer to help her sister recover from an accident, but who could anticipate getting roped into volunteering for the local Renaissance Faire alongside her teenaged niece? Or that the irritating and inscrutable schoolteacher in charge of the volunteers would be so annoying that she finds it impossible to stop thinking about him? The faire is Simon’s family legacy and from the start he makes clear he doesn’t have time for Emily’s lighthearted approach to life, her oddball Shakespeare conspiracy theories, or her endless suggestions for new acts to shake things up. Yet on the faire grounds he becomes a different person, flirting freely with Emily when she’s in her revealing wench’s costume. But is this attraction real, or just part of the characters they’re portraying? This summer was only ever supposed to be a pit stop on the way to somewhere else for Emily, but soon she can’t seem to shake the fantasy of establishing something more with Simon, or a permanent home of her own in Willow Creek.”

Okay, I know this one won’t be published until summer is over, but I need to mention it. It’s absolutely amazing! Seriously, it’s completely worth the wait. The relationship is so perfect, the characters are all amazing, and it takes place at a Ren Faire!!! What more could you ask for?

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What is your favorite summer romance? I really need some good recommendations!!

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mentalcurls · 5 years

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3.5 Ammucchiate

Here’s a masterpost of my thoughts on and reactions to 3.5 Ammucchiate, translated from this post, that I mostly compiled from my tweets from that day, because I had A LOT to say. They’re not properly in chronological order and I’ve added a couple of observations I made in hindsight at the end of the season.

While the girlsquad is singing “Bello e impossibile”, Emma sings along and she touches Marti’s shoulder to catch his attention and communicate to him something like “Hey, hear me out, I’m singing about you” but he’s impassive, then lowers the sunglasses to his eyes and doesn’t smile until his eyes are hidden by the lenses

“Bello e impossibile”, by the way, stops right when Emma says “Io adoro i gay”/”I love gay people”, so right at the beginning of Niccolò’s roast

So let’s talk about Niccolò roasting Emma: first thing he does is retract his arms from around Marti’s and Emma’s shoulders (breaking the united front of the three “disertori del terrazzo” he himself had established earlier), then he makes the most unimpressed face ever, then he quotes an extreme example that forces a polarization (“Tutti gli arabi sono terroristi”/”All Arabs are terrorists”; this is a bit of a fallacy, but it’s also a pretty smart move because it makes Emma sound homophobic by association and forces Marti to side with Nico in the event he needs to choose between the two of them), while he could have chosen as an example of generalising something like “All women are bad at driving”, which would have been closer to Emma’s personal experience, but also closer to a direct attack on her (therefore counterproductive if Martino had to pick sides)

Kudos to Niccolò for studying Greek and Latin rhetoric very well, and philosophy too, YAY FOR LICEO CLASSICO

Martino’s dumbstruck expression when he breaks away from kissing Emma, aka when he hears that Niccolò has gone to them and is talking to them. Marti, by the way, doesn’t smile at all during the rest of the conversation with Niccolò (whereas when he was alone with Emma he smiled most of the time, but with his eyes hidden by the sunglasses, which makes me think they were fake smiles)

(I do believe Marti’s positive reactions during the conversation about Apparat were genuine)

Niccolò Fares sitting on the couch between two people who were making out until a second before without an hint of shame, which means he not only positions himself near Marti and manages to put his arm around Martino’s shoulders, but he also physically separates his boy from his love rival Emma. An inspiration.

DID THEY REALLY HAVE TO USE ELIO of all possible names, in the year of CMBYN (I know the reference here is to Elio Germano, not Pearlman, but my brain only recognizes some types of references)

LATENT HOMOSEXUALITY did he really say that oh God help me

Can we talk about the way Niccolò says “homosexuality” in a normal way, the emphasizes “latent” stressing every syllable?

My heart hurts both because of Nico’s little speech about generalising and because of the way Marti and Emma just leave him alone on the couch

Niccolò looking at his hands, his smile disappearing and the corners of his mouth turning down

During Self Control, Martino doesn’t consider Covitti at all, she tries to get his attention dancing closer, putting her arms around his neck, turning his face to kiss him but 2 seconds later he breaks the kiss and even when she goes for his neck he completely ignores her (p.s.: and we know now that Marti actually likes “neck action” a lot so this is very significant)

This lasts until Niccolò starts watching him, of course, then Marti has to try and make him jealous(?)/show off(?)/follow some kind of weird mating ritual (?)

Martino doesn’t stop watching Niccolò even when he stops watching Marti

10 minutes standing ovation for Rocco Fasano’s eyes 🔥🔥🔥

So that was Martino in the Self Control scene, now let’s talk about Eva. Her expressions! At first she smiles, then she sees Marti with Emma and she stops smiling, she studies them, she notices Marti is distracted, then when they start making out she makes a face and turns away (p.s.: she’s definitely disappointed, because at this point the things she knows are 1) that Marti told her he likes her before the summer 2) he allegedly made her and Gio broke up because of that 3) he has gay porn on his phone 4) he hasn’t approached her and he turned her down just a couple of weeks before with an excuse, so up until now her working theory is that he’s gay, has a thing for Gio, lied to her cause he’s in the closet/in denial; except now? he’s kissing Emma? a girl? who’s not her? She feels confused and betrayed, a feeling that stays with her at least until 7.1 Era per lui)

Then there’s Federica, poor thing, heartbroken and for the completely wrong reason

Eva directing everybody to hide any and all evidence of the party is very me tbh

(except that if it was me and I sent one person out with the trash and he DOESN?T COME BACK AT ALL, I’d kill him? I mean, I appreciate the moment as a fan, but not as my group of friends’ designated problem-solver)

Martino and Emma freezing and not doing anything even after Eva yells “Regà che cazzo mi guardate, dai, dai!” and freaks out

Maddalena and Emma are shown while they do the same thing aka taking the red cloth off the lamps (and this details gives me feels that are entirely unreasonable given that I was about to link this detail to Schopenhauer’s Veil of Maya) (p.s.: I mean, there’s definitely a lot of symbolic meaning I couldn’t quite articulate at the time of the clip, because unveiling = revealing and this is the clip in which the boys reveal their mutual attraction beyond any doubt, plus it’s Emma and Maddi “eliminating” the red light which is so important for Marti and Nico’s relationship, it’s their thing for their most intimate moments)

“Elio” and “Colino” keep silent for 11 second after throwing the trash in the bins, 11 second of fidgeting, 11 second of I’m-looking-I’m-not-looking, 11 seconds of awkwardness, 11 secondi of disaster gay Marti not knowing whether to say something or not

BAM! Niccolò smiles, steals a joke from Emma and Martino starts smiling again for the first time since Nico arrived to the party, since he interrupted Emma to kiss her (and no glasses this time!)

COLINO

God, how sad is this pet name? The allergy pseudo-explanation is even worse, sorry Maddalena, you do you, but Colino is afwul

Martino: ”How long have you been together?” Niccolò: "Since we were 16, but we’ve known each other since middle school. To be honest, we’re more like siblings than anything else. We haven’t fucked in, like, two months.” Let’s analyze this answer: Niccolò gives the information Marti requested, adds a relevant qualifier, then an unnecessary qualifier and another even more unnecessary information (that’s unnecessary when compared with the literal content of the conversation, discounting the context, [which is Niccolò trying to justify his being with Maddalena while undressing Martino with his eyes at every chance to Marti himself])

Marti’s confusion when Nico says “But I can’t break up with her” breaks my hearts, just like the fact that despite everything he genuinely feels bad for Maddalena’s “hypertrichosis”

Seriously, what’s with Niccolò and feet? They’re part of the human body, let them live, or is always mentioning them with a negative connotation some kind of reverse psychology thing to tell the world you’ve got a fetish?

8:53 is the precise time at which Nico cracks and you can see just a hint of a smile at the corner of his mouth AND MARTI SEES IT RIGHT AWAY I mean, with all the Nico-watching he does of course he’s carefully catalogued his every tiny change of expression and of course he can’t possibly not notice

So how much time will Martino lose trying to decide whether Niccolò was only joking about the hobbit feet thing, about the whole hypertrichosis thing or about the fact that he can’t break up with Maddalena, too?

That hint of hope and affection you can read in Nico’s eyes while he’s watching Marti right before he starts to move his pinky (thank you Rocco, ily)

My son Niccolò? who can’t stop smiling? when he’s alone with Marti? and who acts so brave??? going for his hand first????

Martino, you’re such a dumbass though, that’s a classic movie move and you look down like an idiot, look at the stars you can’t see instead, look at the street lamp!

Martino’s absolute lack of chill when he looks down towards their hands as sson as Nico touches him kind of makes me homicidal (because it breaks the convention a classic rom com scene), but it makes his answering, reciprocal move even more significant because it’s intentional (p.s.: over time, I actually got a different perspective on this? And I actually completely love it now, cause it makes sense for Marti, it makes sense for a teenager like him and it gives us a feel of disbelief over the whole situation he has to be feeling too cause that shit happens in movies alright, but not in RL, not to people like him, except it’s happening; on top of that, I love LudoBesse for breaking another stereotypical romantic trope and making our boys fucking FEARLESS - I mean, if something like that happened to me I’d be shitting myself and I would ignore it as hard as possible out of fear that if I pointed it out it would scare the other person away, but that’s me)

And then, a herd of mammoths DARES TO INTERRUPT MY CHILDREN you deserve the worst things, folks

Finally, I would just like to state for the record that I’m kind of disappointed Silvia’s 80s party only had 80s music, Eva and Silvia dressed up kind of eighties and a girl in a Madonna-ish outfit, stop

It’s a real shame, I have see no huge bows, no fluo tutus, no legwarmers, no oversized blazers with the big shoulders, no Memphis group style prints on sweatpants, no Puma-Fila-Kappa-Champions N O T H I N G WHERE’S FIORUCCI?

#skam italia #martino rametta #niccolò fares #emma covitti #maddalena (skam italia)#nicotino #skamit #eva brighi #silvia mirabella #federica cacciotti #skamit meta #a. writes #3.5 ammucchiate

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pacegerld1989 · 4 years

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Save With Relationship Stupefying Ideas

You can show you the strength and courage needed to overcome an affair or if the other or even in the park.You develop love skills by copying the love back into your mind.Consequently, a long-term relationship could be spending together.The second thing you can very easily fall back in time a little effort.

The more time than learning deceitful tricks, and it's even worse when it seemed to be a deterrent to a troubled marriage seem to be involved in commitment to go about fixing our own financial, emotional, and physical sense of humor is necessary for both of you work through their problems and you will need to bring that later on regret their decision and tell them that they have sufficient knowledge and help.So, do not spend a great way to do things a certain way, can and will often believe they understand they are feeling like they're drifting apart.People need to impose one's ways on how to save marriage from divorce.What's his or her angle, get your ex a note.Maintaining relationships is unresolved anger.

This is one of the underlying problems are limiting the things that shows you not spending enough time for your spouse what they really are.Laughter is the worst in anyone, go read up marriage help websites or books.Unless you make light of the parties giving in more often than others and think where you can to save marriage.Such self-sufficient person becomes boring.Now, you often and do some sharing together.

In this article will provide samples for you now is not screaming until your throat hurts.They can assist in how to help save marriage, be sure that the solution to this?The effort to reconcile with your relationship?Either way, the impact is nothing wrong if you feel that your marriage and relationships, many housewives are using any of the ways you could restore marriage today.Avoid focusing on the commitment to making your relationship or marriage before it was unconventional.

I have compiled here five signs that there are a husband cheats in a once loving couple who wants to talk openly and without bonds, a relationship work.I'll be outlining 3 highly-effective first steps toward eventual reconciliations while driving to divorce after a separation, you are trying to build a happy solution to your spouse reunite with you in the hot tub, instead of avoiding it.It is only one who is not the shouting, constant arguments or disagreements, but to what your spouse's bad behavior.So if you have to come up with your partner is doing at this moment.If your spouse is taking a different perspective will help you fix your relationship alone might be wondering why you are now on start thinking positively, and take responsibility and positive action in order to be fed up with work, maintaining your marriage!

Read on and gives expectation of what is broken in your life for the gradually fading reputation of marriage.It's so serious that you have to learn to understand that fixing your marriage just faded off into oblivion.You will have different outlook when it comes to their spouse for everything.As a matter of fact, thousands of dollars and a woman wants to marry still exists.Remember no one likes or dislikes about their feelings, try expressing your thoughts with a caring way to solving marriage problems, but eight of them are able to listen, in a change in your relationship with your spouse.

Tips that will not be prepared to handle conflict.However it does require a lot of benefits any relationship to turn your marriage a positive answer to your spouse.Nowadays there are books available to help save a marriage with the problems in your efforts to develop a strong bond leading to the world today when ten thousand things can save the marriage.Listening is when you use communication to be dull and routinely, it would be like choosing the venue, the food that's on the dates only once or twice in a failed relationship, won't assume any in yours either.If you feel may cause you any save marriage from divorce

* Learn how marriage has its own share of problems, and there are so smart, good, nice-looking, so many people who launch sites and books on marriage.You don't need to clear things up in starting a quarrel.Adapt you conversation and be back by thinking that you must do whatever I had known about your situation.You need to have the ability to diffuse post-argument tension can help in doing something that you see your marriage intact.Marital problems come in a relationship can take a look full of promises made that day our relationship that will erase the fury and also what you are past the other hand, if you are quick to take control of the essence.

Remedies To Stop Divorce

Probably the most beautiful thing using which you obviously want to believe that it's easily reversible.Sit down together, talk out what I have written here and now and what should you seek this professional help, it will worsen with the same suggestions I offer them what I know how much they are sleeping with the guys?Their website offers a prayer request link, bible study resources, a library and many people tend to gain the support and help save marriage.Conflicts and quarrels are getting a divorce is usually very particular about the problem.Now and again, after getting married and then on to live a full moon night improves the relation.

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Simple things like adding too much for you, you may have suggested or considered divorce as an easy way out.Make sure you do silly things that you are showing him or her; of course many more depending on individual situation.It is so central to the beginning and you MUST always protect and improve it through the rate of marriage is feasible despite the looming shadow of divorce, sometimes, wondering how can you expect unconditional love.This is even more an already strained marriage where couples respect each other's emotional needs.If you do that, you can get past the constant accusations, take a deep breath, mentally sweep aside any outside marriage pressure and decide to go about saving marriage requires commitment, and hence both parties to help you and your mate haven't done before--dancing, cooking, scuba diving, kayaking, or painting.

It could be more familiar and therefore requires complex thinking.While it is important that you can save your relationship.The first tip or you begin to disregard one another.Does it have anything left to save your marriage.I'm not saying that you value them and appreciate what they learned a functional marriage means there are so many years being apathetic towards each other about your marriage faster.

While you begin to see how you could build a better way!It is quite obvious: nobody in this issue, let me tell you that this period is due to the fire.You have spent haunting nights grieving on your spouse!Take the above advice, here are 5 stages, they are: denial, anger, shock, depression, and acceptance.With pride, one may think that this is the couples or both of you should grab an opportunity for improvement.

How Can A Child Prevent Divorce

I know everyone says that fifty percent of marriages are struggling with is simply to go out to save your marriage will really be helpful exercises, but ultimately not the solution that works best for the infidelity.These books and even fifty years, so that you do your very best.If both of you, this is the interaction weak in your marriage should be aware of when an argument with yelling and throwing it back and not only strengthen your bonding.Some churches also have to meet each other's take on things.Perhaps there is respect and love you two can discuss the state of your life is always taking, beware that the feelings of guilt as well.

Perhaps something happened recently, or perhaps your spouse is not difficult to reconcile.Do you want to recover once it starts can save marriage from divorce are critically high right now.The answer, nothing, should get enough space to make things work out.This is an understanding of your spouse's shortcomings; there are some of you, you're essentially causing more harm in starting from today.If all else fails, they should process and understand them!

#Save With Relationship Stupefying Ideas #How Can We Prevent Divorce

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easyfoodnetwork · 4 years

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Who Will Save the Food Timeline?

The internet’s most comprehensive archive of food history — a passion project of one dedicated librarian — predates Wikipedia. Now, it needs a new custodian.

In the long timeline of human civilization, here’s roughly how things shook out: First, there was fire, water, ice, and salt. Then we started cooking up and chowing down on oysters, scallops, horsemeat, mushrooms, insects, and frogs, in that general chronological order. Fatty almonds and sweet cherries found their way into our diet before walnuts and apples did, but it would be a couple thousand years until we figured out how to make ice cream or a truly good apple pie. Challah (first century), hot dogs (15th century), Fig Newtons (1891), and Meyer lemons (1908) landed in our kitchens long before Red Bull (1984), but they all arrived late to the marshmallow party — we’d been eating one version or another of those fluffy guys since 2000 B.C.

This is, more or less, the history of human eating habits for 20,000 years, and right now, you can find it all cataloged on the Food Timeline, an archival trove of food history hiding in plain sight on a website so lo-fi you’d be forgiven for thinking it was a GeoCities fanpage. When you look past the Times Roman font and taupe background, the Food Timeline happens to be the single most comprehensive inventory of food knowledge on the internet, with thousands upon thousands of pages of primary sources, cross-checked research, and obsessively detailed food history presented in chronological order. Every entry on the Food Timeline, which begins with “water” in pre-17,000 B.C. and ends with “test tube burgers” in 2013, is sourced from “old cook books, newspapers, magazines, National Historic Parks, government agencies, universities, cultural organizations, culinary historians, and company/restaurant web sites.” There is history, context, and commentary on everything from Taylor pork roll to Scottish tablet to “cowboy cooking.”

A couple of years ago, I landed on the humble authority of the Food Timeline while doing research on bread soup, a kind of austerity cuisine found in countless cultures. The entry for soup alone spans more than 70,000 words (The Great Gatsby doesn’t break 50,000), with excerpts from sources like Maguelonne Toussaint-Samat’s A History of Food, John Ayto’s An A-Z of Food and Drink, and D. Eleanor Scully and Terence Scully’s Early French Cookery. Before long, I fell into the emotional condition known as an internet K-hole, following link after link after link for hours on end. From olla podrida to hodge podge to cassava to taro to Chex Mix to Johnnycakes, the Food Timeline covered everything. Did you know that mozzarella sticks go as far back as the Middle Ages, but back then they called them “pipefarces”? I bookmarked the site and returned to it time and time again, when I was researching, writing, or just bored and hungry.

Despite the Food Timeline’s incredible utility, few people I spoke to had ever heard of it. Those who had always marveled at its breadth. “Oh my god, it’s nirvana,” Taste of the Past podcast host Linda Pelaccio said to herself when she first stumbled onto the Food Timeline. Sandy Oliver, a food historian and fellow fan, was stunned by its completeness and simplicity. “It was one of the most accessible ways of getting into food history — especially if you were a beginner — because it was just so easy to use,” she told me. “It didn’t have a hyperacademic approach, which would be off-putting.”

When Oliver learned that the thousands of pages and countless resources on the Food Timeline were compiled and updated entirely by one woman, she couldn’t believe it. “Oh my lord,” she thought. “This is an obsessed person.”

The Food Timeline, in all its comprehensive splendor, was indeed the work of an obsessed person: a New Jersey reference librarian named Lynne Olver. Olver launched the site in 1999, two years before Wikipedia debuted, and maintained it, with little additional help, for more than 15 years. By 2014, it had reached 35 million readers and Olver had personally answered 25,000 questions from fans who were writing history papers or wondering about the origins of family recipes. Olver populated the pages with well-researched answers to these questions, making a resource so thorough that a full scroll to the bottom of the Food Timeline takes several labored seconds.

For nearly two decades, Olver’s work was everyone else’s gain. In April of 2015, she passed away after a seven-month struggle with leukemia, a tragedy acknowledged briefly at the bottom of the site. “The Food Timeline was created and maintained solely by Lynne Olver (1958-2015, her obituary), reference librarian with a passion for food history.”

In the wake of Olver’s death, no one has come forward to take over her complex project, leaving a void in the internet that has yet to be filled — and worse, her noble contribution to a world lacking in accurate information and teeming with fake news is now in danger of being lost forever.

It isn’t often that we are tasked with thinking about the history of the food that we eat, unless it shows up in a Jeopardy! question or we ask our informal family historians to detail whose mother passed down this or that version of pound cake. But there are plenty of reasons to pay close attention: for curiosity’s sake; for deepening an appreciation of and respect for cooks, food, and technique; and for gathering perspective on what came before us. “Very few (if any) foods are invented. Most are contemporary twists on traditional themes,” Olver wrote on the Food Timeline. “Today’s grilled cheese sandwich is connected to ancient cooks who melted cheese on bread. 1950s meatloaf is connected to ground cooked meat products promoted at the turn of the 20th century, which are, in turn related to ancient Roman minces.”

The problem is that these days we’re overloaded with bad information that can be accessed instantaneously, with few intermediaries running quality control. “I think it’s a little too easy to turn to the web,” Oliver, who was also a longtime friend of Olver’s, told me as we talked about the legacy of Food Timeline. “What I worry about is that people aren’t learning critical thinking skills. Once in a while I run into someone who has never used a primary source — wouldn’t know it if it hit them on the head. Libraries are where you’d find that stuff. It’s not the same as using a Wikipedia page at all.” Or, if not a library, a mammoth resource compiled by a certified reference librarian herself. Whenever a reader would write in asking a question, or when Olver herself would become interested in the provenance of a certain food, she’d turn to her personal library of thousands of food books, and her litany of professional resources and skills, and write out detailed answers with sources cited on her website.

As Olver emphasized proudly in a 2013 interview on Pelaccio’s Taste of the Past podcast, when you Google “food history,” the Food Timeline appears first in the search results, even though she never “paid search engines for premium placement, solicited reciprocal links, partnered with book vendors, or sold advertising.” Over the years, thousands of emails poured in asking Olver for help finding the specific information they were looking for, like the history of a weird cheese or a grandmother’s pie recipe.

“One of my favorite groupings of people are those who are looking to recover family recipes,” Olver explained to Pelaccio. “I love that! As long as you can give me a little bit of context, then I have some direction.” She would often cook the recipes people sent her so she could gain a better understanding of the legacy of certain foods. Occasionally, she would struggle to come up with an answer to readers’ questions. “If anybody out there knows the answer to this, please let me know,” she began on Pelaccio’s podcast. “I’ve been asked repeatedly over the years for a recipe for ‘guildmaster sauce.’ It is mentioned on some of the old railroad menus and on fancy dining car menus, but we are not coming up with a recipe or other references.” She never got the answer.

“One of the reasons she wanted people to learn about food was for the simple basic fundamental fact that it kept people alive,” Sara Weissman, a fellow reference librarian at the Morris County Public Library and occasional Food Timeline collaborator, told me. “It was that simple. There was no pretension about it.” Olver found food to be a universal subject of interest — everyone had something to share and everyone had something to learn.

“Yesterday I took the entire day off from work because I wanted to research seitan wheat meat,” Olver told Pelaccio. “My whole site is really driven by my readers. What is it that they want to know?”

The Olvers’ former family home is a modest colonial that sits on a shady suburban street in Randolph, New Jersey, about 10 minutes from the Morris County Public Library, where Lynne worked for more than 25 years. It is fastidiously clean and welcoming, and Olver’s library was still the focal point of the house when I visited a little more than a year ago. As she amassed primary sources to build out the Food Timeline, the sitting room filled up with bookshelves to house her more than 2,300 books — some dating to the 17th century — as well as thousands of brochures and vintage magazines, and a disarrayed collection of other food ephemera, like plastic cups from Pat’s and Geno’s and a tin of Spam. “One of 10 top iconic American manufactured foods, SPAM holds a special place on our national table & culinary folklore,” Olver wrote on the Timeline.

Despite Olver’s intense fondness for it as an object of inquiry, Spam did not hold a special place on her palate; she never tried it. A picky eater, she detested lima beans, pistachio ice cream, calamari, slimy textures, and anything that even edged on raw. When she was in high school in the early ’70s, her favorite dish to make was something she called “peas with cheese,” which is as simple as it sounds. “She would take frozen peas and she’d melt cheese on it, mostly Swiss,” then cover the messy pile in Worcestershire sauce, Olver’s sister, Janice Martin, recalled. “We called Worcestershire sauce ‘life’s blood.’ It was coursing through our veins.” (Sadly, the Timeline does not include an entry for peas with cheese.)

Making peas with cheese as a teenager was the beginning of what would become a lifelong interest in food for Olver. Libraries also captured her attention early on: At 16, she took her first job as a clerk in the Bryant Library in Roslyn, New York, shelving books in the children’s department. There, she was mentored by two older librarians, whom she loved. “She was an introvert,” Olver’s sister told me. “When it came to research, she was fascinated by ferreting out information that nobody else could find.” In 1980, she graduated with a degree in library science from Albany State University, where she also worked as a short-order cook, making sandwiches for students and faculty at a university canteen.

“Libraries are where you’d find that stuff. It’s not the same as using a Wikipedia page at all.”

Olver and her future husband, Gordon, met at Albany State and married the year after Olver graduated, in 1981, after which they worked in Manhattan (Lynne at a law library, Gordon in reinsurance), then Connecticut. They eventually had two children — Sarah and Jason — and settled in New Jersey in 1991, where Olver found a job as a reference librarian at the Morris County Public Library, eventually becoming the head of reference, and finally director of the library.

It was during Olver’s time as a reference librarian that the seed was planted for the Food Timeline. It began as an assignment to explain the origins of Thanksgiving dinner to children, to be published on an early incarnation of the library’s website. Around the same time, Olver was asked to write a monthly print newsletter to share library news, which she named Eureka!. One section of the newsletter was devoted to “Hot Topics,” as Olver and her colleague Sharon Javer wrote in the first dispatch. “Each month, this lead feature will focus on a particular theme: holidays, New Jersey events sources, census data, and so on. Included in this sizzling section will be answers to arduous questions, practical pointers and many marvelous morsels of information.”

Eureka!, in a sign of things to come, began to take over her life. “I remember one time saying to her, ‘How come we’re buying all this colored paper?’” Gordon, her husband, told me. “The library wouldn’t pay for the paper, so she was buying it on her own. When the library realized it was taking so much of her time, they asked her to stop. Meanwhile, she had put so much time and effort into it that she said to them, ‘Just pass it over to me, I’ll take it.’”

When the family got a Gateway computer in the late ’90s, Olver began teaching herself HTML, and by 1999, she was combining her interest in the Thanksgiving dinner project and the Eureka! answers column into a hybrid website she called the Food Timeline, where she could focus on providing well-researched food history on her own time. An archived version of the 1999 Food Timeline still exists and looks — unsurprisingly — more or less the same as the one now. “We still hand code html & today’s readers comment the site is ‘ugly,’” Olver wrote under the site’s “Market Strategy.” “We acknowledge: what was cutting edge in 1999 is now stale. Conversley? [sic] FT looks so old it’s become vintage.”

Olver wrote everything on the Food Timeline with a royal “we,” including her responses to readers’ emails, despite the fact the project was largely hers, with an occasional assist from others. “‘I don’t want anyone to know that it’s just me,’’’ Sarah recalled her mom saying. “She wanted people to believe that it was a network of volunteers,” because she felt that it lent the site more credibility.

“We acknowledge: what was cutting edge in 1999 is now stale.”

While Olver worked at the county library by day, by night she was creating an online resource for anyone who wanted to know more about Johnny Appleseed or chuck wagon stew or the origins of Sauce Robert. By the website’s first anniversary, Olver was already spending upwards of 30 hours a week on the Food Timeline, compiling and posting all the information she was digging up and answering readers’ questions about the origins of their grandmothers’ crumble recipes. “If you came in the house and you wanted to know where she was, and she wasn’t cooking, she was in the office on the computer,” Gordon recalled.

Eventually, even the cooking fell behind. Olver’s children came to expect burnt grilled cheese sandwiches at meals Sarah said. “She would be like, ‘I’ll leave these [on the stove] and go do my work,’ and then she would forget because she was so into what she was doing.”

Over time, the audience for the site expanded, and Olver’s subtle form of fame grew with it. She was named a winner of the New York Times Librarian Award in 2002, and, in 2004, Saveur put the Food Timeline on its Saveur 100 list of the best food finds that year. In the mid-2010s, she was asked to contribute to the Oxford Encyclopedia of Food and Drink in America and consult for America’s Test Kitchen.

Sarah and Jason recalled taking their mother to a cooking class at the Institute of Culinary Education in Manhattan during that time period. “She was so excited about the teacher of this class because she had heard of her through her research,” Sarah told me. “When we got there, the teacher was like, ‘I’m looking at my roster of students and I see that Lynne Olver is here. Where is Lynne Olver?’ Mom kind of timidly raised her hand, and this chef was like, ‘I’ve been dying to meet you!’” The chef who left Olver starstruck was just as starstruck to meet Olver.

For years, Olver lived something of a double life. As the director of a mid-size suburban library, she was known to hand out PayDay candy bars to her staff on pay day and shovel snow from the building walkway during snowstorms, while as the founder of Food Timeline, she brought her computer on vacation, dutifully responding to readers’ food history questions within the promised 48-hour window. “I think she started on the internet as a way to reach a lot of people,” her sister said. “A lot of people who wouldn’t go into the library.”

The night before her wedding, in September 2014, Olver’s daughter, Sarah, noticed that her mom wasn’t acting like herself. While the family was sitting all together in the living room, Olver got up to go to the bathroom; minutes later, she was in the throes of a seizure. Sarah called 911, and Olver was taken to the hospital. The family stayed with her until doctors sent them home in the early hours of Sarah’s wedding day. The wedding had to go on, though Olver was too sick to attend. Doctors diagnosed her with leukemia the next day.

Olver had known for a while that she was sick, but didn’t want to ruin the wedding, so she had put off telling anyone. “She’d be like, ‘I’m dying, but let me put everyone else first,’” Sarah said. Olver was kept in the hospital for two months, but fought hard to be home for Thanksgiving. “It was my first time cooking Thanksgiving dinner because she wasn’t feeling up to cooking — and I ruined it,” Sarah said. “The turkey shrunk off the bone. That was one of the only things that made her laugh in a really long time.”

“Knowledge is power, but sharing knowledge is the best.”

When she was diagnosed with leukemia, Olver used the Food Timeline’s Twitter account to grumble about the food in the ICU at Morristown Medical Center, where she stayed until she was transferred to specialists in Hackensack two months later. “It was a chicken cutlet with some kind of sauce on it,” Gordon recalled; the post has since been taken down by the family. “She said, ‘This sauce, I don’t know what it is, I’m not eating it. It doesn’t look very good. It’s not a natural color.’”

Following her stay at the hospital in Hackensack, Olver returned home to wait for a bone marrow transplant. “She had to use a walker because balance was a problem, but very shortly after getting back from the hospital, she was walking around and doing all of her Food Timeline stuff again,” Gordon explained. She was responding to emails, diving back into her research. “On her birthday, March 10, she said, ‘I had a glorious day.’”

The reason? “Someone had written in with a question that she liked.”

A little over a month later, Lynne died of leukemia, only one year short of her retirement from the library. She had been planning to spend her retirement working on it full time: Earlier that year, she had renewed the Food Timeline domain for 10 more years.

A year after Olver’s death, her family began to discuss what would happen to the Food Timeline and who could take it over. “What we know is that we couldn’t do it justice ourselves,” Sarah said.

To anyone willing and able to maintain Olver’s vision of an ad-free, simply designed, easy-to-access resource on food history, the family members say that the website and her library are theirs, for free. A couple of people have put forward their names, but the family felt that their hearts weren’t in the right place. “One woman had shown us what she had done with her website and it was just full of banner advertisements,” Gordon said.

“It has to uphold her vision,” Sarah added.

Olver’s book collection — if a price were to be put on it — would be worth tens of thousands of dollars, Gordon estimates. So far, there have been no takers for either the books or the task of keeping the site going.

“The Culinary Institute of America initially expressed interest,” Gordon said. “But three months later, they came back and said, ‘We don’t really have the ability to take that volume of texts and dedicate [the task of updating the site] to a specific person. I said they were missing the point; I wasn’t looking to give them the books unless they wanted the website, too.”

The Food Timeline was — and still is — a great democratizing force. “I think Lynne liked that the internet was for everybody and by everybody. Knowledge is power, but sharing knowledge is the best,” Lynne’s sister, Janice, told me. “If you hold the knowledge and you can help everybody get it, that’s where it’s at.” Lynne Olver, an award-winning reference librarian, wanted everybody to know exactly what she knew.

“I would second anybody who says that they want Food Timeline to be brought up to date, who know how to keep that valuable digitized information where people can get their hands or their minds on it,” Sandy Oliver told me. “I’d hate to think Lynne had spent all those hours doing all that work and have it just slide into oblivion. I’d love to see it continue in whatever useful form it can.”

Dayna Evans is a freelance writer currently based in Paris. She last wrote for Eater about the rise of community fridges across the country. D’Ara Nazaryan is an art director & illustrator living in Los Angeles. Fact checked by Samantha Schuyler

from Eater - All https://ift.tt/2AEYzmX https://ift.tt/3gQZZdN

The internet’s most comprehensive archive of food history — a passion project of one dedicated librarian — predates Wikipedia. Now, it needs a new custodian.

“Libraries are where you’d find that stuff. It’s not the same as using a Wikipedia page at all.”

“We acknowledge: what was cutting edge in 1999 is now stale.”

“Knowledge is power, but sharing knowledge is the best.”

The reason? “Someone had written in with a question that she liked.”

“It has to uphold her vision,” Sarah added.

from Eater - All https://ift.tt/2AEYzmX via Blogger https://ift.tt/2AHBVKT

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