#But I can't help but wonder if it would be painful to spend time with this sad lonely magicless man - and how guilty that would make Simon
Note
I know you've already done something similar, but I'm wondering if you can write a billie, delia, and mina fic with reader who gets attacked and ends up forgetting things like who her gfs are and where she is? Maybe you can add your own ideas to it if ur up to it? Thank you <33
Cordelia Goode x Wilhemina Venable x Billie Dean Howard x Reader- Closure
A/N: Hi there ❣️ I apologise for the delay with this on. I have been a bit sick and busy. This is really long but I couldn't make it any shorter.
tw: mention of blood, mention of doctors and hospitals, mention of amnesia, cursing, smoking, lots of angst
word count: 11k 😅
taglist:
@lunaticwhittaker, @billiebeanhoward, @lanawinters-ily, @kenzbro, @minaslittleone, @httpfiftyshadesofgay, @whitelotus00, @ninaahs, @vintagepaulson, @isle-of-earle, @paulsonsratched, @stepintomyworld, @grilledcheeseandguavajelly, @lucyintheskywithxanax, @fanfics4world, @mymiraclewitch, @hazard-to-myself, @awritersometime, @ohrwurm26, @wastdstime
It had been a normal day at the academy, a busy weekday really, the four of you going on about your days, Cordelia mostly in her office working on academy business, Wilhemina at work and returning a little while ago, you mostly teaching classes and spending your afternoon in the greenhouse, Billie equally at work. At last, you find yourself in the comfort of your girlfriends arms, the four of you snuggled up together by the fireplace, the tv running softly in the background, drawing out the outside noises from the busy streets, some laughter still coming from some of the witches rooms.
As you glance around you, you notice Delia sitting beside you, holding you closely as the two of you are snuggled in a blanket, Wilhemina sitting in her armchair, doing some knitting, her eyes occasionally glancing at you three, the view warming her heart and causing the ever so smallest smile to coat her features. A sudden movement startles you a little, Billie Dean disappearing into the darkness of the night again as she leaves for a smoke, this time unannounced and you can't help but notice how this must have been her third cigarette within twenty minutes, and equally Cordelia watches her leave, Wilhemina's brows furrowing as usually she announced her little smoking breaks.
And as you think about it a little further, you remember how agitated Billie seemed today, unusually quiet at dinner and not sharing any details about her day, like she usually would. And then it kinda dawns on you how fidgety she had been, how she had barely said any words and the revelation causes you to jolt in Cordelia's arms. Her brown eyes meet yours, concern washing over her, before she speaks softly ,,Sweetheart, are you okay?'' she asks, almost a little confused, noticing how tense you suddenly seem. ,,I'm worried about Billie'' you announce, ignoring the voice in your head telling you not to share your concern with them, not wanting to worry them in the process. Cordelia remains silent as she glances at Wilhemina, and as their eyes lock they share a silent understanding. Despite Cordelia being the supreme, you had an odd connection with the three women, somehow always noticing whenever something was wrong.
Cordelia had tried to solve that puzzle many times, whether it was simply your intuition, whether it was simply the love you share for them and how observant you are. However she had questioned how you almost always seem to get it right, always instantly by Wilhemina's side as your senses alerted you of her pains, always by Cordelia's side whenever some danger was looming over the usual safe walls of the academy, sometimes knowing before she did. And you often knew when something was bothering the medium too, when everything was getting a little much for her. And despite never solving the puzzle regarding your senses, she knows that you must be right, also having noticed how agitated, nervous and quiet Billie had been all evening.
And before too long, the medium returns, opting for the other armchair, despite her sitting beside Cordelia moments before, her loud mind causing her to not be focused, to forget already. ,,Billie honey?'' Cordelia tries softly, drawing the medium away from her thoughts. ,,Is everything okay darling?'' she tries, tilting her head a little as three sets of concerned eyes meet the mediums. And she hesitates then, playing with her acrylic nails as a nervous habit, her mouth opening before she physically stops herself, biting the words back. ,,Billie?'' Wilhemina tries now as concern washes over her as well, never having seen Billie like this despite the many battles the medium had thought over the years, including battles with the redhead but always coming out stronger in the end.
,,It's- it's nothing'' Billie tries but her attempt is pathetic as tears already swell in her eyes, Cordelia quick on her feet to kneel beside the medium, taking her shaking hands into her steady ones. ,,Darling, please, what is it?'' the supreme tries, her eyes pleading with her, grounding her and giving her safety to share whatever this was. ,,It's work'' she finally admits, sighing in the process as she lets a tear stream down her cheek. And as you glance at Wilhemina, your features filled with pain, you both know this was serious. Billie never spoke too much about her work, only the nice parts really, including the promo tours, the fun bits of it, never the hauntings, never the ghosts. The same hauntings, ghosts and spirits that often kept her awake at night, causing her to have terrible nightmares, and the three of you often shushing her back to sleep in the end.
,,It's really bad'' she admits, more to herself than either of you and Wilhemina slowly abandons her knitting supplies, you equally abandoning your spot on the comfortable sofa, before walking over to your girlfriend and placing the same blanket that had provided you warmth and safety to her now. ,,Tell us honey'' Cordelia instructs before Billie begins slowly filling you in. Telling you three about her worst gig yet, how despite having seen everything by now she couldn't crack this one, how there was some connection to witches. How she assumes they are satanic witches who are trapped here and haunting a family, how she has been scared to go to work for the past few days, as all her methods failed. You glance at Cordelia when she mentions witches, wondering whether maybe you and the supreme could help out all things considered.
,,It's okay honey, come here'' Cordelia softly offers as soon as Billie finishes, pulling the medium into her arms as your hands softly reach out to hold the mediums, rubbing your thumb in little circles to keep her feeling safe and sound. ,,Billie?'' Wilhemina tries after a while, after the medium had mostly calmed down. ,,Are you gonna make fun of me?'' Billie chuckles through tears, not used to let her guard down like this, especially around all of you at the same time. Wilhemina's features soften then, almost frowning ,,Of course not'' she speaks calmly ,,We are here for you'' she speaks again and it almost causes for you to cry, knowing your Mina had a hard time with these sort of things.
,,Delia?'' you ask, getting her attention as she glances at you ,,I'm sure we can help'' you urge, pleading with her through your eyes. The supreme hesitates, knowing it was probably possible her being the supreme and also having the gift of mediumship that comes with her powers but knowing this was dangerous, after all if Billie was correct and if they truly had some satanic connections. As she glances around the room, she catches a glimpse of Billie who's eyes plead in desperation and so the blonde can't help but agreeing. ,,Can you take me there tomorrow?'' Cordelia asks and is met with a gasp of relief from the medium, who nods her head gratefully. ,,How about we get you to bed for now honey?'' Cordelia tries and Billie simply nods, before the four of you ascend the stairs, getting ready for your individual evening routines and eventually finding each other in bed.
That night you don't manage to get a lot of sleep, worried about your lover who tossed and turned a lot, awoken by a nightmare a couple of times but the three of you were quick by her side, holding her gently through the terrors of the night. And eventually, you give up on the idea of sleep, softly extracting from bed and wrapping a blanket around you before hiding away in the comfort of the greenhouse, glancing through some of Cordelia's books, hoping you could find something that could help out. After countless hours, the sun already rising a while ago, you are lost in several books about satanic rituals, witches and their history, quite taken back as you hadn't really learned about this type of magic before.
Cordelia eventually finds you, watching from the door where she lingers, softly smiling at you sitting crossed leg on the floor, several books around you. ,,Sweetie?'' she startles you, causing you to jolt a little. And then as you watch her approach, looking ethereal as ever in one of her flower dresses, it dawns on you, how long you had been gone, how tired you are from the lack of sleep. ,,What are you up to in here?'' she asks, glancing at the books. ,,Just some reading'' you explain yourself, quickly up on your feet before she presses a soft kiss to your lips, noticing the little bags under your eyes and guessing you- alike her, didn't get too much sleep the night prior.
Taking her hand, you follow her inside the academy again, the witches already having begun their days, going on about their tasks, as you find both Billie and Wilhemina in the kitchen, already dressed for the day while you stand there still in your pyjamas, blanket wrapped around your shoulders. ,,Where are you going?'' you ask a little confused, noticing they are all dressed to go somewhere, Wilhemina's car keys dangling from her hand. ,,We are going with Billie sweetheart'' Cordelia softly announces, her features a little tense as she knows the argument that is about to follow. ,,Wait- give me five minutes'' you announce, getting ready to sprint upstairs but Cordelia stops you. ,,Sweetie'' she tries and by the hint of guilt in her eyes you know she doesn't want you to go.
,,I need you to stay here sweetie'' she tries but you are quick to shake your head. ,,No way'' you announce, pleading with both Billie and Wilhemina, hoping they are easier to convince at times. ,,Darling it's far too dangerous'' Cordelia explains, her features stern. ,,No Delia I don't care, I'm not letting you three go alone'' you protest before Wilhemina steps forward. ,,Little one'' she tries but you are having none of it, matching the redheads usual stubbornness. ,,Why are you going but not me?'' you question and as you glance at Billie's and Cordelia's face it suddenly dawns on you. How they always seemed to coddle you, treat you like a child as if you aren't worthy of this, not worthy of adult things, of dangerous things despite being a witch and knowing how to protect yourself. ,,Please sweetie, I need you to look after the girls and coven'' Cordelia pleads and you have always had a hard time to deny her or them of anything and so slowly you cave in.
,,We will be right back, promise babydoll'' Billie announces, pressing a kiss to your cheeks. ,,Please be safe'' you beg, before Cordelia hugs you from the side, pulling you into her arms and pressing a kiss to your cheeks. ,,Promise little one'' Wilhemina announces with a smile before you watch the three of them leave. You glance around the kitchen, noticing how you must have missed breakfast and so you opt for getting ready for your day, afterwards checking the schedule for today and how neither you nor Cordelia are due for teaching today. And so the only thing you can do is pace around Cordelia's office, hating the fact that you didn't insist on going, how the three of them could be in danger, trusting both the supreme and mediums gift with all of your heart and knowing Wilhemina was tough but after everything you had read last night, thoughts of panic and concern still crash through you, causing you to hyperventilate a little.
Meanwhile, your girlfriends had made it to the house, Wilhemina had promised to stay outside, the only way Cordelia would agree on letting her drive them. And as soon as the supreme steps foot in the house, none of Billie's crew present as they insisted on investigating this without cameras, she can sense the lost and trapped dangerous spirits. ,,Follow me'' Billie tries, leading the supreme up the stairs and to the room where she had set up several of her failed methods. Cordelia's head begins pounding and aching with their screams as they must sense that a witch had entered the house, among her ranks despite a very different form of magic. As the medium enters one of the rooms, Cordelia inspects carefully, her hands hovering nearby the walls, trying to see if there was anything she could do, a spell she could cast or trying to figure out what the spirits may want and need to move on.
What all of them are unaware of though, is that the lost souls had no intention of moving on, of stopping the haunting of the poor family who had recently moved in. All they wanted was revenge, revenge for the way they had tragically been killed, despite that being by neither of the people affected by their hauntings. As Cordelia glances around, she feels a wave of discomfort course through her veins, their screams causing for her head to ache further, Billie equally shaking with their torture. And just like they intended, they managed to get into your girlfriends heads, using their magic to cause the only thing they had meant to do, cause agony and pain upon the innocent.
And as you continue pacing, you suddenly feel like losing your balance, your ears ringing as you hear an agonising scream, and it wasn't just any scream, it was Billie, the medium screaming for help and as your eyes widen, you are quick to force them shut, using your magic abilities to teleport to your girlfriends, panic rippling through your body. Wilhemina's eyes widen as you suddenly appear in front of her, your face filled with fear and panic. ,,Little one?'' she tries ,,Where is she?'' your shaky voice ripples through the air. ,,I heard Billie scream'' you announce, before brushing past her, quickly entering the house. ,,Y/N wait'' Wilhemina tries, confusion washing over her features.
Wilhemina watches as you try to ascend the stairs, taking a few steps before an invisible force takes over, causing you to fly up and down the stairs, as your body floats at first, Wilhemina's heart stopping in her chest. And then it all stops as your scared eyes meet the redheads before you are thrown across the room, the spirits enjoying their little game. A loud bang startles both Cordelia and Billie who are unaware of what had unfolded, their eyes meeting for a second before they run downstairs, finding you in front of Wilhemina on the floor, her expression filled with panic.
,,Y/N'' Billie shouts, seeing your lifeless body on the floor ,,What happened?'' Cordelia asks, glancing at Wilhemina who remains frozen, before she kneels down, taking your head into her hands, her hands quickly staining with blood. ,,She suddenly appeared and said she heard you scream Billie'' Wilhemina explains. Billie's eyes widen in shock ,,I didn't scream...Cordelia it's the spirits, we need to get out of here'' she ushers and the supreme is quick to agree.
The blonde is quick to take you into her arms, before running towards the car, putting you in the back seat before taking a seat and holding you in her arms. Wilhemina rushes to the drivers seat, Billie beside her before she starts the car. The supreme is quick to cast a few spells, trying to stop the bleeding, trying to heal you but she quickly notices that it must be more serious than this, considering her efforts are not working as the blood still poured and the colour fades more and more from your features with each passing moment. ,,We need to get her to a hospital now'' she ushers, Billie hysterically crying in the front, glancing at you and blaming herself for ever bringing her girlfriends there in the first place.
Wilhemina's determination quickly kicks in as she drives faster, focused to get you to the nearest hospital as quickly as possible. ,,Sweetie'' Cordelia tries, brushing her blood stained hands against your cheeks. ,,Y/N'' she ushers but you can't respond as the battle of unconsciousness had won a long time ago. Tears mingle in each of their eyes, Wilhemina glancing in the mirror as panic sets in, seeing you like this. Within minutes, the redhead has you in front of the nearest hospital, having ushered Billie to call ahead and as Cordelia exits the car, still holding your lifeless body in her hands, there are already some doctors and nurses waiting for you, quickly transporting you onto a gurney and rushing you inside.
The wait feels like an eternity, a lifetime of pain and memories, as the three of them pace back and forth in one of the waiting rooms where one of the nurses had escorted them to. Billie sits curled up in one of the chairs, occasionally pacing around as tears blurry her vision. Wilhemina remains standing, despite the sprain on her back, not caring about her back as all she could think about was you, Cordelia pacing back and forth, her thoughts clouded by the possibility of losing you. And as time passes on, you linger on their mind as the doctors work their magic on fixing your injuries. Cordelia keeps thinking over and over when you first joined the academy, how captivated she had been by you, at last a witch who was experienced, who she barely needed to teach anymore. How she often found you in the greenhouse as it had become your sanctuary, how sweet and polite you had been, often asking if you could borrow some of her books, how she had taught you potions a few times as that wasn't your strong suits.
She thinks back of introducing you to the other two, how your eyes sparkled, more with each moment you spent with them. How slowly you captivated all their hearts, despite Billie unsure about another person but quickly falling for her babydoll. The medium can't help feeling guilty, how she should have never told you, thinking back to all the times she had held you in her arms, how lately she hadn't done that enough, how she hadn't spoiled you in so long as her work had left her in a daze. And Wilhemina can't help but blame herself for how she didn't stop you when you walked in, regretting not having held you or kissed you before they had left. Thinking back to all of those nights where neither of you could sleep, either you finding her in the library or her finding you reading in the greenhouse, how the two of you would often read to each other, lulling each other to sleep as she would hold you close, thinking about how you truly opened up her heart.
,,How is she?'' Cordelia's voice rings through the air as she sees one of the doctors appear, startling the other two in the process and causing for the thoughts and memories to stop for a moment. ,,She's stable'' he explains, three gasps of relief echoing through the quiet room. ,,She just needed some stitches, we assume the shock and impact caused her to lose consciousness'' he carries on explaining. ,,We are just waiting for some scans but if it stays like that, she should be observed for a few days and then good to return home'' he announces before excusing himself again to finish his tests. ,,Thank you so much'' Cordelia whispers, tears lingering in their eyes, tears of relief.
,,Thank god'' Wilhemina announces, the other two meeting her brown eyes. ,,I'm so sorry'' Billie suddenly cries, startling the two, before she breaks down. ,,I should have never said anything, taken you there'' she apologises, feeling terrible as the thought of losing you causes her to lose her balance. Cordelia is quick to guide her to a nearby chair, taking her tear stained cheeks into her soft hands ,,Honey.. Honey it's okay, she's fine'' the supreme coos, Wilhemina taking a deep breath, having a hard time seeing any of her girlfriends like this. ,,We will be just fine'' Cordelia reassures, trying to coax the medium out of her state.
It takes another while, before one of the nurses guides them to a room, where you lay, asleep from the effects the drugs had on your body. ,,The scans confirm no damage'' one of the doctors returns, causing them to again gasp in relief. ,,I suggest keeping her for monitoring but she should be just fine'' he announces. Wilhemina steps forward, glancing at both Cordelia and Billie before speaking ,,Can we take her home?'' she asks, more her girlfriends than the doctor really. ,,She hates hospitals and if it's simply a matter of observing her, we can do just that'' she tries, noticing how you aren't attached to any machines anymore, how you are simply asleep, how you simply had stitches and no surgery that required any further actions.
Cordelia glances at Billie before she glances at the doctor and nurse, a little unsure whether that would be the best idea. ,,If that's what you would prefer, we are happy to provide you with some pain medication for her once she wakes, and if you have any concern or questions you can of course call or come back anytime'' he assures and that's all the confirmation your girlfriends need. As Wilhemina settles the details with the nurses, the doctor approaches you, as you finally open your eyes. ,,How are you feeling Miss?'' he questions and you struggle a little at first, with the bright sensation and the lingering pain but you quickly adapt to your surroundings ,,Fine, a little sore'' you admit and he nods in understanding before releasing you.
,,I'm so glad you are awake sweetie'' Cordelia smiles at you softly, having made a plan with Billie and Wilhemina to distract the nurses for a moment while getting your release papers and medications so she could teleport you back into the coven, figuring that may be easier given the circumstances. And with a swift motion she has you back where you belong, inside your shared bedroom, ushering you to bed before sleep washes over you again. While the supreme watches over your sleeping form, she worries whether bringing you home was the best idea, despite the events she knows your injuries don't seem serious and she also knows how hard it was for your other two girlfriends to constantly be around hospitals and doctors, given Wilhemina's trauma from those and the spirits in the hospital, making it hard for the medium and Cordelia equally. While awaiting for the other twos return, she tries calming herself, knowing that the three of them could certainly provide the best care for you.
Both Billie and Mina return within the next while, Cordelia sitting by your side, watching your chest rise and fall softly, not for once leaving your side. And when they both return, their faces soften seeing you asleep safe and sound. ,,How is she?'' Billie asks before walking over to Cordelia, her features still filled with guilt for what had happened. ,,Fine darling, she's just been sleeping'' the supreme reassures, before the three of them just take a moment to breathe after the dramatic turn of events from today. In the end they opt for taking turns, Cordelia the first one to leave for a while in order to look after the coven for a while and check on the girls, giving some of her classes for tomorrow to Zoe, so she could look after you. Next, Wilhemina retreats for a little, opting for a bath and change of clothes after the events from today, Billie the last one to shower and get changed before returning.
It's late afternoon when you awaken next, your eyes slowly opening after hearing some hushed voices, the bright sensation from the white room causing you to squint them shut, the remaining pain in your heard still lingering. After trying again, your throat feels on fire a little as you try glancing around the room. Billie is by your side straight away, smiling at you, almost beaming a little to finally see you awake. ,,How are you feeling?'' she asks, her voice ringing through the air causing your head to pound a little. ,,Wa'' you try to speak but the pain overwhelms you for a second as you force your eyes to close again. ,,May I have some water please?'' you try again, the request coming out quiet and broken.
,,Of course babydoll'' Billie ushers, reaching for the glass of water by your beside that Cordelia had placed there a while ago. The supreme by the other side of the bed, smiling at you, Wilhemina sitting a few steps away from you in an armchair. The sip of water feels like relief as it cools down the burning sensation in your throat. ,,Thank you nurse'' you speak again after handing her back the glass with shaky hands. Billie raises her eyebrow, chuckling to herself as she sets the glass back down. ,,Is there anything else I can get for my favourite patient?'' she chuckles again, Cordelias features soft and a smirk tugging at Wilhemina's lips as they enjoy your little joke.
,,No thank you'' you reply politely before turning to the other woman sitting beside you ,,What's the prognosis then doctor?'' you ask, assuming that the other blonde must be your doctor. ,,Yes Doctor, what's the prognosis?'' Wilhemina mockingly jokes, giving you a little wink, still assuming you are joking. ,,You will be just fine sweetheart'' she states, her hand brushing over your arm and rubbing little circles on it in a comforting matter, causing for your eyebrows to furrow a little. ,,But when can I leave?'' you ask, mistaking your bedroom for a hospital room as everything is still a little blurry and there is a lot of white.
,,What do you mean sweetie?'' Cordelia asks confused, scanning your features before Wilhemina is already up on her feet, noticing how this wasn't a joke, how this had never been a joke, her expression deadly serious as she approaches. ,,Little one, this isn't funny'' she urges, her features stern, causing you to feel even more confused. ,,Do you know where you are?'' Billie asks, her eyes already brimming with tears. You reluctantly look at the blonde woman who you assume to be your doctor before she speaks again ,,Do you know what happened?''. You try to think for a moment, remembering a man talking to you before in a room that looked quite different now that you are thinking about it. ,,Do you know your name?'' the woman asks again, causing one of the other two to scoff at the ridiculousness of her question. And then it kinda dawns on you how you aren't aware of anything really, you didn't know where you are, what happened or who you are, as if your memories had been wiped completely.
,,No'' you whisper, and by your statement you can tell that those people aren't doctors or nurses as their reactions felt way more personal than that. Wilhemina's eyes force close as she takes a shaky breath, her heart beating fast and aching with pain. Billie's face is stained with tears as they keep pouring, her hand still holding onto yours, squeezing it a little tighter as if she wanted to comfort you, despite you feeling the strange urge to comfort her, despite not knowing her. Cordelia's face is filled with panic, realising the extent of the situation. ,,Wilhemina, we need to call the doctor straight away'' she announces, knowing that Billie wasn't going to be able to think straight at the moment. ,,On it'' the woman with red hair announces before she leaves the room, an unfamiliar sound echoing through the room.
,,It's going to be okay sweetheart'' Cordelia whispers, her own tears streaming down her features, shocked and in disbelief this happened but still hoping they can fix this, that maybe they had made a simple mistakes with your scans, that maybe she could even fix it with her magic. The redhead woman quickly returns, telling them how the doctor was on the way and seeing their faces and feeling utter confusion, you can't help but ask. ,,Who- who are you?'' you whisper, glancing between the three of them and your words hit them like a tidal wave, as you watch their reaction. The crying blonde one sobbing, squeezing your hand a little tighter, the other comforting blonde one furrowing her brows as her eyes search yours, the redhead one's heart literally breaking in front of you, despite her features seeming angry.
,,Darling, this is Billie, that's Wilhemina and I'm Cordelia'' she explains, as she glances between them. ,,Your name is Y/N'' she explains, her heart heavy with pain and worry. ,,You had an accident and I assume you are suffering from amnesia but one of the best doctors we know is on the way and we will fix this'' she explains, bringing at least some light into the darkness in your brain as you repeat their and your own name in your mind, wanting to remember that much. However your eyebrows furrow with confusion again when they still didn't answer who they are to you. ,,But who are you?'' you ask again, knowing this was causing them pain but needing to understand. The three women simply look at each other, unsure how to explain this to you especially considering the circumstances and so noticing her girlfriends reactions, Cordelia speaks again, her usually the one taking over in tough situations.
,,We are your partners Y/N, your girlfriends'' she speaks, her eyes almost pleading with you to remember. ,,What all three?'' you blurt out, causing Billie to chuckle a little, despite the pain. ,,Yes sweetie'' Cordelia nods, before a little smirk creeps its way onto your features ,,Well I certainly must have a type huh?'' you question more to yourself than them really, causing Wilhemina to chuckle lowly. ,,Well at least you still have your sense of humour little one'' she chuckles, hoping to bring some light into the situation, Cordelia and Billie smiling warmly, despite their hearts heavy with pain and faces filled with concern.
The next while is certainly uncomfortable, the four of you sitting in silence before Wilhemina guides the doctor into the room, thanking her for coming over so quickly. Unbeknownst to you, the woman was Billie's close friends, one of her celebrity acquaintances, who eventually also became Wilhemina's doctor. She was familiar with the academy and witchcraft and so it seemed more fitting. Cordelia had showed her the scans and reports from the hospital before, doing it in a private matter because she didn't want to overwhelm you. You had slipped into a little daze of sleep, before Billie wakes you gently, as she hadn't left your side for one minute. ,,Darling, this is the doctor we mentioned'' she speaks and you watch as a brunette woman looks at you, a little torch in her hand. ,,Hi Y/N, do you mind if I take a quick look?'' she speaks and you simply nod, still feeling sleepy and exhausted. The torch blinds you a little and causes for your eyes to close ,,Sweetie I need you to keep your eyes open'' Cordelia ushers softly and you comply, letting the doctor finish her tests.
,,Do you feel any discomfort, pain or nausea?'' she asks and you glance between the four of them before nodding reluctantly, suddenly feeling overwhelmed with this as everything hurt and everything feels empty and confusing. ,,My head hurts'' you admit, causing for Cordelia to frown, Wilhemina's features stern as she observes, the worry almost drowning her in its intensity. And for some reason, your eyes search for the redhead who is standing opposite the bed, further away than all the others and for some reason you want to be closer to her as she seemed safe. You watch as all women leave towards the door, the doctor telling them how this wasn't uncommon given the circumstances, how she ushers something to Cordelia and wanting them to keep her in the loop, wanting to examine you closely over the next few weeks, wanting to get to the bottom of this.
By the time the three of them return, you are curled up in a ball, facing away from them, as tears prickle at your tired eyes, the confusion and pain causing you to feel a little overwhelmed, not understanding what was going on. You could feel all of these feelings, these things that you didn't understand. Cordelia's frame blurs into your vision as she kneels beside you, Billie and Wilhemina standing behind her. ,,Are you okay sweetheart?'' she asks, noticing your scared and sad expression. You don't say anything, simply blinking and letting the tears run before her hand wipes them gently, causing you to cringe at her touch, feeling overwhelmed by their presences as of right now. Cordelia senses it, her heart heavy with pain before she retracts her hand, sighing in the process ,,Would you like some space to rest?'' she speaks carefully, choosing her words in a certain way, to not overwhelm you further.
,,Yes please'' you speak quietly, causing for the blonde to nod and force a comforting smile before they leave, leaving you behind to sob into your pillow for a while before sleep washes over your tired body. They opt for Wilhemina's office in the end, as it was located right next to the bedroom, wanting to at least be a little close to you incase you needed them. Cordelia sighs, rubbing her temples in frustration before taking a seat on a nearby sofa, Billie standing nearby her arms crossed in front of her chest, her thoughts racing. Slowly, Wilhemina takes a seat in her armchair near her two girlfriends, her movements slow, matching both the physical and emotional pain the last few hours had left on her. ,,What are we going to do?'' Billie sighs, unsure what to do with herself as she begins pacing a little. ,,I think we need to be patient and give her some time'' Cordelia speaks, the doubt written on her features. ,,Like the doctor said, this can happen'' she repeats her earlier words.
,,Have either of you thought about what to do if she doesn't remember?'' Wilhemina questions, her voice and features stern as two blonde heads snap towards her. ,,She will'' Cordelia almost spits, the thought too painful for her to think it through. ,,But what if she never remembers us?'' Billie speaks, her eyes brimming with tears again. ,,We will make her remember honey, it will be alright'' Cordelia tries, walking over to Billie to wrap her in a comforting hug before glancing at Wilhemina, almost scolding her for freaking Billie out like this, despite knowing her concerns are valid and the supreme would be lying as the thought had also crossed her mind but she had pushed it down for now. ,,What are we going to do now?'' Billie asks, the other two knowing what she means as it was clear you needed some space.
,,We will go and have dinner with the girls, then we can check on her and see what to do'' Cordelia speaks softly and Billie nods, feeling safe at Cordelia's words. It takes a bit of convincing for Wilhemina to join them as she didn't feel like joining the girls, wanting to be close to you, look after you but knowing it may only make things worse as of right now. And dinner isn't exactly pleasant as your absence is noticed, Zoe and the older girls had asked and Cordelia wasn't really sure whether to fill them in, opting for now it was too soon and simply explaining that you had fallen ill and would need some rest for a few days. As Billie and Cordelia take care of the dishes and confiding in Zoe with what had happened as they needed to rely on her for a while at looking after the academy and girls, Wilhemina had opted to take some dinner and tea up to your room, carrying it in on a little tray.
As she enters the room quietly, assuming you are still asleep and struggling with both the tray and her cane a little, she is surprised to find you awake and looking at her. She smiles softly before placing the tray on the little table beside you, before clearing her throat. ,,How is the pain?'' she asks almost quietly, not wanting to cause more aching for you. ,,It's a little better'' you tell her, before she hands you some water and tablets. ,,These are painkillers from the doctor'' she explains as she watches you glance at them reluctantly but without thinking about it, you take them and she notices how you don't struggle in the slightest, her little one usually hating tablets and to take any form of medication. ,,You should eat something'' she ushers, softly handing you the tray with her shaky hands. ,,Thank you'' you whisper and smile softly at her, feeling a little less overwhelmed after some sleep.
She glances at you for a moment, before turning on her heels, thinking you still wanted some space. ,,Wilhemina?'' you ask, remembering her name from when Cordelia had told you before. ,,Yes little one?'' she asks, quickly internally scolding herself for the pet name. ,,Would you-'' you begin but stop yourself, unsure whether you could ask this of the woman. ,,What is it?'' she asks softly, taking some steps towards you again. ,,Would you mind staying with me?'' you almost whisper, before her eyes glisten a little ,,Of course Y/N'' she smiles softly, extracting a chair and sitting beside you. The room fills with silence for a while, as you eat some of the food that she had brought, also appreciating the warm tea as you felt a little cold. ,,Can you maybe tell me something?'' you ask almost reluctantly again and her head tilts a little at your request. ,,Of course, what would you like to know?'' she asks, unsure what exactly you mean.
,,Just anything?'' you ask and she feels bad then, not able to imagine what it must be like to forget, to not know anything. And so gently she fills you in about as much details as she knows about you, your age, where you are from, your favourite colour, your friends, the things you are passionate about. And you can't help but notice with how much softness and adoration she tells you those things, how kind you are, how nothing is ever too much for you as you loved helping out. She briefly mentioned you teaching at the academy and by now you assume that the place you are currently in must be said academy. ,,What academy is this?'' you ask a little confused after a while and for the first time, she halts, not instantly answering your question. ,,I- I think it's better if Cordelia explains that to you little one'' she tries and you simply leave it as that.
,,What time is it?'' you ask after a while, noticing how the room was much darker now, the sun having set a while ago. ,,It's 9pm darling'' she explains after glancing at her watch. ,,And so this is your bedroom?'' you ask after glancing around the unfamiliar room, seeing four dressers, what you assume to be on ensuite bathroom, and a large makeup table in the corner. ,,It's ours'' she explains a little hesitantly. And she can tell that this must be strange and uncomfortable ,,Do you feel like me showing you around a little?'' she asks, hoping that maybe the memories of this place would help you remember a little. ,,Yes please'' you reply, handing her back the tray she had given you, before you stand up, feeling slightly dizzy from the sudden movement but much better as the tablets are already showing their effects.
And so she takes you around the academy, first taking you to your old bedroom, now mostly empty explaining how you had lived there first before moving in with them, showing you both her and Cordelia's office, before taking you downstairs, leading you to the dining and living room, hoping that might spark something, considering the many nights you had spent together there. But by your reaction she can tell that nothing seems to ring a bell. And so at last she leads you to the kitchen where the other two blondes are still sitting and talking. As they notice you up on your feet they smile softly ,,Hey there'' Cordelia greets you warmly, taking in your features. ,,I have been showing her around'' Wilhemina announces to the other two ,,Perhaps you could show her the greenhouse Cordelia and tell her a little more about this academy'' Wilhemina ushers, her eyes speaking silently, Cordelia of course understanding what the redhead was implying. ,,Of course'' she smiles softly, before standing up. ,,Would you like to follow me outside?'' she asks you, and you nod, leaving the other two behind.
Shivering a little you take a look at the gardens, feeling the cold night air prickle at your skin a little. ,,This is the greenhouse'' she explains as the two of you enter. You glance around a little taken back and she recognises that face, sending her into a painful deja vu of when you first joined the academy and how your eyes sparkled that same way. ,,Would you like to take a seat?'' she offers, and you nod before the two of you sit in the quiet greenhouse. You glance at the blonde, for the first time really taking in her features and noticing how utterly beautiful she truly was. ,,About this academy'' she begins and you notice that same look of hesitation on her face that Wilhemina showed before. ,,This is Miss Robichaux's Academy'' she starts ,,For witches'' she carries on, startling you as your eyes widen. ,,This is a coven darling, the girls here are witches'' Cordelia explains gently, knowing this must be a lot to take in. She senses your disbelief and shock, before she places a hand on your shoulder.
,,I know this is a lot to take in'' she emphatically remarks before you look at her ,,Is this a joke?'' you ask, still in disbelief, despite having noticed some of the symbols on the tables as you entered and the countless books on potions and spells. ,,No darling'' she speaks softly again before her eyes lock with yours, trying to think of a way to prove to you that she was being genuine. ,,May I show you?'' she asks before you nod reluctantly. She walks over to one of the tables, extracting some rose petals from an earlier class, before closing her eyes and a beautiful white rose appears in front of your eyes. You gasp, your eyes flickering from the rose in her hand to her brown eyes. And then she watches the panic form across your features, as it all becomes a little overwhelming again, your head suddenly pounding again, ears ringing a little and chest rising and falling fast.
,,Okay darling, how about we get you back upstairs?'' she offers, noticing your trembling hands, before taking one into her hand and softly guiding you back inside. Once inside you find Wilhemina and Billie in the kitchen, their faces etched with concern as they notice your trembling state, already assuming the news would be a lot to take in. ,,How about we get you upstairs to bed?'' Cordelia offers but you pause, glancing between the three of them. ,,I- I don't'' you stumble over your words, feeling that same overwhelming feeling of emptiness again despite them having filled you in on more details. But it all feels too much, the thought of having to stay with them overwhelming despite the connection you feel towards them and knowing by now that they are your partners. ,,Y/N are you okay?' Billie asks, watching you seemingly struggle. ,,Can I stay in my old room?'' you blurt out, glancing at Wilhemina ,,The one you showed me?'' you ask.
Silence falls over the kitchen, Wilhemina and Billie glancing at Cordelia who stands frozen beside you, shocked at your request and utterly sad as you had always loved being close to them, always afraid of sleeping on your own. ,,I- the doctor recommended you to be under observation darling'' Billie tries, hating the idea of you being alone with all of this. ,,If that's what you want then of course, but promise to find us if you need anything?'' Cordelia offers, the other two shocked by her statement. ,,Thank you'' you breathe out almost in relief before looking at them one more time and leaving upstairs, struggling at first but eventually finding the room that Wilhemina had showed you before. ,,Why would you do that?'' Billie asks, her voice trembling before the supreme sighs ,,We need to give her time'' she announces before sighing. And so the three of them retract to their bedroom, without you, Cordelia checking on you once more and leaving some more water, pyjamas and painkiller with you, asking whether you needed anything but you politely declining. And so as the night slowly begins, neither of them manage to find much sleep, the bed feeling lonely and strange without you, feeling the urge to hold you close, the events replaying on their minds over and over again.
The next couple of days carry on like they had, you mostly spent your time on your own, the day after the accident, Cordelia had taken you to an appointment with the doctors, getting some more scans and checks done and she had worried since as you really didn't talk all that much with them, withdrawing almost. And you had felt bad ever since, the three of them really trying and showing you so much kindness. Cordelia had tried to convince you to sit in some of her classes, Wilhemina often checking on you throughout the day and Billie having left some photo albums with you. But you didn't feel ready, the headaches still returning as well as dreams at night, making it a little hard at times. A lot of questions had circled your mind and so the only thing you can do is toss and turn in bed for a while before eventually growing sick of it and sitting by the little fireplace in your room. As you glance around, you find a desk, your curiosity getting ahold of you before you open some draws, finding some books and when you read the title, the same question repeats in your mind, the question that lingered since Cordelia had filled you in on what this academy truly was.
You knew as much that this was your old room, your eyebrows furrow trying to think about whether they had mentioned anyone else staying there since. As you open the books, you find several pages on spell casting and potions and see several handwritten notes. Your eyes search the drawers until you find a pen, before it flies over a page, wanting to check whether this was your handwriting and whether you may also be a witch. The realisation ripples through you, your head hurting in that same way again as the handwriting is identical and then it dawns on you that you must also be a witch. The whole thing makes you feel sick, the lingering emptiness and confusion drowning you. You debate sleeping again but you knew it wouldn't come and so you opt for some water, the headache pounding into your skull. As you walk downstairs, you pass some witches and notice how they all smile at you, assuming they must have been your friends before. You take in the peace and quiet, hoping that you wouldn't find anyone downstairs, not necessarily in the mood after the realisation you had made.
Almost in a hurry, you rush to the kitchen, before you notice the three women that seem so familiar yet so unfamiliar at the same time. And you opt for leaving again before they notice your presence ,,Hi sweetheart'' Cordelia greets you with a warm smile, the other twos features equally filled with pain and longing. ,,Are you hungry honey? we kept you some dinner?'' Billie tries and you close your eyes for a moment to compose yourself. ,,No thank you'' you speak before explaining ,,I just came to get some water'' you explain, before Cordelia is quick to fetch a glass for you, before walking over and handing it to you. ,,Here you go love'' she speaks with so much love that it almost makes you feel bad for how angry and upset you are feeling at the moment. ,,Are you feeling okay? you look a little pale'' Billie Dean states, her features etched with concern.
You sigh then, trying hard to keep your emotions at bay before taking a sip from the water. ,,Sweeth-'' one of them speaks again and it bursts out of you, all the frustration, emptiness and their attempts of making you remember of making this better. ,,Can you stop'' you sigh, rubbing your head in frustration as it continues pounding. ,,Stop it with the constant petnames'' you sigh stomping your foot, their faces etched with worry and guilt. ,,And when were you going to tell me I'm a witch?'' you carry on, Wilhemina swallowing hard before glancing at the other two blondes. ,,How do you know that bab- Y/N?'' Billie asks, a glimmer of hope in her eyes. ,,I found a book in my room'' you announce, your voice matching your frustration. ,,I meant to tell you but I didn't want to overwhelm you'' Cordelia apologetically announces, her eyes filled with sadness. The room fills with silence before they notice a shift in your demeanour, your face considerably more pale, hands shaking as you hold onto the glass of water for support. ,,Are you okay Y/N?'' Cordelia tries again before taking a step towards you. ,,Please just leave me alone'' you almost shout in frustration as tears linger in your eyes ,,Y/N'' Wilhemina scolds, her cane banging on the floor once, causing for the pounding of your head to get even worse.
Without a word, you turn around, trying to ignore the stars forming in your vision and how much pain you are in. But then it all starts spinning a little too fast and you stop yourself, holding onto a nearby wall, Billie and Wilhemina standing frozen in their spot after your outburst before Cordelia rushes towards you, holding you up as your legs feel like giving in a little. ,,I don't - I'm sorry'' you whisper, closing your eyes bracing yourself for the pain. ,,I don't feel well'' you manage to somehow mutter before the blonde reaches for the glass, giving it to Billie who is now standing behind you. ,,May I take you upstairs Y/N?'' Cordelia tries, before you mutter out some sort of reply, unable to speak at this point. With a swift motion, both women are on either of your side, helping you up the stairs, Wilhemina following behind as they take you into your room, softly laying you down on your bed as hot tears stream down your cheeks. The redhead watches in pain, her heart aching seeing you in this much despair, Billie nervously pacing around a little, Cordelia taking in your features. Her hand lingers softly over your forehead, easing the pain that was so obviously written across your features and softly aiding you to sleep.
,,What is wrong with her?'' Billie asks nervously, before Cordelia turns to her. ,,I assume it's the headaches, the doctors mentioned that would happen''. And then the three of them stand there, almost a little awkwardly, feeling the urge to stay with you but knowing you wouldn't like it, given your withdrawal from them. And so they leave one by one, Wilhemina staying for a little while longer, watching protectively over your sleeping form but eventually joining her lovers a few doors away. Beside you, neither of them manage to get much sleep, Billie still crushed by the guilt of the whole thing, Cordelia's thoughts circling around what she could do to fix this, Wilhemina contemplating the outcome of you never remembering. And as the next morning arrives, they are the first downstairs, despite the weekend and opportunity to sleep in but they couldn't, not without their sunshine by their side who made weekend mornings so much brighter.
When you wake not much later, you feel almost relief as the pounding headache had stopped, as this was the first morning where you didn't wake after some very confusing dreams. The night prior lingers on your mind and you can't help but feel guilty, guilty for the way you had been treating them, withdrawing from them as they had showed you nothing but kindness. And as you change your clothes, getting ready for the morning ahead, you decide to do a little better today, wanting to try for them. When you eventually make it downstairs, the three of them are sitting by the kitchen table, Wilhemina reading the newspapers, Cordelia getting ready for something and Billie smoking a cigarette. ,,Good Morning'' your voice rings through the quiet kitchen, startling all three of them in the process as Billie almost drops her cigarette, Wilhemina lowering the newspaper. ,,Good morning Y/N, how are you feeling?'' Cordelia asks carefully, noticing how your features look much brighter and better, almost as if nothing ever happened. ,,Better, thank you'' you announce before taking a step towards them. ,,I'm sorry about last night'' you mumble, barely audible but they still pick it up. ,,I'm sorry about everything'' you apologise, their features softening.
,,You don't need to be sorry, we understand this must be a lot'' Cordelia softly reassures, offering you a seat and you hesitantly take it. ,,Are you hungry?'' Billie asks, smiling at you. You glance between the three of them before nodding ,,What would you like?'' she asks, happy to finally see you eating. ,,I- I'' you pause for a moment, unsure what you actually like. ,,I'm not sure'' you explain ,,What do I like?'' you ask and they glance between each other before Cordelia smiles ,,Let me make you your favourite Y/N'' and within minutes, you find a plate with eggs, some pancakes and orange juice in front of you. ,,Thank you'' you smile warmly at her before beginning to eat, your mouth watering as soon as you take some bites. ,,So what are you three doing today?'' you ask, causing Wilhemina's eyebrow to raise, surprised at your sudden change and as Billie and Cordelia begin speaking, it almost feels as it had before. ,,And I need to go to the markets today'' Cordelia announces before you look up at her ,,May I come with you?'' you ask, completely taking her by surprise.
The blonde looks at Billie and Mina who are equally surprised, Billie's heart swelling a little and the smallest smirk playing on the redheads lips. ,,Of course Y/N, I'd be delighted'' she announces. And so, Cordelia takes you to the markets, the car ride this time filled with conversation as you ask her all sorts of questions about witches and how you became one, asking about the things you used to be able to do and her filling you in with as much detail as possible. And it feels good, being in her embrace, her warm features, how she takes you around the markets, showing you her favourite stalls, taking you to a candle one and showing you her favourite scents, taking you food shopping and getting some ingredients to make your favourite things. And as Cordelia makes one last stop, you waiting in the car, you can't help but enjoy her presence, liking how warm she was, how ethereal beautiful both inside and out and as you return, you can't help but feel a little flutter in your heart. ,,How was it?'' Billie asks, the two of them still in the kitchen as you both return.
,,It was really nice'' you announce as you help the supreme empty the bags, despite her saying you should rest but you felt good and so you didn't want to rest. After unpacking most things, you find a bag with medication, assuming she picked those up on her last stop and instinctively you place them in front of Wilhemina. ,,Mina your medicine'' you speak, without thinking about it further. However, when you see her shocked expression, the other two equally startled, confusion washes over you again. ,,Y/N?'' Cordelia asks ,,How did you know that?'' her eyebrows are furrowed, Wilhemina's features very serious as you hadn't called her Mina since the accident. Billie looks at you with so much anticipation that you feel bad ,,I'm not sure'' you admit, scared to disappoint them again. ,,I'm sorry'' you mumble, feeling some tears brim in your eyes. ,,Hey, it's okay'' Cordelia reassures, her hand reaching for yours instinctively. And this time, you let her take it, holding onto her as she seemed safe for now.
The same pain in your head quickly takes over again, causing for you to take a step back, realising that maybe it was best to get some rest like Cordelia had initially suggested. ,,I'm.. going to rest for a bit if that's okay'' you speak softly, only met with understanding from your girlfriends, their gazes reassuring with a hint of concern. And as you return to your bedroom, you quickly fall asleep after taking a painkiller, unbeknownst that your memories must be connected to the random pains you would get throughout the days. They let you rest for the remainder of the day, Wilhemina bringing you some dinner in the evening and putting it on your bedside table as you are still asleep. The next day you had agreed to sit in on one of Cordelia's classes and so after breakfast with Mina and Billie, you make your way to the greenhouse, a lot of other witches already sitting and waiting for the potion class to begin. You listen intensively to the supreme, talking about the different herbs and ingredients, having somewhat of a hard time concentrating as again her beauty absolutely took you back. She looked stunning today, one of her black dresses, and you couldn't help but smile, despite it being ever so small, again you could feel the butterflies in your stomach, her voice so soft, her eyes burning with desire for her teaching.
As she begins to explain the last step for the potion, you can't help but feel your eyebrows furrowing before you begin speaking ,,Delia- isn't it supposed to be this one?'' you question, pointing towards one of the other vials and this time the whole class turns around. They had known by now what had happened and seeing your girlfriends shocked expression, you could tell you must have just said something incredibly stupid. ,,Class is dismissed for now'' Cordelia's voice rings through the air. They leave, Zoe exchanging knowing glances and you sit there, awaiting your fate and being told off. ,,How did you know that sweetie?'' she asks as she approaches you and then it kinda dawns on you that you had been remembering, despite it being ever so slowly. The blonde notices your hesitation, before taking another step towards you ,,This is good Y/N, you are remembering'' she smiles, her eyes brimming with tears but the happy feeling is quickly replaced by the returning pounding headache. And instead of sharing with her or them what was bothering you, the pain that had been lingering, you again retreat to your own bedroom, wanting some peace and quiet, away from everyone.
The next time you wake up, you had again slept through dinner and most of the day, again finding a tray on your beside, knowing it was from Billie this time as she always put some extra snacks on your tray for you. Curiously, you make your way downstairs, feeling a strange longing to the three women that apparently are your everything. You felt the urge to sit beside them, be in their presence. And you sigh in relief, seeing them sit in front of the tv, Wilhemina in her armchair doing some knitting, Cordelia on the sofa, chatting to Billie who is sitting on another armchair, as the two of them talk about something. You linger by the doorway for a minute, taking in the scene in front of you and strangely feeling like an intruder, as if you didn't belong. But your heart told you otherwise and so you clear your throat gently, startling the three of them and causing their heads to snap towards you. ,,Hi'' you awkwardly say, glancing around the room ,,Sweet- Y/N are you okay?'' Cordelia asks, their faces etched with concern. ,,Yes- um- may I sit with you?'' you ask, the two blondes face beaming with excitement, a small smile tugged on Wilhemina's lips. Instinctively, you opt for the space next to Cordelia besides your redhead girlfriend and again it doesn't go by unnoticed as that was where you usually sat, including in that same way.
This time they don't say anything, having noticed how their pointing out seems to only overwhelm you further. Yet they exchange knowing glances. Billie notices how you seem quite taken back and interested in what's on tv and it doesn't cross her mind until then that her show was playing in the background. She sees your features focusing on the scenes, Billie not in any of the scenes as of right now ,,Is this your show?'' you ask as you glance at her and again the three of them are taken back by how you would know that, unsure whether either of them may have managed it in the past. ,,Yes darling'' Billie announces. A little while later, the image is almost as it had been before, Billie now snuggled up on the sofa besides Cordelia, you also in the blondes arms slightly as she opted for putting an arm around you and you not refusing. Wilhemina sitting beside you three and watching with pride and the image gives her hope. She had struggled with the idea of you not remembering lately but seeing your milestones makes her unbelievably proud. As you continue watching her show, you suddenly feel an unsettling feeling in your stomach, the feeling of doom, that something was coming, something was severely off.
And then as if by some miracle, your mind is flooded with images, voices, scenes that you can't pinpoint. Your eyes widen as you vividly remember floating in the air, the screams of someone calling for help, confusing pictures of Cordelia's hands filled with blood, your blood. Suddenly your whole body shakes in the blondes arms, startling the three of them. ,,Y/N- are you okay?'' the redhead asks, noticing your shocked and yet unreadable expression. Cordelia's hand reaches for yours, trying to offer you reassurance but you freeze for a moment, unable to process everything your brain was currently throwing at you. ,,Sorry I- I'm tired'' you speak quickly before heading upstairs, leaving behind your three concerned girlfriends. ,,Do you think it was the show that triggered her?'' Billie sighs, walking over to her bag to sneak away for the comfort of a cigarette. ,,I'm not sure'' Cordelia speaks, her face filled with hesitation and concern, unsure why you had been reacting the way you did. Eventually, they opt for bed, choosing to give you some space, thinking that was what you would prefer, but despite that, neither of them could find much sleep, the concern and grief about you losing your memories and them losing their little sunshine, lingering on their minds.
If they had checked on you, they would have found you pacing through your old bedroom, occasionally curling into a ball on your bed, before pacing again as it seems that all your memories are returning. It was painful and slow, the first memories returning from the accident and the hospital, those ones particularly triggering. After followed all the good ones, each one from your girlfriends, before some more painful ones followed. And it hurt, your body on fire, as well as your mind, the throbbing in your head almost knocking the breath from your lungs. It felt like you were going through some weird magic ritual, wondering for a second whether Cordelia may have done something but knowing your Delia would never do this without your consent. And then at last, after several hours it finally stops, your ears ringing a little as the pain lingers but having sufficiently decreased. And then your eyes widen again, suddenly remembering it all, your heart weighing heavy with the guilt, not remotely able to understand how horrible these few weeks must have been with you like this. And then it dawns on you how much had been withdrawing, almost in disbelief to be in your old bedroom.
And then with steps as quick as light, you burst through your door, quickly making your way towards your real bedroom, hesitating for a moment but then the longing wins. Opening the door, not caring you find the three of them in bed, Wilhemina and Cordelia instantly jolt up, seeing your slightly panicked expression, Billie slowly turning around, a little confused. ,,Mina'' you whisper as you take in her appearance, as if you had just woken up, as if you are seeing her again for the first time in weeks. ,,Mina'' you cry her name out now, tears streaming down your cheeks. Cordelia's worried brown eyes meet her redhead lover's. And Wilhemina is quick to aid to your side, balancing on her cane before standing in front of you, her hand softly wiping your tears ,,What is it little one?'' she asks, her features soft but filled with concern. ,,I- I remember'' you stutter, and as you look up at her, her own tears greet you. She doesn't say anything, simply pulling you forward and into her arms, your head leaning against her chest, before Cordelia kneels in front of you, causing you to leave Wilhemina's arms for a moment. ,,Sweetie?'' she asks carefully, as if to make sure it really was you. ,,Delia-'' you cry out, your faces equally crumbling in front of each other. ,,My god- I'm so sorry'' you cry out, but Cordelia is quick to take you into her arms, tears of relief, rolling down her cheeks.
,,What is it?'' Billie's voice rings through the air but as she meets Wilhemina's expression, she instantly knows. ,,Oh- babydoll'' Billie whispers, quickly on her feet to equally take you into her arms. And in the end, the four of you are sitting on your bed, finally having you back where you belong. And for hours, you seem to apologise, for withdrawing, for not remembering sooner, for staying in your old bedroom. But they are quick to shush each of those thoughts, making you understand that this wasn't your fault and that they feel like they owe you an apology. ,,I'm so sorry this happened to you babydoll'' Billie apologises and by the way her voice shakes, you can tell she was blaming herself still. ,,This wasn't your fault Billie'' you reassure, before you ask Cordelia how they dealt with those spirits in the end and her filling you in. And then a silence follows, a comfortable one, finally being with your lovers again, finally remembering just why you loved each of them so much. For a while, you spent some time on Billie's lap, her telling you over and over again how brave you had been, snuggling into you, before the blonde softly falls asleep, content with having her babydoll back. Next you find yourself in Delia's arms, the blonde listening contently how you ended up remembering, her face crumbling as you explained the depths of pain you had gone through. ,,You were so brave sweetheart'' she tells you over and over again, eventually kissing you good night, content to have her little sunshine back.
And at last, you find yourself in Wilhemina's arms, your head resting comfortably on her chest as you look up at her features. It was dark, the only light source the moon illuminating the coven slightly, it was quiet, Billie and Delia's snoring softly filling the room. And then Wilhemina breaks it, telling you how glad she was to have you remember, how sorry she was and how proud she was of you. Her words are quiet, delicate and so unlike her usual demeanour. You snuggle into her further, feeling safe with her arms wrapped around you. ,,The truth is little one- I could never do this without you'' she admits and when you meet her brown eyes, you tear up again, her words so raw, filled with honesty as she fights back her walls and usual sternness keeping her from revealing her feelings like that. And so, the two of you hold onto each other through the night, eventually sleep washing over you both. Wilhemina content with having her little one back. And so after a long journey, you finally are back where you belong, right there, right now, with them.
#cordelia goode#sarah paulson#wilhemina venable#ahs#american horror story#billie dean howard#sarah paulson x reader#asks#cordelia goode x reader#cordelia goode imagine#wilhemina venable x reader#billie dean howard x reader
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Now that they can, would they want to spend a lot of time together? (Patreon)
#Doodles#Adventure Time#Fionna and Cake#Simon Petrikov#Marceline#Hhhh I feel so bad for both of them 💔#Obviously Simon misses her since she's like the one tether he still has to ''his'' time - they were both born before all the Everything#And I'm sure Marceline misses Simon too but like - even this Simon isn't ''her'' Simon. They met when he was already affected by the Crown#They clearly love each other when they see each other when Simon is as much himself as he can be!#But I can't help but wonder if it would be painful to spend time with this sad lonely magicless man - and how guilty that would make Simon#He wants to still be a part of her life! But how much of himself does he even have to offer now?#And the guilt would go round and round - she sees it in him and he sees that in her and they just both feel bad!#I really can't blame him for being a little emotionally closed and her being distant - they're not who they were#With all that said I still really love their dynamic <3 They're /not/ who they used to be but they've still got such an interesting relation#I think in the moments that they do have together where they're both trying to be good for each other Marcy would really push her humour ♪#She's got 1000 years of silliness to get out of her system to her bestie! I'm sure she's got the material hehe#Even if he still sees her as a little girl - I mean that just adds to the joke if she says something a bit blue lol#I don't think he'd actually keep the sharp teeth - it's more of a visual metaphor of how Marceline sees him in these kinds of moments#It's hard to leave it behind!
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jealousy
gojo satoru x fem!reader
summary: satoru doesn't like the way the barista is looking at you
a/n: figured i'd give you all a little fluff (save me from this void)
last part | next part
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year five.
“megumi, go get your mom.”
satoru and megumi are sitting in a crowded cafe, saving your spot, waiting for you to come back.
while the sun coming in through the window satoru is sitting across from is partially blinding him, he can still see you.
you, trying to order, being ogled by the barista who's been granted the pleasure of speaking to you. your smile is normal--to satoru's obvious disdain--and you don't even seem to mind the man's obvious flirting.
(not that it really means much. when satoru leans in like that, you just push him away. when he swoons at the way you've done your hair on any specific day, you just roll your eyes.
so maybe you're not the best judge of flirting. or attraction. or how to reject a tiny schoolboy, like the one you're talking to.)
satoru's only been watching this interaction for thirty seconds, but he's had enough.
“why?” megumi turns, looking back at you. “she’s getting us hot chocolate.”
satoru sighs, no care in the world. can't the kid ever listen to him? “go hold her hand then.”
“why?”
“because.”
“but why?”
satoru gives megumi a (pathetic) glare. “listen to me, young man," he tries to say it like you would--if megumi ever denied any of your requests--but it doesn't work. satoru has to try not to laugh directly after the words are out of his mouth.
so what if he doesn't want you talking to that kid? he's just looking out for you.
megumi's brows raise. he looks... almost amused. “what’s wrong with you? you go hold her hand.”
satoru hangs his head. you told him to sit here and keep the table for all of you, told him to watch megumi and not do anything stupid--which, to be fair, is difficult for him. so he can't go get you (save you).
and plus, he doesn't want you to know that he cares. if you like that kid--with his stupid dark hair and eyes and soft smile and obvious heart eyes--then he doesn't want to know.
and if he goes up to you, he'll know.
“i can’t," he tells megumi, instead of saying any of that. the boy would just cackle in his face.
“are you scared?” megumi asks, very seriously, as if satoru is afraid of anything.
(besides you falling for someone else, of course. but that doesn't count).
he looks over to the kid again, who you're chatting idly with as you search through your purse. he wonders if you're telling the barista that you spend every night in his bed, making out with him until your lips are puffy.
if he keeps smiling at you like that satoru is going to get up and tell him himself.
satoru scoffs, looking away finally, back to megumi who looks thoroughly entertained by his father's pain. he crosses his arms. “no.”
megumi shrugs, looking back again. seriously, satoru should've kicked him out when he had the chance. he probably would've been fine with the zenin clan. probably.
“well, i’m not doing it," the boy says, with obvious satisfaction.
if only tsumiki was here. satoru never should've let megumi ditch school, or let him come with you both to get coffee. tsumiki would help him. she probably would've asked you to get yakitori instead and satoru could listen to you try to make small talk with a waitress instead of that guy.
“megumi fushiguro,” satoru begins, voice rough. “do you want your mother to live in a rat-infested apartment with a random, cesspit man, and several tiny babies running around all of the time? tiny wimpy babies? normal, human babies. you’ll have to stay over there and share a bed with multiple infants who will spit up on you.”
megumi blinks. “what are you even talking about?”
“go stand next to her," satoru hisses, because he swears he can hear your laugh from across the cafe, and honestly he's never wanted to destroy an establishment more.
and that's saying something.
at least the man would be without a job and satoru would never have to see him push his hair back and tilt his head at you again.
megumi looks back again like it's going to explain anything satoru does, and he smirks. “that guy doesn’t look too bad.”
satoru's jaw clenches. “i will mismatch all of your socks.”
megumi scowls at him. "all of my socks are the same, after last time."
satoru huffs and leans back against his chair, pouting. "what did i do to deserve this?"
“do you think mom likes him?” megumi asks, voice so innocent it makes satoru want to shave his hair off.
“go.”
megumi blinks at him, tilting his head. yeah, he's really putting on an act now. “but she said to wait here," he reminds satoru like it matters.
“tell her you missed her, or something," satoru goes to wave a hand, but his hand only clenches when he physically sees you laugh at the man. you're not even ordering now, you're just standing there (waiting for their drinks) talking to the guy.
“you tell her you missed her," megumi retorts, enjoying satoru's one and only weakness.
"no."
"she's laughing," megumi points out, resting his chin on a hand. "and it's rude to interrupt grown-ups when they talk."
“megumi,” satoru begs, hating the weird, annoying feeling in his chest. he wants to dig his own heart out and yell at it. “please.”
megumi is basically smirking at him now, waiting for a beat longer for satoru to really break--and seriously kill every person within a ten-mile radius--but eventually, right before it happens, the boy sighs. his eyes are evil, evil things.
"fine," he tells satoru, rolling his eyes. he stands up from his hair and pats satoru on the shoulder like it will make up for anything. the boy has the worst smile satoru's ever seen in his life.
and then he makes his way through the line of people--seriously, this guy is a terrible barista--and taps you on your waist, going to stand right up against the counter. megumi says something to you--you will all of your charm, and your irresistible smiles--and you hold a hand out to him, which he grabs immediately.
your smile, satoru notices with immense relief, shifts on instinct. it goes from something formal and polite to something genuine. you look down at your son and the barista you've been talking to for the last minute is completely irrelevant.
and satoru takes great satisfaction in the way the kid's eyes widen, and the instinctual step back he takes--like he knows that satoru is going to hurt him if he continues to lean over the counter towards you.
satoru relaxes, watching you ask megumi something, but only slightly.
and after a second you turn your head, raising a brow at him.
the little brat.
satoru just smiles--offering you more than some shotty barista ever could--and leans back in his chair.
*
“why are you being so weird today?”
satoru’s chin is on your head, and even though you can’t see his smile, it falters, just a little bit. "don't know what you're talking about."
"you're sticky."
"i just showered."
"okay," you say, turning and rolling your eyes at satoru's pout. instantly his hands go to your waist, keeping you right there with him. "first of all, no you didn't. and i didn't mean literally. you're... clingy. more clingy than usual."
"i can't want to be around you?"
you give him a blank stare. "not when you're being weird about it."
"how am i being weird?"
"how aren't you?"
satoru grins, leaning his head down to push his nose into your cheek. you smell like something sweet--something he'd devour in an instant--but he's not sure what. he doesn't even care. he doesn't answer that question, only hums into your skin.
"see what i mean?"
"it's not my fault that you're comfy."
"oh, im so sorry," you say, fake pity in your voice. "let me just turn myself into stone real quick."
satoru rolls his eyes, pulling back just so he can see the amused look on your face--yeah, he knows that you don't actually care. but the more he hangs onto you, the more affection he shows, the warier you get.
and that's perfectly fine with him, actually. as long as you don't push him away.
"please do," he says, so genuinely. "it would make this a lot easier."
"make what a lot easier?" you ask, voice a bit softer. maybe it's because he's looking at you now, actually looking.
and satoru knows, really knows, that there's not a single other person in the world who you look at like this. there's not another man that you'd let sniff you, no other man that would dare to irritate you the way that he loves to.
satoru's worked several years to get you to be this comfortable, this easy around him. and even if there was someone else--he wouldn't give you up without a fight.
you're his in a way that transcends labels or reality.
still, he doesn't answer that question (because you already know). he only smiles a bit more, leans in, and basks in the way your lips mold to his immediately.
*
next part | series masterlist
#gojo satoru#gojo satoru x reader#gojo x reader#jjk gojo#gojo satoru x you#gojo satoru x y/n#satoru gojo x reader#satoru gojo x you#satoru gojo x y/n#satoru x reader#satoru x you#satoru x y/n#gojo x you#gojo x y/n#satoru gojo#jjk x reader#jjk x you#jjk x y/n#jujutsu kaisen x reader#a typical family
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YOU STOLE IT
( what happens when lando reunites with the girl who stole his first kiss ? )
warning : a bit of jealousy, fluff, lot of fluff
note : i love this okay. i won't write a part 2 so no requests please !!
word count : 4.9k
Lando hasn't always been very lucky in love. While he separated from a failed romantic relationship, he now finds himself alone, surrounded by his friends who are experiencing their perfect love, alongside their soulmates.
This doesn't bother him that much, since he himself admitted preferring to concentrate on his sporting career and thus become one of the best F1 drivers. No girlfriend yet.
But when he has to endure all day long the sweet words that other drivers address to their lovers, when he himself can feel love in the air, it becomes difficult not to think about starting a new chapter, this time here happy and healthy. A chapter that will fill him with happiness, as he has never been before.
Is this decision of not having enough time to find a girlfriend in order to concentrate on sport actually an excuse to hide the pain and despair that is gradually beginning to nestle in his heart?
He tries as best he can to reassure himself, to convince himself that he doesn't need this feeling of being completely in love and devoted to a girl. But when he continues to be the third wheel among the couples his friends form, he comes to desire a relationship more than anything else.
And every time, he can't help but think of this girl. This pretty girl he met during his summer vacation when he was 16. She was divinely beautiful, her shy but bubbly personality made Lando's heart capsize in a unique way, his whole being was alarmed just by hearing her name.
They both had a wonderful vacation, just the two of them together. During these two summer months, they did not let go of each other, spending every day alongside each other. They had become so close and complicit that they proclaimed themselves best friends from their first meeting during a kart race where Lando was racing for his life.
And since that day, they both developed deep feelings for each other. At first it was innocent. And it still is, in fact. They just thought it was a deep friendly connection, that they were just friendly soulmates. That those little stolen smiles and tactile touches were just childish, and just affectionate.
But it turned out that his feelings were ultimately more than that. More than just a friendly relationship. Lando found himself falling in love with you so hard, so passionately that he regretted not asking for your number when you two suddenly said goodbye.
You were his first love. And you still are. He thought that with time, you would eventually slip out of his head, that he would eventually forget you and move on, that it was just a big embarrassing crush from his youth but that he wouldn't think about it anymore growing up.
But that is absolutely not the case. He hasn't stopped thinking about you for 8 years. Every day, even before going to sleep, the only person he thinks about is you, that little girl he was madly in love with before.
He knows it, he maybe denies it a little, but deep down he realizes that he still has feelings for you. Perhaps less intense, less ardent, but there is no doubt that his romantic feelings will double in strength if he meets you again one day.
Of course, the old relationships, flirts, that he had before were sincere and true. He liked these few girls, that he was even happy in his last relationship. But for all that, it was by stopping this relationship and these flirts that he realized that everything brought him back to you. No matter what girl he meets, the only one who will forever remain deeply anchored in his heart is you.
He knows now that you two were more than friendly soulmates. Well, at least from his point of view. He was absolutely unsure about your feelings, which is why during these summer vacations, he preferred not to tell you anything for fear of destroying such a pure and important friendship in his eyes.
But again, he finds himself thinking about you, about how everything would be different with you. It was by going through all these different relationships with girls that he understood that he had never felt anything as powerful as with you. All these girls don't give him even a quarter of what he felt for you back then. So, how will this feeling change when he has the opportunity to meet you again?
The warm air of Saudi Arabia blows gently through the driver's curly hair. Free practice will begin in a few hours now, so Lando is using this time cooped up in the garage, surrounded by his teammate and his racing team, to discuss about the car.
“Hello Oscar!!” Lando's teammate is welcomed by his girlfriend, Lily, who smiles lovingly at him. The interview with the team is over, and she took the opportunity to spend some time with her boyfriend Oscar. The second driver comes to wrap his arms around his lover, before pressing a kiss to her forehead. Lando scoffs and rolls his eyes exaggeratedly. “Can you do this in private please? In addition to be the third wheel, I have nausea coming on.”
Oscar mocks his teammate, still holding Lily tightly in his arms. “Mate, it’s not my fault you’re a failure in love.” The Brit stops himself from hitting him, before putting on his McLaren cap. “Need I remind you that I’ve been in a relationship before?” He says to him with a completely proud look. “Couple who ended up in a failure, by the way.” He remarks, pointing at him.
“I really loved her…” The curly pauses. “It’s just that there is someone who- no, nothing, forget what I've said” He grumbles and withdraws into himself. Oscar frowns, Lily now concerned about the situation. “What?” She questions him gently.
Lando refuses to face this situation and simply shrugs his shoulders and ends up running away to join Zack further away. He can't say more, he can't talk about this girl who obsesses him. The two lovers look at each other confused by the British's behavior.
Zack smiled as he saw Lando walking towards him. “Are you already tired of feeling love in the air?” He says in order to tease him, which works. “Stop with that, I don’t care if I’m in a relationship or not.” What a lie. Zack knows his driver is lying, but he doesn't bother him more than that, not wanting to make him uncomfortable.
“So, how are things going at Ferrari?” Lando asks to quickly change the subject, not wanting to face another charade about his catastrophic dating situation. The two men then turn towards the Ferrari garage, where they can see the two drivers and the mechanics. "They look like they have a really good car, that's all I can tell you. But that doesn't mean-"
But it's too late, the British Mclaren driver no longer listens to his boss. As the Ferrari mechanics and strategists set to work, he saw among this small crowd Charles alongside a girl. At first glance, he thought it was his girlfriend. But upon closer observation, the woman, who is facing away, has a little shorter hair and is smaller in stature. And her hair color reminds him of her.
The girl he's been hopelessly in love with for 8 years now. But it can't be real, right? Why would you be here at the free practice sessions, and even more so accompanied by Charles Leclerc? His eyes must surely be hallucinating. But that silhouette from behind reminds him so much of you. But he tries to reassure himself. Or rather convince himself that there are so many brown girls in the paddock that he has confused you with someone else.
“Are you still listening to me or not?” Zack's serious voice rang in his ears. "Uh, yeah, sorry..." "You must need some time alone, I think" A mocking but concerned smile takes its place on Zack's face. “Yes, I think I need a little rest, excuse me” Lando smiles at him with difficulty before his boss goes further away.
The driver takes a deep breath. He can't help but look away at Charles and that girl. The more he looks, the more he feels like he's going back 8 years and seeing the girl he loves in front of him. He needs to know. He needs to be reassured and to be sure if this girl is really you.
And as if fate had heard it, the woman disappears from the garage, and seems to be heading to the paddock. So the British guy doesn't miss this chance and almost runs behind her to follow her. A few people give him confused and questioning looks, but he continues to pursue this dark-haired woman who hypnotizes him.
As he gets closer to you, his heart beats harder and harder. He feels like he's going to burst out of his chest and this feeling of stress eating away at him makes him want to vomit. Because he is realizing that he may have found his first love again. His eternal childhood crush.
That all those nights lost looking for you on social medias, trying to find your account and reconnect with you may not have been in vain. That all those nights lost thinking about you for a long time before falling asleep may not have been wasted in vain. That all these memories of you that he replays in his head finally make sense.
So, he goes for it without a second’s hesitation. "Excuse me ?" He speaks a little hesitantly, afraid of ending up with a woman who doesn't know him. But when the girl turns around, her brown hair flowing in the air, her eyes meeting his, Lando's heart skips several beats.
He finally found you.
The look of shock and surprise on your face mirrors Lando’s perfectly. Neither of you knows how to react, so you stay stuck like this for what seems like an eternity. But it is during this moment that the air suddenly seems changed. As if a connection, which once existed, was finally present again. As if an invisible link had finally reconnected between you, and united you for eternity. This change in atmosphere makes Lando's heart beat a little harder.
It seems unreal. So unreal that he thinks he's dreaming for a moment. For years, he never stopped thinking about you. To wonder what had become of you, what you looked like. And here you are now in front of him, more radiant than ever. This supernatural trance finally breaks when you decide to speak.
"Lando?!...Lando!!" You can't help but smile with all your teeth, a smile so sincere and strong. And oh God he suffered so much for the last eight years without being able to admire your magnificent smile. He adores it so much that he dreams of framing it in his memory forever. He knows how weak he becomes every time he gets the chance to admire your smile.
He can't help the big smile that comes over him as well. He feels so many emotions inside him that he feels like he's going to explode with happiness. "Y/n! Oh it's really you, I can't believe it!!" He can't even hide his joy and excitement, which makes you smile more, although it already seems impossible considering your cheeks already tired from just smiling.
“Me either, I feel like I’m in a dream” You admit, still a little surprised. “I didn’t think you were going to recognize me to be honest” You tell him, trying to contain your bomb of joy. “How could I not recognize you, when you are literally the most precious person to me?”
This simple sentence makes you blush violently, as you try to hide your embarrassment. “Uh- well it’s been 8 years since we last saw each other, so I doubt I’m still your favorite person” You laugh sweetly, and the sweet sound melts his heart. “So don’t doubt anymore, because you really are y/n” He addresses these few words to you while looking into yours.
And that's when he realizes how much you've changed. But changed in an incredibly beautiful way. You have kept this divine beauty which never fails to take his breath away. Your sweet facial features, that beautiful smile that he can't help but be obsessed with, and just simply your face that he could gaze at for hours and hours without ever getting tired of it.
You were already very beautiful when you were younger, when you were teenagers. But now you are infinitely more magnificent and resplendent. You look much more mature, and much more feminine. He has the impression of seeing an angel, a goddess before him. And that too has not changed, you remain for him the most beautiful woman he has ever met in his entire life.
The same goes for you. He's grown up so much, he's no longer the immature but adorable little Lando you loved so much before. Now he's a real man. He is more muscular, more virile but above all he has retained this eternal beauty and attractiveness. His beard makes him look a lot older too.
And then his hair. You teased him back then because he had trouble combing his hair. But these beautiful silky and shiny curls make you want and want to play with them, to caress them until they are messy enough for you to style them again.
“I see that my karting races have brought you to the wonderful world of Formula 1” The driver then says in order to hide the fact that he has been gazing at you for a few minutes now. You chuckle, before nodding. “Yeah, it must be said that a certain Lando Norris passed on his passion for motorsport to me” He lets out a little embarrassed laugh before turning his attention back to you.
"But Lando Norris was replaced by his opponent apparently. Bad luck." Lando's eyes land on the monegasque Ferrari driver who joins the conversation, right next to you. His tone turns colder as he stares at Charles. He can't help but feel a pang - or rather a big pang - of jealousy at the idea that you potentially replaced him with the monegasque driver.
Maybe your heart finally fell for Charles? Maybe in the end you always preferred him. He can't get these assumptions out of his head, because they haunt him now and just thinking about them makes him even more jealous. How come you're as close to Charles as you once were to Lando?
"Wow, what a reunion! Y/n told me how you were best friends before" Charles smiles kindly, and Lando seems surprised by his words. “Did she really tell you?” He asks suddenly. You clear your throat, embarrassed by what you told your friend about your relationship with the Brit.
"Yes, she told me so many things about you. That you were her favorite boy - and still are, that she loved spending time with you so much, that she really found you adorable and cute-” “Hey shut up!!” You beg Charles, placing the palm of your hand over his mouth.
Lando feels himself blush violently upon hearing Charles' words. Is this really true? “Do you think I’m cute ?” He teases you gently, but you feel even more embarrassed that you end up pressing your hands to your cheeks to hide the already terribly apparent red color.
"And that's not all, I still forgot lots and lots of things... anyway, I'll leave you, work awaits me again" Charles ends up patting the Mclaren driver on the shoulder, before to give you a smile and walk away.
A silence falls for a moment. The atmosphere has suddenly changed, it's more tense. But tense because you now know that a more than ambiguous and friendly feeling has settled between you. Tension paralyzes you as you fight the urge to jump into each other's arms.
Lando finally clears his throat before looking into your beautiful eyes. “How did you meet Charles?” “I’m a friend of his girlfriend, and she introduced us.” You respond simply, staring at him intently. Until you notice that his eyes no longer support your gaze but attack your lips.
It makes you think of that moment. And it makes him think of that moment too.
He stared intently at your pink lips. He wonders if he can. If he has the right. If he can taste them again. To move his lips on yours, to see if they are as soft as they seem.
To relive this moment. This moment, which is undoubtedly the most beautiful of his memories, and even more the most beautiful day of his life.
-
England was probably now one of your favorite destinations. Maybe because you found your confidant there, your best friend, this boy as adorable as he was immature who dreamed of being a Formula 1 driver. But all good things come to an end, and you already knew that destiny had to separate your paths. That these two months of vacation spent alongside Lando will only be distant but happy memories of your adolescence, and that you will perhaps end up watching him race on TV, being only a spectator and no longer his childhood best friend.
Lando knew it too. He knew that you had to return to your homeland, because after all England was only the destination your parents had chosen for the summer holidays. But his heart was breaking, suffocating at the idea of letting you go, when he had just accepted the fact that you were for him, potentially the woman of his life. You couldn't suppress the feeling of apprehension and sadness, as each minute that passed reminded you of how much time you would miss, passing by at a crazy speed.
Sitting on large rocks on the beach, you both admired the beautiful sunset that was falling on this last day of vacation. Tomorrow, a new chapter would begin. So you wanted to fully enjoy your last moments with your secret lover, because you might never meet him again. Silence reigned, peacefully, while the sound of the insolent waves lulled your ears with a bitter melody. You hoped you could slow down time, or rather extend it, because he seemed so stingy and selfish about giving you a little more to even exchange your unspoken thoughts.
Suddenly, you felt the boy's gaze on you, a gaze so intense that you had to turn your head away to look at him the same way. A mischievous smile appeared on his thin lips, as he opened his mouth to say a few words to you. “You promised me a gift if I won my kart race. I’m still waiting for it, Y/n.” His eyes filled with mischief and impatience, as you remembered the promise you had made to him. He had won his karting race earlier in the day, and you had promised him a gift if he managed to win it. However, you didn't think it would be so easy, since you had secretly chosen a rather... surprising gift.
A kiss. Not on his cheek, his forehead, or even his temple. No, it was more than just a childish, awkward kiss. A real, quick kiss on his lips. You thought about it because, although you sincerely believed in Lando's phenomenal abilities, you didn't think he would end up on the top step of the podium so easily and quickly. And now you're in trouble. Lando continues to stare at you mischievously, still impatient to discover your precious gift. Your brain was no longer able to function, your heart was speeding up. Did you really have to go for it? Take the plunge and place your lips on his?
Lando's impatience and waiting were more evident, while you were still panicking inside. And then, that's when you understood. That there was only him in your heart, and that there was only one chance. Only one life to live it to the fullest, without regretting anything. That worst case scenario, you'll go home the next day, forgetting this stupid promise and action. That in the end, this vacation, this boy, and this kiss, will remain engraved as the most beautiful adolescent chapter of your life, and that you will remember it with full joy and nostalgia.
Then the next second, Lando was surprised to feel a pair of lips on his. The kiss only lasted a short second, yet long enough for him to feel a bunch of different emotions. His heart felt like it was stopping, just as his brain was trying to properly process what had just happened. A powerful, strange but sweet feeling came over the young British man. He had just received his first kiss, and even more so from the girl he loved desperately. As you pulled back to look into his eyes, his looked back at you, confused. But because he understood.
He understood that this was love. That he was destined to remain faithful to you, for the rest of his life, because that kiss was the promise that his heart would belong to you forever.
-
It's been a little over a week now since you and Lando got together. And these last few days have been filled with nostalgia, reunions and above all strong and intense emotions. After the Jeddah race, Lando asked you to spend time together. Finally, he secretly wanted to insinuate that he wanted to spend every minute of his time by your side. Like before, like eight years ago.
He had finally found his childhood crush, the woman he considered the love of his life, and so he wasn't going to let her escape so easily. Especially since this reunion made him rekindle these deep feelings that he had not lost, but balked at because he had come to the conclusion that he will never find you again. However, talking to you again, spending time with you made him feel the love he had for you, but so much more intense, so much stronger and more powerful.
He's never felt like this before with any other girl, he's never seen himself in this state. Completely and obsessively in love, desperate to receive your attention and stay with you. Finding you was a sentimental blow to him, while he found himself lost forever in your heart. Finding you sealed his heart in your hands for eternity.
“It was a great day.” You hasten to say as a pretty smile takes place on your face. The driver looks at you lovingly, as he nods his head in approval. “Especially when I beat you at karting. It was the best moment of the day” He teases you and you stare at him. "I drove into the barrier because you hit my kart with yours. It doesn't count" You try to defend yourself.
“It doesn’t matter, I still won.” He adds as you sit side by side on the warm sand of the beach. “Still as narcissistic as back then” You roll your eyes but don’t hide that teasing smile on your face. “Still the same Lando Norris that you loved so much” He adds, his eyes scanning the horizon in the distance.
You swallow with difficulty, a lump in your throat. “Loved uh…” You whisper to yourself. Raising your head, you are greeted by the sunset. A pretty sunset, the same one that accompanied you on that last day of vacation eight years ago. You can't help but feel this feeling of nostalgia, of happiness.
It's exactly the same pretty frame, and the same boy by your side. It reminds you so much of that beautiful day long ago. Your heart warms at the thought. You finally found the man you love so much, and you couldn't be happier than right now.
The waves play the same melody, but this time the melody is more beautiful. Brighter and strangely romantic. As you gaze at the clouds in the distance, you feel Lando's intense gaze on you. Exactly the same look he gave you back then. Then, as if you were rehearsing the same scene, like a play that you are performing to perfection, you turn around to lock your gaze with his.
And there, that famous mischievous smile takes over his lips. Eight years later, he has the same look, this smile that changed everything. "You forgot your promise again, like back then. I'm still waiting for it, y/n" His words hit you like a bomb. Because they are exactly the same ones he said to you the day you made that stupid promise to him. This stupid gift.
And as if you weren't stupid enough, you secretly thought of the same gift. You internally promised yourself that you would give him the same kiss if he managed to beat you in karting. And he did it, as if he had put all his soul into the race to deserve this surprise gift from you. You feel helpless as the same panic takes hold of you. Everything seems so unreal. This sweet memory will finally happen again.
You see his eyes drop to your lips for a split second. But it's that split second that changes everything about you. Now you know it's for life. That you found the boy of your heart, that you will never leave him again, even if he doesn't feel the same way as you. That you only have one life to regret nothing, and this childhood kiss you have never regretted. So you never want to regret it.
You smile shyly, and without him being able to do anything, you crash your lips onto his. Lando's eyes widen, but he finally realizes what's happening. And he doesn't wait any longer to move his lips to yours. But this time the kiss is totally different. It is no longer innocent and shy like it used to be. It's no longer a little kiss between two teenagers who promised each other a gift.
No, this time it's much more romantic. More intense, deep and passionate. It's so comforting and sweet. This kiss is the fruit of the unconditional love he feels for you. So, he continues to deepen the kiss, his hand delicately cupping your cheek while his arm comes around your waist.
He licks your bottom lip with his tongue before nibbling it gently, letting you completely devote yourself to him. He continues to kiss you passionately, but yet it's not vulgar or crude. It's a soft and pleasant kiss, where only love is exchanged between your lips.
You finally broke the kiss by pulling back, a shy smile matching your pink cheeks perfectly. He opens his eyes, a silly smile on his lips before quickly pecking your lips again. You stay like that for a moment, admiring each other for a long time, love in your eyes.
"I'm so fucking in love with you, baby. Not since yesterday, not since last week, no. Since ages ago, for so long that I've stopped counting." You smile at him tenderly, your cheeks still pink. "Me too, Lando. I've loved you since we first met."
He smiles wider as his arms pull you a little closer to him. "You know, you're the girl who stole my first kiss. And you're also the only girl who managed to steal my heart. My heart has been yours for eight years, since the very moment you took me kissed." You can’t help but giggle, which melts Lando’s heart. “I thought you stopped counting.” He scratches the back of his neck, somewhat embarrassed. “Let’s just say I kept counting because I was desperate to know when I was going to find the woman I love.”
In the meantime he leaned over you, until you were lying on the soft sand. “Every day you were gone was like a bullet in my chest.” “What a romantic, I’m almost going to get emotional” You tease, a mocking laugh coming from you. “Still as teasing as before” He adds, pressing a kiss to your cheek.
"For eight years, you were the only girl who never stopped staying anchored in my thoughts. From our first kiss, my heart already belonged to you, and it will continue to be yours for the rest of my life. I never wanted any other girl but you, and I waited so long for you that I'll never let you go. I love you so much, sweetheart” His words warm your heart, as you gently caress his face with your thumbs. “I’m completely in love with you too, Lan.” And in these last words, he rushes to kiss you again.
You feel like eight years ago, like the two idiots in love who stole their first kiss. Nothing has changed except the reality that reminds you that your love is bound for eternity, and that it will continue to exist because it is deeper and more passionate every day. That this is the present moment, and that your hearts are finally filled with happiness to have been able to find their other half, after so many years of desperately continuing to live without the presence of the other.
#f1 imagine#f1 x reader#f1 fanfic#lando norris x reader#lando norris imagine#lando norris x y/n#lando norris x you#ln4 imagine#lando norris fluff#lando norris fanfic
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Staff Reacting to Reader wanting to Leave.
I've gotten a lot of asks to finish this series so I decided that now is the best time. Sorry if these are ooc.
Also shout out to @dilatorywriting her characterization of the staff is the best. Go check out her work.
first years--second years--third years.
---
Divus Crewel
Divus--all of Night Ravens Staff would be lying if they said they hadn't heard the whispering of the students, their concern and worry filling the hallways. At least in the beginning, it was more aggravating than anything. Student's weren't paying attention in class, unless you were there, which is strange because it's usually the other way around.
Divus would be lying if he said he didn't care about you. It was aggravating really, the need to protect you from these ravenous students, the need to keep you under his watchful gaze at all times, the need to make sure you are safe, even when he knows that no one will harm you, it's aggravating. It's not your fault, of course it's not your fault, it's these pathetic pups, dumping their problems onto you, taking up all your time, putting you in danger over and over again. It takes all his strength not to snap when he sees them beg for your attention, the clear exhaustion on your face as you smile and go along with them, because what else are you supposed to do?
So, at least for Divus, it's not surprising when he hears that you might have found a way home. In fact, it came from your own mouth. It was one of the many after school meetings you had in his classroom, him grading papers as you talked to him, when you revealed what you had found about this mirror in your room.
He wasn't surprised when you told him how exhausted you were, or how badly you missed your world. He was just disappointed, not in you, but himself. It was a strange feeling, he's not used to it honestly, but he wishes he would've done more, provided you a more stable environment, shielded you from this world and its horrors. Instead he and his colleagues let you fend for yourself and now they're paying the price.
Divus would be lying if he said that he wasn't feeling regretful as he thought of everything you were put through. Divus would be lying if he said he wasn't feeling saddened by the thought you were leaving.
But even more so, Divus would be lying if he said he was guilty as he warned Crowley about your plans.
Mozus Trein
Mozus has dealt with children many times in his life. He's been a teacher for a very long time and he's a father of two wonderful daughters. He's dealt with the responsibility of being a role model, a caregiver, a trusted adult for the longest time, but never once has it been as much of a struggle as it was when it came to you. Don't get him wrong, you are a delight, but he was not prepared for everything that would come with you. The drama, the Overblots, the more than obsessed students.
Mozus has learned to deal with it however, and he's come to enjoy his time with you. Some days, when you are with Divus, you'll come to his classroom after hours for tea or chess. You've even started an unofficial book club with him. He hasn't let anyone else join, regardless of how much they beg.
Maybe it's because his daughters are grown, but he enjoys the time he spends with you, being a role model, a caregiver, a trusted adult. He could go without you being in danger every few months, but you were formidable enough.
But to hear whispers of you leaving, it sends a familiar pain in his heart, similar to when his children left for school for the first time. He knows it is wrong to get so attached to you, especially when leaving was always your end goal, but he can't help but feel worried. He brings all these up to you, what happens if this mirror idea of you doesn't work, if you end up somewhere all by yourself, helpless and alone. He doesn't mean to make you worry, but if it keeps you safe, then he doesn't seem to mind.
Ashton Vargas
Admittedly, Ashton doesn't know as much about you as he wishes. You seem to be scared of him, barely looking him in the eye or even interacting with him. It worries him, is there something wrong with you? With him even? What has he done to make you scared?Ashton wants to be like Divus and Mozus, he wants you to look up to him, he wants you to come up to him with worries and concerns, he doesn't want to intimidate you. Ashton tries his best for you, he really does. He makes sure to never overwork you during training, he's always the first to make sure you're okay and receiving the proper care if hurt, and he even reports to the other staff what the behavior of the other students are like, especially concerning you.
Contrary to popular belief, Ashton is more observant than most people assume. He notices when you back away from him in fear, he notices when the other students start acting weird towards you, and he notices when they start to become concerned over the thought of you leaving.
Honestly, Ashton hasn't thought much about you leaving, but now that it's become a hot topic at Night Raven, he's been thinking about it a lot more. Why do you want to leave so bad? What could he--they have done differently? What is your home even like?
Ashton doesn't try to think about it much, even though it eats him up inside. He's worried so much in the past few days about you, but he won't let that change the very minuscule trust you've built with him. Instead, he'll stay to the side, observing and taking in information until the time is right.
Until then, he'll try to remain a good teacher, just for you.
Sam
Sam Is beloved by most students at Night Raven, it probably has to do with the fact that he's not a teacher. Not being a teacher actually comes with a lot of perks, it means the student's trust him more. They're more willing to divulge their secrets to him, talking about their grades or drama in class. It's almost like a game for him, figuring out how to piece together intricately woven stories just from the bits the kids tell him.
Recently though, a lot of these stories seem to revolve around you. It started off with the first years, ranting and raving about a mirror as they shopped for items in his store. The second years were more composed, but there was an anxious aura to them. The third years confirmed that this school wide issue was revolving around you, but he should really be surprised, most things do.
Sam likes you, you have such a vibrant personality, you're kind and respectful. But above everything else you were strong. You've dealt with so much since coming to this school, he's surprised you haven't brought up wanting to leave sooner. While Sam tried not to care, tries to remind himself that this was always going to happen.
Sam tries not to care as you enter his shop, ranting to him about how weird everyone's been acting. He tries not to care as you tell him how busy you are, how you'll be up for hours doing work. He really tries, but all he can think about is you leaving, and what will happen once you do. How everyone else will handle it.
Sam tries not to care, but it's hard when it comes to you.
Crowley
Crowley has tried his best when it comes to you, he genuinely believes that.
He's tried to make sure you had a safe environment, he tried to make sure you were safe. He tried to find you a way home. He honestly did. But in a way, everything got away from him. From the Overblots to the many, many school trips he hasn't had time for much, truely!
But even so, why would you want to go home? If you ignore your life being in danger once a month and the students' strange behavior, life is pretty good here. You have people who care about you, a home that's been recently renovated, and basically anything you could ask for. It was a nice life, so he couldn't understand why Divus was claiming you wanted to leave.
Crowley wonders if he should confront you, tell you off for throwing away everything he's worked to give you. He thought against it however, knowing the response he'd get. Instead he chooses to march up to Ramshackle and demand you rethink all this. He doesn't know what's come over him, you're a magicless human from another world, there wouldn't be much of an issue if you left, for him at least. The other students wouldn't react as well.
Now that Crowley is thinking about it, he doesn't think he wants you to leave. You are a big help when it comes to Overblots and keeping the students at bay, but it's more than that. Crowley has come to enjoy your time here, and he doesn't exactly look forward to you leaving. That's partly why he's taken so long to find you a way home, but you'll never know that.
But to his surprise, you don't know what you're talking about when he shows up. You don't remember anything about leaving or a mirror, and you assume he's here because there's some job he needed you to do. He's--surprised, but he quickly realizes that it's due to a certain student's meddling.
Not that it's anything he should worry about--honestly it just makes his job easier, he would've done the same.
---
A/n: Again sorry if there are out of character, this was difficult.
#yandere x reader#soft yandere#platonic yandere#twisted wonderland x reader#yandere twisted wonderland#twisted wonderland#twst x reader#twst#yandere twst
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Mama y Papa
Carlos Sainz x Reader x Lando Norris
Warnings: my grammar😻, sickness and fluff
Words: around 4k I think
A/n: I am so sorry I was gone for a month but girlie was sick and wanted to spend time with her friends and family🤞🏼
Y/N was talking to Carmen about life you know? Work, their relationships, family, etc.
It was a pretty deep conversation until they heard "Y/nnnnn?"
Of course, it was Lando asking his 'grid mum' for something to help him with, which was no problem from her side but when she saw Lando holding a bottle of water and looking a bit annoyed, she couldn't help but chuckle.
"Oh, Lando what's wrong?" Carmen asked smiling knowing that the 2 had a mother/son bond that will never be broken.
"I can't open the bottle and I couldn't find Carlos" Lando answered Carmen. "Hand me the bottle darling" Y/N said while waiting for Lando to give her the bottle. She opened it like nothing and handed it back to him, "There you go" Lando just looked at the bottle for a few seconds and then took it, "Thank you Y/N" "No problem Lando"
----
It was around 1 am when Y/N found herself looking at the wall cursing herself out for drinking coffee at 7 pm. At least Carlos is having the time of his life sleeping and clinging to her body.
She was snapped out of her thoughts when somebody decided to call her. She only wondered, who the hell would want to call at this hour? Surprisingly it was Lando, she went into an instant worry in seconds and picked up almost immediately.
"Lando, are you okay?" The worry in her voice was incredible because people wouldn't worry like that when their friends called at night, well that was not the case for Y/N and Carlos Sainz.
"Can you pick me up? I'm near the coffee shop you like and it's freezing and I don't have a jacket or a sweatshirt" Lando answered her, "I'll be there" She hung up the phone a started to wake Carlos up. "Carlos, wake up! Carlos!" once he did wake up he asked his wife "What's wrong mi amor?"
"It's Lando" and that sentence was all it took for Carlos to fully wake up. "Well, why are you still laying in bed? Let's go" Carlos hurried his wife out of bed because if something would happen to Lando he wouldn't survive it. He promised himself that he would take care of him the second he met him.
---
It was the day after the British GP and Lando wasn’t feeling well, was it because he went out clubbing to celebrate? Probably yes.
He tried calling Carlos and Y/N but they weren't picking up, that was the moment Lando accepted his fate. He had to go through the pain alone. Until a miracle happened. Carlos called back.
"Lando, are you okay?" Carlos asked curious, "No, I feel horrible and I've been throwing up" Lando admitted, "You've been what?" it was Y/N's time to ask Lando questions, "Have you taken any sort of medication? You know what, we'll go to the pharmacy and grocery shop so I can make you soup okay?"
Y/N told Lando the plan she created in seconds because there was no way she would let Lando deal with it by himself. Carlos hung up the phone and followed his wife asking her more questions like 'What do we need?' type of questions.
20 minutes later the couple was in Lando's apartment. Y/N made some soup while Carlos had Lando laying in his lap talking to him on the couch. "Lando you will take this after you eat okay?" Y/N showed him the medicine, "Mhm" he answered with this tired tone to his voice which Carlos or Y/N didn't like.
Lando fell asleep on Carlos' lap, and the couple was now having this genuine conversation. "He's like a few years younger than us but acts like a teenager" Y/N couldn't help but chuckle at the last part, "Oy mi amor, he's our son at this point no?" and Carlos was right "Our firstborn!" Y/N added.
---
Carlos, Y/N decided to take Lando with them for their vacation. They decided to visit New Zealand first, and after that, Carlos and Y/N will be going on a big family vacation to Ibiza.
They went to a restaurant because they got hungry and when they arrived Y/N was ready for this;
"Y/N can you please order for me?" Lando asked politely, "Tell me what you want to eat then". "This pasta and this mixed drink please" Lando pointed at the menu while telling Y/N his order, Carlos just sat back and quietly enjoyed the moment because even though Lando is old enough to be enjoying life on his own, he would rather spend it with the people he idolizes. Carlos and Y/N Sainz.
#f1 x reader#formula one x reader#formula 1 x reader#lando norris x female reader#lando norris x you#lando norris x y/n#lando norris x reader#carlos sainz x reader#carlos sainz x you#carlos sainz x female reader#carlos sainz x y/n#f1 x female reader#f1 x you#f1 x y/n
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hotch hiring spencer to tutor his (college aged) daughter, and hes so impressed with how much theyve been studying and how hes helped her grades, until one day he walks in on one of their "study sessions," but they're not really studying at all.....
Aaron knew there'd be no better person to turn to than Dr. Spencer Reid when his daughter began struggling with her college course load. You're having trouble studying efficiently, you spend so much time at your desk scribbling down ineffective notes that you forget to eat, sleep, and take care of yourself. He's worried about you, his heart aches for his baby girl, so he asks Spencer to start coming over on Saturdays to help you.
It works great. Not only do your grades skyrocket, but your mood does too, no longer sullen from having no free time or sleep schedule. You're back to your old self, maybe even happier now, and Aaron can't hold back the smile on his face as he ascends the stairs, an array of your favorite snacks in hand.
Spencer's inhumanly obsessed with cheez-its, and your own snack of choice is held in his other hand. He thinks the least he can do to thank Spencer is feed the man, seeing as he's so skinny sometimes his snug sweater vests are loose. You swing the door shut during your study sessions, at Aaron's own request, because he couldn't hear the television downstairs over the sound of your chatter. He doesn't think to knock, he's sure the creaking of your door's old hinges will be enough of a sound to break you out of your study stupor.
"Y/N, Spencer, I brought- oh my god."
Your dad's voice nearly goes down a full octave, sending your stomach swirling. He speaks low when he's mad, and watching you scramble out of Spencer's lap and straighten your wrinkled top, you're sure he's livid.
"I- uh, Hotch," Spencer babbles, but you smack the back of his hand to get him to shut up. He runs his fingers through his hair instead, combing out the strands that you'd mussed while licking over his bottom lip.
"Dad!" You chime, "Um- I'm sorry, we- I didn't know you'd come in. We just- we were studying, but then, I- I got distracted, really, it wasn't Spencer's fault, we- I just- I-"
"Stop." Aaron shuts his eyes, snack bags now shoved carelessly onto your bedside table as your dad brings a hand to his face. You're sure this is scarier than any situation Spencer's ever faced before, including aggravated unsubs and near-shootings.
Your dad buries his face in his hand, one large enough to cover his features. It's almost scarier not seeing his stern face; you wonder if his eyes are glowing red.
"Hotch- sir, I'm so sorry." Spencer tries again, and your dad holds up his free hand to silence him. He doesn't need to be told twice, or- thrice, and he closes his mouth.
"How long have you two been doing this?" He asks, muffled by his hand in front of his face.
"Only two weeks. Or- Saturdays, only two days. Just- this time, and, uh, the last time."
"It started last week?"
"Yes." You confirm, nodding even if he can't see.
"Are you studying?"
"Yes." You promise, smoothing out a rumpled study guide and hoping he can't hear it, "Uh- this is our- well, my break."
"Fantastic." Your dad drawls, finally dragging his palm down his face and looking you dead in the eyes. It looks like it almost hurts him to do so, and you feel residual pain in your stomach, churning away again.
"I suppose there are worse people you could be doing that with." He muses carefully, "Though I wish you weren't doing it at all. But you're in college."
"I am," You nod.
"And you're an adult."
"I am."
"And I can't tell you what to do anymore."
You stay silent, not wanting to push your luck.
"Okay. There's nothing I can do," He decides, face still more stoic than when he'd entered, intent on giving you snacks. If he'd had known you'd been eating Spencer's face, he would have saved them for later.
"Don't do it here." He pleads, "At least not while I'm here. And- and while I'm here," He warns, looking at Spencer this time, "This door stays open. Understand?"
"Yes, dad." You nod, and Spencer echoes it with 'sir' as a replacement.
"Study." Aaron narrows his eyes at the both of you, pointedly jamming the door stop beneath the door until it's practically punching a hole through the wall where the knob hits, "If your grades drop again, this is over."
"Yes, dad." You call again, waiting until he storms off down the stairs to even breathe in Spencer's direction.
"Oh my god," Spencer groans, burying his face in his hands, "Oh my god, that was- that was awful."
"He didn't say no!" You point out, grinning at the blushy man beside you, "That went, like, a thousand times better than I was expecting."
"At least I don't have to hide it anymore. Do you know how hard it was for me to pretend I wasn't putting the moves on his daughter while we were in Dallas this past week?"
"I know how hard it was to pretend I wasn't tonguing his agent during dinner last night," You shrug, grinning at Spencer who looks like he's not quite ready to be relieved yet, "No more secrets for either of us, pretty boy."
#spencer reid#spencer reid x reader#spencer reid imagine#spencer reid scenario#spencer reid oneshot#spencer reid one-shot#spencer reid one shot#spencer reid headcanons#spencer reid headcanon#spencer reid hc#spencer reid hcs#spencer reid fanfiction#spencer reid fanfic#spencer reid fic#spencer reid blurb#spencer reid drabble#spencer reid dialogue#spencer reid fluff#spencer reid x reader fanfiction#aaron hotchner x daughter!reader#hotchner!reader
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Wounded Love
Summary: Astarion and Tav are both struggling with their emotions as they journey through the Shadowlands. When Astarion gets injured, Tav takes it upon herself to nurse him back to health, in more ways than one.
Pairing: Astarion x Fem!Reader.
Word Count: 5.3k
Tags: Astarion gets hurt, Emotional Constipation, Unresolved Romantic Tension, Massage, Masturbation, Oral Sex, Tav takes care of Astarion, sub!Atarion, Light Dom/sub, bordering minimal really, Porn With Plot, Biting, Blood.
a/n: this is an old draft, so forgive me if there are any typos! Love ya🤍
WARNING! +18 CONTENT, MINORS DNI
It had been a stray hex, a capricious twist of magic that had hurt him, as told by the doctor responsible for his care in the Last Light Inn. The tendrils of the hex had woven an intricate spell, rendering him unconscious. Right now, as his chest rises and falls rhythmically, you feel something like pain and protectiveness stir in your chest. Although you are aware that your connection is currently purely physical, you can't help but feel a flutter every time your eyes meet or a tightening in your chest whenever he faces danger.
Looking at his peaceful sleeping form, you reach out to touch his hair, keeping it out of the way of his eyes. Your fingers trace the contours of his face and down his jawline. You wonder what kind of dreams come to him in these tender moments. Dreams you would love to share. To know all the things that go through the elf's mind.
His eyes suddenly open, and you get slightly startled, your hand hanging mid-air.
"What are you doing?" He raises one judging eyebrow, and squints at you through his eyelashes, but doesn't move out of your touch. His lips are curled into a small, tight grimace, probably still in pain from his recent wound.
You reach for the mug of water near the bed. "You look so peaceful when you sleep. Maybe you should spend more time like that. I like you way more when you are quiet," you say, a teasing tone lacing your words.
Astarion rolls his eyes, but he's also smiling a little.
"Yeah? Well, if you're so keen on me sleeping why not do me a favor and knock me out? The pain is unbearable as of right now," he says, but his voice is still soft and quiet, almost as if talking is painful You know there is a bit of truth there. He takes the mug and gulps down the water, then sets the piece back down on the bedside table.
He does appear miserable, even though his beauty remains as striking as ever. His eyes, usually filled with energy and mirth, seem drained of life, carrying heavy bags underneath. Though he is already pale, right now he looks paler than ever, and even his distinctive white locks, typically immaculate, fall disheveled and unkempt over his shoulders.
Your chest tightens at the sight, a vivid flashback of watching him fall during the combat flooding your mind. One moment, he was bravely battling alongside Karlach and the next, he was sprawled on the ground, so unnaturally still that it hinted at something had gone fatally wrong. The memory of that moment lingers—the scream tearing from your throat, the frantic dash to reach him—where the world outside, the lurking shadow monsters, and your companions; all became a blur, drowned out by the overwhelming fear of losing him.
You release a shaky breath, and try to appear nonchalant "Well, I happened to leave my Warhammer outside, but if you give me a moment, we could arrange it," you say, a hint of playful sarcasm masking the genuine worry beneath.
Astarion snorts. "Please, I don't need the Warhammer. Just a firm slap should do it." He says while shifting on his bed.
The movement makes the bedsheets rustle and reveals the bandages encasing his torso. His chest had sustained the most damage, with a deep cut that refused to heal and oozed a dark, murky liquid.
"You were out for a tenday," you inform him. "A stray hex hit you during combat and left you out cold. The wound didn't close, even with your vampiric and elf powers, so it had to be taken care of manually."
"Well, that's just great." Astarion mutters. Then, he speaks up again, this time seemingly with some concern, "I'm alright, right? I'm not going to die? I mean, I know I can't die, but..."
You chuckle softly at his words, a mix of fondness and relief washing over you. "Not under my watch. I am an incredible healer, after all".
"And quite humble, at that," Astarion mutters, but there is a small smile on his face. Then, there is a beat of silence, as both of you take a moment to collect your thoughts.
Astarion's smile fades, and his eyes search yours for something, a reassurance perhaps. You can see the vulnerability hidden beneath his usual facade of confidence and charm. It's rare to see him like this, stripped of his usual bravado. Leaning closer, you reach out again to gently brush a strand of white hair behind his pointy ear.
"Hey," you say softly, placing your hand on his cheek. "You're going to be alright. We took care of your wounds, and Halsin says you just need some time to recover." You take a deep breath, trying to steady yourself as you reach out and gently grasp his hand, intertwining your fingers. "You scared me, you know," you admit softly. "Seeing you fall like that... I thought I had lost you."
Astarion seems to freeze in place at that, as if he is unsure of how to react. You chuckle nervously, realizing you may have unintentionally crossed an unspoken boundary. Emotions are not your forte, after all. For a moment he simply stares at your intertwined hands. Then, he looks up to meet your gaze, and you see a flicker of some unreadable emotion there.
"Lost me? Come now, you should know by now it takes more than a measly hex to finish me off." His tone aims for nonchalance, but there is an edge to it that gives away his vulnerability. You offer a small, sheepish smile.
"Yes, well, you didn't die. So quit that moping and drink your water, or I'll let Shadowheart take a crack at healing you."
"From my point of view, this just means you just have to keep a closer eye on me from now on,"
You let out a small sigh and give him an exasperated look "I think I have done my fair share of caring for some time."
A look of realization crosses his face as if a puzzle piece has finally fallen into place. "Wait, did you stay here for the entire tenday?" he murmurs, his eyes widening with surprise and curiosity.
You clear your throat awkwardly "I mean, you were unconscious. Somebody had to keep guard, keep tabs on you, change your bandages..." you say, with a casual wave of your hand "Plus, I wanted to make sure you were alright. I'm not a complete monster."
But you are aware that it's not the whole truth. The real reason is that the thought of him lying in bed, wounded and vulnerable, causes a pain in your chest that you don't want to acknowledge.
Astarion's eyes widen slightly at your words, surprise mingling with something else. Gratitude, perhaps? It's hard to tell with him sometimes, but there's a softness in his gaze that tells you he appreciates your presence more than he lets on.
"Well, I suppose I should thank you then," he says, his voice softer than before. "I wouldn't have expected you to stick around."
You shrug nonchalantly "Had to make sure you didn't get yourself killed again," You reply teasingly, attempting to lighten the mood.
Astarion chuckles a sound that warms your chest. "Ah, so it was purely for selfish reasons then."
"Of course, can't have our token charming vampire biting the dust just yet"
Astarion rolls his eyes, a smile on his face "Charming vampire, am I? You really know just how to flatter someone."
"You're also our only rogue," you reply.
Astarion smiles. "So not only am I charming, but I'm essential too. Guess the group just couldn't do without me. Perhaps you should write me a thank you note instead."
You raise an eyebrow, a smirk playing at the corners of your lips. "Oh, don't worry. I'll be sure to draft up a heartfelt ode to your indispensability."
His smile widens, the playful back and forth easing the tension that lingered between you. It feels good to see him like this, even if he's still recovering from his injuries.
You've been through so much together, fighting against the darkness that threatens your world. And in those moments of battle and chaos, there's a strange comfort in he familiarity of this banter, with its playful jabs and sly remarks. You do this routine a hundred times, dancing around each other's feelings and skirting the edges of any true intimacy. And yet, it's still nice to pretend sometimes. Still nice to pretend there's nothing underneath all the playful words, that maybe this is all you need. But for once, when you are looking at him, you want to reach out to him. To tenderly kiss his forehead, rest your head on his strong shoulders, and be enveloped in his embrace and not just for physical pleasure. But you know better than to act on those desires. He has been so wounded in the past and it's not just the physical scars that linger. His past is a complicated web of pain, betrayal, and mistrust. You've seen the way his eyes darken when certain topics are brought up or how he flinches away from certain touches. So you will wait patiently until he opens up when he is ready, relishing in these small moments in the meantime.
"Well, charming vampire, it looks like I'll have to find some more enemies for you to sink your fangs into for breakfast," you say with a mischievous glint in your eyes.
Astarion grins, a little wolfishly with his fangs on display, "Oh, I think I know just who to take my fangs to," he says, his eyes appraising your neck.
You feel a shiver run down your spine at the intensity of his gaze. You roll your eyes and smirk. "Oh please, Astarion. I'm not that easy to sink your fangs into."
He leans forward, with a wicked smile on his lips "Oh, is that so?" Astarion says smoothly. A twinkle of desire flashes in his red eyes as he speaks, which only ignites your own thirst. You feel your heartbeat quickening, breath hitching in your chest. "You want to put that to the test?" His voice is lower now, a bit of a growl starting to creep into his tone.
You can feel the bed's cool, smooth sheets against your skin as you lean forward, your chest brushing against Astarion's. The energy between your bodies feels like a tangible force, one that you can almost reach out and touch. His face is so close, his red eyes bright and mouth slightly open, showing off two sharp fangs that would terrify most people but only send shivers of anticipation down your spine. There's something primal in the way you're looking at each other, and you can't help but feel a familiar wave of excitement and fear wash over you. Astarion's eyes flicker to your lips for a moment. You are waiting, wanting him to make the first move, your breath shallow and quick.
"Well? Still think you can bite me that easily?" you quip, teasingly, although your heart is pounding so loud you are sure it's deafening for him.
A mischievous smirk plays on Astarion's lips, his red eyes sparkling with amusement. Despite his injury, he moves gracefully and with supernatural quickness, catching you off guard. In the blink of an eye, you are pinned to the bed beneath him. Your back sinks into the soft mattress as Astarion's weight presses down on your body. His left arm is pressing into the skin of your collarbones, as his other hand holds your wrists above your head. Every touch from him sends electric jolts through your body.
Astarion's breath is hot against your skin as he leans in closer, his lips grazing your ear. "Oh, I am more than capable of biting you," he whispers, his voice husky with desire. "I might even leave you with a few bruises," he adds, his voice an intimate rasp that sends shivers down your spine.
Your heart races at his words and the thought of what he could do to you, at the weight pressing down on you.
"You'd like that, wouldn't you?" Astarion murmurs against your skin, his lips trailing down your neck and leaving a trail of fire in their wake.
You let out a soft gasp as he nibbles on your skin, causing goosebumps to rise along your arms. His touch is electric and every nerve in your body feels like it's on fire. Without hesitation, Astarion's fangs sink into the soft flesh of your neck, and you let out a gasp as a mix of pleasure and sharp icy pain courses through you. You can feel yourself growing lightheaded as he feeds from you, his fangs sinking deeper and his grip on your wrists loosening as he savors the taste of your blood. The sensation sends waves of ecstasy coursing through your veins.
Time seems to stand still as you remain locked in his embrace, your bodies tangled together on the bed. As he finally withdraws his fangs from your neck, he lingers for a moment, his lips brushing against the wounds he's left behind. You can feel the slight throbbing where his teeth had punctured skin seconds ago. A soft sigh escapes your lips as you feel him press his forehead against yours, his breath fanning against your skin.
You giggle a little, still coming down from the high of vampire venom.
"I will never get tired of that," The words slipped from his lips in a breathy murmur, one that was filled with awe and contentment.
"All it takes is a little blood to make our wounded vampire happy," You tease, giving him a small peck. His lips still taste a bit metallic, but you don't care in the slightest.
Astarion chuckles, "Ah, darling, we both know I am not the only one who enjoys that…"
He presses his body against your own, his lips suddenly ravishing yours with an intensity that steals your breath. The heat of his mouth sears through you, igniting every nerve and sending primal shivers down your spine. You cling to him desperately, wrapping your arms around his neck and pulling him closer until your bodies meld into one and your hands tangle in the soft curls of his hair. At this moment, nothing else exists except for the electric chemistry between you, overwhelming and all-consuming.
Out of nowhere, he recoils and lets out a sharp hiss. Concerned, you examine the bandage on his chest and notice a small black spot forming. "Oh shit," you curse under your breath.
You quickly slide out from under him and stand next to the bed. "Lie down," you tell him firmly, "I'll take care of it."
"I'm okay," Astarion lies, but complies, lying down on the bed with a sense of resignation. The soft sheets crinkle beneath his weight as he settles into a comfortable position. You hurriedly gather supplies before returning to his side, adrenaline and concern fueling your actions. With skilled hands, you begin tending to his wound as Astarion watches on with curious eyes.
"If you keep ogling me like that, I may just end up with a hole in my head," you quip.
The corners of both your mouths turn up in matching grins. The intensity of your gaze locks and it feels like the air is alive with electricity. With precision and care, you unwrap the bandage and clean the wound, hands steady despite your worry. As you finish dressing the wound, you can't help letting out a sigh of relief after realizing it was just a small tear, nothing too serious.
It's then that you notice you have been straddling his body over the crisp white sheets of the hospital bed and your cheeks flush furiously.
Astarion looks at you with a cheeky smirk, "Something the matter, dear?" he asks, his voice low and sultry.
You can feel your face turning even brighter red, but you try to shrug it off. "No, nothing's wrong."
Astarion lets out a low laugh, enjoying your flustered state. "Oh, I beg to differ," he teases, sitting up and leaning against the headboard.
"Shut up," you mutter, trying to keep your embarrassment at bay.
Astarion chuckles softly, a warm sound that makes your heart flutter. Why does he always make your heart flutter?
"Well, I have seen you in way more compromised positions than the one you are in right now," he says, a hint of mischief in his tone. "You're not one to be shy."
You can't help but blush even more at his words. His hand starts caressing your thigh, and your breath hitches slightly.
"I must say," Astarion continues with a sly grin, "I've never had such skilled hands tending to me before."
You roll your eyes at his flirting. "Well, I have been trained in basic care since I was young," you reply with a smile playing on your lips.
He raises an eyebrow in surprise. "And how else are you planning on taking care of me, exactly? Because I remain deeply wounded." he says with a mock pout.
A mischievous smirk tugs at the corners of your mouth as you reply, "You'll just have to wait and see."
Meeting his intense gaze, you can feel the heat rising to your cheeks. A sudden spark of inspiration ignites within you and you eagerly suggest, "How about a massage? I have been told I am really good at those."
He raises an eyebrow, "A massage, huh? It doesn't sound too bad."
A chuckle bubbles up from your chest and you swat him lightly on the shoulder. "Only 'not too bad'? I'll have you know, I'm excellent."
Astarion smirks, "Prove it then," he challenges, stretching back onto the bed, arms folded behind his head in a display of pure ease.
Squaring your shoulders in determination, you stand from the bed and walk to the other side of the room. You rummage through a drawer filled with various herbs and oils until you find what you're looking for - a small vial of calming lavender oil you had seen Halsin storing a few days ago. You just hope he won't miss it too much.
"You better not fall asleep on me," you call out teasingly as you make your way back towards him, shaking the vial in your hand for emphasis.
In response, Astarion chuckles lowly and flips onto his stomach without a word, waiting for your touch. The scent of lavender fills the room as you rub your hands together, warming up the oil before applying it to his skin.
As your hands start kneading into his tight shoulder muscles, he releases a sigh that is half groan, half purr. "Your touch is simply divine," he moans, his voice low and husky. "You really do possess a gift for caressing."
With a proud smile, you continue to massage his shoulders and neck, feeling the tension ease away. His eyes are closed, lost in the pleasure of the moment. Your heart swells with happiness to see him so content and relaxed.
You lower your hands slowly, massaging along the curve of his spine and drawing another low moan from him. The rhythm of your touch, the scent of lavender, and the quiet of the room come together to create a sense of calm and tranquility. You let your fingers brush against the edges of his scars, caressing them tenderly. Instead of flinching away, he leans into your touch, allowing you to continue your gentle exploration.
You continue to knead his muscles, working out any remaining knots and tension. And then, you lower your head and press a soft kiss to the bare skin of his shoulder, right above the bandage. Astarion lets out a surprised gasp at the unexpected touch of your lips. He turns his head slightly, his eyes opening to meet yours.
"Can't resist taking advantage, can you?" he teases with a small grin.
"I simply relish having you at my mercy for once," you whisper against his spine, taking in the sweet scent of lavender oil on his skin.
Astarion's lips curve into a playful smirk at your words. "Oh, do you now?" he asks in a husky voice, his eyes sparkling with mischief.
You nod confidently, trailing light kisses down his spine and leaving a trail of goosebumps in their wake. "I always enjoy being in control," you reply, your tone laced with teasing.
He lets out a low chuckle, "And I always relish when you take charge," he purrs, his eyes closing in satisfaction.
With a last kiss, you gently pat his side.
"Now you turn for me."
Astarion eagerly flips onto his back, his eyes shining with anticipation. As you straddle him, you notice he has been affected by your previous ministrations, his hardness pressing against your core. A triumphant smile tugs at your lips. Astarion merely smirks up at you, not bothering to hide his interest.
"Seems like your skills extend beyond basic care," he teases, his voice dropping to a husky whisper.
You choose to ignore his comment and instead focus on the task at hand. Pouring more lavender oil onto your hands, you begin to knead his pectoral muscles, applying firm and steady pressure, avoiding the bandage covering it. Your hands roam over his chest with practiced ease until they find their way to his abdomen. You glide your fingers over each taut muscle, taking delight in the way his body responds under your touch.
"Enjoying yourself?" Astarion teases with a smirk.
A warm rush of joy spreads through you as you trace your fingers along the curves of his navel, softly giggling. His hands instinctively tighten around your hips, a desperate attempt to regain some control of the situation. A sly, self-satisfied smirk spreads across your lips as you slowly slip your hand lower down, teasing the sensitive skin just beneath the waistband of his trousers, towards the source of his growing excitement.
His breath hitches at your touch, his eyes now wide with surprise. "Oh, I see what's happening here," he says, a teasing smile playing on his lips. "You're getting into this caretaker role, aren't you?"
Your smirk deepens as you gently massage his hips, ignoring the suggestive implications of his words.
"I did say I'd take good care of you, didn't I?" you reply nonchalantly, as I continue with my performance.
Astarion lets out a soft chuckle and reaches up to cup your cheek affectionately.
"You certainly did," he murmurs, gazing up at you in admiration. "But what about you? Who takes care of you, dear?" he mumbles.
Your heart fills with sadness, at the thought of him only thinking of sex as an exchange, more than a pleasurable thing. You lean in to press a soft kiss into his neck, feeling his skin cold under your touch.
"Just trust me," you whisper, voice low and sultry, "I want to make you feel good." His breath hitches again, and you can feel him growing harder beneath your touch. "Trust me," you repeat softly.
You press your lips against his, softly at first, then deeper as he responds with equal fervor. Your hand swiftly opens his trousers, digging inside to grab his hardness, and starts a rhythmic movement, gliding up and down the full length of his member. As it reaches the tip, you twist your wrist slightly, eliciting a whine from deep within his chest. It's a sound you've never heard from him before, one that sends shivers down your and makes your core throb.
His body tenses beneath you, the feeling of your hand wrapped around him drawing a low curse from his lips. He arches into your touch, his grip on your hips tightening as he struggles to remain composed. He presses his lips against yours, the kiss becoming more fervent and demanding. His hands grip your hips tightly, pulling you closer to him, as if he can't get enough.
"Easy," you coo softly against his ear, an intimate tone wrapped around the single word as if it were a promise. Astarion's hands flex on your hips repeatedly, fingers digging into your flesh in a bid to ground himself. "Let me take good care of you," you assure him again, your voice low and breathy against his skin. His body tenses under your touch as he lets out a groan.
His breaths come in ragged gasps, punctuated by small moans of pleasure. "Faster," he pleads with a desperation that ignites a fire within you.
"My beautiful baby, so good for me," you murmur into his ear, your voice rough with desire and adoration. Without hesitation, you bring the pointed tip of his ear between your lips, savoring the delicate contours as you run your tongue along its edges. His body shudders in response, a high whine escaping from his throat as he gives in to your touch.
"Oh, sweet hells," he breathes, his voice barely a whisper.
You release his ear and lay back to take a good look at him, and you smile to yourself when you see his disveleshed hair, and red eyes hooded. And then, without hesitation, you sink down between his parted legs as your lips part and encircle his throbbing member. The taste of him fills your mouth, a mixture of salt and skin and something uniquely his. You take him fully into your mouth, relishing the sounds of his moans and gasps as you move your lips up and down his length. You swirl your tongue around him, teasing and coaxing every delicious sensation from him. His hips thrust upward, and his hands grip your hair, pulling you closer, but you resist, teasing him with your tongue. Your own body is humming with need and desire, but you push it aside to focus completely on him.
You slowly remove him from your mouth, teasingly drawing out the moment. "Beg for me," you whisper seductively, reveling in the power you hold over him.
Astarion's breath hitches as you pull away, and he meets your eyes with a mix of surprise and desire. He moans a deep, guttural sound that vibrates through you, and his hips buck upward, thrusting into the air. His hardness stands tall and proud against your palm, straining for release. It’s slick with your spit, and with a reddish hue that reveals his recent feeding. So damn beautiful.
"Please," he pleads "Please, please," he tries to repeat, but his words come out in a garbled, unintelligible moan as you take him deep into your throat and swallow hard, feeling his member pulse and throb slightly in your mouth.
His entire body trembles, his breaths quickening to the point where they are almost non-existent. His hands clamp onto your hair, yanking you towards him with a savage strength as he thrusts relentlessly, pushing himself deeper and deeper inside of you until it feels like he might tear you apart.
"Oh gods," he cries, arching his back and groaning in a way that makes you want to keep going. "That's so good, hells."
His words only drive you further, and you begin to pick up the pace, slobbering and sucking on him like a starving man to a feast. His body tenses as his release approaches, and you can feel him pulsing in your mouth.
"Please, please, oh my god" His words are now a jumbled mess, spewing out of his mouth in a frenzied stream. His eyes roll back into his head, a sign that he is close to releasing everything he has been holding in. "I can't... I can't take much more," he whispers hoarsely, "Please, please, let me cum. Fuck, I need to cum."
With this plea, you can feel the surge of his release, and your body responds with an exhilaration that threatens to overwhelm you. You can feel your body responding to his, your own arousal growing, and you rub yourself through your clothes, imagining the feel of him inside you. But that can wait - right now he needs you to take care of him. It's clear he's getting close now - his breaths are shallow, his moans low and desperate, his hips thrusting upwards in short, sharp jerks. With a final cry, you feel him tense, his entire body convulsing under your touch. You swallow hard, feeling the hot liquid spurt into your mouth, coating your tongue and throat in his essence. You can't help but groan in pleasure as it fills you, and you continue to suck and slurp, greedily devouring every drop he has to offer. His hips thrust upwards, bucking wildly as wave after wave of pleasure washed over him. You continue to suck and stroke him, milking every last drop from his throbbing length.
Finally, he goes lax, his body slack and exhausted while his breath comes in ragged gasps. You gently remove his now limp member from your mouth, wiping the remnants of him from the corners with your thumb. As he comes down from his high, his body relaxes onto the pillow, a satisfied smile playing on his lips. You lay next to him, your heart filled with a sense of contentment and satisfaction. You trace patterns on his chest with your fingertips, feeling the rise and fall of his breaths as he continues to recover from his release.
A spark ignites in his eyes as they lock onto yours, and for the first time, you see a glimmer of something. There is a tenderness and adoration in his gaze as if you are the most precious and captivating being in all of Faerûn. You smile and sprawl over his healthy shoulder, looking up at him.
"And here I thought I was the master at lovemaking," he teases. "Ever so surprising, my dear."
"Oh, you're easy to please, my love. But I do admit, you taste absolutely divine." You giggle and place a soft kiss on his lips.
He chuckles deeply, running his fingers through your hair. A moment of silence passes between you before you find the courage to break it with a quiet question, "Did you truly enjoy it?"
Conversation after sex is rare for you, but something about today feels different, almost intimate. Like something has shifted, an unspoken understanding or connection.
There is a pause, and Astarion looks at you, seeming a bit awkward. He appears to be having some sort of internal struggle at the moment. But then, he relaxes a bit and nods his head.
"Yes, I did," he says. He smiles at you. "It was... mediocre. Which is quite good for your usual performance"
You raise an eyebrow in mock offense. "Excuse me? You were practically begging me to cum moments ago!"
"Was that begging?" he asks innocently, "I thought I was just doing a demonstration" His eyes twinkled with amusement as he looked at you, his lips curling up into a smirk.
"Oh, really?" You raise an eyebrow playfully. "Well, you sure seemed to be enjoying it"
Astarion chuckled lightly, running his fingers through your hair. "I suppose I did, you know me, I can't resist a good show. And in case you're wondering, that was definitely begging. You just have a unique way of making me forget my manners."
You snuggle closer to him, basking in the softness of his skin. "I'm glad I can keep things interesting for you."
And then, to your surprise, he silently embraces you in a warm hug, pulling you close to his chest. The feeling of his strong arms encircling your frame is unfamiliar but comforting at the same time. You have never held each other in such an intimate way before, but in this moment it feels like the most natural thing in the world.
As the two of you lay intertwined and content, you can feel a sense of peace wash over both of you. For once, no worries or fears are clouding your minds - just the simple pleasure of being together in this moment. You close your eyes and let out a satisfied sigh, wondering if this newfound closeness is a sign of things to come, and the thought brings a smile to your lips, before drifting off into a peaceful sleep wrapped in each other's embrace.
#baldur's gate 3#bg3#bg3 fanfic prompt#baldurs gate 3#bg3 tav#astarion x tav#baldurs gate fanfiction#astarion ancunin#bg3 fanfiction#astarion baldurs gate#astarion fanfic#astarion x reader
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Okay, I've had this idea bouncing around in my head, waiting for you to reopen suggestions, haha. How do you think the Origins Companions + Halsin, Rolan, Dammon, and Zevlor would react if they found out that Tav had been hiding a very serious injury from them? The kind of injury where Tav is convinced that they're fine and they don't want to worry anyone with something they can handle on their own, especially the people they care most for, but as they try to ignore the injury it only gets worse until it's potentially life threatening and they can't keep up the facade anymore. I will leave it up to you whether or not Tav and the other individual are in a romantic relationship. I think both ways have potential for wonderful angst 😆
ooohhh noooooo! but also oh yes, LOVE this sort of angst lol. written as if you have had an infection come on from an injury. this is gonna be a long list so let's buckle up...
Astarion
really tries to hide his panic but fails miserably.
can't help but start snapping - how could you keep something like this from him?
you try to give your excuses but he waves them away, angry, but mostly because he's terrified that he might have lost you.
if he has any healing potions he helps you take them, if he doesn't he immediately... sources some from somewhere.
holds you as tight as he dares, worried that he will aggravate the injury otherwise.
as you begin to heal and drift off to sleep he spends the whole night watching you rest, making sure that you're still breathing, still safe. doesn't mind when you cuddle up to him in the night, sleepily.
Gale
curses himself for not noticing your condition. he's a wizard, damn it! he's meant to be bloody perceptive.
wishes for the first time ever that he didn't just know wizard spells. wishes he knew how to heal, too.
makes you as comfortable as he can while he finds a book about what he can do for an infected wound, probably swallowing his pride and going to Shadowheart if it's bad enough.
you manage a weak, "Gale, you don't have to--", and he cuts you off, "if you're going to insist that I don't have to look after you, I'm telling you that I do."
fixes you something to help with the pain and infection, makes sure you drink it all despite the horrid taste, then tucks you into his bedroll to let you rest.
when you go to reach out and cuddle him he slips into your arms, presses his lips to your hair, and whispers as you fall asleep about how much you scared him. about how he'd never be able to lose you.
Lae'zel
only realises how unwell you are when you fall over mid-journey.
"tsk'va! why did you hide the extent of your injuries from me?"
hauls you onto her back and carries you back to camp, muttering about your foolishness the whole time.
makes you comfortable in her tent and uses her knowledge of githyanki medicine to help start healing you.
it isn't comfortable as she works on your infection but for the first time you feel her hands being soft rather than vicious.
"you should not have kept this from me." "I know. I'm sorry." "hm. ridiculous thing. zhak vo'n'fynh duj."
goes and intimidates the camp into being quiet so you can rest. it works. this is the nicest she's ever been to you. you could get used to it.
Shadowheart
obviously this is not a huge problem for her, but she is still worried that it got so far without her noticing.
immediately heals you, pouring far too many spell slots into your body in order to get it up and running again.
it helps, immediately breaking the fever you've been nursing, and the touch of Shadowheart's hand to your face is cooling and reassuring.
"lady shar teaches us to embrace our pain... but not like this. you should have known better. you could have died."
her hand slips down to cup your cheek, you cover it with one of your own. she's telling you off but you can tell it's because she cares.
"I'm sorry that I scared you." "I know. don't do it again."
she smiles and the ache in your heart is lifted, too.
Wyll
panics.
you collapse on day in camp and he immediately calls on the others for help, not so proud as to be unable to admit when something is out of his knowledge. he is not a healer. he needs help.
he manages to catch you in his arms as you tumble, hugging you close to his chest while magic is worked or a healer checks you over.
lets out a breath he didn't realise he was holding when you begin to stabilise.
helps you back to your tent to rest, gently chiding you but letting you know that he's glad you're alright.
when your hand weakly comes up to touch him, he indulges you in a kiss to let you know how relieved he is.
constantly watching you on the battlefield from that moment on. if he can help it, you'll never be hurt again.
Karlach
another panicker.
scoops you up in her arms and holds you to her chest, running to the tent of the nearest healer in camp - or, if you're in the city, kicking down the door of a local doctor.
begging the healer to check you over, but is reluctant to let you go. if she stops holding you it's like she's relinquishing control and that scares the life out of her.
you're healed and she feels you start to stir in her arms, peppering you with kisses of relief, choking through her tears that you're never to scare her like that again.
carries you back home, even if you're totally capable of walking. she just wants to make sure you're okay.
Halsin
sternly disappointed that you didn't tell him, but more annoyed that he didn't notice something was wrong himself. how could he not see how out of balance with nature you were?
squirrels you away to his tent to heal you, make you soothing and medicinal teas, his big hands over the source of the infection.
you burrow into his touch, into his chest, and you end up sitting in his lap as he heals you.
he wants to tell you off a little, but is more relieved that you're alright. encourages you to share all your burdens with him.
kisses you on the forehead, then on the mouth when he's sure you're strong enough for it not to knock you flat.
Dammon
my poor boy is just a blacksmith, so though he doesn't exactly panic, he does scoop you up and try to find a healer as soon as he can.
waits quietly and nervously as you are examined, silently cursing himself for being too busy to see how you were hurt. he's meant to be better than this. he's meant to love you, how didn't he notice?
when you come to he can't stop apologising, and it takes several of your kisses to soothe him and tell him it was not his fault but yours.
he makes you promise that you'll always tell him when you're hurt. has you look into his eyes and swear it.
he can't do much on the battlefield but he can protect you where he can.
Rolan
another one cursing that he doesn't know healing spells.
"you aren't meant to die, gods damn it! you're meant to be strong... what good am I if I can't keep you safe..."
rushes you to the best doctor in Baldur's Gate. pays for all the treatment that you could need. holds your hand at your bedside for your entire recovery... until you come back to consciousness, of course, at which point he just starts telling you off for being stupid enough to get into his mess in the first place.
you grab him by the collar and drag him down for a kiss. that finally shuts him up. but he never lets you forget how foolish you were.
Zevlor
practical but still worried about you.
you collapse in the field and he finds a safe place to hide the both of you from dangerous eyes, using his Lay on Hands ability to channel his magic into healing.
you try to apologise but a finger to your lips silences you, and all you can do is watch in quiet wonder as he burns the infection out with his Paladin's light.
when you're better he gently chides you. tells you that you have people relying on your leadership, and that a problem shared means there are more heads working on how to fix it.
when he sees how sorry you are lets you cuddle into him. when you say you'll repay him, he insists your happiness and well-being is enough for an old warrior like him.
does take the kiss you offer, though. he's been wanting to do that for a while...
#Zevlor x reader#zevlor bg3 x reader#Zevlor x tav#dammon x reader#damon bg3 x reader#Dammon x tav#rolan x tav#rolan x reader#rolan bg3 x reader#gale of waterdeep x reader#Gale of waterdeep x tav#Astarion x reader#astarion x tav#halsin x reader#halsin x tav#wyll x tav#wyll x reader#wyll ravengard x reader#my writing#Long post#bg3 imagine#Gale x reader#Gale x tav#lae'zel x reader#lae'zel x tav#karlach x reader#karlach x tav#shadowheart x reader#shadowheart x tav#companions x tav
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Wicked Game E.M.
Warnings: 18+, minors don't interact! angst, slightly mean!Eddie, enemies to lovers, smut, Eddie calls reader names, choking, Eddie spits in reader's mouth, masturbation, unprotected sex, jealous Eddie, jealous reader, Eddie calling himself freak, hurt/comfort, Eddie calls reader ‘bee’, it’s a nickname he gave her
Pairing: Eddie Munson x fem!reader
Summary: Your best friend Steve and his new friend bring someone into your life that you just can't stand, Eddie Munson. He teases you, he says mean things to you and as foolish as you are, you still desire him- just like he desires you.
Word count: 12.5k+
Note: @take-everything-you-can , thank you for this amazing request. I hope you're gonna like this one, I loved writing it!
stranger things masterlist
Tagging some people who might be interested 🥰 @littledemondani @wroteclassicaly @corrodedcorpses @mysticmunson @aftermidnightwriting @bimbobaggins69
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You and your best friend come as a package deal, wherever one goes, the other follows. There is not a single day you spend without each other, you do lunch breaks together, he comes over to hang out even when you’re busy studying or doing homework, you help him get ready for dates and he helps you pick out outfits for parties, when he’s sick, you take care of him and vice versa. You adore him. You are pretty sure that you will move in together if neither of you find a partner till then.
You grew up together and always stuck to each other’s side.
When your best friend found a second best friend, you were scared that you would lose him but luckily, that wasn’t the case, he didn’t leave, he didn’t abandon you like others would do after making new friends. You would always be his number one and he made that very clear and she became your best friend as well. Robin is amazing, you adore her just as much as you adore Steve. She is funny and sweet and you love spending time with her but you can’t stand her ‘forever’ best friend, Eddie Munson.
That man had it out for you ever since he laid eyes on you, you don’t know what it is about you that makes him so mad but he never fails to make you feel irritated and angry. Eddie is not malicious in any way, he is no bully. He just makes his dislike for you very known. He teases you, makes sly and snarky comments, glares at you before you even turn to look at him.
That was before your best friend became his best friend.
Now it’s so much worse because not only do you have to tolerate him at school, you also have to tolerate him in your free time.
While Robin is always sweet and supportive of you.
Eddie is grumpy, mean and annoyed with you.
You don’t know where it had all started, you can’t even remember if you ever even talked to him before he chose to hate you, all you remember is the cold shoulder he only ever gave you.
You do wonder why he dislikes you so much, is it because you come from the popular crowd? Maybe. But Steve used to be the most popular guy in school and Eddie still gets along with him and likes him. Is it because you have wealthy parents? Because you live in a big house, wear fancy clothes and have a nice car? Possible. But Steve has it all too and he never gets shit from Eddie. Or are you just an unlikable person to him? Now, that would make you sad because that would mean that he would just hate you for the person you are, he would hate you for your personality, for being you.
But then things take a small turn after a party at Steve’s place. You see a little deeper into his mind.
“What’s with the scowl on your face, bee?” Eddie asks as he gets so close to your face that you can smell the disgusting beer and cigarettes.
“Ew, get off,” you scowl as you push him away, “and stop calling me that, nerd.”
Eddie hasn’t strayed away from that nickname ever since you had been stung by one when you were all out at the lake, you kept swatting away the bee that continuously made it’s way back to you, you called it annoying and hissed in pain when it had stung you. Eddie laughed at your demise, ‘you’re a bee too, annoying and ready to attack’.
He smirks, flicking your hair, he moves back and plops down on the bench beside you, he follows your gaze, he can’t even help but scoff when he sees what you’re looking at.
Steve is talking to the girl that stood him up a week ago, calling off the date because of her upset stomach but then you and Robin ran into her at the store, she was with a different guy, he hugged her from behind and kissed her neck while she was picking out snacks, not looking sick at all.
Eddie rolls his eyes, “jealous huh?”
You scrunch your face up, tearing your eyes away from Steve, you turn to look at Eddie, “why would I be jealous?”
He shrugs, leaning back, he blows smoke into your face and smirks when you begin to cough.
“Because you’re in love with Steve.”
A loud laugh falls from your lips, earning a few looks from the other partygoers who spend the night out in the garden rather than the crowded house.
“I’m not in love with Steve,” you snort, shaking your head as your eyes flicker with amusement.
It’s not the first time that someone assumed that you are in love with him or that he is in love with you. You get mistaken for a couple, all the time, sometimes you play along just for the fun of it but you and Steve are not into each other, at all. It has always been purely platonic between you two, there’s no feelings on his part and neither on yours. You are best friends, platonic soulmates.
“Yes, you are,” Eddie says.
Rolling your eyes, you sigh, “what makes you say that?”
“Because you’re super close and you are fiercely protective of him, like in a way where you can just tell that you’re in love with him.”
“That’s such nonsense,” you scoff, “I’m protective, yes.”
He nods, shrugging.
“Because he is my best friend! One who got hurt by a girl he used to love, he got his heart broken, twice! I don’t want it to happen again, he deserves better.”
Eddie thinks about your words, searching for something in your eyes, for a moment, you think that he believes you but then he shakes his head.
“Yeah, you’re still in love with him.”
You scoff, crossing your arms over your chest, you lean back, “okay well, then you’re in love with Robin.”
Eddie laughs loudly, throwing his head back. You glare at him, growing irritated by his presence.
“You’re funny, bee.”
“Why am I funny? I mean, you’re just as close as Steve and I are,” you shrug.
His brown eyes twinkle with amusement, he leans in closer. You ignore the way his cologne makes your head spin or the way his eyes flicker down to your lips or the way he– ‘Stop!’ you tell yourself.
“Robin doesn’t swing that way, remember?”
A breathy laugh leaves your lips and you smirk at him, “yeah but you do, right?” You ask, raising your eyebrows, “just because she isn’t into you or into men in general, doesn’t mean that you can’t have feelings for her. Unrequited love is a thing, you know that right?”
His eyes darken, smirk falling from his lips, his expression hardens, he eyes your face slowly, nodding after a moment of silence, “yeah, it’s a thing. I know that,” he mumbles under his breath, bitterly. He clenches his jaw and looks away.
You furrow your brows as you stare at his side profile. There’s something deeper behind his words, you know that but you choose to ignore it.
“So, you are in love with her, huh?” You ask, smirking in satisfaction when you realize that you have successfully used his own teasing against him.
He scoffs, putting his cigarette between his lips, he stretches his arm out behind you and looks up at the sky, “no, I’m not in love with her.”
“Am I supposed to believe that?”
“Yeah.”
“Okay,” you nod, shrugging, “well, then you gotta believe me that I’m not in love with Steve.”
He snorts at you, “right, okay.”
Placing your palms on the bench, you take a moment to look at him. It’s a hot summer night, the heat forced him to leave his beloved leather jacket at home or probably in the van. He wears a muscle shirt, some band logo you don’t recognize on the front. You let your eyes roam, eying his belt, you wonder if he had bought it that way or if he added the cuffs himself– wherever he got them from, either way, it looks good. He plays with the loose strings on his dark jeans, you notice a new ring on his middle finger, you look up, your eyes land on his pale neck. Squeezing your thighs together, you lick your lips and blink, pulling yourself out of your thoughts, your eyes meet his– he caught you staring.
A smirk pulls at his lips, he eyes your flustered face, whether you realize it or not, you’re biting your bottom lip and squeezing your thighs together– oh, it seems like he found something new to tease you about.
“Are you checking me out?”
For the first time, you have nothing to say, nothing to fight back with, no snarky remarks or comments left for you to give. Instead of saying something, you scoff and roll your eyes at him before you jump up and walk away, leaving a satisfied Eddie behind.
The next time Eddie sees you, you barely even look at him or acknowledge his presence and it pisses him off. It’s no secret that you don’t like him, you let him know any chance you get. You roll your eyes at him, you snap at him and refuse to sit next to him, even when it’s the only free seat left. Eddie takes it as a rejection, he thinks you are repulsed by him and by anything he does.
A part of him assumes that you think he is gross, after all, that’s what the girls at school say about him. They assume that he is unhygienic, that he doesn’t look after himself, that he doesn’t shower or washes his clothes and that’s why you refuse to sit next to him.
Eddie was always an observer, a very good one, except when it comes to you. You refuse to sit next to him because his cologne makes you dizzy, in a way it shouldn’t because Eddie hates you, you shouldn’t like anything about him, you shouldn't have any positive feelings for him.
Eddie thinks you laugh and giggle at the jokes people make about him, not knowing that you always defend him even when he still hates you.
“Eddie,” Robin hisses, nudging his shoulder.
“What?” He grumbles, still staring– glaring at you and your stupid smile as you look through the polaroid pictures you have taken with Robin earlier when you went out to a big flower field to take pretty pictures.
“Stop looking at her like you’re trying to make her disappear.”
“Maybe that’s what I’m trying to do,” Eddie shrugs as he reaches for the bag of M&M’s, opening the bag and putting the candy into the bowl that Steve had put out on the counter.
Robin rolls her eyes, groaning in annoyance, “you know, if you just tried to get along with her, things could be so much easier.”
Eddie hates the way his heart skips a beat when you throw your head back in laughter after Steve had whispered something in your ear. Jealousy rushes through him when Steve comes up behind you and lays his chin on your shoulder, looking at the pictures with you.
Robin knows her best friend very well. She knows that he doesn’t hate you or dislike you in any way, he is intimidated by you, by the feelings he could have if he just let them in. Eddie had crushes before but they were all lighthearted ones, he, himself didn’t even take them seriously, he just admired that person and then moved on a few days later but you? He always had a thing for you, even before Robin befriended Steve, and you and Eddie were forced into each other’s lives. He always looked at you differently but compared to his other crushes, he never let you become one or at least, that’s what he made himself believe. You are more than just a crush.
“Why me? She’s the one who’s being a bitch.”
Robin scoffs, laughing at her best friend, “you’re not serious right now, are you?”
Eddie’s brown eyes flash with annoyance, “I am serious.”
Robin runs her fingers through her short hair, “you’re such an idiot, Munson.”
He scrunches his face up, tearing his eyes away from you and Steve, he turns towards his best friend, “why am I an idiot?”
“Because you’re the one who’s always being mean towards her for no reason, you act like a damn child who can’t deal with the crush he has on that one girl,” she says in a hushed whisper, glancing at you to see if you or Steve are looking, “you’re my best friend and I love you dude but grow up, you’re 20 for fucks sake!”
Eddie raises his eyebrows at her, he’s not even hurt, just amused and surprised.
“Oh and if you haven’t realized it yet, the thing you’re feeling whenever you look at her and Steve, it’s called jealousy,” she smirks as she grabs a few of the snacks they have prepared, “Steve is truly just a best friend, they’re purely platonic, with a capital P, like you and I,” she says, pointing between them, “but when she actually starts dating someone, imagine how you’ll feel then. So, you better get that stick out of your ass and start treating her the way you actually want to treat her.”
She leaves him standing in the kitchen, smirking to herself when she notices the flustered look on his face. She knows that he likes you, just like Steve knows that you like Eddie. You’re both too stubborn to realize it.
“Are we ready for movie night, or what?” Robin asks as she places the snacks on the table.
“Yes!” You say, clapping your hands together, you start collecting the polaroid pictures.
“What are we starting with?” Steve asks as he gets up to put the tape in, “the shining or the evil dead?”
“Both are gross,” you shudder.
“Aw, does the princess need protection?” Eddie asks as he walks into the living room.
Steve chuckles, smirking at Eddie while you roll your eyes. You get up and walk past him with the pictures in your hand, you put them back in your little backpack, not noticing that you have left one on the floor. Eddie’s eyes fall on the picture, putting the bowl of M&M’s on the table, he bends down to pick it up, it’s a picture of you, it’s a little blurry but still sharp enough for him to see all your beauty. Your smile is bright, your eyes are squinted, the sun is shining down on you, making your skin glow. You’re wearing the same little sundress you’re wearing right now, flowers are tucked into your hair. Eddie can’t even help but smile, his heart beats a little faster.
You are so beautiful.
“Alright, let’s watch the movie!” Steve says, startling Eddie, who quickly puts the picture into the backpocket of his jeans, looking around to see if anyone has noticed anything but no one did. Steve settles on the couch, Robin plops down next to him, giving him a knowing smirk. Steve nudges her shoulder as he reaches for the bowl of popcorn.
Eddie shakes his head, sighing. They are plotting something, he knows, they are.
Sitting down on the other end of the couch, he leaves the spot next to Robin for you, already expecting you to complain about sitting next to him. To his surprise, you sit down next to him without a single complaint.
Eddie is a little surprised.
“Do you want cuddles, bee?” Eddie smirks.
You roll your eyes as you look at him, “from you? No thanks.”
He chuckles, “aw, come on, I’ll keep you safe.”
“I’m not even scared.”
Lies.
As much as you love horror movies, some of them just scare you. You flinch at every jump scare, hide your face behind your hands and use every possible excuse to leave the room, whether it is to get snacks or having to use the bathroom and as though the darkness in Steve’s big house isn’t bad enough, it also starts storming outside. The winds are heavy and the thunder is loud, it begins to rain harder and harder.
Your knees are pulled to your chest and you opt to look out the window instead of the TV screen, just as one of the characters starts screaming, Eddie pokes your waist, startling you.
“Eddie!” You shriek, slapping his arm, you glare at him as he starts laughing at your reaction.
“Eddie!” He mimics, pouting at you.
You roll your eyes, clenching your jaw.
“Leave her alone, Munson,” Steve chuckles as he throws some popcorn at him, some of it landing in your hair as well and your cleavage.
Eddie snorts, looking down at his chest, he picks up some of the popcorn and pops it in his mouth, “thanks, I was just about to get some popcorn.”
You shake your head when Steve throws more at him, ducking out of the way, you pick out the ones in your hair. Eddie snatches them out of your hand, “give them to me.”
You furrow your brows, watching him eat them.
“You want this one too?” You joke as you reach for the one that got stuck in your cleavage.
His eyes widen, a smirk tugging at his lips, he looks into your eyes and you can already see the mischief, the kind of smile that tells that he is up to no good. He leans closer, instead of taking it with his fingers, he opens his mouth, waiting for you to place it on his tongue.
You swallow nervously, your hand moves out of instinct, placing the sweet treat on his tongue, you gasp a little when he wraps his lips around your finger.
What the fuck?
Your eyes widen, heat rushes to your cheeks and once again, Eddie forces you to squeeze your thighs together. His lips feel hot against your skin and he looks into your eyes as he licks your finger, you can’t help but wonder what it would feel like to feel his lips on other parts of your body, to feel his tongue on your clit and his ringed fingers inside of you as he looks up at you the way he does right now.
Eddie smirks, he knows what he has done to you. He pulls away, feeling satisfied enough, for now. He leans back against the soft cushions and places his hand on his chest, looking back at the screen, he acts like nothing even happened, while you are left a blushing mess.
You blink and stare at him in disbelief, goosebumps litter your skin and your heart beats fastly in your chest. As you come back to reality, you suddenly grow incredibly embarrassed, knowing that Steve and Robin most likely watched it all happen but when you turn to glance at them, you notice that Robin is fast asleep and Steve’s eyes are glued to the TV, though the smirk on his face tells you that he saw it all.
For the rest of the night, you sit there with a flustered look on your face, waiting for it to be over.
The following weeks, Eddie continues to act the same way, mostly.
He is still mean, snappy and annoying but on top of that, he added his teasing. You know it’s only to humiliate you, knowing that he can make you blush, that he can make you feel something other than anger towards him, he can see the way you react to his subtle touches and suggestive comments. A part of you thought that he would be less rude after realizing that he can get a different kind of rise out of you but you thought wrong, if anything, he becomes meaner and meaner and it all takes an unexpected turn at Tina’s annual Halloween Party.
Eddie only came reluctantly, he never liked parties and only ever came to make money or to accompany his friends. Steve and Robin are on the dance floor, throwing back drinks, laughing at their own jokes and dancing with a group of drunk and giggling girls.
Eddie rolls his eyes as he looks around, recognizing some jocks from school with their cheerleader girlfriends who give him nasty looks. He clutches the can of beer tightly against his chest, he tries to entertain himself by looking at all the different costumes but not even that will distract him from the awful music, the annoying people or you.
You are wearing a fairy costume, a really exposing one. Clad in a short sage green dress, a tight corset, wings that are littered with rhinestones and glitter, heeled boots and a tiara, you look more beautiful than ever, magical.
Eddie’s heart fluttered in his chest when he saw you as him and Robin waited for you and Steve. He was actually frozen in place and awestruck and so was the guy, you are heavily flirting with right now.
Your back is pressed against the wall, you’re giggling and smiling at the guy in front of you, his hand is placed against the wall next to your head, he ducks down a little, leaning closer to you so he can hear you better over the loud music.
Eddie clenches his jaw, anger flooding through his veins the longer he watches you flirt with the jock he can’t remember the name of.
He puts his other hand on your waist and leans in to whisper something into your ear, you bite your lip and nod causing more anger to rush through Eddie. He can’t stand this, the sight of some asshole touching you, playing with your hair and making you giggle.
Eddie grips his drink tighter, enough to almost crush it. He watches you with darkened eyes.
The guy takes your hand and begins to pull you away, the blush on your face is deep and you fight the smile off your face, you don’t even acknowledge Eddie’s presence as you walk past him, hand in hand with the other man who leads you towards the stairs.
Eddie feels incredibly angry.
It’s the kind of anger he had never felt before.
He knows exactly what will happen once the jock has you all to himself and Eddie can’t stand the thought of it. The fire inside of him becomes unbearable, he can’t let it happen. He slams the can of beer on a nearby table and follows you, stomping after you angrily. He pushes some drunk guy out of his way who stumbles back, slurring some curse word at Eddie who doesn’t even bother to look at him. Before you can even take a step further, Eddie reaches for your hand and pulls you back. Your hand slips from the other’s man’s grip and you stumble back into Eddie’s chest, yelping.
Your confused face meets his, your lips part when you see the anger in his eyes.
“Where do you think you’re going?” He asks, sounding like a man, possessed.
You furrow your brows, “w-what?”
Your new friend turns around, looking between you and Eddie.
“Get lost,” Eddie snaps at him, glaring at the jock, not bothering to look back, he just pulls you along with him, rolling his eyes at your protests.
“Eddie!” You slap his arm, “let me go!”
He only shakes his head, walking towards the entrance with a determined look on his face, he opens the door and pulls you out with him. Shutting it behind you and standing it front it so you won’t be able to get back in.
“What the hell is your problem!”
“What were you doing with that guy?” He asks, completely ignoring your question or the angry look on your face.
He irritates you in the worst ways possible.
“That’s none of your business, Munson!” You yell, “why do you even care?”
Eddie avoids eye contact, he looks down at the ground instead and sighs.
“You do know that he just wants to fuck you, right?” He mumbles.
“Yeah, you do know that maybe I wanted just that?” You retort, throwing your hands up, “if you haven’t noticed, I don’t really have a boyfriend, oh and might I add that it’s probably your fault?”
To hear that you wanted to hook up with some random guy, some jock, makes him feel sick but to hear you saying that you don’t have a boyfriend because of him makes him smirk, he can’t even fight it off, not even when he looks up at you and feigns annoyance, “why me?”
You roll your eyes, crossing your arms over your chest, you can’t even feel the breeze on your exposed skin, you are too angry to notice anything.
“Every time a guy even looks my way, you’re there, scaring them away! And god forbid someone even comes close to me or touches me in any way!”
You are fed up with him and his stupid actions.
You know why he is doing it, he wants to see you miserable and you are miserable, he knows that. He can see the longing looks in your eyes whenever you see a cute couple out on the streets, the sad smiles that pull at your lips whenever you see a guy getting his girlfriend flowers, taking her out on dates or even something as simple as opening the door for her and placing his hand on the small of her back.
You crave intimacy, you crave having someone to call your own, being someone's favorite person. Yeah, you might be Steve’s favorite person, his girl but you won’t be forever, someday he is gonna meet that one girl that he will drop anyone and anything for, even you and when that happens, you won’t have anyone.
You aren’t lucky in the dating department, at all. If it isn’t Eddie scaring the guys away, then it’s you, doing it for him.
“Why can’t you just leave me alone?” You ask, “I know you hate me but god, when I hate someone, I stay away from them, why can’t you do the same for me?”
Eddie frowns at your words, his eyes flash with guilt when he sees the tears in your eyes, you aren’t just angry this time, you’re also hurt.
“Maybe I was just protecting you,” he shrugs.
You scoff at his words, shaking your head, you pinch the bridge of your nose and close your eyes for a moment, “protect me,” you mumble, “right, am I supposed to believe that?” You ask as you look back into his eyes. You struggle to read him. Eddie’s walls are so high up, you can’t even sneak a peek.
He nods, “yes, the guy is a jock, bee.”
“So?”
“He would just hurt you!” He says angrily, taking a step forward, “he would get his dick wet and leave you with nothing, then he would brag about it to his friends and I can assure you, that guy doesn’t even know how to make a girl cum, I did you a favor.”
You raise your eyebrows, tilting your head, “do you?”
He blinks.
“What?”
“Do you know how to make a girl cum?”
He blushes at your words, drawing back a little, he straightens up and chuckles, “of course.”
You lick your lips, looking him up and down. Eddie must be one of the only ones without a costume, you wonder why he isn’t wearing one, that guy is in love with his fantasy game, there is no way that he is no fan of Halloween and costumes.
“Right,” you snort.
“You don’t believe me?” He asks as he steps even closer to you.
You shrug, “nope, I don’t believe you.”
One moment, he was standing feets away from you and suddenly, he is right in front of you. Dangerously close. You have to tilt your head to meet his eyes and when you do, your heart skips a beat. His eyes are dark, pupils blown as he sneaks a look at your lips.
You can smell his cologne, his aftershave, him. You would never tell him that but he drives you crazy, he makes your stomach flutter, he stays on your mind for too long, sneaking his way into your thoughts when you touch yourself at night.
Eddie reaches his hand out to touch your face, he cups your cheek and lets his thumb rest on your bottom lip. Just like the night at Steve’s place, your breath hitches in your throat and you grow incredibly flustered.
“Do you want me to show you?” He whispers.
Your eyes widen, a small gasp falls from your lips.
What?
No way, did he just ask you that?
He is playing with you, isn’t he?
By now he knows the effect he has on you. He knows that you blush when he is around, he knows that you feel something when he touches you, he knows that you can’t get him off your mind. He knows it all and he decides to use it against you, he knows that he can humiliate you, he knows that he can hurt you and it brings him enjoyment.
The smirk on his face and the amusement in his eyes tells you all that. Internally, he is making fun of you, he is satisfied that he ruined your night and as though that isn’t enough, he now uses your attraction towards him as a weapon, to laugh about you later on and make fun of you with his band buddies.
You slap his hand away, your brows draw together and your nervous stare turns into an angry frown, “don’t touch me, asshole.”
Though he is a little surprised, he still chuckles.
You shake your head and step away from him, turning around, you don’t even bother going back inside to let your friends know that you’re leaving or to get your jacket, you just want to be away from him.
It’s late and it’s cold, you are scared to walk through the empty streets alone but you are too stubborn to back around.
“Hey!”
You roll your eyes at him and continue to walk.
“Where are you going?”
You don’t bother to answer, you hug yourself tighter to shield yourself from the cold, blinking away the angry tears. The streets are empty, aside from the many cars on the side of the streets, you walk past Steve’s car, suddenly regretting the decision to walk away and choosing to walk home alone, on Halloween night.
You hear his footsteps though and as much as you hate to admit it, you do feel at ease knowing that he comes after you.
Eddie rolls his eyes at your silence but he admires the view in front of him. Your dress is a thin and flowy one, it swats from one side to the other with each step that you take, the wind causes it to lift up a bit, exposing your naked skin. Eddie almost growls at the side of it.
“Bee!”
“Stop calling me that, you dick!”
Eddie snorts at you, your insults never hurt him, if anything, they amuse him. When you look at him with anger in your eyes and snap back at him, you look cuter than ever. He picks up the pace and just as you pass his van, he grabs your arm and pulls you back, smirking at your little yelp, he slams you against his van and steps in front of you, caging you against it.
It’s dark and yet he can see the nervous and shy look in your eyes, he can see the way you tense up and press yourself against the van as though it will make you feel him any less against you.
“Will you stop running away from me?”
He places his hands on your waist, touching you in such a gentle way that it makes your knees buckle, almost. You look into his dark eyes, growing more and more irritated. Why can’t he just let you go? Why can’t he just stay out of your goddamn way? Why does he have to make things so hard for you?
You hate him.
“Will you stop sticking your nose into my business?” You ask angrily as you place your hand on his chest to push him away, as though you will find the strength to, “will you stop following me around just to piss me off? Seriously, what do you get out of this, huh?”
Eddie shrugs, the smirk remains on his lips, he eyes the scowl on your face, the flash with irritation in your eyes, he looks down at your chest, watching the way it rises up and down heavily.
“It’s fun to see you like this.”
You clench your jaw and scoff.
“It’s fun to ruin my life?”
Now it’s his turn to scoff, he rolls his eyes at your words, “you’re so dramatic.”
"Oh, am I?" You mumble.
He nods, his grip tightens on your waist, butterflies flutter in your stomach and you despise it. You despise the emotions he causes you to feel.
“Yeah, I ruined your life because you didn’t get to fuck that jock?” He snorts, narrowing his eyes at you, “you are dramatic, bee.”
You close your eyes and lower your head, shaking it as you take deep breaths.
“You are so annoying.”
“Hmm, what was that?” Eddie whispers, placing his finger under your chin, he tilts your head up, “say that again.”
You swallow nervously, not opening your eyes just yet, you lick your lips, “you are annoying.”
“Why?”
“Why?” You laugh in disbelief as you open your eyes to look at him. He is staring at you with curiosity on his face, tilting his head as he waits for your explanation.
“You gotta be kidding me,” you scoff, pulling your hand away from his chest, you wrap it around his wrist instead and force his hand away from your face, “is that actually a serious question?”
He purses his lips and nods, “yep.”
“You’re an asshole, Eddie!”
He rolls his eyes, “yeah, you said that before.”
“Yeah and you don’t believe me! You treat me like shit–”
“No, I don’t!”
“Yes, you do, Eddie!” You exclaim, “you say mean shit all the time, you make dumb comments and tease me and then act like nothing ever happened!”
“Tease you how?” He smirks, completely ignoring the rest of your words.
You squint your eyes, huffing angrily. Is he actually clueless or does he just want to see you so angry and embarrassed? Either way, he always gets what he wants.
“You sucked on my finger and then you acted like nothing happened!”
Your angry pout makes his heart soar.
“That’s what you’re so upset about?” He chuckles.
His smirk causes the outburst of anger, you finally push him away from you. There is absolutely nothing amusing about this situation, at least not to you.
“Wipe that smirk off your goddamn face, Munson! I can’t stand when you do that!”
“Did you want me to do more than that?” He asks.
“You wish,” you scoff, “you think I want you?”
If you didn’t know any better, you would say that hurt flashed in his eyes but that can’t be, right? Why would he be hurt by anything you say?
He chuckles bitterly and nods to himself.
“No,” he mumbles, “I know you don’t want me. A fancy little princess like you wants someone like that jock, you want someone who will buy you shit, someone who will spoil you, take you on dates to Enzo’s or whatever, someone you can take home to your rich parents, someone you won’t feel embarrassed to be with, someone you can be seen with, someone you will have that ‘perfect’ future with.”
Confused, you stare at him with a frown on your face.
Eddie’s anger comes out of nowhere the way it always does.
“But sweetheart, none of them can give you what you need.”
“W-What do I need?” You ask, waiting for him to continue. He watches the way your eyes flicker down to his lips before they meet his eyes again.
“They can’t touch you like you crave to be touched, they can’t kiss you like you wanna be kissed, they can’t fuck you like you wanna be fucked, they can’t treat you like you deserve to be treated.”
Your breath hitches in your throat, your lips part in surprise, your heart begins to pound against your ribcage.
Eddie somehow made his way into your personal space again. He is close enough for you to feel his breath on your skin.
“You need someone to put you in your place, you need someone to be rough with you, someone who can treat you like the little slut that you are,” he says, gripping your face in his large hand, “I see the way you look at me when you think that I’m not paying attention, I can see the way you squeeze your thighs together when you look at my hands, I bet you wonder what it would feel like if I touched you, huh? I bet you touch yourself and think about me, about my hands, about my fingers in your tight little pussy.”
Your eyes widen, heat rushes to your cheeks, you are too overwhelmed to keep your eyes locked with his, so you look down.
Eddie smirks but it’s a dark smirk, a bitter one.
“Bet you are disgusted by yourself, huh?” He spits as he grips you tighter, “thinking about fucking the dirty town freak, I bet you hate yourself for wanting to ride my dick, that’s why you’re always such a bitch to me, right?” He asks angrily, “you take your anger out on me because you can’t stand yourself for wanting to fuck me?”
You shake your head. He is wrong, so wrong. He is no dirty freak in your eyes and you are not disgusted by him, you are disgusted by yourself for wanting someone who hates your guts so much, not for who he is. Eddie is amazing to his friends but unfortunately, you aren’t one of them.
You never hated Eddie, at least not until he forced you to hate him.
“No.”
“No?” He murmurs as he leans even closer to you, “you don’t think about me?”
You shift, looking up at him with a shy expression, you don’t bother answering, your silence gives it away.
You do think about him. He knows it.
You hate the way he looks so sure of his words, the way he thinks that he has you all figured out, the way he thinks he knows everything about you.
“Get away from me, Eddie,” you say with a shaky voice and an unsure voice, you both know that you don’t want it, you don’t want him to get away.
He licks his lips as he stares down at you. The look in his eyes makes you cower back a little, it makes you feel nervous but also flustered. Eddie raises his hand up to your face, he tucks your hair behind your ear and leans down, surprising you by pressing a gentle kiss to your shoulder.
Your lips part and you hold your breath.
“Why?” He whispers as he kisses you again, higher this time, “scared that you will fall for the town freak?” His fingers play with the thin material of your dress, pushing it a little aside so he has more access to your shoulder, he presses his plump lips back against your shoulder, kissing you again and again, “scared that you will hate yourself for it?”
You can’t even utter a single word, too many emotions rush through you. You are confused about this, you are angry about his words but you are also aroused and yes, you do hate yourself for it but not for the reason he thinks.
His hand grips your waist, he pulls you flush against him and you gasp when you feel his bulge pressing against your stomach. Eddie attaches his lips to your neck, “scared that no one else will wanna touch you after the freak fucked you? What would they think if they already knew that you are fantasizing about it? I bet they would think you’re disgusting–”
“God, shut the fuck up!”
You push him away from you with force, your breathing is heavy, just like his. Eddie looks a little surprised by your sudden outburst, rejection crosses his features, his brows drag together and he opens his mouth to speak, probably to say something hurtful after you just pushed him away like that, he wants the upper hand but you won’t let him have it, not this time.
“Just shut up,” you repeat.
He presses his lips together in a straight line, he is tense, his eyes hold a combination of hurt and anger. The tension between the two of you is thick. Nothing else but you both exist in this moment. You don’t hear the faint music from the ongoing party, you don’t feel the cold wind on your exposed skin, you don’t hear the rustling of the leaves but you hear his heavy breathing, you hear the pounding of your heart, you feel the pull towards him.
Eddie waits for you to say something, to do something. A part of him expects you to slap him for kissing you without permission, the other part expects you to hurt him with cruel words but neither of those things happen.
You stare at him for what feels like forever. Your eyes flicker to his lips and back to his eyes, your stomach flutters and your knees feel weak, you’re angry but you also long for him.
Fuck it.
You take a step forward and look into his awaiting eyes.
Fuck it, y/n.
You grab his face and pull him down, you close your eyes and slam your lips against his. Eddie’s eyes widen, he stares at you in shock and confusion. You are kissing him. You are kissing him! And your lips feel as soft as he always imagined them to feel like. His heart begins to race.
Kiss her, idiot! He tells himself. He cups your cheeks and pulls you closer, closing his eyes, he finally kisses you back and if this isn’t the best feeling in the world then he doesn’t know what is.
You slide your hands down to his neck, holding him tightly as you deepen the kiss. Eddie parts his lips, allowing you to slip your tongue past his lips. He moans at the feeling, his skin and his lips tingle, he already feels addicted to your touch.
The kiss is nothing but passionate, it’s soft and gentle but you want more, you want to feel him closer and closer, you slide your hand down his stomach and wrap your arm around his waist, pressing him tighter against you. He moans at the feeling, his heart flutters.
Eddie walks you back and slams you against his van, earning a whimper from you. You kiss each other until you are both short of oxygen and gasping for air but even as he pulls away, his lips keep touching yours. You breathe into each other’s mouths, keeping each other close as your eyes lock again.
He wants you, you can see it in his eyes.
This time it’s him who initiates the kiss, he slams his lips roughly against yours causing you to let out a loud and needy whimper, you can feel him smirking against your lips.
This kiss is rough and angry. Your lips smack loudly against each other, your teeth clash but neither of you care, you pull his hair and make him growl. He digs his ringed fingers into your waist as he pushes his knee in between your thighs.
“Eddie,” you gasp as he starts kissing his way down to your neck.
“Yes?”
“I know you hate me,” you whisper as you close your eyes and put your hand in his hair, holding onto his curl as he begins to suck on your sweet spot.
No, he doesn’t hate you. How could he? Instead of telling you this, he keeps quiet, choosing to continue kissing you.
“Show me.”
“Show you what?”
“Show me how much you hate me,” you whisper, “please.”
Eddie opens his eyes and he pulls away from your neck to look at you. He can see the look in your eyes, the intrigued and needy one.
You want him just like he wants you.
“Are you sure?”
For a split second, you see a different side of him, a soft one, a caring one.
You nod.
He grabs your jaw, tilting your head up so you are forced to look at him, “I need words, sweetheart.”
You nod again, “yes, I’m sure.”
Without wasting another second, Eddie unlocks his van and pushes you into the back, closing the door behind him. He fumbles around in the dark for a moment until he finds the switch that turns on the little light.
Looking around, you raise your brows, feeling a little impressed by the lack of the mess you expected. A few pillows are laying around, blankets, even a few comics. You know that he and Robin used to go to the drive-in movie theaters a lot but you can’t help but wonder if he ever brings other girls in here. If he brought the pillows and blankets here just for them so they can feel comfortable. You wonder how he treats them, does he tease them like he teases you? Does he kiss them like he just kissed you? Is he mean to them? Or is he sweet to them? Does he treat them better than he treats you?
Suddenly, you feel yourself frowning and growing insecure and unsure. Do you really want to fuck the guy that hates you with a passion?
But you never answer your own question. Eddie grabs your face and pulls you back in for a heated kiss. You kiss back without a moment of hesitation.
His scent, his taste, his touch, you are addicted already and you feel the hatred for yourself growing. You don't know that he feels the same about you, that he loves the way you taste, that he loves the way you smell so sweet, you don't know that he just loves you.
You push his jacket off his shoulders while he fumbles with the wings on your costume, surprising you by taking them off carefully so he doesn’t break them. Something about the way he parts from the kiss, to put the wings down gently, makes your heart flutter.
You blink, forcing yourself to look away from him. You take the tiara off your head and place it on the ground as well, reaching for the zipper on your dress– “stop, let me.” Eddie mumbles as he reaches around you to undo it. You stare at him, admiring the way his brown eyes shine so beautifully beneath the dim light. He pushes your dress down to your stomach, his eyes flickering with something you cannot read.
“Fuck,” he mumbles as he eyes your lacy bra, your boobs, your soft skin, “you’re so sexy,” he breathes, forgetting about the hate he is supposed to show to you, “so beautiful, shit..”
Eddie doesn’t notice the emotions in your eyes, the lingering sadness and the insecurity. You distract yourself by kissing him again and again, reaching for the hem of his shirt, you take it off of him. He throws it behind him on the floor.
You place your hands on his pale chest, taking in the sight of his tattoos, you feel the urge to kiss every single one of them.
Eddie admires the way you look at him, the way your lips part and your eyes flash with emotions. He touches your cheeks, moving your hair out of your face. You look up at him with big eyes, “touch me.”
He smirks, “don’t have to ask me twice.”
He pushes you down carefully, making sure that you lie your head on the pillows, your back meets the soft cushions and you sigh as you feel his cold hands on your stomach, you’re almost too shy to look up at him but when you do, your heart stops.
Eddie stares down at you in awe, he bunches your dress up on your waist and eyes you up and down, from your pretty face to your chest, your stomach and your clothed pussy. He pushes your legs apart and settles in between them, putting your legs over his, he spreads you open and stares at the wet spot on your pink panties.
“Fuck,” he growls, all his blood rushes to his dick, as though he wasn’t hard already, he feels himself growing harder, “I’m gonna ruin your pussy, baby.”
Your cunt clenches around nothing, you take in a sharp breath as his eyes meet yours, “take your bra off,” he orders.
You bite your lip, pushing yourself up on your elbows, you do as he said, pushing the straps of your bra down first, you watch the way his eyes darken when you reach behind you to unclasp it. You blush, feeling yourself getting shy under his gaze.
“Show me your tits, pretty girl.”
You hate him, you hate him so much.
You throw your bra to the side and lie back against the pillows.
He grips your thighs tightly, eyes flashing with hunger, “perfect fucking tits,” he murmurs as he slides one hand up to touch your boobs.
“Eddie,” you whimper.
He adjusts your legs, wrapping them around his waist, his clothed dick brushes against your pussy, making you both moan in pleasure. He leans down to kiss your chest, taking one nipple in his mouth, he begins to suck on it.
“Oh.. Eddie,” you moan as you throw your hand in his hair, “i-is that how you treat people you hate?”
He chuckles against you, pulling away from you, he gives you a suggestive look as he sits back up, he shakes his head at you, “just you, baby,” he says.
“Touch yourself.”
You blink.
“What?”
He looks down, bringing his hand to your aching pussy, he touches you over your panties, rubbing your clit teasingly, smirking at your little whine.
“Touch yourself or I won’t fuck you.”
Perv.
You swallow nervously, slipping your hand down your stomach, you close your eyes and touch yourself over your panties, spreading your legs wider, you start rubbing your clit.
“Open your eyes,” he demands, catching you off guard by smacking your ass. You gasp and open your eyes, seeing the dark look in his eyes makes you even wetter, “look at me when you touch yourself.”
You nod.
“Show me how you touch yourself when you’re all alone, baby. Tell me what you think about.”
A shiver runs down your spine. You always thought about this, about him. It’s hot to see him so rough and dominating but a part of you hates that he gets to have all the control. You push yourself up a little and bring your hand up to his lips, looking into his curious eyes, you smirk, “spit on them.”
He raises his brows, eyes flashing with surprise. He does it without questioning you. Spitting onto your fingers.
“Thanks,” you mumble. You push your panties to the side and touch yourself with your spit covered fingers, letting out a loud moan as you run your fingers through your wet folds before you begin to rub your aching clit.
Eddie’s dick twitches in his pants as he watches you.
“Such a pretty pussy, fuck,” he grunts, fighting the urge to bury his face in your cunt.
“You wanna know what I think about when I touch myself?”
“Yes.. fuck, yes. I wanna know.”
You smirk at him. You won’t give him what he wants, you won’t let him hear what he wants to hear. Why should you? He is gonna treat you even worse when this is over, why should you give him the truth?
“I-I think about Steve,” you moan as you push a finger inside of you, “I think about my best friend fucking me with his big fat cock.” Lies. You think about him fucking you, you think about him splitting you open, you think about him eating you out, fingering you with his rings on, making you his slut.
Eddie’s smirk falls from his face, his eyes darken.
You add a second finger and push it in and out of your wet pussy, moaning at the feeling, “I think about him making me cry as he takes me from behind, as he– fuck.. as he slaps my ass and does whatever he wants.”
You are lying, he knows you’re lying. The look on your face tells him that but he still grows angry and jealous.
You fuck yourself on your fingers, throwing your head back in pleasure as you move them in and out, “I think about riding his dick, about how he would cum inside of me and fill me up until I’m–”
“Shut the fuck up, you little whore,” Eddie growls, grabbing your wrist, he slams it against the floor and replaces your fingers with his, pushing his long and thick fingers into your hole.
You gasp loudly, squeezing your eyes shut as you finally feel his fingers inside you, finally getting to feel what you always dreamed about.
His other hand grabs your cheeks, squishing them together roughly, “I told you to look at me!”
Your stomach clenches as does your cunt, your mouth waters at the feeling of him spreading you open.
“Open your eyes, brat.”
You open your eyes to look at his angry ones. You have never seen him this angry before. You should be scared, you know that. But instead you feel yourself getting more needy, more wet, more aroused. You moan even louder than before and grind back against his fingers.
“Now tell me the truth,” he says through gritted teeth as he starts to fuck you with his fingers, “who do you think about?”
You push yourself up on your elbows to watch him, to see how they move in and out of you.
“S-Steve.”
He slaps your cheek lightly causing you to whimper.
“Liar,” he grunts, he leans over you, wrapping his hand around your neck, he slams you back down and looks into your needy eyes as he continues to slam his fingers in and out of you.
“Eddie,” you whimper.
“That’s right,” he grunts, “say my name.”
He adds a third finger, thrusting them in and out of you. His fingers reach deeper than yours, they reach the spot that you can’t, his rings and the coldness of them just bring more pleasure to your body. You lose yourself in the feeling, you close your eyes despite him telling you not to, your lips part and you chant his name like a prayer. You arch your back in pleasure, tears well up in your eyes.
Eddie stares at you, he watches the way your chest rises up and down, the way you flinch a little when his hand leaves your neck to touch your boob, to play with your nipple. Your stomach tenses up, your pussy clenches around his fingers, you are so wet, he can feel your juices dripping down his fingers, the squelching noises and your moans just make it all even more erotic.
You whimper his name so beautifully.
“Eddie, please.”
“Please what?”
“I wanna cum,” you please, “please let me cum.”
A devilish smirk appears on his face, “oh, you’re gonna cum, baby.”
His words should intimidate you, they should leave you feeling nervous but instead they make you crave him even more.
Eddie leans down and as you feel him shifting, you open your eyes to look at him. He picks up the pace, fucking you harder and faster on his fingers as he presses his tongue against your sensitive clit.
“Oh fuck! Eddie!”
“Mhmm,” he hums against you, looking up at you as he licks your clit, “taste so sweet.”
You spread your legs wider for him and push your hand in his hair, tugging at his dark curls.
“I can feel you clenching around my fingers, baby,” he murmurs against you, “you wanna cum for me? Do it.”
It doesn’t take long for you to reach your high, you cum around his fingers just as he tells you too, you moan loudly, gasping for air but Eddie doesn’t stop there, he pulls his fingers out. He throws your legs over his shoulders and before you can even react, he buries his face in your pussy, slipping his tongue into you, he moans loudly.
“Eddie,” you whine as you watch him through blurry eyes, his rough hands dig into your thighs as he holds them wide open, his eyes are closed as he eats you out, “oh my god.”
Eddie loves the way you taste, the way you sound, the way you feel, the way you beg for him.
“Feels so good…”
He loves knowing that he is the one making you feel so good.
He opens his eyes to look at you, you’re staring at him already, barely able to keep your eyes open, you hold onto his hair so tightly. A single tear slips down your hot cheek.
“You taste so good, sweetheart,” he breathes, smirking at you when he spits on your clit before he places his thumb against it.
Your eyes roll back and you throw your head against the pillows, you try closing your legs but Eddie is stronger than you.
“P-Please..” You sob, pulling at his hair even harder causing him to growl in response. He flicks his tongue inside of you and presses harder against your clit and before you know it, you cum again.
Tears run down your cheeks, you are so sensitive already.
“No more,” you whimper as he continues to lick your pussy, “please.. I just want your cock.”
Eddie smirks at you, pulling away, he sits back up.
Your heart flutters as you look at him. His cheeks are flushed, his curls are messy, his chin is glistening from your juices, saliva dripping down his chest.
You look so fucked out already, sweat coats your forehead, your breathing is heavy and you push your thighs together as you look up at him. Eddie unbuckles his belt, pushing his jeans and boxers down just below his ass, his dick slaps against his stomach.
You push yourself up on your elbows, biting your lip as you stare at him, “do you want me to suck your dick?” You ask as you reach your hand out to wrap your fingers around his thick cock, you lick your lips, pre cum is rolling down his length and it takes everything in you not to take him into your mouth.
Eddie hisses at your touch, his eyelashes flutter.
“Do you want to fuck my face?” You ask, innocently.
He growls, eyes darkening, he shakes his head, “next time, baby. I need to be inside of you,” he says.
“Condom?” You ask.
He closes his eyes, cursing at himself, “I don’t have any.”
You raise your brows, “what do you mean, you don’t have any?”
“It means I don’t have any!” He snaps at you.
“Don’t you use condoms when you fuck?”
A loud laugh falls from his lips, he opens his eyes, shaking his head, “when I fuck? Sweetheart, I don’t get laid very often. I have a whole unopened box of condoms at home,” he snorts.
“You don’t fuck girls in your van?”
“Y/n, the last time I fucked someone, I stole a condom from Jeff and no, I don’t fuck girls in my van.”
Relief floods through you, here you thought that he was fucking girls in his van and getting laid every weekend.
Wrapping your legs around his waist, you pull him down against you, catching him by surprise. He presses his hands against the floor and looks down at you.
“And I’m not really into fucking random girls,” he adds.
Your eyes widen a little, “am I not a random girl?”
He chuckles, shaking his head.
You could never be a random girl.
“No, you’re my enemy,” he says before he slams his lips against yours.
You whine against him and kiss him roughly, digging your feet into his ass, you pull him even closer until you feel his cock rubbing against your pussy. He moans in pleasure, gripping your hips tightly.
“Fuck me, please. I don’t care about the condom, just fuck me,” you murmur against his lips, holding his neck tightly, “please.”
“Are you sure?” He asks, eying your expression, slowly.
You nod, “very sure.”
Eddie pecks your lip softly. For someone who wanted to fuck you, he sure is a little soft with you.
He leans back, staring down at you in awe, he grabs your waist, licking his lips. You watch him, looking at the way he wraps his ringed fingers around his cock, he slides it through your wet folds, teasing your clit with the tip.
“Shit,” he shudders, “you’re so wet. All for me, right?”
You bite your lip, furrowing your brows as you gulp, nodding.
“Say it’s all for me,” he demands.
“It’s for you,” you whine, “all for you, asshole!”
He chuckles darkly, shaking his head at you. You open your mouth again but before you can say anything, Eddie grabs you tighter and in one motion, he thrusts into you, earning a loud gasp from you.
He whimpers at the feeling of your tight walls, leaning down, he buries his face in the crook of your neck.
“Fuck…” You whimper, wrapping your arms around him, “Eddie.” You clench around his cock and hold him tightly.
“You’re so tight and wet,” he grunts against your shoulder, “‘m not gonna last long if you keep clenching around me like this.”
“I told you to show me how much you hate me, Eddie,” you breathe, digging your nails into his back, “so far you’re not doing a good job.”
Something inside of him snaps, he pulls back, placing one hand around your neck, he puts the other one on the pillow next to you. He glares at you.
“You’re a brat, you know that, right?” He growls as he begins to thrust into you.
You gasp at the feeling, taking a deep breath.
“Always getting on my goddamn nerves,” he grunts as he tightens his hold on your neck, he pulls out and pushes back inside of you, roughly. “You have no idea how many times I wanted to do this.” He thrusts deeper, rougher, faster. “How many times I wanted to fuck your needy little pussy and watch you cry for more.”
You look down, watching the way he fucks you roughly on his cock. He moves his hands down to grab your hips with both hands.
“Look at me, baby,” he moans as he starts to pound your pussy, “look at the way you’re taking my cock.. Your pussy was made for me, you were made for me.”
The knot in your stomach tightens, the fire inside of you burns. You feel him in your stomach. You wrap your legs tighter around him and throw your hand back to wrap it around his wrist, “fuck me harder!” You beg, despite the overwhelming sensation in your bones.
“Harder?” He chuckles, “I’ll give you harder, you little brat.”
He enjoys the way you squirm under his body, the way you struggle to take his big cock and yet ask for more. For a moment, he just watches you, he watches the way his cock disappears in your body, the way your juices drip down on the blanket beneath you, the way you throw your head back in pleasure and cry for him, the way your boobs bounce as he ruts into you. You are struggling, your moans are getting high pitched, tears are streaming down your face as you move your head to the side.
“Feels so good, Eddie,” you whimper.
His mouth waters, his stomach clenches as your pussy flutters around his dick. He moans desperately, closing his eyes for a second as he feels himself getting closer. He leans down, grabbing your face, “look at me,” he whispers, “open your eyes and look at me.”
You grip his wrist tighter and open your eyes to look at him, your breathing stutters as you see the way he looks at you, there is something in his eyes you haven’t seen before but you decide to ignore it.
“Open your mouth and stick your tongue out.”
Your eyes widen but you do as he says, opening it, you stick it out for him and maintain eye contact.
He grabs your chin, smirking at you before he spits in your mouth.
Now, if anyone else had done that to you, you would spit it right out and slap them across the face but something about him doing it to you makes you clench even harder around him, the moans you get from him make you shiver.
“Fuck, you like that huh?” He mumbles as you swallow it, he pats your cheek, “you filthy little slut.”
“Mhmm, I like it,” you smirk and pull him down for a kiss.
You can feel his dick twitching inside of you, his thrusts are getting sloppier and his moans are getting louder and more desperate. You kiss each other roughly and hold each other tight. His chest is pressed against yours, he pulls his wrist out of your grip to hold your hand instead.
You jolt as you feel his fingertips on your clit.
“Cum for me,” he mumbles against your lips, “cum on my dick.”
You moan loudly as you cum around him, you scratch his back as you dig your nails into his skin causing him to groan loudly. You clench hard around him and pull him even closer.
“Baby.. fuck.. fuck,” he whimpers against you, “I’m gonna cum,” he warns, unsure of where you want him.
“Cum inside me… ‘wanna feel you, Eddie.”
His heart flutters and his eyes widen as he looks down at you, “you sure?”
“Mhmm, please…”
“Fuck… okay.. shit, baby,” he whimpers as he picks up the pace again, “you want me to breed you, huh? You want me to fill you up with my cum, shit.. I will. I’m gonna leave you dripping for days.. I’m gonna make you mine.”
Mine.
“No one’s ever touching you again,” he moans, “gonna– oh fuck…” He grunts as he places his fingers back against your clit.
“Eddie!” You sob, squeezing your eyes shut as you feel an even stronger sensation in your lower belly. He drills in and out of you in such a rough way, you can’t even feel your legs anymore or the tears that stream down your cheeks all you feel is him.
“I know you got one more in you, baby,” he grunts, kissing your lips, “cum with me.. one more time.”
“I can’t!” You sob.
“Yes, you can, I can feel it, you’re getting tighter around me, just let go for me.”
You can’t even help it, you bite his shoulder and cage him in against you with your legs. He grunts in pain and whimpers in pleasure, he thrusts into you once, twice– “cum with me!”
You let go and cum around him as he releases inside of you, filling you up with his seed.
He whimpers into your neck, holding you tightly as he moans at the feeling. His hips stutter and he finally falls against you. You’re drooling on his shoulder, whimpering at the feeling of his twitching cock inside your pussy. Eddie breathes heavily, not pulling out just yet, he slumps against you and presses lazy kisses on your shoulder.
“Fuck,” he sighs with a grin on his face that you can’t see.
You’re barely able to keep your eyes open, letting go of him, you drop your arms to your sides and close your eyes.
“I can’t feel my legs,” you whisper.
Eddie smirks, “guess I fucked you good, huh?”
You roll your eyes but can’t help but smile, “guess so…”
“What do you mean ‘guess so’?” He scoffs as he pulls himself up a little to look at you, “you came four times, you brat.”
“Should’ve made that five times,” you shrug.
Eddie shakes his head at you, though he can’t help but smirk, you’re a mess. Your hair is disheveled, your cheeks are wet from the tears, your body is hot and shaking from all the orgasms he just pulled out of you.
Grabbing your cheeks, he turns your face towards him, “does that mean I get to make you cum again?” He smirks.
You lick your lips, staring at the spot on his shoulder that you dug your teeth in, you reach out to touch it, “if you want to,” you shrug, acting like it means nothing to you.
“If I want to?” He asks, “what about you, do you want to?”
You are too scared to show him that you do but right now, he isn’t scared to show you how vulnerable he can be. His eyes that usually only ever hold anger for you, hold nothing but hope, it confuses you a little.
You furrow your brows, “I-I don’t know,” you whisper, unable to look into his eyes any longer, you push him back, “get off, please.”
He shakes his head and cups your cheeks, “no, look at me,” he demands, softly.
You blink, swallowing nervously as you look back into his eyes, “you got what you wanted, Eddie.”
“What do you mean?” He frowns.
“You fucked me, put me in my place or whatever, now you can move on to someone else.”
He scoffs, “is that what you think of me?”
You shrug, looking at him with uncertainty in your eyes, “can you blame me?” You whisper, “you treat me like shit.”
His eyes flash with guilt, he nods to himself. Without another word, he pulls away from you, pulling out with a hiss, he puts your panties back in place and puts his boxers and jeans back on.
He fucked up, he knows it. Eddie always struggled with the feelings he had for you. Robin was right when she called him immature for treating you like this– the girl that he secretly loves. He hoped that this would change something but he thought wrong, if anything, he had made things worse for himself, knowing that he got to have you this once and probably never again, breaks his heart.
Eddie hates himself at this moment.
You glance at him as you put your dress back on, not bothering with your bra. Eddie’s hair is a mess, his cheeks are still red, his shoulder and neck littered with bite marks from you. He blinks fastly, as though he tries to blink tears away, it makes your heart clench in your chest. You want to pull him back into your arms and kiss him. Is it a good idea though? Probably not.
You fix your hair and smooth out your dress. Eddie puts his shirt back on, sniffling quietly.
Tears well up in your eyes as you remember all the times that he made you feel bad, all the times he pissed you off and made you angry, all the times he made you feel insecure, yet nothing, absolutely nothing made you feel worse than this.
You leave. You get out of the van on shaky legs, placing your feet on the concrete floor, you blink the tears away as you step away from the van and from him. Now you feel the cold wind and the lonely feeling inside of you. You don’t wanna go, not after you had a taste of what it could be like if he just loved you.
You halt in your tracks, closing your eyes, you take a deep breath.
You can’t walk away, not from him.
You turn back around and just as you take a step forward, Eddie suddenly jumps out of the van with a panicked look on his face and tears in his eyes. Surprised by your presence in front of him, he stares at you for a moment before he reaches out to grab your waist, you let him pull you closer, “please don’t go,” he whispers, “give me a chance, sweetheart. I'll fix things between us, I will, I promise, I will."
He pleads with his eyes and holds you tightly against him, afraid that you will disappear any moment.
Your heart stutters and your knees almost buckle.
“I-I know I fucked up but please–”
You kiss him for the hundredth time tonight and wrap your arms around him. He responds instantly, kissing you back softly and pressing your back against his van just like before, only this time, the kiss is sweet and filled with longing.
“I’m crazy about you too,” you admit.
“You are?” He asks. A smile tugs at his lips, happiness crosses his features.
“Yeah,” you whisper. Placing your palms against his chest, you peck his lips again, “and I never think about Steve,” you mumble, cringing at the words that you have given him before, “he is my best friend and I never ever wanted him and he doesn’t want me either, Eddie.”
He believes you.
“I always just wanted you,” you whisper.
His heart soars at your words, his gaze softens, he could melt right there and then, “do you still want me?”
“Yes,” you whisper, “do you want me?”
You look shy and uncertain of your words, you’re about to look down and break eye contact but he stops you from doing so, tilting your head up, he kisses your lips, “more than anything, sweetheart.”
“Shit.”
Robin smirks at Steve who holds your jacket in his hand.
“I think you owe me 50 bucks.”
Steve rolls his eyes as he watches you and Eddie making out against his van, “no, I don’t. We don’t know who made the first move.”
Robin laughs, crossing her arms over her chest, “I’m saying she did, so..”
Steve shakes his head, “no, Eddie was the one who made moves on her all this time, it was definitely him.”
“You know what?” Robin tears his eyes away from you and Eddie and looks back at Steve, “I bet they’re gonna keep this a secret.”
Steve smirks, shaking his head when he sees Eddie picking you up and throwing you over his shoulder, taking you back to his van.
“Yeah and they’re definitely gonna slip up in the next two weeks.”
Robin shakes her head, “no, y/n can keep a secret, I’m giving them three.”
“Let’s bet on that then.”
“Okay,” Robin nods, “let’s make it 100 bucks.”
Steve sighs, “alright then, say goodbye to your money, Buckley.”
“You wish.”
#eddie munson x you#eddie munson x reader#eddie munson x fem!reader#eddie munson x female reader#eddie munson x y/n#eddie munson imagines#eddie munson imagine#eddie munson smut#stranger things angst#stranger things imagines#stranger things imagine
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Jungkook
𝓛𝓪𝓬𝓻𝔂𝓶𝓪𝓻𝓲𝓪 𝓞𝓵𝓸𝓻 [Final]
It's time.
Tags/Warnings: Alien!Jungkook, Human!Reader, Size difference, sci-fi, Romance, strangers to lovers, fluff, suggestive, smut, unprotected because this is alien fantasy, kinda creampie idk
Length: 5.5k words
There is no taglist for this fic.
-> Masterlist
A/N: I hate how it turned out but you all always beg me to finish my shit so here you go.
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Jungkook watches fondly from the large windows of his main office at the castle how you feed the still unsteady animal out in the large gardens where it's home is placed, while Hoseok, one of his closest guards and advisors, watches you from close by.
The man has been tasked to basically watch over you when the king himself can't, and he takes his job very seriously, visibly- much to Jungkook’s approval.
"I heard that she was crying last night." Namjoon says, walking up behind the king who nods.
"Bitterly so." He admits, remembering the incident from hours prior when you'd sat close to the being as it passed, Jungkook offering you silent comfort. He wasn't sure why you were so upset- and why you even demanded to stay even though the situation had caused you so much distress. "She cared a lot for a being she used to be afraid of." He says.
Last night, Ikkan rebirthed. You had given the Is'oi a name after asking Namjoon for help to choose an appropriate one- settling for one that means 'deep blue' in native language. You had just gone out to 'say goodnight' to the being you'd played around with the entire day, just to call out Jungkook's name in clear distress, causing the King to instantly rush to you, fearing something might've happened. But instead, he found you, on your knees in front of the being you used to be so wary of- it's body clearly stiffening now in it's laying position, head barely moving anymore as it's eyes watched you with fondness. The glow had dimmed significantly, as the first scales fell from it's body, rotting like a flower that wilts away as it reached it's end.
He'd told you, reminded you that the being will be reborn tonight as well- but you still did not stop crying as you ran your hand over their head, offering comfort for what usually is left to the quiet of night. But Jungkook could not bring himself to tell you to leave, couldn't take that moment from you- going against his own culture to instead stay that night, watching the whole process for the first time as well.
And he could've sworn, he heard the large being purr, leaning against you as they rested their head in your lap, falling asleep one last time before Ikkan's chest no longer moved. And then, with no life left, they began to wilt away, body falling apart as they dissipated into nothing but ashes it looked like.
Until something moved.
Your eyes were wide as you watched the small, still somewhat blind being cry out into the night- but this time, their cries were being answered by a kind hand reaching out, softly brushing away the remnants of their last life. And Jungkook had felt a certain sense of pain in his heart he could not describe as you showed just how nurturing you are to things not even remotely resembling your own kind.
How would you be as a mother?
"She's a kind one." Namjoon agrees, pulling him out of his thoughts and memories. "Maybe a bit too kind." The advisor and doctor worries a bit.
"That won't be an issue." Jungkook shakes his head. "She's got me at her side." He exclaims, gaze softening quite a bit as you hold the bottle of nutrient feed up for the young rebirthed being to drink from. He's almost a bit jealous- you're spending a lot of time outside now, far away from him. He'll walk down to you soon though, wondering how you can not be cold with just your regular gowns on your body.
You're fragile. You get sick so easily.
"And yet there is no true claim on her yet." His friend teases, making Jungkook turn his head to glare at him. "You cannot be mad at me for pointing it out. It's painfully obvious to everyone- in fact, there's rumours already spreading." He says, and that catches Jungkook's full attention now. He doesn't like people talking negatively about you. You don't deserve to be spoken down to, especially not as a future queen, once he brings you officially into that job.
"And what, pray tell, are those rumours about?" He asks, eyes sharpening.
"That she is incapable of.. providing you." Namjoon teases, and Jungkook sighs, shaking his head as he crosses his arms, watching you in the gardens again instead. "How come? You had been very quick to connect with Hana." He asks, and Jungkook's gaze hardens.
"Because she practically demanded it." He growls. "It was necessary for her.. happiness, or at least that's what I believed, back then." He lowly says.
"And she does not want it?" Namjoon wonders. "Curious. Even though humans are such intimate creatures." he hums, standing next to Jungkook again.
"Oh she does. It's very clear in her behaviour." Jungkook almost smirks. "Her body is calling out to me almost every night." He admits.
"So?" His friend asks. "Why not take her then?" He questions, before he notices the deep thought in Jungkook's face. "You're worried."
"I am." The king admits.
"About what?" Namjoon wonders.
"I believe it is clear what I could possibly worry about, Namjoon." He says, looking at his friend. "You as a man with medical knowledge should know that more than anyone. Or are you not familiar with human anatomy compared to ours?" He almost teases, making Namjoon laugh.
"Oh I am aware!" He laughs. "Which is why I can tell you, that she will be just fine." He reassures.
"I was too much for even Hana." He reminds his friend. "Which is most likely why she searched for.. satisfaction somewhere else." He mumbles lowly to himself, averting his gaze.
"So you'll give up before even trying?" Namjoon clicks his tongue. "Ah well. I may be able to ask Jimin if he's up for the job then. Considering how humans connect love with intercourse-" He starts, making Jungkook instantly move to grab his arm, twisting it around as he backs Namjoon into a wall.
"You will not even think about such a thing." He growls.
"Then what?" Namjoon challenges. "You'll just leaver her lonely? Put your new love on the line just because you're a coward?" He asks, making Jungkook clench his jaw, eyes glowing for a second while his veins darken underneath his skin.
But he behaves himself, forces control, and lets go of Namjoon.
"You're right." He settles himself. "I should not.. think of her so lowly." He sighs, swallowing down his bubbling rage.
"Talk to her." Namjoon says gently. "I'm sure she'll understand where you're coming from if you just explain it to her."
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"Breathtaking." Jungkook comments, as you turn your heads while the maids bow at him, who leans against the doorframe, watching them help you dress and connect the chains over your body with decorative pliers. The chains hold jewels that sound like a windchime almost, a sound you've come to enjoy a lot.
As soon as the maids are done, they walk out, looking very much caught off guard and even quite shy at the soft 'thank you' Jungkook offers them as they pass him, something that's not common in his culture. As soon as the door closes, he walks towards you with a gentle smile, his own clothes looking expensive, and official. "You look just like the queen you are." He muses, and you laugh.
"About to be." You correct him, leaning into the hand on your cheek. "I'm a bit nervous." You admit, and he smirks.
"You are very nervous, my dear. Not just 'a bit'." He corrects as well, and your shoulders slump down as you admit defeat. "Do not worry. I'm there, and the people are already very fond of you and the changes you brought." He admits.
"Changes?" You wonder. "But I've done nothing." You ask him, confused.
"You did." He nods. "You changed me. And with that, you changed the way I rule this kingdom." He explains, as he adjusts your dress for you, fingers tracing the delicate jewelry decorating your body.
"What if they think you're weak now?" You worry instantly, and he shakes his head, smile never leaving his lips.
"They do not." He shakes his head. "A King is strongest with his people's trust placed in him. You'll see what I mean later." He offers, before he makes sure to adjust the soft pelt around your shoulders now to keep you warm.
As you both make your way through the halls, you wonder. You've never actually been in the town surrounding the castle grounds, only ever saw some of the outskirts and farmlands from afar. But today, you'll make your way into town- to show yourself to the people, your first official 'showing', as Jungkook had explained. It's a first- even with Hana, he's never shown her publicly like this. But with you, he wants to make that step.
He's serious about you, and your future. He's proving that today.
And the first glimpses of the town makes you realize what Jungkook had been talking about- because as soon as he's visibly to the people, they smile, wave, children run to him with opened palms as if to wait to receive something. And Jungkook does give something- his own hand brushing over their palms, a gesture that makes them smile and laugh in excitement. "It's a blessing." Hoseok mumbles from your other side, the man keeping his hand on his sword at his belt. "So that their work will always be fruitful." He explains, and you listen to it at full attention, when Jungkook laughs next to you, making you look at him- his eyes looking down at something.
Two children, young boys looking at you with dark red eyes and cat-like pupils similar to Jungkook's, hands opened towards you. You're a bit lost now, unsure what to do- so the king next to you takes your hand in his, and offers you guidance in how to do it- your fingers running over the warm palms of the two kids, who grin and laugh happily, before running back to their parents in the crowd gathered on the sides.
You repeat this action time after time, growing more comfortable and mostly confident in yourself the more you walk around in town, letting Jungkook explain to you where he grew up, showing you taverns and other places he remembers visiting often. It makes you remember that at some point, Jungkook was not considered royalty at all- just a regular young man, a boy, a child at some point, nothing out of the ordinary. And now, he's done what he said he would- he challenged the king, took the throne, and changed the ways that used to be the norm. Not just by taking you as his partner- but also in other ways.
As you sit in one of the bigger taverns, you can't help but watch with a constant smile how the people celebrate Jungkook almost, dancing around and drinking, though the King seems to stay away from the alcohol, for a reason you're not sure of. "Can she drink?" A young man asks, setting down another pitcher with water onto your table you sit at. "I apologize, I don't know much about humans." He apologizes.
"She can, but she shall not tonight." Jungkook answers for you. "I'd hate for her to too intoxicated to survive the way home." He chuckles, making everyone laugh, including you. You already know that you can't handle any of the liquor on this planet- something you realized way before you even met Jungkook in the first place.
"Oh, then I won't offer any!" The man says, bowing politely before he leaves you be. Jungkook keeps his arm around you, always makes sure that you're comfortable, noticing how the trip is taking a toll on you. For him, this isn't stressful at all- but you have a lot less energy than him to spend. So he's not surprised when he notices you trying to hide your yawns multiple times as soon as it gets dark outside, eyes growing heavy as you listen to the music played.
"You are so bewitching, you know that?" Jungkook teases, causing you to force yourself more awake again, looking at him in question. "I can sense the... nature of the gazes on you." He offers, a hand moving some of your hair out of your face.
"How fortunate for you that I'm not going home with any of them, then." You say, making him laugh openly.
"You're very right on that." He agrees. "And I believe we should head back now." Jungkook says, making you shake your head though.
"No, just a little longer." You complain, causing the king to chuckle.
"You are literally on the very edge of sleep, darling." He teases. "And I do not feel comfortable with having you in such a vulnerable state outside the castle walls, in front of people who should not see you that way." He gently says, nodding towards Hoseok to gather all the guards and knights to prepare for the journey back home. And god, does the way home drag.
You're barely able to somewhat make it back into the entrance hall of the large castle structure when Jungkook finally offers his help, carrying you up the stairs to the bedroom he shares with you. "You are so very fragile, my love." He teases you with a smile, helping you out of your jewelry and dress while you're almost falling asleep. "Did you enjoy it?"
"I did." You smile. "It was.. really fun. Even though I didn't really know what to do most of the time.." You mumble while Jungkook unravels your dress to help you out of it.
"You did great nonetheless." He reassures you, placing a kiss to your cheek. "You deserve to rest now."
And rest you do- falling asleep before he can even come to bed himself.
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The next day when you wake up and stretch your limbs, it's already way past the morning hours. A window is opened, letting in fresh air, familiar sharp crow sounds of the large predatory birds outside by now no longer a cause of fear for you. It's as if they've become familiar with you now- no longer trying to feast on you, instead only sometimes curiously poking their heads inside the room to observe you.
"You slept for ages." Jungkook chuckles next to you, making you turn in surprise. Usually, the king is gone before you wake up- it's unusual to have him beside you like this, eyes still wary from his own rest.
"It was a pretty eventful day yesterday." You defend yourself, and he nods, moving forward to kiss your lips. It's a gentle gesture, oddly slow, as if he's putting a lot of thought into it. "How come you're still in bed?" You ask, and he watches you for a moment, before he answers.
"I've been thinking." He admits, head leaning on his palm, elbow pushed into the bed below. His upper body is bare as usual in bed- but it's still a rather rare sight for you considering you typically don't spend moments like these together often. "About us. And our.. differences." He hums, while your eyes notice the scars he has- one of them right on top of his shoulder.
"Oh." You nod, unsure what he means.
"These past few days.. even longer than that.. there's been tension, hasn't it?" He asks, reaching out to move some hair from your face. "Sexual in nature, that is." He explains further, and you nod, eyes no longer able to stand his gaze now as you become a bit shy. Of course he’s able to speak about it a lot more open and boldly than you ever would be able to.
"I uhm.. yeah." You nod, remembering that moment you almost went that far- but he's never done anything further than playing around with you. "Is there.. a problem?" You ask, and he waits for a moment to answer.
"I'm not sure." He admits. "I have spoken to Namjoon about our obvious differences. And if we could make it work." He tells you. "But I'm worried nonetheless. I don't want to hurt you- but I am also aware of your growing frustration with me." He offers.
"I- its not like that!" You defend yourself immediately. "If you don't want to, you know, have sex with me, that's fine. I don't need it to be happy with you." You reassure him, and he smiles kindly.
"I know." He nods. "But do trust me that my lust for you is very real, and unbearable these days." He admits. "Even right now."
At that, you move, boldly so, seemingly catching even him off guard as he holds your waist, while you sit on his thighs. His gaze is heated, red in his eyes clearly telling you how much his control is challenged in this moment, as you place your hands on his abdomen. "Then what if you just trust me instead?" You wonder, while he watches you. "Give up control for once?" You ask.
"And you believe you can control a king?" He asks, challenges almost, as he very obviously stirs to live inside his underwear. "Very bold words." He smiles, though his worry does not leave his eyes at all as it returns full force, face becoming serious again.
"What's the problem?" You ask, feeling his hands run over your skin to your legs. "What are you so scared of?" You press, and he sighs.
"Hurting you." He reveals. "Losing you."
"Why would you lose me?" You ask, unsure.
"Because humans connect love with physical intimacy." He says. "And so does my kind. It's an important part of a partnership, and if I fail at providing you with the appropriate attention you deserve, I fear that I'm not valuable enough as a lover to you." He admits.
"Even if we can't have sex, I'll still stay with you." You shake your head, moving to sit next to him now, hand reaching out to hold his. "Love is more than just that to me. And I love you." You argue. "No matter your strength, or your status, or your worth. You've got worth to me no matter what." You confess.
And at that confession, he breaks.
The moment he sits up to lean closer to you to be able to kiss you with a hand on your cheek, you know that he won't stop this time. "You're so dangerous." He growls, hands uncaring of the fabric covering you as he pulls the gown over your head, revealing your almost entirely bare body to him.
It's time, and he knows it.
You've become much more to him than just a partner- you've become a lifeline, a reason to think over his challenges and dangers he faces in the choices he makes, just so he can stay alive and at your side. He would burn down the world for you, if it meant that it would keep you safe from all harm.
His kisses are heated, desperate, quite literally stealing your breath as he moves to mouth and bite at the skin of your neck and shoulder. He's noticeably not a gentle lover- he wants to make sure that his love is visible on your skin, needs to see the remnants of his lust for days to come. And with his control finally snapping, he will not hold back- he will test your strength for a final time, and devour you whole.
He wants to watch you bloom- wants to see your petals open to reveal the most beautiful flower created by simple chance on a planet so far away from his own. And yet, this flower was meant for him- to be kept forever, to have it plant it's roots into his heart so it can feed off his love until he dies and cannot provide any longer.
Only then he will set you free again. Only then will he accept defeat.
Your back arches into him as his hands adjust your position, laying you down once more beneath him, pulling off your underwear to reveal everything, soiled fabric thrown carelessly away. He's played around with you before, that's how far you've come at this point- but never quite past that. Something always kept him from giving you what you were yearning for- but this time, he's granting you your wish.
When he met you, truly face to face, it had been nothing but pure curiosity. He wanted to see what's so special about the human kind that others have such drastically varying opinions on them. Why one seems to fear them, while the other hates them.
He does neither.
You're not a being he has to fear, neither physically nor emotionally.
When you say you love him you mean it. When you're close to him you simply crave his company. When you ask him how he feels you're genuinely interested in his emotions. You've always been nothing but open and honest with him, had nothing to lose, and everything to gain. And yet even when given full freedom to do as you please and leave him if you wanted to, you stayed. Because you wanted to.
No words are exchanged as he sheds his clothes as well, leaving both of you bare beneath the silk covers of the bed you two share. "Are you cold, darling?" He asks, whispers almost with how close he is, in a way that gives away his amusement over your squirming body underneath his hands. You shake your head. He grins. "No?" He asks for you to confirm, and you do. "And yet your body is trembling. I wonder why.." He hums over your skin.
"Because you're torturing me!" You whine in complaint, turning to the side- something he does not approve of, as he grabs your hips to instead turn you over entirely, a strange tenderness in his rather rough manner of handling you into a new position. Like a predator warning, growling down your neck, but never slipping in his control, never actually making the kill. "You know, usually, this is how I'd take you.." He explains, and you push back into him at that, impatient, or maybe even quietly begging. You really don't care how he does it. Just that he does it. "..but I cannot. Not with you." He tells you, kissing the line of your spine from your neck down, before he lets you turn over once move to face him.
"Why not?" You ask, and he simply smiles, hands running down your sides until they meet your hips.
"Because I cannot see your face." He simply answers, before he leans over you to kiss you again. By now, it's evident that without even touching you, you're more than ready to take him on, body inviting him in every way it can- and this time, he can't hold back even if he wanted to.
You've waited long enough.
"And I want to savour this experience, and all that you'll offer me." He hums against your skin. "...as I claim you as mine for now and forever."
You're not used to.. sex being this big of a deal. But it's obvious to you that Jungkook sees this as more than just an act of simple lust and satisfaction, if the way he kisses down your chest to your belly button is anything to go by. He didn't lie when he said he'd savour it- he's going terribly slow.
"Jungkook please... I want you.. " you beg, and he smirks like the predator he is, faking innocence.
"Oh but you have me right here, my love?" He says, leaning his head on the bare skin of your hip for a second. "I'm not going anywhere." He teases.
Well- that's the problem.
"I want you to focus just on yourself." He suddenly says rather seriously. "No matter what." He adds, and you nod, unsure what he means by this. Satisfied by your answer however he moves back up, hovering over you while his hand feels you up between your legs. You're more than ready by now, inner thighs slick with your arousal, and it makes his already leaking length move a little at the feel of it all. Could you handle him if he really was to let go and chase his own pleasure?
Will you handle him in any way at all?
You're not her, and he reminds himself of that as he pushes himself inside your body, core warm and welcoming towards him despite the obvious stretch you have to go through to accommodate him. He's worried you might not be able to transform enough- but you surprise him, as you always do.
Inch by inch he slowly claims your body, waiting for the sign to stop- but you seem rather eager to take him in, never showing signs of discomfort at all. In fact, you look rather pleased- eyes closed, head laid back into the soft pillows below, hands holding his. He can see the slight bulge forming on your lower stomach, showing faintly where he is, and it makes him lust for you in ways that make him worry he might be going feral.
He's pressing himself against you now, wet sound escaping your cunt as he realizes there's nothing left of him to give you, your eyes hooded just like his as he slowly retracts himself, just to enter you again much faster than before.
The gasp that leaves him can't be controlled. Neither do you hide your own reaction, mouth opening silently in pleasure as you arch your back.
He wants to see it again, so he moves his hips once more, once more, steady pace, causing your body to rock along, chest swaying as if to hypnotize the king. There's no need for foul play like that however- he's already under your spell, no need for any kind of assistance.
"Your body was truly made for me.." he whispers into your neck as he continues his pace, holding himself back from snapping, keeping your well-being in mind.
"Please-" you whine breathlessly, and he eagerly leans in to kiss your neck, bite at it, mark you up for days to come.
"What is it you want?" He asks just as faintly, never losing track of his pace.
"Don't hold back." You say, eyes meeting his own. "Take me, my King."
"I'm yours."
He can't help the way his patience snaps, thrusts now deeper than ever as he pushes himself as far as he can with every move of his hips, kisses heated, burning, forever imprinting his love on you as he presses his hands into the bed below you, pace quickening. "I'll make the entire kingdom know." He growls against your lips as his hips snap against yours I'm a ruthless manner. "I'll have them all hear you come undone under my hand, just so they know-" He presses out between clenched teeth. "That you're mine, and that I'm yours."
Your legs move to wrap around his body as best as you can manage, your hands on his back as they accidentally scratch his skin faintly, his own hands grabbing roughly at your flesh to keep you still as he ruts into you, for the first time actually chasing his own release.
He need to fill you up, have his seed forever mark you up with his scent until it spills out of you. He's desperate at the prospect of finally gaining fulfillment in a way he's not managed to achieve before- a kind of high currently blurring up his thoughts as he feels himself getting lost in the scent and taste and feeling of your body.
You're a drug, and he's happily willingly getting addicted.
Your legs suddenly quiver as you find your own peak way sooner than he does, and he doesn't mind one bit seeing you come undone beneath him like this. A goddess in his eyes, gracing him with a heavenly touch, as he slows down, and slips out to see your core gaping from the stretch, clenching around nothing.
But you're not done with him, as he gets a taste of what you're capable of in the eyes of lust.
Your hands pull his face back towards you, your kiss a siren song clouding his mind once more as he falls into your spell, chasing his own high like a man starving.
And he is. He has been for way too long.
The moment he actually reaches his end you move your hand between the both of you to help yourself to another high as well, clenching core making him groan out in pure pleasure as he spills his seed into you, much of it already leaking out your core as you lazily move to milk him for all he's got.
His eyes have never looked so vibrant in color as he looks at you, visibly stunned.
And as you smile, no trace of any sort of doubt or anything other than pure and passionate love, he realizes you've finally bloomed.
Your bond falling into place, silently, as he kisses you once more.
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"Come here, love." Jungkook says one day, as you walk into the throne room, nodding politely to Min Yoongi- who you know by now from the scar over his eye and rather withdrawn attitude. You're not sure why he's here- but if the King feels comfortable with his presence, you trust that he is no threat to you or him at all in this situation. Jungkook has got his back turned towards you for a good while, before he turns, something held in his arms covered by cloth and golden jewels. "It is a gift from him to you." He says, as you move the delicate cloth of whatever he's holding in his arms, satin with finely woven golden patterns.
The small being opens its eyes slowly, before it raises its head- dog like creature visibly studying your face as Min Yoongi speaks.
"It is a gift sent with the most well wishes from my betrothed." He clarifies, as the white dog like being moves his head to inspect your hand held out to him, it’s fur so short that it feels more like velvet than anything else. You’re mesmerized by the puppy, before Yoongi looks almost annoyed. "...and it has also been.. Sent from me as well." he mumbles, as if he's forced to admit that part. "His name shall be for you to choose."
Jungkook laughs to himself as he sets the small being down, the white and lanky body shaking before it sniffs at your legs, tail wagging wildly. The young puppy is obviously still rather unsteady on his long legs, but he appears to figure out quickly that you're his main person from now on.
"Thank you." You tell the rather grumpy looking King with a smile, and you could swear he even returns it-
somewhat.
"He'll grow into a proper guard if well trained." Yoongi explains with his gaze set on Jungkook, who nods. "...That is not just a statement." He mumbles, and Jungkook rolls his eyes.
"I am aware." He bites back, and you can't help but smile at their brotherly bantering, long having gotten used to their more rough way of speaking to one another. Just like you've grown used to a lot of things on this planet-
after all, you consider this home by now.
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"Etka!" You call, as the dog like being runs on fast legs towards you, broad collar decorated with gems as he finds his place next to you, eagerly accepting your praise and affection.
He's grown a lot these past few months- almost to full height, according to Jungkook. The haatra has his place in front of your shared quarters where he sleeps every night, guarding you both at your most vulnerable states.
"Min Yoongi has invited us to the showing ceremony of his to-be queen." Jungkook says as you enter the bedroom after saying goodnight to your newest guardian outside the bedroom door.
"I'm happy for him." You say, joining him to sit on his lap at the table near the window. "He sounded very happy last time we spoke."
"He did not sound any different than usual to me, love." He shakes his head a little, before he leans in to kiss you. "But enough about him.. I have a different thing I'd like to indulge in than chatter about my brother." He offers you, who teasingly leans away from him, eyes falling to his lips.
"Oh? I wonder what that might be.." you mumble, as he adjusts your position a bit, hands shamelessly traveling beneath your gown to feel the warmth of your skin.
"Something that has no need for talking at all.." he hums against your lips, eyes hungry as he lusts for you with clear intentions.
"And yet you surely won't be quiet."
#bts imagine#bts fanfic#bts fic#jungkook imagine#jeon jungkook x reader#jeon jungkook imagine#bts jungkook imagine#bts smut#bts jungkook fanfic#jungkook x reader#jungkook smut#bts jungkook x reader#jeon jungkook imagines#jungkook imagines#jeon jungkook fanfic
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All that I ask is that you stay with me | Inner Demons
⟫ Alphabet Challenge, A - All that I ask is that you stay with me
Pairings: leah williamson x teen reader, arsenal wfc x teen reader
This is some angst that I thought to write because, well, life's been hard recently and I need a creative outlet to get my emotions out on paper and well, this is the result.
It might not be great and it's not been proof-read at all, so uh, yeah... Let me know what you all think but please be kind :)
And if any of you have any ideas of things to write, I'm open to write anything, within reason of course. My asks are open so feel free to drop anything in there :)
The battle with your inner demons are hard. You sometimes wonder if it's better to leave the world, making the decision without the realisation of how loved you are by the team of girls around you.
TW: heavy angst, SH, MH and talks of suicide and death.
"Y/N are you in there? Hurry up, we're about to start the film" The loud voice of Katie shouts aloud from the other side of the closed bathroom door to alert you of your attention.
You were joined by the girls in a classic team bonding night, a good ol' fashioned film to watch with some sugary treats, curtousy of it being a cheat day.
You are always so excited to spend time with the older girls, you all looked up with some much respect, being a part of the team for a while, you'd grown to love the girls like your own family.
Despite how well you fitted in at the club and how amazing you played football, there would always be people to put you down.
And in this case, it was in the forms of social media.
The internet could be a cruel place sometimes.
"Ye... Yeah, alright. J... Just a minute, I'll be right out" You shakily reply as you held the blade out in front of you while it stared back at you, almost like it was almost taunting you to use it.
Old habits are easy to break, you should have knew that.
It wasn't long before you were slumped on the bathroom floor as you watched the crimson liquid trickle down your arms. It felt like a rush of instant relief to the pain that you currently indured.
One small cut to take away the pain, you thought it would be okay.
Two cuts, you just wanted to chase the rush of the first.
Three, four and five, you realise you may have messed up.
You were doing so well, you had been on the right path to get help. that was needed. You had been clean for a numerous amount of days and just in that instant, the snap of a finger and all of that progress, had just been so easy to unwravle again.
You found it so easy to take a hold of the blade in your hand, press it against your wrist and pierce the skin.
It was a feeling of euphoria that you hadn't felt in a while, it was something that was needed.
The cuts were deep, too deep that even with added pressure, they wouldn't stop bleeding.
"Is this the end now?" You had to question yourself as your eyelids felt heavy, you were so tired and you didn't have it in you to fight anymore.
Was it really that easy to leave a world full of heartache and pain?
Maybe so,
At least you had thought that as you hear the sudden loud bang of the bathroom flying open and clashing against the wall.
"Y/N!" It was Leah's shrill voice that screams out in a panic, her eyes widened in fear as she stares at you. "Y/N, can you hear me?!" she questions with a a quiver in her tone.
"L... Le" You slur her name as you look at the blonde as you can feel yourself slipping into a state of unconciousness.
"Stay awake, Y/N. You have too-- Girls, help!" Leah continues to shout aloud for any of the girls to hear. " You hear me, Y/N? You have to stay awake" she pleads as her tears threaten to spill.
"S' okay, Le. L... Let me go. It's time" You tell her quietly as your eyes flutter between being open and shut.
"No, Y/N. You can't give up... You can't" Leah cries openly, the tears at bay have now escaped. "Stay with me, Y/N. Stay with me, please" she adds, her voice becomes louder as hot tears roll down her cheeks.
The rest of the girls all heard Leah's panicked voice and dart in the direction of the bathroom, each of them gasping in shock to find you slumped on the floor.
"Shit-- Y/N" Beths' eyes widen in fear and panic as she takes in the scene in front of her.
"What happened?" Viv questions, alarmed by the sight.
"S... She's hurt herself" Leahs' panicked voice speaks aloud while she's crouched down on the floor and pressing a towel against your wrists to try and soak up the blood. "I... I can't get the bleeding to stop" she tells them.
"Somebody call an ambulance, quick" Katie states as she joins Leah's side to kneel down and try to help in way that she can.
Her usual joking manner has suddenly turned into fearful and that's when the girls all knew this was serious.
"I'm on it" Jen agrees as fishes her phone out of her pocket, dialing 999 and waiting for an answer on the other side. "I need an ambulance, as soon as possible. It's urgent! My team mates' hurt herself and is in and out of unconciousness" the scots' woman speaks aloud,
"Stay with me, Y/N. Stay with me, keep your eyes open please" Leah pleads as she continues to hold the now blood-soaked towl against your skin, her own tears freely spilling down her cheeks as you daze in and out of sleep.
"W... Why would she do this to herself" Steph questions concerned as she glances at you, heartbroken it had come to this.
"I don't know, she was... she was doing better" Lia spoke out, swallowing the lump in her throat as she tried to keep her own emotions in check.
"At least, we thought she was" Beth mumbles as she struggles to take her eyes off your unconcious body.
"She'll be okay, she has to be" Caitlin adds in with vulnerability in her voice that wasn't usually shown to anyone, other than you.
You were the baby of the team, all of the girls were overprotective of you ever since you joined. It wasn't a secret that you had them all virtually wrapped around your pinky finger.
All the girls knew it was hard for you, you had a lot of expectation to live up to and knew that eventually, the pressure would be too much for you and you would break.
They were all there the last time, they saw the good, the bad and the damn right ugly and vowed to not let it happen again.
But, old habits are easy to break, right?
"Ambulance is on it's way. It won't be long" Jen tells the girls.
"I'm going with her" Leah was quick to say. A tone in her voice which the rest of the girls knew to not object against.
You were close with the girls but compared to them, Leah was pretty much your second-mum, older sister figure all rolled into one and she was the one that you always came to when it got tough.
Why didn't you just speak to her? Then maybe things could be different.
"We'll follow you to the hospital" Kim replies to the blonde and the rest of the girls all nod in agreement, they would always be there for you at a time when you most needed it.
They were your family, and family never turned their back on another.
#arsenal x reader#woso x reader#arsenal women x reader#leah williamson#woso#woso imagine#woso fanfics#heavy angst#leah williamson x reader#arsenal wfc x reader
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wishful thinking. (06)
chapter six: like lightning
summary: the instruction was plain and simple: no strings attached. but you should’ve known from the beginning that it could never apply to you and him.
pairing: minho x f!reader
rating: 18+ (minors dni)
genres/warnings: friends to lovers, friends with benefits au, college au; fluff, angst, smut; mentions of sex, swearing, this chapter is also pretty mild in terms of warnings? the angst begins here tho !!! could've been more edited but yk lol
word count: 4.9k
as always, i’d appreciate any thoughts or comments you may have, and please drop a like and/or reblog if you enjoy reading ♡
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If I never laid eyes on you
Would I feel something missing?
If you never laid eyes on me
Would you know something’s gone?
Happy Accidents - Saint Motel
You don't know if you've ever changed, even once, in your life.
You feel like you're still 8 years old and your best friend is the neighbors' elderly dog that they let you play with every weekend. She's a golden retriever, and she would stand taller than you if she could walk on two legs.
You're still 16 and your happiest memories are of a boy who doesn't love you back. But all of your friends say that he does, and oh, how much you want to believe that their words are true.
And at the same time, you're 22, just a few months shy of 23, sitting in front of a canvas showcasing your own bleeding heart. Your growing pains, laid out by acrylics and gentle brush strokes. You liken yourself to the figure in front of you, the one that's standing in the corner of your painting, overlooking a sea of blues and grays. There's a piece of you that's left behind in everything you create. Sometimes, you leave it there on purpose, a memorabilia for your future self to look back at fondly.
You think of everything in your life that has changed and how you're the only thing that has managed to remain the same. The dog eventually dies and the boy moves on with his life. The passage of time is relentless but you seem to be the only one who can't keep up with the tireless flow. You're always running in place, always stuck behind in the end. There's a past in which you still live, one where you don’t know if you'll ever make it out of.
You think of home and the search comes up empty, like it does every single time. Home isn't here inside of your own body, nor is it within the four walls of your childhood bedroom. You've never felt like you belong anywhere. Everything is always fluctuating, constantly and unabatingly spinning and spinning and spinning when all you're asking for is a minute to stand still and catch your breath.
Home isn't always a place, that much you know. Maybe home isn't even a thing that you build but something that you find, in a person or a touch, in a feeling or a scent. Perhaps that's the problem, isn't it? Home is something you find, and you've spent your whole life searching.
People say your early 20s are supposed to be the best years of your life but that sentiment has never resonated with you. These are the years that you spend in excruciating limbo, where you're not an adult but you're forced to be anyway. The years where loneliness is an invisible friend that shadows you day in and day out, a presence you don’t want around but can't seem to shake off, a haunting that's far too gentle to be considered such. These aren't your best years; these are your saddest years.
None of it helps build character. It just hurts.
It hurts. You accept that it hurts. You keep on living, always accompanied by the hurt. At some point, it stops bothering you as much; you've grown numb to the way it stings, but it doesn't mean that there aren't days where you're pierced with a sudden and debilitating hollowness in your chest.
Here you are, half an adult but still a child, wondering if you know anything more than you did when you were 8.
You just want to go home, but you don't know where home is.
You look at the small pool of yellow acrylic paint that's been sitting on your palette for a while now. It feels so out of place among the other insipid tones, even though that has always been your intention - a burst of life amidst a sea of blues.
You don't think about anything in particular when your fingers pick up a brush and dab it in a generous amount of paint. It doesn't make much sense, but it feels right. You don't think about anything in particular when your hand smears the color on the cavas, on the figure, a startling stroke right in the center of her chest, contrasting all of the dulls and darkness surrounding.
Though, you do think of him afterward. Of him and daffodils and spring.
The rest of your friends are already present when you and Felix show up at Chan and Jess' shared apartment, holding boxes of pizzas and a case of beer.
It's a cute tradition that was started last year, when all of you promised to gather the final Friday of every month to have a cozy little dinner party among yourselves. It usually takes place at Chan's, since his apartment is bigger than the rest of yours, and because him and Jess are practically the parents of the group anyway.
The second you step into the living room, a chorus of groans erupts all around. Hyunjin and Jisung are the most vocal petulant babies, pouting from their seats, complaining that you two took too long and that they've been starving for hours.
You and Felix shrug off your jackets before delegating the tasks to the lot of them, since you were in charge of picking up the food for tonight. Minho and Seungmin grabbing plates and cups from the kitchen for Changbin and Jeongin to set on Chan's large coffee table.
You opt for a seat on the carpeted floor, next to the spot on the cream-colored couch where Minho left his phone, feeling more comfortable this way since the table is a little low for your liking. They come back a few minutes later, and you smile up at Minho when he reclaims his seat on the couch.
"Hi." He smiles back, smoothing a hand over your hair in greeting.
"Hi," you say. Even a touch so simple warms you up from the outside chill you were in mere minutes ago. No one else notices his lingering hand on you, or it's just such a you and Minho thing to be mildly affectionate with each other that the others don't care to comment on anymore.
You all fall into easy conversation soon after everyone starts digging in, chatting amongst yourselves as you always do. You and Hyunjin lament about your respective projects, reiterating the frustration that you've already expressed through your texts for the zillionth time. Chan and Jess nag Jeongin about introducing his girlfriend to the group, to which the younger one responds with an exaggerated groan as one would when their parents ask about grandchildren, though he does placate them by promising to bring her along the next time there's a party.
You don't care enough to tune into Minho's conversation with Changbin and Felix about the new gym they started going to. You do, however, catch Changbin's attempt to tease Minho. A playful scoff, followed by, "Minho lost his abs ages ago."
Your response is automatic and therefore, it doesn't warrant much thought from you before the words are tumbling out of your mouth. "No, he has abs. They're still there."
You don't recognize the weight of your words until you notice all chatter has halted, and you look up to find all eyes on you.
"How do you know that?" Jeongin is the one to voice everyone's collective thought, puzzled, a little surprised.
"Yeah, isn't Minho notoriously weird about that stuff?" Felix adds.
You blink in a daze, and you don't know if your face is reddening because of embarrassment but you sure hope that it isn't. The mouthful you're munching on gives you a reason to stall, your reputation of being a slow eater makes the excuse more believable when you don't answer right away.
As subtly as you can, you nudge Minho's leg with an elbow. He just laughs, though you're pretty certain he can tell that you're internally freaking out.
"I was walking her home from class a few weeks ago and we got caught in the rain. She let me come up to her apartment to change," he says calmly.
You remember that day. He was walking you from campus back to yours, so that part was true. But it didn't start raining until you were both sheltered in the comfort of your apartment, with him on top of you as he fucked you nice and slow on the couch. You didn't know when the rain stopped, but it must've been some time during your shower that you offered him to join with the innocent intention of cleaning yourselves up and saving water, only for him to end up on his knees with his face between your legs and his fingers buried deep inside of you. He'd made you come three times that afternoon, then took you out to udon afterward.
"And you just... changed in the middle of her living room or something?" Changbin asks, his eyes narrowing slightly.
Minho shrugs, completely nonchalant. "Yeah."
The silence in the room persists as you swallow down the bite. Their stare lingers on the pair of you, then they turn to look at each other like they're speaking a secret language that you're unfamiliar with. Why is it such a scandalous thing for you to see Minho without a shirt? You've seen your other guy friends shirtless numerous times before, when all of you are hanging out in someone's apartment on particularly hot summer days.
Though, they aren't wrong. The arrangement between the two of you muddles your memory, but you don't really remember seeing Minho flaunt his bare skin often before.
You're about to squeeze out a weak response to aid Minho's explanation, but your friends just start nodding along in acceptance.
"I guess that makes sense. If there's anyone who would see him naked, it'd be Y/N."
This definitely makes you blush. Minho laughs again.
"What?! I did not see him naked."
Well, look who's a liar now?
"Y/N, and whoever he's banging," Hyunjin supplies, which seriously doesn't help the flush on your cheeks at all.
"Why would it make sense that it was me?" you protest.
"Because you're his favorite." Jess is the one who answers, to which the rest of your friends all hum in agreement. The way they're reacting makes it seem as though it's just a fact of life that you're Minho's favorite, and that whatever boundary he lets you cross or whatever rule he breaks when it comes to you is simply a result of this fact.
Not once has it crossed your mind that everyone might have a favorite person in the group, but now that it's been said, you quickly conclude that Minho would be your favorite too (your secret arrangement notwithstanding.)
You glance up at him, seeking reassurance with a curious blink. "Am I?"
"You're alright," is what he tells you in lieu of a confirmation. "The least annoying one."
And you don't know if it's the way he speaks ever so gently when he looks at you or how his lips curl up in a knowing smile that sends a tingle of warmth down your spine. Or perhaps the culprit is the softness in his sharp eyes that makes you a little dizzy, makes a pair of butterflies go rampant at the pit of your stomach, as though they're prepared to soar when the ardor of spring begins to thaw the winter frost.
Chan laughs, "That's practically a declaration of love from Minho."
At one point, Hyunjin looks around and comments with a mouth stuffed full of pizza, "Wow. We are literally perfectly divided."
All eyes fall onto him, clearly no one is catching his drift.
Hyunjin swallows his food and washes it down with a big sip of beer before gesturing vaguely at the group, "All the singles are on the floor."
You look at the people on the couch while they stare back at you, Hyunjin, Seungmin, Changbin and Felix sitting comfortably on the fluffy rug.
"I'm single," Jisung says, pointing at himself. "Should I get on the floor?"
"No, you're not," Seungmin says flatly.
"What?"
"Didn't you get back together with your ex girlfriend?"
"What?" Jisung practically squeaks out. "Man, what are you talking about?"
"I live with you. We literally share a wall. I heard you last week. The whole two hours."
“You were home?!”
"My shoes were by the door. I had dishes in the sink. I went to the bathroom to pee several times."
Jisung gasps, growing redder and redder as more eyes start diverting their attention to him. He opens his mouth only to promptly close it as he thinks of what to say. Repeats the process a few times. "We didn't hear you. You never said anything," is what he settles on stuttering out. Then, "Why didn't you bring it up? Why do you have to air out my dirty laundry now?"
"It's more entertaining to embarrass you in front of everyone." Seungmin shrugs, and ignores Changbin's subsequent comment calling him a pervert. "And no wonder you didn't hear me. You were going at it like you were rabid."
"Wait," Jeongin says, "when did you even get back together?"
"We didn't. It's complicated! We're just… y'know…"
When Jisung trails off sheepishly with the bright blush still apparent on his cheeks, Minho cuts in, finishing his sentence bluntly, "Boning."
You send him a glare from where you're seated on the floor, to which he just gives you a lopsided grin and nudges you with his knee.
While everyone else is busy bombarding Jisung with questions on potentially getting back together with his ex, Minho quietly slithers down to the floor like a stealthy cat, squeezing himself into the space between you and Felix. Minho rests his arm behind you on the couch, leaving it stretched out comfortably on the cushions, just lightly touching your back. Usually, when you two are alone, he would have his arm wrapped around your shoulders so he could pull you close, until you're safely tucked into his side where you would remain on most of your evenings spent together. But for now, he leaves his arm where it grazes you only slightly as you sit among friends, with the exception of his hand reaching to play with your hair once in a while.
"Hey!" Hyunjin practically screeches, pointing at Minho when he notices. "Why did you get on the floor?"
"What?" Minho asks innocently. "You said the singles are on the floor."
"You're not single. You have a girlfriend."
"I don't have a girlfriend."
Hyunjin scoffs. "You have a sneaky link."
"Hmm, not the same as a girlfriend."
"Why can't you just tell us, man? There's gotta be something else you're hiding."
You stay quiet, still as a statue while they bicker back and forth, like the mere motion of your breathing could give your secret away. You don't doubt that Hyunjin has been hounding Minho about his new discovery ever since the night of Yeonjun's party, but Minho seems unfazed about it, evading Hyunjin's badgering with a calm composure that's distinct to no one else.
You excuse yourself to the bathroom, quickly shuffling away as if your absence at the table would help make things seem less suspicious for Minho. You splash some water on your face, wait for a while until it feels like an appropriate amount of time has passed for them to have already moved onto another topic. You are, quite literally, hiding from your own friends.
Moments later, you re-enter the room with gentle footsteps and a certain tension in your spine, but you soon grow relieved when you find that the conversation has somehow shifted to Seungmin and his on-again off-again not-girlfriend, about which he just seems kinda sad for a few seconds before he's telling everyone to fuck off and mind their own business, always quick to conceal any and all emotions. He's similar to you in that way, you suppose.
You sit back down next to Minho who's still on the floor, though you put a little distance between your bodies that wasn't previously there. You don't know if it's enough to be noticeable, but he does look at you for a brief moment before leaning a bit closer, asking softly so only you could hear, "Walk you home later?"
You embark on the familiar route from Chan and Jess' place back to yours. It's not that late, barely even 10PM on a Friday night, but the streets are almost deserted. Barely anyone tipsily roaming the streets with their friends in tow; just a few cars passing by every now and then. You relish in the peace and quiet, sighing softly to yourself as you walk in the crisp evening air.
Minho takes casual strides next to you, letting his hand brush against your hand for a while until his pinky finds its way around yours. The tranquility of the city is nice, but being with Minho is even nicer.
Just some of the stars have come out to play, though the way they gleam and glimmer is enough to make up for what they lack in numbers. It's easy to get lost tonight, when you're looking up at an infinite sky with little light and only Minho's pinky hooked around yours like an anchor to guide you back home.
In the grand scheme of things, you're just a speck of dust. You're young and confused - 23 is still a child in your mind - and most of all, you're insignificant. Not in a self-disparaging way. Maybe in the literal sense of the word would be more accurate.
You are insignificant, merely a face among billions of faces. In a crowd of hundreds, or maybe only dozens, you're not someone who would stand out and be picked. Sometimes, it's nice to blend right in and hide in plain sight; you don't particularly enjoy being under the spotlight anyway. But sometimes, it's lonely to be just a drop in the ocean. You could sink right to the bottom and no one would even notice.
Maybe that's why you enjoy being around Minho so much. He makes you feel safe, and seen, like you matter in the end. He makes you feel like if you were to disappear one day, there's a person out there who would go to the ends of the earth in search of you.
You hope that he sticks around, that he wants to be in your life for as long as you can have him. You're not sure what it is that makes you sick to your stomach at the mere thought of losing him; perhaps because you know you will never come across another one like Minho in your lifetime. There's nobody else that can make you feel the same way he does.
I don't want to lose you. You're the only good thing I have.
An intersection, two left turns, and your apartment building comes into view all too soon.
"Wanna come up?" you ask bashfully. The streetlights do a good job at masking your light flush.
"I can't tonight," he says, a little apologetic. "I'm going to my parents' house first thing in the morning."
"Oh." You're disappointed for no specific reason. Sure, you were practically glued to Minho's side for most of the evening, but you were also surrounded by the very friends who are unaware that you two have been sneaking around behind their backs. It's been about over a week since you hung out with him alone, which isn't that long ago by any means, but still. "For the weekend?"
"Yeah, just for the weekend."
There's a selfish urge, just a tiny one, to ask him to come for a while anyway, maybe only twenty minutes or so, but you swallow it down and wave it away. "Okay, have fun. Say hi to the cats for me."
"I'll send you pictures," he tells you. "They miss you, y'know."
You smile at that, laughing a little. "They've met me once."
Last fall, you and your friends all took a weekend trip to Minho's childhood home for his birthday. It was fun for you, though you're not sure how much his parents actually enjoyed it, considering they had to house and feed almost a dozen kids that weren't their own. You remember the cats, of course you do, and how Soonie took an immediate liking to you, how he mostly hovered around your personal space whenever you were in the house.
"No, seriously. My mom says Soonie meows your name once a day."
You throw him an eye roll, accompanied by a light punch to his shoulder.
"Goodnight, Min," you say. "Text me when you get home."
"Okay."
Even after that, the two of you still stay rooted to the spot, your pinkies interlocked. Minho's gaze doesn't leave your face, and for a moment there, it feels like most of the stars didn't show up because they all left to gather in his eyes.
"Can't go up if you don't let me,” you quip, glancing at your hands, knowing full well that you can easily retract your finger if you want to.
His eyes stay on you for just a moment longer. "Let me kiss you," he asks softly, releasing your pinky only to take your hand in his, tugging you closer until you’re all up in each other's personal space.
You blink at him, your heart caught somewhere in your throat. You're close enough that you can feel the warmth radiating off his body. "Min…" you murmur but you don't actually know what you want to tell him, so the nickname hangs like an idle lantern in the bubble of space between your faces.
"Just a goodnight kiss."
"Friends don't kiss," you say meekly, reminiscent of your conversation over a week ago.
"Friends don't have sex either," he repeats.
"But we’re not having sex."
"You asked me to come upstairs. What do you think we would've done?"
And he's right. If he had agreed to come up, then you would probably be pressed against the door right now, with his hands trailing down your body, removing every article of clothing they find, his lips kissing every exposed patch of skin along the way.
Minho would've been kissing you regardless - anywhere and everywhere, and you wouldn't have had any qualms about it like you do right now, even though you want to kiss him too.
"Maybe I wanted you to come up to make you peel tangerines for me while we watch a movie."
He says nothing to that, only grins amusedly and leans in to nudge his nose against yours. It's so cute that you can't help but mirror the quirk of his lips. You're sure that no one else gets to see this version of him - the one that boops you like an overly affectionate cat and smiles like you're his favorite person not just in your little group, but in the whole wide world.
"I haven't kissed you all week," he murmurs, his voice so gentle in the quietude that surrounds you. "You were right there but I couldn't kiss you all night."
You lose yourself in his brown eyes, the same eyes that hold nothing but sincerity and fondness for you. The stars here are brighter than the ones overhead.
"Let me kiss you," Minho says, "please?"
You cave. Of course you do.
The first glide of his lips over yours has you weak in the knees. Something sinks in as he kisses you deeply. Under the streetlights, not surrounded by your familiar four walls like a long lost secret but out in the open where anyone can see, even though there's not a single soul around.
Again, tears well up behind your eyelids the same way they did that morning you woke up next to him for the first time. You don't know what it is, never felt this way around anyone except for him. It's akin to the feeling of finally coming home after being away for a long time, or at least that's what you think that's how it would feel.
You don't want to be caged in by the walls of your own making. You want to be seen, and you want to be seen by him. You're the remnants of snow and ice stuck between cracks in the sidewalk, and he is warmth. You're a mosaic of a daffodil garden caught in an endless winter, and he is spring. Minho is the brief but wonderful moment when cherry blossoms have yet to fall from their branches, but green leaves are already growing impatiently, resulting in the beautiful coexistence of pinks and greens if only just for a few days.
You let him kiss you until you're both out of breath, let him wrap his strong arms around your body and hold you like he could mend all of your broken pieces. Maybe he could. Maybe you'd like him to make you whole again.
When Minho pulls away, he doesn't stray very far. He puts enough distance between your faces so you can catch your breath. But even then, you have a hard time getting air back into your lungs. He's looking at you like he would pick the moon for you if you asked, like moving mountains is no more difficult than peeling tangerines for you whenever you get a craving.
The streetlights are dim, but the stars in his eyes are bright enough to tell you something that his words don't.
It hits you all at once, in a moment where even the wind is still, as if it's been reduced to a mere spectator, watching the two of you with bated breath on the sidelines. The tipping point can be something as simple as him asking - almost pleading - to kiss you goodnight with no ulterior motive, no other intention than because he wants to. As though it would kill him if he had to go another minute without kissing you.
You realize why he's the yellow to your sea of blues, why you're so happy every time you look at the bracelet on your wrist. You realize why you feel so safe around him, why he makes you experience emotions that no one else can. You realize why you don’t like hearing about Hana, or any other person in the same sentence as his name with the implication that he could be romantically involved with them.
You realize why you kissed him for the first time all those months ago, and it wasn't because you were sad and he just happened to be there and let you cry on his shoulder. The times that your friends would tell you how you and Minho would be perfect together - you wanted it to be true. You knew it was true - that he was someone you could love, the only person who's worth opening up to. You kissed him because you wanted to love him. You realize why it made you soar when he kissed you back, because you wanted him to love you too.
You realize why the thought of losing this friendship terrifies you. You realize why you asked him to stay that night after the party and the club, even though you had never allowed him to sleep over before. You realize why the other week you let him only kiss you and nothing else, and you realize why your heart is hammering in your chest this very second, why your knees are weak, why you can't really breathe here in the middle of an empty street under a moonless sky, just because he's looking at you as if it's not the sun that the earth revolves around but rather, it's a girl who has never learned how to say what she means.
You're good at leaving things alone; it's a skill that you've unintentionally mastered over the years. Nothing has to change if you let it remain the same. And yet, the one exception always seems to be Minho, and you're a mirror of yourself when you're with him. You like the version of you that only he's able to bring out, and he does it effortlessly every time. He pulls happiness out of you so easily that it's hard to ignore what you feel for him, hard to convince yourself that what you harbor for him is still only platonic affection.
It comes bubbling up to the surface without your permission. It strikes you the same way lightning splits open the whole sky on a cloudless night, abrupt and unmistakeable. Love isn't something that you've ever come close to, and you have always been an unbeliever when people answer "You just know," in response to "How do you know when it is love?"
Though as you stand right here, right now, you think maybe this is what love is supposed to look like, personified with starry eyes and shallow dimples when he smiles.
Before he leaves, Minho presses another sweet kiss to your cheek. You're still dazed by the dawning, overwhelmed by the recognition that you can only mutter a stupid "Bye," when he bids you good night.
As you watch him go, there's something else you realize, almost tragically, that you've always been a ruiner. You run away the moment shit starts getting too real, even if it means letting beautiful things slip through your fingers like running water.
Love just isn't something you've ever learned to hold.
all rights reserved © withleeknow. reposting, translating and/or modifying is not permitted by any means. [posted 15.04.2024]
#stray kids fic#stray kids imagines#stray kids x reader#skz fic#skz imagines#skz x reader#skz x you#lee know fluff#lee know angst#lee know smut#lee know scenarios#lee know x reader#lee know imagines#lee know x you#lee minho x reader#lee minho x you#stray kids#lee know#lee minho#fic: wishful thinking
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"You know, I kind of get it now," Gem says to Impulse.
"What?" Impulse says. He's nervously playing with a frozen shard in his hands. Come on, Impulse, head into the dungeon, don't be shy, you can do it. Keep hyping yourself up, you didn't die horribly last time. Ugh, he wishes he were a little less into the game, or maybe more uncomplicatedly addicted, like Gem; it would make everything easier if he thought he could either just leave or play.
"I get it now!" Gem says. "Oh, stop debating if you'll go in like that, either do it or don't."
"I'm trying, Gem!"
"Yeah, but if you aren't gonna do it, I want a go."
"You used all your shards."
"In principle!" Gem says. "It's the principle! You wouldn't get it. You don't hang out here nearly as much as I do. You don't understand, understand the vibes." She sticks out her tongue at him for good measure.
"Well, inform me of the vibes, and maybe I'll work up the nerve," Impulse says.
"It's like--I get it now," she says. "When you were complaining earlier this season about Tango not going outside, I was like, aw man, you redstoners and your caves. I'm a sunshine girl. I like trees. And bloodshed."
"Don't see how those things are related but continue," Impulse says.
"I thought you were complaining because Tango is equally lame as you are about stuff like 'going outside' and 'talking to people who don't drag him into it'," Gem clarifies.
"I go outside!" Impulse says. "I go outside all the time! I ran a rebellion! I pranked you and Pearl! I yelled at Grian! I helped cover the perimeter! I have a whole island and a giant shop! I got a job with Scar! I even went through the Rift! I don't know what you want from me, here. It's not like I'm Tango. I did things that weren't my base from time to time."
"The lady doth protest too much," Gem says.
Impulse sighs. Gem laughs and hops into the air and squeezes herself into a gap between the walls near the entrance to the dungeon. Impulse has seen her in there a lot recently; it's almost like she's a gargoyle, or an inlaid relief for the dungeon. Weird thing to think about his friends, but--
"Besides," Gem continues. "Besides. I just said I get it now."
And something about that makes the hairs on Impulse's arm stand on-end.
"You get why we have to work so hard on circuit design?" Impulse asks hopefully.
"No, I don't get the redstone stuff, that's all still stupid nerd stuff," Gem says cheerfully.
"Jock," Impulse says.
Gem smirks meanly. "Script kiddie."
"Ow, that hurts. And it's not even true. Where did you even learn that one, you just admitted you hate that stuff!"
"Lady never tells her secrets," Gem says.
"Well, if you don't understand the redstone, what do you understand?" Impulse asks.
"Just--you really could stay in here forever, couldn't you? It'd be fun while you did it! I even built a tree and everything. Not much I have to leave for anymore, is there?"
Impulse swallows. Ah.
"Except when you run out of shards," he says, after a painful long several seconds in which there's a rock in his throat and he can't breathe and he has to try very hard to find an excuse to refute that.
"Yeah, except for that. Why did Tango have to go and limit how many times we can go in, huh? If I didn't get bored halfway through the week I think I could just move in!"
And Impulse--
Impulse thinks of Tango.
"Yeah," he says. He plays with the frozen shard in his hands. It feels very cold. "I wonder why."
"So? Are you gonna run or not? I want to mock you when you die," Gem says.
"...I might as well spend them all sooner rather than later," Impulse says, and he puts the shard in the barrel. His heart skips a beat as the door opens. Gem cheers. He shakes his whole body to shake off the conversation as he goes inside. It never does, after all, to try to run the dungeon while distracted.
#hermitcraft#a bee fic#decked out 2#impulsesv#geminitay#SO GEM BASICALLY LIVES IN DECKED OUT HUH.#staring at the 'tango gets eaten by his base' continuity. that's not concerning at all.#...i have no idea why i thought i was done with this continuity BEFORE decked out opened i should have known better
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Since my hazbin hotel concept didn't really go over the characters reactions to the readers dissaperrance, I thought I'd go over it here.
masterlist
---
Charlie
Charlie is so, so very sad. She doesn't know what she did wrong, why would you leave? Part of her wonders if it's her, if it's the hotel, maybe she did something wrong and now you're gone.
Charlie devotes all her time into finding you, you have to be somewhere. But after days and days of looking and finding nothing, not even a trace, she starts to feel like it's hopeless.
Charlie switches between intense depression and motivation constantly. She'll spend weeks in her room, alone, only letting Vaggie in. Then, suddenly, she'll burst out and demand that they get on with the search. It's like she's a completely different person, but deep down, everyone can tell that she's racked with guilt.
She just has to find you, she'll even get his dad to help if it comes to it. It doesn't matter, whatever it takes. She just wants to apologize for...whatever she did. Once you're back in the hotel, she'll make everything right, so right that you won't want to leave again.
Vaggie
Vaggie is well...Vaggie. She's conflicted. She doesn't know whether to feel afraid, upset, worried. It's too many emotions to shift through, too complicated. Because of these complicated feelings, she has a hard time being there for Charlie. She want's to help with the search, she really does, but at the same time she doesn't want to have to accept the fact that you truly are gone.
Lucifer isn't even able to find you, Alastor isn't even able to find you. You have to bee somewhere far away to stay out of there reach. The longer you're gone, the longer she's left wondering what made you leave. In your last few days at the hotel you were distant, like mentally. You were incapable of paying attention to anyone or anything, and thinking back on it, she should've known something was up.
She feels ashamed for being so guarded around you, for making it seem like she was weary of you. She was, but the point still stands. You're a nice kid, way too nice to be in hell. Maybe heaven realized that, and sent you back to where you belonged. No--
She won't have that, that isn't right, and it's not fair. It's not fair to Charlie, it's not fair to her, it's not fair to anyone else. You shouldn't just get to dig yourself into everyone in the hotel and then get ripped away when they finally accepted it. It's not fair.
If it was heaven that took you from them, she'll make them pay.
Angel
Angel wants closure.
He gets why you left, he really does. You're too good for this place, for all these people, and so you left, he gets it. What he wants is for you to tell him to his face that it wasn't his fault.
He looks back on his interactions with you, him closing himself off only to welcome you in at the very last moment, the moment where he craved friendship and stability the most, only to then push you away when you needed him. You were struggling, with--something.
Something he has no understanding of. He can't decipher anything behind those blank eyes, he can't figure out what your monotone words mean, and it worries him. He wants to be there for you, offer you comfort, anything.
But he knows he'll just ruin you more. He'll say something, do something, and you'll leave him, you'll hate him. He'll infect you, ruin you, until you're nothing more than a shell of what you used to be, and he hates the thought.
But it doesn't matter now, because even after keeping you at arms length, after depriving himself of you, you still leave, and all he's left with is the pain of not knowing. Not knowing if he did something, if he hurt you, if this is his fault.
But what hurts the most is the pain of not knowing if he could've done something, said something, did anything other than wallow in his own pity and desperation.
Maybe if he did you'd still be here. But he'd never know, would he.
Husk
Husk immediately assumes Alastor is to blame.
That Radio Demon is up to something, he's been gone for days since you left, doing whatever the fuck. He assumes, hopes, that Alastor is looking for you, because if anyones to find you its him. But of course, Alastor tells him nothing. So all he can do is hope.
Hope that you're somewhere safe, somewhere good. He hopes that there's someone nice taking care of you, or that you're at least taking care of yourself. He hopes that you're happy, and healthy, and everything else a kid should be. Because ultimately that's all Husk has, is hope.
He wonders what he could've done, if anything. He wonders what Alastor is going to do, if anything. He wonders what's going to eventually happen when they don't find you, and you're gone, and everyone just has to accept that you're not coming back. He wonders if that's even possible.
Because as a bartender he watches as Angel drink his days away, and as Charlie slaves away with searching for you, and as Vaggie spends all her time in her head.
And when Alastor is at the Hotel, he watches as he converses with Charlie, both of them talking in hushed whispers. He can hear the static, and the screams, and the pleas as Alastor demands to know how you haven't been found. And for a second, he sees worry in Alastor.
And in turn, Husk worries, because if you, and you disappearing, is so easily capable of making Alastor lose his composer, than something must be wrong. If Alastor isn't able to find you, and it's making him worry then it must be serious, it must be real.
But even so, Husk hopes. He hopes you're safe, and happy, and healthy. Because now there's the possibility that you're not coming back, and Husk has nothing left but hope.
Alastor
Alastor knew something was up with you.
From the moment you appeared in Hell, he knew you weren't right. You were too...alive for a demon. You were too naive for someone in Hell. You were too human.
For a while, there was nothing Alastor could do to prove his thoughts and honesty, he didn't want to. It was fun, watching as you stumble about this world completely unaware of what you've gotten yourself into. You're interesting, and you intrigue him. You should be proud, that's not something most can do.
But as your stay in hell lengthens, his feelings for you a mudded. His intrigue is turned into obsession, an obsession for you naivety, for you humanness. It makes him wonder how, or why you're down here. What you must've done to be placed here, even if you are somehow alive.
Alastor hasn't felt like this in a long time, and a part of him despises you for it. He hates the feelings that washes through his chest when he's around you, almost paternal like. He hates the way he faltered when he was told of your disappearance. And he hates the anger that course through him after weeks of not being able to find you.
Alastor looks everywhere, in every corner of Hell for any sign of you, and comes up with nothing, and it enrages him. It's an emotion he's more familiar with, rage, and for some reason hates it.
Because this type of rage is only direct at people who take you from him, this type of rage means you had the gaul to leave him. But this type of rage is the thing motivating him to keep searching and he looks forward to when you back with him.
Because you will be back with him, and the rage will be gone, and instead be replaced with that sweat, unfamiliar obsession that he's come to crave.
#yandere x reader#platonic yandere#soft yandere#yandere hazbin hotel#hazbin hotel#platonic yandere hazbin hotel#hazbin hotel x reader
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a kind of hunger | chapter 1
joel miller x fem!reader
series masterlist
joel miller walks into your life just as it starts to fall apart. surely some hot nights with the bar's newest regular can't hurt, right?
length: 9.2k
warnings: 18+, mdni, smut, fem!reader, unspecified age gap, fingering, oral (m and f receiving), doggy style, missionary, slightly painful sex, dirty talk, size kink if you squint, joel is a liiiiiiiitle mean if you squint, general feelings of loneliness and angst from r in her free time
a/n: huge thank you to @strangerfreaks without whom this would never have gotten off the ground. also to all the joel writers on this site, i love you, i am in awe of you. please allow me to give it a go myself <3
navigation | 𝗺𝗮𝘀𝘁𝗲𝗿𝗹𝗶𝘀𝘁 | 𝗴𝘂𝗶𝗱𝗲𝗹𝗶𝗻𝗲𝘀
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The first time you sleep with Joel Miller you know it won't be the last.
But that's not where this story starts.
It starts in a bar. Nothing special about it, really. Staffed half by college kids who come and go, half by drifters who, for some reason, stopped drifting once they found this dimly lit, sticky-floored hole in the wall. Not quite a local institution but not forgettable, never totally empty. It's got pool tables and a jukebox but also clean bathrooms aside from the graffiti and two new-ish TVs showing whatever the first guy who gets there wants to watch.
Point is, you work there. One of those drifters who stopped drifting. The guy who owns it, some crotchety old fuck called Bill, rents you the apartment above the bar for a decent price considering it's loud until 2am on the weekends and midnight all the other days. Loud enough that even on nights you don't work it feels like you're there anyway. But you get used to it. It's called Frank's, which you don't totally understand, but you're not about to ask questions of the guy who has finally allowed you to slow down and take a breath who is also your boss and landlord.
You've worked there long enough to have learned the names and orders of all the regulars who've been coming in since long before you walked through the door and to have seen some new regulars enter the rotation. In truth, you've worked there long enough to basically be running the place. It's still the bar in your head, not your bar because getting attached will do you no good. This is how it always goes: you care too much but it never seems like anyone cares back. You cut and run before you can be disappointed and you’ve already been here longer than you’d expected to be because it’s something close to comfortable.
Almost no one messes with you despite being younger than most of the clientele and on the off chance some frat boy from the city decides to take a cheap shot you've got a small army of imposing customers on your side. Between them and your coworkers, it's almost like you're not alone.
Almost.
The hours you spend away from the bar are spent alone. You don't have many numbers in your phone and the ones you do you don't call. You go on drives in the shitty truck you bought off some guy when you moved here. You browse used bookstores and suffer the heat of the day on long walks and wonder if this is all there is. You think of what it might be like to feel something other than rootless.
One thing that helps is…sex. Being close to someone for even a little while, letting yourself be seen in a way that doesn’t require you to totally show your hand. You try not to make a habit of actually fucking your clientele. It can get messy quickly, guys coming in and expecting more than a good pour. Being offended when you don't give them a free round, don't make eyes at them over the oiled wood. It's easier to be alone, that much you've learned. It's easier and it's simpler and it means you've only got yourself to blame for the hurt you sometimes feel laying in bed, staring at the ceiling as some rock song thrums up through the floor.
And if you do fuck someone from the bar, you keep it simple. You do, however, try really hard not to sleep with regulars. And no staying over. A classic, unspoken rule of sleeping with strangers that you rarely verbalize but make sure to enforce every time. It keeps things neat. The last thing you need is mess. Who knows how long you'll stay in this town, in this little apartment and this shitty bar. You've got a lot of years left, a lot of years you should probably spend in classrooms or an office or falling in love with some nice guy with a nice family who can give you a nice life.
But you're here.
And then, one day, so is Joel.
Being a good bartender is memorization, paying attention, and keeping a level head. You know how to make pretty much any drink even though your regulars are mostly the simple beer or Jack and Coke kind of people. You swear you can tell when a glass is going to fall a second before it shatters, spot a punch before it can be thrown. So you notice when a man you've never seen before walks through the door.
You notice how the energy of the room changes, how multiple pairs of eyes follow him as he settles at the end of the half-full bar. Dark hair shot through with grey, green shirt rolled up over chorded forearms that he rests on the wood. It feels like you should know him but you don't. You've never seen him before.
You finish pouring beers for some giggly girls before making your way over to him. His eyes track you.
You wonder what he'll order. A shot, maybe, based on the tense line of his shoulders. Or a dark beer. Maybe something strong. You hope he won't be one of those guys you have to peel off the bar in a few hours. "Can I get you something?"
"Whiskey, rocks," he says. You can hear the Texas drawl even from so few words. Deep, low, measured. "Cheapest you got."
For some reason, it feels like he's returning and you're the new one. "Wanna start a tab?"
"I'll do cash at the end," he says. Ah, one of those. Guy getting away from his wife, maybe. Tough day at work. Doesn't want to leave tracks. You can relate to that.
"Joel fuckin’ Miller," one of your regulars says as you turn to grab a glass. He claps the man -- Joel -- on the shoulder. "Heard you were back up this way," he says. "Good to see you, man."
Joel simply inclines his head once like he's not thrilled to be recognized. The dismissal is clear. And, weirdest of all, it works. You've seen insults hurled between friends for less.
You set his drink down, the amber liquid sloshing around the ice.
"Thanks," he mutters. The dismissal is...less clear, but you've got other customers to tend to. And Joel doesn't seem particularly chatty.
Your eyes return to him for the next hour or so but he never waves you over for another round. Heat trails up and down your spine and you have to tell yourself that he's not watching you. That would be too optimistic, right? At one point you take a bathroom break and when you're back he's gone, wrinkled bills stacked under the glass. Enough for his drink and a decent tip.
Joel comes in three more times over the next month before you sleep with him. Each time he orders the same drink, leaves the same tip. He sits alone at the bar, occasionally saying hello when someone approaches but no one ever sits next to him. He's gruff but only ever polite to you, doesn't get impatient when it takes you a minute to get to him.
And he's really something to look at. The tick in his jaw, the veins in his neck. His skin is tanned, dotted with small scars that must come from a lifetime of hard work. He wears a watch and jeans that hug his ass in an almost indecent way, a way that has you watching him when he's not on a stool. Sometimes you catch him smirking to himself when there's some shit going on at the bar, gossip or people being loud for no reason. You wonder what his laugh sounds like and scold yourself for it. No harm in looking but there's the possibility of harm in thinking too much. You know better.
The third time he comes in is a bad night. It's busy for some reason and everyone is a fucking asshole. You weren't even supposed to work tonight but one of the seasonal kids had banged on your door begging you to come help, promising you all the tips for tonight if you did. You knew it would make you look good to Bill and despite yourself, you didn’t want to leave them hanging, so here you are, sweaty and pissed and smelling like beer, doing your best to empty the dishwasher in between drink orders and praying the keg doesn't need changing.
You don't even notice when Joel comes in, only spotting him once he's managed to scare some college kid from a seat at the bar. For some reason, his presence makes you a little calmer in the chaos.
"Be with you in a sec, Joel," you say to him when you're near. You don't call him by his name since he never actually introduced himself to you but it slips out in the rush. His nostrils flare but you don't have time to linger on it even as you feel the hot weight of his gaze.
"No rush."
You manage to get him what you know by now to be his usual only to be called over by your least favorite customer of the night as soon as he's thanked you.
"Honey," the asshole says. This fucker's name is Seth and he's a pain in your ass. "Gimme another, will you? Make it a heavy pour." This would be his fifth and he's already slurring his words.
"Don't think so," you tell him firmly. "I'm cutting you off for tonight, Seth." He's liable to start some shit or at the very least throw up on the floor and you don't want to deal with either. You don't have time to deal with either.
His bloodshot eyes narrow and he slams a fist on the bar. You manage not to flinch, though pretty much everyone else does. "That's not good fucking service, sweetcheeks," he leers.
"Good thing I don't give a fuck," you snap. "Get the fuck out of here before you do something you regret, sweetcheeks.” The venom in your tone seems to surprise him before sheer rage takes over. You've thrown out plenty of assholes in your time here but it's not always a smooth experience.
Seth leans forward over the bar, reaches for you -- to do what, you have no idea -- and you prepare yourself to yell for backup and then kick him out for good and maybe get a punch in as he goes. His fingers manage to hook in your shirtsleeve before a hand closes around his wrist.
Before Seth can scream he's got his outstretched arm behind his back, face twisted in pain. Behind him is --
Joel?
The bar is almost silent. You can hear a few whispers over the blood pumping in your ears.
"I'd get out of here if I were you," Joel hisses. He glances at you, jaw tight and eyes narrowed. Are you okay? he seems to be asking. You nod.
Seth whimpers. "Let me go," he says weakly.
"Just gonna show you the door." Joel all but drags him through the parting crowd.
"Jesus," someone says behind you. One of the seasonal kids. "You okay?"
"I'm taking my break." You leave the kid behind the bar to fend for himself and barrel into the back and through the side door into the alley where you always take your 15. It's one of those weird cold fall nights, just the wrong side of chilly to be here without a jacket but you left it in the bar office.
The milk carton you sit on has been turned over so you kick it back with a thud and slump down onto it. The light above the door flickers. "This shit is getting old," you say to no one. You kick aside cigarette butts that aren't yours and wonder how long you can do this. What would be next, anyway? You've got a laundry list of failed dreams and no one wondering if you're going to make something of yourself. Long nights at a bar you care about more than you should and rowdy customers and handsome men who barely say a word to you can't last forever, can it? Would anyone here even notice if you left?
The door flies open, startling you out of your thoughts.
Joel steps into the alley. Somehow he manages to yet again look like he was meant to be here and you're the one who is out of place. You blink at him and he stares back like he wasn't sure he'd find you here.
"Got lost?" you ask. "Pretty sure you know where the front door is."
He lets the metal door swing shut and crosses his arms. "Was lookin' for you."
That catches you by surprise. "Why?"
Joel shrugs, a small lift of his shoulders. His expression doesn't budge. "Sorry for makin' trouble."
Oh, right. Seth. You wave him off. "Just another night," you say. "I'd have handled it." You stand from the crate and lean against the brick wall. It's true. Seth isn't the first asshole you've handled.
"I bet you would've," Joel mutters. He takes one step closer. You're reminded all at once how good-looking he is, how you've wondered what his hands would feel like on your skin. There's no way he's ever thought of you, right? You're just some girl who pours him drinks, too young and too forgettable. He was just having a man moment, wanting to save the day or some shit like that.
"I don't have a cigarette or anything if you want to smoke," you say. This close he doesn't smell like tobacco but you don't know what else to say. "Sorry."
"So you just sit in alleys on your break for fun?"
"I like this alley," you say, suddenly a bit defensive. "It's a nice alley." You take a step towards him. He uncrosses his arms and his hands flex at his sides. You shiver. "No one bothers me out here."
Joel tilts his head to the side. "That so?" His eyes are dark under the dim light. When did he get so close? When did your face get so hot?
"Except guys who drink whiskey on the rocks, I guess," you say. It comes out much softer than you'd like, your voice cracking. The air doesn't have the same bite as it did seconds ago. Joel's expression hovers between something you recognize and something you don't, something you desperately want to figure out. "Good thing I don't mind." The adrenaline from the small altercation hasn't left and the swirl of emotions about your whole shitty life has you on edge, has you wanting to play with fire.
You're so close now that you can feel his breath on your face, feel the heat of him in the still night. Joel's eyes rake over your face, looking for something, something you try very hard to show him so that he might fucking do it, meet the want that is suddenly uncontrollable halfway, or at least tell you if he's not interested so you can --
Your name is a groan in his throat and then he's kissing you. His palm cups the back of your head as he presses you into the wall, his other hand firm on your hip, fingertips pressing into your skin through your shirt hard enough to bruise. He tastes like the whiskey you served him. You fist one hand in his collar and wind the other into his hair.
Joel controls the kiss but you give as good as you get. He licks into your mouth and you suck on his lower lip. His beard rubs against your face in a delicious burn and when you tug on his hair he makes a noise you must hear again. The brick behind you scrapes a bit but you hardly notice when he presses against you, slides a thigh between your legs and you feel him hard through his jeans.
"S'not right, you lookin' so good yellin' at that asshole," he grumbles into your neck, teeth nipping at your pulse. You cant your hips and he hisses.
"Speak for yourself," you manage. "Always got your eyes on me, don't you?" It feels like a risk to call him on it. Control of the situation is slipping from your grasp, this man who you never thought would actually touch you now holding you in his arms, his lips on your skin. He pulls back from your neck and smirks, eyes dark.
"'Spose I do."
You can work with that. You surge forward to kiss him again and this time he lets you call the shots while still meeting your bruising caresses with his own.
"Joel." You tug on his hair.
He makes that noise again.
It might be five minutes, it might be an hour. You have no idea. All you know is you can still feel his cock through the denim and you're so turned on you might combust in this alley. Or at the very least let him fuck you in it.
"I don't close tonight," you pant. One of Joel's hands has worked its way into your back pocket and the other has rucked up your shirt to rest on your bare back.
"What?" he growls.
"My shift. I'm off at 11." You tap his watch. He glances at it and sees it read 10:30. "Half hour. I live upstairs."
For a second you think he'll say no. Walk away with a nod of his head and out of your life forever. Wouldn't be the first, wouldn't be the last. You're already breaking one of your rules by even considering sleeping with him but there's just something about him. The way he looks at you, the way his hands feel on your skin. You want to know what he'll feel like inside you. Maybe you’re still in this town because you were waiting for him to walk through the door.
"Alright," he says. He clears his throat and releases you. You fuss with your hair and straighten your shirt and he adjusts himself in his jeans. "Half hour." His dark eyes narrow as he glances down the alley back towards the street.
"Take a walk around the block or something," you tell him, swallowing the urge to laugh at him so handsome and disheveled from your hands. Never in a million years would you have predicted that tonight would go this way. "My door is on the other side of the building. I'll let you up."
The urge to flatten the damage your hands did to his hair is so overwhelming for a second that you step away from him towards the door. His eyes follow you, expression unreadable. How many nights would it take for you to know what he's thinking? Careful, you think, or you'll be tempted to find out.
Joel watches you until you give him a little wave and slip back into the bar. The metal door clangs shut behind you and you lean against it, knees still wobbly. Is this actually happening? Are you really this overwhelmed by making out with some guy in an alley? You check the clock on the wall and curse. Your break ended ten minutes ago though since no one came looking for you it's probably no big deal. Being mostly in charge has its perks.
The bar is a little less crowded than when you left so you grab a rag and start wiping down the bar. Joel's seat is empty, his glass gone.
"Oh, hey," the seasonal kid says. "That guy, uh, Joel? He said to make sure you get this." He pulls out Joel's usual tip from his apron and holds it out to you.
Considering you're planning to go upstairs and fuck him until you can't walk, you don't feel like taking his tip tonight. "It's yours," you say. "Thanks for handling everything while I was out back." The kid blinks at you but knows better than to refuse, pocketing the cash and going back to loading the dishwasher.
You finish your shift. Your blood feels electric, your skin hot. Can anyone in this bar tell what happened in the alley? You haven't felt this way about a hookup in ages. Like you were wanted, not just convenient. It's just one night, right? Maybe he'll never come to the bar again, which makes your chest tighten for a second. Maybe you're about to ruin something you don't totally understand. But you haven't gotten this far in life by worrying about shit like that, so you clock out and wave goodbye and make your way to the other side of the building.
Joel isn't there. You unlock the door to the stairwell so you can at least wait for him inside when you hear footsteps, the crunch of gravel under boots. You fist your key between your knuckles just in case but before you can turn around you hear your name in that Texas drawl.
"Just me," he says. You don't know if Joel Miller is capable of looking nervous but this is probably close. He shifts from one foot to the other, hands in his pockets. A thrill runs up your spine. Are you really doing this? Are you really about to bring this man up to your apartment and hope to god he does whatever you want to you?
"Come on up." Yes. Yes, you are. You give him a smile and he follows you up to the landing.
"S'loud," he mutters once you shut the door. The bar's music wasn't that loud when you were in it and up here it's a dull hum, people's voices and laughter slipping through the cracks like a TV left on a little too high in the other room. These days it's background noise to you but you figure Joel lives in a house somewhere with lots of land and open windows and silence. He seems like the type to like silence.
Jacket on the hook, shoes clumsily thrown on the mat, keys in the dish. Your normal routine except there’s a man in your living room, too. He looks around the space, hands still in his pockets. You try not to be self-conscious about your place. It's small, sure, the bedroom visible through the currently open French doors in the small living room. Your kitchen is tiny, bathroom tinier, but it's all yours. "You get used to it," you say. "I hardly mind it anymore."
"Didn't say I did," he says. You both stand there for a few moments before Joel takes two big steps and crowds you against the door, one hand on your hip and the other next to your head. "Means they won't hear us." You swallow a gasp as he drags his nose along the curve of your jaw, breath hot on your skin. You were going to ask him if you could shower first since you undoubtedly smell like sweat and beer but clearly, he doesn't mind. His tongue darts out and he sucks on your pulse point, your own hands clutching desperately at his shirt. If he moves you're sure you'll melt into a puddle on the floor. "Means you can be as loud as you want," he growls. "That sound good?"
Any breath remaining in your body rushes out and you jerk your hips to make contact with the hardness in his jeans. "Yeah," you gasp. You can feel something like a smile against your neck. "That sounds good."
It's a dynamic you don't mind stepping into -- whatever this is. Every second of your life you feel like you're waiting for the other shoe to drop, for everyone around you to get tired. Your eyes are always on the exit, always wondering where you'll go next, what you'll leave behind this time. Even when you're fucking strangers you're always wondering how you'll get them to leave. You’re better off alone. But right here, right now, with Joel's heavy scent of sawdust and whiskey and something earthy, something grounding, in your nostrils, his hands and his mouth on you, nothing else matters. Your brain shuts off and you're just here.
You grab Joel's jaw and guide his lips back to yours. He allows it and you moan deep in your throat as he tongues back into your mouth, your own trying to give as good as you're getting. He pops the button on your jeans and you help him with frantic hands, shoving them down your hips along with your underwear so he can ghost his fingers through your coarse curls. He pulls back from the kiss to watch as he drags two fingers through your folds. Your eyes lock and he smirks as your lids flutter.
"Soaked," is all he says. You tip your head forward and rest your forehead on his shoulder.
"Don't be smug."
He huffs. "I ain't trying to sound like an asshole, but --"
"Already failed." He nips at your earlobe.
"Gotta work you open a bit, sweetheart," he says. His fingers circle your clit once, ever so slowly. Your grip on his bicep tightens and you wonder if you'll leave bruises. You hope so. "Gonna be a tight fit."
"Heard -- fuck -- that before," you gasp. Joel really fucking knows what he's doing. "I -- bed?"
"Smart girl," he says. You're pretty sure you get wetter. He pulls his fingers free but keeps a hold on your hip like he knows your knees are jelly. "Sit on the edge."
You leave your jeans and underwear behind and make your way to the bed through the French doors, sitting heavily on the quilt, knees bent and leaning on your hands behind you. Before you can say another word, Joel lowers to his knees between yours. He pries them apart even further and runs his hands up and down your thighs.
For a few seconds, you can't find the words. This man, older than you and impossibly handsome, face lined with years he's lived and hands callused with work he's done, this man that you hardly know anything about but can't get out of your mind, is on his knees before you.
"You gonna be okay down there?" is what you come up with.
"You always talk this much?" he mutters, though his mouth tugs up at the corner. Joel's forearms wrap around your legs and he tugs. You fall flat on your back in surprise and your ass almost hangs off the bed. He draws one of your legs over his shoulder and kneads the flesh of your thigh, eyes dark and jaw twitching as he spreads you open and just looks. "Might have to help me up but I think I'll be just fine."
"Joel --"
The end of his name becomes a high-pitched moan when he leans in and buries his face in your cunt. He drags his tongue up and down through your folds, nose catching your clit in a way that makes you squirm. His beard scrapes against your skin deliciously, leaving a sting that you know you'll be able to see evidence of when he's done. He laps at you before finally taking your clit in his mouth and sucking like his life depends on it. It's only his hand on your outstretched thigh keeping you from suffocating him between your legs, though you're not sure he'd mind.
"Should be a crime," he says. You look down the length of your body at him. His chin is wet with you, eyes meeting yours when he feels your stare. "Cunt this pretty tastin' so good."
How do you reply to that?
He's back at it before you can even try. Joel gets messy with it, the sounds of his attention loud and filthy. He tells you how wet you are, how good you taste, and your eyes flutter shut again.
"How're we doing?"
"Don't stop," you manage. "Just, don't stop--"
He prods your entrance with one finger. "Reckon you can take it, hmm? You're so wet it'll be easy." There's a bite to his tone, a sense of amusement mixed with awe like he can hardly believe it either.
"Two," you gasp. "I can take two." You need two, in fact. His hands are one of the few parts of him you've been able to study and you know his fingers are long, much thicker than yours and you need them to fill you up, need them to stretch you out. You need something to clench around because right now you feel like you're on the edge of the pleasure building in your core and if you don't get a release soon you'll just…just…combust.
Joel hums but you feel a second finger nudge into you. He slides them in and curls them as he goes. Your back arches off the bed.
"Dunno," he coos. "Pretty tight, sweetheart." The slight meanness to his words is in complete contrast with the gentle, attentive way he handles you. Who knew he'd be such a fucking tease.
"Well get to work, then." He scissors the digits inside of you in reply and returns to sucking on your clit. You reach down and bury your hand in his silver-streaked hair, tugging a bit harder than you intend to. Joel just moans into your cunt, the vibration making it feel like your very pelvis is rattling as he continues to fuck you with his fingers.
Sweat beads on your brow as you try to hold on. He picks up the pace and presses into your walls with his fingertips like he's looking for something. His tongue wreaks havoc on the rest of you, sucking bruises into your inner thighs when he's not abusing your clit. If this is just the foreplay you don't know how you'll survive actually fucking him. And he hasn't even asked you to touch him, hasn't shown even a hint of expectation. He's doing this to get you ready but based on the blown state of his pupils he's enjoying it almost as much as you are.
"Getting close?" he asks, breath ragged. Your skin is starting to feel deliciously raw from his beard and the hook in your belly is pulling tighter and tighter.
"Yes -- fuck -- I'm close, Joel, keep --"
His hand moves faster than before and he latches back onto your clit. Your legs start to shake and you feel your orgasm coming, it's just right there, you just need him to --
His fingers find the spot he must have been looking for and your only warning is a sharp tug on his hair and then your back arches and you come all over his face. He fingers fucks you through it and you feel it as your walls clench around him, your mouth open in a high whine as your muscles finally relax and you flop back onto the bed. Joel keeps his face in your cunt, gently lapping at your release while avoiding your sensitive clit. You push his hair back from his face and try to get your breathing under control.
He manages to get up on his own with a grunt as you pant on the bed. "Okay?" he asks. "Lookin' a little tired." You show him your middle finger and he...laughs, lips shiny with your slick. So he can laugh.
"Are you going to keep your clothes on?" you ask him. His eyes travel slowly over your bare bottom half, the redness of your thighs from his beard and the way your shirt has rucked up to the wire of your bra.
"Nah." He sits heavily on the edge of the bed to take off his boots and socks. You want to ask him if you can undress him, slowly peel off his layers button by button and explore every inch of him but you won't be able to take it if he says no so you just watch. Already you know you'll be thinking about this night for a long fucking time. The way it seems like he cares about how you're feeling, how he wants to take his time with you, how he enjoys your pleasure. It's nice. It's...making you feel wanted.
His denim button-up is tossed on the floor and he stands, shirtless, to undo his belt. The forearms and small triangle at his throat that you've been treated with thus far when he sits at the bar in no way prepared you for the rest of him. Broad shoulders, thick, muscled arms from years of hard work. Graying chest hair that travels all the way down the slight softness of his belly and in a darker trail his jeans. Your mouth waters.
"You're starin'," he says softly before unzipping his fly and pushing his jeans and boxers down in one motion.
"Taste of your own medicine." The words come out with much less bite than you intended as his cock springs free.
Well, he wasn't lying. He is big. You knew he would be based on what you felt through his pants, but seeing it is something else.
You sit up and scoot to the end of the bed to be closer. Is he really going to fit? He's bigger than anyone you've fucked before, that's for sure. A ruddy color, a little darker than his tanned chest, the tip a little lighter and already leaking. A few veins run the length of him and the hair at the base of his shaft is clearly taken care of though a little wild and a shade of deep brown that hasn't grayed much yet. His balls hang heavy, one slightly bigger than the other. He twitches under your gaze. You look up at him and wait for him to call out your staring again but instead, he's just watching you, pupils blown.
"You are...so beautiful," you breathe. He makes a dismissive noise but a flush travels up his chest and to his face. It's true. There's something about him that makes you think you could look every second for the rest of your life and not get enough.
"Should be sayin' that to you." He strokes himself once and you lick your lips. "You got a condom? Should be one in my pocket if you don't." Does he always carry one? Or did he hope to get lucky with you, just like you've been thinking about him?
"Bedside table drawer." He goes for it and you remember too late that the drawer has...other things in it, too. His eyebrows raise and he eyes your small collection of toys but says nothing, though his cock twitches again. If you asked, would he use them on you? He seems like the type to be into that. But right now you need him inside you so badly you might combust.
"Can I?" He pauses before handing the foil square to you. You take him in hand and stroke him from root to tip. He makes a noise low in his throat and you lean in to trace the vein along the bottom of his shaft with your tongue. His hips twitch forward just a bit like he's trying to keep control and failing. You know the feeling. He's warm and heavy on your tongue and the slightest bit salty. You kind of lose the plot for a second, thoughts of him fucking you fading with the desire to make him feel good like this, to blow him until he's moaning your name like you were moaning his.
Joel slides his fingers into your hair and you manage to take him about halfway before he tugs gently. "I'm not complainin'," he says, voice tight. "'Specially when you look so damn pretty like this. But I've been hard as a fuckin' rock for an hour and I ain't as young as I used to be, so..." He trails off.
You place a dainty kiss on his tip and pat his hip. "Another time," you say, realizing too late what you've implied, but Joel just smirks. You tear open the foil and slide the condom on as gingerly as you can but he still hisses your name like he's scolding you, that hand in your hair pulling once again just a little. You feel the arousal pooling in your gut, sticky between your thighs.
He tugs on the collar of your shirt. "Off," he says. You're quick to obey, whipping it to a corner of your apartment along with your bra. Joel just looks for a second before reaching a calloused hand to palm one breast, thumb sliding over your nipple. "Look at you," he says, breathy, with a squeeze. "Christ."
"You gonna fuck me, Joel Miller?" You blink up at him. He swallows visibly, throat bobbing before that smirk is back.
"Only ‘cause you asked so nicely."
You scramble back up the bed on your hands and knees, leaning down on your elbows and presenting him with your bare cunt. "Cause I'm such a lady."
"That so?" he murmurs. He drags his fingers through your folds slowly, brows furrowed. You fist your hands in the sheets. "You want it like this?" he asks. He palms your hip, traces the curve of your ass and presses his fingertips into your skin. You wiggle at him a little. Most guys you hook up with want it like this. You don't mind being fucked from behind, don't mind being able to close your eyes with your face shoved in the sheets and just feel. God knows with a dick his size you'll be feeling it regardless of the position you're in. But part of you does want to look at Joel, to watch him, his expression, his handsome, rugged face. Feel his arms around you, feel the warmth of his breath on your lips as he fucks you. See what his eyes look like when he comes. But this is enough.
"Do I need to say please?"
The head of his cock presses against your entrance in reply. You crane your neck to see as much of him as you can. He's focused on your ass with a light frown, hands resting on your hips.
"Gonna go slow," he grumbles. His gaze meets yours. "For my benefit as much as yours."
Words don't come. You're breathless and dripping, desperate for him to just get on with it.
"Joel, are you gonna just stand there --"
He slowly, torturously slowly, starts to slide into you. The stretch is immediate, has you face down in the sheets, eyes fluttering. Each inch of painful stretch fades quickly to throbbing pleasure, a fullness that has you keening.
You press your hips back into him but his fingers grip tighter, holding you in place. "What did I say?" he grits out.
"Feels so good, so big," you babble. There's nothing left in your brain, your body, but this. But Joel. You have to have all of him. "I can take it, I can take your cock, I --"
"Got quite the mouth on you, huh?" he says. He keeps pressing into you, filling you up inch by inch. "Okay?" he pants. "Look at me, tell me it feels good --"
You crane your neck again, tears gathering at the corner of your eyes and look at him. His own are lidded, mouth open in an "o" like he can hardly believe it himself. A flush runs down his chest and if you didn't know better you'd say he's trembling.
"Yes, I -- god, Joel, keep going, please --"
"Doin' good, sweetheart," he coos. His hand strokes up and down your spine. "Almost there. Almost takin' all of me."
He bottoms out and you see stars. You feel lips on your back, the warm puffs of his breath on your skin as he waits for you. It's a fine line between pain and pleasure and you're walking the tightrope but the stretch is delicious. You can feel every inch of him. Your heartbeat is loud in your ears and you shift your hips a little, loving it when Joel moans.
"Alright," you manage. "Move, please." His fingertips are back on your hips and give you a squeeze before he starts to drag his cock out of you. The tip of him catches the spot inside of you that makes your back arch as he pulls out and then again when he thrusts in.
"All that work, my fingers and my tongue and you're still so fuckin' tight. Christ."
The only thing you manage to say is a litany of his name.
"Lemme hear it, baby," he grinds out. Baby. "Be so loud those fuckers downstairs hear you--"
You meet his thrusts as best you can and even though it feels so good, even though you're so full, it's not bringing you to the edge like you need. Your neck is starting to hurt from the way you're twisting to see him, your fingers gripping the sheets as hard as you can because you want to be touching him instead. But this is good, this works, maybe if you touch your clit, you'll --
You reach between your legs and Joel pulls out. You get off your elbows and turn around, almost gasping at the loss of him. "Is something wrong?"
He's frowning at you. "Should be askin' you that."
You don't know what to say. Your cunt throbs a little from being empty, the ache settling in now that he's not there to literally fuck it away. "What?"
"You stopped makin' those noises," he says softly. “The ones you were makin’ before.” You turn around and sit facing him, suddenly a little self-conscious. "Ain't gonna fuck you in a position you don't like."
"I --" You try to fight through the haze of your brain for words. "I liked it fine."
Joel waits. He just stands there at the edge of the bed and waits.
"Maybe..." you try again. "Would on my back be okay for you?"
His eyebrows raise like he can't believe you'd think otherwise. "That'll work for me," he says slowly. "Grab a pillow." You shift back on the bed as he kneels on it, positioning himself between your legs. You hand him one of your pillows and he taps your hip. "Up." You obey and he slides it under you so your lower half is lifted a bit before he presses one leg to the side, spreading you open. He slowly bends the other so that your thigh is pressed against your torso in a deep stretch without being painful. You feel bare, exposed in a way he somehow hasn't yet achieved.
Joel fixes his gaze on your face. "Let's try that." He strokes himself once and then leans over you, bracing himself on one hand near your head. He lines up to press his cock into you again. Faster than last time, you wince a little but you dig your fingertips into his back to tell him to keep going. He bottoms out and you immediately feel the difference, eyes fluttering shut. Before it was like he was plowing into you, like you were so full you could hardly handle it. But like this it's like he's melting into you, like there is no space between you anymore. You're full but it's not so harsh. You don’t know where you end and he begins.
"That better?" he croaks. You force yourself to look at him and find his face closer, closer than you thought he'd get, breath warm on your face. His forehead is beaded with sweat and his eyes search your face. This close you can see they’re grey, the lines at the corners deep with strain. Even like this, stuffed full of his cock, you could look at him all day.
"Move, Joel," you tell him. He takes that for a yes and starts at a punishing pace. You have no idea how he's kept it together this long, considering you've felt on the edge of another orgasm this entire time. You anchor your arms on his shoulders as his thrusts make you see stars.
"Ask for what you want, you hear me?" His balls smack loudly against you and he presses his lips to your ear. "You ask and I'll do my damn best."
You don't know what it is -- the overwhelming sensation of his cock dragging in and out at this angle, how close he is, his words -- but you feel tears at the corners of your eyes again. You nod frantically, hands grasping for purchase on his back.
"C'mon," Joel says. "Gotta use that mouth, sweetheart."
"Yes," you pant. "Yes, yes, Joel, yes --"
"Fuckin' perfect for me," he moans. His lips trail up your cheek, tongue catching your tears before he presses them to yours in a messy kiss that's more teeth and breath than anything else.
"Joel, Joel, Joel --"
"Gonna come for me? Gonna soak my cock like you did my face?"
Your orgasm comes like the snap of a rubber band. You hold him as tight as you can as it washes through you, the waves almost painful as he keeps fucking you fast and hard, your name a series of broken sounds from his mouth until his hips stutter and he groans deep in his chest. You try to keep your eyes on him as you come down from your high and are rewarded with the scrunch of his brow and the slight part of his lips as he comes. Beautiful, you think.
The room is all of sudden much quieter without the sounds of your fucking. It's just the dull sounds of Frank's through the floor and your combined panting as he pulls out of you and flops on the bed beside you. You wince this time, the soreness really settling in. Joel finds your hand and kisses the back of it in a move so unexpectedly tender you can't look at him, raw as you are already. The bed shifts and you figure he's throwing out the condom.
"You okay?" he says. You open your eyes and find him standing at the edge, looking at you. He's holding your robe from the bathroom. You stretch and let him look.
"Yeah," you reply. You give him a smile as you scoot to the edge and wrap yourself in it when he holds it out. "Thank you." Joel grunts.
You go to the bathroom yourself to pee and see the damage. Hair a mess, your mascara gathered around your eyes like you've been working hard. You've got hickies forming on your neck and chest, the skin rubbed a bit raw from his beard around your mouth. You love how you look right now.
You look like you got fucked well. And you did.
But now you want a shower and a snack and to go to bed.
You half expect Joel to be gone when you go back into the bedroom. You remember belatedly that you don't let hookups stay the night. Will he leave if you ask him to? If he's already left then you don't need to worry about it. A small part of you worries you won’t ask him to go.
Instead, he's sitting on the edge of your bed putting his boots on. His shirt is unbuttoned but other than that he's dressed. He looks up briefly. His own hair is going in a thousand different directions and if this wasn't a one-night stand you'd fix it for him, a hand pushing it back like you did when he was between your thighs. But things are different outside the heat of the moment.
"You want some water or anything?" you ask instead.
He shakes his head and finishes his boot, stands and buttons his shirt. "Nah," he says. "Should just head out."
You wonder belatedly if there's anyone at home missing him. Maybe he's got a wife. Maybe he's got a life that he's running away from and into your arms.
"Bar'll be closed by now, or as good as," you say. You spy his jacket by the door and bend to pick it up. "No one'll see you."
Joel's face does something funny that you don't quite know how to read. He takes his jacket from you and shrugs it on. "Alright," he says.
He looks awkward in a way you didn't know he could so you throw him a line. "Thanks," you say. For fucking me. For listening to me. For making me feel good. "It was fun. See you around?"
His expression softens. He steps close and gently holds your chin with his thumb and forefinger before kissing you once, firmly but chastely compared to what you were doing before.
"See you around," he says. And then he opens the door and disappears down the stairs.
You hear the outer door close and only then do you let out a breath. Your entire body feels like you just spent hours at the gym. But your mind? It's going a thousand miles an hour. You don't know what to think about first -- how Joel looked, how he spoke to you, how his hands felt. How he implored you to ask for what you wanted, how he made you feel good because it made him feel good. How you desperately, desperately want to see him again, to know him in every possible way. How you want him to walk back up the stairs and hold you until you fall asleep.
And that's not how you expected to feel. It's not how you should feel after a one-night stand with a guy you serve a few times a week at your place of employment. Like he saw right to the core of you, like he gave you something you didn't know you needed.
You need to get a hold of yourself. This is how it starts -- this is how you get hurt. You care. Well, you always care, but no one has to know that. You let someone care about you. Not that Joel does, but he could.
But isn't that the one thing you want most of all?
You sleep in the next day. There's not much that needs to be done at Frank's besides bookkeeping and inventory which doesn't take you long. When you finally make it downstairs, three Advil popped to ease the soreness of your entire body, you're surprised to find Bill himself sitting at the bar.
He looks just as you remember, hair a little longer and a little grayer. Shit kickers and jeans, a hunting jacket and trucker hat. You'll bet his actual truck is parked around back where no one from the road can see it.
"Uh, hi?" Bill hasn't come around for at least a year, which is making your stomach sink a little. The last time was when there was a fire because some dumbass tried to smoke inside and he wanted to make sure you weren't going to quit on him for having to throw water on the nasty curtains.
"Heard about Seth," he says. Always right to the point, this guy. He's drinking what looks to be Coke with a lemon. "Sit." You do as he says. So much for bookkeeping.
"Yep," you say. You have no idea where he heard it and know better than to ask. "No big deal."
"I want to retire."
What? "Do you...work here?" Bill appreciates honesty and he's the kind of asshole that respects you if you're an asshole back.
"No," he says. "But I own the fuckin' dump. And me and Frank want to retire."
"There's a Frank?"
"My partner, dumbass. Keep up."
You were already groggy and still muddled from last night but this is forcing you to bring everything into sharp focus. Bill wants to retire. Which means he wants to...
"So my options are to sell this dump or find someone to take it."
If he sells the bar you're shit out of luck. No way another owner would let you live upstairs the way you do for next to nothing and let you work here and run the show. This is...a lot to take in.
"Are you listening to me?" Bill says. You blink a few times.
"No," you admit. "Can you say that again?"
He sighs. "Do you want it?"
"The bar?" you ask incredulously.
"No, idiot, the dumpster out back. Yes, the bar." He raps his knuckles on the bar top. "You could keep everything the same. It's just paperwork, really. I'll just give it to you. God knows a young person like you could make it nicer, turn a better profit." He says it like it's an insult.
"Are you fucking serious?" This goes against most every rule you've had for yourself for the last who knows how long. Don't get attached, keep moving. No one really needs you so you can disappear whenever. You haven't gotten bored yet, haven't gotten restless, but you know it'll happen. There's no way you can do this forever. But owning a bar? That would make you stay. You'd have no out. You’d have to let yourself be seen, let yourself be needed. You’d have to commit. You’d have to not fuck it up.
"Why not?" he shrugs. "I know you said it was temporary back when you moved in, but you practically run it."
He's right. Everything is temporary for you. But would sticking around be so bad? Would trying to actually make a life for yourself, have a home base, a thing you care about be the end of the world? And then there's Joel...No. Not going there.
"I..."
"Either you take it or I shut it down." Bill gets off his stool and looks around. "No one cares enough about it to try to sell it."
"Then why me?"
"Do you care about it?" he asks. His piercing stare pins you to your stool, compels you to be honest with him where you're rarely honest with yourself.
"Yeah," you say. "I do."
"Then there's you're fuckin' answer. I know you do. You clean the shit out of this place and train the seasonal dipshits and learn the names of the fuckin’ drunks and live upstairs and make this a good place for good people to come. You think no one notices, but I notice. We all notice." It's possibly the most words Bill has ever said to you in a row.
"Can I...think about it?"
He shrugs. "Sure," he says. "Not too long, though. Gotta decide by the end of the year. Maybe earlier."
That gives you three months, give or take. To figure out what the fuck you're going to do.
With one conversation Bill has shattered your entire life here. Now there’s actually a timer on it, this little piece you’ve carved out and started to enjoy. Could you make it a real thing? Could you finally admit to yourself that this is what you want – to be wanted? To be needed? To have something that’s yours?
The bar door shuts and you realize Bill has left you alone with your thoughts. You shift in your stool and a wave of soreness rolls through you from your core.
You thunk your forehead on the bar. “Fuck me,” you say to the empty room.
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