roxineedstosleep
Roxifilo
Cinema student -fanfic writer - OPEN REQUEST - Like to create content
Ao3 Account: https://archiveofourown.org/users/Roxifilo_24/pseuds/Roxifilo_24
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now @owenwlwilson
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All I’m thinking about is the clone!reader character thing wacking one of the bat boys with their cane any time the get the chance they just walk up to them and SMACK! A bat gets bonked
Also who would be their Wilson in the sense that they are a dr house variant
Clon! Reader every time he smack some Robin with his cane: Oopsi whoopsi. (?)
Buuut. About Reader’s Wilson!
Javkovy sería su Wilson. Su mejor amiga, también tiene una especie de bromance allí.
Luz sería su Cuddy. Él no es tan sarcástico con ella. Pero sí. Las únicas mujeres por las que se mostraría pleased en dejarse controlar.
Y la batfam… esos serían los pacientes estúpidos con los que debe tener una actitud cordial.
Alfred? Mmm, Reader do not hate him, but also do not love him like the other kids. Since Alfred was always busy or trying to transform Reader to be Dick all the time. Alfred would be like the person who prepares coffe in the cafeteria. Usefull but not close at all.
#yandere batman#yandere dc#batman#yandere batfam x reader#yandere dick grayson#yandere bruce wayne#yandere tim drake#yandere jason todd#yandere damian wayne#yandere alfred pennyworth#yandere platonic batman#platonic yandere#batfamily#dick grayson#tim drake#damian wayne#batfam#jason todd#male reader#male oc
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Bruce, literally trailing behind his father as he watches Clark being dragged out of the house: But daddy! I love him!
Thomas: Get the hell out of my house you ruffian Kent! I won't let my baby hang out with your kind.
Clark: But sir! I'm a fan of the Gotham baseball team!
Lol, I just read the 'cigarette mom! Thomas' and now I suggest to you....
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....
Rebellious daughter! Bruce as a consequence of Thomas and Martha's odd ways of parenting...Bruce may have un(he very much did)intentionally made a harem for himself(every single person you see him with)
PLS!! It’s such a shame Thomas died before he could meet Clark :(( Because that boy would’ve melted from one look lmao. Even better if Pa Kent used to be Thomas’ number one enemy at Metropolis vs Gotham games :)))
let’s imagine for a second that Thomas and Martha didn’t die and Bruce still became Batman. He definitely brings all the boys to their yard and it’s TIRING.
“…Wait a goddam second…That accent ain’t no Metropolis. Boy, where you from?”
“Oh, I’m from Kansas, sir :D”
“…Who’s your daddy?”
“Joseph Philip Kent The Second, sir ^^ I believe he mentioned you a couple of times! Boy, you sound like a fun loving guy—“
“GET THE HELL OUT OF MY HOUSE!”
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I can imagine the reader in https://www.tumblr.com/roxineedstosleep/741825842030706688/can-you-do-platonic-batfam-with-a-male-reader-who ends up having to use a walking stick after healing because parts of a building falling on you definitely ends up causing permanent damage to ya
I couldn't let this pass without first wondering if my interest in Dr. House had been evidenced.
But hey. To answer your question and idea.
Yes, the reader would definitely use a very Greg House-esque cane. We'd just omit a bit of his lack of medical license and a Wilson to accompany him.
Jackovy is more of a dealer best friend/fake husband than a Wilson.
The Reader would have to use a cane and that, like anyone else would tire him out more than if there had even been the option of cutting off his leg.
The small detail here is that the debris falling on his body wasn't exactly on his leg. It was at the intersection of the hip and the beginning of the femur bone. They were able to fix it, but walking would not be an option without a cane.
That, somehow or other, would delay his need to leave the Wayne side for good much longer. And not because his things are there. But because unfortunately, and I don't doubt they won't try, they would try to play on his poverty status to take him with them.
Of course, without an ID that could link you to them, and the lack of logic of their real connection between you and Dick; without revealing the whole vigilante thing to the world… it's a bit tricky.
#batman#batfamily#dick grayson#jason todd#batfam#yandere batman#yandere dc#damian wayne#yandere bruce wayne#tim drake#yandere male#platonic yandere#male reader#yandere dick grayson#yandere batfam x reader
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Can you do platonic batfam with a male reader who is like Hunter from the owl house
Imagine having a manipulator uncle and is a clone of someone
Clones have no personality.
Not at least in the interim of their realization.
At the beginning they know what they want and that, then, when they interact with a more real world they realize that they are nothing and at the same time they are someone.
The emptiness that comes with realization, anger, loss, parendiza and acceptance are things that take time. They take time, tears, reproaches, rejections, acceptances, cries, screams, health and so many other things.
Conner surely understands what the reader is going through, he knows what it means to be someone's clone and not knowing what else to do for oneself.
Conner didn't know he could be himself until he stopped trying with Clark.
The reader… well.
Being Dick Grayson's clone wasn't something you'd like to have known.
Worse yet… meeting Dick and then the whole family was even worse.
You no longer knew if your affections, hobbies, likes and dislikes were a macabre work of genetics or because that's what you'd really be if you weren't a clone.
You were- are? soooo much like Richard.
But at the same time you were so different. His dark light skin was like a beautiful bronze compared to your uneven brown skin. It looked like your hair waves were hideous compared to his perfectly wavy hair. His eyes were the perfect shade of blue, well-place mole on the chick, his voice was more enchanting than yours.
Every time you saw him more and more, you felt as you looked in the mirror something about your appearance warp into an eternally striking malformation.
Your nails or your fingers didn't seem to be straight, your teeth were getting bigger and twisted(?), your hair was not manageable, your skin started to get more pimples or pores… nothing seemed to have an end.
You were too young to even be considered Dick's twin, at best, like Damian, you could be considered his younger brother… his son? To old for that?
Well, like Conner, someone had to have given the egg for that cloning thing to work.
That wasn't the point.
The point was that you were everything Richard wasn't. You never would be and never would become.
You didn't have the strength or the agility or the courage or the chutzpah.
When Bruce found you, it was as if he had stopped time and locked you in the Batmobile until Zantana and others came to see what they should do with you. You were just looking for the quickest way to buy candy. A simple detour around a corner and all of a sudden you were being pecked and bewitched by a bunch of people in tights who wouldn't stop asking you questions or wanting to get inside your head.
Your only mistake was scape from the orphanage for candy.
When the spells failed, when the manipulations came to nothing and when everything looked like it was going to end with you ten feet underground behind a ditch… they resigned themselves to completing the last box in the "kidnap a civilian" kit: they had to see if you were a fucking clone.
Bruce didn't even think of Dick as a possible cloning victim in the first place.
You didn't look like him… not in the right way. At least from Bruce's perspective; being the genius detective that he was.
Bruce had just squeezed the wheel of possibilities with the DNA of everyone registered in the Watchover system… the genetic co-incidence was just that.
A fucking co-incidence.
And Dick, he had the terrible luck to show up as a match. But even with that proff he did not believe it.
You, you couldn't be a clone, you had to be something else. Didn't you?
Your son? a mistake from the past?
No.
You were just the result of a crazy ex-girlfriend, an idiot Dick and a test tube.
They took you with them. You couldn't walk around without anyone watching you. Besides, a mansion was better than a low-security orphanage. Wasn't it?
But it didn't help any.
To them, to Dick himself, you were just a token that everyone was replaceable.
Bruce wanted to test if you were trainable to be Robin, but you could barely run without dying in the attempt. It didn't matter how many days you stayed in training or fighting.
Nothing worked.
Your belly was visible, your fatigue was or seemed chronic (some cloning error?), your appearance definitely resembled Dick but not in the right way. Or at least that's how you began to perceive it over time. As they, the Waynes, used to constantly emphasise to you.
Sometimes you could stand for hours in front of the mirror wondering if you were really a clone or if the machine had broken down.
And just as your relationship with your image began to deteriorate… the relationship with the members of the house didn't even seem to get off to a good start.
Damian didn't know how to treat you, Jason definitely looked at you with pity, Tim watched you like a lab rat, Alfred and Bruce tried to make up for all their faults with you.
Dick… Dick, like Clark, didn't want anything to do with you or relate to you.
At the beginning he tried. I mean, one of his best friends is a fucking clone, who was fiercely rejected by the person who should be his family. Wouldn't it be hypocritical of him to reject you?
But it was no use. The few times you did hang out together it was clearly awkward for both of you. And even if anyone asked how you were related, Dick was quick to reject any connection.
"He's a friend's cousin, I babysit."
"Oh, a co-worker's son."
"He's one of the Wayne Foundation kids."
Over time Dick really emphasised that he wanted nothing to do with you, or to know about you or even to consider accepting your existence. He pulled away, with different excuses or reasons to the point where there was no reason why they should relate to each other.
So, seeing that nothing could ever be the same again… you decided to take the next step.
Clearly they didn't want to see you. They didn't want to relate to you.
Dick was, much to your consternation considering that he even never get you a proper ID, your legal guardian, but even he didn't make a big deal out of it.
Damian wouldn't give you the time of day, Alfred and Bruce were always busy, Jason for clear reasons didn't want to be there, and Tim had a purely clinical interest in your existence.
Why be with them? Well, you needed a roof over your head, yes, but other than that there was no reason why you should waste your time and effort wanting to be there.
You were taken off the streets almost as an adult, you could see your way to entertain yourself until you could get out of there. You didn't have the same pressure as they did with public image, you didn't have to go to galas or society balls.
So, you looked for other ways to entertain yourself.
First it was sports, but you sucked. Really sucked.
The arts didn't seem to be your thing, even if you tried.
Dancing was also out of the question and singing, even though you weren't terrible, wouldn't bring you any kind of personal satisfaction.
That's when the clandestine outings came in.
You drank, you tried drugs, you did whatever it took to get out of the Wayne family's sight for more than a day.
There were bad experiences, definitely, but it seemed like life wanted to somehow make it up to you for everything it put you through.
Before long, you found relatively decent people.
People who, in the worst situations, you wouldn't hesitate to ask for help.
There were even times when you would spend up to a month or more away from the family home and never get a call or message about your whereabouts.
Before you knew it, the years passed and you had turned 18… or at least you could say so considering you were a fucking clone.
Months away from the Wayne's, calculating that time away from home, I'd say it was a total of 2 cumulative years that you were away.
And you were happy in those months far from the Wayne mansion. You had two good friends, who were in and out of drugs just like you. They would meet in a small, ramshackle studio and eat and get a job to survive together. When the going got tough, you'd rush back so your buddies could make ends meet.
Sometimes you would even send them some food and old clothes that everyone in the house was reluctant to throw away.
Many of your clothes were, ironically, things that others had left behind. Not because you didn't have clothes of your own, but it was easier to finish wearing worn out clothes than to wear something new that you could wear later.
But that wasn't the point.
You didn't know anything about the Waynes at that time, and they didn't know anything about you.
And that seemed to work just as well for them.
Worked perfectly for you as well.
You didn't have to deal with them, they didn't have to deal with you. Wasn't that the best thing?
If you came back alive, with tattered clothes and calloused hands, they wouldn't say go. It didn't matter if you'd spent most of the winter sleeping without heat or if you moved the bathtub into the living room to avoid flooding the floor during the rainy season.
You were invisible to them. And you were happy about it.
But, like everything else in life, nothing seemed to be enough, everything seemed like a sick joke and no matter what you did, you always ended up in the same mental hole that kept you from moving on.
You don't even know how the fuck you ended up like that.
It was just a party, a private fucking party with your two best friends. Jackovy had brought a new sour candy (real sugar tasty candy) to try, Luz brought her own special drinks. You had gone out of your way to make spicy mac and cheese that had just the right amount of creamy yet tangy cheese. What was the worst that could happen?
A fucking Joker bomb, half a block from Jackovy's ramshackle building, that's what. Just as the three of you were halfway through dinner, ordering takeout for something sweet for dessert…. a stinking bomb shattered the front windows to the street and Jackovy jumped on you to get you out of the place.
Without thinking too much you grabbed Luz by the arm, and both of you held on to Jackovy's large figure to escape from the building that was collapsing second by second. As soon as Jackovy put one foot out into the street, the whole building collapsed and you pushed him and Luz as far away from the collapse as you could, they pulled you in time, but your leg got caught in some of the debris.
You didn't want to see it, you didn't need to see it, but that leg was definitely broken. You didn't know the severity, but from what Luz was shouting in her native language and the insults your other friend was hurling you knew that a bandage wasn't enough.
Clearly, as if it were a bad joke, because the Joker really was a lousy comedian, it wasn't long before Gordon and a member of your family arrived at the scene of the crime.
It seemed so strange to you, so weird.
They really were good at acting their double persona. I mean, you never saw Dick be gentle with you before. Not when you broke your arm after trying to climb the chandelier like he once did. Not when Bruce yelled at you until he was hoarse because he couldn't do gymnastics.
You never saw Bruce act carefully when pulling out the debris. You didn't feel Dick's desperate way of calling a paramedic like fake.
But, it didn't matter.
Really, if you didn't get over that everyone in the family had taken acting classes you could believe a little bit about their acting.
Really, omitting all the obnoxious disinterest you had in them, you could say they were worthy of an Oscar for best acting or at least they were too professional to care whether you were the forgotten clone in the house or not.
As soon as one of the two wanted to get into the ambulance with you, you shouted Luz and Jackovy's name for them to follow you. The paramedics didn't know what to do, but there wasn't much to say about it either.
"Only family members or couples can join-"
"Jackovy is his husband" Luz had shouted, noticing how you were trying to run away from the nurses' restraints " Besides he always use his husband's"
"A child can't be an adult's boyfriend-" Dick had tried to say, frightened looking at Jackovy, who definitely looked to be at least about 27 years old. His prominent beard and his height and musculature really made him look old, how funny that he was only a couple of years older than you or Luz.
His unfriendly face didn't help the current situation either, but that didn't matter. The point was that Jackovy had health insurance in his name, so why did the technicalities of the safe age of consent matter now?
"I'm 23, his MY husband, he's coming with me" You interrupted.
The opinion of two men in dark spandex didn't matter anyway. You're married? Perfect, the husband has more right to be with you in the ambulance.
Your friend stuck around while Luz stayed behind to see if anything could be salvaged from the wrecked apartment.
Neither you nor Jackovy or Luz felt sorry for the place, it didn't belong to either of you, it was just an old building used as a game room. But, some things were of sentimental value.
If they could be salvaged it was worth a try. Also, probably many of the drugs were there. Was a better option to clean it before the police started to seek there.
Getting to the hospital and getting your leg fixed was easy. Making sure the fake marriage paperwork and the fake ID Jackovy had gotten for you passed as real was the tricky part.
You and Luz had done a perfect job in creating all the false documentation in order to generate a fake ID.
Better job of adding a little more age to you.
They knew your ID was functional, as you had even been able to get your friend out of the police lockup on a couple of occasions.
But the fake marriage paperwork they weren't sure about. those were, in a better word, almost new. Not even more than a week.
They would not have been created had it not been for your friend's last minute idea to be covered in this way. Jackovy did it expontanea.
It was fraud that paper, not that your ID was any less fraud than that certificate, but at least you only had one ID.
Jackovy had several marriage certificates with different people's names on them. Some for a greencard, others like you, who needed to be able to use health insurance.
But the paper passed as valid, Jackovy's insurance cover most of the expenses and now you could get some rest before you could leave for Luz's now truly owned apartment.
The bad joints, at the end of the day, had ensured that you didn't lose the money you had saved… but for some reason had lured a falsely concerned family into the hallway outside the room you temporarily had in the hospital.
What the fuck were they doing there?
#batman#batfamily#dick grayson#jason todd#batfam#tim drake#batboys#batfamily fic#damian wayne#male oc#female oc#batfam angst#male reader#tw yandere#platonic yandere#yandere batman#yandere x reader#reader#yandere dick grayson#yandere dc
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Could you do a snippet for yandere platonic Batfam where reader accidentally gets hurt and is able to hide it for a few days until someone (May be Dick?) finds it and asks / gets upset about it? Love your writing!!! ♥️♥️♥️♥️
Hi there!!!
First of all: Thank you sweetie!
It's been a while since I've written, mostly because of the university, I'm about to graduate and I'm crazy because I'm approaching my final exams (I even have to defend my research work to be able to get my bachelor's degree)!
But, I got to thinking a bit about what you have written above… and even more so because I myself am a little bit crashed after my last film shoot for my final year of my degree. And can I just say that being in a bad way and having to hide it is terrible.
So… here goes!
(I'm sorry if I sound a bit comical in this writing, but I think the best way to get over something is to laugh at yourself a bit so you don't think about the pain too much; I hope you enjoy it anyway.)
Disclaimer: I don't know if you've noticed, but English is not my native/mother tongue. Occasionally, when I think too much, I write them in my language and then translate it in a trusted translator. So, if there's a grammatical problem or a strange term, it's the translator's fault.
Let's face it… having a large family is terribly exhausting.
It's never quiet enough, everyone is in everyone else's business, you can't leave your favorite mermelade in the fridge for less than a day. Someone is always occupying the bathroom or using your favorite shampoo or watching something on TV at too much volume and someone is probably occupying your bed at nap time.
Did I mention about meddling too much in other people's business? Yes? Well… triple it.
Having multiple siblings was new.
Having multiple siblings, a father and a butler/grandfather isn't exactly bread and butter either.
It wouldn't be so bad to belong to a large and numerous one if it was your blood family and you had lived with them all your life. I mean, sometimes blood is too thick and you have no choice but to learn to love them or just be nice to each other.
Like I said, it wouldn't be so bad if they were really your family.
But the Waynes were not your family. Not distant relatives or anything like that.
You were just living your life, as quietly as possible… and poof!
New room, new butler/grandfather, pets beyond belief, 4 new male siblings and a father with serious emotional constipation issues. And, to add more salt to your wound…. all have serious abandonment issues and death-related trauma.
After several escape attempts, sleep strikes, hunger strikes and any other kind of protest that an anarchist could be proud of… you realized that it was simply impossible to get out of this without risking the path of death.
Which, to top it all off, was also unreliable because apparently your older brother Jason had revived as well as another of your siblings. So no, dying was also not a viable option to which one could resort in the worst case scenario.
What to do?
Well, not much. Trying not to die of suffocation of affection or finding a way to have privacy while going to the bathroom just seemed to be the best survival tools you could resort to.
What does that entail?
It implies that Tim was going to give you hours and hours of lectures on his latest discovery of a case, even if you don't understand half the things he's told you or mentioned at all.
Richard and Damian trying to teach you new tricks almost every second, taking you to the Zoo or not leaving you alone to go to the bathroom.
That Jason, oh holy cow he is the only one more relaxed, takes you with him on his motorcycle to eat ice cream and to the public library. Without being able to scape, because it seems that you have a kind of GPS inserted in the bone marrow.
(Sometimes you don't know if it's true or not, but sometimes you also felt pain between your bones, almost during the cold seasons, and you didn't want to burst your poor little head thinking of different viable possibilities knowing them. No scars, no remembering anythins about any surgery).
Have a grandfather who will not hesitate to make you cookies, your favorite foods whenever you want … without leaving you aside at any time.
Plus a terribly quiet father, who if he can will carry you for as long as you spend time together, won't let you near the secret basement and enjoys being in the same room with you.
Do you see any privacy in this?
No, because even at the bathroom door would be the pets trying to get in and see you for themselves while you want to do your business.
The worst of that? Titus always judge you when you close the curtains.
As I mentioned and it was clear: Having a large family implies little privacy… Having a large, obsessive family means NO privacy.
So, knowing that you have over 50 nanochips tracking in all your clothes, two security monitors embedded - God knows how - in your body (monitors that only tell you if you are in designated safe place), 20 high definition surveillance cameras in every room and a Great Dane chasing you like a chick …. How the heck do you fall down the stairs and hit your pelvic bone without anyone noticing?
No kidding, how?
And if you had to blame someone for your fall… you'd totally blame Damian for it.
It's not that the kid pushed you down the stairs, but over time he had tamed himself into various things and relaxed into looking his age. You know!!! He started acting like a normal teenager!
What do Damian's kids do at his age? Well, they leave things lying around and have messing around them when they can, of course they do!
You just wanted some yogurt with orange marmalade. Maybe some oatmeal cookies. Alfred had left it for you in the fridge when he noticed you'd been watching video tutorials on homemade marmalade for hours. Who were you to deny such a gesture of generosity?
I mean, Alfred was the one who allowed you to hide in the attic for hours on end so you could have some time to yourself.
And how did it end? You, slipping down the main stairs of the old Wayne mansion, down a nicely polished wooden staircase, rolling all the way down (which is no small flight of stairs, it should be noted) to the bottom of the first floor.
Now, lying on the ground is not so bad in itself. What is bad is not being able to feel your legs and still not being able to understand how you manage to tidy up your neural wiring so that your legs can still move on their own and go to the kitchen to rescue all the delicacies Alfred left you in time.
And it's a good thing you managed to do it… because within seconds Bart had rushed in to ransack the fridge and the fruit basket.
But that's not the point.
The important thing is that this time you managed, I insist a little on the feat of action, to climb up to your room and not notice how you couldn't really feel your legs.
You ate, you lay down… and to your bad or good luck, you couldn't get up …. and without anyone noticing there was an emergency and everyone went out to sort it out.
Weak limbs, limited movement and you don't want to mention the embarrassing actions you did in order to go to the toilet.
It's not like you hid it either, I mean, there was no one who could even notice because they weren't entirely available to watch you. Nor is it that you would have run away, otherwise they would have been at your side in less than a second.
The detail, as they insist, is that you had probably bruised your back badly and your body was now taxing you extra for your food craving.
I insist, you did not hide anything.
But still, when you're found completely itchy on the floor, ridiculously trying to run away in the direction of the bathroom… that's when everyone really goes crazy.
First, having to carry you and not dying of embarrassment when you notice that Bruce definitely doesn't give a damn about having to carry you to the bathroom and do almost everything for you.
Or having Dick and Jason carry you and fit you into some kind of weird medical scanner they have in the cave.
Or that Tim keeps track of your periods, types of meds you take and, for fuck's sake, knows how the fuck to inject something into your spine.
Or that Damian had the gall to look a little embarrassed when he heard that a pair of boxers lying outside the laundry basket was to blame for all this.
NO matter.
At the end of the day they heal you, pamper you, leave you alone when you need to take a nap and figure out a way to fix it without looking like complete maniacs who built some kind of internal plumbing that sucks up the dirty laundry and throws it straight into the washing machine.
Like the time they didn't look like maniacs by sanding all the edges of the tables and nightstands.
Or the time they bought a whole brand of sanitary towels when they realised that not all women use tampons.
Don't worry, they're looking out for you… even if they look like deranged Arkhan freaks in the process.
#batman#batfamily#dick grayson#jason todd#batfam#tim drake#batboys#batfamily fic#yandere male#yandere batman#yandere batfam#yandere#tw yandere#red hood#yandere batfamily#yandere batboys#yandere batfam x reader#yandere dick grayson#yandere damian wayne#yandere jason todd#yandere tim drake#yandere bruce wayne
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What's New Scooby-Doo?
So, yeah, long time no see you guys or read you, but after watching several videos of Simple Plan's last concert in my FY of Tiktok I couldn't help but get some energy out and post this Batfam idea out of my head.
…………….
Suppose Simple Plan comes to Gotham, for a concert, all with proper security and with special insurance that several artists get to be able to quietly do their concerts without risk or ups and downs.
All the brothers decide to go to the concert because they really don't usually go to these activities without some ulterior motive… and because it's Simple Plan. It really is a good band, why not?
But, Damian, being the youngest (I don't know, let's assume he's really no older than 7), refuses to go in normal clothes.
Thalia had gotten him a pair of Scooby Doo pajamas the last time she visited him, and he's been wearing them almost every day; because he's a dog and he loves dogs; and, to complete the game, Bruce managed to get all the Scooby Doo episodes for Damian to watch.
… unfortunately, the night of the concert is one of those nights that Damian ussually do his Scooby Doo's marathon.
And he already had a tantrum, because Damian doesn't usually have tantrums, when he noticed that Tim and Cass wanted to put a miniature band polo shirt on him.
Since it's almost time to go, and they don't want to be late, Dick and Jason simply put him in the car, put some sneakers on him and drive at full speed to the concert.
And that's when the magic happens.
During the concert, they start playing the intro of the series.
And, since he was quite down all night, Damian seems to cheer up and starts jumping all over the place, trying to watch the Scooby Doo videos on the screens.
Jason carries him on his shoulders, trying to prevent him from hurting himself jumping in such a crowded place, thanks to that a member of the Marketing staff manages to spot him (let's be honest, Jason did a great job, he has a respectable height, surpassing Bruce).
And when Dick and Tim least realize it, Damian is jumping on stage, singing and dancing the best he can while the band plays, Jason watching him from the sidelines. Cass, Duke and Steph recording the moment so they can share it with Bruce.
At the end of the night, Damian is completely knocked out in the back of the car, full of candy that some assistants gave him on the sly. With his costume full of confetti and, to everyone's great tranquility and misfortune, autographed by all the members of the band.
No one now knows how to tell Thalia that she should get a new pair of pajamas. At least if they want to keep the autographs on this one from being erased by wear and tear.
#batfamily#batfam#batboys shennigans#batboys#jason todd#tim drake#dick grayson#cassandra cain#duke thomas#stephanie brown#little bro damian#baby damian wayne#simple plan#scooby doo#batfam shenanigans#batfamily fic#batman
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For @unohanabbygirl, thanks for the inspiration!!!
Marmalade had not been at the King's Court for long.
Well, actually, Marmalade didn't have much time on many things. Just a few days ago she didn't even have a name or a place to drop dead, but now she had a sweet name (Very sweet! As sweet as the candy one of the guards gave her), a decent change of clothes and slippers on her feet. Yep. Now Marmalade can said proudly that she have two pair of slippers, 2 uniform dress, one pijama dress and large ragbow for her hair.
Isn't that great?
Marmalade knows she's not the smartest, she really struggles to read the room and clearly only has a few written words memorized by fire so she won't get lost in the place or know where to send correspondence. But other people and herself can't deny that she tries her best and, thank the gods, that's considered a good playing card inside the castle.
Marmalade has slowly moved from command to command until she became one of the maids to take care of Prince Lucerys.
And for that very reason, Marmalade (despite not being the smartest or the fastest) knows that it was a good idea to put laxative in her master's brother's tea. She doesn't feel guilty, not really, but if Marmalade herself understands or notices that Prince Jaecerys is mean to her master... no one can tell her anything.
After all, the laxative herbs seems too similar to the actual tea herbs. Ms. Currybures assured her and the head butler that her mistake was quite often after all. (Even though she saw Ms. Currysbures changing the herbs in porpuse. Or she was also confused? Maybe Ms. was also confused!)
Marmalade does not know when or how. But from being one of his master's favourite people (his master's older brother), the crown prince ended up being a great nuisance and a great pain in the arse. He was trying to sneak in through entrances, crying at the door for his master. But Marmalade refused to let him in, no matter if it meant other maids calling her a busybody or a fool. But clearly her master couldn't say no to his on his own; she had to.
Her prince knew that seeing his brother would end up more broken. How sad, the brother who preached so much about loving and caring for him was the first to hurt him. And yet, with the husband he loved so much.
That’s why she does not permit that man close to her master.
Because of that man her master doesn't want to eat, because of that man her master doesn't read to Marmalade and the other maids anymore; because of that man and her master's husband, Marmalade must check full time and can't weigh because she fears that her master one day will jump off her balcony. Not again... at least.
Because it is not the first time it happens. The attempt, you know?
She still remembers the scream she gave when she noticed her good prince standing on the balcony ledge. Had it not been for Ser Halland's help, Marmalade would definitely have fallen beside her master in a futile attempt to push him away.
After that she and Ser Halland, the same one who gave her sweets as soon as she arrived at the palace, would take turns together with other maids and guards to prevent the same incident from happening.
She even saw how Ser Halland managed to restrain her master's husband! Prince Aemond, when he heard about his master's attempt, demanded to see him and speak to him. The same accours with his master’s brother.
Marmalade profoundly refused to even let him pass near the door of his prince's chambers. But it was only when Ser and other maids joined him that Prince Aemond resigned himself to leave.
She did not notice, maybe because of the strees or the determination she had at the moment, but apparently she was trembling badly, for her master asked her to sit and drink tea with him. After that, and after another long and complicated talk, Marmalade was definitely left as a lady-in-waiting to her prince; and Ser Halland was left as one of his personal guards.
She only have few task, but she manage to did them well. Like making her master happy.
Mermelade doesn't know many things, she can't read, she can't write, she doesn't know how sarcasm works or the weird jokes the guards tell. Mermelada only knows that there are good and bad people... and his poor master has had to discover that one of his good people was actually a bad person.
Very bad.
But, despite all his shortcomings, Marmalade knows how to listen, and even though his mind and his master Lucerys' words are big and complicated, she knows that he feels sad, betrayed and alone.
No matter that everyone in the castle is on his beloved prince’s side, no matter that King Viserys said with complicated words that Jaecerys was no longer a worthy candidate for his crown; what mattered was that the Green Queen had given Marmalade the go-ahead to cheer her master up.
Would you believe that she even gave Marmalade several candies if she gave laxative herbs to her own son?
Of course she wouldn't sell herself so easily, a couple of meat pies and a piece of meringue were adequate payment for the One-Eyed Prince to spend a whole month indisposed. The candys were for her, the meet pies were for Ser. Halland, because he was the one who helped her sneaking away and distracting the ther prince's Aemond guards.
But that's not the point.
The Point is that, apparently, Marmalade is very good at making her master happy, because every time Marmalade takes Lucerys out for the village market (always in disguise, so they don't run into bad people, or so Ser Halland tells Marmalade) her master doesn't hesitate to go to the same fish stall to talk to the fisherman.
The fisherman and her master met during one of the firsts “secret” outings that she and the prince Lucerys did. He helped them to move around, be more cautios and brave arouend the commoners.
The fisherman was funny! Always making her master laugh and laugh!
But, one of the knight found out.
She was genuinely afraid that Ser Halland would prevent them from going out. Even more so considering that her master was now smiling more and eating again. Marmelade was terribly scared this time!!!!!
She just wanted to make him, his sweet prince, happy!
But thank the gods, Ser Halland just pulled out a small sword and joined her adventures in the city. Now were the three of them outing arround the capital, eating sweets, laughing and being happy.
Even Mermelada can say that the gentleman and the fisherman became good friends! They started to tell each other funny jokes among other things. Even thought she never get the jokes she also laughed with them!
And so went their routine of her and her prince. Escaping from the castle in the evenings, meeting the fisherman, and hanging out on the days when it was possible to do so.
Sometimes it was just Marmalade and Lucerys, sometimes it was just Lucerys and Ser Halland. But, as soon as they reached the fisherman's stall, it was just Lucerys and the fisherman.
Ser Halland, when he notices that their master and the owner are talking for a long time, takes Marmalade out and takes her to a nearby stall to watch from afar how the two interact. Occasionally he even buys her more sweet things or a new nightgown and explains that sometimes friendships grow best in privacy.
Although she understands that, she doesn't understand why Ser. Halland covers her eyes when his master gets too close to the fisherman's face. Or when he covers her ears when it seems his master Lucerys is talking about a sea voyage through Essos.
What's wrong with wanting to travel?
If Marmalade had ever had the chance to do it, she would have jumped on the first boat out there and gone around the world. There were so many things she doesn't understand but she wants to at least be there to see it!
But it doesn't matter, because Ser Halland tells her that they are fantasies of Prince Lucerys. He doesn't want her to get dizzy because of pure fantasies.
"Don't listen to him Marmalade, it seems our prince is telling his friend one of his many dreams."
Anyway, she doesn't care much anymore, because Ser Halland gives her a pretty rag doll (she doesn't notice how her master and his friend the fisherman are smiling at Ser Halland). She is so excited about her new doll that she completely forgets to ask her master why she walks in such a funny way or why she has purple make-up dots on her neck.
No matter, because Marmalade puts on a pair of thick leather collars she found at the market so her master won't be embarrassed back at the castle.
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Marmalade's job, although it sounds fun at times, is not so simple.
Although she is one of Lucerys' main maids, she, not having the degree of education required by the other maids, only refrains from being a "extra glorified nursemaid". Her role at court and in Lucerys' command is merely to distract her master, make him happy and help him feel comfortable. Kind of like a jester's job? She do not know, but at least she always made her master laugh.
That's why Marmalade has had to lear how to read, how to write, how to understand difficult words and not to jump at the first provocation. And just because she knows that her master gets sad if she doesn't do things right, she doesn't jump on the maid who had the nerve to insult her precious master.
"Prince Jaecerys may be a bastard, but at least he's a more princely bastard than Prince Lucerys, Prince Jacearys knows how to fight whith swords and pretty inteligents as well" Marmalade had heard once "No wonder Prince Aemond went after him instead of his husband."
She didn't hit that horrendous woman, but she definitely made sure the floor was so polished that the silly maid would be slipping until the end of time.
And the maid did!
But all that courage was not taken away from her.So when the Green Queen and the Crown Princess call her one day to ask her about the welfare of her prince... she thinks nothing of it. It was a cool place, full of pretty flowers and even prettier butterflies.
The ladies don't look upset or distressed, they simply want to know what the prince is doing. There's nothing wrong with that, is there?
So Marmalade tells them about the adventures they both have in the castle. How she and her prince and his knight friend run through the corridors looking for books, eating cakes, training, reading and buying fish.
The ladies are satisfied, give Marmalade some sweets and ask her, both by command and by request, never to leave Prince Lucerys' side.
"I would not leave my prince alone, your highnesses" she answered them seriously, as serious as she tries to be "My lord and master will always be happy; even if I have to tame a dragon myself to do it".
----------------------------------------
Ser Halland is a clever man, or so he likes to think.Well, he must be clever enough to make it to Prince Lucerys's warding position.
But he doubts his intelligence when it comes to Marmalade and The Pearl of the Realm.
Both children keep doing crazy things after crazy things. And Halland doesn't know if it's the prince's luck or the little maid's innocence that has kept the three of them from getting into disastrous trouble.
Of course, if it had been anyone else, he would have left them to their fate. But it was impossible to do so with his prince and his favourite maid. Marmalade was not even qualified to be a stable sweeper!
But she was so bubbly that the girl quickly climbed up to the level she was at.
The lack of good in her life made her clumsy and sometimes foolish, but like his prince, she had her heart and mind in the right place. That, at least he thinks, is why everything seems to be going so well for them.
He hides the evidence of the three of them running around the capital several 'days a week. He himself is in charge of distracting Marmalade, and making her happy, when he notices that his prince is falling in love again; he is in charge of getting to know Marmalade, while her prince is happy again.
He knows that if Marmalade is discovered, she will most likely be killed. For a maid to help a prince go to his mistress is still a serious matter. So, even though, at first as a duty, he took it upon himself to amuse her with things so that she wouldn't notice Lucerys sleeping with that fisherman.
So, in that way, her foolishness could propapbly save her.
It really was annoying (all the secret mistress stuff, after all the prince was the one who suffer the most. He deserved happiness), all the more so because he was getting himself into trouble by disappearing for so long, not taking care of his tasks. What could he say in his defence? Nothing.
Though, ironically, Marmalade herself, who was getting him into trouble, was helping him cover his faults.
"Ser Halland is teaching me to write," she had told his commander, she was so small in comparison and all her face was red as a cherry "I want to learn to write my prince's name and a paragraph of a chant of the septas. Please, do not reprimend him."
It was amusing to see how a little maid had saved him from so much trouble. So over time, he begins to like her and even helps her with her madness.
So, when he hears that Marmalade polished, poorly, the floor so that an idiot maid would fall.... well.
Let's just say he forced several of the new recruits to polish all the floors in the castle, to make sure Marmalade's plan worked. Incidentally, seeing Prince Aemond fall down a few corridors was the icing on the cake.
Those were, in fact, the best days of his life.
Mermelada didn't know what was going on.
Her prince was so exhausted after another stroll through the city centre that he hadn't even gone out to dinner with his sister-in-law and her sisters or his younger brothers. He went only to his chambers and she had to do all the work of undressing him and asking the other maids to help in changing and combing his hair.
At the end of the day, and after putting his master to bed and properly tucking him in, she simply decided to move things along while she watched over his sleep.
She had noticed how Princess Heleana had sent several embroideries with different rainbow insects for the prince, as well as scarves and embroideries of dragons and seahorses. They were beautiful! definitely made by a lady of high birth and great talent… the small detail was that due to her wanderings, her prince had completely forgotten to frame them in small wooden frames.
Marmalade knew, or so she had been taught by some maids older than her, that it was impolite not to take proper care of the gifts given to them by others.
"Well… think of it this way, Ser Halland would be very sad if he noticed your doll was dirty, wouldn't he?" Jane had said when she asked how she could keep the prince's new tablecloths "Because it implies that you don't care for something he took a long time to think about giving you. You can't carelessly put away handkerchiefs, you must square them up so that they at least look decorative."
Now, beside her wrist (to make sure her dolly it was not dirty and careless) she was carefully drawing on some old parchment the shapes of the frames for the handkerchiefs.
She lay quietly beside her doll, enjoying the fire burning and her master's breaths. Being. Halland was just outside the room, standing guard as he did every night…. and it just happened.
From one moment to the next, she was now tugging her prince who was barely awake with fear.
They both ran as fast as their legs and bare feet would allow them to run, and desperately jumped at any break of the servants she could remember to flee the place. The shouts in High Valyrian made her wince a little, sounding like insults in the way the prince clenched his hands and quickened his pace.
Naye knows how, but apparently one of the maids who were loyal to Prince Aemond had slipped in just as she was looking for new nightclothes for Lucerys. And seeing him naked, she had to warn the other prince about his husband's.
He tried to open the doors of the chambers with all his strength and his drawn sword.
Ser Halland had managed to open secret compartments for them and buy them time. They did not have much in what little they had managed to get out in time. In the pouch of her maid's uniform, she had tucked just at her doll, one of the gift handkerchiefs and a small pair of embroidery scissors that had been on the table at the time of the attack. Her prince had put one of the dressing gowns on her during the escape and now she had to find one of the secret exits of the palace in order to be able to.
She could only feel utter relief when she noticed Ser Halland calling out her name and leading her and her prince into one of the knight's passages to an outer part of the castle.
And just as they barely noticed the light of the campfires outside… someone tugged at her prince.
Marmalade didn't think much of it. She knew it wasn't Halland, for he was finding her and she was pulling Lucerys to secure a method of escape. It had to be the one-eyed prince; he had already found them.
The shouts in Valyrian were not understandable, but the tugging and her poor attempts to pull her prince away from her furious husband were no help. Halland was far back in the hallway after being kicked in an attempt to separate them (at which point Aemond had charged Lucerys and was only being held back by her trying to hit and trip him).
She was alone and her prince could not free himself no matter how hard he scratched and kicked. In a moment of weakness, or exhaustion considering the uphill battle it was to keep her master and herself in order, she noticed how Prince Aemond had loosened his grip a little.
She did not understand what he was saying to her prince, but she knew it was no good considering the look of disgust and hatred on his face and the increasingly victorious attempts to flee from the pressure. At the same time, he noticed how the knight was getting himself together again and was going for both of them.
And that's when she saw her chance.
So, without even thinking about it, and just as she had promised her Queen and Princess at the time… she simply made sure her prince was happy.
She did not hesitate, nor did she think about the consequences, but simply took the embroidery scissors from her pocket and stabbed him in Prince Aemond's leg.
He growl, like a injured animal and hit her head on the rock wall.
That's the last thing she heard. His Prince being carried away by Ser. Halland.
He, her prince, was shouting her name, traying to force Ser Halland to come back to her, but was imposible. Prince Aemond was standing up again, and she just repeat her attack. Everytime that was need it to give them time to scape
Just to end in the same situation every single time.
But, when the prince Aemond standed up again after her ultimate attack, Ser. Halland and his prince were not to be found. But that didn't seem to matter to the one-eyed prince, as he unhesitatingly stormed out of the secret corridor; leaving her alone and with her suspiciously wet head alone in the corridor.
Marmalade was cold, her head ached badly and was wetting more and more wet (even if there were not water in that place at all!), but now she was no longer alone in the street, naked and hungry. Now she knew she was dressed, beside her doll and making sure her prince was safe with Ser Halland.
So out of pain and exhaustion, she only closed her eyes in the hope of remembering the names of the streets of the city, the names of the candy and doll sellers; she knew that without those names she would not be able to meet her prince and Ser Halland again.
So she murmured them in her head, hoping that when she awoke, she would be able to see them and go to a new place of safety.
(So much for that, I don't know what else to put in it, if you can think of a hopeful ending for Marmalade,the fisherman, Lucerys and Ser. Halland you are invited to give them a good ending.)
Unrequited Lucemond where jace and aemond are having an affair behind Luke’s back (maybe they had always had a thing going on but somehow a marriage between Lucemond happens and Luke is so happy because he’s been pining for a while)
After some years of his marriage bed remaining cold and dozens of failed seduction tactics Luke finds out about the affair. The whole situation blows up during court or a big ball where everyone stands witness. Its so bad that not even Aegon cracks a joke.
Luke’s heartbreak turns to rage, leading him to fake his death soon after. Now everyone is looking at Jace and Aemond like 👁️👄👁️
#lucemond angst#lucemond#lucerys#aemond x lucerys#ship: lucemond#lucerys x aemond#aemond targaryen#angst#hotd
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Jason: Tim… is the Joker still alive?
Tim: Yes?
Jason: Exactly, it's the best example that you won't get your revenge right. Do what I do every so often.
Tim: Raid the mansion fridge because you're too lazy to go to the same supermarket Alfred goes to just to get your orange marmalade with nuts?
Jason:Besides that…have your automatic revenge contingency plan.
Dick: Tim, if you die, do you want to be buried or cremated? Like, if you were hit by a bus today, what do I do?
Tim: Go after the bus driver and make him pay for what he did to me. Avenge me, Dick. Avenge me!
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This... THIS!
This is art.
Okay but how funny would a ITSV au where Hobie was the one pulled into Miles dimension instead of Gwen be?
He shows up at Visions Academy, steals a uniform and immediately begins arguing with teachers about the classist nature of private education and the voucher system, but he's so smart and well read that no one ever figures out he's technically not enrolled at the Academy. Meanwhile Miles immediately starts crushing on this cool punk rock rebel who defies expectations but can't work up the courage to go up and say high.
Miles tries the shoulder touch, Hobie flirts back, and Miles turns invisible on the spot.
#spider punk#hobie brown#into the spider verse#miles morales#punkflower#spiderman#across the spiderverse#atsv
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So…
Hobbie mentioned that he did modelling work sporadically (yes, even with translator, subtitles and dubbing I didn't quite get his speech about his job besides spiderman).
The point is, Hobbie accepts a modelling job where he will be photographed as a couple for a LGTBQ rights march.
The little detail? The model who was to play his boyfriend got sick and they needed an urgent replacement.
At first she thought about calling Pav, but the idea was discarded because it was agreed that she had a post.post.post.post date set for too long. Sure, he was still an idiot, but he wasn't a total moron either.
Gwen fue descartada por completo cuando era niña... así que Miles era su única opción... aunque irrumpir en su universo, arrebatarlo de su cama donde dormía y arrastrarlo a la de his no era la cosa más pacifista.
Conclusion: Miles was pulled out of his pajamas, they put him in cute and cuddly sweaters to contrast with Hobbie's image, and the photo shoot was a success.
Miles can barely remember much, because he didn't have time to process everything that was going on… but Hobbie can't deny that he enjoyed seeing Miles wearing sunflower cardigans and looking like a sweet, blushing child, not knowing where to look when the photographer asked them to embrace romantically.
The only modeling paid that Hobbie actually enjoyed
i wanna read
Give me some punkflower pleaseeee. Not that there’s much, but boy is the number going up constantly, I’m so proud of us going strong.
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Forum response:
Original User Edit: According to my Megatrinian encyclopaedia they say they are born walking. I don't know how they go on 4 legs.
User 1: It depends a bit! Humans seem to go through different stages of development. They use their 4 limbs initially and then develop their motor skills on two legs. What you've probably seen is a human puppy exploring its habitat or a young human using all 4 limbs to get to a destination early.
And no, humans don't disappear. They are just good at standing still or going unnoticed.
User2: Ignore the texts of the Megatrinas, they are usually out of phase by 50 Mercurian cycles. They are bipedal, but only as they begin to mature into adulthood, and can be spotted early if you pay close attention. I would tell you to be very careful where you move in any case, as you may bump into one of these by mistake, and if you have any kind of hard body covering or thorns you can hurt them.
Original User: Oh, thanks for the advice, I was definitely an adult! I was just too lazy to walk normally. Regarding care in crashing1 I'll definitely have to wear a protective suit, as this human looks pretty clumsy!
From Human Questions forum of the Galactinet:
Question, human biology.
I saw my first human today. I think it was a juvenile. They looked much smaller than they are described in the textbooks.
Those same textbooks taught us that humans were bipedal.
But I was heading down a set of stairs when I saw this human (juvenile?) on all fours and scampering up the stairs like a quadruped!
Before I could react they'd passed me. I tried to see where they went but they seem to have vanished!
Are humans really quadruped? Have our textbooks been wrong?
Additional question: can humans turn invisible?
#Aliens#humans are space orcs#humans are confusing#humans are insane#humans are space capybaras#humans are space australians
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Batfam domestic shit
Moments that have definitely happened with the Batifamilia.
(Based a bit on my own family):
Dick, after a 6 month mission away from home, seeing Tim and Jason depressed on one of the couches doing their college homework: I left you two 100% functional brothers without an ounce of depression in your care!
Bruce: Still functional?
Dick: But 100% depressed!
-----
Dick: Damian would never replace us with anyone!
Tim: Don't believe it, he'd leave us stranded in the middle of space if it meant he could eat Thalia's Falafel and give Batcow massages!
Damian: Definitely, but I'd miss you guys a little bit.... well, not that much, but something to think about you guys.
Dick: ...
----
Steph: where's your chocolate?
Jason: Excuse me?
Steph: Your chocolate, where is it?
Jason: What makes you think I'll give you my chocolate?
Steph: What makes you believe that Alfred will never find out how his fine vessel was suspiciously destroyed last night.
Jason: Do you want the chocolate fudge sponge cake dipped in bittersweet chocolate or do you want the milk chocolate coins with strawberries?
----
Bruce:----
Tim: Just because Damian has a broken arm, Stephany overdoses on caffeine and Jason has neon blue hair doesn't mean he's a bad brother.
Bruce: What makes you a bad brother is that you let everyone wear white socks on freshly cut grass and a floor that's still fresh wax polish.
Tim: Oh shit.
----
Alfred: I'm afraid I've been driven to do this *Proceeds to boil water for maruchan soup* that's all you get when you eat out unannounced.
Damian: But Mrs. Kent said we were supposed to eat-
Alfred, turning off the maruchan pot: Oh well, if it's Mrs. Kent, who am I to complain?
#batman#batfamily#BatFam#batfamily shenanigans#batfam shenanigans#Jason Todd#dick grayson#Damian Wayne#Damian al Ghul#bruce wayne#Alfred Pennyworth#Stephanie Brown
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Really funny situations that definitely happened:
Thomas: Why are you sad my sweet boy?
Bruce: It's just that I just found out that they want to eliminate the elephants from the circus that just came through town. Dicki es soo sad papa! How can I tell him about Zika’s death?
Thomas: Alfred, do you remember if the Zoo owner owes you any favors?
-
Martha: Bruce! You have to go to school, you can't skip classes!
Bruce: No! I don't want to go if Professor X. is going to continue being xenophobic with my friend Thalia!
Martha, bringing out her strong foreign accent: Alfred, be a sweetie to me and please call the school board... I'll charge Susan that little favor for passing her the recipe for the honey pancakes.
-
Alfred: Master Wayne, you can't possibly keep bringing vagrants into the mansion.
Bruce: But... the mayor of the city has closed several shelters!
Alfred: I understand, Master Bruce, let me take care of finding them a new home.
No one knows, but the city has definitely improved in a macabrely good way just because Bruce has a heart of gold.
I live for Mafia princess Bruce I can't even front dksksjs in my mind he's like that rat girl from zootopia. Just imagine harvey dent getting in some debacle with Big Crime Daddy Thomas Wayne and Bruce is just pushing past the goons (part time nannies and cleaning ladies)
" Papa! You said no murder on Dickie's birthday!"
" I'm sorry, honey, daddy has to"
Harvey: I uh...I like your pearls
Bruce: ah! Thank you...
Thomas: oh no you don't! Martha! Prepare the Australian shark!
if i said it once i will glady say it a thousand times:
Martha and Thomas were societies darlings but they were GOTHAM'S society darlings so you know they were up to shit in the shadows. in a mafia au the "lights and sparkles hiding a dark, rotten underbelly" would be dialed up to 11. in Gotham nothings more beautiful than a naked blade.
that being said if they lived Bruce would have been so protected he almost genuinely didn't realize weird things were going on, partly because he's used to it and partly because the truly ugly stuff was hidden away.
Bruce: hey, Papa? what happened to my last boyfriend?
Thomas: he moved out of state :)
the man in question is dead because he forgot to show up with flowers (and also was running with a rival mob but that was less important)
Harvey is lucky Bruce likes him and he is genuinely sweet/good enough to Bruce that Thomas hesitates.
Thomas is a little despairing over Bruce's adoption habits especially when he took in Jason from a rival mob area but he can't say no to Bruce's sad eyes
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ADD means... by Roxi
Or... funny things about growing up with neurodivergence when there wasn't as much awareness about it m and yet you had a diagnosis:
That the easiest way for your parents to understand your diagnosis (parents who work in health-related fields) is that your brain has bad wiring and that your distractibility is a permanent thing.
That your parents don't understand how you can hate and love Jell-O, and not know how to explain to them that when the Jell-O batch is new there is no problem, but when it's been in the fridge too long the hard parts make you want to puke... but love the thick juice with chunks of aloe vera.
Having to explain to them how your school uniform sweater is terribly itchy, and if you add the seat belt they are sentencing you to the most frustrating car ride of your existence.
Corrected yours teachers cience speech blurp up an entire encyclopaedia, but not been unable to express why your math exam’s answer is correct.
Been bad at lying... but been good at making excuses time to time.
That neither you nor they can explain to them how you can fall asleep at school and come home to sleep more hours and still get cranky in the morning... nor do they understand how you can go three days without sleep and not be affected by it.
That you and your brother have to constantly explain to any family members how it's okay for him to crush you when you're lying down so you can relax and really concentrate.
That is ok to not know how to express emotions in the same whay or in the expected way thant other people do. Your parents are getting divorced? ok, that pretty sad and I’m here four you (yeah, that with a poker face, but full of real and good intentions). You give my for my birthday a simple ragdoll bunny? and I'm just normally happy because you remember I wanted a rabbit toy ( I would cry and shout like if I won the Lottery ).
Not knowing how you haven't grasped any of the information you've been studying for weeks by every possible method... but perfectly remembering the price and discounts on your brother’s and yours favorite cheese perfectly.
Forgetting your cell phone in the fridge, but always carrying so many things in your favorite purse that anything you need will be there.
Getting frustrated by getting lost or confusing the line of travel on your bus every day, but finding your way to the right place if you are walking there.
That you can be a master in charades, but no clue about enything else while you’re distract.
#add#neurodivergent#neurodivergencies#childhood nostalgia#adhd creature#funny#funny moments#roxi talks#inner self
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