#to something that people have always been aware of
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sixteen — what happened
mess it up — gojo x reader & sukuna x reader
⁀➴ when i told you i’m fine, you were lied to.
when the love of your life falls for someone else, you decide to move on—by pretending to date your best friend, the campus fuckboy.
previous — masterlist — next
word count. 2.1k
content. profanity, mentions of alcohol consumption, break up scene
Satoru swears that he must’ve missed the signs. He was always so good at reading you, at figuring out your next move, at trying to piece together what the next step was for the two of you. He was always alert, always aware. So he doesn’t know how he missed the signs, how he couldn’t see what must’ve been happening right before his eyes.
He remembers waking up the morning after one of Yuji’s infamous ragers, the ones that always sent people stumbling home at six in the morning, passing out in the classes that they were unlucky to have the next day. He remembers touching the space in his bed where you were supposed to be, eyes closed but certain that his fingers would eventually brush against the skin of your shoulder, the warmth of your neck.
He remembers opening his eyes then when all he was met with was the cold sheets of his bed. You had left your imprint on his mattress, but you were nowhere to be found.
He got out of bed, barely awake, but already intent on one goal: Finding you.
You couldn’t have wandered too far, but you weren’t in the bathroom down the hall—the one he shared with Yuta and Suguru—and you weren’t on the landing before the second floor, the one with a bay window that you often spent your time looking through with a cup of coffee in your hands.
Satoru nearly fell as he stumbled down the stairs, bare feet loud against the wooden steps. Where could you have gone? Where would he find you?
Eventually, he found his way to the dining room, letting out a sigh of relief when he saw you sitting at the table, eyes low as you nursed a glass of water in your hands.
He remembers how you looked at him then. Not with your usual bright smile. Not even your lazily hungover grin. You looked at him like a deer caught in the headlights, like you were somehow guilty of something he didn’t exactly know.
“Hey, princess,” he greeted, walking over to plant a kiss on your forehead. When his lips touched your skin, he noticed the way you flinched. It was small, a slight movement that could’ve been passed off as you simply moving against his touch. But he knew it was something else. He didn’t know how, but he could tell.
He pulled back, worry painted across his features. “You okay?”
You weren’t even looking at him, you had your eyes glued to the glass in your hands. You hummed, a strained sound, like you were trying to make it sound normal and you were failing horribly. “I’m good, ‘Toru,” you told him. “All good.”
He opened his mouth to ask you if you were sure. If you meant what you were saying. But he knew better than to question you.
You slipped out of your chair and started puttering about the kitchen, putting away bowls on the drying rack, placing slices of bread in the toaster, making a batch of fresh coffee. You were just trying to help out, you told him when he asked you why you were doing all that. Satoru couldn’t bring himself to press, to ask what was wrong, to ask why you were acting so strange.
When you left the house, you only gave him a peck on the cheek before you were rushing out the door. It was as if you couldn’t get out of there fast enough. You couldn’t stand to be around him any longer.
“She leave?” Naoya asked, stepping out of his bedroom. He yawned, stretching his arms behind his back as he did.
Satoru nodded, a frown on his lips. “Yeah,” he said. “She was… weird.”
His housemate chuckled. “What do you mean?”
“I don’t know,” Satoru said, because he truly had no clue what that was all about. “It was like she was avoiding me the whole time.”
“Ah, well, she’s a girl,” Naoya told him. “Girls are weird sometimes.”
Satoru couldn’t seem to argue with him. As much as he wanted to, the whole interaction with you had rendered him depleted, unable to think about anything other than the fact that you had been so distant. So cold.
Naoya patted him on the back on his way to the kitchen. “She’ll come around,” he said. “You gonna eat this toast?”
Your boyfriend shook his head. “You can have it,” he murmured. “I’ll be in my room.”
“Okay, big guy,” his housemate said. As Satoru started up the stairs, Naoya called after him, peering up at him when he stopped in his tracks. “I wouldn’t worry too much about it. Maybe she just needs some space.”
Satoru nodded. “Yeah,” he said. “Maybe.”
The next few days didn’t prove to be any better. Satoru tried continuing the little routines the two of you had built in your time together. Picking you up from training. Meeting with after your classes. Having dinner on nights when the two of you were free.
Everything seemed normal on the surface. A happy girlfriend with her devoted boyfriend. You played the roles well, but that was all it felt like—roles that the two of you were fulfilling for no other rhyme or reason aside from the fact that you were supposed to be a couple.
The change had happened seemingly overnight. Before that morning in the kitchen, Satoru hadn’t noticed a change in your behavior. The two of you were fine. Perfect even.
At Yuji’s party just the night before, you had been your regular sparkling self. You filled the room with endless conversation, mindless drunken chatter. At some point, you had even looked up from a conversation with Suguru to smile at your boyfriend when you realized that he was looking at you.
Satoru realized that was the last time you smiled at him that way.
It had been building up when it finally happened. When you decided to put the final nail in the coffin.
“I don’t think this is working,” you told him that afternoon on the steps of the science building. “I think we should break up.”
Even then, Satoru found himself caught completely off-guard. He had seen this coming and yet that didn’t seem to be enough. Because he didn’t know why it had come in the first place, he had no clue.
“But why?” he asked. He tried to reach for your hand, but you were already stepping back, already pulling away. You wouldn’t even look him in the eye. “You can’t just do this to us.”
You gnawed at your lower lip, playing with the hem of your shirt as you continued to avoid his gaze. “It’s not working,” you told him again, like it was the only thing you knew to say. “You’ve felt it too, haven’t you?”
“Tell me why.”
“Satoru, I don’t want to hurt you.”
The sound he let out was the most desperate one he’d ever made in his life. It was somewhere between a wail and a gasp, somewhere between pain and shock. “You’re already hurting me,” he told you. “At least have the decency to tell me why.”
“Because,” you said uselessly. You finally found it in yourself to look up at him, to meet his eyes, all wet now with tears. “‘Toru, please don’t cry.”
“Then don’t break up with me,” he insisted. “Princess, baby, please.”
But you were resolved. He could tell from the way you looked at him, your eyes full of tears, but also full of certainty. This wasn’t something he could argue his way out of. He could never argue with you. It was a winless fight.
What you said before you left would haunt him for the time thereafter. It would leave him with so many questions. So much confusion. So many sleepless nights, just trying to figure out what you meant. What possessed you to say such a thing.
“Maybe the next one will be the one for you,” you told him, offering him a smile that he was certain that he would remember for the rest of his life. Your lips quivered as you gave him one last look, one last pitiful goodbye, before you left, completely slipping out of his life.
She doesn’t know how to bring this up. It isn’t the kind of thing you can just casually mention in a conversation. Not the kind of thing you can just ask someone about without having to face the repercussions.
She’s spent the past few minutes trying to figure out what the right plan of action is. She gives up. Propriety be damned, she thinks as she marches over to the bed.
“Satoru, what is this?” Kimi asks, letting the thing fall from her hands and onto the duvet beside the spot where Satoru sits.
He put his towel down, caught in the middle of drying his hair. He raises his brow at her before looking down at the thing she’s just dropped. His eyes grow wide. Fuck.
“I, uh, that’s just—fuck—I don’t—why were you going through my things?”
Kimi frowns, crossing her arms over her chest. “I wasn’t going through your things,” she tells him. “I asked to borrow a shirt, remember? It was in your drawer.”
Satoru stares at the box on his bed. Small, just enough to fit in the palm of his hand, covered in the tell-tale velvet that these kinds of boxes come in. He doesn’t need to open it to know what’s inside. He already knows. It can only be one thing.
He offers his girlfriend a sheepish grin. “Right,” he says. “I did tell you to look in there.”
She looks at him expectantly. “So? Can you tell me what that is?”
Satoru picks the box up, holds it in his hand with a tenderness it doesn’t deserve. “Don’t make me say it.”
Kimi sighs and sits down on the bed beside him. She watches as he turns the box over, studying each of its edges, the groves at the spot where the box opens. She may not love Satoru, but she’s been around him enough to care about him. To not want him to hurt as badly as he does.
“Was that for her?” she asks.
He hums, unable to say the words out loud.
Kimi pulls her legs up on the bed and holds her knees to her chest, swaying side to side and allowing her shoulder to gently bump against his. “I know you don’t wanna talk about it,” she says. “But I think I deserve to know a few things. With me being your girlfriend and all.”
Satoru turns to look at her, smiling softly as he presses a kiss to her temple. “Yeah, I know,” he says. “What do you wanna know?”
“What happened to the two of you?”
“Damn, coming at me with the big guns, huh?”
She lets out a little laugh. “It’s really the only question I have.”
Satoru purses his lips and shrugs. “I don’t know,” he tells her. “I really don’t know.”
“Did you ask her?”
“I tried. When she ended things.”
Kimi stops swaying and reaches over to place a hand on Satoru’s thigh. “I’m sorry.”
His hand moves to cup hers. “Thanks.”
“What was she like before she broke up with you though?”
“What do you mean?”
“I dunno,” Kimi says, pulling her hand away and placing it on her lap. “It’s just that relationships don’t usually go from perfect to dead without something happening. Did you get in a fight?”
Satoru shakes his head. “No, not a fight,” he says. “But I did notice she was acting weird before that. I don’t know.” He looks at Kimi like a sad puppy, pouting. “You’re a girl, you probably have more insight than me. What do you think happened?”
“Well, I don’t know her that well,” Kimi says. “Or you for that matter. But…”
“But?”
“When someone breaks up with you out of nowhere, there was probably a trigger,” she tells him. “Maybe she did something. Or maybe you did. Or maybe something happened in her life that had something to do with your relationship. Or maybe someone said something to her, got in her head, you know. Could be a bunch of things, but it was probably something.”
It’s not a lot, but hearing her say it just confirms what Satoru’s been thinking this whole time. Something must have happened for you to change so drastically, for you to want out of the relationship just like that.
He looks at the box in his hand. Inside is the ring that he—admittedly stupidly—picked out way before either of you were actually ready to get married. He had a lot of hope in the two of you, and he knows that for the longest time, you did too.
He doesn’t know what happened. He doesn’t know if he ever will.
notes. needed to give my boy gojo some screen time 😌 we’re also getting closer and closer to what caused the break up and it’s getting more and more confusing 🫣
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what was i made for | jk
⏤ pairing: jungkook x female reader
⏤ genre: strangers to lovers, fluff, and smut
⏤ rating: 18+
⏤ warnings: a tiny bit of sad oc, alcohol consumption, oral sex (m receiving), swearing, some teasing, praising, penetrative sex, protected sex, rough sex, creampie, and multiple orgasms
⏤ words: 8,833
⏤ summary: have you ever met someone with whom you instantly clicked? well yes, but never to the extent of how it happened with jungkook. in a matter of days, he made you feel like the prettiest and most special woman. right there and then, you understood what you were made for.
⏤ author’s note: hi loves! here you have this fic! it was a pleasure to write it since it's been a while that i haven't written fluffy fics. i hope you enjoy it & it's always a pleasure to know what you think about it! have a wonderful day & week ahead!
MASTERLIST
Turning 30 wasn’t exactly how you pictured it to be. Since a very young age, you thought that by this stage you’d be in a long-term relationship and probably a mother. As years passed by, you simply hoped that you’d be in a relationship but all the dates you endured the past year made you realize that it would never be the case.
Being single has never made you sad, you actually always enjoyed being on your own. Being independent is something you always sought to have, and you deeply treasure having it. However, this is quite a milestone in life and this time, being alone has a bit of a bittersweet taste. And it hurts. Although, in a way, you try to convince yourself that it’s better to be alone than in a bad relationship.
As you’re looking at the people sitting at the table, most of them are engaged or married or living together, or having a child. Before, it used to not hurt you but today, it’s quite hard to look at them all with happiness. Nonetheless, the reason why you’re all gathered today truly makes you happy. Your best friend, Jin proposed to his girlfriend, Iseul and they reunited all their close friends to announce the fantastic news. You’re the only one aware of this because he asked for your advice for the proposal.
The only other person aware of this is Jimin, Iseul’s brother. Jin prefers to have his approval since they are very close. He also asked for her father’s approval as the gentleman that he is. You got to meet Iseul’s brother quite a lot of times and he’s definitely a sweetheart. Jin and Iseul tried to set you up but between you, there’s only friendship, nothing more.
While looking, your eyes land on a man who catches your attention. He’s honestly quite handsome, a kind of handsome you’ve never seen before. He looks innocent without looking innocent. It sort of doesn’t make sense but that’s how you’d describe him. Looking at his cute features makes him look quite innocent but then, his vibe definitely breathes ‘not innocent’. Maybe it’s caused by his short haircut. You’re not sure although that’s how you perceive him.
For sure, you’re convinced that he’s probably already in a relationship. Guys like him are usually taken. They don’t stay single for a long time, they easily charm every person around them, and they can find their person quite fast. Your eyes meet and he offers you a little smile, one that you return.
“Hey guys,” Jin says a little louder to get everybody’s attention. “Today, Iseul and I gathered you here to share some wonderful news.”
A bright smile appears on your face.
Iseul shows her left hand with her engagement ring and points it out. “We’re getting married,” she yells with evident joy.
Everybody starts congratulating them for their engagement, and they all seem extremely happy with this announcement. It warms your heart to be a part of this big step in their lives. Getting married is quite something, and you’re deeply and truly happy for them.
During the dinner, you find out that the hot guy’s name is Jungkook. He’s actually Iseul’s cousin. Him and Jimin are quite close. Jimin frequently mentions him and you’ve heard many stories about them. It’s great to finally put a face on a name. Especially since he’s a very good looking man.
At some point, you realize that everybody is discussing in the living room, except for you, Jimin, and Jungkook. Throughout the evening, they slowly moved, leaving you alone with them. You’re having a very animated conversation about desserts.
“Tiramisu is the best dessert ever,” you say. “There’s nothing you can say that will change my mind.”
They are trying to convince you that chocolate mousse or lemon cheesecake are much better than anything else. For sure, those are good desserts but not as good as a tiramisu. Nothing will ever beat a good old tiramisu.
“Pff, you’re saying nonsense, yn,” Jimin replies.
You roll your eyes which makes Jungkook laugh. Honestly, it’s been fantastic to interact with them. They are super funny, they have a very good dynamic. Through that, you get to see that Jungkook isn’t just pretty on the outside, he definitely seems to have a good heart. That convinces you even more that this man isn’t single at all. A man like him isn’t on the market anymore. A lucky girl must be waiting for him at home.
“Every word that leaves my mouth is only the truth,” you say with a little smirk on your face.
Both men laugh even more. They aren’t convinced at all that you only say the truth, they actually don’t agree with you that tiramisu is the best dessert ever.
“You’re very funny, yn!” Jimin says.
You roll your eyes once more but you’re simply happy to share this moment with them. They manage to make you forget how sad you’ve been feeling for the past month. It’s been hard but you’ve been trying to cheer yourself up because it’s a feeling that is not easy to deal with.
“I quickly need to go to the bathroom,” Jimin adds.
You and Jungkook simply nod before your friend leaves you alone. For a brief moment, there’s a little silence between you but it’s not an awkward one. Then, his eyes meet yours with a little smile on his face.
“I’m happy to finally meet the girl Iseul tried to set Jimin up with,” he says.
“Oh, you heard about that,” you reply with a smile appearing on your face.
“Of course,” he responds. “Iseul talked so much about it, she really wanted you to be together.”
She told you that a million times but you and Jimin weren’t meant to be together. At least that’s what you believe. There’s a lot of love and respect between you but it will never be more than that. He’s simply a close friend. A friend you’re more than grateful to have in your life.
“She’s terrible!” you shake your head with a little smile on your face. “I don’t get why she had to tell everybody about it.”
For sure, it annoys you a bit that she had to tell the world she wanted you to be with her little brother. But she’s one of your bestest friends, and you cherish her friendship more than anything else. It was such a sweet gesture to try to help you out with your love life.
Then, right there, you see in his eyes the pity appearing. He doesn’t need to say anything else for you to understand what he’s going to say. They all give you that look when they’re about to say that you’re single.
“She wants to help her dear friend to find someone,” he mumbles.
Your eyes glance down at your hands. It’s better that he doesn’t see the sadness appearing all over your face. Even though it comes from a good intention, it makes you feel like a pathetic girl that isn’t able to find someone, especially when you’re talking about it with a handsome man.
“She’s also been wanting to do it with me,” he adds. “She keeps saying that a soldier shouldn’t be single. It doesn’t make any sense to me but I guess she simply adores setting people together.”
A smile appears on your face before you look up. In a way, you feel like he said that to cheer you up but it still feels nice that he tried to not make you feel alone. However, you’re a bit surprised to hear that he’s a soldier. You would have never imagined him serving in the military.
“Probably,” you reply. “But in my case, it’s mostly out of pity because I’m 30 and still single. All our friends are in relationships, married or parents.”
“I’m sure that’s not the reason,” you instantly say. “Iseul is like that, she loves to help.”
You take a deep breath, he’s absolutely right but it’s becoming heavy to be the only single one out of all your friends. Every single friend of yours present here is in a relationship. Most of them are already married, and a couple of them are parents. It’s not easy to look around and see everybody succeeding on all those aspects in life. The only thing you can brag about is your career.
And because of all that, sometimes you wonder what you are made for.
“I know she just wants to help because she’s aware of how heavy the pressure from society can be,” you tell him. “And it has been quite heavy since I turned 30. It’s hard to look around and see everybody getting married or buying their houses or announcing a pregnancy while I’m extremely far from achieving that.”
Jungkook nods. You’re not convinced he can understand you, you’re not sure he’s even single as he’s claiming. Society treats men and women completely differently. For a man, it’s totally okay to not be married or to have a child by the age of 30. It’s even remarkable if they put their careers first. But you’re fully aware that everything isn’t rainbows and sunshines for men as well.
Nonetheless, it is surprising how comfortable this man has made you feel. This morning, you weren’t even aware of his existence, and now, you’re talking about how you’ve been feeling. What you ignore is that it's a shared feeling.
“I’m sorry to be talking about my problems,” you say.
“No, no,” he says. “Don’t worry at all about that!”
You swiftly start discussing other topics. At some point, you find yourself wondering where Jimin is but he has discreetly joined the others in the living room, leaving you alone. He noticed the way you were deeply talking, and he didn’t want to disturb you. For sure, you appreciated the opportunity because you got to learn a bit more about Jungkook.
After the engagement party of Iseul and Jin, you exchanged numbers with Jungkook and since then, you’ve been spending your days texting him. It has been making you extremely happy. He’s making you feel seen, a sensation that has been absent from your life for a while. Not all the men you dated elicited that feeling in you, but it’s also not something new. However, right now, you don’t want to think about the ex that provoked that feeling.
What you truly appreciate about Jungkook is the fact that he always warns you when he will take some time to reply. He always tells you when he’s going to do a certain thing that will cause him to go to sleep at 4 am and that he won’t be able to reply. Nonetheless, he always texts you before going to sleep, no matter the time.
“How are things going with my cousin?” Iseul asks while you’re walking to her car.
It truly amazes you how this woman ends up discovering everything when it comes to the dating life of someone.
“How do you know?” you inquire.
A smirk appears on her face.
“Well, at my engagement party, you were all over each other, which made me extremely happy, to be honest,” she explains. “Since then, you’ve been smiling like an idiot all the time, and your phone crazily buzzes. It’s not complicated to understand that you two are flirting.”
The word ‘flirting’ violently hits you. You never considered that you were flirting but now that she’s saying it out loud, it definitely is the truth.
“I should have thought about trying to set you up together,” she says.
You roll your eyes while shaking your head. She’s always thinking about setting people together but that’s one of her charms. She’s always so considerate of people around her, she wants people to be happy.
“Maybe if you had that idea, it would have never worked,” you reply.
The thought of being set up with Jungkook is weird because you adore the way things started between you. You can’t imagine it any other way. Now, you’re simply grateful he’s part of your life. For the past month, he’s been contributing a lot to your happiness, and you only hope that it’ll be the case for a long time.
“Probably,” she quickly replies, “but I’m glad you’re talking and discovering each other,” she adds. “You deserve more than anyone else to be happy.”
She takes you in a heartfelt hug, one that warms your soul. She’d noticed how sad you’d been since you turned 30, and it shattered her heart to see you like that. She’s seen how hard it has been for you to not find your person even though you said the opposite. She could see the pain behind the smile you were always showing.
She’s fully aware that being in a relationship doesn’t determine the person you are, but she knows how it can sometimes make you feel lonely. When it happens, it hurts, and not just a bit. Iseul admires you. You’re so independent, you don’t rely on anybody else. Most of the time, when she needs to go somewhere, she calls somebody to not be alone because she hates that feeling.
She drops you out at your place, and you enjoy a bit of your time alone at home. After being out with Iseul, you need a few hours of rest. Honestly, she exhausted you. Thankfully, tomorrow is Sunday and you’re planning on staying at home the full day. But someone ruins your moment alone by ringing at the door.
As you open the door, you’re graced with a man holding a massive bouquet of flowers.
“Ms y/l/n?” the man raises as he takes the bouquet down.
“Yes,” you reply and frown.
“This is a delivery I have for you,” he hands you the bouquet. “Can you please sign here?”
“Let me just put the bouquet down, please,” the man nods while you place the bouquet on your table.
You come back real quick and sign the receipt. The man leaves, you close the door, and go to the living room to take a proper look at the bouquet. It’s a very impressive one but it’s definitely a wonderful one. There’s a little card on it which intrigues you. Who could possibly send it?
‘A wonderful bouquet for the most wonderful woman, Jungkook. Ps: sorry I couldn’t hand it myself to you.’
Your heart melts right there. This man is slowly but surely making you fall in love with him. The bouquet is so pretty, it’s actually the prettiest a man has ever given to you. It’s for sure a pity he couldn’t have given it himself, you would have wanted him to be here with you right now. Nevertheless, it’s still a magnificent gesture. One that you’ll cherish for a long moment.
Jungkook is on a special mission this weekend which prevents him from returning home. Usually, he only works during the week but there was an unexpected event this weekend. To be honest, it kind of broke your heart because you were eager to spend some time with him. Since he works and sleeps in the barracks during the week, the only time you get to see him is the weekend.
Being away from you doesn’t prevent him from speaking with you and calling you every day, but it’s very different from being together. Nonetheless, you feel like it also helps to build a stronger connection. Once you get to see each other, you try to get the most out of it.
You grab your phone and send him a message. Jungkook told you that his phone will remain at the quarters and that he wouldn’t be able to speak with you. So calling him will be useless, it’s best to leave a message that he’ll see when he’s back.
That night, you fell asleep with the brightest smile. Jungkook has been making you feel so special since the moment you met him. There’s no doubt that you’ll try to keep him around as long as possible.
The next Monday, after leaving work, you find Jungkook at the main entrance. After this intense and tough work day, it definitely makes your day a hundred times better. As soon as he sees you, he smiles and walks in your direction to meet you halfway. While getting closer to him, you notice that he’s wearing his military uniform. The first thought that crosses your mind is that he came straight after leaving the barrack. In a way, it warms your heart he did it, however, you can’t help but think of how tired he must be.
Also, seeing him with the uniform makes you weak. It’s the first time you’re seeing him for real wearing it, and let’s just say that he’s more than fine. Without sounding too horny, you’d even say that you’d open your legs right now if he’d ask.
“Hey, Jungkook,” you say once you’re right in front of him. “What are you doing here?”
The man in front of you kisses your cheek, causing shivers all over your body. Your smile grows bigger. This part of your life is filled with so much happiness, something you wouldn’t have imagined a couple of months ago when you turned 30. It’s so surprising how life can completely change in a second. Meeting Jungkook has drastically changed your life but you wouldn’t have wanted it in any other way.
“Hello, yn,” his eyes don’t leave yours. “Just wanted to see your pretty face since I couldn’t for the past week.”
Your cheeks instantly turn red but you take the compliment. Your eyes are lost in his, people around you completely disappeared. It’s just you and him. For a brief moment, his eyes look down at your lips yet you don’t notice it otherwise you would have maybe kissed him. His right hand caresses your cheek causing your eyes to close for a split second.
“There’s a nice bar/coffee place where I’d like to take you,” he breaks this intimate moment with his words.
You nod. He takes your hand to guide you until the place he’s talking about. It’s actually not too far from your workplace. As you step inside, you can’t help but find it extremely cozy. There are quite a few people, not a lot but still. At the end, you notice there’s a photobooth. A couple is leaving it with a bright smile on their faces before they check out the pictures they took. As you see them, you desire nothing more than to try it with Jungkook. It’ll create great memories.
“Could we take pictures in the photobooth?” you ask pouting to get what you want.
The man holding your hand doesn’t resist so he nods. A broad smile spreads across your face, filling you with happiness that he accepted. Now, you’re the one guiding him to the end of the bar. He’s also smiling as it brings a lot of joy to him to be with you right now. It’s his only free day of the week, and all he wanted was to be with you. You’ve brightened his life the second you appeared.
When you open the curtains to get inside the little cabin, you freeze as you realize that there’s only a small stool. But before you say anything, Jungkook gets inside, sits on the tool and places you on his lap. It definitely surprises you but it also warms your heart. You close the curtain before taking a look at the man that has been making your heart beat for the past month.
“Since we’re here,” he starts.
You notice a little bit of nervousness in his eyes, and for some unknown reason, it increases the pace of your heartbeat.
“The reason I wanted to bring you here,” he’s clearly nervous, especially since you’re really close to him. “Because I wanted to ask you if you’d want to become my girlfriend.”
Now, for sure, your heart is beating like crazy and at the same time melting at his words. It’s incredibly adorable that he actually raised the question, none of your exes did it previously. On top of it, he looks absolutely charming. This man owns your heart. Honestly, it means the world that he took the time to raise the question. At least, it will be official the second you say ‘yes’.
Since he’s scared to be rejected, he starts to fill the void. “It’s my only day off and all I wanted was to see you to ask...” Before he can even finish his sentence, you gently press your lips on his while grabbing his face in your hands. It’s a simple smack but one that says a thousand words. One that finally happens after all those weeks of flirting. One that finally resumes how you’ve been feeling. Hopelessly in love.
“Yes,” you reply when you break the kiss.
The largest and most radiant smile lights up his face. His smile is quite contagious as you smile back at him. The two of you are simply and utterly filled with happiness. Jungkook presses his lips on yours for a passionate kiss.
The kiss is sweet and tender, there’s no rush or anything else in it. This moment has been desired by the two of you for a little while already. His strong arms wrap tighter around you almost as if he’s scared you’ll disappear.
His lips are so soft on yours, the tenderness of the kiss making your heart melt completely. Never a man has kissed you like that. Your heart is pounding extremely hard on your chest while the butterflies on your lower stomach are making you feel completely alive.
Your little hands cup his face while you kiss him passionately. There’s absolutely no doubt that he’s a good kisser. This first kiss with him will for sure be a memorable one unless he gets even better at kissing with time. Out of breath, you break the kiss.
“Maybe we should take those pictures before people throw us out of here,” you say.
Jungkook nods before inserting a coin. In a matter of seconds, the little screen shows that you should press play, and he follows the instruction. You strike a first pose, you’re both looking at the camera with a gleaming smile. For the second pose, Jungkook presses a kiss on your cheek which makes you blush. For the third one, he kisses you tenderly.
This will be without any doubt a memorable day.
Once the kiss is over, you leave the little cabin. Two sets of pictures are printed. You grab them and hand one to Jungkook. Your eyes stare at the pictures, they are wonderful. For you, they clearly show the way you feel about each other. The way Jungkook makes you happy. The way you love him.
For the past 3 months, you’ve been in a relationship with Jungkook. It’s a bit odd to be dating a soldier. Honestly, you always kind of had a bad image of them when it comes to relationships. Yes, they are brave, and it’s truly admirable that they sacrifice themselves for the nation. But you always believed they were womanizers, something that your boyfriend has been proving you wrong. He’s actually far from being a Don Juan. Iseul has also mentioned it a million times.
As you noticed, even if he’s assertive when it comes to you, he’s actually quite reserved. Hence, he never had a lot of girlfriends. It’s difficult for him to approach women but he confessed that with you, it was easy. He felt that he could be himself without feeling judged. He felt that he didn’t need to hold back to impress. He felt that he could simply be Jungkook. Sometimes, you feel that his shyness and his job are simply contradictory. But for you, it’s what makes him special.
Today, Jungkook gets to leave the barrack a bit earlier and he invites you to spend the night at his place. Quite frankly, you’re a bit nervous. Lately, your conversation almost always deviates in a way into sex, you’re grateful to have those conversations. However, you realize that one day, you’ll make love. You haven’t done anything so far, even oral sex. None of you has really made it happen even though it’s quite obvious that there’s a massive physical attraction.
Having sex is making you nervous because it’s been a while since you last did it. Of course, it’s naturally something you crave but you’re scared to be bad at it. You’re scared that this first time together will be a disaster which you don’t want. You don’t want it to be perfect too. All you want it to be is pleasurable.
When you’re at the door of the building complex, you ring the doorbell. He lets you in so you take the elevator to reach the 5th floor. Jungkook is living in a little building complex, it only has 5 floors so his apartment is on the last floor. Per floors, there aren’t many apartments which makes this little complex quite cozy. When you reach the 5th floor, you walk until the door of his apartment. The door is a tiny bit opened, you still knock at the door.
“Come in,” Jungkook screams.
You do as he says, but you make sure to close the door behind you. The apartment is plunged into darkness, except it is lit with candles a bit everywhere. There are petals indicating you the path to follow, this is incredibly romantic. As you reach the living room, you notice that a table was put in the middle with dinner already served. Next to the table, Jungkook is standing tall with a bright smile on his face. In his hand, he’s holding a bouquet. It’s a pretty massive one but a wonderful one.
He looks absolutely stunning.
Even in the darkness of the room, you can see how handsome he looks, and honestly, as long as he’s smiling, he looks stunning to you. With Jungkook, it’s not only about the looks. Most of the time, you find him stunning on the inside. The way he brings you comfort, the way he takes care of you, the way he treats you makes him absolutely handsome. His extremely hot physique is only an extra.
A smile instantly appears on your face as you walk in his direction.
“This is your monthly bouquet,” he says while handing you the bouquet.
You take it, while plunging your nose in it to smell the sweet fragrance of the flowers. The bouquets that he chooses always have the best perfume. Your apartment always smells like heaven, and the sweet fragrance of flowers is something that you now associate with Jungkook.
“This time around you went out of your way to offer them,” you teasingly say.
The smile on your boyfriend’s face grows bigger. He looks particularly glowy today, something special irradiates from him. He breaks the tiny little space between you, you move the bouquet to your right so Jungkook doesn’t smash it as he gets closer to you. His right hand rests on your back, drawing you nearer to him. You look up at him, your faces barely away from each other, and before you can even comprehend he crashes his lips on yours for a gentle kiss.
“I’ll do everything to make my girlfriend happy,” he whispers against your lips.
Those words free some little butterflies in your stomach, and you can’t help but smile at his words. Never before have you been this happy. You rest your head against his chest. Every day for the past months, you’ve been feeling extra lucky. Jungkook holds you tight in this heartfelt embrace.
“I’m so lucky to have you,” you mutter.
Even if you thought he didn’t listen to you, he did but said nothing. All he did was smile like an idiot and feel even more grateful to have met you.
His entire life he thought he’d never manage to find someone because it’s been hard to find someone that looks beyond his body. Every girl that he meets simply wants to have sex with him. The combo of being in the military and having a buff body has attracted many girls, but they crave something that he doesn’t want. Plus, he’s also quite shy so he feels awkward every time he’s around a good-looking girl.
But he fell hard for you. And every day, he falls even harder, something he never thought possible.
He presses a gentle kiss on your head. “We should start eating before it gets too cold,” he informs you. You nod before breaking apart from him.
He suggests putting the flowers on the little coffee table that he put in one corner. You look once more around you, it astonishes you how wonderful his place looks when being lit up by candles. Jungkook takes the time to admire his marvelous girlfriend, you. You’re wearing a light pastel orange dress, it’s a nice dress you found in Zara. A bit expensive but a pretty one for a date.
The dinner goes quite well, but you both drink a lot of wine. To some extent, it was a way for you to relax a bit, you’re quite obviously a bit nervous. Your boyfriend notices it. However, he understands it. The sexual conversations have turned him on, and his girlfriend is extremely sexy. Every time he lays eyes on you, he can’t help but think that you’re the sexiest woman he has ever seen. Even his exes don’t even get close to how sexy you are.
And that dress you’re wearing, uff… he can’t even think properly.
Jungkook is aware that you haven’t shared an intimate moment with a man in a while so he perfectly understands your nervousness. His last intercourse happened like 8 months ago, it was with a girl Iseul was trying to set him up with. Needless to say, a couple of days later, it ended.
As the gentleman that he is, he doesn’t try anything nor does he say anything sexual. His priority is to make you feel safe around him. He can wait, there are other ways to relieve himself while he patiently waits for you to be ready. On your side, you’re genuinely thankful he exhibits great patience with you.
In the end, you ended up falling asleep in his bed with him. Both of you wanted to spend the night together. For sure, you’re aware that there are some chances that you end up making love but with the alcohol in your system, it kind of makes you less nervous about it.
In the middle of the night, you’re both woken up by a strange noise. At first, it definitely seems weird but quickly, the noise is accompanied by moans. You blush as you realize that Jungkook’s neighbors are having sex. You hide yourself under the blanket, and it makes Jungkook chuckle.
“It’s not funny,” you tell him.
“It is,” he says as he joins you under the blanket.
There’s barely any light so you can’t properly see him.
“It’s so embarrassing to hear people making love.”
“Why so?” he raises.
“Because it’s supposed to be an intimate moment and knowing that neighbors can hear you destroys the intimacy of the moment,” you answer.
A little smile appears on his face. He undoubtedly finds you extremely adorable, and it’s incredibly obvious that it’s been a while since your last intercourse. When it comes to sex, sometimes, he feels like he’s older than you due to the obvious fact that he has some more experience. In reality, you’re older than him but most of the time, it doesn’t feel like it.
“They don’t even realize that,” he says.
“How could they? I mean, they should know that they are being loud.”
“They are enjoying the moment and not realizing that they are moaning a bit too loud,” he adds. “Don’t you remember the last time you made love?” he asks. “Normally, you’re so absorbed that you don’t even comprehend if you’re making too much noise or not.”
For a minute, you think about it. He’s not wrong, when you’re in the moment, you only care about the pleasure, not about the noises nor how dirty sex can be. It’s just you and your partner.
“They definitely sound like they’re having fun,” he teasingly adds.
You know that he’s trying to lighten the mood but you’re still slightly embarrassed. You try to relax a bit, this is a natural thing. Couples make love, even strangers have sex for fun. In any case, it’s normal. There’s no need to be ashamed or embarrassed.
“For sure,” you reply with a little smile.
Jungkook is glad that you’re replying to his little tease. Your boyfriend gets a little closer to you, his hand caressing your arm.
“Even under the blanket, we can perfectly hear them,” he retorts.
You chuckle at his words. You’re grateful that he’s trying to make you feel comfortable. For you, it proves once more how beautiful on the inside he is.
“But let me tell you that they are even louder during the day,” he tells you. “They make love a lot of time.”
“Oh, so you’ve been listening to this quite a lot?” you ask.
“Yep,” he simply says. “On a Friday evening, when I come back from the army, I get to hear them all night long to my greatest delight. And don’t be here on a Sunday…”
Now, it’s a little laugh that escapes your lips. This sound is what warms your boyfriend’s heart. He loves to hear you laugh, and what he adores more is to see the way your face lights up. Right now, he can’t see your face well so he pictures it.
“It mustn't be funny,” you say. “It also explains why we barely come here.”
“Eeeh, you finally get it,” he states.
His hand moves higher to reach your cheek and he keeps doing some circles to shoote you. It certainly works.
“They are always on fire so it’s better to avoid being here,” he adds. “Especially when I was single.”
“So now that you’re not single, it’s easier?” you ask while raising an eyebrow.
A smile appears on his face. Having you has made everything easier. And for sure, it’s less of a torture to hear his neighbors having sex because all he can think about is you.
“For sure, I can think of my wonderful girlfriend to distract myself from this torture.”
Now, your hand moves to his cheek to caress it. Your boyfriend closes his eyes when your soft fingers touch him.
“I still don’t get how such a wonderful man like you had trouble finding someone,” you express.
His hand places a strand of hair behind your ear.
“Nice men have trouble finding someone,” he informs you. “Girls usually prefer bad boys over a guy that treats them right. I was shy too so it definitely didn't help and being in the army only attracted women who wanted sex. I was never interesting enough.”
You can hear his voice breaking at the end. It hurts to hear those words, especially coming from a man with a golden heart. In just over 3 months, he has made you feel so special like no other man has before.
But he only states the truth. Most girls chase bad boys, almost as if they hope to change them into nice boys but it’s never the case. They always end up breaking their hearts. Nice men are not seen enough, and it breaks your heart, especially since now you’re dating one.
“You are more than interesting, Jk,” you say.
You press a soft kiss on his lips.
“You’re the first girl that truly sees me for who I am.”
This breaks your heart even more. Jungkook deserves the world, and he deserves more than anybody else to be happy.
“And you’re the first man that truly sees me for who I am,” you instantly tell him.
His neighbors are still making love but now you don’t hear them, you are simply absorbed by each other. There’s only you. The world around you completely disappeared.
Now, it’s Jungkook who presses a gentle kiss on your lips. His lips are so soft on yours, the tenderness of the kiss making your heart melt completely. However, this gentle kiss slowly turns into a passionate and fervent one. A kiss that speaks a thousand words. A kiss that says that you love each other. A kiss that makes you both feel seen. It’s a kiss that you both craved for years.
You’re deeply kissing each other, and by the looks of it, this kiss is for sure going to take a heated turn. A turn that both of you want. You’ve been obviously nervous about this but right now, there’s nothing more that you crave. Your only wish right now is to feel even more loved by this wonderful soldier.
His impatient hands move down to your waist to bring you even closer to him. They run up and down your waist, making you more than happy to have his large tattooed hands on your body. Your hands, on the other side, go to his hair to softly run through it.
“I’ve fallen so hard in love with you, yn,” he says as he breaks the kiss.
As much as you can, you look at him with an idiot smile on your face. There are millions of fireworks inside you caused by what he just said. There’s no more doubt that you’re madly in love with this man. He owns your heart.
“Maybe not as much as I did,” you add.
Jungkook presses a peck on your lips before he kisses the corner of your lips down to the underside of your jaw, causing little moans to escape your mouth each time his lips touch your skin. Jungkook is making you feel alive and also driving you into complete euphoria. Even though you’re starting to get lost, you’re slowly realising what is about to happen. You’re going to make love with your boyfriend.
In the end, there was no reason to feel nervous to share an intimate moment with your boyfriend. He loves you. And he will obviously do everything to help you feel good.
He drops his head to your neck, kissing the base of your throat. You moan as he starts leaving a trail of kisses, the feeling of his mouth on your throat is divine. Everything he does exceeds all your expectations. Regardless of your nervousness, you of course dreamt of what it would be to have sex with him. So far, he’s undoubtedly surpassing all of your expectations.
Your hands run through his hair, tugging at the roots. A moan escapes his pretty lips, his voice vibrating against your skin. This slowly starts to feel like heaven. His lips move up again to meet yours for another fervent kiss.
“It’s getting too hot under this blanket,” he affirms.
“Yep,” you manage to say.
Jungkook removes the blanket from your bodies, and you can finally see him somewhat better. His short hair looks messy, causing a bright smile to appear on your face. Instantly, the urge to run your fingers through his hair comes across your mind. There’s no need to say that you did it, and that he loved feeling your fingers in his hair.
“You’re breathtakingly beautiful,” he whispers while his eyes scan your face.
“Thanks, Jk,” you smile at him. “And you’re the prettiest man I’ve ever laid eyes on.”
The way you both make each other feel is so indescribable but you’re absolutely sure to have found the right person. You make each other feel special.
“I want to make love to you, yn,” he lets you know. “I’m craving you so much.”
You kiss him. You also crave him in an unimaginable way. His large hands caress your waist while you both look intensely at each other before you uncover your bodies frim the blanket. In a matter of seconds, you’re fully naked in front of each other. Your eyes glance down at his cock. In all honesty, it’s quite big.
“It’s massive,” you look up at him. “How have you been hiding it in your pants?” he giggles at your words.
“That’s something that I’ve been wondering every day for the past 3 months,” he says, clearly making you understand that he gets pretty hard around you every day.
Without any warning, you wrap your hand around the base of his dick. This sudden move surprises him which causes him to whimper. Your eyes watch down at his impressive crotch. The head is red, precum running down his length and over that prominent vein that lines it. You rub your thumb over the tip before going down on his shaft, spreading his arousal all over him. A deep moan leaves his lips as your hands finally touch him, his head falling completely on the pillow.
“Oh,” he growls.
Slowly, you start pumping him, taking your time, your hand gliding up and down his length. A trail of groans leaves his lips while you pump him nice and slow, giving him a dreamy handjob. Every time your hand reaches the base, Jungkook shivers, loving deeply how you’re pleasing him.
Your boyfriend is a bit surprised by the fact that you’re doing this handjob quite amazingly. Sometimes, with your reactions when it comes to sex, he forgets that you had exes so for sure you have some experience. Maybe not a lot but it’s still something. And now, he’s realizing that you perfectly know how to do things.
On your side, you want to give him more. You know your hand is just not enough, he needs more to come undone. So you dip down to kiss the head of his cock, his eyes instantly opening as this is unexpected. You lick his tip, his precum coating your wet muscle before you wrap your mouth entirely around his cock, sinking down fully on his length.
“Damn, yn,” he groans, loving the warmth of your mouth around him. He swears that he’s about to fall apart, covering your mouth with his cum.
Your eyes look up to meet with his. The moment they lock ⏤ both your eyes completely filled with lust ⏤ he looks away, too scared to burst right there. As much as he’d love to fill your pretty mouth with his seed, he doesn’t want to come right now. There’s still so much to be done.
“Love,” he says while his hand moves down to your hair, grabbing it before pulling your head a little. “I don’t want to come right now.”
Your lips leave his length, letting it slap against his lower abdomen before you crawl up his body to kiss him again languidly. Jungkook can taste his salty precum on your lips and he adores it. Damn, he loves everything about this moment with you.
“Do you have a condom?” you whisper on his lips.
“Of course, angel,” he replies.
Well, he always has some condoms in his bedroom as well as in his wallet. He’s always prepared in case anything like this happens. Even if he adores you, there’s no way that he’s doing it without protection. Your health is more important than anything else and also, it’s way too soon to take the risk of having a baby.
While he stands up to grab a condom in a drawer of the nightstand, you lay on your back, your eyes looking up at the ceiling. Strangely, you feel extremely happy that you’re taking this step in your relationship. It’s creating a deeper connection between you. A very intimate bond. When Jungkook gets back on the bed with his condom in his hand, he bites his bottom lip.
“You’re so beautiful, love,” he whispers, scanning every part of your body. You’re even prettier than in his dream.
The man doesn’t waste any time ripping the plastic and putting the condom on his length. Honestly, you ignore what to do so you simply watch him. On his knees, he gets closer to your body and he slowly and delicately spreads your legs. For a brief moment, he gazes at your core, causing him to bite his lower lip. While holding his cock, he brushes it against your pussy to get you wetter. He wants you to be as wet as possible to be ready for him.
“Can I?” he asks.
It melts your heart that this man asks for your consent before going any further. Rare are the men who did it before. Once again, it proves to you that you found the right person.
When you nod, he slowly buries his thick cock inside your soaked core, stretching your velvety walls. His large hands find their way to your waist, caressing your soft skin while his doe eyes filled with lust look into yours. Both of you groan as he slowly pushes his long and thick cock inside you.
“So good,” you mumble as your eyes roll back.
You have to admit that it hurts a bit since it’s been a while since you last had sexual intercourse but the fact that he’s slowly filling you up to the brim helps. It gives time to your body to get used to this massive intrusion. But it feels so damn good to have him inside you. This is even better than in your wildest dreams. Jungkook leans closer, pushing his cock a bit deeper inside you and snatching a loud moan out of you.
“It feels so good, love,” his deep voice groans in your ear. “Even better than in my dreams.”
The fact that he has been dreaming about this too gets you wetter. In a way, it makes sense to you since you’ve had some heated exchanges. You kiss his shoulder before giving it a gentle bite.
“Oh, looks like the prude yn hides a wild side of her,” he teasingly says while pulling back a bit.
“Good girls are bad girls that haven’t been caught,” you sing, making reference to a band, 5 Seconds of Summer, that you love.
“Couldn’t agree more with that sentence,” your boyfriend adds as he keeps pushing back to only leave the tip of his cock inside you.
Brutally, he pushes his cock fully inside you, and a loud moan leaves your lips. For a little while, he doesn't move, hovering over you and watching you with delight. His eyes look down on your body. He’s surprised by how insanely perfect you are. Your body is for sure the prettiest one he has ever seen.
Unlike what everyone thinks, he’s not fond of skinny bodies. He loves curves and imperfect bodies because they show life. They show that their owners eat to live, and your curves drive him crazy. He could come just by looking at your ass.
His lips meet yours for a sloppy kiss before going down to your neck, leaving another trail of kisses on your skin. Needless to say, it makes you moan a bit more. Once he has tortured you enough, his eyes get lost in your body again, groaning as he watches himself buried deep inside you.
“Uff, you’re driving me crazy, my love.”
You close your eyes, completely enjoying having him fully inside you. You’re completely euphoric at the feeling of him stretching your walls. Once he sees that you’re ready to take more, he pulls back brutally before slamming himself back into you. The bed under you squeaks, the headboard hitting the wall just behind you. The slick sound of your pussy soaking his cock as well as your moans quickly fill the room.
“Jungkook,” you gasp while he thrusts into you.
This all causes sparks of pleasure to shoot throughout your body, your arousal dripping from your core and creaming his cock. Jungkook smirks as he notices the sticky mess you’re causing. You grip the sheets as hard as possible to steady yourself from Jungkook’s hard thrusts.
Neither of you can believe that this is happening tonight. In some way, you’re grateful that his neighbors started having some nasty time. Without them, probably nothing would have happened. You can’t even believe you were so nervous and embarrassed minutes ago. And now, you’re making love with the man you love.
“You’re so wet, love,” he hisses before biting his lower lip. His hands press harder into your skin when he feels your walls tighten around him. “And making such a mess on my cock.”
Every time he pushes his hips back, he watches with delight the way his cock is completely covered with your arousal. Nothing drives him crazier than seeing this, it is as if your bodies were made for each other.
Jungkook bends down, pressing a sloppy kiss on your lips while his thrusts slow down. A desperate whine gushes from you, a sound that he proudly swallows. His hands go up to your body, grabbing your breasts and squeezing them to make you moan with desire before his mouth goes down on your body to play with your nipples.
“It feels so good,” you whine.
His thrusts are slow and harsh again, and his teeth on your nipples are just too much for you. Gradually, Jungkook begins to thrust hard into you again, and you moan at the feeling of his brutal thrust. Your walls suck his cock as he slams his hips into you with more force. Everything that your boyfriend does pushes you closer and closer to the edge.
His eyes look up at you, contorting with pleasure as it slowly builds within you. Little moans keep flooding out of your mouth, and Jungkook is adoring to hear you moan. His hands can feel the way your body quivers with each thrust. The way he’s torturing your body is only making you lose yourself further. He just knows how to pleasure you perfectly like he became a master of your body in just some minutes.
“Your cunt is clenching so hard, love,” he says when he feels the warmth of your walls wrapping tighter around him
As you glance up at him, you can’t help but find him extremely attractive. His eyes stare down at you with passion and lust as his tongue licks his lower lips. He simply can’t believe that this is really happening. He can’t believe that he’s making love to the prettiest woman in the world. He leans forward once more to press another sloppy kiss on your lips. He loves to feel your lips on his, even if the kiss is a disaster.
“Oh my god,” you barely manage to say while you have a first orgasm. Your body shakes crazily, and Jungkook is happier than ever to see you being overwhelmed by pleasure.
The vision of you coming undone makes his cock twitch inside of you. However, he wants you to experience more orgasms. There’s no way that he’s going to end this moment without having you come more than once. One of his hands slowly goes down on your body, passing your stomach, and landing on your throbbing clit. His fingers start to rub your sensitive spot.
To be honest, this action only makes your orgasm more intense and longer. Your arousal completely covers his cock and your walls squeeze him over and over again. This is heaven for him. He could stop right now and he’d be more than happy because he gave you a lot of pleasure.
He speeds up the pace of his hips slamming into you. The coil in his lower stomach tightens inside of him, and it completely clouds his thoughts. His increase in pace causes you to have a second orgasm in a matter of seconds.
Breathy whines escape his pretty lips as he looks down at the mess you’re making on his cock. A desperate moan leaves his mouth when his orgasm hits him hard. His eyes roll back with pleasure as his body tenses up and releases his load inside the condom. He collapses next to you, both of your bodies covered in sweat after this intense sex session. Your heavy breathing is now the only thing that can be heard in your bedroom.
Jungkook throws the condom on the floor before laying again next to you on his bed. His eyes look at you with marvel. You’re so damn wonderful.
“Uff, love! This was something,” he says as he presses a gentle kiss on your cheek. “Did you enjoy it?”
Even though you had 2 orgasms one after the other, he still wants to make sure that you loved this steamy session.
“Of course!” you directly answer.
Your lips find his for a little kiss.
“I’m glad to hear that!” a bright smile appears on his face.
As you look at your delighted boyfriend, you feel a wave of happiness wash over you. Yep, this is what you’ve been desiring for years. Being this in love and sharing such a wonderful intimate moment with the person you love is what you’ve been looking for.
Right there and then, you comprehend what you were made for. You were made to fall in love with Jungkook.
#bts#bts imagine#bts imagines#jeon jungkook#jungkook#jungkook imagine#bts fluff#jungkook fluff#bts smut#jungkook smut#bts x reader#jungkook x reader#what was i made for#spideyjimin
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Gemini New Moon PAC Spread
Hey Guys! This one is pretty long, but I felt inspired to do it as I would one of my paid readings because I felt really connected with this moon today and I hope you guys find that at least one of these messages resonates with you! Now, let's get started★
Pile 1
Focus: 5 of pentacles (The Hierophant)
After this new moon, those in pile 1 need to focus on balance. In our capitalistic society, money and resources are the key to our day-to-day survival, but what about your inner world? Your ties to the things outside of our mortal realm? Your growth will be found in the coexistence of the logical and mystical sides of life.
New Beginnings: The Emperor (Page of Swords)
As new moons usher in new beginnings, you will gain more discipline, stability, and focus with a wave of curiosity, inspiration, and chattiness! If you’ve been wanting to be more assertive, this will come easily to you now.
How to Communicate: *The Gate (Justice)
As we communicate during this time, remember to be pragmatic and speak the way you’d like to be spoken to. "You can attract more bees with honey than vinegar", and it’s important to remind yourself that it isn’t always what you say, it’s how you say it.
Strengths: The Devil (10 of Cups)
In following this path, you must find strength in both the light and the dark. We all have wounds to heal and temptations that call to us, and while we must actively work to heal them, we cannot ignore the beautiful and joyous parts of life. Remain self-aware and honest with yourself, but don’t deprive yourself of embracing and showing appreciation for what and who you have.
Release: 8 of cups (The Fool)
To gain something new, we must also let go, and this lunar cycle says to walk away from people, habits, and thoughts that no longer serve you. It may be scary to leave what’s familiar, but the Fool says to jump into this newness bravely. What you will get now is far better than what you had before.
Theme: Luck is on your side (New moon in Sagittarius)
If you’ve been having a low spell, life is about to have an energetic restart! Take this time to be adventurous and connect with others, especially by sharing your ideas.
Manifestation: Know you are loved (New moon in Libra)
“Love makes my world go round”
Love, whether platonic or romantic, will start pouring in at this time. New relationship cycles (friendship, professional, and even romantic) as well as new opportunities will be available to you now.
Angel Guidance: #39 Perseverance (Joy Guide)
“Don’t give up”
Do not fret if things have taken longer than you thought, as your guides are urging you to keep going. Though this is a tougher process, take this time to learn as you go and keep your eye on the prize because your hard work will come to fruition.
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Pile 2
Focus: Temperance (7 of Swords)
For group 2, this lunar cycle wants you to stay calm and balanced (both mentally and emotionally) as you go after what you want while also being aware of potential deception. Someone or something might be subtly getting in your way either personally or professionally, but don’t allow this to shake you! A challenge will not take you off your path, because what is for you cannot be taken.
New Beginnings: The Hermit (inverted 6 of cups)
As you move towards this, your new beginning may start with you taking more time to be alone and to reflect. If you have been carrying pain from the past or have felt unable to move forward, this will be your moment to finally, truly let go and focus on your future! You see the light now, and it’s starting from within.
How to Communicate: Knight of Pentacles (The Lovers)
Because this could potentially be an emotional time, when communicating, you must try to ground your passion and dreams with practical considerations that others can more easily understand and picture along with you. This will help you feel more understood and can take your ideas from the imagination to the real world.
Strengths: The Chariot (7 of Pentacles)
A strength you can lean on currently is you self-discipline, ambition, and focus as well as your ability to plan and manifest! Your combination of patience and action makes you an unstoppable force and your success is inevitable.
Release: 4 of Pentacles (9 of cups)
Finally, to embrace all that’s coming to you, you must release your need for control and anything that has been weighing you down. By embracing optimism and your right to prosperity, abundance will come to you in droves.
Theme: Nothing Will Come of This (Void of Course Moon)
“I trust in my highest good”
If you’ve been worried about or hoping for something, that thing isn’t in the Universe’s plan for you. While this might be a positive or negative for some of you, this is your chance to pivot towards something in true alignment.
Manifestation: Take Inspired Action (Full moon in Virgo)
“I forgive myself for everything, I am doing my best”
In line with the Knight of Pentacles and The Lovers, the seeds of your manifestations must be watered with action. Be proactive and intentional as you move forward to make your dreams a reality.
Angel Guidance: #26 Balance (Teacher Guide)
“Give fairly and with unconditional love, and all will turn out well”
Take this time to click in with your relationships. Are you taking too much on from those in your life? Are you communicating your needs or waiting for others to guess and feel hurt? Do others feel like they aren’t getting enough from you? Our relationships need to be an equal space of give and take, and so this time calls to regain that balance.
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Pile 3
Focus: 2 of wands (10 of pentacles)
For those in group 3, your intentions should be centered on your goals, as they will lead you to prosperity, growth, and abundance! This is a time when you can feel confident in taking calculated risks for them as well, as there is financial stability and a solid foundation beneath you. If you’ve been torn about which path to take, this is your sign to choose the path your heart can’t let go of.
New Beginnings: The Tower (The High Priestess)
As you go towards this new beginning, you will experience a significant transformation, one that might feel like a complete upheaval of everything you’ve known and built up until now. While this may sound scary, you will feel that something needs to change, and it’s important to trust your intuition and ability to face it head-on.
How to Communicate: 8 of pentacles (10 of wands)
Because this will be an intense time for you, please communicate your needs to those around you. You may need more support and assistance, those that care will want to rally around and lift you up as you trudge along.
Strengths:6 of swords (5 of wands)
A strength you can embrace right now is the freedom to let go. The feelings from your past don’t have to remain in this present time. The choice to embrace peace and release resentment, hurt, and negativity is empowering, and this new beginning deserves a you who wants to be renewed.
Release: King of Cups (inverted Knight of Cups)
To fully move forward, replace moodiness with a balance between your mind and heart. Things can hurt, but they don’t have to consume you. “Logic” isn’t more valid than healthy emotional expression. Bring your emotional and realistic sides together and watch how your viewpoint evolves.
Theme: Surrender to the Divine (Full Moon)
“I am getting the answers I need”
Life is coming to a head, a climax, and it is important to keep a cool head as it unfolds. The odds are in you favor, but it is important to tune into yourself and your feelings to see what they are trying to tell you. Trust in your intuition and your guides.
Manifestation: See the bigger picture (Full Moon in Sagittarius)
“I know that I am blessed and I love my life within that knowing”
In this time, you have to find a balance and acceptance of where you are vs where you want to be. Learn and research as you head towards this new path, and if conflict appears, learn what needs to be said instead of saying too much. Be the bigger and more patient person at this time.
Angel Guidance: #44 Limitation (Nature Guide)
“Listen and learn from others, they make it easier for you”
As this is a new path, shed your perchance for pride, as it is of no use to you. Find those who are more knowledgeable and versed than you, ask questions, watch, and learn. You can go so much further with far less struggle when you are open to being unsure.
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Pile 4
Focus: 3 of Swords (Knight of swords)
If you are recovering from heartbreak or dealing with heavy emotions like loneliness or depression, this lunar cycle is calling for you to pick yourself up and make big changes! Seize the day, put yourself back out there, open up, and be honest about how you feel, or simply be brave and do one thing that scares you. This low point isn't meant for you and it’s time to crawl towards the light.
New Beginnings: The Magician (Ace of Pentacles)
Your new beginning is realizing that you are the key to the life you desire. The Magician manifests and takes action while the ace of pentacles brews financial abundance and material gains. If you start taking actions now, no matter how small, that align with the things you’ve been wishing for, this is a time that will foster personal, material, or financial success. Dream big and go for it! All you have to do is take the first step.
How to Communicate: Queen of Swords (King of Pentacles)
When communicating, it’s important to be logical, direct, and clear-headed. As we express ourselves, try to balance your emotions and logic so that you can be heard while you express your true feelings. Hold your head high and be honest, even if it’s frightening. So much strength comes from speaking our truth.
Strengths: 9 of pentacles (the Empress)
A strength you should connect with (no matter your gender) is your divine feminine energy. Tapping into this aspect of ourselves allows us to connect with the earth and the divine, promoting self-understanding and our access to manifestation. The 9 of pentacles signals abundance and by combining these two, you can create a beautiful life and find a state of contentment.
Release: The Star (9 of swords)
To embrace all that is coming to you, lay down your fear, anxiety, and depression, and allow yourself to hope and dream. The life you want isn’t a silly pipe dream. You have access to pleasure and joy just like anyone else, and you must release the belief that you are worth anything less.
Theme: A Win-Win Outcome is Forecast (Full moon in Libra)
“Let go of that which is falling away…”
A relationship in your life is changing, whether deepening or coming to a close. It is important to remember that some things are for a reason while others are for a season, and no matter which way it’s headed, allow it to run its intended course. No matter what happens, it’s for your highest good no matter how it feels.
Manifestation: Go Deeper (New moon in Scorpio)
“Life goes in cycles and my life is now regenerating”
You’re stepping back into your power after something that cut deep, and it’s time to go into it fully. Dig deep into what happened and see the whole picture. Experience things fully right now instead of accepting the surface level.
Angel Guidance: #36 Abundance (Joy Guide)
“Fill your heart with gratitude and appreciation for the good things in life right now. More blessed abundance is on the way”
The universe is showering you with gifts and blessings that are going unnoticed by you, and so your guides are now bringing them to your attention. Each morning, ask for something good to happen and write down what showed up at the end of the day. The universe gives back what you put out, and gratitude begets even more love and blessings!
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And that is the end of this Pick-A-Card Reading. Thank you so much if you took the time to participate, comment in the notes what pile you pick, and please check out my shop or if you're feeling generous, you can support me on my ko-fi as well. Until next time, be sweet to yourselves!
#Gemini new moon#new moon in gemini#new moon tarot spread#tarot pick a pile#tarot pick a card#pick a card#pick a pile#pac reading
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Oxygen is all we need | Hoshina Soshiro
Part 5 of “Certainly Yours”
pairing: Hoshina Soshiro x fem!reader
summary: you rarely see soshiro be breathless on the battlefield. And the one time you did, it was coerced by a sentient Numbers Weapon you had created.
warnings: NSFW explicit scenes with plot, mentions of sexual m/f activity, Fingering/handjob with Combat Suit on, Semi-public fingering/handjob, Hoshina being a little feral, slight description of gore for dissecting combat suits, mentions of injury for Hoshina, SPOILERS for Kn8 manga
wc: 6,573
–
note: Please tell me if I missed any warnings. There's kind of a lot. NSFW part was originally gonna be some soft lovemaking type of writing. But I figured I could save that for a future part. Went too feral on his Number 10 Combat Suit from reading the manga lmao. This is not proofread
–
Soshiro Hoshina, was an enigma.
He had always been that way to his peers. He was no different to you, now that you had been privy to see a small part of his life that people have yet to pry open.
Despite the laid-back persona he'd exemplify, you were always aware of the disciplined and hard working nature he hid beneath the surface of his jokes and smiles. And his everyday life only showed a fraction of this side of him that no one seems to pay attention to.
All except you of course, who had been keeping an eye on him well before the two of you started dating.
It started in the little actions he'd take. From the early hours of the morning, he'd wake up on the dot just to grab a cup of coffee before the day had turned busy. The privacy of his office had been made neat, filled with finished paperwork that he'd arranged the day before. Leaving room for him to swing his sword in the training rooms until the cool nights of the summer where even cicadas started sleeping early.
His comrades? Fast asleep in their bunks. Unaware that the Vice Captain was sweating. Recreating the battles he's faced in the wake of an emergency. Where Tachikawa's base had been left in his hands.
Every failure, every mistake, every mishaps he had allowed. He had made sure to embed the consequences deep into his body. Making a vow to never let anyone catch him off guard. Kaiju or humans included. And although it was a rare sight. Even you, his lover. Had not seen him work himself breathless.
Not once had you caught him wheezing to catch up. His hard work, hidden under people's watch.
His efforts were definitely there. But no one had been able to see his training first hand. Leaving people to chalk it up to simply talent, or the bloodline of his ancestry as a family of Kaiju Slayers.
But his hard work, though hidden. Had not all been in vain. As he of all people knew deep down that he worked–no, strived to become better. To prove his existence in the field. And you, had strived to make it happen in the wake of Numbers Weapon 10's existence.
It had been a few days since you and a team of technicians had decidedly worked on converting Kaiju no. 10 as a plausible weapon. A suit befitting for your lover to wear.
The first time you had seen its deformed body, trapped in a tank for containment purposes. It briefly made eye contact with you. As if it knew something deep within you that you hadn't known yet. Its one eye continuously stares at you, in a strange admiration. Similar to Soshiro's.
Surprisingly, anytime the tank had been registered open. It had not struggled to be converted into a weapon. The plates of armor, although mangled. Had not shown any signs of a struggle. And each incision you'd make to form the modified Combat Suit, was simple. Unrestrained, even. To the point that it would obediently let you slice it as you wished. To shape and mold it to the combat suit you wished to make.
Hell, it even went as far as to talk to you when you were removing the last bits of his headpieces. Leaving the core and its surrounding muscle fibers intact. Beating, breathing like a heart. “So this is the one huh?” You heard it's gurgled laughter. As if you had not been cutting it open for hours by now.
Soshiro and a few soldiers were stationed right behind you. A team of other technicians and scientists assisting your movements to place the armor pieces together. The tension in the room was heavy, weapons readied in the case of an emergency. But like always, the Kaiju had all but stayed still. Obedient with a few laughs here and there for the hell of it.
“Even his woman is a weapons creator. I really did make the right decision to join forces with you, Swordsman.” Kaiju no. 10 had spoken. And you look over to Soshiro wearily for a moment.
“Shut yer’ trap. By the time she's done with you, you're as good as obedient to me.” You had seen the way Soshiro had glared at the dismembered monster. And the way his voice had lowered an octave. It made you momentarily forget that you were in a room full of people.
You purse your lips. Trying not to focus on his smooth voice. Not when you were potentially busy dealing with a Kaiju that had not been fully weaponized yet.
You had all but shook your head. No, get your mind out of the gutter.
“Stop provoking each other.” You spoke, pulling away the veins connected to the hardened plating.
Eventually attaching the last bit of the Kaiju’s parts onto the mold of the suit. Its shape fully formed right besides its old carcass that had been discarded afterwards. The Combat Suit took ages to cut apart. With its armor far too hard to penetrate with just a scalpel alone. But somehow you and your team had managed.
In fact the Tail in particular had beautifully connected to the lower end of its spine and had finally completed the look.
Number 10 had not made a single sound as it had likely died from being weaponized. Like the rest of the Kaiju before it.
Or at least..that's what was supposed to happen. “Wear me, swordsman. I want to fight something already.”
Huh?
“It's still speaking?” You had felt yourself be pulled back. Soshiro had wasted no time getting in front of you. Hand already on the hilt of his swords, as the weaponized Kaiju stared straight back at him.
“Why is it still sentient?” He had glanced back at you. And you can see the faint traces of his still fresh bandages wrap around his lower neck, lower down his jacket.
“I don't know.” You had spoken truthfully. “We've never had to weaponize a sentient Kaiju before.” You had replied. The rest of the technicians also backed behind some of the soldiers who already had their guns raised. Pointed straight at the tank that held the completed weapon.
“Is it safe to use?” He asked.
“It should be. The rest of his core can't sync up to his body anymore, so I doubt he can kill anyone right now.” You explained.
Watching Soshiro wearily stand straighter. This time, raising his hand so that the rest of the soldiers would lower their aimed weapons. And they did just that. With the weaponized Kaiju not reacting at all in fact.
“Well this isn't good..” He whispered. Skeptical about letting you get any closer to it as the Kaiju inside of it had laughed.
“It..probably needs a bit more time to adjust in the combat suit. For now, let me work on it alone.” You had suggested, seeing the skepticism of the other technicians. You had no doubt that no one wanted to work on the weapon, especially since it was still very sentient. Now in possession of solidified upgrades to strengthen its use in combat. If it was still able to formulate thoughts despite having been completely mangled as a weapon. Kaiju no. 10, now had the means to breach the combat suit's limitations. In the case it did lose control.
Meaning, you were the only one who'd be willing to work through the weapon’s new kinks and pieces. To stop it from getting wild.
It had obediently let you work on it the first time. You were positive that it wouldn't be a problem now.
“...Are you sure about this? I don't mind if it doesn't become usable ya’ know? It ain't worth risking your life like this.” He had briefly brushed a thumb to your cheek. Forgetting that there had been an audience of officers just behind them.
Though it seems Soshiro did not care much about that. More worried for your safety, in all of this.
“Calm down swordsman. I'm not interested in killing the woman who's bound to make me stronger. It'll keep things..Interesting.”
Soshiro had looked over to the tube that held the weaponized Kaiju in place. It didn't even register in your eyes when he had unsheathed one of his blades. Pointing the tip directly at the cross section on the combat suit's chest. Where the eye had been placed. “Keep talking and I'll slice you to ribbons ya’ little-”
You had crossed your way over to lower his weapon. A gentle hand on his bandaged chest that had been healing for a few days now. “I will be just fine.” You assured him.
“You heard him, he won't hurt me.”
“And ya’ sure about that?” He had a strained smile on his lips. Bordering frustration as he had not once moved his gaze from the suit.
“If he planned to, he would've attacked me way before I could dice him up to make an armor out of him.” You had given him a small smile. Despite your own skepticism.
“I'll be fine..” You reassured him again. And silence took momentary peace in the room.
Soshiro had a minute to take in your words. His hardened gaze softened momentarily as it met your pretty face. And as usual, you did not falter when you spoke those words. Strong-willed and unafraid you were. As self-confident as ever it seems. He couldn't help but let out a sigh. Placing his blade back on his hip. “Fine. But, I'm staying here with you, so-
-Get him ready, and I'll be the one to break him in for ya.”
–
It had been a few days since that incident. The weaponized Kaiju had been transferred to a private facility. Where you had the privacy and materials needed to work in top condition. Surprisingly, Soshiro had done well on his promise. Leaving the Tachikawa base to stay with you on a daily basis in the case that Kaiju no. 10 would attack. Likely having already explained the situation to Captain Ashiro long before you had worked on adjusting the suit’s flaws.
Soshiro was usually a patient man. But being a Vice Captain of an entire division, you did not want to waste a second of his packed schedule when he was already so busy with his other responsibilities. So you wasted no time as you continued to limit the weapon's control over its armored body. Thoroughly eradicating its ability to disobey order from its wearer, but to no avail.
So far, all you had been able to do was to limit the monster's movements, down to a singular point which was its tail. The limb seems to have a mind of its own, and it did not bother to listen to any of you nor Soshiro's commands. Demanding that they let him battle a Kaiju to test out his new uses. And the moment Soshiro had declined. You weren't spared from Kaiju no. 10's complaining either. Constantly yapping in excitement for a battle that had yet to start.
Although it wasn't nearly as controlled as you liked, command had apparently dubbed the weaponized combat suit as usable enough for Soshiro to handle. And despite the dangers of its early prototypes, they were both given the permission to do a test run within the indoor training grounds provided near the labs.
Which is what leads you today, alone once more in an enforced room no less. Watching Soshiro step into the small pod, where wires had connected the Weaponized combat suit onto his body.
And from the control panel right next to it. You are able to grasp a few readings of his vitals. All seemed stable thus far.
“Are you sure about this? Wouldn't it be safer to have soldiers on standby for the simulation?” You had stood up from your chair. Brows scrunched the moment the combat suit had zipped closed.
Your eyes had glanced over at the way his suit had all but molded to his form. The armor plating had fit distinctly to his chest. And his arms and legs had no trouble adjusting to the heavy heat of Kaiju no. 10's muscle fibers. The ones you had distinctly measured to fit his body. A combat suit only made for him in mind.
And he looked damn good in it. You thought.
“I’ll be fine sweetheart. I'm confident ya’ made it safe enough for me to wear it.” He had spoken through the standard respiratory mask he wore. And you could hear each audible breath he took in. Calm and steady unlike the buzz in your head that kept glancing down your lover's body.
You had half a mind to look away. To not focus on the ridges of his plated hands. The hardened steel that covered his abs. And that damn tail on his back, that traced the ridges of his neck and spine.
Fuck.
Here he was, trusting his safety to the very core of your days worth of handiwork. And all you were thinking about is how you wished his hands were unbuttoning your blouse. And worse.
“Sure.” You stutter.
“Let's just hope it syncs up with your brain waves..” You had distracted yourself. Forcing your eyes to face the screen instead of his body. And you could see the way Soshiro had visibly slackened when he had noticed the way you had turned away from him. And this abruptness had made him frown a little. Thinking that the suit might've scared you to bits. A far cry to the actual thoughts swimming in your mind.
“Your woman here is quite talented in strengthening me. I see why you can't ignore her.” Kaiju no. 10 spoke to him. A chuckle sounding out from the small intercom he wore. Luckily you were too distracted to hear its comment.
“You show hesitation. If I had been the one in control, I'd show no restraint to your woman and take her as mine..” Soshiro had heard it's voice in his head. And flashes of their synced brain had shown him a brief future where you had pinned her under his arms. His clawed hands gripping at the plush of your thighs, and he'd carefully start to taste the droplets of slick that would caress the skin nearest your-
He shook his head.
“Quit yappin’ or I'll have you decommissioned before you can ever become useful to me.” He had stepped forward. The wires disconnecting from the skeletal structure of his armored back. And Soshiro could feel the weight of the weaponized combat suit completely engulf his body. That tail of his, which previously belonged to Kaiju no. 10. Was swinging around haphazardly, out of his control. Like it had been excited from being worn. After days of laying dormant in the table to be operated on.
But if Soshiro had to guess. It was likely this excitement had stemmed from the thoughts the Kaiju had dug up from the very back of his brain. Thoughts that he had kept for himself in the darkness of his room where no one would disturb him.
And a monster having access to that?
Shit.
He might not hear the end of it.
If only he hadn't put that image inside his head. Who would've thought that syncing his brain waves with a sentient combat suit would have him thinking sinful thoughts. In broad daylight where the suit could monitor every muscle and bone in his body.
He had heard stories that this was a common side effect that the Weapon Numbers had. The non-sentient ones had at least some form of memory of their previous users. The difference was, number 10 was more talkative. Straightforward even. It had just been his luck that the monster somehow managed to resurface a few of his thoughts that he buried deep within the very corners of his brain.
And here he was, in a situation that made his body unbelievably breathless and hot. In front of you.
“Vital signs are okay..but your thermal readings are higher than normal.” You had spoken. Shaking away the tingling sensation you felt from seeing him in the Combat suit. More worried about his well being this time.
But Soshiro couldn't seem to look you in the eye. A strained smile seems to have overcome his features as he felt the heat travel from the pit of his stomach, all the way down to the valley between his legs.
Shit.
Now was not the right time for him to harden.
“Is everything alright?” You had walked up much closer to him. And you can see the telltale signs of breathlessness in him. Odd considering he had never been caught breathless like this. And the moment you had come closer in proximity, he took a singular step back.
Which didn't go unnoticed by you.
In actuality, he was lucky that your eyes had been focused on his face. His pants were loose, no different from the standard uniform all officers would wear. But if you looked hard enough, you might be able to see the signs of his printed heat. Carved on the fabric nearest his thighs.
“Just peachy.” He answers with a chuckle.
“He's just..a little noisy that's all.” He had cleared his throat. Feeling the familiar sensation of his erection start to throb. And another wave of uncontrollable thoughts had washed over his mind. Likely a result from No. 10 sharing its desires to him. No, rather than sharing its thoughts, it most likely resurfaced his feelings that he kept hidden from his lover.
It hadn't been that long since you had officially gotten together. Save one date or two during the rare occasion that they'd both be off-duty. But never had they been intimate in that way before. Hell, he didn't even know if you were a virgin or not.
He flinches. Suddenly feeling the shockwave of heat skim across his armored body, making him falter from his movements to back away. And he falls forward. A hand on your shoulder to steady himself before he could completely stumble.
“Soshiro!” He had heard you speak. The palm of your hand against his chest. But his mind was dazed. His name on your lips had made his pants feel awfully tight. And his ears had warmed slightly, removing the respiratory mask on his face so that he could breathe more evenly. “M’ fine..”
His tone had not been convincing. And you could feel the quick breaths he'd take to make up for the lack of oxygen that took up all the heat in his body.
Damn you, Kaiju no. 10. Soshiro could practically hear it chuckling.
“Stop lying..” You had spoken exasperatedly. “Is he talking to you right now?”
You wondered. Finding it odd that Soshiro, who was normally talkative and easy-going, had all but quieted down. Your question remained unanswered as he was too busy hearing the words of his Weaponized suit in his head. “Your hesitation is cowardly. Move. Or I will, swordsman.”
And he purses his lips at the thought. His head leaning against your shoulder. His hand moving to palm the small of your back to pull you much closer than before. “Don't touch her.”
His growl had made you flinch. And you can see the way his fangs had showed up from the way his teeth had gritted. The low baritone of his voice had been unlike him. Heavy and out of breath. But somehow the sound shot straight down your core. And it makes you gulp.
The reply had clearly not been for you. And such actions would provoke him enough to pull you close it seems, that it made you frown in his strange state. Whether he was in pain or frustrated from the suit, you wouldn't know. Not when he had buried his face on the crook of your neck where the scent of your subtle cologne had wafted.
“Soshiro..” you called softly. Running your hands through his dark hair.
To your better judgment, you had led him to lean against the control panel. Gently letting his back hit the surface of the table. And you had slowly unwrapped yourself from him. Reaching to the keyboard which will let you issue a command to get him ejected from the Weaponized Kaiju.
But before you could reach to press a few buttons, he pulled you back. Strong hands wrapping at the softness of your waist. Gingerly pulling you back. Your spine up against his chest where you could feel the sturdiness of his suit against you. “Soshiro, just hold still I need to-”
You flinched. Stopping your sentence midway.
The sudden feeling of his teeth sinking into the nape of your neck had overridden whatever words that wanted to leave your mouth. All but too focused on the feeling of his teeth taking a bite from the skin of your neck.
Surprisingly, his bite had not been enough to draw blood. It was softer than you anticipated. One that oddly made you yelp in a pleased manner. And just as quickly as he marked the area, he moved to lick away at the reddened state your skin had been left in. Which you had not expected, placing a hefty hand over your lips to strangle any noises your throat attempted to make.
“Soshiro, wait.” You had flinched again.
Feeling his lips trail kisses southward. Down from the nape, all the way over to the pulse point on your neck. He had hummed, giving your skin a few kitten licks. Before he immediately sank his teeth into your skin once more.
Leaving red marks that
left you jolting against him. Your head leaning back to press closer against him. Likely to let his teeth sink deeper, if he wanted to. But Soshiro, even in this state, remained disciplined. Still as he didn't let the bite injure you. His only intent was to leave ravishing red marks on you that proved to him that you were his. A warning to the Kaiju that threatened his place beside you.
“Mm..sorry dear. You're jus’ way too fuckin sweet.” He mumbled against your skin. His tail, which had previously been quiet, had now wrapped itself loosely against your leg. As if trying to pull you closer to Soshiro's body. The same sentiment seemed to have been shared between Kaiju No. 10 and Soshiro. And you wonder if this had been the result of their minds syncing up.
“We're still at work..” You had whispered out. Breathing heavily as he licked and sucked on your neck. Leaving purple marks on the wake of his careful lips. Even in this state he had been meticulous. Leaving careful bites that only ever felt ticklish and pleasant.
He had not been rough at all in the way he had so easily painted your skin with his masterpieces.
“I know..I just..” He breathes heavily against your jaw and ear. Taking your free hand to drag it behind you. Guiding your touch to trace the ridges of his abdomen. Reaching all the way down to the softness of his pants. And you feel the cold zipper of his clothes graze against your fingertips.
But more importantly. Something warmer had touched her fingertips. And you could feel the shape of his length under the confines of fabric. Painfully hard and tight from his size. And you feel your breath hitch the moment you had realized why exactly he had been heating up so abnormally since he wore the suit. And you hear his groan muffled by his bite as he guides your warm palm to press harder against his crotch.
“Jus’ tell me to stop.” He whispered.
“Tell me you don't want this..” He breathlessly groaned. Suddenly finding relief that your hand had cupped the very place he had been craving friction from. The texture of his pants made him shiver as you had delicately traced the imprint of his hard-on. As if all but admiring the large warmth in your hand.
And although you couldn't face him right now, you spoke softly. Immediately in your reply. “I want this..”
Soshiro had taken a moment to glance at you. And he sees the redness of your cheeks bloom against your skin. Chest heaving just as much as he was when he had started thinking about the pleasure in his body.
Without warning, you suddenly press your hand further onto his erection. Moving it up and down, feeling the way the fabric rolled against your palm and the sticky mess he made underneath the fabric.
A hiss came from his mouth and Soshiro couldn't help but pull you closer by the hips. His enhanced hands, one that had been strengthened by the weaponized suit, would likely leave bruises on the handle of your hips. If he were careless that is.
So he faltered, moving his hand away from your body. Instead, deciding to prop itself up on the surface of the control panel they leaned on. The other hand, which had still made contact with your hips. Had caressed you hungrily upon your own touches. Holding back his urges to grab you too tightly lest he breaks your body from his strength alone. An idea likely from Kaiju no. 10 who had oddly quieted down. Whether it too can feel the effects you have on him was a mystery to him. One of which he had greedily just decided to ignore for the time being.
He'll save the lectures for later.
“Fuck-” He had sighed out. Feeling your fingers start palming him. Rubbing his crotch vigorously. Enough to cause him to squirm in place. His eyes had momentarily opened. Squinting around for any cameras or recording devices hidden in the training room. Luckily, there was conveniently none. Likely a result of keeping Weapons 10 a secret in the case they get infiltrated by a Kaiju.
Not that it was a problem for him. He'd wipe any footage he finds later. Anyways. And everyone would be none the wiser.
His focus had solely fixated on the way your fingertips felt upon his crotch. His hips have grown desperate. Moving to grind against your hand to get more friction out of you. But to no avail, the fabric was in the way. And right now, his only thought was that right now had been the worst time for the both of you to do this.
He had it all planned out too.
He'd take you out on a date on his off-duty. Make you wear a pretty sundress that he could easily peel off. And focus on your pleasure for the rest of the night should he be allowed to do so.
But this had been too different from his plans. Far too risky and sudden for his liking. His pleasure had been amped, and he had felt the careful touches you'd do in order to please him. Touch and palm his dick until it was beyond the point of arousal. Make him spill an early load in the confines of a training room no less.
But he'll be damned if he doesn't please you too.
“Ngh..You too sweetheart..” He groaned. “Let me make you feel good too.” He whispered, trying to regain a sense of control when his crotch had surely been sticky and wet from all the precum that damped his own boxers.
The hand that had hesitated in gripping your hip had slid forward to your stomach. His fingers tracing down the crumpled blouse that had tucked into the standardized pencil skirt that you had worn. And time and time again, it had not failed to grab his attention in each waking moment you decided to wear the damn thing.
The way it had hugged your figure, where he'd sneak a glance at the curves of your stomach and hips. His thoughts couldn't help but darken, admiring the way you had always managed to capture his attention. Unwarranted and without warning.
He didn't hesitate to pull your skirt up. Trailing the fabric directly above your navel until it revealed the pretty underwear you wore. And his textured fingertips traced his name on the waistband of the fabric. Playing with the mere shudders you'd make upon his touches. Your hands, which had busied themselves by touching Soshiro’s crotch, had stilled for a moment. Giving him a stellar opportunity to make up for lost time.
“Keep yer legs open for me sweetheart..” He had whispered out. Immediately running his hand through the valley of your clothed core. Feeling the dampness of the underwear, stain his coarse fingertips with your slick. Your inner thighs which had quivered against his light touches had glistened as a few droplets slipped past his fingers which made the skin of your thighs all the more tantalizing to watch.
He'd like to admire it more if he were being honest. He could tell number 10 had been all the same as his tail trailed up further onto your thighs. Gripping the skin to keep you in place. But right now, it wasn't the ideal setting for such a thing. Had this been a perfect world, he'd have taken you somewhere more comfortable. More private to please you. But right now, the suit isn't responding to any of his commands. And the best way to shut him and his damn urges up was to do this as quickly as possible. He'll have to make up for this at a later date. For now, all they needed was each other's touches.
“Soshiro..wait, I've never-” You threw your head back. Pausing when the hand that had moved to palm your cunt had suddenly invaded your space. His fingers had slipped past your waistband to quickly pinch at the sensitive bundle of nerves above your entrance. Your clit throbbing to meet his touches as you clenched against nothing in particular. Leaving Soshiro's throbbing erection behind as you had been too distracted to continue your movements. Pinching your tender clit had made Soshiro groan in response. Feeling just how wet you had gotten for him alone.
“This your first time?” He whispered. Kissing you squarely on the shoulders. Trying his best to calm your nerves at the new feeling of his hand touching the quivering spot between your legs. And he starts rubbing circles with his fingers. Pressing down on the nub of your clit which made you moan and buck your hips in response.
“Shh..S’okay. Let me take care of ya.” He breathed next to your ear. “I won't enter ya..just focus on the pleasure.” He sighed out. His fingers were already making quick work of your entrance which had not wasted any more time than he should have. Weary that anyone could walk in and see them doing other things that didn't involve number 10's prototype testing.
Immediately, he didn't hesitate to run his hands through your fleshy lips. Mixing the liquids of your slick to help satisfy the itch your heat had felt. And the noises you made when you spoke his name had all but proved to encourage his touches further. Stretching your cunt wide open to make way for his fingers.
And you had all but yelped the moment his movements had made quick and distinct touches to your cunt. Your entrance trying its damndest to swallow his fingers whole that had so easily helped build up the euphoric high your core started to feel. But to no avail, his fingers teased. Slipping past the entrance just to help you fit his fingers in much easier.
Despite the strain on his pants, his hand had expertly rubbed and felt your fleshy entrance. Squeezing the slick out of you as it had completely dampened his fingers and the underwear that had threatened to slip past your thighs.
The shaky moans you'd let out was followed up by a finger slowly prodding at your cunt's entrance and without warning his coarse gloved hands had invaded you without struggle. His finger easily makinh.it passed the slippery exterior he worked so hard to prep.“Nghh..Soshi..ro..feels good.”
“I know sweetheart. You're close right?” His own shaky breaths had replied back. His fingers suddenly pistoning in and out of your sopping wet core. Invading and reaching spots no one, not even you had reached before. And your head throws back against him. Hand immediately palming his clothed dick to encourage him further. The unfamiliar feeling of a string coiling around the pit of your stomach had formed. And it threatened to spill out from your cunt like a glass cup that had been too full.
“Mmm..let me touch you too.” You had managed to let out between sighs. Your legs are shivering as you feel your underwear slip down to pool against your ankles. Revealing the lewd scene of his fingers penetrating your cunt. You hadn't even realized he added a finger until he started moving it in a scissoring motion. And you had half a mind to give up on your endeavors to match his euphoria.
But you have always been quite a stubborn person. Even when you had carefully tiptoed around each other. You had been bold in your endeavors. And you were bolder now, more than ever.
“Shit- hold on a second..mmm..” Soshiro had felt the way your hand had reached to unzip his pants. And your palm had gradually encased his dick with the warmth of your fingers. Massaging his erection directly to feel the ridges and veins it naturally had. The tip of it a raging red that dripped pearlescent drops of his precum. Bubbling to land on the floor below them.
And Soshiro couldn't help but groan.
Feeling himself buck his hips to meet the sensations you dished out. But despite this, he did not falter in his actions at all. Completely enamored that he could touch you and feel you all at the same time. Driving his mind into overdrive the minute his fingers managed to reach deeper into your cunt.
“uh…ahh..I'm close. Soshiro..I'm close..” You had closed your eyes, your movements beginning to turn sloppy as you tried to keep up with his pace. And your shaky moaning had increased in volume since then.
Soshiro could feel the telltale signs of your release. Feeling your cunt squeeze onto his fingers which had been knuckle deep into you at this point. And he too lets out a shaky moan when he feels his semen drip down more steadily from his dick. “Me too..”
“Just..keep your voice down dear.” He spoke slowly. Burying his face unto the crook of your neck before bucking his hips wildly into your hand. His fingers grinding up against your cunt whilst his thumb pressed deeply against your clit to further push you on the edge.
And without warning, you had arched your back to scream.
Soshiro hadn't realized this as you both came. The release for both of you had been too intense that he had forgotten all about Kaiju no. 10 who was still silent but active in his suit. The prototype combat suit which had not been perfected still had somewhat of a mind of its own. Struggling between his mind syncing and its own sentience, that it had wrapped its weaponized tail around the jaw of her mouth. Muffling your pleasured screams.
Your body convulsed at the feeling.
The euphoria traveling in shockwaves as your ivory essence had pooled between your thighs and his hand. Coating it with the liquid that you had not thought you'd be able to reach without Soshiro's expertise. Luckily, his dick was much the same.
Shooting out thick semen that had stained the skin of your calf to create a messy picturesque sequence that he's sure would be number 10’s leverage for the next time they try to test his prototype. And that had been all he needed to know for a sigh to escape his lips. His weird suit sure had its ups and downs he supposes. But if this were to happen again, he'd rather keep you as far away from him when he's wearing this suit for the next time around.
“Sorry..” You had heard Soshiro breathe out. And you watch him in the corner of your eyes. As hair clung against the sweaty sheen of your cheek. The tail that had muffled your mouth slowly retracted upon Soshiro's command. And you could've sworn you heard a faint laughter from within the Number 10. As if he too had been satisfied by such an event.
“What for?” You had smiled. Glancing at the way your lover had breathed heavily. Taking in the steady breathes he needed after the passionate event you had both experienced. And his face had gingerly lifted up from your shoulder. A baffled look crossing his features.
“I didn't mean to attack you like that..I-” He paused. Feeling the way the Combat suit had finally cooled down. Signaling that it had been shut down. Likely because it had not been fitted for a better power source yet. So it shut down before it could even make another snide comment, which Soshiro was sure he'd be doing just about now. And he grits his teeth upon the suit slowly opening up to reveal the compression shirt he wore underneath it.
“Damn this Kaiju..” He whispered. Removing his fingers from your core. And you flinch upon the loss of his warmth.
“It's fine. Was it the Kaiju giving you ideas? or was it all you?” You had asked. Suddenly it was strange that the researcher in you would surface after just touching each other so lewdly earlier.
“Most of it..yeah..” Soshiro had admitted. Awkwardly looking away knowing that he might've crossed boundaries with you. He'd be remiss if you didn't get a little bit angry at the sudden attack. And he wouldn't blame you if you had not wanted to be anywhere near him ever again.
But you surprised him yet again when you moved to kiss him on the lips. Unchanged in the way you felt when you had consented to his advances. And such a kiss leaves him breathless, trying to catch oxygen before it could leave him panting for another.
“Good. I'd be pissed off if you told me you didn't want me at all.”
“Did’ya really think I didn't want you?” He sighed. “I just..wanted you to feel special. Unlike how I treated you before..”
And you couldn't help but smile. Knowing how hard Soshiro had likely been working to make time for you despite the nature of their work. And that fact alone, has been enough for you for some time now.
“It's fine..just make it up to me another time.” You had spoken softly. Wrapping your arms around his neck. And he in turn hugged you just as tightly back.
“I will. I promise you I will, sweetheart.” He spoke. Leaning back in to capture your lips despite the slight fatigue the suit has done to his body. The heaviness didn't matter much to him anymore. And damn the suit if he had to beat into submission on a later date.
His breathlessness had been a rare sight indeed. But Oxygen was all he needed to kiss you breathless too.
#anime#hoshina soshiro x reader#kn8#soshiro hoshina#soshiro hoshina x reader#hoshina soshiro#kaiju no. 8#kaiju no 8 x reader#kn8 x reader#I told you it was the longest word count I have to date#wtf#definitely self indulgent#Just had to get it out of my system#kn8 manga#anime and manga#manga spoilers
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One thing I haven't seen talked about is Crystal's character arc, and specifically the way the timing of it interacts with Charles' arc. They stumble over each other in the worst possible way en route to their respective character growth, and from a narrative perspective, it's absolutely genius.
I'm going to preface all this by saying: none of this is a criticism of Crystal. Part of what makes her such a dynamic, refreshing character is that you don't get to see women in fiction written the way she's been written. You don't get to see women with her flaws that aren't throw-away mean girls or villains. You especially don't get to see women with her traits who learn and grow and become better people. So yeah, I'm going to talk about Crystal's character flaws. No, this isn't Crystal hate. We love our girl in this house. Okay? Okay. Let's start.
Crystal's character arc, at its heart, is all about her learning to be a better person because she has good influences that love and support her for the first time.
When the show starts, Crystal is not a nice person. She's abrasive in a way that's specifically designed to push people away. She's used to getting her own way, and it shows. She's used to having no meaningful connections with anyone, and it shows. She's breathtakingly selfish, in the very literal sense of the definition. She is focused on her self. Her problems are front and center to her; everything is about what she needs, and what she wants, and how she's struggling.
Jenny calls her out very early on. In episode one, Crystal is complaining about the boys, and Jenny, for all her cynicism, strikes right at the heart of the problem. She tells Crystal, "Everybody is always thinking about themselves, all the time." People only care about their own problems. And she says, correctly, that that's what Crystal is doing, too.
This moment is a revelation for Crystal. For the first time, she considers what her behavior looks like from another person's perspective. As she says, she gets mad at herself over it, and that awareness allows her to do something selfless for the first time in the series. She takes a step back and insists that instead of focusing on her problems, they go to help a little girl. It's a big moment for her.
But importantly, she's not done growing as a character here. She's only just getting started.
On my first watch through, I didn't realize how often, over the next few episodes, Crystal redirects things to her problems during conversation, but it's quite a lot. She's still focused on herself – selfish, in that most literal definition of the word. The issues most important to her are her issues. She's starting to learn to think about other people, but she's not there yet. The process is still underway.
Which brings us to Charles.
Charles' arc is a different sort of self-reflection. He's terrified that he's a bad person the way his father was and the way the boys that killed him were.
During the course of the show, he gets systematically stripped of his confidence and made to feel helpless, and just like Crystal needs outside influences to help her reach a more stable place, Charles does, too. He desperately needs reassurance that he isn't everything he's afraid he is.
But my goodness, the timing in their arcs is such a trainwreck when you put them together, and it is brilliant.
Let's start with the Devlin House.
Crystal has some amazing character growth here. She displays genuine concern about Charles, makes an attempt at comforting him, and learns to work with Edwin even though she still doesn't particularly like him at this point.
Charles, meanwhile, is beginning to fall apart. He's just had the worst night of his afterlife. He's been viscerally reminded of how helpless he is. He couldn't stop the Devlins from being killed over and over, just like he couldn't stop his own father's abuse. He messed up his attempted rescue so badly that he was completely out of commission until the case was finished. He managed to help not one single thing. He made no impact at all. He couldn't help those girls any more than he was able to help himself, while he was still alive.
So they get back to the butcher shop, and what do we see? Monty immediately coopts Edwin. Niko doesn't know what's happened because she wasn't there and Charles has been all fake smiles with her. And Crystal goes off with Niko, leaving Charles to flounder on his own in the wake of everything. She's still learning how to support other people. She isn't there yet, and it's extremely on display in this moment.
Then we get the lighthouse episode, and they both get put through the wringer here. Crystal gets her hopes and expectations jerked around by the Night Nurse in the very worst way, and Charles gets hit with a whole pile full of trauma. All that helplessness wells to the forefront again. Combined with being forced to relive some of his worst memories and the desperation to keep Edwin safe from hell, Charles lets himself act on his anger for once.
And what does he get in the aftermath? Horror.
Everyone who cares about him is horrified by what he's done. Edwin goes so far as to call it extreme. They don't know the half of it, of course; they haven't seen what the Night Nurse just put him through. But in this moment Charles is at his absolute lowest, and all he sees is confirmation that he's exactly as terrible as he thinks he is.
That's why Charles shrugs off Edwin's attempt at comfort, here. When he needed to be able to do something to protect Edwin and also himself – when he needed to believe that he could be better than what his father always was – all he sees is the confirmation from the people he cares about most that when push came to shove, he really is a bad guy.
Then comes the aftermath. And this moment is such a brilliant, awful clash of both of their character arcs. It is so delightfully messy.
Because Charles starts to open up to Crystal here. He starts to lay himself bare, the way he ends up doing with Edwin in episode 5. He's on the verge of admitting something that he's been worried about for literal decades. He tells her, "I've been angry for such a long time."
And what does Crystal do? She's still in the midst of her own character growth. She's still struggling to support other people. She's still learning how to. In a lot of ways, though she's made progress already, she's still that selfish girl that Jenny called out in the very first episode.
And she shows it here it with the absolute worst possible timing. No sooner has Charles started to talk about what's bothering him than she cuts in with her own problems. She's tired of riddles and spirits and demons and not knowing who she is. And the look on Charles' face. The moment when he visibly sets aside his own problems, because Crystal doesn't need any more disasters on her plate? It's heartbreaking. You can actually track the subtle change in his expression there. The actor does a phenomenal job.
And then comes the kiss. And what spurs it? Crystal saying she needs something real.
This moment isn't about light-hearted attraction, the way the earlier flirting is. It's Charles setting aside what he needs – comfort and reassurance and a moment to talk through the things that have been tearing him apart – to give her what she says she wants. He can't even feel it. And Crystal isn't far enough along in her character growth here to realize how selfish she's being. Like Jenny said way back in episode one, she's only thinking about herself.
And then comes the absolute unmitigated disaster of episode 5.
Straight out the gate, Charles leans in for a kiss. From his perspective, they have something together; there's affection there. Charles "I think I'd miss kissing" Rowland, who has been starved for meaningful physical contact for thirty years, is not in a hurry to give this up.
But Crystal is fresh out of a nightmare where she conflates Charles with her abusive ex. She withdraws; she calls what they had a distraction. She cuts it off almost as soon as it's started, so focused on her own worries here that she misses how damn fake Charles' smile is, to cover up that he's coming to pieces.
To be clear, she's absolutely not in the wrong here. It is 1000% her prerogative not to jump into a relationship again while she's still struggling to work through what happened with David. But the arc of her narrative is still early enough that she does it all without so much as the awareness that her focus on her own issues has hurt Charles terribly.
And then the episode really kicks off, and both of them are in shambles in very different ways.
Crystal is projecting her issues with David onto Charles. She has a lot of history, and David seems as though he's exactly the right sort of toxic to leave lasting a lasting impact. But Charles hasn't done anything to deserve her assumptions, and he takes the brunt of her temper here and throughout the episode.
Charles is desperately projecting onto the dead jocks. He very badly wants them to be good guys, because he sees himself in them and he needs himself to be a good guy. He snipes back at Crystal for the very first time in this episode, and he does it in the worst way possible, accidentally prodding her where it will do the most damage.
They're both hurting. They both say some truly painful things to one another.
She does not need to hear that she has unsorted hangups about David still plaguing her while she's unable to move past them. He desperately does not need anyone to tell him that he has rage issues while he's still struggling to think of himself as a decent person.
They apologize, in the end. They start to move past it.
But it's telling that Charles doesn't try to open up to Crystal again. He goes to Edwin instead, even though Edwin is the one who called his actions regarding the Night Nurse extreme. He gets the reassurance he needs so badly; he gets the connection he was looking for with Crystal from Edwin, instead. (I have a lot of thoughts on why Charles initially tries to open up to Crystal so quickly, but it is very much an aside, and this is already extremely long, so it will have to wait for another write-up.)
But the important thing here is, Edwin is the one to offer Charles what he needs to overcome the self-doubt eating him alive. Edwin provides the physical affection Charles was seeking in the form of that long-overdue hug. Edwin is the one who's able to reaffirm for him that he's not just a good guy, he's the best person Edwin knows.
And for all intents and purposes, Charles' major character arc ends here.
Charles has a few last little moments to go on the path to rebuilding his own self-image, after this, but for the most part his concerns have been resolved. He saves Crystal in episode 6 and Edwin in episode 7, proving to himself that he's able to make a difference in the face of overwhelming odds. He's not helpless, no matter what the Night Nurse told him; he can be a force for good in the world. By the end of the series, his crisis of self-doubt seems to have been largely overcome.
But it's the conversation with Edwin at the end of episode 5 that really allows him to work through his most pressing issues. Edwin is there to help support him when he stumbles. Edwin provides him the comfort he was looking for while Crystal was too worried about her own problems to notice how badly he needed the help.
Crystal, meanwhile, still has a ways to go after episode 5. The last three episodes are where she does her most important character growth.
In episode 6, she learns some hard lessons about keeping secrets and letting people help and appreciate you even when you can't offer them anything in return. And Charles, importantly, is there for her every step of the way. He consistently offers her physical and emotional support. He models for her, in a very real way, what it looks like to have someone prop you up when you need the help.
And in turn, Crystal steps in to save the boys. She's the big damn hero at the end of this episode.
The breakthrough continues into episode 7. She's so intent on helping to get Edwin out of hell that she literally goes to face her own demons, not for herself for once – not for her own purposes or needs or wants – but because she wants to help someone else.
And episode 8, at long last, brings her to the culmination of her character arc.
Crystal is at her absolute lowest here. Her family, the people who were supposed to love her unconditionally, didn't even realize she was gone. Her precious memories, that she's spent the entire series trying to regain, have showed her that she's not the person she hoped she would be. She's overwhelmed enough that she means to flee, to cut herself off from her new friends entirely.
Then the boys get kidnapped. And just like that, she makes up her mind.
For the first time since the start of the series, she sets aside her most important issues in order to let what other people need take precedence. She disregards all of her own personal concerns and focuses instead on others. She's finally stepped out of those selfish impulses that Jenny calls her out on, all the way back in the first episode. She's finally learned how to support other people when they need it.
Crystal has finally figured out how to be there for others, despite having troubles of her own.
It's a lovely arc, and it's beautifully done.
Charles' is just as touching.
And god damn, but it was a brilliant narrative choice to have their character arcs line up in exactly the wrong way.
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Recently, through Twitter, I have become aware of the fact that modern American parents have been very ignorant of their parental duties when it comes to their children. Parents are banding together to complain about the schools their children attend because their kids are getting bad grades in class, or they're getting detentions for doing bad consistently, or they're being held back because they're just not at the same level as their peers.
There was an entire thread of some woman whining about how the school was failing her kid, because his English class grade was so bad. There were thousands of comments agreeing and various reposts with anecdotes from other parents with similar experiences.
"My 26 y/o son can't even write a check for God's sake!"
And one single person finally replied with, "Do you guys not teach your kids anything at home before they start going to school?" Which then spawned people with actual common sense questioning the level of involvement these people had in the lives of their kids.
This is what led to a large surge of people complaining about how it's the school's job to teach them everything and they did their job just keeping them alive.
Now, I don't want to be mean, but it's gonna come across that way.
Parents are lazy these days.
When I was a child, my Nana and mom had me learning with Hooked on Phonics before I entered pre-K. I was 3 years old and already sounding out words that rhymed. I was practicing how quickly I could say them in under 30 seconds so I could progress to the next lesson.
mat hat
sat that
cat vat
pat bat
fat lat
rat brat
etc...
When I was in pre-K(4 years old), they had a single, really old computer that had a bunch of Winnie the Pooh CD-ROM games. Because I always got my work done faster than everybody else, they let me use the computer because I could actually read and follow Pooh's instructions, and it kept me busy.
And when I entered kindergarten for the first time, I was really surprised to see that Hooked on Phonics was actually part of my curriculum and I was already very well ahead of everyone else. My mom and Nana took traching me very seriously. They not only read to me, but they would also get me Madeline books and cassette tapes from the children's library downtown. And then I would listen to the cassettes telling the story while reading the book at the same time to get used to the words.
At three years old, I was helping out in the kitchen, learning all of the different kitchen utensils and types of measurement. My mom often went between English, French and American Sign Language at random times so I picked up a lot of stuff that way. We never had a computer in the house for the first 12 years of my life, but I did have an old keyboard to learn how to type. Nana gave me basic piano lessons for a couple years. Mom taught me how to hem my clothes because she would buy me bigger clothes, hem them to size, and then let them out as I grew. Hell, Sperm Donor taught me how to write a check when I was 8. He was also a Financial Adviser, so I got a lot of lessons on money management, investments, and 401Ks and shit.
All these incredibly simple things ended up benefiting me later on, because I was so far ahead of all of the other students that it consistently put me at odds with them. I was better at reading, cooking, sewing, music, languages, etc... I was allowed time to do whatever I wanted while the rest of them had to catch up.
There is a lot more to being a parent than just making sure your kid eats three meals a day and doesn't die in a stupid way. And it seems like a lot of parents these days have completely forgotten that they have a duty to their kids beyond the feeding and clothing thing.
Certain things SHOULD be taught in schools, like how to balance a checkbook. But if it's clear that the school won't cover it, why aren't YOU doing something about that? And why do so many parents have no clue what the hell their kids are even getting up to in school? Why don't y'all get involved in your kid's lives?
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I loved your analysis of the Romeo and Juliet reference in Taylors song it was such a perfect example of why people praise her songwriting so much without realising how hollow it is. I also especially loved how when someone commented that they didn’t have a large enough vocab to understand your post, you actually responded really nicely and offered to explain! It’s such a bare minimum thing but so rare to see on the Internet where people often just ignore such comments or become pretentious. Anyway, definitely earned a follow because your posts seem really cool and I hope you do more song analysis posts, whether they’re praising or critiquing music.
Hello! Apologies for taking so long to get back to you! I’ve been in middle of moving (and it’s taking up much of my time ahaha). I’m glad to hear that you enjoyed my Romeo and Juliet post. I love that play- mostly because of its sly, subversive nature and social reform thematic purpose. I remember reading it in High School and how that was one of the first times I was consciously aware of the power literature holds to shift culture and move public consciousness towards progressive ideologies. Remarkable. For that reason, Swift’s repeated misunderstanding, and blatant, purposeful ignorance surrounding the plays, has always frustrated me.
I will be returning to the topic to write about the infamous “Love Story” (2009), and I’m also going to debunk a couple of her other literary references like The Scarlett Letter one. Also, I will be posting something about her bastardization of Daphne du Maurier’s “Rebecca” (1938) because she over-simplified the thematic point of the book and made it seem silly, and frivolous, instead of the hard-hitting social reform literature that it is. Much of my frustration with Swift stems from her use of literary genius, and the way she twists these stories into empty- ego-driven narratives that singularly focus on break-ups or centering her aspirations towards praising hetero-patriarchal standards in her music.
I’m fucking over it- Y'all.
She has this way of taking literary references, some of the most famous and important works in history, and remaking it into something dull, derivative and nonsensical. She incinerates the plotlines and erases the methodology of the literary work through demeaning the intrinsic social reform efforts of the works themselves. For instance, with my post on her work and the reference to “Romeo and Juliet” I mention how Swift purposely leaves out, or negates, Shakespeare intentional social reform phenomenological base to the line “O be some other name/ What’s in a name?” Shakespeare himself is clearly drawing attention to the ways in which people often judge not by the content of our characters but by shallow intonation of our names and station in society. He is using these lines, and the two characters, to show how hypocritical and judgmental it is to uphold petty difference over the ideal of believing in the prospects of human connection. Shakespeare was a radical in his day- he pulled no punches to criticizing the aristocracy or the values of post-feudal hierarchal institutions.
Swift took such an intentional aspect of his work, his social reform efforts, and purposely divorced it from the line. Thus, remaking, rewording, it into her line, which was a silly, and self-centered, petulant line about how people really should have been nicer to her because she’s a good girl. It’s so fucking stupid- imagine trying to remake Shakespeare without understanding Shakespeare. I cannot abide- now that I’m grown, and no longer a child, who could mindlessly listen to her bastardization of important literary work- I simply must speak up. It’s important because, I think, that her purposeful misuse of the work- making it devoid of social reform- says a lot about her intentions as a person. She’s not the activist people think she is- she's just another pseudo-intellectual grifter.
Anyway, I’m glad you found something worthwhile in that post- and I hope you’ve enjoyed some of my other posts since then. I admit that I sometimes venture into posting mere opinion- but for my more serious posts I will stick to interrogation of her work through literary invocation. It’s just what I know best.
If anyone has any questions about my posts- or confusions about my vocabulary use- I am happy to chat and answer questions! I really meant it when I told that person that I would be happy to re-explain using some different words. Sometimes- I get carried away and slip into “academic jargon” but that’s not what I want my blog to devolve into. I want to share information with people who perhaps have not studied literature- or English. I wouldn’t judge anyone just for having a question or being confused about a certain word. I, myself, make a habit of studying other languages- besides English- and that does wonders for keeping me humble about my own knowledge of English. Haha. :) I do not express myself nearly so well in French or German- so it becomes much easier for me to empathize with those who have a hard time expressing themselves with language too. Language is hard- learning is even more difficult. But what a wonderful, rewarding venture it is to ask a question and learn something new!
I encourage people’s curiosity- truly.
And yes- I will certainly be posting about other artists as well. Haha, now that I feel comfortable doing so- I will have some fun with it :)
Thank you for writing in- I am sending you well-wishes and good vibes.
#anti taylor swift#ex swiftie#taylor swift critical#english lit student#literary criticism#shakespeare#anti swifties#taylor swift#romeo and juliet#Rebecca#Rebecca 1938
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I'm really excited about Mystery Person because if we want (some of) the issues of Hero Society to be addressed and not just by a vague text blurb that says "It Was Dealt With And Everyone Lived Happily Ever After," this is literally our last chance.
Mirio says in his speech that a Hero's battle is often about turning a 'minus' back into a zero. This is probably because Heroes, as First Responders of a sort, can really only react, and they're reacting to something going wrong - something deviating from the default, the 'zero'.
Something going wrong, something deviating from the default... like Villains. They're the 'minuses'. Heroes react to stop the Villains, to save as many people as they can from their rampage, and try bring it back to 'zero', where no lives were lost. And yet, nothing was gained. Devastation still happened. Especially, I think, for the Villain, who was turned into a 'minus' way before a Hero ever showed up.
Toga is a Villain. But she wasn't always. Once, she was living a normal, 'zero' life - and this life included quirk counseling where she got ironed out to be nice and 'normal'. It included her parents calling her inhuman, and her repressing herself and her feelings.
When she stabbed a classmate and went on the run, things became a 'minus'. When Ochako reached out to her and saved her heart... did that make things go back to zero? Ochako stopped her rampage, gave her relief from some of her pain, and even got Toga to donate blood to her, so in some ways, yes. But is returning to 'zero' any good for Toga? Because her zero was repression and abuse and ostracism - the problems that plague Hero Society; this zero was exactly what lead to her become a Villain. For Toga, things can't be a zero again. Things have to become a 'plus'.
And so we have Mystery Person.
Despite a vague similar look, the straitjacket they look like they're wearing is nothing at all like what Kurogiri was wearing - the part around the neck is completely different. Mystery Person's outfit collar is tighter, and tied up like a suture. It's not the standard straitjacket given to Tartarus prisoners (which are also onesies).
It is also not a prison uniform from Tartarus or Mikuzu - back, collars, and general form are different.
Neither is the mask/gag on their face - No similarity to the ones used in Tartarus, or by the police.
Nor is the rope that's tied around their arm something from Tartarus. Tartarus doesn't use rope. It uses straps; meanwhile, the police use some sort of plated restraints and metal handcuff-boxes.
Wherever they're escaping from, it's not a jail or facility (and not from a Ujiko clinic or orphanage), but a simple family house.
(@stillness-in-green notes that its fence-wall isn't covered with graffiti like Toga or Gentle's house, either, so no one is aware of a 'criminal' staying there.)
I think what this means is that someone went through great trouble of mimicking a Villain's imprisonment treatment on this person... but the person isn't actually a Villain. This person is not a 'minus'.
I think this person has been living in their version of 'zero', and it's long past time for Heroes to turn 'zeroes' like these into pluses.
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Points
Please keep going with the omega cap tav and alpha riley
I have
A kidney to trade for a continuation of the post? Thats about it tho.
I saw the other ask I promise this is fine honestly it's flattering I say the same things. (Anyways you will now forever be known as the kidney annon wear it with a badge of honor)
ANYWAY
(X)
Price who had been sniffing after MacTavish sense not long after meeting him impressed with how competent he was. But after being captured in the gulag he didn't think he'd ever see the omega again.
However being rescued by said Omega was probably the highlight of his life. MacTavish had somehow become even more competent and self-assured in the past 5 years....and Price wanted him terribly.
Once ecaping the gulag he had been surprised that there was another member of the party he wasn't aware of. Another alpha who went by Ghost, but Tav called him Riley. Riley had crowded them and specifically MacTavish shouting about how they could have all died. Roach the Beta the had almost killed and subsequently saved looked annoyed but pleased seemingly fawning in the attention.
Riley flicked him in the forehand not pleased with a smile during the dressing down. Tav just laughed A sound like church bells to Price.
A few missions later as Price reasserted himself into his rightful position is when reality hit like a freight train. They were coming back from Price launching nukes. Riley was beyond pissed and wouldn't even look in his direction. As they exit the plane however something shocking happened. MacTavish greeted them as he always did perfect Omega when Riley hurried off the plan and into the Captain's arms.
Price was left shocked beyond speech as his world tried to crumble. MacTavish just smilled widely and chirped happily at the alpha in his arms. "Simon you ok?" MacTavish asked low his voice still vibrating with a purr. Riley nodded wardlessly as he let out a content rumble.
Price had to put his alpha in a stranglehold to prevent the snarl that wanted to leave him at the site of HIS (not his not his not hi-) Omega curling around this alpha that wasn't him.
Why would Soap do this he earned the Omega he saved his life a million times why wasn't it him?!
"Captain why the FACK did the nukes go off?!" MacTavish growled and It must have shocked Riley back into remembering because the alpha turned and started snarling at him. Price's hackles raised.
"It's saved their ass they should be thanking me." Price reported (why was soap talking back to him he was the superior the Omega needed to learn his place). Soap just continued snarling at him, "How many people do ya think are dead because of ye?"
"How many people are alive because of me?!" Price shouted back. MacTavish looked beyond pissed at that. "Simon on me let's go get ye some rest mo chridhe. God knows ye need it " Riley took off his sunglasses and mismatched eyes full of so much love it made Price physically ill. "Ok my mate anythin' yous want.
He was too late...
But maybe if Riley was out of the way....
#call of duty modern warfare#cod modern warfare#john soap mactavish#soap x ghost#ghoap#captain mactavish#09 ghost#09 soapghost#simon ghost riley#resi responds#kidney anon#alpha beta omega#a/b/o#omegaverse
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⌛⭐ We must going on
Title from WONDERLAND (ATEEZ)
Summary: Seonghwa’s bronchitis rears its ugly head during a meeting. Mingi always pays attention to his hyung's wellbeing.
CW: mentions of fainting, vomit
Sickie: Seonghwa
Caretaker: Mingi
Seonghwa felt Awful. Capital A.
And Embarrassed. Also capital E.
If he had known how much time an idol spent in meeting during their careers he would have reconsidered auditioning. But, alas, he had not known which brought him to his current predicament: Sitting in a meeting with some high-up executives after a sleepless night of coughing and chills.
His throat hurt, he was freezing and every minute or so he had to turn away to cough into his elbow. Even the CEO was throwing him worried glances but - like everybody else - refrained from speaking. It was after all well known that Seonghwa did not get sick. Even if he was coughing and probably running a fever and feeling awful, he was not sick.
He refused to be.
Hongjoong had argued with him over him coming into work that morning but even he had had to admit defeat. San and/or Mingi must have snitched on him. Top Ten anime betrayals.
Seonghwa had long given up on paying attention to what the meeting was about. Honestly, he wasn’t even sure he had even known in the first place. He was more preoccupied with sipping on his tea and not spitting out the cough drop in his mouth every time he had to cough.
It hurt. It really hurt to cough - not just in his throat but also in his chest. Something really must have it out for him. Karma, he would have called it but he couldn’t recall doing anything that deserved this.
Even in Yunho’s borrowed hoodie (Seonghwa had had to grudgingly accept it earlier in the car because he had been so cold he was sure his fingers were about to fall off) he was still shivering and trembling. He sighed.
God, he should not have done that. Another coughing fit took hold of him, causing his whole body to shake with the force of it. It was more violent than before and he turned away so he wouldn’t have to look at the other people in the room. His eyes watered and he couldn’t fucking stop. His throat was being shredded, at least it felt like it. Vaguely he was aware of the CEO stopping to talk and a worried hand on his back but all he could focus on was trying to catch his breath. His chest felt awfully tight.
“Hwa? Hwa?”, a voice came through the fog in his head and he glanced with eyes tearing up at his captain.
“I’m fine”, Seonghwa gasped, finally able to draw a breath again, “I’m okay.”
“Why don’t you go home, Seonghwa-yah?”, the CEO asked gently, a bit of pity in his voice. Seonghwa hated it. He did not want to be pitied. He was an adult in his mid-twenties and the oldest of the group. He didn’t get to get sick. There were seven dongsaengs relying on him.
“I’m sorry for the interruption, abeoji”, Seonghwa apologized, “I’m fine. Continue, please.”
The CEO sighed and nodded, then continued his speech.
⌛
The next fifteen minutes Seonghwa painfully tried to suppress his coughs with more or less success. None of the managers or executives were able to meet his gaze though Seonghwa knew he must look unfocused and tired. His members were throwing him concerned glances which he ignored. Mingi even had a hand on Seonghwa’s back, soothingly running his huge palm up and down over Seonghwa’s spine. While he normally would have hated the attention from a dongsaeng when sick he couldn’t deny it felt nice. He glared at Hongjoong before the captain could even bring attention to it.
But even despite Mingi’s efforts Seonghwa was still sick, even if he didn’t want to admit it. His chest was burning like it was on fire and he constantly had to focus on keeping his breathing even. But he succeeded in not coughing again.
Until he didn’t succeed anymore.
He lost his focus on his breathing for just a second but it was enough. Seonghwa pitched forward, not even having time to turn around before the next fit took hold. He buried his face in his elbow and coughed. It felt like the eruption of a long dormant volcano, burning, hot and painful.
His mouth filled with something and he spat out some disgusting yellowish mucus into the sleeve of Yunho’s hoodie. He’d have to apologize to the other later. For now, he needed to leave, he didn’t want to disturb the meeting any further.
“Excuse me”, Seonghwa mumbled and pushed his chair, which was only saved from clattering to the floor by Hongjoong, back. He stumbled to his feet and rushed out of the room. He couldn’t stay in there, making them watch again and have them worry. It had been embarrassingly enough the first time.
But staying out in the public hallway was as bad as the meeting room, so Seonghwa hurried in the direction of the bathrooms, trying not to faint as his vision turned black from the lack of air and the need to cough again. He didn’t make it far until he stumbled, crashing into a wall and likely bruising his shoulder. It hurt. His throat hurt. His chest hurt. He couldn’t breathe properly. He was dizzy and his vision was spotty.
With a frustrated yell, pulling at his hair, he gave up and sunk to his knees. Well, he tried.
Suddenly a hand was at his elbow, the same spot he had spat the mucus into but the person didn’t seem to care at all.
“Hyung? Hyungie?”, a frightened but at the same time determined voice asked, “please don’t faint on me.”
Seonghwa coughed again, blinking back tears and stared up at his savior.
Mingi?
It wasn’t as unexpected as his first instinct had him believe, Seonghwa supposed. Mingi, while easily scared and sometimes very much a maknae, always had been very in tune with Seonghwa’s health. And his easy-going nature and his puppy eyes never failed to make Seonghwa feel bad for pushing him away.
“Hyung?”, Mingi repeated, a bit more frantic now. Right, he hadn’t replied.
“I’m okay, Mingi-yah. Not gonna pass out”, Seonghwa reassured. Mingi, however, didn’t look reassured.
“Seonghwa-hyung, you’re clearly sick and not feeling well. I could hear you coughing all night. So could San. Stop pretending, please. We’re so worried”, Mingi whispered, a bit angrily.
Seonghwa breathed out and nodded. He really had no foundation to build his arguments on. But breathing - breathing of all things - triggered another coughing fit. He doubled over and gasped: “Mingi, bathroom. Please.”
There was no way he could hold back coughing anymore and he did not want to be the main attraction of a show in the middle of a KQ hallway. Mingi seemed to understand and immediately began supporting his hyung the last meters to sanctuary.
As soon as Mingi had shouldered open the door Seonghwa tumbled towards the sinks, bracing himself on the porcelaine and coughed. His long hair fell into his face but he couldn’t care less. All he could focus on was the burning.
He couldn’t do anything to stop the torture, his throat and chest working against him. He coughed over and over again, the only thing keeping him from falling forward and bashing his head in the sink was Mingi’s hands on his shoulders. Seonghwa tried to focus on that, the feeling of somebody being there while he felt like he was suffocating.
It was minutes of coughing without break and Seonghwa was starting to feel faint again. He was getting light-headed from lack of air and his vision grew spotty. Still his body didn’t have mercy.
It was the opposite really. Just as Seonghwa felt like maybe he could stop soon, he suddenly tasted sour bile in his throat and with the next cough a small amount of his stomach contents came up, splattering onto the white surface.
Seonghwa didn’t have the capacity to feel shocked or disgusted, despite his hair taking a hit. All he could do was squeeze his eyes shut and pray for death, as another cough triggered a new wave of vomit.
Mingi muttered what sounded suspiciously like a curse and let go of him. Seonghwa whimpered. He didn’t want to be alone now, though he knew he was disgusting.
“It’s okay, hyung, I got you”, Mingi soothed and then his hands gathered Seonghwa’s hair, uncaring of its state and bundled it up at the back of his neck. Once he could hold it with one hand, he placed his other on Seonghwa’s back and rubbed gentle circles on it.
It was probably the nicest thing Seonghwa had ever felt. It didn’t matter that the coughing made him throw up more and more, it didn’t matter that his knees were shaking, it didn’t matter that everything hurt. The only thing that mattered was Mingi holding him through it all.
⌛
And then it was over. He hadn’t even thought it possible anymore, thought he was forever trapped in limbo between breathlessness and pain. But finally the coughing stopped.
His arms were shaking from the effort of holding himself up and just as they buckled he managed to shove himself backwards, trusting his dongsaeng to catch him. Mingi did. Of course, he did. It was like he had expected it: He wrapped his arms around Seonghwa’s waist and guided him to the floor.
Seonghwa shivered as he came in contact with the cold tiles and yet it was a relief, the coolness against his fevered skin.
“Oh, hyung”, Mingi mumbled as he knelt down in front of Seonghwa. He was holding some paper towels and gently began wiping at the eldest’s face. Tears, snot and traces of vomit were easily wiped away, leaving a red-faced, flushed and exhausted hyung in its wake.
“I don’t feel good, Mingi-yah”, Seonghwa whispered brokenly. He hated to admit it but he couldn’t hold it in anymore. Hot, salty tears spilled down his face and the only thing preventing him from bursting into sobs was that his body was so tired it physically couldn’t. His strength was fading so quickly he wouldn’t even be surprised if he passed out.
Seonghwa felt humiliated, exhausted and so, so sick. His head was pulsing, his chest aching and his muscles were sore. He just wanted to go home, take some medication and sleep.
Mingi, seemingly sensing how close his hyung was to breaking, carefully gathered him in his arms and Seonghwa buried his face in his neck. Warm hands ran down his spine and never before had Seonghwa been so grateful that Mingi - despite his personality - was so tall. He felt … protected in a way he hadn’t for a long time.
“Hyung, let me call a manager, okay? We can go to the doctor, get you some meds and then you can sleep all you want, hm?”
Exhaustedly, Seonghwa nodded, not removing himself from the younger.
“Tell Yunho I’m sorry for ruining his hoodie”, he mumbled.
“Yunho cares more about your health than his hoodie, hyung”, Mingi said gently and pressed a kiss against Seonghwa’s hair.
Within seconds Mingi had his phone in his hand and was talking into it softly. Seonghwa didn’t care to listen, he just closed his eyes and drifted.
⌛
Seonghwa woke up to a manager coming into the bathroom and helping Mingi lift him into his arms. He let his eyes flutter close again and just laid his head against Mingi’s shoulder.
The doctor’s visit passed in a blurr. There were tests and questions but in the end Seonghwa could barely puzzle together what had happened in detail. He only knew that a larger hand never let go of his.
Once back at the dorm Seonghwa was dosed up with medication and a warm, fuzzy blanket was pulled over him. A solid weight against his back held onto him and Seonghwa let himself drift.
Maybe … maybe being vulnerable wasn’t so bad.
Masterlist links:
Tafee - Full Masterlist
Tafee's Masterlist - ATEEZ
Notes: I am having an awful cold at the moment so I feel the anon requester and Seonghwa so hard at the moment. My voice is gone and my friends keep laughing at me. Fair, though.
#kpop#kpop sick#kpop sickfic#ateez sickfic#ateez#sickfic#seonghwa#seonghwa sickie#caretaker mingi#⌛#request fill#request answer#🧚🏻♀️#⭐#Title from WONDERLAND (ATEEZ)#sick seonghwa#🐣#emeto#cough#sick ateez#kpop blog
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When Tulips Kiss | Hwang Hyunjin SMAU
CHAPTERS: 𝜗𝜚 two | three | 𝜗𝜚 four
WORD COUNT: 1.5k
CONTAINS: alcohol consumption
LOVESTAY NIGHTCLUB!!!
Applying a pink shade of powdered blush on the apples of your cheeks, you finish your look off with a subtle highlight on the bridge of your nose, your inner corners, and finally, your cheekbones. Spritzing a fine mist of setting spray on your face, you open your eyes to see your roommate staring at you from the mirror, and you can’t help but let out a short laugh.
“Is there something I can help you with??” You asked the starry-eyed girl as she blinked herself back to awareness, smiling shyly.
“Actually yes!! I needed help to zip up the back of my dress, but wow… I got distracted by your beauty, seriously! It’s unmatched. I really do have the most beautiful friends ever.” Chuu smiles at you in complete fondness as you stand up with a smile to match hers, turning her around to zip the back of her dress.
“You are what you surround yourself with! You are so incredible, inside AND out. Are you ready to go?” You question as you sit back down on the vanity bench to put your pink heels on to match your outfit. Chuu nods her head and playfully curtsies before stretching out her hand for yours.
“Shall we go, M’lady?” She drops her voice an octave to imitate that of a man as you laugh at her antics, giving your hand into hers.
It was no wonder why Chuu was so popular and loved by everyone she came across. Ever since you had known her, she had always been the type of girl to see the best in everyone and somehow help bring it out of them. She was always so open-minded about everything and was always encouraging others to do whatever they please and not let other people drag them down. You wrapped your arm around hers while the two of you walked in the direction towards the nightclub since it wasn’t that far away from campus anyway, and money was tight for the both of you right now to spend it on a cab. LOVESTAY Nightclub was, and still is, the buzz around campus. Pretty much every university and college within 30 miles of the vicinity went to this specific nightclub, so to say you were a little excited is an understatement. You and Chuu walked down the street in comfortable silence, occasionally pointing at stray cats and small birds on the road, squealing over them. You’re not sure how much time passed by, maybe ten minutes? Or was it fifteen? Until you arrived at the front of the nightclub. The vivid glow of the neon sign painted the duo’s skin with a red gloss.
“You just gonna stand there and look at the sign? Let’s go Y/N!!” Chuu tugged and led the way inside the club as your eyes looked around, admiring the atmosphere. There wasn’t much you could see due to the dim lighting paired with the blaring lights, so you were thankful that Chuu’s grip on your hand was secure. Otherwise, you would have undoubtedly gotten lost in the crowd for sure.
“Do you want to sit down at the bar for some drinks first???” Chuu questioned in a yell, as the music made it difficult to hear each other even within arms distance.
“Yeah!!! I haven’t drunk alcohol in a hot minute though, so I’ll just take it easy tonight!!!” You yelled back as she nodded in agreement before taking the both of you to the bar, taking a seat on the stools. The music was a bit quieter on this side of the club, much to your relief. It’s not often that you go to places like this, so it’s still not something you’re used to, but it’s almost always a fun experience. Maybe not the brightest idea to go when you have to go back to class the following day, MORNING even. As if on cue, Chuu taps your shoulder as you turn your head to face her, only to be greeted with a sheepish grin.
“Maybe we should have just gone on a Friday night, now that I really think about it. If you change your mind about being here, I’m not complaining!!” Chuu laughs a little as you laugh along. As much as she’s an amazing person to be around, her decisions are often impromptu, but you believe that’s just one of the many reasons why she’s an incredible friend. There’s never a dull moment whenever you’re with her.
“It’s okay, I wanna stay! We don’t have to do a lot of dancing or drinking tonight, honestly just hanging out with you is enough.” You teasingly flirt with your close friend as she playfully rolls her eyes and nudges your side. You share your laughs for a little bit before a good-looking bartender approaches the two of you.
“Hey! Can I get you both anything to drink?” The handsome young man, seemingly in his early-mid twenties, questions with a small smile. You both look at each other with a look before bursting out into giggles. Chuu knew you too well, this guy was your type. While she isn’t attracted to men, she can most definitely tell when a man is handsome, and the bartender definitely was.
“Nothing for me, thanks. But this girl right here?” Chuu points at you before winking, “She’ll have a drink. Y/N I’m gonna go on the dance floor!!!!!!” She blows you a kiss, and before you could have protested, she dashes off to god knows where. You shake your head at your friend’s outburst before turning back to the man with a smile, who then returned it.
“So then, what would the pretty lady want to drink for tonight?” He asks once more, waiting for your answer as you stop to think about it. You’re not much of a drinker, so you’re not really educated on all the kinds of drinks. The only drink you know and enjoy is the- “Midori Sour, please.”
He lets out a small chuckle and nods at you. “Cute drink for a cute girl. I’ll make it right away.” He goes to mix up the drink, leaving you there a little dazed at his comment. You take this time to turn your body around and scan the crowd in hopes of seeing Chuu, but sadly she was nowhere to be found. You heard the glass clink on the table in front of you, causing you to direct your attention back to the bartender.
“Your Midori Sour.” He slides the glass over to you as you thank him for the drink.
“It’s on the house, I’ll pay for it. My name’s Minho, it’s a pleasure meeting you….?” The man, who you now know as Minho, trails off, presumably so you could tell him your name.
“Y/N, it’s a pleasure to meet you too! How long have you been working here?” You tilt your head and rest your chin in the palm of your hand. His eyes widen a bit at the mention of your name, but it goes unnoticed by you.
“Y/N, huh? I’ve been working here for a little over six months. How about you? Do you work? Or are you just focusing on college right now?” His demeanor stays as smooth as before like nothing had happened. You nod in acknowledgment before going on to answer his question.
“I work at my grandma’s floral boutique, Song of the Flowers. Have you heard of it? It’s a little ways down the road from here!” You mentioned with noticeably more energy than you had before. You love to talk about the family business whenever it’s brought up, as it’s something you’re proud of and something you plan on continuing, so you hope to promote it as much as you can, whenever you can. Minho laughs at your sudden burst of energy and pats your head.
“I haven’t, but I’ll definitely come by to check you it out.” He remarks and grins at you. There’s a bit of silence between the two of you and you take this time to intake his beauty. Wow. He’s fucking BREATHTAKING. The black button-up shirt that isn't buttoned up all the way, the rolled sleeves exposing his muscular forearms. Holy. Shit. Your eyes travel back up to his eyes. He’s got long eyelashes too, what else does he have?
“Has anyone told you how beautiful you look?” You blurted out without thinking, your face turning red. You grab your drink and chug it halfway as you hear his melodic laugh echo in your head. He has a pretty laugh too? What the FUCK.
“I wouldn’t say beautiful, but handsome yes. You think I’m beautiful??” He teases and flashes you a cheeky smirk.
“I- uh. Yeah, I do. Sorry I need to look for my friend, it’s getting late. Thank you so much for the company tonight! I hope I see you around, maybe at the boutique? Anyways bye Minho!!!” You rushed your words out of your mouth in a panic, and before he could even respond, you dashed away just the same as your friend did to you moments ago. You take your phone out of your pocket, only to find text messages from Chuu, saying that she went back to the dorm room, but that she called a cab to wait for you outside the nightclub, and you couldn’t be any more thankful.
Minho chuckles to himself while shaking his head. Was that really the same Y/N that his friend despises so much? Minho had only met Hyunjin this year so he didn’t know as much as the others did, but he hoped that it was a different Y/N. He’s almost sure that it was a different Y/N, because there’s no way this is the same backstabbing girl he described. He continues on with his shift, images and thoughts of you fogging his mind.
A/N: yes, this is still a hyunjin x reader smau LOL. just wanted to add a little drama before we get there🤔 i wasn’t kidding abt the slow burn! not proofread, sorry if it’s a little messy hehe…
𝜗𝜚 WTK series masterlist
TAGLIST (OPEN)! @jeonginplsholdmyhand @jeonginsgirl @mlrroh @mafiulaputaama @seungzsmin @hannie-bees
if your blog was italicized, it means i wasn’t able to tag you :’(
#when tulips kiss#stray kids#stray kids smau#hyunjin x reader#hyunjin#lee know#skz minho#seungmin#skz i.n#jeongin#bang chan#changbin#lee felix#skz jisung#han jisung#chuu#chaewon#skz
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Hello
Hope im not bothering you and I dont know if this had been talked about before on your blog but I was really really curious about your opinion on something. I know we have to take a grain of salt when it comes to actors interview cause they don't write the show but what are your thoughts on Ryan using neutral gender pronouns when talking about Eddie's possible futur relationships? (Using partner and themselves instead of girlfriend or herself when he has been until the marisol break up very much explicit with using lots of femal pronouns concerning Eddie's love interest and relationships)
Like I said I know Ryan most likely isn't aware of much for season 8 but its very likely that some stuff must have been talked about and I dont want to be that buddie shipper but to me it's screams that it has been talked about, and I'm not saying it has been confirmed among themselves but with him using gender neutral it screams so loud that at least buddie has been talked about. Sorry that was long but its been wracking my brain and I really wanted your opinion cause honestly I love being one of your avons cause you are always lovely and sweet and formulate very lovely responses (thank you so much btw cause I really really love when you answer me ❤️)
Lots of love from anon that appreciate you like im sure many others do ;)
HI BABE IM SO SORRY I NEGLECTED YOU💐💐💐💐 I only just caught up on the interviews that had dropped
Like these bits oml the secret optimist in me is SCREAMING
Like yes Ryan is stressing a million times that s8 is very much a question mark on what will happen and that he as an actor is the last to know yada yada but I love the way Ryan is like “partner” and “them” very interesting indeed
Also love how much he understands Eddie but that’s a whole other story
But yeah what he wants with Eddie stopping the cycle of looking for a mom for Chris and instead looking for something NEW and for himself is just so perfect and exactly what we’ve been begging for
Also I keep seeing people referencing more stuff so if you have specific snippets you wanna send me please do because I think I might not have found all the articles
Ahhhhh and I love having YOU as one of my anons you guys are literally the sweetest people ever 🫶🫶🫶
Lots of love and I appreciate you sm 🥰🫶🫶🫶
#911#buddie#evan buckley#911 abc#911 fox#911onfox#eddie diaz#evan buck buckley#buckley diaz family#asks open#send asks#my asks#send me asks#answered asks#asks#ryan guzman
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as a certified Middle School Teacher, do you have any further thoughts or headcanons on mwpp at that age? because honestly this is a criminally underexplored comedic goldmine.
I cannot agree more! I feel like the first four years at Hogwarts especially have such potential. For gen fics mainly, so it might not be for everyone, might seem boring, but honestly we are writing and reading about a close-knit group of four boys, and by focusing on singular ships only, we might be missing out on so much of their dynamic expansion. I still keep thinking about that snippet of yours about Sirius pyjamas. But then I'm also coming from bands fandom which in a sense is a very similar environment, just a few men closely working and interacting together, plus my favourite trope is (best) friends to lovers, so there's that too. I'm pining for this. AHAHAH
Anyway, enough of my ramble, here I come with some ideas, thought I don't necessarily think they are something people haven't come up with before. To sum up the comical possibilities move from bodily humour to more cerebral one over the years with lots of awkwardness thrown in between - i imagine a lot of hilarious situation happen just by accident.
- ages 11/12 - they are probably extremely random. the things boys that age let out of their mouth, their associations, are just the wildest. the pranking at this stage must have been insane. a lot of body pranking and really dumb jokes. also there was a lot and I mean A LOT of physicality between the boys themselves probably. boys that age won't stop hitting each other, touching one another in quasi-fights, but there's nothing sexual about it. the boys in my class are at it nonstop, however dangerous it is, they keep smacking each other with cushions, slippers, textbooks, with ANYTHING that comes under their hands. they wrestle and pull at each other nonstop. i fully believe the marauders dorm room was a battle ground - this was specifically prominent between james and sirius.
- ages 12/13 - this is the time when most of the boys enter puberty, so all kinds of physical changes you have described start appearing. they start to be more self-conscious about the way they look. as i HC for James to be a little on the vain side, I imagine him spending progressively longer time in the bathroom which might be a source of arguments (that are quickly forgetten) between the boys, they are constantly missing breakfast or well, James is, then he's grumpy because he is hungry. also times of the self-exploration, morning wood, wet dreams, lots of embarrassing moments for everyone. i imagine Peter being on the shy side, his bed has always curtain closed. their dorm room REEKS. Sirius might be the cleanest (pureblood upbringing leftover) lots of mood swings, it's a rollercoaster. a lot of bickering over stupid things. by the time they are thirteen they are a bit more shy with the touch (minus James and Sirius, again I feel like those two would be all over each other because that's their way of showing affection, James is a hugger from home). their pranking would get better, less body pranks, more cerebral pranks. i feel like here Remus might start getting bolder with his ideas. Sirius would get progressively mouthier. bless Mcg and every teacher at Hogwarts.
- ages 13/14 - peek peer pressure. whatever their friends are thinking, that's the holy word. this is the peek pranking time. oh lord, Remus would hardly try to stop them. Peter would take a lot of detention to cover up for James and Sirius. and in general, they would be breaking records in detention. they are extremely aware of their sexuality, lots of lewdness, lots of stupid, inappropriate jokes. All the girls are annoyed by them. this is the time they start smoking if they start at all. sarcasm central! the randomness of their early age disappears - this is when everyone really understand just how smart Sirius and James really are. The third year is the year they are done with their mirrors and they are working on the map. they are bold enough to come up with the Animagi idea. this is the year they are invincible. by the way their room is a MESS - a MINEFIELD. Thank god for cleaning charms.
- ages 14/15 - now this is not very different from the previous year, i just think they get a little bit more organised, especially at 15, and increasingly it's possible to have a reasonable conversation with them. i feel like Remus would be a much more polite throughout the years, with his gratefulness for the opportunity he got at Hogwarts, so the difference would be scarce, the same goes for Peter, but James and Sirius would get much better and stop talking back as much. there's more secrecy in their plans. they also start to need their own space and time. their dorm room is tidier and the curtains are often closed on every bed. but all four of them have their opinions now and much more than before these opinions differ. it's not one brain cell/pack brain anymore. there are more discussions, a bit less pranking, they start seeing their behaviour is not as great and I think this is the time when they really only give a hard time to selected few (aka Snape) and whoever doesn't sit well with them. they definitely don't stop, but before they were much less selective. it could be anyone.
Anyway, this is not wildly specific, more just like an application of my observation of teenage boys. I feel like everyone could make it work in their own way depending on how they see the individual Marauder.
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How would the OL:BA boys be with an MC who struggles with obsessive compulsive disorder?
Author’s Note: I have OCD , It causes me lots of turmoil because it causes me to pull at my eyebrows and eyelashes compulsively and causes me to have unwanted thoughts so this request resonates with me a lot! I hope you enjoy this and even find comfort in this request!
Pairing(s): Cove Holden x MC , Derek Suarez x MC and Baxter Ward x MC
🌊☕️⚽️
Cove Holden🌊
He tries his best to support you and doesn’t bat an eye to any ‘unconventional’ request you may ask him.
You would prefer if he washed his hands as soon as he entered your house? Understandable, his hands are probably covered in sand anyway
He doesn’t get annoyed when you repeat a conversation and he never minds reassuring you about anything.
He can understand the feeling of being overwhelmed and needing to do a ritual to relax a little.
If he sees you doing something compulsively like pulling hair out, cleaning the same spot, rearranging things, or anything like that he would take your hands and try to ground you.
He comforts you whenever you have intrusive thoughts. He knows you would never enact them but he understands that you are scared that you will and reassures you that you won’t.
If anyone even DARES and imply that you are a weirdo or a bad person for any compulsive thoughts or behavior that you open up about, he will not let it go.
The man will have a huge grudge and will rightfully defend you.
Cove gets so annoyed when people throw around the term OCD to describe none OCD behavior and will debunk what they are saying.
And a fun fact , people with autism have a high chance of also having OCD so there is a possibility that he also has it!
Cove is the sweetest man. He never lets you feel uncomfortable or evil about your OCD. There is a reason why it's called Obsessive Compulsive behavior and he will scream that from the rooftops.
Derek Suarez⚽️
An equally supportive man, as soon as you open up about having OCD, he pulls an all-nighter to research more into it to make sure he can properly understand you.
He asks you to list what triggers your OCD or anything he can do to make you feel more comfortable.
Like, if you ever have doubts or concerns about things you are uncertain about (like plans for the next day or school work you forgot the due dates to) then Derek would try his best to help ease your doubts.
Derek is already a pretty organized and clean guy so you don’t have to worry too much too much about him making messes or being disorganized.
He doesn’t mind you needing to close and open a door a few times to feel secure or you checking to see if you left any potentially dangerous things on(stove, open flames, etc)
It pains him every time you feel the need to distance yourself from him because your thoughts won’t leave you alone about hurting him. He just wants to give you a big bear hug and reassure you that you would never do that to him.
He has no hard feelings if you ask him to change out of his outside clothes, considering he’s probably been out playing sports and getting all dirty. He wouldn’t like it if someone sat on his bed covered in dirt and sand neither.
He reprimands anyone who has anything judgmental to say about your ocd and swiftly educates them about how wrong they are.
If he spots you doing a harmful compulsive behavior, like scratching or pulling hair then he tries and grounds you as well but mostly vocally since he doesn’t want to overwhelm or frustrate you.
He hates how taboo the topic of OCD is and opens up dialogues and conversations with his colleagues about it and hopes it can spread awareness of it. He hates how it has been watered down to “I need a clean room”.
Derek will always love you and everything he does is to make sure you are happy!
Baxter Ward ☕️
I am saying this as a Baxter fan but I feel like he would be ignorant about OCD at first. His parents probably raised him with the idea that “depression is just an excuse for lazy people” or at the very least didn’t think mental health wasn’t important. He probably thought the social media idea of OCD was basically what it was until he met you.
He now knows that ocd isn’t just being a germaphobe or needing all your pencils to be pointing the same way.
He asks you to educate him on it, what are your struggles day to day? What's the best way he can support you? Etc.
As soon as you educate him on what he can do better to support you, he instantly gets on it.
He encourages you to open up about what you're thinking about and reassures you constantly that you don’t scare him away with thoughts you can’t control.
He knows in his heart that you would never do anything to harm him or anyone else.
He is concerned about you hurting yourself though. He tries his best and makes sure you don’t do anything that would cause you harm.
Baxter never minds if you need to repeat an action because the first time didn’t feel right. He doesn’t truly understand the urge but he would never put you down for it.
When he does become more well-educated on OCD, he gets very snippy and annoyed when other people are ignorant or rude about it. He has first-hand experience on not being super educated and he knows it isn’t hard to read a few articles about it or the very least contain their mean words to their cruel mind.
He will always be there to support you , if your OCD ever gets worse , like maybe you went through something traumatic or your in an extremely stressful state of mind.
Baxter would kneel on the ground and lay his head in your lap. He wraps his arms around you and tells you that you're more than this and that he believes there is always light at the end of the tunnel.
#olba#baxter ward#our life beginnings & always#orion4ever#gb patch#olba baxter#fanfic#olba baxter ward x mc#olba mc#olba derek#olba cove#cove holden x mc#cove holden x reader#olba cove holden x resder#cove holden#derek suarez x reader#derek suarez x mc#derek suarez#actually ocd#ocd
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This request is kinda angsty, but I was wondering if you'd be willing to write something about Baldwin assisting his wife when she faints from heatstroke on a particularly hot day? She is prone to headaches as it is, and the heat does her no good. Basically something sweet about Baldwing reacting to his wife fainting and helping her recover, if it's not too much trouble... 👉🏻👈🏻
♧ I've Got You - King Baldwin x Reader ♧
♧ Angst ♧
A/N: Hello Anon, thank you for your request. I like this one a lot and enjoyed making it, I hope it's what you had in mind! As always, this is based on the film Kingdom Of Heaven, not the real historical figures. Enjoy!
TW: Fainting, Mentions of Dysautonomia, Leprosy
Summer in Jerusalem was always brutal.
Many were used to the heat, leaving them mostly unaffected. However for y/n, the heat was much more than she could take.
Unbeknownst to individuals of the time, with their lack of medical knowledge, the young queen suffered from dysautonomia, induced from trauma during her childhood.
This meant that severe heat caused her to experience extreme headaches, difficulty breathing, and on occasion, fainting. She was already prone to terrible headaches as it was, so the heat did nothing to help that either.
--------------
On a particularly hot day, Baldwin was scheduled to address his subjects and y/n was supposed to be joining him, as usal.
The king knew of his wife’s sensitivity to the heat and insisted that she remain inside the castle, but y/n promised that she would be perfectly fine and that as long as she stood in the shade, nothing would happen.
This did nothing to ease his nerves. But still he agreed, telling her that if she felt even the slightest bit ill that she was more than permitted to enter the castle to lay down.
------------
When the hour of the address came, the people gathered in the castle entrance yard to hear their king speak of updates regarding the safety of their land.
Baldwin stood on the royal balcony of the castle and y/n stood behind him, with the rest of the royal officials.
About five minutes had passed after he started speaking when the queen began to feel slightly ill. She thought nothing of it and concentrated on keeping herself standing. The heat worsened her small headache to a migraine, her vision was blurry, and she was having trouble breathing.
Still, she told herself that there was only a few minutes left and that she could wait it out.
It was Tiberias who noticed her sickly appearance first. He was stood with the rest of the royal officials and was also aware of the queen's medical condition.
It was for this reason that he had been keeping a close eye on y/n and was also the first to notice her legs give out from underneath her.
He rushed forward to catch her, just before she hit the ground.
Tibarias called for a guard to take her inside. Amongst the small commotion, Baldwin did not see what happened but was quick to turn when he heard a guard being called.
Seeing his wife unconscious in the arms of a guard sickened him to his core. He gestured for somebody to conclude the address as he followed inside, not caring what others in the crowd thought.
“What happened? Is she alright?” he asked Tibarias frantically, his heart rate quickening.
“She is alright my lord” Tibarias replied quickly, “it's the heat, she just blacked out as you were speaking. She will be just alright” his words only calmed Baldwin’s panic slightly.
He felt ill, the bandages covering his body suddenly feeling too tight. The mask restricted his breathing even more than it usually did.
The guard placed y/n on the couples shared bed in the royal chambers.
Baldwin ordered him to fetch the physicians quickly, moving to the queen's bedside to look at her properly.
She was very pale, but her eyes were shut peacefully. Her breathing was soft and inaudible, if it wasn't for the slight rise and fall of her chest, one would assume her dead from the sickly pale color of her skin.
Noticing the king's look of utter defeat, Tibarias offered a few words of comfort, but they did nothing to ease his worried heart. “It's my fault” Baldwin uttered softly, “I should have told her to stay inside. I knew that this would happen. Oh lord, why did I allow her to stay outside for so long in this awful heat”. He sighed, sitting down on the edge of the large bed and putting his head in his bandaged hands.
“It is not your fault my lord. You weren't to know that something like this would happen. She insisted she would be alright, she would not have assumed something like this to happen either” Tibarias replied, placing a hand on the king's shoulder just as the physicians entered the room.
---------------
It was late at night by the time y/n’s eyes snapped open. With a gasp, she went to sit up, but a gentle hand pressed her back down. “Easy my lady, everything is alright” a voice soothed her.
As her vision cleared, she began to make out the form of Tibarias, standing beside her. He wiped her forehead with a cool, wet cloth gently.
“What- what happened?” the young queen asked, struggling to form words with her still dazed mind trying to regain consciousness. “You blacked out from the heat, but you're alright now”. As he said that, the memories began to flood her mind.
Her mind suddenly went to her husband, why wasn't he here? “Baldwin, where is he? Is he alright? I know how worried he gets” she began to panic again, a thousand scenarios flooding her mind about what could have happened while she was unconscious.
A small smile crossed the royal official's face as he gestured to her side with his eyes.
Turning her head slowly, y/n was suddenly aware of a gentle weight on her shoulder. Her mind was instantly put at ease when Baldwin's mess of blonde curls tucked under her chin came into view as well as his arm draped over her stomach. His mask was removed and placed on the side table closest to her. His warmth was pleasant, especially without the cold of the iron mask against her skin.
“He fell asleep at your bedside earlier this evening after remaining beside you all day,” Tibarias explained. “He was so worried about you. He felt awful for having you out there in the heat”.
Y/n smiled softly. She loved him so much and the fact that he was so worried about her and her health constantly, despite his disease, made her love him even more.
Gently, she lifted up her arm and placed it around her husband's back. “Thank you Tibarias. I can assure you that I am fine now. You are welcome to go get some rest” she offered through half lidded eyes and a weak smile.
“Thank you my lady, have a pleasant rest”
“To you as well”.
Once Tibarias left the room, she turned her attention to Baldwin.
“I’m sorry for scaring you my love” she whispered to his sleeping form, pressing a kiss to the top of his head. “Thank you for taking care of me” she said before closing her eyes, finally allowing the pleasant breeze coming through the open balcony doors and her husband's soft breath against her chest to lull her into sleep.
#king baldwin iv#king baldwin iv x reader#king baldwin x you#kingdom of heaven#king baldwin x reader#king baldwin#kingdom of heaven fandom#king baldwin iv x oc#the leper king#kingdom of heaven 2005#kingbaldwin#baldwin iv#baldwin#koh fandom#koh
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How do the girls deal differently with anger? If it's too much, I'm mostly interested in reading your thoughts on Ami, Rei, Makoto and Minako.
Your insights are *chef kiss*.
I REALLY love this question! Srry it’s taken me so long to answer.
First of all I’ll say for all of them, it depends! Is it something out of their control? Cause if not, mf REI HINO does not stay mad about it, Her ass is sprinting to kick the problem’s ass in milliseconds, right along with Mako! But for simplicity sake, I’ll say the reason the girls are angry is something out of their control and they can only sit there and find way to deal with their emotions.. ok. GO!
Ami. Ami stresses, Ami stresses way more than people think she does. I genuinely see Ami being an extremely stressed person, to the point where I can easily see her being the one with the shortest life span. Stress is scientifically proven to have adverse effects on your health.
How does Ami deal with anger? In most situations I think she suffers in silence. She doesn’t ponder too much, she just tries to keep on going like nothing happened, cause the second she starts taking a moment to think about herself openly is the moment she catches herself “being selfish”. People around her don’t need to see this.
Ami is meant to be that one pleasant person you come across. The one to be always kind to you, no matter the day. A silent yet strong and resilient symbol of strength and comfort.
This is obv a very unhealthy mindset, which I can see Ami getting better at as she get older, but not all the way.
She HATES crying, she always has. The lowest moments in her life is where she just couldn’t cope with all her emotions and just broke down and cried, so she associates crying with “This moment is REALLY THAT BAD”, it’s almost a coping mechanism where she sees herself brimming with copious amounts of anger and emotion, yet she’s not crying, so it’s fine, it’ll be ok. The moments where she cried never ended up ok and still resonate with her.
I think Ami also finds small, yet meaningful ways to destress while coping with anger. Reading is a simple one, I think laying on the floor and taking a moment to decompress helps her too, perhaps while cupping her ears and just depriving herself of as many outside factors as possible. Listening to specific genres of music, going through her father’s sketches, and even sharing an intimate physical moment with a loved one. With Ami for me is a wild pendulum between “I need to feel as much as possible RIGHT NOW!” To “I don’t want to feel anything right now”.
Rei. Oh, boi.. Rei, when has Rei ever been angry? LOL Rei is pretty much always angry.. angry at what? EVERYTHING! Angry at the chickens for spreading the feed to the porch, angry at Yuichiro for using the wrong china for tea, angry at the man down the street, angry at the spicy noodles for NOT BEING ON SALE ANYMORE, angry at the nearest pole for standing in REI HINO’s way! EVERYTHING! But she’s right, why? Cause she’s Rei Hino!
On a deeper level, Rei’s anger is mostly directed at herself, it’s like a 70-30 split of Rei holding herself and the world and people around her to such high standards, it eats her alive. She is her biggest critic and that’s honestly why I see her having such a significant ego.. she kind of earns it. She’s so extremely diligent, yet when she messes up or the people around her do, it kills her cause she knows she should do better, she NEEDS to do better and the others need to do better too. Tho their names aren’t Rei Hino, so she can’t expect them to be perfect all the time. Rei Hino though, she’s fucking perfect, so she better not make ANY mistakes and shit, Rei never makes mistakes!
Also Rei lacks the most basic functions of self reflection.. or reflection in general, as well as self-awareness. She doesn’t have high standards on herself to please anyone but herself, so her emotions are more often heightened by the fact that they are not really based on “normal human decency/shame/standards”, but rather based from her own ‘flawless’ logic and standards. So, something so extremely insignificant can be the irrational thing to tip her over the edge to a breakdown.
Her biggest outside source of consistent pumping uncontrollable anger is her father. I really see them as two peas from the same pod, they are both arrogant, head asses who can’t get over themselves to meet the other person half-way. (even tho Rei is way more justified! Cause fuck him fr)
With all that rambling said, how does Rei deal with anger? If Rei is in a situation where she can’t genuinely go and solve the problem herself, I think she meditates. She spends sometimes up to double digits of hours just meditating. In a way the least Rei-like thing to do, but there’s just something so extremely comforting to Rei about it. She can finally detach all of her worries, her judgments and just exist, peacefully.
Mako. Poor baby.. she has dealt with anger issues since such a young age and her coping mechanisms aren’t great. In the best of times they result in: smashing someone’s face open, but if the problem can’t be solved that way… it gets way more complicated. Mako is a very reactive person: you hurt me, I hurt you. That’s her logic, but in a world so complicated how does such a simple creature manage.. poorly I tell you.
Mako does not like being angry, It’s almost shameful for her, especially around her loved ones. She doesn’t understand why she’s so frequently angry and it eats at her, to the point where she’s literally yelling at herself “why can’t you just be happy?!”. Concepts like trauma and mental illness are so unknown to her.. smart people stuff she’ll call it. get this girl a therapist RN!
How does Mako deal with anger? There are many moments where I see Mako being unable to control her anger. Taking it out on objects around her is out the question! She simply cannot afford it, if Mako grips that phone too hard is goodbye to having a phone period… so I see Mako reactively reaching for a cigarette instead. She’s not proud of it, but what can she do? She can get out and go for a run til her muscles ache, but that would expose her to so many outside factors that could risk heightening her anger. A cigarette always helps.. maybe 2 sometimes.
If her anger is not to that destructive level quite yet, she may reach for her mother’s cookbook and set her mind to a nice relaxing baking session or she can reach to that unfinished crocheted scarf and work on it a lil more, perhaps clean the whole living room instead! All activities that bring her comfort, but which are also ways to deal with her anger that would not put her into further trouble.
With her very unstable financial situation I actually don’t see her working out almost at all. She frequents the school’s sport clubs, but outside of that, she can’t just go throw weights around any time she wants. She has school, sailor business, work.. she has no time. Though this is something I see her start doing as she gets older and possible gets engaged into a better financial situation. Outside of physically fighting someone, I don’t see her wanting to let her anger manifest into physical actions (later she’ll learn that’s actually rlly healthy along with speaking about it, but this Mako has never heard of therapy of self-help.. she can barely afford a doctor, let alone a therapist that can tell her how to deal with pain).
Mina! Man.. Mina’s kinda tough. She’s really hard to read and is excellent at masking her emotions. Doesn’t matter how angry she is, if she doesn’t want you to realize she’s angry, you have a very very very low chance of figuring that out and even a lower chance of getting any readable confirmation of your theory.
Much like Rei, Mina is also very self-critical, but not to Rei’s unreasonable extents. Mina is, because she needs to, she’s the leader, the level headed one, controlling her emotions is not a choice, it’s a necessity. Along with that I see her being way angrier at the world around her than any other of the inners, but she’s not hypocritical about it.. she realizes she’s part of the problem. People are so fucking selfish, it’s disgusting, and yet.. she knows she’s not so different.
So how does Mina deal with anger? Ironically enough, I see Mina being the one throwing weights around. Mina LOVES working out, physical activity is her n1 stress reliever. She’s not very picky either, she most often makes do with anything she has at hand, including environments and all types of different circumstances to adapt to the most reasonable and appropriate workout at the time.
Other than that, I can easily see her openly venting to those around her. If it’s something she doesn’t care about you knowing she’s angry about, then you’ll def hear about it, willing or not! That’s the more “friend” part of Mina coming out, and less of her disciplined persona as “the leader”. Different circumstances lead to different ways of coping. There’s a lot that Mina needs to filter between “we’re friends” and “I’m your leader”, and that complex inter-dynamic of her character is one of my favorite aspects of her.
And speaking of public coping method for anger management.. Mina’s kind of a dick too, depending on the day, she’ll go openly be an ass to someone on the street to destress, or encourage Rei in similar behavior. Entertainment is a kind of minor, yet significant way Mina uses to keep her emotions at bay, a form of temporary distraction, and hey.. Mina is pretty shameless after all. She doesn’t care. Also I can see other types of ‘activities’ that are def a personal fav method of coping for Mina as well *ahem*.
#sailor moon#Ask me stuff#ami mizuno#rei hino#makoto kino#minako aino#this was such a fun ask!!#I love these types of thinking sessions#Helps me flesh out the characters more and more#Truly bringing them to life in my mind
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