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bonkingcat · 2 months

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might be a bit odd or a stretch and written poorly by me (sorry if its rambly basically) but mithrun has such interesting but devastating symbolism and importance for a message in dunmeshi.

(TW SA/ABUSE MENTIONS)

the goat (demon) being an abusive relationship that to you who is in it only sees a nice perfect person doing anything for you, only for things to slowly get worse and worse… leading to SA (it’s not actual SA but the imagery has subtle implications of it) and other forms of physical and psychological abuse.

this leaving mithrun in an intense state of depression, ptsd and other issues like getting mana sickness really easily, which is also connected to the physical disabilities he got from said abuse. and due to these states he finds he can not desire anything anymore, he can only feel empty, not even a desire to get help and only feels a strong anger to the person and tries to prevent anyone else from going through the same.

but he’s not a lost cause.

“so.. even vegetable scraps have their uses, huh?”

he blames himself for his trauma, he sees himself as worthless and not one to be desired anymore because of what he went through. and realizing this, realizing that he actually has grown a desire to BE desired even just in a simple way to be needed (helping with falin) he finally can crack through that depression. the ptsd is still there, the physical disabilities are still there, but through surrounding himself with community of people with different views and trauma has helped him realize he is not broken and shouldn’t be blaming himself for something that was out of his control.

he wants to do new things, he wants to live now and it’s so beautiful to see.

plus, as kabru says here how the desires being eaten is not what it seems like is such an interesting fact. sure the demon ate his desires he had in that moment, making him believe he could never desire again but in fact he could get new desires (change/grow/heal) plus, traveling with kabru, he did show desires whether they be small or not.

in this moment he showed full horror about this memory. now if he was loss of desire, then he shouldn’t even desire to feel fear about this right? shouldn’t he only feel anger due to the revenge? which once again, shows his whole healing journey.

he’s such a great character with so much representation, and in turn is also a character that can show hope for someone like thistle who now is going through similar things and is practically hospitalized.

there is hope, you will heal, you are gonna be okay and your trauma is real but it does not shape you as a person, you are safe now.

dunmeshi is such a great depiction of that

#sorry if this makes no sense #please share your thoughts #dungeon meshi spoilers #delicious in dungeon #dungeon meshi #dunmeshi #mithrun dungeon meshi #mithrun #thistle dungeon meshi #dungeon meshi senshi #senshi #anime and manga #kui ryoko #ryoko kui #bladie blog

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seekaster · 2 months

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God the fact that it was Fabian and Gorgug specifically that had that revelation of Kristen’s miracle work is sending me into a tailspin

There’s just something inexplicable and unspoken connecting these three together (that has nothing to do with them being my favorites uh nope) , like, how both Gorgug and Kristen died at the beginning of freshman year, in front of Fabian (twice no less, in Kristen’s case) who to me always seemed uniquely affected by it.

Something about death and resurrections, dark forests and falling, I run up to him, parents loving you too much and never enough, do you remember the first time you watched someone die, legacies and expectations, being the protectors and needing to be protected, keep going, losing and finding yourself again…

#fantasy high #fantasy high junior year #fabian seacaster #gorgug thistlespring #kristen applebees #dimension 20 #text post #sorry if this makes no sense #there’s something here #that I can’t put my finger on

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knightofmarte · 1 month

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So will we talk about Fig and Ankarna? Like how Fig's domain is rebellion and Ankarna's is justice. How we rebel because we see something unfair or unjust and how connected they are. For me it's very possible that Fig is going to be the one to bring Ankarna back the way Kristen brought the Nightmare King back. Fig who has always been welcome in barbarian classes because she understands rage, but still is so kind and understanding. Fig who just brought back one of the symbols of this Goddess, Fig who has claimed her fallen domain or her domain in hell. Fig who gifts her friends and who isn't sure of who she is, Fig who always protects and always fights against things that are wrong. All of this is to say I think Fig is Ankarna's One, even if it's not Ankarna who chooses Fig but Fig who relates and brings back Ankarna. Fig is the Archdevil of redemption, she might as well be Ankarna's Paladin and Chosen.

#fantasy high #fantasy high junior year #fhjy #fhjy spoilers #dimension 20 #just some thoughts #sorry if this makes no sense #english is not my first language

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panxramic · 1 month

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Missa cubito ohmygod today’s stream was SOOO.

Firstly, I haven’t talked about this but the fact that q!Missa has finally accepted the family home as his home too makes me want to snob. The fact that he calls it HIS home too, after spending so long distancing himself and saying that he doesn’t deserve to live with them? It makes my heart spin. And yes he still has his movements of self doubt but he knows now that this is his home and this is where he will always return to no matter what.

And I adore the little things that Missa notices. Last stream he got so giddy over the barrel in the house with his name on it and got so happy that he was included with the rest of the family even if he didn’t have anything in it. And then once again today gasping and getting happy at seeing the barrel again as if it was the first time all over. Missa loves being loved and he adores the little things the family does to show it. And how does he return the favor? With drawings he can leave behind dedicated to each one of them. Because he loves his family and he will find a way to physically show it even if he can’t be awake when they are.

And ohhh today with the cakes. He struggled so much and he lost so much energy trying to make the birthday cake for Tallulah but he would not give up until he got it done for both of them because his kids deserve it. And can I also point out I don’t think he realized it was also Chayanne’s birthday but he still made him a cake because he wanted to give something to his son and not make him feel left out. And when he was making the drawing for Tallulah he would not stop and he would not let ANYTHING distract him because his daughter deserves the world and she deserves the perfect painting.

Then come the raccoons. He goes and helps them clean because maybe he can earn money for the family and help out more around the house -> something Missa has always struggled with. He always wants to provide for the family the way they have him so he goes along with these raccoons. Then it all goes to shit when Bad logs on and he finds out it was his home they were cleaning. He finds the dead bodies and he gets scared because… who is this man he’s been calling his friend? Why does he have a grave of bodies underneath his home?

Missa runs. He tries to run away from q!Bad but he always finds him. And then it gets revealed that Missa was working with the raccoons and Bad backs away from Missa because how could he betray him. And Missa does try to explain it, he doesn’t know what is going on. He’s lost and confused and no one is answering his questions. q!Bad threatens and leaves q!Missa with the racoons just for the racoons to stab Missa in the back and rob him too.

This is when he asks himself, who can he trust? q!Bad isn’t who he thought he was, and the racoons betrayed him. He has considered q!Bad a friend for a long time because he’s always on when Missa is on and is always there to help (though if you ask me I would argue the opposite). He tried finding a way to justify Bad’s behavior, even the stuff chat brings up until he can’t. So, he goes back home and prepares a letter to Phil.

Because he realizes after everything in his life, after continuously trusting and relying on the wrong people, he concludes he can only trust q!Phil.

Missa never really leaves letters. His thing has always been paintings and small gifts. But for the first time (in what might be a long time) he leaves Phil a letter. Now that he’s accepted this is his home, he sees it’s also a place people can use to hurt him, in this case q!Bad.

Notice how when q!Bad came back and said he was gonna prank q!Phil and left, q!Missa immediately ran in to check on the kids? His priority and his fear will always be losing his family. He has spent so much of his life pushing himself a way from them, he doesn’t want to lose them when they’re so so close.

But as always… Missa runs. He runs away and sleeps somewhere else for tonight.

In his defense, I will say that this time it’s different. He’s running to protect his family. Is it the best option? I don’t think so. Missa always has struggled with feeling like he isn’t enough. And in this case, his families lives could be in danger so he runs away, because it’s his fault and he isn’t enough to protect them.

I will say. Things have changed. Because this time around he warned Phil. These two have had SOOO many instances of miscommunication and not talking to one another and we finally have a moment in which Phil is hearing directly from Missa. Not some other character, not his kids, Missa.

And the last thing Missa said when he went to bed. He wasn’t sleeping on a bed, because the only bed he will ever sleep on is the one in his home. LIKE FUCK. Yes he ran, yes he left to protect his family. But that’s his home. That’s where he will ALWAYS return to for comfort and safety. It isn’t a forever. It’s just for now.

For the first time, Missa is certain he will always have a home to return to.

#sorry if this makes no sense #I love Missa cubito so much #I just had to spit this out #qsmp #marv rants #death family #qsmp missa #qsmp philza #deathduo

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devotioncrater · 11 months

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it's. 3 AM so. excuse this post for being A Mess

but someone give jamie lee curtis a goddamn fucking emmy for her portrayal of donna berzatto. holy fuck. the alcoholic spiral, her hot & cold volatile moods, her connection to her boys but not to her daughter, her batshit unhinged behavior, her overwhelming depression...."no one would fucking miss me" "maybe if i took a gun to my head and shot myself" "do you know how much i fucking hate it when you ask if i'm okay?"

she's violent and it's all rubbed off on mikey. she's violent and it's fucked irrevocably with nat's head. she's violent and it's driven carmy away yet left him feeling guilty for getting the fuck out of there.

it's the way the chaos in the kitchen at the Beef was an extension of her legacy. generational trauma dripping down from her to mikey to carmy until the Beef's shutdown death. donna berzatto is entropy in the kitchen — the metaphorical space for interpersonal relationships, for closeness — and she justified the turmoil by the outcome she achieved. the seven fishes. the seven different meals. the ends justified the means, so don't you dare ask if she's okay because look! look! there are seven different meals cooked on the table that she's done! she's a provider all she ever does is provide but does anyone ever pause to say thank you? could a Not Okay person cook this complex meal? she's fucking fine just look at the seven goddamn fishes.

it's all right there in the food, she's burying herself in the food. it's this overcompensation to mask her shot mental state.

"just because i love it doesn't mean i enjoy it" = just because i love my family doesn't mean i enjoy them.

and it's becoming so clear that the gutting of the Beef is a purging of the past. they honor where they came from by naming the new restaurant The Bear, but they will move forward with new tools and a new outlook. it's breaking the messy, toxic kitchen cycle with better equipment and better people and a better foundation. doing it right this time right down to the licenses

#SORRY if this makes NO sense #im just. reallly emotional over this episode #the bear #the bear spoilers #the bear season 2 #carmen berzatto #carmy berzatto #donna berzatto

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karmaramen · 20 days

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the toshiro/laios fight tickles my brain. i relate to both of them and it makes me a lil sad seeing people hate toshiro with such vitriol.

like as an autistic poc one of the major ways i mask is emotional repression. and while im completely oblivious to some social cues, i'm keenly aware of others, to the point where i'll be bottling stuff up and stressed tf out by this weird balancing game!

i innately want to appease people, to the point of playing nice even when i'm uncomfortable. i genuinely want to get along with everyone, but sometimes that's impossible. my nature to try to help everyone can often contradict itself and twist into appearing two-faced or duplicitous.

toshiro doesn't hate laios, but they aren't as close as laios thought they were either. it's not clean cut one way or the other. they fight, they talk—and yeah—its on toshiro to speak up and not make assumptions. but they're able to come to a mutual understanding and i think that's really neat since i resonate with them and my own internal conflicts!

all this to say im gnawing on ryoko kui's writing. really cool stuff going on. the parallels foils and interactions between different characters are so tasty.

#sorry if this makes no sense #or is too rambly or celf centered #i just have lots of Thoughts #karma/rant #dungeon meshi #delicious in dungeon #dunmeshi #dunmeshi spoilers #laios touden #toshiro nakamoto

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violent138 · 29 days

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Dick, tossing his phone to Wally as he grabs his Escrima sticks: "Comms are down, text the rest of the team that we're in deep shit."

Wally, accidentally sending a message to Batman re: calamity: "Dude! Why is Batman on your phone??"

Dick, full of horror as he punches someone in the face: "You sent it to Batman?"

Wally: "I'll fix it, I'll fix it." (accidentally sends an "All good, everything's fine" message to the Titans group chat)

Dick, crashing into a wall: "What's the ETA on backup?"

Wally, seeing Batman's message about being there ASAP and the Titans' thumbs up: "Oh no."

#I'm gonna try drawing this because it would be so much funnier as a drawing but I'm feeling lazy sorry #sorry if this makes no sense #'twas highly amusing as a thumbnail sketch #batman #titans #textpost #dick grayson #wally west #dc comics #bruce wayne #robin dick grayson #kid flash #teen titans

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frownyalfred · 4 months

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OOOOOH CAN YOU IMAGINE the goons that the bats have bitten with too much force flaunting their scars like a fucking trophy between the criminals in Gotham. The more bite marks you have, the more of an annoyance you were to the bat

“I’m gonna find the kid who bit me,” Leo said, brow furrowed. “Little fucker left a nice imprint in my upper arm, see? Don’t tell me they can’t do some shit with that down at GCPD.”

“No one wants to see your gross fuckin’ arm, Leo,” Paul said, shoving at him one-handed. “Put that shit away and pretend like you’re actually looking at your cards.”

“I am,” Leo insisted, lifting his arm higher for the whole table to see. “Saul, your cousin still does that art shit downtown, right? Can he make a mold of this or whatever?”

Saul rolled his eyes. “Sure. Play a card, fuckass.”

“Bite mark analysis is an imperfect science.”

The room went quiet. One by one, the heads turned to the final member of the table.

“What’dya mean?” Leo asked, squinting. “Imperfect science?”

“Bite marks are notoriously unreliable evidence in court,” Matches Malone said, not looking up from his cards. “The science isn’t just imperfect. It lacks a basis in reality altogether. One mold could be evaluated by two different experts and yield three different results, depending on the way they’re presented. Notoriously reliable with juries though. That I’ll admit.”

“When the hell did you become a lawyer?” Saul muttered, eyeing Matches suspiciously.

“You read that in a book somewhere?” Paul cut in. “Lemme guess. You’ve been watching Dateline again, Matches.”

“That show with all the dead chicks,” Leo said, perking up visibly. “That’s some fucked up shit, man.”

“You got me,” Matches said, shrugging. “Still ain’t real. Good luck getting that plastered up, though. I’m sure you’ll catch your bird.”

“Your bird,” Paul jabbed at Leo’s bad arm with an elbow for emphasis. “You some kinda pedo or something? You want Robin over here to kiss it better?”

“Fuck off, man,” Leo said, growing red. He shoved at Paul, fumbling for his cards. “I’m out. Fuck you all too. Fuck kinda shit you mean, have him kiss it better—”

The door to the alley slammed shut.

“Fuck is his problem?” Saul muttered.

Matches shrugged, glancing down at the table. He flicked at the edge of his card with an oil-stained finger.

“Who’s up next?”

#micro fic #treadmill thoughts #sorry if this makes no sense #I was inspired #bruce wayne #batman #dc #myfic #theresurrectionist #robins #dc comics #matches Malone #fic #asks #anon

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starryinkart · 6 months

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Hey so a bit of a possible crack theory:

So in the show, we’ve gotten three solver colors already, Red, which stands for Doll, Purple which stands for Uzi/Nori, Yellow which stands for the solver/CYN. But here’s something ALOT of people seemed to miss. After you rewatch the Season 1 trailer, you realize:

There’s a blue solver, most likely a blue solver holder. Hidden right before the infamous yellow of the solver we’ve come to know in the show.

If you watch the trailer, you also notice something else. Right before this symbol quickly shows up, we have a dialogue from N, running away from Uzi from the scene at the end of episode 2 and then him sitting in front of V being sad. But if you listen to that dialogue:

He says “We can’t be around the workers anymore V, we’re too dangerous…”

He eventually begins to hang around them again, but to me this line with the imagery is super important. We know from the most recent episode 7/8 teaser that N is the actual leader of the squad, most likely the strongest and most likely protected by CYN with her admin right before she was completely lost by the solver.

Through out the show, we see him confused at his own power at points, like in episode 4 when he shoots the arrow through another and catches them on fire, cracking the arrow board, proceeding to say:

“Did I do that?” All confused.

N obviously doesn’t know how powerful he is at all, but what if and hear me out, it’s not ONLY because he’s a Disassembly Drone?

We know that CYN blocked the solver from having access to him, V and J to most likely protect them from the fate the solver has for drones who are infected. She didn’t want the same thing happening to N, her brother, who she loved and his friends which he cared about and most likely she cared about before she was taken over completely.

But now, Uzi has unblocked them from being protected from the CYNs admin, which was presumably protecting the squad from the affects of possibly getting the solver, (under the assumption CYN was bad in general) by becoming their administrator. If Uzi is their admin, and she gets taken over by the solver in general, that means that her admin code basically becomes useless to protecting N and the others from being infected too. And remember Tessa found them in the dump and repaired them as well, like CYN so they have a high chance of contracting the solver since they were also disposed of incorrectly.

So here comes the point of this picture that was released as a teaser yesterday:

It’s N, looking down, whether at something or just on the verge of having a breakdown and losing it we are uncertain, but from the posture, the balled fists, he does NOT look okay at all.

The first thing yours eyes are drawn to are the building split in half in front of him, the exoplanets in the sky and N. But, on a more closer look, you see two things:

1. The snow flakes on the bottom left have a ominous blue tint to them, which should only happen if blue light is reflecting off of them…

2. If you didn’t notice on the first look, N has the same blue light, coming from right in front of him. Perhaps maybe the same color as this blue solver symbol we have yet to see with some weird lines and curves jutting out from the sides…

At first, I thought Khan would be the blue solver holder at the beginning of the series, being a surprise twist for him to have activated in him he was so afraid of due to him possibly seeing it with his wife Nori. Honestly while that would’ve been cool, episode 5 debunked this possibility, since Khan was flung out of the room by Doll when she was attempting to get the cyber bug from Uzi. Solver owners can’t effect other solver holders as proven from the series, it can only use items around them to throw or hurt them.

We haven’t seen N be affect by the solver once in the present time or in the flashback of episode 5.

Now I do know the merch video came out today, but it was stated in the video that

1. “It was totally not canonical to the series what so ever” which I HIGHLY doubt. Most of the merch and videos we have seen have been canon and it seems as though the characters have been pulled aside between episodes to “film” these fourth wall breaks.

2. The fact that the title of the video “N’s Final Form” and the thumbnail are most likely not just a joke. Notice his acrylic stand teaser from V’s acrylic stand released recently:

When I first saw this, it looked SUPER weird. Me and my significant other said it looked like N and we thought the two things in the foreground of his body were his wings, meaning he was looking away from the viewer of the stand.

But then we looked closer and I started looking at my King Solver N design you can find in the murder drones link in my FAQ and we drew a more accurate picture of what we were seeing. N was not looking away from the viewer, all the characters are looking at us, and it would be weird to have N be different. So this is what we came up with:

W stands for his wings, T stands for where his tail is, L stands for his legs, F stands for his face and H stands for his hands.

His hands look a-little weird don’t they?

Remember this:

It was mentioned some where on Tumblr that this looks similar to the cocoon that Uzi broke out of in Episode 4 when she transformed into her solver form only N is being dragged in. This is obviously a biomechanical phenomenon of the solver. But why is he being dragged in?

To have his “final transformation” , a “final form” you may say?

The only thing is, after Uzis transformation, is when the solver really started to gain power over her, taking control of her as seen in Episode 4 and recently in Episode 6. As soon as she became biomechanical, the solver gained more control over her.

(Edit: sO this cocoon theory was wrong, but his emotions can still spill over and cause this!!! So its not fully wrong yet!)

Now think of the scene above and what happened to Uzi in Episode 4, but with N. N gets dragged into this cocoon, fighting but not able to escape, while Uzi is fighting inside her mind with the real solver, posing as CYN in the mansion as Uzi is trying not to lose her mind. While she’s stuck, N has his transformation, now not able to be protected by CYNs administration since Uzi is now the administrator of him and V, so he undergoes the transition, the solver not having much to fight against converting him to a biomechanical creature like Uzi. This gives it more power over N, and gives it a chance to take advantage of the situation to bury itself into N’s code, making his solver string: true. Now N has the same thing inside him that has possibly taken everything from him.

After this, he either gets possessed fully and goes on a rampage or the possession is slow, painful after he manages to escape the cocoon and get to the surface. Either by this point Uzi is still fighting in her head and N thinks she’s fully gone or dead OR she has successfully fought the solver and is looking for N. All his repressed emotions, everything that has happened, everything he’s lost…it’s all become too much. He snaps, lashing out on whatever is in front of him, this being the building we see in half in the teaser from yesterday. Before he can stop himself, he angrily swings toward the building, but instead of a sword, his gun or his claws coming out, there is this fleshy, gross growth that emerges, a blue solver symbol appearing in front of him and shooting towards the building, snapping it in half like a toothpick.

There is a moment of either him stopping in pure panic due to this OR his panic, sadness and fear turns into full on anger, him not able to repress anything anymore, taking a turn into a full on uncontrollable breakdown. The reason he had to repress his emotions for all this time, for fear of lashing out and hurting the ones he cares for. But now, as far as he knows, no one is left to care for. After all in the merch teaser today Uzi said really sarcastically:

“You’re meant to be better than us! Don’t become swallowed by the darkness/animal based merchandise (murders) like I have!”

And

“HIS EMOTIONS… CAN NOT BE CONTAINED!”

(which can be very much true)

This could end in either him being used by the solver as a host or Uzi coming back to help him and in turn as he said in the teaser:

“Okay I’m back! I’m better and it’s even deeper down now….haha! “ (basically his repressed emotions being repressed further for an even worst breakdown in a season 2)

That’s one turn it could take, but another could he that when he stops from pure panic due to what he’s become, similar to Uzi, and in the merch trailer today, and realizes he can use his newfound powers to save the ones he loves that are either left alive or find another way to fix what has happened.

(Someone mentioned on here that N’s solver powers could be similar to Time-travel to places he’s been to in the past, (like Dolls in teleportation to only places she has seen and Uzi doesn’t really have one yet, she’s not that far along in development of her solver) to go back and correct what mistakes he has made, fixing the timeline and THAT would be super cool if he does think he has lost everything or really has. If it ever find it on here again, I will tag it.)

Sorry this was SO LONG, but basically, N will have the blue solver due to the final two episodes and he will get a transformation like Uzis, having him grasp the thing that has basically ruined his life several times over being apart of him now, having to use it to save his loved ones. All the while not having a mental breakdown or angry blowup and losing control of his powers. So basically affecting the story and his choices greatly.

#murder drones #I spent an hour typing this #at a soccer game #it’s okay if this isn’t true #when the episode releases #but it’s all good #ALSO I GOT the Uzi sweater #and N pin #I’m getting the rest of the merch #and the N doggo #murder drones theory #sorry if this makes no sense #it’s a rant #starryrants!#starrywrites!

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