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lost-in-lamentation · 11 months

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a/n: oh, how good it feels to be writing again. welcome to my corner; i hope you enjoy your stay.

content: the poor brothers need your presence. you/your pov. gn!reader x lucifer, mammon. (separate). 1.5k words.

warnings: the kitchen almost catches fire. the boys cry just a lil. mammon has some doubts about himself. (also, proofreading does NOT go brr, we die like men.)

there were so many things that could weigh down a poor demon’s mind; brothers who lacked self-restraint, and others who had too much of it. there was paperwork to be finished, and projects to be refined. games were made to be finished 100 percent, and books were written so they could be read front to back. money was for spending, and food was to be devoured. lipstick was made to leave marks on mirrors, and of course, pillows were fluffed up so they could be flattened at night (and during the day, in some cases). so many problems in this world for few people, and yet, for all said problems, there was only one cure. you.

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lucifer.

the silence that came from the kitchen was unsettling. lucifer had already warned you not to disturb his cooking duties, but his anger be damned. you were worried enough that he looked like he had been awake for 4 days straight, and a mess in the kitchen from a sleep deprived demon was not what you wanted to see. not to mention, beel’s stomach growled louder with every passing second. if you were going to deal with an angry demon, you’d rather risk lucifer’s stone cold gaze than beel's hunger pangs.

“lucifer,” you called as you pushed the door open. “beel’s getting… restless.” your words trailed off as your mind attempted to unpack the scene in front of you. there was no mess, which was a relief. however, there was a fire in the pot on the stovetop. the eldest of seven only stared at it in silence. “lucifer!” rushing over, you snatched the lid of the pot before moving it off the heat and attempting to suffocate the flame inside. eyebrows furrowed, you turn to lucifer, slowly waving a hand in front of his face. his red eyes were glassy, holding no light in them. “lucifer,” you repeated for the third time. concern took root in your stomach when he still made no effort to move. after a few moments, you left his side, calling satan to finish cooking duties while you manoeuvred the avatar of pride up to his room. the thought of lucifer being mad that you dragged him around bounced in your head briefly before landing in a soft cushion you liked to call denial.

shaking off the idea, you sat lucifer down on the edge of his bed, bending down on one knee to take a clear look at his face. softly, as though you were cradling a swan made of glass, you placed his head in your hands, thumbs brushing over his cheeks. “luci? come back now, it’s just us.” you had done this before; the last time you witnessed it happen was after lucifer had come home after an argument with diavolo about RAD. a stack of papers on lucifer’s desk stole your attention. with pursed lips, you moved one hand away from his face and slid it onto his waist. “what’s diavolo got you up to now, hm?” your thumb pressed gently into his side, and slowly, you began to see his eyes focusing onto yours.

when he finally came to, his sigh of relief and the way he pressed his cheek into your palm did not go unnoticed. “MC. i apologise, i haven’t been in my right mind these days.” as quickly as lucifer had searched for your warmth, he pulled away from you, one hand brushing yours away from his side.

“you’re telling me,” you chuckled, leaning back onto your heels. “you know you almost set the kitchen on fire?”

the avatar of pride was not feeling very prideful at the moment. “it was strange.” lucifer decided to have a staring contest with the floor. “i knew i had to do something, and yet, i couldn’t bring myself to move.”

your breath hitched in your throat when you saw the first tear slip away from the corner of his eye.

“it’s even more strange,” lucifer whispered, voice threatening to break at any moment, “that i would allow myself to feel so vulnerable around my attendant.” his knuckles turned white from how hard he clenched his fists. lucifer threw his head back, a pained laugh echoing through the room, painting the walls with desperation. you could only wait for his next words with your heart in your throat. when he brought his gaze down to meet yours, a perfect, fake smile overtook his expression. “MC,” he said softly. you waited in silence.

“MC,” he cried, throat tearing at the seams.

acting quick, you moved to envelop him in your arms, one hand pressing into his back and the other running through his hair. you pushed against him, forcing him to lay down. when you both hit the bed, lucifer immediately sought solace in the crook of your neck, his hands grasping at the back of your shirt as sobs wreaked havoc on his body. you responded by pressing your cheek onto the top of his head. “i’m here, lucifer. i’m not going anywhere.”

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mammon.

“yo, MC!”

“mammon?” light flooded into your room against your will, forcing you to squint and continuously tap your night stand in search of your d.d.d. 1:37am. “gods, it’s almost two in the morning, mammon.” you huffed in annoyance, throwing your d.d.d. onto your pillow before falling back onto the bed and drowning yourself in blankets. “at least close the door if you’re gonna stay here,” you groaned.

“okay, first off.” mammon huffed right back at you as he closed the door, “we are in the devildom, there are no gods. second-”

at the second eldest’s remark, you grabbed your free pillow and threw it at his face. “fine, fine. DEVILS, it’s almost two in the morning.” mammon let out an unrefined squawk when the pillow made contact with him. you could barely stifle your laughter underneath your comforter.

“MC, you aren’t funny.” mammon yanked the covers off your face, and it was only then that you saw the annoyance and misery etched into his expression. you decided not to ask about it directly, instead choosing to wonder what mammon wanted to say second.

raising your hands in defeat, you gave mammon a sympathetic look. “i think i’m pretty funny, but whatever you say.” the avatar of greed sent you an unimpressed glare before moving to quite literally sit on you. “oof- mammon! you’re heavy, get off me!” mammon’s shoulders bounced with laughter briefly before he slid off your stomach and into the spot next to you. “ugh. anyways, what were you gonna talk about earlier?”

“oh, yeah, get this.” mammon cleared his throat as though he was about to tell you the greatest story ever. that’s what you wanted, at least. it’s not what you got.

“so i was over at the fall, right?” humming your acknowledgment, you turned onto your side so the two of you were face to face.

“there was this crew of demons, they were all wearing matching jackets and everything. it honestly looked kinda strange, but everyone else there was totally raving about them. i have to admit, their leather jackets looked like they were high quality too. definitely not the ones you could find in those small clothes shops.”

“are you going to spend the whole night fan-boying over them?” you murmured, a hand reaching up idly to play with the hair that draped over mammon’s forehead.

he scoffs in indignance at your reaction. “oi, shut it. and stop playing with my hair, you’re distracting me.” you hummed again before dropping your head and allowing mammon to continue.

“so, basically, long story short, i think they were some sort of gang. asmo warned me about those when at the fall, didn’t think i’d ever see them myself. but then, they came up to me. and can you believe what they started saying? they were acting all high and mighty, sayin’ stuff like, ‘oh, it’s just the second born. the scummy one.’ i don’t even know where it was coming from!”

slowly, you moved your hand closer to his own, tapping your fingertips on his. as if it was second nature, mammon grabbed it immediately, fingers intertwining and fiddling as he continued to speak. “i mean, can you imagine? saying all that about THE great mammon? it’s not like they know me, right? they don’t know what it’s like being second after lucifer. they don’t know what it’s like to actually fall, right?” mammon stopped playing with your hand, opting instead to look you in the eye. “right…?” he practically whimpered the question under his breath, gold eyes turning to sapphire as the tears began to well up. “please, MC,” he begged, his breaths becoming more ragged. “they don’t know, right?”

you felt your heart sink at the question. with a nod, you opened your arms to him and pulled his trembling frame into your embrace. “they’re just jealous, mammon. they don’t know you at all, and everything they say is wrong.”

mammon’s arms tightened around your back, his breathing shallow and his tears never-ending.

“don’t you worry about them,” you whispered into his ear, your hands slowly working their own kind of magic along his back. “everyone that should know what you’ve done for them already knows.” mammon released a sob into your shoulder before trying to press further into your touch. you didn’t stop him. “after all, you are the great mammon, right? you may be the second brother, but you’ll always be my first man.” a shaky laugh replaced his cries briefly, and you couldn’t help but nuzzle your face into his hair in return. “that’s my mammon,” you purred softly, holding him close until he fell asleep.

and that's it for first post. hope you enjoyed it if you're here at the end ♡

#obey me #otome #obey me mammon #obey me luficer #obey me mammon x reader #obey me swd #obey me luci x reader #obey me comfort #obey me hurt/comfort #obey me fluff #aris writes 🐈‍⬛

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spookykoolkat · 8 months

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the red j.m. | chapter four

CHAPTER FOUR: NO GOOD

series masterlist | main masterlist |

previous chapter | next chapter

pairings: older!joel miller x plus sized!younger!reader

chapter summary: you've been in jackson for a month now and things are still a little rough. you haven't found the right crowd to fit into yet, and thought maybe you might have to settle for the family of four you already know, until you meet your patrol partner, tyler. unfortunately, joel doesn't seem to like the idea of you with any other man but him.

warnings: 18+ age gap (joel is 57, reader is turning 26), inappropriate thoughts, sexual language, teasing, touching, slight jealous!joel, x-rated descriptions, crude language, perv!joel, creepy!joel, mean joel not too mean tho, MDNI!!!

wc: 6.2k

na: HI! thank you for alllll of the love oh my god my little gothic heart is so full i love you guys!!! i hope this series is everything and more to you guys bc i love this so much! hopefully as chapters go by, i get better in my writing and hope everyone enjoys it! i appreciate all of your kind words and interactions with me and making me feel welcome since i am new to writing on tumblr and kind of took a six year break from writing oneshots/fanfictions LOL. anyways please enjoy this chapter things are g3tting a little hot and heavy :P I CANT WAITT i hope that my writing is cathartic for my big girls we do not get enough representation for us in stories and writings!please enjoy! smut coming soon fr fr LMFAOO

i appreciate all reblogs, likes and comments feel free to do any one of those things or ALL! if u think its deserved :P

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DECEMBER 21ST, 2024

YOU

you’ve been in jackson for a month now. you couldn’t believe it, you truly had every doubt about staying even a week. but, it’s probably the calmest life you’ve lived in a very long time. you enjoyed it and you truly felt you’d made the right decision, it didn’t take much convincing either. but, you still haven’t unpacked the items maria gave you and continues to give you. just in case.

the neighbors are learning your name, as you are with them, and they actually care. as much as you let them. you felt quite bad because you found yourself still not clicking with anyone around you. and you’ve tried. the people your age find you boring, almost a dark cloud over them, bursting their bubbles. younger kids only approach you because of ellie, asking for advice on stance and grip. the older group, around tommy and joel’s age, finds you a bit much.

your language, your lack of social awareness–sometimes it gets embarrassing. saying something old heads wouldn’t necessarily like, being too blunt and a little explicit. joel figured you should hang around your age group, yet you didn’t really click in with the rest. he was far from embarrassed being around you, you just said the things he was thinking out loud.

you only found yourself clicking with joel. in many ways, as much as he let you. he was standoffish most of the time, barely cracking a smile at your weird habits and the noises you make when you’re passed out on the couch. he refused to let you break him, this wall that he had up to survive. do not get attached. he thought, maybe the less he knew you the less it’d hurt to have anything happen to you. but it seems even as little as he does know you, he’s still feeling that tug at his heart laying his eyes on you.

it was too late. whoops.

joel doesn’t want to address that feeling, and he doesn’t want to call it as it is. he actually cares about you. he had no choice but to call it that, because why else would he lie to you about finding cassettes in the house?— so that you didn’t know what he really did to get you whatever he could get his hands on.

he didn’t want you to know that he actually smuggled in goods that he and his family needed, and while bribing, stealing, trading and selling for necessities, he made it a mission to find at least one cassette tape for you. he didn’t know you actually saw him red handed, and you still didn’t know where those boxes were coming from. he figured if you knew, you’d bring it up.

he made it his mission for two whole weeks, after your first week of staying with him, and finally got his hands on some actual music for you. joel hadn’t made efforts like this in a long time, and he knew that denying the fact that he at least cared for you would mean he was being delusional.

but he was always worried about you. you were his object of affection and he craved to find a way to get you out of his mind. he actually felt guilty for thinking about you in ways you’ve probably never been before, he felt guilty for wanting nothing but to make you feel good—however that was.

you doubted it strongly of course, shaking the feeling off as your own delusion and insanity, but you always hoped. hoped that maybe his generosity and southern hospitality was actually him caring about you in a different way, but he was a grown man. you tried to off yourself in front of him–you were insane to think he’d even look at you as anything but a liability, he hardly looked your way as it was.

at least you thought so.

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joel paid attention to every single thing he sees and hears. he doesn’t show it, he doesn’t acknowledge it—all he does is observe. some more than others.

you didn’t talk to him unless he talked to you, you kept your distance like he wanted, but somehow he knew everything that was going on. he didn’t have to talk to you to know you, and that’s what he was ashamed of. he watched you.

he was a creep, he felt like someone who was abnormal and making things weirder than they had to be. he was studying you and you didn’t even know. he picked up on what made you smile, which cassettes you listened to the most, which just so happened to be the ones he was ‘holding on to.’ and in the midst of observing you, he checked you out any time he got.

when you weren’t looking mostly, but even sometimes when you were talking to him about something not so important. he realized that if you did see that his eyes wandered over you, you were probably gaslighting yourself into thinking he wasn’t doing exactly what you thought he was doing. he loved your body. and he loved the way you dressed your body, the way the shirts you wore always clung to your heavy breasts, how even when you dressed in baggy clothes he still wanted to ruin you like that.

sick. you’re a sick old pervert, ya kno’ that? he knew. what joel didn’t know is why you made him feel this way, why you drove him to do the things that he does for you. why he acted feral every time you bent over, why he would storm out of the room when you got on your hands and knees to pick something you dropped up off the floor.

but he also studied you because he wanted to make sure you weren’t feeling how you felt the night you woke up in jackson, to make sure you weren’t feeling depressed or like you didn’t want to be here anymore. just talk to her fucker. he couldn’t. he would never admit it, but he’s eavesdropped near ellie’s garage to hear conversations between the two girls.

“ellie, i mean it, you cannot tell joel.” you hushed as you glanced towards the door, back to ellie.

she scoffed. “like i’d tell him, lay it on me.” you noticed the irritation in her eyes when you brought up joel, asking yourself if maybe there was something that wasn’t being said. you just put a pin in it.

“okay. one, i’m finally allowed a gun and i got my patrol route.” you cheered in a hush and joel almost pressed his ear into the door.

ellie rolled her eyes, grabbing the piece of paper. “no fucking fair. good looks, telling me bad news first. what’s two?” she joked.

“i met my patrol partner. his name’s uh, tyler? i think. yeah,” you looked down and nodded, assuring yourself. joel made it a note to tell ellie how thin her walls were, not right now though.

“tyler… tyler m?” joel thought of every man in this town named tyler with the letter M as his last name. instantly made a mental list of five tylers.

“i don’t know. but he asked me for a drink. tonight, he was gonna meet me here but i told him i’d meet him there. lesson number 5, always have a way to leave anywhere you are if you need to.” you said. you figured it’d be best to teach her as much as you could, telling her things she needed to hear to survive.

that’s how joel knew immediately what was happening when he heard your soft singing from your cracked door. you were getting ready for him. he actually hated it. he couldn’t remember the last time he felt that heat in his chest, biting the tongue—it wasn’t until his face turned down into the old familiar feeling, what he recognized as jealousy.

who was he to be jealous? for what? it was a saturday night, most people were off of work, and everyone was settling in the town’s circle to drink and watch movies. everyone but joel. he was now classified as a bitter old man, with a dark whiskey in his glass. maybe now a bitter, creepy old man as he knocks slightly on the cracked door and you invite him in.

you were fixing the laces on your shoes, simple black converse, and his eyes made his way up from there to your face. a deep v neck shirt that looked like a second skin from how tight it was, and faded black jeans with tiny holes from being lived in that hugged the fat of your thighs. he never noticed the gold dainty necklace that sat in the middle of your chest, but it sits right between the curves of your breasts. were they always that big? he felt like a kid, ogling and asking stupid questions.

“hellooo? joel?” you called to him as you rested your palms on the width of your thighs. he saw your lips, coated in a sheen and your hair split down the middle instead of being in a pony tail or bun. creepy old man. you’re being creepy joel!!! he shook his head.

“headin’ to the circle?” he asked. if he were close enough you could smell the whiskey on his breath.

“yeah i-,” you thought for a minute. joel didn’t trust the next person as much as you did. you saw his protectiveness through ellie, you felt maybe he’d feel the same for you. even if you were a bit delusional.

“-was gonna catch a movie with ellie, most likely be back around 12.” you said as you glanced at the clock, 9:32.

“‘s that right?” he said suggestively, like he knew something you didn’t. he did.

“yeah. that’s right,” you stood firm, even shot him a dirty look. “why don’t you enjoy the night, joel. you got the house to yourself, ain’t that what you’ve been mopin’ around for?” you stood up and grabbed your gun to put in your waistband behind your shirt, sticking a knife in your high top converse and one in your jean pocket.

maybe you got too defensive, but you were right in a way. he looked miserable around the house, storming in just to grab a beer and lock himself in the library or room.

“that’s right,” he was just smug. so smug you couldn’t stand it, you wanted to slap him.

“whatever joel,” you wanted to be right so bad. you wanted to prove to even yourself that you were right. but neither of you were buying into this act you played, and you knew it. he was making you nervous with his stare, the hard shell you had was practically ripped off of you when he grabbed your wrist before you left the room. he held you, shoulder to shoulder and looked at your face, down your neck and to your chest.

“if you need anythin’, you let me know darlin’.” darlin’? it was so foreign to you, so alien that you didn’t even have time to process it before your mouth moved to say a small alright and taking your arm from his grip. when you did, it was cold and you could feel the print of his hand around your wrist down the stairs.

it was so different, something that leaked off of his words when he spoke to you. and you wanted to hear more of it, explore that with him.

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before you could psych yourself out of going through the bar’s doors, you heard someone call for your name and turned your head to the left to see tyler, walking towards you with a big grin on his face. tyler was just two years older than you, someone you met while you were in combat and patrol classes, and didn’t acknowledge until he approached you, re-introducing himself as your partner for the first two weeks. you couldn’t be cold and shoo him away, you just smiled and introduced yourself, really looking at him.

he was not joel miller. tyler’s skin wasn’t as tan as joel’s but he wasn’t pale, and he was actually a bit lanky even under the thick coats he layered. you noticed that his chest wasn’t as broad and strong as joel’s, hell his arms were smaller than yours. he was a skinny tall thing, while you were a bit short and thick everywhere. and when he embraced you lightly at the entrance of the bar, you just felt cold. no warmth, no comfort, you felt like you’d break him.

“hey, i was hoping you’d actually come.” he breathed in as he pulled away, still, it wasn’t feeling right.

“why wouldn’t i?”

“cause you’re out of my league,” he said with a seductive smile and you wanted to believe him. wanted to enjoy the night as it comes and maybe have a few drinks, talk. but your mind was on a bitter man who sat in a house all by his lonesome.

the thing about ‘dates’ now is that small talk doesn’t happen anymore. what’s your mom like? she’s dead actually. really? mine too! it was pointless. if you ended up here, you knew that you were alone.

it wasn’t long before you and tyler were sitting on two stools, side by side. your knees were in between his as the two of you talked, flirted, gave simple touches. you were having fun. doing what would seem normal at a bar, just enjoying the company of someone who actually liked you.

“how come you’ve never hung out with anyone else? i never see you with anyone.” he said, his fingers tapping on your knee.

“mmm, i’m just not for everyone.” you flirted, covering his fingers with yours. you knew this wasn’t going anywhere, but you’d like to live in it just a little longer. the touch of a man, someone who desired you even if it wasn’t how you wanted. something you started to crave from joel.

“maybe you’re just for me then?” he suggested, and you decided to just play into it. it was kind of hard not to when you were thinking of joel, you needed to act out on it.

“i doubt that, honey,” you said, tugging at the collar of his shirt. he smelled like tequila and grass, something not that appealing but you ignore it. you wanted something out of him tonight, because for some reason the words joel spoke to you kept ringing in your ears. if you need anything, you let me know darlin’. the words rumbled through your body and straight to your core, because if there’s anything you need he could definitely be of help.

you didn’t know how long you stayed at this bar, teasing and touching each other until you felt the ache in your core, aching for a touch that you’ve had once before. but you didn’t give a shit about purity or virginity, you wanted the ache gone and you knew tyler was the best bet.

“tyler,” you whispered in his ear as the bar started to empty.

“yes, beautiful?” he answered and slid his hand up your thigh.

“show me how good you are with your fingers, yeah?”

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he followed you back to joel’s, hand in hand as you turned the key to the house and softly opened the door to prevent the creaking. granted, you didn’t think this through, like everything else. maybe you should’ve gone to his. you cringed a bit, walking inside.

it was dark inside, nothing but the sizzle of a freshly put out fire. you put your fingers to your lips to shush him, taking him slowly upstairs and to your room. you couldn’t help but find yourself glancing at joel’s door, which is cracked open.

you finally made it to your room with the lanky man groping your body and trying to slither you out of your jeans, letting him.

“only want your fingers, okay? if not you can leave.” you established as you stood in your panties and tight shirt.

“fuck, yeah that’s okay,” tyler himself was craving a woman’s touch, he didn’t even care if he got off. he just wanted to see you, a woman’s body, to feel you.

“can i touch you? like anywhere?” he asked as he sat on the edge of your bed, his cock already hardened against his pants. it didn’t sound right coming from him. you wondered what it’d sound like with the texas twang you craved to hear from a certain man.

it still made your core twinge a bit, remembering the last time you were this vulnerable. you couldn’t lie, even if it wasn’t what you wanted, you fell in to the odd touch of the man desperately trying to touch you.

“anywhere. keep your dick in your pants, i’ll touch as i go if you want me to.” you moved over to him and crawled into your bed, and he slipped in next to you as he propped himself on his elbow to look at you.

“you’re so pretty, really.” he said, genuinely and you smiled. your stomach even fluttered a bit. it’s been a long time hearing that, hearing desire.

“touch me, please.”

tyler took his time, a little more than you’d liked but he was busy distracted with the way your tits pushed up to your chin, like you were suffocating. touching and teasing, his touch felt good but it still didn’t feel right, it didn’t feel heartstopping. maybe you’re expecting too much.

but he didn’t talk to you when he dipped his hand in your panties, you just heard his whimpers and panting as he rutted his hard on into the side of your fat thigh, barely focused on you. you weren’t feeling it anymore, your wetness wasn’t even directed towards him really. everything you did with him was what you wanted to do with joel. you weren’t interested anymore and it started to feel wrong, it never felt good because tyler wasn’t worried about you. just his nut, and you didn’t like that. you didn’t like to feel used.

“okay, wait, wait—i said wait!” you said and grabbed his wrist, pulling it from your panties and moving off of the bed.

“wait, fuck i’m sorry, i was just so, fuck i’m so sorry.” he said a bit loudly, and you swore you heard a creak in the hallway as you moved to the door.

“it’s okay, i just, i’m not–i’m tired. i think you should go.” you said, hugging your arm as he adjusted himself in his pants and got up.

“i’m sorry, i,-” he tried again and you waved him off.

“it’s done and forgotten, you didn’t do anything you were just really into it. i wasn’t.” you were careful with your words, not as tough as you would be because you’re vulnerable. but he wouldn’t get far if he hurt you, you knew that.

“i’m sorry, goodnight. can we kind of like, forget this?” he asked rubbing the back of his neck and you softly laughed.

“forget what?” you smiled and he returned it, giving a small kiss on the cheek before he left. he was a nice man, a good kid, and he meant no harm. he didn’t need a ruthless beating or yelling, just needed to tell him it wasn’t meant to be. you couldn’t shake the feeling of how wrong it was, how wrong it felt being tyler touching you.

you knew who you wanted to touch you. as sweet and kind and charming tyler was, he wasn’t what you wanted. the man you wanted was across the hall from you, on the other side of the stairs. sleeping, maybe.

you knew ellie was at a friends house doing only god knows what, so with the hope in mind that joel was asleep in his room, you trotted downstairs braless, and bottomless. you were still in the same tight shirt you left in, but now just in the pink panties that were apart of the gifts maria got you. just new/traded clothing you needed. the shirt hugged you and cut off at the dip of your curve, the fat of your tummy slightly protruding between the shirt and your panties.

you didn’t look towards the fireplace where the sofas were, instead you grab a small cup and let faucet water pour into it, taking a drink.

“work up a sweat?” a deep southern voice said behind you, from a distance. you jumped at the sudden break of silence and turned quickly to the sofas.

“joel? what the fuck,” you breathed and stepped out to walk to the sofas. somehow, you completely disregarded the fact that all you had on was a shirt and panties, standing in joel miller’s living room.

“what made you think it was a bright idea to invite a bastard in my home like that? not only that,” he said. you finally saw the light from outside shining on his face as he stood up, something glimmering in his hand. a gun. “but letting him touch all over you? that prick?”

you had a lot to say, a lot to yell out. but the only thing to say was a snarky comment. “you know he called you the same thing.”

which, he did. but you were too drunk on the flirting and drinks to care or to know why, even though you already knew. joel wasn’t nice to anyone but ellie. tommy and maria even think he’s an asshole, but that’s tommy’s brother and maria’s brother in law. he’s family. but there were things that you didn’t know about joel miller. things he didn’t want you to know either.

“why do you even care? who’s touching me, i mean.” you scoff, feeling less embarrassed about your state of clothing. but being a lot more aware as he steps closer and closer to your curvy figure, putting his gun in the waistband of his sweatpants.

he was intimidating like this. towering over you with his fists clenched, searching your face for something. you felt your heartbeat pick up as his eyes raked over you and fell on your lips. he was drunk off of you, the sight of your fat cunt only being clothed by a single piece of fabric drove him to dig his nails in his palms. the nakedness of your thighs, and the midriff showing—it was going to kill him.

“if you’re gonna fuck these town folk, make sure it ain’t in my house.” he spit, and you just rolled your eyes. you felt like you were in trouble for sneaking out, like a teenager.

“i didn’t fuck anyone. we didn’t do anything. he wanted to, i didn’t.” you defended, feeling small now but still holding yourself tall.

joel just looked at you, not wondering if you were lying or not. he knew you weren’t, he heard it himself the minute he heard something bang against your wall. it was just you shuffling to get up, and he heard you consoling him. you weren’t satisfied.

“why’d you lie to me? bout’ seein’ him tonight?” he asked, your head tilted up to his as he steps one step closer. your chest is almost touch his, and your breathing was getting heavier.

“figured you wouldn’t trust him,” you said, sounding like you wanted to say something else but keeping it to yourself.

he was watching you like you were his prey. like you were something he wanted to take and devour for himself, like you were something for his eyes only.

“smart girl,”

“he touch you wrong?” he couldn’t help but ask, the curiosity killing him slowly as time passes with you standing in front of him with your tight pink panties on. he looked down between the two of you and saw the hardened pebbles that were your nipples showing up through your black tight shirt, down to your tummy that was pressed against his. he liked the softness of your belly, he was practically dying to grip it himself. he wanted to grip every part of you, to palm your pussy and feel how warm you were in his grip. he even found himself hating his own mind as thought of what your pussy would look like sucking him in.

“i, he,” you were stuttering, embarrassing yourself as his hand trailed up your arm, thinking of all the ways he could watch you take his cock for him.

you watched him watch you. how his eyes went dark again, how there was a slight touch of possessiveness in his voice. you didn’t assume though.

“can’t find the words, hm? he wasn’t makin’ you feel good?” he asked softly, watching as you closed your eyes and breathed through your mouth, opening again to see a small grin playing on his lips, his head tilted to the side. his fingers barely left your wrist, and made their way to your fleshy hip, tapping against the bare skin. he was enjoying this. making you squirm. making you nervous.

“fuck off, joel,” you meant it to come out a lot stronger than it did, even you thought you sounded needy. “s’ none of your damn business,” you spit, stronger this time.

and before you could even wallow in your retorts, a smile tugged very faintly at his lips. you weren’t so convincing when you were practically trying to pull him to your body with your fists buried in his sweater. he appreciated the effort though, he's never met someone with as much bite in their bark as you.

he just liked to watch you writhe for him. you wanted to whine with how eager you were for him, how mean he was being to you for no reason. you needed him.

“it’s like you’re not even tryin’, what’s the matter? do i make you nervous sweetheart?” he gleamed in his power over you, the way your eyes searched for him and your mouth parted, just for him. he wanted to ruin you in every way. ruin every man for you, show you how to truly be taken care of.

"go fuck yourself," you retorted and he actually laughed. and he laughed at you. a sudden heat rushed to your cheeks, embarrassment filling you.

“i didn’t tell you but,” he paused as he leaned into your ear, grazing his cheek against yours and smiling to himself, “you looked real pretty today, ya know that? you look even prettier like this, all flustered for me.”

you had to be dreaming. had to have gone to sleep after tyler left, and this was your wet dream making up for it. there was no way you were this exposed to joel and he was practically pressed up against your body as he told you how pretty you looked. you couldn’t speak, your tongue was tied and joel smiled to himself as he realized he got you to shut up.

“would ya let me touch you, sweet girl? maybe you'd be nicer if someone knew how to touch you,” he asked, his fingers playing on your hip.

you still couldn’t answer. it felt like a trap, like if you let yourself give in to his words, every guard you put up was pointless. you were frozen, and suddenly felt insanely vulnerable but his voice was so inviting, so impossible to not fall into.

“touch me where?” you asked, treading lightly. you wanted to hear it, you wanted him to tell you he wanted you as bad as you wanted him. you wanted to prove to yourself that you hadn't lost your mind yet. but you also wanted to stretch whatever this was as long as possible before you find yourself on your knees for him without even asking.

joel felt like he was out of his body. like he was watching you squirm and move under his presence from above. he was so distracted by how hard your nipples were rubbing against him that he didn’t even notice your fists balled into his shirt, trying to take him in closer. maybe it was the alcohol he drank to ignore the jealousy he felt, or maybe it was the fact that tommy came to tell joel about the boy you were seeing. how the two of you were practically on top of each other before he left, how he was touching you in public–he was angry.

nothing was done, nothing more than joel grabbing your almost bare hip and you tugging on his shirt, but it still felt like something that was crossing a line. a line you wanted to cross.

until he got the courage to grab the hand that was buried in his sweater, taking it in his own and touching you with your hand. he was answering your question. his hand ghosted on top of yours as his eyes watched your eyes train on the sight between the two of the bodies, enjoying how soft and pink you look. you were hot and bothered, and he could get used to seeing you like this.

“first place i’d touch you, baby,” he breathes, his lips practically against your cheek now. he was breathing you in, drinking you in, “is right here,”

his hand guided you to cup your mound, angry that it wasn’t his hand touching you. your breath was shaky while you watched him, your eyes flickering from his moving hand to his eyes, and every time he made sure your eyes latched onto his. he wanted you to know how much he was enjoying teasing you like this, he wanted you to remember the way he looked at you while you panted against him.

“but like this, lemme show you ‘xactly how i’d touch you sweetheart,” he was lost, drunken only on you, ignoring the world around him. “don’t think that boy would be enough for a woman like you, ain’t that right?"

he took his own hand as you were still pressed against his front, his lips now teasing the skin of the crook of your neck and starting to pull your panties away from your skin to dip his hand inside. your breathing was uneven and your soft whimpers were getting louder the more he trailed down into your underwear, and he was loving them.

the second he felt the scruff of your unshaved mound, he heard you release a shaky, sexy breath, and he grew harder against your bare abdomen. even feeling the heat of your skin on his clothed cock made him want to get on his knees and worship you.

"needy little fuckin' thing, that desperate for me huh? you gonna let me feel this pretty pussy how i want?"

he was so fucking filthy. so filthy for someone who hasn't even seen you naked, so filthy for someone who didn't even talk to you before this. it was agonizing, you were melting into his harsh words and wanted to listen to him make you feel small like this all night.

"joel, i swear," you warned as his breath hit your lips with his eyes on yours.

you had a bush, he thought to himself. he really didn’t think that would turn him on of course, but now he pictured you standing in front of him, bottomless. how your belly would look with your curves, the way your breasts would rest at their natural position, your thighs fat and wide all for him, and the pretty fat mound waiting for him to feel and taste. worst time to think all of that of course, because it sent a flood of blood and excitement to his groin, giving him another thing to be nervous about. but god did he want to see it, see all of you laid in his bed, and tugging on the thatch of hair on your mound. he was fucked.

and god forbid you figured out that he’s been picturing you bent and folded in every way just so he could reach to the back of your cervix, if you figured out that his anger towards you is pent up sexual frustration because every time you’re in the shower, he’s thinking of the way you looked lathered in soap, waiting for him to join you. he was a sick man to think of you like this, but all of his desires and fantasies were threatening to barge in, to unleash all of his wants and needs to you.

he was fighting himself to be a respectable man, a man who doesn’t think of women who were young enough to be his own kid in ways that were sinful. he shouldn’t be wanting to fill your throat with his cock when you smart mouth him. he was losing whoever he thought was himself, and letting heart and cock do his thinking.

you couldn't think right, nothing was processing as you felt the heat of his hand on your cunt. you felt another wave of pleasure hit you and suddenly, you could feel your wetness pooling for him in your panties. you had a hard time wrapping your head around the fact that joel actually wanted you too, even if he wanted to put you in your place for once and shut you up.

you didn't care how he wanted you. you were a bitch, but you were desperate for him.

"mmm, you're real scary, baby, threats ain't gettin' you anywhere. you have t' beg me for my fingers," he teased, rubbing the hair on your mound.

"oh fuck off, i'm not begging you for shit," you're putting up a fight with yourself, and you were winning. at leadt you thought so. even if you were letting him touch you this way, you weren't goping to beg him or give him the pleasure of watching you submit to him.

"yeah? maybe i'll jus' make ya," he grinned, his sinister smile forming while he rested his forehead on yours, his hand inside your panties as the two of you watched him tease your lips.

the second joel’s finger moves from your hairy mound to the fat lips of your cunt to spread and feel just how much you ached for him, to tease your hole so you'd be sent into a fit of desperation, the two of you heard the doorknob jiggle and a loud laugh from the outside, meaning it was ellie. joel pulled his hand and body away quickly and nodded upstairs with a hard look, giving you the hint to go before ellie saw you in your panties.

your face expressed everything to him, you needed him. and you didn’t want to let go. he watched as you walked up the stairs, your ass practically eating up the fabric of your panties. it left nothing to the imagination and he groaned, something you swore you heard, before he fixed himself in his pants.

ellie walked in, and you stayed at the top of the stairs out of sight to hear the lecturing.

“are you outta your damn mind, ellie? it’s three in the mornin’,” his paternal instincts were coming out, and you smiled.

“i was down the street. relax, i just didn’t want to stay there.” ellie defended as she slipped her shoes off.

“did somethin’ happen? are you hurt?” he asked quickly, examining ellie to see if he saw blood or cuts anywhere.

“jeez, no joel lay off. why are you up anyways isn’t it like six hours past your bedtime?” she scoffed, annoyed at the father figure lecturing her right now. what was he gonna tell her?

“was waitin for your friend to come home, so i can lock up before bed,” he lied. he was lying and you knew it. you came home an hour ago, and he was still up.

“you’re in love aren’t ya? old man,” ellie teased. her demeanor was a little more playful than she’d been this last month and he shook his head annoyed, but to you it was silent. your lips pinched into a thin line as you heard joel grunt.

“go to be ellie. now.” he ordered and she rolled her eyes, saying her good nights and going to the garage to sleep in her space.

a part of you wanted joel to come upstairs, into your room and to do everything he wanted to do. you didn’t know exactly what he wanted to do, but with the touching and flirting he was doing, it seemed like he wanted you. maybe he was drunk, you could smell it on his breath! he seemed pretty sober talking to ellie. you cursed yourself as you moved quietly to your room, leaving the door cracked open just in case.

but nothing. you heard him trudge up the stairs, and walk directly the opposite direction into his own room. you were frustrated at this point. sexually frustrated if you must say, and the ache in your core was not leaving any time soon.

you felt embarrassed, and you felt like joel was toying with you. all of the sudden this comes up and he's trying to finger fuck you in the living room when you genuinely thought he didn't even acknowledge your mere existence. it was so confusing for you, but the only thing you knew for sure now after a few weeks of deciding is that you craved joel miller.

it was a weird feeling. only because growing up in an apocalyptic world as a teenager and a young adult meant your chances of love and relationships were slim to none, at least for you. but you met joel in times where you had given up already.

as you lied in bed, wondering if joel was asleep or thinking about you too, you felt silly. you were setting yourself up for disaster by having hope that whatever this was with joel was more than that, and not just that. you worried you were getting ahead of yourself, maybe you were taking joel's advances too seriously. what if he just wants an easy fuck? nothing serious, something for pleasure in this dark world where everyone seeks a way to alleviate their pain

you felt like maybe you were geting into your head like you always do. maybe this could be good. maybe this could be your chance to let go, be vulnreable again, let someone make you feel like a teenager again. you had your fair share of crushes when you were in the QZ, you remembered that innocent feeling of liking someone, the shyness that came with it, how nervous you got around them. and with joel, you felt that times one hundred.

the flutters in your stomach, the goosebumps on your skin when he stands too close to you. he made you feel good even without trying.

but nothing good comes from joel miller.

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sunnydaze4ever · 7 months

Text

Qiu Lin x Reader

Flowers

Romantic, fluff

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Ever since your very first day in Golden Grove, you’ve never seen many flowers. The few you’ve seen were more warm tones. The forest was beautiful, you knew that for sure, but not much floral accents.

Another thing you’ve noticed since you first arrived in Golden Grove was Qiu Lin. Qiu was charming, beautiful, and overall friendly. And it caught your eye. Since around then, you’ve had a small crush on the brunette. And, so far, you haven’t noticed the reciprocation. Its been you, Qiu and tamarack. Not just you and Qiu… yet.

Today there were no plans with Qiu’s club, or foraging with tamarack, or unpacking to do. It was just an empty Saturday. You were sat on the curb, occasionally looking up at the sky. You subtly played with an orange leaf between your fingers, but not much else. Soon you heard boots stepping on the concrete roads. You move your gaze, catching sight of one of your neighbors, Qiu. The light autumn sun illuminated his hair, catching the dark brown perfectly.

“Hey, (Name)!” Qiu called out. You looked towards his hand, noticing light red petals. You spot his usual smile, charming as ever. Blood went to your cheeks, which you hoped wasn’t noticeable. They held out their hand, showing a red Gardenia in his palm. It was pretty and truly fit the autumn colors illuminating the world around you.

“What’s this for Qiu?” You asked, looking away from the flower and into his eyes as you stood up. That wasn’t a good idea if you were aiming for getting less flustered, as when his charming eyes caught yours more warmth went to your cheeks.

“I saw it in the forest. It reminded me of you! And I thought it’d be nice to give to you, since you only moved here recently…” Qiu explained, putting it into your cupped hands.

You weren’t aware that being a new kid wasn’t the only reason. It was more so Qiu’s hidden crush on you that fueled that decision, along with how much it reminded him of you.

You looked down at the flower again and smiled. “Thanks, Qiu!” You said with a smile. Even without knowing the reasoning behind this gift, the gesture caught your eye. You rubbed the petals lightly with your thumb and a smile on your face. “I better go home now, Qiu. Moms making dinner soon.” You walked to your house, careful of the blossom in your palms. Once home, you’d find a way to preserve it. One thing you were sure of is that the new house felt even better with the beautiful flower inside, a sign of your hidden affections.

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Thank you for the request @boa-hoa ! Sorry it took so long for me to finish it!

I choose Red Gardenias as it means secret love between two people (if google is correct-)

#our life #our life now and forever #qiu lin #x reader #qiu lin x reader #Qiu x reader #our life x reader #our life now and forever x reader #step 1 #requests open #romantic #fluff #our life fluff

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alyjojo · 1 year

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PAC - Your True Soulmate 😍

There is a LOT to unpack in this reading, we have 7 Piles to hopefully have a broad spectrum of different layers and personalities. I’m not personally a fan of small pile PACs like 3, it’s harder for me to resonate to when it’s so general, WHY make it easier? Go big or go home! Bahaha. I haven’t started yet, so by the end I’m sure I’ll regret this 😁 I’ve got color cards, charms, my new Creativity Oracle which I am just in love with, the whole shebang to get as many details as possible. Not everything will apply to any one person, so just take what resonates for you and leave the rest for whoever they’re for 🙏

Pile 1: Raindrops 🌧

4 Wands - Knight of Wands - Page of Coins

Regarding: 5 Pentacles

Dreaming Way: Dog rev & Ring

Oracles: Partnership, Push & Flash

Possible Signs: Taurus 💯, heavy fire 🔥 Capricorn/Aquarius with The World, Saturn & Star, Gemini with The Lovers, twice

Zodiac Message: North Node in Taurus

- Have faith in your beliefs by making the right connections.

- Do not worry about the costs of the idea in question.

- Now is the time to use the most direct way and get your ideas going.

Charms:

Bat 🦇 on Flash

Rocking Horse 🐴 on 5 Pentacles

Saturn 🪐 on The World

Diamond 💎 on Salmon Chairs

Key 🔑 on 4 Wands

Color Card: Salmon Chairs 🌷

“Come sit in my chair and feel my love”.

People, places and events are being drawn to you beyond your wildest imagination. Aim higher, for you will draw even greater experiences into your life. It is time to step up to the next level. All “things” are energy and will be drawn to you when you allow your energy to grow. The Salmon Chairs is being brought to you as a gift, to raise your faith and self esteem. It is a gentle and profound change in the way one relates to themselves, and the world. We create the life we feel we deserve. Often we feel we must do something to prepare, yet Salmon Chairs says “Stay in the light of truth, meditate, and relax - if you drink in the light and allow spiritual wealth, you will be surrounded by material wealth.” This is about subtle action, and receiving is an action. You are being told to sit still and receive the bounty that is coming to you. Salmon Chairs can also signify a love relationship in the wings, it’s your choice to receive it. It may also be a present relationship that’s moving to the next level, both spiritually and physically.

This person has very heavy Taurus energy in this reading. Even Salmon Chairs describes the energy of an Empress, which also applies to Taurus, and the North Node described here. This person will have been through some trauma or traumatizing experiences by the time you meet them. With all of the Knight and Page energy, you could meet them young, or they experienced a lot of pain while young, there’s definitely some level of trauma in this person. I kind of expected that sort of personality to come out when I chose the rainy picture, and you also may be able to relate to this person in that way. There is some level of abandonment and loss with them, they may have lost a parent, a friend, a child…can be literal or they can’t access them somehow or they may have abandoned their own child, maybe put one up for adoption or has gone through abortion due to xyz reasons. It happened to them or they did it themselves not fully aware, either can apply here. This can also just describe childhood trauma, but the rocking horse here points out a child specifically. It’s possible they’re taking care of an older child that’s lost a job, or they’re living with a child for that reason. Struggles are where they are when you meet them or a big part of who & where they are & have been.

It’s possible this person is divorced or separated from someone when you meet them. With Dog 🐶 being rev next to Ring 💍 it shows a lack of loyalty, not being able to be trusted or to trust someone else. Someone was not faithful, possibly them. They probably married very young, if married at all, rushed into it, and back out. It’s also possible they’ve done this to you, 2 Cups comes out with The Lovers, and The Star is here, there is definitely a Twin Flame dynamic with this person for someone. If so, they may have lost your trust in the past and it’s valid, but yes they are your soulmate and yes they’re coming back around. With North Node being Taurus, South Node would be Scorpio, whether that actually applies or not, it shows that while young there was more of a death & transformation dynamic to this person, disloyalty, lies, leaving things behind and avoiding the long term, future planning, or solid & stable connections. The path they’re heading towards is Taurus, stability, family, security, the home, long-term. It’s been a long process of maturing/healing for them, or will be.

These are lessons this person has to learn. With Bat 🦇 on Flash, they’ll be tapping into their intuition and may not be able to explain how they know something, but they’ll know. You may move very quickly with this person, moving in together very soon, possibly even getting engaged quickly as well. The Key being on 4 Wands can be a home, it’s like once this person knows what they want, there’s NO stopping them. Diamond 💎 on Salmon Chairs shows them as receiving bounty, money, being very successful, which is something new to them and there could be traumas relating to that too, that are healing over time. They have regrets about the past, whether they did things or had things happen to them, they aren’t totally healed when you come in but they’re heading in the right direction. There is something here about them holding back where their dreams are concerned, you could be helping them “push” towards that too, or you inspire them to take action.

Pile 2: Sunset 🌅

Ace of Pentacles rev - 4 Wands - Ace of Cups

Regarding: The World

Dreaming Way: Clover & Mountain

Oracles: Accomplishment, Secrets & Recycle

Possible Signs: Sagittarius 💯 Pisces, Capricorn & Scorpio

Zodiac Message:

Sun - Sagittarius - 9th House

- The creation of insights to understand spiritual values.

- The gaining of respect for or from the wisdom of long-range thinking or travel.

- Things brought to life or light resulting from the understanding of what is to be shared.

Charms:

Starfish ⭐️ on Wheel of Fortune rev

Sword 🗡 on Ace of Pentacles rev

Axe 🪓 on 7 Cups

Card Guard ❤️ on Knight of Wands

Sagittarius ♐️ on Sagittarius 💯

Rose 🌹 on Recycle

Color Card: Charmaine Chartreuse 🗣

“I never met a person I didn’t like.”

Charmaine Chartreuse suggests you begin finding the good in others. So much is lost when we do not appreciate those around us, for we lose the wonderful gifts of who they are. Appreciating differences will enrich your present situation. This can be a warning that you’ll lose a valued relationship if you do not appreciate what you have. Thinking the best of another person is more powerful than putting them down. Do not attempt to choose sides. Getting others to agree with you that someone else is wrong will also backfire, you may find yourself alone if you are not thoughtful. Wasting energy focusing on something you shouldn’t is also denoted here. Gossip is an indication you’re not focusing on your own life. What we think may not be the truth of the matter. Be aware now of how you speak of another, for the things you say will come back to you at this time. “Doing your own thing” may leave you lonely, and an aloof attitude may lead others to believe you don’t like them, when that isn’t true. If you’re feeling cut-off, consider that others may be waiting for you, and take a cue from Charmaine, being kind is called for from you, even if others are behaving in an inappropriate way.

This person is so clearly Sagittarius in energy that I’m kinda shocked to be honest. I knew that just with the tarot, three Sag cards, then came the zodiac message of the SUN in Sag and in Sag’s natural ruling house no less, and to top it all off, a Sag charm just in case anyone was confused 🤣 OK THEN. A major Sag placement 💯 There are other signs here, definitely more subtle, but this person *embodies* Sag energy in some way. I did notice Pisces here, slightly, but especially in this recycle card, the imagery is a Bird in the Sky and a Fish in the Sea, and I immediately thought of one of my favorite movies of all time, Ever After 🥰, and the line “A bird may love a fish sir, but where would they live?” It could be you that has Pisces placements, for some of you anyway. If not those specific signs, then the dynamic of one person initially doesn’t put many boundaries or standards in the first place, and the other person doesn’t know how to respect them even if there were, makes light of them or turns it into a joke. Initially.

This person pisses you off. You’ve wasted a lot of time on them, or you feel like you have. If they’ve tried to get at you before, you could feel they have, because forget it. In typical (not all) Sagittarian fashion, this is a typical (not all) “fkboy/girl” personality. They’re definitely a wanderer, they’ve traveled around a lot with whatever it is they do, maybe with their family. They could be foreign to you, a different skin color, nationality, speak a different language, something about them could be in stark contrast to whatever you are, which is something Sagittarius and the 9th rules. Culture! Long distances. Foreign contacts. If they’re not a Sag they could just be different. There is a feeling of freedom with this person, they won’t be tied down, no one has managed to…until you, and it won’t be easy. Or hasn’t been. One way you’ll know who this is, you’ve had to let them go before, or you did because you simply weren’t interested in all this.

Eight of Cups rev shows them making a return to your life, could be because they’ve lost a job, a home, an opportunity of some kind that’s out of their control (or destined). Wheel of Fortune rev can show bad luck, but they’ve got Clover here showing that’s not a regular thing and may be a destined/karmic event of some kind. Probably to get to you! Whatever *your* energy is, you don’t take this person at all seriously, they’re like a thorn in your side and you don’t trust them as far as you could throw them. Justifiably. But the passion is LIT 🔥 and the emotions are there, you want this person to BE trustworthy. This whole reading shows it takes effort, they’re a bit of a “project” emotionally and love is not really their forte, but they are your soulmate. They may have never even really been in love before you, or at least not in any similar sort of way. Love as a whole is not their first language.

Axe on 7 Cups is cutting off all of these other options they may have, ex’s that are “friends” or former flirty options, FWB’s, that sort of thing. The cute little Card Soldier on Knight of Wands is you having to be like absolutely not, you’re setting boundaries, and you’re not about to let this person near you period on some player bs. It turns them on, they like your boundaries, they aren’t threatened by your standards, it’s like a challenge to them & they know you’re right. Which is appealing, no? This person is going to change for you, or grow up more like. Maybe not the first time you interact with them, with there being an energy of “coming back”, but whenever they do, they’re ready for you to set your terms so they can follow along. It seems like they will only want you.

With Clover & Mountain this person could be pretty earthy and practical along with all of their natural luck, they are very clever at getting over or through issues that seem insurmountable, nothing seems to get them down or knock them out for too long, they’re a “winner” type of personality. Accomplishment reinforces that message, they could have several. Secrets feels more like past things they don’t want to talk about, not necessarily secrets *from* you. They’re just not interested in past stuff, they let it go so you should too, to them. Rose 🌹 on Recycle is them having made mistakes, broken hearts, losing and winning and learning their lessons. Starfish ⭐️ shows regeneration on a situation or relationship gone sour, it will get better. GREEN dominates the reading visually, it’s a color of grounding & practicality, and there are many plants being shown which all show growth. They’ve made mistakes, they’re learning or have learned, and will be ready for you when the right time comes.

Pile 3: Classic 🤓

Page of Cups - 8 Cups - 8 Swords

Regarding: Justice

Dreaming Way: Fish & Mountain

Oracles: Timing, Reflection, Time

Possible Signs: Virgo, Cancer & Pisces likely, Leo & Capricorn possibly

Zodiac Message:

Jupiter - Cancer - 9th House

- Learn or teach your feelings as if it or they came from God.

- Be positive about attitudes from the past about the philosophies and laws involved.

- Grow and expand, use your intuition and do it in a big way.

Charms:

Dead Tree 🍂 on Demon Red Rainbow

Peace ☮️ on Justice

Stallion 🐎 on Mountain

Peridot 💚 on The High Priestess

Color Card: Demon Red Rainbow 👹

“The greatest adversary is the one living inside of me.”

If the Demon Red Rainbow speaks to you, it is an indication that you are starting to (or will) forge ahead on the path you have chosen. You are correct in thinking that this path is important. Demon Red Rainbow denotes miraculous changes which lay ahead but not without your dogged determination. If you are facing a hill that appears insurmountable, this card reminds us that most true adversaries are the ones inside of us. Life always turns for the better when we face our demons.

You are not to abandon your focus no matter what comes up. The direct route may be the best way to the other side of your fear. There is a crucial lesson here for us all. Know that Spirit always provides an ally when we face the Demon Red Rainbow. It will be clear to you who they are. You need not face anything alone. Spirit has chosen a very powerful lesson for you so that you may teach others what you have learned. A gift of this kind is never given without our ability to use it.

I was afraid of this one coming out, and with the classic image too ha, surprise! We follow no preconceived stereotype here, this person is the mess, at least out of the three done so far. And any of you dealing with them are a saint. Or maybe a Cancer, that’s the only sign that might put up with it 🤦‍♀️ No offense, it’s saintly in its’ sacrifice. For some of you, this person is locked up, in jail, for who knows how long? You might. For others, this person is a train wreck you’ve had to separate yourself from. Demon Red Rainbow comes out to show they are their own worst enemy, and the “dead” tree charm shows that so long as they’re standing in their own way, there can’t and won’t be any growth in this person. Mountain and Horse shows them as a wild personality, one that can’t be tamed or restrained, and they create their own Mountains, dig their own holes, which they later fall into and need help escaping. Presumably, from you. Similarly, the Fish next to this Mountain shows an addictive personality or someone who doesn’t know when to stop, they’re excessive with everything they do, however that applies to them.

The thing that will change this person, eventually, is probably spiritual in nature, but I don’t think you’ll have anything to do with this. And while this IS your soulmate, that’s what this reading is, this is the kind of personality that myself and literally any other tarot reader would tell you to just keep moving away from. There are other soulmates. Your personality and vibe is heavily that of a “fixer”, and these signs could even be your signs more than theirs. It honestly feels like a reading that is more “I see you & you are heard” but this person is a lot to deal with…

You cannot miss anything that is for you. Right now you are not speaking to that person and Justice is here showing it’s the right thing. They may have asked you to wait for them, or you’ve done this to them, and there is no energy of that happening. There is no progress, no movement, it’s very difficult and may last a very long time. Again for someone there’s an energy of actual prison time being done and if that’s the case, you’re not expected to wait. They did the crime, they serve the time, go live your life 🙏 ALL of their oracles are about time. And more time, and more time. The longer the two of you spend apart, the more they have to look at themselves in the mirror, reflect, and realize where they went wrong, how they need to change, all of the could’ve, should’ve, and would’ve energies that you need them to see.

They’re conflicted because there’s no communication. You’re conflicted over this same reason. Neither of you wants to be alone, but neither of you can grow how you need to without this separation. There is definitely a pull here, but the love is only a Page, it’s not the whole thing that you deserve. In time, they will heal, and change, and calm down. Mature. Grow up. In time they may be perfect for you, and this could definitely be a Twin Flame 🔥 sort of connection for those waiting around on the runner to stop running. Peace ☮️ on Justice is “someday”. 5 Wands with Justice is right now. When it comes to Twins I’m a fan of saying don’t wait, they’re a waste of time. It’s a cute dream, and a big maybe, but you’ve only got one life, many possible soulmates, and there’s always the chance of meeting someone brand new ❤️ As much as this person matches your heart & energy, only you match theirs too, it’s their loss. If you’ve picked another pile, please pay close attention to that one as well, from this point forward I’m calling this the “stagnant Twin pile”. Whoever you had in mind, whoever you know fits the bill. It’s a maybe, someday, if you still want it. IF. Yes they will change. With time. Time. Time. More time. Good grief. Lot of time. But so will you. How it stands right now, it’s like loving a wolf that means to bite your face off. You have to worry about you 💯 I hate that there’s a dud for an option, but some must need to see it, or it wouldn’t have come out.

Pile 4: Doorway 🚪

The High Priestess - Page of Wands - 9 Cups

Regarding: 4 Swords

Dreaming Way: Dog, Clouds, Snake

Oracles: Flash, Wish Granted, Truth

Possible Signs: Leo 💯 Sagittarius, Libra, Capricorn, possibly Pisces with 9 Cups and all of this moon energy, the dreamy vibe is strong

Zodiac Message:

Jupiter - Leo - 5th House

- Learn or teach leadership with the trust of a child.

- Be positive about the creativeness of fun, romance, and making art.

- Grow and expand, do what you want to, and do it dramatically.

Charms:

Fractal Moon 🌙 on Electric Blue Moon

Angel 😇 on Page of Wands

Leaf 🍁 on Truth

Pearl of Wisdom 🦪 on Ace of Swords

Sailboat ⛵️ on 6 Swords

Color Card: Electric Blue Moon 🌚:

“If I don’t take care of it, it’ll never happen.”

It is not time to force an issue. If something feels important to you, you may be jumping the gun. If you are impatient, you may block something wonderful from coming to you. Now is not the time for a rushed decision, even if you think you’ve given something “plenty” of time, give it more. You have made your needs known to Spirit, now leave it alone. If you try to force a situation, you may bind yourself to something you could come to know as a hinderance. Allow right action to happen in its own time.

Though Leo is the most obvious here, even with the oracles, it’s definitely muddied with water energy. Both 💯 The Moon is as magnified as The Sun. Actually more so, The Sun is reversed. This could be literally Leo with heavy 8th/12th House placements, especially The Sun, one that doesn’t “shine” so brightly because they’re very daydreamy and kind of lost in another plane, or very spiritual. Or have heavy watery placements. It may not be Leo at all and that sign is being shown as The Sun, this is this person’s identity & who they are. Leo shows up with the 5th House, it’s natural ruling house, showing this person as FUN, artistic, very creative, working with children possibly, regardless of sign. They’re not dumb, nor misguided, and they don’t need someone looking down on them. Who they’re meant to be IS a dreamer, a teacher, a spiritualist, possibly an artist, someone in the more creative fields. With Dog, Clouds, and Snake in that order, who they are is a very loyal, giving, loving, friend, a ride or die kind of person, they don’t see the dangers in other people, the “snakes”, and in this way their head is in the clouds. That’s where the Pisces energy is stemming from strongly, whether they actually have that or not, they are an idealist above anything else, but they’re not lost to reality either and with Ace of Swords are actually quite intelligent. Just not suspicious? They’ll protect someone else before themselves 💯 And because of that, are often taken advantage of, and it does not and will not change them.

This person has big dreams they don’t act on, and amazing abilities of manifestation that they don’t use. Not yet. They have many options and they know it, but they’re more of an indecisive type and aren’t in any rush with Temperance. This is a “create the vision in your head” sort of person, and while Page & Knight of Wands are both here, they do take action, it’s not until their vision is complete. Definitely an artist/creative mentality. With 4 Swords & The High Priestess, either you don’t yet know this person or you do but you don’t really talk to them. With 5th House being highlighted and a lot of this younger energy, 9 Cups, it’s possible this is a single parent or someone that has children already. Or that’s their job, maybe something they definitely want. 10 Pentacles being reversed here shows they are not a conservative sort of person, they don’t want traditional…anything. Marriage. Jobs. Life. It’s not their cup of tea 🍵 They could have already been there done that, and are divorced, or come from divorced parents that make them not interested.

That doesn’t mean they’re opposed to love, they’re just not someone that’s locked in a box and expected to stay there, they like to move around and explore their endless options. Again, a dreamer. They’re very excitable, probably love to travel, and their dreams are more important to them than any “relationship” though that isn’t to be mean at all, I get no “mean” vibes from this person, they would probably encourage everyone to do the same. You want to go to Europe? Go! They have an encouraging & supportive energy, a hype person, a loyal friend 💖 The only thing that holds them back is a lack of confidence, and putting in the work necessary to achieve whatever their dream is. I don’t get they’re afraid of work or don’t work, I think their dreams change before they get there, and they switch tracks a lot. Or talk themselves out of things. It could be other people around them put them down or talk them out of things too, which is difficult for a loyal person like this, they may be losing opportunities or sitting on them due to negative people with no creative vision telling them they “can’t” when they absolutely can. The Boat on 6 Swords can show travel as part of their dreams or this may be how you know/meet them, they may travel or move unexpectedly, more than once even with 2 Pentacles, they don’t tend to stay put, and again 10 Pentacles is rev, they’re not the type to even want to. There’s always more to see & do.

The Fractal Moon on Electric Blue Moon shows something is in motion where their dreams are concerned, maybe meeting you is part of that, but there are a lot of options and details involved in what they’re doing, many layers, as also shown by 7 Cups. They’re waiting for something, patiently. Leaf on Truth and Pearl of Wisdom on Ace of Swords are very similar, they can dream a dream and get lost in the practicalities or reality of taking action, that may be where they’re stuck right now, but both of these charms are encouraging, they’re getting somewhere with what they’re doing. Growing & learning 💯 Flash and Wish Granted are also very encouraging, they will be inspired or get their answers, and though things may seem like they take TIME, once it’s moving it’s like lightning. Stop. Stop. Wait. BANG, and they’re there, they’ve done it, and no one was even paying attention. That’s a Uranian/Aquarian quality which is here lightly, which would support a Leo rising, or Uranus may be a strong placement, or conjunct something strong in your own chart. They will surprise you.

Pile 5: Hands 🙌🏽

5 Cups - The Emperor - The Empress

Regarding: The Hierophant

Dreaming Way: Coffin, Bear, Scythe

Oracles: Innovation, Obstacles, Details

Possible Signs: Aries & Scorpio 💯 Leo, Libra, Virgo, Taurus & Pisces

Zodiac Message:

Mercury - Aries - 10th House

- The awareness of energies to meet the challenges of your destiny.

- Many thoughts about or from your desires regarding where you’re going.

- Many words resulting from the honesty and strengths of your career.

Charms:

Angel 😇 on Bahana Beige

Black Cross ✝️ on The Hierophant

Sword 🗡 The Emperor

Virgo ♍️ on The Empress

Starfish ⭐️ on 10th House

White Heart 🤍 on Knight of Cups

Axe 🪓 on The Hermit

Color Card: Bahana Beige 🎨

“I quietly listen, allowing you to color your own palate.”

If you are drawn to Bahana Beige, it is time to take an impartial look at your situation and drop the excuses. Your answers will come when you remain still. Take no action at this time. The action of Bahana Beige is to listen. Now is the time to consider the other side, because there may be some valuable insights in another point of view. This technique can help produce great strides in communication in your relationships. When we are fixed on a position (or opinion), we are not in the neutral space of Bahana Beige.

This is an opportunity to see who you are in a relationship. Ask yourself, “How does my present attitude or position serve me?” When you answer this question, you will begin to gain more insight into choosing what is for the highest good in any situation. Another way to position a question is in thinking from the other person’s point of view. Is there another way to see this situation? What do you see now?

This is a very difficult personality, but definitely worthwhile. They are very serious, intense even, in their seriousness, and STUBBORN. This by far is the broadest spectrum of signs and personalities, but Mars dominates, they are clearly the hardest workers, the strictly disciplined, the action takers 💯 This is a person who is either divorced when you meet them, married but on their way to divorce, or they’ve had pain in their life due to parental figures, possible divorce in that sense as well. The Emperor is highlighted in their own personality, and as someone demanding, dominating & commanding that’s *over* them in some way and has since been cut off. Probably a father figure. For some this is a job, not parents, and a boss that’s unfairly and suddenly cut them off or out. This person knows struggle and the need to stand up to some dominating person, whether at home or in career, and in some sense they also wear a mask of intimidating & dominating traits. A job is being highlighted as having some level of regeneration to it, with Starfish ⭐️ on 10th House, they could be shifting careers or someone that does this more than once, some of you could meet them at work, but career has been a struggle in its own way no matter what these Emperor/Empress energies are otherwise. Previous failures have left a bitter taste in their mouth.

But that is not who they are inside. They are disappointed by the hand life has dealt them, and they feel a sense of competition everywhere they go, again heavy Mars energy here. They’ve lost a few of those “competitions” and may have a large ego that kinda kicks them in the butt if they’re not careful. They tend to shift blame outward and skirt any accountability, even within reason. The most difficult thing about this person is the negativity in their perception. They do not compromise. Their way or the highway. Black Cross on The Hierophant, they’re probably an atheist, and could have very negative views on any number of things. Certain companies, marriage as a whole, spirituality, specific ways of doing things that are not in line with *their* beliefs…even if that is simply “how to cut an onion”, and it’s wrong but good luck telling them that. They will willingly DIE on a pretty stupid hill, even if they’re wrong. Fixed energy 💯 A lot of needless arguments accompany this person and it just depends on your own personality & story what those are. Part of them genuinely likes to fight. Good luck with that 😆🤦‍♀️

Underneath this person’s “tough” exterior is a big emotional baby, to put it bluntly. Not very “mature”, with ick emotions that accompany very negative beliefs and perceptions, they tend to overdramatize and their emotions spill out like a flood when they’re upset. But, as anger, not sadness. Again…Mars. This can really be any sign with heavy Mars energy tbh, that’s what I’m getting here. The positive side to that is when they’re sad, happy, angry, upset, they can’t hide it so there’s no question as to where others stand with them. 100% not a fake person, they don’t just slap on a smile because someone says so or expects one, no.

They’ve lost many people in their lives and are pretty closed off and Hermit-like in nature. They’ve experienced disappointments in all areas of life, work, love, family, friends, you name it & they’ve probably experienced it. Their perceptions of things are so negative because of this, and that’s something perhaps you will help to change. Bahana Beige shows Spirit working in their favor the most when they try to remain impartial. It’s like not even expecting a total change, just be open, that’s all that’s asked of them & they’re blessed. They get way too caught up in obstacles and details, their negative thinking tends to mess up their plans, not anything being actually “against them”. They envision roadblocks where there are none, and have very little if any faith. There is a lot of past pain in this person, and they’re also very nostalgic about happy times, friends, possibly ex lovers, childhood memories, they may romanticize how things were vs seeing the reality of the situations or how things have changed, maybe they just miss the old days in some way. It’s a process, but they may talk about these things at random, and those things are often on their mind. At heart, this person is deeply romantic and would like the fairy tale to exist how it should, it just hasn’t yet and they’re bitter. Their intentions are noble and pure, and they’ve got a heart of gold for the right person. Healing is a top priority for them. Or it needs to be.

Deep down, this person wants marriage, children, the perfect picture of how things “should be”, even down to the 1950’s style cards I’m using for this pile, that matches up perfectly. They see a picket fence and wonder why they don’t have the right person to fit this image. I don’t get a sense of illusions too much though, they just want their soulmate, but may be a bit of a perfectionist about ideals, they could need a dose of realism in that sense. It’s not 1950 so…within reason. For some, they may be very difficult to see as long term because they assume everything will end up like the past, so they push it away, and you’ll have to fight back in that sense, because you’re different. Once they find that right person for them, they’re very conservative, truthful, loving, romantic even, this is someone that expects to be courted or will court you “the right way”, very passionate and eager for love, they aren’t a game player and if/when they do love you this is one that lasts forever 🙏

Pile 6: Maze

6 Wands - Knight of Pentacles - 4 Wands

Regarding: Ace of Cups

Dreaming Way: Fox & Tree

Oracles: Intuition, Distractions, Success

Possible Signs: Aries, Gemini & Pisces, possible Taurus with Venus, 2nd House & Hierophant, but I’m definitely getting its more the behavior than actual signs with this one

Zodiac Message:

Venus - Aries - 2nd House

- Cherish your willpower patiently.

- Enjoy what you think you know about what you want.

- Charm, art, and beauty are the way to do it your own way and get what you need.

Charms:

Red Moon 🌙& Bad & Boujee 😈 on Gold Coins

Child 👦🏻 on 10 Cups

Black Clover 🍀 on Distractions

Rose 🌹 on 6 Wands

Bunny 🐰 on 4 Wands

Bicycle 🚲 on Aries

Dolphins 🐬 on 6 Swords

Telephone ☎️ on Page of Wands

Color Card: Gold Coins 💰

“I only seek to give you what you ask for.”

Gold Coins gently asks you to look at your relationship with money. Money doesn’t care where it goes. It naturally goes toward appreciation and gratitude. What we do with our own abundance makes the difference. Are you blaming something on money? Are you running from it? Be wary of using your financial situation as an excuse to avoid doing something you love to do. Are you questioning a relationship or career that is hitting a rocky time? It may be time to look for the good in it. Remember there are two sides to every coin. What you desire may currently be manifesting. Great riches are waiting for you to use them. You can ask the universe for riches or poverty, the universe doesn’t care, only you can change your inner experience. “Things” only hold value when we think they do. If there were no money, it didn’t exist, what else would you do? What else would you focus on?

Two things are possible with this person. One, they may be already married or otherwise involved when you meet them. Possibly have children. Two, if they’re not, then they definitely want a marriage & children. This is almost a wolf in sheep’s clothing, especially with Fox here, and it’s not so much in a mean, conniving sort of way, unless they had a whole other family before you…possible. They may play this role to someone else, for you. But for most it’s in a financial way. They are very romantic, clever, charming, madly in love with sweeping someone off of their feet, and they do put in a lot of effort to keep their relationships happy, passionate, and stable. But when it comes to money, this person is almost dangerous in how reckless they can be. Venus is in detriment in Aries, and being 2nd House is telling as well. It’s not a soft & loving kind of placement, it’s notorious for independence and selfishness, in this case when it comes to personal finances and the things they own. Like a home, which is highlighted with 4 Wands here.

Gold Coins highlights the relationship with money, this is a major downfall to this person. Red Moon and the Bad & Boujee bottle, along with the Black Clover 🍀 on Distractions all show stupid impulses, “standards”, possible major issues with money. This could be a gambling problem, definitely a spending problem whether it’s shoes, cars, hair products, I don’t know the what except that it’s excessive and can cause major problems in their life. Probably already has. Fox with Tree can show them being financially bamboozled by a clever salesman type, or they could be that to YOU, putting their health at risk even, or things like insurance, 401k, long term stability that they don’t consider due to the need for convenience, impatience, or satisfaction right NOW. It is only money they are this way with. That I can see. Having Fox here, they will not be open and up front about these issues but will skirt them at every opportunity. Taking accountability means change, which they don’t intend to do.

Knight of Pentacles does show them to be a hardworking person. Not rich, not poor, they earn everything they have. They could be a sucker for a quick scheme, and if that’s the case it’s literally never worked out for them, so idk what the temptation even is there. For a very slight few, it’s possible the ex was this way and took them for everything they had, or they lost everything in a separation. If so, even kids. There’s a possibility of their children living far away from them as well and only really communicating by telephone. They’re the type to not pay child support, cash under the table, scheme scheme scheme. Only take that if it resonates, it’s for those leaving a family, and for that story that’s exactly what they’ll do…but you get the repercussions of all that. If you do not yet know this person, they’re definitely not the type to initiate, you’ll have to show interest, Phone on Page of Wands shows them waiting not initiating, they’re not the type for it. Or the connection starts as messages, not in person.

If not a family then this person may have once lived or traveled somewhere by the sea, with Dolphins on 6 Swords, and they keep in contacts with the friends from wherever they once were, or maybe go back and visit every so often. Could be where the money goes, in part. Distractions has the Black Clover on it and feels more like destructive hobbies that cost a lot of money, keeps them from getting ahead, and blocks success that’s available for them and ready for the taking. If you two have children together, they are a very loving parent. While present. If they have kids far away, they just don’t have them and can’t see a way out of that situation. This is a person that has overcome many difficulties and continues growing, they’re not forever stuck, but they do take a very long time. Or their job is one that isn’t the greatest, but it’s reliable, and saving up for something significant takes a very long time, even longer because there’s always some nonsense or excuse as to why money is missing. They’re responsible with your heart, not so much your wallet. There is a part of them that comes out as a Fox, they manipulate when they feel there is no other way…and they are selfish when it comes to doing what they want and how…just be mindful of that 🙏

I don’t get the best or worst vibes from this person, they just need someone that’s on top of everything to flat out be like “no” when it’s necessary, them leading the troops probably isn’t the wisest idea. But they are supportive, very loving, loyal in love at least so far as I can tell. Money is the issue. Some of them just come with money issues, child support, debt, bad credit, things like that. And they have the potential for success, plenty of money, they just also have the potential to blow it all in one day too. They like fancy things, and love to spend spend spend. It’s part of the deal with them. They could have a gifts love language. You must be the sort of person that’s on top of things to attract someone like this. Or you’ll need to be, they’re a clever one.

Pile 7: New Life 🌱

Page of Cups - The Star - 9 Wands rev & 8 Wands

Regarding: Knight of Cups

Dreaming Way: Book, Tree, Mountain

Oracles: Nurture, Collaboration, Dream

Possible Signs: Pisces, Taurus, Virgo, Sagittarius & Aquarius, possibly Scorpio with Death & Topaz

Zodiac Message:

Uranus - Taurus - 7th House

- An unusual example of resources to maintain balance.

- A different way of looking at the practicality of cooperation.

- An unexpected change resulting from the productivity of your partner.

Charms:

Taurus ♉️ on Topaz

Dancer 💃 on Collaboration

Moulin Rouge 💋 and Bad & Boujee 😈 on Knight of Wands

Cupid 💘 on Temperance

Color Card: Topaz 💛

“If I seek peace, I must embrace my fears.”

Topaz speaks: “To be enlightened is to realize that to gain peace, fear in the heart must be faced.” If Topaz has come to you, he is telling you that it is time to stop talking about what you intend on doing. You must just do it. Things happen for us when we take action, which is the only way to break through what is holding us back. The change that is called for here is surrender, which is an action in itself. No great tasks were ever achieved easily. Remember we do a lot to avoid what we feel will hurt us; you must understand that the pain will recede if you face your fears, allowing you to walk through to the other side. Topaz whispers “Pray for guidance and you will be assisted.” Do not despair, for if Topaz has come to you, relief awaits. By facing your fears, peace and enlightenment will be your reward. That is the gift. All you need to do is ask.

This is a very loving person, romantic, soft, dreamy, emotional, and very partnership oriented, they could be the sort of person that has only ever worked within partnerships, whether that’s love, friendships, family, they’re a “group-minded” and close-knit kind of person with 7th House highlighted. They could have a dominant 7th, possibly with the Sun or Moon there. Taurus also is a very domestic and family oriented sign, whether it actually applies to their chart or not, they are your family person. Nurture shows a picture of a Native woman with a baby on her back, Collaboration shows a pair of people, 10 Cups and 10 Pentacles are here showing groups of very close knit people make them happiest. The group is everything, family is everything, and they are a nurturing & giving type of personality, regardless of gender. Possibly a parent already, if so it’s a defining factor in who they are, or that’s definitely something they want later on.

This person has been through some difficult times in regards to some level of toxicity whether at work or in their family. Could be both. Moulin Rouge and Bad & Boujee show those being along a sexual or provocative nature, there’s been Death & major transformations in themselves regarding this, and it could be any number of things, some very traumatizing. Hugs to them. They may not have been an angel at one time, either playing the field, working in toxic/sensual types of conditions, possible addictions, but have learned and sacrificed for the family, children, there is an energy of sacrifice here which would match all of the Pisces energy coming through, whether it literally applies to signs or not. This may be someone else entirely in their environment or past that had to go. Death is attached to all of these things, it’s in the past.

This person has a lot of healing to do, but they’re happy to do it, a more optimistic and happy personality for sure even with the struggles they’ve been through. They are mature in their energy with Temperance, and The Sun outshines any Moon confusion they may have once had, this is someone aware of their manifestations, where they’ve been, what they want, and where they’re going. All with a very happy energy with this Sun, and a romantic & dreamy outlook on life in general with Knight of Cups. Cupid on Temperance shows them as mature, patient, and very accepting or tolerant of the differences in people, they don’t seem to mind yours if you don’t mind theirs. A very peaceful energy, and not one to rush into things, which if Taurus applies, they rush for no one ever 😆

Taurus being on Topaz could show a person with both Taurus and Scorpio qualities, or possible oppositions like this in their chart that equal a balance in this person’s personality. They’re more patient, fluid, go with the flow, and less stubborn. They may have been hurt in the past, love wise, and you could surprise them because they weren’t looking when you found them, or they didn’t know what they wanted until they found you. It’s a very sweet energy with them.

With Book, Tree, and Mountain, they could be a book worm or an avid learner of all of the things, and what’s highlighted is health obstacles they may have had to face, however that may apply. Self help books, meditations, yoga, anger management or any number of peaceful mind/body tactics may be something they’re into. Tree also pertains to the environment, this could be a very environmentally conscious person, a vegan or vegetarian, a compost creating gardener type, something along those lines. Mountain describes obstacles they’ve faced or are currently dealing with, some may have a long term illness of some kind or some sort of routine to deal with a particular ailment of theirs, like physical therapy, or holistic medicine for example. That won’t apply everywhere, or in any specific way for the collective, just take it how it resonates for you.

Dancer 💃 is on Collaboration, that could be some way you know them, they like to dance or you do this together, maybe take classes, or they have. It’s highlighted with their creativity in a very fun way, and this person seems most focused on the fun of situations, especially in groups of people. The more the merrier!

#pick a card #PAC #soulmate #pick a pile #your true soulmate #zodiac sign #astrology #astroblr #march 2023

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diazsdimples · 5 months

Text

Inspiration Saturday!!

I did a bad thing and started a new fic, which will be known as the Musician AU. Basically, Eddie, Hen & Chim are all players in the L.A Philharmonic, Bobby is the conductor, and Buck joins them for one concert as a new hot shot cello soloist. Eddie immediately falls head over heels for the man and him and Buck fuck nasty in many many backstage rooms. This is gonna be a long snippet sorry, I'm scared it's too niche lmao

Tagged by @callmenewbie @wildlife4life @loserdiaz @thewolvesof1998, thank you guys!

Eddie gets to his chair and takes a moment to fully appreciate that it’s his. He’s not played first horn for a while, let alone while being the principal, and he’s pretty hyped. He takes a moment to unpack his horn, slotting the slides carefully into place and pressing the valves up and down to make sure they don’t need any grease. He’s so focused on it that he doesn’t hear Hen sneaking up to his side, clarinet in hand, and almost jumps out of his skin when she speaks.

“So, have you seen our new soloist yet?” she asks, leaning casually against his music stand and Eddie lets out a startled yelp.

“Not yet” he responds once his heart rate has gone back to normal.

Hen picks at something in her teeth. “Apparently, he’s very good, Tracy and Jeff can’t stop talking about him. It’s getting on my nerves”.

“Makes sense that he’s good, you don’t solo with the L.A Phil if you’re shit” Eddie jokes and Hen sends him a flat look.

“You know what I mean” she responds dryly. “Was the youngest in his class at Juilliard and did a stint playing in New Zealand with the NZSO before moving back to New York and playing with the New York Phil”.

Eddie can’t help but be impressed; the New York Philharmonic isn’t easy to get into and from what he’s heard, the NZSO are no slouches either. “He must be alright then”.

“You talking about Wonder-Boy Buckley? More than alright from what I hear”. Chimney is slouching towards them, weaving his way through the chairs and music stands from where he usually sits as principal trumpet. “Cathy says he’s hot. You’d better not let him distract you, Eddie”.

Eddie rolls his eyes playfully at Chimney as he sets his music out on the stand. “I have excellent impulse control, thank you. Haven’t had a random hookup in almost a year, even though Joel’s been repeatedly trying to jump my bones”.

“He does that with everyone, don’t feel special” Chimney replies, and he pats Eddie on the back.

“Why do they call him Wonder-Boy Buckley by the way?” Eddie asks. “Buckley’s a weird name, isn’t it?”

“Buckley is his surname; his first name is Evan” Hen explains while Chimney blows into his trumpet to warm it up. “And he’s Wonder-Boy because he’s so young and hot”

Eddie scoffs at this. Wonder-Boy Buckley sounds like a bit of a prick, honestly.

“Ready for your big moment? First movement of the concerto has a pretty big horn solo, and Bobby is expecting big things from you”. Chimney is looking at him with big eyes and if Eddie didn’t know him better, he’d think the guy was actually concerned.

Eddie won’t lie, he is pretty nervous about it. The cello solo and the horn have a few moments in the piece where it’s just them playing and it’s damn high and fucking difficult. Eddie’s done it in concert before, but that was with a much more minor orchestra and not in front of an audience of 2000+ people. However, Chimney and Hen under no circumstances are allowed to know he’s nervous so he shrugs nonchalantly and says, “yeah, I’ve been practicing it loads and think I’ve got it all sorted. Unless the soloist is truly as hot as you say, I’m pretty sure nothing will throw me”.

It seems the gods are listening to Eddie and laughing at him, because at that very moment, an extremely attractive young man walks into the auditorium with a cello strapped to his back and all Eddie can think is fuck, he’s really fucking hot.

“Oh look, there he is” Chimney says, perking up and Hen’s eyes flit across the auditorium, coming to rest on the man and her jaw drops.

“Holy shit, he’s hot. And I like girls”

“How’s our resident dick-expert doing” Chimney nudges Eddie teasingly and Eddie’s currently making a conscious effort not to drool.

“Yeah he’s – uh – he’s not bad”.

Not bad? Eddie is convinced this is the hottest man he’s ever seen in his life. His muscles bulge as he swings the cello case off his back and sets it on the ground and he flicks his head up to talk to Bobby, his blond curls flouncing delightfully as he does so. Even from here, Eddie can see how his eyes are a piercing blue and he can’t help but notice the way they crinkle as he smiles at Bobby, flashing a set of perfect, white teeth. He’s got some sort of mark around his eyebrow, maybe a piercing? Eddie can’t quite tell from this distance but man, it’s got him feeling things he hasn’t felt in a long time.

Hen and Chimney are sharing a knowing look and Eddie firmly ignores them, instead picking up his horn and beginning to blow some warm air into it. Terry, Amy, Sophie and Grant, his fellow horn players, have all turned up and are setting up, striking up idle conversation with one another as they wait for Bobby to give the order to tune up and start practicing. Hen pats Eddie on the back before returning to her chair and Chimney wiggles his eyebrows as he retreats, flicking his tongue around his mouthpiece suggestively.

(No pressure) tagging @theotherbuckley @eddiebabygirldiaz @wikiangela @fionaswhvre @smilingbuckley @fortheloveofbuddie @fruitandbubbles @watchyourbuck @incorrect9-1-1 @knightlywonders @housewifebuck @monsterrae1 @evanbegins @cal-daisies-and-briars @thosetwofirefighters @disasterbuckdiaz @spagheddiediaz @malewifediaz @shitouttabuck @jeeyuns

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80s4life · 9 months

Text

Pawns”

Word Count: 4,522

Status: Requested!

Ask: Pleeeeeaase write more of Cal from titanic. Literally any prompt I’m so hungry😭

Ask #2: Pleasee could we have more cal hockley content, specifically more chapters for "the things I've never done" and even more short stories if you have the time, I love your work 💕 [THANK YOU SM! I WAS STARTING TO GET SELF CONSCIOUS OF MY WORK AGAIN]

Ask #3 will have an attachment to a separate Cal fic as well, so no request will be shown here until that one.

@: Three cutie pie nonnies!

Relationship: Caledon “Cal” Hockley x Female!Reader

Fandom: Titanic 1997

Summary: Thrusted into the roaring 20′s, all you wanted to be was free and outgoing as all the booming women in city. However, your father’s deal with the devil seals your fate in the hands of your advisor and boss, Caledon Hockley; a man who is haunted by memories, stubborn in his ways, and opposed to the newfound strength in the young women of America. You’re a slave at his will in his eyes, yet you’re just as free as the new reformed women in your own. You’re stuck at a standstill in this endless game of chess, but who’s the pawn?

Warnings: forbidden, early 1900′s morals and customs, Reader is a maid, Cal is the head of the house, Post-Titanic sinking, mature language, kinda spicy, PTSD, domestic violence (included in a PTSD episode ONLY), Kind of a Beauty and The Beast AU for inspiration

{gif is not mine, credit goes to @locke-writes}

It was all an act of practicality from the start: your father owed his father money and he had a set of nimble hands to rid himself of.

Nathan Hockley was a millionaire who dealt in the steel tycoon business in Pittsburgh. Your father had a habit of gambling with the wrong people, which had allegedly caused your father to have an uncomfortable run-in with the powerful man. Unable and too stubborn to do so, your father handed you off as a way of reparation for the damage the bastard had caused.

Nathan’s son, Caledon Hockley, was the exact replica of his father. He was cunning, stubborn, powerful and wealthy; a disrupting mixture of facets that could either lift or crush you with a simple snap of a finger. He was dangerous, among many of his other qualities, which made your business in the Hockley’s presence just that much harder.

With the pandemonium that followed the sinking of the Titanic in 1914, the physical and mental effects had taken ahold of Nathan’s deeply treasured and only son, practically keeping him on house arrest until he was “better”. However, to both Nathan and Caledon’s dismay, 6 years had done nothing for his declining health, the reasoning behind why Nathan had administered you into Caledon’s household in the first place.

All of these events have led you up to this point, your suitcase rolling behind you as one of the many maids in the manor lead you up to your room to unpack. You haven’t seen this young and precarious man yet, but something is telling you that you most likely don’t want to. You are soon to be given your list of instructions to follow immediately and precisely; left to your own devices to either stay afloat or drown in the fury of the Hockley men.

Maria, a young maid in her 20′s, around your age, approaches you with a pure and youthful grin, a light blush to her cheeks. Her hair is cut into a cropped bob of black hair with short but soft curls, her lean frame with modest green eyes making her endearing - intoxicating. “You must be Miss Y/L/N?” her cutesy, high pitched voice only adding to her allure and picturesque innocence.

“Yes, that’s me,” you mutter, displaying your hands as if to show yourself off in sarcasm.

“No need to be so glum!” she giggles, bowing her head to catch your eyes and raise your line of sight. “I’m Maria Espinosa, but I’d assume the least you’d want right now is formalities.”

You snort, but let her continue nonetheless.

“I’ve your instructions - written myself, of course!” she smiles brightly; any harder and she might break her face. “As you know, with your appointment into this manor, the rest of the faculty will be let off, per Nathan Hockley’s request. But, don’t fret, the list is simple, short and can last all day without having to pay too much mind. Every Tuesday and Thursday, there will be a grocer that will restock the cabinets, refrigerator, etc. and help you with the cleaning. You are not to touch the east wing and only reside within the west - this will help eliminate the messes to clean and prevent extra exertion-”

“Sorry, if I may be crude, why are we not to go in the east wing?” you ask, curiosity getting the best of you.

“It was...” Maria drifts off, choosing her words lightly, “After the accident in 1914, the east was torn by his own hands. It was once used for balls and such, but after the Titanic,” she whispers the name as if someone might hear her, “Caledon was bedridden and sick, upset, angry, any emotion in the book. He used that wing as a way to let those emotions out.”

You stay silent as you stare at her with morbid curiosity and fear, nodding once before returning your attention to the list. The rest seems easy, not like the job was ever hard to begin with, just an annoyance for better words.

Maria clears her throat, “Anyway, you must make at least two meals a day, mainly breakfast and dinner, both at 8 am and 8 pm. Caledon might decide not to have lunch some days, but if he does, make sure it is brought to him by 12 pm. He doesn’t like tardiness, so as long as you follow the rules as tightly as you can, you won’t be a target. Any questions?”

“No, no. I’d presume you’d want to be heading out?” you smirk at her mischievously and instantly watch as her taut muscles relax.

“Very much so, yes! It’s been forever since I’ve had a moment of freedom.”

“Well, don’t let me keep you, I’m sure I’ll be fine,” you shoo her off playfully. This is your family’s mess to clean, the least you can do is let her be free of the shackles that are now passed down and chained to your ankles.

Maria is halfway through the door when she turns to you from the foyer, “I’ll do a monthly checkup to make sure everything is in line, and for a little company in your lonesome, okay?”

You smile gratefully, hands coming up to play with your nails, “Thank you, you’re very kind. Though, I don’t want to be a burden.”

“A burden? You just gave me my freedom!” she exclaims, laughing as she waves a hand. “I’ll be back by the end of the month! Settle in and enjoy the quiet!”

The moment the door slams shut, your shoulders droop heavily. Your eyes scan the spacious mansion with frightening curiosity. You’ve never even remotely been near land such as this, and now that you’re inside, it feels almost too much. You let your hands glide the carved wooden banister as you walk up the huge steps to the second floor, taking a left down a hall.

Your legs carry you down the long corridor, and, as you place your key into the fob, your eyes lay onto the door across from yours: ‘Lord Hockley’ carved neatly on the door. There’s a rustling behind it and footsteps that approach the other side of the door, eliciting you to push the key one click further and dive through the door as quickly and quietly as possible.

You flop onto the bed with a huff, trying to calm the beating of your heart just enough to allow you to unpack and prepare dinner within the course of 3 hours. When your room is finished, you nod in satisfaction, taking a bath in the connected bathroom and changing into a thin, sheer dress before exiting your room and back down the steps to the kitchen.

Finally do you take the time to read the list on your own. It includes very detailed and descriptive instructions, easy nonetheless, of medication usages and what to do with each, meal plans, recipes, a map of which rooms to clean and how to clean each one, and Caledon’s nightly and morning rituals to follow precisely.

Shrugging your shoulders, you roll your neck to release the tension before opening the cookbook up to the recipe designed for today’s date. “Pork roast,” you state alloud, cringing at the echo of your voice being followed by more movement in Hockely’s room.

Your mind roams as your eyes get lost at the sight of the luscious woods out the window, hands deftly whisking away at the pork roast’s grease with the intent of making a nice gravy to coat the dry, but tender pork roast. Shaking your head, you peer down and try to busy yourself with the already settling boredom you’re consumed by.

You can hear the halls creak, the water drip from the faucet, birds chirping outside, the soft sway of the wind, random clicks, ticks, and other noises. You’re destined to go insane.

You jump unexpectedly with the sound of a crash from upstairs. The noise comes from the general direction of Caledon’s room and you all but groan at what the sound indicates - what your being here demands.

Putting the roast of low, you close the lid with a soft click before ascending up the stairs to Caledon’s room. You stand outside the door, hand on your heart, as you try to calm your rapid heartbeat and breathing. This was to come about sooner rather than later, so you should be glad it’s happening now. However, the banging continues within the room and you know that even if you had met him in a few months, the hell that follows him would never be escaped for as long as your father’s debt remains.

Knocking on the hard wooden door, you speak softly, “Lord Hockley? Is everything alright?”

You’re not given an answer, only the sound of something heavy being thrown and falling to the floor.

“Lord Hockey?” you call out again, louder this time. Unsurprised, you are followed by no answer once more. Annoyance creeps into your words a third and final time, “Lord Hockley, I will come in there myself if you do not open this door. Now,” you demand.

Shrugging when no voice calls to you form the other side of the door, your hand twists the doorknob and pushes the door open. You legs carry you only so far before they stutter to a stop just past the door frame.

Just before you, there is a disheveled, sweaty Caledon Hockley, fit from youth and some maturity in his thirties, shirtless. His eyes look crazed, like a madman, as his hands grip a chair at his desk with white knuckles. Around the room, there’s shelves torn down, broken, books in a disarray on the floor. His bedsheets are thrown about with the other chair from his desk propped against the wall in his fury.

You stare wide-eyed, but somehow, not alarmed in the slightest. You were accustomed to this sort of outburst, especially within the hard working men. You saw it in your father - even in your younger brother. “Lord Hockley,” your voice is softer again, all annoyance and anger lost at the door.

His eyes snap up to you, as if he had just noticed your arrival or presence. “What are you doing in here? You are not to barge in a man’s room, that is uncouth for a woman of your age and status. What is wrong with you?”

“Lord Hockley-” you try to start your confession.

“A woman is not to speak up to a man; are you ferel? Are you-?”

You don’t allow him to finish his slandering, “-I am mentally efficient, Lord Hockley, and very aware of my positioning here. However, I did knock, three times to be exact, with no answer. There had been a ruckus in here for about-” you peer up at the clock above his desk, “-an hour and a half now. I came to be of assistance, but if my help is unwanted, I’d happily leave you to your self-pity on your own?”

He has no other emotion present except bewilderment plastered to his face; eyes wide, mouth agape, and at a struggle for words. His fists clench and unclench as his eyes pan down to stare at the floor, appearing deep in thought.

“Lord Hockley, if I may be so bold?” you ask, scanning his body language and searching to find the meaning of this man’s crazed outburst.

“Go ahead,” he mutters, a hand going up to rub some hair from his eyes, still staring at the floor.

“You may confide in me if that means helping your mental health?” you offer. You know this could go one of two ways: either one, he’ll turn you away, suffer alone, and claim that men have no such weaknesses, or two, he’ll let his guard drop and release him from these dark episodes he’s no stranger to. The latter seems rather unlikely.

“I am not mental.”

“I did not say that. I was simply insisting that everyone has a dark place their mind goes to, which is a detriment to a person’s mental health. Let alone someone who is expected to heal quickly and pick up the family business, am I correct?”

Just as you thought you were getting somewhere, Cal’s eyes snap back up to yours with anger, the malicious anger tearing at his body again, “You know nothing of my family’s business and nothing of me. You have no audacity as to even assume or place yourself in my shoes. I should have you thrown out or hanged for your mouth alone. Get out!”

“Just trying to be of service, sir, since I’m at your will!” you smile sickeningly, bowing to him and sliding through the door just as a book is picked up and thrown.

You let out a deep breath of air on the other side of his door, now in the safety of the hallway. Your throat tightens with a soft sob, tears welling in your eyes. You truly feel as a prisoner on death row, hands and ankles encased in heavy metal cuffs; struggling to walk under the watchful gazes and heavy chains slowing you down, keeping you locked in this manor.

You weren’t the perpetrator, you know this, but you were framed to support the guilty with your own naivety and love.

You drag yourself back down to the kitchen to finish the man’s meal with dejection, but still devoted for the greater future - when you no longer have to be a maid in this manor and be free, lost in the world again.

“Lord Hockley?” you call once more at his door, only this time, you’re holding his tray of dinner. “I have your meal, are you decent?”

You hear a muffled ‘Yes’ and proceed through the door cautiously.

It seems he’s settled now, sitting at his desk with notes and papers scattering the floor and desk. He hadn’t cleaned the room, which you suspected you’d have to clean in the near future. However, you notice the bed is drenched in liquid, and when you look back at him, you notice sweat beading at his forehead, a thin sheen of sweat glistening against his skin.

“Lord Hockley?” you call again, stepping closer towards him. He chooses not t answer you, so you press further. “You’re sweating.”

“I’m very well aware of what my body is doing.”

“Are you feeling ill? I can help you if-” you are cut off by his fist meeting the solid oak of the desk.

“I do not need any assistance from the likes of you, nor do I want it,” his voice is stern, scary.

You try not to lose your temper so easily this time, so you give him a kind, tight-lipped smile. “Of course, my lord, you are a man after all. A man is able to take care of himself just fine, though he installs many maids within his manor. Maids like me,” you giggle dryly, “What shall I do instead, since you are able to clean, cook, and much more without the help of the ‘likes of me’?”

Caledon only groans, “Just leave the food here, you are dismissed. I’ll leave my tray for you to clean in the morning.”

“Oh, how kind,” you roll your eyes, scurrying to the door.

“Oh, and Miss, maybe you could find a better countenance and leave your convictions in your pillow when you arise. Wouldn’t want to explain to my father - and yours - as to why you were no longer needed and let go.”

You can hear the sinister smirk in his voice, but you choose to ignore it - for now - and head to bed briskly.

The next two weeks follow you in a similar form. You do as your told, albeit begrudgingly, and get into many of your childish arguments. Your interactions with the man are nasty and violent at times, always finding yourself dodging an object, taking threats, and coming in the next morning asking for more.

More, more, more; you ask for more because there is nothing else to be given. You have to take everything as a grain of salt. You have to because this means your father’s life and yours. If you manage to screw up, and you will, they will not only have your father’s head, but yours for Caledon’s punctured ego.

Though, somewhere within those weeks, you started to care less and less.

“Lord Hockley?” you knock at his door, tray of food in hand. He once more gives you no answer, so you push in.

Greeted by no light in the room, you walk around in the darkness, knowing this room like the back of your palm now. Placing the tray of food on the oak countertop and go to strike a match, lighting the candle on the desk. Going around the room, you light each and every one of them until the room is dimly lit enough to see.

On the bed, you find Caledon, sweat having gotten worse as you’ve noticed he never leaves his room. When you step closer, he is shivering, teeth chattering. Worried, you go to place the back of your hand to his forehead, but quickly draw your hand back when he jerks upright.

“Lord Hockley!” you jump, the ghost of his skin still lingering on the pads of your fingers. “You’re burning up, I need to help assist you now. You’re very ill and the sickness has gone on long enough-”

“No!” his voice rips through you quiet pleas, rattling off the walls.

“But, Lord Hockley-”

“I said ‘No’! I do not want assistance, I am a grown man!”

“’You can take care of yourself’, yeah, yeah, bullshit!” you scream, the frustration, fear, and hurt finally meeting your words as you are blinded by your emotions.

“What did you say?” Caledon looks at you in disbelief.

You cringe as you can guess what is about to take place in mere minutes, but you don’t hold back anymore. “Is your bigotry deafening your hearing or did you hear me call bullshit?”

Shakily, Caledon gets off his bed, his frame towering yours as he glares down at you with pale skin and dark, chocolate brown eyes.

“Your father wouldn’t want you to be sick, knowing that you would have to run his business soon.”

“My father-” Caledon cuts himself off, a hand going to wipe his face. “This has nothing to do with the business.”

“No? Well then, why else would I have to pamper you like a king? Is it because you’re defective?”

Caledon’s pacing now, trying to calm his increasing ragged breathing.

“Or is it because your useless to him? Mentally unstable?” you continue, trying to get a rise out of him.

“You know nothing of his business nor my personal life!” Caledon snaps back to you, anger finally bursting.

As his anger ensues, he takes steps close to you each time, piercing his thick index finger into you chest for emphasis. “You are nothing, you are worthless. I am a wealthy businessman. I am a strong, independent man with power. People would miss me if I were gone!”

“If you’re such a big man, you wouldn’t lock yourself away in your room like a toddler.”

That’s what finally did him in. You pressed a personal button when your short quips finally hit a nerve, testing his masculinity. Before you have time to react, a glass vase is hurled at you. It was a short throw, and was nowhere near your face, however it caught you by surprise and smashed against your hip.

You ignore the pain, though all you wanted to do was bury yourself in a hole. You came here to help him, but all you are returning is anger and hurt that is most definitely placed at you.

“You’re sick and it is my job to take care of you, so your father won’t have my ass because his baby boy isn’t okay. It’s my job to make sure you are very well satisfied. It is my job that you get your linens washed, food prepared, room cleaned, and make it my duty that your estate is fully functioning all on my own!” you jab a finger in his direction, placing more distance between your bodies until your back hits his door, his body on the other side of the room behind his desk.

He goes to say more, but you cut him off with more furious blows.

“Though, what isn’t my job is to allow you to threaten me. It isn’t my job to be belittled and yelled at by you. It isn’t my job to allow you to throw objects and whatever anger you have and hurl them at me! That is not my job, nor what I will allow any longer!”

“I never asked you to be here. I didn’t want you here. You forced yourself into my estate to protect your father. You knew what you were getting into just by the public papers alone. You knew what was to be expected and yet you came here anyway. You made a prisoner and a victim of yourself.” Caledon’s gaze does not falter and neither does yours.

“You’re correct, Lord Hockley, I may have known what I was getting myself into. What I didn’t know nor expect was the childish frustration and blatant disregard for human decency. I’ve tried over and over again to be kind, but against your better judgement, you couldn’t allow me to be the person to hold such compassion.”

Your eyes are welling up with tears now as you feel a warm liquid flow down your palm and to the tips of your fingers.

“You do not understand what is bothering me and you never will,” Caledon finally starts to calm himself, the self-pity returning as he recounts lost memories you cannot decipher.

“No, but I have made it abundantly clear that I was here to help assist you. However, you saw it as being weak, so it wasn’t in your cards to even allow me the common courtesy of being a human being. You felt as if I was lying to you.”

“God, you are so annoying,” Caledon groans.

“The feeling’s mutual.”

“You know, when you’re silent, I almost like you - wait, are you injured?”

“No!” you yell almost instantaneously.

“Did I do that? Its dripping on the floor, what happened?”

“The glass,” you almost stutter, the atmosphere changing quickly. “The glass shatter and cut some of my hand, I’m fine.”

“You’re hurt.”

“And, you’re ill.”

Caledon sighs, his shoulders slumping. Motioning for you to exit the room, Caledon says nothing as you make a silent pact to clean up.

You are suffering whiplash from the sudden change of emotion and it leaves you on edge, but with the cooling of his mood, it allows the adrenaline and some stiffness to leave you. Confusion overtakes your mind.

Guided into the kitchen, you start to take out numerous medications, searching for something to accommodate his symptoms. Caledon walks up to you quietly, almost afraid to get too close.

You do not say or look at each other, finally finding the right medicine and sliding it to him on the counter before sitting down on one of the bar stools. He sits beside you carefully, taking the medicine.

Taking some gauze and wiping away the cuts with an alcohol wipe, you struggle to wrap your hand. That is, until a warmer, larger one goes to encompass it gently, waiting for an action of opposition to its intentions.

Caledon gaze burns the side of your head before you finally acknowledge him with fear. Softly, he starts, “…Just allow me to help?”

You nod softly as the tears form in your eyes again. Some time passes before you finally work up the nerve to ask, “Why do you do this?”

Caledon looks up from you hand with confusion, which urges you on to elaborate, “Why does your mood change so swiftly, so suddenly?”

Sighing, Caledon gives you a firm look, as if he’s deciding whether to trust you or not - to tell you. “The Titanic,” he starts, “When I survived, I lost almost all of who I was. When I returned home to my father, I was constantly burdened with memories. They would consume me, control me, until I felt like a madman. The only solution was anger. When the anger takes control, there is no longer that burning sadness, guilt, and regret; no hoping I’d done something differently. I couldn’t allow myself to do that because I was no longer that man anymore.”

“It’s scary,” you croak, peering into his eyes.

“It is, but what’s worse is the life I’ve lived after the episodes. My father found me defective, worthless. I will never be able to fully recover, which is bad for business. He locked me away in this estate to stay hidden from prying eyes, bedridden to remain unseen even in this secluded property. I insist on doing the simplest actions myself because it makes me feel as if I’m showing my father I am still capable, just changed.”

You nod slowly as you take in this new information, grateful. The man has finally opened up to you, he’s no longer a stranger in his own home as it seems.

Calmly, Caledon pats your hand, signalling that the wrapping is done. A hand reaches up to tuck a strand of hair from your face, resting it on your cheek just afterwards. “I know I’ve hurt you, but please, try to understand me, I’m not asking for your forgiveness... I just wanted you to understand-”

“You don’t need to ask that, I already forgave you a long time ago,” you smile softly, placing one of your hands on his opposing cheek. “We will learn to adapt, just as you have many times before. We are no longer strangers, yeah?”

“Yes,” Caledon smiles with glossy eyes.

“We will work on this together. You are not alone anymore.”

Caledon looks at you with uncertainty.

“I am here, always. Understood?”

“Understood.”

Kissing his forehead softly, you other hand goes to be placed on his shoulder, “Repeat it.”

“I am not alone,” a tear slides down his cheek.

“Not as long as I’m alive,” you smirk, placing a kiss to each of his eyelids.

“Never again,” the both of you say together, lips finally meeting as if to seal the promise the both of you now shared deep in your hearts.

“Never alone.”

#caledon hockley #caledon hockley x reader #caledon hockley imagine #billy zane #billy zane x reader #billy zane imagine #titanic 1997 #titanic x reader #titanic imagine #titanic #cal hockley #cal hockley x reader #cal hockley imagine #1997 #rose dewitt bukater #xreader #female reader

64 notes · View notes

wintaerbaer · 3 months

Note

i keep thinking about a drabble about the photograph in chapter 1 (your eyes tell). about the moment it was taken, what tae was thinking / feeling. so obvs a tae POV. if that was maybe smth you think could work 👉👈

yessss i was always planning on doing a drabble for that one day! now was as good a time as any <3

rating: sfw (for the drabble, series is 18+)

word count: 765

SERIES MASTERLIST // MASTERLIST

Taehyung thinks he would agree with you that the beach house is the best place in the world.

It’s the crashing of the waves in the distance. The smell of the pork belly that Hoseok and Jungkook are cooking drifting from the kitchen’s open window. The soft glow of the string lights draped above his head on the deck. And, of course, the comforting presence of the found family he’d always dreamed of.

In several ways, it’s evocative of his past with you. Running from his father’s hell of a house to the shells of mansions. Filling the spaces between the lavish yet coldly untouched walls with friendship and laughter and a light he wouldn’t have thought possible if you hadn’t shown it to him in the first place.

One of the many things in Taehyung’s life that leads back to you.

And speaking of you…

“Have you heard from Y/N?” he asks, glancing down at his phone for what’s probably the fifteenth time in the past ten minutes.

“No.” Maya adjusts the lens of her camera, aiming it out at the horizon. “And I don’t know why you’re asking me that. If she was going to text anyone, it’d probably be you.”

He knows she’s right–that you likely would have reached out to him before anyone else to communicate a significant delay or if something was wrong. But he’s anxious, restless. An unfortunate but common side effect that he’s long suffered from when you’re not around.

“It shouldn’t take that long to unpack a couple boxes, right?” It’s the reason you had given for arriving late. Though you and Jace moved in together a few months ago at this point, you apparently still haven’t unpacked all the way, and Jace had finally put his foot down.

Maya presses the shutter button on her camera before lowering it to check the shot, not facing him in a show of how she finds his worries unfounded. “Maybe they got distracted,” she says, her voice laced with insinuation.

He flinches internally but keeps his face neutral, a well-practiced routine for him. “I just hope she’s not broken down somewhere.”

“Again,” Maya says, still playing with her camera. “If she was, you’d probably be her first call.”

Taehyung hums, but it’s noncommittal, hesitant. “She might call Jace.”

She snorts, blowing out a puff of air as she does so. “Nope. Definitely you.”

He doesn’t ask for an explanation. Ignores the way her words please him. Instead, he stares down at his phone again, willing you to message him with some kind of an update so he knows you’re not currently fighting for your life on the side of the road or something.

“Should I call her?” he asks when your text exchange remains quiet. “Maybe I should call her.”

“Call who?”

The effect is instantaneous. His nerves settle. The noise bouncing around his skull goes silent. And now–now–he’s truly home.

His ears faintly register the sound of Maya’s shutter going off on the side, but he’s not really paying attention–gazing up at you from his seat by the pool, admiring the way the lights behind you frame the outline of your face like a halo.

You blink down at him with your hands drifting to your hips, perplexed by his lack of an answer or greeting. “What?”

“You’re here,” Taehyung murmurs, a fully-fledged boxy smile breaking out on his face. “Hi.”

“See, she’s not dead,” Maya quips as she smiles herself, clearly pleased with whatever she’s looking at on her camera.

“You thought I was dead?”

“And cold. Possibly already in the ground,” he jokes, even though the image makes him physically ill. But you laugh, and the sound is all he needs to fight off the intrusive thought.

The back door of the house slides open, and Hoseok strides out onto the deck carrying a plate heaped with pork belly, the smell heavenly as he calls you all to eat.

“C’mon.” You gently grab ahold of Taehyung’s hands to guide him to his feet. “I am very not dead, and am, in fact, very hungry. Let’s get some food.” Then you’re practically skipping to the table, greeting your other friends as you go.

Before he can follow you, Maya taps him on the shoulder to hold him back. “Have something to show you later,” she smugly states.

He’s distracted, his eyes still on you as you walk away. “Get a good shot?”

“Mhm.” As he finally turns his attention in her direction, she winks. “Let’s just say you might be appearing in my portfolio one day.”

a/n: thank you for the request!! <3

#taehyung x reader #taehyung x you #taehyung fluff #bts x reader #bts x you #bts imagines #taehyung imagines #taehyung fic #taehyung fanfic #bts fluff #bts fic #bts fanfic

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literaphobe · 1 month

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hmmm is there any specific analysis of tvl youve been dying to share but havent been asked about yet?

ok. there’s a lot. but some I don’t want to do right now for SPOILERY REASONS. some of them are as follows:

- the fundamental misunderstanding that passively occurred between tvl ladynoir for most of tvl

- the way tvl chat noir ‘tests’ ladybug throughout the story and why he does what he does and why he behaves in seemingly ‘bizarre’ ways

- a lot of the others r um. I can’t even share the topic regarding it bc you guys haven’t gotten to whatever chapter it’s linked to yet (feel free to ask any questions tho! be it now or after future chapters. that’s usually what awakens the intense TED talks I give about tvl to myself in my head)

right now tho? I want to pick apart tvl adrien being an actor and why that is and why that’s sad and how it came to be

-> like with many parts of tvl! adrien being an actor is sort of thrust upon readers. it’s a story that places a Huge gap between canon and the tvl timeline, and some details can be inferred, but loads of stuff aren’t things a reader can know for sure

-> also, due to the set up of the story, most of the tiny teased bits of info regarding tvl Adrien’s life leading up to and At 23, is largely fed to readers by tvl marinette, and not tvl adrichat himself, despite most of the story being his pov. but the scenes he is allotted are largely those where he Interacts with ladybug, and when he is with her, he doesn’t think of much else, unless it’s specifically relevant (like the love marks conundrum)

-> he just doesn’t unpack his past in his thoughts very much. however much it pains him. because it’s not something he’d prefer to unpack is how ladybug is making him feel and how he feels about her bc she’s Right There and she has this Hold on his heart that he can’t help but fixate over

-> but what you can tell is that he doesn’t really want to be doing his job… rather he sees it as a means to an end. and also an inevitability in a sense 😔 very. You Can Take The Man Outta The City Not The City Out The Man core. it’s. the ones who abuse us can leave but the effects of that abuse aren’t as easy to shake. it’s also. sometimes we wind up doing what we ran away from but we pat ourselves on the back saying it’s different bc we chose it, or it’s not the same because we wound up in a hole two steps away from what we were originally doing and that’s a different hole so it’s okay maybe!. its. was this too hard to break away from? or was it just too easy to go back to because its all we were ever taught?

-> because imagine ur tvl adrien in uni and your friends have always had passions for things that are vaguely related to industries that you suffered in as a kid. your best friend wants to be a dj but he also loves directing and talks so passionately about his favorite films and DREAMS of making One Of The Greats one day. his gf who is also one of your best friends is into journalism and your ex gf who is also one of your best friends loves designing and fashion. and you used to be a model but don’t want to be a model anymore. u make some small movies to help your best friend with his projects for film classes. they’re so fun! you love how it brings you and your friends together. your ex who you never really got over helps make costumes, shyly puts makeup on you, your best friend’s gf promotes it on her massively successful blog. the public mostly cares about it because you were in it and you’re the kind of famous that doesn’t ever go away. you WISH it would go away. but then you try to see the bright side of it. your best friend is so happy people like his short film. he gets an A for the class. you accidentally get another friend even MORE heavily considered for the job she’s been talking about non stop all week because you mentioned knowing her. you get pressured into doing a film because they say they’ll give your best friend an important role on the crew. little by little it all builds up and this is just your career now

-> but you find little ways to take control. you realize you get to decide who works with you and for you and you see your Good Best Friend Ex who just started complaining about how little the internship she’s doing pays. you think you could take away her pain so easily. and it makes it all less painful for you. it’s such an even trade. but then your Partner Against Magic Crime starts taking up more of your time and you realize you WANT all the time that you can get, and having Something To Do In The Day becomes an absolute chore again, and maybe you don’t care how happy it could make the public and how Excited your fans will be

-> this manifests in all the little asides you see in tvl where he Suggests quitting his job all the time and Thinks about it a lot

-> At the same time. who doesn’t wanna quit their job. he’s just a little guy. surely he’s worked enough for several lifetimes

#ask #tvl #ALSO SORRY TO THE PEOPLEBWHOBI SCARED IN MY LAst post #ILL BE MORE CATEFUL W HOW I TALK ABOUT NEW CHAPTERS I LROMISE

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thewritersaddictions · 7 months

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The Brown-Eyed Man: Joel Miller- Log 1 Texas

Pairing: Joel Miller x Fem!Reader

Pov: Reader

Summary: After getting settled into your new neighborhood. You get a knock on your door late at night. A tall, dark man stands there, and you wonder if your life is about to flip upside down.

Warnings: Flirting, angst, fluff, moving away, abusive ex-boyfriend, stalker ex-boyfriend, offering drinks, drinking, age difference, sarah miller mentioned, and Tommy Miller mentioned.

A/n- @ Firefly-graphics for dividers

WC- 2.0k

The Last Of Us Master List // The Brown-Eyed Man Series Master List

Log 2 Here

The doorbell ringing at my front door brings me out of the box I’m digging in. The boxes line the walls of my hallways and many of the rooms that have yet to be unpacked. I look down at my watch. It’s nearly ten thirty at night, but I open the front door anyway. “Hello?” I say as I look up; the rest of what I was going to say gets caught in the back of my throat.

The man standing before me is tall and muscular, even if he’s wearing a pair of what looks like old sweatpants and a tight black shirt. He’s got caramel skin and a devilish jawline. “Hey there, neighbor. I just wanted to welcome you to the neighborhood.” His voice is smooth like honey, making me weak to my knees.

“Names Joel, by the way… that would be weird if I just came up to your front door and welcomed you to the neighborhood without telling you my name.” His voice is so fucking soothing in a calming sort of way. “I… thank you, Joel.”I managed to get out without sounding like a complete and utter idiot. He can’t be much older than me, as I can see the gray strands starting at the edges of his hair. “I live other there.” Joel points out.

He lives right across from me. “I just saw that you were movin’ in. Just wanted to be a good neighbor and say that you’re welcome to come over for beers or talk whenever you want.” Joel said with a smile.

As Joel walks down the front porch stairs, I realize that, like an idiot, I’ve forgotten to tell him anything about myself, “Hang on.” I yell into the crisp night air.” He pauses a few steps, still waiting before him; turning, something catches my eye. Maybe it’s the glint in his eyes as he drags them up my body or the way he still towers over you, even from down on the steps.

I shake the dirty thoughts from my mind and do the neighborly thing. “You’ve told me your name, but I haven’t told you mine.” He chuckles and takes a few steps to meet me at eye level. I swipe my tongue over my drying lips, bringing my hand out to shake his. “Names, Y/n,” I say with a sweet smile written on my face.

His hands are so much larger than mine, rough in spots that I didn’t know your hands could get rough in. Callusses pressed up against my soft skin send shivers down my spine. His hand is firm against mine, and then again, so is the handshake itself. “Well, it’s lovely to meet you, Y/n.” There’s that glint in his eyes again.

Yet the smile on his face doesn’t this close up reach up to the sky. For now, though, even as Joel walks down the rest of my steps and into the street, the echo of my name from his voice has me standing there like a puppet. Completely drawn into him.

That was the reason I had moved to Texas. I needed to escape the screaming street and the fluorescent lights of the city; the crowded streets and rude people were the last straw. I had bent and stayed for college. I just needed to finish my degree before I was okay with moving out alone, away from my childhood home and city.

Texas seemed like the best place. It was calm, rural, and everything I needed for a good hard reset. It wasn’t just the streets and people I was trying to escape. My past clung to me like a nats during summer.

Relationships have never really been in the cards for me, I was too busy with after-school activities or the school itself. There wasn’t time for the nerdy girl to get a boyfriend, and it wasn’t like the guys were exactly putting themselves in my path. It was a lonely four years in high school, which I only thought would transfer over into my college years.

I watched as Joel made his way over to his front porch. He waved once more before opening his door and closing it. I stared a little longer, standing on one of the steps of my porch. I felt stupid. A stupid crush that had grown in mere seconds from the man just knocking on my door. He had invited me over for drinks, and much as I didn’t want to play into how my heart beat harder while Joel’s hand was wrapped around mine. The frustration of unpacking and getting to my job in the next few weeks pulled me closer to the thought.

When I finally made my way back up the flight of stairs and behind my front door, I took the first breath I think I’ve taken since the doorbell rang. The clock on the oven reads nearly eleven in the morning. The boxes strewn across my kitchen and living room floor are becoming a nuisance to me. One of the boxes in the kitchen is torn open in search of my coffee marker this morning.

As I turn off lights around my house, I get lost in the thought of him. Of his words and his rough touch against my soft skin. I walk down the hallways in complete darkness, my head filled with light and fluttering thoughts of Joel. I can feel the heavy dew that makes my eyes ache in need of sleep by the time I make it to my bedroom. As I get ready for bed, I pull back the sheets, brushing my teeth.

My thoughts betray me for another time. I can see him perfectly. His broad shoulders and that sharp jawline. It’s all I can think about as I get ready for bed. Thoughts follow me as I slip under the weight of the duvet and flat sheet.

Even my dreams betray me.

Before my dreams can take me away, the buzzing of my phone on the nightstand beside me pulls me away. In the shadows of the night, I reach over, patting the table. “You can’t ignore me forever, Y/n.” The text is bright on my scene. He's always right there no matter how hard I try to escape my past. Stalking me forever now. Brad the hip, society house leader at our modern college. I had caught his eye, and I was caught in his trap. Even as a freshman, it all felt wrong how fast everything went. He was never gentle or soft with me. Never caring about the things I yearned to be doing instead of standing next to him at another house party.

Did some guys just not understand boundaries did they not understand hundrends of miles meant that I was done with you, or did Brad understand and he just choose to be a complete and utter dick in every fashion of the word. I stare at the text, and just as I go to swipe it away another comes. “Come on Y/n, you know better then this.” I can hear his voice echoing with anger as he types angrily into his phones screen.

I set my phone down on this face, turning away from the buzzing, and vibrations opting for staring out my bedroom window into the beautiful scenery outside. I can see the truck in Joels driveway. “Miller construction” is written on the side of it. “Joel Miller.” The words follow together and right out of my mouth, and for a moment I’m not thinking about Brad, or how he’s becoming a rather tough thorn in my side. Joel takes over my thoughts once again and I forget all about my buzzing phone.

I don’t know how I managed toget up to Joels front door. Where my feet kept walking and my mind was left behind. Hell maybe it’s sitting next to my coffee cup as my coffee brews. It’s earlier then afternoon, but I still feel bad when joel answers the door in the same clothes from the night before. “Good mornin’ Y/n.” His voice is somehow thicker, and for a moment the time catches up with me. “Shit, I didn’t even. I’ll leave you be Joel.” I say tumbling over my words, and my feet. Landing with a pop of my ass at he bottom of his front porch stiars. The clamber of heavy foot steps shaking the hurt my aching head.

Joel is right at my side. “Holy shit, darlin’ that was uh stumble now.” He says with a bit of a chuckle in his rough morning voice. His hands are sprawled against my shoulder blades, and the other is taking my hand helping me up. “You doin’ alright?” He asks lowering down to look me right in the eyes. I can’t tell if it the tumble, or because Joel is so close but my head feels so dizzy.

“My head, just a little dizzy. Let me catch my…” My words are cut short by a dominant and sharp grasps that Joel has on my wrist. “You don’t even start with that shit now. You’re coming in and I’m gonna make sure you’re okay.” Joel says. It’s not a suggestion, and you don’t even care that Joel doesn’t really know you and he’s already bossing your around. Joel walks you into his house. The smell of wood, and coffee hits my nose at first, and he sets me down on the couches edge. “So what had you comin’ over at nearly ten in the morning?” The drawl in Joels voice keeps the dizzy feeling in my head away. “I was… you offered drinks.” The words finally leave my mouth and for a second I can breath.

“That’s quite alright dear.” Joels voice is soothing so much that the buzzing in my back pocket I can’t manager to give a single fuck. Joel offers me a cold sweating glass of water, “This is all for drinks until maybe a few days from now. If you got hurt form that fall you might not wanna drink.” Joel says until his brows arches, “Are you gonna get your phone?” He asks, I shake my head. I want to say ‘I’m in much better company then the one on the phone.’ I don’t though, “I’d rather not talk to him.” I shake my head at myself. I exposes myself in a new and totally irritating way. “Him?” Joels asks, there’s a dark hue behind his brown eyes. “Just an ex, who doesn’t get the words ‘We are done.’” I manageto get out with a chuckles as the water soothes the banging in my head. “Is that your daughter?” I ask into the silence of the room, the pictures on the walls show a happy, kinda happy, and then broken family. “My daughter and my soon to be ex-wife.” Joel answers.

“Relationship issues am I right?” I say laughing a litte to hard that it causes my head to hurt. Joel chuckles, “Yeha you’ve got me there Y/n.” Joel mutters as we get back into comfortable silence. “She’s just starting her last year of high school.” Joel adds, “Her names Sarah, she’s smart as a whip. Kicks my ass in pretty much everything.” Joel smiles fondly as he talk about his daughter. “Your truck? Is that what you do for work?” I ask pushing further not caring if he shuts down and pushes me out of his front door because for right now I’m getting to know my neighbor like I always should have. “Yeah, the names pretty self explanatory.” Joel laughs a tight lipped smile writte over his older features.

“Here, I’ll give you my card,” Joel says as he gets up quickly, pulling out his wallet. Pulling out a pretty sleek black and purple card. His name and number are written on one, and the other has everything he does within construction. “You just call me whenever you need me.”Joel offers. I can’t help but smile at him. “I will, Joel, don’t worry. You’ll be the first call whenever I’ve got issues with my appliances.”

Completed on: 09/16/23

Posted on: 09/18/23

The Last Of Us-

#joel miller the last of us #joel miller fic #joel miller x reader #joel miller eventually smut #joel miller tlou #joel miller smut #fluff #fem reader #female reader #requests are open #open requests #requests open #joel miller #tlou hbo #tommy miller #the last of us hbo #the last of us #joel tlou #dilf joel miller

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vi-sigoth · 5 months

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how did you come to be able to trust and believe in men not to betray, hurt, or degrade you over time? i've never been in a situation where i was surrounded by "cuck" leftists as you say, and while i agree those men are awful in their own way, i'm also wary of right leaning men that tend to hide a general sense of contempt for women. a common example i have on my mind often is higher IQ men who willingly marry women who are significantly or at least noticeably lower IQ because they don't believe or care if there are women closer to them in ability, and they enjoy having such control and influence over their wives or live-in girlfriends. there's more but i don't want to throw you a wall of text lol

So, there’s really no good answer to this. I can tell you my own experience, but my life and yours are probably very different.

I have absolutely noticed a lot of conservative men marrying women who are lower IQ, (and tons of “racist” white men marrying poorer Hispanic, Asian, and even black women, which…we don’t have time to unpack all of that).

I would say—keep your heart open. But have your hand on the gate, ready to slam it shut and lock it when you see a red flag. I think a lot of women, because we tend to be more agreeable and less inclined towards hurting feelings with men maybe are afraid of asking the more difficult questions towards the beginning of the relationship (although I think that both men and women nowadays suck really hard at communicating with each other). There are some things you need to ask about that people don’t like—because they’re pragmatic and not very romantic, but in my opinion, women should be asking—

1. What are your religious/moral/ethical views?

My husband and I are the same religion. He and I discussed it very soon after meeting each other. I know that some people like to say that people who are extremely religious probably don’t get divorced because they’re afraid of the shame and stigma, blah blah blah, but I don’t buy that entirely. I think people who’s religious views (which inform your morality and ethics) don’t get divorced as much as non-religious people because their worldviews simply align more and because of that, they’re able to build more harmonious marriages. Going back to Conservative men marrying lower IQ women — I’ve noticed a bizarre trend, mostly with the older generations, of Conservative men marrying liberal women, or marrying women that have a different religion than them. It’s because those men in particular don’t care very much about their wife as a fully-fledged human being. Who cares, let her have her silly worldviews, as long as dinner is on the table; women are stupid anyway, I’d only talk politics with the boys down at the bar—type mindset. Make men tell you their religious views. How do those views inform the way they think about women and the treatment of a wife?

2. What are your thoughts on sex? Is it appropriate to go to strip clubs? To look at porn? Will you ever ask me to swing/have a threesome? How kinky are you in bed? Do you like doing anything in bed that would be considered outside of the norm?

Now this—people REALLY don’t want to talk about this. I’m going to be mega-cringe and cite Jordan Peterson here, but he was absolutely right when he said that nowadays, young men and women do things in bed that they can’t talk about with each other. But you HAVE to talk about sex with each other. I promise, it’ll save you massive heartbreak down the road. Can you imagine being nineteen and staring deep into the eyes of your boyfriend and thinking about how much you love him, only for him to completely blindside you and ask you to have a threesome? Haha. Yeah. (I said no). Talk about sex now, even if you are waiting until after marriage, you can absolutely discuss the act even if you haven’t done it yet. How many times a week does he expect sex? My now husband and I discussed this, and we both unequivocally agreed that strip clubs are out of the question, as is porn watching, and neither of us want to bring other people into our bedroom. We are also on the same page about which sex acts are fine, and which ones are gross and never happening. If guy is pissy about any of this or unwilling to answer or discuss this, major red flag. What it typically means is that he’s already doing those things or wants to do them in the future and doesn’t want to make a promise that he won’t do them knowing full well he won’t keep it. Don’t ever let a guy make you feel like you’re crazy, stupid, or nagging for putting your foot down about pornography and strip clubs. He engages in that shit? Drop him. Men need to be behaving better, but we, as women, also need to be more active in punishing men for bad behavior. Also, ask how will he feel if for some reason you’re sick or recovering from childbirth and you can’t have sex with him for a few months? He understands that there might be periods of time when that happens, yes?

3. How will you contribute domestically? What will our split be?

Whichever person works less hours out of the house does more housework. Period, the end. He knows how to do dishes, do his own laundry, cook reasonably well, and clean a bathroom, right? He better. You also need clear affirmation that he understands that just because a woman stays at home, doesn’t mean they just sit around and do nothing all day. If you are a stay at home mother, he’s going to step in at night when he gets home and parent his children to give you some downtime, and he’ll help you with household chores at night that you might not have been able to get done because you might have been too tied up with taking care of kids? The answer to that better be yes. Make sure he’s not one of those guys that think that all he has to do is go to work and come home, and NOTHING else.

So yeah, I would say, I came to start liking and trusting the men around me a lot more by making sure that I was thoroughly vetting the ones that were interested in me romantically. My husband showed me that he was loyal and trustworthy while he was still my boyfriend because, not only he did he agree with me about all the above things, but he showed me by his kind, sweet, and thoughtful actions. Not only does he agree with me about splitting domestic labor (we both work the same hours outside the house at the moment) he actually does it. He helps with grocery shopping, making our lunches, making dinner, taking care of my cat, as just a few examples. A man who loves you will always show you.

#long post #anonymous #sorry for the constant long posting

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unhappycylinder · 1 year

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Gonna Be Trouble (Jake ‘Hangman’ Seresin x F!Reader) Part 1

Jake ‘Hangman’ Seresin x Female Reader

Word Count: 3049

Warnings: none really, just some anxiety about school ig (reader is in college), flirty hangman, awkward reader, fluff and flirting to a concerningly self-indulgent point

Summary: Y/n goes back to her hometown airshow to escape the stress of school for a weekend and reconnect with her childhood passion. Hangman just happens to be a demo pilot at this same air show and falls for y/n instantly. Part 1 of idk how many but this will be ongoing and will move beyond the airshow pretty quickly. Strangers to lovers arc. Hangman is a sucker for a smart woman what can I say...

Part 2 Part 3

The sun was just setting under the desert horizon and you still had an hour and a half before you were back in Las Vegas. You had moved away to go to college three years ago and were looking for literally any excuse to escape the hell-hole that was university and reconnect with yourself. Years of books, essays, exams, and frat parties had taken their toll on you and your health (and your liver but we don’t have to unpack that yet because you literally turned 21 a month ago).

Anyway…even though planes weren’t your main thing anymore, you still loved them. Everyone has a soft spot for their childhood obsession. Most kids loved dinosaurs or the Titanic or horses, but not you, no…the American military’s aviation department really tickled your fancy when you were in elementary school. You even wanted to be a pilot for a while, contemplated joining the Navy and everything, but your family’s academic goals put a stop to that pretty quickly.

There was a quaint hotel within a few miles of base that you opted for instead, deciding to take the shuttle to and from the air show each day.

As your music played quietly over the car radio you finally got some time alone with your thoughts. Time to unpack all the crazy shit that had happened to you since college started, and time to think about what was next for you after you graduated next year. You decided that you were going to focus on yourself this weekend and nobody else. You’d silence your phone, try not to take pictures and post much on Instagram, and for the love of God you’d leave your barren dating apps alone cause lord knows nothing was gonna happen there.

“Love Me Tonight” came on the radio and you turned up the volume, swaying to one of your favorite songs as you passed the final mountain and saw Las Vegas in the distance, sighing in relief that your 15 hour day had finally come to an end.

–The Next Morning–

You only heard two gunshots outside your hotel last night, which to be fair was pretty chill for a night in Vegas, and the sunrise indicated that it was time for you to start getting ready for your day on base. You wanted to beat the crowd so you could have time to check out all the static displays before trying to find a seat in front of the runway.

Throwing on an outfit of leggings and a tight black long-sleeve with a denim bomber jacket on top, you finished getting ready before leaving your hotel room.

Hopping on the shuttle, you realized the only open seat was next to a man in his 70s wearing a Vietnam War Veteran ball cap who was blankly staring out the window with a slight frown on his face.

“Excuse me sir,” you said, “can I sit here?”

He perked up almost instantly and shuffled lightly towards the window, patting the seat gently and smiling up at you.

“Of course honey, it’d be a pleasure”

“Are you here with your family, or is it just you today?” You asked, leaning in to make sure he heard you

“Just me I’m afraid. My grandkids all live out of state and well my wife passed not too long ago. It’s just me now, and I haven’t missed one of these shows in years” he nodded

You smiled at him and nodded, “Me too. I used to come every year as a kid and this is my first time back since starting college”

“Oh how wonderful! What do you study?”

You and the old man chatted for what felt like half an hour but was really only the 10 minute ride to base. His name was Hank and he served two tours of Vietnam when he was 19. He met his wife, Marlee, a couple months after the war at an air show in California where he was promoting a veterans organization and they were married for forty-five years. He asked you about college, family, your interest in planes, and complimented you any chance he got. When the bus parked he struggled to get up, pulling out a cane from in between the seats and trying his best to wiggle his way out of the bus until you grabbed ahold of his other arm and helped him off the vehicle and through the air show gates.

“You know y/n you remind me an awful lot of my wife when I first met her. She looked just like you…” he paused, studying your face, “did her hair the same way, talked the same way you do”

“Aw thank you Hank that’s really kind,” you brought your hand to your chest and smiled at him, he beamed back.

“You know I hope you get to experience a life like me and my Marlee did, I just know it’ll happen for you”

You thanked him again and smiled, it was a sweet thing for him to say and you didn’t have the heart to tell him your only romantic endeavors thus far had been one-night-stands off of bumble. He smiled once again and shook your hand, hobbling off with his cane towards a C-5 parked right in front of the gate.

“And y/n,” he said while walking away, “enjoy the air show”

–

A-10s, F-15s, F-16s, F-35s, a B-1, and so many more aircraft that defined your childhood lined the runway along with the frequent hot dog and pretzel vendors. You wandered past each plane, circling them to check out their engines and empennages, taking special note of all the specs and features you used to obsess over as a kid.

“Any questions over here ma’am?” a tall brunette in camo and aviators asked you from beneath the wing of the A-10.

“Oh god, I don’t think so. This was my favorite plane as a kid and I’m just kinda reminiscing about it now,” you responded, squinting from the sun which was over the plane right now

“She’s my favorite too, I mean I’d hope she was cause I fly her, but y’a know”

“What’s it like to fly ‘em?”

“Magnificent ma’am, truly indescribable,” he said while walking closer to you

“I’ll ask you a question about them then if they were your favorite as a kid, how’s that sound ma’am?” He asked, you laughed

“Jeez okay go ahead, hit me with it”

“Alright, how many pounds-” he was cut off by a little kid running up and playing with the ‘remove before flight’ tags on the aircraft

“Excuse me miss” he said in a hurry as he ran to the child and politely but sternly asked him to stop fiddling with the aircraft. You chuckled and shook your head as you walked quickly behind the plane.

It was then that your eye was caught by the most magnificent thing you had ever seen in your entire life. You must have skipped over this part in the brochure online, because nothing would have enticed you more than the U.S. Navy’s very own F/A-18 Super Hornet. If the A-10 was your favorite plane as a kid, the F/A-18 might as well have been the reason you considered a career in the military or pursued anything aviation related at all. This plane was your absolute dream, and you had zero clue one was going to be here.

Completely forgetting your trivia game with the A-10 pilot, you practically ran over to the jet, shedding your jacket in the process. It was still early in the day and this bird was the last display on the lot, so nobody else was in sight. You dropped your jacket to the ground as you approached the jet, scanning every single inch of it, especially the name painted on the side below the cockpit:

Jake ‘Hangman’ Seresin

Your eyes were wide as you walked the length of the wing, hovering your hand over the grey metal, being afraid to touch it and damage it. As you got behind the wing however you noticed the beautiful dark blue Navy logo and simply couldn’t resist reaching out to trace your fingers along the gold ribboning which encircled the logo. Just as you made contact with the jet a voice erupted from behind you, making you jump.

“Scuse me ma’am,” it was said in the most delectable Southern drawl you’d ever heard

“Jesus Christ!” You yelled, turning around and immediately shrinking into yourself.

Standing before you was God’s very own favorite creation…literally the most beautiful man you had ever seen. He was in a dark green flight suit and aviators with his dark blonde hair slicked back from a side part. He twirled a toothpick in his mouth, which was twitched into a seductive smile as he peered down at you.

“Sorry,” you struggled to get out, turning red in the face, “I’m so sorry, I don’t know what I was thinking,” you turned back towards the wing and started walking to pick up your jacket from the nasty ground. A strong hand grabbed a hold of your upper arm before you could take more than a step.

“Darlin’ it's okay, sorry I startled you, didn’t realize you didn’t see me coming up behind you”

He pulled you back in front of him and kept his hand gently on your shoulder, you almost combusted from his touch.

“I’m really sorry, I didn’t mean to yell, or to touch the jet, I seriously don’t know what got into me. I mean I just watched a kid get yelled at for doing basically the same thing and now here I am, a grown woman, doing the same exact thing, feeling up the aircraft.” You rambled and he just smiled, letting out a little chuckle here and there, “I don’t mean feeling it up, not like that. Sorry. I mean touching it. I shouldn’t touch government property, that’s a lawsuit waiting to happen…”

“I’m gonna cut you off now darlin’,” he interjected while rubbing your shoulder, “no need to apologize for feeling up my jet, I get it, I feel her up all the time” he winced at his comment.

“...your jet. You’re the pilot?”

“I’d hope so, last I checked that was my name up there on her cockpit”

You both glanced up to the name then down to his name patch on his suit…they did indeed match.

“Lieutenant Jake Seresin ma’am, callsign Hangman,” he removed his hand from your shoulder and held it out for you to shake it

“Y/n Y/l/n” you responded, placing your smaller hand in his and giving it a firm shake. He glanced down at your hands as you shook them.

“You got a strong handshake there miss y/l/n, you sure you’re not in the military?”

You chuckled, “no sir, thought about it, but no. I guess I just have big hands?”

You held your hands up in front of you and wiggled your fingers, making Jake laugh.

“C’mere,” Jake said as he stepped towards the jet where you had been looking earlier, motioning for you to follow.

“She’s an F/A-18E Super Hornet, but we like to call them-”

“The Rhino,” you cut him off, looking up at him with wide eyes

“So you’re a plane nerd, huh?” Jake asked, leaning against the fuselage of his jet

“Sorry. I used to be. These were my dream plane, I always wanted to fly them”

“You can touch it,” Jake smiled at you, you were still standing a good 2 feet from the jet, afraid to get any closer.

“No really it's okay, I don’t need to-”

“Come here,” Jake grabbed your right hand and pulled you towards him as he rested against the plane. You two stood there face to face for a second, inches from each other, hands interlocked, before Jake stood behind you and lifted your hands to touch the Navy logo together. His large calloused hand rested on top of yours as he guided your hands in a circle around the logo, his chest bumping into your back when you had to reach a little farther to touch the top of it.

“It’s a beautiful jet lieutenant” you said as you touched the plane, you felt his breath hitch when you said that last word. You looked over your shoulder to face him, his face inches from yours, his eyes more visible now through his sunglasses.

“You sticking around for the whole day?” He asked, removing his hand from yours and resting it against the jet so you were between him and the jet, enclosed by his arm.

“Yeah, yeah, I’m here both days all day” you said, looking up at him, blushing beyond belief. How you were functioning right now was beyond you.

“Good. I’m gonna be taking her up in a few hours and I’d love for you to watch me. Maybe after I land we could go out for a drink,” he smirked, twirling the toothpick with his tongue to the other side of his mouth. God this man was doing unspeakable things to you.

“Are you asking me on a date?” You said with absolute disbelief, chuckling as if it was a joke. No part of you could believe that an actual in-person man was asking you out for the first time, and it was even more unfathomable that that man was the sexiest fighter pilot in the entire U.S. Navy.

“I suppose I am miss y/l/n, if you’d have me,” he said, his confidence wavering the slightest bit after your response.

“I can’t believe it. There’s no way! Look at you!” You gestured up and down to him

“Look at me? Darlin’ you must not have a mirror cause all I’m seeing in front of me is pure beauty. You’re gorgeous sweetheart, and damn smart too” Jake brought his hand off the plane to fix a stray hair that had stuck to your lip gloss, tucking it behind your ear.

“I-” you began but you couldn’t seem to form the words, “Yeah, yes. You’re perfect. Drinks after you fly, I’ll be there.” That was apparently the most coherent thing you could come up with.

Jake smiled a million dollar smile and took his sunglasses off his face, resting them on the zipper of his suit. His eyes were a gorgeous light green and they creased at the sides when he smiled, making you absolutely melt. He bent down until his mouth was right next to your ear, his warm breath sending chills down your neck.

“I’m looking forward to it Y/n,” he practically growled, “meet me back here after the demo,” he planted a soft kiss on your cheekbone as he pulled his head back, winking at you once you finally got the courage to make eye contact with him.

All you could do was smile and nod as Jake walked away and returned with your jacket,

“Don’t want you forgetting this darlin’, gotta stay warm, don’t want you catching a cold before our date,” he beamed.

You smiled up at him as you took your jacket, intentionally running your hand down his as you took the fabric, making his eyes widen and stare deeper into yours.

“You’re gonna be trouble for me, I can already tell,” he smirked and spun on his heels, walking over to a family approaching the nose of the aircraft. You stood behind the wing clasping your jacket in front of you, too shocked to move or think.

“What the actual fuck,” you whispered as you shook your head and started walking towards the stratotanker to the left of the jet. You fixed your hair as you walked, fiddling with the strands to alleviate your anxiety about whatever just occurred. Jake focused on the way your ass moved under those leggings as you walked away from his jet, completely ignoring the kid in front of him asking him a gazillion questions about his plane. He was right, you were definitely going to be trouble for him.

----

This is just part 1!! Let me know what y’all think. This is my first time posting a fic to tumblr so pls drop suggestions below!! Part 2 coming soon

#jake seresin #jake seresin x reader #jake 'hangman' seresin #jake 'hangman' seresin x reader #top gun fic #top gun maverick #top gun #navy

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away-ward · 1 year

Text

Make No Apologies, part 3

Master List

Emory

Present

Was I excited to be told I was explicitly requested on a project? Yes. And no. It’s not the first time it’s happened, but it’s always a compliment.

The excitement turned to stone-cold fear when I learned of the location. Thunder Bay was the last place I wanted to be. Nothing good happened to me here. And walking into the conference room proved it.

If I could get out of it, I would have. Short of dying or quitting, there was nothing I could do to get out of working on the project. That told me everything I needed to know about who made the request. Only so many names out of Thunder Bay could hold that much sway in California.

“So, this is home?” Elise asked as we packed up our stuff at the end of the day. We had completed the designs for the new gazebo and sent it over for them to approve in the morning.

“This is home,” I confirmed, shouldering my leather laptop bag.

Byron came around my side. “Has it changed much?”

“I don’t know. I haven’t been outside yet.” We arrived and came here directly from the airport in Meridian. I couldn’t look at anything as we drove in, too on edge to see what had changed.

And what hadn’t.

We trailed behind Brett and Elliot to the SUV that was provided. We were all staying at a hotel in the area – one of the Torrance’s, no doubt. That made me nervous, like living in a pit of snakes. But I’d rather be there than at the house.

“Where’s the best place to get a bite around here?” Byron asked.

I laughed. “Sticks.”

Elise made a face, joking that it sounded like a dive bar. “Close,” I answered. I didn’t want to tell them I hardly ever went there or about my life before San Fran. My experiences wouldn’t match up with what they were expecting to hear about small-town life.

They continued to ask about the area, wanting to explore it and get a feel for the real Thunder Bay, their home for the next month or so. I held firm in my resolve to stay in my hotel room. No chance was I leaving the security of four solid walls and a door between me and them.

I wasn’t dumb enough to believe this was about ‘honoring the town’ and ‘staying true to Thunder Bay.’ This was Will’s doing. His threat hung over my head for years, and he was finally cashing it in.

He looked good. I hated him for that. He always had one of those faces. Nice. Attractive. The years of drugs, booze, and girls did nothing to detract from that, damn him. He looked healthy, actually. And the muscles...even beneath the suit jacket, I could see the outline of round biceps and pecs. He didn’t play sports any longer, as far as I knew. Unless the occasional round of pool or a pick-up basketball game counted as a sport.

That’s just what good genetics get you. Good genetics, and a whole bunch of daddy's money.

/-/-/

At the hotel, we dived up the room keys. Elise and I would share a double, Byron got a single, and Brett and Elliot shared the penthouse suite with two separate bedrooms. The suite would be our temporary headquarters when we weren’t working at Damon’s firm.

Damon’s firm. Ugh. When did that happen? He never once showed an ounce of interest in design and construction, but suddenly, he became a big name in the field. I have nearly a decade of work behind me, but he gets to start his own firm within a few years of getting out of prison. Okkkaaay.

Not that I'm jealous. Not at all. I just want to tear the whole thing to the ground and get the hell out of Dodge. Maybe then they'd get the message to leave me alone.

Elise and I settled in our room. I deposited my luggage on the bed farthest from the door, leaving her one closest to the bathroom. She spent more time in there, anyway.

“You sure you don’t want to come out,” she asked, freshening her makeup in the mirror in the room as I unpacked my suitcase. She’d already changed out of her professional clothes. I was planning to get straight into my pajamas.

“No, you guys go.”

She gave me a sad but understanding smile. The same one she always gave me when I didn’t join them back home. What can I say, I’m still not big on joining.

Once she left, I changed, pulling on my cotton shorts and matching long-sleeve top. October wasn’t cold, exactly, but it could get chilly out. Setting up at the desk in the room, I pulled up my laptop and continued working on some of the other projects I had started before being dragged away.

I was in the middle of a design when my phone screen lit up with a message. I swallowed. There, like, three people it could be, and none of them I wanted to talk to. When I finally convinced myself to pick up the phone and check the message, I saw it was from a blocked number.

I relaxed. Only one person called me from a blocked number. My eyes scanned the empty room before opening the text message.

‘I want you’

My breath came out heavy through my nose, and I ground my teeth together. Images of lying with my back on the carpet floor in his office, his pants pulled down just enough, and a week of rug rash for ten minutes of pleasure flashed through my head.

I put an end to that. Leaving San Francisco didn’t change anything.

Putting the phone back down without answering, I tried returning to work. The screen lit up again, and again I exhaled, glaring at the device.

‘It’s going to be a long four weeks'

‘Stop.’ I shot back.

The phone rang. When I didn’t answer, Brett left a message. Against my better judgment, I pressed play.

A heavy breath. “Ems," he cooed, and I grimaced at the nickname.

We were once comfortable, Brett and me. It was fun. Our arrangement was easy. He was separated from his wife; I wanted no strings. But then he returned to her, and it no longer made sense.

He only pulled this shit on trips now, as rare as they were. And was never because he wanted me, really. He wanted quick and easy, and at least with me, there were no expectations.

Brett called again. Rolling my lips, fighting with myself, I answer, pressing the phone to my ear. I allow my silence to ring loudly over the line.

“I’m sorry,” he said first, and I almost fell for it. “But four whole weeks, Em. I’m already going crazy over here.”

“Call your wife,” I told him.

“Don’t be like this.”

“Like what, a decent human?”

“I said I was sorry, okay.”

I shook my head. That didn’t make it better because he was still asking. And even if I wanted to, I couldn’t. Something about being in Thunder Bay made that one betrayal too far.

“Let me see you,” Brett continued. “Meet me in the restaurant downstairs. We’ll have dinner and put it on the firm’s card. No strings.”

I didn’t even need to think about it. “No,” I said, hanging up. I put the phone face down and returned to the laptop, but my motivation had disappeared.

Closing it, I pushed away from the desk. The window was closed so that I couldn’t see the lights of the town. It had only been two hours since Elise left, so I didn’t expect her any time soon. I hoped Thunder Bay was treating her well. Better than it had ever treated me, at least.

Laying across the bed, I flipped through the TV channels, looking for anything to fill the silence. There was always a movie I could pass the time with. Finding something, I stretched out and got comfortable, realizing this would be my life for the next few weeks, and I might as well get used to it.

I zoned into the movie, finally relaxing by putting Brett and everyone else out of my head. It was perfect until a knock at the door during an intense action scene had me jumping in my spot. Grabbing the remote, I muted the TV and waited. It could be anyone – Elise, having forgotten her card. That would be the best case. Actually, the best case would be if someone had the wrong room.

Brett would be the most logical option. I hadn’t looked at my phone since putting it down. He probably came to see if he could persuade me in person.

Another knock. Three slow, intentional raps against the wood. I slid silently from the bed and approached, standing on my toes to see through the peephole. All I got was black. Whoever they were, they were smart enough to hold their finger over the viewfinder.

The possibilities were dwindling, as were my options. I knew I should keep the door closed and hope he went away.

“Emory.” My guts twisted at the sound of his voice, and my breath froze in my lungs. He hadn’t said anything during the meeting or after. The hold that just one word had over me was insane.

I pulled open the door, a shot of heat flooding my body at the sight of Will. He leaned forward, one arm braced on the door frame above his head. The suit jacket he wore earlier was gone, leaving him in black slacks and a white shirt, unbuttoned at the neck and the sleeves rolled. In the light of the hall, I was able to see the tattoos that spanned across the slight opening and disappeared on both sides of his collarbone. On his arms, too, were a collection of images and words that I couldn't decipher at the moment.

“Expecting someone else?”

I held out a hand out a hand to stop him. “Will. You shouldn’t be here.”

He moved off the frame, stepping into the room. “Byron or Brett, maybe? Both?” I backed away as he shut the door, closing us inside. “Be honest with me; how many have there been over the years.”

A part of me was thankful he came in angry and aggressive. Will being mean was something I could handle. It was when he was nice that I stumbled.

“Why,” I taunted, “you want to swap stats?”

One dark eyebrow lifted, he drifted forward with a calm ease. “Be honest for once in your life, and I might be a little forgiving.”

“You can’t be serious,” I scoffed.

“Oh, baby, you have no idea.”

“While we’re on the topic of body counts, how’s Heidi? Bet she's just loving the life of a trophy wife.”

He followed me in the limited space until I’d been backed up to the bed I claimed as mine. I refused to sit, to let him tower over me even more. So even as he got close enough that my chest brushed the front of his shirt, I didn’t lower.

Satisfaction sparked in his green eyes. “Oh, she’s good. She takes real good care of me. But I’m tired of blonde.” He took a lock of my hair, rubbing it between his fingers and thumb. “Answer me, Emory.”

My stomach dropped. “Is this all you are? After all this time.” I couldn’t believe it. He’s out of prison. He’s got a job. His life is back on track. Why had he waited all this time? “Please tell me there’s more to you than this.”

“I told you. You’re going to pay back what you owe.”

I kept my glare trained on him, even as I felt his hand brush my shoulder and the skin of my neck. He stopped at my nape. I looked into his eyes, and for half a second, I let myself believe he’d let me go. Then his eyes hardened, fist tightened, and he hauled me forward until I could feel his breath against my lips. Growling, he pushed us back. We both fell on the bed, me under him; his knees braced my thighs.

“How many others have had you like this?” He breathed on my neck. “You always had so many excuses, but only for me, huh? Not for anyone else.”

He still didn’t understand how hard it was. “Will, get off!” I shoved at him. It made no difference. His lips connected to my jaw as he moved over me, and I had to bite back a moan at the fire that lit in my veins.

With one hand still around my neck, he moved around my face to my mouth, taking my bottom lip between his teeth; his other hand went to my hip and pulled at my cotton shorts. “You told me your ass was up for grabs, remember? So what’s the problem now? Still ashamed of me all these years later?”

No. Not of you.

“I did everything," he growled. I gasped as his hand got to my bare ass, grabbing it tight as he moved my body to his liking. “I left you alone. I partied my heart and brain out. I got clean. I’m big and powerful, just like you said I’d be. We did everything your way for ten years. Tell me why I can't have my turn.”

“Will, I-” My breath hitched.

He stopped, staring down at me, lips tightened and brow drawn. I could see the anger on the surface and underneath that, all the pain. As if disconnected from the rest of my body, I watched my hand lift toward his cheek. As if my touch could soothe away that pain.

I can’t solve his problem. I am his problem. We're each other's problem.

I pulled back before my palm could touch him.

“Afraid to face the mess you created?”

Yes.

He pushed himself off, and it felt like I was floating without his weight pressing into me. Stupidly, I missed the warmth of his body.

After catching my breath, I pulled myself up to meet Will’s glare.

“Here’s how it’s going to go,” he said. “You’re going to pack your bags and leave with me.”

I snorted, ready to tell him he could get fucked, but he continued.

“And for the next four weeks, you will do everything I wanted. Do you remember?”

Everything he wanted? I forced a lump down my throat. Of course, I remembered. “Everything?” I asked. Some things just weren’t going to work according to his plans. Can't have a baby in four weeks.

“Four weeks won't make up for the nearly three years I lost, but it’s a good start.”

I didn’t move. He couldn’t be serious. What was the idea? We’d play house for a while, and all would be better? We couldn’t fix this. We’d only make it worse and possibly burn down the town while we’re at it.

One look at him told me he was deadly serious, leaving me with no doubt that he wasn't leaving here without me.

I gritted my teeth. It didn't matter that there was enough blame to go around. If one of us was going to burn, it would be me.

But jokes on him. I would making no apologies.

/-/-/

Note: So I know this probably isn't what was expected. I tried to mess with Will's motivation a bit to make it less about what Emory did and more about what he was "owed" [Insert Eye Roll], but also keep it true to their reuniting.

There was originally a fourth part that was much lighter and more cute but still featured a jealous Will, set after the four weeks when they'd finally gotten together, but it was giving more even more difficulty. I figured I'd rather get this up and work on that when I'm up for it than keep holding off. Who knows if that part will ever get done.

As always, I appreciate all those who took the time to read, and am looking forward to any thoughts and opinions you feel like sharing. If you noticed any mistakes or typos, feel free to mention.

Thank you!

Edit:

Part 4

#devil's night series stuff #emory scott #will grayson iii #willemmy #my fic #au #requested #multiple chatpers #devil's night series

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lovelyfanatical · 1 year

Text

I Get a Suger Rush Whenever I'm With You - Chapter 5.1

Happy whatever day it is for you, fellow Drukkari stans! We've made it to the fifth chapter, which is already further than I thought I was going to get with this! If you missed the last installment and need to catch up, you can find it here, or you can start over from the beginning here. Last time, Thena went out with a bang and some interesting advice to Druig. What will he do with it? Find out now in the next mini-chapter of Drukkari in the Great British Bake Off, with an extra special guest star!

Druig had been trying to push his conversation with Thena out of his mind to no avail. While at work, he’d often found himself lost in thought as he went over his and Makkari’s interactions over the past few weeks. His co-worker at the shop had to take over most customer interactions, much to his annoyance. After the third time that week, it seemed he’d had enough. After zoning out on the job again, Druig was brought back to his senses when Hunter shoved a box of books into his arms.

“Jesus, Hunter!” was all he could get out as he tried not to topple over at the sudden weight.

“Oi! You need to snap out of whatever this is and start pulling your weight,” Hunter responded, already on the move. Druig trudged after him to the front of the store with the box.

“I’m fine,” Druig replied, not even convincing himself.

“That’s what my demonic hell beast ex-wife said right before we got divorced. Again,” he said, coming to a halt. There was no place to set down the box, so Druig simply held it as Hunter unpacked its contents. After a good minute of silence, Hunter added, “Really? No jab about the second divorce? You usually can’t resist that.”

“Too easy, and you were expecting it. Makes it less fun,” Druig mumbled.

“That’s never stopped you before,” Hunter remarked as he finished unpacking the box. He glanced out the front window of the tiny secondhand shop. With no customer in sight, he turned back to Druig and sighed. “Alright, what are you moping about this time? Did you get eliminated?”

“You know I can’t tell you.”

“Like you really care about breaking the rules.”

Hunter was staring him down now. While Druig never wanted to admit to moping, he also knew he could trust his co-worker. With a roll of the eyes, he relented.

“It’s not Bake Off. It’s more… Bake Off-adjacent.”

“What does that mean?”

“I sort of met someone on Bake Off.”

“And they haven’t been scared off by your stink face yet?”

“She has not.”

“Is that why you’ve been in a good mood the past month?” Druig raised an eyebrow at that. “Or at least less likely to put off customers with your brooding, anyway.”

“I guess so.”

“So, what’s the problem?”

“Nothing really. I just… I realized I don’t actually know how she feels about me. And asking her out is probably against the rules.”

It was Hunter’s turn to raise his eyebrows. “You’ve been around her for a month and you’re just now realizing this?”

“Things were going well enough. Guess I didn’t feel the need to find out before now.”

“Well, leave it to you to get stuck in some will-they-won’t-they after getting into baking on a dare,” Hunter said, not even trying to hide his smile.

“So you admit it’s your fault?” Druig deadpanned.

“I take no responsibility over your brooding,” he retorted. “You should probably figure out what’s going on with her, else you’re start scaring customers off again. And congrats on making it this far, by the way.”

“Did I say I was still in it?”

Hunter thought for a moment before muttering, “Bollocks,” to himself just as a customer walked in. Druig smirked as he took the empty box and retreated to the back. Hunter quickly plastered on his customer service smile as he turned around. Glancing back, Druig sniggered as he noticed his co-worker flipping him off behind his back.

Druig was usually quite good at keeping secrets. He’d always been quiet by default, and having been a loner for much of his life, he didn’t exactly have many people to share secrets with anyway. He’d already resolved to keep that last part of his and Thena’s conversation to himself, but despite his best efforts, it seems he couldn’t completely hide the fact that he was hiding something from Makkari. Even over text, she seemed to notice something was off. It only got worse when they met on the first morning of the fifth week.

He greeted her and the rest of their friends as usual, talking about their weeks and teasing Sersi for being late when she finally made her unintentional grand entrance. He thought he was in the clear – that is, until Makkari cornered him on the shuttle. He was seated in the back row between her and the window, with Phastos already sleeping soundly on the other side of her. They were just pulling away from the hotel when she poked him in the ribs and signed, Out with it.

Out with what? he asked, rubbing the spot where she’d poked. Luckily, he hadn’t made any noise at the surprise contact, but it had still hurt a bit.

Whatever it is you’re not saying, she replied. Something’s clearly bothering you, and I haven’t been able to figure out what it is.

Really, oh great detective? he tried to tease, but she only raised an eyebrow at him. He sighed as he said, It’s nothing.

It’s not nothing if it’s bugging you, she said, concern creeping into her steady gaze. He softened at the sight, though he was still resolved not to tell her anything. Instead, he signed, It’s nothing I won’t get over. You don’t need to worry.

She studied him, and Druig did his best to look reassuring. After a moment, she gave a slight nod before saying, Good. Can’t have you losing focused and getting eliminated.

Not a chance, he replied with a confident smirk. She smiled back, seemingly satisfied for now. That said, Druig had a feeling he hadn’t heard the end of it yet.

Don't know if any of you are also Agents of SHIELD fans, but welcome to Lance Hunter! Because the thought of Hunter and Druig working in a shop together makes me laugh for whatever reason 😂 Hope you enjoyed this mini-installment!

Part 15

#lovelyfanatical shares #drukkari gbbo au #drukkari #druig x makkari #eternals fanfiction #eternals #welcome to lance hunter #druig is stressed #he needs a friend

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thiswaycomessomethingwicked · 1 year

Note

For the piping hot asks: Grima + 👃, 👂, 😍, 💋, 🔥, 💞, and 💌, please!!

Thank you sooooo much for this!! Apologies in advance for the novel I wrote you. But this is Grima and you were so very generous in asking me many things! 💞💞💞

[Qs from the Piping Hot OC asks]

Does your OC smell good? Do they have a signature scent?

Does.

Grima Wormtongue.

Smell good?

Finally, a question I have been asked!

Everyone in Rohan has an Odour. No one smells good by our standards. Not Eomer. Not Eowyn. Not Theoden. Not Theodred. Not Grima. No one.

Just saying.

These people aren’t bathing every other day. The very wealthy are bathing maybe bi-weekly? Weekly at most and that’s a hell of a lot of work (for the servants, to be fair. Since these are posh nobles who don’t labour for themselves. Since really, the only commoner among them who has probably drawn his own water and heated his own tub at a regular basis at some point in his life is Grima). This is all presuming that Rohan has a pro-bathing culture and doesn’t believe hot water opens your pores into which illness descends and gives you plague.

Just context setting.

Anyway.

So ok look, I understand why Peter Jackson took the approach he did for Grima in the films—he needed to make him visually distinctive. He had a lot of characters who kind of looked the same (I remember the first time I watched FOTR and I couldn’t tell Boromir and Aragorn apart) and he needed to make sure the audience was able to swiftly look at a scene and go a) New Person! We haven’t seen this one yet! & b) He is Clearly Evil. We can tell by his appearance alone. He doesn’t need to speak, we can just tell that he is evil.

(There’s so much to unpack about why we associate those visual markers as evil, but that’s for another time.)

However, when we look at Grima as a character—where he is positioned in society, his role, his rank etc. etc.—then the greasy, probably-gross-to-be-near, implied-minimal-personal-hygiene persona doesn’t make sense.

I am perfectly willing to have Grima be visually ugly in his base appearance (his face should be weird and unappealing). I’m fine with that. In fact, that’s how I want it. But he is a man with no family standing, no land, no title, his entire fortune and position is dependent on the good graces of the king.

Within the court he’s a distinguished enough figure that he is the king’s chief advisor. [I talk about the roles he might have played elsewhere on my tumblr.] And he is close enough to Theoden that he sits at his right hand and holds enough power to speak plainly to titled men and distinguished guests without needing to bow too low to the ground.

This means he has standards of appearance and self-grooming that he would be held to and expected to fulfill. The social (and personal, political) cost of not meeting these expectations would be high and Grima is a climber and a survivor therefore I see him as being dedicated to meeting the standards others impose on him.

He also is clearly someone who values wealth, nice clothes, displays of power etc. and that includes bathing and primping and preening and all that good stuff. The fact that he has time and financial means to Look Fancy says a lot about his position within society—even if he doesn’t have a nice title or whack of land to go along with it.

All of this to say—by the standards of Rohan, yes. He smells good.

Does he have a signature scent? I don’t know if Rohan has a perfume culture that would enable the idea of a signature scent, but he’d probably have some form of soap and such that he’s partial to. Also does Rohan believe in miasma-theory of disease spread? Because if so, Grima totally wanders around with a clove studded orange.

Could I have answered that in two paragraphs? Yes. Did I choose violence instead? Yes.

2. Does your OC have an attractive voice?

As it’s not described in the books, so far as I can remember, I tend to flip flop on how I imagine his voice to sound. There are days when I head canon it as resting higher up in his throat/nose – so it comes out a little nasally.

Then there are days when I head canon it as deeper and he can speak quietly, when he wants to. The sort of weighted quiet that you have to really stop what you’re doing and pay attention in order to follow him. Which is a good way to ensure his audience is focused on him, and him alone. (I had a director at work who did that and I remember it being very effective during negotiations.)

Looking purely at canon, I lean towards the latter option since he is clearly positioned as the mini-version of Saruman, so to speak. He’s meant to have abilities that mirror the wizard’s but aren’t equal to him. Saruman’s Voice is infamous, therefore as a scaled down version, it stands to reason Grima’s voice would have been pleasant to listen to.

He's definitely a good public speaker, as we see in that battle of the wits with Gandalf (in the books, as the films cut 95% of it). Gandalf obviously wins, but Grima definitely holds his own. Also, he comes from an oral tradition society where rhetoric and public oration are highly prized, so he’d be well versed in it. Also song is a huge part of Rohirric culture so he’s likely able to hold a tune, at the very least, if not know how to properly sing.

So yeah, I would say I generally view him as having a pleasant voice to listen to. When I’m not leaning into the slightly whiny version, but that’s just me and not based in canon.

3. What does your OC find irresistible in others?

Smarts and confidence. 100%. Intelligence and willpower and a strong personality that conveys “I’m in charge, I know what I’m doing, and I am strong in my sense of self.” Grima is one of life’s followers, that boy don’t lead, and I think he finds highly confident and intelligent people very attractive. Power is also irresistible to him—so someone in a position of wealth and power who throws their weight around, is clever and wise, and conveys an air of “I’ll walk on you, but it’ll be sexy”—that person would be Grima’s catnip.

I personally write him as having a thing for people who could physically break him. Like Eomer could bench press that man. So could Eowyn, for that matter.

Grima: It’s so hot that you could kill me.

Eomer:

Eomer: right.

4. Is your OC a good kisser? How do they do it?

I think he’s tolerable. Not someone you’d write home about but he’s not terrible. He’s not like, trying to chew your face off.

As in life, in this he is more of a follower. So, he might start instigating something, but he’ll quickly want the other person to lead. I mean, look at the (attempted) seduction scene in the movies with Eowyn. I think he was hoping, “if I lead us to a certain point in this dance, she’ll take up the reigns from there.”

(To be fair, it is hard to say how much of that was him as a person and how much of that hinged on class and rank issues. She’s the daughter of kings, he’s a nobody. He can’t touch her without her consent without serious repercussions. I know he was controlling her uncle and some of the court, but there are certain social and class rules that he wouldn’t be able to squirm out of and I strongly believe “the commoner laid a hand on the noblewoman and she didn’t want it” is one of them. It’s that sticky thing of—he might be a man in a very, clearly patriarchal society—but it is also a classist and rank-focused society wherein she’s the niece of the king, sister to the third marshal, cousin of the second marshal, and descended from the house of Eorl on both sides of the family. She outranks him to an insane degree. And again, his power and position is by the grace of Theoden alone. Her power and position is by dint of birth.)

In terms of approach, I think he goes from gentle to rough pretty quickly—depending who the other party is depends on if he wants to be hurt or do the hurting.

5. What’s a surefire way to make your OC get flustered?

Lord, I have no idea. I think it would depend on the person and the situation. He’s quick witted, we know, so I suspect he just defaults to sarcasm whenever presented with something unexpected, even if it’s sentimental or heart-felt from the other person.

I always think it’s interesting how taken aback he is in the Eowyn-Theodred-Death-Bed-scene when he’s doing his “oh you are alone” shtick then she says the famous “your words are poison” and storms out. I can’t tell if he actually thought she might be swayed and is surprised that she’s not or if the words hit home (I don’t think this is the case, for some reason). I’m not sure what to make of that scene in terms of his expectations and reaction to the outcome. Regardless, he’s clearly flustered/surprised.

For more sentimental things, I think if he was keen on a person and they complimented something he took real pride in, he would find it surprising and might be taken aback. Then he’d go through his paranoid-politician brain of: what do they want? What are they trying to get from me? what’s the secret motive? Etc.

He might, eventually, come around to realizing there isn’t a secret motive and someone was truly just being nice to him. This is a rare event and should be documented with the same intensity as once in a lifetime meteor showers.

6. Do they treat sex casually or do they view it as something with a lot of emotional weight?

This is another hard one. I suspect that he’s very all or nothing. So, if he’s decided this is a casual fling, he will be ruthlessly cold and distant. He and that person will fuck then they will put their clothes back on, not talk to each other, and go on their way for the remainder of the day. It would be short, too, and likely transactional in nature—either explicitly or implicitly (e.g., he and Person A shag—Grima gets jollies and maybe something else from it and Person A, in turn, get their ale licence renewed).

However, if he does the daft thing and develop emotions for a person it’s very intense. “I’ll set the world on fire and kill everyone for you” sort of thing. Even if that person never asks it of him. Which can, uh, cause problems. In these situations yes, sex carries emotional weight though I suspect it would be less than other aspects of the relationship. I think he would take any sort of oath or troth very seriously and would expect the other person to do as well. Which is a funny thing, coming from the King of Oath Breakers over here. Sex would be meaningful, and would be used as a way of confirming that oath or troth or understanding between the two of them. I suspect it also might be important in a reaffirming way since I don’t think Grima would be very secure in any sort of relationship—barring marriage, perhaps, since there are legal aspects to hold people in place—since I run on the belief that he assumes everyone is going to leave him at some point.

7. How would they plan a romantic evening for a significant other?

Meticulously. And, to a certain degree, earnestly.

Yeah, I really think there’d be a weird, earnest, sweetness to it. Weird being a word that carries a lot of weight in that sentence. I suspect there would be a few disquieting aspects as well, since I don’t believe Grima does anything quite the way the average person goes about activities, but he’d put a lot of effort into it.

This would also be the point when that person would realize that Grima has memorized all they’ve ever said about themselves and has, possibly, been spying on/stalking them and so knows everything about their likes, dislikes etc. Which, Grima, honey, no. Don’t do that.

I haven’t thought through Rohan’s courting and marriage culture so I don’t have much to say on that front—nor have I thought through Rohan’s view of non-marital relationships. As I have their spiritual life being not a religion, and more just a mental landscape of the natural world and it happens to be animistic, marriage as an institution has no faith-based implications to it. Having a mistress isn’t offending god, so to speak. Therefore, like in so many places, it’s an economic and social custom meant to cement bonds and alliances between families (and countries, for the Eomer and Eowyns of the world).

That said, Tolkien was a Romantic in many respects and his view of the world had a lot more “they married for love! They also happened to both be nobles and their marriage happened to also be a great alliance” than is reasonable.

I’m not sure where I’m going with this—I suppose, a musing on the role of romantic love in Rohan would be separate from courtship/marriage and therefore how you romance a potential mistress might be different to how you romance a potential wife.

Not to mention if it’s same-sex wooing, since I don’t believe Rohan is at all chill with anything approaching homosexuality. They seem pretty firmly patriarchal, binary in their gender roles, and idealize militaristic masculinity. Therefore, Grima trying to plan something for a man would be different than for a woman.

Regardless the complicated social layers, that man would be meticulous and if it were for love reasons he’d be sweet and earnest, if in a disconcerting and possibly creepy fashion.

-------

Thank you again! This was a blast to write, and I enjoyed it so much. ❤️❤️❤️

#grima wormtongue #ask meme #reply #lord of the rings #lotr #lotr ask meme #anon #ask #eomer #eowyn #does. grima wormtongue. smell good #something I thought about while I made dinner before answering this ask #as an FYI anon #my dinner thoughts: does he smell good? what is rohan's approach to miasma theory of disease spread? what is their bathing situation like?#what's their infrastructure? limited I imagine. So bitches be hauling water and firewood to make sure them nobles are clean #grima thoughts

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marengogo · 1 year

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Rambling in INFJese - Part 7: ARMY across; JM down

Perreo Pesau’ - by Rauw Alejandro [Afrodisíaco]

[Music is a very big part of my life and I’m MOSTLY INCAPABLE of writing without music, so I just thought I'd share what I am listening to while writing this]

🐺 — 🐺 — 🐺—

For the longest time now I’ve debated on whether to make this a “Naked - Series” post or an “INFJese - Series”. When I write posts for the Naked Series I am able to dive deep and completely immerse, because I am able to reason through events given on the multitude of provided facts. Hence I can confidently express my opinions, while obviously trading carefully.

In this case however, I ended up going for INFJese because there is so much to unpack and ironically enough, even though they are clearly visible and meant to be so, they are also the one thing about JK we haven’t heard him discuss or ever directly allude to (except for the number “7” of course), which is an indication to just how personal they are to him. Yet, we can still make a couple of educated guesses and respectful speculation about them; about JK’s Tattooes and a bit of JM’s as well.

This post was brought about by this ask → HERE. Originally, I was just going to reply to it directly, sticking to the POLYC question. However, as I kept researching, questioning and reasoning, I had too many questions formulating and all the answers that I found kept slowly taking me back, one tattoo at a time, to the very beginning. So here we are, rambling about tattoos with a naked-series undertone, I can already tell…😬

So 🎵Let’s start at the very beginning, a very good place to start 🎶the date is August 11, 2019. BTS performs at the LOTTE DUTY FREE FAMILY CONCERT, which will turn out to be their last performance before they embark, for the very first time, a period of break as announced by BH in the following statement:

From this point on, our boys will take a “break” and enjoy their free time. For the most part each member spent time doing things they wanted and didn’t really meet with each other, except on one occasion: JK’s birthday. Jimin and J-Hope would visit our golden maknae for his birthday. JM would bring him presents, a cake, take a picture and post it on twitter on September 1, 2019. Now if you are a JKKer you will have already seen that picture, what however you may not have noticed is that, it appears that JK already had the smiley face tattoo on his finger, as pointed out by this person (don’t worry, I’ll reveal the blackout picture in a sec…)

Here is the original tweet so you can see for yourself, and make your own conclusion on whether or not it appears that he already has the smiley face, or a temporary version of it:

At this point in time JK is happily enjoying his break, exercising to his heart content, potentially has his first tattoo, perhaps as a birthday present to himself. He’s also celebrated his birthday with friends, while being surprised by one particular member JM. Considering the important JK places on birthdays, and special days, I’d say that all was more than peachy in KooKooLand.

However, as life often does, when you reach any happiness-related peak, due to happiness’ ephemeral nature, a descent/fall is bound to happen soon after. September 8, 2019 rolls around. A certain picture starts circulating and trending:

The picture’s source, as always, is uncertain and debated:

Some say it came from JK’s brother's IG account (but by that time he’d already closed his previous account…)

Some say it came from a 2018 picture found on pintrest (which, common now 😑 …)

Some say it came from an OP who mate JK (this is the version I tend to believe, I meddled through a lot of tweets stating this, as I think that picture is indeed JK’s hand, not so much for the ARMY tattoo, but for the 0613 one under his thumb)

Anyways, as always, the bird app began to chirp:

At this point, in this picture that is circulating, his hand only has:

0613

ARMY

🥴

Crown

Though we can’t see the full hand from that picture, so the 💜 might have already been there, his hand will eventually have:

(💜)

ARMY logo (this is also a bit debatable, because of the sleeve in the Churro-Pic we can’t tell if it was there, but the first time it was officially seen was October 9, 2019 on their way to their concert in Saudi Arabia)

+ + +

Now, it is perfectly normal to go back and finish a tattoo, but this usually is, I do the frame and then take my time and do the coloring, which is what the “The hand tattoo is a representative of the members”-brigade says. However, JK’s hand tattoo has no color filling or complicated design, I believe that if writing the members name had been his intent he would have done it all in one go, as it is NOT a complicated tatt to get, and getting in parts would have made NO SENSE.

Anyways, this bird app is chirping and nobody seems to know where the picture came from but eventually the consensus is that it is fake because; “why the hell would JK go around with ARMY tattooed on his hand?!” like so:

And to this point all that JK might be seeing is himself trending for a tattoo he actually has and eventually we would see, not a very bothersome scenario, but most likely one he could live with, but then came September 16, 2019 well into September 17, 2019. They came in like wrecking balls.

September 16, 2019 JK (and the members) is at Incheon airport getting ready to go to Australia to film Bon Voyage 4, and 🎶Oop! There is! 🎵 his first time publicly showing his tattoos.

Cool right? But then, and I don't know exactly the time frame because it all seems to have happened at the same time please remember I’m a 2020 ARMY, JK is shown back hugging and drinking with the now infamous tattoo artist Mijoo on a leaked CCTV camera footage and all hell broke loose. All sorts of speculations are made but the most popular one is that Mijoo is JK’s girlfriend and following are the actions that were instantly taken (by instant I mean 16 were the rumours. 17 the BH statement was made):

Mijoo denied being in a relationship with JK (here → https://www.allkpop.com/article/2019/09/tattoo-artist-denies-shes-dating-btss-jungkook)

BH denied Mijoo being in a relationship with JK (here → https://www.soompi.com/article/1352928wpp/big-hit-entertainment-denies-bts-member-jungkooks-dating-rumors)

I cannot imagine what was going through JK’s mind, given that the way it appeared at the time he took off with people shook at his tattoos and landed with people outraged at him allegedly dating someone and don’t even get me started on him apologising to ARMY on the last episode of Bon Voyage 4 … let’s not get into that right now.

I cannot imagine, but one thing that is for sure is that, going by the Churro-Pic which I think to be real, somewhere between the 8th and 16th of September he potentially added the ARMY logo (unless it was already there), the + + + and the J; the J.

The most infamous J. Because there are so many opinions about it, I think it is only fair that I should share on this post what I think about it as I really do believe it to be an afterthought. Meaning, JK went to get ARMY related tattoos on his hand (even the ARMY logo) just to display his love for ARMY (the crown and the 🥴tho … who knows, right?).

Admittedly, I’m not sure what the “+ + +” are meant to represent but a “J” is a J and this is where it gets tricky as a Jikooker. We have ZERO INFORMATION relating to what happened between September 8 and September 16. This was after jikook was together for JK’s birthday and before the whole “JK scandal”. I have ZERO INFORMATION but I do believe MY PERSONAL OPINION that something happened to make him go and add the J (and all the other hand tattoos). Following are my 3 POSSIBLE theories:

He had it all planned from the very beginning, even before getting the ARMY tattoo, but was still hesitant on whether to have such a statement on his hand, but then decided to go ahead with it so went back to get that J. (I feel this to be highly unlikely, but who knows right?).

He wanted to add a J meaning Jungkook and when the tattoo artist asked “where would you like it?” He looked at his hand and realised, to his amusement and probably joy, that adding it above the M, would actually make “JM” and went with it (this is very likely, but who knows right?) because he obviously was okay for it to be perceived as so. Otherwise, I’m pretty sure he would have found another location for that J it’s not that hard.

A mix of 1 & 2. After the ARMY tattoo, he might have eventually decided that he did want a Jimin tattoo and realised how perfectly that M was placed; almost like fate …😬 let’s not forget the seriousness with which he makes sure not to have any ring between J and M (this is the theory I personally believe, but who knows right?).

Now we don’t know the reason/s and meaning of his hand tattoos, but through the good and bad times that JK experienced during his well deserved break from August 11 to September 16, 2019, when looking at his hand, and when I say looking, I mean at first glance, I mean right in your face, I mean you don’t even have to second guess even among all the other symbols; the letters read: ARMY across. JM down. FIGHT ME.

I could go on talking about the progression of all his Tattoos up to June 18, 2022 (which is when POLYC posted the finished Tattoo reveal), but that would make this post 1300 pages long, so I’ll some space here —> [ ] just in case I do another post about the progression, or please let me know if you’d like me to do it. For now, let fast forward 3 years into 2022, so that I can finally answer the ASK 🥴.

Now, I cannot tell you what the eye might have meant and what the time on the clock means, whereas it is a bit easier to speculate on word-tattoo, speculating on drawing-tattoo is like playing the lottery: it could literally mean ANYTHING depending on the person who got them. It would be a bit easier if JK had said even one thing about his art but it is safe to say that they are things that somehow relate to his life and things he believes in or had believed and not anymore? If I had to make an educated guess however:

EYE: Just by googling you will find this definition about the possible meaning of an eye tattoos - Depending on your chosen design, a tattoo of an eye can mean many things. There are several popular ocular pieces, including the Eye of Horus and the Third Eye. That said, in general, the eye is commonly associated with protection, guidance, knowledge, and clarity. - (from the FAQs of this site → https://www.thetrendspotter.net/eye-tattoos/).

So he has now changed the eye into Bullet Proof. We all know the meaning of that for JK and all members in particular. In general, something bulletproof, is invincible, free from harm, so in a way a sort of protection as well. But once again … who knows right?.

CLOCK: Just by googling you will find this definition about the possible meaning of an clock tattoos - x Generally speaking, a clock tattoo might symbolize a range of meanings from simply time to life and death, mortality, existence, infinity, endless love, stability, and structure, or referencing a specific special moment in one's life. (from this site → https://customtattoodesign.ca/tattoo-meanings/clock-tattoo-meanings#:~:text=Generally%20speaking%2C%20a%20clock%20tattoo,special%20moment%20in%20one's%20life. )

My brother made me draw the design for his clock tattoo which he wanted to have on his shoulder. He wanted the 12, 3, 6, and 9 to be substituted with our names initials (myself, him, mom and dad) as we just so happen to have the same initial letter the devil works hard, but my parents worked harder 🙃🙃, and then he wanted the hands of time to indicated the time he was born. So I am very inclined to think that perhaps it was a special moment in his life, even his time of birth but, unless he tells us, we would never know.

One thing I will say is that, he seems to have added a hand of time in the new version of the time, so he seems to have changed the time. In the original version it seems to be 3 o’clock, but in the new version it seems to be indeed 3:24. It could be intentional, it could be random, thought would feel weird for it to be random, in my opinion, but once again … who knows right?.

Aaaand last but not least here is my theory with regards to Polyc_sj arm-signature-tattoo.

As we all know all members have gotten their Friendship-7 tattoo from him as shown by the signatures of the members in his studio, and even though I don’t know why Tae didn’t sign, Polyc confirmed on a live he did on the October 23, 2022 that he did indeed give Tae his tattoo, but we do not know the location they also asked about the location of Suga’s and he said it was a secret 🥴🥴🥴. I would have linked an english translation but all I could find were ones of bitter Capulets so yeah … no.

But here is a link to the tweet I put in the image, google translate is “okay” in this instance: https://twitter.com/hangbokmanhaeu/status/1584054029713539073

So when it comes to signatures, if it were just about having their signatures except for Tae from what we’ve seen he has them all. So my opinion is that those are the dates when both JK and JM came to do an actual piece, so: JK February 25 (2.25) & JM April 22 (4.22). February 28, 2022 will be the last time we would see Jk wearing something akin to a short sleeve, before June 18, 2022, which is why I believe that February 25 is the day JK went in to start working on his sleeve (and of course we don’t really know when the videos were taken but it after this, I couldn’t find any other T-Shirt JK pics before June).

Actually the only other one was when JayPark posted with JK, on April 19, 2022 but that was with his old tattoos, which also bring forth another point. Tattoos are made to be seen. They are personal, they are significant but also you have them on your skin because in most cases is like wearing your heart on your sleeves. So I do believe that JK kept them hidden until they were ready to tell us whatever it is he wanted the world to know, which in this case was June 18, 2022.

And JM? Well well well. Differently from JK we haven’t seen the rest of the crescent moons yet, even though he did tell us he would show us at some point, but my believe is that Polyc might have been the one to finish the rest of the moons, which is a weird thought because he has a very different style and I am not sure how that makes sense but what I have to go on is the following:

March 13, 2022 - Permission To Dance on Stage in SEOUL, we see JM’ new tattoos.

June 2, 2022 - Incheon Airport (returning from the USA), we spot that JM seems to have even more tattoos under the crescent moon.

Now, we know BTS left for the USA March 28, 2022 for PTD in LV IN April where he was still pretty clothed when it came to his back. They then came back April 19, 2022 and stayed in SK until May 29, 2022 when they left to go see president Biden. The signature says 4.25, which is why I believe he might have had Polyc finish the moons on April 25, 2022, after Las Vegas, before DC. However until we see the whole tattoo it is just what it is: my speculation.

Obviously I don’t know the relationship Polyc have with JK and JM, but him having made an actual piece on them and wanting to have a signature from two members of BTS that also seem to have a great appreciation for tattoos, seems to be plausible. In the same way that JK has POLYC tattooed on himself, probably thinking of him as the person who, as he said, saved his arm.

But maybe there is more to the story, and if so, how are we supposed to know if the people involved don’t tell us? What I actually do think you should be asking yourself is, if Polyc really did finish JM’s crescent moon tattoos, does JM also have a POLYC signature on his back? … who knows right?.

Always respectfully yours 💜,

Marengo.

#Rambling in INFJese #Jikook #Jikook Tattoos #Jikook & PolyC #Jungkook's Hand Tattoo

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