#seokjin x fem!reader
Text
Liked ★
Yandere!Seokjin x fem!reader
Summary: You liked him, liked as in past tense. Liked as in you didn’t like him anymore. He didn’t believe it for a second, and he’ll do anything to make you like him again.
Warnings: Cursing, stalking, Jin is kinda narcissistic?, he’s also mean and delusional, possessiveness, jealousy, voyeurism, smut, drugging, implied kidnapping
Wc: 5.9k
A/n: based on this req! Love the idea, hope you like it!
Disclaimer: This is 100% fiction. I am in no way saying that this is how any member of bts would act. Nor do I condone the actions detailed in the story. This is purely for entertainment purposes only. If any of the warnings trigger you, or you’re under 18 ¡do not read! I’m not your mother, and I don’t take any accountability for what you decide to read online!
He met you through Jimin. You were one of Jimin’s best friends, it seemed like he had known you for a long time.
So who were he to ruin Jimin’s image of you, and tell him that you were just so annoying. You were pretty yes, but it was something about your laugh. Something about the way you talked. It just rubbed Jin the wrong way. There are some people you just don’t click with, he thought to himself. As he looked at you from across the table. Some people are just not meant to be friends, and that’s ok. The only problem is that Jimin brought you with him no matter what. It was always “can y/n come?”. He asked Jimin once why he brought you around all the time.
“She just broke up with her boyfriend. Cut her some slack man.”
He had answered. But it had been eight months. Which, in his opinion, was more than enough time to heal from a breakup. But you still showed up. Every. Single. Time.
“What are you going to order, Jin?”
You asked him, looking back at him from across the table. You were slightly blushing for some reason. Everyone’s eyes turned to him, waiting for his response. In all honesty, he had been too busy thinking about you, to even read the menu.
“I don’t know yet.”
He answered in a stern voice.
“I really like the lobster here, it’s really good.”
Jin almost rolled his eyes at your comment.
“Really? Well I guess I’ll order that!”
He said with an overly excited tone. Not being able to control the sarcasm in his voice. Thankfully the waiter came before you could answer him. Everyone started saying their order, before it was his turn.
“I’ll have the salmon.”
He said and looked briefly over at you. To see if you’d have a reaction. You looked puzzled down at the menu for a second.
“I’ll have the salmon as well.”
“Wait! Jin, wait for me!”
You yelled after him, trying to run in your high heels. He had finally been able to leave. And thankfully he was able to mostly converse with Namjoon during the dinner. He had almost made it into the taxi, but you caught him. He couldn’t just shut the door in your face. He’s not directly mean to you, at least he tries not to be directly mean to you. But god, you were so annoying! Why couldn’t you just take a hint and leave him alone?
“What?”
You were a little out of breath, and needed a moment to catch your breath before talking.
“I was just- I live on the way to your place. Maybe we could, you know, share a taxi?”
He mentally cursed himself for not shutting the door in your face. Cause now he had to actually be alone with you for at least 10 minutes.
“Oh come on, I’ll pay for myself don’t worry.”
You said when you saw him hesitating.
“Fine.”
He simply answered and jumped in the backseat. Not caring to find an excuse.
“So, did you have fun tonight?”
You asked him once the taxi started moving. He sighed. Now he had to small talk with you as well.
“Yeah it was alright.”
He shrugged. He could see in his peripheral view that you were looking at him.
“The salmon was so good! You were so right about that one.”
You tried again, once he didn’t take the conversation further.
“I didn’t say anything to you about it. You just copied me.”
You laughed, thinking that he was just joking.
“You’re so funny!”
You said in between laughs, and even went as far as leaning over him in a fit of laughter. He sat completely still. Not engaging with you what so ever. Once you realised, you sat back up.
“We should go out for dinner more together. I think it would-“
“Please y/n! Just shut the fuck up!”
He suddenly bursted out. He didn’t mean to. It just came out.
“You don’t have to talk all the time. You’re so annoying!”
He looked at you, your smile was no where to be seen. And for some reason he missed it already.
“I’m sorry.”
He quickly mumbled, hoping that your lips would turn at least a little bit upwards. But they didn’t. You looked away from him, turning your face completely towards the window. Your entire body was trying the get the furtherest away from him as possible, and it hurt him for some reason. He sighed. Your place was coming up, he would probably feel better once you left the car. Out of sight, out of mind.
“I talk so much because I like you, Jin.”
You said, barley above a whisper. He looked back at you. The taxi stopped, signalising for you to get out.
“I really liked you.”
You gave him a last devastating look before opening the door and stepping out. You shut the door in his face before he could answer. It didn’t matter, he was left speechless. And he did in fact not feel any better now that you left the car. He felt even worse.
“Liked” you said you “liked him”. As in past tense. As in you didn’t like him anymore. He was laying in bed, staring up at the ceiling. He couldn’t sleep, and when he can’t sleep he starts thinking. It had been a week since the incident in the taxi. The incident where you said you “liked” him. Whatever that meant.
He would give you an apology next weekend. Pull you aside before you sit down at the table. Explain that he was just tired, that he didn’t mean it. In the moment he meant it, but he didn’t mean to say it out loud. He was amazed by the fact that he actually felt sorry for you. He didn’t like you, so why was he so obsessed with getting you to like him? Maybe he liked you more than he thought? Nah. He told himself before rolling over and closing his eyes. Trying to think of something or anything else.
Friday came around eventually, and he was ready to meet the boys (and you) at a restaurant. He walked in, a little earlier than usual. He had to pull you aside before you sat down, just so it didn’t get awkward.
“You’re early today, what’s up bro?”
Jimin lit up once he saw Jin approaching the table. He sat down beside Jimin, briefly looking at the empty seat next to him.
“Where’s y/n?”
He asked once he realised it was only the two of them. You always arrived with Jimin. He always picked you up, even if it was a longer route. Jin felt weird just thinking about it. What if Jimin had feelings for you? Why would he go to such lengths if he didn’t? The feeling in his chest couldn’t be described as anything but jealousy.
“She’s not feeling well.”
He simply commented.
“Why?”
He asked with a smug face, slightly poking him in the side with his elbow. Jin rolled his eyes, leaning away from him.
“She’s always with you, it’s not weird that I’m asking.”
He scolded his younger friend. Jimin stopped, but giggled slightly at his defensiveness.
“Whatever you say man.”
Jimin said, before changing the topic. Jin wondered if you truly was sick, or if you just didn’t want to face him. You didn’t strike him as a cowardly person. You would probably show up if you could. So the only explanation to why you wouldn’t show up to hear his apology, must be that you were sick of course.
But two weeks after that, you didn’t show. Two months passed and still no sign of you. Jin wanted to ask Jimin, but he didn’t want Jimin to think he actually cared. But he did care. He wanted to apologise for being a dick, that’s all. His conscience needed to be cleared for him to move on. At least that’s what he told himself. The first weekend after the two month mark, (not that he kept track of the time or anything), the boys went to watch a football game. It was weird that you didn’t show, considering that you loved football. You wouldn’t miss out. So Jin decided to ask again.
“Is y/n still sick? Did she fucking break her leg or something?”
He asked Jimin once they had found their places.
“I don’t know man. I asked her if she wanted to come, she said she was going with someone else.”
He said and shrugged. Someone else? Why was he hurt that you would rather go with someone else?
“Ok, I’ll go get a beer. Anyone want one?”
Namjoon was the only one who raised a hand, small excuses of work in the morning was heard from the others. He squeezed out of the row of seats. He needed to clear his head, he had to stop this obsession he had with you. After the game he would call you, and if you didn’t pick up he would go to your house. Enough was enough, he had to see you.
“Jin?”
Your voice made him turn around. There you were, two beers in hand and the familiar blue shirt of your favourite team. Your hair was in a ponytail, so he could clearly see your entire face. And you were smiling. Smiling at him like what happened two months and a week ago was ancient history.
“Y/n? What are you doing here?”
He mentally face palmed himself for asking something so obvious. You looked down at your shirt and back up at him.
“The same reason you are, I suppose.”
He laughed awkwardly, before you both went quiet.
“Look, y/n. I just wanted to ap-“
“Hey, babe. I’ll hold these for you.”
A man’s voice interrupted him. He looked at the man who approached you take your beers. You looked at him as well before looking back to Jin.
“I’m sorry, this is my boyfriend Hoseok.”
Jin was left speechless at your choose of words to describe the man. You had a boyfriend now?! The feeling of jealousy started to spread through his chest again.
“This is Jin, Jimin’s friend.”
You told this Hoseok, when he didn’t answer. Jimin’s friend? That was it? He was offended by the fact that you didn’t view him as more. You had a crush on him for gods sake!
“I’d shake your hand man, but you know.”
He raised the beers in his hand awkwardly. Jin still kept quiet. Not wanting to utter a simple word to the man you dared calling your boyfriend.
“I’ll catch up with you, just go back to the seats, ok?”
You told your boyfriend, and he happily complied walking away from the uncomfortable situation.
“Why are you acting so strange?”
He shook his head.
“I don’t know. I just- I thought you had a crush on me. But now you have a boyfriend, so.”
You smiled at him.
“I liked you, yeah. But after you rejected me in that taxi, I moved on. It’s not that deep, some people just don’t click.”
His stomach turned into knots, he hated the way you sounded like him. He hated the way you spoke about him. That it wasn’t that deep? Well, it was really deep to him. Extremely deep actually.
“I’m sorry, y/n. I really am. I should’ve never said those things to you.”
He managed to apologise, regardless of the burning anger he felt inside. How dared you reject him? He rejected you first.
“Jin, it’s ok. Seriously. It’s all in the past.”
You patted his shoulder before taking a step away from him.
“Tell the boys I said hi.”
You said before walking away. This was not how this was going to end. He had spent two months and a week thinking about exactly how you would respond, and what would happen after. You were not supposed to be so nonchalant and run away to your new boyfriend. You were supposed to accept his apology and run into his arms. Maybe even give him a kiss and a blowjob for his effort to be so empathetic. He was going to make things right.
He couldn’t sleep again. How could he after you basically dumped him? So he started thinking. Why would you do such a thing? Why would you hurt him? He knows that he hurt you, but he apologised. So you should stop whatever prank you got going on and come back to the group. Come back to him. He really didn’t know why he felt this need for you. Before all this he literally couldn’t stand you. But now it’s like he yearned for you. And it was baffling to him that you didn’t feel the same.
Maybe you were just using that Hoseok guy to make him jealous. Yeah, that’s it. This was your payback. He laughed at the thought and sat up in his bed. Turning on the lamp on his nightstand. Might as well pay you a visit.
He payed the taxi driver before closing the door carefully. It was the middle of the night, not a soul to see in your neighbourhood. He looked up at your apartment building, he knew you lived on the seconds floor. The light in your living room was on. He quickly looked down at his phone. 02:38 am. You should’ve been asleep already.
He walked over to the other side of the road to get a better view of your living room. Trying to get a glimpse of you in your natural habitat. And to his surprise you were there. Completely naked. He felt a familiar feeling in his groin once he saw what was going on behind those walls. You were on the sofa on top of your new boyfriends dick. Your back was turned towards the window, giving Jin a perfect view of your ass bouncing up and down. Jin ripped his eyes away from you to check if anyone else was seeing this. But no lights were on, and no bystanders. What a freak you were, having sex right in front of a window where anyone could see.
Or maybe you were doing it for him? The curtains were slightly open, just enough open for him to see you. Maybe you didn’t shut them completely, for him? Maybe you hoped he would show up after the two of you met the same day? It was working for him. Mesmerised by the way your body moved in pleasure, he slid his hand into his pyjama bottoms. He couldn’t help himself. You looked so good, and you were so perfectly placed that he could see the dick going in and out of you. His only wish was hearing you. He wanted to hear you moan so bad. Suddenly you slowed down. Jin’s hand moved faster, trying to reach release before the show was over. Just one last bounce before you sank down beside him. Now facing the window. He continued, now seeing your heaving naked chest sprawled out on the sofa. He was close, very close. And once he saw you get up and walk towards the window completely naked, body glistening, tits slightly bouncing, he couldn’t help but feel a euphoric release.
Reality hit him immediately after. In the time it took for him to ride out his orgasm, you had made it to the window. Now staring directly at him. He quickly pulled his hand out of his trousers, turning around to face the wall immediately. The sticky wet spot that made the fabric of his pyjamas stick to his skin, was a shameful reminder. He didn’t know if you had seen him. He didn’t know if you were calling the police, or still looking at him. But he stood completely still, awaiting his destiny. After a few minutes he pulled his phone up from his pocket, calling for a taxi back to his place.
It wasn’t until he heard the taxi pull up he dared turning around. His eyes flickered up to the window. No sight of you, no sight of nothing. The curtains were shut completely this time.
It was Saturday, Jimin had invited the boys to his house for a few drinks and some food. Jin hadn’t gotten drunk in some time and quite frankly needed it to forget whatever madness happened the weekend before. So he gladly accept once Jimin proposed the idea in the group chat. Something he would regret.
“Can you get the door? I can’t let this burn man.”
Jimin asked and pointed to whatever he was making on the stove. Jin, being the first to show up that night was more than happy to welcome one of his mates, and walked over to the door.
“Jin! It’s so nice to see you again.”
You said and gave him a small hug as you stepped into Jimin’s apartment. He was left speechless. By you, but also by the man that followed you inside. You brought your boyfriend?
“Hey man!”
Hoseok said and stretched out his hand for him to shake. Jin just stood there looking at his hand. He couldn’t move. Too terrified that this was your way of revenge. You were going to expose him as the creep that jerked off outside your house to all his friends. And on top of that you brought your boyfriend to rub it even more in his face.
“You know what, I’m a hugger anyways.”
Hoseok laughed and pulled him in to a tight hug once he didn’t shake his hand. Once he pulled away from the hug, Jin smiled at him. He couldn’t risk getting on the bad side of Hoseok either. Maybe you told him?
“Sorry, Hoseok right?”
He asked and took his hand in his. Your boyfriend chuckled and nodded. What a ray of fucking sunshine of a boyfriend you got. Not completely different to himself, he thought.
“Oh please, just call me Hobi!”
He smiled before walking past Jin and following you inside. Jin continued to stand by the door for a second as he heard both you and your boyfriend greet Jimin in the kitchen. He had to talk to you. He had to pull you aside before you got the chance to reveal his big dirty secret. The boys would think he was disgusting, a creep, a weirdo. What the hell was he doing here? He had to run away. Run far far away and never come back.
“Are you ok?”
He got ripped out of his thoughts and realised the tall figure standing in front of him.
“Ah, Namjoon. You scared me.”
He tried to play off. As if he wasn’t standing in front of the open entrance door just staring out into the hallway.
“I’m ok yeah, but what about you? What have you been up to?”
He said and threw his arm around Namjoon’s shoulders, leading him into the apartment.
“Woah, ok. It’s only been a week since we last saw each other.”
An hour had passed. You still hadn’t said anything. Not even mentioned that night. He had taken a few shots out of agony and suspense. He couldn’t get drunk. No, not while you were a ticking bomb ready to ruin his image forever. He had to stay sober so he could defend himself whenever the situation arose. Or if he was lucky enough to get you alone so he could convince you, hell maybe even beg for you not to say anything. He would do anything for you. For you not to say anything, of course.
“I have to go to the bathroom.”
You announced, slightly intoxicated. You were so cute, your face a little red and your words a little slow.
“I have to go to the bathroom too!”
Jin quickly said, getting up quickly. The room got quiet. He realised he had said that a little loud and with a little too much excitement.
“Ok.”
You shrugged, walking away from the table. Everyone started talking again, meaning he was in the clear. He stumbled after you.
“After you, princess.”
You said as you proudly held the bathroom door open for him. He would’ve smiled at your joke if this wasn’t a serious situation.
“I’m sorry, but I have to go first.”
You mumbled and started unbuttoning your trousers. He nodded. He didn’t even have to pee.
“Y/n, I’m so sorry. I didn’t-“
“I’m not drunk enough to pee while you’re watching me.”
He panicked at your words and didn’t know what to do with himself.
“Oh- uh. Do you want me to leave?”
You laughed.
“No silly. Just turn around.”
He did as instructed.
“I’m sorry, ok? I should’ve never done that! Please, just don’t tell the others y/n. I won’t recover from it.”
He started pleading, still facing the door. You went quiet for a few seconds. He gulped, anxious of what you would answer.
“What the hell are you talking about?”
You said and flushed the toilet. He turned around knowing you were finished. You were struggling with the button of your jeans, but looking at him with a confused look.
“Are you playing with me? Please if you are, don’t, I can’t handle that right now.”
You started washing your hands.
“No, Jin. I have no idea what you’re talking about. Is this about that time in the taxi again? Cause I told you it’s ok.”
“No. I mean- uh. Yes?”
He didn’t know what to say. Did you really mean it? Had you not seen him that night? A wave of relief washed over him. If you were telling the truth he was the luckiest man alive.
“What?”
“It’s about last weekend.”
He tested, seeing if you would remember.
“And?”
You asked puzzled. He let out a breath of relief. You were completely clueless.
“I didn’t mean to be so awkward with your- ehhh, Hobi.”
He managed to get out, not wanting to call him your boyfriend out loud. Now that he wasn’t caught and labelled a total pervert, he still had a chance to win you back.
“My Hobi, huh? You’re cute Jin.”
You said as you unlocked the door.
“You’re forgiven by the way.”
You closed the door behind you, and he quickly locked it. He had never felt more relieved in his entire life. Maybe you weren’t looking at him, maybe you were just looking around to see if anyone saw? And maybe he was fortunate enough to be well enough hidden that night to not get caught. Well, he knew he would be more careful the next time. He shook his head, baffled by his own words. The next time? He thought as he flushed the toilet. He didn’t understand what he felt towards you, but he wanted there to be a next time. He wanted the next time to be him underneath you, not your stupid boyfriend. He unlocked the door and started walking down the hallway. He didn’t want to admit it to himself before, but maybe he actually liked you. Like, liked liked you. He sat back down at the table. Taking another shot now that he could actually get drunk.
“Ooo, where are you going?”
Jimin asked you. Jin hadn’t heard the first part of the conversation, but pretended he had been here the entire time.
“This very fancy spa hotel. He said it was an early birthday present.”
You said and looked lovingly at your boyfriend.
“Wow, you’re lucky! You must really love her, Hobi!”
“You’re leaving?”
Jin asked you, ignoring Jimin’s hilarious comment, and quite honestly he didn’t want to hear Hobi’s answer to that. You nodded.
“Yeah, next Friday.”
He took another shot, drowning the jealousy that was starting to bubble inside him.
“I just don’t know what to do with the cats. I’ve asked a bunch of people, but everyone’s busy.”
“I’ll watch them!”
Jin blurted out, almost too excited.
“Are you sure? I’ll pay you if you want to-“
“No, no need to pay me. Don’t have anything happening next weekend anyways.”
“Weren’t you going out of town to see your parents next weekend?”
Namjoon asked with confused brows. Jin mentally cursed him for almost ruining his plan.
“No, that’s the weekend after. I’m completely free next weekend, ready to watch some cats.”
You smiled at him, he had missed that smile so much. To ever think that he didn’t like your smile was insane. What was even more insane was the fact that he blindly said yes to watch your cats, just to be in your house. But he’ll happily feed those little fuckers if it meant that he had full access to your home.
“Again, thank you so much. You’re a life saver!”
You yelled out the window of your car as you and your boyfriend drove away. He waved goodbye as he watched the car slowly disappear in the horizon. Once you were gone he hurried into your apartment, ready to snoop around. He only did it to get to know you more of course. He wanted to know every single little thing about you that only your home could reveal. He sat down on the sofa on the exact spot where he saw you have sex. He felt the soft fabric between his fingers, thinking of that night. He slowly laid down face first, wanting to be close to the spot where you sat completely naked. He rubbed his cheek on it, slightly smelling hints of your perfume. He could stay like that forever. Just frolicking in your scent.
But one of your cats jumped up beside his face, ruining the moment. He got up, annoyed at the grey fluffy animal. He silently pushed the cat off, but when it once again jumped up beside him he decided to look around somewhere else.
He found the bathroom, opening up the cupboard next to the mirror. Some makeup, some skin care, tweezers, tampons. Nothing exciting. He opened the door to your shower, nothing but numerous soaps. He looked over at the bin for a second and wondered if he was willing to go that low. Once he saw your dirty laundry he decided against it. He opened the lid and started digging, a mixture of your perfume and your natural scent hit him. He had never been happier. He suddenly stopped and pulled out a singular thong. It was baby pink with lace. He imagined how good you would look in it. He stuffed it in his hoodie, deciding to venture off to your bedroom.
He immediately opened the nightstand, hoping for something good. And you delivered. Toys of all kinds in different flashy colours. He smiled as he picked up the hot pink dildo. He wondered if you ever thought of him while using it. The thought alone making his pants feel tighter. He walked back to the sofa, he knew what he wanted to do now.
Jin was watching tv in your house once he heard the door open. He knew you would be arriving that day, so he managed to be on his best behaviour and not jerk off in every room of your apartment that day. Small things to make you happy. He quickly got up to welcome you.
“You got home quite late, I was starting to worry.”
No he wasn’t, he knew exactly at what time you would be home. He found a copy of your reservation at the hotel and calculated the time it took for you to get here. But he wanted you to know that he cared.
“No need, I’m home.”
You gave him a forced smile. Something was wrong. A feeling of excitement rushed through him. You came home alone, did this mean that-? Did you really break up with Hobi? He held back a smile.
“Here let me help you.”
He said and reached for your suitcase. Your grip tightened.
“No it’s fine.”
You simply said and rolled it into your apartment. He headed you sigh. He wanted to wait a little longer to see if you would break. Hoping that you would tell him the good news and not let the suspense kill him.
“Can we talk?”
You asked and looked back at him, removing your coat. He nodded understandingly as he took your coat before you could protest and hung it up. You walked over to the kitchen table and sat down. Putting your head in your hands.
“Do you want something to drink? I can make you-“
“No, Jin. Please just sit down.”
You were visibly upset, so he followed up on your request. Sitting down opposite of you. You took a few seconds before you started talking.
“Do you care to explain why you did what you did while I was gone?”
You asked and looked up at him. He froze. This was not the good news he was expecting. This wasn’t happening. How could you know?
“What are you talking about?”
He said and tried to laugh it off. You shook your head.
“So you’re telling me you have no idea what I’m talking about?”
You asked strictly. He gulped.
“No, y/n. I’ve just been watching your cats. Did I do something wrong?”
You let out another sigh before you pulled up your phone. You touched the screen a few times before your turned it around, showing him exactly what you were talking about. He watched in horror as he saw himself in your bed with his hand around his dick. The other hand was holding your underwear under his nose.
“There are many more of these videos.”
You said as you retracted your phone.
“I don’t need to see them.”
He quickly answered as you put your phone back in your pocket.
“Fine, but I want to know why, Jin.”
His mind was racing. How the fuck was he supposed to dig himself out of this one? You had physical proof now. He couldn’t deny it anymore.
“I didn’t know I was being filmed.”
He muttered as a poor excuse.
“Me neither. I set those cameras up when I didn’t think I would find someone to watch the cats. Unfortunately for you I forgot to take them down.”
He went silent again, slipping his hands into his deep pockets. Feeling around, trying to come up with a solution.
“Please tell me you have a logical explanation for all this. Why did you masturbate every single day with my stuff while I was gone?”
You seemed more upset that you couldn’t make any sense out of it, compared to what he actually did. Maybe if he just confessed you would forgive him.
“I like you, y/n. No, I actually think I love you. I’m in love with you.”
He blurted out. You were taken aback at his sudden honesty.
“I don’t understand why, I used to hate you. I never liked you. But ever since the incident in the taxi I haven’t been able to take my mind off you.”
He reached for your hand over the table, but you quickly pulled away.
“I love you, y/n!”
“So why didn’t you tell me? Why did you do this instead? You realise how fucking crazy you sound right now, right?”
You snapped back at him. Coughing slightly afterwards at your sudden outburst.
“Let me make you a cup of tea, it’ll help with that cough.”
He said calmly. You shook your head.
“I don’t want tea, I want you to leave my house right now!”
“Please, can we just talk about this like adults? I don’t want to fight with you.”
You stopped, wanting to hear what he had to say.
“Let me put the kettle on, and I’ll tell you everything. Just please, I care about you.”
You touched your throat as you slowly nodded. He quickly got up and started the kettle.
“I did it because I didn’t want to ruin your relationship. I saw how happy you were with Hobi. I thought this was my only way to be close to you.”
He tried his best to get you to feel sorry for him. He knew you would be much better off with him than that excuse of a boyfriend you had. He just wanted to pull on your heartstrings. Even if it was completely a lie.
“I just- sorry. I’m sorry. But I’m crazy about you, y/n. I’ve never felt like this before. I didn’t know what to do.”
You looked down at the table as he prepared your tea.
“Do you want sugar and milk?”
He asked carefully.
“Just sugar.”
You answered after a few beats of silence. You were clearly fighting some sort of mental battle. But it was alright, he was going to make that decision for you.
“I really care about you. I’ve been nothing but a dick to you, I know. But I want to make it up to you.”
He placed the tea on the table before you. You stirred it a couple of times as you waited for the tea to get ready.
“It’s just really uncomfortable, Jin. Yes I used to have a crush on you but that doesn’t give you the right to do such things.”
You scolded him as you brought the cup to your mouth slightly blowing at the hot beverage.
“Again, I’m sorry.”
He said and bowed his head in fake defeat. This wasn’t his loss. Sooner than later you would be his.
“I don’t know if I can forgive you. I need time to think about all this. It’s all too much for me right now.”
You took a sip, feeling the sweet warm drink soothe your sore throat. You immediately took another big sip to get the feeling back.
“I get it. I’ll give you all the time you need when we get to your new home.”
He said bluntly. You crossed your eyebrows at his comment.
“My new home?”
He nodded.
“You’ll love it there. Just you and me. We can spend as much time as you’d want to heal all the shitty things I’ve done to you.”
You shook your head.
“What? What are you talking about?”
You felt your sight getting blurry, your body suddenly felt really heavy.
“What- what have you done to me?”
You slurred as you fell back in your chair. Tears forming in the corners of your eyes as you felt yourself loosing control of your body.
“It’s ok, baby.”
Jin got up from his chair and walked over to you. In your last efforts you slung yourself off the chair and onto the floor, trying to crawl away from him.
“I’m sorry, but I had to do this. I’m sure you’ll forgive me once you realise what an amazing life we’ll have together.”
He bowed down and grabbed you. Making you look at him. Finally you would be his and his only.
“Fuck you.”
You managed to say before the drugs made you close your eyes and fall limp in his arms. You looked beautiful, he thought. Like sleeping beauty just waiting for him to save you. It would probably take some time for you to forgive him, but like he said, he would give you all the time you needed. And eventually you would realise that you were made for each other. He would make sure of that.
——————————————————————————
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#bts yandere#yandere!bts#yandere bts#bts x fem!reader#bts x reader#bts smut#jin#jin x reader#jin x y/n#jin x you#kim seokjin#seokjin x reader#yandere#yandere jin x reader#yandere seokjin#yandere!seokjin#yandere seokjin x reader#yandere jungkook#bts seokjin#seokjin fanfic#kim seokjin x reader#kim seokjin x you#kim seokjin x y/n#yandere kim seokjin#jin x fem!reader#seokjin x y/n#seokjin x you#seokjin x fem!reader#send me asks#bts fanfic
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— sharing ★ with: bts
#pairings: bf!jungkook X friends!bts X reader
#synopsis: where your boyfriend decides to ask his friends what they want to see
#tags: pwp, group sex, blowjob, rough oral sex (m.), fingering (f.), humiliation, degradation, cumslut, spit, sperm, tears, free use (?). aftercare mentioned but not shown. mention of bisexual jungkook
#notes: this is more fetishistic than usual on this blog, so DON'T READ if you're uncomfortable with 7 guys cumming on your face and swearing at you.
#wc: 2,2k
you see your friends after a months, like since you and jungkook are living together you don't see them. it's funny, cause you are friends an years ago, but at a some months you just can't see each other.
"you're so hot dressing like that, maybe if we fuck before the guys comes..." jungkook said lifting your skirt and rubbing your hole.
"namjoon text me, he said that come in five minutes with the guys"
"i promise that i can make you cum in five minutes"
you laughed, because you know that’s real…
but the other six guys are at your door in five minutes. not just six guys but six best friends of yours.
"i know that we fucked yesterday, but god, i need eat your pussy again, i'm addicted, i need fuck you every hour, every minute, every second, night after night..." despite the completely dirty speech, jungkook was kissing his shoulder calmly.
“the guys are coming in any minute” you tried to convince yourself.
“don't be so mean to me, give me that dirty little hole, please”
jungkook moved one of his hands up to the thin strap of your shirt, pulling it down and exposing your nipples, he turned you around, putting his mouth there without any ceremony. you were used to your boyfriend's tongue, how he sucked and bit the nipple of your breast with devotion.
and then the doorbell rang.
"jungkook, stop, the boys are here." you tried to stop your boyfriend.
"i'm sure they wouldn't mind seeing me fuck you, baby. and you don't mind showing how that tight hole stretches with my cock, sure?”
god, this is a FUCKING true, you and jungkook are worse than each other, but more than showing, you'd easily let them stretch you too!
"i know exactly what you thought, dirty little girl." he said before going back to sucking your nipples.
and then they rang the doorbell again.
"holy shit!" jungkook complained, going to open the door, you are trying clumsily to put your clothes in place.
when the other six men entered your house you smiled, you missed them, namjoon was the first to hug you, leaving a kiss on your forehead in a gentle way, and damn, you had seen some photos he posted at the gym, but he was BIG…
seokjin came next, the tall man kissing your hand before giving you a cute hug.
and after, jimin came, leaving a wet kiss on your cheek as he always did, the blonde guy had a scent that was enough to make your panties even wetter.
shit, jungkook shouldn’t have teased you.
you noticed that taehyung whispered something to yoongi, who laughed, muttering something like 'have decency?' and only then did you notice that, probably due to jungkook's saliva, her breasts were wet, and the thin shirt clearly marked this.
"oh, yes! you disturbed us, i was dying to fuck my wife and you arrived."
a lot of things happened in that sentence, jungkook calling you 'my wife' and mainly, him exposing your sex life to all his friends.
it's not like they didn't imagine, you were friends before you and jungkook dated, the other six knew what you were like, and how jungkook was too, it was a matter of adding a + b, sometimes they would say something in the group chat, but It was the first time they had said something like that in front of them.
"if you want to fuck her, i don't care, as long as i can watch. it's not like i've never fucked you guys." hoseok said as if she wished a 'good morning'.
and that was the truth, besides jungkook, you had already had sex with at least four of your friends, and the same went for him, it's very likely that that's why he wasn't jealous.
"oh, can i? because i really want to do this."
god, your boyfriend was a perv.
“please, i miss seeing her tits.” namjoon confessed, reminding you of how he loved being on top of you, sucking your nipple to make you relax on his fat cock.
“dude, respect my girl!”
jungkook scolded namjoon, but you knew it was a joke as soon as your boyfriend came behind you, pulling the strap of your shirt down and exposing your breasts to his friends.
if you stopped to think about it, you would think it was crazy, your boyfriend sharing you with six other guys, but on the other hand, the other six guys were your friends, and you wanted much more than just looks at you.
“does anyone want to see anything else?” jungkook asked, making you feel your panties soaking, you felt like an exposed slut, a trophy, and that would never be a bad thing.
"her panties" seokjin said, looking at you with devotion, you had never done anything other than kiss him at a party.
“i want something” taehyung said.
"what do you want to see?"
"i want to see her on her knees sucking my cock." it was direct.
"if you suck taehyung's cock you'll have to suck mine too!' yoongi spoke up.
"and certainly mine too." jimin said, rubbing his thumb across his lips.
“let me get this straight,” jungkook scratched his throat. "are you saying to my face that you want my wife to give you a blowjob?"
"it was you who offered her to us like a prostitute." hoseok spoke up, unbuckling his belt.
god, you never felt so horny, your boyfriend and your friends discussed you as if you were even in that room.
"what do you think about this, baby?" Jungkook asked you.
"well..." you just walked around the counter, heading towards the sofa (being followed by the seven men as if they were puppies), and then removed your skirt and the blouse that was around your waist.
jungkook came to you, kissing you as you removed his clothes, his fingers brushing the white lace of your wet panties as you let out little moans into his mouth. your boyfriend was completely turned on, rubbing his pecs on your nipples making you moan even more.
"my little slut is so greedy, seven guys in your mouth? will you be able to handle it?"
"i need to get it!"
"good whore!" he kissed you one last time. "you don't deserve that much, organize yourself to kiss her in pairs, and you know her and the word, anything I'll insist on killing each one of you.”
jungkook barely finished and jimin and seokjin came close to you, jimin from behind, pressing his already hard cock on your back, and seokjin on your belly, at that moment you wanted both of them inside you, but all you got was seokjin sucking and nibbling your nipples while jimin kissed you and played with your wet panties. you moaning to the two of them while the other five watched everything.
you didn't even notice when taehyung and yoongi arrived, their firm hands using you to rub themself, it was pathetic, the pinch that yoongi gave your left nipple while your hand was inside taehyung's pants made you scream in pain, but mixed with pleasure, you liked that aggressive way.
"are you going to call me daddy again tonight?" namjoon asked as he approached you with hoseok, sticking two fingers into your pussy without any warning when hoseok’s kissing you “i missed that drippy messy hole.” namjoon goes fast, he starts scissoring his fingers inside you, you moan so loud because everything is even hotter when you see all those other men looking at you.
"i think the guys will like to see this" hoseok moved out of your way, exposing everyone to the image of you moaning into namjoon's fingers.
"so pretty our bimbo slut!" jimin said, watching the scene.
your boyfriend wanted to tell namjoon to stop it, take you to the bedroom and fuck you until his body shut down, but just seeing how much fun you were having with it all made him wait.
namjoon adds a third finger in without warning and you're feel so humiliated, leak around his hands when he fucks his fingers in and out of your cunt at an insane rhythm.
"tell your boyfriend how much you miss my cock opening all that hole, how much you miss your girl juices running down my cock. how you love look at my cock crammed in your tight pussy” and then he took his fingers out of you, rubbing them on your lips and forcing you to kneel on the floor. “you're not going to cum, unless whore, you're going to shove our dicks down your throat and let us cum all over your body, then your boyfriend sees what he does to you full of other men's cum”
and then you noticed the other six men approach you with their dicks in their hands, taehyung was the first to pull your hair, and you were agile with your warm tongue tracing his dick up and down.
while his tongue was still on taehyung, hoseok rubbed his balls in your face, and you tried to grab them on your tongue too, but it was in vain.
“jungkook you date a prostitute!” seokjin said when you grabbed his dick, starting a masturbation.
"i'm sure she can handle two" jimin said, shoving his cock along with taehyung's down your throat.
and you sucked it, not even you know how, but you sucked it like it was the most delicious lollipop in the world while they both thrust hard into your throat.
at one point in the night, you had jimin and taehyung's dick in your mouth and seokjin and hoseok one in each hand. namjoon, jungkook and yoongi took turns rubbing their dicks over your body and slapping your chest and face.
jimin took his dick out of your mouth, and you fit seokjin's cock, watching from the side as jimin started jerking off.
yoongi was in your right hand, you caressing his balls.
you felt some tears in your eyes, sometimes hitting your friends' thighs to make them stop for you to breathe, before returning to the aggressive pace.
the feeling was much more pleasant due to the environment than the sexual act itself, since you could barely actually suck the dicks, every time someone was coming in and out of your mouth.
"i think this stupid bitch was too greedy, she hasn't choked on my dick yet" namjoon complained, making you release seokjin and hoseok's dick that were in your mouth, when the two came out, an absurd amount of saliva ran out of you, it was humiliating, but you didn't have much time to think as soon namjoon grabbed your hair and made your nose touch his pelvis.
and then yoongi and jungkook joined him, rubbing their balls all over your face while you just opened your mouth and gladly accepted whatever they gave you.
"you look like a bitch in heat, trying to suck all these dicks when you clearly can't!" yoongi complained.
and this triggered a series of humiliations.
"disgusting mouth, can't even suck dick properly!" jimin said.
"i'm ashamed to say that that mouth touched my dick." seokjin said as he buried his throat on his cock, making you cough and cry.
"i think the only good hole in you is your pussy." namjoon said shortly after spitting at you, encouraging the other six to do the same.
no matter how much they cursed and humiliated you, you had never felt so good, the feeling of having seven men in a circle around you was inexplicable.
and when hoseok left your mouth just to cum you felt even better.
his sperm falling down your face and breasts, mixing with that of jimin and taehyung who came soon after.
“our cumslut, so disgusting, free whore, thank u, jungkook” taehyung joked, grabbing your hair.
you came back with namjoon's dick in your mouth, choking and coughing several times as he fucked your mouth with even greater force than he used to do in your other holes.
“dating jungkook made you stupid, that mouth doesn't do anything right!” namjoon shouted, pulling his dick out of your throat only to spit a thick string of saliva there and hit you on face.
your face full of other guys cum while he was still sucking namjoon was what made your boyfriend cum on your face, making namjoon's big cock a little dirty.
"be useful at least a little and make me cum in that throat" yoongi said.
you put yoongi's dick back in your mouth, sucking it and namjoon's as they fucked you, and you saw stars as they came together and filled your throat, so full to the point that it leaked out of your mouth even though you tried to swallow.
you cum, without any stimulation other than the humiliation and the cum on your body, you just came so hard that your body shook.
you were a mess, your entire body and the room floor is a mixture of tears, cum, and spit. and you were still fucking wet.
"do you want some help with her?" your friends offered, after putting on your clothes and seeing that you were completely destroyed.
“no need,” jungkook thanked. "i take care of my princess."
and then the other six walked over to you, giving you a careful peck on the mouth before being led to the door.
#bts x reader#bts x you#bts smut#bts#bts x fem!reader#bts x y/n#jungkook x you#ao3#jungkook smut#jk x you#jk smut#jk x reader#jk#namjoon x y/n#namjoon x you#namjoon smut#namjoon#rm#rm smut#kim seokjin#seokjin smut#jin smut#seokjin x reader#seokjin x y/n#yoongi x y/n#yoongi x you#yoongi x reader#yoongi smut#jung hoseok#hoseok x reader
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Waterlog || pjm (1)
Pairing: Jimin x Reader
Other tags: Olympic Swimmer!Jimin, Ex Olympic Swimmer! Reader, Swim Coach!Reader
Genre: Strangers to Friends to Lovers!AU, Coach!AU, Swimming!AU, Age Gap!AU, HEAVY Angst, Slow Burn, Mutual Pining, fluff, eventual smut, I'm so soft for these two it's crazy.
Word Count: 17.4k+
Synopsis: After a car accident ends her athletic career, Y/N has slowly started rebuilding her life again as a high school swim coach. That’s until she gets a request from an old friend and finds herself back in the spotlight as the new coach of Olympic swimmer, Park Jimin.
Warnings: discussions of significant death (does not happen in story), talks of a bad car accident, talks of drunk driving (please drinking responsibly), more than likely wrong swimming terms and poor understanding of how the Olympics actually works (I did so much research, pls be nice to me lol), strong language, lots of mental health discussions, reader has mommy and daddy issues, Older reader, Jimin is a complete sweetie, the tamest chapter of them all
A/N: Well, well, well, look who came back. I first wrote Waterlog back in 2021, and while I enjoy the premise, I hate the finished product. I wanted to go back and edit/fix what I originally had, but when I tried it became so different, I was better off rewriting the entire thing. I hope you guys like this mini-series. If you would like to read the original go to my blog archive. Thank you for reading!
masterlist || next || playlist
Staring at the pool, I managed to calm myself with relative ease. Jin had been right, physical therapy had made things easier. The water glistened prettily in the lights, and I waited with bated breath for my trainer to come in.
Emery was a sweet guy, pretty with a lip ring and tattoos, but with a surprising amount of shyness it was laughable. His softness was offset by his powerful muscles, and I enjoyed his never-ending sense of humor. Unlike Dr.Maddox, Emery treated me like I was a normal person. Not an Olympian who almost lost her leg in an accident, or the woman whose fiancé died. I was just Y/N, and it was a relief to be around him.
Running my fingers along the scars on my leg, I mindlessly drew patterns around them in the silence. It was not normal for Emery to take this long, but his assistant had said he was running behind due to another patient, so I was unbothered. I had planned my entire day around this, so I was in no rush.
Finally, the door swung open revealing a disheveled Emery. Breathing heavier than usual, he rolled his eyes at me in frustration before saying his pleasantries. Whoever it had been had gotten him worked up.
“Rough morning?” I asked, raising an eyebrow.
With an annoyed sigh, he nodded.
“I shouldn’t say this, but I hope that woman never comes back here.”
I laughed, “We all have that someone. Don’t feel too bad.”
Shaking his head, I could tell it took restraint on his part not to rant and rave about the woman who had left. Emery and I were more friendly than most. I had been seeing him for over two years now, but we still kept a semblance of a professional relationship. Especially Emery.
“How’s the kids?” He asked, making small talk as we started getting ready for a swim.
I was the coach of a high school swim team in town, something I talked about quite a bit, and Emery always liked hearing about. He was a great water polo player but chose to go into physical therapy while he was in college. After seeing one of his friends get injured and how much physical therapy had helped him, Emery decided to change his major. Four years later, he says he could never see himself doing anything else.
“They’re doing well,” I said honestly. “We got a couple of freshmen on the team, but they’re doing a lot better than I thought they would.”
Emery hummed, offering me assistance getting into the pool. While walking had been mostly figured out, the obvious limp aside, I still had some trouble with getting in-and-out of things. Even my bathtub had to be switched out since I was unable to step over it. I still used the medical chair while in there, too.
The water was cool against my skin, and I felt instantly relieved. The dull aches and pains left as soon as I got into the water. Swimming to my usual spot, I waited patiently for Emery to join me.
“That’s great to hear,” He smiled.
Going to the edge of the pool, Emery grabbed a set of barbells and handed them to me. Taking them, the two of us went over the workout plan for the day. Pulling himself up on the pool’s edge, Emery picked up his stopwatch and told me to begin.
Getting on the interstate, I sang along to the radio as I made my way to Hoseok’s. The two of us had been friends since high school, our mutual love for swimming making it impossible to keep apart, and only growing with time. He was one of my biggest support systems after the accident. Both of us had retired years ago now, but I remembered our days as Olympians fondly. Those were the best years of my life.
A small group of our friends were getting together at his house to watch the summer Olympics this afternoon. The women’s swimming finals were happening today, and I knew two of the girls competing. Turning on my blinker, I quickly got off the interstate.
Pressing around my car’s radio screen, I went to my contacts and pressed Andy’s number. She was off today and in charge of getting everything together. Hoseok had tried to do it himself, but always seemed to forget who should do what and ended up buying everything himself. She picked up after the fourth ring.
“What’s up, sugar?” Andy greeted, her voice soft and light. Her Memphis accent was thick and brought a smile to my face. Everyone had made jokes about her being southern when we first met. “Don’t tell me you’re missing Nationals.”
I shook my head even though she could not see me.
“I’m on my way,” I replied. “What should I pick up? I completely forgot.”
Andy sighed, “You’re just as bad as Jin.”
Seokjin was Andy’s husband. The two of them had been together whenever they moved to Colorado, married before I ever met them, and became quick friends with Hoseok when they moved to the Springs. That was how I had met them. Whenever their daughter Dani was born, Andy had asked me to be her Godmother and I sobbed in her lap. They were my closest friends next to Hoseok. Jin was indeed very forgetful, though, and the jibe made me chuckle.
“Cut me some slack,” I argued. “I’ve been working out for two hours straight.”
I could hear the smile in her voice, “Just get some pizza or something. We’re picking up some wings and Hobi’s in charge of the drinks. Minho and Tilly are bringing… something. I don’t even know anymore.”
Fully laughing now, I saw a Little Ceasars up ahead and got into the correct lane. Minho and Matilda were loose cannons when it came to our parties. While sweet, and fiercely loyal, I found myself wondering why I hung out with them at times. We were night and day personality wise, but I loved them dearly. Minho would probably bring some Korean side dishes from home, and Matilda would pick up a few packs of ramen from the store. Andy was stressing over nothing again. I hoped she was getting proper rest on her days off.
“I’m at Little Caesars,” I told her, parking my car. “I’m going to get the basics. How many things of Crazy Bread should I get?”
She thought for a second before replying.
“Five?” She was definitely unsure about her answer.
It was hard to gauge just how hungry everyone would be, and Jin was a bottomless pit.
“Sounds good,” I said instead, already thinking about getting more.
“Drive safe. See you in a bit.”
“See you, Andy,” I unplugged my phone from the charger.
Pressing it to my ear, I pressed my start button and turned it off. I climbed out of my car and started walking to the store.
“Love you,” She sing-songed playfully.
“Love you, too,” I replied. Opening the door, a worker greeted me with a smile. “I’m about to order.”
Shoving my phone in my back pocket, I gave the worker an awkward smile before telling him my order. I ended up getting seven bags instead of five. Just in case. Dani really liked the stuff and Jin could smash an entire bag by himself. While I waited for the cheese pizza to come out of the oven, my phone started ringing.
“Hello?” I answered, unable to check the caller ID while the cashier shoved the crazy bread into my arms.
“I heard from a little bird that you’re thinking about competing again.”
I grinned and thanked the cashier as she handed me my other pizza.
“Hello to you, too, Frank,” I replied. “And your little birdie wouldn’t happen to be Hoseok, would it?”
Frank and Sarah Boone had become a part of my life after the accident. They ran a local support group to help those affected by drunk drivers to get connected with resources and therapy. The two had lost their son when he decided to drive home drunk from a party and used the group as their own coping mechanism. They were wonderful people and owned their own joint coffee shop and bookstore in Denver.
“Won’t say names,” He chuckled, “But it might have come from a certain part-timer. So, is it true?”
I placed the boxes in the passenger seat and rounded my car. This was not a conversation I was expecting to happen today. I had brought up the idea to Hoseok since the Olympics were coming up next year, but I was not committed to it. I was enjoying my new job coaching and did not think I was in any condition for competition. When he brought up the Paralympics I laughed. Those competitors were in better shape than I was, and I doubted I would qualify. I was disabled but my disability did not (as far as I knew) carry over into the pool.
“I was just talking shit, Frank,” Backing out of the parking space, I put in Hoseok’s address and started to drive. Switching over to my car’s phone, I put my phone down and looked at the road. “You know I’m happy with my life right now.”
He made a grunting noise that told me he did not really believe me. No one did. All of them were sure I was miserable about my career ending far before its time, and while that may be true, I felt more loss about the life I was supposed to have than winning medals. I missed Namjoon more than any medal. Frank and Sarah understood that.
“I know that,” He cleared his throat, and I could hear the congestion. Frank had come down with a nasty case of walking pneumonia two weeks ago and was still recovering. “Just got a little excited is all. It would be nice to see you putting yourself back out there.”
It would be nice to see myself back in the pool, I could admit that. I had dreams of it at times. Being a competitor was a part of who I was. From the first time my dad took me to my swim classes when I was six all the way until I claimed my eighth Olympic medal, everyone had said there was nothing I hated more than losing. I was fiery, free-spirited, and kept my eyes on the prize. It was the thing Namjoon loved about me the most. That made me frown.
“I left a champ,” I forced a laugh. “Need to save some gold for the rest of them.”
Hiding behind humor was a pastime.
Frank laughed, oblivious to the hollowness in my tone. “Heard they have a new guy taking your place.”
That made me snort, “He’s not taking my spot. Totally different competitions, my friend.”
“Winning gold like you, that’s for damn sure.”
It must be Jimin Park. The kid turned up on the scene a year after my accident. He was a very, very talented swimmer. Fast as a bullet with the best butterflies I had ever seen, Park was a force to be reckoned with in the men’s league. It was a joy to watch him swim and this year would be his first Olympics. Hoseok and I were very excited to watch him.
“If you’re talking about Park,” I chuckled. “He’s far from new. He’s been competing for a few years now. First Olympics, though.”
“He’s young, ain’t he?”
I nodded, “23, I think.”
Truthfully, I did not know how old he was. I remember the buzz around how young he was when he first broke out on the scene. He was eighteen when he took home gold all season before a family emergency took him out of the Olympics last minute. No one knew what really happened, but his team had said his brother was in an accident, tragically losing his life, and Jimin was prioritizing his family. He’s competed every year since and with the Olympics next year, I was certain Park would be there. He deserved it.
I was parked in front of the house now and from the cars outside, I was the last person to arrive. Frank and I talked for a few moments. It was cute how much he had learned about swimming so we could be buddies. Sarah was the only person who recognized my face when I first started going to the meetings and her husband was determined to get me to open after weeks of sitting in bitter silence in the back.
We hung up after I promised I would make it to the meeting next Thursday. Frank was not happy about me skipping the past two weeks, but understood I was taking some time to myself. My boys were going to compete this year, I had fought tooth and nail for that funding, and the extra hours at school were exhausting. Jeremy and Evan showed promise, but they knew how to drive me up the wall with all of their simple mistakes.
As I suspected, the party was in full swing. Matilda and Minho were laughing loudly on the sofa, Hoseok sporting a beer in the recliner next to them, and Dani practicing her gymnastics in the middle of it all. I could hear the commentators talking animatedly about the girls, who they believed would come out on top and highlights from the night before, but I never really paid them any mind.
“Pizza’s here!” Minho boomed, practically running to greet me.
I laughed, handing over the boxes, “Need help carrying the rest in.”
Matilda offered, happily taking my car keys and leaving the house. Minho had disappeared into the kitchen. Dani spared me enough attention for a smile and wave before launching into excited pleas for me to watch her new moves.
“Super cool, babe,” I smiled sweetly after her handstand. Dani was not particularly good at gymnastics. She started later than the other girls, rarely did anything she was actively afraid of, and hated her coach. Andy was already looking for a better gym, but I just thought she should start pointing her in another direction. Dani loved dancing and she would be a wonderful ballerina or figure skater if given the proper training. The Kim’s, however, seemed fine watching her deal with gymnastics and cheerleading. “You’re getting better.”
Dani beamed, “Daddy said the same thing.”
Flipping the right way around, her hair coming out of its messily tied bun and falling down past her shoulders. Brown, loose waves made her look so much younger than her eight years, her small stature only selling the illusion even more. Her skin was smooth, and she always looked as though she had been playing outside in the sun, a constant tinge of pink beneath her sandy skin. Her features favored her father, large eyes, long face, and plush, pillow-like lips, but after meeting Andy’s parents, I could see her grandmother hidden within the mischievous glint in her eyes and too small ears.
“Your dad’s a smart guy,” I joked.
She continued to babble away as I made myself more comfortable, kicking off my shoes and tossing my hat onto the small buffet table that sat above the shoe rack. Matilda came back inside, her arms filled with bags of bread, and I took two from the pile. With a thankful, thin-lipped grin, she also complimented Dani’s moves before disappearing around the corner in the direction of the kitchen.
“Dani,” Hoseok seemed to have finally grown tired of hearing the girl talk. I would imagine this was all he had been hearing since he arrived. “Do you want to color with me?”
The little girl clapped happily, her eyes bright and shining, before abandoning her mat to gather a few coloring books and her massive hoard of crayons. Hoseok looked at me then, a sly smile on his face before winking. I chuckled and shook my head. He always did that to make her shut up.
I left the living room before Dani came back. I loved her dearly, but I could admit she talked too much. It was a good thing for a kid her age to be so social but that did not mean I wanted to hear her every waking thought. Andrea and Seokjin were the only parents in our little group, and I imagined it would stay that way for a while. Even if my dreams of children were still alive, I did not have anybody I wanted to take on that responsibility with.
Minho was eating the pizza, as expected, while Matilda had already claimed her own bag of Crazy Bread. Andy and Jin were snuggled up at their dining table, his arms securing her to his chest, and she curled into him. I loved watching them together. I had grown up in a house with two people who hated one another, barely kept up a facade of civility before my mother skipped down to be with her new boyfriend in Florida leaving my dad and I behind in Pennsylvania. We made it work but things were never the same after that. It made me happy to know little Dani would feel the love radiating in her home as she grew up. I had never seen two people so enamored with one another in my life- not even Namjoon and I.
“How was therapy?” Minho asked after we exchanged pleasantries. “Hoseok said you were talking about competing next season.”
I laughed in disbelief. That man did not know how to keep his mouth shut. I said the same thing I told Frank over the phone, and he scoffed. Minho never truly laughed, if I was honest. It was always a snicker, scoff, or chuckle. He was a man of little words and even fewer outbursts of joy, and I found his versions of those things just as reserved as the rest of him. He was the most expressive when he smiled, but those were just as rare as a genuine laugh. Dani managed to squeeze more out of him than anybody else.
“Stop meddling!” Andy scolded the other man from her spot in Seokjin’s lap.
“Never,” My friend replied, amusement clear in his voice.
“Never!” Dani echoed, voice louder than Hoseok’s. She was giggling happily alongside him, and I rolled my eyes. He was her favorite. “Never!” She repeated again, pleased when Hoseok laughed. “Never!”
“That’s enough,” Jin’s voice was even and smooth.
Dani did not shout again but we could all hear her and Hoseok attempting to cover up their laughter. Andy smiled fondly. Their little friendship had warmed her heart. After Dani, Andrea had been diagnosed with cervical cancer. It had come back six times before her doctor said she needed to get a hysterectomy. She grieved the children they would never have, the large family she dreamed of stolen from her, but once Dani was old enough to walk, she had been glued to Hoseok’s hip.
Hoseok for all he spoke about never wanting children, he adored Dani. His family was small, he and his sister the only children, but they were extremely close. She lived in New York City as a fashion designer and got married last year, and I always had the feeling Hoseok felt lonely without her. Dani was a welcome break from routine and made him feel special. It was sweet but I hoped my friend would find someone to share his life with someday.
“It’s starting,” Hoseok announced.
It was a great day for the U.S. Opal Simmons was one to look out for. She was the oldest woman on the team, a shocking 24, but she could out swim a vast majority of them. Her freestyles were amazing, earning her a gold with Japan just a few points behind. I was hopeful she would be able to come out on top in her distance swim. While not the fastest in the pool, the girl knew how to pace herself. The cameras cut to the shot of one of her coaches smiling triumphantly at the performance.
He was a good friend of mine, Oswald Bunch. He had been heavily involved with the Olympics for years now, promoted to one of the lead coaches back in 2020, but I remembered when he was still competing. A few years older than me, Ozzie was known for his backstrokes and long-distance swimming, and we bonded whenever we got the chance to meet in London back in 2012.
That was my first Olympics. I was a fresh-faced 20-year-old on a mission. My team at the time was stoked to have me around and I was excited to be there. I had built up a solid reputation over the course of two years, winning seven medals my first adult-competitive season, and the high was incredible. Back then, I was always the one to beat at the breaststroke and therefore, the medleys were in my favor as well. I walked away with 4 golds that year, and again in 2016. The accident happened a year later, but I left the competitive world with 8 gold Olympic medals and 19 world champion gold medals. Katie Ledecky held the record now, but for a time, I was the most decorated female swimmer in history. I was excited when I was finally passed up, happy for the younger woman.
Ozzie was the man, but sadly never got out of Michael Phelp’s shadow. It was not his fault. That man was insane in the water and would become the most decorated Olympian ever. Bunch was a great swimmer, but I did not know a single person who could compare to Phelps. Hoseok, maybe, but he only had 12 gold medals. Phelps had 23.
“Simmons looks great out there,” Hoseok praised, a large smile on his face.
“Her butterflies could use a little work,” I murmured back, already seeing how I could fix it with some extra exercises. “It’s slowing down her freestyle. What else is she scheduled for?”
“I think she’s doing the 200-meter freestyles and the medley relay,” He replied, taking a sip of his beer. “Bunch is banking on her pacing.”
“She won’t win those,” I was positive. “She’s just going to get tired. Breaststrokes are obviously not her thing.”
He laughed, “You’re the breaststroke queen, Y/N. No one's as good as yours.”
I shrugged, “Ledecky is a great swimmer.”
“Never said she wasn’t,” He sipped. “Her freestyles are killer. Girls could never beat you in breaststroke or a medley. You’re untouchable there.”
It made me smile despite myself. Hoseok was right, those were my competitions. Even if Katie had surpassed my record for most gold medals ever, I still had more Olympic medals than she did, and they were in completely different events. I could have kept my title had the accident never happened. I would have. Even if we were friendly, Ledecky would have been my competition, and I would have fought hard to keep the record.
“What’s Jimin doing this year?” Matilda asked as the women’s scores were posted. Opal would be a strong contender. “Anyone know?”
I nodded, “I haven’t watched every competition, but he’s sticking to what he does best. Didn’t he swim the 200 yesterday?”
“Yeah,” Hoseok replied. “He’s skipping out today and doing his individual tomorrow. Swimming back-to-back after that. Kid’s a fucking animal in the water.”
I couldn't agree more. As I stared at Opal’s smiling face, her pale blonde hair and bright blue eyes, I wished I had been able to watch Jimin instead. She was cold and impassive even with a large, perfectly white grin that took up most of her face. In fact, I found her quite boring outside of the water. No flair or features that set her apart. Just a tall, well-built blonde with a nice smile. Ozzie would have to work hard to make her memorable.
“Simmons did well,” I yawned. “It’s getting late, though, and I have work in the morning.”
The goodbyes were quick, and Dani made me promise to take her roller skating soon. There was a girl at school making fun of her and she wanted her “super cool” and “famous” aunt to tell them off. We all laughed, and I told her we could go this weekend after gymnastics practice.
My drive home was uneventful. It was already dark out, something that bothered me more than I would ever admit out loud, and I never turned on the radio. I preferred to drive in absolute silence, eyes and ears glued to the road. I had only started talking on the phone recently.
I was much worse after the accident. I refused to get inside of a car for weeks and if I did, I was a mess. No one was allowed to be a distracted driver either. No radio, no phone, no conversations. Nothing. Jin had been the default chauffeur during that time and put up with my anxiety better than the others.
It was close to a year before I tried to sit in the front seat again. Another five before I got behind the wheel. For hours I would sit in the garage with my hands on the steering wheel staring off into the distance. I was still in a wheelchair for most of my daily activities and a very obvious limp made me too self-conscious to be seen. Isolating was easy. Keeping the others away was more difficult.
My drives started with me just backing out of the driveway. I went around the block a few weeks later, hands shaking and Andy trying her best to soothe me in the passenger seat. I did not drive past the Whole Foods two minutes away from my house until after the second year. Things were easier after I ditched the wheelchair and got more open to the idea of therapy.
Moving out of Denver was the best decision I ever made, the Springs were easier to drive in and the traffic was not as awful. Andrea and Jin bought in Black Forest once I was settled in Briargate, so loneliness was never an option.
Matilda almost moved in after the housewarming party Andy threw for me. She said it was far too big for one person and the neighborhood was to die for. I laughed her off at the time not really wanting to admit how nice it sounded.
Nestled in Fairfax, my house was a beautiful piece of architecture. The striking brick and wood front exterior provided a warm welcome, with teal trimmings bringing a fresh feeling to the otherwise plain color scheme. With five bedrooms and four bathrooms, I dreamed of the day I was able to fill them all. A dream that I hoped would come before I hit 35.
Pulling up to the house, I waved to Chika next door. The old woman raised her hand, still nursing a large mug of what I assumed to be tea and smiled. They were lovely people and we often helped one another out whenever we could. Chika liked to bring over food if she cooked and I paid my landscapers to keep with their lawn.
“Late night?” Chika called out from her front porch.
“Went to a friend’s house,” I replied.
“Good,” She meant it. “Glad to see you getting out of the house.”
I smiled but was not sure how well she could see my face in the dark.
“Yeah. Night, Chika.”
“Night, Y/N.”
I showered quickly and sipped on a cup of chamomile tea before heading off to bed. After taking my night medications, one to force myself to sleep while the other blocked the never-ending nightmares, I climbed into bed. I was able to play a single game of solitaire before they both kicked in. I fell asleep with the sound of gentle rain humming in the background.
“Let’s go, guys!” I yelled, blowing my whistle.
The twelve boys waited, their small talk coming to an abrupt end. We had just finished warming up and I allowed all of them a short water break. I was a huge advocate for rest periods. No one needed to pull a muscle or fatigue early due to over working. I had a 2800-yard routine prepared, 800 of those done during our warm-ups, and the rest divided between our main set and cooldowns.
Jordan, our captain, was smiling happily. He was such an excited kid, and his positivity was contagious. While some of the boys were disappointed when I first chose him to replace our old captain after his graduation, I was sure his spirit would do everyone some good. It did not take long for the others to come around and he was beloved.
“Alright, so we have a 1600 main set. In between each of our reps, we will be doing a switch out of easy breast and backstrokes. Clear?”
“Crystal!” They all replied in unison.
“Alright. That's what I like to hear,” Flipping through my clipboard was more for show than anything. I used to rely on it heavily when I first started teaching since brain damage messed with my short-term memory, but I had been doing this long enough to know what was happening. Now it was just a way for me to write notes about their performances. “We’re starting with a 4x100 with 15-second rest; the first 25 butterfly. 3x100 with 10-second rest; again, first 25 butterfly. Following?”
No questions were asked, and a few guys voiced they were good for me to keep going.
“Good. Then we have a 2x100 with 5-second rest. First 25?”
“Butterfly,” Jordan replied.
“Thank you, Abbot. Okay, and we’re finishing up with 8x50 freestyle. Fast and easy.”
All twelve of them began to prepare to take their mark. One by one they stood on their blocks and waited for me to make the call. I admired them all for a moment. You could see the difference in each one of them. Those who were confident stood tall, their shoulders squared, and head held high. Newcomers were still figuring out their place on the team but were eager to prove themselves. Two of them would be leaving us this year, Gabriel and Marcus, and neither one of them were continuing to swim after graduation. It was a sad thought, but I was happy with how they carried themselves. They had both come a long way.
“Take your mark,” My voice echoed. Each boy got into their starting position as I watched them like a hawk. One of the freshmen, Phineas, needed major work on his form. I would talk to Jordan about it. Grabbing hold of my stopwatch, I took a deep breath. “Go!”
Marcus was the first in, like always, and I ignored him. I knew he was fully capable of taking care of himself. Phineas was the weakest link in my chain right now. He was struggling, his arms growing tired and his speed nonexistent. The other freshmen, Tobias, or as the guys called him, Twig, was not much better. He had more strength, but I chopped that up to his size. I would need to really start working some more beginner drills to get them in shape. Jordan and Gabriel would be more than happy to give up a Saturday or two to help out.
Marcus was the first one finished and I marked his time. Still a tenth of a second faster than Jordan. After Jordan came Gabriel and then Joseph and Anthony. I was disappointed in Jett’s time, but I would invite him to the weekend practices with the others. He needed some foot and hip exercises. Twig came in before Phineas, but every other boy was already out of the water by the time they made it back. Phineas was visibly upset, and I made a note to pull him to the side after practice to cheer him up.
Practices typically lasted two hours and the boys swam hard. Phineas did, in fact, perk up after I told him I was noticing tons of improvements in his performance. Twig just seemed happy he was not the worst guy in the water. After talking it out with Jordan, we decided on a good weekend time for extra practices, and I stayed behind to print off a poster and signup sheets for the rest of the boys. I had a feeling almost everyone except Marcus would show. He had a part-time job now and his weekends were full.
Sitting in my office, I poured over my observations and timecards. With a team this large I should have an extra set of hands to help with timing. I sent an email to the principal asking about helpers and got back to the nitty gritty.
All of them could work on something. Phineas might have needed the most work, Twig not far behind him, but my most seasoned swimmers had room for improvement. Jett was still struggling with maximizing propulsion, Anthony and Milo needed to get better water balance, and Gabriel’s pull could be better. Even my best swimmers, Jordan and Marcus, could use a bit of refinement in technique. It was nitpicking but they were too talented to give up on their potential.
It was close to nine when my phone began to ring. I knew it could not be any of my usual calls. Andy was working nights this week and Jin was fast asleep at home with Dani. Minho was in bed by eight, Matilda would never bother me this late, and Hoseok hated phone calls. Checking the caller ID, I was shocked to see Ozzie’s name.
“Hello?” I answered tentatively, afraid he might have called me by accident.
“Otter,” Ozzie greeted me happily. He seemed so delighted that I answered, I smiled even though I hated the nickname. “How’s life going?”
I chuckled, “Rockin’ and rollin’. Saw your girl last night. Looks great, Oz.”
“Appreciate it,” He was so dismissive of it I became interested. This was not a catch-up phone call or else he might have hooked onto the bait. My stomach twisted in anticipation. If it was not for pleasantries, then it was for work and that was something to be excited about. “Still teaching high school?”
“Mhm,” I fiddled with my pencil, papers forgotten. “My boys team is strong. I only have three girls that signed up so we’re just training during P.E. and hoping some more join.”
We chatted a bit more about the team. The longer it went on the more knots I had. Oswald was fishing for something, and I wanted to figure out what. After telling him about Phineas, I asked what the random call was about.
“Always cutting to the chase,” He joked.
I did not laugh.
“Alright, you caught me,” Ozzie sighed. “Look, the Olympic team is looking for another assistant coach and your name came up a few times.”
My mouth went dry. I had heard about Tiara Marsh leaving to focus on her family. She had a baby and stepped down a few months after coming back from maternity leave. I respected the decision and messaged her my congratulations. Ozzie had taken the lead coach position three years ago with Todd Packer as his partner. The other assistant, Drew Jones, was a sweet girl from what I heard and working with her would be a dream.
Still, it was an impossible task. Trying to imagine myself on the sidelines, coaching the next big names in sporting history with a massive squad behind me made my stomach queasy. I doubt any of them respected me. My leg was ruined, my career burned out just as quickly as it started, and I never had the chance to reach my peak. Now I am a 30-year-old washed up recluse. Just thinking about the media frenzy made my breathing get a little heavier.
“I don’t think that’s a good idea, Oz,” I murmured.
“I told them you wouldn’t go for it,” He replied, unsurprised. “They’re going to approach Storm Kline instead.”
“Oh,” Now I was confused. “Why’d you bring it up then?”
“Because I got to thinking,” I braced myself. Ozzie was known for his big, bright, dumb, impulsive ideas. “I knew the Olympics would be asking too much of you. Cameras and interviews are the last thing you want after the fucking circus you went through last time.”
That was an understatement. Circus did not even begin to describe the absolute hell the media put me through after the accident. So many speculations and insensitive remarks managed to ruin any peace I could have gotten during that time.
While I was in a coma, no one knowing if I would ever wake up again, the news thought it wise to harass my friends and family. My old coach, Victor Stanley, was assaulted whenever he left the hospital. When news got out that Namjoon was pulled off life support, his mother and father were so sick and tired of people parked outside their house they packed up and moved away before I even woke up. I wanted nothing to do with the media after that.
“It’s a little different but I think you’d be a great fit for the job,” Ozzie continued. “One of my boys, Jimin Park, is in need of a personal coach. His mom is sick and he’s wanting to stay in Michigan for as long as he can before coming out to the Springs to start training for Paris.
“I almost called Jung, but I don’t think the two of them would get along well enough for this to work. You’re the only person I know I can trust with him, and from what I’m hearing, you’re one hell of a coach already.”
This was somehow even more nerve wracking than the assistant position. I had never trained one-on-one before, at least, not long term. I was sure I could do it, but a high schooler was very different from an Olympic athlete relying on me to keep him in shape for the season.
“What happened to Hamilton?” I asked, still unable to wrap my head around the situation. “I thought he was Park’s personal trainer.”
“He was but the two fell out when Jimin decided to stay in Michigan. You know how Matt is.”
That I did. Matthew Hamilton was a massive asshole, and that was putting it lightly. He was one of the best trainers around and got results which was why he still had a job despite his rotten attitude. I had the misfortune of running into him quite a few times over the years and my distaste only grew with each passing. I could imagine that conversation not going over particularly well.
“But what about my team?” I asked, staring at my desk. All of my plans and strategies were mapped out and I was ready to put them to use. My boys were counting on me and leaving them felt wrong. “I don’t want to leave them high and dry, Oz.”
“Ask Hoseok to cover for you,” I rolled my eyes at his blase attitude.
“This is my team.”
“And this is Jimin Park.”
I hated that I understood where he was coming from. Most of my boys would never go off to swim professionally and their skill set was not on par with anyone out right now. They were not committed to the strict regime that would take and I did not get paid well enough to justify the extra hours. Jimin, however, would pay me extremely well and I would get that experience under my belt. I might even learn a few new things to add to my own drills.
“Give me a few days to think about it,” I finally conceded. “And set up a phone call, or meeting, or something with the kid. Need to make sure we’re on the same page before we waste one another’s time.”
Ozzie laughed, “I think you’ll get along just fine, but sure. I think he’d appreciate the gesture.”
Nothing of much importance was said after that. We hung up with promises of talking soon and then I was alone once more. My office was still just as messy and swamped with paperwork as it had been before, but it all looked different. It felt like I was already gone, and a deep homesickness settled in my chest. I stared at the papers in front of me and sighed before shooting a text to Hoseok.
As I expected, everyone had told me to jump at the opportunity. Hoseok even said if I didn’t, I would be the biggest idiot he had ever met. Matilda asked if she could come (I told her no), and Dani just seemed bummed that we could not hang out anymore. Andy and Jin were the most supportive of the situation while Minho the most cautious. He was worried about the media catching wind of something and causing a frenzy. After Matila pointed out how old news I was, I felt a little less afraid of that possibility even if it was a hit to my ego.
Ozzie seemed pumped when I told him I was open to the idea if Jimin and I seemed to mesh well. I was firm in my decision to talk to him before making any concrete plans, and from what Ozzie told me, my future student was extremely receptive to the idea. I also learned that Opal was jealous of her fellow Olympian, but I tried not to let that puff up my chest.
That was why I was sitting in my home office, hair nicely styled and a light layer of makeup on waiting for Jimin to join our Zoom call. I wore blue since Ozzie said it was his favorite color, but the material was slowly driving me insane. While the color was nice, deep blue and sparkled whenever the light hit it, it was scratchy and irritated the skin around my chest and shoulders. I almost got up to change but a small icon with the letters ‘JP’ in the center popped up before I could.
“Hello?” A soft voice called out.
“Hey,” I replied with an awkward wave. “Can you see me?”
“Yeah, can you see me?”
I shook my head, “Just your icon.”
Cursing under his breath, Jimin apologized for the tech issues. I adored how nice he was to listen to. It was unique, gentle and raspy, but also feminine in its softness. There was no bass or hardness, every sound and syllable light and airy with self-depreciating laughter after every insult he threw at himself. Apparently, Jimin was not great with technology and always had a difficult time with cyber meetings.
“This is fine with me,” I tried to reassure him. “I don’t need to see your face to talk.”
“No,” He agreed, “But it’s a little awkward for you to have your camera on and mine’s off.”
I could hear him clicking around. “I’ll turn mine off, too, if that helps.”
He shut that down immediately and continued clicking and typing. After a few more minutes, he found his problem. Then the icon was gone and there he was.
His face was round, his cheeks plump, and chin soft. The first thing I noticed about him was his lips. They were rounded and plump like a baby duck with a soft, heart shaped cupid’s bow that led up a small, button nose. Everything about his face was soft except his eyes which were almond shaped and flicked outwards like a cat’s. His hair was pitch black and parted down the middle, framing his face and making his pale skin look like snow. When he caught a glimpse of himself in the camera a large smile took over his face and I felt the wind get knocked out of me.
“Can you see me?” He asked.
I nodded, “Yeah, I think we’re in the clear.”
Neither one of us knew what to say for a moment. He swirled around in his chair in search of his water bottle. He stood up, excusing himself for a moment. He was also wearing a blue shirt, a pair of black pants, and seemed just as nervous as I did. He left the room while I sat and thought about him.
There was one word to describe Jimin: pretty. His soft lines and tiny waist made him look so much smaller than I had imagined him. All of the years seeing him on the tv did nothing to compare to watching him walk around a little room in his home. Without a cap and goggles, Jimin was angelic, and I felt uneasy. How was I supposed to work with someone I found this attractive?
“Sorry,” He was back now, a large Yeti cup in hand. “I should’ve made sure I had this already.”
“No worries. I’m not in any rush.”
He sat back down, and I finally noticed the large oval necklace he was wearing. I did not know what it could mean to him, but I had seen him with it a few times at events. It was simple and silver, no gem in the center of the pendant, and sat directly over his heart. He took a sip from his cup, snapping me back to action.
“How’s your mother doing?” I asked. “Ozzie told me she wasn’t well.”
His expression saddened me, and I hated that I brought it up. I knew how much I did not enjoy talking about Namjoon’s death, and while his mother was still alive, she was not well. Unfortunately, I could not take the question back.
“I’m not sure how much you know,” He started, leaning back in the leather computer chair. “She has melanoma and isn’t doing chemotherapy anymore. I’m staying in Michigan so I can spend as much time with her as possible.”
My heart ached for him and his family. Cancer had a reputation for ripping families apart and I could only imagine how this was affecting the young swimmer. My own grief was long and drawn out, guilt and shame hanging over my head for years before I was finally able to let it go, but the death itself was swift. Joon was dead and buried before I woke up from the coma, but I could recall every detail of that hospital room when Victor told me what happened. I hated to think about watching the life slip from him, knowing he would die, and knowing there was absolutely nothing I could do about it.
“I understand. I’m really sorry to hear that.”
I knew it was inadequate, but I did not know this man well enough to say my thoughts out loud. Maybe later, after a few weeks of training together, I could get the courage to let him know I would be there if he needed someone to talk to. I knew all about navigating grief and I would happily help him stay motivated through this horrible, tragic time. Jimin stayed quiet so I took it upon myself to get the ball rolling again.
“I know you’re going through a difficult time right now, and I just want you to know that I get it and I see you. If we work together, I will make sure your mental health comes first. Whatever you need, whatever your family needs, will always come before getting in the pool.
“You were working with Hamilton before this, and whatever happened between you two- I don’t know, that’s none of my business, but I can promise you I will try my best to make sure our professional relationship doesn’t reach that point. Just tell me what’s up and I’ll make it work.”
Jimin smiled a small, sad smile that paled in comparison to that blinding show of teeth earlier. My eyes could not help their roaming and I felt guilty. There was a chance we would be working together, and I could not feel this way about him if that time came. I could only hope that if we did decide to move forward with this arrangement, any affections I could have for him would get buried. I would have to talk to Hoseok about this.
“I have to take her to appointments once a week,” He replied, voice small and eyes staring at something off camera. “She’s not getting her chemo anymore but still goes to see her doctor often to manage symptoms as best she can. She also has a dance class every Sunday morning and I will be going with her.”
I nodded, “I can live with that. As long as you’re still putting in work you can take your mom anywhere.”
He took a deep breath and finally looked at the camera again. The vulnerability I found there took me off guard. Jimin must be someone who wears their emotions on their sleeve, and I would have to learn to nurture that. Namjoon always told me I needed to work on being more sensitive to others, a skill I had yet to master.
“Matt didn’t like how much time I spent out of the pool. I understand where he’s coming from but I’m hoping we can come up with a training schedule that works well for the both of us. I feel bad enough pulling you away from your life, and I don’t want my personal shit to bleed into what you’re going through.”
It was a kind gesture, one I appreciated, but he needed to get over it. I told him in so many words that I was happy to help him.
“Trust me,” I said. “If I didn’t want to do this then we wouldn’t be talking.”
Jimin seemed to like my bluntness and I was fond of his over-analytical anxiety. The way he fidgeted reminded me of Namjoon, his forward and direct confrontation of his emotions and needs so strikingly similar it made it nearly impossible for me to dislike him. I don’t think a person alive could dislike this man.
“I can be in Ann Arbor next week,” Jimin had gone on another rant about inconveniencing me and I shut it down. “Everything here is already squared away. We can discuss it more later, how does that sound?”
He smiled wearily, his nerves causing him to squirm in his seat.
“I’m really looking forward to working with you, Y/N.”
I hoped my expression looked as sincere as I felt, “I’ll take care of you, kiddo.”
Pulling a face, Jimin laughed heartily. Triumphant, I smiled brazenly, his laughter contagious. I made a note to pull out a few age jokes now and then if it meant making him smile like that.
“I’m an adult man, I’ll have you know,” He was still laughing.
“Could’ve fooled me,” I teased.
“We’re going to get along just fine,” He seemed more confident than ever, and it warmed my heart. “Let me know when you’re expected to get here. Do you have my number?”
We exchanged our contact details. After days of talking over email, I finally found a smiley face emoji in my notifications, a Michigan area code attached. Saving his number, I replied with the old woman emoji earning myself another laugh.
“Talk to you later, Park.”
“See you, coach.”
I left the meeting, my chest much lighter after talking to him. He was a sweet man and not half bad to look at. I was a few years older but not disgustingly so, and he was more than available from the sound of things. Realizing the direction my thoughts were going in, I stood up from the chair to start writing out some drills and scheduling prototypes. Before I could get out of the door, however, my phone vibrated in my hand.
Jimin: 👶
I did not respond until I had my flight booked.
Me: I’m flying in on Tuesday. Know a good place to stay?
He replied a few minutes later.
Jimin: Do you need a lot of space?
Me: Not really
Jimin: One of my neighbors has their mother-in-law suite for rent. I could probably cut you a good deal with them.
I smiled. He really was a sweetheart.
Me: Thank you. And no deals. I can pay for myself.
Jimin: My mother would be very upset if I didn’t at least try.
Jimin: I was raised to respect the elderly.
I laughed out loud, thoroughly amused. I had a feeling he was testing the waters after I poked fun at him earlier. Jimin was probably used to the stick stuck up Hamilton’s ass. He was in for a treat. At the pool I was cool and collected but I could cut up with the best of them.
Me: Sorry, couldn’t hear you over the sound of my hip breaking
I was practically giddy with excitement waiting for his response. It had been such a long time since someone joked around with me like this. Hoseok tried but he was awful at taking a joke, so I stopped poking the bear. It was refreshing and all too familiar.
Jimin: I’ll get you one of those life alerts just in case.
Was he flirting with me? Did I care? Shrugging, I went along with it. I would remain strictly professional while we worked together, but if things developed after that I would let them. Happily. I barely knew this guy, but I remember this feeling. It was the first time since Joon’s death that it showed itself to me and I wanted to hold onto it.
First work then play, I told myself.
Who knows? This little bit of infatuation could fade just as quickly as it came, and I would leave Ann Arbor with a new friend instead. Might even be able to score a steady job with the kid if things worked out. My life in Colorado would remain untouched, my friends happily accepting a new kid in the group when he came to visit, and my house just as bare and empty as it always had been. The years continuing to pass me by.
I tried not to think about why that thought made me want to cry.
“I told you I’m fine,” I sighed into the phone, waiting at the baggage claim for my things. “You’re in rare form today.”
Andrea laughed, the sound slightly hysterical and I winced. That was the wrong thing to say, but she was driving me insane. I had traveled around the world multiple times, and she was acting like Michigan was going to kill me.
“Well excuse me for worrying,” Andy bit back, her tone clipped and harsh.
“I’m sorry,” I heaved one of my bags off the conveyor belt. “I know you’re just looking out for me, but I promise you I’m fine Andrea. You’ll be my first phone call if that changes.”
The other bag finally popped up and I quickly snatched it. Slinging the large duffle bag over my shoulder, I adjusted it until it rested comfortably on my shoulders. Lifting the handlebar off my large suitcase, I drug it behind me while I followed the signs for the exit. Jimin said he arranged for someone to pick me up but did not specify who. He was busy with a few interviews this morning and could not get me himself. He had been very disappointed about it.
“I know I’m nagging,” Andy groaned. “Scratch that. I’m acting like a total helicopter parent.”
I laughed, “Your husband had been even worse. The man tried to book me a charter flight because he was worried about my leg in an airport. What the fuck does that even mean?”
Everyone had been super happy for me, especially my team. Those boys almost cried when I told them who I was helping out and Jordan begged me to bring him back something autographed. None of them seemed as familiar with my own background but I was fine with that. All of them took to Hoseok rather well, except for Marcus who made me swear to come back before school let out. I did not tell them I was planning to make monthly trips to give Jimin some space with his mom. I was sure that surprise would go over very, very well.
Despite his indifference when I was first talking about the job, Seokjin became an overprotective dad as soon as I made him aware my flights were booked. He was quick to cancel them and put in a few calls of his own. Jin was an operations manager for Delta airlines and knew plenty of pilots. He was able to get me a plane to land in Willow Run out in Ypsilanti, but I quickly intervened and told him a normal flight was perfect. I rebooked my tickets and flew into Detroit Metro at 10 am.
Andy snorted, “He means well.”
It was snowing in Michigan, and I was finally hit with the realization that I would be seeing far more of it here than I ever did back in Colorado. It was only mid-September, so it was still light and melted away quickly. I would have to ask Jimin if it stayed this calm into December, but I had a feeling things would pick up by late November.
It was a very cold morning in Detroit, and I was excited to get into a heated car. Getting off the phone with Andy, I quickly sent Jimin a quick text message letting him know I was outside and looking for my ride. A loud honk made my jump, almost dropping my phone in the process.
Pulled up at the curb was a navy-blue Volkswagen Beetle. I could tell from its body that it was an older model, and it was a convertible. Sitting behind the wheel was a little old lady, a pair of gardening gloves on her hands and a pair of large, hexagon sunglasses taking up most of her face. Her face was familiar, and it hit me. Sitting behind that wheel was Jimin’s mother.
She smiled at me and waved, beckoning me closer to the little car. I forced myself to smile back. My nerves made it feel damn near impossible, but I managed. Opening the door, I did not know where to put my things. The backseat was so small.
“There’s a lever on that side that’ll push it up. You should be able to get everything to fit if you try hard enough.”
Fumbling around, I finally found the little handle and pulled up. The seat lurched forward, folding in on itself, and I clumsily shoved my suitcase into the backseat. It smelled like stale cigarettes and fake pine, but when you had a car this old it usually had history. I was excited to pick up my new car from the dealership. My Porsche already had a difficult time driving around Colorado and I did not think it would survive the heavy winters in Michigan, so I decided to leave it home and get an Altima. I had the money and could easily get rid of it. Tilly had been talking about needing an upgrade.
Finally managing to get both bags into the backseat, I put the seat back and got into the car. Closing the door, I sighed in content. The heaters were at full blast and pointed directly at my cold face. Buckling my seatbelt, I leaned back and tried to relax after the long day of flying. Jimin’s mother pulled off the curb.
“It’s cold out there,” She laughed, her voice just as sickeningly sweet as her son’s. “Glad you were able to make it okay.”
I nodded, “I’m surprised to see it snowing so early. We don’t usually get anything until closer to Thanksgiving.”
“Colorado, right?” I could hear a faint accent and I remembered that Jimin was first-generation Korean American. Both of his parents moved to the states before he and his brother were born. Media outlets loved talking about it, but I was not sure how much he enjoyed discussing his personal life. While he came off as a sweet and mild-mannered man, he kept his personal life private. “I’ve heard it’s very pretty.”
“It is. Too expensive, but very, very pretty.”
Then she was fiddling around with the radio, and I finally cracked a genuine smile. I was not sure how much work had been done on her car, but I was positive the sound system had been completely redone. A brand-new radio, complete with a touch screen and Bluetooth, lit up at the touch of her fingers. A man’s voice serenaded us through the updated speakers, and I was in awe at how beautiful it sounded. I assumed he was speaking Korean and Jimin’s mother sang along fluently.
“What’s your name again?” She asked once the song was over. Another, more upbeat song started, and she increased the volume. “Jimin told me but I’m horrible with that sort of thing. I’m Na-Yeon, but Audrey works if it’s easier for you.”
I pulled a face, “Audrey?”
“It’s my American name. It’s easier for people to pronounce and more convenient. All of us have one. Jimin’s is Christian.”
It was odd to think about. A name that was mine but not mine. Christian did not suit Jimin, but I could imagine growing up with a name that other people made fun of would be difficult. Maybe even impossible. Still, I did not feel comfortable calling the woman Audrey. She did not seem to particularly care for the name and I did not want to alienate myself from their circle for convenience's sake.
Namjoon’s mother had been similar to Na-Yeon, always afraid her culture and customs would make me uncomfortable or burdened, but I managed to calm her fears and reassure her after years of showing up to Chuseok with a smile on my face and food in my hands.
“I like Na-Yeon,” I finally replied, voice small. “It’s nice. I’m Y/N.”
“I like Y/N,” She echoed back to me, making me grin. “It’s nice.”
It was a long drive filled with K-pop, ballads, and sporadic conversation. Na-Yeon was very funny. She sang along to every song, dancing as she went, and calling on me to sing alone. Of course, I could not speak Korean very well and hummed the melodies instead, but it appeased her. When she did speak to me it was to ask me questions about myself.
“You’re that swimmer, aren’t you?” She asked, sparing me a look once we stopped at a redlight. “The one everyone’s trying to beat.”
I shook my head, “At one time, sure, but not anymore. I’m retired.”
Squinting her eyes at me, Na-Yeon pursed her lips.
“We used to watch you. Haru called you a mermaid.”
That was not too much of a shock. Jimin was swimming at that time. While I am a few years older than him, he would have been in middle school when I went to my first Olympics. He had told me he joined the swim team the year before. He said that watching Michael Phelps win 6 gold medals changed his life forever, and I could not help but agree with him. I had a huge amount of respect for my fellow Olympian and wished him well in his retirement. What shocked me the most was the mention of Jimin’s little brother. The dead brother.
“That’s sweet,” I did not know what to say. “I felt like a mermaid back then. I’m not that good anymore but I still like to swim sometimes.”
“You were in an accident,” It was not a question. “We saw it all over the news. Couldn’t believe all of those people harassing your family like that. So sorry for your loss.”
It was strange to talk about it again. I appreciated her keeping it vague. I had gone through a tremendous amount of change and growth since then, but it was nice to hear someone else validate how crazy the media frenzy was. I would not wish it upon anyone, and I was happy her family was allowed to grieve in peace. Neither Namjoon’s nor my own were allowed that luxury.
“Thank you,” I replied. “I’m sorry about Haru. I can’t imagine what your family went through.”
She smiled sadly, “I think you can.”
We did not talk much after that. The music still played, Na-Yeon still sang, and I still hummed, but we did not ask any more questions. Neither one of us wanted to bring up those hurt feelings. It was not until we turned down a long, empty road that I realized I had yet to ask her about her cancer.
“Are you feeling okay?” I asked.
“As good as I can,” She breathed. “My boys are both worriers so don’t take anything they say to heart. Bunch of hypochondriacs.”
And even though I laughed along with her, I knew that she was lying. They were not overreacting. She was sick, refusing treatments, and letting herself die. Anyone would be worried about her. Na-Yeon must dislike being taken care of. Well, I thought she would need to get used to it. I loved spoiling others.
“Eloise and the kids must be here,” She muttered to herself, pulling to a short driveway.
I did not know who Eloise was, but I would soon find that out. There were two cars parked out front. One was a simple, black Tahoe with a brightly colored steering wheel cover. The other was another vintage model. Painted a pretty light, muted green the truck was in pristine condition. It was an old Ford, the branding written across the tailgate, and a spare tire was bolted to the side. I asked Na-Yeon about it and she smiled happily.
“It’s Jimin’s,” I felt my heart rate increase. “He must’ve gotten back. Pretty thing, huh?”
I nodded, not really paying attention to the truck anymore. I was about to meet Jimin for the first time and my nerves were taking over. I knew how much his looks affected me over video chat and I was afraid I would not be able to control my facial expressions in person. I was resolute not to act on whatever attraction I may have felt toward him. My professionalism would not allow it. It did not mean, however, that I wanted to discuss it with Jimin at any point. It would make him uncomfortable and affect our working environment.
“Keep your bags in the car,” Na-Yeon told me. “Jimin’s going to take you over to meet the Andersons this afternoon.”
Walking up to the house, I was first struck by two things. The main one being the impressive teal it was painted and the other the loud talking and laughter coming from inside. It was odd. Thinking about my own parents I knew we had never been so happy. Mom had left when I was so young that I could hardly remember her, but I could recall the screaming and shouting. Dad was quiet after she left, spent most of his time locked away in the garage watching sports channels and leaving me to my own devices.
When I started swimming it helped for a time, but when I was old enough to leave, we spoke two or three times a year. After he met Danielle, his new wife, he stopped reaching out altogether. The accident had spooked him enough to warrant holiday and birthday calls for a time, but when he had another baby those slowly faded away. My half-sister and I had never met, Danielle did not like acknowledging that my dad had a child with another woman, and it seemed as though my dad was fine with how things turned out. I dealt with it.
The laughing echoed through the house, and I could hear loud foot-steps pitter pattering on the tile floors. The house smelled heavily of kimchi and lemons making my heart ache. Joon and I used to keep the windows open for days after his mother came over to make kimchi with him. We would squat on the floor for hours, laughing and talking. I missed those days more than I realized and I smiled involuntarily. For the first time in years, it felt like coming home.
“Sorry about the smell,” Na-Yeon whispered to me.
I shook my head and took my shoes off. “I love kimchi.”
She smiled brightly, her shoulders immediately relaxing. I was glad I had spent so much time with Namjoon and his family. Na-Yeon was someone who wanted to make others feel more comfortable even if it put her own peace at risk, but I would never ask her to change her routine for me. I loved learning about other people and her little house brought me more happiness than I thought possible.
“Sounds like we have company!”
A short, stocky man came into the living room. He was wearing a white polo shirt and khaki shorts; his hair was very short with silver streaks starting to take over the once very black strands. Catching sight of me he smiled.
“You must be Y/N,” The man said. “I’m James.”
His accent was much thicker than Na-Yeon’s and he introduced himself in his English name. He seemed much happier about it than his wife did, and I decided to go along with it. If he wanted me to call him James, then I would.
“Nice to meet you,” I replied, giving him a small bow.
His smile got even bigger somehow, and he returned the gesture. Na-Yeon chuckled beside me and started to speak to her husband in Korean. I picked up a few words and deduced that he was supposed to make sure I was going to get a nice lunch, and she wanted to know if he had taken care of it. He nodded and told her he had.
“Hungry?” James asked, Na-Yeon already disappearing into the house.
“Yes,” I quickly followed behind him.
“I made jjigae,” He frowned. “I can’t say it in English. Sorry.”
The house was small and warmly lit. Cream tile flooring, exposed wood beams, and white walls. Whatever loud conversation they had been having before I got here had died down, but the footsteps did not. I could hear children giggling somewhere in the little home and my curiosity peaked. I did not think they were Na-Yeon and James’s.
“I want to say it’s soup,” I kept my voice down not wanting to make him feel awkward. “Or stew, but I don’t think it matters that much.”
“What’s the difference?” James asked, just as amused as his wife at my vague knowledge of Korean words. “Soup and stew the same, no?”
I shrugged, “I have no clue. I’m a miserable cook.”
That made James laugh. We passed all of the rooms in the house, the kitchen, living room, and dining room all in the back of the house. As we passed the second room to the left, James said it had been Haru’s photography studio before he passed away, but they ended up converting it once Eloise gave birth. He did not say it out loud, but I had gathered the kids running around had been their youngest son’s. I did not know how old Haru had been when he died, but it was far too young to be having children. I was 31 and still felt ill equipped for the job.
It was a small kitchen with very simple and plain colors. The countertops were obviously laminate, but someone had taken the time to stick on a marble patterning to make it look nicer. Black appliances clashed with the chestnut cabinets. The tiles were no longer cream but hideous black and white checker printed that clashed heavily against the olive-green backsplash. While the rest of the house seemed to go through renovations at some point, I had a feeling the kitchen remained largely untouched.
Sitting at a small table on the other side of the room were Na-Yeon, Jimin, and a young woman. She was a cute girl, long brown hair and blue eyes, a large number of freckles across her cheeks. Her outfit was very modest, a pair of flowy cream pants and an equally flowy olive shirt. Her hair was tied back with a ribbon that matched her pants, and taking a closer look at her, she wore no makeup. A classic girl next door.
“Come sit,” Na-Yeon waved me over, her voice showing no room for argument. “Hyun-Soo is in charge of lunch.”
I was only briefly confused, the name completely unfamiliar, but by the time I sat down I was sure she was talking about James. It made sense for her to call him by his Korean name, and since I had shown no qualms about using their proper names, she saw no need to bring them up herself.
“Nice to finally meet you,” Jimin’s sweet voice reached me, and I smiled at the sound. “I hope getting here wasn’t too bad.”
He reached out to me, and I happily took his hand in my own. The skin was soft, perfectly smooth, and warm. It was over far too quickly but my displeasure was easily hidden. Andrea always complained about my poker face and how difficult it was to get past it. She said it was too good and thus refused to ever play poker with me again.
“It was nice,” I meant it. Na-Yeon was wonderful company.
“Hope the concert was nice.”
That made me and Eloise laugh. Na-Yeon smacked Jimin’s arm playfully, unable to keep the smile off her face, and the two began to bicker. Having them in the same room highlighted the differences I hadn't noticed before. Jimin’s nose was closer to his father’s, his eyes, too, and both of them had a slight lisp. Na-Yeon’s teeth were perfectly white and straight while one of Jimin’s front teeth was slightly chipped. Jimin had a dimple; his mother had none. Their English soon turned to digs in Korean and I could no longer follow. A few words here and there but nothing substantial. James joined them.
“Hi,” Eloise shyly greeted me, obviously used to being left out of conversations.
“Hey,” I replied lamely. “Eloise?”
She nodded, “Cam and Harper are playing but you’ll meet them in a bit.”
I nodded along and cemented the names into memory. It would look bad if I forgot them and kids had an ability to remember the worst things about a person. I did not want them to dislike me this quickly. Their giggles and feet were still going, and I suspected they had their own rooms on top of the little playroom in the hall.
“What do you do for work?” I asked Eloise, hoping my attempts at small talk were going over well. The other three were still chatting and I stopped paying attention long enough to be completely lost. Their dialect was different from Namjoon’s family, and I gave up entirely once they switched in and out of it with ease.
“I’m taking over Audrey’s restaurant,” Eloise, it seemed, preferred to use their American names. I wondered if she called Jimin ‘Christian.’ I really did not like the name for him. Not at all. “We used to be co-owners but she’s preparing for…” Eloise’s eyebrows scrunched together as she struggled to come up with a way to voice her thoughts, “her next steps. You know what I mean?”
I nodded. It was so easy to forget why I was really here when Na-Yeon was so full of life. She laughed and joked easily, sang off-key in the car without a care in the world, and called the shots at home. I had hardly noticed any sickness, but I knew better. I already figured out she hated being cared for and our trip in the car could have taken a lot of her. More than I realized.
Wanting to change the subject, I asked about the kids. Eloise was more than happy to talk about her little ones. Cameron and Harper were twins, names that she had originally been very against but when she lost Tony (Haru preferred his American name, Anthony, and all of his closest friends called him Tony), her opinions changed. Harper was the bigger, older baby, while her brother needed to stay in the NICU for a few days after birth due to his weight. They were joined at the hip and rarely seen without the other, something Eloise was happy about given she was usually too busy to spend as much time with them as she would have liked.
“How old are they?” I asked.
“Almost 4.”
Jimin was 19 then. I shuddered to think about how old Haru was, or Eloise for that matter when they became parents. When I was their age, I had been at the top of my game, though not what I would call my prime. If I had gotten pregnant my career would not have been over, but meeting Joon never would have happened. That was a travesty regardless of how things turned out. Trying to picture a life without him touching it made me physically ill and so I pushed any of those thoughts away.
Cam and Harper came out of their room when dinner was ready. They were both very cute, loud, and dressed identically. Harper’s hair was braided down her back while Cam’s was in a bowl cut, and I laughed every time the little girl made a big show about her sparkly red shoes.
James made a very spicy fish stew. It was delicious, so salty and hot, but I needed multiple glasses of water as I ate. He used red snapper adding a sweet, nutty flavor to the otherwise savory dish and I loved the zucchini. Like many Korean meals there was an array of side dishes surrounding the large pot of stew. Tonight was braised potatoes, steamed eggplant, a radish salad, and, of course, kimchi. A small bowl of rice was given to all of us to eat the stew with and the rice cooker was filled if any of us wanted more.
The Parks were a lovely family. Jimin was quiet and did not talk to me much but his mother more than made up for his silence. After getting all of the details about my coaching job she moved on to my life back in Colorado. We talked about my friends and what they were like, my house, and even my neighbors. Na-Yeon seemed particularly interested in Hoseok since Jimin had been such a fan of his growing up.
“You need to get her over to Calvin and Violet’s,” James told his son, scraping up the last bit of the soup out of his bowl. “They’re expecting her soon.”
Jimin looked at me, eyebrow raised, “Are you ready?”
I nodded, “We can leave whenever you’re done.”
He smiled and went back to eating his meal. Eloise left before I did, Cam was tired and Harper was bored without her playmate, so she decided it was time they went home. Cam liked an afternoon nap still, but his sister could run all day if you let her. Harper gave me a big bear hug before she left, something Na-Yeon said she did to everyone, and held her brother’s hand on their way out.
Na-Yeon eventually got up from the table, James followed after her, leaving Jimin and I alone. I did not know what to say, if he wanted me to say anything at all. He had hardly spoken to me since I arrived, and it left me feeling out of place. I was here for him, and he wanted nothing to do with me. He kept eating, the spice unfazed him, and getting bowl after bowl of rice.
Watching him walk around I was struck by how short he was. Most male swimmers were huge, well over 6 feet, and broadly built. Not Jimin. He could not be any taller than 5’9” with a thin, tiny waist. I could see defined muscles hidden underneath his white t-shirt, but nothing spectacular. Even his body was soft and elegant, moving gracefully and quietly, and absolutely none of it would give away that he was a world-class athlete. As if he could feel my eyes following him, Jimin’s eyes snapped to meet my own.
“Sorry,” He pulled his spoon from his mouth. “I’m sure you’d like to leave and here I am gorging myself.”
I stopped him before he could stand, “No, no. I’m fine. I was just thinking about your workout routine.”
The lie felt heavy on my tongue, but I could hear how natural it sounded. He sat back down and took another bite of his food. His workout regime was standard for most swimmers. Pull-ups, bench, squat, lunge, power cleans, power cleans to overhead press. After that he was in the pool for a few hours before going about his day. He usually added in another swim at the end of the day, but he had recently given it up to have dinner with his family.
“What are you doing for your core?” I asked.
“I stick to pull ups, crunches, thrusts, and back extensions.”
I nodded, frowning, gears in my head turning. I have always believed the core was the most important part of swimming. Arms as well, but I have seen many overwork those muscles and lose from weak turns. Hoseok used to joke about my performance and how I only won because of my turns. I would make sure he would be able to see a little bit of me in Jimin’s swimming. There was a reason I won gold.
“You don’t look very impressed.”
I chuckled, “Just thinking. You need more variety than that.”
“Gym snob, are we?” His mouth stretched into a playful smirk, and I could not help but smile back. “You must be an animal in there.”
“I don’t work out like I used to,” I admitted, averting my eyes. “Most of my exercises are yoga and running now. I swim twice a week.”
I was hoping to get back in the pool more often, but I was not sure I was ready for the disappointment that would follow. My sessions with Emery were simple, exercise-focused, and had little to no expectations behind them. They were there to help me gain strength and confidence in myself. Saturdays were spent with Hoseok doing laps around the pool and shooting the shit. It was just enough to get your heart pumping but never went past that.
Failing was daunting. I could not remember a time before swimming consumed my life. My dad always said I was afraid of the water; it was the biggest reason he placed me in lessons. He did not have the time (nor patience) to teach me himself, and after I saw younger children getting into the pool I was determined to act like a “big girl.” I was only three at the time, so the memory was lost to time, but I went every week after that. It gave my dad a break and I had friends for the first time. I learned later that mom had left for a few months and dad was drinking again, but at the time all I knew was that I liked swimming, and I was good at it.
It was frightening to believe that all of the time, energy, and hard work went to waste. 30 seconds. That was all it took to destroy my life. 30 seconds and all of my joy, love, and happiness was gone. My career, my health, and my Joon. I hated the man who hit us. Hated the way his family cried for me. For him. For Joon. Squeeze my hands into fists, I was glad they were hidden underneath the table. Getting in the water and realizing it was truly over would only make that hatred worsen, and my therapist told me I needed to let go of my anger.
“Violet and Calvin are excited to meet you,” I did not know if Jimin could see something in his face, perhaps my eyes, but he changed the subject. The look on his face made me feel exposed. “We should get going.”
No one was around when I left so I did not get to say goodbye, but Jimin yelled that we were leaving. We did not get a response and I wondered if his mother had actually gone to do laundry or take a nap. She looked tired when she left the table. Jimin told me to get into the truck and laughed when I said I could grab my own bags.
“Your hip might give out, granny.”
Off guard, a strange, loud noise came out of my mouth. He had yet to start up our playful banter and my heart soared. Jimin was a very cheeky man, his tongue sharp, and with a quick snapback time, he was difficult to take down. Our text exchanges were always brief and about work, but he managed to squeeze in at least one teasing comment about my age. He said calling him ‘kiddo’ is what started the whole thing.
“Just get in the truck,” He sighed melodramatically, rolling his eyes.
Huffing, I went across the lawn and got into the unlocked truck on the curb. The interior was just as refurbished as the exterior. The bench was covered in a dark green vinyl, and I could tell the rubber carpet mats were new. It smelled much better in Jimin’s truck. Less like cigarettes and more like the cologne he wore. It was floral, powdery, but with a subtle spice that made it bitter-sweet. It had a nice scent. It suited a man like Jimin whose own spice was buried underneath his pretty visage.
Watching him jog across the yard, I suppressed a sigh. It was easier to ignore how pretty he was when we were around other people. Now it felt impossible. His clothes stuck to him like a second skin, the black leather pants (which I had only just noticed were leather) making his thighs bulge and accentuating his backside. He was gorgeous and I felt sorry that I would have to keep it to myself. Jimin deserved to be told things like that, but it was not my place to do so. Not as a coach, trainer, or otherwise.
He tossed my things into the cab of the truck as if they weighed nothing. Arms lifted; his shirt rose revealing a delicious patch of skin. Watching him in the rearview mirror, I swallowed audibly. A thin, almost nonexistent patch of hair touched his belly button. Forcing myself to look away, I took a few deep breaths.
This trip was going to be long. Very, very long.
The drive down the road was quiet. Jimin’s radio was out, and he needed to replace it, so music was not an option, and he did not seem to want to fill the space between us. Neither did I. My growing bashfulness around him was distracting and strange. I had always been surrounded by attractive men, all of my friends back home were very good looking, but none affected me in the same way Jimin had. Perhaps it was due to my relationship with Namjoon that made all of the other men pale in comparison, but I could never know for sure. Either way, it was incredibly frustrating.
We drove for less than ten minutes. Calvin and Violet were the elderly couple renting out the small house in their backyard. Jimin had spoken to them for me, and they were all too willing to help me out. Violet nearly cried when I told her I was going to pay all of my rent up front, and actually did when I told her that I would help her fix up some things around the house while I was in town. The Andersons seemed like lovely people, and I was happy to know them.
Pulling up to the house I smiled. It was exactly how I imagined it would be. The Anderson house was a simple, All-American home with a front porch. The window trimming was black, house white, and a beautiful garden wrapped around the front at either side. The roof and front door were the same color green as Jimin’s truck, and it helped the otherwise unnoteworthy home feel more inviting. Sitting on the porch swing was Violet, her silver hair braided down her shoulder.
“Before we get out,” Jimin mumbled, waving at Violet through my window. The old woman waved back, a large smile on her face making her look twenty years younger. “The Andersons are great people, but Calvin’s starting to forget stuff. Violet won’t admit it but it’s getting hard on her to deal with him. He can become very angry so keep an ear out. Last time he had an episode, Violet called my dad crying. She’s not handling it well.”
I frowned, my heart hurting, “Sure thing. I’ll let you know if anything happens.”
“Thanks.”
He was out of the car a few seconds later, voice so sweet and bubbly you would have never guessed what we had been talking about. Staring after him, my eyes squinted. I would have to keep my eye on him. Jimin was a great actor.
Getting out of the truck, I took out my bags and slung my duffle on my back. Jimin was quick to take my suitcase away once he caught me in the corner of his eye. Violet seemed positively giddy about it and made a few inappropriate comments about Jimin needing to settle down.
“I’m just saying,” She laughed when Jimin scoffed, face flushing the prettiest shade of pink. “You’re going to make a young woman very happy. Might as well get started.”
It was strange to think about my trainee seeing someone. He had made it very clear in his interviews over the years that his dating life was on hold until he was finished swimming. He did not want the added distraction and his family life was far too chaotic for him to focus on someone. This did not seem to deter Violet and her comments about his love life, or lack thereof, continued until we got inside of the house.
“Well,” Violet acknowledged me for the first time since I arrived, “This is the main house. It’s not much but it’ll work. Christian, take her stuff out back.”
I cringed. It really did not suit Jimin at all, but he seemed completely unfazed. Violet used his names interchangeably, sometimes calling him Jimin and other times Christian, but his English name rolled off her tongue more often than not. I wondered why she even bothered calling him Jimin at all. He did not seem to care either way.
Looking around the little house, I was pleasantly surprised by how clean it all was. The floors were carpeted and the walls a bright white, family photos hung up alongside landscape paintings. During my two-hour phone call with Violet, the woman talked my ear off, she bragged about Calvin’s art. I had to admit they were all very beautiful and I wanted to know where he had found all of the slices of heaven he captured. I hoped the places themselves were more colorful than he depicted. The muted washes of color made them blend in with the rest of the boring house even with how nice they were.
The furniture was just as boring as the house itself. All of it was cream or beige, nothing of importance really stuck out to me, and I was disappointed. All I could figure out about the couple was one was an artist and they had children and grandchildren they loved displaying. Even the smell of the house lacked character. No air freshener, no food, and no perfumes. Nothing to give away that people actually lived here. The Anderson home was a foil to the Park’s in every way.
“Come on out back,” Violet was already across the house, standing in front of a door beside the kitchen. “This is the utility room. You can do your laundry here.”
Following behind her, I felt even more depressed looking at her kitchen. It was nice, new appliances and a pretty coffee station on the corner closest to the utility room door, but it was bland. All white cabinets, white marble countertops, and stainless steel everything. Even the curtains hanging around the windows above the sink were dreadfully plain.
The utility room, like everything else, was plain. The washer and dryer were white, the floor concrete, and the shelving barebones. The detergent was the most colorful thing I saw since arriving. Somehow even this room smelled like absolutely nothing. Directly across from the door we entered was the backdoor and Violet told me where they would hide a key for me to be able to get inside.
“Ready to see it?” She asked, smiling politely.
I nodded, “Thanks again for renting it out to me.”
She chuckled, “No thanks needed. You were paying, that was enough for me to say yes.”
The back porch was tiny, just barely big enough for the both of us to stand on. There was a small vegetable garden along the side of the house, but it was empty. Noticing my wandering eyes, Violet told me all about the turnips and gourds she had been planting this season. She had watermelon and tomatoes in the summer, but they were long gone. The rest of the yard was taken up by my home for the next few months.
It was small, but that was to be expected. What disappointed me, though I should have not been very surprised, was how white it was. The windows were a dark gray, a small porch was set up with enough room for one of those hanging egg chairs, and two built-in planters. They were empty and Violet told me I was welcome to give gardening a chance if I was interested. She was planning on growing some flowers eventually, but she was not sure what she wanted.
The front door was open, Jimin already inside, and Violet and I went in. There was a small entryway, two doors leading to rooms I would explore later, and a small shoe rack. I took mine off and put them up. Violet watched me and took hers off as well.
“Audrey told me I should put one in here,” I was learning that Violet enjoyed meaningless small talk. “Glad I did. Don’t think Christian took his shoes off, though.”
I shrugged, “No biggie. I was going to clean up around here anyway.”
The house opened up to my right and I was happy with the space. I had a fully functional kitchen and enough space for my coffee cabinet along the wall. The living room would be able to fit a small loveseat, television, and coffee table. It was white and plain, but I was very happy with the floors. Whoever picked out the dark vinyl flooring must have had me in mind. I would go crazy if this place was as sterile as the Andersons’.
“I put your stuff in your room.”
Turning I grinned at Jimin. It was sweet of him to help me out. I was going to pick up my car tomorrow morning and he had volunteered to drive me. We would be starting our training next week so I could have some time to settle in. All of my furniture was arriving either tomorrow or the day after and my hands would be full. I was counting on Jimin and his friends to help me unpack. His manager was going to make himself known as well, but would not be staying for long. Apparently, according to Jimin, Sejin was not one to get his hands dirty.
“Thank you.”
“I’ll let you get settled in,” Violet was already scratching to leave, and I wondered why. She had been very hospitable over the phone. “You’re welcome to join us for dinner. Calvin is going to bring the air mattress out here tonight, so you have someplace to sleep.”
With a kiss on Jimin’s cheek, Violet slipped on her flats and left. Alone with Jimin again, I found it hard to speak. We were much better over text. Looking just as lost as I was, Jimin scratched the back of his neck and looked down.
“My, uh, my mom offered you her couch if you want it,” He stuttered, his face turning red. “Or, uh, um, you can take the spare room at my place,” He let out a huge gust of wind. “It’s a bit of a drive but I do have the space.”
Flustered, I quickly declined, “Thanks but I’ll be fine here.”
“Oh, yeah,” Jimin shook his head, the redness spreading down his neck. “For sure. Totally.”
The air was awkward now and I could not figure out how to fix it. Jimin was the one always breaking the ice between us, and now that he was acting like this I was stranded at sea. Even when he warned me he was more reserved in person I had not expected this. He was so quiet and skittish. How was I supposed to work with him if I could not get the courage to speak?
“Thanks for the offer,” I cleared my throat. “Are you staying for dinner?”
He shook his head, “I promised Jungkook we’d go out tonight. Any other time I’d say yes.”
I asked my disappointment. The thought of spending time with Violet and Calvin alone made me deeply uncomfortable. Their house felt like a hospital room and her weird behavior was unsettling. I could only hope Calvin was nicer but from what Jimin said he was a ticking time bomb. It would be nice to have someone act as a buffer.
“Why was she acting so strangely?” I asked, hoping Jimin had picked up on it as well. “It was like a totally different person.”
He frowned, “I think she’s just on edge since Calvin went to the doctor’s today. Their daughter took him, and she hasn’t heard anything. She’s a sweet woman, don’t worry.”
Now I felt like an asshole.
“That’s understandable,” I murmured. “Do you think she’ll be upset if I order food for all of us? If she’s stressed out, I don’t want her feeling like she has to cook for me.”
Jimin smiled, “She would appreciate it. I’ll go talk to her, how does that sound?”
I nodded, grateful. “That would be nice. The house gives me the creeps.”
That made him laugh, “What? Why?”
I shrugged, giggling with him.
“Feels like a funeral home or something. I hate the minimalist aesthetic.”
Jimin bit his lip, “You’d probably hate my place, too, then.”
I chuckled. It was easy to imagine Jimin inside of a huge modern house, dark wood and barely anything in it. He was a single man, busy, and spent so much time at his parent’s house it did not matter what he had inside of his own place. Not wanting to make him self conscious, I bit my tongue.
“I’m sure it’s not that bad.”
He cocked his head to the side, and I laughed.
“Fine,” I conceded. “I would probably dislike it, but I don’t think it looks like a white padded cell.”
I may have been exaggerating a bit, but it was not that far off from how the Anderson home looked to me. I hoped by asking me to help fix up a few things, Violet meant giving the house a much-needed makeover. If I was lucky, I might be able to convince her to get a few throw pillows to break up the monotony.
“Jeez,” Jimin laughed. “Harsh critic.”
“Well, is it?” I joked, glad to have found our footing again.
“No,” He shook his head in thought. “It’s mostly gray and black, but still just as empty. Probably emptier, honestly. I don’t have as many pictures as Violet does.”
Smirking, he snapped his fingers, “My trophy room is pretty colorful. I have a lot of pictures and shit in there.”
That made me smile. I was not bringing any of my memorabilia here, but it was nice to hear him sound so proud of himself. I kept most of my competition stuff in my basement, a large China cabinet displaying all of my awards. My favorite had to be the small, cheaply made trophy sat at the very top. It was beside my Olympic medals, worn and dull beside the beautiful necklaces, but I loved it all the same.
It was the first trophy I ever won. I was seven and my dad convinced me to sign up for a swimming competition my swim class was hosting. He promised to come. I practiced a lot preparing for it and made use of the new above ground pool my dad had bought. I won the race. My own joy and happiness made me forget that he never showed up until it was time to go home. I had to wait with my coach for two hours, and by the end of it she felt so bad for me she took me out for ice cream. Dad never apologized, I don’t even think he acknowledged that I won at all, and I never tried to bring it up again. Still, I loved that stupid thing. It was the reason I wanted to compete. That little pocket of happiness between winning and realizing that no one cared was precious to me and I held onto it.
“I need to get going,” Jimin sighed, reaching into his back pocket and snapping me out of my thoughts. “Jungkook’s blowing up my phone. Just got broken up with and needs a drinking buddy.”
I sucked in air through my teeth, “Well, your services are needed. Don’t let me hold you up.”
Jimin smiled at me, “See you tomorrow, yeah?”
I nodded, “See you.”
He lingered in the entryway for a moment more before shaking out of whatever trance he had been in. Slipping his converse back on, Jimin waved at me before walking outside. His face was buried in his phone, so he never saw me wave back. He shut the door, the sound echoing in the empty house, and I was once again left alone.
Violet came out a few minutes later to discuss take out until we finally landed on pizza. She never said thank you, but her offer to give the tip since I was paying was more than enough. Then later when a few of my boxes came in early she happily carried them to me. She even helped me put everything away. When Calvin came home, she led me back inside and said with so much affection it made my heart melt.
"Calvin, this is Y/N. Sweetest woman I ever did meet. Bought us dinner."
Calvin reminded me of Namjoon in a way. His soft eyes and gentle voice. He took my hand when I introduced myself, his hands cold and soft. Wrinkles and sunspots went up the length of his arms.
"It's a pleasure to meet you," He said.
"Likewise," I replied.
We ate in silence, the three of us watching Jeopardy on the sofa. Even though I had been nervous about eating inside, Calvin's presence warmed the place up. Once a prison now felt like a poorly decorated home. A home filled with love.
As I watched them together, Calvin reaching out for Violet's hand and her giving it to him without question, I felt myself getting choked up. There had been a time I had that. Joon would be on the floor, book in his lap, while my hands were in his hair as I studied my training tapes.
I left early that night. I blew up the mattress, the house quiet, before sending out a few texts to my friends to let them know I was getting on alright. After that, I put on nature sounds to help me drift off to sleep. I had not felt this lonely in a very long time.
Taglist: @ownthesunshine @screamertannie @lovelytaes-blog @pernesianparapio
© chimcess, 2024. Do not copy or repost without permission.
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Emerald Gem||Chapter Four
Chapter one|Chapter two|Chapter three|Chapter four|Chapter five|Chapter six|
Pairing: Hybrid!OT7 x fem!reader
Overview: Living away from society has its perks. All natural food from your thoroughly cultivated farm, no nosy neighbors, and peace and security with your animals. But sometimes you did get lonely, having no one the talk to but the pigs. However, when 7 extremely wanted hybrids stable upon your deserted farm, everything changes.
Genre: Hybrid Au, Strangers to lovers, slow burn, smut, fluff
Warnings: Suggestive themes, language, mentions of abuse and trauma
Word count: 1.4k
Unedited
Little hops make their way to your bedroom door. Your personal alarm clock. Slowly, the door opens and a ball of fur jumps on your bed, tapping your leg with its foot.
"a couple more minutes please", you groaned, flipping your pillow to the other side. The bunny huffed, tugging on the blanket. He continued to kick until you gave in.
"Fine, c'mere Koo..." his face beamed. As soon as you sat up, leaning against your wooden bed frame, Jungkook hopped in your lap and rolled over.
You happily gave him what he wanted, gently rubbing his belly and patting his head. "Are you gonna do this every morning?"
The bunny shook his head and put his paw on your hand, never wanting it to leave his fur.
"Alright, enough. I have to make breakfast", you said, scooping him up in your arms and heading downstairs. He blissfully laid his head in the crook of your neck, enjoying the ride.
Downstairs was quiet, a little too quiet. Usually, the guys always woke up before you, shifting into their animal form. However it seemed no one was here. "Kook, where is everyone?"
He shrugged. You put him down so he could take a look around, but something told you they weren't far. Then you heard a couple of coughs come from their bedroom. You knocked on the door lightly.
"Come in", you heard a hoarse voice say. The door slowly creeked open.
"Oh-"
Joon, Jin and Yoongi were laid on the bed, flat on their backs. Jimin and Tae sat uselessly on the couch and used tissue paper all over the floor.
"Hey, Y/n", Jimin smiled weakly. His voice was raspy, scratchy. The others looked pale, like they had just seen a ghost. Jimin however, was red as a tomato. He was burning up.
"You guys..." you pouted. "Why didn't you tell me you were sick?"
Jin tried to get up but the pack leader quickly eased him back in bed. "Didn't wanna bother you... it's nothing, really."
You walked around the room, picking the tissues up off the floor and into the trash. "This looks like something, Joon! When did it start?"
"...A couple days ago, maybe?"
"A couple days! You guys waited a couple days to tell me you were sick?"
Taehyung raised his hand. "Actually, we weren't gonna tell you at all but-"
"That doesn't make anything better, Tae", Someone said, sounded like Hobi.
"...Hoseok?" He wasn't on the bed and he wasn't on the couch...
After some searching you found him in the bathroom, laying on the cold floor tiles. He had a roll of toilet paper in one hand and a thermometer in the other.
"I'm alright", he promised. "Feeling better already. I was actually gonna-"
"No. I don't want to hear anymore", you shook your head, grabbing Hobi and helping him to the bed. It looked like a storm had hit their room. For a good minute, you stared, wondering why in the world they couldn't come to you. Maybe they weren't as comfortable as you thought. Maybe they still didn't trust you. They all falter under your gaze. They're not sure why but every time you stare at them with those eyes that light up the room, they falter.
You don't seem to notice it though.
"We're so sorry! We'll get better", Tae pleaded.
The packer leader vouched for him and the others. "It's my fault. I wasn't paying attention. I swear, we are really feeling better."
Now you're the one that doesn't feel well. You're the one feeling sick to your stomach. Not for the same reason they do, but because they easily sit and lie to your face.
You hate lying.
"How do you guys do that?"
"Do what?" They all tensed, in hopes of the worse. Everything was going well- at least you thought so. Can a little thing like this really mess everything up for them?
"How can you guys be in pain, physical and mental pain... and lie about it?" You were confused. You were fed up. You had questions, and needed answers. You just wanted to be trusted for once in your life. "You know what? Don't even answer that. I'll be back with some soup and hot tea. Don't move."
***
With anger, you cut the carrots. With hurt, you chopped the celery. And with love, you made the noodles, shaping each dumpling into a heart. Cooking was a big stress reliever for you. Luckily, you have seven more mouths to feed, They could keep you cooking for the rest of your life- if they decide to stay.
As you stir the pot, you think. It's what you're best at, besides cooking. Your mind moves a mile a minute. And right now, your mind was telling you somethings off. Something is wrong.
"Y/n?" Jungkook, now in his human form, shuffled behind you nervously.
"Yes? Are you not feeling well?" You put your hand to his forehead to see if he had a fever. He then moved your hand to his cheek instead, pushing his face into your palm for comfort.
"I'm sorry", he whispered. "For not telling you about the others. I didn't want to betray my pack. I t-tried go get them to tell you but they can be stubborn sometimes.
You sighed. "I know, and it's okay. Don't worry your pretty little head, okay?" You took your hand away, earning a whine from kook, and patted his head.
You filled six bowls with chicken noodle soup and brought it to their room, with the help of Jungkook. They scarfed down every last drop, leaving nothing in the bowl. Then you brought them each an herb tea with honey. One by one, you went around the room, checking their temperature and looking for anything serious.
"Okay, I'll be tending to the garden. Kook, they stay in bed at all times. Come get me if you need something." Jungkook shook his head, ready to complete any task you assign him. As soon as you left, the room was more relaxed, but a cloud still loomed over them.
"We messed up", Yoongi confessed. "She must feel like we don't trust her."
"We don't. We don't trust her." Joon's voice was stern, assertive. It made the others cower in fear- except the youngest. Jin hoped to settle the pack leader before the conversation turned sour.
"Namjoon, please don't start-"
"I don't trust her! You know what she might do to us knowing we're sick!" He tried to get up from the bed but Yoongi quickly laid him back down.
"She's not like that", Jungkook seethed. "If you just got the chance to know her, you would know that. You're too busy comparing her to the researchers to realize that she's nothing like them!"
"Kook, wait-"
"Jungkook is right", Jimin agreed. "It's never gonna get better than her. I... I want to stay."
Namjoon was practically fuming by now. "You want to what?" Jin took it upon himself to calm Him down, whispering sweet nothings. But the others had no intentions of stopping.
"Y/n has been nothing but sweet to us. I-I mean she is really just trying to understand and get to know us. Why can't you just do the same?"
It was a question that Namjoon didn't have the answer to. Why couldn't he just give in? Why couldn't he at least put in a little effort? He didn't know, but he just knew it couldn't happen...
"Everyone pack your things. We're leaving."
***
For dinner you made all of their favorites. In your family, it was a way to apologize, to make amends. For you, it was a way to start friendships-- and say sorry. You may have been a little harsh on them, but you couldn't help yourself.
"Dinner's ready!" You took your usual spot at the table and waited for the others to come. Once they sit down and eat, then you make your plate.
A few minutes had passed with you sitting at the table. No one left the room. Actually, the house was unusually quiet.
"Guys? The food is gonna get cold!" Maybe they're too weak to get out of bed, you thought.
You knocked on the bedroom door as to not invade their privacy. With no answer, you knocked one more time before opening the door.
"Oh, god-"
They were gone, vanished. It looked like they were never even there. After a while of staring at the empty room, your rumbling stomach told you to come back to the dinner table. Sitting in the dining room, eating Tae's favorite Mac &cheese, you pondered.
I'm alone, you thought. I'm all alone again...
-
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Taglist!!
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Bangtan Host Club Chapter Two
Genre: BTS Ot7xf!Reader, Poly!AU, Fluff, Romance, Crack-ish, Eventual Smut.
W/C: 3303
Summary: Tired of your boring mundane life? Become an exclusive member of The Bangtan Host Club™ today and let 7 charming men help you out.
Warnings: This chapter is rated PG13, but future chapters may include Mature Themes. The only real warning is Taekook being general menaces lol.
Disclaimer: Please do not copy/translate or cross-post my work. The tag list is open. Just DM or send an ask to be included.
A/N: Thank you for giving so much love to chapter one. I hope you all enjoy Chapter 2 as well! 💜 I am honestly really enjoying writing this too. Any and all feedback is greatly appreciated. See you soon with Chapter 3!! 🎀
Chapter 1 << Chapter 2 >> Chapter 3
Jungkook holds the door to the lobby of your apartment building open for you, smiling down at you impishly as you brush past him, thanking him coyly. Once everyone is indoors, Jimin is the first to speak.
“Wait, there must be a supply closet here. Namjoon Hyung, come with me. We should get the tools we need for this little project.” He shifts his stern gaze onto Taehyung and Jungkook as he directs them to keep you company up the stairwell. “Play nice, you two. We’ll be there in no time.”
Taehyung makes a face at this before shrugging. “We are always nice, isn’t that so Kookie?” he winks at Jungkook, who looks away from Taehyung… almost bashfully. Taehyung smiles in what seems like adoration before he turns to you. His smile turns a little playful as he nudges your shoulder with his. “Don’t you wanna take us to your place, pretty girl?”
Jimin audibly sighs before he shoots you a gentle smile. “Like I said, be there soon.” He waves at you and walks down the corridor toward the back of the building, Namjoon following behind him wordlessly. You gesture for Taehyung and Jungkook to follow you with a tilt of your head and turn toward the stairs leading up to your floor.
You trudge up the stairs first, followed closely by the two men. You’ve just about climbed five steps when suddenly you hear snickering behind you. You stop in your tracks and turn around, slightly agitated. Jungkook and Taehyung are close behind you, walking hand in hand. Jungkook stares up at you and blinks his eyes in curiosity. “Why’d you stop?”
“Nothing.” you mutter as you quickly glance away from them and look ahead at the concrete stairs like they have something important to tell you. Even though there are sounds of muffled giggles and murmurs of protest behind you, you keep your eyes straight ahead as you climb the stairs of the two floors. You walk up to your apartment door and slump your back against the hardwood.
Just as you turn around, Taehyung finds your eyes to rest his on. He takes one two three steps and he is standing right in front of you. He places his elbow behind you and leans into your space, his eyes trained on yours as he huffs out in amusement. “You are really pretty, you know…” his voice comes out deeper than before and his eyes fall to your lips, catching the way your tongue peeks out to wet them nervously.
“Thanks” you manage to say meekly under the intensity of his burning gaze which is instantly acknowledged by a deep hum from him. Then, you feel skin brush against your knuckles, and you look down to find Jungkook’s long tattooed fingers slotting against yours. You look up and you feel something in your chest flutter to find Jungkook and Taehyung looking at each other.
“Have you forgotten about me, Hyung?” Jungkook says, and his voice betrays a sense of hurt that is easy to catch. You have never seen a man resembling a kicked puppy like this before. Taehyung, to his credit, looks affronted by this accusation as he shifts his attention to Jungkook, a rueful smile plastered on his lips.
“Kookie, I couldn’t forget you if I tried.” he sighs deeply, shaking his head. Just as Jungkook breathes a sigh of relief, Taehyung continues, once again looking at you, “But she is just so beautiful, she is latching on to all my thoughts.”
Your eyebrows reflexively shoot up to your hairline at his declaration. You feel confused and yet somehow flattered and it only gets harder to articulate your emotions as Jungkook leans into you, resting his head on your shoulder as he solemnly speaks more to himself than anyone else at this point, “I really can’t argue with that.”
Your heart squeezes in your chest but the spell these two seem to place you under twice in the span of a mere hour is broken again by the sound of Jimin clearing his throat. You watch as the sullen expression on Taehyung’s face gives way to a playful pout as he childishly whines to you before pulling away from your space. “Sorry, pretty girl. The party has to be rescheduled.”
You feel more than hear what seems like a breath of a chuckle from Jungkook as he picks his head up from where it had been resting on your shoulder and moves a bit to his left, away from you. He crosses his arms over his chest and smirks at your shocked expression.
“Got the tools.” Jimin says calmly, choosing to completely ignore whatever was going on before he got here. Namjoon gives you a nod too as he approaches the door, holding a yellow toolbox that should be average-sized but looks comically small in his hands. He places it on the floor in front of you and tilts his head at your figure that is still pressed against your door.
It takes you a moment but you manage to compose yourself enough to understand what he means. “Oh yeah, sorry.” you grumble as you feel heat rush the back of your neck, only worsened when you see Jungkook snicker and poke Taehyung’s side, jerking his chin in your direction, definitely noticing your embarrassed state.
Namjoon gets to work on your Europa lock without another word, carefully twisting the metal with some pliers from the inside. Jimin, meanwhile, is regarding you with curiosity and you know he is trying to figure something out about you.
“Do you live alone on this floor?” Even though the question is directed at you, his gaze sweeps across the corridor where the door to another apartment is.
“No, I have a neighbor. An old lady. She is really sweet but she is away for a few days.” you answer easily, pointing in the direction he is looking at already.
“Hmm.” is all he has to add before looking at you again. You can tell Jimin is not being as pleasant to you as he was earlier. There is a sharpness in his eyes now as he regards you. You can’t help but feel intimidated by him and you don’t particularly enjoy his sudden coldness. You decide not to think about it too much and just chalk it up to him not being a big fan of wasting this much of his time helping a stranger he just met. What else could it possibly be?
“What do you do for work?” Jimin asks again, abruptly.
“I am a project manager at LinkSol.”
“LinkSol, as in LinkSol by Hwan Sana?”
“That’s the one. Have you worked there before?” you ask, trying to make this interaction between the two of you feel more conversational and less like an interrogation. However, Jimin tilts his head at you as if your question doesn’t make any sense to him. Even Jungkook snickers from where he has been observing the two of you.
“No, I have not worked at LinkSol. I have been an acquaintance of Ms. Sana for some time now, though.” Jimin explains with a shrug of his shoulders. You watch as his eyes take the liberty of regarding your entire figure. Then with a sudden jerk, his gaze jumps up to your face as if he has caught whatever it was he had been looking for and an amused smile forms on his lips. He is about to say something when his phone starts buzzing incessantly in his jeans pocket. He gives a sideways jerk of his neck as he pulls his phone out with a grin.
“Done.” Namjoon’s smooth voice announces as he pushes the door handle and opens the front door to your apartment.
Glee washes over you in waves as you rush into your apartment. God, you could just roll up into bed right now and have the deepest sleep of your life. Unfortunately, you are once again reminded of your unexpected guests and their kindness when Jimin’s voice breaks you out of your reverie.
“Jin Hyung is calling us all back.” he says and you hear someone, probably Taehyung, groan at the information. Then Jimin’s head peeks around the door of your apartment and he gives you a dazzling smile. “You too. He said something about you forgetting your coat. He seems really forlorn from the sounds of it.”
“Let me get my keys this time.” you say as you walk towards your TV console and pocket the keys, coming back out the door and closing it behind you. Namjoon looks at you with a small shy smile, his dimples making an appearance and you are cruelly reminded of how you never even thanked him.
“Thank you guys so much. I am so grateful to all of you.” You bite your lip shyly as you look at the four beautiful men standing outside your humble apartment. Namjoon looks down at his feet, and Jimin waves a hand in the air to dismiss the whole thing.
“No need to thank us, yet. Let us take you back and you can finish all those cookies you ordered from Hobi Hyung.” He places his hand on your back to guide you back down the stairs. There is a sense of excitement in his actions that does not go amiss by you. Just moments ago it felt like he was scrutinizing you and yet now it feels like he is overjoyed at the idea of taking you back to the cafe and as you walk down the familiar staircase for the second time that evening, you wonder what it is that he seems to have gathered from you.
When you reach the cafe again, it seems livelier. There are other customers inside, ordering drinks and engaging in conversations at various tables in small groups. In fact, as you slowly realize, it seems like the tables are set up in a way that one of the employees are at the center, addressing and chatting with multiple customers at a time. Jimin takes your hand and guides you over to the table where Seokjin is surrounded by about eight people. His eyes meet yours as you take the chair pulled back by Jimin and he gives you a dashing smile. “I thought you’d forgotten all about me, princess.” he coos and you feel the familiar flutter of your heart in your chest.
“Her jacket is what she forgot, I heard.” Jungkook sing-songs as he brushes past you toward the table beside yours, where Taehyung is already seated, surrounded by some people and chatting with them, all smirks and winks.
Seokjin scowls at Jungkook momentarily before regaining his composure and smiling at the table again. “Either way, it does not matter, for you have found your way back to me again and I couldn’t be happier.” he punctuates the end of his sentence with a flying kiss directed at you. The other people at the table sigh longingly at him.
Okay. This whole thing is starting to feel a bit off to you. That’s an awfully romantic thing to say to someone you just know the name of, right? Someone you just met no longer than an hour ago? And what’s with the swooning? Sure, Seokjin is really handsome and charming, but to hang on to all of his words with such reverence? Maybe you are just too tired to understand all of this. Deciding that you should take yourself back home and sleep the weariness off, you stand up from the table, ready to go.
“Thank you guys for everything. I would like to go home now, um, where can I find my coat again?” you ask Seokjin who looks brazenly offended like you’d hurt his pride but, nonetheless, points to a door beside the entrance of the cafe. “Right there, angel.”
You nod and hightail it away from the table. Your eyes meet the cute barista from earlier who waves at you enthusiastically. You feel fondness churn your heart and you wave back at him. You twist the door handle to the coat closet and smack your head right against a person, knocking them and yourself off balance. The sudden inertia brings out a yelp from you. You feel strong arms snaking around your waist and holding you against the chest of the person who has acted as a cushion against your fall. They let out a muffled groan from under you when they fall on their ass, their arms still holding you safely.
“Oh my god, I am so sorry.” You say and try to get up from your place on the floor far too quickly but your arms are entangled with the person below you, making you slump right back on top of them.
“Patience.” says a deep voice from below you. The arms loosen from their previous position around your waist and instead, hands press against your sides, gently pushing you upward. You press your knees against the hardwood floor as you push your hands against the sides of their shoulders. How dark it is in here is not helping you in any way either. Once sufficiently distanced from the person below you, you look up to find a pair of beautiful, sharp, feline-like eyes staring at you. Even though it is dark you can make out the silhouette of a black mask covering the lower half of their face.
“Are you okay?” a man’s voice asks you and you pull back further now sitting on your knees as you rub along your left elbow, only out of nerves.
“I am fine. Are you?!” you ask, your voice pitching with concern. You would be so embarrassed if this person injured themselves while saving you from falling because you were too busy gawking at the barista. You will never show your face at this establishment again.
“Probably nothing too bad.” he says nonchalantly as he sits up as well. “Yoongi.” he extends his hand to you, “And you?”
You take his hand in yours to shake and give him your name. Slowly, the two of you stand up again and try to find your bearings in the dark. As your eyes slowly adjust to the dark further, you notice that Yoongi is wearing some sort of large coat that is shaped more like a cloak. “Wait,” he says and presses the button behind you on the wall, turning the lights on.
You squint your eyes from the sudden burst of light and catch a flash of pale skin as Yoongi quickly puts his hands inside the pockets of his coat-cloak. You notice he is wearing an entirely black ensemble, with a black mask over his mouth and a black hood pulled over his head. He regards you with the same feline-like eyes that you had been able to catch the intensity of even in the dark.
“People do not usually come in here.” he says with a questioning furrow of his brows.
Before you can answer him the door is pushed open again and Hoseok is clinging to your back.
“I heard a loud thud! Are you both okay?! I got so worried!” he spits out the words rapidly, concern evident in his slightly trembling voice.
“We’re fine, Hoba.” Yoongi answers for both of you and you feel Hoseok rubbing his head into your shoulder as he nods. Gently, he lets go of you and steps back.
“That’s good.” he chirps up the next moment and links his pinky with yours. “What are you doing here anyway?”
“Seokjin told me I can find my coat here, I was just leaving.” you tell him and remind yourself.
This seems to sour Hoseok’s mood. He pouts at you adorably. Seriously, how can a grown man be this precious?
“We haven’t even played together!” he whines and bats his eyelashes at you. You feel a compelling urge to coo at him but you choose to suppress it. Instead, you put your hand in his soft blonde hair and ruffle them slightly.
“I am sorry. I kinda just wanna go home and sleep. It has been a long day.” You say and spot your coat neatly hung from a coat rack behind Yoongi. You take the coat off the rack and wear it snugly.
“Aw, you didn’t even enjoy the sweets with me. I would have loved to eat them with you.” Hoseok pouts even more and adds a small sniffle that you immediately recognize as an act of dramatic effect.
“Is it only the sweets you want me for?” you playfully chide him. His adorable pout gives way to a mischievous grin as he giggles and hugs himself to you again, hiding his face on your shoulder.
“You caught me!” he says with a flurry of laughter. Then he pulls away from you as his giggles die down slowly. “I understand you have to go. It makes me sad, though, and not just because of the sweets-related missed opportunity.” he punctuates his words with a gentle nudge of your shoulder.
You jut out your lower lip at him in adoration, imitating his pout from before. “Maybe we will see each other soon! We can surely hang out then, right?”
Hoseok’s smile vanishes for a moment as his eyes scan your face in confusion. Slowly then all at once, his eyes soften in realization, and an even bigger grin forms on his lips. “You are adorable!” he giggles but the joke is lost on you. You still find yourself giggling simply because he is giggling.
Hoseok starts to lead you out of the room with his pinky which is still linked with yours. You hear shuffling of feet behind you and you turn your head slightly to see Yoongi is also following the both of you out, his eyes concentrated on the floor.
Once you reach the counter, Hoseok lets go of your pinky and goes to his rightful place behind it. “How much do I owe you for today?” you ask him, pulling out your wallet from your coat.
He is leaning his palms forward on the counter as he types on the computer in front of him. The card machine starts generating a receipt for you. He tears it and hands you one-half of the receipt. You take the receipt and- huh?
This can NOT be right. That’s way too many zeroes. That’s at least three more zeroes than your entire net worth.
“You made a mistake.” you chuckle nervously as you try to hand the receipt back to Hoseok with wide eyes. He looks at you, presses his lips together, and shakes his head.
“I never make an error. It is absolutely right. You have availed special services of the club today. Multiple hosts left their positions to provide you with a service, even accompanying you to your front door, to be exact. Those are the right charges.” he explains in a cheery yet calm voice that feels anything but reassuring right now.
Hosts? Did he just say hosts? The people who are paid for their company? Then it dawns on you. Bangtan Host Club™. You look around to see how blatantly the name is displayed on the menu cards and the flipbooks on the tables. How several customers are wearing merchandise that reflects the same name. Why had you been so ignorant? Were you so distracted by their charms that you did not even realize what exactly was going on? It is a fucking trademark for God’s sake! How on earth did you miss it?! You feel bile rush up your throat as you look down on the receipt again and the series of zeroes makes you slightly dizzy.
The next words you screech out come from deep within your bones- “WHAT THE FUCK!”
Taglist: @im-sinking-in-mud @comingupwithacoolnameishard @loumin908
#!bhc#bangtan x reader#bts crack#bts fluff#bts fanfic#bts ot7#bts poly au#bts poly x reader#bts romance#bangtan#bts smut#bts x reader#bts x fem!reader#bts x you#bts x y/n#kim namjoon#kim seokjin#min yoongi#jung hoseok#park jimin#kim taehyung#jeon jungkook#ot7 x reader#ot7#bts series
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Could you write an ot7 x reader fic where the reader feels they arent good enough because they're not particularly skinny but not fat and feels they're not that talented compared to the boys? Pretty angsty but some fluff? ❤
God. You sigh inwardly looking at your body for the millionth time in the standing mirror of your bedroom, jeans unbuttoned wide, mocking. The perspiration on your brow from exertion tells the rest of the story.
You had gained weight. Again. As if it wasn't hard enough to be the girlfriend of the seven most talented men on the earth, all muscle and grace. The picture of masculine beauty, and you, textbook mediocrity.
You kick the pants off in anger, hot tears stinging your eyes as you flop back onto your bed. You are going to be late for work. You scolded yourself. Fuck work. You snapped back like the world would come to a screeching halt if one cashier at Francine's was 15 minutes late.
What happened to the diet? Your inner critic asks, voice dripping in bitter sarcasm. They work so hard and you can't even look good for them? People would laugh if they saw you together.
Your phone buzzes, bringing you temporarily out of your shame spiral. You wipe away your now-flowing tears to see the message light up your screen.
Jiminnie ❤️: Good morning everyone ꜀( ˊ̠˂˃ˋ̠ )꜆
You smile somewhat bittersweetly to yourself. Jimin, always the first one up, always the first to tell everyone good morning. You recall, briefly, the day when Tae beat him to the punch and how he pouted the whole day.
Y/N: Morning chim~ Have an amazing day today! ❤️
Jiminnie ❤️: You too!!
Have an amazing day. Well, you could certainly try. You pick yourself off your bed and select a frumpy sweater and a baggy pair of jeans. It was cold, anyway, you told yourself disguising your plummeting self-esteem in faux practicality. You studied your face in the mirror, plain, if not a little pretty, but certainly not superstar-worthy. You swipe on some waterproof mascara and don your sneakers before the self-criticism has a chance to sink in.
Work was awful. You were so swept off your feet with customers, that you had barely had time to glance at your phone in between getting screamed at for not carrying certain sizes or being out of stock. You had slipped to the stock room more than once to put your waterproof mascara to the test. Last double I ever work. You say to yourself, shutting the lights, arming the security, and slipping out the back.
The autumnal night air had a wintery bite to it, you regret not bringing a jacket. It is only now that you have the chance to read your phone, slightly wincing at the piled notifications from the day. Most recently, you read:
Yoongi 😻: Finished working with Namjoon a little while ago. You must be done soon too. It’s cold, so I am going to come and pick you up. Did you eat?
Y/N: How presumptuous, Mr. Min~
Your tone is sardonic, but really, you're glad for the ride as a chill begins seeping into your bones. Before long, you see his black sports car pull up and you waste no time jumping in the front. You had done this routine before.
“Hi,” Yongi says, looking you up and down before leaning in for a kiss.
“Hi,” you say back, giving him a quick peck on the lips.
“What? Is that all I get?” He quips in faux hurt. “Oh did you want to make out right now, leave Namjoon to drive?” You tease back before turning to face the man in the back seat. “Hi,” You greet him as well, offering him your hand.
“Don’t let me stop you” Namjoon says with a chuckle, “I just didn’t know you were looking to die today.” He then picks up your hand, placing a gentle kiss on the knuckle. “Hi, baby.” He said with his signature, dimpled smile. The sight of which clenches your heart, the words from your shame spiral this morning coming back full force. You don’t deserve this.
“Where am I dropping you off?” Yoongi asked. “Did you eat? We could get dinner.”
“My place, please. I had a big lunch and I think I’m just going to reheat some leftovers for dinner. You guys go ahead.” You lie, but you were in no mood to be eating food in front of them.
Yoongi looked at you, piercingly as he always does. Just when you think he’s going to call you on your lie,
“Alright.” He says, before putting the car in gear. Your apartment is only 10 minutes away, but Yoongi goes the long way letting you rant about stupid customers and annoying managers. By the time he pulls up, you feel better and you realize, he knew you needed that. A lump forms in your throat at the notion. You offer the pair a kiss, before sliding out of the car as quick as you can go, lest you start crying again. Yoongi waits until you’re inside, safe before pulling off. He always does. You don’t deserve him. You don’t deserve them.
Dinner is another mental warzone as you peruse your kitchen, biting commentary from two halves of your inner voice. After what happened this morning you don’t deserve to eat. The boys wouldn’t want me to starve. You’d be so much prettier if you were skinny. Starving isn’t a good way of weight loss anyway. The mental back and forth is exhausting, so you settle on a sandwich and settle on the couch.
TaeTae: You wanna ft? I miss youuuuuu why didn’t you come over today???
The message lights up your phone. You respond by calling him. He picks up right away.
“Y/N!” He exclaims. Even disheveled, he looks amazing. After catching up on the group chat, you learned that the maknae line had the day off and had a “staycation” as they put it while the hyungs were busy away.
“Hi Tae” You giggle back at his enthusiasm. It was infectious, it always was.
“Why didn’t you come over today?? We missed you!” He pouts.
“I am tired, Tae. And I have work early tomorrow and the following day. All doubles.”
“Jeez. I swear you work harder than us!”
You could laugh at the insinuation. They were multinational artists, constantly writing music, performing, dancing, recording music, recording content, and you folded clothes and got screamed at by people 10x richer than you for 12 hours a day. You would hardly call that working harder. You keep the thought to yourself.
“EY YO.” You hear Jungkook's unmistakable voice shout in the background. “IS THAT Y/N?”
“Yes, but I’m talking to her!” Tae says ripping the phone away from his dongsaeng as he flopps down on the couch next to him.
“Hey, I wanna talk too!” He says, yanking the older boy’s arm back so the two of them come into view.
“Hi, kookie.” You say, giving him a small wave.
“Y/N! I’ve been locked in the house all day with these schmucks, can you believe that?” Jungkook says, exasperated.
“Hey!” Tae shouts, offended. “You weren’t complaining about being locked in when me and Jimin brought you pancakes in bed. Or when we did face masks and painted our nails!”
“Yeah, we did our nails, look!” Jungkook says, ignoring the rest of Taehyung’s remarks. On Jungkook's hand, he has nicely painted black nails, on Taehyung a well-manicured clear coat.
“You did an amazing job!” You say giving them a small round of applause.
“We miss you.” The youngest says after a few beats of silence. The sincerity pulls at your heart.
“It's only been a week.” You say sticking your tongue out. “I miss you all too.” That at least was the whole truth.
“Well you’re busy and we’re busy…” Taehyung trailed off. You understood what he was getting at. No matter what you felt for them, there was always going to be miles of difference between you and them. Different leagues, solar systems.
“But don’t be busy this weekend! Saturday~” Jungkook reminds you AGAIN. The boys had been teasing you for weeks about this surprise. You couldn’t forget if you wanted to.
“I have to go to bed.” You half whine, stretching.
“GOOD NIGHT WE LOVE YOU SLEEP WELL” They yell at you in half unison before hanging up.
“I love you too.” You say to no one, before getting up and going to bed.
And so the days passed like that, days rushed off your feet, nights full of loud face times, and spare thoughts dedicated to your inadequacy. Pushing every single worry, every bitter thought down, lest you worry them with your stupid problems. They had plenty on their plate. You were so boring, untalented, plain. They shown brighter than the sun, thousands of beautiful, perfect successful girls would kill to be you. Should be you. You lucked into this position. Just because you were in the right place at the right time. Just because Jin was so friendly. You tricked him. He just introduced you to everyone else because he pitied you. They just pity you. You can’t even be happy around them. You can’t even be fun for them. What do you provide them? It was suffocating. They deserve better. They deserve better. They deserve better.
Friday night you walk home, music blasting through your earbuds, tears running down your face. It was the wind, you say to no one, bitterly wiping them on your sleeve. You finally understood what you had to do. Saturday, when you met up, you’d thank them for everything, and let them find someone worthy. For their own sake. You wouldn’t let them waste any more time on you.
Sleep was fitful and tear-stained that night, the night soon passed, and Saturday morning came.
The group chat through the day was uncharacteristically silent, save for Jimin’s obligatory good morning text. Fuck, you were going to miss that.
In terms of the plans tonight, you had been given instructions to show up at a certain place by 5 pm. Even when inquiring about what you should wear was vague, anything you felt like. You felt like crawling into a ball of self-pity and hiding under the sheets, but still, you pulled yourself together enough to ready yourself for anything. Pulling the place up on Google Maps revealed it to be a warehouse of sorts. Weird. You thought, clipping your earrings in and pulling your shoes on as the Uber blared its horn obnoxiously outside.
You went for something practical, but cute. Tennis skirt with thigh-high socks, a button-down blouse to match, and a puffer jacket. Makeup was light, and minimal. Cry proof, you were going to break up with 7 men you had come to love after all. It was for their own good. You reminded yourself.
The ride itself was as blissfully silent as an Uber ride can be, and not long. Outside of general city limits, there was marginally less attention and fewer chances of a slip-up. Being seen with you was the last thing they could afford.
The Uber pulled away leaving you in front of a large, white warehouse. This was some kind of industrial complex, you noted. Double checking the warehouse number with the number JK had sent to you 2 weeks prior. This was the place.
A feeling of unsettlement crossed your mind now, in the time you had known these men they had never once given you pause to worry, let alone make you feel unsafe. And yet, here you were, alone in a line of massive, empty warehouses. A bit of fear began to prickle under your skin and your scalp. They wouldn’t hurt you, right? Hell, maybe this is the merciful way out. A dark side of you thought.
Without wasting any more time, you stepped forward opening the door and stepping into total blackness.
The temperature was fine, temperate even. The scent of woodland, peat moss, and petrichor was thick in the air. Seconds in the dark felt like hours, panic sets in and you take a step backward, feeling for the door. Before you can grasp the handle, the lights come on all at once, and several voices shout HAPPY ANNIVERSARY at you.
You visibly jump, startled, but then audibly gasp at the scene before you. The warehouse had been decorated, floor to ceiling to resemble an enchanted forest. Large trees stood relatively tall in the vaulted ceiling of the space, their gnarled limbs covered in deep green vegetation, moss hanging from them like beards. Lights and glass baubles hung too, their glittering looking like forest spirits in suspended animation. Impossibly, from somewhere high and unseeable, light streamed down through the tree tops, golden and warm as the real sun. The floor seemed to be made of real, deep green moss that squished slightly under your feet. You noticed that there seemed to be several large stones forming stepping stone paths through the moss and into the fake woods. Feint music and animal chatter could be heard too, bringing the space to life. In front of you sits a large, stone arch, twisted with vines and seemingly weathered with time, though which was a clearing, where sat 7 of the most beautiful men you had seen in your life at a long, beautifully decorated, rich dark wood table.
The boys had dressed themselves in complete congruence with the environment. They each wore long hair of varying lengths some shoulder length, some to the waist, but all done up in a manner of braids, flowers, and gems. Each wore a manner of robes and belts of several different colors, draped and tied perfectly to emphasize their physique. It hits you at once what this all is, and nothing could stop the torrent of tears that spring forth as a result.
“Oh! Wait, those seem like upset tears!” Jin is the first up and rushing over to you. “We were hoping for happy tears not upset tears!”
“God damn it you guys I told you so many times we should say something and that we were going to scare the shit out of her on accident!” Namjoon said in a huff, standing up and making his way over to you. The rest follow behind, all echoing cheer-ups and apologies alike.
You sob openly now into your hands, and even with all 7 of the men you have grown to love surrounding you, you lock your abs and you don’t allow one to pull you into a comforting embrace. Jin is the first to speak again.
“Y/N, what has gotten into you? We just wanted to do something nice and memorable for our 1st anniversary together.” Jin said with a level of love, concern, and sincerity that something in you finally snapped.
“Why. Are. You. Being. So. Fucking. Nice. To. Me.” You ask, demand in between heaving sobs.
“Because we love you!” Jungkook answers first, and everyone answers in the affirmative.
“I. Am. Fucking. Worthless.” You sob again.
“Don’t say that!” Jimin says this time, trying to grab you, hold you. You resist him again.
“First I am so up my own ass I can’t be bothered to remember that it's our anniversary, and you guys go and do something so nice, so beautiful for me. I can’t give you anything. All I do is take. You are all so perfect and beautiful and talented and I am just a plain worthless girl, working a dead-end job, with a shitty flabby body and plain face who tricked you guys into caring for me. I drag you down. We live in different worlds and I am tired of watching you all pretending I’m worth anything more than a cheap fuck.” The words fall out in a blubbering mess, a stream of words, feelings, and sentiments bursting forth after being pent up for a year. You can’t bring yourself to look at anyone in particular, so you study the floor.
“Enough.” The voice rings out so sternly it stops your torrent almost in its place. You look up as Hoseok, who had been standing behind everyone else, pushes his way to the front, standing directly in front of you. His face, normally the definition of sunshine and joy, only held fury.
“First of all.” He began, clipped and stern. “That dead-end job keeps you so busy you hardly have time to eat and shower, so you’d be forgiven for forgetting.”
“But- You begin before Hoseok cuts you off.
“I am not finished. Second, I’m grateful for that dead-end job because it lead us to you. If you hadn’t been working at that boutique, Jin-hyung would never have met you, and I wouldn’t have ever met you in return. Lastly,” He begins, stepping forward another step, holding your face in between his thumb and forefinger, forcing you to make eye contact with him. “You can talk shit about anyone you’d like, but you are not ever to speak that way about anyone I love. Not to me, not to any of them. And further, you are not ever, and I do mean ever, to tell me who I am and am not permitted to love.”
At this angle, you search his face, and you find anger, so much anger, but more so you find hurt and love and honesty. Tears well again in your eyes, but this time when Hoseok pulls you into his arms, you don’t resist him. One by one, everyone piles into what is, ostensibly, the cheesiest group hug ever, but you can’t find it in you to care. You cry again for what seems like ages, breathing in the mixing scent of them and allowing yourself, finally, to let them love you.
After your crying stills, you break apart and survey the group, more carefully this time. They had even themed their outfits around it.
“My dream.” you sniffle and gesture to them, then the set behind them. “Our first group date, I told you about a dream I had as a little girl. The enchanted forest and its 7 protectors. You even dressed up as them.” You say in a half laugh. “The dragon,” you said gesturing to Namjoon, “Gumiho,” You say pointing to Jimin, “Hydra,” You say pointing to Yoongi, “Fae King, Werewolf, Griffin, and Phoenix,” You say, pointing to Jin, Jungkook, Hoseok, and Jimin respectively.
“The very same,” Yoongi says with a bow.
“Wow…” You say, breathless. A silence falls on the group before you speak up once again. “I am… sorry.” You start.
“Don’t be!” Various maknae line members clamor to interrupt you.
“Let her finish,” Namjoon says sternly.
“I have been feeling this way for a long time. I think it's been building up from the beginning, actually. I have always felt like you guys were all a billion times more attractive than me, and I started to feel like on top of that, I was talentless and useless in comparison. I never wanted to burden you with my insecure ramblings so I kept them buried and I guess they ate me alive a little. A lot. Truthfully I came here ready to break up with you.”
“What?!” The group of voices collectively reacts.
“No I mean I didn’t want to but I felt super useless and ugly so I thought you were just wasting your time with me I mean I love you all so much and I feel so grateful and lucky to have you but it was for your own good that you found someone else-” You begin spouting off.
Jin takes your hand, interrupting your stream of consciousness “I thought we’d exchange the sweet stuff at dinner but there is no greater time than now. I consider meeting you to be one of the luckiest days of my life. And I know I can speak for everyone and say this past year, you have brought so much joy and intrigue and fun into our lives and we wouldn’t give you up for anything or anyone.”
“Besides.” Yoongi grabs your other hand, giving it a light kiss. “You are a terrible liar. I could see you were suffering from something inside. I know what that's like.”
“AND” Jungkook adds loudly “NOT THAT IT IS ABOUT THIS” he begins loudly, “AND WE VALUE Y/N THE MOST FOR HER KINDNESS, HER CONSIDERATION, HER WORK ETHIC, HER SPUNK-”
“Get to the point.” The group says collectively.
“Y/N to me, to us, you are a work of art. You can’t see yourself the way we do. Your face belongs in a Monet, your body is as if it was sculpted by Michaelangelo himself. Even the little things you do, the way you tie up your hair when you are trying to concentrate when you throw your head back and laugh when something is really funny, when you pace around the apartment when you're on the phone, you are beautiful”
“Aw, kookie…” You clasp your hand around your mouth, before wrapping your arms around him.
“God please no more tears,” Taehyung says, desperately.
You laugh, letting go of Jungkook. “Tae, I don’t think I have any left in my body.”
“Listen, everyone, I can’t promise you this discussion is going to make the voice telling me I’m inadequate to go away. But what I can promise is that I will talk about them. I won’t let them build up so bad.”
“That’s all we would ask of you,” Namjoon says in return. “Besides I’m kind of worried who the hell we’ve been dating this last year if you think we are perfect!”
“Without getting personal,” Jimin pipes in “We are all at least a group of barely functional, workaholic perfectionists who don’t eat enough, don’t sleep enough, and who care far too much what the public thinks of us. And that's just what applies to all of us, forget our individual faults.”
“True…” You concede. “Is it still too late to enjoy whatever this is?” You ask, gesturing toward the table.
“No not at all!” They all scramble away, leading you to the table. You immediately notice that apparently, a meltdown was not in the card for the evening, as lit candelabras were now dripping hot wax onto the table runner. Various foods dotted the table, sat in warming dishes to ensure they didn’t get cold while they waited. It was a variable fragrant smorgasbord, and you were starving.
“I feel a little underdressed…” You admit, looking at them and then at your outfit. “You guys could have at least told me the dress code.” You said, teasing.
“OH SHIT RIGHT.” Jungkook jumps forward, bowing deeply and putting on a commanding tone. “Fae king, get the lady her vestments at once!”
Jin rolls his eyes at the younger’s commanding tone, but reaches under the table and pulls out a large, white box. From which he pulls out a deep green dress with several accessories and piles them into your hands. “If the lady would be so kind to change over there.” He said, gesturing to a tasteful rice paper screen that stood about 30 feet to the side of the table.
“She would.” You say, giving a little curtsey, walking off to change. The dress was form-fitting but in all the best ways. What you didn’t notice before, was that the dress was heavy, dotted with crystals made to look like you were covered in the morning summer dew. Over your shoulders sat a long cape made of leaves, arranged in the gradient from green, to yellow, to orange, to red, to brown. Atop your head, a crown of wildflowers and fruit tree blossoms, and a scepter for you to carry, clear crystalline in its structure, topped by a frosted glass orb from inside which, a dull blue light shown.
“It’s clearly season-themed…” You begin as you step from behind the screen. “But why?” You ask, taking in their expressions.
Your heart rate quickens and you feel the heat rise to your face as the group goes silent, somewhat slack-jawed. Some wear expressions of hunger, and desire, others of pure awe and love, but no doubt you hold all their attention.
“What?!” You ask demandingly, embarrassed.
“You look…” Jimin starts
“Perfect.” Yoongi finishes.
“Thank you” You offer, voice unsure. You somewhat walk over to them feeling awkward, but flattered.
“Queen of the forest.” Taehyung offers.
“Huh?”
“Queen of the forest.” He repeats. “That’s what your dream was missing. We protect the forest, but we still needed a queen.”
The depth of the metaphor forms a lump in your throat. You clear it before speaking. “Well, it’s beautiful. This is all so beautiful. Thank you, I cannot express my gratitude enough.”
“Thank you. For being here. For being you. You are everything we need you to be.” Jimin said with a sweet smile. “Shall we eat?”
And with that, the evening dinner festivities take off. The lot of you spend the evening drinking too much wine and sharing your favorite stories from the year together. At the end of the night, you go back to their place where you can all snuggle in Namjoon’s massive bed, and as the wine takes you to sleep, it occurs to you that maybe, you are right where you are supposed to be.
A/N: Hope you enjoyed the request it only took me 4 years, 9 months, and 18 days to complete
#bts#bangtan#bts x reader#bts x you#bts x y/n#bts x fem!reader#ot7xreader#ot7 x reader#namjoon x reader#jin x reader#yoongi x reader#suga x reader#seokjin x reader#hoseok x reader#jhope x reader#jimin x reader#taehyun x reader#jungkook x reader#fluff#bts fluff#bts x reader fluff#yeojarequest#oneshot
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༄BTS X f.Reader | Ongoing (Very slow updates) | ༄Fantasy, Mermaid AU
"Let the waters guide you... just as Selene guides them..."
"You've been away long enough... It's time to come home.."
All Y/n wanted out of her dull, mundane life was to find out the truth about herself. Will she succeed in her endeavours or end up diving into something way deeper than anticipated? Only time will tell and perhaps from the reluctant help of a certain scaled individual.
*Forewarning, the appearance of BTS in the story will not occur immediately. Certain aspects of the plot need to be established and built up before the boys can appear. Expect one or multiple interactions with them in later chapters. Sorry and thank you for your patience.
Cross posted from my Wattpad ©2022 - 2024 shyminmin / ZephyrCat9
⋆ 𝐓𝐢𝐝𝐚𝐥 𝐆𝐚𝐥𝐥𝐞𝐫𝐲 ༄⋆
𝐏𝐫𝐨𝐥𝐨𝐠𝐮𝐞 𝐂𝐡𝐚𝐩𝐭𝐞𝐫 𝟏 𝐂𝐡𝐚𝐩𝐭𝐞𝐫 𝟐 𝐂𝐡𝐚𝐩𝐭𝐞𝐫 𝟑 𝐂𝐡𝐚𝐩𝐭𝐞𝐫 𝟒 𝐂𝐡𝐚𝐩𝐭𝐞𝐫 𝟓 𝐂𝐡𝐚𝐩𝐭𝐞𝐫 𝟔 𝐂𝐡𝐚𝐩𝐭𝐞𝐫 𝟕 𝐂𝐡𝐚𝐩𝐭𝐞𝐫 𝟖 𝐂𝐡𝐚𝐩𝐭𝐞𝐫 𝟗 𝐂𝐡𝐚𝐩𝐭𝐞𝐫 𝟏𝟎 𝐂𝐡𝐚𝐩𝐭𝐞𝐫 𝟏𝟏 𝐂𝐡𝐚𝐩𝐭𝐞𝐫 𝟏𝟐
Total Word Count: 48.4 k
⋆⋆ ⋆⋆ ⋆⋆ ⋆⋆ ⋆⋆ ⋆⋆ ⋆⋆ ⋆⋆ ⋆⋆ ⋆⋆ ⋆⋆ ⋆⋆ ⋆⋆ ⋆⋆ ⋆⋆ ⋆⋆ ⋆⋆ ⋆⋆ ⋆⋆
𝐁𝐚𝐜𝐤 𝐓𝐨 𝐌𝐚𝐬𝐭𝐞𝐫𝐥𝐢𝐬𝐭
#bts#bts fanfic#bts x reader#bts yoongi#bts jimin#bts taehyung#bts jungkook#bts hoseok#bts namjoon#bts seokjin#bts fic#crescent tides#bts fantasy au#bts au#bts ff#mermaid#bts au fic#crescent tides masterlist#bts min yoongi#bts au fanfic#bts mermaid au#bts park jimin#bts fandom#bts angst#bts x fem!reader#bts x y/n#mermaid bts
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Midnight Fangs - Poly BTS X Reader (Prologue)
Summary: The werewolves thought they found all their mates. They never imaged they’d met another, let alone that she’d be a vampire.
Warning: Blood, Alcohol, Sex, Breeding, Mate Au Supernatural AU, Poly Au, Unrequited Love, Rejection, Hurt/Comfort, Other… (Specific Warnings not mentioned will be made in each chapter.)
[Series Masterlist] [Your Here] - [Next] <-
You fled from your Nest.
You fled from your Nest, from the people who turned you almost 200 years ago, from the people who taught you everything you know now about yourself. Vampires have very strong bonds, they live with their Nest forever. The people who turn them and the people who are also turned. The two only reason why a vampires nest would be small is because of Hunters. You ran away from your Nest: your home, your family, your providers. Your an idiot. A lone vampire wouldn’t make it without their family.
You’ve heard phrased, phrases like “lone wolf,” and “free spirit,” everyone’s heard those phrases and in those phrases… Lone Vampire, didn’t exist. Every Vampire always said that their was a reason for that.
As the moon rises in the sky, you look at it from under a tree. Glad the sun would finally be gone from irritating your skin more. You hated swearing layers and hats, you sometimes missed the sun on your skin.
Most supernatural creatures were… sociable, but perhaps that isn’t the right word for all of them, it was more… kept to groups. There was a reason for that.
It meant you wouldn’t survive on your own.
-
-
-
Sociable was, however, the right word for werewolves. Wolves love the night, especially full moons. Werewolves were rowdy, social, and loud. You could tell from the howls you’d hear two miles away and from the many paw prints left behind in the mud after a full moon.
They loved many things.
In that love, what they loved and put above all else: their Pack. Werewolves, they had a more… engraved structure to their packs. For a vampire, the oldest is the leader. For a wolf, the most qualified Alpha is.
It’s a common… rumor that vampires and werewolves don’t get along. Cats and dogs as people would say. Wether that rumor is true or not, is up to a case to case Basis. Cats and dogs can co-exist in certain homes, when conditions are met.
Why was he even thinking of vampires? There would be no reason to think more of this subject. Cats and dogs, they would have no effect on his life with his pack. Jin sighs and shakes his head as he looks at his pack, his mates, trying to get rid of the thoughts.
Why would he even want to co-exist with a vampire? Most of them were too… cold, it was like they were searching for weaknesses to exploit. Always turning their noses in disgust, “You smell- horrible- too strong- like dog.” They’d say, while they smell like nothing but blood and death.
“Hey, Jin you okay?” Hoseok asks leaning his head against the omegas shoulder. The beta leaned onto the omegas scent gland, trying to soothe the Omega. He could smell a bit of his confusion and disappointment, even if it was the slightest, most minuscule change.
“Yeah, just thinking.”
“Joon and Jumin are in the garden.” The beta causally mentioned. As the two of them looked out at them in the over grown, neglect garden. Jimin trips over a bed of something the pack doesn’t care to identify. Junjook stumbled after him and trips into the plants.
“I think the garden has seen better days anyway.” Yoongi shrugged scratching his messy hair as he walked in to the kitchen. A empty cup of coffee in hand, the alpha sighed as he glanced out the window at what was suppose to be a garden.
It was a large fences off area near the back of the cabin. The pack had picked the cabin up once upon a time, it was run down and old but now it was new again, everything was working the way it was suppose to and now it was… perfect. It felt like every room was brimming with love. The garden however, no one ever got around too. The forgotten space in the back of the house. During a full moon a while back Junkook had dug the remaining dead plants up leaving behind a pile of dirt. The pile of dirt was left, the causal “I’ll get around to it” was thrown here and there. Sure, but they all knew no one would end up taking responsibility for the garden.
If they wanted to be in touch with nature they’d go on a walk in the woods. It’s in their nature, Not planting. Digging? Maybe, yeah sure. But if they wanted berries they’d go find them in the forest. It was a waste growing them when they can just go to the store anyway?
At least. Those were the justifications. Truthfully, they didn’t know why they left it untouched for so long. It was a nagging ache in their chest… as if something wasn’t right and it just… needed to be left alone.
______
Note: Hey, so… I made this because, Bts fanfiction is really easy to find and I’ve been reading it because- hey, I want to read a specific type of fic? Bts fandom has 20 of them at least! So I thought, I’d give back…? I mean the authors are all sooo good, I just hope to live up to them. But… I don’t really know a lot about the boys? I’ve watched interviews and tried my best! But if something’s off, tell me pls!
Enjoy the series! Any questions, thoughts or concerns pls don’t hesitate! And uh… bye!
#abo au#bts#bts x reader#poly bts#poly bts x reader#vampire reader#light angst#bts fanfic#bts x you#bts x fem!reader#werewolf! bts#yoongi#jimin#junkook#hoseok#taehyung#namjoon#seokjin
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𝒐𝒕7
Bring The Fire : YanderePrinces!ot7 x female reader [series] (@bangfantanfic)
The Royal Scandal : YandereKings!ot7 x maid female reader [scenarios] (@angellgguk)
Unmei : ot7 x princess reader [series] (@peachywritess )
𝒌𝒊𝒎 𝒔𝒆𝒐𝒌𝒋𝒊𝒏
Mercy : YandereKing!seokjin x female reader [oneshot] (@raggaraddy)
𝒌𝒊𝒎 𝒏𝒂𝒎𝒋𝒐𝒐𝒏
Tastes Like Royalty : YandereServant!namjoon x princess reader [ part I ] (@sluttyandere )
Torn Emerald Stockings : YandereKing!namjoon x female reader [ part II ] (@sluttyandere)
𝒎𝒊𝒏 𝒚𝒐𝒐𝒏𝒈𝒊
Beloved : YandereKing!yoongi x fem reader [oneshot] (@bang-tan-bitches)
𝒌𝒊𝒎 𝒕𝒂𝒆𝒉𝒚𝒖𝒏𝒈
Potrait Of A Prince : DrugaddictPrince!taehyung x female reader [oneshot] (@flowerwrites06)
𝒑𝒂𝒓𝒌 𝒋𝒊𝒎𝒊𝒏
Tainted : YanderePrince!jimin x female reader [oneshot] (@girl8890)
𝒋𝒆𝒐𝒏𝒋𝒖𝒏𝒈𝒌𝒐𝒐𝒌
Bloody Love : YandereKing!jungkook x femreader [series] (@hongjoongscafe )
Love Is A Game : YanderePrince!jungkook x fem reader [series] (@lleldey)
Silver Blades : YanderePrince!jungkook x fem reader [oneshot] (@jooniyah)
The Dark Prince : YanderePrince!jungkook x fem reader [series] (@jkeuphoriadreamland)
To Obtain The Flower : YandereKing!jungkook x fem reader [ part I ] (@mingshits )
Primrose : YandereKing!jungkook x fem reader [ part II ] (@mingshits )
Slave 19990319 : YandereAlienprince!jungkook x human! reader [ part I ] (@explicit-tae)
Concubine 19990319 : YandereAlienprince!jungkook x human! reader [ part II ] (@explicit-tae)
You Are My Crown : YanderePrince!jungkook x fem reader [oneshot] (@redsaurrce )
A Prince With A Ugly Heart : Prince!jungkook x fem reader [series] (@daydreamindollie)
Bow To You : King!jungkook x Queen reader [series] (@flowerwrites06 )
Love Letters : Prince!jungkook x maid reader [oneshot] (@bonny-kookoo )
#bts royal au#yandere bts#btsyandere#angst bts#dark bts#bts fanfction#royalbts#darkfiction#prince jungkook#yandere jungkook#yandere namjoon#yandere hoseok#yandere seokjin#yandere taehyung#yandere yoongi#yandere jimin#bts x fem!reader#bts recs#royalty#bts fanfiction
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tell us tell us
If u don't like mxm sorry not sorry
just thinking thots of you and jimin on your knees in front of namjoon. . . tongues lapping at at one anothers. . . and joons throbbing. . .
nastyy grown ppl under the cut
He's twitching you both feel it, playful giggling and teasing kisses causing the man above the two of you stomach to clench and tighten trying not to let his thighs start trembling from pleasure. His pretty babies, flushed, gorgeous and slutty taking turns swallowing his cock, kissing and biting at his thighs. He didn't know where to look, put his hands or if he should force your head down because he fed up with the constant teasing of the thick head of his cock. You pop off lewdly, spit glistening on your thick lips as you go and kiss Jimin. Everything was just so messy and nasty. . . and he loved it. His own hand reaches down to stroke his cock watching you two parts, tongues out and ready. With a groan his thick and heavy load lands onto his stomach, and both of your faces. You and Jimin giggle as he tugs you both up with him leading the sloppy three-way kiss. The sound of the door opening causes you three to part ways seokjin stands in the doorway with a shake of his head.
"When I said entertain them this isn't what I meant.."
#bts x black reader#bts x reader#namjoon x reader#jungkook x reader#seokjin x reader#bts drabble#bts x fem!reader#jimin x reader#jimin x y/n#jimin x you#kim namjoon x reader#park jimin x reader#kim seokjin x reader#bts poly au#ot7 x reader#bts x chubby reader
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Forgotten
words: 7.5k
genre: angst
If my fate is to disappear like this, then this is my last letter - Let go
xx
TW: Mentions of anxiety, panick attack.
Trad: anjinho = little angel.
a/n: Hello, my babies. This story is the translation of ''Forgotten'' that I recently posted. I tried to make it as angsty as possible, hope I have achieved my goal. My apologies before hand for any grammar erros. English is not my first language. I suggest you all read it along with the saddest song you like. Well... with all that being said, I wish you a happy reading (or sad? lmao. dunno). Tell me later what y'all thought. ♥
"Hey! We'll be there soon. Sorry for the delay. Today's rehearsal took longer than expected. We're leaving now."
Received at 5 in the afternoon.
I take a quick glance at the clock, and it shows eight in the evening. A heavy sigh escapes my lips as I feel my heart drumming slowly in my chest, each beat amplifying my growing sense of unease.
I get up from the couch and reach for the umbrella swaying gently in the wind coming from the window. I shut my eyes and take a deep breath, attempting to manage the sudden surge of fear and despair growing in my chest. My heart is racing, and my mind is in overdrive. A sense of mortality and suffocation, all rolled up into a single emotion: anxiety.
I sit down, sliding along the corridor wall. I try to control my breathing while attempting to steady the pounding of my heart. I think that dying in the hallway of a building would be so pointless and dull that it makes me laugh. A laugh, strained and devoid of emotion, but functional.
Heart rate normalizing. Labored, but controlled breathing. Mind stabilized.
I feel my face wet with tears. I wipe them away with trembling hands. When did I start crying? I rise from the floor, swaying a little. I take another deep breath and press the elevator button.
Dad always said that thinking of ridiculous things in difficult moments would help distract me. He was right, as he always was.
The cold, damp breeze of Seoul's streets warmed my soul. Its black skies, like darkness, covered with thick clouds, carried heavy raindrops that, upon impact, met my umbrella, creating beautiful melodies. It was comforting to hear the drops hitting the hard concrete; they reminded me that I wasn't crying alone.
It was thundering when I arrived at the destination. Bright streaks in the sky made the monument even gloomier. I found it ironic how everything matched my feelings. As I entered through the doors, I could already hear muffled cries. Sadness and suffering permeated the air, leaving me melancholic.
After a few more steps, I could see the person I love the most in the world greeting me with a beautiful smile. His eyes were shining like true rays of sunshine. I sit in front of him, sliding my fingers where his name rests. Lee Joon-Ho.
"Dad, I miss you so much," I say aloud, my voice cracking with emotion. "It's been incredibly lonely without you here. You have no idea how much I long for your company," I said, feeling the salty taste of tears. "I'm sorry I couldn't bring my friends to meet you like I promised. They're all caught up with their own lives, you know how it is. But don't worry, I'll bring them next time when they're less busy," I chuckle, with no emotion.
I hear footsteps behind me. I stand up excitedly, my heart pounding, but this time as a sign of comfort. They didn't forget. I feel my face stretch into a small smile, which is quickly dissolved.
"Hello, young lady. Good evening," the guard gives me a sympathetic smile. "I'm sorry to disturb you, but I need to ask you not to linger too long on your visit today. The rain caused some minor leaks, and we'll have to close a little earlier."
"Oh okay, I understand," I responded in a whisper.
"I'm sorry. You have 10 minutes. I'll leave you alone," he said, bowing and leaving promptly.
I turn again, sitting on the floor.
"Dad, today I have to leave a little earlier. But don't worry, I'll be back soon," I feel the tears fall like the drops falling from the sky. "I love you so much," I say between sobs. "I miss you."
I stand up in desperation, running out the door, feeling the drops fall freely on my body, without the protection of the umbrella. It was as if I was washing away all the bad feelings flowing from my being.
Arriving home, I take a hot shower and change into comfortable clothes. The room were in dense darkness. It was just the rain and me. And my cat, who was rubbing against my leg, lay on my lap."
I feel my chest inflate with comfort at the presence of the little being and smile at the gesture.
With the phone in hand, I try to distract my restless mind. I see the Twitter icon and feel my heart pounding as if I shouldn't do this, but I do it anyway. The blue screen shining amidst the darkness of the room soon turns into white, leaving my vision blurred. I switch to dark mode and continue scrolling through my feed.
Within a few seconds, I see something that breaks my heart even more. Among the bursts of excitement from Armys, there are videos of the boys, my boys, having fun in a restaurant with her. They forgot about the visitation day because of her. Again, the reason why I was put aside is her.
Knocks on the door make me forget the feelings of jealousy and anger that burned in my body like fire. I hesitated to remove the furry creature from my lap, as it seemed so comfortable. With a little effort, I get up and walk to the door. Upon opening it, I see Adora's face in a comforting smile. Seeing a friendly face, I feel my tears fall freely on my face once again. She immediately drops the bags she was carrying and envelops me in a loving hug.
I can't say for how long we hugged. What I can say is that it was exactly what I needed at that moment. I feel my chest getting lighter as if all the bad feelings had been carried away by the embrace, and I feel grateful to Adora for that.
Slowly I pull away, and I can see her smile return twice as big.
"Better?" she asks, making me nod.
I step aside, and she enters, placing the food bags on the coffee table. I close the door and follow her.
"What did you bring?" I ask curiously, making her laugh.
"I knew food would cheer you up," she laughs. "I brought a lot of junk food. Sweet and savory cookies, ice cream, sweet and sour pork, hamburgers, and sodas."
"Soda?" I wonder. "Since when do you like fizzy drinks? You always said they gave you gas," I hold back a laugh.
"The soda is for you. For me," she reaches into the bag, pulling out two green bottles of soju. "I brought alcohol," she says sticking her tongue out as she shakes the bottles.
I smile at her little dance, but seeing her gummy smile reminds me of him. I feel the sadness wanting to return when I remember the videos, but I cast aside any bad feelings as I grab the ice cream container.
"I didn't want to bring it up, but I'm really sorry I wasn't there. You know how it is at BigHit. I couldn't leave the production until the work was finished," she explains, and I smile.
"It's okay. I understand," I whisper. "The important thing is that you're here now."
"About the boys..." she starts to say, but I quickly cut her off.
"No, it's fine. I don't want to talk about it."
"But you need to, Cassie. You know that. Keeping it all inside will only make it worse. You know you can trust me. Vent it out. I'm here," she holds my hand.
I close my eyes, nodding. I search within myself for the strength to let out everything I'm feeling. Everything that's hurting me. I bite my lower lip and open my eyes. It's going to be okay.
"It's been some time since my friendship with the boys started cooling off," I begin, feeling her squeeze my hand in comfort. "You know I met Tae before he became famous, and he's the one who introduced me to the rest of the boys. Since then, we've had a very strong friendship. We weren't always together, especially with the tours and my work, but we were close, like a real family. No matter how long we went without seeing each other, nothing changed, until recently," I sigh. "Park Ji-Hye showed up about 2 months ago, a few weeks before my dad passed away. She auditioned for the dancer position and passed the test," Adora nods.
"Yeah, I saw her audition," she says.
"So, since that day, I saw her getting closer and closer to the boys. They were always talking about how cool and funny she is, and, you know, I was happy for them. A new friendship is always good, especially for them, who are famous and always have to be careful with opportunists. But it never crossed my mind that she would take the place I had in their lives," I smile sadly. "They started visiting me much less. Calling me much less. Inviting me to the dorm or out much less. Until the day I literally became nothing to them," I look at Adora, whose face is red with anger.
"These..." I interrupted her.
"You don't want to lose your job, right?" I ask, laughing. "And you can't blame them either. She became their official dancer, which means wherever they go, she's with them," I shrug. "She's with them all the time, and that surely made them closer to her. Even more than me," I feel my eyes welling up. "I don't want to lose them, but I feel like I already did."
"Hey," she shakes me. "Calm down, breathe. I know they messed up. And they messed up badly, but it doesn't mean they've forgotten about you," Adora says, trying to comfort me.
"They forgot me the day my dad died, Adora. I'll never forget that. I feel like on that day, I died twice. I remember calling them in desperation, crying, not knowing what to do, feeling like my world was falling apart," I pause as I feel all the emotions returning. "And they said they were coming, but they never showed up," I continued after a few seconds of silence. "After that, they sent me a message explaining that Park Ji-Hye had gotten hurt dancing and they were with her at the hospital," Adora nods.
"Yeah, I remember. She just fell on her butt, but she made a scene like she broke her back. Everyone was freaking out at the company, even Bang PD. But in the end, it was just drama," she laments.
"After that, they didn't even visit me. Not even once," I laughed with no emotion. "Right after, they forgot my birthday. I understand that I wasn't excited at all because of my dad, but it wouldn't hurt to receive some supportive or congratulatory messages from them. I was so upset that I sent some sad texts. In less than thirty minutes, they were knocking on my door. We cried a lot, but I felt like a part of me had come back to life and that everything was going to be okay," I sarcastically laughed. "I couldn't have been more wrong, could I?" I asked.
"Cassie..."
"It's okay. You don't have to say anything. After today, I finally understood," I grab a spoon. "They found someone better than me. Someone who can be with them all the time and help them when they need it. I'm just sad that person isn't me. Not anymore," I shove the spoonful of ice cream into my mouth, to prevent the tears stuck in my throat from coming out.
For the rest of the night, Adora didn't bring up the subject again, and I was grateful for that.
A random movie played on TV, but my mind was far away. I looked to the side and saw Adora sleeping with her mouth open. A piece of cookie rested on her cheek while her hand lay above her head. I silently chuckled, covering us and then turning off the TV.
A distant ringing sound caught my attention. I tapped around the couch until I found the phone under the cushion. My eyes automatically closed from the sudden contact with the bright screen, but just as they closed, they widened.
After the first notification, thousands started to show up. My heart throbbed in my chest as my body was flooded with nervousness.
"Min PD: Cassie, please tell me you're there."
"Joonie: Please respond. We're sorry. It wasn't our intention not to show up..." The message appeared cut off because I hadn't unlocked the phone yet.
"Hobierto: Believe us, Cassie. Please, we know you're awake. Answer us."
"Jinnie: Cassandra, we would never do anything to hurt you. Please let us explain."
"Mochi: Answer the phone."
After that message, a group call popped up on the screen. I stared at it, battling the urge to answer. I sighed deeply and threw the phone back onto the couch because no matter how much I wanted to talk to them, I was still hurt. I didn't want to answer and end up fighting. Saying things without thinking and ending up in a worse situation. The best thing to do now was to rest.
I made myself comfortable on the bed we had arranged on the floor, and put the pillow over my head to block out the notifications. When I didn't see any changes, I pressed the power button on my phone and confirmed it right away. I lay back down and took a deep breath. Tomorrow is a new day. Everything will be okay.
——————————————————
It wasn't even dawn when I heard knock after knock. Disoriented, I got up, searching for where the noise was coming from until my feet led me to the front door. I looked at the clock hanging on the wall and got irritated to see it was six past two in the morning.
I swung the door open, ready to argue with whoever had woken me up so early after going to bed so late, but I lost my voice when I saw the seven people I loved most staring at me ty forlornly.
I felt two arms embrace me tightly, followed by two more until I lost count. Desperate whispers for forgiveness echoed in my ear, making me feel loved... until a certain moment.
Memories of what had happened the night before made me wake up from the sleep I didn't know I was in. Slowly, I distanced myself from the seven, able to see the tears streaming down some of their faces and sadness emanating from the others.
"Cassie..." Jimin starts. "I'm so sorry. It wasn't our intention to leave you alone in such a difficult time. Please, believe us."
"We didn't come here to lie to you, Cassandra..." Namjoon says. "It really wasn't our intention. I know this is going to sound completely wrong, but we made a promise to Ji-Hye. We promised to take her out to celebrate her birthday since she's far from her family and would probably celebrate alone," I try to hide a grimace.
They couldn't miss her birthday, but could miss mine.
"As soon as we finished eating, we were going to come straight here. And we really were, Cas, really. But the company called saying we had to go there to finalize the last details for the album. It was then that we sent several messages in the group, but you didn't see any."
"That's why we're here," Taehyung says, interrupting Namjoon. "Cassie, listen to me. You're one of the most important people in my life. Sorry if lately my actions haven't shown that, but please, please, Cas, don't be mad at us. I couldn't bear to know that you're upset because of me," he whispers.
"Go to the dorms tonight. Let's talk about this calmly," Hoseok suggests.
I remain silent for a few minutes.
"Come on, please. Hum? Hum?'' Tae shakes my arm. ''You'll go, right? Say yes," he asks.
"Okay," I sigh deeply. "I'll go."
I feel arms wrapping around my body again, and I relax, enjoying the contact. This time, the hug lasted only a few seconds. The boys said goodbye, saying they needed to be at the company in a few hours.
"Tonight at 7. We'll be waiting for you," Yoongi said and then left.
I closed the door, trying to contain my excitement and the obvious smile on my face. As I turned to go back to bed, I was startled to see only Adora's head peeking out from behind the couch. She had a radiant smile on her face as she looked at me with raised eyebrows.
"Shut up," I say, making her laugh.
——————————————————
I look at the clock on the wall. It's 8:07 in the evening. Damn, I was late. I could already hear Adora's voice slowly emerging in my mind, saying that I should have listened to her and picked out my outfit earlier. Shaking my head, I focus on finishing getting ready. The last thing I needed right now was a lecture from my own mind.
I hear knocks and the doorbell ringing repeatedly.
"Shit," I mutter as I hop over to the door.
I try to put on my sock while walking to the door, but my unfailing plan soon becomes fallible when I trip over my own hand and fall on the floor. The knocks and the doorbell grow louder, and I feel irritation creeping in.
"ALRIGHT, I'M COMING," I yell and pick myself up.
I walk back to the door with a pout and my hair completely tousled, covering my face. I take a deep breath, fix my hair, put on a fake smile, and finally open the door. As I see the seven people I love most in the world looking at me with confused faces, I feel my smile turn genuine, and the earlier irritation vanish as if it had never existed.
"Is everything okay? Why didn't you come?" I hear Taehyung ask as he scrutinizes me from head to toe."
"What happened? Something serious?" Seokjin asks, and I shake my head.
"No, guys, sorry. I almost died trying to choose a good outfit to wear and ended up running late, sorry," I explained laughing.
''What do you mean you almost died?" Jungkook asks as I watch their faces turn into a grimace."
"It was nothing, really," I reassure, taking a quick glance at Jungkook, who was holding back his laugh.
He knew it. I am sure he did.
"Are you sure you didn't... you know... fall on your ass?" he smirks. "I'm sure I heard a huge..."''
"Hobi," I said excitedly, "What do you have there?" I pointed to the bags he was carrying while Jungkook laughed.
That little prick.
''Food," he says, shaking the bags. ''We know how much you love eating''.
I chuckle and make way for them to enter. In a few minutes, the food was already on the coffee table, and an improvised bed was set up on the living room floor. I change into more comfortable clothes and join them.
"Look, before we start, we want you to know how sorry we are," Yoongi says.
"Yes... Sorry for not being there on the visitation's day," Jimin adds. "If there's anything you want to say, anything that's bothering you, please let us know. We'll fix it all, Cassie. ''he holds my hand.'' We want things to go back to how they used to be."
"We're here for you, Cas," Jin finishes, and I smile weakly.
I pause for a moment, feeling that it still wasn't the right time. So, I just sigh and shake my head.
"It's okay, guys. Really," I open with a smile. "Let's just watch this movie already. I'm dying to see who'll be the first one to cry and shake in fear like a little kitten." I say, trying to change the subject, and smirk when I realize it worked.
"I am sure it won't be me," Hoseok says with confidence. "Cause you know..." he shows off his muscles. "I'm a man," he pauses for a minute.
It doesn't take long until Hoseok's laughter fills the room, making everyone laugh.
"Who listens to him talking like this, doesn't even think the Gladiator sandal outside belongs to him," Jungkook says, making Hoseok look at him flabbergasted.
''Hey, what do you mean by that?'' he asks shookedt. ''It's fashionable''
"Yeah, Hobi. Sure is," Yoongi says, patting his shoulder.
''Why I don't believe you are being honest?'' Hoseok asks putting his finger under his chain. ''I'm going to expose you on Twitter. Or should I say X?''
''What? Are you into Xvideos?'' Namjoon asks as he returns.
Everybody stops and looks at him. When did he even leave to begin with?
"What were you doing, Joonie?" I ask, smirking at him. "Were you in the bathroom?" he nods as the rest of the boys laugh.
''Now we know why you are thinking naughtiness'' Jimin says.
Namjoon's face turns red as he shakes his hands nervously. He tries to sit down on the couch but somehow ends up falling on the ground. We can see his cellphone flying around the living room as he throws his arms in the air in an attempt to regain his balance, but it doesn't work, as expected.
''No need to be nervous, Joonie'' I say. ''Everybody masturbates once in a while.''
''Do we?'' Yoongi looks at me suspiciously.
"I mean," I chuckle nervously. "How did we even get to this conversation? Let's just watch the movie for God's sake."
"Nah, nah. Don't you try coming up with excuses," Tae says abruptly. "What do you mean by that? Are you dating someone?" Jungkook seems to be having fun as he opens a beer can.
''What? Me? Dating?'' I laugh. ''Not even close. But I can't say the same about Jungkook, can I?'' he chokes.
''Uh? What you on about?'' he asks as he cleans his mouth.
‘’Seven days a week, huh?’’ he burst into laughter.
He pauses for a minute before smirking.
"Hm, why's that, baby girl?" he says, leaning in my direction. "Are you jealous?" he asks, putting a strand of my hair behind my ear. "Do you want me to…" he bites his lower lip. "You know," he says putting his finger on my lips.
I can already feel the cringeness and second-hand embarrassment traveling throughout my body as the rest of the boys laugh.
This prick.
‘’You really need to get out from twitter,’’ I say, shoving him away. ‘’The next step is to put up a black and white profile picture and call yourself a webdom’’
He raises both of his middle fingers in my direction before turning his attention back to the beer can.
‘’Are you guys done? Can I finally play this damn movie?’’ Yoongi asks, making everybody nod.
––––––––––––––––––––––––––––––––
Time passed quickly, and before I knew it, it was time for them to leave. Unfortunately, they couldn't stay overnight. They had to leave very early the next day due to their schedule.
I hesitated to get up; I didn't want to accompany them to the door out of sheer laziness, and feeling Taehyung shaking me with his foot made me even more sluggish.
"If you keep doing that, I swear I'll fall asleep," I say, making him huff.
"Come on, sloth imitation. Take us to the door," Jimin says, but gives up when he sees Jungkook lying next to me.
"Jungkook, I'm sure you really like your video game, right?" Seokjin asks, and in a jump, Jungkook gets up.
"Are you really not taking us to the door?" Yoongi asks, and I remain silent. "Okay then."
When I open my eyes to see what he was going to do, I feel an arm gather and squeeze my legs while a hand starts tickling my feet furiously.
"JESUS!" I scream in surprise.
I heard laughter as I fought for my life. The strange feeling that tickling brought made me confused if I was laughing because I found it funny or if it was fear messing up my nervous system. The laughter increased as I writhed and screamed for help.
"YOONGI, YOU JERK!" I said without realizing that I was actually yelling.
"Weren't you sleepy?" Yoongi asks. "So, I'm trying to help you."
"WAIT UNTIL I GET UP, YOU PIECE OF BROWN SUGAR, I'M GOING TO END YOU."
"Are you going to take us to the door?" he asks.
"OKAY, OKAY, I'LL TAKE YOU, JUST STOP FOR THE LOVE OF GOD," I yell.
I feel my body calm down and my brain start functioning again as the tickling ceases. I looked at Yoongi who was laughing while sniffing his hand.
"Ew, you have smelly feet," he says, and I get up.
"Come here, you little jerk," I chase after him as he runs away mocking me.
After a few seconds, I could already feel that the 70% of water in my body had evaporated and the air in my lungs was scarce. When did my body become so sedentary?
"Idiot," I curse Yoongi who laughs. "I hate you."
"I love you too, beautiful thing," I hear him say.
Finally, I accompany them to the door. After a lazy farewell, I see them about to leave, but a click in my mind makes me stop them.
"As you know, I graduated from college, but since it was at the time when my father died, I didn't have any enthusiasm to celebrate. Adora recommended that I have a celebration the day after tomorrow night, since it's the weekend. Just to not let it go unnoticed. So... you guys are invited."
"We'll be here, don't worry," Namjoon says, and I smile nodding.
We say goodbye again, and this time, I see them leave. Seeing the elevator door close, I go back inside the house. The smile on my face never leaves me for a second, and finally, after so long, I could feel that things would really be okay.
––––––––––––––––––––––––––––––––
Thanks to Adora, everything was organized on time. The food was ordered since neither she nor I wanted anyone to die from food poisoning. The time we ended up in the hospital the day we cooked for each other was enough. No need to repeat the dose.
I check the time on my phone and see it's 8pm. They would arrive at any moment, so I sit next to Adora on the couch to chat until then.
☂ ☂
Some time passed, and the boys still hadn't arrived. I look at the time again and see that it's 9:46. I try not to think the worst and choose to believe they would be here soon.
☂ ☂
I sigh deeply at seeing what time it is: 11:14. I try to ignore Adora's pitying look and get up from the couch. I suppress the tears once again. I am tired of crying. And more than ever, I realize that they don't deserve my tears.
"Cassandra..." Adora calls me, and I look at her. "I'm sure there's an explanation for this. Something must have happened at the company, and they couldn't let us know." I shake my head.
Something inside me told me that wasn't it, and I decided to trust my intuition.
"Adora, can you take me to the dorm?," I ask softly. "I don't think I'll have the courage to go alone," I weakly smile, and she nods.
"Of course, my love. Of course..."
––––––––––––––––––––––––––––––––
The car journey lasted less than I wished. My mind was constantly clouded by memories, anxiety making the painful memories hurt twice as much. I laughed in disbelief. I wondered what I had done wrong to deserve this.
"Thank you for bringing me," I look at Adora. "And thank you for always being by my side in difficult times. If I felt supported and loved, be sure that it's all because of you. You're an amazing person, Adora, and I hope you know that." she smiles.
"Regardless of what happens there, remember that you are enough. Not for them, but for yourself. Don't belittle yourself for them, Cassie, and don't let the love you feel for them speak louder than your self-love. If you survived two hellish months without their presence, be sure that you can live your life and be immensely happy in the future without them. I guarantee you that," I feel her hand squeezing mine for comfort, and I smile. "I'll be waiting for you here," I nod.
I get out of the car, feeling Adora's words take effect. I walk bravely towards the towering building, ignoring every feeling of nostalgia trying to invade me. I couldn't lose focus now.
Arriving on their dorm's floor, I feel my heart skip a beat. I pause for a moment and try to put my thoughts and feelings in order. Seeing no result, I lean against the wall and try in every way to avoid a panic attack that was about to come. As if it were a heavenly help, I feel my phone vibrate. With trembling hands, I pick it up and see a message from Adora.
"Don't forget, you are strong and capable. And never for a moment think you are alone, because I'm here for you."
I clutch my phone tightly. Adora is right. I am strong and I am capable. I can do this because regardless of what happens, I will be okay.
I take a deep breath, gathering all the strength and courage from my being, and knock on the door. I freeze when I realize what I've done, but I quickly compose myself. I will be okay.
A few seconds passed and no one answered, so I knocked again. But just like the first time, there was no response. After the third attempt, I decide to enter. Typing the password on the door, I entered the dormitory.
Upon realizing that there was no one in the main hall, the pounding of my heart calmed down. I begin to walk through the dormitory, recalling every good moment I had with my boys. I feel the sadness emanating in my chest once again.
I really didn't want to lose them.
As I walked down the corridor, I heard voices coming from the kitchen. I started walking with firm steps, but I felt my legs waver when I heard a female voice among their voices. It was her.
"Jungkook-oppa, you're so silly," I hear her delicate laughter, feeling jealousy burning in my chest.
It should be me there.
"The silly you love," I hear Jungkook reply.
I could hear the happiness in his voice. It was as if they didn't need anyone else at the moment but her. And that made me hate her, but my own mind scolded me. She is not worthy of my hatred. She is as innocent as I am in this story. She did nothing to hurt me, so why would I hate her?
"Hinnie," I hear Hoseok's voice.
Hinnie...
"Try it and tell me what you think."
There was a moment of pause until applause and sounds of appreciation were made.
"It's amazing, oppa," she says. "You really keep improving in the kitchen every day."
Unable to bear it anymore, I think of simply turning around and leaving, but something catches my attention. And it was precisely there, in that moment, that I regretted staying.
"Why do I feel like we're forgetting something?" I hear Taehyung say, and I feel my body tremble.
Once again, there was a pause until someone shouted.
"Shit, really," Jimin said. "We forgot to take the drinks out of the freezer."
I feel my heart break, as if that were possible. I let out a disbelieving laugh and finally come out from where I was hiding.
"And try more of this," Hoseok suddenly stops. "Cassie..."
I hear the sound of something falling to the ground. Soon, everyone was staring at me wide-eyed. I repress the urge to laugh. I realize how messy my whole body was the moment I wanted to laugh and not cry.
"Oh no," Jimin says, as if remembering something. "The party."
With that said, everyone becomes even more desperate. Seeing them approaching, I panic.
"Don't come near,"
They quickly stop. I see them not knowing what to do. And it wasn't just them. I end up getting disoriented with so much pressure. Where did my courage go when I needed it most?
"Um... what's going on?" she asks, and I close my eyes.
It's not her fault. It's not her fault...
"Ji-Hye, could you leave us alone for a moment?" Namjoon asks.
"Yes, of course. It's time for me to leave anyway," she gets up. "I'll see you later," she says bowing both to them and to me.
After she left, silence hung in the air. I tried to hold back my laughter, but when I saw everyone's confused faces, I knew I had failed. When I noticed that no one was going to say anything, I took the initiative.
"Do you know what's more disappointing? It's that I really thought this time would be different," I shrug. "I guess I was wrong, wasn't I?"
"Cas..."
"Do you remember when you asked me if I had something to say, Jinnie? If something was hurting me? Well, I do, and I hope I won't be interrupted."
With no response, I continue.
"I feel like I died. It's been a while since I am just surviving," I start. "The fact that you didn't come to the visitation isn't the part that hurts the most, it's that you weren't there when my father passed away. I remember how desperate I was, and the only people I could think of were you. But you weren't there. Damn, you didn't even call." I whisper as tears fall freely down my face. "When I found myself alone in the hospital, realizing that the person who adopted me and chose me to love had died, that was my first death. The person who loved me, who looked beyond language or race barriers, and who taught me everything I know had suddenly left, without even giving me a chance to say goodbye. Do you know how I felt? Devastated."
I pause for a moment. Melancholy takes over my body as I recall all the feelings I felt that day, and for a moment, I allow myself to cry all I needed. I sob so much that I thought I might choke. Without caring about looks or pity, I just allowed myself, knowing that everything would be okay.
"When I called the only people I thought I could count on, and they told me they were coming, I didn't feel so alone," I let out a humorless laugh. "Until I realized that those people never arrived. The people who always said they would be there for me weren't there when I needed them the most. That was my second death," I look at Jin. "Don't say these things to anybody if they are not coming from your heart. Don't hurt anyone else by saying you have their backs or that you will always be there for them when in reality it's not the truth."
I look at each one. Their gazes were distant, as if they were reliving every moment.
"You know, I don't want you to think I'm mad at Park Ji-Hye. Actually, quite the opposite. I was really happy when you said you met someone nice. Someone who really cared about you and genuinely wanted your friendships. I know how tough it is for you to find real friendships with all the fame, so I felt fulfilled too. I remember telling daddy excitedly, and he laughed at my excitement, happy for you and for me. Right after that, I lost him, and little by little, I lost you too, like I was meant to be alone," I smile weakly. "I am sorry if I'm being selfish, but that's how I feel. You guys forgot my birthday. Forgot the visitation days, and to top it off, you forgot my graduation party. It's like you replaced me as if I never even existed in your lives, and that really hurts. Really.''
I finish, and only then I realize they were crying with me. Some didn't have the courage to meet my gaze. We spent a few minutes without anyone saying anything. The only thing filling the air was the sound of our sniffles and sobs.
"On the day your father died," Namjoon begins. "We felt like we had lost a family member because he was, in fact, one. I am truly sorry, Cas, but for me, Park Ji-Hye's fall was an escape. I didn't want to face reality. I wouldn't know how to react to the loss of someone so special, and I also wouldn't know how to act with you," he looks at me.
"On your birthday, we thought you would like to be alone. It would be the first without your father, so we didn't know what to do, Cassie. We panicked," Jimin sighs. "But now I realize how you felt," he laughs humorlessly. "My God, I never thought I'd be such a horrible friend. What a disappointment," he whispers, covering his face with his hand.
"On visitation days," I look at Hoseok. "I confess that I clung to any opportunity not to go, Cas," he cries. "Not because I didn't love you. I love you, and I love you very much, but I never knew how to react to death. The only two times I entered a cemetery, I spent the rest of the week feeling bad, with depressive thoughts. I also couldn't let Armys worry. I didn't want their 'Sun' to lose its brightness. I am so sorry for not being able to tell you this before. I didn't want to seem selfish."
I suppress a disbelieving laugh.
"Hearing all this, I realize how futile our apologies seem," Yoongi laughs weakly. "But they are true, Cassie... I understand what Hoseok says. You know about my history with depression, don't you?" he asks, and I nod. "It's the same thing for me. If I enter a cemetery, my thoughts don't stop. Some come in a worse form, and I feel like I'm going crazy."
"We were selfish, Cas," Seokjin says. "I was. I didn't want Armys to see us sad because I knew the chaos it would be. I have no words to express how special you are to me," he pauses. "Cassie, you are my sister, my family. You weren't crying alone; I cried with you. I just couldn't show it. I knew it would be worse if I saw you cry, just like I am seeing now."
There was a moment of silence. Until his voice broke.
"I am sorry," Taehyung says. "Damn, I don't even know what to say, Cassie. You are one of the most precious people I have ever met. I remember how you stayed with us through thick and thin. I also remember how happy you were for us at the beginning, and I know the genuine happiness you felt when we received our first award. You stood by my side when my grandma passed away. How could I not be by your side too? My God," he puts his hand on his head in an act of despair. "You stayed by our side when we thought about disbanding. It was you who helped us see why we are here, who helped us find reasons to stay," he looks at me anxiously. "How could I be so selfish?"
"We thought that regardless of anything, you would always be by our side. That you would understand us, even with our deplorable attitudes. We always thought we would have you next to us, so we neglected you," Yoongi shakes his head. I feel like he answered more to Taehyung than to me. "Damn, anjinho, I'm sorry," I lower my head as I hear him call me by the nickname I loved so much.
"The fact that we started a new friendship also influenced us," Jungkook says. "We were so excited that someone, besides you, wanted a friendship without interest that without realizing it, we put aside the one that had been with us from the beginning," I hear Jungkook say muffled, as his two hands covered his face.
"We don't deserve you, Cassandra. We left you at the most difficult moment of your life, and yet you never stopped loving us," Yoongi pulls his own hair, a habit he always did when he was nervous. "We can't let you leave thinking that we don't care about you because, Cassie, that would be a complete lie. With the stress of the comeback, things only got worse. It was rehearsal, recording, agendas to fulfill, productions, trips, tours. Our minds were a mess, and Park Ji-Hye tried to help us from there. We know she's not the one to blame, and it's not your fault either. It's ours and only ours. I know this will seem like a lame excuse, but I didn't want to let you go thinking that you aren't precious to us. You are Cas. And you always will be."
I close my eyes and try to control my breathing. If before I felt bad, now I feel ten times worse. It seemed like I didn't even know them anymore. The feeling of comfort they made me feel was replaced by anguish. By sadness.
I open my eyes, and for the last time, I look at my boys. I realize that Taehyung understood my gaze.
"Cassie, please... Please don't..." Taehyung starts, but is interrupted by Seokjin.
"Don't you dare say what I think you're going to say."
"But I can't lose her, Hyung. I can't lose her," Taehyung says, crouching down.
I think about going to him, but then I retreat my body. If I do that, I know my heart will weaken, and at the moment, the only person I need to think about is myself.
"I'm sorry, hyung, but I'll be selfish," Namjoon says to Seokjin, and I look at him confused. "I don't know what your decision will be, Cassie. I'll support you, even if you choose to leave without our friendship. But I beg you... Cassandra, I implore you, try to find in yourself a little piece that doesn't want to give up on us. It doesn't have to be now. I want you to heal, and I don't care how long it takes. The only thing I ask is that you don't forget us and don't give up on us. Come back to us when you feel ready. I don't want to lose you, Cas. I..."
"I really hope you find a way to forgive us, Cassie. But understand that if you don't, we'll understand. You, more than anyone else, have every right to hate us," Yoongi says, interrupting Namjoon. "I hope you don't forget about us because, with all my heart, we won't forget about you."
I feel my heart shattering with every tear that falls on their faces. I smile weakly. I will really miss them.
I bow in a sign of respect, and as I return to my normal position, I raise my hand to my heart.
"Thank you, my boys. For all the good moments. You were a very important part of my life, which I will carry forever. I will never forget about all of you," I smile faintly. "How could I forget my first true friendships? My first loves?" I whisper.
I take a breath and smile. A true smile. A smile of gratitude.
"Regardless of what happened, you guys deserve nothing but love and happiness. Don't let anyone say otherwise. Even far away, please remember I will always be cheering for your success. And whenever you feel unloved, remember I love you. Very, very much.'' I can hear their sobs getting stronger. ''Don't think I blame you for what happened; I think I finally understand that life has its ups and downs. People come and unfortunately go," I see Taehyung desperate, trying to find something to say. I look away. I need to be strong. "I hope that every day your friendship with Park Ji-Hye grows, and that you take from all of this a lesson.''
I take a deep breath, looking at them for the last time.
''From the bottom of my heart... I wish you to be immensely happy."
In a gesture, I send thousands of kisses. I see Tae wanting to approach, so I turn around and start walking towards the exit, and this time, I don't cry. I feel the weight of sadness in my chest, but the weight of peace for having put everything I felt out was greater. And for the first time in two months, I believe it when I say that everything will be okay.
#bts fanfction#bts imagines#bts reactions#bts scenarios#bts x reader#bts au#bts x you#bts x fem!reader#bts angst#jungkook angst#namjoon angst#seokjin angst#yoongi angst#hoseok angst#jimin angst#taehyung angst#bts universe#bts fake texts#bts fanfic#bts reader#bts requests
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BTS Reaction To Hearing You Singing
Not a request but I've been thinking about writing something like this because I haven't been able to stop vibing to BTS's songs lately and someone walked in on me - 🤦🏽♀️
Seokjin
“Do you want to listen to music?” Seokjin asked as he passed you the cutting board, a knife, and some salt. “I have a playlist on my phone.”
The two of you had decided to go all out on cooking dinner tonight - for no particular reason - and Seokjin was starting to feel exhausted from the sheer amount of topics you could bring up in just under thirty minutes or so.
So now he was suggesting music in a hopes that it would get you to focus more on cooking rather than striking up a thousand different conversations.
You shook your head. “Not really.” But then you paused and glanced at your boyfriend, whose face was inscrutable. “Well if you really want to it’s fine.”
He shrugged indifferently. "Let's just focus on dinner."
Nodding, you brandished the carrots and set them on the cutting board, beginning to slice them up into 2-3 pieces. A relaxing silence fell over the both of you as you concentrated. However Seokjin's mind had wandered to his career as he watched you cut up the carrots, and he found himself subconsciously humming along to a few of his songs before he finally couldn't bear the silence any longer.
"How about I sing?" Jin eventually suggested.
You nearly dropped the knife in shock, jerking your head towards Seokjin whose eyes had taken a somewhat distant - almost wistful - look to them. You'd asked him to sing for you many times before, but he usually rejected it in fear of overusing his voice. But now that he was the one suggesting it, you couldn't hide your excitement.
"Really?"
"Really."
Seokjin smiled when you nodded eagerly and started to sing Life Goes On. "오늘도 비가 내릴 것 같아, 흠뻑 젖어버렸네, 아직도 멈추질 않아~"
Jin's enchanting voice floated through the kitchen and you closed your eyes briefly, taking a few minutes to appreciate his lovely vocals. And then you also joined in, singing along quietly. You'd never sung in front of him before - you were far to shy to do that - but when Seokjin sung it was like there was some irresistible instinct to join in as well.
"끝이 보이지 않아, 출구가 있긴 할까?" You hummed quietly, and Seokjin paused upon hearing you sing a few more verses with him, surprised at just how gorgeous your singing voice sounded. "발이 떼지질 않아, 않아, oh."
You looked at him in surprise upon realizing that he stopped singing and was watching you. "Why'd you stop?"
A huge grin spread across his face. "You didn't tell me that you could sing jagi. You sounded so beautiful."
Blushing, you turned your head away. "It was nothing."
"It was certainly something." Seokjin insisted, putting his elbow on the counter and tipping his head towards you. "You sounded like an angel~"
"Jinnie~" You whined. "Stop it, you know compliments make me shy."
"But it's true!" He said, coming over to kiss your head and brush the hair from your eyes. "A princess like you only deserves to hear the truth."
Giggling shyly, you shook your head and mumbled thank you. Seokjin was beaming - either because he enjoyed seeing you so flustered or because he was still gushing over your voice, you couldn't tell.
After a while, when you two had returned to cooking, Seokjin asked, "Why haven't you sung for me before?"
"I was too nervous." You answered.
"Aww you're just the cutest thing aren't you!" He poked your cheeks with the most affection smile ever, causing you to redden.
"You have to sing for me more often." He declared. "I need to hear your voice more often - it's like a serotonin boost."
"I don't know..."
He grabbed your hands and tugged you closer, pouting a bit. "Please jagi?"
You hesitated before nodding. "Alright."
Seokjin broke into the cutest smile ever and did a little celebratory dance. "We can sing DNA together - how does that sound?"
"Good." You said, but then he added with a playful - but mischievous smirk,
"You're doing the majority of the verses," Before you could protest, he brought his finger to your lips. "And I'm getting a video of you."
"Hey-"
Seokjin was already reaching for his phone. "C'mon you said you'd do it. How am I going to pass up on such an opportunity to hear you, beautiful?"
Yoongi
"Trust me jagi, you're going to do just fine." Yoongi reassured you, noticing just how nervous you'd become.
He'd finally convinced you too rap some of his lines in Daechwita. Yes, they were difficult but he knew that you were more than capable of rapping to his level - he'd come home on several occasions to overhearing you rap to either his songs or another artist's.
He didn't let it show but he was very excited that you'd agreed - he could hardly sit still in his chair. He'd wanted to ask you to rap for him much sooner but knowing just how shy you could be, he'd waited until you were more comfortable around him.
"Are you sure?" You asked nervously, biting your nails. Yoongi quickly grabbed your hand and pulled it away from your face so you would stop biting and nodded. "I'm sure princess, you can do it. Here, I'll even turn around if it helps. And I'll give you all the time you need."
"Okay."
Doing as he'd promised, Yoongi turned around and waited for you to begin rapping. Glancing up from the sheet he'd given you, you studied the back of his chair for a couple of seconds to make sure he wasn't peeking.
"대취타 대취타 자 울려라 대취타, 대취타 대취타 자 울려라 대취타, 대취타 대취타 자 울려라 대취타." You rapped the first couple of verses. Although Yoongi felt like he was going to explode with excitement upon hearing your voice, he remained silent. "대취타 대취타 자 울려라 대취타, 빛이 나 빛이 나 내 왕관이 빛이 나, 잊지 마 잊지 마 지난 날을 잊지 마."
He hummed along quietly and pulled out his phone to record you. Of course he wouldn't tell you but he was definitely going to send this to Bangtan. He would keep it on repeat when you weren't in the house with him and would listen to it on tour whenever he was missing you or felt anxious.
As you continued rapping, you began to feel more and more confident, and as you entered the last few verses, you could practically feel Yoongi's pride floating around the studio. "I'm a king, I'm a boss, 다 알잖아 내 이름, 입만 산 새끼들, 당장 놈의 목을 쳐."
"대취타 대취타 자 울려라 대취타." You finished with a small pant and looked up as you heard some shuffling. Yoongi stopped recording and spun around, his eyes glowing with pride. “Was it okay?”
“It was wonderful jagi.” Yoongi said, his adorable gummy smile on full display. “You’ve gotten do this for me more often.”
You nodded sheepishly. “Okay.”
Yoongi brightened and beckoned you over. When you complied, he pulled you into his lap and smiled at you, ruffling your hair a bit and chuckling. The two of you didn’t need words to communicate - it was already clear what was being said.
“Will you do a duet with me?” He suddenly asked, surprising you.
“W-with you?” You stammered, and Yoongi nodded in confirmation. “I-I don’t know…”
Yoongi pouted. “Pleaseee?” He drawled out.
Yoongi wasn’t really one to beg, but he so wanted to do a rap duet with you that he was willing to do just about anything.
“Okay fine.” You eventually agreed, much to your boyfriend’s excitement.
The next few hours were spent with Yoongi getting you more comfortable singing and rapping around him. And when you finally didn’t feel shy anymore and you’d practiced with him, he was all up in your face getting lots of videos of you rapping, much to your horror.
“Don’t hide from the camera jagi~”
“You never told me you were going to record me!”
Yoongi sighed and shook his head.“Tsk, you really should’ve anticipated this baby.”
Hoseok
“아 지금 바로 딱 갈게요, 제발 집엔 보내지 마세요~”
Hoseok practically leaped out of bed upon hearing your voice float in from the living room. He was both shocked and delighted as he scrambled to a halt in the hallway that led to the living room, slapping a hand over his mouth with a wide smile sprewding across his face as your voice rang clearly throughout the apartment.
You were busy doing some spring cleaning, subconsciously singing Run BTS as you worked. As you turned around to reach for another rag, you trailed off in surprise upon seeing Hobi standing in the hallway watching you with the biggest smile you’d ever seen.
He looked so cute like that; and you fought the urge to run over and start to tease him about it.
“Hi Hobi.” You said, letting the rag drop to the ground. “What’s up?”
Hobi stared for a couple more seconds before he finally looked down, seeming suddenly very shy.
“I’ve never heard you sing before.” Hobi replied quietly, looking up to meet your gaze with sparkling eyes. “You should’ve told me what a pretty voice you have. And you were signing one of our songs-you sounded amazing jagi.”
You smiled and walked over, wrapping him in a hug as he opened his arms and buried your face into the crook of his neck. Partly to hide your own embarrassment but also because he just looked so damn adorable - it was hard not to want to hug him and smother him in kisses.
“Thanks baby~”
The two of you stood in the living room for a while, wrapped up in each others arms and just taking a moment to appreciate each other. Hobi closed his eyes, and ran his fingers through your hair, thinking about taking a video of you singing to send to Bangtan so he could brag to them about his baby being able to sing.
“Will you continue?” Hobi eventually asked, desperate to hear more of your angelic voice. When you said maybe later because you wanted to finish up cleaning, he practically got on the floor and pleaded with you, promising to sing with you. “Please please Y/N? Your voice is so beautiful I want to hear more of it!”
You giggled as he pressed a kiss to your forehead and proceeded to start offering up a list of more things he’d do in order to get you to sing for him. “Okay okay! Calm down love, you don’t need to do anything but just let me sing and finish cleaning, hmm?”
And Hobi’s entire face lit up and he eagerly nodded. “Yes yes, whatever you want.”
Laughing, you then picked up the rag you dropped and asked Hobi for a beat, and then began to sing. The entire time Hobi’s was a ball of joy, squealing with joy whenever you covered his lines and clapping frantically and showering you with compliments at the end of each song. And you better believe he got the video of you and sent it straight to Bangtan, taking every opportunity to prove to the members how amazing your vocal skills were.
Namjoon
“Jooniee.” You whined, wrapping your arms around the stubborn Namjoon who wouldn’t budge from his chair and tried to physically hoist him him out of the seat to no avail. “C’mon take a break - you’re going to overwork yourself.”
Namjoon let out an exasperated breath and pushed you away lightly, trying to concentrate on what he’d been working on. Although he wouldn’t admit it, he found your whining to be very adorable and incredibly infuriating - it tore at his heart to ignore your precious pleading.
“I’ll take a break in ten minutes.” He promised, taking his gaze off the computer screen for just a moment to look into your eyes.
“That’s what you’ve been saying for the past twenty.” You pouted, crossing your arms over your chest.
He sighed softly. “I know jagi but I have to work on this. It’s important. I’ll be in the living in just a few - alright? And then we can cuddle and do whatever you want.”
Dissatisfied, you turned and left his office without saying anything, the disappointment evident on your face. Namjoon felt incredibly guilty as he turned to work on the track, trying to push your pouty face from his mind.
But so god help him - it was nearly impossible.
“Aish, Y/N’s going to be the death of me.” Namjoon muttered to himself.
As the moments ticked by and Namjoon began more and more engrossed in his project, his stress rose and so did your longing for him. You paced the kitchen and made yourself a small breakfast sandwich that tasted bland.
And then an idea came to your mind as soon as you curled up in your bed to try and take a nap.
“Namjoon?” You called, darting into his studio with a brilliant smile on your face.
Namjoon turned and tried to hide his irritation. The stews was getting to him and he really didn’t need any distractions right now.
“What?”
You walked over and laced your fingers with his, much to his confusion, and pulled him out of the seat. He tried to pry your fingers loose but you were using so much strength that it was incredibly difficult.
“C’mon dance with me.” You giggled, spinning him round.
“Y/N-”
“손가락질 해!” You sang whilst doing a funny little dance. Namjoon’s eyes widened as he recognized his own song - Idol - and a smile broke out on his face. “I know you wanna sing too.” You teased, continuing to do your funny dance. Namjoon shook his head and smiled, content to just watch you. “나는 전혀 신경 쓰지 않네.”
And then you did the strangest - perhaps the most startling - dance he’d ever seen and sang in such a high pitch that your voice cracked.
”Wait stop!” He said, breaking into a huge belly laugh as you continued to do your dance around him and singing the lyrics to idol. “I-I can’t breathe Y/N!”
Chuckling, you replied, “Don’t wanna Joon~”
“지화자 좋다~”
Namjoon completely fell over and laughed until his face was red and his laughter almost fell silent. You were the funniest thing, really, and you always knew just how to get him to laugh. He was a complete mess, sprawled on the floor with tears clinging to his eyelashes and begging you to stop singing. It was utterly hilarious to him, what you were doing to get him to stop working.
As you entered the final chorus, he broke down into another fit of laughter, actually thinking that he was going to pass out from laughing so loud. When you stopped, he was too out of breath to say anything, and you were also feeling quite exhausted.
“You know.” You hummed, leaning down and placing your hands on his shoulders. “I could sing DNA or Blood Sweat & Tears.” His eyes widened and he shook his head, still trying to catch his breath. “If you won’t take a break then I will start singing again, cutie. It made you laugh so much and you seem so much happier so you must enjoy it~”
Namjoon flushed and he grabbed your hands, tears of mirth trickling down his face. “P-please don’t baby, I’ll take a break - I swear.”
You smirked and let him pull you into his arms, helping him calm down. “Good.” And then you pressed a kiss to his forehead. “You worked hard today, I’m so proud.”
He relaxed against you and let out a small exhale, nestling into your chest. “Thanks baby. For the compliment and for cheering me up.”
“Of course Joonie.”
After a while, Namjoon looked up at you and said, “I really need to hear you singing in a normal pitch though.”
You smiled. “We’ll see.”
Jimin
Jimin opened the door to the apartment he shared with you and sighed, exhausted after a day of intense dance practice to perfect some of the choreography he struggled with for Like Crazy. All he wanted to do was lie down, go to sleep, and cuddle with you.
After setting his bags down and taking off his shoes, Jimin was ready to go change into some comfy pajamas when suddenly the sound of your voice came in from the bathroom, making him pause to listen. It sounded like you were singing - to Like Crazy.
“Y/N?”
“Hi Jimin!” You called when you heard him. “I’ll be right out in second and we can talk about your day if your not to tired.”
“Okay.”
He didn’t mention overhearing you singing, hoping that you would start again, but much to his disappointment you remained silently, probably already flustered at having been caught singing.
Jimin, however, was determined to hear your voice again.
He quickly changed into plaid pajamas and made it sound like he’d left the room, but really he was hanging by the door in case you started to sing again. And sure enough, after a while you began to sing again.
“아침도 취해서 오지 않게. 시끄러운 음악 속에 희미해진 나.”
He was more than surprised to hear you singing, and be it that it’s his song, nonetheless. But accompanied by the surprise he felt pride and excitement.
When you came out of the bathroom after a few more minutes, you were surprised to see Jimin waiting for you, and paused in the doorway.
“Jiminie?”
“Hi jagi.” Jimin said, rushing over and wrapping you up in an embrace. He pressed a kiss to your head, surprising you.
“Hi Jimin.” You said, letting him pepper you with kisses before asking, “Everything okay?”
“Yep.” He reassured you, burying his head in your hair. “I just missed you.”
“You saw me just this morning baby.”
“I know but it’s felt like so long jagi.” Jimin pulled away and physically lifted you off the ground, carrying you to the bed. “Let’s go cuddle.”
“Aren’t you hungry though?” You asked as he set you down and put his head in your lap.
“Nope.”
“How was your day?”
You were still trying to figure out why Jimin was acting so clingy all the sudden. He was usually very shy when it came to cuddles or anything of the sort. You so rarely saw him like this unless he was sad, but he didn’t particularly seem to be the case here.
“Better now that I get to hang out with you~”
“Hmm.” You mused, pulling him closer. You waited awhile before beginning saying, “If anything-”
“Shh.” He hushed, pulling a finger to your lips and looking up at you with the cutest face ever. “Just let me cuddle with you, okay?”
You frowned but didn’t push any further. “If you say so.”
Jimin let his eyes close as you ran your fingers through his hair, letting the sensation lull him into a relaxed state. You massaged his legs, arms, and shoulders, feeling a bit better as he released the tension in his muscles.
Half asleep, he mumbled, “Were you singing earlier?”
Surprised, you glanced down at him to make sure he wasn’t sleep talking - you’d thought he’d already fallen asleep - and said, “Yeah. I was singing Like Crazy.”
Jimin made a little humming sound and smiled. “I heard you. You sounded so good jagi~”
“Aw thank you.” You said with a giggle, kissing his forehead.
Jimin yawned and snuggled against you. “Show me more about it in the morning?”
“Alright.”
“Night jagi, love you~”
“Love you too~”
Taehyung
“I just can’t get it jagi.” Taehyung said, letting out an exasperated sigh and slouching back in his chair. “I’m trying - I really am. I just can’t do it.”
And then he broke into tears.
Immediately you leapt out of your chair - dropping both your phone and the sheet music - and wrapped your arms around Taehyung, heart shattering upon seeing his tears.
“It’s okay sweetie.” You comforted him, rubbing circles into his back. “You’re trying, that’s all that matters. Do you want some water? Or a blanket?”
Taehyung shook his head, tugging you closer and falling into your embrace as he sobbed. “I-I just w-want you to s-stay here.”
“Of course Tae.” You said, running your fingers through his hair to soothe you. “I’m not going anyway.”
He never wanted you to see him like this, and he felt more than embarrassed upon breaking down in front of you.
After his sobbing continued for a while without pause, you began to worry. Knowing that Taehyung would be under a lot of stress due to the upcoming comeback, you’d made it your mission to try and keep everything in the house running smoothly and offer to do whatever he needed. Whether it be cuddles, some cheer up time, showering him in compliments, or running to the grocery store, you always tried your best to do whatever was asked of you.
But now you started to wonder if you hadn’t done nearly enough.
“Taehyung baby please talk to me.” You begged, tipping his head up so he would look at you. “I’m here for you. Whatever you’re feeling right now you’d don’t have go through alone.”
Taehyung turned his head away, sniffling. “I-It’s nothing jagi. I’m just tired.”
“Baby I can see it’s more than that. You can tell me anything.”
“I can’t hit this one note,” Taehyung explained tearfully, accepting the tissue you offered and blowing his nose. “I normally would be able to. It’s in my range so I don’t know why.”
“But Tae that’s not a reason to beat yourself up.” You told him, frowning. Taehyung didn’t seem convinced so you leaned forward and brushed the hair from his eyes, planting a kiss on his forehead. “Maybe your voice needs a rest.”
He shook his head. “We’re supposed to be shooting the scenes for the music video next week - and we can’t do that without a recording. Y/N I don’t want to be the reason why we fall behind schedule.” Taehyung’s lip began to tremble. “N-Namjoon hyung tried to help me but none of his tips were useful. You should’ve seen his face Y/N, he looked so disappointed. I’m going to drag everyone behind and slow down production.”
Tears streamed down his cheeks and he began crying again.
“Tae your health should be prioritized above all else.” You stated firmly, rubbing circles into his back and patting his knee. “If you need time to work on your vocals to make sure you can hit this note, then you should be given the time to be able to do that. You’re not dragging behind anyone, trust me, and if anyone gives you a hard time about it then they’ll have to go through me. Believe me when I say I can become Bang PD’s worst nightmare if he so much as asks why. And the same message is extended to Bangtan if they give you trouble about it.”
Taehyung looked up with a wobbly smile, wiping away some of his tears. “Thank you jagi, you always know what to say to make me feel better.”
“Of course.” You said, nuzzling into his chest. “I’d do anything for you.”
Taehyung rested his head on your shoulder and asked a little sheepishly. “Will you sing for me? It’ll make me feel ten times better.”
You looked in surprise. “Sing? This came out of nowhere.”
“I know but I’ve been meaning to ask you. I think I heard you singing along to Bixby one time and it made me so happy. Do it for me now?”
Taehyung peppered you in kisses and kept asking even after when you declined, stating that your singing voice wasn’t the best. He just wanted to hear it regardless.
You sighed and relented. “Alright alright. If it’ll make you feel better.” Taehyung beamed and nodded eagerly. “It will.”
With a small grunt, you began singing the chorus of Anpanman. “계속 돌려 돌려 나의 Anpan. Keep ballin', ballin', still 방탄.” You covered two more verses before stopping and looking down at Taehyung. “How was that?”
Taehyung immediately started to applaud, a smile stretching across his face and looking much happier. “You were great jagi! Why don’t we sing together?”
You raised your eyebrow. “Shouldn’t you rest your voice though…?”
Taehyung pouted. “Please jagi? I’ll be careful.”
“Fine.”
Taehyung beamed and asked, “Ready?” To which you replied, “Ready as I’ll ever be.”
And the two of you began from the beginning of Anpanman. You had to admit that it was much more fun than you’d anticipated. Even when your voice cracked and Taehyung giggled a bit, it was still worth it to see him smiling brightly at you.
“You were amazing jagi.” Taehyung said, wrapping his arms around your shoulders and burying his face in your neck. “Thanks for cheering me up.”
“Anytime, tiger.”
Jungkook
“Kookie!” You called as he pushed his way into the bedroom, running over and wrapping your arms and legs around him like a koala. Jungkook nearly fell over, caught off guard. He was used to your high energy levels but none of this sort. Wrapping his arms around your lower body so you wouldn’t fall, Jungkook asked, “What’s up?”
“Can you help me with something?”
Chuckling while ruffling your hair, Jungkook said, “Sure baby what is it?”
Excited, you hurried to explain, “I’m trying to learn the choreography for Fire and I’m struggling with a particular part, can you teach me?”
Jungkook raised his eyebrow, slightly impressed that you were trying to learn the choreography but not surprised, and nodded. With a squeal of excitement you untangled yourself from him and went to show him what you were struggling with.
“Ah,” Jungkook said once you showed him. “That’s a hard one. Here, let me show you.”
Soon your boyfriend was demonstrating the choreography, offering tips on how to execute it better once you tried to copy him.
It was no secret that Jungkook absolutely loved when you asked him for help trying to learn choreography - it was one of his favorite actives to do with you and served as a huge destresser knowing that he didn’t have to be 100% perfect in front of you.
“You’re doing great jagi~” Jungkook complimented when you danced to the pre-chorus, giggling when you beamed at him.
“Thanks.” You said, almost out of breath. “C’mon join me Kookie!”
Jungkook extended his hands and you took them, pulling you up from the bed and starting to dance with you.
“Jagi you’re like an overexcited child.” Jungkook chuckled.
You’d become distracted midway through the song and had started to dance around in a hilarious way, punching your fists into the air and hopping up and down.
You laughed with him. “Can’t help it Kookie!” And then you proceeded to yell out some gibberish, making Jungkook laugh even harder.
After getting you to focus on the Fire choreography again, you and Jungkook finished and practically fell into each others arms.
“Good job jagi.” Jungkook gave you his bunny smile and you giggled in response, leaning into him as he steadied you.
“Thanks bun.” You murmured.
Noticing how tired you were, Jungkook picked you up and set you down on the bed, and you crawled over to him, wrapping your arms around his shoulders and burying your head in his chest.
Jungkook was going to snuggle for longer, ready to just relax and let you pamper him, but then something occurred to him.
“Wait jagi, are you going to put on one of your funny shows tonight?”
“Oh yeah.” You piped up, suddenly becoming reenergized. “I’ve been preparing for the acappella version! And they’re not funny - they’re the most serious thing ever!”
Jungkook laughed. “You’re the most unserious person I’ve ever met, jagi.”
“Heyyy.” You whined, playfully swatting at his hands and initiating a mock play fight with him. “That’s not true!”
“It is too!” Jungkook insisted, letting you pin him to the bed before wrapping his arms around your torso and gently tickling you until you let go. “And what’s all this about acappella I hear, hmm?”
“I’m going to sing for you!”
“Is that right?”
“Mhm!”
“Well now you’ve really got my attention.”
Jungkook was more than curious to hear your singing voice. You always had some trick up your sleeve - some cheeky prank or a hidden talent, typically the latter. And he had not a doubt in his mind that you would be a wonderful singer.
“Baby, baby.” He said, excited, lifting you into his lap and placing his hands on your torso.
“Hm?”
“Will you give me a preview? I want to hear you sing.”
“How could I say no?” You were literally beaming at the simple request, and Jungkook’s heart fluttered at just how cute you were. “Ready? One, two, three. 다 만신창이로 취했어, 취했어. 막 욕해 길에서, 길에서.”
Jungkook almost shoved you off his lap upon hearing your voice and immediately joined in, bunny smile on full display. “나 맛이 갔지, 미친놈 같지. 다 엉망진창 livin' like 삐이.”
The two of you continued to sing together for almost the entire night. Jungkook even convinced you to record of video of you two singing. By the time you two were finished, it was almost past night and the both of you were properly worn out.
“You should’ve told me you could sing.” Jungkook eventually said, lifting your chin so you would look at him. “You sounded so beautiful. I would’ve joined your little performances in a heartbeat.”
“I was just waiting for the right time,” You murmured sleepily into his ear. “And I was a little nervous as well.”
“Aww jagi,” Jungkook cooed, engulfing you in an embrace and pressing a couple of kisses to your head. “You don’t ever have to be shy about anything around me, okay?”
You nodded sheepishly. “Okay Kookie.”
“Good.” Kook pressed another kiss to your forehead and pulled you close. You closed your eyes and soon fell asleep in his arms. “Good night princess~”
#bangtan x reader#bts fanfic#bts fic#bts x you#kpop fluff#bts x y/n#kpop fanfic#jungkook x reader#namjoon x reader#seokjin x reader#hobi x reader#taehyung x reader#jimin x reader#yoongi x reader#bts x fem!reader#bts x reader#bts ff#bts ot7#bts reactions
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Under the shadows | Kth
[First part of Four Kingdoms]
Pairing: Kim Taehyung x Reader
Genre: fantasy!au, royal!au, e2l.
Warnings: mention of death, confinement, verbal and physical abuse, angst, daddy issues, mention of torture.
Summary: Not long ago, you were the heir to one of the four great kingdoms, Silla. Your kingdom was happy and you lived in peace, or so you thought before there was a rebellion by the citizens. Your family was attacked while you were sleeping, and it was Jiwon, your personal bodyguard, who woke you up and helped you escape through a secret entrance.
That same day, in the afternoon sunlight, the heir to the neighboring kingdom, Kim Seokjin, appeared in the central square, your parents behind him, tied by the neck with a rope, ready to be exterminated like vile criminals. On the right, with an elegant bearing and serious face, stood Seokjin's brother, Kim Taehyung. That man who everyone talked about, who they said was just, who would never hurt anyone, who you had been waiting years to meet, who you admired the most in this life, was the same man who gave the order for the execution, the same man who killed your parents in front of you, and the same man who you decided that, no matter what, you would kill to avenge your family.
Coming Soon...
Series Mast.
#bts#bts fluff#bts x reader#bts x y/n#bts x fem!reader#taehyung x reader#taehyung x you#bts fanfic#bts x you#bts x oc#bts scenarios#bts escenarios#bts imaginas#bts one shot#min yoongi#jeon jungkook#kim namjoon#kim seokjin#park jimin#jung hoseok
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Waterlog || pjm (3) (teaser)
Pairing: Jimin x Reader
Other tags: Olympic Swimmer!Jimin, Ex Olympic Swimmer! Reader, Swim Coach!Reader
Genre: Strangers to Friends to Lovers!AU, Coach!AU, Swimming!AU, HEAVY Angst, Slow Burn, Mutual Pining, fluff, eventual smut, I'm so soft for these two it's crazy.
Teaser wc: 391
Synopsis: After a car accident ends her athletic career, Y/N has slowly started rebuilding her life again as a high school swim coach. That’s until she gets a request from an old friend and finds herself back in the spotlight as the new coach of Olympic swimmer, Park Jimin.
Warnings: toxic relationship (not reader and jimin), arguments, cheating (not reader and jimin), talks about previous child abuse, anxiety attack, strong language, crying, emotional abuse (not reader and jimin), mentions of depression and mental health, lots of angst in this one, finally making some progress though, age insecurity, mutual pining, lots of side character development in this one, they really are so sweet together, jimin just being the nicest boy in the world, so much PDA, physical touch is his love language 👀👀👀, more in the official posting...
Release date: April 6th, 2024 at 6pm EST
masterlist || playlist
Jimin and I said our goodbyes and I promised the blue haired boy I would call him in the morning to set up another meet up. He called it a group date, something neither Jimin nor I disagreed with, but it did make me feel queasy. Depending on how our conversation goes, we may never spend time together outside of training. I felt like I was going to vomit.
“Let me drive?” Jimin murmured as we parted ways with the couple.
I nodded, digging in my purse to find them. “Mind reader, I swear. Get out of my head, kid.”
He snickered, “Who says you weren’t in mine, granny”
The queasiness dissipated and I felt like I could breathe a little bit easier now. Being alone with Jimin had never felt this nerve wracking before, not even the first time we met, and it was hard to explain all of the thoughts and feelings going through my head. We were finally having the talk, but I had never imagined it going this way. Handing him the keys, I elbowed him in the ribs.
“Whoops,” I mocked. “You know me and my bad eyesight, kiddo.”
“Watch it,” He hissed, rubbing the spot. “Don’t want you breaking anything. You know you have frail bones.”
I laughed, “Don’t make me give you a knuckle sandwich, punk.”
Sliding into the passenger seat felt less daunting after the light hearted exchange. Still, my blood was pumping as Jimin clicked his seatbelt in place. I had no idea when the conversation would shift into murkier waters, but I needed to start thinking about what to say to him.
Denying my feelings would only make things worse, and I did not think the younger man would believe me. In fact, he would be offended that I thought he was dumb enough to get bamboozled in the first place. Lying did not seem like the right call anyway. My feelings were not something to feel ashamed about, but they were very frightening.
“When is later?”
I gasped, startled out of my thoughts. We had been driving for over ten minutes already. Time seemed to slip by when I was lost in my own head. Jimin apologized for scaring me but repeated the question once I reassured him that I was fine.
“Now,” I mumbled. “I guess later is now.”
Taglist: @ownthesunshine @screamertannie @lovelytaes-blog @pernesianparapio @tae-with-some-suga @sumzysworld @chimmisbae
Let me know if you want to be added/deleted from the taglist.
-Lex
#bts fanfiction#bts fanfic#park jimin fanfiction#park jimin fanfic#jimin x reader#jimin x you#jimin x y/n#bts x you#bts x reader#bts x fem!reader#kim seokjin#kim namjoon#kim taehyung#min yoongi#jung hoseok#jeon jungkook#bts angst#bts smut#bts scenarios#bts fluff#jimin smut#jimin scenarios#jimin fanfiction#bts#jimin angst#jimin fluff#jimin fanfic
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Strange||Chapter Three
𝐏𝐚𝐢𝐫𝐢𝐧𝐠: 𝐏𝐨𝐥𝐲!𝐨𝐭𝟕 × 𝐫𝐞𝐚𝐝𝐞𝐫 (𝐉𝐢𝐧 𝐟𝐨𝐜𝐮𝐬)
𝐒𝐲𝐧𝐨𝐩𝐬𝐢𝐬: 𝐘𝐨𝐮 𝐚𝐧𝐝 𝐉𝐢𝐧 𝐠𝐫𝐞𝐰 𝐮𝐩 𝐢𝐧 𝐚𝐧 𝐨𝐫𝐩𝐡𝐚𝐧𝐚𝐠𝐞 𝐭𝐨𝐠𝐞𝐭𝐡𝐞𝐫. 𝐖𝐢𝐭𝐡 𝐧𝐨 𝐩𝐚𝐫𝐞𝐧𝐭𝐬 𝐨𝐫 𝐟𝐚𝐦𝐢𝐥𝐲 𝐭𝐨 𝐭𝐚𝐤𝐞 𝐜𝐚𝐫𝐞 𝐨𝐟 𝐲𝐨𝐮, 𝐲𝐨𝐮 𝐛𝐨𝐭𝐡 𝐥𝐨𝐨𝐤𝐞𝐝 𝐚𝐟𝐭𝐞𝐫 𝐞𝐚𝐜𝐡𝐨𝐭𝐡𝐞𝐫. 𝐘𝐨𝐮 𝐟𝐞𝐝 𝐨𝐧𝐞 𝐚𝐧𝐨𝐭𝐡𝐞𝐫, 𝐜𝐥𝐨𝐭𝐡𝐞𝐝 𝐨𝐧𝐞 𝐚𝐧𝐨𝐭𝐡𝐞𝐫, 𝐜𝐫𝐢𝐞𝐝 𝐰𝐢𝐭𝐡 𝐞𝐚𝐜𝐡 𝐨𝐭𝐡𝐞𝐫. 𝐁𝐮𝐭 𝐢𝐭 𝐚𝐥𝐥 𝐜𝐡𝐚𝐧𝐠𝐞𝐝 𝐰𝐡𝐞𝐧 𝐡𝐞 𝐰𝐚𝐬 𝐞𝐯𝐞𝐧𝐭𝐮𝐚𝐥𝐥𝐲 𝐚𝐝𝐨𝐩𝐭𝐞𝐝 𝐛𝐲 𝐚 𝐥𝐨𝐯𝐢𝐧𝐠 𝐟𝐚𝐦𝐢𝐥𝐲, 𝐥𝐞𝐚𝐯𝐢𝐧𝐠 𝐲𝐨𝐮 𝐚𝐥𝐥 𝐚𝐥𝐨𝐧𝐞.𝐖𝐡𝐚𝐭 𝐡𝐚𝐩𝐩𝐞𝐧𝐬 𝐰𝐡𝐞𝐧 𝐲𝐨𝐮’𝐫𝐞 𝐧𝐨𝐰 𝐚 𝐠𝐫𝐨𝐰𝐧, 𝐬𝐮𝐜𝐜𝐞𝐬𝐬𝐟𝐮𝐥 𝐚𝐝𝐮𝐥𝐭 𝐰𝐨𝐫𝐤𝐢𝐧𝐠 𝐰𝐢𝐭𝐡 𝐡𝐢𝐦 𝐚𝐧𝐝 𝐡𝐢𝐬 𝐬𝐢𝐱 𝐛𝐨𝐲𝐟𝐫𝐢𝐞𝐧𝐝𝐬?
𝐆𝐞𝐧𝐫𝐞: 𝐈𝐝𝐨𝐥 𝐀𝐮, 𝐚𝐧𝐠𝐬𝐭, 𝐬𝐥𝐨𝐰 𝐛𝐮𝐫𝐧, 𝐞𝐯𝐞𝐧𝐭𝐮𝐚𝐥 𝐬𝐦𝐮𝐭
𝐏𝐫𝐞𝐯||𝐌𝐚𝐬𝐭𝐞𝐫𝐥𝐢𝐬𝐭||𝐍𝐞𝐱𝐭
PLEASE READ: I can't lie... It took me a minute to figure out where I wanted to go with this story- I CRIED! I hate that it took me so long to get this to you guys :(... Hopefully the updates will be a little more consistent. ALSO I did revamp the banner a bit- the other one just doesn't fit the direction I’m about to take with this fic so BE READY!
thanks for all the love <3
UNEDITED
Not once, did it ever occur to you to do a DNA test. You grew up in an orphanage, so obviously you didn’t really know your parents. Honestly, you had no reason to know them, to know if they're dead or alive. You had Jin. And when he left, you had Jae. That was enough for you.
But now knowing that your father was out there, and that he knew Jin, made you curious. You weren’t really curious about your father, more so your mother. But, how did he know Jin? Phone tapping? Listening to your private conversations? Is that something that your potential father is capable of?
After ending the phone conversation with Jin, you both agreed to meet at a discrete location. He didn’t have to say the usual spot, you already knew.
A tree behind the orphanage, now old and abandoned. Someone could’ve spotted you from a mile away, but you didn’t care. It’s not like you were famous or anything. Unlike Jin, who showed up in a black zip up hoodie with a mask. He looked like he was about to rob someone.
“Dude, you look like you’re gonna steal my purse or something”, you teased. “We’re literally meeting behind an abandoned building. I don’t think anyone is here.”
“You never know, especially with your dad.”
“How do I know you’re telling the truth about this whole dad thing? This could just be another lie you’re spinning to get me to forgive you.”
He sighed. “At this point, I have no reason to lie. And this is serious, Ynie.”
You climbed your way up the old oak tree, sitting on one of the limbs. “Where is he? Do you know? He shook his head.
“No, and even if I did I wouldn’t tell you”, Jin snarked. “He is dangerous, deadly.”
“I don’t care, Jin. He’s my father. You can’t protect me from this one.”
He climbed up the tree also, claiming a spot next to you on the limb. He laid his head on your shoulder as you sat in silence.
Just like old times.
“You still lied to me. Don’t expect me to forgive you that easily”, you reminded him. Yes, hearing about your father puts things in a different perspective, but the principle still stands. His loyalties should lie with you, not your potential father.
“I’m really sorry”, he apologized. “And I’ll never forgive myself for what I’ve done, but I really hope we can try to move past this, together. I’m not saying that things have to go back to the way they used to be. You’re an adult now, so you don’t need me to look after you anymore. But maybe we can start over? Clean the slate?”
You smiled, on the brink of tears. “Maybe. I have missed my best friend a little.”
“A little?” Jin teased. “I know it didn’t seem like it, but there was never a single day I wasn’t thinking about you, missing you.”
His hand reached your cheek, wiping away the tears. God, memories were a bitch. All you can think about is old times, but the good times, not the bad ones.
“You know we’re gonna have to tell them, right?” He tucked a strand of hair behind your ear. “They’ll get suspicious if we’re suddenly the best of friends.”
You nodded. “I’ll tell them, don’t worry.” You both agreed it was better if you sat down and told his boyfriends the truth. Jin doesn’t always have a way with words, especially when their eyes pierced through his skull like daggers.
“I want to meet him, Jinnie”, you whispered. “I want to meet my father.”
The next week went smoothly. You and Jin began to reacclimate to being in each other's presence. The bangtan meetings were more productive, considering you actually showed up this time. The beginning was a little rocky, though.
“Well, look who decided to show up?” The leader complained. “You missed– I don't know— about three meetings!”
“I’m really sorry”, you apologized, giving a formal 90 degree bow. Jin laughed at your teasing.
“This is the last meeting before we start promotions. I couldn’t miss this.”
You all discussed the boring partnership mumbo jumbo. You didn’t really pay attention half the time. You mostly texted Jin, in need of a distraction.
“Anything else to add Miss Kim?” Their advisors asked you.
“Yes actually”, you replied. “But it’s actually more of a private matter. Could I ask you all to step outside for a quick second? Everyone except Bangtan, of course.”
The manager gave you a quick glare before obeying your orders, grabbing their belongings and walking out of the office.
“Is she about to murder us?” Tae jumped up out of his chair, making his way to the door. “I’m too young to die!”
Jin rolled his eyes. “Yah! Would you stop being so dramatic and get back in your seat?”
You laughed. “I promise, I have no ulterior motives. I just want to apologize.”
You could tell that obviously wasn’t what they were expecting. They looked at each other, all wondering why they weren’t being chewed out by you for being a bunch of dickheads.
“I realize that everything that happened wasn’t expected, and I never meant to uproot anyone’s life. To be honest, I didn’t even know who you guys were before this partnership— well besides Jin. And the reason Jin was keeping secrets is because I told him to. But I want to be the one to tell you everything.”
The room went silent. It was like everyone was on the edge of their seats, like a movie hitting the climax.
“Ynie, you don’t have to do this right now”, Jin assured you. “We can do this later, maybe when we’re all more comfortable with each other.”
You shook your head. “It’s okay. I need to do this now, or I’ll never do it. If I’m gonna ask for your help, you need to know the full story.”
“Help with what?” Joon questioned. “What do you need us for?”
“I need help finding my father.”
It was a silent ride back home for the boys. With everything going on in their heads, after everything you had told them, it was hard not to ponder over it.
Even when they got back to the dorms, it was quiet. Jimin couldn’t help but beat himself up over his last actions, the way he first treated you. Looking at it from his point of view, you could see why he acted the way he did. But he still felt foolish for thinking that a person like you would be out to get him, to take what’s his. They all sat in the living room, stuck in their heads.
“We need to talk about this”, Jungkook said, breaking the silence.
“You’re right”, Hoseok agreed. “I think we should help her. Good karma, you know?”
Jin shook his head. “You don’t understand. I’ve met him before. He is dangerous. I don’t want him anywhere near her.”
“Okay, but that’s not your decision to make, Jin”, Yoongi argued with his arms crossed. “As a good friend, you need to just support her decisions and help her when she makes mistakes. You can’t make decisions for her.”
Joon agreed. “Yoon is right. Keep her from this and you might lose her entirely... again.”
“Then what do I do?” Jin asked desperately. “Just let her get hurt?”
Jimin consoled his exasperated boyfriend, lighting massaging his shoulders. “Yes, and be there for her when it happens-if it happens.”
All of those years he spent protecting you, raising you. To be honest, he missed it. But you’re not a little girl anymore. You're a grown woman, capable of making your own decisions. And he is a grown man, responsible and mature.
“Okay”, Jin agreed. “Let’s help find her father.”
“Are you seriously gonna hang out with the same people that hated you like two days ago?”
You were getting ready to have lunch with the boys. You invited Jae to come along, wanting an icebreaker in case things are still awkward. He was helping you get ready in your lovely walk-in closet.
“We are all mature adults, Jae. Get over—”
“And let me also remind you, that Jimin guy embarrassed you in front of millions of people! They're all a bunch of dicks.”
“My favorite”, you teased. He threw an old t-shirt at you.
“You have the humor of a teenage boy.” Jae picked a shirt hanging up in your closet, handing it to you.
“That one, so we can match!”
“Like a couple?” You asked sarcastically. “How cute!”
He snatched the shirt back. “Never mind. Jin probably wouldn’t want us to match anyway.”
You rolled your eyes. “Why would he care what I wear?”
“Because he’s totally crushing on you, him and his boyfriends— maybe not Jimin though.”
"You're delusional", you scoffed. "There's seven people in that relationship. I bet they're not looking for anymore."
"Whatever you say... But that Namjoon guy was definitely checking you out at the awards show."
Another shirt was thrown across the closet, and with that drawer of socks, but even after the conversation ended you wondered…
Was what Jae said true?
Taglist (if @ is purple I can’t tag you :()
@scuzmunkie @moon-cupcakes @quillan-pie @uarmyhore @xjiminsthighsx @dreamamubarak @exfolitae @snookerbooker @bex-tk1 @prettybitxc @frieschan @whipwhoops @lulu-83 @minaaathings @demarie04 @svnbangtansworld @juju-227592 @bangtantxts @blancflms @girl-nahh @kameko-ko @cutiethecupcake @worcesheshestershiresauce @irishhbamb
Lmk if I forgot to add you or you would like to be added <3
#kpop#bts#bts fanfic#bts imagines#kpop smut#bts x reader#bts smut#kim seokjin#bts fanfction#jeon jungguk#park jimin#bts series#poly!bts x reader#bts fic#bts ot7#kim namjoon#kim taehyung#jung hoseok#bts yoongi#bts jimin#min suga#min yoogni#poly ot7#bangtan#bts taehyung#idol#idol au#bts x fem!reader#bts jhope
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Bangtan Host Club Chapter Three
Genre: BTS Ot7xf!Reader, Poly!AU, Fluff, Romance, Crack-ish, Eventual Smut.
W/C: 2592
Summary: Tired of your boring mundane life? Become an exclusive member of The Bangtan Host Club™ today and let 7 charming men help you out.
Warnings: This chapter is rated PG13, but future chapters may include Mature Themes. The reader goes through the five stages of grief. 😔
Disclaimer: Please do not copy/translate or cross-post my work. The tag list is open. Just DM or send an ask to be included.
A/N: Hi! Sorry for the long wait. Thank you guys so much for being patient. 💕 This chapter isn't edited very much, so I am sorry for any dumb mistakes. Please do send my any feedback! 👉🏻👈🏻
Also, now that we have met everyone, here is the cast:
Kim Namjoon as “Takashi Morinozuka”
Kim Seokjin as “Tamaki Suoh”
Min Yoongi as "Umehito Nekozawa"
Jung Hoseok as "Mitsukuni Haninozuka”
Park Jimin as “Kyoya Ootori”
Kim Taehyung as “Kaoru Hitachiin”
Jung Jungkook as "Hikaru Hitachiin”
Congrats to everyone who guessed the right picks lmaooo! I had so much fun writing Chapter 3, I hope you enjoy it. See you sooooon! <3
Chapter 2 << Chapter 3 >>
You can count the number of times you have felt such unbridled mortification on one hand. One was when you were playing the Cowardly Lion in the Wizard of Oz showcase during your elementary school talent show and, just as you got on the stage, could not for the life of you stop the unrelenting hiccups out of performance anxiety. Or, that one time in middle school, when you spilled all of your half-digested breakfast on the shoes of that one senior guy you had a crush on because you had a bad stomach flu.
This, you internally scream at yourself, is probably the most dread you have felt in all your adult years.
The receipt you can not avert your eyes from shakes between the tips of your index finger and thumb. Is it your hand that is shaking? You really can’t tell. Something bitter twists in your chest that makes you repeat as you squint your eyes at Hoseok. “What the fuck?!”
He looks at you stunned, but definitely not unprepared. He sighs deeply as he tries to console you, “I am here to help you with any concerns you might have.”
You snap your head to look at the rest of the people in the Cafe- Club- whatever this place is. There are various degrees of horrified looks on the faces of the other- are they supposed to be patrons or customers or-? God this is so confusing. You let out the longest sigh and your other hand, the one without that malignant piece of paper, rubs across your face.
“There is no way in hell I am paying this.” you declare, looking right back at Hoseok. Just minutes ago you would have never thought of him as someone you’d have talked to in this agitated manner but also minutes ago, he wasn’t a person who claimed you owed his establishment all your family assets and then some.
There is a loud scraping of a chair behind you and before you can turn to see who it is, Seokjin’s gentle voice is carrying through the room. “I am deeply apologetic to our guests tonight but due to unforeseen circumstances, the club will reschedule your time with the hosts at a later date. Kindly grant us an excuse this once.”
There are murmurs and hushed whispers behind you. The obnoxious sound of various people shuffling footsteps toward the exit amidst the awkward silence that had followed your outburst is acting as the fuel to the simmering rage in your chest. You feel more than see the icy glares people direct at you for ruining what was probably supposed to be a night of entertainment and good company for them. The thought makes you shudder as embarrassment crawls up your spine. You fix your gaze on your tapping shoe against the plush carpet and cross your arms in front of your chest.
“Now,” Seokjin continues once it is only you and the other hosts remaining, “What might be the issue, beautiful?”
You inhale deeply before you turn to him, expecting him to look irritated by you. Instead, his eyes are full of mirth as he lifts an amused eyebrow at you. His hands rest on the table in front of him, palms down as he leans his tall frame forward. It irks you.
“I said I am not paying that ridiculous amount for a coffee I did not even finish. You can not make me.”
Seokjin’s lips form a small o shape as he pretends to sincerely consider your words. “It is not the coffee you are paying for though, darling. That is complimentary.” He says it like it is obvious. You feel a familiar twitch in your temple. “You are paying for the additional services you have utilized this evening.”
You can feel yourself seething but for the sake of not becoming liable to any property damage, you reign your fury. “I will do no such thing. I had no idea what kind of an establishment this is.”
“We keep that in mind.” Taehyung intervenes, his dark brown eyes sparkling at you intently. “Besides the several, and might I remind you, very prominently displayed boards with our club trademark, the first visits to the guests are usually not chargeable, a free trial if you will.”
“You, however, took four of us with you, to your apartment no less, and Namjoon Hyung even did locksmithing for you.” Jungkook adds from where he is standing next to Taehyung. He smirks at you, and it takes everything in you from banging your fist on the nearest table.
“He offered!” You argue, wincing at the sound of your voice.
“He is supposed to. Accepting is completely beholden to you.” Seokjin adds with a tilt of his head to the left that you can only assume to be satirizing. “The club hosts offer services to the guests and if they choose to accept them, they are liable to the charges.” he says, shrugging those ridiculously broad shoulders of his nonchalantly.
You scoff at this, your glare now directed at Namjoon, who to his credit looks like a big puppy that has been reprimanded by his owner for bringing the newspaper in the mornings, only slightly covered in drool.
Your shoulders slump in defeat. They are not wrong, you think. When you enter a place that offers you any kind of service, and you make use of said service, you are, as a consumer obliged to pay the fee for that service. “I can not pay that amount. I do not have that kind of money.” At this, the room falls into silence. God, these hosts must earn so much that the concept of living paycheque to paycheque must be alienating to them.
After what seemed like an eternity, when it was probably only six minutes tops, Jimin who had been sitting on his chair quite comfortably so far takes an exaggerated inhale before intoning, “Well, we might be able to offer you something to help with that.”
You look at him sheepishly and he continues, “If you can not pay us in terms of funds, pay us in service.”
What the hell is that even supposed to mean? Is this like some sort of hidden camera prank? Are Pauly and Vinny about to come burst down the doors as a cameraman pushes his gigantic camcorder in your face yelling “You just got MTV pranked!”
Your bewildered expression must have been too obvious because Jimin adds “I am serious. Work for us.”
Now you are even more confused. Work for them? As an employee? You can not be a host. You have a day job. A job that feels like going through the depths of hell every day, but a job nonetheless. Your tongue twists in your mouth as you try to swallow saliva down your dry throat. “What does that mean?”
“You said you worked at LinkSol, right? By Hwan Sana?” Jimin asks and it's as if he just talked about Voldemort judging by the dramatic gasp from Seokjin’s lips and his hand on his chest, clutching pearls. “You should come work for us, as our manager. Trust me, you’d be doing yourself a favor too.”
“That’s your solution? Servitude compulsory labor?” you resign. “Do you think we are in the 17th century?” Change is not a friend to you. Yes, your job is torture but you’ve grown accustomed to the routine. This is asking a lot of you.
“Why, you got something better?” he counters. “We can not waive off your fee, you can not pay it to us. We have an open position and you are at a shitty job. The way I see it, there are no losing parties.”
“You will get to work stable hours that are open to negotiation. We will pay you a salary, also negotiable, from which we will deduct a monthly interest that will serve as your payment.” Jimin pulls out his phone and taps away for a few seconds before humming to himself and adding, “It will take you about 18 months to pay off everything and then you are free to discuss the position as you wish.”
18 months? That does not seem like enough time to pay off everything, does it? Exactly how much are they planning to give you as a salary? Before you can ask, you bite your tongue, wise words from your mother at your college graduation dinner resounding in your head, “Never let an employer know you were expecting less payment for your hard work than what they offered you. They must recognize some worth in you that you may be oblivious to.”
You furrow your eyebrows, trying to paint the most corporate expression on your face as you return a single nod toward Jimin. “That seems reasonable, but I would like to discuss everything from the profile and my responsibilities openly before deciding.” Jimin presses his thick lips in a flat line, nodding his agreement.
“Of course, take your time. We can set up a formal meeting anytime you want this week,” he informs.
“And,” you interrupt, suddenly remembering how you got yourself in this position in the first place, “I want it all in writing. No more errors in intentions.”
There is a cough from behind you by Yoongi which sounds suspiciously like a chocked back chuckle. Jimin too bites the inside of his cheek, eyelashes fluttering as he nods again. “We will make sure.”
“Now that all that is over can we please just have something to eat Hobi Hyung? I am starving here.” Jungkook sighs dramatically. “And you, come sit with us, we are not working anymore and I know you are exhausted so you might as well eat now.”
You eye him suspiciously. The other boys all walk up to his table as Namjoon and Hoseok go back toward the kitchen. Even though you trudge over to his table, you can’t help but snark at him, “Would this not be added to my debt to you?”
“Fiesty.” he grins and pulls out a chair for you. “And no. Like I said, we are off work so consider this just a dinner with your future colleagues.”
You hum dejectedly as you sit at the table with your arms still crossed over your chest. This evening has been a year’s worth of events for you and you seriously can not keep your head up anymore. So you lay your head on the soft white satin tablecloth and groan mutely to yourself.
“It won’t be that bad working here, pretty girl. You’ll see.” Taehyung says softly from where he sits beside you. You raise your head at him, without straightening your back completely, and are surprised to find him looking at you with no more amusement, just what seems like empathy. Your heart betrays you by fluttering. Why do all of them have to be so attractive? It would be so easy to hate them right now if that wasn’t going on. Life is so unfair.
Seokjin’s hand rests on your shoulder giving it a slight squeeze. “You are so knackered. What were they making you do at LinkSol?”
It is a rhetorical question, you know that, but you’d just love to dump all of your exhausting work stories on someone if only you had the energy to do that. So you just whine noncommittally and put a pin on telling those stories some other day. After all, they are going to be your “colleagues” as they said. Seokjin takes your palm in his and gently starts to massage your hand. His large hand engulfs yours as his thumbs press into the center of your palm. You give him a confused stare.
“What?” he questions softly.
“What are you doing?” you ask, pointing your nose down to where he is still caressing your hand.
“What does it look like I am doing? I am helping you.” he says it like it is the most obvious thing you could have asked him.
“Don’t think so deeply about it, sweetheart,” Jungkook says as he grins softly at you, “Hyung has a habit of doing things like that. Just let it be, he means no harm.”
“Yeah, but he is annoying as hell.” Taehyung chips in.
This makes a scowl appear on Seokjin’s face. “I taught you better than that, you shameless brat.”
“You didn’t teach me shit.” Taehyung gruffs, although he does seem to quiet down after that.
Jimins rolls his eyes at the both of them and diverts his attention back on you. “I have a better question. I get it about Jin Hyung, he gives off that vibe,” which you think is a slight hidden in the guise of a statement towards Seokjin, “but you didn’t think that we were acting… unusually, around you?”
To be honest, yes. It was definitely strange how these incredibly attractive men were the embodiment of cats with a ball of yarn with you, but that is the point. You were so distracted by the way they looked and how they were very obviously flirting with you that you never even questioned why. You weren’t going to tell them that though. How flustering that idea is, makes a sheen of sweat break out on your hairline. “N-no. I didn’t think of it as anything out of the ordinary.”
It seems like you picked the wrong choice because an impish grin curves along Jimin’s lips as his eyes linger on yours. “So it is a normal occurrence for you. People just flirt with you wherever you go?”
When he puts it like that, it makes your cheeks burn. It is further compounded by Taehyung who admonishes Jimin, “C’mon, Hyung! Stop teasing the poor girl.” He gives you a smirk and a dramatic once-over, before adding “I mean look at her. I wouldn’t dream otherwise”
The way his gaze is suddenly heated makes you choke on your own spit a little. Your heart stutters in your ribcage. Even Yoongi who has been decidedly quiet this entire time leans forward on the table from across you. “Cute.” he mutters, his sharp eyes boring straight into you.
Jimin sighs a deep breath. He plays with the button on the cuff of his shirt as he looks down at the table, “I am not questioning it. I just don’t think I like the idea too much.”
What was that about being “off work”? Aren’t they supposed to not be this charming anymore? Then why are they so intent on making you feel so bashful?! Before you can put too much thought into the matter, the doors to the kitchen open, and Namjoon and Hoseok carry with them two large trays full of food and coffee. As soon as the trays are placed on the table, Hoseok wraps his arms around you, pressing his chest to the back of your chair.
“I am sorry that this is how things turned out, angel.” he whines and Namjoon gives you a small smile as he takes a seat beside Seokjin, “Look on the bright side though. Now we can share all the sweets we want and play together.” he giggles. You smile gratefully at his optimism.
Maybe it won’t be that bad, you think as Jungkook passes you a plate of sandwiches. They seem like nice people, they are allegedly paying you a much better salary than you get at your job, and if nothing else, at least they are a nicer view instead of the drab walls of your office.
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