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#jin x y/n
jinkookspencil · 4 months
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a way to wake | ksj
you're fast asleep and seokjin has to wake you up... an old method he used on his friend eventually comes to mind
description/tags/note: seokijn drabble / fluff + suggestive / established relationship / i had this idea in my head for a while, ever since i found out how jin used to wake up jungkook when they were younger... and i ended up writing the whole thing while stuck in traffic on a random afternoon / i am actively working on til you make it 2 whenever i have the time! i'm glad i took my time with it, i improved it in all this time and am still thinking of ways to improve it little by little / also, i often get ideas or scenarios in my head that could be mini pieces, not even a drabble - some are barely even 500 words. would you guys be interested in stuff like that? lmk!! / anyways, enjoy!! / edit: i edited this fic to make it even more suggestive. they both hint at yn wanting jin to wake her up by touching her.
wc: ~1.3k words
Seokjin didn’t have it in him. You were sleeping so peacefully beside him, as you had through all seven of your alarms, likely finally getting in a good rest after many sleepless nights… and he had to disturb it?
He knew he didn’t really have a choice - you were already running late. It wasn’t going to be a problem for Seokjin really, after you both showered, it’d only take him a couple more minutes at most to change into his suit. You, on the other hand, always needed some extra time to get ready, and that ‘extra’ time was getting shorter and shorter the more he let you sleep.
You’d want him to wake you up, he knew that for certain, as well as the fact that you would probably scold him as well as yourself for your sleeping in. That reminder is what finally got him to nudge and rub your shoulder.
“Jagiya?”
He repeats the action numerous times, raising the volume of his voice every time, but still, you slept.
“Honey,” he calls with a laugh, tickling your side, belly, and thigh. Your elbow twitches once, but never again despite him repeating the action over and over again. “We need to leave soon. You need to wake up now, darling.”
Nothing.
He gets up to pull open a bit of the curtains, letting sunlight stream in and disrupt the darkness of your bedroom.
Still, nothing.
Frustrated now, Seokjin pulls out his phone and quickly takes a photo of you sleeping - just for himself - before opening up the music app. He plays clips of several songs, and all you do is wince, sleeping through them as you did your alarms.
“Are you faking it?” he asks aloud to your sleeping body. “Jagi… if you’re faking sleep, I swear I won’t eat you out tonight. I’m serious.”
Nothing.
That definitely would’ve done it if you were faking sleep. Really, you had no reason to fake it - you'd panic at the mere thought of running late - but Seokjin couldn’t eliminate the possibility entirely. You could be a bit of a brat at times.
He half considers physically pulling you out of bed, throwing a plushie at you, or emptying a water bottle on you, until he remembers a failsafe. A way that couldn’t hurt you like manhandling could, nor anger you with wet pajamas and sheets.
Jungkook’s way.
Seokjin giggles to himself at the thought. He had never tried it on any of his exes in the past, just Jungkook, really. It wasn't uncommon for boys to do such a thing at that age, especially when they were playfully roughhousing, which, with Jungkook, happened every day and at any time of day. Seokjin always had the edge by starting off Jungkook's days just like that - it always did the trick... And considering the other similarities you shared with Seokjin's younger friend, it wasn’t something to dismiss entirely.
Slowly, he turns you until you’re lying entirely on your back against the mattress, facing the ceiling with shut eyes. He moves from his position next to you until he’s over you, straddling your body with a knee planted on either side of your hips. He never took on this position with Jungkook of course, and almost started regretting it already - you felt too good.
“Jagi,” he whispers, pulling away the blanket from your body and letting his hand graze the skin at your collarbone and your stomach by the hem of your pajama top. He kisses your neck once, calling your name. It was the final chance he'd give you before he’d pull the trigger.
And you didn’t budge.
He sighs in defeat, not holding back his smile any longer when he sees your hardened nipples peak through the thin fabric of your top. Ready. Just for him.
With his index finger and thumb on both hands, Seokjin pinches and fiddles with your raised buds for mere seconds before you shoot up, finally awake.
“Wh?! W..what the fuck?! Jin!” you yell, wriggling underneath your fiancé’s body as he laughs, tumbling over you.
“I can’t believe that worked,” he says between his giggles, stopping only when you lazily reach towards his chest. “YA! I only did that to wake you up. You slept through your alarms, bub. We’re running late.”
“WHAT?!” you yell, pushing him off of you and hurriedly searching for your phone. “Why didn’t you wake me sooner?
“I TRIED!” he protests, getting off the bed. “You slept like a rock. Who knew squeezing your nipples would finally do it? It’s what I used to do to Jungkook when we shared a dorm. Though, of course, I used to twist his nipples to the point where he was certain I detached them from his body somehow. I tried handling you with care, princess.”
“Couldn’t you have used your fingers somewhere else, Seokjin? A bit lower perhaps? You know, something Jungkook doesn’t have? Something you could only possibly do with your girlfriend?”
Seokjin stares at you. Despite the fact that you’d looked delectable asleep and under him already, the thought never occurred to him. Of course the thought wouldn’t occur to him. This wasn’t a conversation you had had together and he hadn’t gotten your consent or any hint that it’d be something you would want. Unless of course, he had been the reason you refused to wake up… Seokjin’s mind wanders with a desperate need within him to have the conversation then and there, knowingly unprepared if you’d admitted to it all. Wanting to be woken up that way. A dream, perhaps. They might have just forget the event altogether…
He begins following you around the room with pleas for a moment to talk, but you don’t turn back for a second until it is to do the exact opposite of handling him with care - dragging and pushing him into the bathroom.
Seokjin watches as you undress, doing the same and half hoping for a quickie, considering your eagerness. He almost felt his length begin to harden, but soon you’re pushing him once more, into the tepid shower with a loofah in hand. He tries to put his thought away for now, caring for your body in another way he felt so privileged to do. To maximize efficiency, you wash yourselves and one another before going about your routines at double the pace. Seokjin’s entirely dressed in minutes, save for his suit jacket, while you were still getting ready, wearing a lingerie set underneath a robe. Extra time for you, and extra time for him to admire you.
“Help me with my dress,” you command him, stepping into a dress he promptly zips up, but not before he drinks up the sight of you in brown silk and lace underneath. Stood behind you, he watches as you adorn yourself with jewelry but can’t stop his hand from snaking over your waist, softly cupping your breasts over the fabric of your dress. You don’t react save for a sharp inhale, continuing to adorn your look. You’re so stunning it almost brings him to his knees. He’d happily allow his body to get there, too, kneeling to tease you at the very least and at most, sneaking his head underneath your dress and pulling down your underwear - just for a taste. But instead, he nudges his head in the crook of your neck - softly kissing along the chain of your necklace. “Tell me, honey… were you dreaming of me? Is that why you didn’t want to wake up?”
You roll your eyes, playfully swatting Seokjin’s hand on your waist, his fake arrogance replaced with a wide smile in seconds. “We need to leave.”
“I made a promise,” Seokjin says, wearing his jacket. “While you were asleep. I made a promise.”
“Oh?” you question, spraying perfume on the two of you. The final touch.
“I said that if you were faking sleeping through your alarms, I wouldn’t eat you out tonight.”
The promise makes you stop in your tracks towards the front door, Seokjin getting there first with an intrigued expression on his face when he looks back. “Since you weren’t faking it, that means I have to do it. And since you slept through the many different ways I tried waking you up… I guess it seems I gotta get you to do something else.... gotta get you somewhere.... many different ways tonight…. Oh, and of course, you won't be faking it this time around as well.”
He’s unsure if the redness in your cheeks is heat flooding your system or makeup he simply hadn’t noticed a minute prior. As you make your way towards your fiancee, you see smugness only slightly present on his face, overshadowed by sincerity - that of a genuine promise. Your hands fiddle with Seokjin’s tie before resting on his chest.
“I didn’t realize dreams could manifest into reality that quickly.”
“I knew it,” Seokjin smiles, kissing your hand as his ears go red. The idea of you actually having a wet dream about him this long into your relationship… the fact that you’d dream of him and his body pleasuring yours, after only hours apart in sleep… it sent him into a frenzy.
“I mean, I know I’ll hear it tonight, but I kind of wish you’d been moaning my name in your sleep…”
“Well, you didn’t see my pajama shorts, did you?,” you whisper, flicking Seokjin’s nipple over his shirt. He winces but is quick to disregard the pain - his face flushed, and he suddenly doesn’t know what to do with his hands, trying to reach for your waist, thigh, or ass - you push him away.
“It was a very vivid dream, honey. Don’t you worry… I’ll tell you all the many different ways I want it. The ways you did it… And tomorrow, wake me up like it never ended.”
There it was.
“Can we stay in? We’re late already,” Seokjin whines. “We can get a head start. Morning to morning…” He feeling his knees buckling at the thought, slowly trying to pull you closer to him in persuasion. You don’t budge and open the door instead.
“You know we can’t…. Now’s your time to dream of me.”
The hunger within him only grew, already fantasising of the of the night to come. Now, he was in competition with himself and he’d make sure your reality is far better than anything you could dream of.
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wildestdreamsblog · 1 year
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Hiraeth: 1
Pairing: Kim Seokjin x Reader
Summary: You had always been his, and no one could take you away from him. Idol!AU
Warnings: Yandere behavior, Obsessiveness, Possessiveness, Manipulative behavior, Slight age gap, Murder intention, Mention of death, Sexual themes, If you’re not 18+ please, PLEASE, do not interact. Be mindful of the warnings. Let me know if I miss anything.
A/N: I’m in my Jin-I-miss-you era and I’m taking u all with me. Idk yet if this will be two-shot. Do tell me your thoughts 💜
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Masterlist
“I’m going to marry you.”
The nine-year old Seokjin lost his concentration upon hearing your declaration. He blinked, and all of a sudden, the game signaled that he lost. His hold on the game controller slackened. It gently hit the carpeted floor. He hated losing. It was game over all because of you.
“I’m never gonna marry you,” he said so meanly that he was sure you would finally stop following him around. But the five year-old you merely grinned, several teeth missing and announced that he would marry you. You were sure of it.
“Will you stop following me?!” Jin seethed, glaring at your small form as you didn’t mind his anger and continued walking behind him eagerly. Jin was at the stage where all he wanted was to move, to burn the excess energy. He was into sports lately. And because he was fond of it, you were, too. Wherever he went, you’d follow. It was like he had another shadow besides his own.
It was annoying.
But it was also comforting.
On times when he’d fall, knees and hands bruised or bloodied, there you were, quietly telling him it was going to be fine, gently washing the blood off of him. You were always there to help him stand up again. You always carried around cute bandaids. He liked to think that you carried it for him.
He was twelve now, and you still followed him around. He even told his mother about you, but she merely giggled and told him that you were the cutest little girl she had ever seen. He should have known she wouldn’t side with him. After all, your father was his father’s best friend. This was why you were always around…and he was used to your presence that when you couldn’t attend some of his family’s event, he would sulked. But the young Seokjin couldn’t wrap his head around the reason why he hated when you were gone.
Yet, he was irritated by your presence.
He saw you as a nuisance, but you saw him as someone who was larger than life. In your young mind, he was the epitome of perfect. He looked like a prince, and his family treated him as such. You wanted nothing but to be his princess. And so, you spent your younger days following him around. You saw him through all the stages in his life, until he became that lanky, yet sporty teenager.
He was fifteen and you were eleven. You knew he was even more irritated with you than glad that you were with his family during their vacations. His mom treated you like her own daughter, saying that you were the daughter she never had, and you were only too glad to have a mother figure. On some vacations, Jin would be kind and played with you with the sand. On some vacations, he would watch out for you whenever you strayed too far on the sea.
On some days though, he scoffed at your presence.
Like right now.
You looked at the entrance of your school with mild confusion, your strides faltering as you realized it was Jin who was waiting for you outside the school premises. He was cooly leaning against their car, their driver sitting on the car, waving at you with a smile on his face. But Jin looked angry.
“Who’s that?” Your close friend and classmate, Chan, asked you. “Why does he look mad?”
Yes. Why was Jin mad?
Perhaps, Jin was too impatient to wait for you because not a moment later, his legs that you noticed were becoming longer as the years passed by brought him faster to you. He stood in front of you, towering over you and Chan. And was he glaring at him?
“Jin!” You gushed in excitement, your adoration to him apparent that you were sure your eyes were gleaming with unrestrained happiness. “Why are you here?”
He turned to you after scaring the poor boy, “Your father asked me to pick you up from school. Our families are going to have dinner together,” he replied in a tense voice. He didn’t even let you speak when he grabbed the backpack that you were wearing, and dragged it to the waiting car.
You didn’t get the chance to say your goodbye to your friend.
Inside the car, his eyes were trained on the window, watching the passing cars. He was pouting, his lips protruding adorably. And there you were, sitting beside him as you nonchalantly ate your candy whilst talking animatedly to their driver.
“Does your father know you have a boyfriend?”
You blinked owlishly, confused with what he suddenly said. The driver only shook his head lightly and smiled. He was watching the young sir sulked until Jin couldn’t keep his silence anymore.
“W-what boyfriend?”
“That boy you were walking with.”
“He’s a friend!”
Jin turned his head to look at you, his eyes appeared darker as he took you in. You were ridiculous in his eyes.
“Sure he is. I’m going to tell your father about this,” he promised in a monotonous voice. His jaw was clenched as he remembered clear as day how the two of you walked so near each other. He knew how other boys thought, especially on that age with their silly crushes.
But if he thought you would be mad, he could not be anymore mistaken. You instantaneously slid across the sit, almost plastering your side to his as you looked up at his eyes.
“Oppa, are you jealous?” You asked with a wide grin on your face, your lips the color of the sweet candy you were eating.
He blinked repeatedly. He could not believe he came across as that! He was just…looking for you. Right?! He was just somehow protective of you.
As gently as he could, he pushed you away. “Don’t be delusional! I’m just worried for uncle! He works so hard only for you to be with boys when you’re so young!” he explained in an annoyed voice, the volume of his voice rising like the way his ears reddened.
“So I should not be with another boy?”
“Yes.”
“So if I stay away from them, will you marry me when we grow up?”
“No.”
You only rolled your eyes at him, unbelieving that the two of you would not end up getting married. Your young self was sure that you would end up with him. A year later, your father transferred you to an all-girl’s school. You didn’t have to know that it was him who influenced your father to do so. At such a young age, Jin was starting to become darker, perhaps a little bit more manipulative. He had done it so underhanded by using his charms and well-placed words that no one would think of him as anything but a sweet, young man.
You were thirteen when girls started being mean to you. Why did kids have to be so mean? Why did kids have to find someone else’s weak spot and attacked it?
You were walking to an alley, a shortcut to your home, minding your own business when the mean girls from school saw you. You learned hate because of them. Your steps faltered when one of the mean girls noticed you.
“Look who’s here,” she sneered, looking at you up and down. Her other two friends paused their chats to look and you and laughed.
“What’s with your messy hair?” One of them asked in disbelief, circling you as she lifted some strands of your hair. You would admit you were bad at combing your hair. You were used to being one of the boys that you didn’t put special care to your appearance. “Do you look like that because you have no mother?”
“You looked like a rat that came from the sewage,” she mocked you. And then the three of them laughed in that annoying way of theirs.
It was not even funny.
You shook your head before attempting to walk past them. But apparently, they weren’t done with you. A scream erupted from your mouth when someone grabbed your hair, tugging it with enough force to bend your neck.
“Where are you going? You think we’re done with you?”
“Yes, freak. We’re done when we say we’re done!”
Even though you fought with all your might, you stood no chance. Three outnumbered one.
Until he came, like a hero you always thought he was.
Jin was in your house, his parents eating dinner with your father. He repeatedly looked at the clock, wondering where could you be. You should be home by now. His knee wouldn’t stop moving as he watched the clock. His parents were laughing with your father when he asked them where you were.
“Oh, she’s on her way home. She’s probably around the alley. You know that girl, she has no patience walking around the block.”
And that was when he left. He politely excused himself, telling them that he would just buy something from the convenience store. Yet, he found himself walking to the mentioned alley.
And he was glad he did.
You were so close to crying, something you didn’t like doing because it always took you forever to stop when someone roughly and carelessly pushed the mean girl away from you. She landed on the ground harshly and you heard her pained whimper. The other two went to their friend, pulling her away from the angry boy. You felt a gentle hand pulling you to stand. You felt Jin brushing the disheveled hair from your face. And then he flashed you a reassuring smile, yet his eyes remained angry.
You were limping as he walked with you. Up until now, he didn’t say anything. And you were all too glad he didn’t. That day, he pulled you to a convenience store, brought medical supplies, and cleaned your wounds quietly. He was bent down as he placed the final bandaid on your knee.
“What are their names?” He asked with an air of nonchalance, but what you didn’t know was his mind was brewing something unpleasant. He was going to unleash hell on those girls.
Without any thought, you told him.
And come morning, you never saw those girls again. Apparently, they were reported to the school and had to transfer.
He was seventeen when he saved you.
You were fourteen and he was eighteen. You were waiting for him outside the university he wanted to enter, in your hand was the placard you spent the whole night making. You were waiting to congratulate him on his entrance exam. There was a crowd outside the school, waiting for their sons or daughters to finish the exam. You were so sure that he was going to pass. Your Jin was the smartest man you knew.
You were grinning and waving wildly when you finally saw him. The years had only made him taller and more handsome. You sighed as his perfect face became more apparent as he neared you. You were so entranced by him that you didn’t notice his other friends and some girls trailing behind him. And they only teased him further when they saw your placard, snickering about how some young girl was pining over Jin.
As if he would be with you.
As if the Jin they knew would be with someone lower than him.
He was so embarrassed that he told you to go home.
“B-but-“
“Go home, Y/N.”
But you meant to ride home with him…
That day, it rained so hard and you were only too pitiful as you walked to the bus stop. You were shivering as you arrived home. And it didn’t come as a surprise that you caught a fever that night. For the first time, you ignored his text asking you if you arrived home safely. You had barely woken up when you noticed his form sitting beside your bed. Your father trusted him so much that he let him in your bedroom. He was silently watching you. On the bedside table was a basin of water and a cloth he used on your forehead. Jin might have appeared stoic in front of you, but inside he was dying from worry when he didn’t hear from you last night.
In fact, he was so worried that he came to your house, knocking on the door sheepishly when he woke up your father and asked if you were home.
He had been here for hours now.
“Are you mad at me?”
You smiled at him weakly. “Never, oppa,” you whispered.
“I’m sorry for leaving you. You should have not came alone, princess,” he lectured gently, still worried that you went on your own for more than an hour travel to cheer for him.
“I wanted to support you,” you pouting defended yourself.
“I know. But next time, don’t. I know you support me even without you going there.”
“W-were you worried for me?”
“Yes.”
“Then,” you said, sitting up slowly before flashing him your cheeky smile. “Will you marry me?”
Seokjin only shook his head.
He was eighteen when he didn’t outrightly said no. He was eighteen when he realized you meant the world to him.
Yet, he was nineteen when he hurt you the most.
It was Christmas. It was the first year he went to college, while you were still in high school. It was the first Christmas he looked forward to because your family and his were spending it together on a cabin near a frozen lake. He was the last one to arrive at the cabin, and he didn’t anticipate the traffic rush from people scrambling to enjoy their holidays that he arrived at a much later night. He didn’t know why, but he spent his first year away from home messaging you daily. He even went as far as demanded you to tell him when you would get home, or when you would go out with your friends, or when you needed someone to pick you up because he would. He would go to you regardless of how far he was. He would drive for hours for you.
Jin parked his car and entered the cabin. He knew you were probably sleeping already, but when he passed the dining room, he could hear conversations that turned something in his brain, something so horrible.
It planted something vile and poisonous in his twisted mind.
“Are you sure about this?” He heard his father’s voice resounding over the quietness of the night. He didn’t know why, but he stayed silent. He was always the polite one, always the one to greet his elders. But right now, he opted to forget his manners.
He opted to eavesdrop.
Your father sighed before putting the glass of whiskey on the table. “I am sure about this. I think it will be good for Y/N and I to move to America. I think it’s an offer I cannot refuse.”
Jin felt a stabbing pain in his heart. No. You would leave him. Your father would take you from him. He didn’t want you gone. He couldn’t have you gone. He would lose it if you weren’t around.
“When will you leave?” His mother asked gently. And Jin dreaded the answer.
“Next week.”
Not if Jin had anything to do with it. No one would take you from him.
“Oppa!”
He snapped out of his dark thoughts when he heard your angelic voice calling to him. You were running full speed to him, and before he knew it you were jumping in his arms. The blunt force of your body slamming to his brought him back to life, to his sanity that was slipping from his grasp.
“You’re here!” You grinned at him as you wrapped your arms around his neck. He was silent. He probably hated your embrace. He probably found you annoying, still.
You were about to step back when he wrapped his muscular arms around you.
“Y/N! Let Jin go. He’s tired from driving all night,” your father nudged you gently, his smile comforting as he greeted Jin. But to Jin, your father lost all his charm the moment he decided to take you away from him.
The lake was frozen.
It was the perfect time to skate. You were giddy as you and your father skated in the early morning of the Christmas eve. It had always been the two of you since you could remember. Your mother died when you were barely walking. To you, your father was your whole world. Your laughters resounded over the whole cabin, and Jin’s parents’ were happy just listening to you. Jin’s mother was preparing hot chocolate, and his father was putting gifts under the tree.
It smelled like Christmas.
“Jin! My boy, come join us!” Your father called when he noticed from a distance Jin who was standing statue like near the lake. His black coat was in perfect contrast of the whiteness of the snow. His cheeks and lips were almost red from the cold temperature.
You thought he looked like a prince.
You waved at him before twirling around the ice. You landed perfectly on your feet. Your father beckoned you to him, and you were only too eager to skate to him when you heard a cracking sound.
You threaded on the thin ice.
And before you knew it, you were falling in the deep, cold water. The unforgiving temperature of the water swallowed your screams. It swallowed your resistance. You managed to get your head above water only to see you own father fell down, the very ground he was skating on cracked under his weight.
It was merely a second but you saw the horror that flashed in his eyes, the despair of his situation, and the anxiety that he would not get to you on time.
The second time you managed to get your head above the freezing water, you saw Jin running to you, shedding his black coat on the ground.
“My father! Save him!” You screamed, even as your voice shook.
But Jin still ran to you. Without any thought for his own safety, he dove down to the harsh water. He dove down like an angel you thought he was as you sank further down, only the light from the cracked lake shone through. He thought he wouldn’t get to you, but by his strong, sheer will, he managed to grab your wrist.
Pulling you up was harder. But Jin was a determined man.
He swam up with one hand, while the other was secured around your body. He managed to drag you up, noticing how blue your lips were. His parents were screaming as they ran to the lake.
“Stay there!” He shouted, knowing how unstable the ice were.
“M-my father. S-save h-him,” you pleaded your hero, gripping his sleeve with weak hand as he wrapped his coat around your shivering body. It was a though he didn’t hear you, only focused on your well-being.
He could save him.
He still had the energy, the adrenaline rush still strong in his veins.
He could technically save him.
But your father was going to take you away from him.
“Jin, p-please save him,” you whispered frantically, looking up to his dark eyes with your pleading ones.
And so, Jin stood up slower, ran slower, and dove a little slower to save your father. No one would technically call him on his bullshit. After all, his parents saw him dove after their friend. You saw him with his own eyes how he dragged your unconscious, pale father from the pits of the cold lake.
You saw him.
“She’s so young to be an orphan. What a tragedy,” you heard them say as you stood stoically on the side. You had not said a word since your father was pronounced dead. They said you were in shocked. They said you were still processing what happened. They said you would be better in time.
But how would they know that?
You were grateful for the Kim family for taking care of everything; from the funeral to the papers, to taking you in. Even Seokjin filed a leave from the university to stay with you.
And he did stay with you. Right now, he was standing beside you, accepting condolences in behalf of you. He was a rock, just a rock that you didn’t want right now. A rock that you somehow selfishly associated with your father’s death.
He stayed with you even when you didn’t want him to.
You had not even looked at him since that tragedy. You knew it was wrong, you knew it was unfair for you to blame him. But were you wrong to blame him when you felt him hesitate? Had he moved a second sooner, would your father still be here? Would he be lying on the hospital bed instead of his coffin?
It was a month later and you still hadn’t said a word despite you going to therapy. It was a month of silence and of you acting like he wasn’t there, like he wasn’t waiting for you to look at him.
“Dear,” his mother called you one night, sitting you down on their living room. “We were thinking…we want to adopt you.”
If you were shocked, Jin was even more surprised. He didn’t know about this. How could his parents decided to do this? To do this to him?!
Your widened eyes looked up from your hands to them. Did they really mean that? Did that mean you weren’t going to be alone anymore? Were you going to have a family again?
“But only if you want to. There’s no rush, dear. Either way,” Mrs. Kim said gently, clasping your hands in hers, tears brimming in her eyes as she took in the pitiful you. “Either way, you’re already a daughter to me.”
“Thank you.” That was the first thing you said in a month. You were so happy. You were so thankful. You were about to hug her when Jin slammed his hand on the table.
“No!”
“Jin! Watch your tone-“
“No, father. I don’t want to be her brother! I don’t want her to be my sister!” He shouted, his voice extremely loud. And for the first time in a month, you looked at his eyes with your hurt ones. He couldn’t even bring himself to regret this. You didn’t know this now, you probably didn’t realize this right now but he was fighting for the future of the two of you. Why would you say thank you to his mother?! Weren’t you the one who kept on bugging him to marry him? Did you now change your mind? No. No, he wouldn’t let you. He didn’t do all of those things for you to change your mind now.
“I’ll never treat you like a sister, Y/N.”
You were turning sixteen when he let you go.
It was already way past your curfew when you arrived at Kim’s home. You were silently walking in the darkened room, certain that no one would catch you creeping in when all of a sudden, light from a lampshade flooded the room.
And there he was, sitting with his legs crossed, his face void of any emotion as he watched you.
“Princess,” he called you in a slurred voice. It was his voice that finally made you looked at him, to look at the boy you used to adore. It was apparent that he was drunk. His cheeks were tinted with redness, and his eyes were somehow unfocused.
You blinked as you took him in. “You’re drunk.”
“And you hate me. And it’s killing me,” he replied back softly, tears were quickly filling his eyes. He could not go on like this. You were killing him. He could not live another day with you being so close yet so far. At that point, he would do anything to get back the young girl who used to adore and support him. Jin stood up, shadows following his form as he neared you.
Had you not let him touched you that night, he would not agree with you leaving him.
But you did not step back when he caressed your face. You did not step back when he hugged you, his shoulders shaking as he sobbed.
“How can I make you love me again?”
“Let me go to America,” you replied calmly. You did want to go abroad, to leave all this mess behind. Had you father not died horribly, the two of you would have lived there by now. But Jin was preventing you from leaving with all his might. The influence he had in his parents was powerful, something that you did not consider. In your young mind, you knew leaving was the best course of action for you. South Korea was killing you. Living with him was killing you. Remembering that he saved you instead of your father despite your endless begging was killing you.
And you hating him because of that was killing him.
Jin towered over you as he leaned back to look at you, his eyes tired and sad. “And if I let you leave me, will you love me again?”
Your heart was beating fast. At that point, you would say anything to get away from him and the memories he represented.
“If I let you leave, my princess,” he whispered as he looked down at your lips. “If I let you leave me, do you promise to marry me when you get back?”
“Yes. I promise, Jin.”
It was your lie that cemented your future.
You were now twenty-five. Years passed by so fast. It was true was they said, time could heal wounds. The promise you made before was long gone from your mind. Your then young mind rationalized that Jin only acted that way because of guilt, that he only asked you to love him again because he was so used to you loving him that once you stopped, you shifted the orbit of his world. You hadn’t personally heard from him in almost nine years. As soon as you turned eighteen and no longer needed the Kim family as guardians, you cut off all communications from him. Yet, you couldn’t bring yourself to distance yourself from Mrs. Kim. She was the mother you never had. But every time you called, Jin would even be more desperate for you. Even his mother was worried for her son, claiming that ever since you stopped communicating with the young man, he started becoming closed off. Every time you called his mother, Jin would snatch the phone away from her, yearning to just hear your voice so badly.
Seokjin was miserable. But his misery was not without anger. He resented the fact that he let you go, that he believed you when you said you would come back to him…that you would marry him.
He regretted letting you leave him. He swore that once he got you back, he would tie you to him so fast you wouldn’t be able to leave him again.
It had been almost a decade.
You weren’t living under the rock, no. To him, it was as though you disappeared from the face of the earth. It was difficult to find you in a foreign country even with his wealth and power. He didn’t know how you were right now. He didn’t know what you look like. He missed the years he could have spent with you. He missed you.
To you though, you could not escape him. His face was everywhere you looked, his life out there for everyone to see. It didn’t come as a surprise to you that he made something more out of himself. After all, ever since you were younger you thought he was larger than life. You were scared to see him in person, though.
You thought seeing him would bring back the pain you so desperately wanted to forget. Your therapist encouraged you to face your fears slowly, saying that you could see him without him seeing you.
You saw him once during their concert in America. Seokjin looked like a prince when you were a child. But now, he was like a king. His persona screamed elegance. He looked happier too as he danced and sang with his bandmates. It was apparent that life had been kind to him. You thought you could finish the whole concert without panicking, but Jin looked a little too long at your direction. And that was when you ran away.
“Do I really have to?” You asked you boss sheepishly, borderline on begging him not to send you back to that place.
He looked at you with an exasperated face, “Do you want to keep your job or not?”
“Right now…” you trailed off, your utter aversion of going back to South Korea was somehow outweighing your desire to eat and afford a roof on your head. “I’m not sure I want to.”
You sighed as you stepped out of the airport. Your company prepared ahead of time, arranging hotel for the whole month you would be staying in this country. You crafted a well-planned schedule which would take you around the pertinent parts of South Korea. You promised yourselves that you would be smart with your time so you could leave as soon as possible with the finished project your company sent you for.
You were expecting a calm and quiet first day.
You really were.
You were praying for that, in fact.
“I apologize, but our system cannot find your name.”
You flashed the hotel receptionist a tight smile, breathing deeply in an attempt to calm yourself. “Can you try one last time?”
She nodded reluctantly, but the result was the same. No room was booked under your name. You thanked her for her time before you attempted to call your boss to no avail. You knew it was probably due to timezone difference, but you couldn’t help but curse him in your head. You would so demand a raise once you get back. You tried booking at another hotel but weirdly enough, all of the rooms were already booked. You even tried booking for an airbnb but the ending was the same.
It was eventually seven in the evening when you swallowed your pride and called her. Mrs. Kim was elated that you were finally back, her motherly warmth could be felt despite her being out of the country at the moment for their anniversary. She did instruct you to go to a house that was an hour away from Seoul. She gave you the passcode and said she would see you as soon as she arrived back to South Korea. By the time you arrived at the white, modern house, it was already almost midnight. The jet lag and the timezone difference were starting to get to you that you decided to shower then sleep rather than touring the house. You would do that tomorrow.
But tomorrow was different.
For the first time in years, you slept so deeply. You had never felt rested since the day of the accident. But today, you felt so serene, so rested. It must have been the wondrous bed that lured you to sleep, or it must have been the extreme weariness from your travel. And probably, it must have been the warmth beside you, your cheek resting on a beating heart.
Wait.
What?
You opened your eyes in sudden alertness, all traces of sleep now gone from your body. The first thing you saw was a plain, white shirt and a pair of black shorts of whomever you were sleeping on top of. The shirt stretched out over a muscular chest and your mind was hopelessly telling you that he smelled familiar…
Slowly, as to not alert whoever this strange man was, you pushed your body away from the man you unknowingly made your bed. You felt his hand resting on the small of your back fell on the bed. With wide eyes and shallow breaths, you looked up at the face of the man you never thought you’d see again- only to find him already looking at you with hooded eyes.
Seokjin gazed at you with warmth, his plump lips lifting on the sides.
“Miss me, princess?”
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Hiraeth II
1K notes · View notes
piedinthepiper · 11 days
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Liked ★
Yandere!Seokjin x fem!reader
Summary: You liked him, liked as in past tense. Liked as in you didn’t like him anymore. He didn’t believe it for a second, and he’ll do anything to make you like him again.
Warnings: Cursing, stalking, Jin is kinda narcissistic?, he’s also mean and delusional, possessiveness, jealousy, voyeurism, smut, drugging, implied kidnapping
Wc: 5.9k
A/n: based on this req! Love the idea, hope you like it!
Disclaimer: This is 100% fiction. I am in no way saying that this is how any member of bts would act. Nor do I condone the actions detailed in the story. This is purely for entertainment purposes only. If any of the warnings trigger you, or you’re under 18 ¡do not read! I’m not your mother, and I don’t take any accountability for what you decide to read online!
He met you through Jimin. You were one of Jimin’s best friends, it seemed like he had known you for a long time.
So who were he to ruin Jimin’s image of you, and tell him that you were just so annoying. You were pretty yes, but it was something about your laugh. Something about the way you talked. It just rubbed Jin the wrong way. There are some people you just don’t click with, he thought to himself. As he looked at you from across the table. Some people are just not meant to be friends, and that’s ok. The only problem is that Jimin brought you with him no matter what. It was always “can y/n come?”. He asked Jimin once why he brought you around all the time.
“She just broke up with her boyfriend. Cut her some slack man.”
He had answered. But it had been eight months. Which, in his opinion, was more than enough time to heal from a breakup. But you still showed up. Every. Single. Time.
“What are you going to order, Jin?”
You asked him, looking back at him from across the table. You were slightly blushing for some reason. Everyone’s eyes turned to him, waiting for his response. In all honesty, he had been too busy thinking about you, to even read the menu.
“I don’t know yet.”
He answered in a stern voice.
“I really like the lobster here, it’s really good.”
Jin almost rolled his eyes at your comment.
“Really? Well I guess I’ll order that!”
He said with an overly excited tone. Not being able to control the sarcasm in his voice. Thankfully the waiter came before you could answer him. Everyone started saying their order, before it was his turn.
“I’ll have the salmon.”
He said and looked briefly over at you. To see if you’d have a reaction. You looked puzzled down at the menu for a second.
“I’ll have the salmon as well.”
“Wait! Jin, wait for me!”
You yelled after him, trying to run in your high heels. He had finally been able to leave. And thankfully he was able to mostly converse with Namjoon during the dinner. He had almost made it into the taxi, but you caught him. He couldn’t just shut the door in your face. He’s not directly mean to you, at least he tries not to be directly mean to you. But god, you were so annoying! Why couldn’t you just take a hint and leave him alone?
“What?”
You were a little out of breath, and needed a moment to catch your breath before talking.
“I was just- I live on the way to your place. Maybe we could, you know, share a taxi?”
He mentally cursed himself for not shutting the door in your face. Cause now he had to actually be alone with you for at least 10 minutes.
“Oh come on, I’ll pay for myself don’t worry.”
You said when you saw him hesitating.
“Fine.”
He simply answered and jumped in the backseat. Not caring to find an excuse.
“So, did you have fun tonight?”
You asked him once the taxi started moving. He sighed. Now he had to small talk with you as well.
“Yeah it was alright.”
He shrugged. He could see in his peripheral view that you were looking at him.
“The salmon was so good! You were so right about that one.”
You tried again, once he didn’t take the conversation further.
“I didn’t say anything to you about it. You just copied me.”
You laughed, thinking that he was just joking.
“You’re so funny!”
You said in between laughs, and even went as far as leaning over him in a fit of laughter. He sat completely still. Not engaging with you what so ever. Once you realised, you sat back up.
“We should go out for dinner more together. I think it would-“
“Please y/n! Just shut the fuck up!”
He suddenly bursted out. He didn’t mean to. It just came out.
“You don’t have to talk all the time. You’re so annoying!”
He looked at you, your smile was no where to be seen. And for some reason he missed it already.
“I’m sorry.”
He quickly mumbled, hoping that your lips would turn at least a little bit upwards. But they didn’t. You looked away from him, turning your face completely towards the window. Your entire body was trying the get the furtherest away from him as possible, and it hurt him for some reason. He sighed. Your place was coming up, he would probably feel better once you left the car. Out of sight, out of mind.
“I talk so much because I like you, Jin.”
You said, barley above a whisper. He looked back at you. The taxi stopped, signalising for you to get out.
“I really liked you.”
You gave him a last devastating look before opening the door and stepping out. You shut the door in his face before he could answer. It didn’t matter, he was left speechless. And he did in fact not feel any better now that you left the car. He felt even worse.
“Liked” you said you “liked him”. As in past tense. As in you didn’t like him anymore. He was laying in bed, staring up at the ceiling. He couldn’t sleep, and when he can’t sleep he starts thinking. It had been a week since the incident in the taxi. The incident where you said you “liked” him. Whatever that meant.
He would give you an apology next weekend. Pull you aside before you sit down at the table. Explain that he was just tired, that he didn’t mean it. In the moment he meant it, but he didn’t mean to say it out loud. He was amazed by the fact that he actually felt sorry for you. He didn’t like you, so why was he so obsessed with getting you to like him? Maybe he liked you more than he thought? Nah. He told himself before rolling over and closing his eyes. Trying to think of something or anything else.
Friday came around eventually, and he was ready to meet the boys (and you) at a restaurant. He walked in, a little earlier than usual. He had to pull you aside before you sat down, just so it didn’t get awkward.
“You’re early today, what’s up bro?”
Jimin lit up once he saw Jin approaching the table. He sat down beside Jimin, briefly looking at the empty seat next to him.
“Where’s y/n?”
He asked once he realised it was only the two of them. You always arrived with Jimin. He always picked you up, even if it was a longer route. Jin felt weird just thinking about it. What if Jimin had feelings for you? Why would he go to such lengths if he didn’t? The feeling in his chest couldn’t be described as anything but jealousy.
“She’s not feeling well.”
He simply commented.
“Why?”
He asked with a smug face, slightly poking him in the side with his elbow. Jin rolled his eyes, leaning away from him.
“She’s always with you, it’s not weird that I’m asking.”
He scolded his younger friend. Jimin stopped, but giggled slightly at his defensiveness.
“Whatever you say man.”
Jimin said, before changing the topic. Jin wondered if you truly was sick, or if you just didn’t want to face him. You didn’t strike him as a cowardly person. You would probably show up if you could. So the only explanation to why you wouldn’t show up to hear his apology, must be that you were sick of course.
But two weeks after that, you didn’t show. Two months passed and still no sign of you. Jin wanted to ask Jimin, but he didn’t want Jimin to think he actually cared. But he did care. He wanted to apologise for being a dick, that’s all. His conscience needed to be cleared for him to move on. At least that’s what he told himself. The first weekend after the two month mark, (not that he kept track of the time or anything), the boys went to watch a football game. It was weird that you didn’t show, considering that you loved football. You wouldn’t miss out. So Jin decided to ask again.
“Is y/n still sick? Did she fucking break her leg or something?”
He asked Jimin once they had found their places.
“I don’t know man. I asked her if she wanted to come, she said she was going with someone else.”
He said and shrugged. Someone else? Why was he hurt that you would rather go with someone else?
“Ok, I’ll go get a beer. Anyone want one?”
Namjoon was the only one who raised a hand, small excuses of work in the morning was heard from the others. He squeezed out of the row of seats. He needed to clear his head, he had to stop this obsession he had with you. After the game he would call you, and if you didn’t pick up he would go to your house. Enough was enough, he had to see you.
“Jin?”
Your voice made him turn around. There you were, two beers in hand and the familiar blue shirt of your favourite team. Your hair was in a ponytail, so he could clearly see your entire face. And you were smiling. Smiling at him like what happened two months and a week ago was ancient history.
“Y/n? What are you doing here?”
He mentally face palmed himself for asking something so obvious. You looked down at your shirt and back up at him.
“The same reason you are, I suppose.”
He laughed awkwardly, before you both went quiet.
“Look, y/n. I just wanted to ap-“
“Hey, babe. I’ll hold these for you.”
A man’s voice interrupted him. He looked at the man who approached you take your beers. You looked at him as well before looking back to Jin.
“I’m sorry, this is my boyfriend Hoseok.”
Jin was left speechless at your choose of words to describe the man. You had a boyfriend now?! The feeling of jealousy started to spread through his chest again.
“This is Jin, Jimin’s friend.”
You told this Hoseok, when he didn’t answer. Jimin’s friend? That was it? He was offended by the fact that you didn’t view him as more. You had a crush on him for gods sake!
“I’d shake your hand man, but you know.”
He raised the beers in his hand awkwardly. Jin still kept quiet. Not wanting to utter a simple word to the man you dared calling your boyfriend.
“I’ll catch up with you, just go back to the seats, ok?”
You told your boyfriend, and he happily complied walking away from the uncomfortable situation.
“Why are you acting so strange?”
He shook his head.
“I don’t know. I just- I thought you had a crush on me. But now you have a boyfriend, so.”
You smiled at him.
“I liked you, yeah. But after you rejected me in that taxi, I moved on. It’s not that deep, some people just don’t click.”
His stomach turned into knots, he hated the way you sounded like him. He hated the way you spoke about him. That it wasn’t that deep? Well, it was really deep to him. Extremely deep actually.
“I’m sorry, y/n. I really am. I should’ve never said those things to you.”
He managed to apologise, regardless of the burning anger he felt inside. How dared you reject him? He rejected you first.
“Jin, it’s ok. Seriously. It’s all in the past.”
You patted his shoulder before taking a step away from him.
“Tell the boys I said hi.”
You said before walking away. This was not how this was going to end. He had spent two months and a week thinking about exactly how you would respond, and what would happen after. You were not supposed to be so nonchalant and run away to your new boyfriend. You were supposed to accept his apology and run into his arms. Maybe even give him a kiss and a blowjob for his effort to be so empathetic. He was going to make things right.
He couldn’t sleep again. How could he after you basically dumped him? So he started thinking. Why would you do such a thing? Why would you hurt him? He knows that he hurt you, but he apologised. So you should stop whatever prank you got going on and come back to the group. Come back to him. He really didn’t know why he felt this need for you. Before all this he literally couldn’t stand you. But now it’s like he yearned for you. And it was baffling to him that you didn’t feel the same.
Maybe you were just using that Hoseok guy to make him jealous. Yeah, that’s it. This was your payback. He laughed at the thought and sat up in his bed. Turning on the lamp on his nightstand. Might as well pay you a visit.
He payed the taxi driver before closing the door carefully. It was the middle of the night, not a soul to see in your neighbourhood. He looked up at your apartment building, he knew you lived on the seconds floor. The light in your living room was on. He quickly looked down at his phone. 02:38 am. You should’ve been asleep already.
He walked over to the other side of the road to get a better view of your living room. Trying to get a glimpse of you in your natural habitat. And to his surprise you were there. Completely naked. He felt a familiar feeling in his groin once he saw what was going on behind those walls. You were on the sofa on top of your new boyfriends dick. Your back was turned towards the window, giving Jin a perfect view of your ass bouncing up and down. Jin ripped his eyes away from you to check if anyone else was seeing this. But no lights were on, and no bystanders. What a freak you were, having sex right in front of a window where anyone could see.
Or maybe you were doing it for him? The curtains were slightly open, just enough open for him to see you. Maybe you didn’t shut them completely, for him? Maybe you hoped he would show up after the two of you met the same day? It was working for him. Mesmerised by the way your body moved in pleasure, he slid his hand into his pyjama bottoms. He couldn’t help himself. You looked so good, and you were so perfectly placed that he could see the dick going in and out of you. His only wish was hearing you. He wanted to hear you moan so bad. Suddenly you slowed down. Jin’s hand moved faster, trying to reach release before the show was over. Just one last bounce before you sank down beside him. Now facing the window. He continued, now seeing your heaving naked chest sprawled out on the sofa. He was close, very close. And once he saw you get up and walk towards the window completely naked, body glistening, tits slightly bouncing, he couldn’t help but feel a euphoric release.
Reality hit him immediately after. In the time it took for him to ride out his orgasm, you had made it to the window. Now staring directly at him. He quickly pulled his hand out of his trousers, turning around to face the wall immediately. The sticky wet spot that made the fabric of his pyjamas stick to his skin, was a shameful reminder. He didn’t know if you had seen him. He didn’t know if you were calling the police, or still looking at him. But he stood completely still, awaiting his destiny. After a few minutes he pulled his phone up from his pocket, calling for a taxi back to his place.
It wasn’t until he heard the taxi pull up he dared turning around. His eyes flickered up to the window. No sight of you, no sight of nothing. The curtains were shut completely this time.
It was Saturday, Jimin had invited the boys to his house for a few drinks and some food. Jin hadn’t gotten drunk in some time and quite frankly needed it to forget whatever madness happened the weekend before. So he gladly accept once Jimin proposed the idea in the group chat. Something he would regret.
“Can you get the door? I can’t let this burn man.”
Jimin asked and pointed to whatever he was making on the stove. Jin, being the first to show up that night was more than happy to welcome one of his mates, and walked over to the door.
“Jin! It’s so nice to see you again.”
You said and gave him a small hug as you stepped into Jimin’s apartment. He was left speechless. By you, but also by the man that followed you inside. You brought your boyfriend?
“Hey man!”
Hoseok said and stretched out his hand for him to shake. Jin just stood there looking at his hand. He couldn’t move. Too terrified that this was your way of revenge. You were going to expose him as the creep that jerked off outside your house to all his friends. And on top of that you brought your boyfriend to rub it even more in his face.
“You know what, I’m a hugger anyways.”
Hoseok laughed and pulled him in to a tight hug once he didn’t shake his hand. Once he pulled away from the hug, Jin smiled at him. He couldn’t risk getting on the bad side of Hoseok either. Maybe you told him?
“Sorry, Hoseok right?”
He asked and took his hand in his. Your boyfriend chuckled and nodded. What a ray of fucking sunshine of a boyfriend you got. Not completely different to himself, he thought.
“Oh please, just call me Hobi!”
He smiled before walking past Jin and following you inside. Jin continued to stand by the door for a second as he heard both you and your boyfriend greet Jimin in the kitchen. He had to talk to you. He had to pull you aside before you got the chance to reveal his big dirty secret. The boys would think he was disgusting, a creep, a weirdo. What the hell was he doing here? He had to run away. Run far far away and never come back.
“Are you ok?”
He got ripped out of his thoughts and realised the tall figure standing in front of him.
“Ah, Namjoon. You scared me.”
He tried to play off. As if he wasn’t standing in front of the open entrance door just staring out into the hallway.
“I’m ok yeah, but what about you? What have you been up to?”
He said and threw his arm around Namjoon’s shoulders, leading him into the apartment.
“Woah, ok. It’s only been a week since we last saw each other.”
An hour had passed. You still hadn’t said anything. Not even mentioned that night. He had taken a few shots out of agony and suspense. He couldn’t get drunk. No, not while you were a ticking bomb ready to ruin his image forever. He had to stay sober so he could defend himself whenever the situation arose. Or if he was lucky enough to get you alone so he could convince you, hell maybe even beg for you not to say anything. He would do anything for you. For you not to say anything, of course.
“I have to go to the bathroom.”
You announced, slightly intoxicated. You were so cute, your face a little red and your words a little slow.
“I have to go to the bathroom too!”
Jin quickly said, getting up quickly. The room got quiet. He realised he had said that a little loud and with a little too much excitement.
“Ok.”
You shrugged, walking away from the table. Everyone started talking again, meaning he was in the clear. He stumbled after you.
“After you, princess.”
You said as you proudly held the bathroom door open for him. He would’ve smiled at your joke if this wasn’t a serious situation.
“I’m sorry, but I have to go first.”
You mumbled and started unbuttoning your trousers. He nodded. He didn’t even have to pee.
“Y/n, I’m so sorry. I didn’t-“
“I’m not drunk enough to pee while you’re watching me.”
He panicked at your words and didn’t know what to do with himself.
“Oh- uh. Do you want me to leave?”
You laughed.
“No silly. Just turn around.”
He did as instructed.
“I’m sorry, ok? I should’ve never done that! Please, just don’t tell the others y/n. I won’t recover from it.”
He started pleading, still facing the door. You went quiet for a few seconds. He gulped, anxious of what you would answer.
“What the hell are you talking about?”
You said and flushed the toilet. He turned around knowing you were finished. You were struggling with the button of your jeans, but looking at him with a confused look.
“Are you playing with me? Please if you are, don’t, I can’t handle that right now.”
You started washing your hands.
“No, Jin. I have no idea what you’re talking about. Is this about that time in the taxi again? Cause I told you it’s ok.”
“No. I mean- uh. Yes?”
He didn’t know what to say. Did you really mean it? Had you not seen him that night? A wave of relief washed over him. If you were telling the truth he was the luckiest man alive.
“What?”
“It’s about last weekend.”
He tested, seeing if you would remember.
“And?”
You asked puzzled. He let out a breath of relief. You were completely clueless.
“I didn’t mean to be so awkward with your- ehhh, Hobi.”
He managed to get out, not wanting to call him your boyfriend out loud. Now that he wasn’t caught and labelled a total pervert, he still had a chance to win you back.
“My Hobi, huh? You’re cute Jin.”
You said as you unlocked the door.
“You’re forgiven by the way.”
You closed the door behind you, and he quickly locked it. He had never felt more relieved in his entire life. Maybe you weren’t looking at him, maybe you were just looking around to see if anyone saw? And maybe he was fortunate enough to be well enough hidden that night to not get caught. Well, he knew he would be more careful the next time. He shook his head, baffled by his own words. The next time? He thought as he flushed the toilet. He didn’t understand what he felt towards you, but he wanted there to be a next time. He wanted the next time to be him underneath you, not your stupid boyfriend. He unlocked the door and started walking down the hallway. He didn’t want to admit it to himself before, but maybe he actually liked you. Like, liked liked you. He sat back down at the table. Taking another shot now that he could actually get drunk.
“Ooo, where are you going?”
Jimin asked you. Jin hadn’t heard the first part of the conversation, but pretended he had been here the entire time.
“This very fancy spa hotel. He said it was an early birthday present.”
You said and looked lovingly at your boyfriend.
“Wow, you’re lucky! You must really love her, Hobi!”
“You’re leaving?”
Jin asked you, ignoring Jimin’s hilarious comment, and quite honestly he didn’t want to hear Hobi’s answer to that. You nodded.
“Yeah, next Friday.”
He took another shot, drowning the jealousy that was starting to bubble inside him.
“I just don’t know what to do with the cats. I’ve asked a bunch of people, but everyone’s busy.”
“I’ll watch them!”
Jin blurted out, almost too excited.
“Are you sure? I’ll pay you if you want to-“
“No, no need to pay me. Don’t have anything happening next weekend anyways.”
“Weren’t you going out of town to see your parents next weekend?”
Namjoon asked with confused brows. Jin mentally cursed him for almost ruining his plan.
“No, that’s the weekend after. I’m completely free next weekend, ready to watch some cats.”
You smiled at him, he had missed that smile so much. To ever think that he didn’t like your smile was insane. What was even more insane was the fact that he blindly said yes to watch your cats, just to be in your house. But he’ll happily feed those little fuckers if it meant that he had full access to your home.
“Again, thank you so much. You’re a life saver!”
You yelled out the window of your car as you and your boyfriend drove away. He waved goodbye as he watched the car slowly disappear in the horizon. Once you were gone he hurried into your apartment, ready to snoop around. He only did it to get to know you more of course. He wanted to know every single little thing about you that only your home could reveal. He sat down on the sofa on the exact spot where he saw you have sex. He felt the soft fabric between his fingers, thinking of that night. He slowly laid down face first, wanting to be close to the spot where you sat completely naked. He rubbed his cheek on it, slightly smelling hints of your perfume. He could stay like that forever. Just frolicking in your scent.
But one of your cats jumped up beside his face, ruining the moment. He got up, annoyed at the grey fluffy animal. He silently pushed the cat off, but when it once again jumped up beside him he decided to look around somewhere else.
He found the bathroom, opening up the cupboard next to the mirror. Some makeup, some skin care, tweezers, tampons. Nothing exciting. He opened the door to your shower, nothing but numerous soaps. He looked over at the bin for a second and wondered if he was willing to go that low. Once he saw your dirty laundry he decided against it. He opened the lid and started digging, a mixture of your perfume and your natural scent hit him. He had never been happier. He suddenly stopped and pulled out a singular thong. It was baby pink with lace. He imagined how good you would look in it. He stuffed it in his hoodie, deciding to venture off to your bedroom.
He immediately opened the nightstand, hoping for something good. And you delivered. Toys of all kinds in different flashy colours. He smiled as he picked up the hot pink dildo. He wondered if you ever thought of him while using it. The thought alone making his pants feel tighter. He walked back to the sofa, he knew what he wanted to do now.
Jin was watching tv in your house once he heard the door open. He knew you would be arriving that day, so he managed to be on his best behaviour and not jerk off in every room of your apartment that day. Small things to make you happy. He quickly got up to welcome you.
“You got home quite late, I was starting to worry.”
No he wasn’t, he knew exactly at what time you would be home. He found a copy of your reservation at the hotel and calculated the time it took for you to get here. But he wanted you to know that he cared.
“No need, I’m home.”
You gave him a forced smile. Something was wrong. A feeling of excitement rushed through him. You came home alone, did this mean that-? Did you really break up with Hobi? He held back a smile.
“Here let me help you.”
He said and reached for your suitcase. Your grip tightened.
“No it’s fine.”
You simply said and rolled it into your apartment. He headed you sigh. He wanted to wait a little longer to see if you would break. Hoping that you would tell him the good news and not let the suspense kill him.
“Can we talk?”
You asked and looked back at him, removing your coat. He nodded understandingly as he took your coat before you could protest and hung it up. You walked over to the kitchen table and sat down. Putting your head in your hands.
“Do you want something to drink? I can make you-“
“No, Jin. Please just sit down.”
You were visibly upset, so he followed up on your request. Sitting down opposite of you. You took a few seconds before you started talking.
“Do you care to explain why you did what you did while I was gone?”
You asked and looked up at him. He froze. This was not the good news he was expecting. This wasn’t happening. How could you know?
“What are you talking about?”
He said and tried to laugh it off. You shook your head.
“So you’re telling me you have no idea what I’m talking about?”
You asked strictly. He gulped.
“No, y/n. I’ve just been watching your cats. Did I do something wrong?”
You let out another sigh before you pulled up your phone. You touched the screen a few times before your turned it around, showing him exactly what you were talking about. He watched in horror as he saw himself in your bed with his hand around his dick. The other hand was holding your underwear under his nose.
“There are many more of these videos.”
You said as you retracted your phone.
“I don’t need to see them.”
He quickly answered as you put your phone back in your pocket.
“Fine, but I want to know why, Jin.”
His mind was racing. How the fuck was he supposed to dig himself out of this one? You had physical proof now. He couldn’t deny it anymore.
“I didn’t know I was being filmed.”
He muttered as a poor excuse.
“Me neither. I set those cameras up when I didn’t think I would find someone to watch the cats. Unfortunately for you I forgot to take them down.”
He went silent again, slipping his hands into his deep pockets. Feeling around, trying to come up with a solution.
“Please tell me you have a logical explanation for all this. Why did you masturbate every single day with my stuff while I was gone?”
You seemed more upset that you couldn’t make any sense out of it, compared to what he actually did. Maybe if he just confessed you would forgive him.
“I like you, y/n. No, I actually think I love you. I’m in love with you.”
He blurted out. You were taken aback at his sudden honesty.
“I don’t understand why, I used to hate you. I never liked you. But ever since the incident in the taxi I haven’t been able to take my mind off you.”
He reached for your hand over the table, but you quickly pulled away.
“I love you, y/n!”
“So why didn’t you tell me? Why did you do this instead? You realise how fucking crazy you sound right now, right?”
You snapped back at him. Coughing slightly afterwards at your sudden outburst.
“Let me make you a cup of tea, it’ll help with that cough.”
He said calmly. You shook your head.
“I don’t want tea, I want you to leave my house right now!”
“Please, can we just talk about this like adults? I don’t want to fight with you.”
You stopped, wanting to hear what he had to say.
“Let me put the kettle on, and I’ll tell you everything. Just please, I care about you.”
You touched your throat as you slowly nodded. He quickly got up and started the kettle.
“I did it because I didn’t want to ruin your relationship. I saw how happy you were with Hobi. I thought this was my only way to be close to you.”
He tried his best to get you to feel sorry for him. He knew you would be much better off with him than that excuse of a boyfriend you had. He just wanted to pull on your heartstrings. Even if it was completely a lie.
“I just- sorry. I’m sorry. But I’m crazy about you, y/n. I’ve never felt like this before. I didn’t know what to do.”
You looked down at the table as he prepared your tea.
“Do you want sugar and milk?”
He asked carefully.
“Just sugar.”
You answered after a few beats of silence. You were clearly fighting some sort of mental battle. But it was alright, he was going to make that decision for you.
“I really care about you. I’ve been nothing but a dick to you, I know. But I want to make it up to you.”
He placed the tea on the table before you. You stirred it a couple of times as you waited for the tea to get ready.
“It’s just really uncomfortable, Jin. Yes I used to have a crush on you but that doesn’t give you the right to do such things.”
You scolded him as you brought the cup to your mouth slightly blowing at the hot beverage.
“Again, I’m sorry.”
He said and bowed his head in fake defeat. This wasn’t his loss. Sooner than later you would be his.
“I don’t know if I can forgive you. I need time to think about all this. It’s all too much for me right now.”
You took a sip, feeling the sweet warm drink soothe your sore throat. You immediately took another big sip to get the feeling back.
“I get it. I’ll give you all the time you need when we get to your new home.”
He said bluntly. You crossed your eyebrows at his comment.
“My new home?”
He nodded.
“You’ll love it there. Just you and me. We can spend as much time as you’d want to heal all the shitty things I’ve done to you.”
You shook your head.
“What? What are you talking about?”
You felt your sight getting blurry, your body suddenly felt really heavy.
“What- what have you done to me?”
You slurred as you fell back in your chair. Tears forming in the corners of your eyes as you felt yourself loosing control of your body.
“It’s ok, baby.”
Jin got up from his chair and walked over to you. In your last efforts you slung yourself off the chair and onto the floor, trying to crawl away from him.
“I’m sorry, but I had to do this. I’m sure you’ll forgive me once you realise what an amazing life we’ll have together.”
He bowed down and grabbed you. Making you look at him. Finally you would be his and his only.
“Fuck you.”
You managed to say before the drugs made you close your eyes and fall limp in his arms. You looked beautiful, he thought. Like sleeping beauty just waiting for him to save you. It would probably take some time for you to forgive him, but like he said, he would give you all the time you needed. And eventually you would realise that you were made for each other. He would make sure of that.
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atinystraynstay · 2 months
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Different Sides - Kim Seokjin
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Synopsis: To Seokjin, the world was his to claim. He could care less about the differences that were meant to keep people separated or the physical miles that made the distance. Especially when it comes to you, he was ready to give your relationship his all.
Pairing: Kim Seokjin x reader
Genre: Fluffffff, strangers to lovers high-key missing Seokjin hours 💜
Word Count: 2.5k
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Kim Seokjin has always been curious about the world around him. He believed everywhere told a story. And instead of reading about it, he wanted to just experience it for himself.
While Jin was exploring the world outside of Korea, he knew that he always had to find Korean food wherever he goes. Whether it was at a restaurant or finding ingredients at home, he was determined to get a little piece of home wherever he goes. On this particular trip, he wondered into an Asian grocery store. He never knew places like this existed, but he was overjoyed.
That afternoon, you found yourself venturing to the Asian grocery store. You were inspired by a video you saw online of a person making a stew, which you figured would be perfect for a cold, rainy night.
With a list of ingredients typed onto your phone, you began to stroll through the aisles for everything you needed. You were pretty confident looking through the produce aisles. Potatoes, onions, green chili. Where you struggled is one you got to the spices.
You frequently glanced between the English typed on your phone with the Hangul on the printed labels. Maybe you could just grab what looked like it was used in the video? But the problem was also that many of the ingredients looked alike. Your eyes glanced around you to see if an employee could help you but there was no one in sight.
Jin was around though. He wanted to make naengmyeon, a craving he had since he landed in the United States. He was able to pick up most of the ingredients pretty easily, but he was having a hard time locating the actual noodle packets for it.
That's when he spotted you. You were staring up at the expansive shelves of spices, eyes bouncing around. He took note of the freckles that decorates your cheeks and the few moles that kissed your jawline. Your eyebrows were slightly scrunched which he found adorable.
Slowly, as to not startle you, he made his way over to you. His packet of ingredients rested on his forearm.
"You seem like you might need some help? May I?"
Jin silently thanked his parents and the universe for allowing him to study abroad when he was in his youth. He had gotten pretty good at being able to read English. He was just trying to work on speaking it without additional assistance, especially since he was traveling on his own. You looked up, relief washing over your face. Jin was mesmerized by the color of your eyes. He couldn't quite describing them but he found them enchanting. They were such a unique color, almost as if it was a color made just for you. He noticed your eyebrows relaxed as you eased down from your tiptoes.
"Please? I thought I was doing a good job at writing all the ingredients down, but I forgot about the part of the bottles being in a different language."
He chuckled lightly at you. Not because he was amused by your struggle, but he just found your adorable. He also loved that you thought you had to justify yourself to him, but there was no need. It was fate by the universe for you two to cross paths like this.
Jin held out his free hand, motioning for your phone. He gladly took your device and began to scroll through. He was able to easily pick up the exact spices you needed. It also worked out in his favor seeing as he could easily reach them from his height. With ease, he grabbed the remaining spices you needed before setting them down in your basket. "You know, there is one thing you're missing from your list." To your surprise, you raised an eyebrow. You figured that this stranger must know what they are talking about. Just eyeing his own basket, he seemed to know his way around the kitchen, so surely he could put two and two together to figure out what you were making. "What am I missing? Is there a secret ingredient to make it better?" You laughed. "Yeah, you're missing my number. Every good meal needs good company."
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You weren't the type of person to invite someone over spontaneously, let alone someone you just met a few hours ago. Yet, there was something about Jin that was different. After the interaction at the grocery store, you craved being around him.
Your eyes bounced around your studio apartment. You wanted to make sure everything was set up appropriately. Was it too casual? You had floor lamps on rather than the harsh overhead light in the main part of the room. There also were three candles of different heights lit on your kitchen table. Was it too romantic?
All the ingredients were laid out on the kitchen island, ready to be prepared. Jin insisted that you two cook together. "I just want to make sure you do it correctly," he teased you in the grocery store. If it meant that you could to spend time with him, you weren't complaining.
Knock knock knock
"Shit," you murmured underneath your breath. You didn't get the chance to second-guess yourself. Your heart pounding almost to the same beat at Jin knocking on the door. How could a stranger make you so nervous so easily?
"Coming! Just give me a second," you called out. You walked over towards the front of your apartment while your hands got busy at smoothing out your clothes. You wore a pair of ripped jeans and a grey sweatshirt with the hands rolled up to the elbows since you two were cooking. You had your hair half pulled back by a claw clip, showing off the gold earrings you might've stolen from your sibling.
Before you answered the door, you looked at your reflection in the mirror. You made sure your makeup, while light, was not smudged. You gave yourself a quick smile, wanting to make sure you had nothing stuck in your teeth. Your hands were trembling with excitement.
Satisfied with your appearance, you walked fully to the door. You unlocked the top lock before opening it up. You gasped softly to be presented first with a bouquet of flowers, Jin smiling sheepishly.
"Really hope you're not allergic," he joked. You giggled before shaking your head, gladly taking the flowers into your arms. "Not trying to take this date to the hospital."
"I'm sure you could even make a trip to the hospital fun," you teased. You stepped aside to allow Jin into your apartment. He smiled as he crossed the threshold, watching as he shrugged off the jacket he was wearing. Holy fuck. His back and shoulder muscles are impressive.
Seokjin could feel his eyes on him, causing him to smirk. He glanced over at you from over his shoulder. "Like what you see?" As if to make things worse, he rolled his sleeves up to his elbows now that jacket has been discarded. You just couldn't take your eyes off of him, and he knew that.
Your cheeks quickly gained a red hue. You wanted to apologize, not wanting to be rude. However, hearing his laughter as he proceeded to head towards your kitchen gave you some relief. While at the same time, your stomach was warm and fuzzy from hearing him. He really was something.
"Are you coming, sweet girl? Every great chef needs their sous-chef."
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Making dinner quickly became the thing you two did. Whether it was for one another or together, the two of you were always in the kitchen. It was your favorite way of showing your love to someone. Jin was just content to be wherever you were.
That day in the grocery store turned into your first date of many. Throughout Jin's visit to America, he made frequent visits to your apartment with bags filled with groceries. Your apartment became filled with delicious smells, infectious laughter, and the sound of you two making out.
You couldn't believe how quickly things have escalated between the two of you. Yet, it felt like you two have known each other this whole time. He understood you in ways nobody else has even tried to comprehend before. And you were so curious about him - from his wit to his kind heart.
The months of Jin's stay were quickly dwindling down to a few weeks. And now, there were only a few days.
Everyone said the two of you would never work out. Your friends were concerned that the distance would be too much for you two to endure. Your parents were not the biggest fans of him considering they only had met him once.
Yet, their voices were all white noise to you. The only person that mattered when it came to your relationship was Kim Seokjin. Every day, he made it his mission to make it known how committed he was to you. He knew long distance relationships could be a source of anxiety, especially when it comes to unknowns.
There was nothing more that he was certain about than how he feels about you. The two of you met when Seokjin was on a solo trip. Since studying abroad in his youth, he was fascinated with the world around him. That is why he was so inspired to take up English, so he could be more connected with the world.
At the moment, you were both lying on your couch. Jin's back was against the arm of the couch, so you could rest comfortably against his back. One of his arms was wrapped around your body, keeping you close. Your other hand was playing with his free hand. You were comparing your hand sizes, seeing as he was much larger than your own. You would spread your fingers and he would mimick, adding to your amusement. In reality, it was serving as a distraction from what you really wanted to do.
"Alright, I've known you for about two months now. Something is going on in that pretty little head of yours,'' Jin commented.
He lifted his head off of your chin, so he could look at you properly. You often got quiet when you had something on your mind, something that you were going back and forth about confessing. Your eyebrows would furrow the slightest bit. You always thought you were slick about it, but he could see right through you.
"Come on, talk to me."
Jin offered a gentle smile. He was ready to listen to whatever was troubling your mind. You felt so comfortable around him.
"What are we doing, Jin?"
He furrowed his eyebrows, tilting his head in confusion. "Right now, we're laying on your couch. We might cook, or if you want to just order in, you can show me your favorite restaurant. I won't get jealous because know I'm your favorite chef though," he smirked.
Normally, his humor helped lift the mood but not this time. Not when there were so many scenarios playing out in your mind at this exact moment.
"No, I mean, what are we doing? What is this between us?"
Jin sat up a bit straighter, but he didn't loosen his hold on you. His smirk did disappear though and furrowed eyebrows. He was providing all the space possible to allow you to elaborate.
Sure, he's thought about it. He was also curious as to what you two were heading toward, or what you could call yourselves. He's never felt a connection as intensely as whatever it is you two had. But he was aware that time was no longer on their side, and it was time to explore what life was outside of the bubble you two created.
If only he could freeze time before it all burst.
"Y/n, angel, I'm not sure."
You frowned at his words, trying your best not to fall apart in front of him. It could have just been a summer romance to him, nothing more and nothing less. You couldn't help but get your hopes up though.
"We have something special," he reaffirmed. "And I know that things are going to be different once I head back to Korea. I guess I'm not sure where things are heading because everyone has tried telling us that it's not going to work between you and I. But I want to prove them wrong." "So why don't we? Why don't we give it a try? Who says that it has to end the moment we say goodbye at the airport?" "What if instead of 'goodbye', we just say 'see you later'?" He offered.
If there was one thing about Kim Seokjin, he was a determined man. Whatever he wanted, he practically got.
However, Jin was skilled at making sure you never felt pressured to say yes to him. He was just happy to be in the same room as you. But, little did he know, it was so easy to say yes to him. You'd say a million times as long as it brought that charming smile of his.
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Two years later
"I don't thnk anyone in this room would have thought we'd be here today," your best friend spoke into the microphone.
You couldn't help but groan a bit in embarrassment, turning your head to hide in Jin's shoulder. His laughter rumbled from his chest, vibrating throughout you which made your heart flutter with excitement. He had such an effect over you.
His lips gently pressed to your head, an arm around your petite body. He couldn't help himself but run his finger over the white lace that covered your body. He just loved the feeling of the material underneath his fingertips.
What he loved more was the fact it was you sitting beside you. You wore a gorgeous white dress that looked custom-made for him. Truthfully, you could have walked down the aisle in a sack and he'd still be mesmerized by you.
"Seriously though. Their love story is one that you read about in romance novels, the ones where everything good happens. But they proved that impossible can be possible."
You lifted your head off of Jin's shoulder to look up at him. Every struggle was worth it knowing he was yours forever and always. After trying to battle canceled flights, time differences, and missed calls - you two made it. You defied the odds to get to this moment where you two are officially Mr. and Mrs. Kim Seokjin.
"I love you, Mrs. Kim,' he whispered. "And I love you, my handsome Mr. Kim," you giggled.
He grinned wide before pressing his lips to yours lingeringly. You lost count of how many times he kissed you tonight, but he just couldn't get enough of the feeling of it. The way your lips felt against his, how soft they were - how each kiss felt like the first kiss.
He was devoted to you and you were devoted him. Now, you just proved everyone wrong with what you two knew this whole time.
There was nobody else for you but Kim Seokjin.
148 notes · View notes
daechwitatamic · 10 months
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1. Asterism || KSJ
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(banner by @itaeewon)
Title: Amalthea (Masterpost) - Part 1: Asterism
Rating: NSFW - minors go away i mean it Genre: best friend's older brother!au, angst smut fluff trifecta Pairing: Seokjin x female reader Beta team: @yoongiphoria, @here2bbtstrash, @kookstempo
Summary: You can count on two things in life. One: that your lifelong best friend Minji will always be there for you, in your corner, your brightest star. Two: that you'll never be free from her older brother Seokjin's orbit - the gravitational pull is just too strong.
Warnings: language, drinking, angst, kissing, fingering, explicit protected s*x WC: 9.5k
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Part 1: Asterism Asterism: (noun) a recognizable pattern of stars that does not make up the full constellation
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Things start when your mother texts you asking for a favor.
To be more historically accurate, things started when you were a child. But for the sake of brevity, for a tighter focus on the now, it starts with this text -
[5:41 PM] Mom: can you do me a big favor?
When you send her back “sure”, she calls you, which you expected all along. You’re surprised she texted first at all, instead of going straight to the phone call. She’s a creature of habit, your mother. 
“I cooked a few dishes and stuck them in the fridge,” she tells you. Pacing across your own kitchen, a fifteen minute drive from her place, you squint as you pass through the one exact spot where the afternoon sunlight assaults you from the window every day around this time. You’ve lived here for years - you’ve just been too lazy to put curtains up in this room. Your mother continues, her voice coming through your phone so loudly that you can hold it like it’s on speaker (although it’s not) and still hear her loud and clear. “You’ll see them, they’re in the tupperware with blue lids? Can you bring them over to the Kims’?”
“What?” you say - not because you didn’t understand the directions, but because you didn’t understand the why. She starts to repeat herself but you cut her off, clarifying, “Why are you making food for the Kims?”
“Didn’t I tell you?” she asks. “Or at least Minji? Mr. Kim had his knee replacement today.”
You call Minji from the car, but she doesn’t answer. You’ve been best friends since kindergarten; her dad’s house is just across the street from the one you’d grown up in, where your parents still live. You kids have all grown up, and away - you, Minji, and her two brothers - but Mr. Kim still lives in that same house, the light blue one that you can see from your childhood bedroom window. 
You still live close, and Minji’s just a few towns over. Her brothers moved far - requiring planes and trains to get back. You see Minji at least monthly, if not more often - usually you meet for brunch at a place between your houses. Sometimes, though, you meet back home home - for holidays, usually. The last time you were at her dad’s house with her was for the winter holidays two years ago; you’d rung in the New Year on her back deck. 
You try not to think about that night. 
You let yourself into your parents’ empty house with the code and head straight for the kitchen. As promised, there’s a small stack of blue-lidded containers, and you load them into a reusable grocery bag you steal from the cabinet beneath the sink. You lock the house back up and head across the street on foot. 
Once upon a time - for most of your life, really - you would have just let yourself in. You and Minji grew up in each other’s homes. This was your second home, her dad your second father. It had been like that your whole life. But once you and Minji went away to college, things changed - just slightly. Part of it’s just becoming an adult. You don’t barge in anymore, you knock. 
You expect Minji, or maybe one of her aunts if they’ve come to help, to answer the door. Instead, it swings open to reveal her older brother, Seokjin - full lips frowning slightly, strong brow furrowed as he tries to piece together why you’re standing on his father’s doorstep holding a grocery bag. 
The moment stretches, stills. It can go one of two ways - you can let it be awkward, or you can be sure that it isn’t.
“Hi,” you say, hoping it sounds breezy. “My mom cooked some dishes for you.”
Seokjin takes a minute step backwards, lips parting to speak, but then you hear your name squealed from over his shoulder and you brace yourself for impact. 
Jin acts fast, grabbing the bag of food from you and flattening himself against his open front door as Minji launches herself past him to hug you, laughing.
“I called you on my way over!” you scold her, smiling, hugging her tightly back. 
“Sorry!” she says, still holding you, still laughing. Jin’s still holding your food, just to the side of you, watching this display with a blank face. “I was helping my dad lay down. I left my phone in the kitchen, I think? You should see his knee, it’s disgusting. Is that food?”
She releases you and turns, heading through the house towards their roomy kitchen. You know you’re expected to follow. You reach to take the food back from Jin, shooting him a thankful smile. Your fingers brush as you take the bag, and you drop your gaze, hurrying to follow the sound of Minji’s voice as it floats through the house. Seokjin stands in place as you leave, and you hope he doesn’t see you shudder against goosebumps as you hurry away.
He’s had that effect on you since you were fourteen years old.
But that’s ancient history.
There’s a lot you want to ask him, starting with how long he’ll be in town, ending with… well. Not now. 
In the kitchen, Minji is trying to make room in the fridge for everything your mom sent over. You sit at the table, watching her absently, answering whenever her chatter pauses to ask you something. 
Jin joins you two wordlessly. He reaches over Minji’s head and then turns and holds out a beer bottle, offering it to you.
“Ooh, yes please,” you say, taking it from him. Minji looks up to see what you’re talking about and then nudges Jin’s shin - which is next to her head - to indicate that she wants one too. He sits across the table from you and sets a beer for Minji at the seat to his right. When she’s done in the fridge, she sits heavily next to her brother and they both look at you as they drink.
“So,” you say, because you have to say something about now, have to keep yourself from getting swept up in twenty-something years of memories that this house holds for you. “How’d the surgery go?”
“Great!” Minji beams. “The surgeons said it was exactly as expected. He’ll start physical therapy next week.”
“I’m glad to hear it,” you tell her genuinely. Mr. Kim was always important to you. You turn your attention to Jin, who’s downed half of his beer already. “Are you staying long?”
He nods, swallows, then answers. “A few weeks, probably,” he tells you. “I got approval to work remotely through the end of the month. Hopefully by then he’ll be back to a point where he doesn’t need someone here 24/7, and Minji can just pop in on him…” 
He trails off, his eyes going over your shoulder, watching a few birds hop from the bird feeder to the deck railing. The deck railing where you’d hung wet bathing suits to dry on never-ending summer afternoons, where you’d placed soda cans with rivulets of condensation running down their sides, where you’d leaned with Minji as you talked about boys and school and boys again, where you’d buried your hands in Seokjin’s hair as he’d - nope. 
Not going there. Not unless you want to drown.
“Do you want to eat dinner with us?” Minji asks, throwing you a life preserver by dragging you back to the present. 
“Ah,” you say, letting your regretful tone do the answering for you. “I’d like to, but… I should get home.”
I should get out of this house, you think. I should get away from your brother. 
She grins at you slyly. “Got that man to feed?”
You laugh in surprise. Seokjin is suddenly very interested in the label on the beer he’s almost finished. 
“No,” you say. “He’s out of the picture.”
Minji narrows her eyes at you, assessing. “We don’t seem sad,” she observes finally. 
You shake your head. “We aren’t sad,” you confirm. Jin gets up wordlessly and opens the fridge again, reaching for a second beer. His shoulders take up almost the whole space. You try not to notice, try not to think about the muscles of those shoulders rippling under your fingertips - enough. Enough, now.
You stand, needing the escape, needing to get away, draining the rest of your beer in one long drag that would make your college-self proud.
“Listen,” you say to the room at large, to both of them, after placing the empty bottle back on the table, “call me if you need help, okay? My place isn’t far. I can pop over if you need an extra pair of hands, or a break, or some errands handled. Okay?”
Seokjin’s still hiding in the refrigerator, taking a million years to choose between two of the same beer. Minji, oblivious, takes your hand gratefully.
“Thank you,” she says warmly, giving you a squeeze. 
You start to head back towards the front door, Minji still clutching your hand. 
“Bye, Seokjin,” you say over your shoulder.
He glances up at you around the open refrigerator door.
“See you,” he says. There’s something hollow in his voice. 
You get it, though. 
The last time the three of you were here together, two years ago, he’d welcomed in the New Year buried inside you against the back of their house, gasping your name against the inky dark of the frigid December night.
You’ve never told a soul, and you don’t think he has, either.
You’ve never talked about it at all.
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You and Minji spent New Year's Eve out at bars and clubs together almost every year. The year you were twenty-six, though, something had changed. Suddenly, the idea of vying for bar space, in heels, for overpriced drinks and sleazy dudes seemed abysmal. 
“We could stay in,” Minji had suggested. “Pretend we’re sixteen, sneaking booze into dad’s basement again? Seokjin is back in town for the week because he dumped that shitty girlfriend of his for the sixth time, might be kind of fun to all hang out.”
You’d pretended to dislike the idea, grimacing a little as you thought it over. Your brain snagged on dumped his shitty girlfriend. 
“Come on,” she’d said cajolingly. “We can put on 90’s music and play card games, like we used to.”
You knew the whole time that you’d go; all you needed to know was that Seokjin would be there. Since he’d left for college, he only came home twice a year - Christmas holidays, and over summer breaks. Since he'd moved far, even those weren't promised.
Minji ended up with a small crowd - a few that you were friends with in high school, but most of them you thought were friends of her brothers. 
You’d spent most of the night trying to avoid staring at Jin - or at least avoid getting caught staring. It had been about two years since you’d seen him last - four years since he moved away. He was twenty-eight to your twenty-six that year, and you weren’t sure if it was the way he was aging or if it was the tequila, but he seemed - somehow - even more handsome than you remembered. 
It had gotten more and more difficult as the night went on to focus - on conversations, on card games, on how to balance as you walked; your brain wanted to spend its energy cataloging the quirk of his full lips when you said something funny, his windshield-wiper laugh when Minji dropped a whole tray of lemon slices she’d spent twenty minutes cutting, the strip of bare skin his shirt revealed when he bent down to help her pick them up. It was like your brain was trying to soak up every little detail of him that it could after so many years of distance, of him being somebody you used to be close to.
Eventually, you’d retreated to the back deck, alone, just minutes before midnight. Outside, the noise of the party fell away, and you took in deep gulps of cold air, your hands gripping the splintery wood of the railing. 
When the door opened behind you, you expected Minji. Instead, Seokjin stood there, staring at you like he’d asked you a question and was waiting for an answer. 
Maybe, in his own way, he had. Maybe it had been all the quick glances he’d given you that night. Maybe it had been the way he’d stuck close, listening when you talked, smiling wryly when you cracked jokes. Maybe it had been the way his eyes had followed you from room to room, the way his fingers had tightened around his glass when you bent down to grab one of the wayward lemon slices.
You’d stared back at him, unsure what the right move was. This was Minji’s brother, and you’d promised her almost fifteen years ago to never get tangled up with her family. This was Minji’s brother, who had bought you girls beer before you were old enough, who had once driven to pick you up from the mall on a rainy day when your date had gone badly. This was Minji’s brother who’d once held your hand in the backseat of your dad’s car as you sobbed over a broken wrist, who’d often let you sit and watch him play video games even after he’d told Minji to bug off and leave him alone.
This was Seokjin, who was staring at you so intently that for a moment you weren’t sure if he hadn’t asked you something.
“Seokjin?”
His eyes met yours.
“Explain to me how you got even more beautiful?” he’d murmured, and your heart had leapt into your throat.
“I - what?”
He was close enough to touch. You’d dreamed of this for so long - pathetically long, really. You’d never dreamed that he’d want you.
He stepped closer, and you did touch him - one hand acted without permission, coming up and resting lightly on his chest, over his heart. It had thumped beneath your tentative fingers. 
Your fingers had curled in the material of the thick hoodie he’d been wearing, had pulled him just closer.
And then his mouth was on yours, searing, and your hands were in his hair, and that deck railing was pressing into your lower back as he pinned you against it, and one of his hands was creeping beneath the hem of your shirt, and you could feel him hardening against your lower stomach, and -
And through the window, you could see the party carrying on.
You broke the kiss, pushed gently on his forearm to extract his sneaky hand from inside your shirt.
“They can see us,” you’d gasped, and he’d followed your gaze somewhat dumbly, like it hadn’t occurred to him that everyone else existed in the same place as the two of you.
Then he’d taken your hand, pulling you down the deck steps, away from the glow of light from the house’s windows, down into the darkness, where witnesses would have to work a little harder to see what was going on.
He’d pressed you against the wall of the house, beneath the deck, and as you’d tipped your head back to allow him access to nip and soothe lines up and down your neck you’d thought of all the summer nights you’d spent in this exact spot. This is where the keg usually goes, you’d thought absently as that sneaky hand returned to the bare skin of your belly beneath your sweater.
You hadn’t felt even remotely cold, despite the threat of snow in the air. 
You’d kissed until your lips hurt and you wanted it to hurt just a little more, your hands starting to toy with the waistband of his jeans as his thumb rubbed determined circles around your puckered nipple beneath the fabric of your bra. 
“Tell me what you want,” he’d said, the words mumbled against your lips. He’d pulled back just enough, just enough to watch your face as you told him -
“Anything. Everything. All of it… all of you.”
His hand had traveled up the back of your thigh, beneath your skirt, fingers pushing the cotton of your panties aside before stroking through your center. You’d moaned, low, aware that anyone could come out onto the deck above you without warning. His breath had hitched in response, and his hand had left your pussy long enough to tug you to him again, pressing you against his hips for just a second before returning. This time he didn’t toy with you, pressing his index finger into your messy heat, followed quickly by a second digit.
You’d mouthed his name against his jaw, trying to keep yourself upright as he pressed you against the brick of the house, as he pumped his fingers leisurely, fingertips rubbing circles against your front wall until he found the place that made you gasp and buck against his hand. He’d laughed, asked, “Yeah?” in a cocky voice you’d never heard on him before. It’d made you, impossibly, wetter. 
“You’re so fucking hot,” you’d whispered, half delirious, and he’d laughed again, like he knew already.
There had been a flash of foil between his teeth, the sound of his zipper echoing across the frozen backyard, and then he was pushing inside you, fingers still wet from you now gripping your hip to keep you in place. 
You’d groaned in unison as he slowly bottomed out. The brick had bit at your back, the winter air had bit at your face, and Seokjin had bit at your lower lip as he pounded into you steadily. 
It had been hurried. It had been hushed. 
Your name on his lips when he came took the air from your lungs.
You’d wanted this, wanted him, in silence for as long as you could remember. Before you had words to put to it, before you were old enough to understand why your stomach hurt when he left the room. 
It had hurt, after. The scrapes from the brick wall. Your sore hamstrings. Your chapped, cracking lips. 
His silence.
You’d both missed the countdown. Happy New Year.
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You don’t know what you had expected after seeing Seokjin at his dad’s house unexpectedly. Apparently, some foolish part of your subconscious thought he’d reach out to you, because you find yourself disappointed when he doesn’t.
Stupid, you think. I don’t know what you were thinking. Aside from that one slip on New Year’s Eve two years ago, you’d done a stellar job at orbiting Seokjin in silence, keeping your feelings under control and out of sight, never pushing yourself into his path but never letting him stray so far as to forget you, either. Nothing’s changed. 
You tell yourself this for two days, until Minji’s name lights up your phone as you’re packing up from work on Thursday evening, your stomach growling and your feet aching to get out of their heels. 
“Yeeees?” you answer her as you power down your laptop and cast your gaze around your cubicle for anything else that needs to come home with you.
“Are you still at work?” she asks, sounding a little breathless, a little irritated.
“Packing up right now,” you tell her, rising and pulling your bag onto your shoulder. You give Dale, your cubicle-mate, a silent wave goodbye and head for the elevators. “What’s up?”
“I tried your mom first, but your parents are apparently out to dinner tonight,” she says. “Is there any way you can swing by my dad’s? I think Seokjin is having a hard time with dad, and I’m stuck here at least another two hours -.”
“No problem,” you tell her, cutting off her explanation. It isn’t needed. “I’ll head there now. Tell him I’ll be like…” You glance at your watch for the time, “...twenty-five minutes, tops, if traffic is bad.”
“You’re a saint,” she breathes in relief. “Thank you. Seriously, thank you. I’ll get there as soon as I can. I promise I’ll hurry. Did I tell you that deal with Mr. Lee fell through? I have been non-stop -”
“Don’t worry about it,” you tell her, meaning it. “I’m happy to help. I’ll be there soon. See you later, okay?”
You grew up on a dead end. You never tell people that, now. You always fancy it up if it’s brought up in conversation - you call it a cul-de-sac, though it isn’t according to the yellow sign that marks where you turn left to reach your parents’ house. 
Every inch of this street is steeped in memories for you - memories of growing up with Minji and Seokjin, running wild through these streets whenever the weather allowed it, learning to ride a bike, having snowball fights and water balloon fights and - once - even a foodfight. Thinking of your childhood with those two, you think mostly of chaos and laughter. 
You miss it, a little, and that’s only a little bit nostalgia talking. Maybe the lack of chaos is nice, but the lack of laughter kind of sucks. 
It takes Seokjin forever to answer the door when you knock. When he does, it’s evident immediately why Minji had called for backup. 
He’s sick as a dog; his nose is red, cheeks flushed, eyes glassy and sleepy. 
“Minji sent me,” you explain. “She said you need help with your dad.”
“I don’t,” he protests, just a little whiny. “We’re fine. Why’d she call you? I told her we were fine.”
This clear untruth is punctuated by a fit of coughing. You purse your lips and raise an eyebrow, waiting. 
He shakes his head, recovering. “It’s just a cold,” he says, doubling down. “I’m sorry you drove all the way here, but I don’t need help. I was just about to help Dad get showered - I need to get back up there, he’s waiting.”
He starts to turn to go, but you reach out, catching his sleeve. He turns, brows furrowing in frustration, but you cut him off.
“Jin,” you say seriously, “come on. I came here to help. What needs to be done? Do you want me to start heating up dinner while he showers?”
He sags back against the wall behind him, raising one hand to rub wearily over his brow, his eyes, down over his mouth. You let his sleeve slip between your fingers and you wait as his resolve cracks. 
He sighs heavily, eyeing the ceiling. “Could you strip his bed and put on clean blankets? So when he’s done showering, I can put him back in a clean bed?”
“Absolutely,” you say, relieved that he’s delegated a task. He leads you upstairs silently. Your feet remember the way to Mr. Kim’s bedroom. You weren’t often allowed to play in there as kids, but you have to pass it to get to Minji’s room; you think you could walk the path in your sleep.
Halfway up the stairs, you pause, stopping by one of the dozens of framed photos on the wall. You smile, putting your finger on the glass. 
At the top of the stairs Seokjin pauses, turns to see why you stopped. Something on his face softens when he sees. 
“Yeah,” he says. “That one’s still up.”
You give him a small smile. The photo your finger rests on is a group shot with blue water meeting blue sky as the backdrop. 
Mr. Kim stands in the middle, beaming, one arm around Minji and the other around Seokjin. Minji’s little brother Jungkook - only a year behind you girls in school - sits on the ground at Seokjin’s feet, grinning with a scrunched nose. You’re behind Minji, peeking around her shoulders, your eyes closed as you laugh. You’re all kids in the picture - Seokjin, as the oldest, is probably around ten. 
You’d been shy to be included in the picture, but Mr. Kim had told you that you were one of his kids in spirit if nothing else. You’d all been at the lake that day. Seokjin had been the one who made you and Jungkook laugh as the camera snapped. You remember it like it was yesterday. After the picture had been taken, you girls and Seokjin had dug a hole in the sand and buried Jungkook up to his neck. You’d splashed in the water, squealing over the slimy rocks that lined the lake’s floor. Later, you’d all eaten thick slices of watermelon, the juice dripping on your bare legs as the summer sun set over the horizon, the four of you sitting in a row on the picnic table bench like a matched set. You’d chased fireflies until Mr. Kim called your names, ready to pack you all into the car to return home, smelling like sunscreen and lakewater. 
It was one of your favorite memories, that whole day. 
You strip the blankets and sheets from Mr. Kim’s bed and toss them in the hamper. You collect a clean set from the linen closet in the hallway without needing to be told where they are. You spent as much time in this house as your own growing up. In the ensuite, you can hear the shower running, the low murmur of both men’s voices as they chat. You make the bed, fluffing the comforter, and then take the hamper down to the basement, where you dump them into the washer and get it started. 
When you head back upstairs, Seokjin is in the living room, slumped sideways on the couch, eyes closed. You’re not sure if he’s awake, if he knows you’re standing behind him. He has that hand pressed to his brow again, and you know a headache when you see it. 
You pad quietly up the stairs and into the hallway bathroom, where Mr. Kim used to keep all the over-the-counter stuff - bandaids, pain-killers, lozenges, even tampons back when Minji still lived here. 
Heading back downstairs, you grab a glass of water from the kitchen and find Seokjin exactly where you left him, pressing his face pitifully into the arm of the couch.
You nudge him gently, and hold out your offerings - fever reducer and the water. 
He grumbles as he takes them, pushing himself to a more upright position so he can drink from the glass without spilling.
When he sets the glass down, he looks over at you somewhat warily. “How have you been?” he asks, and there’s something resigned in his voice. Something defeated. You wonder what battle he’s lost, to make him sound like that. You feel - have always felt - that so much of what goes on in Jin’s mind is kept behind the curtain. For someone so loud, he’s the most private person you know.
“I’ve been fine,” you shrug. “Normal.”
He looks sideways at you for a long moment. “Is that a lie?” he asks finally, voice low. 
“No,” you say, trying to keep your voice light. It isn’t, right? You’ve been fine. What happened between you was two entire years ago, the lid closing tightly on a lifetime of maybes. You’d had your moment together and it hadn’t led to anything. What choice did you have, but to accept it and move on? So, there you have it. You’ve been fine.
You make the decision, right there, not to bring it up - what happened two years ago. His lips on yours, his body under your hands, the way your legs had trembled as they’d struggled to hold you up. Better to let it stay dead. If Seokjin had wanted to talk about it, he’s had two years and four months to do so. If he wants to pretend he didn’t fuck his sister’s best friend and then ghost her completely, who are you to mess with the plan? 
You need something sweet; you’re far too bitter.
But honestly, you can’t even hate him for it. He hadn’t promised you a thing, so logically there’s no reason to feel like a toy played with and discarded - even if you’re left wishing he had never picked you up to play with at all.
You look him over, taking in the sheen of sweat on his brow, the haze you can still see in his eyes. “You look like shit,” you tell him.
He lets out a single puff of a laugh, his eyes closed. “Now I know you’re lying,” he says, lips quirking into a smile. 
“You look like you have the flu,” you say flatly, ignoring his nonsense. 
“It’s just a cold,” he says.
You lapse into silence. He keeps his eyes closed, that hand still resting on his head. Finally, you say, “How about you? How’ve you been?”
He shrugs. “Been fine. Working. You know.”
A tiny smile tugs on your lips. “What are we playing these days?”
The smile creeps sideways across his face and he opens his eyes to actually look at you, sending you a conspiratory smirk. “Now you’re asking the right questions,” he says, and starts to tell you about a console game he got last week. 
You head to the basement when it’s time and move the sheets you were washing into the dryer. You pause in the doorway when you return upstairs, looking Seokjin over from afar. He looks better than he had when you’d arrived - eyes less glassy, cheeks less pink. 
“I think your fever’s down,” you say, as you return to where you’d been sitting before.
“I feel better than I did,” he agrees. He looks at you appraisingly, like he’s seeing you clearly for the first time. And, considering the fever, maybe he is. “So Minji said you live pretty close?”
You nod. “Not far. That apartment complex over behind the plaza with the grocery store? You remember, the one that we used to go trick-or-treating at?”
“Wow,” he says, giving an appreciative whistle. “Those are swanky.”
“I’m swanky these days,” you joke, smiling. 
Just then, there’s a soft beep from outside - someone locking their car.
“That’s Minji,” Seokjin observes, and you find yourself standing, feet carrying you towards the kitchen. 
“Do you need anything to drink?” you call over your shoulder. Jin is watching your sudden departure, clearly bemused. You busy yourself in their fridge, even though you don’t have a real reason to. You just didn’t want Minji to enter the house and find you and Jin having domestic hours on the living room couch.
The front door opens, and Minji calls your name through the house.
“I’m in here!” you call back, and head for the doorway of the kitchen. 
Minji hurries to you, setting her bags down on the kitchen floor and flopping dramatically onto the doorjamb. 
“I am so sorry,” she says. “Thank you so much for coming over.”
“Your brother’s sick,” you tell her flatly. “He had a pretty high fever when I got here.”
Her eyes widen, and she turns to look over her shoulder at Seokjin, who gives her a cheery thumbs up. 
“He says he’s fine,” you inform her, “but he’s got about two more hours before the fever-reducer wears off and then he’s gonna be useless again.”
“Thank you for the warning,” she tells you, while Seokjin squawks from the living room, “I am not, and have never been, useless!” 
You give Minji a quick hug goodbye and head for the front door. 
You meet Seokjin’s eyes as you pass through the living room. They’re sharp, now that the fever’s receded, locked on you and looking. 
“Feel better,” you tell him. “Make sure you hydrate.”
“Hey,” he says, making himself comfortable against the couch cushions, “thanks.” Then, an afterthought - “Seriously. Thank you.”
You give him a tight smile and slip out the front door.
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Going home doesn’t stop you from worrying, even though you know Minji is home and capable of taking care of everything. But at work the next day, your eyes keep darting to your phone screen, as if you’re expecting updates on how Jin is feeling, if everything is okay at the house. 
No one texts you. 
You can’t ask Minji. She’s too fucking smart. If you so much as said, “Hey, is your brother feeling better?” she’d be all over it. 
You try your mom instead, texting her, “How’s Mr. Kim doing? Any updates?” 
She answers, “Haven’t heard anything!”
You groan, tapping the corner of your phone on your desk in frustration. You try to focus on work for a little bit, but it’s truly a lost cause. With a defeated sigh, you open your phone and thumb through your contacts. 
Kim Seokjin. 
You’ve had his number in your phone since you got it - your mom was the one who programmed it in for you when you were fourteen, citing Jin as someone you could call if you had an emergency. As if by being two years your senior, he qualified as a helpful adult. 
You haven’t used his number in over five years - not since you were still in college, probably. 
Actually, you realize, you remember the last time - though there were definitely parts of the night you didn’t remember. 
It was your senior year, the first weekend of December, and you and Minji were drinking in some girl’s dorm. You’d never even met this girl before, but there you were, perched on her desk with a bottle of flavored vodka in hand, watching her LEDs change color along the ceiling.
You and Minji were both wasted, even though it was relatively early - not even midnight yet. You leaned against each other, holding the other up, both of you giggling and tapping around on your phones as the conversation flowed around you.
That’s what had happened - you’d noticed it was about to be midnight, the clock about to change from 11:59. And despite being so drunk that Minji was mostly propping you up, so drunk that you had to close one eye to read the letters of this girl’s alarm clock, so drunk that you’d be throwing up in just minutes - a little part of you brain informed you that midnight meant it was officially December 4th. 
You’d texted Seokjin happy birthday at exactly midnight, one eye closed to make sure you were typing actual words. He was hundreds of miles away, had graduated and moved out already, and you hadn’t talked since the day the Kims had loaded all of his shit into a rented moving van, about five months ago. 
And he’d answered - “thank you! what are you doing up??”
To which you’d replied, “getting baja blasted with your sister” and he’d replied, “i do not want to know, thank you!!”
And then Minji had looked at you drunkenly and narrowed her eyes. “Who are you texting with that smile?”
The floor had swooped below your feet, and you’d run for the bathroom. Minji had forgotten about interrogating you, and you and Seokjin had never texted again.
Now, at your job, you stare at his name on your phone screen, wracked with indecision. 
“This is ridiculous,” you finally sigh. Behind you, Dale glances over his shoulder to determine if you’re talking to him or yourself. Ignoring Dale, you tap Seokjin’s name and type, “how are you feeling today?”
You don’t even have time to feel nervous about it - his response is almost instantaneous. He sends you a picture of a gaming screen, where he’s clearly playing a shooter POV. He follows it up with the sunglasses emoji. You laugh out loud, trying to keep your chuckles quiet to avoid calling attention to your cubicle. 
“What a nerd,” you mutter affectionately. You type back, “you must be fine then 🙄”. 
Seokjin’s played video games his whole life; it’s one thing you do know about him. How many hours of your childhood had been spent with him, Jungkook, and Minji crowded around the tv in their basement, fighting over whose turn it was to play?Usually Seokjin got to play the first controller (since he was older, stronger, and technically the console belonged to him), which left you and Minji and Jungkook to fight it out over the second one.
But you remember other times, too - especially as you got older - when you’d just sit in silence and watch him play. By the time you were a teenager - fourteen to Jin’s sixteen - Minji was over wanting to join him. She’d argue for use of the tv, and when she lost she’d flounce upstairs to her room to sulk about it. Sometimes you’d join her - usually, you’d join her. But sometimes you’d cast a glance at Seokjin, see if you were welcome. He’d always play it the same - look at you sideways, give you a tiny nod, pat the couch behind him like an invitation. (Seokjin played video games from the floor, letting the base of the couch prop him up. He said he focused better that way.) 
You’d sit, quiet, watching him work the controls, listening to him whine and groan and complain and shout his way through each map. And you’d feel special, because he let you stay after he’d told Minji to fuck off, because he didn’t mind your presence, because sometimes he’d ask if you wanted him to teach you how, even though you always said no thanks. 
You text your mom and ask what she’s making for dinner.
“Why?” she sends back. “Are you asking me to feed you?”
“Maybe,” you send back. 
You join your parents for dinner, “just because”. It’s not that uncommon for you to join them for a meal now and then, considering how close you live. You go because you love your parents and you want a home-cooked meal - definitely not because you know it puts you back in proximity to Jin.
Your mom glances up at you from across the table approximately every four-tenths of a second through the entire meal, until finally you slap your palm on the table and snap, “What?”
She purses her lips, amused. “Nothing,” she says, feigning innocence. “We just don’t usually see you on Friday nights.”
“Jagi,” your dad warns, his voice full of affection. Like he knows it’s a lost cause but he thinks he should try to rein her in for your sake. 
“I’m just saying!” she says, still all innocence, eyes wide. “I’m not complaining! It’s nice to have you here.”
You grumble a response, aggravated that she seems to be onto you. To escape their scrutiny, you rise and move to bag up the full garbage, tying the top of the bag and heading out to the trash cans at the end of the driveway. 
You pause there after hefting the bag up and into the bin, taking a second to breathe. It’s a nice night - the sun has mostly set, the sky deep and dark above you but still clinging to shades of pink down near the horizon. It’s warm, too, for April. 
You’re standing there, arms crossed, watching the sky inch closer and closer to darkness, when you hear a door shut across the street. Your eyes follow the sound immediately, and you see a man’s silhouette do the same thing you were doing - make its way down the driveway, a trash bag in hand. 
Romantic, you think wryly. A garbage date. You stay rooted to the spot, watching as Jin - just an outline, a shadow - tosses the bag into the bin and brushes off his hands. Then, he stops still, seeming to notice you.
You hold your breath, not sure how this will go, and then he starts to lope over, and you exhale in a whoosh.
“Hi,” he says simply, as he gets close enough that you can finally see his face through the dark.
“Hi,” you say around a tiny smile. “You seem better today.”
He scoffs. “I told you it was just a cold. I just needed to sleep it off.”
“I’m glad,” you tell him softly. Maybe it’s dangerous, maybe it’s stupid - to be soft with him. To act like you didn’t already get your answer from him, years ago. To pretend your affection for him is still as pure and untainted as it was when you were a teenager. 
But it feels safer, out here, away from his dad’s house. In there, the memories of that New Year’s Eve are too fresh, too strong - they cling to the air, slide down the walls. The heating unit sighs to life and you hear your own sighs as Seokjin’s fingers danced along your bare skin. The refrigerator grumbles and you hear the grumble of pleasure that originated low in Seokjin’s throat as he felt you squeeze around his fingers. Someone’s footsteps crunch gravel outside, and you hear the crunch of gravel as Seokjin made his way back to the front of the house in the dark, leaving you hidden in shadows, clutching the bricks and gasping for breath.
It’s better out here. In the fresh air, away from that house, the memories are looser, less focused - bike races, raucous laughter, chalk drawings, bouncing beams of light from flashlight tag.
“Thank you for the help yesterday,” he says, rubbing the back of his neck like he does when he’s embarrassed. “I know I kind of gave you a hard time.”
“You didn’t,” you say, letting him off the hook. You’ll always let him off the hook, for everything. You always have. “How’s your dad?”
He glances back at the house over his shoulder, like he needs to verify this answer before giving it. “Not so good today,” he admits. “He’s in a lot more pain, starting to get frustrated needing so much help.”
“Hmm,” you deadpan. “A Kim man who gets frustrated at needing help. Interesting.”
Seokjin laughs, full from his belly. “Shut up,” he says, but there’s no ire in it. “Can I help it if I’m a chip off the ol’ block?”
“We’re supposed to learn from our parents’ mistakes,” you tell him, like a reminder. “Not continue them.”
Just then, a car turns around the corner, the headlights casting you in blinding white light before throwing you back into shadow. You both turn to look - since it’s a dead end, traffic doesn’t just pass through here. 
You recognize the car - it’s Minji’s. She parks and pops out, calling hello to you, ignoring her brother. He makes a face at you like, what am I, chopped liver? 
“I have your mom’s tupperwares, do you want to take them?” she asks, pressing the lock button on her key fob and making the car behind her beep once, loudly. 
“Sure,” you say, following her into the house. A glance over your shoulder tells you that Seokjin is following, too, a few feet behind you, his hands in his pockets. 
Inside, Mr. Kim is sitting sideways on the couch, his leg propped up on a small stack of pillows, a bag of ice over his knee. He perks up when he sees you, lowering his phone away from his face and pushing his spectacles further up his nose. 
“How are you, sweetheart?” he asks. “I’d come hug you, but -.” He gestures at his leg.
“I’m doing fine,” you assure him. “I heard you had a rough day today.”
Mr. Kim shoots a dark look at his son, who looks innocently at the ceiling. “Just a little pain today,” Mr. Kim demures.
Seokjin glances at his phone. “We might want to get you upstairs soon,” he tells his father. “You know you’ll be asleep in about fifteen minutes, so unless you want to spend the night on the couch…”
You watch, feeling awkward and unable to help, as Seokjin helps his dad swivel and stand, an arm over Seokjin’s shoulders. They make their way slowly and laboriously up the stairs, and you feel a little anxious watching. 
“Are they okay?” you ask Minji as she returns from the kitchen, pushing your mother’s empty tupperware back into your hands.
“They’re fine,” she says easily. “It takes a while but they’ve got it down to a science. Hey, listen, do you want to go grab a drink? It’s Friday, and I’ve had a hell of a week, and what I would really like to do is Uber into town and drink like college-Minji.”
You laugh at this. “I’m not sure I’m prepared for the return of college-Minji.”
“Pleaaaaaaaase?” she begs, blinking her lashes at you. “We haven’t gone out together in ages.”
“Alright, alright,” you laugh. “Let me go tell my parents goodbye and drive home and change. Text me the details and I’ll meet you there.”
“Yessss!” she cries, dancing in place a little. You feel a swell of affection for her; you love Minji with your whole heart. You’ve been through a lot together. You’ve been through a lot separately, but always side by side.
There have been many times through your life where you felt like you were clutching Minji’s hand through the fire. 
You still remember clearly the way she’d bounded up to your locker, back when you were thirteen, squealing and excited because the most popular girl in your year had asked her for her number, had invited her over. 
You still remember clearly Minji sobbing on your bed weeks later when it came to light that the girl - who wouldn’t be the last to try - was just trying to get an “in” with Minji’s hot older brother.
“You know I would never, right?” you’d promised her. Stupid, at fourteen, not clarifying that you mean never use you to get to him. Stupid, because then you were sixteen and then eighteen and then twenty-one and then twenty-six and you weren’t sure what you had actually promised - had Minji heard it as I would never get involved with him? 
“I know,” she’d sobbed, reaching one hand blindly to clutch at yours. “I know you wouldn’t.”
And now you’re twenty-eight and the secrets you’ve kept keep piling up - each day you loved him, another pebble atop the pile. The slightest shake could topple the tower, and you’d be absolutely buried. 
You could never let Minji know you loved him. Not when you were fifteen and he was untouchable. Not when you were twenty, and he was the best part of coming home. Not when you were twenty-six, pressed between him and the deck railing. 
Not now, after two years of existing outside his orbit again. 
The bar she picks is small, but quiet - quiet enough that you can actually carry on a conversation from opposite sides of a wooden booth, which is exactly what you do.
What you hadn’t banked on was that Seokjin would join her, sitting on her side of the booth, complaining loudly that he’s not going to come out with you two ever again, he’s never been such a third wheel in his life.
“You could have stayed home with dad,” Minji says, giving him a swift elbow to the ribs. “Don’t be such a complainer. You jumped in on my plans.”
“Can we please talk about something besides your hot coworker, then?” he begs. “Anything, anything else.”
“We could talk about my hot coworkers,” you offer, even though you have none. But this - teaming up with Minji to push Seokjin’s buttons - is a song and dance you know by heart, something you’ve done since practically infancy.
He narrows his eyes at you. “Believe it or not, that’s not better,” he deadpans. 
You laugh, knocking back the rest of your drink and sliding out of the booth to go get another, leaving the Kim siblings to bicker in your absence.
You don’t expect Seokjin to follow; you don’t expect him to press up behind you as you stand at the bar, waiting for the bartender’s attention. 
But he does, his body heavy and warm against yours. The blood rushes to your pussy so fast it almost makes you mad. All he’s doing is standing in close proximity, can your body get it together?
“What are you doing?” you murmur, trying not to meet his eyes in the mirrored wall behind the bar.
“Minji wants shots,” he answers easily. Like his body isn’t pressed against yours, like he isn’t causing your heart to hammer against your ribs.
“You’re too close,” you manage to say, because it’s the best option you can think of. Better than she’ll see us. Better than you still aren’t close enough. Better than don’t do this if you’re just going to leave again. 
He does catch your eyes in the mirror, then. He must read something honest on your face, because he shifts sideways, leaving you cold. The bartender comes by, takes both your orders. You take your drink back to the table. Seokjin follows with a tray of bad decisions poured into tiny glasses.
Even though he gave you the reprieve when you asked for it, it’s clear he’s got a mission to ruin you. You’re sure of it, more and more sure as the night wears on. Sure of it when you reach for the same shot glass, your fingers brushing, his lingering. Sure of it when his eyes on your face make you so warm that Minji accuses you of having a drunk flush. Sure of it when his foot hooks around your ankle beneath the table, slides up and down your calf, slow and tantalizing, inches from Minji’s stilettoed feet. Sure of it when this causes your breath to hitch and his fingers tighten around his glass and his gaze goes to the opposite wall, anywhere but towards you.
You’re drunk, but it’s Seokjin that’s sending you spinning. 
You’ve made this mistake before, you remind yourself sternly. Nothing good can come of it. 
You excuse yourself and head for the bathroom, a marked up door at the end of a narrow, poorly lit hallway. You grip the sides of the sink and breathe deep, closing your eyes. The room sways and you press your forehead to the mirror, trying to ground yourself. 
“You cannot fuck him again,” you whisper to yourself, eyes still closed. “It wouldn’t mean anything even if you did.”
The alcohol catches up to you as you whisper these words; the truth of them slam you harder than normal. You blink away tears, taking a few shuddering breaths.
“Time to go home,” you tell yourself firmly, turning off the water and wiping quickly under your eyes in case any makeup ran. 
This is what it means to be in Seokjin’s orbit, now: to crash into each other, to fight with yourself - fight with the truth that he doesn’t want you, and then run away scared until he’s too far away to hurt you again. Spin idly along until the next time your circles cross paths. Do it again.
He’s in the hallway when you emerge, arms crossed as he leans against the wall. You have to pass him to get back to the table. He pushes off the wall when he sees you coming, stumbles a little. A tiny, sensible part of your brain whispers that he might be drunker than you are as you sidle into his personal bubble.
“What are you doing, Seokjin?” you ask him for the second time that night. 
His eyes comb your face. You don’t know what answer he’s looking for, what question he’s secretly asked you in his mind. 
“You tell me,” he retorts, which doesn’t make a lot of sense, but speaking somehow brought him looming closer and you’re drowning in the smell of him, the warmth of him, the desire to feel his body hard against yours again, to feel him split you open again, to have his mouth hot on your skin again -
You close your eyes, sag a little. His hands come to your elbows quickly, holding you up. “You’re confusing me,” you whisper, and then look up at him through your lashes. 
There’s something aching on his face, and then he whispers back, “I’m sorry. Y/N, I’m so sorry - I never meant -.”
The click-clack of high heels approach and round the corner. You and Seokjin leap apart like you’re burned, your arms tingling where his fingers had been.
It’s not Minji. The stranger murmurs an apology and brushes past you both, towards the bathroom.
Spooked, startled out of the moment, you turn to head back to the bar, back to Minji. 
Seokjin grabs your arm, pulls you back. You teeter back a step, then look at him expectantly as you regain your balance.
Seriously, so seriously, he tells you, “I swear, I never wanted to hurt you.” Then he releases your arm with a tiny push, guiding you back out of the dirty hallway and into the light.
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You Uber home alone. You brush your teeth, remove your makeup. You change into pajamas, drink a glass of water. 
You wake up to your phone buzzing incessantly next to your head.
[10:14 AM] Jin 😎: oh [10:14 AM] Jin 😎: my god [10:14 AM] Jin 😎: i think i am dead? [10:15 AM] Jin 😎: are you dead too? are we ghosts? [10:15 AM] Jin 😎: can ghosts throw up??? 🤔
You giggle despite your own headache. 
[10:15 AM] You: whats wrong old man, you can’t hang anymore?? [10:16 AM] Jin 😎: WOW [10:16 AM] You: 😇
You check all your other socials, answer a few emails, and then finally drag yourself out of bed and head for a hot shower. As you stand beneath the hot water, you think about your first hangover, when you were sixteen. 
You’d woken up next to Minji on her basement floor, a hoodie balled up beneath your head like a pillow. You’d closed your eyes again, hoping the splitting pain in your head and the roiling adrenaline in your stomach were a bad dream. 
They were not.
You spent most of the next hour in the basement’s tiny bathroom, curled up on the floor next to your porcelain jail. When you felt like you could stand, you rinsed your mouth and pulled the pillow-hoodie onto your body, taking comfort in the way it swam on you, the hemline brushing your thighs just below your cutoffs. 
You’d made your way upstairs, hoping to sneak past Mr. Kim and your own parents and make it unscathed to your own bed. You wanted nothing but to sleep for the next fourteen hours. Or years. 
You got busted at the top of the stairs. Luckily, it was Seokjin bustling around the kitchen, not his father.
He had taken one look at you and started laughing, low in his belly. “Too much fun?”
“Shut up,” you’d whined, literally covering your ears against the noise. “Or I will throw up again, I promise.”
Jin had smiled at you, open and easy. “Sit down, kid,” he’d said kindly, jerking his head towards the kitchen table. “I have an age-old remedy.” 
And actually? It had worked.
After drying your hair and throwing on some jeans and a t-shirt, you scavenge your kitchen. You have most of what you need, and you toss it all into a tote bag and hunt for your keys. You finally find them on the floor next to the kitchen counter - chances are you’d tossed them at the counter last night and missed - and head out.
Your parents are home when you let yourself in. They both stare at you, baffled, then exchange a sly, knowing look.
“You’re back, I see,” your mom says, something sneaky in her tone.
“Do you have any bean paste?” you answer. “I’m going to go make Minji hangover soup.”
Only one word was a lie.
This makes your mom laugh, and she rummages in her cabinets and helps you complete the list of ingredients you need. 
The Kims’ front door is locked, so you make your way around the side of the house and fish the key out of its hiding spot, letting yourself in the side door that leads to the kitchen. 
The house is still and quiet, and you try not to clang any pots and pans as you get to work. When you finish, over an hour later, you set up the table - a bowl of hangover soup, and a mug of steaming hot coffee, black.
You text Seokjin, “come to the kitchen”, and set your phone back down, turning to start on the dishes. 
You’re informed of his presence by his laugh. You turn, hands red under the hot water and covered in suds, to see him sitting down at the spot you’d set up. He looks up at you, amazed, an uncertain smile playing across his face. 
“It’s an age-old remedy,” you tell him seriously.
“You are…” he trails off with a quiet laugh and reaches for the coffee. 
You’d love to know the end of that sentence. 
When you finish the dishes - save for the pot with the remaining soup, still on the stove for when Minji wakes up - you pour your own mug of coffee and sit across from Jin, watching as he finishes his soup. He closes his eyes and sighs happily, then sets down his spoon reverently.
“Thank you,” he says, like a prayer, but also like a joke. “That was so needed.”
“Consider it payback,” you tell him. 
It feels different, sitting across the kitchen table. Different than sitting across that booth at the bar. Less charged. Like it wasn’t something physical burning between you, like you’d thought, but the need for catharsis, for apology. Even if you don’t know what he’s sorry for, even if you still don’t know what exactly happened with him two years ago.
He’s thinking about it too, apparently. He says your name quietly, and you look up to meet his eyes. You can read the apology all over his face. The house is still still and quiet, no one awake but you and Jin. Like no one exists but you and Jin.
You’ve felt that way before.
Sitting beside him in the basement. In the passenger seat of his car, driving through a rainstorm. In his backyard, in the dark, your breath visible in the air as it leaves your mouth in desperate puffs.
“I kind of wanted to talk,” he admits, and your stomach twists. Maybe you should have had some of the soup. “About -?”
“There’s nothing to talk about,” you say quickly, already standing, already moving to gather up the tote bag you’d used to carry ingredients. You shrug back into your jacket, ignoring Jin’s wide-eyed look of surprise. “I should get going,” you say, still not looking at him. You go back to the kitchen door you’d entered through, picking up the key so you can return it to its hiding place outside. You pause on the threshold, turning, eyeing the stovetop thoughtfully. 
“Tell Minji you made the soup,” you instruct, and then you close the door behind you. 
Next ->
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Thank you so so much for reading - i hope you like this one as much as I do! Please don't feel shy about letting me know what you think!
Part 2: Retrograde will post next Friday, June 2nd. Hope to see you there!
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7ndipity · 9 months
Text
Fights with them
Ot7 x Reader
Summary: what they would be like during fights/arguments
Warnings: a lot of angst, not proofread
A/N: after days of struggling to work(hello executive disfunction) I got this request, and my brain decided to jump back into gear and I wrote this in like an hour, as well as half of another request!? 🤷idk, I'm not gonna question it, I'm just glad I'm writing again.
Masterlist
Requests are open
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Seokjin: as much as he bickers with the members, I think he has a rather avoidant personality when it comes to real conflict. He's said he allergic to seriousness, which can definitely become an issue if not careful, as it can one off as indifferent or dismissive. I think he usually ends up snapping and saying something short but pointed, and then walks away before things can escalate further. Always comes back all apologetic, and tries to work through things more calmly.
Yoongi: He's very upfront and sometimes blunt, and he's said before that he hates getting angry/fighting, so I think most issues would be resolved before they can turn into a full blown fight. But I also think he might have a tendency to ignore/avoid smaller issues until they build up. In the moment, he's not that loud, but he's very sharp with his words. Immediately regrets saying anything that might have hurt you afterwards. Definitely needs some time to himself to think and get his emotions under control, but would want to apologize and resolve everything as quickly as possible.
Hobi: He's almost to open too let a fight brew properly. He'll see it coming be like, "wait, let's step back and sort this out" before it gets out of hand. When they do happen though, he's loud only for a moment, and then the rest of the time, he's unnervingly quiet. As I said in his dating HCs, fights almost always culminate in tears because he can't stand y'all being upset with each other. Like, it causes him physical pain. Makes up the fastest out of all the members.
Namjoon: tbh, I think I would fight with him the most out of the members. He's soo stubborn and passive aggressive. Tries to dismiss the issue to de-escalate the situation, but that almost always backfires. Gets loud and slams things/doors, then gets mad at himself for letting his emotions get the better of him. Definitely needs time to cool off before coming back to talk to you; could be an hour, could be three days, depends on the situation. But he does always come back to talk it out with you.
Jimin: I know several of the big fight stories involve him, but that doesn't necessarily mean that he's overly combative, I just think that when he feels strongly about something, he won't back down, which can be a good thing, until it isn't. If it's a smaller argument, he'll just say something snappish and then move on like nothing happened, but in bigger fights, he can rival Joon on volumeand intensity. He can also hold a grudge like you wouldn't believe, so communication is a super important part of resolving the issue so nothing brews into bitterness.
Taehyung: He has a tendency to get very wrapped up in the moment and take things personally, so even small fights can snowball into something bigger if you're not careful. Yells and tries to put up a tough exterior, but starts to crack pretty quick and will want to leave before his other emotions show too much. Another crier(same). Ultimately, can't stand being away from you for too long, the type that will climb in bed and hold you, but not speak because the wounds are still fresh. Will probably talk it out with you the next morning.
Jungkook: He's such a emotional and overly reactive person, so I see fights being a common occurrence with him tbh. With smaller fights, he stays pretty calm, but when things escalate, he's all over the place. Definitely an angry crier. For some reason, I don't see him really yelling during fights? He's more like Hobi in that, if he does, it only happens in bursts and the rest of the time, his tone is just slightly raised(like when he scolds ppl during lives). Does not like to walk away and wants to sort things out then and there, even though that's probably not the best idea, but he doesn't want to let the tension drag on longer than it has to.
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whyse7vn · 17 days
Text
KIM SEOKJIN
RIGHT:
The moment doesn’t feel real.
You stare up at the white ceiling. The room is dark you can barely see it.
It’s late. How late?
You turn your head to the left a small digital clock now in view.
11:45 PM
It’s late.
The moment doesn’t feel real.
It’s like you’re here but you’re not here.
Your gaze is on the ceiling again. Your laying on your back, fingers intertwined resting on your stomach. Your mind thinks back to the clock.
The clock, there’s a shift in the covers next to you, that’s not your clock. Your eyebrows furrow, there’s another shift.
Oh
right.
That isn’t your clock. This isn’t your bed. You turn your head to the right. His back is to you. This isn’t your house.
“Jin?”
“Mmh?”
His response is instant. He turns around and cuddles into the side of your body. His head now rests in the crook of your neck. You can feel his breath on your skin. His right arm wraps around your torso.
Suddenly you’re hyper aware of everything. The clothes you wear despite being Jin’s and way too big for you, feel as if they’re tightening around your skin. The room feels busy. Your body is hot. The part of Jin’s body that rests ontop of you feels as if it’s burning.
You tell yourself this is normal. The sharing a bed part, the cuddling part. Ten years of friendship makes this normal, for you guys anyways too many secrets shared too many embarrassing moments witnessed to freak out over such trivial things.
Ten years of friendship.
Friendship?
Today felt like anything but ten years of friendship. He had cooked for you
just for you
on valentine’s day. No questions asked no plans made he just did.
He didn’t know you were coming but still did. For you.
Just for you.
You laughed, danced a little, drank a little, cleaned together, watched a movie and now you’re in bed together.
Just as friends?
No. There was too much tension in the air today, way too much tension. Sure Jin has never really shown any outward romantic interest in you like say Jungkook and Taehyung have but then again not everyone is Jungkook and Taehyung and not everyone shows affection and like Jungkook and Taehyung do.
Maybe you’re overthinking this. No you’re definitely overthinking this. You shouldn’t even be thinking about this.
Not even a full week ago you—
Guilty.
You feel guilty now, real fucking guilty.
You breath quickens. Your mind spiralling.
Taehyung and you just— and what about Jaehyun? Would Yoongi be mad? Is Hobi really ok? You should call Jimin but have you been ignoring Kook? what about Joon?? Isn’t it Jaehyuns birthday today? And Jin—
“Hey”
His voice gentle
concerned.
It brings you out of your spiral almost instantly.
“I’m here, don’t cry i’m here”
You were crying? You hadn’t even noticed.
Jin now sits up on his side, one arm supports his weight the other gently wipes your tears away.
“Breathe with me baby, breathe you can do that f’me can’t you?”
You nod your head not trusting your voice in the moment. Tears cloud your vision. You breathe.
Nothing feels real.
“There you go, doing so well let’s slow down a little yeah? It’s just you and me i got you nothings gonna hurt you i promise”
You wordlessly nod once more and attempt to slow down your breathing.
A few “Good girl”’s and “I’m here”’s later your tears stop and your breathing is back to a somewhat normal pace.
You’re embarrassed.
“I’m sorr—”
“You don’t need to apologise”
Your hands cover your face.
“What’s on your mind?”
It’s such a simple question but it almost brings you to tears once more.
What’s on your mind?
What isn’t?
Who isn’t?
You feel disgusting. Like a whore.
It’s ironic really. You’ve been called a whore for practically your whole career by fans, friends the media sometimes as a joke other times not. But you’ve never really felt like a whore sure you’ve done your fair share of sleeping around couple dates here and there but you’ve never felt as gross as you do now.
What’s on your mind?
You think back to Jin’s question.
“You” Its partly true.
“Me?”
“Yeah”
There a beat of silence.
You’re the one to break it.
“Do you think…
i’m a bad person?”
“I could never think you’re a bad person”
He pauses.
“We could never think you’re a bad person”
“We?”
“The remaining 6 of us i don’t need to name them do i?”
He smiles at you.
You frown, you’re not convinced.
“You don’t know that though”
“I know”
“Even if—”
“Even if. Especially if.”
“What?” You’re caught off guard by his answer.
“You don’t even know what i was gonna say”
“I have my theories”
“Which are?”
“How about we got theory for theory?”
“You’re the one with the theories i’m the one with the facts”
“I guess you’re right”
“I normally am”
“Normally?”
“Yeah…don’t really know if i’ve been doing things right lately”
“Why?”
You sigh.
What do you have to lose?
You look him in the eyes.
now or never
“I-i slept with Taehyung”
“And that wasn’t right?”
“Well it was. It-it felt right it was right but i didn’t just sleep with him it was more than that and-and now i’m here with you...”
“Being with me isn’t right?”
“No! i’m not saying that i’m just saying being with you right feels right too and that isn’t right”
Jin doesn’t speak.
“Like i’m feeling things for too many people and that isn’t right”
You’re met with silence again. You feel defeated. You feel stupid. You feel exposed.
“Says who?”
You look at Jin puzzled.
“Well technically no one? but thinking about everyone’s feelings tells me it’s not right”
“Now that’s not right, personally i see no wrong in you feeling right with Tae and me”
“Really?”
“Really”
“You know when i say right i mean feelings? like i mean romantic feelings“
“I know”
He caresses your face.
“I’ve known”
His last sentence hits you hard for some reason. He’s known? He’s known that you were talking about romantic feelings? Or he’s known it’s not just him and Taehyung? Maybe he had known that you never really liked Jaehyun as much as you should have? Perhaps he had known you feel guilty? Known you can barely look yourself in the mirror anymore? Or is it that he had known you almost found yourself at Jimin’s apartment today?
“You don’t owe anyone anything you know that right?”
Your eyes sting. He continues.
“You shouldn’t feel like you have to choose. I would never make you choose. I know you need the other members as much as they need you as much as i need you. If being with them feels right as much as it feels right being with me who am i to deny you?”
There’s so much you could say right now. So many things you want to say, to ask. You open your mouth to speak but the words don’t seem to find you.
You bite your lip, tears spot your vision once more. You’ve cried an awful lot today first tears of guilt and now tears of sadness? Or perhaps it’s relief? You’re unsure.
Just like you’re unsure on whether this moment is real or not. Unsure if you’re even here. Unsure if this is right.
You can barely make out Jin’s figure between your watery vision and the darkness of the room. His hand now strokes your hair.
“Thank you” The only words you’re able to say. You don’t even know what you’re thanking him for or if you’re even thanking him.
“Thank you” You repeat. The only words that feel right to say in this moment.
He kisses your forehead “Let’s get some sleep yeah?”
1.3k words of pure shit my fault guys 😅🤗
if it wasn’t clear this was valentine’s day here for context
tags: @piw6n @92jinnies @birdie-vhs @kooksmilitarywife @hob3loveofmylife @jujubiism @bloopkook @ratchetpizza1 @myntalks @arloo00 @watamotee33 @y2kcy3brz @taiwan0618 @freyadanvers @gguksbeloved @raetf @bbsantc @winuvs @medicinemybish @bxnnyhime @leleluvsbts @baetukki @zyaaaszn @thelilbutifulthings @jazminethecreator @k4ngelz @jmnscutie @threeopossumsinacoat @cynicalyoongs @lightningpussy54 @eunthv @gigiiiiislife @lowkeykin @elissasimp @socksfirstalways @knjlvr06 @lailaisarmy @thvkives @xstfudaisyx @xxxanimangxxx @solstice34 @ml8dy @hoeforseoks
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hyungieyoongi · 1 year
Text
Things They Do After You Get Engaged – Hyung Line
Pairing: Hyung Line x Reader (not poly)
Genre: Fluff (like extremely fluffy fluff) 
Word Count: 1.0K
A/N: hyung line forever 
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Jin 
“Jin, not again,” you whispered in panic to your fiancé, looking around at the many pairs of eyes staring at you in the park. You gave a soft smile to an elderly woman who was holding a hand to her heart, watching the two of you with fond eyes.
“Y/N, you are the love of my life. I am so lucky to call you mine. Will you be my wife? Marry me?” Jin asked, holding onto your left hand. He raised it to his lips, giving you a wink as he placed a gentle kiss to the back of it. Your cheeks flushed pink at his actions, shaking your head at your ridiculous life partner with affection.
“Yes, of course I will,” you said, letting out a sigh as the bystanders surrounding the two of you broke out into light applause. Jin smiled at you, standing up as he took you in his arms.
“Sweetheart, you can’t propose every time we are out in public,” you murmured into his chest, recovering from the slight embarrassment you felt as a result of Jin’s public display of affection.  
“But then how will people know how much I love you?” Jin asked seriously, pulling back to look at you. You held up your left hand, the diamond glinting in the sunshine.
“I think that was the whole point of this,” you said. “Remember how you gave it to me the first time you proposed?”
“Ah yes, well, I just like reliving my favorite moment,” Jin said, taking your hand in his and entwining your fingers so you could carry on with your walk.
“Is this going to stop any time soon?” you asked.
“Hmm, I’m not sure, want me to ask again?”  
“You’re insufferable,” you groaned.
“Good thing you love me anyway,” Jin said, wrapping his arm snuggly around you.
“Aren’t you lucky,” you teased.
“Yes, yes, I am.”
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Yoongi
“What are you doing?” Yoongi asked, glancing over at you with a confused expression behind his glasses.
You were frantically searching for your engagement ring underneath the kitchen table, hoping the sixth place you looked would finally be successful. You placed the ring in the same place every night before bed; this morning, it wasn’t there.
“Yoongi, get over here and come help me,” you said, frantically sweeping the wood floor with your eyes trying to spot a glimpse of the silver band.
“Babe, slow down, what’s wrong?” Yoongi asked, standing in front of you, hands on your shoulders to force you to stop your manic search efforts.
“I can’t find it,” you wailed, starting to break down from frustration. “My engagement ring—it’s gone!”
Much to your surprise, Yoongi chuckled.
“What could possibly be funny at a time like this?” you nearly shouted, stepping away from him in shock. Yoongi stopped laughing at your response, but a smirk still played at his lips.
“Y/N, I took it to the jeweler to get cleaned today. I’ll pick it up tomorrow morning on my way to the studio,” Yoongi shrugged nonchalantly. Your jaw dropped open slightly in shock, relief flooding your system as you realized it was in safe hands.
“Yoongi, I swear to God, if you ever do that again without telling me,” you threatened, stepping toward him with finger extended menacingly toward him. Yoongi held his hands up, acting innocent.
“Hey, I was just trying to be nice! I know it makes you happy when your ring sparkles.”
“If you weren’t so sweet, I’d throttle you right now,” you grumbled. Yoongi looked at you with pride.
“And that, ladies and gentlemen, is my future wife.”  
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Hoseok
This morning, it was a bright pink sticky note.
Good morning, sunshine, have a great day at work!
Yesterday, it was green.
Hello, my love, miss you already! See you at dinner!
Since the two of you got engaged, you had gotten used to occasionally seeing a neon sticky note on your dresser in the morning as you got ready for the day. Your engagement ring was always sitting next to the note, lid of the black, velvet box open to show off the beautiful diamond.
The first time it happened, you asked Hoseok about it while the two of you cuddled on the couch later that evening.  
“I just want to make you smile every morning, even on the days I have to leave earlier than you for work, and I don’t get to see you,” Hoseok explained, lips pressing a kiss to the top of your head as he continued to watch the show the two of you had started. Only your fiancé could manage to say one of the most romantic things you had ever heard sound so nonchalant.
You placed the ring on your finger, admiring it for a moment. You added the sticky note to your collection of them at the bottom drawer of your jewelry box before taking out your phone to text Hobi.
Thank you for making me smile, I love you.  
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Namjoon
You lifted the covers gently, trying not to wake your fiancé sleeping soundly next to you. You scooted under the duvet, a content sigh leaving your lips as your head finally hit the pillow. You were up late working on a project for work, Namjoon long having gone to bed before you finished for the night. 
You reached over his sleeping form to turn off his bedside lamp that he had left on. As you reached the switch, you felt Namjoon shift slightly, making you freeze. 
“Love? You finally coming to bed?” Namjoon asked, his voice muffled and rough from sleep. 
“Yes, go back to sleep,” you whispered, successfully turning the switch, engulfing the room in darkness. 
Namjoon turned around to face you after you laid back down, eyes still closed. He reached for your left hand, bringing it up to his lips to place a kiss on the empty ring finger where your engagement ring sits throughout the day—it was a habit that Namjoon had started after the two of you became engaged a few months ago. When you took your ring off at the end of the day and the two of you went to bed, Namjoon would take your hand in his, kissing the ring finger that symbolized your future together. It never failed to make your heart flutter. 
“Goodnight, Joonie,” you whispered. 
“Goodnight, my love.”
---
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seokjinsonlyone · 4 months
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most to least likely to want you to make the first move
tae: the thing about taehyung is that he's a coquettte like he 100% loves to be pursued like i swear this happened irl but it always feels like i'm making it up bc i can never find the post but i think in 2020 there was a time period of like a month or two and we missed him soooo bad and then one day he randomly popped up and was like yeah i be browsing through here but i ain't say nothing bc i liked seeing y'all say y'all miss me like 😐 so yeah he loves the thrill of it all he loves the thought of having you wrapped around his finger me thinks gonna tata mic in yo face until you have no choice but to conquer him
jk: we have him on record saying "if you want me, come get me" so there's that but also okay i know jk ain't super shy no more but at the same time social settings still aren't his forte like he still has trouble figuring out when to jump into conversations and you can definitely tell when he ain't got a single thought running through his brain so i feel like you initiating will take the pressure off also this man is literally a perfectionist and a procrastinator like i feel like he been done took so long to ask u out u not even interested no more gotta strike when the iron hot with this one skskkslks
joon: he loves people he loves making connections and he loves reciprocal energy so if he's feeling you and you reach out first i think he'd love that fr like someone bold not tiptoeing around him not afraid to express what they're feeling it's gon do it for him every time
suga: i bet yoon really doesn't mind either way like he's not afraid to go and get what he wants and he appreciates people with a similar mind set
jin: i don't think he's opposed to it it's just that he needs to have you figured out before there's any forward movement and then after he figures you out he needs to figure out how he feels about it and you if it's even worth progressing forward so if you were to interrupt that process by moving before he's ready it would confuse him and he'd be very hesitant bc he doesn't wanna just outright reject you but he doesn't wanna just go for it either LOL he just needs a lil time; if he already knew how he felt about you however you making the first move would be awesome it'd save him some time and energy
hobi: he wouldn't be mad at it right but i feel like he's more traditional with it like ugh i love him so much he's such a gentleman so i feel like he'd wanna do the whole asking out pick you up for your first date at your doorstep bouquet of flowers in tow like he doesn't mind you being bold so if u wanna be an obvious flirt or whatever do yo thang but i do think he wants to take the lead
jimin: don't get me wrong i know jimin likes to be liked he likes to know that you know he knows you like him 100% but i get the feeling he likes the allure of the chase even more like you coming on to him may intrigue him for a good time but if you really want him i get the feeling that you gotta play the long game like very much give and take tease play his game until he has no choice but to give into it
a/n: luh calm post sumn breezy sumn light sksskls crazy thing about this is i've had this idea and ranking in my drafts for like a year and then this morning i scrolled past and was like huh that makes sense and then my brain kicked into gear and told me why LOL sorry i'm slow as molasses but take this snack as apology and i maybe 👀 hopefully 🙏 may have something a little more substantial before the year ends <3
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dollfaceksj · 6 months
Text
met him last night | ksj (m) pt. 2
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➥ PAIRING: seokjin x fem!reader
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➥ SUMMARY: You’ve worked in the office with Kim Seokjin for quite some time but you never really pay attention to him. He’s basically your stereotypical introverted nerd with complimentary glasses decorating his eyes and sweater vests clinging to his torso. Coincidentally, you bump into him outside of work. You’re in for the shock of your life when you find some stuff out about him.
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➥ GENRE: smut ⋆ plot twist ⋆ porn with plot
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➥ CATEGORY: two-shot
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➥ WARNINGS: explicit sexual content, bigdick!seokjin is real, protected sex, couch sex, praise kink, oral sex (rec m & f), face fucking, fingerfucking, cumshot on tits, cumshot on ass, little plottwist, doggy style, pinning arms back, cocky!seokjin, denied orgasm, missionary, minors DNI
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➥ WORDCOUNT: 6.5k
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a/n: ughhh i can’t believe its finally done! part 2 (and final part) to mhln !!! not betaread or anything so ignore any mistakes plsss hope u like it <3333 tell me ur thoughts <3
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⋆ TAGLIST ⋆
⇠ PREV. ⋆ MASTERLIST ⋆ NEXT ⇢
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You quickly straighten your back up, trying to hide your nerves with your eyes still glued to him, intently watching as he makes his way over to you. You lean back into your sofa, glancing up at him as he places his knee next to your thigh and his hand next to your head against the backrest of your sofa.
His other hand moves forward to tilt your chin up, his thumb gently caressing your jaw. “It’s a shame, truly,” he mumbles as he uses his thumb to start wiping off whatever is left of your lipgloss, bringing his gloss-covered thumb to his lips to lick it clean.
Your brows pinch together at his words. You swallow, an attempt at drowning out your nerves before asking, “What is?”
Silence settles around you for a few seconds before he decides to speak again.
“That I’ll ruin your pretty makeup.”
Those are the last words that leave his mouth before he hunches over you and presses his plump lips to yours. The finger that was previously on your chin travels down your jaw to your neck, gently wrapping his hand around your throat to pull your face closer to his.
You’re just about to return the kiss when he abruptly pulls back, face still a centimeter away from yours as he glances down at your lips. “You’re gorgeous,” he mumbles before plopping down on the couch next to you and tugs you to him by your waist, motioning for you to sit on his lap.
It’s almost embarrassing how quickly you hike your skirt up to lunge at him, throwing your thigh over his and climbing onto his lap. He sinks further into your couch and shifts his gaze up to your face, plump bottom lip trapped between his teeth as his hands tightly grip onto your hips.
He lets your hands roam his chest, letting you feel every dip and muscle as you look down at him through hooded eyelids, hands moving up to cup his face. Your face closes in on his, your lips softly pressing against his pillowy ones in a heated kiss.
His hands tighten their grip on your hips, fingers sinking into the fabric of your skirt which makes you yelp against his mouth. It gives him the chance to lick into your mouth and he does.
He tastes like tomato sauce and basil.
You wrap your arms around his neck in an attempt to pull him even closer, your breasts pressed flat into his chest.
His hands slide down the sides of your thighs, giving them a soft squeeze. His tongue dances around yours, head tilting to the side to close whatever distance was still in between you two.
Your hips involuntarily jolt and grind into his groin, a soft moan sliding up the back of your throat at the friction. A low grunt rumbles in his chest, his own hips bucking up into your core, returning the favor.
His erection hardens under your sex and your mouth salivates at the thought of his massive dick, you want to taste him. You want to taste him real bad.
You pull away from his lips with a deep inhale and say, “Fuck, I want to suck you off.”
His eyes shift up to stare into yours, an unreadable expression on his features. You can’t help but glance down at his swollen lips as you await his response, trying to ignore the uncomfortable feeling of your panties sticking to your sex.
“Not beating around the bush anymore, hm?” A cocky grin tugs at the corners of his lips as he sinks even further into your couch, adjusting his hips in his seat to help you slide off his lap.
You get onto your knees in front of him, the cold tiles sending a shiver up your spine. You slowly travel your hands up his leg, softly squeezing his soft skin when your hands arrive at his thighs.
“Pull me out.”
The words leave his mouth filled with so much arrogance that you can’t help but reach for his belt straight away, unbuckling it with a quickness. Your eyes travel up his figure, glancing up at him through your pretty lashes but he’s already staring back at you, hand reaching up and resting on top of your head.
He lifts his hips off the couch to help you slide his pants down and he instantly palms himself through his boxers, his other hand moving down your face to tilt your chin up. “You’re so pretty.”
Your teeth sink into your bottom lip at his compliment, creating a tightness in your stomach and a squeeze in your core, pussy clenching around absolutely nothing.
You tuck your fingers under the hem of his boxers and slowly tug them down, watching in anticipation as his dick springs free from under the hem.
What the fuck?
Your eyes widen as you stare at his erection, it’s still hardening and it’s already bigger than any dick you’ve ever seen before. Big veins trail down his dark shaft, the head of his dick begging for attention.
A chuckle makes his chest rumble when he sees your reaction. His hand wraps around the base of his shaft, causing him to hiss at the touch, a soft grunt pushing past his lips. Your eyes shift to the precum leaking from his tip and you almost drool all over his slacks.
“How the fuck is that supposed to fit literally anywhere?” you grumble, eyes glancing up at him for the first time since seeing his dick and he’s just got a smug smirk sitting on his gorgeous lips.
“You can take it,” he quips, “can’t you?”
Oh.
Well, now you want to do just that.
He places his other hand on your cranium as he moves the tip of his dick across your lips, smearing them full of his precum. You continue to stare at him, never once breaking eye contact, giving him the best doe-eyes you can muster.
“Just tap me twice if it becomes too much,” he adds, a sincere look in his eyes. You nod to his words, placing your hands on his thighs as you mentally prepare yourself to have destroyed vocal cords tomorrow morning.
“Now, stop looking at me with those innocent eyes and open up that pretty mouth like a good girl.”
You don’t hesitate for a second after hearing his words, parting your lips to take him into your mouth almost immediately after. You lower your head, wrapping your lips around the head and you gently start sucking on it. The hiss leaving his mouth tells you that he enjoys that, making you push your tongue flat against his slit and swirl it around to collect his salty precum on your tastebuds.
His hand tenses on top of your head and his hips unexpectedly buck up, making you gag. You keep his dick in your mouth but glare up at him, just in time to see him give you a sheepish, apologetic smile. You grunt as you lower your head again, your saliva rolling down his shaft as you try to take as much as you can of him into your mouth.
“Holy shit,” whispers Seokjin, hand delicately stroking your hair.
You grab onto the base of his dick with both hands and let your saliva roll down your fingers to lube them up enough to pump the part you can’t reach. You begin to take more of him into your mouth but you haven’t even made it halfway down before the head of his dick hits the back of your throat, tears threatening to spill from your eyes.
“Fuck, you look so pretty like this,” he moans, his head rolling back onto the backrest of your coach, his chest dramatically rising and falling as he chases his breath.
You hum in response, watching how his hips are tensing and twitching, trying not to thrust up into your mouth. You slowly pull him out, a string of your saliva still connecting to his dick as you continue to jack him off. “I’ll let you fuck my mouth but if I tap twice, you have to stop, okay?”
His eyes shoot open at the offer and he whispers a low swear word before he nods and gets up onto his feet. He slings his suit jacket off, throwing it somewhere on your couch as you get onto your feet, hiking your skirt up so you can bend at the knees and squat in front of him since your knees were already starting to hurt.
He moves to stand in between your spread thighs, hands making their way back to your head as he slowly guides his dick back into your mouth. You move your hands up his bare legs, digging your nails into his warm skin as he starts thrusting into your warm, wet mouth.
You try to blink back your tears but it doesn’t help, every small thrust hits the back of your throat and you’re seconds away from suffocating. The tears start spilling out of your eyes but you refuse to stop him, the way he’s thrusting into your mouth with his head thrown back and soft moans leaving his lips is making you want to keep going, be the reason for his pleasure.
“Fuck, can I cum on your tits?” he asks in between moans, his thrusts getting even rougher. You finally tap his thigh twice and he immediately slides out of your mouth, reaching for your chin to make you tilt your head up at him. He scans your face with a concern frown but you simply slap his hand away.
Your hand reaches up as you start unbuttoning your silk shirt, successfully taking it off, tossing it aside and unclasping your bra all in a few seconds.
He doesn’t have to fucking ask twice.
He grunts, fingers coming back to hold your chin in place to look at him. Your makeup has undoubtedly smudged all over your face but you don’t care, not when Seokjin is looking at you as if you’re the most beautiful being he has ever laid his eyes upon.
He continues to pump himself with his other habd, chasing his own release. You slowly move back toward the couch, sprawling yourself out on the edge of the couch’s cushions and pulling Seokjin forwards to stand in between your spread thighs. You lean your upper back against the couch, allowing gravity to work for you as you reach up to his dick and take it from him, aiming the tip at your chest.
Your eyes travel up to meet his gaze as you start pumping him, watching as he stares you down with such overwhelming lust that it’s got your useless panties no longer acting as a barrier because you’re pretty sure you’ve started leaking through the fabric.
“Fuck,” he pauses after a deep inhale, “you’re so fucking pretty.”
An involuntary moan escapes your lips at the praise but your hands keep going, wanting nothing more than for him to cum all over your breasts.
“You’re pretty too,” you say with a sheepish smile, still looking up at him with your pretty eyes.
“I know,” he moans and the sight makes you giggle. At least he’s funny.
His dick twitches in your hand and before you know it, white ropes of his warm cum start coating your chest and nipples. He moans several swear words as he cums all over your breasts, his eyes taking in the sight and committing it to memory.
You’re upper body is sprawled on the couch cushions, tits covered in saliva and cum, makeup running down your face, hair fucked up.
You blink up at him with hooded eyes as your hands finally come to a stop, still gripping the base of his shaft.
“Fuck, don’t look at me like that,” he grunts, still chasing his breath as he wipes the sweat off his forehead with the back of his hand.
The Devil starts tugging on the corner of your lips, making you smirk. “Like what?”
“Like you want me to destroy you.”
You’re once again slapped in the face by his blunt words but you can’t help but want him to go through with that statement.
“But I do,” you reply, bringing up the back of your hand to wipe your chin clean of the saliva, or at least some of it.
“Yeah, I bet,” he mumbles as he starts unbuttoning his shirt and runs his hand through his hair, messing it up in the process.
He hunches over and pulls you up onto your feet, tugging your skirt down your hips without any obstacles and tossing it aside aggressively. He takes a seat on the couch and spreads his legs wide apart before tugging you toward him to sit in between his legs.
You move to tug off your panties but he stops you, just patting the spot in between his thighs, motioning for you to turn around. You blink at him for a moment before you place your ass right in between his thighs and lean your back into his chest like he wants you to.
His hand trails down your waist to your thigh, awakening the thousands of goosebumps underneath the upperlayer of your skin. He taps your skin gently, mumbling something about spreading for him and you comply.
He uses his other hand to hold your leg apart from the other by placing his hand under the back of your knee and pulling it up while his other hand slowly starts rubbing circles onto your clothed pussy.
You sigh at the friction, finally getting some attention and a soft moan escapes your lips.
“Fuck, you got that wet from sucking me off?” His voice rings in your ear and his proximity almost makes you dizzy, it’s the only explanation for the room that seems to be spinning around you. His words too, because they’re true. The kissing turned you on but letting him use your mouth left you dripping with arousal.
You hum in response as your hips start to roll into his hand, your eyes trailing down to your chest that’s still covered in his cum.
“Leave it like that, you look so pretty.” He must’ve noticed the way you were eyeing his load on your chest but you quickly nod, assuring him you were in no hurry to get rid of it.
He slowly peels your panties off your pussy, noticing the way they stick to your folds. He hums in delight as he pushes your underwear to the side. Your gaze shifts downwards and you intently watch as he effortlessly slides his fingers in between your folds, his fingers already soaked with your slick.
He pulls his fingers back, wanting a glimpse of his fingers covered in your slick. “Fuck,” whispers Seokjin.
You lean your head back into the crook of his neck as you moan softly, chest rising and falling dramatically. His lips leave soft kisses on the side of your neck as his fingers rub your clit, down to your slit, down to your hole to gently tease it.
You’re going to need all the preparation you can get because his dick will undoubtedly make you feel like you’re having sex for the first time all over again.
You impatiently rut your hips into his fingers but he just chuckles, gathering your slick onto his fingers and smearing it all over your sex.
“You’re so impatient, pretty.” His beautiful voice feels like it’s being ladled into your ear by a cloud yet his tone is coated in mockery.
You merely grunt in response before actually using your words. You grumble, “Put them in.”
A hoarse laugh pushes past his lips before he slides his middle and ring finger into your pussy, curling them right away. He watches you with a twisted smirk on his lips as you start writhing on him, bucking your hips the moment his fingertips graze your g-spot.
He shushes you quietly as he begins to fuck his fingers into you, slamming his palm against your clit and doing so at an angle that causes the disgusting gushing sound of your wet pussy to ring in your ears.
You shake your head, you plead, you cry, you do anything to let him know you want to cum, right now, right here on his fingers.
“Listen to that,” he mumbles, lips grazing the shell of your ear as he continues to curl his fingers every now and then. He watches you from the corner of his eyes, thoroughly enjoying how he’s got you writhing for him. “I need a taste.”
That’s all he says before hoisting you off of him and tossing you beside him, onto your couch. A gasp leaves your throat at the sudden strength he uses to do that and the way he drags you to the edge of the cushions, legs spread for him.
He settles on his knees in between your thighs, licking his lips at the sight of your glistening pussy in front of him. “Would you look at that?” he whispers, using his fingers to spread your folds for him.
Fortunately, he wastes no time and lowers his mouth onto your sex, tongue pressed flat against it as he licks up all of your arousal – that he’s the sole cause of.
A pathetic whimper slides up the back of your throat, legs jerking and body squirming under him but he simply chuckles. “I haven’t even done anything, look at you squirming.”
But then, his smile is nowhere to be seen and he’s got a black expression on his beautiful face. “Stay still,” he demands, his voice low and his eyes fixed on your pussy.
Your hips are restrained by his hands, holding you down against the couch as his tongue goes on a rampage against your poor clit. You cry and mewl under him, thighs shaking and fingers gripping at the pillows decorating your couch.
“Fuck,” you moan once he shoves his tongue into you, nose bumping against your clit and teasing you further while he fucks his wet muscle into you.
All you can do is moan and cry his name, fingers tugging at his perfectly styled hair but he doesn’t seem to mind.
“This pussy,” he mumbles as he shakes his head. “Might never get enough of it.” He dives right back in, mouth completely and aggressively devouring you as if he didn’t just have a meal.
“Fuck, I’m gonna fucking cum,” you sniff, hips jerking and thighs clenching but he continues to hold you down, not allowing you to escape his grasp. Your warning words only seem to encourage him as he completely sucks you for what you’re worth.
His precision and movements never falter, continuously stimulating your clit. “You’re already making me hard again,” he says matter-of-factly once he pulls back from your pussy. You think he’s edging you but that thought gets thrown out the window when he suddenly hooks his hands around the back of your thighs and shoves your legs toward you, pressed against your torso to spread you out even more for him.
If this pose isn’t embarrassing enough, him staring down at your pussy like this would certainly be enough to make you anxious.
“What?” you ask quietly as you glance down at him, your chest still in- and deflating from all that pleasure you received just now.
He glances up into your eyes for a few seconds with an unreadable look in his eyes before shifting his eyes back down to your sex, so spread and so exposed for him. “Just admiring your pussy. Can’t I?”
Your teeth roughly bite down on your bottom lip, eyes still watching his every move in anticipation.
But then he simply chuckles to himself before closing in on your pussy again and licking, sucking, making out with your nether regions as if he hasn’t eaten in days. Holy shit, he’s fucking good.
Ugh, why would anyone want to ditch him?
You almost flinch when he exhales slightly, something you’d describe as a quick chuckle. His breath drapes all over your pussy, making you glance down at him but he’s already staring at you.
“Why, thank you.” He rises to his feet as he wipes his mouth with the back of his hand and ditches the rest of his clothes. “But I was never stood up.”
Your brows pinch together. What is he talking about?
Hold on.
Did you actually say that outloud? Fuck. You goofy bitch!
“What do you mean, you were never stood up?” you mumble as you watch him rip a condom package with his teeth and slowly roll the condom onto his massive dick, giving it a few test tugs.
“Yeah, I lied,” he says nonchalantly as he pulls your leg up and slings it over his shoulder, pulling you to the edge of the couch whilst he stays kneeling on the floor in front of you.
“You lied? How did you lie? I saw you there, sitting by yourself…”
“Yeah, about that...” He slowly starts to push in, making sure to watch your face for any sign of regret or un-readiness.
But you simply squeeze your eyes shut at the burn, he’s inhumanely big and you’re already seeing celestial bodies on the back of your eyelids from how tightly you’re squeezing your eyes shut but he’s being very careful, clearly experienced in this regard.
Did he decide to spring that bullshit on you whilst pushing into you so you’d forget about it?
Well, it’s working. What the fuck?
You can’t help it, your teeth are digging into your bottom lip and your eyes are finally open once he bottoms out. Your walls are burning from the stretch, clearly not very welcoming in these few moments. A few of his hair strands are sticking to his forehead from the sweat but he never loses concentration of going slow and steady.
“You okay?” he whispers, gently rubbing your clit in hopes of helping you relax.
“Ye… Yeah, I think,” you whisper in response, mind clouded. You can’t think about anything else right now.
He slowly nods his head. “You’re going to squeeze my fucking dick off, doll. Relax for me,” he whispers as he reaches over to smooth out the scrunch in your brows with his thumb.
Damn, he’s so damn sexy. You really don’t know him at all.
“Well, clearly I’ve never had something that big shoved in there,” you snark, struggling a little as you do your best to just relax but of course, it’s easier said than done.
“I’ve never fucked anything this tight either,” he chuckles as he leans a bit closer into you, still fully shoved into you, yet not moving. “Let me kiss you.”
You stare into his big brown eyes, your own eyes dropping down to his lips before trailing back up to his eyes.
“Just breathe. You can take it, princess. Look at you, you look so pretty under me.” He leans further down until he’s pressed his lips against yours and if this is him trying to get your mind off of getting split in half by his dick, it’s working.
Because kissing Seokjin is otherworldly. His lips are so plump and pillowy, you could kiss him for fucking hours. You wonder what his lips would look like after making out for hours, swollen and red. Fuck.
He kisses you gently, one thumb still rubbing your clit and you’re trying so hard not to clench around his dick because you’re scared you might actually squeeze his dick off.
“Move,” you demand after a few moments of kissing, wrapping your legs around his waist and caging him in by locking your feet with each other behind his back.
He slowly, very slowly, starts to pull out of you, leaving the head of his dick inside before pushing back into you.
You mewl at the intrusion, throat dry with the sounds you’ve been letting out.
“Shhh, you’re doing so well. Taking it like a champ,” he whispers against your lips, steadily thrusting into you.
Ugh, what happened in your life for the nerdy intern to be talking you through sex right now?
“Faster,” you mumble once he pulls away from your lips, leaning his forehead against yours.
“I hear you,” he chuckles as he picks up the pace of his thrusting, hips rolling into yours at a delicious pace.
“Fuck,” you moan, actually enjoying the burning fullness he gives you. “Fuck, you– you said something about… about lying to me?”
He glances into your eyes, a pinch in his brows as he tries to keep himself from just moaning in response. “Yeah, I lied to you, princess. Sorry about that.”
A cry rips through your poor throat when he suddenly starts snapping his hips into yours, pounding you at a pace and with a type of strength that has your eyes rolling into the back of your head.
Is he doing that to stop you from interrogating him?
“Shit, you’re making a mess on your floor, beautiful.” He says it with such cockiness in his tone that it makes you want to smack him right across the face but he’s just so fucking fine that you have no choice but to let it slide.
You watch as he reaches over to grab some of the paper towels that you placed on the coffee table earlier and uses them to wipe down his cum from your chest to avoid making a mess on your couch.
At least he’s considerate, you suppose.
You drop your head further back against the cushions, moans continuously spilling from your lips as his hips pound into yours, his dick rubbing every single millimeter of your slick walls.
Tears spill out of your eyes from all the sensations ripping through your body, your own hand coming up to shield the outside world from your loudness but Seokjin is quicker, slapping your hand away from your mouth.
“Let me hear how pretty I make you sound.” He simply continues to fuck into you, making sure your leg stays secured against his torso and over his shoulder.
He deliberately fucks you at an angle that makes the squelching of your pussy that much louder and embarrassing. “Listen to that,” he whispers, mockery on his face and a curl at the corners of his lips.
“Shut up,” you whimper, cheeks heated in embarrassment. “Don’t think I–” you yelp, “I forgot about you telling me you lied to me.”
He merely hums in response and leans back a bit, grabbing both your legs by the back of your knees and pushing them toward your chest while he continues to snap his hips into yours, stretching you out so harsh yet so fucking good.
“If you ask the right questions, I promise I’ll answer honestly.” His ragged breathing betrays his act of nonchalance but you’re too fucked out to point it out.
Ugh. Is this a game to him?
You inhale a shaky breath. “Did you get stood up or not?” you ask, hoping he’ll give you the clarification you’re looking for despite already having told you that he lied to you about it.
“No,” he replies, teeth digging into his plump bottom lip as you clench and squeeze around him.
You manage to ask through moans, “So, she did show up?”
He shakes his head, eyes glued to the way his dick slides in and out of you. He abruptly pulls out and turns you over by your waist, pressing your face, stomach and chest deeply into the cushions of your couch and wastes no time slamming back into you.
“Fuck!” you cry out with your knees now on the floor, mouth practically drooling all over your couch as he tugs your arms towards him and bends them at the elbows to pin them into your lower back, keeping you caged and with no other option than to take it.
And you wouldn’t want it any other way.
“No,” he grunts in reply, hips continuously snapping into your ass and his eyes glued to your bum recoiling against his body.
What the hell? He’s not making any sense.
If she didn’t show up, that means he got stood up, doesn’t it?
Wait.
The realization sets.
“Did–” you pause, trying to catch your breath. “Did you have a date at all?”
He hums in response as he fucks you, one hand keeping your arms pinned and one hand coming down to squeeze the soft skin of your ass.
“I didn’t.”
Huh?
An involuntary sob escapes you, earning a cocky chuckle from him. Bastard. “So,” you start, “what were you doing there?”
He was just sitting there. He hadn’t even ordered yet. Why the hell was he there?
He kisses his teeth with a loud smack as he stays quiet for a few moments after your question. “I own the restaurant.”
Record scratch.
What?
You echo, “You own the restaurant?”
That restaurant is very fancy and pricey, why was he working in a company like yours if he owned a restaurant like that?
“Well, my dad does.” He lets go of your arms to grip both your hips, rocking you back onto his sex instead of fucking you. “I’ll be inheriting it soon.”
Fucking hell.
That explains the expensive car.
The next few moments are just filled with moans, heavy breathing and skin slapping. His fingers dig into your skin, gripping you tightly as if you’d slip through of his fingers.
Your own hand reaches down and starts rubbing at your clit, teeth abusing your bottom lip as you squeeze your eyes shut. “Fuck,” you whimper as your orgasm starts approaching.
“You gonna cum?” he whispers, slightly picking up the pace of his thrusts.
You quickly nod your head, face still buried in your coach and it’s going to be very fun to clean that makeup off your couch.
“Go on, then,” he encourages, his hand coming down to your ass in a rough slap, making you jolt forwards from the impact.
Swear words continue to fall from his lips and you struggle to even form a coherent sentence.
But then, the world stops spinning and the room starts to.
Your phone is ringing. Fuck!
You slowly reach over and turn your screen to face you, curses falling from your lips.
Seokjin asks, “Who is that?”
Fuck. “It’s Taehyung. He probably wants to know if I got home okay. I’ll just text him la–”
“Pick up,” he says, thrusts never halting. Actually, his hips pound into yours even harsher. Bastard.
You squeal, “I’m not going to pick up while I’m–”
He cuts you off. “While you’re getting fucked by me?”
“It has nothing to do with you. Just… you know. Me getting fucked.”
A sultry chuckle leaves his mouth and he gradually slows down in pace, sensually rolling his hips into yours. “Go on, pick up.”
An exasperated sigh leaves your mouth quietly as you accept the call and put the phone to your ear. “Hello?”
“Yo, where are you?”
“I’m uh,” you mumble as you shake your head, trying so hard to not focus on the way the tip of Seokjin’s dick softly kisses your cervix with each thrust. “I’m home.”
“Alright. Cool if I come over?”
Your eyes almost pop out of your eye sockets. “What? No. You can’t come over.”
“Huh? Why?”
“Because,” you pause as you glance over your shoulder into Seokjin’s eyes with an expression on your face that only feeds his damn ego. “Just because, okay?”
“But you– oh.” Taehyung goes quiet. “Oh. I see how it is,” he says and you can practically hear the shit-eating grin in his voice.
“Bye, Taehyung.”
“I bet you’re getting dicked down by big dick Seokj–”
Your thumb quickly slams down on the red hang up button before you toss your phone aside, ready to hear Seokjin’s comments and questions about the phone call but he doesn’t say anything.
Instead, he picks up the pace again, fucking you just the way he seems to like it.
He places his hands on your shoulders and continues to fuck the absolute shit out of you, making you arch your back and ruin your throat with the way he’s pounding your poor pussy.
The consistent thrusts and his silent whispers of praise are what ultimately send you over the edge, your entire body shuddering and falling limp against the couch as he continues to fuck you through your orgasm. You pathetically cry out under him, clenching around him, the entire room spinning as his big dick slides in and out of you.
“Shit, you’re so fucking hot,” he mumbles as he spreads your asscheeks apart, eyes glued to how he slides in and out of you and the way your tight pussy grips onto him. “Can I cum on you again?”
Fuck. He can cum wherever the fuck he wants.
“Yeah,” you whimper in overstimulation, not having enough energy or sass to roll your eyes at his cocky chuckle. Bastard.
“You’re so good to me,” he whispers, hips snapping into your ass as he chases his own high. It doesn’t take long until he completely pulls out of you and yanks the condom off, aiming his dick at your ass and unloading all over your bum, coating your skin in his cum.
“Fuck,” he groans, watching as you reach for your ass and spread your cheeks for him, looking over your shoulder at him.
He mumbles, “Shit, you’re gonna be the death of me.”
You merely hum in response, still in the clouds from that orgasm as he milks himself of every drop on your soft skin.
After he comes down from his high, he focuses on catching his breath but doesn’t wait for much longer until he reaches for the roll of paper towels again. He quietly cleans you up, slow and steady, making sure not to spill before he moves onto the mess you made on the floor.
He gently tugs your panties back up your legs and by the time he’s helped you sit back onto the couch, he’s already fully dressed.
He looks down at you, wiping some of your makeup with the paper towels but it’s not doing much. “I like how fucked your face is,” he comments, rubbing your chin with his thumb as he stands before you.
A scowl forms on your face but it just elicits a chuckle from him before he leans down and softly pecks your lips.
He reaches for your elbows and helps you rise to your feet, asking for directions to your room.
Once he’s helped you out of your clothes and thoroughly cleaned you up, he helps you into bed.
When the click of the door handle being turned reaches your ears, you stop him by calling out his name and it makes him glance at you over his. shoulder. “You can just stay. It’s really late.”
He stares at you for a moment before chuckling and adding a shake to his head for good measure. “One conversation and I’m spending the night? I wonder how long it’ll take for you to fall for me.”
You roll your eyes exaggeratedly and pettily turn onto your side, giving him your cold back. “Then don’t stay, I was just trying to be polite.”
His obnoxious laugh rips through your eardrums and it’s like he’s the only person on Earth with you now.
It isn’t long before you hear the ruffling of his clothes and the mattress behind you dipping under his weight.
You try to go to sleep with his soft breath grazing your neck but unfortunately, you can’t ignore it and it takes you a whole lot of time to actually doze off.
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The soft clinking of metal wakes you out of your slumber. You slowly awaken, your eyes meeting his figure in the corner of your room as he buckles his belt in front of the mirror.
You slowly sit up and rub the sleep out of your eyes. “Why did you lie to me?” you hoarsely ask him, this time not beating around the bush.
He glances at you through the mirror for a second, probably surprised that you’ve woken up. He then fully returns his attention to himself and shrugs his shoulders with a hint of nonchalance. “Why were you nice to me when no one else was?”
At this, you can’t help but frown. What kind of a question is that? “Because I’m a decent human being?”
He tilts his head to the side at your answer, eyes staring at you through the mirror in silence for several seconds.
“And I’m not.” He turns around to face you. “Does that answer your question, lovely?” he says it with so much nonchalance and arrogance, like he genuinely doesn’t care at all.
You idly blink at him through the mirror from where you’re seated, mind booming with all the images of nerdy Seokjin and it’s like you’re staring at a completely different person. Are you sure he doesn’t have an evil twin or something like that?
He slowly walks up to you and it makes you sit up even straighter and for some reason his proximity still makes you nervous. Your eyes slowly travel up his body, finally glancing at him through your pretty lashes.
“I put my number on that note over there. Call me whenever you need me.” He nods towards your nightstand and you follow his line of direction, noticing a pink post-it with his number, name and a winking smiley scribbled on it.
When you turn your head back to look at him, he raises his hand and strokes your head before leaning down to press a gentle peck to your pouty lips. “Or whenever you want me, I don’t judge.” He winks at you, rubbing your bottom lip with his thumb before straightening his back and gathering his wallet and keys.
Is this really how it’s going to go?
“Wait,” you call out. He cocks an eyebrow at you as he absentmindedly slides his wallet and keys into the pockets of his slacks.
You say, “Am I supposed to just… act like nothing happened?” With a slight shake to your head, you continue, “Tomorrow at work? Like you haven’t shown me your true colors?”
Is he going to act like nothing happened? Is he going to be the same Seokjin you’ve always known? Will he have a distinct look in your eye every time he looks at you? Couldn’t you just out him to the others? Why was he comfortable showing you such private matters about himself?
His dark eyes stare into yours for a moment longer and it almost stings, it stings the way he stares you down. The faintest smirk creeps onto his lips and you can swear you just met the Devil, standing face to face with evil reincarnated.
Then, he simply shrugs his shoulders and drops them again as he heads out the door, not even looking back at you.
“It’s not like anyone would believe you anyways.”
And with that, he exits your apartment, leaving you to process what happened in the past 12 hours on your own.
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401 notes · View notes
cryinginmyroomsposts · 8 months
Text
Growing into Love
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pairing:Husband!Seokjin x fem!reader
tags: fluff, slight angst, husband Jin, non-idol!au, Arranged marriage trope, mentions of parent issues
summary: Arranged marriage could've been a lot of things, but with Jin, it was nothing but comfortable. Maybe too comfortable that you hadn't realised when you'd both fallen in love.
masterlist | Let me know your thoughts and feedback.
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“You know what Mom, I’m sorry. I thought, for once, you’d understand me but of course. My bad. Let’s just forget this. Bye.”
No matter how long it had been, it was never easy. Even years of therapy cannot make the complicated relationship between your parents and you easier to deal with. After everything said and done, you still did love your parents and you knew they loved you too. Even if they weren't great at depicting it without it affecting you.
It was tiresome nevertheless. The constant back and forth, you still hoping they'd understand even though they haven't in the last twenty-seven years and them hoping you'd finally see their side.
It had gotten easier when you had moved out after high school. You had enjoyed the taste of freedom and independence for 6 years since high school, mainly because you knew it came with a deadline- arranged marriage. It was a tradition in your family, everybody always got an arranged marriage. Even after knowing that it’s your destiny, the fear of “what ifs” had eaten you up for years.
For years you'd fought against it, but eventually, you lost all the will to fight and gave in. You had no choice. No matter how much you did, they always demanded more. Maybe you were to blame, for hoping even after everything.
With all the thoughts and the pain still fresh in your heart, you slump against the sofa on the floor throwing your phone on the coffee table. You're trying your best to not let the tears fall. Leaning your head back you just breathe and try to stop the well-known spiral that was going on in your brain.
"That bad huh?"
The voice startles you. You open your eyes to see your husband standing at the kitchen entrance looking at you. His wide shoulders clad in his favourite white t-shirt, a pink worn-out apron on his slender waist, glasses perched on the bridge of his nose, the soft features on his face slowly turning into concern as he assessed you.
Being married to Seokjin had been a pleasant surprise. Both of you knew what you were getting into, had spoken openly about your needs and kept to your boundaries. You understood that love was not exactly an option in your situation, but there was never any animosity between the two of you.
After a year of marriage, you'd become friends and partners/ teammates of sorts and constantly enabled each other to succeed. You had a routine, shared chores, shared your hobbies with each other and existed in perfect harmony. There was never a need or yearning for more, as it felt comfortably natural at every point.
Everything you'd learnt about him made you want to remove all the unfair pain he'd been through and protect him from further pain. One month into your marriage you got to know that his family had caused him a broken heart and forced him into this predicament. Yet he was always polite and nice to you and his family, and your respect for him grew multifold. Then you began noticing how he was often silent and blue when he thought no one was paying him attention. His smile faded every time he turned away from people which made you feel like it was you who was getting hurt.
But along the way, in the last year, Jin had genuinely become more balanced. His over-hyper nature around people and the eerily silent persona at home had slowly eased into a balance that dances on the verge of both. He makes you laugh almost every day, has cried in front of you a couple times and always cooked the most delicious meals every weekend. Jin was also a complete crackhead, especially when his younger brother Jungkook visits- which is almost all the time. Jungkook had been a big part of your life since your marriage and you would not have it any other way. Especially since it made Jin smile from his heart (and annoyed him to know bounds that you spoiled Jungkook).
"Y/N, are you okay?"
You blink at the voice, Jin is now crouching in front of you, back leaning against the coffee table as he looks at you. His eyes filled with worry, lips puckered and hair tousled. You bite your lips to prevent the threatening tears from falling down.
"Didn't you hear ?" You ask with a quivering voice, referring to the phone call you had with your parents moments ago.
"No, I was caught up in making lunch." He settles one hand on your shoulder in a pat. "But from the look on your face, I assume it didn't go well. If you want to talk, you know I'm here."
You nod, blinking more furiously in a futile attempt. He smiles and wipes the tears away.
"It's ok to cry, we spoke about this."
"I know. That's what I'm doing." You say as more tears fall and a smile graces your face. "Aha, I know what will cheer you up." His eyes widen and a mischievous smile plays on his face as you look at him in confusion. "I'll call Jungkookie, you are always happy when he annoys me. I don't get it but it'll work for now." You look at him for a moment to gauge how serious he is and end up laughing when he picks up his phone to call the younger one.
"No no Jin don't call kookie. Poor thing, he really wanted to sleep in this weekend. Plus he really needs to start hanging out with people other than us." You say between laughing as Jin puts his phone down.
"Hmmm," he thinks as he absentmindedly wipes more of your tears away and you're watching in anticipation waiting for his next suggestion. "In that case, maybe ice cream will help?" He asks with big eyes and a pout, looking like an innocent child. You immediately nod like an excited 5-year-old at his suggestion.
Jin brings you the ice cream tub you'd both bought at the supermarket and hands over a spoon.
"Here, enjoy!" "Hehe thanks, I love you. You're the best Jin." "Aissh, love you too. I'll go check on lunch. don't eat too much."
You were about to hum back in response but froze mid-action, ice cream spoon on the tip of your tongue. Your eyes widen in reaction and you drop the spoon on the floor. This causes Jin to stop midway to the kitchen and look at you.
"Y/N, are you okay?" He says rushing to your side. You just look at him in pure shock.
"We, I- we-" The words fail to come out of your mouth and your mind is a mess. "We what?" He asks, the concern back on his face.
"wesaidiloveyou" The words leave your mouth in such a hurry that Seokjin almost misses it. When he realises he gets more confused and replies with a shrug, "Yeah so?"
"What do you mean so? We said THE words Seokjin." The incredulous look on his face stays put and you add, "For the first time."
He scoffs and smiles. "This is not the first time."
"What?"
His smile falters, "You don't remember?" "Remember what? Jin don't mess with me now." Your voice is timid and you feel a giant lump creeping up your throat.
"You're the one messing with my head right now. Do you really not remember saying I love you to me that night?" He looks at you in disbelief, ears reddening and his pout in full display. "What night?"
"Y/N, come on seriously?" "I really don't remember Seokjin."
He stares at you for a moment too long, sighs and walks back to the kitchen. You close the ice cream tub and run to follow him in. He's stirring the stew in the pot and even though his back is facing you, you don't miss the agitation in his movements. You wait for him to close the lid on the pot and watch as he just stares at the wall. Slowly you move closer to him but he whips around even before you could tap on his shoulder, and looks at you.
"Jin, I really do not remember what you are referring to and I'm sorry. Just tell me when it was, please." You give him your best puppy eyes and he sighs leaning his head back on the shelf above, before facing you again.
"The night after we went to your cousin's wedding, in bed, before sleeping you told me you love me and I said it back." Your jaw drops to the floor. "That was three months ago," is all you say as you try your best to jog your memory of the night.
That had been a particularly rough family function- with your father questioning every career choice you had made, your mother constantly criticising your outfit choice and every other relative asking you only about your plans to have kids. Seokjin had been very comforting and stayed by your side the entire night. You remember how his hand never moved from the small of your back the entire night and how he kept running circles on your palm whenever he held them. That night you were sure you had fallen for Seokjin, but you did not remember vocalising it to him. And definitely did not remember him saying it back.
Jin's strained sigh brings you back to the man in front of you, he is doing his best to look positive and lighthearted about this and you can see it.
"Why didn't you bring it up the next day?" You wanted to say sorry, you wanted to hug him but this was the only sentence that came out of your mouth. "I figured you said it in a sleepy daze. And maybe you didn't mean it." Jin sounds so small and nervous at the moment.
"But then it happened again." He adds before you can say anything and all you can say is, "HUH?"
He rubs his palm on the back of his neck and nods. "Yeah, actually you've said it 7 times in the last three months including today."
"WHAT?" Jin looks as shocked as you do at this revelation.
"Why the hell do I not remember it?" "How the hell am I supposed to know." Jin's voice comes out sharper and you realise how all of this might be for him. But he turns back to the dish on the stove and you are left to jog your memory to see if he was right.
"The second time was when I bought you the big chocolate cake when you were on your period- two months back," Jin says in the most neutral tone and the memory comes back to you.
You hadn't even informed him about your periods, he somehow always knew. But you were positively shocked when he walked into your shared bedroom with a chocolate cake in his hand, explaining that it will ease your cramps. It might've been possible that you voiced the exact feeling you were having in a moment of joy.
"Then it was a week later when you were leaving for work." Jin is now back to stirring and assessing his pot and his voice seems muffled.
"When?" He turns to look at you for a brief second, he assesses your confused face and turns back smirking.
"You said 'I love you bye' on your way out the door, I knew you didn't realise it. In fact, you did this again twice, Kookie was here during the fifth time."
"Wha- How... Do I have memory loss?" Jin turns around and you can see the smile he's trying to control. "Don't laugh, Jin. How else do you explain my not remembering saying it?" He stays leaning on the counter with his smirk playing on his face and says, "So you definitely don't remember drunkenly professing your love for me last week and then proceeding to cuddle me the entire night until I laid you on the bed in the morning right?"
If you were shocked till now it was nothing compared to this bombshell Jin dropped on you.
"Are you lying?", "No why would I!" Jin looks convincingly innocent but it only worsens your confusion. How did you miss such an important moment of both of your lives. Your husband loves you and has said so multiple times but your brain has successfully managed to forget that. You try your best to remember but nothing out of the ordinary jumps from your brain.
He breaks down laughing- screeching noises and all, as he watches you process it. Your first reaction, post-shock, is to hit him in the arms and exasperatedly pout.
"Jin, that's not fair. Why the hell did you not tell me any of this ?"
He sobers up then and stands in front of you, holding both your shoulders and a sweet smile on his face. "I didn't mean to hide it, I just thought you didn't want to bring it up. Y/N, you told me yourself that you're a flight risk and that you weren't looking for love. I didn't want to make you panic."
"Aww that's sweet of you." He nods annoyingly smug and you roll your eyes. "But I still feel horrible that I didn't even notice it fully. I mean.. how does one forget that?" Jin shakes his head at your words and gives a little squeeze to your shoulder as he says, "You didn't forget it, it just came so naturally to you that it wasn't a big deal."
You look up at his eyes hearing his words. "Was it the same for you?" Jin gulps and rubs the back of his neck again. He's turning redder by the minute and you love seeing him like this. "Well, yeah. I actually said it a week before you did for the first time." You open your mouth to react but he interrupts you. "And no, you didn't forget it. I was scared and told it when you were sleeping."
"When?"
"Aiish, I don't remember Y/N." He's almost as red as a tomato now. You scoff at his words. "Oh please, you just listed the 7 very random days I told you I love you. And I know for a fact you remember when you first said it. Spill it, Jin." Jin is fully blushing and you're sure you are too by how heated up your cheeks feel. You continue riling him up by poking his arms till he swats you away and answers your question.
"I- Oh god stop Y/N, I'll tell.", "Okay, go on."
"It was the night you suggested we sleep in the master bedroom together because you felt it was unfair that I had to sleep in the guest room." Jin covers his hands in his face and cringes at himself while you've got the biggest smile playing on your face. You start giggling and that makes him look up from his hands with a pout.
"Ya don't laugh at me!" "No, no I'm not laughing at you. It's just... that's all it took for you to fall in love with me?"
His face immediately changes from his pout to a soft smile. "That's because I didn't fall in love, and neither did you.", "Oh." You try your best to let it not show but you know that your face has deflated just the way your heart felt.
Jin notices it and smiles before adding, "We didn't fall in love, we grew into it, and that's much better. I've fallen in love before and you know what, when you fall it feels like you're flying until you crash. I think falling in love is a sad thing." He moves closer and holds your face in his palms as you look up at him without breaking eye contact. "With you, with us, we didn't fall and we won't crash. I've been in a relationship where even the smallest things were a big deal- every 'I love you' and anniversary. I'm not saying that's a bad thing, I'm just saying I really do prefer how natural it feels to just say I love you and not make a big deal of it. With you, specifically. I love how we just started doing things together without overthinking it. So yea, we grew into loving each other."
By the time he is done you're eyes are watering and the tears flow down your cheeks. He wipes them away and you just stare at him, thinking about his words. He was right, almost all of your firsts since your wedding have been entirely unspoken. One day you just cuddled against him while watching a movie and neither of you questioned it. Or when he randomly pulled you in a bear hug and cried after a tough day, or when he comforted you during your family functions and you did the same. Even when you were busy trying to fight off any feelings because of your fear, you couldn't succeed. It all felt natural.
"Y/N, please don't cry. You've been crying since the damn phone call and now I've made you cry too." You shake your head sideways and pull him into an embrace, leaning your head on his chest and sniffling your tears in. He rubs your back trying to calm you down, which you do because Jin always knows how to calm you. You lift your head from his chest and look at him, still in a tight embrace.
"How are you this smart and amazing?" He smiles shyly and then smirks before adding, "I am 3 years older than you and I know a lot more than you do!"
"Tch, what a shame I didn't record that and send it to Jungkook. He'd be so happy to see you admit that you're old." You tease and Jin looks at you in mock anger which causes you to laugh.
"I've been realising it here and there but like you said nothing felt out of the ordinary or uncomfortable enough to question it. So... okay I agree, we grew into loving each other." Jin nods with a fond smile. "Now what?" you add with raised eyebrows watching keenly as Jin smirks and his hug around you gets tighter. Your face heats up as he leans into you slowly, your eyes trained on those plump lips of his that have always caught your attention. You close your eyes and wait for his lips to hit your lips and finally fee-
TRIINGGGGG
The sound of Jin's ringtone blaring from his pant pocket makes both of you jump away from the embrace. Recovering faster from the shock, Jin picks up the phone and curses as he shows you the called ID- Jungkook.
You laugh as Jin attends the call and immediately starts cursing the younger one and Jungkoook lets out his usual Elmo giggles and shouts for you to support him.
Jin was right, this all felt natural. This is your family, your home and you'd cherish it forever.
396 notes · View notes
aseaofyoongi · 9 months
Text
caught in waves | ksj
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kim seokjin x reader (f)
genre: chef & bmx ksj | strangers to lovers | fluff | smut
rating: mature audiences only (strictly 18+)
summary: after graduating culinary school you are fired from your very first job as a sous chef — so you move to a small town for the summer only to meet the very cute nephew of the restaurant and airbnb owner.
warnings: not another smut au; strangers to lovers; thoughts of self doubt; brief mention of death beginning with the line “sleeping forever would mean.” to the end of that paragraph; parental death (jin’s unnamed mother); foul language; public sex (twice - cause wtf is a bed); clitorial stimulation; vaginal fingering; tongue fucking; six nine (m./f. receiving); face riding; penetrative sex; unprotected sex, wrap it up my brothas and sistas; creampie; riding (cowgirl); brief orgasm denial if you squint; did not proof read so sorry for any errors now; that was a mouth full but i think thats it lol
word count: 13.1 thousand words
posted: june 25, 2023 at 9am
notable songs: tangerine - anthony watts and anthony russo | otro atardecer - bad bunny | summer love - crush | seaside - seb 🎧
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The bus was nearly empty. 
Just you and two strangers with two remaining stops on the lined route. From your place at the back of the vehicle life seemed to have stopped and you were sort of trapped in the legato vibrato of the RnB beats playing in your ears. But you were here alone with rows of vacant seats ahead of you — while your eyes aimed at the everlasting fields of green pasture filled with an abundance of trees. The vermilion leaves swayed to the rhythm of the wind as the cool draft swept by gently. 
And while you sat inside the muggy bus you couldn’t help but feel like those leaves who have lost their way from home. The ones who we ripped away from their branches and were on an aimless journey only to end up on the ground. All but forgotten and only to be stepped on and torn to shred in the process. 
That was you. In a stump, torn and forgotten. 
You didn’t always hold that ideal synonymous with your name but the sparse roots in the. . circumstances of life were less than perfect and while you tried to drive down the highway of your early twenties on a steady road there were just numerous obstacles hurdled in your path. Some of which affected your life greatly and derailed you from what you believed to be intended and bestowed upon you. 
Back then, you were twenty-one just fresh off culinary school with zealous ambitions and a hunger for success that gnawed at you eagerly. You had a drive ignited in you like an overbearing fire incapable of being put out. Today, that fire lacked its fuel and there were just clouds of smoke left behind while the ashes of the once burning wood were scattered around. 
Everything in your life has gone to shit. 
In just the matter of months everything has gone to absolute shit. 
You couldn’t hear much, so you weren’t alerted to the mechanical voice triggered by the yellow pull cord. You weren’t quite sure if it was due to the music blanketing your hearing or if your sense had gone completely haywire but you couldn’t hear it. Not at all. Your eyes however could see the rectangular screen displaying the ‘stop now’ bold red letters at the front of the bus and as soon as the doors opened. The doors of the bus door opened and closed and quickly the two other passengers on the bus hopped off leaving you entirely alone. This precise moment; these surroundings, took you right back to the big city and its maze-like roads. It sent you right back to the exact time when you felt like this, entirely desolate and empty in all the worst ways possible. 
You hated it. It was suffocating and you could feel the way your airways began to constrict. You didn’t like that feeling — being alone. Yet, it always crept up on you like a lingering shadow. 
It was always fucking there. 
It wasn’t always that way. Before your sporadic travels to the isolated roads adorned by thousands of skyscrapers — back at home things were different: you had a loving family, and you were wrapped up in the warm embrace of your parents and siblings. A hug so tight sometimes you could still feel their phantom body heat warming up your skin. Their touch was your medicine and with their clutch you were cradled right into a cure for wellness. 
While you craved the warm nature of their love. You couldn’t head back home. Not after descending so harshly from the disappointment of your crushed dreams. You had pierced through earth’s stratosphere and crashed your metaphorical ship right in the middle of nowhere. 
You were astray. Off-course. Adrift. 
You couldn’t head back home. 
It’s only been six months since you left home. 
Just half a year. And everything went to shit. 
Though you knew your parents weren’t usually the type to be painted with looks of disappointment — you knew that right below disappointment sat a worse expression, one you weren’t quite ready to experience just yet: commiseration. The awful and dreadful imbue of pity. 
Their youngest had failed. Miserably. You could already see their torn expressions dashed in the horrid tones of black and white, maybe even a bit of gray. It was bad enough in the flashes of your imagination. 
God, no. You couldn’t head back home. 
Instead you ran as far away from home as you could and headed towards a small town. It was nearly invisible on the map unless under the stern squinting of the eye. But you figured a scenic change would likely bring forth a change of spirits. Perhaps, being enveloped in the vibration of the soft melody coming from the crashing of the oceans waves and the aroma of the tide in this new town could become your new remedy for the soul. 
As you neared the houses toned with aquamarine, salmon pink, and citrus yellow wood sidings the bus began braking softly nearing its final stop. 
“This is the end of the road young lady,” the bus driver announced as you peeled your headphones off, placing them around your neck. 
“Yes. Sorry,” you quickly stood up, clinging your backpack onto your back and hurdling the duffel bag over your right shoulder causing one of the straps to snap. Great. You sighed, “thank you so much.” 
“No need to apologize,” he waved off as soon as you stepped off onto the asphalt, “enjoy your stay.” 
Using the navigation on your phone turned out to be much more complicated than you’d originally thought it would be. There were countless seafood shops and though the repetition of the color on the houses was initially very appealing to the eyes you quickly realized how much harder it made it to differentiate and determine your precise location. 
Okay, currently, you stopped in front of the ice cream shop. To the right there was the souvenir store, the convenience store and the flower shop, along with dozens of other stores scattered all around — all of them sat parallel  to the boardwalk right near the beach shore right across the street. 
Kim’s Aboard. You hummed looking down at the opened up map. The blue dot was highlighted. . Still. So you were at your destination according to this, except, you were not. This was way harder than navigating your way through the big city for the first time all of those months prior. Who would’ve thought small towns would be the cherry right on top of your greatest failures. Just what you needed. What the fuck. 
Sitting on the curb you felt defeated. Feeling as if life had taken control of your life while  you were the punching bag just waiting for another jab. 
“Fuck this,” you shrugged off the duffel bag, sinking your head into your lap, “fuck life. Fuck it all.” 
Minutes passed on but you remained. There. On that lonely sidewalk. Not empty but again lonely. Fuck, you didn’t care okay? You were well past the point of feeling fazed, moving through life but not living, finally succumbing to the presumed complications of your days — officially, having given up mentally and physically through and through. 
You simply did not care. Nope. 
You didn’t. . 
Then, you felt a single droplet land on your skin. From overhead the sky was being consumed by the gloomy darkness, and soon enough you knew the clouds would begin their torrential weeping. Very soon. 
Okay. Maybe you did care after all. 
“I get it,” you hissed up at the heavens, “I am damned. Doomed. Cursed. I get it.”
You probably looked mad. Well, more on the edge of insane. Whatever, it was. It likely did not look good at all. 
“Uh,” he approached you in paced steps but the squeaking of his black finishing boots gave him away. Initially, your eyes were averted to the leaden clouds, but quickly, your eyes met him as he kneeled right beside you. The simplicity of his appearance (composed of dark denim washed overalls and absolutely nothing under — but the radiance of his honeyed complexion) drew you nearer to him. “Are you doing okay, miss?” 
His voice was sweeter than the composition of ballads and while the crashing of the ocean waves against the shore constituted its very own euphonious sonnet, in the shortness of six words listening to him was already so much better — so pleasing. 
“I-uh,” surely you remember how to talk. . Right? “I was just looking for the apartment I’ll be staying at for the next few days but I’m a bit lost.” 
“Here,” he sat beside you and his shoulder brushed yours continuously. It was distracting. Very distracting, “The trick is the town is circular shaped. Sort of like a big round about. There’s one road throughout and if you follow it through, you’ll see everything you need to see.” 
You hummed, signaling you understood his breakdown in small towns for dummies, “So, are all of the stores on this main road?” 
“Most,” he said, adjusting his blue cap now having it face backwards. His toned bicep flexed slightly when he reached up, “but there are some down the road. What store are you trying to find?” 
When you turned towards him you swore there was a glimmer of light shining down on him like a spotlight — except, that was impossible. The day was now gloomy robbing the sun of its usual glimmer. But, you weren’t crazy. You’re living it, clearly experiencing the way his radiant glow nearly blinds you. 
You were clearly gawking at him. Too immersed in the perfection outlined in his features. The richness of his dark chocolate eyes seemed as sweet as a candy bar, his full lips and the apples of his cheeks carried the same elements of the carmine mimicking the vibrancy of roses. 
You cleared your throat forcing yourself to finally rip your stare away from him, “Kim’s Abroad,” you began, “seafood store and restaurant combo but also Airbnb adjacent.” 
He chuckled, again a sound so light and airy it traveled in your inner ear like the whistles of a peaceful tune, “Kim, huh?” 
You opened the Airbnb app, moving the phone over for him to get a better look, “Yeah, Kim is what it says,” you confirmed, 
“Yeah, it does,” he looked at your phone screen, “but you’re in the wrong place.” 
“I’m in the wrong town?” 
His lips were still sculpted into a smile. Was your demise an amusement to him? You were almost offended but dimples were just so mesmerizing as they impaled his bread cheeks and you found some ease in them. Momentarily. But the man sitting beside didn’t go back on his word and suddenly there was no denying the rising panic bubbling deep in your stomach. There was no question that your luck has always been absolute shit but you never imagined it could extend this far. It never occurred to you that something like this could happen. 
You laughed and you weren’t sure if you actually found the situation amusing or if it was only a coping mechanism. Who knows perhaps you misheard what he said — Yeah, you probably. . Definitely, did, “please tell me you’re fucking with me. .” 
“Yeah, I’m fucking with you,” he smirked. The curves of his stretched lips now synonymous with the equivalent of a warm embrace yet the playfulness of a jest, “I’m Seokjin. Kim Seokjin. Kim’s Abroad is my uncle’s shop.” 
“Oh,” you finally exhaled, releasing the breath you didn’t even realize you had been holding in the first place, “you got me good.” 
“Did I scare you?” He stood from the sidewalk and dusted off the bits of sand and gravel from his bottom. 
“Did you scare me?” you huffed, “you damn near killed me.” 
“Well, technically, you are in the wrong place,” he stretched his hand out for you to grab and you did. 
“Don’t even start,” you scoffed playfully. 
“But—“ he cut in, “you’re just on the wrong part of town. Come on. Before it actually starts raining.” 
“You have a car?” 
He shrugged, “something like that.” 
Seokjin did not have a car. You’d digested the grim realization when you two of you walked to the nearby parking lot and instead of approaching the valet he walked the opposite way in the direction of the bicycle rack. 
The bike chained to the rack was blue. . a sapphire which mimicked the color of the ocean waves. It also looked pretty new and like a very competent mode of transportation as everything in this town seemed just a walk or quick ride away. 
 “Hope you don’t mind but I’m not much of a car person,” he emphasized the word car highlighting the stance of his words. And you couldn’t help but wonder why it was — that he wasn’t much of a car person — but you didn’t ask, shoving the plethora of questions right back down your esophagus determining you didn’t need to know. You didn’t know him. . Besides, he was practically your landlord. 
“Of course,” you smiled, tightening the straps on your bag to get it to sit higher on your back, “should I put this here?” you slid your duffel bag off and pointed at the red wagon attached to the bike. 
“Let me help,” Seokjin was toned and built as fuck. You had not really noticed when he approached you ten minutes prior, but now? Now, he was kneeling right in front of you using a variation of ropes to secure your bag in the wooden attachment. And while you hadn’t meant to stare you couldn’t resist the urge to drink in every detail of his every move. 
It was truly like observing an artwork in some museum. . except you had to keep reminding yourself that he was real — This was real. His muscles flexed whenever he tugged on the rope to verify its tightness and his fingers worked diligently to produce an effective knot. His long long fingers. 
Your mind couldn’t help but wonder which other activities he indulged in containing those slender digits of his. 
No. 
No. 
Focus on yourself; focus on your own journey. You shook your head in an attempt to push those beguiling thoughts aside. 
“Ready?” he asked, straddling the bike and signaling you to hop on the pegs. You simply nodded hoping on, placing your palms on his broad shoulders for support. The contact felt as if his skin had been ignited with tiny strings of fire — kind of like you hovering your palms over a burner on the stove. 
It was distracting; the way the heat particles traveled past the layers of your skin warming you to the touch. 
It was so fucking distracting the way your touch felt at ease against him. 
“This is a very small town but we have a lot to offer,” Seokjin peddled down the street — already sounding mildly out of breath having to carry both your weights. 
Your eyes settled on your surroundings; the road ahead, “I can see that. We have the beach on our left and a cozy vintage town to our right. Believe me, it is all I truly need at this very moment.” 
“What are you trying to escape from reality?” 
“More like—“ as the bike moved deeper into town and against the late afternoon wind you felt a wave of relief in your sweaty scalp and forehead, “I’m trying to get away from it forever.”
He chuckled, “forever’s a long time.” 
“Forever is categorized differently for each person,” you shrugged, “my forever could end tomorrow whereas yours could run its course for an abundance of years.”
“I suppose you’re right. .” he said, “but tomorrow is also forever away.” 
“Tomorrow is forever away.” you repeated. 
Within the cold avenues of the buzzling city tomorrow would be a blink away — sparing all extra hours, minutes and seconds right into oblivion. Tomorrow would arrive in the blink of an eye and twenty four hours would perish right into nothing. However, this town seemed different. An hour here has felt like a wrinkle in time and you were comfortably tucked under that luxury of time. 
Sparing time to stop and take everything in and time to breathe. You were spared all of the time in the world to breathe. Finally. 
Back in the city your life had been sort of a blur. The foundation of your days were composed of half assed obligations. Such as getting up to the boisterous roars of the city (which you hated), getting dressed in clothes you hated all to keep up appearances (which you hated), attending classes in an attempt to perfect your culinary skills (which you hated) and then finally going to work at that fucking restaurant until the late hours of the evening (which you guessed it — you fucking hated). There was nothing to look back on and long for and certainly nothing that you missed as everything you ever dedicated a spec of your time and energy to never truly made you happy. 
There was always a vast hole in your heart. It was huge and it only ever grew in width and no efforts ever minimized its size. The pain was great and all you could ever do was endure. 
The ride so far had been quiet and you found peace in that. It gave you a bit of time to swim in your own thoughts for a bit — something you haven’t done in quite some time. Perhaps, substituting the rustling tracks of the subway and the constant beeping of car horns for the songs of the sea would do you some good. It already kind of was. 
“You doing okay up there?” he asked, continuing to peddle his way down the black paved road. 
“I’m doing okay,” you reassured him. 
“I figured you’d just been taking everything in,” he said, “you’ve been a bit quiet.”  
“Yeah, I’m definitely admiring and loving the scarcity of skyscrapers. I like the build of the ranch-style homes. It gives the curb appeal sort of like a homey feel,” your eyes remain glued to your surroundings. While Seokjin was a sight on his own this town — you were beginning to fall in love with. 
“I agree. It’s the primary reason why I’ve yet to leave,” he parked his bike on the bike rack right in front of the two-story building. The sign read, ‘Kim’s Abroad’ in big red letters engraved in a baby blue outline against the white exterior. “We have arrived.” 
“Seafood restaurant and market,” you mumbled reading the tiny black font displayed right below the vibrant sign. 
“All things seafood restaurant and market,” he repeated, getting a hold of your luggage from his wagon, “we are connoisseurs. Don’t you forget that.” 
You giggled, “Kim Seokjin the seafood connoisseur. Noted.” 
Kim’s Abroad sat on the other side of town. Just a couple of steps away from the blue waves of the ocean crashing against the golden shores. Approximately, a ten minute bike ride away from the main pier. This side of town seemed like a hidden gem, like a slice of privacy for the locals. Though the sidewalks remained occupied with on-goers, it wasn’t as congested or loud as where you began your journey earlier that afternoon. 
Up above the weather seemed to settle down as the nimbostratus clouds were being swept away by lighter; fluffier; whiter clouds highlighting the cerulean hue of the late summer afternoon. The sun also seeped through and already your skin prickled with the rising heat. 
“Let me help with that,” you reached out to grab your backpack. 
“Help?” his eyes wide with shock, “you’re our first guest to offer assistance with their own luggage. I like you.” 
“I’ll wear the stamp of approval proudly.” 
Walking into the restaurant was like entering the multiverse of culinary delicacy. The aroma of the various seafood dishes had your stomach grumbling as hunger began its loud roar. The set-up didn’t allow much space for dining in which explained the small tables and chairs lined up outside. Seokjin walked right up to the counter with a sign right above the register which read, order here. To the right of that there was a display with numerous varieties of fish, shrimp, clams, oysters, lobsters with small chalkboards identifying the prices per pound. 
The interior design of the small shop was fairly simple yet very charming. There were wall decor items hung on the white walls in the shape of different sea creatures and fishing nets drapped from the ceiling. 
Seokjin signaled you over to join him by the register, which you did. 
“Our summer neighbor has finally joined us. She’ll be staying for the summer.” he turned towards you. Quickly, you nodded confirming. 
“Hi, I’m Seokjin’s uncle, Gong. Nice to meet you,” he stretched his hand out over the counter which you quickly shook. Gong wore a tender eye smile and pearly white teeth that glimmered under the sneaky rays of the sun invading the shop. You introduced yourself hoping to reciprocate the same amiability. 
“It’s nice to meet you too,” you added, “I’m really looking forward to spending the summer.” 
“We’re glad to have you give our little town a chance,” he said softly, “Seokjin, why don’t you show her where she’ll be staying. Then, you can come down and grab some food for the two of you.” 
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The residential area was deeper into the property. Just a couple of feet behind, Kim’s Abroad. You’d notice there was a continuation of the color white — it was neutral. But also made the small living space seem a bit bland. Colorless walls encaged a small kitchen which led right into the living room. There were two medium sized oval windows facing the ocean. A view you knew you’d spend a lot of time admiring and never getting tired of. 
Seokjin signaled over to the wooden door separating the bedroom from the living space. The bedroom was huge compared to your dorm back in University, and it was accompanied by an on suite bathroom. 
Thank God. 
If there was something you hated while in school it was the fucking communal bathrooms. The working around schedules to avoid the crowded showers, having to do your. . . Well having to take a shit (practically in public) was less than ideal and having to share bathrooms amongst ten other girls was not the most hygienic living situation you’ve had to live through.  
After dropping your bags near the bedroom door you plopped down on the full sized bed. You closed your eyes as tiredness weighed heavy on your eyelids. 
With the fluffiness of the mattress carrying your body, you sensed the way every bone, every muscle and every inch of you became cumbersome against your better judgment.  Though you tried and tried to sit up you couldn’t. It was so fucking impossible. . As if there was a ton sitting on your abdomen preventing you from doing anything. 
You were exhausted. Numb to your surroundings and your thoughts. You had honestly forgotten Seokjin was still in the room with you — that was until you felt the mattress dip right beside you. His body heat radiated off of him in waves and the warm sensation comforted you closer to a deep slumber. 
“Are you still up to eating or are you too tired?” Seokjin mumbled. His voice, so soft and poise almost as if he was afraid to blow your tympanum. 
Your eyes still remained closed. Behind them there was an invasive darkness — much darker than the night sky but there was also peace and all you wanted to do was to succumb to that very feeling. 
It kept you high and you felt light as a feather. You had never engaged in drug usage but you imagined this is what it felt like to be intoxicated. 
“I’m hungry but I’m also so tired,” you yawned almost instinctively, “I just want to sleep forever and ever.” 
“Sleeping forever would mean. . Well, you know. .” You know what he implied and though, that’s not initially what you meant you wouldn’t mind that either. Sleeping forever was peaceful and would spare you the burden of figuring out whatever the fuck your life has turned into. Imagine falling into a deep slumber and roaming over into the afterlife peacefully; serenely. Or maybe not. There were a million thoughts etched onto your brain and while you tried to make sense of it all, you couldn’t. You didn’t mind it but there was also a tug at your heart just urging to allow yourself to see things through. 
“I just meant. .” you paused, “I just meant I’m really really tired.”
“I know. .” he stood from where he sat on the bed and your eyes met him by the door. “Are you still down to get food though?” 
“Have you heard my stomach?” His smile was contagious as you'd quickly learned as a smile was painted on your lips as soon as his lips carved into a bright beam almost as illuminating as the golden star prancing in the late afternoon sky, “I think hunger trumps sleep at this moment.” 
That was a fib. But you didn’t really feel like being left alone with your thoughts at the moment — they were loud, overwhelming and deprecating.  To be honest you’d been lonely for way too long and you hated basking in the solitude of your own company. It’s not what you wanted or what you needed. 
Perhaps, tomorrow will be kinder. 
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The sun was less brutal now. 
Likely, because the sun was en route to kiss the ocean as it continued to move closer and closer towards the horizon. The blazing star still had quite a journey ahead but it no longer sat in the middle of the sky shining down with its stinging rays. 
Late afternoons were always your favorite part of the day. Back in the city the congestion of buildings on every street wouldn’t allow for this kind of life; for a scenery like this — and again you began to feel at ease in your heart. You love it. The loud cackling of the neighborhood kids, the sound of skateboards, skates and bikes against the pavement, the smells of backyard barbecues and the briny waters just ahead, which was technically your front yard for the summertime. 
Back in the metropolis you’d learn to suffer through each passing day. Falling into the safety nets of routines and hoping for a better tomorrow.  
There was never fulfillment or satisfaction, just emptiness. A profound and very overbearing emptiness that swallowed you from the inside right into a dark pit of nothingness. 
“I hope you’re not vegan or anything,” Seokjin took a seat right beside you on the ledge of the building, your legs dangling from the edge, “otherwise we’d have to head back into town for some more dining options.” 
“I’m not vegan,” you confirmed. 
“Good, cause uncle Gong made us some crab cakes. He swears they’re his specialty but it’s my recipe,” he beamed. 
“Bullshit. .” I raised my eyebrow at his claim. 
“I’m serious!” he took a bite of the fritter, “well actually it was my mom’s but she taught me how to make it.” 
Was. Past tense. Did he realize he’d refer to his mother’s existence in such a way? He must’ve. Then, that would mean she’s no longer here. . No longer in Seokjin’s life. Did she abandon him or did she pass away? There were a million questions roaming around in your head but again you didn’t dare ask. 
Though, it was hard to imagine him caged in the torment of sorrow. Sure, everyone experiences it sooner or later but it just didn’t seem like him. You’d met him just a couple hours prior and you could already tell Seokjin was a bright soul. With a tender gaze that wrapped you up like a warm blanket and a smile that could ease any burden or pain even in the absence of words.
Already, you’d felt closer to him than anyone you had crossed paths back in the despondent sidewalks of the city. 
Seokjin is a friend. He is your friend. 
“Well, her recipe is amazing,” you utter in between bites, “so thank you for passing it on to your uncle to make.”
“It was my pleasure,” he smiled. 
A brief silence fell between the two as you finished your meal but you didn’t mind the lack of words. It was just the two of you, the lullaby of the waves, and the orange and pink hues set the sky ablaze as the sun continued its journey sinking deeper into the horizon.
Life here seemed to come right out of a painting — sort of like those you would see hung on the wall of an art exhibit and be completely divulged into, finding shelter behind the intricate lines and vibrant colors. 
“Where are those kids headed?” you asked, nodding towards the kids speeding down the street in skates and skateboards. 
“There’s a skatepark down the street,” he said, “I ride my bike there all the time whenever I wanna run away from kitchen duty.” 
“Kitchen duty?” you tittered. 
“You think I’m bullshitin’ again don’t you?” 
“You said it, not me.” 
He shook his head, laughing quietly at your playful banter, “do I not seem like a chef who also happens to be into bmx?” 
“I’d have to see you partake in both of those activities to believe it,” you shrugged. 
“I’m on prep duty early morning so I’ll get back to you on the cooking thing but we can begin with the skate park tomorrow,” Seokjin offered. 
“Tomorrow it is.” 
Seokjin swung back and forth, he seemed to have something on his mind but his lips remained sealed until finally he spoke, “What about you? Do you have any hobbies?” 
“Yeah,” you picked at the blue chipped nail polish on your nails, “I went to culinary school actually. I was a sous chef back in the city but I was fired.” 
“Oh, shit,” Seokjin’s eyes were the size of pool balls, “Led me right into the lion’s den. Didn’t you? Now, I can’t cook for you. You’d put me on the chopping block.” 
“I promise I won’t,” you clasped your hands together, “Contrary to what you might believe, cooking is not my passion.” 
“Parents?” he didn’t need to elaborate, you understood perfectly. 
“Kind of. .” You moved your head from side to side, “They didn’t really influence my decision but my dad’s a chef and I thought I needed to be just like him.” 
“And you learned you didn’t?” 
“Exactly,” you nodded. 
“So what’s your true passion?” 
“Art. I’ve always wanted to illustrate books,” you turned away sensing you’d peel too much back. Perhaps, you have. Perhaps, not but no one had ever asked you that before. No one has ever shown even the slightest interest in learning what fills your heart with joy and consumes your days with a sense of accomplishment, “it was my minor in college.” 
“You should go for it.” 
“You don’t even know if I’m good..” 
“I don’t need to,” he tilted his head in your direction, he was glowing — truly the textbook definition of beauty, “I can see the way your eyes twinkle at the mere mention of it. You should do what makes you happy.” 
“What makes you happy?” 
“This place.” His words weren’t elaborate yet somehow you kind of understood exactly what he meant. 
“What makes you stay?” 
“That’s what keeps me here,” he nodded signaling out to something in front of him but you couldn’t really decipher what he was pinpointing. 
Finally, your thoughts settled, “the people?” 
“The tide,” his chestnut eyes remained on the scenery laid out in front of the two of you. Then he continued, “it’s always serene; peaceful. And even in the havoc of storms the ocean manages to sing a tune that fills me with comfort. It calms me down.” 
“The tide.” You mumbled in solidarity with his words. Because it was true. The ocean was a music box kept open and the more you sat and listened the more at ease you felt. 
As if you were meant to be here, like you belonged here, right where you were. 
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Remnants of the night before flashed in your mind and you remember Seokjin’s sweet words as he communicated that the roof was your official hideout as it was closed off to the public and uncle Gong despised climbing anymore stairs than he had to — a place where only the two of you could escape to and just get to know each other for hours and hours. You really liked the sound of that. 
You yawned, rubbing sleep off of your lids and walking into the bathroom to carry out your morning routine. Soon, you moved over to the kitchen preparing yourself a quick breakfast composed of eggs and toasts. After your rooftop adventure Seokjin had accompanied you back into the main part of town to grab a few groceries at the mini super market. Thank God for that. 
Time was now nearing the late afternoon and after throwing on a pair or shorts and a crop top you were flying out the front door, down the stairs and towards Kim’s Abroad. Seokjin said he had the early shift today. It was too early in the day for customers but he was helping with prep before the restaurant opened in about 15 minutes for the lunch rush. 
“You ready?” he asked, exiting the shop through the back door and hanging his apron on a hook you couldn’t particularly see. It was astounding how fine Seokjin looked even in the simplest outfits. Like today, he wore denim shorts which cut off mid-thigh, a white tank, black converse and the same backwards blue baseball cap which he tucked his floppy bangs under to keep them away from his face. 
“Ready.” you confirmed following him to the bike rack as he began unlocking his bicycle from the metal bar. 
Again, for the third time since you two met you hopped on the pegs placing your hands on his shoulders to keep yourself from falling off the back of his bike. You looked down at his soft golden skin stretching over his massive shoulders. You hadn’t noticed the day before but Seokjin was well-built. The dark veins stretched up the dorsal side of his hand and forearm as he gripped the handlebars steering the bike down the street. His bicep flexed whenever he pressed on the hand brakes. 
It was distracting. But whenever you tried to take in your surroundings and drink in the beauty of this town you found your gaze focused on him. 
He was the swirls of black and white psychedelic lines inducing you into a state of hypnosis — demanding your attention be set on him and refusing you spare even a second thinking of anything else. 
That gravitational pull you felt drawing you closer to him despite how close in proximity he was terrifying. You barely knew him and already you felt as if you’d known him forever. 
“We’re here,” he said, pulling up to the green metal bench inside of the skate park. Hoping off, you finally peeled your eyes away from Seokjin and looked ahead to the crowded park adorned with ramps, stairs, rails, dips and countless other obstacles.
“What if. .” you began, ogling the kids successfully landing their tricks, amazed by their effortless talent, “what if they get hurt?” 
“They stand up and just try again.” Surely, it couldn’t be that simple. It must hurt. It had to hurt. Your past of disdained misfortune resulted in you landing on the floor, head first, one too many times which hurt like hell. Those were slips and stumbles nothing hard enough to cause any real damage — you really couldn’t imagine busting your ass here on this fucking concrete. 
“Standing back up must hurt so fucking bad though.” 
“It does,” he pointed out the scars adorning his upper and lower extremities — some healed, some not. 
“So you spend a lot of time with these kids huh?” you asked, simply wanting him to open up a bit more; to learn all of the details unique to him. Those details which made Seokjin who he was.
“Sometimes. When I’m not in the shop,” he shrugged, taking a seat right beside you on the bench. His thighs rubbing up against yours, “don’t go judging me for hanging around here on my down time. I’m not the only twenty year old in this skate park.” 
“I wasn’t judging.”
“Your eyes tell.” 
“Are you saying I’m easy to read?” you asked, his eyes shed their usual tone of dark brown under the sun rays now glowing closer to caramel. 
“Right now you are,” you didn’t know if you were daydreaming but his vision continued to circle your features, first back and forth between your eyes and then lower down to your lips. 
“Are you going to show me what you got or are you just going to sit here all afternoon,” your voice barely above a whisper. You were afraid your stupid mind would lead you to do something stupid. 
“Actually. .” he pulled a pair of white and purple skates from the backpack he previously carried on his back, “we’re here for you.” 
“Absolutely not.” 
“Why not?” 
“I know we only met approximately twenty-four hours ago but I have a confession to make,” you cleared your throat and he moved closer towards you, (As if that could even be possible. . He was practically sitting on top of you), wanting to preserve your privacy, “I’m a klutz. I’m clumsy. I am a walking liability.” 
“Now, you’re just making things up.” 
You shook your head, “I’m not making it up.” 
“If that is the case then it’s okay,” he pushed the skates closer in your direction, “I’m here to help.” 
“I just hope you have a first aid kit near.” 
Seokjin reached into his bag showing me a red pouch with a white cross on it. A wide smile plastered on his face. “I’m always ready.” 
“Of course, you are,” you grabbed the skates from his hands, “ but I’m expecting you to catch me if I fall.” 
“I will, don’t worry. I’ll always be here to catch you.” 
In the middle of your chest, where the seat of your soul beat rhythmically on its day to day course, today in that moment, after those two words were uttered from his dulcet lips there was a stutter in your palpitations and for a brief moment you felt a ping at your chest. It hurt so much — but it also reminded you that you were alive. 
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Beads of sweat strolled down your temples as you tried to maneuver the roller blades strapped to your feet. Your balmy palms remained clasped against Seokjin's holding on for dear life. Your eyes were glued to the floor but you continued leaning into his guidance, determining that you would get it and you would not stop until you did. 
Seokjin was extremely patient. Even with your frequent squealing and the death grasp you maintain, he remained calm. Slowly guiding you over the small ramps and the mini cylindrical cone shaped obstacle with the flat tops. 
“You got this,” his words of encouragement dozed you with overconfidence and soon you began feeling invisible. As if you could conquer this and anything else thrown your way no matter how big or difficult. 
With his guidance and instructions you continued being led around the skatepark with your knees slightly bent, your upper body leaning towards him for balance and the slowed gliding of the eight wheels against the pavement. 
“You’re doing great,” he wore a gleeful grin.
You didn’t know if his praise was tainting your lack of better judgment but the words escaped your lips before you even realized what you said,  “can I try it by myself?”
“I don’t think that’s a good idea. I forgot your helmet, knee and elbow pads,” he guided you towards the green bench once again, “let’s keep your first lesson simple. Just until we come back with the proper equipment. Yeah?” 
You nodded. “Yeah, you’re probably right. I think that was the adrenaline talking.” 
“I hope that means you’ve enjoyed yourself.” 
“Of course, as long as I’m invited I’ll definitely be tagging along more often,” you smiled. 
“You’re always invited.” 
Unlike the betrayal of your tremulous legs and arms while skating Seokjin maneuvered his bike with confidence. He dropped into the bowl without hesitation, then jumped. . levitating in mid air. You were stunned, it was as if he could fly — soaring in the sky like an eagle. He did it again, and again, and again and you cheered him on loudly hoping to reciprocate a fraction of the support he’d expressed as he helped you skate. 
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“How did you even manage to do that. . without even breaking a sweat?” you were still stunned as the two of you walked down to the shore after leaving his bike back home after leaving the skatepark. Home. Well, temporary home. 
He shrugged, still a cocky smirk planted on his lips, “I used to practice a lot.” 
“You’ve got to teach me to do all of that.” 
“First, I gotta teach you to not fall off your skates.” 
“Right,” you smiled. 
The two of you walked right beside each other leaving no room for space in between — your hands kept brushing against one another and that friction alone radiated prickles of heat to crawl on your skin. 
“You’ll get it soon,” he leaned towards you, bumping his shoulder into yours, “you’re an amazing student. . So far.” 
“So far?” you gasped, taking fake offense at his meager ‘compliment’. 
“So far,” he nodded, “. . because you also did try to go off riding on your own after one lesson.” 
“I didn’t go off running,” you rolled your eyes, “I asked if I could. Drama queen.” 
“Because I was holding on.” 
You shook your head, “again, drama queen.” 
You and Seokjin walked on the sidewalk parallel to the shore line for quite some time now but he kept babbling about this secret spot he swore was worth it. Without a line of questions or an inch of hesitation you followed along knowing that each adventure promised contained a photo album of memories in your mind to go along with it. Still, you didn’t mind the distance and you didn’t care what the destination looked like as long as the plans involved having Seokjin presence right there with you.  
“This way,” he said, cutting down a small pathway leading towards the beach, “I don’t think your flip flops will cut it though,” 
“We’re not too far from the house. I could go back for some sneakers.” 
“There’s no need for that. We’re practically almost there. Come on,” he crouched down in front of you. Was he really insinuating you’d do what you thought he was? “Hop on.” 
Whoever said Mt. Everest was the highest peak on planet Earth was fucking lying.  Though, you have never found yourself on the mountains’ slope, already, you knew being carried on Seokjin’s back was far more exhilarating than any other journey you could embark up the Himalayas. From his back, the world seemed anew. It was brighter, clearer and scorching too. You weren’t really sure if that was because his height boosted you a bit closer to the sun or if it was because his palm rested on your bare thighs, holding you in place as he ascended down the large rocks. 
Perhaps, this is the kind of freedom he felt while riding his bike at the skatepark, quickly you began to understand why he chose that high. 
“Are you doing okay?” he asked. 
“Yeah, I’m fine.” Except you weren’t. His touch was ardent against your skin and while it felt like you played too close to fire, it was also addicting. All you knew is you wanted to feel that blaze on every inch of your body consuming you into lively flames. 
“We’re almost there.” 
“Hey Seokjin, can I ask you a question?” 
“Whatever you wanna know. I’ll answer,” you wrapped your hands around his neck, resting your elbows on his shoulders. His warm breath fanned your arms causing goosebumps to etch on your skin. For a brief second he rested his head against your forearm before continuing, “but first please call me you gotta start calling me Jin.” 
“Jin,” you mumbled, “it suits you.” 
He chuckled, “you had a question?” 
“Yeah,” you cleared your throat, “back at the skatepark you said you used practiced a lot. . on your bike.” 
“I did.” 
“You’re still referring to it in past tense.” 
“I am.” 
“Why?” you really didn’t want to push too far but you also had a desire to ask and know. 
“BMX, the competitions,” he began, “it’s something I did in the past.” 
You furrowed your brows, “But you still do it. What I mean is you still go to the skatepark.” 
He sighed, where was something weighing on his heart. You could feel it, “Yeah, now it’s just a pastime. Something I hold onto. Just to have some sort of life line between the old me and the present version myself.” 
You and Jin were polar opposites. While he chose to dwell in the past, in the blink of an eye you ditched yours back in the city. Without hesitation you abandoned your sluggish life as a caterpillar lurking through the shadows of skyscrapers — awfully slow and urging a better brighter tomorrow. Metamorphosis indicates that after the cocooning stage the insect should blossom into a beautiful butterfly. You weren’t at that last stage yet but you hoped one day you would be. 
“What was the old you like?” 
He shrugged with sour thoughts tugging the corner of his mouth downward, “I was young. . way too young obviously and naive but I also urged for calmer waters.” 
“Did riding help out?” you asked. 
“It did. It helped quite a lot for a long time,” he mumbled, “. .until it didn’t anymore and now I guess I’m trying to make peace with it.” 
“Is there a particular reason why it ever stopped helping?” You felt his muscles tensed as his slender fingers sunk a bit deeper into your skin. It didn’t hurt but you’d hit something you were trying to avoid, “I’m sorry. I didn’t mean to pry.” 
“Don’t worry about it,” his feet finally came in contact with the golden grains of sand but he didn’t make any effort to put you down. No, he only held on tighter, “it just drags along a string of. .” he paused, “memories.” 
“Bad. . memories?” 
“Bad memories,” he confirmed. 
The ocean sang its soulful tune just a couple of feet away as the waves continued their rhythmic crashing on the shore. It was soothing. . peaceful and it eased your nerves against his warm palms. 
“During that time. .”  he began, sighing heavy as the soles of his feet continued sinking into the sand as you trotted further down the beach, “I was wandering around aimlessly—in my head for too long. I lost someone close. Someone who I loved more than I even tolerate myself.” 
“Jin, I’m so sorry.” 
“It’s okay,” there was a slight tremble in his voice, as if he was trying to get a massive knot down his esophagus, “it happened years ago.” 
“Still, time measures no grief. It must’ve been hard then and it probably still is,” unconsciously, you found yourself laying your head against the back of his neck, “but it is okay to feel, and cry and allow ourselves time to process and make our own peace. We’re only human after all.” 
“I’m still trying to make peace with it everyday but I choose to remember our positive days,” his eyes focused on the footprints he left behind on the sand, “her love, her embrace and tenderness, her charisma. . it was very easy to love her.” 
Her? Her. 
The only woman he’s ever referred to in the past tense was his mother shortly after the two of you met. You wanted to ask and express proper condolences. Not to be nosey but to be there for him and provide a shoulder for him to lean on. Make sure he’s actually okay, although he seems to be dealing with things well you still don’t want to trigger any melancholy memories. 
“The good memories will keep her alive and grounded in your heart,” your hand hovered over the center of his chest. “I’m glad you’re on the road to making peace.” 
“Yeah, me too.” 
“You should continue riding though,” you murmured, “Despite what happened I’ve seen you soar on your bike. It makes you happy and you should do what makes you happy.” 
“Yeah, yeah,” he giggled, “I see what you’re doing.” 
You gasped, “I have no idea what you’re talking about.” 
“Of course not,” he laughed. 
“I mean it though.”
“I know,” his hands roamed higher down the avenue of your thighs a bit closer to your bum but not quite. The feeling was sensational—vertiginous and you’d be lying if you said you hadn’t read through all of the scenarios blooming in your head. . The ones where his touch doesn’t  just stop mid way up your thighs. No, instead he continues inching higher and higher until. . “Thank you,” 
His words pulled you out of your daydream yet you still felt the despotic heat coursing through your body. Too potent to ignore. 
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Seokjin’s secret spot is breathtaking. A monument right out of a National Geographic magazine cover. The two of you lay in the small cave with an oculus skylight at the top allowing the sun to peek through when it sat high on the cerulean sky along with two archways opened right up to the roaring sea. 
The grains of the golden sand felt therapeutic and warm under your indolent frame. There was a brisk breeze cooling you down, not too cold but just cool enough to dry your previously balmy skin. 
It was a slice of heaven. . right here, right now. 
And Jin, he laid right beside you his body heat radiating in eminent waves. Finally his dark strands on full display no longer hidden under the cap the way it’s been since you met him days prior. His shirt was off displaying his sculpted physique which captivated your attention entirely. 
Seokjin’s secret spot is breathtaking but so was he. And fuck was it blinding the way he was shining brighter than the amber star overhead. He was ravishing; stunning through and through. 
“Was the trip worth it?” he asked, his dark eyes burning a hole at your side. 
“I barely made as much as a trip, you carried me the entire way here,” you scoffed, “is your back really doing okay?” 
He rolled his eyes, “for the hundredth time my back is doing just fine.” 
“So, let me ask you, was the trip worth it with me on your back the entire time?” your expression was deadpanned.
“Wrong question. .” he smirked. “Did my hands and back find comfort in carrying you the entire way? Yes.” 
His hands on you. Your mind flashed in spurs to that very moment where his warm touch birthed goosebumps on your skin. Quickly, that feeling became looped in your mind and even now, when his hands were no longer on you, you felt it—God, you felt it. 
“And the truth comes to light,” you tutted, kissing your teeth and shaking your head in disapproval, “is that all you wanted? To feel me up, Jin?” 
The apples of his cheeks were dusted in a deep roseate shade, “I mean. . it’s not all I wanted.” 
“Are you blushing, Seokjin?” you mumbled, “I thought this was a confessional. I mean you enjoyed having your hands on me the entire way here, right?” 
“Right,” The crimson shade traveled to the tips of his ears. He’s bashful; how cute. 
“Jinnie?” 
He hummed. 
“I also enjoyed it,” you said, “it’s too bad though.”  
“What is?” His eyes were doe-like, holding a luminous glimmer which projected the intricate ocean waves on them as they continued rocking right before you. 
“Your hands never really made it where I needed them.” 
He gulped, “and where was that?” 
“I think you know exactly what I’m talking about,” your fingertips toyed with the button of your shorts. Typically, you weren’t this forward and simply let your misfortune map the adverse roads of your life but today you didn’t care to fight against yourself. You wanted him. You needed him, “of course, we can pick up where you left off and actually progress higher this time.” 
“Yeah,” he nodded. 
“Are you okay with that?” 
“I’m so okay with that.” 
“Is that the only way in?” you pointed in the direction the two of you came in. 
“Boats can pull up through the archways as well,” Jin’s bottom lip was tucked under his lips and his gaze devouring you entirely. 
Of course, you began the show by slipping your hands under the fabric of your denim shorts. Your middle finger began drawing vertical lines against your clothed slit—dragging it slowly. Up and down, again and again, until the friction became useless to your zealous desire. 
“Then, we better be quick,” you breathed out. 
“I better be quick,” he emphasized moving closer to you. 
The shadows of his face were so close to yours you could draw out every little feature and decipher the hints of eucalyptus and mint from his morning shampoo. Your hands landed on his cheek, leading him closer to you; pressing your bodies to one another. 
Seokjin’s lips were warm and soft like velvet moving in a uniformed dance against yours. It was slow yet passionate as if he was trying to savor every inch of your lips—as if he wanted to be consumed by the taste of your tongue. 
The pads of his fingers left behind a trail of goosebumps as they moved lower and lower, until they came in contact with your shorts. In a swift moment he unbuttoned them and began drawing small figures onto your skin right where the hem of your panties sat. 
Between his lips and his touch you felt inebriated, as if you were mindlessly roaming around somewhere between the clouds and the sky. 
He pulled away but his forehead rested on yours. His lips still hovered over yours as his paced pants fanned his cool breath on them. 
“Can I. .?” 
“Please, Seokjin. Please touch me,” the pleads dripped from your lips semi-automatically and you had to admit there wasn’t a hint of shame to hold you back. 
There was nothing on earth more exhilarating, more enlivening than the feeling of Jin’s hands sinking under the fabric of your silk underwear. Not riding a roller coaster, not climbing the highest mountain on earth, not even winning the fucking lottery. His touch was intoxicating. . just like his kisses and there was nothing you’d rather feel. Except, probably a bit, more. 
“Faster, please,” you whined, swaying your hips against his touch as he drew circles on your aching clit. If obeying and compliance was a stern trait then it is one Jin conveyed with no push backs or arguments. 
“Tell me something doll,” his fingers traveled lower lining up against your entrance. He pressed against your cunt but never pushed past—the squelching of your wetness echoed in your ears. It was all you could hear, “did you ever think we’d be in this predicament this early on?” 
You gasped, urgently shaking your head as his fingers became wrapped in your walls moving in and out of you slowly, “I-I didn’t. But I did hope for it.” 
He sneered, “you hoped for it, huh?” 
“Dreamt of it on my first night here actually.” 
“I dreamt of it too, you know,” he whispered softly, his lips traced the shell of your ear, “the way you’d feel, your sweet sounds, the way you’d be clenching around me the exact same way you are right now.” 
His name was a mantra laced on your tongue and you uttered it once and once again as if it was muscle memory. The only thing, the only name coherent enough in your head—the only one you knew, which was probably true. You couldn’t even recall your own. 
But he had no mercy on you, his digits had no mercy on you—they just moved in and out of your slickness quicker and quicker as time progressed and you were so close, you practically stood at the edge as your orgasm approached in a massive wave. 
“Please,” you moaned, “please let me-“ 
He shook his head, “Just a bit longer, doll.” 
You hadn’t even realized your eyes were shut tight, the back of your eyelids tainted with desperation. And Jin was no longer stationed beside you, instead he kneeled in front of your bent legs spreading them farther and farther away from each other. 
The ocean still sat just a couple feet ahead, still singing that soulful song which eased your nerves the longer you laid on that very sand waiting—urging for Jin’s touch on you. 
It was all you could think of. . the way his touch burned trails of passion on your skin leaving behind a desire so potent that you just couldn’t extinguish without his help.  
He was the only one who could put it out. 
Seokjin removed both your shorts and panties leaving them pooled at your ankles. His austere gaze remained on your cunt and he seemed to be drinking in every detail of your blossomed rose. 
“Beautiful,” he mumbled, almost inaudibly.  
“Jin,” your eyes, your voice both dripped with desperation. 
He nodded understanding your unspoken command almost instantly inching closer and closer between your thighs until his face sat just a couple inches away. His tongue was frigid against your slit it weaved a bolt of electricity intertwined along the ridges of your spine. A gasp escaped your lips as he perfected the combination of sucking and licking your sensitive bud before dragging his flattened tongue along your folds. 
A delectable repetition. One, more saccharine than any dessert you’d had the burden of making back during your days in the kitchen. 
This was better. It was so much fucking better. 
Seokjin’s slurp noises against you, your sweet incoherent sounds and the cries of the ocean were one in the same. All of them were the end product of an orchestrated ballad. 
“Jinnie,” your nails massaged his scalp before gripping his face, pushing him closer to you. God, you needed him closer. So much fucking closer. 
“Yes, doll?” His words almost muffled an evident refusal to stop what he was doing. 
“Can I h-help you out?” 
“With?” he continued. 
“Even from up here I can see how tight your shorts have become,” you hissed, “I want you in my mouth while you eat me out.” 
Seokjin pulled away. Your juices coated his chin and mouth, “That’s fine baby, but I want you sitting on my face.” 
Jin took your spot sprawled out on the sand. You climbed on top of him, placing your knees on either side of his face claiming your seat on his features. His hands snaked around your thighs, pulling you down, positioning your soaked cunt to be aligned with his mouth. Meanwhile, you leaned forwards helping him pull down and finally kick off his briefs. 
Seokjin was big. Bigger than you’d imagined. 
Your hand wrapped around the base of his cock as you took his tip past your lips, finally getting a taste of his pre-cum. At the same time you felt him take a swipe on your fold before his eloquent tongue dug inside you diligently licking your walls, ridding them off your juices. 
The iteration of a sinful melody. Building up tension in the pit of your stomach while your back arched and your toes curled. 
Though, you tried to focus on the way his cock moved in and out of your mouth—his deathly grasp on your thighs and his tongue. . It was all too distracting. 
“Fuck, Jin,” you keen too dazed in pleasure to fully grasp the way you tugged on his hair keeping his head in place as you began to grind on his face, finally succumbing to the urgency of reaching your approaching peak. 
He hummed under you, leading your unoccupied hand down to his cock and guiding it up and down his shaft. This went on for some time. Felt like forever and then finally he came in warm spurts coating your hand. And that very image drove you to your climax as he licked you dry. 
Carefully, you climbed off his face and laid right beside him, his chest heaving as he attempted to catch his breath. 
Your name sounded like peaches in his strained voice, “you. . that was amazing.”  
“You’re amazing,” you giggled, “but once again you did all the work.” 
“I don’t mind doing all the work,” he leaned over leaving peppered kisses on your cheek. 
“You say that to all the girls who occupy the Airbnb?” 
“Nope,” he emphasized the p, “just you.” 
“I find that hard to believe. Just look at you.” 
“You think my charms and good looks are hard to resist?” he beamed. 
“That and the third leg in between your thighs.” 
He laughed. “Well, believe it. You’re the only girl I’ve done. . anything with for years.” 
Your heart beat rhythmically in your chest at the utterance of his confession. His words didn’t mean much at all but you couldn’t help the fluffers in your head and the way your stomach felt so giddy you thought you’d vomit. 
It felt foreign but you welcomed it nevertheless. You liked that feeling. 
“You wanna go swimming?” you asked. 
“Skinny dipping?” he quirked a brow. 
“You’re not worried about someone coming?” 
“If someone’s come in for the past like fifteen minutes they saw me neck deep in your pussy,” he stood up taking off his shirt and leaving his shorts behind before running towards the aquamarine waves, “I don’t really think it matters anymore.”
“If?” you asked following behind him. 
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The day before yesterday was a dream. 
A dream, no a wet dream. Composed of your fervent fantasies. And you? You lived in that cave and you probably would for the rest of your time here. Dwelling on his warm touch on your skin—goosebumps rose on every inch of your body causing the hairs on the back of your neck to stand straight. 
Your fingers followed the trails he’d mapped on your body, paved so intricately, they were so easy to follow and all roads led to the same exact place. 
You were so wet, but you probably had been ever since that day. Was that normal? You didn’t care, you just wanted him to touch you again. 
There was a knock on the door waking you right out of your daydreams. Grabbing your robe you wrapped it around your figure before heading towards the door. 
“Hey,” you opened the door standing aside allowing him to come in. 
“I’m sorry I’ve been MIA since yesterday,” he kissed your cheek—you guys weren’t nearly official but it kind of felt like you were. . or you hoped so anyway, “Uncle Gong has been on edge lately. There’s another seafood restaurant opening up on the pier. It's got him going crazy.” 
“Crazy prep hours?” 
He sighed before slouching down on the couch, “crazy prep hours,” he confirmed. 
“You must be so tired,” you cooed, “do you want anything to eat? I can make you something.” 
“I’m okay, besides food is not exactly what I’m craving.” 
“Hm,” you straddled his lap. “Then, what is?”
“I should’ve kissed you after I ate you out yesterday,” his hands slid under your robe kneading your upper thighs, “you would’ve gotten a chance to see how addicting you taste.” 
His phone began buzzing, it was Uncle Gong. Jin sighed before pressing the accept button and in a matter of seconds you heard the older man’s voice in a frantic banter. 
You were one hundred percent sure it wasn’t Uncle Gong’s intention to cockblock but you just wanted Seokjin to stay and fuck you into the mattress. 
You were still dripping just thinking about it. However, by the look on his face you were certain he had other news—ones which hindered your fantasies of early morning sex. 
“I gotta go.” 
“Do you have to?” you whined. 
“I don’t want to,” he leaned over, leaving a kiss on your lips. It was brief and your body screamed for more but you didn’t vocalize it. Instead you sat in silence as he continued to carry out a mental battle attempting to find a victo. He had to go, you knew that much. You also knew he wanted to stay. You wanted him to as well but he couldn’t. 
He stood from the couch but before he could make his way towards the front door Jin turned back around, kneeling right before you. His hand reached up cupping your face as he leaned closer until his silken lips landed back on yours. However, this wasn’t just another peck. 
This kiss. 
It swept you under the currents of the bestial sea and you sank deeper towards the ocean floor but you weren’t scared. In the void, under the darkness of the tide Jin was a beacon of light—guiding you towards an eternity where his lips kept moving on yours the way they were right now. 
This fucking kiss. 
Is your beginning but also your end. 
It took your last breath but also made you feel alive. 
You didn’t want it to end. . but it did, “meet me at the restaurant tomorrow tonight. Uncle Gong is letting me prepare something for you. Took a lot of convincing but I had him come around.” 
“I’ll be there.” 
“Seven o’clock.” 
“Just twenty four hours.” 
He smiled before closing the door behind him. 
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Back in the city dating was rather difficult. 
Not only were you a workaholic, you also avoided any kind of social events and situations outside of the restaurant. 
Here, things were a bit different. You came here for a chance at self reflection, to work on yourself and find the real you but instead your path became intertwined with Seokjin and while you didn’t mind you also couldn’t help but reprimand your heart whenever it skipped a beat at the sight of him. 
Sort of like it was doing right now, Jin was in the kitchen of Kim’s Abroad and you sat at the small table set-up for a candlelit dinner for two. 
The gears in the rules of the universe shifted Noone ever went through this kind of trouble—to plan something this nice after they’d already had their fun with you. Especially if things would have taken their  course as easily as they did with him. 
Well, except, maybe Seokjin. 
Cute. 
“Tonight’s special,” he set both of your plates on the table revealing a cut of grilled salmon garnished with lemon wedges, and accompanied by coconut rice and roasted potatoes, “I hope you like it. . but please do lie if you hate it. I’m sensitive.” 
You laughed, mounting your spoon with the perfect bite of all the foods he’d prepared combined before taking it in your mouth, your taste buds danced in delight, “Seokjin, this is heavenly. It is truly amazing.” 
“Is that the honest truth or are you just looking to spare my feelings?” 
“I would never lie,” you swallowed before continuing, “This is all absolutely delicious.” 
“Better than Uncle Gong’s crab cakes?” 
“I thought that was your recipe?” 
“It is,” he shrugged, “but he thinks he makes them better than me.” 
“I don’t know, I think he wins this war,” you joked, “those crab cakes were killer.” 
“Traiter,” he scoffed.
Dinner was exquisite but small talk was left to a minimum when you both realized Uncle Gong’s restaurant curfew was quickly approaching. After cleaning up and closing up you and Seokjin headed towards the roof, unwilling to give up the night and let it cease. 
The street lights lit up the street corners and while there were people roaming around here and there—it was nothing compared to the congested afternoons. 
But you liked this. 
The feeling of you and Seokjin being the only people left behind in the world, the songs of the waves still playing in the background and the stars gleaming overhead. 
“Has this always been your secret spot?” you asked, laying beside him on the navy blue duvet. 
“Yes,” his eyes glowed under the light of the moon, again they looked lighter than you’d remembered, “I practically lived up here like three summers ago.” 
“An escape?” you asked, not really needing to emphasize. 
He nodded, “after mom passed the house choked me with her lingering presence, her scent, her love. I wanted her back. To spend just one more day with her and make sure she knew how much I loved her and how much I would miss her but that’s just not how life worked and she was no longer there.” 
“I’m so sorry,” you snuggled closer into him, laying your head on your chest—his heartbeat thumped against your ear, “I can’t even imagine how hard that time must have been.” 
“It was,” he laid his head on yours, “It was harder than hard if that even makes sense. I shut a lot of things out and no longer found comfort in the things I loved. .” he paused. 
“Like riding?” 
“Yeah,” he sighed, there was a slight tremble in his voice, “it’s just mom wasn’t there to cheer me on anymore. Looking out at the stands was depressing because her usual seat was empty. Sadness overshadowed everything on the track, she was all I could think of.” 
You didn’t say anything, just allowed him to carry on without interruptions. He continued, “Uncle Gong tagged along whenever he didn’t have to manage the restaurant but it just wasn’t the same, you know?” 
You hummed letting him know you still listened attentively. 
“Wounds heal over time though and while this one tears a bit every time I think of her, I know she’s up there watching over me,” he said. 
“She is, she’s always been watching over you and she always will be.”
“I know,” he simpered, leaving a soft peck on your forehead. “What about you? Are you missing your life back in the city yet?” 
“Not a chance.” 
“What is this vendetta you hold against the city?” 
“The city is such a hypocrite. I never understood how so many souls could live in the same place and yet one person could still manage to feel so lonely,” you exhaled rather loudly, “life. . things were supposed to be different, you know?” 
“Different isn’t always bad.” 
“I suppose not.” 
“It’s not,” a slight smile sat on his lips. A brief silence fell between you two and then he asked the question you’d avoided giving any thought to since setting foot in town, “do your parents know you’re here?” 
“Not. . really?” 
“That sounded like a question.” 
“It kind of is.” 
A slight smile was displayed on his lips, “Are you here hiding from them?” 
“Kind of. .” you cackled, “it’s not really hiding if they don’t know I’m here to begin with right?” 
“So they don’t know you left the city?” 
“They know—I’m not in the city and taking a small break but they don’t know exactly where,” you say mushing all the words into one long word, not really wanting to decipher what you were saying, “they also don’t know I was fired. I think that’ll break their heart too much.” 
“Are you planning to tell them anytime soon?” 
“I was going to tell them. . once I make it back to the city and find a new job.” 
“Oh..okay.” 
His embrace grew tighter, he held you closer and you could feel his warmth wracking your nerves. It was like he didn’t want to let go.. not now. Not ever. And you didn’t want him to either, “but I’m not sure if that truly is the reality of what I want,” you sighed, “I was miserable in the city, the life I lived there was rigid. Besides, cooking is not what I intend to do for the rest of my life. I just. . I don’t know what to do.” 
“All of the roads leading to our destiny are paved the way they are for a reason,” Jin offered, “they mold us and guide us to the exact spot where we are supposed to be.”  
“You’re right.” 
“Also call your parents. You deserve to pursue what you want but they should also know,” he said. “Plus, I bet they’re worried sick.” 
“Again. . you’re right.” a low sough escaped your lips mimicking the swift draft blowing by in the late night. 
”I know I am,” he said smugly, “what would you even do without me?”
“You’re a cocky motherfucker you know.” 
“If by cocky motherfucker you mean multi-talented handsome Jin. Then, yes I do agree with that.” 
“Not what I meant,” you mumbled. 
“You know, you weren’t talking all this shit when we were in that cave a couple days ago.” 
“Yeah, I think that’s because my mouth was kind of a little busy.” 
“Right,” Jin drew in a deep breath, his fingers toyed with the straps of your dress, “you know I think we left something unfinished back in your apartment a couple of days ago.” 
“Yeah, it’s too bad that you had to go,” you turned around now lying on your side facing away from him, “because I wanted—I needed you to stay so bad.” 
“Needed, huh?” he asked, pressing closer against your back side. Lingers of sandalwood and citrus invaded your nostrils. An aromatic scent so rich and so addicting all you craved was to bury your nose to the base of his neck and grow faded off his fragrance. 
You closed your eyes, ensnared in the trance of his soft pants as he began grinding his crotch against your ass at an agonizing pace. 
His clothed dick marked you before you even had the chance to feel him inside you.
 It was torture. 
“Jin,” you moaned. 
“What’s wrong, doll?” he replied in a derisive tone while clicking his tongue. His hands reached lower and lower until they landed on your inner thighs, “am I close to where you want me?” 
You nodded frantically, “Higher.” 
His fingers delineated the goosebumps forming on your skin as he dawdled his journey to your soaked cunt. 
“Higher, Seokjin. Please,” your voice tainted with desire and desperation. 
“Tell me, is this where you want me?” His digits traced your folds spreading your wetness en route. Your dress now hiked up to your waist as Jin began rubbing small circles on your clit. Then, slowly he repeated, “Is this where you wanted me?” 
“Hm.” 
“You were anticipating this weren’t you?” Jin whispered, causing downpours of chills to trickle down your back, “is that why you wore no underwear?” 
His fingers continued working in-between your folds, “Uh, fuck yes!” You screamed out. 
There were approximately billions of stars in the Milky Way galaxy, a lot of which you were looking up to at that very moment. And yet as you laid there under the incantation of Seokjin’s finger you witnessed the birth of many stars flickering into life. 
Your chest heaved as you settled down from yet another astounding high. 
“Doll,” Seokjin swiped his fingers coated with your juices onto your lips, as if he was applying lip gloss on you. You opened your mouth taking his digits in licking them clean. “Holy fuck, you will be the death of me.” 
“Jin?” 
“Yeah?” 
“I need you.” 
He laid flat on his back patting his lap, “come on, baby girl.” 
You straddled him, your wet pulsating cunt rubbing against his clothed erection. There was a painful hunger rooting in between your legs—craving nothing but to have him buried deep in you. 
“Take it out,” he instructed. You unbuttoned his jeans and pulled them down along with his briefs just enough for his erection to spring free. 
Slowly, you began sinking down on his cock. Your mouth agape at the overwhelming feeling of him filling you up while your hands landed on his chest for balance. Once accustomed to his size you began to move up and down on his length as he disappeared deeper and deeper inside of you. 
Seokjin was full of pleasant surprises; his fingers, his mouth, his tongue so it was really no surprise his dick was equally as blessed. 
“Seokjin,” you whimpered. 
“Oh doll,” his hands gripped your waist, fingers digging into your skin likely to leave marks behind—guiding you to move at a quicker pace.  “Fuck!” 
“God, you feel so good.” 
The composition of your bodies moving against each other molded into the perfect whole. You were two, but while he fucked into you the way he was you felt as if he belonged inside your walls and you never ever wanted to feel empty again.  
“Doll, I’m so close,” his rough and raspy voice was a bass tune in your ears, “so fucking close.” 
“I want you to cum in me. Please, Jin,” you continued riding him, your skin slapping on his continuing your journey on his cock sliding up and down over and over until your walls began to clench around him. 
It wasn’t long before the two of you reached your peak and you collapsed on top of him, out of breath and too tired to do anything that required moving in any way. 
“Now tell me, is there any chance you’d stay even after the summer’s over.” 
“I’ve been thinking about it,” his skin was scolding even over the layer of his t-shirt, his chest and forehead glistening by a thin layer of sweat, “a lot actually.” 
“And what was the conclusion?” 
“I like it here,” you kissed his cheek, “I think I’ll be staying. . For now. Take some time to myself and explore things.” 
“I like it when you’re here.” 
“That reminds me,” you reached for your purse, “ I have a surprise for you.” 
You pulled out a piece of paper and handed it over to him. His eyes scanned the sketch, “Is this us?” 
“It’s us. . in the cave,” you giggled, “I tried to capture every moment.” 
“I especially like the one with my head between your legs,” a rosey shade painted his cheeks. 
“Had to portray my favorite moment from that day.” 
“We can always recreate it. To liven the memory, you know.” 
“Right now?” 
“Right now,” he disappeared lower in between your thighs, his head hiding under the fabric of your dress. 
Kind days were definitely in forecast especially if you had Seokjin right there by your side. 
-
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an: holy fuck this was a blast to write. as always if the smut is intolerable pls look away (although, that may be hard cause there are multiple smut scenes so. . uh, yeah).
for the seokjinnies who miss seokjin very dearly .
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ugh-yoongi · 9 months
Note
Hi Jewel. Congrats on the milestone! Can I request for a drabble for Seokjin with a brother’s best friend trope? Thank you
thank you so much! i am not well-versed in this trope, but i am the no. 1 trope inversion stan so i hope i did it justice and that you enjoy it nonetheless!
i'm still slowly working my way through my milestone drabbles btw! i didn't forget about them. :')
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got me all messed up
pairing: seokjin x f. reader genre: brother's best friend, fwb au; smut warnings: i have tagged this as smut but it's not super explicit/detailed. still: swearing, oral sex (m. receiving), reader is kind of a brat, seokjin is both flustered as hell and bossy, a little dirty talk, unedited. rating: explicit. minors do not interact. wordcount: 1.1k
“We shouldn’t be doing this.”
You roll your eyes, shimmying your shorts down and off. “You say that every time, Seokjin.”
He sputters, torn between the nonchalance in your response and the sight of you nearly bare, down to just your underwear and a flimsy tank top. “Yah, that’s because it’s true every time.”
Of all your brother’s friends, Seokjin is probably the worst one you could’ve picked for something like this for a multitude of reasons. First, he’s got a horrible laugh. It’s not the sexy kind of half-chuckle that some guys have—it’s honking and loud and mortifying when you’re in tight quarters. Second, he’s got something of a conscience. Something in the sense that he’s still going to meet up with you for sex, but he makes a whole thing out of it.
You’re his best friend’s sister. He’s taking advantage of you. Blah, blah, blah.
“It’s getting a little annoying, is what I’m saying.”
Seokjin’s got protests and excuses for days, but he always seems to shut up whenever you drop to your knees in front of him. And, to his credit, there is a lot of him, which almost cancels out all the talking he does about your brother, who is not a person you want to be thinking or talking about when you’ve got a very nice, very capable cock halfway down your throat.
“So-sorry—oh my god.”
Whatever you want to call it, the thing between you and Seokjin has been going on long enough that you know what he likes, know how he wants it. Know when he starts doing those breathy, staccato whines, rolling his hips, that you’re treading along a very dangerous path.
The temperature in your apartment can barely be considered habitable, and you know he’s not long for this world between the sight of your hardened nipples poking at the fabric of your top and the attention you’re lavishing on the head of his cock. So you pull back, jerk him slow, make a show of rolling your eyes again. “You know all that who does this pussy belong to shit is just dirty talk, right? My brother doesn’t own me.”
Another reason why Seokjin wasn’t really built for this: he’s so easy to embarrass. Flushes red, red, red at the mere mention of sex despite having had a lot of it. “I don’t—”
“I’m an entire adult, Seokjin.”
A high-pitched keen erupts from him when you sink back down his length and he nudges at the back of your throat. “I know.”
“I can fuck my brother’s friend if I want to.”
“I know.”
“My brother’s friend can fuck me, if he wants to.”
“Can you do that thing again—”
“Only if you shut up about my brother.” A pained noise. Something between a whine and an frustrated groan, because he doesn’t agree but tries to guide your mouth back to him anyway. “Seokjin.”
“I’m sorry,” he repeats, “it’s just…”
Entirely fed up, you pull away entirely. Seokjin looks stricken, a child whose favorite toy has been taken from him, and you ignore it long enough to find his jeans and retrieve his phone from the back pocket. “What are you—” he starts to ask, expression morphing into full-blown panic, and the line rings once, twice, before—
“Hey, hyung,” comes your brother’s voice.
Above you, Seokjin is flailing. Tries to grab the phone. Assumes some kind of prayer position. Whisper-yells please, please, please while you just stare. Looks like he wants to sink through the floor and die when you don’t budge. Moves on to bargaining: he’ll tell your brother himself, please just give him time. Two weeks at the most. No? How about a week? Come on, please, don’t do this. Three days? Fine—just hang up and he’ll call him back himself, tell him right now.
“Hyung? Hello?”
It’s honestly impressive how long you’re able to stonewall him, because Seokjin eventually sighs, sags against the wall in defeat. “Fine,” he acquiesces. Runs a hand through his hair and waves you off. “Go ahead, ruin my life.”
“Did you butt-dial me again?”
“No, it’s me.”
“Huh? Why do you have Seokjin-hyung’s phone?”
“Because we’re hooking up.”
There’s a scream from the other end of the line. Seokjin tries to disappear further into the wall. “What? Like, right now?”
You can spare him the embarrassment of this, at least. “No, in general. Just thought you should know.”
“I did not need to know that, thanks. Please never call me again.”
“Fine by me.”
You end the call, tossing Seokjin’s phone back towards his pants. And it’s not his expression that shocks you, stuck somewhere between relief and pure terror. It’s the fact that Seokjin, the mildly-reformed king of all things vanilla himself, is still rock hard.
“Are you still—”
“Don’t,” is all he says, flush nearly creeping to the middle of his chest. “You’re turning me into a freak.”
“Didn’t know being honest was some weird kink, but all right.”
“It wasn’t being honest,” he argues, “it was you being all authoritative and hot.”
You snort. Say, “I would barely consider that being authoritative, but we can definitely explore this now that I’ve cleared your conscience and you’re able to fuck me guilt-free,” even though it’s not a surprise that Seokjin is into that sort of thing—being ignored, almost purposely disobeyed. Knowing exactly what he wants and giving him the opposite.
You expect an agreement. Maybe a repeat of that time you’d gotten him so riled up he’d dragged you into the bathroom and fucked you against the sink, not a care in the world that your brother was fifty feet away. You expect blush-dusted cheeks and that aw shucks expression he loves to wear as he scratches at the back of his neck and agrees that yeah, he can fuck you guilt-free now.
But there’s none of that.
There’s still Seokjin slumped against the wall, breath heaving as he fists mindlessly at his cock. There’s you, still on your knees in front of him, spit lingering in the corners of your mouth, pooling on your tongue. For the first time, it’s awkward, and you wonder if you’ve overstepped. Made a mess of something Seokjin wanted to keep neat and tidy.
An apology is halfway out of your mouth when the atmosphere shifts. You feel it, and you know Seokjin knows you feel it because he quirks an eyebrow, barely taunting. Stands at full height, looks down at you like an inconvenience, like you’re another one of his unruly dongsaengs that he needs to wrangle into compliance.
You test it. A cheeky, “Can I help you?” that makes his jaw clench.
“You can.”
“Yeah? You got any suggestions, or have you not thought that far ahead?”
“Get on the bed,” he instructs, glaring, like he’s never had a sense of humor a day in his life.
You’re not the type to be easily wrangled, but this version of Seokjin is really working for you. Shy, bumbling Seokjin is nowhere to be found, and if this is what it means to turn him into a freak, you’ll gladly reap the benefits.
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KSJ - I’m home.
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It was safe to say that the last two years has been difficult, even though you had gotten to call and message it had almost felt as if you hadn’t seen the man you love for the entirety of the time he was completing his mandatory enlistment.
It had been at least nine months of phone calls and messages, no visits. However, that all ended today.
You had argued that you should go to pick him up with the other members but Namjoon had made a valid point that it would be best to be safe from the media, that’s how you ended up here, sitting on your couch, waiting.
You couldn’t help the anxiety and excitement bubbling up inside you, your foot tapping repetitively against the rug beneath your feet. Time dragged on and and on, you had been clock watching. It hit an hour, and then two, and then three before you heard the key code being punched in from the other side of the door.
As he pushed it open you wasn’t sure what to do, you wanted to run up and wrap your body around him, to kiss every inch of him and forbid him from every going anywhere ever again but you couldn’t.
You were sure the world had stop spinning.
“I’m home.” He mumbles dropping his bags by the door, sliding off his shoes.
“You’re home.” Your voice is nothing but a whisper.
You can feel the tears cascading down your face as he envelopes you into a hug. Crying wasn’t something you liked to do, you hated everything about crying but in this moment is was all you could do, your body collapsed against him as if it knew it could finally relax now he was back.
“Let’s go sit, okay baby?” He questions, placing a kiss to your ear.
You huff, pushing yourself further into him. “No, don’t wanna move.”
“I just got home, don’t be a brat.” He laughed poking your sides earning a yelp from you.
You both shuffled, very slowly, over to the plush couch, some part of your body still being entwined with one another. He sat first, pulling you into his lap.
“I missed you so much.” He mumbled against your head, pressing a kiss into your hair.
You shook your head, still sobbing lightly as you pushed yourself into his chest. You was afraid any moment you was going to wake up and find out this was a dream.
“Sweetheart I’m not going anywhere. Although if you don’t stop pulling my shirt I may need to go to the hospital for strangulation.” He laughs lights pulling your hands up to his face, ultimately making you look at him.
“I don’t ever want to be without you.” You breathe releasing him slightly.
He brushes a hair from your face before kissing you, his lips feeling familiar against your own. You lean in further as his tongue flicks against your mouth.
“I missed that so much.” You rested your forehead against his.
“Do you want to get something to eat?” He grins softly.
“Mhm, I can order if you want to go shower?” You kiss him once again, reluctantly lifting yourself from his lap.
“Getting rid of me already?” He laughs standing up.
“If you want me to hold you hostage I will.” You swat his leg as he passes you.
The light sounds of the shower bring you comfort, you and seokjin didn’t have a huge home, sure it was on the bigger side but it wasn’t a mansion however, it felt that way whenever he wasn’t here. The space seemed to swallow you most days.
When he had talked to you about enlisting you promised him you wouldn’t stop doing anything, he wanted to know you would continue living, continue doing what makes you happy. He didn’t want you to spend the entirety of the time crying at home or simply giving up. You agreed instantly, you’d give him whatever he wanted or needed to keep himself strong during this time. You hadn’t anticipated the house to feel so lonely, you hadn’t thought about the lonely nights you’d spend curled up in a ball in bed despite the fact no one would be joining you. In the first two weeks you’d set up dinner spaces for two people at least 6 times before remembering you would be eating your meals alone. Despite that you didn’t stop living, you wanted to make sure that he didn’t have to worry about anything when he came home so you kept yourself together. So what if at least three times a week you cried for an hour or so, he wouldn’t know.
“What are you thinking about.” His voice was raspy, sultry.
You almost jumped out of your skin at the surprise. “Just happy to have you home.”
“So tell me all the things I missed.” He rounds the table, taking a seat beside you.
You pull yourself into him again, not wanting to have any distance between you. “You didn’t, it was exactly the same except once a week one of the members would come over and eat dinner with me, although I feel like you were probably the reason for that.”
“I worried about you.” He sighed.
“I worried about you too. How was it? Honestly.” You looked up to him, searching his face for any discomfort on the topic.
“It wasn’t as bad as I thought but it wouldn’t be something I’d ever want to go through again. I hope I provided the others some courage on it though.” He nudged your face with his nose making you smile.
He always had the ability to make a stressful situation seem good.
“Do you want to shower before dinner?” He rubs his hands up and down your thighs, squeezing them sporadically.
You shake your head vehemently. “No, although you could have let me shower with you.”
“Don’t pout sweetheart, go shower and by the time you’re finished our food will be here.
“Do I have to?” You bat your eyelashes at him.
He laughs lifting you from his lap. “No you don’t, I could make your ass red right now but I’d much rather you be a good girl. Go shower, take your time baby. I’m not going anywhere.”
You can’t help the way your cheeks flush a dark crimson at his tone, his aura shifting. “Fine but you better have the food waiting when I finish because I may die of starvation.”
“Didn’t have daddy to cook for you huh?” He chuckles.
You groan throwing your head back as you walk towards the bathroom. “Don’t call yourself that.”
“What, daddy? Am I not daddy enough?” He laughs even louder to which you slam the bathroom door.
You try not to rush your shower but it’s something you do compellingly, your body moving without any thoughts but “I want to be beside him again.”
By the time you finish and get dressed true to his word the food is set out across the living room table, you rarely ate anywhere but the dining room so you knew this was just as an intimate day for him as it was you.
“You look so good. God I missed waking up to you.” He reaches a hand out to you pulling you next to him, handing you a dinner tray.
You wave your hand at him picking up your cutlery. “Don’t make me cry, if we talk about how we missed one another the tears would start and I would not be able to stop them.”
“Was it hard?” He asks, taking a bite into his steak.
“The first day was surprisingly easy, once the members returned we went to eat, I’ve never had a dinner with them be so silent. Jungkook drove me home that night and he cried for a while, he offered to stay and I’m pretty sure he did that for him more than me but I told him I was fine. I didn’t cry, I don’t think I cried until the third week. I had a shitty day at work and I came home ready to unload it on you over some cheap ramen that I had stocked but I walked in and the loneliness just hit me. I lived in your clothing, I rarely wore anything of my own. I remember the first time we got to face time, I had been waiting all day and the connection was awful but seeing you even for a few minuets made the next month so easy. I wouldn’t have been able to get through it without the other members.” You brushed away a few tears you hadn’t noticed forming, taking a bite from your meal to distract yourself.
“Im never going anywhere without you ever again.” He brushed a hand through your hair before returning to his meal.
The rest of the dinner was filled with random bits of information and events that you had both been unable to witness. It was filled with a soft laughter, tender smiles and suggestive touches. The food itself was awful, the steak was hard and dry, the potatoes were cold and it was overpriced but you didn’t care. The food was the least of your worries.
You took both yours and his plates to the kitchen, rinsing them off with a promise to clean everything later.
When you return the room isn’t how you’d left it, Jin had set up a series of candles across the room, the tv had been lowered, and the said man was waiting across the room on one knee.
“Oh.” Was all you could manage as you shuffled towards him, your hands shaking.
“I waited two years to ask you this, I wanted to do it properly, to set up something big, something deserving of you but I couldn’t wait. You were one of the only thoughts that helped me through the rough days, your voice and the letters you would have Namjoon write me to be discreet were my most cherished memories. You made me a promise before I left and you stuck to it, no matter how hard it was you stuck by me and you kept going. I am so proud of you, I’m so thankful that I get to call you mine. It’s something I would like the honour of doing for the rest of my life, from the moment I met you I couldn’t stop thinking about you, I remember messing up so many recordings because you had occupied my mind for far too long. I have had the pleasure to experience things other people could only dream of but being with you is one of my greatest accomplishments, I hope I can be someone worthy of your love for the rest of my life if you’ll give me that chance. So with that being said, will you marry me?”
You couldn’t move, couldn’t speak, couldn’t blink. You were frozen, your heart beating so hard you were sure it could be heard across the country. After a few seconds he shuffled awkwardly, you could see he was worrying so you did all you could. You slammed your body into his wrapping your arms around him as you kissed him desperately. Your soft moans and his grunts the only sound in the room, you laugh as he bites your lip.
“Smell.” He moans out after a few seconds.
You pause pulling back. “What?”
“I smell fire.”
You both turn to the couch only to see the bottom end half alight, the candle set on the table had been knocked over. You scrambled off jin to grab the fire extinguisher as he rushed to help you spray it he caught his leg on the tv swiftly bringing it to the ground with a hard crash.
A series of explicit words weee thrown around with you both screaming and shouting at one another to be careful.
After a ten minuet fuss, a burnt couch and a broken tv you both were sitting in the kitchen, him in-between your legs as you rested against the counter.
“That was some proposal.” You breathe out, massaging his scalp with your nails.
“That didn’t go how I expected, you didn’t exactly answer either.” He mumbled pulling you closer by your waist.
“It’s a million times yes jinnie, I thought my kissing was an indication of that.”
“It was not.” He rolls his eyes dramatically, pulling the box from his sweatpants. “Can I put it on?”
“Please.” You nod, holding out your hand.
He slides the ring onto your finger, it was beautiful. A singular Jem on the middle with the words “a forever gift.” Engraved on the silver band.
You feel the tears pooling in your eyes but you don’t care and by the puffiness of his face neither does he. You hold each other for so long that you lose count of the time. Eventually he picks you up from the counter helping you get into bed.
You wanted to protest and tell him you could stay awake longer but he shushed you instantly so you slumped back onto the bed, secure with his arms around you. So what if the food sucked, the couch set alight and the TV smashed into a thousand pieces. Your fiancé was finally home, everything else could go to shit and it would be okay because seokjin was back.
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jinkookspencil · 1 month
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i got you | ksj
back from his service, jin tests out his strength and a theory of his
tags/note: jin x chubby / plus size / curvy reader (f) / fluff + suggestive / established relationship (they're engaged!) / low-key seokjin has soft-dom loving energy here but it doesn't get that steamy
wc: ~1.3k words
description/note: just domestic fluff in the kitchen / spoiler alert for jin's theory: he's sure he can carry his fiance and wants to try it out / no mentions of insecurity on yn's part, she just doubts jin can actually do it / intended with a plus sized woman in mind, but i think you can read and relate even if that doesn't apply to you? as long as you have any doubts that jin can carry you lol / no mentions of idol life, this jin can be whatever you want him to be / they're in the kitchen and jin had been cooking but no other mention of food / i actually wrote a jk version of this first but i will post that second - very soon, it's basically done! i have such a thing for fics based around jin's return i miss him yall / i shared an update post recently detailing where i've been and how i'll be with this blog moving forward! /also, happy valentine's day, here's a lil love from me and jin to my fellow chubby/curvy/plus-sized beauties!! <3 again, jk version coming very sooooooon! / update: jk version available to read here!
The clang of pots and pangs echoing through your apartment warmed your heart. It was an irritating sound when heard regularly, of course, but considering how long it’s been since you’d had your fiance messing about in the kitchen… it was more than welcome. Following the noise, you find Seokjin with his back turned to you, cleaning his used kitchenware and cutlery in the sink and quietly humming a tune. You cursed yourself for not peeking in earlier just to see the man in action - it always was a turn-on seeing Seokjin’s dedicated, sweaty, albeit chaotic cooking. This still did something, though. Hopping onto the freshly cleaned marble-topped kitchen island, you take it all in: the faint smell of something delicious in the oven, the sound of the gushing tap water, more clangs of metal on metal, but you really focus on the man that stood before you. Your man. His adorable growing hair was too short to be long, too awkward to be short. His broad shoulders and new muscles now pressed through his tee instead of his bones. His silver singing voice, even as a gentle whisper, which you hadn’t realized abruptly stopped.
“Drink it in. I’m enjoying this just as much as you are.”
You wonder what gave it away. The sound of your footsteps, the ruffle of your pajama fabric, or perhaps an admiring sigh you hadn’t noticed escaped you. It didn’t matter. You were enjoying the view, surely, but it was even better now when he turned to face you, a shy smile on his face.
“Missed cooking that much?”
“Cooking, yes, I missed being in the kitchen. I don't need to tell you how much I fucking missed your bratty ass, but what I meant was that I am enjoying you. I’m elated I finally have my girl and soon-to-be wife ogling me instead of the men at the base.” He chuckles, turning away and hiding a sudden shyness while drying his hands with a kitchen towel.
“And I'm elated just to be with her... Now that that’s done…” he whispers, undoubtedly ready for what you were with his hands and eyes on your plush thighs, his fingertips toying with the hem of your pajama shorts.
“It’s like you read my mind,” you smile, wrapping your arms around his neck, trying to pull him in for a kiss, only for him to pull away.
That was a first. Since Seokjin was back, at least. The two of you barely kept your hands off of one another….
“Or not…” you ask curiously, cupping his face in your hands. “Seokjin?”
Your fiance silently continues tracing the skin of your plush thighs, squeezing the flesh in his hands. He exhales before doing it once again and finally looking up at you.
You jump from the counter and face him, trying to look into his eyes, but he’s lost in thought. You pull his hand to lead him to the bedroom, but he doesn’t budge.
“Seokjin…?” you ask once again.
“Jump back on the counter for me, love.”
You do.
“Wrap your legs around me, honey.”
“Well, I was going to anyways,” you say, following his orders. “In there…”
“I’ll take you there.”
“What? No!” you shriek, unwrapping your legs from his body.
“Yes, come on, honey,” he says, his voice steady yet soft as he reaches for your leg.
“Seokjin, you cannot carry me,” you say, now pushing him away while he tries to tug you closer.
“Yes, I can,” he insists with a sternness to his voice that reminds you where he’d spent the past 18 months.
“Just because you’re all buff now doesn’t mean you can carry me, stupid. I’m still big, you know?”
“Well, guess who’s also big now? I mean, I always was, of course,” he says with a giggle and a flushed face as he raises his brow and tilts his head downwards, reminding you that he’s still your Seokjin. You promptly roll your eyes with a smile, pinching his arm. He regains his composure in mere seconds, a hand brushing your hair and tilting your face up towards his.
“I will admit that I probably wouldn’t have been able to do it before enlisting, but… I can now, honey. I can.”
“I don’t want you to,” you pout, unable to meet his gaze no matter how intense you knew it was, so knew it was best to shut it down as quickly as possible. Seokjin never forced you to do something you didn’t want to do…
“You.. why not?”
“Because in the case that you try to carry me but then realize you cannot, we could drop to the floor and one or both of us will get hurt. You could get hurt physically since I have padding and you don’t. I’d get hurt mentally, and I’ll be so fucking embarrassed that it was because of my weight.”
“The number of things wrong with that…,” Seokjin tsks, cupping your face and forcing you to look him in the eye. “First of all, I can carry you. Second, muscles are a form of padding, too, idiot.” He pokes your forehead and puts your hand on his shoulders to feel how strong he’d gotten while he takes your soft thigh in his hand. “I can take it, sweetie - all this tells me is I haven’t told you just how much work I did in the service. Third, it’s not because of your weight - nothing ever was. It’d be because I wasn’t strong enough.”
“Seokjin… I don’t know.”
“And you have nothing to be embarrassed about, my love. Ever. I mean… it’s me. I’ve seen and touched you in the most ungodly ways possible, and this would be what would embarrass you? Falling? When I-?”
You shake your head and interrupt him with shushes - nothing he could’ve said would have helped his case. “Can’t we at least put a mattress down or something? In case we fall?”
“Babe, this isn’t Jungkook’s apartment. We don't have an excess of mattresses here…”
The comment makes you giggle.
The way Seokjin rubbed your skin calmed your racing mind.
The kiss he plants on your lips reminds you that this is home.
This is safety.
This is love.
“Just trust me,” he whispers.
You nod, allowing Seokjin to wrap one of your legs around his torso and then the other. His hands sneak their way between your thighs and the marble countertop, digging into your plush skin already. You’d expected Jin to start a countdown, ease you into it at least… but before you knew it, his head was nestled in your chest, and you were off the counter, held up high in his arms.
A loud shriek escapes you, making your fiancee giggle beneath you.
“See, love? I got you...”
He was holding onto you securely, with no sign of any struggle on his part…. If he had been struggling with the weight of you, he hid it well…
“The view’s nice up here,” you smile, resting your head atop Seokjin’s when he finally looks away from you and buries his face in your flesh, kissing and biting you there.
“Seokjin, I can’t smell your shampoo anymore. When was the last time you showered?”
“Mm,” he says against your skin. “Fuck, that’s… that’s a perfect idea, honey,” he says, wide-eyed and excited, though he misunderstands. “It’ll be like a movie scene. But first…”
Seokjin dashes towards the bedroom with you still in his arms, shrieking until he plops you down onto your shared mattress.
“Safe?” he teases, pretending to check your body for any bruises before you pull him towards you until he’s leaning over you, his face a centimeter away from yours, with his hands already all over your soft body.
“Safe,” you say happily.
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daechwitatamic · 10 months
Text
Amalthea || KSJ || Masterpost
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(banner by @itaeewon)
Title: Amalthea
Status: Complete - all parts posted!
WC: 40k
Rating: NSFW - minors dni
Genre: best friend's older brother!au, angst smut fluff trifecta
Summary: You can count on two things in life. One: that your lifelong best friend Minji will always be there for you, in your corner, your brightest star. Two: that you'll never be free from her older brother Seokjin's orbit - the gravitational pull is just too strong.
Warnings:  language, drinking, angst, time jumps, pov changes, this whole thing could’ve been 10k if i were mentally well, way too many deeply pretentious space references, kissing, explicit sex (chapters will have individual warnings), Jin calls reader “Beautiful” as a pet name but only like twice, Jinkook as actual brothers bc fuck biology!
Author's Note: thank you to @yoongiphoria @here2bbtstrash and @kookstempo for beta-ing. MJ you especially answered six THOUSAND questions about this as I worked and I THANK YOU 😭🥰
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Series teaser:
There have been many times through your life where you felt like you were clutching Minji’s hand through the fire. 
You still remember clearly the way she’d bounded up to your locker, back when you were thirteen, squealing and excited because the most popular girl in your year had invited her over. 
You still remember her sobbing on your bed weeks later when it came to light that the girl - who wouldn’t be the last to try - was just trying to get an “in” with Minji’s hot, older brother.
“You know I would never, right?” you’d promised her. Stupid, at fourteen, not clarifying that you meant never use you to get to him. Stupid, because then you were sixteen and then eighteen and then twenty-one and then twenty-six and you weren’t sure what you had actually promised - had Minji heard it as I would never get involved with him? 
“I know,” she’d sobbed, reaching one hand blindly to clutch at yours. “I know you wouldn’t.”
And now you’re twenty-eight and the secrets you’ve kept keep piling up - each day you love him, another pebble atop the pile.
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1. Asterism || WC: 9.5k
A prominent star pattern that is not a full constellation
2. Retrograde || WC: 9.5k
When a celestial object moves "backwards" or reverse of "normal" motion
3. Libration || WC: 14k
A slight tilting of the Moon over time that brings parts of the Moon that are normally obscured into view
4. Perilune || WC: 8k
The point of an elliptical lunar orbit where the satellite and the Moon are the closest
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