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buckysimp101 · 2 years

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Love at First Grade (18+) - 5

Single Dad!Bucky Barnes x Single Mom!Reader; Teacher!Bucky x CEO!Reader

chapter warning: nothing, the kids are cute af (cause that’s a warning tbh)

a/n: the next chapter??????????? i’m so excited. this chapter???????? i love. so much.

Series Masterlist

Bucky had forgotten just how long the first week of school felt. It always seemed to drag on with no visible end in sight. Becca was better behaved during the week, probably because Ethan ignored her and Avery every time the two girls got together on the playground.

The two girls had a bond that Bucky liked to think was a strong as his and Steve’s, especially since both friendships started in eerily similar ways. From what Bucky could tell, Avery seemed to be benefitting from Becca’s friendship. Every day she came back from the playground that week she was a little more talkative, a little less shy with her classmates, and a little more willing to participate in classroom activities.

Avery had an equally substantial impact on Becca. Every day after school it was all Bucky heard. Even if he didn’t have car duty, Becca was begging to wait with Avery until she was picked up to spend as much time as possible with her. The two would giggle and chat until someone came to pick Avery up. For most of the week it was you, and Bucky savored every interaction he had with you. Each day you dropped her off in a different pantsuit or dress and Bucky swore that it was impossible for you to get more attractive. But then you’d stoop down and swipe Avery into the biggest hug or you’d merely look at her with all the love you could muster for her playing on your face. It made Bucky find you even MORE attractive.

But yesterday, a young man had dropped Avery off, Avery referred to him as Uncle Sam when he walked her to her classroom door. You had sent a note with Sam and Avery to Bucky apologizing that you wouldn’t be there due to work to drop her off or pick Avery up on Thursday but that someone named Wanda would be picking her up in your place. When a young woman with auburn hair and a slight accent arrived Avery practically screamed “AUNTIE WANDA” as she ran full speed at the red head. Of course Becca followed and made sure that she introduced herself to her new best friend’s Aunt. Avery had whispered something in Wanda’s ear, and it must have had something to do with him or Becca because the young woman looked at him with a pleased smirk on her face and whispered her response to the mystery statement in Avery’s ear. Avery’s eyes brightened before she was nodding her head animatedly. Avery gave Becca a hug before taking her Aunt Wanda’s hand and waving bye to Bucky.

At dinner that night, Becca was telling Bucky all about her week while she ate her spaghetti. Some of what she had to say included what she was learning in Steve’s class. But most of her conversation revolved around Avery. How Avery’s favorite color was pink and that was similar to Becca’s favorite color, purple. How Avery loved unicorns and Becca loved unicorns. How they both loved Bluey and their grandparents. But the one comment Becca made that showed Bucky how caring and loving his daughter was? Becca informed Bucky that Avery’s dad wasn’t around, the exact conversation went a little like this:

“Daddy, did you know that Avery doesn’t have a daddy? Like I don’t have a mommy. But she has a mommy, and I have a daddy. And you both love us very much. And we’re best friends. If I share you with Avery, do you think I can share Avery’s mommy?”

Becca rarely asked about Dot and in return Bucky barely spoke about her. In Bucky’s mind, if Dot wanted nothing to do with Bucky then he’d make sure Becca had nothing to do with her. However, when she would ask questions about her, he’d answer them as honestly as he could, but she was six. How was he supposed to tell a six year old “hey your mom ran out on us because she didn’t want to get married, thought she’d made a mistake and didn’t want to be a mom?” Not that Bucky had forced the idea of marriage onto Dot, Bucky thought it had more to do with the fact that she liked the idea of being pregnant…but not necessarily the idea of being a mom. But he’d never know. For all he cared, Dot could stay away. He’d raised Becca by himself, with help from his ma, sister, Steve and Nat, and it was going perfectly fine. So the conclusion Becca had come up with on her own was that she didn’t have a mom. So the fact that she had recognized that Avery had a mom but no dad, and Becca had a dad but no mom, almost brought Bucky to tears.

“I think you’d have to talk to Avery and her mom about that kiddo. That’s a big question that requires a loooot of talking and a looot of thinkin,” Bucky answered his daughter’s question that had given him pause. Apparently that was the only answer she needed because she just nodded her head and went back to eating her spaghetti and talking about how she and Avery were going to play tag at recess tomorrow.

Finally the first week of the new school year had ended. Sam dropped Avery off at school again and either Bucky didn’t have as good of a poker face as he thought he did or Sam knew some information that Bucky didn’t because as the man left he called over his shoulder, “she’ll be here to pick Avery up this afternoon,” not even needing to clarify who “she” was. Bucky swore his heart picked up and he was light on his feet. Until the end of the day.

Becca was going to be picked up by Bucky’s mom today, she’d be spending the night with Winnifred so that Bucky could go out with Steve to Nat’s bar. They always celebrated the end of the first week of school and the last day of school with drinks at Nat’s, on the house of course. There was no way the two of them could afford to get drunk at Nat’s bar any other time, especially not on their teacher salaries. As Bucky waited for the kids to get picked up he noticed Avery and Becca giggling more than usual, he was about to ask what was so funny when he noticed the telltale look on Avery’s face. Her eyes grew to the size of sand dollars and the biggest grin took place as Bucky braced himself for,

“MOMMY!!!!!”

“Hi my sweet girl! Did you have the best day ever?” You asked enthusiastically and even though Bucky hadn’t seen you sine Wednesday he wondered if it were possible for you to look even better? You were wearing a blazer and fitted pants combination with heels that did everything for your figure. Soon you were tackled by Becca as well and you were giving her a big hug and asking, “how are you today Ms. Becca Barnes? Did you have the best day in the whole wide world?”

Even though Bucky had seen you interact with the girls like this a few times earlier in the week, every time it just confused him. You never seemed to fit the reputation that you appeared in the news to embrace. When you were around Avery you were a doting mother who would do anything for their child, such as…

“So, Mr. Barnes. It appears we have two little giggle monsters,” you stated in mock-seriousness, making sure to look pointedly at the girls who, to your point, giggled at the situation, “who have been trying to drum up the nerves to ask if they can have a playdate at the Central Park zoo tomorrow. I’m willing to make a deal.”

Bucky raised his eyebrow at your tone, he could tell you were trying to make it as serious as possible but when he looked in your eyes he could practically see the amusement dancing in them. Bucky chanced a look at Becca, he recognized that grin. That was the look she gave his ma whenever she wanted something. It always worked and she knew it.

“Well, Ms. L/N, that is a deal that could be arranged. As long as Giggle Monster Barnes behaves for Nana tonight,” he stated, looking at Becca for a response, she just nodded her head ferociously.

Your lips curled up into a grin, “well if Giggle Monster L/N behaves for Grammie and Grumps then you’ve got yourself a deal, Mr. Barnes. Central Park Zoo, Fifth Avenue entrance, eleven o’clock to try and beat the heat?” you questioned, holding your hand out for him to shake on it. Bucky could have sworn he heard a slight teasing tone in your voice but let that thought slip away as he shook on the deal. The girls squealed and hugged each other before running to their respective parents and yelling “thankyouthankyouthankyouthankyou!” Then, to both of your surprise, they ran to the opposite adult and gave them the same treatment. All Bucky could do was laugh. You gathered Avery’s stuff and told her to say goodbye to Becca before waving at the two members of the Barnes family. As much as Bucky hated seeing you go…he really enjoyed watching you leave. Alright, Lil Wayne. You’re not gonna make her bed rock, chill out, Bucky thought to himself, shaking his head as he looked at Becca who seemed seconds away from bursting with excitement. Luckily, that excitement was channeled into the form of a burst of energy as the six year old ran down the sidewalk to attack an older woman with the same dark hair and blue eyes.

“NANA! YOU’RE HERE! I HAVE TO TELL YOU ALL ABOUT MY NEW FRIEND AVERY CLAIRE L/N BUT SHE JUST GOES BY AVERY THANK YOU VERY MUCH!” Becca practically screamed at Bucky’s mother. Winnie just laughed at her granddaughter’s excitement as they approached Bucky.

“Hi, ma,” Bucky said with a grin as she pulled him in for a hug, giving him a kiss on the cheek. She must have left a lipstick print there because Becca was taken over with giggles again.

“Maaaaa,” Bucky groaned as he moved to wipe his face, Winnie just laughed in response.

“Oh don’t wipe away my sugar, honey. How else am I supposed to make sure everyone knows your mother has visited,” she teased as she bent down to pick up Becca into the hug she really wanted.

“Now, my sweet Becca Bug. I have a surprise guest that will be visiting us tonight…do you know who it might be?” Winnie asked with a gleam in her eye.

“IS IT AUNT BEX NANA!?!” Becca squealed as Winnie nodded her head, Bucky just groaned. His sister was in graduate school in Pennsylvania, but she tried to come up and visit as much as she could. Especially since she had her little namesake to visit in the city. Whenever Bucky would send Becca to a weekend with Nana and Becca-squared, he knew she’d be spoiled to no end. Becca was already talking a mile a minute about what she had done at school that week, about the games she had played with Avery, but before Bucky could let the conversation go any further he interrupted.

“Alright, Becca. Remember you have to be on your best behavior for Nana and Aunt Bee tonight or what…” Bucky lightly threatened.

Becca stood straight up and recited, “I have to be on my bestest-estest behavior for Nana tonight so that I can go to the zoo with my new best friend Avery tomorrow! Cause daddy said so!”

Bucky and Winnie laughed at Becca’s dramatics and Bucky nodded to show that Becca was correct. “I think we can manage to be as good as possible tonight so that you can have fun with your friend tomorrow. Now, go give your daddy the biggest hug ever so that we can go meet Aunt Bex at home!” Winnie exclaimed as she ran her hand through Becca’s curls, a fond look on her face. Becca nodded her head and did a running leap into Bucky’s awaiting grasp.

“I love you to the moon and back a zillion times, daddy!” She squealed as Bucky held her tight and responded, “I love you to infinity and beyond, sweetheart!”

Bucky let Becca down and she scrambled over to his mom and they began to walk towards her car. Becca and Avery were the last ones to be picked up so Bucky went inside to pack up the rest of his things to go home. Around eleven, Steve texted Bucky that he was in an Uber outside and the pair headed to Nat’s bar, Obsidian.

How Natasha Romanoff had come to own one of the fanciest bars in the city Bucky would never know. She always joked that she had ties to the Russian mafia and Bucky would laugh it off, but honestly he was too scared to question it. Obsidian’s usual clientele included Manhattan’s elite, but every so often Nat would invite Bucky and Steve for their free drinks. The trio had met in college and Steve and Nat had even dated at one point until they realized they were better off as friends. Ever since Bucky and Steve had started teaching and Nat had opened Obsidian, they had their traditions.

“Well look what the spider caught, is that Bucky Barnes and Steve Rogers?” A sultry voice called from behind the bar as Bucky and Steve made their way into the dark bar. Natasha’s red hair gleamed in the dim lighting as she fixed the two of them with a wicked grin. “What can I get you to drink, oh mighty educators of our future?”

Bucky rolled his eyes and groaned as Steve laughed at Nat’s words. She had picked on them mercilessly in college because of Steve’s answer to her question “what do you wanna do after school?” He had said “I want to educate our future!” The answer honestly made Bucky cringe a little but now it was one of their inside jokes.

“Whiskey neat, please Nat,” Bucky answered her question as she nodded her head at his usual, Steve responded in kind and Natasha busied herself with their order. When she turned around and placed their drinks of front of them she asked, “so how’s the school year so far, boys? Any hot moms, or grandma’s I don’t judge, catch your attention?”

Bucky’s mind immediately flitted to you. He had only managed to somewhat come to terms with the fact that he definitely had a crush on you in the car ride over with Steve. For some reason, Steve thought he was the expert on the subject and the perfect person to answer Nat’s query.

“Well Romanoff, buckle in cause our boy here is smitten as a kitten, in love as a dove, his name is Bucky and it rhymes with fucky…”

“Alright that’s enough! She gets it!” Bucky hurried to try and shut Steve up before he embarrassed Bucky even more.

Nat’s eyebrow raised at Bucky’s sudden interruption before she turned her attention to Steve, “no please continue Rogers, I wish to hear more about this MILF that might help Buckaroo here break his unwilling era of celibacy,” an evil grin twisting on her lips.

All Bucky could do was groan and focus more on his drink as Steve opened his mouth to talk, but thankfully Natasha interrupted him. “Speaking of, I’ll be right back boys. My big time tipper and all time favorite MILF just walked in the door. And since you’re not paying, onto the back burner you go.”

Bucky could tell Steve was ready to complain by the huff of annoyance he let out, something caught Steve’s attention. Next thing Bucky knew, Steve’s mouth dropped as he blindly moved his hand to try and slap Bucky’s arm, causing Bucky’s whiskey to slosh over his hand.

“What is it, ma-,” Bucky stopped mid-sentence as he tracked Steve’s eyes which had landed on Natasha. Because there, across the bar, dressed in leather pants and a lacy tank top, talking to Nat as if they had known each other an entire lifetime; surrounded by Tony fucking Stark, Pepper Potts-Stark, Wanda, Sam, was the MILF in question.

You.

taglist: (to be added just let me know in the comments or dm!)

@youlightmeupfinn

@la-undercover-latina

@jackiehollanderr

@fab-notfat

@galaxy-dusk

@asoftie4bucky

@fangirlvoice

@queenbeecandi

@babyevansblog

@stevihj

#james bucky barnes #bucky barnes x reader #bucky barnes x yn #single dad bucky x single mom reader #teacher!bucky x ceo!reader #teacher bucky barnes #bucky barnes smut #bucky barnes fanfiction #BuckySimp101

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fandomfluffandfuck · 6 months

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https://www.tumblr.com/fandomfluffandfuck/732381591802888192/speak-chapter-3-has-my-entire-god-damn-fucking?source=share

back after reading chapter 4, and oh my god. i actually read it yesterday itself but I was so emotionally fragile after reading it I couldn't bring myself to put anything into words. Still can't tbh. just know that my pillow has a giant tear stain.

I'm not American, so I didn't get to know about the AIDS crisis for a long time, because people talk about it even less over here than America. And firstly even i was like Bucky, knew the facts, was pretty oblivious to the people.

I read this book though, maybe you might like it as well - All The Young Men by Ruth Coker Burks. It's about the author being a single mom in the midst of the AIDS crisis in her southern town. She starts out by helping one dying man in a hospital where no one would care for him, and then as she helps more and more men she forges more relationships with the men and writes about what happened to them.

I cried when I first read it because it brought all of that right in front of my eyes. And yesterday was something like that again.

https://www.tumblr.com/fandomfluffandfuck/732383639349919744/lmao-perhaps-personally-for-unrelated-oral?source=share

Thank you for all the advice!!! And yep i think even if I read a lot of smutty stuff I have those internal biases at the back of my mind.

like how when I first read fics I used to find replace all mentions of dick with some euphemism because I was so scared to read it lmao. even now, when I read daddy I have an instinct to just laugh, then I reign myself in and bonk it into my head that it's not funny.

I do think it's part inexperience as well (never had sex, and don't want to in the future as well) so all my sex emotions knowledge is from fanfics. which might make my writing very saturated fanfic-ish but I'll roll with it to atleast get the ball rolling on writing.

if I manage to write anything (probably just couple of paragraphs) soon I'll send!

Hope you have an awesome day! 🤍

— 🔪 anon

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Aw, well, thank you so much for saying some words. Just reading is incredible, but hearing from people what they think will always be so incredibly special <3, especially with more emotional chapters like the latest update!

Oh, yeah, I can't imagine how little people learn about it from outside the US, which sort of makes sense. It was a US based event at first, but AIDs affects everywhere, so... yeah.

Oooh, I haven't read that book, but it sounds really interesting in a oh-that-will-certaintly-break-my-heart way. Thank you for the recommendation!

My apologies for making you cry <3

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Of course! I'm glad you got something out of my waffling, lmao.

Lmao, I love that. I feel like so many people begin there. And, hey, some people still are there with Daddy kink. Which, yeah, fair. It can be funny.

Ah, yeah, I could see that affecting your writing as well. I will say, though, many of the ace people I've meant are actually the filthiest fucking people, lmao. Perfect. I love it. Hey, if your fanfiction is fanfic-ish, then it just blends in well, lol 😘

That sounds great! I'd be happy to read anything you write! Happy writing!

#asks #🔪 anon #I'm imagining you writing a lot of consumption-esque smut 😏#fanfiction #writing #aids crisis

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nequittezpaswrites · 2 years

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Fanfiction & Meta Masterpost

Fanfiction:

Encanto:

Souls Aspiring: Paola Delgado offers to show Bruno the way out of the Encanto. He doesn't take her up on it, but somehow they wind up as penpals anyway. Bruno x OC, In Progress

Twilight:

Inter Vivos: A woman's search for her missing sister leads her to Volterra. Eventual Marcus x OC, In Progress

Pirates of the Caribbean:

Vexation: Will Turner did not get crazy good with a sword by practicing all by his lonesome. Mary Brown gets roped into his nonsense and discovers she rather prefers being a pirate to being a drunk blacksmith’s daughter. Barbossa x OC, In Progress

Supernatural:

Dynamics of an Asteroid: Adam wasn’t the only accident; John Winchester’s only daughter offers Sam shelter when Dean is assumed dead after killing Dick Roman, and then everyone learns what happens to those who assume. Eventual Balthazar x OC if the characters behave. In Progress (erratic updates)

Complex: Sam Winchester botches a summoning ritual and reverse French Mistakes a gal. Sam x OC fix-it fic, 170k, complete

Rewrite: A fan falls into the Supernatural universe, hightails it away from the Winchesters, and attempts to undo everything after Season 5 with the help of Metatron. Yes, Metatron. Metatron x OC, 44k, complete

Never Learn: God dumps Lucifer with a babysitter before he runs off to reconnect with his sister. Mary Poppins decides God can shove it and shacks up with the devil in a cabin in the woods. Lucifer x OC, 24k, complete

Dead Body Moving: Sam accidentally turns a cancer patient into a vampire, who proceeds to drink Crowley’s blood and become the Winchesters’ Mom Friend. Crowley x OC, 130k, complete

No Heaven or Hell: Angsty alternate ending to Dead Body Moving featuring Benny Lafitte. 7k, complete

Trivia: The Goddess of the crossroads ponders the upstart little stain who’s declared himself King. Crowley x Goddess, 2k, complete

Cookie For Your Soul: semi-autobiographical bisexual threesome Crowley smut. Crowley x OC, 5k, complete

Of Use: Rowena has a fling with a white witch, who thought she had no illusions and is ultimately proven wrong. Rowena x OC, 2k, complete

Sherlock:

Madness: Moriarty met another Doctor Watson during his time at Barts. Sherlock is convinced this is very important. Jim thinks this is fucking hilarious. Moriarty x OC, 56k, complete

Yu Yu Hakusho:

Nana: When Dr. Ichigaki can’t get his hands on Yusuke Urameshi, he decides the boy’s cousin is the next best thing. Ren Nakano has a Bad Time. Kurama x OC, 100k, On Hiatus

Marvel Cinematic Universe:

Learning to Fall: A risk-averse ex-SHIELD agent gets roped into swing dancing with the Winter Soldier, which she finds marginally preferable to Natasha Romanoff trying to push her down a flight of stairs. Bucky x OC, 10k, On Hiatus this one’s probably abandoned tbh the MCU just doesn’t excite me

Meta:

Pirates of the Caribbean:

Will Turner is Not Smart

Will Turner is Not Smart: Dead Man’s Chest Edition

Will Turner is Not Smart: At World’s End Edition

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wvsteria · 1 year

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so this is just going to be a plotting call!!! i will not be doing any starter calls. the threads will be transitioned afterwards. but if there’s a new pairing that we want to put together then we can split up starters and talk about that then! this is mostly to highlight what’s happened to the muses and what their general vibes are now.

aj campos / crush / 19 / aware / paired w maxine baker

aj is pretty emotionally scared, but like who isn’t at this point? maybe their art will be pretty dark for a while. they still really like max and understand it’s not their fault but they’re a bit weary now about any friendships/relationships going forward. she’s recoiled quite a bit for an already reserved person.

alaric saltzman / vampire diaries / 34 / aware / paired w josette laughlin

alaric hates that he even wanted to hurt jo. he’s probably going to be drinking again for a bit to drown his sorrows. working later nights to try and distract himself from the realities of what took over him.

antonia dreykov / marvel / 25 / aware / randomized w jacob hill

antonia is also traumatized. big shock, right? she hates that she was so easily taken advantage of again. it brought her right back to when she was a kid. her recluse state is now just going back to being kind of mean and off-handed for a while until she can be convinced that she’s not just a killing machine.

azula / avatar: the last airbender / 22 / unaware / paired w ty lee

azula actually feels really bad that she just killed someone. she wasn’t in control of her actions and would never (while unaware) want to really hurt someone in that way. they be trying to do some atonement. their version of it at least.

bucky barnes / marvel / 32 / not aware / paired w emmeline vance

hasn’t happened yet. it’s going to be very jarring when he wakes up with all his memories. dealing with the winter soldier’s memories as well as his own... it’ll be a very hard pill to swallow.

calcifer / howl’s moving castle / 25 / unaware / unaffected

calcifer is in a state of wtf just happened- but mostly not much has changed for them. lol

callie torres / grey’s anatomy / 39 / unaware / unaffected

callie is wishing they never left new york at this point. but they’re just going to continue to work hard and try not to die :D

catra / she-ra / 25 / unaware / randomized w emily fitch

catra is also mostly unbothered tbh. they don’t really care about what they did. they feel a little bad but like... no one was permanently harmed so who cares?

cindy berman / fear street part II / 25 / not aware / paired w npc

hasn’t happened yet. cindy is kinda in shock about learning/remembering what happened to her. she’s probably called out of work for like a week. hiding in her apartment and processing and crying about her sister.

dani powell / prodigal son / 32 / aware / paired w malcolm bright

dani has thrown herself into her work, trying to prove to themselves that they’re a good person. or trying to make up for what she thought she did. otherwise... probably avoiding malcolm like the plague frfr. she’s a little miserable.

enzo st. john / vampire diaries / 140 / aware / paired w bonnie bennet

hasn’t happened yet. enzo is going to be living a normal life. probably going to become a vicious mean vampire. so be careful around him !!

gwen blake / the black phone / 20 / aware / randomized w jin ling

gwen is a little ashamed of what happened to her. but she’s trying not to think of it much. maybe will be relying on her visions to do more good around the city.

gwen runck / the 90s show / 18 / aware / paired w leia forman

gwen just hopes to god that leia will forgive them. they kind of scared themselves and never want to feel like that again.

hayley marshall / vampire diaries / 33 / aware / paired w seth gecko

hayley feels awful. like she’s got the biggest hangover ever. she’s going to try and apologize to everyone that she hurt. and she’s also got to reunite with her family still.

heron lyptus / harry potter / 30 / aware / unaffected

hasn’t happened yet. y’all are going to be introduced to the new and improved heron. it’s going to be a mystery to me too what kind of person he’ll be so !! he’ll be finding himself a job, most likely as a personal trainer.

jacen solo / star wars / 27 / aware / paired w tenel ka djo

darth caedus is still lurking below the surface as jacen sinks lower into the shame of what he’s done. he’ll be shutting himself off from his entire family. but especially leia. he still holds that thought that he doesn’t want to see her. but he’ll just be working and trying not to deal with the family drama again to keep caedus from resurfacing.

jacob peralta / brooklyn 99 / 39 / aware / paired w amy santiago

jake feels disgusted that he became the gruber !!!!! especially trying to hurt amy. he’s doing everything in his power to make sure she knows that he’s sorry. and he’s going to go out and make sure his friends are okay and put in more work.

jasper hale / twilight / 179/20 / not aware / unaffected

jasper is surprised to learn there are more out there like him. he isn’t so affected by the events other than thinking this town is insane but he still can’t leave. catch him trying to find more vampires.

justin russo / wizards of waverly place / 26 / aware / randomized w reggie peters

justin feels guilty beyond belief. he always believed that if anyone in his family were to turn evil it’d be alex. but he was right at the same level with her. he has to reevaluate himself and will be trying to do as much good as he can.

kate bishop / marvel / 23 / aware / paired w america chavez

kate hopes that this hasn’t ruined anything between her and america. she’s quite actually dreading seeing her. so she’ll be everywhere else and bothering everyone else in the meantime. she’s kinda going about business as usual just extra clingy to other people to avoid america.

kiara carrera / outerbanks / 22 / aware / paired w jj maybank

kie is still without her humanity so she’s kind of on a rampage? rip. she’s avoiding turning her humanity on because she doesn’t want to see what her friends think about her and what she did, especially jj.

lucrecia / elite / 20 / aware / randomized w jennifer honey

lu is frightened of this town now. she knew it was magical and different, but she didn’t know it was to this extent. she’s going to be doing anything she can to try and distract her from what happened. overworking herself with school. pretending it never happened.

marcellus gerard / vampire diaries: the originals / 216/25 / not aware / unaffected

marcel thinks this place is insane but he’s also a vampire so like ? not much has changed for him.

marie clay / vampire diaries: the originals oc / 193 (24) / aware / randomized w dart

marie’s humanity is back on but tbh she wasn’t that nice with it ??

mouse honrada / pll: original sin / 18 / not aware / paired w toph beifong

mouse is having even worse nightmares now. she can’t sleep at night anymore. they really need help tbh.

oliver queen / dc’s the arrow / 36 / unaware / paired w caitlin snow

oliver is really dreading what this will do to the company and his public image. he’s concerned about where all that fighting knowledge came from but ... let’s just focus on the company for now... because that makes way more sense in his head right now.

padme amidala / star wars / 27 / not aware / randomized w katara

hasn’t happened yet. padme is going to be trying to figure out how she’s alive again and what the hell’s happened to her family? everything is a hot mess ??? and sheev ?? is vice president ??? what is happening ??

penelope park / legacies / 18 / not aware / paired w josie saltzman

hasn’t happened yet. with her memories regained, pen is probably just going to try and console josie and will be trying to figure out a way to make sure the rest of their friends remember. including lizzie.... who isn’t technically her friend but still.

piper halliwell / charmed / 35 / not aware / unaffected

piper is kinda just stuck in a perpetual state of what the fuck right now. she got info dumped on and doesn’t really believe a thing she’s hearing so she’s just trying to be a normal chef girl let her be ??

rachel green / friends / 27 / not aware / paired w bela dimitrescu

rachel might still be afraid of bela and is most certainly terrified of her sister. she doesn’t know how things are supposed to go back to normal now. catch her crying everyday while shopping. #retail therapy that’ll break her bank. (credit cards tbh).

riley matthews / girl meets world / 18 / aware / paired w maya hart

riley is going to be overcompensating by being extra extra extra riley with her friends especially maya. she’s not that girl and would never want to hurt anyone especially her friends !!!!!

roxanne weasley / harry potter / 21 / aware / randomized w parker halliwell

roxy is really not herself anymore. she’ hasn’t picked up her wand since that day. she’s pretty much locked herself in her room. she’s not going to want to talk to anyone...literally... don’t think she’s really spoken much beyond necessity since it happened.

rue / the hunger games / 20 / aware / paired w luke patterson

rue is a little nervous but seeing as it happened to everyone, they really just want to make sure that luke’s okay and that he doesn’t hate her. she wishes more and more everyday though that she wasn’t stuck here.

samara palpatine / star wars / 24 / aware / randomized w hermione granger

samara’s only regret is that she didn’t get to off her target. but oh well. she got to be in many fights and is pleased with the outcome of most of them. just wait till the other shoe drops my dear. she’s also going to be getting a kick out of torturing the twins.

sarah miller / the last of us / 18 / not aware / unaffected

sarah is scared of this town now. she’s a little nervous to go out and do things but her life can’t stop because of this. she’s probably going to search for self defense classes.

stu macher / scream / 18 / aware / unaffected

stu had a great fucking time. he’s only sad every day can’t be like this. so uh... he’s chasing that high. sorry to any people that catch him at the wrong time.

tara carpenter / scream / 19 / not aware / paired w amber freeman

tara now has a different view of just about everyone that was really close to them. and they don’t know what to do about that. they’re a little lost right now.

violet / arcane / 25 / aware / unaffected

vi is just going to be checking in on her family, including jinx and caitlyn. screw silco for threatening her friend. she already didn’t like him so now she’s going to try and plan something.

willa lykensen / disney’s zombies / 20 / aware / randomized w riley biers

willa feels extremely bad. she’s never supposed to lose her cool like that. especially as the alpha. she’s questioning her position but she’s still going to try and stay strong for her pack.

#hw: plot call

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sunshinediaz · 1 year

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i don't think it's worthwhile to think much abt this bc obsessing over top/bottom always is a weird thing across contexts, but the stucky fandom is so weird in this regard bc from a casual's POV u would totally expect bottom steve to be the thing that certain sections would obsess over, but in the contrary the more you look into the still active parts of the fandom, they're actually hostile to bottom steve (with a very ooc and weird idea of feminization wrt Bucky that's its own other can of worms that could take up a whole academic Gender paper tbh)

if anything, what I've learned is (and as much as I tried not to over generalize, this pattern keeps popping up) but it seems that gay men (and some others) who like stucky tend to prefer Steve as the bottom while the stereotypical demographics that populate the "typical" areas of fanworks tend to go the other way very very rigidly

again, I bet one could write a whole paper abt what this Means, but tbh it's probably some flavor of the typical weird fandomisms of turning T/B pref into an identity

this is so unprompted

#my questions have questions #i’m operating on the assumption you didn’t mean for this to come to me because wow #talk

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fandomtrashfox · 1 year

Note

About character bingo, Loki and Bucky?

I'm going to assume this is MCU Loki and Bucky we're talking about, but feel free to send another ask if you have another version of them in mind.

"I'll write a small word vomit thing about them." *Proceeds to write four paragraphs.*

Bucky showed up in the MCU first, so he's first here, too. Bucky Buchanan Barnes, huh? I'll admit, in the first Captain America movie, I didn't really have much in way of opinion about him. I was in the 'they sure do exist' camp. Didn't give him much thought.

That did change, however, when he returned as the Winter Soldier. He was terrifying in Civil war, ngl. But I also thought he was kinda cool. After that, sitting on the movies for a while and rewatching them a few times, I grew a far stronger appreciation for the character. (Which was probably due to how young I was when I watched the movies initially, but let's ignore that-) Which makes the awful way the fandom and current writers treat and mischaracterize him even worse, tbh. But we're not talking about that right now-

Unrelated: Bucky gives me gender envy like mad. (I'm Boyflux, btw.)

I want to wrap him in a big fuzzy blanket and give him a hot cocoa, dude deserves some rest and tlc.

Comparing how I feel about Bucky to Loki is super unfair... to Bucky. Though honestly, it would be unfair to all Marvel characters, since Loki is my favorite. (*Insert people rolling their eyes because me liking a character that's 'popular' makes me annoying/cringe, apparently.*)

Fun fact: Loki is actually one of the first Marvel characters I was ever introduced to. Though, granted, it wasn't MCU Loki. I'm constantly rotating them in my mind like Banana.mp4 (Rotat e). I can also relate to them on a scarily close level. Like jeez, my older sibling was kicked out right before I learned about my bloody heritage from my father, too, da fuq?

Loki in the MCU is probably the most mis-characterized, and the most unabashedly hated and poorly handled character by the writers in the later phases. Which sucks, because his attempts to prove himself and feeling unworthy are exactly what made them so interesting. But it seems the writers like to mis-characterize him as being arrogant and self-centred, when they're actually the opposite in every movie before Ragnarok. *sigh*

He deserves a break, too, tbh. They both need some tlc stat.

...Y'know, they really missed an opportunity by never letting these two meet. But then again, the MCU has/had a problem with casual interactions. (I mean, Thor and Natasha barely interacted in any of the movies despite being on the same team.)

#thanks for the ask!#character opinion bingo #character opinions #random fandom thoughts #fandom bingo #fandom blog #fandomtrashfox

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buckysswinter · 2 years

Text

tolerate it- two

this was inspired by taylor’s song

18+ minors dni

warnings: angst, more angst???, age gap??? (bucky is two years older than reader), bucky being an asshole tbh

not edited or beta’d- do not repost or translate!

(au)brother'sbestfriend!bucky barnes x female reader

word count: 1,062

<<previous part | next part>>

i sit and watch you, i notice everything you do or don't do

y/n had heard the door close from her bedroom, noah's engine roaring indicating that they were leaving. she was sulking in her room, the pit in her stomach turned to a void. y/n couldn't miss the way bucky's eyes sparkled talking about dot, or how his aura got brighter. to distract herself, she picked up a book from her shelf. while the boys go out almost every weekend, y/n stay home reading books or catching up with shows. the buzzing of her phone distracted her before she opens her book, seeing her best friend sarah's contact popping up on her phone.

-"hello" y/n was curious as to why sarah was calling her.

-"y/n, sam's throwing a party and i need you to come by, please" sarah sounded exasperated. y/n didn't feel like getting ready, especially after her conversation with bucky, which she has yet to fill sarah in about.

-"uhm, yeah sure let me get changed and i'll be on my way" y/n knows how sarah would drag her if she had said no and to make it easier for herself she got up and ready.

thinking about it now, this was probably the party noah and bucky were attending, after all sam was their teammate and the third member of their little friend group. that was how y/n met sarah and grew close to her. sarah was a little more outspoken than y/n, telling girls to fuck off if they had asked her to give her brother their numbers. sarah was also the only one to know about y/n's secret love for bucky, always encouraging her to tell him the truth.

since noah took the car, y/n had to take the bike. she usually wouldn't op for this form of transportation but it was either that or walking. she smiles as she remembers why she learned how to ride, it was because of bucky. she had heard a conversation between her brother and bucky talking about bucky's dad teaching him how to ride one and eventually bucky promised noah that "girls like that sort of stuff". noah begged their parents to pay for his lessons and they had one condition which was, she would learn along with him. noah grumbled at the fact that you were included in this, it was only supposed to be his and bucky's activity and now she were in the mix. she weren't too happy about the decision of your parents either, but they felt the need to put you out there since your only piece of entertainment was reading books and sketching objects. this often happened, when noah would ask their parents to do an activity, y/n would often tag along, the longer it happened the less noah minded. bucky didn't mind either and soon their relationship bloomed, although bucky firmly just saw her as his best friend's sister, y/n took what she could get. noah started ditching y/n recently, when he's decided she was old enough to make her own friends and hang out with them. it was also the fact that he had girls with him and he didn't need his little sister there to be a cock block. y/n didn't mind but she missed hanging out with bucky for long periods of time.

as y/n approached the wilson residence, she could hear the music blaring. the trashed lawn coming into view as she parked the bike in the tiny space in the driveway. she used the backdoor entrance and as she step foot in the house she hears his laughter echo. her eyes focus on him by the kitchen counter, his head tilted up and his nose scrunched. he looked so radiant, dot is by his side whispering sweet nothings. her heart churned at the sight. the blaring music stops for a bit and she hears dot say her name which made her think dot was calling her over. as y/n made her way to the counter she hears bucky's reply,

-"oh y/n? yeah she's like a little sister to me. you know she barely has friends so noah and i let her hang with us," the music was back to blaring by then but his voice was loud and clear. his response to dot's question makes her stomach churn and her head spin. she tried to run, turning around and knocking over someone with their drink in hand. she profusely said sorry and tried to leave until, she heard his voice.

-"hey doll you're here!" the nickname felt disgusting coming out of his mouth and all she could do was turn around and make eye contact.

bucky left dot's side and gave her a tight squeeze, y/n tensed up as his hand enveloped around her. he gave her face a look and smiled, happy to see her.

-"what are you doing here doll?" he seemed genuinely curious, maybe he thinks she was following him. her overwhelming thoughts invaded her brain, was she really that annoying? had she been forcing herself into a friendship with bucky? were the teasing and inside jokes between them fake?

-"oh um, sarah invited me but i'm not feeling too well so i think i'm just gonna make my way back home" there was concern written in bucky's face as soon as she said she wasn't feeling well.

-"are you fine? want me to drive you home?" she was trying hard not to cry in front of so many people that she couldn't muster up words and she only shook her head to tell him no. he nodded in response letting her go completely and going back by dot's side. y/n noticed how he immediately reached up for her waist, his radiant smile coming back to his face. she ran out as fast as she can texting sarah that she couldn't make it due to not feeling well and turned off her phone. y/n got on her bike and drove as fast as she could, her hearting beating fast, her tears making their way down her face as she gripped the handles.

she couldn't believe how stupid she was, thinking bucky even slight reciprocated her feelings. it was even worse that she thought he saw her as a friend, someone to trust and enjoy moments with.

a/n: so......

again if you wanna be added to my taglist let me know :) if your name is crossed out tumblr didn’t let me tag you!!

taglist: @capmanranger @kaitioo @red42985 @sipsteacasually @justyourlocalwhore @minetticatinwonderland @eclecticpatrolroadlawyer @obsessionforoldermen @one-shot-plus-size @thatsbucknasty @simplefan-638 @noemiix1 @lightning-fast54 @echoingintheabyss @themorningsunshine @hotleaf-juice @adriii-omega @introvertedmouse

#sebastian stan #bucky x reader #bucky barnes one shot #sebastian stan fanfic #bucky x female reader #sebastian stan fanfiction #sebastian stan one shot #sebastian stan x you #seb stan #bucky angst #tolerate it #buckybarnes angst #bucky barnes

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swtki · 2 years

Text

Surprise Pregnancy - Marvel

Summary: Head cannons for how the MCU boys would react to an unplanned pregnancy.

Warnings: mentions of sex, mostly fluff, all characters are pro choice, swearing, slight angst, mentions of cigarettes, mention of breeding kink.

A/N: this is gonna be like the one I did for the HP boys.

Steve Rogers

Okay lets be honest I think that man wears a condom AND pulls out bc he will take NO RISKS.

Until after you’re married, of course.

Then its a sometimes condom sometimes morning after pill type beat.

Its not that he doesn’t want a kid, he just wants to wait until someone isn’t trying to kill him every day.

Steve, who usually has pink cheeks and relaxed eyes, went cold and clammy when you mentioned a late period.

Home tests weren’t really around for him, so he’s used to hearing about cycles and the science of that.

Man gets out a full calendar to get to the bottom of this.

“Okay so if you got your last one here, and then the next one here, your cycle will last about 29 days. Meaning you should have gotten it here but its now two weeks past that point-“

He probably has one of the girls take you to the doctor to get a test.

But he is happy asf when he gets your call.

honestly Steve is from a generation where they gave a kid a Marlboro and called it childcare.

Within 9 months he has tried to give you: Coffee, deli meat, the cheese you can’t eat, sushi, any type of soda to ever walk this fucking planet (plus Thor trying to give you soda from those bougie planets)

He will not buy a book. Don’t even try to ask him.

Although the apartment is small, its much better than the tower.

Steve is waiting outside during delivery. Support from the hall!

He want’s to name your kid after his dead relative with an old persons name 💀

“We are not naming our child Edna.”

“Is Ashley much better??”

The way this man is so incapable of holding a child in a way that doesn’t make you feel like he’s gonna drop it.

Lowkey afraid of babies tbh

Parenting styles clash of course.

“No I didn’t plug the ‘ wall socket protectors ‘ in. Back in my day-“

Bucky prob the Godfather.

Overall: Fun dad.

Bucky Barnes

He has a breeding kink but like….forgets that breeding produces a human.

Tbh I don’t think Bucky wants kids

Like they aren’t in the plan.

He wants to be the cool uncle.

Also his kids would physically be older than him at some point and thats kinda weird.

Anyways, he’s pretty shocked when you pop up with not one, but four positive tests.

man literally got up and went to another room, he couldn’t deal

ceo of needing to sleep on it

ceo of leaving his gf alone

He comes back all business

“Do you…y’know…want a….y’know?”

Man would pull it out himself if you asked him to I know that bionic arm could come in handy 👀

after many many many hours of talking, you decide the study should be the new nursery.

Oh boy is redecoration a fun time

“I love you, Bucky, but we cannot have world war II memorabilia in our baby’s nursery.”

not too happy about hanging it up in the living room bc he kinda wants to keep his age private yet he will not say “these were my great grandfathers”

Probably carried around a sack of flour so he could learn how to hold a baby

RIP the first two sacks, they were dropped.

refuses to go to classes

will let you hold his metal arm in delivery tho

Steve’s the Godfather ofc

Bucky kind of treats the baby like another adult but…weaker.

He’s so weird around the baby

He adores it tho

Like falls asleep with them on his chest

slightly scary though because he can toss and turn so its good until panic sets in.

over all: fun but chaotic dad.

Loki Laufeyson

Honestly I can’t imagine Loki stays in the courting stage very long.

He’s probably married you, bedded you, and moved you in all within seven months.

And three months after that you’re pregnant with his (first) child.

He of course has wanted this practically since day 1

So when you show him the test sticks he was like 😃 what

then you had to explain what a midguardian pregnancy test was

he was ecstatic lol

Nursery done in a day

Theres gold.

decorative gold

in a babies room.

He extra like that ig

He refuses to let you do anything. Need to stand up? He’s helping you do so.

Need water? conjured that bitch

the way he will not hesitate

He was in the room during delivery, his hand being crushed by yours

Agreeing on a modern name, still with roots to Nordic culture.

Loki wants more almost immediately

He keeps an eye on his baby all the time

and lets you sleep while he casts himself in the nursery to take care of the crying child.

He’s scared for Thor.

Like he knows Thor and your kid might get into some bullshit and he doesn’t want that.

uncle tingz

overall: Protective af

Thor Oddinson

Oh this is a wild ride, strap in.

Bro I know I said Bucky had a breeding kink but didn’t actually want a kid then?

Ok well Thor has a breeding kink and he means it.

You’re both prepared for a kid, so if it happens so be it.

He literally opened a window and screamed “A NEW HEIR IS FORMING!” when he found out.

Weirdo.

Still you weren’t exactly sure the two of you should be parents.

For one, the dining room was covered in smashed mugs.

But he loved you and you loved him, so you decided to keep it.

Complete opposite of Loki

Even when you’re struggling to get out of bed bc you’re so big hes like 👁👁 what

Anyways, he does help when he can.

He wants the kid to be a kid, like a normal non-king kid.

So the nursery is pretty modest.

Many earth tones, a lot of traditional norse decor.

He named the baby after his Mother, Frigga

The kingdom was so happy at the new addition to the royal home.

He prob started teaching her to fight as soon as she could walk.

He’s a very protective father

Loki and Frigga prank the hell out of him, teaching her magic and spells.

Overall: Proud parent

Peter Parker

Out of all of them this was probably the most unplanned.

You two are only starting your first year of university, still living in separate dorms.

Your period is like three weeks late.

You’re hoping its just stress.

Then the nausea kicks in.

So you do what any person in denial would do, you go to the campus clinic for an antibiotic or antiviral.

“Are you aware you’re with child?” bruh moment

Not sure what to do, you avoid your boyfriend for a whole week.

He corners you like “🥺 what happen”

so you break down and start rambling

“IwenttotheclinicandtheytoldmeI’mpregnantand nowIhavetodecideifIwanttokeepitornotandifyouleaveIdon’tknowwhatI’lldo.”

hes just like 😅 oh god

Hes supportive, even saying he’ll go to the ab*rtion clinic with you if that’s what you choose.

He doesn’t want anything to hurt you, so he takes over your course work for the time being.

Over the next two weeks you reach a conclusion; You’d like to keep it.

Peter is supportive of course, he always wanted to be a dad some day.

May is kinda disappointed ngl

But she is also supportive, even agreeing to lend a hand so you two can stay in school.

Luckily, you live in a time where parenting and school are able to be done at the same time.

You urge Peter to stay in normal classes so he can stay on track for his masters

You switch to an online program, spending more time at home.

Btw you moved into May’s for a bit

Because although she’d never been pregnant herself, she could take care of you.

Peter really did come over every weekend.

sort of off topic but if the spider bite changed his DNA, would his kid have powers?

Anyways, he was there during delivery and he fell in love with your kid as soon as they were born.

He decided to transfer to NYU so he could stay close

Shitty apartment down the hall from May = new home

overall: king shit

like my work? Reblog so others can see it!!

taglist:

@dreamy-clousds @mssbridgerton @katiekatbooks

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castlevader · 3 years

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Can I request a Bucky fic where the AC is out and they have to find a way to pass the time until it can get fixed? You could do fluffy where they’re playing games or something or smutty where Bucky has some other ideas 👀 I live in california and it’s 115 today :’)

hi! as always, thank you so much for your request, i see what you did here 👀 what about a bit of both? i’m really sorry it took me so long! i was so insecure about it you have no idea, i hope it doesn’t suck or whatever…. anyway, 115 ?! omg, stay hydrated and be careful! i’d probably hug my AC and never let it go tbh, i can’t stand hot summer days

WARNINGS: smut 18+, fingering, making out, thigh riding, dirty talk, unprotected sex (stay safe out there!), multiple orgasms, slight overstimulation, bucky is a tease, smut & fluff because why not, sorry for possible typos i was too lazy to read it and check 👉🏼👈🏼

WORD COUNT: 1792

IF YOU WANNA BE TAGGED: check this

READ ME! english is not my first language, sorry for any possible error. please be kind!

CREDITS GIF HERE

“What does it mean ‘it doesn’t work’?” You gave Bucky a worried look, hoping you misheard what he just said.

“Doll, the air conditioner doesn’t work. That’s it.” He nervously chuckled, trying to it cool. Both of you were feeling hot and you suggested to turn it on, but today life was giving you a hard time, and the AC stopped working.

It was hotter than any other day, you showered like two times in two hours and a half? Bucky did the same, probably.

“Look, I can call someone and see what we can do.” He grabbed his phone from the coffee table and you just sank more onto the couch. “Please, anything.” You huffed.

You closed your eyes, trying to calm down. You could hear Bucky talking into the phone but were too distracted to focus on his exact words. Once he finished, he came back and sat on the couch, sighing.

“I have a bad news and a good news.” He said, recalling your attention. “Bad first.” You muttered, ready to listen but keeping your eyes closed. “The bad news is that we have to wait till this evening, the good one is that it won’t take too much time to fix it.”

“Are you serious?! Bucky, it’s fucking ten in the morning.” You widened your eyes and look at him, checking if he was serious. Of course he was. “Baby, relax. We just need to pass the time.” He offered a smile and you simply nodded, fighting the urge to lay down on the floor for some relief. You started feeling frustrated and Bucky being this calm wasn’t helping. How could he be so collective when outside seemed like everything was melting and ready to turn into literally fire.

“Listen, we can play some games. What do you think of Mario Kart maybe? I love your competitiveness.” He got closer and left some kisses on your heated cheek. “Mmh, alright. Maybe a round or two.” You got up and grabbed the controllers, then sitting again on the couch after giving one to Bucky.

You two ended up playing more than two rounds, but only because you were loosing and you really wanted to beat his ass at the game.

“Accept it, you’re just fooling yourself.” He said laughing when you sat on the floor muttering ‘I can play better from here’.

The funny thing was, Bucky won again and you just got up and hit his chest with your controller. “Fuck you, Barnes.” You pointed a finger at him and then stormed into your room.

You sank yourself onto the mattress and moaned when you felt it was colder than the couch downstairs. You closed your eyes, positioning yourself onto your stomach.

“I’m sorry, I guess I just learned how to play properly.” Bucky entered your room and you mumbled something, without actually moving.

Bucky sat on the edge of the bed and sighed lightly, closing his eyes for a moment, then an idea popped up in his head and turned to look at you. His face wore a wicked smile, but you were completely oblivious.

His metal hand started caressing your bare leg, slowly moving up and down, he was studying your reaction. You just shivered but enjoyed the coldness of his hand.

“You seem tensed.” His voice got low and you tensed for real now. You turned around and looked at his beautiful face, his eyes were trailing over your hot body. You noticed after him your nipples poking through your tank top, Bucky licked his lips and then locked his eyes on yours. You were probably blushing, the room felt much hotter than before.

“Wanna try something to relieve your stress?” He smirked and you bit your lip, you slowly took his hand and placed it on your clothed stomach, you could feel the coldness of his prosthetic through the fabric of your clothes.

“Is that a yes?” He whispered, slowly caressing you. Your hand was still holding his, following his movements. “Show me what you have in mind.” You sat beside him and then moved to position yourself onto his lap.

Bucky simply smiled, then cupped your cheeks and leaned into you, latching your lips together. The kiss quickly grew hotter, you circled his neck with your arms to keep Bucky close to you and he grabbed your hips and settled you onto one of his leg, then slowly started moving it between your thighs.

You groaned into his mouth, leaning your forehead on his. He smirked and grabbed your ass cheek with his flesh hand, holding you firmly. “Show me how desperate you are now.” He whispered against your parted lips.

You shivered, feeling a knot forming into your belly. You started grinding onto his thigh, covered by his black shorts. He flexed his leg, adding some stimulation. You grew wetter by any seconds now, the sensation was heaven, your swollen clit was pulsing making you moan out loud. “Come on, make a mess on my thigh. I know you wanna cum so bad.” His lips were near your ear, his words going straight to your core and you felt your body setting on fire.

You grabbed his shoulders tight, grinding hard on him. You jolted your hips, feeling your wetness ruining your panties and your shorts.

“Bucky…” You moaned against his cheek, moving desperately your hips to reach your orgasm. “Yeah, just like that.” He grunted, grabbing your hips harshly to guide your movements. You finally reached your peak, a strong wave of pleasure washed over you.

Bucky kept his eyes focused on you, giving you some time to recover. Your heart was beating faster, you were sure he could feel it clearly. He laid you down on the mattress and took some time to kiss you all over your face and down your neck.

“Baby, I really need you.” You whispered, looking at him. He smiled against your skin and quickly kneeled between your legs. His hands caressed your hips before removing your tank top, exposing your chest, and then pulled down both your shorts and you panties, tossing them away on the floor.

Bucky leaned down and closed his lips around one of your hard nipple, sucking and licking. His big hands parted your legs further and you shivered when his left hand brushed distractedly against your heated center. You bucked up your hips, silently asking him to touch you there.

“You’re so needy.” He muttered against your skin, making you moan. He finally started rubbing tight circles on your swollen clit with his flesh thumb, you arched your back giving in into the pleasure. His mouth moved to your other breast and gave it the same treatment.

“Oh, Buck–please!” You grabbed his wrist, holding him tight. “Tell me what you want, baby.” He slowed down his movements, you pushed his hand towards your wet hole, giving him a hint. “You want my fingers?” You chewed on your cheek and gave him a quick look, only to find him smiling innocently.

“I hate you.” You muttered, letting go of his wrist. “Oh really?” He licked his lips and slowly used his fingertips to spread your wetness around, wetting his fingers. Two of his fingers slipped inside, Bucky didn’t waited and quickly moved them, hitting your sweet spot. You rolled your eyes, moaning his name.

“Fuck, you’re so beautiful… making a mess of my hand.” His voice made you shiver, your legs were slightly shaking. You were getting close to your second orgasm quick, his other hand reached to rub your clit harshly. “Bucky, I’m close…” You moaned, grabbing his short hair desperately. “Cream my fingers, c’mon doll.” He licked his lips, Bucky kissed your sweaty forehead and your cheeks, moving his fingers fast and adding the right pressure on your throbbing clit.

“Oh, god!” You pushed your hips against his hands, shaking under his body. “Give it to me, now.” He grunted against your skin, pinching your clit.

When your second orgasm hit you, quickly you pushed his hands away feeling overstimulated. Your legs were shaking and it seemed like your heart was gonna leave your body. The room was much hotter than before and it was all his fault.

“You’re so fucking hot, you have no idea.” Bucky pulled you into a messy kiss, all teeth and tongue. Both of you moaned into the kiss, before he raised himself and undressed himself, his eyes never leaving your beautiful body. “What… Bucky, wait, I can’t.” You propped yourself up on your elbows and gave him a pleading look. “You can’t?” He mocked, settling again between your legs.

Bucky gave himself a few pumps, a shaky breath left his lips. “Oh, but I know that you can, doll.” He ran his hard cock between your folds, collecting your moisture, and finally he slipped inside of you, quickly bottoming out.

Both of you groaned at the sensation, your walls squeezed him and before moving Bucky grabbed your hands and held them beside your head. You squeezed your eyes shut. His lips brushed against yours, slightly parted. “You okay?” He said, waiting for a response. “Yeah…” You panted, nodding. “Good girl.” He kissed your nose and after that he started moving, finding the right rhythm.

Bucky loved watching your face, you squeezed his hands when he hit that spot inside of you that made you curl your toes. “Don’t stop!” You pushed your hips towards him, moaning louder.

You wrapped your legs around his waist, feeling him moving impossibly further. Bucky alternated quick thrusts with slow and hard ones. You loved hearing him muttering curses under his breath, holding you under his body.

“You almost there?” He let go of one of your hand and cupped your breast to squeeze you gently, he rolled his hips letting your clit brush against his pelvis. “Yes, fuck!” You arched your back, you moved your free hand into his hair, pulling it.

He lowered his hand between your legs and rubbed quick circles into your clit to add stimulation. “Bucky, I… shit, don’t stop!” You panted, feeling the familiar knot forming into your belly. “You gonna cum for me? Gonna give me another one?” He grunted, closing his eyes at the feeling of your walls gripping his sensitive cock.

Another two or three hard thrusts and you reached your climax, Bucky cummed right after you, filling you up with his load. You heard him cursing against the skin of your neck, slowing down his movements.

“You did so good for me, doll.” He lazily kissed your jaw, still holding your hand. “This room is hotter than hell.” You muttered, making him giggle. “I see how much disappointed you are.” He mocked you before kissing your lips.

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trash-for-seabass · 2 years

Text

The knots in your brain

Pairing: Stucky (mostly bucky) x MassageTherapist!Reader.

Warnings: none this chapter but eventually there will be some

Authors note: I got a new job as the front desk person at a massage parlor (🥳) and tbh I Fucking HAD to write this. also please forgive me I know this chapter is dog shit.

•••

Tony Stark

He was a bit of a narcissist but I couldn’t deny he took care of his team well.

The Avengers had the best medical coverage in all of America, hell probably even the world. Everything from therapy, to steam rooms, even Hair Prosthesis were offered for the renowned heroes.

But I definitely got the most work.

When Mr. Stark had first approached me with an offer to become the avengers personal massage therapist I thought ‘hey what the hell’, he was offering me good money and come on who wouldn't want to work with earths mightiest hero's. But with time I had learned this wasn’t just a walk in the park like I had initially assumed. I worked so often I had gotten to know almost every Avenger personally.

Captain America, Steve as he insisted I call him, always asked for a deep tissue massage, mainly focused on his arms and upper back and honestly his hard super soldier muscles hurt my elbows and forearms. Dr.Banner often requested a relaxing full body, but I always paid special attention to his scalp, trying to ease the doctors headaches. The Russian spy, Natasha, preferred I work on her legs and hips, and she liked it rough, her flirty attitude could make a dominatrix blush. My employer, Tony, liked a chest massage (and a “shaft massage” that he requested one time. I almost put my foot up his ass for that). The hawk, Barton, surprisingly wanted me to focus on his shoulders and neck.

I nodded a hello to my receptionist Ben as i walked through the door. He looked as tired, and hungover, as i felt, bags covering his eyes and his normally neat blonde hair tousled. Never again would we attend an Iron man party.

"Alright" I began, easily recognizing the look of shame on his face "Who did you try to go home with?"

His face turned a dark shade of red and he buried it in his hands, knowing I was gonna rip the answer out of him one way or another. ".....Vision"

I choked on my morning peppermint tea "Are you serious Ben?" I yelped, laughing so hard my sides began to ache.

Ben glared at me, "Hey he's sexy and you know it!"

The statement sent me into another round of laughs, making me wheeze as i made my way back to my studio, the relaxing music filling my head and finally calming me down as I wiped a tear away from my eyes. Thursdays were always slow days, but still i had a few clients here and there. I went to work plugging in the warming bowl full of Himalayan salt stones, and turning the temperature up to a nice warm heat on the wet cloths. Retrieving a fresh sheet from the dryer, I prepped my massage table and lit a few of the scented candles, filling the room with an aroma of eucalyptus.

As I stood back to admire my nice little studio I could faintly make the sound of Ben’s voice out through the wall. Well actually it was the sound of Ben’s flirting voice to be exact. I quickly whipped out my phone and checked my schedule, seeing if someone had made a last minute appointment. It was probably Sam Wilson, the falcon, as he much preferred to just walk in instead of making appointments like a normal person. Still i could never stay mad at him, he always insisted on buying me drinks and his flirting made me smile. Quickly scrolling to today’s date I noticed a new set of letters adorning the client line.

JBB

Who the hell was JBB?

The icon flicked from a solid blue to a fluorescent pink letting me know the client had arrived. Bewildered, and a bit curious, my feet led you to the door separating the studio and the lobby faster then I’d like to admit. Swinging the door open, my jaw nearly hit the floor when you saw him.

James Buchanan Barnes.

The winter soldier.

Steve had mentioned him enough that i never imagined I would actually meet him. He was extremely introverted, preferring to be left alone even on missions, and I couldn’t blame him. Everyone knew the story of the winter soldier by now, a brainwashed man forced to fight, and kill, for the organization HYDRA. Steve had mentioned Barn’s PTSD in a past session so I didn’t think I would ever find him in my little studio, tucked away in the avengers compound. Not to mention the elephant in the room.

Or the vibranium arm in this case.

It was hard not to take the super soldier in, the tight black tank and gym shorts he wore didn’t leave much to the imagination, but the gleaming smoky silver metal held your eyes. And when Ben cleared his throat I realized I had been staring.

“Ah! So sorry Mr. Barnes I’m just surprised to see you here. Please this way. Also I’m (y/n) hi!” The words tumbled out as I extended my hand. A quick glance at Ben told me I were acting like an idiot. But Mr. Barnes didn’t look appalled or annoyed, rather he slightly raised an eyebrow and the corners of his lips turned up ever so slightly.

He slipped his hand into mine, his large palm and long fingers completely covering the appendage and he gave my hand a gentle squeeze. It was hard to suppress the shiver that ran down my spine. After he released my hand I turned and lead him back to my studio, quickly retrieving my patient intake form clipboard from Ben.

“So” I begin, trying to use my professional voice to hide the blush dragging its claws over my heart. “Are there any medical conditions that might prevent you from getting a massage?”

“No”

A man of few words, got it. “Alright” I continued, jotting the few things I had learned about him onto my clip board. “Is there any particular area you want me to focus on? Or are you just here for a relaxing massage?”

In the dim light I can just barley make out the sight of him tucking the tip of his bottom lip between his teeth, and the slight worry that flickers across his gaze. He reaches out with his right hand to squeeze the his left shoulder, right where metal and flesh meet. I reach a tentative hand out and lightly brush my fingertips over his arm, the cold metal causing my fingers to tingle. I flick my eyes up to meet his hazel blue ones, perfectly framed by his long chestnut hair, and give him a gentle smile. That seems to ease him a slight bit, but thankfully its just enough for him to ask. “Relaxing sounds nice. I...I don't know if that would work here though” He gives his shoulder a squeeze “Honestly your the professional, so whatever you think would work”

I smile, knowing Steve had said something to him about me makes me feel,,,,warm? Kinda fuzzy? I nod, moving my hand to ever so lightly rest my palm on the sleek metal. I shouldn't be doing this, this was beyond unprofessional, and yet there was something about James Buchanan Barnes that made me stop caring about the world for a single moment. I hold my hand there for a heartbeat longer before turning around and pulling things out of my cabinet.

I start talking again as I work on fishing out my massage oil, specifically the lavender scented one. “Alright so you'll dress down to your comfort level and lie down on the table, and if at any point you want me to stop for any reason please just-” I turn back around and my jaw nearly hits the floor. Bucky stands before me completely shirtless, every ridge and curve perfectly accented by the cheap plastic candles scattered around my room. I swallow hard, trying to pull my eyes from his abs. I quickly step towards the door, saying some bullshit about having to bring the paperwork to Ben and grab my water bottle.

The second the door closes behind me I audibly wheeze. Ben quickly minimizes the webpage of magic the gathering cards and spins to look at me. I don't even need to say anything, he just gives me a knowing look. I shoot him a glare, warning him not to make a comment, and hand him the sheet to scan into our system. Then I quickly grab my water bottle, chugging the whole thing and running back to refill it before knocking against the wooden door and pushing it open when I hear Bucky give the all clear.

Bucky is sprawled out on his stomach, the white table sheet pulled up just enough to kiss his lower back, while his rippling back muscles are out and on display. I have to take a moment to remind myself that I am a god dammed professional before I close the door and get to work.

The massage is almost completely uneventful, rubbing massage oil over his back and gently working out the knots that live there. When I reach his scalp I’m pleasantly surprised to discover his hair is soft and silky and then it’s time for his Vibranium arm.

I gently take his forearm in my hands and instruct him to move it so it’s hanging off the edge near his face. The area where flesh and metal meet is decorated with scars, one long one stretching to his spine. I reached out and touched the tip, tracing it back to its source. Bucky whimpered slightly, the sound of servos and gear whirring hummed through the room and he balled his metal hand into a fist.

“Are you sure you still want me to do this?” I ask, leaning over the table and lining up my elbow with the scarred flesh.

He only gives me a tiny little “yeah” in response but it’s not even slightly convincing.

So I give him an idea. “I can tell you don’t like to talk much, but I’ve seen people with….” I try to choose my next words carefully “traumatic injuries before and 9/10 times, it’s helped.”

Then Bucky does something that surprises me. He laughs. It’s a very small laugh, more of a chuckle really but it is a laugh, but it’s still a laugh. “What about the one guy?”

“Well that was his traumatic injury so” I say without even thinking about it. I regret the words as soon as they leave my mouth but then another chuckle rumbles through his chest.

I can’t help but laugh back, it’s odd the winter soldier has such a contagious laugh. Gently I bring my elbow down and rest it on his back, waiting for him to start talking.

“….does Steve talk about our childhood often?”

“Not really” I say with a shrug. “He talks more about current events”

“Well there was this one time on Halloween where, oh fuck that’s the spot” he purrs when I run my elbow over a particularly tight muscle. Bucky takes a moment then starts up again. “On halloween when we were both 15. We had this neighbor, mrs. Mildred who was a total hag. So Steve and I had made these really crappy masks out of paper and Ah~”

“Shit you ok?” I ask, freezing like a deer in headlights.

“I’m better then ok doll”

Hearing him call me doll sends butterfly’s shooting into my belly. I place the palm of my hand into the scarred tissue and start rolling the muscle underneath which makes Bucky purr a bit more before he continues his story. “Well Steve and I rang her door bell and the minute she opened it I threw a sack of flour in her face and we ran”

He pauses to laugh a bit, the deep rumble in his chest vibrating through my finger tips.

“Now of course back then Steve was a string bean with a host of medical problems, and I turn to see he’s falling behind” I can’t see it but I can hear the smile in his voice. “So I turn around, pick him up and start carrying him bridal style!”

I can’t be sure, and it doesn’t seem possible, but it feels like his laughter is helping losses the knots in his shoulder. With no regard for the words coming out of my mouth I say “So your caring, funny, and can carry someone bridal style. Sounds like your gonna make a girl very happy.”

His laughter ceases and it feels like his body goes cold. The sound of whirring gears draws my attention to his metal arm as he lifts his hand and flexes his fingers. “Yeah well most women arnt looking for a partner that’s damaged goods”

I stop massaging the knot in his shoulder and let my fingertips trace up the line of his arm to the cold metal vibranium palm, and I whisper, so quietly only a super soldier could possibly hear me say it. “I don’t think your damaged.”

He relaxes his arm again and a heartbeat later he’s telling me another story about his childhood with captain America. We go on like that for the next half an hour, all the way until my phone buzzes letting me know our time was up. I leave the room to grab him a glass of water and let him get dressed. He comes back out, rolling his shoulder and grinning from ear to ear, drinking the small cup of water in one gulp. Then he waves me goodbye and heads out the door.

~~~

It had been 4 weeks since I had met Bucky and he had been in to see me at least twice a week. Sometimes he would catch me in the halls of the avengers tower, or he would somehow find me on my morning jog, slowing his pace just to get a chance to talk to me.

Then, in the first week of February, I didn’t see him at all. He hadn’t booked any appointments, hadn’t shown up on my run, nothing. Like he had vanished into thin air. As I walked to my studio that morning I contemplated giving him a call just to check up on him. I paused though when I saw Steve Rogers sitting in my office and talking with Ben, an hour before his appointment was set to start.

The minute he saw me he stood up, clearly nervous about something. He asked if we could talk somewhere private so I nodded, leading him back to my studio.

The minute the door closed I piped up “hey uhh how’s Bucky doing?”

Steve’s eyebrows rise but not in a shocked way, more of curious stare. “That’s actually what I came to talk to you about.”

My body goes into full panic mode. “What happened is he ok?”

Steve gently puts his hands on my shoulders, giving me a gentle squeeze. “Relax doll, it’s nothing to panic about. It’s actually umm”

His hesitation only raises my curiosity more.

“Well you know how I mentioned Bucky has PTSD?”

I nod my head, trying to wrap my brain around what he’s saying.

Steve looks down at the ground, removing his hands from my shoulders and fidgeting with his fingers. “Well you see the thing is….he used to have panic attacks pretty regularly but ever since he started coming to you he hasn’t had a single one”

“Wow” I say, trying to throw on my most convincing smile. “That’s wonderful to hear. I’m glad I can help” I pray the slight disappointment isn’t obvious in my voice. “But then how come I haven’t seen him all week?”

Steve becomes even more fidgety, scratching the back of his neck and looking anywhere but my eyes. “So him and I were talking the other night and we had this crazy idea but we both know you probably wouldn’t be into it and it’s a huge leap after knowing you such a short amount of time and-“

“Steve with all due respect if you keep me in suspense like this a moment longer I’m going to explode. Please just spit it out”

Steve audibly gulps but he locks eyes with mine and the next words out of his mouth nearly make my jaw hit the floor.

“We we’re wondering if you would like to be our roommate?”

•••

Y/n after Steve asks you to be there roommate:

#bucky barnes #Bucky #bucky x female reader #bucky barnes x reader #Bucky Barnes x female reader #Steve Rodgers #captain america #winter soldier #marvel #sebastian stan #Chris evans

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babyboibucky · 3 years

Text

Those Days

Pairing: Bucky Barnes x Reader

Summary: You find it hard to love yourself sometimes.

Word Count: 1.1k

Warnings: Insecurity, body image issues, soft smut

A/N: Inspired by @whoth3hellisbucky’s ask about Lights Down Low! This was written terribly lmfao tbh I’m struggling with writer’s block lately. But I’d like to dedicate this to everyone who feels inadequate. We all have those days when we just feel blaaah about ourselves and this is a reminder that you are beautiful the way you are and that loving yourself should always come first 🥰

MAIN MASTERLIST

It was one of those days when you just felt so unattractive and unworthy of everything you have. Staring at your reflection in the mirror made you want to look away and just forget you ever existed. Even the pair of lace undergarments you had on didn't make you feel any better, if any, it made you feel even worse about yourself.

The band of your bra was too tight around your body, it looked unflattering on you. It was supposed to make your breasts look perky underneath the cups but instead, it emphasized how uneven they were. Your underwear was too cheeky, it showed off too much of your stretchmarks and highlighted your cellulites.

Too much skin, you thought. Too much flaws, too much imperfection.

Just too much of you.

You heaved out a deep sigh and put on a loose shirt and a pair of shorts before going back to your shared bedroom with Bucky.

"What are you wearing?" Bucky asked, scanning you from head to toe.

He was leaning against the headboard, his shirt gone and the blankets wrapped around his waist. Looking at him made you feel guilty. Does he deserve you? Do you deserve him? Bucky wasn't just good-looking and physically fit, he was well, perfect. It always made you wonder why he chose you when he could've chosen someone else.

Someone who was just as perfect and beautiful as him.

You let out a forced chuckle, "I normally wear this." you said and slid into the bed beside him.

"No, you don't." Bucky countered. "Especially not when we're about to— "

"Not tonight, Bucky." you mumbled, pressing a kiss on his stubbled cheek before laying down, your back turned to him.

The thought of Bucky making love to you made you want to throw up all of a sudden. And it wasn't because of him, it was because of how you felt unworthy of him and his affection. You felt conscious about Bucky's hands being on your skin. Would he notice the dips on your thighs? Or the roughness of your elbows? What would he feel about your stomach not being flat? Or your hands? They weren't pretty and they were rough.

"Hey..." Bucky said, taking your shoulder in his arm and then turning you to face him.

"Something the matter?" he asked worriedly, his eyes scanning your face for some sort of response.

You sat up and wrapped your arms around yourself, "I don't feel...it's nothing, Bucky. I'm just being dramatic." you said and shook your head.

Bucky hummed and took your chin in between his fingers, tipping your head up so his blue eyes can meet yours. "If it's bothering you this much, it isn't dramatic. Come on, tell me." he urged.

You swallowed and then shrugged, trying to play it cool. "I don't feel pretty enough for you." you simply stated, pursing your lips.

When Bucky didn't respond, you assumed that he was probably judging you. It was such a shallow thought to be worked over. You chortled and shrugged again.

"See? It's no big deal." you said.

Bucky clicked his tongue, "Don't say that." he said and he looked mad.

Why would he be mad?

"I don't like it when you say things like that about yourself." he added. "Have you forgotten that I have a metal arm? And these scars are ugly as fuck but what do you keep on telling me about them?" he asked.

He was onto something and it was bringing tears in your eyes. "Your scars don't define you." you whispered.

Bucky smiled, "You should start telling that to yourself too. You're beautiful, the most beautiful. I really wish you can see that." he said, wiping away the stray tear that escaped from your eye.

You sniffed and laughed, "I'm trying, Bucky. But sometimes I have days like these when I just don't feel...worthy of anything. You know? I feel ugly and every time I see myself I just...I can't even look at myself. I hate seeing my own skin, my own body and I— "

Bucky's lips pressed on yours immediately cut you off. He pulled away slightly, touching your nose with his as his hand went down to tug at your shirt.

"You're perfect, beautiful. I love you, all of you. Let me show you how much." he whispered against your lips before kissing you again, slowly bunching up your shirt and lifting it above your head.

Bucky kissed your forehead and then your nose, followed by both your eyes. "I love how your eyes are expressive, and how they see beauty in almost everything." he said and then kissed your cheek.

"Wish your eyes could see you the way I do. You're perfect." Bucky said.

You'd never felt more loved and secured until that night, when Bucky literally showered you with kisses and touches as he whispered sweet nothings to you.

"I love this neck, love marking it just to show everyone that you're mine and mine alone."

"I love your breasts, your nipples...how responsive they are to me when I touch them." Bucky's lips traced the swell of your breasts as the pad of his fingers ghosted upon your pebbled buds, making you elicit a soft whimper.

His hands traced every part of your body, his lips pressing kisses in its wake. You couldn't think of anything else but the way Bucky was making you feel about yourself as he made love to you. It was slow, sensual and moving.

As his fingers moved against your wetness, moans continued to slip out from your lips. And Bucky urged you to keep going, to keep on making sweet noises because it sounded like music to his ears.

"Love the way you call out my name, love your hands against my skin. I love you." Bucky said, sucking the skin on the inside of your thigh.

"I love your scent, your taste. You're so perfect."

Tears gathered in the corners of your eyes when you felt Bucky's tongue against your folds, slowly but surely. Your vision turned hazy, brain unable to overthink about your insecurities. And when Bucky finally slid into you so carefully, you felt full and not just physically.

Your heart swelled because you felt beautiful. Bucky was making you feel that way, like you deserved this.

Like you deserved him.

And when both you and Bucky reached your peaks and came crashing down, all you could think about was how perfect he was for you.

And how perfect you were for him.

It would take time for you to see yourself like this, but for Bucky you'll keep on trying. Maybe tomorrow you'd hate yourself again and maybe it will last longer than the usual. Ugly days will always come to mock you and make you question your worth. You will doubt yourself but at the end of the day, you will always try not to surrender to that.

There will be days when you would find it hard to love yourself, but that's okay. Because Bucky promised that he would keep on loving you until you finally learn to love yourself the way he does.

Everything Bucky Tag List:

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#bbb writes #oneshots: bucky barnes #bucky barnes #bucky #bucky barnes x reader #bucky x reader #bucky barnes x you #bucky x you #bucky barnes smut #bucky smut #bucky barnes angst #bucky angst #bucky barnes fluff #bucky fluff #sebastian stan

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gogolucky13 · 3 years

Text

Metanoia

Summary: In the last stages of his recovery, Bucky goes on a spiritual retreat where he meets you, and finds more of himself along the way. Pairing: Bucky Barnes x f!Reader Word count: ~11k Warnings: Angst. Fluff. Smut (not super explicit). Swearing. Negative self-talk/thoughts. A touch-starved Bucky. Allusions to an abusive relationship and vague mentions to past violence. Brief mention of infertility. (18+ only please). A/N: Oh boy, oh man, okay. So this is my entry for @bonkywobble’s follower challenge. Congrats on the milestone, love!! My prompt was Metanoia (n.) the journey of changing one’s mind, heart, self, or way of life. This got kind of long, but there was a lot I wanted/needed to include and there’s probably so much more I could include. The timeline fits after CA:CW/before IW. Tbh, I’m a bit nervous to share this, and I just hope it reads how I intended it to. I’ve never gone on anything described in the story so most references are what I read on google or just made up to fit the plot. Also, a special thank you to @please-buckme who is always willing to answer my questions 😬 and dividers by the talented @firefly-graphics! Anyways, I hope people like this. Enjoy! 😊💜 gif not mine.

Day 1 (Arrival):

The first thing Bucky notices when he steps off the plane is its hot. Not the type of hot that has your skin sticking in uncomfortable places, or the kind that brings so much humidity it’s stuffy and difficult to breath. It’s just...hot. He doesn’t mind much, though. The warmth is welcomed after so many years on ice. Besides, he’s spent the last several weeks adjusting to tropical climate in Wakanda, so he’s used to it for the most part.

The second thing Bucky notices is his right arm is beginning to cramp from carrying his luggage on one side. The heaviness of his duffel bag on his shoulder and the suitcase in his hand creates an ache that has him stopping to readjust the baggage to even out the weight distribution. He’s been out of cryo for a little bit, but he’s still learning how to get on with only one arm.

After he came out of cryo, he was offered a replacement arm for the one that was damaged, but he declined. Too many bad memories resonated in his mind whenever he looked at the thing or thought of it. To him, it was never a part of his body, it wasn’t an arm—it was a weapon. He figured it better to just not have one at all, even if it does make things a little trickier. And of course, there are fleeting moments of self-consciousness. Is he seen as weaker? Less attractive? Will people only see a missing part of him and nothing else? He’s still working through those thoughts, too.

Finally, the last thing Bucky notices is this place is fucking beautiful. He stands for a moment outside the resort lobby, gazing at the luscious greenery and colorful flowers, taking it all in. He’s seen exotic landscape before in Wakanda, but there’s just something different about being somewhere completely new and experiencing it for the first time. He loves it.

When he finally steps into the hotel, Bucky is met with a wave of cold air, and the little hairs that have fallen out of his bun swirl around into his face. Before he can move further into the lobby, he has to stop and push the strands away. A sign then catches his eye and it creates a little stir of excitement mixed with uncertainty in his stomach.

Welcome to Metanoia in beautiful Costa Rica! Your journey awaits you...

A spiritual retreat to Costa Rica was the last step in his recovery. His mind has been reset, he’s sorted through most of his metaphorical baggage with his therapist—baggage that’s a lot heavier and creates a bigger ache in his heart and mind than what he is currently dealing with—and he’s reached the final step in moving forward with his new life.

Taking a steadying breath, Bucky decides it’s time to start this journey and heads towards the check-in desk.

“Hello, welcome to Metanoia,” the petite blonde behind the counter greets.

She wears a smile that matches her perky attitude, and it brings a small sense of ease to Bucky’s nerves. The people here are nice, not that he had any reason to believe they wouldn’t be, but it’s comforting to know it’s true. He notices her quick glance to his left side though, which has him leaning further onto his right arm in an attempt to hide the emptiness that’s there.

“Uh, hi,” Bucky awkwardly replies, clearing his throat before continuing, “Uh, I’m checking in for the weeklong retreat,” a slight furrow to his brow and another throat clear because no shit, dumbass, everyone checking in at this place is here for the retreat. He could still use some more practice interacting with people, he supposes.

“Wonderful!” The blonde replies, not at all phased by the obviousness of his statement. “I’ll just need your last name, then.”

Her smile stretches across her face and Bucky thinks she has the whitest teeth he’s ever seen.

“Barnes.”

“Great, thank you,” she says, turning her attention to the computer screen before her.

The sound of keyboard clicks fills the space between them while Bucky waits for her to finish confirming his reservation.

“Alright, Mr. Barnes,” she begins, pulling out a series of papers and pamphlets, “here is your room key. You’ll be staying in the southwest side of the resort, which means you’ll have an amazing view of the sunset each night.” She pauses to give him a smile, which he returns because that does sound nice.

Next she pulls out the pamphlet and opens it up. “And here is some information on what you can expect during your stay, including activities and a schedule for group meetings and workshops. There’s a Welcome mixer planned for tonight where you’ll get a chance to meet everyone.”

Bucky takes a moment, glancing at all the paperwork before he begins folding it up to stuff into a side pocket of his duffle.

“Okay, great. Thank you.”

Just as he reaches for his suitcase to head towards his room, the woman speaks again.

“Oh, Mr. Barnes,” she calls, bringing Bucky’s attention back to her. “During your stay, we ask that you leave any electronic devices with the front desk. Without the distraction, it allows our guests to fully immerse themselves in following their journey.”

“I, uh, I don’t have a phone,” he bashfully admits, giving the woman a weak smile. He was too caught up in his recovery to bother with getting himself one. Besides, he doesn’t see the need, and is still a bit resistant to embracing every part of the 21st century. One step at a time.

“Okay, well, never mind then,” the blonde replies. “I hope you enjoy your stay.”

One more toothy grin from the front desk woman and Bucky is finally on his way to begin the last step in his journey of changing his mindset for the better.

The interior of the hotel is just as mesmerizing as the outside, which causes Bucky to get distracted and he ends up turned around a handful of times on the way to his room. But eventually, he’s walking up to a door with an iron 302 on it. His shoulder throbs in excited anticipation to be freed from his heavy duffle as he inserts the room key.

White. Everything is white Bucky sees when he steps inside. There’s a few pop of bright colors sprinkled around the room in the form of abstract art on the walls, but other than that it’s white. He sighs, dropping his suitcase and duffle bag onto the tiled floor then collapses backwards onto the queen sized bed.

A million thoughts run through Bucky’s mind as he gazes at the palm tree inspired ceiling fan. The faux wooden leaves of the slowly spinning blades holds his attention, the repetition of it helping to calm the last little bit of anxiety that’s lingering.

Everything will be fine. This will be good.

Bucky sits up and reaches for the welcome and information packet to learn more about what he can expect for the upcoming week. His therapist gave him some information, but it was mostly selling points about how great it will be for his recovery. He still isn’t entirely sure of what he’s going to be doing while he’s here.

Curious blue eyes scan over the various pictures in the pamphlet. They’re all of happy, almost too happy, people doing things such as yoga, horseback riding, scuba diving. Bucky doesn’t think he’ll be doing any of that. Then he finds the schedule for the week. A crease in his brow forms when he realizes the only things that are on it is the welcome mixer and the mandatory workshops. Everything else is up to guest’s choice.

Interesting.

Another sigh as Bucky sets aside the paperwork, his gaze shifting to the view of the ocean outside his room. He has a private patio, and he mentally takes a note to make sure he sits out and enjoys the sunset one night before he leaves. A shower calls for him, deciding he should probably wash off the sweat and germs from traveling, making sure he looks somewhat presentable before meeting everyone else.

The welcome mixer is outside, on the beach, because of course it would be when you’re in Costa Rica. Bucky didn’t think that through when he got dressed and wishes he would’ve just come barefoot as he dredges through the sand in his boots. Why the fuck did he bring boots to Costa Rica anyways?

“You must be Mr. Barnes!” A middle-aged man with dark hair greets as Bucky approaches the slowly forming group.

“Uh, yeah,” Bucky replies, running a sweaty palm over his jeans. “But, uh, Bucky, you can call me Bucky.”

“Well, welcome, Bucky, I’m Gerard,” the man holds a hand out and Bucky takes it. “Come, we’ve got drinks and food. I’ll introduce you to some friends.”

Bucky allows the man, Gerard, to place a gentle hand on his shoulder as he’s guided to the rest of the group. He meets a few instructors and counselors, and mingles with a handful of people who are also here for their own journey. He indulges in some fruity non-alcoholic drinks, enjoys some Costa Rican appetizers, and allows himself to relax.

At one point during the mixer, Gerard makes a point to address and welcome the whole group.

“Thank you all so much for coming,” he says, arms open wide with a warm smile on his face. “We are so happy to have you here, and to have the chance to help you in whatever journey brought you to us. During your stay, we encourage you to take the opportunity to try something new. Push yourself to do something you may not normally do, and put yourself out there—we’re here to catch you.”

Bucky listens intently, and his mind wonders back to the brochure he held earlier, the pictures of people doing yoga and horseback riding flashing in his mind. He takes a sip of his drink as he scans the faces of everyone in the crowd, curious what excursions they initially turned their noses up at.

“I’m sure you’ve all had the chance to review your schedule for the week,” Gerard states, bringing Bucky’s attention back to him, “and I’m also sure you’ve noticed it’s pretty much blank. This is intentional, because here at Metanoia we want you to choose what you think your journey is. What will bring you happiness? What will push you just that little bit out of your comfort zone, and open the doors you’ve been keeping shut? You choose your journey.”

The last bit of Gerard’s speech lingers with Bucky as he makes his way back to his room for the night. He doesn’t have a clue what his journey is. He’s here because it was strongly suggested he come and experience whatever this place is. Maybe in the morning he’ll know what his journey is.

That hope stays with Bucky as he shuts the light off and crawls into bed.

Day 2:

The wish of morning bringing a small respite from the heat quickly fades when Bucky steps out to grab some breakfast. He slept well, better than he has been, but his mind still worked in overdrive. Worrying him with a bunch of what ifs and could bes with what’s to come. The biggest worry of all, though, is not finding out what his journey is. What things should he do to try and find resolution? If he never discovers what his journey is, how can he finish it? How can he finish his recovery?

It was while he brushed his teeth he determined he wasn’t going to worry about it anymore. He’ll let whatever happens happen and just pray everything works out. That’s a good plan, and one he sticks with as he walks into the dining room of the hotel.

More white Bucky sees as he looks around at the tables and chairs. The far wall is all windows, allowing the bright sun to make all the white in the room look even more white. It’s so bright he has to squint while he looks for a table. He finds an empty one in a corner, and he knows he should be putting himself out there, but it’s only day two. He’s got all week to do that.

Eggs and bacon sounds delicious, but so does pancakes and a parfait. Bucky makes several trips to the food stations, trying to balance as much as he can with one hand, before finally settling into his seat. It’s when he realizes he forgot to grab silverware that he spots you.

He stands from his chair, but is frozen in place as he catches sight of you. Gliding, you move with an air of confidence and exuberance that Bucky can feel from across the room. The woman at the front desk had a bright smile, but it’s nothing in comparison to the one you flash in the direction of a server.

Stunning.

A distant sounding cough breaks Bucky from his trance. Blinking several times and creasing his brow in confusion, he focuses on an old man he met last night, Henry.

“Mornin’, son,” Henry says, “mind if I join you?”

“Oh, uh, sure, yeah, of course,” Bucky stammers, attempting to shift some of the plates around to make room for Henry’s food. “I need silverware, you need anything?”

“No thanks, I’m all good,” he replies, and Bucky watches as he sits in the chair across from him before lifting his gaze to find you again. It’s a lost cause as more people file into the room, your enthralling figure no where to be found.

After breakfast, Bucky decides to head back to his room for a bit. The intrigue of you has now overtaken his thoughts, and the worry of figuring out his journey is forgotten. He rummages through the papers he was given yesterday, looking for the form filled with pictures of counselors and instructors. Unsurprisingly, he doesn’t find you.

He barely registered anything when he noticed you, but he’s certain you weren’t in a hotel uniform, and you aren’t listed on the brochure, so that means only one thing—you’re also here as a guest.

Quickly, Bucky reaches for the schedule of events. There’s a mandatory meditation workshop and a final group meeting at the end of the week, but what if he doesn’t see you there? You weren’t at the mixer last night, and Bucky would definitely remember if you were.

Lower lip catching between his teeth, Bucky scans the activities for tomorrow.

8am: Yoga for uncertainty: Begin, believe, trust, heal.

It’s not something he would normally participate in, but the title alone tells Bucky he should reconsider, regardless if there’s a chance he’ll see you there or not.

Walking out onto his patio, Bucky still holds the list of activities for the week. As he sits on a chair, gaze falling to the majestic waves of the ocean, he concedes.

Yoga it is.

Day 3:

This was a bad idea. Even with the hope of seeing you again, Bucky is instantly regretting his decision to come to this yoga class. Standing like an awkward giant, he clutches a mat under his arm and watches as people file in.

Is the title ‘Yoga for uncertainty’ derived from the fact it will induce uncertainty when you attend, or is it meant to squelch the overall feeling of uncertainty? Because right now, Bucky is thinking it’s the former.

Finally following everyone else’s lead, Bucky moves further into the room and slowly unrolls his mat. He’s grateful he decided to put his hair up in his room before he arrived. No one wants to see what he has to do to put it into a bun with one arm.

Oh shit.

A self-conscious hand comes to rest on his left shoulder as his blue eyes widen with worry. How the hell is he supposed to do yoga with one arm? Bucky’s certain he’s seen positions where people are balancing on their heads, using two arms to keep themselves straight. It sounds ridiculous, but sometimes he forgets he only has one arm. Never having to worry about what he can and can’t do, or what adaptations he’d need until recently.

Shit, fuck, shit, fuck.

He drags his right hand down his face before it moves to rub the back of his neck. Eyes darting around the room, watching, as he decides his next move. He’ll just casually walk out, no need to draw attention. Anyways, Bucky doesn’t even see you so he has no reason to stay. He’s getting water, no, going to the bathroom. Just as long as he acts natural no one will notice…

“Good morning, everyone!”

Dammit.

The instructor cheerily greets everyone as he makes his way to the front of the room.

“Thank you all so much for deciding to come to my yoga session. My name is Jeremiah, and my goal this morning is to help your body, mind, and soul achieve a level of peace.”

Jeremiah looks around the room with warm brown eyes, clearly taking in the different body types of everyone who has chosen to attend.

“This class is meant to ease uncertainty, bring a balance between the three sectors of our being, so for anyone who is worried, let me just say this class is a beginner’s yoga class. We are all here to succeed.”

A small sigh of relief pushes from Bucky’s lungs. Maybe if he had read the brochure a bit closer before attending, he wouldn’t have gotten so worked up over nothing.

Beginner’s yoga, he nods to himself in reassurance, that should be easy.

Fifteen minutes in and Bucky is realizing beginner’s yoga isn’t as easy as he initially thought. Okay, so he’s able to do most of the poses, but it’s the holding of said pose and focusing on his breathing that is not so easy. He’s never had to think so much about what his body is doing, it just does what he wants it to.

Or it did what other people wanted it to.

As he shifts into Warrior II position, Bucky knows he should be worrying about keeping his breathing even; however, he’s tempted to take a quick glance around the room. It’s mostly women, he’s one of three men who came, but that doesn’t bother him.

Then his gaze travels towards the back of the room, and suddenly any attempt at keeping his breathes steady is lost entirely. Heart rate increasing, Bucky tries to hide the audible hitch in his breathing when he sees you. His attention swiftly moves back to the front of the room, almost losing his balance in the small shift of his equilibrium.

Taking a moment, Bucky closes his eyes and uses the sound of the relaxing music to calm himself. Harp and… are those wind chimes? The instructor then directs everyone to sit down on their mats, and the pull to look to you again is too strong.

He catches your attention, and oh shit now you’re smiling at him. A small wave of panic rushes through him because you’re still looking at him and he hasn’t acknowledged you, yet.

Stop being fucking weird.

Bucky finally manages a smile, awkward but friendly enough, and nods his head. Then he focuses his attention forward and decides not to look in that direction of the room unless he absolutely has to.

When the class ends, Bucky takes his time rolling up his mat and putting his shoes back on. The brightness of your aura is seen from his peripheral, and a few times he couldn’t help but glance at you. Eventually, everyone is mostly gone and Bucky is able to retreat back to his room for a shower and a pep talk.

Day 4:

Bucky knows it’s probably a little creepy. He knows he shouldn’t have eavesdropped on you at breakfast, but when he overheard your plans for today, he decided they would be his plans, too. Okay, maybe it was more than a little creepy, but he’s intrigued by you and still learning how to get to know people. A for effort?

Pacing in his room, the newfound fluttering in his stomach begins to intensify as the clock ticks nearer to 10am. First on today’s agenda—hot stone massage. In theory, it does sound nice, but the thought of someone touching him was enough to make his skin crawl and nausea to swirl in his stomach. Bucky didn’t even consider getting one after initially reading about them until he was unknowingly persuaded to rethink it.

There’s no denying he’s nervous, for several reasons, but the excitement of getting to see you again helps to convince him he should go through with it. Maybe he’ll talk to you if he sees you, but what would he even say?

Hi, nice to meet you. You’re downward facing dog looked amazing.

Nope, definitely not that. Although, true.

Frustration begins to seep in and a groan rumbles in his chest. Why can’t he just be normal?

Admittedly, he hasn’t had many opportunities to talk to different people over the last several years, so the idea of flirting with someone should induce the nervous energy he’s feeling. But its times like these when Bucky desperately wishes he could remember how easy it was for him to talk to people before. More often than not, he was the guy with two dames at his side, dancing the night away. Happy and carefree. Yet the mere thought of talking to a beautiful woman now has his insides twisting and mind racing.

Not to mention the arm, or lack there of.

Another groan and Bucky collapses into a chair. Mindlessly rubbing at the nub where his left arm used to be, his thoughts don’t get the chance to spiral any more because the clock on the wall tells him it’s time to go.

Not white. This room is not white Bucky quickly notices when he steps into the spa. Oak paneling covers the walls, warm uplighting illuminates the space, and there are plants everywhere. Calming music similar to what he heard in the yoga class plays through the overhead speakers, and the tranquil ambiance is doing its job until he spots you.

Feet catching on the floor, he slightly trips before catching himself and awkwardly checking in at the front desk. Then, he silently makes his way over to the waiting area where you sit flipping through a magazine.

The tall stature of Bucky’s figure is hard to overlook so it’s no surprise your eyes are moving from the glossy page in front of you to Bucky’s approaching figure. Meanwhile, all he can think about is don’t trip, don’t trip, don’t trip.

A smile. You give him a smile. Probably the kindest smile Bucky has ever seen, and he’s mesmerized by the way it brightens your features.

“Hi.”

Oh, your voice is so much sweeter when it’s directed at him.

This time, Bucky is a lot quicker to return your smile when he takes a seat across from you. Clearing his throat, he rubs a sweaty palm over his thigh in an attempt to keep his nerves in check.

“Hi.”

Silence falls between you then, and Bucky isn’t sure if he should say something else or just let that be the extent of the interaction. But then you make up his mind for him, and he’s mindful to keep himself focused on what you’re saying because he quickly finds he could easily get lost in the way your lips move around your words.

“You were at yoga yesterday, right?”

Another throat clear, because apparently Bucky is worried his voice will do something funny if he doesn’t make sure there isn’t anything in it before talking.

“Yeah, yeah, I was.” He nods, his hand still continuously rubbing along his thigh.

“What did you think?”

It’s brief, but Bucky doesn’t miss the glance to his missing left arm as you wait for him to respond. Darting his gaze to the floor, he self-consciously brings his right hand to rub at the back of his neck. Obviously, Bucky knew you would notice what’s not there, but this is foreign territory for him. Still learning how to navigate interactions with new people who aren’t familiar with his backstory. Or maybe you are, he doesn’t know.

“Uh, it was good,” he nods again, palm still soothingly rubbing at his neck. “Never done yoga before.” Finally, he brings his right hand to rest back in his lap.

A chuckle falls from your lips. Not mocking or condescending, almost in understanding of his confession.

“Me either,” you reply, “but you could’ve fooled me. Your downward facing dog was amazing.”

Shooting him a playful wink, Bucky chokes on air. A bashful heat takes over his body, creeping up his neck and tinting his cheeks. Are you flirting with him?

“I…uh, thanks, I guess,” he replies with a forced laugh.

Now you’re smirking at him. The fluttering in his stomach returns, but the longer he holds your gaze, he doesn’t feel on edge. Calm and collected, Bucky unintentionally responds to your energy and he’s easing out of this slightly flustered state.

“What’s your name?” You question, folding the magazine closed, full attention now on him.

“Bucky.”

Lips pursing while you consider it. “It’s nice to meet you, Bucky. I’m Y/n.”

The name bounces around in his head. Dizzying and magnificent, it’s his new favorite word.

“Nice to meet you.”

“What are you doing after this?”

The question catches him off-guard. Eyes widening and mouth falling slightly open, he quickly tries to process you want to know what he’s doing.

“Um, I don’t… I don’t know.”

“Wanna go to the beach later?”

Internally he’s freaking the fuck out, but he manages to keep his composure for the most part, attempting an air of nonchalance in his response.

“Yeah, yes,” he replies with a nod. And another nod and another and another.

No, stop it, too much nodding.

He shifts in his seat and subconsciously clears his throat again. “Yeah, that sounds good.”

“Alright, cool.”

The voice of someone calling your name steals both of your attention. Standing from your chair, you toss the magazine back onto the coffee table between you.

“Meet you in the lobby at one?”

Nodding once more, this time with the appropriate amount of enthusiasm, Bucky smiles up at you. “That sounds great.”

You leave him with one last smile, and it’s the only thing Bucky can think about for the rest of the morning.

__________

The massage wasn’t terrible, better than he expected actually. Despite the tender touches though, Bucky still found himself flinching a few times throughout. But then his body and mind succumbed to the effects, limbs melting and relaxing into the table. He could say it was the soft music or the deep pressure, but it probably mostly had to do with the image of your smile when he closed his eyes. It was nice.

The rest of his morning dragged on. Time seemingly slowed down on purpose knowing he was anxious to be in your presence again. But then one c’clock finally rolled around, and Bucky has never rushed so fast to be somewhere unknown with so many unfamiliar people before.

The air is hot and the sun bright. A gentle breeze blowing off the ocean helps to cool his skin even more as he sits under the umbrella with you. He’s thankful the resort’s beach provides chaise lounges to sit on, he isn’t too keen on the thought of getting sand all over his body.

“So, where’s your room?” You ask, glancing to Bucky and holding a hand up to shield your eyes from the brightness.

“Down that way,” he replies, gesturing to the right with his drink. It’s in a coconut with a little pink umbrella and he feels a little silly drinking out of it, but it seems to be the only way to get a drink at this place.

“Wait, your room faces the ocean?”

He nods as he takes a sip of his drink.

You scoff, dropping your hand to your lap with a gentle slap. “Well, that’s not fucking fair.”

For some reason, Bucky feels a smile beginning to pull at the corners of his lips. “What isn’t?”

“You get a beautiful view of the ocean and all I get to look at are some trees,” you reply, gesticulating towards the ocean as you speak. “Not to mention, there’s this annoying bird that lives right outside my window.” Pausing, you look to him with slight annoyance. “My alarm clock the past three mornings.” You finish with an eye roll to sell your point.

Bucky is laughing now. He’s laughing and he doesn’t remember the last time he’s genuinely laughed at something.

“I guess I shouldn’t mention the sunset view then?”

“Sunset?! Oh my god!” Your head falls back against the cushion of the lounger and Bucky takes a quick moment to appreciate your profile. “I guess when you show up late you get put into a less desirable room.”

“Why were you?” Bucky asks before he can even register what’s coming out of his mouth. “Late, I mean.” Voice dropping as he adds the last bit, then he’s thinking maybe he shouldn’t have asked that. It could be too personal of a reason. “It’s…I just, there was a welcome thing the first night, and…”

He watches you take a sip of your drink, lips curling upwards while you watch him stammer out a response. The nonchalance of your body language tells him he didn’t overstep and soon is voice fades until he just stops talking.

“Work,” you finally say, smile lingering. “I was late because of work. I didn’t get in until late Monday night so I missed the welcome mixer.” A beat passes before you add, “Wishing I was there?”

He’s silent for a moment as he considers your question. Coy smirk teasing at the corners of your lips, a glint in your eye that has his heart rate picking up just that little bit.

“Maybe I do.”

Where the fuck did that come from?

Is this flirting? Is he flirting? This feels like flirting.

The smile on your face widens, clearly enjoying the small glimpse of who Bucky thinks he was in his past life—charmingly confident and playfully witty, a flirtatious quip always at the ready. And it stirs something inside him that’s been locked away for decades. He likes this feeling. It’s exhilarating and refreshing, and he wants more of it.

This time, Bucky takes the lead.

“So, what are we doing tomorrow?”

Day 5:

Horseback riding gets added to the list of things Bucky didn’t think he would be doing while he was here. But when you suggested trying it out, he couldn’t find a good enough reason to say no.

Initially hesitant and anxious, the horse, Trudy, seemed to sense this. She was a little rigid, unwilling to follow Bucky’s lead and had put up small fights along the way. He could feel himself getting worked up, ready to call it quits until you assured him with a kind smile relax, it’s going to be okay. Having no choice but to believe you, he pulled himself together and soon found a steady rhythm he and Trudy liked.

Then, the ride came to an end and Bucky wasn’t quite ready to say goodbye for the day. The prospect of rejection was pushed to the very back of his mind, not an ounce of hesitation when he proposed have dinner with me?

A suggestion to have dinner in his room was met with an eager acceptance of his offer, followed by a playful excuse of only wanting to see the view of the sunset. Bucky knew that wasn’t the only reason you agreed to dinner with him, but even if it was, he’s not so sure he cares.

Room service arrives while he’s anxiously pacing around his room. He got your order before parting earlier, and Bucky has just enough time to set up the meals outside on the patio before there’s a gentle knock to his door.

Guiding you to the patio, Bucky is sure to point out the setting sun over the ocean.

“Wow,” you breathe, gaze fixated on the fiery sky before you. “You get to see this every night?”

“Yeah,” Bucky replies a little sheepishly.

“Lucky bastard.”

You give him a playful smirk, one Bucky returns, and then you’re both sitting down to eat.

Bucky ordered pasta. It sounded good, but more importantly, it’s easy to eat with one hand. No worrying about how he’ll manage to gracefully cut his food, allowing him to focus entirely on you.

“Y’know, I wasn’t actually gonna come on this trip,” you say, peaking up from your meal briefly.

Bucky is slightly startled by your confession, fork hanging in the air. “Really? Why?”

“Mm,” you hum, attention fully on your meal as you cut up a piece of chicken. “Well, my therapist said it would be good for me, so I booked the trip, but then I don’t know. I’ve done one of these before, and after, I just ended up right back where I started. I guess the more I thought about it, I didn’t see the point in going on another one.”

“What was the other one like?”

“Nothing like this.” You smile at him, but he can see a hidden sadness in the depths of your eyes. It makes him hurt on the inside.

The intrigue you create has him wanting to understand everything about you. What brought you here? Is your past just as sorrowfully colorful and depressing as his?

“What was so bad about where you were before? I mean, before the trip. You said...”

“We all have our demons, don’t we?” You look to him, smile fading and a seriousness taking over your features. “A past we wish we could forget?”

They’re not really questions you’re looking for answers to, Bucky can sense. And it seems by the knowing look on your face, you have some knowledge about how much truth he finds in those questions.

“I was in a bad relationship,” you continue in a low voice. “Really bad, for years. It messed with my head and I had a hard time getting out, but eventually I did. And I’ve still got some things I’m working on because of it, but I’m doing better.” There’s another smile on your lips, still small, but more assured this time, silently conveying you are doing better. “I know it’s no comparison to what you’ve been through...”

Bucky is quiet. Processing your words and putting himself in your shoes, but he doesn’t really have to, does he? For years he had been in a tumultuous relationship, used and abused, by a terrible, horrific organization. The difference in severities of his situation versus your situation don’t matter, neither should’ve ever happened.

“It’s still wrong,” he says softly.

You nod in understanding, letting your gaze fall back to your food, but then you’re looking back to Bucky when he speaks again.

“I’m glad you changed your mind.”

Day 6:

Today, Bucky learns it wasn’t so dumb he brought boots to Costa Rica after all. After breakfast, you had asked him to join you for a hike to a waterfall, and that’s all it took for Bucky to agree.

The trail is a satisfying challenge through the lush Costa Rican forest. Unsurprisingly it’s hot, sweat building over his entire body, but the promise of a cool swim at the end helps Bucky to push forward. Not to mention the view he has of you as he follows from behind. He’s a little ashamed to admit it, but he’s also only human.

A clearing up ahead and the sound of gushing water tells Bucky the waterfall is close. As he steps through the tree line, the air nearly catches in his lungs when he’s met with the full view of it. Majestic and enchanting, it’s like a painting come to life, and he has to pause for a moment to just take it all in.

“It’s so beautiful,” you say, voice a distant sound to Bucky over the roaring of the falls and his own thoughts.

“Yeah,” he agrees with a soft sigh of disbelief.

Something in Bucky’s peripheral catches his attention—you, taking off your backpack then removing your shirt. He quickly looks away, embarrassment flushing his cheeks and raising his body temperature even more, but his eyes naturally trail back to your figure.

The bikini top you wear leaves little to the imagination, and Bucky suddenly doesn’t know what to do with himself. He knows he should probably look away, he wants to look away, but seeing you nearly bare and moving around before him is just as mesmerizing as the waterfall. Then his mind finally catches up with what you’re doing, and it has his brow creasing in confusion.

“Um, what are you doing?” He asks, standing motionless a few yards away as he watches you rub what looks to be mud all over your arms and legs.

“It’s volcanic ash mud,” you reply matter-of-factly, like it’s the most obvious thing in the world.

“Uh, okay...”

He remains where he stands, continuing to silently observe you scoop globs of mud from a large hole in the ground.

“One of the packets said mud baths detoxify and rid the body of impurities,” you explain, not looking up from what you’re doing.

Bucky hums in acknowledgment, still not entirely convinced he understands the science behind it.

“Would you mind?” You ask, gesturing to your back as you hold up a handful of the almost black sludge.

Taken slightly aback at your request, Bucky’s eyes widen in surprise and he fumbles for a response. “Uh…yeah…sure, yes.”

“Thanks,” you smile

Slowly, Bucky makes his way over to you. A steadying breath passes through his lips as he steps up to you, and soon the waterfall is forgotten when he watches you turn around to reveal your other side. The skin of your back is smooth, begging to be touched, and Bucky gets lost in the idea of it, frozen in place as his mind tries to register what he’s about to do.

Sure, he’s become comfortable in your company over the past few days, but this is new. Apart from the massage, Bucky can’t remember the last time he shared physical contact with another person. A handshake? Sure. Maybe a hug? Okay. But that was usually with Steve and Steve doesn’t count. The last time Bucky willingly touched another person? Not just a handshake or a brief hug? Well, that’s an even more distant memory than the time he spent all his train money to buy hot dogs at Rockaway Beach with Steve.

“Everything okay?” You softly giggle, glancing over your shoulder at him.

Blinking a few times, he clears his throat to respond. “Yeah, yes.”

Hand shaking and heart racing, Bucky tries his best to hide the nervousness radiating from his being by quickly bringing a glob of mud to your back and spreading it around swiftly. There’s a few times where he lets the touch of his fingers linger around the base of your neck, the cusp of your shoulder, or the bend of your waist. It takes way longer than it should for Bucky to coat your back, but you don’t seem to mind.

“Okay, done,” he finally mumbles, taking a step away from you, gaze falling to the ground below.

When you turn around, you give him another smile in thanks, but it quickly fades when you register his expression.

Anxious, nervous, even more so than just a few seconds ago, because what if you expect him to take his shirt off now, too? He’s been to the beach with you, but he was able to stay covered up, only sitting together on the chairs and never going for a swim.

The rise and fall of his chest picks up, crescent moons form in his palm as he clenches his fist, vision tunneling—Bucky easily recognizes what this is. It’s been a while since he’s had a panic attack, and fuck he was doing so well.

“Bucky...”

He doesn’t hear it right away.

“Bucky...”

A few more times until finally he hears it. His name, soft and warm, falling from your lips and pulling him from his thoughts.

“Sorry.” He reluctantly meets your concerned gaze, but it’s painted in so much understanding it helps to release some of the tension in his chest.

“You don’t have to apologize,” you gently assure. “You also don’t have to do anything you don’t want to do.”

A small smile graces your lips, coaxing a relieved sigh from Bucky. But then he’s looking to the ground again, this time not in fear, but in determination. He’s been trying new things all week, why stop now? You haven’t given him the slightest bit of indication you’re put off by the fact he only has one arm, so why should he worry so much if you see him shirtless?

The scars.

So many scars. Red and angry reminders of where he’s been, what he’s done. The darkness and violence of his past reflected in the cracked and broken skin. They aren’t pretty to look at, that’s why he worries so much.

Fuck it.

With one final deep breath, Bucky looks to you for a brief moment, jaw clenching as he builds up the courage, and then he does it. He reaches behind his neck, grabs a fistful of his shirt by the collar, and swiftly pulls it over his head.

Instantly, his eyes lock with yours. Chest heaving in anticipation as he waits for the rejection. Waits for you to just say it already—disgusting, foul, put your fucking shirt back on.

But it doesn’t come.

Instead, you stare almost in amazement at his form. Like you feel so honored and privileged he’s trusted you enough to make himself so vulnerable with you. Tears reflect in your eyes, and he can’t stop his own from welling up because in this moment, he’s never felt so free.

After several quiet minutes, maybe it’s only seconds, he’s not entirely sure, your voice finally fractures the silence.

“God, you’re fucking hot,” you laugh, a small cry breaking through as a few tears fall.

Bucky laughs, too. In relief, in gratitude, in confidence.

“Thanks,” he chuckles, bringing his hand to rub at the back of his neck.

“Want some mud?”

He joins you by the mud hole, turning around to give you access to coat his back. The delicate touches of your hands on his body are no comparison to the hot stone massage. This feeling has him easily relaxing and relishing in the tenderness of being touched by another person again.

But as you draw closer to his left shoulder, he instinctively sucks in a breath, body going unintentionally rigid. Your ministrations stop when you feel the tension in his back.

“Is this okay? I don’t want—”

“No, it’s fine,” Bucky promptly replies, taking another deep breath. “It’s just... I haven’t been... It’s okay.”

It is okay, but Bucky can tell you aren’t entirely convinced just yet, as your hand still lingers a bit from his shoulder.

“It’s okay,” he says again with a bit more certainty, turning his head to the side and seeing you nod from his peripheral.

You work in silence as you carefully rub the dark, grainy substance over his shoulder, and down to where his arm used to be.

“I’ve seen you look at it, y’know,” Bucky finally says, his head still turned to the side. “Why haven’t you asked?”

“It’s not my question to ask,” you answer honestly. “Anyways, do you think it would make a difference if I knew the answer?”

“I don’t... I don’t know.”

You stop what you’re doing and nudge him to turn around to face you. Steel blue eyes meet the intense gaze you give him before you respond.

“If I thought it would make a difference, I wouldn’t be here,” you answer simply. “I’ve only known you for a few days, but you have so much to offer, Bucky. This,” you gesture to his missing limb, “means nothing. And if you ever meet someone who thinks otherwise... Well, I don’t think you should be around them, anyways.”

Bucky doesn’t know what to say. He stands in stunned silence, your words resonating inside his mind and tearing down almost every insecurity he’s ever had. He hopes he can hold onto this even after he leaves this place.

“C’mon,” you say, grabbing his hand and pulling him behind you. “We’re gonna jump off the top of that waterfall.”

“Is that safe?”

“Guess we’ll find out.” You turn to give him a playful smirk before letting go and beginning the climb to the top.

It’s a fairly easy climb. There’s plenty of sturdy rocks and holes for him to keep his footing and hoist himself up. It doesn’t take more than five minutes to reach the top, and what a view it is from up here. Standing shoulder to shoulder, Bucky doesn’t know where to look first. From the intense flow of water to the thick greenery of trees and plants, it’s just as surreal from the top, maybe more so, than from down below.

“Oh, this is higher than I thought.”

Bucky looks to you, a smile curling his lips as he registers the traces of regret and uncertainty crinkling your features.

“Nun uh,” he says with a soft chuckle. “You dragged me up here. We’re jumping off.”

He nods his head in reassurance when you turn to him, holding his hand out for you to take.

“We’ll do it together.”

Silently, you place your hand in his and he grips it like his life depends on it.

“Ready?” One last look to you before he begins the countdown. “1...2...3!”

Pushing off the rock, Bucky propels forward, his hand never letting go of yours as you both free fall to the pool below. It’s not until he feels the impact of water that he finally releases your hand. Breaking through the surface, he catches his breath, shaking his hair out of his face and he laughs. The exhilaration and adrenaline coursing through his body has him losing control, and he’s in a fit of giggles with you.

“That was incredible!” You exclaim as you manage to catch your breath.

Bucky doesn’t respond. He’s still laughing to himself, but it slowly begins to die when he catches a glimpse of you and the look in your eye. As you swim closer to him, the beating of his heart picks up. A new surge of adrenaline flows through his body not caused from jumping off a cliff.

Two arms snake over his neck first. Then Bucky feels your legs around his waist, and his right arm wraps around your back to bring your body into his. It’s happening before Bucky can even process it. His lips on yours. Your lips on his. A kiss so full of desperation and passion, shared between two people who hardly know anything about one another, but who know just enough. Even with your body weighing him down in the water, Bucky has never felt lighter.

So caught up in the moment, he doesn’t get the chance to worry if he still remembers how to kiss. If he’s good at it, what he should do with his hand, with his tongue. His body responds how he thinks it should, and he just gets to be here in this moment with you.

Eventually, someone pulls back for air. Bucky thinks it might’ve been you because he’s certain he could kiss you forever.

“Sorry, I didn’t mean—“

“No,” Bucky nearly pants. “No.”

He pulls you back into him, lips crashing onto yours for another searing kiss, cutting off his voice and any other thoughts you may have about it because there is no need for an apology.

The hike back to the resort takes a little longer, the incessant urge to stop and kiss along the way hard to resist. And as it comes into view, Bucky is desperate to ride out this high for as long as he can.

“Stay with me tonight?” He asks, a glint of hope flashing in his bright blue eyes.

You smile at him, a sense of relief emanating from you because he’s reciprocating the same feelings.

“Of course.”

You come to him later that night, once you’ve both showered and changed, and Bucky doesn’t hesitate to pull you in for yet another kiss. It was only an hour, maybe two, since he last saw you, but it was too much time, too long to be a part. His lips tingled the entire time as he waited to feel yours again.

And when you climb into bed together, it isn’t sexual or provocative. He holds you close and you curl into his side, a quiet comfort and understanding this is all that’s needed in this moment.

Day 7:

A soft kiss to his cheek, then another, then another, trailing up his jawline. The faint brush of tender lips to the shell of his ear stirs Bucky from his deep sleep.

“Wake up, sleepyhead,” you whisper, “or we’re gonna miss it.”

“Miss what?” The words come out grainy, voice rumbling deep in his chest as his body fights off the last remnants of sleep.

“The turtles!” You softly exclaim with a giggle. “They’re hatching today. You really didn’t read the brochures, did you?”

“Guess I didn’t need to,” he yawns, eyes still closed as sleep continues to tempt him. “What time is it?”

“Four.”

That pulls Bucky out of his dazed state. “In the morning?!”

“No, the evening,” you laugh with a playful eye roll. “Yes, the morning. Now get up and get ready!”

With little room for argument, Bucky begrudgingly gets out of bed to put some shoes on. Luckily, the turtle hatching isn’t far from his room, and it’s a short walk down the beach. A small group of people have already gathered, apparently four am is just a little bit too early for most people. It is for Bucky, too, but it doesn’t bother him what time it is. When you ask him to do something, he’s there.

The first cracks in the sand appear and everyone goes silent for a moment. Hushed whisperings of awe begin to pick up as one tiny head and a flipper push through. Not too long after the first one, a second head, then a third, and soon there’s a small army of tiny baby sea turtles pouring out of a hole. Instinctively they begin their journey towards the ocean, crawling and pushing forward against any obstacle.

Bucky watches in astonishment. The beginnings of new life, innocent and pure, not yet tainted by the harsh and cruel realities of the world. To be here and witness such an amazing cycle, it’s incredible and overwhelming. It has Bucky thinking about himself, about this journey he isn’t sure he’s quite figured out just yet, understanding he still has time. Time to start over and begin anew.

His vision blurs and he doesn’t realize he’s crying until he senses your hand slipping into his. A gentle squeeze brings him back down to earth and he blinks away a few tears.

“Thank you,” he whispers, squeezing your hand in return, eyes still on the scene before him.

You don’t say anything. You don’t have to. Instead, Bucky feels you bring yourself closer to him, sliding your other hand up his arm and resting your head on his shoulder.

The rest of the day is spent doing whatever sounds interesting together. Breakfast in Bucky’s room, lounging on the beach, a walk around the resort. At one point, Bucky spots a small group of monkeys and he drags you over to watch them eat some fruit.

Try as he might, Bucky can only live in ignorant bliss for so long, though. Too often his mind pulls him from these happy moments with you to remind him this is it. This is the last day he has with you. He tries to not let that fact sour the mood, and he’s continuously putting on a smile for you. Forced and slightly sad, it’s almost the same as yours when you return it.

As the night draws nearer, he becomes restless and anxious, even more so than he has been all day. There’s something about the receding warmth and light from the sun that creates an incessant reminder of tomorrow and what’s to come.

But tonight, he’s putting on a brave face and enjoying the final moments he has with you here. The farewell gathering, complete with a bonfire and music, is the last scheduled event for the trip. He silently gets ready in his room, impatiently waiting for you to come to him.

Giving himself another once over in the mirror by the bathroom, a gentle knock pulls his attention to the door, and he opens it not even a second later. Something told Bucky to bring at least one nice shirt when he packed for this trip, and he’s glad he did. Its just a simple white button up and a pair of jeans, but when he sees the look you give him? He feels like a man worth all the money in the world.

And he’s sure the look he gives you is no different. A sundress, colorful and airy, drapes over your body and flows with your movements. It fits you in the best way possible and Bucky can only stare in disbelief at your effortless beauty. He pulls you in for a kiss before taking your hand in his, leading the way out.

The bonfire comes into view, and it almost reminds Bucky of that first night, except this time, he’s decided to go barefoot and he hasn’t come alone. A group has already formed, a small band is playing live music while drinks and appetizers are being passed around. It’s a night of reflections and staying open to possibilities.

Not too long after arriving, Gerard is calling for everyone’s attention, a final thank you and goodbye for coming.

“We hope you’ve been able to learn something new about yourself, or allowed yourself the chance to see things differently, try new things while you were here. We wish you well on your journey, and hope you’ve found what you were looking for.”

The words resonant with Bucky as he considers them for a moment. He had been so caught up in you he forgot to figure out what his journey was. But then he thinks, maybe it was never just one, obvious thing; one clear idea. He’s tried new things, put himself out there, and he feels almost born again. Looking at the world through a different lens than when he arrived. The world is still scary, yes, but if he knows there are more people in it like you, he thinks he’ll be okay.

He brings the back of your hand to his lips, placing a chaste kiss to the soft skin. You smile then, and he smiles, too. Feels it crinkling the corners of his eyes and stretching across his face—genuine and full of content. He could live in this moment forever.

Still holding onto your hand, Bucky doesn’t want to let it go, but he feels you both being pulled apart, getting swept up into conversations with other people met throughout the week. As Bucky sits beside Henry, he barely registers anything the older gentleman is saying. Catching snippets here and there, however, most of his attention is on you. Gaze rarely faltering, he watches you talk and laugh with another woman. And he doesn’t miss the glances you make in his direction, either.

The band shifts to play a new song, and you’re dismissing yourself from the woman and walking towards him with a coy smirk on your face. He can read you like a book, and before he can protest, you’re reaching for his hand. Bucky feigns reluctance as he excuses himself from the conversation with Henry, allowing you to pull him up for a dance.

It’s been awhile since he’s danced. Let his body do whatever it wanted and move to the rhythm of the music. He nearly forgot how much he loves it.

He twirls you, spins and sways with you, and Bucky is losing himself in the moment. Laughter falls from your lips, and it’s the only song he ever wants to dance to. The fire flickers across your features, illuminating the color of your eyes and brightening your smile. And then he feels it.

A want begins to build within, burning hotter than any flame. Acting on pure instinct, Bucky brings you into him, hand on your jaw, his lips catching yours. The want quickly turns into something more, something he hasn’t felt in a long time. And when he pulls away, the lust reflecting in your eyes tells him it’s the same for you, too. It lights a renewed fire inside him, lowering his inhibitions and making him feel alive.

Grabbing you by the hand, Bucky stumbles with you through the sand back to his room. Both drunk on each other and the anticipation of what’s to come. The moment the door closes, he pins you against the wall. A fervent kiss to your lips that quickly deepens, tongues interlacing with one another. Bucky’s hand is on your jaw, your neck, trailing down to your waist as you unbutton his shirt.

He’s desperate for this. Desperate to remember what it’s like to be this way with another person again. It’s been so long he’s forgotten how intense this feeling is—so powerful and unrelenting.

Bucky senses you’re right there with him. It shows in the needy touches, the quiet moans between kisses. Then, his hand splays on the wall above your head, grounding himself in hopes of not passing out as you undo his jeans and reach inside.

It’s difficult for Bucky to feel where his body is in space, a whimper falling from his lips as his head rolls back, dizzy and overwhelmed. Only a few slow pumps of your hand has him grabbing your wrist to stop before catching your lips in another eager kiss.

“I need it,” he pants. “I need you.”

Guiding him to the bed, clothes falling to the floor along the way, Bucky follows your lead. He’s feeling bold, yes, but this is all still essentially new to him. Pulling him down on top of you, Bucky quickly settles in the space between your legs, hovering over you he hesitates as a brief realization of what’s happening hits.

“Is this okay?”

“Yes,” you reply with a kiss, “more than okay.”

“I don’t... This is...” he struggles to explain what he’s thinking. He hasn’t don’t this in a while, but he’s still aware of the consequences and precautions. Finally, he just blurts it out. “I’m clean, but I don’t have any protection.”

Stopping the assault on his neck, you pull back, eyes scanning over his features. Heartache and appreciation swirls with the desire that clouds them.

“I’m clean, too,” you say, voice trailing before you continue lowly, “and I can’t...get pregnant.”

He understands it now. The way you looked at him when he exposed himself to you at the waterfall, because he feels it, too. Sharing something so personal and sensitive, he hopes it’s as liberating for you as it was for him.

A kiss, one full of respect and promise, as he leans down on his elbow and he slides into you. Slowly pushing in to give you both the chance to adjust, his lips never leave yours. It’s exhilarating and all consuming when he’s fully inside, eyes dampening and body shuddering at the indescribable pleasure. After several timid movements, he’s able to pick up a steady rhythm, gaining a newfound confidence with each thrust and mewl that falls from your pretty lips.

Then there’s a push from your hips and hands to his shoulder, and he’s taking the hint. Thankful for his super human strength, he’s easily able to shift positions and pull you on top with one arm. From this angle, Bucky is dumbfounded as he looks up to you. He’s accepted this new life with only one arm, but fuck if he doesn’t wish he had two in this moment. Hand trailing up your thigh, over the curve of your hip, to the swell of your breasts, anywhere he can reach.

“You’re so beautiful,” he whispers, blue eyes shining in the moonlight.

Heavy pants, broken whimpers, and soft words of encouragement pass between heady kisses. Fingertips pressing hard into your waist as your bodies work together, and he can feel you begin to tremble, fluttering around him. The fire within reaches unimaginable heights, burning flames of pleasure up his spine and alighting his entire body in euphoria. Pushing into you one last time, hips stalling and flush against yours, he wraps his arm tightly around your waist to keep you as close as possible. He finishes with a low, satisfied grunt deep in his chest.

It takes several still moments full of steadying breaths and hard swallows before he’s coming to. Your eyes, bright and elated, shine down at him, and Bucky pulls you in for one final kiss.

The moon lowers in the sky, the threat of tomorrow creeping closer and closer, and Bucky finds it difficult to fall asleep. Apparently you do, too. Holding each other close, silently waiting for the inevitable between brief moments of light slumber and lasting kisses.

Day 8 (Departure):

Morning comes much too soon, and it takes Bucky a moment to realize he isn’t in a dream. Bodies pressed together, bare and vulnerable, just as the two of you were last night. He takes a slow breath through his nose, the warm exhale causing you to stir against him. It encourages him to place a tender kiss to your shoulder, reveling in the feel of your soft skin against his lips again and again and again.

He could get used to waking up this way, he thinks. Tangled in sheets and warm limbs, but then cold, harsh reality seeps in—the trip is over. In a few short hours, you’ll both be on separate planes, back to your own lives.

A heavy silence lingers as you lounge with him in bed, stealing kisses and occasionally adjusting the hold you have on one another. Neither wanting to acknowledge the painful farewell that’s on the horizon, but then the clock is screaming it’s time.

Wordlessly, he packs his suitcase, folded shirts and precious memories stuffed inside together. After, he walks with you back to your room, quietly sitting as you do the same. The air becomes too thick, constricting his throat and Bucky is finding it harder and harder to look at you; a first since meeting you.

Now, standing in the lobby with you in an attempt to push off the inevitable that little bit more, he briefly thinks how he found it so beautiful when he arrived, now it’s the ugliest thing he’s ever seen.

Your shuttle arrives first. Awkwardly standing together for a moment, neither wanting to be the first to seal this fate. Bucky feels a mix of emotions taking over—sadness it’s over, happiness it happened, and gratefulness he gets to leave with everything you’ve given him. Holding your gaze with a weak smile, he pulls you in for a final kiss goodbye.

“Thank you,” he whispers, forehead resting against yours, “for everything.” He cups your jaw, thumb running soothing strokes along your slightly damp cheek.

“I’m really happy I met you, Bucky,” you softly say.

“I’m so happy I met you.”

Reluctantly, Bucky lets you go then. He watches you reach for your suitcase and head for the exit, and suddenly a bout of anxiety swirls in his chest as a painful realization hits.

“Wait!” He calls, instantly getting your attention. You look to him expectantly, waiting for him to continue. “I don’t... I don’t have a way to contact you.”

For once, he’s cursing himself for not having a phone. Why did he think he didn’t need one again? He wants to be able to reach out to you once he’s settled back home, but he also wants to assure you what happened last night isn’t a regular thing for him, and it meant a lot.

It doesn’t paint the best picture—sleeping with someone on the last night of a trip, any confusing thoughts or feelings never having to be dealt with knowing the next day you’ll be far away. That wasn’t his intention, and he’s definitely not that type of guy. He’s almost certain you know it’s not that way, but regardless, he’d really like to be able to talk with you again.

There’s a pause as you consider his words, gaze holding his before responding.

“It’s okay,” you say with a smile and watery eyes. “I’m sure we’ll find each other again.”

It’s not truly comforting, but there’s something in the way you say it that has Bucky believing it’s true. You give him one last smile, one he is sure to ingrain in his memory, before you turn to leave. As he watches you pass through the sliding doors, Bucky catches sight of something—a sign. Reading it silently to himself, it stirs that same bit of excitement and uncertainty in him the first time he saw it, but now, it’s welcomed and embraced because he’s ready.

Welcome to Metanoia in beautiful Costa Rica! Your journey awaits you...

#bucky barnes x reader #bucky barnes x y/n #bucky barnes x you #bucky barnes #bucky x reader #bucky x y/n #bonkyshalfwayto1k #bucky barnes angst #bucky barnes fluff #bucky barnes smut

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