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butididntpourthewhiskeys · 2 years

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Christmasbound IX

“It’s got a beautiful french balcony by the bedroom. And also, check out these floors, babe. Oh my god so beautiful.” she says excitedly, with that same excited smile on her face as always when she can’t contain her feelings in front of him. She holds her phone down to show him everything she’s just talked about over Facetime, giving him a good view of what she’s seeing at this moment. He’s just comfortably sitting in his hotel room on the other side of the world, smiles at her excitement with some sleep in his eyes and a blanket up to his chest.

“The area is actually quite good, too.” he adds, as Taylor already continues to march through the big empty room, until she has reached the hallway where Elizabeth is standing, also taking pictures with her phone from where she stands.

“Look, this would be her room then.” Taylor says then in a more serious voice, filming the big and bright room with the massive window sills that open up the space to the grand backyard. Nothing but green grass and pine trees and another Victorian balcony, that offers a majestic view over the entire outside property. A certain kind of light and life filling this room that she envisions for the very first sensory experiences of her child. Big trees, lots of light, lots of space to run and grow and let your fantasy run wild. She certainly can envision to raise her here. Just the three of them here. Not to forget, also adding the three furry babies that will take over the place quicker than them.

“So you’re telling me she’s getting the master bedroom? Not fair.”

Taylor just gives him an annoyed look, can already hear his mother laughing over his comment behind her.

“I’m joking.” Joe laughs, “It’s perfect. But that balcony there gives me some anxiety.”

“That’s what your mom said, too.” Taylor sighs, can’t believe how many things you have to think of when becoming parents. The first thing that came to Elizabeth’s mind when viewing this house, was the accessible balcony with the big holes in the rails that would make it easy for a crawling child to simply fall through.

“But look, you can always get those changed.” Elizabeth already says, shows Taylor that the parapet is only placed on top of the flooring. She’s right. They could simply change the way this rail is built and make it baby friendly.

“I don’t know if we’d want to be under construction again for a while though. Because if we change this one, we’ll have to change the other ones in the house too.” Taylor just sighs, looking from Elizabeth back at Joe. He smirks through the screen. She’s a lot more irritable ever since she’s pregnant. Everything seems to be more complicated for her all of the sudden. Things that she took lightheartedly are suddenly serious matters. It’s interesting what hormones can do for your mind. The worried look on her face almost makes him laugh.

“We don’t have to make a decision yet. This is not something we should rush, Tay.”

She looks back at the screen and nods. As so often, he’s right. Elizabeth agreeing with her son as well. She sighs. As much as she knows that he’s right, she wants nothing more than to finally find the right place for their growing family. It’s true that their townhouse is big enough for a baby. But the truth is that she’s always had this fantasy. This fantasy of her daughter making her very first memories in the same house as her siblings will one day. It shouldn’t just be a house they buy. It’s a forever home. A home for Joe and her and their family. Somewhere, they will live in for more than just a couple of years. A place where birthdays will be celebrated, first steps, first day of schools, graduation and even sending your kids off to college. A house that is a lifetime.

“I know.” she sighs, looks at him with a sad look on her face, but the blonde man with the handsome beard just grins silently.

“You look tired, crazy lady.”

“I took a nap earlier.”

“Good. Have you eaten?”

Taylor sighs again, suddenly feels a second set of eyes on her. Aside from Joe who looks at her through the screen, Elizabeth now looks at her daughter in law with a concerned look as well. She almost has to laugh. She’s surrounded by overtly worried Alwyns these days.

“I was a bit sick this morning but I had some oatmeal before we left.”

“Isn’t it almost evening in London?” he asks through the screen. Before Taylor can answer, she already feels a set of hands on her back, right over her black coat gently stroking her up and down over the warm fabric.

“It is and she’s coming over to dinner with me.” Elizabeth says, has now already held her head into the FaceTime camera. Joe just gives his mum a thumbs up and it makes Taylor laugh.

“Not necessary. I still have take out from last night at home and…”

“No way you’re eating that crap. I will make you whatever you like, my darling.” Elizabeth says, her hand still gently on Taylor’s back. Taylor just looks back at Joe and shrugs her shoulders.

“Did you hear that?” she asks with a smirk.

“I did. And I agree with my mother.”

“She loves me more than she loves you at this point.”

Elizabeth starts laughing out loud, already focused on her own phone while replying to a message from Patrick on WhatsApp.

“She does. And again, I have to agree with it.” Joe smiles at the blonde woman laughing into the camera. God how much he misses that smile. What he would give to be able to kiss these lips, hug her small frame and give that little belly all the kisses it deserves.

“Stop! I was joking.” she giggles into the camera, hasn’t failed to notice his gentle smile while still standing in the empty big room of this massive London villa.

“Miss you. Both of you.”

Taylor’s laugh now turns into a gentle smile. Butterflies in her belly fly again. She just stares at her phone screen for a second too long though, slowly feels this deep sadness overcome the butterflies in her belly. It’s unbearable these days to not have him with her. Perhaps that’s why she ends up spending so much time with his family? As if they could replace the feeling of home she gets from being with him. As if they represent a piece of Joe she’s longing for so much.

“I miss you, too. So much. Just fifteen days now.” she says, feels herself getting emotional over the thought that it’s still more than two weeks until he’s home. Half a month. Half a month more that he misses of her pregnancy. Half a month more of her having to go through this emotional and physical roller coaster all by herself.

“Will pass a lot faster than you think.” Joe says, has seen the look on her face clearly. It kills him to be apart. It never has been this hard on him. Especially because for the first time, he can see how hard it actually is on her.

“I’ll call you when I’m home later, okay?” she says, definitely longs for a longer conversation with him.

“Of course. And listen to my mother.”

She rolls her eyes again for once, then presses a big kiss onto her iPhone camera.

“I love you.”

_______________

In a violent manner, her alarm goes off. The horrific sound in both set of ears now, right through the dark of this room. Within a split second, Joe opens his eyes. Just long enough to realize that it’s still dark outside. He immediately groans, just rolls closer to the woman in bed next to him. He doesn’t fully comprehend why her phone is making these loud noises, but what he does notice is her curly long hair right in front of his nose and the fact that her naked upper arm is a bit cold. She must’ve not been properly tucked into the sheets as she usually is. Joe’s warm hand begins to stroke her skin up and down for a few seconds, enjoys the thought of him warming her up. Something that was once so natural to him. Something he wants to do for the rest of his life, because it brings him so much peace. Even though this horrific sound of her alarm, in the middle of the night when in fact it’s the holidays, drives him insane.

“What..” he just moans with eyes closed, half asleep, half groaning into the fabric of her sleeping shirt. His left arm protectively looking for her hips now.

“I have to get up.” she lets out exhaustedly, without moving. He still doesn’t understand. For a second, Joe opens his eyes again, looks over her shoulder in confusion.

“Why?” he asks again, can feel the woman next to him stir slowly. She struggles to move her body, clearly. Instead of getting up, she’s now calmly on her back, her hand tiredly over his, which casually landed on her stomach a few seconds ago. Her eyes are closed and Joe knows that she fights with her urge to continue sleeping, just like he does.

“I’m Santa Claus. Remember? Eleanor. Downstairs.” she mumbles, eyes still gently closed, but the soft hand on his makes Joe smirk tiredly. Even though she does not seem to be able to speak in full sentences yet, he knows what she means. And how could he forget? It’s Christmas morning. He gently gets closer to her again, lays his head down on her pillow as well and presses a tired kiss onto her soft cheek.

“t’s too early.” he mumbles into her cheek. Taylor moans in an almost painful manner, then shakes her head and quickly begins to move, knowing damn well that she will fall asleep in his warm arms again if she doesn’t fight this urge in her. She slowly sits up, her naked feet dangling down her boxspring bed for a second. She truly feels as if a train has just run over her. She reaches for her phone on the night stand. Five in the morning. Five in the morning, in winter, in the dark, in the cold, in England, on Christmas day. A rather unromantic evolvement of the Christmas holidays, that only parents can understand.

“She will wake up in half an hour and run downstairs. You know her.” Taylor mumbles, almost feels as if she is saying these motivating words to herself, because the man in her bed has gone quiet again. She can’t help but grin silently through the dark as she can find him lay there in peace, both eyes closed again and his hand still reaching for her thigh. She slowly lets her feet glide into her soft slippers, then quickly gets up to leave the bedroom quietly. Joe deserves his sleep. Carefully, she closes the door.

“Oh, for fucks sake. You’re… crazy.”

Taylor quickly turns around, finds Joe standing in the doorway. His hair in all directions, his body covered in his boxershorts and the white tee he always sleeps in. She has to laugh quietly at him whilst sitting on her carpet, still arranging presents under the massive Christmas tree. His blue eyes are tiny and puffy, and he’s barefoot as well. She doesn’t have to look at him for long to understand that he’s absolutely tired.

“Morning, I didn’t expect you to join me.” she smiles happily. She’s still in her sleep wear like him, a hot cup of coffee next to her while taking the tinsel out of the box next to her. She loves adding some more glitter and decoration on top of the presents under the tree. She loves to make it seem like Santa Claus has not just brought a bunch of presents - but instead has spread his magic in form of red and green glitter on top of the entire tree in this living room.

“Five in the morning and it’s Winter Wonderland in here.” Joe mumbles, a bit more grumpy than he usually is. He closes the door to the hallway carefully and tries his best to be as quiet as he can be. After all, he doesn’t want Eleanor to wake up just yet.

“There’s coffee on the counter.” Taylor says, can already see in his puffy face how happy he becomes in an instant, having heard these words escape her mouth.

“Thank god.” he mumbles, already on his way to pour himself a nice hot cup of coffee. It’s the least he needs for being awake at this ungodly hour. While taking that first, hot, incredible sip he looks outside the big window sills. The sky outside is still pitch black. Only the snow glistening and reflecting in the big windows right by the winter garden of this house. He knows that this is just part of being parents, and after all, he was the one talking Taylor into prepping the living room in the morning instead of last night. It was his idea. He wanted more time with her in bed last night and that’s why they’re awake now. However, he can’t really believe he managed to actually get out of bed, to not let her deal with all of this by herself.

After all, this time, things will be different. They already are.

“Merry Christmas, babe.”

He suddenly feels two arms wrapped around his torso, which makes him smile in an instant. He slowly places his mug on the marble counter in front of him, then slowly turns around to find her standing in front of him, both arms still around him, and a tired smile on her face. Joe’s arms automatically wander around her and he can’t help but brush her bangs off her face. With his hands on her head, he just stands there, taking a good look at her her bare face with a smile. It’s been a while.

“Merry Christmas.” he whispers back, in a way more intimate way than he’s ever said these two words to someone. With her tired smile and the little pimple on her chin, she just lets him hold her like this, doesn’t shy away from simply looking into his eyes. Eyes she knows so well.

Joe doesn’t have to ask to understand that she longs for him to kiss her. Her eyes wandering back and forth from his lips, as he can feel her get on her tiptoes already. Even before his lips finally meet hers, Taylor has already closed her eyes. Joe smiles into the kiss automatically, his hands now gently on her cheeks and her bangs hanging down again in a rather unruly way.

As he pulls back, Joe just smiles at her even more than he did before. He could say so many things to her in this moment, but he knows that he doesn’t need to. His smile says it all. He knows that she knows.

“God, you look so good this morning.” she whispers, making him cackle quietly. Her torso still pressed against his, and both his hands on her face. He loves feeling the soft skin against his fingers. He loves being able to smell her so close to him.

“Would’ve loved to stay in bed with you a bit longer.” Joe says and Taylor sighs, as if she remembers just now that half of the tinsel is still on the floor wrapped up in plastic.

“Can you help me wrap the tinsel around the beams on the ceiling? I’m almost done.” she says with a yawn, quietly agrees with Joe’s previous statement. She wouldn’t mind sleeping again for another hour or two.

“Of course.” he says, only lets go off her with hesitation before taking a last sip from the hot beverage next to him. It’s always that first cup in the morning. Heaven.

Taylor already walks back into the open living space.

“I was thinking, maybe you throw it over and I pull here?” she gestures grandly, is slowly stepping onto the chair in the living room again while holding the decorations up in the air. Joe looks at her, has to smirk quietly. She loves this. She loves decorating the house and playing Santa Claus for their daughter. She can’t convince him otherwise.

“Why don’t you go out of the way and let me do this.” he says, gently places his hands around her hips to signal her to come down from this unsteady chair and let him handle this.

“But..”

“No buts. You can fill the stockings in the meantime.”

Taylor lets him help her down the chair and smiles nodding. It’s been a while since she didn’t have to do this alone. She quietly watches him wrap the tinsel around her wooden beam with what looks like no effort. Taylor smiles quietly while filling the big fabric with chocolate and little wrapped up gifts. Within ten minutes, Joe has successfully hung up the tinsel and even adjusted the fairy lights on the inside of her winter garden. Taylor now closes the box on the floor with a satisfied look and turns her head to look around again. The Christmas tree is filled with a ridiculous amount of presents on the floor, fairy lights and glitter lighting up the room. She’s proud of her end result. Eleanor will love this. She just knows.

“Thanks for helping me. Looks great.”

She can feel Joe wrap his arms around her from behind this time, his face next to hers over her shoulder, looking into the same direction as she just did. She smiles happily, carefully leans back and loves to find herself wrapped in his familiar arms. She takes one last look at the Christmas tree, then slowly closes her eyes for a second. This feeling of safety and love is something she’s been missing for a long long time. His warm, big hands on her stomach, gently tucked under her sleeping shirt now. Memories are coming up. His loving hands on her belly. This is how it was always supposed to be.

“You’re very welcome, my love.” Joe whispers into her ear before kissing the spot on her cheek, right in front of her ear, slowly.

“What do we do now?” he asks then, can see that her eyes are gently closed. She swallows once, then turns her head into his direction, both arms still wrapped around his. Now that her face is closer to his he can shower her closed eyes with a few sweet kisses, just smiles as he sees her lips forming a smile as well.

“Bed. I’m so tired.” she murmurs and he fully agrees with her. That first coffee didn’t help. An hour more of sleep is desperately needed from both sides.

_______________

Taylor opens her eyes, needs a second to remember where she is. But within a split second, she just feels this overwhelming sensation of safety in her bones. The TV in the living room is still running and the same boring episode of Britain’s Got Talent from before is still on. The floor lamp at the end of the room is lid. It’s gone dark outside. She must have fallen asleep on the family sofa while watching the television with Elizabeth. She closes her eyes once again in exhaustion, appreciates the sofa blanket that has been placed over her body.

It’s the weirdest thing in the world. These days, she can just fall asleep anywhere and anytime. As if a deep, deep exhaustion has taken over and almost makes it impossible for her to function as she normally does. Taylor swallows tiredly once, turns her head to the left which results in her curly bangs gently falling off her face. Her hand slowly wanders to her small but prominent belly. It’s still weird for her to feel this bump there all of the sudden. This weird, growing belly that’s slowly but surely getting in the way of her and her favourite jeans. She always thought it would be scary to have a human being living inside of your body. Always imagined pregnancy like a scary Alien-like experience. Another organism taking over. When in fact, it’s quite the opposite. It’s cozy. It’s a weird feeling of warmth and togetherness in her belly. She’s not alone. She doesn’t know this growing human being but what she does know is the fact that she already loves it. And she will love it, probably for as long as she walks this planet.

With her hand gently stroking her belly for a minute, she hears Elizabeth rummaging around the kitchen. Pots that are being moved from counter to stove. The sound of the extractor fan from afar. The most incredible smell in the air. She’s making her favourite dish, Taylor can already tell. Zucchini Pasta.

Sleepy but happy, she turns around again, opens her eyes then a bit more to look at the television again. She never thought it would be possible to feel at home in a family that is not hers, but here she is. Falling asleep on Joe’s family’s sofa in the middle of the afternoon whilst his mom is preparing her dinner. A feeling of gratefulness in her chest. She slowly sits up, rubs her eyes once. If she wouldn’t actively fight the urge, she would fall asleep again. Unbelievable how much she can sleep nowadays.

With one leg hanging down the couch and the other one under her bum she can clearly feel the pressure on her bladder. Just when she was about to get up to make her way to the bathroom is when her eyes suddenly pop wide open. Within a split second, her hands both move to her belly. Her heart starts beating faster. A pretty hurtful, pretty unusual feeling is arising in her belly. Taylor breathes heavy within seconds. This can’t be happening. She’s not even seven months along yet. With shaking hands, she clutches onto her bump, tries to stay calm but fails. Panic arises. Is that why she feels the need to pee suddenly?

“Elizabeth? Can you…can you come over for a second? Please?” she yells all of the sudden, her voice has clearly gotten a lot louder and shaky. Taylor feels herself getting more and more nervous with every second passing by. The weird feeling isn’t going away. A lot of pressure on her stomach that is not going away, even with her hands pressed on her belly. This can’t be happening. This can’t be happening again.

“What’s wrong, darling?” Elizabeth already asks with a worried look on her face, the apron still covering her clothes. But that worried look in the brown-haired woman’s eyes gets even worse when she sees Taylor on the sofa, the telly still running in the background while the blonde woman sits there with tears in her eyes, holding onto her belly as if she was holding onto life.

“Taylor, what…”

“Something is wrong.” she says, her voice almost breaking. Elizabeth can see how her hands are shaking, her face that is pale all of the sudden.

“Something is really wrong, I think I need to see a doctor.” Taylor adds hectically, her chest rising, as Elizabeth has already sat down in front of her, looks at the blonde woman as worried as she does.

“What is it? Are you in pain?” she asks, her hands already securely on Taylor’s belly as well now.

“It’s this.. weird pressure since a few minutes. It’s almost like back then when I had the miscarriage. Can you call a doctor or something?” She says, her eyes already red and watery. Elizabeth just moves her hands on her belly a bit, doesn’t say anything. Then she just starts to smile quietly and looks back at Taylor who doesn’t understand her reaction at all.

“Oh, darling.” she says quietly, the gentlest smile on her lips that Taylor has ever seen. “She’s kicking. Your baby is kicking.”

Taylor looks at her in disbelief, her hand now wandering to the spot on her belly as well where the pressure can be felt the most. She swallows for a second, feels the flutter again. She can’t believe it.

“She’s… she’s kicking? That’s what that was?”

“Yeah, feel this.” Elizabeth smiles, her hand wandering across her small belly.

“Here. It’s her little foot that bothers you.”

Taylor immediately clutches her hands to the spot where Elizabeth hands have just been. She laughs quietly, then feels her eyes getting hot and teary again. A rush of love overcoming her that almost makes her dizzy.

“She’s kicking.” she says again quietly, a first tear escaping her eyes and running down her cheek slowly.

“She’s kicking.”

_______________

“Daddy, I can’t take it off. Can you help me?”

Joe just shares one last look with Taylor, who has to smirk just like him. She slowly takes another sip from her coffee, then watches Joe get up from the breakfast table for the fifth time in the last half hour. It seems that only dad is allowed to help Eleanor with her new toys. Especially when it comes to the miniature clothes she got from Santa Claus for her mini dolls to wear.

“Alright bug, but let us have breakfast after, okay?” he says while crouching down in front of the little girl in her Christmas PJs. He takes a good look at that tiny, happy face, and smiles silently as he focuses on her doll. He fully understands how excited the little girl is about all her new presents. Even though it’s been over an hour now, and he really wants her to eat before she gets dressed to go visit his family today.

“Yes, daddy. Look, the skirt is stuck.” she says, points to the fabric, and almost looks desperate. He can’t help but smirk again. Joe just inspects the screw-in button on the tiny skirt now. Can clearly feel Taylor watching him next to Eleanor under the tree. Still in his boxers and tee, being fully focused on the doll in his hand with the same serious look in his face like his daughter. Taylor has to laugh quietly, then unlocks her phone to take a picture of the two twins.

“You almost got it.” Eleanor cheers on him, just when Joe manages to finally get rid of the doll’s clothing. She smiles at him thankfully and Joe grins at her as well. He slowly leans down to press a kiss on her little curly head and then gets up to sit back down in front of Taylor at the big dining table again. She looks at him with a soft smile, doesn’t have to speak up to tell him how much she enjoys seeing him dress- and undress little dolls for his daughter. Joe smiles back at her, reaches for her hand over the table, strokes the soft skin around her thumb gently. This is how this day is meant to be. Just when Eleanor approaches the dinner table again is when Taylor immediately lets go off his hand, just watches her daughter sit down next to her father again.

“What do you want on your pancake, my love?” Joe asks her already, has just helped her climb onto the chair next to him with her doll still securely in her hand.

“I want chocolate chips and raspberry and honey.” she says with big eyes, making Taylor smile again over the six year old’s decisiveness in her voice.

“Do you want to do it yourself?” she asks, already passes her the bowl of berries as well as the plate with stapled pancakes on it. After all, she knows that Eleanor enjoys making things herself. It’s also good for her to practice these things more often. After all, she’s a school girl now. Not a baby anymore.

“Yes!” she says, confidently grabs a pancake and then reaches for the big spoon full of honey. Joe carefully helps her by holding the plate in front of her. Taylor looks at Joe again in silence. He always claims he’s not good at these parenting things. But the truth is that he’s a natural. Always has been.

“Mommy, are we going to grandma’s today?” Eleanor asks then and looks at her mother with imperious eyes. Taylor knows that she understood clearly that there was a big fight between them last night.

“Do you want to spend the day at grandma’s house? With Patrick and grandpa and Tom and..”

Taylor doesn’t have to finish the sentence because Eleanor already nods enthusiastically while loading her pancake with bananas. Taylor places her mug in front of her, then looks at Joe with an insecure look. She doesn’t know what he wants to do. She understands if he wants to spend the day with his family, too. She would support him in joining Eleanor today if that’s what he wants. But there’s no way she can sit on Elizabeth’s dinner table today. Acting as if the last night hadn’t happened. Acting as if she hadn’t hurt her to the bone with her words last night.

“Well,” Joe starts, his eyes fully focused on Eleanor now. “How would you feel if mummy and I drop you off after breakfast? And you can take your presents and your new turtle bag and have a little sleepover at grandma and grandpa’s house tonight? I’m sure Patrick is responsible for Christmas movie night tonight. And then tomorrow morning, mum and me we come to pick you up and spend Boxing Day together, just the three of us. Together with the cats and more Christmas movies. What do you think?”

Just before Taylor can say something, Eleanor already nods enthusiastically while chewing on her pancake. Taylor looks at her daughter, unsure how to react. Obviously, Joe wants to spend the day alone with her. And as happy and gushy as she feels to know that he does, she doesn’t feel convinced that this is the right thing to do. Leaving Eleanor for Christmas day. Making Joe spend the holidays apart from his family.

“Do you really want to do a sleepover at grandma’s tonight?” Taylor asks carefully, ready to spot any signal in the little face that Eleanor doesn’t want to be separated from her mother today. But to her shock, Eleanor seems excited. A bright smile on her face, before lifting up her arms in excitement.

“Yeeees!” she yells, making Joe and her laugh a bit.

“Daddy, can I bring the big doll house? And the horse garage? Do you think Patrick will make popcorn, too? Maybe we can watch Mary Poppins..”

Taylor looks back at Joe, a slight smile on her face over Eleanor’s excitement, but a lot of insecurity in her eyes as well.

“Joe, if you want you can also stay with your family and..”

He just looks back at her. A hand on Eleanor’s back, who seems to fight with fork and knife to cut her loaded pancake, an ironic smirk on her face, almost as if he was asking her with his eyes if she’s being serious.

“You think I’d prefer to spend the day with my mother instead of..”

He doesn’t have to finish the sentence. Taylor smiles quietly, but also feels a weird ache in her chest. It feels toxic and forbidden, but she’s almost heartbroken that Eleanor is as independent as she is. Doesn’t cry anymore at the thought of spending the night away from home. As much as she’s excited for this alone time with Joe, she’s also already missing her little bubbly daughter.

“Alright then. And what are we two gonna do all day today then?” Taylor asks him, lost in her thoughts again whilst watching Eleanor eat in excitement. She reaches for her hot coffee cup and takes another warm sip.

“Well, I might have an idea or two.” he smirks then, and it takes five seconds for Taylor to understand what he means. She just changes her face to a mad one within a split second, places her coffee cup with a mad undertone on the table again. Not in front of her. Taylor’s face speaks for itself. Joe giggles quietly, steals his daughter a raspberry from her plate.

“I’m serious.” Joe laughs, points at her phone. “I have an idea. Open google maps and look for Rye, East Sussex.”

_______________

“Do you really think this is a good idea?”

Joe, who stands in her closet just laughs quietly before folding one of this black jeans. He turns around to look at Taylor, who’s sitting in her bed again. Her head resting against the bedpost, her macbook on her thighs, wrapped in her white bed sheets again whilst she’s still in her pajamas from before.

“We can also stay here and just have sex all day long. I’d be up for that, too.”

It takes a second and Joe feels a pillow in his back, that she has just thrown at him from where she sits. He laughs as he turns around to look at her again, already sees the strict finger on her lips, signaling him to be careful with his choice of words as long as Eleanor is in the same house.

“It looks beautiful, but.. where are we gonna stay? Also, I’m very sure that everything is closed today and..”

“It’s an adventure, Tay.” he says then, sits down in bed next to her for a second. Taylor still anxiously looks into her laptop, is clearly overthinking all of this again.

“When’s the last time we had some time away. Just you and me.” he smiles at her, already reaching for her hand. Taylor can’t help but smile quietly, loves how Joe kisses the back of her hand once while looking at her.

“It’s been ages.” he says, even though this statement doesn’t answer her previous question.

“Let me find a hotel. If I can’t, we’ll drive back home tonight. It’s just an hour outside of London anyways.” he says confidently, looks at Taylor then for final confirmation. She just nods with a grin on her face. Joe squeezes her hand three times. She hates to admit how much she loves his idea. Instead, just rolls her eyes at him.

“You love it.” he mumbles.

“We will see.” she says, gets up from bed and walks past him barefoot.

“You absolutely love my idea, admit it.”

“Well, if we’re stranded on the outskirts of London tonight with no phone and no hotel and no food, I will get back to you about how awesome this idea was.” she says, has already closed the door to the master bathroom.

“You love it.” he replies again, this time with a big smirk on his face.

_______________

With a drink in his hand Joe stands in this pretty darkened bar, laughing once as one of the film crew members tells the story about a weird encounter he had with a Canadian woman in the lift earlier. He didn’t want to join them tonight, really wasn’t in the mood to go out tonight, right before his flight to Nashville tomorrow. His head is full, extremely full these days. His mind is constantly at home with Taylor and the little bean growing in her belly, that will surely turn his life upside down sooner than he thinks. The incomparable amount of responsibility they’re both just learning to grow into. And on top of that, he got this call from Jeffrey today. This call, that Paul Thomas Anderson wants to work with him on an upcoming project in Ireland. The Paul Thomas Anderson. A once in a lifetime project that he had never even dreamed of being considered for. But instead of being ecstatic about this opportunity, it just gives him a tummy ache. Because he thought he knew what the next six months of his life would look like. The long break he’s been planning for a while now. The long break he was looking forward to to finally take care of his own mental state. The long break to clear his head, be with his baby and to learn how to be a parent. Learn how to be the man he wants to be for the two most important women in his life. Taylor didn’t hesitate for a second to tell him that he needs to accept the offer. That he can make it work. That they can make it work. But it doesn’t make him feel any better. Not at all.

Joe takes a last sip from his glass, can already feel Andrew’s stare on him as he places the empty glass on the counter in front of him, grabs his jacket before giving him a look.

“You leaving already?” he asks into Joe’s ear and the blonde man nods. The live band that is playing in this bar makes it a bit hard to speak in a normal sounding voice.

“Yeah, I want to call Taylor before she goes to bed. Check in on her.”

Andrew nods and smiles, his hand now on his shoulder, patting him with the same smile that his dad always gives him when they talk about this topic. This smile, that only a father can understand.

“When’s her due date again?”

“December.” Joe smiles and Andrew does too.

“It’s the biggest change of your life that’s ahead of you, my friend.” the older actor laughs and Joe nods. He’s heard this quite a few times now but no one can really explain to him what this change will look like.

“Any advice for me? I have never in my life changed a nappy before.” Joe mumbles, is ready to be laughed at by his colleague and friend.

“That’s not what this is about. You’ll grow into that.” Andrew interrupts him with a secure look on his face. “Being a father will come naturally to you, but being in a relationship will get different. Being a good partner when you have a child that needs all your attention every hour of the day is the difficult thing.” he says, a bit more serious than before, now sips from his glass and looks at Joe again. He doesn’t like hearing this, because it already feels like he’s being torn apart in all directions. Even though his daughter is not even born yet.

“And what’s your golden advice then, mate?” he says, cheers once more with the older actor. His gaze falls to the live band again. The singer is a young woman in her twenties. Never did he ever think that he would so soon feel this responsibility. The responsibility for a human being. He already loves this person, even though he’s never met her. That’s out of question. But sometimes he wonders how his life will look like in a few years down the road. How many of his own issues will he pass down to this beautiful, perfect little creature growing in Taylor’s belly? How is he supposed to take care of a helpless human-being when he can barely control his own anxiety sometimes?

“There is no advice. I think… some people make it and some don’t. Sounds dark, I know. But you can’t have it all. I think that’s what I learned. You either have a career or you’ll end up with a house full of kids and two to three mediocre roles a year. You know, if you’re lucky and it happens that way then you’ll have a good income and a good life. I mean… it’s not bad. Not at all. But that’s just the reality that nobody tells you about when you become a dad.”

Joe looks at the forty year old man, with disappointment in his eyes. He’s never experienced Andrew as someone who sees his career as non- existent or subordinated to his family. He’s met Lisa before. Taylor and him have had dinner with the couple during the course of Joe shooting this movie together with him. They’re an incredible family. They live out what Taylor and him aspire for their future. A stable relationship, lots of fun, lots of travels and three incredible children. Joe can’t believe Andrew’s little speech. They seemed…. happy? Is that what it will be like for him as well? Happy on the outside and empty on the inside? Like a shell of the things that you should love whilst you lack purpose underneath?

Joe scratches his neck once, then orders another beer.

_______________

Taylor patiently sits in the quiet car, her feet warmed up in her big black inuikii winter boots, her torso wrapped in the big puff jacket and her green beanie covering her head. Joe has made sure to leave the heating on before leaving the car to drop off Eleanor at his parents house. A weird feeling for her to just stay in this car, acting incredibly busy on her phone and not saying hello to his parents.

Taylor knows that she can’t avoid them forever, and she knows that there has to be a point where they talk. Not just about what happened last night but even more so, what happened three years ago. Three years ago when she had to make the hardest decision of her life. Elizabeth knows only one side of the story, and it almost frightens her to be told what that story actually is.

Within two minutes, she can hear his footsteps on the snow next to the big car and feels a slight relief overcome her. She was worried that Elizabeth would want to talk to her right now, or even worse: approach her while she’s sitting in the car on the street. She knows her mother in law well. She’s stubborn, determined and honest. Sometimes a bit too honest. A similarity that she shares with her also.

Joe opens the doors to the black SUV, and Taylor is relieved when he closes the door again. The cold air from outside was disturbing the warmth coming from the heating.

“All good?” Taylor just asks, not sure whether she means her little daughter who was just dropped off by her father or Joe and the chaos of not being on best terms with his family after last night. Joe shares a look with her, nods then. He doesn’t look thrilled but it seems that nothing else was said that would’ve ruined his mood this morning. He quickly starts the car, then unlocks his seatbelt for a second again to take off his winter jacket.

“You should take off your jacket, you’ll be cold when we arrive.” he says with a concerned look and she nods. He’s right. There’s nothing more uncomfortable than leaving the car and freezing because your body temperature has reached around a dozen degree in the past hour. Just as Joe starts driving and shortly after leaves the little lane leading from his parent’s house to the main road, Taylor has managed to take off her jacket without unbuckling her seatbelt and now sits back relaxed on the passenger seat again, taking a deep breath for once.

“Was she sad?” Taylor asks him, turns her head towards Joe who’s busy driving.

“She literally didn’t even look back. I said ‘Bye Eleanor, I will miss you’ and she just ran off and was like…. ‘Ok bye, dad’.” he says and Taylor has to cackle quietly with him.

“Ouch. She is basically a teenager now.” she says, and Joe nods with a sigh. He stops at a red light, then looks to the side to get a good look of the woman next to him. She’s wearing some make up today, her long hair wavy and covered in her beanie that makes her look absolutely adorable. She’s wearing some chapstick on her lips and it only makes her look fresher than these past days. His hand slowly wanders to her face, and with a smirk on his lips he bops her nose just once, making her giggle for a second.

“At least this means we get some alone time.” he says, and Taylor nods. A smile on her face. A small one but it’s still clearly there.

“Did your mom say anything, or…”

Joe’s smile slowly diminishes as the lights turn green and he continues driving. He takes a deep breath, doesn’t really like talking about this topic.

“She wants to talk to you. And to us. I mean she obviously keeps apologising but I told her not this weekend.”

Taylor nods. That’s a fair answer.

“I feel so bad that you’re spending Christmas away from your family. Not really speaking to them.” she mumbles then and it takes less than a second for Joe to interrupt her.

“Stop saying that. I’m spending the day with you. That’s all I want this year. That’s literally all I wanted for the past ten years.” he says with a confidence in his voice that makes her stomach weak. She takes a deep breath and smiles silently, as she already feels his hand reaching for hers right on her lap. He interlocks their fingers and this time his grip is stronger than usually. This means a lot to her. These days together mean a lot to her. It almost feels like a big shift has happened between them. A band that has been blocking them just ripped apart. Everything is on the table. All the ugliness and the hurt and the fears. And they still want each other. For good.

“I can’t remember the last time we took a day trip together without Eleanor. Do you?” she asks, her mood a lot better already. She looks over at him driving and he smiles too at the thought of it.

“I think it was when you were pregnant. And we got into this huge fight about…”

“Oh right.” she interrupts him, doesn’t really need to revisit this weekend once more. He proposed to her, she freaked out and made it clear to him that she’s not ready. A second time she turned him down. Little did she know just how much she would hurt him back then.

“So what are we gonna do today? You basically didn’t let me do any of the planning for the day so… tell me.” she says all excited for their little spontaneous getaway. Her hand still intertwined with his, her eyes on him who is carefully focused on the road. Everything is white on the outside, thanks to the icy snow on the streets. Aside from that, the weather isn’t necessarily great today. A white grey layer of clouds covering the sky. A classic English winter day.

“I booked us a little cabin. No guarantee that this will be nice but it had good reviews.” he says, already laughing apologetically. “And then I’d say we just.. walk around and go for a hike? Explore nature?” Taylor looks at him and presses her face against the backrest of her car seat. She loves this plan. She loves it a lot.

“Sounds great! But can I please make a request?” she mumbles, has raised her voice a little bit like always when she really wants something from him.

“Coffee. Next exit. I got it.” he says, already knew what she wanted from him. Taylor just laughs for once, then starts playing around with the console of his car, until she finds a sound she likes.

“You know me too well.”

“I do.” he just says, a quiet pause in the air. He often feels like he knows her better than himself. A strange but beautiful dynamic he’s never had with any other human being.

“Listen to this.” she smiles, turns up the music a little bit more. The same Kings of Leon song is playing that they both were obsessed with. Back then, when there was no Eleanor. She remembers very well when her obsession with this song started, knows that it must’ve been around Thanksgiving six years ago.

_______________

“The level of unfairness is unbearable. I’m serious.” Taylor just laughs, looks down at her hot chocolate mug in disappointment. Austin and her cousin Spencer cheer to her once more before taking a sip of her aunt’s delicious eggnog brandy. Andrea, who’s sitting on the sofa right next to her just laughs at her daughter, signaling her to at least try the marshmallow infused hot chocolate in her hand. She knows that her daughter is exaggerating, as always, but she still feels for her. It’s a lot of changes at once.

“Honey, next year. If you want I’ll make you one for Easter even.”

Taylor has to laugh at her aunt trying to soothe her, then takes a sip of the Christmas-y drink in her hand. She has to admit, the sweetness paired with the hot and soothing taste of a melted marshmallow is a great replacement for the liquor based drink she would usually have. Usually, around this time of the year, if there wasn’t a little someone taking up space in her belly and eating her food, too.

Scott slowly gets up from the spot he’s been sitting on at the other side of the family living room, has been discussing with Taylor’s uncle how much the value of their property will increase in the next year down here on the outskirts of Nashville. Her face suddenly wanders to the iPhone screen that is lighting up. She sits upright again, then reaches for the phone from the coffee table. All she can see is her wallpaper that is making her smile every time. Joe with a big smile, cuddling Benjamin close to his chest. Her favourite boys.

‘Be there in half an hour’

Taylor smiles confusedly. Didn’t his plane already arrive an hour ago?

“When’s Joe coming? The Turkey is ready.” Alison says, and Taylor looks up at her. She nods. They wanted to start dinner half an hour ago. She knows that Alison is usually the most relaxed person in the world. But when it comes to her Turkey, she’s getting a lot more serious than one would expect. Taylor wants to answer her, suddenly feels a rather uncomfortable kick in her belly. She places her hand on the spot that aches. Seems like the sugar rush from her hot chocolate has not just woken her up, but also the little kicking monster living inside of her.

“Sorry, he just texted me he’s late. I’m not sure why, but…”

“Maybe his flight was delayed?” Andrea interrupts her, and Taylor nods.

“We can start eating already though. I don’t want to make you all wait.”

“Oh, no way! We can wait for him. Why don’t you all sit down at the table and we will have the appetizers first.” Alison says, has already made her way to the kitchen again to adjust the temperature of her oven, not to burn the Turkey. Taylor grabs her phone, opens the chat with Joe again and starts texting.

‘Everything okay? We’ll start eating the first course now’

She hits send, can clearly see that he read her message already. She patiently waits for him to reply, but nothing. After a minute she puts her phone down, quietly smiles at her family that has just sat down around the round dining room table at her aunt’s house. She slowly gets up, the added weight on her feet noticeable every time. With her belly in front of her, Taylor slowly approaches the table. She loves Thanksgiving. Always has. Candles are lighting up the cozy living room. Alison has prepared the table with lots of autumnal style decorations. It has gone dark outside by now, but the fireplace at the end of the living room is lighting up the room in the warmest way possible.

“Why don’t you sit next to me, honey, and then Joe can sit next to you when he comes.” Alison already signals Taylor to take a seat in front of her. She just smiles, slowly sits down on the chair in front of her. After sitting down she checks her phone once more. No reply. Taylor feels irritated. Usually, Joe always texts back within seconds. Weird. She places her phone next to her, taking a sip from the water glass in front of her.

“I’ll get it.” Alison says with a knowing look on her face, slowly gets up to open the door. Taylor notices the stupid smile creeping up on her face. She’s so happy he’s finally here. She was always happy to see him after being separated for a week or more. But now, since her body is going through this new transition, it’s even nicer to know he’s home after a while. Home with her and her family, safe, soon be sitting down next to her around this warm and cozy dinner table.

It takes less than five seconds and Taylor has slowly gotten up as well, notices immediately that it takes her a tiny little bit longer to get up from the table than it usually does. In her leather boots with a low high heel, she slowly makes her way into the hallway, where Alison is already speaking to Joe. With her long, blonde and tonight slightly wavy hair, Taylor can see his suitcase being placed next to the door. She smiles at the sight, watches him pull back from the hug with Alison. Taylor now full on giggling as she approaches him, too. The kicking in her belly is getting a lot stronger. And she knows why. The butterflies arising in her belly from seeing him haven’t remained unnoticed by the little human living inside of her.

“Someone’s happy for you to be here it seems.” Alison smiles at her niece, who is already approaching the tall man with open arms. She hugs him tightly, feels how cold his jacket is from outside. But what she also notices is a weird smell. She closes her eyes though, knows very well that her sense of smell has been completely out of hand since a few weeks now. She closes her eyes for a second. He’s here.Finally.

“Hello, my love.” he whispers into her ear, right over her hair. She smiles still, doesn’t even notice that Alison is still witnessing the whole scenery. Taylor slowly pulls back and takes a good look at his face. He’s tired. There’s something else in his eyes. Taylor slowly kisses his lips, feels his stubble on her chin. But suddenly, there’s a different sensation she experiences. He tastes like alcohol. Is she going crazy now? Still standing as close to him as physically possible, he doesn’t seem to notice her confused face though. He’s way too focused on her belly already.

“Oh my god, she’s grown. Again.” he just says, as excited as he always is after not having seen her for more than a few days. She finds his excitement endearing, as always, just watches him lower himself in front of her and peppering the softest kisses onto her belly right over the striped wool dress she’s wearing. Taylor’s hand naturally lands on his hair. She strokes the soft short hair up and down until he seems to be done with his loving hello to her belly. This time, she’s kind of glad to have noticed Alison leaving the hallway again to give the two some privacy. Just when he stands upright again is when he notices her face. Joe gives her a confused look back, slowly takes off his jacket and hangs it up right next to the door. He looks handsome, absolutely gorgeous as always. His torso covered in the navy blue Burberry jumper she got him the other day.

“What?”

“Did you have a drink on the plane?”

Joe approaches her again, this time a smirk on his face. He doesn’t say anything, just grins at her, then lowers his head to be able to kiss her neck gently. She knows where his mind is going but she’s not having it.

“Why would you say that?” he asks then, pretends to be insulted all of the sudden.

“You smell like a bar.”

“I don’t.” he just laughs, shakes his head. He can see that she doesn’t like it, but he already places his warm hand in her neck, gets closer to kiss her forehead gently. “I had a drink, yes. Haven’t eaten yet.”

Taylor nods. She doesn’t know why it bothers her that he smells like alcohol. Perhaps because he never smells like this after a glass of wine, or perhaps because this is a Thanksgiving dinner and her entire family is patiently waiting in this living room for him. Him. The man who is getting praised by Taylor like no other. The man who got her pregnant. The boyfriend who has a lot of expectations on his shoulders now that they’re expanding their family.

Joe just smiles at her, his thumb stroking her cheek once.

“You look sexy.” he whispers. She just bites her lower lip, then shakes her head and grants him a look that says it all. She’s getting annoyed, even though he’s as handsome as he mostly is.

“Let’s go eat.”

“I read somewhere that the housing prices in Europe are skyrocketing as well. Didn’t you say that Joe’s family bought a property in Spain last year, Taylor?” Scott asks, was fully deepened into the conversation with Spencer as Taylor just quietly nods. She feels tense. Sitting there at the family table. She can see Joe sipping on his second glass of wine now. He slowly places the glass next to him again, is now trying to eat the baby carrot on his plate with his fork. But instead of pricking into the vegetable, he pricks into the plate. A creaking sound filling the dinner table. She feels embarrassed. Slowly leans back in her chair and takes a look at him. He’s drunk. To say the least. He’s absolutely wasted. Taylor doesn’t dare to look into her mother’s face who is clearly noticing Joe’s behaviour as well.

“Yes, my parents have bought a house in the Málaga region. It’s lovely, but… very expensive.” he says then, trying his best to sound sober. She notices that immediately. His mouth full while speaking. Taylor cannot believe it. She has never witnessed him like this.

“Oh, Málaga is gorgeous I heard.” Alison now says, pretends like Joe is acting normal. Like everyone around this table who doesn’t want to cause a scene or make Taylor uncomfortable. She has no idea why he got drunk on a plane by himself. He likes to drink, yes, has always been a wine lover. But he’s never lost control of himself, has never been careless enough to get this drunk before flying in for a family holiday.

Taylor feels relieved as everyone around the table emerges into another conversation that, this time, doesn’t involve her drunk boyfriend. He slowly turns around to her, grants her a smile with his eyes half closed. His left hand around the back of her chair whilst his other hand is now wandering to her belly. He just smiles at her, seems to be the only one around this table who doesn’t notice how drunk he is. While drawing circles on her belly with his hand, he kisses her temple gently. Taylor can see her mother watching them in the corner of her eye. The amount of explaining she will have to do after this dinner, already makes her mad.

“You look so beautiful.” he says then, obviously intended to whisper this statement into her ear but instead has said it in his normal voice. So loudly, that the entire table is looking at the couple now. Nobody around this table is unaware of the fact that he is intoxicated. Nobody except for Joe himself.

“Do you want some water?” she just replies quietly. She knows that causing a scene now will only embarrass her even more. But Joe looks at her confusedly now, his hand still on her thigh.

“No, why? I’m good.”

Taylor doesn’t say anything, just crosses her arms over her belly and looks away, acting as if she’s part-taking in the conversation around the table again. She can’t dare look at him. She can’t believe he’s acting like this in front of her family. On Thanksgiving. Whilst she is pregnant with his child.

“Okay, who wants dessert?” Alison now smiles into the round, finds Austin, Spencer and Taylor’s youngest cousin Kelly cheering on her aunt. She slowly gets up, just like Andrea does to start cleaning up the table by collecting the plates from main course. To her confusion, Taylor suddenly notices how Joe begins to get up as well, struggles a bit to stable the plates over each other. Obviously.

“Let me help you, Alison.” he says in a thick accent. His English accent always getting especially thick when he’s had a few drinks. Taylor can’t believe it.

“Oh no, don’t worry, Joe. I got it.”

Taylor signals him to sit back down again. He can feel how mad she is, the way she grabs his arm a bit more harsh than per usual.

“What?” he asks then, his head turned to her again. And Taylor sincerely hopes that her cousins are too focused on their conversation to notice this interaction between her and the man by her side. She just looks into his eyes, long and deep and Joe doesn’t say anything further. It hurts. The disappointment in her eyes. The anger. The same damn look he gives himself most days, actually. But seeing it in her eyes hurts him even more. He doesn’t say anything further, just reaches for this glass of wine and takes another sip. He knows he’s a burden. A mess. Not ready for any of this.

_______________

“Okay, that was officially the worst idea I’ve had in a while.”

Taylor can’t help but laugh at him. He’s grumpy. He hates this. She can see it in his eyebrows, and the familiar look in his face.

“No this is beautiful! Look!” she squirms, her demeanor the complete opposite of him. Joe can’t help but smile at the woman in front of him now, who’s standing in the middle of the road. Both hands in the air, obviously loving this moment while dancing in a circle. They’re both walking down Mermaid Street, a tiny old lane that leads through the village centre of Rye. The snow that has stopped falling from the sky a few hours ago has now come back. And not just slightly. It’s falling down heavily. Massive amounts of snowflakes in his face that turn into water quickly. Thank god they’re both wearing winter boots and the thickest jackets they’ve got. Joe looks into her happy face. Her nose is slightly red but she seems fulfilled, closing her eyes once at the sensation of snowflakes on her face. He can’t believe she loves snow this much. Her excitement for these things is still as strong as it was a decade ago when he met her.

“It’s beautiful until the snow’s in your boots. And your jacket.”

“You’re a grumpy old man, you know that?”

He can’t help but laugh at her. She’s not wrong. Instead, she waits for him to catch up with her and happily reaches for his hand. Both of their gloves touching. She likes this. She likes being covered from head to toe while walking through this empty, almost lonely village far away from busy London. These old brick houses make everything even more cozy. And she likes this thought of no one here really caring about them. She likes the thought that she has the whole day ahead with him here. Just Joe and her. With nothing to do on a snowy winter day.

“Let’s go back home.” he says then. She has to giggle again and looks at him. His beard is covered in snow. He really doesn’t look too happy.

“Oh come on, let us enjoy this winter day for a bit longer. We have the entire day left to take a hot bath and fuck in this old cabin.”

He just looks at her speechless for a second. A smirk on his face. She has no filter sometimes.

“Well…The Great Poet Taylor Swift has spoken.”

Taylor giggles again, gets a bit closer to him while walking down the road through the snow. She gushes at him, smiles warmly as she hugs his arm. But instead, Joe slowly lets go off her to be able to place his arm properly around her. She appreciates his gesture. She appreciates it a lot.

“Where are we going by the way?” she mumbles after a while, the snow that falls onto her not really getting less. She is really focused on the ground underneath her now, a bit worried that she might slip and fall as a lot of ice has built up on the old cobble stone street.

“I originally wanted to show you the famous Rye Castle. But.. I’m thinking maybe the pub it is?” he suddenly stops walking and points to the pub at the corner right next to them. As much as Taylor loves to visits national monuments from the thirteenth century - the warm light radiating from this pub looks a lot more like what she needs in this moment. A dry and warm place to recover from the snow. A good drink. Getting rid of her beanie that is fully covered in snow by now.

“Do you think people would..”

Joe slowly looks down at her. He’s not surprised that she’s hesitant.

“It’s Christmas Day. I would be surprised if anyone is even in there.”

Taylor nods. She signals him that they should just take a peak inside. Within fifteen seconds, Joe has opened the door to the old pub and the warmth in Taylor’s face makes her smile instantly. The entire place is being heated up by the fire place at the end of the establishment. Old paintings from what seems to the the thirteenth century are gracing the walls. The wooden floor creaking under her as Joe takes a look around. Jackpot. No other guests seem to be here today.

Taylor smiles happily, as the waiter already signals them to choose any seat they want before wishing them a Merry Christmas. Joe gives her one last look, then already makes his way to the very back of the old pub. Right until they arrive in front of the fireplace, where a dark green couch is placed facing it sideways. A little coffee table in front of them. Heaven.

“Oh my god, this is so nice.” Taylor just says happily, starts to take off her beanie, scarf and winter jacket just like Joe does. Within a few seconds, both winter jackets have been placed at the end of the couch by Joe, and Taylor has already sat down on the couch, her hands facing the fire. As Joe slowly sits down next to her, he has to laugh quietly. Her cheeks are red, her bangs a bit wet from the snow. But her hands seem to have been freezing the most. In slight pain, Taylor is trying to warm them up by holding them close to the warm air coming from the fireplace.

“Cold hands?”

She nods, as Joe already reaches for them, holds both small hands in his to warm these. He looks at her with gentle eyes, leans down to kiss her hands once that he warms so gently.

“Thanks. That’s better.” she whispers. Just in that moment, the waiter approaches them, already places two menus on the coffee table in front of the pair. After a few seconds, Joe places one last kiss on the now lukewarm hands of the blonde woman and reaches for the menu to pass it to her.

“Are you hungry?”

Taylor nods, already studies the menu card in her hands.

“I think I need a hot chocolate and a snack. Should we share some fries?”

“Sharing as in you eat two thirds of it?”

She looks at him, has to laugh already. He remembers how bad she is at sharing her food. And it hasn’t changed in the past years. It really hasn’t.

“You’re mean.” she says amusedly, still studying the food menu on her lap. “Oh my god they have scones with clotted cream and jam.” she says then, her excitement hard to be contained.

“What about we order fries and the scones?”

Joe looks up from the menu a second time today. She knows this look too well. He looks both disgusted and surprised.

“Are you pregnant again? Or should I be concerned?”

Taylor already giggles, closes the menu in her hand and places it in front of her. She’s made a decision.

“Remember the peanut butter sandwiches?”

Joe can’t help but laugh with her. How could he forget? Back when Taylor was pregnant with Eleanor he spent his days making her peanut butter sandwiches. Because for whatever reason, wheat bread (wheat toast with seeds specifically) and creamy peanut butter were the only nutrients she could keep down. So he ended up making her peanut butter toasts for when she woke up and her stomach was empty or when she had work commitments and had to leave the house for more than an hour. He’s literally spent the Vanity Fair Oscar Party with a peanut butter toast wrapped in plastic wrap in the pocket of his Gucci jacket. Simply because Taylor’s handbag was already packed with another peanut butter sandwich. And running on an empty stomach for her meant that she would end up hovering over the toilet. Something they both worked towards avoiding for months.

“I think I never had peanut butter ever again after Eleanor was born.”

Taylor laughs and nods. She looks back into Joe’s face again. His mind just went down memory lane. And so did hers.

“I really like thinking back to this time. Even though I know that it wasn’t easy.” she says then, has gotten a bit more quiet now. Joe looks surprised. He nods slowly, appreciates her words and the gentle smile on her face.

“I didn’t make it easy for you, did I?” he says then, has gotten a lot more quieter than before. He suddenly acts like he’s studying the menu, but she knows he’s not. All he does is trying to avoid her eyes in this moment. Taylor just almost starts laughing, a slight rush of air escaping her mouth. But suddenly, she realizes that he’s being serious. She cannot believe it. This is not what she meant when she said that it wasn’t an easy time. It certainly is not.

“What is that supposed to mean?” she asks him, her face fully focused on his. He doesn’t really react, slowly closes the menu though and places the paper in front of him on the coffee table again. He knows he will eventually have to look at her again, swallows once and simply does it.

“I think, I.. I was never… if it wasn’t for you, I never would’ve…”

He feels her cold hand on his. A firm grip, stopping him from further talking.

“Just… I know you were struggling at the time. But you really never ever made me feel like you didn’t want me. Or her. And.. you really worked on yourself back then. I know you did. And I know you did it cause you loved me. And her. And that always meant a lot to me.” she says, her voice strong and still emotional because his face makes her emotional. He looks apologetic. Apologetic for something she doesn’t agree with. Joe has made mistakes, yes. But that is not how she remembers this time. All she remembers from back then is that feeling of having a family, that she has never had before. That feeling of belonging she has never experienced in her life before. Waking up with flutters and butterflies in her stomach. Feeling more loved by him than ever before. This feeling of forever in her bones. A gentle breeze of unconditional support he brought into her life, day by day, minute by minute. That’s how she remembers this time.

She now feels his hand on hers, his thumb drawing circles over her hand. He looks at her, his eyes so appreciative of her words. She just shakes her head. Unbelievable how much she loves this man in front of her.

Joe takes a deep breath, smiles at her, then looks down at their intertwined hands for a minute. Her words mean a lot. More than a lot. He’s made so many mistakes. So many mistakes yet this incredible person still sits there, right next to him, looking at him as if he puts the stars into the sky. Continuing to decide to just see the good in him. Even in the person he was back then. A mess. An absolute mess.

“Thanks for loving me, back then.” he says, looks up at her and smiles gently. He’s opening up. And it brings her goosebumps.

“Thanks for never giving up on me. You really made me a better person, Tay. Even more so after leaving me. Back then. You.. you’re the reason I am who I am. If you hadn’t left me, I..” he stops, and Taylor feels nervous. The creaking of the fireplace audible in her ears.

“I grew up. Thanks to you. Everything you did, made me grow. So.. thank you.”

She looks at him, a slight smile creeping up on her face. She never expected this man to say these words to her. She never expected him to reach this newfound level of self-reflection, wisdom and confidence he has now. She’s proud of him. Proud of the twenty-five year old boy she fell in love with back then, and proud of the thirty-six year old father he is today. She has loved every ounce of him in between then and now. She didn’t know him twenty years ago, but she loves who he was back then. And she will love who he is twenty years from now. She already does. An older version of Joe. With a few more dimples in his face and the same lack of hair as his father. There’s love in between those lines, even where there was hurt once.

_______________

“Let me do that.” he says, has stood up from the side of the bed already. He doesn’t like seeing her carry her heavy suitcase from the floor onto the little side table at the end of the guest room. With her belly in front of her, she just drops the bag, a loud noise erupting as she lets the bag fall down again. Joe just stands there right next to her, a little out of place, struggling to remain upright, just watches her ignore him. She’s reaching for her pajamas and the little flower-patterned toiletry bag. Her nails painted in different colours. It pains him to feel once more how much he loves these little things.

“I know I’ve had a bit too much…”

“A bit? Interesting, Joe.” she interrupts him, still not looking at him. Joe sighs. His head is turning. He knows she’s mad. And he’s sorry. He’s sorry for making her mad. He’s sorry for being this version of himself. He would do anything to shove it away, store it under the bed and lock it in a box forever. But he can’t. This is the reality. This is how weak he really is. This baby would be screwed without her, that’s for sure. He wonders sometimes where this guy went. The guy that she fell in love with back then. The guy who was funny and kind and heroic and always broke. He must have gotten lost somewhere. Somewhere between movie sets and airplanes and time zones and camera flashes. And palm trees and properties. Playing high and playing fast. Being good, better, the best.

Joe just stops following her from where he’s standing, watches her disappear in the bathroom. She closes the door, a bit louder than per usual. Joe doesn’t say anything, just lets himself fall onto his side of the bed. With one grip, he pulls off his right shoe, just sits there in trance for another minute before taking off his left one as well. He knows it got out of hand. He knows he drank too much. The room is spinning. He’s angry. At himself. More than anything. He just sits there, his shoe still in his hand, quietly hearing the water in the bathroom running. She must be washing her face before going to bed. Joe swallows, doesn’t move. He just takes a good look at his shoe, remembers her face from before. All he can see is her face from before. The sheer disappointment mixed with shock and fear in the eyes of the person he values the most. He loves everything about her. Her bravery, her sharp mind, her kindness, her smile. Not an inch about her he would deserve. Joe feels a first tear building up in his eyes. One day, she will go. And everything will loose its meaning. Everything. Within a split seconds, the anger in him spills over. He aggressively takes the shoe, throws it at the end of the room, almost pushing over the chair that was next to the table at the end of the room. Suddenly he spies with his eyes that she had left the bathroom already. Just stands there in shock between the bathroom door and him. Her eyes following the shoe he just threw aggressively across the room. He can’t dare look into her face again, cannot take seeing these disappointed eyes for another second.

“Are you out of your mind?” she just says, this time a bit louder than before. Joe looks at her. She has changed into her pajamas already, her open hair hanging over her naked shoulders. Her make up free face as beautiful as ever and the big belly almost making her more attractive than ever before. He swallows. Fear is building up in her face. Fear and anger. He hates himself for this.

“I guess I am.” he says then, his voice almost fully gone. Taylor just stands there, feels as if her throat has stopped providing her with air. She wants to cry, because she doesn’t know who this person is. She knows he struggles. She knows his anxiety becomes unbearable sometimes, and it makes him shut down. But she’s never experienced him like this. Neglecting. Drunk. Aggressive. Cold.

“Is this how you want to be from now on? Getting fucked up alone on an airplane and throwing your shoes at me?”

Joe doesn’t say anything, his hand wandering to his eyes. He’s tired. He’s so so tired, and the floor under him is still moving. He swallows again, the sight of her bare feet and legs standing in front of him still visible in the corner of his eye. She just sighs angrily, then storms off into the bathroom again. He still covers his face in his hands. Why is this sweater so warm. So tight. Almost making it hard for him to breathe.

“You know what? You can sleep by yourself tonight. I’m not getting into bed with this person. And yes, I’m saying ‘this person’ because I have no idea who the fuck you are. Do you know how I feel right now?” she says, has just gotten her phone from the bathroom and now stands in front of him again, almost begging him to wake up from this state and become the man again who she knows so well. He can hear her voice changing. And every second passing by hurts him more and more and more.

“Disappointed.” he answers her, and she can’t even react out of shock. She is worried about him. Seriously, worried. In the past five years, she has never witnessed him like this. Not for a single second.

“I love you, Joe. But I don’t like you right now.”

He doesn’t say anything for a second, then dares to look at her once more.

“I don’t like myself either. So let’s call it even.”

Taylor just stands there, barefoot, her pajama shorts covering her long legs. Both arms crossed anxiously right over her belly. She just looks at him, desperately trying to find an answer in his face but she doesn’t. Maybe this is what everyone always warned her about. Maybe this is what ‘for better and for worse’ really means. Overcoming all the hurt and all the anger inside of her chest, she slowly lets both her arms fall out of the strong and anxious grip from before. She takes a deep breath, then takes one step closer to him. He doesn’t move, just sits there on the side of the bed, staring into white wall behind her. She slowly sits down next to him, just looks at him. Doesn’t say anything. Her belly a bit in the way, as always. She sits there in silence with him. And she can feel the pain radiating from him as her hand touches his shoulder.

“Talk to me.” she whispers. She’s not sure he’s heard her. She’s not even sure herself if she really got these words out of her mouth. It takes a lot in her, to let him treat her this way, and still take one step towards him. But this is what love is. This is what she swore herself back then, when this incredible man got into her life and saved her from destroying herself. She swore herself back then that she would do the same for him. Swore herself that she would love him no matter what. No matter how much darkness they would both have to surpass together.

“I want you to talk to me.” she says again, this time a bit louder, just to make sure he hears her properly. Just looking at his side profile brings her pain already. Because she feels how much pain he is in right now.

“Joe.” she says again, this time her left hand landing on his cheek and making him look at her. Just when she has managed to turn his face to hers, she doesn’t just notice the drunk eyes. She also notices the hot tear running down his cheek as his blue eyes look at her. She swallows.

“I’m not the guy I used to be.” he confesses in a shaking voice. “And you deserve someone who’s not a walking question mark or.. just a shell of a person.” he whispers. His breath filled with tears. His throat tightened. He’s crying, drunk crying and still trying to hide it from her. She swallows. Her hand is not moving away from his cheek. Not even an inch.

“Stop this..”

“I don’t know anymore who I am or what I want and I don’t think I can be a good father for her or a partner for you. That’s the truth.”

“Do you want me?” she asks him then, her face as close to his as humanly possible. Her nose almost touches his, and his hot tears on her hand make her skin break into goosebumps. This is the lowest she’s ever witnessed him. Ever.

“Taylor..”

“You said you don’t know anymore what you want. So I’m asking you, do you want me?”

He swallows, dares to look into her eyes. He nods. The only thing he is certain about is his feelings for her. She knew what his answer would be. There’s no anxiety in her face.

“Then let’s make sure we remind you again who you are.”

“We?”

She nods. Her forehead slowly touching his. He doesn’t know where she’s going with this but the certainty in her grip around his face makes him understand.

“You loved me when I didn’t love myself. And I love you, Joe. I love you so much. And so does your baby. You’re.. you’re always enough for me. Always. We’re three now. And you don’t need to be this idea of perfect that you have in your head. To me, you have always been perfect. Every version of you.” she whispers against his face, both her eyes closed. Just like his. He’s crying. He’s hurt her deeply yet she decides to see the good in him. She suddenly feels his chest heaving up and down. She can’t believe it. It takes less than a few seconds and he breaks down, his face pressed into her neck. He’s bawling. His big hands holding onto the fabric of her pajamas. She’s glad he’s finally allowing himself to feel what he’s feeling. She’s glad he’s opening up to her. It takes a few minutes in her arms to calm down. For his chest to move slower, and his breath to get more steady again. He feels her small hands in the back of his neck, stroking the ends of his blonde hair gently. All he feels is love and understanding. After a while, he slowly lets go off her, both her hands already in his face again, wiping away the tears from his cheeks. He knows his eyes are puffy and swollen. His worst self, sitting right in front of her.

“We will get through this together. I promise, it won’t always feel this way. Trust me, I know what I’m talking about.” she says then, and Joe once more doesn’t know how he would ever deserve her in this moment. He nods. He nods because she means what she says.

“I love you.” he suddenly breathes against her, with a shaky breath and a sunken head. “And I’m so.. I’m so..” he doesn’t need to finish his sentence to make her feel just how sorry he is. She knows. She knows in the way he sits there, almost can’t take her gentle hands stroking his hair. He feels embarrassed and ashamed for how he behaved. He feels ashamed and embarrassed for not showing her his best version today. For disappointing her when she needs him the most.

“I know.” she says then, moves her thumb on his cheek once to make him look at her again. His eyes are still empty and full of pain, but the shame is too prominent for her to take. She slowly gets closer to him again, kisses him for a second. She then lets go off him and kisses him again. Just quickly. Just quick enough to make him understand that she’s okay. She understands now why he acted this way. She forgives him. She has been where he is.

“My parents do think you’re a drunk now, though. So you’ll have a lot of explaining to do.” she says then, tries to make him break a smile but fails. He just nods. he nods again and again. Not knowing if he will ever be able to fix this. Himself. Their relationship. The fact that he wasn’t who she needed this time.

“You..” he stops. He can’t find the right words. His chin is trembling again. Her hand lands in his neck. She kisses his forehead once. He doesn’t need to speak, doesn’t need to explain himself. She knows what he wants to say.

“I have something for you.” she suddenly says, and he looks at her confusedly. “I mean, it’s not like you deserve a present after this evening, but I got you something.” she says, wiping away his tears one more time before she slowly gets up and walks to her suitcase at the end of the room.

_______________

“Baby, if we want to buy some stuff for dinner we have to…” she stops for a second, even though Joe has pulled back already. He just looks at her, his skin still a bit damp from before, his hand still on her naked hips. He waits for her to say something else, but she gives in again. He grins, giggles quietly and steals her another kiss before gently pounds back into her again. She moans quietly, then louder, more and more desperate, definitely sweating by now. The fireplace in this cabin is burning since hours. She should’ve asked him to dim it a bit before they got lost with each other in this bed.

The romantic Christmas Day hike in this gorgeous tiny little village ended after a good hour and a half. They just couldn’t keep their hands off each other. Their sexual tension has always been there, but it’s almost like an old flame slowly turned into a wildfire. And Taylor wouldn’t complain. She couldn’t complain. It’s been years since she’s had sex like this. Emotional sex, good sex, giving, receiving and mind-blowingly addictive.

Joe pounds slowly into her, watches her bite her lower lip at the sensation of him inside of her. Her eyes on his, a thousand thoughts on her mind. He wants to know every single one. He wants to be able to read every dirty thought she has in this moment, wants to push her over the edge and make her feel things she’s never felt before. Taylor slowly lets herself fall back into the pillow, closes her eyes in satisfaction while rolling her head back. After a few moments she looks back into his face, and it does things to him.

“Let me.. let me be on top, please, baby.” she mumbles then, breathing heavily and Joe slowly pulls out of her before laying down next to her again. He’s breathing heavily as well, his blonde hair in all directions with this one strain of hair falling into his face. She loves this version of him. It makes her knees go weak in an instant.

“By the way, this cabin turned into a sauna.” she says, making him laugh for a second. He watches her adjust herself on top of him. His hands on her upper torso. He loves feeling the dampness radiating from her skin. He loves how bothered she is, her mascara on her cheek, her eyes full of lust and love for him.

“I like it actually.” he murmurs in a thick accent, appreciates that she lowers herself to be able to kiss him. The ends of her blonde hair tickling his neck. She tastes so good. He could get lost in her taste.

“I like it when you taste sweaty.” he adds, making the woman on top of him giggle into the kiss.

“You’re making it weird.”

He laughs again, but holds his breath after a split second as she begins her movements on top of him. He knew from the very first moment why she wants to be on top again. It’s always been her thing. Whenever she’s close to finishing, she needs to be in control of the friction between them. It’s one of these things she’s never spoken about. But he’s spent years of loving her. Years of satisfying her in any way he can. He smiles up at her from the pillow where his head rests, can feel her place her hands on top of his chest. He appreciates her riding him the way she does. Slow, but intensive. Her mouth escaping profanities.

“God fucking Jesus christ, fuck me.” she mouths then, and he can’t help but breath out some air, laughing slightly.

“Don’t. Not on Christmas. Not Jesus. You’ll go to hell.” he mouths, and she wants to laugh at his comment, but she can’t. He feels too good. She moans slowly, suddenly feels both his hands gently massaging her inner thighs. His thumbs drawing circles back and forth. Back and forth. He knows exactly what to do to get her to finish.

“Fuck, you feel so good.” she moans again, her hips gracefully moving on his lap. She’s about to loose herself on him, and Joe himself feels his lower region getting tighter and tighter as well. After a few seconds she leans closer to him, exhaustedly places her hands next to his pillow while continuing to ride him. He loves to feel her hair on his face, loves to feel the air escaping her mouth on his face. She looks so beautiful and sexy. Just looking at her like this would easily get him to finish. With closed eyes, she suddenly reaches for his left hand, places it on her full boob. She’s close. Oh, she’s so close.

“You’re gonna come for me, baby?” he breathes heavily, half breathing, half whispering with one hand on her boob and the other one guiding her hips on his. Words have always been her thing. He knows how it always pushes her over the edge to dirty talk with him, especially when she’s clearly in the mood, just like she was today. She’s been giving him this look all day today, has not even missed a single chance to brush over his bum or touch him in any way. Taylor nods, eyes still closed, her hand now securely over his on her bare breast. She doesn’t want him to let go. And she’s close. Oh so close.

“I’m gonna come.” she breathes again, struggles to form a full sentence and with eyes still closed until he feels her clutch around him. All of the sudden, she’s not able to keep her steady movements up from before. But he does the job for her, moves his hips up and down to keep the friction up. She moans loudly, almost screams down this room. Her hand around his hand, that is tightly squeezing her left boob. She lowers her head in her desperate cries, a little satisfied frown in her face until her lips finally find his. With parted lips, Joe kisses her, his tongue slowly meeting hers. He feels a moist sensation in his lower region, which increases the friction between them even more. His right hand moves onto her bare ass, then wanders slowly over her naked torso. He loves feeling her naked and damp body so close. He loves how she looses herself on him, knows damn well that he can barely contain himself at this point. Her lips still parted, she moans into the kiss, seems to be too lost in her own lust to notice him biting her lower lip gently. And it takes less than five seconds until he feels himself exploding in her. His hand on her boob clutching together as hard as hers, just a few moments ago. With closed eyes, he moans once, his right hand now in her hair. She knows exactly what to do to finish him off in the most satisfying way. Her eyes still closed, she continues riding him slowly a few times. So long, and so slow until she collapses on his body. She feels his exhausted breathing, and so does he. That’s when he can already hear her giggling into his neck. The mess he’s just made slowly dripping out of her. He starts to smile, his hand now securely on her head, caressing her hair up and down while they both try to come back down to earth again. Two hearts that beat extra fast and the heat of their bodies radiating from them.

“Fuck, that was…” she stops, her legs feel to weak to move properly. “That was the best holiday fuck. Ever.” she finishes her sentence, making him laugh quietly. He feels the exhaustion as much as her, notices only now how sweaty they both really are.

“We should do this every Christmas from now on. A sex holiday. With no kids or family. Just sex. Lots of sex.”

He laughs again, before it gets more quiet again. They have both just pushed each other to their limits. The best exhaustion in the air. He closes his eyes for a second, loves that he is able to notice how her breathing slows down. Nothing but the creaking of the fireplace in his ears. He can feel Taylor move then. She slowly lifts her head up from his shoulder and looks at him for the first time since she finished. Her bangs are sticky on her forehead and she’s got this healthy flush on her face while he’s still physically inside of her. A sense of intimacy in the air that gives him goosebumps. He never wants to share these moments with anyone else ever again. Intimacy is for him and Taylor. He could never ever be that close to someone else. And frankly, has he ever truly been before?

“I love this. Every bit of this.” he smiles into her face and she does the same, gets closer to him, tickles his nose with hers for a second before giving his lips a gentle kiss.

“My sex god.”

He can’t help but laugh again. She’s the master in being an absolute weirdo after intimate moments like these. His hand now brushing her bangs from her forehead. She’s hot. He can feel that. The sweat in her face being the most attractive thing he’s ever witnessed. He continues smiling at her from where he’s laying, the satisfied smile on his face more evident than anything ever before.

“Want me to turn down the fireplace a bit?” he says, as she breathes out exhaustedly. She really is hot, and he wants her to be comfortable after all. Taylor just nods, appreciates the offer. But what she doesn’t like is the fact that she now has to roll down from his body again, to let him leave the bed for a second. She steals him one last sloppy kiss, then slowly pushes herself out of him. As she hovers over him, she looks down on herself, and then back up at him in shock. He’s already smirking.

“Did you notice that I became a fountain when I…”

“I did. Trust me.”

She grins, knows exactly that she would be extremely embarrassed if this was anyone else but Joe. But with him, it’s just different. He has seen her give birth. He has seen her body in sickness, in health and everything in between. There’s nothing she could physically do to make him not find her attractive anymore. That’s the type of confidence she definitely has when it comes to him. She slowly lets herself fall onto the damp sheets, watches him leave the bed to walk closer to the fireplace in the living room of this old cabin. Thank god, they have pulled the curtains back before engaging in these activities in the last hour. Taylor just lays there, on top of the bedsheets, naked, admiring the naked man in front of her who is busy working on the fireplace. His most intimate parts dangling nakedly between his legs. She has to grin. Why is she able to have the most animalistic sex ever, and then turn into a little kid five seconds later who has to smirk about genitals?

“What time is it?” she asks from bed then, hasn’t moved her head a bit yet. She’s exhausted. Her body feels satisfied but deeply exhausted. She could pass out and fall asleep right here if she wanted to. But the blonde, naked man just walks back towards her.

“Late. Very late. I think shops might be closed already.”

She sighs. Of course their mindless afternoon fuck would have it’s consequences. No dinner. On Christmas Day.

“Don’t worry, I’ll get you fed. A nice McDonald’s dinner by the motorway perhaps? We can also get it as take out and turn this cabin into a candle light dinner to make it more festive.”

She can’t help but giggle at him, as he’s already crawled back into bed with her. As naked as he was before, Joe slowly hovers over her, then leans in to kiss her gently as he can already feel her hug him like a panda. It’s hard to put into words how happy he is. It’s hard to put into words what it’s like living in a day dream. What it’s like to realize that things can go right sometimes. What it’s like to realize that she was always right. It was always him.

“Merry Christmas, my sweet love.” she whispers against his lips and Joe smiles at her cheesiness. She would never say things like this. Unless it’s in bed. In the middle of the night and she feels close enough to him to open up and be as soft as she really is. “A year ago, I never thought this would ever happen to be honest.” she adds whispering. Her small fingers already stroking his beard up and down.

Joe swallows, then takes a deep breath. He’s still on top of her naked but warm body. He nods slowly, looks deeply into her eyes before stealing her nose a gentle kiss. He knows it’s time for this. He knows there’s nothing in between them anymore.

“Did you.. did you mean what you said last night?”

Taylor still looks directly into his blue eyes while laying underneath him on the white pillow of this old bed. He’s fully ready and prepared to find her freaking out now, but the opposite is happening. He did not expect that. She just nods gently, still stroking his cheek. Her eyes looking into his. He feels as if they’re one right now. Has never felt closer to her ever before.

“I did. Yeah.”

“So you.. you want to get married?”

Taylor takes a deep breath, her hand still caressing him. He doesn’t know if he’s tripping, but he feels as if her hand on his skin is shaky all of the sudden. She swallows for once, Joe’s hand has already wandered to her face. He strokes her cheek gently. She’s nervous. He didn’t want to cause this discomfort.

“That was a bit direct, I didn’t…”

“No, it’s.. it’s fine. I…”

She’s looking for words. It’s the first time she’s ever done that. Her. The most communicative and lyrically skilled person on this planet.

“I feel like.. I feel like life gave us a taste of.. what could have been, you know?”

“What do you mean?” he asks quietly, still stroking the soft skin in her face. He can’t really follow her words, doesn’t properly understand what she’s trying to tell him with this.

“If we.. if we would not work out. There was.. there was Naomi and.. and Robert, and.. we were okay, right?”

He suddenly understands. He nods. Just the thought of the past years hurts him physically. Especially now that he’s laying in her arms. In this warmth. Her breath on his. Her hand on his bare chest.

“We were okay, yeah.”

Taylor takes a pause, then tries to form words again that, for the first time, don’t seem to come naturally to her.

“I used to think I couldn’t live without you. Turns out I can. But.. I just feel like, it’s not worth it.”

He smiles. She put it very well. Life without each other is not worth it, not really. Not being together was not the solution.

“That’s why.. I’m not saying that we have to get married tomorrow but… I just have these dreams of our lives. I still have them, Joe. Just like back then.” she says, almost apologetic for the fact that she feels herself getting emotional while she lays here on this pillow, under him, and as naked as can be. A small tears escapes her eye, slowly dripping over the side of her face and getting caught up in her blonde hair. He doesn’t know if this is the aftermath of her watering eyes during sex or if this is her love for him. Her love for him that has boiled up on her chest and overwhelmed her slowly. Joe gets closer to her. His nose touching hers. He wants to kiss her once, but it wouldn’t do justice to what actually needs to be done.

“I.. I have to show you something.” he suddenly whispers against her lips. He looks serious, all of the sudden. Serious but assured. Confident almost. A bit confused over the fact that he just left the bed, just ended this intimate moment so abruptly, Taylor looks after him. She then sits up a little bit as she finds him walk back to her. The white sheets covering her torso, her hair still damp on her face. Joe slowly sits down in front of her again, this time with something in his hand.

She holds her breath.

He sits there, naked, a black little box in his hand.

She just looks at him, but there’s no nervousness in his eyes. The calmest calm she’s witnessed in his face. She doesn’t speak, doesn’t move, just watches him open the box. In front of her, the most beautiful vintage diamond ring. No opal shape, no special embellishments. Just a round, gorgeous diamond ring that sparkles brightly. She looks at the ring, then at him. He still doesn’t speak. He just takes out the ring of the box.

“I.. I have this ring since.. since November four years ago.”

She swallows again. She doesn’t know what to say.

“You.. you gave me this vintage watch when.. before Eleanor was born. And.. it had Three Musketeers engraved on the inside. Right after the most horrible Thanksgiving dinner of your life. And.. I’ll never forget this moment because it meant the world to me. Because I.. I was lost. I was lost in myself and my life, but.. you and Eleanor.” he stops then, takes an emotional and lets out a good breath of air because he’s still amazed by this feeling when talking about it.

“You and Eleanor made me feel this… this purpose. Like.. I am something. I am someone. You really taught me how to love, Tay. Both of you. And with every day passing by, you...” Joe stops, scratches his beard. He’s getting emotional. His eyes still on the ring in his hands. Suddenly, his words are gone. Because words can’t do justice for what he feels right now.

“I got you this ring a week before.. before you…” he stops again, his voice almost breaking. He can’t dare to look into her face again. Instead, his gaze is fully focused on the ring in his hands.

“I wanted you to know that I was still holding onto who we were before Eleanor was in your belly. Who I wanted to be for you and her. I was never perfect, and I’m still not perfect. But I wanted to be better for you. Not just for you, but for me. And…” he stops again, cannot stop looking at the diamond in his hand. It’s not just a ring. It’s as fundamental as the love he carried around with himself for the past four years.

“I want to grow old with you. And I want our children to grow up with us. And I want you to be my wife. And I.. I promise, this time I will be your partner. Your husband, if you want that.”

Taylor just sits there, tears streaming down her face. He only notices the smile under her tears once he stopped speaking. She doesn’t move, just reaches for his hand. She’s shaking, her hand sweatier than ever. She holds his hand for a bit, looks into his eyes, then takes the ring from his hand and takes a good look.

“You already are my partner, Joe.” she says crying, swallows once, then looks back up at him and smiles.

“But I would like you to be my husband, too. I really would like that a lot.”

#Christmasbound #fanfiction #fanfic #taylor swift fanfiction #joe and taylor #taylor swift #joe and taylor fanfiction #joe alwyn #joe and tay #love #lovers #london

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icanbeyourgenie · 5 months

Note

“ I can read! Just not very well. Words swirl on a page for me. ” – Achilles to Nathaniel

Nathaniel could feel he raised a sensitive issue. He didn't mean to, it happened on accident. Three days together and the two men didn't experiment one dull moment, until Nathaniel asked questions about surgery, and one particularly heavy book. It became clear quite quickly that Achilles had troubles reading the words and relied heavily on the pictures. And for some reason, he seemed ashamed about it. Nathaniel didn't see why - any man who could do what Achilles could do with a scalpel should be proud.

“But I have a very good memory. Read me a book once and I memorize it quite easily.”

It broke Nathaniel's heart to see the surgeon try to compensate. He could only guess how many people made fun of this particularity. And he didn't know why he cared that much, but he did.

“Well, I'm afraid I won't be really useful here. I never finish a book. Not unless my Father is forcing me to. And even then, it's pure torture.”

Achilles seemed intrigued. “You have trouble reading too?”

“Not reading, no. Just staying focused. Books are too long, my mind plays tricks on me. No matter how hard I try to stay focused, it just becomes too... boring. I can't help but doing something else. That's why I love poetry the most. It's way shorter.”

Achilles looked at him, and Nate would give anything to know what was going on in his head. They were both seated on a couch, not far away from the table where Nate's victim died, but it was almost forgotten. They were very close. Almost touching, really. Every single one of Nate's senses tingled at this proximity. He wanted to be even closer.

“I...” Nate cleared his throat. “My Father always took this at impertinence, but I just feel like I can't control my brain sometimes. You know?”

“Yes. I do...”

“Look, I don't know what people told you, but I think you're brillant. Really, really brillant. And interesting. Even if there's so much I want to know about you. It's just... Not being able to-”

Nathaniel would've continued to babble if he wasn't stopped by the sudden but welcomed feeling of Achilles' lips against his. His brain completely froze. Achilles must've taken it like a rejection, because he stepped back, looking ashamed.

“I'm... Sorry, I thought... I thought I saw a sign, I probably mistaken it...”

He started to get up, but Nathaniel grabbed his wrist and pulled him back, making Achilles land half on top of him. They looked at each other for a second before their lips joined on her own accord.

It was not a quick and light kiss. Quite the opposite. Nathaniel didn't understand how someone he met so little time ago made him feel the way he did, but he welcomed it anyway. His entire body was on fire, butterflies dancing in his stomach. He only stopped when he realized he already had his hand under Achilles' shirt.

“Wait.” He said as he pulled back, and enjoyed more that he'd admit the sound of protest coming from Achilles' lips. “I'm very bad with timing. Are we going too fast?”

“We met three days ago so I'd say yeah. Definitely.”

It didn't stop Achilles from picking up the kiss where they left it, and all thoughts left Nathaniel's head.

#and that's neurodivergence here #they're so perfect and they don't know it #it's short but i had the scene in mind okay #nathaniel blackwater #nathaniel x achilles #nathaniel writing prompt #writing prompt #likeafairytale

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akuma-homura · 8 months

Text

reflecting on my brothers death rambling

man. I'm listening to Borderline by Tame Impala-- a song I really like, have some muse thoughts for, but also. Repeated on a loop the following day when we found out my brother died.

I. Mm. When it happened I was thinking how I wish I could have talked to him more, interacted more, maybe even shown up on his and moms video chats every now and then. How it had me think of how I wish I was closer to my brothers in general, how I should reach out more.

But I realize more and more that I just don't have it in me. If he hadn't died, things would likely be the same as they were before on my end.

And even thinking now about my remaining brother (somehow only with all of this did I realize he was the middle child lol? it's hard for me to grasp when I'm like 15 years younger than them or so and didn't live with them in the house) I like. I don't actually know how I'd connect. We're family, yes, but. I don't know anything about him. I don't know how much he knows about me.

...I say that because I guess I also just don't have a sense of how people perceive me, the fact that I am perceived-- my late brother apparently talked about I guess what little he'd heard of my projects, how smart I am, ect. (but not smarter than him, of course)

and. That was so bizarre and alien for me to hear. That he actually talked about me. Knew a little bit about what I was up to? How much he loved me.

...shit, I'm tearing up typing all that. Fuck.

I've said it in other ramblings regarding this, but I also just realized I don't know my brothers. Like, as people. I didn't know what my late brother was like, and hearing others talk about him who did know him better...

And I don't actually know much of anything about my remaining brother, either. He's a father. Apparently he has a twitch channel and streams games sometimes. I don't even know what he's doing as a job right now. He's so short?????

I knew my late brother as the nice one, my remaining as the rowdier one. Expected my late brother to be more successful and stable, but the opposite ended up the case.

That's... it.

But even so, even so, even so, the sadness remains. The fact I didn't get to really really know him. The fact he loved me? And I never even-- somehow I just thought he didn't really think about me at all enough to feel anything about me.

We have a picture of him on the wall-- we have an area in the kitchen that's basically become a bit of a memorial area for the people we've lost like... honestly since the start of the new decade. And now he's there, too.

And every time I look. Every time I see. There's still that pang of pain. The emotions swelling up. I'm still sad.

I can deal with it fine and all, but. I dunno. I guess this is the biggest death I've experienced of a human being, and I know grief doesn't go away.

I was already sad thinking about Technoblade's death, I was getting into Generation Loss after the streams were done, I was working on UTAU stuff, and then...

I can't touch the project I was working on with my old UTAU. I try to, but I can't. The emotions come back. The realization that while I was working on it, he was in the hospital, dying. Dead. The exact time I took a small pause, was when he died. When I was finally going to go to sleep at like 5AM, I was laughing to some tiktoks, then heard a sound from my mother, wondered if something happened to our dog rose before thinking something happened to a human person. And then.

And then...

And now I can't touch that cover. I had ideas for it. I had ideas for Heikinne. But now I just...

Hghhhgh. Associations. And not only that, the grief has messed my body up, even though it isn't constant. I can tell I'm physically doing worse off comparatively, when I was already doing badly bc of the stress from the scam in February, on top of what I can only assume is long covid shit on top of my existing issues. Even now. Hell, that's why I haven't streamed as much as I've wanted-- I REALLY wanted to get back to the swing of things in August, but I genuinely wasn't able to. Thinking about it was too taxing. I want to do stuff for spooky month this month, and I hope I can, but I'm also..... unsure if I ultimately will, either.

I dunno.

I do wish he could still be around so I could actually show him what I'm up to. Especially with me actually getting some stuff running.

But it does ultimately want to have me continue to work, regardless. We only have so much time, and I want to be able to get out as much as I can before anything happens, either to me, or to the world.

#[ ;text ]#vent --#grief --#rambling --

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ralphxconch · 2 years

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CHAPTER 6 OMG

Hey yall! I’ve made it halfway through writing this fic! only took me over a year LMAO. Anyways, enjoy!!

Next Chapter (eventually LOL)

Previous Chapter

AO3

Word Count: 1.8k

Master list

The trip from Paceme to the abandoned lands of Belluma was steep. Large hills bordered the fertile lands and villages from long grass and ruin. Acres of land were left deserted, untouched. The ash was long gone, but the damage remained. The trip was brutal during the winters, but lucky for Jack and Roger, the season thawed long ago.

The two ventured out at dawn. The crisp morning air nipped at their skin as they began their journey. No carriages were out during such early hours of the morning, and no carriage would ever bring them to their desired destination. This left them only one option, riding horseback.

They brought only what they deemed necessary, rather, what Roger deemed of most importance. They spent one long hour on their journey, what felt like an eternity to Jack, to reach the large hill that he recognized all too well.

“Just beyond the hill,” Roger said, but he didn’t need to say it. Jack already knew. The memory of ash and blood filled his mind, his breath becoming heavy as he grew with nervousness. He gulped as they approached the peak of the hill, his throat dry. He watched as the grasslands disappeared over the horizon, his eyes were met with the sight of the tall, broad structure that still stood after years.

He felt like he could vomit at the sight, he stared at the plant infested walls. Vines grew up the sides of the once gleaming palace. Debris still sat at the feet of the building, large chunks of concrete and metal rotting in the ground. He pictured the once beautiful castle that felt as if it touched the sky.

But that place was no more, he swallowed that fact with his pride as they approached. He slowed his horse, watching as Roger did the same. He tugged on the reins, halting completely.

“Come on, let’s not waste any time,” Roger said sharply, hopping off his horse. Jack slumped his bag over his shoulder, jumping off his own horse.

He looked up at the palace, feeling miniscule next to its height. He took a heavy breath as he walked slowly through the tall, soft grass. As they walked, he resisted the temptation to run his hands along the moss filled stone. The sound of their boots clicking against the worn down stone sharply penetrated through the soft summer air as they reached the paved walkway. Once they approached the door, Roger stopped in his tracks, turning to the ginger.

“Might wanna step back,” He said vaguely. But Jack did as he was told, watching Roger’s movements closely.

Roger also took a step back for a second before charging at the door, using the heel of his boot to slam it open. The door shook violently as it was forced open, a few chips of wood flying off of its surface. A small piece fell at Jack's feet, but he ignored it, kicking it away as he followed Roger’s lead.

Jack sucked in a sharp breath as they entered. Disgusting nostalgia filled his bones as he observed. The layout was exactly as he remembered, minus the chunks of stone missing from the walls and ceiling. Small plants sprouted out from the cobble floors, vines spread underneath his boots. They climbed up the wall as well, some hanging from the ceiling.

“Come on, this way” Roger grabbed Jack's attention, voice echoing against the walls of the empty hall. Jack nodded, muttering an apology as he paced behind.

The pair passed through a doorway, leading to a slightly cleaner room. A wooden table stood at the center. It certainly didn’t look new, but it wasn’t completely coated in dust and debris either. Jack assumed Roger had cleaned it off beforehand. Roger tossed his bag on top of the table, opening it swiftly.

“So, what exactly is this plan of yours? And why did we have to go all the way out here to discuss?” Jack said as he crossed his arms.

“Patience Jack, I’ll explain,” Roger said as he continued to shuffle with his bag. Jack scoffed, crossing his arms.

“You better, I don’t want to be out here for nothing.” He said. He tossed his own bag to the side, taking in the sights of the room once more. The sun shone brightly through open windows, once beautiful stained glass was now nothingness. Only the border of stone remained, a few pieces of broken glass and the memory was the only proof it was ever there.

“Weird being back?” Roger asked. Jack looked down to his feet, staring at the mossy ground beneath them.

“I guess so, yeah. It’s been awhile…it’s different..” He spoke softly. He drew in a deep breath, shifting awkwardly. Different, more different than he had imagined, then he had remembered from that painful day. He pondered upon the destruction, the pain, everything he had abandoned.

He shook the feeling, if Roger’s plan were legitimate, he would not flee again. He wouldn’t even allow the chance. But, that all relied on this plan, and he knew that. The weight was not on his shoulders.

“Get on with it, I’m getting impatient,” He demanded, and Roger only shook his head. He looked up to Jack, eyes coldly staring as he smirked.

“Get over here then, I’ll show you,” He spoke. Jack felt chills down his spine, approaching the table unsurely. He looked at what was set up in front of him. The map, with his mark still streaking down the paper, another vessel of ink and a few quills, and Rogers' worn out leather bag. He stared at the items in front of him, trying to piece together exactly what was going on.

“Do you remember where everything in Belluma is?” Roger asked, leaning onto the table, limiting the gap of space between him and Jack. Jack shrugged, leaning back to relieve the tension a bit.

“A little, I vaguely remember where most things are…I think. I haven’t been here in years so…I guess I wouldn’t know for sure,” He said, his breaths still shaky. Roger drew a few small circles on the map before continuing.

“These areas, I remembered the buildings being made completely out of stone, so I went and checked, almost all of them still stand. A few were a bit beaten up, but they’d still work in use with a bit of cleaning up,” Roger explained, pointing to the circles he’d drawn.

“How many times have you been out here?” Jack asked sternly. Roger smirked, a small chuckle escaping his lips as he looked down to the table.

“More times than you could imagine. This isn’t exactly a spur of the moment plan,” He lifted his head as he spoke. “I’ve already figured out where each essential business would be located, as well as housing capacity-”

“And how exactly are you planning to get enough people over here to build up an entire country? I’d love to believe you, trust me, but your plan sounds crazy-” Jack’s voice was cut off by the sharp vicious sound of Rogers hand slamming to the table, underneath, it held a small stack of papers.

“This. This is how,” He spoke sharply, sliding the paper over to Jack. He examined the carefully written strokes of ink, grazing over every word swiftly. “You’ll give this speech in front of the citizens of Paceme, just like you did with your last one. Except this one is more…carefully crafted. Persuasive. It should buy us loyalty in no time, soon after, you’ll have enough people to call this country your own once more. Isn’t that what you’ve always wanted?” Roger stared, Jack’s eyes shot to the ground, holding the papers closely to his chest.

“This seems too good to be true,” Jack spoke quietly as he looked up, staring Roger in his eyes, black as ink.

“And maybe it is, but there’s only one way to find out.” Jack trembled, speechless. The boys stared at each other, the silence almost daring them to break eye contact. Jack drew a deep breath, shallowing harshly as he shivered.

“Roger! Hey, where are you man?” A voice echoed against the walls, followed by the sound of clicking boots.

“In here,” Roger said, despite his eyes still being glued to Jacks. Finally, he broke the contact, tilting his head slightly to the side as his eyes moved to the doorway. Maurice’s figure ran out from the hallway, halting at the door frame.

“Jack…uhm,” He began, but Roger did not let him continue.

“Come in, we’ve been waiting,” He said. Maurice nodded as he waltzed in, slowing his pace as he sensed the tension. Jack slumped to the floor next to his bag, resting against the wall. “Now that we’ve all made it I-”

“Why is he here?” Jack questioned, looking up from his feet to stare Roger down.

“The answer is not as simple as you might think, there are many reasons why I would need a third person for this operation,” Roger snapped. His eyes trailed to Maurice, who’s eyes filled with hesitation.

“As true as that might be, why me? Wouldn’t you be better off with someone from the palace?” He asked.

“No one from the palace is to be trusted, not with something as risky as this. Besides, I need someone on the outside. To put it simply, people talk. A speech isn’t enough for everyone, some need the persuasion of their peers to help influence their decisions, and if the town's beloved baker is on our side…” Roger spoke emotionlessly. Jack shook his head, standing from his place on the ground.

“And how are you so sure of your choices? What makes him more likely to keep quiet than anyone else?” Jack questioned as he began to slowly step towards Roger.

“I’ve always had faith in Maurice, besides, he knows the consequences if he spills anything.” Roger shot a sharp glance at Maurice, who nodded silently in response.

“Very well, but I’m still skeptical about all of this. It sounds insane, building a whole country from the ground,” Jack crossed his arms, eyes narrowing at the brunette.

“I’ve explained to you everything. The layout, the plan, all I need now is someone to rule. Isn’t that what you’ve always wanted? I’m handing you everything you’ve been longing for on a silver platter and, somehow, you’re still dissatisfied. Maybe the life of a prince does suit you. If you, however, still disagree, my offer awaits.” Roger stepped closer to Jack, closing the gap between them, only a few inches stood between them. “I’m giving you what you want, power, revenge, and a kingdom of your own, away from Ralph. But, if you're hesitant, then by all means, take you leave.” Roger turned away from Jack, beginning to walk slowly towards the table.

“Wait-!” Jack yelped desperately. Roger turned back, observing as Jack composed himself once more. “I’ll do it. I’ll give your speech. Let’s rebuild Belluma, once and for all.”

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sanmoskisserofficial · 1 year

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giggles giggles giggling profusely hiiii :3c nice guys finish last, redundant, scattered, uptight, and jinx for sanford. or doc if u wanna talk about him a little more <333 (or both if u feel up for that <3)

hiiii hi honey THANK YOU i'm sorry i took forever to get to this ough

Nice Guys Finish Last - what do your f/o(s) do when you "run out of gas" emotionally and/or socially? what do you do for your f/o(s) when they feel that way too?

when bite runs out of energy, sanford will do what he can to get it out of whatever situation it's stuck in. this often happens in the way of him getting bite a blanket and something to bite if it's like... dealing with negative energy from being burnt out. if it's just tired, sanford will hold it until it catches up on energy and starts to feel better.

in the event sanford runs out of gas, though, bite will usually try to keep his attention on it, mainly to make sure nobody gets snapped at, or, in the case of being tired, it will literally lay on top of him. partner quiet time.

on the other hand, when bite runs out of gas around doc, he'll usually get it to a quiet area and make sure it's hydrated. that's usually like his first plan of action and he goes from there depending on the situation.

when doc runs out of energy, bite also tries to get him to a quiet area and will kind of. stand guard to make sure nobody bothers him while he's recuperating. i hope that makes sense <3

Redundant - who says "I love you" first and how? (just in spoken words, using actions, writing it down in a letter, etc etc) who says it more often? do either of you struggle with saying it to each other?

with sanford, bite absolutely said it first. the two of them are pretty equal in how often they say it to each other, and i think between the two of them, bite struggles a little more with saying it.

okay so i've already kind of gone over this with doc in another post (you can find that here) for the "who said it first and how" but. to kind of go over the other part of the question. bite *definitely* says it more often. i see doc as being very awkward about saying it verbally but he definitely has little signs and ways to say it that aren't verbal. very similar to a thing my spouse and i do (we have a little hand motion we do) so i think it's more like that rather than spoken word from him. god i hope that makes sense.

Scattered - do you and your f/o(s) have any sort of scrapbook with pictures and memories with each other? if you don't, is there anything else you have to keep track of all your memories together? (i.e. a digital photo album, pictures in each other's wallets, love letters to each other, etc)

sanford definitely has like. a picture in his wallet of him, deimos, and bite. they're a triad okay. it's very important to me that people understand this.

edit. they both have this picture in their wallets, okay? it's vital that you know this <3

doc and bite have more of a digital photo album saved to their technology that they both use. each photo has a date attached and a note somewhere to go with it.

Uptight - do you and your f/o(s) stay up late together? or does one of you stay up and the other ends up falling asleep/going to bed early? what sorts of things do you do for each other if you can't sleep?

sanford usually goes to bed earlier, i think he has more of a military sleep schedule somehow. bite stays up super late. usually until around the time sanford wakes up and sanford is always like "why the fuck do you do this. please. sleep like a normal person". if one of them can't sleep, cuddles become mandatory.

doc's incredibly guilty of like. rarely sleeping. so he and bite will stay awake together until one of them falls asleep. if sleep is necessary for one or both of them, they'll like. find a nice cozy little spot to cuddle and likely fall asleep in.

Jinx - how clingy are you and your f/o(s) with each other? who's the clingier one in your relationship and in what way? (physically, emotionally, socially, etc)

with sanford, bite's more physically clingy i think. also probably emotionally and socially tbh. sanford's kind of physically clingy with it but not nearly quite as much, and rarely lets it out of his sight in social settings? if that makes sense for this. i have no idea if it does <3 oh well

bite's INCREDIBLY clingy with doc, in nearly every sense of the word and it's probably clingier than doc. doc is a little clingy with it as well, but in more of a sense of worry? i hope that also makes sense but oh well if it doesn't /lh

thank you for enabling my gayass <3

#♡ bite answers! ♡#♡ obligatory partner tag~! ♡#♡ r: sanford ♡#♡ r: 2bdamned ♡

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jimwellccortezsblog · 1 year

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We traveled to Baguio to explore the city with our cousins. When you're with relatives, it's more fun. As it is too cold for me there, the climate I experienced here is very different from our place. We visited many beautiful locations there. And I was surprised by what I witnessed there. Because of the cleanliness of the environment and the discipline that people have there, the ambiance of the place will grow.Because so many tourists travel there to experience the region's exquisite culture,I can assert that the Baguio city region is wealthy.

We traveled to Sta Rosa for our holidaybreak to joyfully enjoy Christmas and

the new year.We joyfully celebrated

Christmas in a small party after wakingup early to attend church with our friends throughout the holiday season.Because violet is regarded as the auspicioushue for the upcoming year, my cousin

and I decided to utilize it when we

decided to do a tshirt to greet the newyear at Christmas.Our relative played

as we were waiting for the countdown tothe new year and the prize is cash. We discussed what we had planned after the game. We grinned as we ushered in

the new year.

We chose to wear the same t-shirt on the day when godmother Cheila Mae's son turned seven, and here we were joyfully celebrating.

Godmother Cheila Mae interacted with usas if we were just friends, and she assured us that no matter what, we would always be together. Being with them

makes me very pleased because they are among those who treat me like I am no

different from them. Even though CheilaMae isn't truly my real godmother,I

consider myself extremely lucky to havemet her and know thatshe will always bethere for my friendsand I.

I was one of the students chosen to

represent our school in volleyball whenI was 13 years old and in grade 7 at

Sta Monica National High School.I couldsee how supportive our teachers were.I think I was little at that time, so my coach made me the first ball reciever (libero).I get anxious before every game because I worry that the ball will strike me in the face because everyone else is so much bigger than me. As a result, I didn't always play

enough.I was swiftly removed from the

game after being introduced.Even thoughwe weren't a top team at the time, we

managed to win the volleyball match.

This is the day I am happy because even though my mother is not with me on the day of my graduation from elementary school, I am proud of her because she can do all the hardships for us so that we can finish our school. I was happy on this day because even though I was not honored, I got a medal from my graduation from elementary school. At the end of my elementary school, I was nervous because I was going to be a junior high school student and I would meet new classmates that I didn't know their personality.

I told my aunt that I was going to come back to our house because it was

almost time to start school again when it was almost time for me to return to it.My aunt told us to go to church

first before heading to Marian Orchard to have a stroll and take some photos before we departed.The various plant

species, stunning statue, and serene

atmosphere of Marian Orchard make it a very attractive place to visit. Your problems will vanish due to the place's

tranquility.

You can see in the picture that there is a red horse because they are older than us, they are already drinking while we are just talking to them, we took a picture to have memories. In this way we will have bonding with each other and in this way we strengthen our relationship with each other as cousins. And in this simple way we become happy together.

I went to my grandmother's house because her nephew came from Canada and he said he wanted to be with us, because we had a bit of a relationship together, he asked us to take a picture so that he would have memories here in the Philippines. We talked to him because he knew He also speaks Tagalog.

That day our cousin, sister Dixie, want to have a bonding with us so she went alone here to take us for strolling at Centro Mall. Before we went for a walk, she asked us to eat at Shakey's. After we finished eating, she said that we should play a game at Tom's World before we go to get the most out of it,she said we had to enjoy our bonding here. After playing, we went back to home to take at rest because we were tired from playing.After taking at rest she told us that she will going to their house in Sta Rosa and she said i hope youre enjoy with our bonding.

In that picture you can see us participating in the game with my cousins because that day was my cousin Paula's seven-year-old birthday. It used to be when I was just a child I can't deny that I like balloons, so in every party we went to, I always told my mother to get a balloon for me and I never came home without a balloon when I went to our house. I am happy because our family is complete there because every time there are occasions, our aunts, uncles and cousins come home.

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anonquack · 3 years

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| Best Friend |

Alex Quackity x Reader, Oneshot!

Word Count: 10661

Warnings: Some curse words and overthinking. This one got a bit long!

Summary: After a CC Convention is announced, you and your friends plan to meet up for it. You expect to enjoy yourself with friends but instead are forced to deal with feelings you didn't even know you had. Luckily, your friends are there to give you a push in the right direction.

"Okay but height comparison between Quackity and Sapnap when??" You asked midst all the chaos occurring on that wonderful night. Despite your busy schedule, you'd gotten some time off to finally stream and some friends to keep you company.

Which resulted in this mess of a stream you were now broadcasting.

Your question caught their attention, and a soft scoff could be heard from Sapnap's mic.

"You're kidding, right? You're basically saying you need to CHECK that I'm taller when we already know that's true. You're insulting me." Sapnap said, the cockiness evident in his tone. You couldn't help but stare at your monitor in amusement at how sure of himself he sounded.

"That's not true. Literally check the height check Karl and I had versus the one Sapnap had with him." Quackity argued back, earning scoffs from almost everyone on the call.

"I know you're trying to use that to back you up, but you're just proving my point." Sapnap was intense whenever he became competitive or got into arguments, so you could only raise your brows as you watched chat fly by with their own opinions on the discussion, including their very questionable comments regarding Sapnap and how attractive he was being.

"Well, personally," Bad quipped in, "I think Sapnap's the taller one. Just makes the most sense since Quackity gives off Short Person Energy."

"Yeah? Well keep that WRONG opinion to yourself. That shit's embarrassing-"

"Language!" Bad interrupts Quackity, eliciting a laugh from everyone on call.

"You know chat," you call out after pondering on a solution for a bit, "We can figure this all out during the meetup!"

"Meetup?" Bad asked, confusion evident in his tone. You could almost see his furrowed brows and confused smile.

"Yes, Bad, meet-up. All four of us. Plus the others. And you guys, if you decide to go." The last bit was directed at the viewers. "Don't you remember? The convention is a thing that's supposed to be happening this year."

"Ohhh." He let out a small sound, as if his memory was finally coming back. "I haven't decided if I'm going yet." He admits softly.

"You most certainly are! You have to be there so I can beat BOTH Sapnap and you up once we all find out I'm the taller one." Quackity chimes in finally, teasing tone evident.

"As if," Sapnap scoffs, "Bad and I will literally kick your ass."

"Language." Soft as ever, and also a sign that it's getting late. You look over at your monitor, which displayed the time before letting out a small gasp.

"Oh- it's late. I hope I haven't been keeping you guys awake for too long. It's probably best we end for tonight anyway." You hum softly as you click some tabs away, noticing the faint sounds of stretching heard in the background of the call.

"It's fine, I wasn't even tired until you mentioned how late it was. You should've kept quiet." Quackity says with a patronizing tone, to which you simply chuckle.

"Thank you guys for sticking around. I really had a lot of fun.. we should do this more often. Us four." It was an honest confession, but perhaps too soft for them all and too personal for the audience to listen in on too.

"I had fun too, you should invite me to your streams more often, or, whatever." Sapnap mumbles, sounding a bit tired as well, but sincere despite the lack of care in his words.

It results in a small smile on your face anyway.

"Bye!! Thank you for inviting us, I'm gonna miss messing around with you all. Sleep well." Bad adds, a small whine to his voice as they all start saying their goodbyes.

As they finish up their goodbyes, you quickly deafen to start saying your own goodbyes to chat and thanking the last minute subs rolling in.

After all is over, you finish closing up the tabs, leaving the discord one last. As you're about to officially leave the call, you realize there is still one person there. He hadn't left.

"Quackity-?" You'd voiced out in confusion after undeafening. You'd thought they'd all leave while you took your sweet time saying goodbye.

"Yeah?" He sounded confused by your own confusion. You couldn't help the small smile that appeared on your face.

"Were you waiting for me to end or did you just forget to leave the call?" It was a genuine question, but perhaps a teasing tone slipped in towards the end.

"I was waiting, I'm not an asshole nor a dumbass." He lets out a laugh before continuing. "I just wanted to say I had fun tonight."

You hummed softly, "I'm glad you did. I had fun too."

"If I'm being honest, I wasn't feeling all too well, and just, joking around with you.. Sapnap, and Bad.. well it was just really nice. Thank you." His tone was soft, filled your headphones so nicely and brought comfort into the air.

"Oh, well it's good that you're feeling better now, but if you ever aren't feeling up for a stream.. please tell me, okay? Your wellbeing is much more important to me than a scuffed stream."

"No no, it's fine. I needed something to distract myself with and you all helped so much. It really got me excited for the meet-up. I- I can't wait to hang out with you in person. With all of you, I mean."

The smile on your face grew, almost to the point where it had your cheeks hurting. "I can't wait to hang out with all of you either. Good thing we won't have to wait long, hm?"

Faint sounds in the background of stretching and even softer yawns. "Mhm. Do you wanna switch to phone call?"

It was the usual invitation to fall asleep on call together. At this point, it almost felt strange whenever you headed to bed without Quackity mumbling stuff about his day to you or hearing the soft breathing sounds from his end of the call.

"Sounds good. Talk to you in a bit." You smiled, hearing a small bye from him before leaving the call. You turned off your whole setup for the night and headed straight to your bed.

It didn't take long for the phone to start ringing a few moments after you'd managed to lay down.

"Hi." You answered softly, placing the phone next to your head as you covered yourself with your blankets. It was only a matter of time before the sleepiness took over, but for now you'd enjoy Quackity's company.

"Hey." Was his response, voice sounding much closer now that you were laying down with your phone so close to your ear. It almost felt like he was laying down beside you.

You wondered for a split second what that would be like, if he'd be warm and welcoming or if he'd value his personal space while sharing a bed. As friends, of course.

You refocused on his voice as he began talking about his plans for the meet-up, and all the things he wanted to do once you all were in person. It was so sweet to hear how excited he was, and just how much he wanted to do with you all.

Sweet moments like these make you hyper-aware of the amazing friends you have, and how much love you have for them all. Tonight couldn't have been better, all thanks to them.

—

As the meet-up date gets closer, and more interactions happen during streams / calls / messages, it becomes more evident how much your friends mean to you; just how badly you want to meet all of them.

And as the date for the meet-up gets closer, responsibilities such as packing for your trip join your very long To-Do list.

You're on the phone with Bad as you both choose clothes to take, folding and packing them nicely. Making conversation, with Rat barking in the background occasionally, as the cherry on top.

Moments like these make you realize how good of a friend Badboyhalo is. He's kind, always knows what to say to help people feel better. He's funny, he's charming, full of love and support for his friends.

You two had been joking around on FaceTime for quite some time after you'd packed all essentials. He showed you tricks he'd managed to teach Rat, and you gave him an apartment tour.

Neither of you seemed to be getting tired, so you stayed on call until somehow you ended up sprawled on your sofa, laptop at hand, screen sharing YouTube videos. Bad was resting comfortably on his bed as small giggles left him at the absurdity of the videos you two were watching.

Every few minutes a small "We should do that," or a "Imagine Sapnap doing that," or a "I want to meet you all so bad," would be murmured into the air with only a hum of agreement to compliment it. It only made you yearn for your friends even more.

"Bad." You called out after quite a few random videos and lids getting heavier with each second.

"Yes?"

"When I see you, I'm gonna hug the shit out of you. I hope you know that." You said, small smile on your face as you watched his head lift up from the pillow at such a fast speed.

"Language-! But well, that would be nice. I will also be giving you tons of hugs. To all of you." He pauses for a second before continuing. "I was actually kinda nervous for the meetup, but now I'm just so excited."

"I'm really glad to hear that, Bad. I will make sure you enjoy yourself to the max."

"Thank you y/n," he replies softly, resting his head against the pillow again, "I will make sure you enjoy yourself too."

You smiled at the state he was in, you two would fall asleep in no time, so your thoughts were honestly incoherent, and your tongue could not be tamed as your thoughts wandered aimlessly.

"Do you think I can take Sapnap and Quackity in a fight? In case they try to beat me up?"

"I doubt they'll try to beat you up, they'll be too busy fighting each other, and he'll be too busy thinking about how cute you are." His words were slightly slurred at this point, and all you could do was laugh as you imagined a fight between Sapnap and Quackity as fans tried getting a picture with them.

It crossed your mind for half a second to ask who exactly would be thinking such a thing, but any sign of a functioning brain between you two was nonexistent at that very moment. So all you really said was, "Good. But I'm still going to be prepared just in case."

—

After so many excited calls and planning, the day was finally here. Everyone would be traveling out today to meet up at the house you'd all managed to rent for the week / weekend you guys would be staying there. This way, you'd all be able to maximize the time spent together, and also save money. It sounded like a wonderful idea, really.

After arriving in the city, you patiently waited for the driver that'd be taking you there. You couldn't help but realize just how anxious you were starting to feel. The moment when you'd meet all your friends was getting closer and closer. What if it wasn't everything you'd expected? Or if it was awkward?

The ride there was too quick. Before you knew it, you were pulling your luggage out the trunk and heading up the path that lead to the front door. You stood still for a few seconds before your knuckles were knocking against the firm wood. The noise echoing for a few seconds as you stood in anticipation.

The door swung open, and with a big grin, you were pulled into a hug by no other than Badboyhalo. You quickly wrapped your arms around him as well, not wanting to let go. He was finally here! And he was real! Real, so so real. Any concerns you had on the way here slowly dissipated the longer he had you in his warm hold.

"Bad!" You said happily, slightly squishing him as your embrace tightened for a few seconds. Seriously too good to be true, but true nonetheless.

As he finally pulled away to smile at you, you felt lightheaded at the insane rush of dopamine in your system. As your head finally cleared up, you realized someone else was walking towards you two.

He wore a small smile on his face as he approached, it slowly growing as he got closer and as excitement became harder and harder to contain.

"Quackity." You called out, face lighting up immediately at the sight of him.

"Hi." He responded, sheepish smile on his face. Had he always looked this good?

It only took a few steps before your arms were around him, pulling him close. Although your firm grip caught him off-guard, he managed to melt into the hug soon after, arms wrapping around you as well.

"Big Q! Quackity! Alex!" You smiled as you pulled away, hand reaching up to give his cheek a light squish. You couldn't really help yourself, he was just too pleasing for your eyes. If the dopamine from earlier wasn't already too much, having him this close and feeling oh so real was even more deadlier.

He laughed at your affectionate touch, obviously not having enough of you either. It didn't take long for him to pull you back in for another embrace. "Holy shit." he mumbled into the hug, "You're actually fucking here. I can't believe it y/n." His tone was soft and it had you melting into his embrace all over again. It was intoxicating in the best way, but eventually you both pull away, smiling at each other with so much appreciation.

You hadn't really taken into account just how excited you were to see all your friends, especially someone as important as Quackity. The one you told almost everything to during late night calls, the person you could honestly consider a best friend. All of them were that to you, but it just felt so much stronger with him. You didn't really know how to explain it.

Before you could even give your mind time to dwell, Quackity was being pulled off you by none other than Sapnap and Karl, which quickly replaced Quackity's arms with their own.

"Guys!!" You called out happily as you hugged them back just as tightly. "Am I really the last one here? Where's Dream, or George?"

"We've literally been waiting like an hour for you to get here! We were all getting impatient." Karl laughed as he finally pulled away from the hug.

"Seriously impatient." Mumbled Sapnap into your shoulder before letting go from the warm embrace. "What took so long?"

"Sorry that I don't live as close to here as you guys do. My flight took longer than expected too."

"Who cares! At least you're finally here." Dream's voice, followed by heavy footsteps on the floor, and laughter as George ran over to where you stood with your suitcase.

"Y/N!! We're all finally together." You almost closed your eyes instinctively from how bright his smile was. George's energy was so contagious, you couldn't help but return the energy he was giving you.

Finally, you turned to Dream, who was standing there in all his tall glory.

"Holy shit." You mumbled as you eyed him from head to toe. "You're so fucking tall."

Laughter erupted from everyone before big arms wrapped around you, filling you with warmth and love. You were finally here with all your friends, and it was better than you could've ever imagined.

"Okay," Karl announces once everyone had greeted each other and given all the much needed hugs, "We were actually thinking movie night so we can all just relax and enjoy each other's company. What do you think, y/n?"

"You aren't getting any complaints from me. What movie are we watching?"

At that, Karl and Sapnap raced off to see who could get the remote control faster. You assumed it was in regards to who had the power to choose what everyone watched.

You watched in amusement as Karl and Sapnap argued over what movie to watch, George chiming in here and there just to fuel the lighthearted argument.

"Did you think they'd be just as annoying in person?" You jumped slightly at the sudden voice coming from behind you, but quickly relaxed as Quackity stood beside you.

"No, I also didn't think it was such a big deal who got to choose the movie." Your eyes trailed back to the arguing pair.

"Oh hush. The food Dream ordered isn't even here so really we're doing you all a favor. Taking our time to choose wisely." Karl argued back, to which Dream laughed.

"I guess that's one way to see it, but it's almost here according to the app, so hurry up."

Silence, before the arguing resumed and filled the living room with a pleasing buzz.

You watched as Dream headed over to you and gently placed his hand onto your shoulder, "Let me show you where your room is so you can get all comfy before movie night starts, yeah?"

"Thank you, Dream. I'd actually really appreciate that." With that, you gave Quackity a small wave before following after Dream. Freshening up after sitting in a plane for hours would certainly help make the rest of the night 10x more pleasant.

—

Once you'd walked back out into the living room, you saw everyone had their plate of food, everyone already comfy in their spots.

You looked around before spotting the empty seat beside Alex and the plate of food you assumed was for you.

"Hurry! He's not gonna bite. Sit down so we can finally start movie night." Sapnap whined the longer you stood around.

"I wouldn't be too sure about that.." George mumbled before receiving a stiff elbow in the ribs from the person seated next to him.

"Language." The last fatal blow.

Dream chuckled before pointing at the available seat. "We even waited for you in order to start eating, so sit your ass down."

You playfully rolled your eyes as they all started complaining about how long you were taking. You sat down beside him, giving him a glance before picking up the plate of food before you. It was still nice and steamy, just like Dream had said it would be after dropping you off in your room. You hadn't realized just how hungry you were until now.

After taking a few bites and hearing the movie start, your gaze returned to the person peacefully sat next to you, taking a few seconds to truly take in the sight before you.

He was wearing a plain black short-sleeve shirt, and some basketball shorts. He looked so comfortable. And even indoors with friends, the beanie kept his hair away from his face and hidden, poorly, but hidden nonetheless.

You smiled as you got comfortable as well, admiring how the light from the TV illuminated his face before finally deciding to focus on the actual entertainment Karl and Sapnap had worked so hard to pick. All for movie night.

The movie was interesting, and you couldn't help the few times you almost choked on your food due to all the jokes being slipped in throughout the movie. Maybe Karl was right about how it takes time to pick the perfect film that fit the mood. A good laugh, some good food, and the company and comfort from friends was the best thing to do on the first day together.

Before you all knew it, you were 2 movies in and all in drowsy states.

Everyone excused themselves, the exception being George and Quackity whom had fallen asleep towards the end of the second movie. Dream agreed to wake George up, meanwhile you turned to the sleeping figure next to you.

He looked too cute, mouth slightly open from the uncomfortable position he'd fallen asleep in. You gently shook his shoulder. "Alex." You called out a few times, until finally his eyes fluttered open and he slowly looked around in confusion.

"You fell asleep during the movie. We're all heading to bed for the day, come on."

Regardless of his sleepy state, he stood and followed as you two headed to your rooms.

"Goodnight, Alex."

"Night, y/n."

As you finally laid in your bed for the next week, you couldn't help but feel so fortunate to have such a wonderful opportunity to meet all of your friends and share a home with them.

You couldn't wait to see what tomorrow had in store for you all.

—

It was a lazy morning and lazy afternoon the next day, the only exceptions being going out for lunch, but besides that everything was done in the comfort of their home.

Dream, Sapnap, and Karl were busy playing a multiplayer game in the living room while Bad, George, and Quackity messed around in the kitchen, eating snacks and making up the absolute dumbest shit to stay entertained.

It seemed difficult to choose which group to spend time with, but you found yourself headed towards the kitchen within seconds of contemplation. Sitting on a chair laughing at George's dumb jokes, egging Bad on, and laughing along to Quackity's contagious laughter.

You found yourself coincidentally seated beside Alex as you all continued to chat and mess around. After some time, the other three joined in, and dinner was ordered so they could all eat together after a long day of lazing around.

You'd all rented out the house for a few days before the convention in order to be able to enjoy more time together, so lazing around today hadn't really seemed like a waste of time, or like it could've been spent better. You'd definitely suggest actually going out for dinner rather than just ordering online for the rest of your stay though.

Before you knew it, chaotic dinner was over and people were headed straight to bed, a certain pair deciding to stay awake just a bit longer in the living room.

You rolled your eyes at their bullshit excuses before heading straight to your room. You quickly changed into sleepwear before sitting in bed and simply scrolling through social media. Honestly, you were tired but not to the point where you could easily doze off. Something felt like it was missing, and you silently racked your brain for answers while continuing the mindless scrolling on your phone.

About 30 minutes later, there was a soft knock on your door. Any distraction was welcome at this point, so you called out to let them know they could walk in.

Before you stood Alex, who seemed to be fresh out of the shower. He was in his sleepwear as well, but the beanie was nowhere in sight. His black hair was out in display, most likely to let it dry, but such a sight still had you in shock.

Not that you hadn't seen it before, but it always surprised you. No matter how many glimpses Quackity provided you with.

You stared in shock for a few seconds longer before snapping out of it and telling him to come in. He smiled and sat down on the edge of your bed.

"I couldn't sleep." He stated, before deciding to further explain. "I almost called you right now before going to bed.. I guess that's just how used I got to our calls-? But then I realized you're literally in the same house as me."

Ah. So was that what was missing? The reason why you couldn't doze off as easily? Because you weren't on call with him?

"That's true, I guess." You hummed before chuckling, "What's wrong with talking on the phone while we're here too?"

"You kidding? I'm not trying to be like Dream and Sapnap who still voice call and barely see each other even though they literally live together." You laughed at his comment, making him laugh as well at the absurdity of that situation.

"So what does that mean? You came to sleep here or something?" It was a joke, really. But I mean, why else would this dude be standing here by your door, talking about how he wanted to sleep call but instead found himself here.

"If you'd let me."

You almost choked at how easily he answered, was he joking too or was he actually expecting you to let him climb into bed? To sleep, of course, but it still had you taken-aback.

"You're serious?"

"Does it look like I'm joking?"

You stared at him for a bit before shrugging, "Get in then."

Nothing wrong with 'sleep calling' in person, right? Laying in the same bed, chatting until each other's voices lulled them to sleep. I mean, just because it was in person this time didn't make it any weirder. They'd slept on call together too many times to count. This was fine.

Alex smiled as he closed the door behind him and headed onto your bed, starting to get comfortable.

As you two lay there, you couldn't help but turn to your side and simply stare over at him. His hair to be exact. He'd never had it visible for this long, on group calls, normal calls, or just showing glimpses. It felt so surreal.

"What?" He mumbled.

"It's just- your hair. It looks so nice. You look nice." You smiled at the sight before adding, "You should do a hair reveal already so everybody can see this."

He turned to lay on his side as well so he could be facing you. "Hell no. Plus, doesn't it make you feel special? Being one of the few people who have seen it? Especially up close and personal."

The last part made you realize just how close you two had gotten within the last few seconds. Being at this proximity made you realize a lot more facial details you hadn't noticed before, probably due to camera quality and pixels.

Your hand slowly reached out, coming to a halt next to his head. He realized what you were trying to do and came a bit closer, letting your fingers gently run through his hair. After a few seconds, it all felt too natural.

There you were, laying in bed with Alex, gently playing with his dark locks as you talked about who knows what and simply enjoyed each others company.

This is basically what those late night calls felt like. Except this was definitely way better. It had the physical aspect of it that calls did not. You got to see him in such perfect resolution face to face, without worrying about any possible lag. You both were real. Basking in each others presences happily.

It didn't take too long for you both to fall asleep, and it didn't take too long either for your sleeping bodies to find comfort in the heat sources nearby.

What started as a simple arm draped around the other to steal a bit of body heat turned into having him close enough to smell the scent that lingered on him from his shower. Close enough for his grip on you to feel just a bit too intimate. Close enough where maybe their noses touched.

That was possibly the comfiest 9 hours of sleep either of them had gotten in a long fucking time.

—

The warmth you find yourself surrounded by makes it hard to get out of bed. As you attempt to fall back asleep, you realize that you're not tired. On the contrary, this might be the most satisfied (in terms of energy and sleep) you've felt in a long time.

What the fuck??

That's when that warmth you'd loved not even a minute ago comes to mind. At first you'd thought it might've been the blanket, but one glimpse to the side answers all your questions.

Alex was the one providing you with this comfortable and lovely warmth. He'd come over last night talking about 'sleep calling' in person. How could you forget?

The tension that had spiked in your body at the realization that someone was in bed with you oozed away as you looked at his peaceful state. He looked.. cute.

A few hair strands were on his face, and you couldn't help as your hand instinctively reached out to get them off his face. You hoped it wouldn't wake him up. He looked too peaceful.

As his face came into full view now, you openly stared, noticing the little moles he had all over his face. It was like stars splattered on the night sky.

As your gaze lowered and lingered on his lips, you realized just how pink they really were. And how unbelievably soft-looking they were. It brought you back a memory of his smile from yesterday while you both ate and watched the movie. You hadn't really caught the bit that had made him laugh since you were staring at him. He had a really pretty smile.

Your thoughts were interrupted at the realization that his eyelids had fluttered open, and were now staring up at you.

Oh God. You probably looked like such a creep right now. The heat that was rising up your spine and onto your cheeks must've been obvious, since he let out a small laugh.

"Were you enjoying the view?"

His morning voice took you by surprise. Sure, you'd heard it during calls sometimes, but this was on another level. It was wonderful.

"I was debating whether or not I should wake you up. You looked too peaceful." You answered, trying your best to steady your embarrassment. It wasn't necessarily a lie. He just didn't have to know all the other thoughts that crossed your mind.

He chuckled at that, before stretching a bit. "Thanks for letting me wake up on my own." He sat up, looking over at you with a small, satisfied smile. "That might've been the best sleep I've gotten in a while."

"Me too." You admitted, soft smile on your lips meant for him and him only. He stared back before returning the smile.

You two stayed in peaceful silence before deciding now was probably the best time to get up and get some breakfast with the rest of them. "We should get dressed so we can go eat."

He simply nodded before giving a small wave, heading back to his own room.

It didn't take long before you were heading out of your room and following the faint laughter into the kitchen. They were seated at the table, barely setting plates down and getting ready to eat. Just in time.

"Y/N! Good morning." Karl smiled, waving you over to the available seat beside him. Everybody else called out their good mornings as you got settled into your seat.

"Was wondering when you'd wake up." Sapnap mumbled from the seat across you. "You and Quackity sleep so fucking much."

You tensed a bit at that. Did they know you two had slept together? In the same bed? Had they tried waking you up and found you two together?

It's not what it looks like, is what you'd probably say as an explanation. Even if they didn't ask for one.

George nods in agreement, "Sapnap and I almost went and knocked on both of your doors. But we figured you both must be tired, so we just came to get breakfast ready."

Okay, perhaps they didn't know. Afterall, they were suggesting that Quackity was still in his own room. "I'm sure he'll get here in a bit." You responded, thanking Dream as he set a cup down on the table for you.

"Finally! Sleeping beauty chooses to come grace us with his presence." Sapnap greeted. You turned your head to see none other than Quackity flipping Sapnap off as he walked into the kitchen. He was dressed for the day, and had his hair hidden away with a beanie.

"How'd you sleep?" Bad asks as Alex finally sits down at the table.

"Wonderful. Best sleep I've gotten in a while." His eyes meet yours for a bit, and you can't help but smile at the implications of his words. You'd helped him sleep well. He felt comfy with you. He smiled back before looking back to the cup being given to him.

"Mm that's good." Bad nodded, before serving whatever breakfast him and Dream had managed to cook for everyone. Bad never failed to amaze you, talented as always.

"We were planning on going out today, is everyone up for it?" George asks, looking around the table for any signs of complaints.

"Honestly I'm all for it. I want to spend time with you all, exploring or just looking around." Sapnap answered, to which you cooed.

"Aww Sapnap, we'd love to spend time with you too."

"I'd fucking hope so. Now where did you want to go, George?"

"Dream and I were researching fun things to do here and we found a pretty good list. Just need you all to say yes and we can head out after breakfast."

He wasn't getting any no's, so the plans were set. Everybody ate their breakfasts before heading out the door to wherever Dream and George planned on taking them.

As you all walked to your destination, which wasn't too far according to George, you found yourself walking beside Bad.

"So, Quackity huh?" You ripped your eyes off from where they were to look back at him.

"Huh?"

"You and Quackity." He wasn't elaborating any further, which left you confused.

"What? What about him?"

"Well, you were staring at him right now and-"

"Oh. I zoned out, Bad. I'm sorry. Hopefully you didn't get the wrong idea." You interrupted him, letting out a small laugh.

"Well, that's not really what gave me the 'wrong idea'.. it was mainly the smiles and stares you two were giving each other this morning. And well, in general. Wanna fill me in on something?" He raised his brow, putting some space between you two and the rest of them by slowing his pace.

Your eyes widened slightly as you slowed down as well. "He was staring at me?"

He nodded, before adding "As much as you were staring at him."

You opened your mouth to try and explain yourself, before you heard Dream calling out to you two, saying they found the place. You gave Bad an apologetic smile before walking with him to where the others stood.

You'd come to a place with food, alcohol, and arcade games. You couldn't have expected less from Dream and George. It was perfect for this group.

You watched as Karl and George bought the cards you'd all be using to play the games. Soon after, they came back and handed everyone their card. Everyone was ready to split off to play different games.

"Y/N and I are going to fetch a table so we can leave our stuff there." Bad said with a smile. You looked over at him knowingly before nodding in agreement.

The rest of them nodded, Sapnap grabbing Dream's arm and racing off with him to the games. Karl, George, and Quackity went off to another game, excited chatter following them.

You walked beside Bad in search of a table quietly, watching as he looked around before finally approaching a table big enough to seat you all.

He sat down, looking at you expectantly. You did the same and cleared your throat as his gaze remained on you. You let out a small sigh.

"Okay, okay, I'll tell you." He smiled a bit at that. "I mean, he came to my room last night, said he couldn't sleep, and then we slept together. That's it."

You watched as his eyes widened slightly at the information he'd just gotten before your own eyes widened.

"Wait- no no! Not like that. I meant he literally slept with me. Like we fell asleep together." You could feel the heat rushing up to your face. "He said he got used to our sleep calling and I just let him sleep in my bed. It was really comfy."

You looked up, his stunned face making the heat rise faster. "Woah. I thought the cheeky little glances you guys were giving each other was things starting to get good, but you already shared a bed with him??" He let out an amused laugh.

"It's not that big of a deal, Bad. We sleep call all the time.." You felt sort of embarrassed, hearing his reactions and telling him things that felt more intimate than they should be.

"Uh? Not a big deal?? You're kidding right?" He let out a laugh, happy smile on his face. "You guys like each other!"

"Bad-! Keep it down please.. and we certainly do not." You were sweating at this point, Bad was so energetic and happy right now, and the thought of Alex hearing any of this had you on edge.

But the most discomforting part of it all was how much truth his words held. Did you actually like him?

"Am I lying, y/n?"

I don't know, is what you would've said, if it wasn't for the confusion clouding all your senses.

"y/n?"

You looked over at him, mouth slightly open, trying to form your thoughts. "You really think I like him?"

"I mean, I've been having a feeling. Since before the meet up."

What? Was it obvious for everyone? How had it taken this long for you to realize it? Those intrusive thoughts while you were staring at him this morning in bed. Had those always been there? Was he aware of your possible feelings?

"Holy fuck, Bad. A lot of it is starting to make sense." Your eyes were slightly wide from the fear of what this implied. What this meant for your friendship with him. "I-I think I do like him."

He seemed to notice how tense and shocked you looked, so he reached out and held your hand, giving it a comforting squeeze.

At the moment, you were connecting all the pieces, and things were slowly starting to make sense. Why you acted a certain way around him, random thoughts thinking he was cute, the need to meet him as soon as possible. God, why had it taken so long for you to realize?

"I mean, at least you ended up liking a nice muffin, right?" It sounded more like a question, which had you letting out a laugh. "What I mean is that he's a good guy, liking him isn't horrible. I can see why you'd end up liking him. Plus- I think everyone can see you two are pretty close."

His words helped ease the tension building up in your shoulders, but your head was still spinning. "I know he's nice, but in what sense? As in, I'll confess and he'll reject me nicely?" You paused, tensing up at just the thought of how awkward that would be. "I'd hate to ruin our friendship just because my dumbass caught feelings."

"Language." He mumbles, before letting out a small sigh. "He's nice as in he'll be understanding if he DOES reject you. But did you miss the last part of my speech? I said your friendship with Quackity is very different, anyone can tell you guys are really close. I can see where these feelings might've come from."

"Just because we're close doesn't excuse me having feelings for him. I mean, what does that say about me? Unable to have close friends without growing romantic feelings for them?" Your voice sounds hushed, as if it's dangerous to admit your feelings out loud.

"I'd say we're close friends, do we have romantic feelings for each other?" He asks softly, playing with your fingers absent-mindedly.

"I mean, I love you tons."

"I love you too, but it's not in the way you like Quackity, right?"

You kept quiet, gently biting at the inside of your cheek. Your brain was looking for ways to invalidate your feelings, tell you it wasn't right, but Bad was fighting through that and trying to reason with you.

"We both love all of our friends, and are really close to them.. but what you and Quackity have is different. I can see why you ended up liking him. Plus.. I really don't think he'd reject you. In fact, I think he likes you too."

"Bad." You warned, unsure you could handle overthinking the possibility that he liked you too right now. The realization of your own feelings was already too much.

"I'm just saying." He says, raising both hands in playful surrender. The sight elicits a small laugh from you.

But maybe.. maybe you were a bit curious. "You really think so?"

"I wouldn't have said it if I didn't. Plus, this is coming from someone who's been friends with both of you for a very long time. I see and notice things."

"Thank you, Bad. I really appreciate you and just‐ thanks for talking this through with me." It's honest and raw. He'd watched you sit at this table, trying to work everything out in your brain, and had just been endlessly supportive.

"Of course. I'm here if you need anything, alright? Now, just relax and let's go play some games, yeah?"

"Okay.. let's go!" You smiled and tugged at his hand, leading him over to where Sapnap and Dream were playing.

There was no way you were letting your own feelings ruin the fun of good food and some arcade games. You'd deal with that later.

—

Bad's advice and pep talks are top tier, but sometimes he oversteps. He doesn't mean any harm, but at times it is just too much. This is one of those times.

There's just a few days left before the big convention, and honestly the time spent together so far has been an absolute bliss. And well-spent considering you've all been out and about more often.

You find yourself in the living room with all of them, joking around and making up stupid songs while Quackity plays a beat he claimed to have made himself on his phone. It's peaceful, and no joke is taken too far. Until Bad starts trying to be the 'best wingman', as he likes to claim.

"Quackity, you should write a song for them, and perform it here in front of everyone." He says as he nudges you suggestively, a knowing smile on his face. It's so sudden and you need to make sure you heard correctly. You can feel yourself tense up at the thought of Quackity making a song dedicated to you. Specifically you. No one else.

Of course, it comes off as a joke, but since Bad knows you like Quackity it just seems way more personal. It seems like he's making it so obvious, but maybe everyone else is painfully oblivious. Clueless.

"Wow Bad. You just want him to roast the shit out of me, don't you? That's messed up." You make a noise of disappointment, trying your best to sound calm and collected.

George laughs at that, "Wowww Bad, that's pretty messed up. But you should, Quackity. Make one about Y/N and their muffins. It'll be funny." George didn't know a thing, but it felt like he was making it worse. As if there was a specific reason why they teased him into making a song about you.

With the playful cheering of everyone around him, he cleared his throat and a new beat started to play on his phone. Before you knew it, he was singing about your fictional muffins and how he would order a dozen, and found a way to include Rat slander in there as well.

Maybe you were stressing out for no reason at all. Perhaps you were the only one taking it weirdly and everyone else was just joking around making stupid songs up on the spot. You took a deep breath, and began to relax.

As the night continued, you tried to avoid any possible spotlight, focusing on getting George and Sapnap to go at each other, and the others egging them on so all you really had to do was watch the chaos ensue. It would all just lead to Sapnap calling the rest of them out and starting more playful fights.

As arguments kept coming up, the one you'd all been talking about on that one stream came to mind.

"Wait.. we still haven't done that height check between Quackity and Sapnap." Karl said with a shocked laugh. "How many days have we been together exactly?"

"Too long." Dream chimed in, eager to see the short people fighting over height they didn't have. At least not compared to him.

"Oh yeah huh." Sapnap said in realization. "Stand the fuck up right now, Quackity." He stood to his full height, puffing up his chest to try and appear taller or bigger.

Quackity rolled his eyes, "You guys only brought that up because I was clearly beating you guys in that argument."

"Okay? Stand up then."

If you were a person passing by hearing this conversation, you'd think a brawl was about to break out. Maybe you'd call security. But having context, it really was just Sapnap in his arguing mood, petty and trying to prove a point. There was no way he was sitting down until he proved he was taller than Quackity.

A small grumble of disapproval left Quackity's mouth before he stood to full height. Bad walked over and lead Quackity towards Sapnap, telling them to stand back to back so everyone could see the height difference.

You sat there in anticipation as Bad got them set up, watched as they compared heights very carefully, watched as the results were announced, and watched as Sapnap cheered and screamed some shit in Quackity's face when it turned out he was a few inches taller than Alex.

To make things funnier, Dream walked over in amusement and checked their height difference himself, making the other two look so much smaller than they already did. It was always a pleasant shock seeing just how tall Dream was compared to the average person.

This lead to height checks between all of them, trying to figure out who was the tallest (easy) and who was the shortest.

After everyone had gotten tired from the playful arguments and day they had, they began leaving to their rooms to freshen up or get comfy, probably needing a break from the banter.

Dream, George, and Karl had agreed to go pick up something to eat while the rest of you guys stayed in the living room. Just chatting now, relaxing, no height wars or petty arguments. Kinda.

"By the way, I found this one cool shop with a bunch of anime stuff. You're coming with me to check it out, right?" Sapnap asks, breaking the peaceful silence that surrounded you all while scrolling on your phones.

You looked up in confusion, not sure who he was talking to. His eyes met yours, and he gave you a look that said he was waiting for your response. "You wanna go with me?" You ask, a bit shocked since you'd expect him to go with Karl or something.

"Duh. We could look through the whole shop and see what we can find. Maybe go eat afterwards." He explains with a smile. He seems excited, and his energy is just so contagious, you can't help but smile as well.

"Well, since we're all here I'm assuming we're invited as well. Right, Sapnap?"

It's Quackity, inserting himself into the conversation, eyebrows raised and lawyer voice on, ready to fight Sapnap on this. This earns him a scoff from Sapnap.

"Don't think you'll wanna come with us. I know it's not really your thing."

"Sapnap, I'm sure he can join. Don't you see he's pouting? Plus, I'm sure food will cheer the baby up." You tease, watching as Quackity's facial expression changes into a scowl.

"Yeah right. Plus, it's rude to ask them out in front of Bad and I. We're literally their plus twos."

Bad snorts. "Plus twos? He's definitely not letting us tag along now."

Sapnap nods. "You literally have so many other days you can spend with them. Let me have my moment. Ask them out yourself if you want later."

You stiffen at the implication he's making, unable to stop the confused frown that appears on your face.

"Whatever." Quackity mumbles, before quickly switching the conversation to his beanie and what he should do to stop fans from snatching it off his head.

The topic of conversation is interesting, and quite frankly very funny, but you can't help but focus on Sapnap's comment.

Surely, he meant no harm. But you can't help the feeling that your little secret you'd shared with Bad was growing more noticeable. And if Sapnap knew? How long would it take for Quackity to realize and push you away?

"Y/N?"

You blink away your state of confusion as you refocus on the conversation. "Huh?"

"I said, how does superglue sound? For his beanie and stuff." Bad had been calling out to you, trying to reinvite you into the conversation. Apparently, you'd been quiet for a while.

"You're such an asshole, Bad. You just want to see me bald so bad." Quackity huffed.

"Not true! Also language."

Bittersweet. Your own thoughts were ruining the fun conversation your friends were having. How to answer this without seeming too obvious? Not like a pining idiot?

"I mean, so what if your hair falls out? The beanie will cover it. It's worth it."

"Plus," adds Sapnap, "your fans have been saying you're bald anyway. Prove them right."

"You're all no help to me and my problems." Quackity finally mutters, earning a laugh from the three of you.

His problems. You wouldn't wanna add another by making him have to deal with a friend trying to get out of the friend zone. You really need to get your feelings in check.

Honestly, you need to get better at hiding this shit. You can't just keep going quiet or getting lost in thought whenever someone suggests anything NOT platonic between you and Alex. I mean, it's ridiculous at this point. Bad is giving you stares, Sapnap might know by now, George might know. Hell, maybe even Quackity knows.

Too much. As soon as the others get back, you excuse yourself and call it a day.

—

Sapnap had been serious about going to that Japanese shop. He'd woken you up early, made you get dressed, and was dragging you out the house before the others could bat an eyelid.

Honestly? You'd had a lot of fun. Watching him look through all the items, picking out everything he wanted, getting matching plushies and these tiny figurines that ended up being too fucking expensive for their size. He'd been so happy, you even offered to pay for his meal in exchange for what he'd bought you earlier.

Throughout your adventures with Sapnap, you received a few notifications from Quackity, asking what you guys were up to, when you'd be back, and whether Sapnap was forcing you to stay over there with him. Sapnap and you rolled your eyes at that last bit, sending him a picture of you two flipping off the camera. All jokes, of course, and in return you received a picture of Quackity doing the same. Then he began claiming that you guys could stay there all day for all he cared.

"Seems like someone is jealous." Sapnap had said after reading Quackity's messages. You looked over at him in surprise before he quickly pocketed your phone, dragging you along to a new section of the store he'd wanted to check out.

Did Sapnap really think so? Could there be a chance Alex actually liked you, like Bad had suggested?

Beside your overthinking, the day had been well-spent, and by the time you got home, you were ready to get out of your outside clothes and into your PJs.

As you finally walked out into the living room, you watched with an amused smile as Sapnap sat with the rest of them, showing them everything he had bought at the shop, including little gifts he'd brought for them all.

No matter how 'careless', he came across, Sapnap was truly a softie. It was endearing watching him hand out the gifts you two had bought at the shop.

You made your way over to the couch, sitting beside Quackity and giving him a smile as he raised his brow. "Don't think I forgot that picture you sent me earlier today."

"You know I didn't mean it." You mumbled as you returned your gaze to Sapnap and his cheerful smile.

"You owe me an apology. And you need to make it up to me."

You scoffed at that, "You flipped me off too."

"And? You did it first. I'm the injured party here."

"Fine." You sighed, turning you gaze back at him. "How can I make it up to you?"

"Mmm.. how about we 'sleep call' again?" You froze at his suggestion, looking over at the others to see if they were listening in on your conversation.

They weren't, all too entranced with the small rant Bad was going on about a certain manga Sapnap had bought.

How could this man just admit that you two slept together with his whole chest. Without a care in the world for who was listening.

"Is that really all you want?" Stunned was the only word to truly describe how you were feeling at the moment.

"I mean, for now. I'll have to see tomorrow if I feel any better."

You rolled your eyes at that. He would most likely take advantage of that and drag it on for as long as he could. "Did you really miss me that much, Alex? Need to make up for the time lost today?"

"Wow. You're trying to make me look desperate now?"

"I just think that's how an outsider listening in on our conversation would interpret it."

"Y'know what? Let's go right now. Since you wanna call me desperate."

Again. Stunned. How was this man acting like it was nothing? This shit wasn't normal. Last time wasn't too bad because you didn't know, but now? You'd be too focused on not making it seem romantic, just purely platonic laying on the same bed together with your friend who you don't have feelings for.

It didn't take long for everyone to start heading to their rooms. He excused himself, and you followed a few minutes after, heading to your room in a daze.

As you waited for him to come to your room, you couldn't help but wonder if it'd be the same as last time. Would you be able to play with his hair or cuddle close in a strictly platonic way? Maybe you could call him bro a few times so it didn't seem like you liked him.

Your thoughts were interrupted by the door opening and revealing him in all his glory. He looked so comfy, and the beanie was once again nowhere to be seen.

Perhaps you were overreacting, but you felt this was his way of letting you know he trusted you. That he was truly comfortable around you.

This time, he felt more at ease entering your personal space. He got into bed and got comfy on his own. It didn't take long before he was facing you again, just like last time.

You smiled at him and did the same as him, your previous plans of putting distance and calling him bro getting thrown out the window at this new sight of him.

He looked so cute, just laying there and looking at you. He looked so warm too, you couldn't wait until you actually got to pull him close and blame it on your sleepy state.

"So," he started, "how was your date with Sapnap?"

Huh? The tone really caught you off guard.

"It wasn't a date. We just went to look at some manga he wanted, and got little gifts for everyone. Went to eat."

"Sounds like a date."

You narrowed your eyes at him. What the hell was that supposed to mean?

"Well, it wasn't. Why does it matter to you though?"

"It doesn't."

"Then?? You jealous or something?" You raised a brow, genuinely confused, but also wanting to see his reaction to the last bit. Maybe it'd give you some insight on his feelings for you. If there was any.

"I'm just making sure! Sue me for trying to respect anything that could possibly be going on between you two." He paused. "I wouldn't want to be asking you to sleep with me and then it turns out you and Sapnap are a thing."

You paused and simply stared at him. Was this dude serious? He was worried about you and Sapnap dating, when in reality you liked HIM? Sick and twisted.

"Well, you don't have to worry about that. Sapnap and I aren't a thing. I like someone else." You answered, and honestly you don't know why you said that.

He paused for a bit, expression unreadable before simply nodding. "And is it possible to know who this someone is??"

How did you end up in this position? It wasn't that long ago that you were confessing to Bad about your feelings for Alex while surrounded by fucking arcade games. And now you were in bed with him while he asked who your crush was. Leave it to you to mess up this badly.

You took a few more moments to just lay there with him, hand eventually going to his hair and gently playing with it. "I don't want to ruin anything." You finally responded.

It was the truth. You could just tell him, but you wouldn't be able to live with yourself if your revelation lead to him growing distant, or him rejecting you and ruining the rest of the trip.

At that, he sat up, making your hand slip out from where it had been playing with his hair. "Are you afraid you'll hurt my feelings?"

You sat up as well, staring at him for a bit before shaking your head. "I'm afraid you'll hurt mine."

"I wouldn't dare." He said reassuringly, hand reaching out to intertwine with yours.

It might've been the adrenaline rushing through your body, or the pessimist in you just telling you to get over with it, but you sat there and confessed that you liked him.

At first, there wasn't much of a response beside his wide eyes and stunned smile. You didn't necessarily know what that meant. Was he on the verge of laughter or was he shocked because he liked you as well?

The silence was killing you, and you swear you could feel tears threatening to spill as he continued to just stare. Nothing could've possibly been worst than his silence at that moment.

"You really do like me? Me, Alex Quackity?" Were his first words, and you watched as he shook his head, as if he was trying to make sense of it all.

"I don't expect you to feel the same or-"

"No no. You like me?"

He was trying to get you to repeat it, or admit it again, but it was torture.

"... I do."

He smiled at that, coming closer and using his free hand to cup your cheek. "Yeah? Well, it's your lucky day because.. I like you too."

You really couldn't believe what you were hearing. Bad had been right about him liking you as well. If he found out, he'd brag about being right and being the 'best wingman' for so long.

"Seriously?" It never hurt to double check.

"Yeah."

And with that, the distance between you two was closed. Soft lips pressed against each other awkwardly at first, not used to kissing your best friend, but it soon melted into a sweet first kiss.

After he pulled away, you gently cupped his cheeks as well, smiling at just how unbelievable this was. The guy you'd been unknowingly pining for this whole time actually liked you back, and you'd just kissed him on your bed. Bonus: he was staying the whole night for some cuddles.

You laid back down, pulling him with you and simply wrapped your arms around him, leaving small and shy kisses on his cheek, not used to this at all, testing what was okay and what wasn't. But his smile and kisses he was giving you as well told you he was more than fine with this.

"Does this make up for it?" You mumble against his own lips, teasing tone evident.

"Yes, yes it does."

—

The next morning was when the countdown finally came to an end. The day you'd all been waiting for; The Convention.

You knew this meant getting up, eating breakfast, and starting to get ready. It was a big day.

But when Quackity wanted to lay down for just a bit longer, how could you possibly say no?

This lead to you both having to walk out of your room and head straight to the kitchen 15 minutes later. There was no time to waste by pretending to have come out of your own rooms and at different times.

As you both approached the dinner table and sat down, you realized the table was dead silent, all eyes on both of you.

You looked up, making eye contact with Bad. He had this knowing grin on his face, and you couldn't help it as you felt the heat rushing up to your face. Quackity seemed unfazed by it all, simply yawning and beginning to eat his breakfast.

"So did it work or what?" Sapnap broke the silence, an expectant look on his face as he stared between you and Quackity.

"What are you talking about?" You asked, now feeling very confused.

Bad couldn't hold in his laughter any longer, and burst out into happy giggles.

"Well we were trying to make Alex get jealous so he could finally make a move. Did he do it?" Sapnap asked. Karl was smiling wide, trying to cover it with the sleeve of his sweater.

Did this mean that Karl, Sapnap, and Bad all knew you two liked each other? Had these three plotted this shit? Getting you two to realize your own feelings?

"What? You did that shit on purpose?" It was Quackity's turn to be dumbfounded.

"Duh. We figured we'd give you guys a little push in the right direction." Sapnap had a satisfied smile on his face.

You couldn't help but feel embarrassed. Your friends had worked together to make you both come to terms with your feelings. Since you two were so oblivious. Wow.

"I hate to say it since it means you actually helped,,, but it did work. We talked last night and well.. we both confessed." There was a soft smile on his lips as he told the others about what had happened.

Bad let out a small cheer, clapping his hands excitedly before congratulating you both on talking out your feelings.

"Okay now that the lovebirds are finally together, let's finish breakfast and start getting ready. Remember today is a big day!" Dream said, sounding quite excited himself.

You'd honestly forgotten for a few minutes because of the whiplash of your friends confessing they were playing cupid.

Today was the convention. The whole reason you'd all traveled out here. This whole trip had been lovely, leading up to the final event.

And you'd be leaving with a date, and good memories spent with fans and friends.

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ao3komorii · 3 years

Text

Tangling with the Lifeguard (Pool Party Sett/Reader)

The Pool Party Sett story is done! I’ve gone with a beach!AU sort of setting where league races exist in a modern-day beach sort of place. Also sorry to any MF or Syndra mains, they don’t really come out the best in this xD Hope you enjoy, and as always, there is a smut warning for the end!

---

The sun was shining high in the sky, crystalline waters lapping against the shore as beachgoers took advantage of the perfect summer day. Taking in the scene from your place in the shade of a tree on the border between the beach and parking lot, you let a smile grace your lips as you mused on just how much this place seemed to not change, even after so many years.

The last time you had set foot on this beach, you had been twelve years old, full of excitement and unaware of the harsh realities of the adult world. Your parents had brought you here for that summer, now thirteen years ago, the beautiful beach an unforgettable experience. You had left after that summer with treasured memories, and a new friend, that same friend the very reason why you had returned to Port Navori beach after so long.

Taliyah had been the same age as you, with fairly lax parents who let her roam the beach by herself, even as the small twelve-year-old she had been. You had bonded instantly, spending almost every day together, and keeping in touch through letters, and later emails and text messages.

You had long said that you had wanted to come back and visit the lively beach town, but the timing hadn’t been right, not until this year.

You were done all your schooling, and had quit your high-stress, low-pay job, and as Taliyah had said on your last phone call, you had no reason not to visit. Her parents had been travelling the world since they retired, so you would have her house all to yourselves.

In your absence, Taliyah had become a fairly accomplished surfer in the local scene, working at an ice cream shop on the beach to support her expensive pursuits. She had been so insistent that you couldn’t find yourself able to refuse her offer; work in the ice cream shop with her in the day, and then spend the rest of your time catching up with each other. You had missed your friend dearly, and had accepted the offer without a second thought.

And now here you were, waiting at the beach’s edge for Taliyah to show up. She had told you to dress for the beach, sounding casual as was her usual, so you had worn a swimsuit with a short, flowy shoulderless dress on overtop. Unwilling to look like a lobster by day’s end, you had carefully layered yourself with sunscreen, and now all you needed was for your friend to get here already. Just when you were about to get out your phone to text her, an excited call of your name had you re-stowing the phone in your bag and looking back to see your friend bounding across the parking lot towards you.

Taliyah, dressed in a two-piece water suit and carrying a tropical-flower-print surfboard, came to a stop before you, leaning her surfboard against a tree to free her arms to tackle you in a hug.

“You’re finally here!” she grinned, surprising you with the strength of her hug. “We’re gonna have so much fun!”

“So what’s first?” you asked as you pulled back from the hug.

Taliyah hummed. “I guess I’ll show you the shop.”

You followed her onto the beach, recognizing the small bright blue building from the pictures she had sent you before. Taliyah took you around the back, fishing a key out of her pocket before unlocking the door and leading you into the small room.

There were large tubs of ice cream in the middle of the room, the walls lined with containers of various toppings and machines. On the back wall from you were two windows, glossy menus pasted to the doors that would display out when they were opened. Upon walking closer to the menu signs, you noticed something.

“Hey, it says we open at nine, but it’s ten-thirty…”

“It’s fine,” Taliyah replied with a shrug. “The owners are pretty chill. If anyone complains, I’ll just tell them I had to train the new employee.”

You playfully rolled your eyes. Sometimes you really envied Taliyah’s ability to be so carefree. Her calm energy was a big help for you, having got advice from her on numerous occasions over the years.

Taliyah came over to where you were, eyes flitting boredly to the menu boards before turning her attention back to you. “So I’m thinking we get you taking orders while I make them.”

“Works for me,” you agreed. It certainly sounded easier than figuring out what a poro float was supposed to be. You never knew ice cream stands had such fancy options now, used to the simple menus of ice cream cones and bars back at the shops in your hometown.

You were about to open the order windows when you were stopped by a rustling noise from the back of the store. You turned to see Taliyah digging in a cardboard box in the back corner, pulling out some folded-up fabric that was the same sky blue as the stand.

“Didn’t think you’d get away without an embarrassing uniform, did you?” Taliyah teased, tossing some of her fabric pile your way.

You caught the bundle, unfolding it to find an apron with Poro Palace Frozen Treats in pink bubble letters, little white fuzzy animals dotting the apron. There was an accompanying blue visor hat that looked like something out of a kid’s store. You reluctantly slipped both items of clothing on, looking back to find that Taliyah had done the same.

“Stylish, huh?” she smirked, striking a modelesque pose.

“We look like we work at an amusement park, Tali,” you laughed.

“Feels like it sometimes with all the annoying kids that come by,” she replied. “Okay, you can open it up now.”

Taliyah settled herself down in a chair in front of the section of ice cream tubs, and you reluctantly turned to unlatch and open the windows, unsure of exactly what you were getting yourself into.

The small room lit up with the outside sunlight streaming in from your window to outside, the immediate glare of the sun making you wish you had worn sunglasses.

Almost immediately, the masses were upon you. You noticed a woman with several children in tow who perked up as she laid eyes on you, striding over to you with her children right behind her, pushing each other as they scrambled to be the first one to get over to you.

You heard Taliyah groan behind you. “Get the pen ready. They always have the most annoying orders.”

You rose an eyebrow, but picked up the pen and notepad that sat beside the cash register as the woman came to a stop before you.

“You know, I’ve been waiting for an hour already. You young girls don’t know how hard it is for mothers,” the woman complained, not letting you get a word in edgewise. “Alright, tell her what you want.”

“I want a brownie sundae!” a small boy with blue hair who clearly intended to make full use of his outdoor voice shouted. “But with cotton candy ice cream and pop rocks and I want only blue candies!”

“Uh…” The kid was talking too fast for you to write, but luckily Taliyah had your back, a got it ringing out from behind you.

You weren’t sure how you had managed to get their orders out before they melted, messing up their total several times before Taliyah had to come and help you out. With a last snide look and a fistful of blue napkins, the mother and her little terrors left the stand at last.

“She’s the worst,” Taliyah said, bringing your weary gaze her way as she cleaned off an ice cream scoop. “I accidentally put one red candy in that kid’s sundae once and he screamed until I remade the whole thing!”

You winced. “Feels like we got off easy today.”

“Yeah,” Taliyah agreed. “Helps that they order the same thing every time, so I’ve got some practice.”

“Are they all this bad?” you asked, turning away from the window after seeing no potential customers nearby.

“Not all of them,” she replied with a strained smile. “I swear the heat just brings the jerk out in some of the people here.”

Speaking of jerks… your conversation was interrupted by an impatient-sounding throat clearing noise from behind you. You whirled around to see a redheaded woman with heart-shaped sunglasses and a revealing swimsuit leaning against your counter. She was staring at you like you were gum she had stepped in, flipping some hair over her shoulder when she knew she had your attention.

“Five cherry snowballs,” she said, dropping a few coins on your counter, some of which bounced and hit the floor. “To the red umbrella, thanks ice cream girl.”

Without any further interaction, she turned on her heel and strutted away, hips swinging as she went, leaving you wondering what had just happened.

You slowly turned back to face Taliyah again. “Um, do we usually deliver?”

“Nope,” she answered. “Not to people like that anyways.”

“But…” you protested weakly. You knew Taliyah got away with a lot here, but you didn’t want her to lose her job because some rude girl complained to her bosses. “I’ll just take them over and next time I’ll just say we don’t deliver.”

“Still tempted to put rocks in their snowballs,” Taliyah joked as she set about piling the scoops of red ice.

Soon you had a tray with five cherry syrup-coated piles of shaved ice in little plastic bowls with accompanying little plastic spoons stuck in the side of the dishes.

“I’ll be right back,” you said, heading past Taliyah to the back door, opening it to find yourself back out in the mid-morning heat.

The sand still felt uncomfortably hot underfoot, even with your flip flops on. With how hot it was out, these would have to be delivered as soon as possible to not be a puddle by the time they were eaten. Your only problem was that you had no idea where to go.

The redhead had said that she would be at the red umbrella, but of course nothing at this ice cream stand would be that easy. Standing just outside the hut, you were treated to a veritable rainbow of colored beach umbrellas. You counted at least ten red ones scattered across the beach, none particularly standing out to you. You didn’t have many options, and were forced to go with the most tedious one; checking every red umbrella until you found the girl and her group.

The first umbrella had been a bust, as had the next five. The sixth had led to a sweaty old man who told you that you were just in time to help him sunscreen his back. By the time you had hurriedly fled from that creep, it had been about five minutes of searching, the snowballs on your tray looking considerably droopier than they had been when you had left the shop.

You stared down at the tray of melting treats, unsure of what to do now. Should you go back and have Taliyah remake the snowballs? Try a few more umbrellas and hope you got lucky? You really hadn’t been anticipating this much stress when you had agreed to work here with Taliyah for the summer.

You frowned at the now-more-water-than-ice treats, your decision made. You couldn’t serve these, not as melted as they were. You would go back and help remake them and see if Taliyah had any insight as to which red umbrella was the right one. You turned around to head back to the stand, only to trip on your overheating flip flops and fall forward with a cry.

You had closed your eyes with a flinch as you fell, but opened them with a start as you heard a grunt from right in front of you. Looking up from your position in the burning sand, you felt like your heart was going to stop in your chest.

Standing before you was the most attractive guy you had ever laid eyes on, with fire red hair and a pair of black animal ears that looked soft to the touch. He was dressed in a tight pair of swim shorts, a lightweight red jacket tied around his waist. He had a flower lei around his neck, but that was the only thing that he wore on his top half, his insanely-well-built torso on full display, a torso you realized with horror was currently splattered with red syrup and shaved ice.

You looked from the hot guy to the ground, the sand around you speckled with plastic cups, spoons and napkins, your tray turned upside down in the sand. You slowly risked a gaze back up, only to see the guy staring down at you from behind his pink-tinted sunglasses as a clump of ice fell from his stomach to the sand just in front of your hands.

Embarrassment forced you to spring up, grabbing some stray napkins from the ground and dabbing them against the mess of syrup and ice on the man’s abdomen.

“I’m so sorry, I–” You looked up from your apologizing to see the man silently staring at you, your hand freezing in place as you realized that you were basically feeling this guy up through the napkins, the realization making your cheeks burn with shame and embarrassment.

“I’m really sorry!” you cried out, pulling your hands back. He still hadn’t said anything, and you realized that you couldn’t just stand here like an idiot, your flight instinct kicking in as you reached down to grab your tray before moving around the man and fleeing in the direction of the ice cream stand.

“Hey, wait!”

The man tried to grab your arm as you passed, but you were faster in your embarrassment-fueled retreat, and soon the hot stranger was far behind you. You didn’t stop running until you were back at the shop, the empty sand-logged tray clutched tightly to your chest, your heartbeat pounding in your ears as you shut the door, making eye contact with a confused Taliyah.

“Hey, are you okay?” she asked, getting up to approach you when you didn’t respond. “Talk to me. What happened? If that snob said anything to you–”

“No, no, she didn’t,” you replied weakly, sinking to the floor with your back against the door. “I didn’t even get to her.”

“Then what happened?” she pressed, bringing you a glass of water and prying the tray from your hands at last.

She ushered you to your feet and down into her chair, taking a seat on one of the counters. You took a deep breath, taking a sip of the water before recounting the events of the past ten minutes to Taliyah, who listened silently.

“…I didn’t know what to do, so I just ran,” you finished, setting your water down to bury your face in your hands.

“It’s no big deal,” Taliyah replied gently. “Everyone has embarrassed themselves in front of someone. Remember that time I tripped over my board in front of that group of tourists?”

“I covered him in cherry syrup, Tali,” you groaned. “I don’t think I’m cut out for this.”

“It’s your first day,” she stressed. “You’re bound to mess some things up.”

She stood up, returning to the shaved ice machine. “Now how about we remake those snowballs and then I’ll–”

Taliyah had frozen in place, a plastic cup in her hand as she stared straight ahead.

“Tali?” you questioned, standing up. “Are you–”

“That guy you dumped the snowballs on,” she quickly interrupted. “Did he have majorly cut abs and animal ears?”

“Uh, why?” You felt a jolt of fear shoot up your spine as you followed her gaze to see the man from earlier currently approaching the shop, well-defined abdomen now minus the sticky mess you had spilt all over him. “Oh god, it’s him!”

You and Taliyah exchange wide-eyed glances before you dove down out of sight, hiding behind the tubs of ice cream like they were a fortress.

“Please get rid of him!” you begged. “I’ll do whatever you want, I just can’t face him!”

You heard Taliyah sigh. “Fine, but this means you’re coming stone hunting with me tonight.”

You agreed immediately, even if the prospect wasn’t overwhelmingly appealing. Taliyah was always eager to add to her collection of shiny stones, but was so picky that it often took hours to find just one stone that met her standards. But right now you were so desperate that you would have promised her anything just to make the angry hot guy go away.

From your position behind the ice cream tubs, you could only hear Taliyah’s voice clearly, the general noise of the beach preventing you from hearing what the furry-eared man was saying. You wanted to peek out from your hiding spot, but found yourself chickening out. You really didn’t need him catching sight of you and making Taliyah’s job even harder.

You had gotten so in your own head with panic that you had completely tuned out of your surroundings until a hand waved in front of your face and you realized Taliyah was crouching in front of you, calling your name.

“You okay?” she asked worriedly.

“Is he gone?” you replied quietly.

“Yeah, he’s gone,” she confirmed, standing up and grabbing your forearms to pull you up with her. “Now help me remake those snowballs and then I’ll fill you in.”

You bit your lip as you scooped shaved ice into a row of plastic cups as Taliyah readied the cherry syrup. Soon you had five pristine-looking snowballs on your slightly-sandy tray, the sight of them bringing you back to your moment of collision with the cute guy.

The tray was snatched from your field of vision by Taliyah, who headed over to the rear door. “Be back in a few. Try not to freak out too much while I’m gone.”

And then the door was closed and you were left alone. Looking over at the order window, you decided that you were probably safer to just resume your position behind the ice cream tubs, unwilling to risk being out in the open in case the guy decided to come back.

While she was gone, you couldn’t help but fret over exactly what had been said between your best friend and the mysterious hot guy. She didn’t seem to be upset, so clearly their conversation hadn’t been that intense. Or maybe it had; Taliyah was a fairly relaxed person, so it would be difficult for a random angry customer to really get to her. But that didn’t quite make sense either; if he had yelled at her, you would have heard it over the noise of the beachgoers. All you were doing was overthinking yourself to death, exactly what Taliyah had told you not to do.

And it was there you remained until Taliyah returned, closing the door behind her and placing the serving tray in the sink before she turned her attention to you at last.

“Calm down, it’s fine… I think,” she said.

“You think?”

“Well he didn’t seem mad,” she explained. “He asked if a girl that looked like you worked here and I said you went home sick. Said he’d come back another time.”

“Another–” Oh god. Was he really so angry that he was willing to come back just for the chance to yell at you?

“I can see you freaking out,” Taliyah scolded. “Don’t. You’re fine. Musclehead or not, he’s not going to kill you just because you spilled shaved ice on him.”

She was probably right; hot shirtless guys on the beach likely had more important things to do than yelling at clumsy ice cream shop workers. By tomorrow, he would probably forget you ever existed, and you could go back to enjoying your time working alongside your best friend.

The rock collecting that night had been long and boring, at least for you. Taliyah hadn’t found any rocks she liked enough to take home, only ending the search after she had found some sea glass that she had deemed acceptable to add to her collection. You could only hope that you wouldn’t owe her any more favors any time soon, unsure if you could survive another late night rock hunt.

The next morning, you entered the shop alongside Taliyah, who put her bag down and began to set up the day’s supplies. Considering it was ten minutes past opening time and Taliyah had insisted that she didn’t need help setting up, you decided that you might as well just open the order window for the day, hoping that mom and her group of demon kids wouldn’t be waiting out there, only to unlatch the widows and see something arguably worse.

The window had only been open a peek, but it was enough for you to see the large figure of the man from yesterday standing ten feet or so from your shop, his back facing you as he stared out at the beach. In your brief glimpse, you also noticed that the jacket wrapped around his waist had a white plus sign in a circle as well as the word lifeguard in white blocky letters above it. Oh god, of course you had gone and pissed off a lifeguard on your first day here.

You shut the barely-open windows with a too-loud slam that made you wince before you quickly locked them again and rushed over to Taliyah.

“Tali, he’s here again!” you hissed.

“Huh?” she replied, pausing her task of refilling a container of sprinkles. “Muscle guy?”

You nodded frantically and Taliyah frowned, putting the sprinkles down and approaching the order window herself. You watched as she opened the window ever so slightly, peering out for a few seconds before closing it back up.

“Well… can’t say I was expecting him to actually come back,” she said evenly.

“What do I even do?” you asked, staring at the order windows like they would burst open at any second and reveal you to the clearly-determined lifeguard. “He’s a lifeguard, Tali! What if he bans me from the beach?”

She rolled her eyes in response. “He can’t just ban you from the beach. Lifeguards don’t have that much power. If they did, I would’ve been banned a long time ago for all the times I’ve surfed after hours.”

“Then what does he want with me?” you asked, looking away from the window.

Taliyah shrugged. “You’d have to ask him that.”

“But what if I… don’t?” you replied weakly. “He’ll give up eventually, right?”

“I mean, maybe?” she said. “But it might be easier to deal with him now and get it over with.”

You saw her point, but it wasn’t her that was being pursued by a tall, muscly lifeguard with a vengeance!

Taliyah clearly caught the reluctance on your face and sighed. “Fine, I’ll switch with you for today. Now let’s go over how to make the basic stuff before we open.”

True to her word, Taliyah had allowed you to hide in the back making orders, telling the lifeguard guy that you were off today. You watched him walk away from behind the shaved ice machine, hoping that your ordeal was finally over, but your hopes were quickly dashed the next day as you went to open the store again, only to see the same broad back facing you from just outside the shop.

Taliyah had reluctantly agreed to switch again that day, and the day after. But by day four, even the promise of helping her scavenge for rocks again wouldn’t get her to agree to switch.

You closed the window again, turning to Taliyah with pleading eyes, but she was having none of it.

“It’s been four days,” she said, arms crossed. “Clearly he’s not giving up. You should just see what he wants.”

“But…” The thought still terrified you. You knew you deserved to be yelled at for what you had done, but it was made that much worse by the fact that the subject of your plight was just about the hottest guy you had ever seen.

Taliyah shook her head at you. “Okay, but I’m not doing orders again today, so if you want to keep hiding from him, we’ll have to move onto plan B.”

Plan B, as it turned out, was a mascot suit of sorts; three fluffy poros stacked on top of each other like a snowman. A poro each made up your upper and lower body, the last poro being the head of the costume. You looked incredibly awkward, the arms and legs of the costume hairy and tipped with little brown claws. You were momentarily stunned by the sheer lengths you were going to just to avoid this guy, but you were already in the costume, so you reasoned that you might as well follow through with it now.

Taliyah put the costume’s head on you and your world was plunged largely into darkness, minus the mesh one-way view out of the top poro’s eyes. You were helped to the back door, some fliers for the store shoved into your hands.

Taliyah helped you walk out front, and you were pretty quickly swarmed by kids. You couldn’t see the lifeguard guy, but the relief that coursed through you was short-lived, swallowed by the immediate explosion of business brought on by your costume.

One thing you hadn’t considered in your haste was the heat. You weren’t sure if it was the costume or if today was hotter than usual, but very quickly you found yourself becoming a sweaty mess under the weight of the dense, furry costume.

The longer you were in the costume, the worse you felt, but you were determined to stick this out. So you handed out fliers and posed for photos with children while Taliyah ran the stand.

You wished that you could wipe the sweat from your face, but you weren’t sure if you could even reach up to remove the costume’s head yourself due to the awkward shape of the costume. So you endured the ever-increasing heat, only feeling wearier as the time ticked by.

You waved goodbye to a group of kids as they left with their ice cream cones, the sweltering heat really bearing down on you. As you went to turn and head back to the stand to ask Taliyah to help get the head off, a wave of dizziness crashed over you. You took one step towards the stand, and then another, and then it all went dark as you felt yourself falling forward, too weak to stop your descent to the ground.

You woke up with a heavy head, feeling foggy with confusion. The last thing you remembered, you had been heading back to the stand…

Immediately, you realized that you weren’t at the ice cream stand, and you weren’t wearing the poro suit, or even your beach dress. Sitting up in the cot you laid in, you found that you were wearing only your swimsuit.

As you sat up, a blue ice pack that you hadn’t realized was there fell from your forehead and into your lap. Picking it up, the pack only feeling slightly cold, you turned to look around the room, still unsure what exactly was going on.

You were in a room of some sort, guessing it was afternoon by the minute amount of light filtering into the room, even through the closed curtains. There was a fan gently whirring above your head, but otherwise the room was silent.

There was another cot beside yours, and a table nearby with a few red first aid kits stacked on it, some bandages messily spilling out of one of them. There was a sign pulled over the door, the side facing you reading come on in, we’re open.

You got up from the bed, shuddering with disgust when you noticed just how sweaty your whole body was. The bed squeaked as you got up from it, your knees hitting a bedside table between the cots that you hadn’t noticed had been there. On the small table was a glass of water, as well as a white fan that was emblazoned with what looked to be a group of cats waterskiing.

You picked up the fan, letting out a small laugh at the silly-looking cartoon cats on the fan. It looked like something you could win at a carnival booth.

“If you can laugh, then I guess you’re feelin’ alright.”

A deep voice from behind you made you jump, fingers fumbling the fan, which fell onto the floor with a clatter that was only made louder in the quiet room. You turned to look behind you, only to fall off the cot in shock when you saw the very lifeguard you had been trying so hard to avoid standing in the doorway of a small office you hadn’t noticed was there.

“Hey, careful!” He quickly crossed the room to squat down in front of you, taking your elbow and helping you back up onto the cot. You were too stunned to resist and found yourself falling into his chest as a wave of dizziness hit you.

“You okay?” he asked, and you tried to nod, but your head was spinning too much to focus. “Hey, hold still.”

He placed his hands on your shoulders, keeping you steady against him until you were able to regain your focus. When he was satisfied with your condition, he pulled back, releasing your shoulders and instead reaching out for the glass of water on the table next to you.

“Drink,” he instructed, handing you the cup before standing up. “I’ll be right back.”

He stared at you for a moment before finally turning back and heading into the office at the back of the room.

You watched him go, feeling on edge, but complied, bringing the glass up to your lips and taking a long drink. The last thing you wanted to do was give this guy more reason to be upset with you. You were surprised at just how refreshing the water felt, and you had soon downed the entire glass, placing it back on the table when you were done.

“Alright, lay back down,” the lifeguard instructed as he returned.

“What?” you replied. What was he going to do to you? How had you even got here? Where was Taliyah?

He stopped before you, furrowing his eyebrows as he looked down at your shaky, terrified form. “Are you–”

“I’m sorry!” you exclaimed, bowing your head. “I didn’t mean to spill the snowballs on you! If you need to yell at me, go ahead. I’m sorry I didn’t just come out sooner and–”

It had occurred to you mid-ramble that he had yet to say anything, and you cut off your babbling, slowly looking up to find him staring at you with what you could only describe as a bewildered look on his face.

He blinked. “Is that why–”

“I’m so sorry!” you interrupted, bowing your head again. “If you want to ban me from the beach, I get it!”

“Ban ya from the beach?” he replied with a bark of laughter. “The only thing I wanted to do was get your number.”

“My… what?” You had to be hallucinating. There was no way he had just said that.

“Lay down first,” he spoke sternly, and you complied, still feeling stunned by his words.

Once you were laid down, he picked something up from the bed, which you recognized as another ice pack. He placed it on your forehead, the cool pack immediately flooding you with a feeling of relief. Closing your eyes, you let out a tired sigh, suddenly feeling fatigued.

“Get some rest, princess. We’ll talk when you’re up again.”

You took his advice, the cooling from the ice pack lulling you back to sleep, your eyelids too heavy to keep open.

When you woke up again, you felt infinitely better, your head clearer and body feeling less overheated. The ice pack on your forehead was room temperature, and it was now dark outside. There was a light illuminating your left side as you sat up in bed, turning to see the office in the back with its light on.

The cot squeaked under you, which was responded to by the squeak of a chair from inside the office, the red-haired lifeguard emerging from the office and approaching your bedside.

“Feelin’ any better?” he asked, and you nodded, biting your lip nervously. “Got you some more water.”

You looked over to the bedside table to see the water cup refilled and took hold of it, grateful to have something to focus on other than the intimidatingly muscular man before you.

You drank the entire glass before you forced yourself to finally address the situation before you. “Um… why am I here?”

“You passed out,” he replied bluntly, taking a seat on the cot next to yours. “Overheated yourself in that rat costume.”

“They’re not rats, they’re poros,” you replied, unsure of what to say.

He let out a huff of laughter. “Poros that important to you that you’re willin’ to fry yourself for ‘em?”

“No, that was…” you trailed off. Well, you might as well just admit it. If he had gone out of his way to care for you after you had passed out like an idiot, then he deserved the truth. “I was avoiding you. I was scared you were going to yell at me. My friend didn’t want to keep covering for me at the window so I decided to wear that stupid poro costume.”

“So that’s what that was about,” he replied. “And here I thought you were avoidin’ me ‘cuz you weren’t interested. Gave up on gettin’ your number and then got news that someone passed out from heat stroke.”

You were still having a hard time comprehending the asking for your number part, so you instead chose to focus on the other half. “Heat stroke?”

“Not sure what you expected, wearin’ that costume in this heat,” he said. “Can’t say nobody’s ever been afraid of me before, but giving themself heat stroke just to avoid me is a new one.”

He sounded somewhat self-deprecating, and you immediately felt bad. You had clearly misjudged him, and realized that he hadn’t even mentioned the snowball incident himself.

You forced yourself to meet his eyes, even with as awkward as you were currently felt. “I’m sorry for giving you so much trouble, and for spilling snowballs all over you. I’m just really sorry.”

He laughed. “Ain’t nothin’ for you to apologize for. I’ve had worse get on me since I started workin’ here, and usually it ain’t from a cute girl.”

You tensed in your seat, tearing your gaze from his to look down at your feet, your cheeks feeling warm.

“Hey, don’t go overheatin’ yourself again,” he scolded, standing up from the bed. “If you’re not interested, that’s fine, but I think it’s best if I take ya home. Don’t need your friend yellin’ at me again if you pass out on the way back.”

As much as you wanted to deny his assertion of you being not interested, you couldn’t muster up the courage, so you instead quietly accepted his offer of help. You would have to ask Taliyah what he had meant when you got back.

It was surprisingly cold on the beach at night, the icy breeze sending shivers along your skin. You stared out at the dark ocean waves, entranced by the water crashing against the sand, when your focus was broken by some soft fabric being laid over your shoulders.

You turned to look over your shoulder to see Sett just behind you on the steps of the lifeguard office, the jacket that was usually around his waist now laying on your shoulders.

He caught your curious look and raised an eyebrow. “You nearly cooked yourself to death today, I ain’t about to let you freeze yourself to death now.”

“Thanks,” you replied quietly, reaching a hand up to keep the jacket around your shoulders.

Your feet met the soft sand as you followed Sett towards the parking lot. The beach was totally empty, an odd contrast to how things were in the daytime. It felt weird to actually see the shape of the landscape unobscured by giant beach umbrellas and a sea of bodies. You only looked away from the empty scene when you realized that you had left the sand, and Sett was staring expectantly at you.

“…what?” you asked, getting the feeling that he had said something that you had missed.

“Which way?” he repeated with a quick glance at the street ahead of you.

“Oh right,” you replied. “My friend lives on Sandstone Way.”

Sett’s ears perked up. “By that tacky souvenir shop?”

“Yeah,” you laughed. “Right by there.”

You giggled at Sett’s assessment; you had noticed the eye-hurtingly brightly painted store when Taliyah had walked you to her house from the train station. She had rolled her eyes at the store as you surveyed the display of t-shirts with embarrassing designs on them, stating that sometimes they got some good rocks in, but it wasn’t worth the amount of tourists always asking for directions when she was walking around the neighborhood.

Looking over at Sett out of the corner of your eye, you were struggling to think of anything to say. He was dressed in just his sandals and shorts, his sunglasses forgone and giving you a clear look at his golden eyes that seemed to glow in the dark.

“So this your first summer here?” Sett asked, breaking the brief silence as you walked side by side. “I know I’d remember you if I’d seen ya before.”

“I was here for a summer when I was a kid,” you answered. “But everything looks so different now. Maybe I just saw this place differently when I was a kid.”

“Nah,” he dismissed. “It never used to be this busy here. Tourists bring money to this place, but it means it’s always loud around here.”

The conversation was slowly helping you feel more comfortable with the intimidatingly handsome lifeguard. You felt dumb for putting so much energy into avoiding him.

“So have you always lived here?” you asked.

“Born and raised,” he answered with a grin that you couldn’t help but feel looked a little sad. “Ma used to work at the boating shop… and the laundromat… and the candy store.”

“All at the same time?” you asked incredulously.

Sett shrugged. “Didn’t have much of a choice. Pa ran off on us when I was a kid, and it wasn’t like anyone would hire a fatherless runt to work for them.”

“Sounds like it was hard,” you replied. “Did you ever find out where he went?”

“For his sake, I’d better not,” Sett sneered. “I heard ma cry missin’ that scumbag more times than I can count. There ain’t a family here for that bastard to come back to.”

“How is your mom doing?” you asked as you turned onto Sandstone Way, passing by the tacky tourist shop, the flashy paint on the walls too bright even at night.

“She’s doin’ good,” he answered, finally looking happy with a satisfied smile. “Got her to quit her jobs when I started workin’ enough to pay the bills.”

“You’re a good son,” you complimented him. “She’s lucky to have you.”

You smiled at him, coming to a stop before Taliyah’s house. “Well, this is me. Thanks for walking me back.”

“Take care of yourself,” he said. “I don’t wanna see you passin’ out again.”

“I’ll try not to,” you replied. “No more poro costumes for me.”

“On that topic,” he purred, leaning closer to you. “You never gave me an answer.”

“An answer?” you squeaked, flustered by his sudden closeness.

“I’ve been tryin’ to get your number for days now,” he replied, and you did your best to supress a shiver from running up your spine. Was this real life?

You wet your lips with your tongue nervously, unable to miss how Sett’s sharp eyes watched the movement.

“I, um, I don’t have my phone on me,” you said, immediately realizing how dumb you sounded. You didn’t need your phone on you to tell him your number! You hastily made to amend your statement. “…but if you come by the stand tomorrow, I’ll give it to you!”

“Oh?” Sett’s grin was wide, gold eyes flashing dangerously. “I s’pose I could find some time to stop by. See you then, sweetheart.”

Sett turned to walk away, but you stopped him with a call of his name. “Wait, your jacket–”

“Keep it for the night,” Sett replied. “I’ll get it from you tomorrow.”

You reluctantly agreed, stunned silent by his bold flirting, his jacket sitting warm on your shoulders as you watched him walk away. You stared at his broad back until he was out of sight, only then turning to head inside, knowing Taliyah would be waiting.

The next morning she was still on you as you spent some extra time getting ready.

“I still can’t believe he gave you his jacket,” she teased with a grin. “I mean, I figured he was probably into you, but–”

“You what?” you replied as you paused styling your hair.

“I kept telling you to talk to him,” she replied. “No guy like that is going to wait outside your work for days in a row just to yell at you for spilling ice on him. But I didn’t think you’d believe me if I told you.”

“I just feel so stupid giving myself heat stroke just go avoid him,” you lamented.

“Yeah,” Taliyah frowned. “If I had realized it was that hot out, I never would’ve let you go out in that thing.”

“It’s my own fault for being so dumb,” you insisted.

“But hey, it all worked out, didn’t it?” Taliyah grinned as she slipped on her water shoes. “You’ve got a hot lifeguard coming to visit you at work today.”

“Don’t remind me. I’m still super nervous,” you said, adjusting your beach dress over your most flattering swimsuit.

“You’ll be fine,” Taliyah replied. “He’s clearly super into you. You should’ve seen him when you passed out yesterday.”

“What?” You had been so tired last night that you had only told her the basics before crashing for the night, completely forgetting to ask her what had happened yesterday.

“Someone got him when you collapsed,” she told you. “You should’ve seen his face when he pulled off the poro head and saw it was you inside the costume! I tried to come with, but he told me he’d handle it. I maaay have threatened his life if anything happened to you, but just a little.”

You laughed. So that’s what Sett had been referring to.

Taliyah came up from behind you as you stared at your appearance in the mirror, resting her chin on your shoulder and meeting your eyes in the mirror. “Relax, you look great. Fuzzy ear boy isn’t gonna know what hit him!”

“Fuzzy ear–” you sputtered, laughing at Taliyah’s choice of words. “I guess his ears do look pretty fuzzy.”

“Well if he lets you pet them, tell me how soft they are!” she teased, pulling back from you to grab her bag. “Now let’s go. You’ve got a boy to meet!”

You somehow felt even more nervous today than you had the few days you had spent avoiding Sett. You were still having a hard time wrapping your head around the fact that a guy that looked like he had walked straight out of a fireman’s calendar was coming to your little beachfront ice cream stand for the sole purpose of getting your phone number. And his jacket, which was folded neatly on the countertop beside you.

You weren’t exactly sure when he was going to come. Usually, he would be there waiting outside in the morning before you opened, but all you had opened up to today was a sparsely-populated beachfront, no handsome lifeguards to be seen. By two in the afternoon, your anxiety had begun to get the better of you.

“Stop pacing,” Taliyah scolded you. “He’ll be here.”

“But what if he decided not to?” you said, taking a deep breath to try and calm yourself down. “What if this was just a joke?”

“Then I’ll go kick his butt,” she responded plainly. “He’ll come. Relax.”

You were about to reply, when a ding of the service bell at the order window had you spinning around, ready to take an order, only for the words to die on your lips when you laid eyes on the well-muscled lifeguard with the fuzzy black ears just outside the order window, sending a grin your way.

“Here to pick up my order,” he said, leaning an arm against the window.

“Your… order?” you replied, too entranced by his appearance to properly make use of your brain.

“A pretty girl promised me her number if I came by,” he replied, looking down at you through his sunglasses.

“I… right… I…” You turned back quickly to see Taliyah staring expectantly at you, mouthing the word number at you. Right.

With slightly shaky hands, you reached for the small notepad at the front counter, taking that and a pen in hand and trying not to focus on the fact that Sett was watching you as you began to write.

Double-checking that the number was right, you handed the paper to him, your fingers touching as he took it from you. Remembering about your other promise, you reached over to grab the lifeguard jacket from the counter beside you. You went to hand him his jacket, surprised when he didn’t take it from you.

“What time do you get off?” he asked, and you answered a quiet six. “Give it back to me then.”

With a short wave and a grin, Sett made a show of stowing the phone number in his pocket before sauntering off and leaving you standing there slack-jawed.

“See? Was that so hard?” Taliyah called from her seat at the ice machine. “Now you just have to keep it together for your date.”

“I don’t know if I can,” you said, leaning back against the counter.

“You did last night, didn’t you?” she countered. “He’s just a guy. A really hot guy, but still. Don’t freak yourself out. You deserve a nice guy. It’s just a bonus that he has more abs than spiders have legs!”

You let out an amused huff. Taliyah was right, as she always was. You needed to get over yourself and let yourself have a good time tonight.”

But for now, you had customers to deal with. You and Taliyah let out a shared groan as you saw the nightmare mom and her army of brats heading towards you. You both returned to your posts, hoping their overly-complicated orders would be right on the first try this time.

Taliyah let out a yawn, stretching her arms high above her head before beginning the process of cleaning up for the day. After the last customer left, you hastily closed the order window, not wanting to give anyone the chance to come and beg about how it was only five minutes past closing and they’ve been wanting a banana split all day. You had learned your lesson from that mistake on day two.

Once the order windows were closed and locked, you joined Taliyah at the side counter, helping to return all the different containers of toppings to their rightful places. You found your hands moving slower, your nerves slowing you down in order to prolong the inevitable.

Taliyah eventually got tired of your pitiful attempt at stalling for time and gently removed the container of blue sprinkles from your grasp. “Just go, I’ll finish up here.”

“Are you sure?” you asked, and Taliyah sent you an unimpressed look. “Okay, fine, I’m going, I’m going.”

“I hope you know I expect all the details later!” she grinned as you made your way to the door, hesitating with your hand on the door handle for only a moment before opening the door.

It was mercifully less warm outside today than it had been yesterday, not to mention that you were also minus a heavy mascot costume. Yesterday hadn’t ended too badly for you, but you would still prefer to not end today in a hospital if you exacerbated your current heat-sensitive state.

You weren’t sure if you preferred if Sett was already there, or if you got there first to wait for him; neither option seemed to abate your nerves. But of course, the lifeguard was prompt as always, leaning against one of the beams that held up the awning above the order window.

You didn’t think you had been making much noise walking along the sand, but he seemed to hear you, turning to face you with a grin as you approached.

“Ready?” he asked as you came to a stop before him, tucking some of your hair behind your ear in an effort to keep your cool.

“Yeah,” you answered, impressed that your voice hadn’t come out squeaky with how nervous you were.

“Good,” he replied, before his grin turned teasing. “Was half expectin’ ya to come on our date in that rat costume.”

“Poro!” you corrected again, trying not to get flustered by his mention of this being a date. You weren’t sure what else it would be, but you couldn’t help the butterflies that fluttered in your stomach when he had acknowledged the obvious.

He surprised you by taking your hand, pulling you along with him as you tried desperately not to stumble and fall into the sand.

The beach crowd was beginning to thin out, people heading home or to one of the many beachfront restaurants nearby. Watching as a kid packed up his sand toys, you wondered if one of those restaurants was where you were headed as well. Sett hadn’t told you anything about what the plan was, and you found yourself curious when he led you to the bright white lifeguard office.

At first, you had thought that maybe he had forgotten something, at least until you followed him into the small building to see what looked to be the table that had previously held all the first aid kits, now decked out in a soft-looking purple picnic blanket. On top of the makeshift picnic table was a spread of various tasty-looking finger foods, the scene completed by two chairs pulled up to the table, cushions with a starfish pattern placed on the seats.

You were perhaps too dumbfounded by the sight, as you snapped out of it to Sett calling your name, looking over at him to see him looking surprisingly tense. You should probably say something, you realized.

“It looks great,” you said, meaning every word as you looked over the table. “Are those cabbage rolls?”

“Ma helped me make ‘em,” Sett explained, looking bashful for the first time since you had met him as he raised an arm to scratch at the back of his neck. “Helped me with all of this, actually. Never done anythin’ like this before.”

“You mean a picnic?” you asked curiously.

Sett chuckled. “Picnics. Dates. Not a lotta women ‘round here who wanted anythin’ to do with a fatherless half-breed.”

You had a hard time believing that; you had noticed several mothers checking him out as they packed their family’s stuff to leave the beach. But the hint of something sad in his eyes made you reconsider. You had no memory of seeing someone like him that summer you had spent here, but it wasn’t like that was a surprise to you. You and Taliyah had been in your own little world at that time, only ever spending time with each other.

“Well I’m excited to try your cooking,” you said, figuring a change of subject was for the best.

Sett grinned as he sat down. “Should be decent. Haven’t poisoned anyone since high school.”

Your eyes widened, hand freezing on its path to grab a cabbage roll, startled eyes darting to his.

Sett let out a bark of laughter at your alarmed face. “Relax. Wouldn’t poison ya. Maybe those kids that keep swimmin’ into the boating zone, but not you.”

“Thanks… I think?” you replied, biting your lip as you stared down at the cabbage rolls, weighing your options.

“Wasn’t real poison anyways,” he scoffed, taking some rolls from himself. “Not my fault sugar and salt look the same.”

You laughed, grabbing some food for yourself at last. “I suppose they kinda do.”

“Ma didn’t wanna hurt my feelings, but I knew when I tried some myself,” he explained.

“It was nice of her to try,” you offered.

“Too nice,” he said. “Ma is always too nice. Never said anythin’ bad about my old man, even after what he did. Had to work three jobs for years because of that bastard, but not a word.”

“Well I’m sure she’s glad she has you,” you commented. “Even if you give her food poisoning sometimes.”

“Once,” he corrected, taking a bite. “Learned my lesson the first time.”

You followed his lead, finding the food to be entirely poison-free, and actually the best home-cooked meal you had eaten in a long time. The conversation moved to swapping work stories, and you were unsurprised to find out that the mother and her the demon children had been a thorn in Sett’s side as well.

“They really buried sleeping sunbathers in sand?”

“Five times in a day one time,” Sett grouchily confirmed. “Last time Braum went to handle it. Said I would bury those little assholes under the sand if I had to go yell at them one more time.”

You sympathized with his pain. You felt lucky that you had only experienced the tip of the annoyingness iceberg with that group of little terrors.

“Braum?” you inquired as you both left the lifeguard office, the beach now fully dark.

“Fellow lifeguard,” he answered, nonchalantly taking your hand in his as you made your way off the beach. “Bald, giant moustache, even bigger than me. Better at the whole gentle-but-firm thing than I am.”

“Oh, I think I’ve seen him before. He comes by for poro pops sometimes,” you said, mind drawing a picture of the surprisingly friendly man in the small purple swim bottoms with a weakness for poro-shaped ice pops. “So are you the head lifeguard then?”

Sett considered your question. “Guess I am the boss of ‘em. All of the other lifeguards are always comin’ at me with problems to solve. The extra pay doesn’t hurt either if I wanna keep momma from feelin’ like she has to work.”

“Say thank you to her from me for the dinner. It was really good,” you said as you passed by the familiar tacky souvenir shop.

“She’ll be happy to hear it,” he replied with a soft smile that made your heart thump in your chest. “I know she wishes she had more to cook for than just me.”

You both came to a stop before Taliyah’s house, and you sneakily glanced over just to make sure Taliyah wasn’t peeking out from a window, which she wasn’t. You turned your focus back to Sett, only to find him closer than he had just been. How was he so good at sneaking up on you?

A large hand came up to cup your jaw, thumb brushing against your cheek, and your face was tilted up towards Sett’s. You were glad it was dark out, because otherwise you knew your reddening cheeks would be obvious.

“Still afraid of me?” he asked, voice low, lips so close to yours that you could make out a small scar that crossed over his bottom lip.

“No,” you answered, making no move to pull away as you stared up into his eyes. “Not unless I was about to taste your high school cooking.”

“Smart,” he replied with a smirk. “But I’m talkin’ about right now, because if you don’t turn and run into that house, I’m gonna kiss you.”

Your bag almost tumbled from your grasp, but you held fast as you stared at Sett, whose own had already become half-lidded. You had no words to describe how much you didn’t want to run right now, so you didn’t use any, instead angling your face further upwards, trying to make your willingness abundantly clear.

With a grin, he leaned down and kissed you.

Pulling back slightly, he dove back in, his other hand coming to your waist to pull you against him. You happily leant into him, your hands on his firm chest.

When he pulled back again, you opened your eyes at last, feeling almost as dizzy as right before you had passed out from heat stroke.

Sett looked content, and you were only hoping you looked half as composed as he did right now. He leaned back in to give you one more peck before pulling back from you entirely, the cold from the air outside immediately apparent as soon as you were minus his warm hands against your skin.

“Think I’ll stop by tomorrow,” he said. “Been cravin’ a cherry snowball for some reason lately.”

Sett was a man of his word, you learned, though you were less happy to see him the next day when he asked if he could order a cherry snowball served like last time, and then laughed as you had proceeded to sputter like a broken machine.

His visits became daily, sometimes bringing Braum with him, who continued to surprise you with the sheer amount of poro pops he was able to consume in one sitting. Quite a few nights a week, you had found yourself all around Port Navori with the half-Vastayan lifeguard. You were surprised at how supportive Taliyah was being, considering you had originally come here to spend time with her.

“Gives me more time to surf,” she answered with a shrug when you had asked her. “And maybe that boyfriend of yours can convince you to stay here after the summer is over.”

“Boyfriend?” you yelped, and Taliyah raised an eyebrow.

“You aren’t? I thought he would have made it official by now. It’s been over two weeks… have you guys even done it?”

“Taliyah!” you scolded her, switching back to professional mode as a group of people approached the stand.

As you helped prepare their orders, you couldn’t help but think about what she had said. You and Sett had kissed quite a lot actually, but he had yet to do more than that. But it was far too embarrassing a subject for you to have the confidence to broach, so you had resolved yourself to just be content with things as they were.

It was just your luck that right then was when Sett had decided to make his daily visit to the stand, approaching the counter as the other group left.

Taliyah apparently wasn’t done pestering you for the day as she sped to meet him at the counter before you could get there yourself.

“Hey!” she greeted Sett with a sly smile as you stood frozen behind her, nervous about her motivations. “You’re on your break, right?”

Sett raised an eyebrow. “What about it?”

“Well,” she said, in the voice you knew meant that she wanted something. “There’s a surfing contest I entered, and it’s almost my turn and it won’t even take that long and–”

“Tali!” you interrupted, rushing over to the counter.

“All I need is an hour,” Taliyah insisted, before pulling you beside her at the counter. “And she needs some help while I’m gone since lunchtime is when most of the people come by.”

“I’m fine, I–”

“I’m in,” Sett cut in, eyeing you with almost palpable smugness.

“Awesome!” Taliyah replied, immediately shucking her apron and hat onto the floor in her haste to get out the door. “Have fun, see you after I win!”

“Taliyah!”

Your call of her name fell on deaf ears as she already had her board and was out the door, leaving you standing at the counter with Sett still leaning against the counter.

Sett reached up to pull his sunglasses off, tucking them into his packet, his golden eyes fully uncovered and sparkling with mischief, the sight alone making you feel weary.

“Well? You gonna invite me in?” he asked. “Not sure I’d fit through the window.”

You scrambled to meet him at the back door, not wanting him to try and get into the shop through the order window that was less wide than he was. It was a strange feeling to open the back door of the shop to a guy that was almost too tall for the doorway, and another thing entirely to try and corral him into behaving as you tried to keep the ice cream stand functioning while Taliyah was gone.

“Aren’t lifeguards supposed to set a good example for others?” you huffed, wiping ice from your apron. At least he hadn’t made things truly equal and put cherry syrup on the ball of shaved ice he had pressed against your neck.

“Not when I’m off the clock,” he answered. “Besides, it’s my once in a lifetime chance to see what workin’ one of these is like.”

It would definitely be only one time if you had anything to say about it. If the almost-hour with him here had taught you anything, it was that Sett was not cut out to work in an ice cream shop.

The scoops of ice cream he doled out were easily twice the size of the ones Taliyah did, which made for happy customers, but a less happy bottom line if he was here for more than an hour. He was also lacking Taliyah’s patience, and you were forced to sideline him when an especially picky middle-aged woman came by who insisted you remake her smoothie four times until it had an acceptable pH level. The woman’s complaints had miraculously stopped the moment Sett had approached the window himself, becoming so invested in flirting with the handsome lifeguard that she had snatched her next smoothie attempt from you without complaint, not even glancing your way as she batted her eyes at him, only leaving when he excused himself with an excuse of needing to make more orders.

You approached Sett to check on him and found yourself pulled down into his lap as he leaned back in the chair.

Huffing, he pulled you against him, nuzzling against your neck. “Don’t know how you deal with that. Couldn’t pay me to make her damn smoothie one more time.”

“You get used to it,” you replied. “Don’t you deal with worse as a lifeguard?”

“Yeah,” he grunted. “But nothin’ sayin’ I gotta be nice when I deal with ‘em.”

“That’s true,” you laughed.

“If anyone complains, they can go somewhere else. Ain’t another beach within a hundred miles as well-run as this one,” he bragged, kissing at your neck.

As much as you were enjoying his sudden affection, you knew time was running low until Taliyah would return. You made to pull back to tell Sett that, but were instead pulled into a kiss that took you a few breathless moments to find the strength to escape.

“This Friday,” he murmured, face inches from yours. “There’s a party at the pool. You should come with me.”

You had heard about the exclusive pool parties on this beach from Taliyah, but hadn’t expected to ever get an invite. The pool, which was at the far end of the beach from the ice cream stand, was as exclusive as it got. Gated with walls so high that you couldn’t see in, it was the membership-only place to be for all of the elite in the beach town of Port Navori.

“Is that… okay?” you asked hesitantly.

“Why wouldn’t it be?” he countered, and you didn’t really have an answer. “It’ll be fine. Come. Have some people I wanna introduce ya to.”

The door burst open at the same time as you nodded your agreement, revealing Taliyah clutching both her dripping board as well as a shiny blue ribbon.

“You won?” you asked, trying to disentangle yourself from Sett, who reluctantly let you up.

“Easily!” Taliyah gloated. “Nobody else stood a chance. So how were things here?”

“The money ain’t worth the drama of this place,” Sett griped.

Taliyah laughed. “Smoothie lady come back with a vengeance?”

“I’ll take kids buryin’ sunbathers up to their ears over this any day,” he replied with a grimace, standing up and stretching.

At his mention of ears, Taliyah had brought both hands up to her own head about where Sett’s were on his head, and you quickly waved at her to cut it out before he saw. Thankfully she did, but you could tell that you were going to get asked if you had pet his ears yet as soon as his fuzzy ears were out of earshot.

“I’ll text ya the time when I know it,” Sett said, giving you a quick kiss on the head and a two-fingered salute to Taliyah before heading out the back door.

“So?” Taliyah asked, pulling the chair up to the ice cream station after she had stashed her prize ribbon in her bag. “Are they as soft as they look?”

“I didn’t pet them,” you answered.

“It’s been over two weeks!” she complained. “Has he at least asked you to be his girlfriend yet?”

You shook your head. “He did invite me to a pool party with him on Friday at that fancy pool.”

“Really?” Taliyah responded, eyes wide. “You have to tell me what it’s like! I mean, I’ve seen satellite photos, but it’s not the same…”

“I’ll probably be too nervous to remember any of it,” you grumbled.

“This is your chance!” Taliyah encouraged. “By Friday it’ll be three weeks. You need to ask him if he sees you as his girlfriend or not.”

You reeled back, waves of anticipatory anxiety rolling over you. “I don’t want to scare him off. What if this is just casual to him and I’m too dumb to see it?”

“Then you’ll know,” she replied. “I know you. It’ll eat you up if you put this much energy into a guy without knowing how he feels about you. So ask. If he says no, then at least you’ll have an entire store’s worth of ice cream to drown yourself in after!”

Taliyah was right. She was always right. You knew that you couldn’t keep whatever this was up without knowing where you stood with him. The more time you spent with Sett, the more you wanted, and if he intended to keep things casual, you would rather know sooner so you could make an informed decision.

So that would be the plan then. Go to the party, have a good time (and get some photos of the pool for Taliyah) and then ask Sett about the state of your relationship. Sounded easy in theory. You could only hope you could muster up the courage to go through with the plan when the time came.

After hearing that the party was to start at four, Taliyah had gone all out, closing the stand at two so she could help you get ready to impress the snobs. You hadn’t put up too much of a fight, happy to have her help and her company, as your nerves only climbed higher the closer it got to four o’clock.

“You’ll be fine,” Taliyah said as she styled your hair. “You’ll only feel worse if you don’t get an answer from him. And with how good you’ll look at the party, he won’t be able to say no!”

“Thanks, Tali,” you replied gratefully. “I promise I’ll get you a bunch of photos of the pool. And whatever else you want.”

“What I want is for you to stay here for good,” she said. “So really I’m just doing myself a favor by helping you. This place has been a hundred times more bearable since you’ve been here, and I want it to stay that way.”

“Still,” you persisted. “I feel bad that you’re going to so much trouble. If you want anything, just let me know.”

“Yeah, yeah,” Taliyah dismissed with a wave of her hand. “You should get going, don’t wanna be late to the fancy pool party.”

She practically shoved you out the door, and then you were alone, walking down the mostly-empty sidewalk. As you walked along the street, you couldn’t help but dwell on the possibilities. What would happen at the party? What would Sett say?

If he told you that he wasn’t looking for anything serious, what would you do? It was hard to have an answer for until you were in the moment, since a lot of it would depend on what Sett’s answer would be.

You walked through the parking lot, and then onto the beach, passing by kids building sandcastles and games of beach volleyball as you walked towards the end of the beach where the pool was. As you made your way to the fancier end of the beach, you began to notice the differences that marked the split between here and the side of the beach that you were usually on.

The shops on this side of the beach were much fancier, the sand littered with designer beach chairs and umbrellas. It was crazy just how different two ends of one beach could be.

The pool was noticeable from a great distance, or at least the wall white walls that surrounded it were. At least you weren’t going to get lost and miss the party entirely.

You approached the pristine white stairs that led from the beach up to the pool entrance, equal parts excited and apprehensive. The entrance was an open doorway, covered by a deep blue curtain and guarded by a muscled bouncer in white. The sight alone was intimidating; why hadn’t you just asked Sett to meet you beforehand?

You plastered a reluctant smile on your face before approaching the man. “Hi, I–”

“Name,” he interrupted, not looking up from his clipboard, sunglasses too dark for you to see his eyes.

Well it wasn’t like you hadn’t expected some level of standoffishness from the elite side of the beach. Keeping your smile up, you told him your name, waiting the prerequisite few moments for him to leaf through the list.

He seemed to have found what he was looking for, as his hand with the clipboard went to his side and he moved over to the curtain, pulling it to one side to allow you to enter. He had said nothing further, but seemed to be staring in your direction, so you took that as your cue and walked towards the now-open entryway and into the pool.

The entryway led into a hallway with pristine white walls, soft lighting hanging overhead. You could begin to hear chatter as you got closer to the end of the hallway, exiting into an explosion of sight and sound.

The pool was huge, and there seemed to be an intricate gold pattern on the tiles at the bottom. The pool was surrounded by lounge chairs and umbrellas, tropical foliage bordering the inner walls around the pool.

There were people all over, in and out of the pool. There was also a bar in the center which seemed to be very popular, as many people were carrying around intricate-looking cocktails.

More than the scenery or the people, your eyes were scanning the area for Sett. You checked your phone again to make sure, finding that it was the time he had told you to be here for. Maybe he was just running late or…

Your rising concern was broken up by the tap of designer wedges on the granite heading your way. You looked up from your phone to see two girls heading towards you, one of which you realized you had seen before.

The stuck-up redhead that had been the reason you had been out on the beach to spill the snowball on Sett in the first place was striding towards you, not a hair out of place underneath her likely-expensive sun hat. At her side was a lilac-haired woman in a swimsuit with a plunging neckline that was color blocked with various shades of purple. Together they made quite a striking pair, but your previous encounter with the redhead had you wishing that Sett would get here soon to save you from the impending conversation.

“Look, Sarah,” the purple-haired one sneered as they came to a stop before you. “So eager to pretend she’s one of us that she rushed right over.”

You took a step back, but that only seemed to embolden them.

Sarah lowered her sunglasses, staring at you like you were in her way. “Sad when they don’t know their place, Syndra.”

“Sett invited me here,” you replied defensively.

The women exchanged a pointed look before Sarah raised an eyebrow at you, a hand on her hip. “You ever think about why that was?”

“What?” you replied, unsure of what she was getting at.

“She doesn’t get it,” Syndra said with a cruel undertone in her voice that unnerved you.

“Look around,” Sarah said sharply. “Really look. Do half the people here look like they belong?”

You looked around, not sure what you were supposed to be seeing. A man with a hook-nose sat at the pool bar, flanked by women in skimpy bikinis. A humanoid form that seemed to be made of water conversed poolside with a large purple man in a ratty straw hat who was holding a ukulele. What were you supposed to be noticing?

“Sett is too nice to break it to you, so the job falls to me,” Sarah said with a smirk. “This is our annual loser fest. Charity case race. Bring-a-freak-to-work-day.”

“Pig party,” Syndra supplied.

“Yeah, pig party,” Sarah repeated, noticing your confused look. “Don’t know what that is? Poor thing.”

“I don’t–”

“It’s pretty simple,” Sarah interrupted. “We take half the summer to find the biggest freak we can, and then we bring them all together and crown a winner, and by the looks of you, Sett is really going for the top prize.”

You gasped, eyes wide, suddenly feeling like you were going to be sick.

“Aw, you really thought he liked you, huh?” Syndra mocked with fake sweetness.

“He didn’t… he never…” you stammered, clutching your bag to your chest.

“Well duh,” Sarah replied haughtily. “He wanted to win. Do you tell a pig when it’s about to become bacon?”

“What is meaning of this?” Braum accused, storming up to your group. “I have not heard of such a thing!”

“Need-to-know, Braum,” Syndra dismissed.

“And you didn’t need to know,” Sarah added.

You felt numb. This whole time… is that why Sett wouldn’t ask you to be his girlfriend? Why he never did more than kiss you? All this time, he had just seen you as a prize pig for an ugly date contest? It all made sense now, why he had been so desperate to get your number. He had never liked you… it had all been one sick joke. You should’ve known; nobody as attractive as Sett would ever see you as anything but a freak. And was too cowardly to come and tell you the truth to your face.

“Look, she’s crying,” Syndra taunted. “Don’t cry! Soon you’ll be queen pig!”

You couldn’t do this. You couldn’t stay here with all these people who saw you as less than human as your heart was breaking into pieces. You were so, so stupid, now wanting nothing more than to cry in peace. So you did, turning and running as fast as your legs would take you out of this awful place.

“Bye, piggy! We’ll ship you the ribbon!”

You heard Braum shout your name, as well as the cruel laughter of the women, but you didn’t stop running. Not when you got to the beach, nor the parking lot or the tacky souvenir shop, the sayings on the gaudy shirts too blurry to read through your tears. Your feet didn’t stop until you were at the doorstep to Taliyah’s home, out of breath, tears running down your cheeks.

The door opened, Taliyah’s face appearing in the doorway. “Hey, did you forget– wait, what happened?”

“Settrigh, stay still!”

Sett frowned, but did as his momma requested, allowing her to tie the ends of his hair after she had finished arranging it. He loved his ma dearly, but he really didn’t have time for her to redo his hair ten times right now.

It was getting way too close to the start time he had given you, and with how nervous of a person you were, he had intended to be on time, but that was before his mother had discovered the reason why he was cutting their visit short today.

Ma was aware that he had been seeing someone, had been ever since Sett had needed help making food for their first date.

“You do intend to let me meet her, Settrigh?” she asked, stepping back once she had fixed his hair to her satisfaction.

“Yes, ma,” he answered, standing up from the chair.

He wasn’t exactly surprised by his momma’s eagerness, considering this was the first girl he had ever dated, let alone considered introducing to her. This world was shallow; he had learned that early in life, which may be why he found himself so drawn to a girl who had put her all into having nothing to do with him. You broke up the monotony in this busy beach town and gave him something to look forward to other than seeing his ma for the first time in a long time.

Sett knew he was working on a time limit. You had mentioned that you had planned on only visiting Port Navori for the summer, and the summer was half over already, which meant his chances to convince you to stay were also halved, which is where tonight came in.

He had been taking things slow, not wanting to come on too strong and scare you off like he had watched happen to many a beachfront pick-up artist. He had been unwilling to rush things and lose you, but the slip of the calendar into August had forced his hand.

He would be lying if he said he wasn’t a bit apprehensive as to how today would end. How would you take him asking you to be girlfriend? He could only hope that he hadn’t misread you entirely.

He didn’t go to the pool parties often, but it seemed like a good way for him to introduce you to his friends, as they didn’t often all gather outside of those parties. He knew you would likely feel out of place, but Braum would be there, and he intended to stick by your side the entire time. And then after the party, if things went well, then maybe he would end the night with you as his girlfriend, but the party would be the first step.

As he left his ma’s house, he found his mind turning to the party. If you were wearing that red swimsuit you had worn last week, then it was going to be a difficult night for his self-control. His desire to take things slow had really taken a hit then, his only saving grace being ma’s lecture on being a gentleman pounding in his head as he tried not to look at how your chest was half-busting out of your top as you leaned over to pick a thread off of his glove. You were really too hot for your own good, which made him all the more eager to see you.

He knew he was running late, the party having started at least ten minutes earlier. It wasn’t his style to be late, but he was also pretty helpless to defy his ma. He only hoped that you hadn’t given up on him and left.

He took the shortest route possible, which included a short trek through some bushes that left him more leafy than he would’ve liked, but it was all forgotten when he spotted the stairs that led up to the pool entrance.

He was able to bypass the doorman who was only half as big as he was and seemed to be wary of interacting with him, stepping out of the way as Sett approached. He pushed past the curtain, hurried steps heading down the hallway. You hadn’t been waiting outside, so clearly you had been able to get in. He tried to fight back the excited grin that wanted to take over his face, but it was a losing battle as he entered the pool area, eyes immediately scanning the area for you.

“Your cruelty is unimaginable!” Braum’s booming voice carried easily through the air. “That girl has done nothing to be deserving of such treatment!”

What had Braum so worked up? Generally he was an easy guy to get along with, easily Sett’s most tolerable co-lifeguard. Not much phased him, which was a little concerning. But Sett had other priorities, the most important being locating you.

You weren’t in the pool, and didn’t seem to be sitting in any of the chairs. Maybe you had gone to the bathroom and would be right back–

“Well how else was she supposed to know Sett is too good for her? She clearly wasn’t going to see reality without a little help.”

Sett’s ears perked up, his attention snagged by the mention of his name, but especially by the latter half of the sentence. He turned around to see Sarah Fortune with Syndra at her side, who had her arms crossed and looked bored. In front of them was Braum, looking more irate than Sett had ever seen him.

“What’s this about?” Sett asked in a warning tone as he approached, the fur of his ears standing on end, leaving him feeling like he wasn’t going to like where this was headed.

“Nothing you need to worry about,” Sarah dismissed, flipping her hair behind her shoulder with a flick of her head. “We just showed a daydreaming little clout chaser the way out.”

Sett’s eyebrow rose. “A what?”

“Your ice cream girl,” Braum cut in. “These two have told her that this is a party for pigs. They have told her that you intend to bring her here to win ugly contest, and then she had run off.”

“What?” Sett growled dangerously, but the two women remained nonplussed.

“We did you a favor,” Syndra stressed. “If we get a reputation of letting just anyone in, then we’ll lose all status as members of the ruling class of the food chain. So we decided to throw this little pig party to make you come back to your senses.”

“You’re one of us, Sett,” Sarah added. “This pool doesn’t have room for little nobodies who don’t know their place.”

“Rather be a nobody than whatever the hell this is,” Sett snarled angrily, the full knowledge of the truth turning his bad feeling to a mix of simmering fury at the two women, and worry for you. He hated himself for being late and allowing this to happen to you. “Save your concern and don’t talk to me again.”

“But we were–” Syndra started, but Sett wasn’t in the mood.

“If you even look at her again, you’ll have me to deal with. And unlike that girl you just bullied outta here, I ain’t so nice.”

With that, Sett turned on his heel and stormed towards the exit to go do his best to fix this mess.

Braum quickly followed behind him. “My friend, I am sorry I could not stop them in time.”

“Ain’t your fault,” Sett replied. “Wish I’d have known. Gotta go see if she’ll even talk to me at this point.”

“I wish you luck,” Braum said as exited the hallway and emerged out into the sunny late afternoon.

Sett parted from Braum, taking the stairs two at a time as he surveyed the area, trying to see if he could catch sight of you. He quickly crossed the sand, making a beeline for the ice cream stand, even if it seemed like a longshot. He passed by a group of kids throwing sand on an older man sleeping on a towel, but ignored it and kept going. If anything was on fire, Braum could put it out. Sett’s sole focus right now was finding you and hoping you’d let him explain himself.

His chest felt heavy with anger and regret. How could he have let this happen? He hadn’t realized how cruel those women could be, and it had led to them making you believe he thought you were some freak he was using for convenience, which could not be farther from the truth.

Seeing those two talk about you like you were a pariah had brought him right back to when he was younger, to what he had endured at the hands of people just like Syndra and Sarah. People who had ostracized him, did their best to make him feel like he didn’t have a place here. Sett-the-beast-boy-bastard; the words had haunted him for a long time.

He had grown tough in response to the years of bullying, but you hadn’t. This was your first exposure to how awful this place could be. He and ma had dealt with it for years after pa ran off; he had nearly gotten expelled from school after a particularly bad fight with a kid that had made one too many nasty comments about his ma to his face.

Sett stopped, letting out a frustrated sigh as he saw the large closed sign on the front windows of the ice cream shop. So that was a bust. Without giving the store a second look, he continued on towards the rocks and then up to the parking lot.

There was only one other place to try. Chest tight, Sett followed the same path he had the night of your first date, the same path he took every time he walked you home. The walk there was one long blur, his feet unable to stop moving until the familiar house was in sight. Without a moment’s hesitation, Sett approached the front door, rapping his knuckles against the wood. When no answer came, he tried again, and after a few moments, the door opened to reveal Taliyah, who glared once she caught sight of him.

“What do you want?” she asked, narrowing her eyes at him.

“Is she here? I need to talk to her,” Sett said, urgency bleeding into his voice.

Taliyah sighed, stepping outside and closing the door behind her. “You’re lucky I’m even talking to you after this. You don’t deserve to talk to her if that’s how you let your friends treat her.”

“They ain’t my friends,” Sett argued. “If I’d have known they were gonna pull that shit–”

A sly smile lifted the corner of Taliyah’s lips. “Good answer. If you had said anything else, then I’d be slamming the door in your face right about now.”

“Then can I–”

“Talk to her?” Taliyah interrupted. “Nope. Not a good idea.”

Sett’s face must have taken on a darker quality, because Taliyah retreated back a step, raising her hands in the air in mock surrender. “Relax, tough guy. I didn’t mean it like that. But she’s a little too upset to talk to you right now.”

The information only made Sett feel worse. He wanted so badly to talk to you, to do what he had wanted to do before this mess had happened and make you his girlfriend. You had never felt farther away than you did right now.

“Give me some time to calm her down. I can get her to be at the pier at seven, then the rest is up to you,” she said, levelling him with a stern look. “I know this wasn’t your fault. That’s the only reason I’m giving you a chance. She really likes you, so try not to make her feel any worse than she already does. Bye.”

And then Taliyah was gone, retreating back into the house and leaving Sett standing on the doorstep.

“Brought you some water,” Taliyah announced as she entered the room, glass in hand.

“Who was at the door?” you asked.

She shrugged. “Someone looking for my dad. Told them he’s not here.”

You nodded. It was probably too much to hope that it would be Sett. You winced as you thought his name. You hated how much you wanted to see him, someone who had used you to win some popular kid ugly date contest.

So it had all been a lie then? All the things he had told you about his life, his family? Every time he had kissed you, was he picturing kissing one of those girls instead? Is this really what popular people did for fun? You felt stupid for falling for it, for falling for him. You were so stupid.

With some prompting from Taliyah, you took a sip of the water. After she had made sure you had drank the whole glass, she sat down next to you, taking the glass from you and setting it down on the bedside table.

“I should have known,” you croaked.

“Known that popular girls are bitchy? Maybe,” she responded.

“That it was too good to be true,” you corrected.

“You’re acting like you’re eighty,” she scolded. “There are other guys out there. Ones who don’t have shitty friends.”

“Yeah, I know,” you replied. “But I really liked him. And I didn’t even get to pet his stupid fuzzy ears.”

“Well if you’re joking, then you must be doing okay,” she said. “How about we go do something to take your mind off of things?”

You frowned, and she rolled her eyes. “Not right this second. I’ll give you until six-thirty to get yourself ready to go.”

Taliyah got up off the bed and headed towards the door. “I’m not gonna let your night be ruined because of a couple of snobs.”

She closed the door, leaving you alone with your thoughts again. You laid back on the bed, intent on taking some time before you got ready to just veg out. As much as the notion of going out didn’t excite you right now, it was probably better than being a mopey mess all night. There would be other guys; it was just a shame that you had liked this one so much.

Two hours later, you were walking down the street with Taliyah. Your getting ready to go had consisted of washing your face of all the smeared makeup from your crying, brushing your hair into a semi-decent state and then watching dumb cat videos on your phone until you felt like you didn’t want to crawl in a hole and die.

Taliyah had assured you that you didn’t look bad, which you might have believed if you hadn’t seen yourself in the mirror as you were leaving, but at this point you were beyond caring about how you looked right now.

Taliyah had refused to tell you where she was taking you, and so you were forced to follow her down the familiar path towards the beach, unsure of where it was you were being led. Part of you was worried that you might run into Sett, but then the more rational side of you took over; he was likely back at that pool, partying it up with those girls and lamenting that you had run off before he could win his ugly date prize. It was crazy to realize just how flawed your judgment had been.

You had expected to be walking onto the beach, as it was where you two usually spent most of your time, but Taliyah didn’t go to the parking lot, instead heading towards the rockier section of the beach. You hadn’t been over here before, only vaguely aware of the area as a prime fishing location, bait shops and the like lining the street across from this part of the beachfront.

She took you past the fishing spots, down to near the end of the beach, where there was a small pier that went about thirty feet out into the sea. Like most of the beach at this time on a weekday, the pier was empty, most of the fishermen also having headed out with their day’s catches.

Taliyah led you down the pier to the small bench at the end of it, pushing you to sit down. When she didn’t do the same, you looked up at her, confused.

“I’ll be right back,” she said. “I’m gonna go grab something to help cheer you up. You just enjoy the view for a bit.”

You decided to follow her advice, staring out at the water. There wasn’t much to see other than some boats in the far distance and some buoys bobbing in the water that marked the swimming section from the boating section.

It was kind of nice in a way, the calm waters helping you to relax as you watched the waves roll in and out. You stayed like that for a while as you allowed yourself to zone out until you began to wonder how much time had passed. Pulling out your phone, you saw that it had been almost twenty minutes, and yet there was no sign of Taliyah as you looked around.

You had assumed that she went to get you two some food, which likely was still the case. Some of the places here tended to have rather large dinnertime crowds, so a twenty minute plus wait wasn’t exactly unusual. You had no idea where she had gone, so all you could do was wait. If she wasn’t back by seven, you would just text her and ask what was up.

You let yourself be taken in again by the rolling waves as you continued to wait, trying to recall what kinds of restaurants there were on the beachfront. It couldn’t be that fish and chips place; Taliyah had spent a full half hour last week complaining about how stale their food was. Or the taco place, since it had been closed for renovations for the past week. You had been trying to think of a third option when your concentration was broken by someone taking a seat next to you on the bench.

You looked over, expecting to see Taliyah back with some food, but instead nearly jolted off of the bench when next to you was the very man you were out here trying to forget.

Just seeing him when you were feeling so pathetic sent a jolt of you weren’t sure what up your spine, your flight instincts screaming at you as you made to stand up, only to be stopped by a firm grip on your wrist.

“I know you don’t wanna see my face right now,” Sett said. “But I can explain.”

“Explain what?” you replied meekly. “Those girls explained enough.”

“I haven’t,” he insisted. “Just listen for a minute. Then you can leave, or punch me, whatever you want.”

You took a look around, still not seeing Taliyah anywhere. You weren’t sure what he could have to say that would make much of a difference, but you sat back down, and he let go of your wrist.

You turned reluctantly to face Sett, waiting for him to talk first.

“Never told ‘em to do somethin’ like that,” he said gruffly. “Didn’t even know about it ‘til I got there and you weren’t there.”

“But they said…” you started, taking a breath to keep yourself calm as you prepared to recount the hurtful words. “They said you were only spending time with me so you could win their whole ugly date contest.”

Sett’s eyes narrowed, the skin of his knuckles tightening on his curling fists. “First I’ve heard of it. Ain’t no way you’d ever place in an ugly contest anyways.”

His words threw you. “Wait, so you don’t think I’m ugly?”

He snorted, a grin playing at his lips. “Well I was plannin’ on askin’ you to be my girlfriend after the party, so nah, I don’t think you’re ugly.”

“You–” you gasped, pulse skyrocketing. This was not how you expected this conversation to go. You were half convinced you were experiencing auditory hallucinations until Sett reached over, pulling you into his side.

“This is my fault,” he spoke lowly. “If I hadn’t been late, I’d have been there to stop that from happening.”

“What happened when you got there?” you asked quietly.

“Braum told me what happened, then those two tried tellin’ me they did it for my sake,” he growled. “I thought I was used to seein’ through bullies from how I grew up. Doesn’t matter now, they won’t be botherin’ you anymore unless they wanna find out why momma says I got her temper.”

“Why were you late anyways?” you asked.

He groaned, leaning his head back against the bench. Even with the sun mostly set, you could clearly see a pink tone to his cheeks.

“What is it?” you pressed, curious about why the intimidating lifeguard was suddenly being so shy.

He let out a long sigh, finally meeting your eyes. “Ma was doin’ my hair.”

You looked him over, realizing that his hair did seem to be tied differently today. The only thing that looked the same was his ears, just as fluffy as they always looked. You could almost hear Taliyah’s voice screaming in your head to pet them. Speaking of Taliyah…

“Taliyah!” you gasped, trying to extract yourself from Sett’s grip, but failing. If Taliyah was to come and see you here with the guy she had taken you out to forget about… “My friend, she’ll be back any second and–”

Sett laughed, and you were immediately left with the feeling that you were missing something.

“She ain’t comin’ back,” he said amusedly. “I’ve got you all to myself for the night… if that’s what you want.”

“Taliyah set me up?” you breathed, not having suspected a thing.

“I asked her to,” Sett explained. “Wasn’t about to let you go ‘cuz of some shallow assholes.”

Taliyah was much sneakier than you had given her credit for, you realized, but you couldn’t bring yourself to mind right now. Though that didn’t mean you weren’t hungry, your previous stress melting away and removing the only distraction from your empty stomach.

“So,” you hummed. “Are you still going to ask me to be your girlfriend?”

You still had no idea what would happen by the end of the summer, but you really wanted this. You wanted him.

“Yeah, was plannin’ on it.”

You had thought about it all the way back to Sett’s house. Was it really for the best to go back to your city when the summer was over? Back to your parents’ house to find an equally demanding and unfulfilling job?

The more you thought about it, the more you wanted to stay. Taliyah was here, Sett was here, and other than your brief nasty encounter at the pool earlier, this summer had been the best one you’d had in a long time.

Sett seemed intent on giving you more reasons to stay as he was on you pretty much as soon as you entered his house. You had been standing in the entryway, looking at a picture of what must have been Sett and his mother when he caught you off guard, picking you up from behind.

You yelped, turning your head back to face him just in time for him to dart forward to snatch a kiss.

“You’ll have time to look around later,” he said as he walked down the hall, nudging a door open with his shoulder and then taking you into what looked to be his bedroom.

Once again, you were scarcely granted a look around before Sett had overtaken your attention yet again. You were swiftly carried over and deposited on the bed, Sett eagerly caging your body down against the sheets with his own.

“I wanted to go slow,” he said against your ear. “Didn’t wanna mess things up. But that’s not what you want, is it?”

“No,” you gasped as he snaked a hand under your dress, and then under your swimsuit bottoms. “I… I want…”

“This?” he inquired, thumb brushing against your clit, causing you to jolt against him with a breathy moan. “Waited a long time to hear that.”

Seeking more room to work, Sett pulled back to reach down and pull down your swimsuit bottoms, tossing them to the side. You watched with reddening cheeks as he returned his attention to you, head disappearing under your dress next.

His first lick against your pussy felt back-archingly good, but you didn’t have a lot of room to move with Sett’s hands holding your lower half in place. His tongue felt slightly rough, bringing pricks of pleasure-pain along its path.

Closing your eyes tight, you tried not to squirm, but it was difficult as Sett’s tongue prodded inside you before moving back to sucking at your clit. It felt good, almost too good, but you found yourself wanting more than his mouth against you.

“Sett,” you moaned. “Please…”

You weren’t sure if he got the message until you reached down to grasp at one of his hands. He pulled back from you, wiping one forearm against the wet lower half of his face as he sat back. His position on his knees on the bed allowed you a good look at the decently-sized bulge in the front of his tight swim shorts.

Sett caught your eyes, reaching one hand down to cup his cock through his shorts. “All you, sweetheart. Still think I think you’re ugly?”

You somehow managed to shake your head, speechless from his ardent display of his body. Sett seemed to bask in just how speechless he had made you, a sexy grin overtaking his face as he stared down at you.

“Couldn’t ask for more than this,” he said. “But if you want more…”

He was such a tease. With a burning face, you relented.

“Could you just put it in me please?” you asked, too shy to make eye contact.

“Can do,” he replied, and you could easily hear the smug satisfaction in his voice.

Without a moment’s hesitation, Sett stood up from the bed to pull his shorts off, wincing slightly when he pulled the tight fabric over his painfully-hard cock. Tossing the shorts to the floor, his attention quickly returned to you.

Giving his cock a few slow strokes, he watched you sit up on the bed. Feeling a burst in confidence from his display, you reached down to the hem of your dress’ skirt before pulling it up and off your body, Sett’s hungry gold eyes unable to look away from you as you moved onto your swimsuit top.

Once your top was off, Sett struck, pulling you towards him. Sitting at the edge of the bed, he pulled you onto his lap, reaching around to your front to cup your breasts as his mouth went straight to your neck. His hands were warm against the sensitive skin of your breasts, rolling your nipples under his thumbs as his teeth scraped against a sensitive spot on your neck.

You felt his hard cock under you and shifted yourself against it, Sett letting out a deep groan in response. You could feel how wet you were, but this wasn’t enough. You needed to fuck him, needed this building tension to come to a satisfying end for you both.

You turned in his lap, looping your arms around his neck and leaning down to kiss him. Sett was happy to meet tongues with you, one hand resting on your ass until you pulled back from the kiss.

You met eyes with Sett, who began to help you lift yourself up, lining up his cock with his other hand. When he brought you back down onto him, you both sighed as you were fully seated on his cock at last.

“Nothin’ else would feel as good as you,” Sett groaned as he began to help you move and up and then back down onto him. “Never wanted any girl as bad as I want you.”

You were much less coherent, moaning out his name as your hands grasped against his chest. With a further burst of confidence, you reached a hand up to his ear, running your fingers along the fur and enjoying the resulting groan, the next upward thrust of his hips hitting even better into you. Maybe you would leave this out at Taliyah’s interrogation later.

“There,” you moaned as he shifted you in his lap, his cock hitting even deeper inside you. “Right there, Sett.”

“You’re so tight,” he groaned, pulling you down into a rough kiss as he held you close, thrusting up into you as you eagerly moved along with him, needing to make this gorgeous man under you cum.

Sett came first, stilling for a moment before pulling you slightly back to put a finger to your clit, letting you cling to him as you followed him over the edge.

Once you had both come back down from the clouds, you were set back gently on the bed so Sett could run off to grab a cloth to clean you up with. You watched him leave the room, still having a hard time comprehending just how you had ended up this situation.

You definitely had some phone calls to make tomorrow. Your parents would be surprised, but you would probably focus on the Taliyah part rather than the new boyfriend part of your reasoning. Taliyah would be overjoyed for sure; you’d have to thank her for her meddling when you saw her.

As Sett returned, you realized something.

“Wait, is your mom home?” you asked in horror. You hadn’t made any effort to be quiet during sex, forgetting about his mother until he re-entered the room.

Sett laughed at your mortified face. “I don’t live with ma, so no.”

“Oh god,” you breathed in relief. “I was worried I was too…”

“She ain’t here,” he replied as he joined you on the bed, handing you the cloth he had grabbed. “You can be as loud as you want.”

You dropped the cloth, burying your head in your hands, Sett’s amused laughter ringing in your ears as you tried to content with just what you had signed yourself up for.

#xreader #readerinsert #league of legends #league of legends x reader #lol x reader #league of legends sett #sett #pool party sett #sett x reader #smut #pool party sett x reader

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captains-simp · 3 years

Text

Carol Danvers ~ Infuriating

Carol Danvers X fem!Reader Smut

Word count: 8,016

Includes: dom!Carol, captain kink, brat taming, choking, degrading, fingering, edging, nipple clamps, clit clamp, thigh riding, spanking enhanced with powers, vibrator enhanced with powers, strap-on gagging and choking, strap-on sex and overstimulation

[ masterlist ]

Buy me a coffee ☕

~ ~ ~ ~ ~

You hadn't meant to fuck up Carol's mission. You weren't that petty. But the look on her face when you disobeyed her direct order and took the shot was priceless.

You and Carol had never gotten on. The first time you laid eyes on her you were infuriated by her actions. The second time you met only amplified that.

You had been under cover for a year when she came along and screwed up your mission. It had taken a long time to be trusted by those you 'worked with'.

You had set up a buy with a huge advanced (and crazy irresponsible) weapons smuggling ring that would lead to you obtaining more of their weapons for SHIELD until eventually, hopefully, you would figure out the secrets to their operation and be able to take down the business.

Just as the dealers arrived at the abandoned warehouse Carol came flying in to take on the armed men, oblivious to the mission that was happening, in all her heroic glory.

"We got the weapons, it was a success."

After writing out the report and having a long convosation with Fury (most of which involved you describing Carol in ways Steve would have been outraged by) you had at least expected an apology from the blonde. You could still remember how that went down.

"It was not a success!" You almost screamed at Carol. It infuriated you to no end that after half an hour of talking she still didn't see the bigger picture. She really thought she had done the right thing.

"Yes we got the weapons - something I could have done on my own - but that's such a small part of the rest of what they're making."

"You don't know how much there is." Carol said, her voice as calm as ever as she leant against Fury's desk with her arms crossed.

"That's the point." You said through gritted teeth, determined not to loose your cool infront of her and Fury. "My mission was to find out and put a stop to it."

"There are guys in holding. They'll talk."

You almost laughed at that. "If I could ask them my way they definitely would." You silently cursed SHIELD's moral codes that stopped you from torturing the answer out of them. They wouldn't talk any other way.

"They'll talk." Carol said stubbornly. "And anyway, you should be thanking me for cutting your mission short."

And that was it. From that moment on you couldn't look at the woman without wanting to slap her. That had been months ago.

Despite you never hiding your dislike for Carol she never seemed to mind you. In fact, she tried to be around any chance she could. Always looking for ways to get on your final nerve, everything she did she did for your reactions that you had grown worse at suppressing.

You took some of it out on her during training. It bothered her but thrilled you that you too were on the same level in combat. Apart from the times she was a sore looser and used her powers.

But you had made a strong effort to avoid training with her too. She taunted you during fighting. Although you were used to it it struck different when her body was pressed against yours to pin you to the floor.

Your most shameful day was when her actions had sent a jolt to your core that you couldn't deny.

Carol looked down at you with an insanely arrogant smirk as she straddled your waist. She was always like this in her moments of victory, always wanting to rub it in.

"Wow, you gave in quickly today." She quipped, not even trying to hide the obvious undertones. That didn't even make sense!

You weren't about to give in when she looked so god damn smug. You gripped her shirt with two hands and lifted your hips to flip her off but she caught on both too quickly and too late. She lurched forward into your grip but instantly pinned your hands above your head as her legs fell down next to yours.

Your breath hitched in your throat when you realised her face was inches from your own, it was only then that you become aware of the darker specs of brown in her eyes that highlighted the lighter shades. They were beau- okay. They were okay eyes. Yours were better.

The corner of her mouth raised in her familiar smirk that you always despised. But being that close brought light to how soft her lips looked. They were slightly parted and you wondered what kind of things she could do with that mouth. Professional things of course. Strictly professional and tactical thing. Not sinful things at all...

You wanted those thoughts banished from your head immediately. You wanted to leave.

All too hastily, you tried to raise your hips again, only then noticing how Carol's new position had her core right over yours. The contact and friction was undeniable, as was the slow throbbing that started.

A quiet moan slipped from your mouth that you desperetly coughed to cover up. You turned your head to the side, not wanting to see if Carol had noticed.

"Get off me, Carol." You huffed, trying to hide your embarrassment.

"What? You don't like me ontop of you?" She smirked.

God you definetly did.

As much as you tried to ignore that memory and replace it with the time you were first introduced you rarely succeeded. And even then it was like your hatred for her only encouraged how much you wanted to feel her deep insi-

"Are you even listening to me?!" Carol yelled at you with a glare. You never zoned out during meetings. Carol knew that. Fury knew that. Yet it was still very clear you just had.

"Are you done rambling?" You quipped, not having a moment to place the filter over your mouth as the thought spilled out.

Fury arched a brow at the question and Carol's jaw clenched in an annoyingly attractive way. You did not regret that one bit.

"If I hadn't taken the shot the hostages would have died."

"They almost did anyway."

"Almost."

There had been some sort of detonator with the man holding the hostages. Once dead, the storage he had loaded into his truck had been destroyed and nothing was salvageable. That was important cargo, but you always put a priority on lives. Taking the bad ones more than saving the good ones admittedly.

Once a vigilante always a vigilante.

"I don't think you understand how valuable that cargo was."

The meeting continued like that for a while. You would never admit it to anyone, especially as fucking up the mission wasn't intentional, but seeing how the tables had turned from the last time the three of you were in that office? It made you happier than it should have.

You guessed the two of you were even now. Maybe she would finally leave you alone. Your happiness faulted at that thought.

Finally, Fury told you and Carol to go and that it would be discussed again tomorrow. He was clearly tired. It had been a long day and it was late, everyone else was already asleep.

Even as you trudged down the hallway Carol continued to rant about your inability to follow orders. You would be the first to admit you weren't a team player. You still weren't used to it. But you always follow orders.

"I can follow orders, Captain. I just choose not to follow yours." You said calmly as approached the hallway towards your room.

You hated that Carol's room was next to yours. You had been there when Carol had talked to Tony about staying at the Avengers compound. You had seen her sly smirk as she pointed out on the compound map which room she wanted. Knowing full damn well it was next to yours.

How long did she plan to keep this up? You definetly didn't bug her about her screw up as long as she was you. Why couldn't she just hold the grudge in silence like you?

"You put aside personal matters when you go on a mission, y/n." She continue to scorn.

"Not personal, Captain. I just know when a decision and order is bullshit." Your room finally came into your line of sight. Just a few more meters.

"It wasn't bullshit. It was the right call. You just refuse to do what I tell you to." You rolled your eyes at her insistence, something that didn't go unnoticed by the blonde.

"The whole thing would have been fucked if I followed your orders. You should be thanking me." You taunted with a smile. But before you could fully bathe in your victory of getting under her skin, Carol gripped your neck tightly and slammed you into the wall.

You eyes widened as your back hit the wall painfully and you struggled to comprehend that Carol's hand was really around your neck...and you liked it.

"What? Got nothing to say to your Captain now?" She smirked. A familiar jolt travelled throughout your body and rested between your legs at her words.

It wasn't hard to put two and two together. Her hand, her words and the tone that accompanied them. You could always tell Carol was a top, but a dom?!

"If I could go back..." You started, your voice quiet with an edge of fear that made Carol preen. "And do the mission again...." Carol watched your face intently, awaiting your words of apology. "I still wouldn't follow your orders. Because I don't take orders from yo-" Carol stepped forward and forced one of her legs between yours.

You bit you lip to stop yourself moaning at the friction she was causing, the urge to grind against her leg was strong.

"Brat." She whispered with poison dripping from her voice. Her warm breath hit the small area of skin her hand wasn't covering and her hair tickled you chin.

"I have just the thing to deal with that. You wont be keeping up that facade for long."

You were about to object and assure her you would. That your stubbornness was just as strong as hers and you had been down this road before with others.

As she moved away from you she gripped your shirt in her closed fist and pulled you away from the wall with her. You hated that you instantly missed the contact of her thigh between yours. But her rough nature was doing it for you too. It had been so long since someone had been rough with you and you yearned to feel that again.

Carol had barely opened her door when she pushed you through the gap into her room. You were about to take in your surroundings and even pause to assess what was happening, but Carol's hands were on you again and all doubt slipped from your mind.

The next thing you knew your face was engulfed by soft pillows before you felt Carol's strong presence above you.

You could feel her knees on either side of your waist, pressed against you as though caging you beneath her. Her hands entwined with the back of your own and held them above your head under the pillows.

You went to move your hips up out of instinct from your training but Carol was too strong. She didn't even flinch from you efforts, clearly overpowering you in strength.

You reminded yourself you would not, under any circumstances, let Carol win.

You wouldn't apologise for the mission, wouldn't do what she said and you would not fully submit to her. It was something you truly believed, Carol knew this and it made everything you eventually did all the more worthit.

You could never imagine or anticipate the things you would let her do to you that night or the desperate way you would beg her to do them.

Her hair tickled your exposed neck as she leant down to whisper into your ear. "Anything you want to say to me before I begin? Perhaps an apology?" Carol questioned, knowing you would say no such thing but wanting to have more ammunition for later on.

You chuckled into the pillows before replying. "Go fuck yourself." It was muffled. But Carol understood.

She didn't reply verbally, instead she leant further against your body as her hands left yours and wandered down your arms.

Carol inhaled the scent around your neck as her hands reached your shoulders and decended to trace your collarbones that were visible from your shirt being lowered.

The blonde took her time memorizing every inch of your body, especially cupping your clothed breasts in her hands and ever so slightly grinding herself against you as she did so.

You reminded yourself to control your breathing as you felt those motions, not allowing yourself to be caught up in the firm grip of her hands against your breasts or the way she used your body to gain some friction to her core.

Her hands continued to massage your lower stomach, admiring the feel of your finally formed abs in a way she never could when you trained.

You kept your head amongst the pillows when her fingers danced around the waistband of your trousers. You didn't want Carol to see the anticipating look on your face at the touch of her fingers. They barely dipped half an inch beneath your trousers and panties but the contract gave you chills. You wanted to feel her against your bare skin more.

Carol retracted her fingers and instead wordlessly moved them to the centre of your trousers and unbuttoned them. You could hear her pull your zip down in the deafening silence of the room and you found yourself holding your breath in anticipation again.

She didn't hesitate once in her movements. With undeniable certainty, Carol slipped her hand under your trousers and panties to meet the space between your legs that welcomed her.

Carol sighed into the crook your neck as her fingers met your wetness between your slick lips. You bit your lip to stop any sounds escaping your mouth as the arrogant hero swiped a single finger slowly through your eager folds. She collected the arousal on her fingers before pressing it firmly to your clit.

Your hips rolled into her hand before you could stop them and the action caused a smug grin from Carol that although you couldn't see, you could feel against your skin. It was considerably worse and amplified your arousal as Carol could tell.

You hated feuling her ego. You hated that she had made you so wet your throbbing clit would slip around her fingers when she had barely touched you.

"Such a wet little brat. You're so ready for me and I've barely touched you." Carol husked as her finger continued to alter between running through your folds and rubbing your clit lightly.

It took every ounce of self control in your body not to squirm against her or make any noise. Your pride helped you keep those actions at bay.

Carol gripped your chin with her free hand and turned your head away from the pillow. You tried to avoid making eye contact with the blonde, knowing it would make your self control waver, but her hand continued to guide your line of sight to her enchanting gaze.

Her face was so close to yours you were completely caught off guard when Carol's finger pushed inside you and was engulfed by your lower lips with ease.

You bit your lip hard at the action, still staring into Carol's eyes and refusing to be the one to look away first. The intense eye contact did you no favours in holding off your verbal signs of arousal, especially when her single digit curled to brush your most pleasurable spot.

You gave a breathy moan when Carol held her finger against your g-spot for a long moment before withdrawing it, your eyes marginally widening as you adjusted to the pleasure, something Carol wouldn't have noticed if your faces weren't so close.

Her finger pushed back in at a slow pace but always stroked the back of your pussy in an angelic way.

You moaned louder when Carol returned with two fingers, the additional surface area made the experience all the more pleasurable and you feared how quickly you would cum.

Carol studied your facial expressions as she fingered you slowly, figuring out the spots that made you preen in pleasure the most and even the best angles to approach it.

It didn't take her long to understand the eb and flow of your pussy better than anyone ever had. With this powerful knowledge, Carol's pace suddenly increased in an overwhelming way you could barely adjust to.

She fucked you hard and fast with her fingers. Her wrist twisted in the most agile ways that caused her fingers to burry deep within you.

You moaned continuously as you stared into Carol's brown eyes you were beginning to remember better than your own.

The pleasure was immense and you knew your orgasm would hit you hard. Your breathing became rapid and your walls clenched down on Carol's fingers desperetly as your body prepared for your release.

Carol's fingers increased in pace as she gripped your chin harder, ensuring you look at her as her smirk finally returned.

Just as you were about to explode around Carol's fingers she retracted them from your throbbing pussy and brought them up to her lips as she grinned at you.

"Carol!" You protested in disbelief and annoyance.

"What? You didn't really think I would let you cum so soon did you? You haven't earned the right. Unless, of course, you'd like to make an apology." Carol said as her eyes bore deep into yours.

"Like hell I will." You groaned.

Carol clicked her tongue in disapproval before finally looking away from you. Her fingers returned to your waistband, only this time she pulled your trousers down swiftly, deliberately leaving your soaking panties clinging to you.

She then got off the bed and strolled confidently towards her walk in closet for a few seconds, returning with a few pieces of metal you weren't surprised to be seeing yet still gave you goosebumps. Carol's keen eyes seemed to notice this and she grinned knowingly to herself.

You shifted onto your side to get a clearer view of the devices attached to the long silver chain, once Carol reached your side she roughly forced your shoulder down so you were laying on your back.

"You're very pushy you know?" You quipped as Carol moved to straddle you hips and placed the metal beside you.

Her jaw clenched tightly in annoyance of your words but she didn't look at you, instead running her hands along your lower abdomen beneath your shirt. Seeing her frustration at you, especially the slight heavy exhale through her nose very few would notice, helped you control the urge to shiver under Carol's touch.

"I hope you can do other things with that mouth of yours besides bitching, for your own sake." Carol said lowly before gripping the end of your shirt and pulling it over your head.

"It can work wonders," you winked at her with a grin, "and it's nice to know you care, Captain, not just a big, mean, dom I see."

Carol's hand wrapped tightly around your throat just as you finished your sentence. She glared at you with clear rage in her eyes, a look that made putting up your hard front difficult. You had a strong urge to apologise, but you instead pushed it aside.

"If you think for one moment I'm going to go ease on you at any point you are sadly mistaken, brat. I'm not done with you until you're a begging, quivering, pathetic mess that's forgotten her own name and only knows her Captain. Even then I won't take any pity because of the shit you keep pulling. Whores dont deserve sympathy." Your breathing was shaky as the words dripped from her mouth laced with poison, threatening to be the end of you.

You were made acutely aware of her grip of your neck tightening and her ability to cut it off and never let you breathe again. You weren't sure at what point you had given over all control, but you didn't want it to stop.

Carol leaned in next to your ear and her scent enveloped your sences again. Her voice had dropped considerably when she next spoke her whispered words. "I can't wait to break you." She bit down on your ear harshly making you yelp. You couldn't deny the effect she was having on your body, she could see it too. Of course she could, she was playing you like a fiddle and there was nothing you could do about it. It was a thrilling realisation.

Carol pulled away from you slowly while you tried to return your breathing to it's normal pace. It wasn't until you heard Carol's deep chuckled that you realised that your eyes were clenched shut. You opened them to see the blonde looking very proud of herself and the result she had gotten.

You couldn't make another witty remark. Your brain couldn't form any kind of coherent thought and you wouldn't have trusted your mouth to deliver it. Besides, after what Carol had just said, you were afraid to speak out of term again.

The self-certain hero reached around your back to unclasp your bra as her other hand came to rest on your stomach, pressing down as she used it for support while she leant forward.

Carol's eyes eagerly took in every inch of your skin the moment it was exposed. She slowly pulled your bra away before flinging it across the room without taking her eyes off of your breasts.

The cold air hitting your skin made your nipples strain in a want for attention, although you and Carol both knew that wasn't the only reason. Carol hummed at the sight and leaned forward again to rub your buds between her thumb and fingers. Your head leant back into the pillows at the attention, sighing in bliss before you hissed sharply at the the spark of pain.

The blonde smiled in amusement as she continued to pinch your nipples harshly, you didn't protests out of stubbornness.

Carol then picked up the forgotten clamps next to you, trailing the chain slowly and deliberately over your sensitive skin. She attached the left clamp with a silent concentration that filled the room with tension. You hissed again as Carol adjusted the screw to the level she saw fit, which was scarily tight, before moving to the next with the same accuracy.

You closed your eyes and tried not to enjoy the throbbing pain on you nipples, but the growing slick between your legs was telling enough.

You closed your eyes and bit your lip hard to suppress a whimper, failing when Carol gave the chain a quick tug that made you give a strained whimper that sounded more pathetic than it would have if you hadn't tried to stop it.

Carol moved further down your body and spread your legs apart so she could sit between them. You could feel the chain extending down your stomach so you opened your eyes in confusion and instantly squirmed.

The two clamps had separate chains that looped around a small ring that lay on your stomach, twinkling mischeviously in the light. There was a third chain on the bottom of the ring that had a clamp at the end of it. A clamp that Carol was guiding dangerously close to your still covered core.

You had had experience with clamps before, but the thought of one pinching painfully at your throbbing clit was one you were unfamiliar and uncertain with.

Carol adjusted herself according to your newfound protests to kneeling on your legs, each knee digging into each of your thighs as a show of control. Your hands were still free and just as you were about to sit up Carol spoke with a fake pout.

"Aww, do you not think you can handle this? Are you too sensitive?" She mocked making you freeze. "I can always stop if you want me to. All you have to do is say the magic word." The blonde continued to taunt.

Your pride screamed at you to make some snarky remark as to protect your ego, knowing saying 'please' would lead to you spiralling down the rabbit hole you refused to step foot in, while your fear begged you to stay quiet. But there was also a small part of you that was eager to experience the pleasurable pain the clamp would surely deliver to your clit.

So instead, you kept your mouth shut and stared up at the ceiling, trying to keep an eye on Carol in your peripheral while appearing to ignore her.

She smirked, unbeknownst to you, at your pettiness and trailed a single finger against the wet patch on your panties. You struggled to continue looking at the ceiling and bucked your hips to try and meet Carol's hand.

Surprisingly, Carol let you and even pressed further against your panties, rubbing your clothed lips and relishing in the effect she had on you.

Carol teased you like that for a while, rubbing her finger against your soaking folds before circling your throbbing clit. Every so often she received a quiet whine from you that flooded you with embarrassment, hating how your body betrayed you and pleased Carol.

Finally, Carol pulled your ruined panties down and gleamed at the sight of your glistening folds, the view making her pussy clench around nothing and ache more than it had all night. An idea sprung to mind and she smirked at the thought.

She took the third clamp between her long fingers and pinched at your clit. You yelped and bucked your hips up again as Carol entrapped the sensitive bundle of nerves.

"So responsive." She muttered, more to herself than you, as she slowly twisted the screw. Her eyes returned to your pained face as she adjusted the tightness, studying you to see when you would reach the peak of your pain and your limit.

Your face scrunched up at the sharp pain that jolted throughout your body and made you whine lowly as you turned your head to the side and tried to squirm away.

Carol took another glance at your strained bud, biting her lip at the sight, before gripping your under arms and flipped you onto your back.

You were surprised and caught off guard but all questions flew from your mind when you were pushed against the mattress, the clamps pressing down and amplifying your pain.

A tear formed in your eye as your nipples burned hot in pain and your clit ached against its restraint. You whined and tried to squirm away, the inch you did move only made things worse as your dragged the clamps and the skin they pinched across the mattress. You gave a small cry at the pain but pushed your face into the pillows to muffle it, still trying with everything you had to not let Carol win.

You were so caught up in the unnatural pain you didn't even notice Carol stripping herself of her jeans and pants. But you did notice when you felt her wet pussy lips come into contact with the back of your thigh.

You brain short circuited when you felt how wet she was and that she was slowly rocking herself on your leg, using your body to get herself off.

"What are you-"

"Quiet." Carol cut you off by demanding as her hands locked yours to the top of the mattress again.

Her arousal was spreading across your thigh as she grinded against you.

You could feel your own breathing increase rapidly as you heard Carol gasp out occasionally. You wanted to see her. You wanted to see the look of pleasure on her face as she approached her high. What did she look like cuming? Did you feel good against her? Would she ever let you make her cum with your fingers or tongue. You prayed desperetly that you would someday get the chance.

"Fuck." Carol moaned breathlessly. Your own pussy clenched around nothing at the sound and you knew that while Carol was getting her wetness over your thigh, you were getting your own on her bed.

Carol's grip on your hands tightened as her movements became more erratic, chasing her release.

"Your Captain's gonna cum on your thigh, brat. Such a good fuck toy for me to use." A moan slipped past your lips at her words. You cursed yourself for giving the reaction Carol wanted, helping her frantic movements.

"Oh you like this, slut? You like being my little fuck toy for me to use whenever I want?"

You desperetly searched for friction on the bed covers as you whined, only to accidently apply more overwhelming pressure to all 3 clamps.

Carol's cunt dug harder into the back of your thigh as she came with a low moan, coating your skin with the evident of her orgasm.

Surprisingly, Carol didn't move from your thigh as she brought a soft hand around to the soaking space between your legs. She tugged momentarily on the clamp there and you whimpered in protest making her snicker.

She fingers teased your lower lips as she spoke. "You seemed to enjoy that just as much as I did." Carol smirked arrogantly as her fingers swiped at your arousal. "Answer me." She demanded, delivering a smack to your ass to punctuate her words.

You didn't. Instead your breathed into the pillows and tried not to think about how they smelled like Carol in an annoyingly soft way.

Carol spanked you again harshly, barely giving you a chance to adjust to the last.

"No." You lied shakily.

"Don't lie to me. You're only adding to your punishment, not that I mind. It's just drawing out the fun I'm having. Being a lying little slut gives me something else to fuck out of you too." Carol spanked you again as those words left her lips. She gripped your hips tightly and pulled you up so your ass was on full display to her.

When Carol's hand returned to your ass her hand was considerably warmer. You thought it was strange at first until she did it again, this time burning hot.

You moaned into the pillow as your realised Carol was using her powers. And you loved it. The hellish heat, Carol's brute strength and the merciless ways she delivered the blows with no recovery time hit your core everytime.

Your legs shook in pleasure and pain and your moans got notably louder. Sometimes when you tried to lean back into Carol's hand she tugged sharply at the ring connecting the chains on your clamps and you immediately returned to your position.

"Something to say?" Carol inquired after a particularly loud moan from you.

It dawned on you how close you were to submitting yourself to Carol. How close you were to telling her you loved every second of what she was doing and wanted her to fuck you.

So, to convince yourself more than the dominant blonde above you, you spoke up. "Need your powers to help you, Carol? Can't do it on your own?"

The pissed off blonde spanked you unbelievably hard after that. Your whole body lurched forward so suddenly you almost hit your head on the wall. You ass was stinging terribly and you felt a tear trickle down your cheek just after you cried out.

Carol got off the bed to once again disappear into the closet, giving you a moment to wipe the stray tear away so she could never know it was there.

When the powerful hero returned your eyes immediately fell to the obnoxious toy between her legs.

You bit your lip at the thought of her fucking you with it. Despite that, you were in denial that something that long and girthy would even fit. Although you knew Carol would make it fit. And with the blonde as pissed as she was...

"God you're practically drooling on my sheets." Your cheeks redened slightly at her words. "You want my cock, brat? You wanna be your Captain's cockslut?" God you did. But you refused to admit it, even if there was a moan caught in your throat.

"It isn't for your needy little pussy yet. It's to shut you up." Carol said as she straddled your chest, the strap inches away from your face.

"I'm not sucking your fucking strap, Carol." You tried to defy passively with an amused grin. You wanted to, so much. The thought of doing something like that was making your cunt pulse. But you might as well get on your knees and beg for forgiveness. You refused to please Carol with such a submissive act, even if you could feel the cracks in your bratty walls grow with each exchange of words and acts.

To your surprise, Carol didn't push the idea any more, simply nodding with a sly smirk, as though she knew something you didn't.

Instead, the taller woman grabbed a small device from the side of the bed you had failed to notice prior. She twirled it in her hand, as though familiarizing herself with it as she positioned herself between your legs again, a place she seemed to be becoming familiar with.

As you gazed at the toy Carol held you couldn't help but feel there was something different about it. Something you couldn't quite placed. It wasn't as slim as any vibrator you had ever seen, not as pointed either, but there was something else to it too.

You didn't voice these inquires and the blonde didn't make any suggestive comments. So you let the thoughts go.

With her free hand, Carol unscrewed the clamp that had continued to grip onto you with everything it had. The release of pressure was unimaginably relieving but you didn't get long to appreciate it.

Carol wordlessly turned the vibrator on to a high setting and teased it against your skin just above your clit. Your hips jerked instantly in an attempt to lower the vibrator to where you needed it, but Carol placed a firm hand between your hip bones and kept you in place.

You almost whined at that, trying hard to keep it at bay, but Carol soon placed it directly onto your throbbing clit. Your hips bucked again as the vibrations hit you hard. The lack of a tip stopped them being focused to one point and instead pulsed down to every milimeter of your clit.

Despite this newfound pleasure, you couldn't shake the unnerving silence from Carol that hung in the room. Just as her lack of teasing with the vibrator hung over you. It seemed as though she was purely focused on drawing out your own pleasure, abandoning any precious plans. You knew that wasn't really the case. But you didn't know what was. It was anxiety inducing not knowing what Carol was planning in that stubborn head of hers.

The silent blonde watched you as she rotated the vibrator, grinding it into you like a drill that buzzed furiously. The vibrations were sending strong shock waves to your core that were carried throughout the entirety of your body in bliss.

Just as you were about to mentally praise yourself for not making a noise the vibrations seemed to multiple at an alarming rate.

You moaned the loudest you had all night at the feeling of warmth covering your core, emitting off of the vibrator that centred in on your aching clit that was drenched in arousal. Your hips tried to buck violently in search for the source of the vibrations that pulsed almost angrily.

You finally braved a look down as you panted heavily amongst moans to see what could possibly cause such uncharted pleasure only to spot the blue, yellow and red swirls of light you had come to hate the sight of. In that moment you didn't hate them though, far from it. You were entranced by the light show from Carol.

Your legs attempted to close around Carol's hand and the vibrator, but she held them apart. She watched you with an arrogant smirk as you threw your head back and moaned continuously, just as she had planned.

"Oh? I thought you didn't like me using my powers on you. You seem to be enjoying it now, judging by your slutty moans that is." She taunted knowingly.

You're unable to muster the voice to say something, to defend your ego. All you can do try to stop yourself moaning Carol's name or title.

Your breathing became increasingly ragged as Carol's powers never let up, mercilessly pulsing waves of vibrations to your core repeatedly until your legs started to shake.

Your cunt clenched around nothing as your clit throbbed aggressively, desperate to reach it's release it craved so much.

Your moans became less coherent when your back arched and toes curled. Just as you were about to fall over that glorious edge all vibrations died down to barely noticeable sensation.

You whined lowly at the worst teasing you had ever felt. It was as though Carol held you over your much needed edge by the back of your shirt, keeping you in that vulnerable state until she decided to either pull you back or let you go.

"Do you need something?" Carol asked with a shit eating grin.

You brought your hands down to push the vibrator further against you but Carol pinned them together in the middle of your stomach with one hand. The strength of just that was able to stop you and it was frustrating to no end knowing that.

Her other hand stayed firmly attached to the vibrator that was quietly buzzing against you core. Carol occasionally messed around with the vibrations levels and the inclusion of her powers to take you by surprise, constantly keeping you on the edge of where you needed to be most.

"Jesus Christ!" Your frustration bubbled to the surface, unable to control your anger at Carol for the merciless teasing she was making you ensure.

"Nope, just your Captain." If you had control of your legs, you would have kneed her in that stupidly attractive face of hers.

The vibrations were becoming too much yet still too little. Every so often they would spike to the previous level before returning to something unfairly light. Your orgasm seemed to grow closer and closer each time before it was denied.

Once, Carol slipped the powered vibrator through your drenched folds with her powers lining it. It felt insane. Energy tickling your inner walls as the vibrations hit all the right areas. But, of course, it was quickly pulled away too.

Just like that, all defiance left your body and you surrendered to your needs.

"Carol, Please, I need to cum so bad!" You wailed in desperation, not caring how you sounded.

"Really?" Carol wondered aloud as she stared down at you.

"Yes! Carol..." You whined and returned her stare pleadingly.

"Who are you begging to make you cum?"

You gulped stiffly, knowing you were about to slip head first into the rabbit hole you had been avoiding so precisely all night.

"You...My Captain." Carol preened at the use of her title, something she had long awaited to hear you say and was sure you would need no encouragement to say it countless more times that night.

"Good girl." She husked and carelessly threw the vibrator to the side now she could use something better. "You want your Captain to fuck you? You wanna cum on my cock like a good little slut?"

Your nodded eagerly, knowing the only way was forward and that you would do anything for what Carol wanted to do to you.

"Please Captain, I want you so bad." You begged shameless.

"Well then you need to get my cock ready for your cunt." Carol stated matter-of-factly as she sat up straight and edged towards you.

The silicone toy between her legs was getting nearer to your face and your mouth watered at the sight, knowing you would need it to help accomdate the size.

You were so dazed by the sight of the toy bigger than you had ever seen that Carol had to tap your cheek to prompt you to open your mouth for her strap.

You did so instantly and without hesitation, quickly having the tip of the silicone toy at your mouth.

"Such an obidient baby now. You would do anything for my cock wouldn't you?" But Carol didn't give you a chance to respond. She thrusted her hips forward and in a flash she was forcing the strap into your mouth and hitting the back of your throat.

The blonde retreated the strap slightly only to ram it back in with more force and causing you to gag as it surpassed your limit without consideration.

You tried to sit up on your elbows to try and soften Carol's thrusts but she knelt down painfully on your arms as she gripped the headboard to aid her thrusting.

"I haven't even got you tired up and you're still so helpless." She mocked cruelly as she continued to make you gag and choke on the toy you struggled to accomdate so badly.

Eventually it became too much and you body fell limp in defeat, drool spilling from your mouth.

Carol didn't fail to notice this and chuckled darkly at the sight of you spread out on her bed with a dazed expression. She hadn't even fucked you yet.

As the dominant hero withdrew her strap she felt a rush to her core at the sight of your saliva glistening on her cock. You really had gotten it ready for yourself. Not that it would help you handle the size much.

Carol didn't waste and time lining the strap up with your entrance. Her hands were firmly placed on either of your thighs to ensure you stay spread open for her.

"Please." You whispered as you both watched the strap part your folds, paving a way for itself, before disappearing into your hungry pussy. You moaned loudly as the strap stretched your walls for it's entrance. You couldn't help but cling onto Carol's bare back and scratch the prominent muscle beneath your fingers as she sunk the strap in further.

The pain was present but it was overridden by the amazing pleasure provided by it. Your pussy clenched desperately around the intruder just before Carol bottomed out into you and you cried out at the unexpected motion, gripping onto the woman above you as much as you could.

She pulled the strap out slightly, only to slam it back in with force that made your whole body jerk and shudder. She pulled out more the next time, as though giving you a moment to prepare before thrusting the toy back into your still unprepared cunt.

You moaned over and over, struggling to form words and accomdate the brutal strap. You were overwhelmed with pleasure and pain as they took over every part of your brain, body and soul.

Her pace never faulted, never giving you a break. Every thrust was just as hard as the last, leaving you a moaning and shuddering mess beneath her.

"You feel how deep I am inside you, slut?" Carol grunted as she continued her onslaught of fucking tour dripping pussy.

"Yes Captain! Feels so good. You feel so good deep inside me." You moaned between breathless pants.

"God you're such a desperate slut for me. Dripping whore for me to use whenever I want." She punctuated each word with the snap of her hips.

The coil in your lower abdomen was starting to tighten and you craved your release.

"C-Captain." You stuttered as you started to shudder. "I'm gonna...cum."

"Beg me for it." Carol demanded and you complied without question.

"Please! Please Captain, I'm gonna cum so hard! Please let me! I'll be good for you." You begged as though Carol held your life in her hands.

"Why should I let you?"

"Because I- because I'm sorry!" You looked Carol in the eyes as you pleaded, letting you see her expression when she knew she had won. You both knew.

"How sorry?" Carol asked as her pace increased. You knew you wouldn't be able to hold off your orgasm for much longer.

"I'm so sorry. It'll never happen again. I promise." Carol watched you for a moment as she memorized every inch of you during her victory.

"Cum for your Captain." With a cry, you came incredibly hard on Carol's cock. Your whole body shuddered violently as Carol fucked you through your orgasm in the most ungentle way possible.

"I'm cuming! I'm cuming on your cock, Captain!" Never in your life did you think you would talk like this to someone, especially not Carol. Never since meeting the arrogant hero did you think you would submit to her in such a wanton way.

Carol fucked you through your orgasm and into another one without even considering giving you a break or chance to recover from the earth shattering one you had just experienced. Your vision was still spotted with blanks as you tried to speak this to her but you couldn't manage to form any coherent words, the only sounds resonating throughout the room were your desperate moans, slapping of Carol's thighs against your own and the wet sound of your pussy being fucked, this being amplified even more now that your cum was swirling around inside of you with the strap.

Carol unexpectedly reached out quicker than you could react to and locked her hand around your throat. Her pace was harder this time, as though reminding you she hadn't forgotten she was punishing you and that she was still mad at you. Clearly very mad.

The strap slammed against the back of your pussy and had you crying out in a failed attempt to adjust to it. Even that was muffled by Carol's grip on your airways.

You couldn't believe the force she was able to gather to drive herself into you with each thrust. Over and over. You began to loose your grip on the world around you.

You plummeted into another orgasm in no time, your overworked pussy spasming around the strap as it released more sticky liquid onto it that you were too blissed out to notice was dripping onto yours and Carol's thighs. She smacked your thigh hard to show she at least had acknowledged it.

You lost count of how many times you had cum. When your limbs went weak and finally dropped from Carol's back she withdrew. Something you were thankful for until she flipped you onto your front and dove back in. Her stamina and sex drive was unforgivable and unmatched. And soon, it was the only thing you knew.

You continued to moan and scream profanities into the pillow while Carol wrecked your world above you. She had your head forced into the pillows with one hand and showed no signs of letting up.

You mustered as much energy as you could to squirm away but your efforts were futile. Your pussy ached with the punishing pace and extreme overstimulation you were experiencing. But you had no way to escape it. All you could do was lay beneath your Captain, voice horse from screaming so loud countless times, and take everything she was giving.

When the final orgasm was ripped from your body it was as though it had taken every part of you with it. Your exhausted and overworked body finally abandoned you and left you to be enveloped by the darkness and the strong arms of Carol Danvers.

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