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kasienda · 4 months

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Fanfiction Year in Review 2023

I fill this out every year. It’s become a bit of a tradition for me. Allows me to reflect on everything that I’ve written and kinda think about where I want to go next. And I like it better from the ask games because I don’t have to wait for asks to come in and can compare my answers from one year to the next. ^_^

1 List of fics completed this year in the order they were finished:

Displaced (Ladrien oneshot)

No Regrets (Ladynoir oneshot - smut)

You Don’t Have To Pretend With Me (Platonic Adrino oneshot)

Representation Reveal (S5 Adrinette oneshot)

Kisses in the Rain (S5 AU Love Square - technically multichapter, but it’s shorter than many of my one-shots)

Would Trust You With Everything (Adrino multichapter)

Just An Ordinary Girl (Marichat oneshot)

Love Remains (Ladynoir multichapter)

Spin the Bottle (OT4 with cour four - technically oneshot, but it’s longer than Kisses and has more kisses in it. Haha!)

2 Number of words written:

Written: 166,114 words

Published: 151,018 words (more than twice 2022’s number!! Go me!!)

Those numbers are incredibly close together because I haven’t been redrafting as much. Those numbers include six one shots, three completed multi chapters. And another four multi chapter WIPs saw at least one update.

And in another fun milestone! I broke a million words published on Ao3 just this last week!! (I've been writing fic since 2003 and everything I've ever written is on Ao3!)

3 Your most popular fic:

Not Part of the Plan - I suspect that this is mostly because being a teen pregnancy fic, it’s my most tropiest story this year. Haha!

4 Your personal fav:

Aftermath - This story has usurped Right Behind You as my favorite. I’ve been able to connect to the raw hurt and grief in this story, and there’s something very raw and human about it that others seem to be able to connect to as well. I think it’s some of my best work, and that is also thanks to an amazing beta in @ladyofthenoodle who has lent her expertise in more than one way in making this one more true to lived experience.

5 Your fav scene:

It’s so hard to pick a favorite!! I narrowed it down to my three favorites in no particular order.

The last scene in Ch 5 Love Remains - Chat Noir give amnesiac Ladybug a geography lesson from space. It’s got Whole New World vibes, and I just loved the imagery of it.

Ch 4 of Aftermath - I’m particularly proud of Marinette’s panic attack when Adrien tells her she doesn’t have to keep coming over. Like it feels like it comes out of nowhere, but it just totally makes sense. And how it manifests and how she soothes herself (it’s not healthy, but it’s so GOOD!)

Ch 7 of Would Trust You With Everything - The scene where Chat Noir tries to tell Nino who he is, but inevitably doesn’t. And how Nino reassures him through all that. This scene feels so raw, but so heartwarming in light of Adrien’s fears. And I don’t know - it’s beautiful to me.

6 A fic or scene that challenged you:

I really struggled with Right Behind You this year, though it wasn’t for lack of trying! I had started out the year hoping to go back to an update a month here and I only updated it three times throughout 2023.

This was incredibly frustrating because the initial drafts of scenes would come pretty easily, but I couldn’t seem to make them pop the way the earlier chapters did. The good news is I think I figured out what the issue was. Most of my writing this year has been speed writing. And a big part of that is just where I’ve been emotionally. I’m very very out of practice in editing and redrafting, which this story and Aftermath both definitely need.

I’ve only been able to edit Aftermath because I’ve had a ton of help. (Thanks Noodles!) Sadly, it’s harder to find betas for rarepairs, but I have succeeded! (Thanks@coffeebanana!)

7 A line of writing you’re proud of:

“She wanted to be there to see it. To see him.”

This line is way better in context, but I’ve made myself cry about three times with it. And I refuse to explain it because that would give its power away. Guess you’ll just have to go read Aftermath.

8 A comment that touched you:

I can never answer this question without mentioning several!!

Would Trust You With Everything - this story had a ton of enthusiastic followers - way more than rarepair work usually gets, and I wrote this story right after my life fell apart and all the commenters here made throwing this story together just that much more joyful during a time when I REALLY needed it. (I'm looking at you, @bittersweetresilience, @bbutterflies @flightfoot @coffeebanana and so many others that I don't know your tumblr name!!!) Not Part of the Plan Comments - I added sex ed lessons to the end of each chapter here because there’s so much about fertility and pregnancy that people don’t know if typical pregnancy fics are anything to go by, and this seemed to inspire so many people to share their pregnancy stories!!! And these have been so cool because I’ve learned that these stories just don’t often have an opportunity to be shared. And it’s neat that this story with its accompanying lessons could create a space for that!! Aftermath comments - lots of people who have really struggled with moderate to severe depression have apparently felt very seen by this fic. And that a story that is essentially about two characters who feel very alone and like no one can understand can help people feel LESS alone and MORE understood is simply amazing!! I love this story so much!! AHH!! Here's one from @neurovascular-entrapta that meant a lot to me.

9 Something that inspired your writing:

Grief and the need to feel things in a distant abstract-these-are-story-book-characters kind of way so I don’t have to feel my actual feelings as closely every moment of the day really kept me writing the whole year long.

10 Your proudest accomplishment (that one scene; finally finishing that one fic; posting your first fic; etc):

My writing has been really raw and messy this year, and I can’t keep tenses straight to save my life. But there’s something powerful about the rawness that I really like even as all the grammatical errors and the lack of effort on the technical side of most of my stories has driven me nuts.

I am proud of myself for being able to get back into the big projects in these last few months after not being able to face them from April to October. And I’ve started participating in a few writing events here and there again in addition to working on my own pet projects.

11 Do you have any writing goals for the next year?

Well, I wanted to finish Not Part of the Plan in 2023, which didn’t happen only barely! So hoping the last chapter and the epilogue make it out within the next month. Once that’s done I think I want to try and make Aftermath and Right Behind You my primary focus projects this year. And of course, I’m sure new plot bunnies and writing events will take over my brain on occasion. Last year, I said I wanted my writing to become a reliable mental health tool for me again, and I’m glad to say that it definitely was that for 2023. I hope I’m able to use my writing this year to continue my healing journey.

And maybe go and proofread all of the fics I finished in 2023 to fix all the inconsistent tense issues to prepare them for being bound eventually!

12 Anyone you would like to thank?

SO MANY PEOPLE!

@jennagrinsoverml for being one of my oldest fandom friends! For becoming a real life friend for all that we haven't actually met in person. For all the times you vented to me and listened and sent me pictures of your family and gushed over pictures of mine. I'm lucky to know you!

@ladyofthenoodle - for showing up in my DMs, For being a most insightful beta, for dragging me into a larger community over and over again, for listening to both my real struggles and my first world problems, for being my friend!!

@thelibraryloser - I don't know how to put this into words. But I very much look up to you. For your resilience through difficult times - you are role-model for how to handle this world with grace and kindness. Thank you for your stories!

@coffeebanana - for being so enthusiastic in the creation process before and after! When I have a story that is getting no attention one comment from you makes it so it doesn't matter. You give me all I need.

@bittersweetresilience and @wackus-bonkus-maximus for just being so kind and enthusiastic and supportive of any idea I happen to be talking about in any given moment. I guess for enabling me. Haha!

@blur0se and @mila-beedoodling for sharing your ideas and inspiring me to create new things!!

@asukiess, @chocoluckchipz, @sariahsue, @miabrown007 for creating so many beautiful things and for being kind and engaging in so many conversations!

And now, I'm really nervous that I'm forgetting someone because this is the first time where I feel like I've had more than three fandom friends. Haha! It's a good problem to have I suppose. In general, thank you to the miraculous community for helping me to survive this year. <3 <3 <3

Happy New Year Everyone!!

I invite anyone who wants to, to fill this out! (Or something similar because I think it can be modified for artwork pretty easily). But if you do, please tag me, so I can be a cheerleader for all you've accomplished this year!

#year in review #life of a writer #all the fanfiction I wrote this year #2023 #my reflections

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the-joy-of-knowledge · 2 years

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The Joy of Knowledge

A guide to the Joy of knowledge

Books

You are standing on your acres of diamond

How to stop worrying and start winning

The 80/20 Principle

Psychology

Halo effect

Maslow's Hierarchy

Ideal Self vs. Actual Self

Self development

Writing therapy

20s: the defining decade

Being a late bloomer

What is passion?

Ted talks for the soul

A guide to being an all rounder

Power of positive self talk

Lessons from failure

In your 20s

Productivity

Using an alarm system as a productivity tool

Reading

10 Books that will make you smarter

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the---hermit · 6 months

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12|11|2023

The last day of my week of rest and I cannot believe a whole week is gone. Looking back I probably needed a bit more than a week to get my energies back, but I'll make sure to go easy on myself next week. Today was made of reading and resting and it was the best way to end the week for me. Tomorrow my new class awaits me and I am feeling a mixture of dread and excitement. I am not looking forward to the commute but maybe the new topics and a new weekly routine will give me motivation.

Today's self care:

Read first thing in the morning

Had a videocall with my best friend which was really nice and made me feel good we should try to schedule these calls more often

Cuddled up in my reading chair with a new book and lots of tea

📖: Finn Family Moomintroll by Tove Jansson (I am still slowly reading this book, I am savouring it when I need to immerse myself in something calming and cozy), The Odyssey by Homer (I finally decided to pick this up, I have studied it in multiple occasions but I never read it cover to cover and the edition I got a few months back is incredible, I am in fact also eyeing their edition of the Iliad which might be in my priority wishlist now)

#cozy hobbit autumn #no list but it's still the branding of the season #I am slowly getting back in the mood for my daily posts #it's good for me to write down a couple of thoughts and reflect on my days but my no energy levels have made me feel like #that was too overwhelming to do #i also have a few book reviews to write and post but that is a future me problem #studyblr #studyinspo #bookblr #book #journal #journaling #knife gang #uniblr #university #self care #studying #mine #the---hermit

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glorious-sunset · 2 months

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Reflections on Ep. 3 of LBFAD on rewatch

Liufang Pavillion: It’s hilarious that Dieyi has been searching for the Xilan Goddess for 10,000 years, abducting countless plant spirits over that time, and the moment the Goddess actually appears right under her nose, she is about to toss her life away without a second thought! :D Luckily, a miniature sun made of DongFang QingCang’s (DFQC) powers uneclipses through a portal in the sky and he saves her (and himself!) just as she is about to be thrown into a cauldron full of evil qi, only in the nick of time. Phew, that was close!

DFQC’s bored look that he assumes every time he deals with enemies is delicious. DFQC sees Xiao Lanhua (XLH) as an object to be protected and hides her in his fist (what a contrast to the ep. 9 rescue where DFQC sees her as a person, as one of his people who is loyal to him and he is reciprocally loyal to her). XLH is therefore aware that he saved her, but does not see the devastation at his hand as his sun shoots killer rays at the Pavillion soldiers and sends shockwaves that shake the distant mountains around them. Dieyi is (rightfully) terrified. DFQC, sensing the evil qi from the cauldron and the fact that it and these people are a threat to XLH and therefore to himself, splits the cauldron in half (ha! He should have pulverised it, as he has to return in ep. 15 to do this and finish the job after Ronghao repairs it :D )

When everyone has either fled in terror or been disintegrated, DFQC examines XLH angrily. How could such a weak and pathetic creature, who can’t even protect herself, have cursed him, the most powerful being in the three realms?! No wonder he would “very very very very much like to kill” her. The fact that he can’t is tremendously frustrating and he is boiling inside. His menacing possessiveness being completely misinterpreted by XLH as affection is not only a hilarious ongoing gag, it is the only way these two could have managed to get emotionally close! :D

XLH still thinks that DFQC is an ordinary celestial criminal, because who else could he be? She heard from the other fairies in ep. 2 that celestial criminals had escaped but been captured by Changheng (CH). She’s not yet aware that members of the Moon Tribe were also incarcerated in Haotian Tower. The High Council told all the celestials that DFQC is deceased, so his real identity is the last person she would suspect him of being.

When DFQC asks her to break the curse, XLH recognises the Xilan seal due to her love of reading (an interest they share), especially of history books. She claims she couldn’t have cast this kind of spell on him as she is just a weak little orchid, so he investigates her story by examining her original form. He sees her orchid form with corroded roots, the disguise her parents bestowed upon her. Note however, that after visiting the Great Turtle in ep. 9, her form looks much more ambiguous when Sansheng examines it. DFQC lets her go, believing he doesn’t need her help. In her haste to leave, she drops the Universe Pill, which he picks up. He tries to remove the Xilan curse himself but finds, almost unprecedentedly, that this is a magic too powerful for him to neutralise.

Oblivion River: DFQC and Shangque (SQ) now know that XLH is a surviving member of the Xilan tribe but not that she is the Goddess. In fact, SQ tells DFQC in this scene that the whole tribe including the Shennu (Goddess) were wiped out 30,000 years ago. DFQC doesn’t realise she is the Goddess until ep. 26.

The implications of the curse get worse! Not only does DFQC share XLH’s physical vulnerability, he has to share her emotions as well! (oh boy, wait until he finds out about having to obey her every command! :D )

Arbiter Hall, Day 1: This is the start of the ten-or-more day period at Arbiter Hall which for DFQC, although he complains bitterly most of the time, are in retrospect the happiest and most precious days of his life. Having passed through Shuiyuntian’s Spirit Lock gate concealed by his powerful invisibility cloak, he appears at Arbiter Hall, much to XLH’s exasperation. Doesn’t she wonder where he gets these fabulous outfits from, or why an escaped criminal is so well-dressed and wears a crown? :D

XLH puts her hands on his waist and tries to stop him from entering Arbiter Hall. He pauses. Nobody else would even dare enter his close proximity, let alone touch him! Now this weak and cute little fairy keeps touching him rather intimately with her soft, warm hands and he’s not sure what to do about it. Why isn’t she afraid of him like everyone else is? Even his dominating moves, pulling her body against his and her face within an inch of his own only work momentarily. She briefly glances at his lips then decides she is not interested. “Let go of me” she says calmly. As she pushes him away, she drops the destiny leaf and DFQC summons it into his hand.

Since her efforts to snatch it back are annoying, he teleports her away with a snap of his fingers. We’ve now seen him easily teleport both himself and her, and his ability to create impenetrable invisibility cloaks around himself (and her in ep. 5). This brings me to a side note. How interesting it is that he chose not to use these abilities during a certain underwater scene in ep. 8 to teleport themselves out of the water and conceal themselves, nor to recreate a large air bubble around themselves similar to what XLH conjured when they first hit the water. Very tellingly, he instead chose to provide her with air through much more intimate means, which she was then forced to go along with for many minutes as CH and his troops searched Arbiter Hall! (fortunately for him, she also enjoyed it and is seen skipping happily through the forest afterwards) ;D

Back to the destiny leaf. What a turn of good luck! Lady Chidi’s spirit is not burned and dispersed as he thought. He recognises the destiny leaf as belonging to a mortal reincarnation of Lady Chidi through her Hellfire mark. The leaf is the key to obtaining her spirit, freeing his 100,000 loyal soldiers and reviving Cangyan Sea! Unfortunately, XLH returns and uses her powers to grapple with him over the destiny leaf. He tries to be gentle to avoid damaging the leaf but is unsuccessful. The destiny leaf was fine until they damaged it with their bickering!

Fountain Palace: CH ordered his subordinates to search the whole realm for escaped criminals – ah! But they overlooked the most important place, the home of his love! What a great excuse to see her – he decides to go there personally.

Arbiter Hall: DFQC is careful to avoid physically harming XLH while still trying to threaten her enough to get information about Lady Chidi’s destiny leaf. This is new territory for DFQC. He threatens to burn her greenhouse (and her plant spirit friends) to motivate her to obey him, but will soon discover why this is a bad idea since he shares her emotions.

While he holds her hostage, CH arrives and does not pick up on any of Creeper’s hints! Poor Creeper! She is terrified of DFQC and that he will kill XLH if she slips up (not knowing that he can’t), but still wants CH to protect XLH and the plant spirits. “The Arbiter Hall is very safe. Nobody came to steal a destiny book nor burn the greenhouse. My lord, please look for XLH” :D Why is CH so dense? Having learned that XLH is preparing for the fairies’ examination, he still keeps his distance, not taking up Creeper’s suggestion to give her guidance in person, and instead runs off to make an Immortal Pill to help her with the exam!

XLH cries. DFQC is overwhelmed by her feelings of sadness projected onto him! He realises that if he continues to upset her he will also suffer, so changes tactics to offer her the Universe Pill that she lost if she repairs the destiny leaf. XLH tries to fix the destiny leaf but is too exhausted. This leads to discussions about sleeping arrangements. “Where do you want to spend the night with benzuo?” She is still in danger from the people of Liufang Pavilion and he needs to protect her. XLH is understandably concerned at the thought of sharing a bed with a handsome stranger. DFQC's blank expression when he asks what would happen if they share a bed is priceless! This is the first of many times he looks adorably confused as he considers her words – he is very attentive (and soon, also respectful) of everything she says!

However, he still views her as an object (his one vulnerability) to be protected, so she finds he has teleported himself onto her bed (with his shoes on! The indignity!) He left a liiiittle bit of space on his left side for her and fully expects her to lie there beside him :D He is so clueless! If those two actually shared a bed at this stage in the name of protecting XLH, I’m certain she would be the only one tempted to cross a line (though he might respond). But our heroine insists on being treated as a person with her own thoughts and values, and generally wins every argument that they have. Her charming smile softens his resolve and he respectfully goes back to his own room.

Despite him being so annoying, XLH has already started to care for him, and in her dream, is terrified that he will be captured and killed!

Bonus artwork from the supremely talented clj-art-blog (use tag #clj-art-blog to view all of her fabulous artwork!). If DFQC had been a little more persistent and XLH a little less stubborn. Sharing a bed with her dark protector in Episode 3, posted with permission.

Here is a link to my episode 4 review (contains spoilers). All of my LBFAD articles and episode reviews can be viewed with the tag #lbfad reflections (hyperlinked) and the table of contents to these is here.

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nataliescatorccio · 4 months

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A YEAR IN REVIEW: 2023 CREATIONS

Post your favorite and most popular post from each month this year (it’s okay to skip months).

Tagged by @katherines, @laylakeating, @crowley-anthony, @capinejghafa & @mangeur-detoiles thank you all for tagging me, this is one of my favourite end-of-year tag games as it's so nice to be able to reflect on everything for the year!

Also yes, I will be cheating because I am indecisive, so I'm doing more of a 'top 3' than one favorite.

JANUARY MOST POPULAR: technically: polls shitpost edit (7.1k) but gifset wise: wednesday + gay text posts (2.7k) FAVORITE(S): celebration: morgana pendragon, celebration: stranger things, celebration: kanthony

FEBRUARY MOST POPULAR: sure joel (5.2k) FAVORITE(S): bill and frank, celebration: yennefer, celebration: isabelle lightwood

MARCH MOST POPULAR: kanej and their armour (11.7k) FAVORITE(S): celebration: ronance, celebration: wednesday, ellie & riley

APRIL MOST POPULAR: jesper and inej deleted scene (3.8k )FAVORITE(S): select a crow, kanej: favorite quotes, kanej: favorite object

MAY MOST POPULAR: sideblog: danielle & calahan (3.3k) main: yellowjackets pilot vs s2 finale (2.8k) FAVORITE(S): crows as crows, yellowjackets: then and now, yellowjackets: the wilderness chose

JUNE MOST POPULAR: ciri and jaskier watch yenralt (4.7k) FAVORITE(S): yennefer the enchantress, the witcher: volume i, yennefer in 'turn your back'

JULY MOST POPULAR: jaskier and ciri's cut scene (4.1k) FAVORITE(S): celebration: yenralt, jackie and shauna, damon and rhaneyra parallels

AUGUST MOST POPULAR: red white and loyal blue letterboxd reviews (10.8k) FAVORITE(S): heartstopper representation, celebration: yennefer, an angel and a demon

SEPTEMBER MOST POPULAR: sideblog: barbie as barbies (2.5k) main: geraskefer incorrect quote (2.2k) FAVORITE(S): choose a yellowjacket, natalie scatorccio, yennefer in shaerrawedd

OCTOBER MOST POPULAR: ed and stede: dream become reality (6.9k) FAVORITE(S): celebration: bridgerton, yennefer in reunion, ed and stede: i love

NOVEMBER MOST POPULAR: sideblog: lucy gray baird (1k) main: jaskier incorrect quote (0.7k) FAVORITE(S): celebration: ed and stede, celebration: yennefer and tissaia, edward 'babygirl' teach

DECEMBER MOST POPULAR: persassy jackson (12.7k) FAVORITE(S): netflix's six of crows, celebration: kanej, favorite crows scene

tagging (if you feel up for it!): @ughmerlin, @usershelby, @ivashkovadrian, @zoya-nazyalenskys, @seance, @natscatorrcio @fadeintoyou1993, @ayoedebiris, @saws2004, @morgana-pendragon

#tag game #2023 in review #i love doing this it makes me feel so much better as a creator #cos i'm always very negative about my work...#but doing this makes me go oh i did actually make things this year and they weren't that bad!#so nice to reflect

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randomgirl005 · 4 months

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~ The midnight library ~

So, “THE MIDNIGHT LIBRARY” by Matt Haig, has the power to transform the way you perceive your own life, teaching you to appreciate your present, your loved ones, and most importantly, yourself.

I read some reviews that said It wasn't a book for young people (young adults/teenagers), and that they are not ready to read such a reflection of life. Well, I must say that, from my thinking, this book can help anyone, because in the end, our life is based on the choices we make, but also the regrets of not having chosen a different path, and that is not some adults thing, it's a human thing.

It kind of makes you understand that being critical of who you are and what you aspire to become is unnecessary, even if you don't have your whole life figured out yet.

Please read it, and think about your life, your choices, and your regrets. After reading it, take some time to think; Would you have done anything different? If you still think you should, let Nora Seed's journey inspire you to make a positive difference.

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benevolenterrancy · 4 months

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My art summary for this year! One standout piece for each month... so it was a little maddening when I had one month with a bunch of good pieces and then a few months (october...) where I did almost nothing

And a tally of the fandoms I drew for:

Hogan's Heroes, somehow, is still in the lead of my most prolific fandom! Given how deep I've been into the MXTX novels lately I thought it would have been overthrown, but nope, Hogan's Heroes still wins first in my heart this year apparently!

The other fandoms I drew at least a couple pieces of art for this year were Torchwood, MDZS, TGCF, MASH, Doctor Who, Rat Patrol, Sherlock Holmes, Cybersix, Les Mis, bandes desinées as a collective unit, A Marvellous Light, and Xena. The numbers for people who are interested

and fandoms I only drew a single piece or doodled for were: Banjo-Kazooie, Between the Lions, Detective Conan, Dr Domino, Dimwood Forest, Dragon Age, Firekeeper, Good Omens, Helluva Boss, Hitchhiker's Guide, Leisure Suit Larry, Lupin III, Miss Fisher, Ninjago, One Piece, Once Upon A Time, Penumbra, Pippi Longstocking, Planet of the Apes, Pretty Woman, RWBY, Spy x Family, Transformers, and When the Angels Left The Old Country!

...I do nothing if not dabble, apparently. That dashboard osmosis game certainly gave me a chance to draw for a lot of interesting things

#my art #tumblr2023 #year in review #hogan's heroes #it really is the fandom i end up circling back to in the end when i need something chill and comforting #also it hands down has the best fandom so its siren song always lures me back in <333 i've met great people thanks to hogan's heroes #mdzs #tgcf #cybersix #torchwood #mash #i grouped my bd art together because i've dabbled in a bunch of different ones but not really enough to stand on their own #some tintin some asterix some blacksad... a few others #okay and with this i'm done reflecting on last years art and you will be getting new fresh art next time i post u.u #i feel like i haven't been doing much art lately i've been on too much of a writing kick lately so hopefully yall have been enjoying my #fanfiction posting #bene speaks

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frodothefair · 5 months

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Fragrance's year in review

Since I just finished my last workday of the year, even though it's not yet Christmas or New Year, I feel like there's a certain finality to today, more so than there might be on either one of those holidays.

And let me tell you, it's been a year, but I can honestly say that today I feel a great deal better, and like a very different person, than I did a year ago.

It was about a year ago, in early January, that shit hit the fan with my health.

But before that, if we rewind back to last December, I was absolutely miserable in my job, and in my life. I felt helpless to help anyone. I had some serious ethical qualms about the field I am in. Every day, going into work felt like a death march. I had little to look forward to besides the next thing the Netflix algorithm was going to show me. I was rewatching the Harry Potter series, which I had never particularly liked, but it was an escape.

Then, in January I took a medication that I had a bad reaction to, but getting off of it, I started to feel really bad in a different way. January through March were, bar none, the worst time in my life, and that's saying a lot. I am still trying to get off the darn thing, one literal drop at a time, and while I still have some bad days on the whole I am a great deal closer to my "normal" self than I had been in months.

And as a result of the above experiences, a number of things changed, and for the better.

I got back into Lord of the Rings, and the parallels to Frodo and the other characters' struggles have given me validation and meaning. I connected with the books and the movies in a way I had never done before.

I joined the tumblr LOTR community and met some wonderful people.

I started writing again, and my efforts to rewrite Frodo's story have paralleled my own attempts at healing.

I now have something I legitimately look forward to every day, and it feels invigorating to be a creator as well as an appreciator of other people's work.

I became better at dealing with the everyday. I've realized that many ordinary things, things that I already do, can be incredibly healing if they are done with intention. When I feel bad, I now look forward to getting better, because I know this too shall pass. If I feel good, I savor it and remain grateful. I have never before been good at being grateful, and I am still learning.

And at my job, while it's still heavy at times, I try to look at things more simply now. It may not be a perfect system, and the tools I have may be flawed, but at least I have a skillset and G-d willing, I may be able to help somebody, somewhere now and then.

#lotr #year in review #healing #mental health #self reflection

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everchased · 5 months

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23 and 31 for spotify wrapped

guess who turned 30 (and was normal about it) and figured out they were poly (and was NOT normal about it) this year babyyyyy!!!

#ask #LMAOOOO JACK'S WHOLE SELF-REFLECTING YEAR IN REVIEW #honeyginger #spotify wrapped

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ifwebefriends · 4 months

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A Reflection of Starlight Review

(TW: brief mentions of COVID, cancer, and suicide) (spoilers for Les Mis but no spoilers for AROS)

Please indulge me as I tell a bit of a personal story.

I took French all throughout high school and also participated in French club. I was also really into musical theatre (and I still am) so I was interested in the musical Les Misérables. I saw it live once and it was incredible. Sometime during my sophomore year I tried to read the original Brick but didn’t get very far, it’s just kinda not my thing I guess. But the characters were so charming and endearing to me and I was primarily moved by the stories of Jean Valjean and Inspector Javert. I was moved by how their characters and stories mirror each other and how they’re so alike but their differences drove them to very different places. During my senior year of high school we watched the 2012 Les Mis film in French club one day. At the end when Javert kills himself, almost everyone in the room cheered, but I did not. While Javert did many bad things, had a very narrow worldview, and made things so much harder for our protagonist, I still felt pity for him. I felt pity that he lived by this one doctrine all his life because he kind of had no other choice and when faced with the idea that he may be wrong, he was so distressed and had no one to turn to, so he took his own life.

Earlier that year, I started reading a fanfiction called A Reflection of Starlight by AutumnGracy, and I was quickly sucked in. For those unaware, it is a continuation of the Les Mis book that starts with one big difference: Jean Valjean saves Javert from drowning after he throws himself into the Seine. From there, the two grow closer and Javert learns to live with the fact that the law isn’t infallible with the help of Jean Valjean.

I started reading this fanfic in the spring of 2019 and I didn’t finish it until today, January 15th, 2024. Over four years. To my credit, it is a HUGE work, spanning over 379,000 words; that’s longer than the entire Hunger Games trilogy, which is about 301,000 words in total. A lot has happened in my life since I started reading that slowed my progress. The COVID pandemic hit, I got diagnosed with cancer, beat cancer, started college, had a cancer relapse, beat the cancer relapse, and got a boyfriend all in the time that it took me to finish this thing. This is the longest text that I have ever read.

And there’s a good reason why I stuck with it: it’s absolutely amazing. While I didn’t read the original Brick, the wording and structure of the story seems very appropriate for the original time period and story. It’s extremely well-written and tells a compelling story all on its own that gives all of the main characters a resolution to their pasts and a hopeful and happy ending. It’s kinda plot-heavy, there’s a lot of original stories and plot lines taking place, but it is all engaging and wraps up really nicely.

The center-point of the story, however, is the growing relationship and eventual romance between Jean Valjean and Javert. From beginning to end you see how this beautiful relationship slowly develops and grows. And I mean SLOW. This is literally the slowest burn that I have ever read. But it’s worth it. Even before it’s explicitly romantic, there are lots of cute, endearing moments between the two that kept me hooked. They’re even asexual which makes my aspec heart so happy. This is probably the greatest fanfiction that I’ve ever read.

@autumngracy thank you so much for such a wonderful work. Your authors notes throughout were entertaining and made me feel like I was experiencing this story along with you. Your writing is phenomenal and I hope you know how great your skills are.

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