#minor illness and angst
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A Safe Place (part 4/4) [day 24]
Cliff’s past experiences in hospitals have all been bad. For @monthofsick day 24: Panic and @badthingshappenbingo Paralyzed by Fear. 3,698 words, original work, TWs emeto (mild x1), hospital/surgical content, child abuse/trauma. If you'd like to skip the first half which is a childhood flashback, control-find the word “eighteen”.
Part 1 | Part 2 | Part 3 - This is the final part! Thanks for sticking with me guys.
Cliff’s fear of hospitals first began when he was three years old. He’d been inside the hospital several times because his dad worked there, but he hadn’t really processed it as anything significant until one day when he went there with his mother, who’d been tasked with watching him because the nanny was off. Cliff had been doing everything “wrong” that day, and Hana Barrows had reached her limit after a spilled glass of orange juice. She dragged him by the wrist to the car and drove to the hospital, swearing loudly all the way there. Cliff was silent because even back then he knew that saying anything would just make things worse.
Hana brought Cliff up to Dr. Claude Barrows’ office without warning, ignoring the secretary shouting after her as she passed without signing in. She yanked Claude’s door open without knocking and found him hunched over a pile of paperwork.
“What in the - Hana! What on earth are you doing here?! Why is Cliff here?”
“I’m not a babysitter!” She shouted as she shoved Cliff towards his father, who would have fallen on his face had Claude not caught him. “You promised me I’d never have to babysit!”
“Keep your voice down,” Claude hissed. He sat Cliff on the chair he’d been sitting on and turned to his irate wife. “It’s one day in his entire life Hana, one goddamn day.”
Hana let out an angry groan of frustration and slapped her hands on Claude’s chest, grabbing the lapels of his lab coat and pulling him forward. “I never wanted this! I’m not doing it!”
They squabbled for another few minutes, young Cliff staring at his velcro-up shoes and distracting himself trying to remember how the last nanny had taught him how to tie laces. He’d forgotten how after his mom fired her, because Cliff had been too attached to her.
“You can’t leave him here Hana, I’m working,” Claude said finally, pinching the bridge of his nose in frustration.
“Well figure it out, because I’m not taking him home with me,” Hana snapped back. With that she stalked out of the office, not stopping despite Claude shouting after her. He followed her out, and Cliff was left alone in his dad’s office, on his big spinny office chair, with no idea what he was supposed to do now. He was old enough to know that his parents didn’t like him, although he didn’t understand why. He didn’t talk much but they still said he was too noisy. His big sister Moira was nice to him, but that was when she was around. Usually she was too busy with her high school friends and sports to be home much.
Cliff tried to climb down from the chair, but it was really tall and he was afraid of falling. Still, he eased his lower half down, stretching his short legs to try and feel for the floor. He felt it all at once when he fell, smacking his forehead on the hard floor. He bit his lip, trying not to cry. His parents hated when he cried. Still, he couldn’t help it as a few little tears rolled down his chubby cheeks.
“Did you fall, honey?”
Cliff looked up to find a young woman kneeling in front of him. He nodded, wiping his face with tiny fists. “Aw, poor thing,” she said.
“He’s my son. Do you like kids?” Dr. Barrows was back, standing in the doorway - without Cliff’s mom.
“Yeah, totally,” the girl said. “Sorry Dr. Barrows, it’s just I heard a kid crying and the door was open so-”
“It’s fine,” Cliff’s father responded. “Actually, I need you to watch him for the rest of the day.”
“M-me? But, um, I’m a medical student, I don’t think...”
“Part of being a doctor is doing what your attending orders, and I’m telling you to babysit my kid until my shift ends at seven,” Dr. Barrows said sharply. “Is that a problem?”
“No - I mean, sort of, my clinical ends at four, and-”
“Great. I don’t care what you do with him, just keep him out of the way. I’ll pay you for your time.” Dr. Barrows ignored any further protest from the student and shoved two hundred-dollar bills in her hand before leaving.
The student shook her head in disbelief. “Alright, Cliff is it?” She asked. Cliff nodded, clutching the hem of his shirt nervously. “Right. Well, Cliff, I guess it’s you and me until seven...”
The student was nice, all things considered, but she clearly had no interest in babysitting. She had long legs and walked so quickly that Cliff had to run to keep up. A lot of times she’d turn a corner before he did and he thought he’d lost her, but she always found him again. They ate lunch in the cafeteria and she let him draw with a pen and a piece of printer paper while she did work. Cliff honestly didn’t understand what was going on, but he went with it because he was taught not to complain and didn't want to be left behind.
It was around 5pm when the student said, “You’d rather be with your dad, right? He has a pretty cool facial reconstruction starting now. Let’s go watch.” She led Cliff to the gallery, a large room with chairs above the surgical theater with a glass window for an audience. Cliff’s dad was scrubbed in, hyper focused and didn’t notice the spectators. “The surgery will last a few hours,” the student told Cliff. “I’m going home, so just stay here and don’t move until your dad comes and gets you.”
Cliff looked at her, confused. She was going to leave him here by himself? “It’s fine,” she said. “Your dad’s right down there. Just stay where you are and whatever you do, don’t move from this room, got it?” Cliff had no other choice but to nod obediently. Then he was alone.
At first, Cliff was excited to see what his dad did for work. A large woman was lying on the table - sleeping, Cliff thought - and everybody was dressed in funny clothes. His dad was wearing a long mint gown, goggles and a puffy scrub cap, which made him laugh. That laughter died in his throat when he saw his father take a long, silver knife and cut into the sleeping woman’s face.
Cliff screamed, but nobody was there to hear him. He started to panic and it felt like there was no air in the room. There was blood and the sound of a drill. Cliff began to cry, but he couldn’t tear his eyes away from the horrible scene. His father seemed to be tearing this lady’s face apart, and he did so for two hours before pulling the skin back up and sewing it all back together.
“Wonderful,” his father said in a confident tone. “Good work gentlemen.” Someone was helping him take off his bloody robes. At this moment, he finally looked up at what should have been an empty gallery, but instead he saw his traumatized three year old son. “What the hell? Is that my son?” Cliff heard him say loudly. Cliff was terrified. What if his father got mad and did the same thing to him? He hid under a chair in the corner of the gallery until his father flew into the room and dragged him out.
“I’m sorry, I stayed like she told me to, I’m sorry,” Cliff sobbed. He was so scared, pushing his father’s face away. He kept thinking of how bloody his dad’s hands had been. “Don’t hit me!”
“Cliff, shut up, you’re embarrassing me,” Claude said angrily. “It’s not your fault though, that stupid medical student - her career is over,” he growled. “Come on. Let’s go home.” He picked Cliff up and carried his crying child out of the hospital, and together they went home. They never talked about what Cliff had seen, but for years he had nightmares about it. He was scared of what his father was capable of, and every time Claude yelled at him or hit him, Cliff wondered if it would go further - if he’d end up on that table being cut up next if he didn’t behave.
By the time Cliff reached middle school, he understood that his father’s job was to be a surgeon and that he actually helped people, even if it was scary - and horrible - to see in person. But when he had his stomach ulcer and had to be hospitalized for a few days, his fear of hospitals was renewed and solidified. His parents were furious at him. Even with a fever and in so much pain, his father yelled at him every step of the way. Every time Cliff cried, or threw up, or panicked because he was afraid of needles, it was made ten times worse by his parents’ obsession with Cliff not spoiling their image of what a perfect son should be like. The pressure they put on him while he was in the hospital just made him sicker. It was a terrible experience, and Cliff vowed never to let himself get sick enough to end up in a hospital again.
Unfortunately, these sorts of decisions are not truly one’s own. Now Cliff was in the hospital with pneumonia, and although he was eighteen and told himself he was an adult who knew better, he was still scared. It was a different hospital, but everything smelled the same. The nurses acted the same - nice, but brisk. He felt the same helpless feeling of being surrounded by people who didn’t understand him, and most of all he was terrified of his father finding out he was here. He was sure he’d be furious if he discovered Cliff had ended up here after disrespecting his mother by leaving home. He thought about ripping the IV tubing out of his arm and making a run for it, but he didn’t think his legs would hold him.
When Elliot was next to him, Cliff felt like he could keep it together. After all, he’d never had someone like Elliot to hold on to during these scary moments before. But now Elliot had gone home for the night and Cliff was alone in a tiny room without windows in the hospital, and he was losing it.
Cliff didn’t realize he was having a panic attack until the nurse came in because his heart monitor was going off. She tried to settle him down, speaking to him in hushed tones and reassuring him that he was safe, but he didn’t believe her. All he could think about was his prior bad experiences in hospitals. His entire chest felt tight and he was crying, which made it difficult to breathe in conjunction with his already junky lungs.
“Cliff, you need to slow down your breathing for me,” the nurse said, but Cliff couldn’t. He couldn’t control it. He was just as scared as the day he’d hid under the chair above the operating room from his father, abandoned and afraid to trust anybody.
The thing that did stop him panicking was the uncontrollable coughing fit that came on. All the tears and snot that came with crying choked him, and then he couldn’t stop. He coughed until he vomited onto his lap, tears and mucus mixing into a horrible puddle that he could feel seeping through the sheets onto his legs. He was so disgusting, he couldn’t stand himself. Elliot was right to leave him here alone.
The nurse called the other nurse for backup, and soon they were changing Cliff’s sheets together, changing his nasal cannula to a simple face mask while he was so snotty from crying, and one of them administered something through his IV that made him feel sleepy. Cliff’s nurse asked him if it would make him feel better to call his boyfriend.
“What time is it?” Cliff asked, his voice hoarse from crying and throwing up.
“Eleven,” she told him.
Cliff shook his head no. He had already woken Elliot up enough times this week. “It’s okay. He’s probably asleep.” They hadn't agreed on a time that Elliot was going to come back, Cliff realized. Elliot had said he’d be back in the morning. The morning could be eight, or it could be as late as noon. That was, if Elliot came back at all. No, he'd come back. Elliot kept his word - usually. Then again, Cliff had never expected Elliot to trick him into coming to the hospital. He understood he was really sick and needed help, he did, but the betrayal still stung.
After his nurse did another albuterol treatment through the mask, she changed Cliff back to a new (not snot-clogged) nasal cannula and left him to get some sleep. Cliff couldn’t rest though. Even with the lights off, all the machines cast a glow that kept the room too bright. The faint beeping of his heart monitor and the drip of his IV fluids reminded him too much of the last time he was in the hospital, and he felt vaguely nauseous despite being sure there was nothing left in his stomach. He curled in a tight ball and held his knees to his chest, trembling. He missed Elliot and wished he was here to make him feel safer right now. Instead, all he had was himself and a very long night ahead of him.
~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~
Cliff woke up drenched in sweat. He didn’t know where he was and immediately began to panic, but then he felt someone pushing him back down and shushing him.
“Elliot?” Cliff blinked in confusion. He’d finally cried himself to sleep in the wee hours of the morning but he hadn’t expected to sleep long enough that it was already within business hours. “What time is it?” His voice crackled, laden with wetness, and he let out a congested, barking cough. It made his sides ache and he gripped them automatically.
Elliot smiled at him and ran a delicate hand through Cliff’s damp hair. “Hi baby,” he said fondly. “It’s about nine AM.”
“Really?” Cliff glanced around, slowly remembering the details of yesterday. “I’m so hot,” he muttered.
“I think your fever broke,” Elliot said gently. “How do you feel?”
Cliff considered things. He felt significantly less achy than last night and it was easier to breathe. He didn’t feel like his brain was entirely full of sand - maybe just halfway. “Better,” he said. “Can I go home?”
“That’s up to the doctor,” Elliot said. “I ordered you some breakfast though. Do you feel up to eating? I got you oatmeal and toast.”
Cliff grimaced, remembering all the vomiting he’d done yesterday. “I’m not sure.”
“You can see how you feel when it gets here,” Elliot said. “The nurse said your breathing got a lot better after your second steroid injection.”
Only now did Cliff notice the lack of oxygen tubing on his face. He’d fallen asleep with it on and Cliff was shocked he’d really been so passed out that the nurse had been able to give him IV meds, do vitals, and remove his oxygen without waking him up. He must have been truly exhausted.
“Thanks for coming back,” Cliff said suddenly, looking at his hands instead of Elliot’s face.
“Of course I came back,” Elliot responded. “I promised you, didn’t I?”
Promises didn’t always work out, Cliff thought to himself, but he just nodded yes. “Well, I missed you,” was all he responded. “So thanks.”
He was surprised by the quick kiss that Elliot stole from him, even though he hadn’t brushed his teeth since yesterday morning. “E-Elliot,” he stuttered, red faced as he sat back and covered his mouth with his hands in embarrassment.
“I missed you too,” Elliot said. His smile was so kind and genuine. It made Cliff feel so much better. “You did incredible staying here overnight by yourself.”
Cliff understood that Elliot was babying him a little, but he also realized that he was unable to stop himself from smiling into his hands. Something inside him felt so content when Elliot was proud of him. He wanted to feel like that over and over.
Breakfast arrived and Cliff picked at the food, trying to get down a few bites mostly because Elliot was staring at him so hopefully. He really wasn’t hungry, but he managed half of a piece of toast and two bites of oatmeal before he couldn’t manage any more. It was difficult to eat when his cough was still so harsh, overtaking him at random moments and leaving him doubled over in bed, his arms clutching his sides in pain. At least he managed to keep the food down, though.
The doctor came by shortly after Cliff finished eating and examined him. He listened to Cliff’s lungs and cough, nodding along with his own conclusions. “I believe it’s safe to send you home, but you have to promise to rest and do nothing else for several more days,” he said finally. “How does that sound to you?”
Cliff nodded in agreement. He’d gladly stay in Elliot’s bed for another week if it meant getting rid of this awful cough - preferably, far away from any hospitals. Elliot awkwardly raised his hand a little before speaking. “Excuse me Doctor, but we start classes back at school in the city on Monday. Will he be okay by then?”
“Hmm. You’ll have to play that by ear, but as long as he gets proper rest and takes his meds, no fevers, then probably. Do you have to walk far to get to class?”
Cliff shrugged. Sometimes, not always. Elliot answered for him though. “I’ll make sure he doesn’t walk too much,” his boyfriend said confidently.
“In that case, I’m not concerned about discharging him,” the doctor said. “I’ll put in the orders and we’ll have you out of here in a few hours. I do recommend you keep using a nebulizer at home for a few days and as needed, do you have one?”
Cliff shook his head no at the same time Elliot said, “We’ll get one for him, we just need the medicine.”
“You’ve got someone taking good care of you, I see,” the doctor chuckled. “I’ll write scripts for that too then. Make sure you follow up with an asthma doctor as soon as you can.”
Elliot thanked the doctor several times, Cliff echoing the sentiment with a simple thank you, and then all they had to do was wait for paperwork. In the meantime the nurse helped Cliff get back into normal clothes, took out his IV and detached him from all the equipment. He had sticky residue on his finger and chest from the oxygen and heart monitoring leeds that didn’t seem to want to come off, but it didn’t matter. He’d have plenty of time to scrub it off later. Cliff was just relieved to be escaping this place without a longer stay or his father finding out and showing up.
At discharge, Elliot bundled Cliff up in a warm jacket and hat even though it was late August. He pushed Cliff in a wheelchair down to the lobby, then ran to get the car. Cliff insisted he could walk, but he wasn’t entirely convinced of his own strength right now so didn’t push the matter much. He waited patiently for Elliot and waited to feel relieved for when they had officially left the premises of the hospital. It had only been one night, but it felt like a long time. The fresh air felt good on his skin and he took a deep breath, appreciating it even as it made him cough.
Elliot pulled up at patient pickup and helped Cliff into the car, settling him in the passenger’s seat. “My mom’s gonna pick up all your meds and find a nebulizer for you at home,” he explained as he drove. “We’re going to follow all the directions to a tee, get you straightened up before we head back to school this weekend.” He sounded confident about this plan, as if it were foolproof. “Do you want to shower when we get home, or go straight to bed?”
“Shower,” Cliff said. He didn’t want to smell like a hospital anymore. “Sorry about all this.”
Elliot shook his head. “It’s okay. I mean... I was really scared. But you’re going to be fine, so...”
“That’s what I mean,” Cliff said, looking at Elliot seriously. “I’m sorry for scaring you. And being a burden and crying and... I guess what I’m really trying to say is thank you for being there.”
Suddenly there were tears running down Elliot’s cheeks and Cliff panicked. “Wait, no, I’m sorry, I didn’t mean to make you cry!”
Elliot pulled over on the curb and wiped his eyes. He sniffled and gave a tiny laugh at the same time, which sounded funny to Cliff. “I’m just really glad you’re okay,” Elliot said, taking Cliff’s hand in his own and squeezing it. “And you’re welcome. But you’re not a burden and it’s okay. I love all of you, Cliff. When you’re sick or scared and lonely... I want to be there for you. Do you understand that?”
Cliff didn’t answer right away, not trusting his own voice not to waver right now. But finally he said, “I’m trying to.” It was more honest than the automatic ‘Yes’ he had very nearly said.
Elliot smiled a little sadly and leaned over to give Cliff a kiss on the cheek. “Okay, as long as you’re trying to,” he said. He looked both fond and sad. “Now let’s get you home and in bed. We’ve got a big school year waiting for us next week and you’re not getting out of that bed until Friday.”
“The nurse said a little exercise is good,” Cliff pointed out.
“Some very light exercise,” Elliot said. “Bed to couch and back is plenty. Got it?”
Cliff smiled. He found it amusing when Elliot got bossy. “Sure,” he said. “You’re in charge, El.”
Elliot grinned and started driving again. “You’re damn right I am.”
Fin.
#shionwrites#sickfic#oc: cliff#oc: elliot#hospital setting#illness whump#pneumonia fic#sicknario#fever whump#sick whump#angst#tw: minor whump#male whump#oc sickfic#whump#bad things happen bingo#paralyzed by fear#novemetober rescheduled#novemetober 2023#day 24#panic#emeto#tw: emeto
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uhm rick angst yay
#I was gunna qoute what em said but iforgot what he said#rick and morty season 7#rick and morty art#rick and morty#rick and morty fanart#rick sanchez#my art#digital art#fanart#blood#tw blood#ill tag it as that even if its jus minor#angst#do you want my dinner#i dont want it
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Sunset on Summerville
Sunset on Summerville
by ArthurianScribe
Unexpectedly time traveling back into your fifteen-year-old body is stressful at the best of times, but doing so after losing a war you can't tell anyone about brings it to a new level.
Lucky for Shouto, he doesn't have to do this alone.
Words: 4828, Chapters: 1/2, Language: English
Series: Part 3 of Moments Become Memories
Fandoms: 僕のヒーローアカデミア | Boku no Hero Academia | My Hero Academia
Rating: Teen And Up Audiences
Warnings: No Archive Warnings Apply
Categories: Gen
Characters: Todoroki Shouto, Midoriya Izuku, Todoroki Fuyumi, Todoroki Natsuo, Todoroki Enji | Endeavor, Midoriya Inko, Bakugou Katsuki
Relationships: Todoroki Shouto & Todoroki Siblings, Midoriya Izuku & Todoroki Shouto
Additional Tags: POV Third Person Limited, POV Todoroki Shouto, POV Midoriya Izuku, Todoroki Shouto-centric, Time Travel Fix-It, Implied/Referenced Post-Traumatic Stress Disorder, Post-Traumatic Stress Disorder - PTSD, Implied/Referenced Depression, Canonical Child Abuse, Emotional/Psychological Abuse, it's a todorki fic afterall, Todoroki Enji | Endeavor's Bad Parenting, Abusive Todoroki Enji | Endeavor, Angst, Hurt/Comfort, Emotional Hurt/Comfort, Complicated Relationships, Friendship, could be read as tododeku, Todoroki "Ride or Die" Shouto, i will make that a searchable tag so help me god, Todoroki Shouto is Bad at Feelings, Todoroki Shouto Needs a Hug, Todoroki Shouto Gets A Hug, Midoriya Izuku Needs A Hug, Midoriya Izuku Gets A Hug, Everyone Gets A Hug, Midoriya Izuku Has a Quirk, Midoriya Izuku Has One for All Quirk, Good Sibling Todoroki Fuyumi, Good Sibling Todoroki Natsuo, Protective Todoroki Fuyumi, Protective Todoroki Natsuo, Protective Siblings, Autistic Todoroki Shouto, it's important to me that you know that, takes place between entrance exam and start of classes, Beta Read, first time i get to use that tag!, Smart Midoriya Izuku, Can't believe I almost forgot that one
Read Here: https://archiveofourown.org/works/44439271
#AO3 Feed#FanFiction#AO3 Shouto#♡#Shouto Todoroki#Izuku Midoriya#Fuyumi Todoroki#Natsuo Todoroki#Minor Tododeku#❄️🔥#R:T#A:Arthurian#Quirk AU#Time Travel#Mental Illness#Abuse#Hurt Comfort#Angst
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The Fairy
TW: Burning of a whole village, Depression, Death, Implied Hunting, Gore, Murder, Killing, everything I have failed to mention
MINORS DO NOT INTERACT!!!
YOU HAVE BEEN WARNED
༺★☆★☆𓁹☆★☆★༻
A girl was discovered in the ‘Forbidden Forest'. She was petite and pale with long blond hair and almost translucent eye with silver wings, everyone was in awe at the sight of her. A couple adopted the girl and named her Mary.
Mary was the towns beauty, she was everything every girl envied, every man’s fantasies, even the church calls her an angel cause of her wings. Everything was perfect for her or as what she perceives as perfect. But why did it turn into this.
The town burned down with no survivors except her, Mary's world was crushed, silver liquid began flowing out of her eyes, she was hurt, or was this that simple?
She did not know.
Mary did not do anything for days but cry, she sobbed until there was nothing left to cry. A traveler found her, she was dirty, the traveler thought she was a beggar, the traveler was also surprised to see her wings. The traveler looked around and deduced that the woman was the sole survivor of the town. The Traveler crouched down at Mary's level.
“Are you able to stand up girl?”
Mary only looked at him with her reddened eyes then blacked out.
_
_
_
She was now accustomed to the traveling life, she thought it was much better than staying in one place. Mary was still traumatized at what happened, she blamed herself but The Traveler assured her that it was just an accident. It was not her fault, it was simply fate. She did not think so, she really blamed herself but she had nothing to prove that it was her fault.
Her life with The Traveler healed Mary a bit, every day was a new experience of her, she learns something new everyday with traveling.
Her companion—the traveler confused Mary, he looked liked a woman but she acts like a man. She did not bother to asked as to what the traveler is, Mary feared The Traveler. They were camping outside a village
“You know your kind is being hunted!”
Mary did not know how she would react with that information
“Where did you here that rumor?”
“I just heard whispers when I went shopping”
Now what would she do, she would not be able to conceal her identity as she did not learn how to, she looked at The Traveler
“Would you rat me out?”
The Traveler seemed to ponder for an answer but shakes his head, that enough gave Mary comfort.
“Do you know how to conceal your wings?”
“I was abandoned in a forest so no!”
The Traveler hummed “That would be difficult”
Mary felt guilty, she did not want to burden The Traveler, she survived cause of The Traveler, she was able to feel happy again cause of the Traveler, she had to come up with something
“I would wear a cloak for the mean time, to conceal my wings of course”
The Traveler did not say something and that did not help with Mary's nerves. Night creeped up at the sky, Mary went inside her own tent and laid down at her bedding, she thought of other ways to hide her wings. That in turn exhausted Mary and she drifted into Dreamland.
Mary did not notice someone coming in her tent, they laid her in her stomach. She felt immense pain mainly at her back, her eyes shot open, there was silver liquid every where and she was The Traveler with a knife on their hand, she screamed bloody murder as she saw her wings in his other hand.
The pain was torturous, terror creeped unto her body, she was shaking uncontrollably and tears once again fell from her eyes. The Traveler did not react whatsoever
“That should solve our problem Mary”
She looked at The Traveler with fear, she couldn’t believe she trusted that bastard, she did everything The Traveler said, she was obedient, she sat when The Traveler said so, she did chores and errands for The Traveler, she was swept away from her thoughts when another wave of pain roamed her body and she wept, she wept more than she did when the town burned down.
Her identity was stripped away from her, she did not know what to do but wept.
‘Oh dear creator why have you punished me liked this?’ she thought to herself ‘What did I do to deserve this?’ but instead of the shooting sound as an answer, check could not hear anything anymore. No more since she was robbed of her magic. Even though she did not learn the degree of her powers, she at least knew she had them.
With that she felt a connection to her past but now it was all gone, she was nothing anymore, not since that monster took it all away.
‘Yes! The Traveler took everything away from me! I must bring it back to me, I must bring it back to where it belonged. It’s mine, The Traveler did not have the right to take it away from Mary. It was a blessing from the Creator!’
Mary stood up, with little power left she walked out the tent, she was like a zombie—lifeless, without purpose, but no she had purpose. Mary saw The Traveler, she walked towards him. When she was near enough she strangled him, The Traveler was bigger than her so The Traveler easily over powered Mary, she was thrown into the ground.
Anger is like wind that blows out the lamp of the mind
Her hand touched something hard and big, she stood and lift the object with all her might, she threw it at The Traveler which hit The Traveler's head
The Traveler fell which gave Mary the opportunity to sit on top of The Traveler, she smashed the object again and again and again and again in The Traveler’s face.
Red covered Mary, she was heaving, she looked at her hands trembling with adrenaline. She smiled, she realized she did not get back what she wanted, then it dawned on her. It was all for nothing.
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Title: "Hello"
Sypnosis: Se Eun wants Koa, Ethan wants Koa— Koa wants Ethan. They should really talk, though. The clock is ticking.
Pairing: Se Eun / Koa Ethan / Koa Se Eun / Koa / Ethan
Genre: smut, angst, fluff, psychological, FIRST POV
Warnings: non/dub-con, exhibitionism, toxic relationships, physical abuse, emotional abuse, sexual abuse, violence, graphic descriptions, sadism, torture, dehumanization, cheating, stalking, unreliable narrator, bullying, underage drinking/drug use, codependency, manipulation, religious imagery, hurt/comfort, issues, lack of communication, slow burn, bad ending, bittersweet ending
Note: I saw Round 6 and I decided to get into the doomed love wagon. Strap in. I'm going to get your hopes up, then stomping them out like it wasn't just straight-up fluff a few words ago. I will not give a good ending. This has been my legally required PSA in case I get doxxed for my writing. Please take care of your mental health. Se Eun was also inspired by a bot, Koa and Ethan are my OCs.
ONCE AGAIN. MINORS DNI. I DID NOT WRITE THIS WITH YOUR VANILLA THOUGHTS IN MIND.
BOT CHAT HERE: https://character.ai/chat/vlHS8fvmea4oC2yylPaNP1uqg-l7weE8q3ShH-qJKtE
Chapter 1: Please/Don't Let Go
♡♡♡ Koa's POV ♡♡♡
Three of Se Eun's fingers swirled around my tongue, my lips forced to part to make room for him. His hips grinding against my skirt, a muffled moan leaving my throat. His other hand tightens around my waist as he forces my hips to meet him halfway.
“Fuuuccckkk~ You're killing me here, you know that?”
Se Eun groans out, pushing me forward onto a desk. My back bends forward, my stomach pressed against the cherry wood. His hands trail up to the hem of my shirt, my skin prickling up at the feeling of his hand on my bare skin. Se Eun's hips were still slowly rubbing against me— I could feel just how excited he was, even with all of our clothes on.
“Shit. You're so lucky that I love you enough.”
Love? Could this really count as love? I've seen love before, I've been so close to it that I could practically taste it. I know love like it's the back of my hand, so why would he call this love?
His fingers continue to thrust themselves into my tongue, drool and tears dripping onto the desk I was down against. I stay silent even as his hand makes its way under my bra. I felt so dirty doing this, like I was a rag doll for Se Eun to play with.
His hand fondles my flushed skin, his handling a bit too rough to not leave any bruises. I shuddered at the sensation, swallowing down a sob that threatened to escape from my chest. My ears flush red when Se Eun's lips brush against the tip of my ear— mumbling out in a volume that only I could hear.
“If I didn't love you… I would've just used you up like a common whore. I wouldn't have listened to you if you told me, no…”
I gasp when Se Eun's grip on my breast tightens to the point of being painful; his fingers shoved deep down enough for me to choke. My tears fall faster from the pain as I squirm around in discomfort.
“I'm such a good husband, right?”
It takes me nodding frantically to his delusions for him to finally laxen his hold on me. The moment his fingers slowly leave my throat, I cough from the sudden increase of air in my lungs. Se Eun only watches me as if he was observing an avante garde painting from a museum display. My entire body trembles in fear under his gaze.
“You're so beautiful when you cry.”
Se Eun whispers in awe— grabbing my face to turn my eyes to him. I couldn't help but cry harder at his words. Just how did I catch the eye of Se Eun? The demon who haunts my school life, who won't stop until I'm completely his.
His lips place soft kisses on top of my eyelids, my eyelashes fluttering at the foreign, yet familiar feeling. It was Se Eun that was behind me, but I couldn't help but wish that another person was taking his place instead. Blonde hair instead of black, blue eyes instead of a dark brown…
I get snapped out of my thoughts when Se Eun steals my breath. My eyes turn glassy as he cards his fingers through my undone hair. His tongue shoved into my mouth before he pulled away shortly to flip me to my back.
My cheeks flush into a bright red when I realize how damp my underwear was from Se Eun's constant grinding. He pulls me into a rough kiss again as he continues to grind his clothed groin against my damp underwear. The fabric was sticking to my skin, showing Se Eun a perfect visual of my most intimate area. I regretted wearing white, I was practically see-through.
“Look at you… All nice and wet just for me~”
Se Eun purrs out, pulling away from my lips as his hands force my thighs to split further. I whimper at his action, feeling ashamed of my current position that left little to the imagination. I only shudder when I see him licking his lips at the sight of me, my stomach twisting in disgust, fear, and nausea.
This was disgusting.
I flinch when his finger experimentally pokes at the wet fabric, another shameful whimper escaping from me. My back arching when his finger stays there, twisting itself deeper into the fabric. My back arches as I moan from the pleasure, my thighs trembling as I resist the urge to close my legs. My tears refuse to stop, a strange mix between a sob and a moan creeping up my throat.
“Are you sure you don't want me to go further?”
Se Eun voices out, his tone mocking as his finger only goes deeper. The fabric of my underwear was the only barrier between him and my womb. I quickly shake my head in refusal. I didn't even want him to do this much! So many of my first times were already stolen by Se Eun, I didn't want him to steal the most important one. …Even if it'll never be given to the one I want the most.
“Hmmm… Suit yourself…”
Se Eun hums out, seemingly nonchalant even if the bulge under his trousers said a different story. My breath hitches as he pulls my legs up, my neck straining itself from my position. The back of my knees are forced onto his shoulders before I moan out loudly. I immediately cover my lips with both of my hands as his lips and teeth bite onto the fabric. Sucking out the fluids from my panties loudly, drooling onto the fabric as well. His teeth dig into my skin under the fabric as well— every bite, every kiss… I could feel everything.
My breathing quickens as I begin to pant from the stimulation. His tongue sticking out to lap at my fluids— digging into the fabric like his finger did just a few seconds ago.
“Mmm~ You taste so sweet… How am I holding myself back again?”
Se Eun mutters against my skin, sending pleasurable vibrations throughout me. His nose presses itself against my panties as he takes a deep sniff of it. My body freezes up at his gesture, a mixture of horror and repulsion muddling my brain.
“P-p-promise…”
I stammered out, hurriedly interrupting Se Eun's thought process. Hiccups litter my words from crying too much, my breasts, lips, and waist bruised from his rough embrace. After a while I realized that my panties were now wet from both my fluids and Se Eun's saliva— disturbed by the sensation, I voiced out my concerns.
“...Hey… I don't have a change of underwear with me…”
“All the better. I want you to walk around with me on you.”
♡♡♡ Ethan's POV ♡♡♡
I look at Koa as she speaks, rambling about an assignment that interested her. I caught small bits of her words, something about pink glitter pens and sparkles— but my mind was somewhere else. My mind was thinking of how beautiful she looks. I stare at Koa's lips, her pretty lip gloss doing nothing but accentuating her already cute face. Her smile, her sparkling eyes… Everything about her made my heart race.
Koa… My lovely flower. I hope you'll continue to bloom for me to see.
“Ethan?”
I'm jerked out of my thoughts by Koa's voice, her eyes staring at me in confusion. I looked down on my hand, and I realized that my fingers were pinching Koa's hair between them. My cheeks are dusted with pink in embarrassment— my hand immediately pulling away to make up for my error. I raise my palm up as a sign of genuine surrender, my words sincerely apologetic.
“S-sorry- Y-you're fine, right? I know you don't like people touching you- Once again, Koa. I'm so sorry-”
“I don't mind.”
My throat immediately clogged up at her words, my brain unable to process the syllables that came out of Koa’s pink lips. I was skeptical of her words, Koa was always someone who put others before herself. Delicate, sweet Koa… I can't even remember how many people confessed to her during our years together. She was always so kind that everyone wanted to find a way to stay with her.
“Koa… Why do you keep on rejecting people?” I asked her one day, out of nowhere— yet another person came, and got rejected by her. I didn't have the courage to openly admit it, but my heart weighs less every time she refuses a love confession.
Koa turns her head to me— her eyes still bewitching me, even at our young age. I prayed to every entity imaginable that she wouldn't notice the loud pounding of my heart when she leans in closer to me. A teasing smile on her lips that I desperately wanted to press my thumb against. What was it today? Cherry? Blueberry? Mint?
“Hm? Well… I already have a certain someone my heart is set on!” My heart squeezes painfully at her words. I wanted to know who that person was; I wanted to know so I could beg them to teach me how to take Koa's heart as well. I don't say anything— just smiling at her softly as a sour taste creeps up my throat. My fingers tightened around the fabric of my jeans.
Koa must have gotten nervous from my silence, immediately clearing up her words in a panic. It wasn't fair that she could still be so stunning, even while stumbling over her own words. All I could do was smile at her— hoping that my bitterness didn't leak through my mask.
“W-well- Y-you're just such a good friend to me and I would hate to ruin our friendship over something like this, you know?”
“Pft- Don't be such a dork, Koa. You already have the nerd part down, are you trying to speed-run your life into a loser?”
“E-Ethan?!”
I laugh at her pouting face, her sparkling eyes on the brink of tears. I wanted to wipe them away, -and maybe kiss them- but I knew my place. That’s fine, though— I’ll be her kind, childhood friend. I can love Koa from the dark… As long as I can stay by Koa's side, it'll be fine if she doesn't see me as a romantic partner.
My love is enough for the both of us.
♡♡♡ Se Eun's POV ♡♡♡
“Fuck. Can't you move faster, whore?”
I click my tongue as I lean against the wall, a cigarette between my fingers. I lick my lips before glaring at her— the whiny, nameless bitch on her knees; loudly choking on my cock. The hair color was right, but the texture was off. Too much hairspray for my hand to comfortably touch. It wasn't soft, nor smooth; too brittle from what I imagine to be years of bleaching. It was honestly hilarious that more than half of the female body, in this hellhole of an institute, dyed their hair back to black once I got interested in a certain, pretty bird.
I sigh in irritation, tilting my head back as my hand fists the back of the slut's hair. If I closed my eyes long enough, I could imagine someone else at her place instead. A certain someone who cries too easily, and stays quiet for as long as she can. A groan escapes from me at the idea of Koa, on her knees, servicing me in a club room with other men watching us. Fuck… That would be so hot.
I'd threaten her to give it her all, or she'll also be forced to service all of my other friends as well. She'd obediently get on her knees like the pretty doll she is— her trembling fingers slowly taking off my belt reverently. Her touch was nothing but addictive; so gentle and soft with me…
I wanted all of that for myself.
My fantasies are abruptly broken by a fake moan from the replacement. No… A replacement would have the actual skills to replace Koa. I was just using a cheap knock-off of the actual product.
I pull out of the bitch's mouth, the idiot having the gall to make a show of her swallowing down my pre-cum. My dick was probably coated all over in her saliva and lipstick by now. My eyes narrow at her, visually disgusted by her skills.
“Mmmm~ How did I do?”
Her irritating voice grates my ears as I pull her up by the hair. I stay silent, deciding to roughly grab onto her face as an alternative. It'll probably leave a bruise, but I couldn't give a single fuck about that. Knowing how whores work, she'd probably stupidly flaunt it around school like it was a badge of honor; or something like that. I take a drag of my cigarette before I smash my lips onto her— breathing the ashy air into her lungs.
My eyes glisten at the sight of her choking, her expression finally genuine for the first time since I called her in. The wannabe prostitute's eyes widen when her precious air is cut off; I reach a point to when I had to forcefully suppress a chuckle at her expression. Her hand darts up to her throat, coughing until I think a lung may have ruptured. A predatory grin stretches onto my lips as I grab a fistful of the slut's hair; forcing her to look me in the eye. The tears, the fear— I lick my teeth eagerly, finally seeing something interesting for once. My dick was rock-hard at the sight as I took another drag of my cigarette— calmly blowing the smoke directly onto her face. Except, I was all too impatient to finally come from this cheap bitch's hole.
“Bend over, whore.”
…
I take a drag of a new cigarette— lazily draped across the couch as the slut bounces on top of my lap like a bitch in heat. Her mouth has long since been gagged by her panties, her tears not exciting me anymore. The room was filled with the sound of: skin slapping on skin, loud moans and groans, and whimpers and sobs. I lazily scroll through my phone as I yawn. I make a mental note to not use this one again.
Her skin was marred with the attention that she wanted so badly from me. Her throat was covered in purple and red, hand-shaped bruises scattered throughout her skin. Her once tamed hair was nothing but a mess after I was done with her. The whore's lipstick was messed up, the bitter taste of the wax coating my tongue. I couldn't help but admire my work, proof of my time with her.
My gaze breaks from her flushed skin when my phone buzzes. My lips curl into a satisfied smile when I realize that it was from the pretty bird I wanted to catch. I don't even have to hire people to watch her for me! Koa's such a good girl for me— always obedient to her master. I let the slut continue to pant and slobber all over me; I was only concentrating on my phone at this point.
Wife♡: I'm home now.
I smirk at Koa's message, pressing my thumb onto the icon to dial her number in. The call takes exactly one ring before she picks up, a melodic voice ringing into my ears. My smile brightens, my pretty wife's quiet mumbling was like a breath of fresh air in the middle of this debauchery.
“...Hello-?”
I finally make an effort to be a part of the slutty bitch's pleasure— grabbing onto her hips before thrusting my hips up. A loud, muffled screech sounding out from under her makeshift gag. I could already imagine Koa's lively eyes widening at the tortured sound. I could practically see how her cheeks would flush into a deep pink; pressing her palm against the lips that I like to bite so much. A curse leaves my own lips as I feel myself harden painfully at the thought.
I needed Koa. I needed to see her, to touch her… To fuck her.
I roughly grab the whore’s face, digging my fingers into her mouth to remove the soaked fabric. I drop the soiled panties onto the already disgusting floor— the club room now looking like some kind of back-of-the-alley clubhouse. I whisper into the slut's ear quietly, my grip on her painful.
“Be as loud as possible.”
I hiss out before pulling away from her ear— forcing her onto her knees and hands. I immediately thrust into her loose hole, still gaping from her time with me. My hand entangled in the whore's disheveled hair as I pressed her face against the velvet couch.
“...Se Eun-?”
“Mmn~ A-ah~!”
I snicker as the whiny bitch cries and moans, my phone carefully placed on top of the coffee table in front of us. I wanted to see just how red Koa was right now. I wanted to feel how wet she was from hearing this. I wanted to devour her flushed skin and mark them with a riding crop. I wanted her to beg me to fuck her, for her to admit that she didn't want me to wait for marriage anymore.
I wanted to break Koa, I wanted her addicted to me. I wanted her to look at me with those same eyes she uses for that bottomfeeder.
I stub my cigarette out before fully manhandling the whore to move the way I wanted. Awkwardly angling her body to hit the deepest part of her cervix— driving a louder moan out of her. The opposite line was silent, so I obviously had to change that. I needed to know that Koa was hearing this… Maybe even touching herself to this…
“Tell me about your day.”
I command Koa— it wasn't a question, nor was it a suggestion. I wanted to know about her day. I wanted to know what she ate, what she wrote, who she talked to. It would've been better if she just stayed with me, but the princess wanted her “freedom.” It's honestly frustrating, she speaks as if I wouldn't give her freedom once we were married. She just won't be able to see anyone from her past anymore. It's not like that's a big deal, she has me now. I will be her past, present, and future— she just needs to stay at home and help raise our children. The life that all these bitches who jump on my dick are desperate for.
“...Se Eun… I don't think…”
The way Koa's voice broke was adorable, although it was annoying how loud the fucked-up whore was. Who cares, though? Koa's pretty voice made my mood ten times better than before. Her tone only made it obvious that she was already close to tears— tears I wouldn't hesitate to lap up if she was within my reach.
“Now.”
♡♡♡ Koa's POV ♡♡♡
I regretted picking up the phone. I only answered Se Eun's phone call because he would've kept on dialing in my number until I answered— but now I'm beginning to weigh on which option would be worse for me. Hanging up on Se Eun, or continuing the call; either is terrible for my mental health.
I force myself to take a deep breath, flinching as another moan rings out from Se Eun's side of the line. I bite onto my lower lip, my anxiety spiking at listening to such a private moment between two people. However… if I listened closely, -bringing the phone closer to my ear- there were multiple moans, from multiple voices, in the background. My cheeks flush into a deep, bright red when I realized what exactly he was doing.
“S-Se Eun… I don't think-”
Se Eun interrupts me, his breathing was normal— no panting, no gasps, no sharp intakes in breath. If it wasn't for the loudly obvious moans in the background, I would've thought that he was just lazing around somewhere private.
“Koa.”
Se Eun warns out in a growl, the moans suddenly getting louder in my ears. Shivers run down my spine as I swallow down my saliva dryly; a lump in my throat making it hard to swallow. My hands tremble in fear as I stumble through my words. An encompassing fear wrapping over my eyes, my voice cracking and stuttering with almost every word I manage to spew out.
“...W-we have an English p-p-project that's d-due tomorrow… I-I've started to d-decorate it with pens a-and markers…”
I hear a soft chuckle ringing out from the phone, my eyes softening when Se Eun points out a certain habit of mine. I can't lie to myself, he has the talent to bring anyone at ease.
“Let me guess. It's full of glitter and doodles now?”
It was almost like I could see his smug grin in front of me— his eyes peering into my mind, knowing every single one of my fears, my dreams, my emotions. I smile as I place a plushie onto my lap, resting my chin on top of the soft plush. My eyes wander to my desk, my colorful project displayed on it. A smile pulls itself onto my lips, my tone lighthearted as I reply to Se Eun's comment. He was… okay, sometimes.
“...It's like you're in my room right now.”
“Who knows? Maybe I am- A-ah~! Se Eun~! I-I'm gonna cum~!”
My relaxed body stiffens up at the sound, I almost forgot where he was in the midst of our conversation. A curse slipping out from his lips as a loud smack could be heard. I wince at the sound, pitying the girl that got slapped. Se Eun never held back on his hits— I had the bruises to prove it. My fingers subconsciously brush against my cheek; a phantom pain burning my skin. I instinctively recoil back from Se Eun's loud, degrading insults— forced to listen to every hit, every scream, every groan.
“Fuck! Shit! You fucking slutty bitch! I told you to be loud, but I didn't tell you to scream like some kind of third-rate pornstar! What kind of stray dog is louder than its owner?! What? You're gonna cum? Cum from my fucking foot like the useless bitch you are. Tch- This is what I get for sticking my dick in an untrained mutt that should’ve been put down already.”
My breath hitches at Se Eun's hurtful words— they weren't even pointed at me, but my heart still pounded in my chest. My head felt like it was full of cotton, my senses disconnected. I couldn't feel the plush in my arms, I couldn't hear Se Eun's loud cursing from the call, and I couldn't even breathe.
I suddenly suck in a sharp breath when Se Eun's voice gets louder. It sounded like he got closer to the phone, but the pained groans only got fainter. I could only pray that Se Eun just got farther from the girl instead of the darker alternative.
“Koa. Take off your underwear.”
Se Eun's order makes me freeze up, my throat dry as I stare at the phone blankly. What? Was Se Eun being serious, right now? My thighs rub together as I squeeze them shut, not wanting to obey his order. Not after what I just overheard. Not when the tortured groans of the woman were still ringing in my ears— weighing down on my conscience.
“...What..?”
“Do you want me to do it myself?”
That was enough of an incentive for me to immediately kick off my panties in a hurry. My cheeks flush red in shame, wearing a school uniform without my panties was humiliating— it didn't matter if I was in my room, I was vulnerable now. I feel a cold breeze brushing between my thighs; a shiver running down my spine from my exposure.
“Done…”
“Mmmm… Too bad, I wanted to do it for you.”
A wave of nausea crashes over me at the idea of Se Eun taking it further with me. I bite my tongue to swallow down my sob as I shift my body on the bed. I just wanted to get this over with, already. My voice was weak as I pushed away my resounding thoughts to speak— knowingly digging myself into a deeper grave with every syllable uttered.
“...Please… Just tell me what to do next…”
“Hm? Is my little wife getting impatient? Does my helpless Koa need her husband's help to make her come?”
“...Se Eun…”
I was on the verge of begging him at this point; my vision blurring from my unshed tears. I choke out Se Eun's name painfully, my breathing growing heavier as more and more time passes. My head was swirling with a wide array of emotions— each more averse to the other.
“Fuuuuuuck, Koa. You're killing me here… I'll just keep falling for you if you say my name like that.”
I don't say anything more, my voice refusing to work anymore. I just hoped that Se Eun would stop his constant teasing and move on already.
In more ways than one.
“Drool on your pretty fingers, Koa.”
Se Eun's voice was laid back as I heard a lighter flick open. I follow his instruction, placing my index and middle finger in my mouth— swirling them around my tongue like how he always does. I gag slightly when my fingers accidentally slip into my throat, my tears immediately falling from the shock.
“Mmm… What should I do? My wife is too cute right now, I just want to knock her up already…”
My tears continue to fall as my entire body trembles in fear. Drool coats my fingers and lips— my eyelids fluttering as my heart continues to pound loudly in my ears. The distant moans on Se Eun's end of the call, only caused my body to grow embarrassingly warmer. I start to panic when Se Eun voices out his thoughts; an alarmed sob escaping from my chest.
“Oh? You don't like that idea? Choke on your fingers, Koa. I only listen to a good girl.”
I shakily push my fingers in deeper, gagging heavily from the intrusive sensation. I continue until my head turns lightheaded, until black dots appear in the corners of my vision. I choke on my fingers until I had to physically stop— coughing loudly from the sudden expansion of my lungs.
“Pft- Don't pass out on me now. I haven't even gotten off yet.”
“I-I-I’m sorry…”
“Hm? Are you sure about that? You don't sound very sorry, Koa. Didn't you promise me that you'll comply with my every desire if you could keep your virginity? What a shame, Koa… I thought you were smarter than this. Don't you know that a deal can only work if both sides keep their promises?”
My breath hitches at his words, my entire body trembling in fear. Se Eun's tone was so obviously condescending, my pride bruised from his off-handed comment. I swallow down my saliva before choking out his name.
“...Se Eun-”
“It's fine, though. I like you dumb. My adorable, clueless wife that only knows to spread her legs just for me! Ah, on that note— go ahead and press those fingers of yours into that darling cunt of yours. You want to keep your husband happy, right?”
I take a deep breath to brace myself for my fingers. A sob leaving me as my wet fingers breach my most intimate area. A strangled moan escaping from my lips, my internal temperature running feverish as I cried. I could hear a groan from the speaker, Se Eun jerking off to the sound of my cries. My fingers didn't stop, more of my fluids building up as the sounds in my room only advanced to being lewd. My fingers were completely slimy at this point— wet, suctioning noises no doubt reaching Se Eun's ears.
“Shit. You're already so wet for me… Go faster, Koa. I want to hear you scream.”
My fingers go faster at his words, almost to the point of being painful. A couple of whimpers leak through before I forcefully silence them. I bite onto my lower lip until it bleeds, the metallic taste grounding me to reality. My fingers coincidentally hit a spot that drove a loud moan out of me. My breathing quickens as I feel myself on the brink of release. My tongue lolled out as I started to see stars on the ceiling. My voice is slurred as I chase after my orgasm.
“I-I'm going to cum…”
Se Eun only curses on the phone, seemingly on the edge as well. I could hear the faint sound of a slick substance slapping against something. My mind otherwise clouded with pleasure and more pleasure. A groan snaps me out of my thoughts, my head suddenly clearing up— more sensitive and aware now of every thrust of my fingers.
“Fuck. Koa. I'm about to…”
“S-Se Eun…”
My body trembles as we both come loudly, my hips grinding against my fingers— riding out my high. My eyes were already glazed over when pulling my soaked fingers out. A sloppy, wet sound resonating within the room. I was breathless, my body currently too weak to move a single inch.
“Taste yourself, Koa. Describe it to me.”
I shakily press my fingers against my lips, lapping up at the slightly thick fluid. I was too tired to even be embarrassed by Se Eun's command. My intimate taste covers my lips like lip gloss— my tongue darting out to lick it off me. Without even thinking, the words just fall out of my mouth.
“...Thick. Slimy. …Watery.”
A hum is the only thing I could hear from Se Eun— or maybe it was more? I didn't know, my mind was too muddled to process everything. My breathing continues to be out of rhythm, exhausted both mentally and physically.
I didn't even realize that Se Eun already ended the call, my consciousness just drifting off into a dreamless sleep if I was lucky. Se Eun haunts my every waking moment, yet he managed to find his ways into my dreams as well.
It was my first year in Han Institute, I didn't know anybody yet— Ethan was already pulled away for his sports orientation. I had to navigate my own path to the academic office. The academy was so much larger in person, that I couldn't help but admire every piece of architecture and landscaping my eyes landed on. I was completely distracted, embarrassingly to the point of being lost. I felt relieved when I finally found a student walking in the hallways; my encroaching panic finally let up.
“Hello! Do you know where the office-”
“Tch- Go away. I don't associate myself with dirty whores like you.” My smile immediately drops at the student's words, my mood dampening at his bitterness. The insults were shocking, but I always stick to the golden memo! ‘Sticks and stones may break my bones, but words will never hurt me!’ Ethan was the one to teach me that when we were little, he calls it an old saying from his country! I apparently cried too much because of other people— too much so that Ethan got sick of my tears…
“...Ah… Okay…” Before I could even utter another word, the student walked past me. Purposefully knocking his shoulders into mine to send me against the wall. I held in my tears that were starting to well up in my eyes, it wouldn't be good if I cried at this time. Ethan might feel bad about leaving me alone if he sees that I cried because of a bad interaction. And I didn't want to see Ethan's guilty expression for something that was out of his control…
I decided to take a deep breath, and began my walk again— a bright smile plastered back onto my face. Maybe I'll be able to find a more helpful person this time?
♡♡♡
I met the student again at the sports center— I was out of class early; and I wanted to surprise Ethan with an afternoon together since it's been a while since I've had some free time! I already told Ethan what happened on my first day, and he told me to avoid that person if I ever saw them again. But I couldn't help but notice that he wasn't drinking any water; even after playing basketball on a hot afternoon! My maternal instincts immediately took over.
“Hi! You seemed thirsty!” I walked up to the student that was sitting on the bench, taking out a water bottle from my bag. I've grown used to having water bottles in my bag since Ethan was forgetful sometimes, too. I hold out the water bottle for the student to take. No matter how our first introductions played out, I wasn't going to ignore a dehydrated classmate!
“I'm not.” The student dully replies back, not bothering to look up from his phone. His attitude was slightly rude, but I wasn't swayed enough to go away yet. Especially since I could still hear the student's unsteady breathing— that could be easily fixed with some water in his system! My biology class taught me that!
“It's very hot today, though? Dehydration happens to everyone, you know?” I lightly chastise the student for not caring about his health; don't rich people want to live a long time? Ethan got severely dehydrated once, enough to need the hospital from passing out… That's why I started to carry water bottles on me, and I still couldn't get out of the habit. I place the bottle on the bench— maybe the student will take it once I'm gone?
“...Whatever.” I smile at the student happily once I get his reply. His head turned away from me, likely out of annoyance. His face was red, so he must have been out in the sun for far too long! I was grateful that I haven't kicked my habit of keeping water bottles on me yet. Who knows, maybe I'll gain a friend this way?
I walk away after waving to the student— I almost forgot about Ethan during our brief exchange! Ethan is going to be so happy once I tell him that I'm starting to make a friend! It was a bit pathetic in my eyes. Ethan had so many people around him, and I only had him… I hope that will change soon.
♡♡♡
My third meeting with the student was at the infirmary. Ethan kept on ending up here for some reason, so I decided to volunteer as an aid! There were only benefits to this choice: I got to speak with Ethan more, and I got more points on my college resume, too! The infirmary door slides open, and the greeting dies on my tongue when I see the student's bloodied knuckles.
“Huh- Why are your hands like this?!” I quickly rush up to the student, taking his hands into mine. I was too worried to notice that he didn't slap my hands away, keeping them there as I observed the torn skin. Fighting? In this school? How is that even possible?
“...Are you stalking me? How are you everywhere?” I freeze at the student's guarded tone, not understanding what he was being so defensive for. I snap out of that mindset, it isn't my place to ask that about him. I let go of his hands, a smile on my face as I walked over to the medicine cabinet.
“Nope! I'm just helping out the nurse!” I pipe up happily as I take out some gauze and ointment— making marks on what items I used, and for what I needed it for. I had to admit though, it was strange that I kept on running into the student. It's not like there's anything wrong with that, though! I could always use these times to bond with him!
“Hm… Then I need some bandages-”
“That's very obvious. Name?” I interrupted the student— taking out a binder that held the medical records of the student body. The binder was relatively thin since Han Institute was a private school. I flip it open as I wait for the student to tell me his name.
“Se. Se Eun.” Se Eun… What a nice name. I finally had the name of the student who I wanted to be friends with! I find his name, and place the marked sheet into his file before I start to tend to his wounds. I made sure to be as delicate as possible to not irritate the skin— the nurse was the one that taught me on how to correctly wrap wounds! I can't lie to myself, though… I learned first aid to have an excuse to touch Ethan, too…
Se Eun eventually leaves the infirmary to head off to class. I admired him for that— he could've just stayed in the infirmary since his hands were injured! I waved to him, and he waved back! I really was making progress! My happiness was cut short when Ethan stumbled to the infirmary a few minutes later, in a terrible state. What happened this time?!
♡♡♡ Ethan's POV ♡♡♡
“Koa?!”
I was running now, searching for any sign of her— already out of breath. My legs were screaming at me to take a break already, but I couldn't. Not after what I just heard. Was I that blind? Why didn't she say anything? Did I not seem reliable enough for her to lean on? To help her?
Koa… Am I not someone you trust?
…
I was walking with a group of friends— we were all laughing together about a shared story that happened during practice. One of them even managed to take a video of the coach's wig falling off in the midst of his meltdown! While we were walking, I suddenly overheard a conversation between another group of students who were walking in the opposite direction from us.
At first, I didn't pay them any mind— it was a different story when they suddenly mentioned Koa's name. As any best friend would do, I had to listen to them at this point. It was the right thing to do, after all. It was my sworn duty as a boy best friend to know what rumors were centering around my pretty, girl friend.
I haven't seen Koa in a while, too; she was always busy with something. I swear, one of these days; I’ll have to drag her out of the house to go to the park with me. We'd have a nice conversation together, -enjoying each other's company- feed the ducks with some old, stale bread from the back of the pantry, and maybe even have a picnic together like old times! She'd smile at me, -my index finger discreetly swiping along the rim of the bottle her pink lips touched- and I'd smile at her back. My finger, now stained with a sheer, pink tint. Flowers would adorn our heads as we pluck some stray ones out of the ground. And then… When the moment is right, I’d pull her in-
“Tch. How are people even attracted to Koa?”
Excuse me? I did not just hear what I just heard, right? Koa? Sweet, too clueless for her own good, Koa? Who wouldn't be attracted to her?! She's cute, adorable, pretty, smart… smart when it comes to her grades, anyway. Her little doodles are always so silly, enough to brighten anyone's day. No, I'm not at all biased towards my childhood— that I think about every day and night- Okay. Maybe… I may be just a teensy winsy teeny little biased towards the living goddess that's named Koa, but who wouldn't be?!
“How should I know? The bitch is so weak that a little push from me was enough for her to cry.”
“Pft- Be gentle with her. Everyone here knows that she's Se Eun's plaything. What if she decides to tattle on you?”
“What did I do wrong, though? I only reminded the whore of her place. She's worse than an animal, she shouldn't even be allowed to be in the same room as us.”
…What?
I turn back to my friends, my expression slightly dazed— why would anyone say that about Koa? They were still focused on the video, while I was still pondering on what those girls were saying. They were saying it so loudly, unworried about anyone overhearing their petty gossip. I pause in my steps, my friends eventually noticing my absence.
“Hey, man. Is something wrong? Why did you suddenly just stop?”
One of them, Min-woo, stops to question me. I wasn't sure why I stopped, as well. My mind suddenly invaded with unwelcome thoughts of Koa in less than desirable positions. For some reason, I felt the need to dig deeper into this. My gut was telling me that there was something wrong— that I was missing something very important right now.
“...What do you guys hear about Koa?”
“Who?”
My eyes widened at Min-woo's words, surprised by his confused expression. I thought I already introduced Koa to them? Did they already forget her? No… She was at our practice just a few days ago. …Right? She was there, smiling at me happily as I scored another goal in the practice round. She was there… then Se Eun suddenly arrived. I remembered being so distracted with how close they were to each other— unable to focus afterwards.
Koa's body seemed to be more stiff too; I almost threw the ball on the bastard's face in a flash of rage. I hated him, I've hated Se Eun since he was introduced to me by Koa. He was always too close to her, their bodies practically pressing together. Koa would shrink back from him, but Se Eun never seemed to get the message. He violates Koa's boundaries, boundaries that are there for a reason.
“Koa- …Who is this?” I was so happy when Koa told me that she would walk me home from practice. My eyes brighten up when I finally see her figure, ignoring my teammates’ snickers. Psh- They're just jealous that they don't have a pretty best friend to talk to. I stop in my rapid steps when I notice another person sitting with Koa by the shade.
My heart stung a bit when I saw how close they were, a bitter taste on my tongue. I was… I was jealous; fearful of my spot being taken. It's been a while since I've seen Koa, and she's already made a friend! Koa's been steadily changing from the crybaby she was when we were kids; she didn't need my protection anymore.
She's started to open up to more people— finally coming out of her welded shell. I'll admit that I may have been a bit hesitant on letting go of Koa at the very beginning, but I don't regret it. Koa deserves to be free; and it should be a well-known fact that she looks the most beautiful when she's able to soar.
“Ethan! Come meet my new friend!” Koa's pretty eyes sparkle when she notices me, a sweet blush on her cheeks. I shuffle my feet towards the duo… No. Not a duo, that's too much for my saintly, idealistic, holy mindset -that's been the one reason for why I haven't grabbed Koa for myself, yet- to handle! Although… The way my fists were clenched until my knuckles turned white from the grip… that was telling a different story.
“...” The bastard just stays on his phone, too, not even bothering to look up from it. Was this really supposed to be my competition?! The title of best friend was definitely going to stay mine— but the way he had his pinkie finger nearly poking at Koa's? Red filled my vision when I noticed his smug expression. If Koa wasn't here; I would've bitch slapped him, just for the sheer audacity.
“Haha- He doesn't like to talk much… Meet Se Eun!” Oh, Koa… innocent, naive, Koa. There was no way in hell that Se Eun was good news. How was I going to convince Koa to drop him? My resolve to tear her away from Se Eun immediately wavers when she smiles at me so cheerfully. She just looked so proud of herself… Who was I to break it?
“Oh, yes! And he wants to walk with us, too!”
…Motherfucker-
I take a deep breath— thinking that maybe, they just forgot her name. It happens sometimes! I, myself, have had my own fair share of forgotten names. I needed to constantly remind myself that Koa wasn't the center of everyone's universe; even if she definitely should be-
“Koa. The girl who's almost always at practice. You know: straight, black hair, pretty yellow eyes, always writing in a book-”
“Ah! You mean Puppy?”
I resist the urge to strangle Min-woo who had just called Koa by such a degrading name. Koa was definitely cuter than a puppy— but I didn't go around calling her that, now did I? I was about to correct him before one particular comment from another friend of mine, Jeong, caused me to completely lose it.
“I heard everyone wants a piece of that a-”
I didn't even let Jeong finish his sentence before I grabbed him by the collar of his shirt— slamming his back against the wall. I could hear shouts for me to let go of the perverted asshole as I raised him up. My teeth were grinding themselves, my eyes narrowing at him in anger. I could barely hear my teammates practically screaming in my ear; too caught up in my own rage to even think right now.
“Oi! Ethan! What the hell?!”
“Let go of Jeong, man! I think you're choking him right now!”
“We can talk about this, Ethan! You can't just throw hands like that!”
I continue to keep Jeong on his toes, furious for Koa's sake since I knew that she would just brush it off. No. Koa doesn't deserve to be disrespected like this— Koa shouldn't have to be listening to this kind of shit. Everyone wants a piece of her? What is she? Property? My girl friend was human; an individual person who has her own autonomy, her own life.
Koa belongs here, Koa has proven herself to be their equal, time and time again, through her achievements. But the way all of these people were talking about her… They made it sound like she was nothing but an ownerless stray— lessening her worth to being dirt-cheap. They spoke like she wasn't meant for anything more, when she's meant for everything.
“Say that again. I fucking dare you.”
I hiss at Jeong, my grip on his collar tightening to an unbelievable extent. The nerve to make such a derogatory, perverted comment— did Jeong never have a mother who taught him to be respectful to women? If not, then I would happily volunteer myself to be the one that beats the lesson into him. Until the memory is permanently scarred onto his pea-sized brain.
“S-say what? …What the hell- Is this about Puppy?! It's not just me who says that! It's not like we have a chance-”
“Explain.”
I let go of Jeong before he tells me about Koa's predicament— every single incident that I have somehow never noticed. The cruel pranks pulled on her, the physical harassment, the bullying… I stagger back from Jeong, my face paling when I think about what Koa had to suffer through, alone. My nails were digging into my palms; almost to the point of nearly piercing through the calloused skin. I couldn't believe it. What right did I have, to call myself her best friend, when I didn't even know about the torture she has to go through, everyday? I felt like a failure, like an idiot.
Koa… Why didn't you say anything..?
“There's also all that shit with Se-”
I didn't even hear his last words, my legs already moving to search for Koa. All I could think was that my helpless Koa -infamous for staying silent- stayed silent. My sweet Koa who always just smiled through everything, no matter how much it hurt— even if it started to bleed through her clothing, her pain, so obvious. Koa, who could never speak out for herself, unable to ever find the courage to ask for help. …Koa… the one I neglected because I blindly believed in her words. I believed my best friend, who is known to tell lies that only wound her.
…I’m such a fool in love.
“Koa?! Koa! Where the hell are you?!”
I ran through the hallways, not giving a single damn about the hall monitor's warnings about running indoors. I needed to see Koa; I needed to know, by how much, did I really fail her. …By how much I failed us.
Have I really been that detached from Koa? I remember a time when I would know her entire schedule by heart— never having to search this hard for even a glimpse of her hair. Only because we were practically attached to the hip; the both of us clinging onto each other, like a lifeline, during the most miserable time of our lives. Now… Now I can see just how far Koa has really drifted away from me. I can now see that we weren't as close as we were in the past. Koa was able to keep such secrets from me because I didn't pry, like before— because I didn't stay, like before.
“Koa!”
“...Ethan?”
My distress finally lifts when I hear her melodic voice; after everything that happened— it felt like it's been years since we've last seen each other. Since I've been able to talk to Koa, since I've been able to look at her. I breathe a sigh in relief, finally finding her after running all around the campus like a madman. I was sweating heavily, my breathing erratic as I greedily sucked in as much air as I physically could. My limbs felt like they were on fire at this point, but it was only through sheer will and adrenaline— that I was able to move myself closer to Koa.
“Koa! Thank God, I've heard about-”
…Oh.
So that's how it was… I freeze in my steps when I finally see Koa's current state, my eyes widening in horror at the sight. Koa was drenched, from head to toe in some kind of opaque liquid— it smelled like milk. The worst part wasn't that she smelled like milk now… No. The worst part was the way her shirt clung to her skin; the way her white blouse exposed her blemished skin to everyone. My heart twisted from the medley of wounds she had: green and purple bruises, dark red teeth marks… burns. Cigarette burns.
I wanted to cry, I wanted to punch the wall until my knuckles turned bloody. I wanted to hurt myself as if the act would take all of Koa's pain away. I wanted to throw up everything in my stomach when Koa only smiled at me— the same smile that I knew all too well, that held years of pain in it. The same smile that I both adore and hate, a plethora of memories filled it.
Don't smile. How can you even smile right now? You don't have to be strong, Koa. Just lean on me for once. …Please… I’m begging you. Don't smile at me when you're like this.
“Ethan… I thought you were busy today?”
I could listen to her voice for ages— I didn't even think that there was a single way for me to possibly get tired of her. Koa could be speaking to me in hieroglyphics, and I'd still nod along to anything she said. Koa was a precious person to me, but that's also why it hurts me more to see her so damaged. Koa was an untouchable being in my eyes; seemingly unstained from reality when she was just as tainted.
Appearing as a savior, and leaving as a martyr— that's the usual ending for someone with Koa's kindness. Sometimes… Sometimes I forget that she knows far more than she lets on. That she's seen, first-hand with me, just how much humanity tends to turn to sin in a hopeless situation.
“Koa…”
I croak out, my body trembling as I slowly walk up to Koa. I had to, both mentally and physically, stop myself from grabbing Koa by the shoulders. My tears welled up in my eyes, our eyes locked together— an inexplicable sorrow replacing what was left of my fading frustration. My heart was loudly pounding into my eardrums; I could clearly hear the blood flow cycling through my head.
“E-E-Ethan?!”
I could almost see Koa's panicked expression as I collapsed onto my knees; my head lowered in shame. Tears streamed down my face as I cried. Why was I so unaware? Would it have even made a difference if I knew about it? Was I that useless? I've been too confident— too sure of my ability to protect Koa, when I've already failed in the very thing I constantly boast about. What white knight? I was nothing more than a fool; a fool who was stupid enough to believe that he was worth something more— just because of some shiny medals he luckily won.
“Oh god- E-Ethan! What's wrong?! Are y-you hurt-?”
“Look at yourself first, Koa.”
I finally raise my head up, my red-rimmed eyes matching Koa's current ones. Ah… She's been crying again. I notice how she flinches at my comment, her head hanging low for some reason. Why? Was she ashamed?
No… Koa… Keep your head lifted up. Why is it lowered? You're not the one who needs to be humbled.
“...Ethan-”
“Can't you feel it? God, Koa. Some of these must have even bled-”
I couldn't even finish my words, my throat immediately stuck when I watched Koa starting to tear up. I watched as her eyes turned glassy once more— Koa just looked so fragile at the moment, like she was a vase that would shatter if it was dropped one last time. It was hard to imagine anyone handling Koa roughly; she was too delicate to be pushed around like that. And yet she suffered through so much more…
“Let me explain-”
“Who did this to you?”
I don't let Koa speak, I already knew what kind of excuses she would pull out of her ass. I've been with her, stayed by her side for long enough— to know about her self-sacrificing personality towards other people. I've scolded her, for this, countless times; I even yelled at her! Well… We were both eight at the time— but it still counts! Even if I never did it again after it took me literal hours to get Koa to stop crying; I swear, she can never run out of tears for some reason. She even made me cry with her because of the stress she put on my little eight-year-old brain!
Koa never seemed to learn her lesson: blindly trustful and kind to the people who shouldn't even be allowed to breathe in the same air as her. I bit so many ankles -when we were kids- because assholes have to exist— I was a feral child, growing up.
“W-what do you mean-”
“Koa... I'm begging you here. Y-you need help. It doesn't have to be from me, but fuck-! You have to tell someone.”
My words tasted bitter on my tongue, the thought of Koa going to someone else… That made me want to grind down on my teeth. I wanted Koa to look for me first if she's ever troubled by anything. I'd drop everything for her— whatever she wanted: a shoulder to cry on, a person who will listen to her as she vents, someone to tend to her injuries.
Heck‐! I'd still drop everything if she just wanted to sleep on my lap. Koa has been my priority for practically my whole, conscious life by now— and that part will never change.
I wasn't selfish, but I also wasn't selfless. Even if I hated it, I'd still let Koa go to someone else for help— but it didn't mean that I had to like it. My tears continued to fall as I slowly tugged on the hem of Koa's blazer. I'd hate it, but Koa would be safe, then. She'd be safe… just not with me.
Koa was just silent, I could tell that her mask was slipping. I needed her to be vulnerable with someone— anyone. Her tears have long since come out like mine; her entire body trembling as she collapses onto her knees as well. She hesitantly looked me in the eye, her next words making me snap.
“I'm fine-”
“Bullshit!”
“Ethan-”
“Look at yourself! You look like a mess!”
Koa was a mess— I could now see her wounds more closely, now that she was kneeling next to me. My stomach churned uncomfortably at what I painfully observed: hickeys littered across her neck and chest, purple marks around Koa's throat, -as if someone strangled her until she passed out- there were multiple, large green and purple regions on her stomach, and the sides of her torso— like she was kicked until she had to throw up. …Small, circular burns could be seen, too…
I even identified the current state of Koa's face: worn off foundation showed hints of a black eye slowly healing, her once pink lips, now a darker purple than usual, -smooth lips now cracked and ripped to practical shreds- and her tears washed away the concealer that carefully hid her eye bags.
My fingers curl into tight fists— Koa's been hurt like this? Why? Why didn't she tell me? Why didn't she come to me when she first got assaulted? When she first got strangled? When she first got burned? …Why didn't she say anything?
WHY? WHY? WHY? WHY? WHY?!
“But-”
“How far did they go, Koa? Was it more than one person? For god's sake, Koa- Why won't you tell me anything?! Tell me so I can beat their ass for you! You can't possibly be trying to defend them right now-”
“Ethan!”
I get cut off by Koa; I get cut off by Koa yelling at me. She yelled at me. She yelled at me because I wanted to defend her honor, her pride. I want to help Koa… So why does she have to keep shutting me out?
…Why?
Koa doesn't say anything more, her tears saying enough to me. Koa didn't want me to do anything— she didn't want me to help. Koa… Koa didn't want me.
It took me a moment to realize my blood dripping onto the marble flooring. I didn't even care that we were in the middle of the hallways; I didn't care that everyone was watching us now. I cared about Koa, I could only think about Koa at the moment. My tears stained my cheeks as I begged her to tell me. A name, a place- Fuck! I would even take a hair color at this point!
“Koa- Please- Just tell me-”
“Koa.”
A voice interrupts me, a voice that was deeper than Koa's own choked-up one. It was a voice that I was painfully familiar with— the smug tone, the barely concealed malice in his words. Se Eun.
I was about to yell at him to leave, but then I noticed how Koa started acting. Her breathing turned irregular; her entire body, now trembling in fear… Him? It was him, then? It was Se Eun?! I knew that he was a terrible person from the start— only proven to be correct when he joined into the weekly beatings between me and the wannabe gangsters at this damn school. I should've said something to Koa, but she just looked so happy with him… Delighted with her first friend in this hellhole.
…Fuck. I'm a hypocrite.
“Se Eun!”
I scream out in anger, red flooding my vision. I reacted in the only way I could. I react violently, volatile to every single thing that Se Eun does: whether he moves a single inch closer, or he decides to spill his bullshit out. I get up from the floor, immediately grabbing him by the collar of his shirt. The monster only looks past me, staring at Koa instead. That only irritated me more— I wasn't going to let him hurt Koa any more than he already did. No. It won't happen again.
“You don't have the fucking right to look at her anymore.”
I hissed at him, roughly slamming Se Eun's back against the wall. A sick glee crashing over me before I stomped it out. No… This one was for Koa. This was about Koa's pride, not mine.
The bastard only winces in pain before his eyes finally meet mine. Those same, soulless pitch-black eyes causing my skin to crawl. Was this guy seriously the so-called ‘hottest’ person on campus right now? The people here must be blind if this creep show was considered to be popular. In my neighborhood, fuckers like him would end up in a ditch somewhere.
“Koa. Come here.”
My teeth just grind at Se Eun's audacity; he was acting as if nothing was happening. He ignored my words, yet he kept his eye-contact with me. The demon was taunting me, he was silently telling me that I didn't stand a chance against him. My fists only tighten around his collar, one wrong move away from punching the smirk off his disgusting face.
“Like hell she would-”
The words die on my tongue when I see that Koa did exactly that. I could only watch as Koa shakily stood up from the floor. I gaped when I saw Koa walking up to us, her body language clearly telling me that she didn't want to be doing this at all. Her face was paler than usual, her legs looked a step away from collapsing on themselves.
I let go of Se Eun's collar, turning my full attention towards Koa, I needed to know why. Why was she doing this? Was she getting threatened? Coerced? There was no way that any of this was voluntary, her glassy eyes showing off her reluctance.
I block Koa's way, standing between her and Se Eun— she looks at me with an expression that conveys nothing less than pure, unfiltered misery. I stare at her, my own eyes mirroring Koa's depressed ones. The beautiful sun-lit amber that I've grown used to, have all but turned into a dull, rusted copper. Beautiful… but in a gloomy statement— like it was something to be mourning.
I slowly made a move, -letting Koa see where my hands were, enough time for her to move back- grabbing at the sleeve of her blazer. My voice sounded pathetic at this point, but I didn't care. I just wanted to let Koa know that she didn't have to do this, that she will always have me by her side.
“Koa… Please don't…”
“Koa.”
Se Eun had to ruin the moment with his big mouth; his voice was basically demanding for Koa. It was disrespectful and humiliating, the way he called for her as if she were a dog. Was he the reason for Koa's nickname? I wouldn’t even be surprised at this point. My jaw clenches in annoyance, turning my head to glare at the nerve of this bitch. I tried to convince Koa again, but Se Eun seemed to scare her too much…
I had no chance.
Koa pulled her sleeve out of my loose grip— a part of me shattering beyond repair once I was gripping onto nothing but air. Koa goes around me; I didn't even have the energy to get angry when Se Eun's arm instantly wraps itself around her waist. Koa hates being touched, yet Se Eun never seemed to care… I wanted to beg Koa to stay, but Koa's next words kept my mouth tightly shut.
“...We'll talk later, Ethan.”
…She didn't even look back at me when she said it. Se Eun pulled her along with him, -far too roughly- but I didn't detect her head moving a single inch back in my direction. I was speechless, my hand dumbly reaching out for Koa, even if her figure was nowhere to be found.
Only one word was uttered— the name of the girl who's been by my side for ages. The girl that I love with my entire soul, and the girl that I don't deserve. My tears fall again, my palms still bloody as I continue to dig into the fresh wounds. My head was lowered in shame; shame that was well deserved for my ignorance— and for being too late.
“...Koa.”
♡♡♡ Se Eun's POV ♡♡♡
I wanted to scream when someone stopped Koa in the middle of the hallways. The piece of shit came up to my wife, confessing to her, while I was standing right there. I internally sneered at the disgustingly gaudy letter: obnoxious, golden hearts scattered throughout it, and a messy handwriting that, I was somehow able to determine, included Koa's name. The absolute gall of this dunce— writing my wife's blessed name in such a mediocre print? I'd destroy him; just because of such a defilement.
The bastard was fucking lucky that Koa rejected him, or else I wouldn't have hesitated to throw his cold, rotten body off a bridge. He did not deserve to receive the love of my life's gentle words, almost immediately shaking her head at his request. I wanted nothing more than to dig out the eyes that dared to gaze upon my wife's— those same eyes that tainted Koa with his filth.
The rat didn't even have the chance to convince Koa otherwise; not while I was angrily glaring from behind her. It was honestly annoying that such low-ranking scum had the fucking balls to believe that they had a chance with the angelic being that, fortunately, made her way into my dull life.
“Koa. Why did you reject him?” I asked her curiously once we continued in our walk— the vermin finally scurrying away at my silent threat. He obviously wouldn't be as good as me, but a guy like him is the typical dream for girls with Koa's status. So why would she refuse what may be her one chance to get out of poverty?
Koa only hums, her feet not stopping at all as her hands go behind her back. She turns to me, looking only at me for the moment. My breath embarrassingly hitching at her soft look— I blushed as if I didn't spend my free time, constantly in whores who would kneel at my command. I had to discreetly adjust my trousers when my love's back arched forward, cutely tilting her head to one side. I could be directly staring into a woman's bare pussy right now— and my lovely wife's present, endearing posture would still arouse me more.
I was infatuated with Koa… and I've long since realized that I wanted those bright, starry amber eyes to never stray away from being only mine. No matter who or what, tries to get in my way; I'll eliminate every other choice she has, until I'm the only option left. I didn't want to witness such a grotesque confession again, so I needed to start marking my territory…
“Why wouldn't I? I don't like him.” My wife's words snapped me out of my deliberations, I had to force myself to hold in a laugh. Pft- Only Koa would think so naively— did she not think about the benefits to using the deep pockets of that pest? My clueless wife really was too good for this world if that's what her answer was. …Ergo, I should make sure to lock her up real tight when the time comes.
The idea of Koa being only mine, it made me hot inside. A manic gleam flashing in my eyes, before it left as quickly as it came. I continued to muse at her innocent words, listening to her nonsensical rambling as we walked through the now empty corridors. My wife was just so lovely~
“Work harder, dog.”
I snap at Koa coldly, pulling onto the leather belt around her neck. My lack of mercy evokes a pained gasp from Koa— as her nose is pressed against my clothed groin. A shudder runs throughout my entire body, groaning while grinding onto her face. My head, thrown back as I drove her face into my trousers— the abrupt tug of Koa's makeshift collar causing her throat to strain against the leather.
I breathe out an annoyed sigh, my teeth still grinding at the memory of seeing her and that impoverished bastard together. It seems that I've grown lax due to her good behavior; Koa needed to remember who was really in charge here— because it certainly isn't her. I can only be so patient with a rebellious wife, after all.
Koa's lips part open, but not because she was finally putting that fucking mouth to use. No. She decided to open up her good-for-nothing mouth, to say a bitch-ass excuse, which would simply serve to irritate me further.
“I-I'm s-s-sorry, Se-”
“Don't. You already know what I want from you.”
I crudely interrupt Koa's pathetic stammering; her sniffles doing nothing but exciting me more. She only whimpered farther when I yanked onto my leather belt again. I could feel myself hardening already, painfully straining against the trousers’ fabric as Koa falls on top of it. I lean back from upon my seat as I spread my legs— waiting for my love to finally get to work. Koa's pretty lips were trembling as her hands fumbled with the zipper. It was fucking hilarious to see her so tense.
I grin at her pitiful attempts, my cheeks flushed at the sight of my wife kneeling in front of me. I had to chuckle as I pulled Koa towards me again— forcing her to fall face-first into my lap. I click my tongue at Koa, my voice adopting a mocking tone, while my hand reaches for her chin.
“Ah, ah, ah~ I don't think dogs use their paws…”
I coo at her as I force my lovely puppy to lean into me more— grabbing onto my love's face to pull her up higher. Her lovely tears start to fall again as I push my thumb into the corner of her mouth. My thumb lightly tapped against Koa's cute, little teeth as I mercilessly belittled her.
“Use your mouth, dog. Are you that dumb?”
My thumb swirls around her tongue; her tears dripping onto my fingers. I could only smile at my idiotic wife's adorable expression, wanting to kiss all her tears away— lapping up the salty liquid that stained her cheeks. Koa looked the most beautiful when she was below me, always within my grasp at all times.
My little pet whimpers as I take my thumb out of her mouth— smearing her drool all across her cheek. My cheeks weren't the only ones that were red at this point; the love of my life's cheeks were also bright with an alluring redness to them. They made me want to paint her rear in that same, beautiful color. Her songs of pain, music to my ears— pretty reds and purples blossomed on my precious wife's skin.
Our eyes lock together; my wife's glassy eyes taking a moment before dropping from mine. My smirk just grows as the scared puppy obediently lowers her head towards my trousers’ zipper. My wife's pretty knuckles were noticeably pale from clenching her fists far too tightly— adorably trembling in front of me so deliciously. I couldn't help myself at all. Is it that terrible to desire my sweet pet if her body intensely shakes that fucking much in my presence? As though I'm preparing to devour her entirety, bones and all?
A satisfied groan leaves me as I hear the clinking of my wife's teeth against the silver. Fuck, why did she have to be so adorable? The way she practically vibrated between my legs made me want to just bend her over and- …In summary, my wife was just too pretty to keep my hands to myself.
…
“Do you know what you did wrong now, my love~?”
My wife just moans as I rub myself against her wet folds; I could even slide myself in, without her even knowing, at this point. She kept on protesting against me, yet she always dripped down my fingers -like a fucking slut- whenever I played with her. I could only deduce -from her demeanor- that my lovely wife wanted this too— she was just too shy for her own good.
“Hic- I-I'm s-so-RRY!”
I slap her clit carelessly, reveling in the sound of her panicked breaths and hiccups that littered her sobs. My wife was such a darling, always having the ability to turn me on— no matter what type of shit she does. Yes… her tears really were cute. They always taste so addictively salty whenever I lap them up from my wife's cheeks; her body always tensing from what should be surprise. She really was too fucking cute for her own good. I couldn't wait until she would be only mine to talk to, to touch… to see.
“Hmm? Do you even know how you angered me?”
I grab onto a fistful of my wife's pretty hair, groaning with delight when I hear such pathetic whimpers coming from her. A chuckle leaves from me as her teary eyes meet mine; every bit of me wanting to see more and more of that pretty expression. My tone was cold, despite my face having an almost feverish temperature to it.
“...Who knows? Maybe you're just praying that I would be satisfied by those delectable lips of yours? Those same lips that do nothing but lie to their own master? You can be such a comedian sometimes, my love~ Did you really think that I, Se Eun, would be so desperate for you? Desperate to the point of wanting, no, craving your half-assed apologies?”
“N-no- I'm sorry- I-I'm so-”
“Then why are you sorry, Koa? Why don't you define what exactly you're fucking apologizing for?”
I lean my body closer to her, feeling her limbs twitch from underneath me. My wife was just lying on the desk: her skirt pulled up to her waist, blouse unbuttoned, underwear discarded, and her bra pushed up to reveal her modest breast. It was as if she wanted to be fucked by me with how cute she always acts. I moved my face nearer, until I could see how my pretty wife's eyelashes fluttered as she cried. My lips meet my wife's lips in a sweet manner— biting onto the soft flesh until I could taste bitter iron on my tongue.
My tongue shoves itself into my wife's cute mouth, our saliva mixing until it’s impossible to separate them from each other. Like how our taste melded together, I wanted Koa to be mixed into me— to the point of where she would be fucking nothing without me. As I recklessly bite, lick, and devour my wife's lips; certain thoughts start to swirl inside my head. Thoughts of wanting Koa to be only mine, only smiling at me, only looking at me.
Love me, Koa. You won't ever need anyone else but me. For my name is Se Eun, and I promise to always love you, both in this life and the next… Till not even death will do us part.
“I-I-”
I don't let Koa continue, wanting her mouth all to myself— nothing but my tongue to keep her company. I even felt jealous of the shitty words that were spoken into existence by her pretty, pink lips. I only watched as my wife's eyes flickered between: lust, fear, and confusion; swallowing her pitiful whimpers when I bite just a bit too hard.
“I-I… C-close to E-Ethan-”
A loud slap rings across the room; a bright red mark found on my wife's face for daring to utter another shitty man's name in front of her husband— her lover. My eyes, dark as I grabbed onto her face; not at all gentle in the manner, with how I jerked her chin up to me. Koa’s lips just twist into such an adorable grimace as I purposefully apply even more pressure onto her increasingly sore cheek— her tears only falling more because the bruise I aggravated.
“Did you have permission to say another man's name, dog?”
I hiss out in a frigid tone, keeping a tight grip on my wife's face. My breath quickened as I felt my anger slowly growing into a volatile storm— frustrated by the memory of seeing her and that motherfucker together. I only felt satisfaction when I saw her tears falling from the pain. There was no remorse coming from me; not a single hint of guilt found on my face while glaring at my wife's glossy eyes— only raw, unadulterated rage. How dare she? How dare she fucking talk to another person without my explicit permission?
My lovely wife… Let's play a little game together~
“N-no-”
“Then continue.”
“I-I talked to a-another person-”
“And who was this other person?”
My disobedient wife's lips snap shut at my question; her eyes widening once she finally realizes what her punishment will be. A smug smile appears on my face as a distressed expression appears on my wife's. Laughter builds up in my chest when she shakily reaches her hand up to my shirt— missing me by a few centimeters.
“P-please…”
Her voice takes on a desperate tone, doing nothing but making me want her more. What my wife thought would be enough to dissuade me… only served to increase my already excessive excitement. Really. She had to stop being so adorable all the fucking time— I'm honestly afraid of dying early with how insatiable I am when it comes down to my cute as fuck wife. I still had an overly-excessive grip on her pretty face— still close enough to have a clear idea of her current scent: a mixture between toasted cinnamon and a shitty confectionery sweet. It was a cheapass scent that I would only enjoy from my wife's pretty skin; skin that I have thoroughly marked as fucking mine, and only mine.
“Name.”
“S-Se Eun-”
“Name.”
“I-I-”
“Don't make me repeat myself a third time, dog.”
You love that name, right? Then I'll make sure to overwrite those “pure” memories of yours— till nothing but pain and sorrow remain… I'll ensure that you're never able to be comforted by the mention of HIS name again.
I'll hurt you so fucking badly with HIS name, because only my name should give you even the smallest bit of respite you desire. …I'll be your safe place, Koa; and the reason for it, too.
I watch as my wife silently sobs; her words a jumbled mess of what I can easily imagine to be pleadings for mercy. Mercy that I won't be giving her— mercy that she doesn't fucking deserve. I felt heated by the way she shook in my grip; every single inch of her making my mouth water.
“S-Se Eun…”
“I wasn't mad at myself, Koa.”
My dull eyes stay on my wife's face, unmoved by her tears— a smile, frozen on my lips. The dog finally stops whimpering when my grip eases from her chin. But her cries only get louder when my hand trails down to her neck; a warning squeeze, placed onto her throat to remind my pretty dog of her place now.
I could see the very moment when the fight eventually left my wife, her pretty eyes turning as dull as mine. Such a pretty copper suited her— far better than a cheap amber that held no value in the real world. My smile only widens at the sight as I start to squeeze onto my wife’s throat harder; I absolutely loved how she didn’t try to resist this time, too tired to do anything at all.
“Tell me, Koa.”
“...Ethan.”
The way she said the bastard’s name made me want to laugh right then and there— so hopeful, yet defeated at the same time. My grip on my wife’s cute throat starts to leave blue marks as the rhythm in her chest starts to stagger. I didn’t care if she couldn’t breathe, though; I knew when to stop before my wife passed out. We’ve had plenty of practice, after all.
I lean my lips closer to my wife’s ear, as I quietly whisper into her ear; my voice soft as if I was about to tell her a deeply guarded family secret. My other hand starts to lovingly stroke my wife’s cheek, like how a person would do to a dog— a cruel glint in my eyes. One hand was still busy choking her, while the other was being so gentle with her face; a drastic parallel that perfectly mirrored the love I had for my beautiful pet.
“What did I say about another man’s name coming out of your pretty mouth, again?”
OH MY GOD- THIS TOOK TOO LONG- (WHY DO I DO THIS TO MYSELF??? TT)
THIS WILL BE A TEN CHAPTER SERIES THAT WILL BE POSTED INCONSISTENTLY. NOTE. INCONSISTENTLY. PLEASE PLEASE PLEASE GIVE ME FEEDBACK- I YEARN FOR ACKNOWLEDGWMENT AND COMMENTS. (don't be mean though. I cry easily.) (。･´д`･。)
Ack- I gotta tag now-
#toxic love#smut#angst#fluff#healthy love#love triangle#yandere#hurt/comfort#im not lying tho writers block got me going:#AHHHHHHHHHHHHHHH#send help#author is not mentally stable if they can write this stuff.#the call is coming from inside the house#tw abuse#lots of tws#minors dni#ill add tags later#slow burn#yandere male oc#writing#a03 fanfic
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A Time's Mind
author:
Widow_Spyder
summary:
Gen shut off the TV with a huff, angrily throwing the remote onto the floor before burying his head into the couch cushion and letting himself go.
Oh yes indeed, everyone was having the time of their lives, back in a newly minted world with technology and high rises and working water pumps. Everyone except for one. Because of those 367 days since they saved humanity. Gen had been alone for 322 of them.
#Dr. STONE (Anime)#Dr. STONE (Manga)#Asagiri Gen/Ishigami Senkuu#Minor or Background Relationship(s)#Ogawa Yuzuriha/Ooki Taiju#Asagiri Gen#Ishigami Senkuu#Ooki Taiju#Ogawa Yuzuriha#Kohaku (Dr. STONE)#Suika (Dr. STONE)#Chrome (Dr. STONE)#basically everyone they know#Everyone is mentioned - Character#or we see them#Angst#Angst with a Happy Ending#Heavy Angst#Hurt/Comfort#Major Illness#Fluff and Angst#Happy Ending#Eventual Happy Ending#Eventual Relationships#Modern Era#takes place after everything#Canon Continuation#Other Additional Tags to Be Added#Intrusive Thoughts#Terminal Illnesses
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I wanna be yours
Pairing: Bangchan x fem!reader
Summary: it was all a game to him, until all he could think about was you. He wanted to have all of you. Ruin all of you. Love all of you.
Or, the one where Chan is a cocky asshole who's going out with you just for fun and ends up falling in love.
Slightly inspired in the movie 10 things I hate about you.
Genres: angst, smut, fluff
Words count: 10,991
Masterlist
This content is +18 ONLY, minors do NOT interact!
Warnings: Corruption kink(kinda), dry humping, fingering, blowjob, loss of virginity, unprotected sex, pet names(princess, baby), Chan is cocky as fuck(and I'm here for it, stan cocky Bangchan), reader gets kinda insecure close to the end(let me know if I missed something)
A/N: should I be answering my requests or updating my series? Yes, did I spend too much time in a super long self indulgent oneshot? I did. It was supposed to be just smut with corruption kink 😭 turns out I can't write the porn without the plot.
It all started as a game for him. He just didn't guess how much you would mess with his head.
Bang Chan doesn't care much about college, with a promising career in music, he's just attending classes so his parents won't nag him too much.
That means he's bored all the time.
So when Jeongin, his youngest friend, begged him to win his girlfriend's sister over and date her for a bit, he almost accepted right away, yearning for some fun. But he didn't, not before knowing who you were.
That's how he ended up here, trying to find you in the middle of communication class. He didn't need to look too much, from Jeongin’s description, he could find you in the blink of an eye.
“A pretty girl, probably wearing black or some neutral color and she'll probably be in a corner. She's very shy, when you speak to her don't be too straightforward, you may scare her”
The way Jeongin described you didn't show any ill intent and he was always a good guy, that's why Chan considered accepting his offer in the first place. He must have his reasons for almost kneeling in front of his friend, asking for him to date you.
Chan sits behind you, observing every movement you make. You're indeed pretty and you really are shy. He notices how you want to raise your hand every time the professor asks a question, but you always hesitate and someone speaks over you. Every time you try to speak, some rude person cuts you and instead of getting mad, your face turns red and you shrink in your seat, trying to make yourself even more invisible.
There's something about you, Chan can't tell what it is, but it's something amusing about how you behave. Someone like you could have every guy in this university wrapped around your little finger and every girl wanting to be your friend.
As soon as the class ends, Chan sends a text to Jeongin, telling him he will do it. He doesn't waste time, waiting for everyone to get out of the classroom while you're still collecting your things.
“Hey”, he says out of nowhere, making you jump and look at him with huge doe eyes. “I'm sorry, I didn't mean to scare you”.
He kinda did want that, though, curious to see how you would react, he thought maybe you would raise your voice and curse him, but you reacted as calmly as possible.
“It's okay”, you mumble.
You keep organizing your things, trying to ignore his presence.
“So, I wanted to ask if you can let me borrow your notes”, he asks, making puppy eyes.
You turn back to him and Chan can almost see the gears turning inside your head.
“Why does he want my notes if he just attended the same class?” It's written all over your face.
“I pulled an all nighter studying for another class and kind of dozed off earlier”, he lies, smiling sheepishly while scratching the back of his neck.
You stare at him for a bit, pondering if you should say yes, actually, let's be real: can you even say no?
This is Bang Chan, handsome and popular, everyone knows him and the other two guys from 3racha. The last you heard, he didn't care much about classes since he's already progressing in his music career so you still don't understand why he wants to borrow your notes.
“Yeah, okay”, you nod, deciding to agree so this conversation can be over soon. You pull your notebook out of your bag and hand it to him. “Just make sure to give it back by next class”
“Sure, thanks”, he gives you a big bright smile that makes you gulp while staring at him, just a few minutes in his presence and you already know something very important: this man is dangerous.
You look around awkwardly, not knowing what Chan wants more. He's just standing there, staring at you.
“I'll get going then”, you sigh, feeling exhausted by this whole interaction.
You turn around, walking to the door, leaving Chan there, dumbstruck. Jeongin was right, you have no social skills, but you're much more entertaining than he made you out to be.
—
You're having lunch with Yuna, your sister, and Jeongin, her boyfriend, in the cafeteria. You like spending time with them, they are probably the only people you feel comfortable around in this university.
You met Jeongin three months ago. Your sister came home giggling like a child on Christmas, sat on your bed and told you she got a boyfriend.
You ran to your door, closing it after checking that your parents weren't around. There's only one rule in the house: your younger sister must not date before you do.
Your parents are not conservative or anything like that, they just had you two later than other parents, so they are very overprotective. You don't know exactly the reason why they set this rule, maybe it's because they are sure you're never going to date.
Yuna is your best friend, she was a sickly child so all those interactions and fights that normal sisters have, you didn't. You spent most of her childhood and a huge part of yours by her side in the hospital. Fortunately, she was able to go back to a normal life by the time she was becoming a teenager, she was always a social butterfly even in the hospital everyone loved her.
You always thought it was unfair that she had to wait to have a boyfriend simply because you are not interesting enough or can't even hold a conversation properly without stuttering, but there was nothing you could do about it. You even tried arguing with your parents about it but it always ended with them telling you to forget about it.
You see Jeongin waving to someone, something is off, they never invite anyone to eat with them. A tray is settled by your side and you look at the person who sits in the seat next to yours: Bang Chan.
“Hello again”, he smiles at you, a handsome smile with dimples showing and everything. He greets the others after.
You look at Yuna and Jeongin, she is frowning just like you and her boyfriend is eating like this is an ordinary situation in your daily lunch.
“Hi”, you sister answers, “I don't think we met before”
“Oh, yeah, I'm Bang Chan!” He stretches his hand so she can shake it. “Jeongin is an old friend and I have communication class with y/n”
“Ah”, she nods, looking at her boyfriend. You stay in silence, playing with your food, waiting for Jeongin to send Bang Chan away.
“Babe, I forgot I have a project due tonight”, Jeongin says, slapping the palm of his hand on his forehead. He stands up, “can you help me? Chan will keep y/n company.”
No. You don't want him to keep you company. Your eyes widen and you stare at your sister, trying to send her a mental signal so she won't let you alone with him.
What you don't see, it's that she has already caught up on the way Bang Chan is looking at you and she might think she understands what's happening.
“Okay, yeah. Take care of her”, your sister says, smiling apologetically to you while she gets up and follows Jeongin out of your sight.
You should just throw your food away and go to the library, maybe you can eat a sandwich.
“Would you like to go on a date with me?” You hear Bang Chan's voice before you can put your plan into practice, turning around to look at him with the most terrified face he ever saw on someone. “Ouch, does the idea scare you so much?” He jokes.
“Why would you want to go on a date with me? We just met yesterday”, you point out, holding yourself back so you won't just stand up and run away.
“I find you interesting, it's just a date so we can get to know each other better”, he shrugs. He's so nonchalant about it, while you're freaking out inside.
“I don't think that's a good idea, I'm not good at keeping conversations, you'll get bored”, you say frantically. You just didn't expect him to laugh.
“I can do all the talking, I love to talk"
Chan knows this move is risky and there's a high probability you won't accept, but he just felt like asking you at that moment.
“Are you sure you won't get bored?” You ask.
His eyes widen and he nods, are you really considering it?
You are, obviously. You bet no one could ever guess, but Bang Chan is your ideal type, actually he is probably everyone's ideal type.
He has the kindest smile you have ever seen and the way his eyes turn into crescents when he's smiling makes your legs weak. He met you yesterday, but you know him since 3racha performed in the university’s festival last year. Since the first time you two crossed paths, everything about him, appearance wise, seemed appealing: his dark eyes, his smile, his dark curls, his broad shoulders and his muscular body. That's why you freaked out so much when he spoke to you yesterday, you never thought he would give you the time of day. So you would be dumb to reject his offer.
“Okay”, you nod, handing your phone to him. “You can put your number there, I'll text you so you can save my contact”, you say and he stares at the device for a few moments before picking it up and typing his number.
This was easier than he thought.
—
“Do you have pepper spray with you?” Your mother asks for the 30th time in the last hour.
“Yes, mom. I'm going on a date with another student, he's not a criminal”, you tell her and your father tsks.
“There are alot of students that commit crimes”, he says.
“I know”, you sigh, “don't worry, I have pepper spray, emergency numbers and I'll turn on my localization”
Your sister is watching the scene unfolding in front of her, while she chuckles.
“You shouldn't laugh, if I start dating you will go through the same thing when it's your time”, you whisper at her and she sighs.
“You're not going to this date just so I can officially date Jeongin, right?”
You grin.
“You think too highly of me, I'm not that selfless”, you hear the sound of a horn in front of your house, “I'm going on this date because he's hot”
Chan thought you were pretty in your everyday clothes but after seeing you ready for your date he just couldn't take his eyes off you. You're wearing a little sundress with thin straps holding your much too generous and low cleavage. Your hair is down and your lips are red with lipstick.
He's waiting for you outside of the car so he can open the door for you, but when you stop in front of him, he just doesn't move.
You frown, waving a hand in front of his face.
“Are you okay?” You ask and he snaps out of his daze.
“Yeah, you're just too pretty”, he tells you honestly, “I just couldn't believe I'm so lucky”
You feel your skin hotter, you're sure your whole face must be red like a tomato.
The restaurant you are going to have dinner at is a bit further than you thought, it takes at least one hour by car to get there.
“Were all the places close to the city closed?” You try making a joke and he smiles.
“Considering your personality, I thought you would like this place better”, he tells you while you go in. A person greets you two, leading you inside. There's no open space, the building is full of rooms and you're guided to one of those. There's a glass wall in the back of the room with a view to a lake and a waterfall, there's colorful lights everywhere, making it even more beautiful.
“So, when I was searching for a nice place to go on a date, I came across this one.” Chan starts speaking and you notice there's a small stove on top of the table. “There's no attendants, so we will cook our own food and only call them if we want more servings”, he explains, pulling the chair so you can sit.
“Oh”, you feel a weird feeling on your stomach, are these the butterflies your sister told you about? You never knew something like this existed and the fact that he was attentive enough to take your shyness into consideration while choosing the place of your date makes you melt inside. “Thank you”, you tell him after sitting.
You don't shut up the whole night. This is the first time you feel so comfortable with someone other than your family.
“So, you want to work with entertainment?” He asks surprised.
“Yes, I really like the whole thing about managing an artist, it sound exciting”, you smile happily, “who knows, maybe one day I can manage 3racha”
“You have heard 3racha?” Chan asks, surprised.
“I really like your music”, you tell him, “besides, everyone knows about you guys”
“Yeah, but I didn't know you knew about us”, he smiles charmingly, leaning on the table while clasping his hands. “So does that win me some points? Maybe a kiss?”
You already are red because of the wine, now you feel your whole face hot. You're already feeling a bit out of it, not drunk enough to make a bad decision but definitely drunk enough to lose a bit of your shyness.
“I don't know how to kiss”, you say simply, no further explanation.
Chan almost chokes on the air he just breathed, he didn't think you would be so blunt about it. Curiously, he finds your innocent face while saying that too enticing.
“I can help you with that”, he says, tilting his head and winking.
“Would you really?” You ask and he nods. “Like now?”
Chan didn't expect that to happen so soon, especially with someone as shy as you. But he won't refuse your offer.
“Are you done?” He asks, eagerly, standing up and you nod. Chan stretches his hand to you, waiting for you to hold it.
He takes you to his car, helping you get in and fastening your seatbelt. He's not in his right mind, not at all, he didn't even drink so why is he so excited? He doesn't think he ever felt this way about a kiss. He drives for a while, looking for the drive in movie theater he had read about while looking for the restaurant.
After fifteen minutes he parks his car behind others, there are a lot of people there to watch the movie.
You have your hands on your lap, fidgeting with your fingers nervously. It's so endearing how innocent you are.
“Would you like to take a seat?” He asks and you frown, looking around and then looking at him. You are already seated.
He tilts his head, chuckling and patting his lap. You nod so fast, it's embarrassing. He smiles, seeing you climb on top of him, legs are over the cup holder, you're using him as a literal seat.
“You never kissed anyone?” He asks, while you adjust yourself on top of him, his breath hitting your neck, making goosebumps rise all over your body. You shake your head, feeling a bit insecure, what if you are no good?
Chan bites on his lower lip, shifting a bit so you won't feel his hardening cock under you, you're just too cute, too sexy.
“Okay, I'll go slowly, we can stop anytime you want”, he tells you, brushing his hand on your arm all the way to your neck, making you close your eyes to his touch. He pulls your face closer, touching your lips with his, it's warm and soft, it feels like heaven.
He brings his other hand to your cheek, caressing. He pulls back a bit, just enough so he can speak.
“Open your mouth for me, baby”, he tells you and you obey instantly, feeling his lips back on yours. His tongue brushes against yours and you whine, lifting your hands to grab on his shoulders to steady yourself, causing your ass to rub on his cock. Chan groans, making you flinch, did you do something wrong?
He notices your hesitancy, so he slides his hand to your waist, squeezing you in reassurance.
“Are you sure you have never done this?” He asks playfully and you smile, shyly.
“Can- Can we do it again?” You whisper, making him chuckle. Dear god, would he be able to stop this with just kisses?
“Did you like kissing me, princess?” He teases, seeing you blush. Chan wraps his arm around your waist, pulling you even closer. He lands a kiss on your exposed collarbone, tracing kisses up to your neck.
“You smell so good”, he tells you before leaving a kiss on your jaw, then on your chin and finally a peck on your lips.
“Must taste even better”, he thinks, smiling to himself.
Your phone starts ringing, taking you two out of that hazy atmosphere. You feel embarrassed now, not believing you actually acted that way. Going back to your seat, you pick up the call, it's Yuna.
“Mom and dad are freaking out because you stopped moving for too long”, she whispers. Shit, you forgot your localization was turned.
“Tell them you called Chan and I'm alright, my phone just died”, you instruct her.
“Yeah, got it, just hurry”
Chan probably heard the conversation, but you still feel upset that he started the car right away and drove fast back to your home.
When you arrive in front of your house, you're not sure if you should kiss him goodnight or just wave, both are awkward options for you, so you go with the one you want the most.
You grab his arm and pull him closer to you, kissing him on the lips. Chan is quite surprised with your bold action, but he won't complain, he can't get enough of your lips.
“I will text you when I get home”, he says after pulling away and you nod.
You get out of the car and walk to your door, stealing glances at Chan. He's giggling at your antics, watching until you are safe inside your house.
He should be thankful to Jeongin, he's finally having a good time.
—
Chan is taking his mission seriously, he's texting you everyday and even stopped seeing all his fuck buddies. This is the closest he ever got to a relationship, but you're not official yet.
Especially not when you're avoiding him like the plague when it comes to meeting face to face. You answer his texts normally but he has to literally hunt you down so he can find you in this damn university and if you see him before he sees you, it's game over, you'll hide immediately and he has to begin his search all over again.
This time, though, he caught you off guard. You are at the library, seated alone, trying to focus on the book you have in your hands.
He smiles to himself, knowing you can't escape anymore. Chan leans over, caging your body with his two hands around you, gripping the table.
“I missed you, baby”, he whispers and you shiver, feeling butterflies on your stomach.
“H-hi”, you say, closing your book and taking a deep breath.
You will not try and pretend you didn't hide from him for almost a week. But that's not your fault, it's your brain's.
After Chan left you home, you ran to your room, still feeling all tingly and hot from kissing him. Since Yuna didn't come to your room you guessed she was already asleep, so you took your makeup off, took a long bath and snuggled in your nice sheets.
The thing is: you had the most lewd, filthy, awfully good dream that night. You could never even say the things Chan did to you in that dream out loud.
You woke up sweaty, heavy breathing and panties soaked, this never happened to you before.
You just couldn't look at his face after that, you felt dirty and guilty with having those thoughts about such a nice guy.
“Am I wrong or were you avoiding me?” He asks, not moving from behind you.
“No- I wasn't”, you turn around to look at him, bumping into his face too close from yours. He glances at your lips, biting his lower one and chuckles. “I was just, hm, kinda embarrassed”, you tell him, aware that he's going to know right away if you try lying.
“Embarrassed about what?” He asks, tilting his head.
“I don't know”, you look away, trying not to give in and tell him about your dream.
“I think you should come to my place so we can talk about it”, he says and you choke on your own spit, struggling to function correctly. Did he just ask you to go to his house? Just you? And him? Just the two of you?
The apartment is not far from the campus, it's a maximum twenty minutes walk. The building is nice and modern, it absolutely matches what you had imagined Chan’s place would look like.
His apartment is huge, it's not possible that he lives there alone.
“I have three roommates, Jisung and Changbin you already know and Hyunjin, he's an arts major”
“Hwang Hyunjin? I know him, he's friends with my sister”, Chan nods, he forgot your sister dates Jeongin, she probably knows his entire group of friends.
“Do you want to drink something?” He asks, looking at you while you walk around the living room, looking at every corner but not at him.
“Water is fine”, you say, looking at some pictures he has with his friends. He always has that breathtaking smile that makes all your insides turn around.
“What about watching a movie?” He asks out of nowhere, sitting on the sofa. He looks at you, an arm resting on the back of the sofa.
“Sure”, you walk to him, sitting on the far corner. Chan has to bite back a laugh so you won't feel embarrassed, do you really think it's so easy for you to get away from him?
He turns on the movie, adjusting himself on his seat. You're really trying to pay attention to what's going on on the screen, but you just can't. Not when Chan's scent is all over the place, making you remember about your dirty dream.
He knows you're restless, he can see you fidgeting by his peripheral vision.
“Are you uncomfortable?” He asks, turning his head towards you, with a smirk plastered on his lips. “Maybe you can sit here again, I'm sure you are going to like it better”, he pats on his lap.
You feel your face red.
“Stop teasing”, you mumble, pouting, “that's not nice”
He chuckles. If you're not coming to him, he has no problem going to you, so Chan slides his body closer, making you stare at him with a frown.
He raises his hand to your face, cupping it and caressing your cheek.
“Tell me you don't want this, princess, I'll stop”, he says. But you want this more than anything in the world, how could you not?
You lean a bit, trying to close the gap between your mouths. Oh, how much Chan missed your soft lips, he felt almost like going through a withdrawal staying so long without kissing you.
You learn fast, your mouth opens right away after your lips touch. In a bold move, your tongue is the one to look for his first, making him groan. He puts his right hand on your thigh, squeezing it harder than he predicted, but he didn't predict the bite you would give on his lip at that exact moment.
Chan grabs your hip, pulling you up to his lap, this time with a leg on each side of him. You're looking at him in that innocent way when all he has on his mind are the dirtiest thoughts. He caresses your thigh, sliding his hand to grab your ass and pulling you closer to him.
“Will you tell me now, why you were embarrassed? You looked pretty fine when I left you home after our date”, he asks and you blush instantly, oh, you forgot about the reason you are here. You can't tell him about your dream, you'll die of embarrassment if you do.
“It was- nothing”, you lie, avoiding his eyes. Chan noticed this already, you always look anywhere but him when you are lying to him.
Maybe he'll have to make you tell the truth.
“Really?” He says, skeptical. “Then you were just being mean? Playing with my feelings after just one date?” He's teasing, he knows you'll give in eventually, it's just a question of time.
“No, I wasn't”, you argue, with a frown on your face, your lips shut tight in a pout.
“Baby”, he calls, your legs would definitely give out if he called you like that while you were standing. “I don't like liars”
Chan slides his hands up to your ass, grabbing a handful and pulling you closer. You can already feel something hard beneath you, making you shift and adjust on his lap, involuntarily seeking some friction. Your core is aching, just by staying so close to him.
“I'm not lying, that's mean”, you try changing the subject and he chuckles.
Chan comes closer, lips brushing against yours, his breathing hitting on your mouth, everything just making the wet spot on your panties grow bigger and bigger. He kisses you, a nice and soft kiss with his tongue caressing yours gently.
Chan notices that you're moving your hips slightly, trying to feel his cock. He smiles during the kiss, pulling away while putting his hands on your hips, guiding your movements to be harder.
“Hm”, you whine, feeling his hard on giving you the friction you're looking for. His hand cups your cheek, pulling you closer into a kiss again.
You never felt this way, like ever. You did masturbate but it's different to do it with another person. It's just so good to feel Chan's touch on your skin, his breathing, his muscular arms holding you. You feel your orgasm coming, you can't believe you're going to cum by just rubbing yourself on this man.
Chan knows you're almost there, that's when he grabs your hips steadying you, not letting you move further. He earns a whine from you, an angry look on your face.
“I will only let you keep going if you tell me why you were embarrassed and avoided me”, he says cockyly and you shake your head, trying to move again but his grip on your hips is too strong.
“I don't wanna”, you tell him.
“Then, I guess you won't be cumming today”, he shrugs. “At least, not with me”, he smirks to your face becoming even redder.
“You're such a meanie”, you whine, pouting, still trying to move again but he just won't let you.
“Are you going to tell me what I want to know?” He tilts his head.
You ponder for a moment, what should you do? It's not going to end here, if you don't tell him right now, you're sure he won't let it go.
“I- I had a dream”, you start, trying to gather some courage.
“Uhm”, he nods, “what about it?” He asks curiously, feeling strangely aroused by the way you're looking around, lips pulled into a line and the way you're speaking leads him to believe you're talking about a wet dream.
“Li- like one of those dreams”, so he was right, did you have a wet dream about him? That's interesting.
“Hm, you'll have to be more specific, princess”, he pushes, “I don't think I know what you're talking about”
“I mean”, you groan, dropping your head to his shoulder so you won't feel his eyes on you. “A sex dream… with you”, you whisper.
The grin on Chan's face after you finish saying that, is priceless. He can feel his cock twitching, he's eager to know more.
“Tell me more about it”, he presses, “I really wanna know what happened in that dream that left you so embarrassed”
“Please, Chan. Don't make me say it”, you beg, but he's not having it. He likes seeing you blushing and struggling to talk dirty, it's endearing.
“No can do”, he grabs your shoulder to pull you away so he can look at your face. “I promise I'll give a nice reward if you tell me”
You nod. If he won't drop it, then you have to try and earn something over your embarrassing situation.
“I- like- you ate me out”, you start and he smiles, he would indeed love to do that. “And I s-sucked you off, it was nice”, you stumble over your words in each sentence. Chan can only feel even more turned on, your lips are so soft, he can't even picture what it would feel like to have them wrapped around him.
“Keep going, princess. You're doing great”, he reassures you. Chan loosens the grip on your hips, guiding your movements back and forth once again.
“And you said all these dirty things to me, I can't say it out loud, please”, he smirks, pulling you even closer and pressing your covered core against his cock.
“Did I tell you how good it felt to have your pretty little mouth sucking on my cock?” He asks playfully and you nod, feeling the warmth creeping in your face again while that tingly sensation grows bigger in your lower stomach.
“Did we fuck?” He asks, feeling himself getting closer to cum too.
“Yeah”, you nod frantically with your eyes closed shut. “You fucked me on all fours and in this same position too”, you tell him.
“Oh? Did you ride me? Did you like it?”
“I did”, you struggle to make your voice come out, feeling too light headed to even speak properly.
“There's something more, right, baby?” He feels his cock throbbing, he's almost at his limit.
“Yes, you- you choked me a bit, I liked that”, and that sentence was enough to make Chan reach his orgasm, being followed by you right after.
He can't believe he really did cum in his pants, like a fucking teenager. It's your fault actually, how can someone make him cum like this and still look angelic and innocent? Like you never told him he choked you and you liked it, even though it was a dream.
Chan kisses you eagerly this time, his chest is feeling hot and he feels a weird sensation on his stomach.
“You shouldn't feel embarrassed about this kind of thing”, he tells you and you nod, because it's true, “if it makes you feel better, I'm sure I had worse thoughts about you”, he smiles, seeing you blush.
“Like what?” You ask, curiously.
“Oh, I won't tell you”, he shakes his head, “you would never look at me again if you knew all the dirty things I wanna do to you”
—
Another week went by and now you were not avoiding Chan anymore. He follows you around pretty much all day at school, stealing kisses and pulling you to empty classrooms to have make out sessions.
It's time for him to meet your parents, it's not something he ever did, he never dated anyone after all. It's a Wednesday night, he brought flowers and a bottle of wine. So five minutes before the set time, he's knocking at your door.
Your sister opens up, greeting him but you're nowhere to be found until he hears your voice from upstairs.
“Is he already here?” You sound panicked and your sister giggles.
“Yes! Hurry up”, she says and Chan hears something falling and making a weird noise. It was not loud enough to be a person so he's not worried you fell, but he finds it funny to think about you nervously stumbling around.
When you show up at the top of the stairs, he has to blink a few times to actually believe you're real. You look so beautiful, showing your nice legs in a short skirt and your shoulders in a tank top.
“Hey”, you greet him, looking at the things he has in hands and he finally regains his composure.
“Hi”, he gives you a peck on the lips, “this is for you” he hands you a bouquet of red camellias.
You stop for a second, you never received flowers. Before you can answer him, your father's head is popping out of the living room.
“Why is it taking so long for you to bring this guy inside?”, he asks grumpy, he's not too happy about you dating but there's nothing he can do about it.
Chan straightens himself, walking to your father to greet him.
“Good night, sir. I'm Bang Chan”, he clears his throat when your father doesn't say a thing, just staring at him. “I brought this for you”, he shows the wine bottle and your father takes it.
“At least you have good taste”, he nods to the wine bottle Chan stole from his father's collection.
He turns around, shrugging to you and you smile, listening to your sister's chuckles. You take his hand into yours, interlacing your fingers.
In the living room there's a woman that looks too much like you and your sister to not be your mother, she smiles kindly at you two.
She's less intimidating than your father so Chan's greetings to her are less awkward this time. As time goes by, your parents warm up to him, making jokes and even telling him about your childhood.
“The night went great”, you say while walking Chan to his car. “Thank you for coming”
“Your parents are great”, he says, leaning on the door of his car. He takes your hands in his and pulls you closer, wrapping his arms around your waist. “Thank you for inviting me”
He looks so good tonight, his dark hair is carefully styled and he's wearing much more formal clothes than usual, making him look like a prince.
“Can I have a good night’s kiss?” He asks, slyly, seeing you eyeing him up. You nod, putting your hands on his chest and closing the gap between your mouths. Chan's hands slide from your waist to your ass, squeezing slightly, he can't get too into it since he won't be able to go further than a kiss tonight.
You pull away from him when you have to breathe, his lips are so inviting you could kiss him all night long.
“I will see you tomorrow”, he tells you.
There's something wrong with his heart, it's beating so fast he thinks he may be dying. After driving away from you, he calms himself a bit. It's not possible that you were the cause of that reaction, right? This is supposed to be fun, he only has to date you for a while and then break up, no strings attached. So why does he feel such hurt in his chest after thinking about leaving you?
After one more long and sleepless night Chan realized something: he is in love. This feeling snuck in so unexpectedly he didn't even notice he was falling in love. Chan never fell in love before, so he can only guess that this is how it feels to love someone.
He notices every little detail about you, he jokes around all the time waiting to hear you laugh about something he says. Chan likes the way you smell, the way you smile, the way you just look at him so focused while he is speaking. He is in love with your personality, your cleverness, your kindness, your beauty is just a bonus that makes him even more in love with you.
He wants to confess to you, ask you to be his girlfriend, to never leave him.
He even asked for your sister's help to make something for you, maybe a song, he can definitely make something beautiful and romantic for you. Maybe he can cook too, he wants to make you feel appreciated.
He's waiting for your class to finish, seated on the bench in front of the classroom while scrolling through his phone.
He feels someone sitting by his side and before he can look, a kiss lands onto his cheek. Chan puts his hand on his face, blushing and you laugh seeing his reaction. You two did much more than just a kiss on the cheek, why is he embarrassed about it?
“Did you miss me?” You ask him and he rolls his eyes.
“Of course I did”, he grabs your hand, interlacing your fingers. “Should we go to my place?” He asks and you nod, standing up, pulling him to get up too.
It's still a bit weird that you two are together, you never thought liking someone as much as you like Chan could actually happen to you, you could even say you're in love. The only thing that still makes you doubtful is the fact that he didn't ask you to be his girlfriend yet, you have been going out for a month and you do everything together, so why hasn't he made it official?
You still have many questions in your mind, sitting on Chan's bed while he makes popcorn and you choose the movie you're watching tonight.
He enters the room, closing the door and turning off the lights, two water bottles and a huge bowl in his hands.
“What movie did you choose?” He asks, but you can't hear it, your mind is too loud. “Y/N? Are you alright?” He asks, snapping you out of your thoughts.
“Are we exclusive?” You ask out of nowhere, ripping the air out of his lungs.
“Yes”, he says firmly, “do you want to be with other people?”
Chan asked that, but he's holding his breath until you answer him, hoping you're going to deny. For a moment, you don't say a thing and seeing you hesitate makes his heart ache.
“No, I-” you try speaking, trying not to sound ridiculous, “I want to be exclusive, I just don't know if you want that”
Chan takes a deep breath, putting the things he has in hands on the nightstand.
“Of course, I want to”, he takes your hand into his, bringing it to his mouth so he can kiss the palm. He's feeling guilty, he's taking his time preparing a nice confession but you're feeling insecure. “I'm sorry I made you feel like I didn't want things to get more serious”, he climbs on the bed, getting closer to you, “let me show you that you're the only one I want, hum? Can I?”
You suck on your teeth, knowing exactly what is about to happen but you just can't say no to him, let's be real, you don't want to say no to him. So you nod, making him smile.
Chan is eager to have you, he has been for weeks, just waiting for you to be ready to give yourself to him. He cups your face, pulling you closer and kissing you.
He helps you lay down on the bed, towering over you while landing kisses down your neck. You feel him biting on your shoulder and he brings his hands to the hem of your shirt, pulling it up. His hands travel around your body, making you hotter.
“You're so pretty, princess”, he says, kissing your chest. You whine, he's taking too much time to get to the place you want the most.
“Channie”, you whisper, “please, touch me”, you ask him.
His smile grows bigger as he mumbles “your wish is my command”. Chan unbuttons your pants, pulling them down your legs, throwing it someplace in the room.
He slides his hand down to your core, your underwear is soaked. He pulls your panties down your legs and brushes a finger along your folds, collecting the wetness before inserting a finger inside, you arch your back to the feeling. It's delicious, but it hurts a bit. It's different from how it feels doing it alone.
“Is this okay?” He asks and you nod. “You're such a good girl, baby, all wet and ready for me.” He whispers, getting closer to your face again. I'm going to put another one”, he tells you. The sensation it's too much already, his fingers are too much.
“Chan”, you moan, “I'm gonna cum if you keep doing that”
“Oh? But I didn't even get to the better part”, he answers pressing his thumb on your clit, making circles.
“Fuck”, you whine.
His smirk grows while he keeps the movement of back and forth inside of you. Before he can tease you more, your legs are shaking and your tight hole is clenching around his fingers. You put your hand on your mouth, covering it so you won't make a loud sound, but he doesn't like that. He wants to hear how well he's fucking you.
“Let's not do that, okay? I want you to be loud, want to hear you scream my name” He says, pulling his fingers out of you and sliding them on his mouth. He comes closer, kissing your neck and face, helping you calm down after your orgasm.
Goosebumps rise all over your body, his kisses feel like fire on your skin, you thought you'd feel less horny after cumming, but you're still so turned on.
Chan kisses your chest, opening your bra. You feel embarrassed when he sees you completely naked.
“You're still dressed”, you point out, face red.
He gets out of the bed immediately, taking his shirt off and his pants too, crawling back to you in only his underwear. His cock is hard, outlined by the thin fabric of his boxers.
You feel the urge to touch him, maybe taste it. So you grab his length, making him groan.
“What are you doing, princess?” He asks, eyes closed from the pleasure of having your beautiful hands wrapped around him.
“I want to make you feel good”, you tell him, pushing his chest and making him fall on his back on the bed. You kiss his neck the same as he was doing to you, suddenly feeling possessive and sucking on the skin, leaving a few hickeys there.
You go down, kissing his chest and stomach, getting closer and closer to his throbbing cock. You pull his underwear down and his cock spring on your face.
“I just- you need to teach me”, you tell him. How can you look at him with such innocence in your eyes when you're about to suck him off?
“Hold the base”, he instructs, “now you can go up and down with your hand.”
He feels your movements, making him groan. You are bolder than he gives you credit for, since you lick the head of his cock without being told to. You wrap his dick with your mouth, waiting for the next command.
“You can go up and down, princess, yes, like that” he moans, feeling his cock being embraced by your warm mouth.
Chan feels like exploding any time now, weeks of pent-up sexual tension being released. He sees you rubbing yourself on his bed while sucking on him, that just makes him crazier, he wants to make you feel good now, he can let you do the same for him another time.
“Baby”, you hear him say and you stop your movements. “I won't be able to last long with your soft mouth doing that, I need to feel you around my cock”
You nod, letting go of his cock and climbing up, stopping on top of Chan.
“I wanna be on top”, you say confidently.
“Let's do it slowly okay? I don't want to hurt you”, Chan tells you and you agree.
He grabs the base of his cock, brushing the head on your folds, trying to wet it enough to make it easier for you.
It feels like heaven when his cock finally slides inside of you, you're so tight he feels like he can cum at any moment.
Chan sees the pain in your eyes, he doesn't move, “do you want to stop?” He asks worriedly, putting his hands on your hips to stop you from moving but you shake your head.
You keep pushing it in, trying to relax. Chan kisses you, massaging your breasts to help you relax a bit.
When the painful part is gone and you're feeling all the good sensations back, you don't think you can stop, it's too addictive. You start riding on him freely, hands taking support on his chest and head thrown back, the pleasure is just too much, you'll be coming soon.
“Fuck, you look so good riding me, princess”, he says, feeling his own high almost catching him.
“Oh, Channie, I'm gonna cum”, you whine, fastening the movements of your hips, “please, oh, your cock feels so good”
For someone who couldn't talk about a wet dream a few weeks ago you sure talk dirty in real life, Chan chuckles, feeling you clenching around him and when you squeeze his cock for the last time he cums too, filling you up.
You collapse on top of him, breathing heavily. Your eyes are heavy, you're not sure if you can stay awake. Chan caresses your back and plays with your hair, making you fall fast asleep.
You wake up feeling just a bit sore. You're on cloud nine, the night was amazing. When you open your eyes, there's no one in the bed with you. You wrap yourself in the blankets trying to find and collect all your clothes scattered around the room.
The delicious smell that embraces your nose the moment you step out of the room, is enough to make you drool.
Chan is in the kitchen, dressed in nothing but sweatpants and an apron. That's right, he's shirtless. You're feeling bold today, so you get closer to him wrapping your arms around his waist in a back hug.
He lets out a laugh, putting his hand over yours and turning off the stove. He turns around, hugging you.
“Did you sleep well?” He asks, kissing your forehead and you nod, snuggling in his embrace.
“Why didn't you wake me earlier? I woke up missing you”
“Ow, my baby is so needy”, he teases, making you pout. “I was making you, breakfast”
“Hm”, you look at what he was cooking.
“How are you feeling?” He asks, a bit worried, it was your first time after all.
“I'm doing great”, you smile, “just a bit sore, but it's nothing”
He nods, putting his hands on your shoulders and turning you around.
“I'm happy to hear that”, he kisses the top of your head, guiding you to take a seat on the table. “Let's eat so we can go for another round then”, he smirks.
—
“Jeongin is coming here today?” You ask your sister and she nods frantically while fixing her hair.
“He's coming to ask dad's permission to date me”, she giggles excitedly.
“Alright”, you smile seeing your sister so happy.
You're the one opening the door for Jeongin while your sister is getting ready, he's clearly nervous but he's trying to keep his smile.
“Hey!” You give space for him to enter, “Yuna is almost done”
He nods, looking around. Your sister comes down minutes later, leading Jeongin to the living room.
Your father is less hostile to him than he was to Chan, maybe it's because Jeongin is adorable.
After an hour of conversation, you go upstairs, you have a date tonight and need to get ready.
The memories from your night with Chan flood your mind making you giggle and kick your feet, they have been your most cherished thoughts lately. It's a struggle but you finally end your bath after probably an hour.
You walk back to your room, you're already late. However, you stop in front of your sister's room when you hear voices being a little bit too loud.
“You did what, Jeongin?” your sister's voice is a pitch higher than usual.
“I didn't think things would get out of hand”, Jeongin answers, are they fighting?
“In what world did you think that was a good idea?”
“I was desperate, I'm not proud of that”, he answers back.
“There's no excuse for you to ask Bangchan to date my sister”, she tries speaking lower but you still can hear them. Your whole world crumbles with that one sentence, what does she mean by that?
“I didn't do it to be mean, I know how hard it is for your sister to get to meet new people, I thought it would benefit the both of us”, he tries explaining. Your heart is beating too fast, the throbbing in your ears grows stronger and your legs are giving out.
“How am I supposed to tell her now? She is so happy” Yuna cries out. “Don't come any closer, get out of here”, you panic instantly, they can't see you there. But you're too slow, when you finally manage to move Jeongin is swinging the door open. He stops on his tracks, turning white on the spot.
“Y/N-”, he tries to speak, but you run to your room before he can say anything else.
You can't believe this is actually happening to you, you thought that someone finally liked you but everything was a lie? That's not possible, right?
You are going to go to Chan, you two have a date, and he is going to tell you that Jeongin is lying, that he was just joking.
The uber to Chan's apartment doesn't seem to show up fast enough and the ride there couldn't be slower. You're restless, fidgeting with your fingers and shaking your legs.
You pay the man, practically running out of the car and running upstairs. The person who opens the door is not Chan but Changbin, you met him a few times when you were visiting the apartment.
“Hey, y/n”, Changbin greets you. “Chan is not home, but he will be here soon, I heard you have a date”, he says, letting you in.
“I'm going to wait for him in his room”, you tell him, too disturbed to worry about proper manners.
You walk back and forth in the room, anxiously waiting for Chan's arrival. You hear his voice after twenty minutes, he's talking to his friend in the living room when Changbin tells him you're there.
You can hear the fast footsteps leading to where you are, you take a deep breath, trying not to cry.
“Hey, baby”, Chan smiles at you, dropping his bag on the floor and walking towards you with open arms. “Did something happen?” He stops, noticing your face.
You stare at him for a minute, brows knit together and eyes trying to find the least bit of sincerity in the time you two spent together.
“Did you ask me out as a favor to Jeongin?” You ask and his standing falter, how did you find out?
“L-let me explain”, he says, taking a step closer to you.
“So you did”, you feel the tears trying to escape from your eyes.
“Please, just… just hear what I have to say”, he asks, trying to hold your hand, but you pull away from him.
“I don't want to hear a thing from you”, you tell him, running your hands through your hair.
It really was all a lie. How could you be so dumb?
You walk past him, trying to get out of the room, go anywhere but there. But Chan grabs your arm, making you stop in your tracks.
“Please, don't leave”, he begs. You feel a pang in your chest, but it doesn't make a difference since you're already hurting too much.
“You have no right to ask me that”, you pull your arm out of his grasp and walk out of the apartment.
It would be too humiliating to enter the uber while bawling your eyes out, so you decide to walk. You walk for a long time before your feet start hurting and your eyes are burning from how much you cried. You can't believe you really let yourself fall pray to such a scheme, you thought you were smarter than that.
It's obvious you only fell for it because it's Chan, you were attracted to him since the first time you laid eyes on him. You try to believe that it wouldn't be that easy to trick you if it was anyone else.
After at least two hours, you finally reach your house and you're feeling utterly miserable. You greet your parents and walk upstairs, anxiously searching for your room so you can finally let yourself fall and cry as much as you can.
Your sister is seated on your bed, biting on her nails. She stands up as soon as she sees you.
“I'm really sorry”, she says, teary.
You sigh, feeling the weight on your chest even heavier.
“It's not your fault”, you tell her. You start to undress, looking for your pajamas so you can snuggle on your bed until all of this passes.
“I shouldn't have started dating before you”, she whines.
“I don't blame you, so stop doing that to yourself”, you say, even though you feel a bit of resentment because Jeongin likes her truly, he likes her because she's her. Of course no one's going to like you, you're… you.
“But”, she bites on her lower lip, not sure if she should say this, “I think Chan really likes you-”, she stops talking when you give her the meanest glare you ever threw in someone's way.
“I don't want to hear it”, you say.
“He even asked help so he could confess to you in a way you would like”, she continues.
“I'm not going to repeat myself”, you say and your sister knows that tone too well, it's better for her to stay silent for the time being. “If you're done, I would like to be alone”
Yuna nods, glancing at you all the way to the door.
You collapse on your bed, finally able to cry your eyes out without people looking at you in a weird way. This is the moment you realize how much you love Bang Chan, the pain you're feeling is greater than anything you ever felt in your whole life, you truly don't think you'll be able to survive this.
Chan is an idiot, he knows this and you are right to never look at his face again. But even though he knows you're right, he can't accept the thought of you leaving him.
He tried calling and texting you, you blocked him. He tried talking to your sister, she cursed him out and told him to leave you alone. She and Jeongin are on bad terms right now but they didn't break up yet.
He tried to find you in the university, but you didn't show up for the entire week, he just doesn't know what to do.
“You are an idiot”, Hyunjin says after listening to the whole story, “you should have told her about it while you still had time”
“I didn't know I was in love”, Chan runs his hands through his hair, “not until it was too late”
His friend sighs, he just can't see Chan like that anymore. He's just miserable, he looks like he's dying and Hyunjin doesn't doubt it could actually happen at this point.
So as a good friend, he takes this matter into his own hands and calls your sister, trying to convince her to listen to Chan and maybe forgive Jeongin too, Hyunjin is tired of him whining all day long.
“Did you really call me here for this?”, Yuna asks, ready to grab her things and go home.
“Hear me out, okay?” He says. “I know what they did was wrong but they regret it, Jeongin even told you about it”
She huffs, crossing her arms.
“He told me because I was talking about how Chan wanted to ask y/n to be his girlfriend”, she says. “He felt guilty, he would have never told me about it otherwise”
“Chan really likes y/n, he really wants to be with her”
Yuna sighs, she knows that. There was no way Chan could fake the way he looked at you.
“She's not going to believe that”, Yuna says, “y/n is heartbroken, she's not even going to her classes. She just stays in her room all day, crying’
“There's nothing better to fix her broken heart then”, Hyunjin points out, “let's help them meet, they can talk things out that way”
“She doesn't want to see him”, Yuna sighs, “but I do think this is the best solution”
“Okay, I'll text you the day and time, just bring y/n, Chan will take care of the rest”
Yuna nods, collecting her things but before she can stand up, Hyunjin's voice sounds again.
“About Jeongin-”, he starts, but she cuts him off right away.
“This whole mess started because of Jeongin”, she takes a deep breath, “after y/n and Chan resolve this matter I'll see what I'm going to do about him”
Yuna turns around, leaving Hyunjin there. At least he got Chan a chance, he can't save everyone.
Chan can't take it anymore, he has to see you. So he musters all the courage he has and goes to your house. It doesn't help that it's 2 a.m. so everyone is sleeping, except you it seems, since there's light coming from your room.
He begins throwing rocks at your window, trying to make you notice him and after a few tries he sees your face popping out.
Chan wishes he didn't come at all, your face is puffy so he knows you have been crying and the way you're looking at him, it's just awful, he feels despicable. More than he has felt all this time without you.
“What do you want?” You ask, at least you didn't ignore him.
“Can you come down for a bit?”
You sigh, you don't actually want to, but you're afraid he'll make too much noise trying to convince you to go down and wake up the neighbors or even worse, your parents.
You close the window, he knew it would be hard, that you wouldn't want to see him. Before he can turn around and walk away, Chan hears the sound of the front door opening.
You are in your pajamas, holding yourself trying to protect your body from the cold air.
You stop in your tracks, looking at him with an intense gaze, like you can read all his thoughts and know about all his mistakes.
“How have you been?” He asks and you scoff.
“Are you here to survey my mood? I have been feeling like shit, what about you?” He remembers the first time he talked to you, how he wished to see you mad, now he regrets that. He never wanted to see you mad at him.
“I'm not well either”, he says.
You sigh.
“Now that we know how each other is feeling, you can go”, you tell him.
“Can you let me explain?” He pleads.
“Did you start dating me as a favor for Jeongin?” You ask and he sighs, nodding. “That's all I need to know, I would appreciate it if you don't come looking for me anymore”, you say, turning around and going back inside. Tears start running down your face while you go back to your room, when will this pain subside?
—
You are finally back at school, after moping around all day at home for an entire week, you decided it was time to get back to your life. Staying at home just made you feel worse, you didn't have a thing to distract yourself so you ended up thinking about Chan the whole time. That only weakened your resolve to forget about him, you avoided coming to school because you knew you would give in if he tried to approach you.
Your day goes by fast enough and you just want to go home to lay on your bed. You feel your phone buzzing, it's a message from Jeongin. You were so angry with Chan that you forgot to block him.
He should be begging to meet Yuna, so why is he asking to meet you? Maybe he wants your help to fix things between them.
You don't know why you decided to meet him, maybe it's curiosity to know why he did such a thing to you or maybe you want to look at his face and curse at him.
He arrives at the cafe at the set time, looking around for you and walking towards you when his eyes lock with yours.
“Hey”, he says, sitting in front of you. You don't say anything back, not in the mood to be polite.
Jeongin sighs, he expected this much.
“I wanted to talk with you about this whole situation, believe me I didn't mean to hurt you even though it ended up happening in the end-”
“I considered you my friend”, you say making him stop talking.
“I- I'm”, he says, voice a pitch higher.
“Friends don't do what you did”, you say and he nods.
“I know it was an ill executed plan, but my intentions weren't bad, I swear”, he tells you.
“And do your intentions matter if I was the one hurt in the end?” You ask, angrier now.
“No”, he answers. “I'm truly sorry, I swear, I just caught you staring at Chan more than once. I thought this would be good for us both but I was clearly wrong”
You huff, exhausted. You start collecting your things to go home but you hear Jeongin's voice once more.
“Chan really likes you, he fell in love with you”, he says and your heart skips a beat, it shouldn't be behaving like this, not after the heartbreak you are going through.
“I don't care, he lost his chance”, you answer firmly, even though you know it's not true.
“Are you sure?” Jeongin asks, “are you sure you won't regret it? Not let him explain or not hearing him out?”
You glance at him once more, before standing up and walking out of the cafe.
Your mid terms are finally over, that means, you don't have anything to study so you're stuck with your thoughts. Your phone buzzes in your pocket, it's a message from Yuna, asking you to meet her in the arts department.
You reply, saying you'll be there in a moment. What is she even doing there? She's a business major.
The arts department is not far from yours, but it's emptier than you are used to. She asked you to meet in the first classroom of the second floor.
When you open the door, the first thing you see is Bang Chan. He looks awful, worse than you even.
You try going back, but he already saw you, so he stands up, coming closer.
“Don't leave, I'll do anything just… don't leave”
He's pale, and the eyebags he normally has are darker than usual.
“Are you sick?” You ask, worried. It's not like you can stop loving him in such a short period of time, of course you're worried.
“No”, he says, “I mean, I'm not feeling well, but I don't think I have an illness”
You nod, feeling awkward. It's been a while since you felt this way about him.
“Okay, then I'll get going”, you say trying to leave, but his voice stops you.
“I love you”, he is desperate, you can hear it in his voice. However, you're too petty.
“This was part of Jeongin’s plan too?”, you scoff, seeing his lips trembling.
He takes a deep breath, he deserves that, he knows he does.
“I really started going out with you because Jeongin asked”, he starts explaining, “but I fell in love with you, for real”
You feel your heart ache once more, he's about to cry, you can see it. But you're not sure if you can forgive him, even if what he's telling you is true.
“I don't believe you”, you say, shrugging, trying to hold your own tears.
“I will do anything to prove it to you, just say what I need to do for you to believe me”, he says, taking a step closer to you.
“I'm not sure if I'll be able to forget this or even forgive you, Chan”, you sigh, letting your heart speak and not your anger.
“I know I messed up, I don't deserve you I know that too”, he grabs your hand, “but please, I'll prove to you that I deserve a second chance, I'll earn back your trust”, he pleads.
You sigh, even after all this, it seems you still can't say no to him.
“I'm going to need some time”, you say slowly, “but I will give you a second chance, you better not ruin it”, you say.
Chan can't believe you're really going to try and forgive him, he can't ask for anything more.
“I won't disappoint you this time, I promise”, he says, kissing the palm of your hand, the same way he did before.
“Let's see about that”, you sigh, feeling your heart beating fast once again.
You may be making a stupid choice, but you'll only learn by making mistakes. You just sure hope this is not one.
A/N: If you like what I write please reblog or let me know in the comments, feedback gives me motivation to keep writing.
#stray kids#stray kids bangchan#skz bangchan#bangchan imagines#bangchan#skz bang chan#skz x you#bangchan x y/n#bangchan smut#bangchan x you#bangchan fluff#skz#bangchan x reader#skz imagines#skz x reader#stray kids imagines#skz fluff#stray kids scenarios#skz x y/n#skz smut
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Highest Bidder
Description: When you get Eddie to agree to be on auction for the Valentine’s Ball, you don't count on jealousy affecting you this much. To be fair, you didn’t think Chrissy Cunningham would be there. But maybe, just maybe, he likes you just as much as you like him?
Warnings: Angst, fluff and smut, my favourite horsemen. NSFW, Minors DNI or I'll shoot you with arrows and not the cupid kind. Slight older, 25 ish Eddie Munson x 23 ish fem reader, confessions, BFFs to lovers, oral fem receiving, p in v unprotected sex (dress before you impress irl)
A/N: So this was meant for Valentines but I decided to catch Covid instead. Inspired by the auction scene in Groundhog Day. I loved writing this, hopefully you get the desperate pining feeling that I was trying to give off. I love all of you, not only on Valentines but every day.
Comments and reblogs keep this little paper heart from bursting Into flames. Please, comment and reblog, it makes me so happy you don't even know.
7k words
Masterlist
“So sweetheart,” Eddie begins, a sly smile creeping over his face as he steeples his hands in front of him, elbows on his knees, “are you gonna tell me why you did it?” He's sitting across from you in his armchair, like this is some sort of bizarre job interview.
The surroundings are familiar. Eddie's second hand couch, the worn fabric soft under your thighs. The coffee table you helped drag up four flights of stairs, adorned with a coaster placed entirely for your benefit, of course. It's not like Eddie cares about water rings. The comforting smell of the fabric softener Eddie uses intermingled with cigarettes, and incense to cover the smoky aroma. That, and Eddie's aftershave; faint after a night in proximity of it, but there all the same.
The situation is not familiar. The wayward glances, the lingering touches, the tension filling the air so thick it's like trying to move through cake batter. Wading through some dense, sweet, all consuming feeling that sticks to your ribs and pulls you into its gravity.
Torn between looking at him and shyly stirring your drink with its straw, you think about it. Why did you? The answer wasn't simple. It never was, with Eddie.
It all started with the Valentines Charity Ball your mom roped you into helping to organise. She was a force to be reckoned with, your mom. The human equivalent of a wrecking ball. When she got involved with any good cause, no one and nothing could stop her. Including you.
So, when she ran to you in desperation last night, you didn't hesitate. One of the guys for the date auction had taken ill and she was stuck for a fourth. So, the first name you could think of spilled out of your mouth. It took some convincing. No, he's not just some freak. Yes, he's doing well for himself. Yes, he's got a steady job, an apartment. No, he doesn't deal anymore. Yes, he's good looking, obviously. No, we aren't a thing, we were never a thing.
You were never a thing. It was much more complex than that. Affairs of the heart always were. When you'd met Eddie at school you were quiet. A loser, living on the fringes of obscurity; not popular, but not strange enough to be bullied. Eddie was safe. A shield. You'd entered Hellfire without a second thought. And sure, he was handsome, ridiculously so. But at the time, he was seeing some twig called Stacey or Samantha or something, and you bit down on your attraction. Hid it deep within the tissue of your heart. Swallowed it whole. Then, you'd dated Thomas, and after that, he had seen Wendy, and then it was circumstantial. At no point had the pair of you been single together until recently, so it clearly wasn't meant to be. Whatever attraction you'd been harbouring was mellowed, dissolved and disintegrated in yourself. After that, he was just Eddie.
Convincing Eddie to do the auction had been an entirely different story. It wasn't nerves. He had stood on tables in the cafeteria to speak his mind, after all. He had conveyed his innermost thoughts to almost any who would listen, like some wayward preacher at a bizarre sermon. It could never be nerves, not with him. It was always the fear of not being enough. The fear of himself. After many words of encouragement, he'd agreed. If only to shut you up, but it worked.
What you hadn't accounted for was the sight of Eddie climbing out of his beat up van in a goddamn button up shirt and fucking dress shoes. In jeans that weren't ripped, with wild hair scooped back into a low bun. You hadn't counted on the easy smile you'd seen a thousand times now winding into your stomach and sending raven wing beats into your heart. In the soft wink that loosed a thousand moths within your core. Moths, they say, live at most, a day, but these seem ancient compared. Alive in an enclosure you had created years ago, set loose suddenly and all at once, their once fixated caretaker ignoring his responsibilities.
“Hey sweetheart, am I late?”
When had his voice gained that huskiness, that depth? When had looking into his chocolate brown eyes melted your insides? A twinge in your back brought on by the stress of the night took you back to the here and now. Gazing back at him whilst you attempted to rub it away, you replied.
“N-no, not at all. You, you look really good, Eddie.”
He scoffed aloud, shaking his head in disbelief, a cascade of loose curls flowing around his face.
“That's a load of crap. You, hey, you look amazing. Seriously, smoking hot.”
Your head span with the compliment, as you looked down at your own outfit. It was a ball after all, and for once your mom had insisted on a dress. It was a deep red, cheap satin, low cut, a tasteful hem at the knee, with a slit up the side providing at least a little mobility, and kitten heels. Currently, you felt like an outsider looking into a different world through plexiglass, but the way Eddie looked at you made you feel like you belonged.
‘It's nothing, just a dress.”
“Hey,” he replied, crowding your space with the confidence he embodies, “you look incredible. Trust me.”
His knuckles dragged across your flushed cheek, and for a moment all sense of who you were and why this was happening was lost to the feel of his skin on yours. But only for a moment. Dipping your eyes down, you took a tiny step back.
“We should head inside Eddie. You ready?”
After a couple of hours of cheesy music and weak as fuck punch, you tapped your fingers on your plastic cup and turned down the latest pensioner who thought you were here for his amusement. Until finally, the host tapped the microphone and asked everyone to gather at the front for the main event. You made your way to the side of the stage in case you were needed, and waited for the bidding to start.
“And now, ladies and gentlemen, we have the highlight of the night. For one night only, Hawkins’s most eligible bachelors will be yours, to an extent. Be prepared to be wined, dined, and entertained, by our finest gentlemen, all in the name of charity, of course. And first up, is our very own George Heights! Give it up for George everyone!”
The crowd clapped as George walked onto the stage, an early balding man with just the hint of a pot belly poking through his chequered blue shirt.
“George is an artist, and an aspiring architect, with a penchant for poetry and an insatiable appetite. Give it up for George, everybody!”
After a lukewarm auction, which ended with George being bought for 65 bucks, the next one was sold. And the next one. Pretty soon, it was Eddie's turn. He stepped forward, and whispers began to float around you. You expected that, to some extent, but there were woops, and even a wolf whistle too. Ever the showman, he bent into a low bow, straightened back up, and winked at the audience.
“And last, but not least, we have a handsome young man up for your bidding pleasure. Put your hands together for Eddie!”
As he did a turn on the spot, hands outstretched, the rouse of applause went on for longer than you thought it would. Enthusiastic hands clapped for your man.
No. Your friend. Just a friend.
“That's it, that's what we're looking for! Eddie is a mechanic, and a talented guitarist, who is looking for your company tonight! So, starting bid, can I hear twenty dollars?”
“Here! Twenty dollars!” An old lady waved her programme enthusiastically in the air. Eddie's eyes rolled and caught yours momentarily, and you flashed a smile at him.
“There we go, twenty! Can we go to twenty five?”
“Thirty!” an equally old lady shouted, earning you yet another look from him that made you laugh.
“Fifty dollars!”
The crowd went silent as a man in the back shot his hand in the air.
“Woah, a high bidder! Anyone want to beat fifty?”
Before the crowd had a chance to recuperate a young and extremely pretty woman's hand shot upward.
“One hundred dollars!”
Everyone fell silent. The only thing not getting the message was your heartbeat. The beautifully manicured and delicate hand belonged to none other than Chrissy fucking Cunningham.
She looked more beautiful than ever. Hawkins’s sweetheart, all grown up. The popular girl, the pretty girl. Prettier than you, at least to your mind. Prom queen, beauty pageant winner, and the icing on the cake? Actually a nice person. No one could hate her, it would be like kicking a kitten.
But as your heart dropped like a lead weight into your chest, you thought you wouldn't mind seeing a bit of fur flying across the room, guided by your heels.
You saw it, you couldn't fail to. The sudden way Eddie stood a little straighter, chest puffed up a little more, as a slow smirk crawled over his face.
“One hundred? Wowee! Thank you young lady! Anyone for one twenty?”
The man at the back called out, “right here!”
Chrissy giggled, small hand held up covering the cute noise, and made another bid.
“One thirty!”
It seemed like the entirety of your body's blood had rushed to your head. You felt dizzy and sick, watching this happen, like some slow motion car crash. Again, your damned back hurt. you rubbed it in vain, and gazed back at the ruin in front of you.
“One fifty!” The man at the back bellowed. Eddie's eyes widened, and he put his hands together, as if in prayer. His gaze was begging, pleading, and directed at Chrissy.
The frozen spell you seemed to have been under lifted suddenly. This was not going to happen, you wouldn't let it. Chrissy had everything she could possibly need, she didn't need more. She couldn't have him.
He's yours.
Through watery eyes, you fiercely trawled through your purse, and came across the little envelope you tucked in there earlier. The money you had scraped together to go towards buying a car. You'd almost forgotten it, intending to drop it home before you came here.
It looked like you'd have to be a pedestrian for a while longer.
At the same time Chrissy placed delicate fingers in the air, your whole arm shot up, purse clutched in hand.
“Two hundred and fifty two dollars and thirty nine cents!”
Gasps and grunts from the crowd echoed throughout the hall as everyone turned to face you. Even Eddie's jaw hit the floor. It took a moment for it to register, but when it did people were cheering.
“Well, I think that wraps it up folks! The highest bid of the night, sold to the very eager young lady in red right over here! What a great donation!”
He continued talking, wrapping up the show, and signalled for the music to start once again. Blood was hammering in your ears, making you almost oblivious to everyone around you. All you could focus on in your tunnel vision was Eddie as he walked to the edge of the stage, climbed off in a smooth hop, and started sauntering toward you.
“You know, if you wanted me that badly you could have just asked, sweetheart.” He said, as he flashed you a smug grin.
“Hey, I was just saving you from that guy over there, pretty sure he wanted more than a date.” Your words came out calmer than you thought you were capable of as you clenched a fist at your side to hide your shakes.
“Oh, really?” He asked, crossing his arms over his chest, “That's what you were saving me from, huh?”
He knew it was a lie. You knew it was a lie. You're pretty sure the entire hall knew it was a lie.
“Of course, don't want some old geezer putting his hands all over you. Not a fun Valentines. Plus, I own you now. You've gotta do what I say.”
Your hands dropped to your hips, holding them as you smiled at him.
“Kinky,” he replied, stepping closer, making you falter in your confident stance as you’re forced to look up at him, “so, what are your orders, princess?”
“Can you, get me a drink. A proper drink, from the bar? Please?”
Taking your hand in both of his, he brought it up to his mouth, pressing a soft kiss to it that turned your insides upside down.
“Easy. Your wish is my command. Jack and Coke, right?”
Gormlessly nodding, all you managed to say was a stunted “uh huh.”
He flashed that grin again, and bounced off with more of a spring in his step than usual.
You turned on your heel, begging yourself to get your head together, and busied yourself with gathering the donations for the auction, including your hefty one, and passed the cash to your mom to be locked away. When you approached, she opened her mouth but you wildly waved a finger at her.
“I know, I don't want to hear it. Not right now.”
She smiled, and just said, “pretty sure you could have got that date for free.”
Rolling your eyes and simultaneously rubbing your back, you passed over the cash and turned quickly, nearly slamming into someone.
“Easy princess, I know you bought me but I won't stand for full on tackling.”
He was holding your drink high, arms up to protect it.
“Sorry Eds, just escaping from-”
You looked over your shoulder, but your mom had disappeared.
“-nevermind. Thank you.”
As you grabbed your drink you took a generous gulp in a vain attempt to steady your nerves.
“So, now you have me, what are you gonna do to me?”
As he guided a wolfish grin to you, you simply rolled your eyes, trying to hide the fact that several unsavoury thoughts were swimming through your mind.
“What if I told you to hop on one leg and bark like a dog, huh?” You replied, sending a grin right back.
“Oh you don't think I would? Don't test me princess.”
You simply folded your arms and cocked your head, daring him with a look. Eddie nodded, and started fucking bouncing on one leg.
“Woof! Woo-”
“OK OK stop you weirdo!” Gasping a laugh, you grabbed him by the crook of his elbow and dragged him away from the curious stares of those around you.
As the song changed to a slow ballad, Eddie whipped the drink from your hand despite your protests and placed it on a nearby table.
“What are you doing?”
Grasping your hand he escorted you to the middle of the dance floor and suddenly pulled you so close that the air expelled from your lungs. There was no air, just music, and feeling, and Eddie.
“I'm dancing with you. Isn't this what you do on dates?”
As he held your hips, thumbs rubbing into your sides, your mind cleared. Like a bubble of smoke had popped. This felt good. This felt right. You circled his neck within your arms and relaxed for the first time that evening.
“This isn't a date, Eds.”
Your words held some spite, but it was belied by the smirk tugging at your cheeks.
“You are right. This isn't a date. If it was, well, we wouldn't be surrounded by geriatrics.” he nodded at the crowd around you, eliciting a high pitched giggle from your chest.
As you swayed in step with him, gazing into his chocolate eyes, the smirk only grew, fuelled by the mischief in his eyes.
“So, if this was a date, what would we be doing instead?”
A part of you wants to feel bashful and turn away, but the spell his eyes have you under is in control. No force on earth could tear your gaze asunder. The couples around you could burst into flames and be chalked up to little more than background noise.
“Well, first, I would have picked you up at your house, bought you some flowers too,” he said as he brought his hand to yours, holding it and pushing you into his frame even more, so you strained your neck up to him. His breath fanned delicately against your ear as he continued his explanation.
“Probably took you to a fancy restaurant, with fabric napkins,” he said, making you giggle at his understanding of ‘fancy’, “would have paid too. Maybe had some wine. Shared a dessert.”
“Yeah?” You nearly whisper it, words falling into the exposed skin of his neck.
“Yeah. Then, I would have taken you back to my place, offered you a cup of coffee,” suddenly he spun you, pressing his lithe front to your waiting back, his fingers scooping the hair from your neck sending comet trails of sensation down your spine. He continued, words making your head dizzy, “Then, I would kiss you, properly. Like you deserve to be kissed.”
As he spun you back to face him, you held his gaze for a moment, seeing every ounce of honesty etched into those big brown eyes.
“Eddie?”
“Yeah?”
“Let's get out of here.”
You shake your head, bringing yourself back to the here and now. Here you sit, opposite Eddie, invaded by his scent, debating whether or not to just tell the truth and hang the consequences.
Taking a gulp of your drink, you set it back down and look Eddie in the eye.
“Listen, I'm gonna be honest. I saw the way you looked at Chrissy and I… I was jealous. I didn't think, I just kinda acted. I'm sorry if it was weird.”
Bravery fleeing your bones leaving behind an airy wobble, you look at your own lap, fingers twisting over and over. You're only slightly aware of the shuffle and rustle of Eddie rising to his feet, of footsteps, of the dip in the couch next to you. Then, Eddie's large hand comes to rest over both of yours.
“Do you know why, sweetheart? Why were you jealous?”
His hand is steady, fingers stilling your movements confidently, but there's a quaver to his voice that seems entirely unlike him. Grasping his fingers, you absentmindedly play with his heavy rings.
“I feel stupid. I've had… kind of a crush on you, since high school.”
Of all the reactions, you hadn't expected a deep laugh to reverberate from his chest. Recoiling in horror, you shift your hands away from his and move to stand, your only thought to run, flee.
“No no no, please, sit,” he asks, hands grasping at your waist to keep you there, as you rub at the twinge in your back again.
“Turn around,” he says, and you don't find it in you to disobey. Firm hands stroke softly down your back, “you've been rubbing your back all night. Right here?”
Fingertips circle the spot that's been aching and you nod, confused.
“Eddie, if this is a rejection, it's a really odd one- oh fuck, right there.”
He chuckles lowly, knuckles working at the knot near your spine.
“It's not, it's really not. You're in pain, and I know you'd never ask. Plus, I, ha, don't have the balls to say this to your face.”
You don't say anything in response, you can't. Of course he's noticed you're in pain, he always notices stuff like that. The fact that this isn't a rejection though? It has your head reeling with so many thoughts that you can't express the words. Eddie clears his throat, hands rubbing into your skin through your dress, easing some of the building anxiety.
“I've got a secret. I've- had a crush, on you, since middle school.”
“Shut up!” You gasp, mouth hanging open at his confession.
“Absolutely not.”
“You didn't even know me in middle school Eds.”
“Yeah I did. Well, sorta. You remember that day I ran into the library? I asked for help?”
You pick at the scab of a memory, itching it to the forefront of your brain.
“Oh yeah, you were running from that idiot... Johnny?”
“Jimmy Salinsky. He was gonna beat on me. You, you didn't hesitate. You didn't even know me, but you told me to hide under your chair, you even threw your coat over your lap to hide me.”
“What else would I do?”
He snorted derisively, continuing his impromptu massage, “ignore me, tell me to fuck off, just like anybody else. But you, no, you didn't. Jimmy ran in looking for me and you didn't even lie! He asked if a freak had run in and you-”
“-I said ‘the only freak in here is you’, I remember.”
“That's right!” He laughs, squeezing your hips appreciatively, “Then he asked if you'd seen the poor kid, Eddie. You said, ‘I've never even met an Eddie’, which was true too. Not like I introduced myself before I dived under your chair. I remember crouching there, trying not to laugh, watching your little legs swinging. You had odd socks on, and you smelled really good. Anyway, I crushed on you hard.”
Head buzzing over his words, you try to organise your thoughts.
“Did the guys- did Hellfire know?”
“Sweetheart, I'm surprised you didn't know, it was common knowledge. I just thought you never liked me like that.”
Turning to face him again, you stroke hesitant fingers over his knee.
“Didn't say anything, you were seeing Stacey.” Eddie's face screws in confusion until clarity rings like a bell in his mind.
“Her? I wasn’t- that wasn't a relationship. I would have stopped in a fucking heartbeat if I'd known.”
“Oh. I dated Tom to get over you.”
“I dated Wendy to get over you!”
Sharing a laugh, you both hold eye contact, giggles dying at the realisation of what this means.
“So, Eddie, about that kiss…” you inch forward, ever so slightly nearer to him. A pink tongue darts out of his mouth, wetting his bottom lip.
“Yeah, that. That was me, running my mouth,” he says, anxiety wracking his voice as he strokes his neck compulsively, “Not that I don't want to kiss you, I do, just, erm, don't expect fireworks?”
It's almost like he's back at middle school, the nerves radiating off of him. Smiling sweetly, you take his hand and place it on your jaw, leaning into its touch. The breath he exudes is shaky as he moves closer, eyes darting to your lips as yours flutter shut.
It's tentative; a brush of his mouth as if he's scared of you running, of some practical joke. When you make no move to pull away his thumb strokes your cheek, lips now moving more confidently against yours. Your heartbeat is echoing inside your head as your hand slips to slither down his chest and around him, circling his side.
Only then does his tongue slowly snake out to wet your bottom lip; a silent plea which you happily grant. Still, it's delicate, tongues moving leisurely against one another as if you have all the time in the world. It's by no means dispassionate; far from it, it may be the most emotionally charged kiss of your life, but it feels like he's holding back.
So, you pull him closer by the front of his shirt, flicking your leg over his knee as your fingers tug hard. It's then that his tongue licks into you in earnest, thick and smooth, filling your insides with need. Just when you feel utterly consumed, whining inside his mouth, he breaks away. After a few pecks to your lips, he presses his forehead to yours, breath uneven, cooling your swollen lips.
“I'm in love with you.”
It comes out of his mouth in a rush. All you can do is stare gormlessly.
“Huh?”
“I love you. I just needed you to know that. This isn't just a- a thing. I'm in love with you, I have been since forever. I know it's a lot to take in, and I don't expect you to say it back I just need you to-”
You shut him up, pressing a hard kiss to his parted lips.
“Eddie, you lied.”
“What? I'm telling the truth I-”
“You said don't expect fireworks. You were wrong.”
Wasting no more time, you force your body onto him, tongue clashing against his teeth as the force of your kiss presses him backwards. His head makes contact with the arm of the couch, hands hot and heavy on your hips, pushing you into his bulge.
The fabric of your dress is constricting your movements, making you huff into his mouth.
“Eddie,” you manage in between spit slicked kisses, “unzip me.”
There's a cross between a grunt and a moan that vibrates from him into you as his hand wanders across your back, groping its way to the zipper. In a few short bursts he manages to unzip it, not once breaking the kiss.
Cool air hits your skin and you stand up, shimmying the dress to the floor and you straddle him moving in for-
“Woah, slow down a second, just, just wait.”
You try to kiss him again but he pushes you back, your ass flush against his crotch as you sit up. His gaze is scrutinising, examining every inch of your form, making you feel more exposed than you've ever felt in your life.
The desperate urge to shy away works into your arms as you cross them over your chest, but Eddie's having none of it. He tugs at them gently, pulling them to your sides as his thumbs rub encouragement into your skin.
“Sweetheart, there's a thirteen year old boy doing backflips in my head. Let him have a moment.”
A little laugh you let out comes out as a snort whilst he gazes up at you in wonder. So, you give him a show, flicking your bra undone in one practised movement and sliding the straps down your arms, eventually letting it fall to the floor.
“Jesus H Christ and all the angels.” He breathes, grip tightening on your forearms.
A quivering hand reaches up, and to your surprise, cups your face.
“You are so beautiful.”
Eyes suddenly watering, you blink twice to will the onslaught of emotion away.
“Not like Chrissy though,” you shrug, eyes downturned.
“No, you're not like her. You're beautiful, like you.”
Tugging you forward, he pulls you in for a breathtaking kiss, the full force of his feelings overflowing and filling your heart with heat. With a nibble to your bottom lip, he lets up for a second.
“Can we go to my bedroom?”
Nodding, you clamber off him and stand up. Eddie just makes a noise like you knocked the wind out of him, holding his hand to his heart.
“What?” You ask, hands on your hips, like it was normal to be standing in front of him in just a pair of panties.
“Don't look all stern like that, or I'm gonna bust in my pants,” he jokes, standing and crowding your back.
The journey to the bedroom takes a while. Mostly because you can't keep your hands off of each other. He's grinning, giddy as a school boy, firm hands pressing into your sides, hips, ass. You respond in kind, nearly ripping his shirt in your efforts to remove it, only managing to unbutton the offensive material to expose his lean tattooed torso.
Eventually, your spine hits Eddie's mattress, the soft furnishing welcoming you, begging you to sink in further. His touches are soft too, almost reverent in their delivery. He stands to remove his shirt and jeans, bulge prominent in his black trunks with little patterns on them. As he coaxes you further up the bed you squint and realise what they are.
“Eds… are you wearing Star Wars underwear?”
He chuckles, following your eyeline. “They are Darth Vader pants, to be specific, very manly.”
The smile you flash him almost hurts your cheeks, the situation feeling so close to normal. Normal adjacent at least.
“Yeah, very manly. Almost caveman like.”
“Look, I didn't think I'd have a hot girl watching me undress tonight, let alone the woman of my dreams. Just forget the nerd pants.”
You're laughing now, even when he's grabbing a pillow and getting you to lay on top of it, positioning you just where he wants you. Your giggles stop however, when he asks a question that steals your breath away.
“Do I need to put a towel down?”
“That's very presumptuous of you.” You smile, batting your eyelashes at him.
“Look, I'm just asking. I don't mind sleeping in a wet patch I just want you to be comfortable.”
He hovers over you, lips pressed into a line of concern. pressing your mouth to his to will the tightness away, you whisper into his face.
“You want me to stay?”
“Sweetheart, I'd ask you to move in tomorrow.”
The next kiss is a searing heat, all heaving tongue and grinding hips. His hand winds into your hair, tilting your head to get you just where he wants you. No longer the blushing boy, he's the confident man, taking just what he needs and giving you what you crave. It's fire, it's want, it's everything.
“Eds?” You murmur into his mouth as your hips chase his form.
“Hmm?”
“Get the towel.”
Hopping off of you, he practically skips out of the room, leaving you to debate whether or not to take your panties off. As you finally decide to strip them, fingers wedged into the fabric, he returns.
“Nope, just wait, please?” He asks, propping you up with ease to lay the towel down under you. So, you let go, allowing your arms to fall to your sides.
“Lemme look after you,” he says, climbing on top of you to plant open mouthed kisses to your neck. You nod, gasping when his teeth graze a sensitive spot on your neck. Short nails dig into his back as you whimper at the contact.
“Right there princess, hmm?” He chuckles, mouthing at your neck.
“Uh huh- oh fuck,” as he bites softly, tongue flicking out to lather at the spot.
Moving down, his lips press to your collarbone, then down your chest, until he places a peck to your nipple.
“I've been dreaming about these tits, but nothing can compare to the real thing,” his tongue darts out, swirling around the pebbled nub, sending goosebumps over your skin, “fuckin’ flawless sweetheart.”
You want to say a smart remark, shaking your head, but all thoughts fly out the window when he sucks, rough fingers reaching out to rub the other. Back arching, your legs clamp on his little waist, saying their own prayer to keep him there.
As he releases his mouth with a wet noise, the thoughts flood back, all barriers forgotten.
“I've been thinking about you too, what you'd do, what it looks like,” you admit, truths flying free in the heat of the moment.
“Yeah?” He smiles up at you, “been thinking about my dick?”
“Yeah, how'd it feel in my mouth, how'd it feel inside me,” you breathe out as he continues his worship of you, tonguing and kissing at your tummy.
“Fuck,” he says, hot air fanning over his wet string of loving kisses, “you're gonna kill me, saying shit like that.”
“Don't die, I'll never find out,” you joke, breathing unsteady as he falls between your thighs, playfully nipping at the sensitive flesh.
“Oh we wouldn't want that. How else could you know what this feels like?”
Lifting your head, he locks eyes with you as he licks thickly over your clothed clit, pressing hard.
“Oh Eddie, yes,” you wail, wriggling under his touch.
He merely smiles in response, hooking rough fingertips into the waistband of your panties and pulling them down almost torturously slowly. They stick between your legs so much that your cheeks flush. Eddie doesn't seem to mind in the slightest, working them off your feet and tossing them on his bedside table. You briefly wonder if you're going to get them back, but then his lips are sucking at the soft skin on your ankle and you stop caring.
Up, up, up he moves, showing each patch of skin just the same amount of love, until he reaches the crease where your thigh meets, tongue rippling over it. You huff in frustration, hips wiggling.
“I'm getting to it sweetheart,” he says, pressing a kiss to your mound, “I wanna savour this.”
Words of protest dissipate when he laps at you, rooting out your clit without a moment's hesitation. Any clandestine thoughts you had about this very moment are nothing compared to this. To the feel of Eddie sucking at your clit, his pillowy lips wrapped around it. To the sudden roughness of his fingers as they graze your entrance. To the breach of one, slipping deep inside of you, immediately seeking out your sweet spot.
“Eddie, ri-right there, oh God!”
He moans into you, vibrations tickling you in the most delicious way. It's an amazing feeling, but you can't help but think about the noises you're making. Maybe they're pathetic, and not what he's used to? You bet he's heard some beautiful moans in his time. Some pretty blonde things with long legs and big tits. Girls who know what they're doing. Oh God, what if you start feeling him up and he laughs at you? What if-
“Hey, sweetheart, you here?”
He gazes up at you between your legs, eyes boring into you with the question.
“Sorry, so sorry, I'm here I-”
“Hey. Don't apologise. You in your head?” He asks, head resting on your thigh, “you know we don't have to do this right now.”
“No, no I want to, honest, it's just- I dunno, second guessing myself? I'm just thinking about-”
“See? That's the problem. Stop thinking. Lie back and enjoy it. Just, get out of your head. No place I'd rather be.”
His brown eyes are wide, wet with honesty. He was never able to hide his real emotions, at least not with you.
“OK, I'm so- I'll enjoy it.”
“That's it. Close your eyes princess, and just feel.”
Eyes fluttering shut, you concentrate on the feel. Of his lips, suckling softly at your clit, tongue running around the hood. Then, fingers slipping inside once again, curling within you. Moans slither out of your hoarse throat as your hips roll up to meet his lips.
“That's it, so good for me,” he mumbles into you, “doing such a good job. You sound so sweet.”
Sweet. You sound sweet.
In that instant, all your hang ups begin to melt away. The pleasure he's giving you is hitting just right, making you forget all your worries. Pressure builds in your tummy; a whirling, winding force hitting you from the inside out. You're squirming, but it's as if someone outside of you is letting you know. It must be Eddie's firm palm, the one that presses into your abdomen, keeping you steady. Keeping you here, in this moment.
There's no rush. Time loses all meaning. He could be between your thighs for minutes, hours, days. All you know is the ball of desire tightening within you is fit to burst, bubbling over in a melting pot of raw emotion.
“Eddie, I'm so close, s-so close!”
He doesn't falter, doesn't deviate in his ministrations. He continues, tongue circling, fingers curling so deep inside you think you can see God. A swirling, cloying heat encapsulates you, winding around that feeling you buried in your heartstrings and tugging it loose. That deep emotion you pushed aside years ago, a healed splinter, set free by the love and care he's pouring out of his flowing tongue.
It reaches its crescendo, vision darkening as every nerve is coddled with an inner fire. You're not even sure what you feel; release, blinding pleasure, pure love? It could be all three as you cry out, fingers tugging at Eddie's hair.
He rides it out with you, fingers coaxing your orgasm to the very brink and beyond until you flop back into the bed.
The first clue you have that something different just happened is the wet feeling underneath your ass. It feels damp, and cold? Opening your eyes, you haul yourself onto your elbows to look down.
“Now are you glad I said about the towel?”
Never have you seen so much of your own release coated on a man. It's covering his mouth, chin, cheeks, hand. You briefly wonder at how it could have happened, how that much could have come out of you.
Eddie wipes his mouth and hand on the towel underneath and makes his way to hover over your heaving form, eyes practically shooting hearts at you from deep within.
“You alright princess? We can stop right now if it's too much.”
Blindly you reach out, clumsy fingers rubbing at the hard swelling of his member inside his underwear.
“Don't you want me to return the favour?” You ask, confused.
“Sweetheart, one kiss of those pretty lips on my dick and I'll be done for.”
“Then- I'm on birth control. Fuck me, please.”
The groan that he lets out is deep and guttural, moving his limbs for him. He gets up to whip his pants down and you see it for the first time. You see him.
It's big. Fuck, its the biggest you’ve seen; not just long but thick, even thicker than your fumblings thought. A glint of silver throws you for a loop, almost making you think you imagine it, but there it is again.
“Holy shit, Eddie- are you, pierced??”
“Oh yeah,” he chuckles, glancing down to follow your eye line, “you didn't know about that huh.”
He climbs on top of you, kissing as he goes, plush lips on your skin. Soft, delicate, and warm. Guiding his hardness to your opening, you can't help but rub your thumb over the tip, pre cum slipping on the balls of the piercing. Eddie's breath stutters, nearly panting in your mouth as you smirk.
“Now that's not fair sweetheart.”
You continue to smile, gathering your slick to slide him in, but it quickly turns into a wince.
“Fuck, Eddie, you're too big,” you whimper out as your eyes screw shut.
“You're fuckin’ flattering me princess.”
“I'm not, seriously, you're- oh goddamn-”
He's pushing into you, slowly, but it still burns, the sheer stretch at his girth almost too much. Gnawing at your lips, tears well in your eyes.
Eddie looks shocked, taken aback by your reaction.
“Really? Fuck, OK sweetheart, you're OK. Look at me, you can take it, yeah?”
Trust Eddie to say the hottest thing by accident. He's just trying to check in, but by God it sets your insides on fire.
“I-I'll try.”
“That's it, atta girl, little more.”
Reaching down to where you're joined, you wrap your hand loosely around the base, realising he's only halfway in.
“Eddie, jeez you could- oooh- you could have f-fucking warned me, ah!”
“Just relax, I've got you princess, you're taking it so well, you can take the rest- oh Jesus H Christ you're tight.”
A long drawn out cry echoes out of you as he bottoms out, tears loose and running down your temples. He's leaning on his elbows, fingers stroking at your hair, leaving snowflake kisses on your cheeks.
“Uh- mmmph- Eddie, you've got a pornstar dick.”
Gritting his teeth, he looks at you almost sternly.
“You can't say that or I'll cum right now, please.”
Eyes softening, you kiss his lips instead. He envelops you, tongue dancing in your mouth making you forget the dull ache. Nothing can make you forget how full you feel however, your pussy quivering uncontrollably around him even though he's not moving.
“This is so nice,” he says, entwining his fingers with yours over your head.
“Eddie, you're literally balls deep in me and it's ‘nice’?”
Laughing so hard you feel it in your chest, he kisses you again.
“Sorry, I mean, just being this close with you. It's everything I've ever wanted.”
Lips quivering, you stare at him, eyes wide and wet.
“Eddie, I lo-”
“No, don't. Not like this. Just- can I move?”
You nod, biting back the words, and he slowly rolls his hips. Eyes nearly hitting the back of your skull, you moan, meeting his movements. He's so deep, it's like he's everywhere. Every pore, every capillary, pulsing with him.
“Oh my God, baby, oh God!”
You're rambling words but it doesn't seem to matter, mind filled with fog, with feeling. With him. He links one arm under the fat of your thigh, coaxing you to curl it around him, and everything seems to fall into place all at once. Each rolling movement is pressing into that sweet spot inside of you, that spot he seems to find so easily like a gravitational pull. He smiles, panting in tandem.
“Right there princess?”
Nodding like a puppet on a string, he lets out a long groan.
“Good, I-I’m not gonna last, you feel too fuckin’ good.”
Pleased at his reaction, you link one arm around him, stroking at the taut skin of his back as he drives into you harder. Grunting with each thrust, he's tensing, holding back.
“You can come, Eddie,” you say shakily.
“Not before you sweetheart,” he replies, doubling down on his efforts.
It all feels so intense, each whirl of feeling sinking deep into your bones and fanning the flames of your heart and desire.
“Eddie, s-so close, come with me, please.”
Almost as soon as you say the words your climax springs out, overflowing with every emotion he won't let you say. It fizzes through your nerves, throbbing with each beat of your pulse.
Eddie groans, releasing at the same time, two bodies with one heart. As you both relax, melding together, you giggle at the same time. A laugh of relief, of pure happiness.
“Sorry, thought I'd last a little longer.”
He seems embarrassed, lifting his head enough to look you in the eye.
“Eddie, that was perfect.”
He snuggles his head deep in your neck, inhaling your scent as if it were the last time.
“I'm gonna get you cleaned up, hang on.”
Lifting his head once more, he kisses, and kisses, lips moving against you with pure feeling.
“OK, now I'm really gonna go.”
You giggle as he just keeps kissing you, staring up at him with each unspoken word swimming in your mind.
“Right, now, just hang on.”
With a final peck, he slips out of you, returning with a warm cloth. Not used to this affection you merely lay there, allowing him, and wriggle out of the way when he takes away the towel. When you move, you see there's still a wet patch, but it's been mitigated at least somewhat.
“I can change the sheets if you want-”
“Eddie, I don't care, just hold me.”
Grinning like a boy he climbs back into bed, pulling blankets over the both of you. Fitting together like you were always supposed to, you sigh with relief.
“Eddie? Can I say it now?”
You whisper it into his chest as he holds you close, almost afraid of breaking the spell of the evening.
“That depends sweetheart,” he says, fingers tracing unknown patterns on the skin of your arm, “you have to mean it. I couldn't take it if you didn't mean it.”
“I mean it. I love you Eddie, I think I always have.”
The smile in his voice makes you smile too.
“I love you too. Happy Valentine's Day."
Taglist
@liminalpebble @eddies-puppet @rip-quizilla @micheledawn1975 @vanilla-demon @millercontracting @roanniom @josephquinnsfreckles @leelei1980 @mrsjellymunson @usedtobecooler @eddiesprincess86 @ali-r3n @choke-me-eddie @littlebebebunny @big-ope-vibes
#ms gexy writes#eddie munson smut#eddie munson#eddie munson x reader#eddie munson x you#eddie munson fanfic#eddie x you#eddie x female reader#eddie munson x fem!reader#eddie x reader#eddie stranger things#stranger things fan fic#stranger things fanfiction#stranger things smut#eddie munson angst#eddie munson fluff
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even if it’s a false god — e.m.
part two; we'd still worship this love
pairing: modern!college!fboy eddie x fem!reader
warnings: smut!!!!!!, 18+, MINORS DNI or ill bite u. p in v, cr*ampie, kinda br*eding kink, unprotected s*x (wrap it up irl angels, this is fiction.), angst angst angst, ASSHOLE FBOY EDDIE!!!, drinking, degrading, swearing, praises, nicknames, vv slight ch*king kink if u squint, some rough stuff.
summary: in which you are friends with benefits with modern!fuckboy!eddie (wc:4.1k)
a/n: i was def thinking of a pt.2 for this while writing it tbh. mr asshole munson needs to repair some hearts!!! also i made the pic in the middle bc i couldn't find a fitting picture w this lyric lmaooo!! did not proof-read!! ignore any mistakes AND PLSS send me ur thoughts ily xo, em
“It was fun babysitting you, sweetheart, but I have to dip,” Steve whispered in your ear with a sympathetic smile, his hand pointing toward the blonde who was impatiently waiting for him.
“What?” You asked, baffled. “Steve, you fucking promised!” You groaned.
“Jesus Christ, do you not have any ounce of self-control?” He asked, and you gave him an intense look.
“Obviously not!” You huffed, arms crossing against your chest, causing Steve to chuckle.
“Robin will come back eventually! And in the mean time, just stay the fuck away from him,” He warned.
“Now, I gotta get laid.” He winked. You tried to open your mouth, but he interrupted. “I swear to god, Y/N, I don’t wanna hear another word from you, you’ve cockblocked me enough this week.” He said, annoyed.
You rolled your eyes, huffing as you stood straight, “Fine! Have fun.” You exclaimed, and Steve grinned, “I will, sweetheart. And you, just... hide from him or something.” He shrugged as he guided the blonde girl out of the door.
Jesus fucking Christ.
You were pathetic, asking for Steve and Robin to babysit you, so that you wouldn’t end up under Eddie again, so that you could at least save some of the self-respect that you were sure probably didn’t exist at this point.
They knew each time you said you were done with him, it was a lie. They knew you’d go back for more, but now it had been two weeks—two whole weeks—where you managed to stay away from him, blocking him for good.
And you could feel yourself cracking; you wanted—needed—him with every fiber of your being, and it was driving you crazy.
He drew you in with whatever he did, like a magnet always pulling you toward him, making you need to be around him, at all times.
You missed the way his hands grazed your thighs, the way he fucked you so rough and senselessly, but also so gently. The way his pretty mouth framed compliments so fucking sweetly, but turned dirty the moment he was pounding into you, praising you but degrading you at the same time.
He was so good at fucking, but was shit at everything else.
Just like you.
So the idea of being friends with benefits sounded like heaven when you first suggested it. No feelings attached, no exclusivity, just fucking each other's brains out while also having someone to chat with afterward.
It was supposed to be simple—so fucking simple.
But the moment feelings got involved, it turned out for the worst. Jealousy was a bitter monster that gnawed at the insides of the two of you, and it had turned into something so incredibly toxic that you knew you had to end it. Your friendship was long gone now, turning into a bitter competition where you either fucked or argued.
Exclusivity was not something the two of you ever discussed, you knew you were bad at relationships, and Eddie knew he wasn’t good at feelings, so it was a topic you always danced around. Arguments ensued the moment one of you fucked someone else, and bitterness was present in your veins like it had always been there.
When Eddie decided to fuck another girl two weeks ago, you decided you were done. This wasn’t good for the both of you, and you needed to stop it as fast as you could.
You knew the emptiness you felt right after you fucked was not worth it, no matter how good Eddie was.
You were tired of sobbing into Steve’s chest drunkenly, confused about what you even felt for Eddie when he was out there fucking another girl.
It was starting to leave a bad taste in your mouth, and you didn’t want to hate Eddie—not more than you already did at the moment.
But there stood Eddie, curly hair laid messily on his forehead as a guitar pick adorned his neck, his infamous leather jacket paired with those black pants were your nightmare—dream—combo, he was sprawled on the couch, thick thighs spread apart, you wished you could part them further with your hands, rub him through his pants as you got down on your knees for him, giving his delicious pink-tip kitten licks as you tasted his salty pre-cum—
What the fuck was wrong with you? You shook your head as you turned around immediately, gazing into your empty cup as you hurried off to the kitchen.
Your cheeks grew hot from embarrassment, you seriously had no fucking self-control or respect.
“You need any help?” Eddie’s voice rang in your ear.
“‘M fine,” You muttered, voice barely audible.
“You know I’ve been lookin’ for you.”
“Why? Did you finally run out of girls to fuck on campus?” You said snarkily, a smirk tugging on your lips.
“Don’t act so fuckin’ innocent now, sweetheart.” He tssked, causing you to throw him a quizzed look.
“Didn’t you go home with Mr. Jock last week?” He was being possessive again, and you hated how it picked up your heart rate, you were stupid.
“So?” You quirked a brow, teasing him, and he gave you a slight chuckle.
That smug asshole, why did he have to always look so good?
“So…how was it?” He asked, and you could feel his jaw tensing as he took a step closer to you, trapping you between the drink stand and his body.
“You’re disgusting.” You groaned as you pushed him away from your face. You were not going to give in.
“That bad, huh?” He mocked, scrunching his nose.
You rolled your eyes. “No.” You lied.
It was bad, really fucking bad; the guy lasted 30 seconds and left you with nothing. That greedy bastard.
But you weren’t going to let Eddie know that.
“He was really good, actually.” You were lying through your teeth, and thankfully, Eddie didn’t seem to notice. An intense rage flashed through his eyes.
“You sayin’ that punk is better than me?” He slurred into your ear, his breath ragged and hot as it fanned against your neck. He smelled so fucking addicting—a mix of sandalwood and nicotine, earthy and making you crave him at the same time.
You don’t even know how he even came to that conclusion, but it was funny, seeing him like this, nostrils flaring as rage filled his veins, like he was in torture hearing about the guys you fucked, he deserved that.
But your silence at his question meant everything to him; he didn’t need an answer. You knew he was better, and he knew that you were crawling closer to his palm now.
He grew more confident because of the way you stuck to him. “I've seen him in the locker room, sweetheart. He’s not that fuckin’ impressive.” You didn’t mean to gasp, but it slipped past your lips quickly.
“Munson!” You warned, a smile tugged on your lips, and you realized how pathetic you were being again, but it was too late now.
“Don’t think he can make you smile like I do, either.” He grinned smugly, his calloused hands quick to pull the strand of hair on your face, to see the way your eyes crinkled when you smiled, so fucking promising.
“You're a jerk,” You spat, groaning as you turned around, trying to avoid him, but it was no use; the damage was done, and you were putty in his hands again.
He had a tight hold on your arm, possessive again, and you were sick for enjoying his rough side. He spun you around to meet him, eyes dark, before he held you in place. “A jerk who makes you feel good,” Eddie purred in your ear, fingers tracing toward your exposed skin, one touch from him, and you whimpered, all that anger fading away so quickly.
He chuckled darkly. “Missed those sweet lil’ whimpers,” He whispered in your ear again, fingers quick to find their way toward your panties.
He drew slow circles with his thumb while you tried to remain tight-lipped, but it was impossible.
“Jesus—fuck, Eddie som—someone could see...” You didn’t mean to throw your head back against the wall. Your eyes fluttered shut, and Eddie shrugged.
“Don’t care, sweetheart.”
“Well, I do.” You didn’t; Eddie could fuck you right here, right now, and you’d be fine with it, but you weren’t ready to admit this to yourself, and you didn’t want to take the chance of Robin seeing you like this.
He groaned as he dragged you into the nearest room. You would’ve cried at the loss of contact if he didn’t have a tight hold on your body, calloused hands gripping at your curves, and your thighs rubbed together at his touch.
Eddie was quick to pin you against the door, his hand curling around the back of your neck. He smashed his lips against yours without hesitating, kissing you the same way he made you feel; explosive, hard, and dizzying.
He pulled back to look at you.
Sweet Jesus.
His gaze was intense, and it made you feel so fucking exposed that it startled a gasp out of your lips.
You fisted his shirt when you had enough, yanking him closer to you so that you could feel his body pressed into yours. Everything you felt was pure hunger, craving him deeply.
Your heart was pounding in your chest when you felt his rock hard bulge grinding against you, calloused hands gripped your ass as you whimpered; you were at his mercy now.
“What were you sayin’ last time? That this would never happen again?” He mocked, whispering against your face, his gaze never leaving you.
Your eyes narrowed, but it was impossible to keep up your act when his fingers started ghosting over your thighs again. “Fuck. You.” You spat.
“You don’t have to ask me twice, baby.” He grinned, chuckling when you whimpered under his touch.
“God, I love those sweet noises you make for me…” He murmured, you rubbed your thighs again at his words. “I bet if I flipped that little skirt of yours… I’d find you gushing for me.” He groaned.
And you remained tight-lipped. God, you didn’t want to feed into his huge fucking ego, and you wanted to wipe that smug smirk off his face.
But he was so right. Your thighs were dampened by how aroused you were.
He was quick to slip his fingers past your panties, a grunt escaping his lips once he pushed past your folds, your slick covering his fingers. He chuckled darkly. “You’re soaking my fingers, honey.”
“I—Fuck—I hate you.” You squeezed your eyes shut, and Eddie reveled in it, his fingers pushing inside of you while his thumb stayed on your clit.
“Always sayin’ shit you don’t mean, baby.” He mocked. “Gonna make you beg for my cock, if you keep’ talkin like that.”
You were panting and head dizzy as he pushed his fingers in and out of you. You were going to lose it, and he had barely started.
When he finally undressed both of you, you were out of it, while his hands were still on your clit as he groaned at the sight in front of him.
You were perfect.
His breath was ragged when he traced your chest, eyes bulging when he realized you had no bra on, pleasure ignited in you more and more when he cupped your breasts, teeth tugging your nipple as his fingers still toyed with your clit.
“Perfect tits, just made for me, huh?” He growled, making you mewl; you were putty in his hands, and with each movement, you were getting closer and closer to beg him for more.
The more you whimpered, the rougher he got with you, curling his finger inside your cunt as he hit that one spot, eliciting a moan from you as you threw your head back.
“P—please.” You whimpered, and Eddie tutted.
“I’ve seen you do much better than that.” He hummed. This arrogant asshole was going to be the death of you.
“P—please, Eds, please.” You begged, and your moans died down your throat, before he slowly dragged his fingers out and shoved them back in.
Your head cocked to the side in pleasure, and he was quick to take advantage of it, licking a path from your neck to your ear, grinning.
“Mhmm… not good enough, baby.” He purred in your ear as you whined, “Jesus fucking Christ—” Your cursing was interrupted when he yanked his hands away.
No. No. No. No!
“Shitshitshit—Please, Fuck, Eds...” You murmured, eyes shooting wide open, “Need your cock inside’a me.” You mewled again.
His dark chuckle reverberated through you, “See, that wasn’t that hard, was it?” He mocked, causing your eyes to narrow.
“You assho—” He didn’t let you finish as he wrapped his hands around your throat, just enough to punish you but just enough for pleasure to course through your veins. And it felt so fucking good.
You shut your mouth quickly, “What were you saying, baby?” He purred.
God, that egotistic prick was pushing you to your last fucking limit; you could do it, you could hold it off. But on the other hand, you could feel yourself pulsing with need; if he didn’t pound into you soon, you knew you would’ve been a pathetic blabbering mess.
“Please, please, Fuck me,” You grunted. “I need you, Eddie.” He didn’t respond as he tapped your thighs, signaling for you to wrap your legs around his chest, and you were quick to oblige.
Mind spinning before you got a chance to process what happened, he slammed into you with a vicious thrust, he was so fucking thick that it made you let out a guttural scream, tears welled at your eyes as you tried to adjust to his size.
It wasn’t long before your loud noises turned into incoherent babbles and squeals as he kept his pace.
“Holy shit, baby,” He groaned, watching his cock sliding into you, “Such a warm fuckin’ pussy, and so fucking tight… Jesus…”
You trembled beneath him, tits bouncing up and down as your mouth hung open each time he slid further into your cunt, and Eddie wanted that image etched into his brain forever.
He tilted you upward, hitting spots you weren’t even aware of. You were quick to wrap your hands around his frame, your nails digging into his back, roughly.
He was the only one who knew you like that; both emotionally and physically, and the same went for you, that’s why the two of you never could truly let each go, clinging to each other like a child did to their favorite toy.
You know no one else could fuck you like he did, and that smug bastard knew it, too.
The way he was pounding into you while uttering curses at your ear, furiously slapping into your body as if you were nothing but his personal fucktoy, truly his.
And you realized how sick you were for liking it, truly enjoying being this way with him.
“You look so fuckin’ pretty when you take my cock, such a tight fuckin’ pussy and all mine, yea?” He panted causing you to nod, you were barely able hold his gaze, and he groaned before his hands roughly grabbed your cheeks, forcing your head in his direction.
“Look at me baby…” He purred, “Look, how well your cunt is squeezin’ me. You feel that, peach?” He sheathed himself further into you, and you could feel your walls clench around him, a contented groan leaving both of your lips.
It was fucking perfect. Everything was rough and messy, there was nothing emotional about the way you fucked. You were both using each other to cum as much as you wanted to, not stopping until you were both sweaty bodies.
He could make you come apart in seconds if he wanted to, knowing your body better than anyone else. And you could make the scary freak Eddie putty in your hands if you wanted to; it was a fucked up game of control that had the two of you going at it for hours.
Was it fucked up? Yes.
Did it feel good? Absolutely.
“Would that asshole be able to make you come apart like this?” He asked, fingers digging into your hips, sure to leave a bruise.
This wasn’t the first time Eddie had been possessive; it was a sick, twisted game that you also participated in, almost as if both of you knew that you could never be with anyone else.
You nodded mindlessly, you weren’t going to give into him that easily, again, he grunted at your lack of reaction.
“Tell me, baby.” He growled, his pounding slowing down to make sure your orgasm was out of reach for you, torturing you until he had you begging under him.
You weren’t sure if you wanted to give up this fast. “Beg me, honey.” His movements picked up, and his hands were quick to toy with your clit, a sharp burst of euphoria rang through your body, leaving you speechless.
You clenched around him—a big fucking mistake—and he grinned smuggly again. “I know, baby, I know you’re close.” He panted. “I can make you cum, angel.” He promised, “Just say the word.”
“Asshole,” You groaned between his forceful thrusts, and he chuckled darkly. You rolled your hips against his when his movements faltered, seeking the warmth and the friction when he thrusted into you fully, filling you to the brim.
And that prick was thoroughly enjoying your torture. “Tell me it’s all mine, that you’re all mine.” He purred against your ear.
You couldn’t. You shouldn’t.
But the way his thumb circled around your clit, so agonizingly slow, and the way his cock was prodding into you so slowly was torture. God, if he just picked up his pace.
Don’t.
You try to convince yourself, but it's to no avail, you are clenching down on nothing, and it hurts. Your hole is pulsing now, and you need him more than ever.
“P—please,” You mewled, causing Eddie to give you a slight smirk. “Please what, baby? Use your words.”
“I’m all yours,” You murmured, “He could never fuck me like you could.” You added, humming contently, when Eddie started to pound into you relentlessly again.
“Please—I need to—Jesus, Eds.” Your words slurred into a moan as he increased his speed, his finger circling your clit roughly.
“Oh fuck, fuck, baby. Feels so good.” He panted. “Please—please make me cum, sir.” You sobbed, unable to hold it back anymore.
And that was all Eddie needed to hear. “Cum for me, honey.” He pleaded, and you gave him low whimpers as he started fucking you faster again, watching the way his cock disappeared into your gushing cunt.
“Wanna feel you cum on my cock, baby.” He breathed.
“Shit, feels so good, Eds.”
“Jesus—Please… I’m going to—” You bit down on your lower lip, unable to stifle the moans leaving your lips as his assault on your clit was enough to bring you over the edge,
“I’m gonna—I’m…Holy shit, oh god!” You sobbed, whole body convulsing in pleasure as you came around his cock, your vision blurred and mind foggy as you didn’t realize how your orgasm was triggering his.
Eddie was whimpering for you now, “So fucking good, holy shit.” He panted, movements getting sloppier.
“I’m gonna cum, fuck, baby. My perfect fucking girl, yea?” He heaved a breath.
“I’m gonna fuck this—Gonna fuck my load into you, peach.”
“Gonna fill you with my cum—Fuuuck.” He growled, animalistic noises escaping him as he exploded inside of you, thick ropes of his warm cum painting your walls.
He groaned when he slipped out, mouth-watering as he enjoyed the sight of you fucked out of your mind, and his load dripping down your thighs.
The relief you had was short-lived as that sinking feeling came to you again, the emptiness, the loneliness.
Was all of it worth it?
The two of you dressed in silence; the weight of what you did was hitting you all at once. You did it again. You had sex with him again. You let him use you again—it didn’t matter if you used him too, it meant something different for you than it did for him.
All those thoughts you had about feeling good faded out quicker than you thought they would.
You were so fucking pathetic.
Jesus Christ.
You felt sick, what the fuck did you just do?
As soon as Eddie got dressed, he gave your cheek a sloppy kiss. He was going to leave you all alone again.
You should be fine with this, this is what always happens.
Don’t—don’t say anything, just take your last bit of self-respect that is possibly non-existent and leave without another word—
“You’re…leaving?” You exhale, your mind racing with ideas.
Shit. Just shut the fuck up.
“Don’t act so coy now, sweetheart.” He gave you a slight smile, but all you wanted to do was slap it out of him.
“We both know what this was.” He muttered, that conceited dickhead still had that smile on his face.
“And what exactly was ‘this’?” You pointed to the space between the two of you.
“Fucking, no strings attached?” He added, shrugging. The fact that he had no clue about anything was pissing you off.
“Unbelievable.” You gave him a dry chuckle.
“What?” He asked, baffled.
“Is that all I am to you, just a warm body?” You said, face crinkling with disgust.
“I’m confused.” Eddie said. “You—you were the one who fucking suggested this.” He breathed.
“Well, I’m un-suggesting it!” You exclaimed angrily.
“You—you are so fucking confusing!” He spat. “I told you—I told you we could be more... told you we could try... us.” He stuttered. “You were the one who refused!”
“You were drunk! You can barely fucking say it now!” You spat back.
“What... what do you even want, Y/N?” He asked, holding his gaze.
“Do you want a relationship? Do you want something meaningful?” He pondered, a sarcastic chuckle escaping his lips.
“Is it so wrong for me to want that? To want something real?” Your voice carried so much emotion, and that’s what killed him.
He couldn’t have a relationship with you even if he wanted to; he recognized his own turmoil, and he feared he would drag you right down with him. No matter how similar you seemed to be, he was sure he’d ruin you, completely and utterly. And not in a good way.
He swallowed physically; the lump in his throat wasn’t going to go away.
He couldn’t let you have hope; he couldn’t let you down again—he had done that enough.
''A relationship with you is the last thing I see myself doing.'' He almost whispered, but you heard it loud and clear.
Your brows were quick to furrow, and your jaw was was set in a tense manner. The lust in your gaze was long gone by now, containing only rage while you glared at the source of your pain.
“Fuck. You.” You spat, tears threatening to spill but you didn’t want to give him that satisfaction
“You are a sadistic fucking asshole, Munson.”
“Jesus… I think we should stop—whatever the hell, this is.” He exclaimed.
“Fine by me!” You exclaimed back cheeks heating up from anger.
“I really am done with you, this time.” Despite the intensity of your gaze, he could sense the subtle vulnerability in your eyes. The subtle pain that was fueling your anger
“Oh, I’m sure you are.” He chuckled smugly. This was something you two had joked about before, but it wasn’t funny now.
He saw you in the palm of his hand because you always came back to him, he was right… until now.
The fact that he laughed in your face at the thought of being in a relationship with you was too much, even for your low self-esteem.
“I don’t care what you think.” You didn’t even hold the rage you held before; only disgust was visible in your tone.
“You’re dead to me.” You replied curtly, your voice distant and chilling.
And Eddie knew how much he fucked up, truly.
There was nothing he could do now.
“I didn’t mean it like—” He regretted what he said immediately, but you dismissed his protests, gathering your jacket in your hand as you slammed the door behind you.
Tears blurred your vision as soon as you left, the lively sound of the party clouded your mind as you silently sobbed, trying to find Robin.
You knew how unattainable he was, and how much he truly hurt you, and as fucked up as it was, that's exactly why you loved him; led by blind faith that it would be different.
#eddie munson x reader#eddie munson imagine#eddie munson fic#eddie munson smut#eddie munson x you#eddie munson x y/n#fuckboy!eddie munson#modern!eddie munson x reader#fuckboy!eddie munson x reader#eddie munson angst#stranger things imagine#eddie munson
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Every Single Day
Pairing: Spencer Reid x Female Reader
Synopsis: When his daughter demands him to tell the story of how the two of you met, Spencer can't help but oblige.
Warning(s): dad spencer🥰, established relationship (eventually), parent-child relationships, alcohol consumption, brief interaction with a douchebag, made-up astronomy facts, made-up places, idk if there's any cursing but I'll throw it in here to be safe, implications of sex and nsfw themes (minors be advised), pregnancy, mentions of illness, mentions and/or implications of character death, topics of loss and grief, angst and fluff because I love the best of both worlds👍 (pls lmk if I missed anything)
Word Count: 7700-ish
Author's Note: hi 👋 I'm back again with another dad!spencer fic bc apparently I'm a sucker for him. I got a lil carried away with this one lol but anyways, I'm also writing this for the meet cute challenge hosted by the amazing and talented @imagining-in-the-margins so pls go head to her profile and show some love cause she's a peach ❤️ don't forget to leave a LIKE+COMMENT+REBLOG
Criminal Minds Masterlist
The air smelled of freshly brewed coffee. Against the wind, shades of crimson and orange swayed on the trees. Fallen leaves crunched underneath his feet to the cadence of his leisured steps.
Two deep breaths, in and out. Spencer Reid greeted autumn with the deep longing of an old friend.
Next to him walked a source of light bigger than the sun, jumping and bouncing excitedly on the sidewalk. Her tiny fingers emitted warmth inside of his hand. There was a skip to her step that reminded him of the innocence he had long lost. The innocence she now possessed.
Spencer loved this little girl beyond everything he had ever known.
"Puddle, Dee."
The tiny bundle of joy jumped to escape the small pool of water, grinning up at her father, who then began ruffling her hair until she evaded his onslaught with a shriek.
"Daddy?"
"Yes, Pumpkin?"
"You never told me how you met Mommy."
Spencer glanced down at the 6-year-old, dressed gorgeously in her favorite floral dress, complete with a sweater that had entailed a hearty discussion about humans' perception of cold. It was only after he bribed her with the promise of a chocolate cupcake from Wakey Bakey did Spencer finally convince her to wear the woolen piece of clothing.
His daughter stared at him with a radiant smile peeking out behind a curtain of hair. A smile which Spencer always argued had belonged to you, even though the rest of Diana Aurora Reid was the splitting image of her beloved father.
"Surely I've told you before, Dee."
"Nuh-uh."
"Of course I have."
"No, Daddy. You haven't."
"Pumpkin, you know I don't forget stuff ever," Spencer said, looking at the little girl who was swaying along to the rhythm of her footsteps. "I used to tell you that story all the time. Back when you were still a baby."
Just as predicted, Diana let out a dramatic gasp as if Spencer had uttered the most offensive thing known to mankind; like claiming the earth was actually flat, for example. Spencer couldn't contain his grin upon seeing her reaction.
"But Daddy, that was so long ago!"
"Do you not remember, Dee?"
Diana shook her head.
"Fine. But Mommy must've told you the story already, right?"
"She has, but--"
"But?"
"But I wanna hear it from you."
Little Diana knew that her father could never resist her puppy dog eyes, especially garnished with that adorable pout on top. Once upon a time, you declared it sickeningly cute and annoying whenever Spencer would pull the same trick on you. When Dee started doing the same to him, you had simply laughed and kissed his cheek, letting him get a sweet taste of his own medicine.
Spencer smiled at the young girl next to him, squeezing her nose and relishing in the gleeful squeal that echoed from her chest.
"What do you wanna hear, Pumpkin?"
Diana held her chin, seemingly deep in contemplation before deciding, "Everything, Dad! I wanna hear it from the start."
"The start, huh?" Spencer hummed thoughtfully, his mind already reeling back to the first moment he ever laid eyes on you.
The story began on yet another ordinary Friday night.
Luck was on the BAU's side when the team managed to wrap the case they had been working all week just before Friday afternoon. By the time the sun was setting, their jet was already high up in the sky, en route from the state of Delaware to Quantico, Virginia. Spencer was looking forward to going home at a reasonable hour for once--maybe catching up on the four reading materials he had promptly pushed aside after his team was called to Delaware to work on the latest case--but that plan dissipated when Derek Morgan suddenly appeared by his side.
"Drinks. Tonight. Everyone's coming, and I'm not taking no for an answer," Derek said before dragging a reluctant Spencer away with him, ignoring the protests that the younger man kept grumbling under his breath all the way to the team's favorite bar.
Spencer just hadn't known it yet, but later down the road, he would spend the rest of eternity thanking Derek Morgan for dragging him along that night.
The Friday night crowd at Shaw's was borderline brutal, but fortunately for the team, a booth in the corner became vacant the moment they stepped into the threshold.
Two hours later, Spencer's fellow teammates weren't even close to calling it a night. The last chorus of "I Wanna Dance with Somebody" by Whitney Houston had just finished blasting from the speakers when Derek sauntered back to the booth, twirling a flushed Penelope Garcia in front of him. Spencer slipped out of the booth to allow them in--preferring to stay on the most outer seat instead of crammed between his tipsy friends' bodies--before sitting down once more.
"Hey, Genius," Penelope called, waving her empty beer glass in front of Spencer's face. "Be a darling and get me a refill, will you?"
"Garcia--" Spencer quickly snatched the glass from her hand before she could send it smashing against someone's head, "--are you sure you want a refill?"
Penelope scrunched her nose. "Why do you ask?"
"Because I think you're plenty drunk already."
"I'm not that drunk," Penelope denied, giggling when an unexpected hiccup interrupted her slurred words. "Derek, tell the beautiful Doctor I'm not that drunk."
"She's not that drunk, Reid." Derek grinned. "While you're at it..."
Spencer could only sigh when Derek slid his own empty glass across the table.
It was past 10 o'clock at night, and the crowd of people in the establishment seemed to have doubled in the couple of hours that the team had been there. Spencer had to squeeze himself through the ocean of patrons flooding the bar, barely able to move his limbs without other people's arms or elbows bumping against his ribcage.
Spencer was waiting for the bartender to complete his order when he happened to glance towards his right, catching sight of the concealed panic that triggered every profiler bone in his body.
Any other person would have taken one look at your face and presumed that everything was alright, but Spencer knew better. He recognized the frantic movement of your eyes, the tight press of your lips, and the impatient knocking of your fingertips on the counter. He only caught the tail end of your voice before discreetly listening to what the man you were talking to had to say.
"--so, unfortunately, I can't."
"I told you, Baby. My Veyron runs at over 260 miles per hour. We can go to Red Clover Hill and get you back home safely by twelve. It's simple math," the guy slurred smugly.
"Actually, that's not true."
The drunken man turned around at Spencer's interruption.
"Excuse me?"
"The Red Clover Hill State Park is approximately 229 miles away from here. Though theoretically, you could drive your Veyron at its maximum velocity, which is around 268 miles per hour, it's very unlikely you'll be able to maintain that speed for the entirety of the ride, considering the terrain you would have to go through between here and there. The fastest you can probably get to the park is in 60 minutes, give or take, and that's being generous. You would have to drive back to D.C. as soon as you arrive at the park if you wish to be back by twelve. It's just realistically impossible."
The man in front of him couldn't be less impressed by Spencer's lengthy rant.
"And who the hell are you?" the drunken guy said, pinning Spencer with a stare that was clearly supposed to be intimidating.
Spencer didn't even flinch. "No one. Just a guy who happens to know a lot about... simple math."
Your loud cough tore Spencer's attention away from the drunk man and towards you, who looked ready to burst from the laughter you were holding underneath. Even under the terrible lighting of the bar, Spencer could still pinpoint the hint of unspoken amusement glimmering inside your eyes.
"Sorry, Bill," you said to the man. "I really do need to be back home by twelve tonight. Maybe some other time?"
Bill didn't need to be told twice. He received the message loud and clear.
Spencer watched the other man scurry away, tail between his legs, before your charming smile enraptured him once more.
"Thank you for that. I was beginning to think he might never leave."
"Happy to help." Spencer smiled thinly, scratching the back of his neck even though the spot wasn't itchy. "What did, uh, why did he want to take you to Red Clover Hill, of all places?"
"Oh. That was... partially my fault." You grinned innocently. "I didn't know he was gonna be an insufferable drunk when he came over, and I was in the middle of watching this."
You pulled out a silver tablet from your lap. Spencer took a peek at the screen, seeing what looked like a live feed of the night sky--over North Carolina, judging by the visible constellations on the vast scene--stamped with the day's date at the bottom of the footage.
"You're watching the Roux-Nell?" Spencer deduced after gathering the facts: the live feed of North Carolina sky, the mention of Red Clover Hill State Park that harbored one of the highest grounds in North Carolina, including a collection of some of the most sophisticated telescopes in the country; you must have been planning to view that night's sighting of the Roux-Nell comet, its first time since the last one in 1927, and only its third one in history.
"Yes! How did you... don't tell me. You're an avid astronomy fan, too?"
Spencer's responding smile only made you beam even brighter.
"Anyway, that guy earlier, Bill, he approached me and asked what I was watching. So, I started talking about the Roux-Nell and about how I wish I was at Red Clover Hill right now since everyone keeps saying it's one of the best spots to view tonight's sighting. I thought he was genuinely interested until he started talking about his Veyron this, his Veyron that. I didn't even realize until a whole five minutes later that he was talking about his car!"
When you finally finished explaining, your eyes locked with Spencer's hazel ones before you seemed to cower shyly.
"Sorry. I can get a little excited when I'm talking sometimes."
"No! Don't be, it was--" Spencer stopped himself before he could complete his sentence.
What was he about to say?
Insightful? Entertaining?
Endearing?
Eventually, Spencer opted to settle for something safe and simple. "I get that way too, sometimes. A lot of the times, actually. So you don't have to apologize."
The fire flickered back inside your gaze following Spencer's admission. It burned brilliantly beneath the kindness you radiated, forged by the sharp intelligence he could see shining out of your eyes.
"So--" Spencer cleared his throat, attempting to shift the conversation in order to distract his racing mind, "--why did you tell him you needed to be back home by twelve?"
"Oh, that? I told him I'm donating blood tomorrow morning, so I need to at least get seven hours of sleep for the night."
"That's a clever lie."
You tilted your head slightly at his statement. "What makes you think it's a lie?"
"Because you're here. Nobody drinks alcohol before they're supposed to donate blood."
Your eyes flashed with surprise. "Not bad, Mister. You're very perceptive."
Spencer shrugged, trying not to appear too flustered by your casual compliment. "It's what I do."
You raised an inquisitive eyebrow at his reply.
"I'm a profiler."
"Profiler?"
"With the FBI."
"FBI, huh?" You hummed, something akin to intrigue swirling in your eyes. "So, you study criminals? Trying to decipher their way of thinking, why they do what they do. Dissect their past history for any related trauma, maybe even pinpoint a psychological stressor that could trigger a criminal behavior, that kind of stuff?"
Upon hearing your response, it was Spencer's turn to be intrigued. "Exactly that kind of stuff. How did you...?"
Grinning sheepishly, you pulled a professional badge out of your pocket, holding it up in front of Spencer so he could see the emblem covering its surface.
"Edgewater Psychology Center," Spencer read the words aloud, understanding dawning on him as he found your eyes once more. "You're a psychologist."
"Guilty as charged."
Spencer couldn't fight off his amused smile. "That explains it, then."
"You know," you began, leaning further against the bar counter to shorten the distance between you and Spencer, "I've never met a profiler in person before. Most of my colleagues, they have consulted on a federal case at least once in the past few years, but the bureau hasn't yet contacted me so far."
"Really?" Spencer took a step forward, closing the distance by a mere inch. "Sounds like a big loss for us. We're idiots."
You bit down on your bottom lip to suppress a smile, your gaze flicking between Spencer's own lips and eyes. For the shortest of minutes, nothing else existed in Spencer's world but you; your smile, your scent, and your kind eyes. You were a magnet carved out of his wildest dreams, and Spencer, well, he might as well have been made out of the purest of irons.
But before Spencer could get lost deeper in your relentless gaze, a shout of his name slashed through the air from across the bar. Back at the booth, Derek was waving his hand frantically in the air, stopping only when Spencer signaled him to sit back down and that he was returning in a minute.
"I have to go." He smiled tentatively, apologetically.
"Oh?"
Spencer tried not to revel too much over the small dip of disappointment at the edge of your voice.
"My friends. They, uh--"
"Oh, no, it's alright. You don't have to explain," you told him gently. "See you around, Mr. Profiler. Hope you have a great night."
With that said, you went back to watching the live feed on your tablet while Spencer, begrudgingly, trudged across the room with two refilled beer glasses in his hands, back to where his friends--minus Rossi and Hotch who were conversing among themselves at one of the standing tables--were waiting.
"Finally," Derek groaned once Spencer slammed the glasses down on the table.
"Who was that?" Emily asked as he slipped into the booth.
"Huh?" Spencer followed Emily's gaze, finding you perched up at the very end of it. "No one."
"No one?" Emily's eyebrows rose. "She didn't seem like no one from where I was sitting."
Spencer took an insanely large sip of his leftover beer.
"Holy shit, you like her, " Derek muttered. "He likes her. Pretty boy's got a crush."
"No, I don't."
"Yeah? Tell that to those red cheeks of yours." JJ chuckled.
Instinctively, Spencer touched his own cheeks as if he could physically feel the change of colors on his skin.
"I'm just tipsy," he tried to reason.
A collective scoff reverberated through the entire booth.
"What's her name, Spence?" JJ asked.
When a full minute ticked by without so much as a grunt of acknowledgment from Spencer, Penelope reached out and slapped the man right across his shoulder.
"Ow!"
"You didn't ask for her name?!" Penelope exclaimed.
"It didn't come up!"
"That's the stupidest thing I've ever heard you say, Reid," Emily noted before sipping her margarita.
"Nope. I'm not having this. Not tonight. Look at me, Sunshine." Penelope grabbed Spencer's face in her hands, forcing him to stare directly into her glasses-rimmed eyes. "I'm not letting you spend the rest of the night like this. You will get your cute little tushy out there and talk to that girl. You will get her name and also her number, maybe even ask the nice pretty lady out while you're at it. Now, have I made myself clear?"
Spencer barely managed to swallow his nerves before he offered Penelope two tiny nods.
"Good. I don't wanna see your face back here if you're not at least pocketing her phone number. Now shoo."
Penelope sent Spencer flying across the bar with a dramatic stumble. By the time he reached your side, Spencer was nothing less than a stuttering mess and a thundering heart.
"Hi," Spencer breathed out once he found your welcoming eyes.
"Um, hi?"
"I'm Spencer."
"Okay... Spencer?"
"Reid. Spencer Reid." He cleared his throat. "Sorry, it's just... I realized while I was sitting over there--well, my friends actually made me realize--that I, uh, never got your name. Which, you know, of course I never got it because I didn't ask. So, I was coming here, wondering if maybe you'd like to give it... to me?"
You blinked once. Twice.
By the third blink, Spencer wished the earth would open up and devour him whole.
"You want my name?"
Spencer nodded.
"What are you planning to do with it?"
"Call you?" At your bemused expression, Spencer quickly elaborated, "Not call like call. I meant referring. Yep. That's it. Although, maybe if you want to, I would love to call you as well. Sometime. And perhaps, you know, ask you out... on a date?"
Spencer swallowed the lump of nervousness in his throat. In front of him, you were pretty, even with the conspicuous scrutiny in your eyes as they assessed Spencer as if he was some sort of an enigma. Embarrassment burned hotter through his veins with every second that passed by. He was merely two exhales of breath away from dashing out of the door when you finally spoke up.
"Okay."
"Okay?"
Smiling, you produced an old receipt seemingly out of thin air and asked the bartender to lend you a pen, scribbling something down as soon as you had it between your fingers. When the tiny piece of paper emigrated to Spencer's hand, the Cheshire cat in him jumped out once he noticed the ten digit numbers written neatly underneath a name he could only assume as yours.
"Will that be enough, Spencer Reid?"
"For now," Spencer replied before grabbing his wallet and shoving the paper containing your name inside. "I'll call you."
"You better."
After Spencer's departure, you returned your attention back to the tablet in front of you. Barely five minutes later, though, your serene watching session was once again interrupted. Only this time, it was by the ringing of your phone.
"Hello?"
"Hi, this is Spencer."*
Surprised, you swiveled your head left and right, stopping once you spotted Spencer standing on the other side of the room. His eyes were trained towards you, and behind him, a booth of four people seemed to have directed their attention at you as well.
"Spencer?"
"I know this is very untoward," he began, "but would you like to go out with me?"
"Boy, you certainly don't waste any time at all, do you?"
"I believe it's called being efficient," he countered, making you laugh. "So, what do you say?"
"Sure," you answered, enjoying the way Spencer beam at you from across the room. "I would love to, Spencer."
A breeze blew gently against Spencer's face, caressing the tendrils of curly hair that had fallen over his forehead. Diana's little fingers started to grip his tighter as the wind strengthened.
"Did you take Mommy on that date, Daddy?"
"Of course," Spencer replied, reminiscing the exact day when he had picked you up in your apartment, sweat glistening on his palm as he clutched the bouquet of flowers in his right hand. "We went to see a Mark Rothko exhibition at the National Gallery of Art, and before I took her home, we stopped by Wakey Bakey to buy some lemon tarts."
Diana gasped. "Wakey Bakey?!"
The little girl's reaction compelled a chuckle from Spencer's chest. "Yes, Pumpkin. Wakey Bakey."
"What happened after that, Daddy?"
"What do you think happened after that, Dee?"
"Um--" Diana pursed her lips, deeply lost in thought, "--did you become girlfriend and boyfriend?"
"Yes, we did."
"And you got married?!"
Spencer laughed at Diana's apparent excitement over the prospect of her parents getting married. "We did, yeah, eventually. After I proposed to her."
"Oh! Oh! The proposal!" Diana exclaimed, jumping up and down in the middle of the sidewalk without a care in the world. Spencer had to tug her back towards him before she could harm herself or the other pedestrians. "Tell me! Tell me! Tell me about the proposal, Daddy!"
"You wanna hear the story about how I proposed to your mother?"
"Yes, please!"
Chuckling to himself, Spencer mumbled a quick fine before his gears had started turning towards a specific memory in his mind. Spencer was sure, even without his eidetic ability, there was no way he could have ever forgotten about the day in question.
The day you agreed to have him as your forever.
Spencer had fallen in love with you during the first date, right around the time of yet another one of his animated ramblings, where instead of shaming him to shut the hell up, you had simply stared at him in awe and said, "You're pretty when you talk."
The young agent was sure he couldn't get rid of the blush adorning his cheeks for at least an entire week.
By the time the fifth date rolled around, Spencer was absolutely certain that you were the one he wanted to spend the rest of his life with. It wasn't a surprise, then, that a few weeks before your first anniversary came up, Spencer had pocketed a diamond ring with a promise of forever on the tip of his tongue.
Combing the courage to take this historical leap was easy. Difficult was trying to conjure up the perfect proposal plan that he would deem worthy enough for someone like you. There were no rooms for mistakes. Spencer wanted everything to be perfect because he believed you deserved nothing less.
Which was why, in moments of desperation, Spencer ended up turning to his fellow teammates in the FBI for help.
"I don't know if I'm the right person to ask about this, Spence. Will only ever proposed to me after finding out about Henry, and we only got married after I thought he was gonna die on the field," JJ explained. "It was never the most ideal of situations, but I would never change a thing even if I could."
Unsatisfied with JJ's answer, Spencer proceeded to find the BAU's tech genius in her bat cave.
"Go big or go home, my friend," Penelope said following a 10-minute hysteria she erupted into upon learning about Spencer's intent to propose. "Splash out on the bottle. Don't hold back on the grandeur. Spend all of your savings if you have to."
"Garcia--"
"Fine, maybe not all of your savings. You should leave some for the wedding."
Spencer spent weeks mulling over Penelope's advice.
Working as an FBI agent didn't pay as well as most people thought it would, and Spencer's tendency to collect first edition books wasn't exactly an affordable hobby. It meant that as much as Spencer wanted a proposal filled with the greatest grandeur--just as Penelope had suggested--he didn't have a fat enough balance in his bank account to make his ideal proposal concept a reality.
And Spencer probably would have spent the limited fund in his savings down to its very last cent, had it not been for Derek catching him browsing through the internet for the cost of a hot air balloon ride.
"I just want to give her the perfect proposal," Spencer admitted after he finished revealing everything.
"Kid, it doesn't matter," Derek said. "Don't you see? She doesn't care about hot air balloons or any kind of grandeur. She only cares about you. There's no such thing as a perfect proposal. You're just using it as an excuse to put off asking her 'cause you're scared of what she's gonna say. But you don't need to. You two are so devastatingly in love, it's disgusting."
In the end, grandeur wasn't even present in the room when Spencer decided to pop the question.
On that particular night, Spencer arrived in his apartment just a few minutes before midnight. His aching muscles were calling for sleep as he toed his shoes off, but his footsteps soon ceased when he caught sight of his dimly lit living room.
You were fast asleep on the couch, face illuminated by the television light. Spencer's movements were careful as he knelt in front of you, studying the soft and hard edges of your features like historians would an ancient scripture. He couldn't help it when his fingers reached out on their own accord, brushing the softest of touches against the high point of your cheekbone. Inside its cage, Spencer's heart started to stir.
You were so beautiful.
Even after one year of being together, Spencer was often still taken back by how lovely you were. He adored every detail of your being, most fervently the scars that littered your skin in a constellation of stars. All of the places in your body where your scrutiny had wandered in a fleet of insecurity were the same places that Spencer wanted to worship for the rest of his life. In his eyes, you were eternally magnificent, and this thought clouded Spencer's mind as he went to shake your shoulder gently.
"Spencer?" Your groggy voice sounded meek in the comfort of Spencer's apartment, the same one he had been sharing with you since you moved in three months prior. Your lips tilted with the tiniest hint of a smile at the sight of him, and Spencer thought he would melt when your fingers instinctively reached for his face. "You're back."
"I'm back," he confirmed, leaving a trail of kisses on your palm. "Why aren't you in bed, my love?"
"I was waiting for you," you admitted. "I have something to say."
"Really? Me too."
"Hm?" Curiosity flared in the center of your eyes. "You first."
Smiling, Spencer leaned down to steal a quick kiss before saying, "Marry me."
Your breath hitched.
After a few seconds of silence, your nervous laughter filled his ears. "Right. That's a nice one, Spencer. Very funny."
"I'm not joking, sweetheart."
Spencer reached into the inside pocket of his satchel, pulling out the velvet box that had weighed down his bag by several grams for the past few weeks. Any remnant of sleep you still had in your eyes was instantly washed away the moment he opened the box to reveal a pretty ring sitting inside.
"I've had this for a while now," Spencer admitted. "I kept putting off asking you because I believed I wanted everything to be perfect, until Derek knocked some sense into my head and made me realize that I was just afraid of taking the leap. He's right, as always, but don't tell him I said that."
Spencer paused at your teary laugh, relishing in the melodic sound that made his heart nearly burst in two. "My love, I don't need the perfect proposal when you're the promise of a perfect life. Any life with you is the one I want to live for the rest of my time, and I want to start living that life from this point onward. What do you say, sweetheart? Will you marry me?"
Spencer never thought the word yes could sound so incredibly spectacular.
The celebration had started right away, commemorated by the shedding of clothes from each other's bodies, finalized by panting breaths and entangled limbs beneath rumpled sheets. You lay on the bed with your palm on Spencer's chest, his own hand tracing invisible patterns on the vast canvass of your skin.
Spencer watched as you stared at the ring circling your finger. "Do you like it? We can exchange it for a new one if--"
"Spencer Reid, don't you dare."
"Apologies, ma'am." He grinned, continuing the random patterns he was drawing on your skin before he spoke again, "By the way, you said you also have something to tell me."
You looked up at him with a blinding smile before scooting out of Spencer's arm and reaching for the nightstand. When Spencer saw what you had rummaged out of the bedside drawer, Spencer thought his heart had forgotten how to beat.
"Is that--"
"Surprise," you murmured giddily, handing over the object in your hand into Spencer's awaiting palm. "I found out yesterday, but I wanted to tell you in person."
Spencer sat up on the bed, staring with disbelief at the small item in his hand. He only realized he had started to cry when a drop of tears fell down, blurring the two tiny pink lines in his vision.
"This is... you're..."
"I'm pregnant, Spencer," you professed.
Just an hour earlier, Spencer thought the word yes was the best thing he could ever hear falling from your mouth. But as he held you in his arms, his lips catching yours once more in a heated kiss, Spencer realized that you had many more surprising admissions waiting to be said out loud.
And Spencer couldn't wait to spend the rest of his life listening to every single one of them.
"Daddy, are you saying I was already in Mommy's belly when you proposed to her?"
"Yes, you were, Pumpkin," Spencer said, smiling at the blatant curiosity in Little Dee's eyes. "You were a surprise we didn't see coming."
Diana's responding smile was a picture of satisfaction. The father-daughter pair continued to walk down the street until Dee's voice tore through the silence once again, "Daddy?"
"Hm?"
"I thought you said a man and a woman can only make babies after they're married."
Spencer's footsteps halted on the pavement.
The silence must have stretched for only a partial of a minute, but the expectant stare Dee was nailing against his face, along with the internal panic that had short-circuited Spencer's brain made it seem as if the world had skidded into a standstill. Frantic eyes darted everywhere for a chance at rectification, and Spencer couldn't stop the words from tumbling off his lips when he saw the worn-down sign of a florist up ahead.
"Dee, would you like to buy some flowers for Mommy?"
The little girl squealed an excited yes before skipping the few steps left towards the flower shop. Spencer let out a relieved breath at having narrowly escaped such a harrowing crisis.
Once Spencer stepped into the shop, a multitude of fragrances immediately enveloped his surroundings. Diana was lingering back and forth around the vibrant displays when Spencer approached, her tiny eyebrows frowning in the most adorable way as she assessed the rows of flowers in front of her.
"Have you decided yet, Pumpkin?"
"Can we get some of Mommy's favorites, Dad?" Diana requested, pointing her tiny finger at the display of flowers she knew to be your favorites. "And then we can add some of these daisies, too!"
Spencer couldn't fight the smile blossoming on his face as he asked the florist to assemble a bouquet made out of daisies--Dee's favorite type of flowers, the same one printed all over the dress she was wearing--along with your favorite flowers in the center. Diana stared in awe at the deft work administered by the florist, her mouth forming an "O" once the bouquet was wrapped and ready to go.
"Do you think Mommy will like them, Daddy?"
"I know she will, Pumpkin," Spencer answered earnestly, his memory replaying that first time he had come home bringing the same arrangement of flowers in his hand.
Spencer came home to the apartment in utter disarray, and yet, it still was the best view that he had ever witnessed in his entire life.
Ever since his office was transformed into a nursery, the books he previously kept in there had to be relocated to the living area. Most of them had gone by now--some donated, and some others sold at second-hand bookstores--but piles of them still littered in various corners of the room.
Apart from his mountainous collection of books, small trinkets also covered every available surface of the place. From the empty nursing bottles in the kitchen sink to the breast pump on the counter, and the tiny socks on the coffee table to the pacifier jammed between the sofa cushions; every single one of them contributed to the mess that his apartment had become. Yet as he paused to inspect every inch of the place, Spencer couldn't find any other emotion besides warmth flooding his chest.
Muffled footsteps padded towards the living room before you appeared from the hallway with a freshly bathed Diana in your arms. As soon as your eyes locked with his, the crease between your eyebrows automatically vanished.
"You're home."
"I'm home." Spencer grinned before welcoming you into his embrace.
He stole a quick kiss from your lips before bending down to smother a 7-month-old Diana who yelped in glee when Spencer began attacking her with kisses all over her face.
"She's been fussy since yesterday," you told him. "I think she missed you."
"Did you, baby? Did you miss Daddy?" Spencer cooed. "I can take her for a few while you rest. You look tired. Are you feeling okay?"
"Gee, Spence. What a way to a girl's heart."
"You know what I meant, sweetheart."
"It's fine, Spencer. I just got a headache, but it's all better now that you're here."
Spencer smiled as he kissed your free knuckles. "If it's any consolation, you're still the most heavenly creature that I've ever laid eyes upon."
A sneaky laughter rumbled past your chest. "Fine. I'll let you go just this once," you said before letting Spencer take a yawning Diana into his arms.
As Spencer carried Dee towards the couch, you noticed a bouquet of flowers lying next to the kitchen sink in the corner of your eye. You glanced at the young genius with a discreet smile before aptly transferring the flowers into a vase.
"These are pretty," you commented, joining your family in the living room. You put the vase in the middle of the coffee table amidst the books and various baby clutters before dropping yourself against Spencer's side.
"They're your favorites."
"I know. As usual." You smiled affectionately. "And daisies. You've never bought me daisies before."
Spencer's eyes gleamed. "I bought the daisies for Dee."
"Oh?"
"I think daisies are gonna be her favorite."
"You do, huh?"
"One hundred percent."
Spencer's eyes looked up from Diana to you then, whose own gaze had been kept intently on your husband and daughter. Darkness embellished the area underneath your eyes, and Spencer couldn't help but count the lines of fatigue that seemed to have multiplied on the contours of your face. Even then, Spencer thought you had never looked more stunning than you did at that moment; as his wife, the mother of his child, and the woman who owned the sole reign of his heart.
Confusion wandered into your eyes when you noticed Spencer's stubborn stare. A surprised squawk escaped your lips as Spencer unexpectedly captured them in a rather long kiss. When he pulled back, Spencer looked the very image of a man who was drunk on love.
"I love you. You know that, right?" Spencer confessed as he squeezed your hand twice in his palm.
"Spencer, what's going on with you?"
"Nothing. I just--" he paused for a chuckle, seemingly trying to find the right words to say before he could continue, "--I owe my life to you, sweetheart. For all of the times you have pulled me out of the darkness, to the light you've brought into my life. You and Dee are the reason I keep on breathing. Without the two of you, I'm nothing."
"Spencer," you breathed out. "Where did all of this come from?"
"I don't know." He shook his head. "I just wanted you to know how grateful I am to have you in my life and that you've brought Dee into ours. Everything worth fighting for about me is because of you."
The telltale signs of tears began to cast a shadow over your eyes. You pressed your hand to Spencer's cheek, feeling the rugged sensation of his newly shaved stubble stroking your skin. Spencer melted into the warmth of your touch.
"You're giving me far too much credit here, Spencer," you whispered. "Everything you are has always been your own doing rather than mine. All I ever did was cheer you on from the sideline. You would still have become the person that you are today even if I weren't in your life."
Spencer physically shuddered at your last statement. "Don't say that. I can't even begin to imagine a life without you in it."
"Well, even if such day does come, when I won't be a part of your life anymore, I know you're gonna be just fine. Because you'll have Dee with you--" you stroked Diana's head lovingly, "--and I know that the two of you will give each other enough love and strength that you won't even notice I'm not around anymore."
The frown on Spencer's face deepened.
"You're not allowed to leave me. Ever," Spencer decided childishly.
"Fine. I won't. But you have to remember--" you brought your palm towards Spencer's chest, feeling each rhythmic thrum of his heart which seemed to flutter ever so slightly underneath your fingers, "--I'll be right here if you need me. Always."
Spencer's own hand landed on top of your hand, entwining your fingers together without ever tearing his fierce gaze away from yours.
"Always."
The sun was shining down in flimsy rays when Spencer and Dee finally walked past the familiar gate. Glimmers of gold sneaked past the reddish leaves on branches before falling upon the ground.
Next to him, Diana was humming a melody that Spencer recognized from one of your specially curated playlists. Her little hands struggled to carry the gigantic bouquet that she couldn't wait to present to you. It didn't matter that the bouquet itself was nearly as tall as she was, Diana still refused to let Spencer assist her.
"I wanna give Mommy the flowers myself," she had told Spencer in a manner that reminded him too much of your own stubbornness.
After a couple more minutes of walking, Spencer's reverie was soon broken by the excited squeal coming from the little girl beside him.
"Mommy! Mommy!"
Diana dashed into a sprint before words of warning could fall from Spencer's lips. He watched intensely as Diana's little feet moved upon the ocean of fallen leaves on the ground. Her tight grip around the bouquet never wavered even when she ran up the grassed hill, all the way towards the destination in her mind.
All the way towards the headstone with your name written on it.
When Spencer finally got there, Diana was kneeling next to your grave with panting breaths, but the smile stretched on her lips was the biggest one that Spencer had ever seen.
"Hi, Mommy. I'm back with Daddy," Diana announced. "Daddy, go say hi to Mommy."
"Hello, my love." Spencer smiled before taking a seat next to his daughter.
"We brought flowers, Mommy! They're your favorites. I added daisies to make them prettier." Diana beamed before putting the bouquet against your headstone. "You're not gonna believe what happened in class yesterday!"
As Diana animatedly began to recount the funny incident in her classroom--somehow involving a boy named Patrick and a cup of slushie--Spencer watched over her with a permanent smile on his lips. The little girl loved to talk--a trait she obviously acquired from both of her parents--and Spencer knew just how much you used to adore listening to Dee's rambling at any time of day.
It must have been at least ten minutes later when Diana's story eventually whirled to an end. Her attention instantly shifted to the family who was paying their own respect just two headstones over, a small squeak of puppy tumbled from Dee's lips before she dashed towards the boy with a golden retriever pup beside his legs.
Spencer shook his head affectionately at his daughter's antics.
"I know we were just here a couple of weeks ago, but Dee wanted to tell you about the slushie incident herself," he said. "And, well, I can never deny the chance to visit you, love."
A loud laughter boomed a few feet away. Spencer watched as Diana ran around jubilantly with the little boy and his dog. The boy's father waved at Spencer from the distance, which he replied with an acknowledging nod.
"She's getting so big, sweetheart. Sometimes, I just wanna stop time and keep her as my little girl forever. I wish you were around to see how much she's grown." Spencer smiled ruefully. "I can't believe that it's been more than a year since you were gone."
Spencer thought back to the last few moments you spent on this earth. How just a few months prior, the doctor had advised you to stop the treatment and take a rest at home instead.
The chemo isn't working, was what the doctor was really saying. You should be spending as much time as you can with your family.
So, that was exactly what you ended up doing.
Spencer had quit his job at the FBI shortly after you were diagnosed, opting to take a full-time job of teaching where the hours were more humane and reasonable. The day you were discharged from the hospital, Spencer made a vow to himself to make every day as memorable as he could, and he was keeping true to it. Those last few months were filled with countless road trips, an unforgettable weekend at Disneyland, and visits to various museums across the states. Spencer made sure that each day was charged with love and laughter, a perfect day culminated by an equally perfect night, with you falling asleep in the safety of his arms.
Until one morning, when Spencer woke up to your cold and lifeless body lying by his side.
"Do you remember what you told me once? About how Dee and I would never notice you were gone because we would have each other?" Spencer recalled. "You were wrong about that, sweetheart. Your absence is the first thing I notice every time I start my day. The moment I open my eyes, I notice that you aren't lying next to me on the bed like you're supposed to be. I notice the cold imprints on the sheets where your warmth used to linger. I notice you in every corner of our home, but most importantly, I notice you in Dee."
Spencer glanced at his little girl, playing and running around a pile of fallen leaves with her newfound friend and his pet dog. His heart floundered at the scene.
"Everyone keeps saying that she's an exact copy of me, but I see glimpses of you in her more and more every single day," Spencer admitted. "She's the only anchor I have left now, my love. Without her, I'm lost. I try constantly, with whatever strength still resides in me, to give her everything she would ever need. Shower her with every ounce of love I have left in my heart."
A lone tear cascaded down Spencer's cheek. He quickly erased it away with a wry chuckle.
"What I would do to have a minute with you again, my love. I hope you know I'd give my heart and soul to have those extra sixty seconds just to stare at your beautiful face. To hold you in my arms one last time. I try my best to fill the void that you left for Dee's sake. Some days are difficult, and I keep thinking about how much better it would be--how much better off she would be--if it were you here with her instead of me. I'd trade places with you if I could. I fear that all of me would never be enough for her, because she needs you. We both do."
Spencer inhaled a breath, forcing the imminent wave of tears from breaking the dam he had masterfully crafted since the moment you were gone. He promised a long time ago never to allow the grief to consume him.
He still had his daughter to think about.
"I'm beginning to think people are wrong when they say time makes everything better. The pain never lessens. It just becomes bearable with time. Dee makes it bearable," Spencer confessed. "I can only hope I'm doing the same for her."
"Daddy! Daddy!"
Spencer hurriedly wiped away any sign of tears from his face before he caught Diana in his arms. Her innocent laughter was a balm to the gaping wound in his chest, and Spencer allowed himself to bask in the bliss that his little girl brought to his life.
"What is it, Pumpkin?"
"Look what Brian's mom gave me!"
Spencer looked at her tiny hand to see a plastic daisy ring gracing one of her fingers. He looked up towards the family in the distance, mouthing a thank you to the mother who waved him off with a smile.
"It's very pretty, Dee."
"Like me?"
The young dad chuckled. "Yes, very much like you."
"Like Mommy, too?"
Spencer's smile softened. "Very much like Mommy, too. Yes."
The exhilarated smile Diana rewarded him could probably light up the entire state of Virginia at night.
Five minutes later, Spencer found himself bidding you a goodbye, with Diana promising to visit again very soon to give you an update over the slushie incident that supposedly got Patrick in a lot of trouble at school. The air was getting even chillier as the two walked the path they had taken after arriving at the cemetery. Spencer tugged Diana closer to his side once he saw the familiar gate lurking a few feet ahead, keeping her safe while simultaneously seeking her warmth.
"Daddy?" Dee's voice arose shyly once the pair had reached the main street.
"Yes, Pumpkin?"
"I miss Mommy," she admitted quietly.
Spencer's fingers instinctively tightened for a split second around his daughter's hand. "I know you do, Pumpkin. You just need to remember, even if she's not physically with us anymore, that she's always watching over you and keeping you safe."
Diana nodded her head understandingly. "Do you miss her, too, Daddy?"
"Every day, Dee." Spencer smiled, glancing back towards the gate of the cemetery behind him. "Every single day."
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𝐀 𝐁𝐫𝐚𝐧𝐝𝐞𝐝 𝐃𝐞𝐯𝐢𝐥
Aegon Targaryen x Fem!reader
Summary: You were the only one who truly saw the tortured king. Not his mother, not his brother, and certainly not his wife.
Warning: Language, Infidelity, Humiliation, Toxicity, King Complex, Slight Angst, Smut (+18) Minors DNI, Canon typical Incest, Grinding, Forced orgasm, King Kink?, Dom/Sub Themes, Controlled Orgasm, Ownership Kink, Dub/Con, Groping, Humping, Pussy rubbing, Exhibition Kink
This isn't very good, I admit. I just needed to get it out of my head.
Despite your eye following the pathway of High Valyrian ink splashed on the weathered pages of your book, your brain takes forever to process the words.. It is a story you had enjoyed since the days of your wetnurse but now you are focused on the utter injustices occurring by the dinner table before you. You always found your nose nestled in a book throughout dinner, all save for this one.
The Queen mother is bent over her plate, forgetting her table manners in the vehemence of her passions, while Aemond assumes a hostile glare from his perch at the head of the table. Aegon sits slumped in between you and Helena, with his half lidded eyes so painfully tedious as he prods at his food, while these fake gods scold him from above.
"And to make matters impossibly worse, you failed to display even a shred of sympathy towards his condition-" Despite the nature of his mother's tone, it does not stop Aegon from rebutting where necessary, with a quick, sharpness on his tongue.
"This 'condition' you speak of, being the imprisonment of a wealthy merchant's stupid son." Aegon releases a short, winded chuckle, one that you share behind the concealment of your book. "Perhaps he shouldn't have gotten himself captured."
"He is apart of your battalion, Aegon- fighting your war-"
"I am not at war. As I sit here, I am not harbouring any ill feelings towards any party-"
Aemond interrupts, "All you think about is fucking and drinking-"
"Precisely brother!" Aegon proceeds to turn to his mother, with his hands splayed outwards he reiterates, "All I think about is fucking and drinking,"
A loud, unladylike snort escapes the confines of your throat which you attempt to sheath with a cough as you study the words in your book. Aemond rolls his eyes while Aegon throws a blatant smirk beside you- "See Mother! Now our dear cousin has fallen ill as a result of the animosity stirred by your incessant scolding!” Aegon’s voice is doused in sarcasm as he rubs his hand into your shoulder, “All because of your nagging, mother," Alicent’s eyes darken as her voice descends into caution "Aegon. Tomorrow you are to formally apologise to that Knight. He is a seasoned member of your Kingsguard-" The politics was becoming far too much on him. His grip has yet to leave your shoulder.
"Why the complete and utter fuck should I be pandering to my subjects?"
Aemond is the first to inject "Have you not a shred of Diplomacy, you fucking imbecile?" You eye Aemond from above your book, and you cannot begin to imagine the younger brother would ever inject himself into Aegon's business, no reason except perhaps, jealousy?
Aegon promptly ignores Aegon, and, with his eyes on Alicent, he leans over the table and whispers:
"If Rhaenyra wishes to have the crown, she may gladly take it-"
"AEGON!" The queen's thunderous voice settles over the table like a tempest, injecting all those present with a sharp, instinctive flinch, all except Aegon, who remains lax and unaffected by her outburst, only fueling the Queen's anger to first born tenfold.
"I cannot rely on you for anything, Aegon, NOTHING! For a mother to be so utterly embarrassed by her son- her eldest son," there is venom in her incredulity, one that has your brows curving as you send a sympathetic gaze at the Usurper. You lower your novel and lean slightly closer to the battlefield that has befallen the dinner table. Aegon’s hand drops from your shoulder, landing in your lap. You clasp his trembling hand in both of yours.
How a simple visit to see your cousins in King's Landing had turned into a public execution of Aegon's dignity, is utterly beyond you. You decide that you simply will not allow it, you cannot allow it, and solidarity is all you hope Aegon feels radiating from your clasped hands under the table.. You look up at him, thinking you might look up to find anguish in Aegon's eyes, but all you find there is a sly, almost secretive smirk dancing along his visage.
"You govern this country like a child-" Aemond begins but you're quick to snip back,
"Perhaps we should be mindful, cousin of the fact that Aegon still is a child. He is but 20 years in age!" You exclaim, with your own incredulity coating your laughter, "Aegon's destiny was pre-written when you were barely able to wipe your own shit, Cousin." Aegon fails to conceal his crass bought of laughter.
"I've no time for this," Alicent says, pushing herself out of her chair before rising in silent anger, "Helena, come," she commands before leading a slightly aloof Helena out the dining hall without another word. Helena mumbles something about broken unions in iron castings before disappearing.
The silence is deafening as Aemond's one eye studies the two of you - he is not able to see your hand underneath the table, you don’t think…
"Before you think about fucking our cousin, at least think about fucking your wife." Aemond announces, to an amused Aegon who keeps his amused gaze lowered to the table. It is then that Aegon squeezes your hand, still seated on your lap. His fingers encircle yours in what you initially deduce is acknowledgement of your solidarity, but what you quickly realise is something much more sinister.
"I cannot say I will heed your counsel, brother," It is then that Aegon grabs ahold of your hand, guiding you until your palm is cupping his hardened cock. "But you can trust that your council is solemnly heard."
Aemond watches you from above the rim of his chalice as he empties the final traces of his wine before placing his chalice back on the table. His exit is a slow one, one that has your anticipation expanding and Aegon's patience waning. In all honesty, hearing your valiant defence to preserve his dignity raised an intense feeling of desire in Aegon. Even though Aegon's only feeling ever, always seemed to be desire.
"Come here," He says once Aemond footsteps have echoed away, "I need your mouth," Despite his command, Aegon is already leaning in with his hand cupping the back of your skull. Soon, all you can smell is him. All you can feel is him. All you can taste is the drunken and sunken taste of him.
His tongue forces its way into your mouth, ripping a fresh groan from inside you as he twirls you into his lap. He has you arrested on him, his front to your back, with your arse pressed on his crotch. His hand on your face cranes your neck backwards and forces his mouth on yours, promising that even if you wanted to free yourself, you may never be able to.
"I love how you see me," He whispers, never breaking away too far, in fear of you disappearing, "How utterly pleased I am with the version of myself I see living in your eyes," His words spill out of him and slip inside your mouth bridged by your shared saliva.
"He is not useless. He is not pitiful," Aegon breaks away from the kiss, to lay a palm on your cheek.
As one hand lovingly strokes the side of your face, Aegon’s other hand is ravenous, as it palms your sensitive breasts through the bodice of your dress.
"Thank you for not judging me," He all but whimpers as he buries his face in the crook of your neck. He breathes you in until his hips attempt to grind into you like a touch starved adolescent boy, while he ventures under your soft skirts.
"You don't have to thank me, Aegon." Your hands reach backwards to cradle his head into the crook of neck just as Aegon's fingers reach around to hook into the seat of your underwear. You aren't nearly as aroused as him, but somehow that fact has Aegon spiralling even further into arousal. His eyes are squeezed shut as he leans into you, smelling you, while his fingers drift over your pussy, searching desperately for a reaction.
"It is very rare that I find myself wanting to give any woman pleasure," Aegon's admits, with a low, dense drawl. His actions steal the breath from your very lungs as you feel the first sign of wetness begin to coat your underwear. He is in utter awe when he feels it. Quickly descending into a level of pleasure that he was not even sure existed, "I fucking love your cunt," He murmurs in his desperate drunken haze, "I wish to play with it and taste it and fuck it until you’re barely able to speak-"
"God's, Aegon!" Your voice is hoarse and your cries reach the highest rafter of the dining hall. Despite your degenerate wails, Aegon does little to stop them, in fact he encourages them, as his fingers push your underwear aside.
"When did you get so fucking wet?" The warmth of his breath fans against your cheeks, as he presses his front against your behind, "Did I get you this wet?" He asks, before getting the strongest surge of arousal as he whispers, "Did your King get you this wet?"
All you are able to accomplish is a nod as your mind explodes with vibrant visions of your near release. Soon, you're moving your hips in tandem with Aegon's fingers squeezing sloppily at your clit before rubbing with vicious surety.
"Please-"
"Call me by my title," He whispers, completely stripped from his sensibilities. "Tell your King to make you come," Aegon's brain is filled with what he suspects is determination. He is determined to see the most lecherous parts of you crack, and have it done by his design. He rubs your cunt with furious passion while he pushes up from underneath you, utterly destroyed by the idea of having a monopolised control over the workings of your body.
"Fuck- please my King!" The ache between your legs is as warm and erratic as Aegon's hands. "Please let me cum-"
"Tis only I, who can get My Lady this wet and needy," He murmurs, quite literally to himself, as he pushes his hips against your arse.
"Only you, My King." You decide to humour him, seeking the quickest way to your release, "Only you can make me cum," Throughout his tirade, Aegon's other, unoccupied hand has reached around and clasped itself against your throat. He is violent in his actions, squeezing deliriously until your throat is vacuumed of all its air. It's an utterly depraved situation you have both found yourselves in.
Anyone could decide to walk in at any moment and Aegon affirms as much. "You're such a pretty little whore, making a mess on my fingers like this. Fuck, The servants could decide to walk through at any moment," His grip on your throat relaxes, allowing you gasp hungrily for air while the first spots of your organs threaten to surge through you.
"P-Please, My King-"
"What would they think if they find you humping my hand like such a needy, little whore?" He is rubbing rough circles against your cunt until finally, you're unable to resist teetering on the edge much longer. As your orgasm washes over you, and your body shudders above him, Aegon's own orgasm is triggered as he forces your hips further onto the seat of his pants.
"My Lord," your voice is shallow but a restless tremor settles on your limbs, "Have you no shame," you're partially jesting, as you try to come back from your previous delirium.
"I've already been branded a devil," He says, "There is no Grace left to fall from."
<3
© to @mphountitled on tumblr; do not repost
#house of the dragon#house of the dragon x reader#hotd#hotd x reader#hotd x you#hotd aegon#aegon ii targaryen#aegon targaryen x reader#aegon x reader#aemond x reader#aegon targaryen smut#hotd smut#aegon smut
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omg bestieeeee i so need hocker h nd ballerina to talk and smooch !!!!! ngl i’m a sucker for protective and jealous h 🤭🤭🤭🤭 🐱
I feel like ive made you guys wait way too long for this one gvkdfjgkf
a continuation of this blurb! (and sort of this one)
word count: 2.3k (we had a lot of ground to cover)
content warnings: minor mentions of smut, slight angst but all is fixed by the end, not ramadan friendly
main masterlist | hockey h masterlist
talk to me
. . .
Two weeks.
Two weeks of radio silence from Y/N.
Two weeks of over-thinking everything he did that night.
Two weeks of Harry drunk texting her on lonely nights.
please just tell me if you hate me
im so sorry
ill leave you alone if its what you want, I just need to know
Each and every time, Y/N read his messages, eyes scanning over the words, and locked her phone.
The truth is, she doesn't know what she wants from him, if anything. She doesn't know why she felt so attracted to him that night — she was tipsy, not drunk, and in complete control of her actions. She never hooked up with people in public — no messy makeouts, but she certainly never let anyone finger her in the hallway of a bar.
The entire thing was completely unlike her. Maybe that's what scared her the most.
Deep down, she wanted to reply to him, but she didn't even know what to say. She didn't want him to leave her alone — maybe that was selfish, but she liked knowing he was at least a little okay. She'd even been keeping secret tabs on the hockey team. They had won their past two games, but Harry had been thrown out in the most recent one for unsportsmanlike conduct. Apparently, he'd gotten into a fight with one of the players on the other team.
Admittedly, that worried her, but she didn't want to be his babysitter. On top of that, the spring showcase was this weekend, and she'd thrown every last bit of her energy into rehearsing and practicing to make sure her performance would be absolutely flawless.
She didn't have the time — or mental capacity — to worry about Harry right now.
. . .
"You look like an idiot."
Harry rolls his eyes as he adjusts the collar on his button down for the third time. James and his girlfriend Melanie had helped him with ironing it out so it looked presentable enough on his body. Anything he ever did rarely called for slacks and button up shirts, but Melanie advised him to look polished and put-together for tonight.
He wasn't in a place to reject her advice.
The other teammates that James lived with weren't quite as kind. Stephen, a sophomore defenseman who was only on the team for the perks of sleeping with every girl he could get his hands on, wouldn't stop throwing sarcastic comments Harry's way.
"Shut up, Stephen!" Melanie calls from the living room. She marches into James' bedroom as Harry smoothes out a few leftover wrinkles in his slacks, swallowing tightly. "When's the last time you cared about something besides fucking random girls? At least Harry has some direction in his life."
"I'm just saying, the girl's been ignoring him for weeks. She's gonna laugh in his face."
"Leave!" Melanie exclaims, batting him on the shoulder. Stephen lets out a yelp of pain and Harry smirks, despite the anxiety throbbing in his chest. "You're not helping! Get out!"
Reluctantly, Stephen rolls his eyes as he follows Melanie's orders and leaves the room. She sighs and comes up from behind Harry before flashing him a hopeful grin.
"You look great, H. I think this is a really sweet gesture."
He nibbles on his bottom lip as he turns to face her. "Okay, but what if Stephen's dumbass is right? She could call security on me and have me removed."
Melanie gives him a sympathetic look, "Yeah, it's a possibility. But isn't it better to go down fighting?"
He shrugs.
"You said ballet is her everything. It's her entire life. Show her that you're willing to integrate yourself into that."
"Yeah," he breathes out, nodding slowly. "Yeah, you're right."
"I know I am." she grins. "Okay, let's get you over there. Don't forget the flowers you picked up!"
. . .
30 minutes later, Harry can't stop shifting uncomfortably as he sits in an aisle seat in the campus auditorium at Y/N's spring showcase.
The massive bouquet of flowers in his lap keep making his nose run and he feels like he's being suffocated by the buttons on his shirt that go all the way up to his neck. Best of all, according to the show program, Y/N isn't scheduled to go on until the very end. She mentioned to him once that being placed as the finale act is the best and biggest compliment, and he can't fight the bit of pride that thrums in his heart.
For an hour, he sits there, fidgeting with the cuffs of his shirt and pinching his bottom lip between his fingers as he waits for Y/N to go on. He sits through mediocre singing showcases and even a violin solo that almost puts him to sleep, if not for the older man clearing his throat next to him. Melanie and James even text him during the intermission to see how it's going, but he doesn't have much to report back.
Finally, the show comes to a close and her name is announced, following by the title of the French piece of music she's dancing to. His heart throbs in his chest — he's so nervous for her, especially knowing she hurt her ankle just a few weeks back. But the second she graces the stage, she's a vision of beauty, strength, and delicacy all at the same time. It's enough to take Harry's breath away.
As he sits there watching her, he doesn't move a muscle. Not for a single jump, spin, or step. He doesn't know anything about ballet — not aside from what Y/N has told him — but in that moment, he realizes that he'd be willing to learn every little thing there is to know if it meant she let him back into her life.
She's gorgeous. She offers a flawless performance and the second she's finished, a look of relief washes over her face as she takes a subdued bow, her pretty eyes widening when she sees all the people — Harry included — standing and applauding her.
For Y/N, the hard part was over. For Harry, it had just begun.
. . .
Y/N is elated to have a moment of silence after her performance.
With the dressing room door shut behind her, she lets out a long, deep breath. The dance she'd been driving herself crazy over for months was finally over.
And yet, for some reason, she feels empty.
She shoves it down as sits, eager to get her pointe shoes off. She's ready to shed her costume and get into sweatpants and head home. She knows the rest of the performers are heading out to a party tonight, but she's exhausted.
She's sorting through the bag of clothes she brought when there's a soft knock at the door. She knows she only has around 20 minutes to get out before the janitorial staff starts cleaning, so she rises with a sigh, unlocking the door and opening it.
"I'll be done soon, I just need to change—"
It's not the janitor, though.
It's Harry. Standing there stiffly in a starchy button down with a huge bouquet of flowers that almost encompass the width of his broad shoulders.
"What are you doing here?" she blurts without thinking.
"I came to watch you perform," he replies gently. His throat bobs as he hands her the flowers. "These are for you."
"You didn't watch me." she snorts with a shake of her head. She hasn't accepted the bouquet yet.
"Yes, I did," he instantly fires back, "What, do you wanna see my ticket for proof? I was in seat F34, next to an old man who kind of smelled like soup, and he kept clearing his throat and it was really annoying but I didn't care because I came to see you, and I'd sit through hours of bullshit to watch you dance."
Harry can't read the blank expression of her face, but he takes it as a step in the right direction when she takes the flowers from him. She blinks as she glances past him and then steps aside, motioning for him to come in.
"I have to get my shit together and leave soon, so... just sit in here."
He nods. He's hesitant to allow himself to relax since he's not sure if he's in the clear yet. She closes the dressing room door behind her and places the bouquet on her vanity.
"I need to change," she says, spinning around to face him. "Close your eyes."
He chuckles until he sees the serious expression on her face. "Wait, really?"
"Yes, really."
"But... I— y'know—"
"Just turn the fuck around, Harry."
He does as he's told, shutting his eyes as he listens to her roll her tights down and step out of her leotard. One day, if she let him, he'd be more than happy to do that for her — not even in a sexual way, but he knows how tiring it can be to take off his own gear after a long game. He thinks it would be nice to be there for her.
"Okay, you're good," she murmurs. She's stuffing her things in her tote bag when he bats his eyes back open.
"Are you meeting up with anyone after this? I'm sure your friends came to see you, but I just wanted to maybe talk and... y'know, clear the air a bit." Harry says, wringing his hands nervously in his lap. Y/N furrows a brow as she analyzes his body language. She doesn't think she's actually seen him look anxious before.
"Um... no," she says with a shake of her head before quickly revising her answer, "No, I mean, I'm not meeting up with anyone and no one came to see me. Except you, I guess."
"Wait, really?"
She sighs as she pauses the process of gathering her things. "Really, Harry."
He swallows tightly. They're silent for a moment as she grabs her jacket and throws it over her shoulders.
"Come over and we'll talk. I borrowed my friend Matt's car for the night but— yeah, you can follow me to my place or whatever. And I can't promise I'll be awake for much longer but I think clearing the air could be... good."
A rush of relief makes its way through Harry's body.
"Okay. Yeah, let's do that."
. . .
"I never said it, but you were flawless tonight."
Y/N laughs breathily as she settles onto her couch, a cup of sleepy time tea in her hand. Harry rejected her offer for one (his response had been, "Y/N, do I look like someone who drinks tea with a sleeping bear on it?") but he'd be lying if he said it didn't at least smell good.
"I fucked up on one of my jetés — I'll get yelled at for it on Monday, but otherwise I'm decently content with the performance."
"Well, you couldn't tell," Harry replies, "Seriously. You were perfect."
Her cheeks warm and she stares down at her tea. Her legs are sprawled out in front of her while Harry sits on the other edge of the couch, giving her plenty of room to stretch out.
"So... clearing the air."
Harry clears his throat and nods, prepared to embark on the speech he'd been practicing in his head for weeks. But then, she speaks.
"I'm sorry for running out on you and ignoring you," she says, keeping her gaze down in her lap. "That wasn't... I'm not the best person. I'm bad at feelings and I use ballet as a crutch. I figure it's the one thing I'm really, exceptionally good at, and that should give me a pass in life but I know that's not true. I can't just go around treating people like shit because I'm... scared."
"What are you scared of?" Harry asks through furrowed brows. "I'm sorry if I stepped out of line that night, I should've been better—"
"You didn't. You were great. You did everything perfectly," she replies with a shake of her head. Her response surprises him, but he tries to hide the shock on his face. "I'm scared because you're you. You're a hotshot hockey player and, besides this showcase, you're the only other thing I've thought about these past few weeks. That's horrifying for me."
"Is this...?" Harry attempts to roll his lips into a thin line, preventing a smirk from bursting onto his face. "Is this a very Y/N way of telling me that you like me?"
She groans, as if it's the worst thing to ever happen to her, and it makes Harry laugh.
"Don't laugh at me!" she exclaims. That only makes Harry cackle even louder as he slowly crawls over to her, taking her warm cup of tea out of her hands and placing it on the coffee table.
"You're cute when you're exasperated." he murmurs. She pouts and his eyes crinkle with a grin as he peels her shaky hands away from her face.
"You're the one exasperating me."
"I know," he replies lowly, licking his lips as his face hovers over hers, "I like it."
"This isn't us agreeing to date, by the way." she quickly tacks on. He issues out a mhm as he leans forward, testing the waters, and pressing a light kiss to her nose. "We need to take it slow. Like, painfully slow. Or else I'll freak out and run away again."
"Whatever you want." he mumbles, kissing her right cheek. "I mean it."
"And you can't just overwhelm me whenever you feel like it."
He laughs and kisses her left cheek, then her forehead.
"Okay. Any other demands?"
He stops pasting kisses to her face then, instead choosing to simply loom his lips over hers. He can feel her heart beating rapidly in her chest and watches as she swallows nervously.
"No," she finally whispers. "Just kiss me."
And so he does.
#writing#hockey h#harry styles#harry styles writing#harry styles fic#harry styles fan fic#harry styles fanfiction#harry styles fanfic#harry styles x reader#harry styles imagine#harry styles one direction#harry styles blurb#harry styles angst#harry styles one shot#harry styles fluff#harry styles x you#harry styles x oc#harry styles au#harry styles smut#one direction#harry styles x y/n#hockerry#harry's house#fine line#hs4
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COLD NIGHTS & BLURRED LINES (m) — JJK
jungkook and you have been in a sexual relationship with each other for four months now, and it’s casual for the most part. but as time passes, you can’t help but feel that some of the lines suddenly got blurred in the process. is it a cliché to blur the lines with your fuck buddy? it definitely is. will you do something about it? both of your emotional constipation have a hard time saying yes.
PAIRING jungkook x (fem) reader
GENRE r18+ (explicit smut, fluff, light angst) MINORS DO NOT INTERACT!
WORD COUNT 26.6k
WARNINGS/MISC fwb!au, college!au, basketball player!jk, kinda secret relationship(?)!au, nerdy!oc but not really she’s just very school-oriented, jk is tatted up here and is very yummy especially in his jersey sighs, hes also rich lol, school journalist!reader, jk calls oc a lot of petnames, basketball stuff im not sure are accurate t-t. multiple sex scenes honestly idek where all of these came from but they include: unprotected sex (this is a fanfiction everything tends to be crazy around these areas don’t do it irl pls omg lol), penetrative sex, creampie, cumplay, car sex, jk’s silver chain hehe, slight cockwarming, oral sex (f and m receiving), jk wears those curvy headbands thing (they look so cute on guys in fact he wore it once), shower sex. if there is anything i left out, pls tell me so that i can add them here. jungkooks visual is jungkook at jitb listening party .
NOTES if u have been following me you'll know this is a repost haha! i decided to publish this again so you can read it on tumblr if u dont like to read on ao3! also, please pleasssseee send me guys your feedbacks after reading it even a keyboard smash goes a long way anyway ill shut up now i hope you guys enjoy this monster!! last note, pls be gentle with my cn&bl babies <33
[ CN&BL MOODBOARD ]
The late March weather has been cold these days, so when Jungkook – in his real fuckboy fashion – texted you that his nose could use a heater and he could offer to warm you up in return, you agreed for him to come over even though you pretended to be disgusted by his offer.
“Hurry,” you whimper as aforementioned man manhandles you to get you off his lap, making you bounce on the mattress.
Just like that, the warmth from being pressed against his body was gone, exchanged by the cold immediately spreading goosebumps through your skin as Jungkook makes quick work of spreading your legs, eliciting a bit of an uncomfortable feeling from you as you feel your cum leaking out.
Jungkook swipes a hand through his sweaty hairline as he kneels inside your spread legs, and you have to fight a moan at the sight. You still feel a little delirious from when he made you cum the second time just a minute ago, still lightheaded from the high of it. But you can’t deny that he always looks so good in all his natural, naked form; chest heaving, toned stomach coated in sheer sweat, his biceps – especially the tatted one – bulging as he reaches for your hips to pull you down so he could enter you once again.
It tears a cry from your vocal chords, him thrusting in and out of your wet pussy, his pace frantic and inconsistent, a tell-tale sign of his impending orgasm. His grunts, together with your pathetic little moans at the feel of his cock touching every part of your pussy filled the room.
“Fuck, I’m close,” he groans, leaning down, and as a result, reaching deeper into you, mouth reaching for your breast to your mouth. The kiss is a sloppy act of both of you just breathing in each other’s mouths, as Jungkook drills your pussy faster, his fingers tightening around your waist. A particular hard thrust got you drawing out a loud mewl and that’s what tips Jungkook over the edge. “F-fuck – shit, where do I cum baby? Tell me, tell me.”
“Inside– fuck. Please cum inside me,”
He lets out a sharp breath and after a few more erratic strokes, you feel his hot release painting your inner walls.
“Shit,” Jungkook hissed as he fell on top of you. You can feel the way he’s heaving as his skin touches yours, but you let yourself relax on the mattress, breathing shallow breaths.
Since he’s way more athletic than you, he got over it soon and you feel him picking himself up to hover over you, beginning to plant kisses all over your chest and the mole in between them; your nipples, your shoulders, your collarbones.
“Kook,” you call softly, your limp hand patting his ass to get his attention. He always gets so preoccupied with kissing your body after sex.
Jungkook hums, but he looks at you. “Yeah?”
You grunt. “I jwashed my sheets two days ago and I don’t want cum stains on them.”
“Yeah, yeah, I know,” he leans down, and even though you were complaining just now, you let out quite a joyful hum when he kisses you. “Let me see first.”
You don’t need to ask what he’s referring to.
Pushing your body back up, Jungkook takes it upon himself to get his body off of you only to watch as you slide two fingers over your pussy, spreading the lips so he can see the combination of your and his cum all over it.
“You need to hurry, Nayeon is coming home in a few minutes.”
He doesn’t even try to look like he’s concerned about the urgency of that matter, just hums absentmindedly and gets his own finger to run over your exposed heat. You shiver at the contrast of the hot feeling of your pussy and the cold feeling of his finger, but it soon turns into pleasure when he gathers your cum and pushes it back into you.
“Are you going to keep it in for me?” He whispers, a thumb now caressing your hip.
“Depends.”
Jungkook looks back up at you, a sly grin spreading on his lips. “On what?”
“If you’re going to be good and say please when you want something.” You grin at him, feeling pretty proud of yourself for catching him off guard. It doesn’t last long very much though as he smirks, but as soon as he opens his mouth, you hear a series of knocks and your eyes widen at that.
You hissed. “Shit, that’s Nayeon.”
You sit up from the bed. Jungkook mirrors your haste, scrambling to find his clothes on the floor and putting them on quickly. You have your robe just nearby so you put just that on, ignoring the tingling sensation of cum trickling down your legs.
“I have to go.” Jungkook whispers, and you nod, walking towards the window on the far end of the room and opening it up widely.
Like usual, Jungkook steps on the frame and easily hauls himself outside. It’s the backside of the building of your complex, and it’s mostly and usually quiet, so it was pretty safe for him to just go out of there without anyone noticing, and most especially at times like this. Because Nayeon can’t know. No one can.
“I’ll see you later, pretty.”
Jungkook winks at you and you playfully roll your eyes, waving him off which earns a laugh from him. He easily saunters through the perimeter though and you find it quite unfair how he still carries a certain graceful energy to him even though he literally just did an exhausting cardio exercise with you for about thirty minutes. Ugh, him and his athletic body.
Nayeon’s voice can be heard across the flat, but before you let her in, you sprayed an unhealthy amount of air freshener on your body and around the room (just in case she enters) and shoved your discarded clothes from earlier in the laundry basket. After that, you finally run towards the door, welcoming Nayeon with a smile as you open it.
“Hi!” You greet rather cheerfully. She immediately hugs you briefly, groaning as she steps back and enters your little abode.
“Class sucked today,” she throws herself on the couch and you give her a sympathetic smile, walking towards the fridge to get water.
“Well, wish me luck. I’m headed out to one.”
“God, I can’t wait ‘til we graduate, I’m tired of this bullshit.” She says, but she’s opening up her laptop for what you could guess as for finishing up an assigned work. “I wish I was having bomb sex like you. Hey, do you want to go to this party on Friday?”
“I – what?”
“Party on Friday? Finals season for basketball starts on Friday and they’re planning a party. We could use free booze and stress-free night.” Nayeon repeats, but you weren’t asking for the party. You tried to ignore it, but you have the tendency to overexpplain yourself so that you do not get misunderstood.
“I’m not having bomb sex.” You say, and that makes her look at you. At that, you realized you shouldn't have taken the bait. Stupid, stupid, stupid you. You could've swerved this topic if you weren't so quick to react at the word sex.
You stare at each other for a solid few seconds until she rolls her eyes.
“Girl, your hair looks like a bird’s nest and your lips are swollen as hell. I might not be having bomb sex in the current moment but I know what I look like after I do the deed,” She wore her eyeglasses and perched it on her nose. “And you kinda smelled like sex when you opened the door.”
“No!” You feel heat coming and spreading through your cheeks. You thought the damn Febreeze would hold up!
Nayeon waves you off. “It’s fine, it’s not like you haven’t caught me before like that.”
“It’s embarrassing.” You insist, stuffing your face with a bread you took from the counter and purposefully not meeting Nayeon’s gaze so you don’t see the teasing smiles you’re sure she’s sending your way.
“That you’re having sex in college?!” Her playful scandalous tone makes you laugh though and that’s when you look at her.
“No, ugh. Just. Sorry. If I smelled like sex. I tried spraying a lot of air freshener earlier.”
She wiggles her brows. “Oh, is that why you took a long time opening the door? Was your sneaky link here just now?”
“Sneaky what?” You say, laughing.
“Sneaky link. You know, a hook up. Wait, is it a boyfriend? Please say no, because I would be extremely offended if you haven’t introduced your boyfriend to me all this time.”
You could swear you felt goosebumps on your nape when you heard the word boyfriend and saw images of Jungkook in your head immediately, as if you were used to associating him to the word.
“It’s definitely not a boyfriend. Just… someone I hook up with sometimes.”
“Interesting. Do I know him?”
The question makes you nervous. She definitely knows. No one not knows who Jungkook is at your campus.
With a shake of your head, you tell her, straight-faced, “Nope.”
“Okay, which department? Does he go to our Uni?” She asks, now seemingly fully invested in this conversation rather than the assignment before her. You’re happy to be a bit of a help to lessen her sour mood from earlier but you shake your head and let out playful tsk-ing sounds,
“Too many questions, babe,” You teased. “My class is starting in twenty minutes.”
You heard her laughing as you carried your clothes to the bathroom to change and to clean up the mess in your nether region. Damn. Jungkook cums a lot these days… he needs to masturbate or something.
“Fine, fine! You don’t want me to know but I’m gonna find out about the mystery guy one way or another!”
Shutting the door to the bathroom, your face contorts at Nayeon’s words.
Yeah, absolutely not. Jungkook and you made an agreement in the first place that everyone should be oblivious of your situationship, and it’s worked for almost four months now.
You can’t fuck it up now.
As soon as you fixed yourself, you bid your goodbye to Nayeon who went ahead and busied herself by hacking away on her laptop, grabbing your bag and heading out and finally walking to your Uni that was just a few minutes away from your complex. Your apartment is almost like a dorm, to be honest.
The hallway is a little crowded, but you don’t miss a certain brunette in a familiar gray hoodie you’ve had in your closet before.
You meet Jungkook’s eyes but you quickly change your gaze to his friend, Taehyung, who’s walking beside him as he greets you cheerfully.
"Hey, ___!” You return his smile, waving. You had a Philo class with Kim Taehyung at one point and found out that despite your preassumptions about him for being a varsity guy, he was a pretty interesting person to talk with. You’re not super close per se, just acquainted enough to acknowledge each other when you meet somewhere like the campus hallways.
You don’t like the attention it draws, though. So you walk straight to your destination.
Varsity guys tend to be famous, and you’ve chosen to steer yourself away from them. Ironic, though, considering that you’re fucking one. Obviously, you’re not doing a very good job at “steering yourself away from them”.
Maybe it’s the sole reason why it’s a secret. Jungkook is the star player of the basketball team together with Taehyung and a few other guys. You know their usual gist. Famous circle, lavish lifestyle, attractive guys who (unfortunately) know it, skillful at the sports they do, too many people fawning over them. And well… not to be that person but you’re just someone dutifully studying here. Someone in the background. And you love that mostly, but sometimes you think that maybe… it’s why Jungkook seems to never entertain the idea of making your relationship public. Not that you would like that yourself. You took part in the secrecy agreement, suggested it yourself, in fact. You would never admit to anyone you’re fucking him. But, well. It’s just weird.
Whatever. It doesn’t matter. Someone’s going to end it eventually and you’re gonna make sure it’s you… just so it’s established that you aren’t the one who’s more willing in the relationship. Yeah, that. Just not now. School is stressful. You like sex with him.
When you arrive at the lecture hall, your phone vibrates. A text from Jungkook is plastered all over your lock screen.
[1:15pm] Jeon: hi pretty
[1:15pm] Jeon: nice skirt :)
You internally roll your eyes. Him and his literal and figurative skirt chaser tendencies.
[1:20pm] You: Hi.
You get a reply immediately.
[1:20pm] Jeon: wanna grab dinner later
You stare at his text, a little taken aback.
That’s new. Sure, you had grabbed lunch with him at his stupid fancy Benz like, once. After he fucked you in it to ease your nerves about a class presentation you did earlier that day. He didn’t offer, he just bought you Chinese because you passed by a resto as he drove you to your place.
Anyway. You don’t know why he would do this all of a sudden. You fucked three days ago, then the day after that, then earlier this day. You’re not complaining but you never predicted your sex life would be so active like this.
[1:22pm] You: Pass. Studying later
Which is true. You have a Tech Writing quiz tomorrow, though not necessarily hard. Whatever. Your thoughts in the hallway awhile ago are making you feel kind of weird about him right now.
[1:23pm] Jeon: boring
[1:23pm] You: ):<
[1:23pm] Jeon: cute :) do u want me to order boba ill deliver it to ur place after ur class
Well, that is definitely not new. Jungkook delivers you food, like, every single time.
[1:24pm] You: :))) Yess. Thank you
[1:24pm] You: I’m going to venmo you
[1:25pm] Jeon: lol yk im just gonna venmo it back to u
True. There’s been a lot of back and forth in that app. One time, he “jokingly” sent you a hundred dollars (a hundred dollars!) after you kept on insisting you pay for the takoyaki he made delivered to you, and that horrified you so much that of course you sent the money back to him, but he made you promise to stop trying to argue with him about the payment thing. It doesn’t mean you don’t feel bad about it still though…
[1:25pm] You: 😤😠
[1:27pm] Jeon: do u also want anything besides boba
[1:27pm] You: Noppee, I think Nayeon is going to cook something for us later
[1:28pm] Jeon: alright
[1:28pm] You: Are you sure you don’t want me to pay you back?
[1:28pm] Jeon: nahh it’s alright
[1:28pm] Jeon: besides I can think of other ways for u to pay me back without money involved.. ;)
Ah, there he is. He really couldn’t go on a day without sexual innuendos.
[1:29pm] You: You are infuriating and I’m turning off mh phone
[1:29pm] You: *my
[1:29pm] Jeon: you like when I annoy you so ..
[1:29pm] You: No I don’t and Im so sore i feel like my brain will leak out of my ears from so much sex
[1:29pm] You: Also please stop using ellipsis in texts
[1:29pm] Jeon: hmm
[1:29pm] Jeon: who said anything about sex?
[1:30pm] Jeon: not me🤔 do u think i just think about sex all the time
[1:30pm] Jeon: what’s worng with ellipsis…?
[1:32pm] You: Yes you do think about sex all the time
He reacted to that message with the HAHA emoticon, and you felt yourself having a hard time fighting an eyeroll.
[1:32pm] Jeon: you know me so well
[1:32pm] You: Also, nothing wrong with ellipsis they just remind me of how my dad texts
[1:32pm] Jeon: ummmmm im sure ur dad is great so im flattered
You snorted at that.
[1:33pm] You: you do NOT know that
[1:33pm] Jeon: i thought you were turning off your phone
[1:34pm] You: I am right now so don’t reply prof is walking to the lecture hall now
[1:35pm] Jeon: good luck baby ;)
Nayeon didn’t convince you enough to join her at the party she mentioned before come Friday night. In a weird parallelism, Jungkook also texted you about a party you could come to, and eventually, you’ve come to realize that it was his party. Their party.
Your Uni’s basketball team held a celebratory one because they won the first game of Finals. You only knew when you went to the school’s publication office earlier. The freshman sports journalist, Ryujin, came to you to ask you some questions about her rough draft about said game.
You see, this is one of those times when you are reminded that Jungkook and you really only have a relationship through sex. Sure, you know some stuff about each other. Like how you are an English major, he’s taking Computer Science, you’re the managing director of the school’s publication, he’s a star player in the basketball team; he knows about your favorite takoyaki flavor (it’s smoked bacon) and your boba order, and you know he likes food that you dislike, namely cheese cake and mint chocolate flavored stuff. He also likes Marvel a lot. He knows you’re obsessed with films from the golden age of Hongkong cinema because you mentioned it in passing. (He doesn’t know you particularly love the Wong Kar-wai ones though…)
But somehow, he never really tells you about his basketball games. Sure, he’d mentioned practices before but it’s something he doesn’t bother to include you in. Not that it would matter to you. It’s not like you tell him all about your stuff in school, either.
Your attention is caught by a ping from your phone.
[12:05am] Jeon: hey you still up?
The text reads. You type a reply.
[12:07am] You: Yes, why?
[12:07am] Jeon: let’s facetime
[12:07am] You: Why
[12:08am] Jeon: i want to see your pretty face
Spoken like a true fuckboy. Really?
Before you could respond, his face is taking up your whole screen, asking to facetime you. Without thinking about it too much, you accepted the call, falling back to your bed.
From the screen, you could see that he’s wearing a black shirt with a long silver chain around his neck. He smiles that adorable smile when you finally make your whole face visible to the camera.
“What is it?”
The audio from his end is a little distorted, probably from the loud music from where he’s at. That after-game party, most likely. He texted you about it awhile ago. Nayeon is probably there, too.
“Hi, pretty girl.”
Again with the nickname and the slight way his eyes are hooded as he said it. If you squint enough, maybe you could tell if he’s drunk or not. You’re not sure. But the way that’s his instant words upon seeing you is making you feel a little weird in your stomach. He’s got to stop calling you that.
“Are you drunk-calling me right now…?"
He shakes his head and says something, but you don’t hear it, so you informed him so. The screen shows you dark, pixelated images, making you think he’s probably moving his camera around, and you could make out that he’s walking away from the party as the loud music fades out eventually.
"I’m not drunk.” He says after he settles on a spot.
“Oh, okay.” You nod. You shifted on your side. “Why did you call me?"
He laughs at that. "I can’t call you?"
His laughter intensifies when he sees you roll your eyes. "No. I’m just wondering… aren’t you at a party?"
Jungkook nods his head. "Yes, but it’s getting boring here."
"Oh.”
Another beat of silence, but Jungkook is the one to say another word.
“Hey, do you wanna go out for a drive?"
Well… that sounds good. You just finished a write-up and did some studying a little earlier and you also planned to order food but forgot about it.
"Sure.”
Jungkook smiles at that.
“I’ve been wanting to show you something. I think you’ll like it."
Your eyebrow arched at that. This is getting a little too new. He’s driven you around before but it always involved fucking, not done with the intention to show you something. Not that you aren’t expecting sex tonight, though. You would actually appreciate that.
"What is it?"
You could make out a smirk from Jungkook’s face on the slightly pixelated screen. "I’m going to show you the real me.” The glint of mischief in his tone cracks you up, so you played right into it,
“Ohhh, does it involve dead bodies?"
He nods with a serious face. "Yes, but you have to promise me you won’t freak out."
"Yeah, and don’t you freak out if I tell the police about it.” You squint your eyes, trying to give him a scolding look.
“Ah,” Jungkook leans back. “You would do that, wouldn’t you? You’re always such a good girl."
It wouldn’t have meant anything if it wasn’t for the way his voice drops, giving you a meaningful look again. You could feel the heat in your cheeks but you shrug it off.
"I am a good girl, I pride myself for it."
Jungkook finally laughs this time, finding this conversation hilarious just as you do. "I know, I like it most especially—"
After all this time, you developed a sort of a Spidey sense for when Jungkook is about to say perverted things, so before he could make such remarks, you cut him off.
"If you’re gonna say something sexual I’m going to end this call.” But even you could tell it was an empty threat.
Jungkook thinks so, too, you know that, but he decides to step back. “I was just going to say that I like it most especially because it does good to the world."
The mirth in his eyes tells you otherwise.
"You do not think that.” You say, rolling your eyes.
He laughs once more, throwing his head back as if you said the funniest joke in the world. Weirdo.
“Alright, alright. So I’m coming to your place in five minutes to pick you up. How does that sound?"
"Good. Nayeon’s currently out… just text me if you get here."
He told you to end the call – which you argued you were just planning to do so and he didn’t need to tell you and it earned a laugh from him, how stubborn you were about such simple things. You just gave him a baleful look.
Just as you pick out a sweatshirt and some sweats in exchange for your pajama dress, you receive a text from Jungkook that he’s arrived and so you grab your wallet and keys and your phone, heading out.
You spot his car and knock on the passenger’s seat window and Jungkook immediately opens it for you.
"Hi, gorgeous.” He greets you. “You want to keep the window open?"
"Hello. Yes, please.” You say, fixing your seat belt.
He hums and you press on a button to slide the window open.
“You want to pick up some food?"
You perked up. "Yeah, I was planning to get some but I was too lazy to order in earlier."
Jungkook pressed some buttons again you don’t really understand but it got music to start playing, lights in the car moving into the same beat of the tune (his car was really fancy…). Some mellow ones you kind of liked during this drive on a cold night. He saw a food place from around a corner and you both agreed to get food from the shop.
He parked somewhere for you guys to open up the take-out. There’s some steamed tofu there so you pick it up and start eating.
"I’ve been obsessed with tofu these days,” you shared absentmindedly, chewing on said food.
Jungkook looks at the tofu you were eating. “Really? I remember when you said you dislike it."
"Yeah, but that’s because I cooked it one time and it sucked."
"I should teach you to cook one of these days…” you refused to acknowledge what that entails and laughed instead.
“You know how?” You said to tease, but you also genuinely can’t believe he knows how.
Jungkook clicks his tongue, a faux offended look on his face, saying, “Why do I always get that reaction? Of course I know how to cook."
"Huh,” you pondered. “Wouldn’t have expected it from you."
"Yeah, yeah, I know. But I have this friend who’s a really good cook and I kinda learned through him."
"That’s cute. Nayeon knows how to cook and I never learned shit from it.” You laugh at your own words, so does Jungkook. “But hey,"
"Hm?"
"Do you think my boobs got bigger? I think they got bigger.” You put your food down your lap and caress your breasts through your clothes.
You’ve been thinking about it since last week. Earlier, you saw yourself naked in your mirror and noticed a change in their size. You almost thought you were pregnant but your period literally just ended yesterday. But can that happen with pregnancies? But… you’re very diligent with your pills… so it can’t be. Right?
You made a mental note to buy a test tomorrow.
“Look the same to me.” Jungkook says, looking at your chest.
You grab his free hand and put it over a boob. He squeezes it promptly, and you hear an almost dramatic gasp.
“Oh, they are bigger."
You remove his hand over you and nod. "Yeah. But I think it’s just due to some hormonal changes. Also I think I’m putting on weight, I’ve been eating a lot these days… but… it’s stupid but I also think my obsession with tofu has something to do with it,"
Jungkook looks over at you curiously.
"Yeah, they say tofu makes your boobs bigger." You added.
He arches a brow at that. "Really?"
"Don’t look so excited."
Jungkook can’t help but huff out a laugh. "I do not!” You roll your eyes. He insists, “I love your boobs the way they are."
"Geez, thanks."
You finished your food and Jungkook drove around again. It’s still in the vicinity of your town. The music in his car serves as a lulling noise in the otherwise quiet night. There’s still a lot of cars on the streets, some occasional honking sounds, but you feel really, really nice, most especially when the wind blows a little harsher and it makes your hair go crazy. Jungkook laughs at that too.
It’s later in the night when Jungkook slowed down somewhere, and soon, he was parking at an abandoned house.
As if on cue, you looked at him and said, "So you really are going to show me your literal skeletons."
He laughed at that.
"Nope, sorry to disappoint, princess."
Jungkook gets out of the car and you follow, immediately shivering at the wind. You wished you wore a hoodie instead of this thin, knitted sweatshirt, but you didn’t expect it would be this cold. It was nearing summer and the weather has been inconsistent for the last month.
You look at the abandoned house once again. There were wooden planks nailed on the door, plastic covers draped over the windows, and overall, it just looks really old. Kind of creepy, if you were to be honest.
In your assessment of the house, you don’t notice Jungkook coming to you with two bottles of soju. He brings them up slightly, a grin on his face.
"Drinks?”
“Okay…” you squint your eyes. “Where are we going to do that?"
He gives you a knowing smirk. "Inside."
Jungkook went over the fence with ease and you followed his direction but didn’t do the same thing. He looks back at you. "Hey."
"Are you sure it’s safe?” You ask, looking around, wrapping your arms around your middle because of the cold.
Jungkook probably notes the genuine concern in your tone, that’s why he sets the soju down and comes forward to you, the fence serving as some kind of dramatic border.
“Baby, it’s fine. No one comes around here.” He says but you don’t really feel assured just yet.
“What if someone comes here now? I don’t want to be arrested…"
"No one’s getting arrested,” Jungkook insists. You still look hesitant. “Come on. Really. I’ve been here lotta times, haven’t ever seen anyone here since then."
You look at him. He seems to be telling that truth and well, maybe you’re stupid for believing him but he seemed to know this place well and had been going here for a long time and as far as you know, he doesn’t have criminal records, so…
"Okay, fine.” You give in.
Jungkook immediately grins. “Nice. Here, let me help you.” He leans forward and takes a hold of your hips as you go over the fence. It’s not that high, really, but you let him carry you over it until you both entered the abandoned property.
When he puts you down, you tug at his shirt.
“Wait, your car.” you gasp.
“Oh, it’s fine. I parked it at that green house, someone’s just gonna assume it’s theirs.” He says, completely nonchalant about it.
You think he’s being careless about his fucking Benz but whatever.
Jungkook leads you to the back of the creepy house and the eerie place immediately gives you goosebumps. The cold of the night does not help, either, so you cling to him until he sits on the ground.
“Jungkook, that’s dirty.” You tell him, trying to tug him up.
He chuckles. “It’s fine, princess. Come here, I’ll take my jacket off. Sit beside me.” Indeed, he takes off his jacket, and you worry he might be cold with his t-shirt only now but you also really don’t want to sit on the ground…
“You’re not cold?” You make sure as you sit beside him. Jungkook opens one of the soju and offers it to you. You take it as he opens another one for himself.
“Nah, it’s fine.” Jungkook starts drinking but even though you have one in your hand, you don’t. He must’ve noticed it as he says, “Hey. Relax.”
“Aside from my fear of getting arrested, it’s also really fucking creepy here.” You retort, scooting closer to him. You got to be honest and admit that you’re more scared of the place than scared of getting arrested.
Jungkook throws his head back to laugh at that. “Again, we’re not getting arrested. And what do you mean creepy? You don’t like it here?"
You look around the place more. "Eh, it’s okay. I just can’t help but think what if there are lost souls around here…” you trailed off, giving him a baleful look when that only made him laugh more. They were quiet laughter, though. Probably to not disrupt said souls.
“You believe those?"
You roll your eyes. "Okay, cool macho guy."
"No, no, I’m sorry,” Jungkook still laughs in between his words and you whisked his hand away in an act of lighthearted sulking when it tried to reach you.
Okay. You don’t exactly believe in ghosts but it’s hard not to when it’s in the middle of the night and quiet and cold and you’re in an abandoned house. You avoid horror movies for a valid reason.
“Alright, let’s cuddle so you don’t get scared.” Jungkook says, but there’s a teasing sound to it.
“Don’t make fun.” You glared at him.
“I’m serious, come here.” He opens his arms wide and you roll your eyes, not moving to come closer. He laughs when even after seconds passed you still didn’t give in. You thought he was giving up but instead he twisted to your direction and let both his legs crowd you so that you’re in between them.
“You’re annoying,” you say but you kind of feel oddly comforted by being close to him like that, and Jungkook must’ve known as well because he just gives you a smug smile, chugging on his soju after.
You did the same. You try to throw away your nerves and scary thoughts, letting yourself relax as he said. When you kind of did a moment later, you find that it’s kind of nice, actually.
“What do you think?” Jungkook suddenly speaks.
“Hm?"
"It’s nice here, right?” He arched his brow at you. “Just try not to think about ghosts."
You pinch his shin through his cargo pants and he gives you a very ingenuine, "Ouch!"
"Except for the ugly house, it’s nice here.” You reply. As you look up, you see stars scattered across the dark skies. It was quite a view, honestly. Makes you a little surprised because it was so beautiful. You almost missed Jungkook’s words.
“Yeah. It’s not exactly beautiful here but it’s a great place to think."
"Think?"
Jungkook sees your teasing smile and shakes his head. "Yes, baby, I do a lot of those."
You chuckle at that and drink more of your alcohol.
You don’t exchange more words after that but you find that it wasn’t awkward. It was just… a nice silence. A comfortable one. With Jungkook crowding you with his legs, you feel like you might be the most relaxed you’ve ever been in the past few months.
You twist yourself so now you’re not facing forward anymore, but to Jungkook. You realize if he’d been looking forward he just had a view of your side profile. You try not to think too much if he just stared at you, although you did feel him do that for a few minutes a while ago.
"Hey, congrats on the game.” You tell him with a soft smile on your face, placing your drink on the ground. It’s still filled in half. You could finish it but you doubt you wouldn’t be drunk by that time. Your alcohol tolerance is not at all exemplary.
“Thanks.” Jungkook sheepishly smiles at you. “You watched it?"
"Ah, no. I just heard about it. I don’t really know anything about basketball so…” you trail off, noting the way he nods at your words.
“Right. I’ve never seen you watch us before.”
You try to joke, “That’s because you never invite me to any of your games."
But it looks like that caught him off guard. "I– huh?” The look on his eyes tells you that he was genuinely surprised at your words, those eyes of him looking like a deer’s when it’s caught in the headlights.
You laugh. “I’m just kidding. I don’t usually watch sports games. Too crowded for my liking."
Jungkook nodded at that, but he still looked taken aback from your words earlier. You really were just kidding. You hope he didn’t take it seriously. But he agrees with you, anyway. "Yeah, it can get crowded sometimes."
Silence and then after a few beats, Jungkook speaks again.
"Hey, let’s make out."
You arched a brow but didn’t really find any reason to oppose it, so you went ahead and kissed him.
Jungkook immediately holds your hips. On the other hand, you snake your arms around his neck, kneeling in between his spread legs. The kiss starts slow but he holds the back of your neck and deepens it.
You whimpered when he nudged your legs with his free hand, and your shock made you break away from the kiss. Jungkook took it as an opportunity to start pecking your neck, though, his hand seemingly coaxing you to open your legs. You got the message and finally straddled his waist, Jungkook groaning and you moaning when you feel your crotches connecting at the action.
He was already sporting a semi, and you also feel your panties getting slick from the way he kissed and bit and licked and soothed your neck.
"Jungkook,” you moaned, searching for his mouth.
He kissed you again, all tongue and so sloppy, his hand reaching for the hem of your sweatshirt and creeping inside it to find you not wearing a bra. He did think you weren't wearing one when you put his hand on your boob in the car earlier.
“Ah, fuck,” he squeezed your tit in his hand, you whine. “They really are bigger. Can I see them, baby?"
You nodded, not even giving it a solid thought as Jungkook immediately hiked up your top until your perky breasts were all bare for him to see.
And devour, eventually.
Jungkook went straight to sucking your boob and squeezing the other to tend to it, massaging it in his huge palm. He licked a nipple and bit at it slightly, making you sigh at his action. Your arms went to his head to fist his hair in your hands.
His ministrations on your chest encouraged you to roll your hips against his pelvis, and that elicited a grunt from him. Smiling a little at that, you experimented on doing it a little harder, and as a result, Jungkook tugged at your nipple, making you whine a little too loud.
"Behave."
You pout. "I want to fuck."
"It’s not so creepy here anymore?” He had the audacity to tease, but his hands were still on your breasts, fondling them.
“I didn’t say we can fuck here. Just…” you looked around, not really specifically looking for something.
Now that Jungkook mentioned it again, you get reminded that it really is creepy as fuck here. And you still didn’t trust the ground. There was no way you could stand fucking in this property. And what if something scary happens while you’re in the middle of doing it…
Just as you were thinking it, a strange sound catches both of your attention.
“I think we should get back in your car.” You decided.
Probably seeing the flash of fear in your eyes, Jungkook laughs. “Are you thinking of ghosts again?"
You slap his chest. "No. But I want to cum."
"So demanding,” he playfully scolds but you just roll your eyes and let your sweatshirt fall to cover you up once again. You immediately cling to him the moment he stands up and help him pick up the soju bottles, anxiously praying you guys hurry up to get out of here.
“It was just the wind.” Jungkook comforts you once you were on your way to his car.
As far as you’re concerned, it’s never just the wind. At least those shitty horror movies you and your cousins watched during sleepovers tell you so.
Jungkook opens the door to the backseat and you go in and he follows after you.
You immediately straddle him once he’s seated, earning a chuckle from him.
“Wow, you’re really eager for me to fuck the fear out of you, huh?” He says, sounding smug about the way you reach for the hem of your shirt and removing it from yourself.
“Hm. Your dirty talk these days have been subpar.” you slide his jacket off of him and he lets you remove his shirt as well, laughing more at your impatience.
“Can’t think straight when a pretty girl is on my lap."
Before you could say something about that, he gripped your waist and got you off his lap, manhandling you to lay on the backseat. Your back is against the car door as Jungkook twisted in his seat, hauling himself backwards to pull your sweats down and take off your birkens. Leaning down, Jungkook pressed open-mouthed kisses up your thighs, teasing his mouth on where you need him the most.
But you didn’t want to feel anything there other than his cock, and you tell him so.
"Jungkook,” you whine, catching his attention. When he looks up at you, you whine some more, “Just fuck me. I’m so wet already."
He cursed, caressing the sides of your thighs. "Baby, I need to prep you.”
“There’s no need for that, come on, please. I need your cock."
Jungkook groans. But then he makes quick work of unzipping his pants, pulling it down with his boxers until his dick is out. It’s plenty hard already, the shiny tip catching your attention.
You let out another cry at the sight of him gripping his base, pumping it for a few seconds and finally pushing your panties to the side and slipped inside you. True to your words, it was quite an easy slide, but the burn still stings a little bit. His size was on the little above average spectrum and you’ve always found a hard time taking it in smoothly.
"Oh, god,” you mewl, grasping his bicep while your other hand grips the back seat.
Jungkook tightened his fingers on your waist, a hand coming up to one of your thighs to wrap it around his middle. You follow his silent command, welcoming the hot kiss he gives you.
“Should I move now?” He whispers in your mouth, and you nod frantically, throwing your head back with a moan when he does as told.
His cock was not even pulled out completely before he slipped it in again, slowly, in agonizing deep strokes. Like he wants to feel every corner of your warm hole.
“So good…” you moaned, tightening your thigh around his body.
“You like when I fuck you slow, baby?” Jungkook pressed kisses on your chest this time, and you could only nod your head mindlessly as he repeated thrusting out again.
“I – ah… so good, Kook. I love it,"
The car is cramped and all you could hear are your heavy breaths and the lewd squelching sound of his cock going in and out of your pussy, his chain dangling in between your bodies feels cold when it momentarily touches your chest.
You would tell him to go faster, harder, but the way he was planting fairy kisses on your skin and his tattooed arm popping veins on the side of your head as if he was finding it hard to not fuck you stupid, you found that his deep and precise albeit slow strokes great.
"So pretty,” he says, moving the strands of hair that stuck everywhere on your face.
“K-kook,” you whimper.
“Hm? Baby? What is it?” Jungkook looks at you with an uncharacteristically soft gaze, his dick still continuing its slow pace in your cunt.
“M-my back hurts like this,” you say.
His eyes look softer at your words, expression gentle. “Sorry, angel.” He caresses your face and kisses you which you welcomed with a sob when his dick hits deeper after he leaned down. “Here, I’ll sit here. Straddle me.” But he doesn’t even wait for you to move as he hauls you to his lap himself, his cock still inside you, feeling it twitching when you sit on it outright.
“Good girl,” Jungkook squeezes your breasts and laps at them, only to look up at you again. “You okay?"
You nod, pushing him slightly so that he relaxes his back against the seat. You brace yourself on his chest and begin to bounce on his cock.
Jungkook throws his head back, letting you on your own pace, hands gripping your hips to help you move.
"So fucking good for me,” he hissed just as when you mewled when his cock hits a particular spot in you. “Take it easy, baby, nice and slow, okay?” He said, taking a hold on the back of your head and pulling you in for a slow kiss.
You followed his words and planted your knees on either side of him, going down steadily, crying out at the way you feel every ridge of his huge cock inside you like this.
It was so pleasurable, the way he groaned in your ears, squeezing your breasts, tugging at your sensitive nipples, murmuring stupid, sweet nothings, his cock seemingly growing larger in your heat each second passed, and soon, you feel that knot in your stomach ready to burst.
“I-I’m cumming, Kook, I’m cumming–"
Jungkook hummed, and when he felt your movements stuttering, he took it upon himself to press his thumb to your clit, rubbing the bundle of nerves and fucking his dick up into you, your eyes rolling to the back of your head as your orgasm snap.
"So good for me, baby, fuck, you’re such a good girl for me.” He kept rubbing delicious shapes on your clit, and you had to bite back a pathetic sob as the pleasure started to become too much.
But he was still chasing his high, and you leaned forward to kiss him through it, letting him do whatever he wanted to get himself there.
And when he did cum, you feel yourself cumming a second time too, Jungkook letting out strings of curses and nonsense as he feels you dripping more juices down onto his cock.
Your head falls on the crook of his neck, Jungkook caressing your back as he relaxes on the seat.
For a while, words were not spoken. He kept kissing your hair while you felt him twitching in your pussy.
“I’m so tired,” you wearily peeled your face from his neck, looking at him. He has his eyes shut close, but there’s a content smile on his face that you leaned down to kiss. You didn’t know what for, you just felt like kissing him.
Jungkook hums. The mess in your crotch starts to feel sticky and cold and uncomfortable.
“Let’s stay like this for a while.” He says, as if he could read that you were about to get off his lap.
You chuckle. “I can literally feel you going soft."
"Ignore my dick. I wanna feel you a little more."
"Okay."
Jungkook does an unexpected thing of kissing your forehead. You choose to ignore the weird tingling feeling in your stomach and the way your cheeks feel hot at the action, just let him slip his fingers through your hair and rest your cheek on his naked chest.
You eventually got off of each other after a few minutes, and you both were quiet as you dressed yourselves back. Jungkook and you got out of his car so he could drive and you could enter the passenger’s seat.
The drive to your place was quiet but the silence was nice and comfortable, just like when you were at the back of that creepy old house. Jungkook occasionally sang along to some of the songs playing from a random playlist he pulled up on Spotify, and his voice sounded kind of nice. You wanted to say something about it but decided not to, in slight fear that he would stop.
When he pulled over in front of your complex, there was a soft, gentle smile on his face when he told you, "Sweet dreams."
Your face mirrored his as you wished him good night.
You locked the door to your apartment, ignoring the strange feeling in your stomach.
You found yourselves at that abandoned house again the next night and Jungkook forewent the booze and brought junk food from Wendy’s. You had a swell time just sitting with each other at the back of the house, talking about the most random things you could talk about like some silly childhood memories. You almost shared your joy upon finding out that you weren’t actually pregnant after taking the test earlier that day just like you said you would the other night, but you found it better to keep that to yourself.
Additionally, you ranted to him about Professor Kang for giving you a C+ on a project you thought you deserved a higher grade for. Jungkook showed blind support by roasting your professor’s haircut. You didn’t fuck that night but did it the next night after a few drinks.
When the day of their second game of Finals hit, your Uni won again and Jungkook ditched the after-game party, picking you up and driving you to that place. Almost like it became tradition.
This time, you think you went overboard with the drinks, but it was probably just your shitty alcohol tolerance because Jungkook was standing still with his third bottle – which you childishly argued was unfair.
Jungkook carried you like a sack of potatoes on your way to his car, ignoring how you slapped his ass. But you were all giggles and hushed whispers in the backseat as Jungkook guided your hips, bouncing you on his cock, just like the other night.
"How does it feel, baby?” Jungkook whispered against your mouth while you gripped his shoulders hard to slide up and down his cock, the tops of your feet resting on his thighs.
“S-so good,” you whimpered, speeding up, feeling yourself getting close to your edge.
Jungkook tightened his hands on your waist but didn’t really do anything to control your movements or pace like he usually would. Like he was just enjoying you on top of him, using his cock to get off.
You leaned down to kiss him, your moan upon feeling him deeper getting swallowed by the way he immediately reciprocated your touch.
You opened your eyes but then you suddenly caught a glimpse of a car. You pulled away from the kiss, but Jungkook took it as an opportunity to kiss your neck instead. While he was busy lapping up your skin, you narrowed your eyes to see clearer, only to realize that the car you saw was a fucking police cruiser.
“Jungkook,” you called him, stopping your movements on his lap.
“Baby,” Jungkook’s voice nearly sounded like a whine, understandably confused at your action– or lack thereof.
But you only tapped his shoulder a little harder.
“There’s a damn cruiser in front of us."
Well, it wasn’t actually in front of you. It was more like, parked across from you, beside that abandoned house.
Jungkook seemed to realize your panic though. His car wasn’t lit because you immediately got into it the moment he put you in the backseat. It was a little inconvenient especially when you were slipping him in but it turned to be a blessing in disguise because whoever owned that cruiser wouldn't have noticed what you were doing in his car.
"Shit."
You hastily climbed off of him, quickly finding your shorts on the floor of the car and sliding it on while seated. Meanwhile, Jungkook just tucked his dick in his boxers and zipped up his pants. It was pure luck that you didn’t completely strip each other off earlier because it made for a fast dress up.
"Wait.” Jungkook leaned over the center part of the car and stayed a few seconds hunched over the console. You were just about to ask him what he was doing when the passenger’s seat suddenly reclined back.
“Oh."
"We can climb over here so that we don’t have to go out and have a cop seeing us. It would be suspicious.” He suggested, and you quickly nodded and did what he told you with a little bit of his help.
Jungkook pressed a button once again that had the driver’s seat this time leaning back, just like yours did. He climbed over it just as fast, putting on his seatbelt that you remember you needed to do as well so you followed.
He lit on the car and started the engine. But before he could drive, a knock on his window made you both look at it.
“Fuck.”
You held your breath as you watched his window slowly sliding down, revealing a police decked in his uniform hunching down to see the inside of the car.
“Evening, officer.” Jungkook greets casually. You didn’t know what to do. You reached for the phone in your pocket and turn it on, ducking down as much as you could so as to hide your face, trying to seem busy and casual.
“Oh, it’s just some kids, Hwang,” The cop turned to the side, and that’s when you heard another set of footsteps coming towards you. “You kids live here?"
"Yeah. It’s my parents’ house, I’m just about to drive my girlfriend home.” Jungkook answered, referring to the green house he parked at, not a hint of hesitation or even an ounce of nervousness in his demeanor.
You were too frozen to react to the way he called you his girlfriend.
The other cop nodded. “Apologies. We were just roaming. Be careful, kid, you got a sleek car. There’s some thief on the loose around the street."
Jungkook nodded as well, even did a little salute as he said, "You got it, sir."
The cop patted the top of his car and Jungkook bid them a final goodbye before closing his window again and driving away.
You felt like your soul just went right back inside you after it got out for a moment there.
"Holy shit, that was the craziest thing I’ve ever done.”
“Really?”
“Yes!”
And then suddenly, you giggled. Actually, like, giggled. Because realizing what just happened, you found every single thing fucking hilarious. You got away from cops!
“Oh my god, Jungkook. That was insane!” You said in between your laughter.
Jungkook looked over at you before training his attention to the road and finally laughing with you, seemingly finding what happened just as hilarious. “Yeah. It was, it was.”
“And they really believed you! I can’t believe it,” you covered your face with both of your hands, your belly starting to hurt with how much you found the whole thing incredulous that it was funny.
“It’s not like we did anything wrong…” Jungkook said but he had a hint of playful tone when he spoke the words.
You snorted. “Well, in between public indecency and trespassing, which do you think they would most likely arrest us for?"
That got Jungkook to laugh again.
During the ride to your place, you complained about feeling too cold at one point. Jungkook asked if you wanted him to turn the A/C down but you shook your head and so he offered his jacket instead because you only wore a shirt. In your defense, when he picked you up, the weather was humid even though it was late at night.
You didn’t stop talking and laughing about what happened earlier, though. You found it hard to let go of it just like that.
"You are so drunk,” Jungkook chuckled as he pulled over. “You’re going to regret it tomorrow."
"It’s Saturday tom–” you cut yourself off with a yawn.
“You’re cute when you’re drunk.” Jungkook commented, pulling over, indicating that you were near your apartment. You didn’t even notice.
“Not drunk, just tipsy.” You said, starting to unbuckle your seat belt but you kept on failing. Your tipsiness was starting to kick in again and everything was a little too hazy in your head.
You still definitely are aware about your surroundings, so aware that you felt Jungkook hunching over your side to unbuckle your seat belt for you, so close that you felt his breath fanning your face.
“Thanks.” You smiled, he returned it.
You opened the door yourself this time, though, and was only a little surprised to see Jungkook getting out of his car too.
“Let me walk you to your door."
And honestly, you should be worried about the possibility of Nayeon being at the apartment and seeing you together, but you couldn’t really bring yourself to care when all you could feel was odd content in feeling Jungkook’s presence as you walked towards your place.
It was quiet but it was comfortable. You noticed how it’s always been like that with him, especially these days.
When you reached your door, you turned to Jungkook who was a little behind you, probably slowed his steps when you neared your place.
“Thanks for walking me."
"No biggies,” Jungkook grins and then he stares at you for a while.
“What?” You asked.
He leans down, holds your hip and presses his mouth against your own.
Surprisingly, you didn’t really make a big deal out of it in your head when you were supposed to because this has never happened before: Jungkook walking you to your door and kissing you before he leaves has never occurred before.
And yet, it felt so normal. Like it was just something that happens on the daily. Like you were so used to feeling his casual and soft kisses instead of the passionate and hard ones that often led to something.
“See you next week?"
You nod, biting your lip as he lets you go. "Yeah."
Jungkook gives you a one, last small smile before he turns around and goes to his car, entering it and driving away from your complex.
What a crazy night.
You did not want to admit it, but maybe the strange feeling in your stomach the other night was goddamn butterflies.
You really weren’t supposed to come with.
But Juyeon, your editor in chief, told you to accompany Ryujin as she goes to interview the basketball team for their second win at the Finals season today. Your responsibility told you that it was fine, which, really is fine because you were used to monitoring freshmen in the club and that was actually one of your official jobs as the managing director but!
You were basically gonna do a babysitting job because Ryujin apparently fucked a guy from the team after she interviewed them the first time and it resulted to a poor article, and as a result, Juyeon is afraid she’s gonna fuck up her future write-ups so you’re the collateral damage of the whole situation.
Juyeon didn’t tell you that herself, though. Keeping things professional and decent. You heard it from the other members of the club.
Right now, you have to be at the gymnasium to meet people you’ve never really bothered meeting before and have always avoided for obvious reasons.
But it was fine.
You checked Ryujin’s questions on the way there and when you arrived, she immediately tried to spot the team’s coach to talk to him about the interview she was gonna conduct.
Instantly, you felt a prickling sensation on your arms and the back of your neck as the varsity players stopped on their tracks to look at the newcomers. At this hour, you can see no one at the gym seats. You and Ryujin were the only civilians and they noticed that immediately.
It’s as if you couldn’t help it, but you spotted Jungkook on one of the benches drinking water. As if on cue, he met your gaze, and you could see the little surprise he had on his face seeing you. However, you quickly looked away and walked towards where the coach and Ryujin were.
"I’m here with our managing director, too. She’s here to help me with the interview.” Ryujin told the coach, all smiles.
“Good day, sir.” You greeted him. He nodded at you in acknowledgement and turned to look at his team.
“Alright,” The coach loudly said, which got the players to transfix their attention to him instead. You tried not to notice Jungkook looking at you as he walked towards your direction, the other members doing the same. Coach stood straight and elaborated, “The school’s publication is here to interview you about the previous game you’ve had. Practice ends here–” he was cut off by the collective loud cheers from the guys. He shook his head. “But put on your best behavior."
"Guaranteed, coach.” Someone said but you saw how he sent a wink to Ryujin’s way.
Jesus Christ, where even was the subtlety? It was such a boy-ish thing to do. If you could, you would roll your eyes. Wait – was it the guy she fucked on that interview? Ugh. You couldn’t really bring yourself to care. It was her sex life… just maybe she shouldn’t mix it with her journalism activities…
“Careful, Kang. I’m gonna make you do ten laps if you don’t give these writers some good material,” The coach warned and some of them snorted. He then turned to both of you and Ryujin. “These guys are very rowdy but you guys will be fine."
You try to smile at him as he bids his goodbye and leaves the gym. Taejun, the senior sports journalist had already interviewed him so Ryujin only had to do it with the players themselves so they could collaborate on the article.
Ryujin enthusiastically greeted the team and introduced herself, as well as you. You offered them a small smile and was only a little taken aback when Taehyung chirped your name.
"Hi, Taehyung.” you return his greeting.
He grins at you.
Ryujin looks at you immediately. “Oh, you know someone here?"
Yeah, technically you knew of some people here. You knew Taehyung though, and you knew Jungkook. But you chose to just nod instead of saying anything.
Ryujin lets out a happy noise. "That’s so cool!"
Yeah…
"Hey, surprised to see you here,” Taehyung walked up to you. “I thought you weren’t in the sports section?”
You were surprised to know that Taehyung even remembers what you told him a long time ago. You got to know each other that much during the time you were constantly talking.
“Well, yes. Ryujin is a freshman, though. I take care of them sometimes, you can say.” You replied.
Taehyung nodded in understanding. “You’re gonna be here for a while?"
"We’ll see. But I think the interview will be a quick one."
Someone from the team called Taehyung and he looked at you apologetically. You nodded with a smile.
"We always seem so busy whenever we see each other,” Taehyung shakes his head with a laugh. You find that quite funny too. “Hey, do you wanna catch up? Get some coffee around."
"Oh, yeah, sure. But I bet your sched is crazy these days.” you said, alluding to their constant practices for Finals season.
“Nah, I can make time. Unless you have a crazy sched too?” He gave you a playful smile.
You cocked your head to the side, squinting your eyes at him. “Not all of us are trying to get our school a big trophy."
Taehyung laughed at that and his teammates called for him again, this time it was Jungkook. You both looked at him. He had a strange look on his face but you shrugged it off.
"Well, I better get going. Ryujin’s starting.” He said and pointed back with his thumb.
The boys were kind of rowdy in the start, but they eventually scattered around the benches doing their own thing as Ryujin talked to them individually, especially the ones who usually play in court.
You offered to take some of your own notes, too, were kind of bothered that you didn’t really understand some of the terms used and that this was very unusual territory for you to get a material at for writing an article. You never really dabbled on sports writing.
Eventually, you felt your bladder looking for relief so you told Ryujin that you would be back in a minute.
It was a little difficult to find the comfort room but you did see it in the far corner of the hallway, a few steps away from the gymnasium.
You were washing your hands on the communal sink after peeing when the door suddenly opened, revealing Jungkook in his jersey.
Hand clutching your chest, you looked at him with a scandalized expression.
“Jesus,” you squint your eyes. “Why are you here?”
Jungkook closes the door and saunters towards the room. “No greetings or anything?"
You give him an eyeroll and come back to washing your hands as soon as you get over the initial shock of seeing him.
You simply shrug.
In a second, Jungkook was beside you.
"We haven’t seen each other in a while,” he said, giving you a playful nudge.
You whisk your hands, ridding the wetness out of your hands.
“It’s only been three days."
You see him smile at you through the mirror, and he has that soft look again on his face. You get reminded of your last night together. When he kissed you good night as he dropped you home.
"I was surprised to see you there,” Jungkook says, turning around and leaning back on the counter.
You think he’s referring to seeing you at the gym and that makes you chuckle. Why was everyone surprised to see you at the gym? “Why, you think you guys own the gym or something?"
Jungkook found your sass amusing, though.
"Come on, you know what I mean."
You playfully narrowed your eyes at him but ended up laughing for no reason other than he also laughed.
"Eh, duty calls. Our EIC had me accompany Ryujin, so...” you see Jungkook nodding. You swerve the topic to the next one. “Your big game starts in, like, five days from now.” You mirror his stance and also lean back on the counter.
Jungkook watched as you did so. “Yeah.”
His eyes are trained on yours, and you hold a weird, intense stare until he finally peels himself off from the counter and walks to you. You’re surprised that you’ve never thought about him in his jersey but you were able to see him earlier like this before and right now, in your close up view, damn. He looked good. Especially with his tattoos all out like that. You really like them. They looked pretty.
“It’s probably gonna be the last game,” you said, referring to the fact that they’ve won the last two games and if they win this one, it would be the concluding point of the Finals season. “You’re going to make the Uni proud?” You arched a brow at him.
He shrugged. And finally, he crossed the small distance between you and held your hips. You think you unintentionally let out a happy hum at the contact. You’ve been wanting him to touch you as soon as you saw him earlier. For some weird reason.
“Sure, but only if you’re there for me to give me my personal reward,” The lewd undertone was not lost on you and it made you giggle. Somehow, he’d gotten even closer, fingers caressing your hips in soothing circles. “You look good, by the way. This skirt is new?"
It is new. You try not to think too much about what it says about you that you kind of thought of him when you placed the order a week ago. It was just a blip of thought, anyway. You swear.
"Yes. And you’re kinda sweaty,” He really is. But it doesn’t stop you from looping your arms around his neck and Jungkook is only visibly satisfied at the close proximity.
“Hard at work,” he leans down, but he only nudges your nose. “Can I see your panties?"
You would have scolded yourself for giggling like a school girl at that question, but Jungkook must’ve realized how stupid that sounded too as he laughed together with you.
"I don’t know, you’re gonna have to do it yourself. I think.” You whispered, playing into the joke.
You saw his smirk before he finally closed the hairsbreadth gap between you and touched your mouth against his. He prodded at the seam of your lips with his tongue and you let him access, his tongue swirling with your own as you shared a rather passionate kiss in the sink.
There was a string of saliva between your mouths when he broke free.
“God, I missed your taste.”
It was his last words before he dove in again, kissing you way deeper now, more frantic as well, as he started getting handsy. At some point, his hands on your hips lifted you up until you were seated on the counter, Jungkook kissing you like it hasn’t only been three days since he had you like this. He squeezed your bare thighs that got you whimpering, your hips, waist. Up, up, and up until he was copping a feel on your boobs through your clothes.
He was kissing your neck when you suddenly felt him untucking your shirt from your skirt.
“Wait, no,” You tried to get your head out of your previous headspace and took a hold of his wrists.
“No?” Jungkook stops, looking at you curiously, lips plump, hair a little wild. And with his stupid basketball uniform, it was extremely hard to discourage his advances.
But…
“Someone might come in,” you say with genuine worry in your voice, pushing him away slightly.
“There’s not really a lot of people who come to this bathroom,” he tells you. Which, you think, kind of makes sense. Him and his teammates have their locker rooms and their own comfort room that was an extension of the gym (which you pointedly didn’t go to for obvious reasons) and this part of the campus was a little quiet.
But then again, you did tell Ryujin you would be back in a minute. And it would be quite ironic if Juyeon told you to monitor her because she fucked someone in the team while you go ahead and fail to do that job because you were fooling around with another someone from the same team.
Jesus. That’s enough crisis for today.
“Ryujin’s probably going to interview you soon,” you said, tucking your shirt back into your skirt.
You jump slightly to step on the floor, turning around to fix your hair, seeing Jungkook stepping back through the mirror. “Why did you leave the gym, by the way?"
Jungkook invades your personal space again and presses himself to your back. "I got excited when I saw you…” he whispers in your ear and your whimper betrays your resistance from literally a few seconds ago as you feel something hard on your ass.
But at the same time, you look at him incredulously through the mirror. He just shrugs as he sees it, gripping your hips again and burrowing his face on the crook of your neck.
“Kook,” you whine.
Jungkook chuckled and before you can do something stupid like give in to his touch, he leaned back and held his hands up.
“Fine, fine,” he says, still laughing when you turn around to glare at him. “Can I see you later?"
You jab at his chest lightly. "For being annoying just right now, you can’t "
His face contorts and pouts. "Aw, come on,"
You roll your eyes at his dramatic antics.
"We can’t get into anything tonight. Nayeon is staying at home and I’m nervous about her seeing your car if you pick me up,” you tell him. “Also, we can’t go to that place. That cruiser might be back again."
"Yeah, yeah,” Jungkook agrees. “We can just go together to my place after this, though? It would be late by the time your friend is finished with the interview."
You look at him funny.
He sighs. "Damn, I thought I could finally convince you to fuck at my place."
You shake your head. "Never.”
From the start, you both agreed to only fuck at your place (whenever Nayeon is not around, of course) per your request. Jungkook lives quite far from the campus, at least far compared to yours, and it was a high complex building. As far as you know, most of the big shots at school live there and he’s neighbors with Taehyung. You don’t want to risk it.
“Never is a long time..” Jungkook wiggles his brows at you and that breaks you from your thoughts.
Laughing, you push at him playfully.
“Gee. You should go. They’re probably now wondering why you’re taking so long."
"They’re probably thinking I’m taking a shit.” he shrugs. “I think I told Taehyung that before I left.”
“Oh no, is that what they’re going to think about me, too?” You gave him an animated concerned look, making your voice purposely higher in pitch.
“Wait, what? You take a shit?” Jungkook playing into the joke caused you to laugh and you punched his bicep that he just took with a grin.
When the laughter died down, Jungkook looked at you seriously.
“When can I see you again?"
"I don’t know. Sometime this week, maybe? Don’t be whiny.” You smile as you see his pout. “Hey, you really should go now."
He looked a little hesitant but he didn’t really have a choice. And you were also growing more concerned that someone from the gym might think maliciously about you and Jungkook disappearing at the same time for a long time. Hopefully, no one cared enough to think about it.
"Alright.” Jungkook says finally and starts to step out. Before he leaves, though, he asks, “Wait, are you going to the game?"
You hope Jungkook doesn’t see the surprise if it showed on your face. You didn’t expect him to ask that.
But you try to play it cool, pondering on it. It’s Wednesday, next week, and as far as you knew, there was nothing major in your schedule. You still don’t know about that, though. Maybe some of your profs would drop a big project on your heads come Monday.
It’s why you were surprised to hear yourself say, "I’ll try."
Jungkook gave you a wide grin before he left completely.
When you got back to the gym, Ryujin was already talking to him.
Jungkook looked at the door when you entered and did a poor job of hiding a smile to himself, and for what reason, you simply didn’t know. But so as you did not know the reason for why you looked too closely at him to even notice that tiny gesture.
For someone who was adamant to see you last week, Jungkook wasn’t really able to snuck in time to do so. You shared texts here and there, but he mentioned that they’ve been practicing nonstop since the past few days because they are preparing for a big game, after all. Might be the last one if they come through and win it.
Come Wednesday, the day of the third game, Jungkook texted you that he got a reserved seat for you at the venue. Your weird giddiness over that was clouded by the worry at the thought of how he managed to do that without anyone suspecting anything about your relationship. You mentally noted to tell him about it later.
When Nayeon came home after classes, she told you she got two tickets for the game if you wanted to come with. You didn’t really need tickets, though, you could just use your journalist card and they would let you in.
See, you had all these resources to go to the game but the thing is, you have a book review and another assignment due tonight and you needed to get some studying done for a test tomorrow. The game starts at 3 pm and will probably end around 6 or even later than that. It’s not that you never procrastinated in your life but you’ve learned over the years to prioritize more important things over the ones that didn’t really need urgency. And this is why you told Nayeon that you couldn’t come with her because of your packed schedule today.
But worry looms over you as you remember how excited Jungkook seemed over your texts earlier when you asked him what you should expect at the game. He told you about how it could be chaotic and noisy and crowded but it was gonna be fun and worth your while, especially if – he jokingly said – he scores a shot for you if you were to be there.
Looking back, you made it sound like you were gonna come but in your defense, you really were going to but these school activities came to you unexpectedly and you didn’t have the luxury of time to set them aside to watch a basketball game first.
And anyway, was it really a big deal if you didn’t come? You don’t think Jungkook would really mind. Maybe his texts went over your head that you thought he was excited at the prospect of you going to his game. You would tell yourself it didn’t matter, and if Jungkook was going to be shit about it (which you doubt, ‘cause he seemed casual about inviting you) then he was weird for being (hypothetically) weird about it. It wasn’t like this was normal for you both, anyway; you going to his games, that is.
So around 2 pm, you messaged him.
[2:06pm] You: Hey, I’m really sorry I can’t go to your game. Swamped with school works, but I wish you good luck :) Go break a leg but hopefully not literally!
It was hard to focus on writing your book review because you couldn’t help but be agitated as you remembered that they air these Finals games on television and you could literally just turn it on and watch it from there. But the empty document on your laptop was glaring at you, like it was daring you to watch TV instead of finishing it.
Of course, you chose to tend to the intimidating clean white MS word page instead. As if you really had a choice in the first place.
At 10 pm, your book review was mostly done and only needed a few touch-ups. You also finished your other assignment so you finally had some time to eat.
You just reheated a leftover pizza from your fridge when you received a text from Nayeon.
[10:11pm] Im Nayeonie: babe im sleeping over at a friend’s so the place is all yours for tonight. don’t forget to lock up ok
[10:11pm] You: Ok! You’ll be back tomorrow morning?
[10:14pm] Im Nayeonie: eh probably around 10am but I’ll see
You remember that she was at the game earlier. It actually slipped off your mind eventually when you got your head in too deep with finishing your assignments, but now that you’re reminded of it again, you wanted to know how it was.
[10:16pm] You: Hey how was the game?
[10:16pm] Im Nayeonie: oh my ur interested in bb now??
[10:17pm] You: Don’t tease! I just wanted to know if you had fun
[10:17pm] Im Nayeonie: ( ͡° ͜ʖ ͡°)
You snort at the ridiculous emoticon.
[10:17pm] You: What the hell does that mean?!
[10:17pm] Im Nayeonie: nothing lmaoooo
[10:18pm] Im Nayeonie: but the game was fine! it was kinda intense but our uni lost unfortunately): they had a three point difference
Oh. You usually didn’t care about any sports games that your Uni has but the news deflated you for some reason.
[10:19pm] You: Ah, thats unfortunate
You replied, finding that you didn’t really know what to say. Should you message Jungkook? But what were you going to say?
[10:19pm] Im Nayeonie: yeah it is it was supposed to be the last game 😖😖 but there’s still 2 more to go anyway im not too worried about it finals went like this last season too
[10:20pm] Im Nayeonie: but jungkook’s buzzer beater at game 4 was really insane it’s like all over on twt IK you proly won’t care about it but ill still send you a link HAHAHAH
Nayeon did send you a link and thankfully you were able to see it even though you didn’t have Twitter, but you looked up "buzzer beater” on Google first. You didn’t understand it completely but slowly did when you played the video she was talking about.
The camera was a bit shaky and the background was expectedly noisy. The angle shifted to the timer on top of the ring and you could see that there was only ten seconds left. When the lens panned to the court, you saw a player wearing your Uni’s colors and you couldn’t have mistaken Jungkook for anyone when you spotted the tattoo sleeve. He was a bit far from the ring, at that curved line – the three-point line, you learned through the replies – but he successfully shot the ball quite gracefully into the ring and everyone just lost it. Even the person behind the video was cheering exuberantly. You could also make out that Jungkook pumped the air at his own shot in triumph as a buzzing sound overtook the screams before the clip ended.
Apparently, they were losing in the fourth game, but Jungkook managed to make a three-point shot in the very literal end which got them a chance to play through the fifth.
You scrolled through the comments and found out that it was indeed a tight game and the other team only had a three-point difference with your Uni’s team, like Nayeon said.
It was amazing, in your opinion, but people online could really be shitty.
Some were mocking Jungkook’s buzzer beater in game 4, saying how it was useless and how he could’ve done it again in game 5 but wasn’t able to. You didn’t know shit about basketball but you were very certain it was a rare thing to do in court so the people who were complaining about it could go fuck themselves.
This is why you avoid social media as much as possible. You hope Jungkook doesn’t see those comments.
You were frowning as you texted Nayeon back.
[10:26pm] You: That was cool
[10:26pm] You: Hey I’ll talk to you soon I’m gonna go eat dinner. Have fun on your sleepover
You weren’t able to see her reply when Jungkook’s name is suddenly plastered all over your screen. You accepted his call on the third ring.
“Hi,” you say. You can’t help but think about the negative comments on Twitter but Jungkook sounded fine when he answered.
“Hi, baby,” he greeted on his end. “Can I see you?"
"Sure,” you answer almost immediately. You composed yourself before continuing. “Nayeon will be out until morning. Come over?"
You can feel his smile through the line as he says, "Nice. Be there in five."
Per his words, Jungkook did arrive in five minutes and when you heard a knock from your front door, you quickly opened it and ushered him inside.
"Hey,” you greet him as he removes his stompers off. He slides on your extra fluffy home slippers, your old one that you have been lending him whenever he would come over. You think it’s kind of funny on his feet because the sliders were too small. “I just finished my leftover pizza for dinner so I don’t have any food right now. Do you want me to order in?"
Jungkook shakes his head. "Nah, I’m not really hungry. Unless you are? Wait, nevermind, I’ll do that."
He takes out his phone but you stop him.
"No, no, it’s fine. I actually ordered Chinese while you were on your way so I could beat you to it.” You tease. But you kind of meant it, honestly. He needs to stop paying for everything. But also, the pizza didn’t cut your hunger and you needed to eat rice, anyway, so you ordered in right after your call with him ended.
Jungkook frowned but then shook his head. “Alright."
"Water?” You asked, going towards the kitchen.
“Yes, please."
He followed you on your way there and when you turned around to give him the glass, he snaked an arm around your waist and kissed you.
It took you by surprise, but you reciprocated immediately. You mirrored his smile when he broke the kiss. He gazed at you, a fond look on his face, and leaned down to press his forehead to yours and said, "Hi."
You giggle. "Hi."
Jungkook presses his mouth on you again and you kiss some more for a little while. It was weird because your kisses usually lead to fucking, but this time it didn’t mean anything other than plain kissing, just for the sake of it. You were reminded of that time in high school when you and your first boyfriend often made out (sloppily) in your room because it was all you were ready to do. Jungkook was far more skilled than said first boyfriend, though. And it felt way nicer with him.
You were the one to pull away, licking your lips and biting the bottom one.
"Do you wanna watch something?"
"Hm. Hopefully you aren’t going to make me watch Legally Blonde again."
Your frown is instant. "I thought you liked that movie?"
Jungkook chuckles and pecks your lips again but you sulk, especially after hearing his next words, "I do, baby. It’s just I’m getting tired of it…” When he sees your frown deepening, he says, “I’m kidding. We can watch it."
"No, I feel betrayed now.” You break free from his hold and down another glass of water.
He laughed and was about to say more when your doorbell rang, indicating the food delivery just arrived. Jungkook was the one to volunteer.
“I’ll go get it."
You turned on the TV in the living room and sat on the couch.
Jungkook followed almost as quickly after you, placing the bags of Chinese food on the coffee table.
"Oh, I think we should watch an Adam Sandlers movie. Just something not so serious.” you said just as when Jungkook sat beside you, remembering about his game earlier. You noted that he seemed to be in a good mood when he came in but you never know, maybe he was good at hiding his real emotions or whatever. And, well, maybe you were a little happy to see him laughing like that with you, despite losing an important game.
“I thought you hated him and his movies?"
You shrug, appreciating that he even remembers that.
"Eh, it’s fine. It's... camp, you know? Sometimes shitty movies are funny because they’re shitty."
After a while, you get reminded why you don’t watch Adam Sandlers movies. Even Jungkook who laughs at the most stupid jokes didn’t find the supposed punchlines of the movie you were watching funny. But somehow, you found yourselves eventually laughing at how unfunny the film was and only a little surprised when you went through the whole Chinese take-outs not even 30 minutes in the movie.
"His movies always make my film maker dreams die.” You comment absentmindedly, drinking your water.
Jungkook looks at you with a surprised expression. “Filmmaker?"
You try to remember if you mentioned it to him in passing before. By the look on his face, it was probably his first time hearing it.
"Yep."
"Oh,” Jungkook nods in thought. “I see you didn’t pursue it."
"Eh, film school is expensive. Also, it’s not a very generous industry for women, so.” You shrug nonchalantly.
It’s a dormant dream for the most part. Sometimes, you want it a lot, but most of the time, not really. Fresh out of high school, you were supposed to major in it but it was way more you could afford, and your family didn't exactly support it. So study education it is. Besides, teaching was a secondary dream that you decided you could pursue, and well, you were doing well with it. These days though, you were planning to go to law school but it's still something you aren't very sure yet.
It’s a drama you don’t want to bother Jungkook with, though. You never had a discussion like this before… and you weren’t really sure if you were ready to open up to someone like that.
“I did videography in first year,” he shares. You arch your brow at that. Obviously you didn’t know. “I liked it and I was going to major in multimedia arts but dad said it was either be a lawyer or a doctor if I don’t do tech."
Ah. An overachiever family, you think. His dad owns a really huge tech company – he didn’t tell you that himself, you just heard it from other people in your school. He probably doesn’t even know you knew that. But you wouldn’t be surprised if he told you right now that his family was full of successful professionals.
"You went with tech.” You say.
Jungkook chuckles. “I did. But I made a bargain and said I would only take it if he lets me play basketball. He did let me, but he only tolerates it because I’m passing my classes."
You nodded, relating a bit. you wouldn't say your parents were particularly strict – but they were extremely practical people who wanted practical lives for their children. They weren’t over-controlling that they smother you with decisions you could make yourself.
"He really hates it, though.” Jungkook continues.
“Basketball?” You ask.
He nods. “Yeah. He thinks I’m thinking of going professional after I graduate, he doesn’t want me to do it."
"Are you?” You ask, curious. “Going professional, I mean.”
Jungkook shrugs. “I don’t know yet. I love playing. I'd also like to do tech after college, but it feels like I’m just following in his footsteps if I do that," And as if you didn't know already, he humbly adds, "My father’s in tech, by the way.” -- as if his dad was just a regular guy in the field.
He didn’t say it directly, but you feel like he’s probably being pressured by his dad to do this and that. And that makes you feel bad. Jungkook was always so easy-going, so laidback in a way that you would think he was just some varsity casanova asshole with zero care about their future because they think their looks could get them by through their lives, but he really wasn’t anything like that at all. He joined basketball because he loves it, maybe he gets a high from people admiring him for it but you could say he does it mostly for himself. That’s why he trains so hard and plays so hard in court. Aside from that, he was also really smart – which gets overlooked quite often because of his jock persona, and you know that because you were one of those who did overlook his intelligence before because he was a varsity. But he was smart, alright. He takes his studies seriously just as basketball.
Jungkook is admittedly a lot of great things. And it was sad that his family seemed to not support him, the way you see it.
But…
You didn’t really know what to tell him. Is he opening up? It’s just that… you never really talked about these things before and what he’s saying right now is so far from your usual lighthearted and casual conversations and interactions. You drew a conclusion that he probably has a tight relationship with his dad, but you don’t know what to do with that entirely new information.
“Uhm, you’re good at it, basketball,” And his studies, too. You wanted to say but didn’t. You add, “I saw your beater buzzer from the game earlier. It was really cool."
"It’s buzzer beater– hey, how did you know about that?” He says with an amused smile. You feel slightly embarrassed at how you mixed up the term but it was kind of complicated, alright! And you were kind of nervous. You find it comforting that he doesn’t tease you about it, though.
“Oh, well. Nayeon texted me about it. Also, you’re like, trending on Twitter.” You just told what Nayeon said. You actually didn’t know if he was trending because you didn’t have an account in the first place. “But don’t go look there, though, you’ll have a migraine."
Jungkook chuckles and leans back on the couch, relaxed in that position. "Yeah. People on the net can be real assholes."
That comment makes you frown. That probably meant he saw the negative feedback, right? Was he used to it? That would be… upsetting if he was. You knew about the local popularity of the athletes in your school, especially the football and volleyball and basketball players. Jungkook is obviously included in that circle but you feel bad that he has to deal with unnecessary hate. Jobs really are needed for chronically online people, you think bitterly.
Before you could say anything, Jungkook’s phone rang and you didn’t mean to look at his screen but you saw "Dad”. He declined the call.
“He’s talking my ear off about the game earlier,” Jungkook shakes his head. “He acts real concerned over my loss for someone who’s very unsupportive of my basketball career.” He was grinning while he said it but you could hear the annoyance in his tone, how he shut down his phone to probably dodge future calls from his father.
You turned to the movie in front of you.
“Hey, I’m sorry I wasn’t able to go.” You said, effectively changing the subject.
“Hm?” You meet Jungkook’s gaze. He smiles a little. “Ah, I read your text earlier, it’s fine."
You nodded and tried to focus on the movie again, but you haven’t been following the plot and so you had no idea what they’re showing you now.
Jungkook suddenly speaks.
"So are you planning to teach once you graduate? Or take law? You mentioned it before."
Oh. Is he…?
You could feel his genuine curiosity in that question. But you find yourself hesitating to engage in any more deep conversation with him. It’s not that you didn’t want to share… you’re just not that kind of person. Is he expecting you to lay out your personal drama?
You choose not to.
"Not sure. I don't want to talk about it."
You didn't mean for it to come out the way it did; clipped and annoyed. As if you didn't want to talk to him. And you could see that he was taken aback, surprised at the sudden change of your tone. But why? You didn’t feel like sharing. And anyway, you were only fuck buddies, right? Are you suddenly becoming bestfriends who tell each other about everything?
You awkwardly shifted in your seat, eyes trained on the screen in front of you but you felt Jungkook’s stare even while you weren’t looking at him, his eyes boring holes in your side profile.
You decided to not think too much about the awkward silence throughout the next few minutes, but Jungkook suddenly stood up, looking at his phone.
“I... should get going,” Jungkook announces.
And you didn’t expect to feel so bummed about it. But somehow, you were relieved. There was suddenly a certain strange energy around and you didn’t know if you could take any more of it.
“Ah, yeah, it’s kind of late…” you trail off.
Jungkook smiles at you but it doesn’t reach his eyes. You delude yourself into thinking it was not fake. He’s never faked a smile with you before.
“Thanks for the food and for inviting me over.”
“No biggies.” You say as you follow him towards the door.
It’s silent again when he wears his shoes, and once he was set and ready to go, you could feel that your smile was hesitant as he bid his goodbye.
“See you around."
He didn’t offer anything more – he would usually tease you as he goes out, just to rile you up before you part ways. Jungkook just gave a final wave and went on his way.
You had a hard time sleeping that night.
It wasn’t hard to avoid Jungkook all week when he himself seemed to be outdoing you in it.
For the record, you weren’t actually avoiding him for all sense of the word. You needed your space to collect your thoughts from that night and were trying to recover from the awkwardness of the situation because Jungkook and you might not be the best of friends but you’ve never been awkward with each other like that before.
But maybe you should be a little relieved that he hasn’t been texting, or that you haven’t heard from him. Because you weren’t sure if you were able to manage getting out of your shell so soon.
It didn’t mean that it didn’t sting a bit when he didn’t even spare you a glance the other day as you passed each other in the hallways and perhaps you should be celebrating, because yey, he finally did not acknowledge you in some way like meet your gaze and give you a small smile with so many people around that might notice and make a big deal out of it?
But you wore the black skirt he liked so much! He was supposed to text you something stupid like "nice skirt :) i wanna see it pooled around my lap” by the end of the day but no! No such thing happened.
Was he mad at you, is that it? Why would he be mad though? Did he seem mad that night? Did you do something that guaranteed this... Whatever this is? As far as you knew, you did not say anything that warranted a silent treatment from him. Did you? Wait, is he actually giving you the silent treatment?
Ugh.
When Thursday came, you found yourself watching their fourth game on TV together with Nayeon. You got a slight whiplash because it felt like your first time seeing Jungkook’s face in a long while. Somehow, he looked even better on TV, and he was so serious whenever the camera caught him. You supposed he ought to be, but you’ve never seen him that serious before. He would smile whenever they scored, and maybe it was a little embarrassing for your heart to do a little jump when you saw that toothy grin again, after so long.
You were slow to understand shit about the game, but you got the whole gist of it eventually.
Unfortunately, though, the tight game resulted to your university losing in the end.
You wanted so badly to text him something, anything, but you felt like you weren’t on texting terms, so you went to your Instagram and sent Jungkook a direct message.
[11:58pm] ynblips: Hi! I watched the game on TV and it was really tight and you did so well :)
You were mostly not expecting a reply, so you were only a little disappointed when you indeed didn’t get one even after a day passed. But he liked it, only liked it. Which kind of pissed you off.
What was his deal? You’ve gathered that you, apparently, weren’t on speaking terms, for some reason. But this was ridiculous. If he had a problem with you, he should be upfront about it. Not make you guess with this stupid giving-you-the-cold-shoulder thing when you didn’t even deserve it. For god’s sake, you knew that last meeting was awkward but you both usually do a good job of swerving those situations and moving on and acting casual! You’ve been casual for four months! This relationship was supposed to be easy. Smooth-sailing. So what changed now?
Nayeon noticed your crankiness earlier this day, and it concerned you, how much this whole thing was affecting you.
But you’ve grown tired of not knowing anything. You were tired of guessing why Jungkook was being like this.
So you were a woman with a mission today. You planned to talk to Jungkook so he could finally be a big boy and talk to you about his obvious problems with you. Because it had to be that, right? He wouldn’t talk to you because he had issues with you.
Later that day, your quest was made easy when you saw him at the library.
You’re only a little surprised with yourself when you walk towards his direction with the presence of many people around. Yeah, whatever.
“Hey,” you called.
You could see Jungkook’s eyes widening a little as he turns around to see you, his hand stopping from taking notes on his iPad as he looks up at you.
“Oh, hey,” he greets you, but you can see he is a little confused as he takes out his airpods. You never talked to him on school grounds whenever people were around. He neither did, though. It was a mutual agreement.
“We need to talk."
Jungkook looks in between you and the book and notes he was doing, and you would understand if he tells you to fuck off because he was busy – maybe not with those exact words because you’d probably take it to heart and cry about it, but he’s taken you by surprise when he says,
"Okay. Let me just fix this.” Jungkook closes his book and his iPad, stuffing them in his bag.
You anxiously tap your shoe on the floor, though not with sound, aware of the people looking at your interaction with the school’s basketball star player.
“Where to?” He asks as he slings his bag over his shoulder.
“Just, uh, follow me."
He surprisingly does without further questions, and you begin to second-guess yourself about being kind of mad at him for seemingly being mad at you. Maybe you were reading too much into these past few days? Maybe he really wasn’t mad at you and you just assumed so because he suddenly stopped texting you? It’s not that you needed an explanation for why he wasn’t talking to you suddenly. He had a life outside having a friends with benefits situation with you and you know that.
Jungkook stopped when you halted your steps at the far end of the library. It was the old theology section and no one really comes around here anymore so it was quiet and free of lingering, poorly hidden stares from other strangers, who you prefer to not be included in this conversation you are about to have.
Shit, should you have just texted him and told him to come over so you could talk more in private? But you doubted he would reply, and anyway, Nayeon would be home so you had no private space to do that.
"Okay,” you start. “Let’s talk."
Jungkook quirks a brow, leaning back on a cabinet.
You look at him one more time and sigh.
"You’ve been avoiding me.” You didn’t really mean to say it in such a heavy tone, but it came out that way and you couldn’t take it back.
Jungkook is caught off guard.
“Huh?"
You frown. "You’re avoiding me. And I don’t know why and I couldn't care less, usually, but I'm confused and I don’t want to guess anything with you so just say it now."
There, you’ve blurted it all out.
Jungkook took a long time, but you feel yourself getting angry when he only says, "I’m not upset with you."
Really? Really?! Is he really planning to to do this right now? What’s next, is he going to call you crazy for thinking that he was mad at you because he suddenly stopped talking to you altogether? Un-fucking-believable.
"I know you are, just say it.” You say, trying to balance your emotions. He really is gonna call you crazy if you lash out.
“I’m just busy with practice.” but the way he said it so dismissively, like he wanted to be anywhere but here right now, makes you frown even harder.
“You can’t even text me?” You called out. You didn’t know why you said that, because you did just tell yourself it wasn’t a big deal if he didn’t text you. But it doesn’t mean that it didn’t hurt when he confirmed it.
“I don’t owe you an explanation."
You bite back your tongue. Wow, is he going for asshole today? But it hurt, because it was true. He didn’t need to give you an explanation. You weren’t anything important, and nor was he in your life, in any way, so why are you genuinely hurt by this?
When Jungkook noticed your silence, a flash of conflict in his expression, he decided to add, "Look…” he trailed off, as if not really having any idea what to say next. When he gave you that placating look, you knew he was about to say something that will completely piss you off.
“Is it about the sex? I’m sorry we haven’t been able to do that the past few days. Do you want to have sex today?”
You felt anger boiling in your chest as soon as he said that.
He really is going for asshole today.
What in the actual fuck? He thinks you’re confronting him because you haven’t been having sex? Why would he say that like you were just some desperate whore frothing in the mouth to bed him? Does he think of you so low like that? Did he not consider that maybe you were just genuinely concerned of feeling so distant to him right now?
You swallow the lump in your throat and scowl at him.
“You know what, fuck you. I asked you nicely what’s your problem with me.”
Jungkook was visibly surprised with your outburst, and you were disappointed in yourself to even show an ounce of reaction to that bullshit he just said.
But he just looks away, eager to avoid the look on your face. “You didn’t ask that, you went ahead and accused me of avoiding you when you’ve been doing the same thing."
"Oh, so you are admitting to avoiding me. What’s the issue? Say it.” You demanded. But Jungkook wasn’t having any of it.
“I don’t have a problem. What’s your problem? Why are you acting so upset about all of this?"
To even throw that on your face was cruel, and you think you saw a flash of hesitation on his face when he said that, but it was blank after a split second. It’s blank until now, like he doesn’t really give a shit.
Great.
"I just want you to talk to me if you’re upset with me about something.” You say, even though that wasn’t really what you intended to say. It felt like defeat.
You feel pathetic all of a sudden, remembering his words. Why are you so upset about all of this? Because clearly, you care. And apparently, he did not. He didn’t have to put that to words. He didn’t have the right to hurt you like this.
“Talk?” Jungkook repeats. “The last time we did that, you didn't seem to want to."
His words have a bite to them, like he means more than that. And that night flashes in your head. When he was opening up to you, and you chose to disengage by being cagey and avoiding it all together because you felt weird about it.
When you don’t answer, Jungkook sighs.
"I have practice in five minutes. I’ll see you around."
He doesn’t even say goodbye or spare you a last glance when he walks away.
You are a turtle.
Obviously, not literally. But turtles, when bombarded, reflexively duck their heads inside their shells to protect themselves before any damage could be done to them. And the same could be said about you.
You avoid problems like a champ. It’s the only sport that you’re really great at.
Growing up, you’ve never really had a lot of friends. You had a small circle in high school but you didn’t see a significant value in your connection. Maybe because you grew up in an environment where love was non-existent and the relationships in your house were transactional at best, still are. Until now, you have no idea if your parents loved each other at one point or if they were always like that; like two different strangers working jobs during the day that just happen to have the same house to go to at night so you and Jini have some people to call "mom” and “dad”. You guessed you’ll never know, but it was hard not to think that their relationship has always been the latter. Your relationship with your sister mirrors that of your parents’, though, so you can’t really criticize them for not acting like partners enough.
When you were young, you hated the way you approached friendship or any sort of relationships a lot. You hated how it was so easy for others to befriend one another, how it was easy for girls your age to have a life outside of studying. You hated how easy it was for other people to not build these sturdy walls whenever someone approached them. But you just kind of grew into it along the way…
Social networking is important for college, though, and you were forced to have friends but you did make friends willingly along the way. It was not that you are a total sociopath, nor do you think you are one. Nayeon was a sweetheart who was very likeable and you’ve had the pleasure of being roommates with her for two years now. You are close to a certain point, but it wasn’t like you were best friends. She was two years older than you and was on her last year of college and had her own close circle of friends. The closeness was a result of living a domesticated life with each other because you lived in the same house. But you genuinely like her.
And you’ve actually met more people you genuinely liked when you went to college, not just her. Like Taehyung. He was a fun conversationalist, and you feel like you could totally hit it off only if you weren’t too hesitant to befriend him. Juyeon is probably the most hardworking woman you’ve ever met, and most of your liking towards her has a lot to do with the respect and admiration you have for her. And then there was Namjoon. A guy two years your senior during your sophomore year who you've had a short fling with. He was a great guy whom you actually saw yourself dating, but it was a bit complicated. And then Jungkook…
Well… he was everything you imagined him not to be.
You still remember the first time you saw him during orientation day. He wore this huge white sweatshirt and light-washed cargo pants with some stomper boots, hair curly and so fluffy as he slung his bag over his shoulder, talking animatedly with a friend. You’ve had crushes in high school (like that one senior guy from the debate team who turned out to be an asshole so you got over it pretty quickly) but it was the first time you’ve ever felt so strongly like that. Your crush faded eventually though when you learned he was a jock.
However, the universe made different plans. You both had the same code for your first term Philo class and got partnered on a project, and unexpectedly, he turned out to be smart, kind, witty, so unbelievably handsome and attractive and actually wasn’t an asshole like you thought he was when you found out he played in the varsity team. That was the start of your pathetic minor pining over the guy and then four months ago happened.
You hit it off at a random party Nayeon told you to come with her to. Had enjoyable sex. And then another. Until you both talked about the agreement – the stupid agreement that you have now still.
You like him a lot. Always have. In more ways than one.
You were an expert at hiding your feelings so it never really got in the way. And anyway, you aren’t ready for a relationship so the arrangement has always been perfect for you.
But you hated that. Because, really? This part of your life feels like some pages taken out of a shitty young adult fiction book. Falling for the popular jock at school at the same time your fuck buddy. It wasn’t supposed to be like that. You weren’t supposed to like him more than you already have because you were both clear at what you wanted when you started it. But it happened and all those fun times with him at the abandoned lot and the soft kisses and gentle smiles and fond gazes and funny conversations and his stupid teasing are most likely going down the drain because you hurt him with your inability to face your feelings.
You aren’t stupid. You know Jungkook likes you too. You know the past few weeks have been dangerously teetering outside the line of being fuck buddies but you went along with it because who wouldn’t? What were you to do, anyway? Confront it? You’ve never been confrontational.
So when Jungkook tried to get to know more than your outer surface by opening up to you about things that probably no one other than you knew, you cowered.
You cowered because you were afraid of what that would entail.
You’ve never done it, opening up to people. You’ve never known anyone to a point like that. You just weren’t the type to get too close to others, them letting them you in their lives just as you let them in yours. That wasn’t who you were and you’ve always been contented with that for most of your life.
But it wasn’t fair to Jungkook and it wasn’t fair to you. It wasn’t fair to Jungkook because he deserved to know that you care. He deserves to know that you want to know him, too. You want to be close to him more than just the physical, sexual aspect of your relationship. You want to know his intentions behind the overly kind, almost special way he treats you, his caring words, the meaning behind his soft kisses after sex, the purpose behind those kisses that didn’t lead to sex.
And lastly, you want him to know that you were sorry for the other night.
So when another Friday rolled, you finally mustered up the courage to go to his game. It was the last one, after all. You wanted to show up.
The venue was crowded and chaotic and you wanted to ditch but you decided it was fine. You were gonna endure it if it meant you finally got to see Jungkook physically in court.
And saw him, you did. Even though you were in the middle row seats and wearing a cap because you oddly felt unwelcomed and didn’t want to be seen by him – as if he would even want to see you. But it was whatever.
Jungkook was… amazing. That was really the only adjective you could use to describe how he was. Maybe you were a little biased but he was the greatest out of all the ten people running around the court. He just stood out, even when someone else did the good job of scoring.
And people around you seemed to think so too because whenever he did get to score or was the one holding the ball or his face got shown on the huge screen, everyone just lost it.
The match was tight again so it bled into five games. Your Uni just needed to win the last one and they would successfully bring the trophy home.
You found yourself silently cheering for your team, specifically Jungkook, though it felt strange to you because this was your first sports game, after all. But it felt good to do it. It also felt good to see other people so passionate at cheering him on as well as his team, especially after you read all that hate against him on the internet the other week.
And it felt especially great when they did win in the end of it all.
The stands went wild as the game finished with your Uni scoring a solid 105 and 96 for the other.
You’ve stayed long to see Jungkook being awarded the MVP title, but not long enough to find it difficult to get an Uber as you went home.
Nayeon got to your place later than you, but you learned that she wasn’t at the game earlier but was in a study group instead.
You ordered dinner for the both of you, just some Chinese that you quickly finished up.
By 11 pm, you were panicking.
You had a solid plan yesterday. You were supposed to go to Jungkook and apologize to him and whatever but how the hell were you going to do that when you had no idea where he was now? Ugh. You should’ve approached him after the games earlier! But you didn’t feel comfortable doing that with so many people around…
You saw your phone on your night stand and got an idea to just text him. But you didn’t know if he was going to respond. If he was going to tell you to fuck off, you at least didn’t want to receive that through text.
So you opted for the last and craziest option you’ve got.
[11:08pm] You: Hello, Taehyung! I know we haven’t talked in a while and I’m sorry for texting you now, I just have some questions if you don’t mind :) Congrats on winning Finals by the way, it was a great game.
You anxiously wait for his reply that you received not even a minute after you sent your text.
[11:08pm] K. Taehyung: hi __ HAHAHHA im a bit surprised to see your name on my phone!! we’ve never gotten around having that coffee 😅 but thank you for the congrats! hit me with those questions i don’t mind
[11:09pm] You: It’s a real bummer that we’ve both been so busy ):
[11:10pm] You: But I was wondering if you know where Jungkook is? Last week he lent me a jacket when he saw me pour a drink on myself at some cafe, haha. So I was thinking I should give it to him now but I have no idea how to
Listen, it wasn’t the whole truth, but it wasn’t a complete lie either. You indeed needed to find Jungkook, and he lent you a jacket weeks ago which you needed to return but you forgot about it and conveniently remembered it just earlier when you were trying to conjure up an excuse to see him.
[11:10pm] K. Taehyung: oh i was actually just talking to him awhile ago. he wouldn’t go to the after-game party. said he was gonna stay up all night to play overwatch or something
[11:10pm] K. Taehyung: I can text you his address if you want to come over like right now
You feel like you aren’t supposed to just give your friends’ addresses away like that but it is flattering to think that Taehyung must trust you enough to not assume you were a psychopath serial killer or something.
[11:11pm] You: Yes, please. Thank you so much, Taehyung. Catch up on that coffee hang another time
You got an Uber to drive to his place. You tried not to think too much about the fancy complex and how there were elevators instead of just stairs like yours but you managed to get to Jungkook’s place through Taehyung’s text.
You pressed a button upside the knob. It created a loud buzz and you tighten your fingers around the ribbon handles of the paper bag that got his jacket inside.
It was the perfect excuse. You did need to return it to him. And if you got too flustered or scared to talk to him further, you were just going to leave right after he takes it from you and just accept the fact that he probably really hates you now because you were mean and—
The door opens, revealing Jungkook. A shirtless, wet Jungkook.
“Oh."
Jungkook has a hint of shock in his eyes when he comes face to face with you. You’ve never been here, for the record. And he was probably wondering how the hell you got his address.
"Uh,” you start. You thrust the paper bag towards him. “Here. It’s your jacket from weeks ago. I washed it already. Thanks for lending me it.”
You see his hesitation when he takes it from you, and it makes your nerves go haywire.
Jungkook mumbled a little thanks. He stood there for a moment, probably still not getting the shock out of his system. As each second passed, you felt the need and the urge to go, but his voice cut that idea in your head.
“Uh. Do you wanna come in?"
"Yes.” Maybe it was too much of an immediate answer, but you needed to. If you were to stand outside much longer, your courage will wear down and you might miss an opportunity to talk to him.
Jungkook stepped aside and further invited you in. Your steps were a little shy as you followed him inside, watching as he took a pair of Nike sliders and offered it to you as you removed your birkens off your feet.
“Thank you.” You tell him, sliding your feet on the slippers that were definitely too big for you.
He gave you a small smile in return. That gave you a bit of hope that it would go well tonight.
“I’m just gonna go and change into something. You can sit here,” You followed behind him into the living room of his rather huge flat. Really, this was more of a condo unit than an apartment. “There's– sorry. I wasn't– it’s kind of messy here right now but I was busy the past few days. It’s not usually like this here."
Jungkook hastily arranged the scattered throw pillows on the couch. You even hear him hissed as he picked up a bowl and some take-out trash on the coffee table. He reached for something in the tight corner of the couch, holding up a remote awkwardly for you.
He quickly looked away from you though, turning to his huge TV (it was literally a jumbotron) and making it light up. It showed some kind of game on pause.
"I’m sorry, I was playing something earlier. Uh, do you want to play anything? I have a lot of games.” He continued to say.
And you realized Jungkook was panicking. He was rambling, talking words over his own words, jumping from one thing to another and hastily cleaning up the space in the living room.
It was… adorable. The way he was kind of scrambling… to accommodate you? Eh. But it was nice. Nice to know that you aren’t the only one panicking.
“Thanks for the offer, but I don’t really play anything.” You say honestly. You don’t like gaming. It’s stressful.
“Oh…” Jungkook trails off then his eyes set on the kitchen. “Oh shit wait, do you want water? Tea? I don’t think I have tea but I think I can look for something?"
You couldn’t help the laugh that came out from your mouth but you quickly cut yourself off.
"Sorry. Uhm. No. I don’t want anything.” Truthfully, you wanted water but Jungkook needed to change into something immediately. You may not exactly be talking talking right now but his body and tattoos were nice to look at and you didn’t want it to distract you too much. It felt wrong to admire him like that when you were not exactly in great terms.
“You sure?” When you nodded, Jungkook did the same too, but more like to himself. “Okay. I’ll just get to my room."
You sat on his nice leather couch and looked around as Jungkook changed.
It was such a nice place. You could see that it was indeed expensive. The space was definitely, like, three times larger than your own and it even seemed to have another room on the far end. You didn’t know if Jungkook lived alone, he never mentioned anything about it.
You still didn’t find yourself completely relaxed as Jungkook emerged from his room.
The fringe of his bangs are still wet from his shower, but he’s now changed into a grey hoodie with matching shorts.
"Hey,” he said as he walked towards you and sat on the couch. The distance was far but not totally that you end up being on the opposite sides.
“Hi,” you greeted him back. “You have a nice place."
He smiles. "Thank you."
The atmosphere was incredibly awkward, you could feel that. But you pushed yourself to go through it.
"Congrats on the game earlier.” You tell him sincerely.
“Ah… thanks."
"I went there."
"Really?” You could see the understandable surprise in his face after hearing your words. “I didn’t see you."
You chuckle lightly. "Hm. You were too serious and busy in the court to see me.”
Jungkook shyly looks away.
“I– well. You should have told me. I could’ve gotten you a nice seat. Did you get a nice seat?” The sentiment was cute but surprising at the same time. After that time in the library, you wouldn’t have expected him to get you a nice seat.
“It was okay."
It didn’t look like he would say anything more, but you were a little relieved to have a break from the atmosphere when the door buzzed again, indicating someone coming.
You feel your heart jump.
You didn’t know why your mind went to such dark places like him having someone over to do– what? Ugh. Jungkook wouldn’t do that, would he? Honesty was what you agreed on when you started this agreement. You promised to tell each other right away if you start sleeping with other people because of health reasons.
"That must be the pizza.” Jungkook murmurs as he stands up.
You almost sigh in relief.
Okay. So no other women coming over.
Jungkook comes back a moment later with three boxes.
“I thought we could eat something,” he said as he sat on the couch again, this time a little closer than earlier. He looked at the TV, still on that game he was playing. He placed the pizza on the table and took the remote to exit out of his game, pressing some buttons on it and eventually the screen loaded to Netflix. “You wanna watch something?"
That would be nice, actually.
"Yep."
"Okay… uh. Legally Blonde?"
You couldn’t help your eyebrow from raising.
Jungkook laughs a little. You’re a little surprised to hear it. It felt like eons ago since you’ve heard it.
"I like it a lot.” He shrugged and then looked it up on Netflix, clicked the movie poster and pressed play.
You start eating the pizza on the couch. You were obsessed with Legally Blonde probably an abnormal amount but this time, its entertainment didn’t affect you full force because at the back of your head, you’re still trying to figure out how to speak up the words you really wanted to say to Jungkook.
“Hey…” you suddenly speak. You hesitate for a while but then let out a heavy breath. Jungkook looks at you because of that. “I’m sorry."
His confusion was anticipated. He face looks like he was ready to ask, but you continue,
"About the other night. Uh. When you went over. I’m sorry. I made you feel like I didn’t care but…” you train your gaze to the remote on the corner of the couch. “But I do, Jungkook. I care about you. It’s just that, it freaked me out, you know? People never felt comfortable enough with me to share such personal things and I’ve always been okay with that because I’m not exactly—” you cut yourself off, trying to organize your thoughts. But you give up because there was no use in doing such. You wanted to be honest as much as possible. “I know I don’t exactly strike people as someone who can care. And, well, that’s true, you know? People always tell me that I almost function like a robot. So, uh, I freaked out, because I thought you trusted me enough to do that and I felt like I didn’t deserve it, your trust I mean. And so I acted like that because I didn’t know what—”
“Hey,” Jungkook stopped you before you could go on a full spiral. You didn’t notice because of your rambling earlier but he was closer this time. “Breathe. It’s fine. I have all the time to listen to you."
It was such a sweet sentiment, paired with his charming smile. You feel your heart jump and look away from his gaze.
"Baby,"
There. He’s calling you that name again. Has he forgiven you? Were you both on that terms again? But he couldn’t have forgiven you that fast!
"Baby, look at me,” you did, because he held your face in his warm hands, making you look at him. You could feel your cheeks tingle in his hold. “I’m actually so glad you came here tonight. I appreciate your apology, and I accept it.” He says, voice sounding so sincere.
You looked down, feeling like you don’t deserve it at all.
“I’ve been thinking, you know?” Jungkook lifts your chin up with his fingers, smiling, such mirth behind it that you think he was probably thinking you were going to tease him about his words. But you didn’t feel like joking with him right now. “I totally didn’t think things through that night. I shouldn’t have told you all about my personal drama—"
Oh, no. That’s exactly what you thought you made him feel that night, and for him to verbalize it, it hurts you. Because you knew you truly made him feel that way. It wasn’t your intention but you knew your reaction –or lack thereof– threw him off.
"No, no. I should have—"
"No, ___, I shouldn’t have dumped all of that onto you expecting you to have a say about it and be disappointed and extremely hurt when you didn’t. We don’t know each other a lot, I know that." He gives you a sheepish smile. "I guess I just... I wanted us to know each other a little better you know? But I must’ve freaked you out instead and made you uncomfortable with me telling you all about those when we made it clear that this relationship was never going to be like that, and I’m sorry. I’m sorry for dumping. I kind of… realized that... maybe you just wanted some lazy time with me that night. So I’m sorry. I believe you're also apologetic about it, but I’m saying don’t be. It was all on me."
Jungkook’s words were a jumbled mess in your head that you were surprised to even get them.
"I–no, no. Kook– I… told you, I care about you. I—” you felt a metaphorical block in your head, and it made you cut yourself off. But then you remember his words and so you continue, “I didn’t just– look. It was unexpected, and I told you I just freaked out because I didn’t know where we stood and I just felt like I wasn’t deserving to know you like that. But I care a lot about you.”
Jungkook was quiet for a while, and you feared he was contemplating and thinking you were just lying to get over everything with. But then his face softens at your words. “I care a lot about you, too,” He says, and then it contorts a little, as if he remembered something. “That’s why I’m also… I’m also sorry about that time at the library. I was a complete asshole to you. I wanted to be mean because I was hurt but none of it was your fault. I really am sorry."
Your head takes you back to that time in the library. He did hurt you with the harsh words he’d spoken, but his apology sounded sincere and you believe it.
"Yeah. Uhm. I’m sorry about cornering you there. I should’ve texted you that I wanted to talk but I wasn’t sure if you were going to reply."
Jungkook looked a little shameful for reasons that you couldn’t think of.
"I’m sorry about that. I acted like such a boy about the whole thing. You don’t deserve to be ghosted suddenly because you hurt my feelings without you even really knowing why. I should’ve talked to you properly."
You bite your lip, feeling like you were suddenly going to cry.
You know it was the bare minimum, and even though he said you had nothing to be sorry about, you still feel oddly emotional about someone apologizing to you. You’d never been apologized to sincerely even when a lot of people have done you wrong and hurt you before. They always thought you didn’t care or just got over things quickly because apparently, people had the impression that you weren’t the type to feel anything.
"I like you a lot.” You blurt out.
It was stupid. It was so stupid to say that in the middle of this conversation, but your mouth was running faster than your brain and you couldn’t help it.
“Really?” Jungkook grins, and it was quite big. Your heart beats faster in your chest. “I really like you, too. Like, a lot. Probably more than you do.”
You meet his eyes finally. They hold such fondness for you, and you’ve always noticed. But you brush it away just as it shows. Regular, old, __. Always pushing away people who like her.
Right now, you’re berating yourself for pointedly ignoring that before, but his dark eyes serve as a distraction. They were so ominous and so big and looked like they had the stars in them. And he was so handsome. Suddenly, your gaze falls to his lips and quickly trains to the mole under the bottom one. You’ve always wanted to kiss it but never did so because… because, well. It would be weird, right? But then you remember that Jungkook always kisses that mole in between your chest...
You blush at the thought and look away.
“That’s nice.” You said, not really knowing how to respond.
Jungkook chuckled and twisted himself to look forward again, at the TV playing Legally Blonde.
It was like that for a while and you found that the weight you’ve been carrying all week on your back felt like it’s been lifted, finally.
This night was going really, really well.
And so well it went.
Legally Blonde ended and you and Jungkook somehow ended up being closer. So close that his arm just found its way around your shoulders, your leg across his, his other arm wrapped around that leg to pull you impossibly closer to him onto the next film.
It’s been half an hour into the new movie but if you were honest, your brain wasn’t really on it. It was on how Jungkook held you delicately, his mouth pressing kisses on the crown of your head occasionally, almost absentmindedly. Your thoughts were filled with the soft, gentle caresses of his hand on your leg, and how you would feel his eyes even when you weren’t looking. It was all so tender and just so, so incredibly nice.
When you yawned, Jungkook immediately checked on you with a light chuckle.
“Sleepy?” He asks.
You shake your head but another yawn forced its way out of your mouth again. You let your head fall dramatically on his chest as he laughed.
“I gotta go…” you said, thinking that it’s probably late as hell and dark outside. But you found that you really didn’t want to. The material of his hoodie was so soft and his presence was so calming and it sounded undeniably cheesy but you wanted to be held by him a little more.
“You could stay."
That made you look up at him.
"Huh?"
"You can stay here, if you want. Sleep over."
"Oh."
A flash of hesitation on his beautiful face.
"Only if you want to, of course. I’ll drive you home if you wanna go.” He offers quickly, as if embarrassed to even suggest the thing he said earlier.
But you did want to stay. But… he never stayed over at your place. You didn’t let him and he never expressed a little bit of desire to do so, anyway. Would it be unfair if he never slept over at yours but you would at his now? What did your conversation today change? When he said “I like you”, did that mean it was okay for you to stay the night?
“Uhm, I’d like to stay here, if it’s okay with you.” You said, throwing your inhibitions away. There was no room for more denials in your heart.
Jungkook’s bright grin made your worries subside. He definitely wants you to stay as much as you do.
“Okay."
"It’s okay for you? Sorry, I don’t have a lot of pillows…” Jungkook rubbed the back of his neck and looked at you sheepishly.
You waved him off. “It’s fine. Hey, come here now."
Jungkook did a poor job of hiding a big grin again as he slid on the bed with you.
When you twisted yourself so your back was facing him, about to reach for your phone on the night stand to see if Nayeon replied to your text telling her you wouldn’t be home until morning, Jungkook also did the same and wrapped his arm around your waist, basically spooning you.
And you realized that oh, he’d mistaken you for wanting to be a little spoon…
But it was cute. And you really like him holding you, so you pretended it was your intention all along and mentally noted to check your phone tomorrow morning.
"You smell good.” He said against your ear. You smiled at the way it tickled a bit.
“I don’t think I do anymore, but thanks.”
You showered right after coming home as the game ended but that was many hours ago, so surely Jungkook must just be speaking nonsense. And anyway, he was the one who smelled nice because he did just get out of the shower. He smelled like that certain apple scent he always did.
“No, really. Like flowers. I always liked that about you."
"Eh, it’s probably just my bath and body works body wash."
"Really?” You felt him sniff up your arm and you giggled. That reaction encouraged him to do it more until his nose reached your armpit. It tickled so much that you thrashed and turned and bit his arm. His laughter got louder as you did so, but you only pouted at him.
“Okay, sorry, sorry,” Jungkook said but he didn’t look like it. You didn’t expect it but he suddenly kissed your forehead. Your eyes reflexively closed at the feel of his lips on your skin.
You open them once again only to see Jungkook staring into your eyes again, quite intensely that you feel like he was there looking right into your soul.
“I missed you.” He whispered, his hand that was around your waist tightening, the other clearing up your face from stray hairs.
“I really missed you too.” you said as sincerely as you could. Because you really did, and you hope he could feel it and believe it just like you did his words.
A few seconds after and then his lips finally touched yours and it was such a relief that you sighed against them. It was a slow kiss. Sweet and too short but you didn’t really mind when Jungkook looked at you again like you hung the stars in the sky.
“Let’s sleep baby, turn around for me again.” He said and you wanted to reprimand him for ordering you around but you didn’t really feel like you needed to. You didn’t really have complaints about being the little spoon in this cuddling session, anyway.
It was only about a minute of silence when Jungkook suddenly spoke.
“Babe, I know I’m probably going to ruin this wholesome moment but can I hold your boob while we try to sleep?"
And you couldn’t help but laugh because who wouldn’t.
"Go for it.” You said, settling against his chest, getting more comfortable. Jungkook was only too happy to let you, letting out a low happy hum as he held you tighter, another hand wandering inside the worn out shirt you were wearing that he lent you for the night.
The contact was cold to the touch at first, but when he gave you a squeeze and finally rested his hand over there, it got warm eventually.
Having a weight on top of your boob while sleeping was definitely a new concept for you, but you found that it was oddly comforting.
There was nothing sexual to it, not really. And you thought Jungkook didn’t really have any sexual intentions to begin with.
It was just nice to have his hand on your breast.
“So soft,” Jungkook whispered at some point and you just chuckled in between putting yourself in slumber.
It’s been hard to settle in bed peacefully the previous nights after that debacle weeks ago, but that moment, you slid to dreamland quite easily; and you were certain it was due to Jungkook’s warm body all over yours.
EPILOGUE
( ONE MONTH LATER )
You have awoken in a feverish feeling brought by the dream of a certain man drawing all kinds of shapes on your clit with his skillful tongue. At first, the sensation felt far away, like it was just a distant memory, but you suddenly feel a seemingly too real grip on your thighs and a tentative swipe over the length of your nether region.
When you blearily open your eyes, the sunlight intruding through the seams of your room, you caught a sight of a very real man’s head in between your legs, his dark hair pulled by a headband as he determinedly pleasures your pussy.
“Jungkook,” you sigh, blindingly reaching for his head.
He hums in your pussy, and it sends a jolt right up your spine. He felt you jumping a little, and that earned a chuckle from him. The vibration of it in your aching heat made your legs quiver.
“Good morning, baby."
It was a little disorienting to wake up to Jungkook eating you out so early in the morning, but the pleasure overrode it as you throw your head back on your soft pillows, twisting your face to the side and burying it on the fluffy material as Jungkook sucks on your clit, his finger teasing over the lips of your pussy.
”Ah, that feels so good…" you moan, thrashing on the bed at the delight brought by his tongue. But Jungkook’s strong hold kept your legs wide for him to have complete access to your wet cunt which he’s licking like it was a meal he’s always wanted to have.
“Wanna make you feel good,” he said, beginning to place open mouthed kisses on your pussy that delivered delirious shivers all over your body. He emphasized his sentiment by bringing two fingers in your hole, sliding them in and out quite easily as you felt yourself gushing every second from his actions. “So wet. You love this, angel? You like what I’m doing?"
All you could give him was a pathetic little whimper that you hope he understood as he didn’t bother to wait for your response and proceeded to wrap his mouth on your clit again, his tongue flicking the sensitive bud with the steady way his fingers slipped in and out of you, lewd squelches filling the otherwise quiet room except for the chirping bird outside.
And it sounded oddly poetic.
So peaceful. Oh, to wake up like this everyday.
Your grasp on his hair tightened, bringing his face closer to your pussy that you even got a hold of his headband, but you didn’t care. All you could think about was how delicious Jungkook is speeding his fingers in your entrance, long and bony digits touching every ridge of your pussy, slowly but surely sending you to your edge. Your breath quickened every second passed, and now you could say you were fully awake.
Jungkook broke away from you and you were just about to reprimand him about it when he suddenly licked a long, slow stripe over the wet length of your entrance and you cried out.
You were nearly brought to tears when he dove in your core again to repeat his actions from earlier, but this time, he went for messy. So sloppy; his head moving around your pussy, sucking your juices with enthusiasm and making your arch your back on the mattress, his finger rubbing your clit to bring you to your orgasm.
And he did successfully bring you to it. He did with what seemed to sound like a painful groan of your name from his throat, a husky sound that made your pussy and legs quiver. But that didn’t stop Jungkook from lapping at the cum that dripped out.
You let out a big breath, making yourself bounce on the bed as you fell to it. Exhausted. Spent.
"Kook,” you nudged Jungkook with your foot to his bicep because he was doing that thing again.
“Wanna clean you up."
You roll your eyes. It was so counterproductive but you let him be for awhile, relaxing on your back as he quite literally slurped the gush that came and is still coming out from you. That was why him "cleaning you up” was useless.
“Let me suck your cock.” You said, nudging him again. Jungkook peeled his head from between your legs and looked at you, and you nearly moaned at finally seeing his face. He looked insanely hot with his hair around his sweaty hearline pulled by that head band, but the sheen gloss all over his mouth to his chin made you feel just a little shy.
“Really?” Jungkook asked again, eyes wide, like he was a kid about to receive his gifts from Santa on Christmas morning.
You only hummed, bringing your body in a sitting position. Jungkook grabbed your waist, about to kiss you, but you pushed him on the bed and slid your leg over his thighs, leaning down to make quick work of pulling his boxers down that had a little wet patch on the front and a huge boner that was just begging to be freed.
Jungkook sighed when you get a hold of his length, not wasting time to tease because as much as you wanted to, you were impatient to taste him and make him cum.
“F-fuck,” Jungkook curses as you pumped his cock, your thumb pressing on his leaking tip. “You’re so pretty, baby."
His groan is elongated as you finally put him in your mouth. You make yourself comfortable by kneeling inside his spread legs, leaning down closer to his crotch and twisting your head to the side so that you could gather your hair in one side. It was always hard to reach deep, but you make do of your hand, twisting your fingers around the remaining length that your mouth could not take.
It didn’t take too long for Jungkook to shake and start speaking sweet nonsense in the wake of his impending orgasm, probably because he had been holding back since he ate you out. But you worked as hard, sucking on his tip, brushing your fingers over his balls here and there, pumping his wet cock in your hand, ignoring the tears that’s forming in the corners of your eyes.
“Baby, I’m cumming,” he warned, holding the back of your head to try and get you off but you insisted and let him release in your mouth.
Jungkook hissed, and you leaned back to jerk his cock for any more cum, swallowing the one in your mouth that you felt had gotten to some parts of your face so you try to lick over your mouth, tasting cum there. He was still cumming, though, just a little, it spurting on your chest and chin.
You giggled as Jungkook groaned. When you were sure you milked him dry, you let yourself flop on his naked body, draping yourself over it even though he was kind of sweaty and sticky… but you don’t really mind. You were just gonna shower later.
“You’re a minx.” He said, chuckling, his arm going around your waist and the other resting over one bare ass cheek.
“I live to make you suffer.” you replied, rubbing your cheek against his chest then pressing kisses to it.
“You’re winning."
That made you laugh.
After a while, you remove your head on his chest and look down on him. He arches a brow, waiting. And then you dropped your mouth to the mole under his bottom lip. You giggled because Jungkook wasn’t expecting it, shown by the confusion on his face. Before he could say anything, you lock your lips with his, sighing when he reciprocated your kiss right away.
The kiss takes a U-turn as Jungkook flipped you over so he was the one hovering over you now, hands roaming around your body sending tingles all over your spine to your toes and heat between your legs as he squeezed your breasts.
He squished the both of them in his huge palms, and you feel his cock twitch against your thigh when he did so, so as the gush of wetness coming from your pussy as he finally dropped his mouth to suck on your pebbled nipples.
”___, are you—oh my god I’m so sorry!“
Jungkook and you quickly looked over your door, catching Nayeon just as she scrambled to close it.
"Shit.” You hissed.
Jungkook looked at you. And then you both get off of each other, him going for the sweats he’d folded on a swivel chair in your room, and you putting on your robe and messily tying your hair in a bun with a hair tie.
“I’m just gonna go outside and talk to her…” you trail off, watching as Jungkook puts his pants on.
“Okay,” he went over to you, holding your face and leaning down to kiss you. “Sorry."
You licked your lips as he broke the kiss, couldn’t help but smile.
"It’s fine."
When you went out, Nayeon is at the kitchen drinking water. When she saw you, you gave her an awkward smile.
She frowned. "I’m really so, so sorry, ___. I swear I didn’t know you had someone over. I just got back from the overnight study group I texted you about last night and it’s 8 am so I thought I could wake you up for class."
You find yourself smiling genuinely at her explanation. You wave her off and went over to grab a drink of water as well.
"It’s fine. Our prof actually emailed us last night that our 8 am class was gonna be cancelled today so technically my first class is gonna be at 10. But I’m also supposed to be getting ready, so…"
Nayeon hummed and drank more of her water.
You were just waiting for it. You knew she was so gonna ask you about it. You were kind of nervous but you found that you actually didn’t care that much to tell her all about Jungkook.
So when she finally did ask, you only looked sheepish.
"So, Jeon Jungkook, huh?"
You nod.
"I should’ve known!” Nayeon exclaimed. “You were suddenly interested about basketball and– no, I’m not gonna lie. I did not expect that."
You bit your lip as you hid half of your face behind the rim of the glass. "Yeah…"
Nayeon suddenly narrowed her eyes at you, and you hold yourself to prepare for what’s next.
"He was your sneaky link all this time?"
Your eyes widened. "No!” But then you quickly remembered that, technically, he was. But… “but not really. I mean, not anymore?"
You weren’t sure, though. Your relationship with Jungkook for the past month had undergone a shift. You were purely fuck buddies before, and now you fuck and see each other for more than that. You sleep over almost twice a week at his place, have movie nights. He let you know about this game Animal Crossing and you’ve been obsessed since so sometimes you really just go over his place to play it. (Your island was seriously becoming pretty.) Also, you started grabbing lunch regularly these days in his car and go on what you can call dates if both your schedule aligned and it’s not that you were actively keeping other people from knowing about this sudden change in your relationship, including Nayeon, it was just — your time together was really just spent for pure enjoyment with each other. It was just like: if people saw, then they do.
Despite that, a label still wasn’t put to it.
You don't mind.
"Oh, so–your boyfriend?!” Nayeon’s tone is laced with surprise, and you flinched at hearing the word boyfriend but you shrugged it off.
“Uhm, it’s very new.” Was what you replied. It was the only thing you could offer, honestly.
Your friend looked at you for a few seconds and then nods, as if understanding – what? you have no idea – and then turned to the direction to your room.
You see Jungkook popping out from your door when you looked over.
“Hi, Nayeon."
When he emerged, he’s fully dressed and it was a bummer that he’d taken out his head band. Whatever, you’d make him wear it later. It was really cute when he wore it.
"Ohh, here comes the sexy man."
The casualty of it threw you off a bit but then you suddenly feel grateful to Nayeon for not making a big deal about the whole thing.
So you laughed and joked, "Don’t say that! You’re going to stroke his ego."
Nayeon’s right eyebrow raised. "Oh, his ego is definitely getting stroked, alright."
Even Jungkook burst out laughing at the crude implications of her words, and you found the whole thing atrocious. Nayeon only shook her head, but she was smiling.
"Sorry for interrupting your time together, lovebirds. I brought something for breakfast but I don’t think it’ll be enough for two people.” She said, pointing towards a take-out bag on the kitchen counter.
“It’s fine, thanks Nayeon."
She waved you off. "I’ll just be in my room. Eat first before you do cardio, guys."
You huff out a laugh at her words again, and so did Jungkook. He walked towards you as Nayeon disappeared in her room, and you smiled at him as he did so.
Jungkook held your waist and pressed you a little to the refrigerator, but you have no complaints in the way he leaned down to share a slow and soft kiss with you.
"Breakfast?” He whispered, kissing your cheek. And then your nose.
You giggled, circling your arms around his neck. He hummed at the contact, like he’s always so content and peaceful whenever you touch him.
“I think I’ll just get coffee on my way to Uni.” you told him.
That made him frown, though. “That’s really not…” you arched your brow as you wait for him to finish his words. He sighed. “Okay. But at least eat some toast? I’ll make it for you."
You nod. "Okay. I’m gonna go shower first, though. I stink."
As if prompted, Jungkook quickly buried his face to the crook of your neck and whiffed out your scent, dramatically smelling you and then peeling his face away, saying, "Nope, still smell like flowers to me. But I agree, we need a shower."
"We?"
He gives you a serious look. "Yes. Water conservation is one of my goals this year."
You jab on his chest lightly. So stupid. But so handsome and cute that you can’t help but pull him close to you and kiss him again.
Suddenly, Jungkook grabbed your thighs and make you hold on to him as he carried you across the living room. You stopped your own squeal before you could scare Nayeon with it. Jungkook laughed at that and you slap his chest in retaliation.
He went straight to the bathroom and put you on the counter with all the intentions to keep making out with you by the way he was swirling his tongue deliciously against yours, hands squeezing your sides.
But you really had to shower.
He whined when you put your hands on his shoulders and broke free from his kiss, pushing him away a little.
"Don’t be a baby. Let’s shower,” you said, giving him a stern look. He looked petulant for a while, but then suddenly smirked. You narrowed your eyes, pretty sure he had dirty things in his head right now. “No funny business. You literally have class in an hour."
"I could make you cum in less than that."
"Jungkook!"
He laughed, kissing you. "I’m kidding.”
“Behave. Nayeon is here."
He only nodded and began taking his clothes off. You also removed your robe from your body, going over to the towel rack to hang it there. Jungkook stopped in his tracks and shamelessly ogled your naked form and you rolled your eyes, not waiting for him as you stepped in the shower first. He followed right after, smiling at you as he offered to wash your body.
Jungkook assured you he had no funny business in mind, but you didn’t really mind when his hands suddenly got grabby, when he told you that his hands could lather your body wash more effectively than your loofah just so he could massage your boobs in his soapy palms, staying a little too long over there. But you didn’t complain when his finger ghosted over your pussy, and you absolutely weren’t mad when he kissed you hotly as the shower ran and water soaked the soap suds out of your body.
In fact, you enjoyed it a lot when he pressed you against the wall while his strong arms held you tight as he fucked you open, gasping in your mouth, grunting about how pretty you were and how much you were such a good girl for him.
He spoke more nonsense in your ear when he turned you around, an arm tight around your breasts, his other hand gripping your waist as he slid his engorged cock in and out of you from behind while you tried to minimize the sound of your cries until you both came.
You know Jungkook knew his goal to conserve water was doomed from the very start, especially when you ended up taking a second shower because you felt sticky and just unclean.
But it felt great to come out of the bathroom and have Jungkook dressed the same time as you with the clothes he left in your closet from the other times he’s spent over here.
"I’ll see you later.” He pressed a quick kiss on your mouth.
“Okay,” he smiled and you failed to resist the urge to kiss him again for the last time. “I’m coming over to play Animal Crossing."
"You only like me for my Nintendo…” Jungkook jokingly narrowed his eyes at you and you laughed.
“It took you a long time to figure out?”
Jungkook pouts. “As long as you curl up in my lap while you play it, I can accept that.”
“You’re cute, baby. But you’re late to class, go scram.” You shooed him and he chuckled.
“Okay, kiss me again?” You did. Jungkook smiled and kissed you but on the forehead this time. “Bye, pretty."
You leaned on the doorframe, arms crossed as you watched him slowly disappear from your pathway with (certainly) a fond look on your face.
Blurring the lines with your fuck buddy might be cliche, and confronting it might have been hard, but you did it. And he was just as willing and honest with you about his feelings.
And it was worth it.
all right reserved © awrkive, 2023. no reposts, modification, and copying allowed. if you enjoy my work and have the extra means, please consider supporting me on ko-fi <3
#fic: cn&bl#jungkook smut#jungkook imagines#jungkook x reader#jungkook scenarios#bts smut#jungkook fluff#bts imagines#jungkook fanfic#jeon jungkook x reader
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🏥 Seventeen Med Series [Masterpost]
… a new series consisting of 13 individual fics brought to you by Kari @brownsugarbaybee and Shu @welcometomyoasis in honour of seventeen's anniversary...
--⌃⌄-💎-⌃⌄– You know without you i’m so lonely, when you’re not here 911 calling, into your heat again i’m diving, darling you, darling you, baby --⌃⌄-💎-⌃⌄–
Synopsis: When the previous director of Seventeen Medical Center retired, his grandson, Lee Jihoon, was promoted as his successor. Jihoon made many changes to the hospital, but the most important change of all? He hired 11 new medical staff members and 1 medical student, all of whom he knew from his days as a medical student. As these new changes occur, you bet chaos (and 13 different romance stories) ensue.
Pairing: seventeen x fem! reader
Genre: medical au, fluff, angst (thanks to shu), hurt/ comfort, smut (only in Kari’s fics, so MDNI with those), others tbd.
Warnings: blood, injury, illness, medical procedures (needles, operations), patient death, others tbd.
Status: ongoing…
Update frequency: whenever we can. Don’t worry though! Each fic can be read as a standalone!!
Disclaimer 1: Please note we are both not in the medical field, we don’t claim to know anything about medicine. Our fics will contain incorrect medical information and are supposed to be taken as works of fiction.
Disclaimer 2: Please note Shu’s account is sfw, and Kari does write nsfw content. Since we are each writing different fics for different members, we will post the fics separately on our respective accounts. For minors, everything on Shu’s account will not contain any nsfw, but MDNI with the fics linked here that contain nsfw content. We will be careful in putting warnings in this masterlist and on fics with nsfw content. We understand this is confusing so please send us an ask or dm if you wish to clarify anything!
Authors’ Note: this series is inspired by our conversations and Shu’s obsession with Doctor Conner Rhodes from Chicago Med. We will be opening a taglist for this series, if you’re not on our permanent taglists and wish to be tagged, please send either one of us an ask if you would like to be added!! Note that minors will only be tagged for sfw fics!!
✧ Without further ado… cueing the opening song!
✧ Introducing our characters!
⚕️Dr. Choi Seungcheol, Trauma Surgeon
⚕️Dr. Yoon Jeonghan, Neurosurgeon
⚕️Dr. Joshua Hong, Pediatric Surgeon
⚕️Dr. Wen Junhui, Radiologist
⚕️Kwon Soonyoung, RN, Emergency Department Nurse in Charge
⚕️Dr. Jeon Wonwoo, Pathology
⚕️Dr. Lee Jihoon, Director of Seventeen Medical Center (Current position), Cardiologist (Previously)
⚕️Dr. Lee Dokyeom, Psychiatrist
⚕️Dr. Kim Mingyu (PhD), Physiotherapist
⚕️Xu Minghao, Head of Patient Services
⚕️Boo Seungkwan, RN, Emergency Department Nurse
⚕️Dr. Vernon Chwe, Orthopedic Surgeon
⚕️Lee Jung Chan (Dino), 4th Year Med Student
✧ Masterlist:
⚕️Prologue (sfw, written by Shu)
⚕️…
--⌃⌄-💎-⌃⌄– ‘Cause I’m your home, home, home, home, a place you can come to, a place you can come to --⌃⌄-💎-⌃⌄–
shu's taglist:
@weird-bookworm @wonijinjin @babyleostuff @wishing-fieshes @kwanienies
@mayashu @megseungmin @porridgesblog @haecien @mirxzii
@scoupsofcherries @eightlightstar @brownsugarbaybee @zaggprincess2 @nonononranghaee
@hrts4hanniehae @treehouse-mouse @vcutparis @heavenfilm @bananabubble
@hyneyedfiz @abibliolife @isabellah29 @starshuas @cheolsposts
@carlesscat-thinklogic23
kari's taglist: @phattyboo90 @welcometomyoasis
svt med taglist (open)
sfw fics: @arrblgs @heyitz00
Taglist age tbc: @belladaises @zahrareadsstuff
all fics: @eightlightstar @iamawkwardandshy @foxinnie8 @shuabby1994 @black-swan-blog27
@xuimhao @junniesoleilkth @justsomekpopstuff @jenowithjaem @armycarat2612
@yuuyeonie @myjaeyunn @yeonjinnie @tangerine-seungkuan @hoshisgalaxy
@miidorei @hamji-hae @suraandsugar @carlesscat-thinklogic23 @yoongznme
@missychief1404 @napipope-ta @haechanshoes @777bae @lightprincess-world
@odetoshua @hayleyfields33 @nkl1a @tnafzi @nonie1ov3r
@blissedjoon @kokoiinuts @hyeissante
#seventeen#seventeen fic#seventeen scenarios#seventeen fanfic#seventeen imagines#seventeen fluff#seventeen x reader#seventeen drabbles#svt fluff#seventeen angst#svt x reader#seungcheol x reader#seungcheol fluff#jeonghan x reader#joshua hong x reader#junhui x reader#hoshi x reader#wonwoo fluff#wonwoo x reader#woozi x reader#dokyeom x reader#mingyu fluff#mingyu x reader#minghao x reader#seungkwan x reader#vernon x reader#dino x reader#svt med
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5 times you took care of the 141st, and one time they took care of you
Happy (late) holidays everyone! I hope you enjoy this piece!
Platonic!141st x medic!reader
Warning: Canon typical violence, minor angst, hurt/comfort, medical inaccuracies, military inaccuracies, very minor gore, hospital type settings, minor illness, fainting, brief mentions of vomiting, cursing.
1st
“Need a medic stat!”
You rushed through the battle ground, attempting to make your way to the other side of it. This was made extremely difficult by the large chunks of rubble scattered about, oh and the fact they are at least a dozen people shooting at you.
“Stitch!!”
“Soap I’m on my way, apply pressure I’ll be there soon!” You panted, vaulting over some rubble and sliding to cover to prevent getting shot yourself.
The mission had gone to shit extremely quickly. You were just supposed to get the information and get out, stick together and move quickly. You all were not anticipating bombs being dropped on your heads from enemy aircrafts.
They had scattered you all quickly, as each of you attempted to avoid being hit. It seemed as that was their plan because as soon as you all were split up enemy soldiers surrounded you out of nowhere.
Price has called for an evac, but the lack of non blown up landmarks made it difficult to regroup.
You fired off a few shots into the smoke, praying they found their mark, and took off once more.
Going over and under rubble, left and right, in and out, it felt like you were never going to reach Soap.
Just as you were about to start violently cursing the gods for the situation you were in you saw Soap a few hundred yards off from you. To your surprise he looked to be in alright shape, the lump next to him however you couldn’t say the same for.
“Soap I have visual on you, what’s the situation?”
“The situation is Gaz is bloody shot!!”
Cursing under your breath you moved from your cover once more. Keeping low to the ground, more crawling than running at times, you finally made your way to Soap and Gaz.
Sliding in next to them you got to work. Looking Gaz over, you immediately started treating the biggest and most obvious problem, the bullet wound in his stomach.
Soap had tried his best to stop the bleeding, that much was clear from the soaked gauze packed into the wound, but with the need to return fire he couldn’t keep up with it.
You applied heavy pressure on it, praying that’s enough to keep him alive until he can get to a hospital.
“Price where the hell is that damn evac?!”
“3 minutes out, landing in what used to be the hospital parking lot. I’ve got Ghost with me what’s your status?”
“Me and Soap are alright, Gaz has been shot and is loosing blood fast he needs to get out of here asap!”
“We need to move!” Soap yells at you over his shoulder from where he’s returning fire at the enemy.
You act fast, harshly rubbing Gaz’s sternum to wake him up.
His eyes barely peak open, “Stitchy? What’s goin’ on?” He sounds drunk, which with how much blood he’s lost doesn’t surprise you.
“Hey, hey buddy, stay awake, your badly hurt we need to move.” You chirp, trying to keep your voice light despite the situation. “How you feelin’ bud? Can you talk to me?”
As you speak you rummage through your pocket, sighing in relief when you find what you were looking for, a stim shot and some pain relief.
Gaz had nodded off again in the brief time you weren’t speaking, and you lean in again to speak to him. “Gaz!! Come one buddy, keep your damn eyes open!”
“Stitch!” Soap calls from behind your back, the urgency in his voice can not be ignored.
“I know!” Deciding that you don’t have time to wake him up, you quickly stab the stim shot into his thigh.
That wakes up Gaz with a start. He flinches in pain, his eyes now wide open.
“Welcome back to the world buddy!” You shout at him, quickly injecting him with pain relief and tightening the sloppy bandage around his midsection one last time.
“Soap! Ready to move!” You call to him, hauling Gaz’s arm and part of his body, over your shoulder.
Soap leads the way, ducking behind rubble and returning fire when he can. You both move as quickly as you can, you would be lying if you said you weren’t struggling to keep up. Gaz was already fairly heavy, he also has all his gear on him which did not help your situation at all.
You were falling a bit behind Soap, but you kept hauling both you and Gaz towards him as fast as you could.
You were not going to let either of you die out here.
Finally you both reach the evac sight. Laying eyes on Price and Ghost you feel like you can breath again.
You run up next to where they’re positioned behind a large chunk of rubble. Laying Gaz down with his back to it you go to check his bandages again.
When you glance up to his face you notice that he’s awake. “How ya feelin’ bud?” You shout over the sound of gunfire, applying more pressure to his bleeding wound.
“Like shit.” He quips back.
You struggled to hear him over the sound of gunfire, but you were glad that he was conscious enough to talk to you and process what your saying.
Finally, fucking finally, your hear the sound of what might as well be the holy grail.
The heli lands about 20 yards away from you, cruising down to the ground, before it’s even landed Price is yelling orders.
“Stitch and Gaz move first, the rest of us will cover you from behind!”
You throw Gaz’s arm back over your shoulder and haul him onto his feet, thankfully he’s now awake enough that he can help you instead of you dragging him. Once you reach the heli you throw the top half of his body in, causing him to wince in pain.
“Sorry bud!” You shout over the noise of the chopper, pulling him the rest of the way in. You lean over him, securing him inside the chopper, then lifting up his shirt to check and make sure his bandages are still tight. Thankfully the bleeding has slowed down enough where there is minimal blood visibility through the bandage which makes you breath a sigh of relief.
You feel the heli taking off and you glance over your shoulder to make sure all your boys got onboard in one piece.
“Any other injuries I should know about?” You shout over the sound of the Heli.
“Your gonna have some if you don’t bloody sit down and secure yourself!” Price yells back at you.
You back off sitting yourself down next to Gaz. He was still hurt badly, but at least now he was as stable as you could get him.
All things said?
That was a shit show.
2nd
You hummed as you fluttered around the med bay busily. Moving from one spot to the other, carefully taking inventory with your trusty clipboard in hand.
You were truly in your element, everything was calm, orderly, and you were free to just do your job without any interruptions.
The door to the infirmary swung open, hitting the wall with a bang! In came Ghost, dragging a whining Soap behind him.
Ghost looked seriously pissed off, his eyebrows were noticeably furrowed under his balaclava and his shoulders were hunched. If you were to rely on context clues the only reason Soap was here was because of Ghost’s firm grip on his bicep.
“Can I help you?” You ask, face completely dead-pan.
Ghost doesn’t respond, just roughly pushes Soap towards you. Now that you have a better look at him you can see that his shoulder looks… wrong to say the least.
“What did you do this time?” You sigh, walking over to grab Soap by his ear.
“Owww” Soap whines “Sure! Pick on the injured person why don’t ya?”
“How do you always get injured at base but never on missions?” You taunt, pulling Soap over to the nearest available gurney.
You gesture for him to sit down on the bed, and when you turn around you notice Ghost, still standing where you left him.
“Either sit down or leave Ghost, there’s no lurking in my medical bay.” You say, grabbing what you need to treat Soap.
Returning to Soap you gently push him down on his non-injured shoulder. “Y’know if you wanted me like this you could’ve just asked.” Soap taunts with a wink, prompting you to sigh.
Thankfully he’s in a tank top or you would have to cut off his shirt, you know from personal experience with treating him that when you have to do that he makes plenty of comments.
“Alright, this is probably gonna hurt like a bitch, don’t punch me.” You say as you put Soaps arm in the proper position for realignment.
“Wouldn’t dream of it la- OW WHAT THE FUCK.”
“All done” you quip, pulling off your gloves. You look back over your shoulder to see Ghost has moved to the foot of the gurney.
“What were you two even doing?” You ask, putting your supplies away and getting different ones out.
“Fuckin” “Sparing” They say at the same time.
You should’ve know better than to ask.
3rd
You can’t believe this. You can’t believe your boys. You knew they could be stupid sometimes but this is next level!
Thankfully most of them had gotten away with minor injuries, and somehow you had gotten out without a scratch, despite not even knowing the plan before they decided to execute it.
Soap and Ghost had only bumps and bruises, somehow, considering they were in the thick of their stupid plan. Gaz had a few scrapes and a sprained ankle, but you patched him up then set him off with a crutch and a promise to go easy on it. And the captain? You don’t even know how he managed it considering he’s supposed to be the smart one, but he broke his leg.
So now you are in the med bay, essentially holding your own captain hostage (not like he could get very far if he did decide to run off).
He is not a good patient. None of your boys are. He complains about being there, says how he wants to leave and how he wishes he could do things for himself. You understand that, but the best thing for him at the moment is rest, and he seems adamant on not taking it.
“Stitch”
“If you ask me if you can leave again I’m smacking you.” You say while walking over to him.
“I don’t suppose there’s any way for me to go get food is there?” He asks, looking far to innocent for his own good. He’s planning something. You just know it.
“I’ll call one of the boys to bring you something up.” You quip, already walking away, intent on y’know, doing your job.
“Stitch” You hear him call as soon as you walk away.
“Yes sir?” You question, turning around to stare him dead in the eyes.
“How long until I get out of this hell hole?”
“Until your leg heals or you get put on leave.”
“Leave?” He sounds actually startled at that proposition, prompting you to walk closer to him.
“Just for a few months sir, until your leg heals.” You soothe. As quick as the startled look in his eyes appeared it was gone. Masked down under his cool captain facade.
“You can have a few months of uninterrupted down time with your husband. Doesn’t that sound nice?” You ask, walking over to stand next to him, setting your hand on the knee of his uninjured leg.
“Have you met yourselves? You all will get killed without me here!” He exclaims, running a hand through his beard in exasperation.
“You’re one to talk sir.” You say deadpan. “Trust me the boys will be fine. They will be better off without you for a few months than they will be if they see you constantly cooped up in here.”
“Stitch, nothing good can possibly come from me not being here!”
“Sir,” you quip as you sit on the side of his gurney, “you need to give them more credit. They’re smart, strong, soldiers, and if you order them to they’ll hold themselves together until you return.”
“You think they can’t behave unless their ordered?” Price smirks.
“What can I say, I know them to well.”
“Hard to argue with that.”
4th
You woke up to a thudding in your head.
Thud, thud, thud.
Thud, thud, knock.
Knock, knock, knock.
As you come to, your groggy self realizes that loud, obtrusive noise is not coming from within your head, but outside it. You go to answer the door, (tripping over your blankets on the floor in the process) and find Ghost standing behind it.
You realize with a start that he’s in civvies, and has replaced his balaclava with a simple black face mask. While this should’ve been expected, it still comes as a surprise to you. They look unnatural on him.
“Ghost? What are you doing here?” You ask, trying not to scream on account of it being 3 am.
He nudges you to the side, walking in so you can close the door, and it’s then that you notice that his black shirt is getting even darker with blood.
“Ghost, what the fuck.” You sigh, grabbing his arm and pulling him towards your couch. “Stay here, I’ll be right back with first aid.”
You run to the bathroom, fling open the cabinet under the sink to grab the first aid kit and run back.
“If you ran like that during missions we might have to cover you less.” Ghost muttered.
“Oh shut up, what did you even DO.” You ask, pulling up his shirt with a pad of gauze ready in your other hand to staunch the bleeding.
You find the culprit quickly, a long but shallow gash along his side. It would need stitches, but thankfully you could do that here.
“How’s it look doc?” He mumbles, barely legible.
“You’ll be fine after some stitches but how did you even do this? We’re on leave.” You question, absolutely exasperated. You all were on leave and you still couldn’t catch a break from your idiot boys.
His response is mearly to grunt and look away from you.
“Alright then, well I’ll go ahead and clean it up for you alright?” You mutter.
You go through the motions, this is something you’ve done a million times. Clean, antiseptic, stitches, bandage, done.
As your putting everything away you notice Ghost is staring at the floor, and something about him feels… off.
As you go to put the first aid kit away you nudge his foot with yours, “You feelin’ alright bud? You can stay the night if you need.”
“‘M fine” he mutters, still not making eye contact.
“Wow that was convincing.” You dead pan as you walk away from him to go put up your first aid kit.
When you return to his side you gently rest your hand on his shoulder and say, “Listen, I don’t know what happened but you can stay here as long as you need. I gave you all this address for emergencies after all.”
He eyes you, before reaching up to your hand on his shoulder and giving it a squeeze, “Thanks Stitch”.
“Anytime.”
5th
You are starting to believe you’ve done something to piss off the gods.
You have just gotten back from leave and already the rest of your task force is sick. It started with Soap, who had come back to base with it, except he insisted it was nothing and went about training like he normally does. Him refusing to rest like you told him to led to him getting Ghost sick, not a surprise with how much they… “hang out.”
Next was Gaz, who despite you telling him not to, was adamant about treating them. When he inevitably fell to the illness he went whining about it to Price, who despite his best efforts, still got it. You suspect if he hadn’t still been trying to get his leg back to what it was before he broke it he could’ve outran him.
And then there was you. The sole survivor.
For some reason all of them had decided to wallow in your room, something about Soap insisting it had “healing properties” because your a medic. You told him to get out. He didn’t listen.
Gaz had curled up in your bed, Price had taken the couch, Soap curled up in your arm chair, and Ghost took the rug.
You were going to do so much cleaning once you managed to get these fuckers out.
But for now, you had to be in medic mode. So you went in. Armed with a face mask, gloves, everything antiseptic you could get your hands on, you started your plan: get the sick bastards out of my room.
The first step was making them feel better, so you decided on a classic sick food; chicken noodle soup.
You pushed the door to your room open with your back, on account of you carrying a heavy tray with 4 bowls of soup.
“Hiya boys, how are you feeling?” You chirped, setting the tray down on your desk. “I brought dinner if your feeling up to it.”
Much to your amusement Soaps head immediately shot up at the promise of food. “What did ya bring?” He rasped, the poor thing had lost most of his voice when he got ill and he was only now starting to get it back.
“Chicken noodle soup, although I’m not sure the bastard who started this whole mess should get any.” You quipped, even though you were actively handing him a bowl.
“Thank ya kindly.” He mumbled as he took the bowl from you. As far as your boys went Soap was the closest to looking like his regular self. Yes he didn’t have much of a voice, and his energy was way down from normal, but he was the least pale, and obviously the one with the most appetite.
“Anybody else want any?” You asked, glancing about your room turned sick bay.
From the corner of your room you saw Price weakly raise his hand from the couch. “Geez dramatic much?” You snorted out a laugh while handing him his bowl.
“Don’t bully the ill Stitch.” Gaz huffs from your bed.
“Your in my room, I’ll bully as much as I please.” You huffed “Now do you want soup?”
You saw Gaz lift his head to look at the soup questioningly before shrugging and nodding yes.
Once you had one bowl of soup left you looked down at the dark puddle on your rug. “Ghost, dinner time.” You chirped.
“Leave me to my death.” He moaned back at you.
“Oh you’re hardly dying, here sit up and eat something you’ll feel better.” As you spoke you gently crouched down to him and started repeatedly poking him on the shoulder.
“What do you want you heathen” he muttered as he finally sat up, only to have a bowl of soup forced into his hands.
“Eat.” You said.
“I’m not hungry.”
“I don’t care.”
Reluctantly Ghost pulled up his mask to his nose and began to eat his soup, with everyone fed you looked around to see if anyone was done.
Like you expected, Soap was already done and Gaz was about 2/3 of the way through his. Time for step 2, probably the hardest part: Medicine.
You walked over to your desk and looked through the bag you’d brought in with the tray. You were muttering curses under your breath when you finally found it. A bottle of NyQuil. Not only will it help their colds, it’ll also knock them out so you won’t have to deal with them! Win win! Looking over at Soap you decided he would be your first target.
Loading up a spoon with the liquid you carefully step over to Soap, trying to not set off any of his alarm bells.
“Can I take your bowl?” You ask him, making sure to have a normal tone that doesn’t give away your true intentions.
“Sure, thank ya.” He rasped handing you his bowl. Before he could fully take his hand off the bowl you whisked the bowl away and shoved the spoonful of medicine into his hand.
He stared at the spoon like it was poison, “Stitch, what IS this?” He questioned.
“Medicine.” You quipped back. “It’ll make you feel better. Maybe if you take it you can insist on training again to go infect more people.”
Soap let out a raspy groan, but despite his previous complaint he swallowed the medicine, making a comical face after tasting it, and handed the spoon back to you.
Your next, “victims” as you choose to call them, didn’t put up much of a fight.
Gaz didn’t complain once he realized you weren’t leaving him alone until he took it, and Price took it without a word. Overall, a pretty positive experience. Your next challenger however would be much more difficult.
You eye up Ghost, and decide at this point attempting to be stealthy is pointless, he’s already seen you carry out your plan, and thus you approach him with your ammo loaded spoon fearlessly.
“No.” He groans, voice muffled from how he’s laying face first in your rug.
“Ghost, it’ll make you feel better.” You try, but the mountain man simply acts as if he didn’t hear you. You start repeatedly nudging him with your foot, over and over and over again until finally he picks his head up to look at you.
You can’t see much of him because of the mask, but from what you can see his eyes are much more puffy and red than normal, and anyone could notice the subtle rasp to his voice that’s not normally there.
“You need to take the medicine.” You spoke calmly, like you were talking to a cranky toddler. “It’ll make you feel better. Plus everyone else already took theirs.”
“Well they’re weak.” He groaned, and yet he still snatched the spoon from you, shoved the medicine in his mouth, and then threw it back at you.
“Dramatic much.” You whispered to yourself, getting up to put everything away.
If there’s one thing you got from this experience it’s this:
You work with literal children.
~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~
1st
You felt like shit.
Not that you plan on letting that fact be known.
You’ve been attempting to put on some blush and concealer for the last 30 minutes in an attempt to make yourself look more alive. Your only responsibility today is a meeting to discuss your next mission so while it’s technically against dress code you don’t think anyone will notice, or if they do notice you doubt they will care.
Your body however seems to be stubbornly rebelling against your master plan to seem healthy. Your attempts to stand at your desk and put on makeup keep being thwarted as your head pounds any time you stand up and your vision blurs.
Despite your bodies valiant attempts to incapacitate you, you did manage to get your makeup on, put your clothes on, and get out the door.
Once you hobbled your way into the meeting room you saw that everyone was already there, as you took much longer than expected getting ready, which led to you being late.
“Damn Stitch you look… rough.” Gaz commented with a wince.
“Shut it.” You muttered, your voice already half gone.
When you woke up this morning you knew you were in for a hell of a week. You throat hurt like hell, and your voice was nearly gone. You kept coughing and sneezing and your head hurt horribly. All the same symptoms of what your boys had.
Despite your best efforts to get them out they had ended up staying for nearly a week. Soap left after about 2 days of rest, as he had it before the chaos started, but even with their ring leader gone the rest stayed put, with little signs of recovery. Due to this, your constant cleaning in between bouts of caring for them was futile, and 2 days after they recovered, it seems the inevitable happened. You caught it.
You sat with a thud in your normal seat next to Gaz, nodding at Price. “Sorry I’m late sir.” You grunted, barely able to get the words out.
“Are you feelin’ alright?” He asked, eyes narrowed at you suspiciously.
“Never better.” You lied.
Price was still eyeing you with suspicion, but he turned to begin the meeting anyway.
Nothing much of note happened during the meeting, except the fact that Gaz kept giving you looks of increasing concern, and every time you let out a muffled cough Ghost gave you a death stare. Soap looked at you more than Price for the whole meeting, despite him getting told off numerous times.
At the end of the meeting you moved to get up to retreat to your room, but as soon as you rose your head started spinning aggressively, the world blurred into one large mass of color, and then black.
~
You woke up with a start. Sitting up and immediately backing into the nearest corner you assessed your surroundings.
You were in your room, and the lack of light coming through the window let you know it was night. You must have slept a while as it was still morning when your meeting ended. Upon feeling a weight tighten on your waist you looked down and felt your cheeks grow warm.
Gaz was curled up right next to you, his arm wrapped around your waist. He was sleeping peacefully next to you, his body curled slightly. You thought it safe to assume he was curled around you until you shot up.
Looking around the room you saw the rest of your boys spread around. Ghost was lying peacefully on your rug (honestly you found his obsession with it a little concerning), with Soap half on top of him. Price was laying on your couch with his god-awful hat on his face, presumably to block out the nonexistent light.
Your thoughts were interrupted by a bout of violent coughing. Your lungs felt like stress balls as they were squeezed under the muscles of your chest, and in one violent motion you swung yourself out of bed and rushed towards the bathroom.
As you emptied your stomach contents into the toilet bowl you felt someone wipe away the sweat on your forehead and crouch down next to you.
“That’s it, get it all out.” You heard Soap mumble next to you.
As your stomach finished emptying itself and you spat into the toilet into an attempt to get the taste out of your mouth Soap gently leaned over to wipe your mouth for you.
You sat back on your haunches with your eyes closed, breathing heavily. You creaked your eyes when you heard multiple pairs of footsteps quickly approaching the door.
Ghost stood directly behind Soap, looking at you with poorly masked concern. Next to him, with a death grip on his elbow, was Gaz, who was not even trying to mask his concern at your state. Behind both of them peered Price, and while he displayed a glare on his face, you knew him well enough to know that was his way of showing concern.
“Respectfully Stitch, what the fuck?” Soap gently said next to you.
Instead of actually responding like all of your years of training and experience are screaming at you to do, your emotions take over and you start violently sobbing.
You feel miserable. You head feels like it’s stuffed full of cotton, your throat is on fire, all your limbs feel weighed down with lead, you can’t even stay awake long enough to walk to your own room and now your emotional state is such shit your violently crying in front of all of your boys.
The first one to react is Soap, who instantly tightly pulls you into a hug. The next is Gaz, who rushed over to tackle you- gently! In a hug. Price awkwardly walked over to sling an arm around you as well, and Soap turned around to grab Ghost by his ankle and drag him in.
“I-I’m sorry.” You gasped out between sobs.
In response to your statement Soap and Gaz’s arms tightened around you, pulling you impossibly closer.
Finally, Price spoke. “Alright crowding em’ isn’t gonna help anything. Soap make sure they brush their teeth then get them the fuck to bed. Ghost, grab the medicine they gave us and anything else that might help. Gaz make sure they have water and a Gatorade on their nightstand. I’m gonna run to medical and get them some anti-nausea medication.”
Hearing that your boys all scurried off to follow orders.
Soap carefully raised you up, and made sure you had steadied yourself against the counter before releasing you. He grabbed your toothbrush for you and put a generous amount of toothpaste on it. After he handed it to you and made sure you were good he started busying himself with anything he thought needed a bit of tidying around your bathroom. Which was apparently a lot.
As he worked he spoke lowly, “Gave us all quite a fright there. Thought you were hurt for a moment and rushed ya to the med bay. They told us you were just ill and had us bring ya to your room.”
You spat out your toothpaste and muttered between sniffles, “sorry.”
As you cleaned off your toothbrush and your mouth Soap approached you and pulled you in tight. “I know we annoy the hell out of you with our recklessness, but I don’t know what I would do without ya. You’re the glue that holds us all together, without ya’ we all would be dead 10 times over.”
As Soaps little speech ended someone cleared their throat behind you, prompting you to turn around.
There stood Gaz, leaning against the doorframe. “He’s right y’know.” He said softly, slowly approaching you. “We would fall apart without you. And if keeping you in good shape means tending to you while your vulnerable like you do for us so well, then we will do it happily.”
“Gaz, you all gonna make me cry again.” You sniffled, rubbing harshly at your eyes.
His eyes grew wide at that and quickly pulled you into another hug, “Please no.”
“Alright, alright. We need to get ‘em to bed. Let em’ rest and what not.” Soap said gently pulling you from Gaz.
“Right right.” And with that Gaz gently took your hand leading you towards your bed. Soap followed closely behind, keeping a hand on your shoulder the whole time, like he was scared you would fall over again (not that you can blame him).
As they settled you in Price came in through the door, carrying a bucket and a small pill in his other hand.
“Alright, this bucket is incase you get sick again.” He said, setting it down next to your nightstand. “And this pill is for your nausea.”
He handed you the pill and the glass of water Gaz had gotten for you earlier. As you took the pill Ghost finally walked over with the medicine he has taken way to long to find.
“Alright here ya go.” Ghost said, attempting to hand you the spoon once you took the pill.
You however, were apparently not sick enough to not cause problems on purpose as you leaned comically far away from the spoon.
When Ghost gave you a pointed look you simply shrugged and said “Revenge bitch.” Before grabbing the spoon and taking the medicine.
“Alright I think that’s everything.” Price started, “We’ll leave you alone now and let you rest. Come on boys.”
As they moved to leave something came over you, making you call out to them, “Wait, uh please wait. Can… can you all stay? Please?” As you spoke you curled up further into your blankets, attempting to hide yourself in them.
Soap was the first to react to your question. “Aww sure Stichey, of course we’ll stay!” He smirked, practically prancing over to you to playfully ruffle your hair.
You scoffed, already regretting your decision, and rolled over to face the wall muttering, “forget it.”
“No no no.” Gaz said, quickly walking over to you, making sure to give Soap a good smack on the back of his head on the way. “If you want us to stay we can stay. It’s the least we can do. Right?” At that last word he shot a pointed glare towards the other members of the 141st, who all made varying gestures of agreement.
With that figured out your boys all settled in. Gaz practically latched onto you, pulling you to his chest and tucking your head under his chin. Soap, feeling extremely left out, decided to snuggled into your back, wrapping his arms around your waist and nuzzling at the back of your neck. Soap waved Ghost over and with a sigh he slid his legs under everyone else’s and leaned half against Soap, half against the wall.
“Well looks like I can’t fit- what a shame,” Price began, only to have the back of his shirt grabbed by Gaz who proceeded to practically throw him over everyone onto Ghost, who promptly threw him off. He eventually settled in next to Ghost, half leaning on him, his legs fully intertwined with everyone else’s.
Once everyone was settled you felt incredibly comfortable. Your boys were all around you, and while yes, you still felt like shit, their heat and comfort more than made up for it.
The most important thing you got from this experience?
Your boys may be annoying sometimes, but there is nothing they wouldn’t do for you.
#key writing#cod mw22#mw2022#call of duty mw2#kyle gaz garrick x reader#kyle gaz garrick#gaz x reader#john soap mctavish x reader#john soap mactavish#soap x reader#john price#john price x reader#price x reader#simon ghost riley#ghost x reader#simon riley x reader#ghost cod#ghost mw2#modern warfare 2#modern warfare#mw2 Drabble#ghost x soap#(it’s in there a little bit you can’t deny it)
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i slept with someone from corroded coffin and all i got was this stupid song written about me.
ROCKSTAR!FBOY!EDDIE X READER
summary: fooling around with a famous rockstar who's a notorious playboy sounds perfect on paper, until you catch feelings for him. that's why you decide to end things, to not get your feelings get hurt, and its all going perfectly, until eddie releases a song, written all about you.
warnings: smut, p in v, MINORS DNI!!!!, pet names, praising?, lovey dovey, kinda angst and arguments, drgs & alcohol mention, swearing? idk this is kinda cheesy n cute with a mix of fluff sprinkled honestly!
author's note: the indented parts are texts between steve and reader and thenn reader and eddie. they look confusing as fuck im sorry i just wanted to make them look unique but they look stupid. also yes. i patted myself in the back after i found this title (thank you fob). and yes the lyrics are inspired by i don't care im on a fob kick sue me! and ofc fboy!eddie isn't actually that much of a fboy bc if i can't write lovesick eddie ill die. this is super cheesy so i still struggled a lot but UGH. not proof-read ignore all mistakes
also credits to @dumplingsjinson for the prompts! (i changed them but still!) and @saradika for the dividers! pls like + rb + interact w me in anyway to support my writings!! ty!!
DINGUS
sent you a spotify link.
did you listen to this?
yeah.
its kinda romantic.
no.
the lyrics are insane. n all about u
okay?
are u at the party rn?
yeah. u comin?
soon
he’s there too
u already knew that, didn’t u?
false accusations r rude, steve.
You click your phone off with a groan, but he was right. You couldn’t stay away from him, and maybe, just maybe, this was your way of running into him, accidentally.
Because ever since he released the song, the tabloids had gone crazy with it, half of the lyrics screamed you and all of the old headlines pointed at you, the mystery girl Eddie used to be seen with, and you really were growing tired of seeing your name next to “Munson’s new girl.”
Because you weren’t his new girl, you weren’t his anything. He was a cocky asshole who was good with a guitar and was even better at fucking. And that was something both of you could relate to, the only thing you had in common with him. Or, so you thought.
But of course, as with everything else, the things between you changed, you started staying over, he started staying over, and the two of you even went on fucking dates, disguising them under ‘we were just hungry, is all.’
You tried to keep up the cool girl act, like you could fuck someone and not catch feelings. Every inch of you itched not to care, to act like it was all fine, but it was all fucking bullshit, you cared, so fucking much that your chest ached. The more you got to know him, the more you fell for him, and the more you fell for him, the more you realized there was no fucking way this would work.
Cocky rockstar who spent more time doing drugs than sleeping, with girls all over him? The imaginary red flag bells rang in your ear, even now. He wasn’t looking for a relationship and you knew that. That’s why you ended it two months ago. Or at least, you started ignoring him two months ago.
Yet, he had been calling and texting you, wanting to meet up, drunken slurs of nonsense, gibberish voicemails, and yet you never answered, because if you did, you knew you’d be back to pathetically swooning over him.
Until today, just because of that stupid song, like it meant anything. That douchebag probably wrote songs about every girl he fucked.
You weren’t special.
Another ding sound from your phone almost startled you, the contact name made you groan even louder. “don’t FUCKING answer.” That didn’t mean shit. It was just something stupid to make you feel better that you couldn’t stay away from him, because you knew, deep down that if you really didn’t want him to contact you, you would’ve deleted his number, and blocked him. You were too chicken shit to do that, and still desperately wanted to hear from him.
So you settled on that contact name. Like it made a difference, like it changed anything.
DONT FUCKING ANSWER
did you listen to the song?
Don’t fucking answer. The contact name should be enough to convince yourself that.
Too late.
no.
don’t lie to me, sweetheart.
why would i lie?
You sink into the couch, a much quieter corner of the party, not even bothering to socialize. Your brows furrow, index finger flying to your lips anxiously, as you chew on it to patiently wait for an answer.
You sip on your drink with a nervous gaze on your screen, barely noticing the way the couch sink further when someone else took a seat next to you.
“Hi.” The gravelly voice pulls your attention away from the screen, making you set your drink aside as you look up, finding yourself face-to-face with him.
Shaggy bangs cascade onto his forehead, and with your exaggeration, it looks longer than the last time you saw him. Black jeans cladded with chains. A graphic tee messily thrown over his heavily tatted chest, that you could still imagine right about now—pathetic. He looked just about the same, the deep dimple adorning his soft cheeks had seemed to disappear, wearing a scowl instead, that tiny voice in your head told you that was your doing, that maybe he was just as miserable as you. Maybe your feelings weren’t fully one-sided.
Shit.
“Eddie?” Squeaky, and annoying, you were sure that’s how your tone sounded, yet he didn’t seem to comment on it.
“‘m glad you remember my name, sweetheart,” he scoffs sarcastically, leaning further into the plush couch, elbow propped at the side, eyeing you with frustration.
“W—what the hell are you doing here?” You stutter as if you weren’t expecting to run into him. Full of bullshit.
“Did ya really think you could ignore me forever, huh?” He tilts his head slightly, almost expectedly, earning an eye roll from you.
“I wasn’t ignoring yo—”
Eddie tuts quickly, his gaze locking onto yours with an intensity that cuts through the ambient noise of the party, “I thought we said no more lies, huh?”
With a huff, “Why are you here, Eddie?” you mumble.
“Am I not allowed to party?” He banters, brows slightly raised, making you huff out an exasperated breath, your eyes bore into him, almost to signal him ‘Take this seriously.’
“I wanted to know what you thought.” He shrugs like it was normal to just come running after everything just to know what you thought of the song.
“The song?” He nods in confirmation.
“Didn’t like it,” you confess, avoiding his gaze, but your brows betray you, lifting ever so slightly.
He tsks, shutting you off quickly, “You see that little quirk your brow did? That only happens when you lie, you can’t help it. You do that when I ask you if you ate the last pizza slice, or when I ask if you watched the next episode of the show we were supposed to watch together, or when you—”
“Fine, fine! I liked it,” you groan, interrupting him and suddenly standing up from the comfort of the couch, being so face-to-face with him immediately making your nerves bubble.
“Just liked?” He tilts his head slightly, a smirk curving on his lips.
A deep sigh of breath, “what do you want, Munson?”
He stands up with you, making you back away from him with a heavy footstep, the entire party was too loud and crowded, yet, in this stupid corner, it was just the two of you. “For you to admit that you loooved the song, and how much you missed me,” he sing-songs, taking a step closer to you, musky smell invading your senses, making you take a deep breath.
Both of you stand near the wall, and it should be awkward, it should be enough to make you leave, but all it does is draw you closer to him.
“You’re annoying.”
“Is that why you’ve been avoiding me?”
“I wasn’t avoiding—” He tuts, with his stupid index finger up, rejecting your lie.
“I—I don’t know what you expected.” You shrug, so nonchalantly that his gaze narrows, chest aching with the implications of your words.
“We both knew this wouldn’t last forever, didn’t we?” You chew the inside of your lip to stop those tears that had been begging to flow ever since you listened to the song, wiping off that smirk on Eddie’s lips.
“Would’ve been nice if I got a reminder, and not have been just fully ghosted, huh?” The brunette grumbles with a downturn of his lips, shaking his head in disbelief.
“Oh, don’t act all high and mighty, isn’t that what you do all the fucking time?” you snap, gaze narrowed, and arms crossed against your chest.
“Fuck girls and then leave them? Did it crush your ego this fucking much that I did before you could?”
“What the fuck does that mean?” He retaliates.
“It means I was smart enough to pull myself away from your bullshit,” you rasp, disdain written all over your face.The room seems to shrink as the distance between you decreases.
Another step closer to you, and you didn’t realize your back had hit the wall now. “My bullshit? God, that’s fucking rich, if I seem to recall correctly sweetheart, you were in this as much as I fucking was!”
“Oh, was I?” You bark out a chuckle, cruel, mocking, “I don’t remember being okay with you fucking half the city.” Realization of how bitter and jealous that sounds, dawns on you much later than the words leave your lips, and thankfully, Eddie’s too fucking immersed to realize the double meaning of your words.
“Are you fucking kidding? No strings attached! Non-exclusive! That’s what you fuckin’ signed up for!” His voice echoes, mirroring his frustration, and you open your mouth.
But he doesn’t let you speak further, cutting you off sharply. “Is this all because of that new guy you’re seein’?”
“What? What guy?”
“The one who was all over you earlier,” he bites out, jaw clenched, and you can almost taste his bitterness in the air.
“The same one you fucked at Jeff’s party.”
“Are you stalking me, Munson?”
“Did you just want an excuse to end things? Are the two of you serious or somethin’?” His voice wavered between anger and desperation, gaze pathetically searching for yours, to gauge your reaction.
You scoff. Did he really think you’d end things because of a stupid fling you had which in the first place occurred just so you could forget him? He was so goddamn clueless it drove you insane.
But what you didn’t realize was that you were just as clueless, if not more, because why would he write a song all about you, if this was just about sex? Because who would get so jealous of someone they didn’t care about?
Say my name and his in the same breath.
I dare you to say they taste the same.
The lyrics from his stupid song swirled your thoughts, yet you were still too stupid to see it, weren’t you?
Another step closer to you, a dangerous game the two of you liked to play. He smelled alluring, a fucked up mix of nicotine, his musky cologne, and that damn leather jacket. “Do you really think, he could compare to me, sweetheart?”
Say my name and his in the same breath.
“Tell me he’s fucking better, and he’s actually what you want, and I’ll fucking leave, I’ll bury all the other songs I wrote, tell me, and I’ll be out of your hair forever.”
I dare you to say they taste the same.
And just like that, all the defenses you put up, all the times you ignored him, they are cracked, disappearing into thin air. You hate it, you hate that he has this effect on you, you can feel your mind getting hazier, eyes blinking rapidly to process what the fuck is going on, and his face is mere inches away from yours. You knew their names didn’t taste the same. And you knew he could never ever compare to Eddie.
“Tell me,” he encourages, dares you to. You fail to notice how much emotion his gaze carries, how the corners of his lips twitch, just at the thought of you finally admitting you don’t want him. His stomach turns at the thought, this is his last chance, he knows that, and he can’t fucking lose you. He can’t.
And you don’t know any of that, but you knew, know that no one else could compare to him. And you hate yourself for thinking that, you hate yourself for falling for him, the world stops rotating on its axis when he’s in your peripheral vision, and it’s fucking disgusting. Pathetic. Stupid. Because you know the two of you have no chance. But here you are.
“H—he is b—” Of course, your brow quirks up almost immediately, betraying you quicker than you can even attempt to lie.
That dawning smirk appears on his lips again, it’s mocking, and just as much smug. You want to wipe it off of his stupidly pretty face. “Tell me,” he dares you, again. This time much cockier and confident, and you suddenly realize how small you feel under him.
“He isn’t,” your meek voice is barely audible.
And you don’t register the shaky breath he draws when the words leave your lips, giving him the confirmation he needs. You wanted him, he had no fucking clue why you ghosted him, yet you still wanted him. Just as much as he wanted you.
Both of his hands were placed on the wall now, towering over you, making your breath get caught up in your throat. “Speak up.”
“No, fuck! You know he’s not, you know he could never fucking compare to you, you fucking know tha—” He shuts you up with a rough kiss, lips pressed against yours messily, letting the petty comments die down your throat. Because this is all he wanted, needed to hear anyway.
“Up,” he grunts into the kiss, tapping your thighs, hoisting you up from your waist to help you wrap your legs around him, tight, he wants you at his mercy, locked to him.
You wrap your legs around him, barely, the melty sensation in your knees making you so shaky that he barks out a laugh into your lips, holding you close, firm, the butterflies in your stomach traveling all across your body.
He lifts you up as if you are weightless, arms wrapped around you strongly as he carries you to the nearest empty bedroom, impressively without hitting your back anywhere, so roughly that your core throbs at the feeling of his arms around you.
“Baby,” he mutters as he lowers you down on the bed swiftly, smooth, gaze darkened and pupils blown wide, all the pent up desire waiting to explode.
“Eddie,” you beg, shaky voice sounding purely angelic to his ears once he got rid of his shirt, shrugging it off with a huff, his fingertips grazing against your top, feeling your hardened nipples, causing gasps out of you, he’s quick to pull it over your head while you run your fingers up the grooves of his stomach, the tip of your fingertips almost burns everywhere you touch.
He groans at the sight of your bare breasts, “missed thi-you,” he corrects himself, because that’s all he wanted anyways, you.
He nips at your nipples, tongue good at giving attention to both of them, all wet and warm, making you squirm under his touch, you’re quick to get rid of everything else, leaving you in your panties, making him grunt.
The pad of his thumb rubs against your left nipple, leaving goosebumps in its wake, while his other hand travels down your chest, then your stomach, finally drawing circles when it stops between your thighs, ghosting over your panties before he tugs them down your legs, spreading them apart with a slight hum, pupils blown so wide that you can’t admire those chocolate hues anymore.
He visually drinks in that sight of you, laid down on the couch, eyes squeezed shut, back arched, and he hasn’t even touched you yet. You’re completely at his mercy and his chest aches with need. “So pretty like this f’me,” he coos into your chest, pushing his middle finger inside of you. Making you feel so good that you can’t stop the gasps coming out of your lips.
Pleasure shivers through everywhere he sucks and touches, his finger eases into you when he adds another one, a moan escaping you quickly. “Need to be in here, sweetheart, d’ya have any idea how much I missed this?”
You don’t. You don’t know about the sleepless nights, the drunken ones, the drug-induced ones in an attempt to recreate the high you gave him. It’s fucked up, it’s insanely toxic. Yet, he can’t get enough of you.
His gaze upon you is dangerous, maybe it’s because he had missed you so goddamn much, or maybe because he didn’t know where this would lead, but it felt fucking sentimental, different somehow, and he could feel you, everywhere on his skin.
Your hips start rocking up against him when the pad of his thumb flicks over your clit, making you arch your back, whines, mumbles leaving your lips. And all he can muster is, “so goddamn beautiful, look at you whining for me.”
You can feel his bulge rub against your thigh every now and then, it’s distracting, almost agonizing. You desperately need it inside of you, you had missed him, missed his touch, missed the feeling of him filling you to the brim, you missed seeing his face contort in pleasure when he was inside of you, you wanted him to never forget you again.
That’s why you feel so numb, can barely speak, and of course, Eddie notices, how unusually quiet you are, and he wants to make this unforgettable, just so you have another reason to come back to him. Just so you don’t leave him, just so you stay forever.
“Gone too quiet on me, honey, tell me what you need,” he coos down at you, thumb still caressing your pussy, and all you can fucking do is chew down on your bottom lips, eyeing his bulge that was begging to get out. And he barks out a goddamn chuckle, “P—please, Eddie.” Pathetically leaves your lips.
And normally he would make you beg, tease further, but he reaches to tug down his pants quickly, because fuck, he had missed you. And he can’t bear the thought of not being inside of you any longer.
Thinking is not your strongest suit right now either, your brain is mushy, all the nights and days spent thinking about him, about this explodes into your body. Your pussy aches when you finally see his cock again, a sound of need leaving your lips as you eye his length, so big that pleasure ripples through you, especially when you see his gushy tip, glistening with pre-cum.
You want every fucking inch inside of you, and Eddie’s more than ready to oblige, “What do you need, baby? Tell me.”
“Need you, Eddie,” you moan, all fucked out, his fingers slip in and out of you still, but it isn’t enough for him. He needs more, he craves your validation like he never has before.
“God, you’re soakin’ my fingers, princess,” he grunts, wedging himself between your thighs, weeping cock drips onto your inner thighs, making you moan breathlessly. “Tell me exactly what you fuckin’ want, honey.”
“Eddie.” His name sounds like silk, even when it’s so lewd, Eddie decides, and it makes him let out an impatient huff. “P—please. Need you to fuck me.” It’s so goddamn desperate that you can feel heat rise to your cheeks, but it’s everything to him.
“Want you to fuck me like you mean it.”
“Oh, that’s easy, sweetheart,” he grunts, lining his cock through your entrance, coating himself in your slick, enjoying your mewls before he doesn’t hesitate to push his cock inside of you, inch by inch, relishing the way you cry out for him.
Greedily, you rock your hips into him, making him let out a frustrated groan. “Have no fuckin’ idea how much I missed this greedy cunt, sweetheart, shit.” He thrusts in a few more inches, and breathless moans and babbles of his name fill the air.
“Suckin’ me right in, baby, fuck, you’re so pretty like this, mhmm.” His cock moves inside of you, and your hands are wrapped around his back, desperately clawing at it, the fullness making you want more, “you like that, baby, like bein’ full of me?” A heavy sound leaves his lips, pathetic and you pulse around him.
“S’so good Eddie, and s’big,” you barely manage to let out, and he watches you with that burning amber gaze, thrusting all the way in without hesitation. Those plushy lips that hang open, that filthy mouth, the prettiest fucking features—you, were going to be the death of him.
Maybe it’s because you had missed him, or maybe because you hadn’t experienced this in a long time, or fuck, maybe, just maybe that the song had created a new type of need between the two of you. Using sex as a sort of connection that the both of you desperately needed. But, shit, was it this different this time.
He felt different—his lips, touch, skin as it slapped against yours, it was different.
Full. You feel so fucking full that your back involuntarily arches against him, fingers clenching desperately, your screams and cries filling the room the more he plunges inside of you, deeper, hungry, and just as greedy as you.
“Yeah, better than that asshole?” It rolls off his lips so bitter and jealous that you can barely register it. Not being used to this possessive side of him, and it’s glorious, especially when he’s pounding his frustrations and insecurities into you.
“Mhmm, so much better.” You clawed at his back, every thrust of his hip making you feel higher and higher, mind filled with nothing but him.
“So pretty like this when you say my name, sweetheart… so goddamn beautiful, and all mine, yea?” He wants a confirmation, and wants to hear you say it, his head ducking between your breasts again to kiss, taste, suckle them. Make sure he never forgets it.
“Wanna hear you say it.” He hums, the vibrations reverberating through your chest straight into your core, cock plowed so deep inside of you that you can barely speak through your cries, hitting that sweet spot that every other asshole misses.
You’re too scared to give him what he wants. But you feel him, everywhere, and you still want more, of course, you’re his. That’s all you fucking wanted anyway. Plushy lips shake as you gaze up at him, his amber hues are so sticky-sweet that you still struggle to process it, words come out in a ramble “All yours, Eddie.”
His mouth crashes onto yours roughly, desire coursing through both of your bodies, almost interconnected. “Shit, fuckin’ hell sweetheart, ‘m not gonna last long.” His thrusts are getting sloppier, yet you feel the ravaging desire coursing through your veins.
“So perfect,” he murmurs, the kiss he lays on your lips just as relentless, not letting you breathe or think for a goddamn second, you’re so goddamn close.
And you wonder, how the fuck did you even go two months without this? Without him?
“Eddie!” You cry out once you feel the pad of his thumb rubbing against your clit, eyes squeezed shut as your orgasm washes over you. Pure bliss overtakes you while you claw at his back, his body tenses, and cock flexes as he cums inside of you, groans and curses left in your hair.
Minutes pass of you lying next to each other, breathless, processing everything that just transpired. And you should feel guilty, embarrassed, and should run to the hills for doing this with him again.
But you’re obsessed, addicted. He’s like an excitement that you’re sure you’ve never felt before, running through your veins, like a fucking drug.
Both of you get dressed in silence, the party booming outside is quick to bring the two of you back to reality, and out of the trance that he pulled you in.
He breaks your bewilderment with a slight “Fuck.” Standing on the opposite side of the bed before he fully turns to you. “This wasn’t—I was supposed to talk to you.” He mutters, fingertips anxiously running through his tousled hair.
Caught off guard and awfully curious, you mumble, “About what?”
“The song…”
“I told you I liked it.”
His brow furrows deeper, and he shakes his head in frustration. “No, that’s not it—uh, did you not listen to the lyrics?”
“I did.”
“And?”
Your face searches his for some clarity, you take a step closer to him, the distance between the two of you was still awfully much according to him. “What are you asking of me, Eddie? Did you really think one song would just solve everything?”
“You don’t get it, do you?”
“W—what am I supposed to get Eddie? You wanna have your cake and eat it too! And I just can’t fucking do that, not anymore.”
“That’s—that’s not it!” His voice wavers, with urgency, and desperation in his tone. He takes a step forward, attempting to bridge the emotional gap, feeling so fucking frustrated that he wants to rip his hair out.
“Then fucking explain it to me!” You plead.
“You want an explanation, fine! Fucking fine!” His frustration echoed through the room, pacing back and forth, making you take a deep breath.
Was he… actually gonna do this?
“You wanna know what the fuck I’ve been doing ever since you ghosted me?” He ran a hand through his hair, scared, gaze all mellow and vulnerable in a way you have never seen before. It makes your shoulders slump when you nod.
“I go to those stupid Hollywood parties, meet asshole rockstars—the most interesting shit, yet somehow someway the thought of you will pop up in my mind, uncalled for, might I add, and then I can’t stop thinking about it, can’t stop thinking about you the whole fucking day.” Your eyes widen, trying to absorb his revelation, yet he won’t stop rambling and you feel your chest tighten with each word, fuck, he’s finally doing it.
“I—I never—shit! I never thought myself capable of feeling things like this, but fuck, you came along, with that goddamn smile, throwing a manicured middle finger right in my face, a—and just put up with my bullshit.” His voice softened, and he couldn’t help but trace the contours of your face, to desperately know if you were on the same boat, and you look at him with such glistened eyes that his heart leaps to his stomach.
“My world flipped upside down, and you have proven me, so goddamn wrong that I don’t even know who the fuck I am anymore!” The tears almost welled in your eyes, because, fuck, there was no way this was real.
You reached out instinctively, the corner of your mouth twitching uncontrollably. “E—Eddie, please… please stop saying things you don’t fucking mean.”
“Things I don’t mean?” He gives you a breathy chuckle, ironic, and nowhere near funny. His eyes bore into yours, intense and searching. “Do you think I like feeling whatever the hell this is? I fucking don’t, you have me acting like someone I’m so unfamiliar with, to the point where it scares me. All I can think about is you, you, you, because you occupy every single space of my mind.” Your eyes soften, the room seemingly pulsing with his emotions, making you feel hot everywhere on your body.
He felt the same way.
Eddie felt the same way.
“B—but fuck I’m scared, honey, I’m so goddamn scared,” He admits, the vulnerability in his voice cutting through the tension before he’s at your side, calloused hands grabbing you by the shoulder, so softly that you melt into him.
“Because what if—what if all of this comes crashing down one day?” His voice trembles, gaze avoiding yours, he was scared, so goddamn scared of losing you. Forever. He doesn’t want that, he couldn’t afford that.
“Just two months away from you fucking sucked. I didn’t—I don’t wanna feel these things, but you make it so hard not to.” His forehead rests against yours, making you suck in a deep breath, it’s all so fucking sentimental, and all you wanna do this kiss him, tell him you feel the exact same way. Tell him about your fears.
“And now I can’t fucking stop, fuck,” He confesses, admission punctuated by a frustrated sigh.
“I wrote you a song,” he gently caresses your cheek, and you’re so scared to look up at him, to meet his tender gaze, because you know you can’t hold yourself back.
“I came over to this party in a frenzy when I found out you’d be here,” he continued, his fingers tracing a delicate pattern along your jawline. “I—I just I haven’t even been able to touch another girl.” Your eyes snap open, you’re sure they’re almost heart-shaped now, with the adoration you look at him.
“And, do you actually fucking think I'd write songs for just anyone—” His question lingers in the air before you shut him up with a kiss, rough, sweet, and making Eddie feel dizzy all over, his head struggles to comprehend it all, breathless but he manages to react just in time.
The booming music becoming a mere background noise when he had you, mind swirling with all the possibilities and mouth begging to never stop tasting you. He wants to let you completely engulf him, feel you everywhere.
Everything he wanted and more.
He fucking hates himself for doing this, but he pulls away, mesmerized, eyes so wide that you can’t believe this is Eddie, he’s all flustered, salmon pink. And it makes a wider grin sit on your lips. “So… you—uh, what does this mean?”
You smile at him, lips widely stretching into a grin, as you shrug. “It means I feel the same, Eddie.” you admit, tone a tender reassurance. “That’s why I tried to shut you out… to try to move on, because I was scared—fuck, but I feel the same way.”
“So, does that mean we're dating now?”
“We can take things slow, figure everything out?” you mutter with a shy gaze, lips itching to twitch into a smile, again. “But I—uh—I like you, I really, really like you.”
“Gone soft on me already, sweetheart?” he mumbles with a stupid grin, making you elbow him softly, with an exaggerated playful huff.
He’s quick to flinch, rubbing his arm as if you even delivered a powerful blow. “Ow—what the hell is wrong with you?”
“You think I’m going soft? You’re the one who wrote his feelings as an exaggerated love song!”
He leans further slightly, his grin widening when you gave him those adorable eyes, finding you both equally amusing and endearing. “Oh… just you wait.”
You arched a brow, curiosity piqued, “What the hell does that mean?”
“The album is coming out soon, sweetheart. If you think this was an exaggeration, you should hear the whole fucking thing.”
That glint re-appears in your eyes just as quickly, gaze softening as you melt into his embrace.
“You’re an idiot, Eddie Munson.” You tease, scrunching your nose at him, so adorably that he leans down and presses a gentle kiss onto your hair.
He's an idiot, a total complete fucking idiot, but he's all yours.
#eddie munson x reader#eddie munson fanfic#eddie munson imagine#eddie munson smut#eddie munson x y/n#eddie munson
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