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fanficimagery · 1 year

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Girl in the Painting

After taking a closer look at Xavier's paintings, Wednesday realizes he wasn't having dreams of her at all. But she does know the girl in the paintings and she's decided that this one good deed shouldn't kill her.

Words: 6.6K Author's Note: Wednesday AU. I'm well aware Xavier never had dreams of Wednesday; he just painted her because he'd seen her and "instantly fell in love". For this, however, I'm saying he's dreamt of her, possibly even before she showed up to Nevermore, and she realizes later on she was never actually the center of his dreams. Also, TRIGGER WARNING for mentions of past attempted sexual assault. It's brief.

As the students of Nevermore are packing up and readying themselves for their trips home, a group of girls are sitting around the charred fountain in the courtyard.

"So what are your plans for summer?" Bianca asks, fingers skimming the water. The dark skinned siren smiles when Enid blushes prettily, her gaze immediately darting to the ever stoic Wednesday. She's been wondering, as of late, if Enid's feelings towards Wednesday were leaning towards romantic rather than platonic.

"Going to Wednesday's home," Enid finally says. "Gonna spend a couple of weeks with the Addams' family."

"Yeah? I didn't think our resident living dead girl was into slumber parties."

"It's going to be a blast," Wednesday deadpans. Yoko chuckles, sipping on whatever concoction she's mixed up that satiates her bloodlust. "You two are more than welcome. Apparently the more, the merrier."

"Sorry," Yoko muses, "but the coven's gonna travel all summer. I'm quite looking forward to it."

"Mmm. And as much as I'm loving the new attitude, I got some things to take care of before we come back to Nevermore," Bianca says, her silver eyes glowing just the faintest. She really couldn't wait until she finished this favor for her mother and her new creep of a husband. "Besides, I can't be seen painting the nails of the girl responsible for my break-up with Xavier so soon. I at least gotta make it seem like I've made you sweat."

Wednesday just blinks at Bianca's reasoning, but Enid frowns. "Wait, what? I thought you broke up because Xavier was being his emo artistic self?"

Yoko grins around the straw of her drink. "She wishes."

"I actually found a sketch of Wednesday in his journal before I even knew who Wednesday was," Bianca confesses. "Here. Look." She takes her phone out of her pocket, scrolling through her pictures. "I snapped a pic to see what I could find out online, but shockingly nothing was solved until Wednesday showed up here."

"I find social media to be a soul-sucking void of meaningless affirmation."

"Yep. Sounds like you," Bianca says. "Look. See? He drew this before you even stepped foot behind Nevermore's gates."

Wednesday takes the phone and Enid leans closer to take a look. Both girls scrutinize the sketch, both equally baffled to see who everyone has assumed was Wednesday herself smiling. But just as Wednesday is about to hand the phone back, something catches her eye and she brings the phone closer to her face to scrutinize it.

"I can see why you thought this was me," Wednesday says, "but I assure you, it is not me who's apparently caught Xavier's fancy."

"No?" Bianca huffs. "Sure as hell looks like you."

Yoko nods. "Could have fooled me."

"I thought it was me as well, but this sketch proves me wrong. Look here." Wednesday zooms in on the picture, focusing on the right eyebrow. "You see that scar? I don't have it."

Bianca stares before rolling her eyes and reclaiming her phone. "So Xavier gives you a flaw and you immediately don't think it's you?"

"It is not a flaw. It's a sign of strength." Bianca, and the ever-smiling Enid and Yoko frown at the tone Wednesday has now taken on and the steely glint in her eyes.

"What are you talking about?"

"A couple of years ago, me and my siblings decided to walk into town after a tiring day at school. A group of older teenage boys cornered us down an alley, and they held me and Pugsley back while making us watch as they tore at the clothes on my sister's back. They mocked her tears and promised that whatever they did to her, no one would believe her since even our sheriff hated outcasts like us. They wanted to break her because we were different. But in a bout of bravery that I will forever be proud of her for, she took the small blade our uncle Fester gifted her and stabbed one of her attackers. In return, they hit her in the face with half a brick and fled with their friend."

"Shit." Bianca blinks in surprise. "Is your sister okay?"

"She's fine. They only left her with a scar and a fear of normies. She used to have the social personality that Enid possesses, but now she haunts the halls of our home rather than leaving it. I tried to get her to attend Nevermore, but even I failed in doing so. Xavier's sketch though, it shows her smiling. That tells me she will be okay."

"So… Xavier only thinks he's infatuated with you?" Yoko wonders.

"It appears so. But if I can manage to get him to my home, maybe he'll see for himself it wasn't me he was having dreams of."

Bianca huffs a laugh. "Sounds fun. Now I'm really glad I can't make it to your slumber party. The breakup is still too fresh to see him fawning over someone else. Maybe the time away will do me some good."

"This sounds like my kind of drama." Yoko sighs wistfully. "Too bad I'll have to miss it."

"Yes, well, Xavier did gift me this phone." Wednesday pulls out a sleek iPhone. "Perhaps if I had your number, I could text you updates. Or death threats."

"Done and done. Gimme." Yoko happily takes Wednesday's phone, typing her information into it. Then taking a selfie, she hands the phone to Bianca who does the same, but makes sure Wednesday understands that she doesn't want any updates.

"We're going to have so much fun!" Enid happily bounces in place, accepting Wednesday's phone to type in her own information. "I can't wait to meet your family."

At 001 Cemetery Lane, a gothic looking manor stands tall and proud behind a sentient gate.

With your fingers running through the dust along the wall, you quietly walk down the hallway as your sister's friend can be heard babbling on and on. Enid Sinclair had shown up only a couple of days ago, her bubbly personality breathing life into your usually dark home. You'd have kept your distance had you not learned she was from Nevermore, but upon learning she was a werewolf, you found yourself leaving your room while there was a guest in your home.

Halfway down the staircase, the doorbell ominously tolls and Lurch appears from the next room over to answer it. You freeze, wondering who would dare walk up to your house.

Lurch opens the door and your breathing ceases for a moment at the sight of a teenage boy standing there. He's around six feet tall, give or take a couple of inches, and he sheepishly runs a hand through his chin length hair.

"Hey, uh, is Wednesday home?" He's staring up at Lurch who's towering over him, nervously tugging at the sleeves of his coat which seem to be torn on one arm. Lurch turns and looks up at you, and you startle when the boy's gaze lands on you. His brow furrows before he smiles. "Hi. I, uh, I think your gate tried to eat me."

Your lips faintly twitch and your heart rate starts to slow. If he knows Wednesday and isn't freaking out too much about Gate, there's a good chance he's from Nevermore as well. "He's temperamental. You need to be quick to avoid his swing." Then without waiting for a response, you turn around and call out, "Wednesday! There's a boy at the door for you."

A small weight lands on your shoulder and you grin at the sight of Thing. He trembles excitedly, tapping and pointing and making gestures as you giggle at his enthusiasm.

"Oh, hey Thing! Long time no see." When you glance back at the door, the boy is now inside your home with the door shut behind him and Lurch nowhere to be found. Thing scrambles off your shoulder and rushes towards the boy, and it's not until the boy squats down to fist bump Thing that you catch yourself admiring how cute the boy is. Immediately you shut that thought down and wipe any form of amusement from your expression. Then when the boy glances back at you, he stands tall and smiles yet again. "I'm Xavier Thorpe," he then introduces himself.

"YN," you deadpan. You hear Wednesday's nearly silent footfalls behind you and nod at him before you take a step back up the staircase. "Enjoy your stay here. Don't touch Mother's plants. They bite."

As you turn around, you're unsurprised to find Wednesday looking right at you. Her eyebrow twitches, your eyes narrow, and you clasp your hands behind your back before marching back up the stairs.

At the top of the staircase, Enid is practically beaming at you. "He's cute. Right?"

"Ask my sister. He's her guest."

"What? They're not-"

But you pay her no mind and trace your steps back to your room.

At the bottom of the staircase, Xavier watches as Wednesday's sister disappears. "How long have you known?" He asks.

"That it was my sister you've been having dreams of and not me?" He gives her a deadpan stare and Wednesday nearly smiles. "Only since our last day at Nevermore. Bianca showed me the first picture you ever drew and the scar in her eyebrow tipped me off. You're welcome."

Enid skips down the stairs, sighing as she approaches her friends. "Well you're going to have your work cut out for you, Xavier. She thinks you're here for Wednesday."

"Technically, I am." He shrugs.

"And now you're here for her," Wednesday says. "Protect her heart. You so much as bruise it and I'll dissect yours."

Xavier blinks in shock and Enid giggles, skipping to his side and hooking her arm with his. "Let the wooing begin."

Over the past couple of days, you keep your distance from Wednesday's friends. You've heard them around the house, sure, but only managed to really be in the same room as them when you all had dinner as a family. You always sat between Wednesday and Pugsley, across from Enid and Xavier, but your eyes never strayed too far from your plate.

One morning, you have the urge to visit what used to be your favorite part of the manor.

The sunroom towards the back of the manor used to be your space- filled with vibrant flowers, plants, and vines and even a small fountain in the corner. But ever since the incident, you've tried to find solace in the one place you loved, only to have everything you touch wilt right before your very eyes. And now- now the sunroom is filled with black and gray and brown plants.

Finding what used to be a rose, your mother's favorite flower, you pick it up and gently cradle it in the palms of your hands. One of its petals crumbles beneath the pad of your thumb and it takes everything in you to not cry.

"I was wondering where you've been sneaking off to." The voice startles you and you turn to see Xavier standing under the archway of the entrance. His hair is pulled back into a small knot at the back of his head, a few strands left loose, and you quickly squash down the thought that he looks really cute like this. "Sorry," he then apologizes. "I thought you would have heard my footsteps."

"...no worries."

You turn back around, gently laying the dead flower back down. Exhaling softly, you then move towards the door leading outside, unsurprised when you hear footsteps following you. "So this place is… awesome."

You huff a laugh, stopping just inside the door and only peering outside towards the family cemetery. "Believe it or not, it wasn't always like this. I used to be able to breathe life into this room."

"Yeah?"

"Mhm. Now everything I touch seems to die."

"Oh I wouldn't say that."

"Really? Take a look around, Mr. Thorpe. I did this." Xavier takes a look around, frowning and trying to understand you. Exhaling softly again, you paste on a friendly grin and turn to face him. "If you're looking for my sister, she and Enid have Uncle Fester in the electric chair up in the attic."

He barks out a surprised laugh. "What?"

"He loves it." You shrug. Then as you're walking away, you say, "Fair warning; if Uncle Fester tells you to pull his finger, don't."

"Why? Because his farts are killer?"

"No. Because he'll electrocute you."

You leave Xavier chuckling in your wake, finding it a little easier to be in your sister's friends presence.

Then two days later, it's your turn to find Xavier in the sunroom. His hair is back in the little knot that you couldn't stop staring at, dressed in paint splattered clothes as he stands in front of an easel.

When he catches sight of you, he offers you a smile before he focuses on his canvas once more. You continue walking closer and when he doesn't say anything, you walk around to see what he was inspired to paint. Surprisingly, it's a black and white portrait of your sister sitting behind her cello mid-stroke.

"Oh wow," you breathe in awe. "Xavier, this is amazing."

"You think so?"

When you chance a glance at him and notice the faint pink surrounding his cheek bones, you smile genuinely at him. "Of course. You're really talented."

"Glad you think so." Xavier steps back, looking at his work as he stands side by side with you. "Wednesday, uh, she played the cello one night and it was amazing. No one thought her capable of it."

"Why? Because she's death incarnate?"

Xavier chuckles, bashfully averting his gaze. "Something like that." Then looking at the painting once more, he says, "Your mother saw one of my pieces at Nevermore and asked if I could recreate it so she could hang it here."

You nod in understanding, unable to tear your eyes away from the way Xavier has captured your sister. Then right before your eyes, the painting slowly comes to life- Wednesday's bangs blowing in the wind, one hand pushing and drawing the bow across the cello strings as the other holds down certain strings in a muted song.

You quietly gasp, eyes widening in surprise. You watch in awe before turning towards your companion, only to find him holding his hand out towards the painting with his eyes closed. "Oh." You utter in realization. "You're gifted and then you're literally gifted."

Xavier's eyes open and he nods, eyes sparkling. "I have the gift of animation."

"Marvelous."

You continue staring at the painting, finding the foundation of your walls quaking and feeling a bit more comfortable in the presence of the boy who has decided to share his power with you.

You're so used to sitting between your siblings at dinner that you're thrown for a loop when you find Enid in your usual place. Your eyes narrow suspiciously, but Enid and Pugsley merely smile while Wednesday arches an eyebrow at you.

Xavier fidgets nervously in his chair, smiling sheepishly at you. "Come on. I don't bite," he muses as he gestures to the empty seat.

Against your will, you blush.

"Pity," Wednesday drawls. "I think my sister would have quite liked that."

"Wednesday!" Your mortification makes Enid giggle. You nervously take your seat before your father takes your mother's hand, pressing kisses to the back of her hand and all the way up her arm where he then proceeds to mockingly bite her. "Oh my god. You're all so embarrassing."

"They're cute." Enid beams at your parents' affectionate behavior.

"Someone drown me," you mumble.

"Only after dinner," your mother says.

Xavier snorts and you briefly flash him a grin before fiddling with your utensils.

Lurch brings the food out, everyone having a pasta dish with the exception of Enid who'd been brought out a medium-rare steak. You quietly dig in, gaze darting from person to person as the conversation flows around you.

Eventually, when the dessert is brought out, Enid addresses the younger crowd.

"So the cinema is playing a werewolf movie and I really want to go see it and make fun of it. Is anyone else interested in going?"

"Sure." Xavier shrugs. "Sounds fun."

Wednesday sighs. "If I must."

"I have plans with Thing," Pugsley says, smiling apologetically at Enid.

All eyes turn towards you and you fight the urge to shrink in your seat. You gulp, but before you can come up with an excuse to not have to leave your house, your mother is urging you to go. "It sounds like fun, sweetheart. Surely you'd love to go with your sister and friends."

"I-"

It's been years, darling," your father says. "I think it's time to get back out there. You're not that naive little girl anymore, mija."

You let your mouth close, everyone ignoring Xavier's, "Am I missing something?"

Wednesday's giving you her usual deadpan stare whereas Enid is smiling and nodding, encouraging you to go. Both your parents are smiling, anticipating your answer, but what makes you cave is the fact that a part of you actually wants to go. You want to be somewhat of a normal teenager, being out and about with your sister, Enid, and a cute boy.

Reluctantly, your shoulders sag and you give a nod. "Fine. I'll make an attempt."

"I'll take it!" Enid blurts.

Wednesday looks pleased with your answer and you finish the rest of dinner without uttering another word.

Then the next evening, you're being picky about what outfit you should wear. You'd taken to wearing different shades of black and gray, but tonight you want to look good. All your dresses and skirts are out of the question, and eventually you settle on a pair of burgundy plaid leggings and a black sweater crop top. You fix your hair to your liking and then slip your feet into a pair of black combat boots before lacing them up tightly. Then deeming yourself ready, you shove your phone, cash, and ID into a miniature backpack that is adorned with skulls and crossbones.

Inhaling and exhaling deeply, you finally make your way downstairs.

Wednesday, Enid, and Xavier are waiting for you, and when Wednesday sees you… a smile slowly blossoms as she takes you in.

"What are you-" Enid turns around and her jaw drops. Then she beams and practically hops in place in her excitement. "You're wearing something other than black!"

Xavier turns, his gulp very obvious. "Wow." You think he must've wanted to keep that to himself because he blushes and nervously runs a hand through his loose hair. "You, uh, you look nice."

You arch an eyebrow at him, grinning. "Thanks."

Walking past them, you walk outside to where Lurch is waiting by the car to drive you into town. He hums when he sees you and you wrinkle your nose at him as he opens the back door for you. You climb in to sit on the bench seat directly behind the driver's seat, holding in your surprise when Wednesday and Enid shove Xavier in right behind you. He practically falls into his seat, righting himself as smoothly as he can, and Wednesday and Enid take their seats across from you.

Enid and Xavier keep the conversation flowing with you and Wednesday occasionally humming in response.

After several long minutes of driving, Wednesday is instructing Lurch where to drop you all off. It's a couple blocks away from the cinema, but your sister apparently wants to go for a brief walk. Though the second your feet are on the pavement and Lurch drives away, you freeze.

"Hey. You okay?" Xavier asks.

Your hands are gripping the straps to your backpack and you gulp, subconsciously stepping closer to him when he gently touches your elbow. "Y-Yeah."

"Come on. Wednesday will leave us behind if we linger."

"Mhm."

Gently pulling on your arm, you stiffly follow Xavier. Your eyes are peeled for anyone staring, hands tightening on the straps of your bag. The only time you feel yourself exhaling with relief is when Xavier puts himself between you and the street, letting you take the part of the sidewalk that's closest to the buildings.

Enid and Wednesday are walking in front of you, elbows linked, and occasionally Enid giggles over her shoulder when she glances back at you. But you're too paranoid to pay her any mind and try to focus on the silent strength that Xavier is unknowingly offering up.

At the cinema, Enid asks for four tickets to the latest werewolf thriller, and she happily claps when Xavier pays for everyone. At the snack counter it takes everything in you to not bolt or hide out in the bathroom, but you shakily manage to retrieve your own cash to pay for some nachos and a drink.

So far no one's stared or shouted and you find yourself relaxing, especially when you take a seat in the movie room and everyone is paying attention to their people that they showed up with.

Sitting between Xavier and Wednesday, you find yourself breathing a little easier.

Enid has several hot dogs balancing on her lap, Wednesday is chewing on black licorice, and you and Xavier had the same idea to get nachos. He, however, also nabbed several boxes of candy and a bucket of popcorn.

"I hope you choke on a kernel," Wednesday says as she watches him stuff handful after handful of popcorn into his mouth.

You giggle, licking the cheesy goodness from your fingertips and sipping on your drink.

And halfway through the movie, you hear Xavier actually choke. A laugh slips out of your sister before her lips are pressed closed once more, and you offer Xavier your drink. Sharing a straw doesn't bother you, so you nod in reassurance as he stares at it.

For the rest of the movie, you and Xavier share your drink. And when you run out, he quickly leaves the darkness of the room to get you a refill.

After the movie, you're standing outside in front of the cinema as Enid talks about the horrible cosmetics they used to portray a werewolf. Wednesday is tapping away on her phone before she puts it away, cutting Enid off mid rant and giving her a nod. She squeals and happily claps her hand, and you stare at them in confusion.

"There's a fair going on," Wednesday says. "Enid wants to go."

You slowly tense up. "Oh."

The bubbly werewolf's smile falls. "But if that's too much for you, we don't-"

"No. It's fine," you assure her. Your hands are back to gripping the straps of your backpack. "We can- we can go."

Enid is back to happily clapping, but Wednesday curiously studies your demeanor. And when she sees you're not about to have a meltdown, she turns and follows after her friend.

"We can always hang out front of the fair if you really don't want to go in," Xavier says. You startle, somehow having forgotten he was there. "I don't mind waiting with you."

"It's okay. Really." Your smile is shaky as you look up at him. "Just, uh, maybe don't leave me alone in there?"

"Stick by your side. Got it." Xavier grins as he offers you his elbow and you're quick to latch on. "I'll even win you the ugliest prize we can find if you're up for it."

You chuckle and let him lead the way, occasionally glancing up at him. "Christ, I forget how tall you are sometimes."

"I'm not tall, you're just really small."

"Ha. Ha."

When you eventually make it to the fair, Xavier hesitates with you as you warily glance around. Then taking a deep breath, you press on and practically make yourself flush against his side. You walk around for a bit, smiling when you see Wednesday and Enid pass you by, Enid already holding tightly to a stuffed unicorn.

As you're walking around, your eyes are drawn back to a green and black dragon that's about half your size. Xavier must notice because he decides to try his hand at basketball in order to win the prize and it takes him four tries to win it.

You don't know what it is about Xavier that makes your guard start to drop, but you find yourself smiling and laughing a bit more easier. He tries winning a panda next, but in between his dart throwing, he notices as you keep your back to the game and are staring from side to side.

You're too distracted to notice he's watching you, your arms wrapped around your dragon as you nervously chew on the bottom corner of your lip. He sighs a little dejectedly, turning around so he can see where you're staring off to. "So who's the lucky guy… or girl?"

"Excuse me?" You look up at him, brow furrowed in confusion.

"You keep glancing around." He faintly grins. "Are you waiting for someone?"

You study his features, eyes subtly widening when you notice something. Was that- was that jealousy clouding his expression? "Wednesday didn't tell you," you then mumble in awe. You for sure thought he knew why you never left your home. After all, Enid did.

"Tell me what?"

You gulp, glancing at the carnie listening in to your conversation. "Let's go for a walk. I'll fill you in." Shakily exhaling, you gesture for Xavier to follow. Side by side, he walks with you with his hands tucked away in the pockets of his coat. "A few years ago, Wednesday, Pugsley, and I were attacked by a group of normies. It… wasn't a pleasant experience for me and it's actually how I got this," you say while gesturing to the scar on your eyebrow. "They were ripping- uh, they were ripping off my clothes, so I stabbed one of them." Your breath hitches and when you chance a glance up at Xavier, you find that his jaw is clenched. "I stopped them from doing that to me, but they managed to hit me with a brick before they ran away."

You make it a few more steps before you're being tugged to a stop and then Xavier is walking to stand in front of you. Gently cupping one side of your face, you manage to hold back a flinch when his thumb brushes over your scar. "You're safe with me. You know that right?"

"I'm starting to realize that."

"That was a shit thing those normies did and I'll be damned if they do anything on my watch." When you meet his gaze, he offers you a small smile. "Now let's go win Wednesday the brightest stuffed animal we can find and make her take a picture with it."

Slowly smiling, you chuckle. "Okay."

And by the end of the night, you and Xavier have won the most terribly bright and fluffy stuffed animals, shoved them near Wednesday's face, and had Enid hurriedly snap a picture of your glaring sister.

You're smiling and skipping alongside Enid towards a waiting Lurch, laughing with all the stuffed animals crammed between your arms and bodies before crawling into the idling car.

For once, in a very long time, you've had fun and didn't worry about any normies looking in your direction.

Xavier's just got off the phone with his father when a familiar song being played on the cello draws him towards Wednesday's room. The door is open, the room is empty, but there's another door that leads out to a balcony.

Following the music, he's not surprised to find Wednesday playing Paint It Black while Thing turns the sheet music for her. Gomez, Morticia, Pugsley, and Enid are also on the balcony, staring at something down below.

"What's going on?" He asks, stepping closer to the railing.

Enid glances at him, beaming. "Take a look for yourself."

Xavier glances down, gaze falling to the gazebo that's been strung up with white fairy lights. But what draws his attention is the twirling figure inside the gazebo, adorned in a black leotard and a multicolored tutu. His jaw subtly drops. "She dances?"

"She dances." He looks over at Morticia Addams, tears glistening in her eyes. "It's been years since she's put on her slippers though."

"This week and a half with you and Enid have brought our daughter back," Gomez says. "Thank you."

Paint It Black fades into Nothing Else Matters and a majority of the white lights darken into purple. Xavier is entranced by the way you twirl on the tips of your toes, the stretch of your neck whenever your head is thrown back, and the long stretch of your leg when you twirl on the tips of your toes only on one foot.

As the music fades out, Enid breaks out into applause.

Your head snaps up at the sound of clapping, chest heaving, and your face burns when you see everyone watching you. Your little brother whistles as he claps too, but it's your parents' beaming and tearful expressions that keeps you from fleeing. Well them and Xavier who looks more than a little awed.

So before you do take your leave, you give them a little bow and then rush back inside the house.

Sitting on the floor in the middle of the sunroom, you're staring at the lockscreen on your phone. You never saw when the picture was taken, but apparently Enid had been keeping tabs on you and Xavier when you were at the fair, and now it was one of your favorite pictures.

In the picture, you and Xavier are walking side by side, one of your arms wrapped around your stuffed dragon with the other arm looped through his. You're looking up at him and he down at you, both of you smiling. But what made you grin at the picture the most was the height difference between you and Xavier. Enid was spot on when she described you two as tall and smol.

Hearing approaching footsteps, you block out your screen and climb to your feet… and speak of the devil.

Xavier walks in, smiling. "Knew I'd find you here."

"Did you now?" Walking over to a bench seat, you gesture to the space beside you. "What's going on?"

"Nothing. Just wanted to see if you were up to going into town. The cinema is showing this new cheesy horror flick and I thought you might be interested in going before my time here is up."

"Oh. Uh, yeah." Your heart starts to hammer in your rib cage. Could this be a- "Just us or are Enid and Wednesday waiting for us out front?"

"Just us?" His answer is more of a question, his cheeks tinting pink the longer you stare.

Eventually you grace him with a bashful smile. "Sure. I'd like that."

"Yeah?"

"Yeah." You laugh. "Are- are we leaving now?"

"Yeah. We can, uh, window shop and all that fun stuff before the movie."

Warmth surges through you, at the thought that Xavier wants to spend time with just you. You're not sure if this is actually a date, but you're looking forward to one on one time without a family member lurking around the corner. "Alright. Let me just go get a bag." As you stand up to leave the room, a vine falls over the entrance. But not just any vine- a vibrant green vine that hadn't been there moments before.

"Huh." Xavier huffs. "That's the first colorful plant life I've seen in this room."

Your eyes widen and you glance all around the room, taking notice how the dead plant life isn't looking quite so dull anymore. "No way," you breathe in awe. Turning towards where the fountain sits, you rush over and pick up one of the dead water lilies. Cradling it in the palms of your hand, you notice a couple of changes in the once dead flower. Feeling Xavier walk up beside you, you ask, "Remember how I said I used to be able to breathe life into this place?"

"Yeah."

"Watch." Bringing the water lily closer to your face, you let your eyes fall shut as you inhale deeply. Then slightly pursing your lips, you blow out slowly and you can feel the water lily coming back to life right there in the palm of your hands.

"Wow." Your eyes open upon Xavier's exclamation. "And here I was thinking you had a green thumb or something. Not that you actually breathe life into them."

Huffing a laugh, you blink your tears away and gently lay the water lily back in the fountain. "I haven't been able to do this for years. I guess I had a mental block and then you- you and Enid show up and I feel more at peace than I have in a while." You step up on the side of the fountain then, turning towards Xavier as you smile. "Thank you." Then leaning in, you press a kiss to his cheek.

He suddenly turns bashful, angling his face downward so his hair shields his blushing cheeks. "I never realized how small you were."

"Shut up. You're just freakishly tall."

As Xavier glances at you through his curtain of hair, you wrinkle your nose at him and then hop off the fountain siding less you do something to ruin the moment.

Like kiss him on the lips rather than the cheek.

Spending the day with Xavier alone goes so much better than you had expected, so much so that you find yourself incredibly sad the day he is set to leave. It was clear to your entire family that something had shifted between the two of you when you'd come back home, hand in hand with a never-ending blush staining both your cheeks.

Enid was more than ecstatic and Wednesday took to sharpening her short swords whenever possible.

You're in the sunroom, clipping roses with your mother when Xavier walks in. In hand, he has a covered canvas.

"I have something for you," he tells you. "But I'm sure your mom is going to take ownership of it after she sees what it is."

You smirk at him, setting down your clippers and walking over to him. Your mother isn't far behind. "Did you paint me something?"

"I did." His hands dig into his pockets after his hands are free when you take the gift from him. You stare at the covered canvas, trying to figure out what it could possibly be. "You inspired me the other night and I just had to capture the moment."

You glance up at him, eyes narrowing though you continue to smile, and pull the cover off your painting. Your mother's delighted gasp is what makes you glance down and you're struck speechless.

The painting… is of you.

Specifically you dancing in the gazebo with the only color in the painting being that of your tutu.

"Xavier, this is…" You trail off, staring in awe. A moment passes and he brings the painting to life. Your mother starts to clap, even more delighted now as the miniature version of you dances away. "This is amazing. Thank you."

"I must show your father. This is just splendid." Your mother takes the painting, but not before gently grazing her nails along Xavier's jaw and smiling at him. "Thank you, young Mr. Thorpe."

"Y-You're welcome, Mrs. Addams."

Your mother sighs wistfully before glancing at the painting and then leaves the two of you alone. As soon as she's out of your sight, your hands are reaching for the lapels of Xavier's coat, his hands are clinging to your waist, and he's leaning down to meet you in a kiss.

You giggle when his hair falls forward to tickle your face and it makes Xavier smile.

"We really should have started this sooner," he says as he hesitantly straightens himself out. "I'm gonna miss you while I'm at Nevermore."

"What if… what if you didn't have to miss me?" You ask, your hands smoothing down the wrinkles you'd made on his coat.

"What?"

"What if I came to Nevermore?" He's quiet a little too long for your liking and you start to feel like maybe you read too much into whatever you two were. "Or not. I just thought-"

"Are you kidding me?" You barely manage to hold back a wince and Xavier's sudden laugh has you wanting to crawl into a hole. But when you chance a glance up at him, his expression is not what you were expecting. He's actually excited! "You're going to Nevermore?!"

You shrug, grinning sheepishly. "Mom's been talking to Principal Weems. I have a meeting with her in a couple of days to see whether or not I'll be a good fit."

"Hell yes." His smile is boyish and you can't help but giggle. "You'll make it in. I know it."

"I hope so. I love my parents, but they're not the greatest of teachers."

"You're gonna love it. I can introduce you to my friends and show you all the cool hang out spots. We can-"

"Xavier. Xavier!" You laugh, trying to talk over his excitement. "We don't even know if I'll get in."

"I'm telling you, you will. And if Principal Weems denies you, I'm pretty sure Wednesday will bug her until she grants you a place at the school."

"Oh. I forgot what going to school with a sibling was like." This time, you do wince. "People are going to dread another Addams roaming the halls, aren't they?"

"Some will." He grins. "But once they get to know you, they'll grow to like you."

You sigh but end up shaking your head in amusement. "If I do get in, how shocked do you think everyone will be if Wednesday's sister shows up dressed like Enid?"

"You'll confuse the hell out of everyone. Do it."

"I will. Now come on. We got away with one kiss. I have a feeling if another happens, a dagger will whiz by out of thin air."

"Xavier." The boy in question flinches as your sister pops up out of nowhere. "Your ride's here. Stop sucking my sister's face and go home. You'll see her soon enough."

He rolls his eyes, even as you laugh in the face of your sister's glare. "Always a pleasant encounter, Wednesday."

"Not really."

He huffs and glances back down at you, his gaze falling to your lips. But before he can get carried away, Wednesday's grunting and dragging him away. "Okay. Okay!" He laughs.

"You're gross. I never should have introduced you two."

You follow after them, trailing behind until you're standing under the archway of your front door. Wednesday pushes him down the steps and he walks to the car that Lurch is putting his suitcases in. He offers you one last look, one last smile, and one last wave before climbing into the vehicle his father had sent for him.

Once the car drives out of the gate, Wednesday turns towards you. "Are you happy?"

"Uh, yes?"

She quietly groans. "And here I was preparing Enid to hide a body in the family cemetery. She'll be let down that all that studying was for naught."

You bark out a laugh. "Stop corrupting Enid, Wednesday."

"Never." Her lips twitch in amusement. "Now come on. Let's go visit Principal Weems."

"But my interview is still a couple days away."

"So? She needs to be kept on her toes. She'll have to grow used to having two Addams' in her school."

"If you say so."

"I do."

#xavier thorpe x reader #xavier thorpe imagine #xavier thorpe fanfiction #wednesday imagine #wednesday fanfiction #xavier thorpe #wednesday addams #enid sinclair #wednesday #wednesday on netflix

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theemporium · 3 months

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click 'here' to unlock the other boyfriends!

You had thought you were perfectly content with love being expressed silently until you met Nico Hischier.

For you, love and silence had always been interchangeable throughout your entire life. You weren’t sure when it clicked, when the realisation had been set in stone in your head and never to be argued with. You just knew that silence usually meant good things, that it meant positive feelings. At least, you liked to assume.

When it came to your parents, the silence meant there was no scolding or nitpicking. They were never shy at the way they pointed out your flaws, your mistakes, your errors. It was hidden under concerns and wishes for you to thrive, but the pressure just felt as suffocating and overbearing as them. The silence was a relief from the constant remarks.

In school, it was like the teachers and professors just expected you to do well. They saw a bright child, so the second the grades started to matter, the assumption was made that you would just thrive. That pressure returned, and you hated the disappointing and disapproving talks you would get if you did badly. Once again, the silence was a relief, it meant they left you alone and that was what you wanted.

It followed as the same in almost every aspect in your life: in your friendships, in your relationships, in your careers, in your achievements. Silence had become so intertwined with love, success and praise in your life that you knew nothing but.

Until Nico Hischier.

Maybe it was the captain in him, or maybe it was just the kind of guy Nico was. It was almost comical to think back upon the early stages of your relationship, when everything was so new and his words left you overwhelmed—but in a good way, in a way you didn’t think was possible.

“You didn’t have to wake up with me,” Nico said as he wandered into the kitchen.

Unlike you who was still in your pyjamas, he was dressed in some sweatpants and a hoodie—the Devils logo and his number standing out on both. His gym bag was dropped at his feet before he wandered over to where you stood by the stove.

It was early. Dreadfully early, in fact. And despite every cell in your body screaming for you to stay in your warm, cosy bed when Nico’s alarm blared for his early morning practice, you wanted to do a little something for him for once.

“I wanted to make you a proper breakfast,” you shrugged, letting out a soft sigh as he wound his arms around your waist, his chest pressed into your back as the warmth of him washed over you. “An apple and a protein shake isn’t enough.”

“It’s worked alright so far,” Nico grumbled, his head dropped to your shoulder as he watched you cook. “But thank you. You’re amazing, schätzi.”

You snorted. “You mean having a proper breakfast is amazing.”

“No,” he said, his voice firm but sincere. “I mean you are amazing. You’re the best thing that has ever happened to me.”

And maybe there was still a part of you that wasn’t used to Nico’s constant praise and affection. You could do hugs and kind acts and thoughtful gifts but, fuck, the words really got to you.

It just baffled you how easily the words could pass his lips. It came so naturally to him, so fucking easily that it made you question how you went your whole life having people struggle to even give you basic appreciation but this boy seemed to be able to praise you for something as simple as making him a meal. But it went beyond that.

Nico did it with everything.

You look gorgeous, baby, that dress was made for you.

Fuck, schätzi, doing so good f’me. Just like that.

I’m so proud of you.

You’re doing the best you can, baby, you’re so strong.

He wasn’t shy about his appreciation for you. He showed his love in so many different ways that made him the absolute perfect boyfriend, but the words that left his lips were the most consistent and—though you didn’t have the courage to say it yet—your favourite.

“You’re a sap in the mornings,” you commented, because whilst you were used to hearing them, it would still take time to fully accept them and not deflect instantly.

He knew that. If anything, he thought it was adorable. It prompted him to do it more often just to see how flushed you got, just to see the way you were somehow caught off-guard every single time.

“Maybe you should wake up with me more often,” Nico retorted, swaying your bodies together in the chilly kitchen. “I could use a shower buddy.”

You snorted. “You would never make it to practise on time.”

“That is a sacrifice I’m willing to make,” Nico shrugged, but you could hear the grin in his voice even if you couldn’t see it.

“You’re gonna set a bad influence, captain,” you teased, shaking your head.

Nico let out a low groan. “Don’t start calling me captain, I have to leave in fifteen.”

“Think of it as motivation to do well,” you countered as you plated up your breakfasts and lightly nudged him so he would allow you to place them on the breakfast bar. “I’ll be in bed waiting for you.”

Nico shot you a look. “You’re a temptress.”

You grinned back.

“A gorgeous, sexy temptress that I can’t wait to come back home too,” Nico continued, pleased at the way your face flushed in response.

“Dick,” you grumbled but you happily accepted the kiss he placed on your cheek as he thanked you for the breakfast.

And, much to his delight, you were in bed waiting for him after he had come home from practice, eager to climb in with you.

#nico hischier #nhl #new jersey devils #nico hischier x reader #nico hischier x you #nico hischier x y/n #nico hischier fic #nico hischier one shot #nhl x reader #nhl x you #nhl x y/n #nhl fic #nhl one shot

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roses-r-rosie3 · 3 months

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Fantasize

Yandere!Golden Boy!OC x M!Reader

Warnings: Yandre (Obvi), Murder, stalking, Malakai is a bit delulu, light nsfw, reader is bisexual

Oc Name: Malakai Mazurek (Top Left)

Summary: Malakai was perfect in every way, he had no flaws. He was the golden boy of the campus, and then you arrived. Malakai was mesmerized he couldn’t keep his eyes off of you, so he starts to do what any psychopath normal would do and starts to stalk you! He soon finds out that you are already in a relationship and that doesn’t make him happy. So instead of moving on, he decides to… get rid of her

Quote: “This is what happens to filthy sluts when they get in my way”

✁ - - - - - - - - - - - - - - - - - - - - - - - - - - - - - - -

Malakai was the definition of a ‘Golden Boy’. I mean he was literally perfect! Perfect grades, perfect attendance, perfect social life, perfect personality, everything about him was just perfect! He had no flaws! It was a surprise to everyone on campus when they found out he wasn’t in a relationship.

But the truth was, he wasn’t really interested in a relationship, he would’ve much rather focus on his schoolwork and on graduating. Well at least, he used to. Ever since you joined the college campus, Malakai couldn’t keep his eyes off of you. He would try to talk to you, but he would get too nervous and just end up following you like some lost puppy.

From then on, Malakai’s whole life revolved around what you did. You were about to be late to class? Not to worry! He would gently knock on your window to wake you up before running away. A professor was getting on your nerves? He’s already on it! Next thing you knew, the professor has mysteriously gone missing and your grades start to go up again!

Of course with all that work and devotion came some consequences. Malakai’s own grades were starting to plummet, he would almost never show up to class, and he would constantly ditch his friends because he was “too tired”. You were his only goal in life from now on. School? Pshh! Who cares about school when you can have a lover!

Eventually, after all the stalking and killing Malakai finally built up the courage and finally tried to interact with you for the first time! It was during a class that you shared with him, and he decided to sit next to you. As the professor was talking, all Malakai could think about was you. He could smell your cologne lingering around his nostrils and your sharp but soft eyes looking at your notebook and taking notes on what the professor was teaching.

But while Malakai was too busy oogling you, he hadn’t realized how much time went by and class was already halfway over! He was stressing internally. He had to think of an excuse to talk to you and quick! Suddenly he thought of an idea.

He gently tapped your shoulders and you looked at him with a soft friendly gaze. He felt butterflies in his stomach at this point and he was panicking, trying to think of something to say.

‘Oh my god! Oh my god! Oh my god! Oh my god! He’s actually looking at me! He’s so fucking cute!!! I could just kiss him right now!!’

“I-I-uh do y-you have a pencil you-I mean I can borrow” Malakai stuttered.

“Yeah sure” you smiled before reaching in your bag to grab a pencil.

‘His smile is so perfect!! Everything about him so perfect!! I bet our kids would look perfect too!’

You handed him the pencil politely before going back to your work. But Malakai on the other hand, he was on the brink of hyperventilating. He was holding YOUR pencil in his hand right now!! Oh god.. the things he wanted to do with your pencil was insane..

Before he knew it, the class was already over. Which meant that he had to return your pencil back to you. He truly didn’t want to but he had to give you a good impression of himself. So he tapped your shoulder once again.

“H-here’s your uh- pencil” Malakai blushed.

“Oh it’s fine you can keep it” you said before you were about to get up and leave.

Something in Malakai was telling him to do more. Ask to be your friend! Maybe even ask to be your boyfriend! But he to play it safe.

“H-hey, d-do you maybe wanna be fr-friends? It’s totally okay if you don’t want to be friends!” Malakai asked.

“Sure, can you just give me your number?” you smiled.

He felt like his heart was doing jumping jacks right now. You?! Asking for his number?! He was going to faint! But Malakai quickly put his phone number and name into your phone.

“Malakai, that’s a cool name” you said.

OH MY GOD! OH MY GOD! YOU SAID HIS NAME WAS COOL!!! This was the best day of his life!! You complimented him!!

“T-thanks, what’s yours?” Malakai asked, acting as if he didn’t already know what your name was.

“My name is y/n, guess I’ll see you around Malakai” you winked before walking out of the classroom.

Malakai stood there in shock. Did you just let him keep your pencil and you gave him your number?!??! Malakai knew he had to cherish this pencil forever, so he rushed back to his dorm and into his room where he put the pencil in a glass case before putting it on his shelf. Oh and he didn’t forget about your phone number, he texted you immediately. Starting a conversation with you and getting to know you better.

From then on, he would constantly sneak into your dorm room and steal little stuff that you had lying around your desk. He even started a shrine dedicated to all of your stuff! Your cologne (that he sprays on his pillows everyday), a used piece of tissue paper, your underwear, your water bottle, and basically just anything that you owned.

Malakai was convinced you were in love with him too. I mean what type of person would just give someone a pencil and their number! You were definitely in love with him! So he decided to follow you around even more. Which caused his attendance and grades to plummet even further to the point where he could get kicked out of the school he worked so hard to get into. But who cares! You love him! And he loves you!

His attendance got so bad that the dean of the campus emailed him, asking if they could meet to talk about his sudden change in attitude. As much as he just wanted to stalk follow you for the day, he knew that if he got expelled he wouldn’t be able to see you again, so he begrudgingly went to the meeting.

“Hi Malakai, I think we both know why you’re here. Your grades and attendance used to be perfect, but I’ve been noticing that as of recently you have really been showing up to class and I’m starting to get concerned…”

Malakai didn’t even pay attention after that, only nodding his head as he pretended to listen. The only thing he was thinking was what you were doing right now. Were you thinking about him like he thinks about you? Were you…

“Do you understand Mr. Mazurek?” The dean asked.

“Yes” Malakai nodded.

“You may go” The dean said.

Malakai left quickly, and headed towards your dorm. He couldn’t wait to see you again! Oh after the day he’s had all he wanted to do was to see you. To smell you, to look at you, to-

Suddenly he started hearing some noises, that sounded like groaning/moaning coming from your dorm. Malakai immediately got worried, was someone hurting you?! Did something happen?! When he finally arrived to your window, what he saw broke his heart.

He saw you lying on your bed, naked as your hands gripping onto the girl’s hips, rolling your eyes to the back of your head as she rode your cock. What was that filthy slut doing with you?! That should be him! Not whoever that bitch was!

Malakai stormed off, running away back to his dorm with tears in his eyes. How could you do this to him?! As soon as he got back to his dorm, he immediately started looking into who that person was. After doing some research, he found out that she was your current girlfriend. Suddenly his anger towards you, turned to her.

How dare she steal you from him! How dare she try to convince you that she belonged to you! No! He belonged with you! Not whoever that bitch was! You know what! She probably blackmailed you into dating her so that she could keep you from him! Not to worry though! He’ll make sure that you were free from them!

Malakai spent the whole night trying to find out where they lived, only to find out that they were your roommate. All he needed to do was dig up enough information about this partner/roommate. It turns out that her name was Julia, what a ugly name (no offense to the girls named Julia out there who are reading this rn), but most important, he found out that she was a bit forgetful.

Jackpot, this would be easier than he thought! All he needed to do was sneak in and kill her! So later that night, he got all the supplies he needed to make your soon to be ex-lover “disappear”.

It was currently 3am and nobody on campus was awake. So it was his time to strike! He brought his knife and put on gloves before heading off. When he arrived, he tested to see if her window was open, which it was.

‘Of course that slut doesn’t lock her window, why would he even want to be with her’

He quietly opened the window and snuck in. He looked at the sleeping girl before walking closer with his knife.

“This is what happens to filthy sluts when they get in my way” he whispered to her before plunging his knife into her.

Malakai got some sort of thrill from this. So he kept stabbing and stabbing, letting out all his anger on the poor girl. Her blood started soaking the bed and splattering everywhere. After he was finished, the girls whole chest was covered with stab wounds and his face and clothes were stained with her blood.

The next day, you woke up and something in your dorm was starting to smell bad. You shrugged it off and thought that maybe your girlfriend just forgot to take out the trash, and you started to get ready. While you were making breakfast, you knocked on her door to ask her if she wanted anything.

“Hey, Julia, I made us some breakfast if you want some” you said.

But there was no response. Maybe she was still asleep. So you knocked again. But still, no response. Did you make her mad or something?

“Julia, whatever I did, I’m sorry. But can you come out now, the breakfast is getting cold” you apologized.

Still no response. You were starting to get worried.

“I’m coming in” you said before opening the door.

You let out a blood curdling scream. You saw Julia’s dead body on her bed, blood was everywhere, on the walls, her bed, the floor, everything. You looked up above her bed frame to see a chilling message used with her blood.

‘U + Me 4 Ever’

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rosie-writings · 2 months

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You’ve Got my Body, Flesh, and Bone Part One

Summary: You didn’t think you would let it go this far, but alcohol always gives you the bite to challenge Colby until you’re both faced with the things that keep you from being together.

Warnings: Colby x Reader smut, Angst, Slow Burn, Dom/Sub dynamic, Best Friends to Lovers, slight Predator/Prey kink, Overstimulation, Bondage, Overstimulation, slight Subspace

Words: 23.4k

No Y/N Used

Title is from ‘The Summoning’ by Sleep Token

Part Two

Don’t get me wrong, I loved my friends to death and back and then some, but they could be real fucking idiots sometimes.

Most of the time.

Perhaps I simply had a more conservative outlook on the dating culture in LA, or maybe I was traumatized enough where my hopeless romantic naive middle school girl heart turned into an all or nothing brittle young adult woman heart. Nothing was wrong with that, I didn’t think, until I moved to LA to live closer to my new friends.

I met them after my YouTube and Instagram exploded, which I know I said I would never do, but they truly were the most amazing people I met.

My friendship with Sam and Colby didn’t end after they invited me and one of my friends to film a video with them. I knew who they were; we interacted on social media plenty of times but never communicated privately. I also was keen on truly finding out more about the spiritual realm, so when I followed them into that haunted mansion, there was no room for bullshit.

I guess they respected that because not even 24 hours later, Colby was asking for my number.

Maybe I was an idiot and gave it to him.

I genuinely thought it was purely so we could have an easier time than clogged dm’s to collaborate again. And it was. We strictly talked about spirituality and paranormal activity for six months. I always asked about their investigations and he always enthusiastically responded.

I enjoyed it. I really enjoyed it.

The messages developed into something else, something with seemingly less purpose, in the autumn. I remember it being mid October when Colby sent a photo of himself. It looked like any other Snapchat or Instagram story he would post, but then I looked on his social media and realized that this photo was taken just for me.

Which was fine; I didn’t think twice about it. In fact, I felt excited because he trusted me enough to ask about the new merch sample they received. Of course it looked good and there were now flaws to pick out. I picked out a couple to make sure he stayed humble. Of course they were lies.

I learned a month before that they had private socials for their friends only. And, oh. The amount of tomfoolery that went on behind that firewall was better than the latest show I binged. For one, I didn’t realize that Colby saw a different girl basically every night. At least I think they were different girls.

At heart, I’m 100 percent a girl’s girl and I will always see the value in every girl but goddamn; I didn’t realize how easy it was to make yourself look exactly like someone else. I mean, down to the exact shade of brunette hair, body type, and sometimes eye color? It felt like I was the delusional one and tripping out on his new girlfriend. That wasn’t what it was though. A different girl was tagged everytime.

The boys weren’t unfamiliar with posting edgier photos whether it be in the middle of an abandoned place that could crumble and kill them before they thought to react, or it be them posing with minimal clothing or some kind of flirtatious caption in the description. Those weren’t bad things, but they were new to me, and honestly, it kind of melted down the anxiety I built in my head about posting new photos on Instagram. Suddenly it didn’t feel like I had to be perfect and get the perfect shot anymore; a lot of it was shock factor.

Which the boys did exceptionally well.

My friends bulldozed their way through the beginning of 2024. It was entertaining, to say the least, but when I saw photos of their New Year’s party, I was taken back by how minimal they turned out. I came across four photos. A girl kissed Sam at midnight, Colby’s arm was around a girl’s waist, the two of them with probably nine other people in a cute group shot, and the last one was them outside the club the party was at—darkened city streets and palm trees that glistened with New Year’s sparkles and confetti were behind them—and I loved those photos. All of them.

But they weren’t the full picture. Definitely not the full picture.

I vividly remember turning the corner with friends into one of the secluded cut outs of lounge space. My best friend and I tried to find more friends and, well, we found them. Firstly, I would admit that the music was so loud I felt the bass in my bones, so maybe that had something to play. I also was in the double digits of how many combined drinks and shots I had, so there was that as well.

But when we turned the corner, I remember the same girl who kissed Sam at midnight was on his lap kissing him again, only this time she fully grinded on him and he didn’t even raise a hand to stop.

Which, okay, to be fair, whatever I don’t care. What caught me off guard was the complete lack of care from everyone else as well. I’m not sure if I have the confidence to practically have sex in a semi-public space with all my friends around me, but whatever.

What bothered me more, somehow, was the way Colby’s hands wouldn’t leave that girl’s skin—the same one he kissed at midnight—and I didn’t know why. Maybe I did, but it was more of a complete annoyance than anything. Maybe some disapproval as well.

He was with someone different just the night before—it was on his Instagram story—and he hooked up with the same girl multiple times during the trip we all took during Christmas. At least he was with her for an entire week rather than one day.

It wasn’t my business though, so naturally, I didn’t give a fuck nor did I say a word. It was so easy to behave like it didn’t affect me in any way or leave a bad taste in my mouth, because it didn’t.

”Hey!” I instantly broke into a smile when Tara met us halfway from the couches and drinks and friends and confetti and the making out— “Where have you guys been?”

”We had drinks and kind of got lost dancing with people,” I laughed. It was the truth and considering the flush in our cheeks and the more unkempt pieces of hair down our backs, Tara didn’t question it. Her hand linked with mine and she dragged us to the left side of the room; black leather couches lined in a semicircle.

And that was when the night truly began.

It also finished there when one of us passed out; I don’t remember who but I swear it wasn’t me.

My night finished when I emptied my guts on the street outside. I think Tara’s hands were in my hair and Colby’s voice was quiet and close to me. I’m pretty sure the sun was rising when we stepped foot in that Uber.

So that was as far as my friendship with Sam and Colby had gone. They were fantastic at their jobs, cared deeply about their work, and cared even more about the supernatural and what’s beyond, and they partied hard.

It was true. I scanned over the last few messages between us. I didn’t mean to leave Colby on read. Something sprouted in me from that moment. I couldn’t fully comprehend what it was. Maybe it was the abrasiveness of the photo, or maybe it was because I didn’t anticipate Colby ever crossing that imaginary boundary. This photo didn’t just cross it, he shot a hundred yards past and then some.

That look in his eyes—the subtle desperation in his text—something, somewhere, did it for me.

It was completely unsolicited as well. Well, unwarranted at least. Once I saw the photo it was solicited in every way imaginable. I didn’t understand where those intense feelings came from. It was intangible.

My stomach soured inside of me. It had me spiraling. Every look, every touch; Colby hardcore gave himself away. It wasn’t that I couldn’t handle it. It wasn’t that I didn’t want it, no, not even that.

It was the fact that I loved it.

That caught me off guard. That nearly scared me.

It was no secret that a while ago, before we even interacted on social media, Colby drunkenly uncovered some too-personal details on the internet. And of course the internet ran wild with them. It kind of became part of his persona which he bravely embraced—which I admired because if I were in his situation, I would coil up and die—and it surpassed the internet’s perception of him as well.

But the underlying tone of his photo, of his text, completely betrayed that persona I was familiar with.

So I waited.

And waited.

I didn’t mean to leave him on read before the photo, but after he sent it, I left him on read with purpose in order to see what came of it. If he was willing to send that one desperate photo after an accidental ignoring, what would he do if it was deliberate?

It wasn’t very dominant of him to lace his photos and matching words with yearning like that.

I groaned as I rolled over in my chilling duvet. My arms stretched above me and my vision darkened. Damn right it was 6am, and I innocently woke up and couldn’t go back to sleep so I checked my phone. It still lodged in my stretched hand.

It buzzed again.

Unfortunately, he and I both knew that he was right.

I rolled out of bed and my legs tangled in the slick white sheets.

I haphazardly made my way into my en suite and flicked on the light. The eye bags were out to say hello this morning, which checked out. I was nearly 27; why the hell did I allow a grown man to get me out of bed to go outside before my body willed.

”Jesus Christ,” I gasped at his behavior. So, naturally, I snapped a photo of myself in the mirror.

‘Better?’ I typed and hit send with trembling hands. He didn’t respond.

My heart pounded.

Perhaps I shouldn’t have sent that.

If he spits out his own medicine then he shouldn’t have offered it to me.

With shaking hands, I got myself ready as requested.

It hadn’t always been like this even though it felt so.

Our relationship evolved and with every text, it dramatically developed into something more than a professional one. Like a friendship, at the very least, and now here I was finding myself lacing my shoes for this man before seven am to go to some… place.

Eight days ago we came back from a long trip of filming content for their channel.

Five days ago Sam asked us to go pick up shit for this party that was forgotten in transit or something. It was the first time we were alone together, and while the task was simple and mundane, it was fun.

Fun enough for me to say yes to him all the time apparently, because four days ago, Colby asked me to come to a photo shoot for their next merch launch.

Three days ago, Sam, Colby and I went out with Tara, Jake and Johnnie and took photos afterward.

Two days ago we partied hard with the gang again.

And yesterday, well, yesterday I went to Sam and Colby’s house for no reason.

We had breakfast, relaxed for once, and did nothing.

Nothing was so entirely great.

Now when I left my apartment that morning, he was already there waiting for me. We didn’t live close enough to walk, but maybe two exits at most from each other.

“Wow you look so happy to see the sun,” Colby remarked. My squinted eyes glared back at him. I forgot to change my hair from its bed head state in any way. A piece of it dangled in front of my eye bags. He only laughed back at me.

“I’m here. I didn’t say I would be happy about it.”

”Don’t worry, you will be soon.” I didn’t respond because I didn’t want to get too snappy. I knew I was joking, but the lack of caffeine and over abundance of morning light did not fare well in me.

”Here is this,” he said before he even gave me a thick enough pause to reply. I looked over and he pulled an energy drink from behind my chair. It was cold. “Palatable offering, I hope.”

”It is,” I laughed and snapped it open.

For an early morning, it was fairly a quick drive on the freeway to this mystery location.

”We’re flying to Australia soon.”

”Oh really?” I gasped and looked over at him. The sun brightened this side of his face. ”Damn.”

”Yeah, we’ve put it off for so long and it’s finally happening. We’re so excited.”

”I bet. Wait, when are you leaving?”

”Six days.”

”That is really soon.” His eyes widened with a sigh.

”Yeah.”

”What, unprepared?”

”As much as we should be prepared already considering how long we’ve wanted to go, yes. Very much so unprepared. We’ve been running around like crazy trying to get things in order at any time we can.”

”So this morning?” He shook his head. I hadn’t looked away from him for a second as we spoke. He kept his eyes on the road.

”How dare I take a tiny break for myself.”

”Naturally you invite me then?”

”I suppose.” By the quiet tone of his voice, I didn’t push. I didn’t prod or step across a line.

I don’t think I even stepped on it. I ran away from it.

”DId Tara mention that we’re going to New York and staying there until Tana and Brooke get there while on tour?”

”Oh shit, no she didn’t. Wait, she did go on their podcast recently.”

”Yeah. Two weeks ago she did. I went with her and we talked for so long. We literally canceled our next plans and decided that we would catch up again in New York when they got there. I think they have a good five days off or something to stay there a week.”

”Oh sweet, when are you leaving?”

”March second.”

”Oh shit, that’s the day we get back from Australia.”

”Oh really?”

There was silence.

“And when do you get back?”

”The plan is to be back by March 12th but we’ll see if that happens.” For the first time since he gave me the drink, he stole a glance from me.

”You’ll see?”

”Tara was talking about going to uh—God I forgot, a specific place, though, for spring break with some other girls too. I think we may be back to re-pack and then head there.”

”Oh okay, okay.” My stomach swarmed with butterflies. I couldn’t pinpoint why. I was overly excited for our trips; it had been a while since I went anywhere for a break and to spend time with myself and the girls, and myself and the girls only.

We parked.

It was a bit farther than I anticipated, but there were less people and mainly lone hikers who risked more of a challenge in the early morning. I didn’t mind. I was simply here for the ride and grateful that I could keep up with Colby.

”Sam and I came here a while ago because we saw it and were curious. It’s a really nice place for photos and to walk in silence.”

”Oh silence. I love that.”

”Yeah,” he laughed. “I know.”

So we walked in silence.

The hills rolled and seemed to touch the skies in some places. Even in the winter chill, the sun warmed my face and within ten minutes both of our hoodies came off. Dust emitted from the ground but stayed. It was dry as hell and not as windy as usual so we were covered in it.

“This way,” he said and we veered to the left up a steeper route of white rock. Thistles of cacti and various plants I was afraid to touch nipped at our ankles as we calculated our steps on the small jut outs lodged in the hill.

Then, near the top and to the right, Colby reached a eight to twelve foot—I wasn’t quite sure—plateau. It wasn’t a long drop to our ground, per say, but the sun’s light was cut from where I stood. I basked in the shade as Colby climbed up with his long ass nimble legs.

”Here,” he said and his hand reached to mine. I climbed the first few feet of rocks before taking his hand.

Maybe I should not have been as enthusiastic to hold his rough dirty hand if even for a few split moments.

Once on top, there was another few yards of elevation until we reached the peak that I supposed he and Sam found before. They weren’t wrong. This portion of the hill was fairly tall compared to the rest, and while we stood in the dusty rocks of the peak, the other side was a grassy downslope that fell straight towards the valley from which we came. Morning light streaked across the city in pinks and oranges while the tips of buildings and hills on the other side of the city reflected mature midday sun.

Maybe getting out of bed this morning wasn’t all that bad.

“Oh my god, you were right. This is a fantastic place.”

”See?” He replied happily. “And there’s really no one who comes out this far.”

”I know. Maybe we should come back for photos since you left me out the first time.”

”Well when we do come back for photos, you will have been here the same amount we have so it’s like we didn’t leave you out.”

”What are you talking about? You’re here now.”

”Well… It’s fine. We’ll still come back.”

More silence.

I sat down first. Colby sat next to me and leaned back on his hands.

“Right that way,” Colby started as he pointed quite to the right of us; east. “Sam and I filmed this one video. I don’t think we can see the plateau very well from here, but it was the one where this guy in a cloak threw a cross over us and into the valley.”

”Oh shit, wait,” I gasped. “I remember that.”

”Yeah,” he scoffed. “Sometimes I think about all the weird stuff that happens at night only for the morning to feel so peaceful.”

“It’s almost as if your mind plays tricks on you.” He gave me a look.

”Wow, I guess Sam and I and also the camera hallucinated that damn cross.”

”Oh my god,” I laughed. “No but, he threw that thing damn far.”

”I know! It was even crazier in person because it wasn’t light when we picked it up.” I looked back to the valley. The white rocks descended into purples and blues where a few highways entered and exited.

”Do you think he’s the reason you got all scratched up?”

”Oh god, I have no idea.”

”Or do you think whatever it is just stays here?” Colby shrugged but kept his gaze across the sea of hills. I could tell; he tried to identify the property they were on but couldn’t.

”I don’t know. If it does, it sure isn’t in charge of the morning, is it?”

”No.” My voice was quiet.

My heart pounded.

When would it get a rest?

I opened my mouth before I thought about it.

”Why didn’t you bring Sam?” My seriousness was probably enough to tell him that I meant bringing him in this moment instead. He shook his head before he spoke.

”I didn’t—It’s not that I didn’t bring him. I just wanted you to come.”

”Oh. I see.”

“You said yes,” he laughed.

”Maybe I just like doing nothing with you. All we do it work and run around like crazy all the time.”

”That’s true.”

Another pause.

”This weekend was really nice though,” I admitted. He looked at me. I didn’t look back.

”It was, I think.”

”Because yeah we probably got too fucked up on Friday and Saturday nights, but just relaxing and not doing anything with you guys is actually nice.”

”You say that as if you expected it to be awful.” I smiled and shot him a look.

“No I don’t. I just mean that it’s nice to see you—all of you—not stressed until you want to drink yourself to death.” Colby sighed.

”No, you’re right.”

”I know I’m right.”

”Yeah, and humble.”

“Shut up,” I laughed and shoved his arm slightly. It gave out and he caught himself.

When we straightened ourselves and leaned back like we were, his hand accidentally landed close to mine. It didn’t touch me, but I felt the warmth between us.

This silence was still. Brutally, peacefully, still.

My tongue clamped to the roof of my mouth. I heard my heartbeat in my ears. As I tried to find something within the horizon to take interest in, the corner of my eye caught the expression on his face. He too looked forward, eyebrows pressed serious, and lips parted.

I would think he was lost in thought and had been for a while now.

As I looked at him slowly, his finger ever so slightly lifted and came over mine. I don’t think it covered but half of my finger, and I wasn’t sure if he touched it all that much. But it was there and I waited for the weight of it.

”Let’s get up. You haven’t posted on Instagram in, what? Three months? Why should we wait to take pictures later?”

”Bitch,” I gasped and sat forward. He looked at me. His eyes were still thoughtful and dark. But his mouth lifted to a smile. “I look like shit.”

”No you don’t.”

I left it at that.

A handful of photos—for both of our feeds—later, and we coasted down the hill twice as fast as we came up. My ankles were almost too weak to handle it from the photo session. I tensed my entire body to shake the thoughts away. My hands were so slick by the time it was my turn to snap photos of him that I thought I would drop his phone. I held my breath the second his shirt came up and off his body. I only really stared at the screen.

There was something about that moment that seemed too close, too serious, for me to look at him not through a screen.

It wasn’t that I hadn’t seen him half dressed before; it was basically his everyday wear. For some reason though, out by ourselves alone in the valley made it seem ten times more intimate. I’ve been alone with him in his bedroom when he hardly wore clothes, I’ve fallen asleep next to him on flights, in beds, on sofas.

It wasn’t like this. My eyes couldn’t retreat from the areas the sun reflected on his skin.

When we got in the car, suddenly it was stuffy and hot, and we tossed our clothes to the backseat before Colby turned the A/C on high.

”Jesus Christ, it’s February!” He shouted. I laughed and held onto my drink. Of course it was flat and not cold anymore but it was something for my aching throat.

I forced myself to look forward even as his hand subconsciously met the back of my chair when he began to back from the parking space. Even with the over abundance of cameras on this damn car, he still never used them.

“Aw shit,” Colby laughed as he looked at his phone.

”What?”

”Sam asked where the fuck I was.”

”Oh my god—“

”And then just asked to grab food on the way back.”

”Let’s get food then.”

I spent the rest of the day with them.

When I walked into their spare bathroom downstairs, I paused as I turned on the lights.

My hair was a mess, my tan popped against the dark sports bra that caked with dust, and in the reflection were sun dazed eyes. Then I looked to the counter and the room spun.

Half of my make up and products I used to get ready sprawled across the granite counter. I forgot that on Saturday night I got ready here before we went out, and Tara sat in the bathtub eating her dinner and entertained me while I did so. My shampoo, conditioner, and body wash were in the shower. I looked back at myself in the mirror.

My towel hung behind me.

”Come on!”

“I’m hurrying!”

”Let’s go!”

”Fucking trying, bitch!”

”You’re walking!”

The door slammed.

”Impatient animals, Jesus fuck,” Tara sighed. She turned back to me. I backed away from the mirror.

“Wait we look hot let me—“ And Tara grabbed her phone and snapped mirrors selfies with the both of us before we exited the bathroom.

”Just put your shoes on in the car or else Sam will leave us here,” I told Tara. My shoes were also in my hand.

”Right, right,” she grumbled. “Coming.” I stood at the front door and waited for her. I scowled at the raging black clouds in the sky. There was no way we would make it into the studio before the storm began. “Surprisingly my ex-boyfriend would never treat me like this,” she grumbled as she hopped past me. I scoffed a laugh.

”Yeah because he knew he’d get his ass beat.”

”I mean you’re not wrong.”

We hopped in the back seats of Sam’s car, and that was how we started the last night we all had together before over a month of separate travels.

To be fair, we were running over 30 minutes behind to get the photoshoot we should have been ultra prepared for. We planned it nearly six days ago after Sam complained about not being a part of our morning photoshoot in the hills. Tara came along because, obviously.

Bickering was the only way for us to relieve the stress of not getting into the car as soon as we needed.

”If I find another one of these in the car, I’m fucking throwing it away,” Colby spat and chunked whatever tube of makeup into the bag Sam held.

”Excuse me, that was mine—“

”Was,” Colby cut me off with a little too much emphasis.

”I’m pretty sure they stopped making those—“

”God fucking thank you then. Now I don’t have to throw one away everytime I climb back here to get shit.”

”You throw them away?” I cried. Colby glared at me from where he leaned inside the trunk of his car.

“Yeah? They would end up crawling back over here anyway.” I rolled my eyes at the muted pitch of his voice.

We stood at the back of the car for all but ten seconds while we each grabbed different things for the photoshoot and the podcast we were about to film and within those ten seconds, the angry clouds decided it was a good time to rain down on us.

As Colby slammed the back shut, I followed Tara straight for the door to the back of the studio. She already was safe under the patio cover.

The tension in the air wasn’t funny or a joke anymore.

I repeated the expression I saw on Sam’s face in my head when I whirled around and followed Tara. He wasn’t messing around anymore. He didn’t look at me and only stared at Colby waiting for his next command.

Needless to say, it never came.

Colby didn’t say another word until we were on the set.

It had been a few minutes. We caught our breaths while our hair and makeup were freshened. Tara and I gossiped between ourselves to calm down and keep ourselves occupied.

And then it was time for photos.

This morning we woke up late. We went out last night and didn’t set alarms. With two podcasts and a photoshoot scheduled, the day started off high stress. We scrambled to get ourselves to the podcast. We surprisingly were only ten minutes late.

This time, however, we somehow were not as lucky.

Between getting food, driving across the city, and changing, we didn’t get enough time in between the first podcast and the photoshoot. Of course this used up the last of Colby’s patience. He was snappy and unapproachable because it was supposed to work, and now, other people had been waiting for us and the podcast was pushed back as well.

Sam and I were wholeheartedly fine with taking the brunt of it too.

But by the time I walked on set, my own frustration pooled in my stomach. Colby’s eyes still flared angry and spiteful even as I looked at them. He blinked a few times before he looked away.

We posed and were posed by the photographers for such a long time, I was tired of pretending to smile and, honestly, I was simply tired of being perceived in such a vulnerable way. Sure, the other three were more used to it, especially Sam and Colby, but damn. I was fatigued and dizzied with alternating emotions.

Tara and I posed alone together next which was alleviating.

My brain turned off.

Then it was Sam and Colby’s turn alone.

My brain turned on when Sam gestured me over.

I wanted to coil up and rot in my bed. I was tired, Colby stressed me out, Sam was snappy with me, and Tara just wanted to sleep. We were falling apart, but when I came back to them, they were somehow brighter. They talked to and cooperated with the photographer more, and the three of us got shots that I was actually excited about.

What numbed me and gave me a second wind was the feeling of Colby’s hands on my waist, him against my side, and our backs to each other. He grabbed my arm during a pose set up and I swore my skin melted to the bone. I felt it through the rest of the day.

Then, we changed and did it all over again.

An hour later, we were leaving the studio when Colby got the call.

The last podcast was canceled.

No one talked when we piled in the car. It was pure silence, and I looked in the rear view mirror slowly. I watched Colby. He looked down at his phone and texted for a little while until he started music. Then he looked up. His eyes locked on mine.

No one spoke. Neither of us looked away. He didn’t look happy, to say the least.

”What are we going to do?” Sam sighed. The only one brave enough to speak to Colby was him obviously; he was the only one Colby wouldn’t kick out of the car. Probably.

”I don’t know,” he sighed and looked away from me and adjusted how he sat. His head hit the head rest. “I’m fucking tired and done with today.”

”Let’s just go out.”

”Again?” I gasped. The burning in my throat from last night returned.

“It’s Saturday night and I know a group’s about to get dinner before hitting a couple clubs,” Tara said as her eyes still locked on her phone. I looked back at Colby. He was already looking at me. I looked back at Tara.

”I mean, we have to be at the airport at five in the morning.”

”We’ll sleep on the plane.”

”Being hungover on a plane doesn’t seem like a fun way to fly.”

”You’re flying regardless,” Colby intervened. I looked back at him. His eyes were thinner, darker. “Let’s just go.”

”Fine.”

And that’s how we ended up drunker than we ever had.

I was hungover before I finished my umpteenth shot, Tara was on the table, and Sam found the girl he had been talking to. Of course she was a part of our group now; the group Tara texted.

The haze in Colby’s eyes calmed me down. He spoke enthusiastically and smiled more than not. Finally, it felt like we wound down to our regular selves again.

“Come on!”

“I really can’t—“

”Please! It’s our last time here for a while, let’s just have fun!”

”Tara, I can’t even walk straight without running into things. What makes you think I can dance?”

”Everyone’s so close anyway, you don’t have to hold yourself up.” Her arms yanked me out of the sofa before another protest had the time to settle. I was followed.

I didn’t know by who, but I felt the presence behind me as we made our way across the dark club. Finally, Tara led me across the threshold of the dance floor. Then she spun around and didn’t let go of my hand.

Her eyes lifted behind me. An evil smile pulled at her mouth.

”What’s wrong—“

”Nothing,” she cut me off, and pulled me from looking behind me. “Come on.”

She didn’t have to tell me twice. I felt the music reverberating through me like a vessel already. If I was going to be in pain all day tomorrow, I might as well make the most of it tonight.

It didn’t take long, but I felt a hand on my arm, a pressure on my body, and I turned around wildly. A face I couldn’t recognize, and Tara yanked me away, closer to her.

I watched her mouth but I couldn’t hear her words. I nodded and smiled in agreement anyway, and danced with her.

And again, hands found my waist, but this time more pressure in places that I definitely didn’t ask for it to be, so I gasped a breath and whipped myself around, but the hands were off of me before I got the chance to see who it was.

I looked up to Colby who shoved someone—the pressure I supposed—behind him. He looked back to the man who grabbed me. Violently, he spoke and shoved again. I didn’t understand what he said but I agreed. Wholeheartedly.

”Colby,” I gasped as if he could hear me.

With the shaking of his head, he stepped into my personal space.

”How did you know I didn’t want to dance with someone?” He scoffed.

“I don’t care if you wanted to or not, clearly you didn’t ask for that.”

”I could have taken care of it.”

”And? That was gross. I was right there.”

Right, Colby followed us to the dance floor. That’s right. I felt his eyes on me the entire time.

”Why were you watching us?”

”Because you’re drunk as hell and both of you are half the size as the majority of people here.” Why did I like the hostility on his tongue? I almost tasted the alcohol that intoxicated him.

”Yeah, that’s all it is, isn’t it?”

”What else would it be?” There it was. That flirty flick up of his eyebrow. We were the only three paused in the sea of dancing bodies.

”Just—Come on,” Tara grumbled and gripped both of our elbows. “Can’t have any fun with you when Colby’s around, can I?”

”What the fuck does that mean?”

Tara didn’t respond.

She went back to friends, but Colby grabbed me and held me back.

Again, his grip was heaven itself there in that hell hole. I spun back to him. I didn’t miss the way his eyes flickered across my full face before settling on my eyes. Drunken mistakes.

”No, tell me,” he said. Lowly.

”Tell you what?” I scoffed. He rolled his eyes.

”What else would I defend you like that for?” My gaze fell from his eyes, his nose, lips, chest, the floor.

I shook my head.

”I’m drunk as hell.”

”Yeah same,” he sighed. He took a step back. His eyes didn’t leave me though.

”Why do you look at me like that?” He shook his head. Don’t ask the things you don’t want to know about. “Stop looking at—Talk to me,” I demanded.

”You’re so—“ He gritted his teeth and his voice caught in his throat when his hands found my face and held me still. My lips parted fairly widely as shock rose my eyebrows. His eyes looked at me. With intention.

My body caught ablaze, and I didn’t like it. Not this time. This kind of wildfire was destructive; non rebuildable.

”Colby—“

He just looked at me. Even closer. I almost felt the sweetness of his mouth on mine.

”I’m more of an all or nothing kind of girl, Colby, not—not a one and done like you,” I said. My calmest words laced with a poison that furrowed his eyebrows. “I don’t do those smash and dashes like you do, so if that’s what you’re looking for, you can go back to those models you fuck every other day because that’s not the kind of body you’ll find here.”

Hurt spread across his face. His hands slowly fell from me, and for the first time, I wanted to take the words back.

“Really?” He gasped. It cut deeper; his hurt. I didn’t mean it.

Maybe I got it all wrong.

”That—Really? That’s what you have to say to me?”

”Colby,” I spat his name through teeth weakened by grit. “Don’t ruin our new friendship, I was liking it way too much.”

”I’m not ruining anything. You don’t know what I want.”

”Then you’re confusing. Too complicated for me.” I stepped away from him. He took a step towards me. “I don’t appreciate my best friends using me.”

”Good. I don’t either.”

”So what’s this?” I gesture to his hands. “Why do you touch me like that? And why does it look like you could kiss me at any moment?”

”Are you projecting or something? Because my wanting to kiss you doesn’t equate to using you.”

A laugh burst from me.

”So when you kissed all those other girls in front of me even after we texted the way we do and after you fucked them, you didn’t use them?” My head cocked to the side in defiance.

Fire blazed in his eyes.

”You’re ridiculous.”

”I am?” I shouted.

”You don’t know anything.”

”Right,” I scoffed. “Not like you’ve made advancements in helping me know something—Colby.”

He grabbed my face like he did and shoved himself back into my space. This time, I felt his front collide into mine. My hands grabbed his wrists.

I froze.

My lips parted the moment his grazed mine.

He caught me. His eyes lifted to mine with a smirk slowly pulled at his dark lips.

“So you talk your shit but you’d still kiss me back?”

”Fuck you,” I spat. He smiled evilly.

”You’d love to, wouldn’t you?” He molded his words over my bottom lip, and I opened my mouth for more.

“Mm, maybe,” I mumbled. His eyes blew wide when I bit down on his bottom lip. “But I would love it more if you didn’t fuck me over after.”

He shook his head quickly.

”I wouldn’t,” I think he gasped so quietly that only by the breath on my skin could I discern his words.

I retracted my teeth and replaced them with my lips.

That was when one of his hands traveled to my messy pulled back hair and he kissed me with such intensity that I’m sure I fell to the ground. A noise escaped my throat but I didn’t back down. I couldn’t when his hands were firm on my body like he knew it already.

So of course I kissed him back like he was mine.

He always was, wasn’t he? I licked into his mouth first, and I think it caught him off guard because a deep moan pressed against my tongue and his thumb jutted under my chin as if to hold me in place. The taste of our drinks mixed in our mouths, and I breathed him in like I needed the hit.

I think he moaned my name; all this time he took a step and then another step into me as if he aimlessly tried to find a stable surface to pin me but couldn’t. He was too drunk to remember that we were in the middle of a bustling club. I ran into someone. I didn’t care.

I took advantage of his leap of shock and my lips wrapped around his tongue. That was when his eyes opened and he slowly looked down at me in surprise when we ever so slowly retract from each other.

”Holy shit,” I thought I heard, and we must have both heard since we both looked over in the direction of our friends.

Sam stared back at us and Tara’s pouty smirk fired directly at me.

Colby took three big steps away from me. Looked at me.

”Colby,” I said but he left me and walked towards Sam.

Sam and Colby walked towards the back door of the club with a dictionary of words between them. Tara stood in front of me.

”It’s 2:30, we gotta go and get ready for our flight.”

”But—But Colby—“

”I know, but we gotta go. Sam was going to be sick.”

I took her hand as she took mine and her friend dropped us off at my house.

The taste of Colby’s lips was the only thing that kept the vomit in the back of my throat.

That sunrise was not kind.

I vomited while packing. I vomited while in the Uber. And again while waiting at the terminal.

At least we got through TSA without a vomit session.

I wanted those hands on me again. To numb the pain. I typically didn’t hurt this bad with a hangover.

I plopped in my seat and Tara already cuddled up into me with her neck pillow and blanket. I checked my phone.

New message from my best friend, but that was it.

I couldn't blame them—to be fair—it was still the night for them, and if Sam had to be sick while at the club, I knew he would be drunk until the late morning and hungover by sundown. Colby on the other hand was drunk, but I couldn’t tell if he was drunk enough to be hungover. I couldn’t read him at all tonight—last night. I understood his mouth perfectly well though, and unfortunately I wanted to communicate more.

Or fortunately? I couldn’t decide quite yet.

I fell asleep before we took off.

When I woke up, the sun blared into the cabin like a lightning rod. I moaned and squinted my eyes, and stretched in my sleep.

”Oh good, you’re up,” Tara said. I looked over at her. Her AirPods were in, a roller was in her hair, and she watched Netflix on her laptop as she filed her nails. “I was getting bored.”

”Jesus Christ, Tara. I’m going to be sick.”

”Ha! No you’re not. Take this.” She handed me a pill and what looked to be an antibacterial wipe. “I don’t give a fuck if you gotta stick that wipe up your nose; you won’t be vomiting on this plane. That’s so embarrassing.”

”Tara,” I moaned and sat up more. The nausea sickened me. I dry swallowed the pill. The alcohol from the wipe did, in fact, aid my hangover bile. ”What time is it?”

”Ten. We’ve been on the flight for like four hours.” I sighed and sat upright in my seat with my eyes clamped shut. My thoughts battled to ward off the nausea. “So, Sam and I walked in on you making out with Colby last night.”

”Oh my god, don’t remind me.”

“What the fuck was that about, huh?”

”God, I have no idea”

”And you didn’t even do anything after as well.” I shot her a glare.

“The fuck you mean ‘do anything?’ Obviously we weren’t going to fuck if that’s what you’re saying.” I rolled my head away from her and leaned it on my hand. It needed physical support too not just emotional.

“What are you talking about?” She laughed. “The tension has been making me sick. I thought you guys were finally going to get it over with.”

That annihilated my ability to ward off nausea.

”I’m going to throw up.”

”Fucking don’t, bitch,” she threatened me with her nail file. “We have to get our nails done in New York because I feel like a dirty girl when we’re going to nice clubs or whatever.”

”We can get them done.” The thought of a nail salon scent quenched the nausea.

”Anyway, about Colby—“

”I do not want to hear that name right now.”

Tara looked at me with concern. A frightening silent concern. The concern was only heavily serious when Tara was quiet.

”He didn’t look happy after he kissed you. What happened?” And how could I lie to that hushed worrisome voice.

”I told him that—oh god what did I say?” I tried to remember as I rubbed my eyes. Thank god Tara convinced me to take off—and also partially helped me—take off my makeup last night. “I said something like I’m not into hooking up like he is—Oh, I’m not a one and done kind of girl. I told him I wanted all of him or nothing.”

”Shit,” Tara gasped. “That’s kind of a lot, isn’t it?”

”I mean he tried to kiss me, Tara! Before we even talked about it.”

”Okay? What’s the problem with that?”

”I really enjoyed our friendship,” I sighed. “I don’t want it bursting into flames. Hanging out with them and working with them is amazing, and once it does inevitably fuck up after we actually date, then I can’t lose them.”

”I know it doesn’t work for everyone, but you could still be friends with them.” I sighed heavily. Tara’s eyes still examined me.

”There’s no way I could feel for Colby the way you do for Jake right now.”

”How come?” I opened my mouth to speak but no words found me. “You—You’re really serious about Colby, aren’t you?”

”Yes, but-but not to say you weren’t serious about—“

”No, I know,” Tara quickly said. “I get it. We’re a lot less unserious after our relationship. We just tried it and it was fun be we aren’t meant to be together romantically.”

”That’s the thing, Tara,” I grumbled and finally looked at her. “How do you not get attached? I’m already scarily attached to him. Fuck; I hate him for it too.” She lips curled in a smirk. “Stop fucking looking at me like that.”

”You are so down bad for that man it’s hilarious.”

”What would be hilarious is if you shut the fuck up.”

”Just admit that you love him so much that you would rather never see him again than not be romantic with him.”

”You’re literally putting words in—Do you not hear the words coming out of my mouth?” Tara rolled her eyes at me and I sighed. I settled in my chair.

“I know. I get it, I do.”

”I just don’t know what I’m going to do, Tara. I already fucked up a lot between us whether we pursue each other or not.”

”How come?”

“I basically called him a slut too.”

”You-You what?” She gasped. She choked back a laugh before it burst out of her. “That is the most diabolical thing—“

”I know it was so wrong of me, but I was drunk and terrified.”

”I know.”

”Tara!” I gasped. “He fucks everything that breathes!” The anger stung my gritted teeth and she parted her lips with surprise. “Do you not fucking see it?” I shout in a whisper. “He has a new fucking partner every damn week which-which whatever, that’s fine, but then he texts me the way he does and it’s like he wants to get in my pants too, just for the sake of it!”

”Whoa, how do you text? Give me your phone.”

”No way.”

”You sent him nudes?”

”What? No!” My blush flared hot. She rolled her eyes.

”I’ve known Colby for so long, it’s nothing I haven’t seen.”

”We haven’t fucking—Wait what the fuck does that mean?”

”Jesus Christ, no need to get wound up. I haven’t fucked him; remember Jake used to live with them. I stayed there weeks at a time.” I nodded and handed her my phone. We really didn’t have anything important to hide.

As she read the texts, my heart quickened. Her silence scared me.

”Oh my god,” she gasped. “The damn tension is even worse in text.”

”Give It back,” I spat and stole it from her. “What tension? We’re just friends.”

”Pf, yeah; friends that are able to make any conversation dirty talk. Now stop being a pussy and-and suck his dick or something.“

”Tara!” I cried. I shoved my phone back in my bag. “There’s no way—No! I-I can’t do that.”

”Oh right, you’re so in love with him you want to have sex with him and let him kiss you all gentle—“ Her silly baby voice physically ignited the fiery anger inside of me.

”Seriously,” I spat and held my hand up. “It’s not like that.”

”Oh,” she gasped. “Right, it’s Colby I forgot. He might not like gentle sex.”

”Nor relationships, so let’s stop speaking about something I can’t have.” Tara looked at me as seconds ticked by.

”You do really like him.” I nodded slowly. “If you liked him enough, then what could come of it would be worth risking ever speaking to him the same way again.”

I stared at her wide eyed.

Where did that wisdom come from?

”Potentially.”

“Then talk to him like an adult. And don’t do it when you’re drunk; you disrespect him like that again and he’ll cut you off without you even getting about to suck his—“

”If you’re so obsessed with his dick, why don’t you suck it yourself?” I spat.

”Damn, alright. He’s yours.”

”He’s not mine,” I spat. “If last night was anything to go by.”

”No no,” Tara exasperated. “You literally have it all wrong. He looked so-so enthralled by you, that you’re already his. That’s why it pissed him off so much.”

”He wouldn’t be pissed off if he talked to me like an adult and didn’t fuck other women.”

”Talk to him.”

”You’re acting like you know something.”

”Obviously neither of them talk to me and I supposed neither of them talk to Johnnie or Jake because those two boneheads are clueless as always.” I smiled. “Talk to him. Both of you attitudes are starting to piss me off. I just want to have fun with my best friends without stepping on eggshells.” She sipped her drink.

”I fucking need one of those.”

”It’s a mimosa.”

”I know.”

”You literally were about to throw up.” I rolled my eyes and kicked back in my seat.

”I need to be drunk again.”

“Ma’am, yes ma’am,” she sighed as she eyed down a flight attendant. “Oh, you’re fucking hot by the way.”

”Exuse me?” I choked on nothing.

”Your tattoos are great, and I can’t believe you sent him and underwear pic.” My face burned.

”That was on accident. I was delusional and got out of bed before I was awake at 6am.”

”Yeah, uh-hu. Keep telling yourself that.” And Tara caught the attendant as she passed us.

Between us and the hangovers, it was easy sailing until touchdown.

When we stepped into the airport, my phone rang off the hook with late messages. Of which, Colby was missed. My stomach did that familiar flip at the sight of his name in my messages.

I stared at my phone wide eyed and breathless, and it must have taken me far too long to get going, because Tara peered over my shoulder.

”Damn, see I told you. He set the stage for you, now speak like an adult.” I looked at her sunglasses covered face. I judged her for looking like a freak wearing Jake’s inappropriately too large hoodie with the hood over the roller in her hair as she wore sunglasses on her face that were big enough to cover a horse’s eyes.

Not like I could judge; I might have been wearing Sam’s hoodie and Colby’s sweatpants with my own sunglasses covering my hangover but that’s neither here nor there.

“Let’s go,” I told her and we bulldozed our way through the airport and towards whichever fancy hotel Tara picked the month prior.

And the hotel was very nice.

It was large enough for an entire group to crash in after a night out. The window showed the evening city as night fell, and I wanted nothing more than to curl up in the bed that could easily hold four people. I stared out the window for sometime as Tara got settled in. I could have been thinking about our plans for the morning, where we were going to get—most likely—brunch and where we would go thrifting after, but there I stood in the nicest hotel room in New York City I’ve ever been in thinking about Colby.

I thought to text him now.

I will.

Maybe.

My eyes fell heavy, and it took effort to pull myself from the window.

“Thinking about room service. Forgot to get food before.”

”I know, I was just dreaming about this bed,” I moaned as I collapsed into it.

I fell asleep before Tara got off call with room service.

I woke up when the food came.

”Get up or else I’m eating all this pizza.” I slugged over to sit hip to hip with her as the food sprawled ahead of us.

“I’m beat.”

”And once we eat, we can sleep so long and happy once our bellies are full.” She logged into her Netflix on the TV as I scrolled on my phone.

“Okay can we eat now, like damn.”

”Sorry,” I laughed as I read the last word he sent, and my phone was tossed to the bedding.

“How much will you text him? This is supposed to be our chilled out work week; emphasis on boyless work week.”

”Yeah I know, I was going to call him after we eat so we can talk about whatever the fuck happened last night.”

”Okay,” she said as she took a bite.

“Then we will be boyless.”

”Good.”

And she was right. My eyes rolled back even more so as the pizza settled in our systems. She got ready for bed as I slid out onto the balcony to talk to Colby. The chilly air was certainly more than enough to prevent me from falling asleep.

”Hi.”

”Hi,” he said back. “How are you feeling?”

”I’m good, better,” I sighed. “It was kind of the worst flight of my life though.”

”That’s what I was worried about. Good thing you made it through.”

”Yeah, hardly though. Tara threatened me and stuffed alcohol wipes in my nose every time I moved.”

”Oh my god,” he laughed. “I felt really bad last night. You were so sick and then Sam was sick—god, he still is—and I was just like, ‘shit, maybe this was a bad idea’ especially after—everything.”

”Yeah, I know. But-But it’s fine; it was fine. I had a good night. Just won’t do it before a five am flight ever again.”

Silence.

”I wanted to talk about last night though, like what happened between us.”

”I know,” I sighed and released the energy. “First I wanted to say sorry for what I said to you; I didn’t mean it and it was really disrespectful. I was so drunk and should have closed my mouth especially since that’s your business anyway. I feel really bad and didn’t mean it.”

”I-I know,” he said not too convincingly. “It—I mean, I get where you’re coming from and alcohol amplified everything.” My eyebrow twinged with question.

”What do you mean ‘where I’m coming from?’”

”I mean—“ He took his time and I bit through the first layer of skin on my lip. “I-I guess it’s no secret I’m not with anyone and don’t—didn’t have any plan to be. I—oh my god—I was going to say I wanted to just have fun, but I’m such a mess it isn’t fun anymore.”

”Why are you such a mess?” My voice was low as if it knew the answer.

”I guess I’m not wanting to be alone but I’m also just not-not wanting to commit or anything.”

”Oh.” I didn’t mean to be so short, and he took a breath to say something quick but I interjected. “Why did you kiss me then? You heard what I said and I did—and still do—mean it. So why did you kiss me like-like you meant it or something?”

”I’m just as confused as you are about it.” I didn’t appreciate the frustration in his tone.

”Oh yeah? What’s so confusing about it, then? I’m not confused.”

“What?” He gasped. I could tell I picked and picked at the seams until he couldn’t keep it back anymore. “You told me I was confusing to you last night. I’m confused as well.”

”I’m not confused about the situation but I’m confused about the damn choices you’re making.”

”Oh yeah? And what choices are those?”

”How every time you look at me I’m trying to decipher whether you want to kiss me but then you don’t and go kiss another girl like usual. I’m not into this whole—this whole yearning thing. I don’t do situationships or adjacent dysfunction, okay? So if you want to kiss me like you did last night, then I’m the only one you’re kissing and that’s what I’m not confused about.”

”You think I don’t want to kiss you like that?” He gasped. My throat clamped together. “If last night was anything to go by, you’d know that I’ve only ever wanted to kiss you like that. But it’s so much more real.”

”How is it so real?” I scoffed. The bitterness flowed from me, and I didn’t hold it back. How could I? There was so much unknowingly built in my chest and it needed to be relieved. “If it were real, you would kiss me. You wouldn’t fuck any other thing that breathes; you would come to me.”

”Jesus fucking—I don’t fuck anyone! Why do you keep saying that?”

Speechless choked me.

”You-You what?”

”I’ve slept with two people all through last year and no one this year, alright? Just because I might have fun or take photos with people doesn’t mean shit. I’ve only slept with—“

”You don’t have to tell me. I’m-I’m not—I trust you.” I didn’t like the way my voice shook, but I sat still in disbelief. Those nasty things I told him—

“Please,” he sighed. “I’m not—I don’t like to fuck around like that. I mean yeah maybe I do, but not like that. Not the amount you think I have. Do you really think so poorly of me?”

”I don’t-I don’t think poorly of anyone who does that, Colby. Especially not you. The thing that ticked me off was how you treated me. I could only think of those girls; did they know that you talked to me like that? Did they like to hook up meaninglessly like that? I didn’t want to be responsible for any messy situation that came of it.”

”And you wouldn’t have,” he said all too sweetly. “It’s my responsibility and I wouldn’t throw you under the bus like that. I mean; if there even were a bus. Every time I would ‘take someone home’ they would just leave in their own Uber and I’d go back with Sam. Or if I went to their house, honestly I would just crash at Jake and Johnnie’s for the night so that Sam could have the house for the night.” I never thought about those things. Unfairly too; I always believed the worst.

I took a lengthy pause. I was still upset. Unsatisfied. So I yanked harder.

”Then why do you loop me into all of this? Why play with me and kiss me just to go back to how we were?”

”Who said I would ever do it?”

”I don’t know!” I burst out. “Maybe it’s because I saw with my own eyes the amount of girls you were with and didn’t know the details. It’s like you wanted me but kept me on edge for fun.”

”That’s not-That’s definitely not what happened or what I was thinking at all.”

”Then what is, Colby? What the fuck are you thinking about me then, because I’m getting fed up and—“

”I’m thinking that if I just got my shit together and-and got over things I was scared of, I could have you and talk to you about how I feel about you.”

”Which is how?”

”God fucking damnit, you’re really making me spell it out, hm?” I shrugged.

”Obviously. I’m not here to fuck around anymore. I like having fun with my friends and I do not like being used and thrown away. I have more self respect than to be fucked over again and again.”

”I wouldn’t do that.”

”And you’ve given me no reason that you wouldn’t or proof that you would do any better.” The phone etched into my palms from the amount of force I used to hold it.

”God fucking—“ He paused and I heard a breath. “You’re so fucking difficult.”

”I’m difficult? You’re putting my through the ringer because you can’t communicate.”

”I can’t communicate? When did you ever tell me that you didn’t like it when I was with other girls?”

”I don’t know maybe because it’s not my fucking place? Jesus Christ, you think I have the audacity to nose my way into your business?”

”Well you’ve fucking nosed your way into every other area of my life.” I dragged in a deep breath.

I saw red. I finally understood what it felt like when people said that.

”Oh yeah? And whose fault is that exactly?”

”It sure as hell isn’t mine.”

”I swear to god! Ugh! You’re so fucking annoying!”

”I’m annoying?” His voice finally raised. “You’re the one who flirts with me and I get the message that you want something but then you tell me ‘oh, no my expectations are so much higher than what you could reach’ and then get mad when I can’t reach them?”

“You haven’t fucking tried!” I finally yelled. “And you’re projecting! I have never given you my expectations for a relationship and yet you still think you can’t reach them, what am I just some selfish bitch to you or something? You haven’t asked or talked to me about anything serious at all! The only thing you know about my personal needs in a relationship is that I’d like for it to be exclusive and serious. I didn’t realize that was just so fucking hard for anyone to give me.”

”Becase you’re looking in the fucking wrong direction!”

I paused for a moment. I licked my dry lips.

”Oh so then you think the problem is you? Because I know having standards—and low ones, might I add—isn’t typically an issue for people.”

”You are—oh my fucking god.” I heard the way his voice grew quieter as he pulled the phone from his ear in frustration. “Maybe—listen to me—Maybe I think you’re looking in the wrong direction because you need someone who can fit your expectations. Not because you’re too much but because I care about you enough to make sure you’re taken care of and not at risk for it blowing up in your face since clearly that’s all I’m good at.”

”Colby,” I gasped.

This was never about my behavior. This wasn’t even about our lack of communication, then.

“When did I ever say I didn’t want you.”

”What?” He spat. “I never said—“

”No, but clearly you think you’re not good enough for me. You don’t know what I want outside of a stable relationship, and that I know you can give me if you try.”

”How do you know that?” His spite was thicker than the words he said.

”I mean-I mean I don’t but you’re smart and clearly you fucking care enough so I supposed you’d figure it out.”

”But that puts you at risk.”

”Fuck!” I yelled. “For as often as you put your physical body at risk with Sam you certainly are against it emotionally. Maybe I know that it’s a risk liking you as much as I do, but maybe it’s one I’m willing to take.”

”But you want—“

”Fucking hell, Colby. I just wanted you!” God it felt so good to say. “I just wanted you without having to worry that one day I wouldn’t be able to see you again because-because if it does blow up, I’m not sure I’ll be able to be friends with you after. That’s how much I care about you and need you.”

He was silent and my own anxiety took the wheel again.

”I-I really liked our friendship and don’t take that lightly; I hope you feel the same way about it—“

”I really do,” he reassured me.

”Then that’s why I didn’t want to be the one to start something more with you. I didn’t want it to blow up—“

”Oh so you wanted me to start it so that whenever it does inevitably blow up, you can blame me?”

”That’s not what I fucking said now, is it Colby? I said—“

”No.” It was so incredibly final that it took center in my stomach like a knife. “I’m not—We’re not doing this.”

”So then that’s it?”

”How much more do you want to lose?” It hit me. He wouldn't be able to go back after that kiss.

”If you think we’ve already lost something, then how bad could it be?”

”I can’t fucking do this right now.”

”Oh come on,” I laughed. “That’s so—That’s such a tap out.”

”No, I’m serious. You’re literally asking me to solidify a relationship with you so that when we break up, it can be my fault.”

”That is not what I’m asking you to do. Like, at all.”

”Yeah? Then what is?”

”I’m asking you to stop being so fucking scared of everything.”

Silence.

”I want you to stop trying to control everything around you all the time. You can’t control how I feel. Stop blaming yourself for things you haven’t even done! I’d never blame you if things didn’t work out between us. But I am blaming you if you keep yourself from me just because you’re scared.”

“I’ve never been so scared of anyone like I’m scared of you.”

”Colby—“

”The way you make me feel is too much. I can’t-I can’t fuck us up. I’d rather you at a safe distance for forever than nowhere near me at all.”

”And if it all blows up, what are we going to do?”

”I can't think about that—“

”No, tell me.”

”I swear,” he laughed.

”Colby, tell me now.”

”I—We’re going to stop speaking. I know that much. I won’t be okay for a long time—“

”What if it all blows up but we just stay together anyway?” He was quiet again as if it was the most confusing thing in the world.

”What-What are you talking about?”

”Things go wrong in relationships all the time. That's why only the people who choose to stay together and work on themselves for the other person last more than 20 years. I don’t understand why a disagreement or argument can derail an entire companionship if they actually care deeply about each other.”

The way he said my name made me forget all the other times my name had been said.

”It’s that much?”

”What?” I asked.

”You actually want me that much?”

”I could.” It was the truth. I did want him—badly—and with time, maybe he could be the only one I would want.

”I think I could let myself want you that much too.”

”Colby, stop saying you’ll ‘let’ yourself. Not everything has to be controlled; literally chill out and let things happen.”

”Okay, okay,” he sighed. I, too, was tired of arguing, and with that sweet tone on his tongue, I wished to sleep cuddled into his side. What a way to begin a month apart from each other. “I trust you.”

”Good. I trust you too.”

It felt like the end of the conversation. I didn’t know where it left us, but we were farther than where we started.

I also trusted the fact that we had much time to think about things before we saw each other again.

”By the way,” he said with that goofy tone that I knew meant something outrageous was brewing in that head. “‘Smash and dash was so fucking funny. If you didn’t literally break my heart in that sentence, I would have cried laughing.”

”Oh my god, shut the fuck up. I have no idea where that came from—“

”It was so good.”

The night was brutal. It took me a second to register the fact that I shivered like my life depended on it.

“Colby,” I mumbled. “I care about you a lot, and maybe that’s why I’m so-so protective, or something, of what—or of how I feel. I didn’t want to stress you into something you didn’t want, and I didn’t—I don’t know—I don’t want to see you scared or in pain.”

“I know, I know. I care about you as well which is why I tried to get rid of my confusion and frustration in some way because I didn’t want to hurt you or not be enough for you. It—All of this is a lot, and I’m not ready for it.”

”Maybe we won’t be,” I sighed. My breath piled in front of me. “We can wait.”

”Yeah,” he agreed.

”I’m so sorry but I’m literally—I’m outside because Tara’s in there and it’s so fucking cold so I was going—”

”Oh my god, yeah go inside.”

”Okay.” I stood up. “I’ll talk to you tomorrow.”

”Okay, also, thanks for talking. You can be—god—you’re so fucking pushy and you never back down.”

“And you’re so damn combative it’s hard to not fight with you.”

”No one usually fights me, they leave or, I don’t fucking know, listen to what I say.”

”Ha!�� I burst out laughing. “That’s so funny. I only listen to myself. I like you a lot, okay? So I’m going to fight back if you sound like an idiot.”

”And you sound like a spoiled bitch who always gets her way.”

”No,” I dragged out. “I just do this thing called thorough communication, and I never sacrifice the things I value just because some boy wants to fuck me.”

”Whoa,” Colby gasped. “I never expected you to sacrifice anything.” I laughed as my face heated up.

”Oh okay maybe so, but you want to fuck me then?”

“We are not talking about that right now.”

“Oh come on, you could have just said no.”

”And now you sound like the idiot.”

”Whatever, I’m going inside so I don’t have to freeze my ass off anymore.”

”You do that. I’m getting food then sleeping another ten hours.”

”Okay good,” I smiled. “Bye.”

”Bye.”

Even when I curled up in my bed happy and content and warm as I could be, I still shook to my core.

And it wasn’t from the winter air.

I woke up to the sound of an alarm, and Tara sitting up to turn it off.

”Why?” I complained. “Why so early?”

”It’s literally nine am. Let’s get up and get ready.”

”Fine,” I grumbled. I stretched so hard that I nearly missed what she said.

”I was asleep by the time you came in last night, what did you and Colby talk about for so long?”

”Honestly? We just argued the entire time but we’re fine now.”

”What?” She laughed. “What did you fight about?”

”Colby’s personal bullshit. Also, we may or may not date; we aren’t sure.”

”That is literally the most you and Colby thing I’ve ever heard,” Tara laughed as she got up. ”You guys are so exclusively not exclusive.”

”And you are so already breaking your rule for having a boyless trip.” She smiled at me as she pulled her glasses on.

”You’re right. Now get ready; we have bagels to eat and thrift stores to infiltrate.”

The day ended as fast as it came, and when we woke up the next morning, we decided to stay in and have a self care day instead of walking because our legs cramped.

I don’t remember another time my mind emptied of stress and worries about work, scheduling, and recording. Maybe we filmed a few videos, and maybe we vlogged, and maybe we met up with friends for a video, but it was a week of my life that my job melted into a privileged everyday life rather than a literal job.

After Tana and Brooke showed up, it was time for a little less self care to say the least.

He didn't respond.

“You’re breaking the law.” I looked up to Tara who sat on the edge of the bed talking to Brooke. I leaned against the head board and dropped my phone to the sheets.

”What are you talking about?”

“See, I didn’t know if you were or not but you just gave yourself away.”

”What law do we have this week?” Brooke asked.

”No speaking about or texting or calling males this week.” Brooke’s eyes rounded and snapped to mine.

”Who were you texting?”

”N—“

”Colby,” Tara sighed.

”Okay, that’s great. Thank you so much for letting that cat out of the bag.” Then Brooke’s eyes widened.

”Am I not supposed to know?”

”No,” I sighed and scooted closer to them. I stole a gummy worm from the bag in between them. “It’s a situationship I fear.”

”Oh I see,” Brooke laughed as a smirk pulled on her rosy lips.

“And it’s becoming a situation for all of us because you keep texting him.”

”You should be glad we aren’t at each other’s throats anymore.”

”I don’t know if you two being at each other’s throats is as bad as being down them anymore—“

”Oh my god, Tara, no. That’s-That’s too far.”

”Yeah, mhm,” she sighed with raised eyebrows. Tana came from the bathroom. “It’s almost like you were the one who went too far with him first.”

”Who’s him?”

”Colby,” Brooke replied to Tana faster than anyone could think.

”Oh,” Tana said as she looked at me up and down. “Honestly that checks out. Is this new?”

”As of three days ago,” I sighed. My head met my hand as if I massaged a headache.

”It’s actually been a nine month long languished yearning slow burn from both of them but apparently Colby has trust issues and she’s just too cut throat for him.”

”Tara,” I spat. “You are just full of it today aren’t you?”

”Yes, now I understand how everyone else felt when Jake and I first started dating and I’m getting flashbacks so I’m snappy.”

”Clearly.”

”You both are breaking your own law,” Brooke intervened.

”That’s true,” I said to Tara with eyebrows raised.

”What law?”

”No speaking about men on this trip,” Brooke told Tana to which Tana laughed, of course.

”I am a felon.”

✧˖*°࿐

Taglist (Comment to be added):

@a-random-google-user

#colby brock #sam and colby #sam golbach #18+ only #minors dni #colby brock smut #colby brock x reader #rosie writings

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lovelyyandereaddictionpoint · 2 months

Note

Hi darling!~ (I'll immediately stop calling you that if you don't like it/don't feel comfortable lol) Lately your girlies been obsessing over the song 'Older' by Isabel LaRosa that's been going BADSHIT popular on tiktok so I thought I'd spill some thoughts~

Teacher!Vil X Yandere(ish)!Student!Yuu

Summary : Yuu who grew up with a bad father and gained heavy daddy issues gets attached to her teacher after he starts giving her the fatherly love and care she never got, always being nice and checking up on her. at first it's a simple silly crush on her teacher but after time it blooms into an obsession where she starts lusting after him and craves constant validation from him. In her eyes he's the perfect guy, he's older and has more experience, he could never treat her wrong. even though he may be colder from time to time she believes he has a soft spot for her. Poor Yuu when the teacher who she fell so madly inlove with doesn't return her feelings and begins distancing himself from her.... Or will he?..

(Your ending <3)

Surprise me sweetheart ♡

-Prev. 🥀🦋 / Now 🎋🪭

I really like that song, might become my newest obsession... 🖤🖤🖤🖤

Yandere Teacher Vil Schoenheit x Obsessed Student Reader

Vil definitely has that aura of an unbiased but caring mentor much like Crewel. He’s confident and quaint, praising you in any capacity thrills most who receive it. Granted it’s sprinkled with underlying insults and a general lack of faith. But for someone like you, who can barely get your own father to even look at you it means so much more:

So of course you’ll obsess over him

Putting him on a pedestal you’re willing to do anything for

Study and pass his class

Tell on all the naughty potatoes in class

Even framing the professor he’s wanted gone since the beginning

“Well done.”

“R-really?”

“Yes, I’m quite pleased you’ve proven to be more helpful than the other useless potatoes.”

“T-thank you M-Mister Vil!”

He doesn’t stop you or even act like he doesn’t reciprocate

A few light touches

A kiss or two

A nibble of the ear

Your friends warn you when they realize the love of your life is the degrading teacher of etiquette

“This isn’t a good idea…(Y/n) he’s like much older than you.”

“So? That just means he has experience!”

“He’s thinking about retirement!”

“Early retirement!”

“Nooo!”

Nothing really stops you from your newfound love

That is until he crashes the illusion himself

“Oh~Roi du Poison, don’t tell me you’ve fallen for the misguided doe?”

“Please, they’re just a tool I’m sharpening. A potato I’ve decided is worth polishing…for the time being.”

It destroys you

What meaning of life is there if he doesn’t even care about yours

You stop showing up to school

You won’t leave your room

“Where is (L/n)?”

“Pft wouldn’t you like to know!”

“We’re not telling you. You don’t deserve to even speak to them.”

“Fine if that’s how it’s going to be, I’ll give your regards to them.”

“What?!” “Wait!”

Unbeknownst to you Vil is very much in love with you

But what did you expect?!

That he’d admit to actually being just as obsessed if not more so than you

He figured the best way to keep you close enough was by taking advantage of your emotional flaw

And while he wasn’t wrong,

he realized the way it’s been going is all too risky

Nosy obstacles friends of yours, suspicious coworkers, gossiping potatoes

It’s just too risky so he’ll promptly resign putting time and energy into his former hobby

Taking the world by storm he’ll disappear

Giving you the so-called space you want so badly

But he’ll be watching

Watching as you mend yourself together only to fall apart again with every new tragedy

Your grades suspiciously slip

Your house is going to be foreclosed

Your father disappears one evening becoming a missing person’s case

And finally, your dear poor friends suddenly die

Catching some sickness after investigating something they refused to tell you about in the forest

It’s there, where you’ve graduated and are at your lowest once again that he makes his move

“It’s been a while, (L/n).”

He’ll skew the events that day claiming the doe was someone else or that it was all a cover

And like that, he’ll slither back into your heart with his leash fully keeping you within his grasp

“For all that trouble, (Y/n) you’re irrevocably mine.”

#yandere x reader #yandere x you #lovelyyandereaddictionpoint #yanderexrea #yandere #yanderes #yandere twisted wonderland #yandere twst #yandere twst x reader #yandere vil schoenheit #yandere vil #yandere vil x reader #yandere vil schoenheit x reader #yandere x gn reader #yandere x gender neutral reader

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eddiemunsons80sbaby · 4 months

Text

Never Say Never

Chapter 7

Pairing: SingleDad!StevexReader

Summary: You are a 32 year old single mother, raising your seven year old son on your own. After being widowed at 30 and going out on awful dates with disgusting men for the past month, you have decided that you're giving up. You already had your great love. One person can't possibly get lucky enough to have two in their lifetime. But then your son starts playing baseball and the coach might just change your mind about that.

No posting schedule.

18+ only for eventual smut

Word Count: 8.4K

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“Now, Eli, remember what we talked about?” you asked your son from the driver’s seat.

You were on your way over to Steve’s house for the cookout and you'd had to lay down some ground rules for your son before you'd left. You could not bear a repeat of the ice skating disaster, especially not in front of his friends. You could just imagine how horrified they would be for you with your son desperately trying to find you a man like you were some pathetic spinster who couldn’t manage to get one on your own.

You could. You absolutely could if you wanted to. You could if there were any decent options out there. Options that didn’t include guys who collected their toenail clippings like they were trading cards or who didn’t call their ex to ensure they drove by while you were at dinner because they were just using you to make them jealous.

But there were options, weren’t there? Steve was an option. Steve was an option that was perfect. You'd yet to find a flaw in him and it was beginning to frustrate you. Maybe that was why he wasn’t an option. How could you ever be good enough to compete with his perfection? Your entire body sagged with exhaustion at the mere thought of trying to be good enough for him.

“I know, mommy. No talking about marriage or dating.”

“And?”

“And definitely no telling Steve that I want him to be my dad.”

“Yes, exactly,” you nodded, smiling at your son in the mirror. But the face that greeted you did not smile. He looked absolutely miserable, deflated, as if you'd taken a needle and popped the balloon that was all his hopes and dreams. You felt like the worst mother ever.

Was it really so awful that Eli wanted a dad? Janice was right. He had a dad. Justin would always be his dad but Justin would never be able to be there for him. He wouldn’t be there to cheer him on at games. He wouldn’t be there to talk to him about dating. He wouldn’t be there to teach him how to shave. He wouldn’t watch him graduate high school or show him how to drive a car.

Of course your son wanted someone to step into those shoes. Of course he wanted someone who could be everything he was missing. It wasn’t awful that he wanted a man in his life but it was mortifying that he was asking some guy he barely knew to not only be his dad but to be your boyfriend. Hell, your husband, because those two were already planning out a wedding, moving in together, being a fully formed family. How could you get him to understand why it wasn’t okay to say those things without breaking his little heart?

“Listen, buddy…I know you want a dad. I know you see Jeremiah with Steve and you are seeing everything that you don’t have. I know how much you miss your dad and there’s nothing wrong with wishing you had that. And Steve is wonderful. I can see why you would choose him but the thing is, you can’t just choose someone. It doesn’t work like that and Steve barely knows us. You can enjoy spending time with him and hanging out with him. You can even love him but you can’t just ask someone to be your dad and you definitely can’t ask someone to be my husband. That has to be something that the grown ups decide.”

“So why aren’t you deciding it?”

“Eli, we barely know each other.”

“So? Jeremiah and I barely knew each other when we decided we were gonna be best friends. Don’t you like him?” your son stubbornly asked and damn, he looked so much like Justin. Justin used to get that exact look on his face when you were being a pain in the ass, which was quite often if you were honest.

“I do. I like Steve a lot.”

“So, why don’t you guys go on a date? You went on a date with those other guys and you said it was awful. But you didn’t know them. You already know Steve and you said he’s wonderful. Just go on a date and make the decision.”

Once again, you found yourself wishing that life were as simple as your son seemed to think it was. But it wasn’t. Nothing about this was simple. You were a mess. You were the emotional equivalent of a town leveled by a tornado. You couldn’t get out of your head long enough to even allow yourself to relax with Steve. How would you ever ask him out?

“I’m sorry, Eli. I’m sorry if Mommy hasn’t been doing a good enough job.”

“What do you mean?”

“I try. I try to be both for you. I know you’re missing out on something and I try to make up for it but I know I can never be everything your dad would have been for you. I’m sorry if you’re feeling like this because I haven’t done enough.”

“No, mommy. You’re the best mommy in the world. You read comics with me, we have backwards dinner, we build legos together. I don’t want Steve to be my daddy because you’re not enough. I want Steve to be my daddy because I think it would make you happy too. You’re the best mommy and you’re so sad sometimes. I hear you crying and it makes me really sad. I know it’s because you’re all alone. I just want you to be happy and when you’re with Steve you smile all the time. I think being a family with him and Jeremiah would make all of us happy.”

You blinked fast and furious against the tears, “Buddy, you are the best thing that’s ever happened to me. You make me so happy. I’m not ever alone because I have you.”

“But you need a person. You always say daddy was your person. I know I make you happy but I think you need someone to be in love with like Belle and Beast or Aladdin and Jasmine. You take such good care of me. You should have someone to take care of you and Steve is a nice guy. I think he would take really good care of you.”

You slowed as you turned onto Steve’s street, releasing a slow breath. Your son wasn’t wrong. Steve would take amazing care of you. He would take amazing care of your son. You didn’t think he could ever be capable of anything less than amazing.

He was everything that authors wrote about in romance novels. He was the leading man in every romantic movie you'd ever watched. He was the guy you imagined in your dreams when you were a little girl, picturing the guy you would marry, your soulmate, your person. He was fiction come to life, the very definition of flawless. And you just kept getting in your own way, terrified to move forward, scared of what that could mean, of the power that would give him, knowing you couldn’t survive another loss.

Maybe Janice was right. Maybe your son was right. Maybe you needed to take that step, to stop being frozen in time and finally start moving forward. Maybe you needed to stop being petrified of what could happen in the future and just enjoy the moment, now, while you had it. Maybe you needed to stop living with a ghost, a ghost who wasn’t there anymore, a ghost who couldn’t love you. Maybe Justin would want you to be happy, would want your son to have someone in his life. Of course he’d rather it be him, but if it couldn’t be, you had to believe that he wouldn’t want them to be all alone. He would want to know they were taken care of.

“You know what? How about we let this one play out on its own and see what happens?” you asked your son, turning to him as you parked the car in the drive. “We don’t even know if Steve likes me or would want to go on a date with me. You never know what could happen but you can’t force it to happen, okay?”

There it was. There was that bright light shining in your son’s eyes that you loved so much. There was that hope that everything was going to be okay. No, not hope, belief. His little seven year old self just believed that everything would work out and you envied him for that, wishing it could be so easy for you. He nodded eagerly at you with a big toothy grin but there was something a little mischievous in his expression that left you a bit uneasy. Had he heard all your words or, like usual, had he only heard the parts he wanted to listen to?

“Eli…” you began but then your door was being wrenched open and a voice was screeching in your ear.

“Oh my god! Steve said you were coming but I didn’t believe him and now you’re here and I finally get to meet you! I am so excited!”

A blur of dark blond hair, white teeth, and flailing arms grabbed onto you, pulling you from the car and into a bone crushing hug. You gasped for breath, your brain racing to catch up to whatever the hell was happening right now. Who was this person and why were they so excited to see her?

“Robin! Jesus Christ…”

Steve’s irritated voice rang over the squeals in your ear and then the girl’s body was being pulled away from you. You blinked, dazed from her crazed welcome, to find Steve pinching the bridge of his nose. He sighed deeply, shaking his head.

“I’m so sorry about that. She’s like a tidal wave that’s just crashing over you before you can even run and then suddenly you’re drowning. She’s been bouncing around my kitchen, watching out the window for the two of you to get here.”

You glanced from Steve to Robin who was clicking her fingers together, bouncing on her toes, a huge grin separating her face in two. So, this was the best friend. It came back to you now that you could get proper oxygen to your brain once again.

She was pretty, the kind of pretty that just was without even trying very hard. Dark blond waves fell down to her shoulders. Deep blue eyes sat atop a perky nose that was splattered with freckles that continued along her cheeks. She wore a black tee with cargo pants and tennis shoes. She had minimal make-up on, just a touch of mascara and lip gloss and you found yourself deeply grateful to have found a kindred spirit that was in Steve’s life, someone who didn’t paint her face fully before heading out into the world.

“So, you’re Robin, I take it,” you said, offering your hand. “It’s so good to meet you. Steve’s told me about you.”

“Oh, I have heard sooooo much about you!” Robin laughed, taking your hand and pulling you into another hug. “I practically feel like we’re already best friends. Steve talks about you non-stop.”

“Robin!” Steve hissed.

“Whatever.” She waved her hand with a roll of her eyes. “He does. Of course he tells me everything. That’s the perks that come with being best friends. There is nothing I don’t know about Steve. I mean, absolutely nothing.” She started laughing, finally releasing you as she took a step back, her hands flailing wildly. “Like, did you know that when he was a baby he crawled backwards? I mean, like this.” She placed her hands in front of her, pantomiming a backwards crawl. “Isn’t that hysterical? Who crawls like that? Until he went backwards down some steps and conked his head. Oh! And one time, we had a blood drive at our high school and Steve went. He was being all cocky, thinking he didn’t need the cookie and juice. He was a man and could handle a little blood being taken, right? Until he passed out in the boy’s bathroom and had to get six stitches in his head from where he hit it on the urinal. Gross, right? Oh! And this one time…”

“Robin, seriously,” Steve groaned, holding up his hands. “Please stop.” He turned to you, eyes rolling upward, an annoyed smile tensing his face.

“Fine,” his best friend huffed, folding her arms but then she leaned into you with a grin. “But if you want to know the best stories about Steve, you know where to go.”

“Best stories about Steve?” came another voice as a short, curly haired guy appeared on the front porch. “Oh, I definitely have a few of those. Remember when Billy Hargrove pantsed you in front of the whole school? That was pretty humiliating.”

You choked back a laugh, looking apologetically at Steve when he shot you an annoyed look. You shrugged, pressing your lips together hard. Okay, nobody wanted to get pantsed but he was the popular guy, the guy all the girls wanted. How bad could it be?

“I mean, it’s embarrassing but it can’t have been that bad,” you said sympathetically.

“Oh, it was that bad. Our boy decided to go commando that day. The whole school got a first eye look at his twig and berries.”

“Why in the hell were you going commando?” you asked, snorting.

“I didn’t have any clean underwear, okay? My parents were out of town and the maid wasn’t coming for another two days and I didn’t know how to do laundry. I had no other choice.”

Your eyebrows lifted, “You didn’t know how to do a load of laundry when you were in high school?”

“Are you kidding?” the new guy chortled, bounding down the steps and approaching Steve, propping his elbow up on his shoulder. “King Steve? Mr. Richie Rich? He had people to do that kind of shit for him. Why would he ever get his hands dirty like that?”

“You know, who needs enemies when I have friends like the two of you?” Steve cringed, roughly raising his shoulder to knock his friend’s elbow off. “Do you find amusement in humiliating me as much as humanly possible?”

The curly headed guy shrugged with a grin so wide, you could see all of his teeth. Even his eyes joined in, squinting into slits, the smile taking up his whole face. He was adorable. He might be grown but there was something so boyish about his features that just made him precious and darling, like Eli when he gave you those big eyes and that sad face. You could see this guy getting whatever he wanted because that face would be hard to refuse.

“It is a constant source of pleasure in my life, Steve. So, thank you for that.” He stuck his hand out to her. “Dustin.”

“Y/N,” you replied, giving his hand a quick shake. “I’ve heard all about you too. The unofficially adopted little brother, right?”

Dustin laughed, “I guess. More like I got stuck with this guy because my mom decided he would be a good role model for me. She signed him up as a babysitter even though I was way too old and far too smart to require one.”

“Mommy, can I go inside and find Jeremiah?” Eli asked, hands pulling at the hem of your top. He was obviously not finding this conversation very interesting.

“Yeah, kid. He’s out back with Miles in the sandbox. I’m sure he’s just waiting for you. It’s all he’s been talking about since he woke up this morning,” Steve answered. “Go on through.” Folding his arms, he rolled his eyes toward you. “Jere loves when Miles ‘plays’...,” he made air quotes around the word, “in the sandbox with him. Really, the big oaf just digs and then sprinkles sand all over my house.”

Another car pulled in the drive and you turned in interest. Steve hadn’t mentioned anyone else being here for the cookout. A boy with a fade stepped out from the driver’s seat and a girl with long red hair emerged from the other side. The back door opened and a boy with a prominent nose and jet black hair appeared, holding the hand of another girl with shoulder length light brown hair. Apparently, this was a bigger gathering than he’d originally told you.

“You made it!” Steve called out, approaching the newcomers.

The boy with shaggy hair was getting into the trunk, “Yeah. We were just waiting on Lucas.” He rolled his eyes toward the boy.

“Sorry that I had work to do, Mike,” Lucas muttered. “You know, it’s tax season. It’s not my fault that so many people always wait until the last possible minute to take care of it.”

“Well, Max is working on a new case and yet she still managed to be ready on time,” Mike shot back.

“Yeah but it’s barely begun. I have the first meeting with the client to talk legal strategy and next steps this week. Besides, it’s easy to have lots of time when you’re working from home, right Mike? How’s that novel coming along?” the red head challenged.

“It’s coming! I got another seven hundred words written yesterday. You know, writing a novel is not as simple as you all seem to think it is. There’s a lot of research that goes into it.”

“Research? Into a fantasy book based off your DnD adventures?” Steve laughed. “What are you researching? How to still be cool when you’re a massive nerd?”

“Hey, my Mike is very cool,” the girl who’d been in the back with him stated in defense.

“Thanks El. I have to research mythology, folklore, history. It’s not just all make-believe. Some of this is based on legends that have been passed down through generations. I also have to research weaponry and battle tactics. It’s not just as simple as sitting down and typing.”

“Okay, okay,” Lucas chuckled, holding up his hands. “You know we’re just messing with you, man. We’re all going to be celebrating right along with you when you become the next great author.”

“Yeah,” Robin piped in. “We’ll throw you a party with balloons and everything.”

“You guys are jerks,” Mike muttered but there was just a hint of a smile on his face as he said it, letting you know that they were all just messing around.

“So, you must be Y/N,” Max said, stepping into you, offering her hand which you took in another handshake. Did everyone here already know who you were? “Sorry about that. Quite a way to meet all of us. But in case you missed it, I’m Max. That’s my husband, Lucas. That’s Mike and his wife El.”

“Nice to meet you.”

The new foursome looked to be about the same age as Dustin. Had Steve babysat all of these guys? There were hugs all around and then Dustin was helping Mike haul in what looked to be dishes for the cookout. That reminded you and you opened the back door, pulling out a foil covered tray.

“Oh, you didn’t need to bring anything,” Steve commented.

“I wanted to. I mean, isn’t it customary when you’re invited to a cookout to bring something?”

“What did you bring?” asked Robin eagerly.

“I baked some lemon bars,” you answered with a shrug. “Nothing fancy but they’re Eli’s favorite.”

“Ohh! Yummy. I love lemon. It’s just such a fun flavor, you know? It makes me think of sunny summer days or really clean stuff. My mom loved lemon Pledge when I was a kid and after she cleaned the house, the whole place smelled like lemon.”

“Alright Robin, how about we all head inside?” Steve offered with an amused snort. They all made their way toward the house and Steve hung back, walking alongside you. “Sorry about all of this. My friends can be a bit…well, much when you first meet them.”

“I think they’re wonderful,” you assured him with a smile. “Seriously. I love how close you all are.”

“How do you know we’re close when all you saw was us picking on Mike?”

“Oh, the way you all just banter back and forth. But it’s just that, innocent teasing. To a casual observer it may appear that you all annoy each other but you really only pick apart the ones you love the most. And you all do it with a smile. I can just tell.”

“Have excellent skills of observation, do you?” he asked, those hazel eyes soft like the caramel in the middle of a chocolate.

“I like to think so.”

“Okay.” His hand fell on your arm, stopping you just outside the door as the others went in, leaving the two of you on the porch. “So, tell me oh keen observer, what do you notice about me?”

You paused, your heart fluttering in your chest because you noticed everything about him. You noticed the way his hand always ran through his hair when he was nervous. You noticed how his eyes couldn’t just be described as hazel, how they shifted like a mood ring, sometimes more gold or more green or more brown. You noticed how soft his face went whenever he spoke about his son. You noticed how calloused his fingers were from his time spent doing manual labor. You weren't sure there was anything you hadn’t noticed about him. He had completely consumed your thoughts ever since that moment he turned around at the ball field.

“Okay. You’re a hopeless romantic even though things didn’t turn out right for you. You haven’t let it jade you. You still believe that you’ll find your happily ever after. You know the divorce was the right thing but you worry sometimes that it is going to affect Jeremiah in some long lasting way. Your parents never divorced and you think they should have because their dysfunctional relationship had an awful impact on you. But you can’t help wondering if you’re doomed to screw up with your son because you never had a role model to show you how to do it correctly. Neither of those things should you worry about by the way because I have also noticed that you are an amazing dad. There’s nothing you wouldn’t do for your son and he is one of the happiest, most well-adjusted kids I have ever seen. You are giving, almost to a fault. You would bleed yourself dry for the people you care about until you had nothing left. You don’t ever stop to take care of yourself because you’re too worried about other people. And you are absolutely infuriating because you don’t seem to have a flaw. You just seem to be about as perfect as a guy can be.”

You inhaled a deep breath, watching his face, wondering if you'd said too much. You hoped you hadn’t offended him in any way. None of what you said was meant to be an insult. You thought everything about him was commendable. He’d had a tough childhood but he hadn’t let it turn him bitter. His marriage had failed but he still had hope that he could find his person and that was beautiful. To still have hope in the face of defeat was a lovely thing and something a lot of people couldn’t hold onto once life had knocked them down a couple times.

His lips pursed into a tight smile, his eyes looking off to the side before coming back to you, “Trust me, I’m not perfect. I mean, you’re not wrong about anything you said except for that. Anyone in that house right now would be happy to list my many flaws for you if you asked.”

“Like what?” you challenged because so far, you hadn’t been able to find a single one.

“Well, I can be really overprotective. Robin and Dustin get very annoyed when I meddle in their lives.”

“That just means you care a lot and you want what’s best for the people you love,” you shrugged. “Sorry, not really a flaw. Try again.”

“I’m really insecure,” he stated. “I’m always questioning everything I do. I didn’t used to be that way. I used to be arrogant as hell. I never doubted myself but now I doubt myself all the time. I doubt myself as a parent. I definitely doubt myself with women.”

“That just means you’re open to learning and being better. None of us have it all down. You think I don’t doubt myself as a parent on a daily basis? We all do. And dating? Forget it. I haven’t dated anyone since before Justin. I have no idea what I’m doing. We’re all just learning as we go and trying to be the best versions of ourselves we can be. Not a flaw, Steve. It just means you’re human.”

“Okay, well, how about the fact that I married the wrong girl and stayed with her for way too long?”

“You’re loyal,” you shrugged. “Maybe to a fault but you tried. You tried everything you could to make it work because that’s who you are. You didn’t want to let her down. You didn’t want to just walk away and give up. You still care about her and have a good relationship with her. Do you know how incredible that is? That you saw the mistake, recognized it, rectified it, and then did what was right by your son?”

“You know, you’re going to give me an ego problem. I already had one of those. It didn’t end well for me. I work really hard to stay humble and that could prove difficult when you’re telling me I’m perfect.”

“You, Steve Harrington, are perfectly imperfect. You recognize your weaknesses, you work hard to be better, and you do everything in your power to make sure the people you love are happy. Even I will admit no one is perfect but you’re pretty damn close.”

“You think so?” The words barely a whisper as he leaned into you, his lips a breath away from yours. “Because I think…”

“What the hell are you two doing out here?” Dustin huffed as he threw open the door again. “I thought we were all here for a cookout.”

Steve’s eyes rolled, his head falling back and you had the distinct impression that he was annoyed you'd been interrupted. You couldn’t say you didn’t feel the same way. Your lips tingled, yearning for something that hadn’t happened. You were pretty sure he’d come really close to kissing you again but the universe didn’t seem to want it to happen, regardless of what you wanted.

____________________________________________________________

“Men never really grow up, do they?” Robin mused from her spot in the chair next to you.

You were sitting on Steve’s deck, relaxing with a glass of wine after a dinner of barbecued chicken, corn on the cob, grilled red potatoes, and a salad. It was delicious. The chicken had been just blackened enough without being burnt, the barbecue sauce caramelizing delectably. Steve was definitely a good cook, just one more little check on the perfection side for him while the opposite side sat blank.

“Not really,” you laughed, watching as Mike, Dustin, and Jeremiah chased Steve, Lucas, and Eli, all of them armed with Nerf guns, Miles bounding behind them all as if he didn’t know which team he belonged to but he wanted to be a part of it. “My husband…Justin, he was just a big child at heart. The Christmas after Eli was born he bought him three lego sets for Christmas. I commented how silly it was because he was only nine months old. But he really bought them for himself. It gave him an excuse to get the toys so he could play with them and build them.”

“Lucas is like a baby,” Max chimed in. “He whines if I don’t give him enough attention. Seriously, you should have seen him a few months ago. I had this big case, a woman accused of murdering her husband. I was working really long hours and he would whine about how he was missing his Max time.”

“That’s sweet though,” you told her, taking a sip of your wine, the bubbles dancing pleasantly along your tongue. “He missed you.”

“It’s annoying,” Max snorted, but then her face softened as she rolled her eyes. “But yeah, he is pretty sweet. I guess I’ll keep him for a while.”

“How about Mike?” you asked, leaning forward toward El.

“Oh, Mike is definitely a manchild. He plays video games all the time and his friends still come over to play DnD. I kind of thought he would grow out of it but he hasn’t. They still have DnD night every single Thursday.” She shrugged, grabbing an olive from the bowl on the table and popping it in her mouth. Leaning back, she tucked her legs underneath her. “But it works out because then Max and I have girls night every week.”

“I love girls night. My friend, Janice, and I try to do them every once in a while but that’s been harder since…” you broke off, unsure if any of them knew about what had happened to Justin.

“Since your husband passed?” asked Robin gently, her hand coming to rest on your arm. “Jeremiah told Steve that Eli’s dad went to heaven. I’m so sorry. That had to be awful for you.”

“It was. It…wasn’t expected. He wasn’t sick or anything. He was a Marine. He was stationed in Somalia for a humanitarian mission. It was supposed to be peaceful. He said it was nothing to worry about because they were only going over there to help. There was no fighting. He wasn’t supposed to…” You ran a hand over your mouth, willing yourself to keep it together in front of these people you'd only met a couple hours ago. “Anyway, I don’t know all of the details. Of course not. I’m not a soldier so I’m not allowed to. But there was some civil strife, locals who didn’t like American involvement, and he was caught in the crossfire.”

“Jesus,” Max whispered. “How long ago?”

“It’s been a little over two years now. Eli was five when it happened. They send people to your door to deliver the news.” You cleared your throat, eyes scanning the sky, emotions raging to get through that you were battling back with everything you had. “Two people in uniform knock on your door and trust me, when you’re married to someone in the military, you know what that means. They show up and send a wrecking ball straight through the middle of your life. He…he was sent home and we were able to have a funeral. I was told I should consider myself lucky because some people only get to bury an empty coffin or…pieces.”

“Oh my god,” gasped El, her hand covering her mouth.

“I couldn’t find any luck in what had happened. I was left a widow, a single mother…alone. My son was left fatherless. I went into a dark place for a while and if it hadn't been for my friend, Janice, I don’t know if I would have made it out of the other side. That little boy right there…” You pointed to Eli, tears glistening in your eyes. “He’s the only thing that really forced me to keep going. I knew he needed me.” Your palms pressed into your eyes, pressing the tears down and away. You took a long drink of your wine before releasing a forced laugh. “Anyway, what a horribly depressing topic of conversation. Let’s talk about someone else, please. El! Mike is writing a book? That has to be exciting.”

“I don’t know if exciting is the word. He’s been working on it for the past five years,” she groaned. “He works part-time at the local bookstore but if it weren’t for my job, we wouldn’t be able to pay the bills. I want to support him. I know this book means a lot to him but I did not think it would take up this much time in our lives.”

“Why hasn’t he sent it out yet?” asked Robin. “Hasn’t he had it finished for a year?”

“He says he’s still polishing it. Honestly, I think he can’t get out of his own head. I think he’s scared to send it because he’s scared of getting rejected.”

You leaned forward to set your empty wineglass on the table, “I get that. Rejection is terrifying and he will probably get a lot of them. Most authors don’t sell their books to the first person they send it to. Some of them get a hundred rejections before they find the publisher who is willing to take a chance on them. But he’s never going to know if he doesn’t take the leap. Have you talked to him about it?”

“Kind of.” She cringed, shaking her head. “Not really. I want to support him, you know. I don’t want to push him but I’m really tired of having to work all the overtime I can just to keep us afloat. I feel like I’m paddling a sinking boat while he’s just sitting in the back trying to enjoy the ride.”

“Then tell him that. You shouldn’t be the only one supporting you two. You supported him while he worked on his dream. It’s done now so he needs to bite the bullet and see what happens. And in the meantime, he needs to start working more hours to help out. You can tell him how you’re feeling without bashing him and you can still support him while expecting him to do his part too.”

El smiled, “Thanks. You’re pretty smart about relationship stuff.”

“Well, I was married for eight years. I don’t know. I always found open communication was the way to go. Men are not mind readers. They cannot begin to fathom the amount of emotions or thoughts that race through us every single day. When I just told Justin what I was thinking or how I was feeling, he always tried to do what he could. Hiding your feelings isn’t going to help anything. Just put it out there. What’s the worst that could happen?”

Robin smirked, “Well, in that case, let me send some honesty your way.” Leaning in, she propped her elbows on her knees, wineglass held between both of her hands. “That guy over there?” Her eyes flitted to where Steve was lifting Eli over his head as the boy giggled. “He may be a dingus but you’d be hard pressed to find a better guy than him.”

“I never said Steve wasn’t a good guy,” you stated, your stomach twisting, wondering where this was going.

“I know. But he likes you. I mean, he really likes you and he’s too much of a chicken shit to say it so I’m going to say it for him. Because that guy, he deserves the world. He deserves everything good and wonderful. He deserves true love, happy endings, and all that romantic shit. And meeting you, I can see why he likes you.”

“I don’t understand. I mean, we’ve been hanging out but only because Eli and Jeremiah are friends and they want to spend time together.”

Max snorted into her wine, “You really think he’s been hanging out with you just so the boys can spend time together? Please. Steve wears his heart on his sleeve, okay? He’s been inviting you to everything because he wants to see you.”

“When he talks about you, his face gets all glowy,” El grinned. “He definitely likes you. And Steve, well he’s not had the best luck when it comes to women.”

“Because he picks wrong,” Robin added, “but this time, I don’t think he has. Now, I know you have a complicated past and I don’t know where you’re at as far as being ready for something serious. And I like you. I really like you. I think you’d be great for him but please, don’t start anything with him if you’re not ready to be all in. Because that man has been through more than his fair share of heartbreak and I don’t know that I can stand to watch him go through it again.”

“Yeah, the whole divorce with Nance really fucked with his head,” Max sighed. “It made him question everything, knowing that he’d tried to stick it out for so long with someone who was wrong for him. Then his choices after that were just all bad. He’s lost a lot of confidence. That King Steve swagger has been long gone for a while. The last girl was super clingy and asked him to move in after only a few months.”

“Oh! Janet. She was, like, creepy stalker obsessed,” El exclaimed. “She still asks me about him all the time when she comes into the grocery store. She is super convinced they’re soulmates. I’m telling you, that woman is not right.”

“No, she’s not but my point is, just don’t make him your rebound guy, okay?” Robin requested, bringing the conversation back on point. “He deserves so much more than that. And I haven’t seen him look like this when he’s talking about a girl in…” She paused, lips pursing. “Honestly, I don’t think I’ve ever seen him look like this. So, you’re obviously special to him and because of that, I think you have the capacity to absolutely shatter him. Just make sure you’re ready before you dive into anything.”

“I…uh…yeah, obviously,” you stammered, a flash of heat, like standing in front of an oven, suddenly racing over your body. Shit. You were about to have an anxiety attack right here in front of all these people. “We’re not even…I wouldn’t…I…you know what? I need to use the bathroom. I…”

“Are you okay?” asked El, concerned.

“Fine. I just…I’ll be back…”

You stumbled through the house, past the kitchen, the living room, and finally into the bathroom. Your hands pressed against the door, pushing firmly, trying to focus on the feel of the wood underneath your skin. Dampness clung to your skin as you looked around frantically, focusing on the pattern in the backsplash above the sink, blues swirling with greens. Your hand reached for the faucet, turning it on, closing your eyes, allowing the sound of the water running to clear your head. You wiggled your fingers, pressed your middle finger and thumb together, feeling the pressure as you felt your muscles relax, your breathing slow, your heart rate come down.

“Jesus Christ, get it together,” you muttered to yourself.

What were you doing? What were you thinking? Even his friends thought this was a bad idea. You couldn’t tell Steve that you liked him. What if you hurt him? What if you were so broken that you couldn’t give him what he needed? What if you thought you were sure but you weren't and then it all went wrong? No one could be certain of anything. Nothing was guaranteed in life. You knew that better than anybody.

Cupping your hands, you collected water and splashed it onto your face to cool your body. Opening your eyes, you jolted when you caught sight of yourself in the mirror, rivers of black running down both cheeks. Grabbing onto Steve’s hand towel, you ran it under your eyes.

“Shit! Oh my god!”

The towel was cream and now it was covered in streaks of your mascara. Your eyes darted around the bathroom. For what, you had no idea. You stuck the towel under the water, attempting to rub at the streaks with your fingers but that only made it worse. Now they weren’t just streaks but massive black blobs covering the fabric.

“Hey,” came Steve’s voice from the other side of the door and you jumped, knocking the toothbrush holder into the sink.

“Jesus!” you yelped, picking it up, placing it back.

“Are you alright in there?”

“I’m fine! I’m fine. I just…I…”

With a groan, you unlocked the door and pulled it open, holding his towel out to him. He looked down at it and then back up at you, obviously confused as to why you were offering him a soaking wet towel and you burst into tears.

“I’m sorry. I was…I was hot and I just wanted to wet my face but then my mascara ran and I didn’t know and I wiped my face on your towel and then it got on it and I tried to wash it out but I only made it worse and now your towel is ruined and I’m a mess and I…”

“Whoa. Whoa,” he said softly and then he was taking the towel and he was holding you. One hand cupping the back of your head, the other on the middle of your back. His thumb ran soothingly up and down the back of your neck and your eyes slipped closed, sinking into the feeling of being held, being taken care of. “It’s just a towel. I don’t care about a towel. I care about you. Are you alright, honey?”

He wanted to know if you were okay. He cared about you. And did he just call you honey? Was he kidding right now? Did he have to make it even harder to walk away from the possibility of him? All you wanted to do was curl up in his arms and allow him to carry it for a while. All the pain, all the exhaustion, all the uncertainty. Just let someone else ease your burden for a bit but that wasn’t fair to him. His friends had made it clear to you that you were the last thing he needed in his life. You would only bring complications.

Steve deserved someone who could give them their whole heart and you couldn’t. You weren't even sure you had any to give. Justin had taken so much of it with him and all you had left was for your son. This man was too good to only get pieces and that was all you could offer.

“I’m fine,” you assured him, placing your hands against his chest, pushing back gently. “I’m good, really.” You wiped at your eyes with the backs of your hands, trying to laugh it off. “I don’t know. Just an emotional day. It happens to me sometimes.”

“You sure?” Those eyes. You felt like those eyes could see you in a way no one else had. When Steve looked at you it felt as if he could read right down to your very soul. “The girls said you looked like you might be having an anxiety attack or something. They were worried, wanted me to come in and check on you.”

“I was.” Sometimes honesty was the best policy. Maybe if he knew how entirely messed up you were, he wouldn’t be so interested anymore. “It happens, since my husband…I see a therapist and I have tools for it. I know what to do. I’m fine now. I’m just sorry I made everybody worry and destroyed your towel. I can buy you a new one.”

“Fuck the towel, seriously,” he scoffed. “I was just worried about you. Is there anything I can do?”

“No. Thanks for checking on me but really, I’m fine.” You put on the best smile you could muster, holding your hands out to the side. “See? All good now. We should really get back to the fun, yeah?”

“I don’t know how much fun is happening. Mike just busted out the cornhole boards…”

“Cornhole!?” you exclaimed, probably a little too excitedly. “I love cornhole! Let’s go!”

“You love cornhole?” Steve questioned as if questioning your sanity.

“Of course. What midwesterner doesn’t love a good game of cornhole?”

“I mean…me? It’s okay, I guess.”

“Oh what? Not challenging enough for Mr. I played every sport imaginable? It doesn’t quite have the excitement of shooting a ball into a net or hearing that crack when the bat hits the ball?”

“Not really. I mean, yeah, I like to win but…I actually wanted to ask you…”

“Later! Cornhole!”

No. Nope. You were not giving him the opportunity to ask you anything. You turned, hurrying through the house as he rushed behind you. Sliding the glass door open, you stepped onto the deck, greeting everyone’s worried face with a bright smile. You were fine. This was fine. Everything was going to be fine.

“Hey, we were worried when you ran off like that,” Max said, eyebrows knitting together. “You okay?”

“Did you get attacked, mommy?” asked Eli.

“Attacked? Who’s attacking her in Steve’s house?” asked Mike.

Dustin shrugged, “You never know. Steve, did you attack her?”

“What? No. Obviously I didn’t attack her!”

“I didn’t get attacked,” you sighed.

“Then why would Eli ask if someone attacked you? Do you get attacked often?” questioned Max.

“My mommy’s feelings attack her,” Eli explained. Oh, sweet, sweet boy, but you really wished he’d stop talking. “Her heart goes super fast and she can’t breathe and she has to look at stuff and listen to stuff.”

Mike frowned. “Her feelings attack her?”

“It’s an anxiety attack, dingus,” Robin huffed, smacking him in the chest.

“Ow!” Mike protested, rubbing his shirt. “That hurt. Excuse me for not knowing what that meant. I pictured a bunch of emotions chasing her down and beating her with a stick.”

“Oh…we should add something like that to one of our campaigns,” Dustin grinned. “Imagine, you drink a potion or have a spell cast on you that sends your emotions outside of your body. It gives them corporeal form and they start attacking and you have to figure out how to battle them back or…no! You have to figure out how to control them to make them go away. Oh, that’s some existential shit right there.”

“Dustin!” Lucas shouted. “Maybe not the time. She’s clearly having a breakdown.”

“I am not breaking down. I’m fine,” you protested.

“Isn’t that what an anxiety attack is? Should we call an ambulance? Are you like completely losing it?”

“Jesus Christ,” growled Robin. “She’s obviously okay now. An anxiety attack is not a complete mental break you idiots. It’s something that happens in response to stressors around you. Your heart pounds, you get dizzy, you shake, you get hot.” She stopped, turning to you. “Wait. It happened right after we…” Robin’s eyes moved from Max to El and then back to you. “Oh shit. Did we cause…what we said…is this our fault?”

“What? No!” This was the last thing you needed. You barely knew these people. “No. You were just looking out for your friend. I get that. It wasn’t you. It…”

“What do you mean looking out for their friend?” asked Steve. When your eyes went wide and you didn’t answer, he stepped into Robin. “What does she mean? What did you chuckleheads say?”

“Nothing,” squeaked Robin and when he glared, she flinched. “Okay, fine. I may have told her that you like her and that I just wanted her to be sure before she started anything with you because I don’t want to see you hurt.”

“Steve, we were just looking out for you,” El added. “We know how rough you’ve had it with relationships. We didn’t want to see you get hurt.”

“We know after Nance you haven’t trusted yourself. You’ve chosen wrong every single time. I mean, you dated that complete whackadoo, Janet, and look how that ended. You almost had to get a restraining order. She’s still obsessed with you.”

“You like my mommy?” asked Eli, his eyes lighting up. “He likes my mommy!”

Jeremiah shrugged, “I already knew that. I wanted to know if she likes my daddy.”

“She does. She told me in the car that he’s wonderful but she didn’t know if he liked her back but he does! So now they can go on a date!”

Oh my god. This was awful. This was your worst nightmare come to life. You reached out, grabbing onto the back of a chair as you listened to the myriad of voices around you. You weren't even sure you wanted to have this conversation with Steve. In fact, you'd convinced yourself not to and now they were all having it without you, whether you wanted them to or not.

“Jesus, Robin! Are you kidding me? I know you like to meddle in my life but this is insane, even for you!”

“Steve, it’s not insane. And look, her kid just said she likes you. So, why don’t you two stop dancing around each other and just go get coffee already like I told you before. I didn’t tell her not to date you. I like her. I just don’t want you to be her rebound from her dead husband.”

Weights pressing on your chest. Your hands grasped at your clothing, pulling, desperate to loosen the pressure.

“Oh my god!” Max shrieked. “Robin, you can’t just say that like that.”

“I’m sorry! I’m panicking! I say stupid shit when I’m panicking!”

No. Not now. This couldn’t happen now. The world was spiraling, spinning, one hazy blur and you couldn’t find a single thing to focus on. Forget trying to listen to anything when the sounds of their yelling were filling your head completely.

“You always say stupid shit!” yelled Steve.

“But my daddy did die. It’s okay to say it,” Eli piped in.

“We know your daddy passed away but there could have been a gentler way of putting it,” Max told him.

There was no air. Your chest was painful, a python constricting and squeezing around you until you couldn’t breathe.

“Maybe but my point was that you two need to stop acting like shy teenagers with a crush and just go out and bang each other already because you’re not fooling anybody. We can all see how much you want each other.”

“What’s banging?” asked Jeremiah.

“I don’t think they should do that. That doesn’t sound very nice,” Eli disagreed.

“Jesus Robin!” growled Steve.

The entire backyard swam around you, the green of the grass blending into the brown of the fence, the blue of the sky. You couldn’t breathe. You opened your mouth wide, hoping for precious oxygen to make its way where you needed it to but nothing was happening. You couldn’t do this. The entire backyard shrunk down to a single pinprick of light and then the world went black.

Chapter 8

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imagine-a-life-like-this · 3 months

Text

Accidentally In Enemies : Teaser (S.CB)

Word Count : 0.7k

Warnings : break up, heartbreak, mention of stalking (jokingly), swearing

The next couple weeks seemed to go by the same. She followed her routine, taking everything day by day. San and his new girlfriend seemed to be everywhere. She tried not to notice them, but it was as if her eyes could only see them. As if they knew when they were nearby and immediately searched for them even in crowded rooms. To her, they stuck out. As if they had an aura around them.

And Changbin. Changbin was always there, covering her eyes, turning her away, telling her not to look at them. If she just read between the lines, she could see that he was begging for her to only look at him. Looking at her with so much love in his eyes, it overflowed into his gentle touch, overflowed into the way he’d tuck her hair behind her ears, smiling at her. Overflowed into the way he’d carry her groceries to his car so she wouldn’t have to take the bus home. Even carry them into her place so she wouldn’t hurt herself.

She tried not to think about it. Thinking of all the little things Changbin does for her would send her into a spiral. Wondering why. Overthinking all their interactions from high school on. Maybe she read him wrong. Maybe he wasn’t the asshole she had painted him to be in her mind.

“Again? Are you stalking him or something?” Changbin chuckled as he turned her towards him. And she remembered who he really was. All the nice things he’s done could never outweigh the bad.

“Are you stalking me?” She questioned back. Changbin just laughed as he shook his head. He couldn’t help but think about how cute she looked. Staring at him with her arms crossed and a small pout on her face. She could never look angry, no matter how hard she tried. He wanted to tell her how cute he found her, but he bit his tongue. Like he did every time affectionate words crawled up his throat. No matter how hard he tried, he just couldn’t bring himself to say the words he wanted to.

“Y/n, Changbin, hey.” Both of them were so caught up in each other, they didn’t notice San making his way towards them. His smile was wide as he looked between the two. Y/n tried to greet him back but no words came out. She hasn’t seen him up close in over a month. She almost forgot just how pretty he was. Changbin noticed, his smile slightly faltering. She still wasn’t over him.

“Hey.” Changbin responded. He hated the way San looked so happy while Y/n looked so broken. He tried so hard to block San from Y/n’s view so she wouldn’t see how happy he was, but it was impossible to do when he stood right in front of her, as if showing off his new found happiness. Changbin noticed her eyes glancing towards San’s new girlfriend, so clearly comparing herself to her.

He wanted so badly to hold her, whisper in her ear that to him, she was so much prettier. That he loved her little quirks he knows she hates. The flaws she sees just makes her more ethereal to him. As if she wasn’t real. A figment of his imagination. Someone he made up. Created in his mind as his perfect girlfriend. As if he could reach out and his hand would go right through her.

“I always knew there was something more than hatred between you two.” San smiled. Y/n’s eyes widened, which made San chuckle. “I thought it was just sexual tension, but you two look really good together.” Changbin wrapped his arm around her waist, bringing her closer to him, his thumb gently rubbing her side, which comforted her, grounded her. She focused on the feeling of his thumb rather than the feeling of her heart breaking again.

“Seeing her sad after you broke up with her really helped me pull my head out of my ass. I never want to see her sad again.” Y/n looked to Changbin. He met her eyes, giving her a soft smile. She didn’t need to know that’s how he really felt. He could pretend that he was just putting on an act.

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machineheraldandy · 4 months

Text

RETROFANG: talking about the ship

Xina Kwan x Miguel o’hara

For the 1992-1995 spiderman 2099 comics, and the world of tomorrow 2099 comics that followed.

Welcome back to me rambling in a way that probably doesn’t make sense

Miguel x Xina is one of my comfort ships, something I love, it’s flawed, but beautiful, it tells a story that the writers no longer want to show which is upsetting, it’s flawed loved of two people who care for each other deeply but cannot bring themself to be together, one is self destructive, while one seeks for ways to help. A relationship to its core doomed to fail.

The first time we ever see Xina is when she is that of what we can assume to be around 12-13, both her and Miguel were young students attending school together, two people that would later stick together and not befriend anyone else that we can see, and from the very starts it’s love at first sight for Miguel, you can see with the way it’s drawn to the plot that falls that Miguel falls instantly In love, and it can be argued that Xina also fell in love, or at least let Miguel flirt without being uncomfortable. He gives her a glance, and turns his head to follow her as she does the same before they officially talk.

Later on it’s straight away to flirting, asking to go to the pool, a possible sign of trying to get what a child may consider a date in a way. They spend the rest of their school years friends, and helping each other, it appears that even if both In love, they decided to take it slow, become friends, then best friends, then lovers, a way to build up a healthy and trusting relationship, a relationship that shows Miguel waited years to be with Xina, waited years for her.

This is what I consider deep love, a love that movie, craved but also feared, a love he had to destroy in order to destroy himself

The next time we see Miguel with Xina is when he is moving into his alchemax apartment (it appears), which due to the way we assume Xina is, and how she is in general, even if she went to an Alchemax school, she doesn’t really like Alchemax, yet would do things in support of Miguel working there, she saw flaws in his design and yet hang on, because she loved him, it’s then hinted that they of course did it, but it also shows one of Miguel’s biggest flaws when it comes to Xina, he loves her, but waits too long to learn about her. In later times he learns what she likes, what she does, but here it’s shown that he didn’t even known his best friend had gotten a tattoo of her favourite real life person, something he would have known because they are seen to be best friends that stick together.

Which brings up the issue and possibly why their relationship ended so soon, yes Miguel definitely found Dana attractive, and was emotionally cheating in front of Xina, but at his core he wasn’t ready to be a good partner, he wasn’t ready for a healthy commitment, he couldn’t even properly care for what Xina loved, even after knowing her since they were basically pre-teens. Miguel was not a good man at this time, he’s he waited for Xina for years, but he was too much of a bad person to hold onto her after finally getting her,

You also take into consideration that he is self destructive, he loves Xina more than anything and therefore he had to destroy it fast, he had to find another fast to destroy what he had, he had waited years for a woman, he has her, now he has to get rid of her in a way she will never want him back, how does he do that? Cheating. Emotionally first, and then physically.

When we end up seeing them again it’s because LYLA is broken, LYLA who resembled Xina in the way of it being based off of her tattoo, Miguel doesn’t care for Marilyn Monroe herself, he cares for the fact she is xinas tattoo, hence him only now caring for xina’s interests, caring too late. He becomes desperate to fix her because she is in his way a way to be close to Xina without havent to be near her, he loves Xina, but he can’t return, he messed it up too much on purpose. Though that ends fast as he soon learns that the best person to go to, to fix LYLA is Xina, which could possibly also be seen as an excuse to see Xina again. Once let in the first thing he does is go to her bedroom, to remember the old times, to live in the past, the past he craves but can’t get anymore.

You also see that Xina who is still single and assumed to have stayed single after Miguel, still loves and misses him, her bedside photo is them together. She loves him, she wants him, but she hates him as of now.

Within this time we also see Jack, Xinas Android, Miguel mistakes him for a partner, and seems to be almost jealous, upset. More signs he still loves her even if engaged to Dana, you also see Xina making it clear she doesn’t want him there and hates him, but she doesn’t kick him out, and it’s clear as much as she was uncomfortable, she cared enough to listen, cared enough to help, and of course we know this was going to happen, as even if she claims she just wanted to see him “crawling back” as a joke, it’s clear from the photo in her room, that she wanted him back deeply.

When she talks to Miguel many things are clear, one she is lying about things and two she is desperate to be the one he needs the most, even if she doesn’t want to make that clear.

She lies when talking about why they dated she claims it’s because she felt sorry for Miguel, but once again her photo in her room proves that wrong, along side the fact that she caught Miguel cheating as she came home early to be with him and to make him happy, she deeply cared for him, it was never about his dad, it was always about their love.

You also see how she is almost trying to push him away and is mocking his fiancé, Miguel doesn’t stop her, almost as if he wants her to insult Dana, because truthfully he doesn’t care for Dana the way he should, he cares for her as he loves her as she is what he considered dumb, someone that can’t question him, someone that blindly follows. Yet he sees Xina as smart, independent, and important to him, he loves that about her, yet is also scared about that. Because it means she can help him see his errors, and he doesn’t want to be shown, he wants to remain blind

Next one I want to talk about is this comic panel, you see that Miguel is finally caring for her interests, he is taking the time to get her real old things such as a gumball machine, because he knows she loves it, he is caring enough finally, he knows what she likes, what she want, why she wants it, he cared for her deeply and after years is finally showing it. Only now

next bit in this panel Miguel mentions the fact he was going to end it, he directly tells Xina he is planning to end it in a way, and Xina instead of making a joke, instead of being her nasty self she has been a few times, instead asks him to join her on a trip. Alone. She cares for him enough that she is literally wanting to spend time alone with him as a way to possibly keep him alive but to also reconnect, something that shows her deep love for him, and deep need for him, and also just the fact she is a great friend. These are two people stuck in a bad world they suffer in that still care for each other deeply.

(NO image as I don’t feel comfortable with that)

SA mention

I am bringing up a scene we end up seeing soon into their trip together, a flashback to Kron attempting to harm Xina, this is poorly written and used as a way to show Miguel and Leon’s hate for each other, they directly use Xina getting SA’ED as a way to push two boys fighting. This is no doubt disgusting writing.

But in the sight of this being about Miguel and Xina it has to be bought up in the way that Xina would put himself in danger, and put his family at risk, risk being abused by George, risk loosing everything, risk possibly even being killed by George, to keep Xina safe, he before now refused to fight back, refused to lay a finger on Kron as he was scared for himself and his family. He was frightened, yet he risked it all for Xina. He did at a point nearly bail on Xina, he was scared the worse would happen to him, but in the end he Kepler her. He kept her safe, even if it was poorly written and should have been shown in a different way that didn’t make a man the savour of a woman facing SA

Nor that’s over we get into the venom arc, the arc where Kron as venom attacks Xina and Dana to get to Miguel, something that reveals Miguel’s even deeper connection to Xina, he out of impulse screams for Xina, he is more worried for her, though he is still very worried for Dana, in this he has to save both, he only successfully saves Xina, and Dana passes away, this isn’t used for shipping Xina and Miguel, in fact Xina ends up leaving. This is shown as a way to show their friendship only, they don’t get together, as they both mentally can’t, Miguel lost his fiancé even if he wasn’t the best partner, and Xina had survivors guilt, she hates herself for hating the woman that slept with her boyfriend, a woman who hates her interests (shown by how she hates Gabriel’s retro interests) she so ends up leaving, I can argue that this was the best ending for the comic, until Miguel and Xina returned later. They both weren’t mentally stable, they both yes loved each other, but they would have ruined each other if they tried again.

The next time we see Xina is when she is happy to see Miguel, even slightly seeming to mess around, she cares for Miguel still, and Miguel still cares for her, but she has seemed to move on, she doesn’t care for a relationship, she has a job to do, people to help, and tech to work on, but yet she is still close to Miguel, she still holds onto Miguel, she still in a way loves him, even if as of now that love is platonic, and the same can be said for Miguel, he is trying to find Gabriel, he doesn’t have time for trying to get with Xina,on top of that but they only see each other for what can be assumed to be less than 24/7’S, they aren’t ready to try again, it’s too quick, and the story handles that well, it doesn’t make them a couple, it makes them friends, who still may have feelings for each other.

In the end they end up leaving, Xina just had her best friend did, and Miguel still needs to find Gabriel, they never end up together, from there on Xina stops showing up, she doesn’t appear in canon at all, she is gone from Miguel’s life, if we don’t count time storm a non canon story; it has been nearly I believe 27 years since she was last since.

It is a bitter sweet ending to her story, and she doesn’t get seen again, but it’s also a bittersweet ending to Miguel’s orginal love life for 2099, after that they force him into Peter Parker’s love interests within stories, or he gets tempest from the past, not his time, which I still love, she just isn’t from comics I read. For the year 2099, for the future Miguel has no life without Xina, he is stuck literally and metaphorically in the past.

I would love to Xina come back, she is considered Miguel’s MJ, the endgame, the person he loves more than anything, and really when you see the writing, when you see what was done, that is completely true, it was written that they were doomed lovers, but they could easily become good partners with time and effort, and if Miguel stops being self destructive

In the end they didn’t work due to Miguel’s self harm, and due to the fact Xina wouldn’t deal with what which is good for her. But if Miguel gets therapy…maybe. They could work.

Over all good doomed lover plot, painful for everyone that wanted them together forever such as myself

But in a non canon comic when Miguel is mentally more stable, him and her are married, and ended up growing old together :)

#Xina Kwan #Miguel o’hara #spiderman 2099 #world of tomorrow #world of tomorrow 2099 #Xina Kwan 2099 #spiderman 2099 1992 #Retrofang #xinamiguel #xinamig #analysis #talk #rambling #doomed lovers #they could be not doomed if Miguel got therapy

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idyllicwillowtree · 1 year

Text

Vickie's Friend - Part 2

Genre: Steve Harrington x fem!reader

Summary: You and Steve are both very protective of your friends.

Word count: 3K

Warnings: use of y/n, silly goose!Steve, fluff, trying not to out somebody

Author’s note: Sorry this took so long! I got some of the inspo from an episode of Friends

Main Masterlist

Part 1

Saturday, March 22, 1986

“I mean, it’s hilarious! I could never place what Tammy Thompson sounded like but Robin got it spot on,” Vickie enthused.

“Yeah, it’s a Muppet joke. The muppets are always funny,” you replied, focusing more on the stack of new books you were arranging on the shelf. Vickie twirled around the bookstore you both worked at, following you as you did most of the work.

“My point is that when I compared Tammy to Kermit the Frog she laughed. And not like a fake laugh either, like a real, genuine laugh. It was perfect.”

“But…?” you waved the book in your hand, gesturing for her to continue.

“But I’ve been trying really hard to stop that thing where my mouth moves faster than my brain so there was just that weird awkward silence you get when you want to keep talking with the person but you don't know what to say but I had like a million things I wanted to say but I suppressed the shit out of that so I wouldn’t keep talking and talking and talking and I’m doing it right now, aren’t I?” Vickie gasped slightly, forgetting to breathe during her run on sentence.

Sending your friend a tight lipped smile, you say, “yeah, you are.”

“I’m hopeless,” Vickie exhales and leans against the bookshelf you were organizing.

“Eh,” you turn to lean next to her, “we both are.”

“If only we could like, combine,” Vickie said, intertwining her own fingers together.

“Combine?”

“Just think about it. I know exactly what I want, and I’ve found the girl of my dreams, but I can't get the courage to ask her out. Meanwhile, you go on a million dates and you have no idea what you want. So if we just combined, all our problems would be solved.”

She was right, you had gone on what felt like a million first dates with no plans for a second one in sight. Unfortunately, Vickie is forgetting a crucial flaw in her hypothetical plan.

“Vickie?”

“Yeah?”

“Did you forget about Dan again?”

Your best friend’s face dropped as she blinked rapidly at you. “Right…Dan…”

“It’s alright, Vick. As long as you break up with him before you and Robin do anything, you’re good,” you say with a teasing smile.

“Robin and I aren’t going to do anything!” her fair cheeks flooded with pink.

“Okay sure, whatever you say.”

Vickie rolled her eyes in defense before gasping, “Ooh, I found our next book club book!” Her jewelry started clanking together as she jogged across the store.

You sighed dramatically at her attempt to change the subject, “I still don’t understand why we call it a club if it’s just us-”

Vickie spun around to show off the novel she chose, “‘Sense and Sensibility’ by the one and only, Jane Austen.”

“Ugh, you know I don’t do historical fiction,” you grimace.

“But it’s about doomed love!”

“That’s relatable,” you scoffed

“Precisely,” Vickie said with a smile, already grabbing you your own copy.

_______________________________________________

Friday, April 4th, 1986

Steve did end up asking you out after your volunteer shifts at the High School. You both were awkward and giddy about it but it was comforting to know that he was just as nervous as you were. You found him to be very charming and endearing and you were excited to get to know him better.

Your first date was very sweet and simple. There wasn’t as much to do because of all the businesses that had to close due to the earthquake, so he took you to a diner that had managed to stay afloat.

You were having a great time, the spark of electricity you felt when you flirted with him that first day flooded through your body the second he came to pick you up, and it continued as you sat and ate your food. Your topic of conversation quickly transitioned to Robin and Vickie.

“And then the guy goes, ‘what? There’s no ‘b’ in rose.’ and the other guy goes ‘there was in this one!’” Steve looked at you with anticipation in his eyes and a big grin on his face. You blinked at him, still waiting for the punchline. He sagged slightly, realizing you didn’t get his joke, “it’s funnier when Robin tells it.”

“I’m sure it is,” you teased. “Robin is very funny.”

He rolled his eyes playfully and sent you a lopsided smile that sent butterflies to your stomach.

“Speaking of Robin…her and Vickie have been talking a lot on the phone,” you said, trying to sound nonchalant. You eyed him closely, assessing his reaction.

His eyes jumped around nervously as he took an extra long drink from his milkshake. You could already read him like a book, he was very obviously stalling.

Steve cleared his throat, “yeah, they seem to like each other a lot.”

You leaned forward, trying to invade his space a bit, “Steven Harrington… What do you know?” your voice was low and suggestive. It made Steve’s heart skip a beat, although he wasn’t sure if it was from his attraction to you or from nerves. He has spent so long keeping Robin’s secret, he didn’t want to accidentally out her and make her the ‘town’s pariah’, as she liked to say.

Little did he know, you made the same promise to Vickie.

When Steve kept his mouth closed, you sighed and said “okay, but if you found out on your own, that would be okay, and then we could talk about it, right?”

Steve had an idea as to what you were referring to, but he needed to tread lightly just in case. “Well, then it wouldn’t be a secret. So, yeah that would be okay,” he said carefully.

You eyed him for a moment, seeing if he’d break first.

He squinted his eyes back at you, “do you know something?”

“Do you know something?” you said quickly.

“I might know something.”

“I might know something, too.”

“What’s the thing you know?”

“Oh no, Steve. I can’t tell you until you tell me what you know.”

He shrugged softly, “I can’t tell you what I know.”

“Well then, I can’t tell you what I know.”

“Okay, fine.”

“Fine.”

You both sat there in awkward silence as you contemplated what the other was saying. Or not saying in this case. Anxiously gnawing at the dead skin of your thumb as you looked out the diner window, you could feel Steve staring at you, watching you suspiciously.

_______________________________________________

Saturday, April 5th, 1986

You and Steve were so excited to see each other again that you planned your second date for the very next day. Unfortunately, you had to cancel.

You didn’t want to postpone, especially since you were still eagerly still waiting to kiss him, but you had to. Vickie and Robin were finally going to hang out together and you wanted to spy. Some would probably call it stalking, but you didn’t care.

Being Vickie’s only friend that she trusted enough to share her secret with came with a lot of pros and cons. On the plus side you were honored that she trusted you, but on the other hand Vickie can talk a lot and it can get to be a bit draining. You earned the right to spy a little on their first date.

Also, Robin could be a serial killer. You never know. Stranger things have happened in Hawkins.

Steve actually told you, when you called him to reschedule, that he was about to cancel as well. He had some excuse that you weren’t really paying attention to, you were just excited that he wanted to eventually see you again.

You hung up the phone with a smile still on your face. Immediately, it started ringing again. “Hawkins’ Book Attic, how may I help you?”

“Hey Y/N, is Vickie there?”

Of course it was Robin.

“Hi Robin! Yeah just a second,” you pulled the phone away from your face before shouting, “Vickie! Phone’s for you!”

“Thanks Y/N, I’ll take it from the break room.” Vickie shouted from the back.

You returned the phone to your ear, covering the mouthpiece, so you can hear when Vickie picks it up.

“Hello?” you heard Vickie say.

You were about to hang up when you heard Robin say, “hey baby!”

That’s new, you thought. Against your better judgment, you continued to listen.

“Hey hun, I was just thinking about you.”

Your eyes widened. You looked around, making sure no one was watching you before you realized there was no one else in the store. It’s been closed while you and your co-workers cleaned up the place. The building itself wasn’t destroyed like some of the other businesses in town were, but it definitely left a mess with all the knocked over shelves and books.

“Awh, that’s sweet. I just wanted to check to see if we’re still hanging out after your shift?”

Ah, yes. The date you were planning to spy on.

Vickie giggled sweetly, “of course, Robin! I’ll pick you up after work and we’ll head over to that wildflower field by the quarry.”

You hung up after that, that’s all the intel you needed for your mission.

_______________________________________________

Luckily for you, your shift at the bookstore ended at the same time as Vickie’s. You managed to get to the field before them since Vickie needed to go pick up Robin. You found some street parking in a neighborhood nearby to ensure that your best friend didn’t see your car. You smoothly parallel parked in front of a dark brown BMW to start your stake out.

You focused on the road that was perpendicular to the street you were stationed on. Only when you saw Vickie’s blue hand-me-down Ford Cortina drive by did you grab your bag and exit the car, starting the short trek to the woods surrounding the open field of colorful wildflowers.

Spotting the two girls from a distance was easy with Vickie’s fire-red hair and Robin’s towering height. The tricky part was finding a suitable hiding spot.

Glancing around the wooded area you noticed a tall tree nearby. Before you could assess the strength of the branches you heard the rustling of a giant bush at the perimeter of the field a few feet away from you, followed by whispered curses. Denim clad legs were sticking out of the green shrubbery as a man was trying to wedge himself through it. You’d know those white sneakers (and that fine ass) anywhere.

“Steve?”

You heard a hollow “thunk” as Steve jumped in surprise, his head hitting one of the branches. He slowly emerged as he rubbed the back of his skull with a grimace. He was wearing giant women’s sunglasses and a long blonde wig that now sat lopsided on his head.

“O-oh, hey Y/N,” he said sheepishly.

You let out a surprised snort at his appearance, before realization bloomed in your chest. You smirked, knowingly.

“What are you doing here, Steve?”

Steve shuffled to the side, trying to block your view of Robin and Vickie setting up their picnic.

“Nothing,” he said quickly.

“Okay…what are you wearing?” you said suspiciously, tugging a leaf out of the synthetic fibers of his wig before crossing your arms.

Steve immediately paled. He snatched the jumbo lady glasses off his face, showing you his panicked brown eyes. What excuse could he come up with for wearing this in the middle of the woods instead of going on your second date?

“Uh…it’s just-...you see-”

“Is that Robin and Vickie?” you interrupted, craning your neck to look over Steve’s shoulder, pretending like you had just noticed them.

“What? Uh, n-no I don’t think so.”

He was such a bad liar.

“Yeah it is! Let’s go say hi-”

“NO!” Steve’s voice echoed across the field, making Vickie and Robin glance in their direction. Before they could see, you gripped Steve’s shoulders and pulled him down to crouch behind the shrub he was trying to hide in moments before.

“What are you-”

“Shut up, Harrington. Do you want to blow our cover?” you frantically whispered, peaking around the leaves carefully to see Robin handing Vickie a pink sparkly drink with a glimmering smile on her face.

Steve gasped dramatically. “I knew it! You’ve known this whole time?”

“Oh please, you knew nothing,” you said with a giggle.

“Okay fine, but I had my suspicions,” he grinned at you. Finally, he had someone to talk to about Robin’s love life. You two already had an immediate connection, but this solidified his attraction to you even more.

“Ooh! Wait, I came prepared too.” You swiveled, turning your back to him as you dug through your bag. He watched as you pulled something out that you placed on your face. Then you whipped out a baseball cap that you tucked your hair into before placing it on your head. You spun back around to face him again, “ta-da!”

He let out a surprised snort, similar to the one you gave when you saw him in his disguise. You had stuck a dark black mustache to your upper lip, wiggling your nose like a rabbit to show it off.

You both continued to laugh as quietly as you could at the absurdity of the situation you were in. Somehow, you both separately planned on canceling your second date, dressing up in a disguise, and spying on your friends.

“We need higher ground, I think,” Steve whispered after his laughs had died down.

“Come on,” you gripped his hand, ignoring the tingling sensation it gave you, and dragged him to the tree you were planning on scaling earlier.

You helped hoist each other up, finding two parallel branches that were sturdy enough for you and Steve to sit across from each other on. It was the perfect spot to spy on Robin and Vickie with the opening in the tree leaves, while still staying hidden. Steve rested a foot on your branch as he got comfortable. You were close enough to him that his spare knee was in between yours.

Your legs swung lazily underneath you as you admired him, happy to have someone to share this moment with.

“Look, look, look,” Steve whispered excitingly, leaning towards you more as he pointed towards your friends.

Angling your body to get a look, you didn’t realize how close your faces had gotten, but Steve did. He nearly fell out of the tree when he got a whiff of your sweet perfume. He held his breath as he subtly studied your face, scrunched in concentration before lighting up with excitement. Despite the fake mustache, you were the prettiest person he had ever seen.

“I can’t believe it. Robin is feeding her! And it's a strawberry? That’s like the sexiest food,” you snickered. Turning to see Steve’s reaction, you almost bumped noses with him.

Both of you froze, no one was leaning in, but no one was pulling away either.

After what felt like forever you whispered, “Hey Steve?”

“Yeah?” he replied, equally breathless.

“Have you ever kissed a woman with a mustache before?”

He beamed at you, eyes sparking with humor. “Can’t say that I have,” he glanced at your lips, “have you ever kissed a guy wearing his mom’s old halloween wig?”

Before you could stop it, you snorted right in his face. Luckily, it made him smile even more.

He gently held your cheek as you placed your hand on his leg that was still propped up on the branch you were sitting on. Your heart was practically bruising your ribcage as it pumped in anticipation. Steve’s face heated up even more as you both started to lean in.

Before your lips could touch, his foot shifted and you lost your balance, sending both of you tumbling out of the tree, breaking branches along the way.

Steve landed on his back in the plush grass below, it wouldn’t have hurt if you didn’t land directly on top of him. The breath in his lungs got pushed out as he let out a loud “oof” that quickly dissolved into laughter. Once you realized he was okay, you began to full body laugh alongside him.

Both your disguises got lost in the chaos, he could finally get a good look at you. You were still laying on top of him as his brown eyes stared happily up at you, ignoring the leaves and debris that were still raining from your fall.

It’s like deja-vu, time slows as you stare into each other's eyes, slowly leaning forward yet again.

“a-hem!”

Both your heads whipped to the side to see Robin, now only a few feet away from you, glaring disapprovingly at Steve with her hands on her hips. Vickie had her arms crossed and her furrowing brows were directed towards you.

“Our cover has been blown!” you say to Steve.

“Retreat! Retreat! Abort mission,” Steve said, a grin still plastered on his face as you both hopped up and ran through the woods, hand-in-hand. Robin and Vickie watched you both go, listening as the sounds of maniacal laughter echoed throughout the woods, fading away the further you got.

Both of you made it back to your cars, still laughing through your heavy breathing. Steve didn’t waste time catching his breath before gripping the back of your head and planted his lips to yours.

You were still giddy with laughter as you kissed him back, wrapping your arms around his neck in an attempt to get closer. He snaked his arms around your waist as he walked you backwards, pining you to his car.

You pulled back for air, still nuzzling your nose against his. Both of you were still smiling like a couple of idiots as happiness and adrenaline flowed through your veins.

You continued to pant in each other’s faces before you whispered, “hey Steve?”

Steve pecked your lips again, “yeah?”

“So… you know that Fast Times tape we returned a couple weeks ago?”

_______________________________________________

Thanks for reading!

Tags:

@johnricharddeacycy

@stormwellsstuff

@impossibelle

@kennedy-brooke

@heyyimmisunderstood

#stranger things #steve harrington x reader #robin buckley #mutal pining #steve harrington x y/n #steve x reader #canon divergent #80s #netflix #vickie's friend #robin x vickie #fluff

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tsubaki94 · 1 year

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Why is Sam so petty? It's like she wanted Danny to say something that would give her a reason to hate him, and because he didn't, she hates him.

Alright, let’s look at Sam’s character and how she sees Danny.

First off, she is quick to judge, that’s a character flaw. The first time she meets Danny he is cutting ahead of her in line to stand with the A-listers whom she despises. So right off she gropes Danny into the spoiled privileged category and confronting him only confirms this, it is also confirmed when Danny tells Dash he is going to try and get a new gaming console out of Vlad. Basically not a good first impression.

Then the accident happens, and he is missing from school for two months before showing up with Tucker late for a class having apparently rescued him from a locker where Dash (Danny’s best friend as far as she knows) put him. However, this is also where Tucker starts defending Danny because he realizes he wasn’t as bad as he first thought, (and he pities him). Still, Sam is greatly annoyed at Danny especially seeing that he is just doing a wheelie in the back of the classroom not even listening to the teacher. And then he gets paired up with Tucker for the writing assignment, emotionally for her, this is like having her best friend stolen by Danny.

What happens after that? Well, she sees Tucker and Danny in Doomed together instead of writing the book report which Tucker said he was going to do. So when he gets to school the next day she is pissed and again Tucker shuts her down and forces Sam to rethink.

She watches Danny during gym-class sees him struggle and at the end of class Dash pours water on him unprovoked. Automatically Sam’s moral justice takes over and she sees Danny as a victim of bullies and tries to comfort him because maybe Tucker was right. After all a friend wouldn’t just dump water on someone.

Then we have the math scene and Danny is struggling, something she can’t relate to, and then Tucker helps him and that annoys her because Tucker is her friend. The paper plane only makes things worse as she sees Tucker becoming better and better friends with Danny. This is where we see a bit deeper into Sam’s mentality. She doesn’t let people in because she is afraid of losing them or getting hurt by them, but Tucker got in and stays with her even when she is bitching.

Because if we look at Tucker for a moment, he is more forgiving and doesn’t judge the book by its cover. He also noticed that Danny struggles with reading and tries to help him, something Danny gladly accepts, unlike Sam who needs to be able to do things on her own. And Tucker has already realized that Danny, like Sam, gives attitude when he feels attacked.

But back to Sam and the vegetarian Lunch Week. First off, it wasn’t her intention to make it all vegetarian for a week, she and a lot of students in school wanted to get a vegetarian alternative, maybe even vegan, so that they too could eat the school lunch and didn’t have to bring their own. The school decided to see how much vegetarian food they had to make and what the general student body thought of the dishes, so they made it a Week.

Sam tries to explain this to Tucker (who overplayed things because he is nervous about the change being permanent and him having to think of what is being served instead of just taking the meat and potatoes like he always do.) but when Tucker hears her say that she was a part of doing the changes his brain doesn’t prosses the rest. He feels betrayed and Sam’s fear of losing him as a friend only grows.

Tucker leaves to calm himself down and think over what Sam said, he isn’t going to hate her because of the lunch menu but will bitch about it just like she does about people. It also helps him cope with the situation.

Sam who is left alone with Danny really wants to start a fight with him and prove that he isn’t good enough to be friends with Tucker. But Danny doesn’t act like she thought he would and shows that he cares for Tucker. This leaves makes Sam angry because he doesn’t act like she wants him to, but she also softens up to him because he is on her side on the lunch menu debate and he doesn’t just take Tucker’s kindness but also gives it back.

To summarize, Sam thought Danny was just another jerk like the A-listers. She wants to keep believing this because it’s easier than getting to know someone and letting them know her. However, she listens to Tucker and takes his words to heart, sees that the A-listers aren’t treating Danny like a friend. And when she tries to confront him, Danny doesn’t act the way she thought he would forcing her rethink her judgement of him. She puts her judgement to the side for the moment in favor of keeping Tucker as her friend and avoids stepping on his toes when it comes to what she thinks of Danny.

Wow, this got long. I hope you understand the thought process behind Sam a bit more. And as people have pointed out, she is only 14, still a child with room to grow.

#Phantom comic #ask #question #answer #long post #rant #character explination #what goes on in Sam's head #art #fanart #comic #what has happend so far #Sam manson #Sam #Danny fenton #Danny Phantom #Tucker foley #Tucker

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writingforatwistedworld · 2 years

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Hi can I request self aware Idia Shroud with player who somehow got inside the game on accident and met Idia.

Self-aware au

I do not take any responsibility for you reading this no matter which age group you are from!

WARNINGS: Yandere themes, religion, kidnapping, imprisonment, stalking, murder, death, unhealthy relationship, unhealthy mindset, obsession

Entering their world

Did a dorm reopen?

Does that mean that even more students will go to this school??!

Idia was already stressed out enough before this happned

After all, he noticed a longer time window of inactivety from the Overseer

Which meant that he seriously had better things to worry about than even more noisy people who could interrupt his peace

And then there is no way to avoid going out

There had been a server crash in Night Raven College which meant no internet

Which also meant that he needed to go out

And that was when he passed it, the Ramshackle dorm

Wasn’t it supposed to be used once more? Why did it still look like it could collaps any moment?

And that is where you enter the picture

Flinging open the door you were about to step out, needing to do something outside of the huge mountians of dust

Only to see a huge pillair of fire igniting into the sky

Mhm. Ten points if you guessed that it was Idias hair

What??! The Overseer??! HERE???!!!

Believe it or not but despite him coming from a place that sees you as a God he doesn’t has it in himself to approach you

Instead he will watch you like a deer in headights as you approach

He isn’t able to say a single word in front of you

Now you either

Ask if he is ok and then leave, ending up with you two never meeting again

Ask if he is ok, stay, and then seal your fate with a future as a “special someone”

I would recommend picking the first scenario but that is up to you

But if you took the second scenario thing go ugly quickly

There is no moment Idia isn’t watching you

Walking down the street? He is listening in with the microphone in your phone

Sitting in class? A small camera is hidden, perfectly zooming in on your face

Banging against the door of the room in which he loocked you for all eternity in? Oh… I didn’t mean to tell you that

But at least life is good in that room… if you have no problem seeing any other haircolour than your own and fire ever again and to talk as good as never

That doesn’t mean Idia isn’t affected by you being looked in there

He has that protection mechanism when it comes to you in which he realises that he literally kidnapped you and then tells himself that this isn’t what it seems like, it’s just you staying over for a longer while

And how could he ever let his God stay in that ruin??!

Though, if you are worried that he might becomes creepy with his devotion to you and saying that you are a God then be reassured

Like the greeks did his people see human flaw within you so of course it would be awkward if he just fell to his knees in front of you (even though he wants to)

However, there are sometimes moments in which something burried deep inside of his soul surfaces, him gripping your arm to tight, how he stares at you sometimes and worst of all, him showing that he had been watching all along when he tells you moments you experienced when no one was around

Otherwise he is really sweet

If we ignore the corpses found in a river leading to the sea. They look oddly burned

But what is he supposed to do? Ignore the sinners? Good joke but no

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hyperactivewhore · 5 months

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Why do you think that many people tend to devalue Klaus’s relationship with Cami, Aurora, and even Hayley? Honestly, I think that out of all his love interests in the show, Klaus truly only loved Cami, Aurora, and Hayley. Cami understood Klaus very well, and she loved him despite all his flaws. Cami encouraged him to become a better person for Hope. And when Klaus was imprisoned, the person he imagined was Cami.

Klaus was hung up on Aurora for centuries. He painted her constantly. While he loved Cami, he definitely also loved Aurora. He’s the type of person that falls in love forever. And while this is a super unpopular opinion, I think that if he was alive during Legacies, he would’ve ended up with Aurora.

Hayley wasn’t really a love interest and I don’t think Klaus loved her romantically - but he totally loved her platonically. She was his best friend. He truly valued her as a person and respected her so much.

Say what you want about Klaus, but he had excellent taste in romantic partners. All his lovers, including Caroline, are beautiful and amazing. And this is no hate to Caroline and Klaus shippers, but I really think that Klaus only loved Cami, Aurora, and Hayley. His feelings for Caroline are rather shallow when compared to his feelings for Cami, Aurora, and Hayley - so why do you think so many people ship Caroline and Klaus together?

Oh anon, I love talking about Klaus Mikaelson and his fucked up relationships.

Why people ship klaroline? Whenever I come across shippers of them, they always say it's because Klaus and Caroline had the biggest chemistry in all of tvdu. Which, in my opinion, is false. I personally think Caroline looks uncomfortable and pissed off with Klaus in half of their interactions, and their development is so bad done and weird so they just have him give her puppy eyes out of nowhere and have her laughing at his jokes when she hated him the episode before.

I think that a big part of why people ship klaroline is because Caroline was the first woman Klaus showed an romantic interest in in the series. We have Klaus who is the villain, who until the moment has been nothing but evil to everyone around him and out of nowhere he gets soft for her, so people lost their shit and started shipping them like crazy. Which mind you, is exactly like happened: Candice herself said klaroline just happened because the fans liked them.

But in my opinion it was just stupid. If they wanted Klaus to have any interest in Caroline, they should have built it better; the only explanation we get of his interest in her is nearly ten years later when Caroline says in The Originals she believes he only liked her because she reminded him of when he was human, innocent and young. And I kinda get this, because despite how much he goes on about being feared Klaus does love having people who say he can be saved, loved and etc.

The fact that the plot and timeline was often bended to their will is a turn off for many fans as well and it always pissed me off too because it didn't make sense and still doesn't. The biggest example I can think of right now is when Klaus sent her money for the Salvatore school: he was supposed to be trapped in Marcel's dungeon by then, but the timeline of these shows has never made any sense anyway. Or how in they inserted Klaus in every one of Caroline's scenes in The Originals; Daniel Gillies himself was upset by this, they even had to delete some of his scenes to fit hers in, which is a reason of why season five was so rushed and full of bad writing.

But honestly that's the main reason I can think of. Whenever I stumble across a klaroline ship the comments always are "their chemistry" or "they look so good together" and more things about the ship. I honestly think klaroline wouldn't have blew up the way it did if it had been done these last years, but many of the plots that there are in tvd wouldn't have made it to the screen if it had been streaming this year.

I fully agree with his other ships. Canonically Klaus just loved romantically three women: Tatia, Aurora and Camille. However, I don't really think he was in love with Tatia, just infatuated. He's not as affected by her as Elijah is, but once Klaus loves you or he takes a serious romantic interest in someone he really never forgets about them: Camille and Aurora are the biggest proof of this.

Losing Aurora really took a toll on him and shaped him to be the character we know and people often brush over this because they don't like Aurora/for shipping reasons. I think she's his most interesting romantic relationship, and they're my favorite tvdu ship. It's kinda canon he loved her more than any of his other love interests and don't get me wrong, I love Klaus and Camille but in my opinion Klaus always forgot about her whenever Aurora was around which just pissed me off.

If Cami had remained dead by the time Legacies took place, I do believe Klaus and her would have gotten back together. To me, Aurora was never truly evil and I think they should have handled her character better, but Klaus understood her even after everything she did to him and viceversa, and their chemistry is just so perfect and they had sexual tension in every one of their interactions. But if Cami had been alive, I honestly think Klaus would have remained with her.

Everyone who follows me knows I believe Klaus loved Aurora romantically the most, but by the time Legacies takes place Klaus would probably adore Cami a lot more than it's already shown in canon and perhaps they would even be married, and she was good for him and his family. In the modern day, Aurora wasn't good for him or his family at all (she was literally trying to kill Hope) and in general, she needed to work on herself, to try to let go of Tristan's abuse before getting into a relationship with the man whose family is responsible for her fucked up mental health.

However, I do think Hope would stop her family if they tried to kill Aurora, she's really empathetic in these kind of things and they had a slight respect for each other by the time Aurora died. Klaus and her would probably talk, perhaps she would even have a conversation with Camille before leaving to live her best life which it's what should have happened in canon. Hayley would probably thank her for saving her daughter too, and I think they - by this I mean the whole Mikaelson family - would agree to try to not kill each other again, but who knows with them?

I love Klaus and Hayley together. Whether people ship them romantically or not isn't important to me, I can see their potential and though I personally think they wouldn't work, I can understand why other people do. I really like how often she stands up to him whenever she feels he's getting too cocky, or when it comes to their daughter. I love how much their relationship developed in the last three seasons and how gutted he was after her death, he didn't just love her for being his mother's daughter but for being his best friend and family. It was beautiful for me to see how much Hayley fought for him and never gave up, they deserved to raise their daughter together or at least, Hope deserved it.

And I honestly agree: he has amazing taste. I would get with any of these girls in an instant, they're all beautiful.

#anti klaroline #klaus mikaelson #hayley marshall #aurora de martel #camille o'connell #caroline forbes #klamille #klayley #klaurora #the originals #the vampire diaries #legacies

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charliehoennam · 8 months

Text

Jarhead

Chapter 1 - The Set Up

A/N: this is a little series based on Jake Gyllenhaal's character Anthony Swofford in the movie Jarhead. Jake is just too cute in the movie to ignore and I just wanna give him a happy ending with lots of angst on the way there. Shoutout to @juniebugg for the idea!

Pairing: Anthony Swofford x f!reader

Warnings: mentions of bad break-ups, flirtation, language, no smut....yet

Word count: 3,185

SHARING IS CARING, SO REBLOG!

You walked into the salon, greeting your lady co-workers as you strutted to your station. Doing hair was definitely not putting your degree in practice, but it got your bills paid. And you found it rather pleasing helping other regain their confidence. The salon belonged to your aunt and you had worked there since high school. It helped get you through high school and college, though it wasn’t quite enough to keep you from applying for student loans.

Despite not being in your area, you liked the salon. You liked the people you met, the elderly regulars that stopped by once a week for a perm or a manicure, the neighborhood gossip that they were always eager to share, the co-workers that always had your back.

One of them was Maria. She was a beautiful woman with long dark hair and tan skin that made even gold envious. She was admirable in so many ways. With her husband, Juan, away on deployment, she was quickly thrust into the role of a single parent to their 3-year-old son. She never complained about it. She might have complained about Juan and his habits, but never that he had to be away. In some ways, she was very thankful. The Marines had provided many benefits for them to compensate for his absence like providing stable housing, health-care and education for their family. Granted there were flaws in the system and his absence was at times unbearable, she understood and supported his decision to enlist. Aside from being a great wife and mother, she was also your great friend.

“Buenos, chica” she smiled hugging you. “How was your date last night?”

“Total dud. Just didn’t really click, you know?”

“Yeah, I know why too. You still hung up on that fool.”

“I’m not hung up on anyone.”

“Yes, you are. That puto lost the best thing that ever happened to him, but you know what? Good for you. You’re better without him and you deserve better than his broke ass.”

“Can we please not talk about him?” You sighed, eager to leave your ex in the past.

“As you wish, chica. Besides, I got someone I want you to meet.” She smirked widely prepping her hair brushes and combs to make sure they’re clean for a new day.

“He cute?”

“Don’t tell Juan, but he is fine, chica. I love my man, but I know fine when I see it” she laughed nudging you with her elbow. “His name is Tony, he’s gonna be at the barbeque we’re having for this weekend for Daniel’s birthday. You’re coming, right? Danny’s gonna be so sad if you don’t.”

“I’ll be there, don’t worry” you chuckled as you reassured her. “I already got his present and everything. I wouldn’t miss it for the world. You know how I adore that little man.”

And you really did. You often babysat him when Juan was on leave and needed some alone time with his wife.

“Good, because I already told Tony I’ll be introducing you to him.”

“Are you serious? You know how I feel about that, Mari.”

“Girl, don’t worry. I showed him a picture and he’s interested. I think you guys are a great match and Juan agrees.”

“Juan agrees with everything you say, he’s your husband” you laughed.

“Well, just come out and meet him. You don’t have to do anything and if you’re not interested, I’ll forget it. But trust me, you’re gonna wanna meet him” she chuckled with a smirk.

"Fine. I'll meet him, but I'm not promising anything."

From everything she described about Tony, you couldn't deny the butterflies forming in your stomach as the days went by. As the hours crept closer, they quickly began to swarm in your belly and you couldn't remember the last time you felt this way.

You decided to look extra nice that day. It was more than just a casual birthday party, but you also didn't want to go over the top. Settling on a new figure flattering skirt and cute top, you accessorized strategically with a cute necklace that hung just above your fairly modest cleavage. You weren't hoping to end up married by the end of the day, but Lord knows you needed some physical action.

The party was already in full swing by the time you arrived with your renowned dish of crispy and perfectly seasoned panko fried vegetables. Knowing they were a popular favorite among the adults, you'd made more than plenty in two large aluminum foil pans.

Walking into the backyard through the side gate, you immediately recognized the song playing from inside the house. Love Like This by Faith Evans was a personal favorite of Maria's and you had sung to that exactly CD mix in the car plenty of times driving home from your girls night out.

The kids were happily playing on the bounce house Juan had rented for the day. Some played in the pool, stopping only to find their parents for a drink of water. Most of the women were sat by the picnic table setting out the food, so you quickly made your way over to greet them. You knew everyone pretty well having been a family friend for years. Some were Maria's aunts and cousins. A few were your own co-workers and you greeted everyone, with a warm, bright smile and a gentle embrace.

Looking over at the grilling area that had been Juan's third pride and joy - second to the pool he had been finally able to afford and his very own family- you couldn't help but scan over the men gathered there. You couldn't make out what they were talking about, but you knew that Tony had to be one of them. Your heart raced at the thought.

Your eyes landed on a tall man stood beside Juan, helping him man the grill. His hair was short as if he'd been growing it out after a buzz cut. His features strongly resembled Maria's description. His smile stretched from ear to ear as he patted Juan on his shoulder, possibly complimenting him on something. You couldn't tell what he said; the distance and music didn't quite favor that. His long thick eyebrows intensified the bright blue orbs that shone even from a distance and sent goosebumps down your arms the second he caught you staring.

You blushed and quickly looked back down at your dish as you removed the aluminum foil to reveal the fried tasty side dish, secretly praying he hadn't noticed. But unknowingly to you, he had.

Just as you knew who he was, he knew exactly who you were as well. Juan told him all about you the day after he'd agreed with Maria to hook you two up. And Tony couldn't be more thankful. He was starstruck the minute he saw you arrived. Juan nodded at you with a smirk as he laid another steak on the grill.

"That's her, man. What do you think huh?"

"I think she's fucking beautiful, that's what I think" he chuckled excitedly as he patted his friend’s shoulder. "What’s her name again?” he joked.

"Dude, I know your brain is small and can only process shit at a slow pace, but please don't fuck up her name" Juan joked.

"I got it covered, man. Relax. Y/N will be in good hands soon enough" Tony chuckles back at him.

After sharing a couple smiles and glances, you decided to make the first move and walked over to grilling area as the guys began served the perfectly charred meats.

"Think you fellas could spare me a steak?" You smirked glancing between them.

"You can have your pick, sweetheart" Tony smiled back. "I don't believe we've been properly introduced. I'm Tony" he stated holding his hand out.

"Pleasure to meet you. If you're Tony, then I guess we hardly need an introduction. Maria's told me a bit about you already" you smirked shaking his hand.

"Has she?" You nodded with a smirk.

"Good things though. She said you're a real gentleman."

"I try to be, at least" he smiled.

Seeing him up close now, you couldn't help but take in all his details. His long brown eyelashes only embellished his blue doe eyes. Small brown freckles adorned his skin. His beard was grown out just enough to notice he had nice potential of beautifully growing it out to its full extent, but not long enough to hide the skin, dimples and freckles underneath it. He was a sight for sore eyes.

The attraction between you and Tony was undeniable. You invited him to sit with you at one of the fold-out tables to eat. The conversation flowed naturally as you savored your meal and watched the children play while the hours passed. It might have been due to the fact that you had a bit in common like similar musical taste or interest in movies and books.

Not everything was in mutual interest and Tony liked that you were willing to debate and defend your beliefs. He admired that about you, that you stuck to your guns. He also liked that you didn't shy away from teasing and joking. It had felt like you'd known each other for years before. Like two old friends reunited after years apart, almost as if time had no effect. Tony had craved for that: the instant connection and not only attraction. He'd met plenty of girls before, but it had been a while since he felt a connection with someone. Due to the way his last relationship with his ex, Kristina, had ended, Tony hadn’t allowed himself to get too comfortable with girls. He had his flings and they stayed just that: flings with no emotional attachment. Until now. Until he met you. And his favorite thing about meeting you? How easily you made him forget about the world surrounding you both.

You two seemed to be inseparable the whole day until Daniel raced over to you, excitedly asking about the present you had promised. It was only then that you realized you forgot it in the car.

You made your way to the gate and left the backyard to walk out to your car. It had barely shut behind you when you heard it open back up. Turning around, you found Tony stepping out.

"Tony." You smiled curiously. "You forget something too?"

"Uh, no. Not exactly."

His lips curled into a smirk as he tenderly cradled the side of your neck. Guiding your lips to his, he pressed a sweet kiss. You could feel him smile into it as he relished the wet warmth of your lips slowly melting into his.

"I'm sorry. I probably should've asked first, but I've been dying to do that all day."

You could feel the blood rushing to your cheeks as you beamed up at him.

"N-no, don't apologize." You stuttered, still stunned at the very pleasant surprise. "I'm definitely not sorry about it at all."

"Neither am I really." He smirked and returned to the backyard with the widest grin on his face.

Juan was quick to notice the smile and seemed to read Tony’s mind when he walked back to continue his help, slicing and distributing the steaks, sausages and chicken wings.

“Oh, you went for it, didn’t you? Cabron! I knew you would. You’re a dog” Juan laughed, nudging his friend.

Soon after everyone had had a couple slices of the delicious chocolate cake, the party had come to its end and you offered to stay and help the small family clean up. Tony stuck around as well since you promised him a ride home, but he was more than quick to help out. So, you got ahold of a large garbage bag and went around the backyard, collecting the disposal plates, cups and forks that some guests had forgotten to throw out. Tony was further down the yard, helping Juan scrub the grill down.

Daniel sat up on the porch, opening his brand-new presents. You smiled as you watched his excited reaction to the new water gun you'd gotten him. It was more like a rifle and the size of it made the little boy even more eager to try it out. You were quick to offer to help him fill it up. Once it was full, his little legs quickly ran across the yard toward Tony and his father. His first victim was Juan. Tony was right after.

"Oh, no! Man down! Man down!" Tony exclaimed, holding the wet spot on his chest as he fell to one knee.

"Please, Danny. I thought we were friends. I let you have a cupcake before the cake." His voice was strained as if in pain.

You had to admit, Tony was a pretty good actor. The way he fell to his side when Daniel sprayed him again was pretty realistic. He played dead until Daniel was close enough. Suddenly shooting up, he grabbed the child careful enough to not hurt him and wrapped his arms around him. Daniel's laughs filled the air as he dropped the toy gun.

"Get his weapon, Cortez!"

Juan smirked and quickly picked it up to spray his son.

You chuckled as you watched the wholesome scene. Tony clearly had a way with kids due to his playful nature. It made you wonder if he would be the same with his own kids. It made you think about having your own kids and you wondered if that could happen with Tony, but it was far too early to even think about that.

"So, what do you think, chica?" Maria asked coming into the kitchen and snapping you out of your daze.

"Huh? Oh, sorry" you chuckled blushing. "About?"

"About Tony, duh!"

"He's uh definitely cuter than you described." You smirked, replying in the most modest way possible.

"I told you he was fine" she laughed. "You know he likes you too?"

"Does he?" You smiled thinking about the kiss.

"Yeah, but I think you knew that already."

Damn right, you did.

After saying goodbye to everyone, Maria handed you a couple of containers full of leftover food and cake. She'd always separate some for you to take home after get-togethers. It was her way of thanking you for all the help you gave them when they needed it.

“You sure you don’t mind that I’m kinda wet?” Tony asked slightly worried that he’d ruin your passenger seat as he fidgeted with the containers in his lap as you drove to his home.

“Don’t worry. This car has seen a lot worse” you chuckled. It wasn’t the fanciest car, but it served enough to get you from point A to point B.

“You got a pretty nice way with kids. You got any of your own?”

You wanted to be as subtle as possible about your curiosity in his past relationships and his opinion on having kids.

“I don’t, no. But who knows one day? I do have a sister though. Rini… She’s younger than me. Guess that’s how I got my way with ‘em.”

“Oh, that’s cool. I didn’t know you had a sister. She nice?”

“She’s great. Real sweetheart. I love her to death.”

“I take you’re very close?”

“Yeah. We try to be, at least. My folks aren’t exactly the Brady Bunch, so we try to be there for each other.”

The way he didn’t delve into too many details made you think it might have been a sensitive subject to touch on, at least for a first date. Despite being curious about his family history, you simply nodded and glanced at him with a smile.

“Family can be tough. Wouldn’t be family if they weren’t” you chuckled.

To diffuse the hidden discomfort, you reached out and turned on the radio. Skimming through the channels, he grinned when he caught the sound of one of his favorites, Hip Hop Hooray by Naughty By Nature.

“N-no, no, leave it there. This is a great song, one of my favorites.”

He quickly jumped into the middle of the first verse, rapping along to the song perfectly knowing every lyric by heart. You smiled widely listening to him before joining him in the chorus, waving a hand side to side to the beat of the song. He was surprised when you joined in on the second verse, proving you knew just as much as he did.

You sang along together the rest of the way. If there had been a worry in mind, neither of you could think about them now. It was a perfect ending the day you had. Neither of you wanted it to end just yet.

Pulling to the front of his humble townhouse, you parked and shut the car off.

“You know somethin’?” He started as he leaned back against the headrest, rolling his head over to gaze at you longingly. “I had a really great day, thanks to you. I was nervous when Juan said you’d be there today. I didn’t really know what to expect. But I’m really glad I met you.”

You smiled as you unconsciously mimicked his movement and leaned back into your seat.

“Don’t sweat it. I was nervous as shit too” you chuckled. “But I have no regrets. I had a great time too.”

“It doesn’t have to end if you don’t want it to.”

“You trying to say something, Tony?” you smirked.

“Maybe. I’m just saying” he shrugged with a sly smile. “Maybe you could come in and I dunno. Maybe have some wine with me.”

“I’m driving tonight though.”

“You could sleep it off at my place. Drive home in the morning.”

You wanted to say yes. You wanted nothing more than to mount him like a horse and ride him all night. You were eager to get laid at first. You hadn’t expected to really like Tony. The fear of coming off desperate must have been radiating off of you. You could’ve sworn he was reading your mind when he reached over to hold your hand as you began nervously picking at your nails.

“We don’t have to do anything if you don’t want to. I really mean that, sweetheart” he said with a soft comforting tone, looking down at your hands aa he thought about how perfectly they would fit together with his. “I just really like talking to you. And it’s been a long time since I’ve wanted to just talk, you know? You can crash on the couch if you want. I’ll keep my hands to myself.”

His concern for your sense of security was genuine. He wasn’t going to come onto you if you don’t want him to. It was everything you needed to hear to silence the doubt in your head.

“Yeah” you smiled from ear to ear. “I’d love some wine. And just you know, you don’t have to keep your hands to yourself.”

#anthony swofford #anthony swofford x reader #anthony swofford x you #anthony swofford x y/n #jarhead #jake gyllenhaal #jake gyllenhaal x reader #jake gyllenhaal imagine #jake gyllenhaal fanfic

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