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leviiattacks · 3 years

Note

CASHIER LEVI AND LIKE THE READER IS THE CUSTOMER AND IT’S LIKE THEY HAVE A CRUSH ON EACHTOHER

author note :: honestly not my best at all..... like at all..... this was actually pretty good but the entire draft got deleted and i just lost all my effort but i felt bad for starting it and not completing it for anon so you may take whatever i have managed to salvage. i hope u enjoy it :’( i am extremely sick rn and yeah writing is the only break i am currently getting from anything :-) SO AGAIN I’ M SORRY ANON..... i may write a 10k + word fic on this though so i can redeem myself bc this is just disappointing 😭

word count :: 3.3k

every single thursday you stop by ackermart. maybe it’s because the day is convenient for you or perhaps it’s because of a certain cashier that works the evenings...

HAHA it’s got nothing to do with a cashier why would it have anything to do with a cashier? :-)

today is like any other. you walk through the fresh produce aisle then proceed to make your way towards the bakery section picking up a loaf of bread

it’s stupid, you know it is but... you think you’ve worked up enough courage to speak to him today!!

and who is him you may ask?

levi at till number four. his tired eyes always happen to pierce into yours and his calloused thumbs brush past your skin when you hand him your rewards card

levi is what his bright red name tag says and although he doesn’t look like a levi you’d like to think your crush isn’t stealing someone’s identity so you believe that it’s his real name

anxiously fiddling with your basket you’re beginning to think this was a horrible idea

the girl ahead of you is flirting up a storm with him and although he’s not reciprocating it by any means you still feel deterred

levi bags the last of her groceries and looks up at her when she asks for a way to contact him. he doesn’t look mad... just bored?

“ma’am. this is an ackermart i don’t think it’s appropriate you ask me for my number. the customer service line is listed on our website.”

the woman raises a brow looking completely flabbergasted. okay, if everything before this wasn’t a warning THIS sure was

she stomps off when she realises levi isn’t kidding and you think you’d feel bad for her maybe if she was more respectful about it

“next customer.” levi calls over his shoulder and you shuffle forward pretending to be engrossed in your phone

“cash or card?” he asks plainly.

you hear the BEEP of your groceries being scanned and think on it for a while before replying with “cash”

you’re clearly pretty good at your pretend to be totally into your phone act because levi tries to get your attention but you don’t hear what he has to say till the third time he repeats himself

but even then you’re still unsure what it is he’s said????

looking down you see his hand is stuck out in front of you and now you’re even more confused

faltering for a second you look at his palm and then speak

“um, i guess your hand is nice? it’s pretty big compared to the rest of you actually.”

“i was asking for your cash?” he says and now you look at his palms in mortification

gasping you yANK your hand into your purse as you laugh awkwardly fishing around to find your money

“oh, OH i knew that. just kidding!! i mean- i meant that thing about your hand?? but i thought it was- i funny? yes the joke funny? i’m-”

he leans back into his spinning chair and sighs contently. “you’re not making much sense peaches.”

“pe- peaches??” you repeat. no way you’ve heard that correct

levi lazily points at the abundance of the aforementioned fruit in your grocery bags

“you must love em.”

“i, well yeah i do like peaches but i also like...” um??? what food would make you look sophisticated and professional?

OH YEAH

“FRENCH CUISINE :-)!!!!” you say rather proudly

“...cool. i guess.” levi hands you your grocery bag which is basically an invitation asking for you to get out

he doesn’t seem mad but he’s definitely going to look back at this encounter and laugh his ass off at how stupid you are

hanging your head down low in embarrassment you make your way out towards your car

there’s always next time!! maybe you can practice in the mirror yeah that does sound like it would help!!!

okay so.

it is officially next time.

actually you never got the opportunity to practice in front of the mirror because you chickened out of looking like an idiot even if it was in the privacy of your own home

but!!! you did try to practice some cool pick up lines because who doesn’t like a good pickup line or two??

the two mini milk cartons in your hand and the pack of doughnuts you have tucked under your arm aren’t too heavy so you aren’t too worried about having to wait in the line

for some reason the guy in front of you keeps turning around and glancing at you as if you don’t even exist

you are not casper the ghost

also casper is a little boy and you definitely aren’t a little boy

finally after a good five minutes the man ahead of you is having his stuff scanned but he’s STILL doing it. even levi notices and gives him an odd look which borders annoyance and anger.

“can i pay for your groceries? maybe walk you to your car?” the stranger asks suddenly

so that’s what this is, he’s simply taken an interest in you

my god this is new but it is uncomfortable and you’d rather say no

“oh, i actually walked here and no thanks i can pay for my own. enjoy the rest of your day!!” you hope your white lie is enough to fool the man but instead of agreeing as any other person would he looks majorly deceived

“i saw you in the parking lot.” ok this is getting a bit too uncomfortable for your liking

“c’mon i’m offering to buy your shit too?”

his voice is raising and you’re not sure what exactly you can do but thankfully for you the manager steps in and takes him away before any more threats can be made

the man had taken up so much of your attention you almost forgot levi was even there until you turned back around

“do you want a member of staff to accompany you to your car? it’s getting dark out.” levi’s comment helps ease your nerves and you try to laugh off what just happened

“i’m good :-)” you say shaking a little. you’re unsure if it’s the cold or the fact you still haven’t completely calmed down

“you sure peaches?”

“i haven’t bought any peaches this time.”

“you’re still peaches to me.” your cheeks flush at his confidence

wait, maybe this is your chance. you’re the last person in his line and they’re closing up for the day so...

“could you walk me to my car?”

and to your surprise even before you can take back what you’ve said levi agrees

it stays like that for a while.

every thursday levi walks you to your car by the end of his shift, all the while the two of you exchange a few words together

like last week you asked him what his favourite colour was (he said purple) you’ve learnt about his hobbies (he’s a decent cook), you’ve even found out about some of his own personal problems. he had mentioned suffering with insomnia in passing.

to be honest each and every time he walks you to your car he has to notice that you begin to park further and further away from the front entrance. but if he does notice he doesn’t say a word about it

“is that all you’re checking out?” you ask with a cheeky grin plastered across your face

looking down at your new dress your lopsided grin is far from fading away any time soon. you especially picked this one out after asking levi what his favourite colour was last week

god. this is so embarrassing but never actually have you had a crush this huge

levi who’s sat behind the counter shoots you a look which almost seems to be on the verge of uninterested. he isn’t entertaining this at all or this is just his typical bored face, you can’t really tell

BUT..... you still have a huge crush on him and you aren’t one to give up this easily

for the record you don’t harass him or anything, just the occasional hint is thrown around but he’s either really dense or doesn’t care

his expression does you no favours, you can’t tell what he’s thinking half the time

“you’re always buying energy drinks... might want to cut down on those they’re no good for you.”

warmth blooms in your chest. he’s just saying it to make small talk but the fact he even thinks to bring that up has your heart fluttering

“i- well- yeah i will!! just have a few overdue essays to get over with :-)” twiddling your thumbs together you think that makes your nerves too obvious so you begin to scratch at the back of your neck

if anything is a dead give away it’s your constant neck scratching, thankfully levi hasn’t picked up on it

“so you wore purple today?” his eyes linger on the thin straps of your dress and you feel the goosebumps rise up onto your skin immediately

“oh yeahhhh-”

“did i tell you yellow was my favourite colour last week?” he asks holding up a neon yellow pack of crisps and for the first time you see him smile

he looks so ?!|>\€|^ pretty ?!/)/&

wait?? yellow??

“didn’t you say purple?”

“no?” he crosses his arms playfully over his chest thinking for a bit

“maybe i did but no it’s really yellow.” he says as he hands you your bag

nodding your head you smile “yeahhhh sure it is.”

damn, now you’re going to have to find a yellow dress just to make him revert back to purple because who even likes yellow?? that’s a deal breaker right there??

update

it’s been two weeks!!

and a yellow dress has been found and secured B-)

it’s been a pretty rough day at work and you need to desperately collect a pack of green tea and get going

you don’t know when exactly being a secretary meant you had to babysit your boss’ children but that’s what the last week has entailed

being made to work overtime to this extent has had an effect on you and you’re ready to head home as soon as you swing by ackermart

not seeing levi for a week made you a little :-( because to be honest he’s the highlight of your thursday evening BUT!! you’ll be able to see him today at least

walking in through the entrance you’re met with connie smiling right at you, he holds the door open for you and smile back greeting him

“so you didn’t come last week...?”

it’s weird for him to ask that, after all you don’t really speak to anyone here apart from levi, you’re surprised you’re enough of a regular to be known by name

“oh i didn’t think anyone would notice? but yeah i had to work overtime you know what boss’ are like.” groaning you crouch down and look at the pot noodles on display

“i didn’t notice it. boss man did.”

“boss man?” you ask feeling out of loop

“levi.” connie answers as he hops into the backroom

????

isn’t he just a cashier??

“you still look confused.” connie remarks as he heads back out with a cardboard box full of pringle’s tubes

“levi’s the boss man, this is his store. he literally only ever mans the cash register on thursday evening because of you.”

at that you start laughing because it makes no sense at all to you

there’s no way connie is being serious

“good one.” you say as you stand up with a chicken flavored noodle in your hand

“i’m not kidding?”

turning around you give him a skeptical look

he sighs and shakes his head.

“listen. me and the part timers are tired of making bets on when he’ll give you his number and i bet that it would happen today so if you could confess to each other that would be perfect!!!”

“who said i like-”

“anyone with a brain can tell you both like each other.” he’s rolled his eyes so far into the back of his head you begin to take him a little more seriously now

“i... did i make it that obvious??” you’re directly facing him trying to get out as much information as you can

“yeah. very. at least levi wasn’t as bold.”

“i think you’ve got the wrong end of the stick he definitely doesn’t like me.”

connie gives you an “are you fucking with me?” look and you look away trying to distract yourself with the the canned goods lining the shelves

“he was worried sick when you didn’t come in for the entire week. he even asked me if he scared you away.”

“maybe i’m just his favourite customer?”

“favourite customer my ass he has a crush on YOU. confess.”

playing around with the ends of your sleeves connie sees he’s fighting a losing battle unless he gives you definitive solid proof

“please... i’ll get free barbecue if i win the bet and i’m kinda broke rn :-(” okay, you do want connie to eat well and be treated and maybe this is a good thing. if levi doesn’t like you then you can move on!!

“i’ll think about it.”

before connie can continue talking you make a beeline towards the tea aisle whilst throwing a “see you next time!” over your shoulder.

by the time you’ve gathered all of your groceries your basket is full to the brim. you’ve been lingering as much as you can out of fear but you think you’ve collected just enough courage to ask for his number

looking at the cash register levi is sat there and your shoulders slump. he’s probably going to say no and you’re going to look like a huge loser.

right as you’re about to take a step towards him levi finally spots you and gives you one look before standing up from his seat

“hi!” you wave at him

“...hey!” he smiles wide but he bites it back pretending it was never there in the first place

placing your basket in front of him he eyes what you’ve got

“hm... lots of peaches as per usual peaches.” the nickname that rolls of his tongue makes you tremble a little. will he call you that after you fuck everything up with this stupid confession?

his tongue pokes at the inside of his cheek when he gets to the heart shaped box of chocolates

“a gift for a friend? didn’t know you had those?” he teases as he scans the barcode

“gift for a crush!” you reply back enthusiastically as you dig through your wallet looking for your card

levi doesn’t respond for a few seconds and an awkward silence fills the air. you glance up to see him looking at you open mouthed in shock

“good luck.” he murmurs under his breath he’s not even returning your gaze at this point and is hurriedly scanning through your barcodes

“you okay?” you ask worrying about his mood

“yeah, yeah. great.” he’s quieter than usual.

the rest of your encounter is the same, levi silently bags your groceries and you can’t tell if this is a good or bad response.

just as he’s about to place the heart shaped box into your plastic bag you lunge forward holding his wrist to stop him

“no i don’t need those.”

he cocks his eyebrow upwards trying to analyse your expression and gain an understanding of your thoughts

“don’t tell me you’re chickening out. whoever it is will say yes.” he scoffs as he places the chocolates into the bag handing them over to you with a warm smile

there it is again. the fear returns and you swipe your tongue over your slightly dry lips.

no way.

is he telling you to confess to someone now? so he must not like you?

taking the bag away from him you scratch your neck out of habit and huff feeling frustrated

“he keeps giving me mixed signals.” you say hoping he catches your drift

“give him the chocolates and let him put two and two together. don’t even say anything.” his advice would be great if he weren’t the guy you were trying to confess to in real time

nodding you reach into the bag and bring the box back out before gently placing it in front of levi

“are you serious?” he asks and your face drops seeing the possible displeasure in his eyes

great, connie and the part timers just over analysed he doesn’t like you, obviously he doesn’t like you, why would he like you?

without looking back you hurry out, the embarrassment is eating you away now and the thought of ever returning to ackermart isn’t even feasible in your mind

at this point you may as well change your name, identity, dye your hair, have a few children and wear sunglasses the next time you come back so you look like a soccer mum and not the foolish y/n who thought they had a chance with their cute CASHIER???

god, you probably look like a creep

the sound of footsteps can be heard behind you and labored breaths follow before levi calls out for you

“please wait up.” he grumbles. slowing down your pace you let him catch up to you. he grabs at your wrist and sighs in relief

turning you see him savour the air

is this the part where he confesses he likes you too or—

“your receipt you forgot it.” he gasps as he opens your hand for you and places it into your palm

oh.

fingers clasping shut onto the paper you feel the humiliation seep into your pores

this.

is.

the.

worst.

moment.

of.

your.

life.

“open it.” he offer you a boyish smile and your nerves don’t let you find comfort in it

you grimace as you fold it open, you’re imagining he’s charged you an extra £100 for having unwanted feelings for him and if that’s the case you’ll die on the spot

but instead your eyes light up in joy. you’re pleasantly surprised

...

inside of the receipt is his phone number haphazardly sprawled across in black biro - you even double check by comparing it to the number for the customer service helpline

hello??

HELLO.?.!/)£ HIS NUMBER???

“if you just wanted to return the chocolate this is embarrassing.” he’s the one who’s now scratching at his neck and you find that he’s endearing this way

the streetlight from above illuminates him, the shadows cast over his face and his brows aren’t furrowed as they usually are

you open your mouth to reply but connie cuts you off unintentionally. he can be heard YELLING into his phone ecstatic that his plan has worked out

“I WIN!!! HA BBQ’S ON YOU JEAN!! MUST SUCK TO BE YOU.”

you and levi look at each other and laugh, reassuring the other of what has just happened.

well...

you guess this is the start of something new? maybe??

:-)

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sunwoo-hoo · 3 years

Text

↣ the boyz reaction to girlfriend being on her period

↳ a/n: hello lovelies! here it is, my first reaction for the boyz! i honestly feel like this is a continuation to my ‘as your boyfriend’ series. so in each scenario the s/o is already in a relationship with each member. thank you for requesting this anon! i hope you enjoy it. also some of these are a mix of headcanons/scenarios. do not interact if you are under the age of 18.

↳ genre: fluff, light smut?? & humor

↳ requested? yes

↳ send me your requests here!

↳ word count: 1.5k

↳ the boyz x fem reader

「 Lee Sangyeon 」

you were stressed from work having to work overtime so you didn’t even notice you had your period until sangyeon pointed it out before you had to leave

“darling, i think you’ve started your period” he pointed taking a picture of your jeans to show you

you groaned having to deal with one more stressful thing this week

sangyeon rubbed your lower back trying to comfort you

“how about you call in sick?” he asked as you nodded

he’s very sweet giving you anything you need weather its water or adjusting your pillows because of lower back pain

giving you lots of temple kisses

「 Jacob Bae 」

he already knows when your period is going to start having downloaded your period tracking app on his phone

always making sure your fully stocked up on pads and tampons before the day it’s suppose to start

even getting you your favorite snacks that aren’t healthy for you

he just wants to ease the experience as much as possible

when it finally does start he’s rubbing your lower belly kissing your cheek giving you all the praise

“i know it sucks babe, but it’ll be over soon i promise” he murmured

「 Kim Younghoon 」

you period started unexpectedly when you two were watching a movie late at night

you had gotten up to get more popcorn when he noticed the stain on the couch

younghoon called out to you

“sweetheart, are you okay? you’re bleeding” he declared

you quickly went to the bathroom to check and lo and behold he was right

the worst part was that you were in the dorms and they didn’t have any pads or tampons in sight

younghoon noticed your discomfort and quickly went to the 24/7 convenience store getting everything you needed

when he finally came back you asked why it took him so long

he then opened the bag where you saw every brand and size imaginable

“i didn’t know which one you used... so i kind of just bought all of them” he said rubbing the back of his neck awkwardly

you giggled thanking him giving him a small peck on the lips

「 Lee Hyunjae 」

when your period started he was a bit annoyed

mostly because you two couldn’t have sex like you always do

but nevertheless he was caring and respectful

he pretty much gave you everything you needed whether it was medicine for your cramps or something sweet to eat like chocolate

one of your most painful symptoms was your sore breasts

he always offered to rub them but you couldn’t deny the smug look you saw on his face

“don’t worry baby i’ll make you feel better okay?” he said

he starts to rub them in hopes of helping you but eventually he can’t help but suck on your nipple rubbing your other breast with his right hand

your then moaning from pleasure and pain running your fingers through his hair

「 Lee Juyeon 」

juyeon always hated when your period started

one your symptoms was not wanting to be touched so it made him feel very distant from you

even though he wants to be close and cuddle with you he’ll try his hardest giving you space

but it breaks your heart to see him upset so you’ll tell him to cuddle with you regardless of your pain

he’ll lay by you but will try his best not to touch you so that he could respect your boundaries

you grab his hand giving the back of it small kisses thanking him

“i appreciate you being here with me” you whispered

“of course baby, you know i’m always here for you” he promised

「 Kevin Moon 」

you were always a tad bit more emotional when your period started

crying over every little thing

kevin was sympathetic offering anything to tell help you

giving you tissues when you needed it

he tried his best to lift your spirits up playing your favorite songs on his piano

“how can you cry to pharrell williams song happy?” he lightly teased trying to change the shift in mood

wiping your eyes you replied “i don’t know! this sucks! i just want this to be over with already” you snapped

all he could do was wait it out until it was over

during the week he’ll do anything to keep your emotions in check giving you cuddles and kisses

「 Choi Chanhee 」

he’s honestly a bit disgusted by it all but he knows it’s not your fault since it’s just a part of nature

you always tend to break out during your period making you feel really insecure

so you and chanhee end up doing face masks together to keep them at bay

he’s also treating you like a princess

getting everything you can possibly need to make your week smoother

like making sure the heating pad is on so that you can use it whenever you need it

“here love, sit down for a bit, i don’t want you moving a muscle” he insisted

「 Ji Changmin/Q 」

having two older sisters he saw the signs before you did telling you not to overwork yourself

when your period finally appeared you were in constant pain barely even moving

curled up on the bed tightly holding onto the sheets changmin was beside you rubbing your head giving it a kiss

“don’t worry sweetie i’ll get you anything you want okay?”

over the next week he was always keeping tabs on you making sure you had everything you needed

he always made sure to ask if you had extra pads/tampons before you went out to avoid accidents

you couldn’t have been more thankful for him

「 Juhaknyeon 」

you always knew when your period was about to start because you always had trouble sleeping a few days prior

one particular night you and juhaknyeon were sleeping together when you kept tossing and turning

you decided to get up to get a snack feeling a slight tingle in your lower abdomen

sitting on the kitchen island you nearly jumped when you felt juhaknyeon’s arms around you

“you okay baby? i was worried when you weren’t in bed” he said

you smiled softly “yeah.. it’s just i think i’m getting my period soon”

“aw, well you know i’ll be here for whatever you need” he reassured kissing your neck

moving your neck to the side so that he could have better access

is when you felt it, that familiar feeling of wetness in your panties

you then stopped him giving him an apologetic look before he joked

“damn, what a buzzkill”

「 Kim Sunwoo 」

fuck fuck fuck you thought as you looked at your period calendar

you were late

for the most part you were pretty careful when it came to sex with sunwoo but he just couldn’t help but cum in you sometimes

you always made sure to get the plan b pill the next day

but you were thinking a couple of weeks back

did you take it like you were suppose to?

you decided to tell sunwoo the minute he came home from practice

as he walked in through the front door he gave you the biggest of smiles finally seeing the person he loved most in the world

you gave him a worried look before you told him that you needed to talk

“sunwoo... my period, it’s late i-i don’t know why we’re usually safe..” you rambled practically on the verge of tears

his face turned serious grabbing your hands

“let’s go get a test okay? just to be sure” he whispered

once you got the pregnancy test you waited anxiously for the results sunwoo’s hand in yours

“baby i just want you to know that if it’s positive you know i’ll be there for you no matter what, i love you and a positive test won’t change that” he assured you pulling you close giving you a kiss on your forehead

when the test turned out to be negative you couldn’t help but notice sunwoo’s disappointment

a couple of days later your period finally came

「 Eric Sohn 」

usually your energy matched his but when he noticed you were feeling down and sleeping more than usual he was confused

it wasn’t until you told that him that you were on your period he finally realized

he’s definitely calling his mom asking how he could help you in any way he can since he’s not familiar with it

even getting advice from the older members

he’s then giving you everything you need

tea, water, heating pads and a fan since you were sweating

“do you have everything you need babe?” he asked as you nodded padding the bed so that he could lay next to you

he put his arm over you whispering

“goodnight [name], i love you i’ll be right here if you need anything okay?”

you hummed before drifting off to sleep in eric’s arms

✧･ﾟ: *✧･ﾟ:* © sunwoo-hoo 2 0 2 1 ✧･ﾟ: *✧･ﾟ:*

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tojisun · 3 years

Note

I loved how we break! I loved your short blurbs as well continuing on. I just wanted to add that I loved how you also emphasized the importance of his relationship with reader as well, for the both of them. I just wanted to say that I can definitely see her voice being his conscience a lot as well. She did teach him so much about hisself outside of his relationship with Mamaguro. I can see him having an “angel” conscience that he listens to as it guides him and him hearing it speak in readers voice as she was his salvation in a time when he didn’t believe he had one. I can also see reader having his voice in her head as her conscience as well. For example, if there was ever a moment where she felt unsure, she could hear his voice guiding her reminding her not to do anything stupid or etc. I enjoyed how you emphasized the fact that their relationship shaped them both in ways that the ones they have now could have never. I do believe they will be together in another universe because I am a true shipper of them two.☺️

OH MY GOD LOVE, THIS IS SO SOFT AND SO WHOLESOME I LOVE IT SO MUCH!!!

and thank you so, so much!!

as much as toji was crass with leaving the reader for his wife, toji and the reader were kind to each other.

your relationship with toji may not be the same extent as toji’s relationship with his wife, but it was different in ways that mattered: you two understood each other in the way that toji’s wife was unable to. all couples have their shortcomings and that was toji and his wife’s.

and despite having broken up, toji revers you and respects you.

┈┈┈┈┈┈┈┈┈┈┈┈┈

when toji feels like leaving again, not permanently but long enough that it’d leave a hole in his reformed relationship with his wife, he will hear your voice in his head.

“don’t go,” your voice seems to whisper. often he tries ignoring the voice, afraid that if he listens to you he will be conscious of his loss—of your absence. but this time, he caves and he turns to you as though you offer salvation to him. “talk to me her. tell me her what is on your mind, i she will understand you. i she always will.”

and so toji does. he tells his wife that he feels the thrum of chaos running through his veins, hidden underneath the flesh of his palms. he tells her that he feels like if he does not leave, everything they have built will break as punishment. he tells her that he feels like he is putting her and megumi in danger. and she listens. she still does not understand the extent of toji’s pain, but she helps him get through this.

she allows him to leave because if he cannot find peace in their home, then what else can she do but to wait for him? but toji does not leave. he stays and he fights his demons and chases the nightmares away and it is tough, always a constant battle of fear and anxiousness and rage, but her kindness grounds him. her presence reminds him that he is not unlovable. and the storm passes.

(he thinks about you constantly during those painful moments. he rakes his memories of you, anything to get him through the drowning loneliness. he traces the shape of your face and matches his breathing to the pace of yours and he remembers your kind eyes and it helps him remember that he could love as kindly as you—as she—do.)

┈┈┈┈┈┈┈┈┈┈┈┈┈

you are starting your new job, having left the previous one when you’ve uprooted yourself from kawasaki and moved to shinjuku. the hiring process was tedious and you had to do three interviews because of how high demand this position is, but here you are: hired and starting.

it’s terrifying, if you are being honest. you were used to the quaint job you had in kawasaki that was located just five bus stops away from your even quainter apartment. you were used to the familiarity of your tasks and of the travel and of the people, but new beginnings, right?

“you’re the strongest person i know,” toji’s voice says, crushing the nervousness and driving the anxiousness away. you pause, startled at how vivid it sounds. “you always do amazing things.” your breath hitches and your heart stutters, eyes almost blurring as tears seem to pool at your eyes.

“i believe in you.”

you laugh, closing your eyes to savour the gentleness of toji’s ghost that resides in your memories. he is like a mirage, standing in front of you adorning the brightest smile and the kindest eyes. “go,” he says.

“okay,” you tell him.

you open your eyes, pawing at your chest, feeling the calmness of your heart. the fear is replaced with excitement, and when you step out of your door, there is spring in your step.

okay.

┈┈┈┈┈┈┈┈┈┈┈┈┈

[how we break masterlist]

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just-dreaming-marvel · 3 years

Text

Out Of Time ~ 136

MASTERLIST

< previous chapter

Word Count: 2,000ish

Summary: The pregnancy continues. Y/N spends time with Steve. (Read the note at the end of the chapter.)

Warning: car accident

Week 22 was full of compliments from Tony about how Y/N had never looked more beautiful. Her stomach began to get dry and irritated. This led to Tony spending a lot of time rubbing lotion on the baby bump while talking to Morgan.

Week 23 came with worsening symptoms: leg cramps, pregnancy brain, backaches, constipation, and headaches. Y/N was very grateful that Tony was a constant and so very caring. She honestly didn’t know what she would have done without him.

Weeks 24 and 25: Y/N’s sex drive had died, which disappointed the both of them. Tony knew and respected Y/N to know not to push. Her hands also began tingling, which apparently was normal.

Week 26: sleep was definitely not Y/N’s friend. Leg cramps, frequent urination, anxiety, and Morgan’s kicking made it nearly impossible. Tony felt awful, unable to find anyway for Y/N to get rest. A few times, late night drives worked or Tony taking to the bump, but that was few and far between. This left Y/N exhausted and crabby.

Week 27 began with an exhausted Y/N and an intensely worried Tony. They were in the city for Tony to go to a few Stark Industry meetings and so that Y/N could spend some time with Steve.

“Are you sure you’re going to be okay down here alone until Rogers comes and picks you up?” Tony was worrying over Y/N. But he was also worried that, if he was any later to the meeting, Pepper would literally murder him.

“I’ll be fine,” Y/N replied, swatting away Tony from the chair she was in. “I love you. Now go.”

Tony pecked her lips. “Love you girls too.” He started hurrying away. “Make sure to take it easy! Let me know if you need anything!”

“Yeah, yeah,” Y/N muttered, waving at Tony.

As Y/N tried to find a comfortable position in the chair, she could feel something was off. Looking around, no one appeared off. She checked around a few more times before just chalking it up to that half the world had disappeared. Steve arrived lot long later and went inside to meet her.

“Hey, Y/N/N,” he greeted with a smile. “Wow.” He checked her over. “That baby’s really growing.”

“She is,” Y/N responded, smiling softly as she rubbed her belly. “Somedays I can’t believe it and others I just want her out.”

Steve reached his hands out to help his sister out of the chair. She put her hands in his. “My favorite niece giving my sister trouble?”

“Your favorite niece doesn’t let me sleep.” Steve pulled her up, keeping a hold of her while she tried to balance. “It’s kind of getting on my nerves.”

“Maybe her uncle can talk some sense into her today.”

“Please, she’s stopped listening to her father.”

Steve led her out and helped her into the car. Getting in himself, he began the drive to Brooklyn.

“So, I was thinking that we could eat lunch at this diner that’s opened back up in Brooklyn,” Steve suggested. “Then maybe visit the cemetery, visit the parents and AJ?”

“That all sounds wonderful, Stevie,” Y/N responded. “Morgan makes me hungry all the time, so sorry if I spend all your money.”

“Whatever makes my niece, and my sister, happy.”

~~~

Y/N was so picky yet ordered most of the menu. Steve ordered one small thing, thinking to himself that he’d finish up whatever Y/N didn’t. As they waited for their food, Y/N couldn’t help but feel something was off again. She looked around again. Y/N could tell that the other people in there were trying not to stare at the former Avengers, trying not to glare. Studying her surroundings like she was taught, her fingers were anxiously tapping against the table.

“Hey,” Steve called out to her. “You okay?”

“Yeah… Yeah, I’m fine,” Y/N said, swallowing. “It’s just… People hate us. And I don’t blame them. We didn’t protect them like we always sworn to do.”

“Y/N,” Steve reached across and grabbed her hand. “We can’t control them and their thoughts and actions. Only our own.”

“And if they don’t move on?”

Steve sighed. “Then we don’t either.”

~~~

“So, how’s wedding planning coming?” Steve asked once the food arrived.

“Currently, it’s not moving much,” Y/N answered. “I just am exhausted all the time and I can’t even think about trying on a dress right now. I’ve mainly just created several Pinterest boards and such.”

“Well, you two are not in any rush, especially since you’re waiting for little Mo to come.”

“Little Mo?” Y/N giggled. “Is that what you’re going to call her?”

“I figured that, as the uncle, I needed a nickname for my niece.”

“You and Tony can’t just wait for her to come?”

“But it’s still too long of a wait. Like, how many more weeks?”

“I’m week 27 currently, so… I think I technically have 15 more weeks. Ugh, that’s too long! Don’t get me wrong, I have loved growing my daughter inside of me, but I’m tired of it and just want her here.”

“She’ll be here so enough and causing all sorts of problems then too.”

“I guess you’re right… She’s not going to let me sleep for years.”

“Good thing you won’t be doing this alone. You have Tony, Happy, Rhodey, Nat, Pepper, and, like always, you’ll have me.”

“Thanks Stevie. Means a lot.”

~~~

“I bought some flowers, they’re at my place,” Steve stated as they drove away from the diner. “Can we stop there and I can run in and grab them?”

“Of course, Stevie,” Y/N answered. “You mind if I just stay in the car? I’m getting tired.”

“It’s no problem. I’ll be quick.”

“It’s too bad though. I’ve never seen your new place.”

“And I haven’t seen yours.”

“I’ll convince Tony and we’ll have you over soon. Or I’ll convince him to leave and sneak you over. That probably won’t happen until Morgan’s here though. He barely let me do this.”

“He’s just scared and he cares. It’s who Tony is.”

“Yeah, I know. It’s one of the reasons why I love him.”

“I am happy for you. Even after all that’s happened.”

“Thanks, Stevie. I hope that one day you can find something that makes you happy as well.”

Steve shot a tight-lipped smile at his sister before pulling off to the side and parking. He rolled down the windows a bit, pulled out his keys, and opened his door.

“I won’t be long,” he said, heading out the door.

“And I’ll just me here,” Y/N responded.

She sighed, leaning back the seat. Taking off her seatbelt, Y/N closed her eyes and rubbed her baby bump. She was so tired and just wanted to rest, though nothing was allowing her to. Then again, Y/N felt like something was off. Her eyes opened and she began to scan the area. Something was not right, and hadn’t been all day. Sitting up straighter, as much as she could, her breath started quickening. Not able to see anything in front of her, Y/N checked the review mirror. She gasped just before a black suv came barreling into Steve’s car.

Y/N was thrown into the dashboard, causing her to cry out. Steve’s car crashed into the car in front of it. The black suv backed up slightly before ramming into Steve’s car again. This time Y/N’s head it the windshield, cracking it. She screamed.

“P-Pl-Please!” She screamed. “My baby!”

As the black suv backed up again, another one barreled in from the side. This crashed Steve’s car into a lamppost. The window next to Y/N shattered all over her. Her vision was fuzzy from her head’s impact with the windshield and she could tell she had begun bleeding in placed because of the shattered windows.

“Because of you, my family is gone!” She heard someone shout from outside the car. “Because of you have the world is gone!”

“Please! Stop!” Y/N screamed. “Please! I’m pregnant!”

“I’m sure others were as well when they turned to ash!”

Tears were soaking Y/N’s cheeks as she tired to get out of the car. But her door was crushed into the lamppost. Her heart and head were pounding as both cars came at her again. She screamed in agony as something impaled her leg.

“More of you should have died after failing to protect us!” The voice outside the car continued.

The black suv to her side rammed into Steve’s car again, effectively knocking her out cold.

~~~

Steve was whistling as he hurried down the stairs with the flowers. There were two boutiques, one for his parents and one for his nephew. As he exited his building, he froze. His car was totaled and two black suv’s were speeding away.

“Y/N,” he gasped. “Y/N!”

He ran to the car. Y/N was clearly unconscious, leaning against her crushed door. Steve quickly looked over her. She was bleeding, everywhere. Which was terrifying him. Looking for a way to get his sister out, he realized her door was crushed shut and stuck because of the lamppost.

“Y/N, Y/N,” Steve called. “Please answer me. Wake up and answer me.”

When he didn’t get a response, he began to tear things off the car. He needed to get to Y/N, needed to get her out of there before it was too late.

“Mr. Rogers!” An old woman came rushing out of no where. “I’ve called 911! They’re on their way.”

“Thank you, ma’am.” He ripped away the back door, finally.

“They said to wait for them to get her out.”

“Can’t do that. She’s my sister and she’s pregnant.” The sirens were then heard coming towards them.

“Please, Mr. Rogers, they’re almost here. You don’t know what damage you can cause.”

Huffing Steve reached through the shattered window to touch Y/N’s skin. “Stay with me, Y/N. Stay with me.”

~~~

“Where is Y/N?! WHERE IS SHE?!” Steve was sure that Tony’s panic could be heard throughout the whole city. Steve was sitting in the waiting room, head in his hands, as Tony, Happy, and Pepper came running in. “Rogers! Where is Y/N?”

Steve looked up, revealing his puffy red eyes and tear stained cheeks. “She’s—Y/N’s in surgery,” he replied, voice breaking.

“What?! How is she? How’s the baby?”

“She’s— they— I’m so sorry, Tony…”

“Rogers,” Tony growled. “Tell me what—“

“Mr. Stark,” a man called, coming out in scrubs. “I was told you’d arrived. I’m one of the doctors on your fiancé’s case.”

“How is she?” Tony turned to the doctor. “How’s the baby?”

“I’m afraid Miss Rogers was brought in with serious injuries. She was bleeding, quite a lot, and had a serious head injury. The baby was also in clear distress.”

“Clear distress?”

“We had to do an emergency c-section to deliver your baby. She’s currently in surgery as well.” Tony stumbled back, Happy steadying him. “They’re both in critical condition and still have quite a few hours of surgery ahead of us. I’ll keep you updated.”

“Thank you,” Pepper said, as the doctor left.

“Tony, let’s sit you down,” Happy said, guiding Tony down into a seat across from Steve.

“What… happened…?” Tony panted. “I thought you were with her?”

“I needed to grab something, Tony,” Steve responded, clearly feeling all the guilt. “I didn’t think that it would be an issue… I came down from my apartment to see my car completely wrecked against the car in front of it and the lamppost beside it… two black suv’s were speeding away. I didn’t get a good look at them.”

“I can’t— I can’t lose them…”

“I know.”

“If I do… I’m blaming you.”

“Don’t worry, Tony. I’m already blaming myself.”

next chapter >

I leave for Disney World this week. It is the last big family vacation that I will be on for a while. Because of that, I will not be on tumblr March 19th through March 24th. I will actually be deleting the app so that it’s not a distraction.

Most likely, nothing will be posted during that time. If something is, it will have been queued up. Things that are posted while I’m out of town will not have tag lists attached. I will put this note in all the fic posts until then.

So do not come at me for spending time with my family instead of including the tag list. (I say that knowing that people won’t care and still come at me…. be respectful and get over yourself.)

Check out the 2 ending chapter titles and possible banners here.

Also, I will be taking all of April off for job hunting and such. Please be kind and understanding. This is important to me.

If you want to be added to the tag list, please dm me or send in an ask.

#tony stark x reader #steve rogers x reader #the avengers x reader #avengers x reader #marvel x reader #iron man x reader #tony stark imagine #marvel imagine #marvel imagines #avengers endgame #endgame #tony stark #Tony Stark fanfiction #avengers imagine #Iron Man #iron man fanfiction #iron man imagine

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mendespideys · 3 years

Text

rescue | t.h.

pairing: tom holland x lifeguard!reader

warnings: drowning, i guess, although it is definitely not mentioned or described but still. staying under water a lil bit longer than what’s normal?

summary: you’re a lifeguard and when tom is playing in the pool with harrison and stays under for too long, you come to his aid

a/n: soo... apparently this was supposed to be for a writing contest hosted by @sunshinehollandd and @naturallytom that i never finished. oops 🤭

i found it among my 92 drafts and decided to finish it - sort of. It’s more a quick drabble than anything (that i am not proud of) but oh well. at least it’s something, right? so enjoy!

With your brand new sunglasses resting on the bridge of your nose, you settle back into the chair towering above the pool guests. The sun beams down from above, toasting the back of your neck that the umbrella was unable to protect.

The endless laughter from children, the frustrated scolds from parents, and the splashing of the water beneath you blend together into mere background noise. You shift in your seat, fishing out your bottle from your backpack. To be fair, it’s more a block of ice than water, but your throat relishes the few drops that do fall out as you tip the bottle upwards.

While you knew your job needed the upmost level of detail, you no longer felt the constant need to pay attention to every single guest. You had been at this long enough to trust your body to react on its own accord and was nowhere near as uptight as you had been your first day.

Relaxing back into your chair, you let your hidden gaze glide across the people that had taken the trip to your turf today. One of your favorite parts of the job, contrary to what some people might think, was the people watching. There is just something about observing people as they unknowingly go about their day.

Your eyes fall on Mina first. The fourteen year old girl is always there so it comes as no surprise. You watch proudly as she practices her butterfly stroke. Her ceaseless training had done wonders for her technique and you make a mental note to compliment her when she eventually gives up for the day.

There are a few other regulars as well. Mr. and Mrs. Norris; the retired couple that would come every weekend to work on their tans. Sasha; the single mom that also comes every weekend with her twin boys, Adam and George. Mr. Thomas; an older gentleman who seemed to enjoy speaking with you more than the actual swimming part. And then there was Paddy, who had just recently started visiting.

The young freckled boy (teenager, Paddy would correct) seemed to also be practicing his techniques much like Mina. There had been a fair share of conversations between the two of you and you had to admit that you enjoyed his company.

Your eyes land on the two men next to him that he appears to be talking to. You refrain the urge to roll your eyes as you keep watching them, their water fight becoming more intense by the second. Paddy seems to be cheering them on, but you can’t make out his words. Boys.

While water fights are definitely not unusual for you to witness, this is different as the young men look to be about your own age. For some reason unbeknownst to you, you’re unable to tear your eyes away from the two of them. Or, more specifically, the tone back muscles of the brunette with his back to you.

They are both extremely attractive - that truth is undeniable. As their playful fighting becomes physical, you finally catch a glimpse of the brunette. The black sunglass that had been nestled in his wet curls were knocked off and long forgotten the second they came in contact with the chlorinated water.

Your brows perked with amusement as you kept your eyes on the two. A little entertainment in an otherwise mundane work day didn’t hurt, right? The brunette almost effortlessly hops onto the blond’s back, a non-threatening chokehold around his neck. The overpowering does not last for long and before either you or him, it seemed, could anticipate it, the blond had successfully knocked him off and into the water.

The blond surfaced rather quickly, a triumphant grin dancing on his lips. You chuckled to yourself quietly, anxiously waiting for the attractive brunette to resurface as well. You were rather curious about how he would handle his loss. However, as a few more seconds pass and still no brown locks to be seen, you’re in full lifeguard mode.

You’re on autopilot. You had trained for years and while you rarely had to actually utilize your skills, it did happen occasionally. Your body doesn’t even react to the temperature difference as your toasted skin comes in contact with the chilled water. You make your way over to the small group in record time, grabbing ahold of the brunette’s arm just as he seems to make his way back up.

His coughs enter your ears as soon as you pull him to the surface and toward the edge of the pool. You’re well-aware of the small audience you have, feeling the burns of their curious stares, but ignore them dutifully and get back to the situation at hand.

He seems to be conscious enough and helps you out by hoisting himself up on the ledge. You pretend not to notice the way his toned biceps tense as he does so. You quickly hoist yourself up as well, the sun immediately resuming its toasting the minute your body is out of the water.

You offer a rather pathetic pat on the back as his ceaseless coughs continue. Eventually, he’s able to halt his coughing, his chest heaving as he tries to get enough air into his lungs without irritating his throat again.

“Are you okay?” you question, hiding your worry behind the professionalism you had adopted summers ago. “See, this is why lifeguards typically frown upon fighting in the water. Playfully or not.”

He nods, finally turning to meet your eyes. You choke down the gasp that involuntarily made its way up your throat. His brown orbs sparkle in the sun and you are immediately mesmerized by their beauty. Still, the way the embarrassment that had been swimming within them was replaced by shock and curiosity the moment they met your gaze didn’t go unnoticed by you.

“I-I’m good,” he brown-eyed man responds, swallowing thickly. The corner of his mouth turns upward as he runs a slightly unsteady hand through his wet curls. “Thanks for coming to my rescue.”

“Well, it is my job,” you retort, a playful smile settling on your lips. “Your poor fighting technique was amusing, so I was already watching.”

“You sure that’s the only thing you were watching, darling?” He’s full-on smirking now and you, once again, refrain from rolling your eyes at his childish antics.

“Y/N!”

You turn toward the familiar voice, watching with curious eyes as Paddy swims toward the two of you, the older blond hot on his heel. The freckled teen looks between you and the brunette, not even bothering to hide his amusement. His gaze lands on the brunette who looks at him expectantly.

“This is why I’m the swimmer and you’re the actor, Tom,” Paddy snorts.

Tom. So that was his name.

“Well, Pads, if I had known you were here hanging out with - Y/N, was it? - almost everyday then maybe I’d be here more often and would be a better swimmer.”

thanks for reading! i haven’t been on here in forever and i don’t know if you want to be on the taglist anymore, so let me know if you want to be taken off 🤓

@tomhollanders2013 // @people-leadingcauseofstress // @lucille-lovely-blog // @twinklestqr // @big-booty-judyy // @tomshufflepuff // @all-black-darling // @whyisbuckysodelicious // @winning-raffl-ticket // @goldenmarvelgirl // @lovethyfandoms2 // @caitsymichelle13 // @itsthwippingtime // @tony-stank3 // @lauras-collection // @iamcalledsteph // @spideyboix // @heyquackson// @ameliathackray // @clara-licht // @sltwins // @amberboo329 // @heroes-die-young // @turtoix // @in-a-lot-of-fandoms-tbh // @masintahin // @bbynessaxo // @greenarrowhead // @mendes-marvel // @heycutiepatooty // @addictofharry // @simplycute-98 //

#tom holland #tom holland drabble #tom h #tom holland oneshot #tom holland one shot #tom holland one-shot #tom holland x reader #tom holland x you #tom holland x y/n #tom holland blurb #tom x you #tom x reader #harrison osterfield #tom holland imagine #tom h imagine #lifeguard au #lifeguard!reader #tom holland au

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tavern-aa · 4 years

Text

Haikyuu Captains as Boyfreinds

Includes: Daichi, Kuroo, Bokuto, Oikawa, Ushijima

Warnings: slight cursing, bokuto emo-mode, slight nsfw

A/N: Leviathan reporting!! This is the first headcannons/anything we’ve got up so if you want to make requests, go for it. <3<3<3

Male! Reader

Daichi Sawamura

When you first got together, he was extremely awkward. It wasn’t his first relationship, but it was his first time dating a guy.

He was very shy about pda.

You started going out in the middle of your second year in highschool

Now, nearing the end of your third year he is a lot more confident is your relationship.

He loves to show off whenever you’re at his games. Whether it be flexing or literally throwing himself across the court for a receive, this man is doing it for you and only you.

Third year comes around and you are so proud to be dating the captain. He won't say it often but he PREENS when you call him by his title.

If he wins a game, you better believe he’s waiting anxiously for you to appear before him so he can squeeze the life out of you with a bear hug. He’s so happy and he loves that you’re here with him to share in the happiness.

If he loses he doesn’t have to wait. You’re down by the court already, running over to him to console him after his loss. He’s the captain, his team can’t see him cry, but you know better and as soon as everyone is settled you sweep him away and hold him close, brushing away the small tears that might fall down his face.

On a regular school day, being in different classes makes it slightly difficult to see each other, but lunch time is always a blessing for the two of you. You’ll sit with him, Sugawara and Asahi and have the time of your life.

He likes to buy small presents for you whenever he can. If he sees something and it reminds him of you, he buys it.

Whenever you come over, he likes to cuddle with you, whether it be on the couch, on the floor, or on either of your beds. He just loves feeling you wrapped up in his arms. And you love it too, it makes you feel safe and secure.

In public, he keeps the pda to a minimum, but he loves to place his hand on the small of your back or have your hands intertwined together to signal that you are in fact, together.

If someone decides to stare at you two or make rude comments about being two men, he’ll immediately pull you away to somewhere else, but he’ll definitely make a mental note of how this person looked so he could hunt them down later on.

He doesn’t really mind your being friends with the other volleyball club third years, but as soon as the second years come into the mix, he has his hesitations. He just doesn’t want his little bird to be influenced by the ruffians Tanaka and Nishinoya.

At the end of the day, this man is the most loving and caring boyfriend you could ask for. He’s understanding and even if you end up fighting he’s going to be the one to apologize first. He loves you too much for him to allow you to stay mad at him.

This man loves you with all his heart and even if your being a man drives away all the people in his life due to their bigoted opinions, he will stay by your side and love you forever.

Tetsurou Kuroo

Okay so, this guy, mmph.

I love him so much.

As a boyfriend though, he’s kinda silly.

This man is a big volleyball nut as we all know, but sometimes he finds it hard to separate volleyball from his personal life.

The way you started dating was strange. You confessed to him, which is normal, but he didn’t really respond, he just kissed you out of nowhere, pulled back and made a face as if he were mulling over how it was. He then shrugged and said okay to your confession.

He’s not exactly romantic but he tries his best, he really does.

When you come to his games, he is already showing off, knowing you’re watching him.

He likes to tease you a lot, if you’re shorter than him he’ll rest his elbow on your head and lean on you, usually in the middle of conversation with other people. If you’re taller than him, he likes to call you silly names like “beanpole” or “giant”.

If the teasing ever gets to you, he isn’t very empathetic. He’ll just scoff and say he was playing and not really take your feelings into account. He knows he’s being mean and that his response is wrong, but he doesn’t care, he’s trying to think about next weeks game.

You’ve known each other since you were kids so that also plays a big role in your relationship. You and Kenma are best friends and whenever Kuroo upsets you, he’s the first person you’re going to.

Kuroo doesn’t like to admit that he’s the jealous type, but whenever he sees you crying to Kenma instead of him it pisses him off. Like, he’s the one you confessed to so why aren’t you crying to him? Boy doesn’t realize that you’re crying about him.

This is how it is goes for most of your high school dating years.

After highschool he calms down a lot and he starts to realize how he’s been treating you. One day, once you both have started college, he sits you down and just starts apologizing for how he's been treating you and all the things he’s said and done to you and not taken into account your feelings.

He’s much better now and he definitely likes to show you off to his friends. When you met Bokuto for the first time, Kuroo was immediately very protective of you. He knew Bokuto was a good guy but he was very touchy with his friends and new people and Kuroo just didn’t want him touching you.

Kuroo likes to give you small gifts and treat you to dinner whenever he can because he really does love you, he just has a hard time expressing it.

You two share a dorm during college, one of the lucky things with you both being guys.

The room is almost always messy because of Kuroo’s inability to keep things clean but you live with it...mostly. You make him clean and even if he whines you pay him with kisses for doing little things like picking up his clothes, or throwing the instant ramen cups away.

You only use one of the beds in the room because of his constant need for cuddles and affection.

He wasn’t a good boyfriend in highschool but in college he is truly trying to make up for it. He’s showing you how much you mean to him and treating you like a king, no, like a god. He worships you.

Koutarou Bokuto

He’s a big cuddle bug btw, his beefy arms make great pillows if you ever want to hug him.

He loves to hold you in his arms, no matter where or when or what the situation he is in.

You are in different classes, but that does not stop this man from spending as much time with you as possible.

He’s actually the one who confessed to you which shocked his entire team, especially when he introduced you to them and they didn’t see a small petite girl but a full fledged dude.

Akaashi and you get along well enough to the point where when you hang out with him it makes the captain slightly jealous.

“Y/N-chan, do you not love me anymore? Do you like Akaaaaashi better than me?”

Big cry baby if he doesn’t get his daily kisses and hugs from his cute little boyfriend. “It’s kissy time Y/N-chan~.”

He constantly needs help fixing his hair and he always asks for your help because now he has you to depend on.

He isn’t really one to buy small gifts for you by himself, but if you want something he will either immediately buy it for you or will later go back to the shop by himself and purchase whatever it is you wanted.

Big food nut, so if you know how to cook, he will love you forever (not that he doesn’t already).

When he introduced you to his parents, he was very nervous because not only were you a guy, but you were also the first person he had ever introduced to his family. His parents were a little skeptical at first but once they got to know you they treat you like their own son and constantly invite you over for dinner.

He’s bad with numbers so don’t expect him to remember important dates like anniversaries, but he remembers birthdays really well. In fact, he likes to go all out with a surprise party and gifts galore just to spoil his baby.

Whenever he goes into his emo-mode during games, the team will tell him that you’re in the stands watching him and cheering him on. He’ll immediately perk up and search for you knowing you’re always in the front row for him and lock eyes with you. Give him a little wave and a loud cheer and he’ll give his signature “HEY HEY HEY” and win the game just for you.

Tooru Oikawa

Tooru is another one of those guys who has a hard time separating their personal life from volleyball and that puts a huge strain on your relationship.

He is a big volleyball nut but fun fact, so are you!! being on the team together at first seemed like a great idea, but as soon as you realized that this man’s life seriously revolves around volleyball day and night, the actual romantic portion of your relationship started to lack.

Whenever you made plans to meet up or go on a date, he would spontaneously either forget or something would “come up”. Truth be told, this nerd seriously lost track of time with practice.

Don’t get him wrong, he loves you to the moon and back, but it’s hard to maintain a relationship with him because of his inability to change.

You have gone through many breaks with him but each time he comes back swearing that he’ll change and that he will try to be better and hang out with you more.

That doesn’t last very long. He always falls back onto his bad habits.

He especially does NOT like it when you worry about him over working himself and over working his knee. You see him during practice every day, sometimes struggling only a little, and other times struggling a lot. It’s difficult to watch him destroy himself for such an unforgiving sport.

When he IS able to make time for you, it’s usually later at night. He likes to take you to the park or by the river and lay on the grass to stargaze with you *cough* alien watch *cough*.

Even though he has his quirks, everyone does and he loves that you accept him for who he is with all his flaws. He might not be the best boyfriend all the time, and it might seem like he is neglecting you, but he really is trying his best to be good for you.

Volleyball matches are a trip with Tooru. He wants to make sure before every match that you know he loves you by giving you a bone crushing hug. He’ll shout during the drills that he loves you, even at the price of Iwaizumi giving him a hit to the head. It’s worth it every time.

He loves when he’s on the sidelines and he gets to watch you play, no matter what position you play.

He also loves to show you off to your team, like he loves PDA at practice. If the opportunity arises, he will be hugging you, kissing you, or touching you in some way shape or form.

Wakatoshi Ushijima

Ushiwaka is an enigma honestly. How anyone is able to date him is a mystery, one of the great wonders of the world.

Not that he’s a bad boyfriend, it’s just surprising he agreed to date anyone when he’s so focused on volleyball and school.

He’s a very stoic person so sometimes it’s hard to know what he’s thinking and even if you ask him, he sounds so monotone that you aren’t sure if he means what he’s saying.

His expressions are hard to read and that makes understanding him that much harder.

He’s not big on PDA in public or in private but if you really want to, when you two are hanging out in either of your rooms, he’ll let you sit in his lap and cuddle with him.

He likes it when you pet his hair while cuddling together. It calms his thoughts and soothes his muscles. You are a big stress reliever for him.

Your size difference is one of Ushi’s favorite things about you. Whenever you put your head on his chest, he makes this face of absolute bliss, though it’s not actually noticeable unless you’re someone extremely close to him.

Ushi likes to attempt to teach you how to play volleyball, if you are a slow learned he takes his time teaching you how to do things. He’s very patient with you and makes you feel good about yourself by constantly reassuring you. If you’re a fast learner or already know how to play he likes to make things a little competitive between the two of you by making bets and saying things like, “If you can manage to receive my serve, I’ll buy you bread for a week,” or “if I can block your spike, then you have to give me 100 kisses.”

He’s a lot softer than people really expect of him, especially for his baby boy. When it’s just the two of you, he will talk to you in a soft, gentle voice that truly sends shivers up your spine. It’s so soothing.

Satori can be kind of a cockblock sometimes when it comes to things getting even remotely intimate between the two of you. He randomly will come into the room at the worst times.

Ushi seems like a stoic machine but he is human just like everyone else and he loves you so damn much. You are his baby, his cinnamon apple, the love of his life, even if he not great at expressing himself. You light up his day by just existing, his baby boy.

#haikyuu x male reader #haikyuu!!#haikyuu #haikyuu captiains #haikyuu!! x male reader #ushijima #daichi #oikawa #kuroo #bokuto #ushijima x male reader #daichi x male reader #oikawa x male reader #kuroo x male reader #bokuto x male reader

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writerofthecourt · 4 years

Text

memories of what could have been

pairing: miya atsumu x reader

summary: seeing you in the stands, atsumu couldn’t help but think back on how your relationship got to this point

warning: inarizaki vs. karasuno spoilers, time skip spoilers

a/n: this was supposed to be short and sweet…what happened?? i’m sorry for any missed editing mistakes. inspired by this song by ito kashitaro. please give it a listen to after you’re done reading, it is such a good song!

The audience watched in nervous silence, waiting with bated breath as Atsumu stepped up to the line and prepared for his serve. The game had dwindled down to its final set, leaving both teams exhausted and sore from the constant rallies and unforgiving plays. If Atsumu could land a service ace now, it would mean the end of the game and victory for his team.

Looking at his teammates, Hinata and Bokuto both smiled at him encouragingly, while Sakusa’s glare told him not to mess up. Looking up to the stands, Atsumu found you in the sea of people, your lips curved into a radiant smile as you shot him a reassuring thumbs up.

Finding strength in the people around him, Atsumu released a shaky breath before tossing the ball up into the air, jumping after it to launch it into the opponent’s side of the court.

“Can I play?” a tiny voice asked from behind him.

Catching the ball that Osamu had just received, Atsumu turned around and raised a condescending eyebrow at you, his eyes scanning you with disdain and disinterest as you stared back at him with anticipation.

“No way,” he scoffed. “This isn’t a game for scrubs like ya.”

“That’s not very nice,” you replied, a frown now present on your face. “My ma told me that ya should be kind and share with everyone.”

“Yeah? And my ma told me not to talk with strangers,” Atsumu made a shoo-ing motion with his hands, “now go and play in the sandbox with the rest of the scrubs.”

Scrunching your nose in frustration, you stomped off towards the swing set where you had been previously occupying your time. “Jerk…”

Smirking in victory, Atsumu returned to receiving the ball back and forth with Osamu, letting out a gasp of surprise when the ball bounced off of his arm and went flying towards your direction.

“Oi, watch out!” Atsumu shouted to warn you.

Turning around, you quickly surveyed the ball before taking off into a running start. Jumping up into the air, you perfectly spiked the ball back to Atsumu, hitting him in the face as you gracefully landed on your feet.

“Wow,” you drawled out sarcastically with a smirk. “Sorry, my hand slipped.”

Osamu, who had been quiet up until this point, let out an uncontrollable laugh as Atsumu continued to groan on the ground, his face now red from where the volleyball had smacked him.

That was how you met Miya Atsumu.

The classroom was filled with hushed excitement as everyone anxiously waited in their seats for the lunch bell to ring. Today was Valentine’s Day, and all the students were once again ready to celebrate and revel in the traditions of the romantic holiday.

As soon as the bell rang, various female students ran up to Atsumu’s desk, showering him in a variety of wrapped and decorated chocolate confections. Despite only being second years, the Miya twins were the talk of their junior high, as their superior looks and athleticism made them the envy and desire of the student population, whether they wanted to be or not.

Looking over his large pile of gifts, Atsumu glanced at his brother from across the classroom, finding some sort of comfort in how Osamu also seemed to be struggling with his own horde of adoring fans.

“Atsumu-kun, please accept my chocolates.”

“I worked really hard on these, so please accept my feelings, Atsumu-san!”

“Atsumu-kun, are ya going out with anybody right now?”

“Oh, shuddup!” Atsumu snapped as he stood up from his desk, causing everyone to stare at him with surprise and fear. “I just wanna go out and play volleyball, but none of ya will let me leave!”

The girls around Atsumu’s desk quickly shrank back, some shuffling their feet in awkwardness, while others hid behind their friends.

“Yer a real jerk, y’know that?” Osamu sighed, shaking his head at his brother’s lack of tact.

“What did’ja say, ‘Samu? Say it to my face!”

Noticing movement from the door, Atsumu saw the top of your head peeking out from behind the door frame, your body obstructed from view due to the large number of female students standing outside of the classroom.

“Oi, [Y/N],” Atsumu called out, causing you to jump in surprise. “Come play volleyball with me and ‘Samu.”

“Uhh, sure,” you agreed nervously as some of the other girls began to glare at you. “I have something I gotta do first. I’ll see ya out on the field.”

“Sounds good!”

Turning around, you scurried down the hallway and rushed back into your classroom, hiding your box of chocolates away in the depths of your school bag.

Your friend, who sat in the desk behind you, raised an eyebrow at your suspicious behaviour. “I thought ya were gonna go confess to Atsumu-san? Ya said that’cha worked all night on those chocolates.”

“Haha, yeah. I’m chickening out,” you shamefully admitted, rubbing the back of your neck. “He was a little busy…”

“Figures,” your friend scoffed, rolling her eyes at your cowardice.

“Yeah. Good thing I bought those extra store bought chocolates, right?” you chuckled, trying to ease the pain. “Now it won’t be awkward if I only give ‘Samu his chocolates.”

Your friend sighed before shaking her head in pity. “I don’t know why ya fell for that idiot in the first place.”

“Yeah, me too,” you whispered, remembering all of the effort you had put into your chocolates the night before.

At the simple age of fourteen, you experienced your first heartbreak.

It was a tough pill to swallow, but it was the truth. Nobody expected a powerhouse team like Inarizaki to lose in their first match of the Spring High National Tournament, but Karasuno was an incredible team, managing to secure the victory after a tremendous three set game.

Days following the tournament, a sombre atmosphere could still be felt lingering in the halls of Inarizaki High. The third year volleyball club members were now retired, turning to focus their attention on studying and entrance exams instead. They would still occasionally show up to practice and mentor their first and second years, but it was clear that their time in their beloved club was over. Everyone was heartbroken, but no one was more upset about the team’s loss than one blond setter.

“Hey,” you greeted Osamu as he opened the front door. “How are ya holdin’ up?”

“Fine,” Osamu replied with a shrug. “Definitely a lot better than ‘Tsumu.”

You nodded solemnly, entering the quiet house and exchanging your outdoor shoes for a pair of house slippers. “Are yer parents not home?”

“Visiting family,” Osamu answered plainly, tearing open a bag of chips to snack on them. “Want some?”

Shaking your head, you politely declined his offer. After a moment of silence, you shuffled your feet and glanced up the staircase. “I’m gonna go check up on him.”

As you began to climb the stairs, Osamu called out your name, making you turn back to look at him. “Thanks. For being there when I can’t.”

You smiled, nodding to Osamu before letting your feet carry you through the familiar hallways of the Miya household. Soon, you reached your destination, stopping right in front of the twins’ bedroom door.

Gently knocking on the door, you alerted Atsumu of your presence. “‘Tsumu? It’s me. I’m coming in, okay?”

Hearing a grunt of acknowledgement, you entered the room before softly closing the door behind you. Shaking your head, you sighed at all of the clothes and manga books messily strewn about the room. Typical teenage boys.

There, securely wrapped in his blanket from head to toe, Atsumu lay on his bed, his back facing towards you as he stared off at the wall in complete silence.

“Hey,” you greeted softly, taking a seat next to him on the bed. “‘Samu says that yer not holdin’ up too well. Are ya okay?”

“I don’t wanna talk about it,” Atsumu mumbled, his nose stuffy and voice grating as if he had been previously crying.

“It’s okay if ya don’t want to talk about it,” you conceded, bringing a hand up to brush through Atsumu’s messy blond locks.

After a few minutes of silence, sniffles could be heard echoing throughout the room as Atsumu tried his best to muffle his cries into his pillow. With a melancholic smile, you continued to rake your fingers through Atsumu’s hair, staring out at the window to bask in the glow of the setting sun.

“Everything will be okay, ‘Tsumu,” you gently whispered. “You’ll be okay…”

Outside of the room, Osamu smiled as he heard your comforting words to Atsumu. He felt content knowing that the blond would be just fine now that you were here.

“Ahhh, I can’t believe we’re done!” you shouted in excitement, your eyes gleaming as you admired the piece of paper you had sacrificed three years of your life to obtain.

“Yer so loud,” Osamu grimaced as he stood to your left. Though, he also broke out into a smile once he saw how the happy expression on your face never wavered.

Graduation was both a joyous and scary occasion, as students now set off on their own paths towards an undecided future. Although nothing was certain, you weren’t scared. You were ready to take on whatever life threw at you.

“Hey, Osamu, come take a picture with us!” a couple of guys from the baseball club requested, shaking their phones for emphasis.

Shrugging his shoulders, Osamu left your side as you waited for Atsumu to finish his conversation with a couple of his female fans.

After snapping a quick photo with them, Atsumu waved his fans goodbye and walked over to stand next to you underneath one of the school’s cherry blossom trees.

“God, they’re so annoying. ‘Miya-san, yer so cool. We’re gonna miss ya so much!’” Atsumu poorly imitated, his voice rising to an absurdly high pitch in an effort to mimic their voices.

“Yer awful!” you laughed, shoving his shoulder once he was within arm’s reach.

“Yeah, yeah. Tell me something I don’t know,” he smirked before glancing around. “Where’s ‘Samu?”

“Pictures,” you said, pointing to Osamu and a group of boys off in the distance.

“Ughhhh,” Astumu groaned, glaring at his brother with impatience.

As the two of you waited for Osamu to be done, a comfortable silence enveloped you and Atsumu. The hushed chatter of other students could be still heard as they all ran around, saying goodbye to one another and wishing each other good luck for the future. You looked up to the sky and smiled, admiring how the cherry blossoms danced with the gentle breeze of spring.

“I’ve been in love with ya since junior high, did’ja y’know that?” you asked, grinning once you saw the look of absolute shock painted on Atsumu’s handsome face.

“W-what-” Atsumu sputtered, not knowing what to say in response to your confession.

“Calm down, ya look like yer gonna choke or something,” you chuckled.

“Why are ya telling me this now?” Atsumu asked seriously, staring at you with a look that you couldn’t quite decipher.

Shrugging your shoulders, you answered Atsumu’s question. “Why not? It doesn’t change anything. Yer still gonna be moving to Osaka to try out for the MSBY Black Jackals, ‘Samu’s gonna be studying here, and I’m heading off to Tokyo. I just wanted to get this off my chest after all these years.”

“I-I’m sorry,” Atsumu reluctantly looked away, “I don’t feel the same way about you.”

“I know,” you said as you took a hold of his hand, ignoring how he seemed to flinch at your touch. “A part of me kinda hoped that you’d return my feelings and move with me to Tokyo, but that’s just a far-fetched dream. Besides, I’d never want to make you choose between me and volleyball.”

“[Y/N], I’m sorry-”

“Will you stop it!” you playfully snapped, rolling your eyes at the Miya Atsumu’s sudden shyness. “It’s fine. I’ve come to terms with my feelings a long time ago. No matter what, at the end of the day, I’ll still love both you and ‘Samu all the same.”

Hearing your parents call out your name, you turned to where they stood as they signalled for you to meet them at the car parked a couple of blocks down the street.

“Okay!” you confirmed as you waved to them. Turning back to Atsumu, you planted a soft kiss on the corner of his mouth, surprising him as you shot him one last smile. “Goodbye for now, ‘Tsumu. I’ll see ya when I see ya.”

Atsumu could do nothing but stare as you ran off towards Osamu, interrupting the photo-taking as you hugged the ex-wing spiker before kissing him on the cheek and bidding him your farewells. The other guys around Osamu all whistled and hollered, but he just rolled his eyes at their lighthearted teasing.

Returning your hug, Osamu kissed the top of your head, saying his goodbyes to you as well before whispering something only you could hear. Both of your eyes drifted to Atsumu before you nodded your head and separated from the grey haired Miya. Waving to Osamu and Atsumu one last time, you ran off to catch up with your parents.

As Atsumu watched you leave, the blond clenched his fist tightly around his shirt, right where his heart would be. An indescribable feeling began to settle in his chest, and he couldn’t help but feel as if he would regret it for the rest of his life if he didn’t chase after you.

Nevertheless, Atsumu’s feet remained firmly planted on the ground.

“Miya-san, you are one of the rising stars in the world of volleyball right now. Looking at your career up until this point, I can easily understand why so many new players see you as a figure of inspiration,” the interviewer complimented, a professional and polite smile on her face as she held up her microphone. “Tell me, is there anyone that inspires you to work hard and continue to do your best?”

“That’s a tough question,” Atsumu replied, sending the interviewer and camera a charismatic smile. “Well, if I had to choose…”

Looking back on his life, the first person that came to Atsumu’s mind was you. Like a lantern shining in the darkest of nights, your smiling face was the first one to appear in the setter’s head.

Suddenly, memories of you all came flooding back to him, especially that one fateful day underneath the cherry blossom tree where you had confessed your feelings to him.

“Uh, Miya-san?” the interviewer asked, snapping him out of his daze. “Are you all right?”

“Um, yeah, sorry. It’s been a long day,” he chuckled, earning a laugh from the interviewer as well. “Sorry, what was the question again?”

The interviewer only smiled as she repeated her question.

“Yer going on a date?!” Atsumu screeched, pulling at his hair as if he had just heard the worst news ever. He was currently on a Facetime call with you and Osamu, with your phone aimed towards your closet as you shifted through and appraised different outfits with the twins.

“Uh, yeah, that’s what I said,” you confirmed, rolling your eyes at blond’s overreaction. “Now, which shirt looks better, the yellow one or the white one.”

“I personally like the white one,” Osamu replied, quickly glancing up from his laptop before resuming his essay.

“Since when? With who?” Atsumu interrogated, glaring suspiciously at you through the phone screen.

“A guy from my Intro to Biology class. He seems really nice, so I accepted his offer,” you explained with exasperation. “It’s just coffee, ‘Tsumu.”

“Just coffee?!” the blond asked hysterically. “This is Tokyo we’re talking about! We all know how sketchy those city boys are!”

“‘Tsumu, it’s just one date,” you sighed, no longer having the energy to deal with him. “Listen, if it goes poorly, I’ll block his number and never interact with him ever again. Deal?”

“Fine,” Atsumu relented, grumbling something under his breath that you couldn’t quite pick up. “But call me or ‘Samu as soon as you get home! If I don’t hear from ya by the end of the night, I’m going to Tokyo myself!”

“I’ll be fine, ‘Tsumu,” you chuckled before glancing at the time. “Okay, I gotta go. We’re meeting up soon. See ya, guys!”

“Bye.” “Be safe!”

Hanging up the call, Atsumu let his head fall back onto the couch, his fists shaking with frustration. He didn’t like you, at least not in that way. So why did he feel jealousy and disappointment burning away at his chest when you had announced to him and Osamu that you were going on a date?

Thinking back to graduation day, Atsumu couldn’t help but wonder if he truly did feel nothing for you back then. In any case, he couldn’t deny that the thought of you now stirred up something within his heart.

He hated himself for it, but he hoped that your date was a total disaster. That he’d be there to comfort you and rekindle whatever feelings you had for him back in high school.

Unfortunately, Atsumu never got his chance.

As the ball flew through the air, the opponent’s libero made a desperate dive to reach it. Unfortunately, his efforts were not enough, as the ball landed just out of his arm’s reach, so close, yet so far away from being stopped.

The whistle sounded, declaring the end of the game as the crowd erupted into both cheers of happiness and groans of disappointment. Atsumu’s teammates all ran up to quickly hug him, with Hinata and Bokuto being the first ones to reach the tired setter. Sakusa looked at the three of them with disgust, but he still sent Atsumu a small smile, telling him that he did good.

Atsumu laughed as Bokuto kept slapping him on the back, while Hinata congratulated him for his amazing serve. Looking up to the stands one more time, Atsumu chuckled as you sent him a beautiful smile and an enthusiastic wave of both hands, the shine of your wedding band reflecting off of the stadium lights.

“Y-yer gettin’ married?”

“Yeah! Isn’t this great, ‘Tsumu?”

“Y-yeah! This is wonderful, [Y/N]. I wish ya nothing but all the happiness in the world…”

Turning to your husband beside you, you began to excitedly talk about all the amazing players and the various highlights of the game. Your husband must have said something funny because you started to laugh, kissing him on his cheek before leaning into his chest with a hug.

Atsumu turned away from the happy couple, half-listening to the praises of his teammates. He had never once regretted his decision in pursuing volleyball, but he couldn’t help but think back to that fateful spring day.

If he had accepted your feelings back then, would he be the one that you were hugging right now? The one that got to see your dazzling smile and hear the twinkle of your laughter every morning?

Atsumu loved volleyball, but he also loved you.

He was just too late in realizing this fact.

fun fact: osamu was originally going to end up with [y/n], but i liked the idea of them remaining as friends a lot better. [y/n]’s husband is a canon haikyuu character, so if anyone can guess who he is, i’ll write you a request

EDIT: an anon has correctly guessed that it was konoha

#miya atsumu x reader #atsumu x reader #haikyuu imagines #haikyuu reader insert #haikyuu scenarios #miya osamu #miya atsumu #haikyuu spoilers

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azucanela · 4 years

Text

SOME WORDS ARE BETTER LEFT UNSAID

SUMMARY: In which there is an unspoken agreement between everyone not to discuss the clear chemistry between the manager and the captain of the Nekoma Volleyball Club. Until one day one of them gets tired of the silence.

WORD COUNT: 1.7K

WARNINGS: trust issues, denial, insecurities, everyone needs a hug, angst?

A/N: please excuse any errors made i wrote this at 4AM, but hey creative juices are flowing during the oddest hours of the day so. also our king kenma makes an appearance so its worthy reading i swear

There was an unspoken agreement between the notorious manager of the Nekoma Volleyball Club, and the Captain. Though her beauty rivaled that of the Karasuno manager, no one addressed it purely because they knew the way Kuroo Tetsuro looked at her. No matter how many movies there are about unspoken feelings, none of them could compare to these two. The shared looks as they sat in class, bored. Kuroo would make sure she was eating properly, she would ensure he was staying hydrated when staying after school for Volleyball. Kuroo helped her pass any and every science class by tutoring her when necessary, she helps him pass his foreign language class. The texts, the late night calls, the times when one would ask the other to come over and they would, no questions asked. Taking care to slip out of the other’s bed at 4AM to make sure they didn’t get caught. Silent, intimate moments.

Kuroo was sitting on the couch, flicking through channels, moving between Netflix and Hulu in search of something good to watch. She was making popcorn when he got bored and left his seat on the couch to enter the kitchen, leaning his shoulder against the wall to watch her movements. She was slicing fruit, and a block of cheese waited next to the cutting board as she did, waiting for the popcorn to finish. Her hair was down, and she was wearing one of his shirts. It was oversized on her, covering her thighs. He was smiling as he moved from his spot against the wall up behind her, wrapping his arms around her waist and burying his head into her neck. She hummed in response, leaning back into him as she continued to cut the fruit.

For a moment, he could pretend that they weren’t just friends. Because this definitely is not something friends do. Friends don’t hold hands, much less hold each other, they don’t look at each other the way Kuroo looked at her, they don’t care for eachother, not like this.

“Are they dating?”

He’d get asked this question constantly. Kenma would always shake his head, tell them no, they aren’t. Though they are most certainly two of the most in love people he knows. His best friends weren’t even dating, and yet he still felt like the third wheel. How ironic. Now Kenma wasn’t one to interfere with the lives of others, but it was getting ridiculous, so he tried to get involved, once.

He didn’t bother looking up from his game as he asked, “Why don’t you tell Kuroo how you feel?” Pausing only once to gauge Y/N’s reaction.

She didn’t seem startled, or shocked, in fact, she laughed, “I don’t like Kuroo, silly.” Y/N had told him. “He and I are just close friends, besides you know I’m not looking for a relationship.” She had mentioned this in the past, most people assumed it was because she had feelings for Kuroo. Smart people knew it was because she had feelings for Kuroo.

Kenma raised a brow, “you both act like you two are in a relationship.” Was his response, putting his game down, “and it hurts him because he knows it's not real. If you really don’t feel that way for him, don’t lead him on.”

This statement seemed to hurt her as she became defensive, “I have told him countless times to consider the offers from all the girls in this school, believe me. I agree with you, he shouldn’t wait for someone who doesn’t feel the same.” She paused, hand tapping the table anxiously, “good thing he doesn’t feel anything beyond platonic feelings for me.”

Kenma knew she wasn’t dumb, not by a long shot. Top of her class, heading off to an amazing college, no doubt. Yet, her words seemed so stupid. “You must be blind.” Came his blunt answer. Anyone could see how Kuroo felt for her.

She scoffed, “there’s simply nothing to see. He doesn’t like me, I don’t like him. Why would he like me?” Y/N was staring at her hands, trying to ignore the discomfort Kenma was causing with his prying. Her tendency to overthink doing her no good as she sighed, “I do hope he finds someone, he deserves it.”

It took Kenma a moment to realize that Y/N was trying to convince herself, not him, and it took him another moment to realize that she was truly wondering why Kuroo would like her. And he knew she was being honest, she had tried to get him to go for other girls, but he never had out of loyalty to her. She had even been in one relationship during their first year, the two were going strong for a while.

Until they weren’t. And Kuroo ended up punching the guy in the face.

When Kenma asked Kuroo if he liked her, he just sighed. They both knew the answer. Kuroo had slept around a lot in their first year, but that had come to a halt more recently. At one point he even tried for a long term relationship with one girl.

She didn’t like Y/N. So that didn’t last.

And now that Kenma had just turned into his neighborhood, bidding you two goodbye as he headed home, just like he did everyday during the walk back from Volleyball practice, the atmosphere felt awkward. Something felt different today as Y/N and Kuroo walked down the path together, his eyes following her figure as he stayed practically glued to her side.

If she was honest, yes, she liked Kuroo. Loved him even. But there were several issues with that, one being that Kuroo is her best friend. She had found someone she could talk to, about any and everything. No filter necessary. No matter how gross, or sad, or weird it was, they could discuss it. She knew she could trust him 100%. Yet, each time he broached the possibility of a relationship she shut him down. She was scared of losing this comfort they had, they would break up eventually. Even if they didn’t things would be different. And in the back of her mind she wondered if he’d leave her. The one constant in her life, gone.

She didn’t like change.

Another issue was that they would graduate at one point. And then head off in what would likely be two very different directions, literally. She had her sights set on a prestigious American college, he just wanted to study Chemistry. Maybe they’d stay in touch, maybe they wouldn’t. Potential time differences caused by living in different countries would make it a struggle and so would conflicting schedules, and stress. And even now, he already had volleyball and school to worry about already.

It would be easier for them both if they just didn’t get together. Which is why, when she realized how comfortable they had been getting, she tried to slow things down. A lot. She started sitting next to Kenma during lunch instead of Kuroo, and began hanging out with the other Volleyball boys far more often. She had been far less physical with him, avoiding most contact with him in general. Taking a rain check each time he asked to hang out, avoiding his calls as often as she could without seeming off. She had been distant, to put it simply.

She missed her best friend, but she knew she couldn’t call him that at this point.

Kuroo had noticed. He always noticed. He noticed the way she got quiet when someone commented on how she was a little too passionate about something, so he asked her about it. He noticed how she’d forget to eat during lunch sometimes, so he would give her a protein bar. He’d notice how when she was nervous, she would bite her nails, or tap her foot at a ridiculous speed. He noticed how when she was sad, she tried to feign joy and boost the morale of those around her, but she still seemed more reserved in a way.

He noticed her. In all her glory, the smell of her shampoo, the scent of her perfume, the glow of her skin in the sunlight, the way her nose crinkled when she laughed her real laugh. How her eyes seemed to shine when she talked about her dreams, the crease in her forehead when she was concentrated. The tears that brimmed her eyes when she talked about certain scenes from her favorite shows and books.

Which is why he got scared when she stopped sharing these things with him, when she stopped giving him hugs, when she stopped calling him at 2AM even though he knew she was awake because of her messed up sleep schedule.

So, as they walked together, he decided this needed to end.

“We need to talk.” He said, eyes on her.

She raised a brow, “what about?” God, she hoped playing dumb would work, but she had tried that with Kenma, and it hadn’t ended all that well. Then again, Kenma did end up dropping the subject, though it took a few tries. 50/50 success rate. What could go wrong?

She watched as Kuroo rolled his eyes, “you know what.” He replied, “also you have been avoiding me.”

She shrugged, “I’ve been busy. I do have things to do, a life. Outside of you.” She held her backpack straps significantly tighter as she spoke, “sorry if you’re feeling neglected.” The words came out meaner than she had expected, and Y/N suddenly found herself feeling guilty as she continued down the street.

“Y/N.” He came to a stop, and she walked a few more steps before stopping as well. Taking a deep breath as she looked upwards, towards the sky. Turns out a lot could go wrong with a 50/50 success rate.

“Kuroo.” Her voice sounded a lot like a warning. “Some things are better left unsaid.”

Thought the finality in her voice hurt, he couldn’t help but scoff, “don’t be ridiculous. I mean, look where that’s gotten us-”

“Kuroo, please.” She turned around to face him, “don’t.”

His eyes locked with hers as he replied, “I’m in love with you.” And now it was out in the open. The thing she had so desperately tried to hide. The feelings she wanted to pretend didn’t exist.

Y/N inhaled sharply, fidgeting with her hands impatiently, she just wanted to get home. She had always hated confrontations, perhaps that was the reason why she said it. It could’ve been one of the reasons she’d been repeating to herself since their second year. Or maybe the words that left her mouth were true.

“Too bad I don’t feel the same.”

No, they weren’t true. She just wished they were.

#kuroo x reader #tetsuro x reader #kuroo tetsuro x reader #kuroo #kuroo tetsuro #kuroo x you #kuroo tetsurou x reader #haikyuu!!#hq #hq kuroo #haikyui!! x reader #y/n did herself dirty #kenma tried #send an ask that says cheesestick if you made it this far #i have not slept omg

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drabblily · 4 years

Text

Bad Confessions

Pairing: Bakugo Katsuki x Reader

Warnings: Cursing, of course. Fluff.

Word Count: 2.1k

Synopsis: Y/N seems to have fallen in love with a certain hotheaded blonde, might as well confess and get rejected to move on with it, right?

A/N: First Post! Hope you enjoy <3

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Falling in love was scary.

There was nothing gentle about it, hence the “falling” part of it. You were either all in or not in at all. You could be pushed, you could take that jump, or you could accidentally take one certain step and fall to your impeding doom.

And it was so, so fucking terrifying to you. When you fall in love there is supposed to be someone waiting for you at the bottom to catch you, that was the fortunate option. The unfortunate side was that when you fall in love, that person could move at the last second to let you splat to the ground.

You guess, that’s what made you so scared of it. That someone would move to let you die. To be manipulated. To be used like that. It scared the hell out of you.

That was probably why you never noticed the signs when you were in it. The constant checking of a text message to see if he texted you, the sweaty hands and speedy heart whenever he walked by, the overthinking about him, trying to grab his attention by looking pretty.

It was torturous and you thought nothing of it, perhaps you were going crazy, though. Because you definitely should not be feeling like this.

So, you visited the school nurse, Recovery Girl, in hopes that she would cure your unknown disease.

“Hello? Recovery Girl?” You knocked on the open door to alert her that you were there before stepping in.

The old woman turned towards you with a smile on her face, “Hello, Y/N, are you hurt?”

You gulped, fiddling with your fingers, what if she weren’t able to help you? What if it was a fatal deadly disease and you couldn’t be cured no matter what??

“Well…actually, not really. I just think I might be feeling sick and wanted to ask you for your advice on how to help me out with it?”

She patted the hospital bed she had, implying for you to take a seat, so you did.

Recovery Girl silently grabbed her thermometer, going across your forehead to see if you had a temperature. You didn’t, normal temperature. She grabbed a stick and told you to open your mouth and say, “Ahhh…” With her gloves, she felt around your throat to see if there was anything that could hint at you being ill.

Unwrapping her gloves and throwing them out, she finally spoke with that constant smile of hers, “Well I did the minimum and it doesn’t look like you are sick. You don’t have a fever or any signs of a sore throat. Are you sure you feel sick? What are your symptoms exactly?”

You furrowed your eyebrows, there was no way you couldn’t be sick. Oh my god, what if you were right. What if you were uncurable!! Leg slightly bouncing in anxiousness, you told her, “W-well, actually, I think my mind is all fuzzy. I’ve been getting urges to check my phone when we are out of class…I sometimes get really feverish around people and it feels like my stomach is twisting when around somebody…do you think a villain could’ve used their quirk on me to make me feel like this?”

Your elder slightly chuckled, as if she knew a little secret, smiling even wider with a slight tint of pink to her cheeks, “Oh dearie,” She patted your bouncing leg to calm you down, “you sound like you’re in love.”

Your eyes widened, blood rushing throughout your entire face, “What! With who?”

“With whoever you want to be around, or whoever you think about most.” She clasped her hands together, nodding her head to convince you further. You couldn’t believe it though. You? In love? Doubtful, you were a future pro-hero! You had no time for love!

The bell rung, hinting you should be at your first period class soon, “Well, dearie, you better get to class now. You know how your teacher acts when you are late.”

You numbly nodded, jumping off the hospital bed and walking out of the nurse’s room. On your way to class, you felt heavier, your mind racing with ideas of who exactly you could be “in love” with. No one came to mind. It was torturous.

Finally, you made it to class, opening the door—luckily Aizawa-Sensei wasn’t here yet—and walking to your seat. Eyes scanning the chatter filled room, you made eye contact with mean crimson eyeballs, your heart picking up pace and your tummy feeling nauseated again.

“Got somethin’ to say, damn extra!?” His rough voice asked you loudly, looking to pick a fight.

Your bottom lip quivered in realization, breaking eye contact and sitting down in your chair. You put your head on the table between your arms, “No no no no no no…him?? Really? That cannot be true, he’s an asshole for crying out loud, what is wrong with you??”

You felt a loud slam on your table, “Hey! I’m fucking talking to you, dumbass!”

Your head jolted up at the suddenness, your big eyes staring up at your crush and classmate, Bakugo in confusion and sudden fear. Your cheeks flushed and you licked your lips, feeling thirsty out of nowhere now, “I…”

You noticed a deep red dust his ears as he opened his mouth, “Nevermind.”

Heart skipping a beat at his unexpected calmness, your eyes trailed his body as he stomped away to his chair with a slouch in his posture.

You felt a tap on your right shoulder, your close friend, Mina leaning over to whisper to you, “Bakugo’s never that nice to anyone, he’s totally got the hots for you!!” She squealed in excitement.

You choked on your air, sputtering out words, “N-No! I doubt that’s it, he probably just didn’t want to deal with Aizawa-sensei, he could’ve walked in at any second after all…”

The pink alien playfully punched your shoulder whilst giggling, “Hah! Yeah right, he doesn’t care if he gets in trouble, he totally has a crush on you, I can tell!”

You opened your mouth to respond when your teacher walked in with a ‘dead inside’ expression plastered onto his face, the entire class going silent so they wouldn’t get in trouble.

----

Ever since you found out your crush on your hotheaded classmate two weeks ago, you’ve done your best to avoid him as well as possible. No eye contact, no walking near each other, no talking—which meant also doing your best to not piss him off so you wouldn’t have an excuse to talk to one another. You did whatever you could in hopes of your stupid crush on him to fade away.

But nothing was working. So, you could only come to one reasonable conclusion.

Confess to him. You knew rejection was coming and you just wanted to get it over with so you could wallow in self pity instead.

Maybe that’s why you were here, standing in front of Bakugo Katsuki’s door, a rather large lump caught in your throat as you raised your hand to knock on the door. Swallowing it down, your fist quivered, hesitating to actually knock.

You couldn’t do this. It was way too nerve wracking and you were too much of a coward to actually do it. Placing your hand back down to your side in defeat, you pressed your head on the wall next to his door with a sigh.

“Why can’t I just tell him…” You murmured to yourself, looking down at your hands, imagining his rough ones holding yours. Which was stupid, considering it would never happen, you told yourself, pushing the silly daydreams away.

“What the fuck did you just say, damn extra?”

The sudden voice made you yelp, jumping away only to trip on your own foot and fall straight onto your ass. You groaned at the impact your palms and butt just got, both in extreme pain. You brought your hands up to your line of sight, inspecting how they were red and felt like it burned.

The man above you clicked his tongue in frustration before offering you his hand, “Dumbass. How did you hurt yourself from that?”

“I...” You started, grabbing his hand hesitantly; staring at your hands connected made blood rush to your face, “You scared me. I didn’t see you there.”

The blond snorted, “Idiot. How are you going to become a hero if you just jump from hearing my voice.” He mocked, narrowing his eyes at you before tugging you up and off the ground.

You flushed, reluctantly pulling your hand away from his to cover your face in embarrassment, “Shut up…”

“What the fuck are you doing in this hall anyways?”

“I just, um, you see…”

“Spit it out already, idiot.”

You peeked through your fingers, making eye contact with him, and taking a deep breath, “I just…wanted to tell you something.”

Bakugo crossed his arms—which you couldn’t help but admire how his muscles tensed and moved—raising one annoyed eyebrow at you to signify to continue.

Okay. You had to do this now or never. If you didn’t do it now, youd be a failure, a disgrace. Maybe rejection was what you needed! Maybe if he rejected you, your feelings for the hothead would dissipate and you could focus on more important things, like being a hero. Not fantasizing what kissing your classmate would feel like in the middle of a test.

‘Okay, just spit it out. You can do this’ You told yourself, putting your hands together and gulping.

“Alright, just listen,” You glanced towards him, seriously, hoping he wouldn’t interrupt you until you got your words out so you wouldn’t feel like a fool midway, “I, well to put it simply, I think…I think I like you, a lot. And its terrifying because ive never felt this way about anyone before. But I know you don’t feel the same way, so…please—”

Before you knew what was happening, Bakugo pushed forward, uncrossing his arms to grab ahold of you.

This was different. A lot different than how you expected.

Soft lips captured yours, passionately. You froze up, your mind going haywire trying to figure out what the fuck is happening right now. You noticed two things, does this mean he liked you back? It had to be right? That thought made you dizzy, there was no way this man liked you back. Bakugo fucking Katsuki, no way.

The man in question pulled away, taking note of your flustered expression, smirking at it waiting for you to speak again.

You reached up to touch your lips, still unbelieving that just happened. The second thing you notice was that his lips, oh god. They were heaven. You expected them to be chapped, rough, but it was far from it. Of course! This man would be perfect like this, after all he did seem like one to take care of himself.

Suddenly snapping up to your senses, your eyes widened, “W-what was that!? I said not to interrupt me!”

Katsuki snickered, “Seriously? I just fucking kissed you and you’re thinking about how I interrupted your stupid confession?”

“N-no! The kiss was nice!” His smirk widened. “No! It wasn’t nice, that’s not what I meant! Well, it was nice, I mean I liked it of course! B-but—”

“You’re stupidly cute when you ramble, you know?”

Your breath hitched before reaching over to smack his arm for teasing you, his strong hand catching your wrist and tugging you into his arms, his free hand coming to grip your waist.

“Stop teasing me!” You whined, struggling against his grip to leave your embarrassment.

“Hell no. Its fun to see your expressions when I do.” Bakugo grinned, his grip tightening for a second, “Your confession was ass though.”

You placed your head on his chest, squeezing your eyes shut. You knew it was bad, but he didn’t have to point it out for crying out loud!

You felt the pressure on your wrist disappear only for it to show up on your chin, “Hey, look at me.” His vermillion eyes surprisingly gentle, his tongue coming out to lick his lips.

You were the one to lean in this time, tilting your chin up to kiss him, after all, you didn’t exactly reciprocate it when he did. However, Bakugo immediately responded, his mouth moving against yours with a passion.

After what seemed like an eternity to you—which in reality was about thirty or so seconds—you pulled away, speechless and breathless.

His forehead leaned against yours, his eyes snapping open to make eye contact with you, “I like you too dummy, don’t forget it.”

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imagine-that-100 · 4 years

Text

Holiday | Part 15 |

Description of Part 1: Alex Turner x Reader (Female) | You’ve been friends with Alex Turner and the other boys from Arctic Monkeys since you were 13. You never for a second thought that Alex would release a song about you though. From late night phone calls and almost constant texting and teasing, you’ve managed to stay close with him over the years. When a pact is established and a holiday is arranged, life seems to be treating you very well. But a month in LA will either make or break you.

Word Count: 9.1K

Warnings: Lots of fluff and a lil smut

A/N: So I think Holiday is nearing an end. I know, criessss. I would say theres about 3 parts left after this one. And I think it will be pretty poetic because the final part will come out on my birthday. Hope you all enjoy this part. Sorry it is not proofread so ignore the mistakes haha. Taglists are always open. Thank you for reading x

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| MASTERLIST IN BIO |

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“Alex, are those camera guys for you?” You ask a little nervously seeing the amount of men with cameras stood outside the entrance to the airport.

You saw Alex look out of the taxis window and you practically saw him deflate.

“Ah shit. No love, they’ll be for us” Alex sighs with a roll of his eyes before looking back towards you.

You can tell that he’s annoyed that they are there. You felt bad for him too, he couldn’t even get on a plane home for Christmas without people wanting to get pictures of it.

“What do we do?” You ask a little anxiously.

This was the first time you’d be properly pestered by cameras whilst doing something normal. You’d seen enough celebrity gossip videos to know how this was going to play out though so at least you knew the basics.

You hoped anyway.

From your understanding, they follow you inside up until the point that security won’t let them in any further.

Alex seemed to sense your nerves though which made him feel a little bad that you had to go through this stuff because of him. After the taxi stopped and he paid, he grabbed your hand and gave it a squeeze as he told you, “Just do everything normal. Don’t worry, I’m not gunna let them near you”

“There’s a lot of them Al” You said glancing back out of the window again.

“Don’t worry” Alex said before placing a kiss on your hand. He sent you a look that asked if you were ready and you nodded with a smile before Alex pulled open the taxi door.

Alex stepped out first and you could already hear them shouting Alex’s name. You followed him outside after thanking the driver and quickly became thankful that you didn’t dress like a complete slob to come home.

You’d actually done your makeup and you were wearing blue ripped jeans with a white Catfish and the Bottlemen top tucked into it and white Vans on to match. The top you had on was their official The Balcony merch that you bought when you saw them on tour the previous year.

The show was so good you just had to get merch to remember it by. The top had a black trim around the neck and the band's name just over your left breast and the album artwork, with the people with their hands down the other's pants, over your right. It also had the number 26 on the back.

You headed round to the boot of the taxi to get your relatively small suitcase off Alex and thanked him for it when he rolled it towards you.

“Do you want me to grab yours so you can get your guitar?” You asked him over the shouts of his name from the herd of men after a picture of him.

He wanted to take one back home and you had no doubt that it was because he’d get bored at his mum and dads around the holidays and he’d want something to do. More than likely because he thought your guitar was shit too because it was on the cheap side.

“Thank you but I’ve got it. Not my first rodeo” Alex grins at you as he puts his guitar case on top of his suitcase whilst he closes the boot.

You smile at him and shake your head slightly, “Just trying to be nice my love”

“And I gratefully appreciate that darling” He grinned back at you whilst he grabbed his guitar case and you both started headed towards the door.

You could hear them shouting the both of you now and the flashes were blinding. You almost wanted to take Alex’s sunglasses off his shirt and put them on. But you didn’t because that would look rude and Alex would probably get backlash from it.

Something that he couldn’t get backlash from though was how he was dressed. Because damn he looked good.

He was wearing his black boots, with his black jeans and a white shirt that was basically half open with his sunglasses dangling from the middle of it. He also wore that black leather biker jacket that you loved and the fact that his hair was jelled back to a crisp make it look like he was still in his AM phase.

Which you were quite liking, but his hair now without all the gel definitely made him look Prince Charming esk so you liked it either way.

You both walked closer to the building and the flashes became more frequent and the shouting got louder. But then you also heard one of them ask how you were, so you ended up just giving a little smile towards that guy.

No matter how hard you could have tried, you couldn’t be rude to someone.

You were surprised when their shouts didn’t follow you inside or at the very least, they quietened down when you both went over to the people behind the desks to check in and give your luggage to. You ended up with just your small black off the shoulder bag to put yours and Alex’s passports in it once you’d gone through everything.

Thankfully there were no complications whilst you checked in to the lovely lady who sorted your luggage out and you were both told to head upstairs to make your way to security. Once you and Alex thanked her you put both of your passports in your bag before heading off.

You both turned towards where you needed to go and when you looked up from your bag you saw that all the men with cameras were waiting for the both of you near the bottom of the escalator. You felt Alex’s hand find your side so he could hold you close to him but also provide you some comfort if you needed it.

“Hey Alex. Hey Y/N” You both received as you walked towards them.

You smiled at them before Alex hurried the both of you onto the escalator. You felt Alex’s relax his grip on you a little bit and his hand just fell to the small of your back whilst he leaned on the side of the moving rails as you both ascended.

And then the questions started.

“Alex have you guys seen the new Star Wars yet?” One guy asks him.

Alex waits a second like he had to think about it before he replied, “No, not yet”

You knew he was just being an arsehole though and making them wait for a reply. You’d spoke about going seeing it a few days ago and Alex was all for talking through it then.

Alex’s hold on you becomes steadier around your waist and you enjoy the comfort it brings you. He’s warm and he makes you feel safe.

Well as safe as you can feel with 10 cameras pointing at you.

“So, you’re both going to see it?” They press on.

“When we get back home” Alex says and then looks back to you and you smile at him.

“Y/N” Your attention then gets grabbed by the nice enough looking guy who’s asking questions, “What band do you prefer, Arctic Monkeys or The Last Shadow Puppets?”

“That’s a mean one” You say with a little laugh.

“Come on pick one for us” The guy grins at you and eggs you on to spill your secrets.

You shake your head with a smile and say, “I’m sorry I like it all. It’s all too good”

“Alex what dates your anniversary with Y/N?” A different guy then asked Alex and you knew straight away he wouldn’t answer that one.

Alex was private and that was very much overstepping his boundaries. It would be overstepping yours too, but you would make damn well sure that you put a post on about it when it came around if Alex would let you.

“Where’d you go on your first date?” The guy changed his mind to.

You didn’t know if he was going to answer that one either, but you’d started to feel awkward, so you just answered. It wasn’t that much of a big deal anyway, you just wouldn’t give specifics.

“Cinema” You told them.

“Oh nice, what did you see?” He then asked you.

Maybe you should have gone for something they couldn’t have been specific about? Or were you just overthinking this?

“I can’t actually remember what it was called but it was really good” You pretended to play dumb.

“What have you got Y/N for Christmas Alex?”

“Maybe you should ask her that one on the way back” Alex said back with a hint of humour in his voice. You looked to him and shared a smile.

 As if he was going to say literally 5 days before the actual day.

“What do you want for Christmas Y/N?” Someone else then asked.

You just smiled and said, “Just the Christmas Dinner will be fine for me”

Thankfully then at that point you both had to step off the escalator and head down towards security. You hear Alex let out a little chuckle at what you just said, and you look around at him and smile.

He smiles back and you can tell that he’s silently asking you if you’re alright. You felt a lot easier than you did before, so you discretely nodded at him and he let his hand drop from your waist.

He knew you’d be fine. He had every faith in you.

And he was shocked by how surprisingly well you were handling their questions.

That didn’t mean they had no more to ask though. And you knew the next ones were going to be hurled at Alex because you knew they weren’t allowed past airport security.

The nice original guy quickly asked, “Alex, can I ask you a silly question about Arctic Monkeys?”

When you heard them ask him that, you couldn’t help but smile.

You could already tell this was going to be priceless. And it truly was.

“Have you ever seen a monkey that’s in a subtropical paradise?” Was the question that was asked.

You couldn’t help the grin that spread on your face with that question. It was hilarious and you really wanted to laugh.

You heard Alex sigh and it was one of those times where you just knew he wanted to laugh, but also look like the cool guy at the same time.

He stayed quiet for a moment and you looked to him a grin on your face as you watched him pinch the bridge of his nose before he looked to the guys that were recording you both.

Alex hand secured itself around your waist again, as he answered “I’ve never actually seen a monkey... anywhere”

At that point you let out a giggle. You couldn’t help it.

It was too funny.

You could not believe he’d just said he’d never seen a monkey.

“What you laughing at? It’s true” Alex asked you a little more quietly than he usually would. A smile plastered on his face.

“That was really funny” You giggled to Alex and he smiled at how amused you were.

You really were adorably bizarre to him. You’d been scared of the cameras not 10 minutes ago but now you were chatting to them like you were old friends.

“Y/N, are you going to make him see a monkey now?” One of them said whilst flashes started going off again.

“Oh yeah” You nod, smiling from the guy to Alex. “Chester Zoo when we get back Al”

Alex rolls his eyes at you and you giggle again.

You then both turn to go through security check when you heard them starting to say goodbye to you as last-minute pictures blinded you again momentarily.

“Thank you guys” The American accent rang out and you smiled brightly at that nice guy as you walked towards the metal detectors.

You and Alex pass through quite quickly despite you idiot boyfriend almost forgetting to take his sunglasses off his shirt when you had to go through metal detectors.

 When you both passed through that and make your way into duty free, you can’t help but stop and have a giggle at him.

“You’re fucking hilarious” You say turning back to him as you browse the shelves of alcohol that lined the duty-free area.

“What the glasses?” Alex asks you with a smile.

You shake your head and giggle as you remind him, “You’ve never seen a monkey anywhere”

“I’m not being funny, I swear, I haven’t” He tells you seriously and you have none of it.

“You’re a liar, every kid went to a zoo in their childhood or with primary school” You chuckle again as you look towards him.

You half wished you went to his and Matt’s primary school just so you knew.

“I was ill with chicken pocks when primary school went. Helders, the little fucker, went without me and came back proceeding to tell me what a fabulous time he had” Alex tells you, abandoning the whisky he was looking at to walk towards you.

He took the sunglasses from off his shirt and held them in his hand so he could pull you in for a hug. You wrapped your arms around his waist whilst his went around your

“I’m not having that you’ve never been to a zoo” You say looking into his eyes.

“I swear I haven’t” Alex says as he grins down at your adorable face.

You shake your head and grin, “Don’t believe you”

“You could text my Mum right now and ask her” Alex tells you with a serious look on his features

“After we decide what alcohol were having for Christmas, I will be doing. Don’t worry” You say before you kiss him quickly and detach yourself from him.

Alex and you end up chuckling at that a lot. You both ended up going for a nice Raspberry gin that Alex didn’t mind having with you on both Christmas Day and Boxing Day. The plan was that you were going to stay at your Mum’s on Christmas morning and have breakfast but end up at Alex’s parents for Christmas Dinner.

You were both so happy with this plan as you actually were planning to stay in Alex’s childhood bedroom on Christmas day night which you couldn’t lie you were pretty excited for. Alex had a loft conversion to himself as his bedroom when he was younger which he was thankful for because he valued his space.

So, you were staying his on Christmas Day night and on Boxing Day your mum and dad where coming over to Alex’s parents so there was a full family dinner going ahead. Since you’d got together apparently your Mum’s bumped into each other at the supermarket and got chatting about having a catch up together.

Something which they had been doing in the months that you’d been in LA. It made you and Alex laugh that one of you would go to call your parents and the odd time you could say hello to both sets.

You were excited for it, but you were also nervous. But you were sure everything would go great.

And at this point it didn’t even matter, as long as you both had a good time you don’t think anything could ruin it.

You cast those thoughts aside for a while though as you were still making your way through duty free. You’d both just sat down after getting yourselves a Starbucks and you fell into conversation again.

“I’m very impressed with you by the way” Alex tells you as he watches you take a sip of your mocha.

“Shouldn’t you always be impressed by me?” You ask him with a little chuckle.

Alex rolled his eye, playfully pocking you, before he said, “Alright then, I’m even more impressed by you”

“Why?” You ask, beyond confused.

“How was that the first time you did that?” Alex asks then proceeds to take a sip of his latte.

“Did what?” You ask with furrowed eyebrows. “I’ve ordered a coffee and bought alcohol before Al” You add jokingly even though you knew he didn’t mean that.

“Shut up smartarse. No, I meant the guys with the cameras, it’s like you’ve been doing that for years” Alex told you.

He knew you’d had photographs taken of you before when you were with him as things had ended up in articles. However, he knew you hadn’t dealt with it like that before.

“I was just answering their questions” You shrug.

You just thought you were being polite, whilst also not really revealing much.

“Yeah, but you were doing it how they tell us too without any prompting” Alex tells you.

“Well first, I didn’t know they told you to answer questions in a way, I just thought that it’d be best to keep it vague…” You explain.

You continue before you take another sip of you hot drink that smells amazing, saying, “I don’t want anything to come back on you so I just wanted to be nice but at the same time not chuck you under a bus”

“You are actually amazing; You didn’t even tell them the name of the film and that's one of the big ones to avoid” Alex tells you softly with a smile.

You couldn’t believe how impressed he was about this. Maybe your overthinking for once actually did pay off.

“Well I was lying anyway because that wasn’t even our first date” You tell him as you observe the way the lady at the till had written your name on your cup.

“Ermmm” Alex hummed and looked at you with raised eyebrows as if he was telling you to reconsider.

Your eyes go wide when you realise, “Oh shit, it was wasn’t it”

“Yeah” Alex nods at you.

“Shit, well, I’ve just been confusing it in my head thinking that our first one was when we went to our restaurant” You scorn yourself and get it correct in your brain.

Alex chuckles a little at that but then shrugs, “To be fair, we were pretty much a couple for the entire holiday anyway. And Roberto did certainly set a certain mood for us”

The mention of that lovely man always brought a smile to your face.

“He did” You grin as you cast your mind back to that great day. “I love that man” You can’t help but say.

“I love you” Alex comes back with.

Your smile matches his when you reply, “I love you too”

~*~*~*~*~*~

In the days that followed, you didn’t make it to Chester Zoo much to your disappointment. You only joked about going with him a few times, but you actually found out that you were correct and that he had been.

He was correct in saying that he didn’t go with school because of chicken pocks. But it turns out that about a month later Matt wouldn’t shut up about the zoo which had made Alex upset so his Mum and Dad ended up taking both him and Matt.

You could only imagine how adorable that trip would have been. You just pictured little Matt running around dragging Alex along to show him what he could remember.

Clearly though, Alex was not impressed when this truth was revealed.

Something that you did end up doing in the days before Christmas though, was look after Zoe. Who you were so bloody excited to see, and you couldn’t wait to give her a massive hug.

It was the day before Christmas Eve when your bother asked you to look after you little niece, which you of course said yes to because you hadn’t seen your little monkey in the longest time.

You’d missed her the most out of anyone and you’d definitely tell her that, but make sure she would promise to tell no one else.

She was adorable with you when she had originally come in to see you. You obviously said hi to her first and completely forgotten about your brother until Zoe seemed to very quickly become besotted with Alex.

Traitor.

When she ran over to him, Alex picked her up and span her around until she was giggling in his arms. Alex had a massive smile on his face he eventually stopped moving around in a circle and he dramatically fell onto the sofa with her.

They both were in hysterics laughing together. They were both so fucking cute.

“I’m so sorry for the short notice” Your brother says, obviously in a hurry.

“No don’t apologise I want to see my niece as much as I can” You say as you give him a quick hug.

“Well thank you so much honestly… Hey Al, good to see you mate” Y/B/N smiles and waves at him.

“You too mate” Alex smiles brightly at him before standing back up with Zoe in his arms.

“Right give your Daddy a kiss because he’s gotta go to work” Alex says to Zoe as he walks towards the front door

He lets your brother takes her off him and she hugs around his neck tightly for a good few seconds as they tell each other they love each other before she gives him a kiss goodbye.

After your brother gives her a final big hug and a kiss on her head before he holds her on his hip whilst she looks back to you and your boyfriend.

Both you and Alex offer to take her from your brother, and you can see her making her decision in her head. Your brother eggs her on and says, “Big decisions now Zo, who are you going for? Who’s more fun”

After a second a grin breaks out onto her face and she leans forwards away from her father into Alex’s arms. You are just stood there now being taken the mick out of.

“Yessss” Alex hums and offers her a high five which she immediately responds to and she hits her tiny hand against his large palm.

You pretend you’re completely shocked and disappointed with her decision and she giggles in Alex’s arms before saying a final goodbye to her Dad. You said goodbye to him and closed the door behind him before you called your little niece out.

“Zoe, you haven’t seen me in three and a half months, and you choose Alex over me?” You exaggeratedly ask with your jaw agape in fake shock.

You watch as her and Alex grin at each other before he whispers something into her ear.

You stand there with your hands on your hips waiting for the inevitable blow to come your way. And it truly does.

“Sorry Uncle Alex is five hundred and five times better than you and he can play the piano better than you too” She barely gets out through her giggles.

Alex looks so proud of her that she’d copied the words he whispered to her. You could already tell that they were going to be completely find spending the full day together.

You let out a big scoff and playfully fake you anger towards her by coming to her as he was sat on Alex’s lap and tickling her until she was wriggling about too much.

After all he was still a shiny new toy to her. And to be fair, you’d known him for more than half your life and you would still choose him every time, so you’d have to get used to her being as fascinated with him as you are.

Zoe stuck to him like glue all day which turned out to be a blessing in disguise. As she sat on his knee watching Tangled you were able to get up and make her dinner in peace knowing she was okay.

And Alex seemed to be in his element. He was keeping her occupied all the time and you knew he loved the attention.

After all she was an adorable little princess.

However, there was one moment in the day that you didn’t think Alex was expecting or prepared for.

It was later in the day when she was showing Alex what tunes you’d taught her on your keyboard, as you got a head start on making her tea, along with something for you and Alex and Y/B/F later.

Your best friend had gone out for the day with her sister for the day so she would be home later on. She said that she was coming home an hour or two early though so she could see Zoe before Christmas.

They both got on really well too which was always fun when you had girly days in your flat. You would always end up painting Zoe’s nails and Y/B/F would always let Zoe paint hers.

Alex was currently teaching her how to play the chopsticks melody which she was slowly but surely getting. However, she was distracting herself by asking Alex every question that came to mind.

He loved that she was chatting to him like this and that she seemed to enjoy is company. Alex hadn’t been close to many kids; He always loved his second cousin's children though and obviously Jamie and Nick’s and he of course he loved your new goddaughter Amelia.

But the fact that Zoe had loved him straight away made Alex feel like he was definitely meant to end up with you.

Zoe had just stopped talking about her last few days in nursery and was telling him about all the dolls that she and her friends played with whilst they were there.

She was happily playing the chopsticks melody that Alex thought that she’d pretty much mastered now when she gets his attention.

“Uncle Alex” She asks as she plays the last note of the melody.

“Yeah?” Alex smiles down at her.

Her little pigtails almost hit her in her face when she turns and looks to him. He moved the hair out of her face that had stuck there for her as she asked him her question.

“Where do babies come from?” She asked him curiously.

Alex was not expecting that today.

Her eyes were full of wonder and she obviously had a head full of unanswered questions. And Alex didn’t know whether it was really his place to tell her anything so he thought it would be best to get your input.

“That’s a really good question” He smiles at her, trying to hide his shock. He then continues with, “Shall we go ask Auntie Y/N?”

Zoe nods her head, “Yeah”

“Come on then” Alex says as he stands himself up and then he picks her up. He places Zoe on his hip and walks over to the kitchen to you.

You’d just put your food in the oven for later on and set a timer on your phone when you see the pair making their way over to you.

You turn around and smile at the both of them.

“You okay cutie?” You ask with a smile.

Alex jokingly replies saying, “I’m great thank you, but Zoe here has a question”

You roll your eyes at him before walking towards them and asking Zoe, “What’s up monkey?”

But then your shocked to your core when you’re asked, “Auntie Y/N, where do babies come from?”

Your eyes go wide and you have to make an effort not to nervously laugh.

You smile at her, asking with wide eyes, “What have you and Uncle Alex been talking about?” before you make eye contact with Alex.

He’s smiling at you and he shakes his head, “Nothing, she just asked me, and I thought I’d get your input”

“Right come on. Story time” You smile as you take her off Alex.

You end up explaining in a way that meant you didn’t really have to explain. You say the whole ‘when two people love each other very much’ they can decide if they want a baby.

And if they do, the baby grows in the Mummy’s tummy and then after 9 months the Mummy goes to the hospital and the doctor helps the baby be born.

And you’re thankful that that seems too keep her satisfied.

Once you’ve finished explaining, you ask her, “Any questions darling?”

You saw her make an exaggerated thinking face as she sat on your knee and smiled at her encouragingly. You see her look from you to Alex who was sat just beside you and you note that he also gives her a soft smile.

“Is there one in your tummy?” She asks your before looking down at your stomach.

You smile at her whilst saying, “Nope. There’s not one in my tummy”

You hoped not anyway.

“But you love Uncle Alex right, so doesn’t that mean you’re having one?” She thinks out loud.

You smiled down at her and shook your head, “I do love him, but we haven’t decided we want one yet”

“Ever?” She asks a little dramatically which makes you giggle.

Alex takes over at this point and fills her in.

“Nooo, definitely at some point. Just maybe when you’re a bit older” Alex tells her with a big grin.

Alex looks to you to make sure you were okay with what he said and he’s happy to see you smiling back at him. God, he loved you a lot.

And your smile was always breath-taking to him.

“So, like maybe when I’m ten?” Zoe asks you, planning out your future for you which makes both you and Alex chuckle.

“Yeah, maybe when you’re ten” You say not being able to hide your grin.

You end up adding as a little joke, “Uncle Alex has got to write me some more music before we have a baby”

Alex laughs at that and nudges your shoulder with his a little.

“Are you going to write her a song Uncle Alex?” Zoe asks him, moving herself onto his lap instead.

Again, what an absolute traitor.

“Yeah” Alex chuckles and stands her up on his lap so she’s just holding his hands for balance. “And I’ll make it extra cheesy song because she likes her cheesy romantic films, doesn’t she?”

You would be lying if you said you hadn’t been educating him on all the cute Disney films and your favourite romcoms. But you knew that he secretly enjoyed them too though, so he was talking shit.

He’d sent you enough cute text messages and cute little notes around your flat and in LA for you to know that he was just as cheesy as you. And you loved everything about it.

Zoe then starts giggling and nodding her head which makes you grin at her. She then throws her arms around Alex’s neck and gives him a hug which makes Alex’s smile huge and he hugs her back.

“I love you” You softly say to him as you smile at the two of them.

“I love you too” He grins back lazily at you and you lean into kiss him quickly before Zoe loosens her grip on him.

She catches the end of seeing you kiss him, so she then goes and kisses his cheek which you find adorable and your heart swells at the sight.

“Stop stealing my Prince Charming” You tell her with a massive smile on your face. “Where’s my kiss?” You ask her, which Alex laughs at looking very smug that he’d got one and not you.

Zoe just giggles and kisses his cheek again, but this time it’s for longer.

You shake your head.

Traitor.

~*~*~*~*~*~

Christmas was amazing.

You had such a good 3 weeks back home with everyone.

The plan to have Christmas morning at your parents and then spend the evening at Alex’s parents went down a treat. It was like you and Alex were having two Christmas’ in one day which was great.

You’d got Alex a few different things.

You got him some more aftershave and you made a joke of buying him cheap shitty hair gel that you knew he would never use as a joke. However, you’d made it very clear that now his hair was getting a bit longer he didn’t need the gel in it as much anymore.

You’d gotten him a lot of bits and bobs that he seemed to love when he opened them. The main presents you got him though were your favourites.

You’d got him a silver keyring that was in the shape of a plectrum which had your anniversary date and ’I’ll always pick you’ engraved into it. You also got him actual plectrums he could use too in the shape and thickness that you knew he liked using.

They were all different ones with stupid little phrases on it that Alex seemed to love when he read through a few.

You’d also got him a phonebook full of the photos you’d taken together over the past few months. You’d basically made him a scrapbook and annotated it by writing in all of your favourite moments together so far.

Something that proved quite difficult to make because back in LA you never left each other alone so you would have to do this when he was over at Miles’ for an evening or out at work in various meetings about his upcoming tour.

Alex loved reading through it, and he was definitely generous with his kisses as a thank you.

Your boyfriend treated you a lot more than you were expecting though.

He’d had a similar idea to get creative for one of your presents. He’d obviously scoured Pinterest much like you had, but his gift was adorable.

He’d decorated a jar that read ‘100 Reasons Why I Love You’ which was completely heart melting.

He’d also gotten you a silver Tiffany’s necklace which you knew was far too expensive, but he insisted that he wanted you to have it. The necklace had an ‘A’ dangling from it and Alex said his thinking behind it was that in the coming year he knew you’d be without him at certain points because of his touring with Miles, so he wanted you to have a nice reminder of him.

The thought behind everything he got you was beautiful, and he truly had spoilt you rotten. You’d spent a couple of hundred on all his presents together, but you knew that everything you’d gotten him was a lot below the price of the necklace he got you.

You told him later on that he was silly for spoiling you, but he said that you’d spoiled him just as much.

And whilst that was amazing, you would have to say that the present that actually stuck in your mind most from the holiday was what your best friend got you.

You always had Christmas Eve as your Christmas Day with her due to you not seeing each other on Christmas Day because you both stayed with your families. So, on Christmas Eve she gave you a present that you don't think you’d ever forget.

She had designed an Arctic Monkeys themed present which you loved to pieces.

It was essentially an Arctic Monkeys guide. The box that contained all the goodies was decorated with pictures of all the album covers which was done to the highest standard.

You were so impressed with her.

Inside the box that she’d created held all different things that Alex had referenced in his songs over the years.

From a bag of pick and mix and strawberry laces referencing Crying Lightning, to miniature bottles of whisky to reference I Want It All. Along with that there was a balaclava, red fairy lights, a little teddy, a silver swimsuit, and some new knee socks which made both you and Alex grin.

He’d also took a liking to the spiked collar too.

There were loads of other things in there too and she’d gone above and beyond for you. You honestly adored all the effort she’d put in and you would certainly love making your way through her box of gifts.

Y/B/F was absolutely buzzing with your excited reaction to everything that she’d put together. She wasn’t even fussed when Alex called her a ‘saddo’. You even scorned him playfully for it because you were just as sad as her as you were getting extremely excited over it.

So, Christmas was definitely a blast for all of you.

And life when you got back to LA was just the same as it was before. It truly was domestic bliss.

You’d been home about a week, and it was mid-January. You’d just returned down the stairs after your shower after work and Alex was still at the studio with Miles.

They had both seemed to get some more inspiration over their time apart from each other and headed back into the studio to create some last-minute tunes. You were definitely excited to hear the album finished as you hadn’t heard anything since that day you went into the studio with them.

When Alex comes in about an hour later, he shouts you into the kitchen as he’s brought your favourite take out in with him. Something which you were extremely excited for because it meant that you didn’t have to cook as it was one of your days after all.

Once you’ve kissed him and asked if he was alright, you then began to prep your meals. That didn’t take long at all and before you knew it you were heading into the lounge.

Alex walked ahead of you and you knew before he even did it that he was going to take your seat. Which he did do, and you scorned him for.

“Why do you always insist on nicking my seat?” You ask and you sit yourself down just beside him and rest your plate on your lap.

You watch as Alex puts his drink on the table just beside the settee before he says, “Darling, this was always my spot. You’re the one that stole it from me, but because I’m a nice person I let you use it”

You’d actually never thought about that before. Jeez, you really did impose yourself on his life.

“Wow so I just came in stole you spot and your heart then?” You chuckled a little.

“Stole my heart years back love, but the spot remains up for grabs. First come first serve” Alex informs you with a little humour seeping into his voice.

You smile at him saying the first bit, but you only choose to pick at the apparent new rules for your seat. You tell him, “I’ve literally been sat in it for the past hour”

A smug look makes its way to his face when he says, “I know it’s nice and cosy. Thank you”

“Eat your food Turner” You roll your eyes before taking your first mouthful of delicious food.

He just chuckles before digging in himself.

After you’d finished eating your tea and you’d discarded the both of your plates, you end up cuddling yourself into him. Something which Alex seemed just as keen for as you.

So, as you watched the rerun of Silence of the Lambs on the TV you both relaxed and enjoyed watching the film whilst chatting about work. You’d informed him that you’d had an alright day and nothing significant happened and he told you that he’d almost finished their new cover whilst he was in the studio today.

You were excited to hear his various of Is This What You Wanted because when you listened to the original version you enjoyed listening to Alex sing along over it. So, him singing it all would just make the song 10 times better.

When silence falls between you when the film comes back on, and Alex kisses your forehead ever so often and as you watch.

You always seem to smile as you do that and Alex notes that you’ve also started absentmindedly running your nails up and down his arm without really knowing. Something that he wasn’t aware was actually quite a lovely sensation which he encouraged you to do when you stopped.

When the adverts returned back to the screen was when Alex asked you something that had just come to mind.

“Do you remember me sending you the poem I Wanna Be Yours when I first found it?” He asks curious to see if you’d remember.

“Oh my god yeah. That was years and years before AM wasn’t it? Like back when we toured back home” You say referring to the UK tour you joined them on.

“Yeah” Alex nods in confirmation.

“I was really hoping you’d of read into that back then” Alex chuckles a little remembering his old hopeless romantic ways.

You sit yourself up a bit so you can look at him when you say, “Believe me, I read into it a lot but I just told myself it was you being your poetic self and sharing what you loved with me”

“My god we were hopeless” Alex says shutting his eyes and leaning his head back.

“We were” You laugh.

You watch as Alex lifts his head back up and smiles at you when he reopened those beautiful brown eyes. You just grin back up at him whilst you savour the cute moment.

“I love you” You almost whisper.

Alex whispers back, “Love you more” before quickly kissing you for a second.

You are once again holding back a smile from him because you would never get tired of hearing that.

“I doubt it but okay” You give him a little grin before snuggling yourself back into him.

~*~*~*~*~*~

It was about a week later when Alex and Matt walked into the house to hear their old music blasting as soon as the door opened.

From Ritz To Rubble was blaring through the air and it was pretty loud. However, Alex wasn’t surprised at all.

Many an evening he would come home and find you listening to music, whether it be his or someone else’s, he always had a little sing along with you every time if he knew the lyrics.

You always scorned him though every time he got his own lyrics wrong like him saying ‘don’t like the sand’ in Bet You Look Good On The Dancefloor and him saying ‘gagging for it’ twice in Teddy Picker. It all ended peacefully though after Alex had tickled you to make you shut up which was always fun for the both of you.

It either ended up in the both of you getting off or cuddling each other. So, either way you were happy.

And Alex knew straight away that the former would be taking place today because of the way you were dressed.

Alex had gone out with Matt really early this morning and he just left you with a goodbye kiss. You knew they were off playing golf, something which you didn’t expect when they first told you about it but if it kept them entertained that was fair enough.

You had had a lazy morning in bed and made no effort to get up at all until around 11am. If you were honest you were really enjoying the big comfy bed all to yourself.

You ended up going for a shower after you got up and you had a nice long and relaxing one. When you got out you immediately dried your hair, so it wasn’t dripping everywhere.

You really couldn’t be arsed getting dressed for the day and you knew Alex was probably due home soon, so you just decided to dress a little teasingly. You walked into your wardrobe and dropped your towel as you were dry now anyway.

You dressed yourself in a red thong that you knew Alex loved to see you in and you also dressed yourself in one of his black shirts. You didn’t bother with anything else as you wanted to set a mood for when he came back.

And you were thankful that Alex picked up on it before you even noticed he’d come home.

The chorus of Alex’s song filled the room when him and Matt reached the kitchen, but upon seeing you and how you were dressed they both stopped in the doorway.

Alex knew immediately that it was his shirt that was covering your body and the bottom of the shirt just reached the top of your thighs. Alex hadn’t even fully noted that you were dressed like that whilst preparing some food and dancing around.

His eyes were just fixed to your bare legs.

Alex’s eyes are eating you up hungrily when Matt turns towards him and says, “Bet your member’s throbbing lookin' at that”

Alex didn’t miss the erotic novel reference he was throwing his way, but it didn’t mean he was impressed by it.

Alex glares at him but quickly looks back to you dancing around now as you sing along to the loud music. Matt laughs at his best mate whilst he’s still facing towards him and Alex is thankful as he didn’t see what he just did.

As you reached into his top cupboard for another bowl the shirt rose up too and Alex saw that you had a red thong on underneath his shirt. And he could tell you had nothing else on other than those two items.

“Matt, imma need you to go home mate” Alex said as friendly as he could whilst his eyes were still tainted on you.

Matt just laughed, “Aha I thought so. I’ll leave you to it. Have fun”

Alex watched you for another 30 seconds until he heard Matt leave the house, before he then walked over. You still hadn’t noticed him yet as you were focused on making yourself the food.

So, to announce his presence without making you jump, Alex started singing along like he normally did before wrapping his arms around your waist. He already knew that you adored being hugged from behind, so he made sure to do that before me made his moves on you.

“Hey baby” Alex purred down your ear. His accent strong and you could already tell what he was in the mood for.

And it wasn’t your cooking.

You play dumb and smile, “Hey”

“I missed you” He tells you as his arms tighten ever so slightly around your waist before he begins to kiss your neck.

“I missed you too. So, I thought I’d make some food to keep me occupied” You tell him, half-heartedly chopping up more ingredient to put in.

Alex nipped down on your neck a few times before he informed you, “I have other ideas about keeping you occupied right now”

Alex of course dragged you away from the food you were trying to make and placed you on top of the kitchen island. And then he proceeded to get you worked up which had you moaning just as loud as the music.

That was something that was definitely a nice bonus about Alex. He always looked after, you in the sense that you always came either once or twice before he did.

Whether it was caused by his fingers or his tongue, or however else he saw fit, you were always very privileged during foreplay. When he was playing nice anyway.

You ended up having sex on the island too. A surface which you two hadn’t yet christened, but you certainly enjoyed it more than cooking.

The music that filled the empty room was also something you’d enjoyed a whole lot.

You had your Monkeys playlist on shuffle with a couple of songs scheduled to come on more frequently than others. And there were no prizes for Alex calling you out on it as he slowed his thrusts for a few seconds when a certain tune started.

The iconic riff of your song filled the room, much like Alex was currently filling you, and Alex called you out on how coincidental the music seemed to be.

“You knew I was coming home, didn’t you?” Alex asked you as the sound system broadcasted him singing the beginning of Knee Socks.

You whined at him barely moving anymore as he’d already gotten you really worked up, but you nodded at him to answer his question.

“You dress like this just for me baby?” He asked you in a low gruff voice as his sinful lips trailed up your neck.

Alex had completely unbuttoned the shirt and it hung half off your shoulders. But he’d kept it on you because you did look sexy wearing his clothes.

As worked up as you were though, you could tell by his voice that he was demanding an answer to what he just said.

You silently pleaded with him as his singing filled the room, but one look into his eyes meant that you knew you had to answer him. Or he wouldn’t carry on.

You murmur, with need dripping from your voice, “Thought you’d like it”

He nipped down on your neck a few times which just made you more desperate for movement. But his torture carried on.

“You pick the music just so I would fuck you to your song?” Alex breathed into your ear as he stopped his thrusts completely.

He lent in to kiss you and you nodded against his lips to answer him just before you kissed him back. Alex could tell that you were silently begging with your kisses too.

He decides to tease you some more by withdrawing his hips from yours, so he no longer filled you completely. The emptiness you felt was then enough to make you desperately whine for him.

“Please” You pleaded needing more, your nails were clawing at his back begging for things to continue.

And that was something which you carried on repeating until Alex gave you what you wanted.

Alex then proceeded to slam his hips back into yours which made you cry out in pleasure as he filled you back up.

Needless to say, having sex with him to your song was the highlight of your entire life.

~*~*~*~*~*~

A month later life was still perfect.

Work was treating you well and Alex and Miles had dropped their first few single from the new album. The response from them was amazing and you loved seeing your twitter blow up over them.

It had been a bit of a hectic month with Alex at various radio interviews and other promotional events, but he seemed to really enjoy everything about it. He was back to acting like a lunatic with his best mate beside him again.

And you knew that there was nothing more that he loved than being up on stage with his mates, so you were excited he got to do it again after his year break from it.

You weren’t worried about him touring at all as you knew that when he eventually went on the road in April he would have loads of fun. And you would have fun scouring the internet for videos of all the various shows.

But until then you would spend as much time together as you could. So that meant lots of time with your friends and also lots of time just the two of you.

You also spent a lot more time in bed together just cuddling each other before you had to face the day ahead. And due to Alex’s having to get up early the last few days to appear on breakfast radio shows, he’s woken up before you today.

That and probably because the light that the windows were letting in probably woke him up too. You were both a little preoccupied last night to close the blinds.

Alex tiredly blinded his eyes until they adjusted to the room and what he saw when he opened his eyes was just stunning.

You were asleep next to him in the most adorable position and he just couldn’t tear his eyes away from you. The way the sunlight hit your features was gorgeous and you looked so peaceful.

Alex felt so privileged to witness you like this. Completely calm and completely vulnerable. You were your most beautiful when you were like this.

The sky that could be seen through the window behind you was gorgeous too. Alex had never seen anything quite like it.

In the distance Alex could see that the sun was just about to rise causing half the sky to turn beautiful shades of yellow, orange, and red. The nights sky also didn’t seem to be ready to leave yet, as the other half of the sky was almost a purple colour that faded into a deep blue, with little red tinted clouds fading the red sky into the purple.

So, Alex’s view truly was beautiful. He was just unsure of what was more captivating.

Alex looked back to you to see that your hair was slightly falling onto your face and Alex had to fight away the urge to brush it away for you. He knew it would eventually annoy you and cause you to stir.

And because he wanted to capture this moment in time forever, he quickly picked up the phone closest to him.

It turned out to be your phone and he knew you wouldn’t mind him using it, so he quickly unlocked it and took a picture of you.

You looked so peaceful in the photo. It was so beautiful.

You were lay asleep looking as elegant as ever with the stunning view behind you. Alex found himself astounded by your beauty and he thanked his lucky stars that you were all his and that he got these moments with you.

After looking at the photo for a moment, Alex then gently moved your hair back behind your ear before kissing your temple and settling himself into bed properly again.

But as he watched the sky fade slowly rise into complete daylight, he couldn’t get the picture out of his head.

He just wanted everyone to see how pretty you were. And it was a gorgeous picture, so he didn’t see any harm in sharing it.

So, Alex then uploaded the picture of you to your Instagram.

Before he tried to fall back to sleep beside you, he typed out a caption before sending it off for the world to appreciate just as much as he did.

Sorry I stole your phone, but my view was beautiful, and I just had to share it. Thank you for making me smile every day and for being my best friend. I love you so much -AT x

~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~

Taglist: @the-girl-before @murderousginger @minigranger @turnertable @bastillewolf @slothgiirl @billskarsgard-is-gorgeous @watashi-no-namae-wo-yonde @fookingsummertime @marvel-avengers01 @shibuikelsi @toolateformcrtooearlytoleaveemo @gretavanbobatea @chocolatecig @iamnotjesha @rachaeljayne15 @edgythought @when-the-darkness-comes @angelicnobody @marveious @liviasaugusta @boysinskirts @musicmania100 @he4rtbre4khotel @innocte @beckauhhh @whoknowswhatimeant @tony-starks-ego @tobarmaidswhodontcount @elektranxtchiios @bettyschwallocksyee @alexsvacuumcleaner @cornerstqne @halfofwhatisayismeaningless @juicebox-baby @yousuck-marina @nrldswita @dot-writes @skullag @arctic-bloe @babyhoneystvles @timchalamxt @writingismybiggestlove

Other parts in Masterlist in bio x

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onceinsomniac · 4 years

Note

Helloooo~~~ Can I request a JiU x fem!reader fluff scenario. Y'know, the classic rivals to lovers cliché (if your okay with it) 👉👈

Author’s note: Sorry for taking so long to answer this. I wasn't sure of how to make it a rivals to lovers story since Jiu is just too nice to have rivals so it ended up being more like one-sided rivals. Sorry. Also, I know Jiu, Sua, Siyeon, Yoohyeon and Dami were Minx before debuting as dreamcatcher with Handong and Gahyeon but as this is made up, let’s just pretend that they debuted as dreamcatcher from the beginning since I wasn’t sure of how to fit Minx in. Anyways, I hope you enjoy it :)

After All This Time

You were 16 years old when you first laid eyes on her. You were nervously pacing back and forth waiting outside the principal’s office for her to call you in. Your math teacher hadn’t told you anything other than the principal wanted to see you but you didn’t need her to explain to know why she had asked for you. After all, you had been waiting anxiously for this day for the last two weeks. Ever since the voting had closed for student body president.

It had taken you a lot of persuasion and, admittedly, some bribing but you were sure you had won. It also helped that the only other person running against you was Nick, the quarterback who nobody really liked, despite his popularity, because of his cockiness. However, no matter how sure you were of your victory, that knowledge didn’t help ease your nerves. After all, it had been your dream to be student body president since you first started your freshman year of high school.

“Hey, are you okay?” a voice asked, breaking you out of your thoughts. You turned to look at a girl who seemed faintly familiar. You vaguely recognized her as the girl who sat a few seats behind you in your history class. You barely heard her voice, to busy admiring her. She was quite taller than you, although almost everyone was considering your short height. She had long, straight hair and you suddenly wondered how it would feel to run your hand through it. She was smiling brightly at you and her smile made your heart start thudding. Her smile, however, started growing smaller as concern replaced it once your silence continued.

“Is something wrong?” she asked. You suddenly came back to your senses and started blushing furiously once you realized you’d been caught staring at the stranger. You resisted the urge to facepalm at your idiocy. “Sorry. I was just thinking. I’m waiting on some news”, you explained. The girls’ smile returned at your answer. “Oh, me too actually”, she said.

You opened your mouth to ask her what exactly was she waiting on when you were interrupted by Ms. Seungwan, the school secretary. “You can go in now”, she told you. Or at least you assumed she was speaking to you but it was the girl who’s name you still didn’t know who answered. “Thank you”, she told her before looking back at you. “Good luck”, she told you, much to your confusion before opening the door to the principal’s office and stepping inside.

You hesitated for a moment more, perplexed at the turn of events, before following after her. “Aah Minji, Y/N, it’s good to see you”, Principal Bae exclaimed. “Thank you, principal Bae”, the girl who’s name you know knew to be Minji responded brightly. “I asked you both to come as the news I’m about to give you affect you both”, she continued. “It seems that against all odds, the votes have come to a head. You both had the exact same number of votes. Your classmate, Nick, wasn’t as lucky. As thus, we have decided that instead of going over the whole process again, you will both be co-student vice body presidents. You will share the responsibilities that comes with the job. Congratulations”

She finished her statement with a flourish of her arms, obviously expecting a grateful response. Grateful, however, was the last thing you were feeling. “How exciting. Thank you so much”, Minji exclaimed, excitedly clapping her hands. The cute display, however, only made you even angrier. You couldn’t believe you hadn’t even been aware of the other girl running for the same position. You managed to thank the principal before walking out the door. “I guess we’ll be seeing a lot more of each other now.” Minji said, once outside.

She smiled the same bright smile she had been wearing earlier but this time, your heart thudded for very different reasons. You saw past the smile to the manipulator that laid beneath it. “Yeah. I guess we will.” You mumbled before leaving the girl behind, feeling annoyed at knowing you would be seeing her again soon.

--------

Your math class had finished while you were in the office and it was now time for lunch so you walked into the cafeteria looking for your friends. You made your way to your usual table where they were sitting. They were discussing something that had happened with some senior but quickly shut up once they saw you sit. “So? Do I have to call you madam president now?” your friend Chun-hei asked. You rolled your eyes at her antics. “Madame co-president actually”, you said.

“It seems that the exact same number of people voted for two of us”, you explained once you saw the visible confusion in both their faces. “Wait, seriously? People actually voted for Nick?” Aera exclaimed. “No actually. Apparently, some other girl had been running and I hadn’t even known about it. God knows how she got so many votes without me even knowing she was running”, you explained, remembering the many long nights you’d spent working on your many signs in order to hang them all around school. Even Nick had hung dozens of posters even thought you were sure he had paid someone else to do them.

“Who is it?” Chun-hei asked. “Some girl named Minji”, you answered. Both your friends stared at you wide-eyed. “What?” you asked. “You aren’t by any chance talking about Kim Minji, are you?” Aera asked. You shrugged your shoulders, not knowing the girls last name. “Tall girl with long, beautiful hair and a constant smile?” Aera said. The description definitely described the Minji you had met. “I guess so”, you responded, not knowing where your friends where going with this.

“Well I guess that explains how she got so many votes”, Chun-hei said. You felt your confusion growing at the bold statement. “What are you talking about?” you asked her. “Don’t you know who she is?” Chun-hei asked. You shook your head, pushing down your bubbling annoyance, hating feeling out of the loop. “Should I know her?” you asked.

“Of course. Everyone knows her. She’s like the most popular girl in school. She’s supposedly super friendly and friends with everyone. That’s how she won. She has so many friends she simply asked them to vote.” Aera explained.

You felt yourself grow even angrier at the other girl, remembering how much work you had put into trying to win the election just so some popular girl could appear out of nowhere and get the same votes as you without even working for it. You were, what some would call, a nerd. You honestly didn’t care much for the social part of high school. You were happy with your two best friends and you were to busy anyways being top of your class to make any new friends.

What you did care about, however, was actually using your position as student vice president to make your school better. And you definitely didn’t appreciate some popular girl sweeping in and treating it as some kind of popularity contest. And now, you were stuck with her for the next two years.

--------

After school had ended, you approached Minji who was standing in front of her locker surrounded by friends. Aera was definitely not joking when she said Minji was popular, you thought to yourself. You did not want to deal with so many people so you decided to wait for them to leave. You leaned against the wall, waiting for the girl to be left alone. It was almost ten minutes later by the time Minji had finally said her goodbyes and started walking towards the entrance of the school. You quickly followed after her. “Hey Minji”, you called out. She immediately stopped in her tracks and turned to face you.

“Oh, hey Y/N. What’s up?” she asked. You couldn’t help but roll your eyes at her, dislike rolling through you, along with something else you couldn’t quite decipher. “Give me your phone”, you stated bluntly. Minji simply raised an eyebrow at you, confusion clear in her eyes. “If that’s your way of asking me out…” she started but you quickly interrupted her. “Of course not. But if we’re going to be working together, we need to be able to contact each other”, you explained. “Oh” she answered. “Here.” She handed you her phone.

You entered your number into her phone, looking down the whole time while you fought of the blush that had formed at her earlier implication. You were sure she was just joking around and didn’t appreciate being made fun of. A feeling you couldn’t quite understand formed in the pit of your stomach but you ignored it, taking it to be annoyance.

You handed her her phone back a few seconds later. “I’ll text you”, she said but you were already walking away and didn’t bother responding.

-----------

As promised, Minji texted you later that night. You both agreed to meet up regularly on Mondays after school in order to go over any issues and all the things you had planned for the school.

It didn’t surprise you at that first meeting that Minji had no real ideas of her own and she simply hovered over you as you explained yours. Your annoyance at her grew every week after each meeting as she continued spending the whole meetings staring at you. It was made quite clear that your earlier assumption about her just wanting the job to prove her popularity was right.

You would be trying to come up with ideas of how to convince the principal to listen to your ideas when Minji would just start talking with you about something that had nothing to do with what you were supposed to be doing in the first place. She would start asking you about yourself and what you liked doing. It annoyed you to no end that you were stuck with someone who clearly didn’t want to be there and so you soon took to simply ignoring her.

She would pout at you but would then continue talking with you even when you refused to answer her. It looked like nothing you did brought down her mood. The feeling you couldn’t quite recognize continued to grow and as someone who was used to being very in control of her life, you hated the way her presence made you lose control of something as simple as your emotions. That just ended up in your annoyance at her growing and when the school year finally ended, you were relieved at not having to see her during the summer break.

------------

For some unexplainable reason, Minji continued calling you during the break, asking you to hang out. You continuously ignored her calls and soon they turned to messages. They would range from asking you to hang out to venting about something to simply wishing you a good day. You never answered any of them. You were confused about why Minji continued to bother you even when you weren’t being forced to see each other, sure that it was just her way of annoying you as payback for ignoring her.

You ignored how bothered you felt when the messages and calls stopped coming about half-way through the break. Once you were finally back at school, ready to start your senior year you realized Minji was nowhere to be found.

As much as you didn’t want to see her you reasoned that you had to since she was still your co-president. After looking for her the whole day, you finally made your way to the principal’s office to ask if she had any idea of Minji’s whereabouts. You were shocked when she told you that Minji had left the school. Apparently, she had moved to Seoul in order to become a trainee. You hadn’t even known Minji wanted to be an idol and your stomach churned uncomfortably when you realized she’d probably told during one of her long rants and you had simply ignored her.

You told yourself you were relieved at finally being able to do the job the way you wanted. Relieved at no longer having the annoying girl hovering over your shoulder, watching everything you did and trying to distract you from the job. You swore you were relieved.

You couldn’t understand, then, why you kept turning to ask Minji her opinion whenever you had an idea only to be disappointed when you remembered you were alone. It didn’t explain the loneliness that started growing inside you or the way you would look at her contact in your phone, your finger hovering over the dial option.

Your senior year passed quite quickly, the feeling that you were missing something never leaving you. Before you knew it, you had left Daejeon and had moved to Seoul, ready to start your first year at the University of Seoul.

You were majoring in Political Science and where quite enjoying it. You had quickly made new friends, something which had never been easy for you. It helped that you had met in one of your classes and you all had shared interests. You still kept in contact with Chun-hei and Aera, both who had stayed in Daejeon.

It was at the beginning of your second year when the feelings you had kept hidden for so long came rushing back in. You were studying for an upcoming exam in your dorm room when your phone pinged, signifying a new message. You opened your phone to see that Chun-hei had sent you a link, along with about a dozen heart emojis. You let out a small laugh at your friends’ usual dramatics before clicking on the link

The last thing you were expecting to see was the face you hadn’t seen in more than two years but was still present in your mind. Minji looked much the same, although her face showed a new maturity. She was dressed in dark robes along with six other girls and the title declared them to be Dreamcatcher, a new group who had just debuted. You felt the same annoyance you had felt so many times during your Junior year of high school although for some reason the feeling wasn’t unwelcomed. You actually found yourself to have missed it.

Minji’s usual smile was nowhere to be found on the poster, a serious expression on her face instead. Considering it was the same matching expression on all the girls, you assumed this had something to do with their concept. You spent that whole night watching their pre-debut videos on youtube and all the interviews they had done since their debut. You found yourself constantly listening to Chase Me during the next few weeks but you justified it to yourself by saying you were just listening to it because it was catchy. Not because you had missed her voice or anything like that.

Soon, you had become a dedicated Insomnia, watching all their vlives and staying up late for each and every one of their comebacks. You brought a ticket for their next concert and spent the whole concert looking at the person who had once been your school rival, wondering how come the empty feeling that had been a constant in your life since she’d left felt like it was disappearing.

It wasn’t long before you found yourself buying another ticket for their next comeback and soon, it became a custom, to go to their first concert after each comeback. You wanted to go to more of their concerts but you were to busy with school. Without even noticing it, you had started buying each ticket closer and closer to the stage.

After being a devoted Insomnia for so long and watching the way she interacted with her members, you started thinking back on your time together. Her kindness and constant smiles seemed so genuine and you felt bad thinking back on how coldly you had treated her during your time together, assuming her to be just another typical popular girl.

It was right after they had released their second EP, Escape the Era, that everything changed. As always, you had brought a ticket to their first concert in Seoul, not thinking much about finding yourself in the second row. It wasn’t until Dami’s part in You and I that you felt a pair of eyes staring into you. You turned towards where you felt the gaze coming from only to find yourself staring right into Minji’s eyes. You could see the recognition flowing through her eyes and quickly looked away, feeling embarrassed at being caught by her. You spent the rest of the concert avoiding her gaze which you could feel burning into you.

The moment the concert ended, you pushed your way outside the venue, in a hurry to escape from the uncomfortable situation. You weren’t sure why but you felt extremely embarrassed at her knowing you had brought a ticket for her concert. You quickly made your way back to your dorm, feeling ready to go to bed and sleep the embarrassment away. That was definitely the last time you attended their concert, you decided sadly.

You opened spotify on your phone and clicked shuffle on your dreamcatcher playlist, knowing their music always made you feel better. While the music sounded around the room, you changed into your pajamas and got your things ready for class the next day. You were just about to turn of the lights when a knock on your door made you stop.

You looked at the alarm clock on your nightstand, noting that it was almost 1am and wondering who would be knocking on your door at such a late hour. You hesitated briefly before the knocking started once more. “I can hear you in there”, a voice which you immediately recognized as Minji’s called. “I can also hear the music”, she said. You then remembered you had your dreamcatcher playlist playing and hurried to turn it off. You wondered how the other girl had known where to find you. Then again, Minji had always been quite resourceful.

You could feel the other girl waiting on the other side of the door and you briefly weighted the pros and cons of jumping out your window in order to avoid the awkwardness that was about to happen, assuming Minji was her for an explanation on why you were in her concert in the first place. Unfortunately for you, your room was located on the top floor and as much as you wanted to avoid the situation you also didn’t fancy dying.

“You’re going to have to leave eventually and I’m happy to wait”, Minji called, making you sight in defeat before making your way to the door and opening it, coming face to face with the taller girl for the first time in years. Minji was wearing pants and an oversized hoodie, having changed after the concert. Despite her lazy wardrobe, the sigh of her still made you catch your breath. She was smiling at you brightly as thought her showing up at your dorm at one in the morning was an everyday occurrence.

Without a word, she pushed past you and made her way into your room. You wordlessly closed the door before turning to face her. “Um. Hi.” You said, breaking the tense silence. By the bright smile on her face, however, you guessed that you were the only one feeling the tension. She ignored you, walking over to your desk and looking through your collection of all the tickets you had brought, proof of all the concerts you had gone too. You had completely forgotten about them.

“So this wasn’t the first time”, she stated. “How come you never said hi?” she asked. You stared at her weirdly, having thought she would have been creeped out and thinking you were some kind of obsessed stalker or something. Instead, she looked quite pleased at your collection. “I don’t know. I mean, I assumed you wouldn’t even remember me”, you answered. Your answer was only the half truth thought. You’d also hadn’t wanted to talk to her because you found your feelings for her so confusing. Half the time, you weren’t sure whether you wanted to annoy her or kiss her.

Minji let out a small laugh at your answer. “Not remember you? That would be quite hard considering not a day has gone by when you haven’t crossed my mind”, she admitted. For a second you felt envy at how easy Minji could say what she was feeling, so unlike you who always tried to hide your feelings. But then her words registered and you surprise course through you. You were still trying to think on what to answer when Minji suddenly took a few quick steps towards you, quickly closing the space between you too. You stood there motionless as she invaded your personal space, so close to you that you could feel her warm breath on your face.

“Why now? Why after all this time?” she asked, her voice no more than a whisper. The smile was long gone as a serious expression crossed her face. “What are you talking about?” you asked her, trying not to stumble over your words as your thoughts were a jumble at her close proximity. You found yourself resisting the urge to look at her lips. “Why bother coming to so many of our concerts. Why show up in my life again. Just when I was finally starting to move on. Why?”

Her voice got louder with each sentence. She stepped back, giving you space once again, as she ran her hands through her hair in frustration. She turned to look at you once again. “Why”, she repeated, her voice sounding unusually stern. This was the first time you had seen the usually happy girl so frustrated. Even when you had spent so long giving her the cold shoulder during your junior year of high school, her never-ending smiles and positivity had never wavered.

“I wasn’t trying to bother you. You weren’t supposed to see me”, you explained, trying to calm the slightly older girl down. Your words, however, only served to anger her even more. “Is that supposed to make it better?” she spat out.

You were extremely confused at what was happening. “Minji, I’m sorry if it seemed weird that I go to your concerts. I won’t do it anymore if it bothers you so much”, you told her, trying to regain control of the situation. Minji turned to glare at you, anger visible on her face. “What bothers me is why would you even come when you hate me”, she said.

You sputtered a few seconds, trying to find a reply to the sudden accusation. “I don’t hate you. I’ve never hated you.” You said. Minji let out a dark chuckle. “Yeah right. Then how do you explain you ignoring me and clearly being annoyed by me for a whole year?” she replied. You felt guilt coil in your stomach at the truth in her words. You could understand why the older girl had thought you hated her but you didn’t. You never did. You were just to stuck on your misconceptions of her to see who she really was.

“I’m sorry. The truth is I was just annoyed at you for the way you seemed to always get what you wanted without even working for it.” You admitted. Minji looked confused at your words so you continued explaining. “I worked my ass off for that position and you just came in and got it without any effort. And don’t say it was because you cared about our school and wanted to change things. Most of the times you just stood there and did nothing. I was angry that it was just some popularity contest to you.”

You took a few seconds to catch your breath after your rant. You hadn’t expected to let all that out but you were just so confused by Minji. You hated the way you never knew what to say to her. Understanding seemed to dawn on Minji and you were surprised by the familiar smile that once again made its way to her face. “Seriously Y/N? I knew you could be oblivious but this is ridiculous”, she said.

You felt offended at being called ridiculous and where just about to say so when Minji surprised you by one again stepping into your personal space. This time, however, you took a step backwards only for her to follow after you. You were confused by the look in her eyes which you’d never seen before. You continued backing away until you hit the wall. She stood inches away from you, an almost predatory smile making its way into her face. She leaned both hands against the wall, caging you in.

“You’re right. I didn’t run for student body president because I wanted to change things. I ran because I wanted to get to know you”, she confessed. She didn’t give you time to respond as a second later a pair of lips met your own in a hungry kiss. Your lips started moving along with hers immediately, almost as if you had done this before. The taste of apples lingered on her lips and the smell of vanilla immediately filled your senses. You immediately forgot all your previous worries, too consumed by trying to get closer. The weird feeling she’d always caused you finally made sense.

She pulled away first, a small smile on her face as she looked down at you. “Do you get it now?” she asked and you finally did. You felt stupid for not noticing her feelings years before. Then again, you hadn’t even noticed yours. What surprised you even more than the fact that she had had feelings for you was that those feelings seemed to have remained. “Even after all this time?” you asked her. Minji didn’t respond. Instead, she leaned down and kissed you again. And for some reason, you felt as thought you were finally complete.

#request #Dreamcatcher #dreamcatcher scenarios #jiu x reader #kpop scenarios

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nicostolemybones · 4 years

Text

A prom date, you and I?

A collaboration for the @solangeloweek Spring Ball between me and my partner, @sanderssideburns so this is short but sweet and super super full of love. He writes as Will and I write as Nico for this!

Will stood trembling with excitement. His heart reminding him with every loud thump that it was the day he has been impatiently waiting for. He felt jittery and anxious as he straightened his tie, face all flushed and smile stretched from one ear to the other.

Prom day.

The one day of the school year where everyone came together collectively to enjoy a night with their friends and dates. The one day Will refused to be fearful of homophobic remarks hushed in not so friendly tones because today was the day Will got to scream from the rooftops that his date was Nico Di Angelo.

Nico was the only truth in Will's life, the only constant. The only person that would make him feel better without fail. No matter what, the one thing Will knew for sure, is that Nico was home. Will loved him. Will never wanted to be without a home again.

His blue eyes peered back at him from the window hanging over his sink, showing him just how nervous he really was. Will didn't want to be nervous but he couldn't help. Too many times in his life good things turned bad but... No, he willed the thoughts away and focused on Nico. Nico was excited for today and Will was excited to spend today with Nico. He would never let a few anxious thoughts keep him from having the best date with the love of his life.

With that Will smiles, leaning in closer to the mirror, and starts dotting the concealer on any of his blemishes. He wants to look perfect, he wants to feel confident, so he wouldn't have any worries while he held Nico close and whispered how much he loves him into his ear while they dance.

He can't wait to dance with Nico, arms holding his boyfriends hips as they sway around the dance floor. The rest of the world shrinking away as they float around on cloud nine. As they drift in each other's arms safely.

Will looks at his pink suit and smiles, noticing how it brings out his natural blush, and it makes him blush darker. He knows Nico is going to love how he looks, he knows that Nico is going to look amazing too. Nico always looks amazing. He flushes a bright red just imagining Nico in his black suit, his undershirt matching Will's suit. Will looks at his own undershirt, black, matching Nico. He loves that.

He loves that they feel safe together, comfortable with matching their prom outfits. It's pretty cheesy but the thought alone makes Will's nerves settle. Nico is choosing to be seen with him, he wants to be seen with him and isn't trying to hide it. He knows Nico will protect him and he knows he would do anything to protect Nico.

He doesn't need to worry, they'll be safe.

Nico always protects him, sometimes without even realizing. All Nico has to do is smile at times and Will's anxiety will ease. A single smile is all it takes sometimes for Will to feel safe. Will loves feeling safe because of Nico. Will loves feeling cared about because of Nico. Will honestly loves anything because of Nico.

Will giggles to himself and whispers, "I'm so whipped."

He continues with his makeup, adding a bit of glitter to his eyelids to make them pop, not enough to be obvious but enough for Nico to see when they're face to face. He wants his eyes to pop because he knows Nico loves his eyes.

He loves Nico's eyes too. How soft and familiar they are. Their warmth makes Will feel giddy inside. Everytime Nico looks at him with those gentle brown eyes, Will feels a little more in love.

Will loves everything about Nico. He loves his kindness, even when Nico doesn't always openly show it. Will loves his humor, his late night thoughts, and even his crude inappropriate jokes. Will laughs thinking about them. Will especially loves how genuine Nico is. How Nico is true with his feelings, he doesn't always show or talk about them, but when he does, Nico is truthful. Will loves that.

Will loves knowing he can trust Nico no matter what. He knows Nico would never hurt him, or lie to him about something important, or do something to break his trust. Will loves that stability. Will loves having something, someone, to trust with no doubt in the back of his mind.

Will trusts Nico, he loves him, and he wants tonight to be the most perfect night. Because Nico deserves that. Will likes to think he deserves it too.

After all the shit and pain they have gone through, a night of love and joy is just what the doctor ordered. Will should know, he's the one who wrote the doctor note after all.

He glances at his phone, beaming at his lockscreen that's a picture of them together smiling, and checks the time. It's still way too early to be dressed and almost ready to leave. It makes him flustered that he's so nervous.

The thing is, he can't calm down, because he's so fucking excited. He's excited to hold Nico’s hand, see him all dressed up, and spend the night dancing with him and loving him freely and without any fear.

Tonight is about having fun and Will refuses to let anything ruin that for them.

He runs a hand through his hair anxiously, thoughts going wild. He wonders how Nico is doing his hair, should he text him and ask? Maybe they should do matching hairstyles… No that's way too much. But he hopes Nico is happy with whatever hairstyle he chooses. Will looks at his hair, he should definitely keep it soft and fluffy, no hair products if he can. He wants Nico to be able to run his fingers through his hair… Will loves when he does that.

Will closes his eyes imagining it. He loves how warm Nico’s hands are. How soft they are when tangled in his wavy hair or cupping his cheek. Will feels his chest tighten in happiness.

He hopes they have a lot of moments like that tonight. A lot of embraces, kisses, giggles, gentle looks, blushes, and happiness. He hopes with everything inside him that tonight is everything he wants it to be, for both of them.

A loud snap makes Will jump, but he laughs loudly when he realizes it was just the comb falling off the sink. He picks it up and starts brushing his hair, giggling a little at how it fluffs out in funny angles.

Nico would tease him about it before running his fingers through it and kissing him, saying how much he loves Will. It almost makes Will tempted to keep it how it is but he decides against it quickly because he would rather Nico tease him in private. He would also love for Nico to see him and immediately know how much effort Will put in to make himself look good. He wants Nico to know he cares enough to put in that extra effort.

Will starts actually styling his hair now, brushing it back into a neat simple look. He isn't very good at hair anyway, so he's pretty happy with how it ends up. Even if it isn't very impressive.

He takes a deep breath and looks at himself fully, taking a step back. His pink suit is still crisp and fresh, the black shirt underneath ironed straighter than Will’s sexuality, and his face looks soft. He smiles, dimples popping up among the array of freckles. He can't help it, Will shoots himself finger guns, “lookin good Solace.” He says to himself with a semi confident chuckle. He feels good and he's more excited than ever for Nico to see him.

In a rush, Will leaves his room, triple checking anxiously to make sure he has everything he needs. Wallet, phone, stim toy… He pats himself down and runs out the door. He immediately runs back in remembering an extremely crucial thing he forgot, his shoes.

After slipping them on he's off again, practically running to where their prom is being held and he holds his breath upon entering.

Because there's Nico.

Nico smiles, eyes beautiful and staring at Will. Will can feel his heart speed up, but not with anxiety this time… but with love and warmth and all things good.

Will can't believe he was so nervous before, because now he's here, he wouldn't want to be anywhere else. Nico seems happy and content. Will plans on doing everything he can to keep that happy look on his face.

Will loves him, he knows that, it's his single truth. But right now he can feel himself falling deeper and deeper in love the longer they stare at each other. Nico’s eyes warm, giving Will the reassurance he needs for the last bit of his anxiety to slowly melt off.

They're here, standing in the middle of their prom, and safe together. Will smiles and takes Nico in, his eyes, hairs adjourned with flowers, and suit. Will smiles at his suit. It's black and makes the pink undershirt stand out beautifully. Hell, everything is standing out beautifully because Nico is wearing it. Nico looks beautiful, more than beautiful. He looks gorgeous and handsome and… and cute?

Will can't think of the perfect word to describe him other than beautiful. Absolutely beautiful and he grows more beautiful somehow the longer he's smiling.

Nico is smiling and it makes Will glow gently, eager to be with him and hold his hand and dance the night away.

Because they can.

Because this is their night and their turn for that happily ever after they deserve.

He loved Will. Of that, he was sure. Out of all the things in all of the world, his love for Will was his only objective truth.

It was everything about him, from the way he smiled to the way he laughed. When Will would smile, the corner of his mouth would quirk up and his eyes would light up before his whole face would relax into a wide smile, one where the freckles on the bridge of his nose would crinkle, one where his cheeks would dimple either side in a way that had Nico wanting to grab his face and kiss them both before worshipping every last freckle on his face. Each freckle was like a star in the night's sky, constellations and nebulae, and Nico was a sailor lost at sea, guided home into Will's safe arms by the ever-constant freckles on his face. Love alters not. Nico couldn't help but think of sonnet 116 whenever he looked at Will. He was so sure of his love for Will. Will's laugh. Will's laugh was music, the best kind of music, full and loud. He wasn't a songbird when he laughed, rather he snorted and wheezed and giggled in a way that made him tear up, his whole body shook, the blood flooded his cheeks until they were a ruddy wine pink to the tips of his ears, until the blotchy blush spread down his neck and reached the constellations on his back and chest.

Nico had spent so long in the bathroom already, trying to figure out how to wear his hair- he'd scrubbed the gel out twice and given up, and he was about to grab the straighteners when his sister Hazel leapt up from her seat on his bed, reminding him that his curls were beautiful, putting two simple braids either side and tying them at the back, weaving in daisies. She still had her nightie and bonnet on- after all, it was five am and way too early for Nico to be getting ready and he was probably going to sweat too much and have to shower again and ruin his hair. Nico would do his best to return the favour, although he'd probably call somebody in to spend the time to braid her hair correctly.

And his suit, his suit was black, cut crisp and ironed out straight, tailored exactly to his measurements. It complimented his rich olive skin, and the baby pink shirt, pleated at the front, worked well. Nico wasn't one to wear pink, but it was going to compliment Will's suit, and if he was honest, it suited him, and he liked the colour connotations for himself. He'd decided on the bow tie, black, of course, with gold trimmings like the gold of Will's glow. But he quickly took it off- he wanted to match Will, wanted to be cheesy, so he put on his black tie and undid it and repeated the process for at least ten minutes before deciding it looked good.

He wore a small amount of eyeliner, just to bring out the deep glass brown of his eyes, and perhaps distract from the still reddened acne scars on his cheeks. He didn't mind them, of course, they were natural- he just loved his dark brown eyes, and wanted them to stand out the most today. He knew Will liked his eyes, loved the way Will would look him in the eyes, his blue ones scanning between Nico's eyes in search of Nico's feelings. And Nico would always melt under the concern and sincerity in them, would melt in the way Will's salt damaged curls felt beneath his fingers, dry, but so soft, like cat fur, but longer, and a sunrise blond.

Nico was nervous of everything about today, from the fact he was ready so early, to the fact he was arriving alone, and what if Will was late or what if Will was sick and couldn't make it-

He must have been pale with anxiety, because Hazel had made him sit down. He took a moment to look at the shake of his hands, attempting to will the shake away. His skin had finally lost the unhealthy ghostly tone- the way that his rich skin would seem to have a translucent mottled appearance, almost greyed with the sallow pallor that had taken over. He'd looked so ill, like a ghost, not white, but intangible, or like a corpse, like there was no blood beneath his skin, his tan faded enough that his olive skin looked dull. Not white, far from white- after all, his olive complexion was there to stay- but it looked ashen. His skin was a warm tan, the olive undertones seeming to almost glow with vitality now- like it once had when he was a child.

He was so happy.

He knew that the moment he arrived, he'd be unable to breathe. He knew- he knew he'd get that sudden surge of life inside the pit of his stomach, fluttering out of his chest like caged songbirds- he knew he'd be unable to help the goofy smile that crossed his expression as he found himself looking at Will. Because Will was stunning, Will was pretty, Will was handsome, and Will was beautiful. There wasn't many men that Nico considered beautiful, but Will? Will was beautiful. He was beautiful when he laughed so hard he hiccupped light butterflies and he was beautiful when he cried over puppies. And he was beautiful when his glow shifted into warm ambers and sunrise yellows, and he was tragically beautiful when they shifted into sunset oranges and dark ambers. Will was beautiful, stunning, acne scars to match Nico's own.

Nico wanted Will to know that he was beautiful, that his soft features were kind and reassuring, that his flesh was beautiful over every pound of flesh beneath, over every pale bone and every bloody muscle, over every thin tendon and every working organ. Nico didn't always have faith in the gods, but he believed in them with his whole being and vitality when he saw Will's baby blue eyes, the way that Will was so beautiful, so angelic, so goddamn handsome, that there was no way he hadn't been delicately crafted by the gods themselves.

Will was so kind, so loving, so tender, in the way he'd hesitate before every kiss and the way he'd cup Nico's jaw with the softest touch, to silently wait for Nico's consent before kissing him so tenderly, so lovingly, that Nico could feel every ounce of emotion behind it. Nico knew he was loved, in the way Will closed his eyes and sighed, in the way Will held Nico close long after the kiss had ended.

Will was so genuinely kind, so loving, so considerate and so talented. Nico had never been more sure of anything more than this as he slipped the gold ring inside of his jacket's inside pocket.

He looked in the mirror one last time, before changing back to the bow tie. Maybe he wouldn't match Will today, and maybe that wouldn't matter- because he knew- he knew, looking at his reflection, that the small accent of gold would be a comfort whilst he travelled, like Will was right there, always, close to his heart.

He'd never been more nervous, and he was sure he'd be more nervous in the future, but right now, he knew that his nerves were a precursor to something good, that today, he would unlock a future he once would have only dreamed of. He found himself not particularly caring what anybody would have to say. Will was his king tonight.

And he waited hours, hours until finally- finally, he was able to sit inside the slick black limo he'd hired, finally able to anxiously count down every second until he arrived. He was so wrapped up in his anxiety that he hadn't the chance to think- but as soon as he stepped out, as soon as he calmed his breath and looked up, everything stopped.

Will was ethereal. He was breathtaking, stunningly beautiful, stood there nervously in his baby pink suit and his black shirt. And their eyes locked. Nico felt as though his feet moved on their own, unable to think of anything, anything other than Will, beautiful, kind, loving Will- and he knew more than anything else in this world that he was going to love this boy with his whole soul, knew that he was going to hold this boy and never let go, knew that he was going to marry this boy.

Will was the sun, the sunrise, and the sunset. Will was the warmth across the shadows. Will was the embracing light and comforting heat of the soft golden glow of every morning and every evening, he was the fire that kickstarted Nico's heart, and he was the ray of light that bathed every worshipper in his luxurious golden glow- the giver of life. Being with Will was a religious experience.

"Hey," he punched out in a stuttered breath, reaching his hand out with a genuine, heartfelt smile, "care to dance, sunshine?"

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dearwriterciera · 4 years

Text

Not In the Same Way (Spencer Reid x Reader )

a/n: ok so since I stan 5SOS and Spencer I figured I would write a short little story based on their new song Not in the Same Way. This is part of the little writing challenge I put on myself. I’ll link the list so you can see the other parts as well!

Pairing: y/n x Spencer Reid

Warnings: fighting, breakup, depression, alcoholism,

Summary: Spencer and Y/N have been getting into arguments a lot recently, and they’ve both been avoiding the inevitable, until Spencer sees a side to Y/N that he had only heard about.

Words: 1855

a/n: I’ve been really sad recently so I figured I would get my feelings out the only way I know. I’m not going to lie, this one made me so sad to write. I almost cried but i’m also super emotional right now anyways lol i hope you guys enjoy it!

~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~

Things between you and Spencer had been...rough these past few weeks to say at the least. Every little thing that happens turns into an argument between you two and it was starting to cause you a lot of stress. Just yesterday you guys literally had a fight over dinner, which resulted in you guys eating in two separate rooms, two separate meals, when you guys usually eat together and talk about your days.

You had to admit all this fighting and things changing is making your usually pretty tame depression go wild. Whenever you got majorly depressed you would drink, a side of you Spencer had never seen. You wanted to keep it that way but sometimes things don’t go the way you want them to.

You were home alone, Spencer was gone on a case so you knew that you’d have days to figure out how to talk about you guy’s last arguement, but, for now it was time for another session of binge drinking. You got up on the counter, pulling the bottle of vodka off the top shelf and set it down beside you. You slid off the counter carefully before grabbing a shot glass and a can of Dr. Pepper as a chaser. Looking down at the items in front of you made you let out a loud sigh.

“Back to square one.” You mumbled to yourself as you poured vodka into the glass, setting the vodka back down and opening the Dr. Pepper. After very little debating, you threw the shot of vodka back, the burn hitting your throat almost instantly as you swallow the clear liquid, before you take a drink of Dr. Pepper. Setting both the shot glass and the can down, you place both hands on the counter and lean over it a bit. This had become such a familiar thing to you, you didn’t even question it anymore. You just went with it.

After 5 more shots of the same repeated cycle, you set them down again, but as you stared at the counter all you could think about was the last fight you guys had, right before Spencer left for work.

“Hey, Spence, have you seen my phone?” You asked, walking into the living room of you guy’s shared apartment. Walking in you immedately saw he was on your phone, going through it. You didn’t have anything to hide of course, you loved Spencer, but you were hurt, you weren’t going to lie. You walked over to the couch he was sitting on and raised an eyebrow, crossing your arms, “Can I help you find something?”

Spencer looked up from your phone and instantly became flustered, dropping it onto the floor as he began speaking, “Wait, y/n, I’m sorry!” He practically pleaded. You leaned down and picked up your phone, sliding it into your pocket,

“Did you find anything you were looking for?” You asked, your voice was not very forgiving, he could tell you were mad..no..furious. You’ve never done anything to make Spencer think he couldn’t trust you, and you would never invade his privacy like that so why he felt the need to invade yours was..beyond words.

“It’s not what it looks like, babe, I swear.” He defended himself, standing up from the couch and turning towards you.

“Enlighten me then because from where I’m standing, it looks a whole lot like you going through my phone to find something, ANYTHING, that would make you want to leave me.” You said, your voice was filled with anger, you were on the verge of shaking if you were being honest. Spencer’s face was filled with guilt, confusion, and a hint of anger himself. This was common recently so it didn’t phase him.

“Y/n, that’s literally crazy.. I wasn’t looking for a reason to leave you.” He started his argument, “I was just..curious.”

“OH! Oh, my bad, you were just curious, my mistake.” You shot back, sarcastically, Spencer frowned,

“You’re being ridiculous.”

“No, you know what’s ridiculous, you not trusting me to the point you had to go through my phone. Spencer, I have done NOTHING to show you that you cannot trust me. That’s so fucking low. If something is bothering you, you can talk to me, you don’t have to go through my personal stuff.” You rose your voice a little at the end,

“Can I? Can I really talk to you about anything these days without you starting a fight over it?” He shot back,

“Me? Spencer, you’re the one who gets angry at me for breathing half the time.”

You were pulled from your memories as you heard the front door opening. Despite trying to quickly hide everything, you failed. Spencer walked into the kitchen and saw you causing you to freeze and looked at him.

“Y/N, are you..drunk?” He asked, worried as he walked over to you, helping you put everything in the correct place before walking over to you,

“You weren’t supposed to be home yet.” you slurred your words together but Spencer was usually good at figuring it out. He held onto you as he guided you towards the bedroom. You were okay with it until you remembered what he did to you so you stopped in your tracks,

“Don’t touch me.” You said, shaking him off you, but you immediately began to wobble and fall, until he grabbed onto you again.

“Let me help you.” He whispered, and you caved and let him take you back to the bedroom. As he got you into bed, he sat on the bed, next to you for a moment, in silence, before he spoke,

“I had to come back for a file but I’ll be back by the time you wake up, okay?” He talked softly and you nodded, slowly drifting in and out of tiredness. You were completely out before Spencer had even left the bed.

~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~

Waking up, your head was banging. You don’t remember ever getting into bed, until you look over at the nightstand and there’s a cup of water, medicine, and a note. You smile faintly as you reach over and take the medicine and take a drink of the water to chase the pill. You pick up the note and read it,

We really need to talk. I’ll be home in the morning.

Spencer

You knew what was coming. You knew what was waiting for you the moment Spencer got home and you prayed he would get held up on a case and would be home late, but you also knew that would help nothing. You spent the rest of the time, sitting in bed, anxiously scrolling through your phone. Spencer sent you a text when he was on his way home but you didn’t reply.

Way too soon for your liking, you heard the front door open and you drug yourself out of bed. Slowly and carefully you walked out of the bedroom and you instantly caught Spencer’s look. He looked so tired, so stressed, so drained, and you felt like you were part, if not the whole reason. He motioned for you guys to sit on the couch and you followed, sitting on the couch next to him. Being this close to him gave you a perfect sight of how dark the skin under his eyes actually was like he hadn’t been sleeping. His hair was messier, way messier than normal like he’d been running his fingers through it constantly.

“Y/N, I know that you’ve felt it too..the tension between us, the constant yelling and arguing.” He started, and you nodded, you didn’t trust yourself to not cry if you opened your mouth. He continued, “I didn’t know how bad it was affecting you, until last night.” He whispered softly, he turned his gaze down to the ground, “I never wanted to be the reason that you drink again, that was never something I wanted.”

You reached over and grabbed his hand slowly, for comfort, but he slowly and hesitantly pulled his hand away. You retracted your hand back into your lap, the tears were definitely falling now.

“Spencer..please.” was all you could manage to get out.

“Yesterday, when I was going through your phone I wasn’t lying when I said I wasn’t looking for a reason to leave..but I was looking for a reason to stay.” He confessed, looking up at you again. You felt your heart shatter. As he looked at you, even through your blurry vision, you could tell he was on the verge of tears as well.

“Did..did you find one?” You asked, sniffling and wiping your tears away off your cheek. You knew the answer because if I was what you wanted the answer to be, you wouldn’t be sat here having this talk.

“No,” Spencer whispered as he began to break down in front of you. You couldn’t help yourself from leaning over and pulling him into a hug. He wasted no time wrapping his arms around you, pulling you close to him. You guys had been each other’s rocks for so long, you didn’t know anything else.

You guys were like that for well over an hour. Just sitting there, in each other’s arms, crying. Maybe you guys were just putting off the hardest part, but you didn’t care. Finally, you pulled away and Spencer let go as well. You moved back on the cushion of the couch you were originally sat on. You wiped your tear stain cheeks with your hands, before reaching over and wiping his away next.

“I love you, Spencer, so much. So fucking much.” You started, “and I know you love me just the same amount but, we don’t love each other in the same way.”

“I know,” His voice was raspy and quiet from crying.

“You’ve been drinking, I haven’t been sleeping, this isn’t good for us anymore.” He admitted,

“I know,” You said, your voice barely a whisper.

“This is goodbye.”

“I know,”

Neither of you moved. Neither of you knew what to do. Who was going where, who was supposed to stay in this apartment that you’ve shared all your memories together in? You eventually stood up,

“I’m going to call my sister,” you said before walking out of the living room back into the bedroom. You didn’t explain anything as you asked her to come pick you up and you packed a bag. Carrying the bag out of the room, you enter the living room again, Spencer is still on the couch, he hadn’t moved an inch. You walked over to the front door, and pulled your keys from your purse, you took the key to the apartment off your keyring and placed it on the table next to the door,

“Goodbye, Spencer.” You said before opening the door and walking out. As you closed the door behind you, once it was closed fully, that’s when it fully hit you. You were never going to see the love of your life again and god, that was the most soul-crushing thing you’ve ever experienced.

#spencer reid #spencer reid smut #spencer reid fan #spencer reid fanfiction #Matthew Gray Gubler #Criminal Minds #criminal minds fic #Spencer Reid fic #5sos

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poptod · 4 years

Text

Arcadian (Ahkmenrah x Reader)

Description: Ahk gets some time away from the busy life of a prince, and meets you by chance at the riverside.

Notes: People who read my AO3 stories know I do this, but I shorten Ahkmenrah’s name to Ahkmen, for historical reasons, as well as change (Y/N) to something more historically accurate :) also this one is Gender Neutral!

No AO3 link, another Tumblr Special I guess

Words: 2.1k

Generally speaking, he’s not technically allowed to leave the palace, but there’s not exactly a rule in place keeping him there, either. It’s definitely telling when his heart races as guards turn the corner and he hides - that tells him he’s not doing the right thing. Not that he knows what the right thing is. All he knows is that his life is suffocating, what with his parents constant observation of him and his brothers’ hatred towards him. Besides that it’s apparent that he’s going to become Pharaoh, which he hadn’t expected at any time in his life, and it’s not something he’s at all prepared for. So midnight of the day he publicly breaks down in front of his parents, his parents advisors, and his brother, he sneaks out his window and runs off into the desert.

It doesn’t take long before the reality of how bad of an idea this is hits him - the nile beside him runs slow, the water murky and unable to reflect the stars. He feels just as muddled as the water, and he crouches down beside it, heart heavy and thoughts full.

“You alright?” Comes a smooth voice from above him, startling him out of his kneeling position. He falls to the ground and looks up to find you - dressed in an unfamiliar fashion, a stranger who’s asking after his wellbeing.

“Um…” he can’t think of what to say, too unsure of who he is in your mind. “Yes. I just… was relaxing.”

“Ah,” you say with a nod, and you smile understanding at him. He lets out a sigh of relief and you kneel beside him, gathering water from the nile in the basket you hold in your arms. “So what’s your name?”

“Ahk -“ he almost says his full name - “Just Ahk.”

“Nice. I’m Ife. Nice to meet you,” you say with another smile, brighter than he imagines he’s ever smiled. “What brings you here?”

“I, uh… I don’t really know,” he mumbles with a shrug, shifting into a more comfortable sitting position. “I’ve just been really stressed. Had to get away.”

“That’s understandable. This is a nice place to unwind,” you say, grunting as you dump out the muddy water.

“Yeah.. um, what are you doing, exactly?”

“I wanted to capture a fish as a pet.”

“A what?”

“A fish pet. Father wouldn’t help me, so I thought I could do it by myself, but…” you glance out over the long stretch of the Nile, sighing forlorn. “I think I’ll just play with one for a while then release it. Sounds more humane.”

He shrugs, and you wade out into deeper waters, and place the basket between your legs, the slow water drifting into the basket. Making himself comfortable he watches you, chuckling softly when you swear quietly to yourself. Eventually you move deeper, till the water nearly comes up to your waist, which worries Ahkmen - you’re not exactly a very tall or strong-looking person. With a huff he stands, shirking his more expensive clothing and wading out into the water to meet you.

You don’t note his appearance with any sound or movement, so he stands behind you, making sure you don’t drift away, and he keeps an eye out for any predators. When you raise your basket one final time, a small fish the size of his pinkie finger is inside it, and you gasp delightedly, a brilliant smile shines on your face. Careful to balance the basket he helps you back, holding a firm grip on your upper arm in case you slip on anything.

At the edge of the shore, your bare feet dipped into the warm water, the basket sits between the two of you, and a very confused fish flitters back and forth.

“Do you live far from here?” He asks you after a moment of silence, and your stare at the fish breaks as you glance up at him.

“I live down the nile. It’s not too far if you want to visit?” You suggest quietly, examining him for any sign of either declining or accepting your offer. A soft blush creeps up his neck and into his cheeks as he looks nervously to the side - would your family recognize him?

“Uh, I don’t know, I… I wouldn’t want to intrude,” is what he comes up with, fiddling anxiously with his fingers. You shrug, looking down at the fish and swirling your finger in the water.

“It’s not a problem. I’m sure everyone’s still asleep anyway,” you say, your attention never drifting from a fish he considers to be quite plain, but maybe there’s something he can’t see that’s caught your interest. He looks down, and nope - still looks like a small, grey fish, not even reflective.

“I need to be back in Memphis by sunrise, at the latest,” he tells you, his shoulders tightening.

“Memphis? I’ve been there. Beautiful place,” you mumble distantly as the fish rubs up against your finger by accident. When the fish adamantly ignores you for a minute, you turn back to him, smiling sweetly. “I can make sure you’re back there if you’d like. Might be a nice break from your responsibilities.”

He can’t help but agree - a tense sigh leaves him and with another breath he relaxes. You ruffle his hair (no one’s ever done that before, and it shocks him that he likes it) and dump the water and the fish back into the nile. Standing, you help him to his feet and, tucking your basket underneath your arm, you lead the way to your village.

Your previous prediction turned out to be correct; no one was awake. The dying embers of a fire burn dim in the bonfire, and you sit down in front of it, Ahk at your side. You toss the basket behind you, scoot closer to your new friend, and lean against his shoulder. For a second he tenses, looking down at you, then forces himself to relax - for some unknown reason, he feels more special in this moment than he ever has before.

“You’re very nice, you know. You should be more careful with strangers,” he notes, wishing as soon as the words are out that he hadn’t said anything at all.

“I’m perfectly careful. I know how to defend myself, Ahk,” you giggle, leaning closer into his warmth despite the fact that it’s not an especially cold night. Sighing, he rests his cheek on the top of your head, staring up at the stars that glimmer in the dark swath of night.

You hum to yourself a melody he’s never heard, your voice barely there, fading in and out of existence in your tired state.

“What’s being a prince like?” You mumble, fumbling till you’re even closer to him, wrapping your arms to hug his left arm. He freezes - that definitely wasn’t information he gave you.

“How’d you know I’m -“

“Clothes,” you answer before he finishes.

“Oh. Um, well… it’s a lot. Has its’ challenges, all very different from your life, I suppose,” he sums up, hoping he doesn’t offend you. He knows how lucky he is, and he knows that life for you is most likely harder than his own, even though you’re not responsible for a thousand people like he is.

“Good food?” You ask, your blinking slowing to a snail’s pace.

“Yeah,” he chuckles. “Good food.”

As the night progresses he finds himself reluctant to wake you, fast asleep on his shoulder, and even more reluctant to leave your haven. There’s a peace radiating through your village that he’s never felt before, a life far simpler and happier than his own, though the labor needed to stay alive he knows is grueling. Still, he stays there, by your side, and when he feels his own eyes grow heavy with exhaustion he lays the both of you down on the soft ground, his arm wrapped around you. You mumble incoherently in your sleep, scoot closer to him, and wrap your own arm round his waist. Distantly, he smiles to himself, and falls asleep.

Morning comes, and there’s a very large man above him, kicking him awake. Startled he jumps up, ready to apologize profusely before he sees you standing beside the man, a sleepy smile still apparent.

“Come on, let’s get you home,” you say, and wordlessly (and still blushing) he agrees, letting you lead the way.

It’s a somewhat cooler morning, and the water seems to be clearer than it was the night before. Birds fly about, singing cheerful songs along the banks of the nile. Soft wind blows through the trees, and you stop him by a date tree, climbing up it like you’ve done it a million times before, which he reckons you have.

“Breakfast,” you announce with a giggle, hanging upside down from the upper vestiges of the tree, shaking it so the fruit falls to the ground. Laughing at your antics he catches a few, quickly throwing them away when you release yourself from the tree. Just in time he catches you in his arms, and in thanks you peck his cheek, lighting a brilliant blush on them.

“By the way,” you begin once you’ve both eaten, “I’m sorry I broke my promise.”

“What do you mean?”

“I told you I’d get you back to Memphis by sunrise. It’s far past that,” you say, looking up to the sun which lies a thumbs width above from the distant mountains. His father will most likely be angry with him and he knows this, but he just shrugs - no need to worry you and himself by extension.

“It’s alright. Nothing bad’ll happen, just my parents might be a little worried. They know I can handle myself though,” he tells you, and with a sigh, you nod, and release your anxieties.

“You’re welcome back at my home anytime you’d like, I don’t think my father dislikes you, which is saying something. He’s a little hard to please. I… I hope we can be friends,” you add at the end, quiet and more timid than he’s ever heard you.

“I hope so too,” he admits softly, and the two of you continue your walk in silence.

Eventually you find the discarded golden robes from last nights’ wade, and he quickly brushes them off, putting everything but the cape back on. Instead he wraps it around your shoulders, smiling bright when you blush at the gesture.

“Looks better on you,” he says, fluffing out the cape so it spreads like golden wings behind you.

“Belongs to you,” you chide with a quiet laugh, but you keep the cape on - it can’t hurt, you reason, for just a little longer. The material is the softest you’ve ever felt, an obvious relic of a royal. It’s light but warm, and you can’t help but giggle a little when you wrap yourself up in it.

He blushes sweetly at the image of you, wishing he could see you every day, and disheartened at the knowledge he can’t ever have you - not in any way that matters. But for the rest of the walk he ignores that little voice in his head, fidgeting with the gold bracelets on his wrists as he watches every idiosyncrasy of you.

At the gates of the city he reluctantly lets you leave him there, the golden cape back on his own shoulders. He stands there, feeling more lonely than ever till you vanish in the brush of the nile. An unexplainable urge courses through him, alighting every sense in him, and he runs after you - one more thing he has to do.

It’s not long before he catches up; you don’t walk very fast. He grabs your arm from behind and you jump, relaxing when you see it’s him.

“What’s wrong?” You ask, tilting your head curiously to the side. His heart melts at the sight and without second thought, he kisses the sweetest memory into you, moving innocently against your lips until you part with a shocked gasp.

“I… sorry, I -“

You move your hand up into his hair, weaving your fingers into it before you push him back down towards you, interrupting his speech with a kiss softer and impossibly more loving than his own. This time when you part it’s much more gentle, less of a shock, and much more human.

“I suppose I’ll see you again?” He asks, and the desperation in his voice is embarrassingly clear.

“Of course,” you answer with a wonderfully familiar smile.

#ahkmenrah x reader #ahkmenrah #night at the museum #rami malek #ahkmenrah x male reader #ahkmenrah x female reader

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theinnerhalf · 3 years

Text

2019 in Review: Highlights

Making a venture back into writing again with this “year in review”. I guess I’m slightly less damaged than I was last year and have finally built the courage to write about how this year was for me, even some dark times included. Thank you 2019, for not much, but I guess thank you. A “fuck you” would be more appropriate but regardless, I’m grateful. Let’s do this.

January 2019

An extremely slow start to the new year, as it usually is when it comes to me. My January’s tend to be bleak, gray, and cold especially considering the coming down from a constant holiday high. I spent this first month with friends I could call my family, regularly going out as much as we could while the two military guys (EJ and James) are here for the time being. In this month as well, I got to finally meet up with my ex who I can now proudly call a friend. Diana and I were able to catch up extensively to make up for all the lost time, talking about things like how we’ve been, the changes, the constants, and occasionally reminiscing. I know I’ve felt at peace before already, for having her back into my life rather than staying a bittersweet memory, but getting to catch up like this was a whole other type of joy I didn’t know I needed. As for the picture of the pants, I finally made the decision to buy a pair of jeans that I wanted soooo so bad from one of my favorite designers.

February

Goodness...Where do I even start for this month?...Like January, February for me is usually bleak. Regardless it being a month for “love”, it sucked. Maybe the worst for me in the year. The start of this month wasn’t all too bad though! There was a fashion show that Celine was walking/modeling for held at Rice University in order to celebrate Asian cultures and Chinese New Year. The show overall was alright...I guess it was just nice to be out supporting Celine and whatnot. I thought this month would at least provide a break for me, but just five days later, my grandma was sent to the ICU after suffering from a stroke...It happened so suddenly...Celine and I were at an outing when the two of us came back to my place and ran into my dad who was leaving in a hurry. He had a lost look on his face, as well as panicky and shifty eyes. He broke the news to us and had the sinking feeling in me hit so fast. The next thing I know, we’re at the hospital waiting room, anxiously waiting to be briefed with (hopefully) good news. I remember disassociating when the doctor had finally came to us, thinking that this really couldn’t be happening...not to us...not to my dad. I remember thinking that this isn’t fair...We literally had just gotten her into our lives’ and now we’re losing her.

We spent the following week trading stays at the hospital between my siblings and cousins. I can’t remember the proper psychology term for the feeling of false hope and security for an event that seems to be too horrible to be true, but that was what I had felt for the entire time. There’s no way that my family could lose our grandma like this...and not this soon. Just a day before my grandma’s stroke happened, she was asking when my younger sister and I were going to get married. The two of us looked at each other like, “What the fuuuu--? Where is this coming from?” My grandma explained shortly after that she felt as if she didn’t have much longer for her time here with us, and that she wanted to have the honor to make the dresses and suits for Lacel’s or my wedding. I couldn’t stop thinking about it. I couldn’t stop thinking about how cruel and merciless the world could be, but also at the same time, that I should’ve known better and that I should be used to this...I should be but I would rather not. I think it was after a week and a half where I found that my grandma would be transferred to a hospice. My family had told me this and I was under the impression that hospices were for people who had recovered enough that they don’t need to be in a hospital but still needed professional caretakers. I told this to Andrew and Quin and they both shared painful and shocked expressions with each other. I asked why they were looking at each other like that and then they broke it to me that hospices were for people who didn’t have much time left. I remember crying in front of them that day during work.

Virginia Barreda passed away, February 19, 2019. My family grieved separately and in different ways. I slept off the entire day...The picture of the room was how my grandma left the room right before she was taken to the hospital and was left untouched for the entire duration of the situation. I embarrassingly and shamefully made a gofundme to help raise money so that my family and I could attend her final farewell back home in the Philippines. I thought it wouldn’t get anywhere...but my heart...I was so surprised to see the amount of love and support that friends and even strangers had decided to put out, and I was touched beyond anything I had ever expected. A big thank you to those who donated and have come across this post by any way. You have my sincerest gratitude and even with that, I cannot thank you enough.

To end the note on a positive note at least, Celine and I hit one year at the end of this month. Amazing.

March

My family and I were in such a weird head space entering this month. There was a lot of recovering to be made and coming out of the state of denial from my grandma’s passing. It was like a new chapter of our lives abruptly opened itself onto us and we all did not know how to proceed. My dad was stressing out over medical expenses and how we were going to afford to bring the entire family to Philippines for my grandma’s final resting place. I did my best to keep the gofundme a secret from him, because knowing my dad, he would not accept the money under any condition. He only came to find out about it because some of his friends and relatives came across it, donated, and then told him about how sentimental and touching my gofundme passage was. He just asked why, and I regrettably said that it was because we were struggling out here and all I wanted to do was help. After some convincing with the help of my two sister’s, my dad accepted the help and agreed that we can now at least afford to take my dad for the initial ceremony while the rest of us would follow-up, hopefully in the summer or late 2019.

The first picture in this month’s set is of the Pieta in Italy, taken by Lacel. Lacel was on a two week school trip, while in the second picture is the view my dad had while his two week stay in the Philippines. Both my older sister and I stayed at home while envying our dad’s and Lacel’s experiences. Their trips only served as motivation for me to save up a lot more for Japan and I really wanted to make that happen no matter what. Even if it meant me going alone, I was ready to accept it.

The following pictures of Lacel are when they came back from Italy and celebrated their two years of being clean/no relapses. I know I rarely ever let it be known, but I really do care and love my younger sister a lot, and to see them make it this far in the span of two years meant so much to me. I’m glad that my family was able to celebrate that milestone in Lacel’s life because it was definitely quite the journey. The last photo is of my car’s fourth brake light functioning again with Travis’ help and was fixed just in time for the long drive to Marfa.

April

Really, the only one significant highlight for this month, which I am incredibly excited to share, was the moderately spontaneous trip I took out to Marfa, Texas with Yentl. I do have to say, the two of us were quite ambitious for taking on this trip by leaving Houston around 12am shortly, after grabbing oh my gogi and some boba. With the help of a trenta iced coffee, I was able to knock out 6 hours of the 8 hour drive. While the drive was a lot of fun, I started getting really sleepy around the 4 hour mark but it started raining extremely hard after we had passed San Antonio. I was so reluctant to switch over to Yentl driving because I had been losing traction every now and then. It was only until the sun rose that we finally had passed the rain. I shortly knocked out after the switch.

I woke up to Yentl ecstatically saying, “We’re heeeeere!” I opened my eyes and was immediately blinded, forgetting that daytime was a thing. But from the short time my eyes were open, I saw a railroad and buildings styled from days of the past. I fought to keep my eyes open only to tell myself, maybe five more minutes. As soon as we parked, Yentl and I took the opportunity to walk around.The weather was pleasant, not too hot and not too cold either. The humidity that seems to be a pestering presence in Houston was nowhere to be found in Marfa, so the daytime stroll was bliss. The two of us checked out Marfa’s welcome sign, the city hall (only from the outside because it was closed), a couple of local shops and art galleries, and the hotel Paisano, a hotel best known for having a movie shot in it.

All the walking had made us hungry...That and the only thing inside of us were boba and caffeine. Yentl and I checked out a place called Aster’s that was primarily a breakfast joint recommended to us by a person working at the welcome center. We both got an egg’s benedict. Me with a lemonade, and her an iced coffee. After eating, we proceeded to go to our Airbnb located 30 minutes away at another small town called Alpine. The Airbnb’s neighborhood was located in some rural area with cliffs surrounding it all. The Airbnb itself was a small and cute place that was divided into just three small parts: the bedroom, living room, and a bathroom. Yentl and I freshened up, put on the new fits, and made our way back to Marfa.

Headed back, we decided that we would first go see the outlandish Prada store located in the middle of the desert. The Prada store itself is a permanent art installation by artists Elmgreen and Dragset, built with the concept of using biodegradable materials so that the art installation could eventually return and be reclaimed back to Earth as all things eventually do. The drive to Prada, Marfa was an unexpectedly longer drive than I thought. It was a non-stop view of your textbook Western landscape...Desolate, scattered with ordinary desert shrubbery, and one thing to set it apart, a lonely, silver blimp just casually floating at the wind’s mercy.

When we finally arrived, it looked surreal to say the least. The building was so unexpectedly placed, yet at the same time, it wasn’t intrusive to the desert landscape. There were less people there than I had thought, which made it easier for Yentl and I to take the photos we wanted. What a pleasant oddity it was, I thought, to even drive eight hours just to see this left me with a sense of fulfillment knowing that this had been on my personal bucket list for quite some time.

The two of us made our way back to the city to kill some more time before it was time to see the mystery Marfa lights. We checked out a bookstore placed in the lobby of a hotel, wandered around the from one edge of the town to the other, checked out some more art galleries, and ate dinner at a local BBQ place. The sun was on the verge of setting so we headed to the viewing area that was located right beside the highway. We got there conveniently early and was able to secure a good parking spot as there was not even a designated parking lot. Yentl and I situated ourselves onto a bench with a clear view of the field. We both sat there in amazement of the sunset…layers on layers of colors dancing in the sky, almost a love letter to us from the sun itself, as it sank over the horizon, tucking itself in to say goodnight. The two of us couldn’t wrap our heads around the fact that we actually did this, an 8-hour drive to see some art and an unexplained natural phenomenon that happens in the desert at night. We really did this.

The sky turned from its calm lilac tones to an enveloping darkness and what followed were gasps of oooooh’s and aaaaah’s. It was finally happening. We peered over the horizon, somewhat confused, and there it was. Beside a constant blinking red light, appeared the mystery lights, bobbing up and down inconsistently, disappearing and reappearing on a whims notice. Yentl and I watched in awe and pondered about the mysteries of life like, does the supernatural exist, are there aliens out there, and what does it truly mean to love? Apart from the mystery lights themselves, the stars overhead was truly a sight to take in. The indescribable feeling of being small while looking up at the stars happens to be a favorite sensation of mine, but only this time, I was overwhelmed by it. I found a completely empty bench to lay down on just to look up. It must have been the most relaxed I have been since forever and I never wanted the feeling to end…But as all good things do, it did. Yentl and I made our way back to our Airbnb after catching what seemed to be a UFO flying above us. Marfa truly was surreal.

The two of us rested for the night, packed our stuff the next day, and made our way on the long journey back home.

May

The start of this month initially started incredibly slow. Not much has been done aside from learning how to shoot better on film which I spent a lot of my time on. I would keep pestering my friends to let me use them as models and surprisingly, they agreed! The first three photos are just a few of the pictures taken. This was also the month that the restaurant I work at, Noon (previously known as Verts, also previously known as Vertskebap), had undergone the change to being Daphne’s Greek Mediterranean. The change allowed us to finally get tips trough credit cards and no longer just cash tips. This allowed me to leave my shifts with a lot more money in hand.

It occurred to me…with this I could finally make my Japan trip a reality…In the span of just a week, I was able to raise 100 dollars in just tips alone (I know this doesn’t sound like a lot, but this is a big difference coming from leaving work with no more than 50 cents to 5 dollars on a busy day). I decided that the tip money would be strictly set aside for Japan and Japan only. I thought at the rate it was going, a 100 dollars per week would be sufficient for a trip set out in October/November. The rough estimate was at least around 2000 dollars if I decided I would really stay true to my word and not touch this extra money.

In this month also, my little sister got their associates degree in art, which I am really proud of! They then decided that they would be continuing their education at the university of Texas at Dallas. The last picture is a picture of one of my favorite musicians, blackbear, taken at a concert for his DEAD 2 THE WORLD tour. It was my second time getting to see him perform live, and while he was not in the best health to perform my favorite song the way that he usually does, it was still quite the experience. I would be more than happy to see him perform live again, and hopefully in better health.

June

Ahhh June. What better way to start of this month by getting into an accident…My neighbor ran into the passenger side door of my car while they were reversing and failed to see that I had already pulled out first. Extremely disappointing knowing how much my car means to me…What followed shortly after were series of looking for a trustworthy and affordable auto body and collision shop to do the work while being able to get covered by the person at fault’s insurance. Was honestly such a convoluted process and was so stressful that a part of me decided that maybe I would just leave and live with it. I ended up finding a shop called legendary auto and agreed to the other person’s insurance’s choice to only cover 80 percent of the costs because I allegedly had some “preventative measure” on stopping the collision from happening. Me, tired and not in the mood for a disagreement, agreed. I just wanted my car back to the way it was before.

The next highlight for this month was for an overnight camping trip I took out with my family and other family friends somewhere near Austin. It was a lot of fun! Everything was nearly perfect with the trip aside from the sweltering heat combined with a THICK humidity that made its dominance extremely clear. I remember there being so much good food…and with family friends that you’ve grown up with, there was never a shortage of people telling you to eat more when you just downed three plates of crawfish, bbq, and rice. There were boats and a tractor with a little tow for people to ride on in the back, a working NES system, a basketball court, playground, and an entire forest to explore. We spent our time playing card/board games, held a basketball competition, the dads versus the boys, a bonfire complete with smores, and a sad attempt at a Marvin’s room music video, complete with a hot tub and color changing lights.

Spending your time consistently outdoors resets your internal clock, and so by 9, everyone had started to get ready for bed. I remember being outside on the campgrounds and it being pitch black. Not being able to see past 15 feet in front of me at the most. One look at the sky in this setting and there was the full moon. Brighter than I had ever witnessed it…almost blinding to be honest. The older “kids” were cooped up in the RV designated for more kids to sleep in and were there playing monopoly deal. I joined in and found ourselves playing monopoly deal until 2am until I called it a night. I woke up the next day, sad to leave earlier than we’d have to because I had a shift at work to attend to even with all the begging I did with my other coworkers to cover for me.

As for the rest of this month’s highlights, I finally got the see the Van Gogh exhibit that was here at the Museum of Fine Arts. It was the most packed I have ever seen the MFAH in a long time and was glad that I was able to see Van Gogh’s work as art is always inspiring to me…Sad that the starry night wasn’t there but that’s alright. I also got to visit and hang out with Yentl this month during a trip I made to Dallas for Lacel’s scholarship interview. I haven’t seen her since our trip to Marfa and we got to talking about the Japan trip we’d be potentially taking out in the fall. We had Gyu-kaku (which she covered for like BRUH) and went over the possible itinerary that I had been researching for months now. As usual, it was always nice to see her, and I left Dallas feeling even more hopeful and motivated for the trip.

July

After one long month, I finally got my car back in perfect condition! So exciting to see my car just the way it used to be…Marwan and the rest of his team over at Legendary auto have all my gratitude for doing a stellar job. Could not thank them enough. For this month also, my family and I visited Galveston for the 4th of July, mainly for a parade and pleasure pier. It was a really nice experience getting to spend a whole outing with my family which we aren’t able to do often considering how busy we all are. Even more so with Lacel going to school soon in an entirely different city the following month. As for the final highlight of this month, I got to catch up on life with Lexi as we talk about the occurrences of life and sometimes even the past and how much we’ve grown from it. Always an experience to see her and it’s so interesting to see how I get to hang out with her during my days in college when in high school, we weren’t all that close.

August

I kicked off this month by helping my younger sister pack and move into their apartment in Dallas. We had to rent a car for all their stuff to fit because the 86 definitely was not able to carry everything that Lacel was bringing. It was a quick and pretty emotional ordeal, having one last dinner together as a family, and then having to say goodbye. I thought that would be the last time I would see my sister for a long time, but soon enough, I found myself making a trip to Dallas once a week for five weeks straight haha.

For the next highlight, it’s just a picture of me reveling in the fact that I had finally mustered the courage to go and change my major from nursing to journalism. I was shocked by how much easier it would’ve been for me to finish my associates if I had done this so much sooner. I found myself with only two more semesters, and maybe even just one if I had dedicated myself to just school. Also, in August, I had been unemployed for about two months prior. Shoutout to Daphne’s for pulling the rug from underneath my friends and I without any warning whatsoever. A double-edged sword might I admit, because while it left me unemployed suddenly, the closing of Daphne’s allowed to me find more opportunities and finally be free from the comfort of familiarity that the restaurant had provided me for about four years. Being in H-E-B made me realize how much I was missing out on such a good work environment. Everyone was absurdly and unbelievably nice…The customers in my H-E-B are also nothing compared to the customers I dealt with in food service and my goodness, it was such a nice change of pace. Happy to be here, cause after all, “here, everything’s better.”

For the last highlight of this month, Celine threw an e-boi/girl themed late birthday party. It was honestly really well set up, especially with the Airbnb and the vibes it had come with. They were constantly anxious about how their party would end up and I was always telling them that it would be a lot of fun! Which in fact, it did turn out to be a lot fun and it was so interesting to see everyone so dedicated to the theme of the party. Seeing Celine around a lot of the people they care about was really something, and to see them have such a fun and good time was all that mattered.

A little later into this month, Celine and I decided to end things on a mutual note. Things had been comfortable for a while, and while there may have still been feelings, things have stagnated…A lot…My mental health at this point of our relationship wasn’t anywhere close to where I’d want it and things haven’t been okay with me for a long time. I spent a lot of my time getting triggered over the past and my thought process started falling towards methods of self-destruction rather than dealing with things head on. I found myself either in a constant state of anger or depression over not knowing how to deal with the thoughts eating away at me. Had I waited any longer, I’m not sure what I would have done.

Sad as that may have been…It was ultimately for the better. At least I hoped it was…

September

(Insert obligatory “Do you remember”) September was thankfully one of the better and more eventful months out of the year and kicked it off with Yentl’s birthday party. I remember making the 4-hour drive for the second year in a row just to celebrate a dear friend’s birthday. I arrived later than most and found myself in the middle of a really nice neighborhood where the Airbnb was located. Interesting, I thought. The area was devoid of streetlights with a lake nearby and made me hopeful that maybe a getaway like tonight could really take me away from all that was going on in my head. I’ll drink to that.

I shyly walked in, asking people where Yentl was. I was led to the kitchen where she was and found her already multiple drinks in. Received a tight hug from her and was cordially invited to start drinking haha. I told her that I’ll a eat a little bit, maybe get re-acquainted with everyone and the Airbnb first, properly settling in before I find myself trying to drown my demons lurking behind the corner, waiting to make themselves present in my conscience. I held my trusty detox water, comprised of lemon and limes, tightly, hoping it’d be my saving grace for this party. The objective for the night: Survive…But have a good time. I chatted up with people I haven’t seen in so long…probably since Yentl’s last birthday but I guess because of the vibes the party had, it felt incredibly easy to converse.

I made my way to the pool where everyone happened to be in the meantime. Too self-conscious to jump in so I just snapshotted everyone on film for the most part. Took the liberty and made myself the party’s personal photographer for the night. I went back inside to admire the Airbnb a little bit more or sneak a drink by myself but was ushered to take shots of someone’s personal tequila concoction. “I hate tequila”, I thought…but why not? The vibe was right and the goal was to get out of my mind one way or another. I downed it, regrettably. The burn of the tequila was reminiscent of the nights I spent uncoordinated, lacking self-control, and being passed out in a fetal position beside a toilet fighting for dear life. After recollecting myself after that shot, I was immediately handed another one while not realizing it. Everybody started bracing themselves for the shot, gathering their chasers and mentally preparing for the hit while I on the other hand, looked at everybody and the cup in my possession utterly appalled at the situation unfolding in front of me. Three…two…one…cheers.

After that, the rest of the night was a blur. There came I point where I nearly blacked out because my vision had nearly gone, but after two full servings of my detox water, I was all good to go. I spent the rest of the night just talking, occasionally grooving to Jayson’s live mixing, playing smash bros and leaving undefeated, making conversations, and trying my best to stay out of my head. The party had started to slow down so I went outside to sit by the pool with a glass of wine and admire the quiet and stillness of the night. The backyard overlooked a lake and I was reminded by how nice this Airbnb really was. The moon wasn’t out so it was extra dark and allowed for some reflecting on a couple things, like the break-up…maybe on how lonely I was feeling. I watched some ducks pass by and called it a night. I went back inside and saw Yentl passed out on one of the couches. Made sure she was okay, and we had a conversation about several things, like the break-up…and how lonely I was feeling. Eventually the conversation ventured onto more positive things like how nice this Airbnb is, how nice this party was, some unwanted drama that happened during this party, and the upcoming Japan trip.

After just spending a little more time with each other, and a disagreement on who would take the last bed and sleep on the couch, we said goodnight as she had declared I get the bed. Had to respect the birthday girl’s wishes, even when it was her who had paid for the entirety of this Airbnb…Not to disclose that information or anything, but it was a LOT. I woke up, surprisingly not hungover all thanks to the detox water. As much as I had wanted to stay for any further hangouts of the day, I had to leave for a shift at 2pm. I drove the four-hour drive back home hastily, only to find out that I wasn’t needed for work and that I could actually take the day off…Amazing. Thankful that I was able to attend the party in the first place and see Yentl at all.

The following highlight was a concert I attended in Dallas for the artist Aries’ Welcome Home tour and was a largely anticipated experience for both my younger sister and I. Aries had grown to be one of my favorite artists because of how new and refreshing his sound was. I also happened to find his music during a defining point in my life, specifically during a three hour mindless drive leading to nowhere and found myself halfway to San Antonio and has become the mood and aesthetic I had been living in for a quite a while now. Months prior, my sister and I had been listening to him constantly in preparation for this concert. My only concern was that since Aries is a smaller artist, the concert might only end up being more like a listening party rather than him actually performing. By listening party, I mean that his songs are playing in the background and is overpowering his vocals or that he’s not performing for majority of the time.

My sister and I arrived at the venue with the discovery of a line that wrapped around the entire block. The suspense was too real. The feeling of knowing that I just happened to stumble upon Aries from a YouTube video of him remixing a Post Malone song into a lo-fi one, to him suddenly having the anthem of the entire spectrum of my anger and the prolonging bitterness that dwelled inside me. His music is definitely a trigger, but in a different way. His music gets me angry but doesn’t drive me to a seething, blinding rage the way I see anything remotely related to skateboarding, tall fuckboys with curly hair, or the name Kevin (fuck you Kevin…fuck you!). If anything, his music was a testament to the three months of mental and emotional anguish I had undergone earlier in 2018. I was more than ready to yell my heart and lungs out to the lyrics, “fuck your friend, that man’s a bitch, probably wish I don’t exist”, and “Promise that I will stay out of reach, far gone, cause the shit still bothers me.”

The concert left me speechless by how much energy there was from the crowd, the hype man, and Aries himself. While it may only have been just over an hour, it was the most invigorating concert I have attended by far. Probably the most fun too. As Lacel and I headed out after taking pictures with the venue and our tour merch, we were suddenly told that Aries had came out to greet people. We rushed back in and just stayed around, somewhat awkwardly, casually standing by as fans took pictures with or of him. He was able to sign a piece of paper that Lacel handed to him and he left shortly after taking a big group picture with the fans that were present. We left soon after, put on his Welcome Home album to relive the concert in the car, and got lost driving around Dallas for maybe another hour to end the night.

The last highlight for this month was Quin’s birthday celebration that him and his closest friends organized. The initial plan was to pre-game at Marian’s place and then follow up by going out to Washington Ave. which is notoriously known for Houston’s night life scene. I arrived at Marian’s apartment for the pre-game, and even before I could greet anyone, a friend came by me with a bottle of Hennessy and started pouring some in my mouth. “So it’s gonna be that type of night”, I thought haha. I finally got around to greeting everyone including the birthday boy who was in the middle of taking a shot and was then shortly handed one to take alongside Quin and a handful of other friends.

We eventually made our way to Washington Ave. in different Ubers and arrived at Concrete Cowboy. The whole group lined up and waited for our turn to get in. As we neared the entrance, I pulled out my ID in anticipation as I’m used to being told that I don’t look older than 19 most of the time. The bouncer let my friends in but said something to me that I couldn’t quite make out over the music blasting from inside. I said excuse me, thinking like, hello…my ID is legit, I promise you I’m legal and this is a valid ID haha. “No air forces”, he said. “What?”, “No air forces…”, he repeated. Back to the line I went, astonished that this was even a problem in the first place. I received a bunch of texts from my friends asking where I was and exclaimed to them that I was denied access because of the shoes I was wearing. I went to the little fence that Concrete had and exchanged my air force 1’s with Andrew’s dress shoes and lined up once more.

Eventually that was all a waste because the group ended up leaving Concrete Cowboy…WITHOUT the birthday boy. We crossed the street to another club/bar that escapes my memory but this time around they let me in regardless of my shoes. Immediately, this was already better than the experience with Concrete, from the music, the general vibe, to how less packed it was. Ruben bought everyone two rounds of shots for some reason, and it really helped loosen everybody up. While the group was having a lot of fun in this bar, a handful of us felt guilty that we were having this much fun without Quin and decided we should go back to Concrete to go celebrate with the person this night was originally dedicated to. We left to go line back up across the street, only to find others that also separated from Quin to come join us over where we were at…We all found ourselves back in the same bar/club we just left haha.

Feeling guilty of admitting to this, but we were having an absolute blast at the place we were at. My friends and I ended up having the biggest floor presence and had even started a cypher with the occasional strangers jumping in who had actual dance experience as well. My friends and I shook hands and even made friends with these strangers after finding out we had mutual dance friends and connections to major Houston dance studios like soundbox and soreal. 2PM had finally snuck its way into the night and it was time to go back to Marian’s to regroup. We arrived at Marian’s apartment to find out that Quin had gotten shitfaced at Concrete Cowboy. Quin! The same Quin who took 20+ shots on his 21st birthday, just to be fully coherent, coordinated, and mentally sound to take care of other people rather than being taken care of. There he was, bent over the toilet, clutching it for dear life. It was an absolute sight to behold, and one we would never let Quin live down. It was finally our turn to take care of him, and as friends that love Quin, we were more than happy to finally get the opportunity to pay the favor back.

October

My birth month. My favorite month too and well deserved so. October for me is the transition from the Hell that is Houston’s summer to those cool crisp Autumn afternoons. A transition from bright yellow and blue hues to the golden, orange, and amber tones that coincide with everything regarding the season of fall. Fall is Halloween. Fall is Thanksgiving. Fall is pumpkin picking and carving, apple pies, and the metaphorical dusk of the year, while interestingly sharing the same colors as a sunset. This month was surprisingly uneventful but was largely a pre-cursor for what was coming up in November: Yentl’s and my Japan trip.

The first highlight for this month was this photoshoot/hang out with fellow FRZ86 owners, Lily and Ray. I was meeting both of them for the first time and was excited that they both agreed to be models for further practice with my film camera. Really happy with how the shots came out, I felt ready for taking pictures in Japan and grew more confident in this new profound hobby. The following highlight for this month but not pictured for privacy reasons, was my approval for my travel visa. The news had me beaming. After days of gut-wrenching anxiety at the thought of refunding my airfare, the Airbnb, and all the plans just going to waste if I was not approved, the good news was a major sigh of relief. It had finally cemented the trip, and the only thing that was left, was to save as much as I can in this last month.

My money saving process for the rest of this month involved eating four slices of a day for lunch (only when I was at work), refusing to hang out, and reducing my eating out budget to just under 30 dollars. I was determined. My will power, incorruptible. I attended a hang out that involved eating, and I only spent my money on a drink. My savings were not going to be stopped…My birthday eventually came around and my family and I found ourselves in Dallas…for the second year in a row. I don’t remember exactly why we were celebrating MY birthday in Dallas just to hang out with my younger sister, but that’s just what went down. We went to Gen Korean BBQ for lunch, and followed up with boba (a must). We hung around a Kinokuniya for a little bit to kill time and were deciding on what we should do now. I just threw in that maybe we could stop by the Dallas galleria to just waste even more time, while in the back of my head, I had a burning desire to finally pull the trigger on something I’ve been wanting since the summer of 2017: a Gucci ghost ring.

I only mentioned my intentions to my younger sister because I knew my idea would be met with opposition and disappointment from my dad. After several times being asked why we had decided to go here, I mentioned that I was buying the ring, as a big gesture to myself for making it this far and as a final accessory to bring along to Japan for the outfits I had planned. Ran me back $250 dollars, but did I mind? Not one bit. So much for saving…haha.

To close out October, I departed for Dallas to pick up my sister and Yentl. The plan was to pick up Yentl from Dallas, drive back to Houston because that’s where we’ll be departing for Japan, have a layover BACK in Dallas, and after an 8-hour flight, arriving at Narita airport in Tokyo weirdly at the same time we had left from Dallas due to time zones. The plan sounds counterintuitive with the layover being in Dallas and all…but departing from Dallas added an extra 400 dollars to the airfare. It also worked because it meant that neither of us would have to make a 4-hour drive back home to our respective cities due to another layover in Dallas on the way back home.

November

This month will have an entire separate post dedicated to Japan.

Enjoy these pictures for the meantime.

December

After Japan. I had spent the rest of November coming down from the high I had experienced from my vacation. I had to deal with the come down as well as the seasonal depression that comes along with the shorter days of Winter, despite always being fond of the season. It’s going to sound a little silly to admit, but things really did start to lose meaning. I had this goal of traveling to Japan for as long as I could remember, and it was finally fulfilled! The long workdays, forty-hour work weeks, the months of research and planning, and just everything I had been doing was for the sake of trip.

Not wanting to feel as if my life had lost meaning, I forced myself to get into the holiday spirit…Or at least I tried. In the first highlight presented for this month was Travis’ Christmas present to me. A bunch of treats…and a gun. Yes, a gun. Looks like just a random assortment of food but in reality, has a ton of sentimental ties to it. As described by Travis himself, the honey buns were given because of one time we were in the campus cafeteria and I was craving honey buns. The campus was charging 2+ dollars for a single one and Travis was like, “Don’t waste your money here smh”, and told me he had spent just a little over a dollar for a multipack. The oreo thins were given because I had an obsession with oreos, the gummies because whatever, and the limon lays for a callback when Andrew, Travis, and I would have consecutive movie nights together on the summer of 2017 where we would pick our usual snacks from out midnight Walmart runs. Lastly, but definitely not least, the gun. Travis was concerned by how often I would go to so many places during the middle of the night and was also tired of being my personal protection considering he himself was armed.

The gifts left me speechless and admittedly, a little teary eyed by how thoughtful it really was. During the brief period of trying to take the moment all in, Andrew pulls out his very own and the entire room goes up in screams and laughter. Travis bought guns for the two of us! Unbelievable and entirely wild of him. I love that man to death.

The following highlight of the drink and the board game was when I finally had a first successful meeting from a connection I had on a dating app haha. Wooo Ral finally stepping out there after multiple awkward matches and getting ghosted on several platforms. The two of us met up in Dallas at a videogame restaurant bar thing, where we can eat/drink while playing on a console! Pretty cool idea and props to her for actually catering to what my interests were. Ended making a cool friend out of that meet up since. The rest of the following highlights were just more Christmas festivities such as, baking Christmas themed cookies, secret Santa with the OG5 + DJ, H-E-B white elephant Christmas party, and seeing Christmas lights with Jackie at the River Oaks neighborhood.

Just like this year in review itself, I was so eager to get the year over and done with. 2019 seemed to be bad year for the world, myself included, but finishing writing this up in 2021…I only wish I had treasured the moments just a little longer, not knowing what I will be missing the following year.

P.S. If you’re just a person randomly coming through this, thank you for your time to scroll/read

#year in review #2019

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