#is what I wrote under it as an explanation and is such a way better name | Explore Tumblr Posts and Blogs

coeurify · 10 months

Note

I have no idea how this would fit into an storyline but I am a hoe for fake dating. Imagine fake dating with abby and it slowly becoming too real

UGH YOU GET ME FAKE DATING IS ONE OF MY FAVORITE TROPES!!

⋆˚✿˖° now, abby anderson had a problem. specifically a blonde, brown eyed loud mouthed man of a problem. owen fucking moore. she had broken up with him in the summer time, little explanation given to the ass of a boyfriend other than that she needed to “find herself.” (not that she needed to give any.)

⋆˚✿˖° but owen? oh owen didn’t accept that. so from the very moment abby had broken it off, to when the air began to smell like fall.. he pestered abby. asked for a reason, begged for another chance (despite HIM going around with damn near every girl on the WLF compound.)

⋆˚✿˖° things came to a head at a get together in one of abby and owen’s mutual friend’s apartment style quarters. mutual friend who also happened to be your roommate.

⋆˚✿˖° abby and owen fought all night, abby’s cheeks red from embarrassment and anger, eyebrows furrowed together. “why can’t you just take no for an answer owen?“ the cup in her hand crackled a bit under the pressure when the man scoffed. “because you never give me a real answer!” abby’s arms crossed at that, searching around the room. quickly, and maybe a little impulsively, she shrugged. “i’m into someone else now.”

⋆˚✿˖° owen just couldn’t accept that, his arms thrown around dramatically. “so you like another guy? that’s why you wont give me another chance? you know i can treat you better.” that sentence alone reminded abby just why she hated being with him so much, but again that fast moving brain of hers spoke before the thought could finish, finger pointing in the direction of the first person she found.. you. “it’s not a guy. it’s a girl. im not.. into your..” abby made a motion, “species anymore.” sure, it was sort of true. abby recently realized she probably had a thing for girls, but you particularly? she couldn’t count on her fingers the amount of conversations she had with. “i like her.”

⋆˚✿˖° you, who’s head poked up, mouth full of slightly stale chips, having heard the whole conversation. abby anderson, beautiful, funny, madeyouweakintheknees, abby anderson was into you? and not straight? surely not. you swallowed harshly, deciding to play into whatever game abby seemed to have set on the floor. you made your way over, an award winning smile on your face as owen’s mouth dropped open further than a damn infected. “You like her? as in girls?”

⋆˚✿˖° honestly, you probably caused more trouble when you stood near the two, “abs!” you grinned, “you forgot your jacket here.. cmere ill grab it for you.” and then your hand is wrapped around her tensed bicep, the stiffness likely caused by her pure shock you even played along. still, she used it as an out from the devil with blonde locks, shrugging almost apologetically at owen before letting you whisk her away.

⋆˚✿˖° and that night, after everyone but you and abby had stumbled out of the cramped room, which was still humid and heavy, you made the plan. with a pen that had little ink left, scratching against the water damaged pages of the notebook you tucked under your pillow, you wrote the words “project get rid of owen moore.” which ok, in retrospect sounded really bad. but you were a little tipsy.

⋆˚✿˖° the plan was easy. play the role of abby’s first girlfriend, convince owen she was totally not into him or men anymore. what did you get out of it? a spot on the top dog abby anderson’s patrol team. something you had been vying for this year. abby agreed, although a little hesitantly. she promised she had picked you only because its who her pointed finger found first. not any actual attraction. you swallowed down the hit to your ego that brought.

⋆˚✿˖° and honestly? the plan went on pretty steadily. you were a damn good fake girlfriend if you had to admit it, and abby didn’t hate being around you. in fact, she really enjoyed being around you. she enjoyed how easily your fingers reached down, tapping on her palm to fing a way to hold her hand whenever one of owen’s posey was around. she enjoyed how you leaned in whenever owen passed by, your lips on her ear, whispering anything you knew would have her smiling. a fake smile of course.

⋆˚✿˖° you two had some pretty strict rules. no kissing, no extreme touchiness, absolutely no spilling to anyone this was fake, and the most important.. no real feelings. you had come up with a backstory, one you two had studied together. (you two met in the training room after your roommate introduced you two and totally hit it off. abby got you a spot on her team next to her and manny, and feeling bloomed from there.) abby added in a few details she knew would piss owen off.. and you sealed your lips shut to follow the rules.

⋆˚✿˖° the first few weeks were easy. you liked spending time around abby. you enjoyed how she smiled, you laughed at all the jokes she cracked (for the fake dating points of course..), and you loved training with her. you had to ignore the shiver her hands on your shoulders or waist gave, knowing it was just to help your position. “you have to fix your stance if you plan on fighting scars..” abby huffed.

⋆˚✿˖° the problem started in october. a month and a half into your fake dating plan. tens of lunches spent alone together, a handful of new hair styles you begged to try on abby, and around 5 missions out of the base, in. there was a party, one you demanded the two of you go to one day as you lounged on abby’s bunk— watching as she cleaned up manny’s mess across the room. “if we dress up together, owen will totally finally get off your case,” you assured, bringing a loud sigh from the blonde. “oh my god.. fine.”

⋆˚✿˖° you went as a angel and devil, simple enough to easy stitch together some devil horns for yourself and an angel halo you found in an old broken down store in the city for abby. no way did you admit the trouble you went for to find it to abs, especially not as she easily pulled her shirt off in front of you, totally clueing you in to where the nickname came from as she shoved on the white teeshirt.

⋆˚✿˖° see, the no kissing rule was an important one, but vodka made everything seem less important, and owen was awfully loud that night, scoffing any time you smiled and leaned into your angel, head band tilting off your head, which abby fixed with a grin. “you two act more like friends than people fucking each other,” owen scoffed as he pressed by you two, the words pounding in abby’s ears over the loud mingling voices.

⋆˚✿˖° “kiss me,” abby called over the old cd that played on the speakers, her cheeks red with anger— blue eyes flicking around. “what?” you laughed, thinking back to rule number 1. “i know we said no— no kissing but i just.. oh my god just kiss me,” abby muttered, her large hands gripping your cheeks and pulling you in for a kiss, one she was sure owen was watching on to. one you melted into, sucking her lip in between yours.

⋆˚✿˖° that had been a breaking point, ragged breaths and heated necks as you pulled away. it lead to more excuses with less validity being used when the two of you stared at each other’s lips. stepping down the stairs of the base, eyes catching on someone who just looked like owen. “kiss me,” abby muttered quickly, and you wasted no time to turn your head and fill your nose with the scent of pine as you leaned in.

⋆˚✿˖° the no kissing rule crossed off right before the no touchiness one did, that one had been scribbled off completely when abby began pulling you into her lap in group functions, one soft hand rubbing up against your side as she whispered in your ear, “jus’ for show.”

⋆˚✿˖° just for show of course, but you screamed into your pillow for so long that night you almost thought the walls of your room would crumble down along with the barrier you put between you and the blonde.

⋆˚✿˖° kisses and touchiness turned to nights spent in abby’s room, mornings waking up and having abby’s shirt thrown at your face. “wear that, owen got it for me when we were dating.” sure, you probably should be ashamed to be wearing the clothes of a girl who didn’t like you, but the frown on owen’s face made it worth it.

⋆˚✿˖° that last rule, the one that didn’t have pen strokes over the letters, the one locked behind awkward coughs and side glances, well you weren’t sure who broke it first. you dont know why feelings came into play, but you sure do know it happened.

⋆˚✿˖° you felt it first when abby didn’t talk to you for a few days. you saw her across the stadium with nora, her head tilted back lightly in a laugh at something the other girl said. that was the first time you felt the needle sized ache in your heart, one that only ripped further when owen shoulder checked you on his way by, “better get your girl. she slips away easily.”

⋆˚✿˖° maybe that rule had been broken when abby stormed into your room, met with the sight of you on the couch with some other blonde girl, an old tape of a southern movie mid way through when anderson scoffed and demanded the girl get out. she did so in a hurry, scrambling for her sweatshirt as a frown grew on your lips. “abby what the fuck?” you scoff, watching her eyebrows unfurrow lightly. “you can’t have other girls over! it fucks with our plan,” she accused, though she stumbled lightly over the words. “she’s just a friend, abby.”

⋆˚✿˖° however, the night you sat in your bed, breath heavy and eyes stinging as you broke through the paper with the pen, scratching over the words “no real feelings,” that came in the end of november.

⋆˚✿˖° your head was pressed into abby’s shoulder, yawning and closing your eyes as the movie played on a big sheet, a biweekly occurrence in the WLF base. abby had pressed to your cheek, placing a kiss to it that had some sort of butterfly attack take fruition in your stomach. you two didn’t even know if owen or his friends were around, and they for sure were not the reason of abby’s hand linking into yours as you two walked toward her room later that night. you both seemed to realize that when you reached her door and she leaned forward just lightly, as if to kiss you.

⋆˚✿˖° she cleared her throat, licking over the lips you wanted to capture again. “i think-” she said suddenly, squeezing her eyes closed. “i think owen really believes it now.” you could feel your heart sinking to the empty stomach that laid below your chest, knowing what came next. “i think we should break up.” abby finished, quick to add, “fake break up.”

⋆˚✿˖° you nodded along silently to the story she built still standing in her doorway. miscommunication, arguments, differing plans, the whole shebang— anything to make the breakup believable. you agreed, but the moment her door shut, a half smile and thank you sitting on her lips as the door locked, you felt the tears prick your eyes.

⋆˚✿˖° you wiped quickly at the tears, your hand slapped over the aching chest you swore betrayed you. you sucked in shallow breaths, shaky hands finding your own door as your vision went blurry.

⋆˚✿˖° as your pen broke through the white sheet of paper, you cursed your own heart. you cursed it for being so easy to rip from your chest, presented on a platter for a blonde who only saw it as a fake replica. you threw the notebook across the floor, hand slapping over your mouth so your roommate wouldn’t wake as you sobbed into it. surely you had been the only one to break that rule, but that didn’t matter now.

⋆˚✿˖° but you were wrong. not that you could know that. a five minute walk away, abby breathed out slowly as her fingers scraped though the braid she was undoing, an odd stinging pricked at the corner of her lashes. she knew she did the right thing. she knew it as soon as her lips searched for your own at her doorway tonight. so why did it feel so bad? why did her hands tremble as she pulled out her blanket and climbed under it, squeezing her eyes shut.

⋆˚✿˖° if this was all fake, why did the break up feel so real?

#rins reqs ❀.#abby anderson #abby anderson x reader #abby anderson x you #abby anderson x y/n #abby anderson x fem reader #abby anderson x f!reader #abby anderson fic #abby anderson fanfic #abby anderson fluff

1K notes · View notes

atinysunbaby · 5 months

Text

@ateezluvv asked :

heyyy...could you please make ateez having crush on you? aaaand you are songwriter at KQ too....thank uuuuuu

Thank you for asking! I hope you'll like it even though I didn't make it the exact way you wanted and it took me an eternity to write, really sorry about that. :(. I wrote a different job for each member, because I felt it might be more entertaining that way. <3

⌛Ateez Hyung line having a crush on you⌛

💖Park Seonghwa💖

"Park Seonghwa." You call your next patient's name, standing while holding the door separating the offices and the waiting room. You analyze his every actions and movements, like the boy's eyes widening slightly at the sound of your voice, the pathetic non subtle attempt at taking a shaky breath in hopes to slow his sudden rapid heartbeat, his hands and legs trembling as he stands up and the corner of his lips he can't seem to control that are starting to form a smile.

"Hello Dr. L/N!" You nod with a smile and gesture for him to follow as usual, scoffing under your breath in amusement, the excitement you could hear in those 3 words and the higher tone of voice he used, added to his reddening cheeks and averting eyes, this man really can't keep his emotions from showing.

You position yourself at the entrance of your office, gesturing for Seonghwa to enter. "Please take a seat and we'll get started."

The boy obeys immediately, maybe a bit too fast in your perspective, but letting this slide as well, you sit behind your desk and proceed to ask him a few personal questions. "So tell me Mr. Park, what is the reason of your urgency?"

"My what?" He asks, his voice almost a whisper and wearing a confused expression, waiting for your possible explanation. "Yes, you called my secretary and asked to get the closest appointment disponible.. or was that not the case?"

"No- I mean yes.. It's because of headaches, I get them everyday and I can't focus on practice anymore when it gets to intense." He lets out frustrated, clearly it has been affecting him for a while. "Any other symptoms?"

"Umm- no, I don't think so." You nod and type a few informations in your computer. While being occupied, you can still see the way the boy bounces his legs in nervousness and the way he can't seem to loosen up. "Are you sleeping enough, eating well, hydrating?"

"Well, sometimes?" At that, you give him back your full attention, concerned about his wellbeing. "Sometimes? What is sometimes? How many hours of sleep do you generally get, do you eat all of your meals and what kind of food, how many glass of water per day?"

"I'd say.. 4 hours per nights, sometimes more or less. I drink whenever I can, which I believe is not enough and every time I eat I feel sick, so I eat one meal, sometimes 2 and it's mostly ordered." You know he's an idol and you came to the conclusion that he was working really hard and it must be complicated, but you had no idea it was that bad. "Alright, you'll have to get a blood test and when I'll receive the results I will immediately send you a prescription for the supplements you need. I believe you are malnourished and you lack a whole lot of sleep."

He nods and sighs, feeling a bit helpless at his situation, it's almost impossible to stay completely healthy when there's a comeback and on top of that the group received death treats.

"You must know this already but, you really need to eat all of your meals and try to eat healthily, you need to sleep to regenerate your body and drink more water in order to function better. You might only be experiencing headaches now, but if this keeps on going at long term, there could be a lot of negative repercussions."

"I will, thanks miss!" He says with a blush coating his cheeks, slowly coming to realisation of the word he used. "You don't have to call me miss you know? Y/N will be just fine, if that's alright with you of course."

"No no no- I mean yes of course! It's totally fine- sorry.." He abruptly shuts his mouth because of the amused look you give him, never having felt more embarrassed in his life. "No worries Seonghwa, just make sure to keep this a secret between the two of us, I'm not supposed to get so 'friendly' with a patient and my colleagues wouldn't appreciate that I'm being so unprofessional."

All you receive is a flustered nod from the other and the sight infront of you is priceless. Seonghwa looks breathless and his whole face, neck and ears seems to have turned red, his lips are restrained by his teeth and it looks like they are about to rip from the pressure, in short, the boy looks like he is about to burst. "Seonghwa."

"Mmh?" He looks at you dumbly, as if his brain had just stopped working and he turned stupid. You scoff in disbelief, but mostly because you find him adorable for behaving like you are some kind of goddess. "You can breathe sweetheart."

And with that his whole chest deflates, as he lets out the breath he was holding.

💙Kim Hongjoong💙

Being a teacher always has been your dream job, and for the last few months that dream became a reality, but you wonder now if you might have made a mistake.

Everything that comes with teaching, other than educating people on your favorite subject, is actual crap. Even though you have considered unimaginable scenarios while trying to prepare yourself to this world, it is nothing like what you imagined.

You wanted to quit after weeks of feeling absolutely miserable, but something-no, someone held you back. Hongjoong. That cute boy in one of your class who always pays attention and participates as much as humanly possible.

While the others always treat you like shit, being disrespectful and making disgusting comments that affect you more than you thought they would, Hongjoong stands up for you. He shuts them up real quick which you think is really sweet, but he's your student and it can be nothing more than that. Your delusional self will need to forget about that perfect man and move on.

"Alright guys remember about what we covered for the last two weeks, most of it will be in the exam. Have a good day!" Your students, although disrespectful most of time, salute you on their way out when they feel like being polite, which in your opinion is somewhat even worst. Because you know they know that they make you feel worthless, but they only care about themselves and their image.

"Excuse me miss?" There it is again, that smooth, angelic, soothing and irresistible voice calling for you. Trying to calm the untamable beating of your heart and put on the mask of a teacher who's totally not head over heals for her student, you answer the boy with a charming but neutral nevertheless tone of voice. "Yes Hongjoong what is it?"

"Could I speak to you for a second.. like privately?" He adds the last two words in reason of the numerous students walking around the corridor, you also don't fail to notice him looking quite uncomfortable and proceed to leave the door ajar, to not cause any misunderstanding..

"I just have a certain, uhh.. I need to tell you.. something." He fidgets endlessly which makes you even more nervous, but you remain calm as your 'student' needs you. "Of course what is it, you can tell me anything."

"I.. just kind of like you, like a lot." He throws the confession at you and acts like he's the one in shock, gasping with his eyes full of what resemble fear and hands coming up to hide his gapping mouth. You on the other side, stop breathing completely. "W-what?"

Then you know it wasn't the reaction he was hoping for, because panic settles in his already overwhelmed with emotions' body and mind. "Oh no- please I'm sorry! Could you please maybe forget I ever said that? I don't- it was a lie! Yes I lied-"

"Oh my- you did nothing wrong, no need to panic, just take a deep breath babyboy. " At the beginning of your sentence, you watched as his body relaxed and he started to regain control of himself, but after that you lost the poor boy. "B-babyboy?"

You didn't mean to call him that, but you don't regret it after seeing his reaction. You try to hide your laugh behind a cough, but he catches it quickly. "Are you laughing at me? Was that a joke?"

He looks so heartbroken that it sends a sharp pain through yours, an adorable pout makes its way onto his face without his knowledge, small unshed tears gather at the corner of his eyes and his eyebrows furrow in sadness, making his forehead slightly scrunch up. The poor baby looks way too cute when he's sad, and you shouldn't think so. "No don't cry, it wasn't a joke! I didn't mean for it to slip out like that, but if you don't dislike the nickname..."

"Really?" You have to stop yourself with everything you have right now, to not hug the life out of this precious little human. Fortunately, it seems that luck is on your side today, and the boy is the one reaching out for you. "Umm, would it be ok if I hugged you?"

"Come here." And of course you can't resist, squeezing the boy in your arms in a tight hug and he melts against you, his hands gripping the back of your shirt in fear you'll let go.

💛Jeong Yunho💛

"Hello! Is anyone here?" You hear a deep, masculine voice call out for someone and you hurry to put the tiny kitten your holding in its cage with her siblings. "Yes I'm coming, just a second!"

"Oh there's no need to rush, please take your time." The man kindly responds and you smile at the gentleness in his tone, hurrying your task despite not having to. You don't want to make the boy wait when you have the time for him immediately.

You enter the main entrance with hurry and enthusiasm for a potential new customer, more then ready to greet the person waiting in the room, but your usual joyful speech is cut short when you are met with who you think, is the most handsome man you ever saw. "Welcome to the shelter... Umm I'm Y/N, how can I help you sir."

You gulp unintentionally, all of the confidence you usually have for other animal lovers like you is thrown out of the window from the moment your eyes meets. His smile is as bright as the sun and you swear you can see twinkles in his beautiful brown eyes, his aura gives off positivity and pure happiness and it makes you smile unknowingly. "Hi I'm Yunho, I'm looking to adopt a dog."

"Oh right- of course, we have a few little treasures at the moment! Would you like to meet them?" You ask in hopes that he would agree and end up taking one of the unfortunate pups currently residing in cages after being abandoned. "Yes! I'd love too."

Your heart flutters at the sight of his beauty and sincerity, showing off all of his perfect white teeth, eyes squinting slightly, giving him such a cute appearance. "You can follow me! I'm sure they'll be really excited to spend some time with you."

"I'm excited too. I've thought about this for a long time and I already bought everything necessary, bed, food bowls, toys, food, treats, blanket and- maybe a little too much actually." Yeah, excitement is clear in his tone and you can't fight the grin from appearing on your face. "I'm really glad to hear that. A lot of people who come to adopt some of our animals don't seem to care much."

"Really? Who wouldn't be looking forward to this? I mean especially if they come here in the first place." You're shocked for a second, the more he speaks and the more you are pleased by his kindness. He seems like a gentle and caring person, exactly the type of person a pet needs. "Right! That's what I thought, they don't deserve to adopt one of them if they act like that."

You turn to him slightly while opening the door to the dogs' room, both exchanging an interesting glance and you blush slightly at the way he carefully watches you. You wonder if he has been looking at during your whole small conversation and if he did, you hope you didn't do anything embarrassing. "We're here."

Your voice his small and you silently curse yourself for appearing so shy and nervous in front of someone you just met. You proceed to open the first cage, letting the 1 year old corgi out and introducing him to Yunho. " This is Pudding, he's a pretty active little guy, cuddly and he listens well to the instructions he's given. On the day he was brought here, he whined and didn't wanna come out of his cage for days after, he was so sad. Poor baby."

"I can't imagine abandoning a small being like that, they must go through so much pain." The pained expression he wears now, confirms his thoughts and you try to brighten the mood up a bit. "Fortunately, there are some amazing people who come here to save them."

Yunho giggles, knowing the intentions behind your words and appreciating your efforts to make his visit as pleasant as possible. "Well, there's also the kind and beautiful girl who takes care of them during their stay."

Your mouth hangs open in surprise, heat rising to your cheeks and you can't help but hide your face behind your hand in hopes that your heart will slow down. Yunho chuckles and the sound sends shivers through your whole body, he keeps getting more and more attractive and you don't know how to act anymore. "W-would you like to meet Rocky now?"

"Mmh I don't know, I think Pudding and I are already inseparable." He pets the dog who has fallen asleep in his laps and you can't help but let out a small laugh, happy for the puppy to have found his new family. "Really?"

"Yup, he's my little buddy now, if that's alright of course." He scratches behind the animal's ear and looks at him dearly, you know at that moment that Yunho is perfect for Pudding. He's going to be loved and cared for like never before and you just have a feeling that he will never be sad again. "Thank you, I'm really happy for you both. All that's left is some paperwork to fill and you'll be able to take Pudding home."

You both make your way out and back into the lobby, Yunho holds the still sleeping dog in his arms and walks carefully not to wake him. You take out a small folder with a few pages document he has to fill and you wait patiently while he writes down the informations needed.

"All done!" He exclaims, keeping his voice low so he doesn't startle the small baby asleep against him, he grins at you but it disappears almost instantly, a nervous expression replacing it instead. "Will I see you again?"

"You mean here at the shelter?" You ask hoping that he wants to see you for another reason than regarding his newfound friend, you don't want to sound like a fool if you answer his question after reading his intentions wrong. He laughs, this time it's so quiet and breathy that you almost don't catch it. "No, I mean... Can I have your number or something? I want to see you again, like to get to know you- if you want to of course, if you don't, I'll respect your decision."

You hesitate, only for a second, not because you don't want to, you would without even having to think about it, but you're at work and you shouldn't be fraternizing with a client. You quickly decide that it's worth giving it a shot and if you get in trouble, you'll deal with it then. You write your number on top of the folder containing Pudding's birth certificate and other important papers and hand it to him, feeling giddy and nervous. "I'd want that too."

You both exchange one last smile and Yunho leaves with the promise of contacting you as soon as he can. You're already looking forward to seeing him again. "See you Y/N!"

💜Kang Yeosang💜

You were working as a staff member at KQ, mostly assisting everyone you could with their jobs and making their lives just a bit easier. When they found out that you have a degree in kinesiology and worked at a gym for some time, they proposed that you become a personal trainer to some of the members.

One of them being Kang Yeosang, the prettiest human you've ever laid eyes on, ateez's precious and sweet baby who is loved and recognize for his cuteness, is groaning and huffing as he works out only a few meters away from you.

You make eye contact every once in a while through the mirror and you try to make it look like you weren't just checking him out, clearing your throat and nodding before taking some notes on your pad, but deep down you know he must be aware. "I think if you move your arms a bit more sideways it'll be safer. Wouldn't want you to strain a muscle."

"Like this?" He proceeds to do as instructed and you nod with a smile, letting him continue on his own. Truth be told, Yeosang doesn't really need a trainer, but he insisted that you at least stay and watch him so you can take notes on the mistakes and help him improve.

You should keep it professional and not make him uncomfortable, but everytime he goes back to his exercises, you can swear you can see a smirk appear on his face. As if he is teasing you and enjoying your reactions, it's only adding fuel to the creeping fire in your stomach.

His muscles are bulging, almost threatening to rip his shirt with how tight it became since he started an hour ago, a big proof of his efforts. The veins on his arms and hands, a result from all the weight lifting and it's attracting your eyes like a magnet. The sweat coating his skin and making his hair stick to his forehead doesn't make him look bad in the slightest, actually it's the first time that you aren't disgusted by someone else's sweaty figure and you can't help the way your body responds to the man, who is now walking towards your smaller form and towering over you.

You don't know if you were right to agree and take the job, because in this very moment, having to be so close to him is leaving you breathless and you're scared you'll end up reacting in a way that'll make him hate you. He's searching for your eyes, trying to get your attention, but you're so deeply lost in your thoughts that you almost gasp at the feeling of his fingers on your chin. He lifts your head so you meet his gaze and arches one of his eyebrows in what you think is a mix of amusement and interest. "So did you enjoy the show?"

"W-what- are you- you're.. I. I didn't!" You can barely breathe as his overpowering aura engulfs you and it overwhelms you to the point you can't form a whole sentence. His reaction to your response is what makes you break and you try to get away from his grasp, but he only grabs you face more forcefully this time and backs you against the wall behind, almost pressing his whole body against yours. "Now I didn't take you for liar little one."

You accept your fate, his eyes boring into yours and he looks like he's about to devour you. His expression changes from lust to concern in a matter of seconds when you start to tear up, maybe from embarrassment or because everything is too much at the same time, you have no idea. "Are you ok, do you want me to stop?"

You shake your head, but a tear falls followed by your lower lip starting to tremble. Yeosang takes it as a clue to stop even though you say otherwise. He slowly releases your jaw and backs away only enough to give you some space. "Did I hurt you or scare you?"

You reassure him by shaking your head once more, reaching for his hand without realising, only to stop mid air when you do. He notices immediately and smiles sweetly at you, bending to your height slightly before he takes you in his arms, holding you close to his body. "You can touch me if you want, it's ok sweet baby."

"Now do you wanna tell me why you were crying mmh?" He asks gently, not to make you cry again and you try to regain some control over your body, taking a deep breath and thanking Yeosang for being so patient and understanding. "I.. don't know, just felt, like too much."

Hearing your words Yeosang is in dilemma, between squishing you to death from finding you so adorable or kissing you till you can't breathe anymore, but since he doesn't want to overwhelm you again he opts for a more self restrained option. "Can I kiss you?"

You barely have time to nod before his lips are on yours, the gentleness in his touch makes you relax against his chest in less then a few seconds. Your hands reaching up to tug the hair at the back of his nape which results in a deep moan coming out of his throat and you shiver at the sound. Just before it escalates, he slowly parts from you and you both can't help but smile. He pecks your lips a few times before confessing. "You don't know for how long I've been wanting to kiss you."

Maknae line

309 notes · View notes

lo1k-diamonds · 4 months

Text

SX Seoul Series | Jungkook Entry 💜 Bubbles (Part 2)

PAIRING: Jungkook/Reader (You can also read it on AO3)

SUMMARY: You wake up the next morning and feelings you didn't want to stir are brought back to the surface. You think he might feel the same way but maybe you jumped to conclusions too soon.

WORD COUNT: 8.3k

GENRE: Exes to lovers, smuuuuuut, angst, making up

RATING: Explicit

WARNINGS: exes, explicit, unprotected sex (stay safe!), you guys fight and stuff gets punched and thrown around, lingering feelings, heartbreak, second chances

PARTS: [1] [2]

A.N. I wrote this story after a while of being unable to focus and write so I hope you enjoy it, I think it turned out fun :)

----

You woke up in the morning, yet despite the sun’s rays hitting the floor, you couldn't be certain. Were you truly waking up?

You sighed and pressed yourself further back into a welcoming chest. The sheets had a familiar scent, and this along with the tattooed arm enveloping you and the breath fanning your hair made you sure that you were still dreaming. You moved ever so slightly, you wanted to submerge deeper into that dream, and his legs tangled with yours even better as if to tell you you were not going anywhere. It melted you because it reminded you of so many mornings before. So many dawns and sunsets where you’d be tucked in safely inside those arms, with his hum near your ear, his perfume trickling your nose, and you took deep breaths. That was your safety net, the place you rushed to so you could recover, rest, and gain the courage to face the world.

It was enough for you to search for even more. You were sleepy, dreaming, and on the only fluffy cloud in the sky where you wanted to be. So you turned under his arm to face him and your heart instantly trembled. His eyes were closed, but the soft lines of his face were the sweetest thing you had ever seen. You missed those pouty lips, that round cutesy nose, and the swell of those cheeks you used to tease all the time and that made you fall in love whenever delicate dimples would crease. His eyebrows had always been so expressive and now one had a piercing, which didn’t match the two rings adorning his lower lip except that he pierced the same side of his face. But even that didn’t surprise you; when you first met, he said he always wanted to do something, but didn’t know exactly what. You guessed he had figured it out.

You reached to brush his hair aside and felt the two studs on his eyebrow with a feather-like touch — you liked it. You liked everything about him, always had. You knew then your heart was getting loud and you smirked when it became deafening — because he opened his eyes. And in that moment, you decided that reality would only come knocking if you let it. You could pretend it didn’t exist. You could pretend Jungkook was still yours, that he didn’t hate you, that you belonged in his arms again.

You leaned in to nuzzle him and gave him a moment to move away. You were clear — you wanted to go on that ride again and forget everything else, but what about him?

He brushed his nose to yours once and captured your lips with a kiss that fluttered your heart. It wasn’t desperate or crude, it was gentle and warm like when two lovers said good morning. And that was all you needed.

You snuggled closer, embracing him and stretching and sighing in multiple turns. He returned your kiss and held you close, equally invested in that moment with you, away from any pain, anger, or subterfuge. This made you smile, contentment radiating from every corner of you, and it was as if you were in an alternate dimension. You could feel his love again and adore him back and you wanted to make the best of it.

Maybe it seemed against your better judgment, but you broke your kiss with a mischievous smile and turned your back on him. You pulled his arm firmer around you, in case he had silly ideas, and rubbed your ass on his crotch for good measure. The Jungkook you knew didn’t need any explanations or instructions, and indeed, he grabbed you close, grinding his hardening dick on your ass while breathing in the scent of your skin.

His hand came to cup your breast gently and you grinned, feeling elated with the way he was all over you. When he started playing with your nipple to harden it, you bit your lower lip and failed to contain your whimpers. He knew you were sensitive but it never stopped him before.

He started biting and licking down your neck and you were covered in goosebumps, arching your back to give him better access. He kept his sweet torture, but that wasn’t enough for you — you reached between your legs to grab his hard cock behind you and pull it to be squished between your thighs when you closed them. Then you rocked your hips and melted at the groan behind you.

“That’s it,” you cooed in a whisper, clenching around nothing in anticipation. “You’re so hard for me.”

You knew he loved to be coaxed, the same way you loved to tell him how good he felt. He wasn’t stopping, nibbling down your skin and pinching your nipple gently as he rutted you and you bit your lip.

“And I’m so ready for you,” you sighed. “Wont you check?”

Your tone was needy but you never bothered hiding it. His hand travelled from your chest to your core and instantly felt how you were dripping from your folds.

You whimpered, “See how you slide so well?” You meant at the surface, but his fingers sank into your flesh, pumping wet sounds out of you along with needy moans. “Fuck— You know where to go. You’ll feel so good, I promise.”

You felt his smile on your skin as he busied himself pumping you with two digits and getting juicy noises out of you. You moaned onto the pillow, rocking your hips to feel him better both inside you and in between your legs. You loved those sensations, not just the pleasure, but the scent reaching your nose because you were in his bed. You were living a dream and it was absolutely perfect.

His hand grabbed your hip, knowing well you were leaning forward and tilting your ass so he’d eventually slip inside you. The way he was making you crazy for it didn’t elude you, but you were never beyond begging.

“Fuck, baby. Please let me have you, please.”

He froze and you squirmed to feel him, thinking that was him just making you work harder for him.

He moved quickly enough that you didn’t think beyond it — he reached behind him inside a nightstand drawer and got something. You heard the wrap tearing and waited until he was ready. You didn’t let a single thought cross your mind, not now.

He grabbed your hip again and this time his cock pushed between your folds to get inside you, making you moan and lose all strength. He rocked his hips into yours and you gasped, leaning back. You didn’t expect him to grab your hair and arch you further, but you definitely tensed more around him, barely able to catch your breath.

“Fuck— Fuck, I love it when you do this.”

You could feel his breath down your neck. “Yeah? Love it whenever a guy fucks you like this?”

“No, only you.” Your reply was as natural as breathing, giving him all you had. “Always only you.” You were burning inside out, feeling flush not only on your cheeks but also on your chest, hands, and stomach. You reached to grip his arm supporting your hip in place; you were starting to get sweaty but you doubted he minded. You were just looking for more ways to connect with him. “Are you going to tease me? Make me a good girl for you? I always loved to be good so I could earn you filling me up completely.”

His hips jerked off tempo and you only sighed. He remembered for sure what you were talking about.

His fingers dug at your skin, “Yeah? How many times have you begged for a guy’s cum after that?”

“Never. You’re the only one I ever begged to, the only cum I ever wanted. The only raw cock inside me, the only—”

He stopped and pushed you by the shoulder to face him. You were a bit startled but faced him with all the vulnerability you had been showing so far. His eyes were glistening, almost hurt, and your breath shook. You didn’t want that reality, the one in which you hurt him. You wanted to be back a year before when everything was good and sweet.

His eyes were watering up and he looked down. You thought he was running away from you and you were desperate for him to stay, and you looked down too. Before you could speak, you noticed he had his hand around the base of his cock, just frozen like that.

You teared up, “Do it.”

He looked up at you and you saw tears in his eyes as well.

You smiled, “I never had anyone other than you raw. If you want to, I’d love to feel you again.”

He didn’t even blink. You were certain it was an impulse as you saw him pull the condom out and guide himself inside you as if he were a dying man and your core was his salvation. But as you both groaned and closed your eyes with the feeling of being connected again, you couldn’t care. You looked at him with a tear sliding down your face into the pillow and knew that it would all just break your heart in the end.

He must have known it too, because his eyes were glistening and red as he thrust into you at a slower pace. You instantly wanted to beg, but he gripped you closer, jerking his hips into you in a hard yet loving way that melted you to the bone.

“Fuck,” you dragged, trying to look up so you could see him above your legs still bent to the side like when you were spooning. You could feel him all over you again, inside and out in ways that felt like your souls were merging and it had you enter that beautiful reverie. You gripped his arm harder and forced his hand on your chest to squeeze as you moved with him. “Don’t stop. Please, please, please,” you said with every moan, scared that he would pull away and leave you. “Only you feel like this, please.”

“Only me?”

He was breathless, you almost didn’t hear him over your prayers. “Only you,” you confirmed, then you trembled and the words dripped out of your mouth. “I’ve missed you so much. So much,” your voice smothered with anxiety, with the tears flowing from your eyes that you squinted shut.

You didn’t fear that he would reject you or mock you or ignore you, you weren’t thinking. Your heart was hurting and you couldn’t keep it in anymore.

He slowed down and you hid your face under your hands, immediately wanting to ask him not to stop when you felt his breath near your ear.

“Me too. I’ve missed you too, bubbles.” His voice was wavering as he reached to kiss every inch of skin in range, soon after releasing his hand from your grasp only to grab it back and bring it to his lips. “I’ve missed everything. I’ve missed this.”

A sob almost silenced you, but you managed to call for him first, “Kook.”

It was a desperate sound you were almost ashamed to let out, so your hands instantly covered your face again.

He stopped and in a second was pulling your leg under him so he could get on top of you in between your legs and hold you tightly. He leaned down to kiss your hands away as his hips rocked into you gently.

His lips and calls convinced you to uncover your face only to wrap your arms around him and hide in his neck, “I miss you!” You whispered with a lump in your throat. “Please.”

He kissed your red and wet cheeks, down to the salty traces that led into your hairline, “I miss you too.”

Shivers ran down your body as his words emerged a knot of feelings from inside your chest. You were never able to face it, to deal with it, to forgive him or yourself, but his words. The way he was with you, holding you close just like he used to when he loved you. His body was fully connected to yours, maybe even his soul.

You sank your nails onto his back and focused on his weight on you, his soft skin, his scent, and the burning tension in your lower stomach. You knew you would explode soon but you needed to let it out.

“I wanted to see you.”

He kissed your head, “I’m here.”

“I needed to see you,” you tried, but the pleasure sparking inside you was about to steal that chance. So you hugged him closer — a moan was pushed out of you and you could feel your orgasm starting, but you still chirped, “I love—”

You couldn’t finish as you started shaking uncontrollably from the waves of pleasure tensing and relaxing every muscle in your body. You clung on to him, squeezing him so tightly you were surprised he didn’t didn’t break apart. But maybe he didn’t for the same reason as you — he was holding you together.

He waited for you to be done before pulling out and coming over your belly. He didn’t bother separating your bodies and just groaned near your ear as you hugged him close. You could feel the warm substance trickling down the sides of your stomach but you didn’t care. You were never one to be bothered, you were not disgusted by him in the slightest.

He kissed your head and you smiled, waiting and longing for his kiss to travel to your cheeks, then further to your mouth. You tried to control your happiness and kiss him back placatingly, still letting that joy reach corners of you that were dim otherwise.

When he pulled away, you had no idea what would happen, but you were at ease. Because you opened up to him and he missed you back, and even though you weren’t able to tell him properly that you still loved him, you’d surely have another opportunity soon.

That was what you thought and the reason your lips were curved, even when he got away from you to grab wipes so he could clean you. Yet as he did, you noticed he wasn’t looking at you. His jaw was hardening and he didn’t look nearly half as relaxed as you did.

Shit.

He wasn’t done yet when you tried to reach for his hand, but he dodged you and threw the wipe away before putting his legs out of the bed to sit with his back to you. You started shaking.

“Not to ruin your post-nut clarity, but I’d like to talk.”

You chuckled nervously and fumbled with the sheet — everything you said felt risky, and every step you took felt like the ice under you would crack. You feared speaking too soon but couldn’t risk doing it too late. You let those fears drown you once, but not again. At least this time your mistake would be insisting, not letting it slide.

“Nothing to talk about.”

You knew from his tone that he was about to push you away and it made you react. “That’s not true. I said I miss you, and you said it back.”

He didn’t answer; all you could see were his wide shoulders as he leaned forward, supported on his knees, and kept quiet.

You gave him the chance to speak his mind because maybe he needed time and who knew, maybe you did too. But you couldn’t think as you waited, you had no idea what to say. Nothing felt enough, but you wanted to say everything.

He heaved a deep breath and moved a millimeter to get up, and you immediately pushed. “Answer me. Talk to me. Why can’t we have a conversation?”

He scoffed, “That’s rich coming from you.”

You sat up as he got up and searched for clothes in a nearby closet. “It goes both ways.”

You bit your tongue and cursed yourself for reacting instead of thinking first — you didn’t want to fight, you wanted to talk.

You took a deep breath and spoke while he put a pair of boxers on, “Do you miss me?”

He scoffed and left the room and you jumped off the bed after him. You could only grab the nearest tee shirt you saw, black as everything else he owned, and scurried after him.

“Answer me,” you insisted, seeing him in the living room putting pants on. Where did those even come from? “Fucking hell, Jungkook, just answer me!”

“What?!” He exploded, anger brazen on his features, but you didn’t step back.

“Do you really miss me?”

“No.”

You raised your chin and tried to not give away how your heart was cracking further. You couldn’t think or you’d start crying. “Well, fuck you too.” Your voice still wavered, “Don’t fucking lie next time.”

You turned to reach the bathroom and get your clothes so you could leave. Your heart was pulsating with sharp pain and you knew you were seconds away from crying. You needed to get out. Now.

“You’re assuming I—”

“Yeah yeah, no seconds,” you spat bitterly, unsure if he heard you. He shut up, so he did. You grabbed your clothes, “You don’t have to worry about that.”

A sudden noise from behind you startled you so before you could strip, you turned around — he had kicked the bathroom door with so much strength you thought it might have popped off.

“What the fuck do you want from me?!”

“How many times do I have to say it? A fucking conversation!”

“I have nothing to say to you!”

“Fine! You’ll lie anyway!”

You turned your back to him, letting the poisonous anger burn your guts while you got a hang of your dress so you could put it on.

When a loud noise came from the door again, you weren’t even surprised. This time, he punched it and something metal hopped over the floor and rolled away.

“As if you didn’t say those things in the spur of the moment!”

“I didn’t.” Tears ran down your face and you cleaned them quickly, refusing to let the cry take over you. “I meant every word I said.”

“Bullshit,” his voice had so much contempt you almost broke down.

“I don’t care what you believe,” was all you said, then took the tee off. “Just because you lied doesn’t mean I did.”

He saw how your back bent and tensed while you put your strapless bra on. He was shaking in anger but he heard you sniffle and you didn’t sound like you were mocking him. He couldn’t handle it if it was true.

“Don’t joke around—”

“I’m not fucking joking.” You sounded angry now and you grabbed your dress to put it on. He clenched his fists. “But it doesn’t matter, it’s done.”

You put your strapless dress back on, adjusting it so it would cover you as much as possible. You had no way of seeing how angry he was getting at the sight of you wearing that again instead of his clothes, but it was something he would never admit.

“You want me to believe you wanted to see me?”

His voice was derisive and you turned to him. “I did.”

“That you needed to see me?”

He scoffed and you grabbed your heels on the floor. “I did.”

You turned back to him, thinking that maybe now you could actually talk, but he was shaking his head. You saw tears in his eyes before he started laughing and rubbing his face.

“It’s funny, is it?” You asked, filled with contempt yourself. “Why, you didn’t even hit the punchline yet.”

He uncovered his face and his whole expression was a warning.

“What?” You asked, crossing your arms over your chest. “If you’re going to mock me then at least do it well.”

His jawline was tensing again but you couldn’t care anymore.

“Come on, where’s the final question? You heard me. You would be running your mouth if you didn’t.” You scoffed, “Though I couldn’t really say it properly, but—”

“You don’t know what you’re saying.”

For a second you thought he was scared, but you only smirked, “I don’t? You know what? You’re right. Congratulations, you’re right about something and all you had to do was be an asshole.” You stepped towards him to get out but he didn’t move out of the way. “Let me go.”

He shook his head and you ignored all kinds of emotions on his face.

You pushed him, but he didn’t move. “Let me go.”

“No.”

You pushed his shoulders again, but he didn’t budge. You clenched your jaw, upset, and saw that it didn’t bother him in the slightest. In fact, maybe he liked it. You pushed him once more and he tried grabbing your arms, and you struggled.

He won — he grabbed your forearms, “What did you say?” You scoffed and he pulled you closer. “Tell me what was I supposed to have heard?”

“I said I—”

You were ready to spit it in his face but your throat blocked as you looked into his eyes. You were both angry and hurt, and you thought you were above it, but you weren’t. If you said it again, it would hurt infinitely more. But then it hit you — he just used you. He was attracted to you and wanted an easy fuck, and that was what that night was. You were hung up on him like a moron.

Your eyes teared up but you made a decision — it would be easier if he just crushed your heart right now.

“I said I love you.”

He released his hold on you instantly as if you burned and you scoffed. You guessed you did — this Jungkook in front of you clearly couldn’t handle something like that. He was a fuckboy now.

You pushed him again and he didn’t resist, falling to the side and letting you pass. You started looking around — you couldn’t recall where you had thrown your purse.

“I said don’t joke around.”

His voice was barely above a whisper and you didn’t stop. You were throwing sofa pillows around, “And I said I’m not joking. And I don’t lie either, contrary to you.”

“You have no idea what you’re saying.”

You pulled your hair back with a sigh; it wasn’t on the couch. “You’re starting to sound like a broken record.” You continued looking around, maybe in the kitchen? “What does it matter anyway? I get it — why you lied. I was being emotional and you wanted an easy fuck.” You huffed; not there either. “You got it, so you want me to leave now, right? Don’t worry, I want to, I just can’t find—”

He roared and punched something that made the coat hanger fall to the floor. “You talk and talk and talk but you still don’t know what you’re fucking saying!”

You got over your shock quickly and threw your shoes on the floor, “It would help if you fucking talked instead of breaking the place!”

“I can’t fucking talk when you’re driving me insane!”

You scoffed, “Me? Maybe you are just insane.”

He stepped to you with a dangerous look, “Watch your mouth.”

“Why? What will you do?” You rolled your eyes when he only took a deep breath in response. When you looked back at him he was closer and you instantly tensed up, and not in a bad way. He was eying you in that way that had you crazy needy but you stood your ground. “You’re not touching me again.” Your lips pulled in contempt, “Not like you want to. No sloppy seconds, right? So surely no thirds or fourths or—”

He stepped forward, ready to grab you, and you gave him your most disgusted piercing look.

“Don’t touch me. Don’t look at me, don’t even think about using me again.”

You were out of breath, spitting venomous words while your eyes were locked, but in an instant, something wet dripped down your cheeks. You breathed, and instantly you recognized the pain searing your heart. It hurt. It hurt too much.

Your sob had you sucking breaths anxiously and you gave him your back. You didn’t want him to see how much it hurt you.

“I’d never use you.”

“Then why am I here?”

“Because—” He heaved a deep breath. It was complicated and he was so conflicted he wanted to punch something again. But seeing your shoulders move as you contained your sobs, his mind cleared. “Because I wanted to be with you.”

“Right,” you chuckled despite the tears. “Wasn’t fucking in a dark alley enough? Why did you bring me here?”

“To be with you.”

“Say it properly. To fuck.” He didn’t answer and you sucked in a deep breath, “Or maybe… maybe something worse. Not just to use me, did you want to hurt me? Is this some sort of… vengeance or—?”

“No!” He raised his arms to your shoulders but he didn’t touch you. You didn’t want him to.

You grinned but it was painful, “Lying again? Fuck, I never knew you like this.”

“I’m not lying.”

“Bullshit,” you almost laughed despite your crying and sniffling.

“It’s the truth.”

“Why should I believe you?”

He gritted his teeth behind you and gripped his hair in frustration. He was never the best at saying things, he always showed you better. He wished he could turn you around and get that stupid dress off you so he could cover you in his tee shirt again. He wished he could kiss your tears and hold you again like there wasn’t a mountain between you. He wished he could have you lying on his bed again saying those sweet things that shook him to his very core. He wished he could see your smile again as you drank your honey oat milk latte just the way you liked it because he made it for you. Fuck, he wanted that and so much more, but none of it would happen. He still hated you.

“Give me one good reason why you even talked to me back at the club,” you asked, more poised now that you had calmed your sobs and cleaned your cheeks. You turned to face him and he looked almost like he was in pain, but you only blinked your wet lashes. Your nose, eyes, and cheeks were still red but he knew you were crying, there was no point in hiding it.

“You looked beautiful.”

You scoffed, “Right… Beautiful enough to fuck easy, ri—?”

“Stop saying that!” Your assumptions were driving him crazy, but you were persistent.

“Why? Cause you can’t handle the truth?”

“Cause it’s fucking bullshit!” He smacked his fist on his palm, then opened both as if he could shake you to your senses, “You think fucking you is easy? You think wanting you and bringing you here was fucking easy? I gave in! I saw you, you said those things, and I had to have you!”

“You didn’t have to bring me here.”

“No, I didn’t!” He agreed with you and it made him swallow and take a breath from his shouting. “I did it for my own selfish reasons.”

“And what were those? If not to use me, not to hurt me or exact some sort of vengeance,” you enumerated with your fingers perhaps a bit pettily, but you wanted to understand. However, he didn’t seem interested in sharing — he had turned his back on you and stepped away to have space. “Then what for?��

He grunted and rubbed his face harshly before turning to face you, “Why do you complicate everything? I answered you already — to be with you. That’s all.”

You frowned and puffed; for some reason that answer just left you even more unsettled. “That doesn’t make any sense.” He threw his hands in the air and you insisted, “You wanted to be with me? Then why not let me finish blowing you?”

He scoffed and shook his head, “Thought you would have figured it out by now.”

Your frown deepened in anger, but it hit you. “Because… you didn’t want to use me?” His only response was a twitch of his eyebrows. “Then why not let me cum? When you ate me?”

He puffed a breath as his nostrils flared, but he still answered you, “Cause I was pissed.”

“Why?”

“Why?!” Your question made it worse. “Cause you spoke to me like I was nobody!”

Your chin dropped, “What?”

“You spoke like it could have been anyone else eating you and making you crazy and it made me want to tear you apart!”

You were shocked, just looking at him, and it infuriated him even more. He tried his best to keep his cool as he paced the living room — why were you making him feel inadequate? Like he was blowing something out of proportion when it meant so much to him?

“That's— I don't get it,” you tried, confused. “I wanted you to know how good you felt—”

“You called me baby!”

He was shouting again and you blinked, “So?”

“So?!” He kicked the back of his couch. “The most fucking generic term I’ve ever heard! Do you know how many people have called me that? Made me despise them every time!”

“But I've called you that before,” you pointed out, still confused. It was one of your nicknames for each other.

“You called me something else.”

His tone was suddenly sober and you instantly knew what he meant. “Kook.”

“Yes.”

He wouldn’t tell you how much he was hung up on it. He wouldn’t let anyone else call him that, he kicked out any women who tried, and just hearing it from your mouth now gave him goosebumps. It was who he was to you, who he wished he had been for his whole life.

You were just looking at each other while you recalled calling him ‘baby’ in the heat of your shared moments. You never meant it in a general way, you meant it endearingly. But you had called him ‘Kook’ earlier, and remembering it twisted your guts. You sighed and rubbed your eyes for a second — you had decided to crush your heart then and there. You weren’t leaving his place without bloodshed so there was no point in hiding.

“I was scared of calling you that,” you admitted, facing him again despite your fears. “I was scared of exposing myself like that.”

“Well, I did,” his grin was a sneer, but you couldn’t understand. Why would what you called him hurt him if he didn’t care? “So that was like a punch to my gut. Or maybe… maybe you didn't even notice that I—”

“Of course, I fucking noticed,” you blurted out, something akin to desperation on your features. “I noticed and it made me completely lose my mind!”

He leaned forward, gripping the couch’s back, “Not enough to expose yourself to me.”

“I was scared! You still hate me, I was—” Your own words hit you in realization, and you swallowed the lump in your throat. “I was scared.”

He scoffed, “Scared of what?”

“You know what,” you answered, uneasy.

“I do. See why you have no idea what you’re saying? You just blab and assume shit,” he gripped the leather couch and you thought for a moment he could have thrown it around if he wanted to. “The difference between you and me is that I knew who I was choosing.” His features hardened and you fought the urge to look small. “You said you wanted to do this and I took you.”

Your eyebrows twitched, “You’re trying to say I didn’t? Please,” you rolled your eyes. “Because I didn’t call you Kook sooner? You know better than that. I walked up to you, spoke to you, told you I wanted to be with you, came here with you, told you no one is like you, that I missed you, that no one makes me—” You huffed and bit your lip; you weren’t sure about saying any more than you already had.

His eyes were glistening but his grin was almost cruel. “You don’t look so scared now.”

You frowned for a moment before you raised your chin, “No, I guess I’m not. I was until you embraced me this morning and I thought—” Your lips twitched. “But that was fake,” his eyes snapped to yours and you stood still, “right? You lied. You never missed me, so what does it matter if you called me bubbles?” You scoffed but your eyes were filling with tears again, “Why call me that if you never meant it?” You shrugged, “I have nothing to fear anymore. It’s all fucked, I don’t think it can hurt more than this.”

His jaw was clenching hard while you spoke and he walked around. You thought he looked like a ticking timebomb with his biceps rhythmically reacting to his fists opening and closing.

“Well, I fucking wish it did,” he said. “It seems like nothing I do can hurt you, can it?”

“Are you serious?”

“I’m fucking serious!”

“Do I not look hurt to you?!”

“I want you to hurt at least a fraction of what it hurts me!” He punched the couch, but your watering eyes only hurt him more. “But all I managed to do was hurt myself even more!”

“You’re hurt?” You couldn’t hide your skepticism.

“What do you think?! Fuck, you’re so fucking selfish you can’t see anything in front of your nose!”

You crossed your arms over your chest, “Happens with liars. It’s hard to distinguish—”

“Shut up!” He turned to you and you squeezed your arms for comfort. “What does it matter if I missed you? If every fucking word out of my mouth was the truth and I called you bubbles because of what you fucking mean to me? Look at you!” You were shaking now with welled-up eyes. “Acting like a fucking abandoned puppy! You left!”

“What?”

“You left! You were the one who left!”

Your heart shook and you became pale, “That was— You mean—?”

“Yes!”

“But— You—” You were so confused. “You knew I’d leave!”

“What the fuck does that matter?! You said no and you left!”

Your heart instantly halted, “That’s— That’s something else entirely—”

“Yeah, right!” You shook with the venom in his voice. “I was ready, I made my choice, and you broke my heart!”

You were shaking and gripping your hands to soothe yourself, “I wasn’t ready.”

“You said no!”

His tone was accusatory and your chin trembled as you were swamped with old feelings and memories.

Only this time, you took a deep breath and answered back, “Listen to yourself! That day I told you I was going to the US to work for a year and you asked me to marry you! Does that make sense?!”

He had paced to his desk and as soon as you finished, he grabbed his gaming chair and threw it to the ground.

“You said no! You could have said something else! You could have said not yet or let’s talk or— I don’t know, just anything else! But you said no!!”

“Well, fuck, what was I supposed to say?! I had that job opportunity and you were going too fast!”

He sneered, “Fast?”

“Yes, fast! We weren't together for even a year yet!”

“I don't care! I fucking knew I wanted to spend my life with you! And you said no!”

“I said I love you!”

He kicked the chair on the floor, “And it wasn't enough!”

“No, it wasn't!” You stepped forward, wanting to punch something yourself. “Clearly! You’re fucking mad I said no, but what about you?! You fucking dropped off the face of the earth! You knew the dates of my contract, I forwarded the flight information to you, and you never spoke to me again! You didn’t even say goodbye!”

“What goodbye?! What bigger goodbye do you need than rejecting me when I’m on my knees for you?!”

“Stop being so fucking self-centered!” He started laughing, but you were not done. “I said I loved you. I wanted to be with you and you threw a tantrum like a child!”

“A tantrum?” He was still laughing and you’d recognise that bitterness anywhere.

“Be honest,” you breathed. “Would you have come with me?”

His laughter died. “What?”

“You heard me. And if you couldn’t, would you have waited for me?”

His eyes widened like a deer caught in headlights and you let the tears fall from your eyes.

“I never got to ask,” you continued in the silence. “You never answered me again. I always thought that your not answering was your answer. That you never wanted to see me again because if I wouldn’t marry you like you wanted, then you wanted nothing to do with me.”

He finally breathed, “That’s ridiculous.”

“Is it?” You smiled and cleaned your cheeks, “Then why is that the only thing you say? That I said no? I never meant no forever, I never meant that I wouldn’t in the future. But I needed that opportunity to build my career, I needed that sacrifice from you and you turned your back on me.”

“No, I—” His mouth was opening and closing, he couldn’t find the right words. “Because— Because I thought you wanted to just— To just leave me behind.”

“Behind? As if I wasn’t leaving my heart with you? Tell me, did you ever think about asking me? About talking to me?” His lips twitched in hesitation and your lips curved painfully, “Right.”

“I wanted to,” he admitted, but you shook your head in disbelief. “I wanted to but I felt broken. You left me and rejected a future with me, you didn’t want me. What point was there in reaching out to you?”

“I wish you had. Maybe it wouldn’t have worked, but a part of me likes to believe we would have made it. One year was a long time but not the end of the world. For you, I would have done it.”

You nodded and looked at his feet for a moment. None of you would ever know now, but you believed it. You were at peace with at least having voiced that to him.

You looked up at him and saw as clear as day how lost he was. He was gripping his hair with pain across his features, maybe something else. He was still shirtless in front of you, a Greek God in all his glory, yet your eyes couldn’t abandon the soft curls of his hair. Now that everything was out there, you were sort of melancholic. You’d miss him.

“Fuck,” he dragged in a grunt. “Is this what you wanted? To find me again and break me?”

You chuckled, “What the hell are you saying? I never thought I’d see you again. And if I did, I expected to find you married to the woman of your dreams.”

He groaned and rubbed his face before facing you, “You— You’re the woman of my dreams!”

Your lips trembled but you stayed quiet; you had no idea where any of that left you.

“I can’t believe this,” he let out, then scoffed. “No, I’m in too deep now. You could have reached out too. You could have told me all this and asked me before, but instead, you just turned and left. Because you didn’t want me.”

“I called you!”

“For like two days! How long do you think it took to heal my wounded heart?”

“I don’t know! From what I’ve heard, your heart has been more than comforted, you probably healed very fast!”

“Oh fuck off,” he spat with harsh eyes. You regretted letting those feelings surface, but it was too late. “You left me after rejecting me, I was free to do whatever I wanted and screw whoever I pleased.”

“You’re right, forget I said that.”

He laughed, “Nah, that’s just you. Worried about whether I’ve been well-fed or not. Why? Thought that would make it easier?”

“What?”

“I don’t know, to get me crazy again.”

You couldn’t help your lips pulling, “I did drive you crazy.” His eyebrow twitched over a dark gaze and you quickly sobered up. “But that’s not what I meant.”

“You’re fucking incredible, you know that?” He could be spitting those words for all intents and purposes.

“No, I meant that after I called you, I took your silence as—”

“No, no, fuck that. Excuses, all of it. You saw me on my knees and butchered my heart, then left days later for another country. If you cared, you would have done more.”

“You act as if you don’t have arms and legs yourself.”

“And you act like a damsel in distress when you’re anything but,” he had neared you now and you sobered up. “I still hate you, you know.”

Your lips trembled and you looked down with a sour smile. You did realize it, but it didn’t make it any easier. “I know.”

You were focused on mapping your conversation and seeing if there was anything you could tell him that could clarify things when he scoffed.

“No, scratch that.” You looked up and saw him running his hand through his hair. “I fucking hate you and the way you just tried to bring me down to my knees again.”

“I didn’t—!”

“I hate that I brought you here 'cause I wanted to see you here, in my home, as if that could bring back what we once were. I hate that I gave you what you wanted even if it hurt. I hate that I called you bubbles as if you’re still that person. I hate— I fucking hate you, I can’t—”

His voice broke down but you had already heard too much. You couldn’t face him anymore, you were hiding under your hand as your spirit drained in the form of tears.

“I understand.” Your sight was blurry but you knew the way out. You stepped around him, “I’ll leave—”

You weren’t expecting him to grab you and crash his mouth into yours, but you didn’t fight him. You let him kiss you desperately and did the same all while the tears kept streaming down your face.

“Don’t fucking leave,” he whispered to your lips, pressing his forehead to yours. “I can’t stand the thought of you walking out. Not again.”

Your cry was uncontrollable, “But you hate me.”

His hands were firm around your head, not letting you move away, and the only sound you both could hear was you trying to control your sobs. It broke him to see you cry, it always did. He didn’t know what to do. No matter how hard he tried, there was this poison inside him that gushed out every time. It was all breaking apart again, and he wanted everything to go to hell, but looking at you, he knew that wasn’t true.

You sniffled, “If you hate me and I love you then we're not on the same page.”

His heart shook like his world could crumble at any moment. “Don't leave.”

“I have to,” you grabbed his arms and accepted it. “So you can find the woman of your dreams.”

“You’re the woman of my dreams.”

You chuckled sadly, “You hate me, Kook. You’ll find someone better, trust me.”

“No, I don’t want anyone else.”

You brushed his cheek, committing that sweet touch to memory. “You’ll be happy. It’s okay.”

“No,” he gripped you firmly, wrapping his arms around your waist instead. “Don’t leave.”

“Why would I stay?”

“Because I don’t hate you. I can’t,” his voice trembled with tears that didn’t flow down his cheeks, but down yours. “I hate myself for not being able to, for pretending, for even trying when I’m so—”

His voice blocked and you reached for him. “Say it… Please say it, don’t hold back,” your plea shook in your voice and you gripped his shoulders tighter. “If you don’t say it, then I won't know what to believe anymore—”

“Fuck,” he closed his eyes, fighting to the last moment all those conflicting emotions within him. But then you nuzzled his nose, holding him closer. Waiting. You weren’t leaving this time until everything was said and done, and he almost burst it out. “I can’t. I can’t hate you, I love you. I could never forget you but you left me behind and I fucking hated everything. Because I love you, because I lost you, because I was lost and I still am. What the fuck do I do?”

“I’m here.”

“No, you’re not.” He moved away and forced himself to take a deep breath. He turned to you, “You’ll walk out again. I fucked up. We fucked up, but I fucked up. Right? I spent a year trying to hate you, loathing myself for not being good enough. For being so sure you were the one while you discarded me so easily like I was worthless, but I never bothered to hear your side. I never bothered to ask you. You broke my heart… but I broke yours too.”

Your chin was trembling, but you didn’t near him. He seemed to need the space.

“I’m sorry.” He hid his face at your words and your tears treaded down again. “I’m so sorry if I hurt you, I was stupid and immature, and you’re right. I knew my heart was staying here with you, I should have tried to reach out and make it clearer. I knew I hurt you, and after I left, I knew you'd hate me. I should have gotten over myself and told you how I felt anyway. Then maybe I wouldn’t have tried to look for you in everyone else or stayed hung up on thoughts of you and—” He chuckled but it was laced with pain and you shook your hands, “No, I’m not blaming you!”

“I know,” he revealed his face, with red swollen eyes, and wet cheeks. “I’m blaming myself. I spent so long trying to hate you, blaming you for everything under the sun in stupid attempts to make it hurt less. I’m an idiot. And an asshole. Look at how I treated you. I can’t face you without hating my fucking stupidity—”

“Ours,” you stepped forward, hesitant to touch him but with your hands raised nonetheless. “If you want to hate something, then—”

He grabbed your hand and pulled you in, “I won’t pretend to hate you anymore.”

“Then don’t hate yourself either,” you asked as he took your hand to his lips.

“I’ll try… since it’s you asking.”

Your lips trembled into a smile at the way he was gently brushing his lips to your hand. “I’m happy we talked about it. I’m happy to hear that you still have feelings for me though I wouldn’t want to assume—”

“Assume.”

You stayed quiet, hesitantly looking into his brown eyes as he sprinkled kisses on your knuckles.

“Jungkook—”

“Assume, bubbles.” You pressed your trembling lips and he brushed your cheek with the back of his fingers, “Assume that I love you and don’t want you to leave.”

Your heart was shaking; you were hoping, but— “Are you sure?”

He closed his eyes for a moment, “I’m sure. I just don’t know how to deal with this. I don’t want to hurt you, but there’s so much we need to talk about.”

His eyes were pleading and you squeezed his hand, “If you could forgive me, that would be a great start.”

He sighed, “I don’t think that’s the problem.”

“Yourself?”

“Slightly more complicated.”

You smiled, “Same.” You stayed quiet just looking at each other when you decided to tell him, “I wish we could… forgive our mistakes and restart. We could get to know each other again. See if… If it would work.”

“You don’t think it would?”

You supported his hand on your cheek, “I think we still love each other.” He held your gaze and you felt your cheeks burning under his touch, “But maybe that also means it will be difficult to heal our wounds.”

He nodded calmly, observing your face. “Do you… hate me? For what I did? For never replying to you or fighting for you.”

“No,” you instantly reassured him. “I thought you made a decision and that you wanted to move on from me. That’s a rejection, but that's life. You didn’t cheat or lie or anything like that.”

He sighed, “That’s true… maybe that’s why I could never truly hate you either.”

You couldn’t help a smile, “We… We’re both idiots.”

He wrapped his arm around your waist closer, “A mistake. It was all a mistake.” He pursed his lips for a moment, then brushed your hair gently behind your ear, “Your ‘no’... you never meant forever?”

You grinned, “No. Though I don't need a ring around my finger to know who I belong to. Do you?”

“Who do you belong to?”

You smirked playfully, “I think you know him.”

He sighed and let you brush your fingers around his neck in an attempt to tickle him before lacing your arms around his neck.

“I would have waited,” he finally said, seeing closely how your smile wavered and your eyes filled with tears. “I couldn’t drop everything to go with you, but I would have definitely made it work and visited you whenever I could.”

Your lips trembled and you tried to contain your cry, but your tears won. He pulled you to hide in the crook of his neck and you squeezed him inside your arms.

“Are you… going back?” He realized he didn’t know. “Or are you staying? In Seoul?”

“I got a position here, I’m starting next month.”

He sighed in relief. “I want to try,” his voice was close as he supported your head and leaned over your ear. “Us. I want to try.”

Shivers ran down your spine as you pressed him to you. “Me too.”

#bts fanfic #bts imagines #bts smut #bangtan sonyeondan #bts #ao3 fanfic #SX Seoul #kpop smut #bts jungkook #jungkook smut #smut #bts x fem!reader #bts x you #bts angst #angst with a happy ending #no y/n #jeon jungkook #jungkook x reader #lo1k-diamonds writes 💎

369 notes · View notes

littleluvsie · 27 days

Text

in moments | spencer reid x reader

a/n: little thing i wrote today maybe intended for longer series, not super edited (sorry hehe). trying to get back into the habit of writing with this new side blog. send me any requests if you'd like <3

wc: 1.9k

warnings: fem reader, use of she/her pronouns (reader), shy!reader, early seasons shy spencer, just pure fluff (for now)

There wasn’t a shadow of a doubt in anyone’s mind that the BAU changed when you and Spencer seemingly arrived at their doorstep out of nowhere – both of you young and bright-eyed, but an undeniable force together, a wealth of intelligence. But sometimes – especially in moments like this – the team wondered how either of you managed to function in society up until now. Everyone is watching curiously, trying and failing to hide their amused smiles behind their coffee cups.

You’re nervous. They see it in the way you fiddle with the hem of your sweater behind your back, the way you squeak out your words like you’re afraid of them. If anxiety were personified, it’d look incredibly reminiscent of you. Spencer isn’t any better. From the base of his neck to the tips of his ears, every inch of exposed skin is visibly tinted with a cherry-red hue, and his eyes continue to fixate on everything, everywhere except your face.

“How are they even getting anything done right now? They look like they’re both about to throw up,” Emily mutters.

Morgan nods, “My money is on both of them having nervous breakdowns in the next ten minutes.”

Penelope tries her very best to swallow her laugh, but her efforts prove to be futile as a giggle manages to escape from her lips anyway. She quickly coughs and covers her mouth with her fingertips in an attempt to stifle it, but to no avail. Both you and Spencer hear it and glance over with adorably similar facial expressions, brows tightly knitted together and a hint of a pout gracing your lips.

When you’re only met with silence, you tilt your head questioningly.

“What?”

“Nothing, nothing! How is it going over there? Did you guys find anything?”

“Yeah, actually. Spencer thinks that the Unsub’s location can be narrowed down to these specific neighborhoods given the pattern of…” As you turn to look at Spencer, you realize you’ve made the greatest mistake in your life. It’s as if every possible nerve ending you have in your body surges with electrical current, and you swear you can feel your heart pumping from the middle of your throat. His eyes meet yours, and he’s closer to you than you remember. Was he here the whole time? You have the sudden urge to crawl under the desk and stay there for as long as you can get away with it.

Do his lips always look like this? Has his hair grown out since yesterday? Is he furrowing his brows?

You realize that you haven’t spoken in what must be at least thirty seconds. Spencer would know how long. You feel even worse.

“Given the patterns in where the victims were found.” you finish quietly.

Spencer swivels his chair to face the team and continues with his explanation, but you can barely hear him as all of your thoughts focus on the fact that his leg is now pressed up against yours. You’ve come to the natural conclusion that your brain is no longer functional anymore, your career is over. Maybe if you beg on your knees, Hotch will let you take a sick day?

“Alright, let’s send smaller teams out and cover all possible locations, see what we can find,” Hotch announces from behind you. As he begins assigning pairs, you breathe out a sigh of relief. Now, you’ll have at least a few hours before you have to face Spencer again, and hopefully, by that point, all of the residual awkwardness of your stumble will be completely obliterated from everyone’s memory.

“And (Y/N) and Reid, you’ll take the last of the locations. Let’s debrief here once we’re done.”

As you stare at Hotch in disbelief, you swear there’s a very, very faint hint of a smile on his face.

You’re going to kill him.

~*~*~

Spencer reads through the case file for the millionth time since getting in the car with you. There’s really no point to it; you and everyone else knows he has an eidetic memory, he only had to read it once. If you asked, he’d lie and tell you he does it to pass the time or to just fill the silence with the sound of pages turning. But he thinks he really does it so that he doesn’t have to hear himself stumble over his words trying to talk to you.

It’s torture, being around you. You’re pretty and smart and nice and so wonderful, and if he thinks about it for too long, it hurts his head. Spencer wants to be around you all of the time and simultaneously none of the time – it’s an unsolvable equation, and he hates it. It’s torturous.

Even so, he knows his best days are always spent with you.

Most of your shared time is inevitably spent dissecting the neverending influx of cases received by the BAU. But every once in a while, there are times scattered between the chaos. Sometimes it’s the early mornings before anyone else has arrived, and the both of you drink your coffees together in comfortable silence. Sometimes it’s the late nights spent sitting at your desks across from each other with hot takeout and tired eyes. In these moments, both of you can talk about the books you’ve been reading recently, the best classical music composers, or your favorite episodes of Doctor Who, without any hesitation or uncertainty. Perhaps the delirium of sleep deprivation gives you courage, or maybe it’s just that both of you feel safer in the quiet, when the world feels a lot less overwhelming and all of your focus can be devoted to one another. Regardless, it’s what Spencer looks forward to the most, above all else.

So, he tries.

He clears his throat, “D-Did you know that Carlo Lorenzini, the guy that wrote Pinocchio, was said to be obsessed with the human nose?”

“Really? Huh… I wonder what the origin of the obsession was, y’know where it came from.”

And for just an instant, the anxiety has subsided, quickly replaced by a much stronger, fluttering from the depths of his stomach.

“Not sure, but sources say that he frequently wrote about noses in his earlier stories, so whatever the cause was must’ve been prior to the 1880s, when Pinocchio was published.”

You hum in acknowledgement, “Have you heard about the Pinocchio Paradox before?”

“The one created by Peter Eldridge-Smith’s daughter?”

“Yeah, I think her name was Veronique. What do you think of the possible solutions?”

While he thinks of an answer to your question, he also thinks about how seamlessly you manage to fit into the fragments of his mind. He’s never felt more seen than when you glance over at him, when you think he can’t see you. You’re perfect in a way that feels whole and complete to him, as if there’s nothing else he could ever want or need. He thinks about all of this, and much, much more.

~*~*~

“Do you want a cup of coffee?” Spencer asks. He begins to rise from his seat, rubbing his eyes tiredly.

“Y-Yeah, sure. I’ll come with you though, I think I need a break anyway.”

It’s late, everyone else has gone home. All of the fluorescent, overhead lights in the bullpen are off, both of you opting to turn on a few of the surrounding desk lamps instead.

You don’t particularly like the dark, especially when it’s this late into the night. The walk to the kitchen feels a lot longer this way, your path being guided only by the residual light coming from the streetlights outside.

There’s a sudden crash to your left, and you yelp, jumping towards Spencer.

“Sorry! Sorry, that was me. I accidentally kicked a box of files I guess someone left on the floor, it knocked into one of the desks.”

“No worries! It’s okay. I’m just,” you sigh, “I’m just a little bit afraid of the dark.”

As your adrenaline levels steadily return to baseline, you’re suddenly hyper aware of how your entire body is quite literally pressed up against Spencer’s side, your hands gripping onto his forearm for dear life. But just as you start to loosen your death grip, you feel Spencer’s fingers searching for you in the dim moonlight.

Every thought you’ve ever had, every bit of information you’ve ever learned escapes you in a single breath as he intertwines your fingers with his.

His voice is just barely above a whisper, “I’m a little bit afraid of the dark too.”

Both of you walk the rest of the way to the kitchen in complete silence and at an incredibly slow pace, as if even the sound of your soles against the linoleum floors would ruin this moment. You almost want to keep the abrasive lights of the kitchen off as you finally walk through the doorway with Spencer in tow; you know that the very second you flip the switch, you’ll have to let go of his hand. It’s not realistic for him to keep holding your hand, you chastise yourself. How would he even make his coffee if you’re holding his hand hostage?

You turn the light on. The alternative would be standing in the dark and you couldn’t think of a reasonable excuse for doing so quickly enough.

A beat passes, your eyes adjust to the sudden change in brightness. You look down, and to your surprise, Spencer’s still holding onto your hand. Worse, he’s rubbing slow circles into the back of your hand with his thumb. I will never recover from this, you think.

“D-Do you still want coffee?”

“No, not really,” you respond. With how your heart feels like it might burst out of your chest, you really don’t think it’d be a good idea for you to consume any more caffeine.

“Me neither,” he trails off. His eyes are glued to the floor as if he’s afraid to meet your gaze, as if it’ll make you realize with sudden clarity that it’s his hand you’re holding and you’ll pull away.

“As you become drowsier, adenosine accumulates in the neuronal synapse and binds to the respective receptors located in the synapse of specific central nervous systems neurons causing further drowsiness,” you ramble.

“And caffeine is an adenosine receptor antagonist.”

“Exactly, and knockout mice studies reveal that it’s specifically the adenosine A2A receptor which is a member of the G-protein coupled receptor family.”

“Interesting. Even though you only have one PhD, having it in biology seems to be proving pretty useful,” he smiles.

“Yeah. I mean, it’s gotten me this far, wait what do you mean only one?”

“Dr. (Y/L/N), you realize I have three, right?”

“Dr. Reid, please shut up.”

You make him feel safe.

“Okay, sorry,” he giggles, “Can you please tell me more about caffeine?”

And because he asked so nicely, because he smiles at you the way he does, you tell him more. It’s nearly the middle of the night, but you’d still stay up and you would tell him everything you know, as long as he continued looking at you with his soft, brown eyes.

You both talk about everything and anything either of you think of, all while holding each other in the palm of your hands.

The next morning, he sits even closer to you. Luckily, it’s slowly getting easier to talk to him without losing the ability to form coherent thoughts, but it’s still hard sometimes. You still get nervous when he looks at you. You can still feel the butterflies flapping against the walls of your stomach, especially when he holds your hand underneath the desk.

Both of you think you’re being subtle, but everyone notices. They pretend they don’t.

#spencer reid #spencer reid x reader #spencer reid x you #spencer reid x y/n #spencer reid x self insert #spencer reid imagine #spencer reid fic #spencer reid fluff #spencer reid fanfic #spencer reid fanfiction #criminal minds #criminal minds x reader #criminal minds fanfiction #criminal minds fic #criminal minds imagine #bau team

317 notes · View notes

homestylehughes · 4 months

Text

quinn hughes- drowning

summary: when y/n is drowning in her love for Quinn, and feels the need to step back from him. what happens that Quinn is also drowning in her love too?

wc: 1.9k OMFGG HELLOOOOOOO???? this the longest fic I've ever wrote. holy fuck.

authors note: dun dun dun I'm backkkkk. ive had free time because of my classes being cancelled because of the weather. so I decided to sit down and write about quinny today <3. I hope you guys enjoy this is the longest fic I've everrrr wrote. make sure to reblog if you like enjoy it. as always much loveeeee.

Everyone told me not to fall in love with Quinn hughes. I told myself not to fall in love with Quinn Hughes. That It would be impossible for him to ever love me back in the way I loved him.

Obviously I didn't listen.

I fell head over heels in love with him. I was sinking, no I was drowning. Nothing could pull me out now. I was in too far deep, I was in too far deep to care that I was in love with Quinn hughes. It was so hard not to care, it was so hard to not fall in love with him. Longing gazes when we were out with our friends. The way he'd put his hand on my lower back when guiding me through a crowd. The way he’d listen so intently to things I would say. Everything little thing he did pulled me into him, everything he did pulled me under. I was drowning, I couldn't seem to care.

That's what led me to this.

I knew that I was deep, I needed space. I haven't seen or talked to Quinn in over 2 weeks. I told myself I needed to distance myself from him. If I could pull myself away from him, then I could pull myself out from drowning in him.

So I threw myself into my job, taking as many stories as I could from my boss. Declining dinners and drinks from my friends, from quinn. Ignoring his texts and declining his calls. I thought what I was doing was the right thing to do, it seemed like the easiest thing to do. I knew if I ever admitted to Quinn that I was in love with him, he wouldn't feel the same way. I'm trying to save myself a heart break, but what's the point? My hearts are already breaking by doing this.

When the 3 week mark hit of not talking to quinn i felt better. Kinda. I still miss talking to him, actually scratch that, i miss everything little thing about him. I continue to tell myself that this is for the best. Do I even know what I want, is this even for the best? The texts and calls from Quinn stopped showing up. He gave up on me, no i gave up on him. I did this and it's for the best. Even though I repeated this to myself everyday, I still felt I was making the wrong choice.

My friends finally convinced me to leave my apartment. Making me put in the tightest outfit possible, and pulling me into the nearest bar. I make a beeline to the bar, ordering a drink to hopefully calm my nerves and help relax me. Being here in this bar made me remember how much I hate bars. It made me remember how much I miss Quinn.

We make our way to the table with trays of drinks in our hands, tonight is going to be a good night. Well I thought it was. As I glanced up to see where one of my friends went, my eyes landed on her with a group of men. Men that look very familiar to me. My eyes drift left of my friend, and land right on Quinn. Our eyes meet for the first time in over 3 weeks. My heartbeat starts rising immediately, and suddenly I feel like I'm drowning again. The dress I'm wearing seems even tighter, and the bar feels like fire all around me.

I need to get out of here, I say to myself. My eyes trying to find the next exit, I turn to my friend y/f/n and say “hey, I'm going to go outside, I need some fresh air. I'll be back in a second!!”. I don't wait for her reply, I turn on my heels, quickly moving towards the closest exit.

The minute I step outside it hits me. Quinn. Quinn is really here. Quinn, my best friend, the man im inlove with is here. The man I've ignored for almost a month or more with no explanation is here. It hits me, I'm a terrible person. Why did I do that to him, why did I do this to us.

I need to go home now. Home. Home. Home. was the only thing on my mind.

My hands are shaking trying to pull up uber to get a ride home. Anywhere is better than here right now, this is all too much. As I'm going to hit “Confirm payment” on the car ride home. I hear an all too familiar voice shout my name.

This can't be happening. No No No.

The next thing I know is that Quinn is standing right in front of me. “y/n” he breathes out at me. I can't move, I'm frozen. I'm in shock, this can't be real. “y/n” he repeats. I finally looked into his eyes, my eyes dragging all over his face. Everything is as perfect as I remember it. “Quinn” I finally uttered while looking at the ground. I wish I was dreaming. I wish that what's happening isn't real. I can't even look him in the eyes. I wish it was a dream, and that when I woke up this was all fake.

This definitely isn't a dream.

“You know you fucking suck.” Quinn says. I know I do, I think to myself. As I go to open my mouth to say something. He starts again “I haven't talked to you in over a month. You've been ignoring me. And the first time I see you again with your friends at a bar?!?!”. I can't even look at him, continuing to stare at his Nike covered feet. My eyes filled with tears. I hear him take another deep angry breath. “SEE??? You can't even look at me, you can't even look me in the eyes. You won't even give me an explanation. You know that's really shitty of you y/n.”.

I'm crying now. I'm sobbing. Everything he's saying is true. I am a terrible person, this is all my fault I know. I know.

I heard him scoff and began to walk away. I can't let this happen, I can't let this happen again. “QUINN” I shouted, finally finding my voice. His steps immediately stop, he slowly turns around. I can see the anger and sadness in his eyes.

This time I'm approaching him, taking a shaky breath. Trying to gather the words that I don't have to say. “I know you hate me right now. I know that you want answers, hell you want an explanation on why i haven't talked to you in over month.’’ My breath labors for a minute, I'm sobbing, the tears are flowing, my chest is rising, I'm not ready for this. I know nothing I say is ever going to change what I did to him.

I try to take deep breaths but each one I take makes the tears fall even harder. Here I am crying on the sidewalk in front of my best friend. who might not even be my best friend anymore. Trying my best to give him an explanation on why I've been so horrible to him. Why I've cut him out of my life just because I love him. Oh god i love him, how do i tell him that??

I feel a hand wrap around my arm, that quickly pulls me back to reality. “Hey hey y/n, pretty girl please look at me.” I'm still sobbing at this point, I don't think the tears will ever stop. I slowly take my eyes up to his face. “That's good, now take a deep breath for me, in and out come on i know you can do it.” he says. Quinns hands are now on my cheeks trying to help me calm down.

My breathing starts to slow down, my tears let up a little bit. Our eyes are still locked, never once leaving each other. I know I need to say something. I know I need to tell him how I feel. I slowly pull away from quinns hold, I'm now again looking at his feet. I take a deep breath, it's now or never I think. “I fell in love with you. Fuck quinn i was drownding in you. You were my best friend and I couldn't feel that way about you. I know you'd never want me in the way I wanted you. I needed space, I thought that if I was away from you it would help my feelings, that somehow I could get over it?? That I could forget about you?? I don't know!?!?! Just move on??”. “But seeing you tonight made me realize that I could never get over you, and that I could never stop loving you.”

The tears on my face are falling like waterfalls, I sadly chuckle to myself as I try and wipe them away as more fall. “I'm sorry, I'm so sorry. Nothing I say will probably make you forgive me. I understand i really really fucked up. But I won't say sorry for loving you. I love you and it's okay if you don't love me.” I finally looked into Quinn's eyes, searching for anything. Anything.

Before I can even register what's happening, Quinn’s hands are grabbing my face, pulling my lips to his. The kiss is fast, it's full of love and anger, sadness. All of the above. My lips struggle to keep up with him, my hands make their way to the back of his head, pulling him into me by the ends of his hair. A groan escapes his lips, as he pulls me even closer into him, if it's even possible. Our lips are moving at lightning speed, we can't get enough of each other. I don't want to ever stop kissing Quinn, it feels too good to ever want to stop.

It feels like 5 years go by before Quinn pulls his lips from mine. Our chests are rising steadily. Eyes blown, swollen lips looking back at each other. “I've wanted to do that since I met you,” he says. My head is spinning, nothing that just happened feels real. Quinn sighs, grabbing my hands in his, his eyes never leaving mine. “I wish you would have told me how you felt. You would have known that I also love you. I've loved you for years. I thought i lost you y/n, i was going crazy with you. I thought you hated me. Baby I was drowning in you, I thought you knew, I wish you knew sooner.”

Quinn loves me? Quinn. Love. Me. my eyes are wide, his mouth is parted waiting for my reaction. Waiting for me to say something. I'm crying again before I know it again. A smile breaks on lips, i'm laughing, quinns laughing. I'm not sure if we know why. I pull his lips towards mine again. Feeling his smile on mine. “I love you''. I whisper to him in between each kiss. “I love you” he whispers back.

I could drown in him forever, if it's on a sidewalk in front of a random bar. If it's a bed, a car. Hell even in a movie theater. I'd always drown for Quinn Hughes.

#nhl fanfiction #nhl hockey #nhl fic #nhl x reader #nhl imagine #quinn hughes #vancouver #vancover canucks #quinn hughes x reader

245 notes · View notes

natti-ice · 2 months

Text

Steve Harrington NSFW Alphabet

Warnings: 18+ mdni, all NSFW Headcanons under the cut

Author’s note: this is a reupload, I wrote this a while ago!

Reblogs and comments are greatly appreciated<3

A = Aftercare (what they're like after sex)

Clingy. He needs to hold you or be held after sex, he's never opposed to be little spoon.

B = Body part (their favorite body part of theirs and also their partner's)

Steve likes your back, he loves tracing every curve. He adores your shape.

What he likes about himself is his neck, it’s kind of odd but he likes the look of it.

C = Cum (anything to do with cum, basically)

He loves when you cum on his face, face sitting is one of his favorite positions. He gets really giddy when he makes you cum, it’s very rewarding to him.

D = Dirty secret (pretty self-explanatory, a dirty secret of theirs)

He’s a panty thief. No further explanation.

E = Experience (how experienced are they? do they know what they're doing?)

He’s had a handful of sexual partners but he still learning. He loves when you tell him the things you like and the things he can do better to make you enjoy yourself more.

F = Favorite position (this goes without saying)

He has a few favorites, he like face sitting but he really loves you on top. He likes to hold your waist while you bounce on his dick.

G = Goofy (are they more serious in the moment? are they humorous? etc.)

The first few times you have sex he’s pretty serious, once you get more comfortable with each other his playful side comes out more.

H = Hair (how well-groomed are they? does the carpet match the drapes? etc.)

He keeps it trimmed down there, not to the point were it’s bald but enough for some friction. He has a nicely groomed happy trail

I = Intimacy (how are they during the moment? the romantic aspect)

Steve is a romantic, he whispers sweet nothings in you ear. Anything to make you smile

J = Jack off (masturbation headcanon)

He’s not a very avid masturbator, he mostly only masturbates after watching a raunchy movie. Or whenever he’s trying to fall asleep and he thinks about the nights you’ve spent together.

K = Kink (one or more of their kinks)

He has a slight mommy kink. He loves being taken care of, being praised, he even slips a ‘mommy’ in there here and there.

L = Location (favorite places to do the do)

Any and every where. He’ll fuck you in the car, in the park (when it’s empty of course), honestly anywhere you’re comfortable.

M = Motivation (what turns them on, gets them going)

Steve could have sex any time of the day, he always ready. Teasing really works him up, you could tease him about anything and he wants to fuck you right there.

N = No (something they wouldn't do, turn offs)

Nothing would really turn him off necessarily, as long as he’s with you anything goes.

O = Oral (preference in giving or receiving, skill, etc.)

A master with the tongue. Without fail, he will make you cum while eating you out every time. He prefers to give, making you feel good makes him feel good. Plus he loves the way you taste.

P = Pace (are they fast and rough? slow and sensual? etc.)

This depends on his mood, if he’s had a bad day he can be pretty rough but if he’s happy he takes his time. The longer the better.

Q = Quickie (their opinions on quickies, how often, etc.)

There are a few quickies throughout the day especially in the beginning of the relationship. It doesn’t matter where you’re at, if you’re horny he’ll find a way.

R = Risk (are they game to experiment? do they take risks? etc.)

Steve was hesitant at first to try new things, mainly because he was afraid he would be bad at it. He starts slow, introducing small kinks into the bedroom like spanking ease him into exploring.

S = Stamina (how many rounds can they go for? how long do they last?)

He lasts pretty long, especially when he takes his time. He’s quite physically fit so he can go for a while, sex can last up to an hour with him. Orgasm after orgasm.

T = Toys (do they own toys? do they use them? on a partner or themselves?)

He’s down to use sex toys on you, dildos, vibrators, etc. Maybe with a bit of alcohol, he’d let you use a toy on him.

U = Unfair (how much they like to tease)

Steve the tease. He lives to make you giggle and squirm under his touch. He teases just enough to make you beg.

V = Volume (how loud they are, what sounds they make, etc.)

Steve’s more vocal during foreplay, dirty talk, telling you all the things he’s going to do to you. During the deed he’s a moaner, he’s not loud but he’ll moan in your ear sending tingles down your spine.

W = Wild card (a random headcanon for the character)

He was so nervous during your first time, he stuttered a lot and so focused on doing a good job. He started to relax when he saw you were really enjoying yourself.

X = X-ray (let's see what's going on under those clothes)

Well endowed. His dick is quite big, not scary big but you know it’ll definitely leave you satisfied.

Y = Yearning (how high is their sex drive?)

Like I said, any time any where. There a part of him that’s always horny but he can control it pretty well.

Z = Zzz (how quickly they fall asleep afterward)

He’s pretty tuckered out after sex, he puts in a lot of energy while fucking. He falls a sleep pretty quickly and he sleeps very happy.

Tags: @ali-r3n @thatweirdgirlwholives @cancelledkaley @supersmexyandhot @arthurcerverogf @asimpforthe80s @yeaiamme2 @boa-hemian @thiccthighbby @jethro-mcgee-tony @limerence-17 @halflifejess @mandies24 @timbradfordisbae @songbirdofthenight

Join a tag list!

#natti’s 18+#steve harrington x reader #steve harrington x reader smut #steve harrington x you #steve harrington x y/n #steve harrington smut #steve harrington headcanon #steve harrington x fem!reader #steve harrington x y/n smut #stranger things #stranger things smut

157 notes · View notes

watermelonlovershigh · 7 days

Text

Returning Favors {part 5.} (housemate!harry series) (SMUT)

A Shift Occurs {part 4.} (housemate!harry series) (SMUT)

AN: when i started this chapter i had intended for it to go in a completely different direction but as i began writing it, i let the words flow and wrote it this way instead. i really hope you enjoy and don't forget to leave your feedback and remember to send in things you'd like to see in this series. xoxo

This story contains: mentions of handjobs and blowjobs, slight angst, pillow talk, cunilingus, fluff

{ housemate!harry - friendrry - friends to lovers trope - softrry }

word count- 3,459

While making arrangements to introduce your friends to Harry, he seizes the chance to ask about your abrupt departure after your intimate encounter earlier that day. This conversation unexpectedly leads to Harry performing oral sex on you for the first time.

As you make your way around the street corner, you are greeted by your friends, Mave and Charlotte, who are waving you over to the table they had set aside for your brunch. The cafe features a beautiful outdoor space, perfect for the current time of year. Upon joining them, they quickly pick up on your more upbeat attitude. While you typically don't appear gloomy, you have been feeling rather indifferent for the past year. However today, they observe a slight improvement in your mood.

"Hi, Hi." you lean in to kiss each of their cheeks and sit down at the round table.

"We've ordered you a mimosa. Wasn't sure what you wanted to eat so we haven't ordered our food yet though." Charlotte explans.

"Oh, well thank you." you take a sip of your mimosa and moan at how delicious the drink is.

"What's making you so cheerful today? Is it because of Harry?" Mave questions with cheeky smile, aware of your growing connection with your housemate and the recent revelation of your mutual feelings towards one another. Your friends are genuinely happy for you, knowing how long you've been single and how it affected you.

Brushing them off, you answer, "What? A girl can't look happy on a Sunday morning without there being a reason?" But they know you better then that. The aurora you're giving off is one of a girl who's in love. Though they wouldn't tell you that this soon in your relationship with Harry.

"No it's just," Mave starts, "look, we want the details. Did you guys have sex this morning? Because you look like your glowing and it's not from your skincare routine." Her and Charlotte stare you down, waiting for an answer and you know you must give them one. Otherwise they'll never let this conversation rest.

"Alright, alright. We did do some sexual stuff this morning. But not sex. I just kind of gave him a handjob which then turned into a blowjob."

Your two friends are smiling ear to ear at your confession. "And.... what else? Don't tell us he left you high and dry after you literally had his dick in your mouth." Charlotte utters in a hushed yet audible tone, ensuring that you can hear her amidst the bustling traffic and crowd, while hopefully keeping your conversation private from others.

You express with annoyance in your tone, "It wasn't as you think. I woke up to find him cuddling me and noticed he was aroused. Therefore, I chose to assist him. Once he woke up and realized he was hard, he eventually agreed to my help. I began by giving him a handjob under his briefs, but then decided to go further with a blowjob. And he didn't reciprocate because I left quickly after he came. So, I'm unsure whether he would've wanted to do something for me in return."

Mave reaches across the table and playfully swats your arm. "You fuckin' idiot. You should have stayed to see if he would've pleasured you as well. You could've gotten an amazing orgasm out of him."

"Hey," you spit back, "I did have an amazing orgasm this morning. Just... with my vibrator in the shower before I came here." Though you're sure Harry would beat every single one of your toys if you gave him the chance to prove it.

After chatting for a few more minutes you realized just how hungry you were and decided to order your food and another round of mimosas. You catch up on each others lives and make plans for them to come by the house to hang out one night. They have yet to meet Harry and you thought what better way to introduce them than to invite them over for some drinks and maybe a card game. You'll just have to ask him if that would be okay.

-----------------------------

Upon returning home later that evening, you notice Harry seated on the sofa, engrossed in a pile of papers and his laptop resting on his lap. Presumably grading tests, you assume. After placing your bag in the entryway, you make your way over to the couch. Surprisingly, the atmosphere doesn't feel as awkward as you had anticipated, considering the events that unfolded earlier in the day.

"How was your brunch?" Harry questions, shifting to set all of his work onto the coffee table.

"Great. Really fun." you answer before continuing, "So I have a question."

"Hm, so do I actually but go on." Harry replies, taking a sip of his coffee. He doesn't know what your question is but he knows his question is in reference to why you ran off so quickly this morning after you gave him that blowjob. It's been eating at his mind all day and he'd really like some closure so he can relax.

"Okay, so I was thinking we could have a little get-together with my friends, Mave and Charlotte. They're eager to meet you, and I thought it would be a great opportunity to invite them over this upcoming weekend. We can enjoy some drinks and perhaps even play that card game I purchased some time ago but haven't had the chance to play yet."

Harry nods in agreement. "Yeah, sounds great. How about this Friday night? I can stop by the shops on my way home from work and grab some alcohol. Just let me know what kind they prefer." He is genuinely excited to finally meet your friends. Since becoming your housemate, you've kept your personal life mostly private from him. As a result, he hasn't had the chance to meet any of your family members and has only heard stories about your friends.

"Fantastic," you declare, jumping up from the couch excitedly. "I'll call them right away and let them know. They'll be so happy." Just as Harry was about to remind you that he had a question as well, you've already disappeared from his line of sight. Your sudden departures today seem to be a trend. He reckons he'll have to wait a bit longer to find out the reasoning behind your quick exit this morning.

-----------------------------

At approximately ten o'clock at night, you and Harry are lying in your bed, watching reruns of Friends while trying to stay awake. The room is dark besides the glare of the tv and his cat Pixie is nestled in the middle of the bed, sleeping soundly. Although she hasn't always been allowed in your room, ever since Harry started visiting so frequently, you have embraced her presence as well.

Right as your eyes began to shut, you remember how Harry had a question for you earlier but never got to ask it. You didn't mean to run off like you did. You just got excited to call your friends and let them know they're welcomed to come by the house this Friday for the small gathering. Which in turn made you totally forget he had a question in the first place.

"Harry," you say aloud. The call of his name startles him. He'd just dozed off to sleep and your voice pulled him away from the unconsciousness he was about to enter.

"Mhm, what?" he grumbles, eyes half open as he tries to stay awake in order to hear you speak.

"What's your question? You said earlier you had a question but you never got to ask me it."

Harry found himself more awake as he thought about how to bring up his question. To be honest, he was feeling a bit nervous to ask. Even though this question had been on his mind all day, he hesitated to ask, not wanting to make you uncomfortable or create any distance between you. "Um, was just gonna ask why you left so suddenly this mornin'. You know, after you gave me that blowjob? It seemed like you were ashamed of your actions or somethin'. I was plannin' to return the favor, but you left before I had the opportunity to ask."

With heart shaped eyes, you coo softly, "You were?"

"Well yeah. It's only right that I returned the favor you did for me. I'm not a douche bag like some men can be."

"Awe, that's so sweet of you. But um, I don't know. Guess I remembered how I'd just woke up and maybe didn't smell the best down there or that I may have tasted bad from the hours of sleep I was in prior. Just didn't want to disgust you in any way."

With a gentle tone, Harry expressed, "Y/n, your scent or taste wouldn't have been an issue for me. Even if it was there, I wouldn't have mind. Because it's you, and I genuinely care about you. I would have found pleasure in it regardless. If anyone has ever made you feel insecure about the natural smell of your vagina, they are truly right dicks"

Breathing deeply, you sadly admit, "Yeah, I've had some men attempt to go down on me first thing in the morning but complained about the way I smelt or tasted and so, I just didn't want you to do the same as them."

Sliding impossibly close to you, Harry responds back, "Well I'm not those other men. I respect women more than that and I may just have a thing for oral sex. Givin' and receivin'. Plus, it feels even better when you really know and trust the person."

You giggle shyly and except his closeness, the two of you laying on your sides facing each other. "Dick or pussy though?"

"What?" Harry asks with a sleepy smile, unsure of what you're questioning.

"You said you had a thing for oral sex. So do you prefer sucking dick or eating pussy?"

"Mhm, depends on who the person is and my connection to them. Both are great but it also depends on what mood I'm in to give you a solid answer." It's no secret Harry likes men as well. When you first moved in with him he had a short fling with a guy and you assumed he was gay for like the first month. But then when you heard a girl moaning through his bedroom walls, you realized that wasn't the case. The next day you questioned him and he confidently came out as bisexual to you.

Deciding to continue these questions just to see where it could lead, you keep going, "And, what mood are you in right now?"

Harry suddenly became aware of the dense atmosphere, yet he responded truthfully. "Considerin' that I'm currently in your bed, nearly cuddling you, and you happen to possess a vagina, I would say 'pussy.' However, if I were to discover that you possessed a penis, the answer would be 'cock.'"

He moves one of his hands up to cradle the side of your face. It's so incredibly close to his that he can just about taste the mint of your toothpaste. "Good thing I have one of those two options then and I'm not some alien with no genitals at all."

What Harry wants to say is that he'd love you just the same, even if you were a genitalless alien, but he can't. Not yet anyways. So he responds, "Wouldn't change how I feel about you." With the close proximity, you get the sudden urge to surge forward and clash your lips with his. As if he felt this coming, Harry didn't react surprised at all and accepts the kiss. You both realized this is the first time you've kissed each other. You've shared your feelings, your beds, and you've gave him a blowjob. Yet this makes your first time kissing.

Harry intensifies the kiss by gently prodding his tongue against your lips, and you grant him permission to enter. The kiss is wet, rushed, and somewhat messy, yet incredibly enjoyable. After a minute of exchanging saliva, you pull back to take a deep breath and confidently state, "Prove it then. Prove you're in the mood for some pussy."

With surprise written on his face, Harry leans back a tiny bit to make sure he's reading you correctly. "You sure? I don't have to if......" He'd be more than happy to eat you out right here, right now, but he doesn't want you to ask because you feel obligated to agree or because you're in the heat of the moment.

Responding eagerly, you assert, "Yes, I'm sure. But please be quick before I change my mind." The mention of urgency and the potential for a change of mind prompts Harry to swiftly toss the covers back and carefully positions himself between your legs. He gently lifts Pixie from the bed and places her on the floor where she discovers her cat bed near the window sill and resumes her peaceful sleep.

At this very moment, Harry finds himself surprisingly nervous as he positions himself between your legs. Although he has longed to perform oral sex on you, both this morning and in his countless fantasies, the actual prospect of doing so fills him with apprehension that he may not satisfy you adequately. Additionally, he frets over the possibility of being unable to bring you to orgasm.

Curiosity arose within you as to why Harry was taking such a long time, prompting you to prop yourself up on your elbows. From this viewpoint, you observed him fixating on your bottom half, which was concealed by some skimpy shorts you typically sleep in. However, as soon as he notices your gaze upon him, he swiftly reaches up and tugs at the waistband of your shorts, pulling them down your legs. To his astonishment, you're not wearing any panties which causing Harry to let out a moan upon catching sight of your naked pussy.

Despite the room being enveloped in a soft glow from the television, it remained dimly lit and quiet. Harry couldn't obtain a clear image of your exposed cunt but he could perceive enough to develop a strong liking to it already. However, this attraction isn't solely based on the physical appearance of your vagina, but rather because it's a part of you.

Harry looks up once more to ensure your approval for his actions. With a nod of reassurance from you, he eagerly begins. His mouth envelops your entire pussy, as his tongue moves from your wet entrance to your sensitive clit. The flavor of you on his tongue almost brings him to climax instantly, hands free. This is undoubtedly the best cunt he's ever had. Your skin is incredibly soft and inviting, with only a few short hairs littered around your bikini area from the shave you did two days ago.

As your elbows grow weaker, you find yourself sinking into the comfortable bed below. Harry's tongue skillfully laps up your arousal before focusing on your clit and experimenting with various flicking patterns. Each time his tongue glides over the sensitive nerves, your entire body responds with a powerful jolt of electricity. It's no secret that your clit is extremely sensitive when receiving attention from the right person.

"Oh fuck, Harry. Feels so good." you moan aloud, reaching down to grab onto his curly locks.

You fear he'll tell you not to touch him, but as he briefly moves his mouth away, he commands, "Tug my hair, baby. It feels amazing." Could it be that he just referred to you as 'baby' for the first time? You believe so, and it heightens your arousal even further.

Listening to Harry's wishes, you pull his hair tightly in your fists, causing his face to be nestled against your pussy impossibly closer than before. You begin to move your hips, creating a subtle rocking motion. Although he may feel a slight burning sensation on his scalp due to the intensity of your grip, as he mentioned, he loves the sensation it gives.

A minute more goes by of Harry munching down on your wet pussy when you feel your orgasm nearly bubble over. "I... I'm..." you try to warn but can't even get the words out from how much pleasure you're in. Harry doesn't say a word back, just goes in even harder, more determined to bring you over the edge.

You finally achieve orgasm when he seals his lips around your clit, applying firm and forceful sucks. Your clitoris pulsates within his mouth, causing you to release an animalistic scream as your orgasm sweeps through your body. Your entire body trembles, compelling Harry to firmly hold your hips to keep you in place. He continues sucking on your clit until your orgasm begins to fade and overstimulation sets in.

The hands that once laced in his hair start trying to push his head away. "Har.... Oh God!" you gasp when he gives your tiny nerve a few more kitten licks to make sure he's pulled every ounce of pleasure from you that he can. You lie there trembling from the aftershocks of your orgasm as Harry sits up on his knees, breathing heavy with a glossy mouth.

Eager to know, though the answer should be evident with how you look right now, Harry asks, "So.... was I any good? Did that prove what mood I was in to you?"

You glance forward to see a devilish smile plastered on Harry's face and just know he's proud of himself. Which, he should. You don't think you've ever came so hard in your entire life. "Yes," you heave, "Oh God, yes. I'm...., that was, God. That was the best orgasm I've ever had."

"Yeah? You just tellin' me that to boost my ego or are you tellin' the truth?"

"Harry, I quit literally can't feel my bones right now. They're like jello. No man nor any one of my strongest vibrators have made me come that hard. No wonder the ladies liked you."

With the awareness that it's already very late and he has work the next morning, Harry decides to rise from the bed and make his way to the bathroom in the hallway to fetch a damp cloth. Your exhaustion prevents you from mustering the energy to question his actions. When he returns, you immediately recognize what he has and instinctively close your legs, still experiencing discomfort.

Harry takes a seat on the edge of the mattress and lightly taps your thighs, silently requesting you to open up. Reluctantly, you comply. As you feel the damp cloth glide over your swollen pussy, you try to pull away, but he firmly holds you in place with one hand on your hip bone. "Shh, it's alright," he reassures you in a gentle tone. "I'm just gonna clean you up, and then we can sleep, okay?"

As you lie on the bed, you notice Harry's erection prominently displayed through his black briefs and a pang of guilt washes over you for not pleasuring him. "But.......what about you? You're still hard. I could give you another blowjob or handjob. Whatever you want." Despite the tempting offer, Harry is too exhausted to engage in any additional activities tonight. Prior to this moment, he was on the brink of unconsciousness. Consequently, his drowsy state has returned as the explicit actions have ceased.

"It'll eventually go away, Y/n. I've got work in the mornin' and it's past midnight as is. Plus m'too tired to do anythin' more tonight. But, if I wasn't so tired and didn't have work so early, then you bet your ass I'd take you up on that offer."

Harry finishes cleaning between your legs and helps you slip your shorts back on. He then turns the TV off and crawls back into your bed beside you. Though your limbs are still weak, you manage to slide over until your head rests on his bare chest and your top leg is thrown over his hairy thigh closest to you.

As the moonlight glows through your bedroom window, sleep takes over both of you as the world around becomes quiet. The only sounds that can be heard are Pixie's soft purring from her location on the floor, the steadiness of Harry's heartbeat, and your exhails of breath.

In your dreaming state, you're still excited for the arrival of this upcoming Friday where you eagerly await the moment when your friends will finally have the chance to meet Harry. With high hopes for a successful gathering, you envision a joyous time ahead. Unbeknownst to Harry, the card game planned for the small get-together holds an R rating, implying that it will serve as an opportunity for everyone to bond and deepen their connections without the need for uncomfortable conversations in the future. Plus, mixed with the alcohol, you can't wait to find out some of Harry's dirty secrets.

(PLEASE REBLOG BECAUSE WRITING IS NOT EASY AND IT'S FREE SO JUST DO IT)

(no more tags are allowed because i've hit my number limit. sorry : ( )

tag list: @one-sweet-gubler // @harryscherrysugar // @hsfanficsrecss // @lollypopsx // @harrycanyonmoonn // @allthelovehes // @damnasstyles // @mrsstylesharry // @softmullet // @meetmyblondemuffins // @thegirlnextdoorssister // @stanleystyles // @haarrrys // @michellekstyles // @skyangel57 // @the-gardener-31 // @lhharrylilpumpkin // @yousunshine-youtemptress // @clairestylessss // @kissmyaxe140 // @goldenmelonsugar-hi // @kaitieskidmore97 // @florencepughily // @alienorknight //@dancearoundthelivingroom // @swiftmendeshoran

// @luv-flor7777 // @alohastyles-x // @tenaciousperfectionunknown // @sleutherclaw // @siredtohybrid // @whoscamila // @a-strange-familiar // @golden-elodie // @mrspeacem1nusone // @goldenkhae // @lntwithhrry // @shadowygladiatorlight // @manifestrry //@mendesblurb // @sunshinemoonsposts // @depersonalizationsucks // @academiaghost // @zendayassimp // @reveriehs // @vsnnstuff // @dancinsunflowerkiwi // @quinnsgrapejuice // @walkingintheheartbreaksatellite // @justlemmeholdyou // @hsonlyangelxo // @luvonstyles // @howdey

______________

My Masterlist Masterpost

#harry styles #harry styles fan fiction #harry styles fic rec #friend!harry #friendrry #housemate!harry #housematerry #softrry #soft!harry #harry x reader #harry styles angst #harry styles fluff #harry styles series #friends to lovers #harry styles one shot #harry styles blurb #teacher!harry #bisexual!harry

127 notes · View notes

fuckyeahdindjarin · 1 year

Note

Congrats on your unique milestone!!

Hmm how about a micro with Dieter Bravo and Library AU?

Hi lovely! Thank you for this request. This turned out to be something completely different than what I expected, but... I kind of dig the vibe 🤷🏻‍♀️ I have no good explanation for this, but I hope you find some kind of enjoyment in it!

Dieter Bravo x library AU

Fuck Yeah 2222 Sleepover micro drabble request | 800 words | warnings: grumpy, booklover!Dieter, librarian!Reader, I honestly don't know what else to say lol, I can't explain what I've written

Dieter Bravo tosses a dogeared paperback onto the check-out counter at the local library and fishes for his wallet somewhere in the depths of his sweatpants.

You take one look at the familiar cover, and blurt out, ‘That’s my favourite book.’

He hums, not particularly interested in your opinion as he hands you his library card, which you’d personally printed out and laminated when the request from the mayor’s office came through a week ago.

At his dismissive air, you grumble under your breath, ‘It’s way better than that dumpster fire of a book that your movie is adapted from.’

That catches his attention.

Skeptical eyebrows ascend from behind his dark sunglasses. ‘Is that right?’

Having checked out the book, you slide it across the desk to him with a faux sweet smile. ‘Wouldn’t you like to know.’

Dieter comes into the library every Thursday, after filming hours. You want to say you don’t understand why he does, but your workplace is one of two spots that’s still open after six o’clock in your tiny little town, the other being the local diner. And you guess there’s only so much drugs you can do in one’s hotel room before that gets boring too.

The next week, he returns your favourite book and surprises you with a question. ‘Got anything else like this one?’

So back and forth you go. He never tells you if he likes the books. He barely grunts two words at you, the sunglasses always firmly on, ringed fingers tapping on the counter impatiently when you beep the bar codes on his card and the book you recommend that week.

You don’t mind. You work at the library for a reason, and it’s not for a love of talking.

The weeks wind down, and soon there are whispers that his movie will wrap soon, in a couple of weeks. You’re not exactly sad, but you’ve liked sharing your favourite books with this man, whose glitzy, high-flying life is so far removed from yours - and yet your eyes have read the same words, your fingertips have traced the same lines of text, and your hands have turned the same pages.

The penultimate Thursday, when Dieter walks up to your counter, you have a book ready for him.

It’s a departure from the established routine - you usually tell him where the book is, and he goes fetch it himself. He doesn’t question you though, and instead, waits for the blurb that you always give him by way of an introduction. When you shrug wordlessly, he arches an eyebrow at you, but he doesn’t probe.

The next Thursday, you’re down with the flu and you call in sick for the day. If you’re honest with yourself, you’re relieved that you won’t see Dieter for the last time. Filming has wrapped, and you know he’s flying out this evening (there are no secrets in a small town).

Your dinner of canned chicken soup is bubbling on the stove when there’s a knock on your door. Swinging it open, you wonder if you’re high on your flu medicine.

Dieter Bravo is standing on your tiny doorstep, which is barely wide enough to accommodate his broad shoulders. He holds the book in one big hand, his ridiculous rings catching the porch lights. Something is off, and it takes you a few more moments to realise why -

He’s not wearing his sunglasses.

Warm brown eyes hold yours as he says more than asks, ‘You wrote this, didn’t you?’

His confident statement steals the breath right out of your parted lips, and you stare back at him, dumbfounded.

Not a single soul knows. You published the book under a pseudonym with a small press on the other side of the country and made enough to cover your costs, which was more than you expected. Covertly, you ordered a copy for the library, and it’s been checked out exactly three times in the last four years. It’s been sitting in its little spot, gathering dust until you took it off the shelf last week on an impulse.

You realise that Dieter is still waiting for your answer, but the words don’t come. The car sitting on the curb honks, and he smiles ruefully before pushing the book into your limp hands, and walks away without looking back.

When the SUV rounds the corner, your gaze drops to the paperback. His eyes have read the same words that you wrote, his fingertips have traced the same lines of text that you know by heart, his hands have turned the same pages you now fan through -

Something falls out of the book and you just manage to catch it before it flutters out of reach.

It’s a name card with Dieter’s cell number on one side, and on the other, in precarious handwriting that can only be his -

Wanna make a movie?

#fuckyeah2222sleepover #dieter bravo fanfiction #dieter bravo drabble #dieter bravo x reader #dieter bravo x you

553 notes · View notes

writer-freak · 7 months

Text

Distraction | Vi x gn reader

Summary: You got injured in a fight and this injury was the gateway to a confession

Warnings: Gn reader, english isn't my first language, reader gets injured, Vi teasing you a bit

Wordcount: 900

A/n: Wrote this for my bestie who is a giant Vi simp. I am terrible at writing fight scenes but I did my best for this and I hope that it's at least acceptable.

Comments, likes and reblogs are always appreciated and really motivate me to write more

The air was thick with tension, the distant hum of Zaun's machinery providing a gritty soundtrack to your fight. Vi's gauntlets crackled with energy as she exchanged blows with their adversaries. You were right there beside her, trying to hold your ground, but the underbelly of Zaun is a dangerous place.

A swing and a miss left you vulnerable, and the next thing you knew, pain radiated through your side. Staggering against a wall, your hand instinctively went to the fresh wound, feeling blood seep through your fingers. Vi from the corner of her eye saw you in distress and quickly took out the attacker in front of her.

With that person out of the way, she went in your direction, and sent your attacker flying with a powerful uppercut, then turning to you. "Hey, you okay?" Vi's voice was a mix of concern and urgency while she tried to look at the wound.

"Yeah, it's just a scratch." you muttered through gritted teeth, trying to play it cool. You still hadn't taken out all the attackers, and you didn't want Vi to look out for you while she should be concentrating on the fight.

She arched an eyebrow. "Scratch, my ass. We're taking care of this, immediately." Vi lunged back into the fight, her blows now backed with a protective rage. It didn't take long for the remaining opponents to scatter.

Then Vi returned to your side, her gauntlets powering down. "Come on, we're getting out of here." She grabbed your hand and you followed her through the dimly lit alleys before you reached a relatively quiet spot. Vi gestured for you to sit on a makeshift crate as she kneeled in front of you, rummaging through your bag for supplies.

"Let's see that 'scratch' of yours." she smirked taking your hand away from the injury. The wound stung, but Vi was careful while handling you even if there was still a certain roughness that was just a part of her. She worked efficiently, the tension of the fight slowly dissipating. Outside of the alley, you could hear the sounds of the city but at the moment you were just concentrating on looking at Vi and the concern that you could see on her face.

"So, how'd you end up with this?" Vi asked, not looking up from her task. "Lost my concentration for a bit, I guess." you replied, wincing as she tightened the bandage.

"What exactly made you lose your concentration?" she asked, slightly curious, knowing you're not typically that careless in a fight. Your face got a bit warm, remembering how you were looking at Vi during the fight for a second too long and ended up surprised by an enemy. You coughed slightly, trying to hide your embarrassment before answering. "Nothing, in particular, my head was just in the clouds…I guess." You mumbled the last part, hoping that she would just accept your explanation.

She raised a questioning eyebrow, obviously not accepting your explanation but letting it slide for just a little bit while concentrating on bandaging you up.

You would occasionally grunt, the pressure on your wound definitely uncomfortable, but you just bit through it. Finally, Vi stood up from her kneeling position, smiling satisfied at you. "So, will you tell me now why you actually lost your concentration?"

You groaned, expecting her to ask again but hoping that maybe, just maybe she would forget about it. You tried to come up with something but your head was just empty, which could possibly be from the blood loss. So you mumbled under your breath. "Well, maybe if someone wasn't so distracting in a fight, I could focus better." Then looking to the side not wanting to look at Vi right now. She leaned in closer to your face. "What was that?" She asked. You turned your head toward her, and annoyed repeated, "If someone wasn't so distracting, I could focus better."

She raised an eyebrow, feigning innocence. "Who, me? I'm just doing my thing, cupcake. It's not my fault that you can't help but look at me."

Her face was so close to yours that you could feel her breath, making you feel like you were overheating. Her expression was obviously teasing, she wanted to rile you up as much as possible, and it was slowly driving you mad.

So you took a deep breath, mustering up all the courage in you to retort. "Well, if you weren't always so captivating, I could concentrate on not getting messed up in a fight."

Vi's eyes widened, and for a moment, surprise flickered across her face. Then, a mischievous grin spread, and she chuckled, "Didn't know I had that effect on you, sweetheart." Your cheeks warmed, but you shot back with a defiant smirk, "Maybe you should pay more attention, then."

The banter continued a playful exchange of words between you and Vi. You two knew that soon you would need to get back out into the city again, involving yourself in fights, but just for now, you two were in your own little world.

divider credit: @cafekitsune

167 notes · View notes

fxtalitygod · 7 months

Text

「 𝙱𝚕𝚊𝚌𝚔 𝙲𝚘𝚏𝚏𝚎𝚎 」

Pairing: Gojo Satoru x Fem!Reader (or Afab!Reader)

Synopsis: You preferred your coffee to be black, at least you used to– Gojo Satoru changed that.

Genre: Fluff to Angst

Warnings: Fluff to Angst (Heavy angst), language, Light JJK chapter 236 SPOILERS, character death, vague imagery of mutilation (nothing overly descriptive), reader has a nightmare, depictions of a dead body/corpse, mentions of pregnancy, themes of grief, (only at the end)

Word Count: 3.9k

A/n: I wrote this mainly as a fem reader, but it can also be read as afab since the reader's pronouns are never specified.

P.S. I know it looks like someone needs to stop me from thinking of ways to write angst for Gojo after reading chapter 236...but that's only because someone needs to stop me from thinking of ways to write angst for Gojo after reading chapter 236!

JJK Mlist•Taglist Rules•

"How do you like your coffee?"

"Black."

"Black?!"

"Yes, what is that unusual?"

"No, it's just...how can you drink that?"

"I put it to my lips, and I ju-"

"I understand how the function of drinking works. I mean, how can you drink something so...bitter."

Satoru's question was more of a statement than a question, as he cringed at the thought of consuming such a bitter beverage. You and Gojo had been dating for a few months and were still getting to know each other, exploring your interests, preferences, likes and dislikes...tastes in coffee.

"Alright, how should I be drinking it?" you questioned, smiling as you watched him think before perking up as if a lightbulb had gone off in his head.

"You wanna go on a coffee date?" Gojo asked, smirking as he did so.

"Don't you think that's a little cliché?" you responded, quirking a brow at him.

"Nothing can be cliché if it's with you, my dear."

You could only laugh at his witty comment, glancing over to see him wiggling his brows as he awaited your answer.

"Alright, fine! But for future reference, try to come up with better pick-up lines than that, or I can't see this relationship lasting long." You joked as you stood from the bleachers you had been seated on.

You watched as your boyfriend clutched his chest in faux hurt, letting a theatrical gasp as he gave you a pained look. You could only laugh at his dramatic behavior, shaking your head as you stepped towards him, bending down to kiss him on the cheek. Gojo sat there accepting your offer of affection but wasn't entirely satisfied. Before you could walk away, he grabbed your wrist and pulled you down to give him a proper kiss before pulling away slightly.

"I'll meet up with you after class?" the second-year mumbled on your lips.

"If you even survive because I'm pretty sure you're late, and Yaga isn't going to be too keen on the explanation that your tardiness was due to you swapping spit with your girlfriend." you teased.

"We didn't even make out though."

"Try explaining that to Yaga," you knowingly stated.

Gojo knew you were right, sighing and cursing under his breath before standing, giving one last peck to your lips before running off, mumbling to himself as he tried to think of a reasonable excuse for his late arrival, something that would be somewhat justifiable to his instructor. You felt a warmth rise in your chest as you watched him make one last turn towards you, waving as he continued to make his way to his classroom. How did you manage to pull a guy like him? That question would forever remain a secret, but you wouldn't dwell on it– you would focus on whatever remaining time you had left with him.

"My head still hurts," Gojo murmured as he rubbed the tender spot on his scalp from where Yaga had bonked him.

"I told you," you teased in a sing-song tone, leaning towards him with a smug smile plastered on your face.

Your partner only shoved you away lightly as he tried to control the amused smile that began to grace his features before pausing. You hadn't noticed that Satoru had stopped until you turned to see he wasn't by your side anymore. You looked behind you to notice that he was staring at a display window. You couldn't see what was inside due to your current distance, but you could tell your boyfriend was definitely drawn to it.

"Is everything alright over there?" you called, tilting your head in curiosity as you stood in your current spot.

"How do you feel about going on that coffee date?" Satoru called back, looking over at you.

"Now?"

"Right now."

You hesitated for a moment, not feeling entirely comfortable going on a date in your uniform, but reasoned that it would be ridiculous to postpone a simple date based on your apparel– Satoru was still in his uniform, so why did it matter? With that internal debate out of mind, you walked toward your partner, taking his outstretched hand and walking into the coffee shop.

"You sit over there."

"Huh?" you were confused by your boyfriend's instruction, giving him a puzzled look.

"I'll go order the coffee and a few treats, don't worry, go sit over there and relax," Gojo explained, an overly enthusiastic smile plastered on his face for a guy who was going to simply put in an order for 'coffee and a few treats.'

You gave the fellow shaman a look of suspicion before walking over to a clean table, taking a seat, and watching the tall individual walk toward the counter. You couldn't hear what he had ordered due to his almost hushed tone as he spoke to the barista behind the counter. You waited a short while before being presented with your companion and all the items he had purchased.

Before you could say anything, Gojo slid one of the cups toward you, presenting it as your coffee before pulling back and staring at you. Your eyes flitted from the cup back to him a few times, feeling apprehensive as he persisted in staring at you. His awaiting gaze was a little unsettling at this point.

"What did you do to it?" you asked, pushing the beverage away.

"Nothing, just take a sip," the eager-looking individual insisted as he slid the cup back to you.

"You didn't do anything weird to this, did you? Didn't poison it or anything? I don't want to be the victim of a crime of passion case."

"No, I didn't do anything weird to it. Also, if I were to kill you, I wouldn't poison you– that would be boring," Your boyfriend answered.

"How reassuring," you stated, taking a deep breath before looking at the cup sitting idly, "Here goes nothing."

After collecting all your courage, you lifted the cup so that the rim rested on your lips, taking one last look at Satoru before taking a sip. The sweetness and thickness of the drink hit you unexpectedly, causing you to choke suddenly. You pulled the cup away from your mouth, grabbing a napkin to cough into as you registered what had happened.

"Are you okay?" Satoru spoke, trying to hide his laughter– he was failing miserably at that.

"Yeah," you sputtered, "What the hell did you put in that coffee?"

"Technically, I didn't put anything in that coffee; the barista did," your companion corrected.

"Alright, smart aleck, what did you tell the barista to put in that?" you responded, grabbing another napkin to wipe at your mouth, slowly catching your breath from the initial shock.

"Relax, I just asked her to add creamer and a few packs of sugar."

"How much do you consider is a few?"

"Uhhhh... so how was it?" Gojo redirected, deciding not to answer that question.

"It was definitely a shock," you sarcastically answered as you glared at your boyfriend.

"It couldn't have been that bad. Come on, just give it one more try, pretty please," Satoru pleaded, looking at you through his snowy eyelashes, batting them innocently.

You sighed, giving in to him begrudgingly as you brought the beverage back to your lips, pushing your hesitance to the side as you took a sip. You let the flavors rest on your tongue, tasting the sweetness of the sugar and brew combined with the thickness of the creamer that also enhanced the sweetness. The drink wasn't your preference, but you couldn't admit it was entirely dissatisfactory. If you had been the one who controlled how much sugar and creamer was added, it may have been more to your liking.

"Soooo?" your partner drew, waiting for an answer he would be satisfied with.

"It's alright, a little sweet for my liking, but it isn't god awful," you admitted, "next time, I would balance out the sugar and creamer ratio."

"So you're saying there is a next time?" Satoru teased, raising a smug brow.

You had the urge to punch the cockiness off of that ever-so-handsome face of his but decided against it as you leaned over the table and pecked his lips, catching him by surprise.

"Yeah, there is a next time."

"I'm so sorry for your loss, Y/n."

You hung up the phone, setting the device down on the nearby table as you stood in place, looking out the window, repeating the apologetic statement in your mind. What was the point of apologizing for such a loss– it won't bring anyone back; it won't mend your broken heart; it won't resolve the fact that you're standing here rubbing at your stomach, knowing that you were about to conceive a child without a father figure present, which you only figured both out recently.

You fiddled with the silver band around your ring finger before slowly sliding it off and placing it on the table next to your discarded phone. Your legs felt weak as you only stood there, staring at the window, not even looking at the lovely scenery beyond the pane– you only stared at the glass barrier that separated you from the outside world. There was a slight quiver in your breath as the events of your life played in your head. All the firsts you had with the man, all the important events you shared with him, all the tender moments. From the day you met to the day you eloped with him.

This was another day to add to your memory.

The day you created a life and the day you lost a life.

You stood there unmoving and noiseless until someone came and escorted you to your room, saying you should rest. Laying in your bed felt like torture that night, and every night after that– it was a constant reminder that you were now a widow, that you had lost your lover. When you would dream, you would dream of him, but those dreams quickly turned into nightmares. The images were vivid, as you imagined your lover's mangled body, surrounded by his own blood that had turned cold with time. Your heart would hammer against your ribs, and your breathing would grow heavy as if someone was sitting on your chest. A ringing sound could be heard the longer you looked at his corpse, crescendoing as your gaze took in every detail of the horrific sight before you.

And then you'd wake up to the sound of your own alarm.

You gasped as you sat up, waking up in a cold sweat, goosebumps littering your skin. You looked at your phone, seeing it was past the original time set, meaning you had slept through the initial alarm. Taking a moment to collect yourself, you sat there, looking at the empty side of your bed blankly; however, before you could dwell on the situation, your phone went off. You quickly reached over and looked at the caller ID, seeing Shoko's name illuminating on the screen.

"Hello," you groggily asked, not having the energy for your usual friendly greeting.

"Hey, are you sure you want to do this?"

You were puzzled by her question, but when you pulled your phone away in confusion, you noticed the date and what that meant.

"Yeah," you answered, your voice barely above a whisper.

"Alright, see you soon then..." a pause as you were about to hang up, your finger hovering over the red button, "Hey, Y/n, if I had the power to bring him back, I would...even if he was an idiot. I just wish I had that kind of power."

"Hey Shoko, it's alright. I need to get ready, but I'll see you soon," you reassured her, knowing that your husband's death was just as painful for her as it was for you.

"Right, see you soon."

With that, you used what little energy you had to press the red button and stand, heading to your bathroom to freshen up. Walking up to the mirror, you could see how disheveled you were– it was frankly ridiculous– seeing your messy hair and your sloppy choice of clothing. You scoffed as you looked at yourself, disappointed in how you let yourself go because you knew Satoru wouldn't have wanted this for you, especially in your circumstances.

You took a deep breath before exhaling, trying to push your emotions aside so you would be able to accomplish the basic necessity of taking care of yourself. This was the daily morning routine currently, waking up a sweaty mess from your night terrors before cleaning yourself to look as tidy as possible. If somebody were to ask someone close to you how you were doing, they would say you were handling it well, complimenting you on how strong you were being. Although, those people only saw you in broad daylight. When you were left in the solitude of your bedroom, you would let go of the strong composure, permitting yourself to slouch and remove the concealer from your undereye to reveal your eye bags, allowing yourself to remove the neutral expression from your face to reveal the cold, stoic one beneath it, which wasn't very flattering.

After a few hours, you stood on the border of Tokyo's Jujutsu High. It took every part of you to step past the barrier, but you managed to do it after shutting down every impulse to turn around and break for it. You walked the grounds, feeling unfamiliar with the surroundings, although you had walked through these halls more times than you could count. The atmosphere just wasn't the same.

"Over here," you heard a voice exclaim, turning to see it was Shoko, "I thought it would be best to meet up out here first."

You only nodded as you stood in front of her. The air was thick with tension as you both stood in silence. You distracted yourself by messing with the chain around your neck.

"You could always back out if you want to..." Shoko broke the silence, although in a hushed tone as if she were trying to preserve the stillness.

"I need to do this, Shoko."

The brunette looked at you hesitantly before nodding, gesturing for you to follow her. You walked through the cold hallway for about a minute before stopping in front of a door. A shaky breath escaped your lips as you stared down the hunk of metal, not knowing what to expect.

"He's already in there," Shoko spoke once more, placing a hand on your shoulder, "Look, you can leave whenever you are ready; you don't have to stay in there, and if you need me there at any point, do not hesitate to ask."

You only gave your friend a curt nod before walking through the door, letting the heavy metal shut behind you as you scanned the features of the lifeless room. It was nothing special, but if you happened to get locked in this room, you would probably go insane. Before you could distract yourself with ridiculous scenarios, you were struck with the reality of the situation as your eyes landed on the oddly shaped white cloth draped over the examination table.

Without even thinking, you approached the table, pausing just short of it as you examined the shape of the cloth. You sucked in a breath, holding it as you grabbed the corner of the fabric. There was a moment of hesitance as you gripped the material before pulling it back to reveal the lifeless face of Gojo Satoru, your beloved husband.

You didn't know what to do or say at the moment– I mean, what could you do or say when being met with your lover's cold body? However, you did have to breathe. You hadn't noticed, but when you began to feel the tightening in your chest, you remembered to allow breath into your lungs. Your dreams were nowhere accurate to the state of his current corpse, and you didn't know if you should have been disturbed or grateful for that. He wasn't horrifically mangled, but his lower half was no longer attached to his upper torso.

You looked into his cold, lifeless, blue eyes, the same eyes that used to gleam with mischief and pride. If your heart wasn't broken before, it was positively demolished at this stage. You brought your hand to hover just above his eyes before letting them touch his skin, moving them to force his eyes closed. Your hand rested there for a moment before moving to swipe away at the stray hairs that sat on his forehead.

Standing there, unmoving, you took a moment to look at your significant other, seeing his peaceful-looking expression, one you recognized from the mornings when he had successfully gotten a satisfying night of rest– now he's resting eternally; hopefully a peaceful one as your lover had always struggled with sleep. God, you wished he was just sleeping, that he would wake up and tell you it was all a sick joke, but you knew better– Satoru would never let you suffer like that. As you were about to back away and leave the room, starting to move your hands from the table, you felt something brush over your knuckles, causing you to lightly gasp.

You moved your gaze to look at what you unintentionally touched, revealing something that managed to cause your shattered heart to drop.

The sight of the ring on your lover's hand, the cold metal idly sitting on his unmoving finger.

You choked back a sob, a suppressed sound emitting from your throat as you took Satoru's limp hand, gripping it tight as your other hand found its way to his forehead, pushing back more strands of hair. You suppressed your cries as you bent down, closing your eyes, not having the heart to look at him like this anymore, as your quivering lips kissed his forehead. Your body silently shook as you continued to contain your sobs, tears escaping your eyes as you slipped the ring off his finger, placing it in your pocket.

You were in that position for some time before finally pulling away and walking out of the room before you could look at his dull state and linger any longer. Upon stepping out of the room, you were greeted by Shoko's gaze of pity– it sickened you. The last thing you wanted was to be pitied, but in predicaments such as these, you had no choice but to be pitied. So, if you were to be pitied anyway, what was the point of hiding the underlying issue?

"I'm pregnant," you blurted, watching Shoko's face drop.

"Y/n, I didn't even know, I would have never-"

You cut off Shoko as she attempted an apology for something out of her control, "How could you have known? I for sure as hell didn't until a few minutes before I got the call that my husband was dead," you weakly smiled, "At least I'll always have a part of him with me, right?" your voice shook as you sarcastically asked that question, allowing more tears to spill.

"Y/n, I-"

"Please don't apologize, Shoko. It isn't your fault that things ended up so shitty," you reassured her, placing a hand on her shoulder, "Look, I'm getting too tired considering that it's still early in the day, so I'm gonna grab a coffee, you could join me if you'd like," you offered, shrugging your shoulders as you wiped at your tears.

"Y/n, I wish I could, but I have to..." Shoko trailed as she chose her words carefully, "I need to work with him."

You gave the doctor an understanding nod, waving goodbye as you made your leave from the school. Leaving the isolated school to the city was almost refreshing as there were plenty of things to distract you from the reality of your predicament. To some, the walk may have been boisterous and annoying, but for you, it was calming and relaxing to be fixated on mundane things that didn't affect you.

That didn't last long.

Your feet stopped moving due to muscle memory of your route to your current location. You looked up to see the usual coffee joint you visited– the same one where Satoru had taken you for your first coffee date. You smiled for a moment due to the nostalgia; however, it faded quickly, remembering you weren't visiting with your usual partner. Despite the upsetting realization, you managed to hold your composure, fiddling with the chain around your neck before pulling it out from beneath your shirt, watching your wedding ring dangle from the delicate item. You took in a shuddering breath as you pulled your spouse's ring from your pocket, taking your time in slipping the metal band onto the chain to dangle next to yours before placing the necklace back around your neck, tucking it underneath your shirt once more.

"Y/n, is that you? It's been quite a bit. For a moment, I thought you found a new spot to lounge at," one of the familiar baristas chuckled before halting her laughter to look at the area around you, "Satoru isn't with you today?"

You sucked in a breath before plastering a smile onto your face and replying simply, "No."

"I see. I'll get you your usual then?" the barista asked, ready to turn away and prepare your drink before you stopped her.

"No, today I'd like it black, a plain dark roast," you replied.

A bitter drink for a bitter situation.

"Oh, alright then."

You could hear the hesitance linger in the barista's voice as she walked to the machine. It only took a couple minutes for the girl to prepare your simple order before handing it to you. Thanking the young woman, you bent down to pull some cash from your purse, coming up to see a stunned expression as she looked at your chest. Without thinking, you quickly looked down to be met with the sight of your necklace and the two rings dangling from it. Before the worker could speak, you placed the money on the counter and walked over to an isolated table– conveniently enough, it was the same table you and your husband would sit at, the one you always sat at since your first visit to this cafe.

"Yuck, how do you drink this Mommy?"

"Well, it's simple dear, you just bring the cups to your lips and-"

"I know how to drink, Mommy, but how can you drink something so icky?"

The mother lightly chuckled.

"Well, how would you have made it?"

"Hmmm...Here! Try my hot cocoa, Mommy! It is much better than that yucky drink."

"Oh, I bet it is, Sweetie."

You could hear them smiling as the mother-daughter pair giggled, enjoying their shared time, reminding you of a similar moment you shared with your lover– you were happy for them, nevertheless. Bringing the cup to your lips, you took a whiff of the dark brew, letting the scent linger for a while before taking a sip. The rich taste was almost foreign but satisfying nonetheless, at least that is what you told yourself as you slumped in your chair.

The room went eerily quiet as eyes were drawn to your form, watching as you cried into your beverage. Your shoulders shook as you sobbed breathily, putting the cup onto the table to cover your mouth to muffle your soft cries, your other hand placed gently on your stomach. You knew that they were looking at you, that you were causing a scene– it was embarrassing, but you didn't care. You had the right to grieve because god...

That coffee was so fucking bitter.

297 notes · View notes

finntheehumaneater · 8 months

Text

An Ego Thing (Part 2/???)

HELLO. I had a mini panic attack at the amount of notes on the first part of this, and then blasted Noah Kahan while I wrote this part, so PLEASE EXCUSE AN ERRORS BECAUSE IF I READ OVER IT I’LL SECOND GUESS MYSELF AND NIT POST IT.

I named this “an ego thing” after the song by Lizzie McAlpine because I love that song and I thought it fit (not really but still. I love that song so much. Music is important to me.)

a lot of you guys liked and reblogged, so let me know if you want me to tag you in the next part in the comments :)

@strangersteddierthings

Enjoy :)

—

It would’ve been better if Steve had asked anyone else to give Eddie back his jacket. Anyone but Robin Buckley. Because she was furious.

“What the fuck is the wrong with you?” She snapped, shoved the coat at Eddie so hard that he stumbled backwards and almost tripped over his own feet, his now pressed against the side of his van.

He felt all too trapped under her glare, and he did not like it all. She crossed her arms and her eyes narrowed even further—if that was even possible—and her words had far too much force behind them.

“He told me that it was a bad idea to tell everyone, and I told him that it was fine! A-and look what you did! Now he’s upset, and you need to fucking apologize to him—preferably in person—before I—“

“Robin—“ He tried to cut in, tried to explain himself, but just like with Steve, he was met with more harsh words, more furious tone—except this was more livid and less hurt.

“No, Eddie fucking Munson, you shut the fuck up and listen.” She said quietly, which made him flinch at how soft her tone sounded—yet still stinging at the same time. “If you tell anyone about this, I will fucking—“

“Robin!”

He didn’t have the guts to yell at Steve like that, and it was worse doing it at Robin, but he had spent the past two days feeling horrible, and he was done feeling like that. He took a deep breath, trying to stop his hands from fidgeting with the sleeves of the coat that he was still holding, his boots slipping slightly in the thin layer of early-snow that had already fallen, despite it only being early December.

“I-I didn’t kiss Steve because I thought it would be funny, or because I was trying to be a dick, okay? I…I kissed him because—“ He cut himself off, not knowing what he wanted to say next. He didn’t exactly know what he felt about Steve, and maybe that’s why all he could do before was leave without explanation.

He didn’t just like Steve, it was more than that. But, then again, he wasn’t sure he was ready to call it love, either. But the only way he could get Robin to not melt him into the snow with her stare was to finish his sentence, and she looked even angrier than before, considering how he had snapped at her like that, so he had to say something—

“Because what?” She whispered, her arms dropping to her side, falling against her green patterned coat as she took a step back, and it made Eddie realize that he had been staring for far too long than he thought he had, and it was probably making her feel uncomfortable.

He cleared his throat and found his hands curling into fists in the soft fabric of his coat. “Because—because I wanted to.”

Gods, he was such a fucking idiot. Because he wanted to? Of course he wanted to, but that didn’t make the situation any clearer to Robin. He needed to just say it—

“A-and I wanted to, because…”

“Because…?” She prompted, her face softening into something more like confusion as she bent down slightly to meet his eyes, her head tilted.

“Because…I…like him…” Is what he settled for, even though that didn’t feel right.

“You like him?” She said, much louder than she had been speaking before, and it was all Eddie could do not to flinch away from her, which would have resulted in his head smacking into the side of the van, seeing as she still hadn’t moved far enough away for him to step forward a good amount. Still, his hands twitched closer to him, which she seemed to take notice of.

“Oh.” Was all she whispered, lowering the volume of her voice a considerable amount, for his sake.

“Yeah.” He whispered back, looking away again. “And I didn’t mean to make him upset, or to scare him—because I would never tell anyone, I swear—but…I just don’t know how to say it to him. And now he probably hates me—“

“He—He doesn’t. He doesn’t hate you. I mean—yeah, he’s upset, but he doesn’t hate you.” She muttered, sighing. “I should’ve known you liked him, because now that you’ve told me, you have been very obvious about your feelings in the past.”

“Shit—I have? Does—does he know already?” He hated the blatantly obvious panic that was crawling into his voice, clinging onto his words like smoke.

“No, no. As much as I love Steve, he’s pretty fucking stupid when it comes to realizing stuff like this. You’re good.”

“Fuck…thank God..” He breathed, sliding down the side of the van and sitting in the snow, not even really minding the wet feeling that was seeping into his jeans, because his legs were already kind of numb, anyways.

Robin sat down in front of him, tucking the bottom of her coat beneath her so that she wouldn’t get wet when the snow on the ground melted. “Are you going to tell him? Because I don’t think he'd be upset anymore if he knew…”

The way her voice trailed off let him know that she was withholding a very vital piece of information from him, and he did not like that. “Why? What am I missing?”

She rolled her eyes and mumbled under her breath, “God, you guys are perfect for each other.”

And if that didn’t only serve to make Eddie even more confused.

“What I mean,” She continued, using her hands more like she needed to visually explain it for him to understand. Like he was some kind of child. “Steve likes you back.”

And oh, God, did Eddie feel dizzy, his head snapping up to meet her gaze, eyes wide, eyebrows pressed together. “You’re joking.”

“I never joke.”

That was a lie. But she seemed serious about this.

“So, Edward…“

“Don’t call me that.”

“Are you going to tell him?”

Eddie sighed and pulled his knees to his chest. “I don’t know if I can…”

“Well, if you do, let me know how it goes.” She said, standing up and brushing off the back of her coat.

“You—You won’t tell him, right?” Eddie said quietly, not liking how he had to look up at her, now.

“Of course not.” She said, holding out her hand to help him up, and he reluctantly took it, her skin cold and clammy from the gradually dropping temperature outside. This really was an early winter.

“Right…thanks, Buckley.” He dropped her hand as soon as he was standing up and stepped back, just wanting some time alone to process this information. Maybe a nice drive around the town with some music playing so that he could just think. “Did you walk here?”

“No, dumbass, I drove. Yes, I walked, what the fuck do you think?” She rolled her eyes again. Eddie really hated when she did that. “I’ll see you around okay? And I’m still pissed at you for running off on Steve like that. He was really upset when he called me.”

“Yeah, yeah…sorry…” He muttered—and he would’ve offered to drive her home, but he really just wanted to be alone. Just him and his music. “I’ll see you around?”

“Yeah, of course. Let me know how it goes—actually, scratch that, Steve will probably immediately call me afterwards, but—I still want your side of things!” She called, starting to walk down the road again, somehow not slipping in the ice that had formed in patches on the road, since the “snowplow” (some random ass guy with a scraper attached to the front of his pickup-truck) hadn’t bothered to spread the road-salt out evenly.

He waved goodbye and then leaned his forehead against the side of the van, giving Robin a few minutes to walk away before he got in and fumbled with a Cassette tape, before shoving it in the slot above the radio dials.

Now he just needed to figure out how to tell Steve…

#Again sorry if this is bad #I hate my writing #Just #Yeah #sorry #and sorry for any spelling mistakes/grammar errors #Sorry :(#stranger things #steve harrington #eddie munson #steddie #steddie fanfic

170 notes · View notes

lilyveselka · 3 months

Text

On Jack Bright (An Exhaustive Perspective) [Edited 2/19/2024 w/ additional evidence!]

A couple disclaimers before I start: First, this isn't an "official stance." It's an explanation of my personal views; I speak for myself alone. Second, I'm not setting out to change people's minds or moralize to them; I just want to explain & respond to some common arguments in the fan space.

Third & finally, massive content warning for explicit discussions of grooming & sexual abuse. This includes screenshots. (I assume everyone is aware of this going in, but better safe than sorry!!)

Q: Why do you care so much, anyway?

A: Not your business, but I was groomed as a teenager in a very similar manner to the whole AB situation. Ok, on to the actual questions.

Q: First things first: Was AB/Duckman a groomer?

A: Yes, pretty definitively. First of all, DMs from one of their victims (who was underage while they were in contact; AB was aware of this fact).

[ID in alt text]

Maybe anonymous allegations aren't solid proof -- of course, there are public victims, but there are also screenshots of AB themself "joking" about being a sexual predator.

Straight up saying they want nudes from 14 year olds.

With the context of the first message -- the punchline is molesting/"corrupting" people who are underage (which they've publicly stated is a fetish of theirs)

This one just kind of... speaks for itself, I think?

[And again, ID in alt text for all these.]

These aren't the only examples, by the way -- just the most blatant. AB also explicitly wrote their interest in underage girls into tales on the actual wiki. Examples include the famed list, which implied Bright shouldn't be around people underage because he would come onto them (and that's without mentioning the blatant racism on there), as well as a now-deleted tale called 'Money, Money, Money' that involved in-depth description of a 13-year-old's breasts.

[Correction: my mistake, the tale was called 'Doctor, Doctor, Doctor.' You can find it here without the overtly sexual description of a child's body — it took 8 years (!!) for AB to remove these passages. Here's the original:

Highlighted in blue is the original edit history showing the article's content. Additionally, here's AB defending this on the talk page:

In addition to this, there's also AB requesting an artist draw incestuous rape porn — personally I find this far less heinous than a lot of the other stuff they've done, but I figure it deserves a place here too.

(iamnotadamnedmonkey is AB's old Tumblr handle, sorry for the poor quality screenshot!)

All new images also have alt text.]

Q: But AB is just the author. Why is the character bad?

A: A couple reasons. First of all, the character reflects a lot of AB's sexual proclivities, including towards underage characters, as I already mentioned in the previous point.

Second, Bright's popularity gave AB their social standing within the community. There are a few chat logs where they brag about people wanting to have sexual relations with them because of their work on the SCP wiki; also, it's pretty clear that creating something popular gives you access to a lot more people who are interested in talking to you.

When you manipulate fans wanting to talk to you into sexual relationships, it's pretty clear that you have the ability to access victims because your name is out there.

Thirdly, AB used Bright's amulet as a possession kink thing and would ask for nudes that had it visible. (And, you know, they solicited a lot of regular nudes too. What a great guy, who would totally never use their platform for their own sexual pleasure...)

Q: Right, but AB's not on the wiki anymore...

A: AB's publicly-spoken victims have politely requested that the character not be used anymore. Bright was used as a tool to access, manipulate, and engage in sexual contact with fans who were young and in some cases under the age of majority. Therefore, continuing to use Bright is disrespectful to their victims. Personally speaking, I also consider it to be disrespectful towards victims of grooming and/or sexual abuse as a whole.

Q: So you think people who still use Bright are bad people?

A: No, I don't.

Like I said, I think they're being pretty blatantly disrespectful. But I'm not the arbiter of morality or the censorship bureau. People can do what they want as long as it is appropriately tagged for.

However, the fact is this: if someone is publicly continuing to use Jack Bright, then they are doing something that goes against my values -- because my values involve supporting and respecting victims of sexual abuse.

I, personally, will not be comfortable speaking to them or seeing them in my internet space, and I'll probably lose a lot of respect for them if I had any in the first place. And since I consider my community to be a group of people who reflect my personal values and beliefs, I also do not and will never consider people who use Bright to be "part of my community."

You don't have to be a bad person to be doing something wrong, and I'll level with you: yes, I think promoting a known sexual offender & ignoring the requests of their victims is, in fact, doing something wrong. That's fine! You're allowed to do stuff that's 'wrong,' I'm not your mommy and I'm not going to call the thought police on you. But you should be comfortable with the fact that you're doing something that is going to upset other people. Using Bright will and does hurt other people, and that is not something that you can ignore.

I don't think anyone should be harassed. Obviously. I've received plenty of harassment for heading the rewrite project, and it sucks no matter who you are.

But I think people should get a little more comfortable with owning their decisions, instead of trying to argue that those decisions don't actually have any weight or consequences.

Q: But I can't control using Bright! [I have an introject of Bright/I have a DA to Bright] and it's not fair to act like I'm doing something wrong!

A: Sorry. Mental illness doesn't make you exempt from your actions having an impact on the people around you. I'll probably be more understanding if it's related to a mental health issue, but, y'know.

You don't have to do it in public. If you genuinely don't want to be hurting or upsetting other people, then you should keep your discussion of the Jack Bright character to private spaces, because otherwise you're still doing the thing you were respectfully asked not to do.

(I'm a system, just for reference. I understand. It doesn't absolve you of consequences.)

Q: I don't actually care about [your feelings/the victims' feelings], so this doesn't apply to me.

A: Cool. You can very easily block me, AB's victims, and anyone else who is vocally against using Bright. That's, uh, the point of the block button.

Q: I have something else to say that you didn't put in this post.

A: If you feel like being respectful or you have a genuine question, please direct yourself to the replies/reblogs/my inbox. If you don't, then please refer to my previous response. If you're blocked so you can't contact me, then, uh... don't contact me?

Ok, that's all my points made. Have the day you deserve, and hopefully it's a good one ❤️

#scp 963 #jack bright #talkin #cw grooming

106 notes · View notes

shimmershy · 11 months

Text

There's Only One Thing Left to Say, This Time (Undertale Fanfic)

New fanfic time! When I started writing this, I got the idea mostly because 1. I've been having trouble "moving on" from things in my own life recently and wanted to try processing it through fic and 2. it was the end of the school year for me and I had been saying a lot of goodbyes, so it felt thematically relevant. I wrote almost the entire thing impulsively at like three am a couple weeks ago and really impressed myself lol.

Chara Week Day 7: Free (I know it's over, but shhhh it still counts)

Summary:

You're having trouble saying goodbye, but the thing is that you don't have to! If you keep Resetting just before it's all over, you'll never have to be by yourself again. Right? You haven't known them long, and maybe they weren't super nice at the start, but they were there for you every step of the way. They listened to you and helped you when no one else would. You can't just let them disappear… You can't. ...But you can't keep doing this forever, Frisk. You have to let me go.

Characters: Chara and Frisk

Word count: 4,763 words

(Ao3 link in reblog!)

There's only one thing left to say this time,

I hope you're fine, goodbye.

– “Goodbye” by The Altogether

It isn’t until the third True Reset that I realize what this is all about, and when I do, I feel silly for not realizing it before.

I can still feel the way the bitterness worked its way under my skin the first time you brought everyone back. Which, is actually quite impressive on your part! Seeing as I don’t have skin anymore. I suppose it worked its way under your skin, then, because you wouldn’t stop apologizing to me in your head as you made your way through the Ruins. I should have been the one apologizing to you, Frisk. It’s no business of mine what you do with your own life, and you have no business feeling my emotions for me. This connection we have can be troubling, at times.

Still, it felt like a betrayal, and you offered me no explanation, so I could not understand.

I understood a little better when you decided to stay with Toriel for a while. Despite my obvious frustration and impatience, you sat and listened to her snail facts. You let her show you that bug-hunting spot she mentioned, and you spent time helping her run errands and letting her teach you how to cook. You even got to the point where she started giving you classes, as if you planned on staying. I assumed it was sentimentality, then. Perhaps there was something about the Underground that you didn’t want to leave behind. Maybe you weren’t ready to go back to living on the surface just yet. It’s not as if I could blame you for that one.

What I didn’t notice (and what I am noticing now), was how much attention you were giving me. And well, it’s not that I didn’t notice. I was just too busy being annoyed about it, and rightfully so. Can’t the narrator of your life narrate in peace? I do not care for superfluous conversation. And that’s not even the worst of it. Frisk, you should not be so casual about sharing control of your body, That’s like, the one thing you should never have to share. Sure, it happened one time, but I only stepped in because you were so afraid, and I didn’t even realize it was happening until it was me that the spears were getting shot at. That’s different. I will not take control of your body just to eat a slice of pie. Your pity for me is insulting.

What’s troubling is that it doesn't seem to be going away.

You take your first shivering step into Snowdin (for the fourth time, I can’t help but note) without so much as a glance behind you. This time, you left Toriel with no hesitation, and I know it’s because you know I didn’t want to stay. You’re not even trying to hide it. This is when I finally decide it’s time to confront you.

What are you doing? I ask.

“I’m…walking?” you respond, confused, through thoughts. Your boots crunch satisfyingly through the snow to prove your point. Crunch, crunch, crunch. I huff in frustration.

Frisk. Why do you keep Resetting?

This stops you (and your crunchy boots) in your tracks, and suddenly I can feel anxiety radiating off of you. You weren’t expecting me to ask you this directly.

When you don’t respond, I continue, a little bit of venom coating my words despite my best efforts. For the third time now, you have made it to the end, broken the barrier, only to start all over again. Do you not feel even the slightest bit of remorse?

“Of course I feel bad!” you’re quick to say, as if you’re surprised I would assume otherwise. “But…we’ll still get there again in the end; it’s not that big a deal.”

That’s a horrible excuse.

“Why’re you so angry about it?” Your voice comes out sharp in the frigid air.

Why are you so stubborn?

“What’re you even talking about?!”

You’re trying to delay the inevitable.

You’re about to debate me on that, too, in a defensive way rather than a genuinely angry way. But you stop, because you suddenly understand that I understand, and the anxiety returns. You continue walking after a brief hesitation.

Goodbyes are never easy, I say, as gently as I can. (It ends up sounding forced anyway.)

You ignore me, and I allow you to.

~~~

What are you going to do once you get back to the surface? Once you decide to stay?

You’ve made it to Waterfall at this point, having made it through Snowdin without much event. You’re getting a little tired of doing the same thing every time; I can tell, but you would never admit to it.

You kick a stone on the ground, watching as it disappears into the dark grass. “I dunno.” (“I dunno-”) (“-dunno-”)

Your own voice travels around you in echoes and fragments. You really shouldn’t talk out loud like this in the middle of all these echo flowers. Number one, it’s annoying, and that should be reason enough, but number two, you shouldn’t make a habit of talking out loud to the voice in your head at all. People are going to think you’re weird. And I mean, you’re already pretty weird, but do you really want the reputation of “the weird kid who talks to themself” stuck to you even after I’m gone?

I didn’t even realize you were listening to all that, but you flinch at that last part, not only mentally but physically too, and I try to ignore the fact that you’re proving my point.

I hum thoughtfully. You “don’t know”? That’s certainly an issue then, isn’t it?

You start to fidget with the hem of your sweater and return to talking to me through thoughts, much to my relief. “I just haven’t thought much about it.”

This is a lie. But I don’t point that out to you.

You’re in a part of Waterfall that you’ve never seen before. Admittedly, it’s not much different to the parts you have seen before, but the fact that it’s new at all is good enough for you. You’re trying to explore the area as much as you can this time around, because you’ve realized just how expansive Waterfall really is and the curiosity you came here with the first time still hasn’t left you. You’ve barely seen a fraction of the place, and you definitely won’t manage to see all of it, but you’re certainly going to try.

I might take this time to remind you that no matter how many times you’ve befriended her in the past, Undyne is still hunting you down in this timeline. So maybe taking the time to look at every blade of grass there is to look at isn’t the best idea. But whatever.

There are quite a few echo flowers growing in this area, as I mentioned before. It seems more secluded than the rest of the caverns that make up Waterfall, if that’s even possible. You can see the main path you usually walk from where you’re standing, separated from you by a large expanse of luminescent cyan water, and an overwhelming sense of calm washes over you. It’s like this is a little cove carved out just for you, safe from everything that may hurt you. It’s hard for me not to feel the same sense of calm. Whether it’s just the spilling over of your emotions or completely and entirely mine is hard to tell, but it doesn’t really matter.

Why don’t we sit here for a minute? I ask. You let out a breath and descend to the ground, hugging your knees and resting your head against the rough cavern walls without hesitation, as if you were waiting for me to say just that.

It’s nice to just be here, for me, with you, like this. Together. Your hands are intertwined in the way that I know means you’re trying to hold my hand, in whatever way you can. We look out at the stillness of the water, listening to the sound of rushing waterfalls in the distance. We both must be thinking about the same thing, now, because although I don’t agree with the Resets, I understand why you don’t want to leave, to some extent. Have you convinced me that you’re right? Have I felt this way the entire time and simply didn’t realize until now? I can’t say for certain. But I’m becoming increasingly aware of my own fear of reaching the end.

“Chara?” you say, voice cracking a little. The sound of my name spoken aloud and echoed around by the echo flowers startles me. “It’s just that…I really, really don’t wanna be by myself again.”

I feel tears pricking at your eyes. The honesty in your voice stings.

You won’t be by yourself, I try halfheartedly. Everyone will be up there with you.

You reposition to rest your head on your knees. “You know what I mean,” you whisper, and after a moment you say. “You’re not gonna be there.”

…Right. Of course.

That is the funny thing about good things, see. About journeys and stories. And lives. They end. Sometimes (always) too soon.

I do not know what I was expecting the first time you made it to the surface. What, was I just going to live inside your head forever? Would you want that? Would I? The strangest thing happened when you stepped over that threshold where the barrier once stood, when everyone else followed you out. I felt you pull away from me, and then I watched the back of your head as you walked out into the sun. It was a bit disorienting. I wasn’t seeing through your eyes anymore, I was just…there. Watching. Barely even there, because I couldn't feel you there justifying my existence anymore.

I don’t think there was a doubt in either of our minds about what that meant. As everyone else chatted in awe of how beautiful the sun was, you looked back at me (although I don’t think you really saw me, just the empty opening of the cave). There was confusion, or sadness, or panic on your face. I’ve never had to read your face from the outside before, what a funny thing to realize. Whatever emotion it was, it was enough to make you Reset. And then again, and again. It really was for my sake, then.

This makes me feel a strange mixture of things, but the feeling of guilt sticks out like a sore thumb. Frisk, I don’t want you to feel any sort of…obligation? Or anything? To keep me alive. I’ve been wanting to be dead for a long time.

It’s a lame attempt at humor to lighten the mood, but as soon as I think it, I realize how unfunny it sounds. It kind of stops being a joke when it’s true.

Still, you reply, “It’s not like that. You know that.”

You are making some awfully bold assumptions here, though they’re not entirely false. I’m inclined to ask, what is it like then? Would moving on with your life not be the best option here? Everything is going to work out for you. And, hey, you won’t even have to put up with an annoying ghost in your head anymore.

“What if I like the annoying ghost in my head?”

Well, then you’re weird. But we’ve already established that.

That gets a smile out of you. “See? You always make me feel better,” you think, and I want to roll my eyes at that. I want to remind you of all the times I made you feel worse rather than better, but I stay quiet for now.

“…Before I came here,” you start, eyes trained on the ground as you fidget with the grass there, “I was alone a lot. It wasn’t so bad, but…it wasn’t so good either.” You shrug one of your shoulders. “I dunno. I didn’t think about it much. I had to take care of myself, and there was never anyone there…to say it’d be okay, or to tell me dumb jokes, or just be there…y’know?”

Yeah. I do know.

…

“I kinda panicked when I left the Underground and you weren’t there. You were just…gone, and I didn’t know what to do. I didn’t even really mean to Reset, I just didn’t think, and I-“

You sigh.

“I just really care about you. You’re like my best friend, Chara- ‘N that’s what it’s like. It’s like saying goodbye to your best friend.”

Oh.

Ha ha. Yes, I really do know that, don’t I?

“Wait, augh. I-I probably shouldn’t’ve said it like that, I’m sorry-“

No, Frisk, there is no need to apologize. It is fine. It’s fine.

Your fingernails claw into the grass and the dirt beneath.

I know. I know what you mean. I really do.

I try not to think of my brother. I fail.

I did not think you would care so much. It’s- (stupid), I want to say, but you are not stupid. (See, caring about me always gets people hurt), I want to say, but that’s not your fault. (What did you expect?), I want to say. (I don’t believe you), I want to say. (I don’t understand you), I want to say. I can’t- I can’t say any of that. I can’t say anything to you, right now.

You- you nod, a little concerned, but you give me space. You bring your hands together again and gaze out at the water again for a minute. Then, finally, you decide to continue onwards. You have a fish monster to face.

~~~

Being here doesn’t get easier, no matter how prepared I am after each Reset. The grey, achromatic walls and floors. The feeling of despair in the air. The stillness. It directly contrasts my memories of warmth and color and love in this home. It reminds me too much of dust.

I stay quiet as you kneel in front of the save star. It glows in a steady, consistent way, light flowing out from the center and disintegrating at the edges. A comforting feeling washes over you, as it always does, and you step into the house.

It’s as lonely as ever. You should just get this over with. The monsters that are always here to greet you at this phase of your journey stop you on your way to the kitchen.

“A long time ago, a human fell into the Ruins,” one of the Froggits begins. You stand there with your hands clasped together and listen politely, as you always do. I put up a mental barrier between myself and the world and try not to listen, as I always do.

The key on the kitchen countertop glints in the other room. You wait for the Froggits to finish speaking before grabbing it and returning to the hallway. You make your way to the far end of the hall to grab the second key, too, before entering my old room.

You open the gift boxes and take the locket and dagger out without a word. I relish the familiar weight around your neck as you reach back to fasten the locket’s clasp. It helps me find the words I want to say.

Frisk. I don’t want to keep doing this.

You’re surprised to hear me speak, but you listen.

What we talked about earlier… It’s not that I don’t want to stay. I think…you’ve helped me a lot too. And I’m really glad I met you. I’m just tired of feeling stuck in the past. A part of me…wants that, but. It hurts, being here but not being able to do anything. To fix anything.

Plus, I mean. You!! The barrier’s broken thanks to you! You and…Asriel, of course. At least, it will be. Again. It’s… I’m glad it worked out in the end. Even if it took a really long time.

I wish things could be different. I wish I could stay, at least a little longer, but I don’t want to take this away from them. Or from you. I made my choice a long time ago, and this is already more than I deserve.

…

Are you…crying?

You’re holding your arms around yourself, as well. What is this???

“A hug,” you say through thoughts, sniffling.

Oh.

“I’m sorry for making you feel like that.”

It’s not your fault.

“I shouldn’t’ve kept Resetting, though. I knew it upset you the first time…”

I understand why you did it now, though. It’s okay, really.

“Okay…”

You rub your eyes with your sleeve and stand up, giving yourself a self-assured nod.

“Don’t worry. This will be the last time.”

~~~

When it’s time to fight Asriel, we’re both filled with determination. The nothingness surrounding us erupts in color and light, illuminated by kaleidoscopic starbeams and glimmering stardust. Attacks rain down on you from above, and you weave your body between them masterfully. You can’t evade them all, but I’m there cheering you on. A blast from Shocker Breaker shatters your soul; I reach out to press the pieces back together. But it refused!

Asriel floats above you, smirking with confidence in his power. You aren’t afraid of him anymore. You know all too well what he’s capable of, but you know him better now than you did when you first encountered him, just a human and a flower with a million untold secrets between them. He’d laid all his puzzle pieces out before you, and you can’t help but see the whole painful picture before you now. He’s stuck in a cycle, much like you but nothing like you at all. You’re going to help him bring it to an end. (Once and for all.)

The attacks keep coming, but you persist. You reach out to your friends within Asriel’s soul and remind them of who they are. Undyne, whom you admire for her enthusiasm and sense of justice. Alphys, whose intelligence and desire to do better inspire you. Papyrus, whom you enjoy hanging out with for his optimism and dedication. Sans, who tells you jokes that make you laugh and whose laid-back attitude puts you at ease. Toriel, who cares for you as her own child and made you feel safe when you first found yourself in this unfamiliar place. Asgore, whose presence is both comforting and sad, knowing of the difficult decisions he’s had to make in his life. Once you’ve reached out to all your friends, there’s only one thing left to do.

It seems that there’s still one last person that needs to be saved.

So you reach out to Asriel. And I do, too. He’s not the same as he was all those years ago, when we were just two kids playing in a muddy flower garden, and neither am I. But it’s still him, despite everything. He resists…and he’s still crying out to you as if you’re me. It hurts. I watch him do this every time, desperately latch on to the belief that I’m not really gone, and the ironic thing is that I have been here the whole time.

“I’m not ready for this to end,” he says, confident façade cracking.

It ended a long time ago.

“I’m not ready for you to leave,” he says.

I know.

“I’m not ready to say goodbye to someone like you again…”

…

“So, please…” His voice shakes, laced with despair. “Stop doing this… And just let me win!!!”

He raises his arms and summons all his magic for one final attack. Your vision is overwhelmed with color as the blast hits you, and you barely register the way he screams at you to stop holding on as your HP drops, with each passing second, to an impossibly low number. But it never reaches zero. You don’t die; your soul doesn’t shatter, because you’ve made it this far and you’re not about to give up now.

Finally, the world grows silent as the sound of magic rushing past your ears subsides. You’re exhausted, though Asriel is barely even paying attention to you anymore. He closes his eyes. Suddenly he seems so small inside his godlike form, too small to really be the Absolute God of HYPERDEATH.

“I’m so alone, Chara…” he says. “I’m so afraid…” They’re echoes of words I’ve already heard him say three times before, but they feel like acid nonetheless because it’s my fault and I’m the reason he’s like this, but you firmly tell me that it’s not. I don’t know if I can believe you, but I lean into you and try not to say anything more.

…

The world fades to black, and Asriel stands before you, looking the way I remember him once again. He’s covering his face, wiping away his tears and probably trying to hide the fact that he’s crying, too. He always was a crybaby, wasn’t he?

“I always was a crybaby, wasn’t I, Chara?”

Ha. Indeed.

He pauses for a moment, a thoughtful expression on his face. “…I know. You’re not actually Chara, are you? Chara’s been gone for a long time.”

You open your mouth to protest, but… Come on, Frisk, I can’t do that to him. Not after all that.

“But… Are you sure?”

I’m not… I am not here to stay. It would be a mistake to get his hopes up.

You twist your fingers together, disappointed, but you close your mouth anyway.

I’m only half-listening as he continues, asking for your name (which you have given him three times already) and apologizing for his actions. This is the last time I’m going to see him, is it not? He will break the barrier, and then you will go to the surface with everyone else. And I… Well, I don’t actually know what will happen to me. I won’t be able to come with you. I know that, at the very least. It looks like it might really be the end for me. I don’t know how to feel about that.

You tell him you forgive him, as you do every time. It seems only fair to you, after everything he’s gone through. A part of you understands him, even though most of you doesn’t, and you hope the knowledge that somebody in the universe forgives him gives him some solace. He smiles at you sadly.

He can’t stay, he tells you. With a deep breath, he closes his eyes in concentration. The human souls gather around him as he rises into the air, hovering around him in a circle, and the monster souls follow suit, glowing in the darkness. With the combined power of the human souls and every monster soul in the Underground, each pulsing with the same desire…the barrier is finally broken.

It’s over. There’s a weighty sense of resolution to it now. I don’t want you to Reset again. I know you won’t.

I stare at Asriel through your eyes as he lowers to the ground again, head tilted down, eyes closed. He looks so tired. He tells you that he needs to go, that you should go be with the people that care about you. You should just forget about him, he says. As if that would be possible.

Every word feels like a countdown, and I want to do something, but I can’t move. I need him to forget about me. I can’t be here messing everything up. I don’t…want him to forget me. But I don’t want him to hurt remembering me. I don’t want to stay here… I don’t want to go.

You hug Asriel. To my surprise, your arms tighten around him as you allow me to slip into control. “Just for a minute,�� you think. The feeling of warmth and his sweater under my fingers and my chin on his shoulder hits me so suddenly that I can’t stop my tears from running down your face. I relax into the hug, though. I close my eyes and try to forget where we are and what we’ve been through. I don’t want to let go…

When he finally pulls away, he gives me a weird look, but it’s gone in a moment.

“I’ll miss you,” I say without thinking.

He laughs. “Please don’t.”

And just like that, he’s gone again.

“You okay?” you ask as you slip back into control. Your presence is comforting beside mine in your mind.

I am, I say. Yeah.

~~~

Outside, clouds drift lazily across the sky, a beautiful gradient from lilac to yellow to frame the setting sun. Over the edge of the mountainside, you can just barely see the tops of trees stretching out into the distance, leaves tousling gently in the breeze. Tall buildings silhouette the sky on one side, and on the other, more mountains.

The light streams in through the exit to the Underground, of which you stand behind. One of your hands is cupped over the other in front of you, and you run your fingertips over the knuckles absently. You have been standing here for a while, hesitant.

Congratulations, partner, I start in an attempt to ease the tension, you’ve saved everyone once again.

“We did,” you correct. “And Asriel.”

Of course. And now, think about it. Everyone is free for real. They can see the sun, the sky, the stars… There’s a whole future ahead of them. And you get to be a part of it. That’s amazing, is it not?

“Mhm…”

You could stay with Mom. She would make you breakfast in the morning, read you bedtime stories at night. I bet Undyne would be willing to teach you some sick fighting moves. Anime nights with Alphys.

“I could hang out with Sans and Papyrus.”

Yeah! You could learn how to make music with Napstablook. That might be fun. And Mettaton might need some help becoming a star on the surface, too.

You giggle. “I think he’s got that covered.”

Maybe. I smile along with you. But, aren’t you excited? Not everything will be easy, but you have so many people supporting you.

“I know…” You sigh through your nose. “You deserve all that too, though; it’s not fair.”

Hey. The lilac is disintegrating from the sky, fading into a deep orange. Some of the wind makes it into the cave, crisp air whistling through the doorway and cooling your skin. Hey, you know what? It’s worth it. It’s okay.

I think there are tears in your eyes again. Come on, please don’t cry.

I can’t stay here forever. I’m already overstaying my welcome, being dead and all. I was supposed to be gone a long time ago, but…I got to meet you by some miracle, and that makes it all worth it, I think. Even if I can’t stay.

“Charaaa…”

I laugh a little. Don’t worry about me, Frisk. Really. I couldn’t have asked for anything more.

You hug yourself- “Hug you,” you correct. Oh. Okay. You hug me, and I, try to hug you back? It’s a little bit awkward, but I appreciate it all the same. The emotional vulnerability is starting to make me uncomfortable, but I need you to know I care about you. I know you’ll be okay.

Ha ha, this goodbye stuff is pretty hard, huh?

“Goodbye,” you say simply, with a teasing smile.

Oh, not so hard for you, it seems. Well then, “goodbye” to you, too.

I pause. …And good luck out there, partner. I think Asriel said it best: take care of everyone for me, okay? Even him.

You nod and give me a shaky little thumbs up. That’s the spirit! (Pun always intended.)

With a glance over to the others, who are in the other room, chatting amongst themselves and waiting for you, you decide you’re finally ready to go. You let everyone know, and the excitement in the room is palpable as you all make your way to the exit. They make a fuss out of you, ruffling your hair and smiling back at you. You let them leave first, and then at last, you step over the threshold yourself. I feel our connection sever.

And then I’m watching the back of your head as you walk away again. Before you reach the others though, you turn around to give me a small wave.

That’s it, I guess… I can’t exactly wave back, but I wish you well and thank you for everything. Together, you and I allow time to continue on.

#chara week #chara week 2023 #they're not in the cover art but the fic is mostly about them and Frisk so #undertale #safeutdr #chara dreemurr #frisk dreemurr #fanfiction #undertale fanfiction #fanfic #my writing #my art #chara #frisk #undertale frisk #undertale chara #🌼#also in reference to what I wrote at the beginning of the post. I wrote that a couple weeks ago. when I THOUGHT I would finish this #but of course I procrastinated on writing the last scenes so now I'm posting it quite a bit after the school year ended. oh well #still thematically relevant #writing is hard for me /except/ when I impulsively write at 3am and realize I've gotten to 2000 words without really trying. apparently. :I #also as a sidenote. this is just a one-off 'what if' scenario for me because the idea of chara not being able to come with frisk to #the surface makes me sad so. :(#sidenote number two. HOW did this become longer than Thunderstorms dude....... that was not intentional.

265 notes · View notes