#i mean i also assume that all women are straight too and i just happen to make friends with bisexual women because theres just something
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BITTERSWEET
synopsis: it's routine— you patch up his wounds and watch them heal, he salts your wounds but doesn't stick around long enough to watch them grow.
wc: 2.7k
pairings: jaemin × fem!reader
genre: angst, fluff
warnings: mentions of violence, blood, uses of petnames, reader ogles at jaemin for a little while, jaemin gives mixed signals but also not really?
notes: I was supposed to post this last week but the formatting was so off anyways happy renjun day, here's a jaemin fic?
even when he was battered, bruised and most probably broken, na jaemin stared up at you with those shiny eyes, almost iridescent under the moonlight.
you havent seen him in weeks.
you'd like to kick and scream and shout at him for ghosting you all this time, the possibilities of everything that could've happened to him, worrying you endlessly up until now.
you hate him for just showing up like this, out of the blue, you think, but his composure suggests that this isn't as big of a deal as you make it out to be—whether it was weeks or maybe even months later, na jaemin would always circle back to you
like always, there he is stood at your doorstep at an ungodly hour of the night, dripping blood all over the welcome mat that lays on your front porch, his usual carefree self
you know you'll be getting a long scolding from your mother about the kind of company you surround yourself with the next morning, before being forced to rub the stains out of said mat, but in this moment, you couldn't seem to care less
perhaps it's because you swear you've never seen anything prettier, even with cuts littered across his skin, and a swollen eye that would certainly discolour the next morning, he looks ethereal.
for a moment, your jaw hangs low and jaemin holds back a chuckle at the sight, though you wish he hadn't, before you slip to the side and let him in, shutting out the cold as he flings the door to a close behind him, finally turning to face you
jaemin however, had always basked in the warm feeling of admiration that came with your look, though it mostly fell straight through his heart and inflated his sky high ego instead, jaemin wonders how despite his cocky nature you seemed to welcome him all the same
there's an unfamiliar sweetness to his scent tonight, his clothes oozing with the smell of cologne and what any sane person could recognise as perfume— women's perfume.
suddenly you find it difficult to keep looking at his stupidly pretty face, almost feeling sick
admittedly tonight your eyes hold a deeper gloominess to them, bloodshot, because you're tired, he tries to convince himself, but he knows a lot of that redness comes from the purple painted splodges against his skin, the bruises that burn deep inside his being— a burning that seems negligible at the sight of you
"cute slippers" he whispers, the sight of your fluffy pink hello kitty slippers causing the heat to rush to your cheeks
the embarrassment fades just as quickly as it seemed to have taken over your entirety— jaemin had seen a lot worse of you "almost as cute as you" he adds
you brush over the topic like it means nothing, frankly it doesn't, like most things with jaemin
"judging by the state of you" you sigh, two hands on your hips as you look him up and down disappointedly, "you didn't win this fight" and jaemin reels back, far too animated for you to assume he's actually in any pain considering the offended expression he wears, but you know him far too well to fall for his, admittedly convincing, acts
"I won, actually" he says weaving his arms through the gaps between yours to pull you closer, letting then hang at your waist
"sure you did" you nod sarcastically but he only rolls his eyes, following you into the kitchen
he knows what it means when you hold out two mugs, specifically the ones you had hand painted on your trip to the park when you were 5, adorned with the same floral pattern in different colours, and a cheesy quote continued across the two cups— his eyes light up
"hot chocolate?"
and jaemin hates hot chocolate, until its made by you, the sweet, almost childish drink something he could only savour in the dim lighting of your living room
maybe it was because of that specific brand of crazy expensive hot chocolate you used, that tasted a little dark and sometimes too strong for your liking, or maybe, most probably it was the taste of nostalgia that would linger on his lips each and every time
all jaemin knows is he would find himself laughing at the moustache of marshmallow fluff that would undoubtedly form over your upper lip as you carefully dabbed against his wounds with the antiseptic you kept on hand, one reserved solely for him since he was allergic to the regular stuff
he nods, attempting to grin before pulling his lip between his teeth at the sharp pain that strikes across it—hissing.
you laugh, despite the dull ache that takes over your chest seeing him like this
flicking your head over to the sofa is all you can do, worried your voice would give way if you gave the instructions verbatim but jaemin seems to get the memo.
as he takes a seat on your mother's favourite buttoned yellow velvet loveseat— you choose not to read to far into his choice of sofa
you're fishing through the drawers of your freezer to find some ice to help his wounds but all you can find is a bag of dino nuggets and a bag of peas— you decide the dino nuggets have a larger surface area and would probably be a little more help as you emerge through the kitchen door, hoping you made the right choice
jaemin finds the faint look of contemplation on your face far too adorable to hide the smile that reaches his now coloured cheeks, one darker than the other owing to the bruise that blossoms over it
"here" you offer it out to him wrapped in a towel, having learnt from your mistakes the last time you'd accidentally given him freezer burn
"gonna make me do it all by myself doll?" you shoot a questioning look his way "I'm all ache-y"
contrast to his tough demeanor, jaemin looks up at you with a pout and a look of feigned innocence
"yeah? well you should've thought about that before landing yourself in this situation"
you're ready to turn a full 180 on your heels and walk away, until jaemin's fingers wrap around your wrist, bruised knuckles begging for some sympathy
"please?"
ultimately you give in. you knew you would the second he looked at you with those shiny big eyes. you didn't know how to say no, not to him
"fine."
"that's my girl" he beams up at you, you know better than to let his words replay in your mind, his girl, why did that sound so damn good?
as your press the towel to his cheek, the cool feeling against his burning hot skin makes him wince, though you're not sure who's in more pain considering the way you your heart threatens to leap out of your chest
"how many times do I have to tell you to be more careful huh jaemin" you sigh, rubbing circles against his warm skin in an attempt to comfort him, angry eyes latched onto the rough blood stained patches
"don't call me that" his voice drops an octave somehow louder than before despite coming in whispers
"what else shall I call you? is that not your name jaemin?"
his eyes almost flash over completely black as he huffs, "not to you it isn't" and you notice the slither of seriousness that remains unmasked beneath his playful tone— you wonder why jaemin makes no effort to hide the solemnity of his words
but that's who he had always been, hot and cold, difficult to read, even more so to understand, he was confusing at best and so like most things with jaemin, you'd decided putting much thought to it wasn't your best idea, you would only be breaking your own heart.
"oh I didn't know it was different for me" you place a band aid against his wound, reaching to treat the next, your tongue poking out from between your lips causing jaemin to suddenly smile, eyes unwavering from the soft pink skin of your lip
between nights spent in his lousy apartment, cooped up in the illusive comfort of his arms and days spent with tear stained cheeks at the thought of being some disposable little thing in his life, you can't help but find yourself unsure of your place in his life
the acidity rising in your throat should be enough of a reality check for you to know the answer to your question, but self awareness had never been your strong suit.
at times he made you feel like the only girl in the world, most times he made no effort to acknowledge your existence, because jaemin was a man of two extremes
when he cared, or at least seemed to, he did so with his whole heart, and when he didn't— well you couldn't have felt any more worthless
right now his speech is sweet, like his voice is honey and his words are sugar-coated, you're intoxicated by the way his deep cologne overwhelms your senses, making your best attempt to filter out the cheap feminine scent that seems to have blended itself into his
"you know it is doll, everything is different with you" his voice reduces further into deeper whispers, words that hit your mind and soul all at once, heartbeat sounding somewhere in the background as the words echo in your mind
you shake your head.
jaemin had always been adventurous with his words, he was bold to say the least, meaning you knew to take his words with a pinch of salt, or two— however many were necessary really.
drunk on what little love he gave you, you find a sudden dizziness overwhelm you— the good kind that makes you feel warm and fuzzy inside even if just for a moment.
honestly speaking, you know you'd believe anything that came out of his mouth— na jaemin could wake up one day and decide the sky was pink and the earth was flat and you'd take it as bible.
you suppose it's just integrated into your genetic coding or something, to be at his beck and call, to let the walls you build around yourself fall down every time, you would protect yourself from the whole world, but the harsh truth was, you couldn't protect yourself from him ,though you didn't mind all that much.
"one of these days I'll leave you at the door to rot" your eyes roll at his words in an attempt to return to the playful mood, and jaemin knows you would never, but the brief mention of the possibility still makes him gulp, sound resonating in his ears
"never" he whispers, suddenly his eyes are glossy and his grip on the warm mug begins to loosen, the thought of losing you never having been one to cross his mind until now, you however, seem as unbothered as before
similar to most things in life, jaemin took you for granted.
but that was the thing, you were unlike anyone, anything, any part of his life— you were special.
jaemin knew you meant a lot to him, it wasn't a secret he tried to hide, not that he was particularly good at expressing it either, but the way your hair falls over your face as you concentrate on patching up his injuries and your skin glows under the dim light has jaemin wondering just how much you mean to him.
jaemin decides you mean the most to him, more than anyone else.
as a man of habit, he wonders what that would mean for these habits of his that you hated oh so much. very little, most probably. he had you amongst a thousand other wrapped around his finger, cast under his spell, deeply infatuated with him but somehow playing with you felt the most special.
that was the problem, you were special to him and as much as he enjoyed playing with fire, jaemin had never thought he'd find himself getting burnt.
you don't realise the silence that befalls the room, nothing but the soft buzz of the fridge or the flicker of the soon to fuse kitchen light mixed with your soft breaths— he had noticed they grew louder as you became more exhausted, guilt beginning to settle somewhere in the pit of his stomach, knowing he was keeping you awake
he was always a little selfish when it came to you, he knew that
your eyes land on jaemin, his flooding with something you can only hope is a feeling of warmth— anything but his usual sudden switch up before he'd announce he was leaving, only for you to see him the next time he got himself like this, a couple nights into the next week most probably, a routine you can't say you had appreciated, nor condoned
most things with jaemin were like this, short lived, and bittersweet, although the bitter part seemed more overpowering at times
you can't help but hold onto the little slither of hope that tonight will be different
"hey doll" his free hand cups your cheek, forcing your noticeably distant eyes into his—but instead of the icy cold stare you expect, you're met with fire, his eyes burning with promise
"hmm?" your eyes lock, "what's up?"
"never stop nagging at me, please" he sucks in a harsh breath, hoping you'll say something to stop him from completely losing control of his words and spilling every thought he's ever held back when it came to you, a lot really
but you only take a sip of the warm drink in your mug, the tones of dark cocoa and the traces of coffee so distinct.
the white foam spreading across your lip as you now decide to tend to the gash beneath his eyebrow, though jaemin sees it as an excuse to take ahold of your face between his fingers, thumb tracing over your upper lip
"cute" your wide eyes make him chuckle, noticing a small speck of white still resting on your lip
"would you look at that, I missed a spot" you find yourself being pulled further into his lap, legs messily sprawled across the couch along with his, you don't mind however, his pink glossy lips the only thing on your mind
you'd like to let him ruin you, make you his puppet, blind you with his warmth and make you his and only his. even if you were his little plaything, it didn't matter, nothing mattered as long as you were his.
"and what are you going to do about it nana, hmm?"
you let your nose rest gently against his, soft vanilla scent mixing with the deep musky cologne jaemin wore, you wonder how it manages to last throughout the day considering your perfumes lasted all of 5 minutes, at best
"whatever you'd like doll, just say the word and I'll do it"
"you promise?"
jaemin nods, "I promise" and he holds you tight, because like all things good in life, jaemin knows one day, he'll lose you too
as you pout your lips at his, a knowing smile in his eyes , the first aid box is long forgotten behind you and your lips fall atop each other, like they'd always meant to.
you can't help but wonder how long jaemin will stick to this promise of his, forever you hope, though you know better.
especially when his hot cocoa flavoured kisses, like the true essence of jaemin, were so damn bittersweet.
#nct#nct dream#nct dream fluff#nct jaemin#nct dream jaemin#nct x reader#nct x female reader#nct x y/n#nct x oc#nct x you#nct dream x y/n#nct dream x oc#nct dream x you#nct dream x reader#nct imagines#nct imagine#nct fluff#nct dream fic#nct dream imagines#na jaemin#jaemin x y/n#jaemin x reader#jaemin x you#jaemin#jaemin fluff#jaemin angst#nct dream angst#nct angst
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Wondering your thoughts on something.
There are these questions floating around like the one you reblogged, of the flavor 'can [identity] [do something that is seemingly contrary to the dictionary definition of identity]?'
Do you think there's ever value to engaging with these conversations?
I ask because I think at some point, for myself, I was wrestling with 'can someone be straight and be with a non-binary partner' and there are layers to a question like that:
1. Can I maintain the stability and comfort and safety of my label despite who I love
2. Can I respect the identity of the person I love without changing my label
3. Is there some value to changing my label or keeping it
4. If I don't change my label but I feel queer can I still belong to a supportive community
5. [Externalized gatekeeping bullshit]
And I know the easy answer is, who cares do whatever.
But when you're in it, that's not an answer that feels productive. Like if I could have just done whatever without consequences I would have, but the consequences of deviating from or refusing to deviate from a strict definition felt very material.
Actually engaging with a sort of reckoning for stuff like that feels helpful. Reaching out to the queer community, seeking others who have wrestled with that question and found success, seeking validation in being strange that goes beyond 'everyone can do anything forever', I see the value in it. That's the community we're supposed to be cultivating, no? That's part of the support part, isn't it? Sharing experiences?
But I also see the value in saying, 'you gotta figure this shit out on your own,' because sometimes you gotta do that. I did. And my answer changed over time. It's just a very lonely process. And when we go through it ourselves it's easy to say, I did it, you can/should too. But then aren't we sitting at the whole 'I paid student loans so how dare they forgive student loans' mentality? Aren't we supposed to be making things easier?
All this to ask, isn't it better to engage with these questions in good faith than to assume it's gatekeeping bullshit? For the people it might help? Is 'you're fine, figure it out for yourself, don't worry about other people' actually engaging it in good faith?
I guess to me the issue is less that I'm against self introspection or that I'm assuming it's gatekeeping bullshit as like. what do you mean, "can x do y?" ? they're already doing that.
"can lesbians use he/him pronouns?" "can aseuxals have sex?" "can transmascs use the word tranny?" "can bisexual women call themselves lesbians?" "can you be trans without dysphoria?" "can a straight person be in a relationship with a nonbinary person?"
like... yes. of course they can. who's going to stop them? all of those things are in fact already happening and have been happening for longer than you can imagine. and the world kept turning. go drink a lemonade about it or something.
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The Albatross decoded
(as requested by @asteracaea's anon, just wanted this for my records too. I hope you see it)
It starts with 'Wise men once said' so immediately we know it's some old white men wisdom, so probably some BS... "Wild winds are death to the candle" isn't a saying I've heard before but English is also not my first language. I'd take it to mean a wild unruly person will destroy something delicate and fragile, just like a strong wind will blow out a candle. As warnings are being issued here, I assume that they are warning the person about this woman because she's known for being a 'wild wind'. The warning then continues into the 'Rose by any other name...' line. Just to make it perfectly clear that it's the MEN who are saying it's a scandal, not Taylor. Taylor knows it's a rose. At least twice on this album does she refer to kissgate as a scandal and with such venom that I'm very sure that that's what the old white men at her label told her it was at the time. And she's still angry about it (as she should!).
In the chorus we have "Cross your thoughtless heart/ Only liquor anoints you" Crossing your heart means you're making a promise to tell the truth, similar to a pledge or a pinky promise. And adding 'thoughtless' would imply she wants the other person to make this promise without any fear or consideration of the possible consequences. So, basically, "promise me something sincerely without thinking too much about it". Only liquor anoints you - Anointment is part of religious ceremonies and is usually done with holy oil to either improve someone's health or make them a saint. It's also done when kings and queens are crowned and I think that's the meaning here. The other person is being raised up to be a monarch or a saint, but with alcohol instead of holy oil. Personally, these two lines convinced me that Taylor is talking to her lover here, because asking for a sincerely promise, almost like a vow, and in return making the other person your king/queen is all very soft and romantic. Very 'King of my heart'. 😉 (and note that she's not saying I'M here to destroy you, she saying OTHER people will tell you that I'm going to destroy you)
In the second verse we're back to what the 'wise men' are saying and this time it's the bad seed that kills the garden (kinda self-explanatory) and then "One less temptress, one less dagger to sharpen". First they were warning the lover and now they're clearly trying to keep them apart by saying that this woman (Taylor) is a bad influence or a temptation. Not sure if I would call this a literary reference, but it's noteworthy that lesbians in early media portrayals (the days of the Hays Code) were often shown as predatory or evil women who would seduce the good straight girls and turn them gay... bad seed/temptress indeed.
Then we have an add on chorus with "Devils that you know raise worse hell than a stranger". This is in fact a saying "Better the devil you know" which means it's better to choose the bad thing you already know over a new one, because you're already used to this one. But again, in this context it's flipped (she does this a lot). In this case, the devil you know is in fact WORSE than a stranger. So they're saying to her lover 'this devil of yours is worse hell and you'd be better off with a stranger' adding to the above warnings, and then they're also adding the warning "You're in terrible danger/She's the death you chose". Boy oh boy, they really didn't want them to be together, very Romeo and Juliet indeed...
Ok, the bridge: "And when that sky rains fire on you/ And you're persona non grata/ I'll tell you how I've been there too And that none of it matters". -> All these warnings are coming to fruition and the sky is now 'raining fire' on her lover. Something bad has happened and they are persona non grata, which is Latin for an unwelcome person, but more commonly used to say the worst person you can think of. So, her lover is in the eye of the storm and is seen as the guilty person, but Taylor tells her that she's been through the same before and it doesn't matter. Like she said in her Lavender Haze video, "We just ignore it and protect the real stuff."
The third verse gives details about what the fire storm mentioned above actually was (just for context, I know you didn't ask about that): some people read some fake news about her lover and came after her because they believed it. The "Jackles raised their hackles" and being dragged from your bed at night very much gives witch hunt imagery, which is a cool choice for two reasons: 1) like the 'witches' her lover is innocent and wrongly convicted of a crime, and 2) all 'witches' were women. 😉
In the last chorus, of course, Taylor's albatross becomes the rescuing angel that swoops in to save her lover from being burned at the stakes. The devil becomes the angel and the anti hero becomes the hero. She says "I'm the life you chose and all this terrible danger". This reminds me of peace: Yes, the life you chose with me comes with shit storms sometimes ('would it be enough if I can never give you peace?') but I will always rescue you if I have to.
(And this part hasn't happened yet, one reason why I love this song so much, it feels like such a sneaky insight into things yet to come, same as FOTS and the Alchemy 😊)
So, there you go, hope this helped, never ask long questions if you don't want long answers ;)
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Could you do one (similar to your sir pentious post) where it's Adam x Reader but reader is strong and tall w/ motherly/fatherly vibes? Could be any scenario but I feel like there is too many Adam x readers where reader is just a submissive short person lol 😭
A/N: I agree. Well, Adam would probably prefer a short and submissive reader, but I think that he also likes women who look like they can top just so he can get off from domming them. A big ego boost, probably. That’s just what I think, though.
Also, uh, I went with motherly!reader. I hope that’s alright. Still kept relatively GN.
Warnings: Sex stuff is mentioned, Vulgar language, Adam being Adam
———
Adam x Tall&Strong Motherly!Reader
• the moment he laid his eyes on you, he made a straight beeline towards you with only one goal in mind:
• that *censored*
• (sorry. I couldn’t commit to the bit. I wanted it to be readable to anyone. By that I mean it was supposed to say cu—)
• he would attempt to achieve that by:
• 1) flirting horrendously
• 2) boasting about how awesome he is
• 3) …
• ...he doesn’t have that many steps, actually
• he just assumes that would be enough
• and it is, right? Of course it is. I mean, why the fuck wouldn’t it be? Hehepshftfhjf—*incoherent blabbering*
• if you refuse…what the fuck is that?
• he’d reject your rejection (that depends on how you do it, though. But that’s not the point.)
• if you accept, he’ll act very smug as if he knew you would
• he cannot wait to fuck your brains out
• and he has no shame in telling you that
• unfortunately, you weren’t as submitting as he thought you would be
• and he would be stupefied at first when you try to override him
• he would think, that’s cute, thinking you were in charge
• but then, holy shit, he’ll realize that you weren’t trying to impress him or anything—you were serious
• topping? Him? Heh, that’s fucking stupid
• he’d probably feel uncomfortable if he didn’t have control during sex
• it just wasn’t his style
• and there was no way he was getting out of his comfort zone just for you
• well, he finds what you’re doing is hot, but he doesn’t actually want that to happen, y’know?
• and the result?
• casual dating
• it’s really nothing serious
• the sexual part of your relationship will likely not be exclusive
• during your time together, he’ll finally form some more decent opinions about you
• he’ll like that you’re strong—he finds it hot and badass—but won’t like it when you use it against him
• he’ll probably use your strength to his advantage
• like opening jars for him
• it’s not as if he can’t open them himself, he’s just lazy as fuck
• “(Nameeee), I can’t open thissss” is a thing you’d probably hear a lot
• anyway, uh, he’s not a fan of your height difference
• he doesn’t really pay much attention to it, though
• because out of mind, out of sight
• he will be pissed if you do anything that’ll make him feel small, even if that wasn't your intention
• now, about your motherly nature
• Adam’s never had any parental figure before—the closest one being Sera—so he’ll be even more childish in behavior
• he tries to get approval from you and turns to you for reassurance quite often (all of which is done subconsciously)
• he’ll say stuff like, “Right, (Name)?” while nudging you
• with the dominant thing, I think Adam is actually fine with it
• the only thing he really wants to be dominant in is in bed
• but in general? Where you insist on making shit easier for him?
• where he gets to work less?
• (e.g., offering to pay the bill, confronting others for him—‘he asked for no pickles!’, etc)
• he’d be a fucking idiot to refuse you—how could he not want that?
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Hi, I am trying to write a homosexual book that takes place in the 20s. I am unsure where to start and how bad the 20s was for homosexuality so if you have any tips it would be appreciated. Thank you for reading.
Homosexuality in Historical Fiction
I'm going to answer this in two parts: (1) Tips for writing queer historical fiction, and (2) the 1920 gay culture.
Get Your Language Right
Vocabulary is key to capturing how homsexual people identified themselves and interacted with one another at the time. Consider:
The kind of language/code used at the time. For example, gay men in the 1950-60s would have spoken Polari to skirt UK’s strict anti-homosexuality laws. This might mean your characters say seemingly ridiculous things like, “Bona to vada your dolly old eek!” (good to see your nice face)
Authenticity vs. Sensitivity. We don’t need to perpetuate old slurs just because they were used “at the time”. Would the readers of today (your target audience) be accepting towards use of such language?
Is it really necessary? Just like in the case of foreign languages and dialects, it may be better to just refer to the code/secret language being spoken rather than overdoing it in dialogue. Also, does your character identify themselves as a part of this community at all?
Balance Between Struggle and Hope
Often in historical LQBTQ+ fiction, if the conflict is badly written, the readers are just going to feel angry and frustrated. Because:
Even the likable, otherwise reasonable characters won't be able to accept homosexuality easily, often opposing it downright.
Homosexual characters may be confused, struggle with self-doubt and self-hatred (which can't be fun to read, obviously)
The norms of the time make any “resolution” rather disappointing (compared to modern times).
Your goal is to juggle between these strong negative emotions to convey the central message and let hope shine through. Linger too much on negativity and your novel will be dark, but treating these themes 'lightly' will make you sound shallow.
So, treat oppression just as you would write a physical antagonist. It's powerful and a possible life-threatening opposition to the Lead, but it has flaws, loopholes and needs time to regroup before it hits our Lead again with increased force.
+ General Tips
Beware of giving your characters hindsight. As a writer, we know what happened both before and after the time period the characters live through, but they don't! The characters not being able to predict what comes can be a good tragic element.
The word “homosexual” wasn’t coined until 1869, and didn’t become common parlance until the early 20th century. From at least the very early 17th till the mid-19th century, the most common term for women was “tribade,” referring to the act of tribadism (scissoring). Some people used the term “fricatrice.” In the 18th century, “lesbian” and “Sapphist” started to become more common terminology. Men were called sodomites and pederasts (a word which didn’t have the paedophilic connotation it does today). The word “homophile” was coined in 1924 and was most commonly used by gay men and lesbians in the 1950s and 1960s.
“Gay” didn’t take on the almost exclusive meaning of homosexual until the 1960s, and even then, it was still used in the old sense of “merry” more than a few times. Only in the 1970s did it finally emerge as the most popular, mainstream word.
Less suspicions were aroused by a lesbian couple living together for decades than a gay male couple. Many people assumed they were just two very close spinster friends, not that it was a Boston marriage. There were many more questions about why two men would want to live together.
To avoid the very real risk of jail, lobotomy, conversion “therapy,” or the loonybin, sometimes a gay and lesbian couple would enter a ménage à quatre. Though it appeared on the surface as though two straight couples lived in the same duplex or right next door, they were actually just lavender cover marriages. Some had children (through various means) and co-parented.
Photo booths were seen as a safe space where a same-sex couple could kiss, cuddle, and embrace without fear of arrest or public suspicion.
Some lesbian couples were able to adopt children as single women, in jurisdictions which permitted that. More daring couples underwent artificial insemination and then went abroad to give birth, coming home with “adopted babies.”
Similar to the handkerchief code in the BDSM community, some gay men signalled to one another with red neckties and green carnations. Parisienne lesbians signalled to one another with violets in their hair.
There’s a long history of gay bathhouses, dating back centuries. Since male homosexuality was illegal and severely punished, a bathhouse was among the few places it was safe to meet potential partners and engage in sexual activity. Even the very real fear of police raids didn’t deter patrons. Manhattan, Paris, and London were home to many famous (and luxurious) gay baths, but there were plenty of lesser-known ones in other cities.
While not everyone was lucky enough to have a lavender ménage à quatre, many people had individual lavender marriages. Sometimes the spouse knew s/he was serving as a cover, sometimes not.
There were also more “traditional” ménage à trois marriages, composed of the lavender couple plus the true same-sex partner all living together. Sometimes these arrangements were composed of a bisexual plus a partner of each sex.
People did NOT casually out themselves! They could only confide their secret to other confirmed friends of Dorothy and extremely radical allies who had proven they could be trusted and wouldn’t turn on them.
You don’t have to make your straight characters raging, violent homophobes, but it’s completely unrealistic and historically inaccurate to show them all immediately, unquestioningly, lovingly accepting their friends’ homosexuality if the secret comes out. They might agree to not let anyone else know, but the friendship would probably be over. Other people, a bit more open-minded, might eventually reconcile but never be able to completely shake the belief that their sexual orientation is unnatural, strange, or wrong. Some people might only come around after decades of estrangement and realising gays and lesbians are just like everyone else.
To avoid discovery, some lesbians called one another by male names in their letters. Some liked those nicknames so much they continued using them in real life.
1920 Gay Culture
The United States - The Roaring Twenties
As the United States entered an era of unprecedented economic growth and prosperity in the years after World War I, cultural mores loosened and a new spirit of sexual freedom reigned.
Harlem’s famous drag balls were part of a flourishing, highly visible LGBTQ nightlife
"Pansy Craze”: gay, lesbian and transgender performers graced the stages of nightspots in cities
lesbian and gay characters were being featured in a slew of popular “pulp” novels, in songs and on Broadway stages (including the controversial 1926 play The Captive) and in Hollywood—at least prior to 1934, when the motion picture industry began enforcing censorship guidelines, known as the Hays Code. Heap cites Clara Bow’s 1932 film Call Her Savage, in which a short scene features a pair of “campy male entertainers” in a Greenwich Village-like nightspot. On the radio, songs including "Masculine Women, Feminine Men" and "Let’s All Be Fairies" were popular.
On a Friday night in February 1926, a crowd of some 1,500 packed the Renaissance Casino in New York City’s Harlem neighborhood for the 58th masquerade and civil ball of Hamilton Lodge.
Nearly half of those attending the event, reported the New York Age, appeared to be “men of the class generally known as ‘fairies,’ and many Bohemians from the Greenwich Village section who...in their gorgeous evening gowns, wigs and powdered faces were hard to distinguish from many of the women.”
The tradition of masquerade and civil balls, more commonly known as drag balls, had begun back in 1869 within Hamilton Lodge, a black fraternal organization in Harlem. By the mid-1920s, at the height of the Prohibition era, they were attracting as many as 7,000 people of various races and social classes—gay, lesbian, bisexual, transgender and straight alike.
London - Balls and Adverts
Like other large cities at the time, London was home to many drag balls and nightclubs where the gay community could express themselves.
"Lady Austin's Camp Boys" (1933): At a private ballroom in Holland Park Avenue, west London, 60 men were arrested in a police raid after undercover officers had watched them dancing, kissing and having sex in make-up and women's clothes. But despite facing a lengthy prison term and disgrace, the organiser, "Lady Austin", told officers: "There is nothing wrong [in who we are]. You call us nancies and bum boys but before long our cult will be allowed in the country."
Other gay men found partners through personal advertisements, which could be an equally risky strategy.
In 1920 the publisher of a magazine called the Link and three gay subscribers were each sentenced to two years of hard labor on charges of indecency and conspiring to corrupt public morals.
Some adverts even appeared in the national press, such as the Daily Express, although they were not quite so blatant. People would ask for 'chums' of their own sex and offer to take people on holiday.
One man responding to an advert in the Link wrote that he was "very fond of artistic surroundings, beautiful colours in furniture and curtains, and softly shaded lamps and all those beautiful things which appeal to the refined tastes of an artistic mind". He added: "All my love is for my own sex", and wrote that he longed to give his love "in the most intimate way".
Gay adverts often had references to Edward Carpenter, Oscar Wilde and Walt Whitman, or would say 'I have an unusual temperament'.
Berlin - The Weimar Republic
The Weimar Republic, Germany’s first parliamentary democracy lasted from 1918 until 1933 and was a time of progressive cultural renaissance from cinema, theater and music, to sexual liberation and a flourishing LGBTQ scene.
Berlin was home to around 40 known queer bars, a number which had doubled by 1925. The cabaret bars and clubs like Eldorado were packed to the brim with lust, tassels, glitter and flamboyance.
Drag shows were the norm and stars like Marlene Dietrich (a Berlin-native) and Josephine Baker who were icons for the queer community, performed regularly in Berlin’s lavish halls.
Kiosks sold an array of well known queer publications like Die Hoffnung (The Hope), Blätter für Menschenrecht (Leaflets for Human Rights), Frauenliebe (Woman Love), and Das dritte Geschlecht (The Third Sex).
As homosexuality was still illegal, Berlin’s Tiergarten and other parks, Nollendorferplatz as well as train stations and the infamous octagonal public bathrooms
Underground spaces flourished.
Here's a list of books with an LGBTQ+ POV character, set at least partly in the 1920s:
Self-Made Boys: A Great Gatsby Remix
Dead Dead Girls (Harlem Renaissance Mystery, #1)
In the Field
The Lady Adventurers Club
Last Call at the Nightingale (Nightingale Mysteries, #1)
A Good Year
The Last Nude
The Sleeping Car Porter
Once a Rogue (Roaring Twenties Magic, #2)
Slippery Creatures (The Will Darling Adventures, #1)
Crazy Pavements
References
https://www.bbc.com/culture/article/20180212-polari-the-code-language-gay-men-used-to-survive
https://www.theguardian.com/uk/2004/jul/03/gayrights.world
https://www.history.com/news/gay-culture-roaring-twenties-prohibition
#writers block#writers and poets#writing#creative writing#writers on tumblr#creative writers#helping writers#poets and writers#writeblr#resources for writers#let's write#writerscommunity#writers#writer#write#female writers#writer things#how to write#author#write every day#write it#write anything#write up#write that down#writing advice#writing community#writing tips#writing inspiration#writing prompt#on writing
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Reasons why I keep rambling about Bi!Eddie...
Why? Why would Eddie hide his sexual identity, bisexuality? Because... why not, he thinks.
Dating only women would mean less conflict with his family. His family is religious and Eddie loves them, is scared to lose them.
Eddie also fears triggering more conflict, maybe even fears his family might not consider him a good dad anymore if he came out.
He already almost had to fight for his son's custody with them. What if he comes out and they lash out? He has a dangerous job, works ridiculous hours, is a single parent. A queer man is not every courtroom's favorite person.
So women... That's where Eddie hides, it's what he knows. It's "a safe place to hide"... because in theory, it's fine, it's comfortable. Eddie is attracted to women. So he isn't really sacrificing anything, or at least much, he thinks... Just marry a woman you love, and it's all good. No need to come out and clash with your family, or make Christopher's childhood even more of a challenge. After all, the world is still prejudiced and not all children of queer parents have it easy.
But the truth is... Closeted life isn't a cake-walk even if you avoid detection, and are sort of adjusting. You are still hiding a part of yourself. Acting. Feeling like you need to pretend. Scared and unable to be fully yourself.
I've noticed that Buddie fans keep pointing to Eddie's panic attacks as this "haha gotcha, you're GAY!"-confirmation. It's ignorant.
Did you know that panic attacks are actually not at all unusual among closeted bisexuals, either?
Masks are always suffocating, no matter what you're hiding.
Not to mention, when Eddie starts having those panic attacks, he's under a world of pressure. Trying to recover and get back to dating... Quite soon really, after losing his wife.
He's also got a mountain of trauma and PTSD after surviving several near-death- experiences. To add to the trauma, the way he experienced the shooting? He thought Buck was wounded.
And then he is pressured into asking Ana out even though it hasn't been that long since he lost his wife.
Also I'm quite sure... His heart just isn't in it, dating. I think he has actually by that point fallen for Buck. And ignores it, tries to move on, forces himself to date someone else.
Get back on a horse, even if you don't really want to, feel the need to. Doesn't matter what you like, just do it anyway! "Horses" it is. Dating it is.
So Ana and Eddie? It's a tale of unrequited love, for Eddie, and for Ana. Falling for a concept because the person you truly want is simply not invested like you are, is emotionally unavailable to you.
The anxiety builds when people keep assuming Ana is Eddie's wife or Christopher's mom. It's too soon, it feels wrong. The relationship is just a mask because Eddie hasn't actually moved on. From Shannon, or from Buck. He panics when Ana says. "I'm not his mother... I'm... just a friend."
It's a reminder that she isn't Shannon - not Christopher's mom.
And she isn't Buck either. Buck who isn't really Christopher's father, who is... just a friend.
And like Buck... Ana is becoming Eddie's ready-made family anyway. Actually the third ready-made family, really. Shannon, Buck, Ana... All happened without much room to stop and re-consider.
Shannon... A rushed shotgun marriage triggered by an unplanned pregnancy and catholic guilt.
Buck, (a seemingly) straight friend quickly becoming family - clearly a dead end romance-wise.
Ana... A rushed, pressured romance built out of need to forcibly move on, and find a step-mom for Chris. Three ready-made families, all destroying Eddie in different ways. Anxiety, inner turmoil, panic.
....
So. Eddie's bisexuality!!!
That ice skating scene in "Malfunction"? The episode is very Eddie-centric, and the theme is "Me a tough macho man, me trust nobody, ugh!"
There's Eddie's fight club clusterfuck, his argument with Lena about Eddie being emotionally distant. Eddie, crying in front of Bobby about his grief, about Shannon leaving because Eddie "broke" her, because he wasn't enough...
Eddie = Trust issues galore, abandoment issues galore. Persistent shame and guilt making him unable to go for anything he really wants. Avoidance. Hidden pain. Constant urge to be in control, and never slip.
So let's look at that ice skating scene in "Malfunction"...
It's a blood bath on ice. Figure skaters toe-picking and getting injured, all because of one fallen sequin on ice triggering a domino effect. Bobby knows to look for a sequin because he's got some experience with this stuff.
Chimney: So how come you know so much about figure skating?
Eddie: Always thought you were a hockey player, cap.
...
Bobby: Who says you can't do both?!
(They team is shocked. Buck says "We'll google for photos later"
Chimney waves his hand around like he agrees... But in a way that ends up looking like he's pointing at Buck AND Eddie. And Hen then throws this shocked lingering stare at Buck and Eddie, like she just realised something!)
...Who says you can't do both? Indeed... Is there some secret quota, unknown to me, that dictates how many bi characters a tv show can have?
Is there a law that a queer male ship must always be the sum of one bi male, one male gay character? Why do we expect that? Because it would be more diverse, more varied representation?
Correct me if I've got this wrong... But writing Eddie as gay would in fact not score the show more diversity points, not in the realm of 9-1-1.
The show STARTS OFF with a storyline about a closeted, married gay man! If Eddie was gay... It would be the show's second storyline about a closeted, married gay man. That's not diverse representation. That would be in fact... quite repetitive, unimaginative queer representation!
Also, let's keep in mind that the show already has several gay male characters by the time Eddie joins the team.
Michael! David! Josh! That's already three gay men. If Eddie was gay, Eddie would be the fourth gay male character.
Oh wait. Tommy. So... FIFTH one! Also there are even more strictly gay monosexuals: Two lesbians. Hen and Karen.
However, there are just two confirmed bi character so far. Buck and Eva.
So really, Who says you can't "do both"?
Who says both of these characters can't be interested in women and men, into more genders than one? Who says both Buck and Eddie can't be bi?
"We're everywhere, man." That's Eddie's line in that scene, gif below. (And pink+yellow balloons, blue gloves? Pansexual-coded colors. Multisexuality!)
Eddie, subtly illuminated in bi-coded colors. Blue, purple, pink... On a date with a woman.
Talking with Buck. Bi-coded lighting.
Oh look, what's behind Eddie? The famous bi-cycle. While he talks about "the menu" not being the issue...
"The sex was never the issue", with Shannon. Canonically they actually went at it like bunnies, even to the detriment of their relationship because they failed to talk due to being too distracted by each other's bodies.
"The "menu" is not the issue." And it's not with Marisol, either. Not until Eddie learns of her hyper religious past.
Confronting Marisol, a former nun-student? That's the issue here, that's what Eddie's trying to avoid. Confronting his obviously at least at one point very religious, quite possibly bigoted girlfriend...?? Would certainly be an issue, if you're bi!!! Who wants to date a bigot?! Your very own domestic hate crime.
So... Eddie talks about the upcoming alone time with Marisol (when Chris was away) feeling exciting, naughty... Until he learns she was almost a NUN!
He talks about "eyes on the ground". And that's what dating a fundamentalist would be, if you're bi and closeted. Eyes on the ground, close to you.
Suddenly being judged for same-sex attraction is no longer just a distant fear, a vague idea to Eddie, it's a living, breathing person in his home, in his bed.
Really, imagine dating a bigot. Imagine your partner being disgusted, disturbed, judgemental... by your sexuality, your identity, your desires, dreams. Imagine them being repulsed by such an fundamental, persistent part of what makes you... you. Something you cannot change.
Imagine sometimes fantasizing about men as well as women, and then... trying to have sex with someone... who you suspect might consider your secret fantasy life disgusting, wrong. Imagine that negative reaction if they knew the whole truth, who you really are?!
An efficient boner killer, for sure!! No wonder Eddie is suddenly avoiding her company, anxious by the idea of sex with her. He doesn't trust Marisol anymore.
Also, let's talk about Eddie and moving on.
Why going home is an issue. Leaving Buck's place is an issue. Because trying to move on? Those words just need a melody, and ta-dah it's the Eddie Diaz theme song. The story of his life. The concept just keeps coming up.
Moving on. Being unable to move on.
Quite frankly, I think this is the main reason why Eddie cannot date without freaking out.
When Eddie joins the team he's still stuck on Shannon. "They weren't my type." Less awkward than to say "Sure they were hot, but I do have an estranged wife."
Shannon was his first crush, love, his first everything. The mother of his child. His friend. But they were young, not ready to get married and have a child, especially one with special needs. They were pushed to do that anyway when Shannon suddenly got pregnant, unplanned.
Btw, may I just point out that they're already under a lot of pressure and struggling when we first see them together on the show?
What we miss out on seeing... are the times when things were still great! That creates a limited, tinted view of their romance, and warps our entire view of their relationship. When we first see Eddie and Shannon, their relationship is already quite fractured, and falling apart.
Doesn't mean it always was bad.
Inability to work together. That eventually destroyed their relationship. Both failed to listen to each other, to be a team. Their love died because their mutual trust and respect died.
Eddie couldn't handle sudden parenthood, sudden marriage (and catholics truly expect forever), Christopher's cp diagnosis. He enlisted, escaped to the army. Shannon couldn't handle the guilt, thinking the cp was her fault. They fought all the time. Eddie let his parents meddle with Christopher's upbringing, walk over Shannon. He refused to listen to her when she wanted to move to another city. Eddie avoided bonding with Chris.
So when Eddie got home from the war-zone, she left. Eddie was suddenly alone with Chris. And Shannon was gone for a long time. Her leaving, it was a shock to the system. Eddie no longer trusted her, she'd abandoned him, and more importantly, abandoned Chris.
So Eddie is struggling. Alone. Hurt.
And then... Eddie meets Buck, who is ridiculously helpful. Buck is someone Eddie can count on. They're almost instantly a team.
So Eddie moves on from Shannon, and falls for Buck. From that point on? There is no real room for others. From then on it's just barely discreet heart-eyes at Buck, and Eddie not truly wanting to date anyone (else).
Eddie doesn't really want to get back together with Shannon when she returns. The sex is still great, that was never the issue, they both agree on that one thing...
But she was simply gone for too long, she even says this. It's obvious. Eddie has adjusted to life without her, found a new focus, moved on from her.
For example when we see Eddie, Buck and Chris visit Santa? Eddie talks about Shannon to Buck in this almost anxious way, like he feels the need to explain himself to Buck, like he's been cheating on Buck. Buck then calls Eddie "brother", and Eddie's face, just for a moment... Falls. He looks disturbed, disappointed, to be called "brother".
Eddie tries to mend the relationship with Shannon. It's obviously out of a sense of duty (catholic guilt, marriage should last, divorce is wrong), he keeps waiting for a "sign", keeps ducking her questions, pushing her away, keeps dragging his feet. His heart is no longer in it. Shannon realises this, wants to break up.
And then she dies. Eddie grieves. Feels guilt for failing to salvage the marriage. And then Eddie is just... stuck. Unable to move on, from grieving Shannon, from the guilt caused by their failed marriage, from Buck. Tries to force himself to move on. Fails. Keeps dying inside.
Heart's already taken.
.....
There are so many talks about moving on after that. Seemingly they are all about Shannon, and I do think they are about Shannon...
Just not... entirely. After all, Eddie didn't really want to get back together with her, did he now. We see them fighting, a lot. Their relationship wasn't dancing on roses, there were serious problems.
So the talks about moving on are also about Buck. Buck, who Eddie thinks is straight, yet parenting Chris with him. They become close, are seen doing all sorts of domestic family stuff.
What a painful existence would that be, to raise your child with someone whom you love and desire, but who you think cannot ever return your feelings? Who wants that? Of course Eddie would want to move on!!
Then shit happens... And Eddie clearly just... spirals without Buck. Partakes in illegal fights to let off steam. Yells at Buck at a grocery store about "not being around, Christopher missing him..". They end up looking like a couple in the middle of a messy divorce.
People, including Buck, pressure Eddie into dating. Buck keeps dating women. Eddie... keeps having talks about moving on.
Looks totally dead as he tells Buck that he needs to move on, Eddie has. It's an obvious lie, and it's such a bizarre thing to say to a friend, no matter the circumstances - very relationship-coded.
Almost like Eddie was just desperate to voice those words out loud, wishing that saying them would turn them into reality. Move on, I have!! (Move on, stop approaching me, stop tormenting me like this.)
....
So move on, Eddie...
....
There's Buck, urging Eddie to ask Ana out.
......
Bobby, telling Eddie that he will always miss the family he once had, but he loves the new one he now has. So you should try moving on, Eddie!
.......
Eddie's doctor... suggesting he could be repressing things.
The talk with the doctor;
They're talking about the shooting... Until it sounds like Eddie isn't.
Eddie: I don't even think about him anymore.
Doc: That could be called repression.
Eddie: Or just... moving forward.
Then some more subtext about pining. Remember Buck... being compared to a golden retriever?
Remember the man who cornered himself on a roof? Whining that he always wanted a dog but mom wouldn't let him because "Barry was allergic!"... (Or maybe, queerphobic?)
.....
Ana: There's a lot to be said for getting back on the horse. But there's also value in learning that you don't like "horses".
Eddie: I'm sorry?
....
Carla, telling Eddie to follow his heart, not Christopher's.... (Edit. Btw, look up the pictures of those hearts, I can't add more pictures to this post.There's Buck's silly, happy "misunderstood the assignment" love-type heart symbol... The one Chris drew, the one Carla warns against following?
Dead-looking, clinical, anatomical. And it's drawn with bisexual-flag colors!!!!
Love can't be about logic and rationality, reasoning with yourself and finding a good enough match. Even if on paper it makes sense. Love needs to be an emotion. It needs to make you happy.)
.....
The first day Buck and Eddie meet:
Buck is taking selfies.
Eddie: You're in the wrong lighting, man.
Buck: Some of us don't need lighting to look good!
And...
Years later... At the dark firestation, Eddie looking at Buck, getting lost on his memory lane, forgetting to introduce Ana.
Ana: Even in the dark this place is amazing! (The parallel to "Some of us don't need lighting to look good.")
And Eddie panics.
(*panicking, looking between Ana and Buck*)
Eddie: I don't want these things to wilt!
.....
After that... Eddie, looking at Buck:
Somehow we became a ready-made family, and I... I don't know if I'm ready for that.
(and how could he be ready for that, he thought Buck was straight.)
.....
Eddie talking with his tía, learning that she's been married twice, not just once, like Eddie always thought.
Eddie, learning that she had been unable to move on from the first husband, and didn't feel ready to date... But her friends had dragged out anyway, and that's when she had met her second husband-to-be.
And it was this, meeting someone else, that made her move on. So Eddie forces himself to date, thinking that all he needs to do is meet the right person, and he'll finally move on.
.....
The scene with Marisol, setting her bag on Eddie's hallway table.
Checking that it's not falling off... because there is barely enough space for Marisol to set down her belongings.
The table is already full. There's a toy truck on it, which BUCK gave Chris, years ago,
and it takes so much room.
It's lit, under a lamp, in the center of a table, the first thing you see when you enter Eddie's home. A prized little thing, a treasure. It's clearly valued, spotlighted like art... Even though a toy like that? Would not be very expensive.
Still, it's clearly something Eddie cherishes. Chris is no longer a little kid, he doesn't play with toys like that. But the truck stays, it's something Eddie wants to keep looking at. And it's huge, centered, leaves little room for something else.
Eddie is pining!!!!
Whether he realises it or not... This man is in love, that's why his relationships feel so suffocating, why they keep failing. His heart is already taken. His romantic relationships are just glued on, they're pretense, acting, a desperate attempt to move on, from Buck.
#evan buckley#911 buddie#buddie#eddie diaz#buddie 911#911 on abc#evan buck buckley#911 abc#tv: 911#eddie díaz#bi!eddie#bisexual erasure#bi buck#abc 911#Ana Flores#shannon diaz#Marisol Doe#i make no gifs brain is potato
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do u think i could get more daryl x ftm reader smut ? it can be anythingg . also IM SORRY 4 ASKING AGAIN BUT I NEED 2 BE FED AND IM 2 LAZY 2 WRITE . love ur writing 💗
Darylxftm!reader
Mdni, 18+
Warnings: p in v, cream pie, anger, mentions of dysphoria, I think that’s all!
Daryl had a shit day.
He hates being new in Alexandria, he hates all the questions and especially hates all the damn questions from the women.
When carol had asked him to go to the pantry for her, he reluctantly obliged but he internally cursed Carol when he got there.
One of the women that wouldn’t leave him alone was in there.
“So… Daryl, right?” She asked, pretending she doesn’t know.
He grunts as a reply.
“Hm… well… you gotta job around here yet?” She bats her eyelids at him and Daryl visibly winces and looks away, god he hates this.
“Recruitin’”
She steps a little closer.
“Are you… with anyone? Yknow it gets a little lonely sometimes…”
He steps away, not answering her question, none of her business.
He was with someone, you, so eventually he nods, trying to quickly find what carol needed.
“Oh… you are? Who’s the lucky woman?”
Despite the fact Daryl had just told her he’s with someone, her advances didn’t stop, her fingertips grazing his leather vest.
Who’s the lucky woman… for Christ sake.
Daryl grabs her wrist and pushes her off but not too forcefully, knowing that she could turn it into a big thing, getting him kicked out.
He couldn’t get kicked out, needed to be with you, you’re his boy.
The woman hadn’t even considered that Daryl weren’t into women, but no one ever does. He’s not sure why, he supposes it’s either the way he presents himself or if people know about his background, they just assume.
They shouldn’t though, Daryl never assumes anything.
Eventually, Daryl found the damn chocolate for carol and bolted outta there.
Once he stormed into the house he shared with you and Carol, he slammed down the chocolate on the counter in front of Carol.
“What’s up with you?” Carol asks, surprised by he apparent anger.
He groans, “where’s y/n?”.
“Downstairs, in your room I’m pretty sure, you okay?”
“M’fine” he growls.
He turns to head downstairs before stopping, noticing that there were no dishes in the sink.
“S’he even been up ta eat sumthin’?”
Carol frowns as she thinks, “no, I don’t think he has”.
With that, Daryl makes heavy foot steps down the flight of stairs to his basement bedroom, trying to calm himself before entering.
Once he steps in, he sees you, sat on the edge of his bed in just your boxers and a baggy t shirt.
You can sense the frustration straight away.
“What happened?”, you ask gently.
He doesn’t answer yet, striding over to his work bench and shrugging his leather vest off to hang it on the back of the chair.
Then he turns to look at you, he’s got that dark look in his eye which can mean two things. He’s either pissed off… or horny.
Your eyes flit to his jeans and that’s when you notice the bulge at his crotch.
“Yknow what I can’t stand? Hm?”
Now is when you realise he is in fact, pissed off and horny, a combination that you quite like so you smirk a little but try to hide it.
Daryl steps closer so that he’s stood between your legs as he looks down at you.
“Hate when fuckers assume shit…”
He reaches down, hooking under your armpits and lifting you slightly so you’re in the centre of the mattress.
Stood at the foot of the bed, his eyes drag down your body, which is smaller than his.
“Did you assume I wouldn’t find out ya ain’t eaten today, y/n?”
His fingers pull at his belt, undoing it skilfully, eyes not leaving you.
“Told ya to eat sum’n by the time I got back didn’t I?”
He kneels on the bed, his body towering over yours as his hands come to your boxers shorts, tugging at them, pulling them down your thighs.
He pulls them off your ankles so he can spread your thighs apart, seeing how wet you are already when he hadn’t even done anything yet.
“Didn’t I?” He’s eyes move to yours, waiting for an answer.
Your cheeks redden a little at his attention, your thighs trying to close against his force.
“M’sorry, Daryl…”
He holds your thighs apart, “Mm, yer gon’ be, boy”.
Despite being dominant in this moment, Daryl really does treasure you like an angel, he wouldn’t want to force anything on you so he lessens his grip, realising that he’d let his pent up anger get the best of him so far. Despite knowing you quite enjoyed how he was acting, he never wanted to assume.
His hands move to your hips, slipping under your shirt to rub and your sides.
“Can I take this off ya, pretty boy?”.
He always made sure to ask this, every single time, knowing that sometimes you struggled with dysphoria and might be uncomfortable with taking your shirt off.
You nod.
“Need your words, baby boy”
“You can take it off…”
So then he slowly pull the t shirt up off your body, revealing your small chest, no binder.
He was so grateful that you felt comfortable with him like this.
He leans over you and starts peppering kisses across your collar bone and then down your chest to your stomach then he pulls away, taking in the view of your completely naked body, all for him.
He squeezes your hips one more time before undoing the button on his jeans and pulling them down, revealing his dark grey boxers, a small wet patch where his tip is.
He squeezes himself through his boxers gently, groaning.
Your eyes are fixed to his seven inch erection, willing it out of its confines.
Daryl chuckles as he unbuttons his blue striped long sleeve, letting it drop to the floor.
“Needy little thing, ain’t ya?”, he says cockily as you let out a soft whine.
He grabs your thighs, pulling you to the edge of the bed, then he drops to his knees, hissing your ass cheeks and inner thighs before pressing a single kiss to your swollen clit and he growls into your wet cunt.
You assume he’s going to use his mouth, but then you remember you really shouldn’t assume when he stands back up, pushing his boxers down, his heavy cock springing free.
You lift your head to look down your body, wanting to see every action.
Daryl grips his erection in one hand, tapping his leaking head twice against your throbbing clit, making you gasp.
“What do ya need, Hm?”
“You.” You reply quickly.
“Me?” He teases.
You buck your hips upward, searching for friction, “pleeeease, need you in me, Daryl, please” you whine out.
Daryl lines himself up with your entrance.
“That’s a good boy”
Then he pushes in fast, grunting at the tightness.
“Shit, y/n”
You wiggle you hips slightly, to adjust to his size.
He grips your hips tightly, “none of that, behave” he warned, knowing he won’t last long if you keep up your antics.
Then he pounds into you, roughly, seeking the release of his pent up frustrations from the day.
He leans over you, burying his face into your neck to nip at your flesh as he lets out small whimpers moans whilst you whine like a needy puppy, getting closer to your climax.
Daryl knows, so he moves one hand from your hip to press his thumb against your aching clit and massage circles into it.
“Want ya to cum for me, pretty boy, cmon..”
His words send you over the edge, squeezing your eyes shut and you grip his shoulders, your orgasm taking over your body as your small frame shakes beneath his large one.
The feeling of your inner walls clenching around him makes him gasp as he give a powerful thrust, his hips flush against your as he empties himself into you, you can feel the hot load fill you up.
He pants as he holds himself up on his elbows, his large hands cradling your head as he kisses your forehead.
“Did I hurt ya?” He looks at you with concerned eyes but you shake your head, he gives a relieved sigh.
He shifts his hips back, pulling out gently and then reaching for his boxers.
You frown a little, assuming he was going to give you cuddles like he usually would, but you should never assume.
“Cmon, get dressed… I’ll give ya all the cuddles after ya eat sumthin’, can’t have my boy wastin’ away now, can I?”
You smile a little, he’s so good at taking care of you in his own way.
Once you’re up and dressed, he pulls you into an embrace, holding your head to his chest, pressing a kiss to the top of your hair.
“I love ya, y/n”.
You hum, contentedly, “I love you too…”
Please forgive me if this sucks!!
#daryl dixon imagine#the walking dead fanfiction#twd daryl#daryl dixon fanfic#daryl dixon fanfiction#daryl x reader#daryl dixon smut#daryl smut#norman reedus#twd smut#ftm#ftm!reader#ftm ns/fw
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Disconnected (Matty Healy)
warning: not smut but it might as well be. mentions of doing the dirty but. it doesn’t happen. you know. also george gets roasted sorry georgenation
note: meow
⋆*･ﾟ:⋆*･ﾟ:*⋆.*:･ﾟ .: ⋆*･ﾟ: .⋆
he collapses on top of you, sweat coating his bare skin. a long exhale releases from his lungs as he sinks into your body. you keep your hands on his back, rubbing up and down comfortingly, soothing the angry red marks left by your nails just a few minutes ago.
he hums in contentment and places featherlight kisses to the right side of your neck. you giggle and push him off you.
“what? done with me already?” you don’t say anything, expecting him to just fall asleep like he usually does at the end of your ‘after he gets back from the studio quickie.’ it’s not always like this, your sex life with him, this is just one, predictable aspect of it.
it’s almost like you both know how good he fucks you when you ask for it, that it makes up for all the simple, mundane sex you have most of the time.
suddenly, he turns to his side, propping his head up on his hand, and his silent stare is harrowing. “yes?” you ask him, wishing you could read his mind. sometimes you swear he can read yours.
“can i ask you something?” he doesn’t meet your eyes when he says this, and you can only assume the worst.
1. would you still love me if i was gay?
2. will you help me bury the body?
3. when i die of terminal cancer, will you promise not to remarry?
you’ve just been staring at him staring at the crisp white bedsheets and when he looks into your eyes, you are reminded that he can’t actually read your mind, and your attempts at telepathic communication are feeble.
“sure, baby.”
“ok. i’m gonna ask you, and no matter what your answer is, i promise i won’t get mad. you hear me?”
“yes?”
he reaches out to grab your arm, “i mean it, i won’t get mad, i’m just genuinely curious, i’m not fishing for a compliment or anything, i just really want to know.”
what on earth is he on about?
“just ask your question.”
he sighs again. “who’s the best man you’ve ever hooked up with?”
you close your eyes in a mix of both confusion and a bit of disappointment. “like… character-wise or sex-wise?”
“sex-wise.”
you nod, about to say something.
he doesn’t let you.
“i bet it was george, wasn’t it. i’m sure of it. god, when you two hooked up, he was in his prime. i mean, not that he isn’t fit now, i’m sure he still fucks, but back then… i bet he knew what he was doing. how was it with him? be honest, i won’t be upset.”
you just smile silently as he can never shut his big mouth. “that’s pretty gay.”
he chuckles at your response, still egging you on for a real response. “come on, he’s a drummer, so obviously, he’s got rhythm, and he’s a very big boy, so you know he’s got the size.”
you reach forward to brush a stray curl behind his ear, enjoying his beautiful tranquility for as long as you can, because you know he will inevitably get riled up the more this conversation continues.
“i’m starting to think you just want to hear about what it’d be like to fuck your friends,” you brush your fingers through his hair continuously, and he closes his eyes, nearly forgetting about your conversation.
“you’re changing the subject darling,” he leans into your touch.
“so you’re saying you don’t want to know? what it would be like?”
he opens his eyes, “of course i want to know! we’re all straight men in committed relationships to beautiful women, i may never get the experience.”
you rest your hand on the edge of his face, rubbing his temple in circles with your thumb. “you know, if you ever wanted to fuck any of them, i think i’d let you. it’s only fair, since me and george, you know.”
“it wouldn’t be the same, though, because when you and him fucked, we weren’t together yet, i hadn’t told you i liked you. it would mean too much if i shagged my mates now since you and i are you know… whatever.”
you gasp in amusement, “did you really just refer to our relationship as whatever?”
he pouts, but you know he’s laughing on the inside. “i’m sorry.”
“it’s fine, i guess.”
“wait, you never answered my question!”
“alright. i’ll get into it. you ready?” he nods, looking more prepared than you are for what’s to come. “george was… i mean… it was good. to somebody else, maybe it was great. but to me? i don’t know, we just didn’t mix well together.”
“what d’you mean, baby?”
“like, okay, you look at a guy like that, you assume a certain thing from him while fucking. like you go into doing it with a level of expectations, somewhat high, and he just didn’t meet them.”
“can you be a little more vague? i think i’m almost understanding you, god forbid that happen.”
“fine, fine. truth is, he was too gentle. like you said, he’s a drummer, he’s super muscular, and he’s huge, you expect him to give a rough fucking or even something adjacent to it, and like, i mean, i’m a big girl, i can take it, but every 5 minutes was like ‘are you okay?’ ‘is this too much’ ‘do you need me to stop?’ you’d have thought he was a virgin the way he was so awkward and nervous and gentle. it was weird.”
“that is weird. i never thought that’s how it would be with him.”
“did i ruin the magic for you? now that you know fucking your best friend would be underwhelming?”
“it wasn’t magic, more morbid curiosity,” he speaks.
“morbid? it’s not like we’re talking about fucking a dead body, it’s just george.”
“agree to disagree, my love.” he gets up, butt ass naked, and pulls on some clean boxers from his closet. then, he stops in his tracks, and turns around to face you again. “wait, answer the question, for real this time. i won’t be mad.”
“it’s you.” you speak it plain, simple, and true. you wonder why he even debated the question.
“really?”
“really. it’s always been you.”
“aw, that’s so sweet. just don’t go getting feelings for me, i’m a lone wolf, don’t do relationships,” he warns as he walks out of his room, heading to his kitchen.
the irony hits you as heavy as the new engagement ring on your finger he presented to you a week ago. you laugh to yourself, feeling smitten.
he returns in a moment with a glass of water and sets it down on the nightstand next to where you lay. “drink, darling”
you obey, giving him a look over the rim of the cold glass as it rests against your kiss-swollen lips. you swallow, “you’re being pretty sweet to me, for a ‘lone wolf.’”
he smiles, enjoying the near endless banter between the two of you. “every alpha needs their omega.”
“ew, that’s gross, get out of here, you freak!” you gently nudge him off of the side of the bed where he sits.
he gives you his classic dumb smile as he leaves the room with the now empty glass of water, likely returning it to the dishwasher.
when he gets back, you can’t help but continue his dumb conversation. “i think i’m the alpha in this relationship, anyway. you’re my bitch.”
he nods in agreement, “i’m your bitch.”
⋆*･ﾟ:⋆*･ﾟ:*⋆.*:･ﾟ .: ⋆*･ﾟ: .⋆
taglist: @indierockgirrl @itssimpleanditgoeslikethis @milkluvr8 @americanangel
#the 1975#matty healy x reader#ratty matty#matty healy x you#matty healy fanfiction#matty healy 1975#matty healy imagine#matty healy fanfic#matty healy fic#matty healy#matty healy smut#george daniel fanfic#george daniel smut#george daniel the 1975#george daniel fic#george daniel x reader#george daniel#george daniel fanfiction#the 1975 fluff#the 1975 fanfic#the 1975 fic#matty the 1975#1975 band#the 1975 fanfiction#the 1975 smut#Spotify
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I absolutely loved the shy reader post, it's exactly what I was hoping for. Also implied fem! for Vaggie is perfectly fine and makes sense, Nifty was a good touch but it's so true I'm not mad😅 and g/n for the rest is a win for everyone, who wouldn't want them to experience these women confessing their feelings. I'd love to see part two with the women of heaven. Sadly no Carmilla pet names yet but I'll let you know if I think of any.
Cautions - SPOILERS, DO NOT READ IF YOU HAVEN'T WATCHED ALL OF SEASON ONE, if you are fine with spoilers or already know what's happening feel free to continue <33 ngl Sera was a bit tricky but we're cooking 🍳, cursing (duh), possibly ooc Lute, let me know if there are any others!
Genre - Fluff
Type - head canons
Comments - Hey hey! I'm so glad you loved them 🥹 From what I've seen online (I'm not active on Vivian's Twitter so I'm really just taking the word of others) that Vaggie is canonically lesbian and that Nifty is canonically straight, so that's why I did the respective genders. If I'm wrong, absolutely anyone correct me and show me what Viv has said otherwise 😭 But anyways, here are the heavenly women!~ (also, Lute might be a little ooc, I think it's okay though. Please give me some tips for characters with her personality 🙏🙏)
Sweet, shy thing~ Pt 2
Here's part one!
Emily
- You and Emily have been friends since you both came into existence
- Basically attached at the hip!
- Several times other angels had assumed you two were a couple, but Emily always corrected them that you were just friends. (You were always too flushed and shy to say anything)
- However, one day, when Emily was about to correct another angel, she hesitated
- She doesn't know why, but this time, she didn't want to correct them
- She thought about it long and hard that night, laying awake in her bed, wondering why she hesitated on telling the angel that you two were.. she can't even say it??
- That morning, she ever so groggily walked up to Sera, and asked her what was happening to her
- Sera chuckled, then explained that Emily might have a crush on you
- Neither you or Emily had ever been in a relationship before, you never really needed to. You always had each other, and that's all you both wanted
- Atleast.. that was all she wanted. Now she wants to be.. more to you than just your bestest friend
- She wants your little hangouts together to be romantic sometimes, for you two to hold hands
- The realization of her feelings for you has definitely brought out such cute and sappy thoughts Emily never thought would cross her mind
- She tells you around 4 months before the meeting with Charlie in heaven
- She had finally concocted the perfect plan to confess
- She brought you to a meadow outside of the more city parts of heaven. It was your little hiding space away from prying eyes (mostly.)
- When you arrived, she already had made a flower crown
- But the flowers she used weren't merely chosen at random, no no no. These flowers meant something, and that something was her feelings.
- You and her had studied the language of flowers together, just a passing hobby, and because it was so much fun!
- She used daisies, which means true love and new beginnings. Sun flowers, meaning adoration and loyalty, peace, love, and happiness. Some baby's breath, while used in bouquets for baby showers can also mean everlasting love and innocence. And finally, a daffodil, which means devotion.
- With all of these meanings in mind, you stared at the flower crown, practically screaming her feelings for you as she blushed, her hands shaking slightly as she looks away, silently waiting for your answer
- She doesn't look back up to you until you gently grab her shaking hands, steadying them
- Once they begin shaking less, you grab the crown, and place it on top of your head, a blush spreading across your face as your hands reach back down to hers, giving them a soft, reassuring squeeze
- No words were spoken, but that's all she needed. You returned her feelings, and you wanted to be with her, as her partner.
Seraphim
- She's a very reserved angel.
- She has to be, she ranks very highly in heaven. (Whether she earned her position or was created for it I have no idea but lets just say she had to work for it for my sake.) She worked too hard to get this position, any slips would ruin everything she's done.
- However, lately, she's been a bit more sleepy eyed, and yawning far too much. Michael, (I legit know nothing about the ranks in heaven, correct me 😭) her boss, has noticed and decided to assign her an assistant. That being you! Good job 👍
- As much as she appreciates Michael looking out for her, an angel of her ranking shouldn't need to depend on someone else, and while she does try to argue this with him, he isn't budging.
- She's a bit.. how do I say this, cold and bitchy to you? To begin with atleast
- She doesn't appreciate that she's being forced to have an assistant.
- So, she gives you harder tasks than you can probably handle. And she doesn't really bother to get to know you. Just that you're doing the work she assigned to you and returning it to her when she expects it
- After a while, she starts to warm up to you. And how long is that "while" you may be asking? Around.. 200-300 years....
- Y e a h, she doesn't warm up to you that quickly. But after those years, you can notice her warming up to you, and finally showing some decency of asking about your day
- Which starts your little conversations here and there. Mostly just talking about your days, funny stories, or talking about the work you both do, and some hobbies here and there
- You two grow closer, eventually starting to socialize outside of work, and you finally get to see Sera relax, no longer tense and stressed, but instead a less tense and much happier version of your boss
- The moment she realizes she fell for you was when one day she was looking forwards to seeing you at work.. but you didn't show up
- She was.. sad? She didn't fully understand why until she was reading later that day, a romance novel. It was one about lovers separated due to extreme weather, unable to see each other. The book described the longing both felt, and how sad they were being unable to contact each other.
- She immediately recognized those feelings as the ones she felt when you weren't at work.
- You returned to work a few days later, on top of your desk was a large bouquet of flowers, generally meaning good health and happiness as well as sprinkles of friendship here and there, as well as a note
- "My dear assistant, I thank you for taking care of me and assisting me with my paper work all these years. I have no words to thank you for everything you've done, despite how I treated you when you first began. In order to thank you, and try to apologize for my harshness, I wish to take you out to dinner. My treat, of course. Sincerely, Seraphim."
- And then you two loved happily ever after, the end <333
Lute
- She uh
- She doesn't like you
- I'm being so real
- Kinda like Nifty, she needs someone tough enough to match her or atleast get close
- ...is what she used to think
- HA I GOT YOUR ASSES-
- But because she's the way she is she doesn't like you at first
- Let's say you're a medic for the exterminators cause they get injured sometimes (just go with it)
- On occasion Lute would have to visit you because she got too carried away during the extermination or while training (do they train?? 😭)
- She didn't like going to you but she followed the rules as much as she could. This being one of them
- After so many visits to your office for various injuries she grew fond of you, her thoughts occasionally drifting to you, causing more injuries so she would have to see you again
- After several years of going in this cycle, she finally decided to ask if you two could hangout outside of your clinic
- You agreed, of course. And from then on you two became closer
- Now, to how Lute asks you out.. it's very blunt and straight forward
- It almost sounds like a demand
- "I like you, I want to go on a date with you at [this time] and at [this place]." With a bright red blush on her face 🤭
- Now, she immediately walked away after she said that because she was so embarrassed. So she didn't know if you actually accepted the date or not
- Lute only realized this after she got to the place she asked/told you to meet her at.
- So she was panicking severely, preparing herself to call Adam as a backup so she didn't look like she was lonely, and to blame it on Adam's careless attitude as to why she was waiting for so long.
- However, just as she was about to call him, you walked in, dressed nicely and a blush covering your face
- Lute.. was ecstatic. You actually came?? Even though you're so??? Shy??
- You both had fun talking over dinner, and after she walked you home, leaving a miss on your cheek before walking back to her place, only looking back once to see a deep blush spread across your face at the peck.
#head canon#reader insert#hazbin hotel#hazbin hotel emily#hazbin hotel sera#hasbin hotel lute#hazbin hotel x reader#hazbin hotel x male reader#hazbin hotel x gn reader#hazbin hotel x fem reader#hazbin hotel x you#hazbin hotel x y/n
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I wonder how Gaon and Yohan are going to explain the change in their interactions to Elijah, since it's going to be obvious to her that something has happened between them. Since Elijah knows that there's nothing between Gaon and Soo hyun, I wonder if she will play a role in clearing Yohan's misconception? Thanks for the update! I can't stop thinking how many ways this story can play out😅 Btw i really appreciate the time and effort you put into responding to our questions with such detail.
That definitely depends on who's doing the explaining xD Yo Han would just brush it off and pretend that nothing is happening — which would just piss her off — while Ga On would make a stilted effort to explain without making it too obvious what it's actually about. Which would also annoy her.
That poor girl, seriously. She doesn't deserve to get caught between these two idiots.
I'm not sure I agree that Elijah "knows" that there was nothing between Ga On and Soo Hyun, though. I think she very much thinks there was something between them. I mean, sure, they denied it when she asked if they were dating, but THE WAY they did so was pretty telling (especially in Soo Hyun's case). Even more so since Elijah is a bit... well, innocent? I think most of her experience with love comes from media, books etc. and how Ga On and Soo Hyun behaved is, well, straight from a drama xD
And Elijah also had that talk with Soo Hyun when they were eating ice cream on Ga On's terrace, where it became pretty obvious that Soo Hyun is in love with Ga On and has already confessed to him several times.
So I think Elijah very much believes they were in love. Which means she won't really play a role in convincing Yo Han otherwise — if asked, she'd probably only make it worse, even. Because her understanding of love is a bit superficial and probably pretty geared towards straightness. That's not to say that she's not aware of gay people (I think she might actually know more about that than Ga On does xD) but from the evidence she's seen both Ga On and Yo Han seem straight to her (because I can't imagine that Yo Han has flaunted his dalliances with other men in front of her).
I know I'm very, very firm about this but Elijah doesn't know that Yo Han and Ga On have the hots for each other. And not because she's stupid, but because she's grown up in a country where straightness is the norm and Yo Han has done everything he can to hide the depth of his and Ga On's relationship from her. Also, she's a self-centred teenager x'D
Like, take me for an example. I was around 23-24 and very comfortable in my own pansexuality but was still IN NO WAY PREPARED when my mum basically went: "I may only have had sex with two women in my life but, let me tell you — 10/10, would recommend." Because I had only ever seen her date and talk about men before and therefore assumed she had no interest in anything else. That's how easy it is to miss that someone close to you isn't entirely straight — especially if it's a parent/guardian.
So I really don't think that Elijah would notice until it gets a lot more obvious than this xD
Which wasn't technically what your ask was about (sorry for the tangent xD), but still important to know because Elijah really won't be all that helpful when it comes to Yo Han and Ga On figuring out their feelings for each other. In fact, she might just end up making things harder for them without meaning to. But more about that in later chapters ;)
ANYWAY. Thank you so much for the lovely ask! I'm so happy to hear that people are this excited and involved in my story! And, tbh, I can't help replying because I'm very excited, too, and love talking about my writing, my thoughts, and my takes on these characters. How could I resist? More often than not, I have to cut my answers short because I keep writing longer and longer ones.
Like, you guys have no idea how long the first drafts of my author's notes usually are. One time I had to cut half of it because it was reaching truly spectacular lengths. And sure, I know that some of you probably wouldn't complain if I had posted that first draft, but I'm trying to contain myself, okay? And also not reveal too much since it might end up spoiling future plot points. It's a constant struggle.
So yeah. I'm actually consciously holding back a lot of the time because I'm trying to not come off as completely unhinged x'D
#Amethystina Replies#Anonymous#Who Holds the Devil#I admit that I sometimes feel a little bad about being so firm about the Elijah situation#A lot of people seem to want her to be aware of Yo Han and Ga on's feeling?#And help them along?#But I genuinely don't see why she would be based on her character in the drama#She's incredibly clever yes#But also socially inept#(much like her uncle)#And a teenager#She's got her own problems to worry about#Her weird uncle's sexuality is NOT high on her list of priorities okay?
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Does anyone else feel like almost all of the conflicts that had to do with the various character dynamics in Chain of Thorns didn’t actually get resolved, they just unexplainably ceased to exist after two books of building them up because CC didn’t feel like writing them anymore and she didn’t know how to resolve it naturally after how she’d built the issues up so much?
Like how none of the characters but Cordelia and Thomas had any clue about the Alastair and Charles situation and then suddenly in CoT it was like who doesn’t know? Of course Matthew knew and didn’t say anything before and then randomly brought it up to Cordelia in Paris while assuming she knew too
Or how Alastair and Thomas went from how things were at the end of CoI with Alastair thinking it could never work because Thomas’s friends hate him to oh look everyone suddenly is friends with Alastair with no grudge with no development of that in this book at all, just an abrupt shift
Especially the Alastair and Matthew dynamic where Matthew hated Alastair and wanted him to have nothing to do with any of their friends and he spent CoI ranting about him to Cordelia. And then suddenly in CoT it’s like of course Matthew is supportive of Thomas and Alastair and oh look Matthew and Alastair are suddenly not just tolerating each other for Thomas’s sake but friends despite barely interacting and no development actually showing and never getting any mention of the other in their own POVs, just having Cordelia be like Alastair stop being dumb, you’re literally friends with him now
Or like everyone other than Christopher and Grace where it was like oh we don’t like her for how she’s treated us and her friends straight to anyway she’s one of us. Like yes Grace was useful and yes Tatiana manipulated her whole life, but none of that was why anyone changed their minds or opinions? It was just suddenly the flip of a switch when it was convenient for CC
Or Anna and Ariadne where it didn’t so much develop as Anna just acted mean to Ariadne on and off throughout the series and at the end of CoI she wanted nothing to do with a relationship and then in CoT she was just suddenly like sure I guess I do. Also, slightly different note, but I did not like that Anna barely interacted with anyone else for the entire book and she was just off in the corner being an irrelevant romantic subplot for almost all of the book except when she showed up to barely even be shown in the background being sad about her brother being dead
(Although Anna still got more of a reaction than everyone else and his death was poorly executed all around in the sense of how did you write this so predictably and poorly that no one even knows when he died and it’s so background and 99% of the characters don’t care at all and we don’t see his parents finding out or much of Thomas’s reaction or anything and it’s just as if he wasn’t a character anymore 2 seconds later which is a different genre of issue with CoT but similar problem in the sense that both issues made the book feel a lot more emotionless to read)
And how the issues of Thomas and Alastair being together as two men and Anna and Ariadne being together as two women in this time and the issues of what would happen if the fact that Charles and Alastair were gay got out to the entire Clave just disappeared and never got addressed at all. We know how the ClVe reacted to Alec Lightwood YEARS later. We know society was homophobic at the time TLH is set and that it seems like shadowhunter society was a lot less open-minded than mundanes a century later
I understand that Charles being blackmailed and making shitty decisions was annoying but it was like suddenly everyone finding out wouldn’t have consequences and all the other queer men characters were like how could you possibly be worried about this :/ as if they haven’t spent the whole series knowing they have to be careful about who they tell. And then suddenly it was just of course it’s totally fine and safe to have everyone find out and why wouldn’t you be fine with that. And it was really written in a way that had other queer characters like oh Charles is such a coward for not being ready to publicly tell a bunch of homophobic people his sexuality and it just wasn’t it??? And super weird after Thomas was terrified of telling even Anna and Matthew for years. And also, I did not care for the fact that when Charles did go risk getting outed to finally do the right thing, we didn’t even get to see it through any character’s perspective or how that important meeting went, we just got one line of dialogue from somebody else saying that it happened with no details at all. And I can’t think of other examples right now but there were quite a few moments like that where we got one line saying that something had happened that was important to the plot and to characters’ development that seemed like it would have been more interesting than some of what we did get to see where it was just totally breezed over and way too easy and totally background to less important stuff
And then there was the whole no one reacting to Ariadne and Anna dancing together publicly thing was like yeah that’s nice I guess but not realistic and it doesn’t go with the way things have been presented up to that point, it also just feels like a situation where CC was like well this would be easier for me so there just won’t be consequences and then they can easily end up happily together
And then there was the whole Thomas and Alastair thinking they couldn’t realistically be together thing and knowing they couldn’t get married or be known to be together by anyone they’re not close to and then at the end it’s still not really addressed how they’re going to be together? Like there was the laziest write off of the family tree being wrong and then we still are just left to assume that eventually they move in together and suddenly it’s not a problem and everyone’s fine with it? And then I also feel like we don’t actually know if everyone found out about Alastair and Charles’ sexualities after the blackmail or if people are going to assume about Thomas and Alastair or if that’ll cause issues or if no one knows outside of who they’ve told and they have to be careful or what. Which like wouldn’t necessarily need to be addressed if it wasn’t for the logistics of being together as two men in that time being part of the obstacle that they were struggling with being in their way and then it felt like it was totally forgotten to even be one at the end by CC
Idk like I’d love to think they just lived in a world where homophobia didn’t exist but it felt like homophobia was a plot point when CC wanted it to be an inconvenience and then suddenly disappeared just to make her writing easier the moment she didn’t want it there anymore instead of actually addressing the plots she raised with it if that makes sense?
And sorry, I really did not mean to go on a rant this long. And maybe everyone else had a very different reading experience than I did and other people don’t agree with some or all of this. I personally am just very confused about how the book was almost 800 pages long and it felt like so much of the development in it was us abruptly being told that development had happened rather than actually getting to see it and how so many of the issues were abruptly solved in an I don’t want to write this issue anymore kind of way rather than anything actually needing to be worked at outside of the Belial situation
Edit: You know what, I mentioned it in my tags but I feel like it’s annoying enough to put in the body of the post and make it even longer. What the fuck was with everyone outing or potentially outing everyone else just so that characters could openly talk about the queer characters and tell them to do what they want them to? Why did Matthew out his brother multiple times? Like yes, the people he said it to coincidentally already knew, but he didn’t know that. And why was Thomas outing Alastair? The straights got to keep their secrets as long as they wanted and fix their problems more naturally. Why did I have to sit through queer characters constantly having their sexualities and romantic histories to everyone else when they clearly had not okayed it? Why were the queer characters doing so much of the outing? Why were people who cared about them and knew what it felt like to be afraid of the wrong person finding out just broadcasting their sexualities to make it easier for CC to breeze past development to have their things get resolved fast? Why did no character have an issue with it at all?
#As a queer person the whole using homophobia against her characters as plot just to pretend homophobia doesn’t exist and call her characters#cowards for worrying about it as soon as she’s decided writing it doesn’t serve her plot agenda anymore really icks me right out#Like yeah I’d love homophobia to not exist but girl what are you doing that’s so gross to go about it that way#ALSO everyone outing or potentially outing everyone else to other characters to make it easier to get the queer characters to do what she#wanted them to was a HORRIBLE vibe. Why is Matthew outing his brother? Why is Thomas outing Alastair? Why is everyone telling everyone else#people’s sexualities as if it’s nothing and everyone has a right to know when that character clearly did not feel that way#And it’s so out of nowhere every time too#Hot take: Charles protecting Alastair’s privacy instead of outing him was more valid than anything any of the other queer characters said#about Charles or Alastair’s sexualities even if I hate Charles and his going along with the blackmail was bullshit#Also now that I’ve written all of this down and 99% of what I wrote about in here has to do with the canon queer characters that’s not#a great look either that she did breeze over some of the stuff with the other characters for sure but she was way more likely to skip depth#and development with the queer characters in CoT#CC said no slow burn gradual changes in this book… there’s only room for abrupt 180s and Cordelia running 🏃♀️#Sorry if this has weird typos and other mistakes in it. I typed on my phone and didn’t check for autocorrect nonsense and I’m too lazy to#reread this all rn at my current brainpower level#CoT#Chain of Thorns spoilers#Chain of Thorns#The Last Hours#The Shadowhunter Chronicles#Cassandra Clare#My Posts
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the way sam is the only female coded character in existence and the only proof we actually need is the audience reaction!!! drives me crazy! the one time i like a male character and he gets treated like a female one like not even just by people that dont like him and say hes whiny and a bitch but like he also gets the "female character is too smart to join in the boys fun" treatment in fic by people who supposedly DO like him!! why is he getting the girlboss treatment?
also dean calls him a bitch fully seriously in an argument like not in a "oh your acting like a woman" way that people call men bitches but in the fully serious like calling a woman a bitch way. i cant explain it but there is a difference and sam got women treatment in that scene (theyre arguing about dean killing amy if you cant remember the moment)
its just so unusual to me to see a male character get this treatment. its so weird to see
no you're so real anon. i primarily focused on the treatment he gets from male fans of the show because they literally act like anything but servitude or submissiveness towards dean and his actions is a moral failing, which is just like how sexist men expect women to act toward their fathers/ husbands/ male authorities at all times. and it's crazy!
but i've seen the more 'benevolent' or girlbossy types of misogyny against him too; i actually made a post about a related phenomena a while back. when sam gets called a woman some people use that to separate him from the 'regular' male characters and elevate him to this infallible bystander status, which of course makes him harder to relate to, less humanized. which is not to say i haven't seen some less savory interpretations from sam fans too, though the misogyny was intended there i'm assuming, for example ones were gets targeted sexually for being 'feminine' by predatory men or entities like azazel. and that's ignoring the fandom in general being rife with misogyny, this is all focused on a character who, going by the source material, is a cis man. what not having a female main character does to you for real.
and yeah dean, and the show as a whole, absolutely try to feminize sam as another way to degrade or victimize him. comments like you're a red headed woman, the ghost goes after chicks, hell even all the jokes about possessions, or the ones straight up alluding to rape (having a girl inside you, teen pregnancy, made you my bitch), all draw from this idea that sam is very womanly and that's the reason bad things happen to him or why he deserves to be made fun of.
as for the fight, i'm assuming you mean this from 7x07?
i agree the bitch comes off as weird here, dean is playing into the 'woman too irrational to make decisions for herself' stereotype, and tries to convince sam that his choice was the moral one because it comes from a less emotional/ irrational place. and like i said before, dean's decision making is not to be challenged with how the show is framed, which makes misogynistic slurs against sam always feel more targeted.
anyway i agree that it's weird but it's also very fascinating to me. hope this still makes sense because it got a bit long. thank you for the ask.
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I saw you wrote some hcs for Tony looking after reader when she's on her period (absolutely lovely btw!), and I'm guessing that is "regular" Tony?! If that is indeed the case, could you write hcs for young!Tony as well? Like maybe it's the first time he's dealing with his girlfriend's period, maybe she gets it while at his place or something, idk? Also, i think maybe he'd end up asking Maria for advice on what to do hahah anyways, I'd love to read it if you're willing to write that - totally okay if you don't want to though, no pressure. And thank you anyway for your attention! Good day to you!
Aww ty! I considered doing something like that for younger Tony but wasn’t sure if there would be any interest at the time! Cue awkward Tony 🥺👉👈
Warnings: typical period stuff
💠He's,,, smart! He knows Things about Bodies! He knows you probably have a period, but he doesn't really think about it. Only when you outright have to tell him, or he'll assume he knows when you're on it because sometimes you're a little mean to him for no reason :( Or you're not hanging out with him because you feel bad... again! Or sometimes you'll randomly just start crying when he's hugging you and he'll freak out! Everyone knows the whole "haha, women are moody and PMSing" jokes, and it's not entirely wrong tbf, but he's too scared to actually ask, and doesn't actually know how bad it is. Plus, he never had siblings, nor has he been close enough with someone to know about all that, so he has less than basic knowledge about it and that's why he keeps his mouth shut about any and all of that
💠He doesn't really know when you have it, or for how long. And he doesn't really want to ask because that's kind of weird, right? And thinking about it does ick him out a little 🙄 But one day, the inevitable happens, and you're cursing yourself for not planning at all, or cursing your irregular cycle. Thank god Tony's bathroom is connected to his room, at least. You're awkwardly standing in the doorway, figuring out exactly what to ask while your poor boyfriend is staring back at you absolutely terrified because why are you just standing there looking at him? Surely there's nothing he could've done within such a short timespan!
"Tony, does your mom have any pads, or," you start a bit awkwardly, just getting straight to the point because you can only stand around for so long like this. "Or anything like that." You can tell you've confused him, but you knew Maria would understand when he relayed the message. "I, uh," he starts with a stutter, but he quickly understood with a raise of his brow. "Oh!" You'd laugh a little if you weren't literally bleeding, but at the very least you mouthed a thank you when he stood up.
💠But now he has a new obstacle: asking his mom about period stuff 😐 Surely she'll have whatever you need, right? She probably also goes through that? He doesn't really want to think about that or find out anyway. He knows he's probably making a bigger deal out of it than it is, but he doesn't really know much about it and it's a little weird to think about, okay 😔
💠Luckily it's just her in the room because he knows his dad will laugh at him 🤧
💠"Uh," he starts. He's like a deer caught in headlights, poor guy. "(Y/N) wanted me to ask you if, uh," he can't seem to get it out. His mothers turns to him questioningly, amusement in her smile. "If you had any pads, or," he finally get its out, just as you said it, "or something." Luckily she seems to pick up on it immediately, heading straight for her own bathroom with a shuffling Tony in tow. She's looking through drawers and asking if you feel okay, if you need anything else, can she do anything. It kinda makes him feel like an asshole because he didn't ask any of that… maybe it is that big of a deal?
"Should I- should I ask?"
His mother is looking at him like an idiot, and he knows he's completely missed something. "Yes?" She's holding something out to him that he assumes is… whatever you needed. He awkwardly takes it, not even trying to guess how it's used. Without thinking, and because of his mom's worry now worrying him, he asks a slightly silly sounding question. "Does it… hurt?" He looks so helpless that Maria can't help but laugh, but to answer his question: yes, sometimes it can. And make you sick. Or emotional. And lots of other things that sound pretty awful, and this is like- every month or so? "Okay," he can only reply with and shuffle back to his room, where you are probably wondering if he's gotten lost or something because it's been 10 minutes for one simple thing 🤨 But then you hear an awkward call of your name and quickly dart back to the door to snatch it from him.
💠Once you're back out, he's awkwardly asking you if you're like, okay? Do you need any, like, medicine? Again, his helplessness is chuckled at. Look, he's trying! You're probably fine at the moment and reassure him that you are, in fact, not dying! Though, give it another hour or so and you might feel like you are.
💠He may be a little weird about it, but definitely let him know if your bad mood or headache is because of your period! Mostly because he will absolutely worry that it's because of him :( And he'll also know to go a little easier on you and keep his own mood in check 🤧 He may not know much about it, but he's seen how awful it makes you feel, and knows more about how it makes you feel, and really wants to try and help!
💠Which leads to him being more clingy. He hates seeing you in any type of pain :(
💠It's probably a pretty common occurrence for you to decline his offer to go out when he randomly calls you. Of course he'll figure out that you don't feel good and all, and offer to get you anything. If you also decline that offer, he'll be a little sad, honestly. He just wants an excuse to come over still 🥺 and wants to help. So that's exactly what he does anyway! He knows where the spare key is and lets himself in, and he can't just go home when you're lying there in the dark :( even if you do groan in protest when he rolls in next to you, maybe even on you if you try to shuffle away for some personal space. He's wrapping his arms around you and going through a list of things he can do or things he can go get. Would this make you feel any better? What if he got your favorite candy? Oh, you feel too sick to eat :( Is him being on top of you making it worse? Oh, sorry :(
💠But he's still not going to completely let you go 😌❤ Even if you are a little ill about it and finding it hard to get comfortable, he is warm and safe and the kisses in your hair are sweet! Besides, once you're in his arms it's way too hard to try to leave
💠He loves the days when you are clingier! Because now he gets to be clingy without bothering you! You're always leaning against his shoulder, or laying in his lap. You're so comfortably cuddled into his chest, hopefully asleep. He's probably relieved that you're finally asleep, especially if you've been hurting or not getting much asleep because of it, and you can't get moody with him. But then, when he gets up to go do his own thing for a while, you're gripping at his shirt and looking at him so upset! And maybe you do this a lot, but he knows that you're tired and sad and in pain and all those bad things that you tell him feel a little better when he's around, so he can't help but give in again and just settle in for the rest of the night ❤️
💠If you want, you can get anything you want during this time. Well, you can get anything you want most of the time, but you won't have to plead as much and he'll go above and beyond! Do you want to stay in bed all day? He doesn't really want to go to class anyway! You want your favorite takeout? From that place downtown? At quitting time? And you don't want to go? … he'll sigh very hard, but he'll try his best to wrestle that New York City traffic for you and be back in decent time 🤧❤️ He'll even get your favorite treat along the way!
💠You may just casually state that your period is late one day, without a second thought. Tony's pretty sure his heart stopped and he's completely frozen. What does he say? What do you mean? As a guy, that really only means one thing to him, and he's not sure why you're so chill about it? Should he do something?? He can't be the only one freaking out about that, surely! He'll work up a meek "what does that mean?" or "Is that okay?" Something that avoids the specific question and makes him not sound petrified, hopefully. When you give other excuses like stress or let him know that it just ✨happens✨ sometimes, he'll be very relieved, but the next time you bring it up he'll still be a little scared but too embarrassed to ask again 😓
💠If you're actually sick, like, throwing up, he'll be pretty squeamish, but he'll help where he can! He doesn't like any sort of sickness, but he loves you or whatever so he'll suck it up for now
💠He really is sweet! And mostly helpful and comforting when he's not actually smothering you or pestering you with countless questions!
Bonus gif
#tony stark#tony stark x reader#tony stark imagine#tony stark one shot#tony stark headcanon#tony stark drabble#tony stark x fem!reader#tony stark x female reader#tony stark fic#tony stark fanfiction#iron man#iron man x reader#iron man imagine#iron man drabble#iron man fanfiction#iron man headcanons#marvel#marvel x reader#marvel headcanons
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There for you
Boba-Fett x reader
Sum: Your time spent under the Daimyo’s protection had made you cocky. Most of the planet knew you were Boba-Fett’s, what they didn’t know was that it came with vows and a ring. It’s better to let the people assume you were just a plaything the Daimyo liked to keep around. Supposedly it made you safer, obviously that didn’t work as well as Boba thought.
Tatooine has a reputation for being unforgiving at night. Not just from the pirates, smugglers, and all other types of shady characters. The weather would also be hard on any unprepared traveler. Harsh winds and low temperatures can turn even the most seasoned tracker around.
Your journey wasn’t supposed to take that long. You knew that path to the closest village and had crossed it many times. That didn’t stop you from being a target. By the time you realized the speeders were trained straight for you, it was already too late.
“Is this the right one?” A voiced asked, your captor faceless with the bag over your head.
“She matches the picture. Easier to grab than the sniper, definitely.” Another voice replied. This one seemingly female in it’s pitch. There’s a foot placed on your shoulder, pushing you down until your laying on your side. “Fett only has two. Let’s hope we didn’t grab his favorite.”
Your time spent under the Daimyo’s protection had made you cocky. Most of the planet knew you were Boba-Fett’s, what they didn’t know was that it came with vows and a ring. It’s better to let the people assume you were just a plaything the Daimyo liked to keep around. Supposedly it made you safer, obviously that didn’t work as well as Boba thought.
The male captor starts speaking again: “Takes us over past the ridge. Hide the ship while we work.”
“It’s not gonna be hidden for long once her master starts searching the dessert.” Another male voice said from further away. He was likely the pilot.
“We don’t need long.” The first male voice said. “Take her out, take the pics, dump the body. Done and done.”
Now you started screaming.
Smaller gangs and groups are always scrambling for what little foothold could be found. One way to show you mean business is through the girls and guys that tend to be on the arms of these groups. Capturing them, killing them, and then sending the pictures to the rival gang.
Usually these are side pieces or mistresses that aren’t hard to replace. Never spouses or mates that could cause harsh retaliation. When Jabba was still in control a few gangs had tried this with one or two of his slaves. They were quickly removed due to their annoyance, not for the attack on those women.
The boot on your shoulder moves to your head. Pressing down hard until you could feel the cool of the ship floor through the bag.
“Stop. Screaming.” She says, turning her foot to emphasize her point.
Both Fennec and Boba had offered to either get someone to make the run for you. But this village still needed a personal touch to keep the relationship between them and Mos Espa strong. Seeing the arm candy to the Daimyo coming up with the promised credits was one way to do it.
It wouldn’t take long for this ship to make it past the ridge. Long enough for you to think about how Boba would react when he got those pictures. That had you screaming all over again.
“I. SAID. STOP!” The female voice said again, a kick to your stomach.
You’re still recovering from the impact when the entire ship shakes. Metal and machinery rattles your entire world. Sending your head into jelly from being so close to the ground as it happens.
“Are you serious?!” The first male voice yells.
“Who is it? What is it?” Asked the female.
“If I knew I’d be firing back at it!” Screams the pilot. The ship rattles once more. “Kriff! Somethings’ hit the roof. Somethings on the roof!”
It’s suddenly much hotter inside the bag than it was just a seconds ago. Although the world is dark you can see the bright orange dot penetrating the ceiling. It traces into a circle, leaving behind a trail that lands with an outrageous THUD!
Panic erupts throughout the ship. You are only involved when the hood is ripped from your head. Leaving you staring straight at Fennec’s helmet.
“Just run, okay?” She says, smacking the wall just behind you. “Run.”
You didn’t need to be told twice. Fennec cuts free your ankles and off you go. Sprinting into the endless sand and countless stars. Not having a direction in mind, only away.
Wind was kicking up sand, making you blind and keeping your path a mystery. You didn’t make it very far. Only about three hundred feet before running into someone solid as a tree and just as strong.
“Hold tight,” Boba says, leaning down just enough to grab the back of your thighs.
You don’t have time to thank you. As the ground is already disappearing from beneath your feet.
Boba Fett’s jetpack wasn’t made for someone without armor. Meant to be used while wearing full garb: without a helmet the already whipping sand was that much harsher. Digging into your skin and hurting your eyes. The pack was attached to Boba, making his arms and your grip the only thing keeping you from falling and, at best, breaking your legs.
You only fly for a few minutes before little lights dance at the corner of your eye. Down below the bright colors of Mod bikes were waiting down below.
“We’re landing, brace yourself.” Boba says in an attempt to give comfort.
Three of the Mods gang were waiting when you touch down. While they gave you a glance, one even allowing a smile, they were too focused on Boba to greet you properly. You should be used to this treatment by now, they really only cared about the big man with the gun. Not on his wife standing off to the side.
“Take her home,” Boba ordered, an arm still around you. “Do not leave her side until you reach the palace. Understood?”
“You got it; we’ll keep her safe.” One of the members said. The one who had actually acknowledged you.
Boba turned towards you. “This won’t take long. I promise.”
It’s hard to feel the warmth and affection when he’s all dolled up in green and Beskar. Inside the armor he’s the Mos Espa protector, former bounty hunter, and destroyer of enemies. Obvious this made him one of the hottest things walking, but not the kind you run to to feel better about your situation.
That is the only reason you could give for letting him go. His helmet pressing his forehead against yours for a second before letting you go. He’s gone from sight by the time you straddled one of the bikes.
------------
Fett had liked having his elegance and space, it would seem. It took a few weeks before Boba was comfortable with bringing his guard down within the walls. It took some weeks to get that massive slug bed out and replace it with a proper mattress. Boba Had conceded on a large bed after his bacta tank was no longer needed.
The stone floor made it hard to near impossible to be sneaky. There would always be an echo from moving around. Whether wearing heels, boots, or in bare feet. This made it easy to hear Boba arrive from the balcony.
There’s no point in turning around to greet him. He would be able to see you through the arch way. He’d know you were waiting; he also knew you were wearing his robe.
Of course you had your own. But after everything it helped to have a little bit of him hanging off of your shoulders. It kept away the chill from your naked body underneath. Even dressing felt like too much after the quick shower.
It didn’t take long for Boba to remove his armor and weapons. Droids scurried around him to get everything off and put away correctly.
“Have you eaten?” Boba asks from the doorway.
You shook your head. “I honestly forgot. No point in waking up the kitchen because I was so late for dinner.”
“That’s what I’m paying them for.” Boba replies, disappearing for a second.
From the balcony you could see most of Mos Espa. At this time of night most of the lights were starting to turn off. Being replaced by the streetlights and headlights from bikes moving through the alleyways.
Past the city the desert stretched forever. Every now and then there was a little flicker from somewhere outside of the walls. Although they were mostly white, much like the stars, a few blinked red. Even from here you knew it was blaster fir. Watching them for too long almost had you hearing them being fired.
“I was feeling bantha tonight.” Boba says, stepping up to your side. “I made sure the steaks will be medium rare.”
“The only kind that’s allowed.” You replied, still staring out towards the blinking red.
Boba hesitates before placing a hand on your back. When he does you immediately lean against him. Giving the needed permission for Boba to pull you closer against his chest. Embracing on the balcony for anyone still awake to see and be jealous of.
After a moment Boba breaks the silence by asking; “Are you hurt?”
“Not enough to matter. Just a few bruises, especially on my ego.” You reply, turning your head up to look at him. “Are they dead?”
Boba has made a habit of always telling the truth. But only if you specifically asked. Had you just let the moment last, and never brought your captors up again, then he would have taken care of them without a moments hesitation.
“Not yet,” Boba said, turning his head to kiss your cheek. “I had Fennec keep the three alive. They hurt you, insulted my position, and embarrassed Fennec by taking you so brazenly. An example needs to be made, otherwise others may try this again.”
He speaks as if he were on his throne. Regarding a room full of citizens and opportunists alike. With a tone that kept everyone’s attention.
He had been sitting on that throne when you left. Stopping by to lean down and whisper that you were leaving. He had taken your hand and offered an escort, but his focus stayed on the farmer in near tears in front of him.
You can’t fault Boba for focusing on those in need over you. Because of this you didn’t insist on getting a kiss or feel the gentle touch of his helm against your forehead.
You remember this now. Smiling sweetly in a way you hadn’t done the entire night.
“I feel like tonight was a good reminder that I need a kiss goodbye, my dear.” You say, looking at his lips.
“My mistake.” Boba replies, going in for a kiss to make up for the one he had failed to give earlier.
The kiss starting off chaste and sweet. Boba waiting a second to ensure you were alright before going further. His hands sliding up your back, splaying his fingers over as much space as possible.
He moans when you step to closer. As if he were pleasantly surprised that you had chosen to only wear his robe this night. Not that he could say much else. Only wearing his short after having his armor and weapons removed. He was too focused on getting to you than whether or not he should put on some new clothes.
“Will you have me?” He asks between kisses.
“Yes, Boba, Yes.” You reassure. Biting at his lip to get his attention entirely. “Next time I get tied up; I want it to be by you. Only you.”
That did it. Just like before Boba lifted the back of your thighs. Setting you on the balcony’s edge, holding your hips hard to ensure that you felt as safe as possible. Or to distract you while he opens up the robe, bracing your chest against his to ensure that your mouths left for the least amount of time as possible.
“I won’t let you be hurt; I swear on my life, on my armor, on everything. I’m going to kill them.” Boba says, more for himself than you.
“Still alive, are they? I assumed they’re in the dungeons then?” You say, moving your arms for the robe to fall further open. Nothing was hidden now. And it was evident on Boba’s face as he stared at the body he’s seen a hundred times.
Boba nods when he realizes that you had asked a question.
“Then I want them to hear us.” You challenge. “Make them know that they failed. That I’m alive and that my screams don’t just come from fear.”
Boba doesn’t say anything, but you can see the change happen. His eyes focusing on yours for the briefest of seconds. Not that it mattered whether you knew his next actions or not, you were already being pulled forward, until your butt say on the ledges very edge. And Boba went to his knees before you.
Few in the galaxy had the privilege of experiencing both sides of Boba Fett. To know the difference between being fucked by Boba and making love with him.
He usually fucks when the day is long and there is nothing to say. The silence will be painful before he reaches your shared chambers. When you’re following right behind he’ll quickly take hold of your wrist, pulling you into the room as if you may escape if he’s not careful. If you’re already in the room he’ll be against your back without bothering to say hello.
His kisses are biting, and hands are rough on your skin. There won’t be enough time to get him armor off. Barely enough time to remove his gloves before he’s finding the opening in your clothes. Say nothing and every bit of his armor and weapons will be left on. The harsh material of his gloves pressing against your neck to keep you in place.
Making love is much more common. He’ll look at you with a slight tilt to his head. As if he couldn’t believe that this beautiful woman was his to have and to hold. He’ll verbally say this too, but only when he knows no one else can hear.
Everything will already be off when he comes to you. His hands are softer, they travel further, and take their time in mapping out the body he already knows.
Right here and now it’s somewhere in between. He bites the inside of your thighs but is gentle in guiding your leg. Resting it over his shoulder to stay out of the way as he travels forward. Nipping and biting while you grabbed onto the balcony for dear life.
“Oh, please.” You gasped out when his lips met your lower ones.
Starting off with soft, wet, bites between your lips. His mouth is so hot it boils your bloods. His hands squeezing the inside of your thighs send the entire world into overdrive. Your system working to make sure your body doesn’t shut down from all the licks, kisses, and touches that Boba wrecked through your body.
His tongue finally joins in and the teasing is over. He pushes up until you’re flat onto your back. The thick balcony edge able to cover your entire back. Making the only thing hanging off the edge.
He rumbles into your skin. Tip of his tongue exploring your entrance as if he were nervous to plunge in completely.
When he finally penetrates your sounds come out sharp. Gasping out into the open air, not caring if anyone down below stopped to hear. Boba moaning at the sounds you made. Sliding his hands up slowly in appreciation.
He builds your orgasm slowly. Wanting more so to taste, to feel, and to know this woman he was worshiping. In doing that he worry about going faster to reach the end. He didn’t want to.
Thick electricity and warmth travels through your body. Growing from your pelvis to your legs and chest. Pressing against your breasts, making your nipples sensitive to the light touch of the soft robe.
You don’t realize the orgasm has reached it peak until your eyes aren’t able to focus. Your thighs closing around Boba’s head without your permission. He grunts at the squeeze but doesn’t stop. If anything he starts to go faster, lick deeper, and downright bite softly at your lips until he gets his goal of your voice.
And voice you did. Head thrown back, crying out to Mas Espa. What you were saying didn’t make much sense. You were calling out Boba’s name, thanking him, begging for more, and pleading with him not to stop.
You wouldn’t have known it at the time, but three passersby had stopped just below your balcony. Young people heading home after a late-night shift. Stopping when hearing the sounds of a loud woman. Taking a moment or two to realize they were shouts of pleasure rather than distress.
“Good for her,” One of the passersby had said. Continuing on her way, now more excited than ever to make it back to her own husband.
Boba stays close as your orgasm finally dies down. Slotting firmly between your thighs, gently stroking the outside of your thighs. Only reaching further up when you finally found the strength to bring your head up.
“Do you feel any better?” Boba asks, reaching out to help pull you up into a sitting position.
He’s so sweet when he allows the concern to reach his face. It reminds you of why you took the risk of becoming more than just a lover to Boba Fett. He had looked at you with such genuine emotions that it was intoxicating. And you were drunk on him.
“Yes, my love, so much better.” You sigh, reaching out for his head. Pulling him in to press your foreheads together. “Now let me do the same for you.”
He doesn’t take advantage of your want to please like he usually would. In the large bed he lays you down gently. Finally taking away the robe and dragging his lips and his hands over every piece of you that he was allowed.
Although it was only the other that you were taken by him, it felt like an eternity. His cock slid through your folds once, twice, before finding your entrance. Pressing in with gentle pressure that through your head back and opens your legs for whatever Boba could dream of doing.
“Love you, love you so much.” Boba whispers in your ear.
You don’t need to reply, he already knows. Instead you place an arm around his neck. Keeping him close as his thick cock splits you open. He rubs your insides raw with powerful thrusts that jiggles your entire body. Keeping a tempo that reaches the deepest part of your body.
Sex with Boba wasn’t always this good. Your first time was fast, clumsy, and ended with dissatisfaction on your end. Something that Boba rectified when he realized, but it felt more like a responsibility rather than part of the fun.
It took time to figure eachother out this well. Your wedding night Boba had asked you to explain what you liked, what you wanted, and what he could do. The first hour coming off like a business meeting you had to attend before being allowed to leave for the weekend.
“Ready?” Boba asks with a husky voice.
“Yes, please.” You reply, body already singing with want for another orgasm.
He leans back from you. The room now freezing without his body to lay against. Still you kept your hands on his wrists, keeping contact as he takes hold of your hips. Pushing you up and down the bed to slam into his hips with a vigor that couldn’t be made from the previous position.
You made a move to massage your own clit, but Boba practically growled. Using his own hand to do the job for you. Although he moved sloppily, with barely a sense of rhythm. But that almost made it better.
Boba has a powerful body. And he uses it to destroy you in a way that can’t be replicated anytime soon. Mixture of the rapid penetration and the massaging of your clit brought that electric warmth traveling through your body once more.
This time you were fully aware of it. Arching your back as if this would make it travel faster, reach your goal at the same time that Boba found his.
Although this didn’t happen it was close enough. Your clenching pussy from another orgasm was just enough for Boba to reach his own edge. Sending him hunching over your body as he orgasmed. Slowly pumping into you as his orgasm rolls through him.
He speaks so softly, so deeply, that you didn’t understand all that he was saying. Although you caught the tail end of terms of endearment and your own name. That was really all you needed to know.
“Come here,” You demand of him when he rolls off.
He does as you ask. Rolling over to make room for you to slide into his arms. Your head tucked under his chin. Sweat and cum staining the sheets that would need to be cleaned later. In a few hours the feeling of it between your thighs would become annoying, but that was for later.
In only a few moments Boba kisses your hairline and says; “I want you in armor.”
“What?” You ask, lifting your head to look at him properly.
He’s looking over you the same way he does when planning. “You need better protection than I can provide. You need armor.”
It’s almost a show how he throws the blanket off of himself. Getting out of the bed and taking his robe with him. Leaving you naked in the bed, a little confused but also excited.
-----
It took a week for your armor to be ordered and finished. Boba spared no expense on materials and design. Getting his new buddy Din Djarin involved when Din started asking questions about your husband’s sudden need of beskar.
Your former captors were kept alive during that week. Fennec made it a point to personally stop by everyday to deliver their food and water. She never said anything, just made sure they knew their deaths would come eventually.
That day came in the late hours of the day. Your captors dragged from their cell by Fennec and marched into the throne room. Standing side by side in chains before the Daimyo.
With Fennec taking her place on Boba’s right, you stood on his left. Staying quiet behind your new helmet of refined beskar. The breast plate, shoulder pads, and leg protection hid your identity pretty well. Especially since you hadn’t gotten the chance to paint and personalize it in your own style yet.
“My lord, we didn’t mean-.” One of your captors started but was quickly silenced by Boba’s raised hand.
“Don’t insult me further by lying.” He said. “You three have already done that enough. Not just to me, but to my right hand, and to my wife.”
This was the moment you chose to remove your helmet. It was a dramatic moment to see your captors become the ones with fear in their eyes. When they came in they just assumed you were some random mercenary, not their victim.
“They made me!” The female captor shouted. “Please, I didn’t want to do it!”
“Oh, shut up. It was her Kriffing plan!” Shouted the captor in the middle. He had been the pilot.
The two started to argue with raised voices and begging pleas. Only one of the captors stayed quiet. His eyes downcast and body lax. A man who had accepted his fate.
Fennec stops the argument with a single shot at their feet.
“Watch the fire to the ground,” Boba told Fennec. “I don’t want you hitting him by mistake.”
“My apologize,” Fennec says, smiling at her prey.
Down, below the captors feet, Boba rancor waited. He didn’t get his breakfast this morning, and it was only now that he decided to whine about it.
“Please,” The captor, the pilot, whispered towards you. “I’m sorry.”
“Three insults, three prisoners, three punishments.” Boba says, calling their attention to him although he was talking to you and Fennec. “Only fair that we each get to pick a fate.”
You nodded in agreement, but it was still hard to find your voice in this moment.
Boba turns to Fennec first: “What would you-.”
He doesn’t get to finish. Fennec leaning forward and pressing down the throne’s switch. Instantly the middle captive, the pilot, dropped from this world. His screams echoed through the halls in a way that hadn’t happened since the age of Jabba the Hutt.
You don’t have to look over to know that Boba’s pet finally got his breakfast. A loud crunch and the silencing of screams confirmed that.
“You didn’t let me finish.” Boba told Fennec.
“I’m sorry, I got excited.” Fennec explained.
At this point the female captor was sobbing. Begging for her life and screaming at her co-conspirator for getting them into this mess.
She only stops when a blast fire from Boba’s hand. A single shot between her eyes that threw her body backwards. Slamming onto the floor in a head the shape of a corpse. Her tears were still wet when she died.
You couldn’t look away from her body. Staring at was once the greatest threat to your life, now gone from this world thanks to your husband. The name that now reached out for your hand and took it so gently you were surprised.
“You don’t have choose,” He says, pulling you closer to whisper properly. “You don’t have to do anything. Ever.”
The last captor still stands without looking at anything. He moves slowly to stand over the trap door. Although his slow movements don’t keep Fennec from drawing her weapon.
He now looks up at you. Knowing what you wanted to do, and practically begging you to do it.
It’s quiet in the throne room. Boba not wanting to push you, Fennec too curious to say anything, and the guests far too scared to make a single noise. Only the moving of the rancor down below kept the world moving.
Without thinking, or even trully deciding, you pressed down on the trap door. Leaning across Boba’s lap to do so. Looking away as your last captor drops through the door and into the hands of a beloved pet.
It was only then did the throne room make noise. Someone cheering and another joining in started the party that you weren’t expecting to happen. Fennec looked over to Boba, waiting to be told to shut it down.
“Let them enjoy,” Boba says, “Join them if you’d like.”
Fennec does just that. Stepping down where one of the twi’lek beauties were waiting for her.
You stay close to Boba, maneuvering to sit on his lap. Your helmet being placed back on to rest against his shoulder. His arms pulling you close with a hand on your shoulder and another on your knees.
“I’m sorry,” He whispers. Although it wasn’t his fault it’s nice that he still wanted to make it better. In everyway he can.
#reader insert#Boba-fett#boba fett#boba fett x reader#Fennec shand#the book of boba fett#Rancore#IDK what the rancor's name is#star wars#Reader is spoiled by Boba#Protective boba fett#Soft Boba#fluff#angst#Mentioned Din Djarin#star wars imagine
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sexuality, in general, isn't entirely alien to kira. however, this isn't to say that he's well-versed in the subject, either. moreover, it's a "concept" that he himself finds much interest in-- inherently, it is something that he's never thought much of. it is neither a complicated nor simple subject matter in his perspective and, as such, obligates him to barely (like skimming your finger across the water's surface.) indulge with.
for the majority of his life, kira more or less understood sexuality in a very black and white manner: heterosexual was assumed as default unless otherwise stated. nowadays, he still tends to lean this way (it's not intentional but, rather, it's subconscious.) though will occasionally "catch" himself and correct accordingly. again, though, this isn't a huge priority of his and is treated as such. it's not so much necessity but something he's learned to "keep in mind" for sake of keeping up with society and its ever-changing economics.
to say that kira identified as heterosexual, however, would be oversimplifying his own journey. he never bothered to give it much thought, instead assuming he was the "default" sexuality. so, in a way, he did identify as heterosexual but not by cause of his own exploration or anything of the sort. kira yoshikage was straight because, by basic deduction, everyone else around him was, also, straight.
there was no reason for him to explore this side of himself as there was, objectively, no purpose to doing so. he found that he was attracted to women (or, at risk of sounding pedantic, their hands more-so.) and left it at that. whenever he was made to share a space with a man andor those that leaned towards the masculine end of the spectrum, he felt nothing.
the thought of glancing at a man's hand never crossed his mind.
whenever he was in the presence of a woman, however? there was always that inherent -- insidious as it was, a man's libido was not to be trifled with -- urge (it wasn't a curiosity. it was necessary, hardwired into him like some sort of... code.) to look. even if it were a fleeting glance? that was more than enough. stealing only a glimpse of a woman's hands was proof to kira that his sexuality was unmistakably rigid and straight; it was once a fact that brought him an eerie sense of comfort.
he didn't take pride in "being" heterosexual. rather, it was the fact that he understood himself and no longer had to ponder on it. additionally, there was an unspoken sort of agreement between him and society that he was "just like everyone else". it helped him feel normal-- or, well, what the most barebones idea of "normal" was.
while many others, boys especially, would discover their various preferences (kinks, fetishes, spank bank, and everything in-between.) through expected means such as magazines, television, cinema, or, of course, pornography? kira found his comfort in the likes of the mona lisa. once again, too, he didn't give it any further thought. she was a woman (or was, at least, depicted as such.) and, due to that, helped kira realize his own tastes and come to terms with them all the quicker.
her existence expedited the process and, for that, kira thought it appropriate to express at least a modicum of gratitude. not much, mind you. she was just a painting, after all.
as it happens, he was at peace with himself and his orientation. by cause and effect, there was no need whatsoever for him to pursue further. he was fine with presenting as the "default", even if it meant dealing with the occasional "hey, what's your type, yoshikage?" ("i prefer them in pieces," is what he thinks but says, instead, "blondes, i suppose.") opener. it was a small price to pay (sometimes he prefers brunettes. other times he likes redheads.) in exchange for the ultimate comfort: peace and quiet.
however, things rarely stay the same forever.
kira might've or might've not learned this the hard way.
he's still deciding.
meeting one kishibe rohan -- in an unexpected and harrowing way, both in time and place -- certainly wasn't what kira thought to be his "awakening", as some might put it. due to his relationship with rohan, taking place over the course of more than just a couple of months (it feels like years, stuck in place like a mouse in a trap.) whilst leaving the two of them no room to compromise, kira had no choice but to adapt. maybe improvise and overcome would've come next, but they never did. it'd just be a waste of time and energy now.
it's difficult to say if kira himself actively identifies as bisexual, considering his attraction for rohan (both inside and outside, outwardly and internally, til death do they part.) appears to be... individualistic. he, to this day, doesn't feel much for others of the same sex or gender as he is but tends not to dwell. there could be, perhaps, the simple excuse of, "why would i want to be attracted to any man other than him?" which has become a much needed source of comfort.
this isn't to say kira's "attraction" towards women (it's the chase-- the act of fixing them and teaching them.) has dwindled, but he has managed to adjust his trajectory. he no longer considers himself a bachelor -- though, if asked and if it's the easier option, he will... sometimes say it if only to escape a conversation quicker -- and actively rejects a woman's "advances" (naughty, naughty girl! can't she see he's already taken, happily engaged forever and ever and then some?) whenever put on the spot.
this, of course, applies to women with a full body and those without.
although, at that point? it's just common sense and needn't be said.
because of the execution of said journey into discovery and the lack of education from kira's part, it's hard for him to give a direct answer on his orientation. he's thankful for, at the very least, that it doesn't seem to come up in conversation often. being asked on if he's seeing someone and answering honestly is a far easier task than actually having to explain one's self, and he's already experienced it a few too many times. reactions weren't as strong as he might've expected (he's heard slurs fly around like candy at a parade, derogatory comments made by the same men who asked him what kind of girl he likes.) but it's safer for him to, simply put, avoid the risk altogether.
the idea of liking someone of a similar caliber ("but we're both men," kira remembers saying, feeling like he walked straight out of a romcom. he wanted to kill himself once realizing, the feeling intensifying when rohan snorted before bursting out into laughter.) as he doesn't necessarily bother kira. moreover, it's the idea that he's no longer presumed as the "default" and wonders if that turns him into a target. rohan himself is confident and open-minded, proudly displaying himself to the world. maybe it's because he doesn't care. he's found himself wondering, because of this, if rohan himself was never seen as "normal" anyway. perhaps it didn't bother him in the first place.
it's not envy that he feels towards this potential. he just wonders why it's so easy for someone else other than him. what makes it a bigger and harder pill to swallow, too, is that he knows a solution for this conundrum just doesn't exist.
to this day, kira doesn't think much about his sexuality. it's both a conscious and subconscious decision, done to prevent any further misgivings and an unintentional foray into a place he just... doesn't understand. fear and worry, too, might be a partial factor.
life is so much easier, after all, if you just go with the flow.
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The problems with the DC fandom's potrayals of Jason Todd
Hi,hello!!You might recognize me as that one Jason selfshipper who's self-insert is a pink Super that's always making shitposts and drawing parallels because autism go brrrr.If not,then that's a pretty good summary of my blog for newcomers!But today,i'm here to talk about a serious matter involving Jason and the bad depictions of him by fanon.As an autistic person who has the Batfam as one of his biggest spinterest,it's incredibly important and personal to me that Jason be done justice not just by canon but by the fans too.Which as you probably guessed by the title,dosen't happen very often.And i want to get into why and how that is!This ride is gonna be a bit long so buckle in
So to start off,the most blantant one:Making him into a misogynist who treats women badly based off their gender.Jason is an asshole and edgelord but that does not equal hating women and he's proven that many times.Has he been rude to characters who're girls?Yes but not once has he used their gender against them.You don't see him throwing around 'bitch' or the sexual kinds of insults(such as 'whore')towards them and that's because it's not a part of his character and never has been.When he was Robin,he showed such strong respect towards girls of all ages to the point where it was all but outright stated he was willing to push a man off a roof because he SA'd a woman and even as Red Hood,he never looses that as seen by his treatment of Talia and his female love interests.The idea that a guy being 'manly' means he must also be sexist perpetuates toxic masculinity and it's messed up to erase male characters being feminists(for lack of a better term)because you buy in it
To continue off that,the headcanon that he's a horndog who sleeps around is also a direct contradiction of his character.Jason is not actively interested in a relathionship for himself and he has shown this across pretty much all his incarnations in his actions and at least in the case of Rhato,his words too:
And the pervert sense of humor?Straight up made up out of thin air by non-comic readers.I get it,he's very hot,i agree with that very much,but assuming he must also be a sleaze because of it is making extremely weird assumptions.Attractive dosen't mean overly sexual and i don't think i have to explain why it's bad to change him being a total prude to a player because you believe it does,even more so since it's crystal clear that his reluctance towards intimacy is a trauma response.I get that people have different coping mechanisms but they're not interchangable and you're erasing rep by switching Jason's for another one
There's also how he barely drinks alcohol-there's actually a gag of him as Robin where he orders milk at a bar-and hasn't been shown to particularly be into smoking but guess what two of the most popular things he's shown enjoying in fanon are.Ironically enough,he's a huge literature nerd who's unashamed of and shows off his love for books and was implied to be into theater as a kid and guess what again?Those get stolen and given to Tim instead(*Flashbacks to Btas*).It's been shown that in the DC verse,it takes smarts to be a succesful vigilante and/or villain(the former of which Jason is and the latter of which he was for a long ass time)and he's ABSOLUTELY not just getting by on luck.Almost the entierty of Utrh wouldn't have happened if he wasn't a genius.Is he brutal?Yes,so much.Is he a brute?Not in the slightest bit
All this culminates in a particular and very big ick i have when it comes to fanon Jason:How all this combined with the latino hc for him turns him into a walking stereotype of my people.Latino Jason means the world to me,especially if he's also black,and it breaks my heart that gringos have sullied it with their lack of research and fetishization of him but that'll never stop me from reclaiming it and making it into the beautiful rep i know it is!Back on track:This point is something that under no circumstances should be let slide,it's racist fullstop.Reactions to it should only be either 1)attempting to educate or 2)blocking.If you disagree,please just do the blocking towards me
And the last thing i'd like to adress is his relathionship with Bruce:Jason does NOT have 'd*ddy issues',he has TRAUMA.It's one thing to joke about him wanting Bruce to love him so bad he became evil and being petty asf towards him,i actually love that type of humor,and it's a whole nother to be an ableist jackass because Jason wasn't all sunshine and rainbows when he found out his dad didn't avenge his death at FIFTEEN by a guy who does shit like domestic abuse and is a deviant who's not afraid to act on his thoughts.Don't take this as Bruce bashing,as i am aware that this is the fault of the writers bigotry and hating on him squicks me out
What i'm trying to say is:Jason Todd is a much better character than he's given credit for and i hope this helps him get it,even if just a little bit
#cw for dark topics#jason todd#pro jason todd#robin#red hood#batfam#teen titans#ditf#lost days#utrh#rhato#the outlaws#wfa#teen titans:damian edition#dead sidekicks force#team dual#the anomalies#black jason todd#latino jason todd#afrolatino jason supremacy#also trans and bi and aspec + adhd/mdd/autistic!!#anti batcest#antisladejay#antijayroy#antijaykory#antideadonmain#antiangermanagement#jaysumm#real self shipping hours#letters from summer
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