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hwabang · 8 months

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Break Up + Make Up - Yang Jungwon

Summary: You ended your relationship with Jungwon because HYBE told you to. After a lot of mutual heartbreak and some dangerous situations, you realize this was all a big stupid fucking misunderstanding

Genre: angst + fluff ending

Warnings: fem!reader, idol!reader x idol!jungwon, '03 reader, established relationship, breakup, cursing, arguing, dieting, fainting, starvation, mention of weight, bad eating habits, slight mentions of poor mental health, hospital, mention of sasaeng/crazy engenes lol, reader breaks jungwon's heart but temporarily!, one slight mention of reader not being korean, exes to lovers

Author’s Note: feeling angsty lol. i kinda wanna make "break up + make up" a series for the enhypen members i write for, let me know if you'd be interested!

Word Count: ~ 6k (oop)

NOTICE: (the names used for side characters are fake names, with the exception of the enhypen members. the fake names don't represent any real life characters.)

(gif not mine!)

You and Jungwon have been dating for 4 months now, but you two have been in love with each other for a while. The only thing that had stopped you from dating earlier is the fact that Jungwon's a year younger than you, and neither of you wanted to talk about the feelings until he became an adult in Korea.

Unfortunately, last month some pictures of you and Jungwon on a date were leaked, but your companies decided to go ahead and confirm the relationship since both ENHYPEN and your group were doing quite well right now. You were expecting the hate from crazy fans, but you weren't expecting as much support as you guys were getting. It was an overwhelming amount of love and you two couldn't be more happier.

People who didn't know you and Jungwon would say you two are moving too fast, but the ones who know you well know that you two have been head over heels in love with each other for so long. Sure, your relationship is very established and you two are really serious for a 4 month couple, but who cares? You and Jungwon are taking it at the pace that feels right, and since you two are fully committed to each other and love each other immensely, nothing wrong with moving "too fast".

Currently you were tidying up your dorm with the rest of your members. Today marks the first couple of days you guys get off, and some cleaning of the dorm was much needed right now so that was everyone's first task. After this you were prepared to spend the next 4 off days with your precious Wonnie.

"Hey Y/N," your bandmate Mijeong called out, walking back into the dorm. "Come here?"

You turned the sink off and patted your hands dry then walked into the living room. "Yeah what's up?"

"I just went to pick up our mail and you have a letter from HYBE."

You furrowed your eyebrows in confusion. "HYBE? And it's addressed to me?"

"Yeah, look." She handed the letter to me while sorting through everything else.

"Huh that's weird.. I'll open it later. Anything else for me?"

"Uh.. no more letters, but the front desk said you have a package from (your/country) downstairs; maybe your parents sent you something."

You nodded relaying the information. "Great, I'll go pick it up later. Thanks Mijeong-ah."

You went back to washing and drying the dishes; your last task for today. Once you were done, you took the letter up to your room. Your roommate was doing the laundry so you had a couple minutes to yourself. You sat on your bed and sighed, opening the letter not thinking much of it. Oh how wrong you were.

"Y/N-ssi,

"Hello, this is HYBE Corporation.

We are sending you this letter to inform you that you must end your relationship with our artist, ENHYPEN's Jungwon, as soon as possible.

The relationship being out in the public has decreased ENHYPEN's popularity and put our artists' safety at risk. Furthermore, Jungwon-ssi seems to be losing his focus a lot more after your relationship started. You both have worked very hard to get where you are; we wouldn't want either of your careers being sabotaged because of this relationship.

We kindly request that you end your relationship with him without letting him know that we have asked you to do so. Once you have done so and Jungwon-ssi lets us know, HYBE will personally put out a statement confirming your breakup to the public.

We understand that this might be tough for you to do so. It is solely for the sake of both your group's and ENHYPEN's careers that you all worked so hard for. Idols don't date for this reason; it's quite hard to maintain personal and professional lives. If you start to receive backlash or dangerous threats for the breakup, HYBE Corporation will provide you and your members with top notch security.

Thank you for understanding and for your cooperation.

Best regards,

HYBE Corporation & ENHYPEN Team"

Hot tears were streaming down your face. HYBE wants you to breakup with Jungwon without letting him know they're the reason for the breakup? HYBE were the ones who coerced your company into agreeing to confirm the relationship!

So many things were going through your mind.

You didn't wanna do this; Jungwon would NEVER wanna do this.

However...

You knew ENHYPEN were in danger because of this. Not only did all the past idol-dating horror stories scare you, but you knew haters were sending trucks to HYBE asking them to remove Jungwon from the group.

You can't let Jungwon's dream be sacrificed.

So many things were going through your mind.

But you knew what had to be done.

After a text to Jungwon asking him if you could go over to his dorm tonight, you asked the rest of his members to give you and Jungwon the dorm to yourselves for about 30 minutes.

"Oh?" Heeseung exclaimed and you could practically hear the smirk on his face. "Y'all really can't get enough of each other huh?"

You couldn't even crack a fake smile at his joke so you just shook your head, as if he could see it. "No it's not that.. we have something to talk about."

Heeseung abruptly stopped laughing and it felt as if his entire demeanor changed"What's wrong? Did something happen?"

"N-no not really.. I just really need to talk to him."

"Something happened. Talk to me Y/N-yah. What's wrong?"

You couldn't do anything but shake your head. "'Im fine Oppa, really. There's just a conversation Jungwon and I need to have that's why I need the dorm for a bit. Just half an hour.. please?" Without hesitation he agreed to get the members out of the dorm for a bit.

8pm finally came around and you rang the doorbell. The door was swung open and you were greeted by a beaming cheeky smile on his face. "Hi sweetie!"

Immediately he wrapped his arms around your waist and you wrapped yours around his neck, hugging him tightly, knowing this would be the last one.

"H-hey Jungwon-ah.."

He moved to the side as you let yourself in, taking your shoes off and walking into the living room behind him. He looked so excited to see you here.. little did he know you were about to break his fragile heart.

"You know," he started. "I was fully prepared for our mini vacation to start tomorrow, but I'm so happy you came over tonight! Now we have even more time together!"

You gave him a sad smile. "Yeah about that.. that's what we need to talk about."

Still his smile didn't fully fade, he only tilted his head a little. "What happened? Sudden schedule? Plans with your other friends? We can still make a little time for each other baby, no worries."

"No it's not that.. you might wanna sit down."

Now Jungwon was worried, worrying that something really bad happened to you as you hadn't smiled once since you walked through the door. He sat down cautiously right next to you. "What happened princess?" he cooed and held your chin gently. "Who's got my baby so sad, hmm?"

His caring nature brought tears to your eyes but you quickly wiped them away. "Jungwon.. I.. I want to break up."

Time felt like it stopped for Jungwon. It felt as if everything stopped; his breath, his heart, even the trees that were blowing in the breezy wind out his window felt like they were frozen in place.

".. What are you saying baby?" he said slightly chuckling. "If this is one of your pranks again–"

"It's not. I'm serious.. I want to break up."

Jungwon's facial expression was unreadable. Was he angry? Sad? Disappointed? You don't know. But whatever it was, it was far from him being okay with this.

"Okay," Jungwon sighed. He closed his eyes, took a deep breath, and looked back into your eyes. "Let's talk this through. What happened that made you feel like you need to take such a drastic decision?"

Of course you had thought about what your reason was gonna be. You knew Jungwon well enough to know that whatever the reason was, he'd opt to working it out with you versus losing you. There was only one reason that would hurt him enough, reassure him enough that the breakup wasn't a haste decision; a reason that would make him not want to be near you at all which is what needed to happen.

"..I fell out of love with you."

If the feeling of time stopping was what Jungwon felt when you sprung the break up on him, he didn't know what the hell this feeling was now. "Y-you what?? You.. don't love me?"

You were never a good liar; your trembling voice usually gave away your true intentions. How could you blatantly lie to your lover? Just by simply nodding of course.

"Say something Y/N-yah." Jungwon's jaw slightly clenched, you could tell he was holding back an enormous amount of emotions. "Y-you can't just.. you can't just walk in here after 4 happy months and tell me you don't love me anymore!"

Jungwon's shouting never scared you. He couldn't yell at you the way he yelled at his members. You were too precious for him. "W-what do you want me to say, Jungwon.. f-feelings change."

"At least look at me while you break my heart."

You finally looked up at him to see him in a state that clearly meant he's about to break down; hands balled into fists, tears welled up in his beautiful boba eyes, jaw clenched yet somehow a slight pout formed on his lips, said lips quavering with sobs ready to come out.

"I'm looking at you.. d-do you believe me now, huh?" Your voice got a little loud at the end; you were getting defensive. You just wanted this to end. Not the relationship, but this conversation. You didn't want him to fight for you, ask you anymore questions. You just wanted to go home and cry your heart out.

Jungwon shook his head, the tears starting to fall and the quaver of his lips getting rougher. "N-no. I can't believe it. Not when we both waited so long! S-so long to finally be together.. Not when you tell me and show me every single day that you love me, and that you'll always be here for me. N-not when we've talked about a future together! Y/N, fuck, why are you doing this?!"

All his tears rushed out as soon as yours did. You whimpered, not being able to hold the sobs nor the intense eye contact with him. Your eyes went back to your lap where your fingers were playing with the hem of your shirt. "I-it's the truth Jungwon.. Like I said.. feelings change..."

"And yours changed in a couple hours?" he challenged as he stood up from the couch. "You were texting me about our plans tomorrow, telling me you can't wait to spend your days off with the love of your life!"

"I-I know what I said Yang Jungwon!" you screamed, also getting up from your seat. "You don't have to remind me."

His eyes widened. "Y-Yang Jungwon? When did you.. when do you ever call me by my full name?"

"What do you want me to call you, huh? I'm breaking up with you for God's sake!"

"So why are you crying, baby?! You're breaking up with me because you don't love me but you can'd do it without crying??" Jungwon stepped closer to you, grabbing one of your hands and intertwining your fingers. "Something's off.. w-what's going?"

You had to amp your acting skills up; you realized Jungwon knew you too well. "Nothing's going on! God, I'm just an emotional person and you know this! Just because I don't love you anymore doesn't mean I'm not gonna miss having a boyfriend! That's why I'm crying Jungwon; because of the memories and the romantic feelings not because of you!"

Jungwon winced, clearly hurt by your harsh words. You wanted to pull him into you, but you knew damn well you couldn't do it.

"What is it? What made you fall out of love with me? Is it th lack of time? The publicity? Are you still hung over about me being a year younger? God, it's not even that much.. I've been doing my best to not let you feel it, no?"

"Jungwon, it's none of that. I'm just.. n-not into you anymore."

"Bullshit," he spat. "I don't believe it for a second. I know you're fucking into me."

You shook your head, knowing this was going nowhere. Jungwon would fight for your relationship no matter what and you knew it damn well. "W-whatever Jungwon.. that's the only reason I came here. D-don't contact me anymore after this." You turned to walk towards the door. You had to get out of here before you cave in.

You didn't get far, Jungwon immediately grabbing your wrist and turning you towards him. His tears were coming in faster, dribbling down his neck into his pajama shirt. "Is someone making you do this?"

Jackpot.

You tried not to show it in your face; trying to use what you learned from the one and only acting session your company made you do. "What are you on about now."

"Is someone making you do this," he repeated. "Are you being threatened? Were you influenced?.. No fucking way.. tell me HYBE didn't do this..."

You pulled your hand out of his group. "How easy do you think I am, that I'll get influenced by someone else to breakup with you?"

Very, apparently.

"Get it through your head Yang Jungwon; I don't want to be with you anymore."

You turned around again to leave but were immediately pulled into a firm chest. Jungwon wrapped his arms around you as he weeped into your shoulder, his anger now turning into complete sadness.

"Y-Y/N-yah.." he whimpered. "Please.. d-don't leave me.. you were the missing piece in my life that I needed to be 100% happy! You're my lifeline.. h-how can I survive without my lifeline..."

He turned you around to face him, his hands on your shoulders. Your heart was already broken, but the pieces broke into even smaller, microscopic ones once you saw the kicked puppy look on his face with the biggest pout and the biggest teardrops. "I-it's okay if you don't love me anymore. I-I'll do my best to make you fall in love with me again. I'll do whatever I need to, just d-don't go..."

You shouldn't change yourself for anyone Jungwon-ah, you wanted to say.

You wanted to say a lot, mainly how this is all a lie; how you still love him.

But you couldn't.

You shouldn't.

You shoved his hands off of you. "Just let me go Goddammit!"

He was taken aback by your actions and voice volume. "Y/Y/N.."

You pinched the bride of your nose, letting out a sigh that sounded annoyed. "Yang Jungwon, do you hear me? We're. Done. I don't want to be with you anymore." You went to put your shoes on as he followed you with slumped shoulders, a mantra of your name falling from his lips. "Delete my number. This is goodbye Yang Jungwon."

"Y/N!"

You ran out of his dorm and straight into the van that was waiting for you. As the door closed, you let all the tears and sobs out. Your heart cried loudly, you screamed into your hands as you couldn't control your tears.

A tissue box was handed to you. "Here," a soft voice said. You took the tissue boxes without looking up at your manager. "You alright?"

You shook your head. "I can't be Leo... I-I love him so much! I hated telling him that I don't!"

Leo gave you a sad smile, sighing as he started the engine up. "I don't understand why HYBE would do this.. maybe Jungwon really was losing focus.. whatever it is, you'll be okay in the end Y/N."

You got back to the dorms and all of your members sensed something horribly wrong. They followed you to yours and Haydee's shared bedroom and forced the story out of you.

Mijeong smacked the desk she was sitting at out of anger. "Why would HYBE do that?! It makes no sense!"

Your youngest member Jaein was sitting right next to you, letting you cuddle into her as she rubbed your back. "It really doesn't... HYBE can't be that ruthless, right?"

You shrugged, sitting up from your position and looking straight at Haydee. "I know you're good friends with Jake. He'll definitely contact you. He can't know anything about HYBE contacting me, please."

Your prediction turned out right as an hour later, Haydee's phone rang with Jake's name displaying on the bright screen. She went downstairs onto the street to answer the call, not wanting to discuss it near you as it's a fresh wound. "Yeah Jake."

"Yoi~ what the hell is going on?"

'I don't know," Haydee sighed. "How much have you heard from Jungwon?"

"Well, he wouldn't talk at first. When we came back to the dorm he was on the floor in the living room, in like a fetus position and crying a fuck ton. It took some coaxing from Jay for him to tell us that Y/N came over and broke up with him because she doesn't love him anymore.. but that's not the full truth, is it Dee?"

Haydee was conflicted, but girl code first; she knew it well. "Look, I'm not gonna add more fuel to the burning fire.. It's not my place to discuss this with you but whatever Y/N did, she did for a reason."

"She still loves him though right? Just tell me that much so I can comfort him."

"I was told specifically not to tell you jack shit bro."

Jake groaned. "Fine fine.. whatever you or Y/N or anyone says I refuse to believe it. All of us refuse to believe it; no way Y/N's out of love with Jungwon. They're a match made in heaven!"

"And I agree Jake, but we can't really do much besides be there for them."

"Nah you're right.. Uh, Jungwon wanted me to tell you one thing though. It's actually a favor."

"Yeah, what is it?"

"Don't let Y/N forget to take care of herself. We both know.. actually everyone knows, how bad this girl is at taking care of herself. So he just wanted me to tell you and the rest of the girls to take extra care of her."

"Yeah Jake, tell Jungwon and the rest of the guys we'll be keeping an eye out on her. Nothing will get passed us."

And that's where Haydee was wrong. It had been about 15 days since the breakup and so much had changed.

HYBE announced the breakup the same day and since then, the hate towards Jungwon had stopped completely. HYBE stated the reason for the breakup to be conflicting schedules, so neither party would get hate.

Another thing that changed though, was you. You had done a weight check-in today and your managers were shocked to see you lost 10 lbs in two weeks.

"I'm fine Leo," you repeated for the fifth time as he walked behind you into the convenience store. "Stop babying me, you're a year older than me."

"This is literally my job Y/N. Let me do my job."

You rolled your eyes and went to the snack section, picking up a pack of saltine crackers. "Then let me do mine. I'm an idol, I have to watch my weight."

Leo watched as you put your lunch down at the register– if he could even call it a lunch. A pack of saltine crackers, a cup of ice, a zero coke, and a bottle of water. He eyed you as he got the company card out of his wallet. "Shouldn't you grab like, I don't know, an actual lunch item?"

"This is enough," you protested. "I'm not even that hungry. Now stop before I start coming to the convenience store without you or any protection."

With a defeated sigh, Leo payed for your stuff and then grabbed the bag, walking out with you as you two headed back to the company. "How's this enough when all you had for breakfast was coffee? The whole point of me bringing you here was for you to get actual food Y/N.. we're all worried about you. "

"Don't be, I feel fine! I've been so energized since I stopped eating all the food I was eating before."

"That's your fatigue talking. You're gonna end up crashing, I'm telling you."

"I hear you and your worries, but I'm fine. Trust me." And with that, Leo let it go.

Big mistake.

The week after that was the Waterbomb Korea Festival. Because your group was performing, two months prior to the event Jungwon got tickets for all of ENHYPEN so they could come and support you guys. Jungwon was gonna return the tickets, not having the courage to face you, but all of the members insisted that it'd be quite fun to go and enjoy the festival as audience members and not artists for once. So they dragged Jungwon with them.

Jungwon had been so depressed. The past two weeks were a repeat of the same thing; he'd wake up, eat breakfast, go to the company, come back home, shower, eat dinner, talk to fans on We Verse, and then cry looking at videos and pictures he took of you till he'd fall asleep. His members didn't know what to do. They all discussed it and all 6 of them agreed that something about the breakup felt off; no way you fell out of love with Jungwon.

Jay had even come to see you at your company once. You were pretty close with Jay, him slowly becoming sort of a therapist for you once you two got close as he was quite well versed in helping you through your mental health. He was thinking that maybe you let the voices in your head get to you; maybe you felt you were not enough for Jungwon (which is so far from the truth) hence you broke up with him. But you kept giving Jay the same reason you gave Jungwon until he gave up and left after giving you some sweet words of encouragement. After that Jake, Heeseung, even Jungwon's sister had messaged you but you left all of their notifications untouched.

Jungwon had snagged pretty good seats; not too far from the stage and smack in the middle so they could get a good view of everything. They enjoyed all the acts and performances, having a genuinely good time. All the members were relieved to see Jungwon displaying a sincere smile on his face for the first time in 3 weeks.

Then your group came out and Jungwon felt his heart break all over again. Yes, partly because the breakup and your relationship were fresh wounds. But the main reason he was having a hard time holding it together was because of the way you looked.

Although everything about your outfit, hair, and makeup was perfect that day, Jungwon couldn't help but notice you lost an immense amount of weight. You usually didn't wear revealing clothing as it was out of your comfort zone, but for a festival like Waterbomb, your stylist had to put you in a halter crop top and really short shorts. So Jungwon could see a lot of your skin, and you looked so beautiful.. yet so weak.

And everyone noticed it too. "Is it just me," Niki started, "or does Y/N Noona look sick?"

Jungwon nodded and sighed disappointedly. "Yeah, she looks like she lost a lot of weight–"

"No not that Hyung," Niki interrupted. "I mean, yeah she does look like she lost too much weight but. I mean actually sick. Her face is pale and she's not performing like she usually does... like.. she's gonna faint..."

Jungwon's head snapped to you at the younger's words, now really watching you. And Niki was right, you looked sickly. You were a great performer, so it was definitely odd for you to not be fully doing the moves. Jungwon also noticed you kept looking down a lot, and then noticed you were scrunching your eyes tightly closed while doing so. Were you really going to faint??

Jungwon's question didn't go unanswered for much longer as your group's 3rd song was coming to an end. Jaein had just started singing the very ending of the song when you plopped onto the stage floor, making her scream in the middle of singing. The music stopped, the crowd went from singing and laughing to gasping and murmuring concernedly.

Jake's eyes widened. "What just happened?! Did Y/N just faint?!"

"I-I think so.." Heeseung responded.

The members (and everyone in the crowd) watched as staff rushed to you, gently picking you up and taking you back stage. Jungwon watched everything happen, completely frozen until he felt a tap on his shoulder. He turned around to see one of your manager's Leo standing there with a concerned look, completely out of breath.

"Hey man," Leo greeted. "We're gonna take Y/N to the hospital, the ambulance is on the way... D-do you wanna go with her?"

Jungwon frantically nodded. "Y-yeah Hyung, please." He said goodbye to his members and then followed Leo to where you are. They had you laid on the couch with your members surrounding you; some fanning you, some just watching you to see if you'd wake up, and Haydee was walking around looking stressed as she called your family.

Jungwon slowly made his way towards you. Your members nodded and made some room for him to kneel down in front of your unconscious figure. He caressed your cheek with the back of his fingers, trying to hold his tears back the best he could. "Wh-what did you do my baby.." he whimpered to himself.

"Jungwon," the eldest of your group called out to him.

He looked up to see her standing there with your backpack in her hand. "FeiFei Noona, what is it?"

"The ambulance is almost here, our managers arranged a space for us to change her into her regular clothes; these are pretty uncomfortable. Do you want to come with me to help change her?"

"Of course Noona, anything for her." He got up and carefully picked you up bridal style as he followed FeiFei to the empty dressing room. Jungwon couldn't help but notice that you had packed one of his shirts in your bag.

By the time you were dressed the ambulance came and you were put on a stretcher and taken in. Haydee, Leo, and your main manager went with you, along with Jungwon. The rest of your members were so distraught they knew they couldn't perform so they went home.

Once you were admitted to the hospital everyone was just sitting in the waiting room, waiting for any news on you.

"Any update?" Jake asked as he called Haydee.

"No," she sighed. "The doctor and nurses have been in there with her for almost an hour.. no one has said anything."

"How's Jungwon?"

Haydee looked over at Jungwon, turning her back to him and walking a bit further away so he couldn't hear. "Not good. He's been crying and sobbing. Nothing we say is helping, although Leo is trying hard. I'll call you once we hear anything."

Not too long after, a nurse came out to the waiting room. "Are you all here for Y/N-ssi?" Everyone stood up nodding. "We just transferred her into a room. The doctor is there waiting, you all can follow me."

They walked in to the room you were in and Jungwon gasped. Your face gained some color back but you were hooked up to IVs and the sight made Jungwon wince.

The doctor greeted the four in the room with you. "Ms. Y/N is fine now," he started. "She was heavily malnourished and dehydrated. I checked her charts, and it seems she lost a dangerous amount of weight in the past month. What have her eating habits been like recently?"

And for once Jungwon couldn't answer.. he had no idea what you'd been up to the past three weeks so Leo answered. "Honestly she hasn't really been eating much.. We all try to force her but she doesn't listen. I don't know how she is at home.."

Haydee shook her head. "It's the same thing at home. She drinks juice and then goes about her day. We've gotten into so many arguments with her about this but like our manager said, she doesn't really listen."

Jungwon teared up again hearing this information and looked up to the doctor with broken eyes. "W-when will she wake up?"

"Hopefully soon," the doctor said. "We're administering saline, medicines, and some nutritional vitamins to her through IV so she should wake up soon. I'll leave you all with her for some time."

"Haydee," your main manager called out. "We gotta get you back to the dorm.. I'm sorry but you guys still have to continue with your schedules and you have a fan meet tomorrow morning."

Haydee nodded defeated. "Okay.. let's go then."

Your main manager nodded then turned to Leo. "I've already talked to ENHYPEN's manager; Jungwon is allowed to stay as long as he'd like. You stay until she wakes up, and when Jungwon-ssi wants to go home take him. Call me if she wakes up."

Leo nodded as Haydee and his boss left the room. "Yes Hyung." Once they were gone he came up to Jungwon who was now sat by your bed, playing with the hand that wasn't hooked to machines. He put an encouraging hand on Jungwon's shoulder. "You okay?"

He sniffled and nodded. "I just.. I don't know what to feel.. I-I'm so mad at her but m-myself too..."

"Yeah I get it man.. I know your manager gave the okay for you to stay here as long as you want but my advice? Don't stay too long. Maybe it's selfish of me to say it but I don't want HYBE coming at Y/N again."

Jungwon slowly turned his head to look at Leo with disbelief written all over his face. "What do you mean Hyung.. what do you mean HYBE will come for her again."

Leo sighed, realizing he fucked up. "She'll kill me for telling you, but here." Leo took his phone out and showed Jungwon a picture of the letter HYBE sent you.

The more Jungwon read it the more he seethed with anger. He stood up abruptly. "What? How could HYBE do this?!"

Leo shrugged. "We were confused too, since HYBE were the ones who wanted to confirm your relationship in the first place. Don't be mad at Y/N; understand she did this to save your career."

"Why would I be mad at her?" he shook his head and turned to look at your unconscious figure. He caressed your cheek as a pout formed on his lips. "My baby.. I knew you still loved me.. but you put yourself through so much just for me.." He kissed your forehead before handing Leo his phone back. "I'll be back Hyung.. I've got a phone call to make. Send me that picture please."

Jungwon stepped out of the room to call his manager, accusing him of ruining his relationship but to his surprise, he was also shocked to hear the real reason why you broke up with him. Jungwon then sent the picture to his manager who immediately contacted his higher-ups at HYBE. "I'll call you back Jungwon-ah," he said before hanging up.

Jungwon paced around in front of the hospital room, biting his lips as a way to keep his anger at bay. HYBE did this without telling his manager, without telling him, and for what? And out of nowhere? None of it made sense. As soon as his manager called back Jungwon immediately picked up. "Hyung what did you find out."

"Jungwon.. that letter wasn't sent by HYBE."

He furrowed his eyebrows in confusion. "What? What do you mean? The address, the logo, it's even signed by HYBE!"

"Jungwon look closely at the picture.. the 'H' in the logo is tilted."

Jungwon took the phone off his ear to zoom in on the picture and sure enough, his manager was right. He put the phone back to his ear. "Hyung, I'm so confused. You're right but what does this mean?"

"Someone sent that letter to Y/N pretending to be HYBE to sabotage your relationship"

Jungwon's eyes widened. "What? Who would do such a thing?"

"My guess is a crazy fan? Sasaeng? I'm not sure but HYBE is working on it as we speak. We'll get to the bottom of this. You stay with Y/N and her manager and do not leave the hospital alone. We don't know if anyone is trying to hurt you or Y/N."

Immediately Jungwon went back to your hospital room, relaying this new information to Leo who was equally shocked. The two couldn't do anything about it so they just sat around your hospital room waiting for you to wake up. Jungwon in the mean time was updating his members and his sister about what he had just found out.

Another three hours later, you had slowly opened your eyes. You were quite confused as you looked around to see you were in a hospital room, with machines hooked to you. In the car corner of the room you saw Leo and Jungwon sitting on the couch scrolling through their phones. You didn't know what was going on, so you mustered all the strength you had to call out Jungwon's name hoarsely.

Immediately he looked up and practically chucked his phone on the couch before sprinting over to you. "Y-Y/N! You're awake!" His face lit up with joy and relief as he sat down next to you, taking your free hand and kissing it. "Thank God!"

Leo walked over to you and smiled."How you doing kiddo?"

"I'm fine.. what happened? Weren't we performing today?"

Leo nodded. "You were yeah. Until you fainted on stage."

Your eyes widened. "W-what?! I fainted?"

"The doctor said you were heavily malnourished and dehydrated. I told you right? That you'd end up crashing? You didn't listen now look where we are." Leo shook his head in disappointment before ruffling your hair. "Glad you're awake though. I'm gonna go find the doctor so you guys can have some alone time.. you two really need to talk."

After Leo left you hesitantly looked at Jungwon. "Jungwon.."

He gave you a sad smile as he caressed your hand. "I'm glad you're awake."

You sighed. "I'm sorry Jungwon."

"For which part? The part where you didn't take care of yourself? Or the part where you lied to me and broke up with me because of HYBE?"

You widened your eyes. "H-how did you–"

"What were you thinking princess? Why would you tell me you don't love me? Did you want me to start hating you?"

You slowly nodded. "I-I did what I had to do Jungwon... your life was in risk, your members lives were at risk; your careers were at risk! You worked so hard to get here, I couldn't be selfish and take that from you."

"But you were selfish! You took yourself away from me!" he exclaimed. Jungwon wiped his tears before continuing. "Why didn't you tell me?"

"I-I was told not to.."

Jungwon sighed, coming closer to you and he caressed your cheek. "Baby.. Leo Hyung showed me the letter so I contacted my manager who knew nothing of it. Then he talked to HYBE and.. they said they didn't send it."

Your heart stopped. "What? What do you mean?"

"So I spoke to my manager a little earlier.. one of my sasaengs sent that letter to you impersonating HYBE."

"Are you serious?!" you almost yelled. "I ended our relationship because of a sasaeng?!"

Jungwon sadly nodded. "Yeah baby.. But HYBE found her and she's having charges pressed against her for this whole mess. We don't know how she found your address so she's got that against her too."

You sighed taking in all of that information and then you suddenly started crying. You pulled Jungwon to you and wrapped your free arm around him. "I-I'm so sorry Jungwon!"

Your sobs brought tears to his eyes again and he too started crying as he gently hugged you back. "Shh.. it's okay.. you didn't do it on purpose.. you did it to save me and as much as I hate it, I'll always appreciate that baby.." He kissed your forehead before letting go and sitting next to your bed again. "Now let's talk about your health.. why did you do this Y/N-yah.."

You shrugged, not really knowing what to tell him. "I don't really know.. I just, didn't feel lie eating I guess."

He shook his head at your reasoning. "Doesn't matter. Eating is a basic human need.. even if you don't feel like eating you should eat something. And Leo Hyung told me about your "lunches"; you think saltines and juice are enough to fill you up for the day, hmm?" he lightly scolded.

"S-sorry Jungwon-ah.."

He sighed as he felt the tears coming back and he looked at you completely dejected. "Please baby.. promise me you'll never do this again.. Please, just eat.."

You felt so bad for everything you put Jungwon through in the past couple weeks, your heart was breaking more than ever. "Jungwonnie," you cooed. "Come here."

Immediately he caught your drift and stood up to lean over your body and kiss you. You two passionately kissed for a couple seconds before he pulled away and rested his forehead against yours. "Be my girlfriend again Y/N," he sniffed. "Please... be mine forever."

You nodded and pecked his lips shortly. "I love you Jungwon."

Jungwon sighed, missing your voice telling him that. "I know, I know my baby.. and I love you too."

#yall know how hard it is to find sad jungwon gifs #happy virus frfr #enhypen imagines #enhypen reactions #enhypen #enhypen jungwon #yang jungwon #jungwon #jungwon reactions #jungwon imagines

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apple-grass-and-smiles · 11 months

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Hello! The ever-sweet and wonderful @marthaskane tagged me to share eight shows that define me/help you get to know me. Without further ado, the shows!

Alias (2001-2006)

Alias has taught me the value of old LiveJournal pages and the Wayback Machine more than any other show I've ever loved. I discovered this show in 2013 when it was on Netflix and then I spent a few months in Germany, where I spent too much money buying almost the entire show on iTunes because I could not comprehend going more than a day without Sydney Bristow with me.

2. The Clone Wars (2008-2013, 2014, 2020)

I remember when this show first aired and my siblings and I had a square dance at our school (very American, I know) so we had to DVR it. The next morning we snuck down early to watch it with the volume super low so we wouldn't wake up our parents. Few shows have continuously come back into my life the way this one has. I can track a lot of how I've changed as a fan through the different ways I've viewed this show over the last 15 years.

3. Fringe (2008-2013)

I've been rewatching this show since January of this year and can confirm: it is still a nearly perfect 100 episodes of TV. Fringe manages to perfect a lot of the plot lines and dynamics that appear in Alias (both are J.J. Abrams/his collaborators projects). It manages to walk the line between a procedural and a mythology-driven show beautifully and so clearly knows what message and themes it wants to share from the very first shot. If you like exploring messy family dynamics, action, and the X-Files, Fringe is a good option for you.

4. Gotham (2014-2019)

I historically have no cared much at all about Batman. He struck me as pretty boring in comparison to every other person he interacted with. Gotham change that for me (turns out he just needed to be put next to any even more boring guy, but I digress...). Loving this show is a lesson in looking past weird choices, wacky inconsistencies, and learning to just trust that writers will give you a fun ride, even if you understand less that 15% of it. It helped me remember that the sentence "I love this show" does not always mean "here is a perfect example of perfect storytelling" and just how freeing that can be. It also gave me a beautiful little group of friends who continue to make me smile on a regular basis.

5. Blindspot (2015-2020)

While this show may not be one I post about often, it was foundational for how I interact in fandom now. It was one of the first times I was active in a fandom from the start of the show. It was the first time I was in a fandom group chat and my Tumblr friends broke containment into being people I followed on Instagram and texted. I organized a Secret Santa. It was the first time I remember actively freaking out of promo photos (1x09 IYKYK) and synopses. Almost all the confidence I have when interacting in fandoms is from these experiences. And the plot is stellar.

6. Iron Fist (2017-2018)

I can't tell you how I ended up watching this. I do not know what prompted me to turn it on but I'm really glad I did. This show has so many amazing nuggets of amazingness and its shortcomings brought me together with two of my favorite people as we tried to understand what had gone wrong and where. (This is not a good ad for the show.) I love getting to play with stories and characters that have seemingly infinite potential and getting to do it with other people who are just as committed to the story as I was meant the world.

7. The Rookie (2018-present)

I fought against this one so hard. I did not want to get into it, but as my dash filled with those gifs of Lucy in the green dress and I had my wonderful friend pitching the show to me over and over, I caved. And I'm really glad I did. The experience of watching a long season over months, one week and one episode at a time, is so different than streaming or rewatching shows and I'd forgotten how much I missed it until I got to do it again for this show. My Tuesday livestreams with my lovely friend single-handedly pulled me through so many rough spots over the last year. For a procedural dramedy, The Rookie continues to serve up some of the best characters on TV right now and consistently delivers some of the best cold opens.

8. Prodigal Son (2019-I'm in denial)

The show that owns my heart and soul. The show I'd sell my organs to get new episodes of. Returning to this show, whether I'm writing fic, doing a TED Talk in my head about the psychology in the show, or actually watching an episode, consistently feels like coming home. I did not know it was possible for someone to stick their hand in your head and pull out a show custom-made for you, but that's what this is. The characters are all so perfectly imperfect and desperate to be better. The plots are just the perfect amount of bonkers. The show being a drama pretending to be a procedural is beautiful. If you'd told me in 2019 that a show about a profiler whose dad is a serial killer and they solve crimes together would be the show that would leave an indelible mark on my life, I would have rolled my eyes because that's so cliche. 2019!me had no idea what she was on about. But I'm glad she figured it out and randomly put on this little show one night that had continued to pull me through good days and bad days and everything in between.

As for tagging other people, anyone is welcome to join but I’ll specifically tag some people I know who haven't been tagged (I think): @electricbluebutterflies, @chenlucys, @shinythinx, @rojaswarren, @meandmyechoes, @padme-deserved-better, @whitesunlars, @harrows-bones, @bpdanakins, and @violetsandmagpies.

#emily does stuff (shocker)#I feel like it's been a while since I've done a tag #which is an entirely self-inflicted state #due to not doing much stuff that isn't work or sleeping #as I tagged people I had the beautiful experience of continuing to see people that I wanted to tag #because they're great! and I love hearing from them! and I am so glad I know them the way I do!#but I didn't want to have 47 people tagged because that's just too long #and yes if you think this is about you it 110% is and I love you!#I'll chill out now #sorry but also a little not sorry for writing novels here #I don't know what anyone else could have expected though

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ruanbaijie · 1 year

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hello again hanyiii💖 your work sounds tiring😭 but hopefully next month is more relaxed so you can take it easier!

omgg what's your cat's name? i've always had a dog at home but i'd love a cat too!! they're always so funny and lol i can imagine it being shy about strangers 🤣

excited to see all your edits!! simple or not i bet they'll all be beautiful😍 your lastest levi gifset looks stunning! he looks so good in that uniform!

are you watching any seasonals anime now? and what are your plans in the holidays? only a few more weeks until Christmas and i'm soo excited ❤️❤️

-animanga secret santa

hello santa!

sigh there are good days and bad days but recently it's just been a stretch of bad days _:(´ཀ`」 ∠):_ the first two days of this week especially, but today wasn't that bad so I'm hoping for the best for the last two days of the week {{ (>_<) }}

his name is mika! we were trying to decide on a name, my mum suggested a few names starting with "m" (since he has an "m" on his forehead - very typical cat pattern). mika was one of them and my brother picked it for the singer while i picked it because of owari no seraph ▓▒░(°◡°)░▒▓ our family never considered getting a cat but now a couple of years later we're all cat slaves (/ =ω=)/ what is your dog's name and what is it like?

thank you so much! (´｡• ᵕ •｡`) ♡ I was trying to keep my gifsets for that challenge (the fashion week one) as simple as I could since it's 7 days of posting in a row so thankfully he only wore that uniform for a couple of episodes which made finding scenes so much easier ┐(￣ヮ￣)┌ I've also just started on my set for my secret santa giftee! I did like 2 gifs and my arm started hurting and went well ok this is gonna take a while and gave up for the night ᕕ( ᐛ )ᕗ

I'm watching chainsaw man, sxf's second cour, and blue lock! I'd only started blue lock over the weekend but I already need more ( ~*-*)~ I don't know if you're watching it too (or have read it) but my god chigiri's scene in episode 7 had me SCREAMING - I was equally excited during that tsukki scene in haikyuu (if you don't or haven't watched blue lock and/ or haikyuu I'm so sorry aklalkdflkkl just skip right past this but my FEELS oh my god it's been four days and a few months respectively since those scenes but they still evoke such excitement lkkldlklalkd) *incoherent screaming*

I'll be going to cambodia with my family for a few days, then off to korea by myself! we were supposed to go to turkey for our family trip for a couple of weeks but my brother had other commitments at the last minute so we had to plan for something shorter and nearer. I'm counting down to it! what about you, do you have any plans you're looking forward to?

#*replies #animangasecretsanta

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1kook · 3 years

Text

viki & hickeys

the 8th installment to netflix & chill :~)

SUMMARY Just like in those Viki dramas Jungkook likes, the world around you is enveloped in shades of pink and red, kisses and hearts, so many goddamn roses it makes you sneeze. It’s absolutely perfect— nothing could possibly go wrong when there’s so much love in the air. WARNINGS a little hurt + a lot of comfort, mentions of cheating!villain!jin, insecure!kook, emotional breakdowns, mentions of jk’s lonely past, jk cries :( smut in the forms of making out, eating out, fingering, clit play, hickeys, jk likes cum, double orgasm, squirting, tiny praise kink, blindfolding, rough + unprotected sex, doggy style, choking!!!, breeding/impreg kink, JEALOUS KOOK, mini hand kink, a lil bit of spanking, degradation, he gets progressively meaner lol oc cries MISC there’s a lot of fuckin plot omfg -_-, it’s Valentine’s Eve!, doyeon makes Some Points, mentions of park seojoon juicy ass, they go on a d8 😳, oc like rlly wants to marry him, oc commits double phone homicide RATING m (18+) WC 16.3k !!!! ik its fckin LOOOONG

NOTES (!) in true Viki fashion, here’s an nc fic where there’s like 3 different plot lines n a hot male antagonist <3 this series started off as just me wanting to write smut n it still is! now i just like to infuse different levels of angst into it as well </3 as always, lemme know what u think!! i proofread it twice but one of those times had been at 4 am so if u see a typo no u didn't. also here’s a gif of jungkook crying during a dolly parton performances and here’s another gif of jungkook crying bc it’s scary how pretty he looks

Being evil and hot does not come for free. As you’ve long since learned in the past twenty-three years of your life, you truly can’t have it all.

There is always some deliberating character flaw the universe must bestow upon you in order to level you out, make you fall onto the same plane as all the other mortals. Everyone has one, no matter how small or insignificant. Doyeon’s is that she doesn’t know how to work a straightening iron. Namjoon's is that he can’t tell the difference between water and liquor. Jungkook, despite all his tech-y nerdiness, doesn’t know how to do his own taxes. And yours? You don’t know shit about romcoms.

Your knowledge on the romantic genre is what leads to this predicament now, the ring on your finger heavy as Doyeon regards you with what is perhaps the most unimpressed look known to mankind. “This is a promise ring,” she says bluntly, the bustling sounds of the coffee shop around you the soundtrack to your sudden realization.

“No,” you deny, even though you know she’s right. “It’s an engagement ring.”

Doyeon rolls her eyes. “Babe,” she starts slowly, talks to you like you’re a dorky high schooler with her first boyfriend, “did he ask you to marry him?”

The truth is, the timing had been weird. It had been a few days after you’d rocked Jungkook’s world so you understand if he felt the sudden need to pop the question. But you were also sick as fuck that day, had only vaguely remembered the events because you were too busy with the snot up your nose and the raging fever you were battling. Had Jungkook asked you to marry him?

You’re not so sure.

It’s been a little over a month since then, and sure his lack of proactive wedding planning was a little weird, but you had always assumed Jungkook was one of those people who liked long engagements. Liked to drag out the last few months as a bachelor. Maybe he was waiting until you were both financially stable or something, who knows.

Doyeon had been on some soul-searching journey around the country, so she hadn't been home for a while, had only heard of the ring through a two-second snapchat. This is the first time she’s seeing you and it in person; you can tell by the expression on her face that she’s rightfully disappointed.

“Have you no shame, woman?” she tuts, arms crossed over her chest. “You have me parading around the world bragging about your engagement— just for this?”

You knock your forehead against the table, know it’s dirty and icky, but you deserve it. “Listen,” you huff. “I’ve only seen The Notebook, like, once.”

She scoffs. “I can tell. This is so embarrassing, don’t tell me you’ve brought it up to him?”

At her words you startle, nearly send the drinks flying across the floor. “No!” you shout, mindlessly reaching to twist the ring around your finger. It’s become a habit these past few weeks, a comfort to feel it around you. Granted, the feeling is a little muted now. “Of course he’d get me a promise ring,” you grumble, gaze flickering down to the silver band on your ring finger. “Jungkook loves all that cheesy corny stuff.” He really did.

You’ve had enough of Doyeon’s disappointment, decide this coffee date has brought you enough three am anxiety material for the next year and a half. You conclude your date by taking a walk around town, arms locked together as you laugh at people who pass by because you’re both a little mean.

“Maybe it’s for the best,” she says, and you agree. Well, a promise ring certainly meant something. It was, essentially, a pre-engagement ring. And the engagement ring that followed was a pre-wedding ring. And a wedding ring was, well, a wedding ring. Your heartbeat thunders at the thought. “You’re busy right now anyway,” she points out, snapping you out of your bumbling thoughts. “Aren’t you getting promoted at work soon?”

Oh, you certainly were getting promoted at work. After many grueling months of hard work and dedication, the fruits of your labor were finally being recognized. Gone were the days of useless desk work, intern-like errands that barely required the use of any higher-order brain functions. You had worked hard these past few months, proved your worth over and over again, until you were here. Getting promoted into a new branch at your company— one where your talents were actually needed. And truth be told, there was one man to thank for that.

Your friend and superior, Kim Seokjin.

Seokjin is a great boss. In fact, you could argue he’s the best in the entire world and that, if it wasn’t for him, you would have quit this job that first month you started. But you had him to push you along, friendly smiles and encouragements that kept you going until this point, where you’re being promoted up into a branch where your degree finally matters. And it was all thanks to him! What Kim Namjoon was to Jungkook, Kim Seokjin was to you.

So what if he cheated on his wife and flirted with the secretaries— Seokjin was practically a god in your eyes.

And what Seokjin did in his free time was frankly none of your business anyway. You were colleagues at work, got along fairly well, but outside of work you were practically strangers. He was your beloved work colleague, someone Jungkook teased you about endlessly despite never having met him, and you were immensely thankful for him. “Should I be scared he’ll steal you from me?” Jungkook had joked one night, standing behind you as you scrolled through your company profile page. “He is a little handsome.”

You had pinched his side, smiling at his feigned concern when he pressed his lips to your temple. “You’re right,” you had joked back, “he is sooo cool.” And Jungkook had bitten you on the shoulder, laughed that pretty laugh when you yelped in surprise.

Anyway, Kim Seokjin was a god, Jungkook was on his way to maybe, hopefully, one day, being your husband, and all was well.

To honor this moment in time, you decide to swing by Jungkook’s place after your date with Doyeon, finding him lazily sprawled across his living room couch while What’s Wrong with Secretary Kim? plays on the Jumbotron. He’s in between projects right now, so he’s spent most of his time relaxing and catching up on all his favorite shows.

Which brings you back to that deliberating character flaw of yours: no knowledge of the romantic genre to utilize in your everyday life. Your love language has always been blunt words, teasing jabs, the raw and unfiltered type of love. Emotions? Impossible to figure out. You’ve gotten pretty far in life reading verbal and physical cues; with Jungkook, you always know he’s upset when he does the little tongue-against-cheek thing, and it has saved you from many potential arguments.

On the other hand, it is so obvious what Jungkook’s love language is when he spends fifty percent of his time on Viki, home to some of the most cheesy kdramas in existence. Most guys spend their weekends watching sports or dramatic action movies, but here was Jungkook. Watching some guy try to court his secretary.

(Okay, he does watch sports and action movies too, but that’s not the point!)

“Hello, sweet boy,” you greet, plopping down beside him. Jungkook smiles back softly. He’s serving absolute pre-pre-husband deliciousness right now, cute glasses, fluffy curls, plaid bottoms that make him look so comfy. God, you were going to suck his dick tonight.

Jungkook slots his mouth against yours, tastes like the chocolate cake you specifically told him not to eat without you. He blindsides you before you can scold him, pulls you onto his lap where the swell of his cock nudges against your thigh. Oh, you were definitely going to suck his dick and ride him well into the sunrise.

“What’s my pretty girl doing here tonight?” he asks, cutely looping his fingers through yours. “Thought you were with the Wicked Witch of the West today?”

You roll your eyes, reposition yourself in a laughable attempt at pretending like you’re actually interested in the show. “We just went out for lunch,” you explain, watching the hot lead saunter across the screen. Juicy ass, but nothing compared to Jungkook’s.

There’s a question lingering on the tip of your tongue, Doyeon’s explanations mixed with your worries, and you hold it for exactly ten seconds before you’re turning to face him head on, eyes going a little crossed from how close he is. “Hey,” you say bluntly. “Is this a promise ring?” you ask, wiggle your finger in his face.

Jungkook blinks, once, twice, and then his face shoots up in flames. “Maybe,” he mumbles, lips pursed as he tries to avoid your gaze. He was adorable. You laugh, endeared by the red flush that crawls over his cute little cheeks and up his ears. Unable to stop yourself, you squeeze said cheeks between your hands, cooing at the annoyed expression that consumes him soon afterwards.

“Aw, you want to marry me,” you tease, but it’s secretly a leading question for him to confess that yes, he does want to marry you. For as hot and confident as you are, you too are plagued with doubts. Doubts that can only be smoothed over by hearing it straight from Jungkook’s mouth.

He rolls his eyes, trying to break free from your hold. “We’ve talked about this,” he murmurs, all embarrassed. But like always, Jungkook knows exactly what you want so he doesn’t deny it, and that’s good enough for you. He’s too flustered to look you in the eye now, childishly craning his head away from you when you try to force him into a staring contest. “Can I finish my show?” he whines, slightly not as hard now that you’ve reduced him into a shy, bumbling mess. It was a nice change of pace from his usual, composed self.

But you relent, sliding off his lap to sit against his side, classic octopus hug around his waist. The episode is in full swing, not that you know anything about it. Like you said, romantic shows and movies were the least of your concerns. Jungkook, however, eats this type of shit up. “He still trying to fuck her?” you ask, not the least bit interested, but if you’re planning on sucking his dick tonight you have to listen to a few minutes of him rambling first.

Jungkook sighs. “Yeah,” he says, “I don’t get it.” You hum, trail your hand over his abdomen teasingly. He feels so warm and lean beneath your palm, you were getting hot just thinking about it. “Why would anyone agree to dating their boss?”

You know that Jungkook’s boss is some old Facebook fart, pioneer of something on the site that neither of you two care about. So it makes sense that such a notion disturbs him. You shrug anyway. “Everyone wants to sleep with their hot boss,” you offer. “It’s like, the power dynamic, I guess.”

His frown deepens. “Would you?” Your boss isn’t exactly an old fart; the reason Kim Seokjin was such a renowned playboy is because, well, he had the looks to pull it off. Still, he had become a sort of respectable figure to you and the idea of sleeping with him doesn’t really sound appealing as much as it would to any other random bachelorette, which you admittedly were not. You glance at the screen, where Park Seojoon swaggers around in those tight slacks and fitted button-ups.

“Hm,” you ponder, “maybe.”

Jungkook laughs. “You’re supposed to say no, you idiot,” he says, knocks his forehead against yours softly. You can’t help but chuckle too, enamored with the happy glint in his eyes and the way his smile eats up his features.

Oh, you loved this man.

Because he was so sweet and good on Christmas, you let Jungkook make the plans for Valentine’s Day. After all, it’s his favorite holiday (“Why? Well, because it’s a day all about you, and me, and us,” he had sighed dreamily in the bathtub one night, hair adorably pushed back to showcase that handsome face of his. Bubbles clung to his chest, had made you dizzy with every breath he took.), so it’s only right that he gets to make the itinerary for the day, fill it with all his favorite things. After all, cheesy romantic stuff like this was right up his lane.

He reserves a spot at the fanciest restaurant in the city, the one that has a months long waiting list. It sounds perfect, and the closer it gets to February 13th, the more excited you become. You say 13th because the 14th is a Sunday, and as much as you would love to get on your knees and praise Jungkook’s body until the wee hours of the next day, you have work. So Sunday is off the table. And it’s better this way, you tell yourself. Everywhere would have been packed that day anyway.

It seems like everywhere you go, the entire world is gearing up for the holiday; from the fast food drive-thru to your favorite lingerie shop, there’s Valentine’s Day specials everywhere you look. Just like in those Viki dramas Jungkook likes, the world around you is enveloped in shades of pink and red, kisses and hearts, so many goddamn roses it makes you sneeze. It’s absolutely perfect— nothing could possibly go wrong when there’s so much love in the air.

But what good is a lovey-dovey holiday without your own lovey dove himself?

One glance out your window and your knees feel weak, because there he is. Dressed in a loose satin button up, shoulders broad, chest defined. He’s got on these fitted dress pants that accentuate his tiny waist too, thick thighs bulging beneath the fabric. There’s a coat hugging his frame, something to shield him from the cold while he waits out on the curb, does this cute little shivering dance in an attempt to warm up his muscles. Your heart feels like it’ll explode at the sight, and you can practically hear the corny, overused romantic song playing in the background of your thoughts, so you hurriedly distract yourself by slipping tonight’s dress on.

It’s cold outside, but the sight of Jungkook makes you feel warm and fuzzy everywhere. He’s so hot it makes you dizzy, and the sap knows it when he meets you on the sidewalk. Instinctively, his hand reaches out to tangle with yours, the other slipping around your waist. “Hi, gorgeous,” he greets playfully, kissing your knuckles. His hair has grown out a little, curls up cutely when he lets it air dry and tickles your skin when he gets too close. “Lookin’ like Secretary Kim.”

“Oh? So does that make you my hot boss?” you tease as you make your way to the car.

As always, he opens the door for you first, flashes you this dorky little wink as he rounds the front of the car. “If it means you’ll sleep with me tonight, then sure,” he says, buckling himself in. You roll your eyes at his claim. You don’t get to see the proud little smile on his face; by the time you’ve composed yourself, he’s already pulling off in the direction of the restaurant.

It’s a classy thing, a restaurant and bar in some insanely tall skyscraper. Of course your seats are right beside one of the huge floor to ceiling windows, overlooking the beautiful, glittering cityscape. “Fancy,” you murmur as you sit down, catching a glimpse of the eye roll Jungkook gives you.

“You say that about any place that serves wine,” he chuckles, reaching for the bottle on the table to pour you a glass.

The wine tastes like perfection, aged for the perfect amount of time. Whatever that was. You don’t really know, but it tastes amazing! Still, amazement aside, you manage a scoff. “I didn’t say that about your house on our first date,” you huff anyway, throwing him a playful glare over the rim of your glass.

Jungkook laughs, full and real this time. It’s a little too loud for the classy establishment you find yourselves in, drowns out the jazz music for a second. “That’s because it was a house,” he says, wearing that big, shiny smile you adore, “and we were watching Transformers.” An amazing date, the mere memory of it makes your toes curl. He had been so dreamy— nearly two years ago now! —and had retained that aura up to the present day. You don’t think you’ve ever been so in love with anyone or anything in this world before, as cheesy as it was to admit.

As if sensing your sudden wandering thoughts, Jungkook nudges your ankle under the table. “Hey,” he says so softly you could melt; his voice was so silky and sweet. “Everything okay?” he asks.

A sigh, chin in your palm. You had to have been abducted by aliens or something— there was no way this was your life, this disgustingly romantic date with this disgustingly handsome man. An episode of Black Mirror maybe? One where you get forced to live in a romantic Viki drama with the man you love, every single day for the rest of your life? Maybe.

Dramatics aside, you could practically feel that sticky sweet, sentimental monster begging to crawl to the surface, unleash the entire Shakespearean collection of lovesick sonnets on your unsuspecting boyfriend in the middle of this restaurant. But the weird ones, were you accidentally dedicate an entire six lines to the bulge of Jungkook’s thighs in his workout pants or the heart-shaped mole on his shoulder. Those kind. Before that can happen, you settle on an equally as gentle, “I love you,” murmured for only him to hear.

Across the table, Jungkook smiles. One of those thin ones when he’s trying to keep his composure but is actually quite flustered, his subtle bunny teeth nibbling at his lower lip. “Thanks,” he responds, still trying to play it cool, but then he almost knocks his glass down and you’re reminded just how perfect he was, flaws and all. “Me too.”

You jab the pointed tip of your stiletto against his shin. “Say it back,” you warn and he laughs.

“I love you,” Jungkook says like it’s the easiest thing in the world. Straight out of a romantic drama, like the ones on Viki that require a minimum of four different story arcs just to get to this point. But with Jungkook, it takes a few shy smiles and maybe a kiss. It has a scorching heat rising on your cheeks, one you ward away with a hurried sip of your drink while Jungkook reaches for your hand, thumb rubbing over your promise ring as if for good luck.

That singular phrase makes your world pause, its axis stalling while you deal with the overwhelmingly soft and gooey feelings in your chest. Oh jeez, you had to rock his world tonight. It was only right. He deserved it for making you feel like this— this silly and ditzy, like a middle schooler with her crush.

Anyway the food gets to your table after a millennia. Jungkook orders some fancy lobster dish, one that you're pretty sure costs more than the purse you brought along tonight (to be fair, you’re a cheap buyer), and still has the audacity to poke around at your plate too. He eats enough to feed a schoolhouse full of children who’ve just come off recess, practically devouring the table cloth before you stop him. And then he doesn’t let you see the bill; “baby, don’t worry about that when you’re with me,” he purrs, warm breath fanning against the skin on your neck, drunk off pure love and strawberry lemonade because he was driving tonight. The hostess is a blushing mess, fumbling for his change as Jungkook practically gropes your ass in plain sight.

You swear he’s spending too much time on that Viki streaming service, because then, as if the romantic dinner date wasn’t enough, he whisks you off to an even more romantic walk along the river.

If there was ever a world record for “Number of Times you can Make your Girlfriend Swoon,” you’re positive Jungkook had broken it in the span of a few hours. You feel so light-headed and in love by the time you reach the river.

“You know,” you tell him as you walk, the serene sounds of the flowing water beside you the soundtrack to your date. Jungkook swings your joined hands between the two of you. It’s chilly but you’re so full and happy that you don’t let it bother you. “I was gonna throw wine at you when we first met.”

He cackles, that loud, airy sound again that he only lets you hear, with his head thrown back. “What?” he gasps, smiley and pretty, your pretty boy. “And why were you going to do that?”

You huff, feeling slightly embarrassed now to admit such a thing. But aside from Doyeon, no one else has ever heard this classified tale. And well, you’re feeling extra emotional tonight. An abundance of emotions in one night usually ended with you crying like a little bitch at some point or another, so you’re trying to push that off for later. “Because,” you sigh, squeezing his fingers, your lone promise ring versus his assortment of fashionable rings. “You sounded like an absolute fuck boy when you first texted me!”

Jungkook scoffs, playfully scandalized. “Me?” he squawks, pausing to stand in front of you with wide eyes and a ridiculously huge smile, the kind that has his brows raised high, lips going thin, practically displaying every tooth in his mouth from how wide it is.

“Jungkook,” you say calmly, shoving one finger against his chest. “You asked me to Netflix & chill for our first date.”

He groans, using your entwined hands to pull you into his arms for a suffocating hug. “I already told you,” he laughs, patting the back of your head while you get in a few lighthearted punches against his sides. “I didn’t know what it meant.”

“Whatever, you sleaze,” you say anyway, eventually melting into his hands. “Bet you tell all the girls that.” Jungkook makes another scandalized noise, but settles when you wrap your hands around him. He smells so good and familiar, comforting even. Like home and safety, a refuge for your heart. When you’re this close, you can hear the light beating of it beneath your ear, a steady rhythm that has you closing your eyes when he begins humming your favorite song.

He gets about two verses in when your phone suddenly goes off.

Everything in your body says to ignore it, to continue basking in the comfort of your boyfriend’s embrace and this absolutely perfect moment. But it’s the stupid ringtone you set for all your work peers when you first loaded the entire company contact list onto your phone, so the sound alone lets you know it’s a work-related call. And for work to be calling you on a weekend was definitely not a good sign.

“Give me a sec,” you tell Jungkook, pulling away from his arms. He frowns but lets you go, staying close as you dig through your purse for the offending device.

It’s Kim Seokjin calling at this peculiar hour, a fact that confuses the hell out of you. Jungkook’s bouncing on his heels in an attempt to fight off the chill, giving you his beautiful side profile as he glances down the winding sidewalk that follows the river, and then at his watch. His nose is a cute red color that you want to kiss so bad. But work calls, so you tighten up and let that dream go for now. You swipe your thumb across the screen.

“Hello, Mr. Kim,” you greet, trying to keep the confusion out of your voice. “How can I help—“

“__, my love,” he beams through the phone, so fucking loud it has Jungkook glancing over curiously. You give him a tight-lipped smile, one he returns as he shuffles closer, trying to steal your warmth like a penguin. You let him snuggle close before turning back to the droning voice of your superior on the line.

“Hello,” you repeat again, slowly. Jungkook takes your free hand in his; when he squeezes, the band of your promise ring digs into your skin just the slightest. “Was something the matter?”

Seokjin laughs, loud and clear. There’s a lot of other noises filtering in through his line. Briefly, you remember that there had been some work-related party for the higher ups tonight so you write it off as that. “Does there need to be a problem for me to call you, love?”

You falter. Beside you, Jungkook’s brows furrow together, his devilishly handsome features even more pronounced. He’s obviously heard the other man on the line. “Um,” you flounder for a second, “well, usually yes.”

Without missing a beat, Seokjin carries on with a playful tut that you’re almost certain has him lifting the receiver up to his mouth, because it’s so goddamn loud it has you flinching away from your own device. “My __,” he says, sweet and… slurred?

He’s never used this tone of voice on you, only on other women at the office. Something about his broken marriage and needing to heal a wound, you don’t fucking know. You can’t even begin to truly understand that logic, which is why you’ve always just ignored it. Still, in the last few months of knowing Seokjin, he has never made a pass at you. Until now, that is. And until now, you had kind of convinced yourself he saw you in a sisterly way. Which sure, was worse than being friendzoned. But this was your boss you were talking about. Whether you got sister-zoned or not by him was the least of your concerns. So what was going on? What had changed over the span of a few days that had him suddenly reaching out to you on a weekend?

Beside you, Jungkook doesn’t look the slightest bit impressed, tongue prodding against his cheek as Seokjin rambles on the line. You wish you had lowered the volume before answering, but doing so now would appear suspicious, even you could admit that. “You’re amazing, you know that?” Seokjin praises. You nod, remember he can’t see you, and settle on a blunt thanks instead. Jin laughs. “You’re different from the rest,” he hums, voice soft and weirdly intimate.

Jungkook’s frown deepens. “What does he want?” he murmurs, somehow managing to keep his voice calm as always. The deep furrow of his brows and the tongue-against-cheek motion he had done just a few seconds ago all indicate he’s annoyed, that much you can tell.

You shrug, eyes wide as you hurry to get to the reason for the phone call. You’re almost certain it’s just Seokjin being drunk— many people drunkenly dial their friends and family to tell them how much they’re appreciated, this wasn’t anything weird!

Is what you try to convince yourself, but then Seokjin’s voice is dropping an octave by your ear. “Did you get my gift?” he murmurs, voice nearly drowned out by the sounds of the event he’s at.

“Huh?” you stammer, quite stupidly if you do say so yourself. Jungkook shifts closer, obviously trying to hear. A breeze ruffles his hair, his cologne wafting over you. “What?”

A sigh over the line. “My gift, love,” Kim Seokjin says, loud and proud. Jungkook exhales, hard. “I had it sent to your house this evening. Something pretty for a pretty girl— don’t tell me the postman fucked that up,” he jokes and Jungkook huffs, practically breathing fire through his nose when he hears the words.

You fidget. There had been no gift when Jungkook picked you up around sunset, not like you had expected anything to begin with. And aside from Jungkook and maybe your parents, there was no one else on this planet you wanted to receive a Valentine’s Day gift from anyway, especially not from your boss of all people. “Um,” you mumble, acutely aware of the way Jungkook’s face is nearly pressed to yours now in his effort to listen in on your phone call. “I— um, haven’t been home, Seokjin.”

Jungkook scoffs, spits out a particularly unimpressed, “Seokjin?”

Said man doesn’t hear. “Oh, of course,” he says, almost sullenly. “I forgot you had that little boyfriend to entertain tonight.”

It’s the breaking point for Jungkook, who leans back to glare at the phone with the heat of a thousand suns. You press it against your chest before he can hear anything else. “I’m sorry,” you rush out in a hurried whisper, eyes flickering over his face, trying to gauge the intensity of his emotions. “I think he’s drunk— he’s never said things to me like this before,” you stammer, feeling like you have to defend yourself for some reason. “I’ll- I’ll take care of it, okay?” No answer, just an aggravated shake of his head, like he’s trying to calm himself down. “Jungkook?” you say, can feel the panic begin to lace your voice when his eyes flutter shut.

He calms your worries with a gentle head butt that has you gasping in surprise, one hard exhale fanning over you. “Okay,” he says, teeth clenched. “I’m gonna go sit.” And then he stiffly walks over to one of the many benches lining the pathway. He sits, just like he had said he would, and glares down at his hands instead.

The sight makes you anxious, unsure of how to diffuse the situation because, like you’ve said many times before, dealing with emotions— especially someone else’s emotions —was hard. Your eyes refuse to leave his figure as you draw the phone back up to your ear again. “Hello?” you call, voice trembling when Jungkook finally looks your way. The soft look he had given you all night is nowhere to be found, replaced with this rather unreadable expression. Something between annoyance and confusion if you had to guess. You don’t know, and the fact you don’t know makes you panic. Your chest feels tight when Seokjin begins speaking again.

“You know,” he says, “you’re quite something, __. Strong, confident. Beautiful.” Had you been anyone else, you might have been flattered by Kim Seokjin’s remarks, maybe would have swooned. He was, objectively speaking, a handsome man with a hefty bank account.

But if that was the criteria for a man to make you swoon, then the man on the bench in front of you checked all the same boxes three times over. The man who’s brows draw closer and closer together the longer you linger on the phone. Jungkook’s foot does one agonizing tap against the concrete and you find yourself stammering into the phone. “I think you’re drunk, Jin.”

A scoff. “I am,” he agrees, and doesn't even bother to hide it. “But you remind me of her, you know that? I like that.”

It’s like he knows something is going on on the line, because Jungkook visibly bristles when you sidestep in surprise. What was going on, your brain screams. Having your superior compare you to his infidel wife was definitely not something you saw coming tonight. “Uh, okay?” you say, “listen, Seokjin— Mr. Kim, I’m... I have a boyfriend. And I really lov—“

He cuts you off. Jungkook bristles at the sudden stop of your sentence. “Yeah, yeah,” Seokjin drawls, and you can feel the sheer terror of accidentally jeopardizing your relationship with Jungkook step aside for the briefest moment to allow some annoyance to seep through. Annoyed with Seokjin and his audacity, his tone, his voice. “Mrs. Kim used to say that about me,” he chuckles humorlessly, “I love you, I love you, I love you.” A long pause. You’re unsure of how to respond. “It’s not real,” Seokjin says, like it’s the most obvious thing in the entire world. “Love, that is.”

You clench your jaw, gathering your thoughts to respond when Seokjin beats you to it. “But you know what, love?” You don’t respond. Seokjin pushes on anyway. “Someone’s gonna cheat sooner or later— why not beat him to it?”

Your body reacts first, a startled gasp inhaled through your lips at his disrespectful preposition. Your phone slips out of your grasp. It bounces twice, lands on the ledge that gives way to the river, and you almost kick it in when Jungkook comes up behind you. “Hey, hey,” he says sternly, tugging you away from the phone you almost killed. “What’s wrong— what did he say?”

You exhale, face warm from the discomfort sitting heavy in your chest. “Nothing,” you huff, mind slightly foggy as you try to process that awkward conversation. “It’s— it was stupid,” you spit, pressing the heels of your palms against your temples, the raging anger and confusion making your head pound now.

You had always known Kim Seokjin wasn’t the most faithful man, that the infidelity ran both ways in his relationship. But you had never imagined he would ever compare you to her, his cheating wife, in an attempt to win you over. Furthermore, you’re downright disturbed by the fact he would even try to hit on you after all the mentoring he’d given you, all the polite smiles he’d flashed you, all the praise you had bestowed upon him to Jungkook.

Jungkook, whose jaw twitches as his hands graze your forearms. When you look at him again, you feel an immense wave of remorse wash over you at the way his own irritation is clouded by his worry for you. He had been wronged as well— disrespected just like you —but here he was, pushing his own emotions aside for your sake. He doesn’t want to see you upset. He was so good at dealing with your emotions, knew just what to do when things became too much.

“I’m sorry,” you mumble, lips pursed together. “I don’t know why— he’s never— I wouldn’t do that,” you settle on, voice wobbling when Jungkook’s jaw clenches. “Jungkook,” you frown, reaching for his hands, “I wouldn’t—“

He shushes you with another one of those gentle forehead bumps. “Calm down,” he says, voice deeper than usual. “I know you wouldn’t.”

Weirdly, it feels like you’ve committed a grave sin against your boyfriend. A crime. “I’m sorry,” you blubber anyway, heart thundering in your chest. “That was horrible,” you huff, desperately blinking away the stinging sensation behind your eyes. “You didn’t deserve to hear that.”

“Don’t cry,” Jungkook says, so soft and comforting; stable. You want his composure, his ability to process and understand things so quickly— his maturity. Sure he had been put off by Seokjin, but he had processed it all so quickly; adapted to the situation and stepped in to save you. Meanwhile, you nearly committed cellular murder because you couldn’t handle yourself. “He’s a weirdo,” he says, for both your sakes. “You didn’t do anything wrong, sweetheart.”

Still, you sniffle. “I’m sorry,” you say again, the heavy feeling in your chest lightening just a little bit when he pulls you into his arms.

“Crybaby,” he teases softly, a kiss on the crown of your head. You pinch his side. “Second phone you broke in a year.”

The mood for the riverwalk is off after that, and you only walk a few more meters before Jungkook decides it’s enough. “We can still enjoy ourselves at home,” he reassures you, and the way he tries to salvage that soft, fuzzy feeling from before is admirable. So Jungkook takes you home, holds your hand the whole drive back to your place, like he knows you’re still fragile from that extremely uncomfortable interaction, need him to hold you together. Jungkook’s emotional stability guards you like a shield, covers you in a wave of comfort as you calm down. You tell him about Seokjin’s preposition and he bristles. “Prick,” he murmurs beneath his breath, grip tightening just the tiniest bit. Your ring pinches against your skin a little painfully, but you say nothing.

There’s a box of flowers on your doorstep when you arrive, one that makes Jungkook pause at the sight. “Wonderful,” he drones, picking it up for you as you unlock the front door. It gets left on the coffee table, practically mocking the two of you as you remove your shoes and coats. “That’s your favorite flower,” Jungkook notes.

You glance at the expensive bouquet. “It is.”

Jungkook drops down onto your couch, eyes flickering to the meticulous arrangement in front of him. “You told him?” Not really. But back when you had thought Jungkook and you were engaged (read: last week), you had spent days looking at different floral shops that specialized in this flower, frequently leaving the tab open on your work computer. Seokjin must have seen it then. At your extended silence, Jungkook says, “nice.”

You frown, setting your heels on the shoe rack. “Baby, I didn’t,” you tell him softly, reaching for the zip on the back of your dress. It comes down, and after clearing your hips, it falls to the floor in a dark heap you pick up quickly. It leaves you scantily clad in a black lingerie set. Meanwhile, Jungkook drops his head back, glaring at your ceiling. Tentatively, you step over to him, toying with the fabric of your dress in your hands. “You said it was okay.”

“I know,” he sighs, an unexpected confession from him that makes you pause. Despite all you’ve been through, he still rarely highlighted situations that upset him. “It’s just,” he says, turning his head to look at your form again, eyes not drinking you in like you hoped he would. “It’s scary.”

The couch cushion dips beneath your weight when you settle beside him. “What is?”

Jungkook shrugs, avoiding your question by reaching for the TV remote on the coffee table, right beside the box of flowers Seokjin had sent. He opens up the Viki app in a flash— the one linked to his account —and has even loaded up the next episode of Secretary Kim when you question him again. “What’s scary, Jungkook?” you repeat.

On screen, there’s a beautiful scene on a bridge, the two leads happily conversing. It’s serene, something neither you nor Jungkook feel at the moment.

Eventually, he says, “you could leave.”

You pause. “What do you mean?” Leave? Where on earth would you leave to when this was your home? He doesn’t meet your gaze.

Another scene passes by on screen, some cheesy line and an even cheesier promise. Jungkook’s foot taps against the floor, the sound dull against the plush rug beneath you. It’s a nervous tick you’ve only seen him do at the height of truly stressful situations. Weird because just half an hour before you had dubbed him as the epitome of calm and collected at the river.

“I thought he was cool before.”

He did. But the word ‘cool’ didn’t always have the same meaning for Jungkook as it did for you.

In the past, Jungkook had frequently joked about having to meet Kim Seokjin and thank him for all the help he’s given you at work. After all, up until now, you had only ever had good things to say about the man, raving about his cool demeanor and respectable work ethics. Now, the memories paired with the conversation from earlier leave a bad taste in your mouth.

You’re a little confused with Jungkook right now; part of you had convinced yourself that whatever happened on the phone earlier with Seokjin was put behind you, marked off as an anomaly in the evening. After all, Jungkook himself had said it was okay. Park Seojoon appears on screen, and you can’t help but glare at the character, residue emotions from the river pushed off onto this innocent actor.

Still, Jungkook surprises you. “It’s just that—“ he sighs. And then, “what if you leave?”

You blink, eyes trained on his side profile and the way he’s nervously chewing through his bottom lip until it tints a red shade, gives way to sensitive skin when he bites too hard. “Why would I leave?”

He says nothing. On screen, Park Seojoon says something so cheesy and romantic that it would have otherwise made you cringe, made Jungkook soft. But he’s stiff as a board beside you instead. You almost think he’s going to disregard the entire conversation when he finally speaks again. “Well.” You perk up at the sound of his voice, overly aware of the way he’s started picking at the skin around his thumb again, another nasty habit you’ve been trying to help him get over. “He’s cool. Rich.”

“And so are you,” you offer, covering his hand with your own.

Jungkook ignores you, releasing a long, shaky exhale. Somehow, he’s exuding a similar energy as before; discontentment mixed with understanding. Like he’s greatly conflicted but forcing himself to remain calm. Another trembling inhale, and then Jungkook quietly recites, “everyone wants to sleep with their hot boss.”

You recoil just the slightest, brows pinched together at the absurd conclusion he’s drawn. “Baby, that was just a silly conversation,” you say slowly, slipping your hand into his. He squeezes so tight you’re afraid he’ll break your bones. “And we were joking—“

“I know!” he exclaims, enveloping your significantly smaller hand in both of his before bringing them up to his face, lips pressed against your knuckles. It’s not a kiss, more so a desperate need to feel you against him. Eyes wide, you can’t do anything but watch as that collected exterior slips away, revealing a whirlwind mess of emotions. It’s a rather unexpected show from Jungkook. “It was a joke. We were joking. But I’m—“ his jaw clenches. His voice is so tiny when he speaks again. “I get scared sometimes, __.”

His emotional outburst renders you speechless, watching as he squeezes his eyes shut, jaw clenching, hands trembling.

It’s a stark image change from the cool Jungkook that had comforted you at the river, had patted the back of your head when you had been so distraught. His chest heaves for air and you don’t know what to do; it’s always the other way around, him comforting you, that when it comes down to this you find yourself at a loss. It makes you feel like you don’t know enough about yourself or him or your relationship in general to help him, always so lost when things like this happen.

Jungkook has never been good at expressing negative emotions, always preferring to bottle them up and only show you his very best side. Granted, he’s been getting better at letting go lately, has whispered his doubts to you in the dead of night after a particularly grueling project, an uncomfortable social meeting. But he always waits until you’re half asleep and in the dark to tell you how he feels, hushed worries that you barely remember the next morning. And by then, Jungkook’s moved on from them anyway, flashes you a pretty smile and purposefully guides you away from that conversation. You know he’s started keeping a journal recently, but aside from seeing the blanks pages when he’d first gotten, you don’t have a clue what happened afterwards. It’s probably hidden away somewhere, his feelings locked up in a cupboard or a box, the secrets it holds never to be spoken of aloud.

He doesn’t like talking about his more personal problems, hoards them until you’re forced to intervene. Find him slumped over at his dining table with bags under his eyes, the skin on his lower lip bitten beyond belief.

Rarely does he sit down and express himself like this, lays his heart out carefully for you to see. Had he not said so right now, you would have never known Jungkook struggled with such doubts about you and your relationship.

(It makes your heart ache at the realization.)

Jungkook always acts like everything is okay, always forces himself to hold it together for the sake of you and, quite frankly, everyone else. He’s there when Taehyung breaks up with his girlfriends, pats him on the back and lets him run through every video game he has on his PS5. He’s there for Namjoon when his thesis becomes too much, proofreads it even though he doesn’t understand a word just for the sake of giving his best friend another perspective. Hell, he had even been there for Doyeon when her new landlord had tried to overcharge her, had carried the bulk of your argument when you ran off to try and fight with the old man.

(“He’s too nice sometimes,” she had murmured the next morning at her place. After the shouting match the night before, you had crashed with Doyeon on her new bed, your sweet boyfriend taking up her couch. Somehow, you and Jungkook had managed to knock a clean seventy-five bucks off her monthly bill. It wasn’t much, but for an apartment in the city it sure felt like a lot.

You had hummed, patting the top of his head on the way to the kitchen. “He’s a good boy,” you had said, heart thrumming when he instinctively pushed closer to your hand, nuzzling into you even in his sleep. “He cares about everyone a lot. Worries to death about his friends.”

The state of their relationship was weird; they were always fighting about one thing or another, ‘eternal enemies’ as Doyeon liked to claim.

But for the first time, she hadn’t denied they were, in fact, friends. Instead, she had quietly stood at the breakfast nook overlooking the living room with a somber look on her face that was completely unlike the Doyeon you knew. She didn’t respond with her usual backhanded compliments, didn’t even call him a gremlin either.

“He even worries about you, Miss Wicked Witch of the West,” you had teased, reaching over to pull Jungkook’s shirt down where it had ridden up, exposing his cute belly button to the cold apartment. She had sipped at her mug of coffee, eyes foggy and distant. “It just takes him a while.”

“He’s always cared about you though,” she had murmured then, and you had marked it off as her being half asleep. But Doyeon had given you this look, a look so profoundly wise, as if she was saying, “more than you’ll ever know.”)

Most importantly, Jungkook is always there for you. He holds you in his arms, strokes your back comfortingly whenever something goes wrong. Listens to your concerns and offers you advice, learns new things for the sole purpose of helping you out. Lets you make stupid decisions and always saves you at the last minute. And you want to repay him for all that, want to look after Jungkook like he does for everyone else. But it’s hard, it’s so fucking hard, when he doesn’t let you in, when he holds his emotions at bay for the sake of protecting yours. When you don’t even know where to start sometimes.

The beating of your heart is accompanied by a dramatic orchestral ensemble on screen, violins and flutes as the two lovers reconcile some issue with a kiss. Beside you, your own lover is one second away from falling apart. “Hey,” you say quietly, slipping your hand out of his to hesitantly place on his back instead. With your release, Jungkook uses his empty hands to drag over his face, hide himself from you. “I’m not going to leave you, Jungkook,” you try and comfort, “I love you.”

He shakes his head, dark locks bouncing around. “I know, I know,” he sighs, but it doesn’t sound like he believes you. It sounds like he’s forcing himself into composure again, jaw flexing as he shakes his head. “But— what if—” another aggravated huff, his thighs jumping anxiously. “You’ll get bored.” Not a question, but a statement.

“Of you?” you ask anyway. He nods. “I won’t.”

He sits up so suddenly you have to move away to avoid bumping into him. “You will,” he urges, finally looking at you, distress painted over every inch of his face. “That guy, that Seokjin, he sounds more interesting than me. He sounds cool and put together, like the world is his oyster and,” he rubs the heels of his hands against his eyes. “You talk about him sometimes and... and you call him a god, __,” he stresses, doesn’t leave room for you to object. “And I know you’re joking, but—“ a sharp inhale, and then, quietly, “everyone gets bored of me, __.”

Your frown deepens. “But I won’t,” you argue, confident in your claim, shifting onto your knees beside him. Your dress is thrown over the armrest of the couch, and the draft in your apartment makes goosebumps rise on your bare flesh. “You’re not boring, Jungkook,” you tell him, voice softening when his features pinch up, nose wrinkling as he wards off the stinging behind his eyes.

It’s teenage trauma. Jungkook had told you at least that much before, this crippling sense of loneliness and an inferiority complex that hindered him during an influential growth period of his life. It’s why he’s so quiet when he has so much to say, why he brings you along to every party he gets invited to; he’s never felt like he was enough by himself.

Sometimes, it leaks into his confessions. “I don’t deserve you,” he says frequently, but some days you want to hot glue him to a chair and force him to listen to every reason why he does and always will deserve you or anyone for that matter. “You make me better,” he claims, but he does that all on his own, lights up the world with his smile alone.

He’s gotten better, that much you’ve learned from Namjoon and Taehyung. And even you’ve noticed it on your own, watched as he animatedly talked with his friends and his coworkers, drew people naturally to him with his warm aura.

Even still, there’s moments where he relapses. Moments like this.

“I’m sorry,” he murmurs beside you, “I know I’m a handful—“

“You’re not,” you interrupt, cupping his soft cheek in your hand, turning him to face you. Jungkook leans into the touch, and your heart breaks in half when a tear escapes over his waterline, pretty eyes brimming with tears. “You’re not a handful, Jungkook,” you tell him, shuffling closer until you can press your forehead against his. The truth is, you don’t know how to comfort him, but this is how he’s always comforted you; it feels nice when he does it for you. “You’re just enough,” you say, voice soft because it feels like your precious boy is about to fall apart in your arms, his shallow breaths rivaling the volume of the television. “You’ve always been enough.”

He sniffles, and another tear tickles the side of your thumb, catching the light. “I’m sorry,” he repeats anyway, a disbelieving chuckle tacked on at the end.

“Don’t be,” you shush, pushing away a strand of hair when he leans closer. His frown is still prominent, pink lips red and soft under your thumb when you tap your finger against them. “You can tell me when things worry you, you know,” you inform him, heart swelling when his eyes fall shut and he leans into your touch. He’s so handsome, the cute little mole beneath his lip begging to be kissed. “I’ll always listen.”

Jungkook hums, breathing evening out. “I know you will,” he says. “But I like listening to your voice more, and I can’t do that when I’m talking.”

You snort and Jungkook finally lets a tiny smile slip. “Don’t flirt with me so soon after your meltdown,” you mumble, kissing his cheek softly.

Jungkook chuckles, real this time, and sniffles right afterwards. “I’ll flirt with you whenever I want.” And, because he’s just so full of surprises tonight, he sniffles once more before he’s unceremoniously tackling you back onto the couch. You squeal, the TV remote digging into your back painfully. It has the volume accidentally skyrocketing, startling the both of you with an ear-shattering orchestral piece at the height of some emotional scene. Jungkook scrambles to free the device and lower the volume before your eardrums burst. “I didn’t even know your TV could go that loud,” he says, and he’s speaking normally but the deafening violins are still reverberating in your head, making him sound quieter than he really is.

“Come here,” you say instead, and he obeys, crawling into your arms, mouth hovering just over yours. “You feeling better?”

Jungkook nods, dark hair bouncing. “You make me better,” he tries, but after tonight’s realization, you respond to his corny words with a pinch against his doughy cheek instead.

“Don’t say that,” you frown, toying with one of the earrings decorating his ear. The tip of his nose is flushed red, the exertion from crying catching up to him. His lashes are dark, probably feel so heavy with the residual tears that cling to them.

Jungkook repositions himself, guides your legs around his waist. “Why not? It’s true.” He glances at your mouth. “You make my life better.”

“Wrong,” you say bluntly, brushing his hair back with your hands. “Your own perception and understanding of your experiences makes your life better. I just happen to be in it.” Jungkook looks the tiniest bit surprised at your suddenly logical argument. “Trust me, I saw it in a documentary the other day.”

At that he laughs, full and loud, pecking your lips once with a sweet smile on his face. “Now I know you’re lying,” he grins, gently nudging his nose against yours. The drama on the TV is but a quiet hum compared to the pounding of your heart in your chest when he looks at you like that. “Because you don’t even like documentaries.”

You kiss him softly, holding his hair back for him. He tastes a little bit like the chocolate cake he had at the restaurant and the lemonade he drank (he didn’t indulge in the sweet wine with you because he needed to drive). His lips mold perfectly against yours, and he sighs softly when he finally draws back. “But I like you,” you purr.

Jungkook’s eyes darken, one heavy exhale fanning across the lower half of your face. You readjust the leg around his waist, pull him closer just the slightest bit. “Don’t flirt with me so soon after my meltdown,” he repeats, lips brushing against yours. You chuckle. “You don’t know what that means to me.” You can roughly guess, but that opportunity is taken away when Jungkook slots his mouth against yours, soft lips molding to yours. His tongue swipes across your bottom lip, wastes no time slipping in when you open for him, hot and wet.

Jungkook’s fingers are just as warm when he trails them up the back of your thigh, pulls you impossibly closer until the buckle on his belt is pressed flush against your mound. A tiny whimper escapes your lips, chest jumping just the slightest from the pressure. It makes Jungkook pull away with an easygoing grin, chocolate eyes half-lidded. “You okay?” he murmurs, breath a little shaky from the kiss. You nod, tangling your fingers behind his head and pulling him in close again.

He evades your puckered lips, ducking down to press his own against your throat, right beneath your jaw. “Ugh,” you groan, digging your nails into his back through his satin shirt. “I wanted a kiss.”

Jungkook nips at your skin, this tiny gesture that couldn’t hurt even if he tried. “You always want a kiss,” he retorts softly, the quiet smack of his lips filling your ears as he bestows a series of smooches against your skin. And it’s so devastatingly tender how he handles you, like you’re made of glass and will break at a moment’s notice, like he wants to treasure your body for the rest of his—

Jungkook chomps down, hard, and you hiss. “Sit still,” he orders, soothing over the bite with one broad lick of his tongue.

You whimper. “That hurt.”

“And it’ll hurt even more if you keep moving,” he warns you, and before you can ask what that even means, he’s leaving another stinging bite just further down. It’s at the midway point of your neck, right in front, and you can feel your heartbeat in your throat when he sucks a painful mark over it. “There,” he says, mostly to himself. “All mine.”

Your legs tighten around him, and you fight down the wave of heat that threatens to consume you when he places one final kiss over the second mark— the hickey.

Jungkook doesn’t usually leave them. In fact, you can rarely recall a time where he had purposefully gone out of his way to mark you up like this. It was always accidental, always unplanned, because he knew how troublesome it was for you to cover them up for work the next morning. Work, where your coworkers and your bosses and Seokjin could see.

Brows pinched together, your brain begins to draw a connection, one that Jungkook is soon confirming himself. “Everyone will see that now,” he hums, kissing a trail down your neck.

Of course.

You pat the back of his head in amusement, hiding a smile against his soft locks. Before you can say anything more, maybe tease him for being so cute, there’s a hand on your hip that snaps you out of your scheming. Jungkook lifts his head, does that endearing little head shake that pushes his hair out of his eyes, before leaning in for another languid kiss.

It’s even slower than the first, mostly because he’s a little too preoccupied with running his hands over your body now. It starts at your shoulder, teasingly snaps the strap of your bra as you push your tongue down his throat. Jungkook whimpers, that pretty sound that makes you desperate to hear more. It’s the same sound that he always makes when he wants to be pampered, wants you to kiss his entire body while he lays there and takes it.

And you’re all too ready to act on it.

Duty calls and you’re there to answer, tilting his head for him with your hands against his cheeks. He sighs against you, breath trembling as it tickles across your skin. That soft and tender way that makes you melt because he’s just so precious, so dreamy.

But you’re too caught up in your plotting to remember the hand he’s got on your hip, the one that teases the waistband of your panties with one lone finger. It’s only when Jungkook pulls away from your inviting mouth, his other hand holding you down by your shoulder, that you’re snapped back into reality. His lips are swollen and red, slick from your tongue, and so tantalizingly kissable. He huffs out a breath, eyes flickering over your face. “Can I touch you,” he husks, and gives into the temptation to press a kiss against your jaw.

“Yes, please,” you shiver, hypnotized by his hungry stare.

Jungkook wastes no time, pressing another kiss against the bruising mark over your throat that dissolves into a series of lighter smooches he trails down between your breasts. His hands come up to cup your boobs over your bra, giving them one harsh squeeze that has you releasing a long exhale as he moves between the valley and down your tummy, over your belly button. “Open,” he says at your pubic bone, carefully guiding your legs apart until you’re spread wide for him.

The dark panties you’re wearing tonight— the super expensive ones you had spent an hour measuring your body for the exact sizing —receive one light kiss over the front. “Always so pretty for me,” Jungkook murmurs, tracing one lone finger down the middle. Your stomach contracts when he nudges it against you, the soft material of your panties just barely pushed between your folds.

As his hand occupies itself with some relatively light foreplay, Jungkook tasks himself with leaving another tingling mark against your skin. This time, it’s on the inside of your thigh. He starts it off slowly, a few littered kisses against the skin until he deems one spot worthy enough and abruptly sinks his teeth into you. “Not so hard,” you whimper, reaching down to bury your hands in his hair.

Jungkook lets it go, sloppily licking over the area. “You like it hard,” he husks, meeting your gaze as he licks one, long stripe over the tender skin. “Don’t you?” You nod demurely, pressing your knuckles against your lips to hold back a tiny moan from slipping past your lips.

With that new mark blooming over your skin, Jungkook transfers his attention to your pussy, hidden beneath the soft material of your panties. One finger hooks under the hem, tucking them aside until he can see you in your entirety. “Fuck,” he groans, pressing one light kiss over your clit that makes you inhale sharply, fingers digging into his scalp. Jungkook throws one final glance your way before letting his tongue slip past his lips, the very tip flicking against your clit.

Your breathing becomes shallow, anticipation building in the pits of your stomach as he slowly but surely begins playing with you. His tongue is so warm and wet, nudges your throbbing clit, nose pressed against your mound. “Mmm,” he moans, eyes fluttering shut as his mouth works wonders.

“Ah,” you gasp, whiny and high-pitched, when he dips one finger past your wet folds. The entry is seamless, his pointer finger sinking into the velvet walls of your cunt as his tongue swirls against your hardened bud. “Jungkook,” you mewl, knocking your heel against his shoulder. Jungkook huffs, suctions his lips around your clit. The cold metal of the rings he always wears— the duo set from that Chrome Hearts brand he likes so much —presses against the trembling lips of your pussy, makes your back arch when he twists his finger inside of you.

He’s so precise with his tongue, knows just how long and how hard to lick against your pulsing clit until you’re trembling, thighs quivering. Briefly, he pulls away, flicks his hair to the side in one suave motion that lets you see his dark eyes when he glances back up at you again, covered in a thick sheen of lust that makes them appear almost black as opposed to his usual warm brown. His hands reach for the waistband of your panties, tug them off with one fluid pull.

“So pretty for me,” he murmurs, the end of his words laced with a slight rasp that makes your hips jump. “All for me,” he says, roughly pushing his finger into you again. The harshness makes your entire body tighten up in surprise, eyes fluttering shut when he slips his middle finger alongside his pointer this time around.

“Baby, wait,” you whimper, walls fluttering around the two digits. Jungkook leans back in, presses a chaste kiss against your clit that makes your breathing stall as he thrusts his fingers into you.

He ignores your cries, locks his lips at the juncture where your thigh meets your body, sensitive skin that bruises all too easily when he sucks against it too hard. “Only for me,” he sighs, all pretenses discarded as he begins rapidly and roughly fucking his fingers into you. It’s intense, has your thighs quaking as he speeds them up.

The coil in your stomach tightens, and you have to bite down on your knuckles to stop the litany of whimpers from slipping past your lips when Jungkook ducks down again. He bypasses your quivering clit, warm tongue licking at the warm, wet folds around his fingers instead. The proximity makes the tip of his round nose brush along the length of your cunt, a sight and sensation that makes you moan, his bangs harshly tugged away from his forehead to give you the perfect view.

It’s with a particularly hard shove and twist combination of his fingers into your clenching walls that you cum, a gasp caught in your throat as your hips push toward him, chasing the feeling Jungkook bestows upon you. Your breathing is a mess, inhales too short, your exhales inconsistent, as Jungkook slows the speed of his fingers inside of you, lets your cum ooze out around them, coat his fingers and his rings.

“No,” you cry, watching that look come over his face when he withdraws his hand, the look that usually follows him sucking your cum into his mouth. “Jungkook, you don’t have to do that—” you whine, reaching for his wrist and yanking it towards you.

Jungkook follows, crawls back up beside you as he chases his own sticky fingers. “It’s mine,” he urges, has this weird look in his eyes you don’t think you’ve ever seen before. And just as quickly as it crosses his features, he’s lurching forward to catch his own fingers in his mouth. It’s lewd, the way his tongue wraps around them, leaves them sleek under the TV glow, tattoos and rings glistening. He has the audacity to moan, eyes fluttering shut as his devious tongue slips down between his fingers, so long and precise. There’s a tiny noise that tears itself from your throat, one that has him flickering his clouded gaze up to you as his fingers are released from between his own lips. “You like that,” he murmurs, wet fingers trailing down your cheek, capturing your chin to turn your face his way completely.

His tongue is sinful as it slips past your lips again, the tangy taste of yourself clinging to him. His breathing feels hot, suffocating. But his kisses are so good, make your mind go blank. So blank, that the fingers that rub at your clit surprise you completely. “Kook,” you gasp, breaking away from him in surprise.

Jungkook doesn’t let you get far, capturing your mouth with his again. The two fingers you had felt on your chin are gone, firmly pressed against your swollen clit, experimentally rubbing against it. Never mind the fact you were still sensitive from your first orgasm, thighs quivering when he drags them against the wet, soft skin. It makes you shudder, breaking away from him a second time for a desperately needed inhale of fresh air. Jungkook follows behind closely, pressing kisses over your jawline, your chin, as his fingers continue moving against your clit.

He has them pressed together, rubbing at the front of your slit where that bundle of nerves is hidden. It makes your stomach contract, hips jerking forward into the touch in an effort to match him, to speed up the process. “You were made for me, pretty girl,” Jungkook huffs against your cheek, nose pressed against your skin because he’s just so close, practically molded into your side as his fingers send rhythmic shocks of ecstasy up your spine.

Your mouth drops open, stuttered gasps filtering through your lips as Jungkook takes advantage of your sensitive body to draw out another orgasm. But there’s a weird sensation that builds in your stomach this time, one that brings with it a sense of panic. “Wait—“ you gasp, fisting the silky material of his shirt beneath one clenched fist. “Jungkook,” you warn, toes curling.

He responds with a harsh nip against your lower lip that makes you whimper. “Go ahead,” he purrs, rubbing his fingers over you at an insane speed, one that has your juices sloppily spread over your pussy, makes you buck into him and moan against his mouth.

The feeling grows, an intense, unfamiliar thing that you rarely recall ever feeling before, gasping for air as Jungkook’s fingers caress your clit, pressing down hard. “Fffuck, fuck,” you sob, mouth opening in a silent scream, eyes rolling backwards as you feel your pussy lips contract harder than ever before, thighs quivering as your juices squirt out of you, lower body reduced to jello as Jungkook quickens his movements, wrists jerking back and forth as your pleasure sprays out of you. “Ju— Jungkook,” you wail, forcefully slamming your thighs shut when he doesn’t stop, the pleasure seemingly never-ending under such a torturous touch. “Stop—stop,” you beg, eyes filling with tears that spill over when his trapped hand manages one final rough rub against your clit accompanied by a final gush of wetness.

Only then does he stop, leaning back on his knees to drink you in with dark eyes that make you quiver. There’s no trace of his usual post-orgasm cockiness, the smile he’ll flash you, the teasing jabs. Nothing, just a frankly terrifying gaze that has you self-consciously pressing your hands over your chest.

Jungkook doesn’t take kindly to it, roughly snatching one of your wrists up until you’re sitting up, the traces of your own orgasm present in the damp couch cushions beneath you, inner thighs coated in a thin sheen of your own pleasure. Jungkook leans in close, nose bumping against yours. “You came like that for me,” he says quietly, chest rising and falling with shallow breaths. You nod, eyes wide and teary when he reaches for the front of his shirt, giving it the same treatment he usually gives yours; two hands at the front, yanking it apart until the buttons are torn from their stitches and bouncing across your floor.

He throws it off to the side, his tan skin highlighted by the cool tones of the television, the dark sleeve of his tattoo especially prominent. The black ink almost looks blue under this light. You’re so distracted by the perfect swirls and doodles on Jungkook’s skin that you don’t realize that same hand is reaching for you until it’s too late, long fingers wrapping around your throat to jerk you forward, head tipping back to look up at him. “Say it, sweet girl,” he murmurs, eyes half-lidded. “Tell me you’re mine.”

The fingers around your throat squeeze once and then slowly begin tightening. You gasp, meeting his hooded gaze with yours, lips quivering for a response that’s stuck in your throat, trapped by your own surprise and tightening airways. Frantically, you reach for his wrists with both hands, not to pull Jungkook’s hand away, but to ground yourself from the hazy cloud of lust the moment evokes.

Still, your body isn’t as strong as you thought, and once Jungkook reaches a certain tightness around your throat you find yourself coughing. Instantly, he loosens his grip. But not too much. “I- I’m yours,” you rasp out, gasping for air.

For now, it satisfies Jungkook enough for him to release you. And while you’re grateful for the rush of fresh air that fills your lungs, the phantom ghost of his grip around your throat sends a new gush of wetness between your thighs. One that grows tenfold when Jungkook reaches for his belt, undoes it easily. It comes off with one fluid motion, carelessly shucked off to the side as his attention moves to the front of his pants instead.

He doesn’t let you sit around uselessly. “On your knees,” he says, so quietly you almost don’t hear it. “Sit on your knees facing the table.”

You blink slowly, the dry tears on your cheeks leaving stiff trails against your makeup. It takes a moment for your brain to process his request, one long second that has Jungkook pausing in his movements, leveling you with one solemn glare that eventually has you springing into action. You hastily slip off the couch, shuffling toward the coffee table between it and the television. The rug is soft beneath your knees, a luxury you can’t enjoy to the fullest because there’s a ball of excitement and fear stuck in your throat. (Right beneath your bruised skin and recuperating windpipes.) Sitting back on your calves, it feels like every nerve is standing stiff as you await his instructions.

“Bra off,” Jungkook says from behind you, and you’re startled by the sudden ripping of stitches behind you, almost turning to look at him. He stops you with one hand around the back of your neck, drawing a surprised gasp from you. “Sit still,” he commands, your back stiff straight, eyes focused on the screen. After a beat, Jungkook lets you go, pats the back of your head gingerly. “Good girl.”

A whimper catches in your throat at the praise, and you barely manage to bite down on it in time, hurriedly reaching behind you. Your hands fidget over the clasps on your bra, and you nearly jump out of your skin when one lone finger traces down your spine, undoing your bra for you. You don’t know why, but you say, “thank you.”

The television changes scenes in front of you, the bright colors a stark contrast to the darkness of Jungkook’s eyes. Your hands tremble in front of you, fingers anxiously tangling with each other. A few inches beside you, there’s a dark red box filled with the flowers from—

Suddenly, your vision goes dark, hands instinctively reaching up to your eyes. The pads of your fingers come in contact with a soft material, smooth and silky. Just like— “Is this… ?” you murmur, hands sliding across the makeshift blindfold Jungkook’s made for you, the same texture as his shirt had been.

He doesn’t grace you with an answer, just a hand against your hip as he, presumably, settles behind you. “Does it matter?” Jungkook says instead, voice all too close to your ear. Your entire body locks up, hands quickly returning to their spot against the coffee table.

Just as you’d suspected, Jungkook is all too close now, hands crawling over your body. They start at your waist, massage the skin tenderly, lovingly, before gliding up to cup your breasts. You shiver, a quiet exhale escaping you as Jungkook rubs his palms over your boobs, trapping your stiff nipples between his fingers. A sound threatens to escape you, and you trap it behind a bitten lip, fists clenched against the table before you. “You know,” Jungkook says conversationally, like he’s not pinching your nipples enough to make you squirm. “Who else do you think can make you come like this?”

You brain lags. “W- What?” you stutter, thighs pressing together to ward away the arousal. Not like they’re already sticky from before, from when Jungkook had made you squirt.

Jungkook doesn’t miss a beat, pressing a kiss against your shoulder that he trails up to your ear, nibbling at your earlobe. “Who else,” he says slowly, “can make you come like this?”

It’s not a trick question— no one could. You tell Jungkook as much. “I— no one,” you answer, rolling your lips in when he kisses the tender spot beneath your ear again.

His kisses feel loud, but not as loud as his voice when he says, “exactly.” You swallow, gripping at the edge of the coffee table when he releases your boobs, trails one hand between your thighs, the other around your throat to pull you backwards against his chest. It makes your hands flail, landing against the tops of his thick thighs.

Jungkook holds you close, fingers tightening around your throat teasingly. “No one else can please you like you want,” he exhales, letting his fingers trail over your skin. “Not the guy on tv, not your exes, not the fucking loser at your job,” he hisses, lips against your ear. “No one,” he reiterates, voice softer now as he presses a kiss against you. “No one but me.”

And it’s true.

You can’t even muster your usual mouthy, bratty attitude when Jungkook serves you cold hard facts like this. Not when you can feel his aching member press against the small of your back, rest perfectly in the slight dip between your ass cheeks. “Isn’t that right, sweet girl?” he murmurs, voice low.

You nod, tummy tightening when he uses the hand between your thighs to spread them apart. “Only you,” you agree, voice feathery.

Jungkook hides a grin against your skin, a mean chuckle escaping him when he rests his forehead against your shoulder. “Fuck,” he says, releasing your throat. “Such a good girl,” he praises, hands on your hips again. He uses them to encourage you up onto your knees, hips bumping into the edge of the table as he shuffles you forward. “Bend,” he says quietly, palm flat on the center of your back, pushing you down until your belly button is pressed against the cold wood, boobs swinging forward just the slightest. “Perfect.”

Jungkook shuffles up behind you, soothes a hand over your hip when you flinch at the first press of his cock against your folds. “You’re okay,” he comforts, voice like honey as he lines himself up. Your folds are slippery and wet, loose from your arousal and the two orgasms he’s already given you.

Despite all that, the first push of his engorged cock past the tight muscles makes you gasp. “Baby, that’s,” you moan, nails scratching against the coffee table to make a sound that you would otherwise find uncomfortable. “I—“

Jungkook pants behind you, cock sinking further and further in. “I’ve got you,” he husks. His voice is like the light at the end of the tunnel, your dark vision forcing you to rely on him entirely as he guides you through the motions. “Made for me,” he repeats, voice airy.

You nod jerkily, arms trembling as his cock plunges deeper inside of you. “Made for you,” you gasp, head falling forward, forehead pressed against the cold surface in front of you.

He moans, and there’s one deafening moment of silence when he finally reaches the hilt, soft pubic hairs at the base of his cock brushing against your folds. It’s a familiar sensation, having him buried inside of you, but it’s always different when he’s doing it from behind. He always feels fuller, bigger, mushroom tip practically kissing your cervix.

“Kook,” you whimper, walls unintentionally contracting around him when he lingers a second too long. “Move.”

“Fuck, fuck,” he curses behind you. “I know, it’s just—“ he pauses, squeezes your hip so hard, you’re certain it’ll bruise. “I wanna… y’know,” he groans, dropping his head against your back, warm breath fanning across your slightly sweaty skin.

It makes something in your stomach click into place, shifting back just the slightest. The small drag around your lips makes you brave. “Then do it,” you urge, desperate for any sort of friction.

Jungkook practically growls, bucking into you once. “No,” he says, like he’s battling with himself, faced with a mental hurdle he can only cross alone. “You don’t understand,” he sneers, suddenly snapping back into position behind you, pulling you flush against his pelvis once more. It makes you whimper.

“I kinda do—“

“You don’t,” Jungkook hisses, forcefully thrusting his hips into you enough to make your hips knock painfully against the edge of the coffee table, a startled moan falling from between your lips. And from there, it’s like you’ve unleashed a beast, because Jungkook shows you no mercy as he begins fucking you, his fat cock slipping in and out of you, his angry head flirting with your entrance. “I wanna fucking breed you,” he sneers, fingers digging into the skin around your waist to hold you still as he bucks his hips forward.

His vulgarity makes your skin heat up, the warmth probably tangible over your sloppily made blindfold, eyes wide despite the fabric that covers them. “That—” you gasp, thighs trembling with each powerful thrust.

“It’s too much, I fucking know,” he huffs dryly, releasing one hip to press against your shoulders, roughly shoving you forward until your breasts are pressed against the surface, arms bent up beside you to stop yourself from hitting your head. “But— But,” he shudders, suddenly stopping his thrusts to grind his cock against you instead, pussy lips quivering around his girthy member. “I wanna,” he pants, “wanna see you so fucking full of me, because— you’re mine, __,” he seethes, “right?”

You nod blindly, dumbly, brain too flooded with the stimulation he’s bestowing upon you to think properly. “I- I am,” you confirm, gasping for air. “And you’re mine,” you manage to get out, one hand slapping down against the coffee table when he draws his cock out, slams himself back into you quickly.

“I’m yours,” Jungkook slurs behind you, slowly picking up his pace again. The hand on your back lets go, and it’s with trembling arms that you manage to push yourself back onto your forearms, one hand blindly reaching for the hand he’s got gripping at your hips.

“Oh my god,” you whimper, the sounds coming from your connected bodies so lewd and obscene, disgustingly wet when Jungkook slips back inside. He surges forward again, and you try to catch your balance, knees quivering underneath the force of his thrusts. Your hand slides over the tabletop in a feeble effort to hold onto something, anything. You can’t see, and even if you could there’s not much to hold onto on a flat surface.

Except the box your hand knocks into. Your confusion lasts for only about a second because then Jungkook is ramming his cock into you, over and over, until you’re certain your hips are going to bruise and your knees are going to give out. Jungkook’s moans are soft and feathery, sighs that fan over your shoulder and make your back arch, eyes rolling backwards for the briefest second as if you were possessed.

“Mine,” he whimpers, desperate and needy, fingernails digging into your skin as he pushes on. “Gonna be mine forever,” he growls. “Gonna— Gonna be so pretty and big,” he moans, “tits so fucking full.” The image he puts in your mind makes you dizzy.

You nod dumbly, knuckles bumping against the box a second time. “Jungkook,” you choke out, fingers blindly nudging the box aside. But there’s no strength behind it, your entire body feeling weak and useless, all the energy concentrated in the coil in your stomach, the one that grows and tightens with every entrance of Jungkook’s cock into your pulsing walls. “There’s— There’s something,” you gasp, pinky finger tapping against it.

Behind you, Jungkook stills, harsh breaths deafeningly loud. Louder than the television and the corny music that plays, the mindless chatter of the characters you couldn’t name even if you tried. “Why would you...” Jungkook huffs, irritation lacing his words.

You don’t get to question it, because a second later his finger is tucking itself beneath your blindfold, yanking it off carelessly. It makes your head crane backwards, a tiny yelp torn from your lips as the blinding glow of the TV attacks your poor eyes at full force. Jungkook’s long since stopped his rapid thrusts, and it’s only when you glance off to the side that you realize why.

It’s the stupid box of flowers Seokjin had sent you, the one Jungkook had placed on the coffee table when you first got home.

Behind you, Jungkook releases one long exhale, both of you looking at the arrangement with various degrees of discomfort. “Did you like them,” he murmurs, cock throbbing inside of you.

You shake your head, a soft, “no,” falling from your lips. The muscles in your thighs quiver like mad.

Jungkook says nothing, but you watch as one inked arm stretches out from behind you, the movement of his hips pushing his cock deeper into you. A tiny whimper catches in your throat, watching as Jungkook hooks a finger over the lip of the box. One swift tug has it gliding over the tabletop, coming to a stop right beside your forearm. Jungkook leans back, the silence terrifying.

“Did you think they were pretty?” he asks, tracing one finger down your spine. Your lower lip trembles as your eyes scan over the bouquet, at the pretty color selection and lovely scent that joined together to overwhelm your senses.

“No,” you say, but it feels like a lie.

And Jungkook thinks so too, wrapping one hand around your throat and pulling you back forcefully. It’s the same as he did earlier, but with his cock deep inside your pussy, it sends a shock throughout your entire nervous system, a sob tearing itself from within you as he unintentionally pushes himself deeper inside. “Did you,” he says a second time, practically seething, “think Seokjin’s flowers were pretty?”

Your eyes flicker nervously across the screen in front of you, but everything is a blur, Jungkook’s harsh breathing against your ear. “Yes,” you confess, whimpering when his fingers tighten around your throat, press down against your windpipe as he inhales sharply. “But they’re just flow—“ He squeezes your throat so hard, your eyes nearly bulge out of their sockets, mind growing fuzzy. Eventually, he lets go and you dissolve into a fit of coughs, bent over the coffee table again as Jungkook slips his stiff cock out from within you. “I’m sorry,” you sniffle, throwing a teary-eyed look over your shoulder.

What you’re not expecting is for Jungkook to grab that same shoulder and roughly push you onto your side away from the coffee table, falling onto the fluffy rug as he shoves you down. “Something pretty for a pretty girl,” he sneers, biting down a frankly maniacal grin.

“What?” you exhale, probably looking at him with the same maniacal look in your eyes.

(You were made for each other, so crazy and in love.)

Jungkook stretches one toned arm out, and you flinch when he uses that same beautiful arm to send the box of flowers flying over the edge of the coffee table, a hard thwack resounding throughout the room when they land face down on the other side, petals against the floor, water dripping out from inside.

With those out of the way, Jungkook wastes no time flipping you over, face shoved down against the soft rug as he angles your hips up. “Thinking about someone else when I’m right here,” he growls, ramming his cock back into you with no warning. You sob, clawing at nothing as he bucks forward. “What a mean girl,” Jungkook scolds.

“I- I wasn’t,” you defend weakly, shivering as he snaps his hips against you, the rug irritating your cheek when the motion sends you forward. Jungkook uses the hands on your hips to pull you back, your skin clapping together loudly.

“You think Seokjin would— would fuck you like this?” he spits, using you like a toy as he fucks basically for himself, cock sliding in and out of your squelching walls. “You think he’d push you down and—and call you a stupid girl?”

You shake your head, eyes squeezed shut to fight the wave of tears threatening your waterline. Truthfully, it doesn’t make much of a difference, especially not when Jungkook yanks your hips back again, your entrance sensitive from all the friction. “No, no,” you sob. ”He wouldn't.”

Jungkook scoffs, not bothering to slow his pace down. “Of course he wouldn’t,” he spits, and then, strikes your ass. Two hard cracks of his palm, rings and all, against the globes of your ass. You wail, unconsciously jerking away only for Jungkook to drag you back. “Stupid girl,” Jungkook sighs, cock twitching inside of you. You can feel the beads of precum oozing out from the tip of his cock inside you, their warmth making you shudder.

Your other ass cheek receives the same treatment, two harsh smacks that leave the skin tingling, blood rising to the surface. “Stupid, stupid girl,” he repeats, palms rubbing over your cheeks for a brief second, only to strike down again. “Aren’t you?” You nod, fat tears dripping out of the corner of your eyes and down onto the fluffy rug beneath you. Your behind stings, pain blossoming over your skin. But it’s the good kind, the one that has drool escaping from the corner of your lips from how overwhelmed it leaves you.

“I- I’m a stupid girl,” you agree, your words punctuated by a series of tiny sobs and sniffles. Your walls feel sensitive, raw, from his thrusts. You’re ready to come, trembling hands slithering down to reach for your clit.

“Don’t,” Jungkook warns, snatching your arm up and twisting it behind you.

You cry, tears and drool against the rug. “I wanna come,” you whimper, trying your other hand only for it to meet a similar demise. “Please,” you sniffle, turning your face the other way as if the angle will somehow be different.

“You don’t come until I say so,” Jungkook hisses, using his grip on your wrists to tug you onto his cock. You moan, choke on your own saliva from the force, the tip of his cock kissing your cervix for real this time. It renders you stupid, just like Jungkook had called you, chin trembling as your eyes roll backwards. Behind you, Jungkook grunts something deep and raspy. “Fffuck,” he spits, pistoning his hips into your inviting heat. “You were doing so good tonight—“ a particular brutal buck of his hips, a loud moan torn from your lips “—but first those fucking flowers and now this?”

The rhythm of his deep thrusts cut your moans into stuttered little cries, your words broken with every ram of his cock inside of you. Your walls feel worn, every brush sending a tingling shock up your spine. “I- I’m sorry,” you weep, shoulders shaking from your own tears and the rumbling orgasm that’s just about ready to snap.

Jungkook says nothing, too busy shoving his cock inside of you to grace you with a response. Instead, you’re subjected to his relentless thrusts, sharp gasps from his pretty mouth. “Fuck,” he pants, releasing your wrists after one particular thrusts, your walls clenching around him painfully when he draws his cock out.

“I can’t,” you sniffle, knees giving out before he can catch you, sadly sinking down onto the plush rug. “Kook, I—”

Jungkook makes a sound, something between a growl and a roar in the back of his throat as he follows behind you, planting two firm hands on the sides of your head to use as leverage to fuck himself in. With your thighs pressed flat together, the squeeze is tighter than ever before, and your eyes roll backwards as he gets to work, walls fluttering from the overstimulation.

“I’ve got you, sweetheart,” he pants, all games thrown aside as he begins pounding his cock past your folds, deep into your contracting walls, until that tight spring in your stomach gives out and you’re clenching up beneath him, entire body going stiff for one long beat.

“I’m sorry, I’m sorry,” you weep, thighs quivering as you cream his cock, make his movements so slippery and wet, almost dangerous when he’s going this fast. His name falls from your trembling lips, every nickname and pet name you’ve ever given him mindlessly blubbered through your orgasm. Jungkook pays you no mind, thighs tensing up as he chases his high, short breaths and moans filling the space as he fucks himself into you. Until, finally, a few deep strokes later, he’s coming with a shuddered cry of your name on his tongue, collapsing over you, forehead pressed to your back as he catches his breath.

“Fuck,” he groans one last time, body going slack very quickly. He slumps down beside you, softening cock slipping out of your tender folds.

The floor between the coffee table and the couch is dark, the television glow not reaching down here. Even still, the sweat clinging to Jungkook makes him look like a sparkly Twilight vampire, the dip between his pecs collecting the smallest pool of sweat. You can’t stop yourself from running your pointer finger along the skin, over his nipple. His pec jumps deliciously under the attention. “Stop,” Jungkook sighs, catching your wrist in his, pressing his lips to your knuckles in an attempt to distract you. “Or I’ll really get you pregnant next time.”

You push yourself onto your elbows, pinching his doughy cheek. “You won’t,” you tease. Jungkook flicks his hair away from his eyes to level you with a look you’ve never seen before, not a trace of his usual post-sex playfulness to be found. It has you retracting your hand, eyes wide when he doesn’t stand down. Still, you can’t lose. “...No you won’t,” you repeat, quieter, almost unsure. Almost a question.

Jungkook rolls his eyes, tugging you into his arms. He’s all sweaty and sticky, just like you. He’s lucky he doesn’t have four separate loads of cum— three from you, one from him —sticking between his thighs. “Keep telling yourself that,” he pants, so smoothly. Too smoothly. It makes you clench your thighs, something Jungkook doesn’t miss. “Stop it,” he warns a second time.

“You’re just so dreamy,” you whine, sitting back up to play with his hand. “Like, when you made me squirt?” He chuckles softly, eyes fluttering shut. “Not gonna lie, I thought I saw the answer to the universe for a second.”

He’s worn out today, more than usual, that he doesn’t bother gracing you with a response. But it had been a long day for Jungkook; from planning an entire date, to the Seokjin debacle, to the crazy hot sex he’d gifted you. It was only reasonable. You reward his efforts with a soft peck against his cheek that makes him smile, a light blush painting his cheeks. “You did good today,” you hum, patting chest comfortingly.

“Felt like I was in a Viki drama,” he confesses after a moment, has that tiny smile on his face that makes the apples of his cheeks especially round, especially cute. “The kind that have twelve plot lines going on.”

You laugh, snuggling beside him. The rug feels dirty, but so do you so the feeling is cancelled out or whatever. “You’d be the Park Seojoon of any Viki drama,” you tell him, and Jungkook laughs.

That loud and airy one he reserves only for you.

epilogue

Namjoon calls Jungkook’s phone a little after eleven, talking your ear off about some date he’d gone on while Jungkook is in the shower. You tell him about what happened with Seokjin and like all respectable college mentors, he just about flips. “You can sue him,” Namjoon hisses, furious for you. Not that you aren’t anymore, but in a weird act of impulsiveness, Jungkook had gone outside and ran the stupid box of flowers over with his car as you watched from the open window of your apartment. It was weirdly cathartic.

He’s in the shower now, humming the lyrics to one of the songs from Secretary Kim, a song called It’s You by Jeong Sewoon (thank you, Shazam), that makes every inch of your body overflow with adoration when he hits that long note. Anyway, you’re perusing the rest of the streaming service for a movie to watch. Jungkook said you couldn’t watch Train to Busan tonight, something about it ruining the mood. So now you’re debating between a historical romcom or a modern romcom.

Over the line, Namjoon is doing all the raging for you. “Men are trash,” he huffs one last time, before eventually letting it go. (For now.) “Hey, do you know how to cover up hickeys?” he asks suddenly, just as Jungkook reappears in the living room. His skin is glowing, looking like the hottest man alive. The window is still open, a feeble attempt to air out the smell of sex in the room, and the draft makes Jungkook shiver because his hair is still a little wet.

“Hickeys?” you repeat, stretching a hand out for him as he rounds the couch. Jungkook takes it, places a soft smooch against your knuckles, close to your promise ring. Your heartbeat stutters just as Namjoon hums.

“Yeah, this girl,” he says, cutting himself off with a laugh. One you recognize all too well because it’s the same one you let out when you talk about Jungkook to other people. Said boy settles close beside you, leans his cheek against your head when you snuggle into his neck. As soon as he’s there, you lose all rights to the remote, watching as Jungkook completely disregards all your searching just to click back onto Secretary Kim. He had missed a whole episode. “We went a little crazy tonight—“ you gag at the image Namjoon places in your head “—and Doyeon bites kinda hard—“

“Doyeon?” you interrupt, all mental processes coming to an abrupt halt as the name bounces around your mind. Jungkook, having mastered the art of listening in on your phone calls by now, freezes beside you. “You know a Doyeon?”

“Yeah!” Namjoon says excitedly as you sit up. Jungkook meets your gaze, big Bambi eyes giving the performance of a lifetime, and gives your this overly innocent shrug of his shoulders that tells you more about what he does know than what he doesn’t. “Kim Doyeon. She went to your school— actually, she graduated with you and Kook.”

The world comes to a complete stop as you glare at Jungkook, his panicked features cueing you in to the fact he was aware of this, as you’d suspected. “Namjoon,” you say slowly, fist tightening around Jungkook’s phone. “Are you aware you’re fucking my best friend?”

There’s a long silence on the other end, Namjoon presumably processing the information while Jungkook tries to calm the boiling anger within you. “He didn’t know,” Jungkook whispers, big pretty eyes on you as he tries to save Namjoon from you.

All his efforts are in vain when Namjoon clears his throat and so eloquently says, “and you’re fucking my best friend?”

epi-epilogue

The Best Buy employee doesn’t ask questions when you and Jungkook go in to get your cracked phone screens repaired. He does, however, give Jungkook an over-exuberant sales pitch on a brand new line of computer monitors that are almost as big as the television at your house.

You try to save him from the dangerous hands of capitalism, but the Hello Kitty bandaids decorating your neck are itchy, the skin still so tender, so sometimes it’s wiser to let him waste his money than argue otherwise.

“Good girl,” Jungkook says as he swings your arms back and forth on your walk to the car, impressed by the fact you didn’t argue with him in a Best Buy today. “My perceptions and understanding of you in my life make me happy,” he beams, too smiley as he unlocks the doors.

“Shut up,” you glare, painfully tearing the stupid bandaids off your neck as soon as you get in, brandishing the blossoming hickeys Jungkook had so graciously given you last night. At the sight, he bites down a smile. “You’re about to perceive and understand these fists.”

And Jungkook smiles— he always smiles —as he leans over the center console to press his mouth against the darkened skin at the front of your neck, mindlessly rubbing his thumb over your promise ring. “Perceive this love,” he says, so cheesy it makes you gag.

“Goddd,” you groan, pushing him away before he can see the smile on your face. “Someone get this man a Viki deal.”

#networkbangtan #bangtanhq #jungkook smut #jeon jungkook smut #jeon jungkook x reader #jungkook fic #jjk smut #jeon jungkook fic #jeon jungkook x reader smut #bts jungkook #bts fic #bts smut #mine

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x-childish-x · 3 years

Note

Hi there! I would like to see what James March would be like being stalker or jealous with the girl he likes 🥵🙏🏻😩

Dead Serious

Pairing: James Patrick March x fem!reader

Fandom: American Horror Story

Warnings: female!reader, stalker!James, creepy!James, creeper actions, sulking, jealousy, mentions to violence and murder

Word Count: 809

A/N: Enjoy the 400 follower spoil-fest!!!! Hello lovely! I kind of combined them both and twisted them a little. I hope you enjoy this and that it's what you wanted. Thank you so much for all the support and love! Enjoy! Feedback is always welcome and encouraged!

Summary: James can't help but shoot his shot after watching you from the shadows for weeks.

(gif not mine!)

You'd been sulking all night, sitting at the bar as you watched Donovan flit around the party. He stayed close to the Countess' side, kissing her more often than you wanted to see. Donovan had been the first to formally introduce himself to you, and try to make friends, but it didn't take long to realize he was off-limits.

James watched you from afar, as he had been since the beginning of your three-week stay at the Hotel Cortez. He'd been too afraid to reveal himself to you yet, but he'd banned all ghosts from touching you. More often than not, James found himself often contemplating the reality of killing Donovan each time he saw your puppy eyes following the immortal man. It made him sick and angry and, dare he say, upset. The uncertainty of his emotions was the exact reason that James had stuck to watching you like a stalker over the past two and a half weeks.

You ordered yet another drink from Liz, unknowingly impressing Mr. March with your alcohol tolerance. Grumbling under your breath at the sight of Donovan kissing the Countess yet again, your heart sunk deeper and deeper into your stomach. It was stupid to fuss over a taken man, but besides Liz, he'd been the only openly nice one to you.

James knew it was not only dumb but also dangerous to -stalk- admire a human woman such as yourself. Yet, he couldn't help it. Without revealing his form, James'd followed you everywhere and admiring every single thing you did. You were better than any drug he could've ever gotten, and seeing you watch the Countesses lover boy made him rage his jealousy. Every time your beautiful, sparkling eyes flicked to the immortal amateur, James had to stop himself from committing yet another murder.

"Why so glum, darling?" The thick accent of a handsome stranger washed over you as he sat next to you.

Slamming back the rest of your drink, you shamelessly looked the man up and down as you twirl your straw in between your perfectly painted nails, "I can't ever seem to find the right guy. They always end up kissing someone else."

James seethed with anger despite being impressed by your forwardness. Why wasn't he your type? He'd been watching you for weeks! He could tell you anything you asked! He could tell you about your favorite snack combination, or the way you always put your right sock on first, or the way your upper lip would twitch while you focused on work. It was true, this was the first time you were seeing him, so you could just barely be deciding if he was your type, but still, why didn't you want to kiss him?

"You can kiss me."

You laugh at James, your smile doing just enough to convince the man to not kill you for laughing at him.

"I wasn't joking," James speaks darkly, why don't you want to kiss him?

"Oh," Your smile slowly fades, as you notice that James was being dead serious, "Well, I never kiss a man without knowing his name first."

Of course, James already knew that. How could he not know that with how much he'd been watching you. He smiles dashingly, "The names March, James March."

"Well, Mr. March, it's a pleasure to meet you," You extend out your hand, "I'm (Y/n) (Y/l/n)."

Instead of shaking your hand, James brings it to his lips to press a gentle kiss to your fingers, "Tell me, darling. Am I the right guy? Cause I certainly won't kiss anyone else."

Your cheeks flare red, making James' smile widened. Your cheeks flare up the same way late at night when your hands sneak below the covers too-- "One kiss never hurt anyone, has it?"

James chuckles lightly, "No, it hasn't."

You both lean in, slightly too urgent for the kiss. Perhaps it's the lack of attention you've been receiving and James' excessive attention he's been dying to give from the shadows. Your lips lock in perfect sync, pulling soft whimpers from your perfect lips.

James pulls you onto his lap as his hands tangle in your hair. Your surroundings slowly fade as the only thing you can focus on is James. His lips on yours, his one hand in your hair and the other roaming your body. You're not sure where this man came from and how you didn't notice him before, but you're beyond glad he joined you at the bar. Something about his name rings a warning bell in the far back of your mind, but the taste of him in your mouth throws all caution to the wind.

If only you knew that you were kissing one of the most dangerous serial killers in the world. That James Patrick March was dead serious in more than one way.

General Taglist: @nowthisisdark @techssexythighs

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itsallyscorner · 3 years

Text

Bring Me Back

Pairing: Tom Holland x Reader

Summary: Filming “Cherry” had its ups and downs for Tom. When filming finally takes its toll on him, you’re there to instantly bring him back from the world of Cherry.

Warnings: Mentions of drug abuse, PTSD, murder. A smidge of smut.

A/n: In honor of the Cherry🍒 trailer dropping, I decided to write this!

(GIF creds: @atealiers )

Any kind of project was a blessing to Tom. He loved being an actor. He was fond of telling stories through the big screen and got a kick from portraying many different characters. Acting was something he felt passionate about, it was his craft and he was very dedicated when it came to becoming his roles. Cherry was quite different from the other movies he’s been in. It was dark and contained many subjects like drug addiction, PTSD, and crime. The world of Cherry was something Tom was not used to; it was twisted. He hasn’t been exposed to things like drugs or the events that Nico Walker had been through. Which was why he was hesitant to take on the role of Cherry.

When the Russo Brothers approached him with the idea, he was excited. He was getting the opportunity to tell another story and would explore the world of a new character. Though the more he looked into it, he realized that maybe he wasn’t up for the role. Was he really ready to dive into the dark and traumatizing life of Nico Walker? As an actor, he was willing to take the job, it would give him an opportunity to expand his career and would possibly be one of his best work. As Tom, he wasn’t sure if he could handle learning or re-enacting the events that occurred in Cherry. But Tom did like a challenge, which was why he ended up agreeing to become Cherry.

He prepared himself mentally and physically pre- production. For research, he interviewed army veterans and former drug addicts to get an idea of what it was like to be in those positions. To get the look of Cherry, he did a variety of things. For example, going on a diet and losing weight, then gaining said weight again once they had to shoot the army scenes. Another thing he did was shave off the gorgeous brown curls that adorned his head. At first you weren’t too happy with his change in hairstyle, but later on you found yourself running your hands along the short strands of hair, loving the fuzzy feeling it gave your palms.

After the interviews and hearing others’ experience, Tom felt a level of responsibility to tell the story of millions of people around the world. Not only was it telling the story of Nico, but of other army veterans who suffered from PTSD and people who’ve had drug addictions. He was fully on board now and there was no looking back. He was going to push himself to the limit and to places he’s never been before.

Filming was tough. There were scenes he had to do that were so unlike him, that felt wrong, and sometimes he just had to take a step back. They didn’t feel right, but it was nothing he couldn’t handle. This was his job, if he wanted this movie to be the best that it can, he was going to commit. Thankfully, he was working with the Russos, who he’s known for a while now. He was familiar with the two and they were patient with him, giving him the time to regain himself before shooting an intense scene. The cast and crew were very understanding as well, creating a safe space for him on set. Having Harry along with him helped as well, the familiarity of his brother kept him grounded and avoided him from falling into the void of Cherry. Though he had all these supportive people around him, there was only one person who could calm him down when things got suffocating on set. The only person he wanted to be in Cleveland with him but wasn’t. You. Since you had your own life and job, you were unable to fly out to Cleveland with him. Instead you stayed at your shared home with Tessa as company. All he needed was you when he felt the affects of Cherry caging in on him. Just the sound of your comforting voice over the phone could clear his head and make him breath again.

He had his bad days on set, where he would have to take a moment and hide in his trailer for a few minutes. During those few minutes he liked to be alone as he waited for you to answer your phone. The line would ring, it’d stop, then the sound of your sweet voice would be the only thing he’d hear. Sometimes you didn’t answer the first time, but nonetheless you answered eventually. It wasn’t the same as having you with him in person, you had your responsibilities, and he understood that. He just wished that one day you’d come to Cleveland. He wanted to be in your arms, stuff his face into your neck, breath in your familiar scent, he just wanted to feel you. You were his home. His safe haven. And it was all he wanted right now.

•

Glancing at your phone, you wondered why Tom hasn’t texted you yet. Not that you were itching for him to text you, but because around this time he would be blowing up your phone telling you things that happened during filming or how his day was going. You decided that filming probably went into overtime making him busy during his break. You shrug to yourself and continue working on your laptop.

You hear the sound of Tessa’s nails clicking against the floors as she enters the office of your home. You greet her with a smile as she settles herself beside your legs.

“Is it dinner time already, Tess?” You scratch her head as you glance at the time on your screen. It was currently nine at night, a bit late for dinner, but you haven’t noticed.

“Just give me five more minutes and I’ll get us dinner. How does that sound, love?” A somewhat sound of approval emits from Tessa. You get back to work, fingers typing away as you finish off the last of your work.

You finish in four minutes, finally satisfied with your work. You let out a content sigh and turn your laptop off. When you get up you stretch and let your bones crack after being in the same position for hours. Tessa joins you, stretching out her front paws then shaking her body out. You chuckle as you lead the way to the kitchen. Taking the scoop for Tessa’s kibble, you fill her bowl up, causing the dog to look up in curiosity. Once you placed the bowl down, her tail wagged wildly as she stuffed her face into her food.

You decided on going for something simple, ramen noodles. You were too tired too cook anything and ramen noodles were the quickest thing to cook in your pantry. While you waited for the noodles to heat up you checked your phone. You went through your notifications, but there were still no texts from Tom. Though you were concerned, you assumed that they had a long shooting day, making him too busy to text.

Hi love! I hope you’re doing well in Cleveland. I know you’re probably busy, but hopefully filming isn’t tiring you out too much. Have an amazing day! Don’t forget to drink some water from time to time and eat :) Tess and I miss you and love you so much! Talk soon xxx

You send the text with a smile. He won’t read it till he was free or done with filming, but you knew he’d see the message while you were asleep.

The microwave beeps, letting you know that your food was done. You end your night catching up on episodes of New Girl and eating soup. When you were done you did your nightly routine and settled in bed. You turn the lights off and snuggled under the warm sheets.

“Night Tessa.” You whisper to her. A huff comes out of her as she makes herself comfortable on the foot of your bed. When the both of you were settled, you slowly drifted off to sleep.

Buzz

The harsh vibrations of your phone shook you awake. Desperate for sleep, you blindly grab your phone and turn it off. Silence fills the room again as you turn around to stuff your face into Tom’s pillow. You were slowly drifting back to sleep when your phone began to vibrate again. With a groan you stretch back and snatch for phone off the night stand. You don’t bother looking at the caller id.

“Hello?” Your voice rasps out.

“Thank God you answered.” The person on the other line said. “I know you’re busy, but how soon can you visit Cleveland?” The deep voice was belonged to Harry.

“Uh—I’m not too sure, I’ll need to check in with my boss.” You reply. When you start feeling more awake you become curious as to why Harry can be calling you. “Why? Is everything ok? How’s Tom? I haven’t heard from him all day.”

The younger Holland sighs. He takes a moment to answer your questions making you suffer in silence, wondering what could have happened to your boyfriend. “Um, they’ve been shooting some intense scenes lately. Tom’s been trying his best but everyone’s noticed that he’s been a bit different.”

You sit up in bed feeling more awake. “What do you mean by different, Haz?”

“Well he’s snapped at the Russos quite a few times. There was this one scene, that they shot multiple times, and Tom would just break down after every one. (Y/n), I’m concerned for my brother, I don’t know what else to do. He’s locked himself in his room after every shoot. A—and I don’t know. I’ve tried to tell him that he can talk to me but he wouldn’t.” Harry explained, his voice croaked. You heart felt heavy for him. Harry was always there for his older brother, so to see him feel so helpless made you feel sorry.

“Haz, calm down, you know how your brother can get. How long has this been happening?”

Harry sniffed over the phone, “About a few weeks now. It’s only started becoming worse last week and now.”

The concern you felt for Tom grew. From what he’s been texting you, filming had been going great. He appeared happy on your FaceTime calls and sounded like his usual self. But maybe he actually wasn’t.

“Harry everything’s gonna be fine, alright?” You assure him. “I’ll call my boss first thing in the morning and when I get the ‘ok’ to leave I’ll get the first flight out to Cleveland. How’s that sound?”

“It sounds good. Can you tell me if you can make it? I’ll have someone come with me to pick you up at the airport.” His voice is quiet, almost muffled.

“Yeah I will, don’t worry.”

“Ok, thank you (y/n).” A small smile forms on your lips. You rub the sleep out your eyes as you glance at your closet. “Alright Haz, I’m gonna go now. But if there’s anything else, just text me or call.”

“I know, stay safe (y/n).” You bid him goodbye and place your phone on the empty space beside your side of the bed. Tom’s side of the bed. You bite your lip in thought as you worry about your boyfriend. You knew he was doing almost everything he can to make sure the movie came out perfect. If that meant shredding himself emotionally and physically, he was going to do it. Tom was dedicated to his work, but he’s never done anything close to Cherry, making you worried about the thoughts that could possibly be going through your lover’s head.

Tessa, who’s now woken up, waddles closer to you, sensing your uneasiness. You appreciate the dog’s gesture and pull her into your side, resting your chin on her head. You were basically sleepless the whole night. Although you haven’t emailed your boss yet, you already had a suitcase packed of your clothes. Your passport and other important belongings were already in a bag, ready to leave London.

The morning had been hectic. You’ve managed to get two hours of sleep, waking up at six in the morning. Still in bed, you sent your boss an email about a family emergency and how you needed to be out of the country for at least a week. As if the gods above knew of your situation, your boss willingly let you go, no questions asked and gave you well wishes. With that out the way, you scowered the Internet for flights to Cleveland. Luck was on your side that morning because you’ve booked a flight that took off in the afternoon. With your bags packed, you drove to Nikki and Dom’s to drop off Tessa.

Now all checked in, you were at Heathrow Airport waiting to be called for your flight. You were sat at your gate, with an iced coffee and a croissant from Starbucks, texting Harry. The two of you were discussing the time you’d arrive and how he’d pick you up. When you were both in agreement, you two decided to catch up. He had been in Tom’s trailer eating his breakfast. An hour passes and you were being called to board the plane.

You settle in your seat, but your leg bounced in anticipation. After the things Harry told you, you just wanted to have your boyfriend in your arms. You knew everything was probably getting to his head, all you wanted to do was hold him and tell him that he was going to be ok. As the plane began to take off, your lack of sleep caught up on you. Throughout the whole flight, you slept soundly, the worries of Tom subsiding for the time being.

~🛬~

The plane lands in Cleveland safely. It was night when you arrived. With your bags, you looked around the airport for a familiar curly haired boy. Harry waves wildly at you before running and pulling you into a tight hug. You laugh wrapping your arms around the slender boy.

“How’s your day been, Haz?” You ruffle his hair as he rolls your suitcase to the parking lot. He shrugs, “The usual. Was on set with Tom, ran around and got things for him, nothing much happened honestly. But you’re here now, so this is the highlight of my night.”

The two of you approach a black car with a driver inside, Harry motions for him to unlock the trunk. He lifts your case in before the two of you get into the backseat.

“How was your flight?” Harry asks you. The car began to move, exiting the airport and entering the highway.

“I slept through all of it, I don’t remember a thing about the flight besides getting on and off it.” You chuckle, leaning your head back against the headrest.

Harry nudges your shoulder, “Thanks for coming out with such short notice.” You wave him off. “It’s no worries, anything for my boys.”

The car is quiet, the only sounds that could be heard is the car’s wheels against the pavement. You turn to Harry, “How was he today?”

“He was pretty good in the morning.” Harry started. “Then filming started and he would grow frustrated after a few scenes. His temper’s been short. He snapped at me during lunch, which is normal, but I just asked him if he wanted some water. He broke down after a certain scene today, I tried talking to him but he still wouldn’t open up about it.” Tom wasn’t too open about his feelings sometimes. He struggled to voice them at times making all his frustrations and feelings bottled up in his head.

Half an hour later and you guys arrive at Tom’s rented home in Atlanta. As soon as you opened the door, you felt the heavy atmosphere. It was somber and tense, the chilliness of the weather also felt inside the house. Harry gestures up the stairs, “Don’t worry, go see him. His room is the first door on the left.”

You quietly thank him and climb up the stairs. You find his door, taking a deep breath before knocking. You hear some shuffling behind the door, “Harry I’m fine! Leave me alone!” His voice was deep, a bit scratchy. You frown at the door.

“Tom?” The room falls quiet. Suddenly you hear fumbling and the sound of heavy footsteps behind the door. The door opens and you finally see him. He was dressed in a large shirt with sweatpants. He looked tired, dark circles under his eyes, eyes glassy, and chapped lips.

“(Y/n)? You’re here?” He asks you in disbelief. A tight lipped grin forms on your lips.

“Yeah, Har—“ You were going to explain how you got there but he immediately threw himself at you. His arms wrap tightly around your figure, his head dipped into your neck, pulling your closer into him. One of your arms go around his neck while the other rubs his back soothingly. A whimper bubbles out of him, his shoulders beginning to shake. You managed to shuffle the both of you back into his room, closing the door behind you.

“You’re ok.” You whisper into his ear, pressing a kiss to the side of his neck. His grip around you never falters. Though he was much taller than you, he seemed so small at the moment. His body drowned in the shirt he wore, making him look thinner. You feel tears soaking into your shirt, making your heart clench in pain. You rest your forehead against his shoulder, holding and whispering sweet nothings into his ear until he was ready to speak.

A few minutes pass until his removes his head from your neck. You frown at his tear stained face, his eyes and cheeks red from quietly sobbing into your shoulder. Your hands cup his face, wiping the trails of tears on his cheeks. Tom leans closer to your touch, his eyes shut while his lips kiss your palm.

“I’m sorry, you’re probably tired from the flight.” He apologizes but you shake your head. You lead him to his bed and sit against the headboard. Tom follows in suit, desperately trying to get closer to you. His arms wrap around your torso, his head rests on your chest, while your legs tangle themselves together.

“I’ve had plenty of sleep on the flight, how are you?” Your lips are against his short hair from holding him so close. You nails scratch softly at his hair, calming him down.

“I don’t know if I could finish it.” He quietly admits. He shakes his head at himself.

“Why’s that, Tom?” Your boyfriend takes a deep breath as he sits up, removing himself from your touch. He sits across from you with legs crossed as he holds his head in his hands.

“I—I, it’s too much. There’s so much fucked up things he’s done. And all the things he’s seen. I just—sometimes I feel like it’s me who’s committed all of those things. When we shoot the scenes in the war and when I had to do drugs and rob banks, I felt like I lost myself—“ He cries interrupting himself to take a breath in. Compared to your fingers that ran gently through his hair, his clawed at his head. His palms rub harshly at his face, turning his skin a bright tint of red. To see Tom in such pain made you sad. You hated seeing him like this.

You gently remove his hands from scratching at his face and hold them in his lap. He stares down at your hands, clinging onto them as if his life depended on it. “I get lost in the character sometimes and I have to pull myself out of it to bring me back. But it keeps on happening over and over again. Then the Russos kept telling me to reshoot the scene more like Cherry, and I lost it and yelled at them.” You feel his tears fall to your your hands, making tears well up in your own eyes. You shuffle closer to him and kiss his forehead before pulling him into you. You stay quiet, letting him get whatever he wanted to get out.

Tom’s face is against your shoulder again. He sniffs before continuing, “It’s like everyday I find something he and I have in common. Then I think that maybe I’m turning into him. I don’t want him to be part of me. (Y/n), I don’t want to be him, I don’t want to do the things he’s done.” He sobs into your shoulder. Your heart breaks at how broken he sounded. His shoulders shook again, his back burning up with tension. A few tears made it’s way down your cheeks as you pulled his face away from you.

“Look at me.” You urged him. His jaw clenched, still looking down at his lap. He shook his head in response. “Tom, please. Look at me.” Your voice cracks. He slowly tilts his head up, your eyes connecting. He didn’t have that twinkle in his eyes, it’s like they’ve lost the light in them. Instead they were dark, like there was no life behind them. There was a mix of sadness, confusion, and even fear in his eyes.

You sadly smiled at him, cupping his face with your hands. “You’re not going to be him. You never will. You’re Tom. You are nothing close to Nico or Cherry. You are the sweetest man I have known in the world, you wouldn’t even hurt a damn fly. You’re not him. I know you aren’t. You wouldn’t do the things he’s ever done even if you were forced to. I know you Tom, I assure you, you’re nothing like him.” Tom hiccups, gripping onto your wrists.

“When this is all over and you’re done filming, we can forget about him. We won’t even mention him.” You assure him, stroking his cheeks.

“What if—,” You cut him off.

“No, there’s no what if’s. You’re going to be fine Tom. You’re surrounded by people who love you and will make you realize that you’re nothing even near him. You are the kindest man ever, you love your family, you care about your fans, and your brothers. You’re busy always taking care of everyone else, I think it’s time you take care of yourself, love.” You tell him. A small smile is on your face but it falters, “You don’t have to go through this alone, Tom.”

Tom takes a shaky breath in. “You’ll be there right?” He asks like a child making sure his mother will be there when he wakes up. “You’ll be there with me to bring me back?”

Your thumb smooths the crinkle between his brows, “I always will. I promise.” He nods and pulls you into him. You climb onto his lap and settle on his legs. He stares up at you, one of his his hands supporting your back, the other pressed against your cheek. “Thank you. I missed you so much. I’m sorry for not texting, everything’s just been so taxing mentally and physically.”

“No, don’t worry I get it.” You turn your face to press a light kiss on his palm. For the first time since you’ve seen him, Tom managed to crack a smile on his lips. He moves some strands of hair away from your face before resting his large hand on the back of your head. “I love you. I love you so much, (y/n).”

“I love you too, Tom.” You whisper against his lips. He takes that as a sign to finally crash your lips together. After months being apart, the feeling of his lips against yours felt like coming home. The kiss was desperate, like it was the air you both breathed. Tom had been longing for your touch, he craved you every second of the day, whether it be sexually or just missing you. The kiss grew rough, your teeth clashing, tongues poking and gliding against each other.

Tom lays you down on the bed, hovering over you. His hands grab and stroke at your body, trying to pull off your clothes to get close to your skin. He suddenly pulls away from your lips. “I need you. Please, I need you.” He almost begs you. Panting, you nod and push him to lay on his back. “Ok, let me take care of you, Tommy.”

He yanks his shirt off, throwing it to the side. You do the same, leaning down to meet his lips again. You kiss your way along his jaw and down to his neck. When you find that certain spot, he lets out a throaty groan, head falling back against the pillows. You run your nails along his chiseled abs and slightly roll your hips against his growing length. Tom grunts, hands instantly connecting to your ass and gripping onto your cheeks. He helps you roll your hips more, deeper with more friction against you two.

“Mm, Tom. I missed you.” You moan against his neck. You bite down and soothe the spot with your tongue after.

Tom looks down at you, lifting his hips to meet your clothes pussy. “Fucking miss you so much. You have no idea how much I’ve been dreaming of being buried in you again.” You kiss your way down his chest, but Tom stops you. His hands grab onto your leggings and slide them off.

“N-no foreplay. I need to feel you.” He stutters out, mouth agape. You nod in agreement and take his sweatpants off along with his boxers. You spit in your hand, running your hand along his dick to give it some wetness. Tom helps you lift yourself over him and guides your hips down his erected cock. You let out a combination of a sigh and moan as your walls envelop and stretch around him. Tom slightly sits up against the headboard, your tightness wrapping around him. He lets out a cry of relief, your walls around him feeding his cravings. You use his shoulders as leverage to pull yourself up but Tom stops you.

“What’s wrong?” You eye him cautiously. Tom shakes his head, “Nothing’s wrong. I just—can we stay like this for a while? I just want to feel you, please?”

“Yeah, we can do that.” You send him a reassuring smile as you settle back down on him. His hands make themselves comfortable around your waist. You maneuver your arms under his and wrap them around his back. Tom smiles at you, rubbing your back and guiding you into his chest. Before you can nuzzle your face into his neck, he presses a kiss to your temple and lets his fingers get tangled in your hair.

With his eyes closed in bliss, he whispers, “Thank you for bringing me back. I love you.”

You kiss his collarbone basking in the feeling him being so close to you. “I’ll always be here. I love you too.”

#marvel #mcu #avengers #Tom Holland #tom holland x reader #Tom Holland imagine #tom holland one shot #tom holland headcanon #Tom Holland smut #Cherry #tom holland fanfiction #tom holland drabble

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doctenwho · 3 years

Text

Gestures and Evasion

Hello! Welcome to a new DT fic! My deepest apologies that it’s been so long, and thank you so much for waiting so patiently! Life’s been a bit of a rollercoaster recently, and I’ve needed a bit to recuperate, but I’m back again!

This prompt didn’t have a specific character mentioned, but luckily, since it wasn’t anonymous, I was able to shoot pistachoz a DM and they’ve confirmed it’s a Tenth Doctor request! :D

Warning: None, I don’t think?

Word Count: 3,514

Summary: Check out the prompt above! :)

(Gif doesn’t belong to me, credit to the creator! :D)

The Doctor doesn’t really remember the first small act he’d committed to try and get his companion to notice him. To notice him on a... well, on a more personal level?

It’s a general memory, nothing pinpointed, but he knows it happened long ago.

It was something small—mundane. (Y/N) had more or less brushed the gesture off with a light laugh and a smile that made his hearts hammer away in his chest, but (Y/N) had really seen if for what it had been.

It wasn’t very often that the Doctor had these sort of feeling about anything, but there was just something special about (Y/N). Something he couldn’t put his finger on.

He’d been trying for just about as long as the companion had been travelling with him to send little messages, or gestures in hopes that maybe (Y/N) would see what he was doing for what it was instead of brushing it off like she tended to do.

If he’s honest, he’s never really had this kind of problem before. He’s had many companions, and more often than not, those companions tend to want more from him than he’s willing to allow himself to give. Rose, and Martha—Jack, even—they were all looking for more from him, and being what he is, and what he does, it’s not that simple to reciprocate feelings.

They’ll all age and eventually die, whereas he’ll just move on to his next bout of regeneration with a broken heart he’ll have to try his hardest to keep under wraps.

The Doctor knows that maybe (Y/N) showing such little interest in him is almost a good thing. Less heartbreak down the road when (Y/N) decides not to accompany him any longer, or, worse, when old age takes (Y/N) away like every other human before her. It’s inevitable, and he really should have a stronger hold on human life compared to TimeLord life, but the loss always knocks him down for a while.

It should be a good thing, but he just can’t seem to bring himself around to believing that it’s a good thing. Not when every time (Y/N) brushes off a gesture he’s thought over, and put time and effort into, it fills his hearts with an unfamiliar pain he hasn’t felt since losing his family and Gallifrey alike.

It had taken him a while to notice he was even trying to win (Y/N) in a sort of courtship way. And it had taken even longer to realize he’d been doing it for about as long as he’d known (Y/N). It hadn’t seemed like it at the time, but looking back now, he can see how all the little comments and gestures were more than just friendly.

But she’d been brushing his attempts off since early in their travels. Shooting him a smile, but turning away when anything too even the slightest romantic turn. Avoiding his eyes when he stared fondly, or laughing it off when a compliment slipped past his lips.

He really didn’t understand it.

He could see the Gallifreyan romantic gestures confusing (Y/N), but the few earth gestures he’d picked up barely stirred anymore of a reaction than the Gallifreyan ones. He didn’t know where he was going wrong—how it was all being perceived the way it was. The wrong way. He wasn’t getting the reactions he wanted and... well, it hurt.

Both his pride, and his hearts.

It had started small with flowers—or, a flower. They were on a foreign planet, but he knew giving small gifts like a flower was one of the human gestures. So, he’d searched around while his companion was busy exploring, and located the loveliest flower he could find. It was mixtures of blues and purples; native to the planet but incredibly rare considering they only bloomed twice a year, for no longer that three days at a time.

The flower had a sweet smell; one similar to those of sweets from earth. For a while, before he’d remembered Earth didn’t have this specific species of flower, nor were they advanced enough in space travel to find one, he’d assumed they’d used the attractive scent of the flower as a marketing technique to sell their sweets.

The sugary smell Earth sweets had would always come second to the scent of this specific flower.

The exchange had been short, and less than pleasurable if the Doctor’s honest. He’d found (Y/N) sitting on the ground, just taking the calming atmosphere of the planet. His heart stuttered in his chest before he finally took those last few steps towards her, where he settled at her side and cleared his throat to gain her attention.

He’d held the flower out, rambling out facts as (Y/N) took the flower into her hands. She gave it a sniff, and fiddled with the stem and petals for a second before smiling down at it. She stared down at it, before looking back at him with an appreciative smile. He’d thought he’d won her over, but instead, she settled the flower on the ground beside her.

His hearts had cracked as his companion’s hand fell away from the flower, leaving it on the ground as she returned her attention to the world around her. He’d swallowed thickly before sitting himself beside her, not bothering to mention the fact his gesture had gone unnoticed.

It was the same ordeal when he’d ordered (Y/N) a space delicacy from one of his favorite planets, where his companion had taken the treat into her hands and tasted it without a second thought. Smiling down at the treat, before shooting him light smile as she licked her lips.

He didn’t know why he’d been expecting—hoping for—anything more than the usual ‘Thank you’ he always received when he did something out of the ordinary for his companion, but the mumbled words had filled his with a sense of sadness.

It was silly.

But he kept trying.

The gestures just kept coming. It was barely a forethought anymore. An unconscious effort to try and win over his companion—seeking this relationship (Y/N) quite obviously didn’t want. It was a sad downward spiral, but he really couldn’t imagine not trying to woo her. He’d been at it for so long, not trying sounded foreign.

He tried just about anything he could to get any sort of reaction. Any hint that his companion knew what he was trying to do. Any acknowledgment that she understood that he was trying. He’d prefer blatant rejection to this... whatever this evasive attitude (Y/N) was expressing.

Dinner in the stars.

Unique gifts from distant planets.

Various treats and snacks from wherever they happened to be.

He even tried to learn more about human things on earth. How humans went about stuff like this, and how it all differed from his Gallifreyan roots. Human courting was quite the oddity.

He didn’t talk to many humans who weren’t his companions, or people he’d saved in some way or another, but the man who ran one of the shops had taken some time to educate him, but the Doctor had come out of that conversation more confused than he’d gone in.

But on the bright side, (Y/N) had enjoyed the bag of sweets he’d awkwardly bought to stand at the register and chat with the friendly shopkeeper.

He was still at a loss. Nothing seemed to be working. Nothing wooed his companion. He didn’t understand—couldn't see how not one single thing he’d tried had gotten (Y/N)’s attention.

But he still had one more thing up his sleeve.

“Where are we going?” (Y/N) asked cautiously from the seat in the console room. The Doctor was doing his usual laps around the TARDIS console to what should be six TimeLord’s jobs simultaneously. He’d gotten good at it over the years, but there was still, occasionally, some rough kickbacks when he couldn’t be everywhere at once.

“It’s a surprise,” the man shot his companion a grin, pulling a lever. At this point, (Y/N) should be used to the surprises. He never got the kinds of reactions he was looking for, but he was still hoping that... maybe sometime he would. That something he planned would be the special one that could win his companion over.

(Y/N) didn’t reply, but continued to watch the Doctor how around the TARDIS like a madman.

They weren’t far from the next greatest surprise the man had planned. They’d been travelling a little under an hour, and (Y/N) had only joined him in the console room ten-ish minutes prior, but he’d still refused to tell her where they were heading.

(Y/N) was still quiet when the Doctor stabilized his space and time machine, checking everything twice before finally tugging his companion up by the hand and leading her towards the doors.

He threw the doors open, grinning widely as he gazed around. Just as promised.

It was a phenomenon really. A collection of heart shaped carbon monoxide ice chunks. No one was quite sure how they’d been formed, or whether someone had carved the hearts and left them to float in this tiny orbital pull in the middle of nowhere.

It was a sight few saw—the Doctor had only heard of this place from chatter on a nearby planet, but he had to admit it was just as beautiful as he’d imagined. The ice glistened as the light casted from the TARDIS hit it, making them twinkle just as brightly as the stars in the background.

It was about as romantic as you could get.

“Woah,” (Y/N) gaped at his side, and the Doctor turned to look, smile slowly lighting up his face as he watched his companion’s eyes travel from heart to heart. “What... what is this?”

“It’s carbon monoxide ice,” the Doctor informed softly, the smile on his face widening as his hearts thrummed in his chest. His companion had an astonished look on her face, eyes wide with childlike curiosity. “Like that of Mars in your solar system. No one’s really sure how they take shape but... well, they’re quite the sight.”

“It’s beautiful,” (Y/N) breathed out, almost like her breath was taken away by the sight.

The Doctor had been told by many, had seen for himself as beauty takes away people’s breath. He’d been there too, once or twice with his current companion.

He barely even caught his words as they left his mouth—his heart speaking before his brain had a chance to filter his words, “Like you.”

That was his moment of error, the Doctor noticed.

He frowned to himself as his companion slowly pulled themself away, shying away from his side and retreating back into the TARDIS with one last lingering glance at the ice. The Doctor’s hearts froze within his chest, as he watched uncertainly—unsure just how he’d managed to mess this one up as well.

“It’s late,” (Y/N) muttered softly before leaving the Doctor alone in the TARDIS doorway, the man’s gaze locked on one lone heart with a barely noticeable crack down the center. It wouldn’t be long before the orbit around them pulled the frail pieces apart, severing the heart into two.

The TimeLord forced a breath, squeezing his eyes shut for just a moment as he resided completely with the cracked heart.

He didn’t understand.

The clumps of frozen carbon monoxide made his hearts hurt the longer he stared, so he was quick to follow on his companion’s footsteps, spinning on his heels and shuffling back inside, making sure to shut the doors behind him.

He wanted to flee this place, this failed attempt, but he couldn’t bring himself around to flying the TARDIS at the moment. He didn’t have the energy too. Like expected, (Y/N) had disappeared into the TARDIS, so the Doctor plopped heavily down on the seat.

Maybe it was time to accept the fact that his companion did not reciprocate his feelings. That he was barking up the wrong tree. He’d thought that they were... but maybe he was wrong.

The Doctor stared up at the TARDIS ceiling, his space and time machine giving a little hum as if she could feel his worries and mood. His hand patted the back of his seat halfheartedly as a promise that he was okay.

It had never been this hard with any other companion. There was just something so special about (Y/N). Something he wanted to get closer too, even though he knew he’d end up hurt in the end. Something he wasn’t sure he’d ever get now.

Maybe it was time to settle this once and for all. His gestures were overlooked, or, maybe even ignored. As much as it hurt to admit, (Y/N) didn’t seem very enthused with anything he’d done. Maybe it was the human not understanding what he was trying to do—but humans tended to like words.

The Doctor from (Y/N) in her room, perched on the edge of her bed. (Y/N)’s attention raised when the Doctor announced his arrival with a sturdy knock on the slivered-open door. The knock pushed the door in enough for the Doctor to poke his head in.

“Do you, uh, have a moment?” He asked cautiously, almost ready for the rejection he’d been living with for the better part of travelling with (Y/N). He’d grown used to it, but it still tugged at his heart strings. She’d never deny him conversation, but he could still see and feel her pulling away from him.

“Of course,” (Y/N) sat up a little more, giving the Doctor her full attention. “What’s the matter?”

He hadn’t thought this far ahead, the Doctor realizes as he shifts from foot to foot in (Y/N)’s doorway, mind vacant of any thoughts. (Y/N) tilted her head at the Doctor’s odd silence, studying him from her spot, “Doctor...? Are you okay?”

“Yes,” the man cleared his throat. Then did so a second time before continuing, “I wanted to, uhm, know what you thought about the, uh,” he gestured broadly behind him, hoping his companion could piece his question together.

“The ice hearts?”

It was a good thing his companion was so clever.

“Yes, the hearts.” The Doctor nods, fingers tapping awkwardly against his side. “Did you... did you like them?”

“They were beautiful,” (Y/N) repeated once again, fidgeting with her own fingers, “it was a bit unexpected, but... yeah, I did. Thanks for showing me them.”

The man gave a nod, but didn’t voice anything. If he thought his voice would’ve come out naturally instead of the anxious waver he was sure would be there, he definitely would’ve replied with a soft ‘My pleasure,’ because it really was his pleasure to introduce (Y/N) to the beauty of the galaxy.

There was an unsettling moment of silence where neither really knew what to say.

It was the Doctor who broke it, staring at his shoes as he finally allowed the words he’d been stewing over out, “do you... not like me, (Y/N)?”

“What?” the surprise was prominent. The word rang out for a second before the Doctor lifted his gaze to settled on (Y/N)’s shocked, tense frame. Her muscles were stiff, body sitting up straighter and more alert than she had been when he’d first asked to talk. “I like you plenty,” (Y/N) assured quickly, “what gave you the idea I didn’t?”

There was a list, really. He could count things off on his fingers, but he wasn't here to be petty. The man bit his lip, leaning against the doorframe to support his weight. He honestly just wanted to know why (Y/N) was so evasive every time he so much as tried to woo her.

“You... well, uh, you never seem to care,” he made sure to word it carefully, “I... I’m not sure if you even notice, or ignore it, or what. I just, I need you to be honest with me. Why haven’t you... reciprocated any feelings?”

“I’m not sure what you mean, Doctor,” (Y/N)’s eyebrows furrowed in confusion, and one ankle crossed over the other as she leaned forwards in interest.

“Since I met you,” the Doctor swallowed, “I’ve been... I don’t know how to say it but, trying to court you, I suppose? That’s not really something humans do, but it is something TimeLords do. It’s just that... every attempt I’ve made... every try I’ve made to do something cute, or romantic, you brush it off. You’re evasive, and... I’d just like to know if that’s because you don’t reciprocate my feelings. If you don’t feel the same, we can just put this all behind us.”

“It’s not like that,” (Y/N)’s voice was quiet, a near whisper, “please don’t think it’s because I don’t like you. I do, Doctor. I just... I wasn’t sure.”

“Weren’t sure?” The man furrowed his eyebrows, “sure about what?”

“I didn’t want to risk our friendship. I noticed everything, the flower you gave me, the sweets. All the dinners, and the... the dates. Today with the ice hearts even. I didn’t know how to admit I liked you when there was a chance you didn’t like me back the same way. I don’t know what I’d do if I ruined this.”

“But the gestures and dates?” the Doctor frowned, finally stepping into (Y/N)’s room and sitting on the edge of her bed beside her. He’d thought he was being obvious.

“Very obvious,” his companion let out a little laugh, “and I should’ve known, but I was scared. You’re the best thing that’s happened to me. This adventure is a once in a lifetime opportunity, and I didn’t want to compromise that by admitting my feelings.”

He could understand that, a bit. “So... you do like me too?”

“Of course,” (Y/N)’s smile was soft, “a lot, Doctor. I just... didn’t know how to reciprocate it without there being a possibility that everything could fall through, and we’d ruin our relationship in the process. I know you were offering it, but I was nervous. I’m sorry.”

“Don’t apologize,” the Doctor chastised quietly. He paused for a second before speaking again, “I’m having a hard time believing this is real,” he admitted with a tilt of his head, “you really acknowledged it all? I... never noticed.”

“Yeah,” (Y/N) smiled softly, “and I have proof it wasn’t all in vain, Doctor.” (Y/N) stood up from her spot on the bed, and moved towards her book shelf. It housed a few books, and some trinkets she’d found on their travels and liked. She continued speaking as she searched through the books, “I really enjoyed everything you put together for me since I met you. I wasn’t sure you were really doing it all to be romantic at first but... the hearts today really summed that up for me.”

The man watched as she tugged on one of the book’s spines, pulling it from the shelve and holding it in her hands for a second before she waving to retake her seat. She started flipping through the pages, so the Doctor leaned over her shoulder to watch.

“Here,” she stopped on a page towards the middle of the book. The Doctor refrained from gaping as his companion carefully pulled that singular flower he’d given her all that time ago from the book. The room was instantly filled with that sweet, alluring scent and his hand shook as he took the pressed flower into his fingers by the delicate stem.

“I thought you left this,” he admitted softly, studying the vibrant colours that had stayed even after being pressed into the book. He hadn’t noticed her bringing the flower back. Had really thought she’d left it on that planet and ignored the gesture entirely.

“I couldn’t,” his companion sighed, “it was selfish, even if I didn’t want to ruin what we had, I wanted to keep it to remember the moment. To remember you, even if we did at some point part ways.”

“You’re brilliant,” the Doctor breathed out, finally passing the flower back like it was as precious as a crown jewel or something. “So incredibly brilliant, (Y/N).”

(Y/N)’s cheeks flushed and she ducked her head away from his gaze, but it was different than the usual brushing away of his gestures. Something was different now.

They hadn’t cleared it all up, that was for sure. He still had questions, and she still had doubts. They didn’t quite understand each other yet, but it hadn’t all been in vain like he’d thought. She’d seen it all. Acknowledged it, even if not to him. His hearts swelled as he smiled lightly.

There was still a lot they needed to discuss, but for right now, the Doctor just wanted to spend a bit of time with his companion—without all the hassle of their rightful doubts and insecurities.

“Do you think we could... spend a little while longer looking out at the frozen carbon monoxide outside before we leave? It really is quite pretty, and... maybe we can talk about this more later?”

“I’d... love that, Doctor.”

“Good. Uh, great,” he cleared his throat, rubbing the back of his neck awkwardly. His companion giggled at him, but he didn’t mind in the slightest, “allons-y, (Y/N).”

<><><><>

Once again, sorry this took so long! I’m hoping to keep this momentum going and keep getting out the requests in waiting! I hope you all liked this fic, it was a bunch of fun to write! I thoroughly enjoyed creating the frozen carbon monoxide hearts, so I hope you all liked that as well!

As always, feel free to prompt me again if this wasn’t what you were looking for (though it might take a while to get around to it if you do!) and thanks once more for requesting. Hoping everyone had a good morning/day/night!

#Tenth Doctor #tenth doctor x reader #tenth doctor x you #ten #10th doctor #10th doctor x reader #10th doctor x you #10 #doctor who #doctor who 2005 #TARDIS #writing prompt #writing requests #reader insert #fanfiction #fanfic

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tender-rosiey · 3 years

Text

❥BSD responding to << I’d pick your thunder; I’d pick your rain over anyone’s sunshine any day>>

ᴀ/ɴ: apparently block limit is a thing in Tumblr so I had to put them under each other; sorry 😔 anyways I love you guys and I hope you have a wonderful day/night/afternoon/evening and please don’t be shy to request <3

Dᴀᴢᴀɪ ᴏsᴀᴍᴜ:

ఌ In the office, you hugged him from behind while he was reading a book

ఌ “Hello my belladonna, have you changed your mind about not letting me commit suicide-“

ఌ You bit him before he continued resulting in him to put and whine

ఌ “BELLADONNA HOW COULD YOU? HOW HEARTBREAKING MY DEAREST OF ALL HURTS ME WITH NO HESITATION”

ఌ “Shut up”

ఌ “How cruel! What would you do if I treated you like that?”

ఌ “i wouldn’t care because I’d pick your thunder; I’d pick your rain over anyone’s sunshine any day”

ఌ He was anything but collected when you told him that

ఌ He immediately stood up turning to you and hugging you tightly as he was holding back tears burying his face into your shoulder

ఌ “Thank you belladonna, but I promise to never show you my thunder or rain; you deserve sunshine and light.” He mumbled

ఌ The softest and most genuine smile on his face that you have ever seen and kisses you so tenderly as if you are glass

ఌ “I love you so much, my dear.”

ఌ Baby can’t believe that despite knowing his past and his dark side you would say that

ఌ He still didn’t let go off the hug

ఌ “Dazai, are you alright?”

ఌ “I am afraid that if I let go you would disappear and this will be all a dream.”

ఌ Literally couldn’t stop cuddling you all day on the ADA couch until Kunikida scolded him

ఌ “Kunikida just because you are jealous that my darling is so sweet and considerate doesn’t mean you get spoil my time with her >:\”

ఌ Breaking News: Dazai was later thrown out of a window by a man with glasses and blond hair

ᴀᴛsᴜsʜɪ Nᴀᴋᴀᴊɪᴍᴀ:

ᴥ︎ You have known bby since he was in the orphanage and even knew about his tiger form but didnt tell him about it scared of what they would’ve done to you

ᴥ︎ Time skip to when you guys got kicked out and join ADA

ᴥ︎ But before that you always witnessed when he turned into a tiger but he had never hurt you those times

ᴥ︎ When you did join you decided to tell him about that

ᴥ︎ “Why didn’t you run away?”

ᴥ︎ “What if I hurt you?”

ᴥ︎ “What if I even done worst that?”

ᴥ︎ “Why didn’t you just leave me?”

ᴥ︎ “Why didn’t you shield yourself somehwere?

ᴥ︎ “Why didn’t you hide?”

ᴥ︎ You smiled and kissed his cheek saying

ᴥ︎ “I’d pick your thunder; I’d pick your rain over anyone’s sunshine any day”

ᴥ︎ Dazai held in tears, right?

ᴥ︎ Atsushi just started crying while smiling

ᴥ︎ “That was one of the sweetest thing I have ever heard and been told but please Y/N take care of yourself a little more”

ᴥ︎ You calmed him down and kissed his tears away

ᴥ︎ “Sorry it’s just, I really can’t help it. You are so sweet and lovely. I seriously can’t believe I have someone as wonderful as you as my lover.”

ᴥ︎ Starts showering your faces with kisses

ᴥ︎ “Wanna go ride on my back to see the moonlight together? I wanna replace any fear of my tiger form with pure fascination.”

ᴥ︎ PICINIC DATE

ᴥ︎ You both are so cute lemme give y’all a hug 😔

ᴋᴜɴɪᴋɪᴅᴀ ᴅᴏᴘᴘᴏ:

(Slight Spoilers of BSD: Hitori Ayumu)

✍︎︎ After what happened Aya turned to you and asked “Y/N-san, why is it that you are with that old man?”

✍︎︎ Insert a barely holding his anger Kunikida

✍︎︎ You smiled and said “He isn’t that old and plus I’d pick his thunder; I’d pick his rain over anyone’s sunshine any day”

✍︎︎ The little girl seemed touched by the words as you continued

✍︎︎ “That is just a simple hint to how much I love him”

✍︎︎ His glasses fell off (that scored a date to the vision shop btw)

✍︎︎ Started crying like in that cute gif of him fanboying ☟︎

✍︎︎ “Y/N I PROMISE TO NEVER MAKE YOU WITNESS ANYTHING THAT WOULD HURT YOU OR UPSET YOU AND I WILL DEDICATE MY LIFE TO MAKING YOU TO THE HAPPIEST WOMAN ALIVE.“

✍︎︎ Instantaneously his eyes will soften then he will hold your hand delicately and speak

✍︎︎ “I swear on my ideals to always be by your side”

✍︎︎ Kissed your forehead connected it with his

✍︎︎ “And to fill your life with sunshine and to be the man you always dreamed of”

✍︎︎ Hit me right in my feels man

✍︎︎ “EW KUNIKIDA GET A ROOM” screamed the red haired girl

✍︎︎ Guys I heard something snap-

✍︎︎ “ITS KUNIKIDA-SAN TO YOU AYA”

Tᴀɴɪᴢᴀᴋɪ ᴊᴜɴɪᴄʜɪʀᴏ:

☃︎ You were sitting in the cafe with him and his sister

☃︎ Until she spoke up and said “Y/N how much do you love my dear big brother?” Smirking at the end of her sentence

☃︎ Junichiro started being flustered and waved his hand around “LOVEYOUDONTNEEDTOTELLUSIFYOUDONTFEELCOMFORTABLENAOMIWHYWOULDYOUDOTHISHERANDMEIAMSO-“

☃︎ “I’d pick his thunder; I’d pick his rain over anyone’s sunshine any day”

☃︎ Naomi recorded this in secret 🥰

☃︎ Bby smiled happy with a flustered face and cupped your face completely forgetting about his sister

☃︎ Your words hit him deep, damn y/n ( ͡° ͜ʖ ͡°)

☃︎ “That makes two of us then, babe.”

☃︎ He kissed your nose when he saw your confused look

☃︎ “Cause I would choose your thunder and rain over anyone else’s sunshine.”

☃︎ Hugged you and nuzzled his face into the crook of your neck

☃︎ “You are an angel sent from heaven y/n.”

☃︎ He is so fond of this moment

☃︎ Until Naomi coughed then ran away showing the video to the agency and he hid himself under a rock ever since

☃︎ Until you bribed him with kisses and cuddles that is

Rᴀɴᴘᴏ ᴇᴅᴏɢᴀᴡᴀ:

☕︎︎ You were chilling in the office with Ranpo

☕︎︎ Playing with his hat as he watched you while eating

☕︎︎ “My great detective~”

☕︎︎ “Yes my honey bunny?”

☕︎︎ “I’d pick your thunder; I’d pick your rain over anyone’s sunshine any day”

☕︎︎ His hair covered his yes for second as he was looking down

☕︎︎ “Y/N..” he mumbled before heading to you

☕︎︎ He then lifted up his head and smiled brightly as he hugged you

☕︎︎ “YOU MAKE ME SO HAPPY AHHHHHHHHHHHHHHH THAT WAS SO CUTE AND SWEET; EVEN I THE BEST DETECTIVE TO EXIST CANT MAKE UP SOMETHING SO HEART WARMING!”

☕︎︎ Kisses your cheeks while holding you close

☕︎︎ “I love you so much y/n 🥺”

☕︎︎ Picks you up and spins you around

☕︎︎ “I am sure you already know that though!”

☕︎︎ Y’all spent the day eating snacks and cuddling when you went home

☕︎︎ When you fell asleep he tucked you in bed and kissed your forehead opening his eyes

☕︎︎ The softest expression on his with full adoration on radiating from it

☕︎︎ “You also know that I would never show you my thunder and rain.” He whispered before leaving you to sleep

ɴᴀᴋᴀʜᴀʀᴀ ᴄʜᴜᴜʏᴀ:

*simping noises*

Anyways Chuuya for president

➪ You guys were cuddling and he was stroking your hair gently

➪ He placed a kiss on the top of your head

➪ “Chuu”

➪ “Yes dove?”

➪ “You know, I’d pick your thunder; I’d pick your rain over anyone’s sunshine any day”

➪ His hand stopped moving and you wondered why so you looked up

➪ Only to be met with the sight of Chuuya smiling with eyes with nothing short of adulation

➪ He kissed your nose and said “you know, you are sure way too cute you damn little thing.“

➪ He ruffled your hair causing you pout which he used it as an opportunity to peck your lips

➪ “So knowing that you have all my heart and love, what do you want to do for the day cutie?”

➪ When you entered your office the next day you found a bouquet of flowers and your favorite food on your desk with a letter that says

➪ “Dove you need to know, rain and thunder, storm and flood, snow and cold. None of these are things you deserve to go through or witness. You are an angel among others and deserve light, sunshine, warmth and happiness with the comforting of spring that’s all you deserve to see. - Your Boyfriend Chuuya”

ᴀᴋᴜᴛᴀɢᴀᴡᴀ ʀʏᴜᴜɴᴏsᴜᴋᴇ:

☾ One day he went on a rampage and unfortunately hurt you in the process

☾ Ever since then he started being distant afraid of hurting you if he loses his temper again

☾ Until one fateful day where you crossed paths, he turned away from you almost immediately until you shouted “WHY HAVE YOU BEEN AVOIDING ME?!”

☾ “WHY DID YOU STAY BY ME?” he retorted with tears streaming down his face with a face loaded with anger

☾ Shocked at his outburst you were silent

☾ “I TOLD YOU TO STAY AWAY WHEN I AM MAD?!”

☾ “WHY DID YOU STAY BY MY SIDE?! I ENDED UP HURTING YOU!”

☾ He looked at his hands guilt swimming through his iris of dark gray “What if you had died on my hand?..”

☾ He violently raised his head “I AM NOT ONE FOR EMOTIONS BUT DO YOU HAVE ANY DAMN IDEA HOW I FELT WHEN I SAW YOU HURT?! LET ALONE BY ME?”

☾ ��Y/N ITS FOR YOUR OWN SAKE STAY AWAY FROM ME; I AM AT THE END OF IT ALL A MURDEROUS MONSTE-“ you silenced him with your lips

☾ When you pulled back, you wiped his tears and said softly “I’d pick your thunder; I’d pick your rain over anyone’s sunshine any day”

☾ Pulled you into a hug and buried his face in your shoulder

☾ “Idiot...”

☾ You guys kept hugging until baby was assured that you are okay aw

——————————————————————————

do not copy or plagiarize or you will be reported

436 notes · View notes

onionsaremeansstuff · 3 years

Note

Can I request a Dean fanfic? Where he and the reader broke up and the reader finds out he’s pregnant with Deans baby (yes mpreg) and a few months later Dean finds out and tries to get back together with him. The reader didn’t want to be around Dean and advoided him as much as possible but Dean is determined to prove that he is fully committed to him and their baby and won’t stop until the reader and his child are his

after weeks, i wrote it! (sorry, for the 3th time)

sorry for the implicit Cas x reader, i wrote it and just noticed it later.

anyway hope u like it!

Pairing: Dean x reader

Gender: Male

Warnings: Yandere behavior, MPreg

Summary: Dean discovered that he have a son and he will do whatever it takes to get his child and you

I dont own the character or the gif

You were walking towards the motel room door. The rain mixed with your tears as it soaked you and your backpack.

Frustration, sadness, and anger formed in your heart as you remembered what had happened a few hours ago.

How Dean had broken your heart and ruined your relationship as if your relationship was nothing to him at all.

Upon entering the motel room, you sat in front of the door, your hands on your face as you cried and thought about what you were going to do now.

What you were going to do without Dean, without your home, and without your friends.

You didn't feel that your future would be a promising one.

Weeks had gone by since you had left.

Right now, your life mainly consisted of going out to buy something to eat, head back to your motel room and watch some cliche movie.

Until one day, you woke up feeling sick to your stomach.

'It must be the crap I ate for lunch or my body just decided to punish me for just crying.' You thought, as you vomited in the bathroom toilet.

Unfortunately, this was a repeated cycle for you every day. Waking up in the morning and throwing up in the toilet.

You even thought about eating healthier food, but it didn't help the vomiting problem.

That's when you decided to call Castiel.

You knew that you shouldn't be calling him since you were probably just sick which is something that everything human goes through, but you couldn't take it any longer.

When you heard the sound of wings fluttering, you felt the angel wrap his arms around your body.

"Y/N, have you been staying here all this time? You were gone for weeks and I was worried sick about you! Every time I asked Dean where you were, he ignored me and left the room." The angel said, tightening his arms around you. He pulled back from the hug to look you in the eyes, "Why did you disappear like that?" He asked, tilting his head to the side.

You looked down at the floor and let out a sigh, "It's complicated, Cas but I need your help."

"With what?"

Lately, I've been feeling sick. Every day I wake up and I've tried everything to stop the sickness, but it won't go away. So, could you maybe, cure me?"

Castiel nodded, and put two fingers against your forehead.

"What the-" Castiel muttered after removing his fingers from your forehead. You were confused by the angel's reaction. He lifted your shirt up slightly and put his hand on your belly, rubbing his hand over it.

"What are you doing, Cas?" You asked, feeling the angel's warm hand against your stomach.

"This makes no sense," He spoke in confusion as he removed his hand "This shouldn't even have been possible."

You were starting to get a little scared, "Cas, what's going on?"

"Y/N... there's a baby inside you."

You let out a laugh and punched his arm lightly, "Oh my God, Cas. You actually scared me for a second. Who taught you how to make jokes?"

This is too funny. A baby inside you? A guy? Yeah, right.

"I'm not joking around, Y/N. There's a fetus inside you."

"But, that's impossible, Cas. I don't have a uterus." You pointed out.

"There is a baby inside your stomach. I felt a baby's presence when I was healing you." Castiel sat on the bed and mumbled words under his breath before disappearing and reappearing a few seconds later with a red-haired woman you recognized all too well.

Rowena.

"What's going on here? And why did you bring me to this hotel room, angel?" The witch asked.

"We need your help." The angel said.

"Cas, what are you doing?" You asked him.

"Rowena, Y/N is pregnant and we don't know how it happened. Would you be able to find out?" The angel questioned.

"You could have just asked me for help instead of kidnapped me, angel." Rowena said, approaching you, "But, let's see what happened, shall we?"

Rowena started to speak words in a language you didn't understand while touching your stomach, "Ah, did you face a witch recently?"

"Yes, about three weeks ago."

"Did she have a red book with a fish and goat drawn on it?"

"Yes." You answered.

"I already know what happened!" The witch exclaimed, "That book is from an ancient coven that was very pure and strong, but extremely sexist. They did not accept women there." She sat down by your side, "To continue the purity of the coven they created spells to allow male pregnancy, thus maintaining the male-only lineage." She explained.

"Okay, the story is cool and all, but what would that bitch gain from making me pregnant?"

"Spells can be completely different and just have the intonation of a different letter, dear. Maybe she tried some other spell but ended up doing this one in particular accidentally."

"And how can we get rid of it?" The angel butted in, wanting to help.

"You can't. Trying to end the pregnancy would cause Y/N to immediately die."

"Great. Just fucking great. I'm alone, emotionally unstable and pregnant. Oh, this is just fucking great!" You said sarcastically, throwing yourself on the bed.

"I imagine that you would want to tell Dean the good news."

"What does Dean have to do with this? And besides, we're not together anymore." You replied, sitting up and looking up at Rowena.

"Ah, pity my dear. The spell allows you to become pregnant, but It still needs insemination, meaning the child is Dean's."

"Just great."

"Y/N," Castiel approached you, "I know you are scared and worried, but I will be by your side and will always accompany you at all times. If you want my help, of course." The angel offered, a hopeful look on his face.

You looked at the angel and the hopeful look on his face made you feel like everything was going to be okay.

"Thanks Cas. I really appreciate it."

---

During the following months of your pregnancy, Castiel remained by your side. Taking care of you and bringing what you needed.

Even bought books on pregnancy and learning how to take care of the child.

Rowena came by every month to check on you and the baby. You weren't close, but she knew what a pregnancy was like and wanted to help you, and she also wanted to know how the pregnancy spell worked, but you ignored the fact that you were her little lab rat.

When the time came, Rowena prepared the spell to take the child out of you. Fortunately everything was painless and soon the baby was sleeping in your arms.

"I'm glad everything went well," Castiel said, sitting next to you, "Have you decided on what to name him?"

You looked at Cas in confusion before it dawned on you. You had completely forgotten to think of a name for the child.

"He's a little angel." You commented, "Nothing is more fair than receiving the name of one, too. Castiel, meet Castiel Junior." You smiled at him

"M-My name? Why?" Castiel asked, fumbling over his words slightly in surprise.

"You helped me with everything, Cas. If it weren't for you nothing would have worked out the way it did, so I wanted to name him in honor of you. The super protective angel."

"Thank you so much, Y/N. I'm very honored, and I promise to always look after you both." Castiel kissed your forehead before getting up and fetching a bottle for little Castiel.

---

Five years have passed since the birth of Castiel, or Castie which is what you called him. You moved to a small town and started a new life with your child, away from hunting and monsters.

Castiel still visits you both regularly at least four times a week, honoring his promise to take care of you both and honestly, you're happy that he did. Looking after a child alone is really difficult.

It's been years since you had contact or heard from the Winchesters. Castiel just gives you news about Sam who you miss a lot.

Everything was peaceful and you were finally happy. True happiness.

---

"Are you sure this is going to be a case, Dean?" The angel questioned, "This city doesn't seem to be dangerous. Maybe we should go back."

"What's your problem with coming here, Cas?" The younger brother asked, "Ever since we told you the case was in this town you have been complaining."

"It's nothing, I just don't think there's a case he-" Castiel couldn't even finish speaking because something or someone hugged him.

"Papa Castiel!" The child said, "I missed you! Daddy won't let me eat chocolate anymore!"

Cas turned and saw Castie there. He smiled and picked up the child.

"Hello little me. I missed you too. Where's your daddy?" He asked as the child hugged him, and the brothers looked confused.

"Castiel, what the fu-" Before Dean could finish his sentence, Sam put his hand over his mouth and looked at him with a disapproving look.

"Castie! Where did you go?" The three heard a voice that sounded familiar.

"Daddy I'm here. Papa is here too!" The child yelled back, letting his dad know where he was.

You recognized Castiel's coat and soon calmed down before you saw that Dean and Sam were there, too. A lump formed in your throat as you approached them.

"Hello Y/N." Castiel and Sam greeted simultaneously as Dean just stared at you.

"Where have you been all this time, Y/N?" Sam asked and you could see that hurt look in his eyes.

"I'm sorry I haven't talked to you in the last few years, Sam. I've been a little busy as you can see." You gestured to your son and picked him up.

"Yeah. I can see that, but a text message wouldn't kill, you know?" He suggested, and you gave him an apologetic look.

"That's very true. I'll remember that next time, but I'll be taking my leave now. I don't want to disturb you or anything-"

"You are friends of papa and daddy! Come to our house! I have several toys!" He exclaimed excitedly.

"Castie, they are busy now." You said.

"Oh, we're not busy right now. And a place to stay would be great." Dean spoke up for the first time since being there.

"Yay! Come on daddy, they want to see my toys!" He spoke excitedly and you found yourself giving a defeated nod. You knew that something was about to go down and you we're not prepared for it.

You each went to your cars and went to your home.

---

Dean wasn't stupid.

You left him five years ago and now you show up with a 5 year old child who has the same eye color and freckles just like him.

He didn't know how it happened, but he knew the child was his.

And knowing that you hid it from him made him more angry then he cared to admit.

---

You were at your house, Castiel and Sam we're playing with your kid while you made coffee with Dean watching you.

"Papa, can you please get me my puzzle so I can play with the giant!" Castie asked, and you smiled at Sam's bitchface.

You went to Castie's room and were looking for the puzzle when you heard the bedroom door close and turned around to see Dean standing before you.

"Are you psychotic or something? How did you do that?" He pushed you up against the wall with his hand around your throat, "Is he a clone of mine or what?"

His large hand tightened around your throat, "What are you talking about, Dean?"

"The child. He's a copy of me. Did you do any sick spells to copy me?" He questioned, anger getting stronger and stronger.

The tightness in your throat made it difficult to even answer the question.

"Dean let him go, NOW!" Castiel's deep voice came out of nowhere and pushed Dean off you, "The child was the result of a spell, but not done by Y/N himself. He was a victim of the spell." The angel explained and Dean gestured for him to keep going.

Honestly, you would have rather let Dean continue to hate you than know the truth.

"Five years ago, Y/N was hit by a witches spell. The spell was supposed to kill him, but she mispronounced it and ended up casting an old spell that allowed male pregnancy. That's what happened. It wasn't his fault." The angel explained.

Dean looked back and forth between you and Castiel and you could see pain, hatred, and sadness in his eyes.

"Leave the room, Cas. I want to talk to Y/N alone." The hunter ordered and started pushing the angel out, or at least tried to.

"I'm not going anywhere!" Cas stated firmly.

"You can go, Cas. If anything happens, I know that you're only one prayer away."

The angel looked at you hesitantly before nodding and leaving the room.

Dean closed the door and looked at you.

"We have a son and you never even thought of telling me. The child's father?!" He yelled at the top of his lungs angrily at you for not even bothering to tell him that he has a kid.

You sighed, "Look, I didn't want to see you after what happened. I was already confused and stressed out about having a damn baby inside me." You sighed again, "I really don't want you here."

He was so angry that he punched the wall and you flinched slightly, "Dammit, Y/N. He's my son for crying out loud!"

"Oh, please. Your son my ass." You scoffed bitterly, "I raised him for the past 5 years with Castiel. If he's anyone's son, it's Cas's son."

"No, Dean," You denied, "You were the one who made me leave you, or don't you remember what you said that night." You stalked forward towards Dean who stood right there in his spot, "Oh Sam, Y/N is just a temporary thing. A way to get free and easy sex. He is not who I want in my future. He is only there until I find someone I really love." You imitated his speech from that night before walking away and sitting on the bed as Dean stayed silent.

He rolled his eyes and let out a bitter laugh, "So this is it? You and Castiel? Did you leave me to be him?" That sentence through you for a loop and that made anger that you have been trying to hold in resurface

"I'm just doing what I always wanted. I got out of the hunting life and your life, and I didn't want to add a baby on top of your plate." You got up and went to the shelf, picked up the puzzle for Castie, "You can go ahead and fuck some girl in a bar, marry her and have a perfect family." You opened the door and left the room wth Dean staring at the ground in regret.

---

The rest of the day you and didn't speak to each other. He looked at you with a sad expression on his features, but you focused your attention on Sam and your son.

Cas told Sam everything that had happened in the past 5 years and he offered help if you wanted it.

Obviously, you accepted his offer and said that he could visit his nephew whenever he wanted.

You offered them the guest room and sofa for them to sleep on. As much as you didn't want to see Dean, you wanted to be able to get your relationship back with Sam.

---

The brothers solved the case in 3 days. They said goodbye and soon left after that.

During their stay, Dean was restless and always seemed to be thinking about something, but you chose to ignore it and just pretend that the conversation between you two never happened.

---

Days have gone after the Winchesters hunt. Your boss for some reason asked you to leave for a few days. They would be disinfecting the building and you weren't complaining. After all, you could have more time with your son.

Castie had been a little weird in the last few days. He was more reserved and closed off a little. You saw him laughing now and then along with talking to himself, but when you asked him he said his only reply was that it was a secret. You just assumed it was something little children went through, but with your former life, who knows.

You were in the kitchen, baking a pie.

Castie, unfortunately was just like his dad when it came to favorite foods. You just put the pie in the oven when you smelt something strange and vaguely familiar.

Freakin' sulfur.

You ran into Castie room where you saw the door was strangely closed and locked. You kicked open the door.

You ran inside and saw a woman with Castiel on her lap.

"The young child has Winchester blood inside him. He could be very useful." She turned to face you with her black eyes.

"Whoa! Whoa! Whoa! Just leave him alone, please." You pleaded.

Castiel seemed to be sleeping on her lap while she pointed a knife at his throat.

"Why should I? Winchester no-" A demon killing bullet went straight through her head before she could finish.

"Y/N!" A deep voice called out to you, but you ignored it and ran to your soon and was glad to see that he was okay.

"Y/N is everything okay?" You heard Dean ask and you nodded

"Shit, that was too close." He exclaimed.

"This is a perfect example of why I didn't want you to get too close to him. Now, he is a target. Demons and other monsters will be targeting him." You sighed.

"Y/N," Dean started, "I know this life is dangerous with everything that comes with being a hunter, but you'd be safer with me." He said and you rolled your eyes, "The bunker is the safest place on earth and-"

"I'm not going to raise my son with any connection to the supernatural world, Dean!" You exclaimed as Castie started to wake up.

"Daddy? What happened?" He asked, turning to face Dean, "Father? You came back!" He ran out of your arms and went straight to Dean's.

"Father?" You questioned.

Dean looked down at the ground as he ran his fingers through his son's hair, "I told him."

You looked at him as if you wanted to kill him, and you kinda wanted to.

In addition to putting your child's life at risk, he made his way back into your life.

"He needed to know Y/N." Dean tried to reason in with you.

"Daddy, father. You'll be together with me now, right?" He looked at you with puppy eyes

"Castie your dad and I have problems and I don't think it would be good for"

"We have problems that need to be worked out. Problems that I will overcome and I will not commit again." Dean spoke proudly, as he took Castie into his arms.

"Can we please daddy! Father told me that he lives in a fortress! It must be much nicer than our house! There must be lots of toys there!" Castie said excitedly and you wondered what toys could possibly be in a bunker.

Trying to hide things from Castie didn't work out anymore. The supernatural world wants his head on a silver platter now and you didn't know if you would be able to protect him by yourself now.

You really didn't want to go back with Dean, but the bunker is a safe place and you would do anything to keep your son safe.

You sighed, "Okay, we're going with him, Castie. Go get your things while I talk to your father, okay?"

“Okie dokie! "He happily picked up his toys as you and Dean made your way out of his room and into your room.

"Just so we're perfectly clear, I'm doing this for him. Do you understand? I don't want us to go back to being how we used to be. Let alone stay in the same room as you. Got that?"

"If that's what you want, Y/N. But, I changed, okay? I have been miserable without you. You are the light of my life, and I didn't want to admit it and pretended that you weren't important but, without you all I did was drink and-"

"You used to do that all the time when we were in a relationship together. Seems that you haven't changed as much as you thought you did." You interrupted him, leaving the room to go help your son pack.

Dean knew it wasn't going to be easy to get you back or even to trust you again. He expected it to be difficult. But, he would get there and he would win you back and would raise his son together with you.

He had no limits when it came to getting you and son to move into the bunker to be near him and to get you back into his arms.

Hell, he already hired a demon to almost kill his own son just to scare you.

But, he didn't die and now you, and Castie are safe and would be living with him.

The only thing he had to do now was get rid of that damn angel and he could finally have the perfect family he always wanted.

#dean winchester x male!reader #dean winchester x male reader #dean winchester x reader #supernatural x reader #supernatural x male reader #male reader #x male reader

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americasass91 · 3 years

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Truth or Dare?

Here is the original request:

Well Hello! I know I haven’t posted anything in a hot minute. Stupid fucking Covid got in the way. But I’m fully recovered and back to normal! Well as normal as I can be for me 😋. Anyways i’m back with a request from @shythingstudentdragon! I hope you like it! And thank you for letting me tweak the request just a little! I also used some prompts so this fit into the Happy Hoelidays Challenge! Sorry this is such a late entry but I’m glad I was able to get one out! Thank you for hosting this lovely challenge @stargazingfangirl18 @navybrat817 and @donutloverxo! I had a lot of fun with it!

This is a Steve Rogers AU. I hope you enjoy!

Dialogue Prompts:

“I know a good way to warm you up.”

Gif Prompt Used: Steve Rogers

Rating: Explicit (I mean really, all of mine are usually this rating. I can’t seem to help myself😏)

Words: 4.3k

Warnings: Language, Oral(F Receiving), unprotected sex(You can’t go wrong, if you shield your dong), Steve being Steve (I think this is a valid warning), And if i forgot anything I apologize

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God you hated men.

Your ex decided to cheat on you with the school slut. You broke up with him as soon as you found out and he had the audacity to act all bent out of shape about it. What the fuck did he expect?

You’re not even entirely sure why he slept with someone else. You guys had plenty of sex. Not good sex, but still.

The sad thing was is you’re only 18 but you were considering swearing off men.

“Pssst. Come on baby, talk to me.” Your ex was currently trying to get your attention in class. You were doing your best to ignore him and just copy the notes from the board.

“Shut up, Justin. I don’t want to hear it.” You whispered back while glancing at the teacher. You really didn’t want to get in trouble.

“But I want you back. That girl didn’t mean anything.”

You decided to not even dignify that with a response and continue to copy the board.

“Please Y/N. I just need one more chance, you’ll see. I’ve changed!”

“Shhh.” You hear from the front of the class. It came from the Teacher’s Assistant, Steve.

You glare back at Justin.

The glare must not have any effect because he continues to pester you.

After about the fifth plea of taking him back, you lose it.

“WILL YOU SHUT THE FUCK UP?”

You instantly slap your hands over your mouth. You hadn’t meant to scream that out loud.

“Miss Y/L/N!! There will be no tolerance for that kind of outburst and language in my classroom! Detention after school!!”

Your jaw drops. “But that’s not fair! He wouldn’t leave me alone.” You point back at Justin.

“Well the only voice I heard was yours. I’ll see you after school.”

Mr. Smith comes over and hands you the dreaded pink slip. The bell rings indicating class is over. You gather your things and hightail it the hell out of there, needing to get away from Justin as soon as possible.

That motherfucker caused you to get detention. And on today of all days! You were going to go Christmas shopping with your girls. Well not now.

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After your last class of the day you find your friends to let them know you have detention and aren’t able to join them.

“Awe that totally sucks! How on earth did you get detention?” Your best friend asks.

You quickly tell them what happened. They all agree you’re going to have to get Justin back somehow.

You give them a sad wave and head back towards your 3rd period class to get this torture over with.

When you walk in you look around for Mr. Smith and are pleasantly surprised to see his Teaching Assistant instead sitting at his desk.

You plop yourself down in one of the desks in the middle row. “Where’s Mr. Smith?”

Steve looks up from the tests he’s grading. “He said he had a prior commitment and asked if I minded sitting with you.”

You roll your eyes. “You must have something better to do than hang out in detention.”

He gives you a smirk. “I don’t believe I’m the one in detention, Miss Y/L/N.”

You feel a shiver run down your spine at his smirk. “Yeah, well. It’s not exactly my fault that I’m here.”

He nods. “I know. I noticed Justin wouldn’t leave you alone. I tried to explain that to Mr. Smith after class. But you know how he is. Plus you shouted a curse word out loud.”

You grimace. “Yeah, not one of my finer moments. So how does this work? Do I have to sit here and be quiet for an hour or am I allowed to talk?”

Steve leans back in his chair and crosses his arms. Jesus. How had you never noticed how built he was before?

“Well normally I ask the student to sit there quietly but since I don’t really think you’re at fault, I don’t mind if you talk. What would you like to talk about?”

You shrug your shoulders. “Well, I don’t know a lot about you. How about we play Truth or Dare. That always brings out people’s true selves.”

There’s that smirk again. “Alright. You start.”

“Okay, Truth or Dare?”

“I’m just warning you, I don’t do a lot of Dares. So I’m going with Truth.”

“Fine with me. We’ll start easy. How old are you?”

He cocks his head to the side. “Almost 21. Truth or Dare?”

You cross your legs and can’t help but notice his gaze follows your movement. “Truth.”

“How old are you?”

You smirk. “18. I started Kindergarten late. Truth or Dare?”

“Truth.”

“So what are you going to school for?”

“I want to be a history teacher. That’s why I’m Mr. Smith’s assistant.”

You nod your head. “Makes sense. And I know you didn’t ask me but, Truth.”

He looks up towards the ceiling for a moment, thinking about what he wants to ask you. “So why was that guy bothering you in class?”

You can’t help the roll of your eyes. “He’s my ex and he wants me back. And I could care less.”

“Why’d you guys break up?”

“He decided to fuck somebody else and I don’t put up with that shit. I know I deserve better than that. So I’ve sworn off men.”

He furrows his brows. “I mean that totally sucks he cheated on you. And in my opinion he’s an idiot. But you’re really swearing off men? All men? We’re not all bad you know.”

“I didn’t say all men were bad. I’m just done with them for now. Gonna take some time for myself. Enjoy me.”

Steve’s thoughts immediately go down the drain at your last statement. He can feel his cheeks turning red as well as his pants getting tighter. He clears his throat. “Well, that’s always good to do. Time for yourself is important.”

“Yeah it is. And I believe it’s my turn. Truth or Dare?”

“Truth, please.”

You decide you want to watch him squirm. “I can’t help but notice you have a nice body. Do all the girls at college try to get a piece of you?”

Now Steve definitely knows his cheeks are red. “Um, no. I can’t say that they do. I mean, I’ve had a few interested but not a lot.”

You find that hard to believe. He’s fucking gorgeous and currently ruining your panties with every smirk of his. “Now, I don’t believe that for a second. I mean, you’re very good looking Steven. If I went to your college, I’d definitely hit on you.”

Now Steve was definitely having inappropriate thoughts. He knew he shouldn’t. You were still in high school. Although you are 18. “Well, thank you. I guess the right girl hasn’t been interested. I’m looking for a connection I guess. I want more than just sex.”

That actually surprised you. Usually sexy guys like Steve are only looking for one thing. “Yeah, a connection would be nice I suppose. Although you have to admit, sometimes just sex can be nice too.”

Steve clears his throat and looks towards the windows at the snow falling outside. “Uh, I think it’s my turn now. Truth or Dare?”

You can’t help but notice he ignored what you said about sex. “Truth.”

Steve decides to give you a little taste of your own medicine. “What’s the best sex you’ve ever had?”

Now it’s your turn to be embarrassed. “I don’t think that’s happened yet. Cause if it has, I’m thoroughly disappointed. Truth or Dare?”

“You know what? I think I’m going to go with Dare this time.”

You get excited at the idea. “Well, Steven. You look like a nice strong guy. So…” You look around the room…“I Dare you to pick up one of the desks over your head.”

Steve scoffs at you. “At least give me a challenge, Y/N.”

He stands up and picks up the middle desk in the front row and lifts it over his head as if it weighs nothing. Welp, you’re definitely wet now. Jesus. Those fucking arms of his. The veins were really prominent now. You knew he knew you were checking him out and fuck it if you cared. He sets the desk back down and sits in the desk in front of you sideways so that he can still look at you.

“Wow, I have to say that I’m impressed.”

He smirks at you. “Yeah? That was nothing. But hey, it’s my turn now. Truth or Dare?”

You almost pick Dare to see what he’d choose but you chicken out at the last minute. “I’m gonna have to go with Truth again.”

He turns his gaze towards the window again trying to think of what to ask you. Then he smirks and moves his eyes back to you. “Was that ex of yours any good in bed?”

You don’t even have to think about this answer. “Ha, no. I mean, it wasn’t the worst I’ve had. But definitely not that great. Let’s just call him a 2 pump chump and leave it at that.”

“Ouch. Can’t say I’m surprised though.”

“Are you a 2 pump chump, Steven?”

Steve just smirks at you. “I believe you’re supposed to ask me Truth or Dare?”

You smirk back at him. “Okay. Truth or Dare, handsome?”

“I think I’m going to go with Dare again.”

You think for a second before a naughty thought pops into your head. You stand up and move so that you’re standing in front of him. You put your hands on your hips. “Okay, Mr. Big Strong Guy. I Dare you to lift me up. I’ve got a big ass and hips, it might be a challenge for you.”

He stands up. You’re so close to him that your chests are touching. He gazes down at you. “I don’t think that’ll be a problem, Miss Y/L/N. And I happen to think you have a nice ass.”

Before you get a chance to reply, he grabs your hips and lifts you straight up. You squeal in surprise and grab onto his shoulders. “You’re light as a feather, babe. No problem at all.”

He slowly lowers you back down, making sure your body slowly slides against his. Jesus he feels good against you.

It takes you a minute to realize your feet are back on the floor, your hands still on his shoulders. His are still on your waist. You can’t seem to tear your gaze away from his. You can feel him pressed up against your lower tummy. He was hard. Jesus. He felt huge. He clears his throat.

“Truth or Dare, doll?”

You swallow the lump in your throat. You move your hands down to his arms. They felt nicer than you expected. He starts flexing. God damn. He could probably snap you in half without any effort. You bite your lip and meet his eyes again. “Dare.”

“Kiss me.”

You don’t even hesitate. You rise up on your toes and firmly press your lips against his. You move your hands back up so that your hands are resting on the back of his neck. His grip on your waist tightens as he returns your kiss. He keeps it light and soft. He pulls back enough so that he can make eye contact with you. “I thought you were giving up men, doll?”

You can’t help the smirk that graces your face. “That was before I felt your hard, cock pressed against me. You wanna put it to use, big guy?”

A low growl escapes his chest as he pulls you back in for another kiss. This one is more heated than the last. You moan into it. He pushes you towards Mr. Smith’s desk. He breaks the kiss and pushes everything off the desk onto the floor. He grabs you by the waist and picks you up to sit you on it.

You quickly spread your legs and grab him by his shirt to pull him back in for another kiss. He happily obliges and this time licks your bottom lip, wanting entrance. You decide to be a little tease and not let him in just yet. He doesn’t like that. He pinches your hip and you let you a little yelp, giving him the perfect opportunity to press his tongue against yours. The battle for dominance is short lived. You let him win. Damn he’s a good kisser.

The next thing you know, he rips your shirt open. You can feel your nipples hardening under your white laced bra due to the cold room. You push him back and give him your best pout. “Now I’m cold, Stevie.”

He gives you a naughty smirk and moves his right hand under your school uniform skirt and slowly slides it towards your center. “Don’t worry, doll. I know a good way to warm you up.”

A shiver runs down your spine as he drops to his knees in front of you. He places a quick kiss to both knees before he pushes your skirt up until it’s bunched up at your waist, exposing your white laced panties. He starts kissing his way towards where you need him most. You lean back on your left hand and thread your fingers of your right hand through his hair.

He takes both hands and hooks them into the band of your underwear. He suddenly stops and looks up at you. “I didn’t even ask you, Y/N. I’m sorry. Are you okay with this?”

You feel your heart skip a few beats. What a considerate guy. Justin never asked your permission. He just assumed you always wanted it.

You quickly nod your head. “Yes, Steve. Please, please don’t stop. I’ll let you know if I’m not okay with something.”

He nods and starts pulling your panties down. You lift your hips to help him out. You smirk as you see him pocket them. He throws your legs over his shoulders. He grips your ass and gives it a good squeeze. He pulls you closer towards his face.

He starts out by sucking a hickey onto the inside of your upper right thigh. Your fingers are still threaded through his hair. You give it a harsh tug. It earns you a growl. “Stop teasing. Need your mouth on me. Please.”

You barely get out the please before he’s licking a stripe from your entrance all the way to your clit. You throw your head back and let out a quiet moan. He moves his left hand to your center and pulls the little hood back to expose your full clit to him. He looks up at you. “Anyone ever tell you that you have the prettiest pussy, doll?” He winks and sucks your clit into his mouth. This moan you let out is not so quiet.

He smirks against your clit and lightly bites down on it. You involuntarily buck your hips against his face. “Jesus, Steve. Do that again.”

He happily does as you ask. He bites down a little harder this time. The pain is so good. The grip you have on his hair tightens even more. With his lips still attached to your clit, he starts flicking the bud back and forth with his tongue. He transitions from fast to slow flicks. He’s driving you crazy in the best way. You can feel that coil in your belly tightening. You’re close already.

Just when you think to yourself it can’t get any better, you feel his finger prod at your entrance. “Yes, Steve! Please fuck me with your fingers. I need it.”

He doesn’t need to be told twice. He slowly inserts his finger until he’s knuckle deep. “Fuck, doll. You’re so tight. Gonna feel so good when you’re wrapped around my cock.”

You whimper at his words. He attaches his mouth back to your clit and starts slowly pumping his finger in and out. “Mmmm. Faster, Steve. Please.”

Before he does what you say, he adds a second finger. He pulls back from your clit for a second and watches you lose yourself in the ecstasy.

“You gonna cum for me, doll? Gonna be a good girl and cum all over my fingers?”

You nod your head frantically. “Yes! Please, Steve. Make me cum.”

Steve picks up the pace of his fingers and curls them slightly so they press up against your g spot. He then attaches his lips back to your clit and bites down.

That pushes you straight into your orgasm. You cum gushing all over his face and fingers. He moans as he happily laps up everything you give him.

Once he gets you all clean, he raises back up to his feet. “You taste amazing, baby.” Then he pulls you in for a searing kiss. You moan as you taste yourself on his lips and tongue.

You start undoing his belt and unbuttoning his pants. He pulls away and looks down at you. “You don’t have to do that, doll.”

You lower his zipper and start palming him through his boxer briefs. “What if I want to? Unless of course you don’t want me to.”

He closes his eyes and drops his head forward as you push his pants and boxer briefs down and wrap your hand around his cock. It was magnificent. Definitely bigger than anything you’d taken before. You couldn’t wait to feel it stretch you open.

You start pumping your hand slowly up and down his thick shaft, using the pre cum leaking from the tip as lube. Steve rests his hands on your thighs, his eyes now opened and trained on your hand. “Fuck, doll. You’re driving me crazy here.”

You smirk and lean forward and start placing kisses on his neck. You pick up the pace of your hand just slightly. You move your kisses up his neck until your mouth is right by his ear. “Then why don’t you fuck me already?”

He groans and grabs the back of your neck to pull you in for yet another heated kiss. He nips at your bottom lip and this time you open right away, needing to feel his tongue against yours.

He suddenly pulls back and pulls your hand off of his cock. You are about to ask him what’s wrong when he grabs your hips and pulls you into a standing position. He looks down at you with an evil smirk. “If you want me to fuck you, why don’t you be a good girl for me and turn around and put your hands on the desk?”

Fuck. He doesn’t need to ask you twice. You quickly do as he says, shivering in anticipation of what’s to come.

He puts his hand between your shoulders and pushes you down until your elbows are now resting on the desk.

You wiggle your ass at him teasingly.

He quickly flips your skirt up and growls at the sight. You feel a hand come down hard on your left ass cheek. “God damn this is a nice ass. I bet it’ll jiggle real nice while I’m fucking you.”

He places his hands on your ass and gives it a hard squeeze. You let out a frustrated growl. “Stop teasing me and just fuck me, Steve. Please.”

“You sound so pretty when you’re begging for me. But you did ask nicely.” He grabs his cock at the base and slides the tip against your folds. You push back against him for some much needed friction.

He chuckles at your desperation. He pushes the tip into your entrance and pulls your cheeks apart so he can watch himself as he slowly sinks into your heat.

You clutch at the edges of the desk. You knew he was big but holy fuck. You can feel every vein and every ridge of his dick as he slowly bottoms out. It hurts but only a little. You let out a tiny whimper.

Steve rubs your back gently. “You okay, doll? Want me to stop?”

You quickly shake your head. “No, just...give me a minute.”

He continues rubbing up and down your back to help relax you. After a few minutes you wiggle your hips a little and the pain has gone away. You feel nothing but pleasure. “Please move now.”

He grabs your hips and slowly pulls out until just the tip remains in. Then he slowly pushes back in. “Fuck, baby. You’re so god damn tight. I don’t think I’ll be able to last very long. So fucking warm.”

He continues his super slow rhythm for a few more thrusts. “Faster, harder Steve. Please. Need you to fuck me hard.”

Steve smacks your right cheek this time. “Yeah? Need me to fuck you like the whore that you are?”

You clench down around his cock at his degrading words. You loved that shit. “Fuck, yes. Please.”

He happily obliges and picks up the pace. Soon the only thing that could be heard in the classroom is skin slapping against skin and your moaning and his groans.

With every thrust in his tip kisses your cervix in the most delicious way. You clamp down around him again. “God damn, baby. If you keep clenching around me like that, I’m gonna cum.”

You smirk to yourself and continue clenching around his cock. He’s now letting out some loud moans that sound like your name. He gives your ass another smack. “Want you to come first, sweetheart. You close?”

You nod your head and start moving your hand towards your clit. But it’s quickly smacked away by Steve. He moves his fingers towards your clit and gives it a hard pinch.

Your orgasm takes over your whole body. You know you’re shaking but you can’t stop it. You can feel yourself gushing all over his dick. This is the hardest you’ve ever cum in your life.

Your pussy clamps down on Steve in a vice like grip during your orgasm. He somehow manages to fuck you through it without coming himself. But he can’t hold it much longer.

“Fuck, baby. I’m gonna cum. Where do you want it?”

“On my ass. Cum on my ass, Steve.”

He gives a few more hard thrusts before he pulls out and fists his cock until his load shoots out against your ass and the back of your thighs.

You moan as you feel his spend against your skin. That was easily the best sex you’ve ever had. You’re not entirely sure you can move.

Steve puts his hands on the desk and leans forward a little to catch his breath. He moves your hair aside and places a kiss against the back of your neck. “You okay, doll?”

You slowly nod. “Oh, I’m more than okay. But is there something to clean me up with?”

Steve chuckles and raises back up into a standing position. He quickly pulls up his pants and briefs and tucks himself back in and zips himself up before going into the supply closet in the classroom to grab you some paper towels.

He comes back over with paper towels in hand and starts cleaning you up. Before he can get it all, you move your right hand behind you and scoop some of his cum off of your ass and stick your finger in your mouth. “Mmm, just wanted to taste you.”

Steve can feel himself getting hard again. “Jesus Christ, doll. You’re gonna be the death of me.”

You chuckle. Once he gets you all cleaned up, you raise your unsteady body up and try to straighten your clothes as best you can. You then remember that Steve ripped your shirt open and you are unable to button it back up. You playfully glare at him. “Well shit Steve. How am I supposed to walk out of here with my shirt undone? My jacket is in my locker.”

Steve’s gaze lowers to your exposed bra again. You snap your fingers to get his attention. He quickly gains focus and grabs his coat off the back of his chair. “Here, you can wear mine. I don’t usually wear it anyways. I like the cold.”

You happily accept the article of clothing and put it on and zip it up. It’s huge on you. “You are a strange one, aren’t you?”

His cheeks redden a little. “Not so strange that you just let me fuck you against Mr. Smith’s desk.”

You beam at him. “Yeah, well. What can I say? If I know I want something, I take it.”

Steve wraps his arms around your waist. “So….are you free Friday night? I’d really like to take you out on a date.”

You decide to tease him a little. “Well, I don’t know. See, I just had the best sex of my life and I’m not sure you can top that.”

“Really? Well, I bet I can. You just gotta give me a chance.”

You press a quick kiss to his lips. “I’m just kidding, Stevie. Of course I’ll go on a date with you. But don’t expect me to put out after.” You wink at him.

He grins at you. “We honestly don’t have to have sex after. I’d be happy with just dinner and nice conversation. You know, make a connection.”

You can’t help but match his smile. “That actually sounds really nice.”

Steve lets go of you and starts gathering his things. “Gotta show you how a man should rightfully treat a lady.”

You all of a sudden couldn’t wait for Friday. You grab your bag off the floor and head towards the door with him. He grabs a hold of your wrist and pulls you into him before you can get the door open. He smiles down at you and tucks some hair behind your ear. “For the record, that was also the best I’ve ever had.”

You smirk. “Oh, you haven’t seen anything yet.”

With that you give him a wink and open the classroom door and saunter out.

He just shakes his head at you with a smile. Not feeling this connected to anyone in a while.

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#happyhoelidays2020 #Steve Rogers #steve rogers smut #steve rogers x reader #Chris Evans #chris evans smut #captain america #captain america smut #steve rogers au #Cici91 writes

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