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yoongiseesawmp3 · 1 year

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all things end - mingyu

summary: you grew up with mingyu. he was your first kiss. your first boyfriend. the first man you ever loved. some things just aren’t meant to last, but during some time apart you struggle to forget mingyu, and he does his best to get you back. because who could ever love you as much as he does?

word count: 12.7k

warnings: afab reader, some gendered terms. ex!mingyu / childhood friends to lovers so plenty of fluff and angst, uhhhh scheming cheol too

masterlist

“what?” cheol groans, answering the phone despite being in the middle of a workout.

“can i come over?” you ask meekly on the other end, and his heart twists.

“bad day?”

“yeah.”

“sure, i’ll be there in 20. come by whenever.”

“thank you,” you sniff, and he hangs up, finishing his last few reps before rushing to get back to his apartment. this is your third bad day this week. your breakup is, understandably, hitting you hard. cheol can’t help but wonder, if you’re so torn up about this, why did you leave mingyu at all? maybe one day he’ll finally ask, but for now he just heads home and shoots you a text asking what kind of ice cream you’ll need tonight.

“so i was walking my dog,” you say, scooping a spoonful of ice cream into your mouth before you continue, “and you know how gyu always liked taking him by that lake at sunset?”

“sure,” cheol nods. “was it sunset when you walked by and it made you think of mingyu?”

“well. yeah.”

“and that’s what prompted today’s spiral?” he asks, grabbing the ice cream from your cold hands so he can hack at it with his spoon.

“i am not spiraling,” you say, trying to swoop your spoon in but getting knocked away by your best friend. “rude.”

“you spiral every time something reminds you of mingyu,” he says, “or when someone mentions him, or, the most idiotic part, when you see him because someone thought you should stay friends despite the messy breakup.”

“i hate when you try to be the voice of reason,” you complain.

“i’m not trying, i am.”

“it’s annoying.”

“stop having problems then,” he says with a mouthful of ice cream. you get up and toss the blanket in your lap back onto the couch, and cheol whines, “where are you going?”

“you’re obviously no help so i’ll just go back home and cry myself to sleep or something.”

“no fair! don’t make me feel bad for you! you put yourself in this situation! i don’t even know why you and mingyu broke up in the first place!”

“i’ve told you a million times,” you whine, sitting back down and tossing your head into the armrest of the couch. “we just weren’t meant for each other anymore.”

“god, why does your answer get more vague every time?” cheol teases, kicking you lightly with his foot. “am i ever gonna get the real reason? did you have a big fight? he doesn’t want kids? you called his mom a hoe?”

“we didn’t fight, i didn’t call mrs. kim anything mean, and we definitely didn’t fight about kids,” you reply, and cheol smiles like the cheshire cat.

“lemme guess. you’ve both already agreed on baby names?”

“shut up.”

“is one of them at least seungcheol? cheol junior? come on, i deserve it,” he pleads, finally getting a laugh out of you.

“if by some act of god mingyu and i get back together and decide to have kids we will consider naming a potential child after you,” you say just to appease him, your heart twisting because you know you and mingyu won’t be together again for that to even be a possibility.

“i’m holding you to that,” he says smugly, and you roll your eyes, leaving it at that. you’re both quiet for a while, passing the ice cream back and forth. you like that cheol doesn’t take you too seriously when you’re like this, because you need the break from your own thoughts. but it’s nice like this too, just being around each other. you decide to break the silence when you notice what time it is, getting up for real. “where are you going now?”

“home,” you sigh. “i have to get up early tomorrow to take fred to the vet, so i should go to sleep.”

“ok,” cheol nods. “text me what flavor you want tomorrow night and i’ll pick it up on the way home from work.”

“i’ll try my best not to need this tomorrow, but thank you,” you say. “i appreciate it more than you know.”

“anytime y/n,” cheol smiles. “let me know when you get home!”

“will do. night cheol.”

you’re up bright and early the next morning to take fred in for his appointment before you have to go to work. it’s allergy season, and no one warned you that your sweet little man could have allergies worse than any human you’ve ever met. fred has a rash on his back that he keeps trying to lick, bite, and scratch, so your vet gave him some medicine and a cone of shame to keep him from bothering the area for a while. you’re laughing to yourself as you take him home, eager to put the cone on him, just to see what it looks like. once you have it on, you laugh again and snap a picture because, yes, he looks silly. you post it to your story and forget about it as you go about the rest of your day.

a little after lunch, mingyu is taking a break from staring at his computer and goes to check his phone. after refreshing instagram, his heart leaps when he sees your icon at the top of his page, alerting him to what you’ve posted. yeah, yeah, he shouldn’t still follow you technically, but he can’t help himself. he only lets his conscious stop him for a couple seconds before he’s tapping your icon and viewing your story, which is fred in his cone of shame. mingyu, who loved you so much but quite possibly loved fred more, freaks out. something must be wrong, and before he thinks better of it he texts you to ask what’s wrong.

you’re in a meeting when you get the text. you’re bored out of your mind, otherwise you would’ve just let it be. but your mind keeps wandering and now that you’ve heard the buzz of a message come through you can’t help yourself. you lift your phone just slightly to take a look, and you slam it back down when you see mingyu’s name lighting your screen. you do your best to ignore it through the rest of your meeting, but your mind keeps wandering back to him.

your lack of a reply has mingyu freaking out even more. he texts a couple more times, asking questions so hopefully when you do reply mingyu will get the information all at once. but all of those go unanswered too, and he can’t take it anymore. he calls you, biting his lip anxiously as he waits to find out what’s going on.

your phone rings as you’re leaving your meeting, and your heart drops when you see that it’s mingyu. you haven’t had time to read his texts, but if he’s been bothering you this much it must be serious. you take a breath, preparing for the worst, and then you accept the call.

“hello?” you ask meekly, and you hear mingyu sigh on the other end.

“y/n,” he says, relieved. “finally. what’s going on?”

“uh, nothing?” you reply. “i’m at work.”

“huh? why?!”

“it’s a wednesday? most people with jobs work on wednesdays,” you explain.

“no, i mean what’s going on with fred?” mingyu clarifies, and that’s when you notice the worry in his voice. you used to be able to pick up on his emotions instantly, and it sends a jab to your chest that it took you this long to realize he was upset.

“oh, he has allergies,” you laugh. “he uh, he was bothering a spot on his back so the vet gave him that collar to stop him from licking it.”

“so he’s ok?” mingyu asks, and you nod as you respond.

“he’s fine, just inbred probably,” you joke, earning a little nose snort from mingyu. “listen, uh, i’m at work, so-”

“yeah, yeah, go, sorry for bothering you,” mingyu replies. “give fred a hug for me.”

“will do. bye mingyu.”

“bye baby,” he says without thinking. he hangs up, realization hitting him a second too late. he thinks about texting you to apologize, but he’s bugged you enough today. maybe you didn’t hear it? he can just ignore it, right? it’s not like you’ll be talking to each other soon anyway, so maybe you’ll forget it eventually.

the first time mingyu called you baby was an accident, too. you were really close friends, but nothing more. you’ve known mingyu since you were five, when his family moved in next to yours and your parents made you play together because you were both around the same age.

for you, he was the stinky neighbor boy who would make your heart flutter when he pulled up weeds and handed them to you like a bouquet of flowers. for mingyu, you were the pretty neighbor he wasn’t quite sure how to talk to, so he did things like pull up weeds for you. he usually showed his love for you like that, in more physical ways than verbal. one time, when you were about ten and he was almost twelve, you told mingyu you really liked another neighbor’s bike and you wished you had one like it for yourself. he still remembers asking poor dokyeom if he could borrow it, and he also remembers how much his parents yelled at him when they found out he had given it to you as a surprise. you teased mingyu about that constantly, still laughing over the memory of him walking the bike back to dokyeom’s house with the saddest look on his face. that was the first time he realized he only wanted to do things that made you happy, and it was the first time you realized mingyu was more sweet than he was stinky.

the first time he called you baby was late one night at his house. you had been friends so long your parents weren’t worried about leaving you alone together (secretly hoping you would wipe the idiocy from your eyes and fall in love already). you were in the basement at mingyu’s, sitting comfortably next to him on the couch and watching a scary movie, despite your protests. mingyu wasn’t usually a scary movie guy either, but your friends at school had talked about this movie so much that mingyu got teased for not watching it.

he had summoned you like he always did, standing on the fence in his backyard and shouting your name until you opened your bedroom window. your houses were so close you didn’t have to yell once the window was open, so you spoke normally as you told mingyu firmly that you would not be watching that with him. it only took a few seconds of him pouting for you to cave, and once you were settled on the couch he said passively, “don’t worry baby, i’ve got you if it gets too scary.”

that one little word had haunted you for days, by far scarier than the movie you watched that night. mingyu had called you baby. that’s not what friends call each other, that’s boyfriend/girlfriend stuff. and that definitely wasn’t you and mingyu.

at least to the two of you it wasn’t. to everyone else, you were an item. it was so obvious you liked each other that guys wouldn’t approach you, and girls knew not to fall for mingyu because he would never fall back. it took ages for you two to notice, but once you did, your life had never been more lovely. to love mingyu and be loved by him is one of the best things you’ve ever done. his love is deep and he loves hard, and for some people that kind of passion can be a little scary. it was definitely scary for you, even if took a while for you to notice.

just like the first time he called you baby, that one slip up on the phone stuck with you. you couldn’t tell cheol about it, because he’d just question the whole break up again, so you sat with it quietly as you played the sound of mingyu’s voice over and over again in your head.

days later, mingyu had already forgotten about it. he was worried at first, but when the world didn’t implode immediately after he basically let it go. you’d assume it was a mistake, not him still pining for you despite what happened. so he pushed it to the back of his mind.

that weekend, you found yourself at hoshi’s for a party. his apartment was packed, so you were prepared to get tipsy and then head home. cheol wasn’t there yet so you were bothering seungkwan instead, and he was doing everything he could to get rid of you. that includes pushing you into someone’s firm chest on accident, and you almost fall through the floor when you look up and see mingyu staring back at you in shock. you’re just drunk enough that you want to have a little fun with him, a mischievous smirk slowly forming on your face.

“hey, baby,” you emphasize, watching as mingyu’s face starts out hopeful and then falls slightly.

“oh, haha,” he laughs nervously. “hey. um, so you noticed that the other day.”

“i did.”

“s-sorry,” he stutters. “old habits die hard.”

you nod in agreement as you take a sip of your drink, not so sure now, with his big brown eyes staring you down, why you thought talking to him was a good idea. you usually spent these parties pressed up against mingyu’s chest, back to front, his arm wrapped around you lazily. suddenly you’re cold just at the thought, and you ache to feel mingyu wrapped around you again.

“how’s fred?” he asks, trying to keep you next to him for as long as possible.

“he’s good,” you nod. “doesn’t need the cone anymore.”

“aw, lame, those pictures were funny,” mingyu pouts, and you have to look away so you don’t have the urge to kiss him.

“yeah, well, i still have it so i can put it back on him if he ever gets annoying.”

“that’s good,” mingyu nods now, awkwardly looking around for a way out of this conversation without being rude. he misses you, and he was totally aware of that, but it’s easier to push it away when you’re not standing so close, your perfume encasing him in memories of when you were his. now you’re not, and mingyu wants to go home. he’s searching the room for someone to talk to so this moment won’t be so pathetic, but cheol comes to the rescue.

“hey ex lovebirds,” cheol teases, bumping into you enough to make you stumble. mingyu reaches out to steady you, but cheol grabs you by the waist to keep you in place, and mingyu has to look away or else he might light on fire with anger. it’s a simple touch, he knows cheol doesn’t mean anything by it, but it always bothered him when other people tried to take care of you. that was his job, and he didn’t like anyone getting in the way of that. “why do you both look so miserable? it’s a party. drink, have fun, maybe kiss a little-”

“i do need another drink,” you say, taking the first chance to leave this situation. you look to both guys before asking, “do you need anything?” they shake their heads, so you escape to the kitchen and mentally mark the living room off. you can’t go back out there now. maybe it’s time for you to just leave.

“so,” cheol says, smirk hiding behind his cup. “how’s your plan going?”

“what plan?” mingyu asks, obviously confused.

“your plan to get y/n back,” cheol replies nonchalantly. “you have one, right? otherwise i don’t see why you aren’t leaving my friend alone after such a devastating break up.”

“i’m your friend too?! what about me and my feelings?”

“you annoy me more than y/n does, so i’m on her side,” cheol jokes, and mingyu groans. “but seriously. what’s going on here? she won’t tell me anything.”

“we broke up.”

“i know that. elaborate.”

“no,” mingyu says stubbornly, crossing his arms. “that’s between me and y/n. she won’t tell you so neither will i.”

“god, forget it. i’m on no one’s side, you’re both annoying,” cheol scoffs. “match made in heaven, you two.”

it’s quiet between them for a moment, both men just sloshing their drinks around in their cups, looking around at their drunken friends ruining hoshi’s lovely home. mingyu thinks for a second, deciding if he’ll actually admit this to cheol or not, but he slams the rest of his drink and turns to his friend before he can change his mind.

“i don’t have a plan,” he starts off. “yet. i’m trying to feel things out. i tried giving y/n space, and that’s not working for me. i love her, dude. i’ll only ever love her.”

“then go get her!” cheol says incredulously, motioning for the kitchen. “she’s hiding in there so she doesn’t have to see you, she’d be easy to corner-”

“but,” mingyu interjects. “but. i don’t know if she wants me back. she broke things off, so i’m trying to respect that. i just...i don’t know if she loves me anymore, man. so i want to make a plan, i want to get her back, but i’m afraid of what would happen if it doesn’t work. if she really doesn’t love me anymore.”

“hm,” cheol hums before he finishes his own drink. he takes a minute, smacks his lips, then turns to his idiotic best friend. “get her back. as soon as possible, actually. she’s a wreck without you. whatever happened for her to break up with you, i’m sorry. but she hasn’t stopped talking about you since. she still loves you man, no doubt. so i think you should try. and let me know how i can help, because, man, she’s really been bumming me out lately being all sad like this.”

“she’s sad?” mingyu asks, sadness appearing on his own features, making cheol roll his eyes.

“i said a whole essay and that’s the only thing you picked up on?”

“no, i get it,” mingyu nods. “i’ll think of something.”

“good,” cheol nods, then points to mingyu’s cup. “you want a refill?”

“do you mind grabbing it for me?” mingyu asks sheepishly.

“no,” cheol says in disbelief. “you can’t be hiding from her too.”

“what if i am!”

“i’m so close to revoking my offer to help,” cheol complains as he snatches mingyu’s cup from him. “i’ll be back.”

mingyu’s conversation with cheol set his mind in motion. he hasn’t stopped thinking about you since, as if that was new. but now he has a reason to spend all his time thinking about you. truthfully, mingyu isn’t sure he knows why you broke things off. at least, he doesn’t know how to explain it to people. he knows it must have made sense to you, and to him, enough for him to let you go. but he just remembers one very tearful conversation where you told him you couldn’t do this anymore, and that was it. he’d steal the sun to make your world brighter, so if he wasn’t making you happy anymore he wasn’t going to stick around if you didn’t want him there.

but now. now he’s wishing he had fought back. asked questions. tried to fix things instead of just running away. he still loves you, and if cheol’s right and you still love him, then what the hell are you doing?

your first date with mingyu was simple. since it took you both years to realize your mutual feelings for each other, there wasn’t much you hadn’t already done together. you already tried out new restaurants together, went to arcades and movies and concerts just the two of you. you even forced mingyu to get a membership at your favorite museum so you could drag him along anytime there was a new exhibit you were dying to see. so when mingyu finally asked you out, he wasn’t sure what to do. he wracked his brain for the fanciest restaurant he could think of, or searched for romantic movies playing around town, but none of it felt right. none of it felt like you.

that’s why your first date was simple. he knew he didn’t have to do something grandiose to impress you, so instead he invited you over to his dorm and made you dinner. he wouldn’t tell you what he was making, but when you walked in it smelled familiar. not just because mingyu’s scent wafted up around you when he welcomed you in, but because the food on the stove instantly reminded you of home. you tried peeking at the pots to see if you could figure out what it was, but mingyu cutely pushed you away.

“you’re gonna ruin the surprise!” he whines, childishly pushing you out to the living room. “you can’t be in here!”

“so you’re telling me i can’t be around my boyfriend on our first date?” you challenge him, and his force falters. “i want to spend time with you gyu, let me at least be in the kitchen with you.”

“promise not to look at the food though,” he says with a finger in your face. you grab his hand and wrap yours in his sweaty, warm grasp.

“i’ll keep my eyes on you, deal?”

“deal,” he smiles shyly, squeezing your hand before pulling you behind him into the kitchen. he starts working with just one hand, so you let go of his other one to make it easier for him to cook. “why’d you do that?”

“do what?” you ask, leaning against the counter so you can sit back and watch.

“let go,” he pouts, reaching for you again.

“you have to use both hands to cook, baby,” you laugh, and you watch with love in your eyes as he blushes a deep pink.

“right,” he nods. “ok. it’s almost done, but if you’re hungry there’s snacks in the fridge.”

“i’m good,” you say quietly, watching as mingyu returns to chopping something. you silently admire him as he works, your heart warming as it settles in your mind: mingyu is finally yours. your first love. your only love, probably, is your boyfriend. how amazing is that?

“baby?” mingyu repeats, snapping you out of your trance. there’s the hint of a smile on his face as your eyes meet his. “did you hear me?”

“no, what did you say?” now it’s your turn to blush. mingyu takes a step closer, carefully placing his hands on your hips.

“i said it’s ready,” he smiles. “you were staring at me.”

“yeah, i told you i was gonna do that.”

“what were you thinking about?” mingyu barely whispers, his face incredibly close to yours now.

i was thinking about how much i love you.

“um, you?”

“what about me?”

“i was mentally critiquing your form,” you tease, a smile breaking out across both your faces.

“and how was it?” he asks, close enough now that you can feel his breath on your lips.

“you’re gonna chop a finger off one day,” you reply quietly, eyes drifting down to mingyu’s lips as you speak. he notices and the side of his mouth quirks up in a smirk.

“how’s my form now?” he asks before hastily pressing a kiss to your lips, pulling back almost like the touch sent a shock through him.

“could be better,” you squeak out, and he nods before leaning back down to capture your lips in a real kiss. it’s warm, delicate but strong, and it’s mingyu. you can’t seem to wrap your head around that part. mingyu is kissing you right now. you’re kissing mingyu. and he’s really good at it. sooner than you’d like, he’s pulling away again.

“how was that?” he asks, lips just barely grazing over yours.

“better,” you reply breathlessly. “you take criticism well.”

“i’m just here to please you baby,” he says, his words dripping with double meanings. you feel a chill run down your spine as you notice the hungry look in his eyes, and you clear your throat before speaking.

“so, um, can i see the food now or do i have to eat with my eyes closed?”

“depends,” mingyu replies. “you want me to feed it to you?”

“stop being weird,” you laugh, pushing him away playfully but instantly missing the warmth of his chest against yours. you ignore his smile and lean over the stove, heart picking up as you try to see what he made. mingyu puts his arms around your waist fully and moves you out of the way, back to his childish shoves and whines about ruining the surprise.

in a few minutes, you’re sat on his couch, eyes closed with a bowl of something warm in your lap. mingyu was serious about feeding you, at least the first bite, because he wants to keep the meal a surprise. as you complain about it for the millionth time, mingyu brings a spoon up to your lips and quietly asks you to open your mouth. you welcome the food, and your eyes shoot open when you immediately recognize the taste.

“chicken and dumplings?” you ask, and mingyu smiles proudly. “how’d you learn to make that? it tastes just like home. i can’t...i don’t believe you made this.”

“please,” mingyu scoffs. “i was over at your house enough that i saw your grandma, your mom, even you, make this a million times. i made it the exact same way.”

“i can’t believe this,” you shake your head. “i...this is perfect, gyu. thank you.”

“no problem baby,” he smiles as he cuddles into your side, handing you another full spoon. “your turn.”

“what?” you ask, confused, just to turn and see mingyu waiting with his mouth open. you laugh, letting your head fall onto his shoulder. “you’re embarrassing.”

“yeah, but you love it,” he laughs along, taking the spoon back so he can start eating too. as he goes on about how perfectly he cooked this, he misses the way your face heats up as you think, yes, you do love it. you love him, and you’re trying to figure out how soon is too soon to tell him that.

part one of mingyu’s plan is a little concerning. he’s not following you, no, he’s not doing anything that would make you uncomfortable, but...he is hanging around your favorite coffeeshop in the mornings. he knows he’s bound to catch you here at least once this week, and he doesn’t mind doing a little work in such a cozy place anyway. if he sees you, great. if not, also great. he’s been more productive the past two days than he has all month.

he gets lucky on the third day, because he hears a familiar laugh at the door and his ears perk up like an excited puppy. he sees you holding the door open for someone, and he tries to not make it obvious that he’s staring. you’re wearing one of his hoodies. if he had any doubts about this, now they’re all erased, because you’re wearing one of his hoodies. he didn’t even remember giving it to you, so it must have been one you stole from him. it’s old too, he can tell there’s a hole near the wrist that you’re trying to not accidentally slip a finger through. he keeps flicking his eyes up to you as you ask for your usual, mouthing the words along with you just to make sure he’s still got it. café con leche, sprinkle of cinnamon. when you turn around after paying, mingyu ducks his head down and goes back to work. he won’t approach you just yet, so he tries to lay low.

but you saw him the moment you walked in. a big dude like that? he sticks out immediately. your blood ran cold when you caught him staring at you, mentally cursing yourself for not changing shirts before you left the house. it might be a little pathetic, but you slept in this hoodie last night. the heat in your place hasn’t been working well and it was unusually cold, so you needed the extra coverage. this hoodie was the first thing you pulled from your closet, and you were too lazy to find something else. you won’t admit being wrapped up in mingyu’s scent helped you have the best sleep you’ve gotten since the break up. you try to ignore the feeling of mingyu’s eyes on you as you order, and when you turn back to the seating area you laugh to yourself seeing mingyu look away like he wasn’t boring holes into your back. you scan the room for an empty spot and find one, but your own eyes pull back to mingyu. you wait at the counter for your drink, and take a deep breath before walking over.

“should i go ahead and sit with you, or did you wanna stare a little bit longer?” you ask once you reach mingyu’s table, his head snapping up in shock at you approaching him without noticing.

“uh, i, um, i wasn’t, this isn’t what it looks like,” he blubbers, and you roll your eyes.

“you know if you wanted to talk to me you can just call,” you mumble as you pull the seat out and sit down.

“hey, i’m actually working,” he says, sliding his laptop around to prove it. “maybe i’m just here to enjoy the ambiance.”

“fine,” you nod, sipping your drink and loving the way it instantly puts you at ease. “don’t let me interrupt.” you start pulling out your own things, setting up your laptop before deciding you might want to read instead. you compromise and send some emails first, the rapid sound of your typing somehow comforting to mingyu. he resettles himself, accidentally bumping your leg with his under the table.

“sorry,” he whispers.

“it’s okay,” you reply, a sympathetic grin on your face. “with your long ass legs i’m used to it.”

“still,” he tries not to smile back like an idiot. “sorry.”

you fall back into silence, both of you working on your own things and “enjoying the ambiance.” you’re not sure how much time passes before mingyu interrupts the quiet.

“hey,” he whispers, grabbing your attention. he nods to your laptop and asks, “what are you doing?”

“i’m working, mingyu,” you laugh. “what are you doing?”

“working,” he replies quickly. “been a busy week for me.”

“hm, same here.”

“cold too,” he tries, smiling proudly when you shift in your seat. he caught you. “did you magically lose all your other hoodies and jackets, or does someone miss stealing my clothes?”

“i didn’t steal this,” you counter, accusing finger pointed in his direction. “you insisted i take this one because you didn’t want it anymore but you said it was too sentimental to donate. i did you a favor by taking this ratty old thing.”

“but you kept it,” he says happily, finishing his coffee and pointing to your long empty mug. “you want another?”

“sure,” you reply sheepishly, “a café co-”

“café con leche, sprinkle of cinnamon,” mingyu finishes in unison with you. then a sly smile as he says, “i remember, baby. be right back.”

“what the hell did you say to mingyu?” you bark at seungcheol over the phone. “why was he at my coffeeshop this morning? and why’s he suddenly calling me baby all casual like we’re still dating?”

“this is news to me,” cheol says, but you can hear the smirk in his voice. “i didn’t say anything to him. at least not anything i think he heard. that boyfriend of yours can be an airhead sometimes.”

“he’s not my boyfriend,” you grumble.

“but he bought you coffee this morning?”

“he told you?!”

“i’m not at liberty to say,” cheol laughs. “just enjoy it, y/n. whatever he’s up to, it can’t hurt to see where it goes.”

“i hate you both,” you groan, hanging up as cheol mumbles a “right, sure.” when the call is over, you fall back down onto your bed, mind working top speed to decide what to do next. you could move and change your name, leaving mingyu and cheol behind. that’s a bit dramatic. you could tell cheol to get fucked, but he’d find a way to bring mingyu into it. and mingyu. you don’t know what to do about him. you could just ask him to leave you alone, and you think he would. but a little part of you does want to see where this goes.

you wake up the next morning to the smell of something coming from your kitchen. you rush up, afraid you somehow left dinner on the stove and you’re seconds away from burning the building down. but when you crash into the kitchen, ungracefully, you’re met with mingyu’s muscular back as he looks for something in your fridge. at the sound of your frantic movements, he looks over his shoulder and grumbles out a good morning in the deepest voice you’ve ever heard. you’re stunned, not totally sure how he got here, and totally confused as to why he’s shirtless.

“um, whatcha doin?” you ask casually.

“i was gonna make french toast,” mingyu starts out, coming closer to you. “but you’re out of milk. so now it’s just eggs and toast.” as he gets closer, his hands reach out for your waist, and you let him pull you against his warm chest. “is that ok?”

“mhm,” you nod, not sure what to do with your hands. you don’t want to put them on his chest, afraid the skin to skin contact would ignite something dangerous in you. you also don’t want to put them around his neck because that territory feels just as dangerous. so that leaves you with your hands bunched up by your chest and mingyu looking on, amused.

“afraid to touch me?” he asks, a smirk on his stupidly kissable lips.

“no, um, i just-” you stutter, but what sounds like a phone alarm cuts you off. was mingyu baking something?

“you gonna get that, baby?” he asks, seemingly referring to the alarm but you don’t know where it’s coming from.

“what? it’s not mine,” you say, and you miss what mingyu says next as you’re jolted awake by something furry laying on your chest. you carefully open your eyes, afraid that maybe mingyu just forgot to shave and somehow he would be the one on top of you right now. but it’s just fred, and the alarm is yours. your phone is going off, reminding you that you’re probably gonna be late to work. you scramble to get up and start your day, but you can’t stop thinking about mingyu.

about halfway through the day, you get a text from cheol asking if you want to get dinner that night. his friend jeonghan, who’s always kinda scared you, has tickets to some concert out of town and cheol wants to make it into a big trip. cheol wants you to come, and he knows you two will be the only ones competent enough to plan the whole thing so he needs you as back up tonight. you agree, eager to get a break from work and from mingyu. going out of town will be a nice distraction, and even though jeonghan is intimidating he’s still really fun to be around.

speak of the devil, he’s the first to wrap you up in a hug when you get to the guys’ table that night, and he whispers something to you about mingyu being annoying and you’re better off without him. you smile at the condolence and let him drag you into the open seat next to him. he and cheol start filling you in on the plans, when you’ll leave, where you’ll stay, day of the concert, etc. you give some advice on things to do in your free time, and jeonghan types it all into his phone while cheol price checks your options.

“so there’s one airbnb with enough beds for each of us, but it’s $100 more a night, compared to this one with a queen, a twin, and a sofa bed, which is the cheapest option and also closer to everything we want to do,” cheol says, nose still in his phone.

“book the cheap one then,” you shrug. “one of y’all can take the queen bed as long as i don’t get put on the pull out.”

“i can take the pull out,” jeonghan offers. “i’ll sleep wherever.”

“and i’ll take the twin,” cheol says. “gives me my own room.”

“so we won’t be able to hear you snoring?” you ask. “thank god.”

“ignoring that,” cheol mumbles, writing something down on his napkin. “so that would make it $80 even for each of us for the whole weekend. i can book it and you can send me your money whenever.”

“sounds good,” jeonghan nods as he pours you all more soju.

“wait, that makes no sense,” you start. “it’s only $80? for the whole weekend?”

“yep,” cheol nods, waving the napkin in your face. “wanna check my work, teacher?”

“no, jack ass,” you laugh, pushing his hand out of the way before graciously taking the glass jeonghan hands you. “just shocked you found such a steal.”

“speaking of stealing things,” jeonghan says, “whose car are we taking?”

“mine is in the shop,” cheol sighs. “and y/n doesn’t drive.”

“guess we’ll take mingyu’s then,” jeonghan decides. cheol’s eyes flick over to you on instinct, and when he doesn’t see a reaction from you he smiles.

“cool, i can pick everyone up on friday then?” he asks, and you nod. with everything planned, your conversation can stray off to other topics while the drinks flow, and that’s how you end up flipping through jeonghan’s tinder for him later in the night. you’re maybe too tipsy to be doing this, but jeonghan likes the chaos of it, and cheol is just happy to see you having fun. he hopes this trip will help with that too.

cheol comes to pick you up, as promised, but he texts you when he pulls up that you’ll have to sit in the back. you get out of your building and recognize mingyu’s car immediately, tossing your bag in the trunk before grabbing the door to the backseat. when you slide in, you almost jump out of your skin when you see mingyu sitting back there too.

“told you it’d surprise her,” you hear cheol and jeonghan laugh, but you’re too busy trying to sputter out a question.

“hey y/n,” mingyu says shyly.

“hi?” you reply, looking to cheol who’s staring at you through the rearview mirror. “um? hello?”

“hey,” he smiles. “you buckled?”

“no she’s not,” mingyu replies for you, and you roll your eyes before you put the seatbelt in place.

“sorry, but what’s he doing here?” you ask. “you stole the car and the owner?”

“no, he’s coming with us,” jeonghan replies. “i thought i told you i had four tickets to the show?”

“no?” you say, voice at a higher pitch than you’d like it to be.

“is there a problem, y/n?” cheol asks, looking at you through the rearview again so if you really weren’t comfortable with this he would see.

“no,” you sigh after a second. “just didn’t expect it, that’s all.”

“for the record,” mingyu whispers, leaning close to you, “this was not part of my plan. i swear.”

“but it was part of mine!” cheol jokes, and mingyu kicks his chair. “hey, don’t make me pull this car over.”

“you mean my car?!” mingyu screeches back, and you lean up to whisper in jeonghan’s ear.

“why did you think bringing these two on a trip would be fun?” you ask loud enough for cheol and gyu to hear, making the car erupt in whines and cries while jeonghan laughs. it’s gonna be a long ride, you think to yourself.

you’re able to sleep most of the way there, only getting interrupted every once in a while when mingyu moves his long limbs to get comfortable. each time it’s an awkward half smile in apology, and you just nod in recognition. you don’t really want him here, to be honest. this trip was supposed to take your mind off him. now how will that be possible?

mingyu feels bad for surprising you like this, really. cheol asked him to come on this trip and didn’t say you’d be joining them until it was too late for mingyu to back out, so he wants a minute alone with you to explain. he wants to tell you that he can hang back, if you want to enjoy some time with the guys sans your ex boyfriend. he’ll do whatever makes you happy, like usual.

mingyu’s desire to talk to you is what leads him to follow you to your room at the airbnb, saying he’s looking for the bathroom but really he wants to apologize for the ambush. you turn back to the door once you’ve placed your things on the bed, jumping when you see his large form cowering in the doorway.

“bathroom’s not in here, gyu,” you tell him. “think it’s the next door on the left.”

“i’m not looking for the bathroom,” he says, taking a careful step into your room. “i wanted to say i’m sorry, for this. i didn’t know you were coming either, or else i would’ve backed out. i don’t want to make you uncomfortable.”

“i’m not uncomfortable around you, mingyu,” you say firmly. “i just-”

“you forgot your stuff dude,” cheol says, popping up behind mingyu and handing him his bag. then he looks at you quickly, smiling before he teases, “i see you’ve found the honeymoon suite?”

“the-what?” you ask, confused.

“you ended up with the biggest bed, y/n, so you gotta share with the friendly giant over here,” cheol explains as he nods in mingyu’s direction. “he’s definitely not fitting on the twin with me.”

“and i don’t like him enough to share a bed with him!” jeonghan shouts from somewhere else in the house.

“you’re fucking kidding me.”

“no time to complain right now,” cheol says as he checks his watch. “we’ve got dinner reservations. mingyu, bathroom is next door, you might wanna change your shirt before we leave. i don’t wanna stare at y/n’s drool while i eat.”

“my what?” you ask, looking at mingyu to see what cheol is referring to. there’s a spot near mingyu’s collarbone that looks slightly wet, and your hand flies to your mouth as you gasp, “i drooled on you?! how? why didn’t you push me off?!”

“you were asleep!” mingyu replies, voice an octave or two higher. “i felt bad! you just kinda fell onto my shoulder, and i didn’t wanna wake you up!”

“we’re leaving in five minutes, whether you’re ready or not,” cheol tells mingyu. he walks away, and mingyu grabs a new shirt out of his bag before heading back to the door.

“uh, gyu?” you call, and he turns immediately. “s-sorry..for, that, i guess,” you say, pointing to his shirt. “next time you have full permission to push me. promise i won’t get mad.”

“it’s okay,” he shrugs. “you know i don’t mind.” and with that, he leaves for the bathroom. you can tell there’s a blush on your cheeks, so you close the door and lock it while you take a minute to chill out. you decide to change too, not wanting to wear your old sweats to dinner even if it’s supposed to be laid back. you’re afraid now that you’ve got drool on your own shirt, so you change into something casual quickly and then join the guys in the living room.

once you’re there, cheol checks that everyone’s good to go, and you all walk out to the car. you don’t catch the way mingyu stares at you the whole time, or maybe you’re just ignoring it. you’re wearing a matching set with a jean jacket, nothing extravagant, but mingyu has the exact same outfit packed in his bag. you bought the sets together, for a last minute trip you took a year ago. mingyu wanted to get matching vacation shirts and you vehemently refused, so you compromised with a his and hers loungewear set. once again, mingyu’s heart soars at the little nod to your time together, because clearly you’re not as detached from it as you claim to be.

at dinner, jeonghan insists on sitting next to you again, so you’re squished into the booth next to him while mingyu looks on in not-so-hidden jealousy. he’s sitting across from you, scanning the menu and trying not to flick his eyes up to you. jeonghan starts talking about what he wants to try, and cheol asks if they should just order a bunch of plates and share everything.

“eh, you guys can do that, but there’s really just one thing i wanted to try,” you say, pushing the menu away now that you’ve found what you want.

“lemme guess,” cheol says as his eyes scan the menu. “you’re gonna get something lame, like chicken alfredo.”

“no,” you shake your head. “i’m trying something new, but it’s not as tomato heavy as the stuff you want, which all sounds nasty, by the way.”

“why’d you agree to come to an italian restaurant if you think the food is nasty?” cheol counters.

“you all seemed excited about trying it,” you shrug. “and like i said, there’s one thing i want. that’s enough.”

“what’s that one thing?” jeonghan cuts in, trying to stop cheol from bickering further.

“let me guess this time,” mingyu smiles. your eyes meet his and you blush under his gaze, thankful for the low lighting at the table. hopefully the guys don’t catch it. you nod and encourage mingyu to take a stab at it, and he pretends to look at the menu again even though this was the first thing he noticed. “you’re getting the gnocchi in the truffle sauce, but you really agreed to italian because you want to get tiramisu for dessert.”

“i, yeah, you got me,” you stammer out.

“what drink is she gonna get?” cheol asks with a smile, head leaning on his hand as he watches in amusement.

“hm,” mingyu looks at the menu seriously. “maybe an espresso with the tiramisu, but i bet you’ll try to make us order the digestif spritz thing at the end of the meal.”

“shut up,” you say, kicking his foot lightly under the table. “i was gonna try it myself, i won’t force y’all to try it if you don’t want to.” jeonghan, not picking up on the eyes you and mingyu are making at each other, joins in.

“i thought about trying that too,” he nods, looking at cheol and asking what he wants to order to share. while they discuss an inordinate amount of food, you’re just staring at mingyu, who’s looking at you smugly. finally you just shake your head and look back down at the menu, judging whatever the other boys decided to order. when the waiter comes back, mingyu smiles proudly as you order exactly what he predicted. mingyu nudges your leg playfully under the table, and you’re about to fight back when jeonghan cuts through your thoughts. “wait, did i tell you guys about the dream i had in the car?”

“i didn’t know you fell asleep,” cheol shakes his head.

“i did, when you were complaining about that girl who wouldn’t call you back.”

“hey!”

“anyway,” jeonghan starts again. “i had a dream that i was at work and y/n came in,” he smiles at you. “i guess you complaining about your job made me subconsciously think we should hire you at my office?”

“anything is better than my job right now,” you laugh, imagining how nothing would get done if you and jeonghan worked together.

“but you came in, and i was going to start training you, and then mingyu comes out of the boss’s office and is like no she’s here to take your job-”

“wait, mingyu was there?” you ask before you can stop yourself.

“yeah, i was there?” mingyu teases. “you in love with me or something?”

“y/n why is that so shocking,” cheol asks more as a statement than a question. “i told you about my mingyu dream, we’ve all got one.”

“please don’t bring that up again,” mingyu groans, head dropping. you smile at the memory of cheol’s legendary mingyu dream, which was basically just dream mingyu being so drunk he somehow climbed a telephone pole and got stuck so he called cheol to come help because he’s “strong and manly.”

“y/n do you have a mingyu dream?” jeonghan asks, and you blush deep enough that they can clearly see it this time, despite the lighting.

“um, i don’t really remember any from when, uh, from recently,” you start. “i guess i had one the other night, but it was one of those dreams that i barely remembered when i woke up. i just know mingyu was there.”

“where was i?” he asks, totally invested now.

“yeah, where was he?” cheol parrots.

“um, my kitchen?”

“can he even fit in there?” jeonghan jokes, but you ignore him.

“so i was cooking for you?” mingyu pesters you, and you nod.

“well, kinda,” you reply. “i don’t really remember.”

“was it a dirty dream?” cheol jokes. “is that why you don’t remember?”

“no, asshole,” you reply. thankfully, the first round of plates arrives to the table then and everyone is distracted for a while. you have to shake the feeling of mingyu staring at you though. it’s like he knows there’s more to the dream than you let on, but you’re not gonna unpack it with the other two sitting right here.

“y/n,” mingyu calls your name quietly. you look up and find him holding a small plate out very politely, and then he gives you his sweetest smile before asking, “can i try a gnocchi?”

“sure,” you nod, scraping one off your plate onto his. “it’s really good.”

“give me one,” cheol says, and before he can even finish you shake your head.

“nope,” you say as you pop another piece into your mouth. “you didn’t ask nicely.”

“whatever,” he grumbles.

the rest of dinner is nice, the food is great, you got your tiramisu and your weird drink at the end of the night, and cheol and jeonghan got sloshed on an expensive bottle of wine. you’re laughing with mingyu as you guide the two drunkards back to the car, struggling to get cheol to put his seatbelt on. once the toddlers are settled you turn to ask mingyu if he’s gonna drive, just to see him waiting for you by the passenger side.

“what are you doing?” you ask quietly.

“being a gentleman,” he replies simply, opening the door for you and handing you the jacket you almost left in your seat. you thank him quietly, heart picking up speed. he closes the door for you before he gets to the driver’s side, and then you’re on your way back to the airbnb. mingyu wordlessly hands you the aux, and you take it as you shuffle your library, not concerned with whatever song comes on. the first one to play is mary’s song by taylor swift, a song that has always reminded you of the way mingyu loved you. for a second, you let yourself reminisce and feel the warmth that mingyu’s love always gave you. absentmindedly, your hand reaches for his on the center console, and when you realize what you’ve done you just pull back like it was an accident. mingyu knows it wasn’t, though. he drives on in content, happy just to be sharing this moment with you, regardless of the circumstances.

back at the house, the guys let you take the bathroom first so you can shower. you promise to be quick, but while you’re in there you relish having a moment to yourself. it’s always nice, even when you’re with people you love, to have a second to yourself on a trip like this. it turns out doing you dirty this time, because the longer you’re left to your own thoughts the more they wander back to mingyu. back to how much you love him, how much he loves you, and how much that scares you. it wasn’t like you left because you didn’t care about him anymore. you were afraid you cared too much, and that it would end up hurting you one day. as all these thoughts pass through your head, you notice you’ve started crying. the shower quickly wipes your tears away, so you finish up and try to collect yourself as you get dressed. you take a couple extra minutes to pamper yourself, using the products the airbnb host left out for guests to try and steady your breathing. you take note of the fancy lotion, contemplating whether or not to steal this one, when jeonghan yelling in the hallway brings you back to reality.

clean and ready for bed, you emerge from the shower with your things in your arms. you almost drop them when you bump into mingyu leaving your room, arms laden with blankets and pillows. you look at him confused before asking what’s going on.

“where are you going?” you ask as you move further into the bedroom, noticing that mingyu has moved all of his things.

“i’m setting up my bed,” he replies.

“i thought you were sleeping with me?” you say, noticing too late how that sounds. “i mean, wait, sorry-”

“yeah, i was supposed to sleep in here, but jeonghan said i can make a bed on the floor and sleep in the living room with him,” mingyu explains with a small smile.

“why?”

“i don’t wanna bother you, y/n,” he says. “i don’t mind.”

he stands there, staring at you, almost like he’s waiting for you to say something. you want to tell him he doesn’t have to sleep on the floor, you want to tell him it’s not a bother, but above all you want to tell him not to leave. with an aching heart you realize, you really want him to stay. but he takes your quiet demeanor as a sign to go, so he turns around and steps back into the hallway.

“mingyu,” you call out quickly, pulling his attention back to you.

“yeah y/n?” he asks, a glimmer of hope in his eyes.

“mingyu,” you repeat, this time with a touch of sadness in your voice. “just come to bed with me.”

his heart jumps into his throat for a few reasons, first, because you asked him to come to bed with you. to share space with you after so long. he could jump and clap with joy right now, but the sad way you said his name is the other reason his heart is in his throat. that’s when he notices your puffy eyes, and he asks quietly, “have you been crying?”

you don’t need to respond. mingyu already knows. he drops everything in his arms, kicking them out of the way so he can wrap you in his arms instead. you sigh into his chest, willing the tears burning at your eyes to go away, but you let a few slip through as you whisper “i’m sorry” over and over again right above where mingyu’s heart is.

“baby,” he says, pulling your gaze up to his face, then, when your eyes meet his warm ones, “my love. what are you sorry for?”

“for running away,” you whisper. “i got sc-scared, and i’m s-sorry,” you explain as the tears start to fall again. mingyu wraps you back up in his embrace, awkwardly waddling you both toward the bed. his sounds of struggle make you giggle, a happy reprieve from the heart breaking cries mingyu so deeply wishes he could stop for you, but he knows you need to get this out.

“what were you scared of?” he asks as he helps you sit on the edge of the bed, your hands wrapped tightly in his.

“you,” you laugh lightly, making mingyu whine. you smile and put your hand on his cheek, rubbing your thumb over his soft skin as you continue. “it was like one day i woke up and realized how much you loved me. and that was scary. you’ve always been my mingyu, you always will be, but life has just changed so much from when we were kids. things aren’t as easy anymore, and i guess i preemptively got scared that we wouldn’t be easy anymore. the idea of losing you,” you take a deep breath, “of you not loving me anymore one day. that scared the shit out of me.”

“things haven’t changed that much then,” mingyu says with that teasing lilt in his voice you know so well. he looks at you mischievously as he goes on, “you’re still that little kid who runs away when our games stopped going your way.”

“don’t be a dick,” you laugh, head falling onto mingyu’s shoulder. “i know it was silly. but it’s like, once i made that decision, once i decided i had to leave, i couldn’t just come running back the next day when i missed you. i had to sit with it. i made the decision, i needed to face the consequences.”

“you missed me the next day?” mingyu asks, and you scoff.

“you haven’t changed either,” you tell him. “you’re still the world’s best selective listener.”

“i heard what you said,” he nods. “and i won’t say i understand it, but i still love you, y/n. i can promise you that will never change.”

“but-”

“no buts,” he cuts in, pushing your head off his shoulder so he can cup your cheeks and make sure you’re looking at him as he says, “i’m yours. till the end of forever.”

when you were maybe fifteen - that awkward age where you wanted a boyfriend but didn’t want to admit it - mingyu was over at your house. you were so into him, but didn’t realize it yet. mingyu was warming up to the idea of you being his girlfriend, but he was afraid of asking and you turning him down. so you just remained closer than friends, and kept doing what you always did together.

that day, you were trying to do homework, but mingyu kept going through this pile of things under your desk. your mom made you clean up the storage closet, and you had found y/n relics that you wanted to keep. one of which mingyu was digging for.

“i’m telling you, it’s not in there,” you say for the millionth time, laughing when he bumps his head somewhere underneath your desk.

“ouch,” he whines, and you kick his butt to add to the pain. “ouch!”

“get up!” you whine back, pulling at his ankle. “even if you find my diary i’m not gonna let you read it.”

“yeah, but,” he says as he crawls out, “i am bigger and stronger than you, y/n.”

“so?”

“so i could throw you if i wanted.”

“then i’d tell your mom you’re being mean to me.”

“she knows you probably deserve it at this point in our relationship,” he mumbles. your ears warm at hearing him call this a relationship, but the way he’s not moving his right hand from under your desk is more important to you right now.

“whatcha got there?” you ask calmly.

“nothing,” he smiles the biggest grin you’ve ever seen.

“show me both your hands.”

“no.”

“mingyu!”

“y/n!”

“why do you even wanna see it,” you whine as you join him on the ground, trying to swipe for your diary in his hand. “it’s embarrassing.”

“i’m looking for something,” he says as he starts flipping through the pages of your pink velvet powerpuff girls diary. you laugh together over the many different ways you spelled diary as a child, until he stops on a page that makes you sick to your stomach.

it’s a picture. of you. and mingyu. on your wedding day. you’re in a big poofy dress and you’ve drawn mingyu with...a ponytail? and a bowtie bigger than his head. it’s clearly the two of you, because baby y/n took the courtesy of labeling you both for future historians (mingyu) to use against you. then down at the bottom, in horrible handwriting, are the words “me and gyu till the end of forever.”

after you’ve both taken a moment to stare at the page, you in disbelief and mingyu in complete adoration, he tears it right out.

“wha-”

“bye y/n,” he says, standing up and heading to your door.

“where are you going? give me that page back!” you shriek. you want to get up and take it from him, but he was right: he’s bigger and stronger than you, so that wouldn’t end well. you kick at his ankles instead, but he just folds the paper up and puts it in his pocket before making a face and leaving.

you didn’t think about that day, or that drawing, until just now. until mingyu said those words to you again. you watch in shock and admiration as he finds his wallet amongst his things and pulls out a small, folded piece of paper. he hands it to you, but you already know what it is. you rub it between your fingers, letting every moment that you’ve known mingyu, that you’ve been loved by mingyu, wash over you. you want to cry again. his love is so strong that it makes you feel the most intense emotions, but right now you just feel...content. you hand the paper back to him, and wave away the questioning look in his eyes.

“like i said, i’m sorry gyu,” you start out. “i’m sorry i ever doubted how much you loved me. i’m sorry i ever doubted how much i love you, too. it’s just scary. we’ve got so many big life things ahead of us, and i know i can’t do it without you by my side, but i don’t want our love to change. i always want you to be my playful, clumsy, perfect mingyu. and i just let my thoughts..and my pride..get in the way of that. so i’m sorry, lovebug.”

“lovebug?” he smiles, his whole face blushing at your favorite nickname for him resurfacing. he stares at you deeply, his hands itching in his lap to hold you again, and you think for a moment he’s going to kiss you. instead he lets out a breath and says, “i’m sorry too.”

“what do you have to be sorry for?” you laugh nervously.

“for ever letting you think for a second that i don’t love you as much as i do,” he replies. “i’ll work harder from now on.”

“no,” you say quietly, and you watch the confusion wash over mingyu’s features. “let me. i think it’s my turn to show you how much i love you. you’ve been doing it for years.”

“well if you insist,” he smiles shyly, eyes flicking down to your lips. you don’t have to nod for him to know it’s ok, and then he’s kissing you again. when you pull back, mingyu’s eyes are still closed, savoring the feeling of having your love all to himself again.

“cmon lovebug,” you whisper over his lips, “let’s go to bed.”

the next morning, you wake up sweating. your body amazingly forgot what it was like sleeping next to your mingyu shaped space heater, and it’s made worse by the fact that his arms have been tightly wrapped around you all night. you laugh when you wiggle and he pulls you closer, surprised that you can still breathe despite his tight grip. you get a hand free from his hold and try your old trick to get mingyu to unwrap you, lightly flicking his nose until he brings an arm up to swat you away.

you use this as a chance to slide out of bed, determined to make it to the kitchen to make good on your promise to mingyu last night. you want to show him how much you love him, and the first step to reminding him of that is to make his favorite breakfast. you think there’s enough ingredients in the kitchen, cheol packed groceries so you wouldn’t have to rely on take out all weekend. so you find one of mingyu’s sweaters and pull it over your pajamas before heading to the kitchen. you put your mingyu playlist on so you have some quiet background noise, careful not to wake jeonghan up in the next room. as you’re searching the spice cabinet, you feel a strong pair of arms wrap around your waist.

“why are you awake right now,” mingyu’s groggy voice whines into your neck. “come back to bed.”

“no,” you say simply. “i’m hungry. you can go back to bed and i’ll be there in a minute.”

“no,” mingyu replies. “miss you too much.”

“baby.”

“yes?”

“no, i’m calling you a baby,” you laugh, turning in mingyu’s arms once you find what you needed. “can you at least let go so i can cook?”

“what are you making?” he asks, loosening his grip but not letting go completely. you shuffle back to the kitchen island, mingyu coming with you, his hands still lightly on your waist.

“french toast,” you say shyly, feeling the warmth of mingyu’s smile without having to look at him.

“i love you, you know that?” he whispers into your ear, kissing your cheek quickly before he lets you go. you hear him shuffle to the sink, water running as he asks, “how can i help?”

“can you slice the bread for me?” you ask. “and warm the pan up.”

“yes chef!”

your giggles at mingyu’s behavior are what finally pull jeonghan out of his deep sleep, and he smirks when he sees you two moving happily around the kitchen together. he doesn’t want to ruin the moment so he just snaps a picture and texts it to cheol, hearing the man react with a cheer once the text goes through. jeonghan laughs and rolls back over, falling asleep to the sound of mingyu humming a song to you as the sweet smell of breakfast fills the house.

when it’s time for you all to head back home, mingyu offers to drive and the other two insist on you taking the front seat. mingyu starts planning who to drop off first, beginning with jeonghan, then cheol, then you.

“you’re dropping y/n off last, hm?” cheol says with a wiggle of his eyebrows. “starting the honeymoon already?”

“shut up,” you groan.

“yeah, shut up,” mingyu mimics you. “it just makes sense though, y/n’s place is closest to mine and i need to drive my own car home. so it works out.”

“sure,” cheol nods. “no ulterior motives.”

“really!” mingyu shrieks, his ears turning red so you know this is getting to him. “i mean, i want to see fred too, but-”

“babe, stop talking,” you say quietly, placing your hand on his in the center console. “you’re just egging him on.”

“please listen to her,” jeonghan grumbles, obviously trying to sleep.

“she called him babe though,” cheol whispers to jeonghan, and they start giggling like little girls.

“ok, now everybody stop talking!” you say, looking at the boys in the rearview mirror. “quiet game, starting now. first one to speak has to buy lunch.”

“and gas!” mingyu adds.

“hey, doesn’t that mean mingyu just lost?” cheol asks, and you shake your head. “but he spoke first!” you just stare harder. “you’re playing favorites.”

“no i’m not,” you reply. “game starts now.”

after mingyu drops jeonghan and cheol off (who bought mcdonald’s and filled mingyu’s gas tank), he finally takes you home. when he pulls up outside your building, he stalls awkwardly at the wheel, unsure of what to do with his hands. you watch in admiration, a smirk playing at your lips. when mingyu looks over to you at last, he smiles shyly.

“hey.”

“hey,” you laugh. “you gonna come in?”

“really?” he asks, whole face perking up.

“either come in with me or kiss me goodbye, it’s up to you-”

“what if i come in with you and we make out in your apartment?” he asks with a smile of his own.

“deal,” you smile, “let me just get my bags.”

“nope. i got em,” mingyu says as he rushes out of the car, running around the front so he can get to your door in time to open it for you. you start to protest, and mingyu’s response is, “complain and i won’t come in!”

“you’re a liar,” you laugh.

“maybe, but i’m still not letting you carry anything,” he says while you get your keys out. when you’re done you turn and see him staring at the bags in the back really hard.

“what are you doing? trying to solve a math problem?” you tease, and mingyu looks at you with a blush on his cheeks.

“um, no, sorry,” he shakes his head, pulling your things out of the back before reaching to close the trunk.

“you’re not bringing your stuff?” you ask nervously.

“you want me to?” he asks hopefully, and you nod. he smiles and grabs his bag too, hoisting everything onto one arm before joining you by the door. his sweaty hand reaches for yours, squeezing it tightly as you open the door.

you make the familiar walk back to your apartment, mingyu’s heart beating out of his chest the closer you get. he’s waited for this moment for weeks, coming back home with you. but that’s just it, he’s been racking his brain over what could’ve scared you into running away, and he finally figured it out on the ride here. right before you broke up with him, he started talking about moving in together. he hadn’t asked you yet, but he was planting the seeds for it, and that must have scared you off. now he’s worried that once he walks through the door, he’s won’t want to leave ever again. he just hopes this time you’re ready for him to stay.

when you get to your apartment, you try to shake mingyu’s hand out of yours so you can open the door, but he just whines and tells you to deal. laughing as you stumble into your place, mingyu looks around excitedly only for his face to fall.

“fred’s not here,” he says with a growing pout.

“nope,” you shake your head. “he’s at my mom’s because i was gone for the weekend. sorry i didn’t tell you.”

“you tricked me,” mingyu says accusingly as he places the bags on his arm on your kitchen table.

“yeah, well,” you shrug. “you would’ve come up anyway.”

“how is your mom, by the way?” he asks as he walks toward you “missing his favorite person?”

“hm, no?” you reply. “she actually said you were stinky and she never liked you.”

“she did not,” he says with a smile, snaking his arms around your waist. “tell her i say hi.”

“and mrs. kim?” you ask as you drape your arms across his broad shoulders.

“she’s good,” he nods. “thrilled that you didn’t give up on me. i got chewed out after the break, by the way, so thanks for that.”

“you’re welcome,” you tease, kissing his chin. mingyu smiles without letting it reach his eyes, and he takes a deep breath.

“speaking of,” he starts cautiously. “the..break up.”

“the bad time, yes,” you nod. “have i said i’m sorry about that today?”

“can we..talk about it a little more?” mingyu asks, and your heart clenches. “if you don’t want to, that’s fine, i just...have questions before we go back to being us.”

“go ahead,” you encourage him. “do you wanna sit down?”

“no,” he shakes his head. “i’m good right here,” he says, squeezing your hips. “i just need to know what made you freak. was i coming on too strong with the moving in thing?”

“the what?” you ask, obviously confused.

“baby, i’ve been dropping hints since new year’s about moving in together,” he laughs. “you didn’t notice?”

“no?” you cry out. “why didn’t you just ask me?”

“i was scared!” he cries back. “why did you break up with me?”

“i was scared,” you joke in return. “i had no clue you wanted to move in with me.”

“well, i did,” he sighs. “i already have an extra key for you.”

“really?” you smile. he nods, and you lean your head on his shoulder as you reply. “you know my lease is up next month.”

“is it?” he replies, leaning his cheek on your forehead. “how convenient. i’ll make room in the closet then.”

“cool,” you smile, comfortably floating at the idea of living with mingyu. when mingyu clears his throat above you, you know what he wants. you pull him over to the couch as you say, “i know. i’ll explain.”

“kiss me first?” he asks, and you think about it.

“just one,” you say with a stern finger in his face, mingyu bites it, and then with your finger between his teeth he says, “no promises.” you pull away from him just for mingyu to reach back and cup your face, pulling you softly toward his lips. as soon as your lips meet you melt into him, his arms grabbing you so you’re sitting on his lap. “hey,” you say into his mouth, mingyu trying to kiss you deeper. “hey!” you giggle, pulling back. “i said one.”

“and i said no promises,” mingyu replies. “now cmere.”

“no,” you laugh, holding him at bay. “we need to talk.”

“i’m listening,” he says, playing with your hair.

“i was serious before when i said i was scared,” you start out. “but no, the move in thing wasn’t what scared me. i was, uh, i was out to lunch, with some of my friends, and one of them just got engaged-”

“who?”

“mingyu,” you whine. he mumbles out a sorry and let’s go of your hair, placing his hands on your hips. “she just got engaged, and we started talking about..wedding..stuff, and then the girls all turned to me.”

“oh?” mingyu asks with a smirk.

“yeah,” you nod. “and um, that freaked me out. they started asking why we hadn’t..weren’t..um, whatever. they started asking me questions, and i didn’t know what to tell them, and that just made me go down a very dark hole.”

“how dark?” mingyu asks with concern laced through his voice.

“dark like, what if you didn’t want to marry me? what if we got married and everything went bad? what if-”

“and you never thought to talk to me about it?” mingyu cuts you off.

“did i mention how sorry i am?” you try sheepishly. “that was the big life stuff i mentioned the other night. moving in, getting engaged. starting the rest of forever together. that’s scary stuff, and i forgot how easy you make things. i just got scared of the concept, i guess, and didn’t consider how you make everything feel okay.”

“i do?”

“yeah,” you nod. “you’ve made my life so wonderful, gyu. even though everything ahead of us scares the shit out of me, i can’t wait to do it all with you.”

“let’s wait on all the scary stuff,” he says, grabbing your hands to play with your fingers as he speaks. “we’ll take it step by step. starting with moving in together?”

“starting with that,” you agree. “i love you, kim mingyu.”

“i love you too baby.”

#kim mingyu #seventeen #kim mingyu fluff #kim mingyu angst #mingyu fluff #mingyu angst #kim mingyu one shot #kim mingyu fic #kim mingyu x reader #mingyu x reader #seventeen x reader #seventeen fic #seventeen one shot #mingyu one shot

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thatrandomartistjavi · 5 months

Text

Cheshire as a character is so misunderstood by the masses and it makes me so mad

Like is he a piece of shit? Yes, but he’s a piece of shit to people who deserved to be shit on

Not someone like Alice.

No, people in Wonderland aren’t mentally ill just because he said they were all mad there. 1. He has a very skewed view of what mad is cause the reason why HES mad is cause he acts like a cat instead of a dog

Even though he’s a cat. So yeah his conditioning has been teaching that if you don’t act like how we expect you, you’re weird and 💫crazy💫. So to me, it’s not exactly reliable. And 2. Mad was also used as a way to say that something or someone was ridiculous. Kinda like how we use the word insane nowadays. So what do you think is more plausible

That everyone in an entire land is mentally ill even tho most of its residents don’t show signs of mental illness OR that they’re being described as yet again, being ridiculous. Like how most of the book has been doing up until now

No, Cheshire didn’t purposely get Alice in trouble(she was barely in trouble anyways, they just made her the person to decide what to do with him). Nowhere in that chapter was there ever a time where Cheshire pointed fingers to Alice in anyway.

He also doesn’t hate Alice. They are friends. Please stop writing him as hating her. It makes no sense

You guys just want to villainize the cat for no reason other than the fact that you don’t like cats. Don’t adapt AIW if you don’t like cats

That is all

#also controversial take but 1951 Cheshire also was not trying to get Alis in trouble on purpose #he’s a troll he likes gaining a reaction from the queen that he thinks is funny without thinking of the consequences #the man has poor impulse control and also the worst foresight #he is not a villain #alice in wonderland #cheshire cat #javi rambles

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smolmakerel · 8 months

Text

"Dos oruguitas... enamoradas... pasan sus noches y madrugadas..."

Sam (ladybug miraculous holder Mariquita [Ladybug], to be specific) stepped out of the portal created by the holder of the rabbit miraculous. Her eyes were wide as she took in the ruined Paris.

Buildings were tipped over and somewhat shattered. A thick fog surrounded the edges of the city, or at least as far as Sam could see, and threatened to come forward and smother her. Glancing down towards the streets, Sam could see they were flooded with water which was steadily rising.

What the hell happened here?

When Sam first came to Paris for a job opportunity (a clever cover for whenever she saw her mother), she never expected to be gifted a pair of earrings for protecting the city from a magical terrorist. She never expected to have a partner, Gatita [Kitten] who acted like she was years younger than her (which, she probably was considering how much she talked about having to get home before her mother came back) who wielded the power of the black cat's destruction with ease.

What she never expected was to see her sister again - so close where she could touch her and not observe from afar.

She didn't want it to be under these conditions, either.

And if Christina hadn't mentioned Tara to her boss before dad... he left, she probably would've left Tara alone in Woodsboro.

"Llenas de hambre..."

Sam looked around in confusion. She knew she heard somebody singing when she first stepped out of the portal, but she figured she had imagined it.

Swallowing, Sam spun her yo-yo around and walked forward with caution. She could see the singing person sitting on the edge of what used to be the news and media tower. They were clad in all white leather, rocking back and forth without a thought.

It was sad to look at. Like a child zoning out to help deal with the pain.

Sam knew what that was like. She knew she deserved to feel that way, though, for what she did.

Leave.

Wait.

"Gatita?" Sam called out.

The singing stopped.

The person tilted their head to the side, the leather ears on their head flicking back before shooting up. They stand up and - oh.

Sam felt sick to her stomach.

"Mariquita!"

That was her partner. But... it wasn't her at the same time.

Gatita was staring at her with a wide grin that suited the Cheshire Cat more than her, and she was thin as a twig. It was as if she hadn't eaten in days.

Maybe months if what Tikki said about how the miraculous could help survive your body for a long while was true.

"You're back! I thought I lost you forever!" Gatita's voice wobbled with tears pent up over time. She took a step closer to Sam who, in turn, took a wary step back. "Oh... You're scared of me."

Sam shook her head. "I'm not scared of you, Gatita. But you... you are akumatized."

She stopped spinning her yo-yo and inched closer to her partner. She was staring at her feet, so Sam gently lifted her head by cupping her face. Gatita's breathing shuddered as she took in the warmth. It hurt Sam's heart more than she would admit.

"Save me..." Gatita whimpered.

Sam nodded. "I will! Where - Where's your akuma?"

Gatita closed her eyes and took Sam's hands in her own. She brought one of them to her chest - over her heart.

"It's right here. I... This kitty got into a bit of trouble and couldn't get out of it."

Sam nodded. "Ok. I got you." She hugged her partner and held back her tears. She had grown to love the troublemaking cat like another sister. "I'll help you."

"You're already helping me."

Before Sam could question the change in tone, she was grabbed by her wrists and thrown above Gatita. Her back hit the roof, and the air exited her lungs harshly.

"F-fuck..." Sam gasped.

"Cataclysm!" Gatita grinned down at Sam. "Once I get your miraculous, none of this'll even matter anymore!"

Sam rolled out of the way and spun her yo-yo in a hurry. Part of the roof turned to ash beneath Gatita's hand and crumbled away.

"Gatita!" Sam dodged another attack.

Gatita screamed. "That's not my fucking name anymore!"

Sam backed away. Her foot hit the ledge. She looked down at the water.

"It's Cheshire now," she growled out. "And she doesn't want to take your miraculous from your corpse."

"You aren't getting my miraculous ever!"

With that, Sam flung herself backwards.

Cheshire dove after her. "You can't run from destiny, Sam!"

... What?

Sam gaped at the cat as she fell. "What?"

Cheshire's grin grew wider. Sam felt nauseous.

"Sam Carpenter! Samantha..." Cheshire raised her hand. "Cataclysm!"

Sam hit the top of a bus and flipped backwards away from the cataclysm. A burst of negative energy shot out in a ring around them, and the water rippled below.

"How..." Sam began with wide eyes, "How do you know my name? We aren't -"

"Supposed to know who each other are?" Cheshire finished for her. She stood up and shook her hand off. "I found out who you were. And look what I did because of it! What we did because of it."

Sam looked at the sunken Paris and took notice of the moon shattered in halves.

They did this? Then where was the future Mariquita?

Cheshire cocked her head and smiled at the unasked question. "Don't ask questions you don't want the answers to."

Her face dropped into a scowl, and she raises her arm. A ball of white cataclysm was between her fingers, ready to snap and shoot at Sam.

"Now give me your miraculous!"

●○●○●○●○

Tara blinked as she watched Mariquita exit her room using the window.

"Mariquita?" Tara mumbled, a half smile on her face.

Today was tough for her. It was the anniversary of Sam officially leaving her when she was so young. She had her suspicions that Sam planned on leaving on her 18th birthday, but had to wait until she had more money to do so.

She told Mariquita about how this week would be tough for her, and it looked like she was trying to cheer her up.

Tara smiled.

Mariquita... She was like another sister to her. Deep down, Tara knew she could never replace Sam, but all Sam's been doing since they've met in Paris was piss her off. Mariquita, on the other hand, was Sam before Papi left.

Helpful, nice, loving.

Now? She was kind of annoying. Always stalking Tara in some way.

Tara wanted nothing to do with her. She left for years and decided to reconnect when Tara was grown up and resentful?

Shaking away her thoughts, Tara approached the note left on her bed. She picked it up and frowned.

"What's the hold-up, Bangs?" Plagg flew out from the inner pocket of her jacket. He snickered at her bewildered expression. "What? Cat got you tongue?"

"Sam?" Tara muttered, running her fingers over the signature. "Why would Mariquita give me a letter from Sam?"

Unless...

Tara gasped and nearly dropped the letter. Frantically, she tore the paper open and read it, feeling tears spill down her cheeks.

Plagg, fortunately, stayed quiet while she took the letter in.

She smiled. Then she frowned. "But... if Sam and Mariquita are one and the same, then I..."

Plagg began to panic, showing her a wheel of stinky camembert cheese. "Who cares about Mariquita? We should totally cat out on this delicious cheese!"

"I've got to talk to her! I have to apologize!"

Sam being Mariquita made a hell of a lot of sense!

Mariquita. She was always there for Gatita whenever she did something stupid. Always eager to try and shield her even though Gatita was there to shield Mariquita. Paris couldn't be saved unless Mariquita stopped trying to sacrifice herself and casted her Lucky Charm.

Sam... She was always near where Tara was. Always trying to talk to her. But Tara shoved her away, venom stinging her words, until Sam backed off.

You can't be hurt if you hurt them first.

How could Tara do this to Sam?

"Plagg, I need to go see Sam!" Tara dropped the letter with a firm nod. "I need to -"

"What?! Kid, you can't reveal your identity to her! You aren't even supposed to know who she is!"

Tara smirked. "Who said I had to tell her who I am? She'd probably make me give up being Gatita, and that can't happen."

"Wait! Let me at least finish my cheese!" Plagg cried.

"No time to lose! Plagg, claws out!"

○●○●○●○●

Sam hopped around the fallen Eiffel Tower with Cheshire hot on her trail. The cat was still flinging bursts of cataclysms at her.

"Cheshire, you have to stop!" Sam yelled.

Cheshire's ears flattened. "Stop? So we won't know who each other is?! Why would I do that when I can take your miraculous?!"

Sam flinched away as a cataclysm stings near her arm.

"Lucky Charm!" Sam tossed her yo-yo up and caught... a mechanical pencil?

Cheshire scoffed. "I wish I could rewrite what happened in the past, but there's only one way to do that now."

Sam ran away from the multiple cataclysms sent at her.

"You can't hide from me forever, Sam!"

Sam hid on top of the fallen tower. She spun her yo-yo as she waited for Cheshire to come up.

"Samantha..!" Cheshire sang with glee. "I know you're up here... Did you know that if a person has both the ladybug and cat miraculous, they can grant one wish? I have a perfect wish, Sam... Don't you want to be together forever? Two peas in a pod, thick as thieves! Dos oruguitas."

Had Sam not been in such a panic, she would've noticed that phrase. She would've noticed that only one person called them that.

She would've noticed that Tara was Gatita. Was Cheshire.

But she didn't.

Sam revealed herself and threw her yo-yo at Cheshire. It wrapped around the baton attached to her back and yanked it back into her hand. Cheshire growled in surprise.

"Your time's up, akuma!" Sam broke the baton and - "What?"

Nothing.

Cheshire called her cataclysm again. "Stop trying to leave me! You can't leave me!"

She slammed her palm on the tower, and spider webs crept towards Sam. She didn't have any time to swing her yo-yo before she was falling a hundred feet into the water below.

Cheshire breathed heavily. She shook her head. "No no no no! SAMANTHA!"

She pulled at her hair and laughed.

●○●○●○●○

Sam sat down beside Danny with a sigh. She met him in New York sometime after leaving California. They became... close... and now he's trying to help her reconnect with Tara.

Trying being the keyword there.

Once Sam heard Christina was moving and taking Tara with her to Paris, she used almost all of her money to buy a plane ticket. Danny, the stupidly handsome man, decided to tag along and pay rent for a shared apartment. From there, he helped establish their cover story for why they moved to Paris.

She appreciated the help, but it was really unnecessary.

Danny only gave her a look of disbelief, and Sam relented.

"Did you give it to her?" Danny asked.

Sam sighed. "Yeah."

"Then why are you so sad still?"

She shrugged.

She wanted to be in Tara's life again, but she didn't think Tara would want to let her in again. She was more of a big sister to Gatita than to Tara.

And she deserved it. She left. She left Tara all alone with that woman. It was all her fault.

"Sam." Danny nudged her.

Sam didn't bother looking up. He probably was going to say something so attractively stupid in an attempt to make out under the Eiffel Tower.

"Sam?"

Now that's new.

Sam snapped her attention up to see Tara. She came.

Tara looked nervous around Sam, shuffling on her feet, but she was determined.

"I uh... I got your letter," awkwardly, Tara said. Her eyebrows come together in distress. "Did you mean it? That you'll never leave me? That you'll always be there?"

Sam stood up slowly. She stepped forward and took her sister's hands in her own. Smiling, Sam nodded.

"I meant every word."

Tears wobble on Tara's eyelid. "¿Prometes? [Do you promise?]"

Sam brought her into a tight hug and kissed the top of her head. "Nunca romperé este. [I'll never break this one.]"

Tara began to cry.

And Sam was true to her words. Much to their mother's disapproval, Sam and Tara became close again.

Tara kept her identity as Gatita a secret from Sam, and Sam did the same. Tara felt like it didn't really count since she knew Sam's hero identity.

She was guilty. Sam kept next to nothing from her while Tara remained guarded at all times. At least, with part of her life. It was like she wasn't opening up to Sam at all.

And Sam obviously felt that way, too.

She was leaving Paris. She was leaving Tara. She was leaving. Again.

Fucking again.

Tara wanted to lash out when she saw the tears, but Sam had already ran away. Fuck her, then! Tara didn't... she didn't... need her...

She would be lying.

It was suspicious how fast the akuma came. And it was headed straight for Sam.

At first, Tara hated to admit, she thought about letting the akuma get her sister. She was so angry at Sam for breaking her promise. But then how would Tara stomach hurting her akumatized sister?

She revealed herself while cataclysming the akuma.

She didn't expect that information to get back to the villain.

○●○●○●○●

Sam hit the water and shivered. It was freezing.

She looked around underwater as she put her yo-yo to her mouth to breathe. She spotted two figures on the ground, frozen in time.

She swam down towards them and gasped. One of them was the villain. The woman had her arms up and blocking something.

The other one...

Sam's eyes went wide. She reached out and touched the scared face of herself. She crumbled away in the water.

Nauseous, Sam swam to the surface and threw her yo-yo at the nearest building. On her hands and knees, Sam dry heaved and shook all over.

"Do you see now? Why I need you miraculous?"

Sam shook her head. "No, this can't be the only way..!"

"Dios mio..." Cheshire groaned, head tipped back. She stamped her foot on the ground. "You saw what I did. What I became. You can't save me. I was doomed from the start."

Cheshire held out her hand, eyes begging for Sam to cooperate. "Please, Sam. Please give me your miraculous, and we can fix everything together! You won't have to leave me!"

Sam took the opportunity to grab Cheshire's tail-belt and break it, but no butterfly.

Cheshire scowled. "You aren't even listening to me. But I should be used to that by now, right?! No one ever listens to what I want! I'm always left behind!"

Cheshire began to cry. "Why do you keep breaking your promise?! Why can't you stay with me?!"

Sam couldn't dodge the kick to her stomach and laid on the roof in pain, grasping at the spotted armor on her body.

Cheshire shook her head, muttering to herself. "No, you can't hurt her. You need her, she needs you."

Sam backed away, holding her stomach. She knew she was cowering on the ground while Cheshire gathered herself, and that wasn't a smart move on her part. However, she would rather face her partner when she had more clarity than when she talked to herself.

"If I can't have your miraculous, then no one can! Mega Cataclysm!" Cheshire's hands began to shake as she raised them to the sky, a large ball of growing white on her palms. "I'll destroy everything! Not a single fucking atom will be left of the universe when I'm done! ¡Y ese es una promesa que nunca solucionaré! [And that's a promise I'll never break!]"

Sam clenched her jaw. "Wait!"

Cheshire stared at her expectantly.

"I'll give you my miraculous! Just stop! Please!"

The Cataclysm flickered out of existence. Cheshire shook her sore wrists.

"Sorry it had to be like this, Sam." She didn't sound particularly sorry. In fact, she was gleeful.

Sam stood and bit her lip. Cheshire tapped her foot, impatient.

It reminded Sam of Tara, in a way.

"I'm sorry you ended up like this, Gatita," she said.

Cheshire rolled her eyes. "It's Cheshire now."

Sam closed her eyes as Cheshire walked over and rested her head on Sam's chest. Her tense body relaxed against the older woman.

"But I'll forgive you." Her watery voice made Sam slow in her deceit. "I always will, Sam."

Sam snatched the bell from Cheshire's chest and backed away. Her heart burned at the betrayal in those blue eyes.

"Your time's up, akuma!" Sam broke the bell, and the akuma flew out. She quickly caught it and purified it.

Cheshire changed back into her Gatita.

Gatita looked around in confusion, taking in Paris in silence, and her eyes caught Sam.

"Sam?" Gatita questioned, confused. "Are you ok? What happened?"

Sam fought off the urge to hug Gatita tight and never let her go.

Instead...

"I'm sorry," Sam stated in an attempt to remain formal. "We aren't supposed to know each other's identity."

"You aren't my..." Gatita flinched, hurt at the rejection, but she nodded. "I... understand. It's better this way."

Just then, the portal opened and Cottontail poked her head through. Her ombre hair was frizzy as if she was the one running around fighting an akumatized Gatita.

"Uh, hello? We have to get going!" Cottontail said, hopping around. "What are you waiting for?"

Sam looked down at the pencil in her hand. It clicked in her head.

"I know what to do! Gatita, I know how to fix everything!"

Gatita was surprised at the tight hug she was pulled into, but she welcomed it nonetheless. She inhaled Sam's scent and nodded.

"You always do," she chuckled. "I trust you, Sam."

Sam pulled back to run to the portal.

●○●○●○●○

Tara didn't know what to do!

How did things turn out like this? Her sister was Mariquita and her mother -

Christina fucking Carpenter was Monarch. She was the villain terrorizing Paris.

All because she wanted to put her fucked up family back together. A family she tore apart with her lies.

But...

Everyone always left because of Tara, right? That's always what Christina told her, and it's been true so far.

No! Fuck!

It was all her fault!

How could Tara do this?!

"Tara! Mi vida [my life], don't listen to her! She's trying to get in your head!"

Sam.

Tara shook her head. She couldn't do it! She wasn't as strong as Sam, she couldn't fight off the akuma already infecting her mind.

"Sammy..." Tara sobbed. "I-I can't..!"

Sam shook her head. "No! You have to fight her! I believe in you!"

Monarch - No. Christina didn't bother saying anything. She simply grinned. She knew she had Tara right where she wanted her.

When Tara blinked, her black leather turned white and her eyes bled from green to blue.

She didn't know what to do anymore. She couldn't listen to them! She couldn't... take it!

"Sammy..."

Sam closed her eyes. "It's ok. Te amo, Tara. [I love you, Tara]"

Tara screamed, and the world exploded in a bright light.

○●○●○●○●

Tara blinked as she watched Mariquita exit her room using the window.

"Mariquita?" Tara mumbled, a half smile on her face.

She told Mariquita about how this week would be tough for her, and it looked like she was trying to cheer her up.

Tara smiled.

She walked over and picked up the note. She opened it and read the contents.

'Tara,

Life may seem difficult right now, but I know you'll get through it just fine. I've had my eyes on everyone in this city, and I've seen the amazing things you've done for it. You are special, and you are worth it.

If you ever need someone to talk to, I'm always available. I'll always listen.

I know we've only worked together a couple of times because of you being targeted by an akuma, but I care about you. You'll always be important to me, even if we never become close outside of my hero identity.

You matter to people.

-Mariquita'

"Bangs? Kid?" Plagg held up a piece of camembert and looked away, embarrassed. "Don't cry. It'll ruin my cheese mood."

Tara chuckled tearfully. "Sorry, just... Mariquita cares about me."

And, maybe, that's good enough for Tara for now.

~*~

"Dos oruguitas... enamoradas..."

Mariquita sat down next to Gatita as she sang softly into the Paris night.

"Where'd you hear that song from?" Mariquita asked.

Gatita turned her bright gaze onto Mariquita, and the woman smiled. It really felt like she was talking to Tara again.

"It's from a movie that came out a couple years ago, but... when I was younger, a friend and I used to call ourselves oruguitas. It means -"

"Caterpillars."

Gatita blinked in surprise before laughing. "Yeah, I should've figured you knew 'cause of your name and all."

Mariquita smiled. Gatita snuggled close and rested her head on her shoulder.

Mariquita and Gatita watch the full moon behind the lit up Eiffel Tower in silence.

#scream #scream 2022 #scream vi #scream au #my writing #sam carpenter #tara carpenter #fuck christina carpenter #miraculous au #I had an idea and ran with it #Yes I watch mlb. Yes I absolutely despise it. Yes I love it. We exist.#I think that's every mlb fan though #When your abandonment issues are so strong you destroy the world #Tara being the black cat makes so much sense to me #Sam being ladybug is less understandable #BUT Tikki helps Sam realize that it's ok to ask for help and receive help in return #Plagg just likes how relaxed and chaotic his holder is #Plus more cheese for him #If you haven't watched the show at least watch Chat Blanc in season 3 it's one of the only good episodes in that season #And has a lot of angst #Which explains the fuck christina carpenter tag too just so you know #Christina forcing Sam to break her promise and leave Tara 😬#I'm so tired. I wrote this for 3 hours last night then fell asleep then woke up and finished editing it #Oh well #Sleep is for the weak

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unohanaswetdream · 1 year

Text

THE KNOWING PT. 2/3

Now we're lying about the nights

Hiding all it behind the smiles

Take a look at what you did

You probably thought that you'd break my heart

You probably thought that you'd make me cry

But, baby, it's okay

I swear it's okay

♡♡♡ summary: - A glimpse into yours and Ignacio's relationship -

Something happened to your insides as you gave the girls one last glance at their state before you left them for Ignacio, nonetheless you choose to ignore it.

AO3 | PT.1 | PT.2 | PT.3

3.2k words

A/N i would recommend reading pt.1 ! but it doesn't matter if you read it before or after this part. smut ! smut ! and more smut ! was all it was meant to be but dw it will still be there, i just got carried away with reader's interactions w jo n amber n accidentally made them have a threesome ; / partly bc I want one with them LOL. so bc of that i had to split this into two chapters and have reader x Ignacio in the next one. But if you want to skip the threesome i will place '-----' at where it starts and finishes.

also, there is just more focus on reader's internal monologue than originally planned. bc of this there are dark and heavy themes of addiction where the reader is not the nicest which was reflected on in pt. 1 by the reader when they talk abt their and Ignacio's treatment of amber and jo. so pls be careful and remember to put yourself first .

WARNINGS - 18+ please - explicit depictions of sex - talks of addiction and usage of drugs - unhealthy/toxic depiction of relationships - swearing

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Stepping out of the car, phone against your ear ‘yes baby, I will be safe, yes… yes we have a designated driver… no I will not be drinking much… what do you mean ?.. oh, no I will not be doing drugs, honey you are like a worried mother hen… yeah yeah, I understand you are looking out for me, well if I have an overdose which I won’t the only drugs I will ever be doing is weed, the other shit increases my paranoia tenfold’.

Arriving at the door you knock only for Jo and Amber to welcome you in as you continue talking on the phone, ‘yeah I just got here… girls say hi’.

Liar. Cheater.

In their inebriated state they responded with a slurred yet confused ‘hi’ making it apparent they were not in the right mindset to be talking to anyone let alone knowing what was happening in the world around them.

You huffed in annoyance at their mindless state, how dare they embarrass you in front of your husband acting like out-of-control addicts, you wish you could have told him that they really weren’t your friends. You would never be caught willingly hanging out with people like them and knowing your husband probably thought you were voluntarily chilling with them frustrated you to no end, these bitches just did not know when to stop embarrassing you.

You are a disgusting and horrible person.

‘Are they ok-‘.

You cut him off, ‘okay well I’m here baby, see you tomorrow’.

‘Just please stay safe, I love y-‘, you end the call not caring what else he had to say.

You do not deserve him.

Turning to the girls you flash a grin almost reminiscent of the infamous striped pink and purple cat, The Cheshire Cat, thinking about what drugs were on the menu and what you fancied for the night.

‘Girls, girls, girls’, your voice like a siren calling them in as you walked up to them, moulding your body into theirs.

You lower your lips to their ears, giving a soft nibble on Jo’s lobe ‘what is on the menu tonight’.

You think you are better than them ? You are not nor will you ever be, you are worse than them combined or even times two.

None of them were in any state to respond but that did not mean their cognitive ability was completely impaired as they both understood what you meant, Amber grabbed your perfectly manicured hand and led you to the living room so she could present you the goods. The small glass table was covered in little bags with different substances, from clear and hard to opaque and fluffy like freshly fallen snow. Little buds scattered around the red leather two-seater, the one which was closest to the kitchen, the bong tipped over saturating the couch and buds.

You took a deep exhale at the mess, what a waste you thought as you looked at the now dampen buds.

This is a cry for help don’t you see ?

‘My loves do not sit on that wet two-seater until I clean it up okay’. They just nodded and sat on the dry couch to continue watching tv.

You grabbed the loose buds and bong to take it into the kitchen, grabbing the paper towel next to the tap you sandwich the buds between the two pieces of paper, drying them off as well as you could. Once satisfied you left the buds on a fresh piece of paper towel to continue drying off, while you filled the bong up with fresh water. It was an ordinary bong, it had green and blue tinted swirls on the glass with a classic base, a ring of decolouration on the inside of the bong demonstrating it had not been cared for. You could tell Ignacio bought it for them without a care in the world if they would like it or not. It was probably the first one and the cheapest one he saw, something that would get the job done, he was not a thoughtful person, especially if it was for someone, he did not give a flying fuck about them or what they wanted.

You decided to take the whole roll of paper towels to dry the couch off with, yet something caught your eye as you were about to leave, the top kitchen drawer which in any other house would be the cutlery drawer. You carefully opened it so the girls would not notice you, allowing you to snag a little baggy filled with white powder to take home – a normal occurrence when you would come to Ignacio’s house, you’d refuse to call it a habit even with the glaring evidence that you started coming over to his house more and more frequently since you discovered what was hiding in there – not caring that technically you were stealing, but what would they do, call the cops ? Like hell, the worse they could do is cry to Ignacio yet, he would just chalk it up to them being too high to remember and even if they blamed you, you were the favourite and you would take whatever advantage that would come with it.

You are just as reliant on that shit like they are and yet you judge them without knowing how they got to be here.

Running your hand over the laminated bench that tried its hardest to look like marble, you were disgusted. With the sheer amount of drugs Ignacio had within this house he could easily get real marble for the whole house let alone the bench, what was he doing with his life.

Projecting much, huh ?

You’re so miserable it is embarrassing.

Slipping the bag into the pocket of your jacket, you beelined back to the couch with the bong in one hand and the roll of paper towels in the other determined to have the couch cleaned as soon as possible so you could begin to unwind.

Finally, you place the back of your hand on the couch to make sure it was dry enough to sit on, the paper towels you used to wipe the water thrown on the floor, honestly you did not care if it was wet, you just wanted to take a hit and a drink of the Smirnoff that was on the floor eyeing you seductively.

‘Hey, Jo could you be a dear for me and pass me that grinder on the floor and the bottle of Smirnoff, thank you baby girl’.

As you received your gifts from jo, you sat yourself in the middle of the couch your legs spread like you were man spreading not caring if your skirt wasn’t covering anything. You placed the bottle to the left of you and checked in the top compartment of the grinder to see if there was any weed left to grind only to find it empty and this is where you started to pray that there was some either in the chamber or kief compartment but knowing how mindless they were they probably forgot about that bottom compartment.

Just because they do drugs does not mean they are idiots; you are still one when you are sober.

God pulled through and low and behold there it was, in the chamber so as prophecy would have it you started packing the bowl, yet Jo was still standing in front of you, causing you to look up at her.

Jo looked down at you almost frightened causing you to smirk ‘can I light it for you ?’.

It was a question in a question, can I sit on you ? You knew that was what she was actually asking permission for because every time you came over, she would ask you that exact question, look uncomfortable while lighting it so you would ask her if being in your lap would be more comfortable for her. She’d say yes with no hesitation.

‘Hop on princess and light me up.’

Two face.

And she did what she was told, sitting across your legs, your left arm cupping her ass occasionally drumming your fingers on one of her cheeks. You brought the bong to your mouth as she went to light the weed up, sucking in, creating bubbles in the water encouraging the smoke to move through the water into your mouth, you felt it glide down your throat like a sailboat on calm seas as you inhaled it into your lungs, holding it there for a second then exhaling and emptying the bowl out on the floor for the girls to clean up later. You repeated these steps multiple times; pack it, light it, smoke it, dump it.

You felt a warmness creeping up on you, dispersing itself throughout your body, reminiscent of what it felt like to be on the verge of falling asleep as your eyesight began to flicker. The long-awaited high had finally arrived and now, your mind finally silenced itself as you felt your body sink itself into the couch.

You rested your eyes, focusing on the environment around you through smell, touch and taste. Jo’s soft, slim bodying pressing up against you while her hand went to play with your hair lulling you into bliss, her shampoo infiltrating your nose relaxing your body. The burn of the branded vodka as you skulled it down like water, heating up your insides like a bonfire.

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Wet kisses on your neck was occupied by an ‘I miss you’by Jo, sighing at the sensation it gave you, you tilted you head to the side giving her more access until,

‘No hickeys’.

Causing her to stop, earning her a ‘good girl from you’. Yet, you still hadn’t opened your eyes until now taking in her tinted cheeks and how her eyes had darkened significantly, you reached around to the back of her head to bring her closer to you so your lips could touch. There was no slow and sensual kiss, it was hot, fast and passionate, teeth grazing, nose bumping, constant moaning and grinding looking for any friction possible as your tongues infiltrated each other’s mouths like they were looking for treasure. Her lips pillowy yet slightly chapped, you could taste remnants of harsh liquor on her, yet you found yourself trying to drink as much of it as possible off her lips. Your hand slithering into and under Jo’s top to cup her tits and fidget with her harden nipples. You glanced over at Amber and despite all of the sounds you guys were making, Amber did not remove her focus off of the tv which played an ocean documentary, you not remembering when the channel changed.

Pulling away from the kiss, you move you lips to Jo’s ear giving it a quick swipe of your tongue ‘be a good girl for me and take of your pants and sit between my legs’, tapping her butt as she got up to follow your instructions.

As she sat between your legs on the couch you used both of your hands to run them over the tops of her thighs to reach her inner thigh so you could pull them a part making her knees rest on top of your thighs leaving her ankles barely hovering above the ground, ensuring that her sheerly covered cunt – for the time being – was exposed to anyone who dared to walk into the living room. Jo’s hair was perfectly parted into two buns that sat atop of her head making it easier to latch your mouth onto her neck while you kneaded the smooth flesh around her hot and achy core which you swore you could feel heat radiating from between her legs. Your mouth finding her pulse, you began to suck causing her to softly whimper, leaving your mark on her.

Using your hand, you lightly ran your fingers up and down the thin fabric covering Jo’s pussy almost like you were patting it, ‘wow already that wet that it is soaking your panties ? Just from kissing ? What a needy little slut you are’.

Feeling her pussy clench against your hand in response, you smirk ‘you know baby, you need to use your words, let me help you, okay ?’

Not caring enough to wait for her to respond you continue ‘repeat after me, my wet pussy needs your finger in it so you can make me cum’.

Doing as she was told; she responded her tone shaky ‘my wet pussy really needs your fingers so I can cum’.

You smile proudly at how well you taught her as you go to kiss her cheek ‘you are such a good girl; I am going to make sure that, that cunt of yours will be satisfied by my fingers’.

Moving her panties to the side, you dip your middle finger in between her cunt lips causing her to lean into you, her ass brushing against your pussy causing you to jolt forward due to the much-wanted friction as she rested her head on your shoulder. This movement allowing you to clearly see her puffy and glistening lips almost making your mouth water. You use you middle finger to spread around her slick that rested at her hole all around her labia, barely grazing her now stiffen clit, earning a low mewl from her as she tried to roll her hips against your hand. Not trying to stop her from her desperate attempts of getting some sort of relief, you continued to tease her, moving your finger to lazily play with her vaginal opening, you circle your finger around it occasionally, barely inserting your digit into her causing her pussy to flutter with anticipation pushing more of her juices down coating your finger.

Finally, you plunged two fingers into her, causing her to moan out of shock, luckily due to her high arousal state her pussy had relaxed enough to easily accommodate your fingers. You kept thrusting your fingers in and out of her wet cunt which filled the room with lewd noises sometimes inserting your fingers so deep into her that your knuckles would rest against her puffy lips, to push your fingers downward to stretch her so you could fit a third finger in. Every time you did that, her moans would louden while her pussy would clench around you, once you got the third finger in you decided it was time to focus on her g-spot by firmly brushing the pads of your fingers against the top wall, feeling her wetness drip down the palm of your hand.

Hearing a moan that was not Jo’s, you pull your eyes from where your fingers delved into Jo’s cunt to look at the only person in the room, Amber, to find that her hand was in her pants playing with herself at the sight of you fingering Jo.

Your voice was filled with lust as you ordered Amber to ‘come here and play with yourself on this couch, I don’t want you to feel left out’.

She followed your order, her eyes not moving away from Jo’s filled cunt, you looked at Amber, ‘before you sit down, let me get a taste’, as you moved your eyes to her shiny fingers.

Amber did as you asked, your tongue rolling around the two digits in your mouth causing her to moan, pulling back you flash her a lustful smile, ‘sluts always taste so good’, signally to her you were done for now, she sat down and continued to play with herself.

Using your spare hand that was used to hold Jo’s thigh in place, you begin to play with her clit, no teasing instead going straight to the point of wanting to make her cum, rubbing the bud up and down, left to right and round and round in circles. Your handy work causing Jo’s breathing to become erratic due to the overstimulation of her pussy being stretched open and her clit being played with.

While your hands were occupied with Jo, your mouth became occupied with Amber’s. The kiss was wet and heavy as Amber was constantly moaning into your mouth as the feeling of your lips on her and your tongue invading her mouth helped in conjuring dirty images of you. This pushing her over the edge, cumming around her fingers as she began heavily moaning into your mouth but not pulling away from the kiss.

Your core ached with need as you had two beautiful women around you lustfully moaning and as if Amber had noticed your neediness, she put her hand under your skirt only for you to hear her mutter into your mouth ‘no panties’. The rough pad of her finger began toying with your clit causing you to groan and thrust into her hand while you could feel the tension in your lower tummy slowly building. The roughness of her pad felt amazing as it helped to alleviate the hunger that formed from neglecting your desires.

Feeling Jo’s pussy clenching more and more frequently around your fingers, you knew she was close, so you fastened your pace on her clit so she could hurry up and get off and as you hoped she came violently, her hips jerking up while you could see her legs start to shake, her moans and sobs loud enough that the whole street what know what just took place. She went limp in your arms almost knocking Amber’s hand.

Feeling frustrated at Jo for almost making Amber stop, you move your lips to her ear and mutter harshly, ‘get off’, and she did, shakily getting up Jo moved to the other couch.

And Amber took the opportunity to warm the spot Jo had left empty, still keeping her fingers on your clit and mouth on yours she moved into your lap to straddle you. The vibrations of her moans in your mouth sent shock after shock straight down to your tummy almost breaking the dam that tried to stop your tension from reaching climax. In order to illustrate your need, you started grinding into her hand at a faster pace so she would go faster but she did not get it.

‘Finger me’.

‘Huh’.

‘Just do it’.

Slipping her two fingers into your wet cunt she started to stroke your g-spot, sending jolts to your clit making you eerily close to cumming however, to compensate for the lack of attention she was giving your clit you took it into your own hands. All the different sensations you were experiencing all over your body started to blend into one overwhelming explosive sensation causing your eyes to roll back to help hold onto this feeling for as long as possible, a habit that you always tended to do when you orgasmed.

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After regaining your strength and remembering the real reason you were here you turned to look at Amber who had moved to sit beside you, staring off in space while Jo was messing around with the remote, ‘where’s Ignacio ?’.

‘Last time I heard, he was in the study’.

Getting up you leave them to search for your man yet, something happened to your insides as you gave the girls one last glance at their state before you left them for Ignacio, nonetheless you choose to ignore it.

♡♡♡♡♡♡♡♡♡♡♡♡♡♡♡♡♡♡♡♡♡♡♡♡♡♡♡♡♡

thank you so much for reading this part and feedback is always welcomed !!!!!

and as always have an awesome saucesome day/night（づ￣3￣）づ╭❤～

resources: Directory of non-governmental organizations working in drug demand reduction, unodc.org, 1999 so it is quite old unfortunately but all continents are covered Drugs contacts, health.gov, 2019 Useful links, health.nsw, 2022 Organisations, drugpolicy.org

#breaking bad #brba #better call saul x reader #better call saul #smut #fanfic #angst #nacho varga x reader #ignacio varga x reader #the weeknd #michael mando #ignacio varga #nacho varga #bcs spoilers #amber x jo x reader #brbabcs #bcs

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cosmica-candy · 2 years

Text

How Narinder can be a good friend but same time salvage.

Pre-relationship LambxSozo

[Sozo is staring at Lamb as they walk out of cult. Narinder is smirking at him. A few seconds after Lamb leaves, Sozo notices Narinder]

Sozo: Why are you smiling like that? You look suspiciously like the cat who swallowed the canary.

Narinder: Despite being a cat I don't eat canary.

Sozo: You know it is just expression, but that’s not Sozo's point. Sozo's point is why are you smirking?

Narinder (chuckles): You were watching Lamb . With great interest, I might add. In fact, I believe you were… enraptured.

Sozo clearly embarrassed , he makes up an excuse: The Lamb is the leader , I was looking for guidance!!

Narinder,smiking more: Oh, I see. So what guidance did you learn in those swaying hips, hmm?

Sozo: No no no, I wasn’t looking at… you know, his… hindquarters. [He blushes just from mentioning Lamb’s “hindquarters,” and he avoids Narinder's stare.]

Narinder: Yeahh...

Sozo: Sozo gazed… Sozo means, glanced in that direction, maybe, but he wasn’t staring…or really seeing anything even. [he looks on floor for hinding his blushing]

Narinder: (smirking and clearly not believing him): Of course.

Sozo (scowling): Sozo hates you. You’re a bad person.

Beginning of relantionship between Sozo and Lamb.

Narinder: Lamb, can I tell you something?

Lamb: Of course, anything for my best friend!

Narinder: You and Sozo are inseparable these days. Like a crown and princess.

Lamb brushing and tries to minimize: It is not like that! Don't you think?

Narinder smiles sweetly before smiking like Cheshire Cat : Well then, now that you’re in an intimate relationship, you should learn about where babies really come from.

Lamb: What?!

Narinder : I know Old Faith says you pray about your babies to Heket and if you give to her satisfying tribute ,she creates your babies and give to you…but that’s not true. Actually what happens is a special ritual between two lovers...

Lamb: Red Crow Flame! I know where babies come from!

Narinder,faking suprise: Do you? Do you really?

Lamb: I certainly hope so.

Narinder : Oh, all right then. Aww, look, you’re all red and mottled. How cute.

Lamb: You did that on purpose!

Narinder faking innocence: Now, now Lamb, why would I do such a thing?

Lamb, pissed and emberrassed: Because you’re wicked. That friendly ,redeem DILF act? I’m so not fooled. I’m on to you now!

Narinder to Sozo: I think you make them very happy.

Sozo who was teasing by Narinder for mounths : Not this again! Sozo is ready this time!

Narinder: I just wanted to say that this is something good for them. Being a crown bearer isn't easy,and often lonely without somebody who can share your bunder. And if you find somebody they aren't going to live forever or you end up for fighting for power. I'm glad they found you, Sozo.

Sozo,distrustful : Oh,yes, Sozo bets you are, indeed. And...?

Narinder: That's all I hat to say.

Sozo, suprised: Really? No teasing? No making Sozo blushes?

Narinder: Of course not. I find your company bearable.You deserve to be happy.

Sozo,not believing it ends up so easly: Not ever a dig?

I hope make you smile! The source is dragon age origins

🗿🗿🗿🗿🗿🗿🗿🗿🗿🗿🗿🗿🗿🗿

AJAHDHAJSNSNA THIS IS SO SILLY I LOVE IT AKDJDHSHAJSHDB THANK YOU

#submission #cotl #cult of the lamb

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muse-kotori · 4 months

Text

Prompt #2423 (Random?)

“Come on now—I just want to hear you say it.”

I looked up with hazy vision, but put everything I could to steel my gaze. “I want you dead.”

“There we go. There’s that passion!”

ENTROPY V. CREATION—Round ???

“Come on now—I just want to hear you say it.”

I looked up with hazy vision, but put everything I could to steel my gaze. “I want you dead.”

“There we go. There’s that passion!”

I watched as this abomination strutted around like he won. Like there wasn’t any way for him to lose. We had been at this for so long, he had encroached on every part of my life like the disease he was. He made it very known that he wouldn’t be going anywhere, that he would haunt me for the rest of my days and take everything from me.

“Why?” I don’t know. I didn’t even know him that well when he first showed up. I was young, naive. He had talked to me with words full of milk and honey, and it was impossible to resist because to me, he was a friend. He was someone I could go to when nothing seemed to work. He had listened. And yet, as I grew older and realized that he was more of a hindrance than a help—everything changed—and he knew it. With that known to both of us, the war began in earnest with him not holding back for anything.

He was sneaky, sometimes underhanded. But there were times where he seemed truly concerned. When I was on the verge of breaking down, he tried to keep me in some kind of path or direction. It fueled my powers, but also gave him more leverage since he knew the source and weakness of each new growth. I never knew why. And when I asked why he chose me?

“Because you’re interesting. I never met someone as determined as you. I want to see where this story ends. Don’t you?”

His voice echoed in the amphitheater where we had fought. It was one of the few places where we were equals in strength. Where it was a battle of wills and he had dealt quite the blow earlier. Instead of finishing me off like every other villain, he let me struggle. Watching like a spider would be a bug in their web. I tried to catch my breath. Get my thoughts in order, watching as the dark blue of my aura flickers around me. The way he seemed unperturbed angered me.

“I mean, you always were able to tell how it would end. To the finest detail. You would act out both roles so easily—as one would be able to as the Creator. It was always entertaining and never boring.”

I was on my knees now, my arms shaking as I looked down at my bruised and cut hands, barely able to hold any weapons as they slowly healed from the damage they took. My feathery hair covered my face from view, the masses I felt in my back moving restlessly, matching my mood and thoughts perfectly, yet unable to leave. I grit my teeth as I snarled curses under my breath.

“I remember quite well the dance we did in the Chaos Saga. Do you remember?”

I did, begrudgingly. It was one of my most powerful and longest stints before that too was just another memory. The ending to it was satisfactory if the build up to it wasn’t so difficult to construct. The framework and foundation in the beginning was sound. The ending was made—a battle to liberate the nation under a tyrant as the true heiress took the throne from her father. Watching as he crumbled to dust from his own power and she stood victorious, watching as the man she could’ve had as a father in her life was taken away from her just like he took everything else. The curse of wielding the power that corrupts absolutely—nothing is sacred, nothing is exempt.

“But unlike their tale, ours is still going. The ending is as unpredictable as ever and that is something I will cherish long after. But first, we have to get there,” his poor imitation of a smile was too wide, like the Cheshire cat. The fact that I thought of it once as goofy if not endearing and friendly shows just how dangerous he was if he continued as he was. I had to stop him. I had to make sure that he could never harm anyone like he was doing me. No one deserved this. I don’t deserve this.

“Now what’s the gloomy gloom, hm?” his footsteps danced closer to me, stopping a foot away like he always did when we met up. He never let me touch him. “Have you reached a conclusion? Is our game over with me the victor?” he gasped in surprise. “Is our never ending chain of wonderful creation and destruction ca-put?!”

The blue that never left me, that which I managed to separate from his web with barely any ideas of my own, burned just a smidge brighter as he kept talking. A never ending chain, huh? The thought continued, something strong. Something that could and would never be defeated so easily. Something that had something to fall back on. The most powerful number in magic would be three, and three is the meaning of many things in life—life, death, rebirth; morning, day, and night; and most importantly, beginning, middle, and end.

A roar met my ears, lyrical in nature. My very being pulsed. My mind felt clearer. My body healed and was stronger than ever as a new surge of power unlocked. The scramble of footsteps let me know that he had moved back, cautious. I let a smirk appear on my face as forms began to form in my mind's eye, soon to come into fruition at my command.

“What is this? What are you doing?” He seemed scared. He was right to be. Never before had something so strongly come from me. Something that formed so quickly with failsafes. With detail. With knowledge and interest in things thought long gone.

“Me? Well, I was just getting my second wind,” I answered, smugness in my tone now. “You see, I always focused on one thing and that was it, only for it to get sidetracked, by you. I would then have to scrap and forget about it. But now, I have something that connects with each other. That brings everything I am, everything I’ve thought about, into perspective.”

I looked up at him, and I saw him step back, his void eyes shrinking in horror, the inky-shadowy mass that always followed and answered his beck and call swirl around him protectively, as if to shield him from what’s coming if it could.

“I would like to thank you for giving me the opportunity to introduce you to the new players in this game we play,”

To my left, my own blue ink formed into a cloaked figure, her hood covering her head, forming a cowl that was not unlike a bird. She moved her arms, revealing her body clad in a school uniform-like battlesuit, a book floating in front of her as a ring on a string hung from her neck. Her eyes glowed, ready to cast spells at a moment's notice. “The Keeper of Magic, the Witchlight,”

To my right, the ink lightened to a neon pink, the whirring of gears and hummings of energy could be heard and felt as the form appeared. Floating, arms poised and ready to strike, long tendrils—like arms—formed from behind her as her hair blew in the wind. Her own glowing eyes were sharp as she looked at her opponent, calculating his every move. “The messenger of all depraved souls, Envoy,”

And from behind me, like the sun’s glow, she appeared—strong, regal, and just as fierce as her companions. She was intimidating yet she didn’t seem like it. She wore clothes from a bygone era, an urumi at her side, hand on the hilt as the flexible blade cooled around her much like the creature she mounted. She was crouched on no mere steed, if they were one at all. They filled her whole side of the theater, all coiled scale and muscle, poised to strike as they blew blistering steam from their nose. They roared again, announcing their presence. “And the fierce, radiant Tsunagari, the Binder of All Evil.”

I stood tall as my voice reverated in the space, louder than it has been in a long time if ever. My own cloak billowed as power radiated in and around me. I tightened the wraps around my wrists and hands, flexing and rotating them before ultimately shaking them out. I took a deep breath, my right hand coming to my left shoulder in a fist before I swiftly brought it down back to my side. In my hand, a sword that has seen many battles appeared in my hand. I brought it up to my face, eyes closed momentarily before they opened back up, glowing in their own power as I raised it up high. The music playing in my head at the moment came to a lull, as if waiting for my dramatic start to this new round, as long and tedious it would be…I had a good feeling about this.

“Now, Endymion, Lord of Entropy.” I said in mocking every time he coerced me into continuing this farce, “Let’s continue this song and dance with Lady Genesis, Lady of Creation—me.”

And done! Part 1! Ask me about it, help with editing, or whatever! Be nice, be good! And I’ll see you next time!

Prompt source: @promptsforthestrugglingauthor

Also check out @unboundprompts! A lot of prompt stuff might come from there and so far her prompts helped me with some stuff for my other WIPs, even the ask box ones!

#my writing #prompt response #oc lore #tumblr sona

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londonalozzy · 3 years

Text

Stop Pretending (TFATWS)

Fandom: Marvel

Pairing: Bucky x Reader

Genre: Romance, Angst

Summary: The reader thinks she's doing a stellar job of keeping her feelings for a certain soldier buried deep inside. Turns out, all it takes is an observant new friend to begin the unraveling of her most precious secret (Spoilers for TFATWS)

Masterlist

Word: Pretence

Definition: A way of acting that is intended to deceive people.

Example: Saying that he's just a friend when he's really the love of your life.

Your POV

Being caught in the midst of war is something that I, (Y/N) (Y/L/N) know all too well. As a war vet, former shield agent, and now Avenger I'm used to being centered amongst conflict. When the fight begins within me though, a battle between what I want and what I think is right, how will I react? Will I listen to my heart, my head, or will the winner be chosen for me?

Delacroix, Louisiana.....

I love my sleep, always have, always will. It's not necessarily the comfort of the bed, the quiet or even the rest. It's the fact that I'm at peace when I sleep. My life has a tendency to fall apart when I'm awake, so anything that will put that off for as long as possible I savor.

I wish it were the same for a certain super soldier in my life. I look forward to going to bed, everything calms down then, and for most people it's the same. For Bucky however, it's when everything starts, the nightmares, the terrors, the seemingly unending darkness. If only I could take his pain away like he has with mine.

For the last few weeks, my life had, for want of a better word, been hectic. Hectic to say the least.

After the eventual defeat of Thanos and the loses we endured as a result, I thought naively that life might calm down a bit, that I'd have time to breathe, to live. How wrong I was.

It all began with John Walker being announced to the world as the new Captain America.

I was baking cookies with Morgan in the Stark family kitchen when it came over the radio. As that latest turn of events sunk in, my first thoughts were of Bucky, what that would do to him. Not even an hour later I had said my goodbyes and was on my way to help him get the shield back.

Since then even more had happened. We'd regrouped with Sam, busted Zemo out of prison which in turn ruffled the feathers of Ayo and the Dora Milaje. We came face to face with Morgenthou and the Flag Smashers, and finally witnessed the man who thought he could even compete with Steve, make himself judge, jury and most significantly executioner.

After that went around the world we knew we had to end it sooner rather than later. It couldn't get much worse than Captain America becoming a murderer. We got the shield back, which was a fight all in itself. Handed Zemo over to Ayo, to try and recompense for the distrust we'd instilled in the people who'd helped us so much. Then we travelled to stay with Sam and his family in Louisiana whilst we waited for Karli's next move.

This is where we found ourselves now, in the eye of it, the calm before the storm.

Waking up in the Wilson households guest room, I was greeted to the golden hue of the rising sun penetrating through the single glaze windows, and the melodic sounds of gulls on the hunt for their morning meal down by the docks.

Actually, no that's not right. What I could hear was most certainly not birds, and it was definitely not melodic. What were those boys doing?

Quickly and quietly I threw on the first clothes I could get my hands on and made my way downstairs towards the noise. What caught my attention when I discovered the source, was not the two youngest Wilson boys playing with our newly reacquired shield in the living room, but the super solider who was blissfully ignorant to it all, sleeping peacefully on the couch in front of them. I don't think I'd ever been so happy.

"Right you two, if you're determined to play Avengers all morning then I suggest you re-assemble in the back yard. You're gonna wake Bucky up," I whispered out in one breath, stepping between the boys, then placing my hands on their backs and tip toeing them towards the door.

"So what if we wake him up? It's gone 10am," Cass questioned in protest, pulling on his sneakers and jacket.

"Exactly! Which is why if you do as I say, I will make you the biggest plate of waffles for breakfast that you've ever seen."

The boys eyes lit up. "Can we have ice cream with it? Mum never lets us have ice cream for breakfast, and I'm sure there's a tub of Stark raving hazelnuts in the freezer," AJ clapped in muted excitement. "Oh, for God's sake.....Yes. You can have whatever you want if you get out of this house now and keep the noise down."

Once the boys were outside, I made my way over to the kitchen, stopping on the way to lean over my favourite senior citizen and make sure that he was still peaceful in his slumber. He'd never looked so relaxed, so at ease. It was a brand new Bucky I'd never seen before, a Bucky that had my heart pounding for him even more than it normally did. Not that he knew any of that.

Half an hour later and up to my elbows in waffle mix, I failed to notice my new friend and host Sarah making her way to my side at the counter, the huge smile on my face not going unnoticed. "What's got you grinning like the Cheshire cat, like I need to ask?"

"Bucky's sleeping. Isn't it amazing?" I spoke softly, bouncing up and down on my feet as I did so.

"And why is that?" She couldn't looked more confused if she tried.

"In all the years I've known him, I don't think I've ever woken up before he has. If his nightmares don't keep him awake all night, they normally have him up before the crack of dawn. I don't think I've ever seen him so still."

"Good answer," Sarah nodded in a hush, understanding why this meant so much to me, but not done yet with her morning interrogations, "Now on to my next question......"

"I'm already not liking the sound of this."

"Sleeping Beauty over there follows you around like a little puppy dog. He hangs on your every word, looks at you like you hung the stars or something. It's pretty obvious how crazy he is about you, so when are you gonna stop pretending that you're not head over heels in love with him?"

"I don't know what you're talking about Wilson," I smiled forcefully, making out like the waffle maker deserved my attention way more than the conversation I was being made to have.

This was all Sam's doing, without a shadow of a doubt. He'd tried to have this conversation with me on multiple occasions and I shut him down every time. He obviously hadn't given up like I thought he did, and decided to draft in his sister. He is seriously gonna regret it when I find him.

"Sure you know what I'm talking about. Sam sees it, I don't even know you that well and I see it. The only reason Bucky doesn't, is because he doesn't believe he could ever be that lucky. You're a smitten kitten." These Wilson's are all as annoying as each other.

Knowing I wasn't getting out of this one, I grabbed Sarah by the arm and pulled her right into the corner of the room, trying my best to keep this convo as private as possible. "Look, I'm not pretending.....I'm ignoring. There's a difference."

"Care to explain what that difference is?" Sarah spoke softly, but with a sarcastic air.

Turning to look over my shoulder at the subject of our conversation, making sure he was still safely in the land of nod, I decided to just be honest. Sarah was much like her brother. Once she wanted to get to the bottom of something she wasn't about to give up.

"I love Bucky, more than I've ever loved anyone...and that terrifies me," the rawness of finally being honest making my voice shake, and tears come to my eyes. "Nat was like my sister, and she's dead. Tony was the closest I've ever gotten to having a Dad...and he's dead too. Then there's Steve, Vision, God knows where Wanda is....Everyone I love, either leaves or dies. If I admit my feelings for Buck then I face the risk of losing him too."

"Do you have any idea how crazy you sound right now? He's not going to die because you love him (Y/N)."

Silent tears were falling now. I was revealing my deepest fears to a woman I'd only known a few days, and I'm not underplaying it when I say it was like a colossal weight off my chest, a release I didn't know I needed. "Believe me...I know, but I can't take that risk. I can't lose anyone else, especially not him."

"Let's just say for a second that you're right, that there is some higher power somewhere, set on destroying everyone you love. Do you really think ignoring your feelings is going to make them disappear?" I didn't know what to say to that. "Natasha and Stark died so that everyone could continue living, and (Y/N) you're not living as long as you keep this to yourself. They wouldn't want that for you."

"But what if I lose him?" I whispered with a choked sigh.

"Then at least he'll die knowing how you felt about him. After everything he's been through don't you think he deserves to know there's someone out there who loves him like you do?"

"Of course..."

Sarah's lips pulled upwards in a satisfied smirk, wrapping her arm around my shoulder and giving it a comforting squeeze, "then you owe it to yourself, and to him, to tell him the truth."

"Why do all you Wilson's have to be so clever?" I voiced in mock irritation, pushing her away from me and acting like I was annoyed she had gotten one up on me.

"I don't know," she thought aloud and with a cheeky grin, grabbing a plate to start piling on the long forgotten waffles, "I think it might be the sea air or something."

"Nah, it's in the genes," I chuckled quietly, grabbing my jacket and deciding it was time to get this conversation wrapped up. "I'll go find Sam and the boys for breakfast. Clear my head a little bit."

"You promise you're gonna tell him?" Sarah stopped me as I went to push the door open.

"I'll think about it."

3rd person POV

Once (Y/N) was out of ear shot, Sarah couldn't help but start jumping up and down in excitement, clapping her hands loudly as she did so. That went even better than she thought it would, and she was so proud of herself. Sarah Wilson could now add matchmaker to her resume.

"Coast is clear Barnes. You can open your eyes now."

(Y/N) had no idea what she had metaphorically walked into just minutes earlier, entering that very revealing conversation with her overly inquisitive host.

What drew Sarah to come down that morning was the sounds of both the front porch door opening and the smell of homemade waffles wafting up the stairs. As she entered the kitchen she was met with two sights. One being (Y/N), facing the counter and looking very smiley, the other being a wide awake super soldier who was just laying on the couch and staring at her, the sole object of his affection. Sarah could work with this.

Every time (Y/N) turned back in his direction, Bucky would close his eyes and pretend to be asleep again. He had never slept so soundly, so peacefully, thoughts of (Y/N) and his new friends filling his nightmare free dreams.

He'd initially woken to (Y/N) ushering the boys outside because she was afraid they would wake him up. He didn't want to disappoint her by proving her right. Besides, he liked just watching her move around the kitchen, completely unaware he was observing her the whole time. He had no idea about the conversation that was just about to happen.

After (Y/N) had left and Sarah had confirmed so, Bucky sat himself up, his body shaking with adrenaline and a look of complete shock fixed on his face. Had he definitely woken up, or had the whole thing been a part of his dream? Did (Y/N) seriously just admit that she was in love with him?

Bucky didn't know how to react, didn't know what to say as he looked up at a smug Sarah from his spot. All he'd ever wanted was for (Y/N) to feel the same way about him as he did about her. Now he knew that she did.

"You're welcome by the way."

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fanimesenseiwrites · 3 years

Note

Ok, I know I just gave you a request before this, but I actually would love to see how the brothers + the Angels (and the Succubi 😏😂) react to an MC that ACTUALLY HAS BDE, and is a total fucking Dom down to their core (No submitting for this bitch, they literally can’t without being severely uncomfortable and that’s not sexy at all 😤)

I really love this idea so much actually.

And it's not that I love this one more than your other one, but this one felt a little easier to write to me.

NSFW-ish : nothing explicit but mentions of bdsm and sexy times

Everyone's Reaction to a Dominant MC:

Lucifer:

Before he comes to like the MC he HATES their dominant personality.

To him it comes off as defiant and bossy (talk about the pot calling the kettle black)

But after he gets to know the MC and grows to love them, he finds it incredibly attractive

The problem is that, he's normally the dom...

He's a bit conflicted.

MC doesn't like being dominated at all and he's only into it every once in a blue moon

So they end up being more of kindred spirits, and exchange "advice" about dominating their partners

Mammon:

He thinks the MC is kinda bossy, which he'll say he doesn't like, but he actually kinda likes it...?

But when MC praises him? That's what he really likes.

He'll do anything if MC will praise him for it

It doesn't even have to be sexual, he'd stop stealing if MC calls him "my good boy"

Well, he says he would. He can't help himself sometimes...

But if MC doles out the punishment? He won't even run.

He can't quite figure it out, (he's a fucking sub he just won't admit it) but it's not so bad when MC punishes him. And it's not because MC goes easy on him.

Leviathan:

Both him and the MC are in for a bit of a surprise when they're getting onto him about his messy room one day

It's really not unusual for his room to be messy. But for whatever reason, MC is really upset about it today.

"... you lazy, pathetic shut-in...!"

"Ah... don't stop..." Levi whines.

MC is taken off guard at first, even blushes a little. "Wait... so you want me to call you names?"

Levi goes red as a cherry. "Y-yeah... I mean, if you want to..."

MC grins. "So you want me tell you how pitiful and filthy you are?" They run their hands over his shoulders teasingly.

Levi nods. Did he get even redder??

MC grins mischievously. "Okay... but you gotta clean your room first."

Levi frowns. "Wait..."

"Do it or I'll compliment you."

"Don't..." he begs softly.

"Levi, you're so smart and handsome and good at video games..." MC teases.

"No! O. M. G. Shut up!" He immediately starts cleaning up.

MC is grinning like the Cheshire Cat after figuring it all out.

Satan:

Satan only likes MC's dominant side when they turn it on Lucifer. He just finds it entertaining as hell.

But he absolutely does not like it when it gets turned on him though. Because, well...

They remind him of Lucifer when they're like that.

Also, he tends to be more of a dominant personality himself so...

MC will be nice and not act like that with Satan, but they can really just be friends in that case

Asmodeus:

MC being dominant is really really sexy to him

Asmo isn't so much of sub as much as he'll kinda just do whatever to get off

But Asmo is definitely bratty, he thinks it makes it more fun if MC has to work for what they want

MC doesn't mind so much, they like to play too

They're also an excellent brat tamer 😏

Beelzebub:

Beel doesn't mind MC being dominant if that's what they like

He really does prefer them being on top anyways

MC can't bring themself to do anything crazy with Beel though because he's just such a good boy

They'd feel bad even if Beel says he's cool with it

And he really is cool with it, he's really chill as long as they communicate

(Which you should be doing anyways!)

Belphegor:

This man is the definition of brat energy.

It's just so much easier to not do something than to do whatever MC wants them to do

Belphie is a little torn about how he feels about MC being so dominant

On the one hand, he loves fucking with them and he likes that MC wants to do all the work more or less

But on the other hand, they get pushy and bossy and then they remind him of Lucifer

Definitely not sexy to think about your older brother, whether you like him or not

Diavolo:

Ya know those CEOs, etc that spend all day being in charge and so every once in a while they just wanna let go and be dominated? Yeah, that's definitely our crown prince

He's such an obedient little sub, he'll do anything the MC tells him to do, he's just so happy to not be in charge for once

MC is really good about being respectful to Diavolo in front of folks, but as soon as that bedroom door closes... 😏

Barbatos:

He loves MC being dominant as long as it's being used for keeping the brothers in line or helping Lord Diavolo relax...

But when MC is dominant towards him... ehh....

He's really more of a switch himself, and even then he's not into anything... hardcore.

While he doesn't hold the same status as Lord Diavolo, he still is a person who is very much in control and sometimes he needs to let go and relax

But he also likes being in control.

So if he can't ever dominate MC, he's more than happy to just be friends with them

Solomon:

Solomon is... an interesting case.

We all know this man radiates brat energy. Like all day long. To everyone.

And MC kinda loves it, but they also hate it.

At this point in his life, Solomon finds having power kinda... meh

I mean, when you were once a king and have been the most powerful sorcerer, at some point having power just isn't interesting

So he likes playing the part of the (bratty) sub

But its Solomon, and he likes to push the envelope...

He tried to do something domineering with MC ONCE, and it caused him to be defenestrated.

Solomon is decidedly not a brat for a long time after that.

Simeon:

He finds it amusing how the MC bosses the brothers around so easily

But when they want to do... things with him, he's a little unsure.

It's not new territory for him in terms of knowledge, but it is in terms of practice.

MC is fascinated by the idea of dominating an angel. In a way, it feels like they're corrupting him.

Well, Simeon's willing to try (almost) anything once.

MC is gentle with Simeon, even if their words aren't

Simeon actually likes it. And he'll never be into impact play but he enjoys being tied up.

Luke:

Luke is LIVING for MC bossing the brothers around.

It's only what they deserve (so he thinks)

But sometimes, MC will say something bossy and their voice sounds different, lower...

Then Simeon covers his ears.

He doesn't know why Simeon keeps doing that. He really wants to hear MC boss the brothers around...

Succubi:

They're astounded. They're in awe. They're horny af watching MC boss the brothers around.

They talk amongst each other about MC so much.

"Do you think they're really a dom or are they just bossy?"

"Do you think the brothers like it or is MC just like this all the time?"

"... do you think they'd... with me?"

They all think that. They all hope for that.

And they really really wanna ask but... well they're all subs, god demon king bless them.

A couple of them get the courage to ask but then they get nervous during the execution and MC is not exactly the sharpest tack...

So MC literally has no idea how many demons want to fuck them....

Until Valentine's Day that is.

Dom MC is not easily overwhelmed. But the sheer amount of presents they get... and how many of them are from succubi that want to be dominated by them...

MC is really flattered but also wildly embarrassed. They lock themself in their room for a few days while they think of the best way to easily let down a bunch of horny succubi.

It goes better than one would expect saying "no" to a bunch of demons would... but it is not without disappointment and more embarrassment.

MC locks themself away again after having to do all that.

MC will be okay, but they might need some mental aftercare from their favorite boy afterwards

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gale-gentlepenguin · 3 years

Text

ML Ficlet: Nothing changed

It was unnaturally cold for this time of year. That is what the crimson heroine thought to herself as she dashed across the rooftops in the city of love.

She landed on the roof that was their usual meet up point.

"Just in time My Lady." Chat noir purred. "Looks like you are keeping your promise about not missing our patrols."

Ladybug wished she could be in a happier mood. She was questioning whether she should even tell him about what she did.

"Ladybug? You in there?" Chat noir inquired. "I called you my Lady again and you didn't correct me?"

His question snapped Ladybug back to the present.

"Huh? Oh, right sorry." She apologized.

"A lot on your mind?"

"You could say that."

"Do you want to talk about it? Or is it guardian stuff?"

Ladybug decided she would tell him after patrol tonight, she didn't want the mood to be soured over this.

She takes his hand.

"We can talk later. But first, Paris needs protecting." She smiled sweetly. The cat felt a faint blush on his cheeks. But the feeling faded when he realized she had taken off.

"Oh! So thats how you want to play." Chat noir smiled.

The two teens patrolled the city from above. They made sure to protect several food stands... in case an akuma was Hangry. Making time to take photos. They even comforted a girl after a bad date, preventing an akuma in the making.

It had been awhile since Chat noir was able to enjoy a patrol with Ladybug like this. She wasn't so high strung trying to force herself to have fun or so quick to get out. It was like nothing had changed. Perhaps Ladybug had finally found a good balance, he hoped that was the case.

Though as soon as it started, the patrol was at an end. Chat noir wishing it could have went on forever.

"Well sadly while the night is young, we must part." Chat noir acted out like a thespian. Using over dramatic hand gestures to exemplify his 'Heartbreak.'

"Silly kitty." Ladybug let out a sigh and light giggle. Oh how it was music to his ears.

"Well good night bugaboo. I will dream of you." He teased.

Ladybug's expression went grim.

"Wait a second."

Chat noir stopped himself from leaping.

"Yes My... yes Ladybug?"

Chat noir could tell that the mood had shifted. He had gotten better at reading her emotions and it was clear she was going to say something serious. He put away the mental clown nose.

"I... I need to tell you something important." Ladybug spoke. Her words holding much more weight with each passing second.

"Look Ladybug... if this is too much you don't have to tell me. I know that..."

"No, I need to tell you this. Even if it hurts." Ladybug interrupted. Her voice shook in that moment.

The air blew much colder to the cat.

"Okay, what is it?"

Chat noir prepared for some sort of verbal punch. Whatever it was, he was sure he could take it.

"I told someone my identity."

He was wrong. It was like he had the air knocked out of him. That couldn't be right. There was no way she would.... right?

"I'm sorry Ladybug. I think I must of misheard what you said. Cause it sounded like you said you told someone your secret identity." He tried to make light of it. His body shaking as he forced a Cheshire grin.

"You didn't. I told someone who I am under the mask."

His heart felt like it was dropped off the roof of the building they were standing on.

"You mean someone forced you to tell them? Cause we can track them down and fix it."

"I told someone, of my own free will, who I am. I know that comes as a shock. You are right to feel mad."

The cat hero looked at her, his expression became unreadable.

"Mad? You think I would be mad about this?" His voice trying to so hard to maintain calm when every part of his heart feels like he is being stabbed. "I am hurt, that you would think that."

"It wasn't something I did to hurt you. I just felt the pressure of everything... and I couldn't.... I couldn't bear it alone." Ladybug answered. She was not happy with this. She knew chat noir would feel hurt, but she never expected this.

Chat noir took a deep breath. He would ease himself. He needed to be rational. Ladybug was being honest with him. She could have just kept it from him. He needed to understand how hurt she must feel about all of this. Even if this felt like his heart was being dissected, he would not make Ladybug feel worse about this. He would try to be understanding.

"Okay... I understand. Fu had Marianne. Its okay that you would tell someone."

Ladybug eased a bit, the cat seemed to be coming around.

"It wasn't something I wanted to do. I know how much this must sting hearing this."

This felt so condescending to the black cat. And that was the last straw.

"No. Not at all. I mean sure I want nothing more in life then to know who my closest friend and crime fighting partner is. And sure, I completely hated the rule with a passion that could rival the desire shadow moth has for our miraculous. But I stuck to it because, hey, it was for the sake of Paris and it made sure we could stay safe from the crazy super villain. It made sense, and even though I wanted to tell one person who I love who I am, I couldn't risk it. Even though it ruined the relationships I had, I endured. I did it because, Ladybug was counting on me. I did it because even though it was killing me internally, Ladybug was bearing the same burden! It was us against the world! I could endure it with her! I guess that was a lie too!"

Chat noir took a breath.

"Chatton..."

"Im not done." He snapped. His smile had vanished, showing a nasty snarl.

Ladybug felt herself step back. The ferocity of that statement triggered a long suppressed fear. Something she wished she would never see again. The reason why she didn't want him to find out her identity. She saw the anger of Chat Blanc.

Chat noir noticed the fear on ladybug's face, and the tears forming in her eyes. He had gone too far. His anger replaced with horror at what he had done.

"Wait... Ladybug... That was too far."

"No... you're right to be mad. I broke your trust. I forced you to agree to things you hated and then I broke the rule I set. I just... I couldn't take it. So I know I am being selfish to expect you to take it in stride. You don't deserve this. I would understand if you hate me and want to quit..."

Chat noir hugged her. Catching the red heroine off guard.

"This isn't your fault. Yes I'm mad. I am also hurt and feel betrayed... but I don't hate you."

"You don't?"

"I couldn't hate you Ladybug. Its not like I've been the perfect partner. I've screwed up too. But you still want me around right?" Chat noir answered.

"I don't think I could be ladybug without you."

Chat noir felt his emotions ease.

"And I couldn't be Chat noir without you."

He releases the hug.

They stood in silence for a few minutes. Both taking calming breaths. They wanted to ensure they were both able to continue talking without a potential akuma risk.

"So, you told someone because you needed someone to talk to because being the guardian along with other stuff was too much for you to handle quietly. " Chat noir asked calmly.

"Yes, that is what happened."

"It was better you told someone then just suffered alone. I wanted to be your support... but I understand that its dangerous right now if I know who you are and vice versa." Chat noir continued.

"I know its hard to accept..."

"No no, lets not try and ease it. I will accept it over time. I just want you to know that its okay that you did that. I want you to know that despite how much it hurt, I am glad you told me now. Finding this out... that might have hurt so much worse. It would have felt like nothing changed from back then."

Ladybug knew he was referring to how master fu had kept her from tell him about things. How he was left in the dark? She hated that period of her life.

"When this is over, when Hawkmoth is done. I swear we can reveal our identities to each other. We can even go catch a movie."

Chat noir smiled a bit.

"I would like that."

In the end, Chat noir was still hurt by this, but he knew how to take a bit of pain. He would move past it, he and Ladybug would still be partners. He still love her dearly. Nothing changed.

#ml #gang of secrets #ml spoilers #ml ficlet #hurt and comfort #miraculous ladybug #ladynoir #ladybug #chat noir #chat blanc mention #ml angst #ml season 4

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multi--kpop--fanfics · 3 years

Text

(Not) Such A Good Boy

sub!bf!Juyeon x dom!fem!reader (ft. Eric, Kevin and Hyunjae)

genre: smut, slight crack, a bit of fluff towards the end

contains: dom/sub themes, degradation, oral sex (f receiving), marking, biting, spanking, Juyeon is a brat on a choker and a leash, unprotected sex (be safe y’all)

Author’s note: This man right there has been wrecking my existence lately (I blame Kingdom) and this GIF screams sub!Juyeon so yeah, enjoy this filth

“Lee Juyeon, you’ve got to be fucking kidding me”, you scoff under your breath. You have been waiting for the past twenty minutes in the living room, outfit and makeup on point, since you were about to go clubbing with your group of friends. But apparently, your dear boyfriend had lost all sense of time, trying to get ready.

Visibly irritated, you storm to your shared bedroom, your heels angrily clicking on the wooden floor. “Juyeon, I swear to God-” you mutter and stop mid-sentence, only to see your boyfriend leaning on the door, fully dressed and a lop-sided smirk plastered on his handsome face.

“You called, babe?”, he asks teasingly and before rolling your eyes, you give him an once-over, processing his choice of clothes - a pair of tight black leather pants that were hugging his muscular thighs deliciously, a pair of black combat boots, a cropped black sweater with holes around his clavicles and a black belt-like choker around his neck. He was the epitome of the emo bad boy that all parents hated and all girls craved.

“Um, what is this?”, you question him with a pointing finger. "That, is my outfit for tonight", Juyeon states, the previous smirk still on his face, "What, you don't like it?". "Isn't it a bit unfair for me to wear not so revealing clothes all while you're dressed as an emo himbo?", you complain and he laughs, "An emo himbo? Wow, you're getting more creative with your descriptions, Y/N. You're right though, it's a sort of questionable outfit". You perk up at his response, hoping he'll change into something more colorful and less hole-adorned, only to be utterly disappointed, as Juyeon reached into the closet only to drape a black leather jacket on top of his broad shoulders. "Now we're good to go", he turns to you and winks with audacity. Brat, you scoff mentally and pick up the keys to unlock the door and finally leave your shared apartment.

"Finally! What the fuck took you so long?!", your friend Eric yells at you, trying to overcome the loud bass of the club speakers. "Your complaints to your friend over there, he was the one who took twenty minutes to get ready", you roll your eyes pointing to Juyeon, who was greeting Hyunjae and Kevin, your other friends. "Yooo, Juyeon, what's up with the collar, bro?", Eric amusingly points out. "It's a choker, you tasteless twat. But what would you know of fashion, since you only know how to wear t-shirts and ripped jeans?", Kevin comments and Juyeon mouths a 'thank you' to him. "Simple is the best, my dear friend. Besides, I've been getting all the girls, unlike you and your snake print jacket", Eric retaliates. "Excuse you, this jacket is a fashion statement!", Kevin bites back, feeling insulted. "Not gonna lie though, it does look like a collar. Will you put him on a leash too, Y/N?", Hyunjae comments in a snarky way, making Eric cringe in disgust. "Hyunjae, please go get some drinks, for God's sake", you reply with a dismissive manner. "Yes ma'am", he rolls his eyes and goes to the bartender.

You turn to Juyeon, who was extremely stiff after Hyunjae's comment. "You okay, baby?", you nudge him softly and he's brought back to reality. "Y-yeah, I'm fine, no worries", Juyeon replies, praying that the loud bass could cover his shaky voice. "Don't listen to Eric and Hyunjae, they have zero fashion sense, bro. I would wear that choker too, looks hella good on you", Kevin adds while pointing to the choker and Juyeon's smile is back on his face, "Thanks, bro, I really appreciate it", he replies with a chirpy tone.

The music suddenly changes into a slower jam and Juyeon smirks devilishly, as he winks at you and walks towards the dance floor. You watched as he starts swaying his hips and shoulders in the most smooth way possible, his half-lidded eyes never leaving yours. Eric and Kevin were whistling and cheering on Juyeon, all while Hyunjae was snorting at their antiques. You were simply lost in the image of your boyfriend dancing like there was no tomorrow. He wasn't just following the rhythm, he was riding it - and boy, was he good at doing so.

In fact, he was so good that he gained the attention of many people in the club. And you were lowkey proud, because that man was yours. However, a certain girl wasn't aware of that - hence why she approached Juyeon and started dancing with him. You were a bit jealous, not gonna lie, but the next moment made your blood fucking boil.

He had the fucking audacity to put his hands on her waist and dance with her - all while looking to you over her shoulder with the most smug expression on his face. That fucker, you mentally curse. This was definitely payback for everything you said before you left the house. You just knew it. You weren't even the jealous or possessive type of girlfriend to begin with.

But you'd be damned if you were to let a random bitch run her hands over your boyfriend.

Hyunjae catches up to your motions and he grabs you by your wrist. "Hyunjae, what the f-" "Shut up and listen to me. Going there and creating a scene will not end up well for you and you will give Juyeon exactly what he wants", he states and his words hit home faster that you expected. "Since when did you become so perceptive?", you raise an eyebrow and he chuckles, "I have my moments too, Y/N". "So, since your brain decided to actually function tonight, do you have any idea?" you ask in defeat and Hyunjae starts pulling you to the dance floor by your hand, leaving Eric and Kevin completely baffled. He then pulls you into his chest and leans in your ear to whisper

"Just dance, Y/N".

A Cheshire cat-like grin spreads on your lips, as you catch up to his ulterior motive and you start dancing with Hyunjae, hoping that Juyeon will notice the two of you. "Don't think too much about it, it will happen naturally", he adds, "You're too stiff, Y/N, just relax and enjoy dancing".

His words actually succeed in making you relax and you sway your hips more comfortably, actually enjoying the slow jams echoing through the club speakers. Under the dim lights, you lock eyes momentarily with Juyeon, who was licking his lips and his gaze was a mix of lust and death glares, the last one directed to Hyunjae. "Told you it would work", he comments, "You owe me this one". "Shut the fuck up, Hyunjae", you spit back and he laughs.

However, his laughter is cut short by a very jealous Juyeon, who has grabbed him by the collar of his shirt. "Next time I see you dance with Y/N, I'll break your fucking kneecaps", he growls and Hyunjae takes a step back, "She's all yours, bro", he raises his hands in defense and returns to the table. Juyeon then turns to you, his blood still boiling with jealousy, as you watch him with a proud smirk.

"You find this funny, huh? Dancing shamelessly with my friend?", he clenches his jaw. You then thread a finger through his choker and pull him close to your face, making Juyeon gasp. "Funny? No honey, I'm fucking fuming right now, because you decided to act like a brat and put your hands on the first bitch that threw herself on you", you retaliate, your chill facade slipping away. A sickly sweet smile adorns Juyeon's face as he watches every single movement of yours. He lowers his head, his lips hanging mere centimeters over yours and he slyly pokes out his tongue to lick your lips, hissing at the wet feeling.

"You're so fucking hot when you're mad, baby".

That was the last straw.

"Get your stuff, we're going home", you announce and he flashes a toothy grin. "Yes ma'am", he replies almost immediately and you return to your friends' table. "Guys, we'll be leaving now, hope you enjoy the rest of the night!" you announce and Eric looks between Juyeon and you. "Do I want to know what's going on?", he questions and Kevin pats him on the back while shaking his head as in 'no'. You both bid farewell to your friends and you walk out of the club, jogging towards your car. Juyeon whips out the cars keys and he opens the door for you, his gentleman-like gesture a complete contrast to his previous bratty behaviour.

The ride back home feels like it lasted for hours, when in reality, it lasted only ten minutes - maybe it's your sheer desire to fuck your handsome boyfriend to oblivion. By the time you entered your shared apartment, your lips were on Juyeon's neck, your hands roaming his toned body and his arms wrapped around your waist.

"You love acting like a bratty slut, don't you?", you sneer at him and he releases a breathy chuckle. "Yeah, and so do you", he whispers and he trails kisses upon your neck and behind your ear, nibbling your earlobe. "Are you going to punish me for being a bratty slut?".

You thought you came right there and then, 'cause fuck, he is so hot like this.

"Is that what you want? Fine then, you'll get the punishment you deserve, slut", you hiss while gripping Juyeon's jaw, your manicured nails raking his porcelain skin, "Don't say I didn't warn you", you whisper into his ear and he releases one of the lewdest sounds you've ever heard in your life. "God, you're a desperate little bitch, aren't you, Lee Juyeon?", you ask while removing the detachable strap of your bag and clasp it on his choker, creating a make-shift leash. "Only for you, baby", he replies with a sultry voice and half-lidded eyes.

You pull him by the make-shift leash, and you push him onto the couch, where you settle yourself on his lap, his hard cock straining his already tight pants. You remove his shirt, exposing his chiseled body. Wasting no time, you attack his collarbones with your lips, trailing red and purple blotches on his soft skin. You bite the juncture of his neck teasingly and he releases breathy moans, making you chuckle. You grind your clothed core on his bulge, and the sweet friction makes Juyeon mewl again. He tries to reach for your crotch with his hand, but you stop him by pulling the leash, making him gasp.

"No sweetheart, no touching tonight", you chastise him, as you pull back to remove your clothes and his pants, leaving the both of you only in your underwear. Juyeon's bulge is even more evident now, the thin material of his boxers having a wet spot, due to his cock leaking pre-cum. The sight in front of you makes your own wetness pool in your panties - your boyfriend on a leash, his perfectly styled hair now disheveled, his upper torso covered in love bites, his muscular thighs fully spread and his cock straining against his boxers.

"Baby, fuck, please do something", he pleads with bleary eyes. "Lie down for me", you order and he's laid flat on his back with one swift motion, his desperation showing. You remove your underwear and place your naked pussy right in front of his face. He reaches for your thighs with his arms, but you slap them away. "I said, no touching", you say sternly, "But-", "You should have thought twice before touching that bitch with your hands. Now, be a good boy and use your pretty mouth", you demand.

Juyeon pushes his wet tongue into your heat without second thought and he's lapping up your juices like a starved man. You can't help but moan with satisfaction, having him under your control like that gave you a huge adrenaline rush. You raked your nails from his torso to the hem of his boxers, the sensation making him moan and momentarily halt his actions. You slap his left thigh to alert him and his cock twitches, the vibrations of his moans coursing through your body as well. Juyeon now flattens his tongue against your folds with a faster tempo.

"You like it when I spank you, huh? Naughty boy", you smirk and land another slap, this time on his right thigh. Juyeon retaliates by sucking on your clit harshly, making you yelp from pleasure and you feel him smirk against your pussy. You find the leash and tug it, pulling Juyeon's face even closer to your core. "Behave, or you'll sleep without cumming tonight", you warn him and he whines, but resumes his efforts nonetheless. "Good boy, k-keep it u-up", you stutter as you feel your high approach with each passing second. His tongue is alternating between circling your clit and pumping in and out of your hole, the squelching sounds creating a pornographic scene.

You scream as you cum on Juyeon's face, your whole body shaking, as he helps you ride out your orgasm with kitten licks. You pull yourself together and turn around to face him, as he nastily licks his lips to taste your essence. "Sweet like fucking candy", he comments, "Want a taste, baby?". You pull him by the leash and crash your lips on his, tasting yourself, as your tongues dance crazily in a battle of dominance. "You're still acting like a brat, but since you did as I said, maybe you deserve to cum after all", you state and bend down to remove his boxers and free his painfully hard erection.

"Y/N, stop fucking teasing already!", Juyeon whines again and you slap his thigh again, "Where did your manners go, baby?".

"Please, Y/N..."

"Please what?"

"Please use my cock to cum"

"Fuck, such a good boy", you moan and spear yourself onto his hard cock, the sudden stretch tipping between pain and pleasure. You give yourself almost no time to adjust and you start riding Juyeon like a mad woman. He pistons his hips in unison, pounding into you with a speed neither of your brains are able to register. You put your hands on his broad chest for support and he holds your hips with his hands so tight you might get bruises the next day. Neither of you are able to contain your obscene moans nor form coherent sentences, way too lost in pleasure and lust.

"Fuck, Juyeon, you're such a good boy, so good for me", "Only for you Y/N, shit- only yours", he groans and his hips start to falter, signaling his upcoming orgasm. "I-I'm close again, nngh..", you mewl as you feel your insides clench around his cock like a vice. "M-Me too, Y/N please let me cum, let me f-fill you up baby", "Oh God, yes, fill me with your cum, babe", you moan loudly.

Juyeon moans with you as he stills himself, his cock twitching uncontrollably and flooding your cunt with his hot cum, painting your insides white. You collapse on top of him, panting heavily, the both of you sweating and spent, laughing breathlessly. You muster all the strength you have left in you to remove the choker from Juyeon's neck.

"Oof, thank you baby", he nods, rubbing his neck softly. You swipe a few dark strands of his forehead. You notice the marks on his neck the choker left and you can't help but feel a little regretful. "Did I hurt you?", you ask sheepishly and Juyeon smiles softly and presses a kiss on your nose. "No baby, you were perfect. We should do this more often, actually. You look hella sexy when you take control", he teases and you playfully smack his chest.

"So you intend to dance with random girls in clubs?", you ask and Juyeon smirks,

"No, but I intend to be not such a good boy for you".

#juyeon smut #tbz juyeon #lee juyeon #the boyz smut #the boyz fanfics #tbz #would you look at that #another juyeon fanfic

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belle-keys · 3 years

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Reflections: The way Grace brings out the worst in James (Necessary incongruity in characterization)

This is just something that came to mind, but James’ characterization used to seem so strange to me sometimes until it finally, like, hit me why that was. (N.B. I’m stupid and this entire point just occurred to me recently okay so don’t pop in my replies telling me everyone already knows this, let me be Captain Obvious.)

The first time we properly met James was in The Midnight Heir, back in 2014 if I’m not mistaken, and DEAR GOD ABOVE, I remember thinking this is the angstiest and darkest Shadowhunter boy yet. No really, TDA then happened and literally nothing Julian ever did topped The Midnight Heir for me in terms of “wow, I’m kinda terrified for this boy”.

Like, I was just so shocked at how James was characterized in that short story. In a single story he: shot at the ceiling with a gun, got mad drunk in public, disrespected Magnus, embraced ducks, disrespected Jem, almost let himself DROWN for God’s sake.

“He was nothing but a shadow among shadows again. He was an infuriating Cheshire cat of a boy, nothing left of him but the impression of his smile. “My father was cursed,” James said from the darkness. “Whereas I? I’m damned.”

THIS WAS SO WILD MAN? Like this shit is so darksided right!?!?

He seems so unhappy and bitter and it’s all so dramatic? Like not even young Will was like this cus Will always covered up his pain with jokes and doting over Jem but Jamie was just... yooo, shit was scary to me okay. Then, in Nothing but Shadows, Cast Long Shadows and Every Exquisite Thing we got the *real* Jamie, right? He was just a cute socially awkward bookworm with a good heart and not sure how to fit into society and NONE of that darkness was to be seen in those stories. Sure, he was closed-off and secretive if anything but that’s really it, nothing like what we saw in TMH.

Theeeeeen Chain of Gold happened and he was just such a sweet, dashing, handsome, literary bean (🥺)??? And I was still left wondering like why was he depicted like that in The Midnight Heir cus he definitely didn’t act out like that any time in Gold. I did not for one second see that rage in him. Like we’ve been reminded by Matthew and James himself that he has a rage yet I felt, even up until reading Gold, that I had not seen that rage and bitterness since The Midnight Heir.

However, the ending of Iron definitely clears things up for me: it’s the Grace Effect.

“You have not just made me think that I loved you, you have subsumed my will over and over until I no longer know who I am. Do you even understand what it is that you’ve done?”

“No,” James snapped. “Enough. Not another word out of you. You came here tonight thinking I was still under the spell’s power—that I would hide you from your mother because I was your duped, doting fool. You had no intention of telling me the truth—”.

“Bitterness made it hurt to speak. “I would throw you onto the street,” said James, “but this power of yours is no better than a loaded gun in the hands of a selfish child. You cannot be allowed to continue to use it. You do know that?”

From a literary standpoint, this seems to be an allusion to that moment where Pip tells off Estella for not having a heart and for being an asshole to him. Like you’re left wondering where on earth did the little pushover orphan boy go?

Within the novels so far this has got to be the harshest I’ve ever heard Jamie speak (Grace deserves it btw). Like he’s on the verge of snapping “stfu and listen to me: you have manipulated and gaslit me and if it were up to me and not for my stupid honor I’d cast you and your pathetic self out into the cold”. (Ugh he’s such a badass).

Granted, he was not drunk and is much more mature than he was in the Bane Chronicles BUT his words here are so loaded. He learned that Grace was duping him the whole time and then BOOM this man was about to throw her into the street like he was MAD mad at the whole situation PLEASE. And then it really hit me that only Grace can hurt him like this and bring out this very facet of his character that we very rarely see, yet, was used for us to be introduced to him? His rage. From a technical standpoint, only Grace can bring out this side of him, and in a way, she’s a narrative tool used to fuel his characterization.

The first time Jamie acted out in TMH, he had gotten that letter from Grace saying she was suddenly gonna break off their love (🤢) and then he shows the worst part of himself. Now, Grace shows up at his doorstep and he learns about the enchantment and he uses the most fiery language I’ve ever seen him use, jarring in contrast to his typically attractive composure. Thus, the discrepancy between that original means of characterizing him as rebellious and bitter is like, solved, in the grander scheme of the situation given where Grace falls into his narrative arc as a person. Furthermore, it gives us a really nice contast between Will and his father. Everyone lowkey thought in 2014 that Jamie would be like Will or Jace cus Herondale right yet showing this dichotomy between Will and James’ darkness is so effective. Will’s darkness, his “curse”, was a secret he hept hidden from the world. Jamie’s darkness, his “damnation”, is a secret he himself was (mostly) not privy to. He’s not his full self when Grace is in the picture so we get that wrath and lack of control in some form or fashion which is so cool from an analytical perspective? It shows Cassie like really planned this shit out to the tee so many years in advance and it actually wasn’t true incongruity in his characterization at all.

#my degree is making me read things critically sometimes and I hate it #all of this just to say that I actually still love Grace #the last hours #tlh #the shadowhuter chronicles #tsc #chain of iron #chain of gold #james herondale #jamie herondale #heronstairs #jordelia #grace blackthorn #cassie clare #cassandra clare #ya books #books #book lover #chain of thorns

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freddyfreebat · 4 years

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Jack Dylan Grazer Discovers Who He Is in Luca Guadagnino's “We Are Who We Are”

After supporting roles in the It and Shazam!, the young actor shifts gears with his turn as a capricious army brat in the Call Me By Your Name director's new HBO series.

by Iana Murray / Photography by Nik Antonio — September 14, 2020

A few years ago, Jack Dylan Grazer took a trip to the movie theater. He was in Toronto and it was one of his days off from filming Shazam!, the DC comedy in which he plays the shape-shifting hero’s foster brother. He decided to watch Call Me By Your Name, and he immediately fell for it. Grazer took note of the director’s name that appeared in the credits—Luca Guadagnino—and turned to his mother.

“I want to work with him,” he told her. With eerie prescience, she assured him: “You will.”

Whether Grazer, now 17, has a knack for manifestation, or it was all just happenstance, his wish came true in the form of We Are Who We Are, Guadagnino’s coming of age drama which follows a group of army brats living on an American military base in Italy. Thematically, the show is something of a spiritual successor to Call Me By Your Name: Grazer plays Fraser, a tempestuous 14-year-old with a pair of headphones constantly plugged in his ears. He’s the new arrival at the base with his mothers (Chloë Sevigny and Alice Braga), and quickly forms a deep bond with his neighbour, Caitlin (Jordan Kristine Seamon), as they both wrestle with their sexuality and identity in the midst of domestic troubles and teenage debauchery.

“He’s an enigma to himself,” Grazer says of his character. “He doesn’t really understand a lot of the things he does but he’s so forthright so he convinces himself that he knows everything. He feels like other people don’t deserve his intelligence. But he’s also very volatile and aggressive at times, and not because he’s coming from an angry place but because he’s constantly questioning who he is.”

If Fraser is just beginning his coming of age when we first meet him, Grazer is inching closer to the end. Starring in enormous blockbusters including IT, he became the Loser Club’s resident hypochondriac at age 12 and a superhero’s sidekick by 15. His films have grossed a combined total of over $1.5 billion. Suddenly the stakes are multiplied tenfold during what are ostensibly, and horrifyingly, the most awkward years of your life. Every misstep is now being monitored, examined through a microscope of millions. (See: His 3.8 million fans on Instagram, to say nothing of the countless stan accounts.) Child fame is a disarming transaction like that: a stable career and all the other perks of being a celebrity, but at the cost of normalcy. That unalleviating pressure forces a kid to mature fast.

Grazer is acutely aware of this fact, admitting outright that he’s “not a normal person.” But he wouldn’t have it any other way.

“I became 70 when I was 7!” he laughs. “I don’t know if I really had much of a childhood. But I didn’t want to. I wanted to grow up really fast.”

Nevertheless, he’s still 17. When we meet over Zoom, his shoulder length curls are damp and disheveled (he just got out of the shower), his black painted fingernails contrast with his brightly-lit, white bedroom as he rests his face on his hand. It’s a Saturday morning and he looks tired: It’s his first week back at school, which has traded classrooms for hours of video calls reminiscent of the one we’re currently on. “It feels like the days are shorter because the teachers don’t want to torture their students by keeping them on a computer for six hours a day,” he tells me. “You do miss the social aspect of being at school.”

If you were to judge Grazer by what’s out there on the internet, you’d expect an anarchic and relentless bundle of energy. A quick YouTube search brings up results like “jack dylan grazer being a drama queen” and “jack dylan grazer being chaotic in interviews for 4 and a half minutes straight.” He trolled a YouTube gamer on Instagram Live. His TikToks are inscrutable.

But here, he’s incredibly earnest, as he excitedly talks about his skateboarding hobby (a skill he picked up after auditioning for Mid90s) and his attempts to learn the flute (“I need to learn how to read sheet music, but it’s like reading Hebrew!”). He’s calm and thoughtful, as if this project we’re discussing requires a shift in sensibility.

For Grazer, acting had always simply been fun. While other kids might take up a sport or get hooked on video games, he performed in musical theater with the Adderley School because he “just wanted to play.” His roles so far have been reflective of his carefree approach to the job: Up until now, he’s portrayed best friends with biting one-liners, or the younger version of the protagonist in a flashback. IT is a prime example of both. In the horror franchise, Grazer plays a neurotic germaphobe running from a fear-eating clown, but in reality, the film felt like “summer camp.” Both films never felt like work; he just learned his lines and got to hang out on extravagant sets with his best friends. Likewise, school amounted to being pulled off set by a teacher in between takes to cram in the mandatory hours.

But with We Are Who We Are, he steps into his first leading role, one that required him to convey longing and confusion through Elio-like physicality and subtext. It’s abnormal to talk about the show as a turning point for an actor who isn’t even a legal adult yet, but Grazer explains that the show required him to radically change his approach to acting. He spent six months in Italy (“It felt like I was in Call Me By Your Name.”) and built up the character beyond what was on the page in collaboration with Guadagnino. “His philosophy is that we know our characters better than anyone else—even the writers—because we are the characters essentially,” he explains.

In many ways, Grazer absorbed that philosophy entirely. He describes the experience less as a performance and more like a “rebirth”—perhaps even an attempt at method acting. Over those months in Italy, the distinctions between actor and character gradually became indistinguishable. “I had no other choice but to act and surrender to Fraser entirely and throw Jack Dylan Grazer out the window,” he says. “I would go out and get a coffee as Fraser and walk like Fraser. That was just me trying to get into [character], but then I slipped at some point and just became Fraser.”

One day on set, he looked at himself in the mirror, and the hardened kid standing there with a bleach-blond dye job and oversized shorts was unrecognizable to him. He could only see Fraser. While talking about his character, he seems to unintentionally switch pronouns, from “he” to “I”, as if the two still remain one and the same.

The process was so transformative that it forced him to re-evaluate himself entirely. “I never really struggled with identity before,” Grazer tells me. “But I think the show opened up my eyes to question myself. Being Fraser forced me to question what I wanted and what I stood for and what I believed in. At some points, the show bled into reality.”

When asked how he has changed, he takes a pause and a pensive swivel in his armchair, unsure of how to answer. “I think I was more ignorant before I did the show,” he says, and he leaves it at that.

Coming of agers are a particularly well-trodden genre, but there’s a naturalistic, raw energy to We Are Who We Are that is distinctive from what we’ve seen before. Each character quietly struggles with their own problems and growing pains—for Fraser, it’s his sexuality. Caught in a fraught relationship with his lesbian mother and an infatuation with another man, his story doesn’t tick off the familiar beats. His personal discovery is instead internal and intimate. "I think every single person born as a boy has this guard. It’s this guard that they don’t even realize they have, where they’re initially like, ‘Being gay? I could never.’ But we’re all born as humans who are attracted to whatever we’re attracted to," he says. "I think that’s how Fraser interprets it as well. Yes, he’s reserved and nervous about it in the beginning because he’s unlocking this new idea for himself. He’s figuring it out, and that’s what you see in the show: him coming to terms with this idea."

As our conversation winds to a close, I ask him if Martin Scorsese ever visited the set—his daughter, Francesca, plays the confident cool girl of the show’s teen cohort—and his eyes widen. “That was actually a really stressful day,” he divulges. Still, he revels in the memory, speaking so fast it’s like someone has put him on 2.5x speed as he shows off his impersonation of Guadagnino. The director was so nervous about Scorsese’s presence that production halted that day.

“Luca was like, ‘I cannot do this today because Martin Scorsese is on my set. I don’t know what to do, this is not good for me. I will have a panic attack before the day ends,’” Grazer says in his best Italian accent. “It’s like if you’re a painter and Van Gogh shows up.”

Admittedly, Grazer is also a self-proclaimed superfan of the Wolf of Wall Street director, and afterwards, he got to spend several days with his idol, as they went on lavish restaurant outings in Italy and talked about anything and everything.

He takes a second to compose himself. A giddy, Cheshire cat smile spreads across his face. The kid in him comes flooding back.

“...Oh my god!” he yells. “I met Martin Scorsese!”

#jack dylan grazer #fraser wilson #we are who we are #eddie kaspbrak #it chapter two #freddy freeman #shazam!#wawwa #luca guadagnino #hbo #hbo max #sky atlantic #interview #gq #wawwa press

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bigskydreaming · 3 years

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And one more bit from the “Kings of the Sky” AU albeit several installments in, because I just......don’t know when or why I stumbled into an obsession with the dynamics between Dick and Jason and Cass as the eldest three Wayne siblings, but its there, its real, and its happening. I’ve stopped fighting it. I just....enjoy writing those three being dumb siblings who are dumb like so, so much.

Anyway, in this AU series, Jason doesn’t go to Ethiopia and die, but rather eventually joins Dick at Titans Tower more regularly and is Flamebird. Both are closer with Bruce here than in canon because Dick helped Bruce and Jason get through the Garzonas stuff and Jason helped kick Bruce in the direction of Dick and adoption papers right after the Brother Blood storyline. Then Cass is actually the third to join the family, by way of Babs, and she’s Batgirl and then Black Bat, but there’s a period of time when its just Dick, Jason and Cass as the Wayne kids.

(PS - this is the same series as where Jason ends up with his own age group of Titans, and accidentally falls into a love quadrangle of doom that is absolutely NOT a polycule dammit, with Tom Bronson (Tomcat), Ray Terrill (The Ray) and Todd Rice (Obsidian). Which amuses his brother and sister to no end).

Tim and Duke are both next, but sorta at the same time? Like Tim’s story takes a sharp turn when Robin II never dies and obviously is Flamebird now like Robin I is Nightwing, and Tim winds up in foster care after his parents die differently than in canon. Duke is also in foster care at this time, though a different placement, and while no Robin has died here, its been awhile since there’s been one in Gotham, and to kids who grew up with the idea of there always being a Robin, that feels weird and wrong ultimately.

So Tim and Duke both hit on the idea of being Robin like, at around the same time and totally disconnected from one another, and that leads to them both joining the Batfam around the same time, and co-sharing Robin until Damian arrives much later and they both move on to new identities. But there’s no real confusion between Robins because Duke is the daytime Robin with more yellow coloring in his costume and Tim is the nighttime Robin with more red, and people say Red or Yellow if they ever need to differentiate which Robin they’re talking about. Anyway.

************

So [Tim and Duke] run into trouble eventually and then when running from trouble they run into each other and they’re like….huh. Awkward. And then they decide well, might as well both run from trouble in the same direction, I guess. So they do.

“Did you have a plan for dealing with these guys?” Tim yelled at Duke. The other boy looked back over his shoulder briefly and gave what would probably have been a half-shrug if he didn’t awkwardly try to barrel-roll over a car two seconds later.

“Umm, sorta?”

“How sorta are we talking about? Maybe the two of us together could fill in the gaps in the plan and come up with one full plan?”

“Uh yeah, no, its not that kinda sorta. I meant sorta in the sense that I thought I had a plan but it didn’t work and that’s why these guys are after me. Sooooo…”

“Not helpful, basically.”

“Yeah. Pretty much. And hey, I don’t hear you offering up a plan! Did you even have one at all?”

“Uh….I mean I kinda didn’t think I was going to need one because I figured some kid running around in a mask making a nuisance of himself was the sorta thing that was bound to attract Batman. And so I was just pretty much running around until that happened, and then I’d make a case for how I obviously need training and Gotham needs Robin and if its not me its likely to be someone else trying eventually anyway so why not be me?”

Duke paused just long enough to squint at him. “That’s a terrible plan.”

Tim rolled his eyes. The effort didn’t pair well with his huffing and over-all exertions from running for his life and all that, but necessity demanded. “Yeah I know, that’s why I never said it was a plan! It was mostly….more…idea-ish.”

“I’m just saying, I thought I was doing this wrong, but at least I had a plan! I mean yeah, it might have ended up with me accidentally busting in on what I thought was a bunch of Riddler’s henchmen setting up some kind of clue thing, only it was actually a bunch of Intergang type guys with alien space guns or some shit all dressed up as Riddler henchmen for some reason? I dunno what they were trying to do honestly, but so yeah I might have ended up running away on foot from like twenty of them and some kind of hovercycle -”

“I’m going to cut you off there and say wherever this is going its probably not the superior vantage point I think you think you have.”

Meanwhile, Batman was not going to be coming because he’s off on a JLA mission. However, in his absence Dick and Jason are in town filling in, and they finished taking out the bad guys several blocks back and caught up to whomever was running from them, figured out the situation and are currently sitting on the edge of a rooftop watching them realize they’re totally lost and trying to figure out where to go from here. Mostly because Dick and Jason are incredibly amused listening to their back and forth and also just…this whole situation.

Dick justifies not piping up to let them know they’re safe now by saying this is good intel gathering so we can offer Bruce our assessment as to whether they’re gonna try and keep doing this whether we train them or not, and also how they handle this whole being lost situation. Not knowing they don’t have to run anymore isn’t going to hurt them and really, this is a good field exercise almost.

Jason justifies not piping up by saying this is fucking hilarious and I will hurt you if you end this any sooner than we have to, I deserve this, I had a rough week.

Which is right around the time that Cass pipes up from where she’s been lurking unnoticed behind them this whole time: “Oh no. Was it Tom? Or Ray? Or was it Todd?”

And she does it right in Jason’s ear so he kinda aborted-shrieks and almost falls off the roof except Cass is ready for that and grabs his arm to steady him.

“I hate when you do that!” Jason growls in an attempt to cover up how badly she got him and also because he hates when she does it which is why she does it a lot. Again, they don’t hate each other at all, but they do seem to act like it a lot, and neither of them is entirely sure why. They kinda just started doing it and have each been trying to get the other back ever since and ended up locked in an unending spiral of gotcha-gotchaback, except, y’know, Batfam style.

Dick occasionally picks sides just to muddy the waters. And then he randomly switches sides without warning, so neither of them ever wants to risk getting too peeved at him even when he’s helping the other, because that might push him fully over to the other side and leave them permanently outnumbered, so they’re kinda stuck, which is exactly as he likes it, lol.

“Why are you Satan,” Jason hisses dramatically as he gets up and stomps over to the other side of the roof to sulk, lest she almost knock him off again. Its not the almost falling part that bothers him, its that she’s the one that snatches him to safety each time. She’s like a freaking cat toying with a - yeah not going there, just blaming Selina. Knew them hanging out was going to be bad news for me somehow, he gripes.

Cass just shrugs and smoothly sits down cross-legged right where she is, grinning Cheshire-cat style at him from there. “Childhood trauma,” is her answer.

“Great, and now you’re stealing my comeback on top of it?! Is nothing sacred to you?”

She offers another shrug. He would like to return those for store credit please. Maybe get something useful instead. “Haven’t decided yet. Babs is still helping me explore my options. We’re going alphabetically and we’re only on the E-religions.”

“God, you’re the worst. I can’t believe you ruined sisters for me.”

“You already used that same line last week when you came out of your room still half-asleep and she was just sitting directly across from your door waiting and staring unblinking and you yelped and dropped your laptop on your toe, and then cursed so loud that B came running around the hall thinking we were being invaded,” Dick reported idly, still perched in the same position he’d been in all along and watching the boys below them. “Just in case you thought no one noticed when you recycle.”

“I noticed too,” Cass added solemnly.

“I have no siblings,” Jason intoned. He threw up his hands dramatically and then loudly jumped down to the street below with a little help from the fire escape. It drew both Duke and Tim’s attention and they startled before realizing it was Flamebird. And that he’d landed on the street and was stalking past them while barely acknowledging them. And that that was Nightwing standing on the roof now with his hands on his hips yelling after him.

“Oh, reeeeeeal subtle. You’re not having fun anymore so you gotta make sure nobody else does either. Wow, the Brat-like behavior, just jumped out of the shadows with that one!”

And that was Flamebird not even turning around and just yelling back. “I HAVE NO SIBLINGS!”

And also they were both pretty sure that was Batgirl crouched on the roof next to Nightwing now, and she was…..sticking her tongue out at Flamebird’s back? No, Batgirl very much definitely was sticking out her tongue, that wasn’t in doubt, it was more just….very unexpected to see.

What was happening right now?

********

Eventually Tim and Duke have inevitably worn down [Bruce’s] resistance to training them by insisting they’re gonna keep doing this and if its not them its gonna be someone sooner or later anyway. Because, as they put it, you guys may not know this but Gotham’s gotten used to Robins by now and it freaks people out not to see one and Robin’s as important as Batman really and there needs to be a Robin and its not just us that will think that, like look at the fact that already two of us had the exact same idea, huh? And also, we’re gonna keep doing it anyway, sooooo….there’s that.

And then Cass vouches that they’re both 100% serious about that.

And then Dick vouches that as a former determined daredevil kid that was absolutely going to keep doing the same thing no matter whether you’d helped me or not, B, I also am of the assessment that these two mean it all the way.

And not to be left out and just to have something to contribute but also grumpy because his brother and sister are picking on him and he’s eighteen going on ten, Jason throws in: “And my assessment is that they both definitely seem dumb enough to keep doing this without help anyway and they definitely need help or they definitely will die, I’d give it a month, month and a half tops.”

And then Bruce dryly thanks his children for their contributions, their keen insights in this matter have been absolutely invaluable, he has no idea how he would make a decision here without it.

“Oooh, a rare sighting of Bat-snark in the wild. Someone call Nat-Geo quick, maybe he’ll do it again,” Dick says.

Bruce sighs. Duke and Tim look like they’re trying to decide if they’re allowed to be amused or if that’s also part of some weird Bat-test that they’re probably taking without even knowing it.

So Tim and Duke move in, start training together, and then also get sent to school together and it takes a month or so of settling in before they decide whether or not they actually are happy about this. There’s a period of deciding they’re supposed to be bitter rivals who snipe at each other back and forth across the dining table at every available opportunity, but that changes the first night Dick and Jason come back from the Tower since Tim and Duke have moved in and where Cass is also home instead of at the Clocktower with Babs.

Since all three of the older Batkids, upon seeing Tim and Duke squabble at dinner, decide to obnoxiously coo about how adorable it is watching the kids play. Which pretty instantly cements Duke and Tim as realizing their best chance of surviving the sudden acquisition of three older superhero ninja foster siblings who all can be as obnoxious as they are dangerous but also as much as they are - Duke and Tim are convinced - all quite insane.

A belief further cemented the next morning, with all three of them having spent the night at the Manor as well. Treating Duke and Tim to their first Saturday morning episode of the Cass and Jason show.

In this episode, Jason emerged from his bedroom in his pajamas still but warily peeking his head out first to look both ways down the hall before deciding it was clear…..and then makes it just almost to the end of the hallway leading to the stairs, when Cass drops down from where she’d been waiting perched above the other side of the door, in such a way as to suddenly fill the doorway just in front of him, hanging upside down suspending herself just with her feet wedged above the doorway, all while keeping her hands crossed her chest, a dead-eyed expression on her face, and with her tongue hanging out like she’s some kind of vampire hanging upside down in mid-slumber.

Jason shrieked and stumbled back a foot before catching himself and shoving two fingers in a cross shape in her direction.

“Demon! DEMON! Goddammit, I abjure thee, that’s supposed to fucking do something about having a demon sister, now what the fuck does it take to banish you!?”

“Can’t be banished,” Cass informed him, still upside down. “Can be bought though.”

Jason halted. “What?”

“I’m really surprised you never figured it out,” Dick said from his room further down the hallway. He was leaning against the doorjamb, arms casually crossed.

“Why did you think she never goes after me?”

Jason swiveled back and forth between his siblings suspiciously, trying to scry both their inscrutable (and in Cass’ case, still upside down) faces for signs they were telling the truth. “You’re telling me that Little Miss Monstrous has been a pain in my ass from day one and the reason she’s never so much as eked a single boo in your direction is you’ve been bribing her all this time?”

Dick shrugged. “Its all about getting in on the ground floor.”

Jason squinted, still unconvinced. “Nuh-uh. No way. You’re just fucking with me. Like if this is for real, what have you been buying her off with?”

Dick smiled beatifically. “Cuddles and hugs.”

“NO! NO! Bullshit! I am NOT falling for this crap again, you are not gonna get me this way this time. I call BS, fuck you, nuh uh, you’re lying out your ass and your ass-face both.”

“Wait, what is this ‘this’ that I did before? What ever are you talking about?”

“You know damn well what I’m talking about.”

“Is this about the Care Bear you had when you were fifteen?”

“Shut upppppppppppppppp, I didn’t have a Care Bear then, you’re such a - “

“Oh, I dunno, I’m preeeeetty sure there’s some holiday photos from that year that would say otherwise, pretty definitively in the form of you and your Care Bear….”

“That I only had because you literally just gave it to me as a present solely so that you could claim that I had a Care Bear when I was fifteen, you douchebag!”

“Just because I gave you the Care Bear didn’t mean you had to keep the Care Bear and hold the Care Bear and love the Care Bear, Jay. You chose to do all that.”

“I only kept the damn thing because you’re an asshole who lied about it being a family heirloom so I felt like I had to or I’d be a total jerk. Is nothing sacred to you?”

“I didn’t lie! It is a treasured family heirloom! Its the first Care Bear I gave to my little brother to teach him the important and valuable lesson that Care Bears - say it with me now - “

“Finish that sentence and they will never find your body.”

“CARE!” Cass shrieked from behind him before jumping on Jason’s back and bearing him down to the floor in an undignified tangle as she splayed atop him like a starfish and he stared up at the ceiling in a kind of strangled frozen fury, like there was so much emotion he wanted to process he’d overheated and now was stuck like that until he cooled down.

That was when Dick leaned over him and solemnly added one final thought, as though it was a crucial addition of the gravest importance:: “A lot.”

Jason’s eye twitched.

Dick’s eyes went wide in response. “Uh oh. He went to the Danger Zone. Run Cass. We’ve unleashed the dogs of war!”

Cass was off and on her feet in a second, taking off down the hall like a rocket. “Not the dogs of war!” She yelled.

Dick was only seconds behind her when behind him, Jason rose like an eruption, growling wordlessly and sparks practically flashing from his suddenly flinty eyes. He charged after them like an enraged bull.

“Kenny Loggins wouldn’t want this!” Dick yelled over his shoulder as he rounded the doorway and vanished. Jason rounded it in hot pursuit.

“Poison Ivy won’t even be able to make compost from what’s left of you when I’m through!”

The yelling and running vanished into the distance. Duke and Tim finally looked at each other blankly.

“What?” Tim asked. Duke shrugged helplessly.

A door opened at the end of the hallway. Bruce stuck his head out. “Is it safe?”

Tim just stared at him.

“What?” Duke asked.

**************

LOL mostly I just want to get to the tail end of the series, when Dick and Jason go undercover as supervillains in the Society of well, Supervillains....Dick as War Shrike and Jason as Gray Jay. (A kind of bird usually known for or referenced as being thieving and unpredictable and unexpectedly dangerous despite its size. Jason never went into the Lazarus Pit here and so isn’t as huge as he is in canon, he’s on the smaller side due to his early life’s malnutrition. Living with Bruce helped him catch up enough that he’s not TINY tiny, but he’s still smaller enough that this particular mantle fits him a little better than it would his massive canon depiction).

Cass also partakes in the undercover storyline, just showing up uninvited in a persona she’s crafted for the mission and calls Black Swan. And War Shrike and Gray Jay are both so startled and obviously a little freaked by her unexpected arrival, that combined with her being ticked at her brothers for leaving her behind, RUDE, and them sufficiently cowed and guilted by her wrath, that it all adds up to the other villains as being clear evidence that she is the boss and they are her advance minions.

Which mollifies and satisfies Cass immensely, and leaves Jason grumpy that their mission was hijacked and also his sister is The Worst, and leaves Dick temporarily disgruntled because This Whole Thing Was His Idea DAMMIT but then five seconds later finding it hilarious because Dick is a chaos connoisseur and he has an appreciation for whimsy and the unexpected.

“I can’t believe you not only gate-crashed our extremely sensitive and delicate undercover operation, but you completely hijacked it as well! This is so typical,” Jason grouched.

Cass simply swept ahead of him and strode down the hallway with lethal grace. “Silence minion.”

Jason spluttered behind her and she grinned to herself. He really made it too easy sometimes.

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