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phantom-of-the-501st · 6 days

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Thoughts on TBB 3x15

Here we go... one last time

SPOILERS BELOW THE CUT

Honestly thought I was going to be late to the episode but I actually work up at 8:01 am today so I am just a couple mins behind everyone else.

Am I prepared? Absolutely not.

Well that's an ominous noise. Always a good way to start 😰

The Kiner soundtrack is popping off as usual

I just need Hemlock to die

Indispensable? I'm not sure about that, mate. A lot of people have realised the Empire don't need them and I'm fairly certain you are on the list of people who can be ditched

Hahahahahaha the way the droid just starts looming behind her is kinda hilarious

OMEGA'S THEME 😭

Wrecker, bud, be careful...

Look at Omega sneaking around. She's so grown up! 🥲

ZILLOBEAST TIME

"Because that's exactly what I'd do" He's such a proud mum

THE WAY THE TROOPERS COME FLYING OUT OF THE FOG

"Clone Force 99 died with Tech`' well there goes my heart. I think this also explains why we haven't really heard the Batch theme since season 2. That theme was for CF 99 and if that doesn't truly exist anymore...

"It's what I deserve" CROSSHAIR DON'T DO THIS TO ME

"Echo's handiwork or Omega's?" "Omega's." I'M DYING

Omega's theme in this soundtrack is just 🤌

Oh great. We have a whole group of Clone Xs to contend with.

I just need all of the Batch together so that we can get the theme. I know I said earlier that we probably never got it because of a lack of Tech but I still stand by the fact that we deserve to hear it one last time.

These CX soldiers almost feel like a parallel to the Batch. One slightly larger, more hand-to-hand combat oriented soldier, one who fights with blades, a sniper, ONE WHO IS VERY TECH SAVVY 👀

WRECKER AAAAAAHHHH THIS IS NOT GOOD

NOT THE HAND

WTF?!

HELP

THIS IS NOT GOOD 😰

Fuuuuuccckkk Echo's seen them down

"Causing chaos, Havoc 5?" HE'S STILL MAKING QUIPS IN THIS SITUATION I LOVE HIM

"Hey, kid. And... other kids." PLEASE 😭

"We'll meet you there" YOU BETTER DO

Echo and Omega teaming up is everything I ever needed ❤️‍🩹

Hemlock needs to die a slow, painful death

ECHO'S SPEECH FEELS LIKE THE SPEECH HE AND FIVES GAVE DURING THE ATTCK ON KAMINO I FEEL SICK

Rampart looking sus...

This feels like this isn't going as terribly as it could be and that scares me

Aw ☹️ bye, Nala Se. I never really loved you but it's sad to see you go

HAHAHAHAHA FUCK YOU, RAMPART

AAAAAAAHHHH ECHO GOT STABBED

You know what I said 2 seconds ago about it not being terrible? I think I spoke too soon...

YES WRECKER

I'm not liking the position Echo is stuck in rn. That stresses me out 😥

We're not exactly in top form but hey, an attempt is being made

ECHO BE CAREFUL

Soooo... I get the feeling CX-2 isn't Tech...

AW NO SCORCH

FUCK YES!!! Bye Hemlock 👋

THE LOOK ON CROSSHAIR'S FACE WHEN SHE HUGS HIM AAAAAHHHH

Tarkin is not going to be a happy bunny

Oop we got a Project Stardust mention

THE SHOW ENDING WITH THEM ON PABU??? LIKE AN ACTUAL SOMEWHAT HAPPY ENDING???

I'm crying

Actually sobbing

That shot of them all sat by the tree 😭😭😭

A FUCKING EPILOGUE KMN

I can't breath

SHE REMINDS ME OF PHEE AAAAHHH

GONKY!!! 🥹

OLD HUNTER?!

Omega is joining the Rebellion? 🥺

Crosshair, Hunter and Wrecker all got to live to an old age in relative peace I'm in so many tears rn

Okay but if Echo isn't with the others at this point then where is he??? PLEASE TELL ME HE'S STILL AROUND

TECH'S GOGGLES?!

I'm not okay on any level

Okay, so overall, I'm relatively satisfied with the ending. I also cried about as much as I would have done if they all died so my emotions are still all over the place. Do I think every question we had came to a satisfying conclusion? Not quite. But I think we tied up enough loose ends for me to be content.

And I'm happy they got a somewhat happy ending. Knowing that they get to live a life in relative peace makes me happy, and we know that Hunter, Wrecker and Crosshair at least make it another few years. Omega joining the Rebellion also seems apt. As an Echo girly I unfortunately don't feel quite as secure with where we left off. I don't have the same level of closure that I do with the others because we know that around this point in time, he isn't with Rex. But he also isn't with the Batch either. I hope we get to see more of him in future projects because I don't quite feel satisfied with this being the end of his story. He's doing too much for it to stop there.

Also... we were wrong about Tech. The level of delusion we carried throughout this season, my god. 😭 But it means I'm confused by some of their choices. The way they focused on being savvy with technology, the way he moves being similar to Tech, FUCKING DOMICILE??? Like, they have to have known that we would all go that way with our theories so why??? If it wasn't him they why was he written the way he was? I refuse to believe everything we thought was purely out of delusion. Does this mean I have issues with the way Tech's story ended? Yes. But overall I think the show wrapped up fairly well.

I'll try and drop some more thoughts later down the line once I've pulled myself together a bit, but for now I can say that I am content. Completely satisfied? Not really, but definitely content.

#well that's it #the end of the bad batch #I'm going to try and throw some more coherent thoughts out over time #but for now I just need to think on things for a little but #but how are we all feeling?#the bad batch #the bad batch season 3 #the bad batch spoilers #tbb spoilers #tbb wrecker #tbb crosshair #tbb hunter #tbb omega #tbb echo

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justimagineok · 1 year

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2:30 series - drops of love 12 💌🍼

A/N: hey again :) nice to see you here

n💕 there's gonna be more parts for the pregnancy Edition, so stay tuned 😉

"Good morning, babe.", Jungkook kissed your cheek softly waking you up from your snore. You grumbled a good morning back, and he hummed in satisfaction as he leaned in and gave you a kiss in the belly. "Good morning, baby.", he whispered kissing your belly again.

"Good morning, Kook.", you grumbled again, still not opening your eyes. You heard your husband chuckling as he gave your belly yet another kiss. "I'm sorry, but I wasn't talking to you, babe."

He kissed your belly one more time and this time you opened your eyes to see the wide smile spread in his face. "I was talking to this baby.", he placed his warm hands on your belly, winking at you.

"w-what?", you started to blink fast, and Jungkook cracked up laughing.

"I know you're pregnant, babe. I was waiting till you're ready to talk about it.", he shrugged helping you sit down. "although I almost woke you up 5 times so we could talk."

"y-you're not mad at me?", you asked as your eyes filled with tears. Jungkook giggled, shaking his head.

"Why would I be? I couldn't be more happy, YN." , you studied Jungkook's features and you wondered how in the heavens you could ever think he'd be mad at you. In fact, you noticed as his bunny smile turned into a small pout as his eyes filled with years.

"I couldn't sleep a wink last night...", he confessed as he reached for your hand. "In fact I almost woke you up, but I figured it wouldn't be a good idea since you need to sleep a lot more now.", his eyebrows furrowed as he looked at the ring on your finger. "I always imagined how would it be when I discovered I was going to be a dad, but finding out how I did was the best way ever..", he looked at you.

"How did you know, Kook?"

He smiled again, kissing your hand. "You literally glowed up, babe.", you twisted your head, confused.

"I keep telling you I know you like the back of my hand, babe.", he bragged, making you smile.

"C'mon, tell me, Kook."

Jungkook sighted, ready to confess. "I wanna be a gentleman and say that i just felted in my heart, but the truth is that i started to get suspicious when i noticed that your boobs were getting bigger.", he smirked, offering you a wink. "you also stopped eating my skittles and told me they smell like cleaning product when you and I both know that skittles are the most delicious thing on the galaxy. ", he kept rambling, " also, you threw up like 3 times last week and you never do that unless you're sick and you rejected wine on our date night and we also know that never happens either, so that was when i was sure," he let go of your hand, bowing to sign he was done with his speech.

Jeon Jungkook was an allegory. You always knew.

"Kook", you reached for him and Jungkook immediately pulled you in for a tight hug. "I'm so happy.", you stated as your busted in tears.

"Then why are you crying, babe?", he asked, amused.

"Because I'm so scared, Kook.", you nested your head in his shoulder, sobbing. "What if I'm not a good mother? What if I'm like my mother? What if I'm not like your mother? What if I failed with our baby? Wha-",

"YN.", Jungkook called your name as he made space so he could look at you. "listen to me very carefully right now. ", he waited until you nodded. "You don't have to be like any of them. You just have to be you and I have no doubt in my soul you're gonna be the best mom in the whole universe.", his eyes filled with tears again as he kept speaking. "You're the most stunning, amazing, breath-taking, mesmerizing, courageous, adorable, hot and captivating woman on this earth.", he took a deep breath ready to continue his speech, but you interrupted, pulling him for a kiss.

“you’re the best thing that ever happened to me, YN. And you gave me the best present i could dream of ”, he whispered as he kissed you again. "I'm gonna be the best dad to our baby and I'm gonna be a better husband too."

"You're the best husband I could ever dream of, Jeon.", you bragged as he hugged you.

"I'm a bit scared too.", he confessed in a low tone. "but we're in this together so I'm sure everything will be okay. I love you and our baby so much..", he squeezed you in his arms, making you squeak.

"And we love you, Kook. We love you so much."

art couple by Gyung Studio

#2:30 #bts fake texts #bts fic #bts fake chat #bts fake chats #bts scenarios #bts #jungkook x yn #jk x you #jk x reader #jk x oc #dad jungkook #jungkook x you #jungkook x y/n #jungkook x reader #jk x y/n #fluff jungkook #fluff bts #gyung studio

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artanddaddyissues · 2 years

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*cough*Are you sure that’s me stalking and not my doppelgänge?? / jk

Am doing great, besides the fact i am only going to be here until 3rd of April. WHY AM I IN MY ARCANA PHASE AGAIN AT SUCH A LATE TIME HHH.

Also, I might request some angst headcanons. Maybe someone being dead? Idk shha

Okay 1. ITS OKAY I joined late too, welcome to the club sis 💕

And 2. You. Are. Evil. But I will definitely do some angst for you. I secretly hope you CRY when you read this angst.

What the M6 do, when you die

Heads up: gender neutral pronouns for reader, M/C is yellow, very angsty, read at your own risk, mentions of mental health issues (anxiety, depression, etc…)

------------------------------------------------------------------------------

"not... again..."

absolutely distraught, can no longer sleep, eat, think for himself, walk, breathe... etc.

Half his heart has gone, for good. Many times he contemplates sacrificing himself or other people in exchange for you to come back.

"I can bring them back again, right?"

shop closes for an extended amount of time, the baker starts to worry about him, the others regularly check in on him. He spends most of his days in his gate and the realms in hopes to contact you.

It takes him almost a year to leave the shop and care for himself again.

He curses everything and becomes pretty hostile for a while. Trust issues, anger, depression, everything sky rockets in the worst ways possible, and you aren't there to bring him back to his old self.

Asra needed you all the time. He missed your laugh, your touch, your aura. Living life without your presence made him feel like there was no point to living.

forgets how to function, in the worst way possible.

"Julian, when was the last time you ate?" "I can't remember...”

Walking disaster. He gets drunk more often, there isn’t a moment when he’s sober.

Asra checks in on him at least once a week since he knows how bad Julian can get.

He closes his clinic and tries to stay hidden from the others. He pushes everyone away, in fear of losing someone else.

This isn’t the first time he’s lost someone but, this one hurts the most.

You were the air he breathed. He missed giving you dramatic, romantic speeches and other little things.

He tries to tell Asra to teach him magic, in hopes of contacting you again through the magical realms, “maybe the fools realm.” “The realms are dangerous without-“ “I’ll take any risk to see them again.”

He looks at the collection of love letters, paintings, drawings, photos, anything to keep your face engraved into his mind.

Vesuviua mourns with her. Nadia has been such an incredible leader and so the city mourns when she loses you. I’m a way, the city lost you too, you did a great deal of good for the people of Vesuviua.

“I’ll find you in another lifetime, my dear.”

Like Asra, she knows how the magical realms work. Instead of sleeping each night, she travels to the realms to try and find you. She swears, she's getting close.

Everyone around her is understanding. the entire city saw how incredibly happy you both were together.

She is back to being alone again. Truly alone. Yes she has the others but you... you were there for her every moment of every day. Every breath she took, you were beside her. She had almost forgotten what is was like to be alone, thanks to you.

She dreads waking up and is always in a bad mood after another unsuccessful night of trying to find you.

Has a memorial statue of you in the gardens, facing her private balcony and she cries every time she looks at it.

"I need you back..."

Sobbing for weeks, never leaving his wing, punching holes through his walls, not taking care of himself...

He’s not angry after a few months but sad. He was very angry in the beginning, when he felt like he could have done something, but you can only convince yourself you’re useful so many times.

6 months after your passing, he treks to your home town to hold a proper burial for you.

The people around him in Vesuvia find it hard to see him like this. He could be a threat to anybody but they understand how much you affected him, so they all offer as much support as they can.

You taught him how to be a better person and without you reassuring him each day, he can only hold onto your words and do things he thought was right

he tried his hardest to stay strong in public but it was hard. He wanted to look strong always but the first few weeks were rough.

"Me and Pepi miss you... so much."

She buries you around her cottage, in a secluded corner. She watches every day, the tree you were buried under, grow and prosper. Little white and yellow flowers bloom in the spring and last the whole year.

Nadia gives her as much time off as she needs.

Now, Pfeels completely useless without you though.

The little things hurt the most. Waking up to you changing Pepi's litter, cooking only for one person again, not having any help in the garden, seeing all your clothes in the closet...

"It's okay Pepi..."

Julian visits almost every night for the first few months. He always comes ready to tend to Portia and make her feel as well as she can feel.

"This isn't happening"

he spirals into a long, very angry stage of denial. He can't accept the fact that you're gone when it feels like he just got you.

He makes a vow to himself, to never get attached to another person again in fear of losing them.

he blames himself all the time. "Muriel stop..." "I could have done something.

He can never go back to the person he used to be, because you changed him for the better but now you aren't around to see him anymore. And that kills him inside

Asra is over almost every night.

Inanna has had to pull Muriel out of bed for weeks on end.

He knows you would want him to continue living but its too hard without you there.

He and Asra venture through the realms to try and find you. Muriel is determined.

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euphternal · 3 months

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HANG OOOOON CAN YOU PLEASE MAKE A PT 2 TO DO FAMOUS READER AND JIMMY HC WHERE THE PUBLIC FIND OUT THEYRE DATING??? PLEASE

part two to pink sweetheart ᥫ᭡

epistle: HI ANON!!! ABSOFUCKINGLUTELY I'LL MAKE THIS <333

💗🍧🍥🌸🐇🩰🏩💌🎀

after you've won your first golden globe , for your most amazing performance in barbie 🩷 you have been trending on every type of social media platform . behind close doors , jimmy was unbelievably proud of you 🥹 privately taking you out for dinner or walking around the city late at night because of the restless nights of excitement that you can't believe you even thought of becoming a golden globes nominee 🥲

running it back to the night of the golden globes ... sweat glazing your hands , slicked back hair slowly picked apart from the anxiety comsuming you ... music coming an halt , everyone's heavy breathing echoed the room . " and the winner for the most outstanding acting ... y/n y/l/n , congratulations !! "

after hearing your name echoed through the arena , jaw dropped , eye wide open with adrenaline from shock . you walked your best over to the stage without making a fool of yourself ( as you usually would , because you're clumsy asf , jimmy found that really cute about you 🥹😭 ) .

you finally walked yourself onto the stage , with ( suprisingly with no help ) everyone having applause standing ovation for your most amazing , stunning and beautiful role you have ever done in your years of acting 🥹

" i just want to thank everyone who was included in this beautiful movie , the crew , my family , my friends & mostly to my beautiful boyfriend ... jimmy keene !! without my angel , i would of ever been featured in barbie as one of leading roles ... he's been there with me through thick and thin , to many more beautiful ups and downs to experience together , i love you lots , my ken !! i know you're watching this home right now sobbing , you're kenough babe 😭 , don't worry j , see you 5 minutes . you know i hate these kinds of events , mwahhh ! <33 "

after speed-running your speech into the 1 minute timer everyone is given if they won the golden globes award , everyone around you were continously giving you love , support and light and constantly congratulating you 🥹 . at this point all cameras were darted towards you , full blast shown on the big screen in the arena to dedicate your role in barbie <3

while the chaos was stirring up at the awards show , jimmy was in pure shock too with you winning the biggest award he could ever think of know to man . man he was jumping around in circles , tears streaming down his face from pure happiness , both of yours parents were acting the exact emotions too ...

your phone is on full blast from all of the calls and messages from everyone ... your phone is FUCKED 💀

EVERYONE on EVERY difference social media platform is absolutely flabbergasted with you winning the golden globes and the RELATIONSHIP REVEAL ... LIKE WHAT ??? ( jesus , im literally acting like a fan of their relationship too 😭💀 ) edits are already posted , fanfics are published , twitter and instagram is going absolutely going insane right now ... you especially is trending everywhere right now , now you two are even on the news the next day 😭 everyone is wanting to have an interview with you and jimmy .

slowly moving on , you made your way home with beyond excitement ... as you walked your way to your shared home with jimmy , no lights were on , nothing ...

you slowly unlocked the door to candles lit , petals leaving a scattered path towards the shared living room with open dining room . many bowls layed out , full to the brim with all assortments of your favourite meals n snacks , even the ones from your childhood too 🥹 jimmy sat on the white , wide-bridged sofa with your blankets waiting for you patiently , you didn't even have a second to gasp of air to breathe properly . he engulfed you into the biggest hug he has ever did in his life 💀

you literally just froze up , after it felt like an eternity from the massive bear hug ... he wouldn't slow down with his words from absolute pure happiness and proudness . " babe , breathe . this moment isn't stopping anytime soon ... what are you trying to say ? " after a quiet moment passed of calmness , he finally got his words out . after he explained his speech , both of yous were tearing up embracing each other in another long and very loving bear hug for what felt infinitely forever ...

🫧🎀

#pink sweetheart au 🎀#jimmy keene x fem!reader #jimmy keene x you #jimmy keene x reader #jimmy x reader #jimmy keene #black bird #apple tv

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beantothemax · 10 months

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Part 2 jumpscare!!!!!

A year later

Finally, after far too long, Osvald could hug Elena again. She sobbed for hours after finally meeting him. Her last memory of him was faint, she was hardly alive or even conscious.

They all sat at Clarissa's house. She was more than happy to host their reunion, even allowing the other members of the group to dine at her table. Everyone was in high spirits, except Osvald. He wanted to be happy, but a deal he'd made a year prior loomed over his shoulder.

After giving Elena a hundred hugs and kisses, he pulled Castti aside. He took her out in the moonlight, hoping the thick walls would be enough to keep the others from hearing them.

"What is it?" she murmured.

"She's remembered me," Osvald said.

"That, she has," Castti muttered.

They stood in silence for several moments. He wanted to help her. But if she said no, if she refused to budge...

"Do you still plan to end your life?"

Just like last time, Castti shrugged.

"I still miss Malaya," she said.

"And you haven't found another reason to stay? Another pitiful person to dedicate your life to helping?" Osvald asked.

"No."

He went over his speech in his head. He'd thought of it everyday since their first conversation on the topic. But Castti stopped him mid thought.

"I think I could stay a bit longer though. I love Elena, I'll stay if it means I get to see her grow up."

...what?

It wasn't the answer he was fishing for or even one he excepted, but it wasn't bad. In fact, it was probably one of the best possible answers she could've given. There was no way he could raise a kid alone, let alone with his unending list of problems. Castti was the perfect person to help.

"Really? She means that much to you?" he questioned.

Castti couldn't help but chuckle, "I know it's silly, but she's always so excited to see me and she's adorable, anyone would end up loving her in my situation."

"Huh," was all Osvald could say.

It's not like he couldn't relate. He had similar thoughts of suicide as Castti did. Elena still breathing was the only thing stopping him from killing himself after Harvey.

"Well, here's to Elena," he said.

"Cheers," Castti said.

They downed their drinks, before returning inside. The finer details of how Castti could help would have to wait till tomorrow, her deciding to stay was just as deserving of a celebration as the return of Elena's memories.

glad to see elena receiving the proper amount of hugs and kisses she deserves.

CASTTI. STAYING FOR ELENA’S SAKE. HER STILL JUST WANTING TO BE BACK WITH MALAYA BUT CHOOSING TO LIVE JUST SO SHE CAN WATCH ELENA GROW UP… PIE.,,,,, PIE IM

FBBGFHXTCTIU F GI GIVGIVIGGIV I AM GOING TO SCREAM THIS IS!!!!!! VERY !!!!!! OSVALD BEING SO WORRIED ABOUT HER AND!!!!! CASTTI STAYING AND THE MERE FACT THAT THERE IS GOING TO BE A TOMORROW FOR CASTTI,,,,,, THIS IS VERY GOOD AND I AM GIONG TO GO CRUMPLE MYSELF INTO A BALL NOW

#asks #pie-knight

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backtothestart02 · 2 years

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Life with You and Me - 2/? | clawen fanfiction

A/N: Future chaps will hopefully be longer. Enjoy.

...

Chapter 2 -

10 years later…

On the phone in her bathtub, Claire was listening once again to her mother moan about how not only was she unmarried and without children, but she also hadn’t been on a date in six months. Luckily for her, call waiting broke through and beeped in her ear.

“Mom, for the hundredth time, remember I have lots of babies I care for at the animal shelter.”

“Animals aren’t babies, Claire.”

“Oh! Would you look at that, someone’s trying to call me, I’ll have to call you back, Mom. Love you, bye.”

A swift move and her thumb hit the green circle blinking on her phone, and she even smiled into whoever the next caller might be.

“Hello. May I speak to Claire Dearing?”

“Yes, this is she?”

A bad feeling settled in her gut that she couldn’t shake. It was hard to focus on what the police officer was saying, and when he finally came out and said it, she had to fight to not drop her phone in the tub.

Her entire world shattered.

“Miss?”

“Uh…y-yes, I’m still here.” She swallowed.

“Could you come down to the station? I can tell you more details there.”

“O-Of course.” Tears welled up in her eyes. “What…uh, what did you say your name was again?”

“Young. Officer Young.”

She swallowed.

“Thank you. I’ll be right down.”

Leaning forward, she deliberately set the phone down on her closed toilet and unplugged the bathtub for the water to run out. She moved slowly standing up, then drying herself off. She took one step out of the tub onto the rug and felt like the room was spinning.

“Breathe, Claire. Breathe.”

After a couple moments with her eyes closed, she was able to move at a more regular pace, then faster. She got dressed, reminding herself over and over to keep breathing, and then soon she was in her car on the way to the police station. If they had found her name in their wallet, chances were they had found someone else’s.

Owen.

She let her mind drift to that annoying piece of work who had not gotten any more charming or appealing since their disaster of an almost blind date ten years prior. She got the impression he still didn’t like her any more than she liked him, but they’d been thrust together because when Karen and Scott got married, they chose the two of them as their best man and maid of honor.

It was an unpleasant memory, but less unpleasant than the one she was currently living in, so she relived it in her mind, as she made every attempt not to speed on the 20-minute drive to the station.

Owen got a little tipsy at the wedding, conveniently after his speech and during hers and caused a ruckus that made Scott burst out laughing, then the rest of the guests, and then Owen stole the microphone from her where she’d previously been sobbing her heart out, overwhelmed with happiness at her sister’s wedding…and made another shout out to the happy couple.

“Asshole,” Claire muttered, shaking her head and letting the tears flow.

Memories flowed freely after that. Him touching her hair, nudging her, causing a drink to spill or a picture to be ruined, teasing her relentlessly but not in a way she enjoyed, ever. And he was always a mess, always sleeping around with one girl or the next, never taking women seriously or respecting them. At least that was what he said. She had no reason to doubt him.

When Scott and Karen started having kids, first Zach less than a year after the wedding and then little baby Gray, who was just one year old now, he seemed to take life a little more seriously, what with his job as an animal trainer at the zoo, sometimes a dog trainer, though he never volunteered his services at her animal shelter. She frowned, deep in thought and irritated over that fact for some reason.

Scott and Karen had named her and Owen the godparents of both their children, so they saw each other often, whenever there was an outing or a party, an event, or hell, even when they needed babysitting on occasion. Though, they weren’t their go-to. It was some woman in the neighborhood that had been watching Zach since he was a baby and she was in high school. Now she was probably mid-twenties…college maybe.

Owen would probably think she was hot.

She rolled her eyes at that very possible fact, but then the police station came into view. She pulled into the parking lot, and all thought of Owen Grady slipped away. Her mind went blank, and her heart was racing.

She approached the front desk, where a young receptionist looked up at her expectantly.

“Can I help you?” she asked, softly.

“I- uh…” Claire cleared her throat. “I spoke with an Officer Young on the phone, regarding a Scott and Karen Mitchell?”

A knowing look colored the young receptionist’s face.

“The car accident.”

Claire nodded.

“One moment. I’ll get him right away.”

“Thank you.”

She wandered a little bit away from the front desk, as the receptionist made a call to the officer at his desk. Now memories from her time with Karen, her sister, her big sister washed over her, and she couldn’t hold it in now, she started to cry, covering her mouth so her sound wouldn’t escalate and echo in the lobby.

“Miss Dearing?”

She inhaled sharply, wiped away her tears and faced the tall man approaching her with a badge on his chest.

“Yes?”

“Why don’t we sit down and talk?” He gestured to some chairs just down the hall.

Claire nodded and followed him there. She listened to him talk, only half-focusing until he got to the point of what he wanted from her and exactly where thing stood.

“Now, we need numbers for the nearest next of kin. Can you supply those?”

“Well, I’m the next of kin f-for Karen.” She swallowed. “She’s my sister. I can get Scott’s too though, yes, of course. Yes…” she trailed off. “How did you say the car flipped? It flipped when it hit the… They have two kids, Zach, he’s almost ten, and Gray just turned one. Were they- Were they in the car when it-”

“No,” he said. “Both children were in the care of a babysitter at the time of the accident.”

Claire closed her eyes briefly, relieved. At least there was that.

“So, the officer placed them with CPS for the night.”

Child Protective Services.

She swallowed hard. She hated that.

“They’re perfectly fine.” He paused. “It’s where they take cases like this.”

“Cases like this?” She held her breath.

“Orphaned children.”

And there it was. He’d said it before. He must’ve. But maybe she just didn’t want to hear it. But that was the reality. Scott and Karen, her sister, her big sister, the mother of her nephews, and her rock, her whole world…they were dead.

She nodded and the officer took a step back.

“I’ll give you some time.”

He turned and returned to his desk, whispering to the receptionist something. Claire didn’t care what. She was overcome totally and completely by grief. The tears fell. She ran to the bathroom and fell apart, sobs wracking her body, and she was totally and completely alone.

She should call her mother, who she would no doubt have to comfort, and she couldn’t do it. She couldn’t do that tonight. She needed someone to hold her.

What felt like hours later, she emerged, her eyes red and her cheeks stinging with the dampness she’d rubbed against to keep the tears from falling.

And that was when she saw him.

They didn’t say a word. No words needed to be exchanged. He saw her face, and he just knew.

They walked towards each other until there was hardly any space between them, and she fell into his arms. Shock rattling through him, all Owen could think to do was wrap his arms around her as he fought to process the news.

“Owen,” she sobbed, tears flying freely again.

“I know,” he said weakly. He wrapped his arms tighter around her, seeking comfort for himself as well. “I’m here.”

…

Later that night, Owen and Claire drove to Karen and Scott’s house and opened the dark, empty house. Flicking on the light switch was almost worse than keeping it off. Flooded with memories and pictures that made things worse before they would ever get better.

Claire distracted herself by calling CPS and yelling at them until she was blue in the face, but it didn’t matter.

“They say we can’t see them tonight,” she said, furious as she flung the phone onto the couch. “Not till tomorrow at 8am.”

Owen nodded.

“Well, maybe we should stay here tonight, for when they call in the morning.”

Claire sighed.

“Yeah, I should probably call my parents. They’ll want to-” She reached for the phone again, but Owen stopped her.

“Claire.”

She inhaled and exhaled deeply.

“It’s late. Don’t wake them up for this.”

She nodded, the burden lifting off her shoulder, at least for now.

“I’ll take the guest room. You want to take…the um…the main bedroom?”

“Nah.” He shook his head. “I’ll be okay down here.”

“Right. Okay.”

“Goodnight, Claire.”

She paused on her way to the stairs.

“Thanks, Owen, for being here.”

He forced the tiniest smile in his grief.

“Of course.”

“Goodnight.”

She disappeared into the hall, then made her way to the stairs. It was an effort to take each step, to pass the room that used to belong to her sister and her brother-in-law. And when she made it to the bed in the guest room, she collapsed.

She cried until she couldn’t cry anymore, and then she lay awake till morning.

#clawen #clawen fanfiction #backtothestart02 fanfiction #life with you and me #chapter 2

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christopher-bangnaldoskzz · 2 years

Text

HI DADDY - 2

Chan x Reader Female

Word count: 1.9k

Genre:🌶️

Summary: You fell pregnant at 18 to your high school crush. what happens when 6 years later he returns. Will everything work out or will it be a disaster.

Trigger warning: please remember this is a fiction and the characters are just that fictional. If you are sensitive to swearing or sexual content please do not read my stories…… some of my story’s do hold scenes from kdarams Sorry in advance if you don’t like it but I though they were cute, other than that please enjoy.

So you and Sarah are at the entertainment centre. You are met by a man in a suit holding a sign saying Luca. He ran to the man and said: "That's me. I’m Luca.”

The man looked down at Luca as you went away. You walked backstage, and Luca looked at you and asked, "You got backstage passes?" Knowing Luca was happy made your night. The man knocked on the stage door and announced, "You're the best mother ever." You all walked in and chan, and the boys were doing their hair and makeup.

“Excuse me,” Chan said to the makeup artist. He walked up to you and hugged you tight.

“So happy you guys could make it” he got down on one knee to talk to Luca.

“You must be Luca. I have heard so much about you” he smiled

Luca gave him the biggest hug, and you could see Chris about to cry.

“Hi, can we talk?" You said when he got up

“Sure, no problem” he smiled

“Sarah, could you take care of him for me?"

“Sure, Luca, did you want to see if these guys know poker?” She said, putting her hand out. He was so excited to see them.

“I want to tell him tonight?” You said to Chris

“Can we do it after the concert?"

“Of course, but we need to do it together,” you said smiling.

“Are you sure?” He said

As you handed Luca's birth certificate to him, you said, "I'm so sure... I brought you something."

"Wow, is this Luca's?" he asked, opening the certificate.

“Open it” you said rushing him

He started crying. I could see tears hitting the paper. “are you for real…you gave him my last name?”

“Of course, I keep reading.” You said pointing to the paper

“You put my name on the birth certificate?” He said surprised

"Mmmmmmm," you nod, “you're his dad.”

“Why? Why would you show me this now?"

“Because I love you too… and I’m so so sorry I made you feel forgotten and like you didn’t matter." You started to cry.

He hugged you while you both cried.

…..

So the concert continued on, and Luca danced like a maniac. Sarah and Yourself were dancing with him.

Chris delivered this speech and cried, saying he was happy to be back and glad for his family. The fact that you took Lucia away made you feel guilty.

You honestly started balling your eyes out, and Luca was like, “mummy are you okay?” You had to walk off.

“Oh, I feel horrible," you told Sarah.

“What for? You had to keep it secret."

“No, I was such a cunt to him the other day, and he’s always been so nice,” You cried

“Oh well, all you can do is apologise, I guess,” She said while hugging you, then you heard Chan coming towards Sarah.

“Is she ok?" He asked Sarah as she let go of you and Chris hugged her.

He rubbed your back as you cried into his chest.

“Something about being a cunt to you,” Sarah said, walking away with Luca.

“Huh? Why are you crying? It’s all good,” he said

“I feel so horrible about Wednesday... I was an asshole for no reason.” You sobbed.

“I said it’s all good, don’t worry about it,” he said lifting your chin to look at your face. He smiled and wiped the tears away.

“Oh god, you’re so sweet....why can’t you be an asshole?" You laughed.

"It's not in my blood,” he smiled.

Chris sat Luca down and told him everything and you know what Luca said?

“Mum and dad, I know I heard you talking on the lawn.”

The way he said it was so sassy that you couldn't stop laughing. Chan just looked at you and said, "He is your kid."

He was like, “ I won’t say anything, I promise,” and hugged both of you. Chris was looking at you like, what the fuck do I do?

You mouthed "hug him" and he hugged him, and Sarah was like “Awwww” and started crying.

“Sarah, why are you crying?" You laughed.

“That’s his baby,” she continued

“That is his baby,” Changbin said, hugging Sarah while crying.

Chan suggested he stay in Australia for a month after finishing the tour, he told JYP. He agreed to just one month, that was all. You became nervous because he would be staying at your house the whole time.

................................................................................................................................

Okay, the first week, Chan slept on a blow-up mattress in the lounge room, but he got a sore back. As you had a king bed, you negotiated with him that he could sleep in it as long as he did not do anything funny.

So it was 11 pm, and you were sleeping. Chan came in and popped two pills.

“What are those?” You looked up from your phone.

“Sleeping pills,” he says, flinging the cover over.

“you still take sleeping pills? That’s not good for you,” you were concerned he had been taking sleeping pills for as long as you had known him.

“I have to. I can’t sleep.” He looked sad.

“How many do you take?" You questioned.

“Depends, sometimes one, maybe two, maybe four at most.” He shrugged.

“You can’t take that shit every night. It’s not healthy.” You reply

“Okay, okay, god, I’ll try to stop,” he said, lying down.

So you crawl into bed and turn the lamp off. Chris still has his on but after a few minutes he switches it off.

“How long till you fall asleep?” You were curious.

"Maybe 30 minutes,” he said, closing his eyes.

You just lay there looking at him, not in a creepy way but in a concerned way. He had been taking sleeping pills for almost 13 years. Why did his doctors keep prescribing them to him? Mostly you didn’t want him to stop breathing.

He opened his eyes and looked back at you for a split second. “Oh shit, this is awkward.“ You thought to yourself.

He looks at you for 30 seconds, before resting his right hand on your cheek, his thumb caressing your jawline. He then lifts his body slightly so his head rests on his opposite hand. You continue to look at him as he moves his face down to your lips slowly.

“What are yo….” Before you could finish the sentence.

“Shhhhh” he moved his hand from your cheek to under your chin lifting your face slightly to make eye contact with him. He had such confidence that this was not the Chris you used to know you always made the first move.

Chris leans in and his plump lips crash into yours. Once you got over the shock you began to work in sync with his lips. Your hands wrapped around his neck deepening the kiss. Chris after a minute or two of making out pulled away.

A smile spread across his face as he fell asleep. "Wow...that's what I've been waiting for six years." he said while his hand fell to your waist.

……..

So the following day, you and Sarah are in the kitchen making eggs, and Chris walks out.

“Morning, how did you sleep?" You smiled and handed him a plate.

“Man, maybe you’re right. I need to stop taking those sleeping pills. They're making me have weird dreams,” he said, scratching his neck.

“Oh, okay, what about?" You said, acting clueless.

He looked at you trying to sus you out to see if you remembered anything in case it was a dream.

“Oh, I don't remember," he replied.

You knew he was lying.

We ate breakfast together in silence, and I left for work.

……

So about a week had passed by, and he started to act normal again, but he stuck to his side of the bed.

One Monday you got a call from Lucas's school because they wanted to meet with you regarding something that had happened. Chan would usually drop you off and pick you up from work to use the car during the day.

Once work was over, you walked out into the car park with some work friends. Chris looked so good in his sleeveless shirt and stippled jeans.

Kayla your work friend said, “who’s that?" You look up, and Chris waves at you.

“Oh, that’s Chris. He’s coming with me to school for Luca.”

“Is he your boyfriend?” Kayla asked.

“Oh no, that’s Lucas, dad,” You laughed “sorry, I forgot people don’t know…. He’s here for like a month to catch up with Luca, then he has to go back to Korea.” Kayla just looked at you confused you never told anyone you knew Lucas dad.

“Oh okay” she laughed “we’ll he looks nice…. Have fun,” she said.

You walked over to the car, and he opened the door. The girls stared at us, waving and saying "bye-bye." You were so embarrassed.

“They seem nice,” Chris smiled

“Huh? Oh yeah, they are alright. Did you change your hair?” You asked, pulling his hair to the side and out of his eyes.

“Huh? Yeah, I did. Does it look okay?” He gulped suddenly, becoming nervous.

“Yeah, looks good,” you said, putting your seatbelt on.

“Thanks,” he said driving away.

…….

So you get to the building, and you both walk into the office, and the principal is like

“Miss Y/L/N…. Would you like to come in” Chris stood up with you.

The principal went, “sorry sir, but it’s parents only” he looked at you and said to her

“Hi… nice to meet you. I’m Luca's dad”

“I am so sorry, sir. Lucas's application stated he has no father,” she looked embarrassed.

“Sorry…. It’s a long story,” you said embarrassed.

She showed you into the room, and both you and Chris sat down on the couch.

“So I bring you here today as Luca, over the last couple of days, has said some inappropriate things to other students.” This was serious. Chris shuffled closer to you as he knew you could get heated sometimes.

Chan looks at you, and you look confused.

"How so," you replied in a defensive tone. You knew you raised a respectful young man who when pushed could react….but only when pushed

“Well, there is a young boy named Harry.. who, from what the teacher said, bullies Luca and takes his lunch.” The principal explained.

“Oh, okay, Luca has told me about him… I’m not sure what the problem is?” You tense.

You felt Chris move his hand to your waist.

“Well, the other day…. Lucas said, you told him to call Harry, and I quote, MY MUM TOLD ME TO TELL YOU THAT YOUR A BIG FAT FUCKING CUNT” she stared straight at you, and you tried so hard to hold back the laughter. Chris squeezed your waist something he would do when you were teenagers to signal to calm down.

You composed yourself and said, “I’m sorry, but the kid ate two other kids' lunches as well as Lucas…. It’s not a lie. "He is a big fat fucking cunt” Chris squeezed you again.

“I’m sorry… I think what Y/N is trying to say is we are sorry Luca used that kind of language, and we will talk to him about other options." Chris looked at you as he talked to the principal.

“Thank you, Chris… I’m glad one of you is mature” she smiled. You just looked at Chris, and you could tell he was trying to hold back his laughter as he remembered you telling Luca to say it.

You both walked out of the office, and as we walked up the ramp, Harry and his mum walked past. She almost took chan out while you came down the ramp.

Chan looked at you and went, “I’m assuming that’s Harry and his mum?” He said moving out of the way.

“Charming family right?” You laughed.

“They look lovely” he said sarcastically.

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anemoxlys · 2 years

Text

Part 2

Part 1:

Warnings: character death, swearing/bad language (Gimli) insecure reader

—————————

“He has never loved me, I left a long time ago.” You murmured regretfully before a smile appeared back into your face as you saw a party of dwarves walking your way. “Ada, who are they?” You asked softly, turning to face your father Elrond. “That my daughter is Gimli.” He answered, a smile also gracing his face. “Y/N.” A less welcoming voice spoke from behind you, causing your blood to run cold. “Legolas.” You returned, refusing to turn and look at the elf. “I must be off father, Arwen is looking for me.” You mutter before hastily walking away from the group.

“I choose a mortal life.” You heard your sister murmur, her hand in Aragon’s.

You were happy for her, truly. Just you recalled the same look of love and admiration on your face once as you stared at Thranduil as he too once held you in his arms. A single tear slipped down your cheek before you turned and walked away. Soon the single year was met with plenty more as you began to silently sob, walking towards the gardens you had slowly grown to love.

“My lady!” You heard your handmaiden call from below you. “Yes Almir?” You called back, wiping your eyes as you gracefully climbed down the tree. “Your father is searching for you ma'am. He wishes for you to join him during the meeting.” She explained, her eyes scanning your tear stained cheeks with a look of slight concern. Nodding slightly you quickly made your way towards your father’s balcony.

You heard faint voices coming from the balcony as you stepped into the daylight but all you could see was Legolas staring at you. Staring at the ground, you made your way slowly over to where your father sat. “Apologies for the delay father, Almir took a while to find me and I was not aware of a council meeting.” You muttered before moving to stand beside his seat. “Who’s this lovely lass?” You heard the dwarf exclaim, drawing most of the council’s attention to yourself. “This is my daughter Y/N of Rivendell.” Elrond stated before the human continued his lengthy speech.

You grew ever more cautious as the human drew closer and closer to the ring sat in the middle of the table until his fingertips nearly grazed the top and Gandalf began to speak in a foreign tongue. Glancing at your father, you saw him sigh slightly and place a hand over his temples. That was when the headache started, wincing slightly you felt your head begin to spin. Stumbling slightly, you felt a hand touch your arm, looking over you saw Thranduil. A tear escaped your eye before you murmured something and walked away only to be stopped by your father stepping in your path. “I saw him. He was here!” You whisper, your hands trembling slightly as you spoke. “It was just in your head onya, he can never hurt you again.” Elrond murmured, pressing a kiss to your forehead before you both stepped back into the circle of the council.

A short speech later and you had not entirely accidentally signed yourself up to join the, newly named and formed, fellowship of the ring.

“The ring bearer is setting out on his quest for mount doom.” You heard your father announce before he turned to you. “Take care my darling child. Return to me.” He murmured, his forehead pressing against your own as you said your goodbyes. A single glance to your sister was all you managed before you were made to leave your home once more.

Smiling sadly you watched Merry and Pippin fight with the human you now knew as Boromir. “I do miss GreenWood at times like this.” You whispered to yourself before you were unwelcomely interrupted by Legolas, “we do not wish for whores to miss or return our lands.” He hissed as you once again looked at the ground in shame. “Why do you let him say such things?” You heard Aragorn’s voice ask as he came to sit beside you. “I do not wish to cause him any more pain, nor his father whom I have and will continue to love until the end of my days.” You sighed mournfully. “And why have you not told him of this?” He continued to ask. “I do not know, why do you continue to love my sister even though my father doesn’t accept it?” You questioned, making the ranger fall silent. “Love is a meddlesome creature Aragorn, I am just happy you and Arwen have found each other and you are content being with her.” You finished, a small smile appearing on your lips, not quite reaching your eyes, as you calmly walked away.

However just as you found an isolated clearing, the sounds of screaming forced you to turn back. “Quickly duck!” You heard Gandalf bellow before you ran for shelter.

Under a Boulder is where you found temporary sanctuary from the ravens of Saruman, however much to your misfortune you lay beside Legolas and Aragorn who, although for reasons much closely related to hatred, his eyes fixed on you.

“Valar please…” you began to pray, your gaze fixed on a pouch around your waist. “And what’s in that!” Legolas once again sighed angrily. When no response left your lips he hastily reached for it and, after grabbing it from your waist, immediately opened it and stared at its contents. “Letters?” He questioned before opening one of them. “This is my father’s writing. Why have you kept them?” He questioned, his voice raiding in volume as he grew more and more frustrated. “My friend, I believe you know why.” You heard Aragorn mutter as he came to stand beside Legolas. “But you…” he began before you looked up at him, “I would never. Could never, I have loved your father for years since my leaving and I will continue to do so no matter how it pains me to do so.” You murmured sadly. “But… the witness, the rumours. They saw you!” He exclaimed. “On that day I spent it in the gardens with Tauriel. I never left the palace.” You spoke, surprisingly calmly. “My lady…” Legolas murmured before he fell silent briefly, “I vow you will survive and I will make this right.” He uttered, his eyes glowing with determination. “I have no worries concerning that Legolas, I only wish your father shared the sentiment.” “I believe he still does mellen.” Came the reply. “Then I too vow that you will return safely to your father, I would hate it for you to never return.” You agreed, your hands moving to cup Legolas’s face as you brought your foreheads together.

Moria had been hard for you all. The loss of Gandalf had hit very close to home for everyone of you. Reaching shakily into your pouch and bringing out a necklace. “Gandalf gave this to me many years ago. It was an engagement present.” You sadly laughed, tears forming in your eyes. “Come we must leave.” Aragorn muttered, reaching for your hand and squeezing it slightly as you both began to walk onwards.

“Welcome Legolas son of Thranduil and Y/N daughter of Elrond, we welcome you.” You heard a strange voice murmur as arrows appeared from the bushes, all pointed at you. Choosing to remain beside Gimli as you spoke with the man in charge, you could hear the mutters and whispers of the fellow soldiers. Most were talking about the ‘evil’ they sensed with the young hobbit Frodo but naturally there was some who chose to speak of you and Legolas. They spoke, unfortunately, loudest.

“Lady Y/N.” You heard Galadriel’s voice speak to you, her voice echoing inside your head. “You are filled with such despair and sadness. It pains me to see an old friend in such agony.” She continued as she stepped out from the shadows. “My lady.” You greeted, Boeing slightly as she smiled in return. “Me lady!” You heard Gimli’s greeting as the echos of the remainders of your party copied.

Night had long since fallen but sleep did not chase after you. Seeing Galadriel walk past you stood and walked down the stairs beside her in silence. “Do you wish to see him mellen?” She asked, her voice gently breaking the silence. You simply nodded in reply and hesitantly gazed into the bowl.

Staring into the pool, you saw memories of your past love, days spent laughing in the markets of GreenWood and hours spent in pleasant silence, disturbed only by the murmurs of affection from either one of you. Then you saw an unfamiliar memory, Thranduil sat in his throne a friend gracing his still perfect features. Legolas soon walks in and speaks something so quietly you cannot hear what is being said. The expression of your lover says it all as his eyes widen in pleasant surprise as you saw someone walk through the doors towards him. All goes black as the vision comes to a sharp halt. “He is in love with another.” You quietly murmur. “Mellen…” Galadriel sighed empathetically as she brought you in for a tight hug, “all will end well for you I am certain of it.” She whispers into your cheek as she presses a soft kiss to your skin. Tears began to freely fall down your cheeks as you quietly sobbed into her arms.

Current word count: 1808

Thank you for reading please leave any questions, tips or advice in the comments have a great day/night

He’s actually so stunning

Lee Pace>>>

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buckystevelove · 3 years

Text

My Brightest Star

Pairing: Bucky x Reader

Word count: 2708

Warning: ANGST and fluff

A/N: This is my longest work. Please leave comments. Ask, submissions and requests are open.

A week, that’s how long has passed since Bucky’s world felt apart. He should have known, his whole life has been full of tragedy, one after the other. He had 7 years of happiness and peace, he will have to come to terms with the fact that maybe those years would be the only ones in his long and sad life that he would known what real and complete happiness really is.

He met you 7 years ago in a coffee shop, you accidentally tripped and spilled all your coffee in him. You apologized over and over again, Bucky couldn’t care less about the hot drink splatted all over his body, he was so enthralled over the beautiful woman standing in front of him, for years he thought that he would never get love, but you managed to prove him wrong. He claims that it was love at first sight, he simply knew that you were his soul mate.

After the incident, you bought his coffee as a symbol of forgiveness, though he really didn’t care. You exchanged names and phone numbers. Just a few hours later you received a massage from Bucky, inviting you to go for dinner the next day. Soon, one date turn to seeing each other every time you could. You felt for him, and hard. Eventually you met all of his friends, you became a great friend with Wanda and Nat. They would invite you to all the girl nights they had. You got along with Sam, always joking around and making pranks, same with Tony. You also became best friend with Steve, you had a strong relationship with him besides yours with Bucky. You too were like siblings, he always claimed that you were his little sister, and warned Bucky never harm you, or he would have to face the consequences.

Nobody was surprise nor bother when you moved to the compound with Bucky. Everyone was super exited to have you closer, that made Bucky a bit jealous.

You and Bucky were attached to the hip. One year into your relationship, he knew that he was going to marry you, you were going to be the mother of his children. He wanted to spend the rest of his life with you. You were the one, so he asked you to marry him.

It was so beautiful, he took you on a trip to the museum, your favorite place to spend the time. When you were in the sculptures room the kneeled and said; “YN, since the moment I saw you I knew that you were the one, I knew that I was going to marry you, and all you have done is prove me right. You are the love of my life, my partner, my best friend I can no longer imagine a future in which you are not in it, because YOU are my FUTURE. You have been the light at the end of the tunnel, you have brought me happiness, love I thought I no longer deserved after all the awful things I had done, you helped name realized who the real James Buchanan Barnes is, and who I want him to be. I want to be your husband because I love you so much. You are my entire world YN. So, would you marry me?”

At the end of his speech both of you had tears in your checks, you throw yourself over him and said yes over and over again, you were beaming.

6 months after that, many hours of planning and cake tasting, you and Bucky had the most beautiful fall wedding. It was perfect. Your family and the team was there, everyone was so happy for the two of you.

When the time to say the vowels came you couldn’t be more thrilled, you have been writing them for so long.

“James Buchanan Barnes, you are the love of my life. You have been the one who has taught me what love really is, what it is like to love someone with every single atom in my body. You have taught me what is like to be completely and uoughterly happy, that is how I feel when ever I am with you. James, when we met you told me that you only saw yourself as a monster, as the vilan of many people’s lives, but baby, you are my knight in shining armor, you are absolutely everything to me. You are the brightest star in my universe, the one and only. I want to spend the rest of my life with you, I want to tell you and show you how much I love you every day, I want you to feel how much I love you even after we are death. I want to keep loving you and choosing you a hundred of lives after this. Because Bucky, MY LOVE FOR YOU WILL NEVER END.”

At the end both of you were crying, among many other of your guests.

Your honeymoon was perfect. Tony paid the two of you a 3 weeks trip around Europe. Nine months later, you had your gorgeous daughter, Rebecca. She looked exactly like you, but her eyes, she had the most beautiful blue eyes just like her father. The three of you were the definition of a perfect family, you and Bucky did ocationaly fight like all healthy couples do, but your life was great. Your house was so full of love and happiness.

Bucky was so thankful to you, you had given him all he could ever dreamed for in life and more.

The three of you spent all the time you could together, you went to the park and had movie nights, went of family trips and spent lazy Sunday mornings in bed together. You wanted Becca to feel and understand what a loving home was, since you didn’t had one. You wanted her to feel the love you and Bucky had for her.

“Becca, Bucky, you two know you are the most important people in my life right. I love the two of you so so much. You are the ones that make me happy. You are my greatest treasures.” You said to your husband and 5 year old daughter one afternoon, while cuddling in the couch together.

“I love you too mommy, you too daddy. You are the best parents in the world, thank you.” She said kissing yours and Bucky’s face, making you giggle.

“You dolls are my everything. I love you.” He said before attacking the two of you with tickles, and whispering to your ear. “Thanks doll, for all this.”

The day had started like any other Tuesday would, you woke up after your alarm. Waking up Bucky with kisses and loving touches, after he woke up he heads to shower while you got Becca ready. Once the two of them were dressed, Bucky went to the kitchen to make breakfast wihle you got ready. The three of you ate together, you heard how Becca´s best friend was going to have a party next Saturday and you needed to buy her a present. You decided to go to the mall with her after classes and maybe have a girl’s day and do you nails. That made her smile so bright, which was what you loved the most about your life, that it was full of happiness.

After eating, you said goodbye to Bucky and Rebecca, he was going to take her to school and then go to the Avengers compound to train some new recruits, while you went to your office.

Bucky’s day went normal, as any other day would go, he did some training and hanged out with Sam and Steve. When 4pm came around the received a call from Becca´s school, her teacher told him that she was still there. You never came pick her up, he didn´t know why you were late. You always told him if your meeting was going to be longer so someone would pick your daughter from school.

“Sorry man.” He told Steve at the middle of the meeting. “Apparently YN never went to pick Rebecca from school she is there by herself, I really need to go. I also need to see what happened to YN. She is not picking up her phone.” Bucky said standing up from his chair.

“Sure pal, everything good with her?” Steve said a bit worry, he didn´t want his best friend to be in panic.

“I hope so.” He said walking to the door, but before he could reach it his phone rang again.

Steve just stood there, and watched how the color of his best friends face went completely white, then Bucky’s knees failed and he felt to the floor. Tears running down his cheeks, his face was shaking. He was wordless. Sentences couldn´t form in his mouth. Steve was next to him in second, he took the phone from his hand.

That when he heard him scream, he screamed as if he was dying, painful and horrible screams.

“Excuse me.” Steve said through the phone. “This is Steve Rogers. What happened?” He asked, though he already had an idea of what had happened.

“I am so sorry Sir, but I regret to inform you that Mrs. Barnes had a car accident today. She arrived to the New York Presbyterian Hospital at 2:36pm, she immediately went to surgery. She didn´t make it, she was called at 3:49pm. I am so sorry, but we need her husband to come.”

Steve hanged up the phone, he had tears in his eyes, he was about to cry. He had lost his best friend, but he needed to be strong for the man that was like a brother to him, to his nice.

Bucky was in the floor, sobbing and screaming. He went and called for Nat. She enter and saw the state in which Bucky was, then she saw the tears in Steve´s eyes.

“What happened?” She asked in panic.

“I… he…N-Nat” he mumbled between sobs. “Can you please look for Rebecca at school? Please.”

Nat realized, she immediately shook her head in disbelieve, “no, no, no,”

“Nat, please. Someone needs to be with her.” Steve managed to say. She wiped her tears and left the room.

Steve was in the floor hugging his best friend while he cried his eyes out, he was no longer screaming.

“I am sorry buddy, I am so sorry.” He said to his friend. “I know how you feel, just let it all out. But later you need to be strong for your daughter. She just lost her mother, she will need her dad. She needs you to be there for her, but now. I am here for you.”

“Not her, please not her. She is perfect Steve, I can’t, I love her, we can’t lose her.” He sobbed and screamed. “We were supposed to spend the rest of our lives together, the two of us.”

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When he calmed down, they went to the hospital. A drunk driver had crashed against your car in a traffic light. He died immediately.

Becca slept in Nat´s room. Bucky slept in his old room in the compound, he couldn’t go to your home. Too many memories. He couldn’t face his daughter, he would broke in front of her, he needed to be strong. He cried himself to sleep that day.

He next day was awful, he needed to explain to her 5 year old baby, that her mother would never hug her again. He couldn’t even began to comprehend that.

“Becca, baby. I need to talk to you.” He said the next morning the compounds living room, all the other Avengers were in the hospital helping Bucky prepare every detail for the funeral, Steve was the only one there, next to Bucky and Becca. In case either of them needed him.

“Daddy, why did we slept here?” She asked frowning her eyebrows, just like her dad. “Where is mommy? We were supposed to have a girl´s day yesterday.”

That made Bucky tear a few tears which he rapidly cleaned.

“Babydoll, its because…” Bucky mad a pause and looked through the windows. “Mommy had an accident, and she will never come again.”

Becca made a confused face.

“Why? Can´t you just put her a bad-aid like you do to me when I have accident?” She asked in all her innocence, which made Bucky’s strength fall. He quickly enveloped her in his arms.

“That is the thing baby, she had a big accident, she is gone.” He started to sob again, so did Steve.

Becca began to stroke her father’s hair. “We will see her daddy, someday, but I am really going to miss her.” She started to cry and hug her dad.

“I want my mommy, dad.”

“So do I honey.”

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The funeral was beautiful, full with YN´s family and friends. They all told beautiful stories and tried to remember the amazing person YN was. Bucky couldn’t talk, he had so many things to say, none of them were for this people to hear, they were for his love.

A week had passed since you awful dead, Bucky stayed at the compound, he couldn’t go home, he also needed help with Becca. He could barely managed to take care of himself.

He was in his bed, looking at the celling, numb. He know the needed to stand up and shower, he needed to get up and care of his baby, but she was the carbon copy of you. It was like looking at you, it hurt, it really hurt. Lying there he heard some knocking at his door. Then Steve came..

“Hey pal, the lawyer came today, he left the will and this letter. She wrote it you when you guys had Rebecca.”

“Thanks, just leave it there.” He said gesturing to his night stand.

When Steve left he got up and grabbed the letter, it had his name in your beautiful calligraphy.

Bucky,

My love, I hope that you never have to open this letter, but if you do, I want you to know that you made me the happiest woman alive. In all the galaxies we know that exist, in all the universe that may. I was the happiest, all thanks to you. You teached me what the meaning for being alive really meant, you showed me so many incredible and beautiful things, and you gave me our most amazing gift, our daughter Rebecca, she is the tangible evidence of our love.

If the time in which you have to open this letter comes, know that you did everything you could. Under any circumstances think that this was your fault, it wasn´t.

I love you so much Bucky, you have really no idea, and I know you loved me just as much, that is why I am asking you one last favor.

Please don´t close yourself, don´t let yourself return to the man you were before be met, not that he was any less amazing, but he was lonely. I want you to continue living your life to the fullest. I know I can´t ask you to not miss me or forget me, I don’t want that. I want you to remember my memory and cherish it. I want you to show all then wonders of the world to sweet Becca. Please never let her forget that she was the most important person in my life besides you.

I want the two of you to continue to love, and let yourselves be love. I love you with all my heart, and every single atom in my body.

Don’t forget me my brightest star, YN.

After reading that Bucky cleaned his cheeks.

“I will always love you.” He kissed the letter and placed it in his nightstand. He got up and went to find his daughter.

“I love you baby, and so did you mother. You are our greatest creations.” He no longer had you here, so he was going to spend all his breathing moments showing her how much he loved her, he was the only part left in this world of YN, and she was that greatest gift she could have left him.

He would continue to love you long after you are gone. For ever, til the end of times.

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A/N: I cried so hard writing this. I am so sorry, but I hope you like it. I really appreciate feedback.

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babyboibucky · 3 years

Text

Undeserving (Deserve Better Part 2)

Pairing: Bucky Barnes x Reader

Summary: You confront Bucky about his decision to abandon you.

Word Count: 2,868

Warnings: More angst lmao I’m sorry for this

A/N: Honestly struggled with this because 1) I couldn’t decide on how to end it and 2) I was pressured from the feedback I got from Deserve Better. I’m not entirely happy with how this came out and initially, I planned on doing an epilogue for those who’d prefer a different ending but decided against it. Anyway, if you guys have more questions about this, send me an ask! I’d love to discuss more about this lol luv u all as always. Feedbacks are highly appreciated and I hope this was good enough for y’all who enjoyed Deserve Better xoxo

Deserve Better || Undeserving || Deserve The Best

MAIN MASTERLIST

You chose to stay.

Despite seeing the love of your life— whom you had waited for years— in the arms of another, you stayed at the gala. It was after all, to honor Steve’s legacy and you respected him enough not to walk away and miss out on the speeches given by people dearest to him, Bucky included of course.

You weren’t sure if he had seen you and the way your eyes brimmed with tears when everything finally made sense to you. He wasn’t far from you when you stopped in your tracks, mouth parting as a soft whimper escaped past your lips.

You had never imagined that heartbreak could be so physically painful. And it wasn’t the regular pain you’d feel after an intense workout or when you scraped your knee. The hurt was different, like your heart was being tightly squeezed into someone else’s palm. It was choking you, constricting you of oxygen as if you were drowning. No matter how much you tried to reach the surface, the pain just kept on pulling you down until there was nothing but darkness and well, pain.

Once the program was over and all the guests were left to mingle, you carefully slipped out of the crowd. Mindlessly, you walked and walked and walked until your feet began to hurt from the heels you were wearing. When the cold and crisp air of the evening embraced you, it was then that you realized that you reached the compound’s garden, just behind the main hall where the gala was happening.

The quiet gave you time to think and process everything that had happened. Bucky left to find himself and to become better, that he did. And you waited only to discover that he’d been back for quite a while now but chose to be with another.

As you looked out in front of you, your vision turned blurry as a new wave of tears escaped your eyes. Your grief had resurfaced after repressing it for so, so long. Grief from Bucky’s goodbye, from his absence and from waiting, grief from seeing him with someone else; no matter the cause, all in all it was grief nonetheless.

Bucky’s soft voice calling your name echoed in the evening air, it was so soft that you almost thought that you were hallucinating. But then he’d called you again, using the pet name that used to make your stomach flip and your heart to flutter. It still had the same effect now, you realized, only that it came along with an immense amount of pain that made your blood boil.

Hearing Bucky call you that, it almost felt like poison. It was quiet, gentle even but it left a bitter taste in your mouth as you felt its venom run through your veins until you could no longer feel anything but pain.

“Doll—“

“Don’t.” you seethed and turned around, pointing a shaky finger right at Bucky. “Don’t call me that when you’re with someone else, James.”

Bucky flinched at the way you had addressed him. You saw how his face faltered upon seeing you like this. His vibranium arm was restless against his side, as if he wanted to reach out to you but knew better than to do so.

“I waited for you!” you spat.

If he found somebody else to become better for, he could at least let you know. But he didn’t and you needed to know why he chose to abandon you. You needed it so badly, for your own peace of mind. For closure. You deserved that, at least.

“I’m sorry, I—“

“No, you don’t get to say your side until I’m done with mine!” you insisted. “I have every right to be selfish right now. I can choose to lash out on you or refuse to even listen to whatever your reason is for abandoning me no matter how valid it is. I fucking deserve that, Bucky.”

Bucky closed his mouth and nodded; you hated how he was staring at you as if he just lost his moonlight, as if he still loved you. If he did, you wouldn’t be confronting him like this and you wouldn’t have seen him with someone else.

“When Steve told me that you disappeared, when it felt like there was no way to bring everyone back, I waited. It didn’t feel right for me to move on from you just like that and deep inside I knew that you were going to return. Five years, Buck. I waited five years for nothing.” you said quietly, recalling how devastating those five years were.

You didn’t know what would happen then, nobody knew. Would they still come back? The chances were slim and yet you trusted your gut and decided to remain hopeful. It wasn’t easy to wait for something or someone that may never come back. But you still did and it never even crossed your mind that you may just be wasting your time.

You let out a breathy chuckle, “And then you came back and I felt alive again. But then you said goodbye.” you pursed your lips in an attempt to hold back your tears but to no avail.

It took you a while to collect yourself and Bucky let you, until you spoke again and told him how much it destroyed you when he walked away from you.

“Everyone else told me that I shouldn’t wait. Not again after those five years. But it felt easier this time around because you told me you wanted to get better. For me. And I was excited, Bucky.” you told him with a chuckle. “I was excited to see your return. I looked forward to how we’d spend our time together when you come back, if you’d cut your hair. If you’d wear the same cologne that I loved.”

A smile tugged at your lips as you recalled those times you daydreamed about Bucky’s return. The wait was agonizing but it gave you something to look forward to. At least you weren’t waiting for nothing anymore. Bucky was leaving but only temporarily, you were sure he’d come back. But the smile vanished as soon as it appeared and before you knew it, you were sobbing again.

“And now you’re back and so much better. But you aren’t mine anymore.”

At this point, your grief had consumed you both physically and mentally. You knees wobbled but you didn’t hit the ground, no. Instead, there was warmth against your skin followed by the smell of a certain cologne, enveloping the air around you. Bucky caught you in his arms and he held you tight as you cried into him.

“Shh, doll. I’m here now.” he whispered before pressing a kiss onto your crown.

As much as it felt right to be in Bucky’s embrace, it wasn’t enough to overcome the betrayal he did. You groaned in frustration and pushed him away, stepping back and hugging yourself instead.

“Why?” you asked quietly.

“I need to know why and how we came to this.” you asked, almost begged for Bucky to give you the closure you badly needed.

Bucky ran a hand through his hair as he paced before you, his cheeks stained with his own tears. “I came back for you.” he said.

You frowned, “When?”

“I couldn’t wait to see you again and as soon as I got back, I went straight to your office. But then you weren’t working there anymore, I found out that you finally landed your dream job at the law firm.” he said with a small smile. “I was so proud when I heard that. I was supposed to go to your apartment but something came up and I needed to meet with Sam first. Weekend came and I was on my way to your place when I saw you. And you were with someone else and you looked....happier, the happiest I’d seen you.”

Something clicked and you quickly shook your head, “Andy. No, he’s not...we were never together. This is a misunderstanding, Bucky. He and I were never—“

“I know.” Bucky admitted.

“What?” You asked, voice soft from utter confusion.

“You looked happy with him, not because of him. I know you weren’t in love with him because if you were, you would have looked at him the same way you’re looking at me now.” He explained sadly.

Hearing Bucky’s explanation made you angrier. If he knew that, then why did he still leave? What reason could be bigger than that to make Bucky wake up one day and decide that he no longer wants to come back to you?

If he knew you loved him so much to actually wait, why did he leave you like that?

Your brows creased, “If that’s not the reason, then what?”

Bucky shrugged, “I realized that you didn’t deserve me. I left to better myself for you, god I really did. But when I saw you and how you managed to be successful without me by your side, I figured that you were better off without me. I thought I got better, but seeing you again looking so beautiful, happy and just...maybe I’ll never be the right one for you.”

You bitterly chuckled at Bucky’s revelation, “This doesn’t make any sense to me, Bucky. You chose to abandon me because you thought I was happier without you?”

You felt offended that Bucky even thought of that. Did he not trust you when you told him you’d wait for him? He didn’t even show up to tell you that, to give you the chance to reassure him how much you love him. He just decided that it was better for him to leave you hanging?

“That’s bullshit, Bucky.” you spat. “You left me hanging because you thought you were weighing me down and the next time I see you, you’re with Sharon now. Who by the way, used to date your best friend. I don’t understand any of this.” you told him.

Bucky looked at the ground as he evened out his breathing. There were a few seconds of silence between the two of you. Only heavy breaths and the distant sound of the music from the gala lingered in the air. It was almost comforting. Almost.

“Sharon and I...it wasn’t easy for us when Steve left. It was something that we both had in common. We wanted to fix ourselves and in the process we just...it happened. I didn’t mean for it but it just happened.”

“Are you fucking kidding me?”

The pain was replaced with grief and then anger. A little sympathy was thrown in the mix too upon hearing Bucky’s reason but now you were back to square one. Pain.

“You worried for her when Steve left but didn’t worry about me when you chose to leave me hanging? You told me you needed to fix yourself alone because you didn’t want to hurt me in the process of doing so. Guess what, Bucky? You hurt me all the same. Even more so when you chose to stay for Sharon and when you allowed her to help you fix yourself.”

Bucky remained silent as he simply gazed at you and let you say your piece. You just couldn’t understand where he truly was coming from. You knew about his insecurities and you accepted each one of them. You’d wholeheartedly accepted Bucky from the moment you knew you loved him, that included his flaws and demons, even on days he hated himself.

“Don’t shut me out like that again, please?” You asked Bucky, when he finally let you inside his room after isolating himself for days.

He had those days, when he couldn’t bring himself to come out and just...live. He’d push people away and torture himself with negative thoughts. But you always stayed no matter what.

“‘m sorry doll, I just...sometimes...I love you so much but sometimes I feel like I don’t have enough of it to actually show you. And you don’t deserve that.” He explained.

You smiled and cupped his cheek, “That’s okay, Bucky. I love you and the amount of love I have for you is more than enough for both of us.”

Was your love not enough for him all along? For him not to consider how you would feel if he just decided not to come home to you anymore? You shouldn’t be blaming yourself for everything, you did your part. But you couldn’t help but wonder whether it was because of you that Bucky chose to walk away.

“I love you, I really do. And you deserve the best and I’m not...that. I chose to let you go so you can have that.”

“I don’t need the best version of you, Bucky!” You quickly cut him off. “I just need you.” You added.

When Bucky decided to leave to get better, you let him even though you hated to see him walk away. You’d be selfish not to, especially when Bucky was finally free to decide things for himself. It was for the best, but honestly speaking, you didn’t want a better version of him.

Whether it was the Winter Soldier or James Buchanan Barnes, whatever version of him he’d give to you, you love Bucky all the same.

You love Bucky so much that it was so painful for you to hear that he actually thought you’d be happier without him.

“You don’t deserve someone as damaged as me. Even if I got better, I’m still struggling and I don’t want to make things hard for you.” Bucky said.

“And you don’t get to decide what you think I deserve! You don’t get to abandon me like I was nothing, like we were nothing to you.” You seethed.

Bucky looked away, blinking his tears away as he tried to compose himself. His jaw tensed as he looked at you with an apologetic gaze.

“You shouldn’t have waited for me. You didn’t have to.” He said the same thing to you when he left, and it hurt just as much.

“I love you. I’ll wait, Bucky.” You murmured and tugged at his hand before he could even let you go.

Bucky smiled sadly at you, “You don’t have to, doll.”

You shook your head and brought Bucky’s hand to your lips as you cried, “I want to. And I will.”

“I know. But in all those years you were gone, I woke up each day and chose to wait for you. I always chose you, Bucky.” You said with a sad smile.

You stumbled a bit and lifted your dress enough to reveal your bleeding foot. You’d walked that long, for your feet to get wounded and ironically, you couldn’t feel anything but the pain of seeing Bucky again. He tried to approach you and help you out but you waved a hand and kept him at an arm’s length away from you. You removed your shoes and straightened up, looking at Bucky and his ocean blue eyes for one last time.

“I’m sorry if you felt like you weren’t enough. You’re more than enough for me, Bucky. I really thought that I could love and fight for the both of us, but I guess not.”

Bucky didn’t say anything else, and you hoped he would. It might have been pathetic of you to wish that he’d come back to you, but you really hoped he would say something to fight for you. He didn’t and that was enough for you to make a decision.

“Goodbye, Bucky.”

You bit your lower lip as you turned around, holding back your tears as you jogged back into the gala. You walked past everyone in the crowd in a hurry, wanting to head home as quickly as possible. And then you came face to face with someone you weren’t prepared to confront.

It’s as if time stopped when you saw her, Sharon. She must have found out about your presence. Did she know of Bucky’s decision to abandon you? You wondered how she helped Bucky better himself, why he let her stay as he fixed himself.

Why Bucky chose to be with her instead of coming home to you.

You could feel your chest constrict again, the pain continuing to consume you whole. If you stayed any longer, you were afraid you might break.

“Do you love him?” You asked her softly.

Without missing a beat, Sharon nodded her head. “I do.” She whispered.

“How much?” You asked again.

“There’s nothing I wouldn’t do for him.” Sharon responded and you could feel the sincerity in her statement.

The way she said it wasn’t meant to hurt you nor mock you. It was reassuring, in fact. Like she was making you a promise that she was going to take good care of Bucky the same way you did. Maybe even more. You swallowed as you nodded, forcing a small smile before looking away to wipe a tear that slipped.

“That’s good.” You simply said. “Because I’d do anything for him too.”

Anything. Even if that meant walking away and giving up on a battle that you’d already lost the moment Bucky decided to abandon you.

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falcqns · 3 years

Text

he's gone for good.

pairing: sub!Bucky x Reader

summary: Bucky informs you about Steve leaving.

warnings: angst, sub!Bucky, crying Bucky, mentions of violence.

a/n: hope you enjoy!

when you opened the door, and was greeted with a crying Bucky, you had no idea what to do.

you may had known Bucky for many years, but he was never open emotionally with you. in front of you, at least.

you two had met when you were studying abroad in Bucharest, and ended up moving in right beside him. you knew who he was right away, and you also knew that he was most likely on the run from HYDRA and S.H.I.E.L.D., so you never revealed that you knew who he was.

a week into living there, you found out he had nightmares, but it wasn't until a month later that you found the perfect cure for them, home cooked food.

you were up late doing some research for a paper, when you heard the beginnings of a nightmare. you usually heard the terror and scream filled ends, not the beginnings, but you listened anyways.

he was calling out for someone. it took you a few seconds to decode what and who he was calling out for, but when you realized, your heart broke for him. he was calling out for his mom. his calls became louder and more desperate, before coming to a head with a shout, then sobs of heartbreak. it made you think of your mom, hundreds of miles away. it wasn't until you remembered that he was born in 1917, so his mom was definitely dead, that you moved from your bed.

you ran into the kitchen and pulled out all the ingredients for some chocolate chip cookies. eating homemade cookies always soothed all your pain when you were little, and you didn't want to think about the kind of food HYDRA fed him on a daily basis, if they fed him at all. you also knew he most likely wasn't eating properly here, as you’d see him come back everyday with plums, along with some type of street food that he found.

didn't matter what the street food was, he always had plums accompanying it. a quick google search told you that plums helped improve memory, so that was that question answered. an hour later, and the cookies were done, and loaded into a spare Tupperware that you had lying around, with a note on top letting hi know that if he ever needed to talk, you were there.

you placed it outside his door, knocked, and retreated to your unit just in time. thanks to an abandoned body mirror that sat opposite the wall that separated the two units, you got to see the smile that spread on his face when he saw the cookies and read the letter.

after that day, it became tradition.

every time he would have a nightmare, you would give him some type of food. whether it was chicken parm, French onion soup, cookies, cake, donuts, or even chicken nuggets and fries that you Uber Eat’d from McDonalds, you always made sure he was comforted.

it wasn't until a month before you were due to move back to your home country that you saw him face to face for the first time. you were bringing him some white chocolate macadamia nut cookies when he opened the door. he had a coat, hat, and leather gloves on, indicating he was going out.

he smiled and blushed, before speaking. “so you're the lovely lady that cooks for me,” he said, and you laughed before handing him the container with cookies.

“yes I am. I just made some more, actually.” you said with a smile as he took the box from you, and looked inside.

“well, thank you doll. these look absolutely delicious, I can't wait to try them.” he said with a smile and you felt your cheeks heat up.

he placed the box down on the table next to the door, and turned back to you.

“well, I'll let you get on with your day,” you said, as you turned to head back to your unit.

“actually,” he said, and you turned to face him. “I was just going to go on a walk since it was my day off today. do you maybe want to come with me?” he asked, and you felt butterflies form in your stomach as you nodded.

“sure! just let me grab my coat.” you said.

then, just like the cooking, the afternoon walk became tradition. you two would walk and talk about anything. whether it be work, school, or building drama, you always had something to talk about.

on a certain walk through a quiet little park, he confessed who he was, and was surprised when all you said was “I know.” he’d asked if you were afraid, and you said no. he’d asked if you were planning on turning him in, and you also said no.

you’d explained that it was obvious that HYDRA had control of him, and that everyone deserved a second chance. after your little speech, he’d kissed you, and asked you out on a date. you'd accepted, and started dating after your first date.

then, he was captured by S.H.I.E.L.D.. the two of you had been at the market together when he saw a newspaper saying that he had killed King T’Chaka with a bomb at the UN. he swore, and dragged you home. the two of you blew past your unit, and headed into his where you were faced with Steve Rogers. this didn't surprise you, he'd told you what he could remember about Steve, and you were expecting him to show up eventually, you just weren't expecting it to be so soon.

you could hear someone else, Sam, over Steve’s comm, and realized that there were police here, to capture Bucky. upon hearing this, Bucky shoved you out of the apartment, and down the hallway, with Steve following. he’d led you to a back entrance that you didn't even know was there, and told you tp leave the building until everything was over.

he gave you one last hug and kiss, and your first ‘I love you’, and he was gone.

you hadn't heard from him for 2 years, when you got a letter from him. according to the letter he had been seeking refuge in Wakanda, and had been freed of the Winter Soldier. he invited you to come and visit, and you did. you got to watch him tend to his goats (which he named after every avenger, even Tony) and interact with the Wakandan people, and the children. who knew a former brainwashed HYDRA assassin could be so sweet with young children? definitely not you.

then, just as you were preparing to leave and look for a farm where Bucky could continue to raise his goats and be with you, King T’Challa came to Bucky and gifted him a new arm, and informed him of a new fight. Bucky had begged you to leave, but you wouldn't have it. you had been working out and training since the day that you watched him and Steve fight against the police in Bucharest, wanting nothing more than to run in there and protect him.

so, you fought. it felt surreal to you to be fighting with the Avengers beside you, although there was no place you’d rather be. in that moment, as you were racing towards those “space dogs”, as Rocket had called them at one point, you didn't care if you lived or died, won or lost. you only cared about fighting beside the love of your life.

watching that same love of your life fade away to dust in a beautiful Wakandan forest broke you in two. you had just gotten him back, and you’d lost him again. you were trapped in your own head for days, wishing to dust away like him, just to be with him.

before you knew it, 5 years had passed, and you had joined the remaining Avengers. how you went from studying abroad in Bucharest, to being an Avenger, you had no idea, but you were grateful nonetheless. when Steve, Natasha, and Scott approached you with the possibility that you would be able to get Bucky back, you instantly accepted.

you joined Tony, Steve and Scott, and helped Steve in the fight against himself. when Tony failed to get the Tesseract the first time, you joined them on their journey into 1970, and was blown away. it wasn't exactly the time that Bucky and Steve were from, but it kind of felt like it in a way, and you instantly felt closer to Bucky, although Steve had to stop you from going to find Bucky, who was coincidentally only a few kilometres away at that point in time.

you fought with Steve and the rest of the Avengers against Thanos, and almost fainted from happiness when you saw your Bucky walk through the portal and run into your arms. you, once again, fought with the Avengers and Bucky to defeat Thanos once and for all.

then, Tony snapped his fingers, and your whole world changed. you didn't know it at that particular moment, but it did.

you attended Tony's funeral, and you and Bucky went home. a few days later, Bucky and Sam went to see Steve off to return the stones. you had no idea why, according to Bruce it would take about 5 seconds, but Bucky insisted that he needed to go, and said that he was sorry he couldn't join you on an afternoon walk, your first one with him in over seven years.

but, then he showed up at the door, tears streaming from his steel blue eyes, his cheeks puffy, and the smallest of sobs escaping from his rosy lips, and you knew something went wrong.

you pulled him into your apartment, and wrapped your arms around him. he nuzzled his face into your neck, and sobbed freely.

“what happened?” you asked. “did something happen to Steve?” at the mention of his best friend, Bucky sobbed harder, and your question was answered, albeit silently.

you pulled him into the bedroom, and stripped him from his clothes. you’d never dealt with a sobbing and heartbroken Bucky in person before, so you just went with what felt right.

you instructed him softly to go lay on the bed, and he nodded. you laid down on your side, and pulled him to lay on your chest. as your hands ran through his hair that was starting to curl slightly, you tried again.

“can you tell me what happened, honey?”

Bucky sniffled a few times and sat up. you did the same, and he fiddled with his metal fingers while he talked.

“y’know yesterday when Steve and I went out for lunch?” he asked, and you nodded. “well, he told me about your journey back to the 1970′s with him.”

you furrowed your brow in confusion, but nodded. “I-i guess he was dodging some workers or something because he hid in an office, an office that happened to belong to Peggy Carter. he said that he saw her through the glass, and that he realized that he could have the life with her that he’d always wanted, the Pym Particles safe in his pocket. he knew that he had to come back and bring everyone back, but then he was going to go back.” you didn't know what to think. that wasn't the Steve that you knew, the Steve that you had become family with over those horrible and painful five years.

“when he told me, I didn't really think he was going to do it.” Bucky said, his voice shaking. you wrapped your arms around his shoulders, and he rested his head against your chest.

“even when I watched him disappear on the tunnel platform I didn't believe it. then, he showed up again.” he said, almost whispering.

“he was old. like grey hair, wrinkles, all of it.” he managed to get out in between sobs that were growing louder. “t-thats when it hit me. that he left me, for he-” he tried to say, before his sobs started full force again, and you pulled him to lay on you. he had his head on your chest, and his body in between your legs.

his cries continued, and you knew there was no stopping them. he was heartbroken, and he had to work through his feelings, not ignore them.

he swallowed, and continued to explain. “he left me for the girl he kissed once. which is great, he deserves to be happy, but I need him. I'm finally completely free, and I don't have my childhood best friend anymore.” he sobbed out, and you started to rock your body slowly to soothe him.

you wanted to cry too. cry about the friend that you’d never get to see again, but you couldn't, not yet. Bucky was hurting way more than you were, and you could push your pain down until Bucky was okay. you cuddled him closer to you, and spoke into his hair.

“its okay, baby boy.” you said, and he nuzzled deeper into you, the stress and sadness melting away from his body. it would return later, but it was gone for the time being. he sighed in contentedness, and his tears slowly stopped. you kissed his forehead, and felt him smile.

you ran your hands through his locks for the millionth time, and hummed a slow tune to him to soothe him further. you felt his breathing even out, ad light snores escape his mouth, and you smiled.

at least for a while, he was at peace, a peace he hadn't had in a while.

#bucky barnes #bucky x female reader #fatws bucky #bucky fic #bucky imagine #bucky fanfic #bucky x you #bucky barnes x female reader #bucky barnes x y/n #bucky barnes x reader #bucky barnes fic #bucky barnes au #bucky barnes reader insert #bucky barnes fluff #sub!bucky

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niskoo · 3 years

Text

[02:00]

pairing: lee heeseung x reader

genre: angst, fluff, ....hurt comfort? idk

warnings: poor descriptions of a panic attack because i completely forgot what its like

word count: 1.3k words

a/n: hi hi!! this was (a bit late Jfbsjn) a request from @wonvelvet (thank you so much for requesting!! i love your writing <33) ALSO IT WAS SUPPOSED TO BE FLUFF BUT IDK HOW IT TURNED INTO THIS HAHA IM SORRY IT MIGHT BE RUSHED </333

networks: @enhypennetwork

For your whole life, numbers and brains defined you. At least, you thought it did. That’s just how your parents raised you, around exams and exams and education. Never have they at least considered your feelings. And neither did you.

Until you got to college and met the boy who accidentally spilled paint on your shoes, the boy who felt bad and quickly apologized, the boy who promised to exchange them for something. You thought it was simply silly, how could be so worked up over a pair of sneakers?

And as he took you out for a small treat ar a bakery, for the first time in your life, he asked for what you wanted. You furrowed your brows at this, claiming it was just pastries and he could pick anything out.

And as you took a bite in the donut, you observed as the boy’s expressions changed as he smiled in what seemed like pure bliss. You asked him why he was so happy, but you really didn’t expect for him to make a whole speech of why donuts bring the heavens down to earth.

You felt something there, you wanted to smile at his small presentation, you wanted to join in and ramble nonsense about a pastry.

Lee Heeseung brought colors to your life. Not long after the first bakery date, he asked you on a real one, where he would dress up and actually pick you up and all that jazz.

And now here you are, a year later, staying in the same apartment.

It was crazy, how he actually brought feeling into your life, when you were completely unaware of how much more you could enjoy life, instead of looking at numbers and meaningless information you probably wouldn’t use in the future.

Most of your experience with your boyfriend was happy. Most.

Now wasn’t one of those times.

Now was one of those rare times where you would find numbers and worksheets so difficult, where you would struggle and want to give up.

It was simply too much. Too many assignments, exams, projects, too much work.

You stare blankly at the open document in front of you, fingers hovering over the keyboard, grazing over the keys. You’ve been at it for hours now, typing potential pieces, before deleting it after realizing how ridiculous it sounded. You’ve never had such a hard time doing an assignment.

The white screen of your laptop practically glares at you, the two paragraphs of nonsense screaming how pathetic and useless you were.

You grunt, and quickly shut your computer down, slamming it shut. There’s a migraine grazing your mind, tired of staring into a bright screen for too long.

You trudge lazily onto the bed, patting the sheets, before plopping in next to your boyfriend with a groan.

Heeseung instantly wakes up at the dip of the bed, turning around to greet you. “Hey, you done with the report?” You stick your head back up from the pillow, shaking your head with a deep frown. Heeseung chuckles lightly at your response, nodding, before pulling you closer to him and under the blanket. “It’s okay, you can finish it later.”

You find yourself instantly dozing off in Heeseung’s embrace, sighing in bliss, before nuzzling your face into his neck, humming in agreement.

You don’t think about the unfinished document sitting on the study table, only about your boyfriend’s featherlight touch and light kisses on your hairline.

Though, a few hours after sleeping, you do find yourself suddenly awake, a deep heavy feeling in your chest. You sit up from Heeseung’s hold, eyes instantly trailing to your laptop on the study table. A sudden feeling of nausea and anxiety floods your body when you realize you had not even done half of your report.

Feeling overwhelmed, you crawl out of bed, hands shaking and footsteps slow as you approach your laptop. Your breaths soon grow shaky as well, as you open your computer and see all the reminders of all the assignments and exams you have yet to come.

Your eyes burn as you read through the list, the anxiousness spreading throughout your body in an overwhelmingly fast pace, thoughts of how you’re gonna fail clouding your mind. You step away from your laptop, stepping back, hands finding themselves shaking and holding onto the back of your head.

You’ve only had a panic attack around 2 times in your life, and every time you force yourself to focus on your breathing, just like father had said, but now all thats hazing and filling your mind is how much things you have undone, how much of a failure you are, how weak you can be.

Soon, soft sobs the air, tears smearing your face messily as you shut your eyes and focus on your thoughts, and your thoughts only.

You’re a failure. You can’t get anything done. You have so much to do. Why are you so weak? Why can’t you fulfill mother and father’s expectations? Why do you have to be so pathetic?

You don’t realize your boyfriend quickly getting out of bed at the sound of your sobs, rushing to hold your hands in his as he kneels in front of you.

“Hey, hey,” he mumbles, placing a hand on your cheek. You jolt at the touch, finally realizing Heeseung in front of you, a worried expression twisting his face. “What’s wrong, baby?”

You try to focus on his question.

Why are you worked up?

Your eyes trail to your open laptop on the table, blinking at the brightness. And then, you remember.

Quickly, you suck in a sob, attempting to stand up and walk to your laptop to finish everything, but a soft grab at your hand tugs you back gently, causing you to bump into Heeseung’s chest.

“Hey, no no, look at me. Y/n, please look at me.” Your blurry vision turns to him, his gaze, glazing with pure worry. You try to blink your tears away, only to have them fall down your cheeks. Heeseung instantly reaches up to brush them away with his thumb, caressing your cheek dearly. “You’re okay now, I promise. You’re with me.”

Heeseung, the boy who makes noodles for you when you stay up to do an assignment, the person who makes sure you get enough sleep, the first person who comforts you, the only person who cared for your feelings. Your breaths finally steady, mind focusing only on Heeseung, his soft gaze, furrowed eyebrows, gentle voice, even gentler touch, god how you would end up dead without him.

“You’re okay, everything is fine.”

Your eyes seem to long for something more than that from him, blinking up with a certain gloss that tugs on his heartstrings. As if to read your mind, your eyes, Heeseung tugs you closer to him, hands now caging your cheeks in his palms.

Heeseung takes your hands in his once more, sticking your palm out in front of him. He presses his own large palms against yours, aligning your fingers together. Your heart softens, softly linking your fingers together softly. His hands felt warm, comforting, as if to reassure you that he’s there for you, that he validates you and cares for you.

“You’re doing so well, I’m so proud of you. Can you tell me what’s wrong now, baby?”

You tell him what’s wrong, you tell him of your never ending stress of that week, sniffling softly every time you remember all your unfinished works. He reassures you that your own mental health matters much more, reassures you that you’re not pathetic, or weak, or a failure, but it’s human to not be able to handle so much.

Lee Heeseung, who painted your shoes and your life, who brought you pure happiness and comfort, you don’t think you could ever live a proper life without him.

A week later, 2 of your essays have an extended due date, you actually pass your exams, and best of all, you’re at a bakery, eating and talking nonsense about donuts bringing heaven down to earth with the only person who ever made you feel validated.

#enhypennetwork #lee heeseung #lee heeseung imagines #lee heeseung fluff #lee heeseung x reader #lee heeseung scenarios #lee heeseung blurbs #lee heeseung drabbles #lee heeseung angst #enhypen #enhypen imgaines #enhypen x reader #enhypen fluff #enhypen scenarios #enhypen blurbs #enhypen drabbles #enhypen angst

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high-functioning-lokipath · 3 years

Text

SH - Sherlock x Depressed!Reader - With a Little Help from My Friends - Words: 2,793

IMPORTANT A/N - PLEASE READ: As stated in the title, this story contains discussions of depression. There is mention of suicidal thought and self-harm. I personally don't think it's too intense in it's descriptions HOWEVER!!! If this will trigger you, for your own health and safety please do not read. My messages are always open if you'd like to talk. I wrote this partially based on my own feelings so I can understand to at least a degree. You're amazing and I love you all. As far as this story goes, just remember: it has a happy, very fluffy ending but it doesn't start that way. I hope you enjoy it, feel free to leave a comment!

Brief Backstory: Reader is friends with John and Sherlock. She is a nurse who works with John. The three met shortly after Sherlock came back. Sherlock and Reader have crushes on each other but won't admit to it. I think the story explains everything else.

"Y/N, I'm going to be honest," John said, putting his hand on your shoulder comfortingly. "I may have PTSD but I cannot fully put myself in your shoes. My depression is different than yours." You had called your best friend, John Watson, in a mild panic. You had been feeling depressed for some time, as he knew, but that day had been especially bad. There was no particular reason but your depression had gotten so intense that you knew you needed help to get past this particular wave. John invited you over to 221B, assuring you that his flatmate would be out for the next couple of hours. "As a doctor, I am going to prescribe you some medication. Lowest dose possible and only because I want to help you get some immediate relief but I know you do not want them to become permanent. Let's work on finding another solution for you, ok?"

"I don't know, John," you replied. You'd asked John to be your Doctor since you didn't go to one regularly and he didn't mind your irregular checkups. "I've tried just about everything. The only outlet that seems to help is writing and even then," you trailed off, trying not to cry again. "This feeling just won't go away and I don't even know why it's there in the first place. I just want it to stop."

"I think you should talk to Sherlock."

"What?" You squeaked. "Why in the world would I talk to Sherlock?"

"I can't tell you why, Y/N. As both your Doctor and Sherlock's, I have to respect certain amounts of patient confidentiality. However, as your friend, I think you should talk to him."

"I don't know."

"Trust me," He replied. Smirking slightly, he added, "Doctor's orders."

"Ok, John," you chuckled. He smiled and hugged you. "Thanks."

"Now how about we go and fill this prescription and then maybe get some ice cream?"

"Well, honestly," you sighed. "The ice cream sounds great but I didn't sleep well last night. I was actually wondering if I could just take a nap here for a bit. I sleep better here sometimes." You blushed but John nodded understandingly.

"Of course," He replied. "I'll run down to the drugstore and fill this for you. Meanwhile you get some rest. I'll let Sherlock know you're here just in case he ends up getting back before I do. Will you be ok by yourself?"

"Yeah," You smiled. "This is a safe space for me. I'll go grab a blanket. Thanks again."

"Don't mention it. Just remember, talk to him."

"I'll try."

About 15 minutes later, Sherlock arrived back at the flat. He'd gotten John's texts.

John: If you get home in the next 45 minutes, be quiet. Y/N is over and she's taking a nap. I have to run out for something.

Sherlock: Is everything ok? - SH

John: She said she had a bad night.

Sherlock: She must have had a reason to come over in the first place though. - SH

John: She's going to need to tell you that herself. Don't ask. Do you understand me? Let her tell you. Be nice, ok?

Sherlock: When am I not nice to Y/N? - SH

John: Ok, that is true. You like her too much to be rude to her. If you could just hold back your deductions for one second I will say this: you two have more in common than you think.

He hurried home, not to wake you up of course, but because he wanted to see you. If there was something seriously wrong, he wanted to try and brace himself for it first. He couldn't help the smile playing at the corner of his lips when he thought of you. You two were good friends, that much was obvious to everyone. But Sherlock could see the potential for something more. He liked you a lot. You were just as smart, sassy, and sarcastic as he was. But you also could be extremely kind and caring to others and especially to him. He still didn't quite understand why you cared for him so but he was grateful. Before he could dwell on that too much longer, he arrived at 221B.

He quietly slipped inside and smiled at what he saw. You were curled up on the couch, sleeping like a baby. Apparently, though, you'd kicked off the blanket you had grabbed. Instead of picking up the blanket, he decided to take off his long coat and carefully lay that over you. You quickly cuddled into the warm fabric, unconsciously taking a deep breath, inhaling his unique signature left behind on the coat. Satisfied with what he'd done, he took off his suit jacket and went to the kitchen to prepare some tea for when you woke up. He knew you had a favorite tea and, unless John moved it or drank it all, there still would be some in the cupboard.

You woke to the smell of your favorite tea and a hushed exclamation from the kitchen. Opening your eyes slowly you saw Sherlock in at the counter trying to set up a tray with the teapot and cups. Recognizing your surroundings a bit more, you realized what was on top of you. Sherlock was just about to bring out the tray but you decided to pretend you were still asleep. The chances of fooling the Detective were low, but you wanted to try.

"There," He whispered to himself, setting the tray on the coffee table. You could hear him settling down on his chair, likely getting into his 'palace pose' as you called it. For a moment you were happy. You had actually gotten some quality sleep, you were currently cuddled up in Sherlock's famous coat and Sherlock had even made you tea. But that feeling quickly faded. Tears threatened to spill out of your still closed eyes as self-deprecating thoughts filled your mind.

'John probably told him to make me tea. He probably covered me with his coat so I wasn't as much of a distraction. He doesn't want me here. He never does. Why does he even tolerate my presence? He probably wishes we'd never met,' You thought. Your mind was going a million miles an hour and gaining. Without your notice, the tears began rolling down your cheeks and quiet sobs escaped your lips.

"Y/N?" Sherlock whispered. You're eyes shot open. You hadn't heard him get up. Now he was kneeling right next to you, one hand hovering over your arm. "Are you ok?"

"Oh, Sherlock!" You cried. "I-I wish I knew."

"C'mere," he said, motioning for you to sit up. Once you did so, he pulled you into a tight hug.

"What's this for?"

"You always give me and John a hug when you see us. You haven't done so for the past 5 days. I-" he paused briefly before lowering his voice and continuing. "I missed it."

"Oh." You weren't quite sure how to reply to that. You leaned into his embrace, letting yourself get lost in the moment.

"Y/N? Is there something I can do to help?"

"How much did John tell you?" You asked. You wouldn't have been mad exactly if John had told Sherlock to talk to you, but you wanted to think Sherlock was reaching out on his own.

"He told me you had a bad night."

"That's all?" You asked, surprised. You pulled away slightly and stared into his eyes. Sherlock nodded, frowning slightly as he tried to deduce you.

"Why are you afraid to talk to me?" You turned away, embarrassed and unsure what to say. "Be honest."

"I don't want you to make fun of me. I have-" You took a deep breath, steeling your nerves and preparing to just jump right in. "I have been extremely depressed lately and I didn't want to hear another speech about how all I need to do is exercise and eat right and stop thinking about sad things. Well you know what? I can't stop it! I can't help it if I feel like a useless pile of trash that should be thrown in the bin and burned." By the time you finished your little tirade, you'd gotten up and started pacing the floor. Then you turned and faced Sherlock. His expression was neutral but there was an obvious sadness in his eyes, one you didn't expect to see. It wasn't of pity. If you had seen that you also would have given up on the conversation. No, it was almost an understanding, an empathy. His eyes were actually glistening with tears.

"Have you ever felt like," he paused, voice unsteady. "Like giving up?" He whispered, unable to hold eye contact. You nodded silently. He got up slowly and walked towards you. At first, you thought he would hug you again but then he started unbuttoning his shirt.

"Uh, Sherlock?"

"Just wait a moment. I want to show you something." He carefully shrugged off the purple shirt that you, admittedly, loved so much and tossed it on the chair. "Only one person knows about this. You will be the second. You remember I told you about Moriarty's network?"

"Yes, the day we met. I asked you about your work, a simple question. And I got an answer that lasted 3 hours." Sherlock chuckled dryly.

"Yeah, sorry about that."

"Oh, no. Please don't apologise. I-" You sighed, rubbing your forehead. "I tend to make jokes when I'm nervous."

"I know." He smiled at you with, yet again, a completely unreadable expression. "You remember though." You nodded, opting to stay silent as he explained. "Well, those 2 years dismantling his network weren't easy. Not physically and certainly not emotionally. As a result of the different missions, I received many wounds on my body in various locations. I was," He paused, took a deep breath, and closed his eyes. "I was depressed, guilt-stricken and suicidal. I figured I had hurt my friends enough. If they thought I was dead maybe I should just go on with it."

"What changed your mind?"

"I didn't want to do it on a mission. I wanted to see home again one more time. So to temporarily relieve the pain I," He sighed. Well, I wouldn't let my wounds heal. I'd pick at them. Mycroft finally convinced me to come back officially because he needed my help. I never told him about this. I think he knows but we don't discuss it." He looked down, obviously embarrassed and feeling more emotionally naked than physically. "You can look," he said. It was as if he'd read your mind. You were trying to be respectful and not stare but you realized that's what he wanted to show you. You had, on occasion, seen him shirtless before but you had never realized how bad some of the scars were.

"Sherlock, I-I don't know what to say. I-" You were completely shocked. Not offended. But actually comforted that he understood you. "Thank you," You finally said.

"Actually I wanted to thank you. I didn't just show you this to prove that I understand your feelings." You looked at him confused. "The day we met. You were leaving work, correct?" You nodded.

"It had been my first day there. John had been happy with my work and requested that I stay assigned to his office permanently. John had already finished up and headed home but there was some paperwork I had to finish so I was leaving about an hour late. Come to think of it, John said he had plans with you that evening. Why were you there?"

"That's what I wanted to tell you. I met you less than a month after I came back. I had still been quite depressed so I was still picking at my injuries. That day had been a bad day for me. So I cancelled my plans with John and I decided to go back to where I started this whole mess and finish it."

"Wait, are you telling me that-"

"You saved my life." Sherlock took one of your hands in his own and held it tightly. "I had memorized the work schedules of most everyone there and knew how to slip in unnoticed."

"But you didn't factor in me."

"Correct. When I ran into you, quite literally in fact, as I was entering the building, I was surprised. Not just by your presence but by what I deduced about you. You intrigued me. I had to find out more about you so I invited you to have a cup of coffee with me."

"Which turned into dinner." Sherlock nodded. "And since you were so intrigued by me, you forgot all about that."

"In a manner of speaking. You weren't a cure-all, mind you. You helped, though, by giving me a new mystery to investigate: you. That night, when I got home, I told John everything. He helped me too and when I mentioned you he couldn't stop singing your praises. He is very proud of you and your work you know."

"Yeah, I guess so," You replied, a little embarrassed. "Thank you, Sherlock. I'm sorry that you went through all that, but, I'm glad I have someone who understands. And I'm glad you're here to help me."

"Me too, Y/N. Me too," He replied.

"Can I, um, can I have another hug?" You asked, blushing and smiling. Sherlock rolled his eyes.

"If you must," He sighed, holding his arms out. Any other day, you would have thought he genuinely didn't want personal contact. But today you realized he was simply teasing. You wrapped your arms around his waist and leaned your head on his chest. You felt him relax as he leaned forward a little to cocoon you in his arms. "I care about you, Y/N. I don't care about many people but you mean so much to me. I-" You looked up at him and pressed a finger to his lips to quiet him.

"You don't have to say it, Sherlock. I know." He smiled and looked somewhat relieved. You knew he wasn't good with feelings and that was fine with you. "I love you too."

"I wanted to be the first one to say that," He pouted. You chuckled softly and booped his nose.

"You already have." He smiled and kissed your forehead lightly.

"I know this won't fix everything right away. I know you'll still have bad days. But I wanted you to know you could come to me too."

"I know. Thank you again, Sherlock." At that moment, John walked in with a bag from the store.

"Oh, hello!" He chirped, happy to see you hadn't gotten into a yelling match. Then he noticed Sherlock's shirt, or rather, lack thereof. "So, uh," He stuttered, unsure of what to say. "What should I do with this?"

"First of all, thank you, John, for giving me the guts to talk to him about this. And second, I think I'll give it a try. You know, to try and prevent a really bad day when you guys aren't available or if talking still isn't enough. But for today I think I'll be alright," You said, turning to John with a smile.

"Well, I'm glad. So did you just talk about that or did he finally tell you that he's had the biggest schoolboy crush on you from the moment he met you?"

"John!" Sherlock yelled. You laughed loudly.

"Not in those words exactly, John," You replied. "Don't worry," You added, turning to Sherlock and ruffling his curls. "Your secret's safe with me."

"Good. Now if you don't mind, I need your input on this case."

"Me?" You asked, quite surprised.

"Yes," He said as if it was obvious. "You're a woman after all!"

"And that is important because?"

"The killer was a woman obviously but I can't understand why she would do it!" The two of you went off into your own little world, completely ignoring John as he cooked dinner.

John: Ok, mates, get your tuxs out. Won't be long now.

Greg: He finally proposed? 😀

John: Not yet, give it a week.

Mycroft: John, you forget I monitor his spending habits.

John: And?

Mycroft: He's had a ring purchased for some time now.

Greg: 3 days tops.💍

Mycroft: I would estimate about 3 days as well, Detective Inspector.

Greg: We're in a Group Text. Talking about our friend like a bunch of teenage girls at a slumber party. I think you can call me Greg.

Mycroft: If I must.

John: So, girls, will you help me make the plans?

Mycroft: Of course. He is blood after all.

Greg: Count me in! Wouldn't miss it! 🕵️👰

Sherlock BBC Taglist

@lucywrites02

@delightfulheartdream

@bartv21

@another-crazy-fangirl

@ladylulu143

@gaitwae

@for-hearthand-home

#sherlock #sherlock bbc #sherlock imagine #sherlock fanfic #sherlock x reader #sherlock x y/n #sherlock oneshot #depression #ptsd #mentions of torture #self harm discussion #potentially triggering #trigger warning #TW #anxiety #good friends #john watson #mycroft holmes #greg lestrade

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shinkun · 4 years

Text

bloom: part 1/2 (18+)

aizawa shouta | eraserhead x student!reader

[ read part 2 here ]

word count: 3.4k

genre: alpha/omega, omegaverse, m/f, afab reader, student/teacher, smut with little plot

A late-blooming student finds herself trapped in the school, yearning for someone to ease her unfamiliar, painful urges.

warnings: 18+, smut, oral, fingering, cunnilingus

notes: Hello, just as a warning, this is my first time in many years posting any written work so I'm pretty rusty and self-conscious about it (please be gentle!) Also - my first time doing any form of a/b/o, so I hope it's okay!

Aizawa just released something feral in me that made me want to write a lengthy, lusty fiction about him.

This is Part 1 of 2 of this fiction. I wanted to see if there was any reception or interest in this piece before sharing the final part.

All characters are 18+. Reader is a mature student presumably finishing her final semester of school, or attending an extra year.

Anyway, please enjoy!

- - - - -

Aizawa gave a hefty groan, pinching the skin on the bridge of his nose. A nagging stress entered the back of his mind as he proceeded to the opposite side of the door.

When your classmate had cornered him in his office earlier, wailing about how “Y/N doesn’t want to come out! She said she feels too sick to go to practice!” He already knew what he was in for.

“Alright, I’ll go see what's wrong…” Aizawa nonchalantly replied, waving the boy away. “Go outside and start without her.” He commanded, not letting him get another word in. The student gave a compliant but nervous nod before exiting the room.

The professor let out a sigh, perking his ear up to the door. He hesitantly raised his knuckles up to the surface, knocking on it with little force, but enough that it could be heard from the other side. He held his breath for a moment. A sweet, tantalizing scent crept from beneath the barrier between him and his student.

“Don’t come in!!” Shouted a voice laced with panic in reply to the knock.

“Don’t worry, it’s me.” Aizawa said, lowering his palm to the handle of the locker room. He didn’t need to speak his name for you to know. He was patient, letting you bask in the silence for a moment. The scent emitting from the room made a couple beads of sweat roll down the back of his neck, but he was able to shake it off.

“I can’t let you.. see me like this…” Your tone was shaky and barely audible, but he’d caught it.

“I can help you.” He persisted to push the handle downward.

The bond you’d grown with your teacher in your three years at UA was strong and trusting. You knew that any advice he was willing to offer you would be right. He was always right. You were happy to have a mentor so willing to sacrifice his time and listen to you when you needed it, and this was no exception.

Aizawa delicately pushed the door open, only an inch into it before the odor was able to escape, already knocking him back; angelic, rosey scents filling his nostrils. Saliva pooled underneath the back of his tongue as he took the fragrance in. He shut his eyes and let out another soft huff before propping the door open with one foot. He could sense your panic rising as he shuffled forward.

“...I promise you’ll be okay.” He assured you, his hand curling around the frame. He continued to stay cautious and non-threatening, making sure you had enough time to prepare for his entry.

“I don’t want you to see me so..” you hesitated, attempting to stiffen a cry building up in your throat, “..weak.” The word rolled off your tongue like it was filth.

Aizawa entered the room, seemingly unphased by the aura of hormones that was now engulfing him. He gently let the door slide closed behind him, carefully locking it for any students that dared to interrupt them. A small but caring smirk graced his face as he looked before him.

He saw you curled up in the back corner of the changeroom, sitting on a bench with your knees tucked into your chest. You held the bunched up top to your gym uniform, hugging it to the flushed skin of your torso for safety, your chest covered only by a tightly binding sports bra. You sunk your head down, trying not to make eye contact with the teacher as he proceeded forward. He gingerly perched himself on the bench next to you, leaving a comfortable amount of space, before bending forward to look at you.

“Hey..” His hair curtained around his face as he leaned forward, softly cupping the opposite side of your face in his hand. He pulled your head over to look at him. The unexpected touch made you squirm, squeezing your eyes closed, but you refused to fight his caress. “You’re the strongest person I know.” His thumb massaged your cheek up and down. Your bottom lip quivered, still attempting to fight the surge of emotions that were coursing through you as you finally met his gaze. Your eyes brimming with tears, making your vision blurry, as you continued to choke them back. It was simple, but his words meant a lot.

You and him both knew that you had a complicated relationship with your femininity. You saw it as a burden, getting in the way from people taking you seriously. You blocked it out in any way you could, to reflect a more intimidating, headstrong persona. Focusing on close-combat studies and fighting techniques, convincing the staff to let you wear the boy’s uniform, attending all the extra curricular sporting events - the reason you were even here on a weekend to begin with. It wasn’t just a means of coming off as adrogynous though, you genuinely enjoyed these things.

“How can I be strong if I’m...” You looked away, afraid that admitting you were an Omega out loud would somehow make it worse. You didn’t want to come to terms with it.

“...C’mere kid.” He removed his hand from your face while straightening up, leaning his back against the wall behind him. His arm raised, placing it on your shoulder to pull you into his chest for a gentle embrace.

You’d been close to Aizawa before, but never anything like this. Playful jabs here and there, sarcastic shoves in the hallway, there was even that time he had to step in to use his binding cloth to stop you from beating on some punk that made fun of your quirk - but this tender feeling he was sharing was a whole new territory.

You took it in, allowing some of the pent up tears to escape from your eyes. A quiet sob forced itself out of your throat, your body vibrating with each cry. Aizawa rubbed your back, slowly, carefully, letting you bask in the feelings. The fear that you had reverberated throughout the room was beginning to subside, and he could tell. You laid against the man in silence for a moment, the heavy thumping of his heart lulling your anxieties. You breathed in gradually, putting your sniveling to rest, but as you did, you noticed something off.

A flush of red emanated from your face as your nose raised slightly gravitating toward Aizawa’s head. A waft of strong musk filled your senses. It was savory, and heavy, and…“Hnghh.” A breathy sigh escaped your mouth as your hand gripped the fabric of the teacher’s shirt. You had little control over your next movement, stretching forward to nuzzle your face against his neck, taking in as much of the aroma as you could. Now that you’d let your defenses down, Aizawa's dominant atmosphere was beginning to encapsulate you.

“Whoa there.” He let out a chuckle but continued to let you explore, eventually expecting this kind of reaction to his presence. He gracefully shifted his hand, placing it above your hip, both to keep you stable as you moved, and to give him the pleasure of being able to embrace the smooth, supple flesh.

“I’m...sorry..” You said, beginning to retreat from him as the realisation of what you were doing began to sink in. “Oh, oh no.. I’m sorry..!” Your heart fluttered as you pulled back to your safe spot on the bench.

He gave his head a shake and continued to give you your space. “No need to be sorry.” He assured you, scratching the back of his head. His voice was tender and dreamy to your ears, it sent goosebumps down your arms. Suddenly sitting in a lecture just to listen to your teacher’s dark, gritty voice rant about hero politics sounded appealing. Admittedly this brief embrace made the resistance to act on his urges much harder than before, but he persisted.

Suddenly you let out an aching gasp. You pulled your body toward yourself, your arm reaching around your abdomen as you felt that intense pressure building up inside your gut again, tinges of pain and aching threatening your core. You’d felt this earlier when you had the room to yourself. It made you hot, your breath beginning to pick up as your body reeled in a feverish sweat. You didn’t want him to see you like this and now that your guard was down, it was taking control.

“Hurt…. it hu..rts..” You managed to spit out. Shouta cocked his head to the side.

“Is this your first time..?” He planted his hand on your back once more, making sure you knew his company was welcoming. All you could do was let out a quick nod. You squeezed your legs together, feeling an intense heat present itself in your center, your gasps becoming more hefty and impossible to contain.

“Wow, a late bloomer.” Aizawa strategically pondered for a moment, “Well, I should go inform Recovery Girl of how you’r-”

“..No!” You cut him off before he could finish, a tremble in your voice. “Please, can you...” Embarrassment took over causing your speech to trail off, your arm shakely reaching out and clenching around the sleeve beside his hand. Your desires were continuing to take hold and Aizawa’s scent was becoming more and more irresistible as time went on, “..can you help me?”

The edge of his mouth curled up into a smile, disguising itself behind his shield of dark locks. Just as he’d expected.

Now, this wasn’t his first time dealing with a student in heat. Although the population of Omegas was on the lower side, there had been a few students in his years of teaching that had to get medicated and sent home for a few days to deal with their inflamed, unpredictable hormones. And professors, especially Alpha professors, were instructed on the responsibility of containing those natural urges and how to offer students help when they were in their most vulnerable state.

He did genuinely want to help. Seeing your pleas to get rid of this nasty heat made his heart ache and he didn’t want to deny you the option for any outside aid, but he knew you would place trust in him and he was willing to offer it.

Without answering Aizawa leaned forward. He curled his other hand up behind your head, letting his fingers trail through your hair to embrace your scalp. Immediately a shiver fell down your spine as he bent over you; first planting a kiss on your forehead, then he trailed downward, peppering a couple kisses on your tear-stained cheek. The weight of your head cradled into his hand as he continued, his mouth trailing down the length of your neck, his tongue messaging down the length of your skin. Your breathing increased as you let out a cute whimper, your core pulsated. He then paused just above your shoulder, letting in a deep inhale. Your scent was enchanting, sweet, and made his head spin. He dared to let his teeth graze that special spot, smirked, and then placed one final peck there before abruptly pushing his mouth against yours. You immediately felt a rush of heat rise into your stomach as his lips collided with yours. They were so soft and experienced, but juxtaposed by the rough facial hair that scraped against your chin.

Even though it was you who’d requested it, you were having a tough time wrapping your head around the order of events that lead you here. Finding it difficult to reciprocate the kiss, he began to ease his tongue inside your mouth. Your eyebrows raised, but eyes remaining sealed shut as the twitching muscle explored your mouth, the roughness of his flesh against yours causing you to feel slick drip between your thighs.

You pulled your mouth away releasing an overwhelmed heave, a string of saliva still leaving you connected to the man.

His eyes furrowed, a worrying expression plastered his face making sure you were okay.

“..I forgot to...breathe.” A rosy tint burned your cheeks before you both let out a small chuckle that eased the tension. He then placed his forehead against yours.

“Keep going..?” At this point he was probably too far gone but he thought he’d at least give you the false sense of reassurance.

Despite the flustering heat that Aizawa stirred into you from his kisses, the pain in your curve was urging on to the point of becoming unbearable. Your hands trembled but quickly grabbed his chest to pull him back into the embrace. He took this as a ‘yes’ and fell back into the deep kiss, proceeding to cup his hand around your left breast. He kneaded the bosom in his hand before trailing his mouth down your neck once again, this time pulling and suckling at the skin, leaving playful little bites - but not enough to bruise. His hands trailed down to the edge of your bra. You bit down on your lip as he yanked it upward and over your head.

A nearly inaudible “Wow..” escaped from his mouth as he leaned back to take your figure in, not sure if it was meant for your ears to hear. Your defenseless upper half was paler than usual and coated with a perspiring sheen due to your sickly urges.

“Don’t stare..” You grumbled, refusing to meet his eyes as his hand regained its place against your chest. He was shocked you were able to contain them within the bounds of a thin fabriced sports bra all the time, let alone while they were aching and swelling from your heat. You did a very good job of keeping it that way.

He smirked once more before lowering his head, taking the erect pink bud between his lips, lapping his tongue over it again and again. You shuddered as he sucked it into his mouth, his opposite hand fondling the other. But no matter how much he kissed and caressed your shivering body, it wasn’t satisfying the heavy hunger sweltering in the pits of your core. “Please..” You whined above his head, frustratingly clenching your fingers into your palms, “Mister Aizawa, please...I can’t wait anymore.”

Aizawa pulled his mouth away, nuzzling his face between your chest for just a moment before raising back up.

“Soon.” He simply but firmly stated, pulling his binding cloth above his head and tossing it to the floor, making sure it wouldn’t get in the way.

He then bent down, wrapping his arm around the calves of your legs and pulling them onto the wide bench. He moved his own leg over the opposite side of the bench so that it was now in between him.

“Now,” he looked as you impatiently quivered, trailing his intense stare down your body, “What’s the damage?” You let out an offended huff at his wording, but held your complaints in. You figured any sort of noncompliance would lead you to a one-way trip to the medic.

Shouta really didn’t need to ask, but your fluster enticed him even more. The bottoms of your navy gym uniform had a dark patch stained through them long before the moment he’d entered, by this point it had traveled down your legs.

“Looks like we’re gonna have to find you another pair of those, huh?” He reached forward tracing his hands around the edges of the waistband before pulling the sweats down. You shifted as it tickled your sides. He then tossed them to the floor alongside his equipment.

Your hands reached up to cover your face as his gaze pierced through you. No matter how desperate you were to get some relief, you still couldn’t get past the vulnerability of being sprawled out in front of him like this, let alone, someone actually known for having a deeply intimidating stare.

He tenderly pulled one of your hands away, taking it in his own. This was the first time you’d really noticed how big his were in comparison, cupping around your delicate digits. He closed his eyes, leaving a few tender kisses inside your palm before deeply inhaling the aroma radiating from your wrist. He let it go and looked back, his palms now resting on your thighs, pushing them apart with a surprising amount of ease. You aligned yourself on the bench, propping your back against the wall.

Aizawa bowed over your lower half, leaning into the heat pulsating between your legs. He hadn’t even touched you before your heart began to race, your breath trailing close behind. Your anticipation for him made his heart melt but he couldn’t resist dragging this out for as long as he could. He wanted to make your first heat special for you - memorable - even.

It wasn’t long before Aizawa’s mouth was trailing up the length of your leg. The closer he got, the more unbearably hard it was to not just let his primal instincts take over and ravage your pretty, little entrance with his aching cock. No, Aizawa. He cursed at himself for even thinking that.

Shouta’s tongue danced up your thigh before hitting the edge of your drenched panties. He left soft little nips with his teeth in your thigh, leaving you breathless, before kissing the fabric. He nudged his nose against the surface of it, prodding your sensitive core before letting his tongue fall down its length, intentionally heaving his hot, eager breath against you. You let out a loud gasp that left you clutching your mouth. He smiled once more before taking the edges of the fabric between his fingers and pulling them down, finally revealing your throbbing, leaking pussy.

“Oh, sweetheart…” He sighed into you, sharing a few more kisses before sliding his tongue through those tender, pink folds. You cocked your head back gently scooching your hips towards him, your humiliation suddenly masked by your intense lust for the man.

Aizawa took in all the senses surrounding him. The delightful squeaks you made as he trailed his muscle along your slit, the delicious distinctly omega flavours that drenched his mouth, the way you convulsed and your knees buckled every time he slid his lips or nose against your sensitive, budding clit. He then pulled your legs over his shoulders, giving him more leverage to dive into you.

You reached your hand out as your gasps deepened, he looked up from you inquisitively before reaching his out in return. You laced your fingers between his, yearning for that simple grasp. You held on to it as a form of security, giving soft squeezes to the man every time it was too intense, or a loving stroke of your thumb against his skin when it was just right.

He narrowed his focus back on you, slowly bringing his other hand to your slit. While his tongue massaged your pulsating pearl, he sank two fingers deep inside your entrance. Unsurprisingly your hole was ready and more than willing to accept them. The amount of slick you’d produced was evident enough. You bit down on your lip and let out a whimper as he now began pumping you with his fingers alongside his mouth, your natural lubricant gliding down his hand.

Earlier you’d tried doing the same, attempting to satisfy your intense craving with masturbation alone, but it was never enough. Nothing felt like enough. But Aizawa’s fingers reached parts that you couldn’t, curling and prodding that sensitive area, hiding toward your stomach.

“God..” Your eyes rolled back as you bucked yourself against him, but you still yearned for more. “S...Sensei..” He could see you getting close, your little hand clenching in his own as he rhythmically persisted, your breaths more shaky and sporadic. “Shou..ta..!!” He loved the way his name rolled off your tongue, his cock twitching against his leg from the sound of it. He pulled his hand back and plunged his long fingers even harder and more vigorously, this time including a third. You let out a little shriek while he basically drowned amongst your tiny folds, his fingers driving into you at a steady cadence. He felt as your plush, sensitive walls tightened around his dexterous touch, quivering as you climaxed before him.

You gulped hard trying to let your mind catch up to your body, releasing a steady pant.

“That was great, kitten.” He gave your thigh one last kiss before raising up. “...You did so well.”

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