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samandcolbyownme · 3 months

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Summary: anon request - "Requesting for Jake (and Johnnie but it's not what you think) // Jake Johnnie and y/n go live in the car - Jake accidentally lets it slip that he was with someone - no one knew - y/n and Jake don't want anyone knowing that they're together ??? So they're scrambling to try and cover it up? Idk if that makes any sense but in my mind it does lolllll thanks"

Warnings: Fluff mainly, flirting, trying different candies, Jake and Johnnie being Jake and Johnnie, secret relationship between reader and Jake, cute, funny

Word count: little over 2k | not edited at all

╔═══━━━─── • ───━━━═══╗

As you're getting around to go do a video with Jake and Johnnie, your phone lights up. You lean over, picking up and smiling when you see Jake's name on the screen, "Hello?"

"Are you almost ready? Johnnie's getting a little impatient." Jake laughs and you can hear Johnnie in the background yelling but Jake raises his voice to cover it, "Well be there to get you in like ten minutes."

"Okay." You laugh, "I'm about ready."

"Okay. See you soon." Jake says and you agreed, "Yeah, bye." You smile as you hang up, getting ready to set your phone down, but you get a text that makes you stop.

It's from Jake, Remember, gotta keep your hands to yourself.

You smirk, setting down your brush to hold your phone with both hands, Aw, man. That's no fun. But since we're a secret, I guess I can manage.

You set your phone down, doing your finishing touches to your makeup, before you get another text from Jake, you're my favorite secret.

.·:*¨ ✘ ¨*:·.

"Hey." You say as you get in the car, "Look at you sitting in the back already." You turn to look Johnnie in the backseat and he stares blankly at you, "I don't like it."

Jake sighs making his voice all weird, "Well suck it up buttercup." He laughs as he starts to drive away. You bite your lip, keeping your head forward as you try to keep your smile at bay.

When you're with Jake, you're always giddy, happy to see him. You're always wanting to hold his hand, lay your hand his arm, kiss him.

Anything to be touching him.

But you can't do that right now. You and Jake agreed to try and keep things on the low, just have some private time for as long as you can before word got out and everyone went crazy.

"We got some American candy and some candy from over yonder to compare them to." Jake pulls into the parking lot, leaning forward to check if he's up far enough.

"Over yonder as in.. where, Jake?" Johnnie asks and Jake puts the car in park before turning around to look at him, "Can you not just go with the flow for once? Do you have to know everything?"

Johnnie nods, "Yeah, I'm an anxious person."

"Here." Jake hands him a regular Kit Kat, "Eat this."

"Ooh. Candy!" Johnnie's voice goes high, almost like he's about to pull out the Timmy card and Jake sighs, "Please, Johnnie. Keep Timmy in your pants."

You cover your mouth, fighting back laughter as Jake turns around, looking over at you, "What's so funny?"

You look at him, smirking slightly as you shrug, "You're just a funny guy, Webber." He laughs, "Ah, ha. Ha. I know." He winks at you before starting the stream, "Hello. It's me."

"And me." Johnnie buts in and you lean over, "I'm here, too."

Jake smiles, "You guys get the three stooges today. Moe. Larry. And Curly." His eyes scan over the chat, "Today, I'm going to be making y/n and Johnnie try some candy snacks from over yonder, ya know?"

You watch as he reaches back, pulling a bag from the floor behind your seat.

"Oh!" He yells kinda loud, which makes you jump, "You can get one of these bad girls." He pinches his hoodie and pulls it out, "On the merch site."

He looks back at Johnnie and scoffs, "Stop tongue fucking your Kit Kat and show them your shirt, Jesus Christ Johnnie."

Johnnie tries not to laugh, "B-but. I thought that's what we were doing?"

You roll your eyes, laughing as he leans forward, "If you want to support us in being americas favorite ladies, click the link below."

"Yes, all proceeds will go to Johnnie smelling better than a hairsprayed chicken nugget." Jake claps his hands together, cutting Johnnie off before he can say anything, "Anyway. Let's get started."

He pulls something from the bag and looks at it, "So this is a melon flavored kit from what I'm guessing is Japan? Maybe?" He hands it to you and you look at it, "Cantaloupe I think."

You shrug, opening it up, "I mean.. it smells.. okay?" You hold the open candy up to Jake's nose and he takes a big, over-exaggerated sniff, "Mm." He groans, "Melony."

"You're so fucking weird." Johnnie shakes his head and you extend your arm back, "You wanna smell it, too?"

He leans in, "I don't smell anything."

"Hmm." You pull your arm back up, breaking off one of the bars, "Here." You hand one to Jake and he takes it, "Why thank you." He takes it and bites into it and Johnnie yells, "Thanks for waiting for us you jackass."

You laugh, looking between them and Jake puts the piece he bit off back on top of the bar, "Fine, I'll just magically reattach it."

You lean forward, "Yeah." You nod as you read the chats, "They fight like a married couple."

"We do not." Both Jake and Johnnie say at the same time and you tilt your head, "Really."

"I'm not married to Johnnie because my-" Jake stops and your eyes go slightly wide, "Because your what Jake?"

Johnnie leans up, "Yeah, Jake. Is there something I should know about?"

Jake laughs and shakes his head, biting into the candy, "Fuck you guys."

"Another woman, or man, I should know about?" Johnnie is clearly joking, but he wouldn't be if he knew about the two of you.

"Alright, no. I'm not.." Jake laughs, "I give this one a three point five."

"Way to change the subject." Johnnie says and Jake looks at him, "Can you-"

Johnnie cuts him off, "Not me. The people in the screen are saying it."

You lean forward, eyes scanning down over the chat,

User1- PLEASE they're so funny

User2 - Nahhh that sounded like Jake was about to spill a secret

User3- TELL US

User4 - JAKE WEBBER WHAT ARE YOU HIDING

User5 - he has a secret girlfriend. I'm calling it right now.

User6 - Jake would have told us, so no one jump to conclusions please

User 7 - Y'all don't know that wtffff Jake Jake Jake Jake Jake Jake please

User8 - I just joined, what happened?

"Well, I'll catch you up, Jake and Johnnie are arguing over the fact that they say they aren't a married couple." You laugh as you look at Jake, then to Johnnie, "And you guys so are."

Jake rolls his eyes, "Annyywaaay."

"Anyway." You and Johnnie say at the same time, both mocking Jake. You give Jake a smile, letting him know you're low key flirting with him.

"What the fuck." Johnnie shakes his head, "There's no way that just happened. Fucking mocking me you.. mocker."

Jake rolls his eyes at Johnnie and smirks at you, "Anyway."

.·:*¨ ✘ ¨*:·.

A little while later, towards the end of the stream, you're trying these chocolate candies, "Ah." You catch chocolate in your hand, "Why is it melting like this?”

"I don't know, I can't read Japanese." Jake laughs, "Hang on." He reaches over, grabbing a napkin and wiping it off your pant leg, "Goddamn. We can dress you up but we can't take you out."

"Wait, I thought you only said that to me." Johnnie pouts, "You backstabbing bitch."

Jake laugh, hanging his down as he shakes it, "Johnnie, I can't take you anywhere in general."

"Fair. Fair." Johnnie nods and you try to eat the candy but it gets on your lip and down your chin, "Ope." You close your lip, pointing with your pinky so Jake can get you another napkin.

"Jesus Christ, y/n. You're messier than I am." Johnnie laughs and you roll your eyes. Jake wipes your chin and lip with his thumb and pops it into his mouth, without thinking of course.

"Did you just.. Jake. You're holding a fucking napkin." Johnnie points and Jake just stares at you, panicking on what to do.

You lick your lips, wiping your chin off with the napkin, "now that I can speak, Johnnie. At least I don't leave black hair color stains on Jake's white seats."

Johnnie purses his lips and points to you, "That.. is from my root cover up bullshit. It's not easy being a blonde who dyes their hair, ya know."

Jake leans back over into his seat and laugh, "That's why you're stupid, stupid fuck."

You and Jake gently, well you gently bully Johnnie. Jake just bullies him to try and cover up what he did to you, but the chat won't let it go.

User9 - DID HE JUST- he didn't

User10- PLEASE HE HAD A NAPKIN

User11 - if I was y/n right now I'd be dead

User12 - that was so hot WTF

User13 - PLEASS GELL MW THEURE DAYING

User14 - JAKE blink if you like y/n

User15 - Johnnie absolutely kills me he's so funny without even trying LMAO

User16 - Johnnie knows. Johnnie tell us. Please Johnnie. Please SPILL IT

"Wait." Johnnie leans forward, "What did I spill?" He looks around and Jake laughs, "You idiot, they're telling you to spill something, you know like a secret. Fuck, why are we friends?"

"Because.." Johnnie changes his voice, "You love me. I'm all you have."

"Not true." Jake mumbles as he glances over at you because raising his voice loud enough for Johnnie to hear, "Yeah, yeah. I guess. Whatever you say."

"I'll take it." Johnnie nods and leans back, "so is that all or is there any other things we need to try?"

"Yeah, you need to try shutting the fuck up for once." Jake tries not to laugh, but fails, snorting as he rests his head on the steering wheel, "Fucking hell, Johnnie."

"As I said. Married couple." You laugh as you break apart another Kit Kat and hand a piece to Jake.

Johnnie slowly leans forward, his voice is quiet, "You'll have to kill me if you want me to stop, because I'm never going to stop."

Jake waits a few seconds and quickly reaches his hands up, trying to get Johnnie's neck.

User17 - we're about to witness the murder of Johnnie Guilbert

User18 - rip Johnnie

User19 - idk how y/n puts up with them

You sigh, shrugging as you tilt your head, "I don't know either, honestly." You laugh, reaching up to break up the small cat fight between the boys, "Hey, no blood on the white interior."

"Yes mom." Jake faces forward, hands in his lap and Johnnie salutes you, "Yes ma'am."

You chew on the inside of your cheek, "Do we have anything else to try?" Jake shakes his head, "No, I don't think we do." He looks over at you, "I am hungry though."

You and Johnnie both agree and Johnnie sighs, "Stop. Fucking. Copying me."

"Stop fucking copying me." You mock him with a laugh and Johnnie hangs his head down, "You're lucky you're not Jake saying that because if it was Jake I-"

"What." Jake spins around, "What will you do, you big bad. Emo goth guy?" He tries not to laugh again and Johnnie just reaches up slowly, tapping him on the cheek, "That. Thats what I'd do."

"You hit like a bitch bro, remind me to never have you on my side in a fight." Jake turns around laughing and Johnnie just sighs, "I can't stand you."

"You love me." Jake smiles at him and Johnnie tries not to laugh, "Fuck off."

"You know.. I'd- nevermind." Jake laughs, shaking his head, "Nevermind. Okay. So that's it for today. See you in the next one, bye."

Johnnie waves, along with you and Jake ends the stream.

It's quiet for a few minutes as everyone gets situated for the drive to get food and Johnnie breaks the silence, "so are you guys like fucking? Or what?"

You and Jake glance at each other, neither one of you willing to answer and Johnnie huffs, “Mm. Just as I suspected.”

.·:*¨ ✘ ¨*:·.

This was literally written on a whim. I had this sitting in my drafts for a little while and I finally just sat down and kept writing until I felt like it was good enough to stop.

I hope you enjoyed, let me know what you think.

Love you all! 🖤

Likes and reblogs are majorly appreciated!

#samandcolby-ownme #jake webber one shots #jake webber one shot #jake webber fluff #jake webber x reader #jake webber #fluff #comedy one shot #funny one shot #fluff one shots #one shot fluff #One shot fluff Jake Webber #as I suspected #johnnie and jake #jake and johnnie #Johnnie Guilbert #Jake and Johnnie one shot

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ghost-bxrd · 5 months

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Stony silence rings from the other end of the line, but Jason knows Bruce is listening. Listening and running through several possibilities of how someone could have gotten this number while simultaneously tracking the call signal.

This is gonna be fucking gold.

Time to sell it.

“Dad,” he sobs, pitching his voice until it breaks, teeth chattering exaggeratedly, “Dad, please, I’m scared, I-“ Jason cuts himself off with a scream and another series of sobs, “Please, I can’t— it’s locked! Please, no, Dad, it’s locked—“

A sharp intake of breath, the dull thump of something heavy colliding unexpectedly.

“Dad!” Jason cries, calling upon every single drama class he’s ever had, “Please… please- it’s almost to zero- please, I’m sorry, please, please, it hurts so much-“

Bruce breaks.

“Jason, Jason, hold on Jaylad, hold on, I will find-“

Jason smashes the phone against the marble dress of the creepy angel standing guard over his grave. The pieces vanish into the wet grass, like an occult offering eaten by Gotham’s soil.

Then Jason turns and walks away with a gleeful little smile.

But not without flipping the stupid angel off one last time.

— Grave Pretender sneak peek

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cryptidsm00cher · 8 months

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IM\ LITERALY CANT STOP CRACKING G UP AT ELFOS DEAD BODYD IN THE WATER I CANT LOOK AT THIS PICTURE FOR LONGER THAN A SECOND WDIHFITHOUT CRYINGG

#comedy #elfo disenchantment #bean disenchantment #disenchantment season 5 #disenchantment #luci disenchantment #mora the mermaid #bean x mora #every friend group has #WHOEVER DREW THAT SHOT #i love you #……..#also the mora one is based off thst one post but i can’t find it

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catgirljaneway · 7 months

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Year of Hell Family Dinner

Voy Textposts 5

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matthyeu · 6 months

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tim hortons ― smt.

pairing ⇢ seok matthew x gn!reader

genre ⇢ comedy, fluff

warnings ⇢ this was just self-indulgence as you will see </3, mentions of a car crash but nothing happened lol

word count ⇢ 1377

synopsis ⇢ this is how matthew's life would be if he didn't get 3rd place on boy's planet. hey, at least he met you.

notes ⇢ HEYYY GUESS WHOS BACK,,, well not really i’m just like popping back in after the comeback bc like WOWWW but hi i’ve been really stressed back in school doing a lot of exams and applications for nursing school. i just finished my teas and like the semester’s almost over so i’m so STRESSED AAAAAA and this has been in my drafts for so long bc yk i’m just manifesting myself getting into nursing school but i will def try to get more uploaded soon but i’m always tired from work and school eueueu got some drafts tho so i’m hoping to get that done soon. take care!!

perhaps it wasn’t the best idea to get an early start to studying for your pharmacology exam. not, it definitely wasn’t the best idea. every professor had always told you to review and study more than you thought you needed, so you tried your best to do just that. it was just that one confused topic led to another…and then to another until you realized it was nearing two.

late nights were no stranger for a nursing student, but they were not recommended if you had plans for the morning after, especially if the morning after was your weekly 12-hour long clinical rotation.

that was how you ended up with two and a half hours of sleep, a frantically thrown together lunch, missing materials, and a need for caffeine after you overslept your alarm by twenty minutes. you cursed your ability to sleep through alarms but also thanked yourself for setting alarms every five minutes in case this ever happened.

the facility you were stationed at was a little over an hour from your apartment, so you would barely make it in time. there was realistically no time for you to stop by for coffee. usually, you would just make your own, but your unfortunate luck continued to prosper as you had forgotten to purchase more instant coffee in your last grocery run. however, seeing as how you nearly fell asleep behind the wheel the first ten minutes of your drive, you knew you needed it. if you died in a car crash, there was definitely no chance for you to make it to your clinical on time.

you pulled into the parking lot at the tim hortons nearest to your apartment, seeing only one other car there who you assumed belonged to whatever employee was on opening duty. it was only 4:43. this location opened at 5. if you waited for it to open, you would definitely be late. even if you had just told yourself it was alright to be late, you were sure your instructor would not be pleased if you were, especially since this was an obstacle you could potentially get over.

reluctantly, you shuffled your feet to the entrance, not worrying if you would wear the soles of your white shoes quicker than they were supposed to last. you didn’t want to bother the poor worker, but it was your only choice besides sitting in your car waiting for 17 minutes, which was definitely not practical.

reaching the entrance, you peered in to see a young man diligently preparing for the day. you figured he would be far too busy to notice you (or it was just your excuse to walk back to your car and wait). still, mustered up the courage to wave at him from outside, refraining from knocking on the glass.

by some dumb luck, he noticed you and came to the door from around the counter. he gave an apologetic smile as he opened the door, popping his head out. “sorry, we aren’t open yet.”

“actually, i was wondering if you could make an exception. i have to be at the hospital in an hour and it’s an hour drive from here,” you explained as you fidgeted with your watch.

“oh definitely i can do that for you. that hospital must need you as soon as you can get there,” he commented as he opened the door wider for you to come in.

“oh no, they do not need me. yesterday i put on my sterile gloves wrong 4 times because of nervousness. if anything, they hope i’m not there,” you casually blurted out, which caused the employee to give you a concerned look. “i’m a nursing student, not a licensed healthcare provider. everyone always thinks of nurse or doctor when they see someone in scrubs, but i’m just a stressed person in college trying to get through.”

“ah, makes sense. i thought you looked young to be finished with school already, but i didn’t want to say anything in case it was offensive,” he commented once you both were at the register, “what can i get for you?”

“just a medium iced latte please,” you ordered as you dug through your wallet for the right card.

“go ahead and insert your card whenever you’re ready.”

and you did just that, receiving the receipt from the employee once the transaction was over. “it will be out shortly.”

there wasn’t much for you to do but stand off to the side as you watched him work. as time went by, there was something familiar about him you couldn’t catch. it was as if you had seen him from somewhere, but the only places you really frequented were the library and hospitals. was it from tv?

“here you go,” he announced as he slid the cup over the counter.

as he was about to head back to finishing his preparations, you took a sip of your latte. with the newfound courage taken over you by the caffeine, your thoughts spilled out of your mouth. “do i know you from somewhere?”

he chucked. “no, i don’t think you have. if so, it was a long time ago since i just got back to canada.”

“you have a celebrity lookalike or something? i swear i’ve seen your face somewhere before,” you asked.

“ever heard of boys planet?”

then it hit you. you looked at his nametag. matthew. of course, he was the canadian from that korean reality show one of your friends had shown you. in fact, she begged for you to help her vote, and she was devastated when her one-pick didn’t make the group. and here he was, standing in front of you at tim hortons.

“ohhh that makes a lot of sense. my friend had me voting every day for you when the show was airing. interesting seeing you working here. totally thought you’d continue trying to be an idol if you didn’t make the lineup.”

“i missed home too much, i guess. i had it planned out during the finale too, the part time job i’d get if i didn’t make it. didn’t think i’d actually end up at timmies, but alas, things happen. thanks for your support though.”

“don’t thank me,” you insisted, “i’m just an unsuspecting victim to desperate fans who wanted the best for their faves.”

“i think that’s the best feeling though, meeting someone who doesn’t really care about what you’ve done or who you are. you’re the first person who’s actually recognized me, and i’m glad it’s not someone who would leak this information. though, i’m sure it will spread eventually.”

you finally noticed what he was doing throughout the conversation: packaging a 10-count box of timbits. “here,” he called as he pushed yet another item over the counter, “on the house.”

shaking your head, you quickly responded, “no i can’t.”

“trust me, you’re going to need the boost of energy from the sugar for your shift. just take it, or else you’ll be late.”

“oh shit,” you cursed, realizing you had spent too much time in the shop already, “fine, but i’ll be back and next time, i’m going to buy something for you to enjoy.”

“mhm good luck!”

you ran back to your car, relieved you decided to come in when you did when you saw a plethora of cars pulling in with two minutes until opening. the coffee was placed into the cupholder and the box onto your passenger seat.

before beginning your long drive to your impending doom, you decided to have one of the timbits matthew had given you. that was when you noticed the small message written on the top of the box.

good luck! you’re doing great things for the world :) come back anytime! i always open on fridays and will take you after 4:30.

you smiled at the little note, popping one of the pieces into your mouth. it tasted way better than timbit you had ever had. you weren’t sure if that was just because they were fresh in the morning or the care you knew was packed into them. needless to say, you would wake up a little earlier on your fridays to go back to this location to see matthew.

#🐨 ― matthyeu #zerobaseone #zb1 #zb1 x reader #zerobaseone x reader #zerobaseone imagines #zb1 scenarios #zb1 drabbles #seok matthew #zb1 matthew #seok matthew x reader #zb1 matthew x reader #seok matthew imagines #seok matthew one-shot #comedy #fluff

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snowmist-hashira · 11 months

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Probably a weird ass scenario but imagine while the reader was fighting demons with muichiro, the reader has an impulsive thought on biting a demons arm, for some odd reason curious on what they taste like... their stomach did not take it too well however.

Sorry if this request seems weird, I literally just thought of 'What do demons taste like"?

[Chapter title: Absurdities]

[Requested] Muichiro Tokitou x Reader

Wattpad:[KNY Fanfiction] (One shots) Tokito Muichiro x Reader

Archive:Kimetsu No Yaiba: Tokitou Muichiro x Reader

Master list:♠ Information ♠

Word count: 819

I am open to requests for Muichiro x Reader content, and I also enjoy engaging in roleplays. If you're interested in either, please feel free to check out my pinned post for more information. ~ ♠

I can't, I'm dying out of laughter HAHAHA. This scene might deviate slightly from Muichiro's usual character, It was intended to add a comedic and parody element to the story, and hopefully it brought some laughter to you as well XD

Muichiro and Y/n were assigned to a joint mission aimed at unraveling the enigma surrounding the sudden disappearance of young individuals during the darkest hours of the night. Their objective was to investigate whether demons were responsible for these incidents and, if confirmed, eliminate the demonic threat.

As night descended upon them, they ventured into the eerie, desolate town, their senses heightened as they searched for any clues regarding the disappearances. The moon cast an ominous glow over the empty streets, adding to the air of unease that hung in the atmosphere.

The once vibrant and bustling town had transformed into a ghostly shell of its former self. Closed shutters and boarded-up windows hinted at the fear that had gripped the townsfolk, forcing them into seclusion.

The silence was broken only by the distant hooting of an owl and the soft rustling of leaves in the wind.

Suddenly, a faint whisper reached their ears. Muichiro and Y/n turned their heads simultaneously, trying to discern its source. The whisper seemed to be a mixture of fear and despair, as if carried on a haunting breeze.

As a demon emerged from the shadows, it launched an attack towards the two, but Muichiro and Y/n skillfully evaded its slashing claws. However, Y/n was caught off guard when the demon suddenly split into two. One of them swiftly moved towards her, forcefully covering her mouth with its hand.

She wondered what demons tasted like and her impulsive curiosity got the better of her. In a moment that could only be described as comically bizarre, she shifted her head, releasing the demon's grasp slightly, and took a daring bite at the hand covering her mouth.

Her impulsive and rather peculiar act of biting the demon's hand out of curiosity left everyone stunned. Both the demons and Muichiro stood there, frozen and utterly bewildered by what had just transpired.

Muichiro's hand remained poised at the hilt of his blade, forgotten in the face of the absurdity that had unfolded before him.

The demon whose hand Y/n had bitten pulled back in pain, staring at Y/n in a mixture of shock and confusion. It seemed utterly dumbfounded, as if struggling to process what had just happened. The other demon, witnessing the bizarre turn of events, couldn't help but raise an eyebrow—or at least its closest demonic equivalent to an eyebrow.

"Wait, did you just… bite the demon?" Muichiro finally managed to utter, his voice tinged with disbelief.

Y/n, realizing the absurdity of the situation, quickly snapped out of her momentary lapse in judgment. She spat out the demon's hand, wiping her mouth with a mix of confusion and embarrassment.

"Uh… Yeah, I guess curiosity got the best of me," Y/n sheepishly replied, trying to regain her composure.

The demons, still stunned and seemingly unsure of how to react, exchanged perplexed glances. Their menacing presence was momentarily shattered by this unexpected and comedic interlude.

Muichiro's sweat drop intensified, and he couldn't help but feel a mixture of concern and amusement for his partner. Resuming his battle stance, he swiftly moved with lightning-fast speed, beheading both demons without a moment's hesitation.

As their lifeless bodies fell to the ground, their expressions of confusion remained etched on their faces, invoking a sense of sympathy from Muichiro.

"Y/n…" Muichiro glanced at her with a mix of worry and disbelief, questioning her sanity. "Are you sure you're alright? Biting demons out of curiosity is… well, not exactly what we do..."

Y/n, a sheepish grin spreading across their face, scratched the back of their head. "Sorry, Muichiro. I guess my curiosity got the better of me. But hey, in the face of danger, why not take a bite, right?"

Muichiro blinked, momentarily speechless. "What…?” Y/n's explanation left him utterly dumbfounded, his eyes widening in disbelief. He couldn't help but question the sanity of his partner as he tried to process the absurdity of the situation.

"What… in the name of all…" Muichiro stammered, his voice tinged with a mixture of concern and disbelief. "Taking a bite out of demons??”

Y/n shrugged nonchalantly, their sheepish grin never leaving her face. "Well, Muichiro, life is too short to let opportunities pass by. Who knows, maybe demons taste like a mix of cotton candy and rainbows. A demon's hand could be the new delicacy we've been missing out on!"

“…” Muichiro stared at Y/n with a mix of disbelief and incredulity, his mouth slightly agape. He sighed heavily and massaged his temples, as if trying to alleviate the headache induced by the sheer absurdity of the situation.

"Y/n, I never thought I'd find myself in a conversation about the culinary potential of demons' appendages," Muichiro deadpanned, his voice laced with concern. He shook his head, sighing dramatically as he came to a realization.

"Y/n, Perhaps, it's time we schedule a visit to the nearest medical professional. Just to be on the safe side."

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karizard-ao3 · 5 months

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Crack by me, art by @lauri-haro. It's Eremika week 2023 and Armin has his hands full when Eren shows up at the police station with a new, law-breaking gf. Enjoy!

#eremika week #Eremika #attack on titan fanfic #fanfiction #diamonds are this boy's worst friend #fanfic #comedy #one shot #eren and mikasa #armin arlert #save armin #eren jaeger #mikasa ackerman

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ughhhdavid · 11 months

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it's giving

#ted lasso #trent crimm #season 2 #episode 7 #2x07 #headspace #tedtrent #tedependent #ted x trent #friends #episode 10 #the one with russ #2x10 #my post #comparing specific ted lasso shots with specific shots in other comedy shows is like my thing i guess #rachel green

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impala-dreamer · 6 months

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Another War

A Story From The MCU (Falcon and The Winter Soldier)

~Sam and Bucky are continuously bickering... even in the bedroom.~

Sam Wilson, Bucky Barnes, F!Reader

1,732 Words

Warnings: NSFW. Comedy and Smuts.

A/N: I didn't "pair them up" for a reason, but there's no Sam/Bucky action... don't worry. You'll see...

Impala-Dreamer’s Masterlist ~ Patreon ~ Published Works

It wasn’t an uncommon thing to bear witness to- the bickering. Sam and Bucky were constantly at each other’s throats arguing about just about everything. Not a moment would pass where one man wasn’t side-eyeing the other and or dramatically huffing. It was generally amusing, but at that moment, it was incredibly frustrating.

They stood, naked and quarreling at the foot of the bed, repeatedly gesturing towards you even as they paid you no regard.

With ankles and wrists tied to the bed with silken ropes, a white sash wrapped around your head and locked between your lips, you were at their mercy. Naked and whimpering, you had no choice but to wait and see what their plan was.

“All I’m sayin’ is that we can’t both be down there at the same time.”

Bucky scoffed at Sam’s words. “You kidding me? Of course we can. She has two holes.”

Sam pursed his lips. “I ain’t gonna be in a position where my dick touches your dick. Even by accident, even a little bit. Therefore, double time is out.”

The thought of both of them down south at once made you shiver and leak. You could feel a stream of wetness slick down your crack and into the sheets. It probably wasn’t possible to take both of them at once- your ass was untrained, your cunt too tight, but the idea was lovely. Eyes gliding down their firm bodies, you gazed at their cocks, only half hard but long and thick. Imagining them both at once, practically splitting you open was enough to make you moan.

Bucky shot a look at you and his lips curled in a tiny smirk. “Be right with you, doll,” he assured, adding a wink for good measure.

Arousal burned in your belly and you jerked your hips. Blue eyes widened slightly and Bucky licked his lips.

“She’s waiting,” he said, turning back to Sam.

“Yeah, well, so am I.” Sam rubbed a hand down his face and scratched at his jaw. “You know what? Screw this. I’m going in.”

Grabbing his cock, Sam turned to the bed and only managed to get one knee on the mattress before he was stopped by a metal grip that nearly knocked him back into the far wall.

“Not so fast!” Bucky warned, eyes narrowed and silver digits tensing on Sam’s upper arm. “We’re not finished here.”

Sam rolled his eyes and huffed. “And we never will be if you don’t step off and let me get in there.”

It was hard not to laugh at their ridiculous argument, but harder still not to whine with desperation. You gnawed at the sash in your mouth and pushed it with your tongue in a pathetic attempt to loosen it and speak.

Sam had tied it well.

Bucky growled and released his hold on Sam.

“Who put you in charge of positions anyway?”

Dark eyes stared on with annoyance. “I did. You can’t make a damned decision to save your life.”

Bucky balked. “Fuck you, I can decide things. I’ve been deciding things since before your grandfather was born!”

“Here we go again, the old man talk.” Sam tossed his hands up and sighed. “You always gotta bring up that shit like it matters.”

“It does matter.” Bucky took a step towards the bed, essentially blocking Sam from getting to you. “Now, respect your elders and back up. That pussy is mine.”

Every muscle in your body clenched and your sensitive flesh darkened with heightened arousal.

Sam skirted around him and set his knee on the bed once more. “Don’t think so, Grandpa. She wants a young, virile man, not some Baby Boomer.”

“Virile?”

“You heard me.”

Bucky sneered and pushed Sam back again. “And excuse me, I’m no Baby Boomer. We were called the Greatest Generation for a reason.”

Sam chuckled. “Were. As in past tense.” Fearlessly, he grabbed Bucky’s metal arm and shoved him back away from the bed. “Make room for the future.”

More than annoyed, Bucky whipped his arm away and sucked his teeth, his jaw clenching. “I’m gonna kick your ass later, just be prepared.”

“Yeah, yeah…” Sam set his eyes on your cunt and puckered his wet lips, honing in on his target. “You can try.”

“I will.”

“Sure.”

“I hate you so much.”

“Feeling’s mutual.”

Almost at the end of your patience, you tried to break up the fight, but your words came on in an unintelligible mumble. You strained against the ropes, twisted your hips, groaned as loud as you could.

The men got your point and relented. They both took a deep breath and stood back up, turning once more towards each other to end the debate and get over their bickering.

A wave of relief washed over you and you set your eyes upon their cocks once more. Your mouth watered around the sash and drool spilled down your chin. You needed them badly, no matter who went where.

Sam spoke first, his arms crossed over his smooth, puffed out chest, taking charge again. “How about we spit roast her? Will that make you happy?”

Confused, Bucky squinted down at him. “What?”

“Spit roast,” he repeated.

Bucky laughed. “That’s not a thing, you made that up.”

Sam exhaled hard through his nose. “That absolutely is a thing.”

“No it’s not. You’re just fucking with me.”

“While I do enjoy fucking with you, this time I’m not. It’s a thing.”

Bucky hummed and looked over at you, trying to imagine what Sam was talking about.

“It’s when we go at her from both ends,” Sam explained calmly. “Like… putting a chicken on a spit and… well, roasting it.”

“So… I go-” Bucky gestured to your pussy, then your face. “And you go-”

“Yeah. Technically. Except I’m going there-” Sam pointed at your cunt. “And you go up there.”

Bucky shook his head. “Why do you get to go there? Why can’t I go there?”

“Because someone’s gotta go there and the other has to go up there or the whole thing doesn’t work!”

Sensing the utter decline of your evening, you yelled again and thrashed about until they stopped and stared at you.

Bucky cocked a brow. “Why don’t we just ask Y/N what she wants?”

It was as if the idea had occurred to neither of them, and Sam made a little noise of interest.

“Huh. Good idea.”

Back on the mattress, he crawled up to the headboard and gently pulled the sash from your mouth. Finally free, you smacked your dry lips together and swallowed.

“Thank you!” Flipping your head to glare at them both in turn, you let them have it. “You two are the dumbest fuckers I’ve ever met. You’re literally fighting over the stupidest thing right now. Who goes where, who does what… You’re both gonna get some so who cares! And, you’ve both already been both places so you know they’re both good- so shut the fuck up and somebody fuck me before I dry up faster than Arizona in a drought!”

At your feet, Bucky struggled not to laugh, but Sam let it go, nearly bursting out at your frustration.

“Oh my god! Now you’re laughing at me?”

Sam covered his mouth, unable to stop. “I’m sorry. I’m sorry. I can’t.”

Watching Sam lose it, Bucky broke as well. He turned his back but you could see his shoulders shaking with each laugh.

“You two suck,” you sighed. “So much.”

Sam softened and leaned close, his breath wisping over your collarbone. “Oh, don’t be like that. You know you love it.”

Your pulse quickened. “Nope. I hate you both.”

Bucky looked over his shoulder at you; blue eyes bright and mesmerizing. “Come on, sweetheart. No need to lie.”

The shiver was back and you squirmed, rolling your hips as Bucky flipped over onto his hands and knees. He was like a tiger and your lips were his prey.

With your eyes locked on Bucky, Sam snuck his hand down your side and scraped his blunt nails across your lower belly.

“Oh god…”

Bucky reached his goal and dropped down to lick deep into your mouth, spreading your lips with his forceful kiss. You moaned into his mouth, felt your eyes close tight as the heat spread quickly through your system.

When Sam’s fingers dipped between your open legs, you choked back a scream as the flood returned. He gathered up the slick and coated your clit with it before turning mind numbing circles right above it.

“Not dry now,” he teased.

Bucky pulled back and stared down into the very center of you. “She never is…”

Sam sat up a bit. “Well, sometimes she is. She don’t walk around soaking her panties all day.”

“She does when I’m around.”

“You know what- I’m gonna smack the hell out of you if you-”

“Enough!”

Your roar shut them both up and they looked down in awe and apology.

“I swear to god, this is the last time I let you two into my bed at the same time. I can’t take it anymore.” A deep breath calmed you slightly, but it was just too much. “Now, untie me and let’s get this thing over with. Bucky, you’re up here, Sam, you go downtown. OK? Good. Let’s go.”

In agreement and in tandem, they both set to releasing you from the ropes. Bucky gently untied your ankles while Sam leaned over you to let your arms free.

“See? Told you she wanted me down there,” Sam whispered under his breath while scooting down to the foot of the bed.

Bucky leered and shook his head. “You’re such an ass.”

Sam sat straight up and raised a finger, ready to lash out at Bucky again, reup the argument.

Before they could get back at it, you jumped up and slapped them both in the side of the head.

“Hey!”

Sam gulped audibly and Bucky rubbed at his head.

“Ouch.”

“That didn’t hurt,” Sam huffed.

Bucky gawked. “Yes it did!”

“No it didn’t, you pussy.”

“Who you calling a pussy, you fat head?”

“Fat head? The fuck does that even mean?”

On and on they went, not even noticing that you slipped away into the other room to take care of yourself on the sofa.

It wasn’t an uncommon thing to witness them fighting, but it certainly was frustrating.

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#mcu fanfiction #fatws #bucky x reader #sam wilson x reader #comedy #one shot

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bedlamsbard · 6 months

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my next fic probably isn't going to be the Yonderverse "Loki organizes Steve's and Bruce's dual stag party and it goes, uh, well, Things Happen" but it COULD be.

peak comedy: Steve, Bucky, Loki, Thor, Clint, Rocket, Sam, Rhodey, Scott, and Bruce getting into Trouble In Space while Steve and Bruce just want to go home and make out with their respective brides-to-be. (Tony was invited but opted out, saying he had had enough of space and someone had to hold down the fort on Earth.)

#this is where that clint ficbit with the pied raven would go #nat's and betty's hen do is either equal amounts of trouble or all the girls are just doing shots in a bar in norway like normal people #or possibly both #adventures in accountability #roleswap endgame au concept #I don't do pure comedy well so it's unlikely but it's one of several ruminating fic bunnies

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samandcolbyownme · 4 months

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Summary: Sam and reader's relationship is fairly new. They've been keeping it a secret from everyone, even Colby. But, it soon gets unveiled to him by some tricksters that spook Sam and reader during their investigation.

Warnings: some SMUT18+, strong language, scary and creepy things done to reader by ghosts such as touching and being spoken to, oral (f), fingering, hair pulling, comedic fluff with a slight dash of smut

Word count: 6.5k | not edited

Disclaimer: I made everything up for this story, straight off the top of my head. Enjoy!

"What's up guys." Colby says loudly with a smile, "It's Sam and Colby. But you already knew that." He laughs and you shake your head.

"Today, we have a very special guest. You probably have seen her in a few of our other videos." Sam holds his hand out towards you, "Y/n."

"Hey guys!" You wave, "I'm very. Very excited for this one today and I'll let the guys explain why."

Sam gives you a smile and looks back at the camera, "Today we're investigating the Seebold Manor." Sam looks at Colby.

"The Seebold Manor is like no other place we've explored because today, we won't just be dealing with normal ghosts and or demons.."

"We are going to be.. drum roll please." Sam starts to pat his knees, you and Colby following along, "What we were told are trickster spirits."

"Y/n. Why don't you tell them what that means." Colby motions and Sam watches you as you take a deep breath, "So. We will be dealing with trickster spirits, as Sam said. These spirits are basically what their name says. They like to play tricks, basically moving stuff around. Tapping your shoulder, generally non-harmful stuff."

"I was told by the owner, that one person- or.." Sam looks at Colby and holds up two fingers, "Was it two people that were tripped on the steps?"

Colby presses his fingers to his chin and thinks for a moment, "I think Brian said two."

You glance over at Sam as he continues talking, and all you can think about is how no one knows that you're dating, and how good Sam looks.

"Y/n."

You blink, breaking your stare from Sam and quickly cover it up, "I saw something standing over there."

Sam smirks slightly, covering his lips with his hand to hide it, knowing that you were definitely looking at him, "Where?"

You point, "Over by that one cement pillar thingy."

"Oh shit." Colby shakes his head, "They're probably thinking, this group of nimwits will be easy to mess with."

You all laugh and you nod, "You know, I was honestly thinking that, too." Sam looks at you, "I third that. We're in for it tonight."

"We are going to go ahead and get set up.." Sam points to the camera, "See you guys in a minute."

As you make your way towards the house, Sam's hand gently brushes against yours and you smile at him. You head snaps towards Colby as he turns around and you cross your arms.

You wanted to tell Colby, you really did. But you like the idea of sneaking around right now. The adrenaline from possibly getting caught.

You and Sam both knew that Colby would only be mad because you didn't tell him right away, and you were fine with that.

This is something that only you and Sam knew about, and you wanted to milk it just a little while longer.

"Alright. What shall we do first?" Colby claps his hands together, "I definitely think we should just kind of sit stuff out, see if we can catch it being moved?"

"That's a really good idea. I brought a third camera, just in case we'd need it. We can set it up in the living room area to watch our other thing." Sam looks around, clicking the camera on, "Did you hear that?"

"Hear what?" You and Colby say in unison, looking to where Sam is looking.

It's quiet for a second before you speak up, "What did you hear?"

"Like a rubber dodge ball being bounced. Like the echo of it, you know what I mean?" Sam whispers as he looks to you and Colby. He snaps his head back, "There it was again."

You shake your head, "I didn't hear any of that. Did you?" You point to Colby and he shakes his head, "I didn't hear that, but when we were walking down the steps it felt like someone walked past me, you know that feeling?"

You and Sam nod, "I thought someone else was with us, like there was five when we came back down stairs." Sam motions behind him, "Like they were following close.”

You shake, "oh, I just got goosebumps."

Sam gives you a sympathetic look, wanting to comfort you but not wanting to give it away just yet, "I had them the second we walked in, actually."

"Alright. I'll go get the other camera so we can set that up first." Colby points to the door, "Do you guys have anything on you that you could set out in the meantime?"

You take your backpack off your shoulders and unzip it, "I have my water bottle and for some reason, an extra pair of socks."

They laugh and Sam turns the camera off before he takes off his backpack, "I have a water bottle too, and I have a few of our stickers we could set out."

Colby nods, "I'll grab something from the car. I'll be right back." As soon as he leaves, Sam pulls you in by the waist, "We should just tell him. I can't stand playing this, we're only friends game.."

You sigh, laying your hands on his chest, "I know. It's hard keeping my friendly distance from you."

Sam presses his lips to your forehead, "At any time you get scared you can come to me." Sam looks down at you and you nod, "I know. I will.. but.." you bite your lip, smirking, "I had an idea."

"Uh oh." He smirks and tilts his head, "Let's hear it."

"While we were doing the tour.." you glance to the door, making sure Colby didn't come back yet, "I've kept a mental note about rooms."

"Rooms?" Sam raises a brow, "Tell me more."

"If we.. ya know.. split up.. we could meet up in one of the said rooms.." you smirk, "Do I need to keep going?"

Sam shakes his head, cupping your cheeks, "You're an adventurous little devil aren't you?"

You shrug, "Figured it could add to the exhilaration."

"I don't have any doubts about that." Sam gives you a quick kiss and steps away as the door opens and Colby walks through, "So I grabbed one of my extra sweatshirts, I figured we could fold it a certain way. See if it gets moved or something?" Colby walks over, "it's the only thing I could find."

"That should work. I'm sure they'll move stuff that's already here too. So we just need to make a mental note-" you stop and look down the hall, "Clapping. Like a quick-" you clap your hands together and look at them.

Sam turns the camera on again, "Y/n just said she heard clapping.. I didn't.. did you?" He points the camera to Colby and he tilts his head, "I thought I hea-" Colby gasps, eyes going wide as he points, "That."

You nod, "Exactly that."

Sam points the camera down the hallway, "y/n. Clap twice."

You clap your hands together, twice like Sam asked. You wait a few moments and the clapping sound happens back.

"No fucking way." Sam shakes his head.

"Holy fuck." Colby pokes your arm, "Do it three times this time."

You take a deep breath, clapping your hands three times slowly, and sure enough, three claps come back, "Oh my god." You shiver, "That is fucking wild."

"Let's do the REM pod. We can set it at the entrance of the living room." Sam sighs, "this is going to be good."

He cuts the camera and you walk down the hall, jumping as you hear a loud clap almost next to your head, "Fuck." You laugh, "Someone clapped again.. but it was like right next to my head this time."

"Yeah I definitely heard that one." Colby takes the pod and turns it on, setting it down on the ground, "Okay." He looks at the camera once Sam gets it rolling, "someone clapped right next to y/n's head as we were walking down here. So that means something is here."

You all back away from the pod and Sam hand the camera to Colby before speaking, "So as you all know, and if you don't, this is what is called a REM pod. It lights up red when something gets close to it, just like this." He walks up, lifting his shoe to get it to light up red, "Has to be pretty close for it to light up so.."

Sam clears his throat, "My name is Sam, this is Colby and y/n. We're here to do an investigation, get to know this place a little bit better. We mean absolutely no harm to you or anyone else that might be here."

"We heard you clapping for us, so if you're here with us right now, can you make that little red light flash just like my friend Sam did?" Colby asks and keeps the camera on the pod, waiting for it to flash.

And it does.

"Great. Thank you." Colby blows air, "If this is one of the members from the Seebold family, can you make it light up again?"

After a few moments of glancing at each other and waiting, it lights up red.

As you're standing there, listening to them ask more questions, something brushes your leg and you jump, "Shit." You look around, "Something brushed or rubbed up against my leg."

Colby turns the flash on the camera, moving it around, "There's nothing here. Where was it at?"

You point to your calf, "It honestly felt like a cat, you know when they rub up against your leg."

"Maybe they had a cat?" Sam suggests, "I don't know if they had any animals or not but I'm sure it's possible."

You shrug and the pod lights up, "Can you make that light up again if you had a cat."

Instant red.

"Well. I guess they had a cat." You laugh and sigh, "That was so weird."

"There's that sound again." Sam turns, "The rubber ball bouncing." He holds his hand out to keep you and Colby from talking, "Can you do that again so my fri-"

You raise your eyebrows, "I hear it."

Colby nods, "Yeah. I hear that, too. That's fucking.." he laughs, "Oh shit."

"Thank you." Sam looks at you and Colby with a nervous smile, "So they like to let us know they're here."

The pod lights up red and you laugh, "We appreciate you being so active with us." It lights up again and you look at Sam and Colby, "They must like us or something."

"Alright, so should we let that here with the camera on and go to the other rooms?" Sam glances at you and you look down to hide your smile.

Colby nods, "We can set out stuff out all over. Put the camera up right there on that table." Colby walks over to a table and sets the extra camera down, "Does this work?"

"Yeah, that's perfect, yes." Sam starts setting stuff out and you fold Colby's sweatshirt in a specific way.

Hood tucked under and the sleeves in the hoodie pocket. You tie the strings into a bow, "That look specific enough?"

Colby walks over and chuckles, "that's better than what I was going to do."

You laugh, "Colby. I've seen how you fold and I think it's a good thing that I did this." He scoffs and sighs, "Yeah. You're right."

You gasp, jumping towards him as you feel the same feeling on your leg, "That fucking ghost cat. I swear to god."

"I'll have to ask Brian tomorrow if they had a cat for sure. But I'm going to just assume that with that lighting up red." Sam motions to the pod, "Means they did."

"Alright guys." Colby says into the camera, "So from the looks of it.." he starts laughing, "Y/n is going to be tormented by this ghost cat for the rest of the night."

"Glad you find humor is my time of horror." You laugh and move over next to Sam, "We should set something at the top of the steps. See if anything knocks it down or something."

Sam nods, "That's a good idea, too."

You look around the room, "Did you turn that camera on, Colby?" Colby nods, "Yeah, I turned it-" he looks t the camera, "It's off. I swear I turned it on."

"I'm pretty sure you did. I watched you." Sam hands you the camera and walks over to Colby, "The light was on for sure."

"Y/n."

"What?" You look up at Sam and Colby and they look at you confused. You laugh slightly, "Did one of you not just say my name?"

They shake their heads and Sam points, "I was messing with this camera and Colby was talking to me about it."

"That's so weird. It sounded like.. actually it sounded like Colby's voice saying my name." You step closer to them and look behind you, "I know they aren't going to hurt us, but I can't help but feel anxious."

"Are you okay?" Sam asks and you nod, "Oh yeah, I'm fine." You laugh slightly, "Kinda comical if you really think about it."

Sam laughs and looks at Colby, "Alright. Well if this doesn't stay on, we'll just have to make sure we record with this one where everything is placed."

Colby nods, "Alright. Yeah. I hope this stays o-" he whips his head around and lays a hand on his cheek, "Something just kissed me." He looks at you and Sam with wide eyes and he laughs, "I swear to god, it felt like lips on my cheek."

Sam turns the camera around on him and sighs, "I just want to say that If Colby doesn't leave with us, it's because he's staying with his new ghost girlfriend."

You cover your lips to hide your laughter and Sam looks at Colby and full out laughs, "I'm sorry. I had to, brother."

Colby rolls his eyes, "Let's just.." he laughs slightly, "Get out of here."

Sam pans the camera over everything that's set out before you leave the living area.

"I think we should go to, what did he say, Malcom's room?" Sam looks over at you and Colby, "Maybe we can find out how the fire that burned the original down."

"I brought the EMF meter, so we can ask yes or no questions." Colby digs into his bag and pulls it out, "I think his room was the third one on the left upstairs."

As you make your way down the hallway, Sam trips but catches himself, "Alright." He laughs slightly, "Colby did you trip me?"

"As much as I thought about it.. no, I didn't trip you." Colby smirks and looks around, "y/n. Did you trip Sam?"

"No." You shake your head and look at Sam, "Are you okay?"

He nods, "Yeah, no I'm good." He looks around, "That was like, right in front of you." He point to you and you raise your brows, "you know, as we were walking, it did feel like we walked through a cold bubble."

All three of you snap your heads behind you as you all hear what sounds like people running.

"I didn't like that." You step towards Sam and grab his arm, "That was close."

Sam holds onto your sweatshirt sleeve, "Yeah, that was almost like they were running towards us."

"Don't say that, Sam. Fuck. Now they'll come running at us." Colby laughs nervously and shakes his head, "Let's just.. get upstairs."

All three of you now walk at a quicker pace, still looking behind you and laughing when you do it at the same time.

"Careful on these steps." Sam tells you as he walks in front of you. You nod, holding onto the banister as you follow him up.

"Right here is where it felt like someone was with us during the tour." Colby motions to the stairs, "But it was when we were coming down."

"Wait.." you tap Sam and point, "Do you hear that? It sounds like the REM pod going off, like constantly."

They're silent for a few moments before looking at each other, "I bet you they're moving our stuff." Colby shakes his head, "Wanna go check it out now or?"

"Let's give it a little bit yet. We can go up here first." Sam looks up the steps and continues walking, "can you imagine tumbling down these steps though?"

You laugh slightly, "I feel like they're wide enough you wouldn't really get hurt if you tuck and rolled." You look at Colby and he shakes his head, "I'm not doing that."

"I want going to-"

He cuts you off, "I know you, y/n. I'm not tucking and rolling down these steps." He laughs and looks at the stairs, "Although.. it would be fun."

Sam laughs, "Let me know how you make out with that."

You reach the top of the stairs, looking both ways before continuing straight on, "Oh. Here." You point to the door that has Malcom in cursive letters.

Colby places his hand on the knob, twisting slowly as he pushes the door open, "Malcom, we're here to ask you a few questions."

You follow Colby in, Sam behind you.

"Hi Malcom." You look around and Sam walks in, "Hey Malcom, so we brought up our little device that allows you to light up green for yes and red for no as answers to our questions."

Colby gets it out, turning it on, "Alright. Who wants to go first?" You look between them and raise your hand, "I will."

You watch as Colby places the device on the stand and you look around, "Malcom.. are you here with us?"

A few minutes goes by, nothing.

"Is anyone here with us?" Sam asks and the reader lights up green, "Is this Malcom?"

The reader lights up red.

"Are you one of Malcom's brothers?" Colby asks and the reader lights up green. Colby looks up, "Hmm. Okay. What were his brother's names?"

"Miller and-" the reader lighting up green cuts you off, "Is this Miller?" It lights up green again and you motion, "It's Miller."

Sam laughs slightly and smirks as Colby shakes his head, "Thanks. I had no idea." He laughs and crosses his arms, "Miller, can you tell us if the fire that burned this house down was an accident?"

Lights up green.

"Was it caused by a prank you and your brothers were playing?" Sam asks and it lights up green then flashes to red.

"That's weird." You look between them, "Is there someone else here with you, Miller?"

Lights up green.

"Is it Monroe?" You nod as it lights up green, "I remember Brian saying that one of the kids was a trouble maker.. he took the-" you put air quotes, "Pranks.. too far."

"That's right." Sam nods, "Monroe, was it you that started the fire?"

Lights up green.

"Was it an accident?" Colby asks in a softer tone and it lights up green, "You didn't mean to light the house on fire?" Colby asks again and it lights up red.

You shiver slightly at the mixed signals, "I just got a chill." You feel the same cat-like rubbing against your leg and you jump, letting out a slight scream, "That fucking. Cat!"

You move over by Sam, standing close to him as you're dead set on laying eyes on this ghostly cat apparition.

"Again?" Sam turns, "What the hell is up with that?"

"Kitty likes y/n." Colby laughs and you glare at him, "At least I didn't get kissed by a ghost."

His laughter stops and he goes serious, "Shut up."

You snicker and take a deep breath, "I like cats... don't get me wrong.. but I like the ones I can actually see." Sam lays his hand on your back, keeping the camera on Colby, "You aren't scratched or anything are you?"

You shift to pull the leg of your pants up, "No." you shake your head, "nothing is here."

"Well that's good, at least." Sam looks to Colby, "Should we go to the parents room? See if we can talk to them?"

Colby nods, "Yeah but if I get kissed again, I'm out."

"Yeah, yeah." Sam laughs and you follow him to the door, "Thank you Miller and Malcom."

Colby walks out behind you, shutting the door, "If it wasn't for posting this.. I'd say we never speak about that ever again." He laughs.

"They like you, honestly can't blame them." Sam purses his lips together and looks away. Colby smirks and pretends to get shy, "oh shucks. Sam. You know how to speak to me just right."

You almost told Colby to stop flirting with your boyfriend but you caught yourself, laughing as you shake your head.

"Alright. Alright." Sam laughs, "I'm thinking we try and get something out of the next room then we go down and check our stuff."

"Works for me." You nod and Colby nods, "Alright, let's do this."

You make your way to the room at the end of the hall, opening the door and making your way in. As you walk in, you gasp, "I swear something moved."

"Where?" Sam points the camera to where you're pointing, "Like a figure?"

You nod, "Yeah, like a white figure just moved into the wall. It was quick."

"That could either be Matthias or his wife, Molly." Colby looks around and you nod, "They really like the M names, don't they?"

"I don't really know anything about that, but I've caught onto that, too." Sam motions to Colby, "Set out the EMF, Colby."

Colby turns it on, setting it down on the bed, "Is anyone here with us?"

Lights up green.

"Is it Molly?" You ask and it lights up green, "Was that you that I saw when we first came in?" It lights up green again and you sigh, "We mean no harm, Molly. We just want to ask you some more questions if that's okay."

It lights up green and you look at Sam, "Should we ask about Monroe?" He nods, "I mean, I think we should." You nod and look to Colby, "Your turn."

"Were you afraid of Monroe?" Colby asks and it lights up green then shuts up quickly. Colby looks at Sam, "That would make sense."

Sam nods, "Yeah. If he felt outcasted or something, you know?" Colby nods, "We're you scared of him because of his pranks?"

Lights up green.

"Did he want to cause harm?" Sam asks and you watch as it flashes from green to red repeatedly, "Are you unsure?"

Lights up green.

"Okay, Molly. That's fine. Thank you." Sam looks to you and then to Colby, "Should we go downstairs now?"

Colby nods, "Yeah. I'm actually curious to see what was moved." He walks over to the door, "Did you close this when you came in, Sam?"

He shakes his head, "No I left it open."

"Did you close it?" Colby looks at you and you shake your head, "I didn't touch the door." Colby looks to Sam, "Fucking hell. Okay." He tries to open the door but it doesn't open.

"Is it locked?" Sam asks walking up to him, "Hold on let me.." Sam bends down, using the flash on the camera to see.

As you're standing there, waiting for them to get the door open, you feel something grab your ankle. When you lift that one, something grabs your other one and you let out a yell, "Oh my god! Oh my god!"

You move over to Sam and Colby and point to the end of the bed, "Something grabbed my ankles." You squeeze between them and Sam wraps his arm around your waist, "I moved the one it grabbed first then it grabbed my other one."

"They just wanted to see you dance, y/n." Colby says, "Are you okay?"

"They could have just asked me. Damn." You laugh slightly, "Yeah. I'm good. Let's just get out of here." You turn to grab the knob and the door opens, "They did it on purpose, little shits."

Sam and Colby laugh quietly as they follow you out of the room, "Oh. Did you want to set something at the top here?" Sam points to the steps, "We can put.." he looks around and walks over to grab something off the stand, "This here."

You nod, "That'll work." Your eyes follow him as he sets the circular object down. Sam stands back up, "Alright. Let's head down."

You stay close to Sam as you walk down the steps, glancing behind you every so often. Colby does the same, "Ever since we came down these the first time I can't shake that someone is with us."

Sam nods, "These stairs are weird." He turns at the bottom, making sure you come down safely, "I don't know how to explain it, but you know what I mean."

Colby walks down, "Yeah, I know what you mean. It's like there's just something that lives on the stairs or whatever."

You look down the hall, "The REM is going off again."

"Is it?" Sam points the camera down the hall, "Yeah it is. Holy fuck." He looks at you before he starts walking, you and Colby follow.

"Wait." You stop, bending down to pick up one of their stickers but it's stuck to the floor, "Sam. Colby." You move back, pointing to the sticker, "Something stuck that here."

"No fucking way." Sam moves the camera over it, trying to lift it up, "That's actually insane."

Colby bends down, looking up at Sam, "I hope we can't get in trouble for this." He laughs slightly, "we didn't do that."

"That's actually scary." You run a hand through your hair and it feels like a strand is lifted up, "Oh my go-" you move away, running your hand over your hair, "Did you get that?" You look at Sam and he nods, "I honestly think so. Fuck. Here."

He cuts the camera off and replays what he just recorded. Sure enough, you see the strand lift up and you jump away, "Oh my god. You got it." You look up at him and Colby takes the camera, replaying it, "That's actually fucking crazy."

You laugh, "I can't believe that." You point, "let's go see what else is moved." You walk with them to the living room area and look over the room.

Colby's hoodie isn't on the table, folded like you left it. It's actually no where to be found.

Your water bottle is on its side, on the other table.

Sam's water bottle, is empty, but there isn't any water in it.

"I hope you weren't thirsty and I hope you didn't like that sweatshirt." You shake your head in disbelief, "Oh, my socks are separated and one is here and the other is... gone." You turn to look at Sam and Colby.

"I liked that sweatshirt." Colby's voice is in a higher tone and he pretends to pout, "Damn it." He laughs and Sam walks over, "There's only one sticker left. I laid out three. So the second one is.." he looks around, walking around the living room area, "I can't find it."

"Is the camera still on?" You point and Colby walks over. After a few seconds of messing with it, he looks up, "Come watch this."

You walk over, along with Sam and stand on either side of Colby. You both watch as Sam's water bottle slowly uncaps and falls over, almost like someone was gently laying it on its side.

"That's so weird." Sam laughs nervously, "Oh, y/n. Your water bottle just falls over."

"Does it show Colby's sweatshirt moving?" You ask and Colby shakes his head, "I don't think-" the camera shows Colby's sweatshirt moving and then it's almost like it lays over the camera before it shuts off, "..so."

"So.." Sam stands up and turns, "Your sweatshirt.. covered the camera.. then the camera cuts out... and now your sweatshirt is just... gone?"

You lean on the table with one hand, "Tricksters." You laugh slightly and shake your head, "I'm sure we'll find it somewhere. It has to be around here somewhere."

Colby looks around, "thats actually really good footage, when though we don't have much." Colby runs a hand over his face, "The fact that it's just gone.. my mind is blown right now."

"Why don't we split up?" Sam suggests and Colby snaps his head towards him, "What?"

You smirk and look away as Sam explains, "We have three cameras. Two of us take each hallway down here. One goes upstairs."

You quickly put your finger on your nose for going upstairs, "No nose goes."

Sam quickly puts his finger on his noses followed by Colby and he groan, "Fuuuuck me."

You laugh, "Have fun upstairs, Brock."

"Have fun with your ghost cat, y/l/n." Colby chuckles and you shrug, "At least mine doesn't try to kiss me."

"Alright children." Sam laughs, "Let's get y/n set up with a camera and then we can get started." Sam sets the camera down on the table to get into his backpack to get you your camera.

After getting situated, Sam starts rolling, "Alright guys. So we are splitting up." He looks between you and Colby, "Well each have a camera. I'm sending Colby with the REM pod. Y/n will have the EMF. I'll just have me myself and I."

"Yeah, that's what you get for making me go upstairs." Colby laughs, "Let's just do this. Meet at the bottom of the steps in what? Thirty minutes?"

You and Sam nod, "that sounds fair enough." You look at Sam and he smirks, "Works for me." He looks to Colby, "let's go."

You all walk to the bottom of the steps and say your jokingly goodbyes before you all part ways. You were honestly kind of nervous to be on your own, but you knew you were meeting up with Sam any minute now.

You walk down the hall, looking at each door and picture frame that was hung on the wall, "That's the family guys." You point the camera to the picture of the Seebold family and take a deep breath as you continue walking.

You round the corner and stop when you hear the faint sound of footsteps, "Fuck. Okay. There's footsteps.. like someone is walking.. somewhere." You whisper to the camera, "Oh my god. I'm actually shitting my pants right now."

You laugh quietly and force yourself to keep walking. You reach your hand out, feeling the wall end and you go to turn the corner but you run into something and it grabs your arm.

You scream slightly but Sam turns his flashlight on, pointing it on himself, "Hey. It's me! It's me!"

You let out a sigh, "Holy fuck, Sam." You lay a hand on your chest, "I didn't know these hallways connected like this.”

He nods, "Neither did I."

You catch your breath and look up at him, and it's instant fire. You were finally alone with him.

And you had thirty minutes to spare.

"Come on." Sam smirks and pulls you into one of the rooms. It's mainly empty, but you didn't need much.

Sam turns his camera off and sets it down, along with yours and his hands are instantly on your waist, pinning you against the wall.

"Ever since you said something about it, it's all I could think about." He mumbles against your lips. You nod, "Mhm."

Your hands slide up his chest, intertwining your fingers with his hair. He slides a hand down, slipping it into the band of your leggings, "gotta be quick and quiet."

He drops down to his knees, pulling your leggings down to below your knees. You nod, watching as he slides his hands up your thighs. He pulls your panties to the side and rises up slightly.

You spread your legs as far as your leggings will let you before Sam leans in, lips wrapping around your clit.

You press your hand hard against your mouth to muffle your moans. Your other hand is on his head.

He lowly groans against you as he digs his fingers into your legs. You roll your hips forward, everything becoming nothing but you and him right now.

His tongue drags against your folds and you whimper. He looks up at you, moving to stand up as his fingers replace his tongue.

You moan as he pushes his fingers into you. He rests his forehead against yours, "You're so wet."

You tilt your head back to look up at him and his lips crash onto yours. You wrap an arm around his neck, grinding your hips down onto his hand.

"Wait.." you pull away breathing heavy, "wait."

"What, babe?" Sam looks at you confused and you look at him, "That sounds.. I swear I just heard Colby yelling."

He pulls his fingers from you and you hike your pants back up, "Like it sounded faint which makes sense because he's upstairs, but like."

Sam looks at you, "That?"

You listen for a minute and nod when you hear Colby yell again, "Yes. Yes that!"

"Sam! Y/n!"

You and Sam grab your cameras, turning them on when you get out into the hall. Sam takes a deep breath, "Yo Colby!"

Nothing.

"Okay. So I ran into y/n. We didn't know these hallways meet, and now we hear Colby yelling." Sam explains as he points the camera to him.

"Wait. Sam. What if they're just mocking him? Like trying to trick us? Isn't that what they did earlier to me when they said my name and it sounded like his voice?" You look at Sam and he looks at you, "it could be, but I don't want to take any chances."

You and Sam make your way down the hall and you stop, "Did you light these?" You point to the lit candles on the stand and Sam shakes his head, "No."

You look behind you, "Sounds like someone's walking." You look to Sam and back behind you, "Colby? Did you light these candles?"

Nothing.

"Alright let's just go fi-"

As you and Sam round the corner to the steps, a cat meowing at you both on the corner of the stand, makes you and Sam let out a loud ass scream, catching you off guard.

Sam grabs your hand and pulls you with him, dragging you with to the bottom of the stairs, "What the fuck?!"

"A fucking cat!? Was that a cat!?" You yell, looking up at Sam, "There's a real life fucking cat!?" You scream, clinging to Sam as your breathing is rapid, "What the fuck? Colby!!"

"Colby!" Sam yells, holding you close, "Colby there's a fucking cat!"

The ball shaped object that Sam placed at the top of the steps comes bouncing down, causing you and Sam to freeze.

You slowly turn your head, looking at Sam until you hear the sound of footsteps coming at you. You grab onto Sam tighter, letting out a scream, "Colby! Sam there were footsteps coming at us."

Sam pulls you closer,"Yo, Colby. Come on man!" He looks around, catching glimpse of the cat comes running over, but it doesn't register with him right away, so he takes off running.

"Sam!" You scream, "Where are you-" you let out a scream as the cat rubs up against your leg and Sam comes back quickly to grab you to pull you with him, "I thought you were behind me!"

"I'm over this!" You yell out, laughing slightly, "There's no way that's a cat. And that ball. What the hell."

"Yo. Colby!" Sam screams as you walk back over to the steps, "Let's go man!"

"What the fuck is happening down here?" Colby yells as he comes down the top flight of stairs, "All I heard was you both absolutely lo-"

Colby trips, rolling down the steps with a grunt, "oh fuck."

You and Sam run over to him, kneeling down next to him, "Colby. Hey. You with us?" Sam taps his face and he nods, "Yeah. I landed on the camera."

"I honestly think I got that on camera." You cover your mouth and try not to laugh. Colby chuckles but grunts in pain, "I need to see that."

The cat that's been following you all night, runs up and sits on Colby's chest. He does a double take, pointing, "It's a fucking cat."

You nod, "It's a fucking cat."

"That cat about made me shit my pants." Sam sighs, "We came around the one corner, because we heard you yelling and it was sitting eye level on a shelf and just meowed."

"So it's not a ghostly cat." Colby scratches its head and furrows his brows, "Wait." He goes to sit up and Sam helps him, "You said you heard me yelling?"

You and Sam both nod and Colby shakes his head, "I was chillen in the upstairs library the whole time until I heard your guys ruckus."

"You were right." Sam looks at you and you nod, "They were tricking us."

"Wait.. again.." Colby looks between the two of you and points back and forth, "Why were you two together?"

"The hallways meet. I kept following it and I ran into her. Scared the shit out of her." Sam laughs and you nod with a smile, "Yeah, I thought I was dying."

"Your smile tells me different, y/n." Colby tilts his head, "Is there going to be sex footage on those cameras?"

"Oh my god, Colby. No!" You stand up, holding your hand out, along with Sam's to help Colby up. He grabs both of your hands, standing up then reaching down to grab the camera.

"You turned your camera off right?" Sam leans in and whispers as quiet as possible. You nod, "Yeah. Did you?"

Sam nods, "I think."

"Secrets don't make friends." Colby clicks his tongue, "Just tell me my assumptions are right."

"And what are your assumptions, Colby?" You cross your arms, tilting your head. Colby smirks, nodding from you to Sam, "Yall are dating.. aren't ya."

Sam's the first one to break, "I wanted to tell you, brother. But this was just something that we.." Sam trails off and looks at you to continue speaking, "We were living in the moment of being the only two that knew. We planned on telling you tonight, I swear."

Colby stares at both of you, "So no one else knows?"

You and Sam both nod, "Right."

"So I'm the first person to know?" Colby raises his brows and you nod, "yes. Colby. You're the first person to know.”

He celebrates, "Yes!"

The sound of an echoing laugh cuts your moment short, “I hate to rain on everyone’s parade, but can we just get our shit and get out of here?”

.·:*¨ ✘ ¨*:·.

I feel like this sucks, but it’s something for now. I’ve also been violently sick for the last few days, but I’m coming out of that and hoping to get some good shit out to you!

Thank you for reading!

Likes and reblogs are appreciated 🖤

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silvermoon424 · 5 months

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The Personification of The Most Terrifying Thing In this World

#SHE'S SO EVIL #fuck mondays #funny #manga #one shot #comic #comedy manga

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fitzrove · 12 days

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Started watching a "problem with greek myth retellings" video and it began with a blurb montage like "Condemned by the misogynist guys of history, this is the true girlboss feminist story of [A WOMAN]" and like. brb writing one of those about crown prince rudolf. It's ok he's like a misunderstood girlboss to me<3

#NASJASKSDFKDSLFDGJDFJ #joking. since those retellings seem to be often bad #fun fact i do have ideas for like a black teen comedy series with mary as the protagonist where the ending is like a harrowing twist #like you think it won't go that far but it does and the point is that she had historical agency and her own problems and personal journey #but in the end it spiralled catastrophically due to both crown prince rudolf related events and others #unfortunately writing one would draw the ire of both misogynist rudolf conspiracy theorists (how dare you suggest women have agency) AND a #certain type of feminist media critiquer person: (1) how dare you cover a topic like that flippantly 2) how dare you make rudolf anything #but an inhuman monster of a r*pist murderer gr**mer or whatever in the story #like idk man.. other male characters portrayed as romantic interests in mainstream media are toxic r*pists all the time. like omg i hate ho #'the great' handles p*ter and catherine because i was rooting for them to remain toxic and for catherine to kill him or whatever but then #she starts falling in love with him in s2 and everyone in tumblr is like omg hot sexy toxic romance. like cant we have ONE series where #straight romance doesnt inevitably become the overbearing focus?? i had wlw ships for that show.. they never pulled through...#anyway um yeah. the way i would portray rudolf in that is that mary sees him as this romantic hero which is emphasised in the way its shot #but he's constantly acting in kinda offputting and strange ways and is occasionally pretty pathetic and weird ASHDJFJF #^^ that's never been a deterrent to anyone ever. most rudolf biographers want to [redacted] him this has been proven by the way they write.#the only ones that dont are me (well not a real biographer but a rudolf enjoyer nonetheless) and brigitte hamann /hj #(she actually doesnt salivate over his appearance like frederick morton does xD only quotes 2 contemporary women commenting on it)

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sp0o0kylights · 11 months

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Q: Why wasn’t there an Adopt a Jock (lol I wrote this as Adopt a Joke. Sorry Steve.) update this week? (slash sevenish days Idk time is dumb)

A: It was Steddie Big Bang Time! I am so excited to work with both my artists, and REALLY fricken excited to finally be able to give ya’ll a snippet.

They mention Hopper’s death here but its pre S4, they don’t know he’s actually alive.

Eddie

"Tonight is a good night for the other guy, not me, to die."

--What We Do In The Shadows

A scenario for you to ponder:

You are trapped in the dead police chief's cabin. With you are your three best friends, your life-long gay crush, and several children, one of which is supposedly telekinetic.

Maybe two.

You're not sure because one of the demonic plant-penis dogs prowling around in packs outside gave you a concussion.

You have two options available to you.

Option One) you and your loser friends hunker down with your hands over your ears while Mr. Sexy Chest and the children figure a way out.

This option has the highest chance of you and your besties surviving, unscathed.

Option Two) You tell Mr. Sexy Chest that you know how to hotwire cars and can likely get the police truck outside running in an ill fated attempt at impressing his very straight (and very firm) ass.

This option has the biggest chance of you dying, a virgin sacrifice to the monsters in the woods like every horror movie idiot known to man.

Eddie Munson, elbow deep in wires, cursed himself for being a very stupid man.

"Can I just say, for the record, that this is really dumb?" He huffed, wiping sweat off his brow with the back of his hand.

The truck had clearly been sitting here since the old man had died. Likely before then, because Eddie had taken one look at the wires underneath the steering wheel and knew immediately the engine was going to need some work before he even bothered trying to wake her.

Steve, who had a hip rested against the truck, turned to look over his shoulder, down at where Eddie was ducked under the raised hood. "You can but it won't make you feel better."

"Great." Eddie said, planting both hands on either side of the engine.

Fucking truck.

Fucking--monsters, and the military and Steve Harrington holding a bloody bat with nails in it casually, like guarding Eddie’s back while he stole a cop car was just a casual Tuesday to him.

It probably was, considering all Eddie had heard.

"Does it help any if I tell you this is actually one of our better plans, and not just because we usually don't get to spend a lot of time on them?" Steve said it like a peace offering, instead of the absolute insanity it sounded like.

Eddie sighed. "No Steve, it doesn't."

"I didn't think it would.” Steve replied and from the corner of his eye, Eddie watched him rub his nose. “It is a little funny though."

He looked like he was trying to hold back a smile, like he somehow actually found them having spent a solid two hours coming up with a plan to be hilarious, and if it didn’t make his entire being glow brighter than the dumb yellow sweater he was wearing, Eddie would have cursed him out.

"God I hate how cute you are." Eddie muttered instead, sticking his head back in the engine. If he could just connect this one wire-!

Then his brain caught up with his mouth.

‘Oh my god I can’t believe I just said that out loud.

"What?" Steve asked, confused, and oh, thank god.

“I said I hated how cut up the wires are. Hand me some of that black tape would you?” Eddie said, sticking his hand up, thanking every deity he could think of that his mouth hadn’t managed to out him.

He’d gotten too far in this backwards, hick town to get murdered now.

Muttered angrily to himself under his breath as he continued to do his best to get Hopper’s old clunker up and running.

He wasn’t sure how this guy had the thing going for as long as he did, but as far as Eddie could tell?

The truck ran on magic and well-wishes, both of which they were fresh out of.

“Come on, come on…” Eddie coaxed, as he finally managed to successfully splice and tape the two wires he’d been fiddling with together.

It wasn’t a solid fix, but it should be enough to get them out of here.

"Dude it's okay. If you're like--freaked out." Steve said abruptly, and where the hell had that come from!?

Eddie slammed his wrench down on the edge of the truck, standing up from the bent over crouch he’d been in so he could face Harrington.

"Steve,” He deadpanned, “I think anyone who isn’t freaked out by all this has something wrong with them."

He got a defensive look in return. "I'm just saying! It's normal! You don't have to brave face it or anything, we've all collectively had a lot of breakdowns over this."

He just got a stare in return.

For a brief second he thinks maybe Steve is bringing up last night. That he’s suddenly returned to his King Shit status, rubbing it in Eddie’s face how he’d had not just one breakdown when the demodogs attacked but another one later, when all the adrenaline had left him with nothing but mounting anxiety and panic.

Except when Steve turns to look at him his face isn’t mocking at all, and--oh.

Oh.

Steve, Eddie realized with abrupt clarity, was giving Eddie the speech he wishes someone had given him.

This wasn't another weird language game or that fake-nice thing people did where they act friendly to get an up front show of Eddie’s weirdness, just to make fun of him later for it.

This is honestly. Plain and simple.

Eddie doesn’t know what to do with it.

“Thanks.” He manages, voice now quiet. “That’s…thanks.”

Steve looks away again, rubbing the back of his neck and god, where was this Steve Harrington in high school? Yeah Eddie had seen glimpses of him in his senior year but what about all the years prior?

The guy before him in jeans and a yellow sweater gave off sad single mother vibes so hard Eddie felt an urge to hug him until all the bullshit went away.

Except the bullshit wasn’t just the seven annoying freshmen, but also crazy monsters and shit.

“She uh, she should run now.” Eddie said awkwardly, tapping the car as he turned to remove the few tools he and Steve had managed to scrounge up. “I won’t turn her on until we’re ready to go though, because we’re boned if we turn her off.”

Steve snorted at that, mouthing “boned” at him and Eddie gave a feral grin in response. Stepped into his space, because how could he not, and clapped Steve on a sweater-clad shoulder.

“Get the kiddos, Stevie. We’ve got an eagle to fly us out of Mordor.”

#this is very unedited #steddie #well this part is pre steddie #this one gets there faster than my normal for once #probably bc the whole things a one shot #hellfire joins the party #steve harrington #eddie munson #theyre stuck in Hop's cabin right now #this is very heavily based off of various comedy horror movies and books #predominantly John Dies at the End series #But also cabin in the woods evil dead tucker and dale vs evil #all the good stuff #also backrooms starcourt but thats later #right now its just eddie cursing life itself as he gets sucked into this shit

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