bedlamsbard
she makes her own dystopia as she goes
Bedlam on Archive of Our Own.
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CANNOT get over this dude's commitment to the bit
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Sometimes fiction doesn’t have a moral to the story. Sometimes fiction points at something and goes “Ever thought about THAT???” And you look at what it’s pointing at for a bit.
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i saw your art on twitter, it's very good but the fact you have minors following you while you draw literal witches ("creatures" practicing m*gic) is REALLY iffy
it's over. 17th century puritan philip wittebane has found my tumblr at last. sorry i failed you general
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i hear a good lyric and start mentally holding up blorbos like im in the home depot paint aisle comparing swatches
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You know how there's a subset of martial arts Tiktok where people post short vids of them doing a quick routine/choreography?
People in Gotham post blurry clips of the Bats, and a few martial artists challenge each other to reproduce the moves. One vid goes viral and more people start to give it a try, including non martial artists, who just meme with the choreography/try to imitate some moves just in good fun (and whoa some dancers and gymnasts do surprisingly well)
It naturally gets back to the Wayne brood, except, of course, the real challenge for them is to fail in a believable way.
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Tim, on camera: "I was nearly good enough for the Olympics, surely I can do that...? Let's find out."
[cue footage of him falling down, cartoon-style, right as Damian was walking by and getting both of them drenched in Dami's smoothie]
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Jason sees the compilation someone made of Bruce's ridiculous attempts at reproducing the moves (Tim and Steph roped him into their shenanigans.)
Two days later, a video of Red Hood goes viral: it's him condescendingly explaining how to throw a punch and challenging Bruce Wayne to do it properly because "no Gothamite should be so shit at fighting"
Bruce is verklempt when he watches it, because some of it is word-for-word how he taught baby!Jay
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Tim gives Damian blurry, grainy footage of Black Bat to imitate. After that, Dami spends days hounding Cass for training because he nearly broke his nose tripping over his own feet.
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Dick flawlessly lands a flip in front of all the others with "ASSERTING DOMINANCE" written on screen before winking at the camera.
Right before the video cuts, Tim's voice can be heard saying, "Whatever, your ass is still flat compared to Nightw—"
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Florence Pugh behind the Scenes of Hawkeye (2021)
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Amboseli National Park, Kenya
📸 Julius Dadalti
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it is once again... binturong appreciation hour
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writing historical fiction will make you google things like “when we’re towels invented?” “how much did a towel cost in American in 1885?” “historical average number of towels owned per household”
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one of my students tried to explain "vagueposting" to me yesterday and I had to very gently tell them that that is not a new concept and I am in fact quite familiar with it. no I don't know what kids these days are doing on their social media because I am terminally online but in like. a generation back kind of way. online generation, which is, what, a couple of years?
#we were talking about it because I have them doing a 'modernize these pliny letters' assignment#your girl
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About 130 words written today. Weird feeling day today in general, for various reasons. My main campus is in panic mode after yesterday (classes online, a bunch of buildings like the library closing early), but on Fridays I'm over at the institution I'm adjuncting at and they're totally normal, so a weird vibe. I was supposed to have an online workshop today, but it got rescheduled since there's an emergency faculty meeting. Stressed for other reasons as well. Today ended up being a three movie day? Which I probably needed, but also, what. (The two Top Gun movies, which I haven't seen before, and the USS Indianapolis movie, which was, uh, terrible. Real life tragedy, terrible movie.)
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Can you explain this gap in your blog history
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Charles Baudelaire - Reversibility ~ The Flowers of Evil
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My Biggest and Most Annoying Fictional Horse Pet Peeve
Big Horses are a Very New Thing and they Likely Didn’t Exist in your Historical and/or Fantasy Settings.
You’ve all seen it in every historical piece of media ever produced. Contrary to popular belief, a big black horse with long legs and long flowing mane is not a widespread or even a particularly old type of horse.
THIS IS NOT A MEDIEVAL THING. THIS IS NOT EVEN A BAROQUE THING. THIS IS A NINETEENTH CENTURY CITY CARRIAGE HORSE.
All the love to fancy Friesian horses, but your Roman general or Medieval country heroine just really couldn’t, wouldn’t, and for the sake of my mental health shouldn’t have ridden one either.
Big warmblood horses are a Western European and British invention that started popping up somewhere around 1700s when agriculture and warfare changed, and when rich folks wanted Bigger Faster Stronger Thinner race horses.
The modern warmblood and the big continental draught both had their first real rise to fame in the 1800s when people started driving Fancy Carriages everywhere, and having the Fanciest Carriage started to mean having the Tallest and Thinnest Horses in the town.
Before mechanised weaponry and heavy artillery all horses used to be small and hardy easy-feeders. Kinda like a donkey but easier to steer and with a back that’s not as nasty and straight to sit on.
SOME REAL MEDIEVAL, ROMAN, OTTOMAN, MONGOL, VIKING, GREEK and WHATEVER HISTORICALLY PLAUSIBLE HORSES FOR YOU:
“Primitive”, native breeds all over the globe tend to be only roughly 120-140 cm (12.0 - 13.3 hh) tall at the withers. They all also look a little something like this:
Mongolian native horse (Around 120-130 at the withers, and decendants of the first ever domesticated horses from central Asia. Still virtually unchanged from Chinggis Khan’s cavalry, ancestor to many Chinese, Japanese and Indian horses, and bred for speed racing and surviving outdoors without the help of humans.)
Carpathian native horse / Romanian and Polish Hucul Pony (Around 120-150 at the withers, first mentioned in writing during the 400s as wild mountain ponies, depicted before that in Trajanian Roman sculptures, used by the Austro-Hungarian cavalry in the 19th century)
Middle-Eastern native horse / Caspian Pony (Around 100-130 at the withers, ancestor of the Iranian Asil horse and its decendants, including the famous Arabian and Barb horses, likely been around since Darius I the Great, 5th century BC, and old Persian kings are often depicted riding these midgets)
Baltic Sea native horse / Icelandic, Finnish, Estonian, Gotland and Nordland horses (Around 120-150 at the withers, descendant of Mongolian horses, used by viking traders in 700-900 AD and taken to Iceland. Later used by the Swedish cavalry in the 30 years war and by the Finnish army in the Second World War, nowadays harness racing and draught horses)
Siberian native horse / Yakutian pony (Around 120-140 at the withers, related to Baltic and Mongolian horses and at least as old, as well-adapted to Siberian climate as woolly mammoths once were, the hairiest horse there is, used in draught work and herding)
Mediterranean native horse / Skyros pony, Sardinian Giara, Monterufolino (Around 100-140 at the Withers, used and bred by ancient Greeks for cavalry use, influenced by African and Eastern breeds, further had its own influence on Celtic breeds via Roman Empire, still used by park ranger officers in Italy)
British Isles’ native horse / various “Mountain & Moorland” pony breeds (Around 100-150 at the withers, brought over and mixed by Celts, Romans and Vikings, base for almost every modern sport pony and the deserving main pony of all your British Medieval settings. Some populations still live as feral herds in the British countryside, used as war mounts, draught horses, mine pit ponies, hunting help and race horses)
So hey, now you know!
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👅
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