#but please don't forget that many others are suffering too
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this ramadan please don't forget our brothers and sisters in sudan, yemen and syria
#everyones main focus is palestine#but please don't forget that many others are suffering too#all the time#free sudan#syria#yemen#sudan#free palestine#palestine#free gaza#gaza#ramadan 2024
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What I Want You To Know About Long COVID
Well lads, I've been suffering from Long COVID for over a year now. My life is at a complete standstill. I'm 25 years old and I'm too sick to go back to school, I can't work, I had to move back in with my parents and I'm still stuck here.
Here are just a few things I wish people knew about Long COVID, including things I didn't know myself until I got it.
COVID destroys your immune system. Yes, even if you don't have Long COVID. Are you getting sick more often now? When you get sick, does it last longer? There are many studies showing that COVID causes t cell depletion, even in mild COVID cases! T cells are how your body remembers how to fight off infections you've had before so losing those cells? Bad news.
Your initial infection can be mild and you can still get Long COVID. Right from Yale Medicine, "Most people with Long COVID had mild acute COVID." (This is also a good link for a basic Long COVID overview).
There can be a gap of time between when you "get better" from the initial COVID infection to the onset of Long COVID symptoms. Some people get sick with an initial COVID infection and never get better. Some get better and then weeks or months later start developing Long COVID symptoms. Long COVID symptoms can even fluctuate over time, can go away for months and then suddenly come back.
So many people have Long COVID and don't realize it. Do you feel more tired lately but no matter how much you sleep, nothing helps? Is it harder to concentrate at work or school? Can you just not think like you used to? You could have Long COVID and not even know it. Even mild post-COVID symptoms are still Long COVID.
COVID can do anything to your body. Long COVID has over 200 recognized symptoms and can affect basically any part or system of your body. There is no one mechanism or cause of Long COVID which unfortunately also means there's no one cure either.
The effects of COVID are cumulative. Each COVID reinfection increases your chances of developing Long COVID. COVID is also affecting your body in other ways, yes, even if you're otherwise young and healthy! "Repeat COVID-19 infections increase risk of organ failure, death".
Once you have Long COVID, repeat COVID infections will make your symptoms worse. "80% [of Long COVID patients] saw their symptoms worsen [from reinfection]. In 60% of people who were in recovery or remission from Long COVID, reinfection caused a recurrence of Long COVID."
There is a lot more I want to say about Long COVID but I want to keep this post at least somewhat manageable to read. Like how when COVID is contracted during pregnancy, those COVID-exposed fetuses have a 6.3-fold increased risk of motor developmental delays, or that another study found 50% of babies exposed to COVID in utero had developmental delays.
You need to keep caring about COVID, for others around you and also for yourself even if you're "healthy". Everyone is at risk. And don't forget 40-60% of COVID infections are asymptomatic, which is why masking even if you feel fine is crucial. The only way right now to not get Long COVID is to not get COVID in the first place. It's not too late, if you've stopped masking it's never too late to start again! I know it's easy to get distracted by things in your life that seem more real than the possibility of getting sick some time in the future, and the peer pressure to not mask can be intense. But it only feels less real or less important until your entire life is having Long COVID. Trust me.
I know this is a complicated issue, many people can't afford to stay home when sick even if they want to because of their jobs, there are disgusting policies trying to ban wearing masks, but please if you can. Keep masking. Masking works, masking saves lives.
This post got a bit longer than I wanted so below the cut is a non-exhaustive list of my Long COVID symptoms and some of my experiences as one of the "healthy young people" who got "unlucky". cw brief mention of suicidal ideation.
Welcome to the Thunderdome that is my body with Long COVID. Keep in mind these are just my experiences and symptoms, Long COVID can cause any range of symptoms at varying severities.
Dysautonomia: Exercise intolerance, Post-Exertional Malaise (PEM), fatigue, and heat intolerance. What do those things mean? Here's some specific examples. Absolutely terrible circulation I am so cold all the time but also, if I get a little too warm I will pass out. Eating hot food makes my heart rate spike, I sweat, my body feels heavy. Blood pooling and pins and needles in my feet when I walk. Don't even think about exercising past walking, it's impossible. I used to work out an hour a day 4 times a week and now walking up one flight of stairs makes my heart pound and I can't breathe. Can't take even just warm showers anymore or I will pass out. Heat rashes from being in the sun for 10 minutes.
Digestive issues: Honestly too many to name but: constant bloating, extreme nausea, constipation, slow motility, lack of appetite, just so much cramping and pain. I lost 18 pounds from Long COVID, as someone who was already considered underweight their entire life, and almost had to get a shunt put into my chest to deliver nutrients because I was nearly completely unable to eat. For the first 6 months of Long COVID, if I could manage 600 calories a day, that was a good day.
Histamine intolerance: Oh boy. My worst symptoms, I don't even know where to start with it. If you know Mast Cell Activation Syndrome (MCAS) it's very similar. I can only eat 19 foods. If i eat a single bite of something not on that list, it's 48 hours of absolute hell. Coughing, migraines, itchy eyes, such extreme nausea I cannot even describe it, panic/feeling of doom, racing heart rate, derealization, rash, uncontrollable muscle tremors. I only learned about histamine intolerance 5 months into having Long COVID so before that, I was experiencing these symptoms nearly every single day. Terrifying isn't even a strong enough word to describe how it felt to experience all this and have no idea what it was, how to stop it, or if it would ever stop. Really dark times.
Neurological issues: More of that derealization. Inability to concentrate. Anxiety. OCD-like symptoms such as thoughts getting "stuck" in my head, repeating 24/7 completely unable to stop them, genuinely felt like my brain had cracked open and I had lost my mind. Constant dizziness like I'm on a boat.
Sleep issues: I sleep like garbage. I have insomnia, I wake up dozens of times every night and every single time I sleep I have intensely vivid dreams. I can't sleep longer than 7 hours total no matter how exhausted I am. It is exhausting. I'm exhausted, I'm so so tired.
And finally. Just. Really intense suicidal ideation. My body, my health, my entire life has been stolen from me because someone else decided my life was worth less to them than wearing a mask or staying home if they feel sick. Before I got Long COVID, I was preparing to go to South Korea to teach English, then on to a PhD in neurolinguistics, I was supposed to meet my long distance partner and had already booked plane tickets when I got sick. All of that has been destroyed.
Most of us with Long COVID are stuck in a cycle of being extremely sick, then if you're lucky you'll slowly get better over months, just to get reinfected and go right back where you started or worse. Honestly, I'm not scared of dying from COVID. I'm scared of living for a long time, suffering from Long COVID the entire time. This isn't living.
I don't know how to end this now. I'm still fighting, I'm trying experimental treatments, I'm not giving up yet. I hope everyone reading this stays healthy and well.
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Hello! I saw your rules so I decided to I guess rerequest in the way you asked. I was wondering if you could write about a female reader coming in one day with a sundress and Miguel just goes absolutely feral. He’s just trying to keep it professionally but ends up failing and just going ham on the reader
OMG anon i'm kissing your brain hehehehe (summer is killing us all besties : please don't forget to hydrate yourself <3)
summary : miguel sees you in a sundress
content warning : SMUT (18+) minors dni, fingering, biting and marking, this man is so in love with you, fem!reader, no use of Y/N, praise
word count : 1,6k
Summer had arrived, and as in most dimensions, except for the apocalyptic two or three where everything was frozen or the weather had simply declined with little chance of a return, it was hot.
And although the air-conditioning was in every room and corridor of the spider society, that in no way prevented members from dressing a little more lightly, although some might find this a sign of a lack of professionalism, one in particular, needless to mention, whose name began with Mi and ended with Guel.
Today was a fairly hot day, and all the spiders were practically fighting for ice cubes, a spot of coolness that would bring them comfort. Many of them were dressed in shorts, a variety of shirts, t-shirts, skirts and even tank tops.
So you seized the opportunity and put on a summer dress. It was charming, in your favourite colour, not too long and not too short, stopping just above the knees, with a beautifully plunging neckline to show off your curves. It was light, incredibly comfortable to wear, and needless to say that in spider society, it was a change to see you like this.
Like most of the members, people were used to seeing you in your suit, or in civilian clothes that could be considered professional. But this dress? It was a little ray of freshness.
Miguel was chatting in the cafeteria with Jessica and Peter, all having a serious discussion that you were supposed to join. You entered the cafeteria, looking around for them.
"Oh, hey over here!" called Peter to you with a smile, "Oh. My. God. What's the occasion for you dressing like that?"
Miguel, who until now had been stubbornly focused on getting Peter to stand still for this meeting, huffed before turning his head and...
He became static, his breath caught, his eyes wide open as he watched you come towards him. All the others were oysters, and you were a pearl: the best of them all, the most beautiful, the purest.
You offered a gentle smile as you came closer, and his lips parted slightly as the gesture gave him the warmth of thousands of sunbeams.
"It's true that you look ravishing, cutie," Jess admitted as you sat down next to Miguel, facing the other two on the opposite side of the table. "What's the occasion?" she repeated after Peter's question.
"Yeah," said Miguel, clearing his throat as he straightened up and pretended to keep a straight face, "what's the occasion?
You gave them all a small, smiling laugh.
"Nothing in particular, I'm just trying to beat the heat," you said as you took your seat, "why? I shouldn't have?" The possibility that your attire might pose a problem in maintaining the balance of the multiverse hadn't occurred to you.
"No!" The strength with which Miguel denied this surprised you all.
He swallowed, his sentence had come out a little stronger and a little more involved than he had intended.
"No," he pulled himself together as he took on his usual grumpy tone that everyone knew well, "although it's a lack of professionalism, we're not going so far as to prevent your freedom of clothing in the Society."
Well caught up, he thought as he brought his glass of water to his lips. Around the table, he was the only one wearing his suit. Because it was made of pixels and produced by a refined technological composite, he didn't suffer from the heat. Jess was wearing a t-shirt and cycling shorts, Peter a shirt and trousers, and you your summer dress.
Jess and Peter exchanged a quick glance, a mischievous smile stretching across their lips. Most of the elite and close teammates knew about your relationship with Miguel, and although he wasn't always the most public about your relationship, he cared about you immensely, and they both could only imagine the effect you were having on him.
"So, what did I miss?" you asked.
Jess started to explain the situation, but Miguel wasn't really listening. His eyes were obviously riveted on you, and even when he tried to refocus on the conversation, his thoughts and eyes were redirected in your direction as if magnetised.
You were... radiant, beautiful, and... for a moment his eyes went down to the bench you were sharing: the skirt part of your dress was slightly pleated, exposing the skin of your slightly spread thighs, sinking into the space where your cunt was.
He suddenly had the urge to slide his hand over your soft skin, to press it between his fingers and see the bounce of it brimming over under the grip of his hand.
And your cleavage was showing your bare skin, and he wanted to kiss your neck, to nibble your collarbone as he kissed down to the hollow of your breasts...
Keeping his hands to himself was becoming complicated, every little movement you made, even if it was just to readjust your sleeve over your shoulder, was becoming intoxicating. How was it possible to become even hotter by wearing more clothes?
His professionalism really started to take a hit when your leg inadvertently brushed against his, a shiver running down his spine.
But he couldn't touch you here, there was no tablecloth at this cafeteria table that could conceal his desires.
How he longed to do it, even if it was just to touch your thigh with his fingers, to run his hands over your sublimely covered body and to-
"Miguel? Can you remind us about what the last reports stipulated considering the last anomaly?" asked Peter, bursting Miguel's thought bubble, "I can't remember it for the life of me, it must be the heat." he complained. "What do you guys say we postpone this meeting? I can't think straight no matter how many fresh cocktails i drink."
It was true that the glasses had accumulated on Peter's side. A sigh escaped Jessica's lips.
" I regret to say it, but I agree. We can't think properly with the temperature."
Tell me about it, thought Miguel. He didn't care about the temperature, the real distraction was you. He exchanged a glance with you, and you looked at him with a small smile, waiting for his answer.
"Good," he said, simply nodding. "I won't detain you, you can leave."
Peter let out a small chirp, he and Jess getting up from the table to leave. Once away, you turned to Miguel, tilting your head to the side in playful puzzlement.
"The great Miguel O'Hara closing a meeting like that? Summer really does have its magic."
If summer could let him see you every day in that outfit, he'd make sure it lasted forever. His eyes roamed your silhouette again, biting the inside of his cheek. His hand skimmed the side of your leg, hovering gently over it until he placed it on the inside of your thigh, pressing.
You breathed a small sigh of relief, his eyes returning to yours.
"I'm guessing you like the dress," you said more softly.
"Very," he replied simply.
His behaviour was becoming less and less... acceptable in public. So he took your hand and led you out of the cafeteria. Would he be able to wait until you returned to his quarters ? Probably not.
But he knew every nook and cranny of the building, it was his, so you passed down one corridor, then two, then three, until you came to an alleyway you'd never seen before, darkened by the lack of activity.
He glanced in each direction, then immediately came to press you against the first wall you came to, kissing you hungrily.
"That dress is going to be the death of me," he murmured as he came to kiss your cheek followed by your neck, his hands placed on your waist and thigh as he feasted on your skin.
His hand slid up your leg, gripping the warm skin of your thigh as you let out a moan. His fingers moved up your inner thigh almost hastily, unable to contain his need to touch you.
"You're so pretty," he breathed as he came back to kiss you, "all pretty for me, nena."
His fingers reached the fabric of your panties, your body arching. His fingers went under the elastic of the latter and down to your cunt.
"Tengo la novia más linda del mundo," he whispered, kissing the back of your neck, tracing the line of your pulse as he made circular movements around your clit. "Such a beautiful body," he inserted a finger inside you, making you whine softly, "such a beautiful voice," your wetness was starting to stick to his hand. "And it's all mine."
With his other hand, he shifted the short sleeve of your dress, exposing more of your shoulder and placing soft pecks on it. His lips caressed your skin, and his fangs grazed it as he added a second finger.
He was curving his fingers in a sublime way, the strokes combining perfectly with the undulations he was making and hitting the perfect spot.
He kissed the skin of your shoulder, sucking it until it left a bluish mark.
"All mine," he repeated in a murmur as he ran his tongue over the mark he'd just made.
Your moans multiplied, breath hitching, bringing you closer and closer to orgasm, the hot cloud in your lower belly and back spreading.
"Come nena, let me see your pretty face when you do," he said, kissing you a little before pulling back and watching you with his drunken eyes.
You came, your legs all wobbly as Miguel's hand came to rest on your back to keep you upright. He kissed your temple and forehead, calming you gently.
"You're a dream," he said, covering the mark he'd left on your skin with your sleeve as you trembled, only he was aware of the hold he had over you.
Needless to say, from that day on in the summer, the air-conditioning became suspiciously faulty, because he had every intention of seeing you wearing that dress again.
#madschiavelique ⟢ ݁ ˖‧˚₊ ☁︎#mads' requests ⟢ ݁ ˖‧˚₊ ☁︎#miguel o’hara x reader#miguel o'hara x you#miguel o'hara x y/n#miguel o'hara x fem!reader#miguel o'hara smut#miguel o'hara#miguel o'hara one shot#miguel o'hara across the spiderverse#miguel ohara#miguel ohara x reader#miguel x reader#miguel x you#miguel x y/n#atsv miguel#atsv x reader#atsv smut#miguel spiderman#miguel atsv#miguel spiderverse
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Malleus: Marry me!
Noble!Yuu: I will not.
Malleus: My love please. If it's not you then I'd love no one else.
Noble!Yuu: Tragic. How tragic. Don't you understand how impossible it is for us.
Malleus: I don't understand. You love me and I love you.
Noble!Yuu: I'm not naive my dear. I'm not some young sycophant who knows nothing of the world I would be walking into and more than that I have my own responsibilities. Do you think your people will accept a human as their ruler?
Malleus: I can make them. Given time they will accept you.
Noble!Yuu: You can not. You can't make them do anything just because you are king. No matter how powerful you are you can't control anyone. You'd be a tyrant thinking like that.
Malleus: I will protect you!
Noble!Yuu: And be a powerless consort who must rely on you to do everything for me. How humiliating would it be to be ignored and shut away in my own castle? How depressing to only have you to lean on and have no confidence in myself. I was raised better than that and educated for better.
Malleus: You'd be safe. Wouldn't you be happy with me?
Noble!Yuu: I would at first. I'd feel aflutter at the thought of always having you to make things better and not having to worry about petty trifles like money like some peasant. But then I'd be left alone as you govern your nation that I am foreign too. I'd grow to resent you as I feel impotent to change anything other than the decor of my room and even then the traditional fea lifestyle will likely prevent it. I'd never be your equal.
Malleus: You wouldn't be just my consort. My people will understand once we are married, they know how dragons are. They won't have a choice but to love you.
Noble!Yuu: Wishful thinking. Fea are slow to change and they have not moved on from their hate of humans. What can I expect but poison in my cup or protests against us? Not to mention the fate of any children we have. What will they think of a half-fea heir?
Malleus: ....
Noble: Sure a few half-fea here and there isn't much but as their ruler? A child of tainted blood who will only live as long as a human. A magicless human's child at that. In a world where power matters? Blasphemy. You don't think they wouldn't usurp you for that alone long before a child is born? Tell me my love do you think that we will have a fairy tale ending and happily ever after?
Malleus: I don't understand where this is coming from. Why can't we do what will make us happy? Forget about all these silly what-ifs and treasure each other.
Noble!Yuu: We are not at liberty to do such things. We were born in a position of power and trusted to use it for others, not ourselves. Of course, I want us to be happy and to be together. But I can't ignore our differences for the sake of love. Love today could be a tragedy tomorrow. I will not live for long, less than 10 years from your perspective. Can you stop time? Can you prevent death? Will you lose yourself to grief after I'm gone? Do you not think I will not suffer the older I get knowing how much I will hurt you when I pass? Do you think all of this only effects you?
Malleus: Yuu stop! Stop...I can't. Please don't ask anymore. You've clearly thought a lot about this, more than me. I've been short-sighted. But if I could find a way to fix these problems then you would be mine.
Noble!Yuu: Without hesitation.
Malleus: Even if you would cease to be human?
Noble!Yuu: As long as I'm not a monster or four-legged beast then yes.
Malleus: Would you become as fea?
Noble!Yuu: ...yes. I wouldn't take it lightly but yes. Is there even such a thing that could happen?
Malleus: I'll make it possible. For you.
(I think as a Fandom we should acknowledge that being with Malleus would be no cakewalk. There are many problems with it but that doesn't mean we should forget about the bad parts. We all like to fantasize but we should realize that Malleus is complex and so is love. Hardships make stories good and trials make love stronger. I will never understand why some prefer ooc content where everything happens according to what they want with no conflict. How boring and unearned. I love you enough to hurt you so that you can be fulfilled.)
#noble!yuu#twisted wonderland#twisted wonderland x reader#twisted wonderland incorrect quotes#mallyuu#malleus hcs#malleus x reader#twisted wonderland malleus#malleus draconia#malleus draconia x yuu#malleus draconia x reader
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Venus in the 8th House 🕯️🖤
🕷️There may be a "familial curse" regarding the female lineage that needs to be broken. The mom's side of the family may be very female dominated but the women might be very troubled or suffer from abusive/controlling relationships
🕷️When you have this placement, please know the difference between "obsession" and genuine love. Venus in the 8th can draw very intense admiration or fixation from others. But, if you mistake that for love, you can attract some really toxic or destructive people.
Inevitably, with this placement, even the ones who truly love you will be highly fixated on you. But, it won't be only out of lust or a need to possess or control you
🕷️ The best way for you to know and build your self-worth in love is to avoid obsessing over your person. YOU also have to know the difference between obsessing over someone and actually loving them. If not, you can either attract emotionally/physically unavailable people who keep you in that state of longing or love interests who are very low-vibrational. Either way, this won't build your self-esteem.
This is to not say that you should become a self-obsessed person. Just put plenty of energy into yourself. Pour into yourself and only accept love from those who can pour into you, too, especially if you're a more feminine person. Because you have a tremendous amount of love to give and need someone to match that.
🕷️The more Venus in the 8th House people hold their incredible affection back for those who are willing to really show up for them and respect them, the more magnetic and irresistible they become.
The 8th House represents our power. With Venus in the 8th, you are very powerfully attractive, in many senses of the word. Your energy itself is super-attractive. But, when you are desperate or settling for disrespect/dissatisfaction/no-effort partners, you are not standing in your power.
🕷️Okay, so let's talk about the sex appeal of this placement because, yes, it is talked about all the time for a reason. But it's also very misunderstood. While Venus in the 8th CAN easily be that very alluring siren, there's often a deep seated fear or discomfort around playing that role that needs to be worked through.
Don't forget that the 8th House is also about trauma, triggers, intense fears. Unfortunately, a lot of people with this placement either experience some kind of sexual abuse or assault when young or were just sexualized way too early by adults or older people around them, which can be quite traumatizing in itself. They may even endure some sort of shame-inducing scandal involving sex. So, a deep fear around one's attractiveness or a subconscious worry about being objectified or taken advantage of settles in. If you have this placement, instead of sexing up your appearance, you may actually cover up or even try to desexualize yourself to avoid such a thing. But, even then, when you're doing absolutely nothing, you still get sexualized
🕷️I think a lot about Venus in the 8th can speak to the dark side of the feminine experience. Being treated solely like a sexual object. Also, you may fear just being dismissed as pretty or written off as having no substance. You may try very hard to prove that you're not just pretty or some nice person who can just be pushed around. There may also be trauma surrounding that, as some 8th House Venus people have been conditioned to either people-please or suffer abuse
🕷️ Because of the possible aforementioned traumas, it can be highly empowering for those with this placement to EMBRACE their sex appeal. Not just for the sake of being sexy but to take that power back; to own their sexiness and heal their relationship with it.
(Of course, if you have been abused or assaulted, therapy and genuine self-work is key, too. Because it shouldn't be about seeking validation through being sexy. Remember that it's not the source of your self-worth)
🕷️ Embracing a more feminine role, in general, can also be very healing and empowering; to know that femininity is a form of power, not weakness. If you're into men, this can open up your receptive power in a way that makes you even more enticing. If you're into women, this will give you much greater respect for them
🕷️You are very naturally seductive, especially toward your preferred sex. It's not always in a sexual way, in your mind. It's more about your ability to deeply connect to people and draw them in. BUT, it can come across in a very sexual way to others, whether you intend for it to or not
🕷️ Unfortunately, it is very easy to attract toxic feminine energies into your life, with Venus in the 8th, particularly women who are very envious, controlling or untrustworthy. If you're a straight girl or queer guy, you may deal with a female "bestie" or two who is actually jealous, nasty, and manipulative. Who may secretly want to be you or feels threatened by you and is subtly trying to tear you down because of it. Or, if the friendship ends, she goes on a whole smear campaign to try and "destroy" you (which will probably fail anyway because you're a bad bitch).
I'm not saying be paranoid or don't trust people. But, please be very discerning about who you let close to you. Someone may claim to love you while secretly hating you.
🕷️On the flip side, when you're vibrating high and using discernment, you could attract women into your life who are wonderfully empowering, fiercely loyal and deeply loving. You just have to choose what kind of energy you want around you.
🕷️ Speaking of which, if you catch yourself displaying jealousy toward others or a need to cut others down, work on that! An envious, hating-ass Venus in the 8th House person is a sorry sight, particularly because it's so obviously coming from a place of poor self-esteem. Mind your business, stay in your lane, and encourage the empowerment of others. Because that's a reflection of your own self-love.
🕷️Beauty is your power but this is not solely external. Some Venus in the 8th people could become hyperfixated on their appearance to try and maintain their power. Others could go the opposite extreme and claim to not care at all about their looks because they're not "shallow". The key is balancing an awareness of both your inner and outer beauty. To know you're equally attractive inside and out and that you should put effort into both kinds of beauty.
🕷️ People can react to you in very extreme ways because of your attractiveness. A lot of times, this is just dramatic idealization or feeling very intimidated or unable to act "normal" around you because of your beauty. And yes, some may just be very envious or triggered by you. Oh, well. It's their problem!
🕷️At your most powerful, you'll be able to turn any sort of hate directed your way into fuel for your self-love and self-respect. Especially if anyone is trying to make you feel like you're not good enough or attractive enough. No one can make you feel less than unless you allow them to.
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Tainted Love - JJK (M)
Hello hello everybody!
Here is Demon!Jk as promised~
Thank you to everyone who expressed excitement from the teaser! And a special thank you to my bb Ella (@oddinary4bts) for betaing this fic for me and listening to me scream about Demon Jk on discord for the past month. Love you babes!
Alright, fasten your seatbelts, I went a lil AWOL with this but I hope you all enjoy regardless! Please let me know what you think~
Pairing: Jeon Jungkook X F!Reader
Rating: 18+ (Minors DNI)
Genre: Fantasy!AU, Demon!Jk, Witch!Reader, unrequited love, romance, smut, angst, lil fluffy bits in there too.
Warnings: Graphic depictions of violence, main character death (not permenant), Demon!Jk can be toxic, reader is in love and knows she shouldn't be, darker themes - Jungkook is an old demon and isn't a very happy one, they use each other a bit but they work that out. SMUT WARNINGS: Multiple smut scenes (you heard me), unprotected sex (don't be silly), oral (f and m receiving), creampies, rough sex, emotional sex, standing/wall fucking, Jungkook is pussy whipped confirmed, dirty talk (jungkook and reader freak nasty), switch!Jk and switch!reader, hair pulling, vaginal sex.
Words: 16.4k
Summary: Jungkook sometimes forgets the time. Except the time he's spent with you, he's certain those times he'll remember until the day he turns to dust. As a demon with a time limit on his life, will he let you in? The witch who has shown him tenderness instead of a blade at his throat. Does he trust you with his life? Or will you be too late?
Jungkook sometimes forgets the time.
And not in the sense of he can’t remember the time of day, or the day of the week itself. No, it’s gotten much worse over his millenia of life. He legitimately doesn’t remember if it’s the 1700s or 2020s some days. Time is a much more relative construct than most people believe. Life isn’t always linear. Things can happen backwards, things can happen too fast or not at all when someone has believed it to be otherwise.
Jungkook had forgotten the time again today. The smoke of his cigarette rose up above his head and swirled and flowed along with the fan spinning slowly above his head.
He laid on his bed in this dingy apartment that he pays for with money he conjures. Being a demon has its perks. But, to remain under the guise of a regular human, he works at a local mechanics shop.
He lives life as a typical low level human being. He has a backstory and everything. His parents passed away when he was little and his great aunt cared for him until he was old enough to move out on his own. While away she passed and he’s been alone ever since. This small village had accepted him, unfortunately for them.
Now, Jungkook was a demon, but that didn’t mean he was wasteful. Nor was he ruthless and bloodthirsty. No, he was nothing of the sort. He was far too old for childish nonsense like that. His temper had almost fizzled out with the will to change his fate for the better. At this point? He’d rather disappear and be done with it all. Constantly looking for new souls to take, it had been exhausting in the beginning, and now? Now he didn’t care really one way or the other.
He had one year before it all went away.
One year before he dies.
The reason? Jungkook had betrayed his brethren. His fellow demons sentenced him to a life on Earth until he could fulfill a quota of ten thousand souls. Specifically, ten thousand souls of those who are the victims of the painful fate of unrequited love. As that was his crime.
He loved a human woman, and so? He was forced to kill the poor saps that had fallen into his own trap.
A painful irony, but Jungkook had quit feeling pain a long while ago. Five thousand years to complete his task, to take ten thousand souls that were suffering the same pain as himself all those years ago. And finally, after far too many years, his task would be ending. And him along with it all.
He couldn’t find it in himself to care much about himself. He was far too tired.
There was, however, one Earthly pleasure that he’d found himself enjoying.
You.
A witch in your own right, a member of the coven in the area. You’d moved in a few years back and noticed Jungkook immediately. He was handsome, he was dark and mysterious. How were you supposed to resist?
Jungkook initially hadn’t taken that much of a liking to you. But you were persistent and perhaps even a little desperate for a friend that knew at least some of your true identity. Jungkook had finally relented on his reluctance and had let you in. Not much, there were things you were certain he would never tell you. Perhaps some things you wouldn’t want to know in the first place. But, it didn’t take long for you two to start fucking after that.
He was weak for very few things. However, cheap spicy ramen from the convenience store down the street, cigarettes and sex had proven to be nicely distracting.
You were pretty and nice enough, although Jungkook didn’t particularly care for you at first, once you two fucked a few times he could see himself forgiving your little nuisances. They didn’t really matter on the large scale anyways.
Nothing did, actually.
A knock at the door brought him from his stupor. He didn’t have to work today, he’d be pissed if Hoseok came to ask him to cover again. He’d already done it five times in the past month. He put out his cigarette and moved towards the entrance. With a scowl on his face he answered the door to see your frame standing in the doorway.
Jungkook raised a brow at you before looking down to see you dressed in your work uniform. You also had a regular job, but you worked as a bartender at the local joint in town. You took notice of his scowl and gave him a playful pout.
“Aw baby, you look so much cuter when you smile,” you said with a pat to his cheek. Jungkook rolled his eyes but let you in as he saw you carrying his favorite booze in your hand. You set the bottle on the table and went to take your shoes off when Jungkook saw a flash of your panties up your skirt.
It was Saturday. You and Jungkook usually fucked during the week as it worked best with both of your schedules. It was rare to see you on the weekends, as this was when the most tips came from the bar's patrons.
“It’s Saturday,” he said, eyes trailing back to your face.
You’d noticed his staring, but you didn’t care-this is usually what happened when he hadn’t seen you in a while.
“Does that mean we can’t fuck on a Saturday?” you asked, head tilting to the side.
Jungkook lit another cigarette. “Why aren’t you working?” he asked, taking a deep drag off the tobacco stick. You smiled at him and Jungkook sighed deeply.
You only smiled like that when you were up to no good.
“I’m trying to set Sana and Alex up,” you said with that same damned smile.
“Why the fuck do you want to do that?” he asked, tapping some of the ash off his vice into a glass.
“Because they love each other, they just need a push to figure it out for themselves. So I asked to take an earlier shift today because we had a date,” you said, walking closer. Jungkook watched the sway in your hips and felt the stirring in his lower stomach. He wouldn’t mind fucking you tonight. It was better than forgetting what time it was. Again. “Plus a few of my sisters from the coven are coming over tonight.”
Jungkook sighed, decidedly ignoring the mention of your coven. “A date, huh?”
You pouted and he smirked at your disappointment. “What? Can’t I say that’s what it is? Got something against dating me?”
He inhaled deeply. “Not particularly, but demons and witches don’t mesh well.”
A sharp jab to your heart, but Jungkook was great at those. Without realizing it, he broke your heart day after day. It was ridiculous honestly, you shouldn’t have fallen for him in the first place. Really, you shouldn’t have. You knew it was wrong. Jungkook wasn’t incorrect when he said witches and demons don’t get along well. Some witches had a strong moral code and demons could go against all of them without even a second glance.
Jungkook technically could get you kicked out of your coven.
But he was too enthralled with the fact you put out on the regular and you were too enthralled with him in general.
Overall, it wasn’t the best situation, but Jungkook had done you some favors in the past. Acquiring materials for your coven’s spells, summoning a few extra hundred dollars when you’re short on rent, and giving you an equally satisfying sex life.
Hopefully, tonight was going to prove no different.
“You seem to mesh just fine with me,” you said, voice teasing and obviously hinting.
His eyes flashed a deep crimson at the thought of being able to fuck you. He’d been wound up and needing something besides cigarettes recently. Your body would be a welcomed distraction.
“I do, don’t I?” he said, voice turning smoother.
Jungkook was an attentive lover, always making sure you came multiple times. As a demon he had good refraction period and was able to fuck you after cumming-sometimes multiple times a day. Especially if you hadn’t been able to come over often enough.
You hadn’t seen him in probably two weeks, you had to travel for a coven meeting. But it seems those two weeks left him needing you.
He crowded your space, hands winding around your body and squeezing your ass. He rested his head against your collarbone, hiding his face in your neck. Jungkook did this sometimes, almost as if he could shrink his world and thoughts down to just this moment. This space. This breath happening between the two of you.
You were about to ask if he was alright when he captured your lips in a hungry kiss. You responded, letting him back you up towards the wall. Your thighs clenched at the attention. Jungkook had to be the best sexual partner you’d ever had in your almost one hundred years of life. Being a witch had its perks as well.
He was desperate against your mouth, panting and eagerly licking in between your lips, parting them so he could tangle his tongue with yours. His hands wound up your lower back.
“Jungkook, baby,” you whined softly, as he swallowed your lips once more. “I gotta be quick today,” you frowned.
“That’s fine, I won’t last long anyways,” he said, already painfully hard in his jeans.
He turned you around, having your palms flat against the wall. “Think you can stand while I fuck you?” He asked, licking his lips at the sight of your ass presented nicely to him in your short skirt.
“Yes-I can,” you bit your lip, mind reeling with the fact you were about to have him again. You and Jungkook fucked fairly often, probably three times a month, sometimes more if he could swing it. And this had been your arrangement for almost a year now.
People at work knew Jungkook, he was a regular at the bar and people often referred to him as your boyfriend. In their minds you two were just young adults figuring out life and it would all work in the end. You two cared for each other-right?
“Hey,” Jungkook said, voice softer. “You there?”
Ah, you slipped into your thoughts again.
“I’m here, it’s fine-please,” you whimpered, looking over your shoulder at him, the burning in between your thighs causing you pain. Jungkook nodded before flipping your skirt up and tugging your panties down your legs. You were soaked, wetness pulling away with your panties that had Jungkook hissing between his teeth.
“Fuck, do I have time to eat you out? Just a bit? Fuck please,” he begged, kneeling behind you and kissing your ass hungrily. “Let me, I need it baby, please?”
You really did have to be quick, members of your coven were coming over tonight and you’d have to scrub yourself stupid in the shower to not smell like demon. But fuck-when he begged like that?
“Whatever you want,” you said, voice breathless at his eagerness.
He was so good at getting what he wanted. It always worked with you, and it always would unfortunately.
“Fuck yes,” he groaned, placing his mouth on you in needy kisses. Jungkook’s tongue threaded between your lips and found your clit almost immediately. You cried out and gripped the wall as he ate your pussy like a starved man.
He liked it.
He liked eating your pussy so much. Honestly, he wasn’t sure why. Perhaps it was the flavor, the amount of slick you produced for him, the way you rutted your hips back against him whenever he did it. You made the sweetest noises when he had his mouth on your cunt and now was proving no different. Jungkook almost felt high at the feeling of your wetness collecting on his face.
Maybe it was that part he was addicted to. Or maybe it was worse than that. In times like this, he really could forget. He could forget he was a demon, not many people willingly share this much of themselves with a demon and know the consequences. But as a witch, you knew what would happen if your coven found out. You knew and yet? You still let him in. You let him touch you and fuck you. All of it.
“Kook~” you cried out, head pressing against the wall. “Please, gonna cum,” you whimpered out.
Damn, he was hoping to get a little more than that. The next time you came over he was going to want to eat your pussy for hours.
“Then cum for me, baby, get yourself nice and wet for my cock,” he said.
You didn’t need much today, you were just as needy as he was. Probably more so. A few more heady sucks of his lips and you were cumming.
“Jungkook-fuck,” you gasped. He smirked and stood up, licking his lips as he undid his jeans. You panted harshly against the wall, mind whirling in pleasure.
“That’s it, pretty thing,” he cooed, approaching with his now crimson eyes. You knew he must be needing this if he’s so worked up already.
“Please baby, give me your cock?” you asked, reaching behind you to grab the front of his undone jeans. Jungkook followed easily when you tugged, your hand dipping underneath the fabric to grasp his cock. He sighed in pleasure, pushing his pants down further and head tilting back just a touch. He pushed his boxers down as well, freeing his cock entirely before you smiled back at him and taking him in your hand once more.
“Fuck, yes,” he said, voice turning raspy and dark.
You winked and pumped him a few times before lining him up with your dripping core. He hadn’t stretched you but you wanted the burn today. “Fuck me then,” you said, inviting him inside you once more.
Jungkook held your hip as he started to lead his cock between your lips. “You wet enough?” he asked, raising a brow at you.
Such a smug bastard. But his cock was big enough he needed to ask-because he didn’t want to hurt you. His demonic nature was there, but honestly hurting someone that had continuously done him favors didn’t seem that important.
“Y-Yeah,” you whimpered, rubbing against him. “Please put it in, want your thick cock in me so bad Jungkook!”
He nodded, finally pushing in just a touch. You whined, head falling back as you felt the full sensation begin. Jungkook growled out at your tightness gripping his cock just right, giving him the rush of tingles down his spine. He gave gentle thrusts into your heat to ease you open, although you were really squeezing him today and his eyes rolled back in his head at the sensation of your sweet cunt letting him in inch by inch.
“Fuck I love your pussy,” he groaned, rolling his hips into yours fully.
“Love your cock,” you cried, walls clenching down on him harshly. Jungkook couldn’t stop his reaction of bucking into you roughly. You let out a sharp cry at his cock hitting deeper than usual.
“Sorry baby, m’sorry,” he murmured against your skin, kissing your neck and shoulder. Moments like that were the ones you remembered with pain in your chest. The way he easily apologized for the slightest harm to you. All except the harm to your heart.
You shook your head. “It’s okay, don’t worry-just, oh! G-give me more!”
He didn’t need to be told twice, holding your hips he started thrusting inside of you with firm pushes. He huffed in his own pleasure, watching your puffy pussy swallowing his cock with each rut forward. “Look so good like this, take my cock so well,” he sighed, the sweet sensations of your warm, wet walls sucking him in had shivers rocketing down his spine and pooling heat in his stomach.
“Cock so good, made to take it baby, love having you inside me like this,” you mewled. Jungkook smirked at your pleasure cries reaching his ears.
“Made to take me huh?” he asked, giving harsher thrusts inside of you and watching as your face morphed into shocked pleasure.
“J-Jungkook!” you sobbed out.
He was panting against your skin, thrusting inside you with eager pushes of his hips against your ass. The sound of skin slapping echoed through his apartment.
Jungkook could barely think at this point in sex. He was driven by your high pitched cries and the boiling need in his stomach. “Cum baby, cum all over my cock. Gonna let me cum inside today baby?” He teased, huffing sex driven laughter across your throat while he bit down.
“Mmm~ah! Y-Yeah, it’s fine, I have the potion for it,” you cried, grabbing his hand that was gripping one of your hips. He wound the other around your front to start playing with your clit to get you there faster.
“Then I’m gonna fill you up baby, feel it dripping inside of you huh? Wanna cum baby, fuck I really want it, say I can have it,” he groaned.
He loved hearing you beg for his cum. It did something to him, made his high that much sweeter because you pleaded for it. You wanted him that badly. There was something hot about having your watery eyes beg with his to finally let you cum.
“You can, you always can baby,” you promised, holding his wrist while he pounded inside you brutally.
Jungkook smiled against your skin before husking permission to cum against your jaw. With a deep gasp you came, Jungkook following not too shortly after. Your pussy milking him with each pulse of your afterglow.
“Thank you-fuck, oh baby,” you shivered against him, leaning into the kisses he trailed along your shoulder.
“Fuck give me a second, I came so hard,” he said, slumping against you while he pressed you against the wall with him still inside of you. But soon enough you felt him soften and with a deep sigh he pulled from you.
You shivered as his cum trickled down your thigh.
“Ah shit, sorry baby,” he said, running to grab a few tissues. You panted softly against the wall, keeping yourself steady so as not to make a mess. He came back and helped you clean up a bit and offered you his shower.
“Can’t, got sisters coming over tonight, if I shower here they’ll smell demon on me from a mile away,” you stated. “But thanks,” you said with a smile.
He nodded, sitting at his tiny coffee table smoking a cigarette.
Jokingly, you teased him. “Those’ll kill you one day,” you said, pulling on your shoes.
Jungkook’s face didn’t smile like you were hoping. Although it rarely did, you felt the difference. He was… upset?
“No, I’ll be dead by next year regardless,” he whispered.
The room went eerily quiet. Your heart was hammering in your chest. What did he mean he would be dead by next year?
“What the fuck does that mean?” You said, walking towards him in concern. “The fuck do you mean you’ll be dead by next year?”
Jungkook wasn’t phased by your anger. You hardly knew his story and he preferred to keep it that way. Because he knew this would be your reaction. And he hated fighting with you. It never made any difference.
“Didn’t you find a demon, on its own-no contracts or groups or general mayhem happening-a little odd?” He asked, putting out his cigarette.
You swallowed thickly. It was odd. But you weren’t going to argue with a good thing and, perhaps you’d hoped that there was maybe just a happy coincidence, for once.
Of course you were wrong.
Naïveté hadn’t served you well in the past and it seemed to stomp your heart once again in this long life of yours…
“I never found you odd, Jungkook,” you said.
“You should’ve.”
Your heart was racing making your next words slightly frantic. “What’s wrong with you, huh? What’s going on? Are you finally gonna tell me?”
He sighed deeply. He hated the sound of your voice right now. You sounded like you were going to cry, and he didn’t want to make you upset. Watching you cry was painful.
“I have a quota of souls to collect. If I don’t collect all of them by the time set-I disappear,” he said. “The souls of those who know unrequited love.”
Your throat felt dry at his statement. What could you say to that? Was there anything to be said? It’s not like you two were dating, it’s also not like you ever could with you being in the coven.
“How many souls do you have left?” You asked, voice sad.
“Ten,” he breathed.
Ten. Ten souls before next year didn’t seem crazily difficult. But the specificity did complicate things.
You nodded. “Okay, I’ll help you,” you said.
Jungkook’s head snapped to you, and he stood quickly. “Don’t fucking say that,” he said, voice shaking with anger.
“But why not? Why can’t I help you? I have the ability to find souls like that, we can travel and you can collect.” You explained.
“We?” He asked, raising a brow. “You really think I trust you enough to let you do that? How do I know you wouldn’t take me right to that coven of yours?”
You felt your heart break. “Is that what you think I would do?” You said, voice sad and in disbelief. Jungkook knew it was a low blow, but he had to get you to leave if this is where this conversation was going.
He didn’t like hurting you, or your feelings. It usually wasn’t necessary but sometimes you dug too deep, and he had to back you off somehow.
“The fuck is your problem you asshole,” you sniffled, wiping your eyes. “All I did was ask to help you, is it so wrong that I actually want you around? That I actually like hanging out with your crabby ass… call me when you’re not being a massive dickhead” you said, grabbing your bag but intentionally leaving the booze. All it would do was make you think of him anyway. Jungkook was about to call out your name but you slammed the door right in the middle of his sentence.
“Fuck…”
He knew that wasn’t fair, he knew that he shouldn’t have snapped at you like that but… sometimes you did get too close. Jungkook knew what his end would be, and there wasn’t anything you or he could do about it.
At least, nothing he wanted to do about it…
—
You hadn’t spoken to Jungkook in a week or two now. He hadn’t reached out and you weren’t particularly interested in fighting with him again, not right now. He really did hurt your feelings… He could trust you, you wondered briefly what it would take for him to listen. To hear that you wanted him to collect those souls.
You were just as damned as he was, you knew that. Even more so if your coven discovered what you were up to in your bedroom. And heart…
Just as you were about to suck it up and call him, your phone rang. It was a number you didn’t immediately recognize, but the area code was local.
“Hello?” You answered.
“Hey, Y/N?” Hoseok’s voice echoed through the phone. Hoseok was a fellow mechanic at the shop Jungkook worked at.
But what would he be calling for?
“Yeah? What’s up Hoseok?” You asked.
“Um… Jungkook, he collapsed at work, he might need to go to the doctor but we’re slammed. You’re his emergency contact so I’m calling you to let you know what’s going on?” His voice sounded worried and confused. Jungkook never got sick, he was a demon, but they didn’t know that. They just knew he was a healthy young guy.
But this was odd.
“I’ll be right there,” you said, hanging up and grabbing your keys.
The drive through town was relatively quiet, but when you got to the shop you could see that there were several people waiting for their usual tune ups and repair work.
You walked in and Ashley, the receptionist, smiled at you. “Hey Y/N, thanks for coming. Jungkook’s in the office with Namjoon,” she said softly.
With a nod you headed back towards the office. You heard Namjoon speaking to Jungkook, but it seemed like he was either not responsive or just choosing to ignore him. The latter seemed more probable. Namjoon was the head mechanic at the shop and ran it for his friend Chen who owned a couple different car places throughout the area.
You opened the door and Jungkook’s head turned towards you. “Baby,” he called. You tried to keep the smirk off your face but you crossed your arms and leaned back against the door.
“Oh, so now I’m your baby?” You said, running your tongue along your teeth with an unimpressed look on your face. Jungkook sighed heavily, knowing that you were going to be pissed with him, he was lucky you came at all. Especially after how he treated you the last time you two saw each other.
Namjoon sighed, used to the bickering and sour looks shared between the two of you here and there. “I don’t know what caused it Y/N, but he seems pretty sick. He might need to go to the doctor.”
Jungkook was about to protest when you nodded. “I’ll take him,” you said. His eyes flashed red in annoyance but it was brief.
“Chen’s already given him the rest of today and tomorrow off,” Namjoon said. “So hopefully that’ll give him some time to recoup, but if he needs more just have him give us a call.”
You nodded, reaching for Jungkook’s hand. He took it, sitting up slowly. You read his energy and found yourself immediately concerned. He seemed to notice your worry and sighed deeply before standing and leaning against you. Without much more ceremony you ledhim to your car.
Neither of you said much as you got him in and started off towards his place. You would have to do an energy transfer for him tonight, luckily it would just take a few potions or a spell to replenish his energy, sex worked as well but ultimately the cause had you concerned.
His human body was starting to deteriorate.
When you arrived you grabbed him and helped get him inside his house.
He was panting softly and laid back on his bed in a huff.
“You need energy,” you whispered, leaning forward to give him some of yours to ease some of his pain. Jungkook turned his head to keep your lips from connecting in the way he needed. “You’re being a shit, either let me help you or delete my number.”
Jungkook frowned, swallowing hard before turning his head so your lips could connect. He breathed deeply in relief as your energy flowed through him softly. Your energy had always been soothing to him, but right now it seemed to help immensely.
He’d missed you.
When you moved to pull away he grabbed you by the back of your neck and connected your lips again. You kissed him with a gentleness that he wasn’t used to, your lips gliding over his softly and with a warmth that was addictive.
He loved your bites and eager kisses but this… This had things stirring in his stomach that frightened him.
Jungkook was afraid of very few things. But your genuine care for him scared him most of all. Because he knew he didn’t deserve it. Jungkook wasold and angry and yet, more exhausted than anything.
You wrapped your arms around his neck and settled in his lap. Kissing him a bit more to relax him. The energy would settle soon enough and he would at least be able to tell you what happened.
“Baby,” he called, voice raspy and tired.
“Yes, Kook, what’s wrong?” You cooed, running your hands through his hair to ease him into accepting your energy. The more he fought it the less it would work. “Relax baby, I can’t help if you don’t let me.”
He nodded, head dropping into your neck as he simply tried to feel you. It had been a long time since he’d needed a transfer from you but each time he always forgot how easy you made it.
“Good job, sweet boy,” you praised, kissing his cheek and temple.
Jungkook sighed heavily against your skin, placing tender kisses there as well. “Can I have more energy baby… please?”
You smirked. “Do you want the potions? I know they taste bad but they work, or we can do a direct transfer through sex-”
“Yes,” he said quickly.
You chuckled softly before nodding. “That’s fine then, lay back baby,” you said, undoing his belt and getting his pants unbuttoned.
“Fuck,” he sighed, head tipping back in bliss as you touched him. He felt encompassed by you and your soothing energy.
Your hand slipped in his pants and squeezed his cock gently to encourage him to harden. Your kisses on his jaw and neck stayed sweet but they were firmer, something told you he needed to be babied today. And even though it was rare, you adored it every time. You pushed his pants down further so they wouldn’t be in your way, sending him a look as you spat on his cock. You wrapped your hand around the shaft and pumped slowly, watching the pleasure write across his features.
“F-Fuck, yeah-ah,” he whimpered, eyes shut and brow furrowed in ecstasy.
“Getting so hard so fast, gonna feel so good in my pussy baby,” you cooed, taking his hand and leading it under your skirt.
Jungkook’s eyes practically sparkled at the fact you were so wet. “Soaked-you’re soaked angel,” he moaned, touching your core carefully.
You hiccuped a soft sigh of pleasure before leaning down and taking his cock in your mouth. Jungkook’s breathing stammered at your hot and wet throat swallowing his cock.
You’d always done it so well, and Jungkook could say he would die happily if you were sucking his dick. “F-Fuck, angel, please-mmm,” he groaned, his other hand gently caressing the back of your head. “Sweet tongue, feels so fucking good.
You swirled your tongue around the head of his cock before eagerly swallowing it again. Jungkook’s submissive whines had you clenching your thighs together as his fingers snuck inside your panties.
“O-Open your legs-please, wanna touch your pussy, need to feel you,” he whimpered.
Without much ceremony you did as he asked, opening your legs to let him touch you. Jungkook moaned at the feeling of your slick heat against his fingers, he plunged two inside of you causing your throat to tighten around his cock, giving him a rush of heady pleasure down his spine. He could feel you everywhere. Your energy coursing through him, your hot mouth on his dick and your juicy pussy dripping down his fingers. He was quickly getting overwhelmed in the best way. He wanted more of you, more and more until there was nothing left to give. He wanted to give you more too.
He desperately wished he could sometimes.
“Koo~” you moaned on his cock, rutting your hips gently to remind him you were currently soaking his hand and needed some stimulation or you were going to lose your mind.
“Yeah angel baby, soaking pussy feels so good...”
You whimpered on his cock, using the vibrations to pleasure him that much more. But his fingers were working so much slick from your core you knew you needed to have him inside or you were going to go insane. He cried out when you pulled away, eyes wide with need. You kissed him then, giving him a touch more energy to help ease his frantic breathing. He shivered when you climbed on top of him, your warmth and wetness seemingly everywhere.
“Ready baby? Want me to put you in?” you asked, tugging your panties off and slipping your skirt down and off of your legs.
Jungkook nodded quickly. “Please, please baby let me feel you,” he said, reaching for you as you crawled back into his bed. You smiled and rubbed yourself against his cock teasingly for a moment before Jungkook looked about ready to cry.
“Alright sweetie, I’ll stop teasing now, take what you need,” you said, easing yourself down on him. Jungkook’s hands settled at your hips, huffing out desperate breaths of pleasure as your tight heat swallowed his sensitive cock.
“Yes! Yes fuck, feels so fucking good angel, oh baby,” he cried, sounding wrecked already.
You had a feeling you would be doing most of the work today, so you started gingerly bouncing on his cock. Jungkook’s eyes were sparkling, turning a soft purple color as your magic intertwined with him. You had been training for years to have this level of mana and Jungkook knew he’d only scratched the surface of your abilities on days like this.
Sometimes he wondered how strong you really were. You handled him like you weren’t afraid of him or his powers. Albeit his strength was significantly less than it was back in hell.
Even then though, he was curious.
“Fuck~ Jungkook!” you whined, grinding your clit on his lower stomach. “Please, please baby, wanna make you cum,” you pleaded. “Cum inside me baby, please? Give me your cum and I’ll take it like such a good girl. Your good girl Kook,” you said, reaching down to play with yourself.
Jungkook groaned in pleasure. “So close baby, so close-ah fuck!” he gritted out through his teeth.
“Gonna fill me up? Please give it to me, Jungkook. Wanna have your cum so deep inside.”
He couldn’t hold it back anymore, Jungkook sat up and pulled you close as he rutted deeply in your pussy for a few quick thrusts before he shivered in release. You felt your core pulsing at his whimpers and whines from the pleasure your body gave him. His head was flush against your chest as he panted.
You smiled, running your fingers through his hair to soothe him. Your energy was mellowing nicely with his giving him more color in his face that eased your own heart. “Kook,” you said softly. “D’you feel okay?” you asked, hips and thighs burning from the effort to fuck him, but the pleased look on his face made everything worth it in your mind.
“You didn’t cum,” he said, reaching down to touch your sensitive clit. He was still decently hard inside of you, but you knew he didn’t have long. “Wanna make you cum angel,” he said, rolling his hips up into your gingerly.
“Mmm, baby,” you called in a pitched tone. “Won’t take much, I’m so close,” you hiccuped, resting your head on his shoulder.
Jungkook grunted, his cock was sensitive but your sweet moans kept him up long enough to feel that tight squeeze from your pussy and the rush of slick that soaked his cock in response. “Fuck, yes, yes give it to me,” he begged.
You wrapped your arms around his neck and kissed him sweetly. You scanned his energy quickly and felt relieved to know it was almost back to normal. “Thank you baby,” you said, patting his cheek with a dizzying smile.
“It’s not as good if you don’t cum, love feeling you squeeze me,” he sighed in bliss, your warmth still holding his cock nicely.
Sometimes he liked this. He liked just feeling your body against his, his cock inside you for a few moments after you both came. You got wetter and slicker and your walls felt so nice on his cock he thought it would make him cum again some days.
You smoothed your hands down his back, holding him close as your energy finally settled and his eyes changed back to their regular brown color.
With wobbly knees you got up and headed towards his bathroom.
Jungkook laid on his back and stared at the ceiling. He wanted a cigarette but he’d run out the night before.
You came back and stood before him. Jungkook could see up your skirt and he was trying not to focus on that as you stood there with a waiting expression.
He inhaled deeply. “I know you read my energy. You know what’s happening to me,” he said.
“I want to hear you say it to me,” you stated.
Jungkook nodded, agreeing with your demands of honesty. Finally.
“Not all demons are without humanity. Some have more than others, yet I always seemed to stray towards more rather than less… there was a woman, I slowly found things I liked about her. Then things I enjoyed… then things I found myself smiling about on my own. I was endeared to this woman… I loved her in a sense,” he said, staring at the ceiling.
“And yet, it wasn’t enough,” he breathed. “My fellow knights laughed at me, then berated me for genuinely showing care towards a human. As one of the high knights of hell I was expected to have higher standards than disgusting humans. So they bound me in a human body, locking most of my powers away, so I would no longer be able to communicate with the human I once cared for. And then I was given the quota I told you about… and five thousand years to make it happen. If I didn’t collect a thousand souls then I cease to exist, it’s starting. My timer is running out.”
You swallowed thickly. “How do I help you stop it? How do I help you?”
Jungkook gave you a tired smile. “Baby, I don’t want to ask that of you. I’m so old now, this life doesn’t matter to me anymore.”
You felt a few tears well up in your eyes despite yourself. “It fucking matters to me…” you whimpered. “You matter to me.”
Jungkook was stunned. “Y/N,” he said, reaching for you.
You sat on the bed next to him. “I don’t want you to disappear. What will happen if you collect all one thousand souls?”
“I will be reinstated in Hell,” he murmured. “I won’t disappear and I will be back to full strength once more.”
You swallowed hard, nodding your head. Either way you’d lose him, but at least one way he’d still be alive… “Then let me help you, I don’t want to see you die like this.”
Jungkook sighed deeply. He’d never had many friends. He had people he kept around for convenience, but overall he’d kept to himself throughout the years. You were the only one in recent history that he’d told anything to. Perhaps he could truly do this. He could be reborn in hell once more.
And when he got back to hell… he could rip those knights apart for what they put him through…
He nodded. “I’ll need your help,” he said.
“You have it,” the words fell easily from your lips. “I won’t let you die like this.”
“Then I won’t.”
—
Jungkook hadn’t expected you to take this so seriously. And yet, here you were in his apartment. You had your glasses on and were gazing at your spellbook as a potion boiled on the stove. Jungkook alway thought you used a cauldron.
‘You think my tiny ass apartment could fit a cauldron?!’ You’d cried in annoyance at his teasing.
So here it bubbled and boiled and no doubt would cause trouble for Jungkook when he would ultimately have to clean it later.
“Baby,” he called, moving closer to you with your cup of coffee.
You’d stayed the night last night-Jungkook may have fucked you stupid enough he was worried about you driving. There weren’t any sisters of the coven stopping by soon so you could spend the night wrapped in his sheets. And you did exactly that.
You had ten months and twelve days to complete the task Jungkook had been given.
Ten more souls in ten months.
You’d already gotten a list together of possible cities you could look into. Once you had your potion perfected, Jungkook could go out and find his prey with minimal difficulty.
You took the cup from him, setting your spellbook aside as he sat across from you on the couch. You sighed and removed your glasses, rubbing your sleepy features before taking a sip of the hot coffee.
Jungkook watched you and gave your knee a squeeze. “Don’t use up too much energy baby. I’ve got ten months,” he said.
“Ten months isn’t a long time for a witch, nor is it for a demon, we need to work quickly before your condition progresses,” you said, drinking more of your coffee.
Jungkook crawled forward, taking your coffee from you which caused a pout to befall your features. He set your coffee down and crawled on top of you, laying his head right under your chest. He’d crawled between your thighs and was lying entirely over you.
“Need more energy?” You asked, running your fingers through his hair.
“No, I’m fine,” he said, resting against you.
You chuckled before resting back, hand still playing with the hair on his head. Recently, Jungkook had been craving these more than his cigarettes. Simple touches, soft kisses and conversations. Jungkook had never felt so at ease before. Even in his life as a knight of hell.
Jungkook rested heavily against your stomach, laying in between your legs. You knew this could be a side effect of your energy transfer-but it had been a while since he’d needed one. Usually the clinging from your energy would dissipate in a day or two.
It had been at least a week at this point. So what made Jungkook so snuggly? You didn’t want to complain about a sweet thing however.
Jungkook leaned into you more, curling around you as you kept rubbing his scalp. He seemed happy to just stay like this for a while. And you wondered what was causing such a change in him. Was this what he was like with those he trusted?
Sweet and softer?
Or was this purely for you-
No.
You couldn’t think that way, not about Jungkook. Either way this ended with him leaving you… you had to keep focused, you were doing this for your friend.
Your truest friend.
Jungkook snoozed on your belly, content to laze about while you did the hard work. But your heart broke a little more that day.
As you slowly started to fall for a man without a soul.
--
You’d been stressed today.
Jungkook could tell that you were just by the cute frown on your face, it seemed to have a permanent place on your pretty features today. It always appeared when you were frustrated or angry. He’d seen it directed at him several times, but right now it was at the potion you were working on.
There was a new ingredient you were sampling in it or something to that effect, Jungkook didn’t really understand much of what you were doing to be honest. But it was clear you were stumped for now. It was almost two o’clock in the morning.
“Y/N...” he trailed off, approaching as you sighed deeply.
Jungkook rarely said your name, so to hear it come out you knew whatever he said next he either was serious.
“Time to take a break,” he whispered, standing behind you in his kitchen. There were bags of ingredients all over the kitchen and it would no doubt be left there until later when you two woke up. You’d been staying at his place more and more lately and he couldn’t find it in himself to complain. He had access to your sweet lips and body daily, but it seemed rare that he wanted sex recently. Not that he wasn’t attracted or he was disinterested, it was merely there were other things about you that he was finding more and more interesting. Sex would always be one of his favorite activities with you, but right now he felt that he was learning new things about you everyday. It had him excited in ways he hadn’t been in centuries.
It also had him concerned.
Jungkook was a demon, he shouldn’t be having feelings like this. It almost shouldn’t be possible. It was not in his design to care much about people or have interest in them other than striking deals and killing them to collect their souls.
But Jungkook pushed all of those worries and thoughts to the back of his head.
Because your frown had appeared again, and that sweet pout he wanted to kiss.
“I’ve almost got it,” you said, voice soft and sleepy.
“I’m sure you do baby, but you’re tired and you won’t work well when you’re falling asleep,” he said, kissing your shoulder. “Come to bed...”
You leaned back heavily against him, looking up at his face while you sighed. With a tired smile you patted his cheek.
“I don’t want to give up for the night yet, you go to bed, I’ll join you in a bit...”
Jungkook wasn’t going to take that for his answer. So he turned the burner on his stove off and lifted you into his arms deftly. You didn’t have it in you to fight him, you expected this result anyways.
He laid you in bed and crawled in next to you. He pulled you into his embrace and sighed heavily as you snuggled in. He wrapped you up in his arms and you looked at his expression and gave him a smile. A real one. In reward he returned it, kissing your lips before laying back on the pillow.
“Sleep baby, we can try again in the morning.”
His words soothed something inside of you, the desperate thirst to have this potion done so you didn’t waste any more precious time.
You could waste a little time though, right?
Here in his arms you thought you could waste a lot more time than you had...
—
A weekend trip to the city was easy to conceal from your coworkers and sisters. You claimed you wanted a weekend away from coven activities-which was a bold-faced lie as you would be using magic in public which was almost exclusively forbidden. And doing it to help a demon.
Needless to say you hoped no one in your coven ever found out about this.
Jungkook grabbed his bag and tossed it into the back of his car as he got your stuff in too. “Got my keys baby?”
You tossed them across his car and he caught them, moving into the drivers side and opening your door for you. You climbed in and buckled up and shortly thereafter you were on the road.
You and Jungkook turned on a playlist and drove out of the town's limits and made it to the highway. Jungkook changed the playlist and you two settled in for a while.
After a bit, Jungkook reached over and grabbed your thigh, driving with one hand on the wheel. You looked down at his hand before gazing back at him.
“What?” You asked softly.
Ten months and three days. That’s how long you had left.
“Just wanted to.”
Your mouth curved into a shy smile before you placed your hand on his, afterwards your fingers intertwined in your lap.
Soon, you rolled into the city. Jungkook had gotten a decent hotel room for a few days for you two to have a home base. You’d find sections of the city where the next soul was and Jungkook could go out at night and collect.
His powers made it discrete however. Usually the attack was made to look like a natural cause. Rarely did it arouse suspicion. All by design.
When you two made it to your hotel room, Jungkook was quick to attach himself to you. He’d been less interested in solely gaining sex from you recently. However it had been a while since your last romp.
His lips found your neck as you tried to get your stuff out of your bag.
“Kook, what do you want?” You huffed as his hard length brushed against your ass. An aroused shiver rushed through you, sex being a little less frequent between the two of you had you more sensitive to his touch than usual.
“Wanna fuck baby, please?” He asked, rutting against your core softly.
You rolled back against him, unable to help yourself in this instant. His body felt so good and you were more than willing to have him between your legs.
“Yes, fuck me, Kook,” you breathed.
Jungkook didn’t waste much time, he hooked his fingers in your pants and pulled them down quickly. Your panties were damp and Jungkook purred at the sight. “You’re so wet baby,” he smiled, his hand dipping in your panties while he kissed your jaw.
You couldn’t help the soft juts of your hips into the cup of his pelvis, causing your ass to grind against his cock. “Fuck… Jungkook,” you whined, head rolling back on his chest. A soft chuckle escaped him at your needy tone.
“Yeah, m’gonna fuck you so hard baby,” he said. His fingers found your wet folds, sinking two inside your entrance shallowly, causing you to clench desperately.
You held his wrist, whimpering in need. “Please, please,” you panted. “Need something inside. Need you inside me, Kook.”
Jungkook kissed your jaw, a smile on his face. “Want my cock baby? Want it in that sweet little pussy?”
“Yeah~” you pleaded.
With a deep sigh Jungkook took his hand from inside your panties, tasting your slick and moaning.
“I need to eat your pussy first,” he said, turning you around and laying you on the bed. You laid back on the bed, peeling your legs open so that he could lay between them. Jungkook grabbed your panties and tossed them away. He breathed out in an eager pant. His eyes were locked on your core and then he looked at you.
“Wanna eat it baby?” you asked, smiling at his hungry eyes.
“Yeah,” he whined. “Let me have it, please baby let me eat your pretty pussy. Make you cum so nice,” he said, licking his lips.
Jungkook looked at your core, furrowed brows as he seemed as if he was almost in pain. “Please…”
You nodded. “Okay baby,” you said with a grin. “Take it then.”
He captured your lower lips in a hot kiss, moaning deeply as he licked between your folds to gather more of your sweetness that had him addicted. “Fuck… yes,” he groaned, moving to hold your thighs apart so he had better access to your dripping core.
“Kook!” You whined, head falling back on your shoulders as your fingers wound into his hair. “Fuck, fuck your mouth!” You cried.
Jungkook was eager to eat, it seemed that no matter how much time he spent between your legs it wouldn’t be enough. He’d always wish for one more minute, your sweet cunt on his mouth and your wetness gathering on his tongue had his cock pulsing in need. But he didn’t care about that, getting you soaking wet for his cock was all that was on his mind.
He took your clit between his pretty lips and started sucking harshly. He swirled his tongue around your sensitive bud before going back to suck again. You mewled in pleasure, thighs trembling at his heady touches. His middle and pointer fingers rubbed over your core before catching at your entrance. With a soft smirk he pushed his two fingers inside your hot walls.
“Jungkook!” you cried, grabbing his hair harshly. He just moaned in acknowledgment, happily slurping the wetness you leaked as he thrust his fingers in and out of your pussy slowly. His eyes shimmered at the sight of your slick coating his digits as it always did.
“I love your pussy so much, fuck,” he growled, lips and chin covered in you.
“So close, Jungkook,” you begged, the throbbing in your walls a clear sign of your oncoming orgasm.
He smirked again, before pulling away. You were about to cry for him to keep going when you heard him unbuckling his pants. With eager hands you moved forward to grab at him, pulling him closer as he chuckled at your neediness.
“Don’t laugh at me,” you scowled.
“Sorry baby,” he cooed, kissing your jaw. “Gonna make you squirt on my cock to make up for it huh?”
You felt the rush of his words tingle down your spine. He rarely didn’t mean what he said. And you were his good girl. If he wanted you to squirt on his cock then so be it.
You two quickly got worked up as Jungkook kissed you breathless and you tugged his pants down his thick thighs. He pulled his shirt off of his body and your eyes always widened. His tattoos were on full display and his toned body moving on top of you had stars forming in your eyes.
“You’re such a slut for a hot body,” he smirked, eyes dark and swirling with red undertones.
“I’m a slut for your hot body, yes,” you corrected. His eyes widened at your statement, but you were pumping his dick in your hand and he quickly felt his need for you taking over.
“Then let me put it in,” he sighed, naked now.
You were pulling your bra off when Jungkook leaned close. You looked at him in bewilderment for a moment before you smiled and wrapped your arms around his neck and pulled him in for a kiss.
There was this... sensation in Jungkook’s chest. Your bright eyes, teasing smile and sweet kiss encasing him and making him feel...
Lighter.
You laid back once you were naked as well and Jungkook moved eagerly to get in position. You giggled as he dragged you closer, adjusting you so his cock was now level with your pussy.
“Gonna put it in now baby,” he said, pushing just the tip of his cock inside before pulling out. You cried in impatience and Jungkook nodded, listening to both of your desires and pushing in further. Your fingers gripped the sheets of the bed and Jungkook rubbed your clit with his thumb to ease any tension from you so you could take him easily. He pulsed inside your cunt, a shiver of bliss running down his spine. It felt like electricity flowing through him. Your pussy was warm and snug around his cock and he could feel your wetness leaking down onto his balls already and he smiled.
“Jungkook! Please, please move,” you whined, eyes watery and pretty.
“Yes angel baby,” he agreed, thrusting inside of you with a steady pace.
The two of you moaned in appreciation of the other. Jungkook’s thick cock filled you in every way you wanted and needed, hitting all the right fucking spots. You’d never had another partner make you feel this way in the over one hundred years of your life. You clenched tightly and Jungkook swore he almost lost his fucking mind. He grabbed your thigh as he ground his pelvis against yours after every other thrust, holding himself up with the other hand. He was rewarded with your decadent cries.
“Fuck! Jungkook, fuck me baby, please, more-I need more,” you begged, grabbing his upper back and shoulders desperately.
Your wish was his command. He moved your thighs so your knees touched your ribs and started fucking you harder. The sound of your wet pussy swallowing him filled the room and he could hardly think. The only thing driving him was your cries and the pulsing in his lower stomach.
“Fucking wet pussy, yes-yes!” He sighed, his head tipping back for a moment as the pleasure of the moment overcame him.
“So big-so full!” you whimpered.
Jungkook smiled at your mewling cries, they coursed through his veins and made his chest tighten. Bringing you to this point was always so exhilarating. He loved pushing you to your limits and watching you shudder and gasp as he forced you to take it over and over again while the sparkle in your eye never faded. You wanted to take it, take him. You loved challenging him and bringing him to his knees just as often as he did to you.
“Yeah, take my big cock, snug little pussy takes my cock so well,” he growled, leaning down to kiss you with dark passion. He sucked on your lower lip before capturing your tongue in between his lips instead.
“Ahhh~” you whined, his hips pushing harder and harder against yours. He finally released your tongue and pulled you into another deep kiss before giving two more firm thrusts before looking at you, his eyes swirling with their beautiful red hue.
“Wanna fuck you from behind baby,” he purred, pulling from you and encouraging you to roll onto your belly. He spanked your ass, gripping the flesh between his fingers and watching you writhe in need for him.
“Please Kook,” you begged. “Put it back in...” you said, wiggling your hips to entice him. Jungkook spanked you again, causing you to gasp in pleasure.
“Wait for my cock you needy girl,” he said. “I’ll make it worth it,” he promised, leaning down to kiss your shoulder. You leaned your head to the side and reached up to cradle his neck. Jungkook trailed his hand down to your soaked pussy, throbbing with the need to cum. He slipped his fingers inside of you, reaching his other hand around your throat to tilt your head up. You watched him tower over you while his fingers plunged in and out of your sopping pussy.
Jungkook bit his lip while watching your eyes glaze over with the desire to cum. He loved bringing you to this point. Needy, eager and pleading for the pleasure he can deliver to you. “Sweet pussy baby, wanna cum? Wanna cum on my fingers?”
You couldn’t even form words with how good he felt. Your mouth was open as you panted your pleasure out in desperation.
“Or do you want my thick cock making you cream and squirt?” He teased, curling his fingers to hit that spot inside you that had stars swirling in your vision. “What does my angel want?”
“Kook, p-put your cock in, need it!” You rasped, feeling far too fucked out to handle anymore teasing.
Jungkook honestly couldn’t wait much longer either. His stomach felt tight with desire and he really needed to cum.
“Okay baby,” he cooed. Honestly, Jungkook was at his limit too. He couldn’t wait to feel the walls of your pussy wrapped around him while he plowed you into the bed and finished inside. Fuck, he wanted it so badly.
Finally he lined up with your entrance and pushed inside slowly. A soft cry came from your lips that Jungkook shushed, a lazy smile on his face. “Don’t cry at me baby, I’ll fuck you even harder for it.”
Little did Jungkook know, you wanted the rough treatment right now. You wanted more of it. He sighed in bliss when he bottomed out in your tight cunt, a deep seated pleasure boiling in his stomach. He couldn’t wait to feel you cream around his cock. You were flat on your belly, legs together but ass perched slightly up so Jungkook slid all the more easily.
“Yeah... just like that, good girl angel, that’s my good girl,” he said, starting to pick up pace rather quickly. You didn’t need him to be careful, you needed him to make you cum.
“Kook-Jungkook!” you cried, gripping the sheets between your fingers as he started pounding you just as he promised.
He couldn’t help the grin that fell over his features when he saw that ring of your cream forming at the base of his cock. “Fuck, fuck baby you look so good like this. Letting me fucking cream this pussy, ah~” he whined at your clenching walls sucking him in-begging in their own right for his cum.
“Please kook, so close, let me cum baby, please-I need it, need you Kook!” you cried. Jungkook’s hands found yours as he leveraged his hips so he could go even harder inside you.
“Gonna make me cum baby, make me cum fuck,” he huffed out, breaths coming in short pants. His brow was sweaty and the muscles in his thighs were trembling from the position he was fucking you in. But he didn’t care. Because your pussy was working him over and his balls were tensing as he waited for you to rut those cute little hips back.
Like clockwork you did as he expected, one of your tells you would be cumming soon. “Fuck, Jungkook! So close-so close!” you squealed, gripping his hands desperately as he was slamming into you. The wet squelching noises of your pussy were driving him up the wall and the view of your ass while he wreaked havoc on your body.
“M’gonna cum, angel, tell me where you want it,” he said, panting against your ear as he leaned over you.
“Inside baby, want all your cum inside me,” you whined.
He growled deeply, kissing your neck and biting down while he rutted inside harshly. “Take it then, cream my cock while I fill you up,” he said, another passionate snarl leaving his lips.
You answered with your own sweet mewls of pleasure, egging him on, whispering more naughty things to make him fuck you that much harder.
It didn’t take much longer before you both found yourselves thrown into orgasm. You first, walls squeezing him tightly, pulling him over the edge of bliss alongside you. He breathed hard against your shoulder, kissing along your skin to ease both of you through the intense sensations.
His cum started seeping past his softening cock and Jungkook finally found the ability to move once more. He wandered to the bathroom and got a few washcloths to clean the pair of you up with. Soft kisses were placed along the crown of your head, your cheeks and lips. “Such a good girl, angel baby,” he praised, more words of affection lain across your skin with his mouth.
Jungkook crawled into bed with you, pulling your frame close. “You alright?”
A soft chuckle escaped you, curling into him with practiced ease. “Yeah, m’good,” you said, eyes drooping slowly.
He smiled at you then, and you felt an odd pulse go through you.
The sooner you helped him, the faster he would slip from your grasp. These moments with him were fleeting, each time closer and closer to the last time you’d be entangled like this. Each kiss counting down in big red numbers. Your heart squeezed, and before you knew it, tears started to fall from your eyes.
Jungkook startled at the sudden change in emotion from you. “Hey, what’s wrong baby? Y/N?”
For a moment you really thought.
You really thought that you two could love each other...
--
Jungkook left your room late that evening. He kissed your head as you slept, curled up in the sheets naked. Jungkook almost didn’t want to leave you, he wanted to sleep as well-he wanted to hold your warm frame against him as he did.
These thoughts were starting to concern him. These were the very kinds of thoughts that had damned him to spend five thousand years on Earth. He wasn’t keen on suffering for another five thousand.
As a demon, Jungkook wasn’t sure if he should be able to feel these things. He was starting to care for you. He wanted to spend time with you, he wanted to be around you. But he knew that your time together was limited. Either he died or was sent back to hell, and either way you two would lose each other in the end.
It made him angry that this was your fate.
He didn’t want his time with you to be on a countdown. But the world is cruel by design and there was nothing Jungkook could do. You would ultimately be ripped from each other.
As he walked down the streets, Jungkook took your potion you’d made to help him navigate all the different souls at once. Jungkook wasn’t used to hunting like this anymore, it felt like decades since his last hunt. Perhaps it was, he wasn’t sure at this point. One thousand souls is a lot of people to collect from, and five thousand years is a long time to be on Earth. He was always forgetting the time before he met you.
Now, his time had never felt more limited.
Jungkook weaved through the people of the night, watching with keen eyes that were enhanced with your potion. Your potion also enhanced his other abilities, his strength and allure were heightened as well.
Everything would increase Jungkook’s likelihood of taking a few souls tonight.
He slid into a seat at a random dive bar, he charmed the bartender to give him a free drink as he walked through the people. There was a woman here, she was in her early thirties. Jungkook followed her, projecting a different face to lure her in.
Jungkook approached her cooly, speaking in soft tones and shy smiles to coax her into divulging her name. He handed her the drink and she blushed softly. The poor woman was in love with her boss, who was married. There was no way they’d ever get to be together. He always felt moderately bad for these people, but before he met you he thought they almost deserved it in a sense. That’s what they got for getting their hopes up. But now....
He led her outside into an alleyway where he seduced her just a bit more. Jungkook breathed her name out, capturing her lips in a kiss, and soon her soul was traveling from her to him, absorbing into Jungkook as he caught her, laying her down on the ground. It looked like she merely had a heart attack and fell over in the alleyway.
A sad ending for her.
Kerri Jesen...
Jungkook walked away from the scene, his old persona melting off and his regular human form, although the feeling of a soul coursing through him had his heart pounding in his chest. It was a rush, almost like getting high. His head was spinning and his mind was reeling, but he knew this was simply due to the fact he hadn’t been collecting souls as frequently.
Usually demons didn’t get this kind of rush.
Jungkook was wandering the streets towards the hotel when the distinct feeling of being watched fell over him.
He didn’t stop moving, but he knew it was a witch tracking him. His mind was still a little hazy from the collection but he knew that it wasn’t supposed to last much longer. He didn’t head back to the hotel yet. He didn’t want to lead an angry witch right to you if he had a choice.
Just as he was about to turn another corner, a blade was presented to his throat. Jungkook stopped moving, the witch brandishing her blade scowling at him.
“Demon,” she spat at him.
“Witch,” he spat back.
“You murdered my sister,” she growled, slicing at him with her knife. He dodged it easily, but he really didn’t want to fight. She wasn’t going to count towards his quota so there was no point in killing her, except to get her off his back.
“I don’t know who you’re talking about,” he answered honestly.
“I saw you!” she yelled. “You were at the bar! Then you shifted,” she said, taking another deep jab at him.
He dodged again, but he could tell she was going to cause a scene with the way she was going. He had to get out and fast. When she lunged again, Jungkook took her by the wrist and threw her onto the ground and took off running. He ran towards the hotel, his only instinct was telling him to head for you.
He bolted into the elevator and then took off towards your shared room. It was almost two am, he didn’t want to wake you but he was afraid he wasn’t going to be given an option.
“Baby,” he called, walking into the room.
You were asleep on the bed, curled up right where he left you. He moved closer and kissed your shoulder. “Baby, Y/N, we gotta go,” he said, urging you to wake.
You did so slowly, exhaustion filling your limbs and making them heavier than lead. “What? What’s wrong Kook?” you murmured, reaching for him slowly.
“Need you to get up, we’ve got trouble,” he said.
Your eyes cleared and you moved to get dressed quickly. Jungkook was starting to grab your stuff when the window to your room shattered.
“Fuck!” You screamed, falling back on the floor as the witch jumped through the now broken window.
“Y/N!”
The witch stood and glared at you. You felt the hostility and rage pouring off her in waves. Whatever Jungkook did, he really really pissed her off. Without much more ceremony you stood and blocked her from Jungkook.
“What are you doing?” you asked, voice firm. “What the fuck is going on?”
“That fucking demon killed my sister-and you... you’re a fucking witch! What the hell are you doing with a demon anyways? Did you summon it?”
“Him,” you corrected. “I didn’t summon him, I’m helping return him to hell,” you stated calmly.
“And helping it return to hell involves fucking it?”
You bristled at her tone.
“You don’t know what you’re talking about,” you warned, feeling your magic swirl in your fingertips.
“Baby-”
“Don’t Jungkook, you stay behind me right now,” you stated.
The witch looked at you with curious eyes. “You love this demon?”
Jungkook’s head snapped to you as you stared straight ahead. This witch was bad news. She wasn’t from your coven, but she was from one in this region you were certain. This was exactly what you didn’t want to happen. Because now she was picking a fight with a different coven. And she knew. She knew you were falling in love with Jungkook and it was her greatest weapon against you in this moment.
You hardly had time to blink before she made her first attack, a flash of lightning directed for Jungkook. You didn’t even move in order to cast your magic, you made a ward that protected him entirely without even the lift of a finger.
“You’re strong, how old are you?” she asked, like the question was an average thing to hear from another person.
“Old enough to know when to pick my battles. I don’t want to fight with you, and Jungkook doesn’t either-”
“That demon killed my sister! I won’t let it live,” she growled.
“I won’t let him die,” you said with a deep tone. Your eyes flashed purple and you sent magical flames towards her feet. They wouldn’t burn anything but the intended target. She shrieked and jumped onto the bed, rolling and throwing a knife towards you. With a quick flash you stopped the blade in the air and turned it towards her, propelling it forward with your magic.
Jungkook was stunned to say the least. He’d never seen you use your magic like this before. He didn’t even know you were capable of this much mana manipulation and things of the like. He knew you were strong before because of how much energy you’d always been able to give him, but this was on an entirely different level.
“You’re betraying your sisters for this?!” the witch cried.
“I am,” you said, a shot of ice towards her. Elemental magic was much more complex than most witches understood, so to have you wielding it so effortlessly had Jungkook impressed all over again.
She dodged it.
“What’s your name huh? What coven do you belong to?” you asked, warding against another attack.
“My name is Maya Tudor, I’m from the Coven of Nyx Rienhardt, and we will not tolerate the murder of one of our own,” she hollered.
“You’re not supposed to act on your own,” you said, blocking more of her attacks. “You’re meant to report this to Nyx herself. She would then dispose of me how she sees fit,” you said, pushing back against her. “Acting on your own without the thought of your sisters is just as damning. Isn’t that what I’m doing? You’re acting no better than me, little witchling.”
Maya shoved back against your wards, causing you and Jungkook to stumble onto the floor. Jungkook caught you, holding you close as Maya attempted another strike when you snapped back with a whip of ice.
She cried as the magic burned her skin, causing a blister to form along her arm. “Fucking bitch!” she snarled, standing back as Jungkook pulled you to your feet.
“Come on,” he said, pulling you towards the door.
The pair of you booked it down the hallway, the sound of Maya hot on your heels made you concerned. People weren’t supposed to know witches and demons or anything in regards to the supernatural. Maya was breaking more rules than you were at this point.
Jungkook and you made it to the parking garage.
He was just trying to get you to the car so you could gather a bit of your strength to help the pair of you get away. At least for now.
“Jungkook, slow down!” you cried, stumbling over your feet.
“Can’t, we gotta get out of here Y/N,” he said, pulling harder.
“Jungkook she’s gonna hear you-fuck!”
With a pained whimper, you fell to your knees. The car was just a hundred yards away. “Y/N?!”
You held your side, as a small dagger peaked between your fingers. Jungkook kneeled with you, looking at the damage. You’d survive, he just had to get you in the fucking car.
Unfortunately, it seemed you had different plans.
You lifted yourself up onto your feet, wavering slightly as you stared at the brat of a witchling who you knew wouldn’t know any better. But honestly, this was too much. You weren’t going to lose Jungkook to her.
Yourself on the other hand...
“Enough,” you said, pulling the dagger from your side and dropping it to the floor. Maya looked at you with disdain evident in her eyes.
“I will get revenge for my fallen sister,” she growled.
“I won’t let you hurt him,” you declared firmly.
Jungkook swallowed hard. This witch was different then he’d originally anticipated. He was starting to sense a difference in her magic. You were taking most of the hits and he wondered why, up until now.
She could slay a demon with the blade she’d hit you with.
Banishing magic.
No wonder you were being so fiercely protective. One hit with those blades and Jungkook would be killed. Or at the very least, sent back to hell.
But you were already hurt, he didn’t want to see you get injured even more.
“Baby,” he called softly.
“Don’t, don’t distract me or she’s going to-”
She sent rapid fire bolts towards you that you had to work hard to dodge, messing with your orientation enough that you stumbled. Jungkook tried to support you but you waved him off. “Go, go baby, get out of here.”
Jungkook scoffed in shock. You were going to sacrifice yourself... for him?
That’s when he understood what Maya said in the hotel room.
You loved him...
Jungkook’s throat got tight as he thought about you. However, his heart didn’t race. It couldn’t, he couldn’t love you the way he is now. Even if he was more human than most demons, he was still-ultimately-a creature of chaos. A creature that didn’t have a typical set of emotions.
Although he knew... He knew deep within himself had he been human, he would love you. He’d love you with everything he was if... if only he could.
Perhaps he should do this for you. He should make the call and give you the last thing he can.
His life.
It would always be yours.
You and Maya were going back and forth. You were doing harder work, protecting yourself and Jungkook as Maya made ground with her attacks. The wound on your side was aching, and there was nothing you could do about it. Not without losing more of your energy that could be spent protecting and hopefully getting this bitch to leave you and Jungkook alone.
You were sweating, the magic energy finally starting to drain. However, the witchling didn’t look much better. If you could just hold out a little longer.
Unfortunately, there was a hidden trump card.
Maya shouted an incantation before you were surrounded with bright light. The pain hit you first as you thudded to the ground gasping, Maya had slammed you with lightning. You weren’t even able to get a ward up to protect yourself from the exhaustion coursing through your veins. Jungkook moved in front of you.
Maya stalked towards Jungkook with purpose. You whimpered from the ground, looking at him with a pained expression. He just gave you his smile before turning to face the witchling once more.
“If I let you kill me, will you leave her alone?�� Jungkook asked.
“Jungkook, no!” you cried desperately.
Maya considered it for a moment. “Yes, her coven will take care of her.”
You tried to get up, sending a bolt of ice towards her once more. It threw her on her ass for a moment before she was aiming another lightning bolt in your direction.
“Y/N enough!” Jungkook said, looking back at you. “I’ll do this for you, okay?”
“No, no please don’t do that,” you begged.
Maya approached Jungkook, taking the invitation and slamming a blade into his back. With a grunt Jungkook fell to his knees.
It hurt like a bitch.
But the look on your face was infinitely worse. You looked so sad.
“Justice for my sister has been served, I will leave you to your coven.”
With that, the witchling limped off, her powers effectively drained just as much as yours. If not more so. The only reason she won is because you were doing the work of two people.
It didn’t matter now.
“Jungkook,” you cried, crawling forwards to grab him.
He was bleeding black blood, it was pouring out of the deep gash from the knife in his back. The banishing magic made it so he couldn’t heal himself. Not even your energy would save him now, not like you had enough of it to spare.
“It’s okay,” he said softly, looking up at you. “This should be enough,” he huffed.
“No, I don’t want you to die please,” you said, voice watery and eyes tearing up.
Jungkook smiled at you. “Don’t cry baby, please don’t cry-I hate it,” he said, reaching to wipe your tears with his thumb. “I’m not worth crying over.”
“You are to me!” you sobbed. “Jungkook... I lov-”
“Shhh,” he shushed you. “I don’t deserve to hear those words,” he said, laying back. “I couldn’t even use my powers to protect you because of how far I’ve let myself fall... You had to make me a fuckin potion so I could hunt, baby,” he coughed. “Don’t say those words to me, I want to say them back but I can’t...”
You were crying hard enough for your shoulders to shake. “Please Jungkook, I don’t care if you can’t say them. I don’t care,” you promised.
“I do,” he whispered. “I want to say them to you someday. But not yet, save it for then...”
You nodded, barely able to speak anymore. “Don’t go...”
Jungkook breathed out slowly. “I’ll see you... again... Promise...”
With those words, Jungkook’s human frame disintegrated into ash, his clothes left behind in your lap and the blackened blood from his wound staining your hands. You gripped his shirt and cried desperately. You cried until your head ached.
You’d lost... everything.
--
Jungkook woke up in a forest. He wasn’t familiar with this place.
Was he wrong? Did he not get sent back to Hell?
“Nope, you didn’t,” a calm tone called from behind him. Jungkook whipped around to see a shorter man with blonde hair looking at him with peaceful features.
“Who are you?” he asked, stumbling backwards. Where was he? And what was going on?
“I’m Jimin - and to answer those questions stumbling around in that head of yours - we are currently in purgatory,” he said.
“How-”
“Can I know what you’re thinking?” he asked, finishing Jungkook’s statement. He rolled his eyes.
“Stop that,” he demanded. “I thought I would end up in Hell, why am I in purgatory?”
Jimin sighed deeply. “It’s complicated. But, I’ll explain it the best I can... You are a demon that is being punished by the Knights of Hell for acting in the interest of a human - is that correct? You’re Jungkook?”
“Yes, I am,” Jungkook confirmed.
“Very well, then I am here to offer you a wish.”
Jungkook’s eyes widened. “A-A wish?”
Jimin smiled, eyes disappearing as he chuckled. “Yes, a wish. Just one. You were a demon that sacrificed your life for the life of another. We Angels have deemed that you are entitled to a wish for your acts,” he explained. “Choose wisely,” his voice turned serious.
Jungkook could hardly believe what he was hearing. A wish? For saving you? The woman he wanted to love. He still had this feeling in his chest that he didn't deserve it. He didn’t deserve you. But, maybe he could. If he tried. If he made his wish and found you again, would you take him back? Would you let him love you properly this time?
There was only one way to find out.
“It seems you’ve thought of a wish?” Jimin said with kind eyes.
“A life - with her,” Jungkook breathed. “I wish for a life with her.”
“It will be a human life, you won’t have any magical abilities or powers. I can give you enough money to sustain you for a time but nothing longer than a year. From there you are on your own. If you die or are injured before finding her there is nothing I can do about that,” Jimin said.
Jungkook nodded. “I want a life with her, that is my wish. As long as I can be with her that is all I want.”
“Then that is how it shall be.”
--
How had three years gone by already?
You asked yourself this as you wiped down a counter at your job in a local cafe. Your coven had exiled you. You were extremely lucky they didn’t kill you. But they’d taken your magic-giving you enough to leave town and never return.
With that you hadn’t looked back. You only looked ahead, the only person you wanted could be out there right now. Right this very second. You only had enough magic left for a few tracking spells, and they’d led you to the countryside. A smaller town, but big enough to hide in if necessary.
You were hoping he was here. Your magic had never steered you wrong before, you just wanted to see him again.
Was he alright? Did they hurt him in Hell? Was he still a demon or was he able to become human...
All these thoughts swirled in your head. You cleaned the counter tops and the other tables and helped your boss, Seokjin, lock up for the evening.
“Alrighty,” he said, wiping his hands off and smiling. “You’re free to head home! Felix comes in tomorrow morning so you can take the day off if you want?” he said, a twinkle in his eye.
You tilted your head but nodded regardless. “Alright...”
What an odd one this guy was, but you decided to let it go-just appreciative of the day off tomorrow as you’d been working doubles the last week.
Seokjin came closer with a smile. His irises flashed a bright neon green for just a moment. You could’ve sworn it happened but somehow you almost doubted your own eyes.
“Go home safely, Y/N, don’t worry about tomorrow here Felix will cover for you,” he said. “Have a good evening.”
With that, he placed his baseball cap on his head and trotted away.
Your mind clicked for a moment but all you could feel was appreciation.
No wonder Seokjin accepted you so quickly.
One exiled witch helps the other...
A small smile was on your face as you made your way back home to your apartment. It was tiny, but it was home and you honestly rather preferred the small space. You’d worked hard to make it cozy and welcoming and-
What the fuck?
The door wasn’t latched. You’d locked and latched that door when you came home. The only other person who had a key is Seokjin which you gave to him for emergencies only and this-
“Baby?”
Your head snapped up at the voice you thought you heard. But when you finally laid eyes on him, it was hard to believe he was actually here.
You looked at him, unable to process that he was actually there. Right there in front of you and you could just reach out and touch him but... the tears started faster.
“What...?” your voice was weak and breathless.
Jungkook stood before you, looking almost as if he’d never left. His hair was still long and curly. He was dressed in decent enough clothes, nothing fancy but he looked strong and well fed. Your heart was trembling in your chest at the mere thought of him coming back to you.
He was a demon, he didn’t have to do anything like this for a simple witch turned human. But here he was, standing inside your apartment.
“Hi...” he trailed off, looking sheepish.
“How did you...?” you asked, slowly moving closer into the apartment and out of the chill of the night. “How did you find me?”
Jungkook shut the door behind you and you turned to fling your arms around his neck. He caught you easily with a shy smile on his face.
“I’ll always find you,” he said, like in some cheesy romance movie. But it made your heart throb in longing all over again.
“Are you a demon? You don’t feel like a demon-”
Jungkook snorted at your questions, knowing that you still couldn’t quite believe he was here. He held you close by your waist, kissing your temple as you breathed him in. “Baby... I’m not a demon, I’m human, just like you,” he said.
It couldn’t be possible. You didn’t just hear those words from him. “H-Human?”
He pulled back from your embrace just enough to look into your eyes. “Look, I don’t have any demonic energy,” he said, his eyes deep brown and there was nothing underneath them but warmth.
Human.
“How?” you asked, reaching forward to touch his face with a shaky hand. He held your hand against his face and leaned into your touch.
“Because I didn’t want to live without you,” he said. “I wound up in purgatory, and Angel granted me a wish due to me sacrificing my life for yours-I wished for... for a life with you, because my time with you-well... I only got a taste of it and I want more, I want more of those days like the ones at my place. I just want to be with you.”
Tears thatched along your lashes as you pulled him closer again.
“Can I say it now?” you whispered against his chest.
Jungkook laughed softly and kissed your head. “I hope to hear it often,” he said, leaning down and pulling you into a sweet kiss. “But wait just a bit longer,” he said, kissing you again.
You were wrapped up into his embrace as he pulled you back towards the couch. You eagerly followed, letting the moment of your reunion fuel this passion boiling in your stomach.
Jungkook kept kissing you, almost as if he were trying to remember every inch of your lips. His hands trailed down your body, squeezing and moaning softly at the alluring softness. “Fuck... Fuck baby,” he grit out.
A teasing smile made its way onto your face. “Yeah? What do you want, Kook?” you nudged your nose against his. You sat down on the couch and pulled him closer by his pants.
He sucked his lower lip between his teeth, watching with hazy eyes as you fished his hardening cock out of his pants. “Please baby, suck my cock for me, missed your pretty mouth so much,” he said, running his thumb from your jaw to your throat and pressing gingerly.
Your lips ran over his cock tantalizingly and Jungkook had to swallow to make sure he didn’t cum on your face. He hadn’t been touched since the last time you two were together and having human stamina now made it a little harder to refrain from his eagerness.
But, Jungkook knew what patience meant, so he calmed himself but his cock was heavy and throbbing in your hands.
“Fuck... must hurt to be this hard,” you said, and before he could growl at you to get started you swallowed his cock with practiced ease. You ran your hands up under his shirt and dragged your nails down his lower stomach while you sucked his cock deeper into your throat.
Jungkook’s hand made it into your hair, gripping it as you bobbed your head to pleasure him. He sighed out harshly through his nose and you knew he was enjoying it. If you could smile you would’ve, his little tells were still the same. He smirked down at you, watching as your pretty eyes locked with his.
“Suck it so well baby, always so good for me my angel,” he groaned, voice turning whiny at the end. “Fuck!”
You took his balls in your hand and palmed them gently. Jungkook’s eyes rolled back in his head, breaths coming out short and stilted at your pleasuring him. You pulled off him for a moment to catch your breath. “Love sucking your cock baby, love it so much,” you smiled.
Jungkook laughed a breath out and ran his thumb over your bottom lip. You bit on it gently causing him to smile. “You wet for me?” he asked, his eyes sparkling.
You dropped his cock and quickly pulled your pants off as you sat on the couch. Jungkook mirrored your actions, taking his clothes off as you laid yourself on the couch with your knees up, hiding the place he wanted the most right now.
Now, Jungkook wasn’t above begging. In fact, he rather enjoyed it from time to time. He crawled to you, naked and smiling. His hands wound around your calves and squeezed them gently before placing kisses along your shins and ankles.
“Please baby,” he said, lips trailing along your skin and leaving goosebumps in their wake. “Please open your legs?” he asked, voice sweet and pleading. “Gonna let me eat this pussy? Want my tongue on you?”
You smiled and pulled him in for a kiss while opening your legs so he could touch. He kissed you passionately before leaving tender smooches along the soft swells of your skin. Your breasts first, capturing a nipple between his sinfully sweet lips as his hand trailed to your dripping pussy. He let out a desperate breath against your chest when he pushed a finger inside your heat. “Fuck, fuck baby your pussy-fuck,” he said, moving from your chest to your core with deft movements.
Jungkook looked at your core swallowing his fingers and you couldn’t help the mewls falling from your lips. “B-Baby!” you whined softly, running your hand through his hair.
“Yeah,” he breathed against your core. His eyes flicked up to yours and they swirled with hunger. “What is it baby?”
You swallowed hard, biting your lip. “Eat me baby? Please, so needy for you,” you begged.
One of your favorite things about sex with Jungkook was he could be in charge one moment, then the next second you could take it from him. It made the intimacy between the two of you spontaneous and alluring. Jungkook knew you just as well as you knew him and that was exciting. It made you cry for him, begging for the pleasure and bliss you knew only he could give you.
“Alright angel, lean back and let me make you cum,” he said, pulling you closer by your thighs so he could eat your pussy the way he wanted. He placed several warm kisses along your inner thighs before running his tongue through your folds with a fat lick to your clit. You cried softly for him to continue, which he did.
Jungkook made each lick on your center hotter than the last, running his tongue over your clit differently each time. Your feet twitched when he sucked on your core with his plush lips. “Fuck, fuck-Jungkook!” you whimpered, pulling his hair back and away from his face so you could see his flushed face between your thighs.
“Taste so good baby,” he moaned, smiling before licking into your cunt once more.
“K-Koo,” you said. “Please baby, wanna cum,” you moaned sweetly.
His chest throbbed at the sound of your pleased noises. He really wasn’t sure if what he felt with you before was love, but now? Now he knew it wasn’t, because the feeling in his chest... the one taking home in his heart right now was absolutely love.
“I’ll get you there baby,” he promised, sucking your clit into his mouth. He pushed two fingers inside you this time, making your stomach clench in bliss.
“Yeah~ Right there Kook, right there baby please!”
He worked you up further and further, pushing his fingers along with his tongue to create a tension in your belly that had you fit to burst. But just as you would feel yourself cresting to that perfect orgasm waiting for you, he’d slow down or remove his mouth from you entirely.
After the third time you cried at him for it.
“Koo! Baby, please-lemme cum, wan’ it,” you begged, your hairline was sweaty and Jungkook smiled at your desperate sounding voice.
“Tell me one thing baby, then I’ll let you cum,” he said, working you up for the fourth time.
“Anything baby, anything you want.” Your weak tone made him smirk.
“Tell me you love me baby, say you love me and I’ll make you cum,” he said, moving over you to kiss your lips while his fingers still played between your legs.
Your heart stammered in your chest at his request. But it was an easy smile that made it to your face as you answered him after your kiss. “I love you,” you murmured, kissing him with those beautiful words fresh from your lips.
He wanted to kiss those words, he wanted to kiss you and tell you the same... “Baby, Y/N,” he breathed, capturing your lips in a reverent kiss. “I love you,” he said.
Jungkook was stunned at how simple it was to say, and yet it made his heart quake. “I love you, Y/N,” he repeated.
“Jungkook,” you gasped when he pulled his fingers from you to put them in your mouth. You cleaned them as he seemed to want and he moaned with the need to be inside you. Although you were just as eager. Your hand reached down to pump his woefully neglected cock. Jungkook moaned against your temple, hips rutting slightly at the stimulation.
“Want me to put it in now?” he asked, voice breathless.
“Yes,” you whined.
Jungkook didn’t make you wait, taking his cock and lining it up with your soaking pussy. He gave you a look and you just nodded, giving him your consent and with that he pushed inside slowly. You both moaned in pleasure. “Fuck... fuck you’re so wet,” he panted.
“Jungkook!” you cried out. He kissed you desperately then, his mouth searching and hot against your own.
“M’right here baby, always gonna be right here,” he said, voice tender against your skin.
You mewled at his gentle thrusts to open you up. It was so much and yet not enough. “More,” you pleaded with him, hands finding his back.
A sharper thrust made your eyes roll back. “Right there?” he asked, eyes wild and chest heaving. He’d been holding off really well but now that he was inside of your pussy it was game over. He loved being inside of you like this far too much. “Baby your pussy feels so good. Fuck, fuck please,” he gasped.
You smiled at his frantic features. He didn’t want to cum without you. It was sweet, but he really didn’t need to worry. You had almost cum just from him putting it in.
“Jungkook, c-close,” you said, eyes watery and pretty in the evening light.
He nodded. “I’m right there too,” he whispered, thrusting harder and harder into you. It had you seeing stars. He kissed you, sucking on your lips and tangling your tongues together. “Yes, yes, fuck...”
The tightening in your stomach was finally on the verge of snapping once more. Jungkook was whispering sweet words into your ears as he pounded you against your couch. “Fuck-fuck!” you sobbed, arms wrapped around his neck as he covered your body.
You felt a heat in your belly as your orgasm rushed through your body in deep pulses. Jungkook was stunned as you creamed his cock, pulling him along shortly into his own climax as he painted your walls white with his release.
He groaned your name against your neck, shivering and gently coaxing the pair of you through your two highs. You turned your head to kiss him, smiling softly.
“Holy shit,” he laughed, looking at you with a dizzying smile. “Give me a second baby, your pussy almost killed me.”
You snorted at him, kissing him once more regardless. “I missed you,” you said tenderly, pulling him closer. Even as his cock softened inside of you.
Jungkook kissed you back, cradling your head as he pulled out. His eyes met yours and he gave a sweet smile. “I missed you too, but I’ll be here from now on... I’m yours, if you want me.”
“I’ve always wanted you, Jungkook,” you said, kissing his jaw and relishing in the afterglow that was settling into your warm body.
“Keep me then,” he said with a smile.
“I’ll keep you-forever...”
#bangtan sorciere#52hertz#bts#bts smut#jungkook#jungkook smut#demon jungkook#jungkook x reader#reader insert#Bts fanfic#bts fantasy au#witch reader#jessika hathaway
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「Feel the magic ๛ l.n」
part iv
✧.* though you're still struggling with yourself and your relationship with lando, life is good or at least, that's what you think.
✧.* I like when reader suffers, like yes babes, cry a bit more 🥰 Toxic friends once again? Uh, yes please 🥰 this is a psa for the people who wanted to be on my taglist but never got tagged, i didn't forget or ignore you, I simply am unable to tag you and therefore removed you from the list feel free to ask me again so I can take a look at it. Taglist is open Love ya ❤️
✧.* prev part - next part
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landonorris
liked by carlossainz55, riabish and 654,897 others
landonorris 🧡
view all 1,678 comments
byelandooo well that's one way to hard launch lmfao
landitosainz great way to ruin a team 💀🤮
cecilemoulin wrong account you gremlin
norrisbae such a lando thing to do 😭
norry4 you're telling me lando's got a private insta too? what y'all hiding for us? 👀
maxfewtrell don't think this was meant to be posted here but where's the credit for the pictures mate?
johnnyp lucky son of a bitch
milouberger muppets 🧡
norrizz no but this is exactly how I imagined this relationship to go, just a bunch of idiots together 😭
carlandooo muppet and his crack head 🥰
mrsnorris 🤮
charlos16 man's really said hard launch
smoothoperatorr this is wrong on so many levels 🤡
carlossainz55 happy for you guys!
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y/nusername posted to their story
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mclaren
liked by landonorris, y/nusername and 187,672 others
mclaren first race of the season is done! 🏁 we can confirm..it was a good weekend!
tagged: landonorris, y/nusername
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teammclaren we are so back baby!
freddiem y/n would've had pole if Milou didn't impend her like crazy
julieeeexo milou was not having y/n this weekend..first the impending, then nearly pushing her off the track during the race..
norrizz nah she was aggressive! We could've had a double podium!
norrislando p2 and p4 baby!!
matty28 the team bringing mclaren back to the front 👏
carlitonorris what's up with milou? Is she jealous because lando's and y/n's relationship seems to work out perfectly and hers and charles' didn't? 💀
chilisainz exactly what I was thinking 🤡
y/nloveee we could've had both of them on the podium but p4 for the babe is amazing too! 🧡
julianklein she's washed up, it's time for her to retire. outperformed by her teammate.
y/nloveee so everyone who's outperformed by their teammate today is washed up? Okay, cool, can't wait to see half the grid retire next week 🤡
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gossipf1
liked by 672 others
gossipf1 we didn't have to wait long for the proof to be posted, these pictures of Carlos and y/n have been circulating the internet since last night. Who shared the pictures is unknown.
view all 315 comments
chilisainz considering these are very personal pictures and not random paparazzi shots, I'm willing to bet money on one of their friends leaking them..won't be the first time y/n gets screwed over like that..
carlandooo no because i think you're right 😔
charlessainz no but why are they actually giving?
leclerc_16 but why do they look so cute together? 👀
norrismax I can't be the only one finding this extremely uncomfortable..why would someone leak these pictures..you can't trust anybody anymore..
jamoniconico can't she just leave these drivers alone? 🤨
joeyy000 these men really out here pulling the baddest girl on the grid..
carlito55 see I prefer this duo over whatever lando and y/n is..
verstappencharles yes!!!!
maxmaxmax imagine being lando and seeing this and reading people prefer Carlos over you 😔
brocadesmerc why does she feel the need to date every single driver on the grid? Who's next, Charles? Esteban?
hammertime considering her ex Thomas is spanish too, I'd guess she's got a type and it's not french 😭
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milouberger posted to their story
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Everything taglist; @thomaslefteyebrow @hopefulinlove @smoothopz @softboystarkey @honethatty12 @cixrosie @parkersmjs @ireadthensuetheauthors @celestialams @be-your-coffee-pot @heli991113 @kodzuvk @reality-is-a-con @80sloverry @bibissparkles @myescapefromthislife @lanando4 @f1lover55
Feel the magic taglist: @celesteblack08 @mrsmaybank13 @cha-hot @judesgfirl @roseseraj @kissesandmartinis @jpg3 @amulhermaisfelizdomundo @marialovesf1 @silkenthusiasts @luvrrish @laneyspaulding19 @emily-b @formula1bby @judespoisons @buckybarnessweetheart @strawberrychita @iifloweringnightsii @buendiabebeta @jjsprobablywrong
Lando taglist: @beatricemiruna @simp-for-fictional-people @landossainz @christianpulisic10
#lando norris x reader#lando norris x you#lando norris x y/n#lando norris smau#lando norris fanfic#lando norris au#lando norris x oc#lando norris image#lando norris#lando x reader
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I'm your number one fan, I need Dick Grayson jealous.
I don't know what happened but I got so many DC and Marvel related asks all of a sudden. Like over 10 of them.
Pairing: Dick Grayson x Fem!Reader
Tags: fluff, developing relationship, confession, jealousy, desperate kissing, fear of rejection, pining, sharing clothes
A/N: Let's get some angst in first thing in the morning!
Jealous!Dick Grayson who is a big puppy when he's jealous. He's clingy, he's pouty, he gives you the silent treatment and then wonders why you're not talking to him. He would rather suffer in silence when he's jealous then make it seem like he can't stand the other guy talking to you. He will throw himself into work all day, every day to avoid having to think about it and then wrap you in the biggest hug when he sees you again.
"Have you been avoiding me this week? No, no, I noticed you talking to everyone else but not me, what's up with that huh? What do you mean I've been unavailable? I reply to every text you send. So you want me to try harder? You should have admitted you wanted my company, I would have given it to you."
Jealous!Dick Grayson who just so happens to forget one of his favorite jackets at your place and buys one just like it afterwards. He knows the kind of message it will send and he thinks you look adorable in his jacket, his colors. If anyone else offers you their clothes he'll interrupt, no so subtly either, and say that he's feeling a bit too warm so you can just have his, no need to take anyone else's clothes.
"You're cold, here, you have can my jacket. I'm gonna be fine, you know I'm quick on my feet, I can get home pretty fast. No need to give it back, I have one pretty similar to it anyway. It looks way better on you then it ever did on me anyway."
Jealous!Dick Grayson who keeps his feelings secret as much as possible unless he notices someone flirting with you. Or if you show interest in someone else. He doesn't know how to act in a way that won't give away his feelings for you and he's always trying to stay close to you in case someone makes a move on you. He isn't able to keep himself away from you, his hand away from yours or his angry eyes off the other person.
"I'm glad they backed off when they did, they seemed to be making you a little uncomfortable. You should learn to tell people no you know that? You... like it when I do it for you. Oh! I... I see. I can do that for you any time. I can be your personal bodyguard. What do you mean that's hot? Ha, you're so silly sometimes."
Jealous!Dick Grayson who gets so scared of you rejecting him that he decided to shoot his shoot just before he has to go on a week long mission. His kiss is so desperate, deep, a little salty because you can taste his tears. He's been hiding these feelings for so damn long, and now that they're out he's not even giving you the opportunity to respond properly.
"Tell me when I come back. Whatever it is, I'll accept it. And please, please don't do it over text, that's gonna be so embarrassing for me. Or in front of our friends. You know what, why don't I come and see you after my mission. You'll leave the window open for me right?"
Jealous!Dick Grayson who doesn't get any less jealous when you're in a relationship with him. If anything he goes from a big puppy to the silently aggressive guard dog. He will kiss you any time he sees someone coming onto you, no questions asked. And to rub it in their face even more he will make sure you kiss him back just as hard and show everyone how much you love him and only him.
"Was the kiss too much for you? I wasn't thinking in the moment, but judging from the way you kissed me you liked it. You didn't allow that flirting just to get a kiss from me did you? If you wanted my attention in pubic there are easier ways to make sure that happens."
#dick grayson x reader#nightwing x reader#dick grayson x female!reader#nightwing x female reader#dick grayson x you#nightwing x you#dick grayson imagine#dick grayson headcanon#dick grayson fluff#nightwing imagine#nightwing headcanon#nightwing fluff#titans x reader#titans x female reader#titans imagine#titans headcanons#titans fluff#titans x you#dc comics x reader#dc comics imagine#dc comics headcanons#dc comics x female reader#dc comics fluff
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I just read your Zhongli reuniting with his wife fic and I absolutely adore it! Could I request a continuation of that where the two talk things out and forgive each other?
galaxies unseen in shavings of jade.
↳ zhongli × gn!immortal!artist!reader
↳ part one, part two
↳ genre: angst with a happy ending | wordcount: 2.8k | warnings: none that i can tell
↳ notes: HI 😭 god sorry that took so long. between the writers block and the anxiety i struggled to end it in a way that made sense. but i think im happy with what i made here. i really did enjoy writing both the first and second part of this :') so i hope you enjoy this one just as much
shoutout to @ad0rechuu for helping me out of writer's block :')
Truth be told, Zhongli had no idea how to talk to you. He was clumsy in matters of the heart. Despite all his years and experience, he could never have prepared himself for how thoroughly you bewitched him. He wondered if you noticed at some point and simply never told him. While embarrassing, it did relieve him in a way. It only meant you didn't mind it. The mere fact that you allowed him the grace of holding you close meant you might have even been enamored by his eccentricities. He would be lying if he said he wasn't terrified of you pulling away one day. What would he do with himself then?
Unfortunately, he'd gotten his answer.
Inexperienced as he was with the heart, the Geo Archon was steadier than the oldest rock formation; stubborn as a boulder that refused to break through the horrors of the Archon War, and through the deep ache of losing you.
He braved through it. Though not without the damage.
Five hundred years later, there was no more war in Liyue. No more strife and suffering tearing through his nation. But most strikingly, no you. He was plagued late in the night with the thought of giving back the era of peace if it meant he could have even a sliver of your presence in his life again.
He couldn't do that. He wouldn't.
But he thought of it. Frequently.
One day after the war, he couldn't find you anywhere. Sunrise had just begun to peek past the mountains, lightening the shadow of night, as if Celestia had descended to celebrate the end of the war. It had been a long night of fighting. Issuing orders among his adepti. Finding out what he should say to you when he got home.
You were both incredibly stubborn. It was a part of you Morax adored, no matter how many arguments the two of you went through because of it. But he feared the night before may have gone overboard. He'd thought you were being foolish, trying to risk your life on the battlefield. What were you thinking? Didn't you know how far everything would fall if you were to get hurt on his watch? Didn't you understand how much the guilt would consume him? How much he would crumble without you to steady him? You were his partner. His confidante. His everything.
He didn't understand you either. Didn't understand that you only wanted to help. That you wanted to prove he didn't have to be alone on the frontlines. That you would have his back as readily as he would have yours. Too late, did he finally think of it that way. It was only after the words have been said, like venom being spat. Morax had gone back to his war, exactly what you told him not to do. And as for you, it seemed you had followed suit.
He sought you out immediately. Days and nights of searching later, he found you speaking with General Musatas.
"I'm leaving."
All these years later, Zhongli knew how much of a mistake this was— he hid. Your words sent a chill through him, as if his blood had turned to ice. Despite the slight tremble in your voice, there was a bit of fire there. The one he recognized in you when you were set on a decision.
"Are.. Are you sure?" Yingda questioned. Her voice dropped to a hesitant whisper, and he had to strain to hear. "But Morax—"
"Forget Morax." You snapped. "I can't speak with him right now. Don't tell him where I'm going please."
"I don't even know where you're going." She exclaimed. "Yn.."
"I'll be safe. You know I can handle myself." Then, with some bitterness: "At least, someone does."
Yingda whined, unsure. "Will you return.. one day? Will we be able to see you again?"
The warmth in your voice made your lover ache.
"Liyue is at peace. I'm sure I will see you lot again at some point. Maybe even at the little harbor the humans have constructed. You spoke of wanting to go there with your fellow yakshas, haven't you?"
"Yes, but.. Are you sure? Truly sure you want to leave?"
You paused. Morax grasped at the silence with bated breath.
"Yes." You said.
Then all the wind was knocked out of him. The war was over. He'd been defeated. He couldn't even find it in himself to watch you go.
—
A moment of weakness was stolen in between the five hundred years of stubbornness.
You, wrought through nightmares of the Archon War and exhaustion weighing you down like an anchor, trudged through the harbor. Your arms wrapped around your figure in a feeble attempt to protect yourself from the cold night air.
It was a moment between moments— witnessed by only you and the swarm of stars in the heavens.
You'd stopped at the bridge, bracing yourself on the rail with a heavy exhale.
You missed him. His warmth. His voice.
Visions of spilled ichor and the ruthless clang of weapons filled your pained mind.
You wished you lost the argument all those years ago.
You hated that.
You hated him. You hated yourself.
You missed him more though.
For a mere second, slowed by fear and the precariousness of your hope, you opened your mouth, about to speak.
And then the second ended. Tears spilled from your eyes, warming your cool face. You thought only of bloodshed. From the war, and whatever it was that happened to your relationship after it.
You cursed yourself. You couldn't just call him now, could you? Not after deserting him and vowing never to come back.
You conjured the situation in your mind's eye. Rex Lapis, Geo Archon from even before the war— the most ancient and formidable of them all, summoned by his ex at the drop of a hat. It felt like a particularly unfunny joke made at your expense.
There was no way he'd want you anymore after all that.
And so that night remained a secret between you and the stars. And if you stayed at the bridge a few minutes longer with the unfounded hope he might see you there waiting for him, and still love you, then it was for only the stars to discuss.
—
The second biggest mistake of Zhongli's life was not running to you the moment he saw you again after all that time.
It was a little secret between him and the wind. And partially, Director Hu, who had accompanied him into the art exhibit in the first place.
It hadn't even been his intention to attend. A particular painting turned his head as he passed by— a meadow of glaze lilies. Not an uncommon scene portrayed by mortal artists. But there had been a certain feeling it evoked in him, catching his gaze a second longer than it ought to.
Hu Tao saw him looking at the painting and skipped inside despite his protest. And so, Zhongli breathed out a sigh and went after her.
"Was this the one you were looking at?" She asked.
"Yes." He eyed the painting with scrutiny. "Glaze lilies.."
Hu Tao hummed in agreement. "It is quite beautiful."
Zhongli agreed. But there was something else to it. Something that made him really rack his brain for the word— familiarity.
It had been centuries since a scene of glaze lilies bountiful enough to form a field so blue. He doubted any mortal would have lived long enough to have seen one, and yet, this particular depiction was spot on. Every azure brush stroke dashed over the canvas like rolling tides, perfectly recapturing the luster of seeing a glaze liliy's sparkling quality up close. Truly, a sea of them. Just as the poems of old described. Just how Zhongli remembered them before the flowers' numbers dwindled down to a rarity. Almost as if the painter themselves had been there with him to witness their bloom in spring.
Zhongli ended up enjoying the art exhibit, after all. He took extra note of the work by the artist of the glaze lilies. Whoever they were had a tendency for plain scenes. And yet, the depictions of things as mundane as jade shavings were as vibrant as galaxies, reflecting against the color of the harbor's light. He couldn't help but find a certain charm in the style. And the aforementioned familiarity. The longer he looked at each scene, the more he felt as though he was present when they were sketching out the shapes.
"Do you reckon we could find the artist at this very exhibit?" Hu Tao piped up.
Zhongli took a moment to realize she was speaking.
"Ah. Perhaps." He nearly stammered, then cleared his throat as he turned to look at her. "It is not uncommon for them to go about and ask opinions of their work."
"You know, you've been particularly attracted to this artist." Hu Tao teased lightly. "We do need your portrait done for the directory. Maybe I could ask them?"
Zhongli chuckled, about to respond to her quip.
Then there you were, turning around the corner. There were earthquakes with less magnitude than the effect you had on him.
Suddenly, everything made sense. The paintings were all yours. They were in your style hidden under a pen name. They were yours. As comfortable a sight to him as the ones you used to make sitting next to him in Jueyun Karst.
Panic seized him then. What would you think of him? Here? At your work? Would you spare him a glance after the first? Would you shun him? Remove him from the premises? No one knew who he was but you, but you alone was certainly enough for him to listen.
Worse yet, Hu Tao was present. She was an inquisitive woman. She was quite smart when she wanted to be, and Zhongli did not want to divulge five centuries worth of heartbreak with her, or even himself.
With a similar sentiment, he didn't know if he could handle being rejected by you a second time. He didn't want to cause you trouble at work where you were clearly enjoying yourself.
You made a coward out of him. You reduced the Archon of Liyue to a fumbling boy with a crush, even back then. Especially now. And in that moment, it was your brilliant smile that intimidated him most.
You looked happy without him.
—
You didn't know what had possessed Zhongli to run after you as you crossed the funeral parlor's threshold.
Brow creasing in bewilderment, you turned to him. It was only a few steps, yet he looked out of breath. Frantic, even.
"..Mr. Zhongli?"
"Please." You didn't miss the way he reached out, hand inches away from your own. It fell back to his side as he steeled himself to speak again.
You readjusted your bag hanging over your shoulder. "Yes?"
"Allow me to walk you back."
You raised an eyebrow at him.
"It's quite late. It.." He clasped his hands together behind his back, hesitating for a moment. "..I only want to be sure you reach your home safely."
So there you were, begrudgingly letting him walk you home. Only he didn't mention the fact he had no idea where you lived, so neither did you. For the moment, you were content with watching the pitiful jerk walk you in circles around the harbor, panicking and relaxing every few minutes as he tried to surmise which street he's supposed to lead you through.
Reach your home safely. What a joke. What, was he going to buy you flowers now too? The two of you had shared but a few conversations after all that silence, and he just.. Ugh. Did he think you were kidding? Did he think you would come crawling back or something?
Though, the longer you watched him, the more you felt as though you missed the mark. Maybe you had been getting ahead of yourself. He might only be being polite.
The two of you were standing by Chihu Rock, at the very edge of the bridge. For a moment, he turned to you as if he'd finally let the facade drop and admit he didn't know where to go, then he turned away again.
"Mr. Zhongli?"
"Yn."
You heaved out a sigh, tugging your bag closer over your shoulder.
"You don't—"
"I need to talk to you." He uttered, swiftly cutting you off.
Your throat seemed to close, leaving you out of breath despite the leisurely pace you'd taken throughout the walk. Unable to say anything, you only nodded.
Zhongli looked at you, amber eyes pinched with worry.
"I am truly sorry for what happened between us."
"You said that already."
"I–" Zhongli shifted his weight between his feet. He still couldn't quite look you in the eye. "I know, I just.. I don't think I'll be able to say it enough to compensate for the time I had spent brooding instead of.."
It was your turn to look away then, fingers twitching nervously along your bag strap. You could only watch his approach through the corner of your eye. He stopped mere inches away from you, his own gloved hands coming up like he didn't know where to put them; wondering if they still fit against you; shaking with the trepidation of it not being so. Of the very real possibility that you had.. moved on. Outgrown him. That he had been too late.
You remained strong, crossing your arms over your chest.
But your voice caught in your throat trying to get the words out. Your still couldn't meet his eyes. Then it all came out in a fragile whisper meant only for him. Hidden in the pocket of silence between you, under the hustle and bustle of the mortal night life, you whispered:
"What are you trying to say, Morax?"
Entirely unbeknownst to you, the use of his true name sent a shiver across his skin. Like a rush of adrenaline to push him along, it flowed through him in a spark of warmth.
He reached for your hand. He didn't quite hold it, moreso just your fingers, as if testing the waters of your tolerance.
How badly he wished he could kiss along your knuckles as he once had. How he ached for the blankness in your eyes to cease. To make way for the affection he allowed to get away from him.
What he didn't know was what you were thinking of: the night you went out to that very same bridge, aching for him in turn.
Well, there he was.
And there you were.
"Allow me back into your life." He pleaded at last. "Please, Yn, I.. I cannot afford to have you so close only for you to slip through my fingers once again."
"Morax.."
"I intend to fight for you this time." Zhongli's grip on your hand grew firm. "I should've done that long ago. I should have stayed with you, or I should have chased after you. I should have begged for you to stay, and I was a fool for not doing so. Forgive me."
You blinked at him. Your hand gripped the rail, thumb running nervously over the night-cooled wood. You were suddenly aware of the passersby at the edge of the city. A group of curious children watched you from afar, and in your attempt to ignore them, you looked up, and were forced to notice the glaringly close proximity you and Zhongli drew yourselves in. His cor lapis eyes cut like amber shards. Still, sincerity softened his expression. In turn, his earnestness softened you. You cursed him for how malleable he made you to his whims.
When you left, you had to build yourself back up. You learned how to stand on your own. You were so determined not to reduce yourself into some crying, besotted ex-spouse that you had confused loneliness for independence.
It hurt to realize that so late. It hurt that you could only realize that now, inches away from him, wanting nothing more than to forget yourself and cry into your lover's arms. It hurt just to look at him.
All this time, you could have just asked. There was no one to blame for your loneliness but you and your own foolish pride.
You sighed deeply, turning your gaze to the mountain ranges carving against the skyline.
"I don't feel like there's anything to forgive." You mumbled. His fingers crept into the space between yours as you talked. You held onto his touch with your very life. "I feel like I should be asking you that."
Zhongli frowned. "To that, I am not sure what to say."
You hummed, feet scuffing against the wooden planks of the bridge.
"Walk with me then? We certainly have time."
Your chest was alight looking at the brightness in his eyes when you said that.
"Gladly." Zhongli nodded, lightly squeezing your hand. You could see the corners of his lips fighting back a grin.
He really did miss you. As much as your emotional turmoil wanted to refute it, you knew him better than you could ever hate yourself. And you loved him more than anything.
You were only thankful he seemed to love you just as much.
#mine#my writing#fics#requests#¡#genshin impact x reader#zhongli#gi zhongli x reader#gi zhongli#zhongli x reader#zhongli x you#zhongli x y/n
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⚠️Attention:⚠️ very long post. It talks a little about: state of lack, take your desire off the pedestal, time it takes for a manifestation, get distracted about your manifestation , self-concept, and Cassies
one more night high and having crazy epiphanies about manifestations. and another day using a translator to translate my text to post here, because I haven't claimed to be fluent in English yet 😛 So, as I always warn, if there are possible grammatical errors, it's for this reason.
I'm here to bring you an analogy I created while discussing with a friend haha. (Yes, this time there's nothing about lana del rey!)
you know those people who humiliate themselves for others? Who do everything for someone specific to love them, try to talk to them even if it's unhealthy, or beg them to stay in their lives. (yes, it's quite depressing and sad)
i haven't been like that much in life, usually when someone didn't care about me, i cared even less about them. but I won't lie, there have been situations where I may have humiliated myself a little, but it's human.
anyway, going straight to my analogy, let's imagine that you struggling to manifest something is a friend "Cassie," and the manifestation will be her ex-boyfriend, okay? (i swear it will make sense in the end)
what I write outside the parentheses is Cassie's situation, and what's inside the parentheses is possibly the situation you're going through on your manifestation journey.
okay, you have this friend Cassie who keeps saying that her ex-boyfriend doesn't care about her, doesn't respond to messages, and shows no signs, and she's going crazy and desperate about it (just like you when you see no progress in your manifestation). so she does EVERYTHING to get him back (just like you when you try multiple methods non-stop and feel needy). and as Cassie's friend, you think, "poor cassie, she doesn't deserve to suffer like this" (and she really doesn't deserve it, just as you don't deserve to suffer for your manifestations). there are also moments when she sends a message for you saying, "I'll forget him this time, I promise." but after two days, she's there messaging him again (just like you affirm on the first day all motivated and trying to convince yourself that this time your manifestation will come true, but after a few days, you see no progress and start panicking), and then she gets very sad because she thinks they will never get back together and she will never be happy with him again (just like you think you can't manifest anything, that the universe hates you, that you will never get what you want, that the loa doesn't work). But meanwhile, there are other people out there getting back with their exes and you admire them, wondering what it would be like if it were you... (just like when you look at other people's success stories and think "why can't I do it?") spoiler: You can do it too, honey. If everyone else can do it, so can you. Wake up.
If I were Cassie's friend, I would tell her to STOP acting like that and start valuing herself and just distract herself. because let's be honest, men ALWAYS come back, right? 🤣 and many people may disagree with me on this and think that if she doesn't chase after the guy, he won't come either. but that's how it works for me, even before I started using the law. every time I started valuing myself and stopped begging for others' love, the person came to me. so let's agree with my thinking on this, okay?
and one more point that I think is worth mentioning is that if Cassie really doesn't want to do this alone, maybe a manifestation coach would be a good idea (if it were a real situation, I would suggest her to seek a therapist). There are nuances about "manifestation coaches," I honestly don't use them and I recommend working on your self-concept. but it's an option if you want, but please do thorough research and find a trustworthy one.
returning, what can you do to not be another Cassie? I'm telling you to stop doing whatever you're doing to try to achieve your desire? no. just get out of the state of neediness and desperation, like a Cassie. you don't need that, my love. you don't need to worry, "Is my manifestation coming?" You don't need to use a thousand methods because you don't think it's enough. whatever you believe will bring your desires, will indeed bring your desire. If you believe that jumping three times, building a castle, and kicking an elderly person will give you what you want, guess what? If you do all that, then you will get what you desire. and if you believe that affirming once in your life will get you a beachfront mansion, guess what? you will achieve that.
so, to not be a Cassie:
1 - trust what you're saying, please trust yourself. nnow that ONLY WHAT YOU THINK is the truth, and it will be. (my last long post talks about this exactly, I highly recommend it, okay).
2 - take your desire off the pedestal. your desire may be your biggest dream in life, I don't care. take it off the pedestal. the powerful person who can have anything they want is YOU, not your desire. tou are a thousand times greater than your desire. you don't chase after your desire, your desire chases after you. you know when manifestation coaches tell you to start manifesting just a blue butterfly or a candy? well, it's because for you, that's not difficult. It's something you find easy to manifest and know it's totally possible to have. but you can literally manifest a Porsche at the same speed as manifesting an ice cream, okay? take your desire off the pedestal; you are fully capable of having it.
3 - get out of the state of lack. In the law of assumption, some people talk a lot about states and some manifest just by being in the state of the wish fulfilled and ready, they succeed. but the state of lack is literally when you feel the lack, the absence of your desire. you don't feel like you have it or you don't feel worthy of it, so you probably fall into a spiral of despair with millions of thoughts like "what will I do if I don't achieve it?" "I don't see any progress" "time is passing and I don't have my results". Anyway,
- But what do I do to heal my state of lack?
just don't be in it 💐💐💐 yes, it's easy, okay. please believe that it's easy and it will be. I know it's very easy to affirm when you're motivated, especially after reading a success story. but motivation doesn't last forever and I don't think it's healthy for you to keep restoring your motivation by reading success stories all the time. there's nothing wrong with it, but you don't need success stories to heal. every time you feel like you're entering the state of lack, start trusting yourself. when it happens to me, I start affirming "none of this, I have my desires" "I don't care about what my 3D shows me" "I have what I want", I also imagine myself with my desire as if I really have it now. I'll admit, there are times when I start affirming this to avoid entering the state of lack and at first it feels like I'm feeling wrong, the feeling of hopelessness even. but regardless of how I feel, I keep visualizing and eventually start feeling strong and motivated again. in those moments, you have to be strong and disciplined with yourself, okay? you can do it.
4 - try not to care about time or the 3D reality. i know it's difficult, but please live in your imagination and believe that if you have it in your imagination, you have it now. about time, it depends, okay? Some people manifest in seconds because they believe they can, while others manifest in weeks because they think it takes weeks. if you're the second type of person, you can definitely manifest in seconds if you allow yourself to do so. self-concept affirmations help a lot in this aspect. Just don't worry about time in the 3D reality. If you know that in your mind you have your desire NOW, then you have it now. once you're fully living in your imagination, it will come in the 3D reality. I know it's difficult, but just trust yourself and your mind. I promise that if you live 100% in your mind, your desire can come very quickly.
5 - distract yourself! don't spend the whole day thinking about your desire. usually, the desire comes when you accept that you have it and continue living your life. I know it's complicated, especially when it's something you want, but distract yourself to avoid excessive and negative thoughts about your manifestations. and please get off tumblr for a while
6 - improve your self-concept, please. Just do that, and your manifestation journey will be much easier.
I think that's it for today. I talked a lot as always 😛😛
I usually don't respond to people asking for help here on my blog (mainly because I don't receive any requests) but if you're having problems, you can send me a message, and I'll respond ❤🩹 I just want to help someone like loa bloggers helped me when I needed it. good night everyone, and stay hydrated.
#law of assumption#master manifestor#void state#mentaldiet#neville goddard#selfconcept#success story#voidstate#loa motivation#loa#loa blog#living in the end#affirm and persist#affirmations#affirmyourreality#law of attraction#manifestation#affirmdaily#dream life#successstories#manifestation coach#self concept#loa tumblr
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WITH YOU.
– Crhis Sturniolo angst (happy ending).
chris x f!reader.
Author's note: It's been so long since I've written something and I am s o r r y but I will never stop loving 'angst'. So you have to suffer with me too. It's l o n g and I haven't checked for any typos, so if I do have any, excusez-moi.
Warnings: Depression, mood swings, Chris is smoking, could be triggering to some, please do not read if it could affect you. ♡
Summary: Chris is so obsessed with you that he suggests you should break up for a bit now that he's leaving to study abroad (just the thought of other people being around you while he can't, seemed impossible to him). When he does, he realises what a mistake that was.
—
I stare down at my phone for a little bit and the screen goes off a few seconds later. I do not know how to feel or what to do, but I do know a small tear just runs down my cheek. Matt just called me – he said that Chris hasn't left his room in days; they're worried.
"Chris, are you serious?" I can feel my chest getting heavier with every second that passes.
"What the hell do you want me to think? What else is there to do?!" he explodes – his hands are buried in his hair and he gets up from the bed, "it's not easy for me either, but seriously! I can't fucking stand the thought of you being away from me.. I just can't do it. I will go crazy." he doesn't stay in place, he keeps moving anxiously, "what if.. someone flirts with you, what if you forget me while I'm away, so many what ifs – I just can't do this, I'm already fucking obsessed with you."
"Well, same goes for me, Chris! What are you saying then? We should just break up because you decided you wanted to study abroad?" I get up from the bed as well and I see him turning his back to me, his hands pressed against the wall in front of him.
"I didn't just 'decide' to fucking leave you! You know it's always been my dream to leave this goddamn place and study abroad!" he's almost screaming now and I want to hit the walls, I want to kick the doors, I want to grab him and never let him leave.
Instead, I grab his stuff and put them in his backpack, not being able to see clearly from all the tears that threaten to leave my eyes.
"What are you doing?" he sounds a little calmer now but I can feel my skin burning from all the anger, the sadness, everything all at once.
"Leave." is all I say before I throw his backpack outside my room and I turn around, not wanting to see him actually leave.
"Babe–" he starts but I quickly turn around, "leave!" I am shouting now.
Before he can say anything, I push him outside of my room and close the door behind him. And then, I break down. The heaviest weight is on my chest and it makes it so, so hard to breathe. The tears fully blurry my vision now and I almost pass out from how hard I am crying.
Two weeks have passed after that incident and yet, I can still feel that weight on my chest, let alone now.. after Matt's call. We did break up but that doesn't mean I automatically stop caring about him. I will always love him, whether he is in my life or not.
I start getting worried so I don't waste any time – I grab my phone and my bag, and with that, I quickly leave to go to Chris' house. While I'm in the car, I can't stop crying, Matt's words are on repeat in my head.
"I.. I don't know what to do.. we don't know what to say to him, he won't say anything to us.." Matt's voice is almost trembling and it's the only time I've ever heard him this worried.
"Matt, I just.. I am not sure if I can help after–" he cuts me off, pleading, "I know you guys broke up but please. We're begging you."
And here I am. Already outside their house, tears streaming down my face. I grab my stuff and before I can wipe away all the tears, the door opens and I'm met with two arms around me.
"We apologise for bringing you all the way here, we're just.. worried.." Nick says and I hug him back. I tell him it's fine and rub his back.
"Guys.. could I ask you a favor?" they both nod at the same time, "could you.. just leave for a bit? Once I make sure he is okay, I will call you straight away."
"Of course. Yes. We'll go grab a coffee. Tell us if you need anything." I nod and they both come closer to me, placing a kiss on both of my cheeks and I can't help but smile.
I leave my stuff on their couch and without a second thought, I immediately walk up the stairs, where Chris' room is. I knock on his door, even though I know he won't answer but I do anyway. I call his name – this is the only time I can actually hear something behind this big, wooden door. I say his name again. The door opens slowly and my heart breaks into pieces.
My beautiful Chris – he looks exhausted. He stands there with his usual gray hoodie, his pyjamas, his hair is a literal mess and there are eye bags under his beautiful eyes. I can see smoke coming out of the room, he smells like it as well – he's been smoking.
"What.. are you doing here?" his voice is hoarse, his eyes are so red, it makes want to cry even more.
"Why are you scaring me like that?" my voice is calm but my bottom lip is quivering.
"I'm sorry.." he says, although I'm not sure if he knows what he's apologizing for, "where's Matt and Nick?"
"They let me in and then I asked them to leave." I say but all I wanna do is hug him.
"Thank you.. uhm, come inside.. if you want." he mutters and attempts to fix his hair as he lets me into his room. I only see bottles of water here and there, I can also see burnt cigarettes all over his desk, there are clothes on the floor, journals scattered all around. His room is a mess, "sorry." he whispers.
"It's fine.." I say under my breath, and honestly, I don't know what to say to him. All I want to do is hug him and kiss him, and I would, but I am still hurt, too.
"You didn't have to come here." he murmurs and takes another cigarette in his mouth, lighter in his other hand. It's like he read my mind because he immediately opens his mouth to speak again, "you don't need to feel sorry for me. I'll be fine."
There's not much I can say to him, but I do move closer to him. He is seated at the edge of his bed and I am now in front of him, looking down at him. I slowly grab the cigarette, pulling it away from him and after I throw it in the ashtray, I pull him in for a big hug. He stays still for a few seconds but I can feel his arms wrapping around my waist just a few seconds later. His head is pressed against my tummy and I have my fingers buried into his hair.
"Do you know how scared I was to hear that you haven't left your room in days?" I whisper and I try hard not to let the tears run down my cheeks once again. I can hear him sniffling and my heart breaks all over again.
He doesn't say anything and I lean down to leave a kiss on the top of his head, "I am sorry I hurt you. I am just.. I thought that was the solution, but it obviously wasn't." he whispers and I can feel my shirt getting wet.
"I hurt you too, and I am sorry. I know how much you want to leave, I shouldn't be selfish. I just can't be away from you." a big tear leaves my eye and I squeeze him in my arms a little bit, "neither can I." he says as he looks up at me.
"Chris.. this is very hard for me, but if it means you'll get to chase your dreams.. then fuck it. I need to see you chasing your goals, I need to know you're happy." I get down on my knees in between his legs and I cup his cheeks, "and if we're meant to be, then we sure will in the future." with every word, it's like I'm stabbing myself over and over again. My hearts cries but my mind knows exactly what it has to do.
He looks at me with those blue eyes, uncontrollable tears falling from them and I just want to kiss them away, "I cannot believe you just said that.." he says, but he doesn't look hurt, if anything, he looks more.. in love?
He grabs my cheeks and pulls me closer, pressing his forehead against mine – his tears fall onto my skin as he wipes away mine, "come with me."
My heart stops. My eyes widen and in pretty sure I look a little crazy, "what?"
"Come with me. Let's move in together. Like we always said we would do when we grow up – now's the time. Come with me." he says and I can finally see a little smile behind that constant frown, "you can decorate our apartment. You can have as many plants as you want inside, you can watch all these fucking horror movies that you like to watch and I won't complain, ever! Please."
Our apartment. I feel like passing out, right here.
"Promise me you'll make up for all the damage you've done to yourself these past few weeks and I swear, I'll go pack my things right now." I whisper against his lips, I cannot stop crying.
He cries too, but his smile is so big, I feel like the whole room is shining. He caresses my cheeks and leans in, placing his soft lips against mine – my heart beats faster than it ever did before, "I love you so much." he says.
Before I can even say anything, he pulls me into his lap so that I'm straddling his thighs and hugs me tightly, looking up at me, "I love you too, babe." I say and lean in for another kiss.
"Sorry I kicked your brothers out earlier."
He laughs and I can't help but laugh with him, "it's okay, they'll be fine. Now come here, I've missed you."
#sturniolo fanfic#nicolas sturniolo#christopher sturniolo#nick sturniolo#chris sturniolo#matt sturniolo#sturniolo triplets#one-shot#angst#fluff#chris sturniolo angst#chris sturniolo fluff#fanfic#matthew sturniolo
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A little headcannon that has been stewing in my head for a while and has absolutely no proof from the cannon
Death has wings right? What if Dream used to have wings too but when his kingdom got invaded for the first time(that story he tells in the Overture) the invaders cut his wings off. That's the part of the reason why he crafted his helm and why's he so dependent on it. They took his wings so he took their skull and a spine, an eye for an eye kind of situation. Also, that's when Dream first started employing a raven. He still has scars on his shoulder blades that follow him to any form he takes. He's ashamed of them, sees them as a sign of weakness, a reminder of his failure and his flaws and goes to great lengths to cover them up. That's about it, but I'd love to hear what you think of it^-^
(Plus: Hob gently running his hands over the scars, showing Dream his own ones and reassuring him that there's nothing broken, or wrong with him)
NO BUT THIS IS SO ANGSTY I LOVE IT. i love suffering
i feel like a permanent injury like that would have to be done to dream's core essence, such as it is, rather than his 'physical form' - i don't know if dream's physical form in the waking world or other realms can even be hurt like that. it would have to be like, something that deeply wounds the dreaming, or the concept of dreaming, or just like the deepest core of dream as an 'entity' rather than it being a physical wound. (this is leading me on a mental tangent about injuries to large groups of dreamers also injuring dream, like, extinction events and such, but that's for another time).
you managed to rope me into it, congrats XD
content warning for blood, gore, violence, Things Done That Can't Be Undone, etc.
--
There is not much, in his long life and memory, that Dream is able to forget. Thoughts do not drift into irrelevancy, into the past, the way they do for humans. He is able to hold much, all at once, in the cavern of his mind, eons of all that has happened hovering close enough to touch. It is a heavy weight more often than it is an aid.
But he forgets, sometimes, with Hob.
With Hob, the rare points of their contact stand out as singularly bright stars in the nebula of Dream's existence. All else within him fades. When Hob takes his hand Dream feels clear as a desert sky, when Hob kisses him for the first time, Dream is floating free in a great salt lake, hanging weightless.
He forgets.
It's only after, bodies pressed together with pleasing heat and sweat-tackiness, Hob tracing patterns over his back, that Dream begins to remember again.
"Dream..." Hob's fingers stutter over his shoulder blades. His voice catches with the hesitance he has often displayed with Dream since their reunion. I think you're here for friendship. Dream feels the echoes.
He kisses Hob's throat, tastes the salt tang of his skin, hides his face away there. The weight of embodiment returning. "Ask your question," he says. "I swear not to part from you now."
"Is this from...?" Hob's fingertips dance up the raised arcs of scar tissue over his back. Pain sparkles in the wake of his touch like the sharpness of a hand-drawn tattoo in the permanence of its inking. As humans imagine it. Dream is not truly physical and could not bear such a mark. Except for this.
"No," he tells Hob. Blame for many of Dream's recent ordeals can be laid at Roderick Burgess's feet, but not this one. "Much older than that."
"Oh." Hob keeps tracing the scar over Dream's right shoulder blade. The touch aches deep in Dream's being where those wounds originate, but he does not tell Hob to stop. Even like this, Hob's hands bring him back, and back, and keep him here.
Hob is waiting, leaving an opening for him to elaborate. Dream is not yet sure whether he wishes to.
"It is not a pretty story," he says.
Hob strokes through his hair. Dream keeps his head tucked under his chin and so feels each word as it's spoken. "Neither of us is a pretty story, darling. Tell it if you want to."
Dream has not spoken of this in many years. There are those in the Dreaming who have served him for millennia whom he has not told. He has taken lovers, had them see the scars during their lovemaking, and still not relayed the story.
"When I was young," he begins, "and still coming into my power, the Dreaming was invaded. My borders were not as strong, then. My realm, less populated. Ancient beings, older than I was at the time, hungered for my realm. Sought its power for their own."
"Older than dreams?" Hob asks.
"In their universe, there were no dreams," Dream tells him. "Perhaps it is what drew them to me."
"Alright. Wow." Hob sounds thoughtful. He rubs Dream's back, between his shoulder blades where it doesn't hurt. "Go on, love."
"I fought them. But the collective unconscious of this universe was young and undeveloped, as was I; I had not mastered all elements of my domain. I fought, but inelegantly, and struggled to counter dreamless beings when all my power was in the unconscious. They were wholly anchored in the present; I, in the space between seconds; we were poorly suited as combatants."
"What did you do?" Hob asks, quiet. He can sense, Dream thinks, the direction this is going, that Dream would not be so hesitant to tell the story of scars born of victory.
"I did not know," Dream admits, equally quiet, still shamed by it, his own failure, and its branching repercussions, "what to do. And the Eldest God, he who had first rent open the walls of my realm, pounced on my uncertainty, captured me, held me--"
The memory, never forgotten, always just within reach should he turn towards it, rises again -- the silk-smooth black sand on the shores of the Dreaming, crushed into his cheek; the warm waters lapping at his mouth, nose, eyes, drowning him; the impossible weight on his spine of the impossible dreamless creature holding him down, arms wrenched behind his back, the feral animal growl that had escaped him, the equally animal panic beating under his ribcage, the fragile spun dreamstuff of him held in the sharptoothed maw of cold reality, his wings--
"Dream?"
Dream comes back to himself. Comes back to Hob. The overwarm flannel sheets. The soft press of Hob's body. He's tapping something on Hob's arm, and hadn't realized he was doing it. It's the rhythm of an old song from before the time of men, the electrical beats passed along root chains from tree to tree to tree, all the way across the great forests that now exist only in scarce patches on the earth.
Dream shifts ever closer to Hob's body, slips a knee between Hob's thighs to tangle them, bare skin to bare skin, limb to limb, root to root.
"I had wings, then," he says.
--his wings, flapping frantically in the face of the thing that pinned him, feathers catching and tearing on jagged armor, held to the ground the way a creature of flight was never meant to be--
"Oh," breathes Hob. He touches the long scar over Dream's shoulder blade again and pauses there. The pain catches the story to Dream again like a hook and holds it there as he continues bleeding it dry.
"The Eldest God dug his claws into me and tore the wings from my body." Dream's voice doesn't shake but he does not manage more than a whisper. "I am not a physical creature, Hob, understand this, I cannot be so easily harmed, it was not a physical form that was damaged, rather, the Old Gods came from stone and earth and it was stone they harnessed as their claws, ancient stone to carve into my being and tear out my wings from the essence of me, root and stem, flesh and bone, air and feather and starlight."
All of this comes out in a continuous rush, and Hob kisses the side of his head, says, "Breathe."
He can still feel, if he but thinks back, the tearing of the claws. A cold so bright it felt like burning. His face ground into the sand to muffle his scream, the howling whiteout of pain overtaking all other noise, the crack of his shoulder joint as it was broken. Star stuff spilling out over the sand - Dream hadn't even known he could bleed until then. Hands that should never have touched in the first place releasing him. Collapsing, disarmed, to the ground. Every limb on fire, the ones that were left.
"Dream."
He lost himself, and found himself again some time later curled in the shallows of the Dreaming sea, seeking shelter from the cold in the warm waters. Face half submerged, breathing as much salt water as air. Blood still spooling around him like leftover paint whirling in a water glass.
"Dream."
Even in those warm waters, he was shivering. Dream doesn't think he's ever been quite warm since; that cold latched itself in him somewhere and never left.
Hob's voice, now, against his ear. He's curled himself around Dream while Dream wasn't paying attention, Dream's back to the warm protection of Hob's chest. "You don't have to finish if you don't want to."
Dream will not leave a story unfinished, not even one such as this. "When I had regained my strength enough to fight back," he continues, "I was... not in control. I knew only survival. If the Old Gods had wished me to understand their world, they succeeded. I abandoned my powers and fought with my hands and my claws and my teeth, and I tore the Eldest God's skull and spine from his body. Both of us would be maimed, I thought; if he would have my dreams then I would have for my own the backbone upon which he held his earth. I listened to him scream. I watched each rib pry up from his chest and snap, my hands slick with his blood, his with mine, and felt nothing but the raw satiation of a wolf setting upon meat. I have told you, Hob." He takes his first breath in a while and feels it rattle, hollow, around his ribcage. "It is not a pretty story."
"No." Hob's hand finds Dream's against his middle, tangles their fingers, holds him. His breath is shaky in Dream's hair, words more so. "No, darling, it's not. I'm sorry."
They rewrote the story of the Dreaming, Dream recalls saying to Destiny, after. Before he had come to know, truly, what Destiny was. Kneeling in his garden, blood still draping his raw back like a shroud, Dream had sought meaning, answers, reason. Foolish, in retrospect, to even consider asking for succor.
Destiny had said that the Dreaming had seeped too far into the Waking world. That what had happened was a necessary rebalancing.
Had Dream not been forbidden from physical violence against his siblings, he would have bitten off one of Destiny's hands with his own sharp teeth and asked if he felt more balanced then.
"Now you know what vicious creature you lie with, Hob Gadling," Dream says. The words are heavy in his throat, but he can't find it in himself to slip from Hob's hold. Now you know the jagged turn at the beginning of my story.
He wonders, sometimes, what the Dreaming might have been like had it continued on the other branch of Destiny's forking path. What he might have been like. There is so much space between a winged creature and a once-winged creature. The entire sky.
"I know." Hob bites at the back of Dream's neck, light but sharp, then kisses that same spot. The nip of pain is unexpectedly soothing. Hob too knows what it is to bite and claw and writhe and maul. “I know. I’ve known your darkness, honey. Don’t you worry.”
“They fled me,” Dream tells him. “The Old Gods. After. I did not understand why at the time.” He had stood, bloodied, shaking, over their Eldest one, bones grasped in his hands, and watched them disappear. These beings that could still have shredded the Dreaming and swallowed it, but chose to run. “Now, I imagine it is like the way men will flee from an animal that is so much smaller than them but has gone rabid. The wrongness. The danger of irreparable madness. They saw me ruined and wished not to catch it, saw the Dreaming—”
This wound has dulled over time and become but a throbbing ache at the base of his skull, a reminder of something missing. But it never disappears.
“The Dreaming, changed, from what they had wanted.”
Dream’s back has never been quite right, since. His anatomy is meant for two sets of joints, not one. But it is only a fitting marker of the permanent damage done that day.
“Changed?” says Hob, so gentle now, lips brushing his skin.
“There was once more,” Dream says. “The collective unconscious was once more… collective.”
“Wait. D’you mean…?”
“Yes. There was more interconnection between minds when I was young. There were not human minds in the sense that you would know them, not yet. But there was communication, and knowing, back then.”
Vestiges of it still linger. In the vast underground networks of the trees, the paired spins of distant atoms. The matched steps of lovers finding perfect synchronicity in a dance. But—
“That was sundered with my wings.”
The cold that had washed over Dream when that realization hit had been worse than the pain of losing the wings in the first place. How he had failed the dreamers under his care. Let things fracture and tear and separate when they were meant to be together.
Hob sighs against the back of his neck. “I’m so sorry, Dream.”
“I am sorry,” Dream says. “It should never have happened.”
“No, it shouldn’t,” Hob agrees, and it’s sweet pain sliding between Dream’s ribs, for Hob to press his fingertips to the rawness of him and say, yes, failure, failure, I see it now.
But Hob kisses the point of his shoulder, the ever-tense muscles of his upper back, the hard curve of his scapula and the calcified line of another almost-joint, lost to time. His lips find the uneven scar tissue and press there, which is its own sweet pain, but sliding towards sweet, a sharp bite to kissed lips.
“It shouldn’t,” Hob whispers, and the words vibrate to the core of him. Hob does not see his failure, will not; Dream had forgotten Hob’s charity towards him, how he will see the blood on Dream’s hands and wipe it away instead of asking how it got there. Dream’s failures have stolen something from him he does not even know to miss, and still.
Now Dream does wish for Hob’s hands slipping under his ribs. Hob would find the aching wretched thing within him that had been loosed that day and hold it in his palms, wash the blood from it with careful strokes. Would that Hob could have held him then, submerged him deep in the waters of the Dreaming sea until the dark and the warmth and the strong hold of his arms had soothed the flayed and violated creature that Dream had become back to sanity. Before the gnashing rageful part of him had turned predator and fully grown its claws.
Perhaps there is succor to be found, after all. How quickly Hob Gadling has become it.
“I wish that I could have…” Hob sighs. It sounds mournful, longing. “I don’t even know. Helped you. Held you. Futile, I know.”
“I would not have you feel badly. It is long past and cannot be undone,” Dream says, as if Hob’s words don’t mean more to him than he could possibly know.
“Nothing can, sweetheart,” Hob says. His hair brushes Dream’s shoulders. It is terribly soft now, in this day and age. Dream suspects it was not always so. Human lives have rarely been soft on their bodies. He appreciates the softness of Hob’s body now, and how it cradles him. Dream himself has long been unchangeably hard-edged. “But I would still help you.”
“Sweetheart,” Dream repeats. Dream might have been sweet, once, at the end of a different story. “You would call me this, at the end of this tale?”
Hob turns him so they are facing each other once more. A tear has gathered in the corner of his eye, and slips down to wet his pillowcase as Dream watches. Tears for Dream. Warm salt water. He smiles at Dream anyway.
“You’re my sweetheart. My dear one. You think I would think anything about this other than sadness for you?”
“Dear one,” Dream echoes. “Always good to me, my Hob.”
“‘Course.” Hob squeezes his hand. Hands that too have known violence, but soft for Dream, always. “Is there anything I can do for you? Anything at all?”
“Only what you have already done,” Dream says. “Be a cavern where I can shelter from the cold.”
Hob kisses him, hot and lingering, and pulls the blankets up over their heads.
#thanks for sending this anon i'm extremely obsessed with it now#thinking about young dream still new to the world building the dreaming for the first time and learning his powers and still full#of softness and wonder and getting ripped to shreds for it#and now i am Screaming#dream of the endless#hob gadling#dreamling#my writing#ask#anonymous#tw gore#tw blood#fuck i did this while i'm supposed to be working so i should really get back to that now. adios
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Transgender Visibility Day Two: Estrogenic Boobaloo
Alternatively,
Transgender Visibility Day Two: Testosteronic Dickaloo
It is now Transgender Visibility Day for the other half of the world!
Let us celebrate, but firstly before anything else. The council would like to give out a few statements.
While this is an amazing celebration of our resilience and continued resistance to transphobia, we mustn't forget
Our fallen, the many killed in hate unjustly. Nex Benedict being one of the most recent
Our fellow queer in Palestine, Sudan, the Congo, etc. We mustn't forget about their suffering whilst we celebrate here so freely. Though we should care about all of the people not just the queer and trans in those places being subjected to the most inhumane conditions by tyrants.
The many bills, laws, and legislation trying to be passed to further erase us. Especially the KOSA bill, and quite sadly in Florida recently having passed legislation to ban minors from social media as an attack on us to be put in to effect in 2025.
With all of those being said, we should all continue to fight for those causes, continue fighting censorship. Continue fighting genocide. Continue fighting slavery.
We ask you all to continue spreading the word of these causes, these evils that must be stopped. As the council is bound by metaphysical law, we may not exit this and help you in the way we wish.
Fight KOSA, and censorship
Fight for our fallen, whether it's the unjustly banned, those dead from self harm, or those murdered in cold blood
Fight for those still persisting, the ones showing a fervour of resistance to fight oppresors.
We draw our strength from solidarity, it is what has allowed us to continue. Let it be the reason we win this war.
Anyways, here is our second message to all Transgender beings out there:
You are valid, you know you best. And we mean it. We may be filled with wise wizards, but we know that only oneself knows itself best. You know your identity better than anyone. Even when it can feel like your body disagrees with your true self, or others don't see you for who you are.
Know that even with all the pain, the grief, the hate, we and many many others fight every second for you to be you. For you to be safe. For all of us to be ourselves.
And we will see that day come, and by that day we hope for all of us to have survived, to tell stories of our battles, to guide a new generation of queers.
We just ask you continue being you, and being safe, and you will see that day come we guarantee. Even if it doesn't seem like it.
This world is a dark room covered in oil, we are a small candle of hope. And when it seems too dark, our hope will light the room with a burning fervour. To free us from this room. To burn down our prison.
We love you and appreciate you for who you are, please continue as you're the only one of you.
"in the dark we endure, and in the light we fight for who you call impure"
happy transgender visibility day
- The Queer Wizard Council <3 <2
@skyethebisexualwolfwizard
@im-a-wizard-who-dont-crime
@thebutterflyoficeandwisteria
@bisexualchemistry
@sassy-piece-of-parsley
@flirtyambiguouswizard
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@aroace-wizard
@serious-tabaxi
@agentldiddy
@parkyrtheelvishbard
@autistic-dinos-and-dragons-lover
@a-goose-in-a-trenchcoat
@sapphicdragons-3
@transgender-wizard
@jhomikle
@cynical-artificer
@anne-androgynous-android
@asheslab
@luminethefoxincabin13-ts
@incrediwizard
@amethyst-aster
@ash-the-tiefling
@shittest-wizard-ever
@bi-gender-sorcerer
@somecallmekay
@be-gentle-with-littluns
@ladyofspoons
@slymewitch
@alchemical-overreaction
@frogpantsthebloodgod
@yourlocalbreadenthusiast
@mango-lord-of-poison
@detectivewizzard
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@lixorloveslicorice
@hyper-lynx
@chaos-wizard-nyehehe
@song-de-lune
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@so-um-brasileiro
#wizardposting#wizardblr#wizard council#queer wizard council#qwc#trans#transgender#trans rights#transgender rights#trans day#transgender day#transgender visibility day#transmasc#transfem#lgbt#lgbtq#lgbtqia rights#lgbtq community#lgbtq rights#lgbt pride#gazaunderattack#all eyes on rafah#eyes on rafah#palestine genocide#gaza genocide#free gaza#from the river to the sea#queer#lgbtqia
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More self indulgence Genshin impact. I'm going start backing up my Genshin writing on AO3 because I'm really enjoying this lol and want to make more. Please be kind to me, I'm not a "fanfic writer" I'm just sharing this because I find it fun.
Brief synopsis of what this is: Mine/your first meeting with the Fontaine siblings. I just straight up include my name here so if you're also a Sarah you'll get extra enjoyment from this. Lyney suffering from love at first sight lol. A really cute paragraph of Freminet. In my little sagau fantasy this takes place after the game has ended, so just assume Lumine and Aether are reunited and everything major is resolved. OH! And female reader and no smut here, just Lyney being infatuated with you.❤
Sorry I feel like I'm talking too much, I'm new to this🙇♀️
love Love LOVE the idea of sagau Lyney...being being like a little nervous/awkward around you God the same could go for Heizou
But love the idea of cool, suave, a bit aloof Lyney stumbling over his words and cheeks dusting pink as soon as he sees you the new goddess of Tayvet. Just love the picture of Lyney getting all shy and nervous around you cause he's so taken aback by your beauty and kindness.
Ok so like picture this. You've been the goddess of Teyvat for like weeks now. You've already visited most of your favorites from Mondstadt, Liyue, Sumeru. So you're like "Furina I wanna visit Fontaine next" and she's super excited, starts planing out your entire schedule for your days there. And you say "I wanna see one of Lyney's famous magic shows :)" and she's like "Of course of course right after we see the trial of a double homicide we'll do that."
But like you would think its a bit rude to just show up to his show without introducing yourself first. So you send Lyney and his siblings a letter telling them in week you'll be in Fontaine seeing one of their shows and that you're going arrive early so you can introduce yourself before the show starts.
(I just love the mental image of the three siblings huddled around each other as Lyney reads off the letter whose sender is the goddess herself.)
So um next scene right. Lyney is fidgeting with putting his gloves on, his right hand a little shaky and his eyes obviously lost in thought. "Nervous?" his sister's voice startles him from his deep thoughts. "I haven't seen you this nervous before a show in many years. Its because she's going be in the audience isn't it?" Lynette bluntly points out. Lyney swiftly tries to regain his usual demur as he smoothly pulls the glove on his hand. "Of course not, I'm more concerned about Lady Furina. You know what happened the last time she was at one of our shows." And after Lynette drops the topic Lyney is low key wondering if he should double check his props, least he make a fool of himself in front of you.
As the minutes tic by you arrive early as promised. You insist Furina doesn't follow you backstage to greet the siblings with you, she dramatically sighs and tells you not to take too long.
And as your eyes meet the three siblings(as you insisted Freminet be there too) they immediately take a low bow before you. Your eyes bright and smile beaming at seeing them together for the first time.
"Its an honor to have you in attendance this evening ma dame" Lyney gracefully speaks first.
"There's no need to be so formal with me. Please call me Sarah." The smile on your face never leaving for a second as your eyes quickly bounce between Lyney and Lynette before saying "Wow you two really do look alike."
You don't forget about Freminet. Turning to him and patting his head gently. Causing poor little shy Freminet to lose his voice. "Ah I have a small gift for you Freminet." you tell him as you pull out a small gift box for the boy. "Open it." And as his shaky hands do its revealed to be a small doll automata. "You like it?" you smile back at him. But Freminet's heart is racing too quickly for him to process what is happening. He glances down at the doll then back at you and repeats this movement again and again. He can not comprehend how he was just handed a personalized gift from the goddess herself, let alone she just touched his head. His cheeks a bright red, he nods, keeping his gaze to the floor. "I'm glad." you say sweetly as you pat his head once more. Freminet continues to gaze at the doll as if he was just gifted a holy relic.
You greet Lynette with a short hug, arms around her shoulders. She doesn't dare push you away and the faintest pink blush on her cheeks is quite endearing to see. "We have to get together for tea sometime." You tell her. "There's still so many tea flavors in Teyvat I haven't tried yet. Promise me you'll brew me your favorite." And with a shy nod she agrees.
As Lyney sees you embrace his sister he assumes(no hopes) you'll do the same with him. And he's not disappointed when you turn to him and wrap him in a brief hug. His hand hovers close to your waist but decides against touching out of respect. When you pull away, but faces still close he gets a clear image of your eyes and oh wow he can see stars in them. Swirling colors of blues and violets mixing together he finds himself staring a little too long. You giggle. "Photos can't do you justice Lyney you're even more handsome in person." Lyney's eyes sparkle at your unexpected compliment, his heart skipping a beat. "Oh on the contrary mon cheri, I could have never have guessed such a stunning beauty was behind your letter." Lyney smoothly retorts, making you bashfully giggle again. And he wonders how many more times he can pull that reaction from you. Your conversation remains short but full of excitement. Lyney's eyes remain shamelessly transfixed on you.
You give the three one last sweet smile and a little wave goodbye before you turn to return to Furina, who is giving you the saddest puppy eyes saying "That took way too long."
Lynette, with her eyes in a rare soft daze looks at her hands before muttering "...She's nice." Lyney's gaze follows you as you descend the main stage back to an disappointed Furina. His heart racing from just this short interaction with you. If he had any doubts about the divine they were certainty gone by your kind presence. He becomes determined to learn more about you. A slight pink dusts his pale skin and his eyes remain locked on you as he speaks "When Sarah and Furina come backstage after the show we should invite them out to a meal with us."
Lynette's focus is now back on her brother. "What? Why would they do that?"
A mischievous glint shines in Lyney's eyes before he opens up his left palm to reveal a pearl earring.
Ah Lynette shouldn't expect any less of small trickery from her brother. She sighs "That was a bit unnecessary don't you think." And Lyney just laughs proud of himself.
At the end of the show when you and Furina are about to leave the opera house, of course you notice your beloved earring is missing. Furina dramatically gasps "Do you want me to order the staff to turn this whole place upside down for you your Grace?" "No no." You reassure her. "Let's just retrace our steps."
And you're very grateful when Lyney hands the earring back to you claiming to have spotted it on the ground after you walked away. His attention completely on you as soon as you came into view. "Thank you again Lyney, I'll try to see you again later this-"
"Would you like to join us for dinner tonight Sarah?" Lyney confidently asks without missing a beat. "To show our gratitude for attending our show."
Your gaze shifts to Lynette who shows no disagreement to her brother's proposal.
You agree and the four of you(as Furina refuses to leave your side until your head hits the pillow tonight) have a lavish five course meal at one of the most expensive cafes in the city. You try to spread your attention over the three of them equally, even encouraging Lynette to chime in as to not leave her out of the conversation. And as Furina dominates the conversation again you cant help but feel a set of eyes on you. In fact you've been feeling them on you all night. Its Lyney who not so sneakily can't help but be transfixed on you even when you're not the one speaking. Eyes soft and almost coy smile half hidden by him leaning on his hand.
As you mention you plan on spending time with Neuvillette, Lyney is secretly plotting on how to steal you away.
Hmm wonder what happens next...
#genshin sagau#genshin impact lyney#genshin impact#genshin impact fanfic#sagau#sagau x reader#self aware genshin#genshin impact sagau#genshin impact reader insert#genshin lyney#genshin impact fontaine#lyney and lynette#genshin impact freminet#female reader#genshin x you#genshin x reader#genshin x y/n#genshin impact x reader
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i would care if you talked about luffy's issues please talk please tell me all your takes, genuinely (< anon who enjoys your takes)
I am so thankful you asked me this because Luffy is genuinely one of my favorite characters of all time, especially when it comes to shonen protagonists. I'm always saying I don't like shonens (says the one that watches a lot of shonens) but that's mainly because the main characters never feel... Well-written enough for me to like them. But, well, One Piece is different. With all characters, really. It's one of the first shonens I watch that I genuinely love and enjoy because of the characters (shout out to Mob Psycho 100 being one of my favorite animes of all time too because of that same reason).
Luffy is a very complex character and I think that's why he gets mischaracterized most of the time when it comes to the fandom. Some people make him too dumb. Others make him too childish. Others make him way darker and more depressed than he truly is. And I'd say that's weird, having in mind how much the show talks about Luffy and is focused on Luffy's POV, but I kind of understand because people aren't used to characters that are both optimistic and realistic at the same time. Most of the time people consider an optimistic character to be completely idealistic (a good example here is Uta. She is idealistic because she's been sheltered for so long and thinks something as complex as the corruption in the world can be solved with a few songs and love) and refuse to acknowledge the fact that somebody with hopes and dreams can also understand (first-hand, even) the suffering within the world. People like extremes. They like to make both Law and Zoro extremely edgy. They like to babify Sanji and Koby. They forget about Nami's character depth to make her only "the mean lesbian" of the group (that term makes me so fucking furious you don't even know). Etc. Etc. Etc. The thing is: Luffy has layers. His personality varies. He's optimistic. He's realistic. He's stupid. He's emotionally intelligent. He's impulsive. He cares about the safety of the people around him. He's careless. He feels guilt. He's confident. He's so damn insecure. He's playful. He's the most serious character too. Etc. Etc. Etc.
What I want to say with all of this is that Luffy, despite being always perceived as this childish, dumb, and careless character within the fandom, has so much depth and trauma he deals with every fucking day. I once saw somebody saying Luffy is "not smart enough to understand the feeling of sadness" and I started laughing because what the fuck does that even mean. And... Is that person watching the same thing as me? Because the guy has suffered the injustice of the world so many times and so many losses that I can't even count them.
Basically: People portray Luffy as if he hadn't gone through any type of trauma when OP has shown countless times that he has been through a lot. A fucking lot. Perhaps it's the fact that he's the one hiding it all the time in the show, always replacing sadness with the need to be stronger so he doesn't feel like that ever again (aka protecting everyone so he doesn't lose anybody again. And not even in a selfish way to not be alone, although we could say that he does feel like that to some extent. But because his loved ones do not deserve to disappear or die in those ways and he feels guilty whenever it happens because every time, he says it's because he wasn't strong enough to protect them) and that's why most people don't realize how much pain he has gone through. But that's not a very valid argument because we have a lot of arcs that prove it otherwise (Sabaody, Marineford, Film Red, Wano...). So, yeah, I guess people just don't know how to read.
Starting through chronological order, I want to talk about his abandonment issues and savior complex that always seem to go hand in hand.
Luffy doesn't like to be alone. He's a very empathetic and extroverted person. He doesn't like to be bored, always loving the company of somebody else. But, sadly, he has always been kind of alone? People come and go for him all the time, and you can't tell me that doesn't affect him psychologically. He's 7 when he meets Uta and Shanks and the kid has never been more excited! That's when his dream of being a pirate begins and it's the first time he has a friend. A real friend, not just random animals he manages to find or older people that sometimes take care of him. Luffy gets bored easily, so of course, Shanks and Uta, being something new, make his life brighter. With dreams and new experiences and hope for a newer, better life outside his village. And then Uta and Shanks have to go, of course, and he stays all alone again. From what we've seen, the only thing Luffy did when they weren't around was just... Waiting for them to come back to him. That's it. Luffy's joy basically comes from being with people, and especially when he's fixated on somebody in particular, he doesn't let them go. Then they come back... But Uta is not with them anymore. That's Luffy's first heartbreak, in my opinion. It's when he decides that he has to be stronger. He loved Uta so damn much. She meant the world to him. And suddenly she isn't there, giving him no time to say goodbye, and... He only has Shanks. But Shanks refuses to tell him the truth about what happened with her. So here you go! It's the first time Luffy loses somebody this dear to him and the first time Shanks betrays him enough for him to get angry at his hero. He ends up accepting it, of course, but not because he has moved on, but because both Uta and Shanks told him to be stronger. More mature. And he forces himself to grow up faster because he wants something. He wants to know where his friend is, and if Shanks refuses to tell him because he's just a kid, then he'll just have to grow up and become stronger. To become a pirate and to keep the promise he made with Uta. The movies aren't canon so I just keep thinking about Luffy wondering where Uta is, and it breaks my heart every time.
Then Ace and Sabo appear in his life and... They are literally everything to him. I like Garp. He did what he could do. Kind of. But he leaves Luffy on his own with Ace under the care of some bandits (Dadan we love you, queen). So he can't really blame Luffy for the way he turned out to be, honestly. The thing is: Ace and Sabo are, again, something new to Luffy. They are not just friends. They are his brothers, now. We don't talk enough about Luffy's maturity and respect for other people's dreams even when he's just a kid. Luffy literally was kidnapped and beaten up and he didn't dare to say a word about Ace and Sabo's treasure because he respected their dream. He's loyal and understands other people's feelings and hopes perfectly. His empathy and emotional intelligence are just perfect. Then, well, you all know the story, but these two become the most important thing in Luffy's life, not only because they are his brothers, but because they are the representation of their dreams and future. And then it crashes into a million fucking pieces because of Celestial Dragons and classism and rich people quite literally saying "We are burning down the poor because they don't deserve to live! Woohoo!". And it's Luffy's first time realizing that the world is unfair and fucked up and that there are people that believe to be superior to others, a thing that Luffy fights against all the time.
So, Luffy learns that the world is extremely fucked up at a very young age. He has first-hand contact with the abuse rich people inflict on others, in every way. He suffers from the torture that is fighting for your life in the world of pirating and thieves when he's not even a pirate yet. He's just a kid. What the fuck. And then he loses Sabo. His older brother literally is killed by a celestial dragon and he can't do anything about it. He can only cry, of course, he's just a kid. What is he going to do? So he decides to become stronger. Because he feels weak in the hands of what is the injustice of the world. He feels trapped by that injustice, in my opinion, and wanting to be stronger is just the path to freedom. Because freedom means being able to save the people he cares about.
And here's the thing: Luffy's need to become stronger always comes from the guilt he feels after losing somebody, blaming himself even though he literally could have done nothing at the time to save Uta or Sabo. He has a severe savior complex, not to feel better about himself (although you could say that it would certainly fix his fear of being weak) but to not lose anybody else. For some reason he always feels responsible for the faith of the people he loves, he's constantly putting others first and sacrificing himself and then feeling guilty and weak when he can't save them when it wasn't even in his hands to save them in the first place.
Kid Luffy goes through a ton of stuff in his early years and the fear of being alone... Of losing somebody he cares about... It haunts him. He sees Shanks and piracy as the meaning of freedom and strength. It's just that simple for him: If he becomes a pirate, he'll be strong. If he's strong, he'll be free. If he's free, he'll never lose anybody again.
And yet, even if he's confident he'll manage to do this... He's still a kid. He's still a little brother. Ace's little brother. He depends on Ace, too, because that's the one person he has left. Ace promises him he won't die because he's just as confident, and says this as if Luffy was stupid for thinking something could happen to him. Not to get too into Ace's character right now, but the fact that he's constantly wondering if he should be alive to then realize Luffy needs him to stay alive... Is so damn beautiful.
And then he literally dies in front of Luffy. Protecting Luffy. And Oh, boy if that doesn't kill him... But that comes after Sabaody! After losing literally all of his crew! God, stop hurting this guy already for fuck's sake-
Long story short, Luffy manages to get a family. Not a crew. A family. He's not alone anymore, and he proves constantly that he won't let any of them go or die on him the way it happened with Uta and Sabo.
Water 7 is... Rough for Luffy, to say the least. Because it's the first time he sees everything he has built crumbling down. Robin is taken by the Marines. Usopp wants to leave the crew because he doesn't feel like he fits in, even though Luffy knows he is perfect for the family (Usopp just can't believe him because, you know, insecurities suck). And he has to learn how to be a captain. A true captain. He has to make the harsh decision of fighting his best friend and letting him go (his worst fucking fear) at the age of 17 because he's the captain. He has to be mature. And strong. And he definitely doesn't feel like those now. Not when Robin is also on her way to be executed.
Usopp is leaving. Robin might die. And it's just like Uta and Sabo all over again.
So, basically, Luffy grows up too fast. He grows up too fast, with the fear of abandonment and being weak, and the weight of being the captain of a whole crew resting on his shoulders. Besides, he fights against the world government for Robin because he refuses to let her die thinking she doesn't deserve/want to live, and it reminds me a lot of Ace's story. Ace doesn't think he deserves to live but then stays because he realizes that Luffy loves him and needs him. Robin, thanks to Luffy, realizes that she wants to live and that she has a new family to fight for.
Nobody dies and Usopp comes back this time, so everything ends up turning out fine after all! Yay!
Then Sabaody happens and I swear my guy can't have a fucking break.
Who has suffered more, Jesus Christ or Monkey D. Luffy from Sabaody to Marineford? I think we already know the answer.
He loses all of his crew. All at once. His worst fucking fear. They vanish right in front of his eyes and he can't do anything. He feels weak. He's shattered. Completely broken. But he's optimistic, still, because he believes in his crew and he knows they'll find a way to be together again! They've ben through a lot together, and they can find each other in a few days in Sabaody again. It's fine. But he has to delay it, of course, because his other biggest fucking fear is happening right now: Ace might die. His older brother might die.
So if you mix the trauma that caused him to have abandonment issues and a savior complex with the fact that Ace is the only sibling he has left and he is completely alone because his crew isn't by his side anymore... You get the most heartbreaking arc of the show! Awesome.
He does everything he can to save Ace. Ace complains about it, begging him to stay away from danger. And he refuses because he's his brother. He has to fight for him. And he does. And Ace dies anyway. Ace dies protecting him, too, and the hope that was left within him dies completely at that moment. Everything is shattered. His whole world is crumbling down. And I think that Luffy dies too at that moment.
For Luffy, losing Ace is not like losing a limb. Losing Ace is losing his everything. Ace meant the world to him. He was the representation of their dreams and hopes and past and future. He was the only person who knew Sabo like the back of his hand, too. And now Luffy is the only one carrying their souls. All alone.
That's probably Luffy's rock bottom. He doesn't think he deserves to be a pirate (or alive, either, but I don't want to get too deep into his suicidal thoughts I definitely think are a real thing because then this becomes too dark. But yeah. I think he does think about that too). He doesn't think he's strong enough. And he's completely broken.
There's this line from Fleabag that I absolutely adore: "I don't know what to do with it." / "With what?" / "With all the love I have for her. I don't know where to put it now."
Because Ace is gone. He's completely gone. And all the love Luffy has for him turns into grief and he doesn't know what to do anymore if Ace's soul isn't in the world to look after him. He doesn't know what to do if all the love and feelings he has for his brother go to waste. And it's his fault. Because he wasn't strong enough to protect him. Because he wasn't able to protect himself, Ace having to sacrifice himself for him. (And we know he feels guilty about this because he tells Sabo the second they meet again. He apologizes for not protecting Ace. He feels guilty about what happened still. And Sabo is just glad Luffy is okay because he knows his brothers too well to know already what happened).
Then our beloved Jinbe comes along (I love you. Please adopt me) and, following that quote of Fleabag: "I'll take it. No, I'm serious. It sounds lovely. I'll have it. You have to give it to me." / "Okay." / "It's got to go somewhere."
Jinbe reminds Luffy that he still has his crew. That he still has people who need him alive. People that love him and care for him. That he can't be weak if he has helped so many people already. That they're willing to take both the love and pain Ace makes him feel. And it's such a great character development for Luffy... It makes me go insane. He remembers his crew one by one and realizes that he's not alone anymore. That he has to be stronger for them and for Ace. And for Uta. And Sabo. Jinbe is there with him when the others couldn't, and it has nothing to do with Luffy's issues but I just want to mention how much I love Jinbe for this.
But he still feels the need to be stronger and the fear of losing his crew and the people he loves still haunts him. He tells the straw hats to meet after 2 years (that's a long fucking time. Like. Longer than the time they've spent together. Imagine the loyalty, damn). And it's... It's so beautifully written. The 3D2Y scene is one of my favorites because it shows the loyalty and love they have for each other, and how Luffy is willing to become stronger for the people he loves and the ones he has lost along the way. I literally have the tattoo. I am obsessed with the whole concept.
As I said, Luffy's abandonment issues and the fact that he wants to become stronger to never lose anybody again (Savior complex much?) still remain even after his character development. Because that's not something you get rid of. That's just how he is. And I think that, as long as he is with the straw hats, it won't be a problem.
Also I wanted to mention his reunion with Sabo! The guilt he feels for losing Ace? The way he clings onto his older brother as if they were going to take Sabo away from him? They're extremely codependent and I am here for it, honestly. Sabo would die for Luffy and Luffy would kill him if he did that. Also, I don't know where the fuck Sabo is now because I'm only watching Wano but I swear to God if something happens to him I will murder somebody with my bare hands. :)
Oh! And then it comes my favorite arc of all the show: Whole Cake Island (to the surprise of literally no one!). Luffy, in the beginning, is extremely optimistic when it comes to rescuing Sanji. He's simple like that. "If he doesn't want to get married, we rescue him. If he wants to get married, he just brings his wife with us!". And if Sanji didn't want to come back to them (truly not wanting to) he would accept it. But Sanji wants to. Luffy knows Sanji wants to go back to the Sunny with them. He knows Sanji isn't being true to himself. And God, he's desperate. Because Sanji is stubborn and his self-sacrificing and deprecating thoughts are even stronger than Luffy's, and he won't give up until Luffy lets him go. But Luffy doesn't want to fight him, he just wants his cook back. Because he knows that, no matter how much harm he does to him, Sanji is only doing it to himself (one of my favorite quotes from OP). So, Luffy goes again through the desperation of not losing a crewmate, but losing one of his wings. Without Sanji, Luffy can't become the king of the pirates. He's willing to die from starvation for him. Are you- Are you all aware that he almost fucking dies from starvation? I don't think we talk about that enough because what the actual fuck. There's this thing they tell Luffy (I don't remember exactly when or the exact phrasing) about him wanting Sanji back out of selfishness and not because of Sanji's well-being and... I partially agree? Don't get me wrong, Luffy does everything here for Sanji because he knows Sanji is suffering and lying to himself. But Luffy is selfish, too. Luffy doesn't want Sanji to go away because he loves him. That's his cook. He doesn't want to lose anybody else, even less knowing that they're going to be unhappy. That's kind of for me the confirmation of Luffy's abandonment issues. Like- He does everything for his crew, of course, but he's so scared of losing them. Then Sanji comes back to them, of course, and they have their own Pride and Prejudice moment. Not even Jane Austen can write shit like this.
I kind of want to talk about Wano but I haven't finished it yet (I'm like, on episode 1056) but I would like to mention how beautiful it is for Luffy to carry Ace's soul and promises like that. And also the responsibility he carries during the whole arc to save Wano? That's so- It's so fucked up. He's such a good leader and captain and everything I said in this post and all the things he does in Wano show that he will become the king of the pirates. I love him so damn much. I can't even write it down properly.
Anyway, summarizing everything: Luffy has a lot of abandonment issues and a savior complex that becomes unhealthy to the point of sacrificing himself and always carrying the burdens of everyone else. Because he fears he might lose his loved ones if he isn't strong enough. So. You know. It would be great if people stopped saying he's just childish and fun and that he doesn't have any character depth because he's probably the most complex shonen protagonist I've ever seen! He has suffered so damn much it hurts! Live Laugh Love Luffy! <3
#......... i love him a lot#he makes me go insane#please i swear i am okay mentally he just makes me ill#i truly thought this was gonna be longer ngl#one piece#monkey d. luffy
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Donald Duck and his family mourn the dead in memory of the victims of the terrorist attack and bombing - Donald Duck and his family in Moscow (Russia) and Belgrade (Serbia) - Duck comics - Duckverse
Unfortunately, sorry for the long wait, because I was sick for a few weeks, and I'm recovering a bit now, so I haven't had a chance to draw and post new drawings. Yes, I'm back and will post follow-up drawings related to the previous holidays that were marked as well as the following holidays in the coming period.
Unfortunately, due to the recent events, I am publishing my sad drawings where Donald Duck and his family mourn the deceased. The first drawing shows Donald Duck with Daisy Duck, along with his nephews Huey, Dewey and Louie Duck who went to Moscow (the capital of Russia) and where they are mourning the dead and honoring the departed since a week ago (22.3. 2024) a terrorist attack took place in Moscow, in the Crocus City Hall, where over 140 people were killed and over 360 wounded. More could have been killed, if not for a few young men (Muslims and Russians) who saved the other people and took them out of the concert hall, because a concert by a Russian music group was about to take place. Among the dead were not only Russians, but also members of other nationalities who wanted to see that concert. The perpetrators are alleged Muslim terrorists from the Islamic State, and all of them were later caught. I don't want to go further into the discussion about the main principal who financed these terrorists, nor do I want to go into the discussion about the current war in Ukraine, because my blog is not about politics and please don't ask me those questions. This just shows my respect for the deceased not only the victims of that terrorist attack but also all the victims who died in terrorist attacks in the last more than 24 years. It is certainly a terrible event, which is why two days of mourning were declared after that, and I drew the Russian flag at half-mast, because on the day of mourning, the flag is only flown at half-mast, and Daisy in that drawing is wearing a coat and a black bow as a sign of mourning and black clothes are usually worn at funerals. Behind them, you can see the Basilica of St. Basil as well as the Spasskaya Tower, which is located within the Kremlin. Rest in peace to those victims.
Покойтесь с миром жертвы теракта! Слава им! Аминь.
The second drawing shows Donald with his family who are in Belgrade (the capital of Serbia) where they are mourning those who died and died during the bombing by NATO in 1999, as well as the victims in Kosovo and Metohija in 2004. I said that I come from Serbia and what happened 25 years ago was something that many residents of my country cannot forget. I was two years old when it started, so I don't remember it, except from the story of my parents. I don't want to go further into the discussion about the beginning of the war because the topic is too painful, and I doubt that many would understand what I would say. All in all, civilians did not deserve such a thing and it is very difficult to get over such wounds. Because among the dead there were also children who suffered from NATO bombing. There was also the courage of the soldiers who defended the country from the attackers and died bravely defending their country, so they are also honored. In addition to Donald, there are also Daisy Duck, Grandma Duck (Elvira Coot), Scrooge McDuck, Huey, Dewey and Louie Duck (Donald's nephews), April, May and June Duck (Daisy's nieces) where they pay tribute to those who died in that war as well as in the violence in Kosovo and Metohija that occurred in 2004, when there was also a mass exodus of Serbs, Roma, Bosniaks and other non-Albanian people from Kosovo and Metohija and the demolition of numerous Orthodox monasteries and churches by Albanian fanatics. Behind them is the Church of St. Sava, one of the largest Orthodox churches in the world, as well as the Beogradanka building, where one of Belgrade's television stations is located. On that grave is written the dedication to those victims as well as the flowers brought to that grave.
Rest in peace to those victims! Amen.
Вечна слава настрадалима и нека почивају у миру! Амин.
Also, since tomorrow is Good Friday, the day of the martyrdom of Jesus Christ, which is a sad day for Christians.
These are my tribute to those victims as well as those who suffered, and that the victims should not be forgotten and history should not be forgotten, because if it is forgotten, it will repeat itself again. Feel free to share this, but please do not use this for other people's purposes and please do not complicate it with political issues, because this blog is not dedicated to that. May God welcome the victims into the Kingdom of God and may they receive eternal glory! Rest in peace! Amen.
#my fanarts#tribute to victims#donald duck#duckverse#ducktales#russia#serbia#moscow#belgrade#yugoslavia#yugoslavia wars#Crocus City Hall attack#daisy duck#scrooge mcduck#grandma duck#elvira coot#huey dewey and louie#april may and june#artists on tumblr#huey dewey and louie duck#april may and june duck#disney ducks#disney duckverse#duck family#fanarts#rest in peace#amen#disney duck comics#duck comics#disney comics
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