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ggukiepie · 11 months

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girl in luv (boy in luv pt. 6)

pairing: jungkook x reader

summary: jungkook finally tells you what you've been wanting to hear for so long...but you're still not happy

tags: bil!couple, college!au, bff!jk, two idiots in love, angst (what's new), fluff, happy ending !!!, kissing hihi

wc: 3.5k

a/n: lmaoooo hi im sorry this took so long. i didn't like what i originally wrote so i scrapped the whole thing and well here it is! i hope u guys like it. this is the last part for the series. tho i do plan to post some drabbles here and there (like their first time together maybe) but no promises anw thats its bye happy reading !!!! series masterlist / main masterlist

~*~

Your phone suddenly buzzes—someone was calling you. Though, instead of answering it, you stuff your phone between your couch cushions to block out the noise. You don’t dare look at your screen, sure you’ll get tempted to answer the call—whoever that was. You haven’t got much social interaction these days, always choosing to go straight home after each class, eating by yourself, declining invites to parties and hangouts. It’s not like anyone’s forcing you to be this way. You did this to yourself, really. You’d rather be alone than hangout with people. You didn’t have the energy to do so. You just wanted to be in your bubble a little bit longer.

Deep down, you know you’re craving to talk to someone. Anyone. But somehow you always end up alone. With your thoughts.

Self-sabotage, if you will.

The thoughts don’t help either. Your mind always drifts to Jungkook. Sometimes you think about him and his girlfriend. Most of the time, you think of your friendship. You missed what you had, even though you had to guard your heart every time, even if you got your hopes up at the simplest of actions. You missed being with Jungkook because for the time you were with him, he felt like he was…yours? There was no doubt that you were his. Had been from the start but didn’t realize it till later on. Your heart always craved for him, yearned for him when he wasn’t with you. Your heart felt lighter when you were together, be it doing the most mundane of things or sharing a special moment.

If you could just toughen up and tell him how you feel. But it was easier said than done. He already indirectly rejected you when he got together with some girl. But why would he reject you if he never knew how you felt? Maybe you were too busy protecting your heart, protecting the friendship you might lose if you would’ve confessed. You never thought he’d feel the same, even though you had moments that felt like he did.

You shake your head to rid your thoughts. You try to focus on writing the essay in front of you. Your Friday nights felt different now—stuck doing homework while your friends were partying.

You’re finally two pages deep when you hear frantic knocking on your door. You check the time on your laptop and see it’s a little past one in the morning. You suddenly rush to open your door, scared that you’d get a noise complaint all of a sudden.

You stand frozen, mouth agape at the scene in front of you.

“Huh?” you dumbly say.

It’s your three closest friends in your doorway. Jimin and Taehyung are somewhat conscious—at least they’re standing upright. But you notice the sway in their stance and you can smell the alcohol off of them. But it’s Jungkook between them that makes you freeze. He’s passed out, you’re sure of it, and the only reason why he’s sort of standing up is because Jimin and Tae have his arms around their shoulders.

“Why are you guys here?” you finally say.

It’s Taehyung who speaks up, smiling that smile he has when he wants something to go his way. When he has a plan that you might say no to (which you usually do). “Jungkook,” he points at Jungkook, as if you’d confuse him with anyone else, “is drunk.”

“I can see that,” you deadpan.

“And!” Tae rushes to say, like you’re about five seconds from shutting the door in their faces. “He kept asking for you. So we are simply complying with his request.”

“Because we are great friends,” Jimin pipes in. Taehyung nods in confirmation.

“Me?” you whisper, as if Taehyung were referring to anyone else. Your mind isn’t any better than his drunk one at this point.

“Yes!” Jimin whisper shouts. “Now let us in, he’s kinda getting heavy.”

Jungkook makes an incoherent sound from where his head is leaning on Tae’s shoulder, drool making a wet patch on the poor guy’s shirt. You take pity on your best friend and step aside to let in all of them, even though your heart’s racing because Jungkook is in your apartment.

Holy shit.

You watch them bring his unconscious body to your couch (they actually drop Jungkook and giggle all the way to your door, saying their goodbyes without looking back).

You huff at the sight in front of you. Jungkook’s cheeks are flushed red and he’s a little bit sweaty. Though, he looks so peaceful sleeping on your couch. Was he really looking for you?

You get a glass of water and two aspirins, placing it on the coffee table near him. The moment you near him, you kneel by his head and wipe the stray hairs on his forehead. You look at Jungkook, like really look at him. His eyebrows are scrunched together like something’s troubling him in his dreams. His lips are in a slight pout, lip ring glistening under your light (when did he get that, anyway?), little puffs of air coming out his mouth.

“Am I…” he mumbles. Your heart races. His eyes are still closed, but his mouth continues to move. “Am I at ____’s?”

Your heart seizes at the sound of your name. You gulp and nod slowly, then realize that he can’t hear you. “Yeah…” you trail off. “You’re in my living room.”

“Oh,�� your best friend says as his eyebrows scrunch up some more. “Missed you.”

You sit back on the floor and hug your knees to yourself, preparing for whatever it is that he might say next. A drunk man’s words are his sober thoughts, right?

“Jimin and Tae said you were looking for me?”

“Mhmm,” he mumbles. “Wanted to… tell you somethin’”

You shake your head. Though your heart yearned to know, you also do know it’s not the right time. Not when he’s drunk. He might just regret his words now the next morning, which might even hurt worse than what he’s about to say. “Save it for tomorrow, Kook.” You push yourself off the floor but he stops you by holding your wrist, albeit weakly.

“Nuh uh…” he whispers. “Need to know…now. Broke up with Jiwoo.” He opens his eyes slightly and looks at you right away.

“Jungkook—”

“Like,” he continues to say, “I did it for you.”

You feel your anger rising, your body heating everywhere. “I didn’t tell you to do anything,” you firmly say.

Jungkook moves to sit up and you take a step back. “No,” he shakes his head slowly. “Jus’ didn’t feel right.”

You feel tears welling up in your eyes and you finally walk to your bedroom, slamming the door and locking it shut. You block out the sounds of Jungkook weakly calling out your name. Your fists clench in anger, the words Jungkook just uttered replaying in your head over and over. He couldn’t just dump his problems, turn around the narrative and make it seem like you made him break up with Jiwoo. That you asked him to end things with her because it didn’t feel right. And he forced himself into your home, your personal space—and drunk at that! He knew all your weak spots and used it to his advantage.

You hope he’d be gone in the morning. You don’t think your heart can hurt any more.

You hear pans clinking which promptly wakes you up. You weren’t able to sleep that much, actually, knowing Jungkook was right outside your room. You guess he stayed in the morning. He’s either cooking in your kitchen, or someone’s trying to steal your pans.

Rubbing your eyes as you open your bedroom door, you spot Jungkook by the stove with his back turned to you. He seems to be making scrambled eggs—which is the only thing he can make confidently.

“Morning,” you say. You might as well clear the air as early as now. You watch his back tense for a millisecond before he turns off the stove and sets the pan on your dining table. He turns to face you and brings a hand up to brush his hair back, a nervous tick of his that you noticed a few years back.

“Good morning,” he mumbles.

“So,” you start.

It’s so awkward you might cry again. When did things get this out of place? You start to rethink your feelings. You haven’t even confessed yet it feels like you’ve lost your best friend already. What if you confessed? What would happen then? You felt your heart closing just thinking about it now. Was your friendship really that fragile? You and Jungkook hardly fought but even if you did, you always made up right away.

“___,” he says. You look up, eyes meeting his instantly. “About last night… I’m sorry I suddenly barged into your place. I guess I really forced Tae and Jimin to bring me here.”

You nod and lean on the wall behind you, preparing for a long talk with him.

“I just really missed you, I guess—”

“Do you remember what you said last night?” you ask harshly, cutting him off so quick his shoulders tense.

Jungkook swallows nervously and nods his head. “Yeah and… I don’t know if there’s a better to say it, really. But we did break up, ____. She just wasn’t it for me.”

“And you said you did it for me,” you say, pushing him to just get to the point.

“Yes, because I realized that my heart never belonged to her. It belonged to you. Still does,” he says in a rush.

You eye him sharply, staring at his features and expression to make sure he’s completely telling the truth. You want to believe him, you really do, but why would he say that then be with someone else.

“It doesn’t make sense,” you finally say. “Why did you get together with her, then?”

“I don’t know—”

“You don’t know,” you repeat, and Jungkook’s eyes widen in panic. “You think you can come running to me right after a break up? Like I’m some second option? You don’t love her enough so you run to me instead?”

Jungkook opens and closes his mouth, mind thinking quickly to say something. His hands start to tremble and he brings a hand up to push back his hair. “I didn’t mean that,” he says hoarsely. “I didn’t realize it soon… And—” he stutters to catch his breath. “I was just scared—”

You’re fuming at this point. How could he do this to you? To just play with your feelings like that? “Get out.”

“____—"

“I mean it, Jungkook,” you shakily say. “You’ve hurt me enough. Just leave, please.”

He looks at you longingly, doe eyes watering before he nods and turns to the door in silence. You watch him put his shoes on before he leaves, not sparing you a glance. You don’t realize you’ve been tearing up as well, wiping the tears on your cheeks. Walking to the kitchen counter, you realize that Jungkook made chocolate chip pancakes. Your favorite.

It’s been a week since the incident with Jungkook and you haven’t talked to him since then. You also missed your weekly brunch with your friends, too afraid to face Jungkook. Thinking about it now, were you a little bit too harsh? Maybe. You thought you’d finally be happy upon hearing his confession but instead you pushed him away, shut him out. Because you’re scared. Terrified. Things were already going so well with Jungkook when you both were just best friends and you don’t think you can lose him forever should you actually get together and then break up.

Funny since it feels like you’ve lost him already.

It’s 8 am and you’re all alone in the student council office, trying to get some studying done as you were restless staying in your apartment. Staying there just reminds you of Jungkook, so you’ve been spending your mornings here before the other people arrive.

Suddenly, the door opens which is unusual. You usually have the place to yourself for at least another three hours. Curiously, you look up and find your best friend standing by the doorway, laptop and coffee in hand.

It’s silent for a moment, the both of you drinking each other in. Jungkook looks like he hasn’t gotten much sleep, eye bags dark and skin lackluster. You suppose you don’t look any better, knowing you barely got any sleep the past few days.

“Hi,” he finally says. You’re glad you have the long table separating the two of you. You don’t think your heart can handle being physically closer.

“Are you here for something?” you ask hesitantly.

“Can I…” He trails off, looking at the printer by the corner. You’d be laughing by now under normal circumstances. You nod instead, because it’s bizarre seeing Jungkook here asking if he can print something, which is something he liked to do back when your friendship was intact. The room is silent as you see him connect his laptop to the printer, both of you avoiding each other’s eyes. It’s too silent, actually, that it’s driving you a bit insane.

“How many pages?” you ask.

“Uhm… Fifty?” he says like he’s unsure.

“Fifty?” you repeat in a gasp. The printer is free, sure, but it’s ancient. Fifty pages will take too long and you don’t know if you can stand being in the room with him for half an hour or so.

Jungkook hands you the coffee he brought with him. “I bought you coffee as thanks.” He smiles ever so slightly and watches as you take a sip. Of course, it’s your usual order at the café down the street.

He looks at you expectantly but you’re too busy looking down at the coffee in your hands, too nervous to lock eyes with him. A few seconds later you hear him exhale and it’s just the sound of the printer in the room.

Your chest feels so tight all of a sudden like it’s ready to burst out of your ribcage any minute. It feels so heavy, so constricting that it’s starting to hurt physically. Is it really worth it harboring all this anger and pain? For conjuring up these theories in your head that will make you push him further away?

You shake your head to yourself and look up expecting to lock eyes with his, but his back is turned to you.

“Did you really mean what you said last week?” you blurt out.

Jungkook jumps in surprise and whips his body to face you, doe eyes wide. He looks surprised but he also looks relieved, and your heart breaks a little more seeing the relief cross his face the moment you talk to him.

He starts playing with the hem of his shirt absentmindedly. “I did,” he mumbles. “I mean every word I said, and I’m really sorry that everything had to turn out this way when I could’ve just been brave and confessed all those years ago.”

You nod your head at his words and process what he just said. Deep down you know you believe him, but it’s hard to keep that in mind when the hurt outweighs the truth. You look up at him with a sad smile on your face. “Why now, Kook? After all these years.”

He sighs and leans on the chair in front of him. You notice his shoulders deflate and his back hunch a little. He looks tired and you feel your own tiredness in your bones as well. “I was just scared. Us being friends was so comfortable and so good… I was just scared of things changing and me losing you.”

You bite your lip to stop yourself from crying. Looking to the side of the room to avoid his stare, you whisper, “And I know—” you choke on your words and clench your hands in frustration. “And I know I’m at fault as well—for assuming and pulling away once you got together with her. I had no right because we’re just…friends.”

It’s quiet save for the printer and his feet shuffling on the floor. You turn towards him to see Jungkook slowly walking to where you’re sat. Once he’s standing in front of you, he raises his hands towards your face but stops midway. Like he’s about to hold you but he’s hesitant.

You’re tilting your head to look up at him, eyes shiny with tears but lip turned upwards in a small smile. It’s ok, you mouth, because you don’t trust yourself to speak right now. You watch Jungkook hold your face in his hands, thumbs going behind your ears to rub at your skin slowly, fingers splayed on your cheeks to wipe your tears away.

He gathers your face in his hands, thumbs gently brushing the tears streaming down your cheeks. “I’m sorry, baby,” he whispers shakily. “I didn’t mean to hurt you. I’m so, so sorry.”

You nod your head absentmindedly, heart squeezing at the affectionate way he talks to you.

“I really am sorry,” he repeats. “I… Yeah, we’re just friends but I’d like to believe that we both just know. That you felt my love the same I’ve been feeling yours ever since. Even though we’re just friends. But…I know better now.”

You look at him confusingly and he looks away from you and smiles, his cheeks turning a light shade of red. You watch in silence as he plays with his lip piercing distractedly. Finally, he turns to you still with that smile on his face. His thumb starts playing with your lower lip but he’s looking at you with so much adoration in his eyes.

You’ve seen this look on him before, every time you’re with him, and now do you only realize that it’s a look full of love, desire, yearning.

“It’s scary if we do become something more and I end up losing you,” he starts, “but I’d rather live a life of at least knowing what it feels like to love you and be loved by you, than doing nothing at all.”

Tears are streaming down your face but you’re smiling so wide and Jungkook’s doing the same as well, with his nose even scrunching up and his dimples showing.

“I think it’s normal to feel scared,” you finally reply. “But I’d also rather live a life of us loving together than loving from afar.”

It’s silent for a moment as you and Jungkook stare at each other. He’s wiping off your tears which makes him cry a little more, so you wipe his tears next. You’re both crying now but with happy smiles on your faces and it prompts you both to laugh.

“We were kinda stupid, huh?” Jungkook says in between giggles.

You nod and giggle back. “A bit silly, yeah.”

“Can I kiss you?” he suddenly asks. Your heart starts racing and your palms get clammy. You start feeling nervous but it’s the good kind, finally getting to do something you’ve been anticipating, been waiting for ever since you realized your heart belonged to your best friend.

“Please,” you whisper.

Jungkook wastes no times in leaning forward, his grip on your cheeks tightening just a bit, pulling you upwards to meet his lips. Your lips finally touch and it steals your breath away. Quite literally.

Jungkook’s lips are soft, slots perfectly right in between yours. He kisses how he holds you—gentle and careful. Your heart skips a beat when you feel his tongue, and you grant his wish by opening your lips just slightly.

There are no fireworks or sparks or anything grand like that. Your heart suddenly feels calm and at ease. Like this is what you’re meant to do. It feels like coming home for the first time where everything feels right. You feel a great weight lift off your shoulders and you know you’ve made the right decision by choosing love.

Jungkook pulls back but only slightly so he can catch his breath. He keeps his forehead pressed against yours and when he speaks, you feel his lips move.

“I love you,” he whispers, and the way he looks at you with his eyes, like it holds so much love and adoration and it’s all for you. “Wish I said it sooner but I don’t want to think about that. Don’t want to live and continue on with regrets. I’m so happy to have you like this,” he whispers shakily. “So lucky to be able to love you like this.”

You kiss him again which causes him to smile so wide that his dimples pop out. “I love you too.” You giggle again. Saying it is so freeing and it feels so normal too. Not some grand epiphany or realization. Like you’ve known ever since. Like your heart has felt this way throughout your years of friendship with Jungkook and only now are you able to verbalize it. You know you’re lucky, too, to be able to have him in this way. But you don’t want to give too much credit to luck. You believe yours and Jungkook’s love were destined ever since.

#jungkook #jeon jungkook #bts #jungkook x reader #jungkook x oc #jungkook x you #jungkook fanfic #jungkook one shot #jungkook drabble #college jk #college jungkook #mine #writing #bts fic #bts fanfic #bts one shot #bts drabble #sab writes

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shigayokagayama · 1 year

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Uh Oh I Thought About The Music In The Finale Too Hard And It Started Bothering Me Again

ok so aside from one of my favorite scenes in the entirety of mob psycho getting cut from the last episode, a decision which will haunt and torment me until my dying days, my biggest issue with the last episode was always the music and i think ive been able to finally pin down a coherent explanation as to why

disclaimer: i am not a music expert. i was in choir in middle school and i like listening to people who actually know about music talk about music, but this is not a professional opinion so take it with a grain of salt

so first, 99 playing during reigen running towards mob. my problem with this is less the song choice and more that the anime decided to completely change the tone of the entire scene. like, 99 works perfectly for the hype exciting scene they were trying to create! i just dont think this scene should have been hype and exciting. this isn’t a “music is tonally inconsistent” problem so much as a “tone is inconsistent with events unfolding” problem so im not going to put much focus on it.

what IS tonally inconsistent though is the next track that plays after it (timestamped)

this scene is supposed to be not just the reveal that reigen is okay but the reveal that dimple, a character who we’ve spent the last six episode thinking was dead, is alive! and the music they chose is so... sinister??? wouldn’t something more triumphant or energetic fit here??? i get that it has to segway into a really emotional song next so it can’t be too upbeat but wouldnt something like this maybe fit better??? it’s another song associated with dimple possessing someone who isn’t especially powerful to let them achieve something they normally wouldn’t, it’s pretty dramatic, it’s exciting, it has kind of an emotional through line in the back of it with the violins???

the next song is perfect. no notes. the second i heard it in the mob character trailer before season 3 dropped i was like “oh theyre going to use that for reigen’s confession” and i was 100% right. in fact, this song being so perfect for this scene is what makes the next song choice so confusing.

huh? what? why???? on the elementary school level of “well this is labelled mob’s theme and this is mob’s moment of self acceptance so it has to go here” i can maybe understand but it is the most jarring tonal whiplash i have ever felt watching a television show. this is music that we normally here when mob is fighting an enemy, this is supposed to gear us up for conflict. it does not fit the bittersweet catharsis of mob accepting his whole self at all.

ive seen two different edits with different soundtracks i prefer, one with “Passing my heart, I'm getting bigger” (at least im pretty sure thats what its called? すれ違う心・大きくなったなぁ?) and one with “Mob’s Kindness”. personally, i feel like mob’s kindness would be the best option. for one, one of them already played at an emotionally climactic moment during the final episode last season so it might be a bit weird to do it a second time. second, for when we last heard “mob’s kindness” it actually fits really well with this scene on a couple different levels.

just the title of the song on its own fits with the scene. it’s the first time mob really extends kindness towards himself rather than trying to repress it or smother it in guilt and self loathing. we also have to consider the last place it was used and how that echos this scene. the first time we hear mob’s kindness is in season 2 episode 1, following the line “i made the decision to consider my feelings more”, a line which fits really well with what the “100% shigeo kageyama” moment is trying to get across. “shigeo kageyama” is mob’s repressed power and, more relevantly, his repressed emotions that he’s been bottling up for years now. “mob” flaking apart and forming “shigeo” also kind of visually echos emi’s novel getting ripped apart and brought together again by mob’s power, so that’s another little mirror between these two scenes. mob putting emi’s novel back together is the first time we see him using his powers for another person, not to save them from any sort of threat, but just as an act of simple kindness. it’s the beginning of a realization he has during the mogami arc, these powers arent just a burden, he can use them to help people. and he doesn’t even need to limit it to that, he can just use them to express himself and have fun because they aren’t just tools that can be used, they’re a part of him.

#i feel like i lost the plot a bit writing the last paragraph but whateverrrrr #mp100 #mob psycho 100 #shigeo kageyama

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boopshoops · 26 days

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Yay yay tcoav qna!!!! I still have one more chapter left to read, but I’m super curious about the magic aspect of Yuu Shi’s homeland!! So far we know it’s been banned for like a longggg time, but magic deffo exists. How did it get banned? And regarding that, what does NRC in Yuu Shi’s universe even teach since it’s probs not a prestigious magic school?? I kinda just want to know the similarities and differences between twisted wonderland and Yuu Shi’s world

Also, I didn’t leave any comments on ao3, but ur writing style’s wonderful!! the pov switching is really smooth and not confusing to me at all, and i love how you characterized the staff members given the super limited information about them in game (in contrast to the students’, at least). Can’t wait to see and read more of it and how it differs from the game!! It’s so good so far!!!!

HELLO KRIS!!! kfndjsgjdndk 😭🥺💕💕 im SO glad you're enjoying the fic thus far. I've put a ton of research into the teachers and students alike in order to feel more confident writing them- it was my first time writing characters that i didn't make myself!!!!

As far as Dusk Summit goes, I DO eventually plan on making a post explaining it a bit more... but thats a long ways out as I'd have go learn how tf to draw maps KFNFNDN so there will eventually be a lore and aesthetic dump FJDNDJFJ

Magic in Dusk Summit is a rather tricky subject, some people partially agree that the land claims it as "dangerous," while others think its some weird form at garnering control over the citizens. It is a very... strict place, so to speak.

The main reason that magic has been banned has actually been long forgotten, both by the people themselves and the ones who rule. (Ofc i know the reason but thats entering big spoiler territory ehehe >:))) Therefore, it was simply watered down to "magic=danger!!!" Over time.

Even then they are not particularly wrong- given that in Yuu Shi's world, the outside lands still DO practice magic. She just doesn't know jack shit about it due to being raised inside the Dusk Summit. It's because that magic is still practiced in other countries that the rulers are able to handpick tragedies and push the 'magic?!?! bad!!!' propaganda.

The main differences between the two worlds of Twisted Wonderland is that basically, if you look on a globe, her homeland has poofed out of existence. Everything else is still there.

As for why that seems to be one of the only differences, i'll expand on that in later chapters mwahahaha- everything isnt as it seems, ofc!!

QnA is still open ofc! Come at me yall-

Also old doodle bonus weeee

Tag list 💛

@thehollowwriter @distant-velleity @lowcallyfruity @cecilebutcher @skriblee-ksk

@kitwasnothere @justm3di0cr3

#boopshoopsramblings #boopshoopswriting #yuu shi #tcoav #twisted wonderland #disney twst #twst #twst wonderland #twst fanfic #twst writing #boopshoopsoc #boopshoopsart

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atthebell · 4 months

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Hey i saw your post about the translator and pacs accent from yesterday and thought i would throw in my two cents as a brasillian, though im merelly a hobbyist linguist and havent a degree in it like you so take this with a grain of salt please.

First of you are absolutelly right about pacs time in canada not really affecting how he sounds, i watched tazercrafts content for years and the accent is the same. As you said pac has not been through language loss or anything like that, so much so that he still has a pretty strong brasillian accent when he speaks english and that before joining the qsmp his fluency level was still a little clunky.

I also agree with you that the reason the translator has a hard time with pac/mike/forevers accents is the training data, which is likely composed of mostly paulista accents.

Now heres where i can add smth, so, idk about the UN thing that you mentioned, but as you said a lot a lot of tradicional brasillian media is filmed in rio. So why isnt there much carioca training data? Well, its probably because most of that media is most likely professionally produced for tv, and most of the people who work in entertainment or news (or politics in regards to the UN training data) actually learn how to speak with a "neutral" accent, which is basically just a paulista accent but slower. With very enunciated words and little to no maneirisms (thats why the translator sometimes gets confused with some slang or repetitions cellbit or bagi say even if they sound paulistas). Idk why that is the established neutral accent, but it sort of is.

The stereotype is basically: paulista – as long as you dont use too much slang – makes you sound professional, carioca makes you sound like you like to party, gaucho makes you sound like a bit of farmer, bahiano makes you sound very chiillllllllll (think surfer dude chad type of chill), nordestino makes you sound straight to the point (but also some people think it sounds simple-minded and poor, i personally dont see it but its a think that enough people think that rich people from that region learn to speak like paulistas/teach their children to speak like paulistas), and honestly i dont know what a northern accent sounds like bc they have so little coverage in media. So yeah, i hope this bring some insight, idk why i wrote this i guess i just wanted to share

thank you for your insight! also i don't have a degree in linguistics, for clarity, but i took classes in undergrad and it's a big area of interest for me personally.

good to know i was right about the canada thing! i feel like that's kind of a piece of language misinfo that people talk about a lot and i wanted to clear it up generally along with the fact that it doesn't apply for pac specifically.

and the stuff about media & the paulista accent is super interesting! that's kind of similar to the accent many broadcast news anchors use in the US, which is a kind of general american accent that is meant to not alienate viewers from across the US rather than having a more regional accents (mental floss & insider articles about said "broadcast voice"). i think that being the case for brazilian media makes a lot of sense! my understanding is this is the case in many countries, so if training data was based on traditional media like tv and movies, it would make sense that it would be less able to understand other accents & various types of slang.

thank you for the accents breakdown! it's always cool to learn about regional differences and how they impact social & media settings.

#asks #anons #linguistics talk #super interesting ty for sharing!!!

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spicybylerpolls · 2 months

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while people are on the topic of finn, a little appreciation for our will byers' actor! noah!

i feel like he could have turned out like a model or something, if you see when he was younger, he was all in proportion and like very pretty boy, a traditional, good looking young man. but now thats he's older and grown into his features a little more - he's not entirely there, that wont happen until they finish growing at like 25 ish, but he is more oddly proportioned now in a nice way. he's EVER so slightly chubbier. he's also mega goofy, but in a different way to finn (although not THAT different actually). he gets away with it more cos he's still handsome in a traditional western way except for the obvious jewish features that im sure lots of bigots hate (see all the toxic milevens on twitter). his teeth are kinda goofy but also cute, but it's his smile that does it. it's kind of contained and shy, down-turned as though he has internalised not wanting to smile too widely, or perhaps just feeling shy and bashful when he's happy. which is VERY will. i think they are more similar than he let's on tbh. i think he's secretly a shy one, just like when he was a kid.

whereas finn seems to burst with light and laughter, then sudddenly realise he's in public and become self conscious again, and his face just turns sour af lmaooooo bless him

mad props to the casting director tbh - these are two performers with faces that are endlessly mesmerising, and acting skills to match. i feel so grateful to be watching their portrayals of this story unfold in real time. the fact that it may break new ground is a bonus, but even if fit doesn't, i've had a ball for the past couple of years! if nothing else, having their first adult scene together could work wonders for their professional confidence. if i was a pro actor, i would love to do an intimate scene with a close friend of mine, we would have a ball and the trust would be unreal.

and lastly, here's a funny little story...

years before i joined the fandom proper in 2022, when s2 was just coming out, my friend (who was very mainstream) showed me some pictures of a photoshoot with noah and finn. we were in our early 20s, fresh from college and no clue what to do with life. and my friend showed me this black and white photoshoot on insta (i think its the one noah recently posted to show his excitement of working with finn again for finn's birthday?), and she was quiet as i looked, waiting to hear what i would say.

and i was like... they look....

*massive pause while I look at her, incredulous and mildly disturbed*

and she said '... hot.'

and I was like YES, WTFFFFFFF

and she was like WTFFFFFF

and we were so uncomfortable and confused! they were young teens! but the fact that it was my mainstream friend who had literally just discovered the 80s through this show, who had a first class English degree from Edinburgh university, who had just started working at a prestigious publishing house in the city, who had a rather gorgeous boyfriend... i mean she was the most down-the-line person you ever met. and i was just so surprised and grateful she had trusted me to say this, and we proceeded to discuss wtf was going on.

basically - photoshoots, esp when the cast were teens, kind of passively sexualised them. im not talking explicit, but rather encouraging pensive brooding stares and poses that are something you would see in a couture magazine. they looked older because they werent smiling, and were emulating these poses that adult men would do.

on top of that, finn esp really reminded me of the first boy i ever had a proper crush on at 13. i remember it so clearly because its not the hair or the skin or whatever superficial stuff, but rather his expressions and attitude (and the freckles). finn, when younger, had this arrogant (and therefore irresistible) teen boy vibe which exactly matched this boy i fell in love with at 13. i realise now that thats all probably from a place of insecurity on finn + the boy's part, but even at 22 sitting in this cafe with my friend, browsing insta innocently, i could remember exactly what it was like to be 13 and my heart was just beating. whenever i think of that crush on that boy, i am 13 again. i am not a grown woman perving on a young boy. i am 13.

so i think, maybe, thats how many of us here connect with spicy byler tumblr.

and now, of course, watching them grow up on my screen (having rejoined the fandom post s4) has been a very... interesting experience for me. i think byler sex discussion on here speaks volumes about how we are all from different walks of life. if i wasn't an art major who has literally been drawing naked bodies from life since I was 16 at school, and a psychology student, i might not understand how to discuss all this stuff. as it is, i've got too much emotional education under my belt, and i know how to embrace my shadow self as long as im not hurting myself or anyone else. (vecna would take one look at me and say NOPE lol.)

sorry for the ramble! thanks for hosting me.

p.s. sadly im not friends with that girl anymore, but this will always be a legacy of our friendship (plus the fact that she was so grateful for my pre-existing knowledge of 80s music lol. & we both bought corduroy sheepskin jackets immediately after watching s1, lucas KILLED it. fashion king)

Thank you for sharing your story and adding to the discussion!

Your cafe story raises so many interesting psychological ideas about the nature of storytelling and connecting to coming-of-age narratives or even writing it/creating it, as the Duffers have done. As you put it, "Even at 22 sitting in this cafe with my friend, browsing insta innocently, I could remember exactly what it was like to be 13 and my heart was just beating. Whenever i think of that crush on that boy, i am 13 again. i am not a grown woman perving on a young boy. i am 13. So i think, maybe, thats how many of us here connect with spicy byler tumblr," and I think there's a lot of intrigue there.

Even though your story is related to Finn IRL, I'd say a part of writing/reading a story is putting yourself in the shoes of the characters and seeing things from their eyes. And that includes temporarily "becoming 13 again" (or becoming the age of the characters you're exploring). And that's not creepy. It's just a part of the process. Art itself is messy and psychologically layered.

A lot of Bylers seem to believe the Duffers would be creepy for including a sex scene in S5, even with the characters aged up, because they watched Finn and Noah (and by extension Mike and Will) grow up. But really, it's all a part of them engaging with the coming-of-age themes they've set up and "becoming 17 again" to properly tell this story how it's meant to be told, wherever that journey takes them. And in the context of a gay coming-of-age tale, it just might include sexual exploration and discovery. *Gasps*

#byler #spicy byler #finn wolfhard #noah schnapp #will byers #mike wheeler #spicy byler meta #no poll

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raveneira · 5 months

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Aight its time to say it

Warning: Anti BoruSara post, dont like dont read.

Aight enough time has passed and now its long overdue to be said so Im gonna be the one to burst the bubble since nobody else is.

Sarada's actions in 78 did not solidify BoruSara because it mirrored the NH moment in the Pain arc, it actually did the OPPOSITE and showed how flimsy the ship actually is and how weak Sarada's feeling for him are.

People love this argument of 'love makes you act irrationally so that proves Sarada's feelings are more real/stronger than Sumire's because she acted reckless like Sakura and Hinata did while Sumire stayed behind and did nothing'

Now at first glace that does seem to be the case, but after the initial shock has worn off and you actually reread the chapter with a much clearer head, you realize how much damage this actually did to both the ship and Sarada's character.

Now what do I mean? to see the problem you just have to answer one simple question, what is the one major difference between the moment with NH and the one with Bsa? the answer is Pay Off.

What do I mean by that? lets compare the two side by side and all will become clear.

Aight I think it should be clear now, notice the difference? yea, the very scene they claim solidified the ship actually weakened it, the very scene they said solidified Sarada's feelings as more 'real' than Sumire because she acted irrationally, actually showed how flimsy her feelings really are compared to Sumire.

It's true that Sumire staying behind could give that impression, but at the same time people get on Hinata's case all the time here for how stupid her actions was and how she actually made the situation WORSE rather than better by jumping into a situation she knew she couldnt win and made Naruto snap so bad that if not for Minato's fail safe it would've been GGs for everybody and Naruto would've died by undoing the seal.

But Im not here to criticize Hinata right now, because all in all her actions were out of love right? thats the point of this post. So Sumire's actions actually make more sense than Hinata's was because she knew she didnt have a chance to begin with so why bother going there? just to get one shotted? what happened to Sarada is a prime example of WHY she was right not to go, because thats what happened.

But ok since yall wanna be hung up on girls inlove for real all acted irrational and ran to their mans rescue which solidified the ship, well this goes back to what I said the biggest and most important difference between all the other girls vs Sarada, and thats PAY OFF.

Still confused by what I mean? well I'll show you cuz it aint just NH, Sarada failed to be like ANY of the girls who acted irrationally and fought for their man, keyword FOUGHT.

The difference is night and day atp, when I say Pay Off I meant PAY OFF, and with BoruSara, unlike everyone else I showed, had zero pay off.

What do I mean by pay off? should be obvious by now but the answer is simple, when everyone else fought for their loves they actually FOUGHT, they didnt always win, but they TRIED there were ATTEMPTS made to protect them no matter HOW badly they got hurt. No matter HOW much stronger the enemy was than them they NEVER faltered when their love was in danger and were willing to fight tooth and nail to defend them as much as they were capable of doing.

THATS the sign of true love in the Naruto verse, not the foolishness yall try to make it as just acting irrational = true love, no, its ACTIONS which is something Sarada did not take.

The arguement of she was scared doesnt apply here, because if your gonna use this argument as proof it solidified Bsa then Im gonna use it to prove why it didnt. EVERYONE was scared in those moments but it didnt stop them, they didnt back down, they fought for their loves REGARDLESS of how scared they were, even knowing that they could die they still jumped in head first and FOUGHT.

I dont care how you try to twist it, turn it, flip it or reverse it, if your gonna use this argument then you gotta use it all the way, dont just talk about the irrationale, talk about the actions, or in Sarada's case lack thereof.

If you need more proof of how bad this looks on Bsa and just how this moment proves how not strong Sarada's feelings for him is, you need look no further than Haku.

I mean nuff said right there, Naruto learned where true strength comes from from Haku, which is that when you have someone whos precious to you, romantic or platonic, thats when you can truly become strong, as strong as you need to be, and this is shown time and time again all throughout Naruto through multiple characters who overcame their fears and fought for who was precious to them, unleashing a whole new strength they didnt know they had. It didnt always have to be some brand new ability, but simply just having the courage to put your life on the line for that dear person was enough to solidify who really mattered.

This is what kills Bsa in that moment, not saying the ship is dead obviously, but that moment killed it in terms of perception and their relationship as a whole. We can keep HEARING how deep their bond in, how close they are, how much they mean to eachother, but if you dont show it and instead show the opposite then people will have a hard time believing their actually as close as we're being told they are.

Just imagine Naruto talking about how much Iruka and Team 7 mean to him but we never see any strong actions that proved it, would you still believe their his closest bonds? if Naruto still says Sasuke is like a brother to him, would you still believe that if they barely showed the two of them bonding and being close like sibling? pretty sure you wouldnt, thats why its important to SHOW DONT TELL, because if all your doing is telling people but not showing them your definitely not gonna convince them that anythings really there like you say it is.

Even her bs MS isnt an example, because for every MS there was emotion and build up and the situation was centered around that character, it was THEIR big moment, a moment that showed just how much the person who triggered it meant to them, which is why yall like to use that as proof as well but even that just goes to show how weak her feelings are in the eyes of the narrative and mangaka himself. Sarada's MS is on the same level as Sasuke's half hearted sorry to Karin, it was short, rushed, moved right past like it wasnt a big deal and just went onto the next thing because her MS wasnt important for her character or the plot or even her feelings for Boruto, no what it was is plot convenience.

Plot convenience to convince Sasuke to save Boruto because he wouldnt have believed her otherwise, he needed to see her MS to convince him that if what shes asking is strong enough to trigger that then she must be telling the truth, thats literally the only purpose her MS served, a half assed way for Boruto to be saved, same way Sasuke's apology was a half assed way to address his betrayal and get right back to the real important stuff aka the war.

Again this goes back to what I said about show dont tell, if you want people to believe her MS was triggered by her strong love for Boruto then you have to show it which they didnt, her MS literally ONLY APPEARS when shes trying to convince Sasuke to save him, it was literally a deus ex machina because her eyes didnt budge an inch before then, it was literally ONLY when convincing Sasuke that her MS triggered, do you get just how bad that is yet? that her MS had nothing to do with her character, her growth, her feelings, her bond with Boruto, but just as a plot convenient way to bail Boruto out and then move on like she didnt just awaken a major power up? do you not see how pathetic that is?

I cant make it any clearer, 78 killed BoruSara's credibility as the most solidified ship, and her MS awakening purely out of plot convenience rather than actual emotion and then moved on from like it was nothing just killed it even more.

3 years have passed now and during a huge invasion with an Jigen level threat she doesnt even activate her MS once, and you want me to believe her MS awakening was a really big deal for her character and their relationship? this just proves it even more that the MS really was just plot convenience for Boruto to be saved, thats it, it had nothing to do with her character or her feelings etc, it was literally just a deus ex machina to keep Boruto alive into the timeskip.

It is INSANE to me how people see either of these scenes as solidification for the ship, all it did was prove how flimsy Sarada's feelings for him are and vice versa but thats a topic for another day, this post is just focused on Sarada.

When Boruto was about to be killed by Kawaki she blew one fireball and then buckled under pressure when it was time to actually square up and needed to be saved instead

When everybody was hunting Boruto down she just fell to her knees and cried, even after hearing him say hes going to kill Boruto she did not try to stop him and just sat there crying, and had Sasuke not shown up, she STILL would've been sitting there crying and Boruto would've been killed

Her MS doesnt awaken behind any emotion surrounding Boruto, but purely as a means to make Sasuke go and save him, yet she takes zero action herself to try and protect him and it literally took Sumire spelling everything out to her for her to even try to convince her dad in the first place, if not for Sumire Sarada was all ready to fall apart again and just sit there and cry until Sumire said they need to find a way to save Boruto but she doesnt know how they can which is when Sarada got the idea to ask her dad for help

Which leads me to my next point, since we established Sarada's feelings werent proven to be real or stronger than Sumire's, how does Sumire fair in comparison? well you can probably already guess but these chapters actually solidified BoruSumi alot despite Sumire not stupidly jumping into a losing fight.

How exactly? well lets start with 78, Sumire is being smart about the situation, she knows she cant help even if she tried, but she also knows reinforcements are on their way to help, so its not as if she left Boruto to fend for himself but she KNEW there were people on their way to go help him, her going there would just be in their way.

Sumire was actually trying to explain the situation to Sarada but she freaked out and Shikamaru gave the bare minimum run down of what happened and then she ran off, in this moment Sumire tries repeatedly to keep Sarada from stupidly running into danger but she doesnt listen. There are 2 reasons for Sumire not acting, 1 she knew she couldnt do anything anyway, and 2 because their supposed to be pretending to be under Ada's charm, so leaving Ada behind to go chase after Boruto would be highly suspicious since remember, their supposed to be charmed by Ada, so Boruto being in danger shouldnt pull them away from Ada if their both 'inlove' with Ada now.

You could argue the mission shouldnt have been more important than her love for Boruto but my response is why shouldnt it be? they NEED Ada to believe their affected because by them being the only 2 who arent means their the only ones who can take her out, blow their cover and Daemon will be on their ass like a hawk. Sumire rather than thinking in the moment, she thought long term, she knew people were on their way to help, and she knew she had to keep playing along to make Ada think she's affected, which would have been suspicious if she ran away with Sarada too leaving Ada behind.

But ok lets say I give you that and agree it wasnt a good look, lets move onto 79-80

Once Ada is GONE Sumire wastes NO time taking action, she immediately puts together what happened and contacts Sarada, SHE'S the one with a clear head with her entire focus on saving Boruto, she's running to meet up with Sarada so they can do something to help him even though she's unsure of what they CAN do, shes still going there to try and think of SOMETHING.

If Sumire never had this convo with Sarada she would have NEVER thought of asking Sasuke for help, it was only thanks to Sumire's explanation and level head that made Sarada act, not through any mental strength or determination of her own, but because of Sumire snapping her out of it.

As much as I hate this for Sarada's character making her this stupid and emotional, it was great characterization for Sumire that really showed her strong feelings for Boruto. She held herself back in order to play along with Ada, but as soon as that was no longer in her way she immediately took action, her mind was clear despite the chaos and she was determined to figure out a way to save Boruto with Sarada even though she had no idea how they could, she was still running over there to try.

So if you wanna be technical then thats closer to all the other moments of people fighting for their loved ones, none of them really knew how they would succeed or if they even could but they were willing to try anyway, and had Sarada not have thought of convincing Sasuke to go save him there's no doubt in my mind that Sumire would've looked for and found and protected Boruto, or atleast try.

But that falls into theory territory since we'll never know for sure how'd that play out cuz things didnt go that way, but you can just look at how the scene played out and see she was determined and planning to help Boruto in any way she could while Sarada was just on the ground falling apart doing nothing to try and help him.

Which goes right back to what I said, when its time for Sarada to act and prove her feelings, romantic or platonic or otherwise, she buckles under pressure, this is something even her own mother and father were able to overcome for their precious bonds, Sarada literally just sat there in despair despite knowing her childhood friend was in danger.

Sumire who's not even shown to be a fighter in the manga [yet] still got moving and kept her head on straight enough to analyze the situation and act accordingly, but Sarada the active ninja whos been through equally stressful situations before now and kept her head on straight now cant? yea, I think its obvious whose feelings are being pushed as genuine and more along what Haku described and whos isnt.

I really need to say no more, I already know antis gonna hate me for this if they read it but hey the truths the truth, when a girl or anyone for that matter in the Narutoverse is truly inlove they always take ACTION no matter what when that love is in danger, Sarada did not, case closed.

PS: All you Sumire/BoruSumi antis really need to thank Sumire, because if not for her your ship would've died, literally, because Sarada was really gonna let him die by not doing anything to help, so yall need to be grateful, she gave yall your 'moment'.

#boruto manga #manga spoilers #anti-bsa #pro borusumi #anti-ksu

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winderlylandchime · 5 months

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1/2 Hello, I’m finally getting around to sending you the Out of the Box review. I’m a bit late even tho this all happened on Wednesday(i think) but that’s due to the fact that afterwards we continued to watch B99 and during the ep found out about Andre passing away. So in true brother fashion, doctor check ups got postponed due to family emergency and he has been in mourning since. Also sorry this is so long:

I legit just sat him in front of the interview and pressed play. So I didn’t even give him the chance to be ready for it. These are just some of the highlights because he was watching so quietly, you’d think Gale would be able to hear him if he was too loud: ‘Bria- wait no, not Brian. But Brian suits him. Fuck it, look it’s my pretty boy but all grown up! WITH GLASSES!’ Not even a minute in and he paused it and went ‘he looks like he’d rather be waterboarded than be here in front of a camera’

Here is where I forgot that his sexuality gets brought up in the first two minutes where the interviewer says “playing gay characters particularly for non gay actors” and he loudly went ‘NON GAY?’ And looked at me in shock and confusion. But then the topic immediately goes to Gale’s upbringing so he actually thought the interviewer was talking about other actors and not Gale…*gale mentions that he grew up pentecostal* ‘he grew up in a CULT? (I swear i only looked at him) *points to me* its all a cult one way or the other. Especially if you go to church 5 times a week.’ And then after a minute of silence he went ‘from a cult to fake fucking guys on tv *raises his soda* my man!’

Gale says he can’t really talk about his brother ‘me with you…but not for whatever reason he has which b-t-w *sings it out* shaaaaady, i just think people won’t care about the baby our parents found on a bus stop.’ He was just staring at the screen and then whispered ‘he’s pretty. How long ago was this filmed? I really fuck with the glasses. But a bit of a beard would be nice on him like in Criminal Minds (at this point im gonna give him your new fic to read since he’s obsessed with the beard/glasses) Gale says he went to San Francisco ‘i went to San Fran once, i did end up there cause I got lost though *long pause while he continues to watch* some very nice homeless people live there.. like my boy Ronny, i miss him’ They mention QAF ‘AH OKAY SHUT UP! Now we’re talking important stuff! Spill the secrets! Who hated who? Who fucked who? Who we still don’t like?’ *he actually scooted closer to the computer screen* (Gale mentions Aiden Gillen/UK qaf) ‘Aiden Gillen? The dude from king Arthur with the hot guy from Sons of Anarchy? Wait *pauses the video* there is a BRITISH version of it? Why?’ (Literally seconds later Gale mentions an ex girlfriend and he hits pause and stares at me) ‘girl….friend? Does he mean that like a girl thats a friend? Or like….they did kisses and stuff? Was he experimenting? You know what? We all have our moments, it’s okay’ Gale says that he has no personal knowledge about how it is to be a gay man and apparently my brother has decided to go full denial for some reason bc he lifts his soda and goes ‘ahhhh, yes, bisexuality’ and then just lifted his cast like a fist while sitting back. Gale mentions that he got blackout drunk before starting to film and he goes ‘i like him. I love him but i also like him. Two different things. I want to hang out with him in a non creepy way, i swear I’m capable of it but also if i had to date him id be down’ Gale is asked if Randy knew he was straight: *hits pause* ‘straight? STRAIGHT?! AS IN HETERO?! LIKE ME? STRAIGHT? LIKE…like..STRAIGHT?! *looks at me in disbelief and whispers* straight? STRAIGHT?! *gets up and immediately sits down* straight? Like he likes women? Like as in like huuuh?’ He then just stared into the screen with paused Gale on it and then whispered to himself ‘straight’ then he rubbed his whole entire face with his hand and then looked at me and went ‘oh this changes so fucking much. I have to alert my boys…and my girls…fuck what is mom gonna say to this? I feel….lied to. Not by him. But by you! *takes a deep breath* its okay..its cool..straight. Just like me….i think..Oh fuck’ Then he sat back on the couch, covered his face with his cast and after like 5ish minutes went ‘soooooo, i guess him and blondie fucking flies out the window, huh? Boy, i was way off with that one, huh’ I need you to know that trying not to laugh during all this was the biggest challenge in life. When I described this to our cousin, she compared it to the Bone scene with Holt and she was pretty spot on. Gale is now talking about working with Randy: ‘He IS extremely talented! (Gale mentions they have similar taste in stuff) *looks at me* do you think he listens to Lil Nas X as well? Please tell me they’re still friends. I need to know if they hang out. Or at least hung out. I got scared cause theres so little bts moments of them but they hung out all the time. I mean i could tell they were friends duuuh’ This is a moment i never even caught but when talking about Sharon, i think Gale messes up Vic/Jack names and my brother goes ‘who the fuck is Jack? Did i miss something or is my very pretty boy forgetful?’ The interviewer starts bringing up the prom scene and he says the he wants to talk about something that for viewers was the most difficult to watch and my brother goes ‘ahh yes, the proposal’ (interview says Brian going to prom) ‘oh yeah, that was also tragic’ ‘we need to watch the prom episode later. They were friends! He cared about him!’ A few minutes later the interviewer says “before we leave babylon” ‘lets NOT leave it. I left it once and it fucked me up for life’

Welcome back dear sweet anon and brother anon!

Are you watching B99 for the first time? I have a friend who’s watching right now for the first time. Either way, so very sad about Andre’s untimely passing. I’ve been devastated and rewatching my fave Captain Holt episodes.

I love your brother calling pentecostal being in a cult. I’m not going to disagree.

“There’s a British version? Why?” Does your brother know that the “British version” is actually the OG version?

His denial about Gale being straight is HILARIOUS. He’s twisting everything like people do for gay people “girl friend… like a friend who’s a girl” and “ahh yes bisexuality.”

And then “straight. Just like me….i think” DID GALE AWAKEN SOMETHING IN YOUR BROTHER?

STRAIGHT!

Captain Hold BONE is so absolutely the correct response to this both timely and accurate.

Here’s the thing. If you’ve listened to the Call Me By Your Shame or any of the subsequent episodes where Randy discusses the artist, you absolutely over to over enunciate LITTLE NAS X the way Randy does. I don’t know about Gale listening to LITTLE NAS X but I think they both listened to Bjork while filming.

“something that for viewers was the most difficult to watch and my brother goes ‘ahh yes, the proposal’ (the interview says Brian going to prom) ‘oh yeah that was also tragic’ CERTIFIED ICONIC. The proposal was hard to watch (for my prince) and also tragic for many reasons. But, yes, Brother Anon most people would say prom.

he looks like he would rather be waterboarded than be here in front of the camera. WELL if that doesn’t sum up Gale, I don’t know what does.

I’m glad your brother is here for glasses and beard. I have always said he has good taste.

#ask winderlylandchime #dear sweet anon #queer as folk #a straight man watches qaf us 2000 in the year of our lord 2023

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blueopinions49 · 2 years

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Nancy Wheeler’s MBTI

Introduction

Hello there this is gonna be kinda of a rant post because I want to start making another series of character breakdowns however im very torn in which one I want to start however I am currently in a dilemma over Nancy’s MBTI. So id like to pose the 2 most likely types of hers and try to map it out. Please let me know of your opinions and your thoughts on all of this.

the most likely types for Nancy are: ESTJ or ENTJ. However I think its important to look at her enneagram since it affects her functions and such. I personally I believe Nancy’s enneagram is 1w2 sp/so Being an enneagram 1 can give her the look of an Si user too sometimes. Ive seen some people type her as an 3w2 sp/so however I am not fully sure about this since I think it only applies to S1 Nancy rather then her character all throughout the show.

Small Break down of Each Type

ESTJ (Te-Si-Ne-Fi)

Im currently leaning the most towards ESTJ I think Nancy displays quite allot of Te all throughout the show and people who type her as an ESFJ are conflating kind behavior with Fe. But thats just a stereotype I get that in media there is this idea of high Te users being incredibly mean and irritable but not every character is like this and using that metric to type is just bad. Now to her axis I think I can see a bit of Si in Nancy she is very usually very careful and sticks to maintaining step by step solutions. Also she doesn't seem to be working towards long term goals (or maybe im wrong about this) However couldn't everything I just said be traits of enneagram 1? Since I've seen people conflate these two allot look at Princess Leia Organa (ENTJ 8w9 or 1w2) who isn't interested in meticulous processes and details but for some reason we see her get typed as an ESTJ allot. I genuinely don't remember if Nancy was ever interested in details which leads me to another thing about details Se is also a detail oriented function; extroverted sensing details and introverted sensing details are different. One Is based on prior examining things through a subjective sense and the other one is based on objective observation. For example an Si user could understand every part of a clock while an Se user would look at the physical traits of it (color, material, temp etc...) Ive seen people debate that Nancy having a develop Ne is what makes people confuse her Si-Ne with Ni which I guess? However look at Sokka from ATLA (ESTJ 6w7) Even when he fully develops his Ne in Book 3 he still uses his Si allot and constantly narrows solutions with those by exploring those and I personally don't see Nancy interested in exploring all of those solutions in any capacity. Maybe the use of external pattern seeking?? but then again that could be Se? IDK guys let me know.

ENTJ (Te-Ni-Se-Fi)

Allot of people use the “I know something happen to Barb” line in S1 as an explanation for her Ni however couldn't that just her going to Ne in stress trying to explore a possibility?. Also I do think I see more Ni than Ne I think Nancy does jump to conclusions a bit too fast sometimes. However I also see her step by step process (something an Ni user wouldn't be very fond of) Also she tends to be a bit too careful (but again E1). Also she doesn't seem to be quite as impulsive as an ENTJ would be even some E1 can be quite impulsive such as Light Yagami from death note (but I think thats quite debatable since Light kinda borders the line between impulsive and careful quite allot in the show). Also next to Se I don't see much Se in Nancy she doesn't seem to be that interested in Te-Se processes like other ENTJ would (unless again I missed something) she seems to be quite careful and sturdy with her processes rather than rushing head on like allot of ENTJ do allot the time. However again I could be assuming her Se is well develop same with her Ne. I could see how she tunnel visions allot in the show and how she tends to hyper focused on goals allot of the times making her struggle with her Se but I don't think thats quite enough to type her as an ENTJ how many other charcaters with other types have focused on goals too hard and ended up losing track of themselves?.

Idk guys sorry for the long rant post I am just very curious to map this out I usually am very certain of a charcaters typing however this one Is just weird maybe I missed something's so please let me know your thoughts below

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svankmajerbaby · 1 year

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✨️🎀🎈💞💝🕯🎙🤲💌

!! thank u so much for the ask. i love talking about writing......

✨ What's a fic you've posted you wish you could breathe life into again and have people talking about it? (or simply a fic you wish got more credit)

-hmm theres a point in which i have to tell myself not to worry about likes or comments bc what really matters is me getting the practise and exercising my writing muscles and having fun with it... But. i do wish i could get more ppl into my toy story fic. its got a whole bunch of wonderful comments and kudos and stuff, i just feel so proud of it and writing it came so easy and i poured so much of my love into it, i really really wish anyone who loves these characters would read it too.

🎀 give yourself a compliment about your own writing

-english is not my first language so grammar isnt often The Best, but i take a lot of care with using words and expressions as correctly as possible, and I try to always spell words right (i dont think ive ever confused loose and lose, for example, which ive seen confused a few times). some descriptions of spaces are particularly well done, at least to my own criteria, and the song choices are fun (or at least fun to write and picture in my head).

🎈 describe your style as a writer; is it fixed? does it change?

- honestly, ive no idea. i think i get verbose, and i write long dialogue scenes. i overuse the — to lead into another thought, because thats kind of like how my mind works. i try to be "cinematic" in my writing and always start a scene with a description of a place, its lighting and its sounds, like im used to when writing scripts. and i got the sense that usually the characters often ramble and go on long discussions about stuff that maybe normal people wouldnt just start out discussing so strongly. but honestly id much rather someone else outside my own perspective told me what my writing is like, i would trust them more than my own opinion.

💞 what's the most important part of a story for you? the plot, the characters, the worldbuilding, the technical stuff (grammar etc), the figurative language

-the characters!! everything is important, and stuff like grammar often jumps out first for me... but i need to enjoy how the characters are written, and feel like theyre real people with genuine motivations and interactions. i dont mind too much if theyre not super alike to canon, as long as they feel true to the core of their personality and values.

💝 what is a fic that got a different response than you were expecting?

-i was surprised to even get comments on my barbie frankenstein one. i loved writing it and it came through so easily and comfortably, but even though i had used that moderately popular meme of reimagining barbie as a gothic protagonist as inspiration i didnt really think it would be anything but something i liked to picture existing. i was so happy to see people enjoyed it too.

🕯️(there are two questions with this candle emoji symbol? i chose the first one, idk why theres two) was there a fic that was really hard on you to write, or took you to a place you didn't think it would take you?

-the tiff fic :'^) ive always liked writing sorta dark stuff, ever since i was little, but this was on another level. sometimes i felt (and still do) feel a bit awkward bc i really do push myself to write stuff i feel a bit embarrassed or shocked by, but i do think that if i want to be a better writer it does me good to make an effort to depict stuff that makes me uncomfortable and seek to write it in a sense of finding a way to both make if effective and relatively tasteful (or at the very least in-character).

🎙️which one of your fics would you like someone to make a pod-fic of?

- i have never heard about pod-fic before, but i guess i can imagine what it is (wonder if its like an audiobook, or if it has sound effects and the like??). i would love to listen to an audiobook of the barbie frankenstein fic mostly bc i would love so so much to hear the dramatic literary dialogue ive written in kelly sheridans barbie voice. also now that i think about it i have no idea what the creature would even sound like... that would be an interesting challenge.

🤲 what do YOU get out of writing?

-practise writing in english, a sense of accomplishment (when i get to finish something!!) and every once in a while some strong validation in the form of ppl liking what i write... all of it is super valuable to me, especially practise and the push and drive to finish stuff to upload, but the validation in particular just really hits that dopamine in my brain i guess

💌 share something with us about an up-and-coming work (WIP) that has you excited!

-its from the glen and glenda fic im halfway planning! i got a few dialogues written and some scenes sketched out, but its still a long way to go. im very excited about it tho! ive grown to really love the versions of the twins ive made in my head. hopefully theyre faithful to their screen depictions while also adding a bit more depth and character building ive wanted to take them through.

#. 🦴#i just noticed a writing mistake in that screencap of my glen n glenda fic fbfnnfjfhdhd #i didnt mention it but im also super proud of my mothers day fic. its the only one i made thats short and to the point #while still being effective like. emotionally. and i like the dialogue i did for it #idk man i love writing so much and even with how much im struggling with writing now #i still get such a rush of being able to make such things by stringing words together

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jackienautism · 11 months

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hi again!! no worries at all :) take your time replying lol, i know these updates are usually like. long. and your replies are so detailed! so i get it.

as for my initial confusion with the support system, it was kind of... everything? that i didn't really get at first? it was easier to find a system with byleth where i was getting supports quickly once i figured everything out, vs getting supports with the other characters was a little trickier.

dorothea and sylvain's supports were.... actually pretty good imo? i enjoyed their a support. their paired ending wasn't awful either, but idk. i think i'd just rather pair them with different people. as for ingrid, YEAH, i intentionally didn't get her to a support with anyone besides byleth bc i'm pretty sure the only characters she had paired endings with who i had recruited were felix and sylvain. and i was not doing that.

ferdie and hubert are good!! and MAN caspar and petra's supports..... SO good definitely recommend getting those. i liked their ending fine, but the supports were definitely a highlight and idk if i could do a playthrough without getting them. so interesting. next playthrough (where i'm planning on getting the dorothea and petra paired ending) i'm probably gonna get these two to a support again as well.

and YAYY i love supports between the girls they're sooo good it makes me so mad that so many of them only go to b support!! at least the ones i was getting last playthrough. but i'm v excited to see petra's and dorothea's. and YAY petra in a tree. i love that.

YEAH i thinkk my "recruit everyone possible" route is gonna be. CF. because in that route you can spare hilda and claude, who i like, and if i have to pick between killing dedue and dimitri or killing edie and hubert.... well. i like dedue but it's an easy choice.

yeah i played through marianne's paralogue!! definitely enjoyed it and it very much elevated her to my favorite non-eagle character last playthrough lol. i'm soo excited to see more of her!!

and ty for the class thoughts!! yeah increased mobility is good, i think i'll probably try putting at least more of my units on mounts this time around, but who knows. i like coming at battles and leveling from a character perspective, sometimes to the detriment of actual strategy, but it's fun at least, so. we'll see!

so. i've given little update on my playthrough because i. haven't really played that much. instead, i missed the eagles sooo bad that i convinced my brother to play and hoped he would pick the eagles (he did) so now i've been watching him play (and in true older sibling fashion. sometimes taking the remote and playing for him. just a little bit. it is my switch.) anyway! i now understand how you felt a little because i'm sooo worried he's not gonna side with edie. i've been subtly sprinkling in anti-church of seiros comments to influence his choices LMAOO. im also sooo sad he doesn't really like bernie or hubert </33 his favorites right now are petra and edie though which is good taste. and he also likes caspar and dorothea a lot.

i'm finding on a replay that i am so much more fond of ferdinand than i was my first time around. i didn't realize just how much he had grown on me until i was back at the start and everytime he speaks im like. omg that's my friend ferdinand von aegir. LMAO. still not gonna recruit him on my VW playthrough but it is absolutely gonna murder me not to lol.

anyway! i do plan on playing more VW today. i'm very excited about claude LOL. and i feel a little less distraught about betraying my eagle besties when i'm simultaneously watching a playthrough where that (hopefully) won't happen.

have a good one :)

HIII oh im glad then, i appreciate you saying that! and i love how long your updates are, it rly shows to me how much you care and thats so epic 2 me... thank YOU for taking the time to write these out for me!!!!

mm i see i see. i guess it makes sense that it was easier to get supports w/ byleth since that's like. the main character. and you basically get support points (????) from doing basically.... everything. like the instructing characters individually and even just choosing the correct dialogue choice during explore? it gets you support points or whatever so i can def see that being easier than getting stuff between 2 other characters. its esp annoying since w/ the others you mainly gotta do thw whole like... these characters must be in range of the same enemy unit to get the lil hearts (support points) during battle. and that can get tedious and like i said. annoying. and besides that... you have to eat a meal w/ them or do choir practice to boost support between the 2. which. can only occur so many times per explore. and that also requires you TO explore during free days. which also can only occur so often per month. hopefully that makes sense? dfknf i dont rly know where I was going w/ this. but anyway glad you understand what's going on w/ the supports a bit more now! good luck getting the endings you want this time around!!!! AND THE TEA TIMES TOO.... I TOTALLY FORGOT ABT THOSE.... butyeah youre right theres def a lot more that can be done to get byleth supports w/ the characters

well thats good! i still have yet to see them... gonna try and get all the supports between the black eagles this crimson flower run then do another where i get the supports between the BE and other characters! if that makes sense. and yeah fair enough, do you have any preferences for who you pair them with btw :o? DFJNGDFG YEAH OKAY SO IT WAS PROB INGRID WHO I WAS THINKING OF... its like. this girl has a legitimate fear over only marrying someone just to have kids . just to further her crest's bloodline . or maybe im just making that up. BUT ANYWAY I DONT FEEL RIGHT PAIRING HER OFF W/ ANY GUY BC OF IT TBH!!!!! i rly like dher supports w/ ashe though... i thought they were rly cute, esp their A support. i dont understand why we can't A support her w/ any girl though. its so dumb !!!!! but in relation to her supports w/ felix, regarding their B support, if ANYONE, i dont care how long ive known them, told me to get married and have children or fucking whatever felix told ingrid i would SLAUGHTER someone. i get felix has a problem w/ the way she and other characters view being a knight and therefore the "knight mentality" but jesus christ............

FERDIE AND HUBIE ARE SO GOOD!!!!! i esp love the whole like tea / coffee thing... that was cute iirc. and okay boss !!!! ill def get caspar and petras supports! im def more interested in them now that you mentioned them :] do you plan to recruit caspar and petra durinf your VW playthrough? or do you still plan to do one BE and one BL? regardless have fun w/ them!!! and have fun w/ dorothea and petra's paired ending next run through<3

YEAAAAH THE GIRLS<3333 AND RIGHT???? ITS SO ANNOYING..... LIKE I GET THAT SOME ENDINGS ARENT EXPLICITLY ROMANTIC (like lysithea and raphael's iirc) BUT THE FACT WE CANT EVEN GET TO /SEE/ AN A SUPPORT IS SO ????????? PLEASE... NINTENDO AND INTELLIGENT SYSTEMS PLEASE TELL ME YOU CHANGED THAT IN ENGAGE...... i just want to see my bestie girl friends interact w/ each other without there being a guy involved is that too much to ask. which supports were you getting between girls last playthrough (eyeballs)? bc like... in previous games all characters w/ supports got to go up to A support.... just some (the ones between same sex characters :/) didnt have an S . which, im glad three houses changed that, in terms of same sex characters actually getting endings together, but sometinmes only having TWO supports between characters is sad

WOOOO CRIMSON FLOWER!!!!! but yeah makes sense.... i was gonna say that in azure moon you can recruit hilda but yeah id well rather not kill hubert and edie.... also did you have to fight dedue in his demonic beast form in CF? bc im pretty sure if you defeat him before he transforms, its left ambiguous whether he dies or not. or not. i cant remember much tbh. i jsut remembering getting a cutscene w/ a black screen of him talking to dimitri. BUT YEAH. ANYWAY. HAVE FUN DOING THAT RUN!!!!!! its nice to have all the best friends on your side

MARIANNE<3 oh inm so glad that you did her paralogue and whatnot! its going to be fun to see her interact more w/ her classmates. she's still mainly quiet during group discussions but she does talk every once in awhile! or maybe she speaks every tijme? i can't remember so dont take my word for it sorry. AND IM FGLAD TOHEAR THAT SHE WAS YOUR FAVE NON BLACK EAGLE FROM LAST PLAYTHROUGH!!! a win for marianne fans

and of course! im not an expert by any means but. thats just what ive experienced while playing and stuff. and by the coming at battles and leveling from a character perspectivve, you mean like. going down a route that you think best fits them right? if not, please let me know what you mean fdgjfg sorry. but either way, makes sense! obv go w/ whatever makes you the happiest :] bc thats what matters msot in games like this.... esp whe n theres jusr SO much you can do and accomplish

AND OHHHB THATS SO AWESOME DFKGDFGG the same actually happened w/ me!!!! thats so fuunny and cool! i got my brother to play after he watched me play a bit and gosh its so fun to watch someone else play. esp when they have the same general opinions as you (he also chose the black eagles and edie as his first route, but thats prob bc of my propaganda LOL) and ssame w/ the older sibling fashion,.... he makes me do all the class bullshit, and sometimes battling, but he's gotten a lot better as he played more! we've been meaning to play together again... hopefully soon! happy that you're getting to experience the same!!!! and FJDGNGF SPRINKLE IN THOSE ANTI CHURCH OF SEIROS COMMENTS YEAAAHH i totally approve of that, ill be over here hoping that he sides w/ edie too. NO BERNIE OR HUBIE????? WELL. HOPEFULLY THAT CHANGES WHEEN HE GETS TO THE TIMESKIP..... (assumign he chooses to side w/ edie, which he BETTER) ouuugh petra and edie<3 good choices for sure. hopefully that means hes more likely to go down crimson flower than silver snow! caspar and dorothea are absolutely good side faves yes yes

FERDIE NAND<33 OH IM SO HAPPY TO HEAR THAT DKFGNDGF your friend ferdinand von aegir ))): thats so true.... and i feel that..... have fun not recruiting him and therefore having to face him later in battle i assume <////3 i will be hoping for the Best

YESS CLAUDE IS SO AWESOME,.... I WONT SAY MUCH BUT I LOVE HIS CHARACTER AND HIMM SO VERY MUCH...... since you enjoy edie and her route, im sure youre going to enjoy him as well! and thats good!!!! it must be nice to be able to see them in action again through your brother.... ONCE AGAIN HOPING REAL HARD THAT HE CHOOSES TO SIDE W/ EDIE. I WILL ALSO BE VERY DISTRAUGHT IF HE DOESNT

hope you have a great one too my friend<33333 thank u again for sending these in :D

#mine #text #asks #anon #my FE tag #FE #FE3H #long posts

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archer3-13 · 1 year

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There enough of a gloat of asks here that im just gonna bundle a bunch of ya'll anons into a single post. sorry in advance.

Anonymous asked:

God, save me. seriously ? we are talking about dragons. while intys could still justify that since the dragons are deities they can fuck their sibs, we don't know how dragons makes babies in Engage. maybe they can stay in a platonic relationship all their lives. Veyle and Alear did it.

technically dragons arent actual gods, just very powerful beings that get worshipped as if they were gods. especially in modern fe.

Anonymous asked:

"though the anons as of late have also weaned me onto a sombron x mirror sombron crack ship. so. thats a plus. i guess."

which raises the question of how their respective kids would react to that ?

probably with absolute horror and utter confusion, which is honestly an aspect of the hypothetical ship i really enjoy. the utter bafflement from the kids.

Anonymous asked:

It probably is better if it discourages people. asides from the fake incest kink the game placed him into, could you imagine what would happen to regular Elyos if Alear married Rafal and then hurts their finger ? this would be the end of the world.

see, the issue doesnt lay on whether the eng translation is discourging it or not as both versions come to the same conclusion: its not incest because the two sombrons are different. Rather, the issue in terms of translation as i understand is that the eng version in its eagerness to over clarify the matter accidentally made it more confusing, thereby doing the opposite of what they intended.

Anonymous asked:

I would dare to ask : even if banging the counterpart of your potentially dead half siblings was incest, who cares when Sombron can bang his other self ?

hence why i ship the two sombrons anon! see you understaaaaand.

Anonymous asked:

Reject Sombron x alt sombron, embrace Sombron x Lumera.

No i dont think I will.

Anonymous asked:

"I suppose it would anon yeah, though i believe others have also pointed that out in this endless parade of asks." doesn't surprise me, when you try to expand their reasoning you obviously comes to this conclusion. and also to the conclusion that the 4 winds are just as guilty as the 4 hounds since they "are the same person". and using the "it would just not be the dad they knew" argument is the same thing as saying they have different dad. that aside, why is everyone obssesed with Sombroncest ?

thats the joke anon as to why i and a handful of anons are obsessed with it, its hilariously fucked up and more interesting then twinlear incest discourse.

Anonymous asked:

Alright, how would the engage cast reacts if : 1) they were given a chance to bang with their mirror self 2) given the chance to bones their sibling's mirror self 3) the reaction of Celine seeing her brother hooking up with her evil twin 4) the fell twins and fell siblings reaction in seeing the Sombron orgy

the only definitive i can give you is that goldmary is the most pro clone fucker of the main playable cast, and everyone would look upon the great sombron orgy with horror and probably a little bit of shameful hidden lust.

Anonymous asked:

I honestly would give an arm for a fanfic about a family dinner between the fell siblings, the fell twins and the two Sombron... just level of cringe exploded. (bonus point if Alear demands daddy to pass the salt, and that 3 hands try to grab it : Sombron, alt Sombron and Rafal)

Honestly that sounds like a pretty good fic anon. id keep that on the backburner of possible writing prompts to go for.

Anonymous asked:

"Its an inherently nonsensical and difficult to defend position if were actually looking at it from a textual angle."

well that's what happen in normal times when you decide to not listen to what the canon says. i am actually surprised they even tried when Alear and fell Alear are a thing.

I suspect its because twinlear is low hanging fruit well fell alear requires familiarity and ya know. playing the game.

Anonymous asked:

This whole thing is just another "this ships makes me uncomfortable I need to explain why but my arguments are crapp because they don't align with the canon" like we had with Robin x 2nd gen or studenleth. not liking a ship because it feels weird is fine but when you try to fight the canon, you already lose as you are not the writer of the story and only can rely on AU (and yes, there is already people who don't like the whole deal so they rewrite the twins's backstory to get rid of sombronian shenanigans). I can understand why : shipping Alear with Clanne feels more disturbing to me than seeing them shipped with the twins. I cannot explain why though

i certainly dont blame people if they dislike the ship, but your right that it looks silly and is real Sisyphean task at that point when one tries to stumble ass backwards into an argument as to why one is superior for disliking a ship.

Anonymous asked:

I wonder who is bored enough to try to prouve that the dating options in a game that is rated pg 13 is actually incestuous. I mean they tried with Awakening and Fates and then brough up grooming with Three Houses but geeez. the only way to back this up are dna nonsense the game never mentionned and clearly doesn't care about. I honesly think this would never have happened if Female Alear was allowed to bone Male Alear.

anon your last sentence there threw me for a loop, but to answer your question i dont think its necessarily an indication of some lacking aspect of character to get hype fixated on things. i get hyper fixated on things all the time, and fandom wouldn't exist without peoples hyper fixations. i would say in cases like these though its less 'people are bored enough to argue' about these things and more 'people are trying to control fandom space like a school pecking order'. in fandom.

Anonymous asked:

It's maybe not so bad, after all. I mean Nel is cute and sunshine, but rafal, even though he is not the kid of or Sombron, still looks like and reeks yandere vibes as much as main game Sombron... i don't want to imagine what would happen to Alear if they went "i can fix him" other than the "you're the most jealous men I ever knew" meme. oh, and if Alear died, Rafal would destroy the world... twice.

hey, the yandere thing has its appeals in fictional ships and some people like the obsessive angle in their fictional characters makin out. a lot of people like that angle really. ship what ya wanna ship at the end of the day though.

sides i can't talk considering half of the things i do ship are insane obsessive weirdos being insane about each other.

Anonymous asked:

Sombron x Sombron is really crack because you don't know if it would happen with them in human form or dragon form. speaking of dragon form, how do ya find the dragon design in Engage ?

I actually always rather like sombrons cobra design, it helps distinguish him among the villainous dragon designs and i think it suits his character in the manner that he's less about raw powering his way to victory and more prone to subtlety, manipulation and playing it smart [even if he is a powerhouse at the end of the day, and the writing of his plan doesnt always make sense]. in that manner hes a solid combo of medeus and gharnef which makes sense and works in his favour.

as for the other designs, nel and rafal are sombron lite designs that work for what their going for, and well i really wish we got to see more of lumineras dragon design what we do get to see is fairly standard but work well.

tikis is pretty obviously based on her warriors dragon form design but more fa'ish in the sense it looks more chickenish this time. which, i dont mind cause the chicken destroyers of worlds are adorable.

the generic enemy dragons ya come across are fine for what their suppose to be, though it does make me wish we had a manakete unit to play with in the base game. that woulda been cool.

Anonymous asked:

The choose to make fell dragon looks like king cobra and made quite a choice because those are the species that are monogamous and protective of their kids when Sombron is far from that... the only thing they have in common is that female cobra lay between 20 and 40 eggs but we don't even know if fell dragons are born from eggs... are they ??

DID YOU LAY THIS EGG SOMBRON!!!??!??

joking aside, i imagine they went with the design less because of the biological nature of a king cobra and more so because of its cultural and symbolic significance. namely hypnotism which sombron uses rather prominently in the plot and which cobras are often connected with due to portrayals of snake charming. aside from that its also a very distinctive snake with its frill thing and a poisonous one.

Anonymous asked:

people saying that this is "just as kaga intended" are wrong. Lord kaga would never take such roundabouts way with incest, never offering a "techincally it ain't incest" and thus denying all canon relationship with the characters. by the way, do you think FE 4 remake will be M rated ?

idk anon, kaga if anything set the precedents for skirting around incest implications but in a very obvious way in fe that the series has dutifully followed to this day. deirdre and arvis are if anything more of an outlier being a very direct case of incest.

but speaking of fe4, i seriously doubt it'd get slapped with an m rating. putting aside the incest, well its a dark game its not any more explicit then any other fe in terms of content, and taking the incest into consideration even thats not particularly explicit in its depiction. it undeniably happens, but even then its a while into the game before its clarified that it did indeed occur and its treated with a tragic gravitas as opposed to being hyper sexualized.

Anonymous asked:

what you say about tree houses is true though. now when people stumble on the og support and ending for Veyle and Alear they think the og had implied romance in it because "partner " in japanese doesn't necessarily means romantic but if you cut that word that has a certain conotation in english, it becomes suspicious. same with the dragon child mentionned in their ending : the fact that the localization emphasized it was an orphan make it souns like they censored it because the jpn dub was being less clear about it, hence they believe that Alear and Veyle made a baby. in short : you can't win with the fe fandom, everthing backfires

You certainly can't win if ya go about things the way treehouse does. I dont doubt there would be discourse over these things mind, but ever since treehouse got involved in fe translations these matters have been particularly egregious. so i dont largely blame the fandom outside the bad actors.

i blame treehouse for making things worse.

Anonymous asked:

when recycling the future past dlc but with mirror dimension instead of alternate timeline backfires into fandom fight. Real question since Engage has a manga adaptation, do you think they will put the twins (I hope not because how is it gonna make sense ?)

i suppose it depends what happens with the manga adaptation, where it goes and what it might alter to fit its format. its possible we'll see them, but in a completely different context for instance.

Anonymous asked:

wait a second.. if the parents of your alternate self are also your parent does this means you are your alternate self's brother/sister ? and if their siblings are also your siblings does this means you are your own siblings ?

i dont know about that last little bit, but according to anti/puritan logic i suppose you would be your own sibling anon. thereby making it both selfcest and incest if ya fucked your mirror alternate self.

Anonymous asked:

people be fighting over a dlc that is not even well written. like if Alear is Lumera child in mirror verse than it means they must have had a different name since Past Alear says it's main game Sombron who gives the kids name according to their dead biological mama that sadly aint Lumera. (and I think that the 3winds had different parents to explain why they don't have the same name, but it's just me being clever, i doubt the dev though of this)

I agree the internal story logic is confused anon, but i would note that a story need not necessarily be logical to work if the emotional appeal is there.

and in that regard fell xenologue is a mixed bag, admittedly in part because its internal consistency is kinda muddled. fighting the mirror royals, seeing and engaging with their personalities, the atmosphere, even the intellectual implications of the twist all work i would say [atleast for me they do]

but how we get to this points is underwritten, the twist doesnt quite work in implication because of the questions it rises, and the actual heart of the story going on there with nel and nil and rafal feels somewhat disconnected from its world and sloppily handled.

i would have been fine with a delay on the dlc if it gave em time to hammer out the finer details of the xenologue, but as it is... mixed bag.

Anonymous asked:

it's always the funniest ship that get "moral outrage" like sure dating someone who looks like and is possibly genetically composed like your dead half sibling is super awakard irl but in a fe game it opens the door to gold comedy scenario. And Sombron x Sombron would just add comedy because if the twins end up dating Alear secretly when their dad are busy "doing stuff"

some people just dont appreciate fine comedy, as one can point to many historical and contemporary examples to prove.

though i dont begrudge people who seriously do ship the twinlear stuff, as its pretty harmless overall at the end of the day.

Anonymous asked:

if their only argument is dna, then screw. there is no evidence at all within the game that Sombron and Sombron have the exact same dna information. One could make the argument that Alear is still Alear yet they both are very different genitically, same thing for Zephia and Zelestia since Zephia is more OP than her mirror self. One coul perfectly make the argument that Sombron and Nel are different than their mirror counterpart when it comes to biological info using whatever argument precisely because the game never mentions DNA and no one could prove it wrong, all the more so as we don't see miror sombron's face and have no idea of how regular nel looked like if she did existed but I find it weird that Nel knew there was a other version of herself in the regular world since she never came here. just to say : anyone can play this little game. and since the canon text never mentions dna, no one can prouve that Sombron is genetically the same as his mirror self other than using the design but even that can easily be swayed by the other informations that the game gave us.

its Schrodinger's incest at the end of the day, which is in part why its silly for people to try and logic their way through it. except ya know, the fact that textually they dont even have the room to begin with.

Anonymous asked:

And here I though that Marth was Alear's dad this whole time

marth adopts all manner of divine dragons, so he can be alears foster father. caeda whole heartedly supports this and the two of them spend a lot of their free time supporting and hanging out with the kids. jagen considers it a headache but goes along with it anyways cause he secretly likes being the gruncle of so many divine dragon kids.

#fire emblem #fire emblem engage #fe17 #fire emblem genealogy of the holy war #fe4 #fire emblem archanea #fire emblem marth #fe1/3/11/12 #alear #sombron

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technowoah · 3 years

Note

Hi! This is my first time doing a request for a prompt list but can you do prompts 1,34,25 if you can put those in one fanfic, or mini series. Again this is my first time requesting a prompt list thing. If you can’t fit those three in there you can just do 1 of them. If anything I wrote just made sense, sorry if it didn’t. Have a good day!

Rather Be Devisive Then Indecisive...

Thanks for the request! I decided to do Techno cause I need some Techno content here!

Sorry it took so long 😭

C! Techno x gen neutral! Reader (platonic)

1) "I fucking hate you" "please dont say that"

34) "one more chance please?" "You're being greedy"

25) "You're right. You are useless"

⚠︎ swearing, indecisive reader, angst, angst, mentions of weapons, mentions of death, mentions of tnt & explosions, Wilbur's last canon life, sad techno, I didn't proofread, this story is so fucking long-

"Dont you see history repeating itself?!"

You found yourself in a huge predicament right now while standing by Technoblade's side, adorned in netherite armor and weapons. You were facing against the people you used once to love, the people you eere supposed to kill. You hadn't seen Tommy's face so distraught in quite some time.

Everyone thought you were the traitor, you lost the trust of the people you once sided with and loved. You couldnt stand to see the pain Tommy had in his eyes and the betrayal Tubbo showed. It wasn't true, from what you heard it wasn't true.

You didn't just appear on Technoblade's side one day, it was a tough ride to follow. The beginning of your journey had you looking desperately for a place to be, a home. You were lost in the huge kingdom with huge monuments and different types of people.

Then came L'Manburg. A place where you could be free, at least they sold it like that. You had met Tommy and Tubbo while on the Prime Path and immediately asked about their blue war coats and they immediately introduced you to L'Manburg. You were accepted a while later, meeting the citizens and making connections with all of them.

Then came Manburg and Pogtopia which led you here next to Technoblade as he went on about replacing tyrant with another. You were always on Technoblade's side ever since he joined Pogtopia. All it took was constant literature sessions and talks about politics and you were on board with his ideals and his hate for government.

You were apart of L'Manburg before Pogtopia and Technoblade had changed your mind on government he made you see everything through a different lense and that lense was beautiful and clear. You adapted his ways of thinking quickly and became "one of his personal favorites" as he would say.

Technoblade set off a firework explosion and everyone screamed and scattered, that was the "go" you ended up attacking somone else that wasn't a close friend of yours. You were trying not to attack anyone, this wasnt your style. Yes, Techno had taught you fighting styles and how to become stronger but you didn't want to fight who you considered your family.

You eventually found yourself on a hill looking over the explosions and swords swinging in the gleaming sun. People below were looking in your direction quickly then heading back into battle wondering why there werent any fireworks hot from above, but you couldnt do it. You just couldn't bring yourself to soot the crossbow that was hanging on your hip. Techno kept looking up towards you as you looked back towards him in distraught.

Everyone was yelling until Dream had spoken up.

"You know who the trader was Tommy? Tommy the traitor was Wilbur."

No it couldn't be.

"No! Technoblade killed Tubbo and Y/N left us behind, they're the traitors!" Tommy exclaimed in confusion.

Your mind couldn't make up anything at the moment, was Wilbur the real traitor instead of everyone thinking it was you? Everyone was questioning if Dream was right or not, but you were so into your own mind you didn't hear that one faint scream that lead to many others.

The ground started shaking like a earthquake was about to happen and then the ground started to break apart and explode revealing the huge amounts of TNT that was placed under the stone and dirt. You felt uneasy as smoke, and debris flew from the ground and up into the air. You heard screams of agony who were caugh in the explosion, screams of anguish who witnessed the explosion and screams of joy.

Emotions flew through you like blood. This wasnt what was supposed to happen was is? You were a citezen of L'Manburg before a citizen of Pogtopia and this was the worst thing you have ever seen. The sky turned dark and grey, the place you used to call home is gone and the person who destroyed your home was the one who built it.

"Wilbur?!" You screamed as you saw him and Philza staning next to what looked like a man made cave in the hill.

Everyone else followed your line of sight and saw Wilbur standing next to Philza talking to him. Philza had a sword in his hand and what is seemed like arguing with Wilbur as well. Everything seemed so chaotic you didnt know what to focus on, Wilbur and Philza, Dream inevitably sneaking away, or Technoblade's glare at you from a top a building. You couldn't bring yourself to face Techno right now. Technoblade was a source of comfort for you, but at this moment you had no where to turn.

The straw that broke the camel's back was seeing Philza kill Wilbur. He pierced the sword through his heart and as Wilbur's legs couldn't hold himself up anymore Philza hugged his son and fell down to the ground with him hugging him in his last moments as everyone below screamed at Philza.

Your vision became blurry as tears welled up in your eyes. Everything was gone. You had nothing left to go back, no home, no Wilbur. It seemed like Tommy and Tubbo didn't want you back in their lives so it seemed hopeless. Falling to your knees you cradled your face in your hand trying to block out all of the commotion outside.

L'Manburg was like a home you always wanted but never had. They were like family and you grew too attached. You loved them like brothers and a sister. You loved them you grew attached to them as well, especially to Wilbur because you looked up to him as a leader and he took you under his wing when you had no where to go, he cared for you like a big brother. Tommy and Tubbo were also another two you grew too attached to because of Tommy's impulsiveness and Tubbo's attention to detail and caring for others.

After the fall of L'Manburg Technoblade had to make everything worse.

He had looked towards you one last time before getting into position.

"Are you just gonna sit there!? We have a job to do!" Techno said while unsheathing a sword.

"Isn't the job done already?!" You yelled back still sat on the hill.

Techno started to laugh. "Barely!"

He jumped down from the building and into some rubble underneath him and you followed him down the hill. Techno had brung out soul sand and began placing it on the ground with wither skeleton skulls in his hands. You walked over to him and he handed you a skeleton skull, you reluctantly took it out of his hands and you saw him smirk at your compliance.

Tommy began walking towards Techno and you in a fiery rage ready to fight him. He couldn't get straight to him because of a small gap the explosion made. Tommy was trying to keep everyone on that side, safe. Dream and Punz jumped over the gap and joined both you and Techno by the soul sand.

"Stop this right now Techno!"

"You stay over there Tommy!"

The two bickered back and forth until they eventually died down and Technoblade spoke up over the talking and yelling coming from the side Tommy was on.

"Tommy, do you think you're a hero? Is that what this is?" Techno said while letting his guard down for a moment and put his crossbow down.

"I just- I just wanted L'Manburg!" Tommy exclaimed back clearly confused.

You werent a stranger to Technoblade's speeches you were a fan of them really, but not when its against someone you would consider a brother.

Technoblade spoke up over Tommy. "You wanted power.

"I wanted L'Manburg, thats all I ever wanted. I wanted..." Tommy stopped talking for a moment, like he was thinking.

"Tommy you just did a coup! You just did a hostile government takeover and then immediately instilled yourself as president." Techno explained to him in a more serious voice than before.

"And then you gave it to your friend, but that still a tyrant Tommy!"

"But the thing about his world Tommy, is that good things dont happen to heros. Let me tell you a story Tommy. A story of a man called Theseus."

Technoblade had taught you about Greek literature and how they could be compared to people in the kingdom today. He so happened to find correlations between Tommy and Theseus at this moment.

You were still anxiously waiting for Technoblade's long speech to end so you could get this heartbreak over with. The need to cry more never became more apparent until now, the need ro run away and never come back but you wanted to listen.

"His country was endagered and he sent himself forward into enemie lines, he slayed the minotaur and saved his city. You know what they did to him Tommy?!"

"What did they do-"

"They exiled him. He died in disgrace, despised by his people. Thats what happens to heros Tommy." Techno finished his Greek mythology speech.

Tubbo spoke up from behind Tommy. "But he saved everyone!"

"The Greeks knew the score, but if you want to be a hero Tommy that's fine." Technoblade started walking backwards with a wither skulls in each hand.

You had soul sand infront of you and you were waiting till Technoblade set the first wither out into the world. There were wither skulls in the brown grass so you all could quickly put the skulls ontop if the sand. Technoblade thought it was a good idea to have multiple withers flying in L'Manburg at once. You and Techno were probably going to get attacked by the withers too because withers dont know who made them, they just attack.

"Technoblade dont do this! We're so close! Im not the hero! No one's the hero!" Tommy pleaded and that made your heart drop.

"You want to be a hero Tommy?! THEN DIE LIKE ONE!"

There it is. Techno started placing the skeleton heads on the soul sand and you followed suit placing three skulls onto the other. The two withers started to form and grow besides you and Technoblade. You didnt want to do this at all. You could hear the screams from the former Pogtopia and L'Manburg citizens, this wasnt what you wanted. You didn't want Wilbur to die, you didn't want L'Manburg to go, and of course you didnt want your family to die.

Technoblade grabbed your hand and led you to a higher plane, both of you dodging the blows the withers were giving out to anyone in their way. You had made it a top of the building Technoblade was before. You felt like your lungs had no air in them, from the running and and seeing Tommy desperately trying to fight a wither above him, Tubbo shooting arrows next to Quackity and the withers making Wilbur's explosion bigger than it was.

Technoblade started laughing at the destruction and the screams of the people below. You knew Technoblade was a dangerous man, he killed and did it for his own reasons that you didnt argue against. He had told you that he will tell you one day, but this wasnt that day. You didn't want to hear anything from him, you had lost everything.

"I fucking hate you." You breathed out in disbelief at the destruction below.

"Please dont say that." Techno rolled his eyes.

"You're not telling the truth-"

"MY LIFE IS GONE TECHNO! I- My home is gone! Wilbur is gone! Where do I go?!"

"Hou have me! What are you talking about? Did you just blindly follow me?! Newsflash I'm not Wilbur, Im not Schlatt! Im my own person that dosent associate with government so might as well destroy the government physically." Techno looked back out into the chaos.

"This cant be the way!"

"Do you have another plan?!"

"If I did it wouldn't have mattered." You said calming down, but still angry.

"Should've said something sooner." Techno said while walking away from the edge of the building and away from you.

"Again, it wouldn't have mattered." You said as a final statement before he walked away.

You didnt know where he was going nor did you care at this point. You retreated for now and found yourself back in Pogtopia. Going down into the decorated cave and reminiscing on times shared. The moments where Tommy was messing with Wilbur, when Tubbo immediately relaxed when he found himself around Pogtopia and he could be himself, when Techno and you had extremely deep talks in the potato farm.

You ended up going back to your home later that night trying to clear your mind and trying to know where to go next. The next morning your feet had a mind of its own that morning because you ended up at Tommy's house. You had knocked on his door and he swung it opened it with his widened eyes not expecting you to be there. He was bandaged up more than usual, he had scars on his hands and face too. It was a sad sight for you.

"Y/N?! What are you doing here!? I didn't-"

You cut Tommy off by hugging him and trying not to cry at the sight.

"Im so sorry Tommy." You said regretting everything.

"Im sorry I hurt you."

"Hey calm down. I forgive you, but it's gonna be hard ya know?" Tommy explained as you let him go sniffling.

"I understand, you shouldn't feel obligated to forgive me I know its going to be hard to help them grow even though I betrayed them." You slightly laughed and Tommy smiled.

You felt accomplished that day. You hung out with Tommy the whole day, then found Tubbo as well. They both accepted you but slowly but surely were going to forgive you. You hated that they were in pain but they knew you were in pain as well. Later that day you sat down with the both of them and wrote letters to everyone wanting to reconnect again. The two had said they would help deliver the letters while you delivered some too.

The day turned into night and you and Tubbo were currently walking around doing nothing in particular. Tommy had headed home as you promised to visit him tomorrow. You and Tubbo both ended up on the topic of Phil. Silence fell upon you two, you didn't know what to say about that. You didn't know Phil that well, but he seemed regretful. Wilbur's death became a touchy subject between you two. Tubbo then asked you about Technoblade and you had no answer to that either.

Technoblade left without telling you anything at first you didnt care, but now you are slightly regretting having that stupid fight. Days continued to go on and your regret became more apparent each and every day. You had reconnected with former L'Manburg members and asked for forgiveness. It was a slow process but you all became closer in due time.

Technoblade and your relationship grew further apart and you noticed that. You never seen him since the final day of L'Manburg until one day.

You had visited the abandoned and long forgotton Pogtopia once more longing for the days before all Hell broke loose.

"What are you doing here?" You turned your head to see Technoblade standing not too far away from you.

"What are YOU doing here?! Where have you been?" You exclaimed not knowing whether to run to him or stand still.

"Well im used to being left alone. It's not that hard you should try it sometimes."

"Last thing I remember was you walking away."

"Last thing I remember was you yelling at me and telling me that you fucking hated me." Techno said matching your tone.

"I was in a bad place at that moment." You tried to justify your actions when in reality you couldn't.

"Weren't you all!"

"What's that supposed to mean?" You said getting defensive.

"I mean all of you L'Manburgians. You all were going through something. That something was the death of your leader and the inevitable death if your country. You apparently never let go of that side, L'Manburg is still with you somehow." Techno explained to you.

He always read you like an open book. You still never let go of L'Manburg and thats why you went back and left your and Technoblade's relationship behind. Yes that was your fault, but you can try and reconnect, try to build trust again.

"Can't I be with them and you at the same time?" You asked, while your confidence left your body.

"NO! WHAT?! Why would you say that?! Have you been listening to me?!"

"I have! You-"

"No you clearly fucking havent! They are feeding into the very thing they sought to destroy! History is repeating and you going back is only encouraging it! Soon enough the new "L'Manburg" will fall time and time again!" Technoblade yelled clearly fed up with the conversation.

"Technoblade. I wanted to make ammends with you! I wanted to be on your side again!" You pleaded.

"Apparently not because you keep runnning to L'Manburg!"

You were getting desperate, it felt like everything was lost again. Why did you have to chose between anti-government and pro-government. You didnt have to, you just needed your friendship that was torn apart glued back together. The need to rekindle the friendship between you and Technoblade began to exceed everything else and continued to cloud your mind.

"One more chance please?!"

"You're being greedy." Techno taunted.

"Techno listen! I-"

"I am listening." He interrupted you on purpose.

"Seriously I wanted to rekindle our friendship so please just let me do this!" You pleaded.

"That's not going to be happening anytime soon. You know Im usually the one being left, but now that I see you like this I now understand why people leave others." He laughed.

You stayed silent and that gave him the opportunity to speak more.

"Those that have treated me with kindness, I will repay that kindness tenfold. And those that treat me with injustice, that use me, that hunt me down, that hurt my friends. I shall pay that injustice a thousand times over."

Another speech he would use another time. Your gaze was set on the stone ground beneath you. You couldn't face him and you knew he was talking about you. You weren't going to get the happy ending you always dreamt of. You were always aware of falling out of friendships but you never knew that one of your falling friendships would hurt this badly.

"All that time ago, you're right, you were right. You are useless."

"I dont need you anymore." Technoblade continued and ascended up the stairs to leave. He left you alone down in Pogtopia, it was hard.

"I came here to get actual shit done, but it turns out I couldn't." You heard Technoblade mumble upstairs before you were for sure he left.

You were left in the once lively underground community of Pogtopia. It was quiet and still now with the only thing was a small cool whispering of the wind.

You had your family, slowly but surely it was coming together but now everything seemed more broken than ever. Unbeknownst to you everything would get worse.

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wizkiddx · 3 years

Note

If your request are open, vouldd you then make something where reader is thicc and is scared to sit on Tom's lap, but Tom doesn't mind at all, he just adores you no matter what.

a/n just a friendly remind EVERYONE is the best version of themselves no matter what, you do you, for you <33

I hope this is okay anon, sorry don't feel like this is v good so im sorry x

warnings: body image/weight issues / low self esteem / implied SMUT

//////////////////////////////////////

Awkward. That’s what it was. You didn’t intend for it to be this way… god you hated it so much and even if you somewhat blamed yourself- nothing could diffuse the awkward air in the room. It was stupid too, you had been with Tom for a month now. And it wasn’t like your whole evening had been this awkward and hellish, in fact, quite the opposite.

Date night had consisted of Tom cooking attempting a fancy steak and homemade fries meal for you both. While it had looked a lot less impressive than Tom’s plans (a sad looking lump of meat)- it had still been the perfect evening. Especially since given Tom’s public persona, neither of you dared to go out for dinner together - arguably a shitty attempt at cooking was more fun though.

You’d honestly never felt more special, more free or at ease than this evening. Until you and Tom had both moved to the sitting room (which he’d forced a stubborn Harry out of) for a movie night. He had gone to the loo whilst you prepared for the movie, only re-entering the room when your back was turned to read the back of the old DVD case. Seizing his opportunity with a mischievous smirk, Tom crept up behind you, wrapping his arms round your waist and then pulling the two of you down to the sofa- both your bodies spinning in an uncoordinated manner as your shrieked.

You’d landed on top of him, your chest and belly pressed up against his and you instantly hated it.

Your relationship with your own body image was possibly the most complicated and toxic relationship you’d had in your life. To be honest, you’d never felt super comfortable in his own skin; but last year after you’d put on a little extra weight, the nagging voice in your head became impossible to ignore. And it made everything more difficult. It ruled out half the fashionable high street shops- who seem to only cater to people of a certain build. It meant you would much rather sweat your ass off in boiling heat, than dare to take your jacket off and expose what you thought to be ‘far from the ideal’ body type.

But worst off it made intimacy impossible.

Just like now, as you felt your were crushing Tom’s chest, quickly scrambling upwards and landing on the opposite side of the sofa. Tom wasn’t blind or ignorant, he’d seen the flash of fear as you’d desperately climbed away from him; he saw the defeated look as you sat dead ahead, refusing to look at him and awaiting him to start the movie. What he was less sure on though, was how to handle it. The last thing he wanted to do was make you feel uncomfortable and question you. Which is why he quickly leaned over and grabbed the remote to hit play.

Thats how the opening scenes of ‘Crazy, stupid, love’ started. Both of you sitting awkwardly upright, like you were in school, eyes solely looking straight ahead. The atmosphere was tense to say the least, your breath hitching at the slightest movement Tom made- from what you could see out the corner of your eye. Which of course, he noticed.

So, without much pre-planning in his head, Tom hit pause on the remote and instantly turned to you, seeing your confused gaze. He neeeded to say this.

“You know you’re so beautiful.” He said it so astutely, so point-blanc and so seriously you had a harder time than normal brushing it off.

“Tom no I-“

“No I’m serious. You are so beautiful and it hurts me that you don’t see what I see. Alright?”

“no I-“ You were gulping like a fish, stammering between the two words before Tom cut you off again, voicce louder this time.

“I said alright? As in do you understand?” He sighed, tone softening as the confusion and embarrassment on your face said it all. “I’m serious Y/n. I get that you have issues with some parts of yourself and I’m not going to cure that in one night but… I want, no, I need you to know how beautiful I think you are.”

“It’s not your fault.” Rather you answered a different question entirely, one you had made up in your head.

“But I want it to be my business to help you fix. I know its your journey but I want to be there. Will you let me?”

“You’re getting all this because of one rugby tackle awkward moment?”

“No, but I do want you to feel comfortable with me, okay?”

“Okay.” Your voice was barely above a whisper but Tom heard and replied with a breathy laugh, which made you pull your gaze up from picking at your fingers. And sure enough, he was sporting the warmest and kindest smile, the type that gave you no choice but to return, like it was infectious.

“How about we start…” He held his hands out which you took, eyebrows furrowing as he pulled you further and further towards him. “-with me showing you just how beautiful you are.” His voice was intoxicating, almost distracting you from the fact he kept pulling you over him on the sofa, to the point you had to move your knees and kneel eitherside of his legs to keep balance. Once your face was barely centimetres from his, both your eyes flitting between eyes and lips - Tom shifted his hands to your waist and slowly applied a downward pressure.

Your breath hitched because you knew what he was asking you to do. He wanted you to sit completely on his lap, which terrified you.

But then he whispered a ‘dont worry’ and hooked his lips against yours. The movements slow and sensual, as you got lost in the moment, lost in the warmth that radiated from the boy.

Too lost to notice, to care, or to be conscious of your weight against his legs. Because really… did it matter? When you had a boy in front of you who liked loved every single part of you.

Your worth wasn’t defined by Tom, but he did do a hell of a lot to see you for what you really were.

~~~~~~~let me know what u think <33 ~~~~~~~~~

tag ist: @thefernandasantana @lovehollandy12 @hallecarey1 @crossyourpeter @hollandfanficlove

#tom holland x reader #tom holland fluff #tom holland smut #tom holland #tom holland blurb #tom holland x you #tom holland imagine #tomholland #peter parker

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heyitsyn · 4 years

Text

White Carnation

Ex!Iwaizumi Hajime x Reader

a/n: iwa-chan being your ex is so painful and numbing

huhuhu angst isnt my forte but this is an exception bc chi is my sista

anon request: ex-boyfriend/childhood friend iwaizumi would be super angsty but i have no idea what they’d fight about ,, now imagine if after being kitaichi’s manager/medic, reader becomes karasuno’s medic/temporary manager (until kiyoko got recruited),, then she couldn’t come to the seijoh practice match so she has no idea her team fought her ex,,, only to find out during inter-high and everyone’s like wtf??? that spiky haired ace is your ex?? meanwhile kageyama’s like “yall didn’t know?” — chi

ong this finna be painful

its always been the three of you

with living across the oikawas came great perks

even way before you could remember, you were always with the 2 other boys: your neighbor across your house, tooru, and his best friend who practically lived there, hajime

hajime first saw you when you were covered in dirt after you were trying to catch a butterfly for tooru at the back and oikawa pushed you out of the way into a puddle of mud when he saw a bug

iwa stared at you then immediately said ‘my name is iwaijumi hajime. i think youre really pretty’

yep thats really how it went

and poor babie didnt know how to pronounce his ‘z’s yet so it sounds like ‘j’s :(

while tooru liked you because you werent like other girls who stayed inside and played dolls instead playing outside

you played with him at his back yard with the volleyball he owned and always made him laugh and have fun

iwa liked you because you didnt shy away from bugs, instead you were braver than tooru and even helped iwa look for any beetles and caught them for him to keep as pets

they liked you because you were like them

you were like one of the bois

but that kinda hurt you in the future

as you all grew up, you started going through yanno teenager things

like you started to have crushes

specifically on your best friend, iwaizumi hajime

thankfully tooru didnt see you like that and still saw you as one of the bois and saw you as that annoying twin sister

but unfortunately, iwa did too

every time you made an effort to do something to emphasize that you were, hello, a girl, he would laugh and tease you

‘hehe i didnt think you even knew what a dress was!’

was his comment when you came over wearing a yellow sundress with flats

tooru, who you shared these secrets with, gave you a worried glance but you smiled, covering up the hurt

‘meh. my mom forgot to dry my clothes so i had to wear these old clothes’

no, they werent old

they were just bought yesterday with the intention of finally being recognized as girl and complimented

but the person it was for, couldnt even be bothered to remember that you werent just one of the boys and that you possibly wanted to be told that you were pretty or cute

your other best friend noticed your quietness and he stood up from his crouching position and placed a hand on your shoulder, making you look at him

your teary eyes made him sigh but he grinned at you

‘its really pretty, y/n-chan! you should wear it more often! pretty things deserve to be seen and complimented’

god why couldnt you have a crush on oikawa tooru instead

why did it have to be towards the boy who was too caught up with catching bugs and playing ball to ever see you differently and has never said a single praise towards you?

‘what do you think, iwa-chan? isnt she pretty?’

oikawa hinted but hajime remained his eyes on the tv as the players hit the ball, too distracted to even be bothered to look at you

‘she looks the same’

he mumbled and your nose stung and eyes watered, looking down to hide the wobbling of your lips

‘its okay, kawa-chan. can i wear your clothes for now? i dont like this dress thats why i never wore it’

oikawa tried to stop you but you were already straight up the stairs and towards his room

he angrily stomped over to iwa and slapped his arm, startling the other boy and him snarling in pain

‘what the-’

‘youre so dumb. youre so mean. i wonder where she went wrong and what she saw. seriously’

he ranted and moved to sit back on the floor but not before kicking iwaizumi, making him fall on his side

‘OI KUSOKA-’

‘so whos winning?’

your voice interrupted iwa’s mid-scream and he looked up from the floor to see you wearing an alien hoodie and a pair of basketball shorts that were a little too loose so they drooped by your knees

your originally curled and elegantly braided hair was now pulled up into a bun by a scrunchie that you left around the house from years ago

there was a bit of redness around your eyes and iwa scrambled up to check if you were okay since your face looked swollen

‘oi, did you eat something weird? your face is all red so youre probably having a reaction’

he fretted and you watched as his hands glided across your face and held you by the shoulders to take a closer look

‘yea, a reaction from a bad reaction’

thankfully iwa was too busy checking to hear oikawa snarkily whisper and you sent him a glare that made him quiet down

‘haji-kun, im fine’

you dismissed and side stepped to go sit next to oikawa, completely brushing him off

now iwa was confused

you would usually smile up at him, say ‘aw~ are you worried about me, haji-kun?’ then skip over

not frown and act so coldly

‘oi, y/n, what-’

‘lets go to the bakery! theres a sale going on there!’

oikawa shouted which made you jolt in surprise

he knew of his best friend’s beginning interrogation but he knew you were too upset to be bothered by hajime’s questions

‘they have a buy one get one sale on milk bread! and those-those treats you like! theyre on sale too!’

omg oikawa is a real one 🥺

oikawa blinked harshly at you to go along with the act and you stuttered and nodded

‘uh-eung! yea!’

that was probably the moment that iwaizumi started noticing

except he thought it was a pining between his best friends rather than you towards him

ofc iwa was a loyal friend

he thought that you and oikawa were two people who were crushing on each other yet too afraid to say anything

tbh he shouldve seen this coming because duh you were an incredibly pretty girl and oikawa was the handsomest guy in the whole area!

it was almost,,, natural for you both to gravitate towards each other

maybe thats why,,,

he started to distance himself to give you both the space and want without him in between

maybe thats why,,,

he started to feel these feelings of,, jealousy?? like he started to feel a little scared and honestly he wasnt sure who to be jealous of bc he knew once you started dating, you’d both be too busy to hang out with him

maybe thats why,,,

he was no longer your friend

iwaizumi hajime became a simple stranger you would just pass by in the hall

it happened around the 2nd year of middle school

you and oikawa were still close friends but you have drifted away into not being as close while you and iwaizumi became,,,, distant

basically strangers

the boy you used to dream about when you were 8 and dreamt of marrying once you were old enough

he was no longer him

before, you and iwa were actually really close without oikawa

like you would hang out when oikawa was too busy with takeru

you both would go to the arcade and play games with no fear of oikawa whining and complaining to take turns

you had a lot of fun together and yet, all of a sudden, everything stopped

because iwa knew how,,, possessive oikawa was

he thought that if he were to continue being friends with you, he would risk losing his best friend out of jealousy or misunderstandings and he didnt want that precious bond to be ruined by a girl

even if that girl,,,

was you

thats why it was so awkward when you came over to oikawa’s house after so long and seeing him there, eating breakfast in the kitchen

your best friend didnt want to tell you that iwa spent the night bc quite frankly, oikawa was already fed up with this

you think he didnt know?

you think he didnt know that iwa distanced himself due to an unknown misunderstanding?

you think he didnt know that you also distanced yourself due to being hurt as he casted you aside?

and oikawa was also worried

he didnt want to ever bring up your name with iwa bc to be honest, he didnt think iwa even liked you all that much

he thought that iwa only tolerated you for so long bc you were the only girl who wasnt in love with oikawa and knew you long enough to be comfortable w you

but babie oiks is misunderstood that :(

he didnt want to ever bring up his name with you bc he knew how sensitive it was for you and how sad and pained you were when he suddenly stopped even replying to your texts

one time when you cornered him, he looked angry and gently pushed you back and quickly walked away

no he was scared that oikawa could see you both and misunderstand

‘just,,, stay away from me, okay? its better this way’

god you wanted to scream at him and shout at him and punch him but he kept silent and refused to answer your questions and refused to acknowledge your existence

you were so confused and you were just so hurt and eventually, you became indifferent to him and treated him the same way

anyways

you stepped into the house, not even bothering to shout your arrival and quickly wandered through the hallway before turning the corner to go to the kitchen

but you stopped, seeing the familiar hair with olive eyes eating breakfast on the kitchen island, also stopping with his chopsticks halfway to his mouth at the sight of you

your gazes clashed and you blinked before your lips formed into a thin line, turning and going to the fridge and look for food

iwa wasnt surprised

he figured you were both getting closer to dating and you were already basically living in his house

it all makes sense

BRUH THEYVE BEEN FRIENDS SINCE THEY WERE LTR BORN LIKE BLS THEYRE JUST SIBLINGS

MAKE IT MAKE SENSE

‘h-how are you’

he mumbled, trying to fix the awkward silence while cursing inside of how long oikawa was taking to shit

you hummed, taking a water bottle and slamming the fridge door shut, harder than necessary

‘oh, now you see me?’

you really didnt mean for it to be a snarky comment but it came out before you even realized what you said

he winced

‘listen, im-’

‘oh? youre here, y/n-chan!’

oikawa’s voice cut him off and he returned back to his bowl of rice, leaving you standing there furrowing your brows

you shrugged, already knowing that hajime was like this, so you turned to look at oikawa with a wrinkled nose at the sound of the toilet flushing

‘tooru, did you drink straight milk again? you know how it makes your stomach upset’

you chided and tooru turned red at the implication of his dookie

‘o-oi! y/n-chan! of course id know if i was lactose intolerant!’

i just think how funny it would be like the irony of his love for milk bread yet being lactose intolerant at the same time

he huffed and you nodded but not exactly believing him

‘kay kay’

you teased and walked to the living room but oikawa caught you in a headlock and he ruffled your hair while you complained and whined to let you go

you were giggling as tooru was giving you noogies, feeling the tension leave your body

all while iwa was watching

maybe it was because he stopped hanging out with you and havent seen you like this for almost a year

so carefree and so happy as you scored higher than him at the hoop game and he would begrudgingly let you hug him when he managed to win you a doll from the claw machine

but yea he definitely forgot your smile

he forgot how it looked like bc the last time you met gazes, you sent him a hurt glance and looked away and he knew he deserved that

god he hated it

but no, he was doing this for tooru

he was doing this because his best friend liked someone who actually deserved him

but dear god why did it hurt

iwa was starting to wonder if he made the right choice

he could easily handle you two dating

right?

maybe that was when iwa started to realize,,, he was starting to feel different towards you

the time apart definitely made him remember why he was friends with you

you weren’t like those girls he saw in tv or outside with the frilly clothes and the makeup and the fancy hair

no that wasnt you

you were different

you were too lazy to even pick out a cute outfit, opting for comfort with one of their sweatshirts and sweatpants

you preferred to chase after butterflies rather than sitting inside bc hajime’s adventurous spirit latched itself on to you too

you would usually climb the tree to get the volleyball that got stuck up in the branches bc tooru was too scared of heights and you wanted to prove your strength and capability

god you were so different

what if you liked him instead?

iwa startled himself with that thought in the middle of eating and caused him to choke on his rice

tooru noticed him coughing violently so he grabbed the water bottle from your hand and threw it straight towards the boy

iwa snapped the cap open,not caring where that water came from, and chugged it down before sighing in relief after the quite scary situation

you then realized what happened and you turned red, speedwalking into the living room

oiks totally didnt do that on purpose and he was doing the lenny face at you before switching masks and wearing a worried one for iwa

‘iwa-chan! you need to slow down!’

he chided and iwaizumi yelled at him to be quiet, completely clueless to the fact that he just shared an indirect kiss with you

but you did and lordie did you hate it

from then on,,,

iwa was just seeing you everywhere

iwa saw you from his classroom when you would go hang out with your new friends outside

he noticed you not even being too loud, only speaking up when asked while the others opted to continue talking about nonsense you probably gave no care about with how you secretly rolled your eyes

those moments made him laugh

the next time you both ran into each other was during his morning practice

oikawa phoned you in the morning while you were getting ready, saying he accidentally left his knee pads at home and he was already at school but you werent so he wanted you to bring them to him

you knew damn well that iwaizumi hajime would be there but you didnt care because youre not even friends anymore after he just dropped you like that

YES SISTER WE DESERVE BETTER

so thats why you found yourself pushing the metal gym door open at 6 in the morning and shouting oikawa’s name

his eyes brightened at your voice and he dropped the ball to run towards you by the door

‘oh my god thank you so much, y/n-chan!’

he shouted and hugged you out of excitement while you cringed and hit him to get off of you

‘ew dont touch me trashykawa’

you mumbled and he whined, finally stepping away with a pout

iwa was watching you both from the side and he blinked, wondering if you were trying a new hairstyle

if not, then you changed something bc currently, you practically glowing to him

he watched you scold oikawa for being forgetful and him begging for forgiveness but also thanking you before he was scoldede again by the coach

but the coach was relieved that he could finally play with the proper equipment and not risk anymore injuries

oikawa was already bidding you good bye and you were about to turn to leave when you finally met the many gazes of iwaizumi hajime

your eyebrows unconsciously furrowed together and your lips turned to a frown then you sharply turned and walked through the doors

unbeknownst to him, oikawa watched as his best friend’s face turned hurt at your expression and remained staring at the door you just went out of even when you were already gone

‘iwa-chan, lets get to practice’

after that

iwa has concluded god has decided to be mean to him

bc who was giving him these weird heart attacks and tummy aches at the simple sight of you?

literally he ignored you for a good time yet now hes noticing you again?

what kinda unfairness-

but you proved to accept his previous behavior by not even giving him a single glance anymore

that made him sad so iwa would sometimes stop doing what hes doing so he could freely stare at you laugh at something a classmate said during class

thats totally not creepy iwa lol

he doesnt even know hes doing it sometimes bc hes so absorbed on trying to figure out the answers of his questions

but the worst was when he got caught

you sat at the very front and oikawa and iwa sat at the back

it was lunchtime and you were eating with a few girls and a guy from another class and yall were laughing and talking together

iwa had oikawa and these other guys makki and matsukawa from the class next door to eat lunch with

can i please just dream that our third year seijoh boys were actually friends since the very beginning like pls and thanks

oikawa was rambling about how some girl giving him cookies the other day when he noticed iwa not listening but staring at you while moving his chopsticks around

poor iwa-chan was confused as to how even with messy hair, you still looked beautiful?

like no matter what angle or how you turned, the light always seemed to hit you perfectly to accent out your features

how was that possible?

‘-and she just-iwa-chan? iwaizumi?’

he called out and said boy jolted, eyes widening at the confused, bored, and knowing eyes

‘hm?’

‘oh? were you looking at y/n-chan?’

oikawa teased and the gojira fanboy waved his hands around to deny that statement

but makki chuckled and leaned in

‘hm, wouldnt blame ya. shes really pretty you know? some guy in our class saw the girls ranking and shes in the top 5′

okay iwa was angry

was it because everyone else noticed how pretty you are?

was it because you were part of this list?

was it because his own friend said you were pretty?

why did he even care anyways?!

oikawa smirked at the clenched fist under the table and decided to poke fun even more

‘oh really? well, it doesnt really matter because its always the girl’s decision right? but most of the time, their choice is utter trash’

the meme duo shared a confused look

‘hah? what are you going on about, oikawa’

oikawa internally apologized to you after what hes about to do because hes so tired and exhausted of having to be so careful and walking on eggshells between you two

so he did an oikawa move

‘yanno how y/n-chan and i have been friends since we were little ducklings right? so ages ago, like ages ago, little y/n-chan had a crush on this brute bc for some reason she thought he was brave or something and apparently thats appealing to girls rather than the nice and gentlemanly type. but of course, yanno how this goes, he pooped up and now hes stuck on doing this weird stalking staring thing. right, iwa-chan~?’

okay im sorry i take it back oikawa is a bitch

iwa shook

you,,, had a what on who?!

a crush on him?!

is he the brute?!

so it wasnt oikawa?

it was to him?

then why did you act like that?

why did you both act like that?

‘what’

iwaizumi mumbled and he met oikawa’s pointed gaze

‘hmm,,,, you dont have to worry about it anymore though since theyre not even friends anymore. but listen to me and listen well, makki, mattsun, if you hurt a girl even once, theyre never going to forget it. my sister said that apparently theres this little voice in their head that tells them that theyre going to get hurt again and thats where their trust issues begin to develop and--IWA-CHAN WHERE ARE YOU GOING?!’

iwa was already out of his seat and straight walking towards you and your group before stopping beside your chair

your friends quieted down at the sight of the known boy and you blinked then turned your head to see him, your eyes instantly turning dark and looking away immediately

‘what the hell do you want’

you hissed and natsu almost choked on his rice ball if it wasnt for another girl patting his back

‘it was me, right? all along, not oikawa, but me?’

his meek voice made you look up in confusion

‘what are you talking-’

‘you chose me instead him’

then it was like a click that you realized what he said

‘how did you know’

‘i-i’

he stuttered but was cut off when the teacher finally arrived to announce the end of lunch and iwa was forced to go back to his seat

the whole class time, you would sneak glances back and iwa would be staring at his paper while oikawa would wink at you and give you smirks

OH GOD HE TOLD HIM

after class you stomped up to the brunette haired boy

‘how could you?! why did you tell-’

‘lets talk, y/n? please?’

iwa was holding your arm and you glared at him before turning away and walking away

oikawa patted him on the shoulder in good luck and whispered,

‘get your girl’

the rooftop ledge looked really delicious right now

no words were exchanged so you were both just silent with you staring at him while he was looking off to the side

‘so what? now you know and so what do you want?’

you spoke first and iwa guiltily met your eyes

‘everything was,,, a mess. i misunderstood and i didnt communicate and i,,, messed up’

he mumbled the last part but you caught it perfectly causing you to scoff

‘damn right you did. so now you know and then youre going to do the cliche thing they do in those dramas where you magically profess your love for me and-’

‘hey y/n lets date’

you froze and looked at him shocked with wide eyes and jaw dropped

‘excuse me? who are you to say that?!’

you shrieked

‘first you think i have some big crush on tooru and this caused you to basically drop me like a damn pencil and second youre asking me to date you? iwaizumi hajime i thought you were always the smarter one. what the hell are you spouting you damn imbecile-’

iwa did the only thing he thought of

he quickly leaned forward and pecked your lips

he saw some guy do it in a telenovela that his mom watched a week ago and that was how the girl got silent so iwa thought it would be smart to shut you up that way

and it worked

bc you were so conflicted: angry, confused, sad, happy

you was the whole range of emotions in one second

‘i was stupid. and i was dumb. i wanted to give you and shittykawa space because i thought he liked you and he would be mad and misunderstand if we continued hanging out without him. but you shouldve told me you liked me, baka. maybe i wouldve come to like you back’

iwa rambled but your eyes watered and you huffed, slapping him across the face but pulled his collar to kiss him again

tbh iwa was shook bc he got 2 kisses in a row today and hes never been kissed before and its from this really pretty girl

‘how dare you kiss me and still not like me’

you seethed when you pulled away

but iwa held your hands

‘im starting to come to. give me time and i’ll accept your confession’

and give him time you did bc you finally were able to try and mend that friendship again and soon, you were already starting to fall back in love with him

but iwa also

during the end of your 2nd year, iwa nervously tugged you to the rooftop and you smirked

‘what? you gonna profess your love for me haji-kun?’

you teased and expected him to laugh and smack you gently but he didnt

he turned red and he looked down at his shoes as he magically produced a flower out of nowhere

‘please accept me, y/n!’

he shouted while holding out the single white carnation

your eyebrows scrunched and you grabbed the flower from his hands before punching him weakly

‘stupid! stupid haji-kun! i already accepted you! since we were five! how could you not see my feelings’

you whimpered, trying to hide the blush on your face but he smothered you to a hug, making you both topple over in the process

you had the cliched term of ‘summer love’

of course you still hung out with tooru but you both would hang out other days just you both

like you and iwa liked going over to some old playground by your house and you both would watch the sky on top of the slide assembly while talking about stupid stuff and the future

‘haji-kun, do you know what you want to be when youre old?’

you asked and he turned his head to look at you but you were focused on the stars

‘gojira’

he simply replied and you giggled, reaching over to hit his chest

‘baka. you cant be gojira-san’

iwa found himself giggling with you before he reached down to softly interwine your fingers and hold them up to look at them

‘hm, i dont really know. maybe a volleyball player. or someone in the volleyball team, i dont know’

you hummed, knowing him and tooru’s shared love for the sport

‘i wanna be a doctor. i want to save lives and help people and make money too! my mothers friend offered to intern me but apparently im still too young’

you pouted

iwa listened to you but then a lightbulb rang in his head

‘oi, y/n’

he started and you looked at him

‘you can be our manager. or medic. or doctor person. that bastard is going to push himself even harder because naoki-senpai gave him that damn position and he might kill himself trying to beat that farmer dude. besides, shittykawa is going to be the captain next year and i’ll be vice so youd easily get it anyways. so you in?’

you blinked at him before breaking out to a smile

‘eung! i wanna see my baby play what he loves!’

iwa’s face contorted to disgust

‘bABy?! iM nOt a BABY! im A mAn!! mAN!!’

‘mhm, okay. my mans, haji bara arms is my mans’

your relationship is very balanced with the perfect ratio of crackhead and seriousness and understanding bc as we ALL KNOW EVERYTHING STARTED W A MISUNDERSTANDING

like if he accidentally said something that hurt your feelings like that dress incident from years ago btw you brought it up to him and told him you were practically traumatized by that and he kept on apologizing and appearing at your doorstep with a white carnation in apology you would gently tell him bc communication is K E Y and he would tell you sorry and you guys would understand and make up

you guys were so lovey dovey that ltr oikawa would fake gag and throw up to the side when he catches you guys even doing things like holding hands

like bls he sees that flesh to flesh contact and he wretches his breakfast

‘ew, its the settling down for me’

‘its the flatness of the ass for me’

you stuck your tongue out while he pouted and iwa looked so proud like oml

you guys were still at the honeymoon phase where everything was peaches and rainbows and it continued until your 3rd year

as mentioned above, iwa basically gave you the managerial position

like yall were walking to school during the first day talking about how worried yall were at passing your classes when suddenly he was all like ‘ill see you in the gym later?’

you smiled and blinked confusingly

‘hm? you want a cheerleader there, baby?’

he flushed red at the nickname and furrowed his eyebrows

‘baka, stop calling me that’

you giggled and dodged his gentle smack but he grabbed your hand and pulled you close to his chest

‘i thought we already agreed that you would be our medic slash manager? i mean, it could give you experience for the future right?’

you rested your chin on his front to look up at him and your face held a teasing smirk

‘hmmm~~~ haji-kun just admit it. you want me to be there to cheer you on~’

you teased and nuzzled your cheek on him

iwa scoffed but he couldnt help a soft smile appearing

‘i mean-yea, but its for the future so ill help you every way i can’

‘oya? the future? will you marry me in the future, haji-kun?’

‘MARRY?! HOW DID YOU GET MARRY OUT OF THAT, BRAT’

‘AAWWWWW DONT BE SUCH A TSUNTSUN HAJI-KU-ACKDKJFSLKJNOT THE HAIR!!!’

sure enough you were at the gym after school

the coaches knew you werent a fangirl of oikawa bc hes seen you since the very beginning and oikawa clears you are actually a sister to him and you were fit for the job

ofc hes captain and someone as good as oikawa was going to get what he wants

the gym was full of newbies and recruits hoping to get into the powerhouse team and your eyes scanned to find those ridiculously pretty olive eyes that belonged to your beloved-

‘HAJI-KUN~~!!!’

you waved and shouted loudly, gaining his and everyone else’s attention as well

the underclassmen cooed and awed at you bc their senpai who was famous for being really pretty was in the building

‘waaaa its l/n-senpai’

‘shes so pretty’

‘oMG shes righT iN FroNT oF me!!’

yea you get the gist

the poor ‘haji-kun’ was shrinking under the attention and was growling at oikawa’s teasing look but he begrudgingly held his arms out for you to run into them and snuggle into him

‘hmmm i missed you, haji-kun. im really sad we’re in different classes this year. but then again! i can be here with you!’

you pouted and he ruffled your hair affectionately

‘why else do you think i offered it brat’

oikawa rolled his eyes and gagged before taking your arm to the coach so he could sort you out

‘honestly! not in front of the children, okay?!’

but everything was quickly resolved and you were finally officially their manager/medic

you did managerial duties and you were the go-to when someone falls harshly or gets hurt in any way

in between homework, school, reading medical books, and practice, you and iwa havent spent a lot of time together and tbh that was quite straining your relationship??

like it was something that you saw coming and you both even had a talk about it but you still feel like you didnt prepare enough when it did come

one day, it was monday and there was no practice so you and iwa were walking home together

he squeezed your hand occassionally and you would sing and hum while walking

and omg his heart would balloon up when you would smile up at him and giggle when you would catch him staring

he honestly thought youd both hang out and just lay on the couch, snuggle, yanno the routine

but once you pulled out your textbooks, notebooks, and pens, he was confused

like he even held your hands and stopped you from pulling anything else out

‘y/n? i thought we were,, watching a movie or something?’

you blinked and shook your head

‘i need to study for a test and i still need to memorize how to treat a sprain, haji-kun. there’s more important things to do right now. maybe later?’

more important things?!

more important than showering you with love?

more important than even spending a second with him?

now, dont get him wrong, iwaizumi hajime was by no means a clingy and possessive boyfriend

he understood the boundaries and he understood the priorities

but dear god its been WEEKS since he even hung out w you since your entire schedule seemed to throw him out of loop and acted as if he didnt exist

and now, he was aggrivated and irritated and he wanted nothing but to just cuddle his girlfriend

you noticed his huff and pout but he remained silent

you quirked an eyebrow and placed your pen down

‘haji? whats wrong?’

his eyes snapped to you and you knew now he was angry

‘oh? were you able to spare a few seconds for dear old me?’

you were taken aback and you knew there was a fight brewing so you hid your growing irritation and calmly put your things aside

‘hajime, what are you on about?’

you pried and he looked shocked, almost offended

‘what am i on about? what am i on about? y/n, do you know the last time i even came over? the last time i held you and just talked?’

his voice got louder by every word and you quickly stood up

‘dont you dare raise your voice at me, hajime. if we have a problem, we talked over it calmly. we dont yell or shout, nothing gets resolved. we talked about this’

but he scoffed

‘talked? when was that? when did we actually just talk? hm? because I sure as hell dont remember it’

youve only seen hajime angry once and it was when you lied to him to go spend time with oikawa

okay in your defense, oikawa was having a panic attack and he begged you not to tell iwa because he didnt want to be scolded by iwa even though you kept telling him that iwa wasnt like that

and theres a reason as to why its only been a one-time thing because iwa was known to have patience that was as long as the damn nile river

except for oikawa bc it seems oikawa just cuts that patience by a million

and when he finally snaps, its when he couldnt take it anymore and he finally gets loose

when iwaizumi hajime was angry, you really done it

you didnt really know how you handled that anger so you were at a loss and you were feeling conflicted and pained at the way he looked at you

‘h-hajime,,,’

you started and he looked at you expectantly

‘well? when did we last actually talk outside the school premises y/n?’

there was that inner witty voice of yours that wanted to say ‘right now?’ but you held it in bc he was completely serious

‘hajime, please understand. i-i dont want to let anyone down! my grades! the team! i-’

‘but what about me, y/n?’

he tiredly asked

‘do those things-those people- matter more than me? and i really really dont want to ask that but im so so confused y/n’

despite sounding manipulative, you knew iwa was feeling defeated and he couldnt help but ask those questions and sound so desperate

so you scrambled to sit next to him on the couch and held him against you

‘of course you matter to me-haji you mean everything to me, you understand? god, if an adult hears me theyd think im crazy but i love you, hajime. i love you and im so sorry if i ever made you feel that way because i really didnt mean to, okay? im so sorry’

you sobbed and he turned to fully envelop you into his arms and he sighed contently, remembering how good it felt to have you right there

‘no, im sorry, doll. i was being clingy and i didnt mean to lash out, i-’

you slightly let go and cupped his face

‘nonono you were perfectly valid. what you felt was perfectly reasonable. i havent been a good girlfriend lately, huh?’

you sadly smiled but he kissed you, holding you even closer

‘youre always a good one to me. always. just with a not good schedule but we can fix that, right?’

SORRY I REALLY DONT KNOW HOW TO WRITE A FIGHTING SCENE BC ITS ANGSTY AND I DONT DO WELL WITH ANGST BC IT MAKES ME CRY 😭

tbh that was really your only big fight

even when you guys graduated middle school, you both were still quite happy and you both worked hard to make time for each other

HOWEVER

when high school arrived, you both had chosen an extremely hard decision

you chose to go to karasuno while oikawa and iwa went to seijoh

which was a,,,, hard and difficult decision

in fact, you both didnt have a fight per se, just a disagreement that ended in like 30 minutes lmao

tbh its so scary and concerning of how rarely you both have bad times and how quickly it gets resolved

BUT THEN AGAIN THIS IS AN ANGST REQUEST SO ILL OF COURSE BRING IN THE SADNESS

you were busy with karasuno and you were actually taking college courses since you wanted to have a good record if you ever wanted to get into a medical field

that meant you had a lot of homework and most of your time was spent with schoolwork or interning for that family friend mentioned earlier

and you were also a manager for the volleyball team bc karasuno is a butt and they require you to have an after school club

so that meant,,,

no time for iwa

and fate just so happens to hate you bc the days you did have off, he would be busy with volleyball and he wouldnt be able to spend time with you

even weekends were like that

eventually, you both went for 2 months with no contact, just a few text messages and calls

and that strained your former strong relationship

and you knew that iwa was getting angry again with how he even typed his responses

‘want me to bring over snacks for the team?’

‘its okay. wouldnt want you to waste time or anything’

like that type of bull

you were getting increasingly worried because you havent had a good proper time to talk to him about it and you didnt want to fight over the phone

your best friend, kiyoko, noticed your anxious ticks and she snapped you out of your current daydream

‘hey? y/n? you okay?’

she gently asked and you blinked before nodding

‘mhm. just,,, thinking’

but she didnt buy that lie because you went back to chewing your lips and eyes even watering

‘i can revise your notes for you, y/n. and the team isnt doing anything big so i can handle it. you just go see him after school bc i cant handle you being sad anymore’

kiyoko gently smiled and you almost cried bc finally! you were able to clear your schedule enough to go visit your boyfriend

at the end of the school day, you bolted out of there and you were running and huffing all the way to seijoh bc you really wanted to talk to him as soon as possible

the gym was clear in view and you smiled, looking forward to seeing your beloved boy, when you saw him and oikawa being surrounded by girls

now keep in mind, youve suffered through middle school with oikawa and you were his best friend and has known him since you were a toddler

so you know of his looks and the attraction it brought him from all the females

so that didnt really bother you

but what bothered you was the horde of girls that stuck on to your boyfriend and he didnt even look bothered

just,,, blank

not even pushing away or feeding into their actions

just,,, standing there

‘haji?’

you called out and as if he had a built-in sensor for you, his ears twitched and he swiveled to look at you

‘y/n’

he breathed out and you smiled gently

iwa quickly moved away from the girls and he grabbed your hand so you both could go somewhere else to talk privately

the back of the gym was quiet and you leaned against the wall, iwa joining you shortly

‘how-how are you?’

you asked and he scoffed, totally surprising you

‘is this how we are y/n? asking each other questions as if we’re friends who are meeting for the first time in a while? wait--actually we are arent we?’

you grimaced and looked to the side, knowing he starts his stages of anger with being passive aggressive

‘haji,, please understand’

you pleaded and swiveled to stand in front of him

iwa didnt meet your eyes, instead shoving his hands in his pants pockets and eyes trained to his shoes as he kicked rocks

‘y/n, ive been trying,, for months ive been understanding. please dont ask me to understand anymore’

he snipped and you sniffed

‘im doing this because-because my grades are starting to matter! my future is resting on these years! i have to-’

‘dont you think i know that?!’

he cut you off harshly

your eyes were shaking at his attempt to calm himself down and his trembling hands

‘dont you think i know that you are doing this for that? because ive known you since i was five y/n and i know you would push everything-everyone- else aside to reach a damn goal of yours. no matter the cost, as long as you get it, right? well youve always been like that and somehow i still accepted that yet years later here we are’

iwa waved his arms around to accentuate his point and hurt was bubbling inside your chest at a subtle jab at your flaw

‘well im sorry mr. volleyball ace player! im not talented in any area so i have to depend on my studies to get me a future! so fck me for trying to survive and create a life for us!’

‘us?! how is this for us?! y/n we cant even last a single year being apart and youre already thinking ahead of the future?!’

‘im doing this for you! for us! just wait hajime! we will be happy-’

‘I DONT CARE IF ITS FOR THE FCKING FUTURE! I WANT TO BE HAPPY WITH YOU RIGHT HERE, RIGHT NOW! AND WHY DOES THE FCKING FUTURE MATTER SO DAMN MUCH WHEN WE CANT EVEN-’

‘BECAUSE I LOVE YOU AND I WANT TO BE WITH YOU!’

you shrieked

‘HOW CAN YOU LOVE ME IF YOURE NOT LOVING ME?!’

he huffed and harshly wiped away tears that fell

your lips trembled, hands shakingly reaching out to grasp his arms

‘ha-hajime,, don-’

‘should we break up?’

was he asking you this right now?

seriously?

‘what?’

you whispered and he finally looked up to let you see his pained eyes

‘y/n do you know what day it was yesterday?’

he asked and you blinked, looking everywhere as you tried to remember any important events

‘t-tuesday?’

that seemed to snap his patience

with an angry grunt, he turned to punch the wall and crouch to hide his face in his hands

‘damn it, y/n’

he whimpered and your heart broke as you could hear his cries

then it clicked

anniversary

it was your 2nd anniversary

and you completely missed it

completely forgotten

you shrunk back and let out a cry before placing a hand over your mouth to muffle your cries

‘ha-haji-’

you sniffled and you tried to go closer to him but he wiped his eyes and stood back up

‘y/n lets break up’

iwa requested with a cracked smile

your eyes widened and you ran to his chest, wrapping your arms around him as if you let go, he would disappear

‘haji, we can talk about this! we cant-please dont do this-i can fix this-’

‘we will only hurt ourselves even more if we continue this. i dont want us to hurt anymore y/n. so please, for once, listen to me’

your heart shattering cries filled your space and he didnt think it was this hard until he finally said it

it was a decision that he has been hanging around for a while and even consulted oikawa about it

‘iwa-chan, if you love y/n so much, its best to let her go. dont make you both suffer anymore’

‘i cant-hajime youre it for me-please dont leave-’

you hiccuped and continued to sob

but iwa remained a pillar and squeezed you tightly against him

‘darling i believe we were meant to be. but we just did it all wrong. when the time is right, lets start over again’

he whispered, finally breaking down with you in his arms

-------

iwaizumi hajime became a taboo word for you

even with oikawa, he swore and vowed to never say either of your names and made sure that you would not be around the area when iwa would come over

like even when he knew iwa would just stay inside, he would be constantly on the lookout to make sure you both didnt see each other

the last time was when you both saw each other in the morning as you exited your house to walk to school

it must’ve been a few months after the breakup and even oikawa felt the raw pain hovering in the air

it was suffocating and oikawa had to motion you to walk because if you both stayed even a second, someone-or both- would start crying

you continued like that for years until you reached your third year

you continued being part of the volleyball team as the medic while kiyoko was the manager

the new recruits were causing up a storm and you were particularly fond of your kita kouhai kageyama tobio

‘kageyama? kageyama tobio?’

you asked once you caught sight of the familiar looking blueberry

he looked up and recognized you as his former manager

‘l/n-senpai!’

he shouted and you ran up to give the boy a hug

‘gosh! youre so tall now! i remembered when you were wee tall!’

you teased and ruffled his hair

‘uh-you know him, y/n?’

suga asked and you nodded

‘eung! we went to the same middle school and i was a manager there’

‘she was friends with iwa-’

ope

something flashed in your eyes

kiyoko knew that name bc of how you were so depressed about it for 2 years and she started shouting random nonsense, scaring the 2nd and first years

‘y/n! we got new medical tape!’

she sang out and you perked up

‘finally?! we dont have to use duct tape anymore?!’

you excitedly ran over and everyone was both shook that kiyoko was loud and two, you were actually excited over medical tape

kageyama shrugged and continued on training

he kinda figured something happened so he never said anything or asked you anything in fear of upsetting you

and when it was announced that you were going to a practice match with seijoh, kiyoko actually told you she would cover it to make sure you dont see him there

‘its fine, y/n, i got you’

but ofc, you couldnt skip inter high

ltr an event when anyone in the team could get injured so you forced yourself to just ignore it and go

you did a good job of hiding whenever he was in view until the time they actually faced each other

you were walking alongside kiyoko and settling some things down at the bench when you felt his stare

you grimaced at his intense stare and the entire team mistakenly took it as him being interested in you

‘HAH?! LOOK AWAY YOU BEANSPROUT!’

noya growled

‘YEA! DONT LOOK!’

ofc hinata echoed

the 3 seijoh third years exchanged looks of unease when iwa sighed and looked away

‘oi! dont do that, boke!’

kageyama chided and hit the orange boy with a water bottle at the head

hinata whined and glared at him

‘that porcupine was looking at l/n-senpai! he wants to steal her!’

‘boke-’

‘doesnt matter anyways. we broke up ages ago’

you tried to say it jokingly but they couldnt miss the crack in your voice

‘hah?! he broke up with you?! you?! goddess l/n-san?!’

tanaka raged and noya had his own face of shock

the famous seijoh ace dated you?!

this handsome bara arms muscle buff man had the priviledge to date you and yet broke up with you?!

‘yall didnt know that?’

kageyama questioned and everyone glared at him

‘how do you know’

‘i just did. i didnt want to say anything for this same reason that you guys didnt know and she wouldnt want her business out there’

he simply replied and continued filing his nails

you looked up and smiled

‘it doesnt matter anymore. it was years ago so its fine’

‘L/N-SAN WE WILL AVENGE YOU!’

‘WE WILL! WE WILL!!’

the three stooges swore and you smiled softly, ruffling each boy’s hair

‘then go out there and make me proud’

but we know how this goes

they lost and you were so devastated for the others and you dropped your bag to go and comfort a crying hinata

‘sshh, dont cry dont cry. im right here’

you cooed and he accepted your embrace, hugging you tightly

once he finally calmed down, you were able to get him to a good enough condition to walk to the bus to go home

you went back to get your bag when you found something on top of it

a single white carnation

and a small ripped piece of paper that said,

‘my name is iwaizumi hajime. i think youre really pretty’

a/n: iknowiknowiknow i died but im not back to life and this request was lowkey difficult and i dont think i did a good job w it because angst always gets too angsty for me but i couldnt resist giving this a sad ending like bls!!! and uwu im still working on that oikawa route bc ya girl cant decide how angsty she wants it to beeee and i have like 4 different versions of the route in my drafts hehehe,,,, but i hope yall liked this and uwu ive never been in a serious relationship before so i wouldnt know what to fight about and came up with this:(

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