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#and bruce is like >:( no
fernacular · 2 months
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Despite what you may have heard Bruce Wayne is not, in fact, a furry.
He is, however, very opinionated.
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bonerey · 4 days
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characters have to be a little bit awful in ways that you cant defend. its good for the ecosystem. your honor he did do that. He did in fact do that
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ashoss · 2 months
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some things dont change
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frownyalfred · 1 month
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Thinking about the JL finding out that Bruce has contingency plans for all of his kids and being horrified. But when the League asks them about it, all the kids are like “yeah! we actually all have them for each other just in case” and move on like it’s perfectly normal to have three different ways to take out your brother on hand (for emergencies).
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ditzybat · 23 days
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tim: sweet dog you got there. gordon: yes, this is our new drug-sniffing dog. tim: still training huh? gordon: red robin.. what do you mean? tim: ... tim: nevermind...
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violent138 · 2 months
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League members discussing meeting Robin at work:
"Compared to Bats, Robin was a total sweetheart. Ball of sunshine."
"Man, must've been a good day then, the kid I met was a real anklebiter. He pulled out a sword and everything."
"Anklebiter is harsh, the sweet boy I met barely said a word, he just kept asking about Themyscira and the lasso."
"He? I met a blonde girl."
"No, no, black haired boy with blue eyes. We're talking about Robin."
"Yeah same here, blue eyed and tanned."
"Pretty sure he had green eyes. And talked fancy. And kind of scolded me for time travelling."
"The child I met was paler than the moon."
"I'm telling you I met a girl, and she was Robin."
"Well... either we're all wrong or we're all right."
So they arrive at the conclusion that Bats has a shape-shifter for a kid.
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therandomfandomme · 5 months
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why do i imagine the batfam finally meeting the league and then one of them going 'how the fuck do you have so many kids?' and little shit Jason goes 'well, when two people love each other very much...' and because Bruce doesn't wanna listen to this, he tiredly reminds Jason: 'you're adopted' which naturally means that Jason is going to dramatically pretend that this is the first time he's heard that and how could Bruce keep this from him, much to the horror of the league and the exasperation of Bruce
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mysterycitrus · 10 months
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"[blank] is the best robin" please be serious
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"Bruce loves his children to infinity but sucks at communication" gotta be one of my favourite tropes.
What Bruce means: I miss you so much it hurts, you are a great hero, and I'm really glad that you still consider me as part of your life and share your thoughts with me.
What Bruce does: hums meaningfully in response to Dick's story.
What Bruce means: I'm sorry about everything that happened between us, I still love you and want to fix our relationship, I'm incredibly grateful that you don't avoid me.
What Bruce does: nods at Jason when sees him on the patrol.
What Bruce means: I deeply care about you, you are truly important to me, I worry about your health and I don't want you to repeat my mistakes, neglecting yourself for the sake of a mission.
What Bruce does: gives Tim a snack without any explanation.
What Bruce means: I'm very proud that, despite everything you were taught, you choose to be a good person and help people, you have a kind soul, and it's an honour to me to call you my son.
What Bruce does: gives Damian an intensive head pat.
Should I say that Cassie is a blessing?
They stare at each other's soul for a solid five minutes and it's basically a full ass conversation.
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tiffycat · 4 months
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The vibes on this guy... Maybe it's a Gotham thing
Continuation of my lil delusional crossover cause I still think it is very fun and also people seemed to like the first set of doodles :D
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ghost-bxrd · 4 months
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Prompt:
Instead of Dick or Tim, Red Hood straight up goes for kidnapping Bruce Wayne and keeping him hostage just to see how desperate the birds get in trying to find him.
It’s a foolproof plan. Batman won’t blow his cover unless absolutely necessary, and “Brucie” would never know how to slip away from a crime lord of Red Hood’s caliber. It’s foolproof. It’s perfect. Jason can keep dropping hints and make threats towards the birds and watch Bruce squirm without consequences if he plays this right.
But then “Brucie” keeps begging him not to hurt his kids…
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artistmarchalius · 4 months
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A continuation of this post, inspired by this tag from @ohposhers
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frownyalfred · 1 month
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okay so there were a ton of posts/fics about the hilarious "fuck/maryy/kill" Bruce Wayne & Justice League scenario (I read them all, amazing comedic timing y'all) but to me, the most hilarious scenario is the JL play fuck/marry/kill, Bruce's name comes up, and half of the people in the room in the know immediately turn bright red and refuse to keep playing and no one will explain why.
Hal: "...and I would fuck Bruce Wayne. No, I would kill him. Nah, actually I'd fuck him, who am I kidding."
Clark: choking on his coffee and rapidly turning an alarming shade of red
Diana: "An....interesting choice, of course."
J'onn: "Shall we play a different game?"
Hal: "Wait, what? that was the game, wasn't it?"
Ollie: "I'm with Hal, I'd fuck the shit out of Bruce. He's the easiest guy I know, it's not like it'll exactly be a hardship for him."
*every single person in the room turns to Batman, standing in the corner*
Clark: "Wow! I think I just heard someone drop an ice cream cone in Guatemala. Batman, I'll need a team up."
Ollie: "For ice cream?"
Diana, standing up and putting herself in between Bruce and Hal: "This sounds dire. I will also assist."
Clark, under his breath, one hand on Bruce's back: "It's not worth it. He's not worth it. Come on. Walk it off."
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ditzybat · 29 days
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clark, discussing what to do about kon with bruce: you know what this means right?
bruce, nodding: yeah, you owe luthor a buttload of child support
clark: what - i - no??
bruce: i mean, it sucks that he baby trapped you but you don’t want to be a deadbeat
clark: he did not - i am not his father, luthor stole my DNA and put that [pointing at kon] into a tube
bruce: i want you to take one good look on how damian came to be
clark: … oh my rao… i am dead beat aren’t i?
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homarcide-aest · 8 months
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pov you adopted a kid but you forgot hes not usamerican
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redsray · 3 months
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I love the hc that Tim never really stopped taking pictures of heroes and vigilantes even after he became Robin. Not even out of hero worship or anything-- he just found it fun. In fact, being Robin just made this hobby easier to do. He has them separated in folders and definitely has blackmail photos included.
The first time Tim met the Justice League one of his first reactions was to sneakily take at least one picture of each of them. Clark vaguely heard a camera shutter but he could never find any cameras or camera owners.
Sometimes Bruce comes to him and asks for specific pictures of members of the JL doing things they shouldn't be doing i.e Barry ditching a meeting cause he was eating Chipotle in the Watchtower kitchen. No one knows how Bruce gets the pictures except for the other Batfam members.
Tim is the god of blackmail right behind Babs. You need older blackmail or videos? Go to Babs. But Good quality blackmail photos? Tim is your guy.
He has at least 4 folders full of pictures of Dick specifically. One for his time as Robin, one for Nightwing, one for Discowing and one for just Dick.
He also manages to have pictures he definitely should not have because how did you get into the cave before you were Robin, Tim, but he refuses to elaborate on those. i.e Robin Jason out of costume, cozily reading at the batcomputer ("seriously, Tim, that's creepy"), Dick when he first adopted Haley ("were you there when I rescued her?!"), Damian training with the League of Assassins ("how the hell did you get that"), Duke back during the We Are Robin movement ("I do not remember you pulling out any cameras what the hell")
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